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ageofbajabule · 1 year ago

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Dawn of Love | Chapter 1

Josh Kiszka x F! Reader

Word Count: 4.9k

Warnings: Fluff, Anxiety talk?, (i don’t think i’m truly missing anything. if i am please let me aware!)

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Author’s Note: (18+ themes further on in the series) This series is going to be my baby, my pride and joy. I’ve been putting so much time and thought into this, and I truly do hope you all enjoy it and what I have planned. Please understand no themes relating to 18+ will take place until Josh and Reader are of consenting legal age in the series. Other than that, I do hope you enjoy this series.

October 2013

You had moved around different school districts thanks to your father being in the military… But this move was the final one. He had retired from the Air Force and decided to move to a small town. Known by the name Frankenmuth. It was a Bavarian town, everyone knew everyone and everyone was friendly.

Fitting in wasn’t typically hard, but being a new student in school also put you in the spotlight. You never really made the time to make actual friends considering the situation you grew up in being a military family. So this time around, you had to make the effort to find friends. All day you had the boring classes of general studies. But the class you couldn’t wait for was poetry - something about poetry just spoke to you, it always gave you the feeling of a welcoming home.

It wasn’t always just poetry that caught your eye, film and theatre also held a special place in your heart.

Something about the way Shakespeare wrote always called out to you - specifically Macbeth.

The bell rang indicating your Math class had finally ended. And your last class of the day was Poetry. Making your way there, you had entered the classroom. It was a smaller class, giving it an elective course. There was about 9 other people, you sat near the front of the classroom. The first bell had rang, the teacher waited for any last minute students. And sure enough a boy with shoulder length wavy hair cane sprinting in.

“Sorry! I got stuck in a little traffic jam there in the hallway.” The brunette boy laughed,

“Mr.Kiszka… This isn’t anything new. You need to do better on being on time.”

Mr.Zawalski motioned for him to join the class. He ended up sitting at the desk beside you.

“Last week we finished up our readings from Emily Dickinson, we will be starting with Edgar Allen Poe today. I’m sure most of you are well aware of his work, he had a very different approach than most poets.” Mr.Zawalski spoke as he started parading around the classroom. Everything about Poe, he wasn’t typically your style, but you had grown to like his work.

“He’s kind of a bore… I wish he was a bit more enthusiastic when teaching.”

The brunette boy had leaned over to whisper to you, chuckling as he saw you jump at the sound of his voice, making you giggle softly.

“He has a very monotone voice… Makes me want to fall asleep.” You shifted your body so more of you turned to face the stranger beside you.

“I’m sorry. Let me introduce myself, I’m Joshua Kiszka. But you can call me Josh. What’s your name?”

“I’m Y/F/N Y/L/N, but you can call me Y/N.” You smiled at him softly.

“Well, it's a pleasure to meet you. Are you new here?” Then you heard Mr.Zawalski clear his throat, “Mr.Kiszka this isn’t time for mingling. Would you care to enlighten the classroom on what Poe’s poems were inspired by?”

Josh’s cheeks turned a shade of pink, then turned towards the teacher. “His own childhood trauma. At least that’s what most researchers have gathered.”

Seeming to be satisfied with Josh’s answer, Mr. Zawalski nodded and proceeded to carry on with his lecture - leading you and Josh to giggle quietly.

Before the end of class, Mr.Zawalski had announced there would be a project. And you had to pair up with somebody. Being you had been a new student and the only person you really clicked with was Josh, it was obvious who your partner would be.

“Well I guess we’ll be partners then?” He turned towards you,

“If you’re okay with that?” You smiled softly.

“Of course. Here is my number so we can start working on it.” He smiled taking your phone to type his credentials in, you sent him a text right away for him to save your information. “I’m free whenever. Except for this Wednesday night, I have theater tryouts.”

“I’ll be there too!” You smiled at him.

He chuckled softly, your smile turned wider. “Oh really? That’s great.”

You felt a blush creep onto your face.

“So what part are you trying for?” The bell then interrupted your conversation, “Guess you’ll have to find out at tryouts.” He smirked, getting up.

“That is a whole two days away!” You groaned getting up from your desk.

“I’ll tell you what, come over tonight so we can start working on this project. And maybe I’ll run a few lines to give you a hint at what part.” He cocked an eyebrow.

“Fine. You better stick to your word.” You giggled softly, walking towards your locker.

“You can come over around 5, join my family and I for dinner. My mom always makes enough to practically feed the neighborhood.” Josh spoke as he followed behind you, smiling from ear to ear as he spoke.

“Sure, as long as she doesn’t mind.” He shook his head, “She’ll be thrilled.” He smiled, then he was being pulled by a brunette guy who looked similar to him. But his hair was like a Justin Bieber style cut.

“Josh, we’re gonna be late for band practice.”

“Jeez, Jake I would’ve been right out!” Josh shouted, you looked between the two of them confused. “Sorry Y/N. This is my brother Jake.”

He smiled at you, “Twin brother actually.” Jake chimed in,

“But I’m older by 5 minutes!”

“Will you ever live that down?”

You giggled softly at them bickering. “It was great to meet you, but I don’t want to keep y’all from band practice. I didn’t know you were in the school band.” You smiled softly.

“No. Not a band for school, we have an actual band. We’re just getting started still…” Jake shook his head as he scratched the back of his neck nervously.

“Oh. I’m sorry… Well, have fun, and I’ll see you later.” You flashed a smile before leaving the two of them to go on with their business.

➳

You had luckily gotten your license recently before moving to Michigan and asked to use your mom’s car to drive over to Josh’s house to work on your project tonight.

The drive wasn’t too far from where you lived, in fact you only live a couple blocks from each other. You could’ve probably walked. When arriving you parked on the street out front of their house, making way to the front door. You knocked softly, hearing some yelling behind the door - a girl who looked close in age to you answered the door.

“Hi, I’m Y/N. Is Josh here? I’m here to work on a school project with him.” You spoke offering a small smile.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Veronica but I go by Ronnie. I’m his younger and only sister, he is actually finishing up practice with the guys. You can come in.” She motioned for you to come in.

“If you want, we can go out to the garage. That’s where they practice.”

You smiled, “Sure, why not.”

Ronnie nodded and took you out with her to the garage. As you walked in the guys were in the midst of a song, Josh was singing, Jake was playing guitar and there were two other boys. One looked similar to Jake, assuming it was another sibling of theirs. He was playing bass, and the other was playing drums. Ronnie and you had sat on the couch in front of them.

They sounded really good, for being so young. Josh had finally noticed you as a blush crept on his cheeks, he averted towards Jake as they finished up the song, and concluded their practice.

“That was better than the last run. We’ll resume back to this tomorrow.” Jake directed to them, “Sam, we got to tune that better. And Danny, we’ll have to try and rig the snare.”

They all nodded, making way to head into the house.

“I didn’t expect you to come out here.” Josh had chuckled softly.

“Ronnie asked if I wanted to. And figured why not.” You smiled softly, “So how many of you are there?” You whispered to him - in hopes that his siblings wouldn’t hear.

“There are four of us. Jake and I are the oldest, Ronnie is the middle and Sam is the youngest. And Danny, he's Sam’s best friend. But we consider him a brother, he’s been around for so long.” He smiled, a dimple peeking out.

“Dinner is probably ready, we should head in before my mother starts calling.” He chuckled softly, you followed behind him into the house. He led you to the dining room, it was big enough for everyone that was present. Once you stepped foot in, all eyes were on the two of you.

“Mom and Dad this is Y/N. She is new to our school, and my partner for our class project. But also a new friend.” He smiled at you.

“Oh it’s nice to meet you dear! It’s always great to meet one of Josh’s friends.” She beamed with excitement, “Please sit anywhere you’d like. I made grilled cheese and a family recipe of tomato soup.”

She motioned for you to sit. Josh pulled a chair out for you, that was next to Jake, and you sat down as Josh sat in the seat next to you.

➳

Everyone had eaten, and once your bellies were full to content. You and Josh had decided to head to his and Jake’s shared room to work on the project. Both sides were different from one another, Josh having anything film related where Jake had music related posters.

“Jake and I are forced to share a room, while Ronnie and Sam get the luxury of having their own rooms.” He chuckled softly motioning for you to sit on his bed as he sat on a chair from his desk.

“It’s okay, my sister and I were forced to share a room when we lived in Oregon.” You giggled softly remembering the tiny two bedroom house your parents had gotten when your father was stationed on a mission again.

“Oregon? How did you end up all the way here?” Josh chuckled softly.

“My dad was in the military. We moved around quite a lot.” You responded nonchalantly.

“Oh wow. So you’re settled here in Frankenmuth, Michigan?”

“It's a cute town.” You giggled softly.

“We’re really known for Christmas. Whole town goes overboard with all of it, really. But it is nice. I do enjoy Christmas here.” He rubbed his hands together.

“So where are you originally from?” He questioned you.

“Florida.” You said flatly.

Honestly, you didn’t miss it - especially given the fact you had lived close to Orlando for quite some time, you hated the tourists all year round for the 9 years you lived there.

“Sunshine state… Hm. I think I’ll nickname you Sunshine. How does that sound?” He chuckled softly, a blush crept on your face.

“Sure…”

“Now, what role are you trying for Mr.Kiszka?” You impersonated Mr.Kiwalski’s voice. Earning a chuckle from Josh he shook his towards you.

“Don’t laugh.” He chuckled, “But I’m going for Wonka.”

You smiled at him softly, “I think you’ll fit perfectly…you have the characteristics for it.” You giggled softly.

“And how about you?”

“Veruka.” You giggled, sitting up straight.

“Well I guess we’ll just wait and see.”

December 2013

Ever since that poetry class, you and Josh had been inseparable. You finished your project earning an easy A on it. And then got the roles you had both wanted for the Willy Wonka play. Josh had been working on a film script for the last couple weeks, having you help assist him with it.

“You know you are quite the genius Sunshine.” Josh smiled at you, you smiled back. “I’m just doing what I can! I told you I’ll help film, and help with costumes as well.”

You finished writing in your journal with all of the plans for Josh’s film that was coming up early next month.

“Do you think it’s silly?” He scratched the back of his head.

“No, not at all. I think it’s going to be brilliant. You have a very creative mind Josh. You need to stop doubting yourself.” You replied, shaking your head to give more reinforcement to your words.

“It’s just I care a lot about film, and this band stuff with Jake sometimes can be a lot…” He sighed, sitting on the edge of his bed.

“Josh… Jake has told you that he would help in any way.” You sat next to him.

“Yeah, but this is his dream… He’s always wanted to be a rockstar. And I want that for him. Me, I'm just a silly old film guy.” He chuckled as you nudged him softly.

“Aaand he would want the same for you. Don’t beat yourself up. This film is going to be amazing. Now come on, we have a Christmas party to attend.” You stood up, putting your hand out for him to join.

Once he took your hand in his, it felt like electricity had gone through you. During the short time you’ve known Josh. You’ve grown to like him more than just a friend…

He stood up from his bed, dropping your hand from his slowly.

“Yeah, you’re right. Thanks Y/N…” He smiled softly.

“Of course Josh, that’s what friends are for.” You smiled mentally slapping yourself. You wish you could tell him how you felt. But you also didn’t want to freak him out.

The two of you made way to the basement where the party was being held, Jake smiled and walked over to you giving you a tight hug. With how close you got to Josh, you got close to his twin as well.

“About time you two showed up. Was starting to think you were sucking face.”

