#and the biggest one is if i’m so bummed about the way i look i can definitely change it

[hearmyvoiceoftreason]

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[eddiesxangel]

Clueless | Eddie Munson x Reader

Summary: Eddie’s an idiot and can’t pick up that you’ve been flirting with him for months…so you take things a step further.

Cw: SMUT, dom/mean!eddie, name calling (whore/ slut)

4 months ago…

Tonight you sat at the bar, your usual Saturday night hanging with your friends from school. There was live music and you’d been eying the lead singer for about three weeks. They played here every Saturday and tonight you brought your roommates Nancy and Robin to join you so they could finally see the mystery man you’ve been going on and on about.

The three of you had been there for about twenty minutes before they took the stage.

“They should be on any minute,” you say as you hear some of the people in the college car cheer. Your eyes instantly find the stage and your heart flutters. There he is, in all his glory.

You hear Robin's gaps and you look at her immediately.

“What is it Bin?” You ask

“Nothing!” Nancy cut her off before she could talk. She gave Robin a subtle nudge and she caught on.”

“Nothing-nothing I-uh swallowed the wrong way” she pretended to cough. What the hell is going on?

You’d forgotten about how weird they were acting halfway through the set. You'd gotten up to dance and enjoy the music. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of him. As the three of you got closer and closer to the stage it seemed like he couldn’t stop starting in your direction. A bright smile spread across his face and you couldn’t help but blush. You’d hoped it was because of you. You’d made eye contact and almost turned into a puddle.

After the set finished the three of you found an empty booth and took a break from dancing.

“So what did you guys think?” You asked excitedly.

“They were great” Robin smirked.

“Yea usually not my kind of thing but I liked it” Nancy giggled.

“Ok, what is going on? You’re acting weird?” You winced.

“Should we tell her?” Nancy looked at Robin.

“Tell me what?” You asked.

They didn’t get a chance to answer.

“Buckley! Wheeler!” You all turn to see the man of your dreams appearing at your booth.

Your eyes go wide when it finally hits you. They know him. This is amazing! They can introduce you!

You thought the night went as well as it could have. Eddie was glued to your side, he was the biggest flirt, and he gave you compliments about your hair and how you smelled really nice. You were touching his arm and giving sublet hints that you also found him really attractive. On top of that, the conversation was cheeky and fun, you never had an awkward moment where you felt like you needed to fill the silence. the conversation was great, he was really easy to talk to. So when you went home alone, you were beyond bummed.

Eddie and you were always gravitating towards one another whenever he would come over to visit with Robin and Nancy or when your roomies asked you to come to the bar with them to meet some friends from high school. You had become attached to one another very quickly.

One month ago…

“Eddie, can you help me with something? You called him over from in the kitchen.

“Sure thing sweetheart” he got up from the rest of the group and made his way to you. Your stomach flip-flopped any time he called you a cute pet name.

“How can I be of your assistance?” He clasped his hands behind his back.

“I can’t open it” you pout pointing the lid of the pickle jar towards him.

You were making a charcuterie board. Did you really need help? Absolutely not. The jar had already been opened but any excuse to get Eddie near you you took.

“You could have called any of the guys but you wanted me to help you with the pickles?” Eddie smirked. *pop* The jar opened with ease.

“Well yeah” you took a step closer so you see in his space. “You’re just so strong.” You graze your hand against his bare bicep before giving it a squeeze.

“You have Steve the jock to call over” he raised a brow. Is he being serious right now?

“well...yeah. But I’m sure all that strumming doesn’t hurt” You bit your lip as you tilted your head up at him.

��Eh,” he shrugged his shoulders. Passing you back the jar.

“Oh um, we’ll… thanks” You turn back to the wooden board feeling defeated as he went back to the rest of the group

3 weeks ago…

* ring, ring, ring*

“Hello?”

“Hey Eddie, it’s me” you smiled.

“Sweetness, how are you?” He asked

“I want to have a movie night next Friday.” You just came out and said it. No more beating around the bush.

“I’m down, what’s the genre we are thinking here?” He crossed his arms over his chest while the phone rested between his ear and shoulder.

“Hmmm, I don't know. Horror?” You chide.

“I didn’t think you liked them scary” he smirked.

“But I’ll have you to protect me” You throw him yet another bone.

“I’m sure you won’t need me with everyone there.” He shrugged.

“E-everyone?” You stutter.

“Yea, who else is going?” He questioned.

Shit. You rolled your eyes and stomped your foot like a child.

“Uh I’m, not sure on the final numbers yet.” You strutted.

“No worries Princess. Count me in” You could hear the smile in his voice.

“See you then Eddie” you hung up with a defeated sigh. UGH

2 weeks ago…

Movie night. You had the living room all set up, ready with drinks, snacks, pillows and blankets for everyone. The lot of you piled up in your small apartment, Robin Nancy, Steve, Jonathan, Argyle, and of course Eddie.

Ten minutes into watching the original Halloween movie you ‘shivered.’ You were sat between Jonathan and Eddie.

“You cold?" Jonathan asked pointing beside him.

“I am but I’m sure Eddie won’t mind sharing with me?” He already had the blanket draped over his lap.

“Hmm?” Eddie hummed.

“Mind sharing some blanket I’m a bit chilly.” You scoot a little closer towards him.

“Oh uh yea sure” he draped the blanket over your lap while his eyes never left the screen. Fully immersed in the story.

“Thanks Eddie.” You placed a hand on his upper thigh.

Eddie didn’t bay an eye. He just continued to keep his eyes on the screen.

As the movie progressed you genuinely were getting scared. Micheal Myers had jump-scared you one too many times. It was about the fifth one by the time you grabbed onto Eddie’s arm. Eddie just smirked down at you as you covered your eyes into his shoulder.

However, Eddie sat there like a statue, unfazed by your advances. Eddie never seemed to be bothered by them, but he also wasn’t picking up what you were putting down.

Halfway through the third movie, you'd given up. He didn't put his arm around you, he didn't ask if you wanted to be protected. And He never reacted to your hand placed on his upper thigh. All of your moves were useless, and you hoped you didn't make a fool out of yourself in front of your new group of friends.

1 week ago…

Nancy and Robin started to gush about how cute the two of you would be together and it was only making you grow more impatient that he wasn’t making a move.

“Am I just not pretty?” You bit your cuticle. You were sat with your two roommates in your shared living room having a relaxing evening in.

“What are you talking about?” Nancy quipped.

“Not true, trust me, babes, you’re a smoke show, trust me I'm a lesbian.” Robin pipped up making you laugh.

"What brought this on?"Nancy looked at you with concern in her eyes.

"I’ve been throwing myself at Eddie for months! And he hasn’t once tried to make a move?” You admitted.

“He’s so dumb” Nancy said under her breath.

"I'm sure Jonathan thinks I'm pathetic. He had to suffer through my attempts during our movie night, which by the way was supposed to be just Eddie and I but he had to ask about who else was coming and I panicked!" You burry your head in your hands.

"Want me to knock some sense into him?" Robin asked.

"God no! That's the last thing I need" You shook your head. "He probably is just trying to avoid hurting my feelings... maybe he doesn't know how to turn me down so he's pretending like it isn't happening." You thought out loud.

"Nu-uh I know for a fact tha-OW" Robin looked at Nancy after feeling her kick her under the table.

"What Robin is trying to say, is that you and Eddie are perfect for one another, trust us. He will eventually see. Sometimes you have to be literal with him.

What were they not telling you?

“I don’t know…has he ever said anything about me to you guys?." you fiddled with your cup.

You look up to see Robin and Nancy give a knowing look to one another. They weren’t telling you something. They were not being subtle.

"Believe me, you don't want to give up yet." Robin reassured.

"Ohhhh kay," you sighed and changed the subject.

Today

You were so nervous but excited. Eddie has finally asked you to hang out one-on-one. You'd thought maybe this was it, the line would be crossed, and the initial step over the hump would be taken. You were so hopeful and you repeated Robin's words over and over again in your head. You don't want to give up yet.

Before arriving you had prepared yourself. You did everything from shaving to picking out a matching bra and pantie set. You had spraying yourself with the same perfume he'd complimented you on the first night you officially met. You did your hair and makeup, and don't even get started on how long it took to choose the perfect outfit that was cute enough to look like you weren't trying too hard but looked amazing in non the less.

You knocked on the apartment door that read 416. You could hear the eager padding of Eddie making his way to the door. He opned it with a swoosh and his hair blew back like he was n a goddamn shampoo commercial.

"Hey Princess, come on in make yourself at home." He greeted you with a warm hug. As he let go he scanned you up and down. You didn’t miss the way his eyes lingered on your chest. You’d picked a v neck top that extenuated your tits, even if it was just a t shirt.

“So what did you wanna do?” He asked as you examined his place. It was exactly what you’d imagine. Very boy, a bit cluttered but not dirty. It smelled fresh like he just put in a load of laundry.

“Would you teach me some guitar? If you don’t mind, I’ve always wanted to learn.” You smirk.

“You sure you want me as a teacher?” He tilts his head.

“Well why not have the best?” You flirt.

“Come on my guitar is in my room” he took your hand a lead you down the hall. Bingo

You walked into Eddie’s room and he lead you to sit in the edge of his bed.

“Ok sweetheart, first thing you need to know are the chords” he picked up his acoustic and handed it to you.

He sat beside you and proceeded to instruct you on where to place your fingers. Your hands not use to the awkward positions they kept a slipping away.

He placed each of his thighs on the sides of yours so you were sat right between his lap. His broad chest was pressed up to you.

“Here like this” Eddie scooted closer so he could help you place your hands in the correct position. You could feel his body heat radiating off of him as he placed his hand on yours. You swore you felt a jolt go through your body when he touched your skin.

“That’s better.” He whispered and your body broke out in a shiver as his breath cascaded down the side your neck.

“I think I’m getting the hang of it?” You look back at Eddie. He was so close your noses almost brushed. You could see his cheeks flair up into the pretties shade of pink you’ve ever seen.

“Yea….” He was so close he just needed to close the gap! This was it, this was the moment. He just needs to lean in and….

“Here let’s try a few together now.” He moved your strumming arm to around the front of the guitar.

You were screaming at him him your head! The opportunity to kiss you was right there! Why didn’t he make a move?! Better yet why didn’t you? You cursed yourself for not being the one to lean in.

As you shake yourself out of your thoughts you feel his large hands move yours so you played a few notes in a row.

“Very good sunshine” he smirked. Those butterflies were back fluttering in your stomach.

You leaned back into Eddie’s chest with a hum. You felt his whole body on your back. His broad shoulders, his chest, his soft tummy and his hard crotch…

Your eyes blew wide open at the realization that Eddie was hard.

Eddie jerked back “I ugh, excuse me I just uh need to use the bathroom.” He mumbled before jumping off the bed like a bat out of hell.

You couldn’t believe it! So he was attracted to you…more than attracted at what you had felt. So why on earth did he run away?!

It has been a few minutes since Eddie left the bedroom and he still wasn’t back. Was he jerking off? It was he just waiting for it to go down?

You assumed it was the latter because in the middle of your internal monologue he walked back in.

“Sorry bout that, where were we?” He rounded the corner

“I think right about here” you hooked your thumbs under the hem of your shirt and swiftly pulled up your shirt, bra included and flashed your bare chest.

You didn’t think Eddie’s beautiful brown eyes couldn’t get any bugged but the sure did.

“Sweetheart, what uh-”

“Come on Eddie, don’t be shy” God he was so nervous it was adorable.

“Princess I-uh? you sure?”

“Of course I’m sure. You can touch them if you want.” You bite your lip.

Eddie doesn’t waist a second and rushed back towards the bed.

“Holy shit” he whispered to himself while cupping a breast in each hand. Eyes never leaving your chest.

You can only giggle at his reaction. He looked up to see the smile that broke on your face and couldn’t resist but to kiss you.

The moment his lips met yours it was like everything finally fell into place.

“Fuck you haven no idea what you do to me” Eddie gently pushed you down so you were on your back and inserted himself between your legs. he helped you take off your top and bra.

As his hand’s massaged your breasts you couldn’t help but moan into his mouth.

“Ya baby?” He ground his hips into your clothed centre.

“I want you Eddie.” You moaned

“Is that right?” Eddie asked cocking his head to look down at you.

You nod your head frivolously.

“You so desperate for this cock that you had to expose yourself to me like a little slut, is that it?” he growled in your ear.

This was not what you were expecting Eddie to be like in bed… well actually it was, before you’d met him. The rockstar version you’d seen on the bar stage 6 months ago. You’d expected him to be like this, but not your Eddie you know now. You imagined the Eddie you know now to be soft and gentle.

“Shit” you sigh as he bit down on the side of your neck.

“Mmmm you like that don’t you? You like being a whore for me?” Eddie slid down to latch his mouth on your nipple before flipping the two of you over.

“You want me so bad? Prove it.” he started unbuttoning his pants.

Your mouth watered at the sight of him when his cock was released from the confines of his underwear.

Eddie was big. You knew that when you felt his cock pressed against your lower back. But feeling it was much different than seeing it.

“Com’on babydoll” Eddie stroked your hair as you lowered your head to the tip of his cock. He let out a grunt when you gave it a chaste kiss.

“Don’t be a tease” he chuckled.

You engulfed him entirely running your lips to the base, the tip hitting the back of your throat. You dragged your head back up to the tip then fully down again.

“Fuck you’re taking me so well” he gripped your hair

You pop him out of your mouth and stroked his length with your hand.

“You like that Eddie? You like me being your dirty whore?” You say as you pump him in your hand.

“Fuck baby you’re filthy” he breaths.

You crawl up to kiss him as your hand still works him. His lips are so soft, and so gentle compared to the words that have been coming out of his mouth.

“Gotta fuck you.” He pulls away and pushes you back on your back and in one swift motion, Eddie pulls down your pants and underwear. “She’s already ready for me” he leaned down and licked you from your glistening hole to your clit in one agonizingly slow swipe.

“Mmmmph Eddie please” you ground your hips up for any sense of relief.

“Patients darlin’ ” he smirked before sucking on your clit.

“No, I’ve waited long enough, fuck me now.” You demanded.

“Yes ma’am” he didn’t even hesitate. His cock plunged into you. You let out a moan of pleasure as he stretched you out.

“Fuck you’re so big” you praise as he pulled almost all the way out

“You can take it” he slammed his hips back into you.

Eddie was relentless, he abused you cunt with no second thought to it.

“Fuckin should had this pussy weeks ago” he gritted through his teeth.

“You could have if you weren’t so-FUCK ME!”you cried.

Eddie didn’t let up, the way he was pounding your pussy was like heaven in earth. He slid his hand between your two bodies to massage your clit. It took him no time to find.

“Uuuuhhhhhnn” You called out in pleasure.

“What was that baby? I could have had you weeks ago? I bet I could have you little slut but I was waiting for the perfect moment” Eddie panted.

“Yes yes yes yes” you chanted. Yes to him and yes to the feeling of him hitting your g spot with each trust. Your orgasms was building and building.

“You gunna cum on this cock? Hmmm” he mocked.

“Fuck yes! Please I wanna cum so bad. Please. Fuck me Eddie, fuck me so good” you cried.

“Come for me baby girl” he cooed, still massaging your clit.

“Eddie!” You called as your orgasm took over your whole body. Waves of euphoria pluses through you.

“Good girl” Eddie praised and you shook below him. You cunt tightening around his cock was enough to throw him over the edge, cum spilling into you. Eddie rolled off you and layes down beside you.

A few moments of silence passed before you spoke up.

“So didn’t you know I was flirting with you this whole time or?” You looked over at him

“Pffft of course I did” he looked up at the ceiling.

You raised a brow at him. Even if he couldn’t see you Eddie could feel your eyes burning into him.

“Sure you did” you scoff with a laugh.

“Don’t make me come back over there” he threatened.

“Ooooo I’m so scared” you roll over and laugh into his cheek.

“Get over here” he pinned you down to the mattress.

Safe to say he definitely showed you two more times that night.



[gojobbg]

I’m glad your askbox is back on ♡ may I request something with Yuta and how Rika would behave (would she?) towards someone he has a massive crush on? I feel there will be a Conversation™️ between the two when things get spicier with reader, idk~ ily, have a lovely day!

omg Rika would be soo like possessive but willing. like, she would never go out of turn, but she wouldn't just stand around and let him do whatever without explanation

pairing: reader (f) x crush!Yuta (aged up) ft. Rika

warnings: kissing, touching

a/n: ily2 anon!!! thank u for the req :') happy i turned on my ask right when you wanted to send a req

Rika would never let Yuta live it down.

He, too, never expected that he'd love anyone again the way he did Rika. It was a love so profound that he could not let her go. His soul is forever bonded and imbued with her love, something that has proven to be his biggest strength. But then, there was you.

Yuta's eyes would always follow you whenever you'd train, staring in awe at the way you performed as if fighting were a tango. He'd study you at a distance, sat at a few benches with Toge and Panda. With hands weaved together under his chin, he'd stare at you adoringly. But, Rika would remind him of her existence and lightly push the bench he sat on, forcing all three of the sorcerers to try not to fall forward.

