#and the perception my entire family has of me and who i am and every dynamic i have irl for the worse.

[eclipsecrowned]

ok, jester's hat is off.

i'm on an edge due to my dad's health and an unrelated incident today just ripping out my mental stability at the root. i'm not well, things aren't looking so hot in terms of coming back from this. i'm likely to be either taking a big step back or throwing myself into the hobby depending on which side of the coin my fucked up brain lands on. i hate to do this as i feel like i only just started getting back into the swing of things but i'm hitting a wall mentally and need to start organizing that space, as it were.

if i do hang around things are likely to turn self indulgent for a minute, i'm likely to be more scarce in dms, i might focus on what's short/gives the fastest returns in terms of effort vs results. it isn't me playing favorites or trying to alienate anyone, i have just been here before and i know where it ends.

[that-dreaming-dragon]

Alterhuman Community: Anglocentrism and Spirituality

Word count: 636

It's pretty common that the alterhuman community is largely English-speaking.

Or more that the community at large interacts in English.

And beyond that, many things are also US, if not western-centric, possibly due to the nature of the community being English-dominant.

There has been a bit more discussion surrounding this very phenomenon. And it is understandable why we are here with all the points brought up within that post and following reblogs (threads? I don't know my tumblr lingo). The post focused on the identity aspect of alterhumanity, and the languages tied to these identity concepts.

But I'd encounter another issue--where everything else is also tied to anglocentrism. One of them being spiritual belief.

I often felt a little disconnected from many others within the community due to my largely different background. My family and extended family, even beyond, are largely eastern in spirituality and beliefs, with Buddhism being the religion that has a larger presence in my life. Christianity was sort of like a myth to me, horror stories and tales told to me in passing. Not to say there wasn't any education going into that area, but the class about world religion back in high school means the focus is on religion across the world. I had family friends and others in my life that are Christian, not enough for me to understand all that went into such a belief. I was living in a bubble of eastern influenced belief, and then I didn't comprehend what it's like to not have such a background.

The stronger irony is that I didn't learn about the finer details of Christianity until I was knee-deep in the alterhuman community. I'm constantly a bit off-kilter when I talk about spirituality with others, and there's just a bit of a gap with others if things originate too much from earthen-established faith belief. I'm still trying to learn what Pegan and New Age encompass. I mean, they could very well be concepts I am well acquainted, but just in a different cultural lens and language.

Of course, I also need to be aware of how much and how strongly my perspective skews my view on things. I know there are those who share similar backgrounds with me within the community, and the community at large does try to keep a worldly view. Considering many of us are from completely different worlds or realms as well.

Thinking on this, it's a strange place to be. We try to focus on individual experiences without the influence of this earthen realm, but still the importance of society and culture, or everything else that follows, does have impact on our own perception of things. How we see animal through human angle, how we explain our experience with what we had outside the alterhuman scope. We acknowledge that fictionkin, therian, and otherkin are all the same experience by technicality, with different focuses (I need category terms that aren't identify-as focused, fictionfolk (which we have), animalfolk (do people use that?), and otherfolk? nonhumanfolk??). I'm wondering if this is sort of like being from fiction is like. You have something preestablished, that shaped you, and every new understanding is built upon this foundation.

I'm not entirely certain where I'm going with this, ramble as my writings tends to be. Originally I had wanted to answer in specific a Writing Wednesday prompt posted within the Alterhuman Community, specifically in regards to what sort of community project I'd like to see.

Perhaps a zine featuring alterhumanity from non-English earthen culture? I only am proficient in 2.5 languages, but I feel that it'd be beneficial at large. Talon's post inspired and encouraged folks to write in non-English languages they know (I'm not saying Native Language, I have very complicated relation with things like that…), and that is certainly a start. Though we probably will have quite a headache first just in trying to figure out how to translate concept terms.

[ghouljams]

Hi, Ghoul. Apologies for kinda venting (?) on your asks, and please ignore this if you'd like, but how does one cope with the idea (and, quite possibly, reality) of being alone for the rest of their life?

I've never been the most confident individual in my years of being alive. I'm not conventionally attractive, and I've been battling with my perception of self for like, basically my entire life. Never really had romantic relationships, other than unrequited and secret crushes. At first, I thought to myself that I could deal with being alone and unloved in that way, but I figured as I grew older that maybe I'm just trying to be tough about it. I want to have the kind of love that other people have, envious as I may sound. I want to be able to look at myself and think, "wow, despite my flaws, someone still took the risk to get to know me and chose to stay."

Of course, this is not to say that the love my tight-knit circle of friends and family aren't adequate. I'm just curious. And hopeful that someday I get to have that other kind of love.

That said, I really love your works and I am privileged to be able to read them :)) it's always such a delight to see your rambles and reblogs in my dash. <3 Hope everything is going well for you.

Hello my love. You already know I'm going to suggest therapy so I'm going to get that out of the way early.

Here's the meat of it. There are thousands upon millions of people who feel exactly the same way you do and I truly believe this is because of the way western society has structured its media/propaganda. So much of the media we consume is loaded with this idea that romantic love is this totally different thing that will complete your life and show you how worthy you are if only you can find it.

This is a load of horse shit.

One of the unhappiest times of my life was spent in my first relationship. I actually had a harder time loving myself because I was scrambling to prove I was worth being loved by a person who liked me in theory but in practice frequently flaked on dates and didn't care about my emotional wellbeing.

I say all of that because I had your same attitude of "despite my flaws they're choosing to stay with me" and ultimately she left me. Over text. It was a whole thing.

So many of you talk about being "old" and "destined to be alone" and you're like 25. Hell even if you're 50, people find love at any age, but the only way to find anyone good is to be comfortable with the fact that romantic love isn't the end all be all of love. You can fall in love with anyone, that doesn't make it a good relationship. It just means you're in love.

Also what do you mean "someone took the risk?" Are you a serial killer? Do you set fire to police cars? You sell meth? What risk do you pose to anyone? You're sad and have low self esteem. So what? That makes you a risky prospect? Your flaws of *checks notes* talking down about yourself is such a huge hurdle that it's a grave danger to anyone that wants to date you?

And I'm sorry I feel like I'm getting sort of mean but you got me in older sibling mode with this and so you're getting big sister shit.

I just- like if you truly believe that you are such a burden to date then you aren't going to get what you want out of a relationship. You'll become obsessed with the first person that reciprocates your affections and it will spiral into something that hurts you. I am speaking from experience.

My dear, i am a stranger on the internet, and I love you. This world is cruel towards tender hearts and disappointment hides in every corner, but we keep loving the world and the people in it anyway. Love finds us when we least expect it, and if you truly want that sort of love it will come to you.

But I need you to be kinder to yourself. I know you said you struggle with self image. Stop measuring yourself against other people. Stop setting up goal posts for your life. Stop thinking your flaws make you some undateable ghoul. They make you, you, and whoever you date will love you for them not in spite of them.

[slaymitchabernathy]

Mr. & Mrs. Snow

“Ladies and gentleman, I am pleased to introduce to you, Mr. and Mrs. Snow.”

The applause they receive is thunderous as they stroll into the ballroom, her dainty hand wrapped around his arm. Coriolanus holds his head high as he leads him and his wife to the center of the room where they’ll once again be the center of attention.

Just how he likes it.

“As is the tradition, the newlywed couple will now share their first dance.”

The orchestra strikes up a tune that’s all too familiar to Coriolanus who has been dragged to one too many dance lessons by his wife who insisted that they learn a proper routine.

But after bearing witness to several pitiful first dances, he’s glad that she pushed for them to repeat the same steps over and over again until he could do them in his sleep.

He leads them through the waltz tremendously well for such a tall and broad man, a man who’s known for his power and authority, not his dancing.

But that all melts away when it comes to her. When he looks down at her.

