#and then all the networks started taking their stuff off because they didn’t want to share profit

[skzdust]

Whatever Will We Do?

THIS IS SMUT. MINORS DNI.

SOMEONE inspired this... this is very different from what we were talking about but what you said was my jumping off point.

Also finally something for Yunho!! Yay!!

This takes place in the same universe as Rock Will Never Die and Worth It, but it can be read as a standalone.

Please enjoy!

Summary: Yeosang's gone into heat, and Mingi and Yunho are going to help you through it.

Pairing: Omega!reader x omega!yeosang x alpha!mingi x alpha!yunho

Includes: omegaverse/abo, fingering, unprotected sex (pls be safe irl!!), sub Mingi bc I love himmmm, tiiiiny bit of pet play, general abo stuff ("alpha", "omega", knotting, etc)

Word count: 1.9k

Taglist (Comment on a post/send an ask if you'd like to be added): @weirdowithaphone, @caught-in-the-afterglow, @palindrome969, @skzstan12345, @katsukis1wife,

@hyunjinsjeans, @somethingkindazainy, @silverstarburst, @atzlordz

@jiminthestreets-bonesinthesheets

Network:@mirohs-aurora-society

Reblogs, likes, comments all appreciated!!!

Masterlist

-----

The house already smelled strongly of Yeosang’s heat when you walked in.

You swallowed. This hadn’t been unexpected, but heats always made you a little nervous. You had only been pack bonded with the rest of Ateez for one heat, and while it had gone well, you were still a bit anxious. You rubbed the scar on your neck before clasping your hands together.

The scent, rose and bergamot, only got stronger as you made your way towards the bedroom Yeosang liked to nest in. You could feel a thrill in your stomach— was it anxiety, or anticipation?

You knocked gently on the door. “Yeosang?”

A long whine was all the answer you got, but you twisted the knob and walked in.

The blankets and pillows had already been arranged into something of a nest, but you had the urge to go steal clothes from the other band members’ rooms so that you had all of their scents there. It would feel better, safer.

Yeosang was in the middle of it all, wearing nothing but a white sweater it seemed he’d forgotten to take off, rutting his hips against a pillow. He looked at you, his eyebrows knit together in desperation. “Y/n!”

“Yeosang.” You breathed.

You were the pack’s omegas, and between the needy whines filling the air, the nest, and the sight of Yeosang, you could feel yourself growing slick.

You groped for the doorknob. “I’m gonna go get some clothes before I go into heat… for the nest.”

Yeosang nodded vigorously. “I— I wanted to, but I— ngh, I hope one of the others is home soon.”

“Me too.” You closed the door behind you, trying to seal as much of the scent in the room as you could. But it was too little too late, and the ache between your thighs only grew as you stumbled between rooms, grabbing T-shirts and blankets and hoodies— anything that smelled like the other members.

You took your giant armful of fabric back to Yeosang’s room and didn’t even bother closing the door before starting to arrange it all into your nest. Yeosang paused for a moment to help move a few things, pulling one of Wooyoung’ sweatshirts under his head and hugging it with one arm while reaching out for you with the other.

You finished getting a blanket just right before flopping down beside Yeosang. His touch was desperate, but you moaned at how good it felt on your skin. In a moment, you were all over each other, his hands exploring your body, and yours on his.

“Touch me,” He whined, and you couldn’t resist, moving your hand down between his legs. He pushed up into you, breathing hard, soaked already, his thighs covered in slick. It was easy to slide a couple of fingers inside him.

He let out an obscene moan, his legs parting wider to give you better access. “Fuck, that feels… feels good.”

You knew he needed more, because you needed more, too. “Let me call Yunho.” You fumbled for your phone. “He’s probably on his way home by now, anyway.”

You found his contact and pressed the call button.

“Hello?”

“Yunho.” You all but whined. “Are you on your way back?”

“I’m leaving the grocery now.” A pause, a car door slamming shut. “Did someone’s heat start?”

“Yeosang first, but I’m… I’m getting there, too.”

“I’m only a few minutes away, but Mingi should be home soon, too.”

You moaned as Yeosang sank a few of his fingers into you. “Fuck, Yunho, need you.”

“Shit, y/n.” He breathed a laugh. “Is Sangie touching you?”

“Yeah.”

“Good, are you touching him?”

“Yeah.”

“Good girl.”

Yeosang looked at you with big eyes. “Can I talk to Yunho?”

You could never resist him. You set your phone between the two of you and set it to speakerphone.

“Yeosang’s here, now, too.” You said.

“Yunho, Yunho.” Yeosang chanted. “Hurry, I need your cock, need your knot…”

“You guys are going to make me break the speed limit. Believe me, I’ll be there soon.”

“Mhm.” Yeosang whined.

“I’ll be home in about fifteen, okay?”

“Okay.” You said, slightly more coherent than Yeosang. “We’ll see you.”

“See you soon.”

Yunho hung up, and you and Yeosang looked at each other for a moment.

“Think you can make it?” You asked.

“I just hope Mingi’s here sooner. Fifteen minutes is so long.” Yeosang whispered. “Can I kiss you?”

“Of course, anytime.” You leaned in.

Just like everything else Yeosang was doing right now, the kiss was desperate, needy, like he would suffocate without your mouth on his. You moaned at the pressure, at the feeling building between your legs, the goosebumps across your whole body. His fingers were still inside you, but it wasn’t enough.

You both froze as you heard the front door hinges creak open. Heavy footsteps downstairs. A pause. Slightly less heavy footsteps up the stairs. A face at the door, almost comically curious.

“Mingi!” Yeosang cried, shooting up.

Mingi looked between you and Yeosang for a moment. “Are you both in heat?”

“Blame Yeosang. He started it.”

“Mingi, be a good boy and get your cock inside me now.” Yeosang said sternly.

Mingi nodded, his eyes going big. “Yes, omega.”

You groaned at the alpha submitting to the omega. Yeosang typically was not the most dominant of the pack. That would be San or Seonghwa. But Mingi was at the bottom of the pecking order, the most submissive of the submissives, and you all knew it.

Mingi got his clothes off, and you busied yourself working them into the nest while he prepared to fuck Yeosang.

“I said now.” Yeosang said, and the slight tremor in his voice betrayed the depth of his desire.

“Yes, omega.” Mingi lined himself up with Yeosang’s entrance. He was hard, the scent of your heat in the air activating his alpha instincts.

Yeosang moaned loudly as Mingi pushed inside him. “Fuck, now fuck me like you mean it.”

Mingi whimpered, grabbing onto Yeosang’s hips and starting to pump in and out of him. You watched, transfixed, fucking yourself with your fingers at the same rate Mingi fucked Yeosang, but it wasn’t enough. You prayed that Yunho or one of the others would be back soon.

It was a few more agonizing minutes of fucking yourself while Mingi fucked Yeosang before you heard the front door open again. When Yunho opened the bedroom door, you practically pounced on him. “Yunho!”

Mingi and Yeosang paused as Yunho surveyed the room, his face inscrutable.

“Yeosang told me to, alpha, I swear!” Mingi whined. “I was just listening to him…”

Yunho fixed him with a look. “Did Yeosang tell you to stop just now?”

“No, I didn’t.” Yeosang said.

Mingi began rutting into him again with a new fervor, slick leaking out everywhere. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

Yunho smiled wryly, but didn’t say anything. He turned his attention to you. “I’ll get him back in line later. What can I do for you now, sunshine?”

“Yunho, please.” You whimpered. “Please fuck me, you know what I need.”

He laughed. “I do, baby. Why don’t you get on all fours for me?”

You got into position, looking over your shoulder at him as he got his shirt off, then his pants. You were transfixed by his body, his muscles, his cock.

He dragged his cock through the mess between your thighs. “Wow, baby, all this for me?”

“I’m in heat, will you please just hurry?” You all but sobbed.

“Okay, okay.” He pressed a kiss to your thigh, and you could feel him at your entrance.

In one push, he bottomed out inside you. Your eyes rolled back, your mouth falling open and a long moan escaping you.

“Feel that good, sunshine?” He laughed, but he was a little out of breath, too.

“Yes.” You sighed. He filled you up so well. “Can you fuck me?”

“Yeah.” He kissed your spine, and you shivered.

And then he began to fuck you, and every coherent thought left your head in a whirlwind of sensation and pleasure. You were sure his fingers were going to bruise on your waist, and you pushed back to meet his thrusts.

“So fucking good for me.” He panted. “Such a good girl, aren’t you?”

“I’m— I’m a good girl!” You said on an exhale.

“You’re so fucking good, so fucking tight— fuck, you’re perfect.”

You made a pleased hum at that, and he fucked you faster.

“Mingi, faster. Pick it up.” Yunho snapped at him.

“I’m— alpha, I’m going as fast as I can!”

“Do you really want to disappoint Sangie?”

“No! I’m sorry, I’ll go faster.”

“That’s a good pet.” Yunho paused for a second to lean over and run a hand through Mingi’s hair. “You know you’re only fucking him because he wants you to, right?”

“Yes, I do, thank you!” Mingi squeaked. “Thank you, alpha, thank you, omega! Thank you for letting me fuck you.”

You were actively being fucked, but the degradation Mingi was getting only made you wetter.

Yunho noticed. “You like it, slut?” He hissed. “You like it when Mingi gets put in his place?”

“Yeah, I do.” You whimpered.

“Do you need to be put into yours?”

“What do you think?”

Yunho paused for a second, but it was only to grab the back of your head and force it into a pillow, keeping you down while he continued to use your hole. “Sunshine, you’re mine, I get to do whatever I want with you.”

The sweet nickname combined with the ownership he had over you were almost too much. “Knot, alpha, need your knot!”

“Why is that, sunshine?” He asked, mocking indifference. “Are you about to come? Do you want me to knot you while you come?”

“Yes!” You whined. “Yes, please!”

It was only a couple more minutes before Yunho’s fingernails dug into your shoulders as he forced his knot in. You cried out, your orgasm hitting you like a freight train. “Fuck!”

He pulled you up, your back flush against his front, as he came deep inside you.

You went limp against him, breathing hard. “Jesus, Yunho, that was so good.”

He kissed your shoulder. “Yeah, I agree. Yeosang, how’s Mingi doing?”

You looked over to Yeosang, whose eyes were half-shut, his mouth open. He looked fucked-out, but he managed a moan. “Good.”

“How are you feeling, Mingi?” He crooned.

“I need to come, alpha, can I knot him? Can I come?”

“Yes, you can knot him when you come.”

“Thank you!” Mingi’s hips stuttered a few times, then he was buried to the hilt in Yeosang, and the looks on both their faces told you they’d both come.

You sighed. “Can we switch next? Wanna ride Mingi.”

Yunho laughed softly. “Well, the others might be home soon, too, and they’ll probably want turns.”

You had a full-body shiver at that thought. “I’m okay with that, too. More than okay with that, in fact. The heat will last a little while, you know.”

“Oh no.” Yunho said flatly. “Whatever will we do?”

[luciathcv]

network issues - jjk

summary: in which jungkook has been in a bad mood all day || warnings: jungkook is mad? || genre: angst, comfort, established relationship || word count: approximately 970 || a/n: based off this live

Jungkook was simply in a horrible mood today. Every little thing seemed to piss him off. Despite that, he did his best to refrain from taking it out on you. You hadn't done anything wrong, after all. In fact, there was really no reason for his bad mood today. It was just one of those days.

The house being a mess was only a contributing factor to his bad mood. He didn’t say anything about it, though. He thought it wouldn’t be fair since it was really his fault it was like this since you’d slept over at your friend’s place the previous two nights.

Despite his internal complaints to himself about it, he had no energy to clean it right now, telling himself that he’d just deal with it tomorrow.

Not only that, but he’d had to go to work earlier in the day for a meeting which was whatever to him but when he came home, the internet had been completely shit at his house. He hated when stuff like that happened and he knew it was annoying for you as well when you were home alone, bored.

“Why didn’t you tell me the network was being like this?” He simply asked, though his tone was tense, as he restarted the router.

“I figured it wasn’t that big of a deal.” You softly say, knowing he was in a bad mood, though, really, you were right.

He just groaned as he sat back on the couch and watching the router reconnect, his legs spread and his arms crossed over his chest as his tongue mindlessly prodded the inside of his cheek.

Later that night, he sat at the dining table with you after the two of you had finished dinner and he grabbed the remote, hoping to himself that there wouldn’t be a problem because all he wanted to right now was watch some TV and unwind.

Jungkook turned the TV on and you just looked at the screen as the network was once again disconnected on there.

“What is with the network today.” He complained, mainly to himself. He shook his head lightly before sighing. “What’s wrong with this house?” He asks himself in annoyance. “With how much I pay for this place…” Your boyfriend trails off.

You just look at him, biting your lip mindlessly as you watch him groan before getting up and walking around your chair, going over to the TV and playing with some buttons.

“The network, the LTE, and the internet isn’t working. Are you serious?” He said before walking back over and sitting next to you again. He started to use the remote again to try and reboot the network on the TV. “Really?” He sighed.

“It’s okay. We don’t have to watch TV.” You comment, trying to make him feel better.