"Huh?" Panda exclaimed, looking over at Toge quizzically. He looked up at the clouds, "the wind can't be that strong, can it?"

Yuta looked over at the confused pair with a sheepish smile, "sorry. Rika was... feeling playful."

Even in the dining hall, Yuta would work up the courage to go sit with you and the other sorcerers. Taking a seat across from you, he'd quietly hum a, "good evening, y/n."

You consciously had to make sure you didn't smile too much at his presence and would give a small bow, "good evening, Okkotsu." Although the both of you were similar in age, he was still Gojo's student, and you had too much respect for him.

When Yuta spoke to you, there were fireworks. His heart felt elated and full just hearing your words, and the way you spoke. How gentle the words came out of your mouth, your tongue flicking right at your enunciations. He could remain like this here, with you, forever. But, as he lifted his spoon full of soup, the spoon immediately shot out of his hand, and straight through the bowl and table, to the ground.

"S-sorry," Yuta hums in embarrassment, immediately letting out a deep sigh before beginning to clean up. But you jumped to your feet to help him, creating a bigger problem in Yuta's heart... and pants.

"No worries, let me help!" You chime.

Finally, with much time and patience, Yuta was able to confess his feelings for you. His dark circles felt as though they cleared when you reciprocated his feelings. But in Yuta's head, he was quite surprised that Rika had yet to react. Little did he know what was to come.

You contently invited Yuta over one night as he finally had some time off. Gojo was grateful for all the missions he had taken up during a short and very needed period. He relieved him of his sorcerer duties for a week, in which Yuta had no plans besides you.

When he entered your apartment, the air immediately went hot. Although the two of you hadn't done anything yet, the sight of you in a little tank top and pajama pants was enough to do things to Yuta. Your chest was bare under that tank top, and the pants were doing your ass wonders.

He'd just stare at you, watching your lips move as you asked about his day. But once you realized he wasn't listening (and he reason why), you immediately went quiet and felt your cheeks warm. Yuta's exhausted eyes lit up, energy returning to his pale skin.

In moments, his hands snake down from your sides to your waist, slowly making its way to your bum. His dark blue eyes hold hesitance, searching for constant reassurance in your own. "Is this okay?" He murmurs, cheeks completely flushed with his bottom lip wedged between his teeth. Once you give him the greenlight, nothing stops Yuta from enjoying you.

Cold lips meet your own, and the two of you finally closed the gap. The usually respectful and patient Yuta was now replaced with the ever hungry beast before you. His tongue dragged mercilessly against your bottom lip, forcing entry to tango with your own. He tasted of green tea and fig.

You could feel his fingers dent into your ass, his force pushing your body into his own. His back meets with the wall, and your body follows suit. He smells so good... feels so good... your hands sneak its way to the top of his pants, tugging teasingly. When you did, Yuta quickly pulled away.

He kept hold of you, staring down at your beautiful face. His heart could explode now from just the way your eyes met his own. They were filled with lust and worry. "m'so sorry to stop us like this... do you think it's okay if I have a moment? With Rika?"

Your cheeks go hotter, but you understood completely. You turn around and gesture the balcony, "go ahead there. I won't disturb you." You were not even an ounce upset, and Yuta couldn't be more grateful. Leaving a peck on your forehead, he calmly walked over to the balcony and slid the door shut behind him.

In the privacy of the outside, Yuta walked over to the ledge of the balcony, propping his forearms over it. He let out a long sigh before looking up to adore the stars. He begins to toy with his ring with an amused smile, "I never realized you could do that, Rika." He referred to the way she had made the ring spin while the two of you were kissing. "I must be pushing your buttons, huh?"

Rika was above him, holding onto the side of the building. Tears began to escape her body, her hand shakily reaching down at Yuta. "Yuta..." she cried, her usual shriek replaced with a calm whimper. Yuta couldn't dare scold her, for her feelings weren't wrong.

Turning around, Yuta looks up at her and smiles, "I know; this isn't fair to you. I would give the world to reverse what happened to you, and have you here with me properly. But that isn't what happened."

Rika remains still, her gaze falling to the door of the balcony, in which you resided on the other side of it.

Yuta continues to smile brightly, "I know you don't like sharing but she... y/n, she's good to me. And I need her like I need you. She keeps me safe like you do." He walks up to her, offering a hand. "Please be kind to her, Rika."

Rika leans down slowly, hesitantly. As she cowers her head, she asks quietly, "love me [still]?"

His hand pats her head gently, "always. That will never change, Rika. I promise." After a few moments, Rika seems to accept and finds comfort in his touch. Before she exits her physical form, she causes Yuta's ring to spin once more. He chuckles, shaking his head, "I know, don't worry."

Yuta joins you back inside, where you quickly jump up and rush to him. "Did everything go well?" You ask in a hush tone.

Yuta nods, "nothing to worry about."

[finelinevogue]

paparazzi nerves

summary - you get nervous around the paps

word count: >1k

pairing: boyfriend!harry x reader

You noticed the paparazzi before anyone else did

It had been easy keeping your holiday location a secret from fans, but somehow the paparazzi always seemed to be able to find you.

Harry’s tour had finished only days ago and now you were spending time together, relaxing and having fun. It had been hard to really dedicate time to one another when Harry had been touring every other day, but now it was time for rest.

Harry had rented a couple of small boats to drive over to a little island he had read about in one of his Italian travel books.

Now you were all arriving and soaking up the glorious sunshine, only to be rudely interrupted by the faraway lenses of the paparazzi.

Harry was on another boat, talking to James and Tyler, whilst you remained on a different boat with Gemma.

You and Gemma weren’t the biggest fans of the sun and the heat, so any opportunity to sit in the shade was taken instantly.

Gemma was sat in her pink dungarees, whilst you were sat in your yellow summers dress. The one that Harry said made you look like a summers dream.

As Gemma continued to read, you kept getting distracted by the paparazzi on a boat in the distance.

You’d never been one to really acclimatise to the constant clicking of photos. No doubt they would be focused on taking photos of Harry - especially when he’s sitting there shirtless, but part of you still remained uneasy.

“I might go and see if there’s a toilet nearby.” Gemma said, standing up and rocking the boat slightly.

You nodded, standing up too.

“I’ll go over there.” You pointed to where Harry was. “Just so I’m not alone.”

“Alright.”

Gemma wandered to the front of the boat, but before she can clamber out Harry has made his way over and is now standing at shin length in the sea.

“Y’alright Gem?” He asked and you couldn’t help but smile at how much of a gentleman he was. Always keen to help out and lend a hand.

He offered his hand for Gemma to hold and step out of the boat, which she took gladly.

“Yeah. Just going to the loo. Your missus needs company, though.”

“Oh does she now?” He turned to look at you once Gemma was out safely. He smiled brightly at you, checking you over and admiring how much you were glowing in the Italian sun.

Gemma kissed Harry on the cheeks before leaving.

Harry then jumped the boat and you bit your lip to hide a laugh when he nearly lost his footing. The idiot was trying to show off, not that he had to for you.

“Y’need me, do you?” he asked, walking over to you where you were still standing in the shade.

“Didn’t want to be sat here like a loner. I’d have been like that one photo of Taylor where she’s sat on the back of a boat by herself.”

Harry laughed at that, finding his arms wrapping around you to pull you in for a hug. He squeezed tight and you sighed into his warm chest. His hugs were always the best. Like your own personal teddy bear.

“Never would let you feel lonely, baby.” He kissed your head.

“I know.” Your lips kissed his chest as you spoke, due to how smushed against him you were. “Have you put suncream on?”

“Yes.” Harry whined.

“Oi, I’m just making sure you still look appealing when we’re older and not some wrinkly ball sack.” You explained, making Harry laugh again.

“Is that all I’m here for? Huh? Appeal for you?”

You tilted your head back to face up at him. “I thought you knew that already.”

Harry squinted his eyes and shook his head at you playfully.

What’s worse is that he brought his large hand down to your bum and gave it a pinch through your dress. The moment only lasted a second, but it was enough for you to step away and push him off of you.

“Harry, don’t.” You said sternly.

Harry knew you meant it too, because you used his actual name and not some other endearment.

“Hey, baby, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He said.

You sat down where you had been sitting before and huffed. You ran your hands over your face and tried to breathe slowly.

“No, i’m sorry.” You shook your head.

“What for?” Harry was confused. He sat down next to you, but made sure you had your own space until he knew what he was in for.

“I noticed the paparazzi here before and now I’m just paranoid. I mean, y’know I don’t deal well with them.”

Harry looked around you and only then noticed the small boat of about five photographers. Luckily he was wearing sunglasses to hide his dark stare, but he was severely pissed that they were here. Invading his private time.

What’s worse is that they were making his girlfriend uncomfortable.

“Hey, look at me. Y/N, honey. C’mere.” He twisted your legs to dangle over his and moved your body so that your back was to the paparazzi. “I’m here. Just us.”

You looked at him and noticed how he was only focused on you. You reached to move his sunglasses and pulled them down for a second to look at his eyes. His pupils were dilated slightly with the look of love he had for you. You pushed his glasses back up and settled in closer next to him.

“Just us.” You nodded.

Even though it wasn’t just you and the paparazzi would be taking photos of this moment no doubt, including the one of Harry pinching your bum, it was settling to know that Harry was here and he was doing this with you.

“Screw them. If I want to touch my girlfriend in public, I will.” You gave him a look. “W-with consent of course.”

You laughed then. “Harry I don’t care when, how, why you touch me. I.. I just… Let me know beforehand if we’re in public settings or if the paps are around. Please?”

“Promise.” He nodded seriously.

“Love you.” You reached for his hand and held onto one of his fingers with your entire hand. His hands are massive compared to yours - something the fans are always pointing out and crying over.

“Love you too.” He encompassed your hand with his and rubbed small circles into the back of your hand.

“Can y’kiss me now?”

“Never going to say no.”

[only-lonely-star]

First Dates with Curtis Gang !! (HCs)

(These might sound a bit ‘inaccurate’ to some, but I personally think everyone would be a bit nervous/shy on a first date as well as being more soft. I mean, it’s a date with just the two of you, trying to look tough isn’t their biggest worry lol. I try to keep everything as accurate as possible. I also tried to keep these as gender neutral as possible but I am a cis fem so I can really only see scenarios through my own eyes. I’m trying!)

Warnings - Just fluff, how I think a first date situation with each member would go

Author’s Note - I GOT THREE FICS COOKED UP IN MY DRAFTS WHICH EXPLAINS MY INACTIVITY !! ENJOY 🫂

*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.* *.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.* *.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*

Ponyboy

He would lose his mind trying to make everything perfect. I feel he’s not the type to ask someone out without being friends or at least acquaintances first, he has to know you. He needs to know some of your interests, things you dislike - basics. He’ll curate the date and try to incorporate things he knows you’re into to create better conversation.

He definitely thought he was going to get rejected when he first asked you on the date. He mentally rehearsed what he was going to say for at least a week until the date planned finally arrived. He purposefully tried to look his best that exact day to impress you further.

Ponyboy would sooo take you out on a movie date ☹️. He would go for someone who shares similar interests as him - the love for movies a big one on his checklist. He would save up to buy tickets for the both of you to look good instead of just sneaking in. He might even bum Darry of a few cents to ensure he had enough.

“So… how’s about we go see a movie tonight? Tickets for two, on me.”

He definitely smiled like a complete idiot after the question was posed, feeling embarrassed already.

His biggest accomplishment of the night would be to ‘subtly’ hold your hand. He’s too scared to straight up grab it, so he would try to work his hand towards yours as the movie progresses.

He felt more mature than usual. A first date with you was probably his first date ever so it was probably an even bigger deal to him than most.

Johnny

He had his eye on you for a good while before he finally found the right opportunity to ask you out. I can see him watching you from afar in class or somewhere during school, sitting there and drowning in admiration. He would give little side glances with a straight face so that nobody would think he was looking your way. He is Mr. Nonchalant at its finest 🙁🙏🏻

He would finally break it to Dallas he’s got the hots for “some kid at school” and ask how he should make a move. Obviously Dallas would tease him a bit, only to give him tips Johnny would never use. “You go up to ‘em, tell ‘em where the date is - introductions later. Add a little kiss on the cheek and there ya go.” Johnny would probably force a laugh or something and make a mental note to do the exact opposite.

HE WOULD ASK YOU TO A DINER !! I literally can’t stress this enough, Johnny needs to be able to be a listener at times and the speaker at others. He would strategically plan this shit out and eliminate any other ‘typical first dates’ besides going out to eat. Conversation gets awkward? He’s planning to shovel some food in so you feel obligated to talk more. This gives him a good opportunity to get to know you more and ask for your opinions on the food there, which flavor of milkshake you prefer best, or small talk about school and things you may have in common. He’s such an observer and he’ll find lots to talk about when it’s just you two.

Similar to Ponyboy, he was probably so worked up about thinking of asking you on the date. I can see him picking at that little area of skin beside his nails while he asks you, giving you a lopsided smile because he felt stupid. He’d try to think of some excuse to talk to you before asking you out.

“So I was thinking if you, y’know… wanna get something to eat later…? We could go to that diner if you’re up for it.”

He would literally not stop smiling when you accepted the offer. Johnny would do a good job at hiding the flustered feeling pretty well, but hiding a smile that big is hard for him.

I honestly don’t see him as the type to try to impress people. He is who he is and he wants someone who will actually be interested in his normal self. I don’t see him trying to fancy himself up or anything along those lines.

During the date he would try to sneak as many little glances as possible without trying to show it. Obviously he finds you attractive if he’s desperate enough to ask you out, but he doesn’t want to seem too obsessive.

He’d offer to walk you home and be the bigger person even though he doesn’t like to roam around alone at night anymore. He’d be a little hesitant, but he wants to feel protective of some sort and what better what to show it than walk you home and keep you safe?

Dallas

Surprisingly, if Dallas truly has interest for someone he won’t be so bitter about it. He can’t control how his own personality is perceived by others, but he’ll surely tone it down a bit just for your sake.

Social anxiety is afraid of Dallas. He’ll be in the middle of the most mundane task when he notices you. I can totally see him at a gas station, filling up Buck’s car, or attempting to steal some cigarettes from a corner store when he bumps into you. Unlike the others, I feel as if he goes solely off of looks before personality. He’s so raw and isn’t afraid to speak his mind.

His flirting style is a bit aggressive but it surprisingly works half the time - if the attraction is mutual of course. Dallas would say some corny pick up line or straight up call you some pet name before posing the question. He’s definitely the persistent type for sure. If you turn him down he’ll try and persuade his way into the date becoming an official plan.

“Damn, baby - I forgot all about our date tonight,” while proceeding to show he’s checking you out, no hesitation. While you’re over there confused out of your mind, he’ll laugh to himself and attempt to get you to play along.

“I’m serious. Be over at Buck Merril’s Roadhouse at ten.”

I can’t see him doing anything cutesy or romantic on a first date. He’s like the opposite from most, he’ll save the sweet stuff until he’s comfortable and knows he can be more vulnerable with you. His idea of a first date is something he would most likely do with friends.

Dallas would invite you over to lay down with him and get to know your personality better. He’s not so excited to know all of your interests and desires yet, but rather how you are as a person and your morals. He’d probably try to put on a movie in the background while inviting you to share a blunt in bed. He finds conversation to be what reels him in most, and he knows the best conversations flow when high.

He would be such a tease the entire night. He would let small comments slip, even small touches and gestures to help ease you into growing more comfortable with him. He’ll make it his goal to have you wanting more and more of him - hopefully leading to more dates to come.

Sodapop

He probably fell in love at first sight and immediately knew the two of you would have chemistry.

I just know he saw you at the DX and waltzed right up to you with that big, charming grin on his face.

Soda is definitely more bold when he asks somebody out because he knows he’s handsome. Anyone in their right mind wouldn’t reject him.

“Name is Soda, Sodapop actually,” while he proceeds to introduce himself to you and converse for a few minutes before asking the big question. I feel he’s such a friendly and kind person so he’d definitely be good at making interesting conversation and let it flow naturally before he even attempts to mention a date.

“We should totally see each other sometime. Like - soon.” followed up with a sweet smile while he waits for your response.

I feel like he’s such a family type of guy. He would have to make sure you love his friends as well as Ponyboy and Darry only because he sees them as brothers too. I feel like Soda would have a big hangout with the gang where he invites you and weasels his way into claiming it’s a ‘date’.

I think of something casual and fun like a bonfire where you all chit chat and make s’mores, huddled up against each other. This seems more of like a fall/winter type of date but HEAR ME OUT!!

So of course, you accept his offer and head over to his place where you meet the others and accompany them while sitting beside Soda.

He would for sure tell them about you before hand and try to make them get their act together because he feels as first dates are more important than others. Leaving a good first impression is vital. “Just be cool, we’re gonna have fun, don’t embarrass me this time... please?” with a cheesy ass smile to seal it in.

STOP BC SODAPOP IS SUCH A KISS GOODBYE TYPE OF PERSON !!