Soarynn Snow.

Her blue-gray eyes shine so brightly as she looks up at him, her face positively beaming with happiness. She looks so radiant today, he should tell her that again, just in case she’s forgotten since they stepped out of the car.

“You look absolutely radiant today my darling, beautiful as always,” he tells her, his smile growing when he sees her blush.

Soarynn has never been one for vanity which is a damn shame because in his opinion, she’s the only one who’s truly entitled to it. There should honestly be a law that everyone has to stare at her beautiful face for at least an hour. Maybe he should make one, he is the President of Panem after all.

“Thank you Coryo, and you already told me that earlier when we were in the car.” She’s so perceptive, so good at remembering every little thing. She’s so perfect. He shakes his head, “I simply can’t tell you enough my darling, you look positively radiant today, you…you have this glow upon you that I can’t look away from.”

She truly does. Coriolanus had been rendered speechless when Soarynn walked down the aisle on the arm of her father. Her face is quite possibly the most beautifully crafted thing he’s ever seen so for her makeup artist to make it even better was a feat unknown to man.

Her skin has a glow unlike any other glow he’s ever seen before. Her cheeks hold a rosiness to them, making her even more adorable when she smiles. Her lashes are so long when she bats them up at him, making her blue-gray eyes pop even more. He’s glad that she didn’t elect to hide her freckles for today, he’s always loved her freckles.

What’s probably the most radiant thing about her is her smile. It’s bewitching. Her rosy pink lips stretch into another big smile at his words of praise and affirmation and she squeezes his shoulder, “You’re a true flatterer, you know that right?”

He sees no issue with that, not when it’s with her.

“There are worse things to be,” he shoots back, “and besides, we only get to do this once so I want to enjoy every second of your beauty today.”

The weeks leading up to their wedding have been nothing short of stressful. Soarynn has handled a brunt of it for the most part but that’s because while she’s been handling florals and cutlery, he’s been handling the entire country.

Which is ironic because Soarynn always ended up going to bed more stressed than he did at the end of the night. According to her, nothing could go wrong. They could not afford to fail.

Coriolanus had every faith in his future wife that their wedding day would go off without a hitch and so far, it has. The ceremony was beautiful and perfectly decorated. All their friends and family were there to witness the union of their two souls.

And Soarynn’s wedding dress is beautiful. The way it clings to her frame and yet flows at the same time truly enhances how graceful and feminine she is with her movements. She had been so excited for him to see her in it and it surpassed every one of his expectations.

Soarynn sighs and rests her head on his shoulder, “Todays felt like a dream,” she murmurs, “a wonderful dream come true. I’m so glad to finally be yours Coryo.”

He feels himself getting a little choked up at her sweet words, words that he returns in tenfold. For so many years he dreamed about what it would be like, what it would feel like to call Soarynn his, truly and forever. He imagined what her wedding ring would look like, what flowers she’d choose for her bouquet, how she’d style her hair.

It’s hard to believe that he’s actually done it, achieved his dreams, his goals.

If living was a competition, Soarynn was surely the prize.

He gently squeezes her waist, inhaling the sweet scent of vanilla that always seems to follow her around, “I hope you know how much I love you Soarynn. You own my heart and soul now darling, and I know you’ll take such good care of it.”

For the longest time he thought he’d walk this life alone. Or at least not happy. Coriolanus could marry anyone, he knew that for certain, but he couldn’t trust anyone. Trust is everything to him.

Then Soarynn came along with her beautiful smile and her contagious laughter. He was a goner the second he laid eyes on her.

She looks back up at him and he tries to imagine what a child of theirs might look like. Blue eyes for certain, and blonde hair too, but would a child of theirs have Soarynn’s freckles? Or his nose? Only one way to find out he supposes.

“I love you too, and thank you for trusting me with your heart Coryo, I know it’s not something to take for granted.”

She’s not wrong. Being President of Panem means being closed off, cold and calculated in everything he does. The only time he ever shows an ounce of kindness is when he’s with her. Soarynn makes the world brighter.

The music finally comes to an end and Coriolanus goes to dip her, keeping one hand firmly wrapped around her waist while the other holds her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. Soarynn giggles at the rather dramatic ending but he knows she loves it.

He can’t help but lean in and steal another kiss from her, from his wife, his darling girl who’s now forever his in life and in death. Soarynn kisses him back with an equal amount of conviction and passion, both of them so happy to finally share the same last name.

What they finally pull away it still feels as if they’re the only two in the room.

The feeling doesn’t last long though. There’s guests to attend to and food to eat but Coriolanus never lets her go through out the entire day. Whether he’s holding her hand, or keeping an arm around her waist, he’s attached to Soarynn. Until death forces them to part where he’s concerned.

When the night finally winds down and the guests are all gone, Soarynn finally lets out that breath he knows she’s been holding in the entire day. “Would it be terrible if we just went to bed?” She asks him while they carefully climb the stairs, not wanting to ruin her dress.

Coriolanus shakes his head and settles for gathering as much of the dress as he possibly can into his hands to make the process a bit easier, “Of course not darling. You must be exhausted after today. Why don’t I draw you a nice bath?”

Soarynn sighs and gives him a grateful look, “Thank you. I…I know there’s traditions on what a couple does on their wedding night but…”

“But it’s not like we haven’t already checked that off the list,” he finishes for her, chuckling at how shy she gets at the mention of sex.

Coriolanus really did try to hold off on having sex with Soarynn, he was so good at stopping things before they got too far. But at one point neither of them found it in themselves to care anymore and Coriolanus wasn’t complaining. Not when Soarynn was an entirely new and gorgeous creature when she was under him fully naked.

What matters now is that she’s fully rested and taken care of. Which is why he draws her a nice warm bath and helps her out of the wedding dress. He washes her hair and peppers her with gentle kisses and sweet words of praise.

He dries her off and dresses her in the warmest pajamas before brushing through her long blonde hair that was pinned up all day. He makes sure the bed is made and the pillows are fluffed before they both slip under the covers, her head immediately finding his chest.

It’s only when Soarynn is finally drifting to sleep that he allows himself to truly soak it all in.

He’s a married man now. Not just a married man but a husband to the sweetest angel who’s ever walked the earth. This isn’t the end for them, merely the beginning. He’ll shower her with more praises, more gifts and tender touches.

This is a new era for them.

For Mr. and Mrs. Snow.

| tumblr oneshot/drabble |

[gingerlee-holds]

okay so this is gonna be something different lmao- my beloved @lionkid gave me an idea when i was visiting her and i wanted to make this for her-! its not a tword fic, but hopefully it'll become a good story if i keep at it- its the first chapter, and please let me know what you think!! i cant wait to build on it more heehee

also im sorry its kinda short lmao

the title for this story is Trains out of Tranton! enjoy <3

Chapter 1: Home

Words: 630 Warnings: Post-Apocalypse setting

It all happened so fast. I suppose it's easier to see the danger of a situation afterward when you have all the facts, and to us, it feels like the world that came before was a house of cards just begging to be toppled over. Frankly, it's a miracle that humankind lasted into the 20th Century. The scholar says the current year is 1996; we must take his word for it.

I am Jack Flynn, born to Samuel and Laurie in a world bereft of hope. The collapse of civilization was their childhood, a time of empty stomachs, and they were robbed of their American Dream. Samuel's tribe crossed paths with Laurie's in the ruins of Seattle during the most brutal blizzard in living memory, and my father chose to leave his people and join hers. Two decades ago, I came into this world one year after he made that choice, and with her final breath, my mother named me and promised me warmth.