Josh gave him a glare as his cheeks turned to a crimson. You blushed, staring at your feet. “No, we were just working on the last touches of the film Jacob.”

“Sorry…” He gave Josh an apologetic look, they had some sort of twin telepathy way of communicating. You just went with the flow of it all. Josh ventured off to some other film friends that you would eventually join.

“Hey I really didn’t mean to embarrass you guys…” Jake had spoken to you quietly.

“It’s okay Jake, really…” You fiddled with your hands.

“No, no it's not… Has Josh said anything to you lately?” You gave him a questioning look.

“Said what?” You grabbed a can of pop.

“Forget it…” Jake went to turn, you grabbed his arm.

“Jacob.”

“You can’t say anything.” Jake mumbled as he turned to face you.

You gave him a look, “Cross my heart and hope to die.” You giggled doing the little promise. He pulled you aside.

“Josh really likes you… But he’s just too afraid to admit it.” He said quietly to you, only audible for you to understand. You felt butterflies in your stomach.

“R-really…” You looked up at him.

“Yeah. Why do you think he’s been up your ass so much lately.” He chuckled softly, “But you didn’t hear this from me.” He gave you a stern look.

“Jake, I won’t say a word. Besides… He hasn’t even made a move…” You looked over at Josh watching him talk with your other friends.

“Give it time… He doesn’t really know how to go about these things. He might need a little push, but. He’ll do it.” He patted your back softly.

“Thanks Jake…” You smiled and walked over to your friends and talked about the plans for the new year.

January 2014

“Josh, how the hell did you book a hotel room for the weekend for this film? Don’t we have to be at least 21 to book?” You shot a glare as you settled your bags into the room.

“Sunny, you underestimate my skills… Have I taught you nothing.” He sighs, acting like he’s been hurt. “Okay. Maybe I did, but just a tiny bit.”

You giggled softly setting up your equipment - while Jake came into the room with the rest of their friends.

“Okay, so I totally did not cause a scene in the lobby…” He said nervously.

“Jacob, I swear if we get kicked out of this damn hotel before we even shoot anything. I’m kicking your ass.”

“Some idiot tried fucking with our equipment, what else was I suppose to do.” He defended himself, causing the two of them to bicker.

“Alright! It just better not result in anything bad…”

The remainder of the evening you had set the room up for the liking of how you were filming this short film that Josh had in mind. Jake was one of the main roles, along with their friend Grace. Filming was going great, you had everything pretty much under control so Josh could focus on filming and getting the right angles while you adjusted lighting, make up and props.

After a couple hours of shooting Josh figured it was time to call it a night. You had helped clean up the room while Jake and Grace had finished up their last shots, and proceeded to help clean as well. Josh had already started editing the clips from tonight, and said that we would pick it back up tomorrow.

The twins ended up sharing a bed, while you and Grace had shared the other. It's not like you and Josh haven’t slept by one another before. You had passed out on the pull out sofa bed in their basement a few times when you’d stay over late working on a project. But Jake didn’t want to make Grace uncomfortable.

➳

The next day filming had picked up, but Jake was in a mood as he was tired of filming the same scene for the past hour.

“Well Jacob if you’d actually put effort into it. We wouldn’t have to keep shooting this take!” Josh threw his hands up in frustration.

“How about we take a lunch break!” You suggested taking your headphones off.

“Yeah, that’s a great idea.” Jake huffed grabbing his things, “You want to hit that Sub shop Grace?”

She nodded in agreement following Jake, leaving you and Josh to yourselves. Josh had put some things away grabbing a microwave.

“Joshua, what are you doing with the damn microwave?” You crossed your arms staring at him.

“I want to make stir fry. And I’m not trying to burn the room down, so to the hallway we go!” He made his way to the door, but he could open it considering his hands were full. So you opened the door, following behind him with your camera and other supplies.

Deciding to sprint to be in front of him, you took a picture of him with the microwave. “You’re something else Kiszka.” You giggled, getting to the end of the hallway. He plugged the microwave into the outlet, preparing the meal he had planned.

“Is this even going to be any good?” You gave him a concerning look.

“You have to live on the edge, a little mama.” He chuckled, mixing it together and placing it into the microwave, turning it on and setting it to whatever time and power he had it set as.

“Sir, what are you doing?” One of the maids had questioned him.

“Just making a five star meal. Care for some?” He smiled.

“You can’t do that out here. Why is it even out of the room?” She had questioned him, with her arms crossed.

“What do you mean? It was already out here.” He played a great character.

“Sir, I can assure you that is the room microwave you need to put it back in its rightful place. Or I will have to report you to the hotel staff.” She huffed watching him.

“It’s almost done cooking. It’ll be out of the way shortly.” Josh replied, smirking.

“I suggest you take it back now.” She then started to walk away to clean a room. Josh sat there letting it continue to cook.

“Josh, she seemed pretty serious.” You looked at him with worry.

“Sunshine, you need to liven it up!” He chuckled softly, as the microwave went off he unplugged it and walked back to the room with it.

“You Kiszka’s sure have a way…” You giggled softly, sitting on the bed.

“I can’t tell if that’s a good thing, or a bad thing.” He chuckled softly sitting beside you with his plate, taking a bite he spit it out quickly. “Oh that is mortifying.” He made a gagging face.

“Not so bright Joshy…” You giggled softly.

“Come on, let’s go get some real stir fry.” You patted his back, he nodded, throwing out his creation.

➳

The two of you found a local Japanese restaurant not too far from the hotel. Taking in on dining there, you let Jake and Grace know where the two of you went in case they came back earlier than you two.

“So, the Valentine’s dance is coming up.” Josh had said nervously.

“Yeah, have you asked any special girl?” You smiled softly, taking a sip of your water.

“No, not yet…” He put his head down, like he was ashamed.

“It’s okay Josh, you don’t have to show up with a date. You can just go with friends.” You smiled softly at him.

“Uh actually. Y/N, I was wondering if maybe you would be my date for the Valentine’s dance.” He looked up at you nervously with flushed cheeks.

“You want me to be your date?” You smiled as your cheeks became a tinted pink.

He nodded, smiling softly, “Yeah. I’d really like it if you would?”

“Yeah, I’ll be your date…” You trailed off with a smile, giving him a small reassuring nod.

He smiled, chuckling softly, “I thought I was gonna walk out of here like a sore loser if you said no.”

“I would never say no to you Josh…”

February 2014

It was Friday, school was a complete drag the past week. They had a spirit week in honor of the Valentine’s dance tonight. Ever since Josh had asked you to be his date, the two of you had been inseparable. You had been working on the last touches of the short film you worked on together. It was nearing completion but Josh decided that the two of you should take this week off from editing, since the dance was taking up a majority of the time.

You had joined the student council prior to Christmas break, and helped the council decorate and plan the dance. It was senior year after all, you had to make some memories while living the last of your childhood. Josh knew how much it meant to you to partake in this, since you were never able to do much like this before.

You had been getting ready at home, finishing the last touches of your hair and makeup. You kept your makeup rather simple, not doing too much of a glam look, and your hair had some loose curls.

You went to your closet pulling your dress off from the hanger, it was an indigo dress that rested against your knees and had some slight rhinestone embellishments on the edges of the dress. You slipped it on looking at yourself in the mirror, content with your look you put your heels on and grabbed your small satchel heading downstairs.

Josh was at the bottom of the stairs waiting for you with your parents and sister.

“You look absolutely stunning.” Your mom beamed.

“You look amazing, sweetie.” Your dad chimed in, agreeing with your mother.

Your sister smiled, clapping her hands together. She opted on staying home instead of going to the dance tonight. She was in the same grade as Sam and Danny and you have tried multiple times to get her to hang out with them.

“You look beautiful, Sunshine.” Josh came in front of you holding a beautiful white rose assortment corsage, with a boutineer to go with it.

You smiled softly in response.

“You look dashing.”

Your mom smiled coming over to aid the two of you with putting his boutineer on. Then Josh slipped your corsage onto your wrist.

“Okay! In front of the fireplace, we have to get pictures of you two.” Your mom beamed, as your father ushered you into the living room. Josh and yourself stood in front of the fireplace, as he placed his hand on the small of your back you felt butterflies in your stomach placing your arm around his back. You both posed and smiled for the millions of pictures your mother insisted on taking. Then took a couple with your parents.

“Guys it's not even prom, it's just a regular dance!” You giggled softly after taking enough pictures.

“Yes you’re right dear, but it’s your senior year!” Your mom beamed at you.

“We should really get going, otherwise we’ll be late…” You looked at the time.

“Wouldn’t be the first time I’m late to a function!” Josh chuckled softly, you giggled in agreement.

“Yeah, but I think for once you should be on time.” You smirked and started to head to the door with him.

Before leaving your father gave Josh a whole spiel on his rules and when to have you home by. Typical dad move, but he just wanted to be in good hands.

“Dad, he’s a good guy. Besides I think Mrs.Kiszka would be on him if he didn’t abide by your rules.” You giggled softly as Josh nodded.

“Yeah, my mom would have my butt canned.”

The two of you then left your house, he opened the passenger side to his car letting you get in before he closed it getting to his side. Once you buckle your seatbelt he had gotten into the car buckling himself in the driving over.

After arriving, Josh had parked next to Jake’s car. Jake had gotten out and let his date out of the passenger side. He had asked Valerie to be his date, she was more than thrilled when he had asked her. Valerie was this sweet junior who was a part of the cheerleading squad and Jake was absolutely crushing on her.

“You guys look amazing!” You smiled at them, hugging Jake and then Val.

“You guys look great too!” Jake beamed.

“Well we should head in, it’s freezing out here.” Josh had motioned for everyone to make their way, as he kept his hand on the small of your back.

Once you entered the high school gymnasium there was a photo station off to the left, then a table for water and punch.

“Do you want some punch?” Josh looked over at you.

“Yeah, I’d like some.” You smiled.

“Grab a table and I’ll meet you there.” He wandered off to the refreshment table as you made way to a small table in the corner. Jake and Val had already ventured to the dance floor, making the most of their night.

Josh had returned with two cups of punch, setting yours down in front of you on the table, he smiled softly at you.

“My lady.” He chuckled softly, sliding into the chair beside you.

“Well thank you kind sir.” You giggled softly, taking a sip of the punch.

“You guys did really well with planning all of this.” He smiled, taking a sip of his punch.

“Thank you, I was nervous they weren’t going to like my ideas…” You slouched a bit - suddenly feeling a wave of nervousness hit you.

“Are you kidding! Sunny you are brilliant. Who wouldn’t like your ideas?” He smiled softly at you, you returned a smile as your cheeks flushed.

After conversing for a bit, the two of you decided to hit the dance floor joining Jake and Val. You guys had danced the night away, laughing and acting like complete idiots. But it’s all you ever wanted at this moment.

The DJ then turned things slow for a remainder of the evening starting off with All of Me by John Legend. Josh had you pulled you close to him, wrapping his arms around your waist and you wrapped your arms around his neck. Smiling softly at him, you giggled to yourself softly.

“What is it, Sunshine?” He chuckled softly, catching your giggle.

“Nothing…” You blushed, placing your head on his chest listening to his heartbeat as the two of you swayed.

“Your heart is beating rather fast Josh…”

You giggled and turned to look up at him, he then moved his one hand to caress your face.

“Y/N…”

You looked at his face, he licked his lips nervously.

“Yeah Josh…”

He studied your face, before zoning in closer he then pressed his soft plush lips against yours.