Soda would try to get all cuddly and shit by the fire the whole night, progressively getting more bold. He would start with small compliments and smiles, moving towards looping an arm around you, etc. By the end of the night he feels like he’s made enough progress to get a little goodbye kiss from you, even if it’s a small peck on the cheek.

“Aw, come on, no kiss?” as he gently places his hands on your upper arms.

Steve

Steve seems like such a sweet guy once you get past the whole ‘tough guy’ exterior he likes to keep up. He would definitely have to know you a bit before asking you out, so I think you would be somewhat friends with him previous to the big question.

He lovesss people with that natural spunk so I can see him taking you out to some party for kicks. Nothing crazy, but some small venue where music is bumping and the two of you can just share a good time without having to worry about much else.

OKAY SO Steve is definitely more of a bolder type of person when it comes to asking someone out. He’s not shy or nervous or anything - more so expectant.

He gets a bunch of attention from all kinds of customers at the DX although they usually rush to see Soda first.

He gets a lottt of tips from Soda on how to shoot his shot and not get flat out rejected.

Steve would probably have been crushing on you for a good while before making a move. I can see the two of you are engaging in the gang’s typical activities, hanging out or chit-chatting in the lot. Steve tries to subtly have some alone time with you when he executes the big question. I just know he asked Soda and/or Dallas to help distract the others 😭

He’ll try and keep his cool even though he’s beyond excited to finally spill it. I’m talking like clearing his throat and uncontrollably smiling seconds prior.

“What do you say to maybe goin’ to some party with me come this weekend?”

All goes accordingly and here comes the day of the date. He’ll try his absolute best to look spotless just to further impress you.

He would offer to pick you up and everything as he tries to seem like a gentleman.

Once you arrive, he would break the ice immediately and take you by the hand to dance, not caring enough to waste time being stuck in that awkward phase.

I just know he would get so flustered when you come in close contact or have some form of physical touch within a specific dance. Steve Randle is touch deprived. He loves that shit.

During upbeat songs he would actually kill it and own the dance floor with you with no shame whatsoever.

Whether it’s an upbeat and groovy song or a more slow one, he’d make the most of every moment with you and try to make this night one to remember in hopes you’ll want to go out again sometime soon.

Darrel

Darry would be the best boyfriend to ever exist, lemme tell you right now.

He’s definitely a big family guy as well, so it’s not surprising he would want someone who’s willing to commit and have intimate and vulnerable moments with.

Since he’s 20, I feel this is a time for him where people his age start to forget about having a stupid high school relationship and begin looking for a serious relationship.

I’m getting ‘friends throughout teenage years, lovers as young adults’ kind of vibes from Darry. The two of you most likely kept in contact and see each other here and there since senior year ended.

Darry would have mentally prepared himself to ask you out for a date at least a week in advance after noticing he’s caught feelings for his high school buddy.

He was most likely pacing around and trying to script out his lines before he finally gathered enough courage to call you. Since seeing each other face to face is harder to get around with work and watching out for his brothers, he resorts to calling you late at night when Soda and Ponyboy are asleep.

He wouldn’t stall or try to linger on about the topic, he would get straight to the point, just like ripping off a bandaid.

“Hey, it’s been a minute since I last saw you and everything. How does a date sound? I’ve been eyeing that restaurant downtown for a while…we might enjoy it.”

I know he would be giggling and smiling nonstop after you accepted his offer 😭

Come the day of the date, Darry had saved up enough to make a reservation at the somewhat fancy restaurant he mentioned on the phone call. (It’s canon that Darry would most likely be a soc if it weren’t for the gang so I’m envisioning this date based off of that.)

He would so give you his jacket/blazer before he sat down on his side of the table. I’m talking like wrapping it around your shoulder type of thing.

The restaurant is definitely more fancy than the usual diner he’d buy some cheap fast food from, but not fancy like some banquet. He would try and make everything run smoothly by planning it beforehand with the booking, nicer outfit, and picking you up to drive you there.

During the date he would sit and admire you from across the table as you awaited your food, loving the sound of your voice as you rambled on and on. He would’ve planned this whole thing out, trying to come up with a date where you could get to know one another without having to do much else. The point of the date is to talk, not have fun and goof around - but maybe catch up on life together.

Two-Bit

He isn’t one to settle down and usually goes after someone on a lonely night or just for kicks. When he does fancy someone for a long period of time, he makes sure you know it.

I get a lot of ‘friends with benefits’ kind of vibe from him because he seems to be the friendly type who can get along with pretty much anyone. Since he finds you attractive and a pleasure to be around, you settled for this weird arrangement.

Weeks into this situationship type of bond, he realized he may want more than a casual flirty friendship.

He’s definitely bold too, like BOLD.

Two-Bit wouldn’t be shy or anything when asking you. I think he would straight up say something blunt like “Let’s go on a date. Sound like fun?” And then proceed to list date ideas to you.

HE WOULD TAKE YOU SOMEWHERE FUN!!

I can see him taking you to a car show or something and being able to crack jokes and show off his knowledge on cars to you. He brings the good vibes and fun, so even if the date doesn’t sound too appealing to you, you’re guaranteed to have a good time with him.

At the show, Two-Bit would definitely gasp and fawn over every pretty car and continue on and on about the make, model, and how unique the style of it is. He would make small comments and flirtatious suggestions just to make you smile.

“Like that one? Imagine all the fun dates we could go in that!”

Y’all might flame me for this but I think he loves hugs 😭. By the end of the date he would initiate a semi-long hug and smile smugly while you caved in and hugged him right back.

Also gonna get flamed, but he would call you cute names and things super casually. In the middle of a sentence he’ll refer to you as “baby”, or “darling” even though the two of you aren’t dating.

He’s a sweetheart deep down and yall know it. He would go the extra mile when he genuinely likes somebody. He would act a gentleman and share his interests with you. HE CARES!!

[b00tyliciousbabe]

my baby daddies - ep. 2

wyatt cushman x male reader

summary: the scoop on how wide i buss it open for mr cushman xx

notes: hi beautiful ppl, back again! once he go black, he'll be back again. tell them hoes that it's crunch time, abdomen. yes i cop mad chanel and mad given. she did it again, imagine them!!! sorry nicki ate that verse tf UPPP. bout to make these bum bitches mad again, okay lemme stop. I KNEW EXACTLY WHAT I WAS DOING W THAT BLACK VERSE XOXO. hope you guys are all doing well <3 i will be releasing 2 other series ("the DILFs' and a surprise one which will become coming soon ) so stay tuned! any requests? ENJOYYYY…

you and wyatt met at one of your first shoots. you were the stylist’s assistant and your boss had tasked you with making sure all the models had their hair, outfits, and makeup all ready for the editorials. you were admired by so many in the industry, icons and the public alike, and even though you didn’t have your own company, it was clear that you were on your way to becoming one of the biggest names in fashion history. you enjoyed getting to know all the models personally, and it made the whole process of getting ready much easier. but one person that always had you flustered was wyatt cushman, who you had become really good friends over the years. you definitely found him attractive, but he was so distracting; the agency called him ‘the menace’ with all the harmless trouble he got the two of you into. years had passed, the two of you remained really close, but it wasn’t until the balenciaga show, that the two of you vocalised the unspoken tension between you two.

you were responsible for all of the outfits for the fashion week at balmain, a huge role that olivier rousteing himself appointed you to do. it was a huge success and the press had a field day documenting your achievements. your biggest supporter, wyatt, was there to give you the biggest hug on the runway, garnering an even greater cheer from the crowd. “Y/N, you’re amazing” he said staring intensely in love as he placed his hands on your lower back. the distance between your lips decreased as the two of you shared your first kiss…in front of the entire world. you pulled away; being brought back to reality and how 4.5 million people had witnessed the two of you together, you couldn’t help but laugh, as everyone applauded and jeered at your love. the rest was history.

one thing about wyatt, he is the goofiest mf ever and you love it. he’s always cracking jokes and the life of the party. You feel so safe around him, don’t get it twisted, he’d beat the shit out of anyone who even looked at you the wrong way, but you could handle yourself. flashback to the time where y’all were celebrating your collaboration with vogue: you were dancing the night away with your friends when some guy decided to get a lil too close. the creep groped your ass to which he was served a fat slap across the face. he fell to the ground and the crowd started cheering. wyatt smiled proud that you were able to defend yourself - so proud, that on the way home you took a detour where you guys had the best make out session in the history of rom coms.

the golfer’s wife and the holiday maker:

this man is always travelling and he loves to share those memories with you. other than being his personal photographer, the two of you are able to explore so many different ways of living on your journeys and you dream together of living abroad one day.

On one of your holidays, you had decided to take your boyfriend stargazing “come on wyatt, i don’t wanna miss it” you say gripping his arm as you led him to a quiet space overlooking the ocean. “babe, I’m pretty sure the stars aren’t going anywhere,” he chuckled “and besides, the sky isn’t as pretty as the star right in front of me” he stops and turns to face you. he strokes your cheek, looking down at you with a smile that rivalled romeo’s love for juliet. y’all sat down watching how nature looked so peaceful. he started kissing on your neck, leaving light hickeys to mark you as his. straddling your bf, you deepened the kiss as you felt him grow uncomfortably large in his jeans. you undid his trousers as 8 thick inches of uncut hairy cock made contact with the chill of the night. “you don’t know how much this turns me on, y/n”

you continued sucking on his tip, swirling and drooling all over him as a pool of your spit congealed in his pubes. all the while his hands gripped your roots urging you to take more and more of his cock. you gargled and took him like a champ.

“babe, ughh, I’m bout to, uuhhh shit shit” he came deep down your throat, cleaning your chin with his finger and then poking it in your mouth as he made sure to feed you with every last drop.

you laid down, proud of your efforts to calm him down and your head tucked into cushman’s shoulder, as you began to feel sleepy. your bf noticed this and chuckled to himself, using the blanket he brought to make sure you wouldn’t get cold. “mkay, y/n kinda had a point, this is pretty cool,” he whispered, still riding the high you gave him “but it’s got nothing on him tho, my cute ass bf” wyatt embraced you tighter. the wedding bells were already ringing in his head.

MORE SLUTTY THOUGHTS:

• he deffo has a spit kink. not saying that he’d treat you as worthless scum but, he’d would make sure to slut you out. and you fucking loved it. “you’re a dirty little whore, aren’t you” he’d grunt raw dogging your ass as he spat in your face.

• as dominant as he is, he likes to give you your time to shine, always enjoying it when you spell coconut with your hips as you ride his pole. as I’ve mentioned already his smile drives you crazy, and this position has him cheesing the MOST. wyatt just loves to see how much you’re enjoying the experience, and nothing turns him on more than when he can see the pleasure on your face. “fuck babe, you look so sexy riding my dick.”

• this leads on to missionary, nobody fucks harder in this position than this man. he definitely compensates for his soft strokes in doggy and prone bone because of how hard he hits your hole in missionary. He turns primal as well, feeling your chest bounce up every time he’s balls deep, but all in all he’s crazy for how your bodies are so in sync.

[flippinpancakes64]

The Cullen with a human partner who has very noticeable freckles all over his body and who is discouraged that after the transformation they will disappear.

The Cullens with a reader with Freckles

I made this a little more general to include headcanons of the Cullens with a reader who has freckles. I also made it gender neutral/not specified.

Thank you and I hope you enjoy!

Edward:

He loves your freckles

When you’re asleep, he has nothing better to do than count them

He loves when summer rolls around and he can watch as the sun pulls more out of your skin

If you’re ever insecure about them, he shuts that down instantly

He loves them so shut up

Now according to Stephenie Meyer, vampires lose all of the melanin in their skin when they transform

But that’s stupid so I’m gonna ignore that

When he turns you, you notice that your skin is stuck in the permanent state of winter, where your freckles are at their most faint

He tries to reassure you that they’re still visible

It takes him one entire night of kissing all of them for you to believe him :)

Alice:

She thinks they’re adorable

She wishes she had some

Makes a point to tell you that

Again, she loves the summertime because they become more obvious

One time, she drew a picture of you in art class and you were stunned at the amount of detail in which she captured your freckles

Like she got them in all the right spots, right amounts, everything

Before she turns you, you tell her that you're concerned about your freckles disappearing

She tries to convince you that they won't, but to be honest she doesn't know for sure

After she turns you, she notices that you’re pretty upset

She helps you recreate your freckles with makeup if she notices that it really bothers you

But other than that she tries her best to help you forget

She reassures you that she still thinks you are very adorable/attractive

Jasper:

He thinks they are so enchanting

He gets lost just staring at you very often

Whether that's because he's staring at your freckles or just you is up for debate-

Either way he loves them

He gets shocked around the summertime

"Did you do your makeup today?"

"No, why?"

"'Cause you've got more of those spots than normal"

When he (or Carlisle, let's be honest) turns you, he instantly notices the difference

They're not all gone, but a good chunk of them are

He's a little sad too

But he still loves you so

He does his best to cheer you up

He uses his gift to make you feel better

Rosalie:

When she was alive, freckles were considered ugly blemishes

But she never understood that

She always thought they were cute

So when she sees you and all of the freckles that you have, she is instantly in love

Another one who counts them while you're sleeping sorry

She's the only one who actually has an answer about whether or not your freckles will stay when you get turned

She still has her beauty mark, after all

So at the very least, your biggest, most noticeable ones will stay

And when she turns you, she is proven right

Obviously you're both bummed that not all of them stick around, but she reassures you that it's okay

Emmett:

It isn't the first thing that he notices about you

He sees your personality first

Jk jk jk

I mean it's just not the first thing he sees

However, when summer rolls around and suddenly all of your freckles have multiplied and they're all darker, he notices

"So... what are all of those?"

"All of what?"

"The spots on your face... and arms... and chest"

He thinks they suit you though

One day, Alice used some foundation to cover them all up to play a prank on him and he was so shocked

Almost didn't recognize you

After he turns you, he doesn't really notice the difference

You're gonna have to point it out to him

But he just tells you that he still thought you looked the same

Reassures you that you're probably the only one who's noticed that you're missing a few

Esme:

She thinks they are adorable

I can see her having had a cousin or a niece/nephew who had a whole bunch of freckles when she was alive

She always wanted some

So she adores yours

Loves to stare into your face while you sleep or whenever you aren't doing anything

When you approach her with your concern, she honestly doesn't know the answer

She never had any significant marks on her body, so she never noticed anything missing when she was turned

After she turns you, if you are upset because you're missing a good chunk of your freckles, she tries her best to reassure you that it's okay

"You had more than enough to spare anyway :)"

Carlisle:

It's not really something he noticed first either

He sees so many people everyday that at some point you stop looking really hard

But as he gets closer with you, he notices all of your spots

He thinks they are so unique

It also makes him reflect on past beauty standards

He does go on a whole rant though about the science of freckles

Melanin pockets in the skin and whatever

Unlike literally everyone else that you ask, he does actually have an answer

The most prominent of your freckles will stick around, similar to Rosalie's beauty mark, and the lighter ones that really only show up in the summer will disappear

Mostly because you're not gonna be tanning anymore lol

He comforts you with science

And of course he tells you over and over again that you are still jst as attractive as you've always been

Vampire! Bella:

She's not too shocked

From the very few very grainy pictures I could find of Renee on Google, she has some light freckles all over her face too

So it's not like they're some new exotic thing to her

But again, she feels like they suit you

Like she can't imagine you without them

When you ask her, she has no clue

Like genuinely none sorry

But she reassures you that it can't be that bad

When you do get turned and you lose some of your freckles, she tries her best to console you

"I'm sorry, really I didn't know if they would disappear or not"

She tells you that you are beautiful/handsome/attractive either way

[chukys-mouthguard]

maybe smutty prompt 16 w mat barzal too?

Prompt: “You just can’t stay away from me for too long, huh?”

Note: I kind of liked the idea of this and felt like it had the possibility of turning into a longer version? So definitely let me know if anyone wants to see that!

Warning: sexual content

“Well, if not a dance, how about a drink?”

A sigh escaping your lips as you clearly were too nice. Not being able to turn down someone without caring about hurting their feelings or coming across like a bitch.

“Look, I’m not interested okay? Go try it on someone else.”

Cursing under your breath you ran a hand through your hair. Wondering if someone was playing a cruel prank on you that all of these below average guys had been hitting on you.

Tonight was supposed to be a night to get your mind off of him. Your go to booty call that also was the biggest asshole you’d ever met. For months you’ve been telling yourself to give it up and find something new. But so far all of the guys who were trying their luck with you weren’t anything compared to Mat.

Not to mention, he just so happened to end up at the same club as you. What were the odds of that?

“Fuck me…”

Cursing to yourself you tossed back a shot before heading out onto the dance floor. The countless shots and drinks kicking in as you danced along to the music. Swaying your hips as you sang along to the words blaring throughout the building.

Soon enough a hand snaking around your waist. He had found you and was making sure he didn’t let you leave with someone else.

The two of you couldn’t deny the chemistry you had, most importantly the sexual chemistry. Your hands exploring every inch of one another while your ass was practically glued to his crotch.

