#and then i played it and i was like ohhhhh i see the appeal of letting funny lil deviant pick a wardrobe item that he likes

[moeblob]

Deviates to wear colorful shirts.

[bunny-jpeg]

showers - vash the stampede

pairing: vash the stampede x fem!reader rating: 18+ summary: You couldn't imagine life without Vash. He was almost too perfect, sure he was a little too enthusiastic sometimes. But you thought it was endearing. He was such a sweet lover, someone you could always rely on.

The Human-Typhoon settled down outside the major city for a life of relaxation. But sometimes when there was nothing to do during sandstorm season, and the condoms run out, it was highly possible to end up pregnant. tags: pwp, smut, pregnant!reader, shower sex, pregnancy kink, cowgirl & doggy positions

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You couldn't imagine life without Vash. He was almost too perfect, sure he was a little too enthusiastic sometimes. But you thought it was endearing. He was such a sweet lover, someone you could always rely on.

The Human-Typhoon settled down outside the major city for a life of relaxation. But sometimes when there was nothing to do during sandstorm season, and the condoms ran out, it was highly possible to end up pregnant.

You weren't expecting to get pregnant, you didn't even think it was possible given Vash's plant nature! But Vash was over the moon to be a parent! He was doting and caring.

But you knew, when you got changed into evening clothes and you stood naked in the bedroom, that Vash's blue eyes got a little darker. There was something about your pregnancy that riled him up. And while he never said anything, you could tell. Vash was an open book when it came to you, you knew what he wanted.

 “Vash-y.” You called from the bathroom.

  “Yes, my dear!” He replied as he opened the door to the bathroom and found a large amount of steam surrounding the shower. He could see your shadow though the curtain, what stuck out the most was your swollen belly. It was impressive in size.

You peeked your head out from the curtains and smiled at him, “I need a little help, honey. I, uh, can't bend over too well.”

His eyes went wide as he got closer to the shower, “Of course I'll help you, I am your husband after all!” He said with a chest full of pride. He was quite proud of himself, he was the only man who you'd have a family with. That made him quite happy.

He reached for the soap as you turned to face him, the water raining down on you. He noticed you touch your swollen middle. From his guess he'd say that you were having twins given his history, but who knew about plant and human genetics.

  “You're not going to come in?” You chuckled as you pushed wet hair out of your face, “I'm pretty sure you don't want a wet shirt.” You reached out to the collar of his white shirt.

  “Oh.” He said, “Ohhhhh. Well, I didn't know that! I thought you just wanted your belly washed there, angel!” He could feel the heat rise in his face. Even after all this time, he still got flustered by you.

Vash got a better look at your beautiful pregnant body. The way you rubbed your belly as he undressed. It made his pulse rise and heat rise in his cheeks even further.

  “Do you like what you see, Vash?” You took the soap from him and started to rub it on your swollen middle. You saw him swallow. Oh, that's what he wanted. You giggled, “Does someone have a thing for seeing me all pregnant?

  ”Oh! No! I love you too much to see you as an object, honey.“ He laughed nervously as he finally took off his bottoms but revealed his erection. He looked down and swallowed, ”It's not what it looks like!“ He was worried about seeming like he only saw you as a vehicle for sex. But there was something appealing about knowing that he knocked you up.

You chuckled again, ”Too funny, you worry too much Vash. I know you love me.“ You touched his cock, getting it wet with water, ”You're playing a weird long game if you just want sex.“ You could recall easily all the sweet things he had done for you, including giving you the chance to be a mother.

  ”I find you amazing.“ He said softly, ”I want you all the time. But the idea of hurting you scares me.“

You pulled him into the shower now that he was undressed then kissed him passionately under the spray of the water, ”You could never. Now lather your wife up.“ You turned to face the tiled wall and braced yourself against it to steady yourself. It was hard to be balanced nowadays.

His hands touched your belly from behind, his heart raced as he touched your belly. He could feel the weight of it and it made his cock twitch upwards. He swallowed back what he wanted to say before he buried his face into the back of your neck. He inhaled deeply as he felt your bump.

  ”Mmm, Vash.“ You moaned as you held yourself steady against the wall. Your hips were pulled away from it which left your pregnant belly hanging. You let out a high pitched noise when he started to massage your breasts.

They had grown quite a bit since you first got pregnant. Now they were so sensitive, which only made you grow hotter. Your cunt grew wet from the way he was playing with you.

  ”Vash.“

  ”I know, baby.“ He replied, ”Does it feel good?“

You nodded, “You have no idea. It's been so long since you touched me. I know we've been careful but I can't take it anymore!” You let the water rain down on both of you as he felt you up.

He played with your left nipple as his other hand reached down between your legs. He quickly discovered that you were wet and not from the water. He panted against the back of your neck as he slipped two fingers inside of you. He replied, “I can't take it anymore either, you're just too beautiful. I need you, honey. Let me have you.”

You moaned against the tiles as your fingers slipped down. Your cunt squeezed around his fingers as he played with your clit as well. You both panted as he started to finger you. The lust between you two only made the room hotter.

You turned your head to passionately make out with Vash. The blond's lips against yours in a heated kiss as he pleasured you. So much for helping you wash down. You felt pleasure course through your body, you felt on cloud nine as he pleased you.

  “That's it.” He said softly, “Such a good girl for me.” His cock leaked pre-cum as he continued to feel you up with one hand. You two continued to kiss.

Soon you believed you were soaked enough and turned off the water. The steam kept you warm as he continued to play with your pussy. He thought the sounds you were making were so erotic. It made him only turn on further.

The pleasure coursed through you and you encourage your husband to keep going with loud moans. You tensed up and gripped onto nothing against the wall. You leaned your head back and made out with your husband once more.

  “Please, Vash. I'm close.” You moaned before you climaxed around his fingers. You leaned further against the wall and panted heavily against the tiles. You moaned once more when he playfully rubbed your clit before he pulled his fingers out of you.

  “How was that?” He asked as he looked into your eyes. There was pink in his cheeks as he gazed at you with those blue eyes. You pulled him in for another kiss before he helped you down onto the floor of the shower. “Do you think you could help me too?”

You chuckled as you seated yourself in his lap facing towards the head of the shower and away from Vash. You turned your head to look at him and smiled, “Of course, honey.”  Then rubbed your cunt up against his cock which made him moan and lean his head back.

You raised your hips and leaned back to steady his cock so you could seat yourself onto it. You seated yourself onto his cock and started to roll your hips. You leaned forward and braced yourself on the floor as you moved up and down his cock. It was hard to get a good grasp of the floor due to the slippiness. But you did the best you could do.

You both moaned as you moved your bodies together. The sounds were erotic and bounced in the small bathroom. You knew you were going to have to take another shower after your fun in the bathroom.

Vash sat up and wrapped his long arms around you. He felt up your belly and eventually played with your breasts, with special attention to your nipples. They were hard between his fingers but feeling the heat of your skin made his cock twitch inside of you even more. It felt so good to him, it was so erotic to have his wife like this.

You two moved against one another, you felt your heart hammer in your chest as you moved up and down on his cock. Your mouth hung open as you moved up and down, your belly and breasts bounced wildly as you moved. Two lovers holed up in their home having the time of their lives before they become parents

His hands roamed your belly as he kissed your neck. His chest pressed against your back as he felt you thrust against him. His breathing was heavy against your wet skin, he'd make sure you were nice and clean after you were finished. But right now he needed his release.

  “Shit.”

  “Fuck.”

  “Ah!”

Pleasure raced through both of you as you moved. You knew how to make one another feel good, you could reach others like a book at this point in your relationship. But even if you knew everything about Vash, nothing could prepare you for what he did next.

He leaned over your shoulder and started to play with your clit once more. His careful fingers rubbed against you which made you tense up. You panted heavily, the mix of water and sweat on his skin. You reached behind yourself and held onto your blond lover.

Your bodies moved together, you felt over the moon about it. He could see your pregnant belly bounce with the thrusts of your hips. He groaned at the sight of you, you were so beautiful.

  “I love your body, you are so perfect. You look so amazing. I love knowing I got you pregnant.” He groaned, “You are so perfect, I want you for the rest of our lives.” He buried his face deep into your shoulder as he continued to move his hips up and down.

Eventually you ended up on your hands and knees with your pregnant belly swinging with thrusts. You gripped onto the floor below you and had Vash thrust up into you. You moaned loudly and praised your perfect husband for what he was doing to you. Working your body in such a way that it made you see stars with every thrust of his hips.

  “I love you.” He groaned.

  “I love you too. Fuck, Vash. I'm so happy I get to have your baby!” You moaned and moved your hair out of your face then continued to move your hips up against his cock. Your cunt was tight around his cock. Your heart was pounding in your ears and your head was spinning. The feelings were erotic, you felt over the moon with pleasure.

  “You're so perfect. I'm going to get you pregnant over and over again. The town will be full of little plant babies! Our babies!” He groaned. He loved your body, he loved how pregnancy looked on you. You carried his children so well and he couldn't wait to spend the rest of his days with you.

You felt the pleasure crash over you and with a few more thrusts of your hips, you climaxed on his cock again. And soon after, Vash finished as well. He gripped onto you tightly as he finished inside of you. Then you both sat there, coming down from your orgasmic highs.

He still held onto you tightly as you both breathed heavily. You got off of his cock and sat on the floor of the shower. You rolled your shoulders to get the kinks out of it, before you put your hand on your swollen belly.

He looked at you, ”How was that?“

You smiled while breathing heavily, ”Really good. Now, can you help me clean up now?“ You chuckled.

He smiled and came over to you, ”Well, who am I to say no? You are my wife after all.“ He leaned down to kiss the top of your bump. ”My sweet, sweet wife.“

xoxo,

U・x・U

[lylahammar]

(Feel the need to state this up front: I'm bisexual, afab, kinda cis but also kinda trans, nonbinary isn't the word I'd use for myself but... alas, it's the only one people recognize as a general consensus)

I've started to understand why the term sapphic is more appealing to some people, but it still really bothers me as a descriptor/category. When talking to a friend about it (she strongly prefers Sapphic as a term), I started to sus out why:

The vast majority of my initial exposure to the term was always attached to something... aesthetic? Stories or art or music, but of a specific *type*. To the point where it gained a hyperspecific meaning of a period or historical setting, "gay woman trapped in comphet marriage and needs to be saved by bold lesbian", young girls fooling around with girls with no need for commitment because everything is fleeting and nothing is permanent and choices dont matter... on their own, these are perfectly fine narrative choices and are fun to play in sometimes, but they sure start to just seem... repetitive and restrictive and borderline fetishizing. To me, it reads as a term specifying that the love women feel for other women is the only kind allowed, that it's true and pure in a way the love a woman feels for a man isnt, and that her true self can never be realized without admitting she was in love with women since the beginning and was always supposed to be. Achillean gives me the exact same vibe.

On the other hand, my friend feels the term is *less* specific, and to her it allows *more* room for people who don't identify strictly as feminine or as a lesbian, for her it just is a broad umbrella term that allows for any variation of girl-identifying-person who likes girl-identifying-people.

Ultimately, I don't think she's wrong, and I don't know that my interpretation is right. But I think I've been exposed to a.... imma call it a "hyper-aggressive romanticization" of a particular way of existing that just puts me on edge in a way that's hard to explain to people who don't feel the same way about it. I don't think there's anything wrong with romanticizing something like that it's just that... for me, who still identifies as a woman despite being om T, who is married to a cis woman, etc... it feels ironically exclusionary and fetishizing, and mostly feels fantastical and escapist, rather than grounded in anything real.

TL:DR, it feels like a book genre, not a usable term/identifier

Ohhhhh okay I see I wasn't sure if there was something actually problematic about the term that I wasn't aware of, that sounds like it's just a preference based off of the vibes of the way some people use it

honestly I prefer sapphic and achillean because the terms "wlw" and "mlm" are so clunky and hard to say and sound goofy in my brain lmao not to mention the fact that mlm has a separate negative meaning that gets mixed up a lot

and the term "lesbian" is very specific and doesn't apply to all women who are attracted to women

so like....... idk I guess it sucks that some people have given the term sapphic a bad association for some but I'm gonna keep usin it if that's the only reason why bc I don't really care about all that and if ppl know me then they'll be able to tell that I'm not being a weirdo about it lol

[robinsnest2111]

For the ship ask game, (should probs get the obvious out of the way for you here XD) TommyMick/Marlee, vinikki, nikkimick, terrorcest, Vince/Tommy (I don't know if they have an official ship name sorry), Vince/Mick.

I know you like poly!crue but I was wondering how you feel about these ships individually and hoped you could expand on your opinion (only if you want to, no pressure, otherwise you could just rate these ships with no further context, whatever you feel up to :))

ooooooh, get ready for a loooong answer with loads of explanations <3

this one's very obvious and self explanatory. in my mind, Tommy simply adores his old man. Sure, he plays tricks on him and makes some jokes but it's all out of love <333 Tommy can be a bit much for Mick sometimes (like a playfighting puppy!), but he knows Tommy's the youngest of the group, the most immature and energetic, and tbh I think he kinda thrives on that energy and enthusiasm <3

ohhhhh, the classic showrunner and his barbie doll/pretty face+voice of the whole band. Their sarcasm and cattiness mesh so well, but they can also be at each other's throats in an instant. Big personalities on the both of them. When they're on bad terms it's Bad bad, but when they're on the same page? Unbeatable. I feel Nikki is quite possessive of Vince, and Vince likes that special focus and attention most times <3

here comes the angst!!! Both Nikki and Mick are very strong willed and a bit one track minded when they've got a goal in their sights. A very explosive relationship I feel. Similar to Nikki and Vince, Nikki feels a similar type of possessiveness over his old man, a sense of adoration and worship that does weird things to his heart and mind he doesn't dare explore further. Mick doesn't jive with that possessiveness at all, especially when it smothers his creativity and autonomy in the band. Once again. When they're on bad terms, it's bad. But when things are good? They're really good, a strong team working towards a common goal <3 Factor in the sadness of the recent split and drama (and also the history of abandonment and near death experiences and other stuff) there's so much delicious and painful angst as well!!!

YES the terror twins!!! Literally made for each other. Two hellish imps, destined to cause mischief and mayhem! When they're together, they're like two untamed puppies, loud and rambunctious with a total disregard for each other's or others' safety lol Definitely the ship with the most bruises and lovebites.

I feel like Tommy awakens some maternal instinct in Vince, since he's the youngest lol Vince always fussing over Tommy, but also laying all his love on him. Tommy soaks it all up like a sponge <3 He would probably also pull some stupid stunts just to get Vince's attention. If it gets to out of hand, they'd end up in a big fight and not talk to each other for a while. But it'd all smooth back out eventually. Can't be mad at Tommy for too long lol

THE TINY BITCHES GOTTA STICK TOGETHER <3 The appeal of them both being on the shorter side compared to Nikki and Tommy 🙏 I think their sarcasm and strong personalities would mesh pretty well most times, especially if they're teaming up against the terror twins shenanigans lol They also have their bad moments, both finding the other grating to be around. Prissy barbie doll Vince and quiet brooding Mick... But also... opposites attract. I think Mick is best at seeing past Vince's pretty face and really getting him. And Vince appreciates it <3

If you've made it all the way through my rambles, congratulations!!! :D

---

ship ask

[midnxght-sweet-time]

it's nice to see someone else whos into the beta ver of characters! i wish more would be released on them or, and this is very wishful thinking, even a "what if" type event where we'd see at least beta/prototype riddle as he had the most written for him irc

Yesss!!!! I really wished there was more beta charac reveal from Yana. So far we only have the beta designs of characs like Silver or Malleus but the biggest hidden lore drop for beta characs was mainly beta Riddle. Though Riddle had more reveal and even almost became 'canon'. Its kinda sad he was scrapped and just gone qwq

OHHHHH but beta Jade is a whole nother can of worms to deal with.

SO—

I imagine punk Jade was some kind of edge phase he had when he was younger before his suave professional look lmao

I hced Jade likes to play as the villian. Like he probs has those 'playlist that makes you feel like a villian'. I find it funny how he tends to play out like the most professional badass but also still acts pretty gullible sometimes.

Yall think Floyd is the creepy one??? Bruh Jade is more on playing with the psychological tactics which I find much more scarier—

Im pretty Jade at some point probably wants to best Floyd. I hced him to be the younger twin, and of course all younger siblings like to try and one up the other. Maybe thats why Jade used to be a punk kind of guy, probably a delinquent as well and prefers more physical violence like Floyd.

Until my guy find out that villians who have a more polished and courteous style tends to be the most prefered and appealing (and in most cases— attractive 7w7). Which results into the kind of eel we all know and love now ♡♡♡

I want punk Jade to exists in the canon universe!!! Do you know how interesting that will be??? But atleast we can indulge in sweet- make believe headcanons and say punk Jade was a past memory. Unless for whatever reason the tweels' backstory has been fully explained and Jade confirms doesnt have a punk phase I will hold onto this belief for dear life-

Omg but Punk Jade and Delinquent Deuce combined????? PLEASE-

Speaking of which: punk baby eel Jade vs momma's boy deliquent Deucey. Who'd you think would win??

[mydysfunctionalvampirefamily]

I'm sooooo excited!!! My first episode caught up!

No! Not the music 😂😂😂 oh okay it was not that smooth sex jazz lmao.

Rufio???? In Miles's lust thing? Okay I'll have to wait and see how this works. ELSA THOUGH!!!