“Babe,” He sighs, taking a deep breath as he holds back on taking his frustration out on you. “No. If I want to watch TV, I should be able to watch some damn TV.” Jungkook says before looking back at the TV.

He clicks on the remote a few times but nothing happens. He then lifts his arm in the air with the remote, clicking it to see if that’d help but it doesn’t.

“Now the TV isn’t working.” He sighed. “What’s wrong with this house?” He groans.

I could tell he was getting stressed as he got up again and went over to the TV, trying to press some buttons on there again but it didn’t seem to be doing much.

“What’s with you..” He said to the TV in frustration before going back over to you and sitting down again. You just watch him quietly, figuring it was best if you didn’t say anything right now.

He uses the remote a bit more but it still says it’s not connected, “It’s connected. What’s wrong with you?” He sighs out.

He attempts to reboot again but to no avail. He frowns as his clicks the remote a bit more aggressively. You put your hand on his bicep and he stops, looking over at you, feeling bad.

“I’m sorry.” He apologizes. “This is just so stupid.” He comments.

Your hand drops from his arm, falling back into your lap. “I know.” You softly agree.

“I’m done.” He says as he turns the TV off, not feeling like putting anymore energy into that right now.

You’re silent for a few moments, “Are you okay today?” You ask. Obviously, you knew he wasn’t but you just said that so he could tell you himself and maybe explain a little.

"I just feel like shit today." He responds. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?" You asked in a soft tone, trying my best to be consoling.

"I've been a shit boyfriend. I've been mean to you when you didn't deserve it." Jungkook explains his thoughts.

"You haven't been a shit boyfriend." You tell him, and you mean it. "You don't always have to be in a good mood, you know?" You then tell him. I mean, he was your boyfriend. Aren't you supposed to be together through bad and good?

He doesn't say anything in response as he looks down at his lap for a moment before using his fingers to comb his hair back and out of his face. You just watch silently.

Jungkook puts his hand on your thigh as he rubs it mindlessly, letting out a sigh. "I think I just need to go to sleep." He tells you.

"Okay, let's go to sleep." You agree, getting up and holding your hand out for him to take.

He puts his hand in yours and stands before the two of you head to your bedroom, heading to go to bed so he can sleep this mood off.

ᥫ᭡ link to my masterlist

[storm-angel989]

hey could you do a Valentino x Daughter Reader where the Vees/Angel finds out that Reader has been starving herself and taking pills that make her lose weight?

Hi there,

So I did write one of these already (check out my master list!) but I wrote another version because you asked to include Angel Dust. Diet pills are another thing I have personal experience with, and I promise you they're not worth it. As hard as it is somedays, our bodies are worthy of love and respect always <3

<3 Mandy

Privacy had never really been a big deal to me. 

Growing up the tech overlord’s niece, I was acutely aware that anything and everything I brought, sent, typed, created, handed in was subject to scrutiny by my Uncle Vox. Not that he went out of his way to divulge into my personal life, but there had definitely been a few times I had been reminded of his power to keep tabs on me. 

It wasn’t until I started dieting to get more into shape for the upcoming school year that Vox’s constant monitoring became an issue. 

It started with the ballerina tea in September. Something my friends at school swore up and down would help me trim down before the holiday season. For the first time in my life, I heard whispers- too big, too small. Just right. Fashion presented in a way even my Aunt Velvette hadn’t shown me. As we thumbed through magazines, shifted through racks of clothes at the local mall, I slowly started to see my friend’s point, and everything my body wasn’t. 

Thoughtlessly, I clicked on the order now button and in minutes, my phone rang.

“Hey, kid. I canceled your order. You can’t drink that stuff, it will seriously mess up your gut,” my Uncle Vox’s voice came through on the line. 

I felt shame spread across my face. Not a single parental figure in my life had ever scolded me for what I wanted to put in my body. Hell, my Dad even let me have ice cream for breakfast one morning when my Mom was out of town. Why was my Uncle Vox even remotely paying attention to what I wanted to drink? Embarrassment. Did he not know just how flawed I was?

Somewhere inside, a little voice told me to keep quiet. 

“Reader? Did you hear me?” Vox’s voice repeated. 

“Ye-yeah, Uncle Vox, sorry,” I squeaked out. “I just…my friends at school they…”

“If your friends at school all jumped off a cliff, would you? I can make a doctor's appointment if you’d like and she can explain exactly what…”

“No, no, Uncle Vox. I’m good,” I replied quickly. “I’ll see you tonight.”

“See you tonight, kiddo.”

I hung up the phone in dismay as cracks in my fantasies began to form. How exactly was I supposed to be thinner if I was hitting a wall trying to use the resources available to me? How was I supposed to look like the models on the cover of Aunt Velvette’s magazines if I kept doing what I was doing? I needed help, but from where? 

My answer lay in the network of friends I had available to me. A quiet whisper- folded notes with paper currency passed in study hall returned with white powder filled capsules. 

Drink a glass of water and take one pill three times a day, the note back read. 

Instructions I could follow easily, and all it took was downing that first pill to get me absolutely hooked. I couldn’t pinpoint when I slowly started to cut back on what I ate, or when the little voice inside my head started to tell me I didn’t deserve food. That the number on the scale was the only thing that mattered and the faster the number went down, the happier the voice inside my head became. Beauty, numbers, purity took over my thoughts. 

As I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I decided that voice had a name. Ana. And she was my only friend in the entire world. 

Two months passed before my world came crashing down. 

“Hey babe, I know you’re on your way out the door, but meet me in my studio afterschool today, hm?” My fathers voice carried across the kitchen. 

I froze. On my normal day to day, I wasn’t allowed anywhere near my fathers business office- or studio, as he called it. I was well aware of what he was in the business of, but he did his best to keep me from it. Or at least, from the worst of it. 

“Why?” I asked, my back turned to him.

“You have a half day. Your Aunt and Uncle both have meetings, so you’ll be doing your homework in my office tonight,” he replied. “And I received several forms in the mail from the school. You need a physical before winter season begins, so we might as well get that done. And then I’ll take you out to lunch. It’s been awhile since we’ve spent time together.” 

The entire thing sounded like my current worst nightmare. I struggled to come up with the words to try to get out of it. 

“But I was going to go to…I have plans, I…”

“Bebita, whatever plans you have, consider them canceled. In my studio, by twelve. The limo will pick you up. That’s all.” Valentino finished. 

An overwhelming sense of dread washed over me. Ana’s voice grew louder, nonsense that I couldn’t discern. No matter how hard I tried,  I couldn’t see my way out of this. Anxiety flooded through me and I worried my way through the entire morning. In truth, I had planned on making up the extra steps I was losing by leaving early at the school gym before I went home. 

Just take an extra dose, Ana whispered. And double each dose, even. Make up for those extra steps missed, and the extra calories I was sure I would end up taking in. A sense of relief washed over me. Of course. Ana always knew what to do. 

I walked into my father’s studio, backpack slung over his shoulder. Noticeably empty was my father’s directors chair. On stage, Angel sat on the bed, wrapped in his pink red trimmed robe. I brightened up instantly. Angel was the only employee of my father’s I knew, the only one I had any sort of relationship with. 

“Hey sweetheart,” Angel said cheerfully. He stood up and walked over to me. “Yer Daddy said you were coming in, how’s school?”

I shrugged. “Fine. Where is Dad?” I glanced at the clock. Twelve thirty. I needed to duck out and take that fourth dose now if I wanted it to be effective. “I have a ton of homework and I want to get started.”

“In a meetin’, but you can use my dressing room,” he replied as he sashayed across the floor. 

I followed him and he pushed open the door, ushering me inside. 

“Trust me, your gonna wanna hang tight, Val- er, your Dad’s mood is gonna be good or bad dependin on how this meetin’ goes,” Angel told me. 

I settled myself on the couch and dug around in my backpack. Behind me, Angel took a seat at his vanity and picked up a brush. I seized the opportunity to unscrew my water bottle and pull out the plastic bag of pills. I had just swallowed the two capsule when a hand plucked the bag out of mine. 

Shit. 

“Hey, kid. Whatcha got there?” Angel asked as he held the bag up to his face. 

“Give those back, they’re mine!” I yelled as I jumped to my feet. “Angel, give them to me!” 

Angel ignored me and instead took the bag over to his vanity. I watched in dismay as he cracked open one of the clear capsules and inspected the contents. 

“How many of these did you take?” He asked.

Silence for a heartbeat. 

“Does your Dad know you’re taking these?” Was his next question.

“No, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell him,” I growled. “Angel, give them back!”

He crossed his arms, plastic bag in hand. “Only if you tell me how many you’ve taken today,” he replied. 

“Four this morning. Four at ten. And I just took four. And I need to take another two tonight,” I replied sharply. “Now give them back.”

Surprise shot across his face. “You took twelve of them? Are you fuckin stupid?” He turned back to his desk and started to rummage through it. “Fucking stupid kids,” he muttered as he came up with a bright orange bottle. I watched as he poured the liquid into the cap. “Here, take this now or I’m goin right to Val,” he thrust the medication to me. “Now, or else. I mean it.” 

“Angel! I…”

“I said, now or I go pull your Daddy from his meetin and trust me, he’s gonna be pissed,” Angel shot back. 

I didn’t doubt any of that. Reluctantly, I took the cap and swallowed the contents. “There, now give me back my pills.” 

“Yeah, I don’t think so,” he replied. He reached out and grabbed my upper arm. “Come with me, otherwise you’re gonna puke all over my dressin room and I don’t think either of us wants that.”

“Angel!” I protested as he practically dragged me across the studio floor. “Angel where are we…” 

He shoved me into the nurses office and yelled to the lady at the front desk to page Valentino. Without waiting, he opened the bathroom door and shoved me inside. My anger turned to pain as my stomach cramped and I felt his hands pull my hair back as I emptied my belly of its contents. 

“That’a girl,” Angel muttered. “Yeah, get it all out.”

“Fuck you Angel, I’m fine,” I snarled. 

“Yeah, cause I make you puke. If I hadn’t, you’d have been dead in about twenty more minutes,” he replied. “Yer Dad’s on the way.” 

“Oh fuck you,” I snarled as the nurse came in. “I swear I…”

Whatever I was going to say stopped as a wave of dizziness hit me. I felt Angel help me kneel to the floor and laid me on my side. The feeling of hands on my chest, my fathers voice as my reality turned black. 

When I came to, I was sitting upright in a hospital bed. Wires attached to my chest and a plethora of monitors surrounded me. A tickle in my throat and I tried to cough as I raised my hand to itch my face. My fingers hit tape and plastic and I couldn’t Groggily, I strained to hear the noise on the other side of the door. 

“Val, I saw it in the mirror. She was sitting on the couch and she swallowed a few, but I got her to tell me how much she took. I had to make her puke or she woulda…” Angel’s desperate voice. 

“Where the fuck did she find that shit?” My father’s voice growled. “How the fuck did my daughter get ahold of that…Angel, just…” His tone shifted to frustration. Silence, and a sigh. “You did the right thing. Probably saved her. Just go, consider this shoot canceled and take the night. Go to the hotel or whatever it is you do, I need to handle this…situation.”

“Just, will ya lemme know when she wakes up?” Angel’s voice pleaded. “Val, if what she took was what I thought, she coulda died.”

“I know. And I will.” My father’s voice was softer. “Go.” 

Time passed and I felt myself slip in out of consciousness. I was vaguely aware of my father fussing, flashes of Angel, my Uncle Vox and Aunt Velvette. But for the most part I stayed asleep. At some point, the tickle in my throat vanished, but the needle in my arm stayed. It could have been a week, or maybe a day when I could I finally held myself awake long enough to hear what was going on. A few blinks, and I could make out my father’s figure standing next to my Aunt and Uncle at the base of the bed. 

“We’re lucky we caught it when we did, she’s lost some weight. Her bloodwork isn’t great, but it’s fixable. It’s more important now that she connects with a therapist and…” said an unfamiliar voice. 

“Daddy?” Even to me, my voice sounded scratchy. “Daddy?” 

Four heads turned to me. The Doctor walked over and began to check the monitors.

“Good to see you awake, baby girl,” my Uncle Vox said as he brushed away an invisible strand of hair. “How are you feeling?” 

“What happened?” I asked as my father sat on the side of the bed. “Why am I in the hospital?”

“Maybe you want to fill us in,” Velvette suggested. 

The doctor cleared his throat. “I would suggest waiting for the thera-”

“Leave us. This is a family matter for the time being,” my father commanded with the authority only an overlord of hell could have. 

I watched as he instantly turned and walked out the door, closing it behind him. My father turned his attention back to me. I hung my head and after a few moments of quiet, Valentino’s voice filled the air. 

“Let me break it down for you. Angel watched you- from the mirror- swallow two pills. You told him those were the twelfth ones you had taken that day. He, because he isn’t a dumbass and has probably taken them himself, recognizes them right away and forces ippapec down your throat. He gets you to the nurse and you vomit until you pass out. I show up, and we decide that your stomach needs to be pumped. Doc asks me how much you weigh and I realize that somehow, since September, you’ve lost about twenty seven pounds. Tell me, muñeca, how exactly does that happen?”

For the first time since this all began, Ana went silent. Without that voice to guide me, I swallowed back my nerves. 