Not feeling like exposing anyone to the acts you two were in desperate need of, you both quickly headed for the door. Mathew pulling you quickly behind him as he led the way to his car. Adjusting the seats before climbing into the backseat, patting his lap with a cocky grin. Signaling for you to join him.

“You just can’t stay away from me for too long huh?”

A hand finding its place entangled with your hair as he brought you in for a kiss, the other gripping your ass. Sinking into his lap as you began to grind against his hard on that was growing in his pants, you elicited a low groan from him.

“Mmm, last time I checked, you came onto the floor and found me.”

Smirking cockily down at him he let out a soft chuckle. “Yeah, only after I saw you turning down every bum that was in that place.” His hand slipping under your dress as his fingers pushed your thong to the side. A surprised moan escaping your lips as he smiled up at you, dipping his fingers into your growing wetness.

“And we both know, none of them could get you this wet. Definitely wouldn’t be able to fuck you like I can.”

Pulling you in for a rough kiss, his tongue entangled with yours as he fought for dominance, wanting to be sure you knew he’d always be the best you’d ever had.

“Definitely couldn’t kiss you like I can.”

“Okay Mat, I get it, please just shut the hell up and fuck me already!”

His smirk went from cocky to lustful as your words struck a chord in him.

“With pleasure.”

[compacflt]

For the requests/open inbox, this may not be the lane you're looking for, but you made a throw a way mention in a response to the ask about Ice's enforcement of DADT that Bradley and Ice probably got into it at one point about Ice being totally okay with DADT as a policy (which I love your read on Ice being like, 'yeah, nobody should ask and nobody should tell. what's the problem here?') I would love to see that argument go down. Or honestly, just any Ice and Bradley interaction after the reconciliation that suits your fancy. I find that dynamic in your world super interesting. Bradley sees him as a father, Ice sees him as the person whose father I killed. I love the drama.

Five times Ice was so obviously Rooster’s dad + one time he explicitly wasn’t.

[Carole. 1994.]

He’s such a nervous man. Usually that’s not the word people associate with him. Nervous? Never! But he is. Carole Bradshaw’s more a religious woman than a spiritual one. She’s never put any stock into “chockras” or “ouras” or whatever the other girls her age were fooling around with in the late sixties and early seventies. But she does believe that you can understand a person just by looking at him or her, and when she looks at Tom Kazansky, she sees a little anxious creature, shivering in the cold, like one of those tiny spindly dogs who always needs a sweater. Maybe it’s her southern maternal instincts, something primal and animalistic inside her, I need to take care of you—and when he nudges her with a nervous shivering shoulder and whispers, “Can I bum a smoke?” —she reaches down to take his hand and says, “I only have one left. We’ll have to share.”

She knows she makes him nervous. His ears are red, and so’s the back of his neck. It’s early on a Saturday morning, and the church is crowded, and he’s self-conscious about the fact that she’s holding his hand. Good. It’s so rare she gets to make a man nervous anymore. She waves to Bradley, proud in his little striped button-down and his little blue bow-tie, where he’s lined-up with all the other aspiring pianists against the stage along the far wall, under the bare postmodern crucifix. The recital isn’t going to start for another five, ten minutes, and it’s organized by age, so Bradley’s somewhere in the middle. If Tom Kazansky needs a smoke, Carole Bradshaw will bum him a smoke.

They exit out the side door, and the low murmuring of the other proud parents in the church fades to the quiet of the alley. Birds chirping nearby. The sound of a latecoming car on gravel somewhere far away. Her cigarette and the flick of his lighter, her eyes on his mouth and his puff of smoke—it’s lit. He takes a drag, closes his eyes, then passes it to her. “Sorry to make you share,” she says, and she’s watching the red flush creep up the side of his throat with a silent pleasure. When she takes her own pull, she looks down to see that the filter’s gone the sweet red-pink of her old lipstick. Kind of like a kiss, sharing a cigarette.

“That’s okay,” he says. Nervous spindly little dog. “Uh, what’s he playing?”

“Beethoven. ‘Für Elise.’” Then, before he can think to judge, she goes on quickly: “It’s more complicated than you’d think. Goes up and down and all over the place.”

“It’s a good song,” Tom Kazansky says, “though I don’t know too much about piano.” He pauses. “I’m learning a little German, though. I think it’s E-leez-ah. She must’ve been an alright girl if Beethoven wrote a song for her.”

Carole Bradshaw doesn’t know what to say to that. So she says this instead: “Thank you for coming. It made Bradley—well, over the moon, I guess.”

Tom Kazansky smiles shyly. “Sorry Maverick couldn’t come. I know he wanted to.”

Of course he brings up Pete Mitchell. Drags her back into reality. “He’s in Washington again, isn’t he?”

“Correct.” He reaches out for the cigarette; she gives it to him. “TOPGUN’s biggest advocate. I keep telling him he should go into politics. I just talked to him yesterday—he told me he went to the Natural History Smithsonian on Wednesday—he bought Bradley a dinosaur picture book, I think. Does Bradley like dinosaurs?”

Carole Bradshaw shrugs. What nine-year-old boy doesn’t like dinosaurs, but… “He’s more into sea life these days. Whales, sharks, fish.”

“Some fish used to be dinosaurs, they think,” says Tom Kazansky, clearly just trying to fill the silence. Ears red, lips red. Smoke out of his mouth like a fire-breathing dragon.

Carole Bradshaw doesn’t know how much dinosaur history she actually believes. So she says, “It’s still really nice of you to come. You know, Bradley—Bradley thinks of you and Maverick as his—well, his fathers, I s’pose. So it’s nice for you to be here.”

She watches his reaction—just nervousness. Straight anxiety. He doesn’t meet her eyes, like she’s just kicked him in the ribs. He does not want to be Bradley’s father. 

She says, “You don’t have to sign any papers, Tom. You don’t have to put a kid seat in your car. I’m just saying. Don’t worry about it.”

He says, “I can hear the kids starting inside—we should probably go back in.”

So Carole Bradshaw drops the cigarette butt to the ground and steps on it with the bottom of her flat. They go inside, and wait for a kindergartener to finish an overly simple “Canon in D” to take their seats again. She takes his hand. He lets her. After another half-hour, Bradley sits down on the bench in front of the hand-me-down Steinway and busts out “Für Elise” without a single missed note. It still shocks her, sometimes, to watch him play—it still shocks her, sometimes, that she is the mother of all that talent. And now maybe Tom Kazansky is the father of all that talent. How did that happen?

At the end of the recital, Tom Kazansky lets go of her hand. She knew he would. Knew his fatherhood is only temporary. But he lets go of her hand to accept Bradley’s great-big hug in the parking lot: “Gosling, that was so good.” Bradley’s proud smile is missing a few teeth. It makes Tom Kazansky laugh.

And after he drops them off at home, and peels away with a wave and a smile, Carole Bradshaw lights another cigarette from the half-full pack she’d brought with her to the recital and brings Bradley out to the backyard so he can play and she can watch him. But before she lets him go, she looks down at him and says flatly, “If kids at school ask you about Uncle Tom and Uncle Pete—you need to tell them they’re just friends.”

And in his eyes, she can see the confusion of a little boy who hadn’t been aware that Tom Kazansky and Pete Mitchell were anything other than just friends—the confusion of a little boy learning about duplicity for the first time in his life. 

“Okay,” he says, so she lets him go.

—

[Maverick. 1998.]

“Don’t go easy on him,” Maverick hollers breathlessly over his shoulder, fishing around in the ice chest in the sand for two cans of Coors; “He just joined the J.R.O.T.C.; don’t go easy on him; he’s tougher than all your squadrons combined; beat him into the dirt…”

“Thanks, Uncle Mav,” shouts Bradley from across the volleyball court, where he’s getting initiated into one of the volleyball teams of younger fighter pilots. 

Maverick flashes him a thumbs-up and finds his T-shirt on the first bleacher bench, pulls it on with one hand, and then hops up the rest of the benches to sit with Ice, who’s got his CVN-65 ballcap on and a book open in his lap and is offering informal career advice to one of the other lieutenants: “Yeah, so, in my opinion, it’s all down to what you think you can stomach… If you want me to look over your C.V., I can totally do that—I think I’m free Monday at around thirteen-hundred, if you want to stop in to talk. Not a problem. Not a problem. Alright. See you later.” He watches the lieutenant go, then lolls his head over to look at Maverick, who’s tossing an ice-cold can of Coors up and down. “Hey. Good game. —Coors, Mav? This is an insult.” But he takes the offered can anyway, looking out onto the court, where Bradley—fourteen and just entering his beanpole phase of evolution—is currently spiking the ball. “Cool.” It’s a nice summer Saturday, a casual opportunity for the officers of Miramar to socialize with their families (Ice is wearing a golf shirt and jeans), and by now pretty much everyone knows that Maverick Mitchell’s raising his friend’s kid and that he and Captain Kazansky are good friends, so this is pretty nice. Not much to hide.

“C’mon,” Maverick says, popping open his own can, “you and I were having a scintillating conversation, a few minutes ago.” He’s hunting around for the sunscreen so the tops of his feet don’t burn to ashes in the sun.

“Scintillating. That’s a big word for you. Wow.”

“You’re rubbing off on me, Sir Reads-a-lot—”

“See, that’s funny,” Ice interjects, “because I seem to recall, before you so-rudely interrupted me to go play volleyball with the kids, I was telling you that it’s really not that interesting. It’s actually, Maverick, quite boring.”

“Well, I’m intrigued now. Go on. Finish it off, I wanna know.”

Ice slaps his book shut and gives the long tired sigh of a man who is very self-conscious about the fact that he’s about to turn forty. He pops the tab on his can of Coors and huffs in exasperation when it foams all over his hand. “I mean it, my family history’s really not that interesting. Typical eastern-European immigrant shitshow. U.S. officials change one letter in our last name and everyone loses their goddamn minds… Actually, that story might be apocryphal, I keep forgetting which former Soviet Socialist Republic I’m actually from, I just can’t remember, all the borders got redrawn so many times, one of ‘em…”

Maverick smiles and pulls his TOPGUN ballcap back down onto his head, tugs the brim down low over his eyes so he can tip his head back and not go blind from the summer sunshine. He’d thought Ice would be reluctant to share his family history, but it turns out that most people are just afraid to ask him, and he’s actually pretty eager to talk, if you just ask. Maybe over-eager. He’s rambling. Maverick cuts him off: “Yeah, you do have a left curve to you, don’t you. Genetic.”

The dirty joke strikes Ice dumb for a second, but then he forges ahead, wisely choosing not to engage. He keeps going, oblivious to the fact that Maverick’s not really listening… “Anyway, my grandfather was Jewish, but he died literally the second he stepped foot in America, so it doesn’t count…my grandmother was Orthodox, crazy story how they ended up together; actually, that story’s probably apocryphal, too…she’s the one who raised me, pretty much. I told you that. She brought my dad out to Southern California when he was a little kid, but I don’t know if you’ve noticed, So-Cal’s not exactly the Mecca of Orthodox churches or anything, so he wasn’t very religious at all… My mom was from Milwaukee, I think. Or maybe Minneappolis. Some kinda Protestant. Forget which kind. The preachy kind. But then she died and I didn’t have to go to church anymore, so I didn’t.”

“You just never believed?” Maverick mumbles, half-joking.

“Nah. I mean, I always had too many questions no one wanted to answer. For instance: okay, say you’re bad. Say you commit sin…”

“I’ve never sinned, sir. You’re talking hypothetically.”

“Right. Me, neither. Hypothetically speaking. So you go to Hell. Well, the devil’s there, too, ‘cause he’s a sinner, too. But why’s he want to punish you? What does he get out of it? You’re both in the same boat!”

“Probably a sexual thing,” says Maverick, watching the purple-green imprints of the sun dance around behind his eyelids. “He probably gets off on it. The devil, I mean.”

Ice laughs and laughs. “Sure. Try saying that in front of my mom and see if you survived. I learned pretty early on that they don’t want you to be too curious. So I kept all my questions to myself.” He’s also joking, not taking this super seriously, but that’s a pretty in-character answer. “What about you, Mav?”

“If I’ve told you my family’s history once, I’ve told you a thousand times…” That’s a joke. Maverick’s the one who doesn’t like talking about his family history. Ice hasn’t heard any of it, and for good reason. Maybe someday he’ll tell him about it. “Later. But, remember, I used to be Southern Baptist? Jesus, I was serious into that shit, Ice.”

Ice snorts. “Yeah, right. You.”

“Not joking. I had about eighty girlfriends between fourteen and eighteen, but that’s the most pious I’ve ever been. Lotsa loopholes to make my relationships biblical. Was thinking about being a youth pastor. —I’m not joking. It was my whole personality, for a while. Most of my childhood, anyway.”

Ice is still laughing in disbelief. “Oh, yeah? And then what happened?”

Maverick smiles. “…Got hooked on sinning.” 

“…Yeah,” Ice replies, and Maverick can hear the nervous smirk in his voice, “I guess I’d know a little something about that.”

And normally that would be the end of the conversation. But Maverick’s feeling a little sun-drunk, a little giddy, and he’ll never, ever, ever grow out of instigating stupid arguments with Ice just for the fun of it. From beneath the brim of his ballcap he mutters, “…You think Carole’s brainwashing her kid?”

Ice huffs a laugh, and says through a lazy yawn, “I’m not militant in my atheism, no.” But he, also, will never, ever, ever grow out of instigating stupid arguments with Maverick just for the fun of it, and his curiosity’s clearly been piqued. He stews in it for a second before he snaps, “Do you think Carole’s brainwashing her kid?”

“I’m just saying she has him readin’ outta the Bible, like, five times a day. She sends him to church camp. Does something to a kid.” He has no dog in this fight, but this is fun.

“And what did it do to you?” Ice says, reaching down to shove his shoulder good-naturedly. “Weren’t you just telling me not five seconds ago how you used to be the perfect model of Christian charity?” Maverick mumbles a retort sleepily; Ice pushes on through it: “Bradley’s a human being. Either he grows out of it like you did, or he doesn’t, in which case, whatever, land of the free. That’s the First Amendment. You swore an oath to the Constitution. Maybe you should read it.”

“I’ve read it. I’m not Congress, shithead. How’s it go, you want me to cite it to you directly, ‘Congress shall make no law…’ actually, I don’t know what comes after that. Got me there.”

“Don’t call me shithead, dipshit. And whatever. Good thing he’s Carole’s kid and not yours, then. He’s got a mom who wants him to go to church. It’s up to him if he wants to listen to her or not. That’s growing up.”

Maverick tips up the brim of his ballcap to look at him, sprawled out in the bleachers very unprofessionally for the CO of this entire volleyball court, and snaps back, “Well, he’s a little bit my kid. The same way he’s a little bit your kid.” 

Ice just flicks his sunglasses down onto his nose and purses his lips and neither confirms nor denies this allegation. 

They watch the game together for a while, Ice’s toes pressed against Maverick’s lower back discreetly, trying to work their way under Maverick’s T-shirt. Until one of the young pilots approaches a few minutes later: “Sir!” / “What’s that kid’s call sign again?” Ice mumbles to Maverick, prodding him with his foot. / “Hooker.” / “No shit.” / “Sir!” says Hooker again. / “Which one of us, kid?” says Maverick. / “Captain Kazansky, sir. We’ve got a spot opening up. Wanna play?”

Maverick looks up at Ice expectantly. Ice sighs and harrumphs and waffles for a minute— “I’m too old for this shit.”

“Sir,” says Maverick, “it’s not a competition, but if it were, I’d be winning.” 

Lighting the fire of competition under Ice like that is always a good strategy. He rolls his eyes, but immediately stands and tugs off his shirt and rolls up the cuffs of his jeans; “I’ll only play if I can play with the kid.” 

So Maverick watches the teams get scrambled again with a smile, and sits up to watch Ice join Bradley in the sand. Bradley’s only just now taller than Ice, and Ice clearly isn’t used to having to reach up to curl an arm around his shoulders to strategize, his eyes narrowed like an eagle’s, staring down the competition. Maverick can read his lips from across the pitch: Alright, kid, I’ve been watching for a while, and I think I know these guys’ strengths and weaknesses…okay, here’s what we’re gonna do… And the game begins when Bradley spikes the ball.

Ice won’t always be this fun, this down-to-earth, this human. The admiralty and the guilt and the grief of the years to come will strip it all away from him, bring him back to the cold, remove him from his own humanity. And maybe, even if it isn’t conscious, Maverick can recognize that, right now, watching Ice dive into the sand with a laugh: this summer sunshine is only temporary. It’s gonna have to end at some point. So he doesn’t take it for granted. He keeps his eyes open and watches and tries to commit it to memory.

And after the game, Ice and Bradley come over so Ice can finish his beer and put his shirt and his baseball cap back on, and Maverick can make fun of them for losing. And: “What were you guys talking about for so long before the game?” Bradley asks Maverick with a grin.

“Whether or not your mom’s brainwashing you,” Maverick says.

“Oh!” Bradley says mildly. “…No, I don’t think so!”