Samuel Flynn, a natural leader, led our people from the old home in Seattle where wild dogs roam with foaming mouths and monstrous beasts proclaim themselves men. He brought us south from the bitter cold, and we found our new home in Tranton. Before the collapse, Tranton was a mere trainyard, but it took on a new role among the sick, hungry, and miserable survivors of my tribe. I was still in swaddling cloth then, not nearly old enough to form a memory of life before Tranton nor a perception of where elsewhere is. 

The world I know is far smaller than my father's. Tranton is barely three square miles in area, filled with thousands of people desperate for a place to sleep. The rails rust under torrential rain, springing forth moss and weeds between the tracks. Aspen saplings shot from the soil below in a mad frenzy, and the tallest of them stooped over our homes like giants. The boxcars of the old world make for tremendous homes for a tribe of hungry refugees, and the cars harbored two families each. Most importantly, though, those cars that could not be utilized for storage or transportation around the settlement were heaved onto their sides and became the walls upon which our soldiers stood watch against the horrors beyond.

From what our patrols inform us, every can of food for miles around has been eaten or destroyed by the elements. As such, Tranton must import their food from outside, and every week, a mule hauls a freight car into town, the shriek of ungreased axles announcing its arrival. The farms are among the few places unscathed by the collapse, and in return for the goods we can scavenge from the neighboring cities, they share with us their harvests. Well, that's not entirely true - those of us who can't scavenge become tinkerers, forming scrap metal into tools for survival and weapons against marauders. The turbines we've fashioned turn a fierce squall into a warm meal and a well-lit courtyard for my father to speak to our people from. Our home is at the edge of this courtyard, a diesel locomotive too old to turn its wheels but with a commanding presence over the surrounding cars. The roaring hearth I warmed my hands against was the firebox, and it was my father's responsibility to blow the train's whistle at sunrise each morning.

This whistle, choked with age, was what I awoke to every day for as long as I can recall. This whistle was normalcy, home. The whistle was the assurance that humankind had not yet died. The whistle promised that things were alright now and nothing needed changing. I hated that whistle; more than that, I hated the man who blew it.

[writerswho]

Wednesday, rather, Weems in Wednesday's body enters her-- the principal's quarters without ceremony. 

“There is such a thing as knocking before you enter, did you know that?” Weems, or to be more precise, Wednesday trapped in the principal's body, says from her seat at the kitchen island,

“You're dating Enid!” Weems says, somewhat alarmed. 

“Oh, you found out,” she doesn't seem the least bit bothered by the situation. 

“I can't date a student? Especially not when that student is my daughter!” Weems tries not to scream, she doesn't want to run the risk of the walls hearing it, but keeping calm is becoming increasingly difficult. 

“And you think I want to date my parents?” The disgust is perceptible in the teenager's adult voice. “Do you know how many messages my father has sent me-- sent you today alone?” The principal's phone vibrates tirelessly on the table. “I swear to the devil, if it's another one of his messages, I'm going to kill him and throw his body in a ditch where no one will be able to find it to bring him back.”

“He will keep sending messages until you answer,” Weems walks over to the island and picks up the phone. She types something quick and sends it. The phone vibrates twice more and then silence, Wednesday sighs in relief. “There, he'll leave you alone for a while.”

“Can't I just block him until all this is sorted out?” Wednesday throws the phone into one of the drawers, a deep hatred for the device bubbling up in her chest. 

“And run the risk of Gomez showing up here and making a big deal out of it in front of the entire school?” Weems raises one of Wednesday's eyebrows in defiance. 

“I hate you,” the teenager replies. 

“Me? But I didn't do anything.”

“Of course you did, this is all your fault.”

“You're the one playing with a dangerous book and testing spells left and right!”

“It wasn't a dangerous book, it was a book from my family's personal library.”

“So, an extremely dangerous book.”

“And everything was going very well until you meddled where you shouldn't have.”

“Wednesday, you are my student, my stepdaughter and my daughter-in-law! I couldn't just let you stupidly dangerous things without stopping you!” Weems lets the words flow in the heat of the moment, without noticing what she is saying. 

Wednesday stares at her in a way that doesn't match the blonde's face, she blinks twice and then throws the woman in her body a deadly stare, which makes Weems realize why her staff trembles at the base every time she looks at them like that. “Never repeat any of those words again,” warns Wednesday, “especially not together.”

“I regretted it as soon as the words came out of my mouth,” she admits, pulling herself together. “Wouldn't it be better if we talked to your mother?” Weems changes the subject. 

“No!”

“Wednesday, she is the one who sent you this book, she must know how to resolve our situation.”

“I'm not going to crawl up my mother's skirt every time something goes wrong, I'll fix it, you just have to be patient.” 

“I have patience, Wednesday, the question is whether you can have it. The day has barely started, and you've already made plans to kill your own father. What are you going to do when someone on the faculty says something you don't like or a student irritates you a little too much?”

“What I always do, threaten them with a knife and take pleasure with the fear in their eyes.”

“But you can't do that. I can't do that! If you go around threatening people, it will cost me my job, and I like my job!”

“Why?”

Weems takes a deep breath, this is a discussion for another time. “Wednesday, I just, please don't kill anyone in my body. Don't threaten anyone, don't draw any blood, can you do that?”

“I can try.”

“No, Wednesday, this is serious. You have to do this, do this minimum for me, or you will end up destroying my life and I know you don't like or care that much about me, but I am begging you, please.”

Wednesday is silent for a long time, Weems feels like she's going to scream. “I will not hurt or kill anyone while in possession of your body, however, I promise nothing about wanting revenge on anyone who has angered me once I have returned to my own body,” the girl informs her. 

“Thank you,” Weems smiles lightly, and Wednesday grimaces. 

“Don't do that, don't smile with my face, it's unsettling.”

“Yeah, it really doesn't feel right,” she agrees, the ghost of a smile still there. “I'd better go before Enid wakes up and finds me missing, I don't want to answer any questions. Speaking of Enid...”

“No.”

“What?”

“I'm not going to discuss my girlfriend with you.”

“But I need to know something. Do you hold hands? Do you hug? Do you snooze?”

“Do you really want to know about my relationship with your daughter?”

Weems frowns, “you're right, it's better not to bring it up. But I kind of actually need to know how you act with her in order not to arouse suspicion.”

Wednesday thinks for a few seconds before answering, “keep an acceptable distance, don't engage in unnecessary touching, do whatever she says, but don't give in to absurd things.”

“And what would be absurd things?”

“Wearing matching clothes, for example. The snoods are already bad enough, there is no need for more.”

“You two would look so adorable in matching outfits, oh, imagine if you borrowed one of her sweaters?” Weems has a wicked smile, which matches the teenager's features perfectly. 

“Do this, and I'll tattoo my parents' name on your chest,” it's not a threat, it's a promise.

“All right, I take it back,” she laughs again. Weems' cell phone alarm goes off. “Well, I guess it's time for you to go get ready, principal.”

“And you too, student.” They exchange a last look, determined to do their best, or at least try hard. Weems nods before leaving, she is at the door when Wednesday says, “you are wrong, by the way.”

“About?”

“If I didn't like nor care about you, I wouldn't waste my time with you,” the teenager reveals. The woman just smiles before walking away. 

[javierduffy]

Hellooooo !! You mentioned in the tags of your latest post that you were willing to talk about your process if anyone asked and I am asking!!