Protect your man!!!!

Oh Elsa 😔 "I wish you were there, you probably would have made the difference."

Ohhhhhhh this is really good. Part of Miles's dreams or lust is the thought that him being there could have saved people. It's such a self absorbed thing lmao. Like he is the lynchpin.

Sidenote: the sound design and the music is so good this episode, and I know it's not the case but I get such a giggle out of imagining this is done just to spite that one YouTube commenter who was like when are you all going to incorporate that when it has been for quite a bit. 😂

Elsa being there to listen to him. 😭

He would want Marcos back!!

She gives him the book to get people back from the dead. The fact that this is what tempts him!!

To have what you have to Britta. "She was never there to replace you."

No shit they weren't rational, Marcos!!! I'm losing my goddamn mind over here!!!

The fact that he thinks the reward is to get one of them back to life. Fuck me!

Pendragon is human???? Absolutely wild. I get it though. But also Romeo and Pendragon there at the same time??? I mean at this point we all think canary and Romeo were together, yes?

Britta's biggest hope is being human. 😭

A painting of Dark Selina above the fireplace with blue flames???

Her wish that the harsh sides of Pendragon were not his own but forced into him. That he would want to be different. Him wanting to impress his sire and not him just something that's inside of him. That he lets her know him better.

Ohh human AND vampire Pendragon.

Ohhh interesting. Pendragon wanting her for her humanity or wanting her for her killer side.

"I adoooore how strong you are." fuck this guy and fuck that he is so hot. I hate him. He's too powerful. 😂

"I can't beat him without you." *SCREECHING*

Oh my God! Z!!!! HELL YESSSSSS I'm glad he's back somehow!!

I love that they are both almost failing!!!

Khaliffffff babbbbby!!! Yes Neil's sire!!! 👀 I'm so intrigued. I need to know more.

Awww Neil 🥰🥰 wanting to save his friends.

Of course his fucking sire 'knows' exactly what he needs. Fuck you!! Go home!

No Miles doesn't have the enst track record, that is fair. But he tries, and that has to count for something.

I do love his sire just hating on Miles, I bet that does make Neil feel a little better.

Also calling it playing house with Roman Pendragon would so appeal to Neil. Who has been so judgemental about all of this with Britta.

👀 Neil talking to his sire. Like I'm sorry but we need like a prequel book about their fucked up relationship and the abuse and manipulation.

"they're yours." ohhhhhhh goosebumps.

Not the tearful "are they?" my baby boy 😭 this is gonna make me cry.

Neil!!! You're so good! I'm proud of you. 🥰

"boogiemen and a pretty girl." dismissive of Nara in a way that will please some people I know.

Hey Sire why don't you shut up!!! Neil did what he should do, he came to insight!! Leave him alone!

"Let's fix Miles." ohhhhh damnnn. Like I know this is all very difficult for the characters to deal with, but it is SO fun to listen to!

Z. Who is this she??? 👀👀👀

Of course he wants to be the solution! Look at Wynn!!!

Ohhhh yeahhhh baby more temptation!!! One of them is going to die????!!!! Absolutely not. That's not allowed. Resurrection tho. 👀 It will cost you nothing? Suss. Soooooooo suss.

Heyhooooo let's gooooooooooo temptation in the best way.

The idea of sacrificing himself for power and to save his friends, so alluring. Which is so funny because I don't think any of his friends would think it would take this particular shape.

AAAAAAAHHHHH, for realsies???? Lmao of course he did. 😂😂(I bet it's because Tim wants that special sword path he talked about. /j)

I'm so happy!!! Miles deserves to make bad decisions as a treat. I love that for him. 😈

Britta, my girl, I proud of you, but I knew you could do it.

🤢 Those sounds

Oh joy, we get Shrike, you're not making it better but I love that you try even if it's not that hard.

Ohhhhh yessss him offering to undo the indoctrination!!! Of course that is the biggest temptation, figuring out who she used to be.

"I wanted to be more of myself again." "you don't even know who you are?" that's fucked up.

Shrike is an asshole but he makes me laugh with the awful, dickish things he says.

Even here the canary gets triggered??? Poor Britta.

She did it!!!

What the fuck man, that was an insane episode. But so fucking good! I'm alrwady exited to relisten to it.

[sebsxphia]

Jake in a relationship with someone who tries to deflect any kind of sadness or worry with a little forced positivity as a defence mechanism. For example, he'd say he is getting deployed and she'd be like "yay!". It surprises him at first, then he finds it kind of funny, but then he starts to feel like she says this because she can't wait to be rid of him. Don't get him wrong, he can see her happiness at his return, but the constant positivity and almost no display of any sadness or worry at his departure starts playing with his mind. She always tells him that she is so proud of him and what an amazing opportunity it is and how great it is for his career, and he starts to feel like his career and position mean more to her than he as a person, as a partner does. And then one day, he brings it up she deflects it. He is trying to settle with that, but the thought keeps nagging him and it makes him feel a bit insecure. As proud as he is of all his achievements, and as much as he enjoys the ego stroke others' fawning and awe gives, he really thought that his relationship with her went beyond these layers. He really though that she wanted him for his whole being, not just one aspect of him. He thought that he showed her more for her to love and gave her more than the appeal and thrill of being with an aviator. And he did. And she truly did love him for more than the facade he put on with everyone else. But she was terrified that if she were to truly express the sadness and despair she felt when he left for deployments, he'd think that she wanted him to choose between her and his dream job. And there were so many other worries. What if he did choose his job over her? Or worse, what if he resigns for her, but then realises that it was the biggest mistake he's ever made and leaves? Or the worst, grows to resent her? And what if once she gave up the optimism, that would be the time he would not come home? She couldn't risk these.

But then the divide between them grows too big and the inner pressures grow too tense, and it all breaks free when he says he must leave for deployment right now. At first, she is like "oh, wonderful baby, you'll do great!" but her voice is strangely contracted. When she thinks Jake is gone, is out of earshot too, she breaks down, like she always does once she is home alone.

Little does she know that Jake did not have to go on another mission, nor did he leave. He snuck back in and witnessed her breakdown. He's by her side in a second. Holding her tight, soothing her with kisses on the head, fighting his own tears at the relief of knowing she really cares about him.

After this and a long, deep conversation, he knows and is sure of her love for him and also knows how to pull her out if she ever tries to deflect her worries instead of talking through them. And while she is still on the more optimistic side, she does not do it out of a compulsion, and makes sure to show him how much he means to her.

(Sorry for getting carried away and making this so long xxx Lots of love xxx)

-💚

oh jesus christ

ohhhhh my beloved anon!!! how do you always manage to capture jake’s personality so spot on?? because you’re so right, although he’s always desired the praise of others, he thought with you there would be something deeper that you would show. but jake begs and pleads to see your tears.

he tells you you don’t always have to keep up this wall and he knows better than anyone how this can affect loved ones. he wants to see it, to hear it, your pain.

oooooof. you put this beautifully my beloved anon and thank you so, so much for sending this to me!! never apologise, you know how much i love your wonderful work 🥹 i’m sending you so much love, mwah mwah mwah!! 💖💓💗

[cowboyhorsegirl]

Tony loves the gentle and sweet kisses Steve gives him constantly, but he’s like something a little spicier once their in bed and yet Steve seems either to twitterpated OR to scared of hurting him to do more then nibble while they do what can only be described as “make tender love”

much to Tony’s frustration

Is this due to:

A) angsty “Steve was way more down to get physical and down and dirty BEFORE Civil War and is way more gentle post because he scared of hurting him again” type issues

B) fuffy “Steve just really likes to be sweet to Tony because that’s just how he be” reasons

ohhhhh this is absolutely delicious 😈😈😈

i think it's a little bit of both. like we have to remember that steve is probably achingly gentle with anyone he takes to bed because he has to be. this man is so strong, he can't afford to lose himself in the moment and let go because there's a very real chance he could hurt the person he's with badly if he does.

so before CW, i imagine that it takes some time for them to figure out the limits and boundaries of what they want to get and are willing to give to each other in a way that's satisfying for them both. don't get me wrong, i think their sex is always enjoyable, even when it's simple because they do love each other and they've wanted each other for so long, so to have anything at all after so long resigning themselves to nothing is in itself an almost unbelievable thrill.

but tony can't help the flashes of annoyance he feels sometimes when he tries to bite down on steve's lip and gets only tender, slow and gentle kisses in return. he tries to spur steve on, begging him please to go faster, harder, rougher to no avail. tony jumps to the assumption that steve is treating him like glass because he thinks tony is weak and broken and scarred and that he can't handle anything more than the absolute sweetest of sex. it hurts, that the man he loves apparently thinks so little of him. he's a superhero for crying out loud, he knows that he can take a few bruises in bed and more than that, he wants to.

meanwhile, steve is just so overwhelmed with how happy he is to be with tony. he's lost so much—so many people that he loved—and he's well aware that he can't protect tony from everything, but he'll be damned if he can't even protect tony from his own super strength.

when tony first broaches the topic that he'd like their sex life to venture into the kinkier side, steve is a bit uncomfortable trying to imagine how he could derive pleasure from hurting tony when his body was only ever bestowed to him to be used as a weapon, to use force as a means to an end. but once tony explains that above the pain, or the domination, or the denial, above all else it's about trust, steve starts to understand the appeal. it's not a coercion, it's a conversation: tony wanting to give steve control because he trusts him, he loves him, and he knows steve would do right by him. and hey, what do you know, the more they indulge in that kind of kinky sex, the more steve finds himself enjoying it for himself beyond just the fact that he loves seeing the way tony gets delirious and blissed out when they play like that.

after CW, however, i think that they both make the mistake of trying to jump back into sex the way it was before even though in most other aspects of their relationship they take their time to reestablish their trust in one another in the aftermath of the harm they've levelled against each other. So yeah, months after the Accords are finally resolved and the Rogue Avengers get to come home, Steve and Tony begin to rekindle their romance. in the beginning, everything—every small touch and shared space—is a painstaking negotiation, a careful reconstruction of intimacy that used to come so naturally. and it's hard work and it's frustrating and there are days when they feel like they're going backwards instead of forwards, both of them relearning how to be okay with voicing their discontents with each other once again, but slowly, slowly it does get easier.

It's not until a few weeks after they start dating again that they try to have sex, and the first time is honestly a bit of a disaster. they fall back into their bad communication habits, tired from all the effort it's taken to rebuild their relationship thus far, confident that all the work they put into discussing their sex life before their falling out will hold up now, and above all, so so desperate to touch one other like this after so long without, desperate for the sex to just work that they both jump in headfirst.

steve is the one who offers to take things a little bit rougher, asking tony if that's what he wants tonight, and he steadfastly pushes down on the panicked voice inside his head that insists he'd actually rather die than hurt tony in any way ever again and he takes deep breaths to try and slow the way his heart races in fear at the thought of seeing tony beneath him, face twisted in pain. he offers because he thinks that his own trauma doesn't matter, if it means giving tony something he likes again.

tony is the one who accepts, his enthusiasm a little too loud, a little too forced when he immediately says yes. he says yes, and he tries in vain to remind himself of all the things he taught steve so long ago, that it's not about pain or punishment or revenge, that steve is doing this to him because this is what trust looks like, remember tony? he accepts because he thinks he would be admitting fault, admitting weakness if he confesses that he doesn't want to experience love like this, not anymore.

they don't actually get very far that night, both of their facades crumbling under the emotional intensity of it all, but they make it through the resulting hurt and panic and guilt together, wrapped up in each other's arms with reassurances of love and promises that the next time will be gentler, as gentle as they can be for each other.

[adirtnap]

game tier list twenty twenty two

2022 was the year of every video game being five or more video games at the same time. games were deckbuilding AND basebuilding AND roguelite AND fishing AND farmingsims. i don't think this worked out TOO well but i can see the appeal and i hope we can make a good one sometime!

game of the year 2022:

celeste!! the best and only video game. video, space, game. this is the peak of the genre, which is understandable because it is also the only game that exists.

it's just so FUN. like, first i play celeste as a vocation AND THEN when i'm exhausted i turn off celeste, sit for a sec, and think, "ah, time for some light fun. let's play a bit of celeste."

S tier (video games of all time)

mm rando ("Legend of Zelda Majora's Mask Randomizer, allsanity settings") this shit is so fun?? it's so fun. i will play this every year

inscryption ohhhhh man did someone have fun making this game and it SHOWS. some guy that i bet really likes and appreciates magic the gathering made a video game about: what if you played magic the gathering and it mattered SO MUCH. what if everything in your world was to enable you having a good and terrible time playing (original and realllly well-designed?) trading card games. and he was RIGHT and i had a good and terrible time

dwarf fortress!!! i first played dorf fort in 2012. i learned to play it alongside a guy i'd just met on study abroad because we were bored nerds. he is now my best friend. i have loved this game for TEN YEARS!! i once met derek yu (spelunky etcetera) at a very nice party and extremely embarrassingly trapped him in a conversation so i could talk about how good dwarf fortress is. he was very gracious and understandably uncomfortable. i like this game a LOT a lot. but, for every year i've loved dorf fort, i haven't really been able to recommend it to anyone. "hey, do you want to play a game that is so fucking hard and annoying to learn?" the answer is not usually "oh yeah for sure"

everything about the new UI-remake is good. they took the "impossible to learn" out of the sentence that i have so many times said, "this game is brilliant and enchanting and also impossible to learn." (the game is now fully "and also.") they did a good one.

A tier (delightful games)

elden ring my computer was too sad to keep playing this, and i am sad about that. it was GREAT, everything about it was as delightful as the darksoul and more. i can't wait to finish it (and probably give it s-tier) when computer good

fortnite they finally made a good battle royale and it is fortnite. good job i like my friends and this game is what i did with them a lot.

super mario sunshine perfect nintendo-y game. filled with little guys of all kinds. i will play this every year

the barnacle goose experiment horror abiogenesis autoclicker!!

sayonara wild hearts GOOOOD soundtrack good game

B tier (really fun games)

vampire survivors this is the most video game ever. i've heard it described as "the best video game of 2003." i've also heard the developer used to program gambling-machine animations. i would have played this on the school bus on the way to highschool. it rules

neon white really fun, zøooomy. i don't have the patience to find microoptimizations in levels to beat my friends, but DANG is playing each level for the first time fun. the writing was cringe AND free, it made me smile

C tier (games i liked)

citizen sleeper to paraphrase shannon: a dnd-videogame except for friends at the table enjoyers. i really liked that every choice felt limited but intentional, rather than disco's fuck-you kinda dice rolls. but, the sell was: "things… are happening. hmmmm what could they be?" which was not strong enough to keep me deeply invested. i'll keep going back and playing little by little

helltaker it's like eight minutes long and it's full of newgrounds drawings of demongirls. it's not a good game. i liked it a lot

D tier (games i did not like)

loop hero. backpack hero. slice and dice. dicey dungeons these are all the same game and they are all different variations of boring

cult of the lamb ANOTHER five-games-in-one that added up to… one-half of a good game? the fighting is like worse hades, the farming sim is like worse dontstarve. the minigames are ok. it was fine

subnautica LOVE a shark! but the game was brought down by the "you have to find a tiny item in a huge ocean and if you do not you cannot progress or you will miss major parts of the story" and also "find that tiny item on a short clock with constant danger." i ended up using the wiki, and shortly after ended up reading the plot because that was more fun than playing the lategame

however, many good moments of "oh wow yikes that's a fuckoff big shark huh" which i DID enjoy

death's door not a bad time but not for me. i think i'd rather play tunic (i haven't played tunic)

F tier (i hate it)

deathloop THEY BIOSHOCK-POISONED THIS GAME SO BAD

the concept of a majora's-mask-plus-dishonored-problem-solving-shooter? quite good. this game? really sucks. this game is the sum of every boring-but-sells lesson internalized by marketing departments on the success of "the genius of environmental storytelling," but instead of genuinely funny bits (like left4dead2's graffiti!), they went for an utterly bland "THIS UTOPIA? DIDN'T WORK OUT HUH"

also the core mechanic just wasn't very fun, was it, it just didn't work. they made it a pretty good fps and also a ~nothing else~

the upside was the art direction which: was good enough to do environmental storytelling with! it makes me mad that some goooood art got wasted on this game

hon. mentions

madness in square garden, for having a good name watching someone else play outer wilds

[iloveabunchofgames]

#JakeReviewsItch

After the first station

by Lsgamedev

Price (US): $5.00 (But it seems to be on a permanent 100%-off sale.)

Included In: Not in any bundles

Genre: Adventure

Pitch: Hop aboard a train that literally and metaphorically takes a Japanese high school student out of her small town and into the challenges and isolation of adulthood.

My expectations: Looks like a walking sim. The screenshots don't suggest much interactivity, nor do they show any text. I love when a mellow game lets me inhabit a space. A lot games do that and also have other, video game-y stuff, so unless they really have something to say, pure walking sims usually strike me as unambitious and pretentious. But I'm not even sure if that's the genre. The visuals are pretty. Everything else on developer Li Sheng's Itch profile page is a horror game, so maybe After the first station isn't really as cheery as it looks. My curiosity is piqued.

Review:

I’m in a school. I enter a classroom. There’s nothing of interest inside. I walk to the another classroom. It’s not my class. I try another. It’s not my class. I try another door, and it opens! This must be my class.