“I went on a diet. I took diet pills, Dad. That’s what Angel got all mad about.”

“And rightly so,” Velvette interrupted. “All diet pills are dangerous, but the ones you took? They’re ten times as strong. Combined with skipping meals, they’ll wreck your body.”

“And don’t try to tell us you wern’t,” Vox added. “I reviewed the footage. We saw it all, honey.”

I looked down at the blanket. “So what happens now? Am I grounded?”

Silence from the three of them. I felt my fathers hand on mine and his finger tilted my chin up.

“I don’t think you quiet get the point. You almost died, honey. I…” 

I watched an expression I couldn’t quite read flit across his face. He took a deep breath before he continued. 

“Here is the plan. Now that you’re awake, you’re going to talk to a doctor. As soon as you get the all clear, you can go home. We can figure out where to go from then, but for now…for now honey, I’m just glad you’re alive.” 

I reached for him and my father folded me into his arms. 

“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I wasn’t trying to die, I…”

“Don’t be sorry. We’ll figure it out. I promise. I love you, mi amore,” he replied softly. “We all love you. We’ll get through this, I promise.”

[lostintransist]

Liaison | Part 6 | Galas, Business, and Backroom Deals

Check out part one here. Up to chapter 34/38 on AO3.

Blinking hard at the computer didn’t change the fact the words had all become unreadable. You had started work at four am and hadn’t left your chair since. The phone showed 10:23 AM if you squinted. Pushing away from the computer you shuffled to the kitchen for a cup of coffee.

As the last of the liquid ability to keep going dripped into your cup Kate finds you.

“Ah, Liaison. I’m glad I found you. I’ve cleared your schedule for the day. Go and grab your bag.” Kate dressed simply in jeans and flannel.

“What do you even do here Kate?”

Kate smirked at your exhausted question. “I coordinate teams on the ground. While you line up jobs for the team now I keep them all moving to the goals once we work the jobs.”

“Why did you clear my schedule then?” You focus the majority of your energy on the task of moving your coffee to a to-go cup and adding the prescribed amount of creamer.

“Because you’ve been with us long enough that Shepherd and I agree you can start taking on the networking parties.” The grin Kate has wouldn’t look out of place on a crocodile.

“And if I don’t want to be the face of the 141?” You mumble the question into your coffee. Kate hears you anyway.

“Too bad, you’ll be getting a £50,000 yearly raise and a company card for expenses.”

Spit takes with hot coffee should lead to a fine for whoever made the coffee come out of your nose. You cough until you can breathe again.

“Now much is my raise?” You stare at Kate with wide eyes, mouth agape.

“You heard me. Now go and get your stuff we have a lot to get done today. I’ll wait for you in the lobby.”

Hurrying down the hall you pack up your computer and ensure your workspace is clear. Firing off a quick text to König you head back down the hall.

<I’m getting a raise, so that’s cool. But now I have to go to parties 🤮

A reply pops up on your screen before you can reach the lobby.

>I would rather shoot myself in the head.

<While I understand the sentiment I’m going to like the chance to drink while working.

When you move close enough to see the lobby you see Harold, face red and chin quivering, talking with Kate who leans over the high counter.

“You okay Harold?”

Kate spins around to look at you while Harold sits in his chair, head disappearing below the eye line.

“He got some bad news about his family, ready to go?” Kate replies for him. She ushers you through the front door. You look over your shoulder, seeing nothing amiss.

“Where are we headed first?” You climb into the right side of the car, still uncomfortable with UK cars despite being here a year.

“You are getting a makeover today. Facial, massage, hair colored, among other things and then we are going to get you several dresses. Your first party is on Friday. I will be going with you and introducing you to a few people. Word that you work for us won’t take long to get around. Most people there will already have your number in their phone, so adding a pretty face to the number should help us get more jobs.” Kate drove as she spoke, slipping into traffic with ease.

“Kitty is going to be your hair stylist, she also does makeup. She is good at keeping her mouth shut and because of that has some high-priority clientele. Lana is going to provide your massage and Tia is going to give you a facial. We will be done at their salon in about two hours, which will leave plenty of time to get some dresses and shoes. The ladies will work at the same time to get everything done in time.”

You take note of the names Kate mentions and write them down in a small notebook along with what each woman does. This had been your trick to keeping jobs and people straight as you learn about them. Writing them helps everything stick and allows you to update your spreadsheets.

Kate always struck you as someone who tried to be ‘one of the guys’. Being on a first-name basis with women who fell into more traditionally female-coded jobs felt out of character. You tuck the incongruence into your mental folder on Kate. She did manage the liaison position before you, and if you are forced to go to parties then Kate must have had as well. You wonder if you can get a suit along with the dresses you are slated for.

The turn into the parking structure takes you by surprise, the oh-shit handle becoming one with your hand. Kate drives a bit wild, nothing like the controlled sedation of Harold. Though, as you think on it she drives much better than most of the team. You end up in a car with them for one reason or another from time to time.

Riding the elevator in silence you notice, maybe for the first time that you had several inches on Kate. Her large presence and the fact you slouched in your chair most of the time had left you with the impression you stood at nearly the same height.

When the ding of the elevator alerted you to the arrival of the correct floor you catch sight of a beautiful woman with bright pink hair standing behind the counter.

“Hi, Kate! Is this your new liaison?”

You wave as Kate introduces you.

“And remind me what we are getting ready for today?”

“Galas, business, and backroom deals like always Kitty.”

They laughed as if this were a commonly shared joke.

The next two hours should have been calming. All of your knots are attacked and obliterated by Lana. You must keep a neutral face when Tia is working on removing layers of dead skin. Kitty gives you what she calls low lights. You have no idea what that means but once all the women step from the room you rush to clothe yourself. Kate enters the room without knocking as you are halfway through getting your jeans on.

“Do you have any nicer underwear?” she pulls a face at your cotton undies and plain t-shirt bra.

“No? I don’t need them.” You wiggle your pants over your hips and ass, buttoning them and grabbing your shirt.

“You will, I will add that to our list of items to pick up.”

“If no one will be seeing them then I don’t need them.”

“Not your call, plus the nice underwear makes the clothes sit better, I promise.”

“I can’t imagine you getting all fancy for parties like this.”

“Oh trust me,” a wry tone, “It was not a walk in the park for me.”

Once your shirt is settled back in place you follow Kate into the proper salon area. Kitty has you sit in her chair. She drapes a gown over your clothes and gives you a light trim with some shaping. Kitty talks with Kate for most of the visit.

“What is the feeling you are going for on Friday’s party?”

“Classy, we need to introduce her and let her settle in people’s minds as one of ours before we start making waves.”

“Okay, send me a picture once you have the dress picked out and I will work with my associate Emma to get everything ready. Since there will be two of you I will be needing help.”

Hair cut, face scrubbed, nails buffed and shined, thoroughly assaulted you follow Kate back to the elevator. Going down two floors you are interested to see a high-end shop. The woman dressed all in black greats Kate with an air of self-importance, glancing you over before dismissing you mentally.

You can do no more than try on a dress and present it to Kate and the mistress of the shop before you are ordered back to try on another. After the twelfth dress, you send a message to König. The picture you send him is flattering, the floor-length ballgown hugged your breasts and flowed down in an elegant A-line.

<You wanted to be a sniper right?

>Ja.

<Any chance you could arrange to take me out before I have to try one more gown?

>Nein. You are friend.

The only reply you can think to send is a picture of you flipping him the bird.

@nicroyal02

Part 5 | Part 7

Masterlist

[portraitsofguilt]

young agents in love:

the first time you went over to deal business with solomon reed as the newest consultant of his and the fia, you came across a girl who seemed to be lost in her own world, or rather the network, judging by the netrunning chair she settled in during most of your visit. you were quick to learn however that she could push your buttons faster than any kind of higher-ranking agent who was trying to get through to you before forcing your hand and making you join the agency.

“reed will just take a moment.” you nodded at her words, one of the few times that the two of you actually exchanged words and you didn’t just stare at her like some freak. you stood to the side, letting her walk past you with ease and get back into her chair. but you couldn’t ignore how you didn’t hear the click of her gear so you turned back to face her and noticed she was staring at the box in your hand.

“what’s that?” it took her a second to build up the courage to ask, but sure enough she did and even a blind person could see that you were once an animal from dogtown with the way your chrome glowed with the neon streaks under the dim lights of the room. dead giveaway, you couldn’t even deny it.

you shrugged, “a gift, where i come from we don’t arrive without a little something.” yes, dogtown had its own little traditions, so to speak, that is to mention that most of the time the gifts back home were bombs or other lethal objects that were made to harm the receiver. everyone jumped to conclusions about what your intentions were when you stepped outside of dogtown, but in reality, they were all harmless.

you could bet she was thinking you were here by mistake, looking to score a deal with the wrong people, or a chrome up that you wanted to cheat the system to get. the look on her face told you though that she wasn’t satisfied with your answer at all, so you followed it up just to get her off your ass, “it’s a shard, something reed has been looking for and i got it for him.” she hummed after you explained then you heard the click and she was gone.

every time you visited you were interrogated by so mi (you also learned her name over the course of your many visits) about your ‘gifts’ and why you turned up in the hideout time and time again. you always told her, you were here because solomon reed asked you to be and little details about the shards and other kinds of gifts that you brought.

today was probably the last time you visited the hideout after months, getting wind of that the fia is sending solomon on his way to take on another mission. your only quest was to get enough information and maybe ‘bribe’ your contacts (as once you were thought by kurt hansen himself) for intel, telling them that you were still with the barghest but in reality, you were dropping the wire on how to infiltrate various points of interest.

“this is my last visit here, thought i would bring something for my favorite netrunner.” your walls slowly crumbled down, all assumptions getting lost in the fog of your mind and heart growing closer to the netrunner.

so mi was hesitant of accepting the wrapped gift from your offering hand. “trust me it wasn’t easy to shit something like this out, you wanna take it.” she didn’t have to know how hard it was to gather just one little shard with all the stuff she wished for, this is when you need to thank reed before never seeing him ever again for helping.

“i… um…” her voice shook with uncertainty, gazing at the shard between your fingers. “i don’t know what to say.” so mi breathed.

“then…” you start, biting your tongue to slow yourself down before muttering some nonsense. “what if i ask the big guy to let you out? for lunch or dinner, we could make it a date…” you made a mess of your feelings at the end there, slipped up but it could have ended a lot worse than it actually did.

“a date sounds perfect.” so mi said, not having too much luck with trying to hold back the smile that crept up on her face as she stepped up to you. her hands landed on your shoulders, tip-toeing up so your faces were right in front of each other, just inches away. too fast…

she quickly pulled away, muttering an apology for her sudden moves. you assured her she didn’t do anything wrong. “kid, come on inside.” you heard reed call out. you looked over your shoulder before looking back at so mi and leaning in to press a gentle kiss on her rosy cheek.

“something to make sure you won’t stand me up.” you turned on your heels, and now the composed and serious ex-barghest walked inside the office she knew very well. you could jump out of your skin over so mi saying yes to your date later, and work out some other details (like how you two are both agents and the guys on the eighth floor didn’t really find that a good idea) even after that.

a/n: i always wanted to write something for songbird and now that I am easing into this blurb or drabble style I got going on right now I thought why not cook up something for the best netrunner in the world? i hope you guys liked it and thank you for reading !!!

[hoshibatake]

FREEDOM – Epilogue

Previous chapter

<Several days later. On a set based on the fictitious city “FREEDOM”>

Subaru: Whoa…! It looks a lot more like FREEDOM than I thought it would!

Subaru: You can even actually play games in the arcade. That’s amazing. It’s just like the real thing☆

Mao: FREEDOM is a virtual city, so calling it “the real thing” is a bit confusing.

Mao: But this really is amazing. This place looks just like what we saw on our screens.

Hokuto: I agree. Although it’s just a set, so it's not as big as that virtual world…

Hokuto: But even if it’s just the central area, it makes me happy to see it recreated in such detail.

Makoto: Yeah. This area is especially packed with our “love”¹, after all.

Makoto: Anzu-chan, you asked Tenshouin-senpai to let us film a music video in FREEDOM, right? Thanks for doing that for us♪

Subaru: ...Oh～? Among the project’s business partners, there was a production company that you knew, so you got them to help you with a proposal?

Subaru: So FREEDOM thanks its existence to the network you’ve built up, huh?

Subaru: That’s our Anzu! Ms. President～♪

Hokuto: What is it, Anzu?

Hokuto: …“I didn’t do anything”? Don’t say that.

Hokuto: You handed FREEDOM over to us, and let us develop it freely from the start until the end. You must have thought about correcting our unskilled attempts multiple times.

Hokuto: But instead, you watched over us as we learned, didn’t you?

Hokuto: Not because you didn’t want to guide us, but because you believed that we could do it. I’m grateful for that.

Mao: Yeah. And you even casually conjured up this extra job of filming a music video.

Mao: Our miniature city of FREEDOM, which was only known by a couple of people, will be appreciated all over the world because of this new song.

Mao: In other words, we’ll be able to show our fans what we’re like in this new year. We get to show them our “love”.

