#josh kiszka fluff
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ashisill · 3 months ago
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One more time
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Warnings: (unprotected sex,crying, dom Josh, slight fem dom, choking, alcohol consumption, slight arguing, shirtless Josh, and I believe that’s it)
~
“Oh fuck I’m right there” Josh moaned out.
“No no no” you thought to yourself. You’ve almost finished a few times but a change in rhythm and it was gone. You could hear the party buzz from downstairs also distracting you. Or maybe it was the way he was acting. How he was barely touching you. Instead of holding you and whispering sweet things in your ear. It was like he was talking himself and not you. He always rambles on when he’s about to finish usually you talk him through it. Not tonight however, you wondered if he’d even hear you.
“Fuck yeah I’m gonna cum in this pretty pussy”
You didn’t have a response but he moaned out and his jaw dropped. He fucked into frantically whimpering against your neck. You grabbed onto him hoping he wouldn’t stop. Throughout your struggle he pulled out and laid beside you.
“We better get back to the party before they start to miss us”
You stared at him for a moment before realizing he was serious. “Does he not realize I didn’t cum?”
You zoned out looking at the wall while he put his clothes back on. “Darling your dress”
His eyes darted to it lying in the floor. You snapped out of it and, slowly put it back on.
“Everything alright?”
“Uh huh”
You went back downstairs where people hovered everywhere. Josh decided to throw a house party you never cared for them. Sure it was nice for a while but you were quickly drained. Josh however was a host, entertainer, and the life of the party. He adored hosting and planning theses parties. You never shared your dread for them because they made him so happy. Josh was meant to be around people he got along with everyone. You on the other hand seemed to hide in the shadows. Talking amongst small groups that came and went. Or hanging on tight to Jake who also likes to linger in corners.
Like usual it was you and Jake in the kitchen. Subconsciously frustrated with Josh you were throwing back shots. Jake was getting a bit worried with how many you were taking.
“Take it easy girl Josh would kill me if I let you get too drunk”
“Oh whatever it’s not like he pays attention”
“What?” He laughed at you already stumbling around.
You covered your mouth and giggled “yeah he’d probably kill me if I told you”
He nodded and placed his hand on your upper back making sure you didn’t fall over. “Just know he made me mad”
“Okay doll I’ll take your side” he laughed.
The night went on and so did your attitude with Josh. “Hey mama”
No response from you just a glare. You struck a nerve. In his mind you would be his happy girl who he just made love too. Unfortunately he was the only one who felt the love. You rolled your eyes and started to walk away. He had enough and grabbed your wrist catching you off guard. “Get in here right now!”
“Oh get off”
“What is your problem ma’am?”
“Youuuuuu” you drunkenly shove a finger in his chest.
He held back a laugh at you trying to be mad, but being a little too drunk. “What have I done pretty girl?”
“You didn’t make me cum”. You bit out far too loud. He brought a finger to his lips telling you to hush. He began to speak in a whisper.
“Oh why didn’t you tell me baby?”
“Well youuuu” another poke to the chest “didn’t you didn’t even care”
“Oh that’s so not true and you know it. I’ll make you cum sweet girl. Go on head up stairs … or maybe I’ll carry you” he said after watching you trip.
“Jake you’re a horrible babysitter!” He shouts heading upstairs with you in his arms.
You whined as soon as your back hit the mattress. He was quick to strip you of your clothes. “You want mouth or him” he looked down at his hard on.
“Him” you giggled a grabbed at cock.
He undid his belt and slid off his jeans. He hovered above you and let his salvia fall from his mouth to your cunt. “Mhm I like that”
“Oh yeah?” He did it again and playfully smacked your cunt rubbing it in.
“Yeah baby hit her again”
“Like this” he did it again but so soft.
“Come on baby harder” you whined and squirmed beneath him.
“I don’t wanna hurt you mama”
“I like it” you smiled up at him.
“Once” he told you looking at those eyes of yours. Raising a hand and landing a hard smack against her causing you to moan.
“Again” you begged.
“What did I say?”
You rolled your eyes at him. Without warning another hard slap landed against your pussy. “Roll your eyes again and see what happens”
“Oh fuck”
“Now behave”
He shook his head frustrated and nudged your entrance. You whined out, and pulled him closer to you. He slowly bottomed out inside you, and slowly sat his pace. “More”
“I’ve hardly started sweet girl”
“I don’t care, more”
“Be a girl good I’ll make you finish”
“No I won’t be I-I want more” you drunkenly slurred
He sped up fucking into faster, but not harder. After complaint after complaint you’ve begun to irritate him. He flipped you on your stomach and shoved himself inside before giving you a moment to adjust.
“Is this what you fucking wanted?”
“Oh fuck Josh yes fuck yes”
His hand wrapped around your throat, and he fucked into you ruthlessly. Your eyes began to water, and your moans became louder.
“Dirty girl this is what you asked for. Your gonna fucking take it until I cum in your sweet pussy”
That word so vulgar and raunchy turned you on more than it should. “Oh my god don’t you stop”
Although what you said about loud house parties you were thankful for them right now. A scream ripped through your lungs. He quieted you anyways worried someone was on this floor.
“Oh fuck shh shh shh”. His other hand covered your mouth. “Only I’m allowed to hear you pretty voice”
Words didn’t make sense, you couldn’t form a sentence, and that familiar feeling began to burn in your stomach. He felt you squeezing his cock and knew you were close. “Is that the spot sweet girl?”
You moaned into his hand which only made him want you more. The burning in your belly snapped and sent you reeling into an orgasm. Your legs and core shaking profusely beneath him. It worked its way to your whole body. Your vision went dark all you knew was him. His voice, his scent, and his cock.
Slightly concerned he slowed down which caused you to yell out. His grip on your throat and mouth lessened “I’m checking on you love. How you doing baby?”
In response you began fucking your self against him. Moving back and forth along his cock. “I said don’t stop”
“Take me there mama I’m so close”
He wrapped himself around you and rested his head on your back . You’ve tired him out completely. You could feel his heart beating against you. The soft moans that were leaving his mouth were lovely in your ear. “You sound pretty darling” you said to him.
“I’m … right … there” he said pausing in between.
“Gonna cum pretty for me sweet boy?”
“Just for you mama. Oh fuck”
He let go inside you and you could feel his cock twitching. “I’m cumming mama” His jaw dropped and little suffocated whines followed. He gripped you hard before completely collapsing on you.
You giggled and tried to squirm out “Josh I can’t breath”
“That’s too bad” he said with a soft smile.
“Josh honey …” you said feeling him leak out of you. “I think I need a towel”
Taking his shirt off the floor he cleaned you up. “Now what are you gonna wear?”
“Nothing I grantee there’s not a single sober person in this place by now”
You shared a moment cuddle up with him before heading back downstairs. Jake saw you two and immediately started laughing.
“Someone had a good time” he said combing your hair back and fixed your smudge eyeliner. Then there went Josh to be the life of the party. You stayed in the corner with Jake as usual. You smiled softly watching your shirtless boyfriend join in a conversation so easily. You on the other hand stayed with Jake, and you sat in comfortable silence. Both of you watching Josh merge with everyone he saw. The two of you wondering how it was so easy for him, but neither one of you said that. Instead you laid your head on his shoulder. Resting your eyes which ended with you getting a little too sleepy.
You were awoken with Josh carrying you up the stairs. Closing your eyes quick before he realizes. The house was quiet besides the whispers between the twins.. You felt like a little girl again. He tucked you into bed with a kiss on your forehead. He laid beside you holding your waist. “I don’t know if you’re awake sweet girl, but I love you”
You eyes peeks open love enough to whisper “I love you too Josh”
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katuschka · 11 days ago
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Pierrot Sleeps
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Josh Kiszka x f!OC/reader
/friends to lovers/
8.036 words
I dedicate this one to everyone who needs some healing...
Pierrot sleeps, silently He’s dreaming next to me Painted black tear, on his soft face And the sweetest lips; they never speak to me My Pierrot sleeps (Barbora Mochowa – Pierrot)
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Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, intended for adult readers. Any resemblance to real persons is purely coincidental. Also, if you're under 18, go find some other entertainment elsewhere.
Warnings (are spoilers): heartbreak, unrequitted love, pining for a friend, breakup, friends to lovers, slow burn, sweet Josh, kissing, fluff, smut: petting, oral sex, vag. sex, a few allusions to a suicise of a minor character (in the past), briefly mentioned attempted suicide (retrospective), depressive thoughts, expressive language, bad weather
You can also view my Masterlist, join the Taglist or listen to Pierrot Sleeps Playlist 🎶
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At least it stopped raining… eventually.
Josh had expected there would be morning fog, so the fact that the world around them was shrouded in a thick blanket of clouds did not surprise him. Not only was it just as the forecast predicted, but he had been even looking forward to it. Foggy woods looked dreamy at this time of year. They’d have the best time, surely, and he could take a lot of pictures... 
He however did not expect to be woken up by heavy rain drumming on the roof above them, and – on top of that – a whole half an hour before the alarm clock was supposed to rouse them. Too early to be happy about being awake, and too little time left to go back to sleep. Had it been the fall morning sun shining right into his face, he wouldn’t say a word. But rainfall? That didn’t go according to the plan. 
He had been warned though, and despite his own nature, he chose to believe the technology instead. 
The initial rhythmic patter only grew in intensity and it soon sounded as if the cabin was built right under a waterfall. That, together with the obtrusive light coming from the screen of his phone, finally woke her too. She didn’t make herself known at first. She listened silently for several seconds to the downpour growing stronger and waiting for his reaction with malicious glee. She was rewarded pretty soon, and his loud, annoyed grunt made her chuckle. 
“Told you…,” she mumbled from under the cozy blanket sleepily, suddenly hopeful that they’d just stay inside, sipping sahlep in front of the fireplace. She would eat almond truffles and he could have his dried apple chips, or whatever. Maybe they could even try to play a game of chess. Josh had been telling her that he didn’t have the right brain for that, but she was adamant; and determined to teach him. His annoyed face, illuminated by the light blue light, however told that it probably wasn’t the best day for that. Again. 
They had been both really looking forward to the trip, so she wasn’t even sure why she suddenly felt almost glad that their hiking plans might be ruined. The prospect of getting wet and numb with cold didn’t appeal to her at all, but it usually didn’t stop her. And when it did (When the heavens literally opened just like that morning), she’d be pretty pissed off for being forced to stay inside. Not this time though. Not when she was enveloped with the warmth and the scent of him. And that was something she had been looking forward to even more.
They shared the bed, just like many times before, just like friends often do. The cabin had two separate bedrooms, but it didn’t even occur to them to part their ways for the night. Not when the whole point of this trip was not to be alone. That would be silly. 
And just like many mornings before, she closed her eyes again in a pretense of having fallen back to sleep just to revel in the morning smell of his body close to her for a little bit longer. But he wouldn’t be fooled by her closed eyes; being already quite familiar with her breathing patterns. 
“Yeah, you did, weather girl, but let’s not get discouraged, yeah? The…the app says it’ll be over in an hour. So, we’re still on schedule. AND it also says there might be some sunlight by midday, and so does the radar… Hey, hey, wake up! Tea?” 
“Coffee!” she huffed in exasperation. After all that time, he still kept trying. Coffee’s bad for you, blah blah blah… And maybe he was right. Just look at him! Fit and bubbly, filled with sunshine and energy right from the moment his eyes opened to greet the new day. Even when he was hurting, he always mustered enough energy to fill every room with light and love. As long as there were other people willing to share the moment with him, he was ok. Meanwhile, she felt like Gollum, torn between love and hate for the things that kept her (barely) functioning. Not just coffee… him, too. Her precious. She kept pursuing him, seeking his presence, while hoping that one day, she would be free, while not really wanting to. It was always the worst on mornings like this one, when she almost had him in her grasp, and then he always slipped out, because he was never hers. 
She watched him fumbling for his clothes in semi darkness, pondering. Sleeping just in his briefs right next to her never seemed to faze him, and the thought always made her heart sink. Maybe he didn’t like the way she looked, so he never considered those moments to be overly intimate. That’s fine. But didn’t it ever occur to him how much she loved his body? Probably not. They were such good friends, after all. Right? Truth be told, she really tried her best to hide the truth from him. There were so many things to say, but she never did. 
‘Come back to bed.’ What a simple request; one that people often say in situations like this one. ‘Come back to bed and just be with me. The world can wait…’ Yet she couldn't. She had no privilege to ask that. 
Such good friends. That’s what everyone kept saying: ‘You two are such good friends.’ Everyone except Jake; that nosy, observant asshole. He mentioned his suspicion just once, and then abandoned the topic forever after she made it VERY clear that she didn’t want to discuss it and threatened to cut his balls off if he ever mentioned that to Josh.
They had been so close from the very start – she and Josh – despite the fact that they were from two seemingly different worlds. Or maybe because of that, because he seemed to deliberately seek the company of the people who didn’t care what he was. He didn’t have to pretend anything in front of her; she just let him be himself, even when it was not always nice or flattering. She loved all of him. 
Yeah, she did. She loved him. And she knew she would from the moment she first saw him, when he ran into the coffee shop she worked in to hide from the rain... 
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The bell chimed, and she looked up, together with several other people, all of them surprised by the sudden commotion that disrupted the serenity of that lazy afternoon. He literally fell through the door, giggling awkwardly before he looked around, beaming and taking everything in, like a child in a toy store.  
Are you familiar with those cheeky and extremely cliche movie scenes when the hero sees the object of their desire for the very first time and everything suddenly turns to slow motion? So melodramatic and stupid, very stupid indeed; so stupid they use it mostly in parodies these days. And yet, it’s also exactly what happened to her when her eyes first fell on the dampened halo of his messy curls. What a tiny, beautiful, ethereal man. He looked like an angel on vacation, dressed in pale jeans and a simple white long-sleeved shirt. Quite ordinary. It was the long string of beads around his neck, almost like a rosary, that made him look out of this world. But nothing could prepare her for the feeling that swept through her and he finally looked at her. 
When she was very little, maybe two or three, she had a very strange dream once. The sun fell from the sky, landed on their street right next to their house and she watched, quite mesmerized, how it rolled behind their windows like a huge fiery balloon. She was too small to know that the sun was literally just a ball of fire, and yet that’s exactly how it appeared to her in the dream, except “her” sun didn’t have more than two meters in diameter and it didn’t scorch anything. That strange and bizarre dream left such an imprint on her young and expanding mind that it eventually became one of her core memories. Then, as years went by and adulthood hit her with brutal force, she almost forgot about it. 
Until he appeared. 
He introduced himself as Josh without even being asked, ordered matcha tea and then he took a barstool by the counter right opposite to her, because she was the only person in the whole room willing to talk to him; everyone else was staring at their phones or laptops and just minding their own business. 
And it was SO easy talking to him, despite the fact that she was completely and utterly smitten with him, which usually tied her tongue in similar situations. Not with Josh. They talked for only half an hour about nothing important, but it was enough for him to unknowingly etch himself in her brain and gut. 
Then he finally picked Josh up, just when the rain stopped, and they left together, seemingly forever. 
Her mind was still full with the images of him when she went to bed that day, and he even materialized again as a drunken memory in her dreams. Her conviction that she wasn’t destined to have people like him in her life made the apparition both sweet and distant, but destiny never prevented anyone from having dreams about it, right? His existence seemed almost unreal the morning after. He became a vision – and an illusion – of a better world where people were actually nice to one another. Like a character from a favorite comfort book: someone who never really existed, but it was still nice to imagine.
Then, five days later, Josh came back. 
He stayed for three long hours, as if he had no responsibilities in this world except for filling it with his contagious laughter. He ordered a whole pot of oolong and charmingly voiced his desire to pester her for the rest of the afternoon. When she asked why, his answer was simply ‘why not.’ That’s what the places like the one she worked in were for, and she shouldn’t get excluded, he said.
So they talked again, pausing only when other people came to take their order. They talked about poetry and cartoons and favorite sweets (she loved almond truffles!). She told him about her early childhood and a grandmother who could bake heavenly pastries, and he shared funny stories about his brothers and praised the wit and beauty of his sister. 
There were times when such stories would make her feel miserable, but his own tales filled her with hopefulness. He exuded so much love and light no doubt because those people he talked about had always been there for him. If only she hadn’t failed to be there for her sister when she needed her the most. People kept telling her that it wasn’t her fault, but their words fell flat. Convinced that she should have known, she almost followed the same footsteps. They just found her in time…
Back then she told him that she was an only child. 
The next time, Josh came back with a small bag full of almond truffles, which he traded for her number. And so they slowly became regular friends, with their lives gradually intertwining even outside of that coffee shop. 
Days went by, then weeks. Slowly, she learned all about his passions and dreams, and nothing about his job. Then one day, just before Christmas, a group of people asked for a picture and he had to come clear afterwards. Nothing shocking in Nashville, It just made her admire him even more, and he couldn’t get mad when she finally told him her truth. Months passed by and finally there were no more secrets, even though her initial childish idea that he must have fallen from the sky was crushed. 
At least she wasn’t surprised when he disappeared for months. 
He often said ‘I love you’ and sometimes she imagined how it would feel if one day he’d mean it in a way that would make her skin tingle and cheeks burn. But that was not to be. The meaning was reserved for someone else, because he belonged to someone else. Plain and simple. They were so in love. Even through the veil of her jealousy, she could see the pure miracle of it. Everything Josh did seemed miraculous. It kept breaking her heart in the most peculiar and strangely addictive way. 
He was always there for her as a dear friend, but never as someone who could keep her warm at night. He was unavailable. 
Until he wasn’t. And yet…
He called her around two am that night, crying so hard he couldn’t even talk coherently. She wasted no time; having thrown just a long cardigan over her pajamas, she ran out the door, jumped in the car and headed straight to their… to his house. 
They snuggled together in his bed, and she kept holding him tight until he finally relaxed and fell asleep. And when she woke up a few hours later, feeling his limbs wrapped around her body and his hot breath on the exposed skin of her shoulder, she looked up at the ceiling and her heart broke in a thousand little pieces once again. So this was how it felt… and she was destined to experience it only when they both felt like that, only not for each other… His touches during waking hours kept whispering ‘I’m glad’, but never ‘I yearn’. 
He mewled suddenly, no doubt tormented by some disturbing dream, and grip around her only tightened. She turned to her side and hugged him back, watching his peaceful, doll-like face and listening to his light snores that made his parted lips quiver ever so slightly.  
“Why didn’t you call one of your brothers?” she asked once he finally opened his eyes and, seeing her face right in front of his, greeted her with his sweet smile, even though it was short lived. 
“You don’t judge me…,” he mumbled after a while.
“Your brothers don’t judge you either, silly! I know that, and so do you.”
“Yeah, but…I guess I needed a hug, and not just having my shoulder squeezed. Besides, they…they have their own people and, uh… other creatures to take care of...”
Ouch…
The truth is, he had tried to set her up with other people in the past, oblivious to the fact that the only one she wanted was him. So she kept lying to him, making up reasons why the dates and hook-ups never did work out. Even when she ended up in bed with them – and some of them were really good – it never made her want to see them more than just a couple times. 
She had been like that even before she met him, to be honest. Men and women had come and gone, and her heart had remained closed, save for a few youthful infatuations. Her resolve not to commit to anyone only strengthened after what happened to Shania. Then one day, Josh appeared with a golden key, forced it in the lock and occupied the tiny space ever since, unaware of what he really did. 
And the reason why she always tried to hide it the best way she (physically) could was because she was too grateful for what she already had in him. Such good friends… The risk of ruining it all was too great and too foolish. Because, by being there for her as a friend, he had already helped her more than she could possibly imagine. He had danced into the darkness of her dreary life and brought sunshine into it. She had a wonderful friend in him. The fact that she loved him romantically was just a minor snag. Maybe, just maybe, if she had known him sooner, she wouldn’t have to keep hiding the scarry reminder of forecast days on her wrists. But for everything there is a season…
… and fall is perfect for hiking. 
So was the summer after he left, and so they – Josh and her – took advantage of every opportunity to spend it together in nature… or at least in his garden. Because, in spite of all the bad things happening, one could always rely on nature to be beautiful and welcoming, at least for now. 
Josh’s busy schedule and constant traveling blessed him with the mercy of having his mind occupied, so that he wouldn’t have to think about the breakup so much, but everytime he got home – even when it was just for a few days – he kept seeking her company as well as her hugs, because his house suddenly seemed too big and silent and scary, and his brothers naturally wanted to spend the valuable time with their own significant others. 
After that first, painful night, falling asleep in each other’s embrace became at first a frequent occurrence, and later almost a habit. Their movie nights, Sunday outdoor trips or late night garden picnics often ended that way. Lying on a blanket under a cloudless sky and pretending they could actually see any stars, they cuddled more often than not as the temperature dropped. He cried a few more times in early June, but after a while it just became a pleasant habit. Josh was never the person to shy away from physical contact, so it felt completely natural to him. It was always innocent, too, with their hands never wandering to any inappropriate places. A few times she could feel his lips brush against her locks – feather-like kisses that never touched the skin – but that was it. It always left her hungry for more, and the hunger kept growing… 
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The smell of coffee and vanilla coming from the kitchen put an end to her reminiscing, as it made her stomach rumble and pulled her mind back into the physical reality of the cabin. She finally managed to drag her lazy body out of bed and, after a short stop in the bathroom, followed the smell and the sound and the light, like a curious cat. 
Josh was not a fruit loop guy and she was not allowed to eat that shit either, at least not under his watch. In consequence, their days spent together also meant that she was eating properly for a while. 
She found him standing by the stove, making oatmeal with raisins and swaying to some unknown tune he was humming. She caught just a few words, something about bed and needing to touch again, and immediately wanted to go back, because damn! He was reading her mind. 
Her footsteps made him stop and turn around, greeting her with his radiant smile. Snap. Another beautiful picture for the photo album of her mind. Having been blessed with an excellent memory, she often used it as an internal polaroid, taking snapshots of the beauty of the world to browse through when old. She, however, cheated with her stills of Josh, replaying them in her mind every time she was alone in her own bed. 
“Finally! I thought I’d have to drag… you’re doing it again!”
“Doing what?” She couldn’t help but to reciprocate the toothy smile. 
“You know what!” He threatened to pat her head playfully with the stirring spoon, making her duck down so as not to have chunks of hot oatmeal in her hair. “Save some space in that fancy brain of yours for the wonders of nature. Today’s gonna be EPIC!” He swung the spoon epicly towards the milky blue nothingness outside the window. 
“It’s still raining, Josh.”
“Mmmm, not for long, I’m tellin’ya. Now grab that mug before that bitter shit gets cold.” He nearly overturned the cup of coffee with the large spoon and she snatched it out of his reach just in time to save the valuable fragrant liquid. He turned back to the stove, chuckling. “Gonna serve this heavenly manna in a sec, so take a seat, mademoiselle,” he added playfully in a low voice. “Cinnamon?” 
“Yeah, why not. Just a pinch.”
“As you wisssssssh… Here comes the sun, little daaaarling, here comes the su-un, and Iiiiii saaay…”
Moments like these often made her mind and body dissociate. The body was drawn to him, yearning to hug him from behind and bite at his exposed earlobe, while the mind knew her place was at the table, where she was told to patiently wait for the breakfast to be served, while admiring his beauty from a respectable distance. The mind always won. Their new-found closeness, however exciting and really borderline intimate sometimes, had its boundaries. 
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He was right. The rain stopped eventually, so they packed their bags with all the necessities they might need for the whole day outside, and together they entered the misty world of barren bony branches, orange leaves and hidden horizons. It was already almost 8 am when they left the warm confines of their rented cabin, but the landscape remained shrouded in early November murkiness. They walked for at least an hour without speaking, the ubiquitous mist still unwilling to dissipate. 
“It’s almost like a completely different planet, isn’t in,” she finally broke the silence. 
“M-hm,” was the only response she got. She honestly often preferred it that way, being able to get lost in her own thoughts and daydreams, but that very rarely happened when Josh kept her company. His need to share everything that was on his mind – which was usually a LOT – could often be quite overwhelming. It also never failed to entertain everyone around him, because the vastness of his mind could compete with the plains on Mars, and it was just as untamed.
The fact that he was suddenly so unusually taciturn made her a bit uneasy. Something was wrong. She already noticed it the night before, and thought it was only understandable, given the recent events. She was devastated as well, thinking about Shania again, and how it would break her heart if she hadn’t chosen to make it stop beating willingly. 
But then they talked quite openly about that and he returned back to his normal, radiant self as soon as they climbed in their shared bed. Now she had that nagging feeling once again… as if he was hiding something from her. Something was different. 
“Are you still sad?” she asked tentatively. 
“About what?” His tone was wary, making her uncertain whether she should even continue or just let it be. Alas, her nosy nature prevailed.
“The breakup.”
It took him a few seconds to respond, clearing his throat and kicking a few pebbles first. She’d swear she could sense a brand new kind of tension in the air, but she couldn’t really  put her finger on it. It was almost just a split second.
“No, not anymore. Sometimes at night, when the house is quiet, I feel a sense of melancholy, you know? I guess I’m just not used to being alone. But I welcome the feeling, really. I think I wrote my best lyrics feeling just like that. And…” And he kept on talking. On and on and on.  She asked a simple question and he could have provided a simple answer, but after three minutes of babbling, just when his mind somehow wandered to Sam’s ravioli, she suddenly stopped in her tracks and started laughing. The bitch was back, as he himself would say, although that was not really it. He sensed her worry and just wanted to do anything he could to disperse it. 
“What?” He really tried to frown at her accusingly, but failed miserably, the corners of his mouth twitching. 
“It’s just… you could have just said ‘no’, but I admire the lengths you go to prove that you’re not.”
“Keep mocking my eloquence, love, and you’ll regret it, I tell ya!” Already a few steps ahead of her, he started walking backwards, pointing his finger at her menacingly. 
“Josh, be care…”
“FUUU…ouch!”
“...ful… Moron!”
 Of course he stumbled over an exposed tree root and fell right on his butt. Thankfully, he managed to land in the middle of a small heap of wet foliage instead of stones or worse – down the steep slope adjacent to the path they were on. She offered him her hand with an exasperated sigh and helped him get back on his feet, feigning anger – anything to hide how much that one word reverberated inside her ribcage. Love…   
“C’mon! Don’t be mad. My ass is damp and freezing now, so it’s fun, yeah?” Once back on his feet, he grabbed her shoulder for support in order to regain balance and smiled reassuringly to wipe that frown off her face. To no avail. No, it wasn’t exactly fun, and seeing his beautiful eyes so close only made it worse. She stared back into those dark beads before her gaze slid down to his lips that he licked just a moment ago, and the chilly mist filling her lungs suddenly felt like water, together with a totally unwelcome wave of arousal that swept through her body. She was genuinely mad all of the sudden, but only at herself. 
“You’re an idiot, Josh.” She let go and stormed up the path, forcing him to speed up to catch up with her. 
“Y/N, hang on… why are you so angry?”
“You were literally just a few feet from breaking your leg… or something else!” she spat in response and with her eyes set on the path ahead.
“No, I wasn’t. And nothing happened!” Josh raised his voice just a notch, his own anger growing. They were side to side again and he finally forced her to turn back to him. She tried to fight it, she really did, but in spite of her efforts to behave reasonably, she could feel her eyes prickle again, threatening to betray her. 
“It’s been almost five years since she jumped… in November…just…stop scaring me like that, ok?” Her voice quivered under the burden of her sudden deliberate machinations. What she said was true, but it wasn’t the real reason why she felt so upset at that very moment and she felt bad instantly for using it as an excuse. That was completely unfair to both of them. 
Josh’s features immediately softened and he pulled her in for a tight hug. “I know… sorry,” he whispered, and she melted into his touch, no longer caring how she “deserved” it. They remained like that for almost a minute before he commanded that it was time to move if they didn’t want to return back after dark. 
The rest of the morning was spent more or less in silence once again, interspersed with occasional casual chit chat. As the path grew steeper and more stony, pale patches of light cerulean blue began to show up through thinning low clouds, making them both hopeful. The air temperature grew gradually milder, too. “The inversion season’s finally here! Yay!” he exclaimed with childish enthusiasm – one of many things that kept people drawn to him like moths to a flame. It seemed just impossible not to love him. 
They reached the ridge – their final destination – just around midday, and just in time to step out of the clouds that still hung low in the surrounding valleys. It felt like reaching the sky, with the ridge and a few surrounding rounded peaks looking like floating islands in the midst of a foamy ocean.
“Aaaah, this is beautiful!” She tilted her head back, letting the sun warm up her damp cheeks. 
“Told ya,” he smiled softly and she expected him to continue teasing her, but he seemed unnaturally quiet and serene once again. Pulling his camera from the bag, he took a few snapshots of the misty sea below them. They watched the clouds roll by slowly for a while before he spoke. “I used to dream about telling stories through pictures...” 
She knew all about his old passion, but she also thought he was exceptional at what fate chose for him eventually. “You do tell stories Josh. You help people paint their own internal landscapes.” 
“Do I…”
“Of course you do!”
“So I believed. Pictures, words, soundwaves, doesn’t really matter, that’s not my point. I mean,.. I wasn’t really telling the… the truth yesterday. I am scared…I mean, not for myself, not really, but…I don’t…I guess, sometimes things are just destined to remain broken no matter how hard you try, you know…I’m mostly heartbroken, really.”
She wasn’t really sure where this was going. Having been familiar with his insecurities for quite some time, she knew too well that he was sometimes too humble for his own good, but he hardly ever sounded that defeated. “Well, you know…how was that line…’Take your broken heart and make it into art.”
“But what’s the point?”
And just like that, with a snap of a finger, the temperature dropped, making her shiver. Speaking to the world through art was the core of his whole existence and she’d rather die than watch him doubt the importance of it. 
“Josh!”
“Y/N!”
His feeble attempt to mock her sudden urgent tone annoyed her, but definitely not enough to stop her from trying to prevent him from going down that gloomy path. “Listen, asshole! Stop with the bullshit, ok? You believed we’d have sun today. And look! I absolutely needed this, and would have missed it if it weren’t for you. And MANY people feel the same, because you inspire them, so cut that defeatist crap or else I’ll smack it out of you!”
He looked at her as if she had already really slapped him in the face, but his shocked and astonished expression slowly morphed into a soft and grateful smile. “Thank you, Y/N.” 
“WELL YOU’RE WELCOME!” she responded with an unnecessary theatricality, unwilling to abandon the angry pose just yet, just in case. “Now give me this, because I think you need to see what I see.” She snatched the camera out of his hand and took a step back so that the viewfinder showed exactly what she wanted to capture. He, however, started fumbling for a phone in his jacket, completely ruining the shot. 
“No, let’s take a selfie,” he said when he finally found and unlocked it.
“Selfie? You? Since when have you been taking selfies?”
“I DO from time to time.” He looked almost offended, pouting at her like a defiant child. Sighing exasperatedly, she finally agreed to it, stepping closer to him, letting him wrap his arm around her shoulder.
“But you need to look into the lens Jo…” On the display, she could see him looking sideways at her, his eyes slowly tracing the contours of her profile. His jaw clenched and she could no longer finish the sentence. Instead, she slowly turned her own face to meet his gaze. He lowered his arm, snaked it around her and she held her breath, barely conscious of his other hand slowly finding its way to cup the nape of her head just below her ponytail. Dreamily, she watched his lips growing closer to hers until they met and she could swear her heart stopped. 
He tasted like apples. 
It was soft and tender at first, his pouty lips just brushing over hers like the wings of a butterfly. She leaned into it and invited him in, and soon they could taste each other properly, with their tongues entangling and dancing around languidly. She turned deaf and blind, but acutely aware of every cell of his body she could reach and taste and caress and devour, and getting high on it, her head spinning more and more with each passing second. 
When they finally parted and her sight returned, they looked at each other and even though neither said a word, they could both see the same question in each other’s eyes. 
What now…
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The entire walk back into the cabin was spent in silent anticipation. The way he held her hand was completely innocent, even with their fingers intertwined… 
The contents of their minds, not so much. They didn’t dare to speak about it just yet, in fear that they might jinx it. She kept replaying it in her head, over and over again. The feeling of his soft lips on hers still lingered and her insides twisted and turned with the primal need for him to do it again. It was just as strong as thirst, and much more overwhelming. 
As the hour grew late, even the valleys were now sun-soaked. The world joined them in their silence and only the rustling of gravel and foliage under their feet disturbed the unearthly peace. Having kept her eyes on the ground, she looked up when they left the shadows of trees behind them and set foot on the vast clearing that separated them from their cabin… the fireplace… the bed… The road to it was blinding, as the late afternoon sun turned the distant horizon into silver ribbons, making them squint. She squeezed his hand involuntarily as her heart freaked out again, and he responded by stroking her knuckles with the tip of his thumb. The lust was palpable, making them both alert like lonely puppies just before hearing the door knob turn. 
Having avoided the topic for a few long hours, the tension between them only grew when they reached the cabin, only to be replaced with a sense of panic and uncertainty when they stepped inside. 
“So…”
“Are you hungry?” She interrupted him, before he could say more. Please say yes, so that I can cook us dinner and... 
“Not really, no.”
“Me neither.” She was fidgety, biting her lip, scratching her arm nervously, looking up at him and then averting her gaze repeatedly. 
“Y/N… we don’t have to…”
“I want to!” she blurted out and then sank her teeth in her lower lip again. 
Ok… calm down baby, let me…follow me…” he offered her his hand and slowly led her into the bathroom. 
They stripped each other slowly and then they kissed again. He turned on the shower and she bashfully stepped under the streaming water next to him. He pulled her closer and kissed her some more, while tracing the outline of her shoulders with his fingertips. Only then he dared to venture lower. 
His fingers brushed over her left nipple before he cupped the whole breast gently in his palm and she could swear it felt like he was cradling her very own heart in it instead, making her hold her breath. His eyes were lowered the whole time, watching his own actions intently and attentively, almost apprehensively, waiting for her reactions and receiving none. She was frozen with illogical fear. He looked up suddenly, making her head spin. “Tell me what you like,” he whispered. 
“Everything.” His brows shot up in question, so she clarified: “I like everything about this, Josh.” 
She meant it as encouragement, but it wasn’t helpful at all. He cleared his throat nervously and stroked her arm gently, from her shoulder all the way down to her elbow. His eyes once again followed the motions of his hand. “I wanna know everything about you.” This time he wasn’t talking about her life or soul. He already knew almost everything about that, after all those hours and hours spent talking and daydreaming together. Her body, however, was an unknown instrument, and he was desperate to learn how to play it well. 
Feeling wanted, and with all the newfound courage she could muster, she cupped his cheeks and kissed him with long suppressed passion, pausing only briefly to ask him back. “Can I learn everything about you, too?” 
“Please! You must,” he whispered against her lips, while she wrapped her fingers around his full-blown erection and started stroking him tentatively, making him moan in her mouth. Encouraged, she tightened her grip and quickened her pace. He gasped, breaking the kiss and pressing his forehead against hers instead. “You learn quickly, baby,” he whimpered, leaning with his outstretched arm against the tiled wall behind her. She kissed his flexed bicep in response and slid down on her knees in front of him, but he only shook his head and pulled her back up. 
“You don’t want that?” she asked, confused. There was a hint of hurt in her voice, so he pulled her in an embrace and kissed her wet hair as the water kept pouring down on them. 
“Just the idea of your lips wrapped around my dick tells me it’d be very quick… and I don’t want that. Let’s take this slow, yeah? Let me…” 
She let him take the lead and his lips went on a journey. They traced the edge of her jaw when he shampooed her hair and she tilted her head in delight. This new intimacy could only be described as ecstatic. Everything turned into a blur. She was just barely aware of him wrapping her in a bath towel, and she couldn’t remember how they got in bed. It was his tongue licking a stripe up her inner thigh that made her acutely aware of her surroundings once again. She gasped in surprise when she felt his hot breath on her wet pussy. Looking at her daringly, he hovered just an inch above it, the tip of his tongue resting on his upper lip tellingly. “May I?”
She swallowed harshly to relieve her parched throat. “I want you fuck me, Josh. Please.”
“And I will… but let me make you fly first.” Without any further ado, he darted his tongue between her folds and she arched her back as if struck by electricity. After a few more teasing licks, he wrapped his lips around her clit and started sucking gently, with his velvet tongue drawing slow circles on the underside before it started fluttering rapidly over the whole bud. Soon he sent her into orbit, just as he promised. She was still shaking and gasping for air when he swiftly climbed up her body and positioned himself in between her legs. 
Once inside her, he could no longer keep it slow. He let out a deep guttural groan and, as if a bolt of electricity shot through him, started thrusting into her with newfound virility. She wrapped both her arms and legs around him and pulled him even closer to her, almost afraid that he would float away and dissolve in midair if she stopped holding him tight enough, just like he always had done in her dreams. Even her own mind never allowed her to feel like this, so how could this possibly be real? After all that time. It felt too good to be real. His hands cradling her head, his own loud moans so close to her ear, urgent and melodic and almost lewd, all in one. With his elbows on each side of her head, and his lips brushing against her earlobe, she felt enshrined under him. It was overwhelming, it made her head spin as if high on oxygen…which she probably was. Unable to control her wildly beating heart and her quickened breath, she was barely conscious of that pleasant feeling he was stirring deep inside her. It didn’t even matter. She arched her back again and shivered as his singing grew louder. She could come just from listening to him. 
The skin on his back under her wandering hands, warm and velvety at first, soon turned damp and sticky from exertion, as his movements grew even more frantic and wild. She tilted her head back and cried out when he hit her cervix particularly hard… and he stopped. 
“What…” she asked dreamily. 
“You’re so tender and soft, I don’t wanna hurt you.” His face was hovering mere inches above her, as he was searching for more cues. Still inside her to the hilt, the blissful feeling of her velvety walls caressing his cock still lingered and it took all his will to keep himself from moving momentarily. His hips jerked involuntarily and she responded by deliberately tightening around him, making him hiss. 
“You’re not hurting me,” she mumbled, rubbing her cheek against his shoulder. “I don’t even know if I ever felt this good. I’ve been waiting for this for so long…” Her own words made her freeze. She opened her eyes again and looked at him, frightened. His own expression was somber and almost unreadable. Oh god, you stupid cow, why did you say that? 
“How long, Y/N?”
Please, don’t make me ruin this even more, Josh. Just go on, just let me feel this at least once… 
His eyes never looked more beautiful. He kept looking down at her, searching for the answer. She knew she should say something, but the sudden lump in her throat made her only gasp for air as she tried to fight off the tears. Stupid, unstable bitch!
It seemed that he took mercy on her. Instead of pushing the subject, he leaned down and pressed his lips on the pulsing point under the skin of her neck. She closed her eyes and sighed in delight, waiting for him to resume the previous pace and make her mind go blank once more, letting her dream about her sun before the real one would come. 
He remained still though. His dick twitched inside her, making it known that he too wanted more, but he wasn’t merciful enough. And he wouldn’t let it go. 
“How long, Y/N?” Josh whispered once again against her skin. Each syllable was like a kiss, soothing. He left a physical trace of his words along her jugular, smoothing the gravity of that question mark with the tip of his nose. There was a new kind of urgency in his voice. At last, as if really reading her mind, he finally moved inside her once again, rolling his hips slowly as if to say ‘I’m not going anywhere’, encouraging her. 
“Since the first matcha tea,” she sobbed and he tried to soothe her nerves with yet another slow and deep thrust. But it was no use, the dam that had been holding her pent up emotions broke. He pulled out and lied down beside her. She missed him instantly but had enough dignity not to beg. She expected him to get up and leave. Instead, he pulled her closer and patiently waited for her to calm down. Only then he spoke.
“Y/N, he left because he…he thought that I liked you a bit too much. And, uh, after I called you and you came to me that night, I realized he might have been right…”
Josh was crying, he was yelling, he even tried to beg eventually, as the warm spring breeze coming from the open window suddenly felt like a winter gale on his exposed skin. He kept repeating ‘what does it mean, what do you mean…’, only to be told that it was up to him to figure it out. ‘But I love you!’ Josh cried some more, and it was met with silence for the first time.  ‘I can no longer say it back,’ he broke that silence after a while, and Josh’s hopeful eyes veiled with even more tears. ‘I wanted to be the only one. I’m not an idiot, so I beg you to stop treating me like one. Goodbye, Josh.’ 
And once again, Josh’s words were met with silence. The only difference was that she wanted to scream it back. “I’m so sorry,” she said instead after a long minute. “I didn’t want to be the reason for his leaving.”
“Y/N…” he inched closer and buried his face in her still damp hair. “You weren’t. I was. Didn’t you hear me?” 
She did, but her self destructive mind chose to ignore it. His cryptic might-have-beens couldn’t penetrate the armor that she had spent long years building. Thankfully, he knew her well enough to realize his mistake. Enough of all this beating around the bush. 
“I love you,” he whispered in her ear and this time it made her skin tingle and her toes curl. 
His caressing hand traveled from her shoulder down the middle of her chest, where he could feel the fast rhythm of her wildly beating heart. Her eyes were closer and she lay unmoving, except for her hand that wrapped around his fingers, stopping them momentarily. “I’m sorry babe, I just had to say it,” he continued. “And since you…”
“I love you more than life.” Her own words startled her, as if something fell down with a crash. Without waiting for him to make another move, she pulled his hand down to her wet pussy and his middle finger slid inside with ease. 
It quickly made him hard again. She spread her legs, inviting him back in. He shifted just a bit, with his head still resting next to hers on the pillow. She turned towards him, threw her leg around him and he entered her again just as their mouths reconnected again in a hungry, sloppy kiss. 
It was slow this time, but no less intense, with their senses heightened by the recent revelations. They were making love. She kept her eyes open, watching how his own rolled up and he moaned loudly with his tongue still swirling around hers, their parted lips barely touching. She could feel a second orgasm building soon and her breathing quickened, turning her own moans into short, high pitched gasps, making him hiss when her fingernails dug deep into his skin. 
Suddenly, he shifted and straightened, sliding his knees under her legs and grabbing her hips possessively. “That’s it baby, one more, go on, let go,” he urged and started thrusting into her with a new force that made her thighs tremble. She looked up and her jaw slackened at the sight. Her sweet and radiant Josh looked almost demonic in the twilight. He was watching her too, with his jaw clenched and his brows furrowed and glistening with sweat. 
“Harder,” she cried out and he obeyed, hissing and baring his teeth as he tried to hold on a little longer. Then suddenly, she could feel it snap and her whole body tensed, making him groan as she squeezed him inside her. A few more deep strokes before she could feel him falter. “Fill me up,” she whispered and her eyes widened. He placed his hand between her breasts, bent his head down and let out a long, high pitched whine, his body jerking erratically as he spilled inside her. Then he collapsed on top of her, panting. 
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Josh
She looked like an injured doe, you know? So lonely and abandoned behind that counter. The room was full of people of all sorts, but – as it often happens – nobody paid attention to the things that desperately needed all the attention in the world. So I stayed a while – even though I didn’t really have to – watching her face brighten up, growing more and more beautiful with every passing second. I knew she had it in her.
Someone ordered an irish coffee and she had to grab a bottle of whisky from the upper shelf. That’s when I saw the scars on her wrists, and the shadows behind her deep blue eyes suddenly made perfect sense. 
There are millions of people on this planet who are hurting and I’ve always believed that nothing happens without a reason. When I was younger, I wished I could have saved everyone, but that’s impossible. There’s only so much burden one can bear. But I believe that every wounded soul has their person somewhere. A sibling, a parent, a friend, a lover… Someone willing to share the load. Sometimes they don’t find each other in time, otherwise the world wouldn’t be full of tragedies and tears. Sometimes you don’t choose it. It just happens. And sometimes, you fuck up in the process. Colossally, even. I’m painfully aware of the fact that I did, too. But everything happens for a reason. 
I just had to go back…
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I can't imagine how it is To be forbidden from loving (ah, ah) 'Cause when you walked into my life I could feel my life begin And then I learned the truth How everything good in life seems to lead back to you And every single time I run into your arms I feel like I exist for love Only for love (Aurora – Exist For Love)
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@thewritingbeforesunrise @fleet-of-fiction @writingcold @lvnterninthenight @its-interesting-van-kleep   @takenbythemadness   @edgingthedarkness @myownparadise96 @gvfstuddedmajesty @jazzyfigz @sanguinebats @josh-iamyour-mama @lyndz2names @wetkleenex-gvf @peaceloveunitygvf @cheersdannyx2 @fleetingjake @lizzys-sunflower @emojakekiszka @gvfmarge @Dayumclarizzel @lipstickitty @clownstarr @gretasfallingsky @musicislove3389 @i-love-gvf @psychedelectable
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indigogvf · 1 year ago
Text
How can you not see it?
Authors note: this is my first time writing smut!! Any feedback/thoughts are much appreciated but please be nice :)
Warnings: 18+, minors dni. Angst (i cant help myself🤭), fluff, drinking, swearing. Let me know if I missed anything!
Word count: 2.7k
Summary: After being fuck buddies with Josh for a few months, he begins to act out when he sees a man buy you a drink. Is this little arrangement between you over, or does it turn into something more?
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You walked up to the bar, standing there for no longer than two seconds before an unfamiliar arm snaked around your waist. “This one’s on me. A pretty girl like you shouldn’t be paying for their own drinks, hm?”
‘Okay, gross…’ you thought, turning to look at him. He had dark brown hair that was gelled to the side, brown eyes with slight stubble on his face. I mean, he wasn’t ugly, but that pick-up line was plain nasty.
“I’m okay, thanks though.” You presented a closed lipped smile in hopes that your bluntness would deter him.
You were wrong.
“C’mon, just one drink. I’ll leave you alone after that, I promise.” He asked, looking at you hopefully.
‘Maybe he isn’t so bad, I mean that’s a pretty reasonable offer.’ Looking over the man’s shoulder, you caught Josh’s eyes burning into you.
“Okay, just one drink, but you have to leave me alone after that.” Accepting his compromise, you took a seat at the bar whilst he ordered you a drink. You caught Josh’s eyes again, noticing that he appeared to be angry. You and Josh have been sleeping together for a few months now, but so far, it has been nothing serious.
It happened at the end of the last tour, when he was pent up after a show and had absolutely no shame in asking for your help in the midst of his desperation. There was no denying that Josh is attractive, and you’d always had a small thing for him, so you happily obliged. But then, it carried on, which isn’t necessarily a problem, but he’s a very confusing person. You know that he’s only using you for a quick fuck, but considering your friendship, you assumed he’d have a tad more respect. You are painfully aware that sex is all it is to him, but you can’t help feeling hurt at times, especially when he has no shame in chatting up random girls when you go out somewhere. You’ve had plenty of opportunities to do the same, but stopped yourself out of respect for Josh.
However, it had been a week since you and Josh last had sex, and the guy currently chatting you up seemed nice enough. You didn’t have any intention of sleeping with him, but it was nice to share a drink with someone, even if it was not the person you wanted to be with.
You finished your drink and said your goodbyes to the guy at the bar, who you never actually caught the name of. Or maybe you did… you can’t remember, and truthfully, you don’t really care. You headed back to the group, which only consisted of you, Josh, Jake, Danny, and Sam. “Who was that?” Jake asked, sharing an intrigued look with the rest of them.
“Just some guy, he said he’d buy me a drink and then leave me alone. Seemed like a fair deal and he was nice enough.” You looked around, and it seemed like your answer was satisfactory. Until you landed on Josh, who was still wearing the same grumpy look. You frowned at him, wondering what his problem was. He caught your gaze and rolled his eyes.
‘What is his problem?’ You thought, frustrated with the lack of communication.
“Where are we going after this?” You asked, trying to avoid Josh’s stare.
“You’re not going home with that guy?” Josh asked, hints of sarcasm seeping through his already harsh tone. You were dumbfounded, Josh never acts this way.
“Excuse me?” You asked, pure confusion evident in your tone.
“I don’t know. You seemed pretty content with him.” You looked around trying to gauge everyone else’s reaction, which was seemingly the same as yours.
“I already told you, he bought me one drink and promised to leave me alone. If he hadn’t made the promise of leaving me alone I would have been opposed to the idea, but he did. It was a harmless drink.” You spoke calmly despite the anger that was flowing through your veins.
‘This is unbelievable! Since when is this a problem for him? He has no issues chatting up girls, but when I have a harmless drink with someone he acts like I’ve committed adultery in a marriage that doesn’t even exist.’ You were fuming, but doing a good job of hiding it.
“Could’ve fooled me” he responded, sarcasm dripping from his words.
“Josh, chill out. Let’s just go back to mine because it's the closest.” Danny pipes up. You weren’t even sure you wanted to stay out after the way Josh has been acting. It was awkward now, no one was really sure of what to say because no one knew what was wrong.
“I think I might just head home for the night. This has been really nice though, we need to make more of an effort to do this more often.” You hoped that they wouldn’t question it. Josh had entirely sucked the fun out of the night and your mood to socialise had gone down the drain. They all protested, asking you to stay just a couple more hours. Josh stayed silent, confirming that he was still in his pathetic little mood. That gave you even more reason to leave, so you did. You all said goodbye and they subtly told you to just ignore Josh and that he’d get over whatever was bothering him.
As soon as you got home you stripped from your restricting skirt and top and got in the shower. The warmth felt so good, releasing all the built up tension from Josh’s digs at you. It started to dawn on you that maybe the whole arrangement you had with Josh was a bad idea. Realistically, it’s never a good idea to sleep with your friends without the intention of more. But, it was going fine, it hadn’t affected your friendship at all until now. You wonder what had changed.
You reluctantly got out the shower and put on your comfiest pyjamas. Then, you ordered some takeout, which is a necessity after a night of drinking. It was still quite early and you weren’t going to go to sleep for a few more hours, so you poured yourself a nice, full glass of wine. You heard a knock at the door before you could enjoy.
‘That was quick…’ you opened the door and was met with Josh’s familiar face. ‘Fucking brilliant.’
“What do you want now? To ruin the rest of my night, too?” You asked. He scoffed and rolled his eyes.
“No, I was going to apologise but it seems you’re still clinging on to whatever it was I did.” You audibly laughed in his face.