It looks so good so I'd love to hear the process and thoughts behind it as someone who hasn't really touched digital painting before :3:3

- Oizys-Mutt

hi oizy :] sory for taking so long to get to this i honestly posted it and then i was like *windows shut down sfx* LOL so i never really felt prepared to answer until neow … not that i super feel like it now since its been so long since o posted the piece ;__; anyway !!! tjank u for asking about it first of all that’s so sweet ure always my biggest supporter </3 thank u ure so darling.

as for the idea behind the piece, i often like to think about how javier and kieran interact when they’re away from prying eyes. of course, i think that they leave camp together as often as they can (as unsuspiciously as possible .. if that’s possible at all) and progressively more and more as the gang falls apart and they know in their hearts that they’re about to lose each other, but because kieran and javier are both desperate lovers, i think they’re always finding romance the moment they think god is so merciful as to look the other way. this is to say, once javier feels as though there are enough leaves, brush, wildlife between he and his family, he rushes to yank kieran’s hand from branwen’s reins to hold. javier loves like a starved man, a one who has formerly been fed grapes and steak from the soft, gentle hands of a house servant, so a one whom knows what it is like to be full— it’s like it’s killing him to live with the grief of lovelessness. and kieran is a man who loves like a starved man who has never had a full meal in his life— he has no idea what it’s like to have a full belly, and he yearns in a way that hollows his chest out as though his heart has never beat once in his life. you put these two together and it’s almost as if lust and gluttony were the same, as if their clothed bodies, separated by the birdth of an entire foot, were forever eloped, connected, full, satisfied. like to merely touch one another is the same as to make love. so when they feel free, finally, away from the shackle of known perception- to be known, to be seen, to be rejected- they CANNOT be apart. it’s like javier can’t breathe if his atoms are not warmed by any of kieran’s that are adjacent. as i said, the moment the sun feels warmer on their skin than curious eyes, they’re intertwined. as simply as possible. every horse ride, trip to town, walk down the riverbank, every breath they take, it’s theirs. plural. so … uhhhmmm … at length, i think they’re always touching :] ! uhm. in not so many words. so it’s often that they will be seen on the road, in the woods, the creaks of their saddles speaking wordless ‘i love you’s as their intertwined hands next to the revolvers in their holsters convince strangers that the tree line opposite the lovers is suddenly quite worth watching instead. sorry. i just wrote a novel. thank you so much for indulging me i have so many feelings about them ;__;

hooonestly i don’t ever have much commentary on the process of the art itself, its moreso my thots behind the horse riding date LOL uhhhmm but since ure curious abt the art i can ramble abt that a bit :] for that piece specifically i really felt like painting for no reason in particular, but ive really felt burnt out on colouring, so i went with the process of .. reverse rendering ? if we want to call it that ? where u render the shadows in monochrome and then use white space as ur lighting and fiddle with the colours after the fact. i’m still not good at this process … at all ! it’s confusing to me ! but i’m more likely to do what i want with the piece, or at least a little more than i would otherwise, because im simply skipping the step that i Don’t want to do. it’s a long story as to why art, and certain aspects of it, is SO hard for me to do, but in short, i’m relearning how to enjoy it as an act after severely burning myself out on it due to setting absurd expectations for myself :] so im just going with my gut ! which … unfortunately does not leave much room for me to explain my process to you ! i’m sorry !!!!

[autisticlancemcclain]

yo Jackie, what's one trope or situation type shit that u wish people would write more fics about. like we all know ur a brown-eyed lance truther, so am I so don't snipe me down babes, but like what else would u wish the fandom would agree on more. like u wish there was more lance and pidge sibling type fics, or more modern fics, or like more dating in secret fics for keith and lance? I'm interested

thank you for asking i have several. full disclosure i am kind of a hater in some of these. did not realize how much i had locked and loaded.

1. doesn’t need to be said but i’m saying it anyway. brown-eyed lance. if i don’t get that tag within a year i am rioting.

2. i LOOOOOOOVE modern aus. they are my bread and butter. i will read a thousand of them. i will WRITE a thousand of them. i love seeing a world built around the essence of these characters, and i love building them more. where would lance be, if he wasn’t in voltron? which of the characters are friends before the whole group finally connects? how do coran and allura fit? where do they work? where do they live? i love it. every decision is a confession.

3. i think everyone needs to have more fun with shiro and allura’s characters. for whatever reason (racism), people like to write them as the villains?? or as boring assholes who are incapable of fun and/or emotions?? anyways it’s the worst. let allura and shiro be stuoid and young and fun 2k23.

4. my favourite thing to write is weird, half analytical backstories/prequels for all the characters, and i love reading them too. what are their families like? what pets if their childhood shaped the way we see them now? who did they learn their habits from? i need to know everything. i have a specific hunk & lance fic i’m thinking about that was never finished, but that changed my entire perception of both of their characters forever. i am so nosy and people in this fandom who create these entire intricate backstories for these characters we already love are so important to me

5. keith’s fanon character in general lowkey pisses me off. i feel like people are OBSESSED with writing him very one dimensional??? like either this kind of mean emo or like tsundere blushing schoolgirl??? anyways it’s weird. keith loves his friends SO much. he cares about everyone everywhere all the time, he’s literally always thinking about what he can do to help people (or he’s being a dorky dumbass lol), he cares so much so often and so deeply. he tries his hardest and puts his all into everything. he loves hugs even though he’s awkward with it. he cries frequently. he wants a mom and at the same time he doesn’t. he loves his brother and his teammates. like??? please please PLEASE i’m begging y’all don’t do keith dirty okay

6. okay you know what’s crazy?? somehow whipped keith and whipped lance ARENT tags. insane to me. like obviously both of them are stupid wicked down bad disgustingly whipped. to me these tags are like. obvious. anyways i wish there were more works under those tags

7. instead of going on a tangent on how each individual character has been done dirty in several ways by fanon, i’m just going to beg everyone in the fandom: please please PLEASE stop making them cruel to each other. okay? they’re young. they’re struggling. they’re constantly under stress literally all the time. they don’t know how to work properly with each other yet. but they LOVE each other, okay?? so much. they would do anything to protect each other. like yes, they mess up, and sometimes they say mean things, and sometimes they just say the WRONG things, and sometimes they’re just awkward with each other!! but they aren’t fucking cruel. not a single member of that team is a cruel person. remember that they want each other to be happy and safe, okay? please. if i read one more fic where the biggest conflict is born by hatred rather than miscommunication or something i am going to lose my mind

8. however there is one specific beef i have with one character’s portrayal in our fandom: HUNK IS NOT A SMOL UWU CINNAMON ROLL. i have no idea why people pretend that he’s this guy who is just constantly smiles and sunshine and who is nice to everyone. let’s not forget that hunk is lowkey a bitch. y’all remember how he acted with nyma and rolo? he is a Judgey Person, yall. he is very dry and quick. remember that he has a little tiny smidge of a superiority complex. do y’all realize how fun it is to have someone who can just constantly cut through anyone’s shit?? who is very kind but is not, necessarily, nice??? it’s AMAZING. peak comedy. also reminder that there is a fine line with making hunk an awesome amazing talented chef and making him, the only fat character, food obsessed. please do not do that to my boy.

9. i love weirdo aus. like aus that are entirely unique and one and their own. aus for movies that have never been au’ed before. brings me so much joy

10. okay this used to be a big thing for me and i don’t write it much anymore (largely bc i don’t feel i’m very qualified too) but genderqueer lance is very important to me. genderqueer all of the team, honestly, i think we should fuck around with all of their shit, not just pidge! i read this one author who would make literally all of the teams trans & nb and it was awesome. nb hunk was something i never knew i needed but something that was so obviously true. i don’t write it too often bc i tend to make everyone very feminine (i love being a girl i love being a girl so so much it blows my mind that not everyone doesn’t want to be a girl all the time it’s AMAZING and thank you trans women for teaching me that), and i know it’s a genuine problem with over-feminization of queer characters in fanon so i don’t do it to often. but there are some amazing trans authors out there who fuck with the team’s gender beautifully and it’s a pleasure to read every single time!!

11. lol and as my username suggests, i’m a big fan of autistic lance!!! i’m also huge on adhd keith, which i know very few other people have in their fics, but i wrote an essay on it a while back and i do very much agree that autistic lance and adhd keith are canon and i would LOVE to see more people write it!!