Mao: As usual, you’re an impressively competent producer, Anzu.

Mao: ...Alright. It looks like everything’s ready, so let’s start filming♪

Hokuto&Mao: “♪～♪～♪”

Mao: ...But this sure was a strange job offer. Building a city and all that.

Hokuto: Indeed. But it was fun. This isn’t something just anyone gets to experience in their daily life.

Mao: True. I’d love to try out lots of other new things this year.

Mao: Normal things like the stuff other idols do just don’t fit us as well♪

Hokuto: When we just met, all you wanted was to live in peace. It seems as if you’ve been thoroughly corrupted too, huh?

Mao: Ahaha, you might be right. I still prefer peaceful times, but goofing off with you guys is just so much fun.

Mao: At this point I’m fully immersed in Trickstar...♪

Subaru: “♪～♪～♪”

Subaru: After we’re done filming, this set will be torn down, right?

Subaru: I wanna keep singing and dancing here forever. I wanna stay in this world for as long as I can!

Subaru: Maybe I should mess up my dance moves on purpose, so we’ll have no choice but to do more takes～♪

Makoto: Ahaha. You’ll cause trouble for the staff if you do that.

Makoto: If we finish early, they might allow us to explore the city at our leisure. Let’s do our best and make a great music video♪

Makoto: “♪～♪～♪”

Makoto: Akehoshi-kun, can I reminisce about the distant past with you for a bit?

Subaru: The distant past? The time when you were a baby?

Makoto: Ahaha, not that distant. About when I became “Yuuki Makoto” the idol.

Makoto: Do you remember the Venus Cup²? It was before we even formed Trickstar.

Subaru: Yeah. That was the DreFes we participated in during our first year, right?

Makoto: That’s the one. At that time I had more time on my hands than I knew what to do with. The only reason I even attended the Venus Cup was to balance the number of representatives from each class.

Makoto: I was just another nameless idol, one of a countless number at Yumenosaki.

Makoto: But back then… in that venue where most of the seats were empty, you called out to me.

Makoto: “Let’s sing together”, you said. You told me I wasn’t all alone up on that stage.

Makoto: (When I was a model, I was always alone.)

Makoto: (...No. I “didn’t exist”. I just played the role that was expected of me. I was empty inside.)

Makoto: (I enrolled at Yumenosaki because I didn’t want to be like that anymore.)

Makoto: ...That’s the moment I became an idol.

Makoto: By telling me “let’s do our best together!”, you breathed life into me.

Makoto: Although you might have forgotten about that moment.

Subaru: Ahaha, I remember! How could I forget?

Subaru: We stood shoulder to shoulder and sang like friends. Just like this, woo...♪

Makoto: W-Whoa! Akehoshi-kun, let go of me. This way we’ll have to redo the take.

Subaru: Ahaha! It’s okay, the camera is focused on Sari～ and Hokke～ right now☆

Subaru: ...That day there was almost no one who bothered to watch us, but now we have loads of fans.

Subaru: All those people are proof that we’ve been doing things right all along.

Subaru: That’s exactly why I feel like we’re unstoppable as long as we’re with the four of us! If we work extra hard, we might even be able to perform in the unexplored expanse of space one day☆

Subaru: There’s no bigger joy than working towards a shared goal with your friends, don’t you agree, Ukki～♪?

Makoto: Yeah… I think so too.

Makoto: In the past I didn’t believe in myself. Even after I got into a school for idols, I didn’t have a clue what to do.

Makoto: I was gathering dust like a shelf full of unplayed games.

Makoto: But then I met the others, and we formed Trickstar. I became myself… I became free.

Makoto: Sometimes I still get frustrated because I feel incompetent, but…

Makoto: ...as long as I get to sing and laugh with the others like I am right now, I’m incredibly happy.

Makoto: I’m so glad I decided to become an idol...♪

Makoto: “♪～♪～♪”

TL notes:

Every time any of the characters talks about “love” in quotes in this chapter, it was the word 『好き』“suki” in quotes in Japanese. Suki can mean love or like (love for objects, hobbies, people, etc.), and it can also be used in the sense of “the way I like/want”. I interpreted it like this: they were talking about their “suki” in many senses of the word. So things that they enjoy, people they love, the way in which they express their love/enthusiasm, as well as having the freedom to do what they like.

The story that describes the events surrounding the Venus Cup in more detail is “Rocket Start”.

Translated by me, proofread by Altea (@icaruswasthesun on Twitter)

Big thanks to Altea for proofreading all of my work, and thank you for reading!

[ecargmura]

Ron Kamonohashi's Forbidden Deductions Episode 25 Review - Their Final Deduction

Hey, I got the culprit right! Though, it was very obvious because of his rather prolific voice actor, but I still got it right! However, what made me happier than getting the culprit right is the fact that Toto is more competent than he was back in the observatory case.

Heck, Toto feels more dependable than ever before. He’s the one trying to get Ron to get back into reality and was the one most hurt when Ron decided that this case would be their finale as a duo. He’s also the one trying to defend Ron from Karen’s accusations and what not. While Ron did pick up where he left off after a bit, it was still nice seeing Toto not be a blubbering idiot who can’t do anything without Ron. To be honest, when I saw these two touching each other, I was thinking they should’ve kissed. I’m still awaiting the day they do.

It’s sad seeing Ron be all dejected after learning about his father, Eliot Moriarty, but I know for a fact that he’s going to change his mind…if there’s a season 3 announced. Though, I still do think there is more to the memory of his father. There’s no way his father would teach him all about crime and was also willing to marry someone from the Holmes’ lineage if he was a bad guy. It’s also nice seeing catatonic Ron slowly getting the light back in his eyes when he sees Toto working so hard to solve the case. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is.

I knew the flower in Lenny’s hand would be significant, given it’s a Tiger Lily. I do want to dance for joy, but I won’t. Who knew Lenny’s inability to speak Japanese would be a crucial clue? Also, remember back in Episode 23 where Tiger Dan was the one who was about to take the flower off of the victim’s hand, but Toto said to stop as it’d be tampering with the crime scene. I knew it was Tiger Dan the moment he tried doing that. The way Tiger Dan shifts his body language the moment he was exposed was great. He went from uncertain to smug and confident. He’s awfully calm about being exposed. His motive was to get Ron to realize his roots as a Moriarty and to stop sleuthing for good.

Other than the crime scene stuff, am I the only one who finds Karen Lily super annoying? No wonder her name is Karen. She’s been behaving like one the moment the crimes started happening with her accusations towards Ron and believing Ron and Toto are fakes. It’s actually surprising that she didn’t die and is still alive. Props to her voice actress for doing a splendid job making her annoying.

My only gripe is that there’s one thing about the crime scene that bugs me. Ron and Toto mention that the excessive flowers on Lenny’s corpse is due to Tiger Dan getting a balloon and popping it, which is the loud noise Karen heard. However, what caused the balloon to pop? His own hands? The ice pick? That part isn’t explained and that bugs me.

Next week is the finale, meaning crazy things will happen. What will happen? All I want next week is an announcement for season 3 because I want to see more RonToto and friends! Also, good news for Ron Kamonohashi fans, Anime News Network puts this show as one of the writers’ best animes for this season! I do think this is a step up in improvement from last season! All in all, what are your thoughts on this episode?

[historicfailure]

Chapter 9: The change within

Working so closely with Kakashi, you begin to notice a slow, but gradual change in him.

~ X ~

After a direction for the campaign was set and a slogan was now found which could be used as a foundation to go forward with other procedures, you found yourself more and more entrenched in the work. And now, with Kakashi fully on board, work was easier. Easier because, well, he obviously didn’t have the time to bully you any longer. The apologies also helped, of course. That reassurance was all you needed to go all in with your work, even if it meant to work longer than everybody else or harder than anybody else on the team. Even though your job was not much more than collecting data and evaluating said data, you also found yourself doing more than that; taking part in the creative process. Work you had to cast aside in the previous firm you worked at, knowing you would indulge too much, but it was needed right here and now. 

And not only that was needed of you. 

“When will this be done? Do you have a timeline on this?”

You were only half-aware of Kakashi inquiring about something from Iruka. Your mind was in too deep with the next set of slideshows to present to the committee of Akatsuki next week. Painstakingly dragging one slide in Photoshop into a corner, making sure it was perfectly aligned, then adding and erasing the same effect a moment later. It didn’t add anything to the presentation, just unnecessary flourish which didn’t make any sense. In the larger scheme, of course.

“I just wanted to know-!”

“All the details you need are in the mail I sent you.”

A low sigh escaped you. This presentation was crucial, it needed to be finished by the end of the week, and half of the stuff in the presentation wasn’t even ready to be shown yet, thanks to the late start. It all had to be finished this week, and everyone tasked to handle the Akatsuki marketing campaign was working their asses off. Still, Kakashi and you were usually the last ones to leave the office. Absent-mindedly, you went through the motions of creating another slide for the presentation, before a sharp and louder than usual voice made you look up from your screen. 

To your surprise, Iruka stood up from his chair in front of Minato’s office to face off with Kakashi. The smaller, yet broader man snarled up into Kakashi’s face, the tanned skin of his face blushing from frustration and anger; two emotions you were all too familiar with when it came to dealing with the prick of a guy. 

“What is your problem?” Iruka reached up to tighten his high ponytail with a sharp gesture. “You have all the information you need in the email-!”

Kakashi interjected, his tone cold and just as sharp as Iruka’s gesture had been. “I’m not sure if you understand. I said that the deadline isn’t in the mail, I checked twice.”

“The deadline is in the mail, right in the second paragraph!”

“It’s. Not. In. There. How many times do I have to repeat myself, Umino?”

Both of your eyebrows shot up. What the hell was going on? Sure, Kakashi was an asshole sometimes, but you still had never seen him raise his voice like this. Especially not to someone like Iruka. Sweet, gentle Iruka, who was always friendly and ready to help out in the full capacity of his capability.  Which was extensive: despite being the same age as you, his parents apparently had built an extensive network and introduced Iruka to the world of marketing the day he was born. If Iruka didn’t know someone, they weren’t important, simple as that. Plus, he had worked as a teacher before. His scoldings were truly one of a kind. No one, in this entire firm, was willing to anger him, besides Anko. And Anko didn’t truly count, she was insane anyway.

Your hands continued to half-heartedly move the mouse and ghost over the keyboard, pretending to work, while your ears fixated more and more on the sharp conversation just a few desks over. 

“It’s right there! Check your eyes, Hatake.”

“Checked two times. There is nothing!”

“And I checked three times that the most important info you needed is in the mail!”

“Well, it isn’t. Just send me the info when you fucking have it.”

“You have all the info you need!” Just in time, you turned your head the tiniest bit to see how Iruka stormed around his desk to check the mail in question personally. Everyone close by seemed to hold their breaths in the next moments, only disturbed by the furious clicks of his mouse. Then, a triumphant snort, and Iruka jerked upright, glaring at Kakashi. “Check it yourself. And maybe get your eyes checked as well, while you’re at it.”

Iruka pointed at his screen. Kakashi clicked his tongue, but followed suit and walked around the desk to check the other man’s screen. A few seconds passed, then Kakashi, without another word, turned and walked away.

“You’re welcome!” Iruka called after him, only to shake his head. “What a fucking prick…”

What the fuck just happened? You surely weren’t the only one left flabbergasted at what just happened right in front of the entire office, right? With Kakashi being blatantly wrong and not coming out on top somehow. Even though you weren’t a fan of his anymore, you at least could see that this wasn’t his usual behavior. So far, you experienced him as sometimes mean-spirited or socially inclined, maybe cold and nonchalant, but never openly heated. This fight was strange and not typical for the man.

~ X ~

“I noticed your little altercation with Iruka today.”

“Mhm.” Kakashi only hummed, refusing to elaborate further. Understandably so. Deep into the evening, with the open office once again empty, you had felt secure enough to start a conversation with him. 

“What was that one about?” You leaned over the desk, arms crossed and eyes transfixed on the man, who was trying to busy himself with typing up a fitting proposal for the upcoming presentation. “Something about a deadline?”

“Yeah”, he sighed. For another long moment, he stayed silent, eyes glaring at the screen like he would find the answer to your question there, but then his look cleared. His fingers quickly flew over the keyboard once more, like they had never stopped in the first place. “I ordered some print materials for the presentation next week. Didn’t get any info so far if they were able to finish them on time or not, so I tried to get an inquiry on the timeline.”

“And…?”

Suddenly, Kakashi pushed his chair away from the table. Both of his hands rose to scrub wildly through his hair, to the point the motions looked almost painful. “Iruka sent them in that godforsaken email, and I misread it. I thought he forgot to include the date, but it was in there.”

“Oh. Okay.” 

It wasn’t Kakashi’s style to escalate a situation like this; with angry voices, sharp tones and tense nerves. Over the last few weeks, he had been stressed for sure, and yet you didn’t think he was someone to get easily angry over an honest mistake like Iruka could have potentially made. And for Kakashi to be so tardy to misread a line and completely miss the information he desperately waited for? No, that also wouldn’t be like him. Something else was amiss here. 