Class is not in session, but something is happening here. There are glowing circles on the floor, and they are freaking out. Should I stand on them? Do I need to walk along them in a certain order? Or are the circles, which are jumping around to ten different places at once, meant to draw my attention to the conspicuous box on the teacher’s desk?

I approach and see a button prompt. I can rotate the box, but how do I open it? I can move a cursor over the latch, but I’m pressing every button and nothing’s happening. Ohhhhh… I have to put the cursor on the lid, and then…rotate the lid?

I get a key, which opens the library, where I find a camera, which I place on a scale, which gives me a train ticket, which takes me away from the first level. Thus concludes the best part of After the first station.

+ Solid framerate at max settings. ("Meets expectations" shouldn't be cause for celebration, but I've played a lot of primitive-looking Itch games with terrible performance lately.) + It seems like a very personal story. As laughable as the end product is, I hope its development was therapeutic. If making games helps you process trauma, you have my full support. If you release those games to the public, though, I'm not going to hold back on what I think of the full product. And on that note... + Unintentional comedy is still comedy. This game is a riot.

– The Itch page lists, "Atmospheric and appealing graphics" and "Amazing and magical landscape to explore" as key features. The landscapes are a handful of assets copied and pasted at random a thousand times. I don't think I ever went a full minute without finding a new visual bug. Yes, "amazing" is exactly the word. I was in disbelief the whole time. – According to a YouTube walkthrough, I quit a little more than halfway through the game. I consulted a walkthrough because I was sure I had completed my objectives, but nothing was happening. As suspected, I'd hit a game-breaking bug and couldn't proceed. Awesome. – A full sprint in this game is more like a leisurely stroll—especially obnoxious since most levels are either about collecting glowing trinkets in huge, vacant, repetitive areas or walking straight ahead along huge, vacant, repetitive paths. How nice it is to slow down and take in all the nothing. – Sometimes you get Xbox button prompts. Sometime you get PlayStation. Sometimes moves like leaning to the side, zooming the view, or rearranging the inventory—useless vestiges of whatever template is driving this thing—simply stop working.

🧡🧡🤍🤍🤍

Bottom Line: If you're a streamer or you like to gather with friends to watch each other play single-player games, grab After the first station while it's free. You'll have no trouble finding material for your quips and zingers. If you're playing alone, or if you're looking for a real game, don't bother.

#JakeReviewsTwitch is a series of daily game reviews. You can learn more here. You can also browse past reviews...

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[dewdrop-writes]

yk how venti/raiden are always depicted as the “villains” who abuse reader and realize their mistakes?

well, it’s about fucking time we switch it up!

can i request an Imposter!Reader AU where Venti is the one that provides his Creator with refuge?

please my boy is vv underrated and he needs some love too <3

The caress of freedom

OHHHHH I AGREE!! Venti is very sweet - so I totally see the appeal of making him cruel in the sagau (I have contributed too), but him being on the reader's side? Underrated trope I love <3 He DOES deserve some love! I've written a lot about Zhongli being the soft savior, so I haven't gotten much of a chance to explore Venti in that position myself - I hope I did him justice!

cw: Brief mention of injury

Length: 3.8 k

Mondstadt was considered the city of freedom, above all. A nation much less complicated in its existence than Liyue, the capital of commerce, or the perpetually turbulent land of supposed eternity.

Barbatos, or Venti, as he went by now, had fought hard to ensure that freedom for his people - to end the tyrannical rule of Decarbian and allow the winds of freedom to soar through the lands.

Yes, perhaps he was considered the weakest of the seven, for refusing to govern over his nation directly, but if weakness was thriving off of the joyous and carefree desires of his people - he'd gladly accept the title.

His bond with you - the almighty Creator was strong, as he had lived for many long centuries - all the while sensing your gentle and guiding presence leading him like a gust of wind.

His ballads focused mainly on human joys, freedom - and of course, you.

You - he could sing for decades more to come and never run out of inspiration when it came to you.

You guided the little wisp of a being he had been towards his future as an archon. You ignited in his dear friend's heart - leading him towards the rebellion.

You.

He was devoted to you more than anything else in the world.

You had admired this shiny new game - with beautiful soundtracks, compelling storylines, characters and fun gameplay.

You had spent hours playing it, farming for your favorite characters and progressing.

And you certainly had never imagined finding yourself in Teyvat one day.

And yet- you had awoken to sights never before seen by the human eye.

You had been confused, of course. Waking up in Inazuma - the area you had been exploring when you last played the game. Not really knowing what else to do, you had headed into the city.

Bad move.

Barely escaping the rage of the citizens egged on by the Raiden herself, you were left to dodge the furious bolts of lightning chasing after you.

By the time you reached Liyue, managing to hide aboard ships and slip out into the harbor - the news had already spread from Inazuma. Everyone was out to get you.

Including the Qixing and the previous Archon himself.

You barely managed to escape the boarders of Liyue with your life - powerful adepti and humans alike chasing after your trail.

By the time you finally reached the lands of Mondstadt, you were a mess. Injured - cold and filthy.

And jaded.

You had no desire to attempt at breaching the walls of Mondstadt. You would be better off in the wilderness, until the people inevitably find out that you are in their nation. You hoped you could rest for a few days, at the very least.

Your few days of peace, surprisingly stretched out to even more days - until it had been a week - then another few. All spent out in the wilderness, scavenging any food you could get your hands on through the surprisingly helpful hilichurls.

Still, the time eventually came, when you could no longer avoid entering the city.

A quick get in, get out plan.

Or not.

The sun beamed down happily upon the lively city of Mondstadt. Merchants were cheerfully promoting their product - the adventurers guild looked for new recruits, and people with the day off wondered the city aimlessly, enjoying the melodic tunes in the town square, played by none other than their disguised archon.

Recently he'd been sensing the creator's presence stronger than ever - after losing them from his thoughts, he'd been more than concerned, but now, as the winds itself whispered and sung to him about the arrival of the Creator - he knew it was only a matter of time until they met once more, this time in person - at last.

His fingers strummed the strings of his lyre with ease, his mind automatically wiring itself to sing of his beloved creator.

His words were gentle, yet loud and enticing for all to hear. The emotion - the yearning and excitement - it infected onlookers as he allowed himself to get lost in the music. Gentle breezes played with his hair like loving hands, tugged at and ruffled his clothes and he felt joy.

You wander the streets in silence, a raggedy cloak covering your form, the baggy hood mostly shading your face.

You could do this.

Your fist clenched the few mora you'd managed to collect, digging through the dirt of abandoned campsites and worn-down chests.

You took in a shake breath as you approached the grocer, hoping to make the transaction quick and simple.

Your whole body was tense - well aware of the archon in disguise strumming away at his lyre without a care in the world. You supposed you should be thankful he was much less vigilant than the other two you'd previously been subjected to.

"Hello! How may I help you?" Blanche asked you with a cheery voice, a wide smile plastered upon her face.

You gulped.

"Could I get..." your eyes grazed over the items on display.

"A couple of potatoes?" you asked, keeping your voice quiet, yet strained, as you avoided meeting her eyes.

She smiled and grabbed a couple.

It wasn't much, but you could no longer find any in the campsites you'd scoured, and it was nutritional, at the very least.

"That'll be 240 mora," she said with an upbeat voice.

You bit your lip.

"Make it one, then," you whispered, feeling tears prickling in your eyes.

You still needed to buy some medicine, after all - you were sure you'd caught a cold spending the nights on moist grass, winds cutting through your light clothes.

She nodded sympathetically, and you finished your transaction.

This had been much easier when you had a steady income of commissions and boss fights, you mused.

Just as you passed through the town square, ready to head to the florist, you managed to catch your foot on one of the rocks embedded into the cobbled ground.

With a soft yelp, you tumbled onto the ground, your hood slipping off your head and your newly made purchase escaping your grasp along with your leftover mora.

You could feel your throat closing up as tears began to form - but you desperately began to snatch up your belongings, hoping you could go unnoticed in the ground.

You could not.

You had been too preoccupied with your thoughts to notice that the lyre had stopped releasing its melodic chords.

"Here, let me help!" you heard a soft, almost boyish voice declare, as a gust of wind washed over you.

You stopped in your tracks, feeling a sudden chill run across your spine.

Venti.

Slowly, your gaze shifted upwards, meeting his wide, aquamarine eyes.

For a moment, time stood still.

"Your...Grace..." he whispered, his voice oozing of disbelief and bewilderment.

"I swear I'm not-" you paused. "Huh?"

He grinned as he reached out a hand for you, beaming with delight as a warm breeze surrounded you.

Shakily, you took it, and allowed him to pull you to your feet.

"How come you're dressed in rags like this?" he asked, frowning as he gently wiped off dust from your shabby cloak.

You failed to find the words to answer, instead glancing around at the crowd that had suddenly fallen silent.

As you feared, all eyes were on you following Venti's sudden outburst.

Venti, seeming to notice the direction of your gaze, let out an awkward chuckle.

"Mondstadt! The Creator has decided to grace our Nation with their presence!" he exclaimed, his glee summoning forth eager gusts of wind that scattered around beautiful flower petals and floral scents imbued with joy.

The crowd cheered.

You wondered if you were dreaming.

"Let's get you to the knights' headquarters, your Grace," Venti spoke as he ever so gently took your hand in his - his skin so soft and unmarred compared to the calloused and dirty ones of yours.

You could only nod shakily, afraid of any reaction that rejecting might draw out of the Archon. Yes, he was sweet - but he was still powerful.

He lead you through the streets of Mondstadt proudly, beaming with delight.

You were truly in Teyvat.

Your hand was in his - skin against skin.

No longer were you a distant force guiding his actions or hovering around the traveler - this time it was truly you.

His cape flowed cheerfully in the wind, trailing behind him as he skipped along - eager to give you a welcome truly worthy of the god you were.

You allowed yourself to be dragged into the knights' headquarters, your eyes frantically scanning your surroundings as you took in the all too familiar sights you'd experienced through other characters.

You were well aware where he was taking you, by the time he paused at a door.

To the Acting Grand Master.

To Jean.

The air in the room was chilly - the stone walls harboring an eternal coldness that seeped out from every pore and crack. The room was beautiful, decorated with many antiques and expensive books lining the walls.

Large, looming windows that allowed the sunlight to pour in, lighting the office and giving it a warmer, more welcoming glow.

You gulped as you stared at the tall blonde sat at her desk.

Her gaze shifted upwards at the sound of her door opening - ever vigilant and ready to assist despite the burden it placed on her much too young shoulders.

A quiet gasp escaped her lips, barely audible to you - but you could see shock setting onto her features, her eyes wide as she took in the sight of you and Venti.

She was quick to her feet.

Venti's hand released yours gently and you felt your knees wobble beneath your frame, threatening to give in as the woman approached slowly.

"Your...your..." her eyes darted to Venti - questioning.

He nodded with certainty.

Jean heaved a shaky breath - and in a graceful swoop, she was on one knee before you, her hand upon her heart as she bowed. A true vision of a knight worthy of her title.

"Your grace." she spoke, addressing you just as formally as Venti had. Speaking of whom - he was quick to take a position mirroring Jean's - a gleeful grin still stretched across his lips.

Jean approached you gently.

"I would have never thought I'd live to see this day," she spoke, her voice proud, yet quivering with an edge of excitement, it seemed like.

Your wide eyes met hers - uncertainty.

Fear.

Worry.

Yet her gaze held none of the malice of the people of Inazuma - none of the accusations of Liyue.

Were you truly safe?

"I...will you hurt me?" you asked, taking a step backwards - a precaution ingrained into your system since your first day in Teyvat. You could breathe knowing the door behind you was unlocked, at the very least.

But how far could you truly get in your weakened state?

"Hurt?"

It was Venti who spoke this time. He sounded confused, his brows furrowed as he studied your covered form.

"Why would we want to hurt you, your Grace?" he asked, taking a step closer.

You flinched.

He froze in his tracks.

"Has...has someone hurt you?" his voice was lower now, the childlike wander wiped away by the very winds he held command over.

You nodded, hesitantly.

Wild winds raged outside the walls of Mondstadt - angry, cold, harsh - unforgiving and relentless.

In the safe walls of the Knights' headquarters, you were tucked under the softest - warmest covers in a large plush bed. The grime - washed off - and your injuries treated to by Barbara herself.

Heat pooled into the cold stone walls from the lit fire roaring in the fireplace - the soft scents of burning wood and delicacies prepared just for you hovering in the air.

You could barely think, barely feel in that moment. Your mind was blank. And heavy - sudden changes leaping out at you from every corner.

Sudden kindness without ulterior motives.

It left you exhausted.

And finally - you slept.

"This is unacceptable behavior on the part of Liyue and Inazuma. We cannot allow this to go unpunished!'

Jean's voice dripped with raw emotion as she paced her office, running her hands through her hair desperately, trying to find something to cling to.

She was not quick to anger - but here she was - her most trusted citizens and Barbatos himself surrounding her as she allowed herself to ignite.

"I know," Venti spoke - sounding less energetic than usual, his tone laced with contemplation.

"I know Morax and Ei are not the gentlest - but both of them have worshipped the Creator nonetheless."

"Then how could they call them an imposter? And send down a hoard of pursuers to hurt them?" Kaeya spoke up, his usual coolness shrugged off in this heated moment. If there was anyone worth unmasking his true self for - it was you.

Jean took a deep breath. We will need to deal with the other nations - but first, the Creator needs rest. And safety." She stated.

"And we must be able to provide that for them."

Murmurs of agreement rang through the office, the figures barely lit by the setting sun casting its last rays of light through the windows opposing them.

Your safety was first.

Justice could wait a little.

When you first awoke - all you could feel was warmth. Warmth, flooded by a wave of confusion. Confusion trickling away into remembering.

Your fingers delicately gripped the edge of your covers, lifting them up to peek at your body - bandages wrapped around the worse injuries, fading scars over smaller ones.

You let out a breathy, disbelieving laugh - more of an exhale than anything - as you saw your newfound luxurious surroundings.

The heavy wooden door was knocked upon. You were quick to draw the covers up to your shin, still clutching onto the edge of them for some semblence of safety.

"Y..Yes?" you asked, your voice small and uneven as you eyed the door.

Would the person behind it ambush you?

You gulped as it creaked open.

Venti was quick to surge in-holding a tray in his arms.

"Good morning, your Grace!"

You stared at him - his cheerful demeanor instantly lighting up the room.

"Morning, Venti."

He skipped over and placed the tray next to your bedside table delicately, barely making a sound in doing so. A plate with steaming pancakes and a cup of what seemed to be tea stood upon the silver material, wafting new appetizing scents through the room.

You glanced at the archon.

"I got you breakfast! I can get you something else if you'd like though, your Grace," he beamed, kneeling on the hard wooden floor beside your bed.

You managed a half-hearted smile.

"Thank you," you spoke, reaching for the plate with a shaky hand.

"How did you sleep?"

You sighed, taking a bite as you pondered over your response.

"Better than ever," you admitted sheepishly, "beats sleeping on damp moss."

Venti's brows furrowed.

"I'm glad that you slept well, at the very least," he sighed, leaning onto the edge of your bed with his propped elbows as his gaze drifted to the windows.

"How are your injuries?"

"Much better - thanks to Barbara," you smiled. "I'll need to thank her properly later."

Venti heaved a sigh of relief.

Proudness swelled in his chest. His people could help you. Help keep you safe and happy.

"That's good," he chirped, turning his aquamarine eyes onto you once more, a childlike glimmer of joy swirling in them.

You finished your breakfast in mostly silence - Venti occasionally asking you simple questions, and you giving him sparse-worded answers.

Once finished, Venti gathered up the dishes and bowed.

"I'll be back to check on you soon!"

Days passed by quickly - and soon you were feeling good as new once more. The city celebrated your return - your recovery - everything about you, it felt like.

You were constantly surrounded by eager companions - knights and the like - who swore to protect you.

That being said - after that much time alone - it felt suffocating to be doted on so much.

So, you seeked out temporary escapes - finding corners in the knights headquarters where you could have time and space to breathe.

You appreciated all the people did for you - how could you not? But sometimes, you needed to escape into yourself and handle the overwhelming emotions of your troubled times in Teyvat by yourself.

The gentle breeze caressed your hair as you sat on the rooftop of the knights' quarters, your gaze looking off into the distance - watching the trees sway in a gentle dance with the wind. Occasional leaves landed beside you as the gusts of air brought them to you in what almost felt like an offering.

You huffed in amusement as the comparison came to mind, gently picking up one of the leaves between your thumb and index, holding it by the stem as you watched it sway in your hand.

You sighed.

"Your Grace!"

You flinched, dropping the leaf and watching it flutter down to the ground far below as you allowed the sudden intrusion to frighten you.

You turned your head towards the direction of the sound, sighing in relief in seeing it was just Venti.

You smiled awkwardly.

"Hey, Venti."

He allowed a breeze to carry him forward, landing next to you just as delicately as the leaf had earlier, barely making a sound as his foot made contact with the surface.

"What are you doing up here all alone?" he asked, taking a seat beside you, his face scrunching up into a frown.

You shrugged.

"Thinking."

"About?"

"Everything, I guess. I needed a break from the knights," you sighed, dragging your hands across your face in exhaustion as you leaned backwards, supporting yourself with your elbows.

Venti hummed in understanding.

"Are you thinking about...what happened to you?" he asked carefully.

You were silent for a moment, before nodding.