“Oh, that’s a great start,” Ice laughs. “You would’ve made a great Soviet. No, I don’t think I’m getting brainwashed. Hey, by the way, Gosling, if you want a beer, Maverick and I won’t tell anyone.”

“Aw, really?” whispers Bradley. “Thanks, Uncle Ice!” And he races down the bleachers towards the ice chest in the sand.

Maverick watches Ice watch him go, fingers still pinching the brim of his CVN-65 ballcap, clearly worrying about something the way Ice always is. 

Then he looks down at Maverick, stares openly for a minute, and says, “You don’t think we’re teaching him to rebel too much, do you?”

—

[Bradley. 2000.]

“Kiddo! You’re here early!” It was Uncle Ice, walking through his own front door, catching a glimpse of Bradley watching the Astros-Nats game on the TV. He was still in uniform, but smiling wide, and he set his bag down near the couch and leaned over to ruffle Bradley’s hair goodnaturedly.

“Practice ended early today.”

“Oh, okay. Cool. Maverick should be home soon, still at work—your mom’ll be here in about an hour—she told me to put the chicken breasts in the oven, but you know me, every time I use this oven I set off the fire alarm, so you oughta help me with that…”

“And,” Bradley said, watching Uncle Ice wash his hands in the kitchen sink, “I got here early because I wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh, sure!” chirped Uncle Ice. Then he paused, sensing a trap. “What about?”

“Advice,” Bradley mumbled. He took a deep breath, and stood to follow Uncle Ice into the kitchen “I was just—I was just curious. If you had any advice for me joining the Navy. You know, with me being gay, and all. How do I—I don’t know. I’ve been thinking about it a lot. It’s kinda been weighing on me. Do you have any advice?”

Uncle Ice was still drying his hands off on a kitchen towel. Rubbing them red and raw. And when he raised his head to speak, there was something dull and startled in his eyes: “I don’t, um—no, I don’t—I don’t know anything about that. —You should ask Uncle Maverick about that.”

“I did,” Bradley said desperately, because he had. Yes, he’d gone to Uncle Mav first. “He—he told me to talk to you.”

“…Oh,” said Uncle Ice, now standing in front of a shelf to return one of his books to it. This surprised him. Maybe hurt him a little. “No. I—I, I wouldn’t know anything about that.”

“But—”

“And there are probably better people to ask than me or Maverick. I—I don’t know—that’s not really my…I don’t know.”

“Okay.”

Uncle Ice swallowed, put the book back on the shelf, then clasped his hands together and set them on the shelf, too, as if leaning over his captain’s desk to chastise someone. He blinked for a long moment. Clearly shifting gears. Becoming someone else so easily. Why couldn’t Bradley do that? “But I can tell you this,” he said, and his voice had gone grave and dim, “and I know you and I don’t always see eye-to-eye on politics—but I can tell you this, professionally, because I respect you, and I care about you, a lot—you’re going to have to keep it a secret.”

Dismayed, Bradley said, “Why?”

“Why’s a funny question to ask about something like this,” said Uncle Ice curtly. He shrugged. “Why? Because it’s the law. That’s why.”

Bradley swung his bat at the hornets’ nest. This was always dangerous with Uncle Ice. “It shouldn’t be a law. Don’t you think?”

“Doesn’t matter what I think. It’s the law. And we get paid to enforce the law, internationally speaking. And the military doesn’t work if personnel refuse to follow the rules in broad daylight. So.” He trailed his fingertip along the spines of all his precious books, then eventually found a different one, started flipping through it absentmindedly. “And even if it weren’t the law, it’d still get enforced extrajudicially. You know what that means?” He did that, when he was intentionally being cruel; used big words that Bradley didn’t know to make himself sound smarter. “It means outside the law. The way people talk to you. The way people respect you or don’t respect you. And this business, the one you want to go into, is all about respect. Being a pilot is kind of like being a knight: you have to be noble, you have to be honorable, you have to respect your service and your adversaries and yourself. And because I respect you, and because I care about you a lot, I’m just telling you the truth—you’re going to have to keep it a secret.”

Bradley blinked. There was something crushing and overwhelming about the truth—maybe the fact that it was the truth, maybe the fact that he hated the fact that it was the truth. It made sense. But it also meant his future was unspeakably bleak. He tried to speak over the lump in his throat when he said, “Yeah. That’s what Maverick told me, too.” And what he’d wanted to hear from Uncle Ice was that Uncle Mav was telling a lie. 

Something went soft and slightly wounded in Uncle Ice’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” Uncle Ice said gently. “I wish I could give you better advice than that. But that’s all I know. I don’t know any more than that.”

“Don’t you want to know more than that?”

“No.”

And thus did the generational gap widen into a chasm. 

—

[February 2003.]

Dear SN Bradshaw, / Please call/email/write me back when you get a chance. / Love Uncle Iceman.

…

[August 2003.]

Dear AN Bradshaw, / I hope you’re doing all right. I hope at some point you and I can get in touch to talk. Please let me know if there is some other address I should be sending my letters to. I am not sure if they are finding you. / Love Uncle Iceman.

…

[May 2004.]

Dear AN Bradshaw, / I wanted to congratulate you on your acceptance to college. Yours is a very good AE program & you should feel very proud. Please let me know if there’s anything you might need as you prepare to start your first year. / Love Uncle Iceman.

…

[August 2010.]

Dear LT Bradshaw, / I wanted to let you know that I’ll be at NAS Oceana for a conference from December 6-9. I understand that’s your neck of the woods—would you be interested in having dinner with me on either that Tuesday or Wednesday night? I would love to hear how you’ve been doing. You can reach my secretary at the number below. / Love Uncle Iceman.

…

[October 2014.]

Dear LT Bradshaw, / We Maverick and I want to wish you a Happy Birthday 30th Birthday. We heard you are deployed out in the Atlantic now—we hope you will be able to enjoy the enclosed gift card when you make it back to terra firma. Our updated personal cell numbers are below. / HAPPY BIRTHDAY! FROM UNCLE MAVERICK & Uncle Iceman.

…

“Haven’t heard back from the kid yet.”

“…You think we ever will?”

The longest silence.

—

[Pacific Air Type Commander Beau Simpson. 2016.]

You could see it in the way they held themselves. An utmost similarity. Aristocratic propriety. Maybe a little sense of entitlement: look how hard we’ve worked to be here. All three of them had it. More accurately: Captain Mitchell and Admiral Kazansky both had it, and had passed it down to their son.

“Captain Mitchell.” Everyone was watching. The sun had only just set; the sky was melting from horizon-red through orange and yellow and teal up to midnight black above them.

“It’s an honor, sir,” said Captain Mitchell, accepting Admiral Kazansky’s handshake. God, you’d never know it by looking at them. Half the people here on this Roosevelt flight deck knew about them, but they were so convincing that more people weren’t sure. TYCOM Simpson glanced at Rear Admiral Bates, who glanced back in confusion—I thought they were…? They were, TYCOM Simpson signaled, just abnormally good at keeping it a secret.

“Honor’s all mine, Captain,” said Admiral Kazansky, and he passed by without a second glance.

And when he made it down the line of aviators to Lieutenant Bradshaw—you could see it. The similarity in the way they held themselves. Straight and rigid and unyielding. Cold and dismissive beyond belief, even to each other. Admiral Kazansky held out a hand. Lieutenant Bradshaw took it, but refused to make eye contact. Quiet rebellion under the radar: Admiral Kazansky had taught him well. 

TYCOM Simpson glanced at Captain Mitchell, to gauge his reaction. And for once, he and Captain Mitchell were clearly thinking the exact same thing.

Like father, like son.

You could see it in their stubborn determination. How far they were willing to go. How hard they were willing to push. How long they were willing to hold their own hands to the fire, if it meant the familiar painful comfort of staying warm. “Ice-cold, huh?” TYCOM Simpson asked him the next morning, trying to pin down their strategy, trying to secure a guarantee that their family would do what their country asked of them, even if that meant death. Even if that meant the ultimate sacrifice.

“Only when I have to be,” replied Admiral Kazansky, which meant always, and—soon thereafter, he ordered Lieutenant Bradshaw to his death.

But also, Lieutenant Bradshaw went willingly, too.

“Dagger One is hit.”

“Dagger Two is hit.”

Loss is supposed to hit a man in stages. Isn’t that the truth? —Not so for Admiral Kazansky, whom grief obviously swallowed whole in just an instant. He did not break, or bend under its weight. Just stood there staring at the E-2D AWACS screen with wide wounded eyes—not disbelieving eyes. They were gone. Captain Mitchell and Lieutenant Bradshaw were gone. He was in no denial whatsoever. He had leapt straight to acceptance.

“Sir,” said TYCOM Simpson hesitantly, and he reached out to touch him—the stars on his shoulder—guide him back to reality—what must it be like, to lose a son?—to willingly forfeit your family?—

But before he could make contact, Admiral Kazansky drew a breath, moved away, and closed his eyes for just a second. Perfectly composed, even with the waters of grief closing over his head, even with three dozen observers in this C2 room all scrutinizing him for his response. Perfectly composed. How did he do it? How could he manage? How was he possibly still this proud?

“Vice Admiral Simpson,” he said calmly, “I relinquish my command to you, until you deem me necessary to return to my post.”

“Sir,” said Rear Admiral Bates, darting panicked, sympathetic eyes to TYCOM Simpson, but it was too late—Admiral Kazansky was already leaving the room. Head held high and steady. 

Some confusing weeks later, after Captain Mitchell and Lieutenant Bradshaw returned from the dead, TYCOM Simpson and Rear Admiral Bates would casually debrief the mission together in the lobby bar of the Waldorf-Astoria in Washington, D.C. No hard liquor, just beers. Just barely enough alcohol to give them an excuse to philosophize. “You think pride is a sin or a virtue?” TYCOM Simpson found himself asking, tracing the rim of his gilt-edged Stella Artois glass with a finger, after having recounted the above testimony.

“Neither,” said Rear Admiral Bates. “Gotta be a vice.”

“A vice.”

“Yeah. Good men die because of pride, bad men die because of pride…we send our sons to battle because of pride…wars are fought and won and lost because of pride… every war in human history, when you boil it down, begins when someone says, ‘You’re wrong and I’m right, and I’m proud of my own righteousness, proud enough to kill, proud enough to die, proud enough to send my sons to die…’”

“Oh, okay. That’s the root of all human conflict, then, according to you, Warlock. Okay.”

Rear Admiral Bates smiled and laughed at himself, too. Pride, he mouthed. Then shook his head. “We’re a proud species. It’s our vice.”

TYCOM Simpson was thinking about the two proudest men he knew, Admiral Kazansky and Lieutenant Bradshaw, and wondered what it was, exactly, that had driven a wedge between them, you’re wrong and I’m right and I’m proud enough of my own righteousness to send you to your death/inflict my death upon you… And then he remembered the warnings he’d previously received about Lieutenant Bradshaw and Lieutenant Seresin and their open relationship, and then he remembered Admiral Kazansky coldly shaking Captain Mitchell’s hand… and he wondered if the wedge between them was exactly that: the matter of pride.

—

[Tom. 2018.]

“Merry Christmas and a happy new year, and all that,” says Pete, raising his glass and reaching over the dining table to clink rims with Tom and then Bradley. “A good year! A really good year! —Sorry your guy couldn’t be here, Rooster. We’ll call him tonight before you go. Tell him we miss him.”

“Where is he again?” Tom asks.

“Washington,” Bradley says with a smile. “Big conference at the Pentagon. I’ll see him next week.”

“You know,” Pete says with a sly grin directed at Tom, “I’ve never actually heard the story of how you two got together.” 

“Oh,” Bradley says, shrugging as he tears open a dinner roll, “not that interesting. Pretty much what you’d expect. Inter-squadron competition-turned-sexual tension. Not exactly within regs, but we did meet each other before D.A.D.T. got repealed, so it wasn’t like we’d’ve ever been within regs, either…” (All the while, Tom’s smirking over the rim of his wine glass at Pete, No, Mav, I’m not gonna tell him I had them reassigned to the same boat…) “We broke up when I got sent to TOPGUN. But we figured it out eventually.”

“Glad you did. Sorry he couldn’t be here.”

Bradley hesitates, then says, “You know what I just realized? I never heard how you two got together…! You’ve never told me that story!”

Tom glances over at Pete, do you want to take this or shall I, and when Pete motions all yours, he sighs and says, “Uh, we don’t really know. We’ve just been telling people nineteen-eighty-six because it’s easy. But in a much more real sense…” He thinks about it, then shrugs. “Whatever. If you really want to know. In nineteen-ninety-three, right after I came back to San Diego to take command at Miramar, he and I had a drunken one-night stand. By accident. Which then turned into twenty-five years of accidental one-night stands. So.”

“Oh, c’mon. You guys bought a house together.”

“Yeah, that,” says Pete, “that was, uh, to facilitate the accidental one-night stands. Make it more convenient for everyone.”

“Cut out the middle-man,” Tom supplies, then shrugs again at the look on Bradley’s face. “That’s our story, kid. It’s not super romantic. We weren’t thinking about it that way. We didn’t know how.”

Pete raises the wine bottle to refill Tom’s glass—though it’s still halfway full—and then raises his eyebrows when he “notices” the bottle’s empty. Changes the subject as he stands: “Okay, what’s everyone feeling? Red, white, what’s next?”

“Red,” Tom says absently. “Anything big, I guess—first cab you see…” But then he thinks about it, and he amends his order before Pete leaves earshot: “Actually—we’ve got that petite sirah we gotta drink—two-thousand-four. Israeli. Might be somewhere in the back, sorry. But now’s a good occasion, I think, to bust it out for the holidays. No reason to save it.”

“Israeli sirah two-thousand-four,” Pete repeats, “okay. I got that.” 

Then he steps outside, leaving Tom and Bradley alone. It’s not awkward—they’ve worked really hard over the last two years to make it not-awkward, after the mission—but human beings are human beings. Prideful, stubborn creatures. There will always be a little guilt between the two of them, and a little blame.

“I have to be honest,” Tom says after a moment, interested in being honest for Bradley’s sake, “sorry we don’t have a better story to give you, about us. It is a little hard to talk about.”

“Why?”

“Well—we don’t know the words we’re supposed to use, for one. It’s your generation who sets the standard for that kind of thing. You young people. We’re a little out-of-date. And…well. I guess we’re just jealous of you. It’s hard to talk about.”

“Jealous?” Bradley repeats quizzically. “Why?”

Tom leans back in his chair and really thinks through what he wants to say. This is one of those impromptu speeches you never really intend to make, but are probably still important to get off your chest. “Maverick and I,” he starts carefully, “will never stop feeling guilty about what we did to you. Ever. You need to know that.” And when Bradley scoffs and huffs and tries to interrupt, he goes on, “Not just pulling your papers from the Academy. It goes back further than that. We will always feel like we deprived you of your father. The merits of that feeling are debatable, sure, but it’s a fact of life. A fact of our lives, anyway. And it’s dictated so much of how we live, and how we’ve lived, over the past thirty years. Part of the reason I came back to Miramar in nineteen-ninety-three was to be with you and your mom. Because I felt I owed you that, in return for what I’d taken.”

“You didn’t kill him,” Bradley says. “Or, at least, I never blamed you for killing him. You or Maverick both. You guys were my dads. You didn’t take anything from me. —Excepting the obvious, the Academy, but that was mostly my mom, I guess, so, whatever.”

“I’m just telling you what our lives have been like since the day I met you. Why we did what we did.”

“Okay. But I still don’t understand why you’re jealous.”

Tom smiles, a little faintly. “Because the other part of the reason I came back to Miramar in nineteen-ninety-three was to be with Maverick,” he says, “and I’m jealous of you because I didn’t recognize that at the time. —Everyone hopes, when they have kids—because, look, I’m not your dad, but you are my kid, really—everyone hopes they can bring their kid into a better world than the one they had when they were a kid, and we did. But no one prepares you for how jealous you get when your kid grows up in a better world than you did. I’m not sure people your age understand how hard it was for us when we were your age.”

“I do.”

“Sure, but I don’t think you do. I—I didn’t…” He sighs. “I never meant to fall in love with Mitchell. He never meant to fall in love with me. There certainly were men in relationships in the Navy back then who could make it work—we weren’t those guys. We looked down on those guys. Most people did. And when you were an officer, your job security and your paycheck relied on your subordinates’ respect for you. If we’d rocked the boat, traded away our respect for our relationship, well, we’d have each other, but we’d be out of a job. And then, if we’d been fired—what did we kill all those people for? For nothing! What a waste of all the lives we took! It wouldn’t have been honorable. Would’ve disrespected the Navy, our careers, the men we killed. So we didn’t talk about our relationship. You know that. Didn’t talk about who we were, or what we were doing, or why, because we were afraid of losing our own honor. Didn’t talk about it until the day you two died and came back from the dead. That’s what it took. Maverick still hates talking about some of that stuff, all the labels, all the words—that’s why I sent him to get a bottle at the back of the fridge, he might be out there a while…”

“Cunning,” Bradley says softly, but leaves the space open after he speaks.