Your mouth already opened to comment on his behavior, but your brain shut it again before you could get any words out. Kakashi knew he fucked up. He obviously did, and blamed himself for it. You didn’t have to tell him. The most sensible thing you could do was help him out a bit. Of course, for the sake of hopefully restoring some peace in the office and making sure Iruka wouldn’t rightfully take gruesome revenge on Kakashi. 

“Iruka likes the Ichiraku instant cup noodles.”

For the first time, Kakashi looked properly at you. His eyes flickered upwards, dancing over your entire face. Your words didn’t seem to properly register for a few seconds. After a few more moments of blind staring, a light seemed to go off above his head. “You mean…”

“Buying him some of the XXtra Fire Spicy kind might be a good peace offering”, you said, then gently tabbed against your nose. “You don’t know this from me, though. Anko would kill me if she ever finds out I’m handing out her bribery-info like that.”

A quick grin flashed over his face. “I wouldn’t dare to rat you out. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” 

“I have to ask, though.”

“What?”

“Why?” 

“Because…” You breathed in, trying to find the right words. “Because an angry and vengeful Iruka could throw some stones into our way. Because I want to make this work now. Because why not?” You shrugged weakly. “Does there have to be a reason at this point?”

Kakashi shook his head. “But I liked to hear your reasons. They’re all pretty damn good.” His eyes flitted again over your face. Down from your eyes to your nose and further below, lingering there, then up again. He pushed himself even further away from the desk, then sighed again. “Sorry for this mess. I will fix it.”

“All good. Nice to see I’m not the only one who has to suffer under the terrible reign of Kakashi Hatake, entitled egomaniac and incredibly conceited on top of that.”

That made him at least chuckle. “Egomaniac and conceited? Hard to beat.”

“I could have added self-absorbed and thoughtless, but hey. No need to be cruel.”

You watched how the new creases and wrinkles around Kakashi’s eyes deepened with his tired grin. The little dip in your stomach at the sight was promptly ignored and pushed aside, into a forgotten corner, where your admiration for the man rested after discovering how much of an asshole he could be. 

~ X ~

Seeing your face today made coming to work worth it. 

Keep it up!

~ X ~

“Kakashi, could we speak for a moment?” 

Of course, he expected Minato to come to him. Not after this fucking colossal mishap of a social interact he had with Iruka. 

I can’t be burned out. I feel fine enough. I just need to get through this campaign, then it will be alright. 

It’s my fault the campaign takes so long. It’s my fault, I have to keep the team here for overtime almost every night. It’s my fault Minato and Kushina have to beg for extensions on the deadlines for the campaign, because I took so damn long to get one single fucking idea.

I can’t let them all down. When this is all over, I can rest again, or even think about the off-chance of being…

He didn’t want to think about it, didn’t even name the sickness in his thoughts. Naming it gave it power, made it real, made it terrifying enough to shy away from it. Minato asking such questions in the first place said all Kakashi needed to know. The quality of his work had diminished, worsened noticeably over the last few months. Had others noticed as well? Were they looking at him, trying to see if he was failing? 

 ~ X ~

With the weather turning against, the sky turning bleak and cloudy every so often, and with the long hours of work filling your days, it was no miracle you felt more tired than usual. Sometimes, right after lunch, your eyelids began to drop, and the afternoon always turned into gum with how long it seemed to stretch out. But it was necessary, so you dutifully noted down all of your overtime, gritted your teeth and brewed extra strong coffee with the new machine in the break room. 

You could see the toll also in Kakashi. Apart from his ever-present eyebags, more often than not he was yawning, one hand lazily covering his mouth. His posture was even more slumped than usual, shoulders dropping and spine slouching to the point you wanted to ask him if he was suffering from some spinal injury. Sometimes, especially late in the night, when him and you were the only people left in the office, he would space out. 

“Hey, I looked over the time schedule Itachi sent, and Akatsuki wants to reschedule the next appointment for an update on the campaign.”

After a few moments of absolute silence, you looked up. It took a bit for your eyes to adjust, going from the brightly lit screen of your laptop to the dim surroundings of the office. By now, it was customary to move closer with your laptop to Kakashi’s desk, as he was insistent on working at his own desk, “where everything is where it’s supposed to be and I can find everything”. 

There was no one at the desk. You strained your eyes, peering through the curtain of tiredness hanging over your mind. Strange. Kakashi hadn’t gotten up, right? You would have noticed. With a twinge in your stomach, you got up. And instantly spotted him.

He was sleeping. Kakashi was sleeping, upper body draped across the desk, face squashed against his arm, which was protectively laid out over a bunch of paper, the pencil still loosely held up by his fingers. Only illuminated by the screens in front of him, where flickering lights showed off the latest Akatsuki-promotion videos they produced in house and Itachi sent over as a directional tool, he seemed so…

Young. 

Younger than you had ever expected him to be. Carefully as to not wake the man, you leaned in, trying to figure out what was now so different. Maybe it was because the wrinkles around his eyes had softened. Or because his mouth was slightly open, mumbling weakly but without any coherent wording. Or because for the first time, there were no pretenses for Kakashi to hide behind. 

Your heart fluttered weakly when he mumbled again, pretty lips opening and closing, before a sigh drifted past his mouth. Up so close and without any defenses, it was so easy to forget all the reasons why you should stay away. Kakashi was all light; silvery mysterious moonlight, only disturbed by the small dot of a dimple right below his mouth. 

Stop this. It’s creepy as fuck.

With a shake of your head, you stepped fully around the desk. He had to wake up, and even more so, get out of this office.

“Hey…” Gently, you reached out, poking your index finger into his shoulder. Once, then twice. “Kakashi? Wake up.”

A weak grumble erupted from him, but nothing else. Again, you poked him, this time a bit more forcefully. “Hey. Wake up. You can go home.”

“Mhmm…” Kakashi pulled a face, eyes still closed. One of his hands came up to shield his face from any light, sound or your contact. “Five more…”

“Alright. Don’t blame me though when you have a stiff neck in the end.” You backed up, already trying to forget how Kakashi looked like when his face was crumpled by a good nap, when the man shot upright. 

“What-?” He yawned widely, eyes quickly blinking away the last bits of sleep. “Where am I?”

“Still in the office. Had a good nap?”

“Unfortunately, one of the better ones I had lately.” 

“Trouble falling asleep, ah. Can’t say I’m unfamiliar.” And you meant it. 

Kakashi shrugged. “Or staying asleep. And yet…” He fell silent, eyes glazing over and staring emptily at the blue-lit screens in front of him. You nearly expected to see a string of drool dribbling down his chin, but then, he seemed to wake up from his weird trance. “Sorry for keeping you here. You can go, it’s already…” 

“I’m not going,” you said, while Kakashi tried to check the time with bleary eyes, “before you have gotten out of your chair and come with me.”

“But…”

“I’m not up to argue this point right now.” 

For a very long second, Kakashi seemed to actually want to argue. The sharp crease around his mouth deepened, gnawing at his inner cheek. You sharpened the look you gave him; just a bit more edge and bite in your eyes, then he nodded in defeat. 

“Sure. Let me just grab my laptop and-!”

“You’re leaving the laptop here as well.”

That, however, got you a stronger reaction than you thought. 

“I can’t”, Kakashi shook his head, “I can’t leave the laptop here.”

“Yes. You can. There’s literally no reason why you couldn’t.”

“But there’s so much work to do!”

The realization of what exactly was happening wasn’t a sudden one. No, you had suspected in the back of your mind what was exactly going on with Kakashi. His uncharacteristic snappiness towards other people, the mistakes and sloppiness, him falling asleep yet panicking, all of those were hints leading toward the real problem. And now these familiar lines. Lines you had said yourself a while back, with a pounding heart in your throat and bile gathering in your stomach. These fucking lines, all too familiar and still numbing your self all the same. 

You paused, mouth slightly open as you tried to find the right words. Words you had needed to hear from someone. But it was still Kakashi Hatake.

You and him weren’t close. Not that close, in fact. And you suspected that no one else, but his parents were close enough to say them, and you also suspected they hadn’t noticed anything uncommon with their son yet. 

“Kakashi”, you started slowly, “if you continue on this campaign in your state, you will regret it later. It is of no use to anyone if you force yourself to be creative like this.”

“We have no time, we still have so many things to do, and we’re behind because-!”

“We’re not so far behind anymore. We did so much work during the last weeks. Kakashi…”

He shook his head, all sharp, jerky movements. “No. No, it’s because of me. I have to… I need to make this right.”

“You already did. Listen.”

The man still shook his head. Caught in a loop, created by his state and exhaustion. Probably also due to sleeping troubles. “I can’t, there’s still some color schemes left to talk over, I need to adjust the…” His voice trailed off, drifting away like a sigh swept away by a sudden gust of wind. 

“Kakashi.” You reached over, fingers touching and tugging at the soft fabric of his comfy, oversized sweater. “Listen to me. You did enough for today. Tomorrow, we can do more stuff. Tonight, you take a shower, you get yourself a nice meal, and try to have some sleep. It is okay.”

But he wasn’t listening. His eyes were bearing down on your hand, intently following the movements of your gentle tugging, before sliding right up your arm and further up to the curve of your shoulder, the dip of your neck, and right up to your face. 

“Kakashi”, you tried again, “You can go home. It’s fine.”

“Why do you care if I leave or not? It’s not like you particularly like me.”

“I came to tolerate you. Besides, I still need you.”

“For what? For not having any ideas? For not being creative enough? For making shitty, stupid mistakes and holding everyone up?” His voice rose, the tone frustrated like you had never heard him before. Like a dam was broken, the water breaking free and ripping away all of his inhibitions and usual restraints. “I’m trying so hard to make things right because I know that I fucked up by not having an idea for ages, then for being indecisive, and now everything is too much! I’m fucking drowning over here, and I know I shouldn’t ask for help because I do not deserve to feel that way!”

For a moment, Kakashi looked like he wanted to continue his tirade, but then he deflated like one of these balloons parents get for their kids on a holiday; one moment filled to the brim with helium and the next, slowly releasing said gas into the stratosphere while flattening with every passing second. “I just…” He shrugged, voice meek and flat and so tired, “don’t know anymore.”

“Kakashi, I…” You sighed. Fuck, this situation was a whole-ass mess. How were you supposed to handle this? Of course, you had a pretty educated guess what was happening to Kakashi, and you were pretty sure he was thinking of the same thing already. But you weren’t really in a place where you could just tell him that, right? Because thinking and actually speaking the condition into existence were two completely different things.

“Kakashi”, you started again, all the while still reaching out and gesturing to him to step out from behind the desk, “I understand what you’re going through right now. Better than you might think. But I’m not going to have this conversation right now with you, when you should really be on your way home. Go home. Rest. And tomorrow, we can speak about it in depth, okay?”

“For sure?” 

“Yes. But go home, please.”

For another, horrifyingly long moment, he just stood there. Motionless, with only his eyes scanning your entire body up and down, before he nodded. Slowly, but he did. “Okay. I go home now. Happy?”

“Cut the moody teenager shit with me, Kakashi.”

“Sorry. I just…” His eyes scrunched close, groaning as he did so. “Fuck. I’m an ass.”

“Good. We’re agreeing on one thing.” As you watched how the man packed his things up — he left his laptop on the desk, you noted — you were already trying to puzzle together what to say tomorrow.

Because how could you possibly explain to Kakashi Hatake that he was probably suffering from Burn out? 

[cdsillylilyposting]

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR BEN 10 ALIEN FORCE BELOW

The main reason Lily claims to despise Steven Universe is because it's Nazi propaganda (“out of stupidity, not malicious attempt” Lily tries to claim) since the main character wins the conflict via non-violent means and convinces the enemy to change their ways. Yet this isn’t even the first Cartoon Network show to take such an approach and it's from a show just as popular as Steven Universe if not more so, Ben 10: Alien Force. The first two seasons of the second Ben 10 show have Ben and co battling against the Highbreed a race of xenophobic aliens who wish to exterminate all other life in the universe with Earth being a prime target for their operations as its tech and relative. The Season 2 finale has Ben and Co. head to the Hybrid Homeworld to get them to stop the war by any means necessary after their attempts to repel the invasion from earth end up futile.

When there they learn the Hybrid’s motive for wanting to kill everybody is they’ve become sterile from generations of inbreeding for the sake of genetic purity, with the species are petty enough to want wipe out all life alongside them. Despite Ben being capable of easily wiping out the council thanks to currently having the Omnitrix’s full power unlocked Ben chooses to use The Omnitrix’s power to cure them of their genetic defects rejuvenating the Highbreed race by turning them into Hybrids, sacrficing the coveted Master Control in the process. The Highbreed are at first disgusted but one Ben had healed and befriended at the start of the Season 2, Reiny, convinces them this is the key to their survival. This speech combined with the fact Reiny is technically now the most genetically pure Highbreed causes the council to elect Reiny as the new leader and he calls off the invasion.