12. you said it and i one hundred percent agree — secret dating fics my LOVE. i don’t write them much either bc a lot of my fics are very team-focused but they’re so so fun to read anyway honestly

13. EDIT BECAUSE I FORGOT TO ADD. i love writing lance’s full name as Leandro Agustín Nuñez Carmen Esposita-McClain — or, shortened, Lance McClain

i have so many things honestly. so many tags that are everything to me and also thank you so SO much for the ask i love having a reason to ramble

[hologramcowboy]

This was JA in the beginning of this year's JIB and then last weekend:

You know how HIGHLY critical I am of him, how much I dislike many of his actions and opinions since SPN ended, and mostly how much he hurt Jared and tried to smear his reputation during his TW's promo tour with small comments that could have been taken to a bigger scale than they were - thank God that dint happen.

But on a human level, why is nobody helping this man? Are only you and me seeing how unhappy he is? Like if fans can see, why his family and friends cannot? Or if they do, why don't they interfere? It goes beyond him "getting a new face" every 6 months. Most of his acting has become soulless, the passion he seemed to have for music is gone as well. His alcohol intake - to me - works like a clutch / a tool he overuses to make things bearable. The way he has been marketing himself is so insincere, artificial and plastic. Almost like he thinks all he has to offer now is his looks.

I don't want to be alarmist, cause , then again, I am a stranger to him and my perceptions could be entirely wrong, but Its just that my empathetic side can't help to pick up on all of this and be sad for him.

This is not an ask per se, just me talking to somebody who I know cares about him beyond his physical appearance. You don't need to answer publicly or even in private if it gets to heavy for you cause I know you're a sensitive person (totally using sensitive in a good, human, healthy way here).

Also, I noticed you're been here less, I hope everything is okay with you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

I wonder the same. I see so many posts of people drooling over pictures where Jensen looks soulless, disconnected and clearly suffering. Can they really not get over his looks just once to see the human behind them? He is spiraling more and more and not having a job seems to be detrimental to his well being. The person I judge the most in this is Danneel, she's just like those obsessed fangirls who objectify him, she seems to be highly out of touch with his emotional make-up.

It also seems Jensen has somewhat alienated his family in favor of Elta's and that worries me deeply. I hope a friend of family member will interveve since it's clear Danneel could care less. Jensen is a father so I hope he finds his balance soon because his addictions are bound to affect his relationships.

@unabashedlyinlove sending love right back! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[jennycalendar]

wait so. I HAVE MORE QUESTIONS HI

ALSO: if at any point you don't want to answer any more questions just answer my asks privately and i'll stop <3

OK SO QUESTIONS ABOUT THE GIRLIES

wait so. scoobies/bakery girlies we end up w/: Marigold/Willow, Evie/Spike/Dru (maybe), Norie/Anya. this is hilarious i love this. they are dating each other and it's going awesome <3 (false). NOW WHAT WOULD THE SCOOBIES THINK OF THE BAKERY GIRLIES. WHO WOULD THEY LIKE

i am obsessed with the brie/marigold issues. they are very fun. it is awesome. faith/evie brie/marigold marigold/willow enemies of all time. other question: would brie get along w/roslin? i kinda feel like she would

i. LOVE SOPHIE. and EVIE. my BESTIES WHO ARE SAD. also. ELODIE. (i love them all but somehting about SOPHIE EVIE ELODIE tickles my brain specifically :3). can we get some elodie information. anything about her you want to tell us.

LIONEL ALSO I FORGOT ABOUT HIM. would he get along with spike.

FANGED FOUR TIME!!! whom among bakery girlies do the fanged four hang out w

and how do the bakery girlies like the fanged four?

wait evie/spike/dru feels like it'd have some issues related to the mind control thing/seeing red? no?

anywyas. I have more questions but have to go I will SEND THEM TO YOU LATER IF YOU ARE OKAY WITH THAT OKAY THANKS

<3

HI FEEL FREE TO KEEP SENDING QUESTIONS FOREVER !!!

1. off the top of my head i would say that giles and thea were tight in college (she was surprisingly square but they ran in the same circles, idk). xander might have a thing for marigold lowkey because she's verbose and opinionated and this would Not Go Well For Him, or for willow, who would of course be fiercely jealous at even the concept of marigold paying attention to someone else (idek whats going on there man). evie and cordelia would strangely get along really really well and a lot of that has to do with mutual authenticity. buffy and roslin go get manicures together or smth

2. brie would absolutely get along with the entire bakery family really well bc she and marigold are the exact same kind of girl but the problem with this is that marigold's clinical need to be the most specialest girl in the room would kick in and have her out for blood. so yes brie would get along with roslin. for brie's safety she should not get along with roslin

3. elodie .... hm! she's fine and normal. definitely super well adjusted. she's getting such a good grade in trauma recovery and she wasn't even that traumatized anyway because nothing bad has ever happened TO her it just happened NEAR her. it's whatever. do not ask her about it

4. spike would kill lionel dead in seconds either with a well placed observation about every psychological issue that man has or just like. literally killing him. however thinking about this made me realize that i do actually believe lion and xander making out would genuinely fix them both but i do not fucking know how that could POSSIBLY happen

5/6. thea's proposed marriage to darla 17 times and darla is genuinely considering it mostly just to flip off her ex husband who's boring now. norie is obsessed with angel in the same kinda comphet crush way as she is obsessed with that serial killer she knows & angel is EXTREMELY uncomfortable with this. marigold and spike have something genuinely insane happening i think because spike is incredibly perceptive and marigold lies professionally about her feelings all the time, so she hates him on sight and he's like lol whatever i've got your number (which makes her hate him more). ros has an endless amount of patience for drusilla bc she's got a degree in Moderately Creepy Little Sister Who's Actually Soft At Heart so she WILL take tea and cakes w miss edith, for sure. sofie is not allowed near the vampires but keeps on trying to socialize w drusilla who is definitely interested in killing her lowkey (which is giving marigold a constant heart attack).

7. i do believe that the entire seeing red situation would shatter evie more than she's already been shattered and my girl does not need that psychologically which is why she is not IN the buffyverse!!! her vampires treat her right. she's the princess (the girls that get it get it)

[thekats]

Nothing to bring you back down just as you're clawing your way out of a hole like a good old-fashioned realisation that you still have a ways to go to deconstruct oppressive systems that were planted in your brain at the ripe age of "no thoughts yet".

(Very long post on internalised fatphobia below)

I've been working hard to deconstruct internalised fatphobia (among other things). I've been trying every which way to love and find the beauty in my own shape ('average' weight, curvy build). I've been gently inserting and steering conversation to the best of my abilities towards body positivity. I've been reprimanding friends and family for repeating tropes and notions. And strike me with lightning right now if I don't love bigger bodies. On other people.

And I've been fighting that last tidbit so hard for so long. I like to think that if I were, truly, fat, I'd embrace it, but that I'm so insecure right now bc I'm this weird in-between where, if I show off my body, people will think I think I'm thin enough to fit the beauty standard (I am not). Me wearing a crop top does not feel like a statement so much as it feels like I'm petulantly trying to make people see that "I AM thin!!!!!" My belly isn't flat. My belly isn't toned. I'm so used to sucking it in that I've developed this weird issue where I frequently fully forget to breathe.

I am a binge eater. I've been fighting that for a very long time as well. I also have (now hopefully permanently dormant) hyperthyroidism and currently no-money-itis. I default to around 80kg give or take at a whopping 1,78m height. I'm the average's average, it seems like. And I honestly can't tell anymore if my issues with my body fat are because society and bullying have destroyed my perception of myself so much that I'm seeing things in the mirror, or if I just genuinely hate myself and the social consequences of fatness so much that I have to obsessively criticise every lump and bump on my bones. Or maybe I'm just that obsessed with clinging to every bit of control I think I have left in my life? I am not fat; I know that. I do not experience the daily struggles of fat people; I know that. Trust me, my mum is fat and has been my entire life. I know.