‘Cause I give you all of me

And you give me all of you’

You were taken by surprise, but immediately kissed him back softly letting your lips move in sync. Soaking in this moment together. After a moment the two of you pulled away, smiling while giggling at each other.

“God, I’ve wanted to do that for so long…” He shook his head, sighing softly.

“I think you should do it again.” You smiled brightly at him - he then captured your lips once more with his, giving a few little pecks before detaching his lips from yours.

“Y/N… I. Well, what I’m trying to ask.”

“Yes, Josh. I’ll be your girlfriend.” You giggled softly, rubbing his arm to soothe his nerves.

to be continued

Taglist -

@lyndszee @laneygvf @sacredthefran @starcatcherry @fkfearandliveyourlegend @hi-hi-hello11 @gretnavannfleet @themoreyou-love @gvfmuse @meetingthestardust @myleftsock

#greta van fleet #gvf #greta van smut #gvf smut #josh kiskza fanfic #josh greta van fleet #josh kiszka series #josh kiszka #josh kiszka fluff #josh kiszka fic #josh kiszka x y/n #josh kiszka smut #josh kiszka x reader #josh gvf #josh gvf smut

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obetrolncocktails · 2 years ago

Text

Deception | Josh Kiszka X Reader | Part 1

Warnings: This fic will include angst and smut. If those aren't your thing, don't read! Minors DNI!

Word Count: 2.1K

Authors Note: I had a hurtful, but oh so deliciously angsty idea for a fic involving Josh and a reader who was a fan, and led josh on to believe that they met naturally in a grocery store.

Summary: Be careful what you wish for. Wishes answered always come with consequences.

His sheets smelled of fresh linen, like fresh clothes pulled from a clothesline, crisp with the scent of sunshine. You’d burrowed yourself into them like a cocoon of welcome warmth, wrapping yourself in the swaths of fabric.

“For someone who claims to be so hot all the time, you sure look like you’re ready to hibernate,” Josh mused, strolling into the bedroom as he sipped from the lip of a large mug. He was prepared, having made you one as well. You offered him a gentle smile.

“I’m comfy,” you replied, satisfied with the simplicity of your response.

“Sit up, silly,” He said, lowering himself onto the bed, carefully handing you your piping-hot cup of coffee. Wisps of steam billowed over the top of the mug and you sipped tentatively at the liquid, feeling it instantly liven your body from head to toe.

“How does it feel to be twenty-six years and three hundred and sixty-four days old?” you asked him, eyeing him from over the lip of the cup.

“Geez, when you say it like that, you make me sound ancient,” he chuckled. You loved the way his lips curled upward when he grinned, revealing his brilliant, white teeth. The slight gap between his front two teeth always sent flutters through your body. You caught yourself admiring his delicate, but masculine features. “But I’m excited! I never thought I’d end up planning my own birthday party.” He looked at you with amusement.

“Come on. You mean to tell me you didn’t enjoy designing your own birthday cake?” You said, taking another long swig of your coffee before lowering it to your lap as you crossed your legs. “Only you would choose that symbol.”

His widening grin told you all you needed to know. “Yeah, that was pretty cool.” His eyes glimmered with child-like amusement, which sent a pang through your chest. “I’m just glad that everyone can make it, you know? It’s hard these days to get everyone in one place at the same time.”

You nodded, reaching to place the cup on the bedside table. “Sam, Danny and I made sure that everyone could make it.” You ruffled your messy hair with your fingertips, watching him finish off his coffee. “We threatened physical violence if they didn’t.”

“Okay, but who’s the one throwing the punches?” Josh asked, his eyebrows raised with amusement.

“Who do you think?” You answered, lifting your fists playfully in front of you. “They don’t want it, I promise you.”

“Put your guns away,” He chuckled. “I bet you Jake is gonna be so jealous,” He continued, setting his cup on the side table before moving back to lay on the bed and prop up his head on his hand. His eyes brightened, his cheeks filling with color.

“Of what?” You asked, taking another sip of your coffee.

“My party.” He said lightly.

“I mean, you are the more performative of the two, so…” You admitted. He turned to you, scoffing incredulously.

“Now what is that supposed to mean?” He asked, gawking. He couldn’t hide, though, that his features were fighting the urge to twist into a ridiculous smirk. His eyes seemed to glitter as he questioned you.

“Nothing!” You said, rolling out of bed with your empty coffee cup.

“No, no! You don’t get off that easy,” Josh said, pulling at the thin fabric of your sleep shorts, pulling you back closer to him.

“Oh , you want me to say sorry?” You asked him, biting your bottom lip as your eyes glimmered with mischief.

“I thought maybe you could show me you’re sorry instead,” he said. “Come here.”

You obeyed him, leaning closer to him. “Yes sir.”

The intensity in his eyes deepened as his fingertips pulled upward to gently caress your chin and jaw, drawing your face forward to meet with his lips. The feeling of his touch ignited the heat between your thighs. Josh’s boyish features could easily morph in the matter of seconds into something almost siren-like—He naturally honed the ability to unconsciously will you to do anything for him with just a look. He harnessed the power to peer straight through your soul like glass, like he could somehow see all of you at once, including your every thought, worry, and desire. At the beginning of the relationship, it had made you feel extremely vulnerable and unguarded, but now? Now, you found comfort in him knowing everything about you. Well, almost everything. There were certain things that you weren’t ready to tell him yet. You’d wait for the right time to come clean.

You gave in to the gentle caress of his velvet lips and folded your body into an innate dance, moving in an exact mirror to him as he explored you. “You want me to show you just how sorry I am?” You whispered against his parted lips, your voice barely more than a huff of breath as your instincts began to take over. His hands slid to your hips, pulling you against him. You took that as his answer.

“Go right ahead,” he purred softly. It was moments like these when you’d often felt most vulnerable in front of a man. In most of your previous relationships, you’d been so reluctant to let your partners in, to see the most vulnerable, insecure, and sensitive parts of yourself. You’d built your walls with an impenetrable defense, constructed by so many years of hating your own body more than anyone else could. Recently, it was becoming clearer to you that there was one thing that you knew for sure about Josh. He silently set himself apart from everyone else. Not once had he ever judged you for your appearance; for the extra curves, the extra pounds, the imperfect folds and creases that were so ugly to you, but so perfect to him. Even so, he didn’t feel pity for you, either. He treated you like a person, not the fragile pane of glass you had let yourself become in the hands of so many past partners’ hands. Not a single interaction was laced with unspoken judgment, because the truth was simple. Being fat meant nothing to Josh.

You remembered those first days when Josh all but begged you to stop apologizing for the things that you couldn’t and shouldn’t change, constantly reminding you that you were a beautiful woman. “You are allowed to take up space in this world. Stop apologizing for abiding in it, Y/n. You have nothing to worry about when you’re with me,” he had said to you after a few dates, when you’d make it a point to apologize or somehow discount your appearance or importance. You couldn’t help it. It had become the safest defense mechanism that you could create; you’d insult yourself before anyone else could beat you to it.

You let yourself fall after those first few weeks, and unsurprisingly, it was one of the easiest decisions you had ever made. The loop of his fingers around yours began to feel so natural and reassuring. You could count on him to encourage you to try new things, to leave you in stitches from laughing, and at the end of the night, you could rest assured that he’d leave you thinking about him for every moment he wasn’t with you.

“What are you thinking about?” He asked, the corners of his lips twitching upward in a curious smile.

“You,” you answered honestly, reaching forward to tuck some of his curls behind his ear.

“Oh no,” he answered, his cheeks flushing. “Should I be running for cover?” He asked, pretending to get up.

“No, no, come back here,” you said, pulling at his arm. You let the moment settle into contented silence as you both let your gaze linger between each other. “Can I tell you something?”

“Always. What’s up?” Josh asked, moving to caress your arm softly as you prepared to speak. You pulled yourself upward to sit straight on the bed, and he did the same, sitting in front of you.

“You are–” you paused for a moment, figuring out the next words before speaking again. “You are the closest thing I’ve had to a home in a very, very long time, and I think I’m ready.” You both had agreed that sex wasn’t expected in the relationship until you had told him so, and even then, with Josh, you knew that you wanted it to be special when it was time.

“Ready for?” He asked, his eyes widening slightly. You watched his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed.

“I am ready to be with you. I am ready to have sex, if and when you are.” You pulled your gaze upward to look him in the eye. “I want to be yours completely, Josh. You make me feel beautiful, and I think I am beginning to believe it, too.” The words spilled out of you easily, because for the first time, you believed them.

“You are truly marvelous,” he spoke, straightening to sit cross legged again on the bed. “I am a lucky man, and I gotta say. Thank God we love the same pasta sauce.” You couldn’t help but chuckle as he recounted your first meeting at Kroger. You had been choosing between pasta sauces, and couldn’t decide whether to stay with your tried-and-true selection or try something new.

“You want this one,” he had said, pointing to the one in your right hand–the one that was your favorite. You looked up, and were automatically struck by his natural beauty–the mixture of feminine and masculine features which were combined in an almost artistic product. You couldn’t look him in the eye, and you certainly couldn’t talk straight.

“What?” You said after a long moment, yanking yourself out of your daze. “Oh. Yeah, this one? You said, raising the jar in the air. “It’s my favorite. Don’t break it if it isn’t fixed–right?” You decided to keep your mouth shut rather than fix the saying that you had just butchered so badly. Josh laughed, reaching for a jar of his own off of the shelf.

“Something like that, yeah.” His dimples were huge, and his teeth were so white they almost seemed to sparkle. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. For a moment, you forgot how to swallow, how to talk, how to breathe. How are you real? You remembered thinking to yourself.

“Sorry, I’m just a little–frazzled. I’m Y/n.” you said, stupidly extending your hand to him.

“Don’t worry, Y/n. Grocery shopping can really take it out of us,” he said, taking your hand. You were grateful for his skillful segue. “I’m Josh.”

You nodded. “Nice name,” you told him before mentally kicking yourself in the head. You’d wished you’d worn steel toes, and also that you had crazy flexibility so you could kick yourself across the pasta aisle. God I’m so fucking dumb.

“I’d say yours is far more lovely,” he said, saving you again, and you couldn’t save the heat from filling your face. You were becoming intensely aware of your insecurities as you felt his eyes float over your body and back up to your face.

“Thank you,” you said quietly, feeling anxiety exploding through your system like a disturbed hornet’s nest.

“Well, I hope your pasta turns out delicious,” he said. “I can tell you’ve got great taste,” he said, putting the jar in his small hand basket.

“You too,” you said with a gentle smile. “Only losers eat Prego,” you said with a grin.

“That’s a bold statement, Y/n. We need to make sure that Campbell’s Soup Company isn’t listening to our every word.” You couldn’t help but snicker, accidentally snorting at the stupid joke.

“Stupid joke?” he asked, reading your mind.

“Yeah, I gotta admit. It was a terrible joke,” you said, your cheeks aching painfully from grinning.

“Ah well, I’m known for them, so,” he shrugged, adjusting his basket in the crook of his elbow. “Well, I guess I’ll see you around, Y/n. If I see you next time, maybe we’ll compare ingredients again.”

“I’m ready for you,” Josh said. “I’ve known it’s you for a while now,” he admitted, reaching forward to take your hands in his. “I want to make it special,” He continued. “Let me make you dinner. You already know what’s on the menu, besides you, of course,” he said with a soft grin.

“Josh Kiszka’s world famous Spaghetti?” You said, eyeing him with a smirk.

