#and the lack of choice is why i dress like my mom. which again not complaining im just saying. i could look a little better than that if i | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ruhrohimrorny · 2 years ago

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Investment

Jotaro x reader

Words: 1938

Authors Note: Ok so I posted this on my Ao3, but then I decided I wanted to post it on my Tumblr too, so here’s me breaking my inactivity to do this. I initially had Rohan in mind for this one, but then I was going through a Jotaro phase so it became a Jotaro fic instead. Enjoy.

You both walked back from dinner to your apartment. At this point, the sky was devoid of most light, save for the growing ambient glow of the moon. Walking alongside him, his arms swung back and forth, and his eyes searched your face.

“Are you mad at me?”

You fought to not roll your eyes.

“No, it’s fine.”

“My mom always told me that meant the person was actually angry”

“Well did your mommy forget to tell you you should compliment your girlfriend more?”

“What do you mean?”

You stopped walking and looked at him, his eyes conveying a genuine lack of understanding.

“I mean, I spent four hours getting ready, and all I got was a ‘you look pretty’ and then no other acknowledgements of how I looked. You didn’t check me out, you didn’t seem to have refrain yourself from touching me, and not once were you so overwhelmed by my beauty that you had to interrupt me to tell how stunning I am.”

He cocked an eyebrow at you.

“You read too much romance.”

“I know, and I also know it’s kind of silly of me to be this upset. But I put so much effort in, pushed myself so far out of my comfort zone, and felt so confident in myself, so to just get a three word compliment and nothing more kind of hurts.”

“Ya, but why would I have to keep telling you how good you look? You know I think you’re beautiful; I’m dating you.”

“I know you do, but it’s nice to hear it. Look, you probably spent, what, an hour getting ready? Maybe two? But I think I spent the whole night gushing over how cute you looked. Because even though I know you know that I think you’re handsome, I wanted to make sure you knew that I saw the effort you put in to looking nice tonight, which I would like too. To have my efforts feel seen.”

“Well, it’s not like I asked you to spend four hours getting ready. You made that choice on your own.”

You dragged your nails over your face, feeling exasperated at how unrelenting your boyfriend was.

“Look, whatever. I don’t feel like standing here and arguing. Let’s just go.”

You started walking again, your heels returning their attack on the blisters you had developed from a week of practicing walking in them.

“I don’t see how I’m in the wrong, though.”

That was enough to cause you to stall and grind your teeth.

“Jotaro, it’s not about being ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. I already admitted this was a ridiculous thing for me to be upset about, so I can tell you right now I don’t even think I’m ‘right’. But you asked if I was upset, so I told you. I’m just hurt. I mean, how hard would it be for you to say ‘I’m sorry’ and vow to compliment me more than once next time I get dressed up? Apparently too fucking hard, because then you would be ‘wrong’.”

“Ok, fine then. I’m sorry.”

You turned around and started walking, hoping that he wouldn’t see that your eyes were starting to water.

“I don’t want an apology if you have to force it. I’m going home. You should too.”

You hated this. You both were, for the most part, go-with-the-flow people. Hardly ever did you both get worked up, and usually never over such trivial things. So you felt slightly ridiculous while walking away, damn near crying over your boyfriend’s characteristic lack of verbal affection. What did you expect? He was like this when you met him, why would you think he would change.

“I don’t want you to do that. I’m not comfortable with you just walking home alone after dark. We don’t have to talk, just let me walk you home.”

“Fine.”

You continued walking, and heard the constant fall of his feet behind you. He never made any effort to walk beside you. You weren’t sure if that was because he needed space, or if that was his attempt at giving you some.

“You know, walking a few feet behind me makes you look exactly like the kind of creep you were worrying about me encountering.”

He pulled out his creepy voice, a cross between Gollum and a fedora wearing Reddit mod.

“I just think you’re so pretty, I wanted to walk behind you in the hopes of catching a whiff of your delectable pheromones. Mmmm, I’m catching some hints of bergamot, and, mmm, maybe some violet.”

He sniffed deeply and you looked back to see him theatrically scooping the air towards his face. His eyes were closed and his lips pursed.

“Is that a little bit of fart I’m smelling? Did you toot, darling? You know that I love such a sudden and immodest noise.”

You tried to keep the laugh in your chest, let it die there and potentially kill you rather than risk letting him know he made you crack. But you couldn’t hold it in, not when he quoted James Joyce’s greatest work.

“Stop, you sound like a fucking perv.”

But you were laughing and so was he. Until an “ow” escaped your lips and you had to bend down to rub the festering blister, as though that would somehow help it. You heard his footsteps continue until his deep blue shoes came up right next to your shiny black ones.

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh, these heels are giving me blisters, and my boyfriend didn’t offer me any salve in the form of compliments to ease the pain and make it worthwhile.”

“Maybe I should stop asking that question.”

Right as you were about to crane your neck to glare at him, he bent over to be at eye level with you.

“I’m sorry. And I know you’re still mad at me, but let me carry you home. We don’t have to talk, and you don’t even have to acknowledge me. You can pretend that you’re being carried home by the wind, or a super hot ghost. But please let me help you.”

“Oh, so you’re gonna try to white knight yourself out of this one?”

You rolled your eyes, but wrapped your arms around his neck and let his hand come under your knees, as this was the least he could do for you was this. He stood up like he was carrying a plushie and carried you without complaint. It was silent for a few minutes, until you came under the warm light of a street lamp, where he decided to stop and peer down at you. You looked back at him, waiting for him to explain why the breeze that was carrying you home died out all of the sudden. But he just stood there with a goofy smile on his face, his body twisting back and forth, almost like he was rocking a baby.

“What are you doing?”

“Your face looks really pretty in this lighting.”

“But not in the lighting of the restaurant, right?”

“Nope. Those lights made you look hideous. Now you look alright.”

“Glad the feeling was mutual. I was holding back gags the whole time we were there, because looking at your face just proved to be too much.”

“Ohhh, I thought that was disgust for the food. Well, thank you for the clarification.”

“You’re welcome. I think I would’ve been less disgusted finding a pube hair in my food than looking at your face.”

“Well, I would’ve been less disgusted by the waiter clipping his toenails on the table than looking at your face.”

“I would’ve been less disgusted by the waiter admitting he wanted to have a body pillow made with a fully nude picture of me than looking at yours.”

“I’ll just let him have mine,” Jotaro retorted, again using his creepy voice.

That sent you both into a laughing fit, and you held onto his shoulders a little tighter as he shook from laughter. Coming down from the high of it, he looked at you smiling, his eyes telling you the one thing you wanted to hear all night: that you were beautiful to him, in ways that were easily felt but difficult to explain. But, responding to your needs, he decided to try.

“I love you. And I really do think you’re beautiful, in every lighting. I’m sorry for not telling you that, but I guess I figured you’d already know. But that’s an excuse. Just because you know that you are an angel walking amongst men, that shouldn’t stop me from telling you that. It wouldn’t kill me to tell you how your eyeliner kept drawing me in and I was afraid I was making too much eye contact. And it wouldn't hurt to let you know your dress was driving me crazy all night. And that lipstick is the perfect shade for you. And you smelled so warm, like flowers in the summer. And your skin is so glowy I wanted to hold the candle that was on the table up to your face to see the way the light reflected off of different points of your face, but I didn’t because that would’ve been really weird and probably a fire hazard.”

“Well, you had me until the last part. If you had done that I probably would’ve just taken up with the hypothetical body pillow waiter.”

“And I wouldn’t have blamed you. Honestly, I wouldn't blame you even if you chose him now, because he probably wouldn’t have been a douchey boyfriend and not complemented you. In fact, I think with him you’d be drowning in compliments.”

“Ya, all the wrong kinds.”

“I don’t know, I think a dude telling you you have the perfect voice for a hentai would be a compliment of the highest degree.”

“I think the only degree here is the severity of whatever crime he ends up being convicted of.”

“Well, while he’s in jail could I get a second chance?”

“I guess. He did say this could be a good opportunity for us to explore other options. Personally, I think he’s been cheating on me. I’ve seen him on dating sites before.”

“What, 23andMe?”

You laughed, and in his arms you melted.

“And Ancestry.com. Now take me home, good steed.”

“Neighh, alright.”

It was only a few more minutes until you arrived, but you wanted it to take an hour. After making up, there was a warmth between the two of you, and you didn’t want it to end. You caressed the back of his neck as you held on, and he would, on occasion, look down at you and smile fondly. Soon you made it to your front door, and you felt him grip you just a little more securely, as though he’d hold you forever just to keep you from going. But he eventually let you down, and you went to unlock the front door. Since it was a task that required only muscle memory as opposed to your full attention, you were able to turn your head to look at him, and found him staring down at you, the lovesick smile still engraved on his face.

“You know, you’re more than welcome to spend the night. If you want.”

“And if I want to spend every night thereafter?”

“I wouldn’t blame you, but that’ll require a little more of an investment on your end.”

“The kind that goes on your ring finger?”

“Maybe…”

You turned around and led him into the apartment, while unbeknownst to you he fiddled with the investment contained in the box in his pocket.

#jotaro kujo #kujo jotaro #jotaro x reader #jotaro imagine #jotaro part 4 #jotaro part 6 #jojos bizarre adventure #jjba #jotaro/reader

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lonely-space-egg · 2 years ago

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If anyone was wondering what I did for international lesbian day yesterday, it was driving down to Target with my mom to pick up the rest of the G3 core six! [Are they called the core series? Signatures? Wave 1?]

I'm really taken with the whole of G3 thus far - at least, in terms of the dolls. I never held out hope for a revival of G1, and my optimism on a reboot was pretty much dead with how much I disliked G2, so it feels surreal to have new Monster High dolls released in stores that I love once again.

I'll put the rest of my thoughts under the cut, though - it's going to be a long, infodumping, overdetailed post.

I love the more varied body types - which I'll go into more detail on later - and that the average doll has a thicker body overall compared to G1. They feel more sturdy and I expect/hope that they won't get the loose hip or elbow joints that G1 dolls did. The torso articulation is also a very nice touch, especially for helping them balance and stand on their own.

If I ranked the dolls from favorite to least, I'd currently put it at Draculaura, Frankie, Ghoulia, Cleo, Clawdeen, Lagoona. I expect this to change as I restyle the dolls, though, and I also have some actual customization plans to reroot Clawdeen with brown yarn and give Ghoulia a repaint. Clawdeen in particular I expect to like more once she has better hair than that pastel polypropylene.

I liked Cleo a lot more in comparison to the other dolls before I actually unboxed her. Now that I have, her outfit feels. . . quite bland. Her dress is just a one-piece and while she does have a very cute jacket [not pictured], it doesn't fit well over the dress since they're both long-sleeved. I'm also still not a huge fan of the molded-on bandages and I'll likely paint them to make them stand out better. Her headband also stays on rather poorly [so does Draculaura's but unlike Cleo, Draculaura's outfit feels complete even without her headband]. Cleo's face is one of my favorites, though, I think she has the most striking makeup.

The pets are generally decently cute [except Neptuna. Not a fan of whatever's going on there]. I've seen comparisons to Littlest Pet Shop, but to me they look much more like Barbie pets - specifically that it looks like they have eye makeup. They all feel rather lightweight - AKA cheap - but I hope that will make it easier to balance them on the dolls.

I should mention that none of G3 dolls come with stands or brushes. I can see the logic with stands since they can stand on their own - even though it's flawed logic, there's no way they'll stay standing on display. I don't know why they don't have brushes though. Personally I don't mind because I have more G1 brushes than anyone could ever need, but their hair is clearly meant to be played with and styled so it's an interesting choice not to include them. Speaking of which, none of them have glue seepage or unnecessary gel in their hair - not something I can say for many G1 lines. I will also complain about some of their accessories not quite matching the rest of their color scheme [ex: Frankie's shoes don't match any of the other pinks in their outfit] but this was also present in G1. I am disappointed at the lack of diaries as well.

Close-up on all of their bags. All of them except Clawdeen's have backpack straps, and Cleo's is the only one that snaps open - all the rest have an opening in the top that the thinner accessories can be slid into. Draculaura, Lagoona, Cleo, and Ghoulia's backpacks also have loops to carry them like handbags, but the ones on Ghoulia's are oddly small.

Draculaura's bag gives her little bat wings when she wears it and it is the cutest thing in the world. She also has this little white cameo necklace which you can just barely see in this picture - wondering if there's lore significance to that or just an outfit detail.

Draculaura also has a widow's peak now! I love it, and I'm looking forward to one of the leaked[?] Draculaura dolls that doesn't have bangs and thus shows it off.

More accessories, specifically Ghoulia's. The knock-off Switch is adorable - quite possibly my favorite of the handheld G3 items so far - and if Mattel hasn't come up with a monster pun for it, I hope someone in the fandom has. The skateboard having Deadfast on it is another detail I really like [though it's now a good time to complain mention that the print on practically all the accessories - that is, electronics, food, etc. - looks very blurry].

I was able to balance Ghoulia standing on her skateboard which I'm thrilled about. In general I love that the g3 dolls can stand on their own. Still not a replacement for stands, but it does make for more posing options for photography.

More Ghoulia since she's still my favorite character of the main six, even with the design changes [I anxiously await seeing her animated adaptation beyond promo renders]. Her shirt design reads very neurodivergence/autism symbol to me :] Sir Hoots-a-lot can attach to her forearm - much like an LPS owl - and with the G3 pets being rather lightweight, he stays on well without weighing her arm down. Those are his glasses she's wearing here because I think they look much better than her actual glasses, which have these thick, foggy lenses that obscure her eyes. I don't know what the deal is with those - G1 Ghoulia had lens that were transparent just fine, and then G3 Clawdeen's glasses don't have lenses at all.

More on the different body types! Most of the main six [Frankie, Clawdeen, Lagoona, and Ghoulia] have the same torso. Frankie has longer forearms and shins, Draculaura is all-around shorter with thicker hips, thighs and limbs, and Cleo is the same height with a tighter waist and, in comparison, wider hips. Otherwise, their bodies are the same proportions.

The above image to the left is a comparison of the forearms and hands of G3 Draculaura, Ghoulia, Frankie and G1 Catrine. The G1 arm is slimmer than the G3 dolls, and Draculaura's arm is slightly thicker than the other G3s. The G3 dolls have thicker arm and hand pegs- sort of like CAM dolls - which I'm very thankful for, I feel less concerned about snapping them while putting them back in place or pulling them out. The G3 dolls also have larger hands than G1 which I quite like.

On the right is a close-up of Frankie's prosthetic leg. I love the detail in it, especially that "Frankie" is written as if Frankie wrote it themself. I'm disappointed to see it's not removable, though - Vandala Doubloons from G1 had a removable leg so I don't see why they couldn't do it here. Ghoulia's legs are beside Frankie's to hopefully show how Frankie's are longer.

Even with the different body types, the clothing is still rather interchangeable between characters! I wouldn't mind if the clothes weren't - Monster High clothes are so character-specific that I've long seen it as the perfect doll line for varied body types - but it's definitely a pro that they are. Their tops fit each other very well. Draculaura's pants are a little loose on Frankie, but it just means they sit lower on their hips. Frankie's skirt fits Draculaura nicely, though it would be much easier to dress her in if it had velcro all the way down the back. Frankie's belt just barely fits Draculaura, but really who's going to be wearing that besides Frankie.

A major part of why Draculaura and Frankie are my favorite signature dolls of the main six are their clothing layers. They both have these sleeveless tops [a "corset" and vest, respectively] that work as tops on their own, and the blouses underneath them also work on their own as shirts. With their jackets [capelet and jacket, that is] they have the most complex outfits of the whole line.

Last but not least, a closeup on Clawdeen's shoes. They're my favorites out of the line, largely because of that pawprint tread. This picture also hopefully shows how those are not actual socks on her, but leg warmers. I also ended up demonstrating how ridiculously poofy that polypropylene hair is. I look forward to rerooting her more and more.

#autism won today #if anyone's wondering the final word count on this post: it's 1381 #peri talks #infodump #long post #monster high #mh dolls #monster high gen 3 #doll collecting #dollblr #draculaura #frankie stein #clawdeen wolf #lagoona blue #cleo de nile #ghoulia yelps #fun fact i used a catrine for the comparison bc she's the only doll i don't have posed on display atm #also this uh. went up a few hours later than intended because i FELL ALSEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF WRITING THIS GOODBYE #ALSO THIS ENDED UP AS MY 666TH POST

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servpls-enthusiast · 3 years ago

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Burn My Skin - Part II

Pairing : Cordelia Goode x Fem!Reader

Words count : 3966

A/n : The title was based on my favorite song ever which it’s called “ Queima Minha Pele - Baco Exu do Blues “… I hope you’ll enjoy the chapter :)

Part I

You and Zoe were in the living room watching an horror movie, only the two of you considering how late it already was, a pillow covering your mouth to prevent you from laughing out loud at your friend’s scare jumps. She was so easy to frighten sometimes, you secretly loved it. She had her arm around your shoulder as she would occasionally hide in your neck when the movie got too spooky, a soft purple blanket covering your legs from the chill air. The environment was quiet until you hear heels clicking against the wood floor and voices coming from up the stairs. Both Cordelia and Fiona were coming down, all dressed up in fancy outfits, they were probably going out, too late for your will but it was none of your concern. They stopped on their way towards the front door when seeing you girls on the couch. Delia was stunning in her suit, and once again you forgot how to breath, your chest complaining to the lack of it merely seconds later. Well, that wasn't supposed to be happening. You got over her. Her eyes curiously watching your frames, however you pretended not to notice, returning your gaze back to the TV screen. The footsteps came back and Cordelia stoped in front of you, both of her hands resting on her hips.

" What are you doing up this late? You should be in bed, just like the others! “ The thick voice of Cordelia make itself present to your ears. How ironic of her to mention the clock hm?!

" Sorry Cordelia, we were not tired yet and since my laptop’s acting up we figured we could watch something here for a bit “

"Right, but don't take long to go to bed, tomorrow morning I want you both up for your classes and don’t you dare saying you’re sleepy or I’ll punish you girls “ You internally cringed at how rude that sentence sounded, you’ve never heard those words and tone before but you figured she was just annoyed at your presence.

"We got this, boss! Hmm now, were are you guys going at such time? It's already late, you said it yourself " Cordelia frowns a bit. You didn’t know that herself didn’t want to go out but the Supreme insisted, claiming she wanted some time alone with her precious daughter, which sounded even stranger for Cordelia when coming from her mother’s mouth.

"Me and my mom have some private business to work on, we won't be taking long to return tho " She responded but before Zoe could say something, Fiona walked in, rudely interrupting the brief conversation.

" Oh, God have mercy! Stop lying to these girls, they're grown-up already. We're going out to get wasted. If you excuse us little witchy, we’re already late. Hurry up, Cordelia! " Fiona left before any other exchanges of words, walking towards the door on her way out the streets.

You didn’t know why you suddenly felt your chest getting too tight for your heart that moment, something in the back of your head whispered that their nightcap was a terrible idea but you couldn’t put your finger on that and just say out loud they should stay home, you had no choice but uncomfortably ignore it. Later that night you wished you had stopped them from leaving.

" Are you gonna stay safe here by yourself, right? Please don't wait too long to go to sleep and don’t forget to lock the doors, I'll take an extra key with me "

" We're fine, you don't have to worry! " Zoe winks at the concerned woman, whose now staring at you, internally irritated to the fact you haven’t once looked up at her yet.

" Y/n, promise me you’ll be ok? Call me if you need me? “ Her voice softened to the mention of your name, your cheeks burning a bit as you meet her eyes for the first time, your mind screaming for you to just give her a quick hug and reassure her you’re ok, nonetheless you simply shrugs.