But when a work colleague asked me today if I'd lost weight, I was instantly sent into a shutdown, at work (luckily my shift today is working solo, but I still have to interact with people), because I had too many reactions all at once. None of them was pride.

You see, I've been battling with myself for weeks now if I can wear a crop top to my local pride event this year. I've worn a crop top for the first time in probably a decade only a few weeks ago and I felt great, sexy, comfortable, until I sat down with my very thin friend at an ice cream parlour. It had been my idea and my treat bc I hadn't "spoiled" myself to ice cream in a looong time when it is one of my favourite foods. The ice cream was good, the weather was warm, and there were people who were barely paying us attention but simultaneously seemed to be staring me into becoming a black hole. And I know paranoia is another one of my issues, but you can't deny the fact that people love to stare especially at those they consider in any way "unsightly". I felt like they must have considered me unsightly. Particularly when my friend is all thin and flat and narrow, even when sitting down, she's conventionally attractive and gets hit on. I get hit on, too, but I don't see that in those moments. I remarked proudly that day "I am wearing a crop top!" and she answered "I am wearing a crop top, too." It made me angry because, I thought, "Yes, but your thinness is not policed like my potentially perceived thickness." Neither her nor I have any actual say in our weights. She can't gain, I can neither gain nor lose. That's okay. It really really is. For other people.

I've seen so many beautiful fat queers at pride events over the years. I am not them. I cannot be them because I am not fat. So I still don't know if I can wear a crop top to my local pride event this year because it won't look like a statement. It will look like a desperate plea to be considered thin.

Another big thing my mind cycled through so very instinctual was "if my colleague noticed me losing weight and I have such issues with how 'big' I look now, then how big must I have been the last time she saw me? And I didn't even realise? How big am I now without realising it?!" Mind you, I've lost this incredibly huge amount of 4kg in however-many months /s. Yes, I can do my belt tighter by one, but scrunches up the waist of my trousers and it's uncomfortable/overstimulating, making me suck in my belly even more than I'm already trying not to do. But there's no change for my colleague to see, really. There shouldn't be.

The last big thing that went through my mind at the question was a mix of anger and frustration. Anger because why? Why would you comment on my weight? Why is that a thing you do? Just why? And frustration because it was 7am, I was already entering the shutdown and so had 0 energy to get into my spiel about why she shouldn't be asking that, why she shouldn't comment on that and why she is playing into the whole systematic- I just said "I don't know, maybe, I don't care."

"I don't care."

For two hours now and for the rest of the day at least, I have felt and will continue to feel shame. Not because I lied. I'm a high-ranking autistic who desperately wants to be an actor. I lie all the time. Being me is the biggest, most intricately detailed role I will play in my entire life. No, I am ashamed because

clearly

I do care. So much.

I've done all this work for years and I still fall short of my own damn self.

But, without wanting to turn this into a bs forced-positivity ✨keep going and everything will be alright✨ kind of inspo-post, I won't back down because of this. I feel deflated, disappointed, deterred. But not defeated.

Setbacks are normal.

Society is a sneaky snake and the roots of those seeds it plants run deep. You probably don't need a white person to tell you this (or maybe you do, but that's another, very frustrating topic), but you won't dismantle all this shit you want to fight within yourself in a year. Not when it's been growing inside you your whole life. And you will hit walls. In others. In society. In yourself. If nothing else can motivate you to stick with it, let pettiness do that job for you. Society right now is still fucked. It will stay fucked for both our lifetimes. Show it the middle finger. Be part of the change for generations to come.

Just because we have to suffer now, doesn't mean everyone has to suffer in generations to come.

This goes for all intersectional matters ever.

[amberarmedheart]

The Color Of Makeup

It had always been difficult for me to find the proper color of foundation that goes with my skin color. Whenever I used to go to the stores, back in the early 2000s when i started high school and I had learned the hard way how cruel the world can be, they never ever had my shade. One store after another, one counter after another, and I simply couldn't find them... in the usual markets, that is.

If I wanted more affordable, regular brands, they never carried my shade. But if I really, really wanted to match it, I had to go to an expensive department store to actually get the exact shade that didn't make me look ashy or weird.

And from the very first moment, I was fine with it. Why? Well, it is quite simple: I am pale as an uncooked flour tortillas and I am a Mexican living in Mexico.

It was obvious to me that the usual supermarkets didn't carry my shade, the percentage of the population that has my exact skin color is quite small, so of course it would be difficult for me to find it. My grandparents, after all, were a wild mix: Mexican, Spanish, Chinese, and French. Why the hell did the genetic lottery decide I was to be born with a white pale butt, I will never know. Yes, my dad was white, but my mother has brown skin, and so did two of my grandparents, and then there was my grandmother with a French last name and green eyes and platinum blonde hair.

What bothered me since I was a kid was the fact that I looked around and most people around me had brown skin and yet, whenever I looked at a magazine, an ad, a movie or a tv show, everyone there was white, nine times out of ten. It bothered me whenever some of my aunts would start describing someone as "oh she is so pretty, you know, she is white and blonde and..." and how some of my uncles would say "of course you wouldn't want your daughter to date a black man"... and every single time, those aunts and uncles with the most racist views ended up having dark skin themselves.

I don't know how, in the middle of such a harmful environment, both of my parents managed to have an entirely different perception of the world, but I am grateful for it. And yet, I know that a lot of the hate and anger that my extended family expressed towards other people due to the color of their skin had a lot to do with the messages that the media taught them since they were children. How difficult it must be for a child to grow loving the way they look when the tv and movies always say that dark skinned people are the bad ones and even the church will portrait angels as blonde.

And yet, the idea that "the others" are "scary, different, dangerous" is always perpetuated by major pieces of media: the most recent one, at least in my sphere of interests, is Genshin Impact, which recently released a teaser trailer for a new region called Natlan. This region has been mentioned as one that draws inspiration from Latin America and Africa... and the darkest skinned character in it looks like me after ten minutes under the desert sun.

"It is a fantasy game, why should it be accurate?" some person who knows exactly why asks in bad faith in social media, to which you and I both know that if there is a damned playable dog boy, they can add at least three more drops of brown to their palette.

"Why can't you empathize with characters that don't have the same skin color as you?" asks someone else with an ai generated profile picture and a cross and a flag emojis following their nickname, to which I say: why can't you? 99% of the characters portrayed in the media you consume are the exact same ethnicity as you, and every single time someone slightly different appears, you will scream "DEI! Woke! They are ruining everything!" The rest of the world has had to swallow every single "white savior" piece of media up to this day, why can't you stop spitting for once, there's half a child there you know, I thought you were against abortions.

"It is only being inspired!" someone else screams, red faced, into the void, to which I say that if you are taking name and surname from a deity to represent said deity and the color motifs and tattoos and even reference their powers but the only thing you don't take from them is their skin color, that's colorism.

Next thing I know, Hoyoverse will try to copyright the Mayans, you know, like Disney tried to copyright Dia De Muertos back before it released Coco.

I am old and exhausted about life as it is, I am tired of the constant cycle of fear that politicians and multinational companies use everywhere to divide the people, draw targets on each others' backs and then point and scream "they are the reason you are suffering, not me, never me!". I am tired of people swallowing it up because it is way easier to punch someone "different" to a pulp than recognize that both of us have the same enemy and the same source of suffering and that what we should do to fix this mess requires of a lot more effort than picking one color in a ballot every four years.