From this description alone, you can see a lot of similarities with the Season 5 finale of Steven Universe, the thing Lily uses to justify her hatred and slander of Rebbecca Sugar claiming she’s a Nazi sympathizer. Yet despite Ben 10 eclipsing (or at least rivaling) Steven Universe in popularity, Lily has never brought up the franchise once, despite the Highbreed having FAR more Nazi-coding than The Diamonds. I have a few theories as to why (not all of which being mutually exclusive) but I’m curious about your thoughts:

Lily is so narrow on the media she consumes that she’s really never heard of or watched Ben 10

Lily didn’t think Ben 10 would draw any views given the franchise was in a slump at the peak of her channel. (Original continuity ended in 2014 and the 2017 reboot was seen as mediocre at best, with Ben 10’s fandom not returning to active prominence until the 2020s).

Lily is harsher on characters and creators who are caucasian. While the Ben 10 franchise was created by four white guys the showrunner of Alien Force was the late Dwayne McDuffie who is African American

Lily knew she couldn’t as easily distort facts or rile up people, as the finale of Steven Universe was already divisive even if you discount people who aren’t crazy like Lily. While Alien Force was at one time contentious, the first two seasons are now seen as a sacred cow amongst the fandom, with the finale in particular being seen as a highlight of the franchise. In other words, Lily does hate Ben 10 but knows that the fanbase is too detail-oriented for her to misrepresent stuff

Her hatred of SU is done solely to spite Lizzy since Lizzy was apperently a fan of the show

Well first

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

That message was long goodness

Second i think ypus right a major part of the reason for Lily not covering Ben 10 might include it's clear aim towards the action crowd right off the bat

She gots no interest in action media and yeah it was earlier than her general vid essays days but WHO KNOWS really

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

Storer and Calo make each other better at this

S3 was imbalanced.

It was all Storer no Calo -or very little Calo-. She was not as involved in the writing as in S2.

She focused mostly on her EP duty.

Maybe it's because she’s involved in the pre-prod of other Disney projects right now, which started right after award season 2023.

So she had a lot on her plate, she had to prioritize, and writing + producing was too time-consuming so she picked EP. Plus EP is better paid than writing. Let’s be real. She chose wisely, I guess…

But it wasn’t just her that deserted the WR. I’m 100% sure the writers’ team changed from S2.

And you can tell the lack of Caloness. It’s all Storer’s sadism. No balance.

You can call it softness + intensity, or two fires with different levels of ignition, as Ayo said about her character and Jeremy’s. The point is that Calo balanced Storer out.

Without her he’s a 3 y.o. with too many fucking crayons, Uncle Jimmy would say.

She brought in the romantic element.

Storer, the intensity and the chaos.

She was the red string that connected Sydcarmy.

Storer and Calo S&C, btw are like Syd and Carmy.

They make each other better at this.

When they are disconnected, so are Carmy and Syd and they are not as good apart as they are when they are together.

I checked and most eps lack the WRITTEN by xxxx or SCREENPLAY by xxxx credit. Most of them just mentioned the Director and EP or one or the other, but we have no idea who was really responsible for that script, which is shady and kinda backs up my idea that the WR is 100% different now, they let in a bunch of writers that were not there before and have 0 knowledge of the mythology of the show and the characters. No idea about the vibe and the subtext that were there in S1 and 2. So they watched the show a couple of times and started writing for these characters from scratch. AND YOU CAN TELL! The characters didn’t sound like themselves in some scenes, they sounded OOC, especially my man, Carmy! And even Syd sometimes. IT WAS THE NEW WRITERS ON THE BLOCK’S FAULT! I’M TELLING YOU! They shoulda made NO CHANGES, the same WR they had in S2 shoulda have remained untouched. Identical. They fucked up big time, changing that and then the Editors fully fucked it, bc they coulda soften the blow, but didn’t. All of this was signed off by Storer and Calo. Storer is not the same Storer without her. And Calo was otherwise engaged.

I expected better, I expected the winning team to remain the same but they changed it and Disney is probably to blame for that. It was a self-boycot, sure. But not Storer’s. It was ultimately Disney’s because the network saw a Golden Team and decided to make them multitask and diversify, and they got greedy. They wanted them to make a lot of BEARS for them. And they couldn’t. Then again, those were nothing but my own expectations.

Now, if I detach myself from those and analyze this season objectively, like I have on some previous occasions, if I remove my own expectations from the equation, I can easily identify amazing stuff such as the constant battle between man and beast that Storer wants to portray. I mentioned time and time again how Carmy is 100% not based on a chef friend of his, as he said in several interviews, no way. Carmy is Storer and Storer is Carmy and that’s the best guarantee that we, truthers have, of Carmy having a happy ending. I’m sure that happiness will definitely include Sydney. So, summing up, we’re cool. Let’s just be patient and don’t let this sadist fuck with our patience. In the meantime let’s focus on the great things this season had.

Let’s choose to let it go and be positive, as Cousin would say.

This show constantly inspires me to take a good hard look at art as a whole and my own relationship with it. I mean, art in any form. I’m not an artist per se, but I certainly am an avid art consumer and fully believe that life would have no meaning without it. So, having said that Storer’s art is always inviting me to broaden my perspective because whether I like it or not how he does it, he usually pushes the boundaries of writing, storytelling, and cinematography, and also tells a story through music in a very personal way, etc, One of the things I loved the most this season was the cinematography and noticing he found inspo in paintings, painters, etc. I mentioned this season was Carmy’s blue period, like Picasso’s, etc… Storer does that, and last but not least, he put front and center a topic that is often not well depicted on TV, which is MENTAL HEALTH and indirectly, COMPASSION, EMPATHY, LOVE but from a non-romantic perspective. From a human perspective. Not platonic, bigger than that, human. S3 was also about SOLIDARITY if you think about it. And that, in and of itself, is something beautiful.

So, thank you, Storer.

[ms-scarletwings]

Media Musin’ Monday, #7:

Screw You, Nickalodeon: Making Fiends Deserved Better

I have no idea how anyone could seriously believe that the entertainment industrial complex™ even tries anymore to hold the illusion of a just or meritocratic realm. No holds barred, I have my issues with about every company still clinging like barnacles to the tragic, sinking ship that cable TV has become, but if you want me to point to a network that’s given me an entire skeleton of bones to pick by this point, and I’m underlining Nickelodeon in red at the top of my list.

It’s not because they host some bad shows, no. It’s not a sour grapes reaction to the untimely end of some of my favorite shows either, and though the entire rotten apple situation with creators like Dan Schneider and Butch Hartman certainly added to barrel’s spoilage, I would still feel every bit of my disdain for Nick’s tv group for the one cardinal sin they have committed again and again and again to ad nauseum- their ongoing phase of running a talent slaughterhouse.

It sounds hyperbolic, but I’d call it a fair observation: Spongebob is widely aknowledged as legitimately both the best and the worst thing to happen to this corner of kid’s media, hands down, but I don’t blame the little yellow guy one bit. He’s only another victim to the mess, and as much as I would love to go on a whole dossier spiel of the history of Nickalodeon from the 90s “golden age” to a full list of the dozens of shows and creators their execs have royally fucked over in the name of chasing the ratings dragon… for one, that’s been done a hundred times by other people at this point, and much better than I could. For two, that would take all freaking day. Just off the top of any cartoon savvy person’s head you’d vaguely recall the assassination of Legend of Korra, El Tigre, or Invader Zim, but that can is filled with so many “blink and you’ll miss it” smaller shows that were barely given two steps out of the starting gate, it pads down an entire TVTropes article on the subject. Dozens of them, shows that Nick all but basically set up for failure before quietly shipping them to the peaceful farm upstate- by which I mean shuffled off to inconsistent time blocks and lower priority channels so they could burn out their final approved episodes in hospice. Nicktoons alone garnered a hell of a reputation for exactly what I’m talking about, but that’s show biz, or… something.

Their worst and probably most audacious offense of all? Let me tell you about the fate of the charming world of a little girl who made fiends.

There’s no better place to talk about the end than the beginning.

Making Fiends, I mean, the original Making Fiends was a series of flash-animated shorts among a handful of other early 2000s web cartoons made by Amy Winfrey.

✨ Just, in case you didn’t recognize or feel something for that name, Amy Winfrey is one of the utter beasts of cartoons in general, not purely kids’ media. Songwriter, directing, animation, screenwriting, voice acting… you name a part of the process, and she’s probably dipped her toe in there at some point. Professionally, she broke into the industry contributing work to earliest season of South Park, and while she personally is most known for and associated with Making Fiends, the likely most prominent body of work she’s been a part of would be Bojack Horseman, wherein she’s credited as a director for many of its strongest episodes, including (but not limited to):

- “Free Churro”

- “The Telescope”

- "Sunk Cost and All That"

- “The View from Halfway Down”

- Amy Winfrey and her spouse (Peter Merryman) making a cameo appearance in the BJH episode “sunk cost and all that”

And even before all of that, she’s been at this animation stuff since the 90s and it shows in a loaded up portfolio of accolades and projects, both professional and personal.

The relevance of this information is to help put in some perspective to just how rotten of a deal she comparatively got with Nickelodeon, when one of those passion creations got a chance to join the network’s airing list.

But to sum up the idea of the web series proper, it independently released 24 short episodes in total, each centered around the antics of two girls engaged in both a completely one sided friendship and nemesis-ship. The show’s namesake refers to the single action the evil little Vendetta is most known for- creating a variety of servant monsters, many of which she uses to secure her rule over the port town of Clamburg, and all its inhabitants. Charlotte, on the other hand, is the quintessential “children’s show” character: near inhumanly kind, cheerful, and naive. So much so that she’s oblivious to her “best friend’s” near daily attempts to murder her, or the fact that she, you know, despises her.

In 2006, Nickelodeon took an interest in Winfrey’s toon and the prospect of adapting it into a TV series, reportedly because a daughter of a studio employee was a huge fan.

And fun fact btw, this was actually the first time that Nick did this approach of turning an indie web animation into one of their shows, but it certainly wasn’t the last if you remember this was also the origin of Breadwinners.

And as far as the audience was concerned, it was quite the successful transition! The TV version pretty much kept all of the major beats and vibes of the original, with polished animation, the same voice actors, and some stylistic upgrades to the art/environmental designs. For a brief time, it was the highest rated thing on its release channel too. Someone I don’t quite recall the name of once endearingly referred to the show as “baby’s first grimdark” and I adore how fitting of a summary that is. It sports a charmingly unique art style, memorable soundtrack, and I can swear to y’all, the humor aged like a fine wine.

“Why don’t you pretend to be dead?”

“:) ok!”

*slam*

(Also, sidenote, the entire series is still up on your tube, in HD, completely free to watch!)

So, if it’s such a neat little show, then why on earth does barely a soul seem to remember it existing? And even fewer scare who recall knowing about the show during its 2008 release?

Because Nickelodeon Studios, without hyperbole, set this show up for failure at every single turn before it even got a fighting chance.

People know of some shows that Nick treated like garbage, but this one they treated like absolute shit for reasons I can’t fathom.

Making Fiends, for one, never actually saw the light of day on the main network channel, as per the original plans. It was actually instead delegated over to Nick’s sister channel, Nicktoons, by a last minute decision.

Nicktoons, fyi, was not carried by most cable packages. I obviously lived on it as a kid, and it was functionally to Nick what I remember Boomerang being to Carton Network- the cable block where reruns of much older but loved shows were shoveled off to once they finished their days on the main channel.

Second, it was quietly premiered with barely a couple farts of advertising, too. I remember maybe seeing one preview as a kid, on Nicktoons.

And I guess, not keeping either of these in mind, Nick then abruptly pulled the plug on the whole thing, citing the tried and true “low ratings” explanation and leaving it at that.

Not counting years of post-cancelation reruns, the show actively ran from October 4, 2008, to November 1, 2008.

That is roughly a month between premiere and the end production date.

One season. Six entire episodes.

Seven whole additional completed scripts abandoned on the table.

Yeah.

I’m a touch salty about it still.

And with the shutting down of the Nicktoons network social media in 2018, any additional acknowledgment of the show from Nickelodoen themselves has kind of vanished to my knowledge. Like, it’s almost no wonder you already had to be part of the cult following to know about it, when Nick has been quiet about the calf they sent to auction since. Worst part is, they still hogged the rights to the show instead of idk, wild idea, giving it back over to Winfrey. I can only imagine people get away with entire reuploads of the series under the otherwise very IP protective Nick’s nose as another display of how low and bastardly those execs really view Making Fiends.

And that sucks! Wow! But I guess in a “be happy it happened, not sad it ended” way, I’m kind of glad for the fact that we can still enjoy and pass around the show that we did get to experience at all, rather than see it fade into true lost media territory.

Even today, about 16 whole years later, I know for a fact there are still plenty of other fans that remember and cherish the splash this tiny show made in that big, brutal pond. So, in that manner, you can’t truly call Making Fiends dead and gone.

A bittersweet story to think about, and only one of many down a long list, but ultimately one I’m happy to be able to tell at all.

Even if all the while still raising a giant middle finger to the network for the ending.

[hotforharrison]

I watched the YouTube video of the podcast for Harrison’s pretty face and took some notes, but honestly not a lot about how Carbon Fingerprint does things or other environmental stuff the hosts brought up because that's not what I'm interested in. (What I'm interested in being Harrison and his pretty face.)

The first thing I’ll say, even though it wasn’t the first thing in the podcast, is that we have hope for Harrison acting in things in the future when he gets roles! He said he’ll always want to be an actor and that it’s his first passion and will always take the number one spot. He had two auditions in January! Fingers crossed something works out for him soon, and we get to see it later this year.