“You know it!” He said excitedly. “Come here, let me kiss you.”

You obeyed him instantly, leaning forward into his awaiting embrace, letting yourself be truly loved for the first time.

You heard a buzz from your phone on the side table, but ignored it.

You’re a whore for going after the celebrities you write such filthy smut about. I’ve found you, and it’s only a matter of time before everyone finds out about your little secret. Could be fun, don’t you think?

End of part 1.

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littlemisslipbalm · 1 year ago

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Demonology: Me & My Dog

Series Summary: A new demon has come to Nashville. Josh and Jake's ways of life have been thrown off by her arrival. The angel and demon have lived with an understanding of one another, but with Y/N stirring up trouble and asking questions, they're forced to work out a new normal. And why is she so powerful for a human turned demon anyway, that's unusual, right?

Jake Kiszka x f!reader and Josh Kiszka x f!reader

A/N: This will be at least three parts! This first part is more about Josh and the reader, the second will be more Jake and then we will see with part 3 what is to happen. Please let me know what you think with comments and reblogs and messages to my inbox!! I want to talk about this bc I have been so excited to share it!!

Word Count: 5.4k | Warnings: alcohol consumption, strong language, allusions to sex - minor descriptions of sex but not descriptive smut (still 18+!!), dubious comprehension of angel/demon mythology, like this is fiction fr so if it does not make sense i am sorry but idc (but am also open to suggestions thx)

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Part 1: My & My Dog

When being told to stir up some trouble on Earth, Y/N was more annoyed that she had to go back at all than excited that she was moving up in the ranks. Afterall, she’d only died 50 years ago. It was already time to go back? She thought she had eternity down here.

From what she’d heard from other members of the underworld, it’d just gotten worse since she’d left. Prior to 1976 had been a riot for her (1976 was not her favorite, but dying usually wasn’t in people’s top ten greatest moments), but now it sounds worse than Hell itself.

Still, like a good little demon soldier, she trudged through the dim back rooms to find the dull office that would provide her with the necessary documents to take a corporeal form and inhabit the physical sphere for an extended period of time.

“Can I bring my dog?” She asks, kicking at a piece of garbage on the floor. It littered the entire ground around her feet.

“Dog?” The servant of hell inquired.

“Chupacabra,” She corrects.

“Sure,” Their eyes raise from filling out the paperwork to the little animal beside her. “Extra form you need to both sign. Says he’ll suck the blood of at least five animals per earthly week while he’s there. We don’t do ESAs here.”

“Fab,” She sighed in relief and scratched behind the ears of her dog that she had re-encountered shortly after arriving in Hell.

The chupacabra placed his paw in some mysterious blood that had formed in the pewter catch-all dish sitting beside the papers and then pushed it onto the form. Signed, sealed and soon to be delivered. They were getting out of Hell.

When she materialized on Earth, she wasn’t sure where she was exactly. The home office didn’t give that information, you just had to figure it out yourself. She had been hoping for her hometown of Los Angeles or another major city center she’d never been to before. Maybe London or Tokyo would be a fun change of pace.

After walking what felt like 20 miles, but was probably half of that given that she wasn’t used to physical legs anymore, she came upon a sign as to where she was. A mural to be exact.

It had only been woods and fields for the first half, but then there were more buildings. Coffee shops, bagel shops and something that was called a ‘Vape’ shops. Everything advertised themselves as historic music sites. But it wasn’t until 1504 Demonbreun St. that she fully ascertained she was in the heart of Nashville, Tennessee.

“Welcome to Nashville”

“Fuck yeah,” She smiled. A friend back in the day had been from here and told her about it a few times. It wasn’t a major capital city or home, but it was a city alright. And where there was nightlife, she was sure there could be trouble.

She spent the rest of the day checking around her surroundings. Finding the place Hell had given her to lodge in. It wasn’t much but she remembered earthly delights and planned to spruce it up, give it a vibe. She wrote a note on the wall with a deep red pen she had brought with her a list of items she needed. Couch, rug, bed, posters, an electric guitar and lots of wine and clothes. The ink dripped down the wall and she smiled, swiping at it and placing it to her lips.

She passed the rest of the daylight hours with great displeasure for the living people around her who barely seemed to notice her. Not that she looked any different than them, but it just bothered her that no one was as friendly as when she’d last been here. No one bothered to say ‘hello’, all they did was stare or talk into their rectangular devices she had realized were portable telephones half way through the day.

Broadway St. seemed to be the place Y/N thought she’d find the most possible trouble. It was lit up like the Sunset and if it weren’t for all the horribly dressed people surrounding her, she would’ve felt right at home.

At one of the bars, she got free shots from the bartender with a flash of her eyes. From the regular dark brown iris, they flashed an entire eternal glassy black. He smiled dreamily in the abyss and walked away after she winked at him. She swung back the shots and made her way to the dance floor.

Raising her hands above her head, she began to dance. Her black lace dress hugged her curves and shifted with her. Her silver jewelry glinted dangerously as she moved. The lights in the bar shifted to stay red instead of the flashing multi-colors that had bothered her when she entered. She moved her hips to the music and slowly it transformed from a poppy song she didn’t know to Led Zeppelin.

Robert Plant’s voice got everyone dancing the way they should and the vapes transformed into cigarettes and she smiled to herself feeling alive for the first time in a long time. Maybe being back wasn’t so bad. She drank more and danced more and saw people getting drunk and making out in corners and thought debauchery worked as trouble. Job done for the day.

She relaxed into the sway of the music, writhing around like a snake as her skin grew dewey with perspiration. A tug at her arm brought her out of her euphoric state. All night she had made sure no one would bother her, but whoever this was didn’t seem to follow her rules.

She opened her eyes, fully black once more as she stared at who was holding her wrist. She tugged back but his hold was secure. He pulled her to the side of the dancefloor, a space conveniently opening up.

“Get your hands off me! What the fuck, man?”

“You can’t be here,” He spoke calmly.

She narrowed her eyes at him. He had on a white plain t-shirt and light wash jeans, with opalescent beads hanging around his neck. His eyes were an oddly familiar light brown. His hair was shaved on the sides, creating a sort of mullet that she mildly appreciated if he hadn’t been so rude as to pull her away from her fun. That mullet exposed the golden earrings in his pointy ears.

There was something different about him. None of it was in his physical form but she felt it, vibrating and extending around him. As if he had invisible light passing around and through him even in the dark dingy bar lighting.

“Says who?” She finally tugged her arm free from his hold and crossed her arms across her chest, pressing her breasts up in the process.

His eyes flicker to the movement before pressing his lips into a thin line “Says me.”

She rolled her eyes, unimpressed. “And you are?”

“Joshua. I protect this town," he says. He wrings his hands around the gold bracelets on his wrists. “You can’t come into these bars and just mess with everything about them. It’s wrong.”

“Yes I can, Josh,” She smirks. “I’m a demon as you clearly already can tell. I can do whatever I want.”

“Oh my God,” Josh sighs, exasperated already. “There’s already a demon here.” He knew the other one quite well and was at least able to keep him in check. A newcomer would mean more work.

She shrugged. “Not my problem, angel. Hell sent me up here, guess they’re not happy with the other one’s performance.”

She moved to go back to the bar for another drink when Josh looked like he was a million miles away. He’d really killed her buzz. Josh’s mentioning of another demon made her stop and ask as an afterthought: “What’s this other demon’s name?”

“Jacob–er, uh, Jake,” Josh corrects himself. He hadn’t gone by Jacob since, well, since before, even if Josh wished he could just call him Jacob.

“Groovy.” Her smile is wicked, her lips painted a red so deep it resembled dried blood. “Displeasure meeting you, angel. Come find me if you ever want to have a real good time.” She kissed his cheek before disappearing behind a group of people.

Two weeks later, Y/N was seated on a bench in the park with her legs kicked up. She looked like she was a dead body–which more or less, she was, but the way she was sitting was unusual for someone who was supposedly alive. Her dog was perched unnaturally along the backrest, soaking in the sun he had missed. They looked out of place.

She had come out in the midday to see if she could start any fights in the park. She’d quickly learned that malfunctions with their little handheld phones really upset the modern humans so she liked to mess with wifi and electrical connections every odd day or so just to keep up the no-good work.

Her black RayBans covered her eyes as they surveyed the green grass for potential targets for a bit of a row. She sat as far away from the people as possible, so she had enhanced her vision as if using a zoom function. But soon something white blocked her vision.

“Angel,” She practically growled. Her dog actually growled, sitting up.

“Mind if I sit,” Josh asks pleasantly, eyeing the dog with caution. It looked like a normal dog, but a clip in his right ear and a strange red shimmer in his eyes made Josh think there might be something hellish about him.

She took her feet off the bench and pushed her sunglasses up off of her face. “Finally want a taste of what you’re missing?”

“No,” he states flatly. His eyes were still wandering between the creature and the demon. She was dressed in all black, typical. The dog was between cream and the lightest brown he’d ever seen, atypical. “Is this your dog?”

“Yeah.” She smiles softly for the first time. Her hand goes to pet him between his ears and down his small snout. “He was waiting for me in Hell back’n the day. They made him a chupacabra for me as a ‘Welcome to Hell’ present.”

Josh’s eyes widened in surprise. What had she done in life to receive a present in Hell? “They like you down there?”

“Eh…I think I’m just a descendant of many a troublemaker. They knew I’d be an asset, especially when I arrived so early.”

Her dog slipped into her lap. For a moment, he shifted as he stared at Josh. Big ruby eyes glowered at him, all his hair was gone, leaving something more resembling a pale soft dog-rat. Disturbing and wretched, nonetheless. He wrinkled his nose at Josh.

Josh tried to smile, feeling awkward. Jake had insisted he find this demon Josh had encountered, needing more information about whether he was really in trouble or if it was procedural. Why Jake wouldn’t do it himself, Josh never got as many answers as questions he asked.

“Do either of you have names?”

She grinned. “Is this twenty questions? Why so interested in me?”

“Just want to get to know my opposition,” Josh says lightly, praying for her to feel extra kind today. Afterall, she was a demon who was originally human and it was only a little while ago from what she seemed to like. He was pretty sure she’d only been down in Hell for 50-60 years, that was barely a human lifetime—and yet it was longer than hers. Far less than Jake. Maybe he could neutralize her, get her to see the bright side.

“His name is Rune, now, but it used to be Rori.” She rubs over the dog’s hair, happy that he was softer on Earth. “He responds to both–for me. Not sure what he should be called now we’re back.”

Josh waited patiently. The breeze was cooler than usual and looking at her, he had to assume it was her as well. She seemed far too powerful for a run-of-the-mill demon who used to be human. But she also seemed extremely unlikely to answer his questions if he got too personal.

With her eyes uncovered, Josh watched them move around as she thought about something. It was almost like she was tracking something or doing some long form math equation in her head. Like she didn’t know what her name was and was looking for the answer.

“Mine…well, now you can call me Sal.” She winks and Josh straightens in his seat, feeling strange. “Gonna write about me in your diary now, Joshua?”

Josh pretends to laugh with a clipped “ha ha.” She smirked again, sliding closer to Josh on the bench. Rori grew annoyed and hopped off her lap, slinking off to climb a tree in hopes of finding a squirrel. Sal extended a delicate hand to Josh’s shoulder, beginning to play with the fabric of his shirt. He smiled tightly, not having anywhere to go if he wanted more answers.