" I'm okay, Cordelia! Like your mother said, I'm a grown up. You can go enjoy yourself." She just nodded, whispering a "good night" and stepping out of your sight.

You threw the blanket aside and got up when you were sure both women were out of the house. " Zoe, I said I wouldn't think about Cordelia anymore but when Fiona said they were going heading out I had this awful feeling in my chest. You know I’m never wrong when I sense these shit, something’s gonna happen “ You starts hyperventilating, immediately regretting not warning Delia. " What do you mean, Y/n? What exactly did you feel? "

" I-I don't know, my chest got so tight and my heart was just too fast, and I got those chills I always have when something’s about to happen. You know I never feel that stuff if something serious ain’t going on Zoey “ You nervously chew your nails and Zoe gets up towards you, holding your hands in attempt to drive your attention back to her instead.

" Jesus Christ, your hands are freezing! " She hugs you as concern takes over her, she indeed does know you wouldn’t act up like that if nothing was wrong " Look, calm down ok? We both know that Cordelia is responsible and careful, she’s all powerful and her mother’s the Supreme herself, if there’s someone who’s perfectly capable of protecting her is Fiona. I bet they’re just gonna bump into some drunk assholes, ok? It’s gonna be fine “

" Yeah, might be, but I swear if anything happens to her I won’t forgive myself "

" Nothing's gonna happen. Now why don’t we try to get back to bed hm? It's late as hell and you better get some rest, we have some boring classes tomorrow ugh “ She let go off your hands and grab the remote control to turn off the TV, you fidgets still biting your nails yet you just agrees with heading back to yours and your best friend’s shared room.

The brown haired witch didn’t want to add more fuel to the fire but she was too now highly worried about the two women out there, not even once she had seen your sensing going wrong but she just crossed her fingers this time you’d be mistaken.

xxx

Three hours more or less passed by, a calming sleep surrounding your being, until a very vivid nightmare begins its way right in front of your eyes, replacing the pitch black with images of a bar, not too crowded but not empty as well. Cordelia was there, shots after shots of tequila going down her throat as an unheard conversation was settled between herself and her mother whose was next to her, following her drinking actions.

A quick jump in the scenes and Cordelia was now washing her sweaty face in the sink, her face all disturbed looking as she squeezes her eyes shut to stop the world from spinning around her eyes. After that things are just blurry, you couldn’t see her face or barely anything anymore but you could hear desperate high pitched screams, a black shadow leaving by the door as Cordelia’s body falls on her knees to the ground, her hands agonizingly scratching her face to the dreadful pain all over it.

You wake up panting, tears run down your cheeks as sharp knives felt like stabbing your chest repeatedly, you clumsily kick the blankets out of your legs as it instantaneously feels like burning your skin. You knew it wasn’t just a nightmare, Cordelia urgently needed help but something tells you it was too late for that. Zoe was still serenely asleep in the bed next to yours, you gets up just to shake her shoulders, not worrying about either scaring her or being gentle, there was no time for such things. Before the girl could even begin to process what you were up to your door gets abruptly yanked, a breathless Queenie comes through rambling almost unrecognizable words but you didn’t need anything to understand. Running out of your room you stumbles your way downstairs, almost bumping into a few girls gathering in the middle of the living room. They were crying. " What happened? " You asked to one of them but no sound did come out, deep down you didn’t need an answer but still you prayed with everything you were still trapped in a nightmare. You went to another girl, repeating the question, and there it was, all the words you didn’t want to hear. You immediately starts sobbing again, closing your eyes as the chest stabs return in full strength. Zoe runs to your side and grabs you by the shoulders, begging you to look at her and take deep breaths.

" How the hell am I supposed to do that Zoe? I fucking could have stopped that, I knew something was up but just because of my fucking proud I didn’t protect her. FUCK! “ You yelled, harsher than you planned, you couldn’t care less that moment. Your eyes scan around the room just to find Fiona elegantly sitting down, a cigarette in between the tip of her fingers just like nothing had happened to her daughter.

" Where is she uh? Why are you so calm? I bet you did it to her! " You spit and watches the older witch smirks, blowing the smoke that was in her mouth. You notice a few tear strains down her cheeks but you would get no surprised if learning that it was all just part of her show.

" I didn't do anything, my dear. She's in the hospital, you don't have to worry “

" What the hell, Fiona? How can you be so heartless? You leave her alone out there and you dare to tell me not to worry? I'll make sure you burn in hell when all this is over, you bitch! " You threatened yet the woman only scoffed, placing the cigarette back between her lips. You’d deal with her another time. You closed your eyes and concentrated, focusing on your Delia as you struggled to locate her. Gathering enough focus you picture the hospital, teleporting there with no second thoughts.

You stood in front of the door, dark lights flicking above your head, you knew she was in there, a part of you didn’t want to see the damaged you had caused, but afterwards, it was your mess to fix up and you hoped with everything in you she’d forgive you some day. Turning the door knob and finally coming in you squeezes your eyes a bit, it was hard to see due the bad lights but in the middle of the room her limp body rests on the bed, no movements. You walk closer, fearing how bad she had been hurt. The soft pale skin of her face was now in living skin, covered in nasty burns yet to necrose, you doubt her eyes would ever be the same anymore after such attack. You carefully grab your beloved’s hand, scared you’ll disturb her somehow but too worried to step back. You needed her to feel you there, at least if only for a shorten time.

" I'm so, so sorry, my Delia. I failed you so bad this time. I hope you can forgive me one day. " You whispers, chastely kissing her head where you knew she wasn’t injured. Your body hurting in all the ways but for sure it was nothing like what she was going through that moment. You stood there all night long, watching her sleep and silently taking care of her, just like you used to when she was hurting before, you weren’t hugging her like the old times but you never let go off her hand. On your mind no matter what happens, Cordelia would always be the beautifulest woman alive.

xxx

The woman was terribly debilitated after the acid attack, thankfully many people were there to help her which soothed a little bit of your worry. After that day you drifted further away from people, it didn’t feel right just walking away but whenever you’d look someone in the eyes you’d sense their judgments towards you. You didn’t know if those times your powers were actually working or if it was just overthinking along with self-loathing taking its places on your mind but one or another it felt too much for you to be around them, which indeed may sound selfish. You would always make sure Cordelia was safe though, not directly with her as you feared her rejection but constantly keeping your eyes open, sometimes even teleporting to her room for a few seconds just to give her a quick forehead kiss when she was asleep.

Along with the new scars Delia had also gained a new gift. She was blind, that was a fact, but now she could see through other ways who wouldn’t involve using her eyes. Whenever she touched people’s skins she’d have the most vivid visions of them, including their deepest secrets, it was like she was momentarily seeing through whoever’s eyes her hands dared to touch. The newest power itself made you much more afraid to go next to her, what if she sees that you could have saved her but due pure childishness you hadn’t? In one of these visions she accidentally found out Hank was cheating on her with another witch, it broke her a little bit more but she wasn’t necessarily surprised, it was all she needed to kick him out of her life and house for once. She knew their relationship was long broken. You felt bad for her, but you couldn't say you were sad, she deserved better. You thought things were finally calming down and getting back to its orbit, a part of you getting used to the distance from her even if you were both under the same roof practically all the time.

You currently found yourself taking care of her plants in the greenhouse, one of your earbuds randomly playing your playlists when you hear the sound of a cane clicking on the floor, followed by her presence. She stops in the middle of the room as her head aimlessly moves from one side to another, hopefully giving her any signs of your location.

" I might not see you but I know you are here Y/n. I can feel you, please don't run away from me this time, I just want to talk "

Teleporting did cross your mind, but you figured it was time to stop being a coward and deal with whatever consequences your actions might had. " Hi Delia, yes, I'm here and I'm not running away. I’m sorry for the other times “ She follows your voice as her face turns right to where you stands. " I appreciate that. Just please answer me, and I don't want lies, ok? " She asked and you hums "Why did you do that? “

There it was, the question you did not want to hear. How are you to explain her you didn’t save her because you were too proud to look her in the eyes and warn her like you normally would? And that the main reason was pure jealousy and stubbornness. She’d find you so pathetic! You just decide to play innocent and see how things will go, which drives her angry " Why what, Cordelia? I’m confused “

" Don’t you fucking act like you have no clue what you’ve done. I’m tired with all this. Why did you do that? “ Her arms loosely hitting her sides as her body language shows how irritated she is, her cane hitting the floor a little too harsh, yet you were no surprised “ Why did you push me away without even letting me know what I did to infuriate you so much you’d literally run whenever I’d step into the same room as you? We were inseparable and suddenly you changed, what the hell happened? “ Your eyes widen to the sound of her voice breaking and her unexpected words, her figure irradiating frustration and confusion. You stepped closer to the woman watching her flinch a bit as she senses your presence approaching, you lift one of your hands and touches her own, feeling it shaking a bit. You’ve always loved the softness on them. Regret filling you as you realize you ended up hurting your friend even more by clouding your emotions with your platonic, childish jealousy and overthinking. Cordelia have never treated you poorly, not even once.

“ Oh Delia, I wasn’t expecting you to say that right now, you know? I thought you were mad at me and I figured I should give you some space, especially after all you’ve been through “

“ Now you’re back with ‘ Delia ‘. Jesus, Y/n why on earth would I be mad at you? And when did you think it was a good idea to leave me when all I needed was you with me? If you only knew how bad I wished you were there but now you’re a master in pretending you don’t even know me. Do you care explaining what did I do?

“ Shit, I didn’t plan this conversation coming today, I’m sorry. Hm, I know it might sound stupid from me but I just thought you were disappointed at me because I sensed something bad was gonna happen the day you were attacked and I didn’t warn you and Fiona, forgive me, I overreacted “

“ Oh bullshit, what do you even mean? I didn’t even know you had sensed such things Y/n and even if I had to, it was nobody’s fault and I doubt you’d have stopped me from going out that night if you really wanted to. Besides, I know that’s not the main reason for such behavior, you keep forgetting I know when people are not being all honest. You broke your promise about being with me at my worst and best, now I’d urge you to tell me the truth “ Cordelia’s voice was thick, ironic even, she’d never used such tone towards you before, however, could you blame her? You knew you had to act maturely now, to let her know the real motivations behind your actions, even fearing that deep down she’d get disgusted by such revelations, she wouldn’t let you fool her any second further.

“ First of all, I’m not lying “ Before you can continue Cordelia interrupts you by saying you are not being completely honest, too. You irritatedly groans, getting slightly annoyed whenever someone cuts you off “ Allow me to finish, Cordelia. As I was saying, I’m not lying. But you’re right, that’s not the whole thing “ You pauses, your defensive side unguardedly building up as you watches the blondie’s forehead frown and her breathing turning somewhat unsteady “ If what I am to tell you bothers you I beg you to just leave, you don’t have to spit any slurs or anything. I apologize for the way I reacted, I just couldn’t find any other ways to project my feelings towards you, I guess. It probably wasn’t the best choice but I was scared, I still am in fact “ You stumbles upon your own words not even making sure if what you say makes sense, you just need her to stop burning holes in your frame, yes, you knew she technically couldn’t see you but Cordelia’s ways of staring at someone’s soul was beyond the ordinary, common way. She was, in fact, staring at you.

“ Y/n, what do you mean by that? I’m afraid I don’t get what you’re trying to tell me here, honey “ You knew she wasn’t being all sincere, Cordelia Goode was no fool and with the mere stimulation of her own beautiful, intelligent brain she’d catch the minimum details, gathering everything up and reading anybody’s emotions like no one ever did.

“ I-I meant exactly what you’re thinking, Delia. Shit, I’m sorry, that wasn’t supposed to happen. I’m sorry if you think that somehow I took advantage of the trust you gave me, I didn’t even realize I was falling for you that way but once I heard you and Hank once things just got so, so overwhelming, I knew it wasn’t correct, I couldn’t keep on feeling such nasty things for you so I just figured I should step back, and now you probably think that was indeed the best opti- “ Once again your rambling was interrupted but this time by a pair of mushy lips on your left cheek followed by two hands clumsily stroking the sides of your face, you froze as you realize how close Cordelia was, confusion taking over your mind as you momentarily panic with the sudden, unexpected reaction.

“ Did you know you talk impossibly much when you’re nervous, sweetheart? “ Cordelia’s delicate tone invades your ears, stopping you from wondering much longer what was going on. A part of her face covered by a pair of sunglasses, preventing you from directly visualizing the faded dark pink skin around her once brown eyes but yet, not failing in making a warm blush spread all over your cheeks. She was, in fact, staring at you.

She was impossibly close to you at this point, her lips perfectly aligned with yours, only not completely glued for a matter of millimeters, you couldn’t breathe, her floral scent numbing each part of your brain, were you in one of your impossible sapphic dreams or…? “ My sweet “ Cordelia whispers right before her lips fully meet yours, your eyes closing without further ado as you delights yourself in her mouth, one of her hands rising up as she gently scraps the tip of her fingers on your scalp, adding some pressure to the spot, which you undoubtedly allows as you unconsciously moans against herself. You firmly wraps your arms around her slim waist, feeling the cotton on her long sleeved blouse. You never thought you’d say this but just like in one of those clichés, you had found the perfect spot to spend the rest of your days at, you didn't want to get out of the coziness on her touch as you found yourself expeditiously getting addicted to one of the most intimate sides of Cordelia Goode. She breaks contact, leading you to annoyingly whine at her, wishing nothing more than to live against her lips. She never stepped back, however.

“ Hm, does that mean you don’t hate me right now?“ Your voice comes out hoarsely, more than you intended to, well that was just her effect on your afterwards “ You seriously need to stop listening to your thoughts, Y/n. You’d have realized how fond of you I grew if you weren’t so lost on your own mind, my beautiful girl “ One of her hands caressing your neck as a graceful smile paints her lips while she talks, her cheeks slightly reddened, a little bit like yours, and she bites her lips which you can’t help but stare. God, how on heavens can someone look that ravishing? It’s your turn to boldly pull her face back to yours by the back of her neck, you honestly don’t think you can spend another second away from her, not again. You switch positions with Cordelia, placing one of your hands behind her on the table, pinning her bottom against the wooden as your front collides to hers, both of your chests rubbing against one another as your tongue savors her plump, soon to be swollen lips and your hands bluntly caress every inch of what you can reach on her skin. You feel the other woman’s smile against your mouth as your tongue shyly begs for access to her own. Cordelia was indeed just like the sun, lightening up your day as she burns your skin in the most addicting ways.

#sarah paulson #cordelia goode #cordelia foxx #ahs cordelia #cordelia goode x reader #cordelia foxx x reader #american horror story #lgbtqia #sarah paulson x reader

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storiesforallfandoms · 4 years ago

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lock the door ~ ben hargreeves;the umbrella academy

word count: 990

request?: yes!

“Yay requests are open! Your writing is amazing and you are one of my favs. I was wondering if I could request a ben hargreeves imagine with some smut. That boy has my heart and I need more imagines with him. If not then maybe something a lil steamy with him. Thank you”

description: in which he forgets to lock the bedroom door, and their least favorite (or favorite, depending on who you ask) sibling walks in

pairing: ben hargreeves x female!reader

warnings: swearing, slight smut

masterlist

One of the perks of having a huge house that was usually empty was having multiple options of where to get intimate without the fear of getting caught. Your and Ben’s choice for the day: the shower.

You guys were sure it was the safest place to go. No one walked into a bathroom with the shower going, even if the door was unlocked. As long as the two of you remained quiet enough so that anyone who may come home couldn’t hear you, you were set for at least 40 minutes - an hour if the hot water cooperated.

That’s where you found yourself on that particular day: your legs wrapped around Ben’s waist, his dick deep inside of you as he lifted you up and down on him, the still boiling hot water raining down on your back.

Your head was against Ben’s shoulder, his bare skin pulled between your teeth as you tried to muffle your moans. Your slight biting was causing Ben to let out low groans into your ear.

Suddenly, you both heard the doorknob turn and the bathroom door squeak open. Ben was quick to hold you to him and you quickly buried your head in his neck in order to keep any accidental sounds from coming out.

“Ben, you’ve been in here for so long, I gotta piss,” came Klaus’ voice.

Ben rolled his eyes and sighed heavily. "There’s like a million bathrooms in this place.”

“There’s two, only one of them has an actual toilet and it’s this one.”

Ben let out a frustrated noise. “Okay, just...just give me a minute, okay? I’m almost done.”

“No man, I can’t wait! I gotta pee now!”

You tried not to giggle as you heard Klaus opening the toilet seat lid.

“No Klaus!” Ben snapped. “Just get out!”

“Why?!”

“Because I don’t wanna listen to you taking a fucking piss!”

Suddenly, Ben’s grip faltered for just a second, causing you to slip. In a moment of fear, you let out a squeal and tightened your grip around Ben’s neck, trying to keep yourself from falling. Ben put a hand on the wall to steady the both of you, holding you tighter with his other hand.

There was a moment of silence. There was no way Klaus didn’t hear the sound you made, and there was no way he’d ever think it could possibly be Ben. He definitely knew, and knowing Klaus, he’d never let you or Ben live that down.

“Okay,” Klaus finally said. “I’ll go pee outside. You can finish your...shower. I’ll lock the door behind me so no one else walks in on your...shower.”

The door basically slammed behind him, but you could still hear Klaus’ laugh on the other side.

Ben helped pulled you off of him and gently set you down on the shower floor. Your legs were so wobbly from pleasure and from lack of use you had to sit on the floor. The two of you looked at each other for a long time, sending each other a silent message as Ben reached to turn the shower off: the mood was effectively ruined.

The two of you dried yourselves off and re-dressed. You were dreading stepping out of the bathroom and having to face Klaus.

“Maybe he left the house,” Ben said. “Maybe he went to meet up with his other junkie friends and we can get out before he comes back.”

“You’d have to come back eventually, Ben, you live here,” you reminded him.

“I could stay with you.”

“You could, but Klaus is your brother. You can’t run from him forever.”

Ben looked as though he were thinking for a moment before finally letting out a sigh of frustration and opening the bathroom door. A rush of cold air filled the warm bathroom as you followed Ben out and to his room.

On the way to his room, you heard a door open - Klaus’ door. You both shared another look before turning to look at Klaus.

“Have a nice shower you two?” he asked, a smirk on his face.

“Fuck off, Klaus,” Ben retorted. “You better not breathe a word of this to anyone.”

Klaus shrugged. “Who would I tell that would actually listen? Luther and Allison are too busy sucking face, Diego doesn’t give a shit, Five is too young to hear that stuff, and Vanya...well Vanya also doesn’t give a shit. Pogo may want to know, just so he doesn’t accidentally walk into anything he doesn’t wanna see like I did.”

“Don’t you dare tell Pogo,” Ben hissed.

You put a hand on his shoulder to try and calm him down. He looked down at you and you offered him a small smile. He smiled back and allowed you to step away from him, approaching Klaus.

“You’re not gonna tell anyone about what you saw, Klaus,” you told him. “Not your siblings, not your robo-mom, and certainly not Pogo. You hear me?”

Klaus raised an eyebrow at you. “And why wouldn’t I do that?”

“Because if you do I will rip your nuts off and shove them down your own throat, do I make myself clear there?”

Klaus’ eyes widened and his legs crossed. He nodded, unable to get his voice to work, before turning back into his room and slamming the door shut. Ben’s eyes were just as wide as Klaus’ had been, but the smile on his face was more impressed than Klaus’ had been.

“That was so hot,” he said, approaching you and kissing you again. “I think I’m definitely in the mood again.”

You giggled and kissed him again, your moment being ruined as Klaus called, “Go to your fucking bedroom this time!”

The two of you laughed as Ben swept you up in his arms and carried you to his room, far away from Klaus’ room and making sure to lock the door behind him this time.