The audio on that podcast was repeatedly fucked up and weird. Fortunately, most of what Harrison seems to have said was clear.

He likes to go on walks without his phone to unplug and has trouble with clearing his mind and getting all the thoughts to quiet down, which is what he thinks of as being “unplugged.”

He finds acting easier than being himself. He’s not an extrovert and doesn’t like to talk about his feelings and things like that. He was nervous doing the podcast because he didn’t know what they were going to ask and couldn’t prepare in advance.

His company, Carbon Fingerprint, did a 3 hour walk without phones. It wasn’t like reaching for your phone when there’s a lull in conversation to just check it for nothing in particular, which Harrison naturally does. People were actually talking and not being caught up in a hectic, busy world. He later says he'd love if people came on the future walks Carbon Fingerprint is scheduling, so I guess if you're in London and want to meet Harrison without your phone lol

When he got the role of Snowden in Catch-22, he thought about just reading his character chapter, but it was at the end so he ended up reading the whole book.

He mentioned his love of wildlife and how cool it was to go on his trip to Antarctica. (I desperately want to go to the zoo with this man.)

He now views Instagram as something for work, and that most people are lovely, and he tries not to see the negative comments or DMs, but he sometimes does anyway and it’s a hit to your confidence to see people being mean like some are.

He likes going to events to network more than he used to because he is more himself and it’s less of a performance. They were tough to start off with trying to make connections to help his career, but now it's easier.

He said that in acting opportunities don’t make themselves and you have to put in the effort and make your own luck, and that you can be very talented and still need to be very lucky to succeed and that he was still learning that.

He finds learning lines easy, but he also improvised himself into not getting a role he went to 4 auditions for because he kind of rewrote the script with a friend and forgot how the original actually went.

He feels the most who he is with his family, especially through the trials of acting and all the rejection you go through.

When he models, he makes a character in his head who would wear those clothes and be more extroverted than he is and makes a playlist for that character and blasts it.

[canonicallysoulmates]

J2 Chicon Gold Panel 2023

The boys are looking gorgeous, Jared's hair has gotten longer and is so fluffy it’s very Sam Winchester 😍 

Let’s hop right into the questions!

The first one isn't really a question it’s a fan letting them know what they'd like to see in a 16th season which is pretty much everything but the kitchen sink including the Walkerverse cast making guest appearances. Jensen says that would be an interesting challenge to pull off, he’s not sure how that would work. Jared says he’s gonna be really honest that now that he’s gainfully unemployed for the foreseeable future he’s thought it’d be fun to start trying to think of stuff but legitimately they can’t talk to writers because of the strike, they can’t have creative conversations right now but hopefully they [the writers] come to terms that are agreeable for everybody and they can start developing it while still looking like Sam and Dean. Jensen echoes that, and says that they have some time on their hands and think let’s make some phone calls then remembers they can’t, nobody will take their calls right now because everybody’s on strike. x

There were a lot of little nods to different shows in SPN, what other shows would they have liked to have given a nod to in the show?

Jared says it would have been fun to show up on TVD or Arrow, that they had buddies on all sorts of networks. Jensen says that they would always joke about the last episode of TVD just being the Impala rolling into town, and they often joke too about Sam and Dean showing up on TWD and just dealing with zombies in such an easy way by just walking away from them and they give an example of this, he also says that some didn’t even have lower halves they were just crawling how does that pose a threat to anything- I don't watch Walking Dead but I know those zombies have evolved so I wouldn't be so confident about being able to just walk away from them boys  x

Were there any characters, like guest stars, that they wish had had a bigger role?

Jared answers that it would have been great to have JDM around more, and he thinks JDM wanted to be around but Grey’s Anatomy picked him up before they could, Grey’s made an offer and SPN didn’t know where s1 was going yet, and although selfishly he would have like to have had the dynamic of dad and sons more it’s kind of perfect for what the story became; looking at the show as a whole it’s like well that’s great cause it made Jared as Sam kinda want his dad more without being willing to say it so when they had JDM come back and at this point he starts laughing as he recalls that he hit Jeffrey in the balls by mistake which he says was the most epic shot in all years of SPN. Seriously, if you have somehow not seen that blooper look it up it's so funny.

Jensen would say there are kinda two lists. There are actors they would love to have come back and then there’s the list of the characters they would love to have come back and a lot of times they coincide for instance an actor and character he would have liked to have had explore the story more is Benny. He was such a unique character in that situation especially given that Dean has always been so black and white about if it’s a monster it had to die and here you have somebody who was a monster but was also a friend to him so he thought that posed some really good issues. But ultimately it’s a show about two brothers and that’s where it always kinda came back to; Jared mentions Sully, Jensen agrees, says again both the actor and the character were fantastic. 

They ask the fan who they would have liked more of and the fan replies Charlie, Jensen says to have her more involved with the brothers story would have been great. x

If they could add another ep to SPN what would it be about?

Jensen would have just added one scene, in the scene where Sam and Dean get out of the Impala next to the barn when they go into the fight he would have just had Dean put on a backpack. Would have just added that little nugget. So it would have been like ow instead of 💀

Jared says they should have had an alternate ending where Jensen was like 'oh that could have been bad', and Jensen says were the rebar would have gone in the space between his arm and his torso.

Jensen feels like they did every episode imaginable, they did a musical episode, they did an episode with dancing like Fred Astire, they did one from the car’s POV there wasn’t a lot left unturned after 15 seasons. 

A fan screams out gender swap and they reply they did a body swap but Jared adds that while he thinks it would have been amazing to do a gender swap and he bets the writers probably thought about it to be brutally honest he thinks it would have been really difficult to try and make sure that everybody knew it was in good fun, that they weren’t making fun of men or women. Fans would have known but maybe a broader audience wouldn’t have. x

What’s been their favorite fan interaction?

Jared can’t think of a specific instance off hand but something that has happened a couple of times is he’ll get the chance to talk to a fan and they’re with a friend and it seems like they’ve known each other their whole lives and they’ll be like ‘yeah we met on a chatline 5yrs ago, then met up at a con 2yrs ago and we’re best friends’. So seeing connection just seeing how the show has helped not just people enjoy it by themselves but strengthen their relationships. Sidenote: chatline my boy 😂

Jensen shares that Make-A-Wish would go to their set maybe like once or twice a year and that’s always a real treat and they try to make it as special as possible but the’s one that will always stand out to him and he doesn’t know if he can get through it without getting emotional but there was a youg lady about 13-14 yrs old and she had Leukimia or something- it was terminal and she went with her family, and her dad who was a firefighter he had a really beautiful ornate tattoo on his arm that was like a rose that went down to where he was holding it that represented her essentially but what really stood out about that visit was that he pulled them aside and he said through tears that there’s only so much that he can do as a father for his daughter but the smiles that they bring her on a daily basis when she watches their show that’s something he can’t bring and so he hugged them and said thank you for making his daughter smile even though she was dying essentialy, and that meant a lot to he and Jared and it’s one of those things that's like 'oh what we do here it does truly affect people', and there’s a saying in the industry 'we’re not curing cancer' and they’re not but what they might be doing is giving somebody a little bit of hope, giving somebody an escape from dealing with that; it just really hit home for him, it means a lot and it left a big impression. 😭

If they were a muppet which muppet would they be?

Jared would be Big Bird. Jensen would be Oscar the Grouch. And here’s your fun fact of the day, because when Jared answered Big Bird Jensen said that’s Sesame Street not Muppets before the fan said it counted, and it does because Sesame Street characters are technically Muppets! They were created by Jim Henson, and over the years there were actually crossovers between the Muppets and Sesame Street characters my personal favorite instance of this is the Muppet Family Christmas special from '87. And if you wanna bawl your eyes out you can see Big Bird pay homage to Jim Henson in his memorial by singing It’s Not Easy Being Green, both the Christmas special and that are available on youtube. x

Back to the boys, knowing what they know now were they to go to school tomorrow where would they go? And for what?

Jared quips the fan might not be far off because their industry is a little interesting right now. He thinks if he could go back to school there’s so much he’d love to learn, so many things he’s fascinated with he wishes there were 11 of him that could go and earn different degrees. One of the things he’s fascinated by is history and he thinks he would learn a lot about people and himself even from history, and that’s kinda what he tends to read is historical nonfiction, as of right now that would be his answer but ask him tomorrow and he might say French 😆 But he would love to learn more about history.

Jensen doesn’t know maybe a mechanics class, or they were just talking a little bit that morning about neuroscience and it’s just kinda fascinating what we know and what we don’t know about how the human brain works and functions, and another fascinating thing too is astrophysics. He says he and Jared were talking about this last night at which point Jared says Jensen has them in a rabbit hole but basically it was a conversation between Neil deGrasse Tyson and another astrophysicist and he was asking of what we can see and what we know of the universe how much has been researched in the last 50 years, and the professor said that if you were to take the universe and make it the size of the oceans on earth what we know and what we can see would be the equivalent of a 12oz glass of ocean water, and so if you were to say is there life out there well what we can see is no but that would be like taking your glass of water out of the ocean and being like there's no fish so that must mean there’s no fish in the ocean but clearly that’s not true, and Jensen finds that mindblowing.

Jared jokes this is why you don't want to be friends with Jensen cause you stay up all night trying to figure out what the hell he just showed you. x

J2 Chicon Gold Panel

[musclesandhammering]

aside from anderson cooper do you mind giving us your Thoughts on other pundits/journalists?

Oooh boy. I love you for indulging my 2 decade-old hyperfixation.

Well first off, I don’t actually watch much legacy media for news purposes. They all have the same corporate slant and, while I don’t hold it against the individual pundits/journalists, I’m aware that the info they’re presenting is highly cherry-picked and biased toward the establishment and teaming with false neutrality bs so.. you know.

I got started watching cnn because I remembered being a little kid and seeing Anderson Cooper on tv when my parents were watching Katrina coverage or whatever. So I started watching him and then went back and watched some older stuff etc so… he was the initial deal. I just sort of started following other pundits for fun because of their proximity to him.

Also, disclaimer that I strongly prefer his older tv persona (war reports, snarkiness, grunge aesthetic, etc) and most of the PRT fandom content I’ve found has been from like 2005-2010 anyway so… most of these opinions are based on an outdated media sphere lol.

With all that being said…

When it comes to semi-modern stuff, I love the whole cnn crew. I think they’d be hilarious in a mocumentary a la The Office or something. John Berman is the funniest guy on the network and Jake Tapper has the best deadpan. Don Lemon was annoying and endearing at the same time. I never liked Chris Cuomo. He seemed pretension and way too dudebro-ish.

As far as PRT people specifically, Stephen Colbert is an absolute treasure. He’s ridiculously smart and quick witted but he’s never needlessly harsh like some late night hosts. I like him now better than when he was on The Colbert Report because he doesn’t have to play a character all the time and can just outright say what he feels.

Jon Stewart is probably the most progressive host on mainstream tv, which of course makes him delightful. He also has a way of calling out mainstream journalists without making it personal. And I still remember the time he went on Crossfire and humiliated Tucker Carlson <3.

Rachel Maddow seems like the coolest person in the room at all times and she’s so incredibly smart. But she has this thing where she seems to recognise (and call out) the conservative tendencies of other networks like cnn without realising that msnbc is no better when it comes to corporatism, upholding the status quo, and being anti-progressive. In fact, that’s something everybody on msnbc does, not just her. But I still have a soft spot for her though.

Keith Olbermann is the guy that used to be outspoken leftist champion in the very early 2000s- getting righteously angry when other dems were obsessed with decorum, clapping back at Fox pundits who tried to smear him, and saying things the dem establishment didn’t always want said. But somewhere between then and now he revealed himself to be a weird, immature, somewhat narcissistic asshole who can’t take any criticism and has somehow morphed into a centrist defender. It’s one of the most disappointing downfalls of the fandom. But despite all that, I still think of the day msnbc fired him as a national tragedy.

And I’m glad he got what was coming to him, but from a rpf perspective, I miss when Bill O’Reilly was the main villain 😂.

[brandonxdylan]

Ranking the GAY EPISODES of Beverly Hills, 90210 - Part 1

Pride month may be coming to a close, but I didn’t want to let it slip by without doing a little something special. I thought it would be fun to do an overview of all of the gay-themed storylines from the series. There were quite a few of them over the years (although not as many as there were seasons of the show, which perhaps is saying something), especially considering for a show that didn’t have any significant queer content on a consistent basis, and certainly no gay regulars to speak of. These episodes run the gamut from throwaway fluff to pretty dark and heavy, and I’m going to rank them in terms of how effectively I think they handle the “gay” element (spoiler alert: not well), as well as how satisfying they are in terms of soapy drama.

I really tried to give these episodes a fair shake, knowing that it would be pointless to judge them for not delivering deeply nuanced takes in an era where we simply were not getting that on prime time network television. I feel like they still mostly fall short, but there’s enough good stuff in here to warrant some genuine consideration.

A couple of caveats before going forward. First of all, some of these episodes deal with some serious themes (AIDS, suicide, gay bashing), so consider yourself trigger warned. Secondly, this post is all in good fun, so lets not take it (or my hot takes) too seriously.