Venti felt his usual calm demeanor threatening to crack - they had yet to punish those that had dared to hurt you, after all. The topic was sensitive and you were clearly not fond of talking about it.

It was a familiar feeling to him.

"Well...if you'd like to get away from the city for a bit - I could take you someplace special," he offered, smiling earnestly.

You raised a brow.

"Without the knights?"

"Yep! Just us!"

You hummed.

"Alright," you agreed, your voice becoming cheerier than before.

Venti grinned and rose to his feet - holding out his soft hand for you to take.

When you did - skin making contact with his - you felt a strong gust of wind swirling around the two of you - your lips parting in awe as it lifted you up.

"The perks of being the Archon of Anemo," Venti grinned as your clothes fluttered in the wind - a childlike grin of your own now plastered upon your face.

"This is...wow..." you managed to gasp out.

Venti giggled.

"This is only the start!"

Your heart soared as the winds carried you above the city of Mondstadt, watching houses and people grow smaller with a bewildered lopsided grin.

Venti grinned as he watched you enjoying yourself. Allowing yourself to be freed from your worries, if only for a short time.

You landed softly upon Starsnatch cliff - your feet making contact with the soft grass with a faint thud.

Venti was quick to land beside you - his cape fluttering behind him while the winds dispersed.

"That was...amazing," you managed to whisper, not minding the mess it had made of your hair and clothes. Elation bloomed within you, whisking away all other worries.

"Anything for you, your Grace," Venti grinned and removed his hat, swooping down into a bow.

You giggled.

"I've always wanted to fly."

His wide smile was almost blinding.

"Just let me know whenever you want a repeat!'

You laughed as you allowed yourself to gaze at the grassy planes surrounding you with an awed expression.

It was so beautiful in person.

You wandered across the cliff happily with Venti - telling him about the happier moments of your past - of your life before Teyvat. Venti listened with devotion, eagerly drinking in every one of your words as though they were his favorite wine.

Even more addicting than the alcoholic substance.

He picked Cecilias gleefully, weaving them into a lovely crown skillfully as you talked - allowing your fears and worries to melt away into the depths of your mind for now.

Later - as you sat upon the edge of the cliff - your legs dangling off it - Venti reached out gently.

"For you, your Grace," he spoke, placing the crown of flowers upon your head. You smiled bashfully, leaning into his touch.

You looked more divine than ever - the white stars weaved into a crown to adorn your head.

He sighed happily, and reached for his Lyre.

Without even thinking, his nimble fingers were already plucking at the chords, a familiar tune washing over you as you watched the sun dipping behind the horizon slowly, painting the sky a mixture of golds as though it was but a mere canvas - the colors bleeding into each other freely and staining the clouds.

You felt free in that moment.

"Thank you, Venti."

He smiled as he set his lyre down.

"For what?"

"For everything," you sighed as you allowed yourself to fall backwards, back making impact with the ground.

Venti huffed a soft chuckle and joined you.

"You made me believe in freedom again. You're truly worthy of your title as the Archon of freedom," you mused, turning to your side to face him.

He rolled over to face you in turn, his grin falling into a soft, adoring smile as his eyes crinkled.

"You're far too kind, your Grace."

You smiled, a bittersweet taste on your tongue.

"I'm just telling the truth."

Your hand slowly reached out, your pinky interlacing with his - a small, yet significant sign of trust on your part.

Venti's felt the blossoms of reverence and joy bloom in his chest as he gently squeezed your finger with his.

"I would do anything for you." He spoke, sounding uncharacteristically somber.

You sighed softly, leaning closer.

"Thank you."

As your forehead gently pressed against his, he knew he truly would do anything for you. Watching your eyes close gently as you lived in the moment, he caressed your cheek with the utmost care, taking in an excited shaky breath as you leaned into the touch.

He would make sure you're happy.

And he would make sure that the other nations would pay.

[fuwushiguro]

Can We Have Two First Times?

𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

Yuuji Itadori x f!Reader x Megumi Fushiguro

Genre: Smut Notes: They're so cute 'n needy :( Warnings: 18+, consensual encounter, virginity loss, vaginal penetration, cherry chaser reader, university AU, praise, messy kissing, clit rubbing, nipple play, sub!Megumi + sub!Yuuji (maybe idk), cuddling. Words: 1.5k

There’s something so appealing and pathetic to you about virgins. Especially boys. You could smell the purity and insecurity on Fushiguro and Itadori from miles away. You sit in front of them in class and hear what they talk about. Admittedly, Yuuji is more vulgar than Megumi. Bragging about certain girls up-skirts and camel toes he spots through the day. At most, Megumi will shrug him off but at least admit they’re pretty girls. You’d think they’d be smart enough not to talk about you, given your close proximity. And yet, Yuuji takes the bait as you sit in front of them with tight jeans and an exposing thong. It’s too much for them both. You tease them, leaning back to ask to borrow a pencil. Their faces turn bright red as they try and conceal their arousal rushing to their aching cocks.

You can’t resist them for another second.

You corner the two of them at the end of class, much to the surprise of both of them. Their expressions are almost intoxicating enough to get drunk off when you call them out for staring at your ass. Megumi was the most enjoyable to toy with, of course. You back your body up against his in a secluded corridor in the building. His rock-hard erection bulges through his jeans and prods between your ass cheeks. You think he might cum in his pants if you don’t slow down.

It only becomes worse as you pull Yuuji towards you and sandwich yourself between them. You take Megumi’s hand in yours and bring it forwards to settle on your breast. His breath feels warm on your neck as he sighs out a moan. He is so reluctant to take to opportunity you are handing him on a plate, and you didn’t have a chance to encourage him.

Yuuji isn’t about to waste his chance with you. He attached his messy lips to yours and you can’t believe how dominant it is. Drool dribbles from your lips as one tongue slides against the other. He reaches up to grasp your other breast, mumbling his gratitude against your lips. Especially since you had opted not to wear a bra. He pinches and tweaks your nipple as if it had been rehearsed in his mind since the moment he was born.

“Fushiguro, touch her properly.” Yuuji demands. He’s still reluctant to violate you, but can’t resist for another minute. He copies his friend in toying with your nipple, dick twitching in his pants as he cops a feel for the first time in his life.

“Guys,” you whisper. They can’t stop themselves now, desperate to have you right here right now in each and every way they possibly can. “Guys, not now.” you tell them. Though it falls on deaf ears yet again. You shove Yuuji away from you and move away from Megumi.

“Fuck…” Megumi mutters, clearing his throat and attempting to compose himself and reassess the situation. “Did we, uh, do something?” he asks. “Something wrong, I mean?” he continues.

“No, nothing.” you tell them both, smiling with your tongue poking out mischievously. “Text me and I’ll send you my address. I want you both to swing by my dorm room later.” you inform them as you write your number down on a little scrap of paper and hand it to the pink-haired boy.

“Your dorm? Is it so… we can…”

“Fuck? Yes. I want you both really bad, if that’s something you’d be interested in. I’d love to see you both later and take care of you guys. Or you can try and take care of me.” you joke, smirking a little at your own comment. You wave them goodbye and don’t give them a chance to answer you. You know they’ll be coming later.

The way they talk about girls, there is no way they’d waste a chance to lose their virginities.

“Ohhhhh fuck baby, jus’ like that.” Yuuji moans as you ride him. Megumi is playing with himself on the edge of the bed while your cries of pleasure are practically shaking the walls. God damn he’s big. And real thick like a fucking coke can. Each vein of his throbbing cock perfectly massages your gummy walls.

“D-Don’t cum, Megumi!” you warn him as you look over to see him furiously pumping his cock in his hand. “Wanna fuck you next, so please don’t cum.”

He stops palming himself and instead stands on his knees and cups your face in both of his hands. His lips are so soft but the kiss is so rough. It’s heated, because he’s desperate. All he can think about is feeling your pussy wrapped around him. He’s dying for Yuuji to hurry up and cum inside of you so he can have you take his cherry away, too.

“F-Fuck, Yuuji. ‘m not gonna l-last!” you warn him.

“T-Then don’t. Cum for me, rub your clit baby. Wanna see your pretty little cum face.” he explains. Your chest is heaving as you cream all over his shaft. Your walls clamping around him bring him right along with you to a crushing, erotic demise. His heavy cock spurting glob and glob of white seed into your clenching cunt. “God, thank you. Thank you so much.” you bend over to kiss him, his overstimulated moans are so sweet in your mouth.

“You’re welcome Yuuji. It’s Megumi’s turn now, okay?” you tell him.

He nods, agreeing, giving you one last kiss before he moves away from you. You force Megumi onto his back and kiss his neck and down his abdomen just for the sick thrill of watching his cock twitch.

“D’ya want me to sit on it, Megumi?” you ask him. He nods, sheepishly, despite how agonising it is as each second passes. “I think you can do a little better than that. Or do you wanna be a virgin forever?” you continue.

“N-No, I don’t. Please, fuck me. Sit on it,” he begs. You nod, agreeing. “I really want you to, ah- shiiiiit.” he groans as you sink your pussy down on his long cock. You begin to ride him, surprised as Yuuji pulls your back against his chest. Your ass cheek becoming smeared in his cum and your juices. Megumi managed to slip inside of you no problem thanks to Yuuji’s load providing the perfect lubricant for him. Yuuji’s hands are on your tits, kissing your neck and encouraging you to ride his friend just how you’d rode him.

“Gonna cum on his cock too, aren’t you babe? He deserves it, I think. Been so patient waitin’ for us to finish so he can have a turn. You need to show ‘im a good time, gorgeous.”

“I- I will. Want you to- t’cum Megumi. Wanna feel it, please.”

“S-Stop that. I wanna last longer but I won’t if you keep begging me. L-Like that.” he implores you. His face is positively flushed the brightest pink you’ve ever seen. His face is sweaty and his dark locks are sticking to his forehead. You know he’s not going to last because he’s been edging himself for so long.

“Touch her tits, Fushiguro.” Yuuji instructs, but Megumi shakes his head.

“No, I can’t. I’ll finish if I feel ‘em, I can’t.” he explains.

Yuuji picks up the slack, touching your nipples perfectly. He’s a fast learner. Picking up the intensity and pinch pattern on the hardened buds. One hand strays to rub your clit again. He never expected pussy to feel like this. Your clit is so soft and sweet and God he can’t believe the sounds you make when he touches it. It’s better than when you touch yourself. You wonder if he’d been lying about being inexperienced with girls this whole time.

He's a natural.

“FUCK,” Megumi grunts, “so fuckin’ tight.” he speaks. He drives his hips up to meet yours. Your breath stutters with each thrust as he pounds against your cervix with his enormous cock. Yuuji’s cock is hard again, leaking like a faucet all over your rear. “’m cumming, fuck! ‘m sorry…”

“’m cumming t-too! Fuck, Megumi! I—”

The three of you all moan together. Despite Yuuji not orgasming, he feels connected to you both in a way he’d never have dreamed this morning. It’s sympathetic, you think, his heavy breaths and fluttering eyelids as you experience your second high of the evening.

You’ve never felt so good. Even for a cherry chaser, you’ve certainly outdone yourself this time. Two virgins in one? It’s like you’ve hit the jackpot. You might find it hard to let these two go. Even with your cunt leaking both of their pearly, white cum, they hold you between them like you’re precious. A sweet, delicate flower. You think you might fall asleep like this. It’s so intimate. The three of you laying on your bed with not a single article of clothing on any of your bodies.

They might not be virgins anymore.

But at the very least they’ll make a good booty call.

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© 2022 fuwushiguro

[lululawrence]

do you know any good abo fics! ty

sad;gkhas;fdlksaj HELLO! i’m so so sorry i haven’t made the rec before now! but YES! i have LOTS of excellent a/b/o fics for you!

first of all, you can check out previous a/b/o fic recs i have made here: rec | rec | rec | rec | 

and i also have a masterpost of fics i’ve written that are a/b/o here

that said, last time i made an a/b/o specific fic rec was apparently about a year and a half ago, and when i checked my bookmarks for a/b/o fics i saved just since that time, i found almost 80 fics. i am NOT going to list all 80 here. lol as much as i would like to. instead i’ll share the 20 most recent fics i have bookmarked with the a/b/o tag and hope that suffices for now! You can find them all under the cut :D

A Distant Hazy Light by @greenfeelings / green_feelings - this fic blew my mind and is the first part of three she has planned and i just cannot recommend it highly enough??? the whole concept of the fic as well as the way it all unravels and various things come to light is beautiful and compelling and i adored it.

Like Candy In My Veins by @littlelouishiccups / littlelouishiccups - this is an oldie but a goodie! it was deleted a little while ago, but the author reposted it for us, which i’m very pleased about. it is such a fun fake relationship christmas fic that i’ve always enjoyed.

the way that you're thrilling me by @hereforlou / hereforlou - love me some non-traditional a/b/o pairings! this one is omega/omega and the self discovery as well as exploration with each other is just lovely. i very very much appreciated the way it was all handled and described and i am so very fond of this harry and louis hehe

don't know if i could ever go without by @lovehl / ifthat - okay this fic is so much fun, i love the world building. omegas are not equal to alphas and therefore have a hard time finding a job and louis ends up hiding he’s an omega in order to get a job at an alpha only firm. except he isn’t doing as good of a job as he thinks he is and that is just something i really really enjoy reading hahaha

I Should've Known by @28vinyl / nikogda - this is another omega/omega pairing BUT it’s a poly fic! there’s SO much pining after their alpha neighbor, liam, and he’s attracted to them too, but doesn’t thin he can do anything about it and the way the alpha and omega dynamics are played with are just... it is SO much fun. i loved this fic so much too.

First Moments of Freedom by @jaerie / jaerie - i feel like it’s a common caution i give to anyone i’m reccing jenna’s fics to, but i’ll repeat it once more: please read the tags. haha i loved this fic and as with all of hers it is so well written, but it covers some dark and triggering topics, so just please take care of yourself. if it is something you are still interested in reading after traversing the tags, then you’ll be taken on a journey, that’s for sure.

Rose Pink Omega by KatnissPotter1 - this one was a lot of fun because so much about the fic felt like a/b/o fics from 2014/2015, back when they were harder to find. it gave me such a sense of nostalgia haha! it’s omega harry and his twin alpha marcel, and omega louis is roommates and besties with harry, and then on top of all of that Louis is a camboy and it’s a uni au and... yeah. there’s just a lot all shoved together in this and it felt like a fun throwback reading it!

When Tomorrow Comes by @jacaranda-bloom / jacaranda_bloom - okay listen. i am a SUCKER for fics that focus on scenting, and this fic is such a fun way of looking at all of that, PLUS it has ALPHAS nesting!!! i’m also a sucker for nesting, but alphas??? omg i looooooved that. and the idea of soulmates all as a part of it, it just was such fun and i really loved it.

Shadows Come With The Pain That You're Running From (Love Was Something You've Never Heard Enough) by hlftanna - another secret omega fiiiic! this one is more canon compliant, but i really really love when the secrets build up to tension and misunderstandings and just really like seeing how it all plays out and comes together and seeing what all makes it fall apart and i got that in this fic so it was defo fun! hehe

Confessions of a Fabricated Alpha by @jaerie / jaerie - another secret omega fic!!! in this one louis works for a phone sex line and harry calls in to get the kind of stability he craves that he can’t get as a famous, secret omega and omgggggg the way it all unfolds is so lovely and i wanna protect and cuddle and love both of them and i told jenna that while i read it i wanted to wrap myself around harry and snarl at everyone surrounding him in the fic hahaha so yeah, it evoked a clearly emotional response in me which imo signifies an excellent fic haha

Home (It's You) by sunniskies - okay okay okay! miscommunicationnnnnn due to making a poorly timed joke with someone who misunderstands because of previous traumatic experiences? YES PLEASE. seeing them have to get past that hurdle when it happens not just once but a few times just has me all excited lol they are neighbors in this one and it’s so fun to see them interact when they are feeling awkward and gah yes love

Tastes like Strawberries by @sadaveniren / SadaVeniren - the classic i texted the wrong person kicks off this fic and i love how it turns out anyway. it’s so funny because louis just needs cuddles so so bad and harry just wants louis to have what he needs despite the fact he hardly knows him and then... well. it’s sada so if you’ve ever read any of her fics i’m sure you can imagine where it goes lol it’s wonderful, as per usual.

We Both Got Nothing to Hide by @chloehl10 / lovelarry10 - AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES!!! hahahaha seriously though, this one features pining! in the form of a SECRET NEST!!!! i just. a secret nest? so vulnerable i love it so much and don’t really know what more to say without giving plot away. secret nesting. roommates. what more do you even need?

If you let me be your man by @lightwoodsmagic / lightswoodmagic (sarah_writes) - sarah hits SO HARD with this fic and i LOVE it!!! zayn is so close to his heat that he doesn’t even realize he’s literally sniffing out an alpha based on his scent being so appealing and the way it all comes together is so so great. liam is so soft and wanting to be so good and zayn just WANTS HIM SO BAD i cannot. i cannot handle it. love.

Unplanned Circumstances by @haztobegood / haztobegood - a/b/o zouis!!! secret agent zayn! accidental pregnancy with a one night stand! ohhhhh this is so so so great and it’s once again the first part of the story! we have been promised more! i cannot wait because we have been promised a happy ending, we just don’t have it yet and i am here for it.