‘Unbelievable. Is he serious? This is so obviously because the rest of them forced him to come and apologise.’ You theorized.
“Seriously, Josh? You were rude. You have no problems chatting up women at bars and I never bat an eyelid. Was it shitty to watch? Sure! But I have no reason to stop you because we are not together. We fuck Josh, that’s the extent of it. We’re friends who fuck. Why is it a problem when I have a drink with someone? I was never going to agree in the first place out of respect for you. I’ve had plenty of opportunities to go home with someone, but I haven’t, because despite the fact that we aren't together, we’re friends. But it’s only fair if I get to talk to other guys. I don’t know what your problem is, but our little arrangement is done. It’s clearly affecting our friendship and you seem to be able to get a good fuck whenever you want, so you obviously don’t need me for that. Now, if you’re not going to sincerely apologise for your pathetic behaviour, I’d like you to leave before my food gets here.” He stared at you, mouth agape in shock. All of the emotions you just poured out started to sink in, and it’s became overwhelming. You hold back the tears and wait for him to respond.
‘Why is this getting to me so mu-‘
“I love you! Jesus, how can you not see it? I’m head over heels for you. Have you never noticed how I always take care of you after we have sex? I stay with you every single time. Have you never noticed the way I look at you every opportunity I get? Have you never thought about why I always get you the most meaningful gifts compared to everyone else? Or why I always sit next to you when we go out? I’m in love with you. I never meant for us sleeping together to become a regular thing, but having you as something more than a friend was better than just being seen as a friend by you, even if it was just as a fuck buddy. The way I acted tonight was wrong and unfair, and you’re right. You should be able to talk to whoever you want because that’s exactly what I do. I’m sorry.”
You were shocked to say the least, but it made sense. Everything made sense. You love him. That’s why it always bothered you to see him talking to other girls. As you stared at him completely baffled, your food arrived, which was honestly perfect timing. It brought you back to reality. You invited Josh into your home and sat down with him, “please say something, you’ve been silent for way too long”
“I’m sorry. I just- it all makes sense now.” You thought about the best way to go about this. You weren’t exactly planning on admitting your feelings for Josh tonight, specifically because you are admitting to feelings that you didn’t even realise you had until five minutes ago. ‘Fuck it.’ “I love you too. I didnt even realise, but it makes sense. It hurt to see you talk to other girls, knowing you could pull any of them whenever you wanted. I just didn’t put the pieces together.” You stared up at him, and you couldn’t stop yourself.
You grabbed his collar and pulled him into you, kissing him with so much force that it made your head spin. He gladly reciprocated. Your mouths moved in sync as his tongue swiped your bottom lip, asking for entrance, which you granted. He pushed you further into the couch, and you wrapped your legs around his waist bringing him in closer. This felt so different; it wasn’t just need and desperation; the atmosphere was filled with love and passion. He groaned into your mouth as you started grinding your hips on him, looking for some type of friction to ease the aching sensation. You could feel how hard he was.
He pulled away to remove your top and groaned when he realised you weren’t wearing a bra. “Fuck. You’re so pretty, mama.” You smiled at him as you moved your hands to his waist and attempted to unbutton his pants when he stopped you, “No. Let me make you feel good, first.” He removed your pants, leaving you completely naked below him. He ran his fingers through your folds collecting the wetness. “All of this for me?” You moaned at the feeling of his fingers on you, bucking your hips to try and get some friction on your aching clit.
“Only for you, Josh” he pushed a finger inside of you, eliciting a moan that was louder than intended. He was moving at an antagonizing pace. “Please, Josh.” You whined. You needed more, you were so desperate for something.
“Please what, baby?”
“I need more. Please.” He pushed another finger into you, increasing his speed. “Fuck! That feels so good.” You moaned. You could feel the warmth blossoming in your belly, getting closer and closer to your release. He knew it, he knew your body so well. He could feel you squeezing his fingers, and just as you were about to come, he removed them. “No! No, no. Please Josh. I was so close”
“Soon, mama. Let me take care of you.” he leaned in, kissing you much softer than before. You whined into his mouth, bucking your hips in an attempt to relieve your desperation. He was just as desperate as you, if not more. You could feel the heat radiating from his cock.
“I need you Josh. I need your cock, please.” You begged. He pulled down his pants along with his boxers and released his achingly hard cock. His head was red and dripping with pre cum, begging to be touched. You reached your hand down and stroked him delicately. “Fuck. Your hands feel so good, baby, but I need to be inside of you.” He lined his cock up with your entrance and bottomed out. You both groaned in sync. He was stretching you out so good.
“Please move Josh.” You begged, and he obliged. He moved slowly, picking up his pace. This was different, he was going slow but so deep compared to usual, where he would mercilessly fuck you. You used your legs that were wrapped around his waist to bring him in closer, digging your nails into his back. He moaned into your neck, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine. Your orgasm was approaching quickly after having it taken away a mere five minutes ago. It was so rushed but you couldn’t care less, you just needed him.
“Faster Josh, I’m so close. Fuck!” He did as he was asked, thrusting into you faster. He grabbed your leg and chucked it over his shoulder, somehow achieving an even deeper angle than before. “Jesus Christ, Josh. You feel so good.” Your head rolled back into the cushions behind you as you quickly approached your long awaited orgasm.
“You gonna come for me? Give it to me, mama. I need to feel you come around my cock.” Josh’s words of encouragement threw you over the edge and caused you to come, hard. You don’t even know if you were actually saying anything or if you were just making noises, but you didn’t care. He fucked you through it, picking up his pace as he chased his own orgasm. “I’m close, baby. Can you give me one more?” You nearly cried when he said that. You were beyond fucked out, the alcohol from earlier starting to tire you out.
“I can’t, Josh.” You whined. His hips were faltering now, giving him away. His eyes were screwed shut and his mouth was hanging open. “You can, I know you can. C’mon, mama. Just one more for me. You feel so good. Be good for me, please” his voice was strained, which encouraged you even more. You could feel yourself getting closer. He reached his hand down to your clit and within seconds you were coming again. You saw stars, your legs clamped around his waist even harder as you came. You were shouting his name like a mantra as he thrusted into you at a merciless pace, chasing his own release. You felt him twitch inside of you.
“Fuck! I’m gonna come” he groaned as he stilled inside of you, releasing his hot spurts of cum. His head dropped to the crook of your neck as he worked himself through his orgasm. You both stilled as you caught your breath and he rolled off of you.
He wrapped his arms around you and brought you closer, kissing your forehead gently. “I’m sorry for earlier. I love you.” You smiled up at him and ran your fingers through his hair.
“It’s okay. I love you too, Josh.” You cuddled into him.
‘This feels so right.’ He leaned down and pressed a delicate kiss to your lips whilst he caressed your face. He pulled away and his eyes were filled with nothing but love.
“How does a shower sound?” He suggested, a cheeky glint in his eyes. You grinned up at him and peeled yourself away from his embrace. “I’ll race you.” You giggled, quickly getting up and giving yourself a head start.
“Oh, you’re on!” He chased after you, laughing to himself.
‘This feels so right.’ He thought, too.
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builtbybrokenbells · 9 months ago
Text
LEX TALIONIS | ORSUS
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orsus — a beginning, commencement, an undertaking, attempt
Masterlist | Taglist
listen while reading: it will come back - hozier
Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader, Josh Kiszka x f!reader
Word Count: 24k (😘)
Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, semi-public sex, hookups, one night stands, fingering (f!receiving) oral (f!receiving), impact play, cum play, sir kink, dom/sub, bratty sub, praise, degradation, name calling, touch of spit play, lots and lots of dirty talk, mentions of free use kink, choking, biting, orgasm denial, multiple orgasms, the briefest mention of oral (m!receiving), manipulation/manipulative phrases, gaslighting, toxic themes, an unbearable amount of flirting, talking bad about men, superiority complexes, mentions of toxic/bad past relationships/bad experiences with men, a conniving evil reader, mentions of cheating/infidelity/home wrecking, mentions of addictions/substance abuse, mentions of death/dying, drinking, swearing, sorry if i miss any!
Here it is, I hope you enjoy my loves 🤍 (lightly edited)
According to Wikipedia, brotherhood is an ethical relationship between people, which is based on love and solidarity. According to the Oxford Dictionary, it is the feeling of kinship with and closeness to a group or all people. To the core, brotherhood is family, whether blood or not. A brother is someone you would give your life for at the drop of a dime, someone who you would protect with your life and avenge with a fervor. You can be siblings, cut from the same cloth and raised side by side, yet never once feel such things. You can meet a person on the sidewalk amidst the city chaos and feel for them in a moment, what you could not feel for someone else in a lifetime. Brotherhood is not a right, but a privilege, and one so sacred that not many are truly deserving of the title.
For Joshua and Jacob, brotherhood began in the womb, and carried on well into their adult lives. In this particular instance, deserving was not nearly a good enough descriptor for the men in question.
Two souls destined to be infinitely intertwined and lucky enough to be born as twins. For the pair, loyalty was without question and love was always abundant. Since their first minute on earth, they knew that the world would always seem less cruel when there was someone to depend on walking beside you every step of the way. In their younger years, they were akin in so many ways that it was hard to comprehend by times, and as the years passed, it only further proved the two were identical in more ways than just physical. Morals, attitudes and interests were shared, as well as dreams and desires. Even in their differences, they were determined to support each others dreams as if it were their very own aspirations.
The love the two had for each other was hard to comprehend, especially if you had never felt something so strongly before, and sometimes, it was easy to feel jealousy at the sight of the two together. It appeared as though they were the only two people in the world, and the only person the other cared about. Although their bond was strong, they had room in their hearts for more than just each other. Despite their differences, and the fact that they understood each other best, they both loved fiercely and deeply, and that love extended far beyond themselves. They loved their siblings, their parents, and their friends. They loved the bugs burrowing in the soil in the front yard, and the birds that flew overhead. They loved the trees and the rivers, the flowers and even the pesky weeds that grew at an unprecedented rate.
Love, by times, seemed like the only thing the two boys knew how to do. As they grew, so did their hearts, and that was one thing that never seemed to flee them.
When they lost their childlike nature, turning into awkward pre-teens with gangly limbs and cracking voices, the differences began to emerge. Jake, who loved to pick away at his father’s old guitar, seemed to take the side of reservation. He watched often, yet only spoke sometimes (unless of course, he cornered you with a topic that he had a staggering amount of passion for). He fell in love with the six stringed instrument, and all of the girls in his grade in high school. He was shy, but he was always lending an ear to anyone in need. Often quick with a joke and developing an awful habit for flirting, he seemed to make everyone fall in love with him without ever needing to try. His mystery aided his charm, and cemented his memory in people's minds.
Josh, who did not care who you were or where you came from, would talk your ear off about anything and everything that came to mind. His smile was always bright, and his heart was written on his sleeve. He took to the theater, and sang along to whatever song Jake had learned to play that week. He was a socialite who loved company, and seemed to bring out the extrovert in Jake when the two spent enough time in close proximity. He too, made people fall in love but for much different reasons than his brother. He was kind, generous, and extravagant. People fell because it was hard to keep your eyes off of him.
The sun and the moon respectively, making the whole world fall to their feet without ever realizing it.
As they grew into young adults, their personalities seemed to stick, only ever growing more intense as the days went on. Although the two seemed to have grown into different people, if you cared to look close enough, the similarities were not hard to find. In their faces, of course, it was not hard to tell that they were twin brothers, but it was more than that. In the warm brown of their irises, when they looked at you for too long, the same feeling would wash over you; like comfort on a cold day, or sleep to the exhausted. Their charm, unruly yet soft and subtle, would sneak up on you and sink its claws deep into your skin before you would even notice. In their touch, the same searing sensation and intoxicating feeling. The two were more alike than what showed on the surface, and you could easily find it if you had enough dedication to discovery.
More than anything else, their bond steadily grew stronger as they grew older. Brotherhood to them was not a title, nor was it a given. It was a lifestyle, and something they chose to do every minute of every day. Caring, loving, and understanding each other was of great importance to them, and it certainly was not easy work. They could have succumbed to sibling rivalry, quarrels that carried over into adulthood and bred resentment, but it was not something that they wanted for themselves. Their relationship was of utmost importance, and they made sure that anyone who stepped foot into their lives understood the requirement of loving both of them just the same.
They would always be each other’s biggest supporters, cheering them on in every aspect of life. They would be best friends, there to share every moment of happiness and suffer through every failure. They would be the ones to dish out the hard truths, and the harshest advice when needed. They were anchors, keeping each other grounded when life began to spin out of control. It was important for them to maintain the strength of their relationship, especially when living such a crazy and difficult lifestyle. Traveling the world and playing music was a dream come true, but it was even more so to them because they could share it with the people they cared about most, but it was strenuous and tiresome. It was easy to get buried under the stress and neglect their own health and wellbeing. It was easy for relationships to fail and for people to forget about them while they were gone for months at a time, which was exactly why family was so important to them. Without each other, they would crack and crumble under the pressure of the world.
A love like such only comes once in a lifetime, and the two felt incredibly lucky to be able to have it from the moment that they were born, until the very last breath. Even after death, they knew that their love would carry on, and they would search for each other in every lifetime to come. A bond so strong was not something to take for granted, and not something that you would ever want to let go of.
On the other hand, there are some people in the world who simply can not comprehend what it’s like to feel such a bond, nor can they comprehend how to care for someone more, or even equally to how they feel about themselves. You can call it narcissistic, but in some cases, it’s rarely ever that intense. It boils down to the fact of routine, and in some instances, people spend years without ever meeting anyone who could make them feel so strongly. Decades spent on their lonesome, having to stand up for themselves and watch over their own shoulder with nobody else to help carry the burden. Countless days of loneliness, constantly attempting to find new ways to cope and distract. Never anyone to share the success with, and no shoulder to cry on when times get tough. After a while, the idea of letting someone else experience such things alongside you becomes more of a fear than it is a comfort.
These people, as we have all have met, are known best as sharks or snakes; always awaiting the chance to steal an opportunity for themselves, and forever willing to throw someone else under the bus to achieve it. They are crude, unapologetic, and arrogant creatures who are often perceived as the enemy. In most instances, they are, and it is important to know that although sad, the reasoning behind their actions does not excuse their behavior. They are usually aware of their own actions, and most of the time, have little care for the people they hurt in the process. After all, how can you care about another when you’ve spent an entire lifetime only ever concerned about yourself?
You, a lovely woman on the surface, yet a nightmare just below, was a prime example of such evil.
You had spent an entire lifetime trying to find someone who made your heart beat faster. You longed to find someone who could turn your world upside down, or even someone who would promise to stick by your side during the hardest of times. Quickly, you understood that most people were willing to promise, but never follow through. In your younger years, you had your heart broken and your earth shattered by men and female friends who did not truly care about you as a person. For some time, you continued on the search despite the aching of your own chest, dedicated to knowing someone completely and wholly. After a while, you began to realize that the likelihood of finding such a person was near zero.
So, once you moved to a new city and started over, you decided that life could only begin again if every part of you was reinvented. At first, it was difficult to train your brain to think differently than it always had, but in truth, it did not take too long before you had learned the art of simply not caring. You realized that your heart had been your downfall the whole time; the relentless pining, the constant searching, and the endless begging for someone to love you. Other people had never been your issue, because you should have known better than to put your trust in anyone other than yourself. By closing yourself off and leaving dependency behind, you had managed to find happiness after all, and it did not come in the form of a man with a bouquet of flowers in his hand and sweet nothings stuck in his teeth.
Instead of being the victim of heartbreak, you had turned yourself into a heartbreaker. It was a cruel world that was only survivable if you were crueler, so you did what you had to do. The first few times were trial and error; you took people on dates and brought them back to your apartment for nothing further than mediocre sex. In the morning, you pushed them out the door with a smile, and answered a few texts here and there until you found the courage to cut them off. Every so often, you caved and fell back into your old habits, feeling guilty for being so harsh. You’d let them come back for another night of unfulfillment and only then would you find the courage to hit the block button.
Eventually, it became easier, and much more fun. You learned to seek out the men who you knew would be good in bed, rather than the ones who claimed to be good in bed. The quiet ones, talking sweetly and sometimes even nervously seemed to be the ones with the most breathtaking performances. You were nicer than you wanted to be, but after a while, even that seemed to flee you, too. You became witty, smart-mouthed and bold, testing your limits with every interaction. Your sharp tongue and your fiery eyes made people fall to your feet, and you began to understand that playing nice had never got you what you wanted. Now, sex was the only thing that caught your attention, and good sex was the only thing that could keep your attention. Rarely did you ever find yourself looking for a second date or a lasting relationship, and the longer you continued on your warpath, the more you felt like you were losing your humanity.
Men at bars appeared less as people, and more like conquests. It quickly turned into a game for you, and remorse was an emotion you no longer knew how to feel. Occasionally, you would make bets with your only acquaintances you’d made since moving to the city, just to see how fast you could get someone in your bed (or better, the bathroom). It was fun for you, but every man you left behind seemed dazed and confused, wondering if the moment was real or only a figment of their imagination. They only had a first name, never a last and definitely no phone number to call. You cashed out your earnings on cheap tequila shots and moved on to the next bar before they could catch up to you.
To some, it was a sad lifestyle to live, yet you never seemed to see the issue. You were so angry and bitter about the poor treatment you had received in the past that it blinded you enough to ignore the damage you caused. Then again, it was uncertain that if you did know how much turmoil you had caused, if you would even feel bad about it at all. You’d taken a liking to your newest personality, one in which you always got what you want and did not back down until you had it, and one in which your needs were always met first. After twenty some odd years of being on the receiving end of pain, you didn’t mind dishing it out every now and again.
After all, not every person who fell victim to your charm was upset with the lack of a second date. Most were quite content with a simple hookup, and you were certain that plenty were even in search of that alone. The ones that did get their feelings hurt were most likely over it in the morning, and the girlfriends of your conquests should have realized how terrible their boyfriends were long before you were ever involved in the equation. Not your man, not your problem, as you liked to believe.
Whatever could be used as an excuse for your abhorrent actions was made into one of your many personal mantras.
And so it was a Saturday night, the summer heat sweltering outside the Nashville bar and pooling inside every time the door was opened. The music was loud, the bass pounding in your ear drums and rattling your bones. The spot was busy, but no more than it usually was, and you were lined up at the counter with your aforementioned acquaintances while you waited to be served. Although, acquaintance was a strong term for the people you regularly spent time with, as they were no more than strangers who you drank with at the bar every now and again. The only reason you could stand to be around each other was because you adorned the same poisonous outlook, and your feelings could not be hurt when you were already prepared for the worst.
“Look, there’s one for you, Olivia.” You pointed across the room to a tall man hovering by the dance floor. He had a beer gripped tightly in his hand as he overlooked the crowd, hoping to find a potential suitor.
“Why don’t you want him?” She asked, raising an eyebrow as she looked in the direction you were pointing to.
“We just got here. I have to keep my options open, and he’s not my type.” You chuckled, neglecting any form of eye contact with her. You played the same trick on her every time you went out, and she hadn’t seemed to catch on to it yet. Her fragile ego made it easy to convince her to take the average looking ones so you could save the best for yourself. “Besides, he’s your type, isn’t he? Tall, blonde…” you trailed off, refusing to mention his mediocre looks and his apparent lack of brains.
“Yeah, I guess he is.” She nodded, flashing you a smile. “Thanks!”
There were two types of women who loved the lifestyle you had chosen for yourself; those who had too much self confidence, and those who had been stripped of it and were in desperate search of it.
“Anytime.” You forced a smile, trying to keep up the facade that it was out of the kindness of your heart. You turned back towards the bartender, staring him down in hopes he would reach you faster. He was busy serving a plethora of drinks to a group of young girls who you doubted were of legal drinking age. When he finished up, he caught your eye and you gave him a smile, doing everything you could to convince him to serve you next. Luckily, it seemed to draw him in, and within seconds he was walking your way.
“What can I get you, darlin’?” He asked, his southern accent hanging thick in the air as he took his time looking you up and down. He was young, but still seemed a bit older than you. He had a cute smile, and a seemingly muscular build. Attractive, but definitely not what you were in search of. You leaned forward over the bar top slightly, ensuring he could get a good look down the front of your low cut dress, hoping the sight would persuade him to give you the first drink on the house.
It didn’t work all of the time, but definitely enough for you to try your luck.
“Double vodka cranberry, please.” You gave a soft smile, batting your eyelashes a time or two to add some extra sweetness. “And a shot of tequila, too.” He took a long look over your face, taking in the sultry stare and the subtle gloss on your lips. The small upturn of the corners of your mouth led him to believe that you were up to no good, but the mischief sparkling in your eyes intrigued him beyond belief. Paired with the soft skin exposed on your neck and chest, illuminated even under the dim bar light, he was enamoured enough to trip over himself to please you.
“Anything else?” He asked, looking up to meet your eyes.
“No, I think that’s fine for now.” You assured him. Without any further comment, he turned towards the wall of alcohol to grab the bottle of vodka. You drummed your fingers against the tabletop as you watched him mix your drink, biting back a smirk as you watched him overpour the shots ever so slightly. When he turned around, you pretended to search through your purse to grab your card. As your fingers closed around the thin plastic, he held his hand out to stop you.
“First one’s on me.” He smiled.
“Are you sure?” You questioned half-heartedly, trying to feign some air of surprise.
“Positive.” He assured you, sliding them your way.
“Thanks, honey.” You flashed a smile, sliding the shot glass and salt shaker towards you. You licked the back of your hand, shaking a few grains of salt on to it before grabbing the tequila. As you raised the shot glass to your lips, you licked the salt off your skin and threw your head back, swallowing down the liquid. Before the taste could overwhelm you, you placed the lime wedge between your lips and sucked the juice from it. You placed the glass back down on the table, sending the bartender a subtle wink upon realizing he was watching the whole ordeal. Without another word, you grabbed your mixed drink and took a sip from it, washing the harsh tequila from your tongue.
As you turned around, you intended to step away from the bar and make your way towards the small stage, where there looked to be a band preparing their instruments for a soundcheck. Before you could, your eyes landed upon something much more intriguing than the amateur music group hoping to make their big break. There was a man, not very tall, yet appeared to be the most attention grabbing thing in the entire room, and inexplicably charismatic without even knowing it. He was not looking in your direction, but you wished he was, and upon catching sight of his soft and inviting features, you knew you would make it a point to make him notice you before the night was through. The dumb blonde nursing his third beer and already bordering intoxication was not your type, nor was the overly flirty bartender, but whoever was standing amidst the chaos of the crowd, whiskey glass tucked neatly in his hand and brown hair flowing gracefully off his shoulder, definitely was.
He was in blue jeans that appeared to be very worn. The knees and thighs had turned near white with how thin the denim had grown. The fabric hung from his figure slightly, cuffed at his ankles to show off the expensive looking brown boots he was wearing. On his upper half was a black button up, only tucked into his jeans on one side while the other hung down loosely over his hip. The top two buttons were undone, showing a flash of tanned skin from his chest. It made your mouth water, and it made you curious to see the rest of him. His face, when you finally had the opportunity to see the whole picture, seemed to take your breath away. His smile held a playful joy that was almost infectious, and his eyes were warm and only ever seemed to draw you in further.
You decided at that moment, it was imperative that you take the opportunity that was presented to you.
You were never one to jump first, but this time, you couldn’t seem to resist the temptation. Usually, you loved drawing them into you, to enchant them enough to make them approach you. You thought it was entertaining to watch them stutter over their words as they tried to persuade you of their intent. This time, you knew that this was a game where time was of essence, and if you did not jump at the chance, someone else would definitely beat you to it. You weren’t sure about his game, or if he was one with undying loyalty to a woman who did not want to be with him that night. You were unsure if he was already stuck in a game of flirtation with another woman at the bar, or if maybe, you were not his type at all. No matter, you still believed it to be your best bet to try, because leaving without a piece of him was not something you were willing to do, or at least do happily.
You drew in a long breath, swiping your tongue over your front teeth to ensure there was no lipstick smudged on them. Then, you ran a finger through your curled hair, arranging it neatly to frame your face. You took a sip of your drink, surveying the area to determine what the best move would be. He was next to a taller man with curly hair and a big nose, who was without a doubt, just as attractive. You decided that if you could not have your first choice, he would do it for you just the same.
A break in conversation allowed for you to make your move; the nameless boy turned away from his company for a moment, and then the taller boy seemed to abandon him in search of a booth on the other side of the bar. Before you could think up a line to deliver as you approached him, he took a step in your direction. Your stomach fluttered nervously and your heart sped as he continued moving towards the bar. You weren’t ready, but you weren’t willing to let it stop you from getting what you wanted. Instead, you turned towards the bar again and changed your course of action. You prayed that he would do exactly as you expected and come to stand beside you, because only then would you be able to make the first move.
After a few seconds of uncertainty, you had to bite back a smile when you felt a body present itself next to you. Immediately, before you even turned your head, you were hit with an intoxicating scent. Woody and deep, almost as if amber was delicately laced between the notes of sandalwood. Even with the heaviness, there seemed to be something light, almost like a citrus or a flowery smell. As if in an instant, your switch was flipped and you were ready to play. Slowly, you turned your head to the side and casted a careful glance at him. He had an empty glass in his hand, the ice melting due to the warmth of his palm surrounding it. Now that he was next to you, you could see the subtle gold of a hoop earring settled on his lobe, and a chain dangling loosely over his collarbones. There was a bracelet around his wrist and a ring sat on his middle finger. Suddenly you were overwhelmed by the idea of his fingers closed around your neck instead of the cup, and your stomach twisted into a knot.
The bartender seemed to be completely immersed in something, failing to notice his new customer. You smiled to yourself, wondering if you could use it to your advantage. The man had yet to notice your interest, and you were happy to keep it that way for a moment. The same bartender who had served you moments before passed by, not even giving the boy a second thought. He seemed to shift uncomfortably on his feet as he raised a hand to call him over, almost as if he was nervous to be rude. The bartender looked up for a moment, but continued on doing his previous task.
‘Perfect,’ you thought, sipping from your drink. The situation seemed to be resolving itself as the man beside you lowered his arm in defeat, tapping his fingers against the wood grain as he patiently waited his turn. You observed him as he did so, pitying him only slightly for his lack of confidence. You began to wonder if he was timid in all areas of his life, and if he was, how easy it would be to break him free from that chain. When the bartender took a step in your direction, intending to move past you to the customers at the other end of the line, you raised a hand to him and gave a sickly sweet smile. His eyes gave a sparkle as they landed upon your face, and his attention was quickly focused on nothing other than you. He cut towards you, ready to take your order again.
“Another shot?” He asked, already half-turned to grab the tequila bottle. You have a chuckle, shaking your head at him.
“My friend wanted to order, actually.” You said, nodding your head towards the boy beside you. “But I’ll take a shot too, once he gets his drink.”
“Oh, sure thing.” He said, averting his gaze to the person next to you instead. You felt a pair of eyes burning into you, but you did not want to look yet. Instead of addressing your notion of friendship, he cleared his throat and smiled at the man across the counter. He waited a moment before he spoke, wondering if you might have anything else to say. Eventually, he began to order and you listened intently to hear the sound.
“Double shot of Woodford, please.” He said, his tone low and gravelly. You could not ignore the rush of emotion that flooded you from the simple sound alone. “And I’ll get hers, too.” Now, you couldn’t resist the temptation to look at him. You shifted in place, turning towards him ever so slightly and catching his eye. Now that he was looking straight at you, his gaze heavy and his face close, you knew you had made the right choice. He was the only person in the whole bar that would be able to affect you with something as simple as a shared glance.
“Woodford?” You asked, your lip turning up into a smirk. “Expensive taste.”
“I can say the same about you.” He said, watching the bartender reach for a bottle of Don Julio. You gave a slight shrug, brushing off the comment. “Friends, eh?” He asked, addressing your earlier comment.
“Just figured you might want a drink.” You said, elusive to the real reason you’d called the bartender over. “Didn’t seem like he was very eager to serve you.”
“‘Preciate it, sweetheart.” He said, grabbing his drink from the counter as it was served. He swirled the ice around the glass for a moment, pondering his next words. “If we’re friends, I s’pose it would be nice to know your name.”
“Are you asking ‘cause you want to know, or ‘cause you feel like you have to?” You asked, raising an eyebrow as a shot was placed in front of you. Seconds later, a lime wedge and salt shaker was placed next to it. You looked over at him, noticing that he was still watching you. You’d caught his attention, and in the exact way you had been hoping to.
“I wouldn’t’ve asked if I didn’t care.” He said, taking a sip of the amber liquid in his cup. “I’ve never been the type to entertain people I’m not interested in.” He had a drawl to his words that you couldn’t quite wrap your head around. It didn’t sound like a southern accent, but then again, neither did your own. Perhaps both of you had come to Nashville to find a new life.
“So you’re interested?” You smirked, turning your head fully towards him now. He didn’t respond, instead taking another sip. “Y/n.” You said, smiling at his strong attitude. You liked it, and you appreciated the forward response. It made your job so much easier. “You?”
“Jake.” He said, seemingly pleased with your words. “And to answer your question, yes.” He grinned, setting his glass back down on the table. You took the opportunity to think over your next move while taking the shot he’d so kindly bought for you. You placed the empty shot glass back on the counter, sucking the juice from the lime as the burn traveled from your chest to the pit of your stomach.
“Jake,” You pondered the name, imagining nothing good as it infiltrated your mind. You imagined how it would sound, laced delicately around your tongue with his head between your legs. You wondered how it would hang in the air, heavy amidst the desire that would surround you two. “I like it.” You deducted, understanding that all of the aforementioned things would come to life before the night was through.
“I’m glad.” He let out a small laugh, looking over your face for a moment. There was a twinkle in his eye that you couldn’t quite place. It wasn’t mischievous, but almost seemed to be devious, like he was thinking and planning the exact same things you were. “Are you here with anyone tonight?”
“That depends.” You said, taking a sip from your straw, washing down the bitter lime and lingering tequila. “What kind of company are you wondering about?” You looked over at him, noticing his eyes still lingering over you. He gave you a small smirk, understanding that elusiveness was a part of your charm. He didn’t seem bothered by your indirect response, and if anything, he found it intriguing.
“The kind that takes you home with them at the end of the night.” His counter for your mystique was to be blunt, which did catch you off guard. For someone who seemed timid at a distance, he was awfully forward now that you were speaking. It made you wonder if you misjudged, or if he was hiding that part of him particularly well. You decided that if he was hiding it, it was for a reason, and one that you were rather eager to know about.
“No,” You shook your head. You debated elaborating, but decided to bite your tongue instead.
“Are you looking for someone to take you home, sweetheart?” He asked, pressing further as you watched him. “Is that why you were trying to get my attention?” You tried to keep a straight face as you pieced together his words. At face value, you took it as a general inquiry about the bartender, but you knew people better than to take anything at face value. He meant something deeper, but you didn’t want to mention it. You had faith in your ability to get him to cave, first.
“Wouldn’t say I was looking for your attention, honey. Seems as though it just happened.” You lied through your teeth, letting the accusation roll off your shoulders with ease. One of your biggest flaws was always responding to things as if it were an attack, and your defense was up; you wanted him, but not enough to bend to his will. You’d learned a long time ago that desperation was not a good look for you, and you much preferred it on someone else’s face.
“No?” He questioned, calling your bluff. “So you’re telling me you weren’t watching me earlier?” A prickle of indignation was felt in your spine as he spoke and you felt the need to correct him, even if he was right.
“Sneaky.” You muttered, your eyes flickering to his hand still wrapped around the glass. You couldn’t give up now, because that would leave him with the upper hand. Arguing seemed to be what he was hoping for, just so he could put you in your place, so you did the opposite; you admitted to the fact, but only to regain control of the situation. “You caught me.” You shrugged your shoulders, giving him an innocent smile. “So, what now?”
“Nothing,” he chuckled. “Just wanted to hear you say it.” You rolled your eyes at him, but it was playful. Something about him was less bothersome; if anyone else were to be playing the same cards, you would have walked away, but he had an odd sort of charm about him. Plus, his face certainly didn’t hurt the case. “That didn’t answer my first question, though.” He said, his gaze growing slightly stronger. “Are you looking for someone to take you home?”
“Is that an offer, or just your curiosity getting the best of you again?” He gave another low chuckle at your reluctance to answer.
“Both.” His answer was curt, but you appreciated it. “If you’re interested, of course.” Normally, you would have made him chase you a bit, or work a little harder than what he’d already done. Other times, you would have jumped his bones so fast that he wouldn’t know what hit him, just to leave him alone to ponder all that happened in the short time. Right now, you did not feel like doing either of those things. He had piqued your interest in the best possible way, and for once, you felt like talking, even if it was going to lead to the same old outcome.
In another universe, maybe you even would have bent your rules for him and pursued something more.
But, of course, fantasizing about an alternative universe is only ever harmful in the long run, especially if you aren’t willing to put in the work to alter the universe you’re already stuck in.
And you, a secret romantic buried deep under the surface who covered their own heartbreak by becoming a player, had never once considered putting in the work to change.
After all, why would you ever want to change when playing dirty was so much fun?
“I’ve never been the type of person to entertain someone I’m not interested in.” You smirked, throwing back the last of your drink as you let him digest his own words that you’d thrown so powerfully back in his face. As much as it seemed like a lie, it was not; you would never entertain a man you did not want to be with. You only cared for leading them on enough to get what you wanted, then pretending they did not exist.
“Happy to see we’re on the same page, then.” He chuckled, seeming like he wanted to move closer to you, but he held himself back.
“Where are you from, Jake?” You asked, taking the step for him and scooting a little closer. It was not enough to touch him, but there was a notable difference in space between you now.
“Michigan.” He smiled, showing appreciation for your efforts to be closer. “And you?”
“Atlanta.” You responded, flagging the bartender over for another drink. “You’re a long way from home.” You noted, watching as the worker took your used glass and turned to mix you another. “What made you decide to live here?”
“Work.” He replied, sipping away at his own beverage. Now that you were closer, the smell of his cologne seemed to be suffocating you, but it was with great pleasure to succumb to such an end.
“Must be a good job if you were willing to move so far.” He gave a small smile, nodding his head after a moment.
“You can say that.” The look in his eyes made you believe it was no ordinary office job, nor a regular paycheck that motivated him.
“Was it a job, or was it a dream?” You pressed further, studying his expression.
“Both, I suppose.” He replied, curious about how easily you picked up on it. “I’m in a band.” You could not deny your interest in the topic, nor your personal infatuation with musicians in general. You should have guessed, but somehow it was so much sweeter coming from his mouth. Everything seemed to be sweeter when he was the one saying it. “What are you here for?”
“To start over.” You shrugged. “New place, new people… new everything.”
“What were you trying to get away from?” The question struck a sore spot, but you tried not to let it show. You liked to view your move as something brave, rather than a cowardly act. When he worded it as such, it made it seem like you were running out of fear rather than confidence.
“I wouldn’t say I was running from anything. More or less just looking for something more.” You explained.
“Have you found it yet?” The question was a loaded one, and you weren’t sure if you had the answer he was looking for. The conversation seemed to run deeper than anything you were intending, yet you didn’t seem to mind. Usually when at the bar, especially with a man, the conversation revolved around sexual desires and painful flirting. This one was different, and it seemed like he wanted to see into your soul before ever taking your clothes off. You hated to admit it, but you didn’t mind it.
You hadn’t found what you were looking for when you moved to the city, but you had definitely convinced yourself otherwise. When you made the big move, you were young and naive. You had been desperately in love with the idea of love despite never knowing what it actually felt like. As you decorated a new apartment with memorabilia of a different lifetime, you fantasized about replacing it with love letters and pictures of a man you had yet to meet. You went to bed nightly with a melancholy hanging over the room and a longing for a life you were never destined to live. That was what you had been in search of, and instead, you had given up. You filled the void with sex and money, drinking away the bitter taste of your own failure and falling into bed with people who did not matter. It was a sad exchange, and no real replacement for the fulfillment you once craved, yet you had been doing it for so long now that it was the only thing you knew how to do.
Although it was nice for someone to pick your brain for once, and it was thrilling to finally be faced with stimulating conversation, you were a creature of habit. It was too risky to give too much of yourself away, even if you liked all you had seen from Jake. You weren’t sure what he was looking for, but you were too selfish to let him go. You needed the notch in your belt, even if you were sacrificing his heart in the process. You needed to regain control of the conversation, to hold the power in your hands once more, and you knew you wouldn’t have to work very hard for it. As you conjured the best response to his question, you almost felt a shred of guilt about using him for your own personal gain. You decided that out of all of them, his heart would be the hardest to break.
“Not yet, but I’m sure I will, someday.” You whispered, knowing that what you had been searching for was long out of reach for you. You had sinned so much that a simple lifestyle of love would never be in the cards for you. You had made your bed, and it was time to lie in it.
“Maybe I can help with that.” He said, his voice dropping ever so slightly. He was curious about you, and how after only minutes of knowing you, he could not imagine a world in which you did not exist. You drew him in so easily that he could not question whether it was a good idea or not. He found you inexplicably easy to need.
“Maybe so, rockstar.” You smiled up at him, knowing he could not. He could help with plenty of other things, but never that.
“Am I keeping you from anyone?” He asked, looking around the crowded bar for a moment, realizing he may have been taking you away from friends. You let out a chuckle, shaking your head.
“No, am I?”
“Definitely not.” He promised. “I’m here with my brothers. I see them enough—they can wait.”
“Don’t be like that, now.” You laughed. “You can find me later, when they’re drunk enough that they don’t notice you’re missing.” Even if you tried to make yourself seem heartless, it didn’t feel right cutting in on his family time. Humanity was something you didn’t often feel, but he seemed to pull on strings of your heart you no longer believed to exist. “I promise I’ll stick around.”
“No way,” he laughed, brushing you off. “I’d much rather get to know you, sweetheart. Plus, it saves me a headache from bickering with them all night.”
“Alright, if you’re sure.” Hesitation was still present in your voice, but if he was certain about it, you couldn’t find anything to complain about. Part of your hesitation stemmed from the fact that you did not want your night to be cut short by any distractions. The bar bathroom did not seem fitting for all you wanted to do with him, and if it took letting him go for a while to have him until the sun came up in the sky, you were okay with it.
“If you’re that worried, why don’t you come over and drink with us?” He offered, mistaking your reluctance as something selfless. Then again, he could not be upset if he were to discover your true intent, for his own was just as selfish. He feared that if he left you on your lonesome, someone else would catch your eye and he would lose his chance. Besides, inviting you to drink with the group wasn’t the worst idea he’d ever had. In fact, he thought it might be quite enjoyable.
“Taking me to meet the family already?” You teased. “I must be special.” His lips upturned slightly, drawing your attention to the mustache that decorated his upper lip. It made his already beautiful face all the more remarkable.
“You certainly are, angel.” He affirmed your statement, seemingly gravitating towards you the longer he held your gaze. “You did catch my attention, after all.” Before you knew it, his face was inches away from your own. He looked down at you over his nose, his eyelashes casting a slight shadow over his reddened cheeks, burning from the alcohol he was drinking. The smell of his cologne mixed with the whiskey on his breath was turning you into a mess, insanity calling your name the longer you stayed in the position.
“Takes a lot to do that, eh?” You asked, you voice barely heard over the sound of your hearts beating in time.
“Some would say so.” He smiled, warmer and less flirtatious than the ones before. He knew he had you how he wanted you, and he felt as though he could let go of the act for a moment. The tip of his nose was brushing against your own, making the temptation almost too much to resist. You wondered if he would strike first, or if you would have to take the risk yourself. He was a flirt, and seemingly just as big of one as you were, but you weren’t sure how deep his confidence truly lied. He’d known you for all but a half a drink, yet your claws seemed to strike deep. He was trapped, and he could run, but would always look back over his shoulder to ensure you were following.
“Have I caught your attention enough for you to kiss me?” You asked, your tone quiet but your words impactful. His hand reached out for your hip, his fingers settling gently over the silky material of your dress. The touch felt good, but it was not nearly enough. Above all, it perpetuated a vicious cycle, for you knew that a touch so addictive would not be something you could walk away from.
Perhaps Jake Kiszka was not the one trapped, and for once, you had backed yourself into a corner at the hands of his irresistible sin.
You knew better than to seek someone with the same deadly power, but you could not manage to keep yourself away. He’d kept it so well hidden that you failed to realize his power until the very minute his skin met your own.
He leaned forward, the gap closing between you as his lips landed on your own. The violence was disguised with sweetness, and wrapped up in a bow of desire. The faint taste of the whiskey he was drinking was dancing on your tongue, drawing you in alongside the warmth of his body. You raised your hand to his cheek, cupping it in your palm as his hand guided you into him. You had never experienced a feeling so overwhelming, and the sensation of his tongue gliding over your lower lip, begging to push any boundaries, was so powerful it nearly shattered your psyche. In an instant, you forgot about your plan to take him home and instead were plagued with an imminent need for him. You worried that you might not be able to make it to the bathroom with his hand so powerfully holding you in place. In that moment, you needed Jake more than you had ever needed anything in your entire life.
As he pulled away, you fought the urge to pull him right back in. He did not move too far away, almost as if he was waiting for you to do exactly that. “Is that the answer you were looking for?” It was the exact answer you were hoping for, and the two of you felt no need to go any further with formalities. You knew what you wanted, and waiting seemed pointless. Before the night was through, he would have you, and whether then be in a bed or the bathroom, he was not sure.
“A simple yes or no would have done the same.” You teased, running your thumb tentatively over the soft skin of his cheek. He seemed to lean into the touch, making your hesitation disappear.
“Right,” he chuckled, still a bit dazed from the intensity of the moment. “I’ll keep that in mind for next time.”
“No,” you shook your head. “No need for that.” He couldn’t help but laugh at your response, leaning in and placing a shorter, sweeter kiss on your lips.
“Something to get you through meeting my brothers,” he explained, as if he needed an excuse to kiss you at all.
“Is that so?” You grinned. “They’re that bad?”
“No, not bad, just a lot.” He corrected, his hand still lingering on your hip. “Was hoping that if I kissed you, it would give you a reason to stick around.”
“I’m sure it’ll be quite alright. No need to stress yourself out, honey.”
“Whatever you say, sweetheart.” He sighed, wishing that he never brought up the idea at all. He would much rather stay at the bar, alone with you to do anything you wanted. With that, he pulled back from you and grabbed his drink from the counter. You did the same, watching him as he stepped away. Suddenly, a flood of fear ran through you and reached out, grabbing his arm before he could go any further. He gave you a confused expression, wondering what was wrong as you stepped towards him. You raised your hand to his face, letting your thumb swipe away some smudged lipstick decorating his lower lip.
“Don’t think pink is your color.” You giggled, releasing your hold on him.
“You sure?” He questioned. “I’m think I can pull it off.”
“Uh-huh,” you nodded, grabbing your drink from the counter. “Whatever you say, rockstar.” You said, waiting for him to lead the way.
“What, you really don’t think so?” He asked, extending his arm out to you. You joined him at his side, watching as he surveyed the room in an attempt to locate the booth his brothers were sat in. After a moment, he seemed to brighten up as his eyes landed on a booth with three people sat inside.
“Who knows, you could surprise me.” You replied, finding yourself looking in the same direction his eyes were pointing. As you did, it felt like you’d received a harsh blow to the stomach, nearly doubling over in shock as your gaze fixated on the booth. You knew it to be the right one because the curly headed boy from earlier was sitting at the edge of one bench, laughing at something the boy beside him had said. Across from him, though, was a side profile that was so stunning it nearly stole the air from your lungs. In an attempt to make sense of it, you looked over at Jake, recognizing the similarities instantly.
You were stuck wondering if it was a joke, or a perfectly wrapped present placed at your feet by the universe itself. The evil that normally ran through your veins seemed to increase tenfold as you understood that the door had opened for you to have access to not just a gorgeous, outlandishly charming man, but a set of (outstandingly beautiful) twins.
As Jake looked back at you, you covered your expression of joy in an instant, understanding that if you were going to pull it off, you needed to be as thorough and precise about your actions as possible. You did not want to pull one just to fumble the other, nor did you want to lose both of them in the process. Before you spoke, you chose your words incredibly carefully.
“I’m nervous,” you forced a small smile, trying your best to appear anxious as you spoke.
“What are you nervous about, angel?” He asked, stepping closer to you and seemingly falling straight into the trap.
“What if they don’t like me?” You offered, glancing over to the booth and back to him.
“Not possible, sweetheart. They’re quite easy to get along with. I’m sure they’ll love you.” He said, landing a gentle hand on your arm to reassure you.
“I want to go home with you tonight, Jake, but could we… keep it between ourselves? Just for now, at least.” You knew the words were incriminating, but you always had a plan in mind. If he responded the way you predicted, it would be easy enough from there.
“What, like it’s a bad thing?” He raised an eyebrow, trying to comprehend what your intent was.
“No, honey.” You shook your head, giving a small laugh. “Not that I usually kiss and tell anyway, but I’d rather them see me as a person, not just the girl their brother is trying to fuck. It changes the way you see people, sometimes.” You explained, looking carefully over his expression as you spoke. You tried to keep your words sweet, hoping it might sway him to see it your way, even if your way was not how you were presenting it. “Does that make sense?”
“It does, angel.” He nodded, giving you a smile. “We can do that, if it makes you feel more comfortable.”
“It does,” you let out a sigh, fake but clearly convincing. “Thank you.”
“You’ve got nothing to thank me for, sweetheart.” He said, moving his hand to the curve of you back as he guided you through the crowd. “At least not yet, anyway.” He said the second part much quieter, as if he was already ahead of the game of secrecy. You wondered if maybe he enjoyed it, or the idea of having you in private got him off even further. There was much left undiscovered about Jake, and you were excited to see more. More than anything, you were happy that the first phase of your plan had come to fruition so easily.
You allowed him to lead you towards the group of unnamed boys, only a small nervous stutter in your heart. This was something you feared might be beyond your capabilities, yet you could not ignore the urge to try. When a player is faced with a challenge, backing down is not an option, and when it came to the game, nobody was more committed than you were. The minute your eyes landed on the previously unmentioned twin brother, your heart was set upon the desire for both, and you had grown so selfish over the years that you had yet to feel a shred of remorse about it. You knew that caution was needed, and every moment needed to be carefully calculated. It was a daunting task that would make a weaker woman shy away, but you were confident in your own abilities. Try as you might, you could not turn down such an opportunity.
Jake loosened his grip on you as you drew near the end of your seclusion. As he approached the chatter-filled group, they turned to look at him. Their eyes didn’t take long to land on you, but once they did, they didn’t seem to want to leave. You were hyper aware of the skimpy dress hanging over your body, tasteful enough not to potray you as a slut, yet bold enough to catch ample amounts of attention. It did not come as a surprise when all of their gazes were not pointed at your face, but rather the peek of cleavage from the black material covering your chest, and soon after, the smooth and enticing skin of your legs.
“Found some extra company, Jacob?” If it was even possible, the curly headed boy who looked so similar to Jake was even more beautiful up close.
Much like his brother, the beauty seemed to sneak up on you, drawing you in from far away and stealing your life away without a second thought the minute you were within reach.
“Hope you don’t mind if I crash the party.” You gave him a sweet smile, hiding the hunger in your eyes so you did not scare him away.
“Not at all,” he said, sliding further into the booth to make room for the two of you. You sat first, allowing Jake to take the spot at the end of the table.
“She was here all by herself, figured she could use some friends.” Jake smirked, casting a sideways glance at you.
“Friends are plentiful, here.” The boy with long curly hair said, giving you a smile. “I’m Danny.”
“And I’m Sam, Jake’s brother.” The boy beside him cut in in as if he was afraid he’d be forgotten.
“Nice to meet you guys. I’m y/n.” You extended the sentiment, looking both of them over.
“And I’m Josh, also Jake’s brother.” The boy beside you spoke now, catching your attention and forcing you to look in his direction once again. His brown eyes were warmer than Jake’s, perhaps a tad bit friendlier. His hair was shaved down on the sides, and his cheeks were tinged with a blush from the alcohol he was drinking.
“A twin, perhaps?” You asked, hoping you were guessing correctly.
“How’d you know?” He raised an eyebrow, but did not seem surprised at the statement. He was intrigued by you, and his face did not hide the fact very well. The attraction was mutual, and you could read him like a book, much different than his brother. You held a cloud of desire around your head, and no man was privy to the reason why. It affected them all the same, and it was the reason why you were stuck in the situation you were in, now. Upon first glance, his twin brother felt all of the same things.
“Lucky guess.” You chuckled, taking in all of him that was up for offer. His clothes were a bit basic, yet seemed to suit him well. The long sleeved white sweater he was wearing appeared soft, and the cologne that radiated from him was mouth-watering. It was light, fresh smelling, like sage and cedar wood. Underneath that you could smell notes of long burnt out incense sticks that seemed to cling to the fibers of his clothing. He had on beige khakis, and even if his style was not exactly eye-catching, he pulled it off well. It was clean, concise, and did not draw attention away from his face that was seemingly crafted by gods.
“Takes one to know one?” He guessed, curious about your precise analysis of the two. You chuckled, shaking your head.
“No, just a good observer is all.” You replied. “Only child, actually.”
“Ah,” he hummed, his heavy-lidded eyes gazing curiously over your face. He was intrigued just as well as you were, which seemed to make your job so much easier. “Explains a lot, then. Nobody to keep you company, so you had to occupy yourself with watching everyone else.”
“I suppose you could put it that way.” You laughed, already beginning to notice the clear difference between the two. Josh was much more outgoing than his counterpart, with a goofy smile and booming voice. He seemed to say whatever was on his mind, whenever he wanted to. You weren’t sure if the liquor had any impact on that fact, or if he was like that all of the time. You were curious to know, and you knew that in due time, you would have all of the answers you wanted. “I think people are interesting.”
“That they are.” He agreed, sipping from a beer bottle in hand. “Am I interesting?” He was definitely drunk, but you did not mind; if anything, it seemed to rid you of the uncomfortable getting to know him phase.