#ben hargreeves #ben hargreeves imagine #ben hargreeves smut #ben hargreeves x reader #justin h min #justin h min x reader #justin h min smut #justin h min imagine #The Umbrella Academy #the umbrella academy imagine #imagine #one shot #smut #request #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

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zaneaquaman · 2 years ago

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Coming out At Thanksgiving

My hands shake as I sit with my new therapist who questions me about how I am feeling about coming out to my extended family this upcoming Thanksgiving. She looks at me expectantly, trying to piece together the stories that spill out of my mouth as I explain to her (my cisgender, straight therapist with not nearly enough training in this area) why the fear of their reactions still clings to my heart and why I know that, after this Thanksgiving, nothing will be the same during our family dinners.

I came out to my parents on my birthday, the only day they weren’t allowed to hate me even if they hated who I admitted I was. In my head, there was no option of being kicked out of the streets. I told myself either it would go well enough for me to get by in the house or I wouldn’t wake up tomorrow – it was up to my parents to decide.

We sat in their bedroom as I told them who I was and that I was their son. My mom’s face reeled in disgust as my father simply kept repeating that he didn’t understand. He’d further push to find cracks in my knowledge in an attempt to prove to me that I couldn’t possibly understand what I claim to be if he couldn’t understand it. My mother said various phrases, all of which I had read about online beforehand in preparation for the criticism I knew I would receive that night: “But you’re a girl”, “God gave you this body”, “You can’t ruin this body”, “You’re too young to know”, “You always liked your chest”, “You never hated wearing dresses and skirts”, “You never thought about this before”, “Where did you get this idea from? Is it from one of your friends?”, “Maybe you’ll grow out of it”, “You’ll think differently when you get older”, “Don’t make any life choices that you’ll regret later”, “You’re nothing like boys”, “You don’t want to be a boy”, “You hate boys”, “Why did you want to go to an all-girls school then?”, “You don’t even know what boys are like so how can you want to be one?”, “You’ll think differently when you actually talk to boys”, “No one will see you as a boy”, “You’ll always be my little girl”, “No one will love you if you choose this”, “No one will ever love who you are now”, “No one will ever understand you”, “I hope you change your mind”, “Being transgender is just a recent trend; it didn’t exist until 20 years ago”, “You will confuse everyone”, “How do you know you want to be a boy?”, “Are you sure you want to choose this?”, “Do you know the life you are choosing?”, “Who even are you anymore?” and on and on until they both ran out of conservative phrases to say and opted to say they still loved me, but they do not understand me. Two years have passed since I came out to them and they still do not understand me. My father is quiet in his lack of understanding, whereas my mother, despite two years of having to adjust, still slips up and claims she needs more time. Four months ago, she lectured me on why I should not live in a male dorm even though I am a man. One month ago, I received a package from her with my dead name written on it for all my friends to see. Last week, my mother tried to encourage me to take some feminine clothes with me back to my dorm. I said I’ll consider, and I left all the clothes with her when I flew back to my college dorm (my home-away-from-home that feels more comfortable for me than my real home).

What I try to tell my therapist, and what she doesn’t seem to understand, is that for my own protection, my family had decided to tell my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and extended family about me while I was away. The therapist thought it would be better to say it in person. I agree to some extent but, with a family as conservative as mine and my mental state that is currently balancing on a thread, my mom argued that it would be better for them to find out before I arrive and have time to cool down before seeing me again in person.

Another subject that my therapist doesn’t quite grasp is that people generally do not want to acknowledge I am transgender. It’s easier to slip up and call me she, a daughter, a woman, and my deadname than to view me as the “abomination” that I am. If there is no one to correct them while I am away, they do not bother to try to correct themselves. If there is no one to push them to tell others about the fact that I am transgender, they will not bother to push themselves to say it. My mom has had almost three months to tell my extended family about me. Despite constant reminders from me in the form of texts and calls, she doesn’t fulfill her promise to tell them while I am away. Instead, she pushes the burden onto my father. He tells them the week before Thanksgiving.

This past month, I heard someone say they don’t want others to assume they are gay. My face twists in muted disgust and offense. Why would it bother someone if they are assumed to be something that is not an insult? If they aren’t gay, they can always say that outright without any consequences, whereas if you are gay, you know deep in your heart the fear that comes with first admitting you are and the tension of waiting to know the other person’s response. You can always correct people and say that you are straight, and nothing will be said against you. When you correct someone and say you’re gay, you always have to prepare yourself for the chance that you’re about to be bombarded with hatred and assaults of various kinds.

I returned to my family the week before Thanksgiving for a weekend trip. I attend a carnival at my old middle school, wearing a hat with my name clearly spray-painted on it while parents, teachers, and students alike ignore it and call me my dead name. Even the teachers that were told about me do not comment on me being transgender, nor do they even say my name as if the subject itself terrifies them.

My uncle comes up to me and says hello without any further comment. I’m told by my dad later that my uncle was alerted about me being transgender before that day, yet he still said nothing to me about it even though it was the first time I had seen him in months – even though he knew about me; even though he must have known that I know he knows about me. My father claims my uncle will tell the rest of his family before I arrive for Thanksgiving. My only questions are if he really will and when.

I have breakfast with my partner who asks if I am nervous about Thanksgiving and my extended family's reactions. Chewing my food slowly to provide me more time to think, I answer by simply saying I think everything will go alright. I don’t tell them that if something goes wrong, I might fall down a never-ending black hole that leads to a dark place I no longer want to go back to. I don’t tell them that I expect to disappear into the bathroom that day to cry and hide from the world because I know I won’t be able to handle the pressure. I don’t tell them that, although I am eternally grateful they are joining me on my trip down to my family for Thanksgiving, it will crush me to hear my family call me something I am not and for my partner to be there to witness it.

My therapist asks me if I am nervous too. I say I am fine and that I don’t care what others will think of me. She nods, that being the only thing she fully understands, and ignores the way I hollow out as I leave her office and walk back into the real world.

#lgbtq characters #lgbtq community #lgbtqiia+#lgbt representation #coming out #transgender #transgender awareness week #trans struggles #trans pride #transgender community #transgender youth #protect trans youth #trans masc #thanksgiving #holiday #family issues #family stress #family dynamics #parents

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kurosstuff · 4 years ago

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A/N: so here's a donna x reader thing I thought of!! Also the reader is a maiden a head maid to be more exact- made the header with the only pic that DIDN'T come out terribly??? Idk how the fuck to make them?? Its- technically first pov but isnt exactly written that way idk man I'm dumb

Warning(s): blood, angie swears because I say so. Goes into slight depth of a small injury. FEMALE READER, panic attack(s) SPOILERS!! AND ANGST- this isnt a nice fic. It's not even close haha(but I changed some stuff around to make more sense so fuck you♡)

Donna Beneviento x F!reader: Right place. Wrong time

Parties sucked. Being a handmaid was fun and all but the biggest downside is you have to attend these.. events? You weren't entirely sure what they were but Lady Dimitrescu was very clear on you attending to assist her and the other lords during this time

"I swear if it weren't for Mother Miranda" Lady Dimitrescu spat out at the drunken fool-no her brother? You weren't actually sure what he was to her but they acted like siblings. Mother Miranda help anyone who asks- last person who did landed in the cellar "I would have kicked you out." Taking a drag from her cigarette. Leaning down and blowing into his face making the man start yelling as Moreau hide behind the table yet again-unless he wished to be dragged into the fight as well as he usually did during this time

If it weren't for two things happening with you. You'd probably laugh. But with how many villagers there are-the ones who hurt you. Your anxiety was racing. Even worse when the lord-no the women you were very interested in was here as well. The mysterious women dressed in all black as usual, Donna Beneviento and her doll companion, Angie by her side looking around frantically at all the new people. Jumping up and down excitedly

Deep breath...

Deep.. breath..

Turning you started out the door. Thankfully being the head maid you wouldn't exactly get in trouble with an extent of course(also helped the fact the lady and her daughters were well aware of your anxiety and were surprisingly kind about it?). As you moved you were unaware of a pair of painted eyes glancing at you before turning to another

The cool breeze in the air calmed you as you roamed around the garden. If it weren't for the weather it would have been such a beautiful sight. Well more then it was. Dispite the chilly air as winter was just rolling around the corner. The indication of it creeping up a bit closer with the speaks of ice and snow arounding around and on the flowers. Personally decorating then with their own weather, the crunch under your feet became louder as you got farther away from everyone

"So this is where you went?" A voice called out behind you, stiffening in response you could only hope for the best as you turned-half expecting one of the sisters, but you knew better then to assume that-if it was they'd have bitten you gently-as they could-before dragging you off somewhere

Turning around your assumption was proven correct. Standing infront of you was a small porcelain doll, odd colors painted on but overall handled with such care-you stared in awe before remembering yourself. Kneeling down a bit infront of the doll you smiled

"Why, hello Lady Angie" you started with a smile-watching the mock of a shock on her face, her mouth a gap more then it was before "would you like something?" Speaking softly to ensure not upsetting the doll if you even could? You weren't sure but you've heard that she had a temper of sorts on her

With a mock scuff Angie threw her hands in the air happily "ooo! 'Lady'? Can't remember the last person to call me that seriously" with a scratchy giggle she bounced around you happily. Almost intrigued with you "and what do I want? Hmm" she stopped infront of you again crossing her wooden arms in thought

"Walk with me"

She spoke suddenly after a moment rushing off you in tow- before her foot caught the long dress of hers. Almost sending her falling if you didn't grab her hoisting her up in your arms suddenly. Standing frozen for a second before placing her down gently

"Sorry Lady Angie." Looking her over you nodding in note of no injuries seen on the poor doll "rude to not ask but I'm glad your alright" before looking around her again to ensure you didn't miss anything.

Angie stood head titled to her side interested, holding her arms up to you she made grabby hands like a toddler would when wanting up. "Pick me up" she ordered with a giggle, kneeling down you gently grabbed her. Picking her up you held her against her hip, almost like a mom holding a baby or a toddler it seemed to be the best choice-her reaction was a happy laugh. Pointing off to a room she nodded her head towards there

"Off we go then Lady Angie" you said, walking to the door across the wintered garden. Opening the room to show the indoor version. After all Bela-the eldest likes to do some research on them every now and again-and some of the gardening things held vegetables for the other maidens to keep them "fresh" as they said.

The greenish room should more of the vibrant colors of the objects then the snowy wind from outside. Catching your attention was the chorus of 'down's' repeatedly from the doll-who in turn was put down on the floor gently. Rushing off she called for you to join her. Following close by you couldn't help but smile at her child like nature-dispite her crazy nature, it was very enduring

Turning the corner you didn't expect to see her maker-the lady of the Beneviento house. Donna Beneviento also the same one who caught your attention from seeing her for the first time. Growing a bit flustered you bowed your head towards her-gaining a snicker from Angie who whispered-or at least seemed like it- to the veiled women. Of what? You weren't sure but it must have been something if she suddenly jolted up almost nervous like

"Hello Lady Beneviento" you responded carefully. It was obvious to anyone who sees the Lady- she seems to not be be used to being social with others, "its nice to meet you, My lady" speaking formally as you've been taught-and reprimanded for repeatedly in the past. Thankfully now it stuck

Nothing but silence filled the room. No talking. No movement even from Angie who just stared at the Lord. Your anxiety crept up even faster now, did you say something wrong?

"..WELL!" Angie suddenly jumping up bringing her wooden hand onto your pant leg pulling you forward- with such strength for such a small doll. "Come on" she tugged again annoyed like a child would if their toy was taken from them

"Give me attention!" Smiling you followed her to the smaller table you've seen before- when you first entered you never knew why the Lady would want such a small table. Now with Angie you knew why. Sitting down infront of the doll you leaned forward awkwardly in the seat

"Thank you Lady Angie" smiling at the doll like child who held a cup of 'tea' flavored air towards you with a cackle and nod-unaware of the gaze on you both from the veiled women who underneath smiled slightly at the sight

After a couple moments of playing tea, Angie's attention was stolen from a butterfly getting up and chasing after it with a yell of- profanities which you could have only assumed she learned from the other Lords. Movement was heard behind you-aware of the other women you pretended not to hear as to not scare her off

A flower crowded your vision for a moment before you took it gently. Fingers grazing across the other women's gently-ignoring the way she flinched away almost like you burned her somehow "thank you Lady Beneviento" you replayed glancing over at the veiled women who moved to sit beside you-almost so still you would has mistaken her for a statue-if not for her breathing hitching softly as a smile crossed your face. You didn't want to scare her off as she finally started to relax around you, slightly but enough

Holding the flower you looked down admiring it with a soft smile- which if you remember correctly Bela-during her studies-called it a Calla lilies. Whatever it was, it was a beautiful flower. While looking at the flower you failed to notice the one who gave it to you watched intently. Almost like she was flustered- but it was hard to talk with her veil to anyone. Anyone but Angie-who giggled behind you. Ditching the Butterfly for the scene before her. It was not only surprising that Lady Beneviento gave it to you but it also confused you as to why. Twirling it in your fingers gently you glanced up to the black veiled women "Thank you Lady Beneviento" smiling before remembering you already thanking the women-you grew slightly embarrassed from the lack of response-unsurpising as it was.

Laughing that scratchy tone-almost like a disk being scratched you drew your attention to the doll clinging to your pant leg once more "oohh~" Angie started in a tease "Donna thinks your pretty~ I can see it I guess" Angie giggled pulling at your pants for attention-if it weren't for what she said you'd compare her to Daniela for her need of almost constant attention

"What?" Was all the response you gave as the veiled women yet again stiffened in response-before abruptly standing up. Looking up at her smiling getting up as well. Angie curling herself around your leg like that of a cat against their scratching post, the Lady before you stopped almost as if debating something before turning and leaving hurriedly. A groan was heard as Angie unwrapped herself from you and chased after Lady Beneviento'

"Aww why can't we keep them?" Was all that you heard before they left the room. A smile grazed your face at the comment. It wouldn't be all that bad to be a maid for the two Ladies. You looked at the flower in your hand unaware of the glowing yellow eyes watching with a knowing smile.

A loud call of your name rang through the building loudly- the same way it was usually used for a certain sister. Gulping the lump down you straightened your outfit as best you could to be at least somewhat presentable, the flower safely in the pocket of your front shirt poking out.

Rushing down the hallway hastily while making sure not to make it seem like your running. Getting to the lady of the castle while running from one of her daughters? Yeah not that fun. The memory of the incident where you did accidentally set one of then off thinking you were trying to run away. Rubbing the scar on your wrist shivering at the thought.

Yeah. Not again.

Rounding the corner to the front of the manor your Lady and Lady Beneviento stood almost like they were waiting for something, or someone. A loud snicker brought your attention to Angie who stated up at you, bowing your head at them respectfully-thankfully remember the first rule anyone would know

Rule 1- don't look at any of the Lord's until they gave you some sort of signal(you technically broke it? But they either didnt care or mind)

Lady Dimitrescu placed a single hand on your shoulder sending a tingle of fright and anticipation through you "I will be giving you my own head maid, Donna dear" she started nodding in your direction giving you a odd smile-almost knowing? Of something "to help around your home" with that decided-it was clear she would not be changing her mind. Not that you'd want her to either

"Oo! We get the pretty lady?" Angie giggled loudly making her run around you in circles chanting something along the lines of "Pretty!" And "tea partner" smiling softly at her, Beneviento tensed up in embarrassment at the thought of you in her home. But accepted none the less

Calling out your name as you all got ready to finally leave. You turned to your former Lord "Now" she started giving you a stern look "be on your best behavior. Treat her right." Placing a hand on your arm her nails slowly turning to claws before turning back to normal. Like a warning

Entering Beneviento's home you noted how.. homie it really was. Like a normal house minus the dolls around. Some on shelves others on random chests or just sprawled on the floor.

Smiling like a little kid on Christmas you let a small "woah" as you glanced around the Lady of the house watching you intently as you neared one of her dolls, a defensive one who attacked if an unknown/violent person enters in her home on instinct without her command. Nibbling her lip nervously under her veil she hoped you would grow uninterested in the doll.

She was wrong

"This is so cool!" You escalated getting way to close for everyone in the room. The other dolls stared worry surrounding them from their Mothers nerves being shot. The doll sprung to life-a sharp intake from Beneviento, Angie moved to get you away, She slammed her eye shut. Awaiting the scream of pain to come out. The blood. But nothing came. Slowly she opened to see what could only be a silent but swift kill.

Her mouth opened in shock. You held the doll gently in your hands-it didn't even try to harm you just stared curiously at you, "I'm assuming you made this as well m'lady?" With a tilt of your head you sent a smile her way. Shock and disbelief was all she felt-even Angie was stumped about this.

"W.." for the first time since she first learned to talk. Angie was at a lose for words. "Well of course you dummy!" She just as quickly regained her ability. With a nod of your head you placed the doll where it leapt from gently smoothing out its outfit and you moved back. Hands on your hips before turning to face the two once again

"Well I think its cute!" The dolls around the surrounding area chattered excitedly, their mother stood yet again stumped. They obviously liked you-and she had no idea what to do about it.

She ignored the giggle of Angie who stared at her knowingly.

That started your new routine.

Everyday you woke up, changed. Accompany Angie around to clean as she entertained(teased) you. Everynow and again one of the Dollmakers dolls that are capable of walking yet have no speak or full will of their own like Angie would pop up and just stare at you. Or follow you. But if you looked at then they'd run off

So that made you have another rule.

Rule 2- if one of her dolls pop up don't look at them depending on who they are, and if you see them politely smile and wave. Do not engage unless they do.

It seemed like almost everyone in the house liked you to some extent. Almost everyone. You knew the Lady Beneviento at least somewhat liked you even during the small times of seeing her.

Yet during the last couple of weeks you barely saw the Lady of the house herself. Just at breakfast through Dinner. When you bring the food in she brought the tea. She refused to let you make it- Angie said something about how that's her favorite thing(and only thing) she cooked. All the other times you assumed she had little to no interest in you.

That all changed when one day you drew her attention to you even more then you unknownly had.

While cutting the bread you glanced up watching Angie as she ran around the small room, in awe about how life like she was, even after the amount of times you've seen it and heard it- she acted like a child- it was heartwarming but it was still a surprise. "Fuck" you hissed moving your hand away from the knife, in your obviousness you accidentally cut your thumb. Some specks of blood. Looking up from the deafening silence Angie was frozen in the middle of the room staring at you mouth agape. As usual you imagined if she was truly alive you wondered if she'd outright laugh

Which she did. And to your horror mimicked you

"Fuck" Angie copied gleefully. 'Oh no' was all you could think of as you rushed to her "FUCK!!" She yelled out louder then the last

"No no Lady Angie please" you attempted to calm her. What if Lady Beneviento heard? Would she be mad? Or find this funny? You were almost scared to find out "don't say that word please" at that she froze before slowly turning her attention to you

If this was anyone else. Like for example the daughters you served at your time in the Dimitrescu castle you'd be dead right about now. That's when it finally settled in. You just gave an order. To one of the lords. And if not the most unpredictable one at that considering how out of the ordinary she is. They all were in their own sense but Angie is arguably a very very unpredictable doll. If you weren't already worried out of your mind, you are now

"Um-" you started before she floated close to your face frozen. It was a couple minutes. Long painful silence. If it weren't for this situation that was happening admiring the work done on the doll would have been something you would have been doing

"Fuck" she giggled making a deep sigh of breath you held in this moment. "Hehe~" laughing that weird laugh of hers rushing off leaving you alone in the living room. Around dolls that seemed to pierce daggers into you much harsher then usual. Like Donna knew what you just taught Angie that. Like she saw

But.. she couldn't have. She's in the basement.. right?