Tom looks away. “Maybe this is getting too deep into the weeds. I’m just trying to tell you what it’s been like for us. Not sure how much of this you want to hear.”

“All of it. —All of it.”

Tom clears his throat. “…Well, Maverick keeps trying to convince me that we never wasted any time. And I know there is some truth to that—we didn’t start out liking each other at all—even if we’d been as brave as people your age are nowadays, even if we’d been open with each other about that kind of stuff, we still probably wouldn’t have ended up together. I mean, we really didn’t like each other. Especially right after your dad died, and especially after you left, in two-thousand-two. So maybe it was better for us in the long run that we didn’t talk about it. But I look back on the thirty years I’ve spent with him, and…it still all feels like a waste to me.” Maybe he really is too deep into the weeds. But he just wants Bradley to understand. “Look, Mitchell is, beyond any possible shadow of a doubt, the love of my life. Always has been and always will be. Right? —I just wish I’d known that at the time. I’m jealous of you because you’re exactly the age I was when I came back to Miramar to be with you and your mom and Maverick, and you’re already married, and you won’t ever have to sacrifice any of your honor for your marriage. You’re one of the most respected men in the Navy.”

“So are you, Ice, and you’re also married to another man.”

“I’ll remind you, though it hurts a little, that I’m almost exactly a quarter-century older than you, and you and I got married within a week of each other. I had to wait for times to change.” He holds Bradley’s gaze for a moment, then finishes the last of his dinner and sets his fork down on his plate. “So, if you were ever wondering why Mav and I are a little bitter around you and Jake, well, it’s because we are.”

“Oh,” says Bradley. “See, I always thought it was just because you and Maverick are both notoriously bitter people.”

“We are,” Tom admits through a laugh. Then he continues, “But—you should also know how proud of you we both are. How proud of you we’ve both always been. We’re not very brave men—well, we are, of course, but maybe not in the way that matters. It’s pretty gratifying to have a kid who’s braver than you are. Every parent’s dream, whether we want to admit it or not. You’re brave enough for all of us.”

It’s at this moment that Pete opens the garage door and sticks his head inside and hollers, “Ice, I can’t find it. What about a merlot? Can we do a merlot?”

“No, baby, the sirah,” Tom answers without turning his head. “It’s on the second shelf, you might—have to rearrange some of the bottles—we have too much wine. We need to drink more, me and you.”

“Not a problem,” says Pete, and he shuts the door again.

“It’s on the third shelf,” Tom tells Bradley in an aside. “He’ll find it eventually. He would’ve tried to change the subject six times by now. —The previous Secretary of the Army—he actually just got married this week, I think; I need to send a card—also gay. He and his partner invited Maverick and me out to dinner the last time we were in D.C. Most uncomfortable I’ve ever seen Mav in my whole life. Asking us questions like, ‘How did you guys get together…?’ ‘Was it easier for you guys because you were in the Navy…?’ ‘When did you…know…?’” When Bradley laughs, Tom does, too. It’s really nice, it turns out, to joke about this stuff with someone who understands. “We just made our answers up out of thin air. I was uncomfortable too, admittedly. That’s what I’m saying. Mav and I never learned the vocabulary to answer questions like that.”

Bradley starts taking their plates to the sink. What a good kid. “You know,” he says from the kitchen, glancing over his shoulder when Tom joins him at the counter, “it’s so funny you bitch that you and Mav don’t have a romantic love story, or whatever. When I was a kid, you and him were literally the pinnacle of romance.”

“Oh, really.”

“Yeah. There’s something romantic about the secret, too. When Jake and I made our relationship official—the first time—I begged him to keep it a secret just for a little while. You know; it was sexy, for a few minutes! Something only he and I knew!”

“And you immediately discovered how awful it is, I’m sure,” Tom says noncommittally. “I’m jealous of you that you learned that lesson young. —Yeah, real romantic. Maverick and I could’ve ended each other’s careers fourteen thousand times over. Real romantic.”

“And trusted each other not to,” Bradley points out—

—which makes Tom reconsider. 

Yeah, okay, maybe it’s a little romantic. The way Grimm’s fairytales, once you wipe away all the blood, are just a little romantic. “I’m of the opinion that the only thing getting old is good for is looking back on your life through rose-colored glasses. Sure. Historical revisionism it is. It was a little romantic.”

“What’s a little romantic?” says Pete, stepping into the kitchen and triumphantly brandishing his 2004 petite sirah; “Have I missed something funny? —It was on the third shelf, by the way. Could’ve told me that before I went and reorganized the whole fridge.”

Tom graciously accepts the half-annoyed kiss to the cheek, and answers, “Nothing you would’ve laughed at, I’m afraid.”

“Oh, one of those conversations,” says Pete, hunting around in the drawer for the corkscrew. “If you were planning on continuing, I can go out and rearrange the wine bottles by region instead of by year—” and scoffs when Tom kisses him back to reassure him, conversation’s over.

“Did you know,” Bradley says, “your husband is now openly calling you the love of his life?”

“Oh, yeah,” says Pete with a smile, popping the cork from the bottleneck, “he tells me that all the time. Nothing new.” Tops up their glasses, then deftly changes the subject: “Oh, gosh. I never asked. This is the big news. How are you and Hangman enjoying SOUTHCOM?”

“Oh, God,” says Bradley, rolling his eyes. “Let me tell you…”

“I think we did good,” Pete says later that night—they’re alone now, so he’s fine talking—as he tugs loose the tucked sheets to clamber into bed, and when Tom moves to turn off the light he adds, “No, you can keep reading.”

Tom sets his book down onto his chest and pulls his glasses off anyway. “Well, you and I are known for doing ‘good,’” he muses after a second. “We’re pretty universally renowned for being good at stuff. But, regarding what in particular? —Raising our kid?”

“Yeah. We did good.”

Actually, they didn’t do very well at all. But of course that’s not what Pete means. Pete means: it’s shocking and stunningly fortunate that they did as poorly as they did and still somehow ended up with such a good kid. Tom’s looking up at the ceiling and feeling very small. “How did that happen? Genuinely, how did that happen? I did always build getting married into my plan for my life—but I never thought far enough ahead to consider having kids. And now you and I have a kid who’s in his thirties. How’d that happen? I remember when he could barely walk!”

Pete yawns and rolls over onto his side and closes his eyes. “You and I have a kid who earned a Medal of Honor.”

“I know exactly how that happened” —and doesn’t like to think about it too much. “I suppose we’re just a family of overachievers. A lot of failing upwards, you and me. Somehow we failed our way upwards into a very happy lifelong relationship, a superstar kid…a few dozen medals each, ourselves…”

“That’s life,” says Pete sleepily.

“That is not most people’s lives. You’re aware that our lives look nothing like the average person’s life, right? You understand that?”

“That’s our life.”

Tom considers this. Yeah, it is their life. Wild how that happens. 

He smiles at the singular word life, sets his book on the nightstand, presses a kiss to Pete’s bare shoulder, and turns off the light.

[sturnioloshacker]

truth or dare - a chris sturniolo short

a/n: requested by anon; lowercase intended

summary: a game of truth or dare leads to a crush confession

the air was filled with laughter and exposed secrets as we all sat in a circle for game night. chris, matt, nick, madi, nate and i all decided to play a classic game of truth or dare. as the bottle spun, our nerves heightened and our deepest, darkest secrets were waiting to be revealed. the bottle slowed in speed, passing nick, passing madi and landing on me. crap.

“oh, y/n!” madi says in a sing-song voice.

“yeah?”

“will you tell the truth or shall i dare you to expose yourself?” she asks, as a mischievous grin spreads across her face.

i hesitated, glancing nervously at chris, who was sitting opposite me. i’ve had the biggest crush on chris since we first met at a movie premiere. nobody knows about this crush except for madi. i feel everyone’s eyes on me as they wait for me for my answer. 

“dare," i finally said, trying to mask my anxiety.

madi's eyes gleamed with mischief. oh no, she better not!

“i dare you to tell us who your crush is."

the room fell silent as everyone turned their attention to me. i feel my cheeks flush and my body go numb. she really went there. my heart races as i feel the panic rush through my body like an adrenaline rush, and without a word, i stand and bolt from the room, leaving everyone else stunned. 

“um. i think i messed up,” madi says, breaking the awkward silence.

“should someone go and see if she’s okay? i feel bad for her,” nate speaks up.

“i’ll go and check on her,” chris says, getting up from his spot and going to find me.

“and off the crush goes!” 

“madi!” nick yells.

“i’m going to shut up now as i'm a terrible bestie.”

i hear a faint knock against the bathroom door. hearing chris’s voice, my heart skips a beat. how did he find me so fast? i quickly wipe my tears to hide the evidence that i was crying from embarrassment and open the door. chris comes in and notices my rosy cheeks and watery eyes.

“have you been crying?”

i nod in shame and hang my head low as i feel more tears threatening to spill. chris pulls me into his embrace, rubbing my back as i softly sob into his chest. he pulls away and takes me by the hand to lead me into his bedroom. 

“so, um, madi kinda exposed you even more just before by saying that i’m your crush. is that true?”

“yeah. yeah it is. i just couldn’t say it in front of everyone, including you.”

“why? matt said his and nate said his. you know you can trust us, right?” chris smiled gently.

“i’m just scared that you don’t feel the same way and i didn’t want to say anything so i panicked because i didn’t think you’d like me the way i like you.”

chris held my hands and he looked right into my eyes. i feel his thumbs run along my hands, bringing me at ease. i watch as he leans in, his face coming within inches of mine. he closes the gap between us and i instantly feel fireworks go off in my stomach. the kiss is soft and passionate, like he’s been wanting to do this for so long. i smile into the kiss, slowly deepening it as i remove my hands from his and wrap them around his neck. i pull away and touch our foreheads together, the spark between us feeling so real.

“i like you, y/n, so much. i’ve had a crush on you for a while now too.”

“really?”

“really.”

i close the gap between us again, this time the kiss is more passionate and fiery, our tongues colliding as we fight for dominance. chris wins as he pushes me against the bathroom sink. the kiss is so addicting, it’s like a drug. i just can’t seem to stop myself. i feel chris’s hands slide down my waist and to my bum, giving it a slight squeeze, making me jump. our heated makeout session is interrupted for a loud screech.

“what’s this?! oh my god!” matt yells in excitement as he finds his brother and myself pressed up against each other.

the other three come rushing to find us up against one another, our hair all messed up and clothes wrinkled. cheers and screams sounded off as we all crushed into a big group hug. 

“i’m not a terrible bestie anymore! from now on, you can call me madi the truth or dare matchmaker.”

we all laugh at madi’s comment before heading back downstairs to continue where we left off. sitting back in our original positions, we continue our game.

“so, y/n. i dare you to tell us who your crush is.”

“my crush is christopher owen sturniolo and i like him so much.” i proudly say with my chest.

i’m met with “awww” and “oooh” before we all burst into laughter. truth or dare continues into the night, from lap dances to kisses to exposing naughty secrets. i glance over at chris and we make eye contact. smiling, he gestures for me to come over to his side. i sneakily make my way over and he pats his lap. i slowly place myself in his lap and his arms immediately wrap around my waist, his head leaning on my shoulder. i spend the rest of the game in chris’s lap, kissing him and leaning against him. 

[imjustwritingg]

Other than wanting to wrap Hailey in cotton wool and give her the biggest hug, how are you feeling/what are your thoughts after last nights episode?

This turned into an unofficial review of sorts and it got rather long, so I’ll post it all below the cut for those that want to read my thoughts.

I might be in the minority here, but I really enjoyed the episode. I kinda loved it actually, and it might be one of my favorite episodes. I enjoyed everything about it…the writing, the directing, the acting.

Gwen Sigan wrote the episode, but I gotta give her credit where it’s due because it was pretty damn good in my book. It reminded me a lot of her writing days prior to her becoming show-runner and I miss those days so very much.

I think the tidbits of Hailey’s past are coming way too late, but I still really enjoyed getting to peek into her life a bit more. Just wish we could have gotten more of it along the way and not three episodes before the character is gone.

I loved Kevin’s blatant callout to Hailey in the first minute of the episode of how she’s dealing and if running is helping her. He asks this question of “how are you doing…really doing?” with no words and just one look, and then we’re given the answer by Hailey deflecting and avoiding yet again under the guise of wanting a sugar fix. I think that was brilliant. It conveyed everything you needed to know about Hailey’s mental state in one short moment.

No Voight in the episode was such a gift.

Hailey being in charge and leading this particular case was the right move and she handled it so well. I’m bummed we probably won’t see her leading her own unit someday.

Also back to the no Voight thing just for a moment to say that it’s interesting to see how the dynamic shifted with the team versus him not being around and Hailey being in charge. The team felt lighter to me, like in the sense that they weren’t on edge, walking on eggshells in a way. Everything just felt calmer. There was still an intensity and an urgency to solve the case, but rules were followed, there was no off the book cowboy bullshit, and it felt like everyone followed Hailey and trusted her, whereas with Voight they were obeying orders that were barked out to them. I don’t know. It just felt really different and so very satisfying to me.

I love Kevin and Kim’s ability to communicate with one another with just one look between them. Makes me think of the early days of them being partners and being on patrol. They still work so wonderfully together.

This case was sick. A mother doing that to her own child is demented. Where these writers, and Gwen specifically, come up with these ideas is beyond me, but someone should probably do a wellness check on her. Like girly needs some serious therapy and R&R.

Josephine Petrovic. I had some hesitation with her at first as you usually do with a new character as you try and suss them out, but I’ve gotta say, I like her. I like her and I hate that I like her and I hate that she only just came onto the show because I would love to see what happens with her if she were to stick around, but I can’t watch this show without Tracy or Jesse — mostly Tracy — but neither of them? I just can’t do it. I have some other thoughts on Jo, but I will save them for another ask I received.

I obviously saved the elephant in the room for last…Jay. I really don’t think the mentions and nods to him in this episode were “bad” in any way because it’s stuff that has already been said about the character…Gwen’s version of him at least, but I do think there is a reason why he is being brought up and why there are so many nods to the marriage. Hailey insisted she wasn’t angry with him in the premiere. She signed the divorce papers, sent them off, and that was that and she washed her hands of him. Except she didn’t. Because she is angry, she hasn’t moved on in the year and a half he’s been gone now, signing the papers didn’t give her any closure…hell, even him signing the papers didn’t give her any closure, (I will die on the hill that he only signed them because it’s what he thought she wanted). I personally do not think she will get any closure whatsoever if she doesn’t have a conversation with him, if she doesn’t confront him and all of it head on…the anger and resentment and confusion and the love that is still there. You can’t turn that shit off. You can’t just push it away and be like, “okay, I’m done with you now, goodbye.” Life doesn’t work that way. Emotions don’t work that way. Grief sure as shit doesn’t work that way, and I feel like that is the stage Hailey is stuck in right now. Grieving the loss of Jay and her marriage and stuck in a limbo that she doesn’t know how to navigate on her own while dealing with childhood trauma that she actually isn’t really dealing with at all. And she is without a doubt on her own. That is the one thing that has been made clear this season. She has no family, not any friends other than co-workers, and right now, she doesn’t have Jay. I respect the “independent woman, gonna stand on my own, I don’t need anyone” mindset, but I don’t agree with how we got here and I also don’t fully agree with the notion that she doesn’t need anyone because everyone needs someone. You can’t do life alone. You need someone in your corner, someone by your side, someone who gets you in ways you don’t even know yourself, and for Hailey, that person is and will always be Jay Halstead. I think she will realize she needs to get out of Chicago like her brothers, like Jay, like Will, and I hope that wherever she ends up, Jay is there waiting for her and the two of them can just start over without Chicago and their past looming over them like a dark cloud. And for the love of God, let them both go to therapy…together and separately.

Brenna Malloy directed and it was just…perfect. True cinema if you will. The close-ups of the actors’ faces during certain scenes and how the camera would pan to them at just the exact right moment for a reaction, the no background noise and intentional pauses during scenes that allowed moments to feel heavier and more real, the ending shot of Hailey and her teary eyes…I feel like it was a story that was so delicately handled and crafted by Brenna, and I’m just really impressed.

Tracy Spiridakos. I mean, what more even needs to be said? The woman is a powerhouse. It always amazes me knowing how much of a goof she is on set and then you watch an episode like this and it’s just like…WOW. Her range of emotion and the way she makes you feel every single one of those emotions is truly something that needs to be studied. You cry with her, you smile with her, you laugh with her, but the biggest thing is you feel for her character, and I think that is something that not all actors are capable of doing with an audience. Tracy knocks it out of the park, across the highway, into the next town every time, and her execution is consistent every time as well. No one is doing it like her, and I love and respect the hell out of that woman and her talent.

I think the same also needs to be said for Bojana Novakovic. I have been surprisingly impressed by her and kind of adore her. I’ve really been enjoying the character of Josephine Petrovic and I hate that she’s only coming into the show now right when Tracy is walking out the door because Bojana alone is incredible, but her and Tracy together? It’s like magic to me. Their chemistry as scene partners and the way they bounce off each other is absolutely insane, and then their ability to pull you in and keep you locked in…ooof. I think it’s something special and I’ve really enjoyed seeing them together on-screen.