#8.) Crimes and Misdemeanours (Season 8, Episode 19)

Kicking things off, in dead last we have this dud from season 8, which has precisely one, single joke to offer, and still manages to screw it up. Steve runs into a woman at the Peach Pit, and while flirting with her, makes passing reference to Brandon, his “partner.” Obviously, he means business partner, but when she invites Steve and his “boyfriend” Brandon to lunch with she and her “girlfriend,” she clearly means it, and Steve somehow doesn’t think anything of it, and is all to happy to report to Brandon that he snagged them an awesome double date. At lunch, the two “couples” somehow get through the entire meal just beating around the bush, with the women (obviously lesbians by this point) clearly referring to Brandon and Steve as a couple, but these dummies of course don’t pick up on any of this out of sheer dimwittery and, I don’t know, super thick hetero-goggles or something. No, it’s not until Steve and Brandon are invited to the women’s apartment for dinner (which Steve expects to be an orgy, because of course he does) and they’re literally staring at the one bed shared by both women that either of them start to realize what’s really going on. Gay panic ensues, and the whole thing is played for laughs (not that there are any). I’m a sucker for these ridiculous sicomy setups involving misunderstandings and misplaced romantic interest, and this show can occasionally do them well (the luau episode from season 10 is a fabulous example of this, and also has some fun gay content - more on that later), but the problem is none of this is funny or surprising. Neither is it insensitive or exploitative. It’s just kind of stupid. The reveal can be seen coming a mile away, and the whole episode is just buildup to what I’ll generously call the punchline. A better show would’ve done a lot more with this, maybe playing with the concept of Steve seeing heterosexuality as the default, and being blind to other possibilities. Ideally, it also would have had more than one joke.

#7.) Comic Relief/Santa Knows (Season 8, Episodes 13-14)

David takes a job at a car wash, where he notices a bunch of his coworkers making very boring and unimaginative gay jokes about a young male employee named Ben who lives in the garage’s office due to the fact that his dad kicked him out for being gay. David confronts Ben’s parents in the hopes of getting them to see the error of their ways, but the interaction ends with Ben’s dad choosing to declare that “I don’t have a son,” rather than accept Ben for who he is. It’s really harsh, but in dad’s defense, David has very little tact, and it’s really none of his business considering he met Ben five minutes ago. In spite of this, Ben still holds out hope for a reconciliation. While his mom is somewhat more receptive than his dad, she still tells Ben that it’s for the best that he give his dad time to cool down. David once again intervenes, asking Ben’s mom - a woman who is very clearly deeply torn between her love for her son and her need to grant her husband the authority he commands - why she can’t just explain to her husband why taking Ben back in is the right thing to do, as if it’s just that easy. And that’s really the problem with this storyline. It deals with some really dark and emotionally complicated subject matter, and it’s just so glaringly obvious that telling this story from the perspective of a detached outsider is not the best way to approach it. Especially considering it’s David, whose track record for empathy and compassion is fucking zero. Give this to someone like Steve, which would allow him to experience some emotional growth alongside Ben’s parents, or Valerie, who has her own history of familial turmoil (though she does pop up later in this episode and isn’t much more helpful than David, so maybe scratch that one). All of this proves to be too much for Ben to take, and David discovers that he plans to slit his wrists. This is where Val gets involved, as she and David basically just berate Ben into not hurting himself, with Val insisting that she understands Ben’s particular struggles more than she actually does or possibly could. They both give him the “tough love” treatment which, hey, is maybe not what this kid whose parents openly hate him actually needs. Still, it all ends up somewhat happily because of course all Ben and his parents really needed was for someone from the gang to show up out of nowhere and yell at them a bit in order to figure their shit out. This is a story worth telling, but coming at it from the perspective of someone who has nothing to do with it doesn’t allow for much depth. And it really doesn’t satisfy as a soapy plot line either. Even that would require more of an investment from the viewer, and we simply don’t have time or reason to suddenly be all in on this character who comes out of nowhere for two episodes and then disappears forever. Ultimately, this story is just too bleak and depressing to be much fun, and too shallow to be emotionally satisfying.

#6.) Summer Storm (Season 2, Episode 3)

This isn’t ranked low because it’s a bad episode. On the contrary, it’s actually a pretty good episode from one of the show’s best seasons, and builds on one of the show’s most iconic storylines - namely, Brenda and Dylan. However, that doesn’t really concern us here. What does concern us is the B story, about how Kelly meets a cute volleyball player named Kyle. They flirt a bit and eventually go on a date, but when Kelly starts putting the moves on Kyle, he suggests they cool it. Spoiler alert, it’s because he (sort of) comes out as gay later in the episode. But even if he didn’t, Kelly’s reaction to this is really weird. She takes it oddly personally that he doesn’t want to get naked with her on the first date, and gives him the cold shoulder the next day. I haven’t watched these early seasons in several years now but I guess Kelly’s always been a pouty drama queen. Anyway, Kyle does eventually confide in Kelly, telling her that he’s tried to be into girls, and that he genuinely likes her, but that he knows they can’t be more than friends. It’s kind of cute, and Kyle’s conundrum is a pretty common one. Though it’s definitely possible to assume he doesn’t come out as fully gay because the show didn’t want to go too far, it’s also kind of nice to get a portrayal of a character in the process of figuring out his sexuality, without any clear resolution. That is how it works in real life sometimes after all. But considering this is such a minor storyline and the queer content is pretty tepid, it’s hard to rank this any higher than I have it.

#5.) Baby, You Can Drive My Car/Family Tree (Season 10, Episodes 8-9)

Dylan meets with a guy named Andrew, who is one of the directors of a local community centre for kids, in order to discuss making a hefty donation. Andrew makes passing reference to an ex-boyfriend, which prompts a discussion about how Andrew has to remain closeted among co-workers out of fear of losing his job. He knows that there are some bigots out there who would have some not-so-great feelings about a gay man working with their kids (that old chestnut), and his co-director is apparently one of them. Dylan tries to reason that “hey, it’s the 90s,” and that Andrew shouldn’t have to be closeted for those reasons. Andrew, of course, knows better, and while he agrees that no, he shouldn’t have to, the fact remains that he does. To demonstrate that at least he accepts Andrew for who he is, Dylan puts his arm around him in a playful (yet platonic way). Unfortunately, this happens in a dark parking lot and within the presence of a group of homophobes whom proceed to attack Dylan and Andrew with a baseball bat. While Dylan manages to wrestle the bat away from one of the guys (sure) and escapes with just a few bumps and bruises, Andrew doesn’t get off quite as easy. Dylan’s eager to spill details to the cops, but Andrew refuses, on the grounds that he not only doesn’t want to drag this whole unpleasant incident out any further, but he also doesn’t want to draw any more attention that might put him (and his job) at further risk. Andrew’s fears prove to be perfectly justified when, through circumstance, his co-director, Patsy, finds out anyway, and suggests Andrew take a (permanent) leave of absence. As is always the case with this show when there’s a Gay in trouble, a member of the gang makes it their problem to solve, and so Dylan confronts Patsy about Andrew being let go. Although Andrew specifically tells Dylan that he doesn’t want his help, fearing that pushing his luck with Patsy is just going to make things more public and humiliating, Dylan says that he can’t justify donating to a bigoted organization, and he threatens to pull his funding if Patsy doesn’t agree to hire Andrew back. She reluctantly relents, allowing Andrew to return to work, but she pulls her son from Andrew’s basketball team, and soon enough, more kids start to drop out for the same reasons. As things escalate, Andrew decides that if his presence is going to detract from the mission of the centre - to provide care and support for kids - then he should quit. However, Dylan swoops in with one more ace up his sleeve. He talks to Patsy’s son directly, and gets him to question whether he really is uncomfortable with Andrew, or if it’s just his mother’s influence that’s making him think that way. This works, and all of the kids who had previously dropped out assure Andrew that they not only want him there, but they need him there. All in all, this is a decent storyline, but it does engage with a few tropes that rub me the wrong way. First of all, it’s never not at least a little annoying to watch straight characters sanctimoniously decide that doing their version of “the right thing” is more important than respecting the wishes of the gay characters whose safety and livelihood is what’s actually at risk, and this storyline is a pretty egregious example of that. It also follows the usual 90210 pattern of having characters just badger others relentlessly until they conveniently get their way. Granted, this case gets a bit of a pass in that regard, because the tirade that Dylan fires at Patsy is kind of satisfying, and Luke Perry is a good enough actor to make it feel properly motivated and believable. We do love an ally king.

Watch for Part 2!

[doublegoblin]

A year and some change in retrospective

Okay so technically It’s like a year and 2 months and like a day. While I made the account and started posting things in November of 2022 I made my intro post on the 23rd of Jan last year so that’s when I’m going to count myself as having officially joined lol. I got thinking about this on my way into work today and I got a little reflective. I’m going to be kind of rambling (what else is new lol) but it dawned on me that, damn dude, a whole year is still like 300+ days and life can go wild directions. I also figured this may be nice for the newer people who have started to follow me (hello and thank you btw). Things won’t necessarily be in chronological order, I mean they might, but, I’m also liable to jump around.

So let’s start with some backstory, all good stories start with backstory yeah?

Me and my -at the time- bf(we’re still together lol just fiance now) were on our way to my aunt's wedding…running late actually because I had the day wrong and blah blah blah. To kill time on the 3hr car ride I started to spit ball this idea for a story I had brewing, that would then become Rituals and Red Tape. I was writing it for myself for a while as a way to deal with being let go from my last job. Well I then had the silly idea to maybe share this with people, so then we get to November and I make a profile and start posting.

That’s right, I started my path on here to be someone putting out original works of writing. I mean, if you go to my profile and check out the pinned post you’d know this but let’s be real, nobody really does that lol. And as those of you putting out original stuff also know, it can be pretty quiet at first. I had in my mind that I was just going to have my stuff on my blog, maybe reblog writing stuff only; that uh…didn’t last long. I’ve met some pretty cool people on here, even if we never really talk I’m happy to see your stuff cross my dash. It was the whole song and dance of you follow me and I follow you, support network stuff. Took part in tag games, an OC fighting tourney thing, and just some other fun things. All the while I’m posting little one-offs, a new WIP here and there…that I eventually just kinda stop working on in favor of my first child. 

I make a Wattpad and start posting what could be considered the 1.5 draft of the story. Things are fun, quiet, but fun

I start to engage in more fandom related things, because why not?

Then something happens, something that I didn’t think would take me in the direction I am going now.

I buy a $30 mic.

Voice acting and acting in general were always a passion of mine as a kid, and with a new stable job and comfy living I thought it was time to revisit some old joy. What was even better is that an artist I was following had a “casting call” for an animation she was working on. So with my little microphone and audacity(the program lol) I do the thing that changed my blog, I tried out…and I got a little part! I’ve never really been one to yearn for the spotlight but I took a chance and it worked out, and I was hooked after that.

So I started to use that mic more and more. First recording a short story of my own, recording a short story by a pal, then…well I guess you can call it doing some dub work.

Now in the past I had people follow me just out of the blue, but, with the first Five Pebbles recording it started to happen more and more. And those posts, well, they were getting some attention. Not a lot mind you, but like, more than the original works. Now I don’t say this with anger or bitterness, it’s just how stuff like this works out. So with what I thought was going to be a one-off thing, I knew I wanted to keep doing it. Yes the notoriety was fun, but more so, I was making something that was bringing people joy. So I recorded more, and more people saw it and liked it, reblogged it too.

Then I had that funny little idea. Something new to me that scratches a few itches at once. If you’ve followed me for THIS you know, the Kel Logs. Not only was I playing a game that I really enjoy(btw if you haven’t you should go play the game it is fun and but I won’t bog this down with info dumping), but I was doing some original writing and voice acting. It was the perfect storm.

Now I know I’m not the most well known person out there and this little fan fiction project isn’t like super famous, which I’m very okay with lol, but like the comments and stuff show I was having an impact on people in a small way. And it was having an effect on me, I was becoming more comfortable with my voice. Not going to sour the mood too much but I’ve struggled with voice dysphoria for a while and the joy I am able to bring people is so important to me, which I know sounds selfish.

So now here we are in the present, I know I’ve missed some stuff and simplified others, with people following me for fandom things and all that jazz. I thank every single one of you. Whenever my stuff get reblogged I do try my best to say something in the comments to those who say things in tags lol, sometimes tumblr won’t let me @ you but know I try. You all have no idea how much it means that I can bring joy to you and I don’t feel I can pay you all back other than to keep doing what I’m doing.

I haven’t worked on my original stuff in a while but I don’t think I’ll be tossing it to the side. In fact I know I won’t. I have a story I want to tell and it will be. So if you have any interest, please check it out and let me know what you all think. I want to always improve but I can’t know where to patch things up if I don’t hear about a leak lol. I’m getting super rambly so I’m gonna stop this here.

1 year later and I’ve gone from solely original writing to a strange hybrid of that and fandom stuff, and I couldn’t be happier with where I am.

So once again, thank you all so much for liking what I do and I hope to keep bringing you things to make you feel emotions.