That night Angie still said the word and laughed like the 9 year old? You guessed? She was, but never said it infront of her mom. Thank god for that. But.. that didn't last long either

"Motherfucker" was the first thing you heard leaving your room. Looking at the small doll in question who just giggled at your shocked expression "you are a motherfucker" before rushing off laughing

"WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT?" you yelled after Angie who in turn laughed even harder in horror you tried to wrap your mind around it. Did you say that? No. You're 50% sure you didn't say that word yet. At least not here

Standing in the hallway for a moment. Someone was behind you watching frozen not at you telling but at the young dolls profanity. Turning around you saw the one person you hoped wouldn't see or HEAR anything.

"L-Lady Beneviento!" You exclaimed bowing your head down harshly, "sorry about that I don't know where she heard that from" hoping to Mother Miranda she wasn't mad.

Silence.

A ear piercing silence surrounded you both in the hallway before the sound of a chuckle-then a deep soft laugh escaped the veiled women in front of you. Bringing her hand under her veil to probably whip away tears she probably had escape from how hard she laughed. Standing in shock at the scene infront of you-growing flustered before a smile crept on your face.

You could only hope you'd hear that lovely sound again.

"...thank you" a hoarse voice so soft you had to hold your breath to hear it clearly. It was even more apparent that she hardly spoke to anyone if it was that hoarse. But it was still the most beautiful sound you've ever heard. A smile crept up your face as your heart swelled in happiness. "Donna." She interpreted your thoughts making you blink in confusion

"Call me Donna"

After a couple of months you and the two Ladies of the house got closer. Angie followed you around like a duck yelling profanities or teasing you about your crush on her mom- that she somehow figured out. Just like now.

"Donna and Y/N sitting in a tree" Angie sang, dancing around the coffee table. Donna sitting next to you drinking a cup of tea under her veil "K-I-S-S-I-N-G" Angie spoke making the veiled women spit the tea out onto the table and the surrounding area.

"ANGIE" You yelled flustered but chuckling at the exaggerated reaction from Donna who was frantically whipping the spilled tea off of herself. Leaning over with a napkin you helped a bit

Silence filled the room when Angie ran out laughing the only slight of sound was the tick from the clock which sat above the door to the living room. Tapping the table you glanced at the time, realizing what the time was you jumped up catching Donna off guard

"Oh! Donna I have to see the Duke" you spoke looking away unaware of frozen panicked state. You hadn't left the house since the day you moved in, so you weren't aware of the jar, unaware of the village's state. Unaware of everything. With a gulp behind the veil the one thing that mostly plagued her mind.

What if you left?

What if you saw what she helped do and left her? Forever?

She couldn't deal with another lose- especially not you. Looking back you smiled at her gently, grabbing her hands gently rubbing the too with the palm of your thumb "I'll be back. I promise. I won't ever leave you or Angie, Donna I swear it"

Taking a deep shaky breath Donna nodded her head. "Alright. Just... don't be gone too long ok?" Donna begged-Hopeing it wouldn't seem too desperate- if it was you'd never comment on it.

"Of course" you promised.

The trip to the Duke wasn't easy nor was it too hard, bumps and bruises here and there. But in the end it will be worth it.

"Ah, the young helper from Lady Beneviento's correct?" The Duke spoke allowed rolling out of no where- you'd never figure out how he could do that. Or how the single horse could pull such a big guy either. A large grin appeared on your face

"Duke! Hey what's up?" Going over towards his shop you looked around a bit "it's been a bit quiet hasn't it?" The Duke froze turning towards you looking as you gushed over some of his items. A smile suddenly came onto his face

"Ah yes" he cleared his throat "I believe their planning on some..celebration of some sort for the Lords. And Mother Miranda of course" he concluded

"Ah, that makes sense!" Before you would say anything else something caught your attention. A single flower. A rose. If you could remember from the many books-and studies with Angie it means "Love" pointing to the rose "I would like to buy that one please" you spoke the Duke following your gaze and smiled softly

"Ah, a beautiful rose for a beautiful lord, my dear. Perfect choice" pulling out a couple more then just the single you assumed he'd pick he held them out to you gently, before you could pull your coin pouch out he held a hand to stop. "It's on the house, dear. You don't owe me anything"

"Oh! Well.. thank you Duke" smiling you took the Rose's gently in your hand turning and rushing off, rubbing the scar on your wrist in nervousness. The Duke watched in silence- he could only hope you'd stay safe looking back in his shop at the three statues he concluded- life isn't that fair nor kind to anyone.

Holding the flowers tightly so you wouldn't drop them yet gently so it wouldn't break, you smiled gently, today is the day, you were finally going to tell Donna how you felt. How much she meant to you.

Rushing up the trail to the house you couldn't help but shiver, a slightly unnerving shiver-almost cold. Obviously worried about the whole confessing thing. With a rub of your wrist you gulped deeply, biting your lip slightly-Donna would never cast you away for how you felt-she wasn't like that...

Right?

The closer you got to the door as it came into view, the more worried you became, walking around the sprawled out dolls around you took a deep breath and opened the door

"Donna. Angie I'm back!" You called out

Silence

Nothing came back. No quick pitter patter from the wooded feet of Angie sprinting towards you. Gulping down the lump in your throat you clutched the flowers a bit tighter still being mindful of how much strength you put in it.

The doll room! That must be were they are, walking around the couch you started down the hall before you froze everything happened in slow motion. The flowers falling, the white red speaks appearing in your eyes.

"No..."

The scream that pierced out of your throat in horror. Anguish and grief. The bloodied body of Donna laid on the floor Angie beside her. Blood pooled around them, it was obviously Donna's and by the looks of it- it stopped pouring out. Dropping to your knees with a heavy thonk-you ignored the pain in then. The static in your ears as blood rushed from your face. Bringing Donna's head onto your lap. You shook her gently

"Donna" you started tears rushing down harsh against your cheeks-all you saw was the blurrier vison of the women you loved "wake up" you begged shaking her yet again. Trying desperately to ignore the painfully obvious dull in her eye as her veil moved slightly, before you on instinct moved it to cover her whole face.

"Don't leave me" sobbing harshly you brought her closer as you shook. "I" gulping down the sob from your horse throat "I love you, please don't leave me alone"

"Please. Come back"

All you got was silence

Then another scream

#donna beneviento x reader #donna x reader #donna beneviento #resident evil #also the ending Ethan is behind you #ethan aha what are you doing behind me with that knife-reader #HAHAHA #everyone is dead no ones happy minus Ethan and his jar baby limbs #i wrote a fuck ton #i was going to make you Heisenbergs maid but idk how the fuck to write him #so i may do another one but that route??#i had like plots for that hehe #also. is castle the same as a manor????#idk #ima say it is lol #also i had to take stuff out because it got to long and tumblr was being pissy about it #so during the timeskip where she tells you to call her by her first name- you and her get closer you introduce her to a thing called TV and #angie won't stop watching pinocchio and has a wooden cigarette thing #donna gets upset about it so Angie fakes puffs smoke into her face #she gets time outs everytime #also you don't actually ever see her face. even at the end of the fic you wanted to give her that much #you know what i mean?#donnas last thoughts were how glad you weren't there that day. she wanted you to live happy #even without her-she would be happy #she only regretted not telling you how she truly felt #hehe.

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heloisedaphnebrightmore · 4 years ago

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Like a dream pt. 1|2 [Sirius Black x Reader] - Challenge

Title: Like a dream pt. 1 ➔ Like a dream pt. 2 - Here! Pairing: Sirius Black x Female!Reader Word count: 3.4k Published: 20 January 2021 Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore Notes: Important note at the end Summary: Sirius and you were supposed to be enemies, but your crush on him might not be as unrequited as you thought. Challenge: [x] [x] This is part of @sleep-i-ness writing challenge on tumblr. I used the below dialogue

“Can I kiss you?” “I don’t know, can you?”

Bingo: [x] This is part of my Make me feel Bingo Card by @girl-next-door-writes on tumblr

Square filled: Enemies to lovers

Harry Potter Characters Masterlist | Masterlists

Make me feel Bingo Masterlist

If you enjoy my stories, please consider donating and supporting me on Ko-fi. Of course, it’s completely your choice, I will continue updating for free anyway :) Thank you <3

You always disliked Sirius Black. Or at least that’s what you told everyone who dared to comment on your constant bickering and picking on one another. But you couldn’t deceive yourself. You caught yourself gazing at the boy from afar, hands getting clammy around him, air stuck in your lungs.

You felt your face heat up around him, making your crush on the boy dangerously obvious. You tried to conceal it with muggle makeup and useful charms you learnt from your friends and so far, it has been helping, but your nervous state couldn’t be fixed, even if you tried to count from one to ten, even if you tried to think of awful thoughts. The boy had effects on you that no one else had.

Your families having an amazing relationship didn’t help in keeping a distance either. So, when your mother announced the Blacks visit, you almost forgot to breathe for a mere second. You rushed up to your room, dressing up into your prettiest dress, putting on just a small amount of make-up, before taking care of the mess on top of your head that others called hair.

It barely took an hour or so before you heard your parents greeting the Blacks downstairs. You took a deep breath and wore the coldest expression you could possibly manage. You knew Sirius would have a couple of snarky comments spiced up with his usually cocky grin, one that always took your breath away, so you composed yourself and prepared for the worst.

Walking down the stairs felt even more difficult as your legs slightly wobbled. When you caught sight of him, even the air stuck in your lungs, your throat dried out. You wanted to scream into outer space, scolding yourself for being affected by someone who never really had a kind word to say to you. Although he never really offended you either. You just mutually got on each others’ nerves.

“Darling, finally, come on down,” your mother ushered you over to them as she saw you heading down the stairs.

You smiled sweetly as you greeted Walburga and Orion, before you turned to Regulus, but when your eyes met Sirius, words didn’t seem to want to leave your lips. He wore his usual cocky smile as he studied your face, seemingly unbothered about the lack of greeting.

“Cat got your tongue?” he asked, snickering as his parents followed yours into the dining room with Regulus behind them.

“You wish, Black,” you scoffed, but deep down you wanted to run into a wall. You were not one to be silent, one without words, but Sirius’ presence often caused you a momentary brain damage.

“Actually, I don’t. It would get boring,” he shrugged casually. You tilted your head in confusion, brows furrowed.

“You can’t possibly tell me you wouldn’t be happy if I couldn’t talk,” you raised a brow curiously.

“So, I’d have to listen to my own voice at all times? I’d love it. For a short period of time, of course. But for any longer, please, even I’d go mental,” he pulled a face, making you giggle. It wasn’t a sound you often let yourself have when Sirius was around. You didn’t necessarily hate each other, but none of you really had a nice word to say to the other, which often led to a bickering session.

“And we certainly wouldn’t want that,” you added sarcastically with a cheeky grin across your face.

“Are you going to join us today?” Regulus arrived from the dining room, waving his hand to follow him.

You joined your families at the table, quickly diving into the food, trying to avoid any awkward conversation. As you looked up at Sirius, his cold expression and blank eyes reminded you of the rumours you heard about his relationship with his family. He was distant and almost robotic.

“Darling, how’s school been?” Walburga turned to you with a sweet, but very clearly phony expression.

“It’s been going well, thank you for asking. I’m certainly not going to be a potions master, but I’m doing rather well in all my other classes,” you replied with a genuine smile, feeling proud of your achievements.

“That’s wonderful, dear,” she smiled as she turned to your mother. “You have got a beautiful and very intelligent child on your hand, love. You must be very proud of her,” she added. Your mom quickly tapped her lips with a napkin, ready to answer.

“Indeed. She is making us very proud,” she replied as she turned to you and offered you a loving, happy smile. “But I’m sure you are just as proud. You have two amazing sons who I hear seem to do quite well in school and part of the quidditch team of their houses as well,” she added, the information you have shared with her finally becoming useful.

“Regulus is indeed doing very well. Top grades of his year and it seems he will soon be captain of the quidditch team,” she added with a proud smile, but then the conversation turned into an awkward silence as Walburga decided not to mention Sirius. As you looked at the boy, he was wearing the same cold expression, slightly more annoyed than before as he rolled his eyes.

You wanted to tell him to ignore his mother’s mean behaviour, but you didn’t have the right to. You didn’t know much about their relationship and you certainly didn’t have a friendship of any kind with Sirius.

Instead, you heaved a deep sigh, swallowed hard and concentrated back on your meal.

The dinner didn’t last long, soon you found yourself in the living room, sipping on a cup of tea, your parents having an utterly boring conversation with the Blacks.

“Mom, would you please excuse me?” you asked as you placed your cup and saucer on the table in front of you.

“Of course, darling, go ahead,” she smiled and continued her conversation with Walburga.

You stood up from your seat and looked over at Sirius who seemed even more miserable than you. It was clearly painted across his face that he didn’t want to be there, let alone listen to the conversation your parents were having.

“Mrs. Black, would you mind if I stole Sirius for a second?” you asked. The woman looked at her son, slight disappointment across her face, but then she nodded reluctantly.

“Not at all, sweetheart,” she shook her head. Sirius looked at you with a frown across his face as he stood and followed you out of the house, straight to the garden.

“Why would you do that?” he asked, furrowing his brows.

“You couldn’t look any more miserable sitting there,” you shrugged.

“Thanks,” he scoffed as he took a seat on a bench beside the wall. You sat down next to him, a slightly awkward silence distancing the two of you as you kept your eyes busy, looking around the carefully planted flowers your mother felt so proud of.

“You know, this is not the Black I’m used to,” you added as you grew tired of the silence.

“Why, what did you expect?” he tilted his head backwards, looking up at the darkness, stars lighting up the sky.

“I don’t really know. In school you are cocky, unpredictable and not to mention annoying at all times,” you scoffed as you remembered how many times you wanted to wrap your fingers around his neck and squeeze it, just a little. “But here you are like this sample boy. Quiet and well behaved, but most of all cold,” he grimaced at your words, which you weren’t sure how to take at first.

“My parents hate me, how else am I supposed to behave? I don’t plan to fuel the fire any more than it already is,” he replied with a serious expression.

“Well, I know my words don’t mean much, but if it’s worth even a bit, I prefer the Sirius I go to school with,” you shrugged casually, trying not to reveal your crush on him, but still trying to be honest. When Sirius started smiling, you couldn’t stop yourself from mirroring his expression.

“Huh, so you don’t hate me that much after all,” he snickered proudly, his usually cocky smirk painted across his face once again.

“I never hated you. I just can’t stand you,” you added as you turned away from the boy, trying to hide your blushing cheeks.

He leaned forward, attempting to catch a glimpse of your face, but you carefully looked anywhere except him. “Then why are you blushing?” he chuckled as your head shot up, looking straight into his grey eyes that seemed even darker under the moonlight. He must have understood your confusion. “Your ears are bright red,” he added with a cheeky wink.

You groaned, feeling annoyed both because of your own obvious behaviour and his impeccable sight. “I’m just feeling warm,” you tried to save the situation which earned you a sceptical look from Sirius before it quickly turned into a barking laughter.

“I’m sure that’s true. Especially because there are goosebumps all over your arm,” he chuckled as he bit into his lower lip, your eyes immediately focusing on his movement. You scolded yourself inside for your silly behaviour and folded your arms in front of your chest as you turned away from the boy, quietly sulking.

He took off his suit jacket and placed it on your back, his scent finding its way into your nostrils almost immediately. It was warm and soft, and it smelled like him. You looked at the boy with a questioningly raised brow, not knowing how to take it.

“What? I can’t possibly have a beautiful lady freezing to death beside me,” he shrugged nonchalantly with a mischievous smile playing in the corner of his mouth.

“Beautiful lady?” you asked, scepticism clear in your tone. “When in the last 5 minutes did I become a beautiful lady?” you snorted in disbelief, ignoring how un-ladylike it was.

“You have always been beautiful,” he added casually as if the words were more familiar to him than to you. You frowned at his unusual behaviour, complimenting each other was not something you often or ever did.

“Are you sick? Are you under some kind of a potion? Blink twice if you are,” you nagged him, causing a silent laughter to erupt from his lungs.

“I’m perfectly fine. You know, just because people don’t say something out loud, it doesn’t mean they don’t think it,” he said.

“Okay- thanks, I guess,” you tried to find the right words to say.

“Not a problem,” he smiled proudly.

Once again, an awkward silence fell on the pair of you, but this time you couldn’t possibly break it. His unusual behaviour made you feel wary and you weren’t sure what would be the best way to strike up a conversation.

“Did I make you feel awkward?” he asked, his eyes focused on the dark sky and the small little stars painted across it.

“I wouldn’t say you made me feel awkward, but I certainly didn’t expect any positive comment from you,” you shrugged casually, trying to play it cool. Your heart was pulsing loudly in your ears, your throat dried out, but you couldn’t have given even a hint of the effects he had on you.

“Hey, I’m not that bad,” he groaned.

“I’m not saying you are, but we are always bickering about some silly thing that I can’t even remember because it’s always so meaningless, so for you to say that I’m beautiful, it was certainly unexpected,” you explained.

“Well, I can’t possibly tell you how pretty you are in the middle of our little arguments.”

“Actually, you could,” you snickered, which made him chuckle as he watched your playful expression.

“Now that you mention it, if I used it before, you might have shut up quicker,” he snorted as he saw your face turn into an expression that clearly screamed how badly you wanted to hex him.

“You are going too far, Black,” you added.

“Isn’t that what we usually do?” he asked wriggling his brows, making you chuckle.

“What was that creepy move?” you asked, trying to silence your laughter.

“My signature move,” he winked. “Girls, love it.”

“Sure, if you want to scare them away,” you huffed, but you couldn’t remove the smile from your face.

“We could have done this sooner, you know,” he stated, making you feel confused.

“What do you mean?” you asked.

“Have a normal conversation without you getting mad at me?” he grinned.

“I wouldn’t get mad at you if you didn’t behave like a complete idiot,” you shrugged, your smile still hiding in the corner of your lips.

“Fair enough,” he chuckled. “But then how else would I catch my crush’s attention?” he raised a questioning brow. For a second you thought you heard it wrong, for a second you thought you were hallucinating. His words seemed too unreal.

“You what?” you attempted to word your confusion.

“How else did you expect me to get your attention?” he chuckled playfully, his own words making him feel lighter.

“Why would you want to catch my attention?” you asked dumbfounded.

“Have you even heard what I said?'' he laughed watching the confused expression across your face. “I will help you out. I just said I wanted to catch my crush’s attention. My crush would be you. Do you need any further explanation?” he chuckled playfully as your face grew even more confused. As if your brain was unable to process his words. Even your own brain couldn’t believe what he said. But your heart, your heart was beating dangerously as the words left his mouth as if they needed no further explanation.

“You like me?” you asked, clearly needing more to go on.

“I have fancied you since forever,” he smiled as he scooted closer to you on the bench. “I wasn’t sure if you liked me, you always got mad at me. But then sometimes you gave me these mixed signals and I couldn’t place it anywhere,” he shook his head scoffing. “Up until I overheard Lily’s conversation with James, and it felt like hope,” he raised a questioning brow, waiting for you to put the puzzles together, but you remained silent.

He turned his complete torso towards you, watching your profile as he tucked a loose hair behind your ear. You felt your face heat up, but you didn’t turn away. You knew you were exposed, but you still didn’t know how to react. You looked at the boy, his grey eyes eagerly waiting for you to say something.

“What do you want me to say?” you asked. “You already know, don’t you?” you turned away as you heaved a deep sigh.

“I just overheard a conversation, that means nothing,” he shook his head, disputing. “Look at me, please,” he asked as he gently got hold of your jaw and turned you back. “Do you like me?” he asked, wasting no time.