“Incredibly.” You laughed, the sound filling the immediate air around you all and catching all of the attention. You were not afraid to admit to your own beauty, and how easy it was for you to catch attention. When you had a smile on your lips and a laugh stuck between your teeth, the genuine warmth pulled people in even further.
“I don’t know if I like how fast you answered that.” He said, furrowing his eyebrows with another grin lighting up his whole face.
“If it’s the truth, I don’t think it really matters if you like it or not.” You explained, keeping your tone light to match his. You tuned out of your conversation for a moment, just for long enough to gauge how Jake was taking to the two of you talking. Within seconds, you realized he was not even listening; he was stuck in a lighthearted argument with his brother across the table about something that seemed (to you, at least) incredibly unimportant. Once you were certain you were in the clear, you focused your attention on Josh again. Even after only a few seconds of looking elsewhere, his beauty seemed to smack you in the face with a newfound intensity, as if it was angry with you for not paying attention.
“Why are you here all alone, anyway?” Josh questioned, fidgeting with the corner of a napkin sat in front of him on the table.
“I figured spending a night at the bar would be better than sitting at home all alone.” You shrugged, knowing that you were only giving him half truths. Sitting there and flirting with him was the reason you came out alone, even if you did not know he would be the main subject of your focus beforehand. Well, one of them at least.
“And you were just lucky enough to run into a group as fun as us.” He added, making sure to motion towards the whole table as he spoke. He seemed as if he was big on talking with his hands, and it was a trait you thought was quite cute.
“Luck is a good word for it.” You agreed, deciding now that he’d invited you in, you could begin to seek out the weak spots of his strong personality. For a moment, you did not speak again. You took the time to study him in his entirety, but played it off as if you were invested in the bullshit argument still going down beside you.
His eyes were shining with amusement at his brother's butting heads, and his smile never faltered. You wondered if he was genuinely just happy all of the time, or if the breathtaking smile was a constant mask he’d learned how to perfect. He drummed his fingers against the tabletop with one hand as his other fidgeted with something else. It bounced between the aforementioned napkin and the waning edge of the beer bottle label. His foot tapped against the ground as well, every so often switching to a full on leg bounce. You had yet to confirm if it was anxiety making him jitter so badly, or if it was a surplus of energy. Either way, it seemed like he could get up at that very moment and run laps around the building.
There were silver earrings placed in different spots on his ear, yet the chains that dangled around his neck were gold. It was a contradiction to the way Jake wore his, with gold in his lobe and silver decoration on his chest. You thought it was interesting enough, but nothing worthwhile enough for you to remember. He hummed along to the songs the band was playing every now and again, showing his appreciation of music through minute actions. You wondered if Josh was also in the band that Jake had previously told you about. The song switched, and there was a twitch in Josh’s eye as his lips upturned ever so slightly. He liked the song, and you could capitalize off it. This specific bar had a liking for old music, and luckily for you, your father refused to listen to any song that came out after ‘95. It was your forte, and seemingly his too. You wished you could thank the (mostly) cover band for picking such a great song to play.
“Fairport Convention.” You sighed, smiling as you stirred your ice around your drink. As you said it, Josh seemed to perk up. His head turned towards you, his eyes shining with admiration for your music knowledge. Once you knew his attention was yours, you spoke again. “I love this song.”
“You… uh, yeah. Me too.” He grinned. If he thought you were attractive before that second, it seemed to grow even stronger. His whole body shifted as he turned in your direction, and his tongue darted out and over his bottom lip. “This is definitely one of my favorite bands of all time.”
“That’s a bold statement.” You said, looking over at him as you sipped your drink.
“And I mean it.” He assured you. “I didn’t know I was in the company of someone with such fantastic taste.” Like venom, your next words came smoothly and deadly.
“There’s lots you don’t know, but I’m sure you could find out if you’re ever interested.” Your voice dropped as you spoke, as if the words shared between you were sacred. In a sense, they were; there was no chance in hell you would ever say it loud enough for Jake to hear. Your eyes flickered to meet his, holding his gaze with a soft intensity that made him squirm in his seat. His breath caught in his throat for a moment, trying to piece together your true intentions. His demeanor shifted in an instant, and in a way you very much needed to see more of.
“Is that so?” He pried further, treading lightly and keeping his voice as hushed as your own. As he said it, you felt Jake’s hand snake to your thigh underneath the table, so stealthily that you would not have even noticed the movement if not for his burning touch lingering just below the hem of your dress. “I’m not sure if I understand what you mean, mama.” The pet name rolled off his tongue, coated in a slight husk that raised goosebumps across your skin. You wondered if you should feel dirty for flirting with Josh while Jake’s hand lingered so tentatively on your leg, but you seemed to miss the boat when it came to remorse in its entirety.
“I think you understand exactly what I mean, honey.” You chuckled, giving a soft smile. His eyes darkened at your words, as if the statement had opened up a whole new world for him. You had given him permission to think such things about you, and he was grateful for it, almost like he’d been fighting the urge to see you as such since he first laid eyes on you.
“Mhm,” he hummed to himself, his head cocking to the side slightly as he tried to figure you out. “How could I say no to an offer like that?”
“I was hoping you wouldn’t.” You admitted, holding his gaze to cement your position on the matter. With that, Jake was calling your name and bringing you into conversation with the rest of them. You looked over Josh for a moment longer, then turned to look at his brother. You would have been fearful of Jake seeing Josh’s dumbfounded face if not for the fact he was fully immersed in you. As soon as he caught sight of your face again, he seemed just as enthralled in you as he was when you were talking by the bar.
Time passed and drinks were had, laughs were plentiful and the flirting was unbearable, although kept expertly under wraps. Bouncing between the two seemed like a daunting task you feared you would not be able to do, yet the longer you did it, the easier it became. As the time passed, you even seemed to enjoy it. Danny and Sam seemed incredibly drunk, and due to their innate inability to be observant, your work had become quite simple. Jake had gone to the bar and grabbed everyone another round of drinks, and you had noticed that he switched to drinking beer as the night dwindled on. Your best guess was that he did not want to be too drunk to entertain you, and you had to appreciate his effort.
“Do you have any plans after this, mama?” Josh asked, leaning in almost too close for comfort. Although, it would be very comfortable if not for the crowd onlooking the two of you.
“Looking to learn more already?” You teased, casting a look at him through the corner of your eye.
“Is it such a crime?” He challenged, wishing you would turn to face him once more.
“Not a crime, but not a good night for me. I have to work in the morning.” The lie slipped off your tongue as smooth as silk, no hesitation present in your answer. If only he knew the truth, he may not be so willing to give in to you. “Raincheck?” You asked, turning your head towards him a little more.
“You name the time and place, and I’ll be there.” He promised. Your forearms were resting against each other on the table, incriminating the two of you even further. Josh seemed to be leaning in to you, and if you were a little more drunk, you would have reciprocated the action. Before he could get too close, though, you felt Jake’s fingers tighten against your thigh, but it was not in the soft teasing manner as it was before. It pulled you out of the bubble that surrounded you and Josh, causing a flood of fear to run through you as you looked over at him.
The look in his eye was sinister, yet not threatening. You weren’t sure how he pulled it off, but you had no better way to describe it. His grip on you remained the same, and for a moment, he did not speak. His jaw was hard set, the muscles in his cheeks tense as he looked over your face. “I’m going to grab another drink. Care to join?” He asked, his voice soft and nothing like the flame in his eye. Although his tone was misleading, and you knew that his question was not as it appeared; he had no intent on going back to the bar without you.
“Sure,” you nodded, giving him a smile. You wanted to maintain your composure as much as you could, because if you faltered even slightly, he would see you exactly as you were. He stood, not making any further moves as you joined him. Discreetly, you gave Josh’s knee a squeeze to reassure him after leaving him hanging before you stood yourself.
Jake began walking without looking back to see if you were following; he did not need to, for he felt the cloud of euphoria surrounding him that was only sourced from your company. When he reached the bar, he leaned against a vacant area with room enough for two. He faced inwards, looking at all of the whiskey bottles on the wall and wondering if he would need something stronger to cope with your venomous personality. You took the spot beside him, wondering if he would speak, or if you would have to come up with something on your own. It was so much easier when he did the talking for you.
His lip was curled slightly, as if he had a sour taste on his tongue. You noticed his shoulders heaving with every breath, but he did not appear outwardly furious. Maybe he was holding it all under the surface and waiting for the right moment to explode. For a second, you believed that you had ruined your chances with the beautiful man before you. You wondered what he was thinking, or how much he heard or saw of you and Josh. His silence was painstaking, and you could not deny the nervous flutter in your stomach or the clammy palms.
Then, he turned to look at you, his eyes catching yours in a tell-all reunion. If he was angry, it had dissipated in a second and it was now replaced with the same carnal desire that plagued him before you ever joined his brothers at the booth. You had your pretty face to thank, and the budding feelings that were already blossoming in his heart. He felt for you more than a one night stand should, and even if he knew you were evil to the core, he couldn’t stop himself from feeling such a way. The cycle continued, and he had already branded himself a fool for you.
“What game are you trying to play, sweetheart?” He asked, looking down at you with a raised eyebrow.
“Depends… what’s your favorite?” You smirked up at him, giving a bat of your eyelashes to cement the flirtation in your tone. He gave a low chuckle, neglecting a response, instead raising his beer bottle to his lips and tilting his head back. As he drank down the liquid, your eyes drifted towards the exposed columns of his neck, his Adam's apple bobbing with each long gulp.
You couldn’t help but think how foolish he was to expose his very lifeline to you, and although you were not a being of mythical nature and blood was not exactly your thing, you were certain that your lips, or better, your tongue settled gently atop the skin of his jugular would send him straight to his knees. You were tempted to test it out, just to see if your assumptions were correct. You could lean forward and try, but you knew it was best to wait; he would run himself in circles for a few moments before he inevitably landed himself in that exact position.
As he pulled the bottle away from his mouth, the glisten of alcohol making the plush skin of his lips glisten under the dim bar light, his eyes drifted back down towards your face before his head dropped into its earlier position. He was silent for a moment, as if he was trying to understand you better, and then he spoke softly, leaning down so you could hear him over the boom of the stereo system.
“I don’t like games at all, angel.” The sultry tone sent a shiver down your spine, but you did not let it phase you any further than that. Before he could pull away, you turned your head inwards, just enough so that your nose would brush against his. At the sudden touch, he did not shy away like you expected. If anything, he seemed to lean further into you without any hesitation. At that moment, you understood that you were not playing with an amateur; any lesser man would shy away from your strong nature. If you had to admit, him being open to the advance made your desire to play him grow even stronger. “I saw you talking to Josh. Do you think you’re being sly? Playing hard to get?” He asked, the sheer power behind his soft tone making your knees weak and your stomach twist in a knot. “Or are you trying to make me jealous?” If only he knew how extensive your evil truly was, he would never have spoken at all and instead turn away to run. His accusations were nowhere near the atrocities you were intending to commit. “What, you have nothing to say, now? Finally have you cornered?”
“Just don’t think you’d like what I have to say, is all.” You said, placing your empty cup down on the bar top without breaking the position. His eyes were boring into your own, as if he was trying to make you submit to him. In truth, you found his confidence comedic. Of course, you’d give him what he wanted, but he’d be doing you more of a favor than you were doing him. It wouldn’t take him very long to put down the dominant facade and comprehend that he was not the one with the power. “Some things are better left unsaid, Jacob.”
A flame was dancing dangerously behind his pupil, letting you know that there was much more to his character if you looked behind the mask he constantly had on. It intrigued you, making you wonder what would happen if you continued to nurse it with gasoline. Perhaps the explosion would be quite enjoyable, even for days after the disaster. Russian roulette was a game that often seemed tempting, and playing it with Jake made it all the more enticing.
The lights were low, making it incredibly difficult to place the emotion in his eye. Even then, it didn’t matter; all men were the same, and he was already caught on your hook. He was irritated, annoyed at your evasion and what seemed to be a tiresome game of cat and mouse, but it was not enough for him to lack interest in you. The scent of whiskey on your breath, casted warmly over his lips was drawing him in further, making him wonder if he could still taste it on your tongue if he acted fast enough. He thought he had the upper hand, that he was the one who was charming you, but he could not seem to see that he was playing the exact way you wanted him to. He was blissfully unaware, and you were ready for the kill. “If it means that much to you, Jacob, I’m sure the bathroom is free. Maybe a quick stop might convince you of where my loyalty lies.” The corners of your lips twitched upwards into a small, wicked smile. “Josh was never offered an invitation like that, was he?”
You reached out, running a delicate hand over his bicep that was covered with the thin material of his button-up. He flexed in response of the feeling, the touch running through him and clouding his judgement. You leaned forward, captivating him further. It was your time to strike, and you were moving with full force. He was too weak to resist, even if he knew he should. You did not need to deny the flirting accusations, because he had seen it with his own eyes. Doing so would drive him further way, but you could capitalize off the fact that he did not know the true motives of your conversation with Josh. For now, you could let him believe it was to make him jealous, because it worked in your favour.
In that moment, he realized the full extent of your wicked nature. He wanted to walk away, to leave you to wallow in the loss after he caught you flirting with his brother, but something about the burn of your touch and the calming effect of your gaze made the desire flee him. He knew you had no intentions of anything further than sex, and now that your mask had melted away, he could even understand that you didn’t even have care for him as a person. Getting off was the only thing that mattered, and that much was clear, but not even that seemed to turn him away. With every touch and lingering stare, every ounce of kindness (even if it was rare) and each one of your sweet smiles gave him a breath of hope that maybe he had misjudged the situation and you were actually telling the truth.
The vicious cycle had already begun, and he was a fool for thinking he could escape. He couldn’t resist your temptation, and he could not refute his desire to have you, too. As long as you continued to feed him, he would come crawling back, even if it would kill him. He could not assume the worst of you, especially because he’d only known you for a short time, so he relaxed under your touch and gave in to the feeling. He wanted to change your mind, to be the one to keep you for longer than a day, and he was willing to do whatever he could to persuade you to give him the chance.
Little did you know, by offering him the invitation, you were walking straight into your own demise. Although he did not know it yet, he would not be the one to steal your heart, but he would be the one to put an end to your venomous ways.
“How kind of you.” He shot back, but the refrain from earlier seemed to disappear. “Your generosity is staggering, sweetheart.”
“Is that you saying no?” You took it upon yourself to move closer to him, nearly pressing yourself into his body in hopes that it would sway his thoughts. He turned his head down towards you, casting a far away glance from over his nose, as if he was already thinking of all the things the two of you could get up to behind a locked door.
“Don’t put words in my mouth.” His voice was quiet, but his tone was strong. His hand reached for your hip, the pull of your aura too strong. He couldn’t help himself.
“Why don’t you go wait in the bathroom, and I’ll go and collect my things. I’ll tell them I’m headed home so they won’t even suspect a thing.” You said, giving a soft smile as his eyes watched your face. “Then, I can show you just how generous I really am.”
“How do I know you’re not playing another one of your little games?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. You rolled your eyes, heaving a little sigh as you did so. You could not lie and say that abandoning him just to mess with him had not crossed your mind, but you needed him far too much to walk away without anything. So, instead of making a fuss, you reached up and let your fingers settle over the clasp back of your diamond earring. You slipped it off and extended your hand towards him. He looked to the shiny rock, then back at your face, unsure of what you were doing.
“Take it, so you know I’ll come back.” You motioned your hand further towards him, insisting on the fact. Slowly, he reached out and grabbed it from you. He slipped it in his pocket, nodding in appreciation for your lack of fight.
“Don’t be too long, sweetheart. I don’t like being kept waiting.” He spoke, looking down at you once more before taking a step back. His cockiness was infuriating, yet looked good on him. Instead of arguing, you winked at him before he turned to walk away. Once he was swallowed by the crowd, you turned to the bar and grabbed a napkin from the stack sitting nearby. Quickly, you called the bartender over to ask him if you could borrow a pen. Luckily, he was quick to retrieve you one, and you scribbled a message down on the paper.
You walked back towards the booth you were sitting in moments before, making sure Jake was nowhere in sight. When you reached the group again, Sam and Danny were chattering amongst themselves while Josh seemed to be awaiting your arrival. You shot him a smile, sliding in beside him for just a second to tie up any loose ends and to let Josh know that the invitation was still very much alive. “Hey,” you breathed, talking only loud enough for him to hear.
“Was wondering where you were.” He replied, his stare intense as he silently begged you to move closer.
“I know, I’m sorry.” You said, giving a sympathetic smile. “Jake wasn’t feeling well so he went to the bathroom. Probably because he was mixing beer and whiskey.” You paused, rolling your eyes for dramatic effect. “He wanted me to tell you guys not to wait up for him. I wish I could stay longer, but I have to work in the morning.” You put all of your heart into the fake tale to make it believable, and Josh was just drunk enough to take your word for it.
“You’re leaving already?” There was a hint of disappointment in his eye, but when you reached out under the table and landed a gentle hand on his thigh, he seemed to perk up.
“I wish I could stay,” you said, finding his hand so you could slip the napkin into his palm. He grabbed it from you, keeping it as discreet as he could. “Thank you for being so sweet and letting me drink with you guys, though.”
“Anytime, mama.” He said, noticing your fingers still lingering on him. There was a twitch in his jaw as his teeth clenched together. If he could have it his way, he’d have you right then and there.
“I’ll see you again sometime?” You asked, a fake look of hope in your eye.
“Definitely.” He nodded. “You have a way home? Do you want me to walk with you?” He offered, partially concerned with your safety, but more concerned with getting you alone.
“I live just around the corner, so no need for that.” You assured him, imploring him to remember the note clutched tightly in his hand. “I’ll see you later, Josh.” You gave him a lingering stare as you grabbed your purse and backed out of the booth. He nodded in response, watching your hips as you walked off into the crowd. When you were out of eyesight, he looked down at the napkin, scrawled with your number and a message for him.
Call me so we can arrange that raincheck. Keep it between us, though—a secret is all the more fun ;)
You walked towards the bathroom with a fervor, pushing through the crowd with little regard for anyone or anything. It had been an extremely long night of flirting with little reward thus far. Knowing that Jake was waiting for you, feeling the same way that you were, was enough to make you want to tear the building down in order to get to him. When you rounded the corner to the one single bathroom that the building had (which in your opinion was a poor judgment on the owners part), you noticed nobody pooling around the door to wait their turn. It came as a surprise, especially considering how crowded the establishment was, but you certainly could not find a complaint about it.
Before you went inside, you reached into your purse. First, you popped a mint in your mouth, settling it under your tongue as you reapplied your deodorant and lipgloss. You ran your hand through your hair and took a deep breath, settling your thoughts before you joined Jake. The whole night has been a whirlwind, and you were shocked that you made it this far. You reached out, your fingers clasping around the handle and turning it, only to find that it was locked. You let out a huff of irritation, raising your fist to knock on the solid wood door. You hit against it with little force, sending a pattern of thuds echoing into the other side. You thought that if you did it like so, he would recognize that it was you.
You waited for a moment, and received nothing in return. Frustrated, you knocked again, a little louder this time. When he did not answer, you tapped your foot against the ground while anxiety invaded your mind. You worried that maybe you had crossed a line, pushed him a little too far and he’d changed his mind. Worse than that, you feared he decided to give you a taste of your own medicine and lead you on only to leave you with nothing. Just as you were ready to knock again, the knob twisted and the door slowly opened, revealing Jake’s smirking face illuminated by the fluttering fluorescent bulb.
“Asshole,” you muttered, unpleasant about his actions.
“Impatient, much?” He raised an eyebrow, opening the door to let you in. You pushed past him, watching him close the door and lock it before turning to face you.
“Not impatient,” you shook your head. “Just wondering why you were keeping me waiting.”
“That is impatience, sweetheart.” He chuckled, stepping towards you. “Just like you not being able to wait until we got home.”
“So what?” You shrugged, a smile tugging at your lips. You were becoming less annoyed the closer he got, and now that he was within arms reach, you had almost forgotten about the minor inconvenience entirely. “Maybe you should take it as a compliment.” You offered, reaching out and settling your hand on his bicep. You pulled him further towards you and his hand shot to your hip as if it were a natural reaction.
“Who says I don’t?” He challenged, his lips just inches away from your own. He was teasing you without even doing a thing, imploring you to make the decision you both had been waiting so long for. “You’ve got a habit of jumping to conclusions.”
“Whatever,” you rolled your eyes, the smile still eating away at your lips. “You’ve got an awful way of showing it.” You had been with plenty of people, many in this exact situation, yet it had never come so easily as it did with him. There was something compelling about Jake, and it made you want to banter with him and challenge his every move. It wasn’t malice, but it was fun, and you knew you would have a very hard time letting go of it when the night was through. Something told you that Jake was not the type of person you should let go of.
Perhaps that feeling was meant to be felt in a romantic context, yet you were still greedy enough to keep him on your hook for your own selfish desires.
“Maybe I’ll have to show it in some other way, then.” He theorized, bringing his hand to rest on your jaw. You did not have to respond in order for him to feel your enthusiasm. He leaned down, wasting no more time as he pressed his lips to yours. The seclusion of the bathroom had been a blessing in disguise; as his lips moved against your own, you could feel his guard being let down. Whether that was because of privacy, or because you finally had the opportunity to leech the life from him, you did not know.
What you did know was that because the two of you were alone, everything felt all the more fantastic. His hand felt like it was burning to the touch, melting into your skin and bringing the two of you together as one. The taste of alcohol on his tongue was even more delicious, because this time you knew it was laced with sin. His chest pressed against yours was intoxicating because you could feel the beating of his heart in time with yours. The smell of his cologne was not clouded by perfumes and aftershaves of people walking by, and his ragged breathing was not covered by the boom of music. In here, you had access to him in whatever way you pleased without interference from any external force. In here, you had the opportunity to take him for your own.
His lips trailed from your own, brushing over the firey skin of your cheeks and eventually, down to your neck. The graze of his teeth against your pulse-point was was driving you to insanity, and the feeling of his tongue running over your sweet spots was the nail in the coffin. For a brief moment, you feared that with him, your power was obsolete. Every touch was electric, and every second seemed antagonizingly slow. You were at his disposal now, and you wondered if he would be kind to you despite all of the bad karma headed in your direction.
As he continued to work his way down to your collarbone, you knew that that was no way he could be your bad karma, because no punishment should feel so good.
He backed you into the countertop, the backs of your thighs slamming against the cool tile and sending a shiver down your spine. Before you could recover, and without ever moving his lips from you, he planted his hands firmly on your waist and lifted you onto the counter. He was moving so quickly that you barely had time to process the submissive role he’d forced you into. His hand wandered up your body, settling on the thin material of your dress just above your breasts. The feeling of his warm hands on your cold skin made your breath catch in your throat, and when he pulled the material down, you felt a whine escape your lips.
“Needy little thing,” he muttered, his voice raspy with lust as his eyes grazed over your now bare chest. He’d become a whole new person in an instant, and shyness or reserve completely fleeing him. You wanted to know this side of him, more than you ever wanted to know the other side of him. There was something bordering animalistic in his approach, and his eyes darkened with the intensity of his need for you. “You want me, sweetheart?” He asked, lightly running his thumb over your hardened nipple.
For once, completely submitting to a man seemed like the right thing to do. You felt in your heart that if you were good to him, he would be fantastic to you.
“So bad, Jake.” You breathed, looking over his face as you spoke. You noticed a slight scowl on his lips that had not been there earlier, and a shed of malice in his eyes. Perhaps Jake was the type to become the worst version of himself when his clothes were off, and you were not shy in admitting that it only turned you on further. You wondered if maybe he was not looking for you to call him by his name; so far, he’d exuded his adoration for dominance, so perhaps he was searching for a title that fit the character. You thought that if you’d made it this far without fucking up, the least you could do was try your luck. “I need you, sir.”
His pupils engulfed his irises as he listened to your words and the corners of his lips upturned into a smirk. He was painfully hard, the newest term of endearment sending him into a craze as he bunched the bottom of your dress in his fists. You raised your ass off the counter, allowing him to push the fabric to your navel. As you sat back down, his hands caught your hips and pulled you closer to the edge of the counter. The two of you were perfectly in tune, now. He was fucked up for needing you to refer to him in such a way to get off, and you were just as fucked up for knowing exactly what to say without him telling you.
He hooked his fingers through the side of your panties, pulling them down with your help. “You need me?” He asked, his eyes settling on your cunt, finally getting a taste of what he’d been waiting for all along. “You flirt so much that you just can’t wait another second to be touched? Is that it?” He pressed further, his eyes only flickering to your face once to catch a glimpse of your expression.
“Yes, sir.” You nodded, aching at the thought of him being the one to touch you. Your desperation had grown so quick and so strong that it was nearly painful, and you had to fight the urge to reach between your legs and do the job for him. As much as you enjoyed his antics, you knew you would enjoy sex with him even more.
“So what was it?” He asked, letting his rough fingertips graze the soft skin of your thighs. The touch sent goosebumps prickling over your skin. “Or who was it might be the better question.”
“W-what?” You stuttered, only half listening to his tirade.
“Don’t play dumb, angel.” He scolded, his fiery gaze flicking upwards and holding your stare this time. Before he spoke again, he placed one hand on your knee, roughly pushing it to the side to give him access to you. “Who turned you into such a mess? Was it me, or was it my brother?” Jake knew as soon as the words left his lips, it hit a nerve within you. You had expected him to drop the subject and forget about it as soon as he got you naked, that he would feel superior for being the one to have you in such a way. Clearly, you had misjudged him, and Jake was the type to hold a grudge. That, or he didn’t really care all that much and just loved to torture you.
“You, sir.” You promised, making sure to add a breathiness to your tone that would send him spiraling. It worked, but not to the extent you had hoped. His hand drifted to the inside of your thigh, dangerously close to your core yet far enough away to make it excruciatingly hard for you to sit through.
‘Maybe he’s a sadist,’ you thought. Then, a worse idea washed over you; if he was a sadist, you would gladly be the masochist. At that moment, the tables turned. The boy before you had made you into a mess, spinning your entire world on its axis and changing your trajectory. For once, you had no concern for your own pleasure, and felt that you could only accept such kindness if it were to please him.
In short, he’d turned you soft.
Jake knew that this conversation was making you squirm, but he did not know the reason why. You did not feel guilt for flirting with Josh; you were overcome with emotion at the idea of living to be a source of pleasure for Jake. You were so keen on the idea of using others for your own personal gain, yet as he stared at you from between your legs, waiting for his next moment to strike, you knew that you would give up the whole world just to be of use to him, in any way he deemed necessary.
Sexually, of course.
Romance was never an option laid out on the table, nor would it ever be.
“You sure about that, sweetheart?” He asked, his upper lip curling as he brought his hand to your cunt. You let out a gasp, your fingers tightening around the edge of the countertop as his thumb brushed over your clit. It was featherlight, a minimal touch that should not have produced such a strong effect on you, yet everything seemed grand when Jake was the one doing it.
For a split second, you felt regret at the idea of trying to get Josh into your bed, too. You need not be so greedy when someone so fantastic was willing to fulfill all of your needs. Then, the moment passed and your wicked nature returned to you. You were excited at the prospect of having Josh in the same way, because you had little doubt that he would treat you just as good.
“Did you want him in here with you, playing with your pretty little pussy?” The vulgarity wrapped delicately around his tongue, like it was the sweetest word he’d ever spoken. You felt yourself clench around nothing, your heart beating hard enough to burst through your ribcage. “You want him to touch you, instead?”
“No, sir.” You whined, feeling the muscles in your thighs twitch as he added pressure to his thumb. You were only partially lying, because you knew that if he stopped, you would break down, crumbling to the ground and turning to dust from the loss of his precious company. You did not want Josh to touch you instead, you just wanted him to do it too. “I just want you, baby.” You pleaded, hoping he could read between the lines and see that you wanted more.
Jake knew you were lying; he knew that you were not a lustful woman who caught the attention of men at the bar; you were a foul, wicked entity that was rotten to the core. He could see it in your eyes, the lack of remorse and shame. There was no room for any other emotion in you other than desire, but he felt lucky to be on the receiving end of such things. If he was smart, he would have turned and walked out the door. He should have left you there to wallow in your own stupidity and arrogance, and maybe then you would have learned not to make such a mistake. Every time he felt like he had the willpower to do so, you caught his eye, or another whiny moan pushed past your pink, glossed lips, and he knew he would stay between your legs until he heaved his last dying breath. Leaving you was not an option, yet staying would kill him.
Either way, he knew that death was most feasible, and he would rather die hearing his name stuck in your throat than alone and clinging to the memory.
“Then let me hear how fucking bad you want it.” He ordered, his words resembling a growl as he leaned forward and let a trail of spit fall from his lips to his fingers. Not long after, he pushed his middle and index finger inside of you. Your back arched at the feeling, your hips lifting off the counter to meet the curl of his fingers inside of you. You let out a string of curses, a groan tearing through your chest as a wave of pleasure washed over you. You had no idea what he was depriving you of until you felt it, and now you feared you could not live without it.
“Oh, fuck.” You gasped, noticing the steady pace of his fingers be joined by his thumb on your clit.
“That’s it, sweetheart. Let me hear it.” He encouraged, nearly driven to madness at the knowledge he was the one making you sing such precious sounds. You leaned back, your head resting on the scratched mirror as you portrayed yourself in an even more pornographic manner. Your tits were spilling from the top of your dress and your knuckles were white from gripping the countertop so tightly. Your eyebrows were furrowed, your lips parted as he worked his way up to familiarity with your body. Although he wasn’t certain he would see you again after the night was through, he wanted to ensure that if he did, he knew you well enough to pick up where you left off tonight. Plus, he hoped that if he did a good enough job, you would invite him back for more.
His need to be needed by you was debilitating, but he couldn’t help himself. He felt like something else entirely when he was around you, like pleasing you was the only thing in the world that mattered.
You would think that by now he would know better, especially after seeing the evil you were capable of when it came to his brother, but it did not matter to him. He wanted to be with you so badly that he chose to blind himself on your behalf. He’d tricked himself to believe you were genuine, and he had enough faith in his own ability that he believed he could make you forget about your attraction to Josh. When the night was through, he was confident that his brother would not even be a passing thought in your mind.
His own naïveté would inevitably be the end of him, but he was too stubborn to admit the truth.
He was a force to be reckoned with, but you were an otherworldly force that not only him, but the world itself had never encountered, and likely never would again.
“Feels so fucking good, sir.” You gasped, squeezing your eyes shut as another forceful pull of pleasure twisted your stomach. His eyes were settled on your cunt, watching his fingers drive you to the brink of insanity. The sight was doing just the same to him—with every pump of his fingers, his cock throbbed in anticipation for what he would experience in due time.
“See, sweetheart? You do know how to do something worthwhile with your mouth after all.” He muttered, talking down to you all while blessing you with the most generous gift. He was still seething that Josh had a taste of the sweetness you had to offer, even if he was the lucky one to have you so intimately. Instead of depriving you both of the pleasure, he figured he could get the best of both worlds. He might have felt remorse if not for you enjoying his harsh words so much.
Another moan escaped you. It was louder than you anticipated, engulfing the silence that once existed in the air. The sound was so vulgar that it clung to the poorly decorated walls, seeping into the foundation and making home. You would never be able to walk into the place again without being reminded of the memory indefinitely. Jake's company far outweighed the value of any other, and his legacy would live on in the building forever. Even as sharp insults slid off his tongue and in your direction, you felt like it was a blessing to be the one to receive it.
Your muscles tensed as his fingers curled, brushing against the sweet spot he’d so easily found. He seemed to know you so well despite barely knowing you at all, and it was comforting just as much as it was confusing. You wanted to give in to him, to let your iron guard down for a moment to let him and see you as you truly were rather than what you tried to be, but you couldn’t. You could not trust a man that seemed so eager to please you, and one who did it so well. For a moment, you believed that he was the master of deception, and you had taken him for a fool when in reality, it was only you who could be branded as such. You wondered if you had been so sure of yourself that you believed he was falling for your lies, when in fact, you were playing into his game.
Whoevers game it was did not matter in the end, as no matter which way it went, the two of you were being played by each other in entirely different ways. He was trying to con the player into taking a chance on him, and you were trying to con the lover into submission so you could fuck his brother. It was a losing battle for the both of you, but try was the only thing you knew how to do.
“Are you going to cum for me, Angel?” He asked, his voice barely sounding over your desperation.
“Y-yes sir,” you gasped, the intensity of the pleasure making you want to force your legs shut just to get a moment of rest. You were certain that you were being louder than the music playing outside the door, but neither of you cared.
“You going to let everyone know how good I’m making you feel?” He asked, his eyes flickering towards the door for a moment, then back to you.
“God, yes.” You muttered, feeling a bead of sweat trickle down your forehead. The bathroom was unbearably warm as is, and with the added warmth of what he was doing to you, it was nearly suffocating. Your whole body felt like it was on fire. Your heartbeat was deafening as it rang through your eardrums and the pit of your stomach felt like it was encased in flames. You were so close, and you needed it so bad. You were so strung out on pleasure that you could not formulate any further words. Instead, you did exactly as he said, muttering curses mixed with pornographic sounds that would ensure anyone lingering by the door would quickly make an exit.
Then, your vision began to blur as the orgasm threatened you further. The euphoria was coursing through your veins, throbbing under your skin and begging to take your life. With every movement he was pushing you closer to the edge, and he was drinking in every second of the moment. He watched as you expression twisted into pleasure, how your chest would rise and fall with every breath, how the muscles of your legs twitched every time he brought his thumb back over your clit. You were enchanting and he found it impossible not to watch.
You could feel yourself descending into something stronger than anything you’d ever felt. The whole world felt like it was spinning and your body felt light. It was within your grasp, and you were delirious enough to think that if you reached out, you could wrap your fingers around the billowing clouds of euphoria and draw them closer, to drown yourself in it. You moved your hips down on his hand, needing that little bit extra to get you there, and he had no issue giving it to you. It was overwhelming in the best possible way, and you felt the need to stave off the urge just to make it last a little bit longer. Not long after that, you realized how ridiculous the idea was and began to give in to the temptation. It felt like it was consuming you, your skin white hot with desire and no sign of letting up.
And then it was gone.
Your eyes shot open, a fire dancing in your pupils as you looked down at him. He had drawn his hand away completely, a small smirk toying across his lips as he turned his gaze towards you. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” You asked, clearly upset with no intent to hide it. The pleasure was still making your skin tingle, but it was dissipating faster with every second that passed until eventually, it turned into an empty sense of longing settled deep in the pit of your stomach. In any other circumstance, he would have chastised you for speaking so harshly, but he was enjoying your desperation and frustration too much to ask you to stop.
“I’m not that kind, sweetheart.” He reminded you, knowing that denying you an orgasm was a complex decision with many reasons as to why. He did not think you were deserving of one so soon, even if he craved to see you turn to a mess before him. More than that, he did not what you to cum from something as frivolous as his hands. “You really think you deserve it?”
No, you did not think you deserved it, but god did you want it. In your mind, want was equal to, if not more important than anything else.
“Jake, please.” You breathed, your cheeks stained red from embarrassment more than pleasure, now. Not often did you feel that you should beg for a man, yet for some reason, he made you feel as though you would die without him. There was some otherworldly power that he bestowed upon you after a single touch, and you were hooked on him for life. He was more powerful than any substance and more desirable than any other man. “I’ve been so good for you, baby. Please let me cum.” While you spoke, his mind seemed completely elsewhere.
As you begged, he paid no mind to your neediness and instead raised his index finger to his mouth, slowly slipping the digit between his lips and settling it on his tongue. He inhaled deeply as the taste of your arousal overwhelmed him, letting out a low groan that rattled his chest. Although it was muffled by his finger in his mouth, you heard it loud and clear. If it were possible, the simple action made you even more desperate for him, and you thought you might die if he made you wait any longer. When he withdrew his finger, a slight popping noise echoed through the air around the two you. When he looked up at you, his pupils had completely consumed his irises, blackened with lust for you.
“Taste so sweet, angel.” He muttered, his gaze flickering back to your cunt. “You have been good for me, haven’t you?” He smiled, but it was not the beautiful one you’d grown so accustomed to. This time, it was evil, and it shook you to the core.
“So good, sir.” You agreed, nodding your head slightly. You looked down at him with innocent eyes and a little smile, hoping that he would see reason. “Please let me cum, sir. I’ve been so good.” You said it again, with more conviction in your eyes in hopes of winning the battle. He let his fingers trail up your thigh, the light touch tickling your skin and sending another rush of arousal straight to your cunt.
“You sound so fucking pretty when beg for me.” He spoke lowly, but with plenty of power within his words. With that, his hands settled on your hips and he pulled you even closer to the edge of the counter. He drink to his knees before you, eyes focused intently on your cunt. He leaned forward, his mouth connecting with you without any further conversation, reveling the real reason why he’d gotten on his knees.
He flattened his tongue against you, slowly running it through your folds, getting another taste of the arousal that he was responsible for. He hummed against you, showing his appreciation for you and the opportunity to have you like such. You let out a shaky sigh, still leaning your head against the mirror to support yourself as he worked at you. He took it slow at first, wanting to savour every moment of the experience as he feared he may never get the chance again. You loosened your iron grip on the countertop, reaching down and tangling your fingers in the long locks of brown hair. It felt good around your fingers, just as soft and silky as you imagined it would be.
When he seemed satisfied with the teasing he was doing, he let his tongue settle over your clit, moving it slowly across the sensitive bundle of nerves. Your breath hitched in your throat as a rush of pleasure flooded through you, reminding you of all he was capable of doing, even with the most miniscule of actions. He used one hand to guide your leg over his shoulder, running his fingers back up until he could grip your hip again. He repeated the action with the other leg, and once he felt you were secure, he pulled you down even further on him. When you grew comfortable with the changes, he brought his fingers back to you and wasted no time in resuming his earlier pace.
“Fuck, Jake.” You hissed, the feeling consuming your entire body once again. He’d pushed you so close to the edge that it wasn’t hard to get you back, and after only a few seconds of steady movement, you could feel the pressure begin to rise again. In response, he curled his fingers upwards again as he pumped them into you, unable to forget the reaction that it prompted from you. You felt yourself clench around him, drawing his hand in further and deeper, intending to keep him there forever.
He took in a sharp breath, loving the way your body responded to his efforts. He thought you were the most enchanting thing he’d ever laid eyes on, and he would happily die between your legs with his name knotted around your tongue. You were so caught up in bliss that you began to believe this was the best it would ever get; no man before Jake had ever made you feel so good, even if they tried ten times harder. Jake was what you had been looking for every night since moving to the city, and if you had been smart, you would have recognized that and took the leap of faith. You were too far gone, spiraling down your self-made rabbit hole, neglecting the idea that he could be more than just good sex in a dingy bar bathroom.
The truth was that you knew all of those things, and worse than that, you could feel it when you were with him, but you were too far gone to ever be able to introduce love to your cold heart. You wanted to love, to be loved, but you no longer had the capacity for such things. The fleeting feeling of an orgasm was powerful, and even if it did not leave you fulfilled for very long, it was preferable to the pain of heartbreak. He made you feel more than you ever had before, but that was what made you want to run. A man met at the bar with sly words and a pretty smile was never good news, and when you took note of the rest of his charming attributes, you knew he was even worse than bad. Jake had the ability to make you see him for more than sex, but he also had the ability to hurt you worse than anyone else.
Drawn by the first touch and stuck there after the second, he was the most devilish of all men; the difference between you and the razor sharp thorns that grew from your skin was that he did not have intent to use his for harm, but you were always looking for a reason to injure. You recognized his deadly beauty because you held the same one in your heart, and you had taken him as someone just like you, neglecting to consider that he was far from it. You did not have enough time or care to make an attempt to see differently, so you continued on with your same old treachery with intent to destroy anything good before it could ever happen.
With expert precision, he kept his fingers in time with his tongue. He could feel how close you were without you having to say a word. The rapid breathing and racing heartbeat, the blushed cheeks and the forehead gleaming with sweat, the eyes squeezed shut and your thighs tightening around his head. It was so powerful that he almost felt the same desperation in his heart, fearing that if he did not get you there you would succumb to the sickness of need. He wanted to talk you through it, to use words of praise instead of the cruel sentiments he had been giving you before. He wanted to be the only thing on your mind, to invade every thought and fibre of your being so you did not even have the opportunity to think of anything else. His work was driven by greed, and he was not ashamed to admit that he would do whatever he could to keep you coming back for more.
The thought of you flirting with his brother had long left his mind, replaced with filthy thoughts of all he could do to you. He knew that Josh did not have the same luxury, and he would be walking home alone without you, while he would spend the entire night entangling you within his soul. He was the only one of the two who was blessed with the privilege of having you, and he would wear the badge with honour until his very last minute on earth.
Once again, his overconfident attitude and foolish naïveté would seal his grave forevermore.
A particularly sharp moan forced him to break out of his thoughts, returning his focus back to you as he continued to push you closer to the edge. “Oh god, Jake.” You cried, feeling the threat of an orgasm creeping up on you once more. It was much stronger and more intense than the last, and your whole body felt ablaze with pleasure. Your heart felt like it would explode out of your chest, and your lungs would deflate. Your head was buzzing with anticipation, and your entire body was tense.
You wondered if it was possible to survive the fall after allowing him to carry you to such heights.
You did not have enough time to worry about death as the knot in your belly snapped under the pressure, unravelling as the feeling took over your entire body. Your thighs squeezed against his skull, locking him there indefinitely as your fingers grasped at the strands of his hair. If not for the counter beneath you and his hand holding you in place, you thought you might descend to hell from the sinful indulgence. You had never felt anything quite like it, as if your soul was being consumed by the irate pleasure that knew not when to stop. Your back arched off the counter, the feeling of his tongue still moving sent you into another wave of euphoria. His fingers inside of you were moving with a fervour, lingering around the sweet spot he’s taken to. It was so much that it was almost nothing at all; so powerful that it was the only thing you knew.
When you came down, you were delirious from the depths of the new world he’d introduced you to. You wondered if you would ever find something that could make you feel that way again, or if you would spend an entire lifetime chasing after a high that only existed when you were with him. Debate on the topic was non-essential, because when he rose from his knees and unbuckled his belt, it did not matter. In fact, nothing in the world mattered except for him.
Recovery was not a conscious choice, because he gave you no other option. Before you were even of sound mind, he’d freed himself from his boxers and resumed his position between your legs, only standing this time. Your orgasm was still glistening on his chin, and he wore it like a trophy as he casted a downward glance at you. Even in the lowlight, every one of his features still appeared so beautifully, as if all of the gods had a helping hand in the creation of him. “Was that what you wanted, angel?” He asked, his voice husky as he watched you with a whole new type of hunger in his eyes. “That’s what you waited all night for?”
“Y-yes, sir.” You stuttered, still gulping for air. Normally, you would feel strange being in such a state in front of anyone, especially when they were as calm as he was, but it did not bother you now. You were perfectly content being at his disposal, ready to give him anything and everything his heart desired.
“Are you ready for more, or you can’t take it?” He asked, reaching down and running a thumb over your burning cheek. Your eyes fluttered closed at the touch, a human reaction to a sweet gesture.
“I can take it, sir.” You promised, your eyes flickering away from his stare and down to his cock. Your mouth watered at the sight, fantasizing momentarily about what it would be like to taste him. You wanted him in every way possible, and any shame about the need was long gone the minute he began to touch you. Your focus was torn away from the beautiful imaginative world you’d thrown yourself into when he spit on his hand, stroking himself for a moment before stepping closer to you.
“You think you can keep being good for me?” He asked, running the tip of his cock through the wetness that remained on your cunt.
“Yes, sir.” You said, confident in your ability to take whatever he had to offer. He rested himself against your entrance, pushing his hips forward only slightly so just his tip rested inside of you.
“That’s my girl,” he said, the possessive claim settling deep in your spine and weighing you down like cement. It felt so good to be called his, even if you did not really want to be. His lips turned upwards into a smile, misleading you only slightly. Then, without warning, he brought one hand to the back of your head. The sudden movement did nothing but confuse you, but when he used his hand resting on your hip to pull you towards him, it appeared there was a method to his madness. Your back landed against the countertop with a loud thud, sending a tingle of pain radiating through your spine, but he used his hand to cushion your head as you fell, ensuring it would not slam against the counter as well.
The mix of pain from the fall and the pleasure from him finally being inside of you was conflicting, but addicting nonetheless. Your hips were off the counter completely now, and once he knew you were well and recovered from the shock, he moved his hand from your head. He loved the accessibility of the new position, and he was eager to begin. With both hands holding your hips steady, he felt comfortable enough to begin moving at a steady pace, but steady did not mean gentle, and your toes were already curling from the sensation as you locked your legs around him.
“Fuck!” You yelped, feeling the tip of his cock slam into the same spot his fingers had been tormenting just moments before. You were more sensitive than ever due to the earth shattering orgasm he’d just given you, and the feeling of him inside you was overwhelming.
“I thought you said you could take it, sweetheart?” He taunted, delivering another sharp thrust to the same area. Your legs quivered from the sensation and your throat was raw from the moans flowing steadily through it. You could not respond, the pleasurable pain was so intense that it was impossible to focus on anything else. He wondered for a moment if he was giving you more than you could handle, but the thought quickly vanished when he felt your legs tighten around him and pull him closer. It was enough of an answer for him, but you pulled yourself together enough to fight back.
“Don’t give yourself too much credit, honey.” You smirked. “You call this fucking?” His eyes blazed red in an instant, as if your words turned him into an entirely different entity. Your desire to fight never fled, and his antagonism was just enough to bring it back out.
“You’re gonna be a little brat after I was so nice to you?” He said, drilling his hips into you even more harshly. The feeling seemed to take your breath away, but you tried your best to stand your ground. “Or do you want me to treat you like a whore?” He raised an eyebrow, somehow unphased by the speed in which his hips were moving. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
“Fuck, yes.” You whined, arching your back against the countertop to meet the thrust of his hips. You knew you could not handle any more, but you needed it all the same. Everything about him was conflicting and it only ever made you want more.
“You like being a little slut for me, don’t you?” He pressed further, letting his hands wander down your legs.
“I love it, sir.” You corrected, feeling his fingers tighten around your ankles as he pulled your legs apart, keeping his touch gentle as he tortured you with his hips. He brought your legs up, straightening them before pushing them upwards and into your chest. He leaned forward, locking you into position and slipped an arm underneath you to support your weight.
“Show me how much you love it, sweetheart.” He ordered, his expression stern as he continued to fuck into you. His movements were causing your knees to push back into your chest, constricting you in the most intoxicating way. “I want you to cum again, on my cock this time.” The vulgarity of his words made your walls tighten around him, making the sensation even more intense. “Can you do that for me?”
“I can,” you whimpered, feeling the pressure rising again. He was pushing you to the limit just so he could watch you as he drove you to insanity. Every movement was amplified by a million with the new position, and that wasn’t even considering how your skin was still tingling with the ghost of your previous orgasm. If his intent was to send you mad, he was doing a damn good job.
“How’s this for fucking?” He growled, looking down at your face. You were so strung out on pleasure that you could barely keep your eyes open, but that was exactly what he was hoping for. “Is this good enough for you, angel?” The pet name was laced with distaste now, showing his anger for your snide comment. You realized as you caught his eye that there was a whole other side of Jake you had yet to discover, and one night would not be enough for you to know him as much as you would like. You had no idea how a man so ethereal could turn so animalistic in an instant, and it only confused you further when you realized you liked that side of him more, because only you could see it.
You were desperate for him to slow down; the climax was barreling towards you at the speed of light, and you could not keep up with it. At the same time, you knew that if he stopped, you would be on your knees in an instant to beg him for more. The very thing you needed to survive would ultimately be the thing that killed you, and your relationship with the man between your legs had been vile from the very beginning. It started on lies and deceit, and carried on after betrayal and mistrust. Nothing good could ever grow from something so rotten, yet the two of you joined together in a pivotal moment of your lives; you would never be the same again, and neither would he. Despite the evil that forced the two of you together, you knew you would not change it for the world.
You were broken from your thoughts when a sharp sting flashed across your cheek. He was expecting an answer, and he was not willing to go without one, so he did what he could to regain your attention. Your eyes shot open, focusing in on the face glaring down at you. His hand had moved back to hold your hip, as if he’d never struck you at all. It took you a moment to clue in to what he had done, because you were too busy trying to sear the sight of his face into your memory for the rest of time. His hair was sticking to his skin, his shirt hanging off his body as the buttons came undone from the constant movements. He was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, and you were lucky to have him, even if you did feel regret for using him in such a way.
“Fucking answer me.” He hissed, wondering if he would need to slap you again to pry the words from your lips. Under your foundation, the skin had already began blotching with redness at the forceful contact, but you didn’t seem to care. If anything, you wondered what you could do to get him to do it again. “Is this good enough for you, or do you still need more?”
“It’s good, sir. It’s so fucking good.” You rushed the words out, knowing that if you did not answer, his next punishment might not be so enjoyable.
“That’s what I thought, sweetheart.” His chest was heaving, trying to keep up with his rapid pace. You could feel his movements getting sloppy, but he would not give up until he got one more orgasm out of you.
Your hips began to ache from the position they were in, so you made an attempt to straighten one of your legs out to wrap it around him again. He noticed your struggle, moving back slightly to allow you to do as you needed. Once your legs are locked in place around his waist once more, he held one hand to your hip to keep you steady and snaked his other hand up your body, settling his fingers around your neck. Your stomach fluttered at the new position, excited for him to continue on with his work.
“I need you to cum for me, angel.” He said, carefully settling his fingers over your pulse points, looking over your face for a shred of discomfort. When he found none, it seemed to send him into a whole new frenzy. The knowledge that you would let him do as he pleased with you was driving him to insanity, and he began to regret not bringing you to the bathroom sooner. You were a mess, your dress bunched up around your ribs now, and your tits still free from the top of it. Your mascara was running down your cheeks and your hair was a mess, but he thought you were just as stunning as you were when he first laid eyes on you. “Can you do that for me, baby?”
“Yes, sir.” You choked out, feeling his fingers tightening around your neck. Your eyes closed as you willed yourself to give in to the feeling. The need for a release was unbearable, and your stomach was ablaze with the threat of another climax. As his fingers continued to tighten around your jugular, your head began to spin from the lack of blood flow. The pleasure already coursing through your veins seemed to increase tenfold, and there was no more holding back.
The orgasm tore through you with an intensity that made your whole body tremble. The world felt like it was crashing down around you and your lungs ached for a breath of air. You tried to speak his name, but even that failed you. Your legs trembled around him, exhausted from being held in such a position for so long. You wanted to close your eyes, to give in to the feeling and let it take over. You feared you might die from it, and it was such a peaceful feeling that you felt no need to fight it.
As your body relaxed about the counter, he released his hold on your neck. The sudden rush of air seemed to force you back into reality, and your head slowly stopped spinning. You felt Jake’s hips stutter as he uttered a few curses under his breath. You opened your eyes in just enough time to watch him pull out of you, quickly stepping towards you as he stroked himself a few times. You quickly jumped to action, reaching down and knocking his hand out of the way. It took him by surprise, but when your hand wrapped around him and continued with his previous movements, his head fell back in bliss. It was fast enough that it did not make him lose the momentum, and he was grateful for you taking the control. His eyes squeezed shut as he let out a low groan, spilling his release on to your stomach. You let out a ragged breath, looking down at the mess he’d made, his cock still throbbing in your hand as you worked himself through the last few seconds of his own orgasm.
A shiver ran down his spine as you withdrew your hand. He straightened up, heaving a heavy sigh as he looked down at you, soaking up the last few seconds of having you like that. You gave him a small smile in return, another shred of evil making its way into your brain. You slowly brought your hand to your stomach, making sure to maintain the eye contact. Meticulously, you brought your finger to the cum he’d decorated your stomach with, still warm and inviting. You saw his eyes shift down towards your hand, watching as you ran your finger through it, delicate and soft. When you felt as though he had a good enough of an idea for what you were about to do, you brought your finger to your mouth, parting your lips slightly as you pushed your finger to your tongue. You ran it across the pad of your forefinger, letting out a soft moan as you let your eyes flutter closed.
A soft sound emitted from his throat, close to a whine but a little too deep to be classified as such. You had pushed him over the edge, and if he could have gotten away with it, he would have fucked you again right then and there. Instead, he reached for the paper towel dispenser, ripping off a few sheets and cleaning off your stomach as best he could, despite wishing he could witness you do it all over again. He tossed the used paper in the trash after wiping himself off, then pulled his pants back up.
“Get up,” he said, buckling his belt and adjusting himself to conceal the hard-on that was reluctant to go away.
“What?”
“You can’t listen?” He snapped. “Get the fuck up.” He repeated, clearly still feeding off the sexual energy lingering in the air.
“W-why?” You stuttered, almost expecting him to return to normal after you finished. The brash nature of his voice took you by surprise, but you certainly didn’t mind.
“Because I’m going to take you home, and I’m going to fuck you again.” He explained, stepping forward and landing a soft hand on your thigh. “And again… and probably again after that, until you can’t fucking walk and the only thing you know how to say is my name.” A flood of arousal rushed through you, making your heart beat faster once again. Usually, you would laugh at such a claim, but you knew he was not bluffing in the slightest. With that, he leaned down and grabbed your thong from the ground, looking it over as he held it in his palm. You figured he would give it to you, so you extended your arm out to grab it, but he sent you a sly look through the corner of his eye. Instead of passing them to you, he slipped it in his pocket as a trophy for his night’s endeavour and turned to face you. “What are you waiting for, sweetheart?”
‘Nothing’ was the only proper answer, so you scrambled to your feet to straighten yourself out, already excited for the rest of the night. As you cleaned your makeup in the mirror, you glanced at him over your shoulder, wondering if you could handle all of the things he had in store for you. As you watched him watching you, your stomach fluttered with nervousness, and your heart began to swell with adoration. You could handle whatever he wanted to do for you, but you hoped you could handle it well enough to entertain his brother the night after.
No matter how good he was, nobody was ever good enough to subdue a player like you. You would get your way, just like you did every time, but this time was different; it came with a cost too high to justify. Then again, you lived for a thrill, and there was nothing you weren’t willing to gamble for just a taste of what you desired. As he led you out the front door of the bar with a lingering hand on your waist, you revelled in the bliss of his touch all while fantasizing about what it would feel like to be touched by Josh instead. It made you wonder just how far you could take it before it became too much.
As the two of you walked hand in hand, the vicious cycle continued, and soon enough, you knew that ultimately, a punishment would be due. In your purse, your phone had already been ravished by drunk texts from the brother you had yet to entertain, but could not wait to have for yourself. You knew better, but the idea of having the both of them was too good to pass up. Greed was a wicked motivator, and it was plaguing you. You could only hope that punishment in the eyes of the devil, and especially given by the twin brothers, would be enjoyable more than it would be painful.
TAGLIST: @gretavangroupie @wetkleenex-gvf @edgingthedarkness @clairesjointshurt @jordie-gvf @lallisonl @writingcold @dannys-dream @ageofbajabule @GVFstuddedmajesty @mackalah @watchingover-hypegirl @earthgrlsreasy @blacksoul-27 @ur-m0ms-blog @Lyndz2names @gretavanomens @josh-iamyour-mama @gretavangirlie @cxffeecakez @stardustjake @highway-tuna @peaceloveunitygvf @dancingcarbon @kiszkas-canvas @thewritingbeforesunrise @myownparadise96 @just-ambam @jakeyt @joshym @demonrat444 @pattypanini @itsafullmoon (if I accidentally missed someone, please let me know 🤍)
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sacredjake · 11 months ago
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pairing: Josh Kiszka x Reader
word count: 3.7k
warnings: 18+ MDNI!! cussing, alcohol consumption, mentions of weed, smut, praise kink, very slight degradation, spanking, rough sex, overstimulation, hate sex, unprotected sex
welcome to the first of four collabs that @gold-mines-melting and i have planned! we hope yall enjoy this enemies to lovers josh fic that we planned out :)
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“You’re going to Jake’s party tonight, right?” 
“Yes, Jenna, of course I’m going to Jake’s party. We talked about this like last week.” You set your phone down on your bathroom counter and pulled out your makeup bag. 
“I know that, Y/n, but you also said you considered not going just so you wouldn’t have to deal with Josh.” 
She wasn’t wrong. You had said you were debating not going to your mutual friend’s party just because of his twin brother. Jake was one of your closest friends, so of course if he was throwing a shindig you wanted to go, but Josh made it so hard to be around most of the time. 
You and Josh had once been close. In fact, at one point a long time ago, you really liked him and you thought he liked you back. However, that hope was quickly stripped away and the feelings you had towards him grew into loathing when he started treating you horribly. He constantly made rude, snarky comments to you and about you, and made sure to really kick you when you were down. And you had no idea why. 
“I’m not gonna let Josh ruin a great New Year’s Eve party.” You began applying your foundation as you spoke. 
“Good. I gotta start getting ready so I’ll see you later.” 
“For sure.” You agreed and let her hang up so you could blend the foundation out. You quickly finished up your festive makeup, and slipped on your sparkly dress and heels. 
When you arrived at Jake’s house you were pretty positive that you had been the first, if not the only, to arrive. While there was still an open spot in the driveway you pulled into the spot in front of Jake’s garage. You didn’t bother locking your car and headed straight for the front door. Just as you were walking up the path leading to his house you could hear a car loudly making its way down the road. Out of habit you turned towards the noise to see who it could be. 
Of course it had to be Josh. And of course instead of pulling into the open spot next to you he decided to park behind you. Completely blocking you in. Asshole. 
“You couldn’t park in the completely open spot next to me?” You nearly shout mostly to be heard as Josh exits his jeep. 
“You’re the one that parked in my spot, sweetheart.” 
“I’m sorry? Your spot?” You can’t help but stare at him completely baffled by his entitlement. You also can’t help but notice how nice he looked. His mullet was curled and fluffed up nicely, and his outfit, an elegant suit over his usual white crewneck, flattered his slender frame very nicely. You mentally scolded yourself for even thinking about it. Josh paid you no mind however, and walked past you. 
“That’s what I said.” 
It took you a moment to get moving again, but you started following him towards the door, you were hot on his heels. He had already managed to piss you off before he even left his car. 
“This isn’t even your house, Josh. How in the hell is that your spot.” 
Josh didn’t bother knocking on the door and instead just let himself in. Had it not been for the two of you arguing, rather loudly, Jake probably wouldn’t have known you were there. You and Josh were bickering so intensely that it was actually Jake's presence that went unnoticed. 
“You’re a self-entitled prick.” You pointed your finger at him, your chest puffed up and practically touched his. 
“And you’re a selfish brat!” He spat back. 
“Hey! Whoa!” Jake finally decided to intervene and pushed his brother back gently with his arm. “What the fuck could the two of you be arguing about?! You just got here!” 
“Little miss ‘I only think about myself’ here parked in my spot!” 
“How arrogant do you have to be to claim you have a parking spot at someone else’s house?!” You started to move in closer to Josh when you felt a pair of hands grip your shoulders. 
“That’s enough, you two. It’s fucking New Year’s Eve.”
Somewhere between fighting with Josh outside and walking inside, Sam and Danny had arrived to help set up. Danny was currently holding you back. 
“Josh get your ass in the kitchen and help me put out the food. Y/n go with Sam and Danny to set up the living room. I don’t wanna hear either of you say a peep to or about the other. Got it?” Jake demanded. The only response either of you gave was an unhappy mumble of agreement. 
For the next hour you and Josh had been separated by his brothers. It was definitely for the best. 
You, Danny and Sam worked together to finish the decorations up in the living room and set up a cocktail and champagne station. Meanwhile in the kitchen, Jake and his twin set out all the food and the full bar. When a few of your friends showed up Sam and Danny were nowhere to be found. You had assumed that they were making their rounds talking to everyone, but you spotted them almost hiding away with Jake, deep in a private conversation. 
With more party-goers showing up it was easier to keep your distance from Josh. The lights had been dimmed, and you were feeling pleasantly tipsy after a cocktail. You drifted from person to person catching up and saying hi, enjoying the glamor of the evening. Some people you didn’t know and would introduce yourself to. Eventually Sam found you while you were free from company. 
“Hey, Y/n, I need you to go down into Jake’s basement and get another bottle of champagne.” 
“Yeah, sure. Is there a certain brand I’m looking for?” 
Sam’s lips pulled up at the corner in an almost sly grin. “You’ll know it when you see it.” Without another word he walked away leaving you to retrieve the bottle. 
You made your way to the door that led down into the basement and began the familiar descent down. There had been countless nights with your close friends spent in Jake’s basement just drinking, playing games and getting high. Not bothering to close the door behind you, you walked carefully down the steps. 
“Dude I’m not seeing a bottle of champagne anywhere.” A voice called out from the room below you. 
Josh. 
He must’ve thought you were Jake coming to check on him. Before he realized it was you and not his twin, you turned and practically bolted up the stairs. You saw a glimpse of Sam on the other side of the door along with Jake and Danny before it slammed shut. The next sound you heard was a lock clicking into place. 
“You have got to be joking!” You shouted and banged your fists on the door.
“Y/n? What the hell did you do?” 
You turned around to meet Josh’s eyes. He was about more than halfway up the stairs, a puzzled look on his face. 
“I didn’t do shit! They slammed the door and locked us in here!” You wiggled the handle furiously hoping to god it would open. 
“You can’t be fucking serious.” Josh closed the distance and basically squished you against the wall. He repeated your previous action. Clearly the door wasn’t going to open. 
“Oh we’re serious alright. No one is allowed to enter or exit until the two of you have worked your shit out.” Jake’s voice came from the other side of the door. 
“Open the goddamn door, assholes!” Josh pounded his fist against the wood this time. 
On the other side of the door there was nothing. Clearly all of them decided not to stick around. Seeing that standing there waiting around was pointless, you turned and walked down the stairs before flopping defeated onto the couch. 
Great. You were trapped in a room for god knows how long with a man you despised. As if on cue, the devil himself thundered down the steps. 
“This is all your fault!” He seethed, finger pointed at you as he walked over. 
“My fault?!” 
“Yeah, had you not parked in my spot we wouldn’t be down here right now!” He was looming over you now. 
“Do you even hear yourself?!” You stood up causing him to back up quickly but the coffee table between you ensured he couldn’t go anywhere. “Any sane person would have just parked NEXT to my car, but no! You had to block me in because I parked in a spot of a house you DON’T EVEN LIVE IN!” You shoved your pointer finger into his chest to drive the point home further. 
“I think you need to go back to Kindergarten when we were taught to keep our hands to ourselves.” His voice was calm and collected unlike yours, but you could tell he was fuming. It only served to irk you even further. 
“Fuck. You. Josh.” You pressed your finger into him with every word and craned your neck upwards even more, invading his space just to make him break. 
This was the closest you had been to Josh in a very, very long time. Even when you were arguing earlier you hadn’t been this close. His sweet but musky scent invaded every sense and you had to keep yourself from looking at his lips. 
“Y/n,” You could see the anger flare in his eyes, “I would suggest you take your finger off me.” You could feel his chest rising rapidly underneath the sole digit.
“What are you,” Another thrust of your finger into his sternum, “gonna do about it?” 
In an instant his lips crashed into yours. It was like your mouth moved of its own accord melding into his. Your hands fisted themselves in the collar of his white crewneck sweatshirt and pulled him closer. His hands were firm on your waist, fingers pulling you to him. The kiss was sloppy and rushed. Everything was moving a million miles a second. 
Josh’s hands moved back over your hips to grab your asscheeks and gave them a firm squeeze. You bit down hard on his lip and tugged on it earning a groan from him. One of his hands gripped itself in the hair at the base of your skull and pulled enough to cause slight discomfort, but not enough to pull you away. 
The kiss only got more heated, groans and moans escaping both your lips. After a few moments you were craving more and found your fingers working to undo his belt. His hands slid underneath the hem of your dress and teased around the top of your underwear before dipping further, but still he avoided everywhere you needed him. Not wanting to play into his game, you pushed his slacks and boxers past his hips, freeing him completely. 
“Eager are we?” Josh didn’t even bother pulling his lips from yours. 
“Are you going to play with my underwear all night or are you gonna fuck me?” 
“Need it that bad huh?” 
“Fuck. You.” 
“Oh you’re about to. Turn around and bend over.” He took your hips in his hands and forced you to turn around. You followed his second instruction, bracing your hands on the back of the couch. With his foot he kicked your legs further apart and ran two fingers over your covered cunt. As he ran them back up the length of your slit towards your clit he curled his fingers on the edge of the fabric. He bunched the skirt of your dress up over your hips and slowly pulled your underwear to the side, watching the wetness that clung to them stretch. 
“Any day now would be fucking great, Jo-” 
All of the air was ripped from your lungs as he buried himself into you fully. He didn’t give you any time to recover before pulling out of you almost completely and driving back in repeatedly. You’d be lying if you said he didn’t know what he was doing. With every thrust he successfully hit that spot that made your core tighten and pitchy moans leave your mouth. 
“Don’t have much to say now, do you princess?” There was no slowing his pace, and in fact you thought it even got faster and harder. 
In a matter of a few minutes he had already brought you to the edge of an orgasm. You could feel yourself staring down the abyss, but you just needed one final push. Using the small amount of leverage you had, you pushed your hips back to meet his and arched your back ever so slightly. The small change in position had you practically barreling towards your climax. 
“Oh fuck! Fuck, fuck, Josh. Just like that. God don’t fucking stop, I’m about to- I’m gonna- Fuck me, Josh.” You sounded desperate and whiny, but you couldn’t find it in you to care. 
“You sound so pretty when you beg for my cock.” Continuing his space, Josh spread his hands over your ass, pulling your cheeks apart and stretching you even further. His right hand released your ass before coming down hard on the sensitive skin. The blow he delivered was the last push you needed into your high, and he fucked you through it. 
“Look at my favorite brat cumming for me. That’s it, baby, let ‘em know how good it is.” 
Even when you had finally come down, Josh never once stopped his hips and chased his own high. His pace had slowed somewhat, but the obscene sounds of his skin slapping against yours only grew louder from how wet you were. 
“Josh I-” You were cut off by your own moan. It was becoming too much and you were oversensitive. 
“I know, I know. Just give me one more.” His hand snaked down in front of you and rubbed slow, tight circles on your clit. His voice was far softer than it had been in the longest time. “C’mon, just one more.” It sounded almost like a plea. His lips ghosted the shell of your ear, his chest grazing over your back. 
With his free hand, Josh moved your hair away from your neck and began leaving slow, open-mouthed kisses to your neck. He could feel you relax more underneath him, the discomfort turning to pleasure again. Keeping his attention on your clit, his hips started to speed up once more. You could feel the coil in your core tighten again, but much faster this time. 
“God, you feel so fucking good.” 
Once again he was ramming into you, but at a much slower pace and each brutal thrust of his hips bringing you that much closer to your second orgasm of the night. At this speed you were able to push back onto him more easily. After a few moments, Josh’s hips stilled completely, letting you take control. You sped up your hips and angled them with every push and pull, fucking yourself on his hard cock. 
“Yeah that’s it, just like that.” His hand came into contact with your ass again forcing you to gasp in a pleasured sigh. “That’s it, baby, you fuck me so good.” Another slap landed to your backside and you were almost there. 
“Just a little bit more. Keep going. So, so good.” The praises tumbled from his mouth with ease and you were eating it up. 
With what little control you had left, you sped up your hips and slammed back on him repeatedly. His hands were gripping your hips so hard you were sure there would be bruises. You weren't going to last much longer. 
“Josh I’m gonna cum, please.” 
His hands stopped your hips from moving so he could take over. The pace he set this time was almost as fast and hard as when he first entered you. His right hand found your clit again while his left gently pushed your lower back down to increase the angle he was slamming into at. Your fingers were digging into the couch cushions, knuckles turning white from how hard you were gripping them.
Just as before, with a firm smack to your ass you were pushed into your second orgasm of the night. You weren’t sure if you were making noise or not, the rush of adrenaline dulled every sense that wasn’t burning pleasure. Josh pulled out shortly after you came, catching sight of your cunt fluttering around nothing while he pumped himself a few more times. He braced himself against the back of the couch with his hand next to yours and his chest almost leaned fully on your back as he came on your lower back and ass. 
As soon as he caught his breath he moved off you with only a simple, “Don’t move.” You did as he asked and stayed put, but mainly because you didn’t wanna risk getting cum on your dress. A few seconds later you were being wiped off with some kind of cloth before he carefully moved your underwear back in place. 
“You should be good.” 
“Thanks...” You stood up slightly confused and let the skirt of your dress fall back over your hips.
Josh threaded his belt back through the buckle and sat down on the couch. You felt awkward just standing there, but you weren’t sure what to say. He had been nice to you which you weren’t used to. And just gave you some of the best sex you’ve had in a very, very long time. 
“Well that is not how I envisioned our first time going.” Josh rubbed his hands down his face and leaned back into the couch. 
Once again you were confused. What did he mean by that? 
“Our first time? Like you’ve thought about it?” 
Josh didn’t say anything and instead stared at you like he hadn’t realized he said it out loud. 
“And why were you being nice to me? You’re always such an ass, I thought you hated me.” He took a deep sigh and thought for a moment before speaking. 
“I don’t hate you, Y/n.” His voice was soft and quiet. “I don’t think I’ve ever actually hated you. I think I was just hurt.” 
“Hurt? You’ve treated me like shit all this time because you were hurt? What the hell did I ever do to you?” You couldn’t help the animosity seeping into your tone. You were pissed off. He was the one that started treating you like shit out of nowhere. 
“Please, Y/n, don’t pretend you don’t know what you did.” Defeated anger laced his voice, his eyes slicing but still soft in a way. 
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Josh. Please enlighten me!” 
“You ditched our gig for a date!” He stood from the couch and faced you, his hands flailing about. “I had specifically invited you to our home show for Strange Horizons and had passes for you and you blew us off for a date with your coworker!” He leaned in closer to you, invading your space more and more. 
“Josh I-“
“I planned to sing Unchained Melody for you and then after the show I was gonna finally tell you how I felt because I thought you felt the same!”
You knew exactly which show he was talking about but he had the information wrong. 
“Josh, I did feel the same way… And I never stood you up for a date.” 
“But-“ You grabbed his hands and gave them a light squeeze. 
“I got stuck at work. The person who was supposed to cover my shift backed out at the last minute and I had to go in. I couldn’t find anyone else to cover me on such short notice. I never had a date. My coworker canceled on me for a date.” 
He looked absolutely dumbfounded. It was like the pieces were clicking into place for him.
“Oh god I am the stupidest man alive.” You smiled at him softly and threaded your fingers with his. 
“No you’re not. It was a miscommunication. It happens.” 
“Yeah, but I wasted the past year being so awful to you. Had I just asked you about it then maybe we could’ve…” You cut him off with a soft peck to his lips. 
“Hey, it’s a new year, right?” 
“Right.” He checked his watch. “Looks like we missed midnight,” he noted playfully, “but we definitely got our New Year's kiss.”
You giggled at that. Josh pulled you closer and smiled down at you fondly before giving you another quick kiss. “Let’s hope they didn’t forget about us.” He snickered, keeping one hand entwined with yours and walking towards the stairs. When he tried the handle it gave way with ease and the door swung open. He led the two of you back out into the house still holding your hand. 
“Well it’s about damn time!” Sam hollered pointing at your hand in Josh’s. Whoops and more excited cheering followed making both of your cheeks flame. 
“Do you wanna get out of here?” Josh turned to you with bright red cheeks but with a smile that overtook his entire face. You nodded, not wanting to have to deal with how obnoxious your friends will be all night. 
“Guess it doesn’t even matter that he blocked you in now!” Danny called after the two of you. You tried to make a quick getaway with everyone adding their two senses to the subject, all in favor of the two of you getting over yourselves. 
Both of you just laughed at Danny’s comment and exited Jake’s house towards Josh’s Jeep. He opened the door for you to hop in the passenger side and made his way around to the driver’s side. Josh pulled his phone out to put on some music and chuckled to himself. He flipped the phone around to show you what amused him. 
It was a text he had gotten while you were stuck in the basement. 
Jake: Went to check on you to make sure neither of you murdered the other. Definitely didn’t sound like either of you were in danger… Not what I intended, but glad you worked your shit out. Don’t fuck it up this time. 
The two of you rang in the new year at Josh’s house with an actual bottle of champagne and even more fireworks than the ones going off all around. 
--------------------------------------------------------
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so-sangthearcher · 6 months ago
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The Lovers, The Dreamers, And Us || Josh kiszka x F!reader
Warnings: recreational drug use
Pure fluff, crack treated seriously tbh
wc: 1.7k
-
Josh had invited you over for a night in with him and the boys.
You knew what that meant. Getting high off their fancy, expensive weed, and getting loose with each other while step brothers plays on the large screen in the background. Ten minutes after getting the message, you were in a soft sweater, grabbing your bag that was full of snacks, and heading out the door. They only lived about 15 minutes away, so you decided to send Josh a text, letting him know you were on your way. Upon your arrival, you noticed that Josh’s jeep was the only car in the drive way. This made you raise your eyebrow, but you figured they were still on their way.
You parked and made your way to the door, knocking with the jaunty tune of “shave and a haircut,” alerting Josh to your presence. You stood back, shifting from foot to foot while you waited for him to let you in. In true Josh fashion, he took his sweet time. Just as you were about to knock again, the door came swinging open, a slight plume of smoke making its way out onto the porch. “I see you got started with out me,” you hummed, eyeing him as you pushed your way past him, making yourself out home with no hesitance. You met his eye as he grinned at you. “You sure keep me in check, don’t you,” he laughed, making his way over to the couch that you had settled yourself on. You let your head fall back against the plush cushion, watching as Josh reached for the bong, making sure the cherry was still bright, and producing smoke. He took a deep inhale, smirking at the way the water bubbled, before letting the smoke settle in his lungs and pushing it out. He thrust the glass object towards you, shaking it lightly. You rolled your eyes and grabbed it, taking a decent hit to get yourself started. “I usually wait for the others, y’know,” you teased, the last little bit of smoke flowing through your lips as you talked. Josh shifted in his spot next to you, “Yeah.” He signed, letting his head roll to the side so he was facing you. “They aren’t coming.”
“What?” You asked, a little startled, “Why not?”
Josh groaned, “Danny roped the other two into going out tonight, after I had already invited you. But I didn’t want to cancel on you, so… I figured you and I could keep up the tradition.”
It wasn’t uncommon for this type of thing to occur. Though, there was something different about getting high with just Josh. Something… Tender, secretive, yearning almost.
You giggled and sighed, letting the weed make its way into your psyche. “It’s fine, they’re a bunch of weenies. We’ll just get high enough for all of them.” You said, matter-of-factly. Josh nodded in agreement, your glassy eyes meeting each other for a second that was just too long to be platonic. You tore your eyes away, grabbing your bag and plopping it down in between the two of you. “We feast,” you said, tone flourishing, as you grabbed the copious amount of junk food you had stuffed in there. “Ugh, you are, an angel,” Josh groaned as he packed another bowl, eyeing the selection you had laid out in front of him. He held the flame under the bowl, letting the glass heat, small plumes of smoke rising from the bowl. He took another hit, letting the smoke permeate his lungs before grabbing a bag of hot Cheetos and tearing it open. “The heartburn is gonna be wild,” He sighed, releasing the smoke from his lung. You rummaged around in your bag before pulling out the tums, slapping the bottle in his hand, “I came prepared,” you said, watching the dopey smile spread across his face. “My angel,” he sighed, repeating the term of endearment from earlier. Your cheeks burned, there was that yearning feeling again.
The peaceful atmosphere and your altered state heightened these feelings, making them harder to ignore. It wasn’t like you were ignorant to your feelings about Josh, it’s just that they were that much more obvious in this room alone, with your thighs pressing against Josh’s. You allowed yourself to feel, letting your head fall onto his shoulder, cheeks heating once more as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. You sat up, grabbing the bong, taking a few more deep hits, letting your head spin. “Jesus, y/n, we have plenty to go around, it isn’t going anywhere.” Josh laughed, you laughed too, for a reason unbeknownst the the both of you, before you were laid over in his lap in a fit of giggles. You let your head rest against his thighs as your laughter settled, his hands tangling themselves into your hair.
You could feel the way his stomach rose and fell with his breath.
You shifted so you were looking up at him, only a little bit surprised to find him looking back, eyes glassy, a wide smile across his face as he continued to play with your hair. You smiled at the feeling of his hands, letting your eyes fall shut, laughing softly at the familiar sound of Will Ferrel and John C. Reiley arguing about drum kits. “That’s Sam and Danny,” You stuttered out, laughing at your own joke before it even finished leaving your lips. You watched as Josh threw his head back and laughed loudly, body moving as he did so. He wiped his eyes, taking a breath, before spluttering into laughter once more, you following suit, tears pricking at your eyes.
You loved these moments, blissful, unashamed belly laughs, were sure to cure the things of the world. You quited down, eyes still on Josh, as they always seemed to be lately. He bent over slightly, face resting just above yours. “You are one of a kind, angel.” He breathed, you could feel his breath hitting your lips. “I could say the same thing about you, Mr. Kiszka, super famous rockstar.” You sighed, eyes flicking down to his lips, and back up to meet his eyes. “Please, you’ve always been the better singer. Writing those songs, just for you to sing them to an empty room. Though, no body would be worthy of hearing a voice as beautiful as yours,” He said softly. You looked away, lips parting. “Sing to me,” Josh said, leaning back, head falling against the couch once more as his fingers resumed their movements in your hair.
“Why are there so many, songs about rainbows…” You started softly, holding back the giggles, “and what’s on the other side,” Josh finished, voice coming out strained and nasally in a poor attempt to mimic kermit the frog. “Rainbows are visions, but only illusions. So we’ve been told and some choose to believe it. I know they’re wrong, wait and see.” Your voice was soft, “Some day we’ll find it, the rainbow connection…” Your voice slowed as Josh leaned back over you, returning to the close proximity. “The lovers, the dreamers, and me,” you finished, blinking slowly at the man above you. You shifted, sitting up, before maneuvering yourself into Josh’s lap. “Am I reading this wrong?” You asked, feeling suddenly bold, the weed taking away your inhibitions. Josh shook his head slowly, leaning in ever so slightly, inviting you to close the gap, and so you did. Your lips met softly, kiss deepening as you got used to the feeling of each other.
The door swung open, banging against the wall, “WHERE’S THE P-“ Sam’s voice bellowed, stoping at the sight of you and Josh in a somewhat compromising position. You pulled away from him, startled at the new presence. “Hey guys,” Josh giggled, “Y/n its supposed to go ‘the lovers, the dreamers and ME’ not ‘the lovers, the dreamers and SAM,” Josh choked out, smile practically breaking his face in half. You squawked, laughter bubbling up from your chest, you leaned into Josh, head falling on his shoulder.
You caught your breath, just for your eyes to land an a semi drunk Sam, Danny, and Jake who were still awkwardly standing in the doorway, making your laughter start up again. “I think we need to be on their level,” Danny says, walking deeper into the house before settling next to you and Josh on the couch. “What so were going to start kissing each other? Revealing deep-seated feelings for each other?” Jake laughed, flopping down on to the rocking chair in the corner. “You have feelings for me?” You whispered, searching Josh’s eyes. “You haven’t told her? Josh what the fu-“ Sam started cut off by Jake and Danny simultaneously shushing him. Josh rolled his eyes, “Way to ruin it Sammy, but yes. Y/n, I like you,” he sighed, “Love, he means love,” Sam interrupted. “Jesus, Sam! We’re having a fucking moment, pack a bowl or something!” You hissed, earning snickers from Jake and Danny, before turning your attention back to Josh. “Yes, I love you. I would give up everything if It meant I would be able to just sing kermit the frog with you, I’d never smoke again if it meant I get to hold you, I’d smoke every day if it meant I get to hold you like this again. Even if it was just for a second,” Josh rambled. You giggled, quieting him with a kiss, “I love you, so much, Josh. I alway have.” You admitted, planting one more kiss on his plush lips. Cheering erupted from the other side of the room. “Finally!” Jake cheered, fake British accent making an appearance as the weed and alcohol mixed.
You smiled and rolled your eyes fondly, resting your forehead on Josh’s. “Can you believe those guys,” Josh scoffed before smirking, “C’mon babe. Pack us another bowl.” You flushed at the nickname, knowing the truth it held. You moved from your straddling position, grabbing the extra bong on the table and packing it, before flopping back down into Josh’s lap, throwing your legs over Danny’s.
That secretive, tender feeling, was now filling up the room, and you couldn’t be happier about it. You and Josh should’ve gotten high together without the boys a lot sooner, but you were looking forward to the new moments you two were going to share, rather than the ones you may have missed out on.
-
hehe i hope yall liked this
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losfacedevil · 5 months ago
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Fallin’ All In You / JMK
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a/n~ This is one of my most self indulgent Josh & Sunny pieces to date, it’s been rattling around my brain all week! Enjoy ☺️
You knew by the huff of breath that slipped past his nose and the way he kicked his shoes off as he walked through the door that it had been a long day. Peeling your body away from where you had been melting into the couch, you stood and slowly made you way into the kitchen. 
Josh stood at the kitchen sink, washing his hands of the days dirt and grime; another successful day helping his mom clean out their family home. You sauntered up behind him and wrapped your arms gently around his waist, burying your face in between his shoulder blades. The unmistakable smell of his deodorant and the mustiness of his parents basement clung to his warm skin. 
You couldn’t help but giggle as he lathered up his arms, washing away the dust that clung to him and knew full well he would end up jumping in the shower later. He bummed softly as he washed up and reveled in the feeling of your arms around him. 
“How was your day, Sunny?” He spoke softly, as if he didn’t want to disturb the peace the house held. A soft smile caressed your lips and you tilted your head back, resting your chin where your forehead once lay. 
“It was okay… quiet. I got a good chunk of reading done but… I missed you.” You cooed, squeezing your arms gently around him. A soft sigh slipped past his lips and his hands found yours, letting his fingers dance gently over the back of your hands in a silent request for you to loosen your grip. Taking half of a step back, you unwound your arms from around his waist and waited as he spun in your grasp. 
“Mom asked how you were and why you didn’t tag along. I told her you needed some you time and had no social battery.” Josh chuckled and leaned down to press a soft kiss to your forehead. A soft smile caressed your lips as your gaze found his, eyes so big and a rich deep brown that made if feel like they were swallowing you whole. 
“I’ll come visit next time so she won’t miss me so much.” You giggled softly and took in his appearance. His skin was sun kissed, no doubt from sitting out by their pool as he ate whatever Jake had whipped up on the grill for lunch, his dark eyes half hooded as the days exhaustion began to weigh down on him now that he was home, and his taller than life mullet was stamped down just a bit from the dust that had settled between the strands. 
“Hey, you have… can I?” You spoke softly and pointed at the pieces of fuzz that had found a home in Josh’s hair. He nodded gently and tipped his head, tickling your nose with the stray strands that stuck up on the top of his head. Blowing a soft, and cool stream of air out through pursed lips, you kept the hairs tickling your face at bay as you picked out the small pieces of fuzz that had gotten trapped in his hair. 
“Fuzzies.�� You mumbled and let them fall to the ground to be swept up later. Your eyes lit up and a smile spread across your face as you unraveled yourself from Josh. 
“Wait! I have an idea! Can you move the microwave to the kitchen table and stay put, please? I’ll be right back!” You spoke quickly as you made your way to the bathroom and began to collect his shampoo and conditioner off of the edge of the tub. 
Josh stood in the middle of the kitchen with his arms crossed over his chest and a brow raised as he watched you open the linen closet right outside the break in the kitchen wall and pull out two soft, fluffy towels. His eyes never left you as you made your way back into the kitchen and folded one of the towels, placing it on the edge of the sink. 
“What are you doing, Sunny girl?” Josh mumbled as he turned on his heel and he followed you with his gaze, watching as you pulled a TV tray out from its storage spot and opened it, placing it at the end of the kitchen counter. You shot a silly smile in his direction and walked up to him, lifting up onto you toes to press a soft kiss to his lips. 
“Too many fuzzies.” You mumbled and reached up to pick another piece of basement fuzz out from between his curls. A soft smile spread across Josh’s face as realization washed over him and he slowly made his way over to the counter, waiting for your next direction. 
“Bum, hmm… here, feet here and neck here.” You spoke and pointed out each key point on the counter and TV tray where his feet would find a home for the next forty five minutes. Josh couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face, and the deep sigh that escaped his chest as he did what he was told and hopped up onto the countertop. 
“You are aware I’m a bit too big for this, right?” He mumbled and laid back, gently placing his neck against the towel rest you had so lovingly laid out. Reaching up you placed a finger against your lips and shushed him before reaching out and beginning to run your fingers gently though his tangled mess of hair. Josh let his eyes flutter shut and got lost in the feeling of your finger tips against his scalp, knowing full well he couldn’t tell you no. 
You leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the tip of his nose, giggling as he scrunched it up at the sudden sensation of you lips against his skin. Josh reached out and wrapped his hand around yours, squeezing it gently. 
“You can’t tell me you’re too big for this, you fit right where you need to now, shhh so I can pamper you!” You giggles and couldn’t help but place your free hand against his cheek. He couldn’t help but roll his eyes as you spoke and let his body relax against the counter top. 
You wasted no time in turning on the faucet and regulating the temperature of the water, making sure it wasn’t too hot for his sensitive scalp. A soft groan escaped his lips as the warm water saturated his hair and began to soothe his scalp. 
“Did you guys get a lot done today?” You asked softly, reaching over to grab the bottle of shampoo and placed a bit in your palm. Josh shrugged his shoulders and readjusted the way his feet were placed, crossing them at the ankles. 
“We found a lot of old report cards and projects we did for school. Mom is a sentimental pack rat after all. Sam threw it all in the dumpster when she wasn’t looking.” A shiver danced down his spine as you began to run your fingers through his damp hair, lathering the shampoo through the strands. 
“Oh! And remember that bathing suit we thought you lost somewhere between here and LA? Yeah it was in moms car apparently, it’s been in my childhood bedroom since last summer.” He chuckled softly and let his eyes flutter shut as you began to massage the tips of your fingers against his scalp.  
You paid close attention to the back of his head where the hair often became entangled in his chains and pulled, causing a sore spot to form. Lifting his head gently, you snuck your arm underneath his neck to better massage the back of his head. 
“She decided I didn’t need that bikini, not that she liked it on me anyway. She hid it on purpose.” 
Turning the faucet back on, you rinsed your hands under the warm water before turning on the sprayer function and pulled the handle out of its resting place. A soft smile tugged at the corners of Joshs lips as you held the sprayer just above his hair line and began to rinse all of the shampoo out of his hair. 
“Sam asked where you were today, why you didn’t tag along. Sometimes I wonder if he’s more attached to you than I am.” Josh chuckled and reached up, wiping away a stream of water that ran down his forehead. 
“He just likes that I’ll get down on the floor and play cars with him.” The metaphor one that slipped past your lips frequently in terms of your relationship with Sam. Josh rolled his eyes as he tilted his head in the direction you silently requested. 
It didn’t take long to get all of the shampoo out of his short locks and you made quick work of squeezing out any excess water that was left behind. He quickly shifted the way he was laying, stretching his legs out straight and lifted his back up off of the counter. A deep sigh slipped past his lips and he crossed his at the knee legs, kicking his foot to the rhythm in his head. 
“What’d you do that for? Now you’ve gotta suffer without a footrest.” You giggle and reached over for the conditioner, making sure you put enough in your hand for his hair. 
“You’re not gonna pick it up for me?” He pushed his bottom lip out in a pout, playing the sadness card to what he thought was his advantage. Another giggle slipped past your lips and you shook your head, holding your conditioner covered hands up so he could see. 
“Not with conditioner hands, once I get this in your hair I will, deal?” You cooed, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the dampened skin of his forehead. Josh leaned up and reached around with his free hand, cupping the back of your head and pulled your face down to his. He captured your lips with his in a sweet kiss before letting you go and rested his neck back against the towel. 
“Thank you.” He mumbled and let his eyes flutter shut as you began to work the conditioner into his curls. A soft yawn escaped him as you began to massage the sides of his head, the prickling of the hair that’s starting to grow in scratching gently at your finger tips. 
“Mom said we can have dinner there next Saturday if you wanted to. Just us, her and pops, they miss you.” Nodding your head you reached up and trickled the water, rinsing the conditioner off of your fingers. 
“Just us four huh? I think that sounds like a date. As much as I love your brothers they can get to be a bit much.” You giggled and began to run your fingertips gently over his face, something he fully enjoyed. Running your finger down the curve of his nose you tapped the tip of it gently before letting your hand fall lower and traced his Cupids bow. 
“They can’t make it, something about a kayaking trip? I don’t know, mom was a little upset.” You couldn’t help the way you shrugged your shoulders and leaned down to press a soft kiss to his lips. 
“We should go kayaking with them one day, that could be fun.”  You thought aloud and went through the motions of rinsing the conditioner out of his hair. Josh began to bang his heels against the side of the counter, reminding you that you hadn’t picked up his foot rest.
With one more deep rinse of his locks you turned off the water and gently wrung out his hair. A soft tap to his shoulder was all he needed to lift up just enough for you to pull the towel out from underneath him. A soft sigh escaped him as you gently dried and fluffed his hair and guided him to sit up where he was. Reaching up you began to finger curl the ringlets that fell over his forehead, making sure they were uniform with each other. 
“Let’s be crazy and let it dry as is so I don’t have to wash it again before bed.” Josh chuckled as you stopped in your tracks and turned on your heel. 
“No product, hmm? Does that mean I get to play with your curls as much as I want?” Josh nodded and reached out, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulled you as close to him as he could. A soft smile spread across your face and you reached up, beginning to play with every strand of hair you could. 
“Thank you for this, Sunny girl, it was exactly what I needed.” He cooed and pressed soft kisses to your cheek. You beamed up at him and wrapped your arms tightly around his neck. 
“Anytime, lover boy.” You spoke softly and pressed up onto your toes, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. 
Taglist: @vanfleeter @joshsindigostreak @wideminded-dreamer @gracev0609 @lipstickitty @runwayblues @stardustvanfleet
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joshfuckingkiszka · 5 months ago
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『era two』
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jmk x f!reader
sowwy guys hope it's good enough to make up for my sins
THIS SERIES IS 18+ MINORS DNI
chapter warnings: SMUT, josh is so cute, confrontation, unprotected sex (you all know what to do), god i love fluffy joshy
Before you knew it, life moved on, you settled into the ebb and flow of a normal college routine. All of sudden, you were a senior, then walking the stage at graduation, and suddenly working a “big girl” job, where you went out for drinks with coworkers on Friday nights. 
You never got too drunk, seeing as you no longer wished to spend Saturdays in bed, hungover. When you saw a familiar, but not the same, head of curls, you thought you were plastered.
It wasn’t until Danny and Sam approached you that you realized just how sober you were. They slid in on both sides of your now empty booth, and traced your eyes to your dancing coworkers. 
Then you hoped they didn’t notice the alarms going off inside you when one of them approached Josh, a flirtatious smile on her beautifully made up face. She pointed over at your table, presumably trying to show the friends she came with. Upon his eyes noticing his brother’s hand high in the air, and then subsequently your face, you felt hot, almost embarrassed. 
Why should you be embarrassed, though? Your situationship with Josh was just that. You certainly hadn’t owed him anything when you fell in love, breaking the unspoken contract you had created. 
When your eyes refocused, Josh was no longer with your friend, and you noticed him weaving through the thick crowd to get to you. 
“Oh fuck, oh fuck,” you found yourself repeating in various stages of distress. Danny and Sam were confused, as no one else knew about what you and Josh previously had, you were just a friend of the group - including Josh’s identical twin - who all of a sudden stopped showing up to invites. 
“Well, if it isn’t a picture of a memory,” Josh spoke, and you noticed that his voice held no anger. 
“Maybe you can get her to explain herself.” You playfully elbowed Sam. A look Josh gave the two told them to leave, and Josh took Danny’s spot beside you. 
“Hey,” you settled on. 
“You ghosted me.” Okay, straight to the point.
“I did.” Good, noncommittal. 
“Do you think I deserve an explanation?” Fair. 
“I don’t know. Do you?” Fairer. 
“Yes.” Damn. 
“Okay. You wanted to fuck. That’s why I ghosted you.” You took a sip of your empty drink, but he could barely hear the ice over the music. Led Zeppelin, you think it is. You bet that Josh would know, he was so good with old music. Jake was slightly better, but you would never say that out loud. 
“I-I thought that’s what you wanted. Was it not?” The fear in his voice worried you. 
“Yes!” you said quickly, like you were terrified of disappointing him. Maybe you were. “It was. Well, at first.” 
“Care to elaborate?” He threw his arm around you, and it made a noise as it hit the vinyl of the seat. It was nicely toned now, he had been rather lanky by your memory. His hands had changed too, though you weren’t sure how. 
“I was okay with our…situation at first. I was always stressed with class and you were a great stress relief. But, you kept inviting me out, with your friends. You kept holding my hand in public, buying me food, and singing in my shower.” 
“Okay. Should I not have been your friend?” He asked earnestly. 
“But we weren’t friends, Josh. I fell in love with you, but you wanted to fuck, so I ghosted you. It was immature and I could have handled it better, but I don’t regret it and I will not apologize for putting me first,” You explained, and you couldn’t find it to meet his gaze.
“You’re right, you could have handled it better. Never once did I say that a relationship was off the table, but I understand your thought. Had you told me, I would’ve told you that I was in love with you too.” 
His fingers caressed your jaw, bringing you to finally look at him. His eyes held a new weight in them, but looked no different than they had before. That beautiful mahogany color still darkly colored his iris. His lips were exactly as you remembered them, soft and flavored grapefruit by his favorite drink. 
He let you catch your breath for a minute, and ordered you another drink. 
Then he asked, “How have you been?” 
“Good, working a boring job, living with my parents, surviving Michigan winters. You?” 
He looked down then back at you. “We’re still in the band, and it’s doing…really well. We signed to a record label and actually just got back from a tour.” 
“Wow. Any Grammys?” 
“Uh, yeah. Strangely enough.” Wow. You had been joking when you asked but the uncharacteristically serious look in his eyes told you he wasn’t. 
“Oh. Didn’t realize I was sitting next to a world famous rockstar,” you lamented jokingly, bowing your head at him, “Does that mean you’re rich enough to buy the next round?” 
His cheeks burned that shade of scarlet you had missed so much and you were immediately compelled to tell him you were joking. 
“I know, mama,” God, after all this time. The effect that nickname still had on you was absolutely detrimental. “I’m actually probably rich enough to take you on a real date. If you’re up for it, that is.”
You wanted to yell that of course you were up for it! That you had waited years in solitude for those words to slip from those beautiful lips! 
But you managed a simple, “I would love that, Joshy.” 
Your first date with Josh Kiszka was, in simple terms, a disaster. He had lost track of time and picked you up an hour and a half late, but that was okay because you had just finished getting ready as he arrived at your door, a work project taking a bit more time than anticipated. Traffic had been terrible on the way to whatever surprise location he had in store for you, but it worked out as it allowed him time to show the music Greta Van Fleet had been putting out in your absence. You decided that “You’re the One” was your favorite, but that they were all beautiful and telling of who they were and had become. 
When you thought nothing else could go wrong, your reservation wasn’t held, not that you could blame them, and you were forced to find another dinner location. During rush hour. On a Friday. Every other restaurant within a 50 mile radius would have at least an hour wait time, so Josh decided to take it upon himself and grab takeout form what he claimed was “the best Chinese place ever” and the two of you sat in the park, eating crab rangoons and reminiscing about your glory days. 
“You thought I was ghosting you?!” He laughed, but as he contemplated why you would think that, it hit him. “Oh my God, I am so stupid! I would open your texts, forget to respond, think that I had responded and get upset that you hadn’t! Then, of course, I would go back to the messages, see I never actually texted you, and hope you wouldn’t be upset.” 
“I don’t know that I ever truly was,” you claimed, “I mean, I didn’t love feeling ignored, but whenever you would finally text me, it was like nothing had happened - a clean slate. Eventually, I got to the point where I needed something I felt like you couldn’t give me, and I knew it had to end.” 
His face had fallen, and you immediately scrambled to defend him. 
“Don’t, mama, I don’t want you to pretend like you’re okay with what I did to you. I’m not okay with what I did to you. But, if you’ll let me, I promise to try and make it up to you.” 
How could you deny those puppy dog eyes? 
Josh was serious about making it up to you. He randomly brought you flowers of differing varieties, trying to identify your favorite without being told. His kitchen was a regular space of brownies and cookies, trying different recipes he would find on Pinterest. Your date nights were compilations of various cute TikToks you both had seen. 
As you sat at his dining room table, acrylic paint in a variety of colors spread between the two of you, you couldn’t hold back giggles as you dramatically portrayed his features. He couldn’t help but do the same. As you showed each other your - frankly, horrible - portraits of each other, tears streamed down your faces and your stomachs hurt from the laughter. 
Once the two of you settled down, you moved to clean up the mess the two of you - but mostly Josh - made. Setting the small easels that held your artwork to the side so you could clean the table, you bent slightly at the waist to get one tough spot of brown paint. Suddenly, a pair of large hands were on your hips, and a pair of lips were tickling your neck. 
“Josh,” you groaned, “I’m trying to clean your mess!” 
“We’ll do it later,” he said matter-of-factly, trying to persuade you. Would it be wrong to say it was working? 
“No, you won’t. It’ll dry and,” you shuddered as his lips loosely trailed down your neck, “n-never come o-out. Stop!” You didn’t want him to stop and, based on the smirk you could feel on your shoulder, he knew that. 
His hands moved lower, gripping at the supple flesh of your ass. “I’ll buy a new table,” he spoke against the very top of your spine.
“W-why would you d-do that when I can just clean i-it?” His hands had moved around to the front of your body, his fingers slipping just beyond the waistband of your jeans. 
“Because I’ve got some other interests I’d like to take care of right now,” he spoke as he popped the button on your jeans. 
His fingers stayed on the outside of your underwear, lacy and begging to be pulled off, but trailed down your mons, nonetheless. 
“Still wanna clean?” His fingers hovered over where he knew your clit was, and you felt like testing him. 
“Yes.” It was stern. He shrugged and pressed the pad of his finger into your clit, over your underwear, and you fought to hold back your back. 
Josh moved his finger so slowly that you almost felt like crying. 
“Well,” you looked at him, expectantly, “clean, mama. Don’t wanna see a single fucking spot on this table.” You could feel spit on your ear from his speaking through gritted teeth. 
With how slow he was going, you figured you could easily clean at the same time. That said, you were trying to ignore just how wet you were getting. 
You leaned over - and he followed - as you wiped the table. You could be wrong, but it felt like he was…speeding up? You ignored it, trying to focus on the paint on the table. No, he was definitely increasing the speed of his finger. 
Biting your lip, you paused cleaning to let out a small moan. As soon as you did, his finger returned to its original snail pace. You whined at him. 
“Only good girls get to cum, don’t forget that.” He held your jaw in his hand as he spoke to you.  Looking over your face for any signs of discomfort, and not seeing any, he kissed you deeply. 
“C’mon, mama, you wanted to clean so badly, do it.” His finger slid inside your panties, and the hand that wasn’t occupied with a sponge was white-knuckling the table. 
“Josh,” you whined out his name, and all of a sudden he didn’t care about upholding you to cleaning. 
One of his arms swept anything that remained on the table to the floor, and the other turned you around. His body pushed yours to meet the wooden surface as he kissed you passionately. Your hands roamed his chest under his shirt, warm and golden from the sun. He pulled away only for a second to remove your barrier, and you smiled at him as thanks. Your nails lightly scraped at his pecs, and he groaned at the feeling. Moving your hands down, you pulled at his belt harshly until it eventually came off. He giggled into your mouth, and you followed suit. 
He pushed your shirt up lazily, not even bothering to take off your bra either. Simply pulling down the cup, he took your nipple in his mouth. You moaned into his mouth, reaching your hand into his boxers. In return, his hands inadvertently tickled down your sides until he returned to your waistband. His mouth never leaving your chest, he managed to pull down your pants and underwear to your ankles. Josh’s pointer and middle finger joined forces to gently toy with your clit until you were whining for much more. 
Deep brown eyes bore into yours as his lips trailed down your stomach and then began an assault on your bundle of nerves. Your hands instinctively went for his hair, unruly and so so curly. Your thighs wrapped around his head and he smiled into your cunt. His tongue created unknown patterns around your clit, occasionally switching to fuck you with it. When you came, you swore you were seeing stars. 
You moved down to return the favor, but he pinned you back with his body, holding your hands captive above your head with one of his hands. The other hand moved to just barely reveal his cock to you. Before you could say anything about how badly you needed it in your mouth, he was ever-so-gently sliding into you. In tandem, you let out loud moans, thankful Jake wasn’t home. 
Thrusting slowly at first, he slowly built up to a nice pace. One that had him hitting that spot inside of you each time, and making you slightly gasp for air. Meanwhile, his gaze was transfixed on watching it slide in and out of you. Lips parted slightly, and wet from his tongue darting out to moisten them, he let out small pants.
When you began to moan his name, your arousal visible on the base of his cock, he sped up more, his gaze meeting yours. He leaned down to kiss you, and you were suddenly aware of how much sweat the two of you had produced. He was sticky with it but you couldn’t care less as you wrapped your body around his. This unknowingly allowed him to reach a much deeper spot inside you and you both moaned when you felt it. Again, he sped up and his jaw clenched as he tried not to cum before you. He brought one of his hands to your face, gently goading you to suck on two of his fingers. Once he was satisfied, he brought those fingers between your bodies, making quick circles on your clit. This quickly brought you to the edge. 
“C’mon, mama, cum for me.” And that sent you right over. 
“Want you to cum for me, Joshy. Wanna make a mess on me? Hm? Get me all dirty?” You whispered the last word in his ear, and he groaned as he pulled out and spilled on your stomach. 
That goofy smile returned, and then he was off to grab something to clean you up. After his cum was wiped off of your belly, he gently moved you to stand, searching your body for any signs of bruising or discomfort. Then, he was picking you up, bringing you to the bathroom where he filled up the tub with warm water and epsom salts so you wouldn’t be as sore. 
“Joshy?” You spoke as he turned to leave the bathroom.
“Hm?” 
“Will you…get in with me?” 
“‘Fcourse, mama, anything for you.”
〚taglist〛
gvf: @doodle417​ , @brokenbellz​, @gretavanfleas​, @pyrojoshy​, @greta-van-chaos​, @xserenax-13​, @hayley1623​, @kdarling1​, @autumns30, @keighoe, @chalametpwk​, @sammysvanfeet​, @shawnsthighs​, @gretavanbitches​, @sammiejane22​, @gretavanbestie, @jordierama​, @alexxavicry​
josh: @prophetofthedune​, @loofypoofy, @gretavangrace​
this series: @gvfpal
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devilat-thedoor · 4 months ago
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What Is and What Should Never Be Ch 7. pt1
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A/N: to everyone who’s waited patiently while i got my shit together and found my motivation, i appreciate you and i hope you’re still with me🩵 the support i’ve received on this story means more than i could ever explain… but things are about to get a little rocky. i love you🫶🏽
Word Count: 9.1k
Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, Smut(Unprotected Shower sex, Overstimulation[very briefly], Oral[m rec]), Minor Arguing/Fighting, Alcohol Consumption, Mentions of Death(loss of a parent/parents). If i missed anything, please let me know!
If there was anyone to ever get through this life with their heart still intact, they didn’t do it right.
“Hmm…stop…” You giggled sleepily at the feeling of Jake’s fingers sliding beneath your shirt to poke at your ribs. “Jake, I’m sleeping.”
“Doesn’t sound like you’re sleeping, peach…” His head was on your chest, his legs tangled with your own, “Hey.��
You lifted your head and opened your eyes to find him looking up at you. “Hey.” Giving him a soft smile, you reached to push the hair from his face.
“Good morning, beautiful.” Jake grasped your side and rolled over to pull you on top of him, wrapping his arms around you tightly. “Let’s do something today.” He was studying your face as though he were memorizing every detail. Picking his head up, he pressed his lips to yours for a brief moment. “Anything you want, peach… I just wanna spend all day with you.”
After stealing another kiss from him, you sat up to straddle his waist. “Wait- You’re supposed to open today… What time is it?” When you leaned over to grab your phone from the nightstand, he squeezed his arms around you and flipped you, pinning you down with his body. “Jake!” You squealed, wrapping your legs around his waist, “You’re gonna be late…” You warned, but the way your hands held onto his back made it clear that you didn’t want him to move.
He was kissing along your jaw, smirking at the way your breath caught in your throat. “I called Charlie last night… He’s covering my shift.” He left no room for you to question as he continued spoiling your skin with warm kisses. “So what do you wanna do?”
“Hmm…probably shower first…”
“Shower?” His teeth grazed your collarbone and he chuckled at the gasp that escaped you. “Okay, we can shower… Then what?” He took it upon himself to grasp the hem of your shirt, rising from your body enough to pull the shirt over your head.
You lifted from the mattress as he did so, flopping back down with a giggle. “Umm… Then coffee and breakfast?”
“Done and done.” Jake resumed his position on top of you. “What’s after breakfast, peach?” He latched his mouth onto your breast, sucking at the supple skin.
“Then maybe we c- shit…” Your back arched as he dragged his tongue over your nipple, forcing the skin to pebble. Your mind was swirling at the feeling of his mouth and his hands on you, though you couldn’t help but acknowledge the elephant in the room. “Then… Maybe we talk about last night?”
He froze for a moment before laying his forehead on your chest, releasing a defeated sigh as he replied quietly, “There’s nothing left to talk about, Y/N.” Silence hung between the two of you until he finally lifted his face. It was evident from the look he was giving you that he didn’t want to have another conversation regarding his ex.
Cupping his cheeks, you gave him a sympathetic smile. “I don’t just mean that.” You began to slide out from beneath, pulling yourself into a sitting position, and he followed suit. You rubbed your hands over your face as he raised an eyebrow at you in question. “Jake, do you trust me?” When he began to roll his eyes, you pulled the blanket up to cover your bare chest. “Don’t do that, just-...” You had to laugh a little as he eyed you with annoyance. “Despite the way that you flirt with Olivia and constantly favor her over me, I still trust you.” Slowly, you moved towards him, letting the blanket fall away as you climbed into his lap, “Baby… I just need to know that you believe me when I say that I’m yours. I don’t want Josh- I don’t want anybody that isn’t you.” Pressing a soft kiss to his lips, you felt his body relax.
“I know- I believe you.” His hands begin to roam your body again, skimming your thighs and the length of your spine. “I’m gonna be better, peach, I swear… I’m gonna try.” He held your gaze, his brown eyes soft and vulnerable, and you began to melt into him. “Please tell me that’s enough…”
You nodded your head, twisting your fingers through his soft hair, “It is… It’s more than enough.” Your gentle reassurance brought a small smile to his face and he moved in for another kiss but you jumped up from the bed before he could connect his lips to yours. “What?” You asked when he held his hands out in confusion.
“We were in the middle of something… Come back here.” He was almost whining, though he’d deny that if you called him out on it. Jake crawled to the edge of the bed and reached for your hand, trying to pull you back into the sea of sheets to get lost with him.
Grasping his face in your free hand, you squished his cheeks, forcing his lips to pucker. You couldn’t help but giggle at his annoyed expression as you pecked him one last time before turning away from him, “Shower first, remember?...... Then coffee and breakfast.” Pulling your robe from the back of your bedroom door, you shrugged it on and tied it to cover yourself before slipping out of your room and going to the bathroom. After turning the water on, you took the chance to brush your teeth while it warmed up. As you removed the robe, ready to step into the steaming hot shower, the door opened.
Jake greeted your look of question with a grin as he stripped out of his boxers without an ounce of bashfulness. “What? I need a shower too… Thought we could conserve water.” He shrugged his shoulders and pulled the curtain back, watching the way you hungrily eyed him. “We don’t have all day, peach. We’re getting dangerously close to missing breakfast…”
Chewing on your lip, you finally slid the old, tattered boxers down your legs and moved by him to step in the tub, “I suppose that is the most important meal of the day.” Once you were beneath the stream, he stepped in behind you and closed the curtain. “Hey!” Just as you tilted your head back to wet your hair, Jake had yanked you out of the way and took your place.
“Can I have the shampoo, peach?” He reached blindly as the water cascaded down and around his face.
Your gaze traveled over his body, “Mhmm…” Squeezing a bit of the product into your own hand, you stepped closer and rubbed your palms together to create a lather. Once you were close enough that he could feel the heat coming off of your body, he peeked one eye open just in time to see you reaching up to scrub the suds into his scalp. His hands fell to your waist and he pulled you against him as a groan vibrated from his chest and rattled against your own. “You have really great hair, y’know…”
Jake leaned his head into your touch, his smile growing mischievous, “I know, baby… But you-” He paused, his hands sliding down your back and over your ass, “-have a really great ass…”
An involuntary moan escaped your mouth as he squeezed the flesh and leaned forward to kiss you. “Aht! We gotta rinse, Jake… Then condition.” Tugging on his hair, you forced his head back under the shower and worked the soap out of his strands. He remained patient through the process and allowed you to apply the conditioner and rinse it before moving out of the way so you could wash your own hair.
As you finished raking the conditioner through your locks, he pressed himself against your back and brought his hands around to cup your breasts, “You know how tortuous it is, peach… To watch the way your body moves while you do the most mundane of tasks…” His voice was a husky whisper in your ear.
“Is that why your dick is poking my asscheek right now?” You looked over your shoulder at him and reached back to grasp his hardening length, smirking at the sharp intake of breath he took.
He bucked into your hand as his mouth latched onto your neck, kissing and sucking, his tongue dragging across your wet skin, “I swear to god, if I don’t get to fuck you before we leave this apartment… I might die, peach.”
“I think you’re being dramatic.” You tightened your grip on him and began to stroke his cock, the remnants of conditioner making your hand slip over him with no resistance. “I’ll give you five minutes to make me cum…”
He pulled his mouth away from you with a scoff, “Five minutes? Why only five?”
“Because I have to rinse the conditioner out of my hair in five minutes…” You began to slow your hand to a stop, “If you don’t think you can do it then just say that, Jake.”
He released a growl and grabbed your wrist to pull your hand off of him. Within seconds, he had both of your hands and your chest pressed against the shower wall, “Keep your hands here and your smart mouth shut.” Jake grasped your hips then, pulling them back slightly while you remained still, and before you knew it, he was buried completely inside of you. “Fuuuuck… I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the feeling of you.” He drew himself out of you and straight back in, setting a surprisingly slow pace. Goosebumps scattered across your skin at the feeling of his hot breath on your neck and despite the relaxed, lazy strokes he was giving, you still fought to keep your moans locked in. He was watching your face, the way you bit your lips together and squeezed your eyes shut, “How many minutes do I have left, baby? About three, would you say?” There was a hint of amusement in his words like he was mocking you.
“Yes… Three.” You replied through gritted teeth, annoyed that your orgasm was already beginning to build.
His right hand slithered from your hip to find your clit as he began to flick and tease the bud beneath his fingers, “I can feel it, peach… You’re already close, aren’t you?” A short laugh escaped him as the whimpers you’d been holding started to cascade from your lips, “What’s the matter, hmm? You didn’t think I could do it?” If there was one thing about Jake, it’s that he would never pass up the opportunity to gloat.
It was all winding too fast for you to stop it and it was mostly thanks to his skilled fingers, rolling over your clit at an eye rolling speed. “J-Jake… Please… I’m gonna- I- shit…” Your body was moving on its own, rocking back to meet his thrusts, and your legs started to wobble. “Oh god… Oh…god!” You cried out, your climax washing over you in such a hot rush that it made the water feel icy. Jake held you up as he slid his length out of you and a shiver swept over your skin.
“I think I still have a minute to spare.” He was always so arrogant, cocky. You stepped out of his hold and sank to your knees, wasting no time in sucking him into your mouth. “There you go, baby- fuck… Do you know how pretty you look with my cock in your mouth? So fucking pretty…” The water was raining down over your head, streaming down your face, and he carefully combed his fingers through your hair to move it out of your face. You swirled your tongue around the tip holding eye contact with him. “C’mon, peach. Don’t you fucking tease.”
You let him fall from your mouth, your hand picking up the slack, and gazed up at him through your lashes, “I’m not teasing, baby… I’m savoring.” You gave him one long kitten lick, accompanied by a satisfied hum.
His head rolled back as he let out a needy groan, then he suddenly had a fistful of your hair as his head snapped back up and his jaw clenched tight. “You can savor all you want later, but the water is starting to get cold and my patience is wearing thin. Open.” His demanding and dominant voice alone could’ve brought you to a second orgasm if you weren’t so focused on giving him what he deserved. Taking your hand off of him, you opened your mouth wide and stuck your tongue out. Jake loosened his grip on your hair as he used his free hand to guide his cock to your mouth. You kept your eyes locked on his and closed your lips around him as he pushed further. “Use your tongue, baby.” He sounded desperate, his nails scratching at you scalp as he fucked into your mouth.
You obliged, waving your tongue along the underside of his cock, putting pressure on the large vein that decorated it. When an unexpected whimper tumbled from his mouth, you pulled yourself off of him, “Jake…baby, can you let me have control for a minute?” You gave him the best doe eyes you could manage.
He eyed you silently for a moment, but when you leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his shaft while maintaining eye contact, he relinquished and gave you a single nod, releasing your hair. “Don’t play games, Y/N. If you- oh fuck…” You didn’t give him time to finish his threat as you took him back into your mouth, bobbing your head and stroking him simultaneously. The grunts leaving his throat told you that he was enjoying it but you took it step further, removing your hand completely to grasp the back of his thighs and swallow him all the way down. “Jesus christ, peach. I-...” He trailed off as your throat pulsed and squeezed around his tip. The hot water had officially gone cold and you could feel Jake shiver beneath your fingertips. He was muttering under his breath, nothing of coherence, and you knew he was there, he just needed a final push. As you resumed bobbing your head again, you began to massage his balls and that was more than enough. Jake desperately grasped at the back of your head as he came. An abundance of curses and praises rained over you with the water as he emptied himself onto your tongue. “Peach…” It was a warning to tell you that he was finished but you continued to blow him, hollowing your cheeks while you innocently gazed up at him. He was trying to pull you off of him by your hair, his brows pinched tightly, “Y/N…” He was beginning to tremble, his knees getting weaker and threatening to buckle but you wouldn’t let up. He was starting to whimper and whine, an unfamiliar vulnerability creeping over him, “P-please… I can’t- you gotta st-... I can’t take it, peach.” His pleas were wearing on you and you were about to stop when he was overcome by a second climax.
You eased him through it as gently as you could, rubbing your palm up and down his thigh in a soothing manner. Jake was panting, holding onto the shower wall to keep himself upright, when you spun around to shut the water off and stand up. “Are you okay, baby?” Stepping towards him cautiously, you wrapped your arms around his midsection and placed a soft kiss to the center of his chest.
He looked down at you through heavy lidded eyes and for a second you thought he was going to be mad at you. “I’ve never felt anything like that. What the fuck did you do to me?” He was still a bit breathless as he wrapped his arms around you, and kissed your temple.
You giggled softly, looking up at him, “Would you trust me enough to let me do it again?” Yanking the curtain open, you broke away from Jake to step out and grab your towel, “Overstimulation can lead to a more heightened sense of euphoria because it borders the line between pain and pleasure…” You shrugged as you tossed a towel at him and watched him pat his skin dry before securing it around his waist all while trying to hide his smirk. “You liked it, didn’t you?”
He cut his eyes to you, seeing your own grin, “No… Kiss your little power trip goodbye, peach.” He walked by you and pulled the bathroom door open to usher you out. “I do appreciate that lesson in overstimulation, though…” As you passed through the doorway, he reeled his hand back and left a sharp smack to your ass, causing you to yelp, “It’ll come in handy later.”
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Summer had breezed by in a flash and aside from the solid tan you got, the only thing that changed between the start of the season and the end, was how much your feelings for Jake had grown. Maybe it was falling asleep and waking up tangled together… Or maybe the countless dates; some spent curled up on his couch with a glass of wine and a new takeout menu while the two of you tried to agree on a new documentary to watch. Other times, you’d find yourselves at some hole-in-the-wall bar that nobody’s ever heard of, but leave it to Jake to sniff out a place with live music. Thinking back on your first day of work at Highway Tunes, you never would’ve expected to still be here, let alone sitting in the passenger seat of Jake’s car as he held your hand over the shifter, driving you to work.
“I’ll be back to get you at closing, yeah?” He pulled into his usual spot in the back lot and shifted the car into park, finally releasing your hand.
You grabbed your bag from the floor and dug through it to make sure you had everything you could possibly need for your shift, “No…” Turning to look at your boyfriend, you smiled and leaned over the console to kiss his cheek before grasping the door handle.
“What do you mean ‘no’? What-.”
Gently placing your hand on his thigh, you waited for him to stop talking. “You and Josh promised Sam that you’d go on that hike with him tomorrow so he could get pictures for his portfolio. He’s going to have you both up before sunrise and I don’t want any part of that if I’m working the double tomorrow.” You watched as he started to pout, biting back your giggles. “You’ll live, Jake. It’s one night without me… Besides, I’ve barely seen Bell at all the past few weeks and we’re gonna have a movie night.”
He grasped your hand before you could pull it away from him, “What if I don’t live, Y/N?” He was leaning in closer to you as he spoke, “What if I bury my face in your pillow and suffocate?... Or what if a bug crawls into my mouth and I choke and you’re not there to save me? Do you really want that on your conscience, peach?”
The tip of his nose poked yours and you rolled your eyes at him, “You’re ridiculous… And you’re not gonna change my mind. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You left him with a soft, lingering peck and pushed the car door open to step out. In true Jake fashion, he waited until you were through the back door of the store before he drove off.
“Hey! Y/N, I’m glad you’re here. I want- shit…hang on…” Josh was struggling to untangle himself from a mess of christmas lights and cords when you came out of the back hallway.
He gave up and remained seated on the floor, trying to unknot the mess around him as you approached, “Josh… Honey, what are you doing?” You dropped your bag and kneeled beside him to examine the varying array of wires, “Christmas is like, four months away.” Out of habit, you immediately began to help him, pulling the string lights apart. 
Josh watched you quietly, a smile ghosting over his lips at the way your brows scrunched in concentration. “You’re always diving in to save me, sweetheart…” He whispered it so softly, it was like he didn’t want you to hear it. “We uhh… We do this end of summer event every year.”
“An event?” You lifted your head to look at him just as you pulled a knot free.
“Yeah… So we set up a big tent in the back parking lot and have a few local bands play some music. We charge fifty bucks for front door entry and that gives the customers access to the live music out back and we always have a ton of food and drinks. But it’s also an automatic entry into a giveaway we do.” He managed to get one of the light bundles free and wrapped it neatly to set aside.
You raised an eyebrow at him, “Fifty bucks? People pay that?” You couldn’t hide your shock at the cover price.
Josh chuckled as he yanked at the wires, “It seems steep, I know… See, all the money goes to a good cause and the community loves to offer support.” He twisted his body, reaching into a box behind him to grab a piece of paper and pass it to you. “This is last year’s flyer… We open around 1pm, people pay the cover and they can browse as usual if they want or they can just head straight out back for the music and food.” He was hyper-focused on a specific knot and you couldn’t take your eyes off his hands, his fingers. The way the veins protruded and flexed beneath his skin as he pulled more lights away from the tangles. “But the money is-... My eyes are up here, babe…” He had a giant, teasing grin when you cast your eyes to his face and you were sure your face was bright red, but he just laughed it off and continued, “All the money we collect from the entry fee goes to a non-profit organization. We try to donate to a different one every year but it’s almost always one that gives young kids the opportunity to learn about music or instruments, y’know?”
You finally managed to pull a strand of lights and an extension cord free at the same time, “Is this another tradition that your parents started?” After neatly wrapping the wires, you set them aside and put your attention back on the curly haired boy.
“No, actually. Jakey and I tried to convince them to do it a few times but they thought- well, with the money that would have to be put into everything to make it all happen, they didn’t think it was worth the risk.” A look of pride arose on his face with a soft smile, “We both saved a lot of our own money from working here and when mom and dad finally passed it down to us… It wasn’t even a conversation that needed to be had, we knew that we wanted to do it so we made it happen.” He dropped the knots he was working on and started to stand up, “C’mere.” He took your hand and helped you up from the floor before leading you to the office. You let your hand remain clasped with his until he released it to pull something from the shelf behind the desk. “This is from our first year.”  It was a small photo album. Josh laid it on the desk and ushered you into the chair.
Taking a seat, you looked down at the leather cover and ran your fingers down the edge before flipping it open. “Oh my god… Is this you and Jake?” The very first picture in the album was the twins, standing outside of the store. They both looked so young, baby-faced, and a lot different than how you knew them. The sight of Josh without his facial hair made it so much more obvious that he and Jake were completely identical. “Your hair, Josh… You look-.” You paused, clamping your mouth shut.
“Sexy? I know… All the ladies and the gents wanted me.” He was half joking but still gave you a smug smirk.
“I was gonna say you looked like a douchebag but I suppose if you felt sexy…” You chuckled at the scoff he let out and glanced up at him, “Oh, you know I’m joking. You were very sexy, boss. The faded sides suit you, but I like your fluffy curls now better… for the record.” Dropping your eyes back to the album, you flipped the page to find more photos from that same day. Sam was in a few of them along with another boy that you’d never seen before. “Bell would get a kick out of these. Sam was just a baby, oh god. You were all so young.” You studied Jake in all of the pictures. There was something different about him that you couldn’t quite place your finger on so you moved your attention to the mystery boy. A handsome, tall, dark haired boy. “Who’s this? You guys never mentioned a fourth brother.”
Josh sat on the edge of the desk and crossed his arms over his chest, “That’s Daniel- Danny.” He was smiling down at the photos as he continued, “He’s Sammy’s best friend. We all grew up together. So yeah, I guess he is our brother. I’m surprised you haven’t met him yet, he’s been back from college all summer.” As though he was growing impatient, he reached down to turn the next page himself, “Those were from when Jake and I were fresh out of high school. Mom got excited with the camera and spent the whole day taking pictures.” 
Silence fell upon the two of you as you flipped further in the album. You stopped at a picture of Jake, holding his middle finger up to flip the camera off, or maybe whoever was behind it. “Did Sam take these? They’re so good.” You’d gotten better at noticing his work with a camera. Between the way Bellamy gushed over his talent and the few times he’d been in the store or at Jake’s, showing off his photos, you’d grown to appreciate how talented he truly was.
“Yeah, actually. He kept insisting that we’d want to look back at the year our lives changed.” He put air quotes around the last part, “But we knew that he was only documenting to keep an eye on us for mom and dad… I guess I’m glad he did.” Josh slid off of the desk and crouched down beside you with excitement, placing a hand on your knee to keep himself balanced, “He made a photo album for Jake and I and a matching one for our parents- OH! Okay, these are from our first charity event!”
“Oh wow… This is so cool.” You’d never seen the store so full. There were dozens of people in the pictures, laughing, shopping, mingling. As you continued to flip, there were photos of a makeshift stage in the back parking lot, a band playing while people watched and cheered. Jake stood at a small, portable grill, flipping burgers with a genuine smile on his face. There was a girl standing close to him, watching him, her smile not quite as big as his but still present. As you continued turning the pages, her face was becoming more frequent in the photos, always close to Jake. You started to feel a sick, sinking feeling in your stomach as you scanned over her light brown hair and blue eyes. “Josh…” He looked up at you as you turned the page, his smile fading at your expression. “Who is this girl in all the p-...” Your voice faded off as your question was answered by the next page of pictures; Jake holding her hand, embracing her, kissing her.
“Shit… Umm, I should-.” Josh attempted to close the book but you flattened your palm against it to keep it open. “Y/N, I-... it’s nobody, just-.”
“It’s her. It’s Ivy, isn’t it?” You watched as he pulled the book away from you, waiting for a confirmation.
He released a sigh and closed it, standing up to place it back in its place on the shelf, “I forgot she was even in any of the pictures, that’s not why I was showing you them.” When he turned to face you again, he had a look on his face that you were beginning to grow accustomed to. “Y/N, look…just-.”
You cut him off, knowing exactly what he was about to say, “I won’t bring it up to him. It’ll stay between us…promise.” Standing up from the chair, you placed a hand on Josh’s arm to ease his stress. He held your gaze for a moment, his brown eyes nearly hypnotizing, and reached up to brush a strand of hair behind your ear. “Um- I should…do my job.” You pulled away from him and pointed towards the doorway before his fingers could make contact and made a swift exit.
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The shift stayed fairly busy and so did you, for the most part. You took care of the customers while Josh finished detangling the lights and cords and by 7:00, it had pretty much died off. The store was empty for the first time in hours and you finally had the chance to take a break. You finished putting away the stack of cassette tapes in your hand and went to grab your bottle of water from beneath the front counter. As you passed the office door, you stopped to do a double take, “Jake?” You pushed the door open further to see your boyfriend leaning over the desk, looking at the computer screen with his twin. “When did you-”
“Peach, come over here and give us your opinion.” He interrupted you, holding his hand out. Josh flicked his eyes to you briefly before setting them back on the screen. Jake’s impatience got the better of him, as it usually did, and he was coming across the small room to grab your hand and pull you to the opposite side of the desk. He planted you in front of him, a gentle grasp on your hip, as he pointed at the computer. “Which one do you like better?”
You looked back and forth between what you assumed were designs for this year’s flyers. There were two different options and you knew right away that each of the designs belonged to one of the twins. “No. Nuh uh. I’m not gonna be the deciding vote in this. Count me out.” You tried to break away but your boyfriend moved his hand from your hip and wrapped his arm around you, holding you against him.
Josh turned to you then, “Y/N, we’ve been arguing over this for days now. We need a tie breaker so we can get them printed.”
“Ask someone else to be the tie breaker!” You whined, trying to wiggle out of Jake’s hold.
The curly haired twin released a long, exhausted breath, “Come on, sweetheart… You’re the only one who’s opinion isn’t biased.”
“Yeah… Come on, sweetheart.” Jake mocked his brother with a smirk before resting his chin on your shoulder.
“How do you know I’m not biased?” You leaned forward, placing your palms flat on the desk to really examine both designs. They were both great and you could easily tell which belonged to who. Jake’s was set on a black background with a gold border and gold lettering. Elegant but not flashy. Josh’s was the opposite; bold and vibrant letters with a fun font. A border made up of vinyl records. “I like this one a lot.” You pointed to Jake’s first and he was ready to celebrate his triumph but you weren’t finished, “But… I think that this one is the better option.”
Your boyfriend dropped his hands from your body, “Of course you do…”
“Jake, don’t start. You wanted my opinion, I gave it… Don’t act like a child.”
“How is his better? It looks like a 1st grader made it.” He took a few steps back and leaned against the wall, “Why don’t you be honest and tell me why you really like my brother’s design better?”
Josh rolled his eyes, shaking his head a bit as he attempted to soothe the tension his twin was creating, “Jake, it’s not a big-”
“No, Josh.” You cut him off as you whipped around to address the long haired boy, “I never said that I liked his better, first of all. Let’s get that straight.” You were pointing your finger at him like a mother scolding her child as he stared at you, “Second of all, you wanted my opinion. My un-fucking-biased opinion. And that’s what you got. Both designs are great but Josh’s is more eye-catching and they’re going to be a hell of a lot cheaper to print… If you’re not worried about the money, then fuck it. Print both. I don’t give a shit. I need out of this goddamn room.” You wasted no time in leaving the office, only stopping to grab your phone from beneath the counter then walking to the back to step outside.
You propped the back door open and took a deep breath of the cool summer air, trying to force the tension out of your body. It had been lingering beneath your skin since you’d seen the photo album and you didn’t know why. Maybe it was how deep in love Jake looked in the pictures with her… Maybe that you’d never seen him look at you like that. You shook the thoughts away as best as you could, remembering that he still has a wall up around his heart and he’s really come a long way since you first met him.
“Peach.” He laughed as you jumped at his unexpected presence. “Baby, I’m sorry…”
You took a few steps away from him, “It’s fine, you just startled me.” You were staring at your phone screen, reading a text from Bellamy, when he closed the distance between you and plucked the phone from your hands.
He slid the device into his pocket, ignoring your grabbing hands and protests, “No. I’m sorry for acting like a dickhead.” He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you towards him as gently as he could, “I- You’re right. Josh’s is a better option and we’re gonna go with it… I got a little insecure when you chose him over me.”
His admission made you melt into him as you brought your arms up to wrap around the back of his neck, “I didn’t choose him over you, babe. But I understand where you’re coming from and why it may have seemed like that.” You were lost in his sweet, brown eyes as his lips began to curl, “Jake, I l-.” Realizing what was about to come out of your mouth, you bit down on your lip to stop it. It’s not that you didn’t want to say it, but you didn’t want to spook him, so you skated around those three words with something that felt safer. “You’re mine, okay? And I’m yours. Nothing else matters.”
Jake left a soft kiss on your forehead and everything was still for a moment until he pulled back to look at you, “You sure you don’t wanna come back home with me tonight?”” He made it so hard to say no when he gave you those eyes.
“Of course I want to…” You skimmed your hands down his torso with a sweet smile, “But Bellamy texted and wants to go out for a drink when I get off.” Wiggling your fingers into his pocket, you retrieved your phone to text your friend back.
“You said a movie night.” The way his tone changed told you that he didn’t like the idea of you going out. “I thought you wanted to sleep because you’re working a double tomorrow…But you’re going out to a bar?”
Rolling your eyes, you sent a text to Bell to confirm and tucked your phone away, “I told her one drink and then home. She won’t push, Jake. Trust me.” 
“Then can I go for a drink with you?”
“Jacob…” You rubbed your temples, closing your eyes for a moment, “One night will not kill you. It’s just Bell and I. One drink, then home for the rest of the night.” Digging your hand back into his pocket, you pulled his keys out and dangled them in front of his face. “Babe, go home. You can catch up on that show that I hate and stretch out on the couch or in bed without me clinging to you…” You knew none of it mattered. He’d take every night with you over anything else and he’s made that obvious. “I’ll call you when I get home. I’m gonna go clean up for closing. Go.” Grabbing his hand, you dropped the keys into his palm and closed his fingers around them. You pressed your lips to his cheek before moving by him to go back inside but he caught your wrist, pulling you back.
He didn’t say anything, just stared at you with those pretty, espresso colored eyes. You could’ve gazed into them forever if he didn’t finally speak. “I’m gonna sleep like shit tonight, you know that?” he kissed your temple and released you, walking to his car.
Letting the backdoor fall shut, you went back to the front to begin your closing duties and found Josh sweeping the floor. “Hey, I was gonna do that, hun.” You went for the rag and spray bottle to clean off the front counter and display cases.
“I already wiped everything down, sweetheart.” He gave you a small smile as he brushed the pile of dirt into a dustpan. “In fact, everything is pretty much done. I doubt we’ll get much traffic through here the rest of the night, I’m probably just gonna lock up.” He placed the broom back in its spot behind the counter and glanced at the clock as he smoothed out his mustache, “You can clock out for the night and head home if you want.”
Following his eyes to the clock, you saw that it was about 7:45pm. “Oh. Umm. Yeah, okay. Let me call Bellamy.” You unlocked your phone to find your friend’s contact. You held it to your ear, thankful that you’d be able to go for a drink and get home even earlier than you’d anticipated. “Bell? Hello?” You struggled to hear her over the noise in the background on her end.
What’s up, babe?
“Bellamy, I can barely hear you. Where are you?”
What? Hang on, let me just-... Okay, is that better?
The noise faded out to almost silence, making it easier to hear her clearly. “Yeah. So, you can come get me now.” When she didn’t respond, you repeated yourself, “Bell, you can just come pick me up now. Josh is gonna close early.”
Umm… Can you get a ride to the bar? I don’t have the car, Sam drove.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Bellamy?” It was impossible to mask your annoyance. “I thought it was just going to be us? Like you have my car, how do you expect me to get there?”
We were already out getting dinner so we just came to Louie’s after we ate… Just have Jake bring you, babe.
You could feel Josh’s gaze as you released an aggravated sigh, “Jake isn’t-. You know what. It doesn’t matter. I’m just gonna get an uber home.” Choosing to ignore her protests, you hung up the phone and dropped it on the countertop. “Typical fucking Bellamy.” Burying your face into your palms, you let out a loud groan.
Josh was standing on the opposite side of the counter now, “That sounded a bit stressful… You okay?”
“Yeah. No? I don’t know…” You looked up at him and his expression made you realize how harsh your tone was. Taking a long breath, you forced yourself to relax, “She’s just up Sam’s ass, as usual. I gotta get an uber and then I will be out of your hair, boss.” You gave him a half smile and reached for your phone again.
“No. Hey.” He waited for you to look at him again, “Don’t waste money on that shit… I’ll give you a ride home. I just need to finish up a few things here, if you don’t mind waiting on me?”
You contemplated for a moment but when you finally agreed, he turned around and disappeared through the office door. When he didn’t reemerge, you followed after him. “Is there anything I can help you with at all? I don’t wanna be completely useless.” 
He was crouched behind the desk, gathering something that you couldn’t see, “You? Useless?” He scoffed as he stood up straight, his lip was tucked between his teeth but he wouldn’t look at you. His eyes wandered around the small room as though he were trying to find something, “Y’know… You’re kind of the most useful person we have here.” He walked around the desk, still searching, as he continued, “In fact…” His eyes finally landed on what he’d been looking for, “I could use you right now. Come here.” He waved you towards him and pointed up to the top of the tall bookshelf. “If I lift you, could you reach that?”
You followed the path of his finger to a liquor bottle, carefully hidden behind a few knickknacks. “Yeah… I think so. I should be able to.” Turning back to Josh with a bit of apprehension, you looked him up and down, “Are you sure you can lift me?”
“Are you insinuating that I can’t?” There was a mischievous glint in his eyes and though you knew it was probably a bad idea, you still decided to challenge him.
Crossing your arms over your chest, you raised an eyebrow, “Maybe… I mean, I am the one who does all the heavy lifting when we get the orders in on fridays.” You pursed your lips with a shrug and watched his gaze narrow.
He moved quicker than you anticipated, crouching low and wrapping his arms around your thighs. You screeched as he lifted you with ease and slung you over his shoulder. “Now make yourself useful and get that tequila!”
You were both laughing wildly as you used his shoulders to steady yourself and reached for the bottle. Once your fingers were secured around the neck, he began to carefully lower you. Out of habit, your legs parted to wrap around his waist, an act you were accustomed to doing with your boyfriend. As if he’d done it a million times, Josh’s hands shifted fast, one slipping around your back to hold you against him and the other gripping your thigh just below your ass. As your laughter died down, you became hyper aware of the position you were in, “Well… I got the bottle…” You held it in front of his face and awkwardly peeled your arm from around his neck.
He swallowed hard before placing you back on your feet and clearing his throat, “There’s no ‘I’ in team, Y/N.” He snatched it from your grip and stuck his tongue out at you, effectively replacing the awkward tension with his playfulness. Turning away from you, he grabbed two styrofoam cups from the stack on top of the mini fridge and placed them on the desk to fill each one. “If you tell me you need a chaser, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to look at you the same, sweetheart.” He offered you one of the cups, barely a shot's worth of liquid in it.
You took it and tossed it back without hesitation, if only to prove a point, and immediately coughed as it burned its way down your esophagus. “I fucking hate tequila.” The taste lingered in your mouth and you would’ve given anything for a lime slice or two to chase the bitterness with.
Josh gulped his own shot down with a shocking amount of ease and held the bottle out to refill your cup, “Shall we have another?”
Staring at the liquor, you slowly nodded your head, “Just one more and then I’m done.” You were supposed to go out for a drink anyway so a couple shots couldn’t hurt.
“Hell yeah!” He filled your cup again, a little more than the first time, and then his own. “Bottoms up- err… Cheers? I don’t know.” He clashed his cup against yours and took his shot, shaking his body out with a grimace. “Fuck- that one hurt.”
You couldn’t help but giggle at him, “What’s the matter, Josh? You need a chaser?”
“Shut up and take your shot.” He tried to force a scowl as he splashed the remaining droplets from his cup at you. When you finally stopped laughing and emptied the cup, he took it from you and tossed it in the trash can. “Alright, darlin’... I gotta finalize payroll and finish up some paperwork. It shouldn’t take me too long, so just hangout, make yourself at home.”
Giving him a nod, you turned to exit the room as he took a seat at the desk. Wondering what you could do to pass the time while you waited, you gravitated towards the record player the boys kept beside the counter that played through the speakers in the storeroom. It was rare that you got the chance to choose which albums got played. Jake was particular on what he liked to play while he was working but now you had the turntable to yourself. You flipped through the small collection of vinyls they had and pulled out Abbey Road. Removing it from the sleeve carefully, you laid it on the turntable and placed the needle exactly where you wanted it. Something faded in through the speakers and you cranked the volume a bit before you began swaying through the room. The tequila was making its way into your bloodstream and creating a warm feeling that you just wanted to chase. Singing along softly, you slipped back into the office without a word to your boss and seized the bottle from the desktop. He was humming quietly, a smile plastered on his face as he watched you spin and twirl your way back out of the room.
After side one concluded, you flipped the album and let it play through as you went to dig through the used bins beneath the tables. You were sitting on the floor, sifting through a third crate between sips of liquor, when the music cut off with a slight record scratch. Just as you were about to get up to see what happened, a new song filtered through the room and you felt your heart constrict at the first chord. She Talks to Angels by The Black Crowes was a song that your dad used to play all the time when you were young. He’d pick you up and dance you around the living room while he sang and as you grew older, he’d play it in the car for both of you to sing together. Listening to it now, you couldn’t even remember the last time you’d heard the song and it made your sadness that much more prominent as the first few tears began to fall. 
Josh came into view, his smile falling in an instant when he found you on the floor, slumped against the cabinets and wiping at your cheeks. “What happened? Y/N, what’s wrong?” His concern was evident as he knelt beside you and placed a comforting hand on your knee.
“I’m sorry. I-...” You tried to compose yourself as you looked down at the bottle by your feet. You wanted to throw it across the room, a sense of anger coursing through you at the mere sight of it. “Take this. Please, Josh… Please j-just get it away from me.” 
He took the tequila as you pushed it towards him and placed it behind his body to get it out of your view. “Y/N, you’re scaring me, what’s wrong?” 
You took a few deep, calming breaths and wiped the remaining drops from your face with a sniffle. “Sorry… That song. Umm- I haven’t heard that in forever. I guess it kind of opened up some wounds.” An awkward laugh escaped you as you sat up straight, “God, that’s embarrassing. Sorry.”
“Stop apologizing.” His voice was the softest you’d ever heard it. He reached up to catch a single, stray tear with his thumb, brushing it away from your chin, “You wanna talk about it?”
You never talked about your parents to anybody but Bellamy and even that was rare. Jake didn’t know anything about your life back in Pennsylvania and he never pushed you to talk about it. But now, looking into Josh’s eyes, you felt an overwhelming urge to divulge everything to him and you couldn’t explain why. “My dad used to play that song all the time when I was little, it was like, our song… He was my best friend, Josh. The coolest guy you’d ever know, I swear.” Josh stayed quiet as he settled in beside you, listening respectfully. You went on, sharing small details of your childhood, good and bad memories. When you started to get into the harder details of your teenage years, he took hold of your hand in a comforting and encouraging grasp. “Everytime we thought mom was getting better and slowing down on the drinking, we’d find her hidden bottles… She started getting belligerent when she would drink and it got scary. I hated her- hated being around her. I begged my dad to leave but he wasn’t that kind of man, he always had to take care of everyone.” Your voice began to break as you talked about the last time you saw him, “She was sober, I swear to god she was fucking sober when I came home for fall break. Maybe she just got too good at masking it? I don’t know… But her mask started to slip and she got sloppy fast.” You felt yourself sinking further into Josh’s side for comfort that you didn’t realize you needed, but he welcomed it, wrapping an arm around you. “The knock didn’t come until almost midnight and I knew before I even answered the door… The impact took them both instantly.” It was a lie, but your mother had been dead to you for a while so it made it easier to pretend you lost her with your dad.
“God, Y/N… I’m so sorry- I’m so fucking sorry.” He held you tight, hugging you to his chest as you started to cry again. “I can’t even begin to imagine-...”
You looked up at him, your eyes shiny and bloodshot, “Don’t- please don’t say anything to Jake… I don’t- I’m not ready to tell him yet.” You were gripping his shirt as you pleaded.
Josh nodded softly, “I won’t, promise. It’s not my place, sweetheart.” You hadn’t noticed that the record ended a good while ago, but everything remained silent. Josh’s fingertips lightly grazed up and down your arm and the sound of his light breaths put you at ease, lulling you to sleep. You weren’t sure of how long you’d been out when you heard him speaking quietly through your sleepy haze. He must’ve been on the phone but you couldn’t focus enough to know if it was real or if you were just dreaming. “...Were you sleeping?...I’m still at the store with Y/N. I think you should come get her, man…No- don’t be a dick about this, Jake… Her and Bellamy got into a fight, I just- I don’t think she should be alone tonight…Yeah… Okay… Bye.”
The silence pulled you back into a drowse until a hand was gently shaking you awake, “Peach… wake up, baby.” Your eyelids fluttered for a moment before Jake came into focus. He was looking at Josh, who was standing a foot or so away, staring down at you with the bottle of tequila in his hand. Jake turned back to you, smoothing your hair out of your face, “Let’s get you out of here.” You allowed him to help you up from the floor and lead you through the store towards the back door, only stopping to grab your phone and bag. Josh didn’t say a word as he watched you both go and you were kind of thankful for that. Your boyfriend tucked you into the passenger seat of his car and made sure you were buckled in before he got into the driver’s seat and pulled out of the parking lot. Resting your head against the window, you allowed your eyes to fall shut again. “C’mon, peach. We’re home.”
Picking your head up, you looked around to see you were in the garage at his complex. He eased you out of the car and you held onto him as he led you into the building and to his apartment. Slipping out of your shoes, you broke away from him to go straight to his room and stripped out of your work clothes.
Jake entered the room a minute later to find you in one of his t-shirts, climbing into his bed. He offered you a bottle of water and you knew he was examining your puffy, red eyes. “You wanna talk?”
Chewing on your lip, you shook your head and moved over to make room for him. He put the water on the bedside table and turned the lamp off to crawl in alongside you, instantly wrapping you in his arms and pulling you against him. You returned his embrace, feeling your body melt into him as every ounce of emotional strain began to evaporate the second he kissed the top of your head. You froze, clinging to him, as you felt more tears pricking your eyes, “Jake…” It was the first word you’d spoken to him since he’d picked you up from the store.
His body went rigid at the sound of your cracked voice, “What, baby? What’s wrong?” He held his breath, waiting for you to respond, as his anxiety grew.
“I love you…”
.
.
.
.
.
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aflame4goinghome · 1 year ago
Text
Head First
j.m.k. x f.reader
part one
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a/n: i had an idea for a little josh blurb inspired by this lizzie mcalpine song and i’ve decided to make it into a short series! friends to lovers josh is always my favorite, i hope you guys like it!! the next part will be current day...
summary: You and Josh grew up next door to each other, spending almost your entire life together. He was your closest friend, and that’s how it had always been. One summer, the two of you attend a music festival with your group of friends and a switch seems to flip for him that day, hurling you head first into a weekend of surprises. It feels as though everything has finally fallen into place, but young love is not always meant to last...
word count: 7.9k
warnings: this story contains smut! minors DNI!!! swearing, drinking, flirting, yearning, nicknames, sexually implicit language, heavy petting, kissing; SMUT: oral sex (f. and m. receiving), fingering, unprotected p in v sex (WRAP IT BEFORE YOU TAP IT, Y'ALL), praise kink if you squint i guess, dirty talk, soft dom! josh, fluff at the end! aftercare always!
JULY 2019
“Guys, seriously, come on. We were supposed to leave over half an hour ago!” you yell from the bottom of the stairs. You get no response, so you scoff, storm up the steep stairs to the hallway, and look around for movement. You see the bathroom door cracked open and walk over to push it open, revealing Josh still fixing his curly hair in the mirror.
You roll your eyes and clear your throat to get his attention, causing him to look over at you. “Oh, hey honey,” he says, giving you a sheepish smile. “Josh, it’s almost 8:30! If we don’t leave now, then we won’t have any time to get ready before we have to go down to the festival! You can fix your hair more when we get to the hotel, please,” you plead, making a praying motion with your hands, and giving him the biggest puppy eyes you can manage.
“Yes yes, I know, I’m sorry. I’ll help you round up the rest of them, okay?” he says, taking one last look in the mirror before turning the light off and heading down to the other end of the hallway. Josh breaks off first to enter his room and find his equally tardy twin, who’s still asleep. You giggle as you hear him yell at his brother to wake up, followed by a loud startled scream from Jake.
You enter Sam’s room to find him lying on his bed scrolling through his phone while Daniel is playing the guitar lightly. “Hello? What are you two doing? Come on, get up, let’s go!” you scold them, making Sam jump out of his seat. Danny chuckles to himself as he gets up to put his guitar back in its case.
They gather their packed bags and file out of the room, heading down the stairs. As you return to the hallway, you see Josh and his seemingly exhausted twin exiting the room. Jake descends the stairs with a groan as Josh follows closely behind him, shooting you a wink before he disappears.
Finally, you all finish packing the car and can finally get on the road. The five of you were heading to the Cosmic Sound Festival down in Detroit, something you and Josh planned months ago. The drive was just under 2 hours, so you were still able to get to the hotel in time to change and get ready before you had to be at the grounds for the first set at 12, or so you hoped. You feel grateful that this break in their tour allowed for you all to go to the festival together, as the time you spent together these days was few and far between.
“I call shotgun!” you shout, hurrying to open the door before one of the others beats you to it. “Hey, that’s not fair, Smalls! You always get shotgun!” Sam yells from behind you.
You roll your eyes and turn around to face him. “Yeah, because why would I ever want to be crammed in the back with you idiots? No, thanks. I’m good up here with Josh,” you reply, sticking your nose up at him and smiling proudly before getting into the car and closing the door. Josh shrugs and laughs lightly before getting into the driver’s side, with the rest of the boys following suit and getting into their seats.
Josh turns the car on and rolls the windows down to feel the cool summer breeze. “Ready, Saph?” he says, turning his head to look at you with a wide, crooked smile. His nickname for you never fails to make you smile. He had that effect on you, as he did with a lot of people. He first gave you the nickname in the fourth grade, after you’d learned about different types of gemstones in science class.
The two of you were walking out of the classroom to go to lunch as you turned to look at Josh. “I think rose quartz might be my favorite. They’re so pretty. Which one was your favorite?” you asked. He thought about it for a moment and said, “Sapphire. They’re so blue, and they’re valuable. Pretty, too.” You nodded and smiled at him, then turned your attention back to walking to the lunchroom.
“You’re like a sapphire, you know,” he continued. You looked back up at him with a questioning look. He pointed and said, “Your eyes, they’re the bluest I’ve ever seen. And pretty. Like a sapphire.” You blushed and looked away, not really knowing what to say. “I think I’ll call you Sapphire,” he said. You looked back up at him and smiled timidly. “Okay.”
The nickname has stuck ever since, though it’s almost always shortened. But it’s just his, and that’s what makes it special. Josh was your best friend in the whole world, as well as your longest friend. The Kiszkas were your next-door neighbors your entire life, and you all became friends practically right away. Being the same age as the twins, your mother would bring you over to their house at a very young age, so the three of you grew up together.
Watching Sam grow up and meeting Danny was something you always felt very thankful for. You had the best group of friends that you could ever ask for, who loved and cared for you like you were their own flesh and blood. You also got to watch as the music they made in their garage late on school nights became something much more.
You spent endless nights lying on the battered old couch in the Kiszkas’ garage as the four of them played together. Jake had always played guitar for as long as you could remember and Josh always loved singing, performing in the school musicals with you every year.
But near the end of high school, you watched as Jake’s dream became their collective dream and they started playing gigs around town and in other close cities. Before you knew it, they would make music that would reach thousands of people and tour places all around the world.
Admittedly, you fear for the day that the band gets even bigger than it is now, knowing that they’ll have to leave you. Your whole life was here in Michigan, and you knew that one day their journey would take them much further than here. You help your father run his business in Frankenmuth now, an old music store, where you sell instruments and sometimes teach lessons when he’s busy. You were needed here, and you knew that the guys wouldn’t be able to stay here forever.
For now, their home was still in Michigan, despite their time being taken up by near-constant touring and writing new music. They were just gone for several months on tour and will be returning to touring at the beginning of fall, so now is the chance to spend time with them.
Josh knew how much you missed them when they were away, so he tried to fill up your time this summer with as many activities as possible. He was always thoughtful in the way he planned things, wanting to get the most out of any experience.
“Ready,” you reply with a smile, plugging your phone in to connect to the aux. You press shuffle on your road trip playlist and Got To Get You Into My Life by the Beatles comes on first. “Ah, perfect!” Josh says, smiling as he starts to sing along and drives out of their driveway, down a long winding road toward Detroit. The five of you spend the whole car ride singing along to your favorite songs, with Jake usually vocalizing every single guitar solo.
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Day One
You finally get to the hotel around 10:30, giving you all enough time to get ready before driving to the festival grounds. You got two rooms next to each other, putting Danny and Sam together in one and you and the twins in the other. The room had a pullout couch, which Jake promised he’d stay on since he “barely gets any sleep these days anyway,” and you know that he’ll be out much later than you and Josh will be. He always manages to go off on his own at these types of things.
You throw your things onto one of the beds and then turn to Josh. “Just let me have the bathroom for like twenty minutes and then it’s all yours, okay Diana Ross?” you say, referencing his long, poofy head of hair that goes almost down to his shoulders. He chuckles and flops down on his bed, putting his hands behind his head. “Okay, okay! Whatever, I’ll take some much-needed beauty rest in the meantime,” he says, shutting his eyes as you turn toward your bed, grab your makeup bag and outfit for the day, and then head into the bathroom.
Knowing how hot it was outside this weekend, you decide to wear a pair of short overalls with a burnt orange sports bra underneath to match your Converse of the same color. You pull your hair half up, putting that half-section of hair into a messy bun and pulling out some front pieces to frame your face.
With your hair done and out of your face, you just apply a base of makeup and use setting spray so that you don’t sweat it off. You place your aviator sunglasses on the top of your head and then exit the bathroom. “All yours,” you say, going to sit on the edge of your bed and plug your phone in to charge until it’s time to leave.
With your back turned, you can’t see the way that Josh is looking at you. As always, you were oblivious to it. He gets up from the bed and grabs his clothes, and as he walks over to the bathroom he turns around to look back at you.
You’re just sitting there, scrolling away on your phone, but he stands there for a moment to admire you; the way your eyelashes curl upward, the way your long hair lays down your back, the way the bare skin of your torso peaks through in your overalls. He sighs to himself quietly, then turns around and goes into the bathroom.
Jake didn’t need to use the bathroom, he was already dressed and ready to go in a short-sleeved button-down shirt (half-unbuttoned), jeans, and light brown Chelsea boots. You couldn’t imagine how that would be comfortable for a festival, but Jake’s fashion always eluded you.
Next thing you know, Josh emerges from the bathroom, hair all “fixed.” He’s wearing a plain white t-shirt with a burnt orange bandana, accidentally matching you, and some khaki shorts and white sneakers. You look up at him and smile, and he says, “Okay! Let’s rock and roll!”
The three of you go next door to collect Sam and Danny, who are thankfully ready to go. Sam pulled his long hair into a low bun and threw on a loose long-sleeve button-down with the sleeves rolled up paired with shorts, contrasting Danny in his band tee and skinny jeans, who has also pulled his hair back.
You all head down to the car and drive over to the festival, planning to try and get there early to watch Tame Impala’s set at 4 PM- Jake’s idea of course. The 1975 will go on at the same stage at 8 PM, which is what you’re looking forward to more. The main event, however, will be Hozier tomorrow night, which is something you’re all anticipating. You’ll also go to see Tyler Childers tomorrow afternoon before Hozier’s set, at Josh’s request.
Jake, Sam, and Danny want to be close to the front for Tame Impala’s set, so they rush to the front to save a spot while you and Josh go to find the alcohol. You walk ahead of Josh, trying to weave in and out of the crowd to find the booth, holding his hand tightly behind you to stay together. As always, with your back turned you can’t see the pink hue that has graced his cheeks at the feeling of your hand tight in his.
Finally, you approach the table and get in line. As Josh meets you at your side, he squeezes your hand tightly before dropping it and combing his fingers through his hair. Your face softens as you look at him for a moment before turning to look around you. The line isn’t too terribly long, luckily, since you both desired to be far more intoxicated.
“God, it’s hot, huh?” you say, reaching behind you to pull your hair off of your neck and wipe off the sweat. Josh nods and wipes some droplets of sweat off of his forehead. “Yeah, it’s not ideal, is it? We’ll make do though, I’m sure. We always do,” he says with a smile, always the optimist. You reach the front of the line shortly and order two Bud Lights, three black cherry White Claws, and five bottles of water, and then turn to head back to the main stage. They gave you bags, thank god, since you wouldn’t possibly be able to carry all of those drinks back by yourselves.
“Still feeling hot?” Josh asks with a smirk as he walks next to you with the bag of water bottles in his hand. You nod and before you can react, he giggles as he takes one of the bottles out of the bag and shoves it into your bare side, causing you to scream from the cold touch. You shove him away from you and yell, “Josh! What the hell is wrong with you? That was so cold!”
He’s cracking up as he comes back close to you and snakes his arm around you, pulling you into him. “Sorry, Saph. You said you were hot! A gentleman is meant to help a lady in need, is he not?” You roll your eyes and then lean into him. “You’re such an idiot,” you scoff. “Your idiot,” he replies with a smile.
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You finally make it back to the guys, who have found a spot a few rows back from the barricade. You hand everyone their drinks and point to Danny and Sam with a stern finger. “You’re both lucky I bought these for you. Behave yourselves, if you get caught I don’t want to go down with you,” you say as they both laugh and take a sip of their drinks.
You all hang out and listen to the set of one of the smaller artists who’s playing on the stage now, just vibing to the music. It didn’t matter if any of you knew who it was or what they were playing, it was just fun to be there together. You smiled and danced by yourself to the songs, in your own world. Josh is to your right, the two of you are standing just behind the others as you’d gotten there later. He looks over at you with a content smile as he watches you enjoy yourself, appreciating how lucky he feels to be there in that moment.
You feel his eyes on you this time, however. You turn your head to look at him and a smile grows across your face as you lock eyes with him. “What?” you ask, turning to face him. “Nothing, darling. Just you,” he answers, looking down at you. “Just me? What about me?”
He reaches down to brush some hair out of your face. “All of you. I just feel very grateful to be here with you, Saph.” Your cheeks flush as you look up at him with a shy smile. There’s some conflict in his eyes and you can tell that he wants to say more, but he doesn’t.
You reach up to wrap your arms around him and pull him in for a tight hug, breathing him in. You feel him sigh into your neck and put his arms around your waist as you squeeze him tightly and then pull away, his arms still around you. When you look up into his eyes at that moment, there’s a feeling there that you don’t recognize, a strong force pulling you toward him. You find yourself not wanting to let go, feeling this innate need to be close to him. It almost feels out of control. You’re not sure what triggered it or what you’re meant to do, but you plan to find out.
The set ends and people file out of the pit slowly. You have some time before the 1975’s set, and even though you don’t want to lose your spot, you need a break. Jake and Sam split off and say that they’re going to go to the Strokes set in an hour, so they head to another stage. Danny opts to stay for the 1975 set with you and Josh and says he’ll hold the spot if you and Josh take a break and go get food and water.
The two of you go to find a food truck to get something to eat, struggling to make your way through the crowd. As you approach the field where all the food trucks are, you look to your left and exclaim, “Oh my god, look! They have a big water sprinkler! C’mon Josh, let’s go let’s go!”
You grab his hand and pull him after you toward the sprinkler, where dozens of other people are cooling off in the cold water. You run under the water and turn around to face him, giggling and pulling him under with you. He smiles wide as the water hits his head, drenching his hair and causing it to lay long and flat on his shoulders. He shuts his eyes tight as it soaks him and his white shirt becomes completely damp, causing it to stick tight to his skin.
Your hair is wet and sticking to your cheeks and you know your overalls will be wet all night, considering jean materials never dry quickly, but you don’t care. The cool water feels so good on your skin after such a long day as you lean your head back and soak it all in.
You look over at Josh, smiling from ear to ear and you stop to admire how honestly beautiful he looks like this. He slicked his wet hair to lay down his back and you watch as little droplets of water drip onto his cheeks from his thick eyebrows. You can see hints of his abdominal muscles thanks to the tightness of his wet t-shirt and you’d be lying if you said that your eyes didn’t linger there.
You pull him into you, wrapping your arms around his waist. Your wet clothes are sticking tight to both of you- a slightly uncomfortable feeling but welcomed for the experience to cool down. “Your shirt is wet,” you state matter-of-factly, giggling as you pull back a bit to look at him. “Really? You’re kidding,” he laughs, reaching his hands down to swipe the wet hair off of your face.
You sigh and look up at him with a grin. “Hungry?” you ask. “Starved,” he says. He looks down at you for a moment, his eyes drift to your lips for a second and linger there before traveling up to meet your gaze, the look on his face much more serious than you were ever used to. You take a deep breath, the moment starting to feel a bit more intimate than you’d anticipated. “Let’s go get some walking tacos!” you say, leaving the sprinkler and heading toward the food trucks.
Josh sheds his shirt off as you walk, needed to squeeze the water out and let it dry in the sun for a bit. You’ve seen him shirtless your whole life, you should be used to it by now, but you have to admit that it felt different this time. You let yourself stare a bit too long at the way his wet chest shimmers in the light of the sun, realizing that you need to snap out of it and stop getting distracted.
You and Josh grab your walking tacos, saving one for Danny and grabbing a few more bottles of water, then start the trek back to the stage. You both decide to eat a bit as you walk, being so hungry that you can’t wait until you get back. As you walk, Josh drops a bit of ground beef onto his bare chest and you erupt into laughter.
“Here, let me get it,” you manage to get out through laughs. You both stop walking and you take a napkin out of the bag and then bring it to his chest. You wipe a bit from his chest and then notice a bit of sauce further down toward his belly button.
You reach down and wipe that as well, hearing his breath catch a bit at the feeling of your hand there. Your eyes shoot up to his face, which is now a light shade of pink. Your lips turn up slightly into a subtle smile and you say, “There. All better.” You take your hand away and watch him finally breathe out, then turn away and start walking again. Interesting.
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You reach Daniel back at your spot by the stage and hand him his food. “What happened to you guys? You’re soaking wet,” he asks. “We found a water sprinkler. Felt great,” you answer with a smile. He shrugs and starts eating his food and the three of you hang out until it’s time for the band to come on. Josh slips his shirt back on, which is now significantly less damp.
The 1975 comes on stage as the sun starts to go down, cooling the air down considerably. You’re having so much fun dancing around with your best friends and there’s truly nowhere else you’d rather be. You and Danny sing along to every song as Josh watches and dances along, not really knowing the songs but having fun, nonetheless.
The band closes out the set with your favorite song, Sex. You scream as the song starts and jump around with a wide smile on your face, taking Josh’s hand in yours. He jumps with you, watching you instead of the show as you jump around grinning ear to ear, singing along.
When they get to the third verse, however, Josh can’t take his eyes off of you. The way you’re dancing and singing to a song with these kinds of lyrics is doing something to him that he didn’t expect.
Now we're just outside of town,
And you're making your way down
And I'm not trying to stop you, love,
If we're gonna do anything, we might as well just fuck
You sing along to the song as you take his hands in yours and dance with him. His eyes are piercing through you as he studies you, but you don’t notice with all the excitement. As the chorus starts, he pulls you in and twirls you around, smiling down at you.
You sway with him as the chorus continues and the song ends, much closer than you’d expected to be with your chests touching. As the crowd erupts into applause, you find yourself getting lost in his eyes for a moment. He’s looking down at you, his breath a bit heavy from the dancing, trying to get a glimpse of what’s going on inside your mind.
Before you can say anything, Danny turns around to you guys and says “Well, time to go,” then starts heading toward the exit. You snap back into reality at that moment, releasing your hold on Josh and stepping back a bit, then following after Danny. Josh follows closely behind.
The three of you head back to the hotel after getting a text that Jake and Sam planned to go to a bar down the street from where you’re staying before returning. They say they’ll meet you at the hotel, so you leave without them. When you arrive, you split off from Daniel at his room and then you and Josh head into yours.
You go into the bathroom to put on a tank top and a pair of sweatshorts then wash your face and pull your hair back into a low ponytail. You open the bathroom door and see that Josh has already changed, having thrown on a pair of sweatpants and opting to go without a shirt. He’s sitting on the edge of his bed, reading something on his phone, and looks up as he hears you come out.
He watches you as you walk toward your bed and sit down there across from him. He seems a bit deep in thought, his face not as lit up as usual. “Tired?” you ask, bringing your legs up onto the bed and leaning to your left arm onto the pillow. “Yeah, something like that,” he says, giving you a half smile. He goes to lie down but still faces your direction, and you do the same, just looking at him for a moment before finally speaking again.
“Hey, Josh?” you say, looking at him across the chasm between your beds.
“Yeah, Saph?” he answers.
“I miss you a lot when you’re gone.”
“I know, darling. We miss you too, always.”
“I mean just you. Not that I don’t miss the others too, but… You make everything better, Josh. Everything feels so much easier when you’re here,” you confess, meeting his gaze with a soft smile.
“Everything is easier with you there, too. It’s like you add air to my lungs. You walk into a room and it’s like a breath of fresh air,” he answers, smiling back at you.
Your face drops a little bit and you want to say more, but before you get the chance, you hear the door as Jake waltzes in, drunk off his ass. “Oh. You’re still up,” he slurs out, then flops down onto the bed he’s made on the couch.
Josh leans up to turn the lamp off and looks over at you. “Goodnight, honey,” he says, turning the switch. “Goodnight.”
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Day Two
The hotel alarm clock goes off at 9 AM, bright and early. You rub your eyes and sit up in your bed as you hear groans from the other side of the room. “Oi! Turn that shit off!” Jake hollers from the couch. You chuckle as you turn off the alarm and get up to start getting ready.
Josh is still sleeping peacefully, having not heard the alarm at all. He snores lightly as you walk over to his bed and bring your hand down to his head, brushing his hair back out of his face and then shaking his shoulder softly.
“Come on, honey. Time to get up,” you say as his eyes flutter open and land on you, causing him to give you a sleepy, toothless grin. “Morning, Saph,” he mumbles, rubbing his eyes as he sits up in bed. “Good morning, Sleeping Beauty. Long day ahead of us,” you reply, heading into the bathroom to get ready for the day.
You pull your hair back into a loose French braid down your back and then wash your face and apply some base makeup once again. You put on a small sky-blue cropped tank top and black biker shorts, then open the bathroom door and walk back into the room.
Considering you were spending the weekend with four men, you knew they wouldn’t be changing their outfits that much. Josh had subbed out his white t-shirt for a black one of the same kind, wearing similar-looking shorts. Jake wore a Guns n Roses t-shirt with the sleeves cut off and a darker pair of jeans.
You sit down on the edge of your bed across from Josh and tie on your Converse. “I quite like how you styled your hair,” Josh says, looking over at you. “Beautiful.” You take your attention away from your shoes to look at him, trying to make sure you heard him right. He’s looking at you in such adoration, it’s hard for you to understand.
You smile shyly and blush a bit as your eyes lock with his before turning your attention back to your shoes. “Thank you, Josh…” you mumble, not sure how to react, especially with Jake in the room. His presence becomes especially apart when you hear him chuckle to himself behind you at his brother’s attempt at flattery. Josh scoffs and then stands up and walks toward the door. “Shall we?” he says, opening the door. The three of you file out and meet up with Sam and Danny and then go to the car once again.
When you arrive at the grounds, you all get drinks together and have a round or two before Tyler Childers’ set at 3 PM. You didn’t know much of his music, but Josh really liked him and you were tipsy enough not to worry about it too much. The five of you had a spot closer to the barricade this time since you’d gotten there early enough, so you had a great view of the stage.
Josh enjoyed the set, smiling and grooving to the music. The songs were folky and country, which made it quite easy to dance along and enjoy it. You watched Josh as he blissfully watched the show, unaware of how truly content he looked and how it made you feel. You couldn’t help but smile as you studied him, admiring how much kindness and beauty exuded from his soul.
You looked at how his curls looked as the summer breeze blew lightly. You watched how his eyes squinted as he smiled wider and sang along. You observed how his lips looked- full, pink, and warm. You admired his hands as they were wrapped around his torso, almost like he was hugging himself. You couldn’t look away even if you tried. He was an enigma.
There was a particular song at the end of the set that really sparked something in him, All Your’n. When it started, Josh took his gaze away from the performance to look at you with a grin. He wrapped his arm around you, his hand gripping your right shoulder softly as he leaned his head to the side on top of yours and sang along to the song.
So I'll love ya 'til my lungs give out
I ain't lying
I'm all your'n and you're all mine
You smile as you dance with him to his favorite song. Seeing him happy was all you needed in the world, and you’d do anything to be the one contributing to it. Your face flushes as you feel him place a soft kiss on the top of your head and then nestle his head on your shoulder, swaying as the song comes to an end. At that moment, there was nowhere you’d rather be. You knew you’d do anything to experience this feeling every day, for the rest of your life.
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The five of you went to the other side of the grounds to eat a quick dinner before returning to your spot by the stage. As you ate, your mind was clouded with only thoughts of Josh and how different things felt. Of course, you’ve always felt a deep connection with him, a bond that could never be broken. You loved him, but the context of that love felt different now.
You’re unsure if it was the recent distance due to their tour or just that the two of you were growing up but after today, your love for him has seemed to turn into adoration. Being with him felt like a piece of you had been returned to you, as though you were only truly whole when he was by your side. His presence felt like breathing fresh air into your lungs after being submerged under water. You understand now what it means, and you think he does too.
Soon, it’s time to get back for Hozier’s set, what you’d all been waiting for. All of the guys were a fan of his, but none of them were nearly as big of a fan as you were. Every song felt like it reflected your soul and your heart in a way that no other music does.
The set begins and you know every song, of course. He plays all of his hits, one of your favorites being Jackie and Wilson. As he sings the song, you’re dancing around and pull Josh in to dance with you. You take his hands in yours and sway with him, jumping around with the largest grin imaginable spread across your face. He’s smiling back down at you and laughing as he lets you maneuver him in whatever way you want to. He even twirls you around a few times, making you giggle.
The mood switches as Hozier begins to play Work Song, which is one that has always resonated with you. You keep Josh’s hand in yours as you watch and sing along. You feel him give your hand a tight squeeze, causing you to look up at him. He gives you a closed-lip smile as he looks down at you, his eyes lingering on your lips for a moment.
There’s nothing sweeter than my baby
I’d never want from the cherry tree
‘Cause my baby’s sweet as can be
She give me toothaches just from kissin’ me
The other guys were standing in front of you and despite the crowd of people behind you, you suddenly felt alone there in that moment, eyes never straying from each other’s gaze. Your expression softens as you turn your body to face him and he wraps his arm around your waist and lowers his head to press his forehead to yours. You shut your eyes and take a deep breath as the song continues, swaying with him.
When my time comes around
Lay me gently in the cold dark earth
No grave can hold my body down
I’ll crawl home to her
You open your eyes and meet his, breathing heavily from the heat of the crowd as well as the tension. You start to overthink the entire situation but before you’re able to voice your thoughts, Josh finally brings his lips to yours. Your entire body relaxes in his arms as he pulls you closer to him. It feels as though he’s put the air back into your lungs, like you’ve been living your whole life without something that you know now that you could never live without.
You bring your hands up the back of his neck as you deepen the kiss. You grip his hair at the nape of his neck lightly, eliciting a quiet groan from Josh. He nips your bottom lip and you giggle as you finally pull away, his arms still holding you. It’s almost like the rest of the world disappeared in that moment, you heard the song playing on but you didn’t even notice.
The set ends and you quickly let go of each other before the others turn around to face you. Something you can’t hide, however, is the pink hue on both of your cheeks and swollen lips, which slightly gives you away.
“Ready to go? I could sleep for a day, it feels like,” Danny says, starting to head out toward the exit. You all start to walk out as Jake elbows his twin, chuckling and whispering, “Feeling okay there, brother? You’re looking a little… flushed.”
Josh rolls his eyes and walks a bit faster as he mutters, “Yes, Jake, I’m perfectly fine,” and takes your hand to drag you with him. You laugh as you follow closely behind him to the car and he drives the five of you back to the hotel for the night.
*:·.·:**:·.·:**:·.·:**:·.·:*༺˚ ⊹♫⊹ ˚༻*:·.·:**:·.·:**:·.·:**:·.·:*
You all arrive back at the hotel and as you get out of the car, Jake says, “You guys wanna go find somewhere to have a few pints?” Danny and Sam all answer in agreement, but Josh shakes his head. You look at him for a moment and meet his eyes. “Yeah, I think Josh and I might stay back, if that’s okay. It’s been a long couple of days,” you say, looking back at the guys with a shy smile.
Jake chuckles to himself. “Okay then, suit yourself. If you’re so tired, then I won’t come in late and wake you. I’ll stay with Sam and Daniel,” he answers with a wink to Josh. Damn these twins, you can’t get anything past them. Josh sighs and says okay before turning to head inside the hotel. You follow him up, beginning to feel a bit nervous.
Josh opens the door to your room and you both walk inside, closing the door behind you. When the door is finally shut, Josh turns around to face you. Before you can say anything, his lips find yours once again. You sigh into his mouth as he pushes you up against the door, his hands holding your waist tightly.
Your hands find their place around his neck as he deepens the kiss, his hands traveling from your waist to the swells of your ass. “Fuck,” you gasp under your breath, the feeling of his hands on you becoming almost too much to handle. That’s when he uses his grip to lift you and wrap your legs around his waist, bringing you over to your bed and laying you down.
He stands at the edge of the bed and removes his t-shirt, pulling it over his head in one swift movement. You take that moment to remove your own, sitting up on your elbows for a moment as you take it off and then pull your sports bra over your head.
Josh looks down to admire you for a moment before leaning over you, still standing but kneeling one leg slightly on the bed. He pulls you in for a kiss with one hand cupping your cheek as he reaches the other down to grasp your breast, kneading it softly with his fingers and groaning quietly into your mouth.
“Saph, you are so beautiful. Sculpted by God himself,” he says, leaning his forehead against yours. “Josh…” you start, rubbing your thumb along his cheek. “Shhh,” he whispers, bringing his finger to your lips. “We can discuss it later. Right now, I just need to feel you… gotta make sure that this isn’t some sort of dream.”
He leans back away from you to lower himself to the floor and then starts pulling down the waistband of your shorts. Leaning up on your elbows, you watch as he pulls your shorts down, agonizingly slow. He brings his hands down to pull them down over the curves of your ass when he notices that you’d opted to go without any underwear today. He kisses your inner thigh with a low moan and then looks up at you and says, “No panties? Dirty girl…”
He helps you out of your shorts the rest of the way then reaches up to grasp your ass cheeks, causing you to spread your legs for him. “So perfect,” he mutters, reaching one hand down to run his fingers through your folds. “Is this all for me, baby?” he asks, looking up at you with his eyes dark with lust.
“All for you, Josh. Only you,” you nod, sighing at the feeling of his fingers right where you’ve longed for them to be. “Lucky me…” he whispers before lowering his mouth down to your aching core. He licks into you like a man starved, lapping up the wetness at your folds before wrapping his lips tightly around your clit, making you whine and lean your head back.
He inserts one finger inside you, causing you to moan again, and then removes his mouth from you to speak. “Look at me, baby. Wanna see how angelic you look when I bring you over the edge.” You look down at him and he curls his finger inside of you before adding another one. He attaches his lips back onto you, sucking lightly as he curls his fingers inside of you, eliciting all kinds of lude noises from your mouth, which was exactly what he wanted.
“God, Josh. Fuck, I’m so close,” you whine, gripping the comforter of the bed tightly as you continue to look down at him. “Give it to me, angel. Want it so bad, do it,” he says against your clit with a groan, quickening his movements. You finally feel the band snap inside you and call out his name as he works you through it, taking his mouth off of you and slowing his fingers inside of you.
He kisses your inner thigh again before bringing his fingers up to his mouth, sucking your release off of them. “Mmm, fuck. You taste like heaven, my love. I fear I might get addicted,” he says, standing up to remove his shorts along with his boxers, stepping out of them, and then leaning back down to kiss you. He licks into your mouth and holds the back of your head steadily as you bring your hand down to stroke him lightly.
He groans against you and ruts his hips into your hand and you quicken your pace and then lean up to push him off of you. “My turn,” you say with a smirk, pushing him down onto the bed to lay with his head on the pillow. He looks up at you as the corners of his mouth turn into a smile and you crawl up toward him, taking his hardened length into your hand.
You bend down and swirl the tip with your tongue, then take it into your mouth. You work your mouth down onto it slowly until your nose touches the happy trail on his lower abdomen. You’re met with a long groan from Josh as he leans his head back onto the headboard with one of his hands gripping your hair lightly.
You continue to bob your head along his length, occasionally stopping to gag on it for a few moments at the hilt, causing him to sputter out various expletives. Before it gets too far, he goes to pull your head off of him with a groan. “Baby, if you keep going like that, I’m not gonna make it long enough to feel what this divine pussy feels like wrapped around me.” You blush at his direct language, something you’re still not used to hearing from him.
“You want me, Josh? Wanna feel me?” you tease, crawling up to straddle him, feeling his dick flush against your soaked folds. You reach down and put your hands around his neck, gripping his hair as you lean closer to him. “I need it, Saph. Haven’t been able to think about anything else all night besides how good it would feel to be inside you,” he whispers, holding your hips so tightly that you know it would leave a bruise.
You don’t need to hear anything else before you bring a hand down to grip his length and lift your hips to lower yourself down onto him. He grips your sides tighter as you make your way slowly to the hilt, adjusting to the size. He leans his head back with a groan as you finally lift your hips up and then back down.
He leans up to capture your lips with his and moans into your mouth as you grind repeatedly down onto him. “God, baby. Feels so good. So perfect for me,” he mutters, gripping you tightly as he starts to thrust up into you quickly, causing you to whine and try to steady yourself on the bed.
It feels unlike any other man you’ve ever been with. Not only do you feel safe and loved by someone you trust the most, but it feels like everything has finally fallen into place. The two of you were destined and your intimacy now only proves it further. You were meant to be his.
Josh flips you over onto your back and re-enters you, bringing his hand up to hold the back of your neck and kiss you passionately. His tongue slips past your lips as his other hand grips your hip and he thrusts into you, repeatedly hitting the same spot that drives you wild. “That’s it, honey, that’s it,” he whispers, bringing his hand from your hip to rub circles around your clit as he lowers his mouth to attach to one of your hardened nipples.
You moan at the overstimulating feeling of his mouth on you combined with his quick movements on your clit and throw your head back against the headboard. “Fuck, Josh, don’t stop I’m-” you mumble as he removes his mouth from you to interrupt you. “I know, baby, I’m right there with you. Let me have it.”
That’s all you need to hear before reaching your second orgasm, and Josh is not far behind you. He brings his mouth to yours as he finally releases inside of you, slowing his thrusts as he fucks it back into you until he stills his movements entirely. He brings his hand to caress your cheek and looks down at you with a wide smile, his cheeks flushed and rosy.
“Stay here, okay? I’ll be right back, baby,” he says, pulling out of you slowly and then padding off toward the bathroom. He returns with a wet washcloth and a small cup of water, setting it down on the side table and then sitting down at the edge of the bed next to you. He cleans you up delicately, almost pampering you, and then reaches up to move some of your hair from in front of your eyes.
“So beautiful. I’m still not sure how I got so lucky,” he says, smiling down at you. You sit up a bit and kiss his lips sweetly, then lean your forehead against his. “I love you, Josh.”
“I love you too, my Sapphire. More than words, and you know I’m not usually speechless… You’re everything to me, Y/N,” he answers, rubbing his thumb on your cheek.
You both slip on some comfier clothes to sleep in, just in case Jake decides to come back in the morning. He then turns the lamp off then climbs into your bed with you, laying on his side to face you. You turn to face him as well, looking into his eyes silently for a moment.
“I’m not sure what I’d do without you, Josh. You’re my world, more than you know,” you admit.
“I know, my love. You’ll never have to find out. I’ll always be yours. Always,” he answers, bringing his hand down to stroke your hair affectionately. The two of you drift off to sleep in each other’s arms, where you were always meant to be.
Or so you thought. One can never predict where the road may take you… What seems to be love at one point can turn into nothing within a moment’s notice. Nothing lasts forever, despite all efforts to fight it. But love doesn’t always fade away entirely, does it?
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part two
208 notes · View notes
ashisill · 7 days ago
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Colorado woman
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Warnings: (Abusive past relationship, past relationship trauma, illusions to sexual trauma,language, slight ptsd, drinking, smoking, and I believe thats all. If I missed any feel free to let me know)
Summary: Josh had given up on looking for a partner. After the last woman he swore he’d never love again. After two years of being alone his brothers started to believe him. They decided to take matters into their own hands. Lucky for them his dream woman awaits in Colorado … you.
: This is the longest fic I’ve ever written, so please give me a little bit to fix any mistakes!
~
“Let’s go out Josh. We can go to that bar Sam loves, and find you a partner. Or at least someone to fill that void”
“How many times have I told you? I don’t want a relationship. The last thing I want is to find someone drunk at a bar. Gross”
“Jeez Joshua look at you. You’ve lived at my house for two weeks now. Admit it your starting to get lonely and you don’t like it”
He laughed out loud “I’m not lonely I just don’t want to be stuck at my house all the time. Is that so bad?
“You have been sleeping in my spare room for two weeks. That’s a lot different than wanting to get out of the house for a while”
“I mean I’ll leave if your kicking me out” He laughed it off.
“That not what I’m saying Josh. Tell me what’s your type?”
“Don’t have one. I’m not like you Jake. I like to do my own thing. I wouldn’t be happy tied down to anyone”
“I’ve been doing my own thing for eight years, and my relationship is thriving”
“Well congratulations. That’s you not me. I promise you the last thing I want is a relationship”
“Then make it a fling, but for gods sake put yourself out there”
“You know I don’t see how this is any of your business or concern”
“I want you to be happy Josh, and I know that you’re not. You can brush me off like you always do, but you are lonely and it scares you. You know I don’t care if you stay with me, but you shouldn’t have to. You’re like damn near depressed all the time and that worries me Josh”
“Do you what scares me more? Getting into a relationship and everything being the same as the last one. I’d rather be lonely than risk having to feel like that again”
“Now was it that hard to open up to me? You’re not even looking. I’m not saying you have to jump into anything, but when’s the last time you’ve tried?”
“I have tried they just never work out”
“Josh you haven’t tried since … her”
“And so fucking what? You know what Jake but out. You’re not helping. All you’ve done is bitch at me” Jake just stared at him “what?”
“Josh” he placed a hand on his shoulder “All I’m trying to say is don’t give up looking. Don’t shut everyone out because you’re afraid. I want to see the light come back to your eyes. Because right now Josh I’ve never seen you so dull. Keep an open mind that’s all”
He sighed rubbing the back of his neck “Okay Jake”
~
“Do you think we should teach them more tricks?” Sam said to his girlfriend Hannah as they watched the dogs play in the yard. They heard the doorbell ring. “I got it last time” Hannah said.
Sam opened the door surprised to see who it was. “Didn’t expect you today what’s up?”
“I need to talk to you about Josh”
He took Jake to the backyard where they were sitting. “What’s up? Is he okay?”
“Sam he’s been staying at my house for two weeks. Not that I mind him there what so ever, but I worry for him. He needs someone new in his life. Hell at this point he needs a friend at least”
He looked at his girlfriend puzzled, and she spoke “he stayed at our place a few weeks ago. Sometimes he comes over for dinner as well”
“He’s scared because of that bitch. I hate her for everything she’s done to him”
“I mean I’m sure he is scared after all that. She practically abused him id probably give up for a while too”
“But it’s Josh the most loving person we know. He’s wasting all of his potential he needs someone. He’s not happy I’ve never seen his eyes so sad”
“You really wanna risk it again? We don’t know everything he went through in the first place. I think we just need to let him figure this out”
“It’s been almost two years Sam. He won’t do it himself”
“He’ll be fine we shouldn’t push him. If he gets hurt again it’s all our fault. I don’t want that guilt on my chest”
“I’m with Jake on this one. The last time Josh was over we smoked together. He got very upset, and was kinda spilled a lot to me. I promised him I wouldn’t tell, but Jake’s right I think he needs helps”
“That’s what I came here for thank you. Do we know of anyone?”
Sam sighed “There’s that one girl that we met at that festival”
“You want him with a junkie?”
“She wasn’t a junkie!”
“Sam honey you’re oblivious. I know someone that might be perfect. Only thing is she lives in Colorado”
“Josh always says he wants to live in the mountains. What’s she like?”
“Well she’s currently kinda in the same situation as him. Rough love life scared to move on. He would fall in love instantly. She’s beautiful”
“Personality?” Jake asked “she better be an angel”
“Just picture Josh, but as a female. I’d say she’s a more little outgoing than him. She reminds me of him a lot, but they are very different in their own ways”
“Good start” Jake said nodding his head.
“She very soft spoken. Overall she’s just a very kind hearted person. She’s the only person I know that would never hurt him”
“You’re positive she’s single?” Sam asked
“Yes she always says she talks to her dogs more than people. She lives alone, but says she hates being alone. She loves company because she doesn’t get it much living out in the mountains. I just know she would love Josh. They fit each other”
“Well you know it’s convenient that we’re off tour. How the hell are we getting Josh to Colorado?”
“I can talk to her. She would adore everyone coming out there. Let me see when she’s free” she stepped inside to make a phone call.
“Josh has always handled himself, but I’m watching him fall apart. He doesn’t act like himself anymore. He’s not content. When he’s home he’s pacing around the house. Or he’ll leave and distract himself for hours” Jake told his brother.
“I guess I didn’t realize how bad it’s gotten. He puts on a show for everyone. I suppose I wasn’t able to see through it like you did”
“The last thing I want is for him to get hurt again. He just needs his confidence back”
Hannah returned with a smile “everyone free next week?”
~
“Colorado?” Josh questioned picking at his fingers “why out of the blue?”
“My friend invited us to come stay with her for a week” Hannah said convincingly.
“Who’s your friend?” Josh asked perking up an eyebrow.
“Well her name is y/n, and I haven’t seen her in a while. She invited me and Sam, but we thought you guys might want to come”
“I don’t suppose I have anything better to do. Next week you said?”
Hannah got excited when he agreed. “Yes next week, and we will leave early that morning. This is gonna be so much fun!”
~
The air was cool, the green of the leaves was almost gone, and they were minutes away from arrival. A cozy little cabin in the middle of nowhere. Just you, and your dogs. You’ve spent the past week cleaning, stocking up on food, and preparing your house for guests. It’s not often you get them. Living so far away from everything your use to being alone. You would be lying if you said you weren’t beyond excited. You heard serval cars disrupt the once peaceful gravel road. Your dog’s ears perked up as you all headed towards the door. You hoped they wouldn’t be afraid of the large dogs that causally lounge around your home. You took a breath and opened the door.
“Why am I nervous?” Josh whispered to Jake.
“New place new person. Hannah said she’s a lot like you so maybe you’ll get along well”
“This isn’t a set up is it?”
He laughed “You think I would take you all the way to Colorado to set you up?”
“Yes … yes I do”
He sighed “well I didn’t. It’s just a trip Hannah invited us on. I know as much as you do. Just relax it will be fun”
He squinted his eyes at him “whatever you say”
You stood on the porch watching as they all unloaded from the cars.
“Y/n!” Hannah ran up hugging you.
“I missed you so much. I’m so happy you’re here!”
“This is Sam my boyfriend”
“I know you” you giggled “heard lots”
“Good things I hope. This is my bestie Danny”
“Hi Danny. Your hair so curly I’m jealous”
“Thank you” he laughed.
“This is Jake and his girlfriend” They waved at you, and you smiled back.
“And this is Josh”
“Oh” you paused “hello I’m y/n”
“Nice to meet you” he said quietly.
Maybe you were crazy, but you felt a connection. You known him for five seconds but you feel drawn to him. His fluffy hair that his fingers nervously ran through. His sense of style was definitely your taste. He was more soft spoken than the rest. You liked that a lot. He just had this air about him that made you want to know him.
You invited everyone inside, and you realized it was already late in the afternoon. You showed them around your place before the sun started to set. Everyone started to settle in and feel more at home.
“Very lovely place you got” Jake said admiring the cozy atmosphere.
“Thank you it’s Jake right?” You asked.
“Correct” he gave you a wink.
“I don’t wanna be that person, but where are we sleeping?” Sam asked.
“Sam don’t be rude” Josh corrected.
“No worries. So I only have one guest bedroom so the couples will have to fight over that” you laughed. “There’s an air mattress, and a couch”
“We call the bedroom” Jake shouted smiling at his girlfriend.
“Oh fuck you” Sam rolled his eyes.
“I mean he did say it first” Danny laughed.
“I promise the air mattress won’t deflate on you in the middle of the night. It was quite the investment”
“Then we call the air mattress” Sam said.
“I never mind sleeping on a couch. I’m used to it” Danny laughed.
Josh becoming worried “I guess I’ll be sleeping on the couch too?”
“No you’re sleeping on the floor Joshua” Danny said shaking his head. “No way in hell am I sleeping on a couch with you”
“Thank god I don’t have to share a bed with him” Jake said. “Tired of waking up with bruises”
“Rough sleeper?” You asked
They all laugh “absolutely. I used to be forced to share a bed with him when we were little I never got any sleep. He tossed and turned all night, and he kicks you … hard. Cons of being a twin”
“I’ve been slapped a few times” Sam said.
“I’m sorry did you say twins?”
“Yeah can you tell?” He joked.
“You know I can definitely see it”
“I don’t mind sleeping on the floor” Josh sighed
“Poor Josh” you said.
“Poor josh? What about the victims” Jake said making the room laugh.
“Well we can figure it out later. I’m not letting you sleep on the floor that’s for sure” you say to him. “Here’s the remote. Turn on whatever you’d like. Also there’s beer and stuff in the fridge” you said going into the kitchen to start on dinner.
Danny got up grabbing enough for everyone. You could definitely tell who the siblings were. As Jake and Sam bickered over the remote. Danny tried to intervene between the two. Which ended with a pissed off sam, and a cocky smirk from Jake.
Josh rolled his eyes, and walked into the kitchen. “Need some help?”
“Oh you don’t have to do all that”
“I don’t mind really” his eyes shifted to the potato’s lying in the countertop. “I could peel those if you needed”
“That would be lovely thank you”
It started out in comfortable silence. Only speaking to confirm he’s doing right. As he watched the sun set from the window his mind began to wonder.
“So” he cleared his throat. “how long have you lived in Colorado?”
“Well I visited when I was 15 fell in love, and I moved when I was 19. Been here ever since, and I wouldn’t change it for the world. You’re from Nashville?”
“Not by choice” he laughed “originally I’m from Michigan, but with the band and all. We had to move closer to the studio and stuff”
“How’s that all going?”
“The band? It’s been a lot to be honest. Rewarding, but exhausting. I’m just glad we’re on a break from tour”
“I don’t know how you do it every night. I can barely work without getting drained”
“You figure it out eventually I suppose. Knife?”
“Top drawer. What’s it’s like traveling the world, and playing to people every night”
“It never gets boring I’ll say that. When you’re up there looking out into the crowd. They love you with all their heart. It’s like they understand you in a sense. You can really feel the love up on that stage. It makes up for the exhaustion I suppose”
“That sounds beautiful. Maybe I’ll get to come to a show one day”
“So what made you invite everyone out here? Gotta be an adjustment from peace and quiet all the time”
“Oh it wasn’t my idea. I’m glad everyone came out though it’s nice to have a change”
“Oh? I was told something different wonder why” he thought it over in his head
“Well now I’m curious what you were told”
“The story was that you invited Hannah, and she invited us”
“She called me” you laughed hard. “That’s a silly thing to lie about”
He knew. He knew exactly why they lied. He knew Jake lied to his face in the car. Now that he’s met you he knows exactly why they’ve brought him here. You. Now he would be lying if his said his heart wasn’t skipping beats right now. Only now that he’s figured it out his nerves are shot.
“Good thing this cooks pretty slow so we can go relax for a while”
He followed you to the couch and hesitantly sat down beside you. His eyes shifted from the movie to picking at his finger, and back to the movie. He had scabs around his fingers from it. You could tell he was on edge a little bit. Something changed since your talk in the kitchen but you didn’t know what. He seemed nervous around you now. Although you couldn’t understand why you knew what might help. “Do you smoke?”
He nodded his head with a smile “me and Josh are gonna smoke if anyone wants to join”
You walked outside and a few of them followed. Passing it in a circle and making small talk. Josh took a drag off the joint and closed his eyes. Blowing it out and nodding his head. “Damn that’s good shit”
“Told you so” you laughed as he handed it to you.
“It’s so pretty out here. Wish I lived in the mountain” Danny said admiring the view.
“I couldn’t imagine living anywhere else” you said. “Shit I left my drink inside be right back”
“Jacob Tomas Kiszka” Josh said stern. “You brought me here to hook me up?”
“I already told you I wouldn’t-”
“I made the mistake of asking her. She said this wasn’t her idea to invite us out. Instead she got a phone call from Hannah”
“Josh listen” he said before Hannah cut him off.
“We were worried about you Josh. She’s in the same situation you are. Give her a chance”
“How did you know? How did you know we would click? Because I’ve never- I’ve never done that with anyone”
“I just knew”
They were quick to end the conversation when you walked back outside. You all stayed outside for a while passing the joint around. They gave you the last hit, and you threw the roach out into the yard. After everyone was done eating dinner the night started to get fun. Everyone had a good buzz going, and the house was lively. Josh started to come out of his shell, talking louder, and with more excitement. “My god you guys are funny” you went into the kitchen to make another drink. Josh followed you also needing a refill.
“Doing alright?” He asked you.
“Haven’t been this messed up in a while” you laughed.
“How are you feeling?”
“I’m almost to your level” he smiled. “I never told you but-”
“Y/n holy shit! You got more weed? I feel fucking great” drunk Sam comes shouting in the kitchen
You laughed “go into my room and there’s like 4 laying on the tv stand” you paused waiting for Sam to leave. “Never told me what?”
“Oh never mind” he waved a hand in the air.
“But-”
“Y/n” Sam came back in tugging at your shirt. “Come smoke with us”
“Fine. Josh you coming?”
“I think I’ll set this one out” he smiled at you.
“Josh is sweet” you said sitting outside with Sam and Hannah.
“Oh he’s a sweetheart” she said.
“I can tell” you put the joint between your lips and lit the tip.
“Single” Sam said and Hannah gently smacked him. “What? It’s true”
“Oh”
“He’s been through a lot relationship wise, but so have you” Hannah said.
“Don’t let him fool you he’s not always that quiet”
“Well neither am I” you laughed “he seems nervous”
“I suppose he is” Sam said taking a hit “he has been just kinda down recently. Plus his ex kinda took his self confidence from him”
“I guess he just gets lonely a lot, and it’s catching up to him” Hannah said.
“I know how that feels” you said pointing to the mountains “it’s just me and my dogs out here”
“It’s got its perks I would assume” Hannah said.
“Oh yeah definitely” you stared for a moment “he’s cute”
“Think so?” Hannah asked excitedly.
“He has kind eyes. I like his hair it’s fluffy. He just seems so nice”
“All I’m gonna say is he’s interested”
Josh sat on the couch with his brother. “Has she said anything to you? About like me or anything?”
Jake laughed “no but I can tell she’s taking a liking to you”
“Oh definitely” Danny chimed in “how do you feel about her?”
“I dunno she just kinda has this glow around her, and I wanna be part of the light”
They looked at each other and started laughing “oh he’s in love Danny”
“She seems perfect for you. Gonna thank me or what?” Jake teased taking a sip from his drink.
“Yeah yeah whatever”
“So what move are you going to make? Let’s get this started right?” Danny asked.
“Yeah you’re funny. I’m done making the moves. If it’s meant to be then it will be”
They both rolled their eyes “well shit”
“Hi” you said slamming open the door. It was obvious by your state that you were pretty messed up. “Joshua. Can I call you Joshua?”
“If you’d like” he turned to look at you. You plopped down beside him on the couch.
“Joshua!” You shouted “I have an idea”
He jumped when you yelled his name. Laughing about how you startled him. “What’s your idea?”
You shuffle through your phone looking for a song. When you found the perfect one you jumped to your feet. “Wanna dance with me?”
He smiled, and he cheeks blushed pink. “I would love to dance with you.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, and his hands held your waist. “oh shit. I’m so sorry I stepped in your toes”
He smiled down at you “don’t worry about it darling”
“Darling? I like that” you laid your head on his chest. He danced you around your living room. By the time it was over almost everyone had joined. It was magical to see your house so lively and full of love.
“You made me dizzy” you giggled and sat down on the couch. Your head laid on his shoulder and you begun to get sleepy. Danny went into action being the dad of the group. Helping Jake as he stumbled into the guest room. He helped Sam blow up the air mattress, and grabbed blankets for everyone. He filled up a glass of water and sat it on Jake’s bedside table. Making sure everyone had a least a little water to drink before bedtime.
“What we gonna do about you?” You turned to Josh. “Want to sleep with me?”
“Good luck sleeping” Danny joked.
“Oh he won’t bother me I’m a deep sleeper. Nothing wakes me up”
“They’re not wrong. I don’t wanna hurt you in your own bed”
“Joshua shut up” Sam whispered.
You laughed at his attempt to help his brother “come on Josh”
“Are you sure I mean I-”
“Josh shut up” Sam and Danny said in unison.
You reached out your hand, and he grabbed it. He headed into the room “you’re room is cute”
“Thank you most the decor is diy or thrifted”
“They look amazing. Did you make this?”
He took interest in the large painting on the wall. You nodded “yes I love to paint”
“That’s so impressive. I love art myself, but I could never make anything like this”. He gently ran his fingers on the edge of the painting.
Your cheeks now bright red, and a soft smile on your lips “thank you Josh. I’m sure you could do better”
“Definitely not. I’m not really a painter. I design my own stage clothes. I sketch what I want it to look like, and then somebody makes it. I like it because it’s always exactly how I want it to be. I take inspiration from all kinds of stuff, and make it into one thing. It’s more than just an outfit really. It’s almost like another person when I put them on”
“Like each outfit is its own art piece? It’s like painting. When you’re in a good mood your art is going to distribute something completely different than if you were gloomy. The paintings are entirely different it’s almost as if different people painted them.”
“That’s exactly it! You understand” he smiles.
“Artists to artists of course I understand”
You let him look around a bit longer before excusing yourself to go change. When you came back he was still looking at the painting. He had pajama pants on with a white sleeved shirt. You tripped over your feet walking into the room. Stumbling around, and your vision was getting blurry. “Stumbling around a little. You okay?”
“Hmm” you reached for his shoulder to stabilize yourself. Without much thought he picked you up. Tucking you into the bed, and lying down beside you.
“If I hurt you or keep you up please wake me up. I don’t mind sleeping on the floor. I just-”
“Shh you’re not gonna bother me. Stop stressing about it. I can tell this is something people might have made you feel bad about”
“Yeah well try hurting the people you love and have no control over it”
A lazy finger pressed against his lip “shh don’t worry about it. Joshua”
You both laid there in silence trying to drift away. The silence was deadly, and you tossed and turned. Unable to fall asleep, and your mind raced about the man next to you. In a whisper you spoke “Josh”
Sleepy he replied “yes?”
“Can you hold me?”
“I would love nothing more”
When the sun started to rise you two were the last ones awake. Jake crept open the door worried you might have ended up on the floor. Instead he found you tangled up together. The sheets hanging off the bed, and he was holding you protectively.
“Sam come here … look” Jake said pointing at the two of you.
He poked his head through the door “awe they look so cozy”
“I wonder how long they’ve been like that”
“All he needed was a cuddle buddy I guess” Sam said.
You started to stir as the sun shined through the curtains. “Shit” they giggled and shut the door.
Josh’s eyes peeked opened to you lying across him. He closed his eyes for a moment taking it in. You were you wrapped around him tightly. One leg hiked across his waist, and the other twisted in his leg. Your arm laid across his chest, and so was your head. He was loving every minute of you. Wishing this moment would never end. However, you started to wake up. His grip was strong hopeful you wouldn’t move. You looked up at him and smiled. “Good morning”
“Good morning. Sleep okay?” He asked.
“I slept amazing. You?”
“Best sleep I’ve got in a while”
“Your so warm that’s probably why I slept so good. It’s usually freezing in here. I wasn’t all over you too much right?”
“Not too much at all. Been a while since well you know”
“Feels nice to be held. What happened to the sheets?”
“Not sure about that one”
His eyes were glowing, and his face had a smile you haven’t seen before. Dosing off a little bit with the warmth of his body. You’ve never felt so comfortable in your life. The sheets felt like honey on your skin. You wondered if you found heaven, or at least peace. You two laid tangled up together for at least an hour. Realizing the time you sighed, and climbed out of your side of heaven. The two of you stumbled into the living room. “Well good morning love bugs” Sam teased which resulted in another playful smack from his girl. “Leave them alone” she whispered.
“Checked for bruises?” Danny said.
“I don’t think he moved one bit. Except the kick the sheets off. Or maybe that was me” you shrugged your shoulders.
“Maybe all he needed was someone to hold” Jake said.
His face turned bright red and his eyes got big “oh my god shut up. How did you know that?”
“I have my ways”
“Creep” Josh rolled his eyes.
You giggled at him, and walked into the kitchen. You opened the container of coffee grounds and put it into the maker. Making a pot then going to your bedroom to get dressed. Jake and Josh were talking in the kitchen as they drank their coffee.
“So” he paused taking a sip “seems to be going well”
“Last night was the first night I didn’t wake up in the middle of the night”
“Is that why you’ve been up doing fuck knows what?”
“Yeah I’d wake up at like three in the morning and I could never go back to sleep. So I’d get up and start doing stuff”
“You’ve scared the shit out of me when I walk downstairs to get water, and you’re standing in the kitchen. You really gotta go back home bud”
“I know I know. Hey maybe I won’t have too” he joked.
“Gonna become a mountain man?”
Josh talks with his hands that’s very obvious. What he doesn’t do is pay attention to where his hands fly around. The conversation has peeked his interest, and when his hands flare out he hits the open container. Coffee grounds go everywhere. Josh’s face turns white, and he starts to panic.
“Oh fuck” he repeated over and over. “Here we go. It was going so good, and I’ve fucked it all up”
“Josh it’s just coffee grounds I’m sure she’ll understand it was an accident”
“You don’t understand Jake. Do you not fucking remember?”
“I remember, but she nothing like her. She won’t get mad I’m sure of it”
“I’ve ruined everything. Why am I like this Jake?”
“You haven’t done anything wrong. Josh you’ve been the best I’ve seen you in so long. Let’s not lose progress over coffee grounds …. Josh”
Still he panicked, hyperventilating, going into his head and -
“Josh how fucking stupid are you?”
“I’m sorry it was an accident I’ll pick it up”
“I just fucking poured that drink. You are fucking useless”
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to. I’ll clean it up”
“Why am I even with you? Your so damn pathetic”
“It was just an accident”
“Shut the hell up and pick it up. I don’t need to hear your whining”
“I’m trying but your yelling at me”
“Are you gonna fucking cry about it? Go ahead cry see if I give a shit Josh”
“Josh!”
“Huh?”
“Did you hear me? She’s gonna get the broom for us”
“You told her? Why would you do that? We could of figured it out”
“Josh breathe. Take a damn breath. I’m gonna say it again she’s isn’t like her”
“Oh no what happened?” you said walking into the kitchen.
“I’m so sorry it was an accident I’ll clean it up”
“Oh no worries. Shit happens” you waved a hand in the air.
“I’m so sorry I-” his fingers ran through his hair. Processing your response he looked at you confused “Wait what did you say?” he said softly.
“I said shit happens. I’d be a fool to get mad over something so small. Go sit down I’ve got it”
He looked at his brother confused. “You’re not mad? Why aren’t you mad? I spilled this everywhere”
“Don’t beat yourself up. I’m clumsy as hell. Always spilling stuff. Go sit down” you handed him his coffee cup “here. Go take a breath”
Josh exited the room, and you turned to Jake for some answers. “Jake” you whispered.
“What’s up?” He grabbed the broom as you held the dust pan.
“Is he okay? Why did he get so upset?”
He swept the grounds into the dust pan. His face shifted to an almost confused look. Then you thought maybe it was an angry one. But his eyes looked hurt, and watched him quietly.
He sighed “his ex is a horrible person. She treated him like shit, and made him feel bad when he made a mistake. I don’t know everything, but I know she did get physical sometimes”
“That’s horrible he doesn’t deserve that”
“No he doesn’t. There was a trip we were on and he spilled her drink on accident. She cussed him out, and called him all these names. He was cleaning it up and she kicked him with her boot. I got a little rough shoving her away from him, but it should have never happened. He stayed and I don’t know why. I think he was afraid to leave her. It was like an intervention I swear. We all sat with him and told him he deserved better, and we helped him break it off”
“But he’s so sweet how could anyone treat him that way? I want to fix this”
He sighed again, and you could tell something was weighing on him “can I tell you the truth?”
You nodded, and he spoke “your the reason we’re here. We thought maybe you two would hit it off. We were worried for him … very worried. Josh has always been the most outgoing person, and it hurt watching him fade. Hannah said that you were single, and it was just a hunch. We just wanted to help him. I’m sorry I don’t want to pressure you”
“So that’s why everyone lied to him” now it made sense. “I don’t click with people. There’s never been a person I felt instantly connected too. Except yesterday when I laid eyes on Josh. It’s been a day, but I’m glad you brought him here. We’re both wounded, and because of that I think we can heal each other. Thank you Jake”
You decided to put there plan in motion. You got up to find Josh “Hey follow me”
You went out the gate and started walking down a rocky path. He didn’t ask where you were taking him nor did he care. He watched as the dogs switched between walking beside you to scanning the area ahead. You never minded the dogs running off when on your walks. You got closer to the mountains and Josh’s eyes began to glow. You hiked down to the river. A deep spot that nearly looked like a pond. The mountain ran above it making the spot secluded. “Look at this place. It’s breathtaking”
“It never fails to impress me. The waters cold I don’t usually get to swim. I just come here to relax”
He reached his hands in the water “I mean it’s not that cold”
“Wanna get in then tough guy?”
He reached to remove his shirt “wait!”. You took off running and he ran after you.
You made it to the top of the smallest cliff. “Your kidding me right?”
“What? Are you scared?” You teased him.
“Maybe a little. Sure it’s deep enough?”
Rolling your eyes at him you asked “do you trust me?”
“I do”
You took your shirt off revealing a lacy white bra, and panties to match. He looked away quickly, but his face already turned red. “It’s okay” you giggled
“Sorry” he said with his eyes glued to the ground.
“Don’t be. Human nature ya know. You’re turn”
He removed his shirt, and stripped down to his boxers. You placed your hands on his shoulders grabbing his attention “Listen whatever we went through let’s try to move past it. I’ve been scared too Josh. For two years I was afraid of any interaction with a man. I could barely go places by myself”
“What happened? Only if your comfortable to answer”
“Started at a party my drink got spiked. I don’t remember anything or if anything happened to me. I thought it was because he like me so I started dating him. He would hurt me often. I thought it was normal, and I convinced myself he loved me. The cycle continued until my friends got me help. It was relationship after relationship, and it was all the same. That’s what I thought I deserved I suppose. I’m still in therapy and I continue to get better every day”
“I guess it was my first serious relationship. Or so I thought, but I meant nothing to her. I never dated much in high school. All she did was yell at me. I couldn’t spend enough on her. It was never enough. She would hit me and it’s not that it hurt that bad. It hurt more knowing she wanted to harm me. I loved her, and she wanted nothing more than to hurt me. My brothers got me away from her thank goodness. I’m also in therapy I never thought it would help, but it has. And I know I’m so awkward, but it’s almost as if I don’t know how to act. No one’s ever been as gentle with me as you are”
“We will heal together. This jump is us letting go”
You reach out your hand, and counted down. With no hesitation he jumped with you. Falling farther than he thought, and his body rushed with adrenaline. You both hit the cold water, and gasp coming back up. He slicked his hair back, and tried to catch his breath. “I take it back this water is freezing”
“That was so fun Josh” you shouted holding his shoulders. “Oh my god I feel so alive. Do you feel it Josh?”
He nodded his head and wrapped his arms around your waist. You threw your arms on his neck. “Yeah I feel it”
You held on to him tight, feeling his heart beat against yours. You stayed in the water far too long in this cool weather. You just couldn’t make yourself let go. You put your forehead against his. “Can I kiss you?”
He smiled softly “I would love that”
You leaned in placing your lips to his. Your body felt warm for a minute. Like a shock of electricity ran through your veins. Your lips moved against him. You let the last kiss drag out before you pulled back “I cant feel my toes”
“I can’t feel a lot of things” he said, and you busted out laughing. You hiked back up to the top to grab your clothes and headed towards the house. You were shivering and your teeth were chattering. When you arrived back at the house you couldn’t feel a thing. Everyone was sitting outside, and their neck snapped around to look at you two.
“What the hell happened to you guys?” Jake asked
“Oh you know we just jumped off a cliff. No biggie” Josh teased.
“We left you two alone for an hour and you jump off a cliff” he laughed.
“I’m gonna go change, and start the fire” you kissed his cheek.
Causing everyone’s jaws to drop. “Did she just-?”
Everyone gasped excitedly, and Josh just seemed to glow. He nodded his head proudly, and started to tell the story. His hands were flying everywhere as he spoke in detail.
“Hot chocolates on the stove, and the fire has been started”
“Actually that sounds quite nice” Jake said.
As the temperature dropped everyone piled in the house. Laying around the living room with hot chocolate in hand. A cozy movie playing, and the lights turned down.
You turned off the stove, and stepped into the living room. Looking around the room seeing everyone so content. You just smiled wishing it could be like this forever. He noticed your giddy smile “Come here love”
You cuddled up beside him, and he threw the blanket over you two. The house was warm, and everyone was completely relaxed. You felt as if you were melting into Josh. You thought this might be the most comfortable you’ve ever been. Your eyes started to get heavy, and before you knew it sleep had taken over.
You feared for the end of this week. Knowing it was coming soon. He would leave and go back to his busy life. You would be here like you always are. For now his fingers ran through your hair, and his lips kissed your forehead. He couldn’t quit place the feeling he was feeling, but he knew one thing.
He was home.
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gretavangroupie · 6 months ago
Text
G13 - Finish What Ya Started
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Spinning Now: "Finish What Ya Started" by Van Halen (1988)
Pairing: Josh x Female Reader
Word Count: 8.2k
Description: You and Josh, your favorite new co worker, decide to share more than drinks as what started as a normal night turns into something you never expected.
Warnings: Smoking, Drinking, Cursing, Drug Use, Heavy Flirting, Praise, Dirty Talk, Touching, Mention of Breakups and Heartbreak, Sadness. Smut: Kissing, Oral M!Receiving
New town, new job, new life. 
That’s always how things went in the movies, and every time, the girl always got her happy ending.
How hard can it be, right?
After you’d managed to knock the first new off your list when you moved out of your ex’s house and to the next city over, the “job” part was next in line. After a week of filling out applications, you finally landed on the perfect selection, a serving job at Angelo’s Pizza.
You’d started this new job about about three months ago, and you finally felt like you were getting your footing with the flow of things. You’d been a server for as long as you could remember, but getting used to a new restaurant with new people and new menus and management could sometimes prove to be difficult. You were handling it with as much grace as you could, and the money was killer, so you stuck it out.
“You coming to the bar with me tonight?” your new favorite coworker, Josh asked as he stared into the kitchen from the expo window, rolling a pile of coasters across the countertop. 
“Mmmh…” You mumbled under your breath. “I dunno, I’ve been here since lunch and my feet are absolutely killing me.”
”Ugh don’t be such a prude, Y/N.” He responded, taking a pepperoni and cheese in one hand, and a supreme in the other. “We’ll be sitting down the whole time. Ya know. In barstools.”
“Shut the fuck up.” You teased, elbowing him in the ribs. “I guess so, but I can’t stay out late like last weekend. I open tomorrow.”
“Oooo, a clopen. That sucks. Well, I don’t. So I can get drunk, and you can watch me.” He flashed you a giant smile before taking off with the pizzas in hand, disappearing into the sea of people seated in the restaurant.
Josh had befriended you on your very first day, comforting you after your manager harshly scolded you for ringing something in incorrectly. 
“Don’t worry about it.” He’d said as you pouted in the walk-in. “I still fuck my shit up all the time. The cooks don’t really care, plus if you mess somethin’ up, we get to eat the fucked up pizza.” That was the only thing he said to you the entire day, but it really stuck with you, immediately making you feel a lot better about your tiny mistake. 
Now, after a few months of working side by side with Josh, you’d actually gotten to know each other fairly well, and you’d even go as far as calling him one of your good friends. You’d managed to get to know all your coworkers on a surface level, but Josh actually took the time to listen to you when you spoke, and showed real interest in the things you had to say, no matter how menial. 
He was cute, and around the same age as you, but there was something about Josh that you couldn’t put your finger on. It was something that struck you, making him stand out from the rest of the guys you worked with. His aura pulled you in, and the way his eyes sparkled in the neon that covered the walls of the restaurant didn’t help the fact that he sometimes made your heart skip a beat. You decided that it was just his looks, though, catching you off guard every once in a while as you were around him more. Most importantly, he made you feel welcome. Like a good friend should. 
The more you got to know Josh, the more open he became with you, and you quickly learned that his real personality outside of work was a little bit different than when you were on the clock. It’d become almost a habit, now, joining Josh at his favorite dive bar down the street when you’d both end up on the same closing schedule. It was like Groundhog Day, Josh would ask you to come out, you’d find an excuse to turn him down, but you always left Angelo’s with your hand in his as you tiredly dragged yourselves down the street. Sometimes other coworkers would join you, but it was always the two of you left shutting the bar down, joking and laughing with one another as you waited for your Ubers.
Josh was quickly becoming a norm for you. A fun, platonic norm. And though you were both flirty with one another, it never felt as though it would go past anything but that. Just friends. And you were very content with that. 
So tonight, as things wound down and the patrons closed out their tabs, you felt as if you really could use a nightcap or two to reward yourself for not making even one mistake on your orders today.
As you tied the oversized trash bag closed, you met eyes with Josh as he skillfully swiped the mop across the sticky, sauce-covered floor. 
He grinned when he saw you looking, making your stomach drop. “What?” He asked, biting his lower lip in as he staved off a full-on smile.
“Nothing. Just thinking about how you roped me into going out again tonight.” You said with faux aggravation.
Josh sucked in his teeth as he plopped the mop back into the big yellow bucket, rolling it over to where you stood. “Actually, I asked you out with me tonight for another reason. I wasn’t kidding when I said I was gonna get absolutely shit hammered, tonight.” His tone was serious rather than silly, and you instantly felt like something was wrong.
“What’s the other reason?” You pressed, lifting the bag from the can. “Everything okay?”
He shook his head and swallowed, opening the double doors to the kitchen to go and dump his bucket. You followed closely behind him with your trash. 
“Eh, not really. I’ll tell you all about it when we get there. Let’s lock this bitch up.” He flashed his eyes to the floor as he spoke, which was unlike him. He always spoke with such confidence and effortless ease. 
The two of you finished up your closing tasks and said goodnight to the line cooks, grabbing up your things from your lockers and stuffing your aprons back inside. Josh was quiet the whole time, again striking you as out of the ordinary. You hadn’t known Josh long, but you did know him well enough to know that something was off, and he wasn’t handling it well.
“Think I’m going straight for liquor tonight.” He said as you walked arm in arm down the crowded sidewalk to the bar. He tilted his head back, blowing a puff of air above you, watching as the cold air turned it into steam. 
“Damn.” You answered. “You must really be going through it, friend.” It was also unlike Josh to drink liquor; each time you were around him, he’d always chosen draft beer. 
You both stepped inside the dimly-lit dive bar, letting the heat warm your chilly bones from the cold autumn air. You both took up camp on two stools at the end of the bar, closest to the back wall. The bartender Roy approached you, throwing down two bar napkins in front of you as you got comfortable in your seats. 
“Evenin’, guys. Sex on the Beach andddd, Josh, we’ve got a Kolsch and a pale ale on tap, and also a—“
“Jack Daniel’s. Neat, please.” Josh interrupted Roy, causing him to contort his face with surprise. 
“Been waiting on you almost five years and never known you to drink liquor. But, alright…” Roy responded as he left for a minute, returning and placing your drinks in front of you. “I’ll keep the tab goin’.”
It was silent between the two of you for the first couple of minutes, both of you sipping your drinks as you relaxed your muscles from the long workday. Finally, you decided you would have to be the one to speak first, for once. 
“Okay, spill. What’s got you on the hard stuff tonight?” You asked, turning to face Josh in your stool. 
He leaned on his elbow, his tight black t-shirt squeezing his toned arm just right. “I got dumped last night.” 
You felt your eyebrows jump to your forehead. “What?! Oh my god, I’m so sorry, Josh…I didn’t even know you had a—“
“Nah, it’s okay. I could kinda tell shit was going sideways, anyway, ya know? Almost expected it. But, still doesn’t make it hurt any less.” He disconnected his eye contact, tilting his glass back all the way and finishing off the last bit of his whiskey. 
You were almost stunned speechless. You hadn’t seen Josh show any emotion that even came close to sadness before, and you struggled with how you were going to react. 
Roy brought the bottle of Jack over, filling Josh’s glass with another two fingers. 
“How long were you together?” You asked, tiptoeing with caution, given that he might not want to go into much detail. 
“Four and a half years.” He said blankly. 
“My god, are you serious?!” You choked out with disbelief. 
He nodded hard as he kept his eyes trained on the bar in front of you, spinning his stool in tiny tight circles. “Yeah. Long time.” He sipped his drink again. 
“I really am sorry, Josh. That’s a long time to be with someone for it to just...” You placed a hand on his arm as you spoke. 
He crossed his arms in front of him. “Yeah, it’s fucked.” He growled, leaning back in his stool. 
“You wanna talk about it?” You asked. 
“No, that’s why we’re here.” He slammed his hands on the bar top, motioning for Roy to refill your already almost empty cocktail. 
Roy brought your new drink over, stirring the drink with the tiny straw for you. Josh lifted his glass into the air, forcefully clinking it against yours. “To moving on!” He said, finishing the drink off once again. 
——
An hour or so later, you and Josh had managed to find yourselves significantly intoxicated once again, engaged in a deep passionate debate. 
“Ever since they banned smoking indoors, the American bar scene has been fucked!” Josh drunkenly yelled overtop of the loud music and large crowd that had joined you inside the bar. 
You had to laugh. “Josh, not everybody loves breathing that shit in! It makes some people really sick!” You challenged. 
“Ah, hell. You come into a bar, you expect to be around smoke, all there is to it. All there is to it!” He crossed his arms and shrugged his shoulders in defiance of your argument. 
“You can go outside and smoke, Josh. Easy as that. Just get over it!” The two of you were glassy-eyed and giggly, feeling your liquor take hold of you as you talked. Josh brought about a warmth in you that you’d never experienced before, and you’d be lying if you said your…attraction? to him wasn’t amplified when you were drunk. 
No, not attraction. 
Something else…
You had no idea what to label the feeling, because you’d never felt it ever before. You took it in stride, though, embracing the completely new emotion as it came. It was almost like you craved his attention, and fed off of him engaging with you. You wanted to please him, but not in such a way that was sexual. 
…You didn’t think. 
No. You just craved his recognition. Wanted his eyes on you and no one else. Wanted to make him laugh, be the one who made him forget about everything else. It wasn’t a jealousy thing, it was a matter of possessiveness. You wanted to protect him like a best friend. And anyone who dared cause him unhappiness would have to deal with you. 
Is this insane thinking?! Am I crazy for this? You drunkenly asked yourself as you washed your hands in the bar bathroom sink, giving yourself a disapproving look in the mirror. Probably, maybe…but he seems to feel the same about you... You had noticed that the second you’d inadvertently struck up a conversation with another guy at the bar, Josh quickly stole your attention away again, bringing up a whole new topic of conversation that had nothing to do with the last. 
He charmed you. Drew you in. Challenged your thoughts and opinions…made you talk like you’d never talked before. Laugh like you’d never laughed. 
“You’re really smart, Y/N. I didn’t really notice that about you, before.” Josh smiled as he leaned over toward you on the bar. His cheeks were tinted the prettiest pink from the alcohol. 
“Uhh, thanks, I guess?” You chortled, feigning being offended. 
“No I mean, you surprise me. Keep me guessing, every time I turn around. Never had a friend like that before. I’m usually so bored with everyone I meet. You make me like, think. Ya know?” He explained as you nodded sweetly in understanding. You knew you were blushing. 
“Last call!!” You heard Roy yell across the still-crowded room. You made blurry eye contact with Josh again. 
“Damn, we didddit agin.” You stammered. “Let me pay, you’ve had a hard couple’a days.” 
“No no no, no you don’t. I asked you here, my treat. Plus, my drinks were fuckin’ pricey tonight.”
“But Josh, let me treat you, for once...” You jutted your bottom lip out as you begged him. You watched as his eyes landed on your lips, stealing his attention again. Suddenly, you felt excited. 
“Alright, alright. But I’m leavin’ the tip.” He agreed. “I just needed some sympathy…that’s all I wanted tonight.”
“And you got it, didn’t you? You forgot all about your messy breakup?”
“For the most part, yes.” He laughed. “But I like to look at the long run, ya know? Like to take each step, one by one. Let myself live in the sadness.”
You scoffed as you signed your name on the receipt and pulled your coat on. “Psh, Josh, didn’t you just cheers me and say ‘to moving on’?”
He stood from his stool, wrapping his arm around your neck tightly. The smell of his cologne mixed with the remnants of pizza filled your senses, temporarily making you dizzy as he squeezed you in his grip. 
“I did, Y/N, I did. But I’m also drunk, now. So. And also, I don’t really wanna go home yet. ‘M gonna walk you to your Uber then hit up Chauncey’s…they stay open ‘til 2.”
You turned in his grasp, your face within inches of his as he held you tightly. “Don’t go back out, Josh. No sense in drinkin’ your sorrows away by yourself.” It felt like you were outside of your own body; all you wanted was to go home and strip down and crawl into bed, but for some reason, your mouth told Josh that apparently you didn’t want to go home, either. “Come back to my place. We’ll have one more drink, and we can share the blunt that TJ gave me yesterday.”
“TJ? The linecook?” Josh seemed surprised. “You letting strangers give you drugs now, Y/N?”
“He’s hardly a stranger, Josh. Why, you jealous?” You teased, while also testing the waters of what the hell this feeling the two of you apparently shared could actually be. 
“Fuck no, I’m not jealous. I’m…I…” Josh opened his mouth, but nothing came out after that. “I don’t know, I just—“ You were still tightly wrapped up in the crook of his elbow, his face so close to yours that you could smell the liquor on his breath as he struggled to speak. 
You decided to save him. “It’s alright Josh. You don’t have to come over. I’ll smoke it allllll by myself…” you sneakily wrapped your arm around his back, giving it a couple playful pats. 
He looked down at you through his lashes, his jaw clenched tightly together. “You really want me to come over?”
You nodded. “I do. Come on, it’ll be fun.” More than anything, you wanted him to know you were the reason he had such a good night, and the reason he was able to forget about his breakup.
“Okay, jackass. You talked me into it. Let’s go get high.” He released you from his grasp as you confirmed your Uber on your phone, and your overwhelming satisfaction of claiming his attention again propelled you out the door. 
——
“Cute place. You decorate it yourself?” Josh teased as you both entered your apartment. It was only half-decorated and you hardly had any furniture, spending most of your days working and saving up money to finish furnishing it. 
“Shut up, dick head!” You shoved him backwards as he laughed. “I haven’t finished making it cute yet.” You pulled the bottle of liquor from the cabinet, shaking the little bit that was left. “I know you’ve been drinking whiskey, but…vodka’s all I’ve got.”
“Ah, it’ll work.” Josh responded, plopping down on your couch. “M’already fucked with a hangover tomorrow, might as well do it up.” You caught sight of his pretty light brown curls sitting on top of his head, and you felt another rush of that strange excitement soar through you. 
You made the two drinks and joined him on the couch, pulling the blunt up under your nose as you breathed in its earthy scent. Josh took the drink from your hand, raising his eyebrows as he watched you smell the rolled marijuana. 
“TJ usually has good shit, I will say.” He winked, sipping his drink. 
You pulled your feet up underneath you on the couch, scooting yourself closer to him. “Thought you said I shouldn’t take drugs from strangers…”
“I never said you shouldn’t, I just meant that next time you should get your weed from me.” He spoke without a care, taking the blunt from your hand and bringing it to his own nose. 
“Ah, well I was unaware I could do that, Joshua.” You snatched it back from him, taking the lighter from the table in front of you and lighting the end of the blunt. You inhaled the smoke slowly, noticing that Josh hadn’t responded to you. 
You glanced at him, finding the most devastating half smile on his face. You swore you felt your skin tingle. 
“Did you just call me by my government name, Y/N?” He whispered, leaning his head down to you. 
You exhaled the smoke you didn’t realize you were holding, nodding slowly. “Yeah, you mad about it?”
You passed him the blunt. “Nah, kinda liked the way it sounded, actually.” You watched as his lips made a perfect O around the tip of the blunt, and you found yourself wondering what kind of chapstick he used to get them to look…like that…
You felt your eyes grow heavy as your first hit found you, the THC entering your system quickly. Josh must have noticed, as he giggled at your appearance. “Told you TJ had good shit.”
“I swear to god I’m already fuckin’ high…” you laughed, taking another big hit. 
“Mmm, no baby, you’re crossed. But not all the way. Yet.” Josh’s voice was gritty and buttery all at the same time. And the fact that he called you baby had you feeling that same feeling again. He calls everybody baby, though…all the girls at work…you’re not special. 
The two of you sat and smoked until the blunt was a roach, and the air around you was thick with haziness. Your entire body was heavy and floaty, and you swore you could feel the blood pumping through your extremities. The conversation with Josh was so easy, so effortless, and the way the two of you held the complete attention of one another continued to astound you. 
“So tell me about you. What’s your real story?” Josh asked, the both of you sitting facing one another completely, now. 
You sipped your vodka drink. “What do you mean, real story?”
“I only know a little bit about you, where did you come from? What’s in your past?”
You took a deep breath. “Well, believe it or not, Josh, I kinda just got broken up with recently, too.”
“No way, you’re kidding. When? What happened?” He pressed. 
“Ahh, about a month before I started at Angelo’s. I’m from about twenty miles away, up north a bit. Came here looking to start completely fresh. Still close enough to my family, if I need them. Ya know…” you trailed off. Josh’s eyes were telling you to continue. 
“I got dumped, too. After a year of being with him. I thought we were serious, but apparently not. It didn’t hurt me too bad, I’m alright. Liking my new life pretty well, actually.”
Josh dramatically leaned back on the couch cushion, throwing his free hand over his face. “Ugh, god…how embarrassing. You handled bein’ dumped like a goddamned rockstar. I’m over here down in the dumps.”
You couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s okay, Josh. Four and a half years is a lot longer than one…”
“You’re right, I guess.” He sat back up, bringing his attention back to you. “So what was his reason? What was his last straw?” He asked, moving his face closer to yours. Your body was vibrating from the alcohol and the weed, and the presence of Josh sitting so close to you on your couch. You were positively buzzing. 
“He uh, didn’t really give me one. Just said it was over.” You whispered, feeling your emotions flying all over the place. Josh’s hand reached up, twirling a piece of your hair between his fingers. “He also said I was a bad kisser, or something stupid.”
Josh winced at your words. “A bad kisser? I highly doubt that, Y/N…” 
“And why do you doubt that?” You giggled. 
“Because. I have a hard time taking my eyes off your lips, I can only imagine how hard it would be to take my lips off of them…” he smirked a little, laughing through his nose. 
“You’re fuckin’ stoned.” You laughed, leaning your face onto his hand. 
“And? I speak nothing but the truth, baby.”
“Mmmhm, yeah. Shut up.” You complained. 
“I’m serious. I bet you really are a good kisser. That guy was just…stupid.”
“Maybe I’m a horrible kisser, how would I ever know?” You shrugged, feeling your body about to jump out of your skin simply from having this conversation with Josh. 
He held his first two fingers up, motioning for you to come here. “Come on. Show me how you like to kiss.” 
“What?! No, I’m not gonna do that.” You blushed, pulling away from him with shyness. 
“Baby, it’s me. I’m just trying to judge your kissing skills. I’ll be completely honest with you, tell you if that guy was right or not.” Josh said, holding his hands out to the sides. 
You stopped, staring at Josh through your slit eyelids, trying to figure him out. He met you with sincere eyes, and though you were both extremely intoxicated, you didn’t feel uncomfortable in the least. 
“I’m serious. Just kiss me.” He said matter of factly. “S’no big deal.” 
You took a deep breath, feeling the air surrounding you heavy with normalcy, but also heavy with yearning. 
You slowly pulled yourself in closer to him, gently wetting your lips as your mind went back and forth on whether or not to do this. Your breath became a little chopped, nerves bursting through the wall of your drunken carelessness. 
Finally you were close enough to feel his breath on your lips, and your hands naturally shot up to cup his jaw. He clenched it, his eyes falling heavy again as his breath caught. Your heart was absolutely pounding from your chest. 
“Do it.” He whispered. “Show me.”
You finally let your lips press gently to his, your hands still cupping his jaw, as his hands sat comfortably in his lap. The feeling of them was exactly what you had imagined, soft, supple, and sweet, with the tiniest bit of sting on them from the leftover liquor. You finally exhaled, pulling away a bit to gauge his reaction. 
“You can get into it, baby.” He smiled, urging you to push through your nerves. “I’m just here to help, s’just me…” his voice was like honey, the sound of it tearing through your body as he motivated you. 
You leaned in again, this time letting yourself be a little more brazen, a little more steadfast as you worked to prove your ex wrong. Worked to impress Josh. Worked to show him. You opened your mouth a little, letting your tongue skirt across his bottom lip. The flavor of him almost knocked you down. 
You began to get into it some more, letting your high take over, and letting your guard down as you found yourself really, really enjoying kissing him. You perched up a little bit moving to your knees to get a better stance. 
“Mmmhmm… keep goin’ baby…” Josh mumbled when you broke away for a second. His words urged you on, and you felt brave enough to push your tongue further into his mouth, but only a little. You didn’t want to overwhelm, just experiment. His tongue met yours in the process, tasting each other for the very first time. 
Your hands curled up in his hair, squeezing at the roots a bit. He let out a little whine, so quiet that you almost didn’t even hear it. It ignited something inside you again, and you knew you had to drive it home. Had to prove yourself. You pulled away for a second, hissing in air as you bit his bottom lip, pulling it out a little and making eye contact before pressing into him again, both of you moving in such unison that you were fully involved in the sultry kiss, now. 
At this point you felt like you were teetering on the thin line of platonic kissing; you were still trying to prove yourself, but also…he tasted so good…
You felt the need to be touched. You reached down and grabbed Josh’s wrists, pulling them up to rest on you- one hand on your thigh, and the other around the back of your neck. You wanted reciprocation. He obliged, and as you licked into his mouth, his hand squeezed into your thigh, strong and needing. His fingers felt like burning embers on your leg, and you wished that you had changed into shorts when you got home. 
His hand pulled at the back of your neck, burying your mouths further into one another. “Fuck, baby…he was wrong, you proved him so wrong…” Josh said, smiling against your lips as he delved back in. Your mind was swimming from his words of praise, and you decided that though this was simply an act between friends, you knew that you could kiss him all day long, never tiring of the feeling of his lips on yours. You were completely surrounded by him, by his warming presence. His scent, his sounds, his touch… It was all too much. You felt like you were drowning in him, but you didn’t dare try to pull yourself from his waters. 
Your hands squeezed at his hair one last time as you let them drift down his cheeks and neck, tickling the back of his neck before rolling across his shoulders. You slowly brought them down to his pecs, and finally rested them on his cheeks again, pulling his face away from yours for a split second before landing one last peck. 
When you finally disconnected, you took in the sight of him…hair disheveled, eyes black and glazed, and his hands still rested gently in the places that you put them. 
“Holy fuck…” he breathed. 
“Oh my god, was it bad? It was bad, wasn’t it? He was right, I’m a horrible kis—“ you were completely cut off by Josh’s lips on yours again, this time forcefully pulling you into him. This kiss was pleading, unbridled, and wanting, and each time you pulled away, you both were panting with want. 
“What the fuck are we doing?” You breathed when you broke away. 
“Kissing contest.” He answered, his hand respectfully staying on the back of your neck. “I think I’m winning, though…” 
“Mmm, I don’t know about that…” you said with a bit more confidence in yourself after seeing how you made him feel. 
“Yeah you’re right.” He agreed through an inhale. “You’re kicking my ass at this experiment.” He drove his tongue into your mouth again, but it didn’t make you want to retract…it made you want to pull it in further. You began to feel the heat that the two of you were emanating, and the sweat that was forming on your skin. 
You’d be lying if you said you weren’t completely turned on, but you would never let him know that. You couldn’t. You’re just friends. One friend helping another get over his ex by having a kissing contest. Makes total sense. 
Finally you pulled away again, covering your mouth with your hand. You laughed, making Josh in turn laugh with you. “Well? What’s the verdict? Was he right?” You asked. 
“Fuck no, he wasn’t right. You’re a hell of a kisser, Y/N.” Josh’s smile stretched all the way across his face, completely blissed out in his high. “God damn, you left me a panting mess, baby.”
Your heart stopped at his words, feeling more confidence in yourself than you’d felt in a long, long time. Suddenly, the wildest idea to ever come across your mind escaped right through your lips. 
“Josh, we’re just good friends, right?” You asked. 
“Yeah, baby. Real good friends.” He wiped his hand across his mouth before extending both arms across the back of your couch. 
“Do you—do you care if I finish what I started?” You asked in an absolute moment of weakness. The look on his face turned up into surprise, and you weren’t sure how he was going to react to your question. 
“What uh, what do you mean, Y/N?” 
You moved toward him again, wanting to feel him again. Feel his hands on you again. Be the center of all his attention again. 
“Can you judge something else for me, Josh? I’ve always wondered how well I…performed…and who better to be the judge than my very good friend? Who will be completely honest with me?” 
WHO even are you?! You felt like a person outside your own body. The confidence he was giving you was…
“This ain’t no way to treat the broken-hearted, baby…” he replied, his voice a soft breath of air as his head lulled backwards. You paused again, unsure how to take him. “But I’ll be your judge…”
“Really? You will?” You asked, feeling vulnerable, but also wanting to show out for him. 
“Mhm. If that’s what you really want…” He bit his lower lip into his mouth, letting his eyes fall onto your lips like they had been doing all night. 
“Just friends…” you reiterated. 
“Just friends.” He parroted, lightly tapping your cheek with his hand. 
This was absolutely something you never did, and definitely wasn’t something you could ever even see yourself doing with Josh, of all people. You were supposed to be making him forget about his ex, letting him talk through it… hell, he was just dumped twenty-four hours ago. But there was something other-worldly spurring you on, whispering in your ear to just do it. And he was letting you. Was it wrong? Maybe, probably… but honestly, where was the harm in it? You were both obviously into each other, and as long as you were just making each other happy, you didn’t see anything wrong with it.
Besides, this new need to make him think about nothing but you at every single second was making your head spin, and you wanted his focus completely on you, right now. You moved to press your lips to his again, letting things naturally heat up so that you could continue on with your intentions. You took a deep breath, confidently removing yourself, and placing yourself in the floor in front of him. It was at this second that you were extremely thankful for your liquid courage, and the fact that you were too stoned to care about much else besides pleasing Josh. He almost made it easy. 
“Ten.” Josh said out of nowhere. 
“What?” you asked. 
“I give your kissing a ten out of ten. Seriously.” He said, smiling from the corner of his mouth as he ran his hand along your arm, peering down at you as you kneeled on the floor. 
You felt your face turn beet red, and you halfway didn’t really believe him. 
“Stop playing, you don’t have to be nice.” You erred.
“M’not just being nice. Seriously, I rate it a ten.” He stated, and you knew by the sincerity in his voice that he was telling the truth.
“Wow. Didn’t expect that, honestly.” you pulled a few strands of hair behind your ear. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Now, you gonna finish what ya started, or not?” There was a darkness in his tone that you hadn’t noticed yet, and it made your stomach turn over with nerves. But even more so, it lit a fuse in your chest that was slowly burning, ready to explode at any given second. And with each passing minute, you wanted to impress him even more. 
You maneuvered yourself on your knees, gripping his thighs and pulling them apart so that you could place yourself between them. Your hands stayed there on his legs, squeezing and kneading at his muscles as you moved your hands closer and closer to where you both really wanted them to be. You could almost physically see him getting harder through his dark jeans, and you could hear his breathing picking up, too. 
You let your hands drift to his groin, squeezing the muscles there as he leaned down in his seat, giving you extra space as his head fell back on the cushions. You found the button on his jeans, pulling the fabric sideways and undoing the button with one hand and unzipping the zipper. “Damn, alright…” Josh laughed, holding his hands up. “Show off.”
You took that as a tiny win, and decided to keep it going, playing on his words from earlier. ‘You keep me guessing at every turn…’
You pushed your hair back behind your shoulders, and leaned yourself down, letting your mouth meet his boxer-covered dick. You nipped your teeth lightly at it, making him hiss. You could tell just from this little bit of contact that he was well-endowed, and you felt your mouth physically watering for him. You needed to taste him. Your lips bounced around, peppering little kisses all over… the indirect contact making his hips jut up a little. 
You sat back, motioning with your hands. “Pull them down for me.” you demanded of him, and he gave you the sneakiest smirk, leaning back and pushing his pants and boxers down far enough to spring himself free. 
You weren’t wrong. He was perfectly sized, and it reassured you that you were okay with going forward with this. What you did notice, though, was he wasn’t as hard as you wanted him to be. Your hands rested on his thighs again as you sized him up, licking your lips as you prepared yourself. 
Josh had been the one urging you on all night, but suddenly, it felt like there had been a little bit of a shift. You finally brought your moistened lips to him, licking little circles around his tip, starting slowly at first, then picking up a little bit of speed. You swirled and gently suckled, and you felt him take in a big breath of air into his lungs. You glanced up at him, finding him looking up at the ceiling as he bit his lips. 
“What’sa matter, Josh? You okay?” you pressed, knowing that you could stop at any second, if that was what he wanted. 
“No, yeah. I’m fine. I’m sorry, I just… this is the first time someone else…since…” he didn’t need to say anything more.
“God, yeah. I’m sorry, your breakup is so fresh, I’m sure this is more mental than anything, for you…” you agreed as you sat back. “We don’t have to–”
“No. Yes we do, Y/N. I’m just…” You could tell Josh was having a hard time with his words again, for the second time tonight. 
“Just what? You can tell me…”
He swallowed, placing a sweet hand on the side of your face. “This is the first time I’ve um…been…with a woman…in a very long time.”
“Oh.” You muttered, his sentiment catching you off guard a little. You hadn’t realized you never even asked the name of his ex, let alone any details about the relationship.
“But it’s okay, Y/N…” He smiled, letting his thumb brush your cheek. “I may be wallowing in my sorrows, but it doesn’t mean I don’t want this, want you to do this. Just…in my head a little bit.” He admitted, putting a hole through your heart.
You sighed. “It doesn’t feel wrong?” Your voice was tiny as it escaped you. 
He quickly shook his head side to side as he layed back on his elbow behind his head. “No. That’s what’s making me freak out a little, it doesn’t feel wrong in the least.” He swallowed. “Maybe I…Maybe I wasn’t as in love as I thought I was.”
You smiled a pitiful smile as you rested your elbows on his knees, taking a deep, recentering breath of your own. 
“You’re really fuckin’ pretty, Y/N.” He complimented you out of the blue, his thumb still grazing your cheek. “And I’m really into you.”
“You are?” You asked.
“Yeah. I know we said we’re friends, but friends can do this. Right? Doesn’t stop the fact that I’m attracted to you.” His glossy words made your stomach do flips again as you realized maybe his feelings were the exact same as yours. Unexplainable, but still overwhelmingly good.
“Yeah. I really think friends can do this.” You agreed. And you were serious. If you were going to be this person for Josh, then he could also in turn be this person for you. 
“Plus, the feeling of your lips on my cock just now…” He laughed through his nose. “Might be in competition with your ten out of ten kissing. And you hadn’t even…” He stopped there, biting both his lips into his mouth as he slid his hips down again. 
Good god, you’d hoped he would have a little bit of a dirty mouth. 
“You want me to keep going?” You asked. 
“Fuck yeah, I do. I gotta judge your skill, don’t I?” He played, removing his hand from your cheek and running it through your hair. He gripped it a little, making you stiffen your neck. Your eyes flashed to his, and you didn’t even need to say anything, he knew what you meant. He nodded, giving you the go ahead, and you prayed that he wouldn’t remove his hand from tangling up in your hair. 
You slowly leaned down to him again, starting things up just as you had before. Your tongue swirled on his tip, wetting it in circles as you let the saliva build up in your mouth. Around and around you took it, descending further and further onto him with every rotation. You heard him breathe out, his hips shaking a little beneath you. As you got as far as you could get, you pursed your lips down, tightening them around the base of his cock before sucking hard, pulling up and off of him completely. His hand tightened in your hair, showing you that he was liking it so far. 
He let out a groan, followed by a little laugh. “Fuck yeah, Y/N…”
You quickly found a rhythm, letting your head begin to bob as you worked your tongue and cheeks, alternating forceful suction mixed with light little pops of your lips. His hips were jutting with every movement, and the sounds that were coming from him were enough to keep you going, keep you striving to impress him…
You took him in your hand, gripping at the base and using the saliva that had dripped down as lubrication to move your hand, twisting and pumping it. “Jesus Christ, you’re…” You took a second to glance up at him, seeing his jaw tightly clenched and his chest heaving with labored breaths. He brought his other hand down, pulling the hair that had drifted down away from your face, pulling it all back to the nape of your neck and holding it tightly there. You nodded, letting him know you were okay with him guiding your movements. 
“Mhm.” You hummed on him. “Show me how you like it.”
He let out a choke of breath and readjusted in his seat, spreading his legs wider for you. He gripped a little harder on your hair, pulling you up and across his stomach, your faces almost touching as he brought his mouth close. He didn’t say anything, just hissed through his teeth as he scanned over your face. He then used a little bit of force to push your head back down to where it was, and you resumed your work. 
Fuck, what the hell is happening… your chemistry with Josh was absolutely off the chain. You felt like you would follow every command he would ever give you, let him use you in the worst ways, completely trusting him to do as he pleased. You were absolutely yearning to satisfy him. 
“I’ll show you exactly how I like it baby, but this is your show, remember? You’re calling the shots…” he growled, his voice deeper and more grating than it was earlier. You shrugged one shoulder, replacing your hand around his base. You moved it up and down opposite of your mouth, making his whole body start to shake. Your tongue worked on him, as your mouth drifted down as far as it could possibly go, with the help of Josh’s light guidance.
The weed had contributed to your slow, languid movements while the alcohol made your inhibitions fly out the window… the beautiful combo of the crossfade sending you both into a blurry and slow-motioned entanglement. You swore you could listen to his noises and praises on repeat. “So fuckin’ pretty, Y/N… so fuckin’ pretty…” He mumbled, lightly thrusting himself into your mouth as your neck began to ache a little. “Slow and steady, just like that…”
He puffed out a quick breath with a blow of his lips, and you could tell that he was enjoying himself just as much as you were. Normally, you would finish up the job, and expect repayment, but getting Josh to even feel the tiniest bit of pleasure at your hand was enough. It was that draw, that need to make him feel good. Keeping him and him only in the spotlight. And if you had to guess, you were doing a pretty good job at it.
After a few seconds, his movements became jostled, and his once slow grinding movements started to falter. You felt him start to throb in your mouth, and you knew it wouldn’t be long until he was crumbling beneath you, all at the mercy of your mouth. 
“Hey, you want me to–” he said, suddenly shuddering. 
You nodded again, pleading with him to let it all go. You wanted the whole thing, wanted him to have the full experience. You needed to see what he tasted like. 
His breath started to pick up as he gripped your hair tighter, his hips pushing his dick further into your mouth as you let him graze the back of your throat, tears pouring from the sides of your eyes. “Come on baby, come on… just a little bit longer…fuck…” 
Finally, he was letting it all go, filling up your mouth as you swallowed his bitter-sweetness down, savoring the taste of him on your tongue. His whole body went rigid as he came, shaking and jerking as you worked to make sure not a drop was left behind. You squeezed your hand around him, pulling him up into your mouth. His whines were like music to your ears, pathetic and pitiful as he worked to come back down to earth. 
“Son of a bitch, Y/N… that was…” he said as you sat back up, wiping your mouth off with the back of your hand. He caught your jaw in his grasp, squeezing your cheeks together and forcing you to open your mouth. He pulled you closer, bringing you in for a heated kiss that left you smoldering for him. 
When you finally pulled away, you met eyes with him, and you could tell he was completely blissed out. “S’been a long time since I’ve had anything like that.” He admitted, pulling your back up to sit by him on the couch again. 
He tucked himself back in his boxers but decided to forgo buttoning back up. “Really? Even in a four and a half year long relationship?” You asked. 
“Ah, I dunno. We were long distance, so… it was few and far between but. Really I meant being with someone who actually showed passion about making me feel good. You know what I mean?”
You couldn’t help but smile. That was exactly what you wanted out of this. For Josh to feel that you wanted to be there. 
“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I just…wanted to make you feel good.” You admitted, shrugging one shoulder up as you brushed your disheveled hair back into place. “So, what’s my rating, huh? Give it to me straight.”
Josh closed one eye and looked up with the other as if he was thinking really hard. “Uh, nine and a half.”
Your mouth fell slack, and you felt the soreness in your jaw joints. “Ah! Why the half?!” You argued. “Not a ten?”
He chuckled. “Would be a ten, but I only took away the half because I know that I won’t be able to feel you like that all the time.” You both stared at one another as you let his words sink in. 
Could you, though?
“And because I feel like you were holding back, a little. Weren’t you?” He pressed. His statement took you by surprise, because he was right. 
“...Maybe…”
“You shouldn’t have. It’s just me, remember. Guess you’ll have to show up and show out next time. See if you can get a perfect ten.” He said with nonchalance. 
“Next time?” You spat without a thought. 
He shrugged, squeezing his hand around your thigh. “Sure, why not? If you want to, of course. Might be fun to have a little situation we’re both comfortable with… no strings attached type thing…”
You ran over the idea in your head, not really seeing anything wrong with it. You nodded, agreeing with his outlandish proposal.
“But, there is one thing, Y/N.” He swallowed, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head. “Obviously I… um. I didn’t make you feel good, tonight. But, just give me some–”
You cupped your hand over Josh’s mouth. “Josh, honey, shut up. You don’t have to explain it to me. I understand, and it’s okay. If we’re gonna do this, it's all gonna be in good fun, right?”
He nodded from behind your hand. “Right.” He mumbled. 
“And I certainly didn’t feel uncomfortable with you, so. I’m pretty positive we could just sit here and look at each other and we would have a good time.” You laughed, pulling your hand from his face. He caught your hand in his, and gave it a sweet squeeze. 
“Not sure I’d be able to sit by you for too long without something happening. You’re a fuckin’ treat, Y/N. I swear.” His eyes traveled down your body again, and you watched his gears turn as his gaze drifted over your breasts. “Thank you, for tonight.”
“Thank you.” You whispered. “We still friends?”
He took your chin between his fingers. “Yeah. Good friends.”
As the air between you finally started to settle and the intoxication turned into sobriety, you realized that the night was nearly about to turn into morning. You didn’t have to be at work until 11, so you were going to be able to get at least a little bit of sleep before your shift tomorrow. 
“It’s too late to get an Uber, Josh. Just stay here.” You more demanded than suggested, pulling the blanket from the back of the couch and tossing it overtop of his lap. You stood, stretching your body as you made your way toward your bedroom. 
“What, you not gonna invite me to your bed?” He asked, throwing you off. 
“Uhh, I mean, sure–”
“I’m kidding, Y/N. We’re friends. Friends don’t sleep in beds together. Friends sleep on couches.” You watched as he burrowed himself under the puffy blanket and made himself horizontal.
“Maybe one day you’ll end up in my bed.” You tossed the joke over your shoulder, walking down the short hallway. 
“And maybe one day you’ll get a perfect ten.”
-xo, Jules
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indigogvf · 11 months ago
Text
Need
Word count: 6.8k
Warnings: mentions of SA!!! smut (minors dni), alcohol. If I missed anything please let me know!
Summary: You and Jake have never seen eye to eye, but when a guy creeps you out at his house party, does that change?
A/N: awful summary lol sorry I’m so tired and have been wanting to post this for ages. This is not as good as I wanted it to be, or as long, but I do not have the patience for that. For some reason the ideas were just not flowing for this fic, so I feel like it’s kinda jumpy. Sorry about that!! Also, my requests are open!! Anyway, enough of me yapping. Enjoy!!
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This was not your thing; parties. It’s not that you hated them, but a nine pm bed time meant a lot more to you. Drinking made you sleepy. However, parties are especially not your thing when Jake is there. Even more so when they’re hosted at his house.
Much like tonight.
You can’t deny Josh’s puppy dog eyes for very long though, and you weren’t going to let one person ruin your night. He’s hosting the party anyway, so he has much more important things to worry about than trying to piss you off. You thought.
You thought wrong. As always.
The night begun smoothly. You felt confident and sexy, your dress hugging you in all the right places. You weren’t planning on getting into anyones pants tonight, but it felt nice to know you could. With that being said, you also felt nervous. You and Jake couldn’t get along at all; you can be civil when needs be, but it never lasts long. If you can’t get along sober, you doubt adding copious amounts of alcohol is going to have a positive impact.
You made your rounds of everyone, making sure to say hi to the people you knew; also making sure to keep well away from Jake. You and Jake have been holding the battle of “who can be the meanest” for quite some time now, and you honestly can’t even remember how it started, but you strongly disliked him. You’re both extremely stubborn, so as much as you feel bad for feuding with your best friends’ brother, you wouldn’t be caught dead making amends. And neither would he.
Obviously your first point of call after saying hello was getting yourself a nice, strong drink. A necessity, in your opinion. Definitely a necessity when jake’s around. You’d already lost Josh, who you came with, and you were now left to fend for yourself. You did know a good amount of people, but everyone knew everyone else more than you knew them, so you weren’t really sure where to start.
You wondered back to the main event, scouring the room for someone you know well enough to join their conversation. As you were looking around, you caught the eyes of Jake. His shirt was buttoned up by two buttons, max. You couldn’t quite see due to the darkness of the room. Speaking of, he’s wearing sunglasses. What a douchebag you thought. I mean, seriously? Sunglasses? In an almost pitch black room?
His hair was falling nicely, though. The sunglasses were giving his hair something to flow against, and it was framing his face well. It doesn’t matter how much you hate him, you will always be jealous of his hair.
He smirks at you, mischief written all over his face. You roll your eyes and move on. You promised Josh you wouldn’t argue with Jake tonight, and you really did feel bad. You know how hard it is for them to navigate this.
However, Jake had other intentions. He started walking over; you knew you were well within your rights to walk away, but you also knew that this would happen at some point, so you might as well get it over and done with.
“You look cute.” He mentioned sarcastically, gesturing to your dress.
“Thanks. Wish I could say the same about you.” You retorted with an eye roll, taking a step away from him. You wanted as much distance between you as possible.
“Oh, c’mon. You and I both know you like what you see.” He suggested with a cocky smirk, pointing at himself. He took a step closer, closing the space between you that you had just made.
“Seriously? You have that big of an ego? Take a look at yourself for once. You’re wearing sunglasses in a dimly lit room. Could you look like more of a dick?” You replied, taking a sip of your drink. You knew he enjoyed this a lot more than you did; you were easier to piss off.
“Look at myself? Look at you! You look like you’re begging to take someone home in that dress.” He laughed, throwing his head back. ‘Always so dramatic’ you thought.
“Yeah? Well at least I could take someone home if I wanted to, which I don’t, for the record. You can’t, not when you look like as much of an uptight prick as you.” You argued. You felt like steam was coming out of your ears. He always had to dig deep. Every time.
He began responding, but you had already started walking away. Like you said, you’d promised Josh you wouldn’t argue with him tonight, so you really didn’t want it to go any further.
You spot danny and Sam and take this opportunity to distract yourself. “hey guys, you having fun?” You asked as you waved at them.
“Hey y/n, did Josh ditch you? Already?” Sam queried, turning to face you. Danny sniggered beside him in response.
“Well, yeah. But I promise that’s not why I came to chat.” You knew that whatever Sam was suggesting was just a joke, but you also knew that if Josh hadn’t of ditched you, the overwhelming joy you felt when you saw them probably wouldn’t have been as intense.
“Yeah, whatever. How’s things with Jake? I see you’ve continued your feud.” Danny joined, subtly looking over to Sam. They know exactly how to wind you up. You will never understand how they find the humour in this situation; if it was the other way round, you would’ve grown impatient a long time ago.
“Yeah, but that’s done for the night. I’m really not in the mood for it to carry on tonight.” You said as you grabbed your drink to take another sip, taking a seat next to danny.
“Are you ever in the mood for jake, though? You say that every time, and every time the feud continues.” Sam giggled.
“You know, he’s right. How did this ‘feud’ even start? I can’t quite remember.” Danny said. Him and Sam were now laughing a little too hard considering how unfunny their comments were. At least you didn’t find them funny.
“You know what guys, maybe I will carry it on. Just for you.” You remarked, pointing your finger at both of them to further emphasis your point.
“Oh, we would love to see that.” Laughed Danny, turning to face you completely.
“Maybe you should just fuck it out. I mean, if all of our mutual friends can agree on that, maybe we’re right.” Sam added, without laughing. He was serious. He seriously suggested you ‘fuck it out’. With his brother.
“You guys suck. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to grab another drink.” You began walking away as they laughed; obviously happy with themselves for managing to wind you up.
You made your way into the kitchen, your eyes landing on a guy stood in the corner. You smiled politely as you walked past him to make your next drink. “You on your own?” He asked. Are. You. Serious. You thought. You were not in the mood for this.
“Uh, no. My friends are just in the living room, where everyone else is.” You said bluntly. You hoped that gave him the hint that you were definitely not interested.
Obviously, it didn’t.
“Your ass looks beautiful in that dress.” He said boldly as he took a step closer, looking you up and down.
“Thanks, but I’m not looking for any of that tonight.” You smiled in an attempt to soften the blow, whilst taking a step back.
“C’mon, you can’t wear a dress like that and not want some attention.” He laughed, reaching his hand out to brush your arm. You quickly retracted.
You were starting to panic slightly as it was clear he wasn’t getting the hint. “I’m okay, really.” You reiterated, taking another step back. You were now against the counter, awaiting his next move.
As he started to take a step towards you, Jake walked into the kitchen, pausing as he witnesses the guy come closer to you; again trying to reach out and touch your arm. He flicks his eyes to you, and you look at him with pleading eyes. You really hope he can see what you’re trying to tell him.
“Hey, what are you doing, man?” Jake asked, flicking his eyes between you as he walked further into the kitchen.
“That’s none of your business, man.” He mocks, drawing his attention back to you.
“It is when it’s my house. Did she tell you she was interested in you before you cornered her?” He asked, his tone dripping with sarcasm. He folded his arms and leaned on the counter, raising his eyebrows as he impatiently waited for his response.
“Well, I- no, but-“
“Enough said. Get off of her and get out of my house.” He spoke with a steady tone, pushing himself off of the counter and moving out of the way, further prompting the guy to leave.
You breathed out, not even realising you were holding your breath. “Thank you so much.” You sighed, running your hands over your face as you tried to ground yourself.
“Yeah, are you okay? Did anything else happen?” He asked with panic laced in his voice. He walked over to you and moved his eyes over you to check that you were okay.
You looked up at him. His eyes were laced with concern and worry; they looked softer, It was different. He always looked at you with such annoyance, but you liked this. “I’m okay. Thank you, Jake.” You replied. You really were okay, but unwanted men coming onto you will never get less daunting.
“I’m sorry that happened. If you need anything, you let me know. My bedroom is upstairs to the right if you need some quiet.” He said softly as he ran his hand through his hair, letting it fall back into place.
You were taken back, to say the least. You and Jake were never nice to each other unless absolutely necessary, but even then you were still throwing dirty looks around like there was no tomorrow. It was a moment of clarity. You would see Jake acting somewhat similarly to others; always so kind and caring. But never towards you. You wondered what it would be like to not dislike him so much, and to actually get along with him. Although this only gave you a small taste of that, you liked this a lot more than hating him. You still hated him though. You’re way too stubborn to admit that you might like him, even to yourself.
“Thanks. I’m okay, I promise. I always get shaken up when this type of stuff happens. I just need another drink.” You laughed a little, trying to soften the mood slightly. You picked up your cup and started to fiddle with it. You felt too awkward just standing there.
“Yeah, sure. Help yourself. Do you want me to stay with you and then help you find josh? So you’re not on your own again?” He suggested as he walked past you to get a drink out of the fridge.
What the fuck? You thought. You knew Jake could be nice, but you never expected him to be this caring. Not in a million years.
“Uh, yeah, actually. Would that be okay? I don’t want to steal you from your own party.” You mumbled, starting to pour a concoction of various kinds of alcohol into your cup.
“Of course. I know where he is, so it shouldn’t take long.” He reassured you with a soft smile, brushing past you to find a bottle opener for his drink.
You grabbed your drink and went with Jake to find Josh. Once you found him, you said your thank you’s to Jake and walked over to Josh.
“Was that Jake? Were you just with Jake? Did you just smile at Jake?” He asked, an excited grin on his face. He got up from his seat, eager to find out if your battle with Jake has finally ended or not.
“Yes, yes, and yes. Some guy was being a massive creep and Jake saw and kicked him out. He was really sweet, actually. It was weird.” You said, taking a sip of your drink whilst stealing Josh’s seat.
“Does this mean you both like each other?” He said, completely disregarding the small mention of the creepy guy; you didn’t blame him, though. This was exciting for him. His smile widened as he got more eager by the second.
“No. I still hate him.” You said firmly. You were not admitted the fact that you maybe, slightly like Jake. Not happening.
“Ugh, c’mon, y/n. You know he can be nice, you’ve seen it yourself. He’s even been nice to you now. Without any prompting.” He pleaded as he sat on the edge of the table opposite you.
You leaned back against the sofa and sighed. You looked at Josh’s face and you could see he was desperate for this to finally be over. “Okay, fine. I don’t like Jake. However, I’m not as inclined to gauge his eyes out when I look at him anymore. Happy?” You reasoned.
He shook his head and smiled. “Fine. This is a starting point, then.”
“Sure. You can call it that if you’d like.” You giggled. It was clear he was a little frustrated, all he wanted was his best friend and brother to get along, but it was fun to wind him up sometimes.
As the night went on, people slowly startled to filter out the party, only leaving a few people. You were thinking about jake, and how he helped you. You wanted to repay him, so you took yourself to the kitchen and began clearing up some of the used cups. You figured he would appreciate this, since no one likes cleaning up the morning after whilst morbidly hungover.
You were nearly done when Jake walked in. He paused in the doorway, “What are you doing?” He asked, not moving.
“Oh, hi. I’m just cleaning up a little bit. Thought it might help you out tomorrow when you’re hungover.” You stated, smiling at him and continuing to throw away all the trash laying around.
“You don’t have to do that.” He began to walk over and attempted to take the bag from your hands. You pulled your hands away.
“You didn’t have to help me earlier.” You looked up at him and sent him a reassuring smile. You really wanted to help out.
“How are you doing after earlier?” He asked, ignoring your previous statement.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just glad you helped.” You replied, setting the bag down on the floor when there was no more trash left on the counters.
“How are you getting home?” He wondered, picking up the trash bag and moving it to the doorway so he could take it out later.
“Oh, I was just going to get a taxi.” You said as you fiddled with your rings, again feeling awkward with this new tone of conversation between you.
He shook his head, “No, you can stay here.”
“Why do you care how I get home?” You retort. It came out slightly harsher than you expected, and he took a step back.
“Why do i care?” He repeated. “Look, we might not see eye to eye, but what happened to you tonight wasn’t okay. He might not have done anything, but who knows what might’ve happened if i didn’t show up at the right time. I know you know that, and I also know that you’re going to have overwhelming anxiety about getting into a taxi, by yourself, at night. I’m not willing to let you do that whilst you’re also drunk and vulnerable. What kind of person would that make me if I didn’t care?” He said, raising his voice. He began to walk away from you, making his way out of the kitchen.
You rushed over to him, grabbing his hand to pull him back into the kitchen, “Wait, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out like that, I guess I’m just used to keeping my guard up around you.” You apologised, looking up at him. You realised you were still holding his hand, so you hesitatingly let go. You’d never really been this close to him, and you weren’t complaining. You studied his features, moving your eyes around his face.
“I know, me too. I’m sorry for shouting, it’s just annoying because I was being nice, and you sort of threw it back in my face.” He said as he did the same to you; studying your features.
You wondered what it would be like to kiss him, or what his calloused hands would feel like against your bare skin, or how he would feel insid- stop. You still hate him. You thought.
He wondered the same about you. He wondered how soft your lips would feel; how you would taste. He was willing to find out. In a moment of boldness, he began to move closer to your lips. He was getting closer, closer, clo-
“Hey guys- wait a minute. Did I just interrupt something?” Josh said as he walked into the kitchen, a smirk beginning to spread on his lips.
You both moved away from each other, not wanting to let on that you were making up with each other; or whatever you were doing. You weren’t really sure what just happened.
“No.” You both spoke at the same time.
“I was just clearing up, and then Jake came in. That’s all. What were you going to say?” You stuttered. You fiddled with your rings again, looking down at your hands.
“Oh. Well, I’m going to bed. I’m staying here tonight by the way, Jake.” He turned around and made his way out of the kitchen and upstairs to the spare room.
You giggled at Josh as you turned round to face jake again. “So, am I staying here, too?” You asked. You felt bad asking, but he was pretty clear on his opinions about you getting a taxi.
“Yeah, if that’s what you want.” He responded. He reached his hand to the back of his neck, playing with his hair. He obviously felt nervous. Or awkward. Probably awkward, you assumed.
“Yeah, thanks. Can I take a shower?” You asked. You felt gross, you always did after drinking. You noticed his eyes move over you, sparking a warm feeling in your belly. You tried to push the feeling away, not prepared or ready to feel this way about him on such short notice.
“Yeah. The bathroom is upstairs, opposite the top of the stairs. The towels are in the cupboard next to it.” He replied whilst pointing upstairs. Neither of you moved, you just started at each other. You were both equally as confused at what happened before Josh interrupted. Was it a moment? Was it not a moment? Who knows.
After a few seconds of painfully awkward silence and staring, you left to go upstairs and take a shower. You found the towels in the cupboard that Jake mentioned, and turned the shower on. You adjusted the temperature so that it was a little warmer, and peeled off your dress. It felt good to get it off of you; you never found tight dresses as the most comfortable option.
You tied your hair up in a bun after seeing the stingy amount of options for shampoo. You also didn’t fancy sleeping in wet hair. You stepped in and immediately relaxed at the feeling of the water hitting your back, making every effort to not get your hair wet. You took your time washing yourself, not wanting to leave the warmth of the shower. Your mind wondered to Jake. You’d always thought he was attractive, but you were never attracted to him. Probably because he was never nice to you. But after tonight, after seeing the caring side you’d only ever observed, you felt differently about him. It was hard to dislike him as much when you had been on the receiving end of his selflessness and kindness. You wondered what this meant for your relationship with him. Were you still enemies? Or were you walking into new territory with him? You weren’t sure.
Eventually, you decided to get out and began drying yourself. You wrapped the towel around you and tried to find Jake to ask where you would be sleeping, and if he had any clothes for you to wear. Both questions which should’ve been asked before you got in the shower, you realised. You found him in his bedroom, sitting on the edge of his bed in just his trousers. You’d never seen him shirtless, and you’d never say no to seeing it again; that’s for sure.
You knocked gently on the door despite it being open, to let him know of your presence. He looked up and raked his eyes down your figure. You felt exposed.
“Hey. I was just wondering if you had anything for me to wear, and where I was sleeping?” You asked, speaking gently to not wake Josh up.
“Uh, yeah. You can sleep in here, if that’s okay with you. I’ll find you some clothes to wear, just give me a second.” He said, getting up from his bed and making his way to the chest of drawers to find some clothes for you.
“But where will you sleep?” You asked, feeling confused as you watched him dig through his clothes.
“On the couch downstairs. Here, you can wear this top. You can wear these pyjama bottoms if you want, but they’re a little big on me, so they’ll probably be big on you, too.” He muttered as he handed the pile of clothes to you. Your hands brushed together, the small amount of contact bringing back the warm feeling in your stomach. Stop. You thought.
“No, I’ll take the couch. I can sleep anywhere, it’s okay.” You responded, moving your hand to the top of your towel to stop it from slipping.
“Honestly, just take the bed. Take it as my formal apology for the last however many years of shit.” He smirked, attempting to make a joke out of the ‘however many years’ of torture.
“Oh, we’re apologising now?” You countered, returning his smirk.
“I think it’s about time, don’t you? Anyway, it’s your turn now. I just made my apology.” He said as he moved closer to you, leaning on the doorframe.
“Not to erase all of our progress, but that was not a very good apology.” You argued. God, he looked good without a shirt. You thought.
“I think it was a great apology. I’m offering you to sleep in a nice, warm, comfortable bed.” He retorted, gesturing to the bed behind him.
You shook your head and laughed. “It didn’t even include the word “sorry”, Jake.”
“Okay, fine. I’m sorry, y/n. Better?” He said, still sporting the same smirk.
You wanted to kiss him. You’d been trying to ignore this fleeting thought since you were in the kitchen together, but it was becoming insufferable. You squeezed your legs together at the sheer thought of him touching you.
“Better.” You responded, “I’m sorry, too. Truly.” You said, setting the tone to something more serious than before. You had less of an issue apologising to him now that he had initiated it, but you were so ready for this battle to be over between you.
He stared at you, not really knowing where to go from here. He also really wanted to kiss you; he thought you looked good in only a towel, and imagined how easy it would be to remove it. He imagined how you’d look underneath it, having to stop himself from finding out. He could see the swell of your breasts under the towel and felt himself starting to get hard. He saw your eyes flick down to his lips and linger there, before moving back up to his eyes. Does she want this, too? He thought. He took this as a signal that you felt the same and leaned in, capturing your lips in a gentle, yet passionate kiss.
You were in shock. You had been wanting this, but you did not realise he wanted it, too. You leaned into the kiss, feeding your hands into his hair. You tugged it at the roots slightly, earning a little groan from Jake in response. This felt so wrong; but it made sense. You wondered if all of your friends were right; maybe it was just built up sexual tension.
His hands moved round your waist, squeezing at your skin. His tongue swiped against your bottom lip begging for entrance, which you granted. You moaned into his mouth at the feeling and grabbed his arms, pulling him impossibly closer to you. You needed him, and he needed you just as much. You felt his hard-on press against your lower stomach. You could feel yourself getting wet at the thought of him inside of you, and reached your hand down and palmed him through his trousers. He sucked in a breath and pulled away, “Stop. Are you sure you want this?” He asked with concern and desperation written all over his face, pushing you away from him slightly.
“Yes, Jake.” You whined. You didn’t mean for it to come out like that; you were aiming for a steadier, firmer tone, but you found it hard to care, It’s not like you weren’t getting a little impatient.
He leaned back in, kissing you with more passion than before. He moved his hands to the top of the towel, silently asking you to take it off. You obliged, taking your hands away from his neck and unravelled it, letting it slide down your body.
He moved his eyes over your body, groaning at the site of you. “Fuck, you look so pretty.” He muttered, pulling you back into him and kissing you again.
You moved your hands to his belt a second time, undoing the buckle and chucking it on the floor. You undid the buttons and he slid them off, stepping out of them and kicking them out of the way. You saw his growing bulge through his boxers; you wouldn’t be lying if you said your mouth started watering at the sight. You wanted to taste him.
So you did just that. You got down on your knees, using his thighs as an anchor to ensure you didn’t keel over; that would be embarrassing. He looked down at you, his jaw slack and his hair draped around his face. He took his hand and gently cupped your cheek, slowly guiding your head forward. “You want a taste, baby?” He whispered, stroking your cheek with his thumb. You nodded your head yes whilst you took your hands to the tops of his boxers, he stopped you. Again.
“Words.” He demanded, tightening his grip on your jaw.
“Yes, I wanna taste you.” You muttered, still gripping his boxers.
He nodded, giving you permission to carry on. You slid his boxers down, revealing his hard cock. There was pre cum dripping out of the head, and you swear you almost started dribbling at the sight.
You leaned forward, his hand still pressed against your face, and licked up the side. He took in a sharp breath and closed his eyes, moving his hand so that he could grip your hair.
You took the head into your mouth, sucking gently. You wanted to tease him. You moved down slowly, hollowing your cheeks ever so slightly. “Ah, fuck. Don’t tease.” He uttered. His breathing was starting to get irregular as you continued down his length.
He was getting impatient. He needed to be inside of you, and you were taking too long. He moved his hand to the back of your head, edging you forward and testing the waters. You hummed around his cock, giving him approval.
He moved your head forward, forcing you to take almost all of him into your mouth. He was huge; to say the least. You hollowed your cheeks as much as you could as he created a rhythm for you. You moved your hand from his thigh to the base of his cock, jerking him off slowly as you took the rest of him in your mouth.
He hit the back of your throat and you gagged around him. His hand faltered as he threw his head back, “Jesus, y/n.” He growled, pulling your hair harshly. You could start to feel him pulsing in your mouth, and you knew he was getting close. He was panting, at this point. His hair was sticking to his face and his jaw was slack. He looked hot, and the need you’ve been feeling for him has just increased by an obscene amount.
Almost as if he could sense your increasing desire, he pulled you off of him. “I nearly couldn’t stop myself.” He admitted sheepishly whilst he helped you off of your knees, bringing you in for another kiss. He could taste himself on your tongue; he could’ve come if he carried on, the images of you on your knees flooding his head.
“Get on the bed.” He uttered, unbuttoning his shirt and throwing it onto the floor. You obliged, swaying your hips as you walked over to the bed.
He joined you on the bed and pushed your legs further apart, “Now it’s my turn to taste you. You want me to taste how sweet you are, honey?” He whispered as he placed soft kisses around your dripping cunt.
You moaned at the sheer thought of his mouth on you, “Yes, please.” You whined, moving your legs further apart as a way to prompt him.
He liked a stripe down you, causing your hips to buck into his mouth at the sudden sensation. You grabbed his hair in your hands, tugging slightly. “Eager, are we? I’ve barely even touched you.” He taunted, smirking to himself at the thought of getting you so worked up.
Your cheeks turned a crimson colour from embarrassment. “Please, do something. I need you.” You pleaded. It was getting too much now; you just needed something, badly.
“Be patient.” He muttered into you, pressing his mouth against you again. He circled your clit with his tongue, and with no warning, pushed his fingers into you; setting a relentless pace. The noise you made was inhuman, and as a reminder of the sleeping beauty next door, Jake smacked his hand on your thigh. Your hand flew to your mouth in an attempt to hide the noises coming from you.
The rate at which he was pumping his calloused fingers was sending you to the edge at an embarrassing pace; he could feel you squeezing his fingers, “You gonna come for me, pretty girl?” He asked, somehow pumping his fingers even faster than before.
He sucked on your clit, and you couldn’t take it anymore. You were trying to speak, but you were sure your words were incoherent. Your orgasm was imminent; you were bucking your hips, desperate to come. His fingers hit a particular spot within you, and a wave of pleasure crashed into you full force. You were chanting his name like a mantra, though you were sure it made no sense. He took his fingers out of you and began lapping you up, striving to collect every little bit of your orgasm on his tongue. “So sweet.” He groaned.
You tried to push his head away; but he was stronger than you and carried on. “Can you give me another one? I know you can, sweet girl.” He prompted, pushing his fingers back inside of you and, yet again, setting a relentless pace.
“I need you, Jake.” You begged, still trying to pry his head away from yourself. You threw your head back into the pillows as the slight pain of overstimulated faded, being replaced with pleasure. “God, Jake.” You moaned.
“You gonna come around my fingers again, hm?” He taunted, placing his mouth back on your clit straight away.
“Fuck! Yes, yes, yes.” You whimpered, feeling your second orgasm approach quicker by the second.
“See? I knew you could do it for me.” He remarked, “C’mon, sweet girl. You can do it. Just one more and then you can have my cock, yeah?”
His words of encouragement egged you on, and you pulled at his hair in an attempt to bring him even closer. He groaned into you; the vibrations sending you over the edge. You threw your head back, squeezing your eyes shut. You were beginning to wonder why you hadn’t listened to your friends because you did not want to wait any longer for him, and you were already half way there.
He pulled his head away, and slowed down the pace of his fingers, slowly working you through your high. He climbed on top of you, and the cold metal of his necklaces touching your chest sent a chill down your body.
You leaned in, starting a heated kiss with him. You couldn’t get enough of him; eager to feel him inside of you. He moved down to your chest, taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking harshly. You arched your back into him, “Please, Jake. Please, I need you so badly.” You cried, wrapping your legs around his waist.
You moved your hand down to his cock and stroked him softly, “you want my cock, baby?” He uttered, trying to conceal the groan he let out from such a delicate touch.
“I can’t take it any longer, I need you, Jake.” You demanded, quickening your pace on his hard cock. He could’ve come right there and then; the combination of your touch and your shameless begging making it hard to control himself. It was painful, and he wondered how he didn’t just fuck you up against the wall the second you removed the towel.
He removed your hand, replacing them with his own, giving himself a few languid strokes before guiding it to your entrance. “You sure about this?” He asked, his tone switching from demanding to concerned.
“Jake, if you don’t fuck me right now, I might go insane.” You stated, looking up at him with pure desperation. You genuinely thought you were going to combust with how impatient you were getting.
He needed no further confirmation, and thrusted into you. You yelped at the feeling of him; the burning sensation from his cock stretching you out catching you off guard.
“Shit, y/n. You feel so good. So ready for me.” He panted, setting an unforgiving pace. His thrusts were deep, and reached all the right places.
You wrapped your arm around his back and dug your nails into him, needing something to grip onto. He groaned at the feeling, gripping the sheets beneath him. You could feel yourself getting closer already, and so could he, “Are you close? I can feel you- fuck, I can feel you squeezing me.” He groaned into your neck, “I wont last much longer if you keep doing that.” He moaned as he started to suck on your neck, leaving reminders of tonight for tomorrow.
You tried to respond, but the immense pleasure you were feeling caused your mind to go blank. You were trying to hold your orgasm off; not wanting this to end, but to no avail, your third orgasm came crashing down. You dragged your hands down jakes back, most definitely leaving scratches for him to discover tomorrow. He fucked you through your high; not faltering once, whilst whispering sweet words of encouragement into your ear, “you’re doing so good for me, baby.”
You came down from your high, feeling utterly fucked out. “Can you do one more for me? I know you can- fuck, just one more, please?” He said, his steady facade slipping in an instant.
“Jake, I can’t. It hurts.” You pleaded. On one hand, you never wanted this to end. But on the other hand, you were exhausted and the overstimulation hurt.
He moved his hand down to your clit, circling his fingers around it quickly. “You said that last time, and you did. Stop being pathetic.” He growled, leaning his head into your chest to start sucking on your nipple.
Pain turned into pleasure; as usual, and your fourth orgasm was fast approaching. “You can do it, please do it.” He begged, his hips faltering as he tried to hold off his orgasm. “I need to feel you come around my cock.” He pleaded, quickening his fingers which were circling your sensitive clit.
He toyed with your clit faster, silently pleading with you to hurry up.
It worked.
Although not as intense as the last three, you were still sure you were sent to some other dimension as your fourth orgasm hit you. You could feel jakes hips faltering as he fucked you through your orgasm, whilst also keenly chasing his own.
“Fuck! I’m gonna come, y/n. Where do you want it?” He asked, his face screwed up and seconds away from coming.
“Inside! Please, I wanna feel you fill me up.” You urged as he tucked his head into the crook of your neck.
His hips stopped, and he let out a guttural moan that you wish you could play on repeat. You pulled his head away from your neck, trying to see his face as his come filled you up. His hair was stuck to his face with sweat, and his cheeks were a crimson red.
He collapsed on top of you, his heavy breaths heating you up even more. You brushed his hair out of his face and tucked it behind his ears, wanting to see his fucked out face.
He rolled off of you and got up to the bathroom, leaving you on your own to reflect on what just happened. When he came back, he had a wash cloth and kneeled beside you to clean you up. “You okay?” He questioned gently, stroking the outside of your thigh.
“Yeah. Just tired, is all.” You replied, smiling at him. He thought you looked cute; sprawled out on his bed looking all fucked out and tired.
He discarded the cloth and came to lay next to you, pulling you into his chest. You wrapped your leg around his waist, and absentmindedly started to draw patterns on his bare chest.
“Thank you. For helping me earlier.” You mentioned quietly. You felt bad. Now that you had seen, first hand, just how caring he is, you felt bad for the way you had previously treated him.
“Look, y/n,” he sighed, “I’m not a bad person. I know we haven’t gotten along for some time now, but it doesn’t feel good to think that you assumed I’d ever leave someone to fend for themselves in that type of situation; or any type of bad situation. I personally think I just adequately apologised by making you come four times, but I think you’d disagree. So, I’m sorry, y/n. I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you, and for all of the comments I’ve made towards you. I’ll be honest, I’ve seen the way you are towards others; the real you, and I’ve always wondered what it would be like to be on the receiving end of that. Now I know that you’re a great person, and always have been.” He confessed, stroking your hair softly. You were overwhelmed, to say the least. You never expected to make up with Jake so fast; let alone going from hating him, to having sex with him, all in one night.
“I’m sorry, too. I know, and knew, you weren’t a bad person. If we’re sharing secrets now, I’ve wanted to make it up to you for a while, but I was too stubborn. I would agree that you adequately apologised, but hearing you say the words made it a lot better. The best apology I’ve ever received, if you will.” You giggled softly, admiring his face. He always thought you were attractive, but seeing you in this knew light made it different for him. He wasn’t just attracted to the way you looked anymore, but you as a person, too.
You wondered what this meant for both of you. You knew you at least liked each other now, but you wanted to know him. The small taste of the real Jake you had gotten tonight was simply not enough.
“What does this mean for us? Are we friends now?” He queried, a frown appearing on his face.
“I’m not sure. Why don’t you take me out to dinner and we can find out?” You countered, your heart rate increasing at your sudden boldness. He stopped stroking your hair and looked at you with a grin.
“Deal.” He agreed, leaning down to press a gentle kiss on your lips. You pulled away, nuzzling your head into his chest with a giddy smile plastered on your face.
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builtbybrokenbells · 9 months ago
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LEX TALIONIS - the law of retaliation, whereby a punishment resembles the offense committed in kind and degree.
The one in which the player, who is fantastically gifted in her ability to play, finally gets a taste of her own medicine.
PAIRING: Jake Kiszka x f!reader, Josh Kiszka x f!reader
WORD COUNT: TBD
WARNINGS: SMUT 18+ (lots because everyone is a whore in this one) (list of full warnings within each chapter), drinking, smoking, swearing, angst, sorry if i miss any!
I. ORSUS | TEASER
II. MALUS
III. VENEFICA
IV. FRATRES SEMPER
V. LEX TALIONIS
STORY DISCLAIMER: to ensure there is no confusion, this is not a love story 😉 all my love x
DISCLAIMER: I do not know Greta Van Fleet or any of the members personally. This is all fiction and I will never claim otherwise. I attempt to keep all of my work 100% original, so please do not steal or take credit for my writing. As of right now, I aim to get chapters out on weekends, but it is not guaranteed as I do have a full time job and other responsibilities to attend to. Please be patient and kind to me. Do not mind any grammatical errors or spelling mistakes, as I am the sole writer/editor for my blog and do miss things sometimes.
TAGLIST: if you would like to be added to the Lex Talionis taglist, fill out this form. i promise i will see it, and if i happen to miss you, don’t be scared to ask again!
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT: I am incredibly grateful for all of the support, likes, reblogs and kind comments I receive from all of you. I would be nothing without your support, and I do take the time to read and appreciate every reply and message, even if I don’t respond. Thank you so much for all you do, and I sincerely hope that you enjoy this story as much as I do 🫶🏻
all things lex talionis:
playlist: apple music | spotify
moodboard:
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thespacesoffalseandtrue · 2 years ago
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i am back and better than ever with something that has been in my inbox A LOT. hope this fills all of the fantasies in each of your pretty heads. my inbox is open, all the feedback is wanted
warnings: PERIOD SEX!!!! fluff jake, demanding jake, oral (m) receiving, unprotected sex, MINORS GET LOST.
You were taking it easy today, the sun was shining through the windows when you woke up and you had a visit from your period to greet you. Your cramps came and went as the day went by, not really bothering you but present enough to remind you.
You were putting the dishes in the dishwasher when you heard the front door open. You turn to find Jake standing in the corner of the kitchen. He had been gone all day, leaving a note on the fridge with the word “studio” scrawled on it with a heart.
“Hey,” you say, washing your hands at the sink.
“Hi pretty girl,” he said, coming up, pressing a kiss to your temple.
“How was the studio?” You ask him as he makes his way to the fridge. He grabs a bottle of water, opens it, takes a long swig. You can’t help but watch his throat as he does this. He seemed tense, pensive almost. Something must have happened at the studio today.
“It was good,” he says to you, putting the cap on the nearly empty bottle. “But I could think of something else I would rather be doing.”
His eyes lazily trail your body. You were wearing a cropped shirt and yoga pants, but with the way hunger sparkled in his gaze, you might as well have been naked.
“That bad?” You ask him. You move around him to go get the folded laundry you left on the back of the couch. You knew that there was usually no place Jake would rather be than at the studio playing his guitar.
Jake simply shrugged, unwilling to talk about what did or didn’t transpire today. “There’s been better days.”
“I’m sorry,” you tell him, “is there something I can do?” You turn to him as he follows you, grabbing the rest of the clothes off the back of the couch and into your shared bedroom. He doesn’t answer, instead he silently helps you put the clothes in their drawers. You’re about to ask him again when he finally answers you.
“Come over here,” he says from across the room with a hand outstretched to you. You oblige, obviously, when you’re close enough, you take his hand and he pulls you into a hug. He buries his face into your neck and takes a deep breath.
You wrap your arms around him, rubbing his back slightly. He reaches down and squeezes your ass while kissing your neck. When you shiver, he backs you up until you feel the bed on the back of your legs. You don’t move to sit down, instead his lips crash to yours, fiercely. Your arms tighten around you and he moans low in his through. His hands play with the hem of your shirt, his fingers find the bare skin of your waist causing you to shiver. He breaks the kiss and pulls your shirt over your head, tossing it on the floor beside you. His eyes darken when he finds your chest bare, your nipples peaked, begging for his attention.
When he bends down to take your nipple in his mouth do you finally say, “I started my period today.”
“That’s good for you.” He says moving to lick the other nipple. His calloused fingers pull at the other one, not wanting it to feel abandoned.
You groan in pleasure and arch against his mouth. “I have a tampon in, Jake.”
“Noted. Now be quiet.”
Your period didn’t seem to bother him or turn him off. His mouth was still working hard on your chest. But you couldn’t help but feel self conscious, sex on your period wasn’t something you had ever tried, for a reason.
“I will be quiet after I say this one thing. The idea of sex on my period doesn’t make me feel sexy.”
He stops and looks at you.
“Allow me to change your mind then.”
He pushes you down until you’re sitting on the bed. He unzips his black pants, takes his hard cock in his hand, and uses his other hand to hold your hair back.
“You’re so pretty, I’ve been thinking about your pretty mouth all day.”
A thrill ran down your body. You knew what he wanted, no, what he needed. Giving him a sly smile you encircled his shaft with your hand and lick the engorged head, you loved the familiar and slightly salty taste of his skin. You close your eyes when you take him all the way into your mouth. He groans in pleasure.
He cradles your head in his hands and flexes his pelvis, slowly sliding his hard cock down your throat. You take it all, mouth open wide.
“Fuck,” he whispers raggedly. “You are a dream.”
You swallow around his length and he moans out your name.
Setting a slow, steady pace, you take him in and out of your mouth, sucking and licking the crown and stroking his rigid shaft, sliding your tongue along the throbbing vein that runs under the length of it. You suck and swirl and stroke, your head bobbing and your nipples aching, so turned on, you think you might be able to cum from the friction of your panties against your clit alone.
He fucks into your mouth until he’s panting. Low helpless groans come from deep in his chest. His cheeks are slightly pink and his eyebrows are furrowed. He wraps a hand around your throat.
“I’m close baby, are you ready?”
When you make a small sound of agreement around him, he begins to thrust harder and faster until he’s moaning your name, his head thrown back and his eyes shut. He climaxes, spilling himself on your tongue in short bursts, every one you swallow, looking up at him through your eyelashes in a lust-filled haze.
He’s still for a moment, catching his breath, slightly rubbing the scalp of your head with his fingertips. He opens his eyes and looks down at you as you clean him off with your tongue. He smiles down at you and runs his thumb across your bottom lip.
He pulls you up from your sitting position and flush against his chest. His lips hover over yours, you can feel the heat radiating off of them. You wanted to press your lips to his and tangle your hands in his hair.
“Okay?” He asks you. You knew what he was asking.
“I don’t know,” you said, feeling heat rush to your face at the idea. “I am so gross, Jake and it will be so messy and the sheets…”
“Let’s make a mess of them, yeah?” He presses his lips to yours, in a gentle kiss. “Nothing about you is gross, okay? This is a normal part of life but it shouldn’t stop you from living.”
“From fucking you, you mean?” You say jokingly.
“That too. It is my favorite part of living at least.” His eyes were so sincere, so warm, so familiar. You trust him completely, knowing he wouldn’t do anything to make you feel uncomfortable.
“Okay,” you tell him. He smiles at you big and guides you down to lay flat on your back. He yanks his shirt off over his head. His pants and underwear follow closely behind. He bends down to trail kisses from your neck, your breasts, your stomach. When he reaches the waistband of your yoga pants he looks up to you, making sure you are still okay. You nod and lift your hips, allowing him to pull both your pants and panties off.
He slides his left hand under your hips, to situate you, and then presses your clit between his thumb and forefinger.
You gasp in pleasure at the sensation. Keeping his left hand between your thighs, his right hand moves and grips your breast. You feel as if your body was on fire. He looks up at you with hooded eyes as he continues to lazily stroke your clit.
You bite your lip and close your eyes. He moves up and begins to pepper kisses around your nipple. He begins to bite and tug at the bud and his tongue smooths over the stinging spots he leaves in his wake. You begin to rock your hips against his hand.
“Good girl,” he says, his thumb and forefinger moving faster against your clit. You can feel yourself being brought over to the edge of pleasure. Right as you’re about to tell him not to stop, does he stop. You whimper at the loss of friction.
“I’m going to take care of this okay?” You open your eyes and see him holding the string to your tampon.
“No, Jake, let me-” before you can finish your sentence he had already removed it and threw it away in a trash can beside the bed. You could feel your cheeks begin to warm.
“Hey it’s okay, it’s just me,” he says, bringing a hand up to your cheek.
“I know,” you say, bringing him down to cover you. You expected yourself to be more embarrassed or turned off but this was Jake and the way he felt against you, over you, nothing could ever compare.
“I love the way you look under me,” he says, lining himself up to your entrance. He thrusts into you in one swift motion.
“Fuck,” he groans out, “you take me so well.”
Your hands move to his back, looking for an anchor as he begins to move against you at a smooth and even tempo.
You try very hard not to make a sound, but you can’t help how hard you’re breathing. You keep your eyes squeezed shut as the pleasure builds. Heat ripples through your lower body in waves, intensifying with each stinging blow and stroke of him inside of you. Soon, you’re biting your lower lip with the effort to keep from moaning.
“I want to hear you, don’t be shy.”
You can hear how wet you are, your ecstasy and your period mixing together. You look down and see that your slick has coated him from the small patch of pubic hair that sits at his navel all the way down to his thighs. He looked like you had painted him a scarlet color. The sheets underneath you were once a light gray and are now stained in crimson. You should be embarrassed, disgusted even but your body was pulsating with pleasure.
The pad of his thumb found its way back to your clit and he began to rub it in smooth circles. You weren’t sure how much longer you were going to be able to wait.
“Jake,” you gasp out between pants.
“Cum,” he commands you, moving his thumb faster to match his thrusts. “I want to feel you cum around me.”
You feel your walls contract around him. You buck and cry out, convulsing helplessly. He’s growling something in your ear that sounds filthy, but you can’t concentrate on anything else but the pleasure exploding through your body. He grips your hips tightly.
“Fuck I’m going to fill you up.” He fucks you through your orgasm and does exactly as he says, fills you up just as he did your mouth minutes ago.
When you return to yourself, you’re weak, feeling emotionally exposed, and shaking all over.
Jake looks absolutely fucked out, eyes glazed over, cheeks flushed, skin slick with sweat as he leans over and kisses you so softly as if you were going to break.
“Who do you belong to?” He whispers softly.
“You,” you tell him.
“Who fucks you better than anyone ever has?”
“You,” you say again.
“Who loves you more than anything in the entire world?”
“You.”
He smiles softly at you and peels his body off of you. His eyes glance down to the mess the two of you made. You could feel the coppery stickiness between your legs and you can’t n help but smile slightly at the mess on his legs too. He smirks up at you and pulls you up to his chest so that you’re standing beside him pressed to his side. He kisses you once and then spins you around so that you can see the bloody mess on the bed sheets.
“Damn hottest thing I’ve ever seen, you looked so beautiful, ethereal. Thank you for letting me experience you.” He whispers in your ear. He kisses your bare shoulder.
“Can we go shower?” You turn to ask him.
“Should I change the sheets before or after?”
“Why would you wait until after? Just do it now and I will help you?”
“No I just don’t want to go through all that trouble changing the sheets if we are just going to mess up another pair,” he says with a grin and a playful slap to your ass.
You can help yourself you grin up at him and all but skip to the shower, hearing him follow closely behind.
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hearts-hunger · 1 year ago
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a sure and steady hand
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Read on AO3 | Masterlist | Standalone in the Cabin Fever universe
Summary: Josh comes home sick, and you take good care of him.
Pairings: Josh x Reader | Genre: fluff, sickfic | Word Count: 2k | Warnings: none!
A/N: More Josh and Baby! Thanks to everyone who shared their cuddly Josh pics today — they were my "research" for this fic :3 I hope you like it! ♡
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You woke to a tangle of blankets and a very warm boyfriend. 
Propping yourself up on the pillows, you did your best not to wake him as you gently tried to disentangle yourself from him. He was snuggled so close that he was practically on top of you, and while you didn’t mind his closeness, he was awfully warm to the touch. You brushed his soft curls back from his face and weren’t surprised to see how flushed his cheeks were. 
Josh was always been a furnace, no matter the weather, and you felt that it suited him: it seemed like the light and comfort of his personality couldn’t help but show in rosy cheeks and warm, gentle hands. During the winter months, he was always happy to share a little of his warmth with you, and you’d fallen asleep in his arms the night before, thankful for the heat radiating from him as you pressed close under the covers. 
His temperature now, though, was starting to feel more like a fever. It was especially noticeable with the snow falling gently outside the window, highlighting the chill of your bedroom in your beautiful old house and the warmth of Josh’s face pressed against your neck.
You brushed your thumb over his cheek. “Joshy.”
He only cuddled closer to you. “Five more minutes,” he mumbled.
You smiled. “It’s okay, honey,” you said softly. “You need to sleep. Do you want me to call the boys and let them know?”
His expression scrunched then, and he lifted his head just enough to give you a sleepy, confused look.
“Let them know what?” he asked. His voice was gravelly, and he cleared his throat. “Am I late? What time is it?”
Without waiting for an answer, he reached over you to grab his phone from the nightstand.
“Might as well get up,” he said, giving you a wry smile. “Unless you want to try and squeeze some more sleep out of the seven minutes we have until my alarm goes off.”
You touched a hand to his back when he sat up. “Do you feel okay?”
He looked over his shoulder, a little distracted. “Yeah. Why?”
“You feel warm.” You touched your hand to the back of his neck, and a sweet little giggle bubbled out of him as he moved away from your hand.
“Quit that,” he laughed, and it quickly dissolved into a few crackly coughs. “Your fingers are freezing, baby.”
“Sorry,” you said. You sat up next to him. “I think you should stay home.”
He smiled. “Why, because you want me to stay in bed with you all day?”
You couldn’t say the thought hadn’t crossed your mind, but mostly you felt like he should stay home to rest.
“Let me take your temperature,” you said, getting out of bed to get the thermometer. He followed you to the bathroom, and you thought he was coming willingly to get his temperature checked until he started to brush his teeth. You looked around in the drawers for your thermometer gun but couldn’t find it.
“What’re you looking for?” he asked around his toothbrush.
“Thermometer,” you answered.
He rinsed his mouth out. “I don’t have a fever, baby. I told you I feel fine.”
You abandoned your search for the thermometer and put a hand to his forehead. “But you’re really warm, honey.”
“I run hot, you know that.” He pulled your hand down and kissed your palm. “I promise I feel fine, sweetheart. Thank you for worrying, but you don’t have to.”
He went to get dressed, sifting through his wardrobe for a few moments only to pick his trusty white sweatshirt and khakis. He shivered when he took his pajama shirt off and replaced it quickly with his sweatshirt.
“This house is like a meat locker,” he said, coming over to you to give you a hug. “I kinda wish I was staying home with you and snuggling all day.”
You put your arms around his neck and rested your cheek against his shoulder, watching the snow collect on the windowsill. He still felt overly warm, but you knew there was no use trying to get him to stay home. Josh was nothing if not dedicated to his work, and you knew that him admitting to wanting to stay home was a gentle reminder to you that he was still going to work but was thankful for your worry.
You kissed his cheek. “Come home if you start to feel bad, okay?” you asked. “Promise.”
“I promise, baby.” He gave you a tight squeeze. “I’ll see you after a while. I love you.”
You gave him a gentle smile. “Love you too.”
Snow continued to fall all day, piling up in a beautiful powder across your yard; you ventured out to turn on your Christmas lights when it started to get dark, and your house looked like a gingerbread house bedecked in candy and frosting at the end of your long driveway. Though the snow kept you inside most of the day, you did run to the store to stock up on cough drops, NyQuil, and Josh’s favorite tea. You made soup for dinner, knowing it would be the perfect meal for such a cold night and still convinced that Josh would need some homespun doctoring when he got home from work.
You saw you were right as soon as he came in from the car. You opened the door and meant to greet him when he came up, but he stopped at the top of the porch stairs; after a moment, he ducked his head with a harsh sneeze, and a fine dusting of snow fell from his curls with the movement.
“Goodness, bless you,” you said. "Come inside, honey. You’re covered in snow.”
“Sorry,” he croaked, his voice shot. He let you brush his jacket off on the porch before you helped him out of it, and no sooner was it off than he turned away from you to muffle a volley of congested coughs in his sleeve.
“Sorry,” he said again. He sounded terrible, and you guessed he’d probably pushed his voice to the limit trying to keep pace with the boys in the studio.
“It’s alright, sweetheart,” you said gently. You hung up his jacket and were surprised to hear him give a hoarse laugh.
“What’s so funny?” you asked, unable to help a smile yourself.
He shook his head. “Nothing. I’m just waiting for you to say ‘I told you so’.”
“Aw, honey.” You gave him a hug, and he buried his face in the crook of your neck. “I wasn’t going to say that. I’m just sorry you’re sick.”
“I should have stayed home, like you said.”
“You didn’t get a lot done?” You hated the thought that he’d gone in when he felt bad and hadn’t even gotten done the things he’d been planning on.
He lifted his head. “Actually, we did a ton,” he said. His smile was lopsided. “You should have heard me sing, baby. My voice sounded fantastic with it all hoarse and deep like this.”
“I bet it did,” you said truthfully, a little wry. Though you wished he wasn’t sick, you couldn’t deny that the raspy edge to his voice was alluring; you’d heard him sing coming off a cold before, and you’d been surprised how much you’d liked it.
You gave him a quick kiss. “But you’re going to lose your voice if you’re not careful,” you reminded him. “Which means you’re on vocal rest until I say so.”
He chuckled, and the sound was warm and gravelly. “Yes ma’am.”
You led him into the kitchen, having him sit at the table while you fixed him a bowl of soup and a mug of tea.
“Thank you,” he said, looking up at you with a glassy, exhausted, completely devoted gaze. You couldn’t stop yourself from cradling his face in your hands and giving him a gentle kiss, and you felt his smile when you did.
“What was that for?” he asked.
You brushed his curls back. “No reason. I just love you lots, that’s all.”
“Aw, baby,” he said tenderly. “I love you lots too. Thank you for taking care of me.”
It was your pleasure to take care of him, and you showed it by showering him with the affection and care he always gave you when you were sick. You put his pajamas in the dryer to warm them up; you brought him medicine; while he got a shower, you put on another kettle and set up the couch with a nest of pillows and blankets so you could watch a movie together. You wished there was more you could do, but he was a good patient and really wanted nothing more than for you to be close.
“Where are you going?” he asked when he was settled. His curls were tight and damp, his cheeks rosy, his hands wrapped around the mug to get all the warmth he could; he looked up at you pitifully, worrying you weren’t going to join him on the couch.
“Just to get into my pajamas,” you said as he bottled a few coughs in his chest. “And to get you some Vick’s. Pick out what you want to watch, okay?”
You changed into sweatpants and an old tee of Josh’s, grabbing the vapor rub and the box of tissues from the bathroom before you came back to the living room. Josh looked a little sheepish as the movie started, and you smiled at the familiar jaunty banjo tune and the voice of Kermit the Frog that started Emmet Otter’s Jug-Band Christmas.
“Is this okay?” he asked.
“We can watch whatever you want,” you reminded him. “And you know I love this one anyway.”
He smiled up at you as you came close, and his cheeks took on an even deeper color as you straddled his lap.
“Um, baby...”
“Settle down, cowboy,” you said with an affectionate laugh. “I’m just putting your medicine on. Hold still.”
He was patient and pliant as you rubbed the Vick’s on his chest and neck, giving a contented little groan of relief when you massaged your fingers over his sore muscles. 
“That feels so good, baby,” he said when you pressed your fingers down the line from his neck to his shoulder.
“I'm glad it’s helping, my heart.”
He looked up at you with a dreamy smile. “Call me that again.”
You kissed him. “I love you, my heart. My sweet Joshua.”
His hands gripped your hips gently, and you both lost yourself for a few minutes until he had to pull away with stuttered breaths.
“Sorry, I — ”
He caught a sneeze in the crook of his arm and groaned. “Ugh, why does it hurt to sneeze?”
“You poor thing,” you said with a tender laugh. You climbed off of him and handed him a tissue from the box on the coffee table. “Bless you.”
“Thanks.” He sighed and pressed his free hand to his temple, warding off a headache. “I wish I didn’t feel terrible. I’d just kiss you all night if I didn’t feel like I was going to drop dead any second.”
“So dramatic,” you teased, pulling the blanket over both of you and snuggling close. “Let’s take a rain check for when you’re feeling better.”
You could tell he was tired, and you watched with mingled amusement and affection as he tried to stay awake as the movie played. He rested his head on your chest, and you played with his hair as you sang softly along with the movie — “Thus the winds of time will take us, with a sure and steady hand, when the river meets the sea.”
“I like it when you sing, baby,” he said, his voice soft and hoarse. 
You smiled. “I like singing for you, Josh.”
He cuddled closer to you, seeking warmth and comfort that you were only too happy to give.
“You know John Denver sings this song?” he asked, half asleep.
“I do,” you said. “You got me that album for Christmas last year.”
His smile was drowsy. “Maybe we should do a Christmas album with the Muppets.”
You gave a soft laugh. “Maybe you should.”
You pulled the blanket up over his shoulders and tucked it snugly around him. He snored softly as he dozed, congested and content to let his body rest and heal; you lay with him and held him, loving when he curled his arm around you to get as close as he could be.
“Thank you for taking care of me, baby,” he said just before he fell asleep. “I love you.”
You kissed his soft curls. “You’re welcome, Josh. I love you too.”   
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josh taglist: @way-to-go-lad @prophetofthedune @stardustchxrds @bajabule69 @high-fidelity1 @grimm-gvf @gretnavannfleet @sunnykiszka
gvf taglist:@malany-gvf@spark-my-nature@eearevee@madneedshelp@demonrat444@josh-iamyour-mama@honeyandsweettae@mydarlingdanny@gretavandann@sacredjake@myleftsock@joshskittytickler21@hellowgoodbye@watchingovergvf2@fearfulspirit@mywaysoon@carbondancingthroughtime@caprisunsister@eraofstardustchords@sacredthefran@shesawomaninadream @serendipiti @demonrat444@wildflowerxx-x@tearsofdanny @iluvjoshkiszka @jordie-gvf-admin@demolitionndann@hi-hi-hello11@wildbluesorbit@nessie-glorpa@laneygvf
@gvfrry@ohhey1293@the-chaotic-cow@mountain-in-springtime@xserenax-13@stardustjtk @brooke-gvf@weightofdreams-gvf@jakeydoesit@gretasmokerising@hayley1623@doodle417@finestoflines@brokenbellz@bowievanfleet@s0livagant@strugglingtodoshit@s-u-t@kay-jordan@gretavanfleas@jakeyboiiiiiii@gretavansteph@gretavanbitches@myownparadise96@luverleaver@weightofdreamz@greatervanfleet@maedesculpaeusoubi@jakekiszkasbestie@pineapple-photographer@baguettejuliette@alexxavicry@levi-wants-ur-bones@carlybubs@cowboysamkiszka@dannyandthekiszkas@jordierama@slutforsteve@starshine-wagner@quartzzzzzzz@edgeofdreams@writingcold@lostoverseer@catharu77@mackalah@jaketlove @haileygvf @blacksoul-27 @ur-m0ms-blog@hi-hi-hello11@wildbluesorbit @nessie-glorpa @laneygvf@madneedshelp@dreamsingxld
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