As for how I feel…

I feel good? Okay? The episode didn’t do much for me in the grand scheme of “what is Hailey gonna do” or “what’s gonna happen” because we already anticipated her leaving Chicago. That wasn’t ever in question. But the actual reason for Hailey leaving is still muddled to me, even more so because she hasn’t resolved anything in her life. She still has these demons, a past filled with trauma she hasn’t found peace with, she has no closure with Jay, she has questions and zero answers, and she is already and literally running from her problems.

So, is she supposed to leave Chicago and start over somewhere and her problems are just gonna go poof? Magically disappear? Because that’s not how that works, and I think that would be yet another injustice to the character and more lazy writing. I do think the episode (finally!) laid the groundwork for Tracy’s exit, but it should have started in episode 1, not 10. Tracy gave them an entire season to wrap up Hailey’s story, and I feel like they wasted so much time and it’s gonna be another rushed exit once the curtain falls. It’s not that I’m surprised in that regard, but I am disappointed (again!) especially considering how much of a fuss Gwen made about “it’s so generous of Tracy to give us a whole season.”

If Gwen’s plan was to make Hailey’s exit about her family and her childhood trauma then the seed should have been planted long before now, and Jay shouldn’t still be a sore subject for her. I think we’re in for a really emotional ending to the season, not just for Hailey, but for the first time since season eight I’m actually looking forward to a finale again.

In conclusion and a very long story short…I loved the episode, but Gwen Sigan is still on my shit list.

[lovelytsunoda]

crying over it all // clement novalak

summary: there are few things in this world more mortifying than failing your drivers test when everyone else your age has a license. it’s made even worse when your boyfriend is a racing driver

pairing: clement novalak x female reader

warnings: reader fails her driving test, which leads to significant self loathing, clem is just trying to be supportive and god I need someone like him right now

authors note: guess who failed her drivers test 🙃 I’ve rebooked it but now I have to commute by way of three buses to my college campus :( and don't even get me started on field placement...i wish i had never left it this long but at this point i need to trust to process and find some sort of way to move past it.

“I’m sorry, but you will need to retake your road driving test. I understand that’s not what you wanted to hear, but you need some more practice. you can see the full list of mistakes inside.”

it had been twenty minutes since she’s heard those words, and she still felt shaky on her feet. her hands had shook and tears fell down her face as she went inside, taking a number and waiting in a notoriously long dmv line to admit to the woman at the desk that she needed to rebook her test.

she didn’t want clement to see her like this, utterly defeated and trying not to scream her lungs out as she watched four teenagers in line in front of her get their licenses.

she was twenty one, for god sakes. she should have been driving by now.

she was sitting on the wooden bench, slouched I gracefully and letting the tears fall as she played with her car keys when clement found her.

what was the point of even owning a fucking car if she couldn’t drive it?

“oh, love." clem frowned, feeling his own stomach sink when he saw how distraught she was. "i take it that things didn't go well."

"could you tell?" she sobbed, trying to wipe her eyes. "was it that obvious? i hate myself, clement. how is it that i can't do something that pretty much everybody my age has been able to do since they were sixteen."

his heart ached as he heard her words. he'd passed his test on the first try, and he drove things for a living, so he's never really thought about what it must have been like for her, having to bum rides off her friends and family or to be bound to the transit schedule. while she was in college, it hadn't been the biggest deal, although it was a minor inconvenience. now that she would be working full time, the stakes were higher.

"i'm sorry, pretty girl." he frowned, pulling her closer, allowing her rest her head on his shoulder. "but you can take it again, and you know what you did wrong, right?"

"i start work next week, clem. i've looked up the commute and if i take public transit, it's almost two hours each way. and i feel like i'm a burden by constantly asking people for rides, or telling them that if they can't pick me up, we can't hang out. hell, my mother had to drive to my first date with you!"

clem chuckled at the memory, the image of a frazzled y/n stepping out of her mother's suv and frantically scanning the parking lot for clement. moments later, her mother had insisted to getting out of the car and introducing herself to clem. y/n thought that she would combust then and there.

"your mother loves me!"

"yeah, but imagine being a grown-ass adult and still having to get your mother to drive you to appointments because you don;t want to chance the bus route not aligning with your appointment time? i feel like my grandmother, and she's ninety, clement. she had her license revoked because she has cataracts."

"i know it hurts right now, but you are never a burden, y/n. your friends love having you in the car when they drive. hell, i feel like i drive better when you're next to me. i don't mind driving you places, you know. it means that i get to spend more time with you."

she smiled at the gesture, turning to allow clem to cup her chin and wipe some of her tears away. her face was flushed, eyes red and puffy. she couldn't shake the idea that she might have made a scene inside the testing center.

"i know. i just wish i could be more independent. transiting gives me so much fucking anxiety. i went over the curb when i three=point-turned and an old lady on a mobility scooter started yelling at me."

"but you never go over the curb."

"exactly! i think i was nervous, when i practiced the route with my dad, there were never any cars on the road. and i think after that happened, i got into my head and it screwed everything else up. i'm such a fuck up. i feel like i've let everybody down, especially you, since you helped pay for my fucking car."

'"hey, hey, don;t talk like that. you'll get it. i promise you. you know jenson button didn't pass his road test on his first try, right?"

she snorted, sitting up straighter, but still clutching clem's hand. "did he really?"

"yeah, and i think lando failed as well."

"yeah well, i've seen how lando drives. that doesn't surprise me at all."

having a laugh seemed to help, and at least now if people mwere staring at her it was because of the f2 driver sitting next to her, not because she was a grown woman who still couldn't drive and decided to cry about it, and then fling her keys onto the grass.

"i have some plans i might have to move around, and then i need to call my parents, and then my dad can take me out to practice a bit more but i have to trust that when i take it again in october, something goes right. because i know exactly what i fucked up."

she moved to get up from the bench, clm following closely behind as she shamefacedly handed him the keys to her volkswagen. well, the volkswagen now, since she couldn't drive it without someone who'd had their license for five years present.

"i'm proud of you for trying. i know that this was something you put off for a long time because of your anxiety, and even though it didn't work out, at least you tried." clem encouraged, his arms comfortably slung around her shoulders as she laced her fingers with his. "hey, it could be worse. you could have had your dad drive you here."

"clement, don't even joke!" she laughed. "you know that i hate taking transit, and that i don't always feel safe going places alone."

"i know. and if you ever feel unsafe, or too anxious to function, or just like you want to see my gorgeous face, call me. as long as im in the country, i will come and get you. and if im not, i'll send someone i trust."

"like who? max fewtrell? his driving is worse than landos."

clem snorted. "i meant ria. or pietra.

"thank you, clement." she sighed, leaning into him as he unlocked the car. "i love you."

"i love you more, pretty girl." he kissed the top of her head softly. "it will all work itself out, love. just you wait. and then you'll be the one driving me places."

TAGS:

@httpiastri @magnummagnussen @oconso @thatsdemko @scuderiamh @libraryofloveletters @diorleclerc @sidcrosbyspuck @cartierre @clemswrld @love4lando

[kitthepurplepotato]

Chapter 16 - A deep conversation

Summary: Deku’s worries float away with Rody’s surprise visit. Literally.

Izuku’s lips get loose after a few pints. (It was one single pint, but don’t tell him I told you that.)

Warnings: mentions of depression, really brief mention of suicide but I swear it’s a cute, fluffy chapter! 😂 also… alcohol. Drink responsibly. Don’t be a Deku.

First Chapter Master List

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“Rody?!” Izuku shrieks, completely dumbfounded.

You can’t help but smile fondly as Rody hugs Izuku and starts muttering death threats into his ears.

“If you ever pull that shit again, I’ll come over on my helicopter and kill you myself, you fucking asshole. You understand, buddy?” Rody mumbles while Pino cries on Izuku’s shoulders, snuggling into his hair. Izuku was right. Rody has the most interesting quirk you’ve ever seen.

“I’m so happy to see you, buddy.” Izuku sniffs because that’s who he is; if an emotion is even a tiny bit stronger than his normal, he cries about it, positive or negative. Rody rolls his eyes, but Pino still cries a river. Honestly, this guy a perfect example of how different humans act in front of of others. It’s mesmerizing. And sad. “I have so much to tell you, oh my god! You know how I got a roommate thanks to Jirou? She’s so pretty and so sweet, Rody, I fell in love with her right away, she’s also a big fan of me and …”

“Izuku, I’m here. I can hear you.” You giggle as Izuku starts to blush aggressively. “Why don’t you have this conversation with him after eating something? You can have a cider or a beer in the garden?”

“What about you?” Izuku gives you his biggest puppy eyes. Rody laughs fondly at your shenanigans.

“Oh boy, you have it bad.”

“Oh boy, he really does.” You giggle to yourself with a slight blush on your face. “I need to finish my commissions, Izu. I’ve been neglecting it in the past few days.” Izuku looks so heartbroken; he’s little libs wobble, his eyes are full of tears and… fuck, you are way too weak against his puppy eyes. “Okay, I’ll leave you two alone for an hour, then I’ll join. But let’s eat first. Rody must be hungry.” You sigh as Izuku attacks you with kisses on your cheeks, because this guy has no shame.

“I guess I don’t need to ask how the rest of the story went.” Rody gives you a knowing smile. Izuku is abssolutely out of it, literally floating around from the happiness. Floating. Like, for real. By the time he makes it into the kitchen he head bumps into the ceiling.

“Wow, are you sure you are not in love with Rody? You haven’t kissed the ceiling before.” You tease your man who only moans, incapable of getting down by himself. “I’ll get the ladder, you keep him away from the window.”

“Yes, sir!” Rody smirks.

You have no idea what’s happening, but one thing is for sure; you haven’t laughed this much in your whole fucking life. You really thought Izuku can not surprise you anymore, but clearly, you have a long way to go before you actually get to know this man. Thank god you have your whole life to get to know him.

~•🥦•~

“So…” Izuku scratches his head awkwardly as he comes back from the bedroom. He decided to call his doctor, just in case. “Apparently, my floating might be the after effect of my meds. The ones I got for my mood.”

“So you got overexcited like those puppies who pee themselves when they see their owner?” Rody chimes in with a smirk on his face. You swear you heard his tummy rumble, but you decide not to mention it yet.

“Basically, yes. I got some meds to lift my mood but I didn’t really need to take them today but I took it out of habit, then… a lot of good things happened and… yeah.”

“Well, at least you didn’t pee yourself.” You tease, tapping the seat next to you with a fond smile. “Come on puppy, Rody is starving.” You giggle as Izuku puts his pretty little bum down on the seat. Rody is so fucking ready to eat it’s actually quite hilarious; you don’t need Pino’s help to know he will devour whatever you put in front of him, even if it tastes like shit (hopefully, it does not.)

Just as expected, Rody jumps on the food right as you pop the serving in from him; you brought a little bowl over for Pino as well, not entirely sure if she eats human food or not, but you definitely did not want her to feel left out. You also brought over some seeds Izuku kept for the birds in his garden, just in case.

“I hope you payed for your ride this time.” Izuku looks at his friend with suspicion. You have no idea why this is the first question that comes out of your boyfriend’s mouth, but there is probably a story behind it.

“Yes and no.” Rody answers honestly and you can see Izuku’s frown deepen at that. “Wait! Jesus, just because I haven’t payed for a bus ride doesn’t mean I’m going to sneak on a fucking plane! That’s actual crime, Izuku!”

“Not paying for a bus ride is also a crime, Rody!” Izuku retorts. At this point, you are just blinking at the two, utterly confused.

“I haven’t payed for the ride itself, because I was the pilot. Your bestie, Katsuki, was nice enough to let me park at your agency’s helipad.” Rody admits. “Some of my friends wanted to visit Japan anyway and as you know, I work at a private jet charter company, so… they chipped in. Every pilot is allowed to use the planes once a year for personal reasons, I usually use mine to take my siblings away from the city but after I heard what happened from Katsuki, I decided to come over.”

So he was worried. That’s so sweet!

“Why didn’t you bring Roro and Lala over?!” Izuku pouts. Rody only laughs at that.

“They have school. They are big enough now to stay alone for a week but I asked my girlfriend to stay over at our house, just in case. They are probably having the time of their lives without me.”

“Your girlfriend?!” Izuku shrieks, almost choking on his soup. You gave him a proper bowl this time because you didn’t want him to feel like a kid in front of his buddy but he still managed to look like one, so all your efforts were in vain.

“Yeah, uhm…” Rody and Pino’s face reddens. “She’s works at the company. Super cute. I had a crush on her since day one. Then we went out drinking together with the guys and uhm… yeah. It’s not too romantic but we haven’t left each other’s side since. Life is great, you know… and I can only thank you for that. You opened my eyes and made me realize I can live a proper life and get money in a respectful way. I wouldn’t be here without you, you know. So thank you. I will bring my siblings over next year. They also want to thank you.”

Needless to say, Izuku cries again. Then he floats. Everyone screams. Thankfully, you manage to grab him before the whole table flips.

~•🥦•~

“Life has been hectic. I don’t… I don’t know what’s going to happen, you know. With my career, I mean. I might lose my spot… hell, I probably will.” Izuku mutters, playing with the condensation on his almost empty glass.

Saying that Izuku is okay now is an overstatement. The last few weeks were terrible. Everything felt empty, like he’s only a shell, an empty vessel with needs and desires, but they all felt so distant, so fake, he had to force himself to actually eat and shower. It was a struggle to keep himself alive, especially in the first week. The pain was excruciating, being unable to move was frustrating the hell out of him and not even the hot bubble bath and the massive amount of medicine could soothe his troubled soul and broken body. He hurt the most important person in his life, daily, he made Sweet Pea cry every night; he could hear it sometimes, barely there but loud enough for him to notice during the sleepless nights. He has so much atoning to do, so much to make up for but he also needs to heal so he can save people again and it’s really hard to find the perfect middle ground. He’s so happy but he’s also not… it’s like he’s in the pink clouds, but with weights pulling his legs down and he needs to work hundred times harder with to stay up there while before it was easy as breathing. Izuku wants to be his old self, he really wants to; he misses his old, silly self, or to be exact, he misses when he didn’t feel dread after every laugh, thinking that be should be out on the field, fighting instead of having fun with his girlfriend. Izuku knows this is something every hero needs to go through at least once; All Might himself told him he also felt the same when he had to retire, this constant guilt and dread every time he dared to feel happy about something. It’s normal but it doesn’t make it easier to endure.

“Does she know?” Rody gives Izuku a sad smile.

“Of course. She also knows I’m genuinely happy when I’m with her, I’m glad we can have some time together, to finally talk about our future and get used to each other properly. We didn’t have time to do that you know.” Izuku sighs. “I could barely be home. All she’s done in the past few weeks was waiting for me to come home and see me for a few hours. I couldn’t ruin that time with talking about deep stuff, but now we can actually… talk. It doesn’t make it that much easier though. I can’t lift this glass with my other hand, you know. I’m aware of it and it’s killing me. I would be completely useless if it’s not for black whip. But then she looks at me like I’m the most perfect human being on this whole planet, her pretty eyes shining and… I almost believe it’s true. That this is temporary and I’ll be back to my old self in a heartbeat. It’s not the truth though. I’ll get my heart broken several times before I make my way back to being a hero… and I’m not ready for it. I’m not ready to give up on being the number one. I worked my ass off for it. I cried blood, I sweat blood, yet here I am, on the verge of loosing everything. It makes me question if it was worth it, leaving my mother alone in that house, leaving Sweet Pea alone for days, weeks, breaking her heart over and over because I couldn’t make it home.” Rody is about to say something but Izuku stops him. Rody stays quiet but he slowly moves the glass of cider away from him, even though it’s already almost empty. “I know I’m being stupid. I know this is all in my head. The vestiges tell me that every day. They were talking to me so much when I was in my deepest, darkest phase. Whispering into my ears, telling me I did well, telling me this is not the end. I know that. I know I’m going to work my ass off again and again to get back where I was, it just sucks that I need to.”

“It’s normal to be frustrated when life isn’t going the way you wanted it to.” Rody mutters. “It suck even more when you loose your path thanks to something you can’t control. I know, I’ve been there.” He sighs. “When I lost everything after my father disappeared and I had to take care of two kids when I was supposed to be enjoying my youth, I was really frustrated. It only got worse once I realized I can’t make any money legally thanks to my age. There was a point when I wanted to end it all because I didn’t see the point in fighting. I felt like every step I make just makes the situation worse. But then I thought about my siblings. I thought about their future and about how I can at least make sure they have a good life. Without me, they would’ve been taken away. That kept me going. Then I met you. This is not the end, Deku. Once you fall deep enough, it’s only up from there. That’s what I want you to remember when the hero ratings are out.”

“You are right. I’m being an idiot. I have a roof above my head, enough money in the bank to cover my absence, I have amazing friends, family and an amazing girlfriend.” Izuku admits. “My friends are amazing heroes who can cover for me. It’s not the end of the world.”