You wanted to say no, you still couldn’t believe his words. Your constant bickering has been ongoing for so long, that it just didn’t make sense. But then something had changed in you too. You didn’t know when you started having feelings for him, but it just happened. However, accepting your own feelings seemed more reasonable than his.

“I’m being honest. I do like you. I have for quite a while,” his eyes didn’t lie. He looked at you with a warm, loving expression and although it was hard to believe his words, his gaze couldn’t have lied.

You let out a deep breath as you composed yourself, preparing for the worst. Maybe it was a prank, and he was going to laugh, maybe he was just joking with your feelings, maybe he made a silly bet with someone. You didn’t know what to expect, but every possible negative outcome went through your head ringing an alarm.

You looked down at your lap, playing with your hands nervously. “I do like you,” you whispered, your tone uncertain and barely audible. You collected all the bravery you could find within you and looked up at him. A gentle, warm smile spread across his face as he lifted one of your hands and cupped it in his, warming up your cold skin. His genuine expression reassured you with a simple look at him. The whole boy seemed so happy, he couldn’t have played the part that well. It felt unreal, as if a dream of yours came true, but you couldn’t possibly feel happier.

“So, if I ask you to go out with me, would I get a yes?” he asked as his smile grew wider.

“I guess, you would have to ask me first,” you chuckled, making him huff playfully.

“Okay, so, would you like to go out with me?” he asked confidently and for a second you left him hanging, as if you were debating your options.

“I guess that could be arranged,” you replied which made him shake his head as he pulled you into a hug, his arms wrapped around your shoulders, his face hidden in your neck. As he pulled away, he stopped a few inches away from your face, his eyes wandering between your eyes and lips, his intentions screaming obviousness.

“I- Can I kiss you?” he asked, the unusual uncertainty in his voice making you braver this time.

“I don’t know, can you?” you asked back, clearly catching him off guard. But soon his surprised expression turned into a cheeky grin.

“Well, I could,” he smirked, but didn’t move.

“Then I guess the question is, will you?” you added playfully, trying to guide him to the right direction, hoping for him to finally make that last step.

“Would you like me to?” he played along, but this time you started losing your patience.

“For Merlin’s sake, just kiss me already!” you instructed him, huffing, both of you laughing silently, before he placed his hands on each side of your neck and pulled you closer to him, attaching his lips to yours finally.

As if you have been waiting forever, it felt like pure satisfaction, warm, happy and safe. Sirius felt like a safe place that you didn’t know you needed, but now that you were there, you couldn’t even think of ever letting go. You fit into each other’s embrace so perfectly, it felt like a dream.

…

Your body was sweating, your head was spinning as you slowly opened your eyes. A wet towel was carefully placed on your forehead which fell down into your lap as you slowly pushed yourself up into a seated position.

As you looked around you recognised the hospital wing of Hogwarts, the metal frame of the bed creaking as you moved around. You pulled the cover off your body and placed your feet on the cold floor, hissing at the uncomfortable feeling. But before you could have gotten out of bed, the door opened, and a blonde-haired girl walked into the infirmary, reading a newspaper.

“Marlene?” you asked. She looked up from her book and gave you a confused look.

“What are you doing? Madam Pomfrey said you should rest. You got hit pretty badly,” she added as she sat down beside you.

“What are you talking about?” you frowned in confusion.

“You got hit by a bludger and passed out. Do you not remember?” you shook your head in a reply.

“And what about Sirius?” you asked, clinging onto the only recent memory you could remember.

“What are you talking about? You hate Sirius,” she furrowed her brows as she watched your face fall.

You felt like you couldn’t breathe, like you have been kicked in the gut and kneed in the chest. Air didn’t seem to want to leave or enter your body as you finally understood that it was all a dream. A wishful thinking that you knew too well would never happen. There was no way Sirius would ever look at you that way and to realise it after you woke up from a dream that quite possibly felt like the best thing that happened to you in awhile, it was heart-breaking.

“I do,” you replied as you tried to hold back the tears that threatened to roll down your cheeks and reveal your well-hidden secret. You felt so stupid, so naive for thinking about having a shot at the coolest boy of the school, but most of all, you hated yourself for having such a vivid dream. A dream that you knew will always remain only a dream.

Notes 2: If you enjoyed reading this little piece, please don’t forget to leave a like, comment and/or reblog. Your opinion matters and gives us motivation. Thank you ^^

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386 notes · View notes

atinydise · 4 years ago

Text

Ateez reacting to their s/o packing and leaving

❦ Genre: Angst

❦ Pairing: OT8.

❦ Word count: 4k4.

HONGJOONG

“It’s okay sweetie! We know and understand how busy Hongjoong is.” Comforted your mom. “But he promised he would be here today.” You sighed disappointed. “I know my son and for sure he has something important to do.” Added Hongjoong’s mom, washing the plates. You only smiled shyly and dried the plates again. Tonight, your boyfriend and you were supposed to eat with your parents and his. You wanted everyone to get along. Family is important for you. And Hongjoong’s knew it. Or at least that’s what you thought. Just when everyone left, you sat back on the table. The apartment was remaining calm. Would it stay this quiet for all the next times you would need to wait for your boyfriend? It is something that you want. All these questions popped one by one in your head. To erase it, you took your phone and looked at your notifications. Nothing from Hongjoong. This lack of information made you so mad. He didn’t even text you to apologize or to warn of his absence. Following the rage burning in your heart, you rushed to your bedroom. You picked the suitcase which was behind the door and throw it on the bed. Furiously, you opened the dresser and grabbed few clothes. Not caring about the weather or the look. When you slammed the cupboard, you heard footsteps coming to you. He was back home.

“Y/N, I know I messed up once again, but Eden needed me and-” He glanced at the luggage. “What are you doing?” “I’m leaving.” “Wait wait.” He grabbed your hands. “Why are you leaving? And where are you going?” “I don’t know yet. But I’m sick of waiting for you every fucking day.” You grabbed the case by the handle and left the room, bumping into your boyfriend’s shoulder. “Y/N wait, you can’t leave like this! I won’t do it again okay. I promised.” He begged, trying to take away the luggage. “You promised this, 17 times already.” You claimed. “I’m done.” “This time is going to be different! Do you want me to plan another family diner? Tomorrow?” He insisted, blocking the door. “Kim Hongjoong, we are done.” You stated, tear sliding on your face. “We both know that nothing is going to change. You are so focused on your job that you forgot to have time for you. You are missing everything.” “And do you think leaving is the best option?” “Yes otherwise, I ask you to choose me or your job.” At this dilemma, Hongjoong knew already what he was going to choose. Just when his mind was dozing off, you grabbed the luggage back. You put the first sneakers you found and opened the door. “I’ll take the rest of my stuff soon.” You said before slamming the door. Hongjoong was staring at the door dumbly, hoping that you would come back, saying that it was a joke. But you never came back.

SEONGHWA

You came back from your shower, towel wrapped around your hair. “The bathroom is free Seonghwa.” You let him know. “Thank you.” “Is there something you want to eat tonight?” “I have no idea.” “Really? We didn’t go to the supermarket for nothing.” You giggled. “Just choose whatever you want to eat. I don’t care.” He claimed coldly, walking past to you. Just before he could enter the bathroom, you caught his wrist, making him look at you. “What is your problem with me?” Seonghwa sighed, already bothered by your question. “Are you going to be this annoying again?” “I wouldn’t be if you weren’t acting like a jerk these months.” “Yes whatever…” he replied, looking at you arrogantly. “If you are not happy, it’s the same for me.” He removed your grip off his wrist and entered the room. You couldn’t believe what just happened. He was so cold, so rude, mean and careless with you since these 2 past months. You tried to see what you could do to help him to relax but he was always pushing you away. “I don’t even know why I bother staying there with you!” You yelled when you heard the shower. Furiously, you looked for your sport bag. “I’m done living with you like this Park Seonghwa.” You claimed louder. You needed to pack and leave as fast as possible. Even if it was too radical, that’s what you needed. “Did you finish the shampoo? I can’t-” Seonghwa paused when he saw you packing your belongings. “Find it.” Without even replying to him, you zipped your bag and grabbed the hoodie on the bed. “Y/N, what are you doing?” “Are you blind?” You asked sarcastically. “I’m leaving. You don’t care anyway.” You rolled your eyes. “You have nowhere to go. Don’t do this. It’s stupid.” Not giving a damn about him, you tied your hair, put your jacket and shoes on. “Y/N,” he called you again, holding his towel around his waist. “This is truly stupid.” “The only stupid thing is to stay with you and get hurt over and over again.” You faced him. “Okay, I’m sorry.” He apologized. “I don’t want your fake ass apology.” You looked at him angrily. “I’ll ask the boys to bring the rest of my stuff soon.” You said, trying to fit few more clothes on the little sport bag. Looking at you grab the last things you needed, Seonghwa was regretting his behavior towards you. He took you for granted and was sure you would stay with him no matter how asshole he is. “You better not come with them.” You warned him, before leaving. “Y/N.” He tried one last time to change your mind, but the slamming door was is only response. In the hallway, you walked slowly, trying to see if he was going to run after you. But seems like his mind was probably clear as yours.

YUNHO

You buried your cold hands on your trench pockets. It was so cold outside that you could turn into an ice cube in few minutes. Even if the air was freezing all of your body, you were more comfortable here than at your apartment. Why? Because of your boyfriend, Yunho, who was passing his nerves on you. His acting career started for a year now and he acted in so much webtoons while promoting with Ateez at the same time. You were always telling him to slow down and to not accept every contract, but he wanted to please everyone. This past month, he was very exhausted. Even if he was trying to deny it, you could see it clearly in his attitude or just by looking at the dark circles under his eyes. When you advised Yunho to rest or just to take a nap, he went immediately mad. “You can’t understand me”, “you can’t know when you are an actor”, “stop babying me” he was saying most of the time. You exhaled when you stepped in front of the entrance door. You knew that when you will push the door, Yunho would be there, asking you to leave him alone or to make less noise. It feels like constantly walking on eggs with him. Were you supposed to feel so stressed in a relationship? Of course, no.

So, what if…?

You grabbed the knob and hesitated to open it. Taking a deep breath, you entered the hallway and rushed to the dressing room, not caring about Yunho glancing at you from the other living-room. Not controlling your moves anymore, you selected few clothes and stacked up on Yunho’s suitcase. The one he was taking for his world tour. “Can you do a bit less noise; I need to focus.” He said. You wiped the tear on your cheek and acted nothing happened. “Sure, don’t worry, I won’t make noise anymore.” “Good, thanks.” He smiled. “And what are you doing by the way?” “Leaving.” Your voice cracked at the sudden realization of your actions. “Leaving? Where? You should have told me!” “And how I’m supposed to do that when I can’t even talk to you?” You sobbed, grabbing another sport bag tightly. “How I’m supposed to live with you? Can’t you see how stressed I am when I need to talk to you?” You asked, your lips shaking uncontrollably. “I feel awful next to you. I feel like a shit. Being not enough good for you. It hurts Yunho.” “Y/N, calm down please.” He said gently, holding you by the shoulders. “I acted like a jerk with you. I’m sorry.” “You are sorry? That’s all? After making me feel this way… you are only sorry?” You ran your hands through your hairs, messing your locks a bit. You were getting crazy because of him. “We love each other. We can solve this.” “I don’t want to. I’m not even sure to love you right now.” You confessed. Yunho was so surprised by your words that he didn’t make a move when you walked next to him with the luggage and the sport bag. For him, it felt like a sledgehammer. A nightmare. But for you, it was worse than that. You were conscious about the real situation. It was a living hell.

YEOSANG

You argued with Yeosang 2 weeks ago. It probably has been one of the worst argue you ever had. It all started because he was late again for your cinema date. You were upset, but you understood the situation well. His career took most of his time and you knew it when you accepted to date him. But everything went worse when he didn’t even apologize for making you wait. For some people this wouldn’t be a big deal, but for you, it needed at least a little “sorry” when you waited 2 hours outside. Yeosang straightly went annoyed by your behavior. “Don’t act like this, it’s not the first time I’m late.” “It’s not because I’m used to it that you shouldn’t be polite anymore.” “Chaeryoung, would never act this way with me.” He rolled his eyes. And there started the argue. Everyone was looking at you in the theater’s hall. It was clearly “who would yell the loudest and win this argument”. Angrily, your boyfriend enumerated why leaving his ex was not the best choice he made. Feeling sad and mad, you left the theater and completely disappeared. When Yeosang went back to the apartment the same night and didn’t see you, he started to freak out. You never answered to his calls, your phone wasn’t even ringing, and you were nowhere to be found. Finally, after 2 weeks, you entered your apartment. Yeosang rushed there, clearly relieved to see that you were doing fine. “Where you have been? I looked for you everywhere! Even the boys!” He claimed, pissed and worried in the same time. Completely ignoring him, you went straight to the bathroom, picking all of your products. You grabbed the suitcase in the hallway and messily threw all of your stuff there. “What are you doing? Are you leaving again?” A big silence as a reply again. Bumping into his shoulder angrily, you went in the living room. “Y/N.” You picked all the frame with both of you on it. “What the fuck are you doing?” He yelled, not understanding a bit of your intentions. “I’m throwing everything related to you.” You replied, opening the trash to throw all the frames. “Are you crazy?” He tried to stop you. “Yes! Crazy for loving someone rude and hurtful as you!” You pushed his hands of you. “Do you think leaving is a good idea? I’m sorry about what I said okay? I was just mad, tired and-” “I don’t care.” You sighed. Yeosang was speechless. He was regretting this whole argument and never wanted to hurt you this way. Once again, you bumped into him to leave the room. 10 minutes later, he was looking at you, still picking your clothes one by one. He wanted to say so many things, but it felt like a terrible idea. Without saying anything, you closed the case and went back to the hallway. “Y/N, please think about this well. I know you are very sad and mad, but this is the wrong choice.” He gently said, trying to persuade you once again. You took a deep breath and opened the door. “Oh Y/N, you are back!” Said Wooyoung, surprised to see you here. You didn’t reply to him too. Erasing Yeosang of your life meant that you needed to erase all of them too. You simply left, leaving both of them looking at you sadly and confused. “Where is she going?” “Far away from me.” Replied Yeosang.

SAN

San was nice. Even too much. A normal guy would understand that it’s not a good idea to bring his ex-girlfriend at the dorm. Especially when his current girlfriend was living there too. “San she can’t stay there.” You said, washing the rest of the plates. “Why? She has nowhere to stay! Her boyfriend ditched her.” He explained. “She can’t stay outside the whole night.” “She has a ton of friends; one of them will gently accept her in.” “It’s too late.” He tried to change your mind again. Annoyed, you turned off the water and dried your hands. “I said no San.” “Don’t be so heartless! At least for a night.” “I know you.” You sighed. “You are the type to say, ‘only today’, but let people live with you for the rest of your life.” “I’m just being nice.” “And you are just being blind. She clearly using you or trying to get you back.” “I don’t care I can’t let her alone at night.” He said, finishing the conversation. San went back to her, sitting at the opposite side of the couch. You kept glancing at the scene. She was smiling widely at him. It looked so fake. “So, can I stay here?” She asked, using his nicest and cutest voice. “Yes sure. I won’t let you sleep in the street.” “So, he really decided to choose her then? Okay.” You whispered, none of them hearing you except Jongho eating in the kitchen. “Huh... Y/N is upset.” “No... Y/N is done.” You rectified, throwing furiously the towel on the counter. Passing the living-room to go in San’s room, you opened the wardrobe. You saw all your clothes hanging there and which confirmed you that it was a good idea. Trying to be quiet as possible, you grabbed a suitcase, not caring who it belongs to, and set your clothes there. San knocked gently at the door, knowing that you were upset. When he opened it, he would never imagine seeing you packing your stuff. It almost gave him a stroke. “Hey hey hey! He pushed the luggage far away from you, probably knocking on the wall. “What are you doing?” “If she stays here, then I leave.” You looked straight at his eyes. “Y/N stop this. I can’t put one of you out and I don’t want that.” “Then bye.” You replied. “Stop being so jealous! It’s just for a night!” He tried to lock the door. “This is not just for a night. It’s not the first time you chose her instead of me.” You started. “Remember my graduation ceremony? No, you can’t because you were with her.” “I said that I was sorry. She just called me crying and-” “And you played the white knight for her once again. Every damn time San.” You bit your lip, trying to not say something you would regret. “You care more about her than you care about me.” “This is not true.” “Then tell her to leave.” San didn’t move a bit; you could see the hesitation in his eyes. “See. You can’t lose her, but you can lose me.” You pinched your lips together and looked at the ceiling to suppress the tears. You slowly walked to the luggage and close it carefully. San was muttering some words, but you didn’t even listen to him. In a matter of time, you unlocked the door and bowed to him one last time. “Hope you will be happy with her. But she would never love you as I do.” This was the last thing you thought that you would do today. It seemed so unreal. This morning you woke up in your boyfriend’s arms and now you needed to book a hotel room. Love is unfair.

MINGI

“How did you both met?” Asked nicely the girl in front of Mingi. “Ah come on, it’s not even funny.” You giggled, embarrassed. “Oh please!” She pouted. “Aye okay okay!” Shouted Mingi, visibly too tipsy. You tried to shush him, but he removed your hand. “Be funny at least one time in your life Y/N!” He said, tugging on your side. “Y/N is the funniest girl we know, what are you saying Mingi!” “Funny? Y/N?” He laughed. “No!” You were smiling at the group, but it was all forced. His words hurt you a bit. “Well okay okay!” He stopped the debate with his friends.” She’s funnier than pretty then!” His friends stared at you, quietly apologizing for their friend. “Why are you sorry? She knows I dated her because she’s nice! If I was looking for someone pretty, I would have dated Hyelin.” He pointed at his friend. “Stop staying nonsense.” She hit him under the table. “You are going to hurt Y/N.” “No, it’s okay.” You reassured her. “But I need to use the restroom, I drank too much water.” “Do you want me to go with you?” Asked Hyejin, making sure you were okay. “Stop babying her! She’s a grown girl.” You nodded and stood up, discreetly picking your leather jacket and bag without them noticing. But the boy sitting next to you, spotted you. “Did she… take her stuff?” “It’s probably cold in the restroom.” Laughed Mingi. Your boyfriend was unaware you were clearly going back home. You went in the 1st taxi you saw.

When you stepped in the dorm, you straightly went to Mingi and Yunho’s room. Because of the tears in your eyes, you couldn’t spot your belongings well. You were messily throwing everything on a bag, not caring if it was yours or not.

When you decided that you took everything you needed, you left the room. Before closing the door, you looked one last time at your favorite place in the world. It could be stupid, but you had so much memories here.

Wiping your eyes, you turned off the light and exited the room and the dorm. Your heart was beating so fast. You were not sure if it was the right idea but tonight, you felt so humiliated and ashamed that you only had one thought: leaving. “Hey Y/N!” Giggled Mingi, exiting the taxi. “Why you left? It was a fun night!” You ignored him and took his seat in the taxi. “Hey! Where are you going?” Asked Mingi, slowly understanding that something was wrong. “It’s late.” “Can you ride me to Itaewon… or anywhere you want. I don’t know yet.” You asked the driver. “Are you sure everything’s okay? Because your boyfriend looks completely lost.” He pointed at Mingi, face glued to the window. You glanced at him. He was visibly worried and confused. His hands were trying to open the door car, but because of the lock, he failed. “He’s not my boyfriend. And I don’t know him.” You replied. You ordered the taxi driver to leave. When you slowly realizing what you did, you busted in tears pathetically in the taxi, face buried behind your hands. “Are you sure it’s what you want?” Asked the taxi driver, sad for you. No, you weren’t sure. But it’s the only thing you thought at the moment.