Promise Me You Won't Run Away by @thinlinez / thinlines - royalty au! it isn’t so much famous/non famous, but harry is just a knight and defo of lower status than prince louis, and ohhhhh!! it’s childhood friends to lovers secret relationship that also features HURT COMFORT and anticipated genders that don’t necessarily pan out and it’s just. oh goodness it is so much and i love it

i'll be by your side (anytime you're needing me) by genuinelylarry - omega/omega! friends to lovers! and they were ROOMMATES!!! featuring hurt/comfort and not wanting to overstep boundaries and not knowing about their ~preferences, and gahhhhhh the pining and longing and ahhhhh so many wonderful components all coming together in this one as well.

The Prince and the Thief by @jaerie / jaerie - an a/b/o take on tangled!!! it is even written in a way that has it read like a fairy tale. it’s so so so fun and silly and innocent while still being sexy and intense and they somehow find their way to their own happily ever after. it’s so lovely and soft and spoiled prince harry is just wonderful hahaha

Compete Against the Stars by @daggerandrose / amomentoflove - I LOVE THIS! SO MUCH! i am a sucker for a good shifter pack fic and in addition to that louis is the “rising omega” of his pack and ends up in an arranged marriage with the rising alpha from another pack and has never met him. then he goes to uni and meets harry and wants him so bad and i’m sure you can see the twist coming but how they get there?!?! is so great!!!! omg i cannot even... it’s just so so so great. i loved every second.

Dare you to move by @shining-louist / Whoopsiedaisiesss - omega activist louis! meets alpha harry at one of his marches! harry is so insecure and a blogger and louis is so strong and fierce and the way they kind of revolve around each other is so lovely. i really enjoyed seeing how louis helped harry come out of his shell and the way it came together in the end.

[totaldramafan-lauri]

Eurovision 2021 Opinions, Predictions, and Rankings

DONE.

I really cut it close this time, but I got a couple days to relax until the contest! >.<

God, I missed Eurovision so much that I think I rambled a bit too hard....XD So, if you don’t have the patience to read all of this, I don’t blame you! I mainly just make these for fun, heh....But if you do read this, PLEASE be warned that I have some very unpopular opinions this year. It’s not as bad as some other years, but there’s a few things in here that will probably confuse people. I’m not trying to piss anyone off, I’m just sharing what I think of the songs and that’s all. I can’t even vote, so.....yeah!

Also, uh....be warned for excessive gushing, because I like the VAST majority of songs this year. There are only two that I’m indifferent to, and none that I outright dislike. And even the two songs I’m indifferent to, I managed to say some good things about, so I don’t outright bash any of the songs! I’m not a critic, I’m just a big Eurovision fan being happy talking about Eurovision.

Ummmm, anything else, hmmmm.....well, the rehearsals have been done, but I don’t watch those cuz I like going in blind. I like being surprised. So, I have no idea how any of the songs will be staged, keep that in mind.

Now, I think I said everything! Into the rambling!

(In alphabetical order by country)

Song: Karma Country: Albania Thoughts: We start our list off with a song that...I wish I liked more! This song is pretty good - I like the music (though the instrumental breaks are pretty busy, with a lot of noise at once) and the vocals are excellent, but...it's a pretty standard Albanian entry in that it lacks that extra wow factor for me. In fact, when I say "standard", I mean that when I haven't heard it in a few days and I try to get in into my head, I'll sometimes confuse it with "Ktheju tokës" (their 2019 entry). And I know that isn't fair to it, but the fact that I can't make it stick in my mind really says a lot to how little of an impact it made on me in the long run. "Ktheju tokës" WAS good, and this song is good, but man do Albania really have trouble standing out in this contest (with the one HUGE exception, of course <3) Prediction: I don't think this will qualify for the final, but I wouldn't be surprised if I was proven wrong. Albania have surprised me multiple times in recent years. I kinda don't wanna be surprised this time, since it could be at the cost of a song I like more (and yeah, it probably will be), but I still wouldn't rule it out. This song does have a chance. But for now, I'll say no, it won't qualify.

Song: Technicolour Country: Australia Thoughts: Time to take off your clothes- wait, that's not it? It's "cloaks"? OK then, if you say so...Not only is this a very cool and unique song, but it's also pretty catchy! It's kinda hard to put into words how I feel about this song. When I first heard it, I liked it OK but I also feared that it would grate on me after a bit, but thankfully, it didn't! In fact, this song grew on me, just the opposite of what I thought. I enjoy this song quite a bit now! The singer's voice is really good. She has impressive range. And there's nothing else this year that sounds like this. So, while I don't love it, I definitely like and respect it! It's an impressive entry from Australia, and I'm sad that they have to preform remotely. I hope that doesn't hurt them too much...   Prediction: Oh, I wanna say they'll qualify so bad, cuz they deserve to! And even when their entries don't get love from the televote, they still get carried to the final by the juries, so....I think they might! C'mon, it's a good song and it deserves to do well! I don't even love it that much and I can still see the talent and appeal of this song, so yeah, I'm gonna say it'll qualify! The betters are underselling this! Might not do that well in the final, but eh, at least it'll be there.

Song: Amen Country: Austria Thoughts: And here we come to one of the weirder things this year: like 2015, there are two songs with the same name, leading to some confusion. I'll get to Slovenia's "Amen" way later, but for now all I'll say is that that's the one I think about more BY FAR. To the point where poor Austria here gets completely overshadowed by it. XD And that's really unfortunate, because this song is pretty good! It's very emotional, even moreso when you read that it's based on the deaths of the singer's daughter and aunt. It definitely hit me harder after I realized that it wasn't just a breakup song...and actually about death...The lyrics are also very good, especially the repeating of "Tell me, is this what you wanted?" which is a line that kinda hit me even on first listen? It just sounds so...sad, yet angry, especially with how he sings it...Though I will say that the opening lyric simply being "Amen, I guess" could be easily made fun of...but I'm not gonna do it. Not to this song. Even though it's far from one of my favorites, (and in terms of sad family songs doesn't come close to "You Let Me Walk Alone" levels), it's a good song. Prediction: I don't think Austria really have that much of a chance....but that doesn't mean they're doomed. They could touch hearts with this song, or they could be overlooked, could go either way. I personally think, um.....they won't qualify. Just cuz of the competition.

Song: Mata Hari Country: Azerbaijan Thoughts: Should I be annoyed at how blatantly Azerbaijan recycled their 2020 song? XD Well, I'm not! If anything, I find it funny that they included the line "Just like Cleopatra", which I took as full-on self awareness.....And I also don't mind because the song is awesome, so yeah. I can't help it, I'm a sucker for this stuff! I don't care how many times the song's name is yelled, it still sounds soooooo good! The instrumentals are amazing! The one before the end is easily the best part of the song. Y'know, where she just says "Let's go" and then the beat goes crazy? Perfect. This is a very solid borderline favorite for me. My only real gripe is that...uh, it's "goddess", not "godless"...I can clearly hear her pronounce an L and it bugs me. XD Prediction: In true Azerbaijan fashion, I think this'll be an easy qualifier. It's not a front-runner, but it's a very memorable song and there isn't really anything else like it in the first semifinal (maybe Israel if you squint? But that's a stretch) In the final, hmmmm....maybe it'll place in the middle somewhere? I don't think it'll do as good as "Truth" at least. That's my prediction.

Song: The Wrong Place Country: Belgium Thoughts: Not only is this a grower, but it's also the biggest grower of the bunch for me. Every year, there's that one song that I start out mostly indifferent to, that I do NOT expect to like as much as I end up liking it. The "O Jardim", the "Roi". This year, it's this one. It took me a few listens, but now I really like this song. I can't even explain why, it's just....cool! I like the dark, somber atmosphere of this song, and how it doesn't cross over into overly moody. It's just cool. And I like the lyrics, too. They flow really well, and I like how much detail there is. The whole thing just works so well....well, except for the line about the Johnny Cash t-shirt. That's just baffling. And that's the lyric they end the song with...but other than that, it's a great song that tells a story, with the atmosphere to match, and I really like it. Prediction: The only reason I'm not saying this is an easy qualifier is that the first semifinal is gonna be a bloodbath. XD I just went down the list, counting all the fan-favorites that would normally be shoo-ins, and I counted ELEVEN songs. There's GONNA be outrage that day, I just know it. Personally, I think Belgium could still do it, but it'll be really tough. I want them in the final, but my opinion doesn't matter here. Them making it will probably take a lot of effort, honestly, and...it could go either way. If I had to give an answer to what I think will happen, I'd say that they'll barely not qualify. But I'd be more than happy to be proven wrong! (As long as that doesn't mean losing Croatia in the process)

Song: Growing Up Is Getting Old Country: Bulgaria Thoughts: This one's....difficult. Not the MOST difficult song to rank (that's Cyprus), but man, it took me a while to figure out what I felt about it. In the end, I've decided that I...kinda like it. I'm putting it right at the bottom of the "like" category. Now, I know that a lot of people love this song, so just let me explain: I don't normally enjoy this kind of vocal. I didn't care for "Sebi" two years ago cuz it bored me, for example. This song at least builds a little bit, but it's not that exciting. Musically, this song doesn't do much for me, and that's why I'm ranking it so low. BUT....I love the lyrics. This is such a relatable song. Growing up does indeed get very, very, VERY old, and I worry about it all the flipping time. I do wish I could run from those worries. I like the reference to anxiety. I like lines like "Playing Tetris with my feelings, tryin' to keep them all inside". I like the switch to “Getting up is growing old”. It's really clever. Not to mention, her lethargic vocals actually FIT this subject. She's tired. So, I do appreciate this song for, well....speaking to me, even if I don't love it like so many others do. Prediction: Will definitely qualify without much issue. I can also see it doing pretty well in the final, like....Bulgaria have been in the top five twice in recent years, so this could possibly put them back up there? I personally don't think this song should be that high, but hey, this isn't about my feelings, this is my prediction. Uhhhh.....top ten.

Song: Tick-Tock Country: Croatia Thoughts: The first of my top seven favorites! Ohhhhh MAN did this song blindside me! When I first heard it, I remember the chorus letting me down! It was mostly due to not being what I expected from the pre-chorus, I guess I expected the music to burst with emotion or at least be louder.....but after only two or three listens, it grew on me completely, and I found myself trying to learn the lyrics and sing along. This is NOT another "Icebreaker", that’s for sure. I love the whole thing as it is and I wouldn't change a thing about it. This song is so! Darn! CATCHY! That chorus is incredibly infectious! Man, that beat is so flipping good! And when it switches to Croatian for a chorus, mmmmm good stuff! As someone who actually really enjoyed "Crazy", I still say this is Croatia's most solid entry since.....geez, 2010? Hope this one is more, um, successful than that one ended up being... Prediction: Oh no, oh no, oh noooooooo~....I really hope this doesn't end up underrated like Croatia's entries tend to be, but something tells me that I shouldn't be....TOO worried? ....OK, I'm still worried. XD The first semifinal is LOADED with awesome songs, so unless the staging for this is really really cool, it MIGHT struggle to stand out? Keyword being "might", cuz this is still a very good song....Maybe just being a good song will be enough! Of my two favorites in that semifinal, I'm more worried about Slovenia than Croatia, honestly. At least Croatia have an upbeat song. I'll try to be optimistic, and predict that it'll qualify. A lot of people seem to like it, so why not? However, if it doesn't qualify, I won't be too shocked....There's a lot of fan-favorites it's gonna have to compete with to get through. XD If it does make it, then I can't see it doing THAT badly in the final...

Song: El Diablo Country: Cyprus Thoughts: Hoo boy, here we go....So, this is easily the hardest song for me to rank. I'm sure that after I post this, I'll already be second-guessing my placement for it. But for now, here it goes......I love the chorus to this song just so much! It's SUCH a good thing to belt to, and I wish I could. I even love the "OooooooOOOOOOOOHHH~" after it! She has a GOOD singing voice! ...Too bad she barely uses it. Yeeaaaahhh, I'm...not very crazy about the rest of the song. The speak-singing verses, I got used to after a while, but they're still just ehhh. And the pre-chorus where she's just panting in the back with no other music? The bridge, where there's that stupid "I love El Diablo" chant that sounds like a playground taunt? Annoying. It feels like she's trying WAY too hard to be Lady Gaga, complete with throwing in words to another language for no reason other than to sound ~spicy~. As a fan of Lady Gaga, I'm sorry, but you're not doing a very good job! As I've said before, it's hard to come up with a concrete answer for how I feel about this song, because it has stuff I like AND stuff I don't like! And not only that...it's a BIG divide between the two. I don't just like the chorus, I LOVE the chorus. It's a SHORT chorus, but I love it! There are times I enjoy the song despite my complaints with it....but there are other days where I don't have enough patience to deal with stupid panting and "I lOvE eL dIaBlO", so really, I'm super torn here. I know this song's very popular, and I can see the appeal, I just wish I liked it more (especially since I've really liked the last few entries from Cyprus). Prediction: This song's currently in the top ten in the betting odds, so I think it might do a lot better than I expect. I personally don't think it's a top ten song, but it'll at least qualify for the final. And maybe do pretty well. Left side of the scoreboard, maybe? Cyprus are NOT an underrated country anymore, and the song's got a lot of energy, and it's definitely memorable, I'll give it that.

Song: omaga Country: Czech Republic Thoughts: Another song that has me conflicted, but not nearly as much as Cyprus'. My opinion on this one is a lot more simple: love the music, kinda iffy about the lyrics. This feels like it's sung by the kinda person that Destiny from Malta warns the ladies to stay away from. "You say you're still mad about the things that I did, but I don't know what I did". "Why don't you come over and have it? Why don't you let me have it?" I'm not the only one who thinks he's being really pushy, am I? I do think this song's just meant to be playful, but, uh....it doesn't come off that way to me. I mean, I guess I like the rhyming of "apocalypse" with "on my lips", that's pretty clever and I've never heard it before? But...overall, the lyrics honestly kinda creep me out. It reminds me of someone who just will not take no for an answer even when it's obvious that his presence isn't wanted because he thinks that she's just "playing hard to get". And she's not playing hard to get! He outright says that he did something to piss her off! Dude, leave her alone! Even if you're playing dumb saying you "don't know" what you did, that's not a reason to keep pestering her! ....But, *sigh* I can't be too mad at the song. When you get down to it, the most important thing in a song (especially in Eurovision) is the music, not the lyrics, and...this song sounds fantastic. It's really catchy, with a nice fun party vibe. I do enjoy listening to this when I don't think about it too hard. It's probably the most fun I've had listening to a Czech entry, so I still like it for that. This isn't a song worth being mad over. (Except the title. That title is so flipping stupid. Just say "oh my god", it's not hard. But that's a nitpick, pffff) Prediction: I kinda don't want this song to qualify since there are others in the second semifinal that I'd prefer to make it instead. Despite liking it, this is still one of my more least-favorites in that semi. XD But I still say this has a fair shot of qualifying, despite being performed early. But with the competition in the party song department by Serbia, Moldova, and San Marino, and their fairly low amount of fan attention, I'm gonna say no for this one. But I won't hate it if it qualified (as long as it doesn't push out Greece or Finland, which I don't think it will).

Song: Øve Os På Hinanden Country: Denmark Thoughts: Heck YEAH to Denmark sending a song in Danish! It's great to hear uncommon languages in Eurovision from countries that normally send songs in English! And dare I say that that's not my favorite thing about this song? Because this is another of my favorites! This song's been getting a flack for being "dated", and....yeah, maybe it is, but so what? I never claimed to have perfect taste, and I LOVE this kinda thing! 80s music is back, I say! Gosh, this song is so HAPPY! Well, uh, I can't even understand it, but it feels happy. And the instrumentation is so flipping good! The horns, the strings, UGH! I can't not smile while listening to this. If you don't like this song, that's fine, it's not for everyone...but I really appreciate Denmark for trying something different this year, especially since it turned into something that's completely to my tastes. Prediction: Yeah, uh...the odds don't look good for Denmark. Performing last, after so many people have made up their minds? With a song that's already not popular at all? Yeah....if they DO manage to qualify, I'll be VERY happy, but I don't think it's gonna happen...Man, most of my favorites are in danger this year...Eh, I'm used to it. But I'll say that they COULD possibly do it, due to nothing else sounding like them!

Song: The Lucky One Country: Estonia Thoughts: Oh look, another one of my favorites! Wow, what an emotional gut-punch this song is....these lyrics are seriously SO good. "Why'd you have to go and mess it up? Why'd you have to make what was unbreakable / Shakeable, unsaveable" "For a little while, the fates were with us / Wonder why they had to turn against us? / I could make a wish, but there is no use" "Thought I had a cloud over my head / It had to be my fault that it kept raining down, until, now, I figured out / That if I had the nerve to say goodbye, I could look for clearer skies up overhead" I....think that's enough, but holy crap, this song's mix of heartbreak and optimism is just PERFECT. "You broke my heart, but maybe that's a good thing, maybe I'm the lucky one because you're awful and I don't have to put up with it anymore." It's emotional, it's bittersweet, it's powerful...and it SOUNDS powerful too! Those quiet verses bursting into that chorus is great! This song is so flipping good! Why is it so underrated!? ...Oh yeah, cuz people who want emotion are to distracted by Switzerland's entry, I guess...or maybe it's just me, but eh. While I don't love it quite as much as my top three, this is a very solid fourth placer for me. Prediction: This song isn't qualifying, and I've accepted it. It's gotten very little attention (the music video is one of the ones under 1 million views), it was dead last in the betting odds last time I checked, and to top it off, it's being performed second in its semifinal, which won't do it any favors. I really do wish it could surprise me, but I don't think it will. I'm not getting my hopes up.