“You said you arrived early?” Josh’s voice is high as he feels her touch moving down his arm. Thankfully, being an angel kept him from feeling her entire influence, but her physical touch was enough to feel something…unholy. He didn’t want to imagine her abilities on mortals. “What did you mean?”

“You’re fun,” She beamed. “If I show you some tricks I picked up in Hell, will you show me something?”

“It depends what you want to see,” Josh tries to be diplomatic.

Her head throws back in laughter. “Not that. No, I want you to want me to see that.” Her hand wanders to his wrist and toys with the bracelet before slinking to his thigh. Her voice was low and sultry, lips pressed to his ear. “Desperately.”

Josh was starting to feel like he might have to leave. His breathing had turned shallow and he couldn’t stop staring at the carnelian stone hanging between her breasts. Her hand’s touch left him and she laughed again bringing him out of his reverie.

“Hell, you’re pretty cute…I was a 27 club member.” She shrugged, turning away from Josh to stare out at the people again. “Had my heyday in the late 60s/early 70s and went out the same way I lived. Fast.”

Josh thought about the 60s and the 70s. He’d admit those decades were a bit of a guilty pleasure for him. Nashville had been fun, not as crowded. He watched her again, seeing her eyes narrow looking at the couples and the groups of friends.

“You weren’t from here?”

“LA. Broadway’s kinda like the Sunset Strip, just a bit more loser-y…NashVegas, just like Liv said.”

Josh was about to protest, but refrained, letting her reminisce. She did miss her friends from back then. They’d gotten up to so much trouble. Sometimes too much.

“Best of times, worst of times kind of thing y’a dig?” She tapped the heel of her boot like she was trying to shake off something unpleasant. “Just glad I had my dog for most of the time. He followed me everywhere and everyone’d let ‘im in because he was such a doll. Died ‘bout three years ‘fore me.”

The more she spoke the more her accent of a bygone era of California popped up. Josh couldn’t deny how sweet she sounded when she spoke about that thing, demonic as the pair of them were.

“How long’ve you’ve been up–er, down here?” She asked, barely realizing she had to correct for him.

Josh cast his eyes to the sky, thinking. “Since the beginning. That’s like, 8000 human years, I believe.”

“Get the fuck outta town!” She exclaimed, jumping in her seat to face him. Her eyes were alight with hellfire. “You’re a proper angel then?”

Josh chuckled. “They don’t really take new hires upstairs, I’m afraid. Only very special occasions. It doesn’t happen much these days.”

She regarded him for a moment, inventorizing him again now that she deemed him far more interesting than before. “Yeah, I was on a special list when I came down. Only a few others in my line, everyone else had to wait in this huge waiting room. It was…repulsive and I’ve been in the alley behind the Whisky.”

Josh tilted his head, looking over her once more. He felt like he should know her, but he couldn’t understand from where. She looked so familiar. Her hair seemed to shift every so often and he couldn’t be sure if it was the light or mood dependent. He didn’t prod at her mentioning the special treatment in Hell, didn’t want to alert her to the fact, that from what he knew, that was extremely rare.

“Have you told your demon friend about me yet?” She asked.

“He’s not my friend,” Josh responds automatically.

Her eyebrows raise as she turns her head back to him, scanning him for understanding. A killer upon its prey.

“Secret lover?” She guesses.

Josh can’t hide his face of disgust. “Jesus! No!”

“Homophobic?” She asks with a look of distaste. Not being for the gays was so not groovy. Half the musicians she hung out with back in the day were gay. And she wasn’t one for choosing when it came to sexuality.

“No!” Josh cries. “I am more than an ally to that cause, not that angels really have sexualities…it’s just.” He sighs, rubbing at his neck confusion. “He was, is–I don’t know, my twin.”

“Oh!” She beams, eyes once again lighting up in intrigue. She enjoyed learning things, it helped for using it against people at the end of the day. “So he’s also a proper demon. Fell and all that.”

“Yeah, don’t remind me.” He sounded pained, as if he was reliving the entire thing.

“Wow…” She blows out a breath. “That must be funky.”

She continued when Josh said nothing. “Y’know ‘cause he’s your brother but also he’s–” She finished her statement by sticking her pointer fingers through her hair and wiggling them around.

“Yes, I am aware.” Josh shakes his head.

She stood up and stretched her arms over her head, revealing her stomach below the flowy lace top she was wearing. “Great catch up, I guess, angel. Wanna trade tricks later? I’ve already worked through most of the main bars here and I’m getting bored.” Nothing was keeping her interest, since every place she had to transform into her liking.

“You want to hang out with me? You want to hang out with an angel?”

She grinned, turning around herself once before dropping her arms and stalking back towards Josh, standing directly in front of him. She leaned over him, watching him straighten his neck and swallow thickly. His eyes flickered from her face to the carnelian again.

“Everyone else is too easy around here. I need a challenge.” Her lips were right in front of his. “You seem like the perfect remedy for a wayward soul like me.”

Josh wasn’t exactly sure why he agreed to meet the demon at some speakeasy she said she needed to try. He wasn’t fully sold on calling her ‘Sal’, something about it felt off to him. She didn’t even really seem to care for it either. Jake, he knew, was vehement that he wished to be called Jake.

Jake was probably why he had come to the back door of a pizza joint that was actually the door to the underground speakeasy. He’d asked for more information on her. When Josh had inquired why Jake couldn’t just do it himself, his twin finally fessed up that he was actually not currently in Nashville at all. Leaving the heavy lifting to Josh, like always.

Begrudgingly, Josh entered another bar with plans to meet a demon. Heaven forgive him. It was smokey inside the brick-walled cavern. Small candles lit the tabletops and narrow bar top. A small dance floor was packed as people danced slowly to a jazz band. In the corner of the room, he saw her hair almost glowing in the dark and he made his way over.

She was dressed in a black pantsuit, with no undershirt, just a black lace bra and her same necklace. Rori wasn’t present, from what Josh could see, but based on their conversation earlier he had a feeling the demon dog was around, lurking.

She groaned when she saw what Josh was wearing.

“Angel, man, do you have any other clothes besides that?” She shook her head in disappointment.

“Of course I do,” Josh huffed, looking down at his clothes not understanding what was wrong with them.

“Change.”

“I can’t perform miracles just to change my outfit. That’s wrong.”

“That’s wrong, it’s wrong,” She parrots what she thought was becoming Josh’s mantra. “God, Heaven sounds so stifling.” She rolled her eyes and snapped her fingers with impatience.

In an instant, Josh was dressed in a red velvet jumpsuit with sequins around the neckline. His arms were on full display, muscles bulging while the velvet hugged his torso and lengthened his height. He smooths at his hair and feels something come off his skin. On his hand, he sees glitter. He looks at her again and then down at his new clothes. She was eyeing the bulge veering to his right thigh.

“Much better.” She grins.

Josh rolls his hand in front of him quickly, almost like a benediction, and once again his outfit has changed. Now, he was in a cream and grey jumpsuit that was far less flashy of his own with his favorite sigil emblazoned on the chest. He left the glitter and sat down.

Her unamused look makes Josh feel a little hot with shame.

“A little miracle to make sure I don’t look like a demon can be forgiven.”

“You looked foxy but whatever.” She rolls her eyes and flicks a hand at the table, producing a bottle of red wine for both of them. “You drink, surely. C’mon, don’t act like your demon brother hasn’t corrupted a few of those precious angel feathers.”

Josh can’t help the smile that falls over his face. Not sure what was so endearing about her at this moment. The romantic jazz might have something to do with it. He loved jazz. He takes the drink gratefully and they sip in companionable silence. She was subdued.

With one bottle down, they start a second and this is when she offers to show Josh a trick if he’ll show her something again. He shrugs in compliance, feeling well on his way to drunk.

“But won’t the other people in here see?” He adds.

“No, they all know to mind their own business. Plus, it’s dark in here.” She winks and suddenly Josh is staring at only her head.

He can seriously only see her head and neck. She moves closer to him and now Josh is certain, she’s made her body disappear. She was a dishonest-to-god floating head. Her head glowed gold for a moment as she twirled in a complete 360 to really show herself off. Josh’s eyes were as wide as possible trying not to cry out in amazement. Then the rest of her body reappeared, straddling Josh’s lap. With her arms draped over his shoulder, her all black soulless eyes gazed into Josh’s, practically paralyzing him with her fiery warmth and intensity.

“So what do you think, angel?”

“I, uh,” Josh stuttered. He placed his hands firmly on her hips and moved her off of him. “That’s impressive. What’s it good for?”

“S just fun,” She shrugged, undetered by Josh removing her from his lap. “Let’s dance and then you can show me your wings or something.”

Josh didn’t have time to protest, as she grabbed his wrist with one hand and their second bottle of pinot noir in the other.

She took a swig before letting it float in the air beside them. Her body swiveled around the dance floor, placing herself in Josh’s arms as he swayed respectfully. She sighed and sunk into the movement, drinking from the bottle every so often. When the song changed, she turned to face Josh, handing the wine to him. He drank obediently, which she felt was a triumph.

Hands draped over his shoulders again, she pressed her body against his. He was strong, she could feel his toned stomach. Her regular eyes met his and she tipped her nose against his. He looked stoicly back at her, determined to be friendly but not fall into the trap she was so clearly laying for him.

“You’ve got so many defenses up,” She whispers. “Why not do what you want for once? Loosen up. Indulge.”

Josh smiles down at her and moves his lips to her ear. Polite as ever, he speaks soothingly. “I am having a lovely time with you, Sal.”

She groans, pressing his hands to her hips again, where the curve of her ass was. “I can gaurantee you’ve never had what I’m offering you…”

Josh smiles knowingly, unconvinced. “I’m afraid I’m above your temptations. Is seduction your main area of expertise?”

She glares at him, but there’s a glint in her eye. She loved the chase. The difficulty.

“Debauchery in general, but with how many people wanted to have sex with me in my first life I have a specialization in seduction and desire.”

He shrugs, moving his hands to a respectful place on her waist. His touch is light, but she feels the pressure of his thumbs pushing at the exposed skin. She smirks and snakes her lips up to his ear.

The gold hoop glints and she flicks her tongue over it. “I could just show you what you’re missing. If you’d allow me to put it in your mind, we wouldn’t actually do it. You’d be in complete control. Halo intact. C’mon just a few images…it’ll be informative.”

Josh sighs as the tug of her teeth on his earring. She was bad. Terribly good at her job. He understood why she was here. Jake wasn’t even in town. Damn him. If he did his job a little better, Josh wouldn’t be contemplating allowing a demon into even a small recess of his mind. But, Jesus, did he want to just see it. If it wasn’t real, it wasn’t really a sin to indulge.

She stares at him, waiting for his response. Her hands run over his shoulders and chest. The music swells and Josh’s hands tighten on her waist as he looks up to the ceiling, praying for forgiveness.

“For educational purposes,” He starts and she grins. “I will allow you to show me how you do your job. So that I may be able to thwart your wrongdoings better.”

“It’s just a little sex,” She licks her lips. “Igniting passion in people makes more babies for you to teach heavenly values or whatever. God likes sex, Josh.” Her voice is sickening, it was like she was dripping in a delicious scent that Josh can’t get out of his head. Twisting his values and her intentions into something evil that somehow made wicked sense.

He’s been careful to only open up a small piece he knows he can close, but he almost loses his footing when he finally feels her stinging lips on his. She licks into his mouth and he’s about to protest before the images begin to flow through his mind.

‘Good thing your brother doesn’t have to transfer information like this, huh?’ Sal says within Josh’s mind.