WOOYOUNG

“Wooyouung,” you whined before plopping next to him on the couch. You wrapped your arms around his waist, trying to enjoy the warmness of his body. “What’s happening love?” He asked, his eyes glued on his phone. “I can’t come with all of us at MAMA, this year.” You sighed. “My brother will finally have his surgery for his knee the same day. So, I need to go.” You buried your face in his neck. It was a big award ceremony so you wanted to be there for them, but your brother would need you. “He can’t reschedule the operation?” You raised a brow, sitting up correctly. “He waited for this surgery for almost 6 months. He won’t reschedule it.” “I’m sure if you ask and tell him why, he will accept.” Smiled Wooyoung. “I won’t do that.” You replied. “He wants to play football again. 6 months without touching a ball was already hard for him.” “But going to MAMA without you is going to be hard for me.” “I think you can survive. You are a grown man.” You replied annoyed. “Don’t make a big deal of this. Just tell him you can’t go.” He kind of ordered you. “And he’s not even a pro player anyway.” Outraged and disgusted by how your boyfriend was heartless and selfish, you stood up from his laps. “Did you notice how selfish you are right now?” You asked, hands on your hips. “Selfish? Sorry for wanting you so bad with me at MAMA.” He rolled his eyes. “But this is my brother Wooyoung.” You raised your voice. “Okay fine! Then go with him! I don’t even care to be honest.” He claimed before going to the bathroom. You stayed there completely frustrated. He was so selfish now. He already took a big head in 2 years. “Then if you don’t care,” you whispered. You walked to the laundry room and grabbed the clothes you put there this morning. Just after that you rushed to Wooyoung’s room, losing few clothes on the way, but screw it. 15 minutes later, Wooyoung came out of the bathroom and almost slipped on your croc top. “The hell.” He grunted before heading to his room. “Y/N, don’t let your clothes everywhere. Seonghwa will be mad.” “Oh, thank you, I was looking for this one.” You said, throwing the piece of clothes on the bag. “What is this bag for?” “I’m going back home, and I won’t come back here for a selfish guy as you.” You resumed. “Are you serious?” He scoffed. “I’ve never been this serious in my entire life.” “Just for this little argument?” “I accepted us to live together because I was in love with you and your personality. But right now, you are clearly not the same guy I used to know.” You said disappointed. “But you don’t even care, right?” You repeated. He was thinking about the right words to say that he was sorry, but even if he did, at this point, you wouldn’t even believe him. “Call me when you are the Wooyoung I fell in love with.” You said, before slamming the door of his room.

JONGHO

“Do you want to go shopping with me tomorrow?” You asked your boyfriend. “Shopping? We can’t do that Y/N. People will see us.” He declined. You sighed again. “You can wear a hat and a mask.” “Y/N.” He called you seriously. “We can’t do that.” “We can’t do anything anyway.” You added angrily. “I’m sorry. You know that I want to hang out freely with you.” “But your career is more important.” You finished. “Not more. Just stricter.” He rectified. “Why strict? The manager said that it was okay.” “Yes, but I’m scared about ATINYs. A dating scandal have heavy repercussion on a group.” “That’s why I said that it’s more important than me.” “Just wait a bit longer.” He held your hand. You rolled your eyes; he didn’t seem to get that you were already waiting for 4 years now. In these past years, you spent most of your dates in the dorm, curtains closed. You were always looking at him flirting or acting like he was single and little by little, it started to make you insecure. “What if I don’t want to wait?” You asked, removing your hand from his. “What do you mean?” “I’m done waiting for you to be ready. All of your members are okay with our relationship. The staff too and even the CEO.” You counted on your fingers. “I’m starting to believe that you are the only one not wanting to take this relationship seriously.” “Don’t say that. This is not true.” “You just can’t see it yet.” Your lips started to shake without your consent. You tried to bite your lip to keep your composure. “I refuse to stay in this type of relationship any longer.” You got up from the bed and grabbed the little suitcase you brought here the first time he invited you to stay more than a night. “Don’t tell me you think about leaving.” He sat up. “That’s exactly what I was thinking about. I won’t wait 10 more years.” You picked all the clothes you had. Jongho was removing them instantly, but you didn’t give up. As fast as you could, you tried to pack so he couldn’t see the few thin tears sliding on your face. Jongho was shouting and begging you to stay here. These screams worsened the situation. Hongjoong and Seonghwa came to see what was happening, completely worried. “What’s happening Jongho?” Asked the eldest member, concerned. “Y/N is leaving because we can’t officialize our relation yet.” He resumed, wiping aggressively his tears. “Don’t let her pack the rest of her stuff Hyungs. She can’t leave like this. She can’t leave me.” They both noticed that you didn’t say a word yet. You were packing the rest of the clothes which were on the floor. “Jongho, I don’t think we should do that.” Started the leader. “Y/N is grown enough to make her own decision. And it’s not good for her to wait for you.” Right when you stood up, making understand that you were done with the packing, Jongho blocked the door with his arms. Seonghwa and Hongjoong had no choice but to hold him the time you exit the room. “Let her leave Jongho.” Said Seonghwa, trying to not cry because of his friend. “You both can’t be happy this way.” Added Hongjoong. “It’s just for a little amount of time Y/N!” He begged, busting in tears when you walked past to him to leave. You knew nothing will change. That’s why you took the decision to leave. You would never ask him to leave or ruin his career for you. You would feel too bad. Even if you are probably going to regret it in the next few minutes, it was the good choice for you and for your health.

#ateez reactions #ateez reaction #ateez scenarios #ateez scenario #ateez angst #ateez #ateez kpop #ateez sad #ateez x atiny #ateez x you #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez imagine #ateez writing #ateez writings #kpop #kpop scenarios #ateez ot8

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poutyyybangtan · 4 years ago

Text

ready or not - j.jk

genre: friends to lovers, enemy to lovers, (almost a slow burn?), a mix of everything lol character pairing: jeon jungkook 9bts) x female oc warnings: not really any lol just angsty fluff kinda stuff word count: 5.4k (it’s alot) authors note: i wrote this months ago and it’s not finished but i can finish it if yall want? let me know :)

______

(prompts from @im-here-to-help-you-all-write)

“i think the longer you look at it, the worse it gets.” “yeah, kinda like your face.”

“i need your help.” “holy shit, i never thought i’d hear you say that.’ “please don’t rub it in right now.”

“i don’t feel like i’m ready for this yet” “you’re going to have to be, because we’re out of time.”

you can’t believe you actually had to do this. the last person you ever wanted to look at was your only shot at getting out of the situation you brought upon yourself. you had originally counted on one of your other friends to help you out, but of course, life never seemed to work out the way you wanted it to.

“jin, please. can’t you just cancel and come with me?” you begged, watching as your older companion continued to chop away at some vegetables.

“you know i would love to help bamboozle your family with my impeccable acting skills, but unfortunately, i do have a business to run. this weekend is a big deal for the restaurant and joon would kill me if i left him alone to handle such a thing. and besides, we all know joon can’t toast bread without having to call the fire department first,” jin laughs. you laugh softly, knowing jin had a point. poor namjoon had amazing business skills, but unfortunately that means he lacks in the cooking department.

“i guess you’re right,” you mumble begrudgingly.

“why not ask jimin if he can go?” jin asks, sliding the chopped vegetables into a pot.

“my mom knows him, she’ll know something isn’t right. and besides, he and hobi are going to a dance camp for school,” you shrug.

“and tae? yoongi?” jin asks.

“he’s got that test retake for his photography class and yoongs has an audition for an entertainment company in gangnam,” you sigh. you’re really proud of all your friends and the successes they have, but you really wished they could’ve helped you in your time of need. but you couldn’t be that selfish, so maybe you had to admit defeat.

“you know, you could just ask jungkook,” jin asks nonchalantly.

“you know i can’t do that,” you answer bluntly, refusing to even entertain the idea.

“i mean, you could,” jin laughs, putting the lid on the pot and onto the stove top, turning to you afterwards.

“jin, you know i can’t. he is the last person on earth i would ask to help me. i would rather die of embarrassment than to ask him for his help,” you dramatically claim.

“you just might if you don’t ask. besides, what's the big deal? it’s only for a weekend,” jin shrugs.

“yeah, a whole weekend of him pretending to be my boyfriend. jin, we can barely tolerate each other as is, having us cooped up together and pretending like we actually like each other is a whole other ball game,” you said.

“well, here’s the way i look at it. either you tell your mother that you don’t have a boyfriend and face embarrassment at your mother's wedding, or you can suck it up, ask jungkook nicely to do you this one favor, and have fun this weekend. you never know, jungkook might actually be up for it,” jin says, an underlying suggestive tone in his voice; one that you never caught.

you had to admit, jin was right. as painful as it was, jungkook was your only chance at escaping this nightmarish weekend.

you found jungkook in his usual zone of comfort: with his lips attached to some random girl he probably barely knew. you found yourself scrunching your face in distaste. such a vulgar display in a library no less. you huffed off your second doubts and approached the table with confidence. you noticed that neither party acknowledged your presence, so you knocked on the table to gain their attention. reluctantly, the girl pulled away first to throw you a bitter look.

“jeon, can we talk?” you say softly, not trying to cause a disturbance.

“i’m kind of busy, can’t it wait?” jungkook asks, a smug look on his face, the girl sat next to him donned a complacent smile on hers.

“please, i saw you making out with some bimbo blonde yesterday, i’m sure you can find some other toy to play with when we’re done,” you smirk, watching the look on the girls face fall with every passing word that escaped your lips. she glanced over at jungkook with disgust before grabbing her belongings and walking away in a fit.

“great, well there goes my whole afternoon,” jungkook scoffs. he leans into his chair, folding his arms over his chest.

“you’ll deal. look, i need your help,” you admit, much to your dismay.

“holy shit, i never thought i’d hear you say that,” jungkook laughs ironically.

“please don’t rub it in right now,” you groan.

“how can i offer my service to you?” jungkook smirks, looking up at your obviously irritated figure.

“i need... i can’t believe i’m saying this. i need you to be my boyfriend for the weekend,” you spit out.

“you what?” jungkook asks incredulously. you don’t blame him for his confusion. what you were asking was heinous, add to the fact that you two barely tolerated each other? it was the biggest taboo situation you could’ve put yourself in. but you were desperate.

your mother, as loving as she was, was relentless. she just wanted the best for you. you were about to graduate college soon, about to get a real career and be a real adult. and to her, that meant start a family as soon as possible. and that couldn’t happen without being in a relationship first. and what better way than to hook your daughter up at a gathering for family friends? cause nothing says love like a wedding, right?

“what’s in it for me?” jungkook asks. you looked at him in disbelief.

“wait, you’re actually considering it?” you asked.

“well, you gave me a proposition, so why not?” jungkook asks.

“uh, because we’re not necessarily friends? it’s not like you owe me anything to even consider the idea,” you chuckle.

“you might not be my friend, but that doesn’t mean i’m not yours,” jungkook shrugs, finally standing up and collecting his scattered books. you hadn’t actually noticed them before, you just thought that the library was a good place for jungkook to hook up, not an actual study zone.

“well, uh, what do you have in mind?” you asked, answering his question finally.

“i need a date for this work thing, and my usual hookups aren't going to cut it. they’re not exactly what you would say… modest?” jungkook jokes, causing you to laugh a little bit.

“sound like a deal?” jungkook asks after a moment of silence passes. you pretend to consider his proposition, as if you actually had a choice. you look up at him and you can see that he saw that too.

“what kind of work thing?”

“where are you going?” jimin asks, watching you step out of your bedroom clad in a cocktail dress. you really would’ve rather been at your shared apartment, cuddled up next to jimin and tae watching some horror film eating greasy food, but alas, you had to uphold your end of the bargain.

“remember i told you that in order for jungkook to uphold his end, i have to uphold mine? apparently, he works at some magazine company and they’re having a company gathering to celebrate the issue's 90th anniversary and he needed me to come with,” you groan, strapping on your heels.

“you’re going all out for this,” taehyung comments, a teasing tone hidden in his words. you looked up and glared at him, knowing what he meant.

“if i put forth 100%, maybe he will too,” you say.

“oh, he most definitely will be putting in 100% effort,” jimin says, low enough for only taehyung to hear which makes him giggle. you look up and see jimin smirking at you which makes you groan internally.

suddenly, the doorbell rings and you thank whatever being there is that saves you from the conversation that was happening, with or without your participation. you pull the door open and the first thing you see is jungkook, properly dressed head to toe. you notice the bow tie pressed snuggly against his neck, not a wrinkle in his suit jacket or his dress shirt. his long hair was parted down the middle, brushed out out of his eye. you hated to admit it, but he looked breathtakingly beautiful.

“wow,” jungkook finally says, eyeing you in a way that made the blood pool in your cheeks.

“uh, yeah. let’s- let’s go,” you murmur, noticing the boys in the living room giggling at your guys’ interaction. you shove him in his chest. he grabs your hands and laughs, pulling you out the door.

“what did i miss?” jungkook asks. you roll your eyes, noticing the way jungkook held onto your hand, even after you got further and further away from your apartment, but not minding the warmth his hand provided against your cold one.

“trust me, nothing you want to hear, and nothing i’m willing to repeat,” you scoff.

jungkook was right. he had warned you beforehand that everyone at his job was stuck up and snobbish and would continuously point out that fact that you were no model. and like he had forewarned, all you heard all night was “you’re too pretty not to be a model” or “jungkook ended up with you?” you were appalled, sure, but you didn’t take their words to heart. you don’t know these people, and after tonight, you’re never going to see them again.

but jungkook flinched every time someone opened their mouth. he felt bad for you, but when he saw you delicately handle the situation, he knew you would be fine. still, it didn’t make him feel any less bad.

“we can leave whenever you want, you know?” jungkook whispers into your ear. you look up at him and smile.

“sounds like you’re using me as an excuse to ditch this snooze fest,” you giggle. jungkook smiles back down at you and laughs with you.

“busted,” he finally says.

“thank god, let’s ditch these runway wannabes and get some pizza. i’m starved,” you groan, looking away, missing the endearing glance he tosses your way. you both ditch the stuffy building, and headed to a late night pizza shop down the corner. you sigh in relief once you step into the restaurant, inhaling the smell of cheese and dough. you both decide to seat yourselves in a booth in the corner of the dining area. once you both place your orders, you settle into a comfortable silence.

“so, what caused you to conjure up this boyfriend lie?” jungkook asked after awhile.

“my mom thinks that i need to be in a relationship to be happy since i’m getting ready to enter the real world,” you sigh, rolling your eyes and leaning into your elbows that rested on the table.

“thats stupid,” jungkook scoffs, leaning into the booth. you were caught off guard by this, expecting jungkook to somewhat agree with your mother.

“you look surprised,” he says, gauging your reaction.

“i kind of am. not gonna lie, i was expecting you to agree with her,” you say, shrugging. the waiter brings your slices and leaves you two alone, settling back into the conversation.

“no way. if you want to be single, you should. i’m sure you’re single by choice anyways,” jungkook says, picking up his pizza and taking a huge bite of it.

“what do you mean?” you ask him, slightly confused behind the intentions of his sentence.

“i just mean that you’re insanely smart, funny and talented. and you’re extremely beautiful. if you wanted any guy, you could have him,” jungkook shrugs, munching on his pizza in peace. meanwhile, his statement sent you into a frenzy. who knew jeon jungkook thought so highly of you. you were under the impression that he dispised your entire being. he never really complimented you before, so his statement shocked you.

“never knew you thought so highly of me,” you said, smiling to yourself. you can’t really explain it and you don’t know why, but knowing how jungkook truly felt about you made you extremely happy.

“there’s a lot you don’t now about me,” he winks, causing you to roll your eyes and eat your pizza. and yet again, you missed the way jungkook smiled at you, enjoying your presence more than he would care to admit to.

“i don’t feel like i’m ready for this yet,” you murmur, feeling your hands start to shake as you stood outside the venue.

“you’re going to have to be, because we’re out of time,” jungkook smiles, taking hold of your hand and waltzing you two into the building. your mom had asked you to come early for a surprise so you decided to give her a surprise of your own.

“jungkook, maybe we should say you caught food poisoning and we had to leave,” you murmured as jungkook continued to drag you further and further into the building. jungkook smiled at your child-like nature and shook his head.

“we’ve come too far to give up now. let’s just rock this and get home,” he says, smiling at you. you felt a sudden urge of confidence that surges through you and gives you enough momentum to swing open the doors of the chapel hall. you were taken aback by the way the chairs are decorated with white pieces, hanging off the backs. you take notice of the pale yellow and white combo that you didn’t think would match so well. you felt happy for your mom and that she met someone who loved her so much that they were willing to do this for her to cherish the day.

“it’s beautiful,” you gape, admiring all the minute details your mother probably agonized over. jungkook admired the astonished look on your face as you practically ignored his presence to take in your surroundings. he always found you beautiful, but watching you be you while nobody was looking was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. jungkook had the biggest crush on you for as long as he could remember. and he refused to even fathom the thought of confessing to you when he knew how you felt. he knew you couldn’t stand his lifestyle, his choices that he’s made regrettably. but how else was he supposed to cope with the fact with the one person he’s allowed to steal his heart hates him.

“ah, there you are,” a voice says from behind you two. you both turn around and you see your mom, hair curlers and full glam.

“hi mama,” you smile, running up to her and giving her a big hug.

“hi sweet pea,” your mama coos, swaying you both back and forth. you pull back and look behind you to see jeon smiling at the interaction. this made your heart jump for a split second before you returned back to your surroundings.

“ma, this is my boyfriend, jeon jungkook,” you smile.

“oh my, you’re so handsome,” your mother gushes, rushing up to him and pulling him into a hug.

“thank you,” jungkook smiles, blushing slightly. you’ve never seen jeon blush before and to see him in a such a fragile state made you happy. and you couldn’t seem to figure out why. your mom finally released jeon from her clutches and she turned back to you.

“hun, i’ve got a surprise for you. follow me,” she says, grabbing yours and jeon’s hands dragging you to what you assumed was the dressing room. there were two dresses that were covered hanging off of a clothing rack. your mom shoves you guys onto a couch and rushes over to the dresses.

“one of these beauties will be yours to wear for the wedding because… hon, will you be my maid of honor?” your mother asks, eyes full of stars that made your heart swell. you felt the air leave your lungs and your heart begin to race. you remember watching your mom struggle with love all her life, her face in a frown always. you’ve never seen your mom so happy now, and you would do anything just to see her happy.

“ma, are you serious?” you ask, wanting to be sure this is what she really wanted.

“of course baby,” she smiles. you jump up and hug her tightly, muttering a yes into her hair. you both squeal with delight, jumping in place like teenage girls. suddenly, another pair of arms are wrapped around you, chest pressed against your back. you managed to look up and see jungkook bouncing with you and your mom.

“i wanted to join too,” jungkook says, his voice high pitched and filled with excitement which in response, made you giggle. you all finally stop bouncing and jungkook pulls you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you, catching you off guard. you felt your heart race and you swore his heartbeat matched yours. you brushed it off as it being the sudden activity you all had just endured.

“i’ll leave you two alone so you can try the dresses,” your mother says after she catches her breath, winking at you.

“you’re just gonna let your daughter get undressed in front of her boyfriend alone?” you ask incredulously.

“hon, he’s your boyfriend. i’m sure he’s seen more,” she giggles, exiting the room, leaving you with your jaw wide open.

“can you believe this?” you ask, shocked at your mothers bold statement.

“i’ve always wondered where you get your vulgarity from,” jungkook teases, his chest causing a vibration that you felt in your back, reminding you of your close, read as nonexistent, proximity. you push yourself away and whip around to face him, catching a glimpse of him trying to fight the smile that tried its best to take place on his delicate features.