“You are an idiot, yes, but I would question your humanity if you wouldn’t have thoughts like that. You are not a robot. You are doing really good compared to your circumstances, but don’t let that stop you from feeling like shit sometimes. Let the frustration out. Don’t bottle it up. This is your one chance to be a real human being without any consequences. Enjoy it. Heal yourself. Let us help, we are here for you.”

Izuku can’t help the tears, and he doesn’t want to; he lets them out, salty streaks trailing down his cheeks as he cuddles into his friend, body shaking like a leaf.

“I’ll be fine, because you guys are with me.” He cries. He feels weirdly dizzy all of a sudden. Hm. Interesting. “I’ll be fine because I want to have fun with everyone. I want to live my life with no regrets. I’ll do my best so I can welcome Roro and Lala with a smile on my face. I’ll do my best, Rody. I will!”

While Rody is clearly laughing at Izuku’s sudden shenanigans, Pino is bawling together with him so Izuku knows he’s not actually being laughed at.

“Okay, sweetheart, you had way too much drink.” Sweet Pea comes into Izuku’s view, giggling with teary eyes. Did she hear him? Was he yelling?

“I’ll make you happy!” Izuku yells into Y/N’s face, because… well… because he can. “I’ll make you really-really happy! And I’ll marry you! We will have five kids! You hear me?”

“Three kids max, Izu. Now let’s put you to bed.”

“But I don’t wanna!!!!”

“Hm.” Rody snickers to himself. “Only two more to go, you clearly have one kid already.”

“HEY!!!!!!!!”

“Why are you yelling?” Y/N giggles.

“Because I will make you happy! Can we get that dog now? I’ll name him All Bark.” Both of them burst out laughing. Why is he being manhandled right now?! He’s completely fine! He can make his way towards the bedroom himself, thank you very much! Okay, maybe once he started crying the booze went into his head a tiny bit but he’ll get better in no time!

“Okay, sweetie, it’s bed time. Rody’s staying in my room today, you guys can chat some more in the morning! Rody needs to sleep, he had a long ride.”

That’s fair. Izuku can live with that.

“Okay…”

~•🥦•~

Secret Winter Cabin Trip! Sponsored by Rody

Eijirou: Hey everyone! Izuku’s friend from Otheon is in town and would like to invite you all to a special “winter wonderland” trip! It’s a 3 days trip, private plane and private cabins! Make yourselves free if you can!

Shouto: What’s the point if I can’t be the driver?

Eijirou: You can still call names and be in charge!

Amajiki-kun: Why am I here?

Eijirou: Because Izuku likes you and you never come out drinking! You can bring your support animal!

Katsuki: You are here because Eijirou’s been moaning about not seeing you for ages.

Mirio: I’m the support animal! And I’m in!

Iida: Sadly, I can’t make it this time! Send me photos, please!

Mina: Ahh, such a bummer! I also can’t make it 😭

Katsuki: Nah, not coming

Mina: LOL, good joke.

Katsuki: I know

Kyouka: Count me in!

Kaminari: Me and my buddy are coming too!

Shinsou: Well, apparently I’m coming, thanks for asking before you wrote that in the group chat you asshole

Momo: I’m coming! I’ll keep an eye on everyone!

Shouto: Wait… winter cabin? It’s not… winter?

Katsuki: I can’t believe it took 30 minutes for someone to question that part. My friends are fucking idiots.

Kaminari: OMGOMG Bakubro called us friends 😭

Katsuki: That was not the point, second hand Pikachu.

Amajiki-kun: I was too scared to mention that.

Eijirou: Don’t worry about the details. You’ll see! Bring warm clothes!

… Next Chapter!

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Potato ramble:

- Hey guys! I made a Ko-fi page just in case you guys would like to support me! Don’t worry, I’m not going to stop writing if I don’t get any donations nor will I start writing quicker if I do! (I literally can’t. I’m writing every day after work already 😂) I also don’t do prompts for money, so please don’t send me any on that site! I’ll make a proper post about this in the future! My main reason to do this is that I really wanted to start digital drawing this year but I ended spending my iPad money on getting my stupid laptop repaired so… every penny helps 😂

Click here if you want to check my page or donate! Thank you!

TL: @garfieldthomas @porusuniverse @stickygumchewer @sixxze @mily-moo @aei-sedai-moiraine @aymasakusa @katsuari @kenzie-deadly @shiviwrites07 @lukerycyja-reblogs @cloroxisadelectabletreat @coffeent @kisskissshutmydoor @bobcar1 @yazminetrahan @cringefan @ronimacaroni77 @themultifandomgirl @dangerousluv1 @emperatris-rinaka @shotos-angelic-whore @angelsdemonsmonsters @norvacaine @rei165 @unofficialmuilover @yao-ai @happydragonfrog @eeerreehhh @vinivave

[uncaught-coolfish]

Fuck it I guess I'll go first.

Why oh fucking WHY was the Ever After not the fucking AFTERLIFE!!!! Seriously, this would have been so perfect as a fucking arc not only for Ruby and her team encountering the people who had died along the way while helping them grow. Since you know when good ol' MKEK, aka. "We can't write for shit." did say Volume nine was about growth until they double baked for one of the most poorly written depictions of mental health ever. This was so bad that it made Thirteen Reasons Why look good! Yeah I went there!!!

The amount of missed opportunities that was there we could have seen Penny explaining to Ruby why she had to die in order for Winter to get the Maiden Powers proclaiming that it was more suited for her rather than herself.

Weiss reuniting with her grandfather and even standing up to her father again along with her antecedents and descendants that she is her own person now and reinforces it by showing Jacques why he was never worthy of holding up the Schnee title.

A final showdown between Blake and Adam with the inclusion of Spirit Sun (since in Before the Dawn, he said he saw visions of a tree. Pertaining to Yggdrasil which I am calling it that since in Volume nine it was only called the Tree and that was it.) with blake promising that she will try to make humans and faunus try to understand and come together in her own way if she must. While Sienna Khan and the other faunus murdered by humans or anti-faunus rights activists all place the future of the Faunus on both hers and Suns shoulders.

Yang learning from people from Taiyangs bloodline how to control her anger so much so that she even admits that she isnt perfect to Blake and tells her to find someone that will love her more than she. Alluding to Sun as he was there more for her than Yang was, which the two agree in a platonic manner.

Oh and the fact we could get to see a mix of Ancient Remnant peeps, Afterans and even mythological creatures (respectfully since they NEARLY shat the bucket there) Oh and the BIGGEST ONE OF THEM ALL .

RUBY MEETING SUMMER ROSE

Sweet Jesus even up the stakes a little by having their souls fall apart as they travel across the Ever-After in a Race Against Time Arc but at the same time we see their semblances Evolve and Grow against the main villain the Red Queen (Not the Red Prince since I like to think he is cared for by the Curious Cat) and the Curious Cat not being some stupid twist villain again but this time someone who was created by the God of Darkness as one of the only "good" creations he had seen. and at the end the Tree of Yggdrasil gives Ruby and Co.... the biggest question to be answered right in front of them.

A WAY TO BEAT SALEM

Like holy SWEET MOSES it is so easy to do a Journey through the Afterlife Arc while giving the characters more time to flesh out and help them grow.

Hot Take Assessment:

This is a really cool idea actually. Tbh I think what I would’ve done for the Ever After is keep the gang separated for longer than like. Half of the first episode.

Keep yang alone since she was the first to go down. Maybe have that connect to her backstory of being abandoned by Raven. Maybe have Blake & Ruby sticking with each other. Develop more of the bond that the two started to have in V8 bc that was really cute and I’m bummed it kind of went nowhere.

Keep Weiss alone and actually FOCUS ON HER AND DONT MAKE HER INTO COMIC RELIEF and how she deals with the fact that her entire home is just. gone. Also the fact that she was the last one standing after her friends presumably died around her.

The one thing I’d change from V8 here is that none of ORNJ falls. Not in a “Jaune gets too much screen time” way, but in a… it makes the cast less messy for this season, way.

And have Neo in the shadows chasing them around. Maybe even throw in some familiar faces, deceased or otherwise. Some purgatory like thing idk.

I might just make that a fic😧

TL;DR Ever After should’ve been a lot less Alice in Wonderland (because they somehow made wonderland boring :() and a lot more Avatar’s Swamp episode.

[crimsonlovebartylus]

potion - @bartylusmicrofic | rating: T

word: 1111 (went overboard oops)

-

Regulus leaned his head on the palm of his hand and discreetly glanced over at Barty who was taking every note possible, his gaze slowly moved to Evan who was staring at his not so subtle Hufflepuff crush, Edgar Bones with a soft smile.

Yet his eyesight went back to Barty, who was biting down on his lip in concentration, who had their sleeves rolled up to their elbows - revealing a few tattoos he had done on himself, to pissed off his dad and his tie was slightly pulled, revealing a chain.

Regulus forced himself to look away before Barty noticed that he was staring - he did not want that, because Barty was his best mate and well best matés don't just look at each other like they want to rip each other's clothes off. So he reluctantly forced himself to look away and listen to Slughorn go on about some potion.

“Attention to detail in the preparations is the prerequisite of all planning…” Slughorn went off, walking around the class slowly and cheerfully. “I prepared some concoctions this morning, Any ideas what these might be?”

Regulus jumped, when he felt the brush of Barty's arm as he raised his hand to answer the question - always the one to get any opportunity to get extra points. All due to the fact that regardless of how much Barty hated his father, he would not give the old bum the chance to talk ill about him.

“Ah yes, Mr. Crouch, please come here” Slughorn said.

Barty tense up a bit, as everyone looked his way, nodding he slowly got up and walked towards the front and looked down at the cauldrons, glancing at the liquids. “That one there is Veritaserum.” He looked up at Slughorn. “It’s a truth-telling serum”

“You need that Reg.” Evan whispered rather loudly, making Regulus jump alarmed and forcing his sight away from Barty- no slughorn.

Pandora and Dorcas laughed behind them quietly. Also knowing about Regulus' obvious crush on Barty.

Regulus glared at Evan, elbowing his best friend. “Shut up. If anyone needs that is you, Mr. I’m not staring at Edgar Bones.”

Evan blushed. “I am not.” he hissed.

Slughorn glances their way. “Quiet down, please. Carry on Mr.Crouch”

Barty nodded, looking down at the next potion and recognizing the sheer pearl color. Fuck Me .“Uh.. This one is terribly tricky to make. It’s Amortentia. The most powerful love potion in the world” A few people in the class perked up in interest. “It’s rumored to smell differently to each person, according to what attracts them… for example, new parchment, uhm freshly mown grass.. Uhm coffee, and paint.”

Regulus blinked, feeling a swirl of jealousy on his tummy trying to figure out who smelled like that and who had Barty in love with them.

“Very good, Mr. Crouch, you may go back to your seat.” Slughorn said, patting Barty in the back, making him tense up briefly.

Barty slowly walked back to his seat, shooting a glare at Evan who was staring at him with the biggest, I knew it grin. He glanced over at Regulus who was currently staring at his book very interested in Draught of Living Death.

“Now, Amortentia doesn’t create actual love…” Slughorn emphasized, glancing at any students that looked suspicious. “But it does cause powerful infatuation and obsession and for that reason, it is probably the most dangerous potion in this room” he claps his hand, smiling. “Alright, I’m going to call a few students to come up here and smell it and tell us what they smell.”

The room immediately goes silent. An almost dramatic eerie silence. A few students exchanged a few nervous glances, at the thought of their crushes knowing that they smell them.

“Let's see… Regulus Black.”

Fuck, Regulus thought. He could feel Barty eyes on him as he got up slowly, walking towards the front. He could always lie and say what he smells in the potion is something else or he could tell the truth, and hope his best friend doesn't disown him.

Regulus glanced down at the swirling pearl color, glaring at it as the different smells started to attack his nostrils.

“Come on boy, we have others.”

Regulus' smile slowly grew as the smell embraced him in a hug, his voice dropping to a dreamy tone. Bartys eyes twitched as the jealousy creeped into the pit of his stomach, at the thought of the lucky person that was making him smile like that. “I smell.. new parchment, sweet.. like candy,” He smiled a bit, an image of Barty hidden candy stash. “Uhm, like a cedarwood smell mixed with water lilies, and coffee…”

And if Barty didn't know before, well he knows now.

“Very good Mr.Black, you may go back to your seat.”

“Mhmm..” Regulus hummed, walking back to his seat. Looking at Evan, who was wiggling his eyebrows at him and trying to tell him something by eyesight.

After an intense eye staring contest, neither was able to telepathically tell each other what they wanted. He casually sat down on his seat, opening his potion book.

“So…” Barty whispered, low enough that only Regulus would be able to hear. “When do you wanna go to hogsmeade with me, as a date?”

“WHAT?” Regulus yelled out, in complete utter shock. How dare Barty Crouch Jr, be a smooth mother fucker. Also, what?

“Everything okay Mr.Black” Slughorn asked, furrowing his eyebrows at the disruption.

Regulus shook his head, blushing. “No, no.. sorry, carry on.”

Slughorn nodded, and continued his lecture on how they would be brewing the potion for next class.

“Was that a yes…?” Barty asked, glancing at him with a grin.

“...Bold for you to assume that I smelled you Crouch, maybe it was Potter.”

Barty clenched his jaw a bit, narrowing his eyes. “Potter? Your “secret” best friend's boyfriend?”

“... there are more potters than James Potter.”

“Right.”

“I swear!” Regulus insisted, blushing.

Barty raises a brow. “You aren’t answering my question.”

“I mean I believe my answer is obvious, considering I did blur out what I’m attracted too in front of everyone.” Regulus shrugged.

“Reg.”

Regulus bites down on his lip. “Yes, fine, let’s go on a date.. just does it have to be Hogsmeade? It’s so cliche.. But if you wanna go there, that’s fine. I’ll do all the cliche shit with you…”

“Reg.” Barty said, making Regulus stop his rambling. “It’s alright, we could go anywhere as long as I get to go on that date with you.”

“Oh, oh okay, alright, yeah I would enjoy a date with you.”

“Good.” Barty replied, bumping his shoulder against him smiling

[lookingfts]

I'm so happy you're here on tumblr! I really like when authors give us the opportunity to talk with them, to take a peek inside their creative space, so to speak...i do have a very important question about the By your side universe. How the living arrangements between Newton and Anthony are going? because i'm rereading say my name and our canine hero just peed on a very pricey rug... -i love this version of Kate and Anthony very much, by the way! -

Hahaha thank you, and an excellent question. Asking the important stuff. Enjoy this glimpse into their domesticity:

Nobody loves a pet quite as much as a man who claims he doesn’t like animals.

Daphne had joked that to her once, after Simon fell in love with a tiny orange kitten they found wandering in their backyard. But Kate thought she had been right, watching the scene unfolding before her.

Specifically, Anthony sprawled out on his sectional, flat on his back with his arm arranged haphazardly across the cushions. Newton had backed up to him, his fluffy bum pressed into the crook of Anthony’s neck and shoulder.

Kate couldn’t blame him. She was pretty partial to curling up in that spot as well.

She took her phone out of her pocket and snapped an incriminating photo, trying to be stealthy, but Anthony heard her soft snicker and blinked awake, looking confused by the mass of fur in his peripheral vision.

“Your beast fell asleep on me,” he said groggily, rubbing a hand over his face.

Newton made a little noise of protest as the movement disturbed his nap, digging his face into the pillow.

“I’m very happy you’re friends,” Kate quipped, swinging her leg over Anthony’s prone form so she could straddle his lap. “I was worried about that.”

“Were you?”

“Yes. It was my biggest concern about dating you, actually.”

Anthony cracked a sleepy grin. It was nice, to be able to joke about it now that the truth was out in the open and Edwina was most of the way toward accepting it.

“In that case,” he murmured, dropping his large hands to her hips. “Newton and I are best friends. I was thinking we should take a boy’s trip, actually.”

Kate giggled, looking down at his heavy-lidded eyes, then to where Newton had shifted position and fallen back to sleep, still tucked against Anthony’s side.

Her heart felt full at the perfect tableau. When Newton made his first mess on the rug and Anthony bought a professional-grade carpet shampooer in response, Kate couldn’t have imagined that they would come this far.

But she thought Anthony was secretly fond of Newton. Because he had a big heart. And because he loved her enough to love him, too.

That knowledge made her next words come easily. “Newton really likes living here.”

Her boyfriend cracked one eye open. “Newton does, hm?”

“Yeah. It feels like home to him,” Kate said, running her hands over his. “And I think he’d like to stay. Permanently.”

She was already living there in everything but name, and Anthony had seemed content to let her take over his flat piece by piece. Newton’s leads hanging on the hooks by the door, food dishes in the kitchen, toys strewn over the floor. Kate’s clothes in his dresser and her books on the bedside table. A hundred tiny pieces of her, mixed with all the pieces of him. The very beginning of a shared life.

And now she wanted to put a name to it.

Anthony gazed up at her, looking a little starstruck as she brushed his floppy hair off his forehead. “It’s already his house,” he answered earnestly. “And yours.”

“Okay,” Kate said, all she really needed to say before she leaned down to kiss him, Newton snuggled happily between them.