Guiltily, he feels himself laughing. Though his physical body is still locking lips with her.

The room she brings him to in his mind is dark, a red lamp in the corner where two bodies are rolling around. Sighs of ecstasy filling his ears. The smell of sex hanging in his nose.

‘You’re really missing out, angel. Could show you the best thing life, and death, has to offer.’ Her voice is softer in his mind.

The scene changes. He’s staring up at her above him. Her hips are working over him steadily as her naked breasts bounce in front of him, her necklace is the glowing light now. Her voice is sinful as she moans praises for Josh. How good he feels, how big he is, how strong he is. The scene changes and he’s driving into her with her legs over his shoulders, she’s smiling sweetly up at him with her mouth open, repeating his name like a prayer. It shifts and she’s pressed face down in the grey silk pillows, her body spread out for him as he grunts and growls, thrusting ceremoniously into her as she screams for him to keep going. It’s melodic, every bodily sound and the scene of their physical bodies uniting is hypnotic. Like it was pre-ordained that he would fit so well inside her. He feels euphoric as it shifts once more. She is back on top, his hips press up into her as she grinds down. Their faces are pressed together as Josh holds her body close to him. Arms enveloping her fragile frame. The room is quiet as they are pressed skin to skin, her lips meeting his gently. Sharp gasps escape their trembling lips.

‘Okay, enough,’ Josh pushes away from the scene, feeling both aroused and confused.

In the speakeasy, she pulls back from the kiss with a wipe of her lips. She runs her hands through her hair as she watches Josh. She had shown him every one of his fantasies, placing herself at the center of them. They weren’t particularly raunchy, it was all about connection to him and for once she didn’t tease.

“I like you, Joshua,” She says, truthfully, allowing him to pull their bodies a little apart.

He was flustered and confused and embarrassed, but he also didn’t want to run. She had kept her word, shown him a few things and left. He didn’t fully understand the words she had just spoken.

He shakes his head, an awkward smile on his lips there on accident, and she stares at him wistfully.

“I haven’t had someone in my mind in a very long time.”

“It’s okay,” She soothes. “You really are an angel. Maybe on this earthly plane for too long since you clearly have carnal desires, but they were sweet. Every man’s mind I’ve looked into had vile and cruel desires…” She paused, looking past Josh. “Even in my first life, all the men I knew wanted to hurt the women they supposedly loved.”

Josh’s eyebrows shot up in shock.

“The closest you got to dirty was having me in do–”

“Okay!” Josh cut her off. “I think it’s time to call it a night.” He turned and walked swiftly through the crowd, parting easily for him–definitely not a misuse of his miracles.

“Fine,” She grinned wickedly and whistled for Rori, sauntering after Josh.

Back on the street, it could’ve been daytime with all the lights compared to the speakeasy. She squinted her eyes in distaste, thriving in the dark and wishing she had brought her sunglasses.

Josh was turned away from her so she tapped on his shoulder, wanting his attention. Wanting to see him again. He turned slowly and the look on his cherubic face was troubled. She frowned, about to ask what got his wings in a twist.

A shadow stepped into Josh’s light. His hair was long and messy, in need of a wash. His silver jewelry shined heavy on his tanned chest. His black button up was almost completely open exposing his torso and he held a wide-brimmed black hat loosely in one hand and a guitar case more carefully in the other. His eyes flashed yellow when he spotted Y/N.

She straightened her posture under his gaze and gave him a defiant look. Rori growled, but stayed behind her legs.

Jake ran his tongue over his bottom lip, taking in the woman shaped devil before him. “You must be the new demon in town.”

She tilted her head at him and looked between Josh and Jake. “And you must be your brother’s keeper.”

He took a menacing step closer, narrowing his eyes at his angel of a brother before returning his gaze to her. “Something like that. Now, farewell…or don’t, I don’t care.”

She opened her mouth to speak again but no sound came out.

His eyes flashed again as he turned on his heel and said tersely, a command, “Josh.”

The pair disappeared into fog that had appeared as suddenly as the older demon along the nighttime sidewalk and then she watched it dissipate moments later, leaving no trace of the creatures. The men. The angel and the demon.

to be continued... join the taglist

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builtbybrokenbells · 7 months ago

Text

Little Miss Sunshine | JTK

Amidst a night of high emotion, one single confession turns your whole world upside down, making you realize that you had a certain someone misunderstood all along.

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader

Word count: 26k (oops)

Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, fingering (f!receiving), oral (f&m receiving), (sort of) face fucking, cum play, rough sex, also sweet sex, katoptronophilia (mirror sex), mentions/phrases pertaining to free use kink, dom/sub, possessiveness, praise, degradation, name calling, impact play, biting, sir kink, mentions of masturbation (f&m), multiple orgasm (m&f), simultaneous orgasm, overstimulation, begging, lots of dirty talk, lots of making out, dry humping, angst, unrequited feelings, feelings of not being good enough/rejection, overthinking, emotional talks, asshole Jake, drunk confessions, arguing, awkward small talk/conversations, fighting, non-sexual name calling, fluff, drinking, smoking, swearing, crying, sorry if i miss any!

heard you guys wanted some grumpy x sunshine love (this is also kind of bordering enemies to lovers) 🤔 also, this picture is EXACTLY what I picture Jake as in this fic. I was gonna wait to post but I was too excited to work on some other stuff coming very soon 😉. I hope you guys enjoy! As always, be kind and don’t mind any grammar mistakes 🤍 (very lightly edited)

“And then I said to him, try that shit around here, and you’ll see how it works out for you.” The tall blonde man spoke, his tone grating and growing more annoying by the second. He had an irritating smile on his lips as he continued trying his best to impress you with another, mind-numbing story.

“Right,” you nodded, swirling your straw around your drink, trying to sound more interested than you actually were. As you tried to think of something to say, you sucked a sharp breath in through your teeth, letting your eyes dart around the room in search of a familiar face. “I’m sure he kept to himself after that.” You finally replied, trying to up the ante and lessen the impact of your monotone response.

“Yeah, I love messing with the new guys at work. Always keeps them on their toes.” He said, taking a sip of his beer as he looked over your face. As he lowered the bottle from his lips, he seemed to lean even closer than he already was, making you force yourself backwards.

You had no idea how you found yourself in the situation, stuck in conversation with a mediocre man about his mediocre job (which you still weren’t quite sure what it even was) and desperate to find a quick way out. You had come to the stupid party for one reason, and so far, you hadn’t seen him once, despite it being hosted at his own house. As you scanned the crowd for the millionth time, you found yourself growing more impatient than you already were. Your foot tapped against the ground as you checked your watch, wondering if you were already in too deep or if you could slide out the front door without being noticed.

Then, a wave of relief washed over you as you caught sight of a familiar head of brown hair. You threw back the last of your drink, placing the empty cup on the table as you scrambled to refill it with the premixed bottle you brought in your bag. You fumbled with the cap you’d screwed on too tight while listening to the man across from you ramble about an office staff party he’d attended last week, eventually prying it from the top of the juice jug after a moment's struggle. You tipped it forward, filling the solo cup and snatching it off the table after you shoved the jug back in your bag.

You had never seen your best friend's house so full; people were crowding the hallways, nearly standing on top of each other as they tried to force their way into the rooms overflowing with bodies. The music was astonishingly loud, and you definitely weren’t drunk enough to enjoy it yet. Worse than that, you barely recognized a single face in the crowd, and you were desperate to find someone you knew.

“Anyway, it was nice getting to know you, Johnny. I see Sam over there, so I better go say hi.” You forced a blinding smile, giving him a friendly pat on the shoulder as you tried to map out the best way around him.

“J-Johnny?” He asked, confusion written all over his face. “My name is Jimmy.” He corrected, his ego bruised at your lack of interest in him.

“Oh, shit.” You swallowed back an awkward laugh, biting down on the inside of your lip as you shuffled to the side. “Jimmy, Johnny… same thing, really. See you around?” You offered, knowing there was no way you would ever allow yourself to be alone with him again, unless you spent days sleepless and were desperate to find something that would lull your mind and force your eyes shut.

You didn’t wait for a response, instead pushing through the crowd as quickly as possible so you didn’t lose sight of your target. With your drink clenched tightly to your chest, you fought your way through the swarm of bodies that seemed keen on blocking the doorway. You extended your arm outward, your fingers brushing over the thin material of Sam’s long sleeved shirt as you grabbed onto his shoulder. His head whipped around, wondering who was touching him and why they were in such a panic to catch his attention. When his eyes landed on you, a blinding smile lit up his face.

“Hey, I was looking for you! Didn’t think you’d make it, Knockout.” He stopped in his tracks, completely changing course and turning towards you. He took a step in your direction, extending his arms outwards and engulfing you in a hug. You breathed a sigh of relief, letting the scent of his familiar cologne wrap you in an embrace warmer than the one his arms provided.

“I’m the guest of honor, ‘course I made it.” You rolled your eyes, pulling away from him slightly. “And I told you to stop calling me that.”

“You’re always the guest of honor at my house.” He grinned, letting his hand linger over your back as he looked over your face. You noticed right off the bat that he reeked of alcohol. His eyes were glazed over, soft and dark as his expression spoke loudly of all you needed to know. He was hammered, and you were very late to the party. “And I think knockout is fitting. A ten who will knock me on my ass if I say the wrong thing.”

“I’d like to be equated to more than a ‘ten’ with a bad temper.” You laughed, slouching down slightly as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

“I wouldn’t call it a bad temper… more or less a ‘fuck around and find out’ type of person.” He explained further, pulling you tightly into his side as he began to weave through the crowd.

“Yeah, I guess that fits.” You hummed an agreement, happy that you were safely by his side so you no longer had to wander aimlessly and get caught in conversation with people you didn’t know.

“It’s way more crowded than I thought it would be.” Sam noted, talking loud enough so you could hear him over the boom of voices and music.

“Yeah, I certainly wasn’t expecting this.” You laughed, honest about your feelings on the matter. When he invited you, he failed to mention that he invited the entire city of Nashville to the party alongside you.

“Yeah, guess I overestimated the size of the place.” He chuckled. “We’re hanging out downstairs, less crowded and a bit more comfortable.” He said, leading you around the corner to the stairwell. There were a few people standing in the way of the stairs, but they dispersed pretty quickly when they realized the two of you were trying to make your way through.

Sam was your best friend, and had been for years. You met not long after he moved to the city, when you were still in college and keen to the party lifestyle. Through mutual friends, you found yourself sitting in front of him at an album release party for a band that no longer existed, sharing your sentiments about the mediocre music and your love of tequila. From there, the two of you formed a fast friendship, finding you had more in common than a knack for drinking and appreciation for music. You weren’t expecting such a strong relationship to come from a drunken night orchestrated by friends who couldn’t have cared less about you, but you were incredibly grateful that you decided to go.

Since then, you and Sam did nearly everything together when he wasn’t gone on tour. Once you graduated, you found that you lost contact with most people from your university days, but it never seemed to bother you, because Sam was always around to do that, instead. When you were holed up in your house, working from your laptop and too busy to go anywhere, Sam sat beside you, commenting on anything and everything that came to mind. You guys frequented the bars around town, and got lunch when your schedules permitted. Oftentimes, you found yourself dozing off on his couch after a movie night with no intent of staying the night and waking up the next morning with a blanket over you and a pillow under your head.