“i’m not vulgar and you’re not watching me change. however, i do need an opinion on the dresses, so i guess you can stay,” you say, walking past him to try on the dresses. you snatch both of them of the rack and head into the bathroom, changing into dress number one.

at first you thought it was a joke, the frills and exotic colors making your eyes hurt from how loud it was. you tried it on anyway, and you couldn’t believe how ridiculous you looked. no way your mother was being serious when she picked this dress out. you unlocked the bathroom door and stopped your way to where jungkook was sitting on the couch, playing on his phone. you clear your throat to capture his attention and you nearly explode with the laughter with the way his eyes widen and face drops.

“what do you think?” you ask him, twirling around in the godforsaken dress you know your mother probably bought as a joke.

“i think the longer you look at it, the worse it gets,” jungkook says, a dumbfounded look on his face. you withhold your laughter and stare at him in distaste.

“yeah like your face,” you scoff, playing with the dress as if you actually admired it.

“are you gonna wear that?” he asks, secretly hoping you’d say no so he could release a breathe he didn’t know he was holding.

“well, i like it, don’t you?” you say, continuing to pretend like you actually were considering wearing this deafening dress.

“uh.. if you like it then… sure,” jungkook says, shifting in his seat. you admired the fact that he was trying to cater to your feelings and for some reason it made your heart race at the thought. you don’t know whats been going on with you lately but every kind gesture has made your heart race with excitement. you didn’t know when it happened, but you started looking at jungkook as more and it scared you. you couldn’t be with him. you knew that. jungkook had a reputation, and he was proud of it. he was proud of the amount of women he could pull in one night. hell, in one hour. he was used to the idea that feelings were a concept he wasn’t willing to understand or try out. and you had to accept that.

“i’m messing with you gukkie. my mom probably bought this as a gag, the real dress is still in its cover,” you say laughing at jungkooks face that was contorted into one of discomfort. you leave him to relish in your teasing as you retreat back to the bathroom to change into the actual dress. you could still hear jungkook laugh to himself as you unzipped the dress to change into the other one. little did you know, he was laughing to himself about the nickname you gave him. he’s never had a nickname he actually enjoyed before. he was still lost in the thought of you calling him gukkie forever when you finally exited the bathroom.

he always thought those scenes in cheesy rom-com teen films where the guy is staring at the girl like she’s the only one that matters was cliche. but he was wrong. so very wrong. watching you in the tight floor length pale yellow dress that just made you glow knocked all the air out of his lungs. you’re hair that was in a messy ponytail allowed some pieces of hair to frame your face as you continued to fumble with the dress.

“it’s a little longer than i thought, but it fits well, yeah?” you say, still looking down at the gown. you honestly felt ridiculous. you rarely dress up like this. you hid your body underneath baggy clothing so to have something so tightly pressed against your body made you severely insecure. the silence coming from jungkook made everything worse. you looked up to see jungkook leaning forward, elbows resting on his thighs, hands holding his head up. there was a look in his eye you had never seen before and it made your stomach churn with excitement.

“that bad huh?” you joke, hoping to ease some of the tension that was building in the room. jungkook stands to his feet and approaches you, his body so close to yours you could feel the heat radiating off of his body.

“you look beautiful,” jungkook says, smiling down at you. you feel yourself blush and begin to fumble with your fingers, a nervous tic jungkook found absolutely adorable. jungkook was helplessly in love with you, this much he knew. from the way you laughed, to the way you rolled your eyes in his presence. he loved the way you gave yourself wholly to the ones you cared about, willing and able to do any and everything for the people you love. he loved the way you strived to work hard and how incredibly intelligent you were. and suddenly, his heart was full with all the love he was dying to give you, but know he never could. because you deserved much more than some player who was willing to sleep with anything with legs. but if he could at least pretend like the love between you two was real, even if for a short while, he’ll take it. as desperate as he was, he wanted to know what it felt like to have you love him back. even if he knew it was all pretend.

“jungkook, i can’t thank you enough for doing this. i know you would rather be in some girls bed trying to figure out a way to sneak out without her noticing, but i’m glad you’re here… with me,” you smile, hands gripping his bicep’s to keep him close. his cologne was hypnotizing, causing you to pull him closer and closer.

“there’s no place i would rather be,” jungkook said honestly, placing his hands onto your waist, allowing you to lean in.

“you don’t mean that,” you scoff, smiling and rolling your eyes, getting ready to pull yourself back from a dangerous territory. jungkook stops this from happening, wrapping his arm around you til your pressed flush against his body.

“you have no idea how bad i want you. all of you. mind, body and soul. but for right now, for the sake of our friendship and the momentum its growing, i will take you in whatever way you will allow me to have,” jungkooks says, forehead pressed against yours as he wills himself to hold back from pressing his lips against yours and taking you on the small couch in the dressing room. the words jungkook spoke so honestly made you shake from it’s intensity.

“jungkook i--”

“how’d the dress fit?” you mother asks, barging into the room. you and jungkook scramble apart from one another, him taking seat on the couch and you standing in front of him. you mother misses the way you two seemed highly unfocused and nervous as she coos over how adorable you look in the right dress.

“you need to finish getting your hair and makeup done, so scooch along so me and your beautiful boyfriend can get to know each other,” your mother says shoving you out of the room and directing you to where the other bridesmaids were getting their hair and makeup done. it wasn’t until you were sat in the chair that you realized.. your mother and jungkook were alone. oh boy.

you never felt so girly in your life. your hair was curled and put up in a half up half down situation, your makeup light and barely noticeable, but enough to tell you were wearing it. this wasn’t you, you didn’t like wearing makeup mainly because at the end of the day you forget to take it off and causes acne. you were working part time and went to school full time so you always left your hair in a ponytail or a bun. this look was new for you and you were kind of excited yet nervous for jungkook’s reaction.

you surprised yourself with the thought, not really caring about jungkook’s opinions before, but now it was all you could think of, and that scared you. you knew this was just a favor he was owing to you, but he was really going above and beyond and it warmed your heart. but you had to remind yourself that you were just friends, nothing more. hell, you were barely friends. had it not been for you incessant need to prove yourself to your mom, you two would’ve never even became cordial with one another.

you brush these thoughts aside, trying to manifest positive vibes for such a joyous occasion. you leave the dressing room, filled with chatter, in search of jungkook who may be suffering your mother’s constant conversation. you return back to the room you first were in when you arrived, catching your mother exiting the room.

“you didn’t scare him off, did you?” you tease, hugging your mom.

“honey, you look beautiful!,” your mom gushes, taking in the sight of her daughter. you smile and thank her, happy that she was happy.

“is he still in there?” you ask, nodding towards the door she came out of. she giggled and placed her hands on your shoulder.

“he is, and he is absolutely in love with you,” she smiles, causing you to furrow your eyebrows.

“what do you mean?” you ask, your heart starting to race.

“the way he talks about you, the way his eyes gleam with love with the mere thought of you. hunny, this man is undoubtedly in love with you,” she smiles. you couldn’t believe what you were hearing, there was no way that jeon jungkook, the university playboy, is in love with you. you two barely conversed without an argument taking place. you doubt he knew anything about you, despite you two running in the same circles. sure, you knew a lot about him, just because your friends talked about him a lot and it was hard not to listen to sometimes.

“you’re crazy ma. you need to finish getting ready, the weddings going to start soon,” you laugh, trying to brush off the conversation.

“jungkook is in there getting ready, one of robert’s groomsmen caught food poisoning so he’s gonna walk down the aisle with your cousin, sam,” she said, rushing off to get ready, leaving you no room to reply. this wasn’t what he signed up for and you felt bad, so you went into the room to check on him. you caught him standing in front of the vanity, trying to finish off his tie. you had seen jungkook dressed up before, but there was something different about this time. you felt something more for him, and honestly, you always have. but his reputation…

“looking sharp,” you smile, looking up at him. his eyes meet yours in the mirror and he smiles, and this time you see it. the love your mother was talking about.

“you look beautiful, as usual,” he says, his charm peeking through. you scoff at his comment, walking up to him. you seemed small compared to him, and it was kind of an odd sight for you. you leaned your head against his shoulder, just staring at him staring at you through the mirror.

“something on your mind?” he asks, noticing how lost in thought you were. you focus in on him and the surroundings around you.

“my ma said something interesting earlier that’s got me thinking is all,” you say, hoping he wouldn’t press the issue much further. you didn’t want to make the air awkward or uncomfortable by trying to involve feelings, but a big part of you want to know how he feels from his own lips.

“what did she say?” he asked, his nerves jumping. he didn’t say anything wrong did he? he tried to be as cordial and respectful as possible, wanting your mother to like him. if things were to happen in the future, he didn’t want to be on bad terms with your mother.

“she said… she said that you love me?” you murmur, you heart caught in your throat now that the truth was out there and you can’t take it back. jungkook froze, caught off guard by your confession. he wanted to play it off like it wasn’t true, that your mother was delusional. but he knew the truth. and he knew that you also knew it too. he wanted you. he’s always wanted you. and now, he’s presented with the opportunity to have you in any way he wants and he can’t make the move to move forward.

“is it true?” you ask, trying to get a clear and concise answer. you’re not sure what’s going to happen, regardless of what his answer is, but the anxiety of not knowing is starting to kill you. you shouldn’t be forcing him to confess, but now that it was out there in the air, you couldn’t take it back. maybe you should tell him?

“if you’re not comfortable talking about it it’s o--”

“i love you,” he blurts, interrupting you. you pick your head up off of his shoulder and now you’re standing side by side, staring at him through the vanity mirror. you’re frozen, unsure of what to do now. you didn’t actually think he was going to say it. you thought your mother was pulling your leg. but she didn’t know that you two weren’t actually a couple and maybe that’s why you had hoped what she said was true.

“did you hear me?” he asks, voice laced with nerves. he couldn’t even begin to explain the amount of fear and vulnerability he was feeling at the moment. he meant it. he loved you. but why should you believe him. he was a playboy, and though you may never understand his reasons as to why he tried so hard to escape you by sleeping with other people, he wanted nothing more for you to believe him now.

“i did,” you whisper, afraid that the sound of your beating heart was louder than the words you spoke. you wanted him, god you wanted him, but you were scared that his words were from false bravado. a heat of the moment feeling that was fleeting.

“i know you might not believe me, and you have every right not to. but i love you with my entire being and.. it’s scary,” he chuckles, trying to explain his emotions to the only person he’s ever been vulnerable with.

“and like i told you earlier, for the sake of us finally gaining friendship, i will play it to your pace and whenever you’re ready, let me know. because i’ll be here,” he smiles. he turns to you, leaning down and placing a gentle kiss to your cheek before walking out of the room, leaving you confused as to what the hell just happened.

_______

an: part two? let me know :)

#jeonjungkook #jeonjeongguk #jungkook scenarios #jeongguk #jungkook #bts scenarios #enemies to lovers #friends to lovers #slow burn #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #bts scenario #kpop scenarios #bangtan boys scenarios #kpop

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darthkruge · 4 years ago

Text

Bellamy Blake Imagine ~ Reunited

Summary: (request) You were dating Bellamy up in the Ark and haven’t seen each other since you got locked up. Now that you’re back on the ground, you finally reunite.

Words: 1820

Warnings: fluff, a bit of angst, some language

a/n: I absolutely loved writing this. Thank you so much for requesting! I hope this is something like what you had in mind <3

~ Italics symbolize flashbacks ~

You sigh as you wake up in your cell. Another fucking day of this torture. Looking at yourself in the mirror, you see the tear-stains on your cheeks and your matted hair. Ever since you got locked up all those months ago, you haven’t been sleeping. It was so fucking stupid. All you wanted was some extra medicine for your mother. She’d been sick for a while and the rations were spread too thin and she works so hard to help you, you thought you’d get away with it. But you tripped the alarm on your way out of med bay and the guards got to you before you even had a chance to say goodbye to her. Or him. Him.

Bellamy arrived at your door as you sat in the corner, reading one of the mythology stories he lent you. You immediately jumped up and ran into his arms. He chuckled, catching you against him as you wound your arms around each other.

“How was your shift?” You ask, knowing how hard he works as a guard.

“It was alright. I’m tired, though. They’ve been riding my ass lately, something about increasing security protocols. I don’t know.” He sighs, frustrated. You frown. You hate the pressure they put on him. You know he’s reliable and takes his job seriously, but that doesn’t mean they need to put all the responsibility on him.

He sees you upset and his gaze softens. He sighs gently. “I missed you, beautiful.”

Ever since you were locked away, you hoped one day he would show up at your cell. He hadn’t, but not for a lack of trying. You knew that he tried, every day to get to you, just to see you again and make sure you were okay. But the Ark had him on watch, afraid he would do something stupid like try and break you out. So they monitored him constantly. You were glad he at least had the sense to listen. The last thing you could bear is something happening to Bellamy.

“Holy shit, Y/N”

You gently bunched your fingers in the dress you were wearing. It was the only one you had and you weren’t used to wearing it. Nice clothing was such a luxury, you were amazed you had saved enough to even buy this semi-clean, hole-ridden one.

You looked down at yourself and fidgeted with your hands anxiously. “That bad?” You ask, cheeks heating up

“Oh, fuck, no! Babe, you look incredible. I mean, you always look incredible. But tonight you look really, really incredible.” Bellany was rambling. He hated that you didn’t see yourself the way he saw you and spent everyday helping you with your confidence.

You finally look up at him and smile, starting to believe his words. “Thank you, Bell” You whisper softly as he comes up next to you, gently grabbing your hands in his and pressing a gentle kiss to them.

The hoard of guards took you out of your thoughts. Okay, what the fuck is going on? You only saw one guard a day and he brought you food twice, that was it. There were never five guards at once, barreling toward each cell. They break through your door, running toward you and harshly grabbing your arms. You frantically look at them, hoping Bellamy is one of them, but quickly realize he isn’t.

“What the fuck? What are you doing? Where are you taking me?!” You yell frantically, flailing and kicking as they drag you out of your cell. What if they’re going to float me? They might be overpopulated and need to get rid of the juveniles in the SkyBox. It wouldn’t be too far of a reach. Oh shit, what if something happened to my mom? Is that why they’re taking me out??

Eventually they bring you to a strange-looking ladder, leading up to who knows where. They harshly push you up, as more and more prisoners are filing in behind you. Getting lost in the crowd, you have no choice but to climb up and find yourself on a ship. You are pushed toward an empty seat and sit down, instinctively strapping yourself in. You try and calm your breathing, having no idea what’s about to happen to you. Looking around, you recognize some of your old classmates and others who were in the Sky Box with you. It gives you a small piece of comfort that they all seem as confused as you are.

You’re jolted from your seat as the ship takes off and realize you’re falling. You hear whispers and realize that holy shit, they’re sending you to the ground.

You hit the ground less-than-graciously and look down at the bracelet those guards must have strapped on you when they pulled you from your cell. Still confused, you move to stand up, your legs still shaky and breathing uneven from the complete stress of the day. You think about your mother and Bellamy, the two most important people in your life who you will probably never see again. You feel the tears rising up and fight to keep them at bay. This is now about survival and you won’t make it if you spend every day living in the past.

You almost pass out when you hear that voice. “If the air’s toxic we’re all dead anyway,” Someone says. And that voice could only belong to him. It could only ever be Bellamy’s. But how the hell is this even possible? He’s not here, he wasn’t in the skybox. Fuck your brain for playing tricks on you. You know you’ve been thinking about him constantly, but a hallucination is just plain cruel.

The doors open and everyone runs outside. They yell and scream, breathing in the air as they discover they survived. You walk out, hoping the air will clear your head, but you’re still having trouble. Because it can’t be him. Right?

Regardless, you need to see for yourself. You hastily push through the crowd and your knees almost give out when you see him. Your hand goes up to your mouth, eyes filling with tears as the raw emotion of seeing the love of your life for the first time in months hits you. He catches your eye and his face pales. He blinks, unsure if you’re real.

You run to him faster than you’ve ever moved before. You don’t care if you’re pushing someone over. You don’t care if you take up all the oxygen in the world. You don’t care if you die in two minutes, so long as you can touch him one more time. You don’t care about anything else but him, him, him.

You collide with his chest and jump up, legs wrapping around his strong frame. You bury your face in his neck, hot tears sliding down your face. His hands are grabbing your arms, your back, your hair as he feels you and realizes you’re really here. You pull back and so does he, breathless smiles and tears running down both your faces. His arms are now under your thighs, supporting you.

“I thought I would never see you again” You whisper, crying harder.

“Princess, you could never get rid of me that easy” He whispers back, pulling you closer than you previously thought was humanly possible.

He gently sets you down and you collapse into his chest, your head spinning.

“Fuck, I missed you” You say.

“I missed you too. God, I missed you. I tried to get to you, I promise I tried. I’m so sorry. They took you away and I didn’t know and I tried. Every day, every night, every second I wasn’t with Octavia or my mother I was looking for you. Even when I was with them, you were always with me. I- I should have been faster, I should have protected you. Y/N, please, I’m so sorry.”

You shake your head quickly, “Bell, don’t blame yourself. Please, don’t do that to yourself. It was my choice to take that medicine, not yours. And I know you tried. Never for a second did I doubt you. And you were with me too. I couldn’t have made it through without keeping the hope alive that I would see you again. But then they took me and I thought I was going to die and I wasn’t going to say goodbye without telling you I loved you one more time.” Your voice breaks, the emotion overtaking you.

Bellamy’s heart shatters. He’s always hated seeing you cry, seeing the pain you’re going through. All he ever wanted to do was make it better. “Hey, hey, hey. Baby, it’s okay now. I’m here and you’re here and we’re okay. Y/N we're on Earth and we’re alive. That’s pretty fucking incredible”

“Leave it to us, huh?” You say, laughing gently.

He smiles and kisses you, deep and strong. Once again, the world fades and it’s just the two of you. You breathe into each other and pour everything into the kiss. All the feelings of doubt, pain, hurt, love, hope, happiness, and relief of the last months are desperately conveyed into this one, single embrace.

You pull away and look at him, worried.

He looks at you quizzically. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, God, nothing. I have everything I could possibly want. But it’s just hitting me. Bell, what are we going to do? We’re just a bunch of kids, criminals, on Earth. There’s no society, no rules, no food, no shelter, no water. How are we going to survive?” You say, brain scrambling at about a million thoughts a second.

He places his hands on your shoulders, comforting, but firm. Whenever you started to fall into an overthinking spiral, Bellamy grounded you.

“Hey, hey. Breathe with me. It will be okay. We’ll figure it out, it’s what we’ve always done. Y/N, you’re brilliant. I’m sure you’ll come up with wonderful ideas to help us. You always do. And we have survival instincts. It may not look like it now, but I believe in this group. We’re going to need each other to survive and I think they’ll realize that.”

You look at him, feeling slightly better. He always knows what to say to put your mind at ease. You smile, realizing that since you found each other you haven’t kept your hands off each other. Literally. Ever since you ran to him that one time, you’ve been touching. You look at his hands which have now traveled to your arms as he gently caresses them. You softly press your hands to his face, cupping his cheeks as you look at him.

“You are going to be a brilliant leader”

“And I will have the most amazing person in the world right next to me.”

“Obviously. I’m not letting you get all the glory, Blake.”

“I would expect nothing less, L/N.”