Song: Dark Side Country: Finland Thoughts: OH HECK YEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH! Finland once again appealing to my tastes! OH MY GOD do I love this song! People have been heaping praise on this song left and right, so I can't say anything that hasn't already been said....but I'll praise it anyway! This song is so flipping intense! It manages to be dark while pumping me up for action, and being the best song at doing that this year. There's not much to say about the lyrics because I BARELY pay attention to them while listening (which is pretty much the only reason this isn't my number one), my brain just turns off all analytical thinking in favor of "HOO HOO HOO HOO EVERY PSYCHO IN THE SCENE HANDS UP AND FOLLOW ME" without caring about the actual words. I just love the music and vibe so much that it pulls me in so well! It goes so hard! That great hook that starts the song off also gives the song something catchy about it, too! Also points for including the line "We don't wanna grow up", that's great too. This is a song that you put on just to pump yourself up and feel awesome. The lyrics are pretty messed up, which makes me not wanna sing them out loud, but that barely counts as a point against it. It fits with the song's tone, and just....man, I remember how blindsided I was when I first heard it. That was my first clue that this would be something special. I'm also really happy that this song is getting attention because boy is that not true for a lot of my other favorites. XD Prediction: Despite Finland being one of the most underrated countries in the contest's history, with consistently poor results despite sending good song after good song...This one got popular, and most of the attention has been positive, to the point of it being just outside the top ten in the betting odds last I checked! So, I'm gonna be cautiously optimistic here and predict that they'll qualify without much issue. They're one out of only two of my favorites (the other being Greece) that I feel like I don't have to worry about. The song does a good job of standing out, which should help it a lot. As for how it'd do in the final...well, I want it to be in the top 10, but after whatever the frick happened with "Monsters" I'm convinced that Finland HAVE to end up underrated in some way...The only thing I can really say is that it'll probably give them their best result in years (since coming 11th that one time in 2014)? But that's all I can really say.

Song: Voilà Country: France Thoughts: If I can sum up my feelings about this one in one sentence it'd be....this is the new "City Lights" for me. Y'know, the Belgian entry in 2017? Got wildly popular, but I never fully understand why? Just found it kinda boring, and was indifferent to it? Yeah, copy and paste that here. In a year occupied by some really fun, happy pop songs, some really powerful ballads, and even a couple hardcore rock songs...a song like this is one of the favorites to win. And I'm sorry, but I don't...get it? Am I stupid? (Well, you'll probably think I'm stupid once we get to my number one but-) Why are people going nuts over this? This is one of the more boring songs of the year if you ask me! But that's being too harsh, cuz I CAN see that there's talent here. The vocals are nice, and I do give it points for growing on me at least a little. At the start, this was my least-favorite, but it's not anymore. I at least appreciate it for building at lot. I almost feel myself come close to liking it toward the end, when it's at its fastest. But that still isn't enough for me to see it as the potential winner that so many people see it as. If you like it, that's great! But even though I see the talent here, I can't jump on the bandwagon. I don't dislike it in the slightest, though. I will say that I'll take another "City Lights" over another "Amar Pelos Dois" any day of the week. At least if this song wins, I can say that it won't taint my view of the whole year. I'll just be like "cool, good for them". Prediction: I'd much rather Malta or Switzerland win over this, but I still can't rule out the possibility, which just how many people love this song and are rallying behind it. I can see the juries drooling over it too. If this does win, I'll see it coming, that's for sure. The possibility over a big five country that's not Italy doing so well feels weird, I'll admit...They're usually so underrated cuz they don't have to go through a semifinal. XD But back to my prediction, ummm....it's gonna do really well, I can't deny that. But since I consider myself Team Malta (or Italy) here, I'm gonna go with my gut and say that it won't win. Top five, though.

Song: You Country: Georgia Thoughts: Meh.....this one's probably my least-favorite, but not by a LOT. In fact, I far from outright dislike it. There are times when I find it kinda relaxing to listen to. Between this and my least-favorite in 2019, I think this one's less boring, which is a good point in this year's favor! It's more like...something's gotta be in last place, and this song's still pretty boring by comparison to everything else. But it's still a simple love song that has some nice lyrics, it's not annoying, and there's nothing wrong with it...well, there's nothing wrong with the SONG, that is... Prediction: Not qualifying. Yeah, this is an easy one. XD Now, um, I haven't SEEN this, but multiple people have claimed that the singer has said some really sketch stuff, which resulted in this already forgettable song....pretty much being a guaranteed flop. Granted, the video doesn't have quite as many dislikes as others (like.....P-Poland's....I'll get to that later), but it's still got a lot. If Georgia do qualify, I can easily see people getting upset. But I don't think it's gonna happen.

Song: I Don't Feel Hate Country: Germany Thoughts: OK, so....this song. This flipping song. By all counts, I should find it annoying. I really should. It's a song that reeks of passive-aggressive, better-than-you energy and I normally hate that! No, stop acting like you're sorry for me, you condescending prick! ...But dang it, I can't be mad at this song. I just can't. It just wouldn't be Eurovision without the resident goofy joke song, and this one fits the bill. Taking this thing seriously would make me look stupid. Not only that, but...I dunno if this is just me being very easily amused, but I just find this song funny? Like, actually funny? It's made me laugh multiple times! The lines that did so being the backing vocals going "SAY WHAT? He did not just say that!" followed by "Yes I did, and I feel sorry! I don't feel hate, that's the whole point of the song!" And even the stupid thing toward the end where it goes "So you can wigglewigglewigglewiggleWIGGLEWIGGLEWIGGLE-" It just puts a big dumb smile on my face, I can't help it! And the attitude of the singer goes down a lot easier when I think of him singing this to actual hateful people who lash out with bigoted comments, so that's helped it for me. If you don't like this song, I completely understand why. It's not for everyone! But it gets a thumbs-up from me (and not a middle finger) Prediction: I...don't know how this song's gonna go over with people? Will it annoy, or will it amuse? Will it be the next "Hatrið mun sigra" or the next "Moustache"? According to the betting odds, and the fact that it's Germany, I'm leaning more towards the latter. I don't see this doing particularly well. I can see the televoters liking it more than the juries at least, but it's still gonna be towards the bottom. I do think they'll do better than last or close to last, though. This song does have a lot of personality, that's for sure!

Song: Last Dance Country: Greece Thoughts: This song is breathtaking.....as in, whenever it comes on, it makes me stim so hard that I'm literally out of breath when it ends! And that's a really....really really good thing! Dear GOD this song is so awesome! Easily a top three choice for me. I already talked about why I love it before, and everything I said then is still true. I'm ever-so-slightly biased because I love songs that make me think of scenarios, and visualize them...especially when it's of, uh....w-well, uh....ideas of the comfort ship variety....And this song makes me think of dancing with my F/O (fictional other), feeling on top of the world, but also terrified of the moment ending, as she has to leave soon, so I hold on to her, not wanting to let go, wanting to savor this feeling until the dream is over....Uh, s-sorry for getting all poetic and stuff, but....I LOVE this song even beyond that bias! Listening to it is more of a rush than the song literally named "Adrenalina". The chorus BLASTS you with so much raw energy, it really DOES make you feel like you're dancing for your life until your lungs give out! You can feel the happiness, and the desperation, just so much...Truly, "Last Dance" is the PERFECT title. The verses aren't quite as strong as the chorus, which is the ONLY reason this song isn't my number one, but that dang chorus is enough for me to fall head-over-heels in love with it anyway. EASILY the best Greek entry for many many years. They've really, truly outdone themselves. Prediction: This has gotta qualify! Even if it doesn't get the awesome staging it deserves, it's still gotta qualify! This is one of the most popular songs in the second semifinal! Well, according to the betting odds anyway.....but c'mon! My energy SHOULD go into worrying about Poland and Estonia, so let me be right about this....let Greece be a shoo-in like I'm sure they are! I dare say that this could even finish on the left side of the board in the final! Unless some other songs REALLY surprise people live, but....for now, that's my prediction and I'm sticking to it!

Song: 10 Years Country: Iceland Thoughts: I wonder how Iceland feel about being the "projected winners of 2020". XD It's kinda like being an "honorary" winner, and....yeah, this country that's never won before, but has come second twice? They could've done it finally! But it didn't happen. It's like....is it a good thing to know that, or not to? Maybe a bittersweet mix of both....but the good thing that came out of it is that their artist got to come back this year with this song. My first word to describe this song is cute. It's a very adorable idea, being thankful for your spouse of ten years, and writing a song about it....Couple goals, honestly. XD That's enough for me to like it, cuz that's just so wholesome! But this is also a fun disco song, and it definitely stands out among everything else this year. So, thumbs up to Iceland yet again! Only other thing of note for me is that when I first heard it, the line "How does he keep getting better" led me to think this song was about a gay couple, and....it's not. He wrote it for his wife. I just find it kinda funny that I misinterpreted it that way, heh....(and it's not the only song that I misinterpreted, wait till we get to Portugal) Prediction: People love this artist and people love this song. It's gonna qualify. Not a winner (unfortunately for them), but it'll still do very well.

Song: Maps Country: Ireland Thoughts: Yet another grower. This is a really fast-paced song that I imagine would make good running music, and the lyrics are pretty good! I really like the line "My soul is a map, my heart is a compass, I am the road" for some reason...dunno why, but it sticks with me. Also, can't go wrong with strong drums! I just like the mood of this song overall, too. Happy, uplifting....freeing! Gives of the feeling of an explorer setting off to parts unknown, which is something that no other song this year does. Makes it unique! Whenever this comes on, I enjoy it a lot, but I sadly can't rank it any higher. It's still definitely one of Ireland's more solid, fun entries in recent years, up there with "22". I still like "22" a bit more since it was catchier, but this song is no slouch and I wish it got more attention. Prediction: *in the tone of Deerie from Helluva Boss* Yeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh, no...Sorry, Ireland, but I think you're doomed. I really like this song and I want it to do well! Ireland have had such bad luck in the past, too! But they've got no chance in the first semifinal. A miracle would have to happen for this to qualify. It's really unfortunate...

Song: Set Me Free Country: Israel Thoughts: Pretty catchy! I like the rhyming flow of the verses a lot, even if I still can't fully understand the lyrics (which....I dunno whether to blame on her voice or me not liking the song quite enough to wanna sing along to lyrics that go by so quickly). What I could make out is well-written, though - if Estonia's entry is about the heartbreaking parts of breaking up, this song is about the liberating parts. I'm free, now I can dance! "Set me FREEEEE~!" That part is so good. Sadly, this song isn't an absolute favorite of mine...partly cuz the "Imma, imma, aaaaahhh" parts are a bit repetitive and slightly wear on me, but mostly cuz of competition. It's one out of many upbeat, catchy songs this year, and not the best of them. Prediction: Ehhhh, this can go either way. I wanna say it'll qualify, though. Israel have been on a roll in recent years, and this song is good enough to continue that. I wouldn't call it a front-runner by any means, but it'll at least make it to the final and not bomb.

Song: Zitti E Buoni Country: Italy Thoughts: With very few exceptions, rock songs tend to...not do very well in Eurovision. Even when the songs are very good, fans of the contest just don't gravitate towards rock as much as the poppier stuff, and that's fine! Everyone has different tastes in genres, and rock fans and Eurovision fans might not overlap very much. But dang it if I still don't appreciate them showing up and loving it when they do! And especially loving it when they're as good as THIS! This song is SO good! I might prefer the Finnish entry in terms of intensity, but they're not really that comparable. This still goes REALLY hard, manages to be catchy at the same time, and I love every single turn it takes. That part where he sings really really fast, and especially that awesome bridge, ugh, it's all so good! It's not a favorite of mine PURELY due to loving other songs more, but this is one I like more every single time I hear it, and I've been bumping it higher and higher up through my borderline favorites until finally giving it a solid spot. This song's been getting a lot of attention and that makes me very happy, cuz it deserves it! Italy have topped themselves yet again. Prediction: Despite being a big fan-favorite, I don't think this is a winner....mainly due to, well, being a rock song in Eurovision (I HAVE heard the very rare complaint about it, like, saying the chorus is too loud, and....it's a rock song? That's the point???), but also....it's kinda the Italian curse at this point? XD Every single time Italy have a fan-favorite song, they just barely don't win (I still haven't forgotten how much of a shoo-in they seemed to be in 2017 before....well...people lost their minds). They do however, manage top five finishes, and I think it'll be the same thing here. I would love if it won, since I like it more than the three betters' favorites, but I'm not holding my breath. XD

Song: The Moon Is Rising Country: Latvia Thoughts: MAN this song's awesome! OK, so, you might've noticed that there are a few songs this year that have the same message: "I'm a woman and awesome". There's nothing wrong with that kinda thing at all, especially when said songs are all different in their own way! This one right here stands out RIGHT off the bat with a super powerful voice that cuts through everything and commands your complete attention, and DANG does it work! The lady's voice is outstanding, and the beat's not bad either! It's kinda repetitive with the "Padada-papa-rade" parts, but that's barely a problem when the rest of the song kicks so much butt. You got something to say? Say it to her face, coward! When it comes to the "I'm a woman and awesome" songs, I like Azerbaijan's slightly more. It's more fun. But this is a very solid song that I really enjoy, and I'm happy Latvia sent another song I like this much, with one of the best voices of the year. Prediction: Sadly, for as much praise as they've been getting on YouTube, Latvia aren't getting much love from the betters, so I have no idea how they'll do. It's very split. I wanna say that they have a chance, cuz they've got a VERY strong singer and I can also see some interesting staging to go along with it, but that's just speculation. XD Also, it's Latvia. When do they ever catch a break? So....this really could go either way, and of course I'd like them to qualify, but I'm gonna say they barely won't. Not every good song can be in the final, that's the sad truth of having so many slots.

Song: Discoteque Country: Lithuania Thoughts: Dance song for introverts, let's go! This is a fun, silly song with a good beat, and lyrics that encourage having fun by yourself ("Not like that, pervert!" - Sir Pentious, Hazbin Hotel), and....that's about it! There's not that much to talk about here, cuz with this song, what you hear is what you get. And that's fine, not every song needs to be picked apart and analyzed to explain why it's enjoyable. However, despite how much I love synth music, this song doesn't really hook me as much as other songs do. I understand the appeal, I understand why it's a fan-favorite, but to me, it lacks OOMPH. Musically, it just, kinda....stagnates? With the exception of that weird scatting part. And I think my biggest issue is that the lyrics, well, uh....immediately date it to this year, let's just say. I try to get around this by calling it a dance song for introverts, and that's how I usually think of it at this point, but yeah, it's kinda still an elephant in the room. But I still do like this song, I just don't love it. I'm happy that Lithuania are getting the attention they were denied last year, though. Prediction: Despite opening the show, I think this will be an easy qualifier, one of the songs to beat. I can see this being another top ten finish for Lithuania (maybe it'll finally break "We Are The Winner"'s record from 2006? We'll just wait and see).

Song: Je Me Casse Country: Malta Thoughts: Ohhhhhh MAN do I wish I could rank this one higher. If I wanted, I could bump it up to borderline favorite, but...I already have five of those! XD But dang it, Malta, a country that's never won Eurovision, finally pulls out a fan-favorite song (again, that is *cough*theyshould'vewonin2002*cough*), and I AGREE with that! Like the Italian entry, this is a song that gets better every time I listen to it. It's SO much fun! Not to mention the singer, Destiny - MAN, what a voice! One of the best voices of the year, I'd say (though I'm not surprised, since I loved her 2020 song too). Apparently she's a former Junior Eurovision winner? I'd believe that! I can praise her and this song for so long, and it's not even one of my favorites: I love the lyrics a lot! I'm all for positive messages, and this song manages to have fun while also doing that, AND taking jabs at sexists along the way with great lines like "I'm too good to be true, but there's nothing in it for you!" and the cute "Excuse my French~!" I love the fun swing instrumentals! I love the choir during the bridge! This is just a REALLY good song that deserves all the praise, and I'm so so happy for Malta. I'd best describe this song as "'Toy', but less jokey" (well.....lyrically. Musically, they're not that much alike, but....yeah, you get it) and I like it for for that! Prediction: Could this be Malta's year? A lot of people seem to think so! And....honestly, I'm all for it! I think this could be a very worthy winner. Not to mention, that of the current top three with the betters (this, Switzerland, and France), this is easily my favorite, so....I guess that counts as me rooting for it, unless some other song pulls a Conchita and shoots up the board after being heard live. For now, I'd say this is my pick to win (although my heart is still with Italy TTvTT) At the very least, it's a shoo-in for the final, cuz this is a singer who's been in this kinda environment and will probably sound great. I'd say at least top five!