He was the best friend you’d ever had, and you were thankful for his love every single day. You loved him so much that you couldn’t even refuse his invitations to parties where you knew nobody but him and his brothers, and most times you were glad you went, just so you had another memory to share with him. That night was no different; he was throwing a party just for the sake of it, inviting friends he’d made in the industry and drinking for the sake of being drunk. When he asked you to come, you gave a hesitant reply, knowing that you were bound to be awkwardly standing amongst a swarm of strangers. Within a few days, he’d convinced you it was alright, and eventually you gave in.

That afternoon, you spent an extra amount of time making yourself look nice. You went out the day before and got your hair touched up, and you even bought a new dress. You were feeling a little down, finding yourself in quite the romantic draught that worsened your loneliness as time went on. When you expressed such feelings to Sam, he seemed to make it a point to set you up with some of his company and promised that tonight would end the embarrassingly long bout of involuntary abstinence. Although you were nervous about his choice of company for you, you opened yourself up to the idea, knowing that you wouldn’t have much luck on your own.

It wasn’t that you were deliberately choosing to abstain from dating, but you were having a particularly hard time finding anyone who met your standards and more importantly, your needs. You were growing sick and tired of modern dating, and despised dating apps and all that came along with them. You weren’t in search of a hookup, and you weren’t looking for marriage tomorrow. You wanted someone who you could have fun with, to get to know without it being overwhelming and too much too fast. You wanted someone suitable for your mid-twenties; exciting, compatible, and loyal. Unfortunately, that seemed to be quite hard to come by.

You knew you had a lot to offer. You were kind, funny, and sometimes too nice for your own good. At the same time, you didn’t put up with any bullshit, which made it incredibly hard to open yourself up to someone. You could easily tell when someone only wanted sex, and people like Johnny (or Jimmy; whatever the hell his name was) made it abundantly clear. His lack of self-awareness and his commitment to getting closer to you despite there being no invitation to do so turned you off of him from the minute he began to speak.

On the other hand, because of your guard being up, oftentimes you read a little too much into the situation and ruined things before they could even begin. You were at an impasse, and such a large one that you enlisted Sam’s help to find you a suitor. You were an overly nice person who’d been burned too many times, and you were (as some would say) picky. You barely trusted his judgment, but you figured that you would at least try and open yourself up to his ideas, because you certainly weren’t getting anywhere by yourself.

“You know, I figured that tonight might be a good night for you and Jake to get to know each other.” Sam stated, nearing the bottom of the stairs.

“Jake?” You asked, confused as you followed behind him. You pulled down the skirt of your tight fitting dress, carefully stepping down on the cool wooden floor as you passed the bottom step. “Like, your brother who’s barely given me any inclination that he knows I exist?” You asked, bewildered that Sam would even suggest that. “And when he does, he looks like he’d rather be with anyone else rather than with me?”

“Oh, come on. That’s not true.” Sam chuckled, turning back to face you now that you were on solid ground. The basement was much less crowded than the upstairs, just like Sam had told you. It was nice, allowing you to actually sort out your thoughts before your head was pulled into another direction.

“It is so!” You laughed, taking his response with a grain of salt. You didn’t have complete certainty that Jake felt that way about you, but he definitely didn’t make it a point to try and be friendly. “I get along so well with Josh and Danny, and then there’s him. He never talks to me, and he basically ignores me when I speak first. When he does answer, it’s like, one or two words, and never any kind of emotion. I don’t think he likes me, and that’s fine, but I definitely don’t think we should ‘get to know each other’.”

“The other day you guys talked about the weather!” Sam argued his point, only making you roll your eyes.

“Yeah, the weather, Sam. You know, like the most basic of small talk that exists?”

“He seemed really passionate about the sun.” Sam shrugged, reaching out and placing a hand on your back. “Just give it a shot. You never know, right?”

“Sam, if that’s who you’re trying to set me up with, you’ve officially gone insane.” You muttered, letting him guide you towards the group of people huddled by his large arrangement instruments.

“Not insane, and I mean it, Y/N. I think you guys would really get along if you got past the weather. It’s not that you don’t like each other, you’ve just never tried that hard, and neither has he.”

“Yeah, because I’m pretty sure he hates me!” You whisper-shouted, nearing the chattering crowd.

“That’s a strong word,” Sam said, clearly trying to put an end to the argument. “Besides, I already asked him to talk to you tonight, so I guess there’s no real way out of it.” He shrugged, a sly smile forming on his lips as he began to walk away from you.

“Sam!” You exploded, reaching forward and grabbing his hand to hold him in place. “Why would you do that? Now he’s going to feel pressured into talking to me!”

“Listen, Y/N.” he sighed, his lips still holding a ghost of a smile. “Jake won’t feel pressured into talking to you. If he really doesn’t want to, he won’t. Jake does not hate you, and Jake knows you exist. He’s just not the most outgoing. Once he’s out of his shell, I promise you’ll understand what I mean.” You could tell that Sam was genuine in his response, much different to the lighthearted jokes that he spewed prior. You didn’t want to be the bad guy and tell him that you thought his brother was an asshole, so instead you shifted uncomfortably under his strong gaze and gave a single nod of your head.

If Sam wanted you to try so bad, you would, but only because Sam was your best friend.

In truth, it wasn’t like you never thought of Jake in that way. In fact, you thought about it more often than you cared to admit, but you would have been caught dead before confessing it aloud. Most of the fantasies of Jake were contained within your bedroom walls, in the late hours of the night and earliest hours of the morning, and it had little to do with conversing with him and certainly not anything romantic.

Jake was attractive, and that was undeniable; he drew attention from the crowd the minute he walked in the room, and eyes never strayed from him until the moment he walked out. His long hair and his beautiful brown eyes made for a deadly combination, and the slight rasp to his tone when he spoke low and slow sent a rush of emotion straight to the pit of your stomach. The pinkness of his lips, especially when they glistened after his tongue ran over the bottom one, was delicious, and you were all but ignorant to that. He did not talk often, not nearly as much as his company, but when he did, it was always worth listening to, whether it was a joke or something insightful.

Jake's physical appearance had little to do with your apprehensions. If anything, it made you more willing to try out what Sam was asking of you. Although he’d never been outright mean to you, Jake had solidified his impression in your mind over the years; curt, dry, and a little judgemental. His micro expressions that seemed to go unnoticed by everyone else spoke louder than words to you, and he never seemed like he wanted to interact with you at all. He sat on the opposite side of the room from you, avoided your group-pointed topics and questions, avoided being alone with you at all costs, and got out of every one on one conversation with you as fast as he could.

Oftentimes you felt like he was watching you, studying you so he could find something he didn’t like, so then he could be crude and unapologetic about it. His eyes always seemed to land on you as the nights dragged on, and the drunker he got, the more often he stared, but he never spoke. If he wasn’t so attractive, his actions may have been more off putting than curious to you, but even if you felt like he hated you, you definitely didn’t mind his attention being on you.

He was more gruff than Sam and Josh combined, and his resting expression was not the most inviting. He joked with his brothers, but not you directly. Although, whenever he said something to gain a laugh, his eyes always flickered to you, as if he was looking to see if you thought he was funny, too. He was a mystery, but not one you wanted to solve. Every interaction with him led you to believe he was not a fan of you, and every time you tried to analyze it, you only ever found yourself believing it ran even deeper than that.

Still, he was fucking hot, and you hated yourself for being so attracted to someone who couldn’t care less about you.

You followed behind Sam, your cheeks red as you bargained with your embarrassment over the situation. What did Sam actually say to Jake? Was it as innocent as he framed it, or did it go beyond the minimal information he gave you? You weren’t sure you wanted to know, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to speak to Jake at all. In your years of friendship with Sam and the hundreds of times you had been around him, he had never been nice, and you were fairly certain he wouldn’t start now.

You wanted to believe Sam’s explanation of Jake, that he was just a tough nut to crack and you had never been fully committed to knowing him, but it just didn’t seem to check out. You were sure by now, Jake would have shown some idea that he didn’t mind you, or at least that he didn’t hate you, but there was nothing.

Well, except for one small little thing, but it was so long ago that you were sure he’d long forgotten about it.

“Woah, sorry!” Jake exclaimed as the door swung itself open. He took a step back, recoiling from the scene as if he’d just walked in on something explicit and was trying to avoid the awkwardness.

“No, it’s okay.” You muttered, closing your eyes and taking in a deep breath. This interaction was the last thing you wanted to experience in such a state, and you could only look forward to his standoffish nature worsening your already solemn state.

You had changed from your party clothes, the nice new jeans and shirt your sister had bought you for your birthday, which was the whole reason Sam threw you the damn party in the first place. You were in shorts and a t-shirt that hung just above your knees, your face tired and tear-stained as you made a quick move to wipe the dampness from your cheeks. “S’all good, Jake. You can have the bathroom.” You spoke again, a little clearer. The rasp of sadness in your tone was impossible to ignore, and even in his drunken state, he seemed to pick up on it.

You hated your birthday, and you hated that Sam insisted on throwing you a party for it. You wanted to leave, to go home after seeing everyone having such a great time while you were so miserable, but you were too drunk to drive and you would have felt terrible for abandoning Sam when he’d worked so hard to plan this all for you. The gathering was small, filled with people you loved dearly, and drinks were plentiful. Sam went all out with food, decorations, and dessert. You’d never had such an extravagant cake in your life, and you owed him everything for caring about you so much. You were so ashamed of your misery that you felt the need to hide in the bathroom while you cried, just so you didn’t hurt his feelings.

You weren’t sad because of the party, or even because of your birthday in itself. You were upset about the fact that no matter how hard you tried to have fun, something always happened that seemed to ruin the whole day, and this time was no different.

“You okay, Y/N?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowing together as he tried to read the situation. You barely looked up at him, feeling another wave of tears well in your eyes. He smelled so distinctly of whiskey, and his normal tough exterior slackened into something you could almost relate to relaxed.

“Yeah, fine.” You nodded, taking a step towards the doorway and expecting him to recoil when you neared him.

“Clearly not, sweetheart.” The pet name struck you as odd, the confusion growing even worse as he stepped in front of you to stop your attempt at escaping. “You’re crying, up here all alone on your birthday. Talk to me.” You finally looked up to meet his face, noticing your body flood with an unfamiliar feeling. There was a type of care in his face that you had never seen from him before, and it made your entire body raise with goosebumps.

“I… I’m alright, I guess.” You said, trying to find a way around confessing your sorrows to him.

“Can I come in?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, sure.” You breathed, nodding and stepping backwards out of his way. Once he was inside the room, he closed the door quietly, leaning against it as he casted his gaze back in your direction. Now that you were locked in a room with him, the smell of alcohol became all the more apparent, and it seemed to be mixed with a sweet scent of an unfamiliar cologne.

“What’s going on?” He asked, standing stagnant by the door as if he was fearful of coming any closer.

“It’s a long story, but I guess it doesn’t really matter. It’s over now.” You shrugged, raising your hand to your face to wipe your face clean of the sadness.

“Is it that guy you were with last time you were here?” He asked, hitting the nail straight on the head without even trying.

“Uh, yeah.” You nodded, surprised he even cared to notice you had company the last time you were around him. Jake had never been overly concerned with your presence, and you barely expected him to care enough to ask if you were alright. “Got in a fight before I came. Said he didn’t have time to come to my ‘stupid birthday party’ with my ‘stupid friends’.” You air quoted the phrases he used, sickened that you even let yourself spend time with someone who thought so little about the people you loved so dearly. “But he wasn’t too busy to party without me, and certainly didn’t mind locking lips with some other girl at the bar.” You explained, remembering the painful picture one of his friends sent through to you. You appreciated the fact that someone was willing to tell you about it, but it didn’t seem to make it hurt any less.