@sgarrett49

#bellamy blake #bellamy blake x reader #bellamy blake imagines #bellamy blake fluff #bellamy blake fanfic #bellamy blake fanfiction #bellamy blake angst #the 100 #the 100 imagines #the 100 x reader

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stonerz4sokka · 4 years ago

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i rlly like your analysis and interpretation of the characters!! what do you think is the correlation between katara's trauma with being put on the mother role and her relationship with sokka? because it's obvious none of them are the sole parental figure to each other, but for some reasom people seem to think sokka is always irresponsible while katara had to keep him from doing stupid stuff and being his ‘mom’ or whatever. do you think sokka only being able to picture his mom as through katara has to do more with how katara is the girl and what sokka imagines his mother would be in theory, more than the actual dynamic they have in practice?

thank you for the compliment!

short answer; yea you’re pretty much right. here’s the long answer though:

katara had her childhood stripped from her at such a young age and shouldered the domestic and emotional labor both in her home & within the gaang. she performs tasks like washing clothes, sewing sokka’s pants, even in s1ep1 she’s doing the chores while sokka is ‘playing warrior.’ it makes sense for her to do water related chores since... y’know... she’s a waterbender. she can wash clothes way faster than a nonbender like sokka would. but it’s clear that both sokka and katara throughout the show hold gender essentialist values. like when katara tells toph she’s not being ladylike or when she made fun of sokka for carrying a purse and wearing a ponytail. or even when sokka tells aang to not respond to ‘twinkle toes’ because it’s not manly. both sokka and katara grew up in the same environment, so they’ve both internalized these misogynistic beliefs, but since their respective genders are different, how it manifests in their actions differs as well.

it’s safe to say that mothers are more often than not the bearers of emotional and domestic labor, so sokka envisioning katara when trying to remember his mom is actually a reflection on how skewed his understanding of motherhood is, because he genuinely cannot remember his mom like katara does. mothers are more than the domestic and emotional labor they provide, but if you are a young boy who doesn’t remember his mom and holds the belief that women are the natural caretakers, if your sister does those tasks that your mom isn’t there to complete then it makes sense why she’s filled that void. but katara remembers kya, which is why she was so offended when toph said she acted like a mom. she knows the hole her mother’s death left is one she cannot and does not want to fill. katara doesn’t want to shoulder these responsibilities, but she never had a choice. it’s clear from the beginning when she and aang went penguin sledding that she’s just a young girl who wants to have fun.

just like katara was forced to take on more responsibility, so was sokka. going back to TBITIB, look at the precision in his warrior makeup application, how he kneeled at the edge of the village ready to fight knowing he would lose. he’s had a very real understanding of his own and his people’s mortality from a young age. not that katara doesn’t share any of this awareness, but she’s sokka’s little sister, which is a crucial aspect of their dynamic. sokka plays the role of the ‘wet blanket’ so katara can retain at least some of her innocence. even though he’s a boy who insists on fact and logic, he always follows katara down her impulsive paths because she’s his number one priority, period. he doesn’t care how irrational or selfish she’s being, he will always be there to protect her.

your point about people misinterpreting katara’s empathetic and bossy nature as motherhood boils down to three things: 1) a lack of understanding of what motherhood entails, 2) racism & misogyny and 3) lack of experience with youngest sisters OR are the youngest themselves and lack self-awareness. i am not a mother, so i cannot paint an accurate picture of what motherhood is. what i can say, as someone who loves my mom very much, is that if she acted like a 14 year old katara i would’ve died years ago. katara’s trauma forced her to assume certain responsibilities that the target audience of atla couldn’t understand, but that doesn’t mean she’s not a child. if you’ve ever spoken to a fourteen year old you know that one minute they could say something thoughtful & intriguing and the next say something incredibly stupid. she’s still growing as a person and she still deserves to be treated as a child even if her obligations aren’t of one.

it’s also rooted in racialized misogyny because of the notion that traumatized dark-skinned girls are inherently more mature than their light-skinned peers. it strips brown girls of their innocence and acts as if their experiences are ‘justified’ or ‘less harmful’ because naturally, of course, they can handle more. again, katara is still very much a child and is no one’s mother, please stop viewing the brown women in your life as emotional dumpsters. and finally, katara is the youngest sister. i am the youngest sister, and although my relationship with my sibling is one that’s not similar to sokka and katara’s & is too complex and personal to unpack on tumblr.edu, it is a universal fact that we are insufferable. we’re bossy & can be really mean and snarky. it’s in our nature to make our eldest sibling(s)’ life as hard as possible. the “himboification” of my brown king sokka is also rooted in racism & fandom’s general affliction towards critical thinking. y’all literally cannot handle when a brown man is intelligent and the terrible takes around his character shows how y’all don’t actually engage with the text but just view these characters as barbie dolls to dress up with whatever imaginary traits and ‘headcannons’ you pull out your ass.

basically, while sokka leans on katara’s emotional and domestic labor, she also leans on him as the ‘plan guy’ and as her older brother who’ll be there for her no matter what. they both feel strong duties to uphold the sacrifices of their same-gender parent but through their arcs, they subverted their respective gender roles and redefined what being ‘the last waterbender’ and a ‘warrior’ meant. they are both deeply traumatized children who raised one another and are nowhere near capable of raising kids.

#sokka #katara #sokka and katara #analysis #asks #anon #im slowly learning that its impossible for me to give a concise answer #i just love these siblings so much!!! they're the greatest #post s1ep3 all of sokka's sexist moments are honestly just reflections of his own insecurities in his masculinity #anyways i dont trust yall with sokka..... i mean ofc besides ... well you know who u are <3 #and same thing with katara...... i refuse to let yall adulterate the most well written teenage girl in western cinema PERIOD #writing this reminded me of how important their respective relationships with aang are because #he really showed them how to have fun and enjoy things just to enjoy them #anyways #people who dont get sokka dont understand abed and they dont understand wirt!!! let's talk about it #god i hope this is cohesive and answers ur question sometimes i ramble and completely forget what the point of what im writing is because i #get too excited #feel free 2 lmk if this isn't the answer u were looking for

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hoe-doroki · 4 years ago

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bad days ft. izuku

Todoroki version here

pairing: Izuku x g/n!reader

genre: hurt/comfort

warnings: depression

wc:1.4k

edit: I no longer write x reader but here’s my old masterlist - mobile | desktop

As soon as you woke up, you knew you wouldn’t be getting out of bed.

Your boyfriend’s alarm was set before dawn, even when dawn meant 6am. He always had the drive to get an early start, even when his patrols kept him out late. Even though his days were often dotted with villains and hard choices, he always got up ready to face whatever was ahead of him.

What a disappointment you were in turn.

Izuku got up immediately, muscles always taut and ready to go first thing, just so that he could bolt for his alarm and turn it off as quickly as possible in the hopes that he wouldn’t rouse you from your slumber. Sometimes he was so fast that you thought he must be using One For All—which was very possible, knowing him.

You felt him get up and heard him slip into his joggers, not turning on a light even though the night was still reaching into your room. And then you lay there. Wishing for sleep, not because you were still tired, but just for the hope that it would turn off your brain, even for a little bit longer.

But that didn’t happen. When it became evident that it wouldn’t, you tried to convince yourself to get up. To make breakfast for yourself and Izuku, to get dressed, even just to go to the bathroom to relieve your bladder. But you couldn’t. Beyond all reason, you were totally paralyzed.

You didn’t know how long it had been when you heard the front door open and close again, signaling Izuku’s return. Again, your brain urged your body to get up, to greet him at the door, or at least show him that you were capable of standing today. But you gave up quickly.

Izuku crept back in your room, taking off his sweaty shirt and glancing over at you to see if you were awake. When he saw that you were, eyes glazed, staring somewhere in the vague direction of his leg, he came over.

“Hey, Y/N,” he said tenderly, crouching down to your level. “How are you?”

At the concerned face of your boyfriend, you mustered everything inside of you to defy gravity and lift the heaviest smile, keeping it from teetering as best you could. You even made sure your eyes squinted so that it looked real. “I’m fine, Izu. How was your run?”

“It was good.” Izuku’s frown didn’t dissipate. “I know you were feeling kind of down last night, so I wanted to know if you were feeling better?”

“I’m okay.”

He didn’t believe you. That much was obvious from the deepening frown to the thick crease between his brows, visible even under the sweaty hair clinging to his forehead.

“Are you thinking that maybe you don’t want to get out of bed?”

It hit like an accusation. Izuku had the gentlest voice in the world at times like this, but it still stung like a callout.

There wasn’t any fight in you, though. You couldn’t bite back, couldn’t lie through your unbrushed teeth the way you might have wanted to. You weren’t angry. Just heavy—the guilt and shame hard to breath under. And in that moment, you couldn’t pull a response out any more than you could pull yourself out of bed. You just let your face fall and your gaze with it so that you didn’t have to meet Izuku’s lively green eyes.

Izuku reached a hand out to tilt your chin back up to him, his frown now turned up into a sweet smile. “In a perfect world, would you like to shower today?”

You weren’t sure. You’d showered the previous morning, so, strictly speaking, you could get away with skipping it.

“You know,” Izuku said, voice taking on an almost teasing tone, “I don’t think I’m talking to Y/N right now. I think I’m talking to Y/N’s depression.”

It was silly. His eyes were shining as they met yours, which you knew were dull despite the morning light beginning to creep in through the curtains.

“I happen to be very well acquainted with both,” Izuku continued, “and I know that your depression is really good at getting you stuck, but that you, real you, is really good at doing something once you get started. So, how about a shower?”

He didn’t give you much of a choice as he pried the blanket out of your loose hold and threw it back, then picked you up bridal style, holding you against his sweaty chest.

“Now you’re going to need it,” he joked.

When the two of you made it to the bathroom, he set you down on the toilet and proceeded to turn on the faucet to heat up the water. He then helped you out of your pajamas before stepping out of his joggers.

“I’m just going to pop in for a rinse,” he said, stepping in before the water was quite hot and letting the sweat wash off his body. When he was done, he came out, plugged the tub, and came over to you.

“You’re all cold,” you commented, putting a limp hand on his goosebumps.

Izuku shrugged. “Not for long.” Then he reached out a hand and you took it, standing up when he gave a gentle tug.

He moved to sit in the tub and you sat between his legs as the water rose. Izuku wrapped his arms around you, tucking his chin over your shoulder, and held you there. You clung onto his forearms and let out a sob, so grateful for Izuku’s patience with you.

“There you are,” Izuku said, rocking you both side to side, barely enough to cause waves in the bath.

“Don’t you have to go to work?” you whispered.

He shook his head against your shoulder. “I still have time. Besides, if I can’t help the person in front of me, what kind of hero would I be?”

Even against the steam of the bathroom, the tears rolling down your face felt hot. You held Izuku tighter and rasped, “You shouldn’t have to save me.”

“But you save me every day.” Izuku pressed a kiss into the base of your neck. “I take better care of myself so that I make sure that I can come home to you after work.”

“I thought you had your mom for that.”

Your voice was listless, but you could still feel Izuku’s smile against your skin. “I need all the help I can get.”

He reached past you to turn off the water before it got too high and settled back.

“Can you reach the soap, sweetie?”

You could, and you handed the bottle back Izuku, who squirted a bit in his hands and rubbed them together in front of you before running the suds up both your arms and then his. When you cupped your hands in front of you, he gave you some soap too, and you got to work on both of your legs. Everything he asked, you were able to do, and when you were done, you leaned against his chest, feeling some of the weight you’d felt on yours wash away.

The water grew tepid and you felt Izuku pressing his gnarled, pruny fingers into your shoulder. “Time to dry off, love.”

He helped you up and handed you a towel to dry off with. When you were through, you took the initiative to begin rubbing lotion on your body and even brushed your teeth. When the two of you made it back to your room, you slipped on some underwear and then stood in front of your dresser unsure where to go from there. Izuku was fully dressed already and handed you one of his well-worn sweatshirts.

“Why don’t you wear this?”

He helped you with the rest of the decisions for getting dressed and then sent you off to cook some eggs. Then the two of you could make a plan on what else it was that you wanted to get done that day.

You felt like a child, lacking in all independence. Your boyfriend had to hold your hand in order for you to meet the basics of self-care. The shame of it threatened to send you right back to bed as soon as Izuku left for work. You were on your way there when you heard your phone buzz. You picked it up, figuring if you were going to mope in bed, at least you could scroll through Twitter. But what you saw was a text from Izuku saying:

We save each other, sweetie. Good luck today!

Phone in hand, and smile on your face, you walked back out to the living room and replied:

Good luck! I love you <3

The sun from the window cast a glare on your phone, so you upped the brightness in time to see:

I love you too <3 <3

#bnha x reader #deku x reader #izuku x reader #midoriya x reader #bnha fanfiction #bnha fanfic #tw: depression #deku fanfiction #deku fanfic #deku imagine #deku imagines #bnha imagine

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itsclydebitches · 4 years ago

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Was planning on making this my own post, but I thought you would be more suited to discussing this sort of topic. Something I've noticed when it comes to the more prominent/important/strong female characters (Nora, Pyrrha, Penny, Robyn, Emerald, Sienna) is that RT often has the tendency of giving them masculine allusions (Thor, Achilles, Pinocchio, Robin Hood, Aladdin, Shere Khan) as if they are unable to stand on their own as characters unless they have that connection to a male character. 1/3

It is worth discussing! Yeah, I hesitate to call it a pattern just because, as you say, Team RWBY themselves are an exception to the rule — and as the title characters of the story, they’re a pretty big exception. We also have good women allusions turned into good women characters (Glynda with The Good Witch, May with Maid Marian) and bad women allusions turned into good women characters (Winter with The Snow Queen — I don’t think she was ever meant to enter full antagonist territory, but that’s another post). So it’s not just a matter of saying, “RWBY models their strong women after male inspirations and turns all female inspirations into male characters.” It’s not that simple. But the fact that it’s not simple doesn’t mean there’s nothing there to unpack because I definitely understand the feeling you’re pointing to, anon. Team RWBY feels like it has the most thought put into it in terms of changing up these allusions, specifically when it comes to subversion: the little girl in a red hood who previously needed a hunter’s protection has become the hunter herself, Belle overcomes both her Gaston and the now evil Beast, Snow White extracts herself from her own abusive situation (with a little help from the Dwarves still), and Goldilocks is no longer lost and in need of basic necessities, but can rather punch her way out of any establishment — like, say, a club. The execution of these themes aside (how Adam was handled, turning Jacques’ arrest into a joke, etc.), there’s a commonality here that works. Or at least, it works for me. Yet when we expand the allusions past our title team, things get... very messy. That’s when we start to hit on these concerns.

I’d say the problem stems primarily from that lack of thought, not the act itself of turning women characters into men or vice versa. Meaning, as I’ve said in the past, RWBY’s use of allusions is terribly unreliable nowadays, and that’s not just in terms of plot expectations like, “Why did Penny have to become a flesh girl because Pinocchio, but Ironwood didn’t stay good because Tin Man?” It also includes these questions of why these changes were made and what sort of messages they send. As you lay out, why are so many of our heavy hitters — the most talented huntress, the lightning-immune smasher, the Maiden android, etc. — based on men? Why are many of the effeminate and “weaker” men — Jaune the untrained, Ren the emotional councilor, Oscar the kid who wants to talk it all out — based on women? Again, I don’t intend to sling any hard accusations, but rather to point out what’s likely a subtle, unconscious bias. To provide another example, I’ve seen talk recently about how RT (again, unconsciously) depicts the faunus, where all the good characters have culturally established “good” animal features and all the bad character have culturally established “bad” features. It’s cat ears, rabbit ears, sheep ears, monkey tails, dog tails, and beautifully changing skin color vs. scorpion tails, spiderwebs, bull horns, tiger ears, bat wings, and crocodile scales. Is it a perfect 1:1 divide? No, Ghira has panther claws and Fennec has fox ears, but there’s enough there for us to go, “RT tends to give the good guys cute features and/or features we associate with safe animals, whereas the bad guys tend to get ugly features and/or features we associate with dangerous animals.” I feel the same way here, that there’s a bit of a trend at play, with the caveat that there are more complications simply by virtue of these allusions being, well, complicated. But there’s enough there to make us stop and think, “What were RT’s intentions with this? If they just chose something based on the rule of cool, what might those inclinations tell us about gender norms in America?” Meaning, when someone goes, “Idk, we just thought it would be cool to change this up” there’s a lifetime of media consumption driving that choice. It’s not actually random, but based on whatever has been normalized — unless you actively counteract that by thinking through what you want the change to do.

Unconscious biases are always at work. When we analyze something like this it’s often not a matter of saying, “The author is [insert accusatory term here]” but rather just, “The author is falling into expectations, patterns, and normalized decisions based on the culture they’ve grown up in.” Which includes things like thinking, “Well, if this character is based on a male god, she must be crazy strong. If this character is based on a woman fighter, he’s probably more emotional.” Such biases may be driving a lot of decisions because, as said in the past, I really don’t think RT is putting much thought into these allusions, if any at this point. For me, Penny was proof of that — the inability to see how following her allusion utterly destroyed her character growth — but even if we don’t agree about Penny, what about Salem? Far from just using her name, this volume gave us a blatant reference to the events of Salem Trails in the 1690s. Namely, the burning of the witch.

Except references like this can’t just look cool. This isn’t a video game Easter egg with no real connection to the story, it’s a cinematography/plot choice that carries meaning. So what is that meaning? Well, the thing about the women on trail at Salem is that they were innocent. This is what that reference says: “Hey, remember that real life event where women who weren’t witches were horrifically killed because others thought they were evil? None were actually burned, but culturally we tend to think they were. So that’s the image in our collective mind: innocent women on fire.” Except... Salem is actually a witch. Salem is evil. Salem is guilty. Or at least, the questions surrounding the extent of her guilt — How much responsibility does she hold in comparison to the Gods? How much agency does she still have after the grimm pool? — has not been acknowledged by the text. Yang just yelled at Salem for killing her mom and Oscar is about to blow her up. This is not a “Question Salem’s humanity” scene, it’s a “Kill the witch” scene... yet it uses an allusion that is contrary to what the moment is trying to achieve. So what are we supposed to take away from this? Do we adhere to the subtext and believe that Salem is innocent somehow, ignoring what the actual text says, or do we uphold the text and in doing so undermine the reliability of every other allusion in the show? If we can’t trust Salem’s, why would we trust, say, Penny’s?

RWBY’s allusions are all over the place and yes, I think that lack of consideration extends to who they randomly decided to genderbend. There’s no acknowledgment of — let alone engagement with — how many of these characters and historical figures were trying to pass themselves off as another gender, nor does RWBY acknowledge how the need to do so feeds into our current and historic assumptions about gender as a whole. Why does the man dress as a woman? To keep himself safe and seen as a non-threat. Why does the woman dress as a man? To gain access to places previously barred from her and to gain the respect she otherwise wouldn’t be afforded. And, of course, in 2021 there’s the expectation that media will include trans characters, GNC characters, non-binary characters, cis characters uninterested in practicing traditional femininity/masculinity, etc. None of which RWBY tackles outside of May, a woman who references a systematic transphobia we otherwise never see in the show. May, as a minor character, is great and I am in all honesty thrilled that she exists in the RWBY canon. However, the rest of the show is built on an anime conception of gender — combat skirts and bare midriffs in the snow — while nevertheless engaging with the very complicated question of how you re-imagine canonically/historically gendered people. As a “girl power” show, RWBY has opened itself up to questions like, “Okay, it’s great that you made these four fairy tale girls kickass, but can we talk about making Joan of Arc into a bumbling guy whose presence as a blonde, blue-eyed, sword-wielding man taking up lots of important screen time has generated accusations about this being a male-centered show?” It’s not a “RWBY is horrible for doing this!” issue, but a “RWBY is deliberately playing with gender and marketing itself as a progressive show, so... let’s figure out what these individual choices are actually implying and whether or not we consider that progressive.”

#rwby #mymetas #Anonymous

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