[humiliationsheets]

who is your favorite bmc character and why? (please infodump at least several paragraphs tyvm /nf)

contrary to my username (which i only keep as a relic of early 2020 when times were easier and also because my usual one was snatched in 2018), i am a huge huge huge jeremy heere kin. like absolutely huge. he is me and i am him and i had a years-long delusion in which i genuinely believed i was him so he is obviously very special to me 😭 i even named myself after him so!! big jeremy fan over h(e)ere lmao!!

how i see him is based on troy iwata’s portrayal simply because he’s my favorite jeremy and i think he plays the character absolutely perfectly, but he is also combined with wrol and wcon in a lot of aspects because i adore their portrayals as well :-) so this post is gonna be based off my headcanons and development of jeremy over the course of four (nearly five) years, if you’re invested in 1000% concrete canon perception of characters and you hate when characters aren’t 1000% accurate to the source material (i try my best to keep him canon! just some people may think he’s not accurate enough which is fine /gen) then… please scroll away and don’t criticize me because he’s the loml LMAO

this is a big post so. continued under the cut !!

so first off, jeremy is just such an interesting character. he’s a pessimistic hopeless romantic, he’s sarcastic, he’s naïve and trusts so easily (see how he immediately trusts the squip, for example, as well as believing rich’s offer in the bathroom and giving him the benefit of the doubt), he’s gross and sometimes mean (unless if he’s talking to a girl, in which he’s the softest person alive), he’s funny, and he’s such a teenage boy and i just. wanna kiss him on his stupid freckled face. what i like about him is that he’s so fun. he can be whatever you want him to be and nearly every time, it makes total sense.

what i also love is just how relatable he is. it is also so insanely important to me to have an autistic coded character like jeremy represented in media. he acts just like me, an autistic person, from his stims to his mannerisms and all, and i think that’s why i was so set on believing we were the same person for SO LONG. (not to mention troy!jeremy is just. so pissed at the world from the get-go, just like me 😭, as opposed to wrol!jeremy’s sadness slowly growing into bitterness and spite. angry transmasc representation + bpd jeremy foreverrr /hj)

to continue, he’s an example of how good people can do bad things and still learn from their mistakes. in my opinion, jeremy is not at all a bad person for what he did. yes, he was a jerk, and yes, he was selfish, but LET THE BOY BE SELFISH. he’s earned it!!! he’s just a seventeen year old boy and he’s Really Going Through It. i mean, his dad is practically neglecting him, his mom has entirely abandoned his family, he gets bullied at school constantly and goes unnoticed by everyone he’s interested in, and his best and only friend is dismissive of his problems and feelings. i’m writing a post-squip fic currently (which i am SO excited to share), and some jeremy dialogue i wrote down is the following: “I wanted it all to stop so badly, I would’ve done anything. So I did anything.” he would’ve done whatever it takes to have a better life y’all. to stop being so angry and miserable all the time and to stop hating himself. the squip was his only way out and i absolutely respect him for deciding to take it. i understand hating being alive so much that all one can do is search for a way out of it. i do not, however, agree with him abandoning michael and turning into a huge jerk that nearly took over the world, but he was manipulated into believing everything he did was the right choice. i can’t stay mad at him because it wasn’t his fault. nobody blames rich for what he did squipped, so why is it fair to blame jeremy? they were both manipulated into the terrible things they did, and if some people continue to blame jeremy… oh sweetie i hope someone enlightens you soon.

IN CONCLUSION. jeremy is just a super complex and interesting protagonist who so many can relate to. i love how he can be whatever you want him to be and i love his personality, his flaws and tics and all. i don’t think he’s a terrible person like so many do, he’s just a kid who made mistakes and was manipulated and misguided. he’s absolutely just like me fr and i’m just <33 he has my heart forever and ever. i could go on for years and years about him (and i have) but i’m sparing your time. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS SHITSHOW I LOVE YOU

[acacia-may]

Hiya Acacia! For the salty ask game; may I ask for 1, 4, and 11 please 🥰? It can be for any fandom, but if you want a specific one it can be Black Clover!

Alright Lyra! Let's get salty about Black Clover ^^

Necessary disclaimer above the cut: These are just my own personal opinions based on my personal tastes, perceptions, and feelings regarding the series, stories, and characters and their relationships. I genuinely have the utmost respect and absolutely no ill will towards anyone who has a different opinion than me. In fact, I have always said that one of the greatest things about fandom is that we can all experience and perceive these amazing stories and characters in very different ways but still love them. Even some of my dearest fandom friends enjoy different pairings than me or see our shared favorite characters in wildly different ways than I do. I personally find it very rewarding to have respectful conversations about our differences of opinion, and I hope that my opinions will also be respected. Also, I don't vibe with just mindless bashing things, so even though this is about to get very salty and a little snarky, I'll try to keep it respectful and all in good fun. I am not tagging anything and am hiding my thoughts under the cut so you all don't have to be subjected to my hot takes and "Salty Acacia," if you don't want.

OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?

Yami paired with any of his Black Bull subordinates!! I mean I guess I get it if you don't see him as a parental figure to them, but in my mind, this whole group has Daddy Issues™️ and collectively adopted this man as their father-figure. The idea of adding romance in there just gives me the ick. Especially with Finral...It's just such a personal squick for me that I will just never understand it. Sorry not sorry.

Also, Langris x Mimosa. I do not vibe with that. It's not as visceral as the Yami x a Black Bull ships, but it's just not my cup of tea at all and I genuinely can't imagine them (as I personally perceive them) ever having a romantic interest in each other since she's kind of like a little sister to him in my mind. I know people, including friends, who ship this pairing and I respect that. I've actually read fics about them trying to understand it and the appeal, but ultimately I'm just never going to get this one personally. It's just not for me.

4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?

YamiFin. See above. I know a lot of people ship it, including people I know and consider my friends, and I know it is because they view their relationship in a wildly different way than me and do not imagine those paternal, familial vibes between them that I do. Like I said in the disclaimer, I respect their differences of interpretation and opinions, so again nothing against them. For me, however, I personally do not vibe with that ship on every possible level. Again, in my mind, Yami is just such father-figure to him that this is just viscerally a NoTP for me.

Vanessa x Yami is the same way but less intense(?) I guess because she has shown a canonical romantic interest in him at least back when he was the only man she had ever seen... (which doesn't seem healthy, so that's a really big nope for me. Also again with the father-figure vibes!!)

I guess Mimosa x Langris is a NoTP too, but it doesn't give me as much of the personal ick as the Yami ones and I don't think it's that popular, so it feels a little unfair to list them here even if I really, really don't vibe with that one. Still, it's a no for me!

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

I'm not entirely sure who is unpopular in the fandom at large because I feel like we kind of have our chill, small corner of the BC fandom here and that's where I hang out. I guess I would say Langris because I think he is a pretty dislikable character and even though I feel like most people tolerate him a little more after the Spade Arc, he isn't the most popular when he's really one of my personal favorite characters in the series. I feel like he has a lot of depth to him, and he interests me. I don't excuse his bad behavior or the way he treated his brother, but I think I can understand the why behind his behavior and appreciate that he has been having a good arc. He isn't as terrible of a person as I thought he was in the beginning. Even I used to detest him, but now he's a favorite.

I'm not sure who else is unpopular? Um...I feel like Mimosa gets a lot of undeserved hatred sometimes because of the whole shipping war (which I also don't understand), and that irks me because I think she's actually a pretty cool character and it's not fair that she gets written off and/or disliked for shipping discourse outside of her control. If y'all are so obsessed with her gettting in a relationship with someone who isn't Asta just ship her with Yuno or something I guess??? It's really not that hard! I like her friendship with Klaus and Yuno and her cousin relationship with Noelle a lot. She's also had a good arc! (Sorry that's one wasn't very salty...😅)

[jaggedwolf]

pll rewatch 1x19

you get a date, and you get a date, and everybody gets a date, oh, and spencer has a bad time (but also a date).

we start with the girls at the police station with their parents. none of the girls mentioned spencer's thing with ian in their interviews, and the parents mostly seem to believe the girls have been pranked

garrett reynolds is introduced as a former neighbour of emily, and I have no memory whether him being a neighbour is important.

like, important neighbours: emily-toby, spencer-alison. vaguely implied neighbours but it doesn't really matter: hanna-aria.