Song: SUGAR Country: Moldova Thoughts: Moldova's back at it again with their silly antics! I absolutely love "Stay", but it's pretty clear that their entries get more buzz when they're being fun and weird. This song is neither the most fun or the weirdest of this year, but I still appreciate it all the same. Apparently this is the lady who sang in "Loca"? I remember that song....I don't think many other people do. Eh, I still like it, with its catchy rhythm, and its....weird rhymes....but this song is a vast improvement! I like the fun, flirty vibe to it. Sadly, however, with how many upbeat songs there are this year, this is one that kinda fades into the background compared to its competition....well, at least to me. It's good, but not great. I remember calling it a weaker version of the Azerbaijani entry in my first impression post, and that was way too harsh, but I still wouldn't rank it high. Prediction: However, I DO think this could qualify fairly easily. In the second semifinal with most of the mid- to low-tier songs with the betters (and really only Iceland, Finland, Bulgaria, and Switzerland being the ones to beat), this is one of the ones I think has a better chance of standing out. However, I've done this with Moldova's entries WAY too often....Loving them, predicting they'll qualify, only for them not to...I don't love this one, but it could be the same story here. For now, I'm gonna predict they'll qualify, though. I have no idea how they'll do once in the final, however...

Song: Birth Of A New Age Country: The Netherlands Thoughts: What a unique song! A language we've never heard before in Eurovision, incorporating the singer's nationality and culture into a song that sounds like nothing else this year. I'm honestly a bit surprised that this song isn't getting more attention! It's not one of my favorites, but I like it quite a bit. And not just for uniqueness points (that isn't enough to make me LIKE a song, just enough for me to RESPECT it), I honestly like how it sounds. The vocals are great, the beat is catchy, and the lyrics are very well-written. What was that about host countries never trying? XD Prediction: I want this song to do well, but I don't think it will....Well, I don't think it'll flop, but it won't be near the top either. Maybe in the 10-20 range. I do think the juries will like it.

Song: Here I Stand Country: North Macedonia Thoughts: So.....I feel like I SHOULD find this song boring, since a lot of people do, but...I like it. I don't LOVE it, but I like it! The lyrics are nice and....kinda hit home for me? At least a bit. The message of "keep pushing on, no matter what happens, don't let them break you" when coming out of a bad experience....It's nice. Kinda hard to fully explain without getting personal, so I won't. Not to mention that it has a good buildup, which is what I love in my ballads. In fact, maybe it's just me, but you know what song this reminds me of? "Home". At least musically. And I liked that song too, I thought it was underrated. Also, this has nothing to do with the actual song, but the video, but....even though I HATE being reminded of last year's cancellation, I like seeing the singer's thought process when writing this song. Even if people will probably think it's a pity party, I appreciate this song a fair bit. I know I'll probably look stupid for saying I think this song is more interesting than "Proud", but eh, that's FAR from my most unpopular opinion this year, just wait.... Prediction: Considering it's this year's "Home", and "Home" was so underrated that I believe it probably wouldn't have been in the final if it wasn't from the host country....Part of me wants to say that this song's doomed. Macedonia are normally one of the unluckiest countries in this contest's history no matter how good their songs are, and having one year where the juries loved them probably won't buck that trend. A lot of people are gonna overlook this song for being a fairly standard ballad, and yeah, it kinda is. So I don't think it's gonna qualify.

Song: Fallen Angel Country: Norway Thoughts: I loved this song from the first time I heard it. It was the first song of the bunch that I memorized the lyrics to. I like singing along to it. But I was certain, like DEAD certain, that it wouldn't go above a guilty pleasure to me. At first glance, this sounds like a really cheesy boy band song from the 90s, which is why I thought people were gonna eat it alive, and I was gonna have to attempt to explain myself for liking it (like I'm gonna do for the Polish entry). I grew up with this kind of music! I like it! And it's catchy! And the lyrics are just SO good! Feeling like you're not good enough for the person you love, and thinking that there's no way they can be happy with you, are feelings I really really relate to...so it's no wonder I jumped on those lyrics and etched them into my brain as quickly as I could. Helping that is that my current crush IS female, so I can easily sing this song while thinking of her...but even with that, I was still very hesitant to rank this song super high. After all, the reasons I had for liking it were purely just bias, right? That doesn't mean it's a good song, and people are still gonna make fun of it! I can see why they'd make fun of it! ....That's what I thought, but then I saw that it was ranked highly in the betting odds. And I no longer felt like I had to regret liking it anymore. And THEN, the music video finally was released, and HOO BOY, was this song so much deeper than I (or nearly ANYONE) thought...This isn't just a love song. It's about TIX's feelings of self-loathing. About being mistreated for a disability. It was his story. I was SO shocked at how wrong I was, and now I....kinda feel bad for projecting myself into it? I still can't help it, but....no, it's not about that anymore. I love this song fully and unironically, and I will never call it cheesy again. If you don't like the sound of it, or take it at face value, that's perfectly fine. But I love it. While this doesn't QUITE break into my top seven favorites, it's a very solid eighth. Prediction: Please qualify please qualify PLEASE!! Since it's in the Bloodbath Semi and fan-favorite songs WILL be cut, I'm really really hoping for this not to be one of those. This deserves to be in the final! I'd even say that this deserves it more than Slovenia and Croatia (songs I actually like more)! B-but...ugh...I can't say for certain that it'll be safe, that's the thing...but, haaaaah, OK, I'll predict it'll qualify. I think I'm overreacting. Norway have a pretty good record. I can see the people who like this song being enough to make it do pretty well, though it's definitely not a winner.

Song: The Ride Country: Poland Thoughts: You ever have a song that you can't focus on anything during? Like, you're focusing on something else with music playing in the background, but then that one song comes on and you just HAVE to take a break so you can listen to it because it's just SO good that it steals all your attention? That's me with this song. "The Ride" is right, it IS a ride, a ride I NEVER wanna get off of. And considering the only other Eurovision songs to effect me in that way have been flipping "Time" and "You Are The Only One" ("Stones" came close to doing that too, but I could at least still play during it cuz it was such good action music), then it should come as no surprise that yes, this is my favorite song of the year. And yes, I KNOW how stupid I probably look saying that. This song has NOT been a popular choice, but to heck with it! I can't help what music I like! This song is just so flipping catchy and fun, it's got a nice beat, and I've loved it from first listen! I'm not sorry! Heck, it's even kinda atmospheric in a way, in that it's a good nightlife song, giving off the feel of an amusement park at night with all the rollercoasters lit up with LEDs as you feel the wind in your face, no cares, no worries....just turn your brain off and sing along. I even like the lyrics, particularly "It doesn't matter if I stumble and fall / I'll make it through, I'll never touch the ground". It's enjoying life, it's the feeling of flying, it's feeling on top of the world, it's escapism. Have I defended this silly song enough? Point is: I. Love. It. This is the first time a Polish entry has EVER topped my list, which by default makes it my favorite entry from them ever, and I'm happy to give them love (they've been my second-favorite twice, but one of those barely counts cuz it was in a weak year and also a song that sounded bad live, so....yeah, my former favorite Polish entry was their 1998 entry, which....didn't do well, but uh, that's then not now ^^;) Prediction: This is what I've been dreading....for a song that makes me wanna leave all my stress behind, it sure does stress me out thinking of how much HATE it's getting, oh boy oh boy! Though, from what I've picked up, MOST of the hate has come from fellow Polish people who are upset that it wasn't who they wanted as their entry? So...that's not accurate to how everyone else thinks? Well, that's what I've seen, at least....This song's still not doing very well in the betting odds, and also, being an electronic song, the possibility if it sounding worse live than in the studio is....definitely a possibility.....S-so....yeah....Sadly, as much as I love it, I can't trick myself into thinking it has a chance....It's probably not gonna qualify....If it does surprise me (which HAS happened before with favorites I thought were doomed!) I'll probably flip out!! Unlike Estonia's entry however, I don't think it's AS doomed, might stand out more, and a small part of me wants to hope...The fact that the semifinal it's in, the second, is the one with the less fan-favorites, does increase its odds ever so slightly...b-but uh, I don't wanna get too hopeful! I don't want my heart broken again like with "Look Away" two years ago (which I LEGIT thought had a chance XD)

Song: Love Is On My Side Country: Portugal Thoughts: Kay, so first, before talking about my thoughts, lemme share the hilarious misunderstanding I had about this song for the first few times I heard it: I normally don't watch the videos, I only listen to the playlist in the background as I play video games or do other stuff. Even the first time I heard the songs, I didn't watch the videos, I just had the music playing in one tab and was focusing on typing on Tumblr. And....I thought this song was sung by a woman. True story. I thought it was a woman with a very unique voice, and I was gonna praise the song for that. But nope! Took me WAY too long - about over a WEEK, the time I decided to start reading comments - for me to learn the singer's a man. OOPS. XD But at least it kinda makes sense for me to think that way? With lyrics like "I never thought I'd be queen", he's clearly telling the story of a woman. In fact, I learned that it's the true story of a woman he met (I forget the details though). So yeah, I thought that was kinda funny, but how do I actually feel about the song? Well, it's a grower! I was worried that it'd stagnate for me and I'd end up indifferent, but the unique voice combined with a subject that I normally like (staying optimistic in bad situations) won me over. I don't love it, but it's nice and has good lyrics. You really feel bad for the woman (seriously, leaving home at sixteen?) so it's effective. I wanna believe love is on my side too... Prediction: This one's tough, cuz a lot of people do love this song, and it does a good job of standing out by being the slowest song in its semifinal, I don't really think a lot of people will gravitate toward it? And that it just barely won't qualify? But it could really go either way. I'm gonna predict it won't qualify and that it'll be the "robbed" one people will be upset about in the second semi. But maybe I'm just saying that cuz that semi will already be painful for my favorites, too...and I'd prefer Poland, Denmark, or Estonia's slim SLIM chances to come through over this.

Song: Amnesia Country: Romania Thoughts: This song is just a whole mood. I could just end my thoughts with that one sentence, cuz that really just about sums it up. XD Self-love is something I've always struggled with, and I've been trying really really hard to get better at it this year. Without getting too personal, there was something that happened a few months back that made me realize just how badly my hatred for myself was effecting people around me, and that I needed to lighten the crap up before it comes off the wrong way and....I-I bring others down with me....But after all that, it was HARD. It really did feel like I.....lost myself trying to have it all. But I'm slowly learning to better myself, and this song spoke to me because of that. "If you feel what I feel, don't bring yourself down, you're not alone, not alone now". It's simple, but it works. Admittedly, I respect this song more than I like it, but I do like it. There are just a lot of songs I'd prefer to listen to. And the POV switching from first to second-person confuses me a bit (she says that YOU'RE not alone, and then that SHE lost herself, and then goes back to YOU'RE not alone? Who's the one with the amnesia?) but that's just a nitpick, and I've heard much worse English in Eurovision than that. This is still a good song with a very good message that I needed to hear. Prediction: Even in the bloodbath that will be the first semifinal, I do think this song's mostly safe? Mostly...Romania haven't had the best of luck the past 2-3 years, but their record is still mostly hits, and this song's still the favorite of people. But some favorites are gonna get snubbed, and honestly, I wouldn't mind if it's this one. There are songs I like more. But for my actual prediction, um....I think it'll qualify.

Song: Russian Woman Country: .....Russia Thoughts: This one's a grower. I can't deny its catchiness. Sometimes it's gets in my head completely randomly, particularly that slow part with the...is that a choir? Um, background singers. That part (I don't wanna butcher Russian lyrics, sorry! >.<) But, even with that, I don't fully love this song. I know it's gotten a lot of attention, but to me, it just....doesn't hit very much? I thought about it, and I came up with this: this is a song by a Russian woman, for Russian women, and ONLY Russian women. It's about how strong they are, and how they should rise up against their country's sexism and- it's all very specific to Russia? So, I can't really enjoy it as much as the people its aimed at, and that's fine, because, well, it's NOT aimed at me and I shouldn't pretend it is! I'm not even in the target audience for this whole dang contest! XD So, my opinion DOES NOT reflect what I think of the quality of the song. The song's good. It's very catchy. There's nothing wrong with it. I just can't relate to it, which make it my personal least-favorite of the "I'm a woman and awesome" songs of this year. (What happened to Little Big tho?...) Prediction: Yeah, they're gonna easily qualify, even in such a stacked semifinal they're safe. They've been shooting up the betting odds recently, so I feel like they could do very well, maybe even finish in the top ten. Russia's like Sweden in that if their entry is popular, its guaranteed a spot toward the top. XD

Song: Adrenalina Country: San Marino Thoughts: Holy CRAP is this one heck of a grower! When I first heard it, I was more confused by the sudden appearance of Flo Rida of all people to really think about if I like the song. And for a while, I didn't even think I liked the rap all that much? I do like plenty of mid-song raps, but this one I felt didn't really fit the song all that well. Like it was just pasted in there from another song entirely. But, a few listens later, and I started rapidly liking this song more and more. Fitting for its name, there's just nothing but energy here. It's a great song to put on to just....pump me up! The whole thing's just dripping with a sense of pure fun. The instrumentals are great, it just sounds so good! In terms of growers, this is a close second to the Belgian song. Also, while I'm not a huge fan of Flo Rida normally, comparing past Sanmarinese entries I will say that his rap is a LOT better than the rapping in "Who We Are" was, that's for sure! Prediction: This song doing so well in the betting odds is.....honestly amazing. XD This is the most hype San Marino's EVER gotten, which I think could qualify them for the final? But also, maybe not...with San Marino, you never know. They are helped by Flo Rida's name recognition but there's NO way he's as big in Europe as he is in America (and even in America, I haven't met that many people who are actually fans of Flo Rida), so...is it enough? I think it very well could be! It's a very good song, and Senhit's been in Eurovision before so hopefully she knows what she's doing on stage. Also, this is a song that better have cool staging with it! But for my prediction....screw it, I'm gonna predict they're gonna qualify. I even say this as I have favorites in the second semifinal that they're definitely gonna push out, but ah well...

Song: LOCO LOCO Country: Serbia Thoughts: Yet another super fun, upbeat song! And while I don't love this song as much as others (Poland's, Denmark's, and Azerbaijan's entries, even San Marino's at this point), this is still one of my more favorite of that type, and I....honestly couldn't tell you why! It has a lot of energy, but it sounds different enough to stand out. And it's catchy while not being in English! I kinda wish I could learn Serbian so I could sing along to this...XD It also grabs my attention from the very start. I dunno why, but I love that "Hur- Hur- Hur- Hurricane!" followed by the beat starting, I find it to be a cool and infectious way to pump me up for the song. Overall, one of the songs that I don't think about a lot, but when it comes on, I enjoy every second...Oh and also it has one of the most exciting key changes of this year so there's that too. Good job to Serbia! Prediction: I think this one's a fair bet to qualify! However, it's not guaranteed. They're not attracting THAT much attention in the betting odds (which surprises me a bit), but the second semifinal seems to be where MOST of the lower-ranked songs are (sadly, says the person with three favorites in it), and among those, I think Serbia will most likely make it. The song stands out a lot. So I'm gonna predict they'll qualify! But if they don't, ah well, it could be to make way for a song I like more (hopefully...I wouldn't wanna say goodbye to this song to make way for the Czech or Austrian songs), so I wouldn't mind THAT much I hope. As for the final, they're definitely not a front-runner, so I could see them ultimately stuck around the middle. Unfortunate since I like this song a lot.

Song: Amen Country: Slovenia Thoughts: Where to start with this one....This is one of my favorites, and it's in the same way as "Stay" in 2019 and "Mall" in 2018 where I have a hard time really articulating why. It's a song that makes me FEEL, and it's hard to convey that in words, so yeah! This song just....hits me so hard in the gut whenever I hear it, so I love it! It's effective at its job! Even the big thing that I thought would hold it back for me - being a religious song - didn't hurt it at all in the end. The lyrics are ambiguous enough that it doesn't JUST come off as preachy and religious and that's all. It can also be taken as a song of rising above tragedy...The most religious thing it does is mention the heavens casting you out, and that can be taken in multiple ways. But if it is meant to be religious, that's fine, I've already made the decision to love it. I'm agnostic, so I don't outright hate religious music if it's not trying to shove messages in my face. The moment I fell in love with this song was one day when I was feeling really down, was listening to the playlist to unwind, and then this song came on right after Romania's entry (which I already talked about relating to a lot). When I heard the chorus, I literally teared up. THIS is the song that made me cry this year. Not Austria's or Spain's (the songs literally about dead family members), but this one. Is that...something to be ashamed about? XD I just....really love the lyrics...."The storm's relentless, but everybody knows, everybody knows we're born to the fight"...It really just sounds so uplifting, and yes, spiritual. And even beyond that, I just like how the song sounds! I love ballads that build, and this one BUILDS, with such a soaring chorus. The vocals are outstanding, too! That's one powerful voice! I also really love how, after you think it's over, it comes back for one final chorus, that's probably one of the best parts of the song. This song makes GREAT use of the recorded backing vocals, making the choir sound absolutely massive, a lot more than it'd be live. It really makes it sound so big and grand....Uh, I've rambled about this song enough, haven't I? Uhhh, point is: This is my favorite ballad of the year and I'm not sorry. I think it's underrated as heck. Prediction: And because it's underrated as heck, and in such a packed bloodbath of a semifinal crammed full of fan-favorites battling to the death, I....don't think....it'll qualify.....I'd obviously LOVE it too, but the competition's so flipping strong, and....I-it's still just a ballad, so it's not to everyone's tastes...I-I've come to terms with that fact, and if Croatia make it, I'll try not to be too bummed when this doesn't.

Song: Voy A Quedarme Country: Spain Thoughts: At first, I was pretty indifferent to this song, but it slowly grew on me, and now I like it. It builds just enough to keep me interested. It's still low tier compared to everything else, but I can appreciate it all the same. It sounds so emotional that I went into comments to see if there was some kind of story attached to it, and, uh....let's just say that there is, and....it's depressing. But it did make me respect the song even more. There's not a lot to say here, but that doesn't mean it's bad. It's just....overshadowed, I guess. Not a standout song, but it's genuine, and I like it just fine for what it is. Prediction: Oof...Spain once again find themselves overlooked, and even though the song's fine, I can see why. I can't see this doing very well...If flipping "La Venda" ended up an underrated flop, a song like this isn't gonna get Spain outta their rut. I really do wanna see them do well! But this isn't the year for that.

Song: Voices Country: Sweden Thoughts: Dang it....they did it again. XD Part of me wanted to be bummed that we didn't get The Mamas again, cuz they would've been my favorite last year, but....Sweden know what they're doing, and what they brought us was still really, really good. Like.....REALLY good. Are the lyrics on the generic side? Ummmm.....maybe? I have said that this is a relatively "safe" entry, but that doesn't mean it's not really good. More like...there's been a lot of songs with similar lyrics in Eurovision. But that doesn't take away from the music at all, which is awesome. The chorus is nice and big, the vocals are good, and the little bagpipe bits are such a neat touch. There isn't any big standout elements to me, and it's nowhere near "Too Late For Love" level, but it's just a very solid song. And.....dare I say, better than that other popular song that mentioned a million voices. Prediction: Do I even need to say anything here? XD It's a popular song from Sweden. It's gonna qualify and place in the top ten! Done!

Song: Tout l'Univers Country: Switzerland Thoughts: Switzerland are riding the high from "She Got Me" and have once again sent a big fan-favorite song! Except this time, it's one of the predicted winners! What do I think of this? Well....it's a good song. I love powerful ballads, and this one adds drums, which I also love! But at the same time....I'm not nearly as crazy about it as other people are. Don't get me wrong, I LIKE it, but...I feel like we already got this kinda song with "Arcade"? I mean, there are differences, but its got a very similar sound with a similarly big chorus. But then again, I do think that just calling it "'Arcade' but in French" would be WAYYYY too harsh. It's not a copycat, it's very much its own thing. It just seems to be a coincidence. Also, even compared to this year's songs, I enjoy Slovenia's more? If I want a powerful song, I'd take that over this. MAYBE if I understood the lyrics, I'd like it better, but even so, this song doesn't WOW me, even if it's good. I'm happy for Switzerland, but....dang it, I can't say the O word here, cuz I hear the appeal and don't wanna come off as mean to a song I DO like aaaaaaa- Prediction: Even though it's not a personal favorite, I'm not gonna deny that this song could possibly win. I feel like the juries would adore it on top of all the attention its already getting. So, yeah, it's definitely making it to the final and doing very well. As for winning, I....honestly don't think so, but only cuz of how strong the competition is. So, I'll just say that right now, it's looking like this song will give Switzerland their best result in a long long time, doing better than "She Got Me" and (tragically) "Cool Vibes". It's obvious that in terms of how I'd rank the big favorites, I'd personally prefer Malta winning, but I would prefer this to France, so it's in the middle. But even putting my opinions aside, I really can't see it pulling off the win, at most coming really close.

Song: SHUM Country: Ukraine Thoughts: Like with Malta and San Marino's songs, this is a song that, while not a favorite, gets better and better the more I hear it. I should really think about it more often, cuz this song is REALLY cool! My first instinct was to compare it to "Fire Of Love" from two years ago (a song that wasn't popular even though this song is?) but after some time, I realized that that isn't a fair comparison. Literally the only similarity is the vocal style. Everything else is different. But man is this song fun! I could look up what the lyrics mean, but I don't really feel like the lyrics matter here as much as the music does. This song is clearly about the beat. I love synth music, and I also like bouncy stuff that I can rock along to, and this song is as bouncy as can be! The lyrics do repeat, but weirdly I don't find that repetitive at all. And once I got used to it, I started to love the speed up. It's a really exciting end to the song. Talk about going out on a....high note! Haha! S-sorry.... Prediction: Yeaaaahhhh, there's no doubt that this song's gonna do very well indeed! People love it, and for good reason! It's a sure qualifier for the final, and could very well finish in the top ten.

Song: Embers Country: United Kingdom Thoughts: And finishing off this list is yet another upbeat happy song! God, I love how many of these there are this year....This one is far from the best of its kind, but it's still a lot of fun. The vocals stand out, the lyrics are nice and uplifting, and it's definitely the UK's bounciest entry in quite a few years. It feels like finally getting that uptight friend of yours to loosen up and party, y'know? XD I don't have much to say about this song, but I do like it. Prediction: What happened to "Bigger Than Us" was unfair, both its placement in the lineup and its treatment by the televoters, and it's pretty much cemented my idea that even if the UK send one of the best songs of the year, they will NOT catch a break, and that just sucks! (well, the exception being 2011, where it was the JURIES that screwed them over instead! Still did good for their standards tho) And also, like I said, this isn't the only song like this this year, so it's bound to get overlooked in favor of more popular (and even better) party songs. I don't think it'll be LAST, but it won't do particularly well. Definitely more toward the bottom than the top.

Aaaaaaaand there we go! That's all of them! Geez, despite having less entries then the past few years, this still was a LOT of rambling....so if you skipped ahead, I totally understand why. XD But if you did read all that, I'm happy you did! But I'm also sorry, pfffff. But now, the important part, my rankings!

Favorites:

1. Poland 2. Finland 3. Greece 4. Estonia 5. Denmark 6. Slovenia 7. Croatia

Borderline Favorites:

8. Norway 9. Italy 10. Azerbaijan 11. Latvia 12. Sweden

Like:

13. Belgium 14. Malta 15. San Marino 16. Serbia 17. Ukraine 18. Iceland 19. Ireland 20. UK 21. Cyprus (today at least) 22. Australia 23. Netherlands 24. Moldova 25. Romania 26. Germany 27. North Macedonia 28. Portugal 29. Israel 30. Lithuania 31. Russia 32. Switzerland 33. Czech Republic 34. Albania 35. Austria 36. Bulgaria 37. Spain

Indifferent:

38. France 39. Georgia

[that-homoerotic-blouse]

I have several. Top 5 good memories and top 5 smells and top 5 favourite humans and top 5 aspirations xxxx

Good memories… Oh, that hits close to home, doesn’t it?

1.     There was this one day, two years ago, when I went on a small doc shoot to Nottingham with a couple of friends. They were both lovely, the bus trip through the countryside was lovely, the weather was AMAZING and we were filming on the university campus, which was gorgeous and surprisingly inhabited by colonies of geese and rabbits??? Priceless, simply priceless. We even had a bit of time after the shoot to bask in the sun. During the night we played games on my laptop, then took out a couple scripts and monologues and started acting them out and pulling out the weirdest accents (my stomach ACHED from all the laughter, I swear to god I almost passed out). I think that day I knew what was to be truly uncomplicatedly happy. Definitely one of my happiest memories.

2.     Performing at theatre school! Ohhhhh god it was the greatest feeling in the world. Seeing everyone nervous minutes before the play started, the joy of delivering your lines just the way you wanted, the harsh lights, the applause... I miss that feeling so much

3.     Watching a musical for the first time! I think the first one I ever watched was Les Mis when I was like 14, so it was a pretty grandiose climactic experience. The sheer magnitude of it, with every dancer and singer and performer! It blew me away

4.     Going apeshit at children’s playgrounds! One of these 

BITCH I LIVED FOR THAT SHIT I had the time of my life in these parks, they were like my own personal Narnia. One of my deepest longings is to go back to one of these and go absolutely wild in the ball pool

5.     Standing up on a surfboard for the first time! I love the sea, and the board really gave me a whole different perspective of it :)

Top 5 smells… Every time someone asks me about smells I descend into the pit of despair :’) My sense of smell is far from acute, and sometimes I can’t smell things unless they’re literally on my nose. I’m going to make that a top 3 cos I honestly don’t remember any other smells that appeal to me:

1.     Clean sheets! This is just the loveliest smell in the world and it fills me with such a sense of peace.

2.     Honey. I remember this from being sick at home and having tea with a spoonful of honey. It’s an abstract homey sort of smell, nice

3.     Freshly printed newspapers. Or alternatively, new books! There’s something about the smell, and also the sound, the turning the pages, the ink... I love it

Favorite humans? Oh god, that’s a tough one, is there really such a thing? Favorite humans, favorite humans… With this I can either mention the lovely people in my life or public/historical figures. Aaaand I really don’t want to tread into the tricky territory of parasocial relationships, but I think I’m going to anyway. Because there’s people whose work I admire, even if I can’t say much more about them. Sorry, this isn’t really a top 5, it’s more like a soup:

I think we can all agree that DT is a pretty lovely human. He’s probably my favorite actor of all time and although I’m not qualified to make this statement, he seems like a fairly decent person. Seeing him dork about and being adorable during interviews is *chef kiss*

There’s this model and activist, Rain Dove, who does phenomenal stuff for LGBT+ people. And then there’s loads of women writers and activists and scientists: Audre Lorde, Simone de Beauvoir, Margaret Atwood, Jane Goodall, Angela Davies, Judith Butler...

Top 5 aspirations? Hmmmm, thinking about this one makes me sad, mostly because my perspective on this matter has changed a lot in the last years, and I’ve lowered the bar—a lot. However if you ask me, ideally, in the perfect hypothetical scenario, well…

1.     Becoming an actor! That’s probably my Number One dream. I’ve always felt like there was this longing in me to have real adventures, to experience comedies and tragedies, and acting seemed to me one way to achieve that. Being on someone else’s skin, pretending to do impossible things... Don’t get me wrong, it’s a hard job, it’s the maddest job, but I’d love to do it

2.     Writing a book! Or I mean, just publishing something, you know? I’ve written a lot about my thoughts and experiences and would like to know if any of it is worth it lmao

3.     Produce/direct my own movie! I used to have so many good script ideas... lockdown has really killed my creativity

4.     Travelling! Pretty self-explanatory. I’d really like to see a bit more of planet earth :)

5.     Fostering animals! A house? Full of rescued dogs and kitties and the like? Dream life

[eddiesdiaz]

since we all Big Sad rn, how bout Sad Stiles—after fight #37 with Derek, he gives up. Humans don't belong in the pack, and he can't try anymore. He's quiet, and pulls back from the group—doesn't fight with Jackson, flirt with Lydia, laugh with Scott. Jackson walks into a wall when he throws one of his cruelest barbs at Stiles who doesn't even look up from his phone. Stiles misses the next pack meeting and Jackson feels like he's the only one who isn't relieved—and he's lost when it all sinks in.

ohhhhh man. once jackson figures it out, he starts watching carefully, intently. he sees stiles slowly but surely retreat from all of them - gradually, so as not to arouse suspicion - until his new norm for any and all pack members is not speaking to them unless spoken to (which, sadly, isn’t very often).

he still hangs out with scott sometimes, on the rare occasions he can fit him into his busy self-righteous true alpha schedule, and he reconnects with heather, his best friend from elementary school, but other than that, stiles keeps to himself. he quits the lacrosse team in favor of spending his nights in front of the tv with the sheriff when he’s home, and fighting panic attacks when he’s not. (and yes, jackson learns this by lurking outside the stilinski house on more than one occasion. whatever.)

the most fucked up part of it all is that the entire pack - every single goddamn one of them - they either don’t notice, or they don’t care. after all the times stiles has saved their asses, all the shit he went through for them without a single complaint, they just accept his absence like it’s somehow preferable. they toss him away like garbage, and it makes jackson sick and ashamed on their behalf.

he reaches out to stiles as often as he can without it being weird, considering they’ve never actually been friends. he sends him texts that typically go unanswered, has almost painfully one-sided conversations with him during passing period, asks him to hang out whenever he can come up with a reason to, but stiles always turns him down.

in the end, jackson decides to appeal to stiles’ almost compulsive need to be useful, because that’s the root of all of this, after all. so he pulls stiles aside at lunch one day and asks if he can tutor him after school.

it still takes some convincing, because stiles wouldn’t be stiles if he didn’t put up a fight, especially where jackson’s concerned.

“dude, you don’t need tutoring, you get straight a’s,” he says pointedly. jackson’s not even sure how he knows that, because he’s always played the role of the stereotypical jock who doesn’t care about his grades, but he can’t say he’s surprised.

“i did, yeah, but my gpa kind of took a dive after i spent a semester running around on a murder spree against my will.”

stiles is still looking at him skeptically. “why me? both your best friends are geniuses.”

“lydia’s condescending when she teaches, and danny’s a pushover. he lets me give up as soon as i start complaining,” jackson says with a shrug. then, to drive the point home, he adds, “look, please? i need your help.”

stiles makes him swear, three separate times, that no one else from the pack will be making an appearance before he finally agrees.

they end up with a standing study date two nights a week, at jackson’s house, because he figures stiles could use the change of scenery. he makes sure to be the perfect student, and he always thanks stiles once they’re done and politely ignores the way he gets choked up as he says “no problem.”

one night, jackson’s phone starts blowing up with some kind of pack emergency, and stiles’ tension and anxiety is physically palpable in the air as he pauses and asks “do you need to get that?”

jackson doesn’t even think about it as he says “nope,” and powers his phone off before turning his attention back to stiles. “sorry, go ahead.”

derek’s furious at him when he sees him the next day, but honestly, jackson couldn’t give less of a shit. especially when that one simple action had put stiles more at ease, visibly comforting and reassuring him. he’d even given jackson a hug on his way out the door.

after a little over a month of studying together, when he’s confident stiles trusts him enough, jackson invites him to do something else. they just finished their economics homework, and stiles is packing up his stuff when jackson asks “hey, do you wanna go see a movie or something?”

stiles’ heart stutters in his chest, and he’s smiling as he says “sure.”

it’s surprisingly easy, transitioning into being friends with stiles. he skips lacrosse practice to play with stiles instead, because with him it’s about having fun and not about having to prove he’s the best. he spends friday nights with stiles and heather, bowling or playing video games, uncaring of whatever party he’s missing. he walks out of pack meetings on a dime, no matter how “important” they are, when stiles calls or texts to ask if he’s free.

he goes from trying way too hard to make stiles scowl to trying way too hard to make him laugh. it’s a complete 180 from their relationship a year ago, but it’s nice. if jackson’s being honest, it’s as therapeutic for him as it is for stiles. because for the first time in a long time, he has something real, as opposed to some fabricated bond born out of necessity.

stiles shows up at his house one night at 2 am, and jackson can tell he’s been crying. “i need some of your rich boy liquor,” he says by way of greeting. he walks right through the door like he knows he’s always welcome, and jackson just steps aside, because he is.

it’s the first time they actually talk about it, once stiles is more than a little drunk and holding on to jackson’s hand so tight it’s like he’s afraid he’ll up and leave him if he lets go.

“it just sucks. for the first time in my life, i felt like i belonged somewhere, but i wasn’t good enough to prove it to them,” stiles says, and jackson’s stomach twists, because he understands the crippling struggle with inadequacy all too well.

“you earned your place in the pack, stilinski. it’s not your fault they all have their heads so far up their own asses that they can’t see you’re a bigger asset than any one of them.”

“that’s bullshit, jackson,” stiles says, sounding tired and resigned.

“has anyone ever told you you’re a stubborn piece of shit?” jackson asks, but there’s no heat behind it. in fact, it’s almost annoyingly fond. “i’m serious. if i could only pick one person to have my back, it’d be you, stiles.”

in two seconds flat, stiles is in his lap, kissing him hurriedly. jackson melts into it at first, because he’s far from perfect, and this is something he’s wanted to do for awhile now but avoided because he knows stiles needs a friend before anything else. stiles licks into his mouth with a dominant intensity that has jackson shivering, and he almost lets himself get lost in it.

but he pulls himself together, because stiles is drunk and jackson is stone cold sober, and he knows nothing good starts that way. so he pulls away, gives stiles a lingering kiss on the cheek, and takes him up to his bedroom. he gives him some sweats to borrow and tucks him into bed, and when stiles curls up at his side, pulling him close, jackson lets it happen. he figures stiles won’t remember any of this in the morning anyway.

as it turns out, though, stiles has a remarkably good memory of the events that took place when he was drunk. in the morning, after jackson’s given him some aspirin and drained the pain of stiles’ pounding headache, he asks, “i kissed you last night, didn’t i?”

“you did, yeah,” jackson answers, and even though he doesn’t want to, he gives stiles an out. “we can pretend it was a figment of your drunk imagination, though, if that’s what you want.”

stiles is quiet for a minute, but then he smiles almost shyly. “yeah, no thanks. now that i know i can kiss you without getting brutally rejected, i definitely wanna do it again. in fact, i’m gonna go steal your toothbrush so i can ditch the morning breath and do it again right now.”

“gross,” jackson says, but he’s grinning. he doesn’t even wait the two minutes for stiles to make it back; he meets him in the bathroom and kisses the hell out of him, because he can now.

jackson doesn’t withdraw himself from the pack completely, because he’s still new at this and he knows he’s not ready to handle being an omega, but he makes it clear to them that they aren’t where his loyalty lies. that he can’t respect a pack who treats its members like inconveniences and liabilities.

he eventually drifts away from them, just like stiles had, but he doesn’t care. when he needs help, supernatural or not, he goes to stiles, and it’s never failed him and he knows it never will. because stiles is the only person who always has his back, no matter what, and he’s all the pack jackson needs.