emmawheller

[emmawheller]

Under the Shadow

The thing about it is, there's no blueprint. There’s no lesson plan she can consult. Schools don’t give out crash courses on how to live your life after the harsh spotlight of fame—that you never asked for, nor even wanted—burns brightly upon you.Some people think she asked for the fame. Who wouldn’t want to be famous, after all? So Emma lost her mom, most of her friends, her husband got caught up in it. Even strangers who barely knew her got hurt or even killed. It’s been a heavy burden she’s had to live with since the last rash of murders, but there are still people out there who think the fame—no, the notoriety—was worth it.It’s been twenty-five years since Crystal Lake. Emma had told herself she wouldn’t acknowledge the upcoming anniversary. She didn’t circle the date in her desk calendar with red sharpie. She didn’t tremble when she was flipping through TV channels. Except Emma raced into the bathroom and heaved and puked until her head throbbed and she had to lay down on the tile until the nausea passed. She wished she could say she’s gotten past it. Over it, in fact, but all those happenings still occur. Theres nothing anyone can teach you that will prepare you for the life endeavours you are bound to have. Memories you hope you’ll never forget, and memories you will fade alongside the dull heart ache that bruises ones ego with each reminder. Every journey has two outcomes, and your instinct in that moment in time determines your fate. And though our lives are laced with uncertainty, our journey will always end the same. We’ll lead the lives that are suited for us, but in the end we all will become frail. The things that repeated over and over inside’s Emma’s mind were enough to make any normal person go crazy.

Emma tried to stay awake, awaiting the arrival of her husband. Recently she found herself staying awake the entire night, thinking deeply of things that weren’t within her reasoning. She’d toss and turn, but her mind buzzed like a hive, never allowing her body to slip into the restful state she craved. As she continued to stare off distantly, focused on the lines of fences, or maybe trees, or houses–she can’t recall, really–maybe sleep had started to stir inside of her– the lights in the street lamps slowly dimmed. She faced the vacant field, squinting her eyes against the sun idling above her, she could picture the summer cabin situated on it’s cracked foundation. The once white walls now stained gray, the shudder’s on the windows hanging by loosened hinges. She could still hear the creaking of the wooden porch, and how the third step wobbled beneath her weight. How the high, vaulted ceiling had caved in after years of neglect after the accident. How the sun would beam from the inside out, like a Beacon of devastation.Emma was so sure she’d been here before … But why?That sense of loss she’d been feeling lately seemed to broaden, as if to open wide enough to swallow her whole. Standing before the empty lot, even now, she could picture what the inside could have looked like. The torn and blackened ‘Welcome’ mat at the front door that had once been painted red. And if Emma concentrated hard enough, she could envision a black Camaro parked right where she now stood now before she sees it.She wanted to run, but her legs did not listen, wouldn’t move when she tried. She wanted to turn tail and bolt and yet, she didn’t. She held her ground against the tall man that loomed over her, her eyes never leaving the pitch black holes of the hockey mask marked with a red design.

She shoots bolt upright, hazel eyes wide with complete and utter terror. Her chest heaves up and down, strangled breaths clawing out of her throat with such effort that you know it has to hurt. Her head throbs and she presses her palms against her eyes as if to hold the pain back. Tucking chocolate strands behind her ear she stumbles into the bathroom, letting the faucet run as she gazes back at her reflection hauntingly. Emma spills small and innocuous pills, and not at all like the real thing. The pills were red and shiny and about as little as her smallest fingernail, slightly oblong, and they promised to open your mind to a wilderness of wonders. Pushing them with the flick of her tongue to the back of her throat she dry swallows two, more then usual but lately she’s been on edge. A faint creak echoes throughout the house, she freezes in place gripping the edge of the sink as her head hung low taking a shaky breath. Flynn's voice rings throughout the room, and her shoulders almost instantaneously slump forward as she peers around the corner looking at him. “Jesus, you scared me.” She murmurs, slender arms snaking around his neck as she pulled him tightly to her embrace. Emma places a chaste kiss against his jaw as she finds the edge slipping away as quickly as it came. “I have dinner in the fridge, if you're hungry.”

When Emma shuts the door behind them, it almost feels like she’s closing out the rest of the world for just a little while. It feels safe. And when she loses herself in Flynn—and Flynn in her—she knows she’s safe. She grazed her thumb beneath his jaw, caged her fingers through his chocolate hair, whilst slowly easing her legs onto his thighs while she reclined in his embrace. He had this far away look in his eyes, Flynn like Emma had, suffered from the abundant lack of sleep, too. He was a boy who had seen too much, felt a stranger in his own skin. He was a bright boy but was consumed with too many questions and darkness. Sometime’s their worst enemy was themselves. She looks down at him now. Thinks about how those lips can easily be bruised, wondering if he was thinking of all the things she was - all the things they shouldn't be. “Everything okay? You seem kinda out of it.” she whispers quietly. Some people bring out the worst in you, others bring out the best. And then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who just bring out the most of everything. They make you feel so alive that you’d follow them straight into Hell, just to keep getting your fix. That was Flynn. It wasn’t hard saying yes when he asked her to be his wife, even after all this time theres no one who would understand her better than him. “I love you. You know you can tell me anything, right? or we can take a nice shower, watch those movies you like so damn much. Anything you want, you’ve got it.” She murmurs almost as if it was a well kept secret between the two.