Aria: Whoever said the truth will set you free never met A. Emily: Jesus. The girls: -give Emily confused looks- Emily: It's from the Bible; Jesus said it.

Is Emily religious? The Fields do seem the most likely family of the Liars to go to church, though even then my take is that Pam tried the local churches when they first moved to Rosewood, occasionally goes/volunteers to one of them, but doesn't really gel with any of them.

Paige is such a bad liar, her saying she "had to visit her aunt. She's old." has made me doubt that she even has an aunt. She has apparently been swimming nights to avoid seeing Emily - this suggests that normally they do their outside-of-practice swims at the same time at school

Toby is so scared of Jenna that he will go spend money on a motel room just to get away from her being mad at him, and then starts suspecting she's at the motel too. ...I can't really make fun of him for this, given his entire history with Jenna

Ezra bugging Aria with a dozen questions on Jenna really annoyed me. If you are going to date your student, can you at least consider not getting information about your other students out of her? No?

Caleb is so :D :D :D now that he's dating Hanna that he forgets to put down the toilet seat in the house, leading to Ashley finding him and kicking him out. Caleb slinks off wordlessly while Hanna makes references to Ashley's own difficult youth.

Paige leaves Emily a note, which my friends initially think is an A-note, unlike me and my unnecessarily thorough memory of all Paige-related scenes. She 100% could have texted Emily, they have each other's numbers, but I enjoy that her instinct is note in locker. Huh, hold that thought for later.

The karaoke bar is called "Hungry Owl Tavern". Good name.

I like their little conversation here and that Emily for no reason offers that she was in love with Alison. I mean, once your unreciprocated crush got outed by a dickbag cop to your friends, just start telling it to your dates I guess.

Paige's response to this fun fact is "She seemed like a very dynamic person" which is an incredibly diplomatic way to describe Alison Dilaurentis. I must give her credit for this, she is not someone who is naturally tactful.

Paige is much more relaxed here, and the one upside of this season's terrible haircut is that we get to see it become more casual as she does too. Karaoke ensues after Paige goads Emily into it.

Hanna gets laaaaid after Caleb learns she went to fat camp and Hanna learns his mom walked out on him. Good for her, she does deserve to be the first liar to get laid given how much she wanted it at the beginning of this season

Enjoyed Hanna being a whiz at camp set-up and city boy Caleb being spooked at every sound in the woods.

Spencer is very cute when hopped up on caffeine talking about spy apps on her phone, and when miffed at losing Scrabble

Toby's abs are so defined they are starkly visible in the night-time, I'm scared. This is why Spencer loses her mind at seeing him in the bathroom.

Emily and Aria hang out in Emily's room not not talking about their dates, a scene I'd forgotten about. I am slightly tempted to track scene counts of the liar subsets to see how big the actual imbalance is vs fandom's perception of it.

Anyway, I do have a soft spot for Emily and Aria hanging out, they have a much quieter energy to their scenes.

Picnic time! I forgot that the karaoke and the picnic were in the same episode, let alone on sequential days.

Emily is very good in her conversation with Paige here - Paige's panic makes sense here, given everything we know about her dad, and it is a real thing that if you are known to be gay it puts people of the same gender who are close to you under suspicion, even for innocent interactions

And Emily makes an excellent choice for herself here going nah, I feel good about who I am now, I remember when I didn't and the act of pretending or hiding would make me feel bad again.

I think S1!Emily doesn't get enough credit, honestly, even at the start she's got more of a backbone than the freshman year version of her does

My unasked for opinions on how much the liars change between Alison's disappearance and the start of canon: Emily looks the same but is different personality-wise, Aria looks different but is the same personality-wise, Hanna has changed in both regards, and Spencer Hastings Will Never Change She Is Eternal.

Also eternal is Spencer's parents being dickbags, because their response to finding out their daughter is a person of interest and that their grown son-in-law macked on their 14/15-year old daughter is to go "Spencer!! How dare you not tell us!!!!" instead of "Ian! Get the fuck off our property before I sock you in the jaw!"

Ashley invites Caleb to stay permanently and asks him to call her Ashley instead of Mrs Marin - I'm not sure we ever see him do so. Caleb goes off to make a mysterious call where he says he's not helping anymore...

Best A message: A leaving a bag of ice with the message YOU'RE GETTING COLDER. Literally just knew they were getting obsessed with 214 and decided to drive Spencer nuts about it. Classic.

[saintmeghanmarkle]

What would you say to Harry? by u/Economy-Alfalfa-2241

What would you say to Harry? So, in a hypothetical world where we all have an opinion, what would you say to Dimbo if you could? Or Meghan? Or the kids?I'm going to do my annual nice because I'm running out of year soooo...Don't get me wrong, I *despise* his behaviour. He can't even begin to comprehend the wider ramifications, we should have reeled him in and chloroformed him if necessary, don't even get me started on Ghastlywife etc etc. But ahead of all that - which I would shout a lot, repeatedly, later. So just for now and probably for ever, "*you can always go home.*Yes, it will be embarrassing. Yes, you will have to eat Humble Pie with a heavy slosh of Mortified Custard and yes, it's all a bit bigger than family. But when you've thunked your thunkings, taken your accountabilities and sorried your sorries, a heartfelt regret voiced to one gets you absolution from the whole. We don't want to dislike you, we really don't. It's so much easier when we're not up the snotter with the RF; most of us like to hold you in a kind of benevolent ignorance and you must admit, it's a good deal. And yes, you have a LOT to rebuild but again, goodwill really does grease the bearings.Harry. Ask Siri to help with the big words, but they don't really matter. The words that matter are:You can always come home.​And that goes for anyone - if you understand this, you'll understand why. "Spare" should never have been published because its a voyeuristic nosy around in someone else's mind that might've slipped its gimbals . That's nothing to do with Americans being more open or whatever bollox he's been led to believe cos I don't for one minute think any one of you would think it appropriate outside your closest friends ears or those of your therapist. How Harry went from conservative to vomiting up every second of every injustice for the entire world is...worrying (any psych people in here?)But I think Scobie's new shlockfest slammed the door for him. Or he may think it has. Some - well, most - of his slights were over such minutiae that I think they're maybe misperceptions rather than memories, and the obvious culprit is depression. He really does seem to have this bleak outlook that the distorted lens of depression casts across everything; every memory, every occasion, every event. But Scobie's book really removes any of what little nuance that remained after the rest of the whining and it draws a line much harder than any Harry has wanted to so far. It just seems like an aggressive move whereas Harry really relies on the passive-aggressive, he receives offences that haven't been sent. But if you get to the point where you can't see a way forward you always have to know there's a way back. I think I might be at the point of worrying about whether he knows that.​I dunno. Praps I've been boiled too long and am going soft, but it's hard enough to do the accountability thing for any reason. It's hard to realise your perceptions were skewed, your memory the faulty one. So if it's hard when it's just a family who want to forgive and don't really see much to forgive anyway.....imagine what it's like thinking a whole country is against you. Yeeesh.On the other hand, it'll be that country paying so you can concentrate on screwing your head on straight with no teensy little worries like the mortgage or which box you left the kids in (dammit! I was determined to be snark-free. Huh!) so there's that. Swings n roundabouts. post link: https://ift.tt/y7Ogbs5 author: Economy-Alfalfa-2241 submitted: December 11, 2023 at 08:42PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit