#and the euron of it all????

[from-ib-to-asshai]

i genuinely need someone to make an au of what would happen if balon would have SOMEHOW won the wotfk

[mechanicalchickens]

Normally, kinslayers are limited to at most a couple of fratricides, filicides, and matricide/fratricide before having to move on to lame shit like cousin killing. Overcome this limitation with one weird trick...

[death-of-cats]

what if while theon was hostage, maybe before, euron came up and was like "hey balon it;s me your creepy ass wizard brother,. yeah i can see the future, look, the northmen are going to make that kid their bitch. he's gonna serve them like a dog. he's not going to be a man when they're done with him" and balon just believed him and it wouldn't even be a lie.

[duchess-of-oldtown]

One thing that always gets me, is Quellon Greyjoy. You got this ✨tall✨ scary dude who could have been a big fucking threat but decides to be a reformer. He tries to fix the reputation of the Iron Islands and the Greyjoys. And he dies in the most Ironborn way, in battle at sea, probably thinking at least "I did something to be proud of and the Islands are on the way to a better relationship with Westeros". But then his kids are literally an eldritch horror, a dumb thot, a religious fanatic and one short king and they just undo all of his work in like five mins. You cannot convince me that Quellon was not looking up from the depths of the Drowned God's watery halls like

[harlothane]

Aeron & Theon - Views on each other

[lives4lovesworld]

Daenerys could literally be the devil reincarnated and it is still infeasible for her to be the one to torch King's Landing;

A desperate Cersei (who is essentially a female!Aerys), a violent hord of religious zealots, two (rightfully) blood-thirsty sand snakes, the tyrells and lannisters about to be at each other's throats, shady Qyburn doing gods know what, are all IN King's Landing. A cocky would-be claimant is marching with deadly-infected, nothing-to-lose, bell-triggered Jon who-regrets-burning-a-city Connington TOWARDS it, and murderous crazy newly crowned Euron Greyjoy lusts for the Iron Throne.

Yet according to the ✨smart book experts✨all these plots will apparently freeze and these murderous hotheads will patiently wait for Daenerys to speed run through all of her essosi plots; travel to Vaes Dothrak, gather all the khalassars, travel to Meereen by horse pace, fight the war against the slavers, deal with Victarion, the Iron fleet and the Dragonbinder, deal with Viserion and Rhaegal being loose, Quentyn's death and his remaining companions, Yunkai and its allies, burn the dead from the pale mare and the war, divide fiends from foes, which the later includes her husband and the Green Grace (tho both could be dead by the time Daenerys returns) meet Red Priest Moqorro and Maester Marwyn, hear about Azor Ahai and the Others, meet Tyrion Lannister, face Jorah Mormont again, hear from Illyiro and Varys's many schemes, mend the wounds of her people, get a large enough fleet to carry her host somewhere and cross half of the world (a journey for which Tyrion and Quentyn needed an enitre book) with a bus stop at Volantis, where she will likely meet Benerro and The Widow At The Waterfront and council the slave revolt, etc... so she is The One™ to barbecue King's Landing since *checks note*... itS sO SUbvErsIve, but also; iTs bEen bUilT uP to ThAT sInCe Aegon’s Conquest. 🤡

[dirtytransmasc]

maybe it's because I'm in the "I'm so obsessed and hyperfocused on my little guys I will make any song seem like it's about them even if it couldn't be any father from actually relating to them at all" stage of my Theon and Asha hyperfixation but like...

I feel like 'I bet on losing dogs' by Mitski is about them.

it's about Asha and her relationship with Theon.

he's her baby brother. the baby brother who looked up at her smiled when she had gone in his room, intent on strangling him to stop his cries. he's her losing dog. the dog she keeps fighting for when no one else will. she never gives up on him, not truly, even when he is so clearly doomed, because she loves him, she won't give up on him.

and Theon is, in so many senses, a dog. he's been passed around from owner to owner, home to home, trained and beaten and domesticated, made to behave how his owner at the time sees fit. he's a good dog, a good beaten dog.

and now, in a way, he's Asha's dog. she doesn't want him to be her dog, she wants him to be her brother, and Theon's trying, he really is trying, she knows he's trying, but part of him will always be doomed to be a dog waiting to be hit, waiting for a command, waiting to be trained.

he's her losing dog, she knows it, knows he's doomed, deep down, there's little hope, he'll die a damned dog, but fuck it she doesn't care, he's her blood, her baby, he will be by her side no matter what. she'll always go back for him, she'll always fight for him, she'll always tell him to stay, she'll always give him a chance, she'll always try.

~~~~

[addamvelaryon]

DEAD THINGS IN THE WOODS. DEAD THINGS IN THE WATER.

I was once again thinking about how Patchface has a tendency to say some rather odd things, and if you view the phrase "under the sea" as an indication of death/afterlife, the things he says take on a more sinister connotation:

Patchface rang his bells. “It is always summer under the sea,” he intoned. “The merwives wear nennymoans in their hair and weave gowns of silver seaweed. I know, I know, oh, oh, oh.”

— A Clash of Kings, Prologue

Patchface was capering about as the maester made his slow way around the table to Davos Seaworth. “Here we eat fish,” the fool declared happily, waving a cod about like a scepter. “Under the sea, the fish eat us. I know, I know, oh, oh, oh.”

— A Clash of Kings, Prologue

“Under the sea the old fish eat the young fish,” the fool muttered at Davos. He bobbed his head, and his bells clanged and chimed and sang. “I know, I know, oh oh oh.”

— A Storm of Swords, Davos V

They found Her Grace sewing by the fire, whilst her fool danced about to music only he could hear, the cowbells on his antlers clanging. “The crow, the crow,” Patchface cried when he saw Jon. “Under the sea the crows are white as snow, I know, I know, oh, oh, oh.”

— A Dance With Dragons, Jon XI

Patchface jumped up. “I will lead it!” His bells rang merrily. “We will march into the sea and out again. Under the waves we will ride seahorses, and mermaids will blow seashells to announce our coming, oh, oh, oh.”

— A Dance With Dragons, Jon XIII

“Under the sea, men marry fishes.” Patchface did a little dance step, jingling his bells. “They do, they do, they do.”

— A Dance With Dragons, Jon XIII

Patchface drowned but survived under mysterious circumstances:

The boy washed up on the third day. Maester Cressen had come down with the rest, to help put names to the dead. When they found the fool he was naked, his skin white and wrinkled and powdered with wet sand. Cressen had thought him another corpse, but when Jommy grabbed his ankles to drag him off to the burial wagon, the boy coughed water and sat up. To his dying day, Jommy had sworn that Patchface’s flesh was clammy cold.

No one ever explained those two days the fool had been lost in the sea. The fisherfolk liked to say a mermaid had taught him to breathe water in return for his seed.

— A Clash of Kings, Prologue

The previous passage almost seems to echo the following:

He had been the thirteenth man to lead the Night’s Watch, she said; a warrior who knew no fear. “And that was the fault in him,” she would add, “for all men must know fear.” A woman was his downfall; a woman glimpsed from atop the Wall, with skin as white as the moon and eyes like blue stars. Fearing nothing, he chased her and caught her and loved her, though her skin was cold as ice, and when he gave his seed to her he gave his soul as well.

— A Storm of Swords, Bran IV

That's not the only connection that exists between the merlings and the white walkers:

Mormont was deaf to the edge in his voice. “The fisherfolk near Eastwatch have glimpsed white walkers on the shore.”

This time Tyrion could not hold his tongue. “The fisherfolk of Lannisport often glimpse merlings.”

— A Game of Thrones, Tyrion III

Which of course reminds me of Cotter Pyke's ominous letter to Jon Snow:

At Hardhome, with six ships. Wild seas. Blackbird lost with all hands, two Lyseni ships driven aground on Skane, Talon taking water. Very bad here. Wildlings eating their own dead. Dead things in the woods. Braavosi captains will only take women, children on their ships. Witch women call us slavers. Attempt to take Storm Crow defeated, six crew dead, many wildlings. Eight ravens left. Dead things in the water. Send help by land, seas wracked by storms. From Talon, by hand of Maester Harmune.

Cotter Pyke had made his angry mark below.

“Is it grievous, my lord?” asked Clydas.

“Grievous enough.” Dead things in the wood. Dead things in the water. Six ships left, of the eleven that set sail. Jon Snow rolled up the parchment, frowning. Night falls, he thought, and now my war begins.

— A Dance With Dragons, Jon XI

Dead things in the woods. Dead things in the water. Here's the description of the white walkers and the merlings:

Will saw movement from the corner of his eye. Pale shapes gliding through the wood. He turned his head, glimpsed a white shadow in the darkness. Then it was gone. Branches stirred gently in the wind, scratching at one another with wooden fingers. Will opened his mouth to call down a warning, and the words seemed to freeze in his throat.

[...]

A shadow emerged from the dark of the wood. It stood in front of Royce. Tall, it was, and gaunt and hard as old bones, with flesh pale as milk. Its armor seemed to change color as it moved; here it was white as new-fallen snow, there black as shadow, everywhere dappled with the deep grey-green of the trees. The patterns ran like moonlight on water with every step it took.

— A Game of Thrones, Prologue

They tell of pale blue mists that move across the waters, mists so cold that any ship they pass over is frozen instantly; of drowned spirits who rise at night to drag the living down into the grey-green depths; of mermaids pale of flesh with black-scaled tails, far more malign than their sisters of the south.

— The World of Ice and Fire, The Shivering Sea

Pale and black and grey-green. All frozen.

There is also this similarity of both being said to lay with human women to sire terrible offsprings:

He remembered the hearth tales Old Nan told them. The wildlings were cruel men, she said, slavers and slayers and thieves. They consorted with giants and ghouls, stole girl children in the dead of night, and drank blood from polished horns. And their women lay with the Others in the Long Night to sire terrible half-human children.

— A Game of Thrones, Bran I

An even more fanciful possibility was put forth a century ago by Maester Theron. Born a bastard on the Iron Islands, Theron noted a certain likeness between the black stone of the ancient fortress and that of the Seastone Chair, the high seat of House Greyjoy of Pyke, whose origins are similarly ancient and mysterious. Theron’s rather inchoate manuscript Strange Stone postulates that both fortress and seat might be the work of a queer, misshapen race of half men sired by creatures of the salt seas upon human women. These Deep Ones, as he names them, are the seed from which our legends of merlings have grown, he argues, whilst their terrible fathers are the truth behind the Drowned God of the ironborn.

— The World of Ice and Fire, The Reach

We know the dragons are contrasted against the white walkers, but perhaps the merlings are too:

The big man looked out toward the terrace. “I knew it would rain,” he said in a gloomy tone. “My bones were aching last night. They always ache before it rains. The dragons won’t like this. Fire and water don’t mix, and that’s a fact.”

— A Dance With Dragons, The Dragontamer

Although no one can say for certain exactly what kind of creatures Euron (who, while not exactly THE NIGHT KING, is still very Night King coded) plans on summoning from the sea, but perhaps the merlings are part of his plan.

[dyannawynnedayne]

Listening to Clash of Critics discuss Bran II from AGOT and thinking about how Jaime really just threw himself out that window huh whats more fitting of a member of the kingsguard than destroying the dreams of a young boy who idolizes you by committing an act of violence against him

[sowthetide]

Quen ❤️

[a-throne-of-lies]

House Sparr

***DISCLAIMER*** House Sparr is a canon house residing in the Iron Islands. They are so tiny there is basically nothing on the actual characters, so I have taken the liberty of expanding on them myself. Rodrik Sparr & Steffarion Sparr, as well as The Sparr (Serion), are all canon. Please keep this in mind when reading.

Introduction.

House Sparr of Great Wyk are a noble house in the Iron Islands. They are among Balon Greyjoy’s bannermen.

Their coat of arms is an oak saltire on blue; when Eliar Sparr runs away, he adopts a new standard: a brown sparrow over a burning sun on sand.

Their words (non-canon) are: “From two now as one.”

Current family tree.

Serion Sparr: Born 242 AC, perished 300 AC, killed in battle on the deck of his ship during an attack.

Cira Flint-Sparr: Salt-wife of Serion, mother of his children and his eventual Lady wife. Born 244 AC, perished 271 AC in childbirth. Cira was taken from her home in Breakstone Hill by Serion in 257 AC. Most did not recognize her as the true lady of Great Wyk.

Eliar Sparr: Eldest son of Serion and former heir of Great Wyk. Ran away in 272 AC from the Iron Islands. Born 259 AC, perished in 298 AC, beheaded by Eddard Stark under the command of King Robert Baratheon I for treason.

Rodrik Sparr “The Vole”: Second eldest son. Head of the house as of 300 AC. Born 263, still living.*

Avya Sparr: Only daughter of Serion. Captain of the ship Redsalt. Born 265 AC, still living.

Steffarion Sparr: Youngest son, born 271 AC, still living.*

Andaren Sparr: Brother of the Night’s Watch. Former Ghiscari slave, adopted and brought to Westeros by Eliar. Born 280 AC, still living.

* rodrik’s association to house sparr in a dance with dragons is not known, only that he is a sparr. he is the head of house in my canon.

* steffarion is the heir in a feast for crows but he is not in my canon.

[death-of-cats]

The King's Prize, ADWD

The Turncloak, ADWD

Two exiles.

[duchess-of-oldtown]

This Week on Keeping up with the Greyjoys...

Theon: I'm on a voyage of really finding myself again

Asha: Stannis is just really out here enforcing gender roles in a fucking crisis... anyway back to that asshole who flips his hair and left me walking in a fucking blizzard on a broken ankle

Victarion: WHAT DO YOU MEAN GRINDR ISN'T AN APP FOR SHARPENING MY WEAPONS *smashes phone*

Euron: *showing off his entire collection of villain costumes* It's all about dressing for the job you want not the one you have.

Aeron *tied to a bow of the Silence*: EEEEEERRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH

Balon: ☠️

[thehauntingofharrenhouse]

remember euron greyjoy still wants to marry daenerys, the person in the world most capable of and likely to kill him on sight

[rise-my-angel]

Also just a shoutout to Victarion whose such a petty bitch about the things that are his fault. Like hes so angry at Euron for raping his third wife, and is planning on sailing through the Dothraki Sea (which isnt a sea btw its literally fields of fucking grass), and taking Daenerys for himself instead of giving her to Euron, as retribution for his third wife.

Meanwhile, Victarions the one who honour killed his own wife after she was raped, and fed her corpse to fucking crabs. Like, I want you to explain to me how you crying when you beat her to death still make her death Eurons fault.

I think "I beat her to death with my own hands", is where her death starts and stops at being your fault, buddy.

[fromtheseventhhell]

"Rhaegar is a prophecy obsessed man"

"He doesn't love anyone"

"He just wanted prophecy babies"

???

Did i miss something in the books? I get it, Rhaegar cared for the prophecy because the threat of the others is real, but why do people believe this dude is a fucking robot? O.o

Also, didn't Grrm call him "love struck prince"?

You didn't miss anything in the books, fandom just loves coming up with reasons to justify their hatred toward Rhaegar. Portraying him as a soulless, heartless monster just makes that easier than using what's actually written about his character.