His lips pressed together tightly, the corners turned down into a frown as he digested the information you threw his way. For a second, he seemed as though he wanted to speak, but not long after that he silenced himself before he could get the words out. He swallowed thickly, toying with the ring on his middle finger as he tried his best to think of a response. Eventually, he took a deep breath and spoke words you never expected to hear from him.

“You are far too special to be caught up on someone like that, Y/N.” His tone was strong, leaving no room for doubt that he meant it. “I know it hurts right now, but you have to know that.”

“Thank you, Jake.” You said, your indifference for him melting away momentarily.

“Is it alright if I hug you?” He asked, carefully scanning your face. “Seems like you need it.”

“O-oh,” you breathed, shocked at his question. “Yeah, s’pose I do.” You let out a nervous chuckle. At that, all hesitation left his body and he stepped towards you. Carefully, he pulled you into his arms, his hold firm and the warmth of his body soothing. You let your head rest on his shoulder, trying to ignore the strangeness of the moment and enjoy the comfort. With your face buried in his button-up shirt, you finally had the chance to breathe in the cologne you had only previously caught a faint hint of. It was deep, woodsy and ambery, and it was unfortunately one of the most pleasant things you’d ever experienced.

You could feel his heartbeat, fast and strong as he held you close to him. One hand rested on the back of your head, an extra touch of warmth within his already strange actions. You had never been so close to Jake before, and for some strange reason, you never wanted to let go of him. From the minute he touched you, things seemed okay again, like nothing in the whole world could hurt you so long as he was right beside you.

Just when you felt yourself slipping out of the state of sadness, he pulled away. You found yourself mourning the loss of his touch, sad for a whole new reason as his body parted from yours. He didn’t completely abandon you, though. He let one hand rest on your arm as he used his other to wipe your tears away from your cheeks. With a soft smile, he spoke again.

“Don’t waste your tears on him, sweetheart. When it starts to hurt a little less, you should thank him for it, ‘cause it means someone as great as you won’t be stuck with someone like him.” He paused, ensuring you understood him before he continued. “Now, put a smile on that pretty face and come back downstairs. It’s your day, your friends are down there, and we want you to have a good night. Don’t let him win.”

You thought that maybe after such a sweet moment shared between the two of you, the dynamic might change, that he would warm up to you and a friendship would blossom. Thinking back on your hopefulness, you wanted to laugh in your own face. If anything, after the bathroom escapade, he grew even more distant. He stopped looking at you as often, avoiding your eyes when you looked his way and refusing to even let a chuckle slip when you spewed a joke. His already curt responses grew even shorter, and even less friendly. All of the affection he shared with you disappeared, and he acted as if it never happened at all.

You were ridiculous for expecting change, but disappointed still when you understood that he probably didn’t remember the interaction between you. He was drunk, and so were you, and it didn’t mean anything.

Still, no matter how hard you tried to believe it, it still fucking sucked.

You did everything in your power to get that side of him to surface again, but it only seemed to worsen his withdrawl. The nicer you were to him, the more he pulled away. So, eventually you stopped completely. You stopped going out of your way to build a relationship with him, because it was abundantly clear he wasn’t interested in it.

Funny thing is, when you started pulling away, he began to try.

A few weeks after you stopped talking, he went out of his way to ask you how you were. He lingered in rooms after everyone left, trying to remain inconspicuous as he waited for you to speak to him. His eyes landed on you more often than not, watching you carefully as you spoke to everyone else, waiting to see if you would laugh at his jokes. It was as if he missed you talking to him, even if he was the reason you distanced yourself in the first place.

He was so confusing, and you knew it was best to stay out of it. Even if you did think he was ridiculously attractive, he clearly had no clue how to express himself or any emotion whatsoever. The only thing you regularly saw from him was undesirable personality traits, indifference and annoyance most often, and anger at other times. You knew it wasn’t good for you, that you should stay away because you couldn’t get involved with someone so cold, and you did the best you could. Still, you would be the first to volunteer to kiss that damned scowl off his face, and happy to let him take his anger out on you.

The fact that Sam ever thought the two of you would work was absolutely blasphemous, but if Sam wanted you to try, you would at least give it another shot. Even if it was half-assed, you could still say you gave it your all, and he’d probably believe you.

Sam took one of the two available seats on the couches, far away from you and next to Josh. You felt a stab of pain in your chest as you realized he did so for a specific reason. The only seat left in the room was next to Jake, and as you began to approach, you feared he might get up and walk away as soon as your ass touched the cushion. Keeping your body rigid, you stepped over Danny’s long legs, extended outwards as he leaned back in the couch. You carefully stood between the two, letting the strap of your bag fall from your shoulder and it landed in front of you on the floor. As you sat down, you tucked the bag neatly behind your legs and against the frame of the couch. You let out a small breath of relief, noticing Jake didn’t change his stature at all as you took a seat.

‘Step one: complete.’ You thought to yourself, sipping at your drink to calm your nerves.

How ridiculous it seemed to consider sitting next to Jake a victory. The irony only grew as you remembered that Sam thought the two of you would make a good couple.

Jake had an acoustic guitar sat in his lap, tentatively plucking at the strings as he sat on the very edge of the cushion. You couldn’t help but stare, finding his face devoid of any negative emotion almost alluring. He was so pretty when he focused, the way his hair hung in his face and his eyebrows furrowed together in concentration. You strained to hear the light sounds coming from the strings, trying your best to ignore the booming music upstairs in hopes to recognize the tune he was playing. You watched as the tips of his fingers danced over the fretboard, delicate and calculated in every move they made.

Then, the soft hum stopped and his finger stretched across the fretboard to stop any lingering resonance. Your eyes flickered from his hand to his face, seeing that he was already looking at you. Your cheeks burned red as you understood he noticed your staring, and you swallowed back an awkward laugh.

“Hey, Jake.” You forced the greeting through your teeth, flashing a smile in his direction in hopes that the sweetness would deter his usual grumpiness with you.

“Hi.” He responded, his eyes trailing down to the solo cup in your hand. His greeting was short, but you counted it as a victory. Some nights, he never bothered to reciprocate at all, shooting you a pained look instead. The two of you sat in silence for a moment, neither of you knowing what to do or what to say. It was uncomfortable, but you forced the negative thoughts from your head and tried your best to think of a conversation starter. When it was clear he would not be the one to initiate, you spoke again.

“What song was that?”

“Who’ll Stop The Rain.” He replied, his stony expression remaining strong as he looked in your direction.

“CCR,” you nodded, embarrassed you couldn’t pick out the tune from memory. “My dad was a big fan of John Fogerty. Used to put us to sleep with the recordings from Royal Albert Hall.”

“Yeah, pretty good stuff.” Jake nodded, slow and stiff as if he would rather be anywhere other than with you. You took in a long breath through your nose, hoping that you could ease the painful tension between the two of you, but knowing it wouldn’t never happen unless he was willing to try, too.

“Yeah, absolutely.” You nodded too, taking a long sip from your cup.

“What’s your favourite song from them?” He asked, the words almost sounding strained as he asked the question. You fought back an eye roll, thinking it was absolutely ridiculous that he was troubled just to speak to you.

“Green River.” You answered, trying to be more enthusiastic than he was. You were happy he asked the question at all, considering it was probably the first thing he’d ever asked in attempt to get to know you, but his reluctance still stung.

“I like that one, too.” He said, his tone gruff but more friendly than it had ever been (save for the off night in the bathroom), even if the classification was a stretch. Then, he turned his head back towards the guitar, cutting the conversation short. You couldn’t help but feel a dissatisfaction with his actions, wondering why he couldn’t even pretend to enjoy a conversation with you, but you didn’t let it linger for too long.

You let out a sigh, turning your head to the other side of you, seeing Daniel’s smiling face. It was refreshing, and it was a relief to see his expression did not fade as soon as he looked your way. His arm was slung over the back of the couch behind you, his ankles crossed and a beer bottle clutched tightly in his hand. You figured he was an easier target, and a much more enjoyable way to spend your time.

“Hello, Daniel.” You gave him a warm smile as you spoke.

“Was wondering when you’d get here, K.O.” He said, flashing you a toothy smile to match your own.

“What did I tell you guys about calling me that!” You scolded, your tone light and your eyes shining with joy to tell him you didn’t really care all that much.

“If the shoe fits.” He shrugged, chuckling as he took a sip from his bottle. “What have you been up to? Feel like I haven’t seen you in forever.”

“I was away for a little while for work, actually.” You said, knowing you couldn’t get too much into it.

“You were away? That’s never good to hear.” He said, a slight grimace on his face. He was right; in social work, time spent away from your office usually meant something bad.

“Yeah, but it wasn’t anything major. They have a shortage of people a few towns over, so I volunteered to fill in for a little while until they could hire someone. I handled a few cases, but it was mostly just to do some paperwork so they didn’t get overwhelmed. I got back a few days ago.”

“You’re a saint for doing a job like that, you know.” He said, his words genuine and prompting a smile on your lips.

“It’s not the easiest job, but I like it.” You explained. “Someone has to stick up for the kids, you know? If their own parents aren’t doing it… then someone has to.”

You could not see it, but Jake’s head was turned as he sat behind you, his ear facing you so he could hear the words you were saying.

“You must be pretty good at it, too. I remember when Sam and I stopped by your office, it was plastered with drawings and colouring pages. Do you keep everything they give to you?”

“Yeah, I do.” You looked down at your hands as a sheepish smile crossed your face. “They always get so excited when they see it up on the walls, so it makes it worth it. Besides, brightens up my day when I see it, too.” You explained, knowing that you had never really thought twice about it; everything any of your clients gifted you was important to you and deserved a spot up on your bulletin board.

Alongside from Sam, your work was the most important thing to you. It was a part of you, and the only reason you and Sam got along so well is because he understood that. Lots of plans were cancelled or rescheduled at the drop of a dime, but he never cared and never made you feel bad about it. Sometimes, you were up at four in the morning, running out the door to the hospital in the early stages of your friendship, but it never deterred him from spending time with you. When you moved to a private company, things grew a little more relaxed and you had a lot more scheduled appointments rather than emergency appointments, but Sam would have stuck around no matter your situation.

“I mean, today someone gave me a yo-yo.” You said, a grin lighting up your face. “I’ve always wanted an excuse to learn those stupid tricks everyone knew how to do in middle school, and now I can.”

“Oh, I can’t wait to see that.” Danny let out a laugh, his shoulders shaking and his eyes crinkled with joy just at the thought of it.

“So what about you? What have you been up to?” You asked, growing tired of talking about you and eager to hear what he’d been up to.

“The same old, really. I went home and visited my family for a few days, so that was nice.” He said, knocking back the last of his drink and grabbing another from the box by his feet.

“That is nice!” You exclaimed, a warm smile encasing your lips. “I know you don’t get to see them all that often, so it must have been really good to go home.”

“It was,” he agreed, nodding at the thought.

“How’s your sister doing? I know she was stressed out about the last semester of school the last time we talked.”

“Good! She passed with no problem, worried about nothing as per usual.” He responded, almost wowed by how much attention you paid to him when he spoke.

“And that girl you were talking to… Sarah?” You asked, nervous you might have gotten the name wrong. He gave a nod, reassuring you that you got it right. “How’s that going?”

“Good! She couldn’t make it tonight, but I think it’s headed somewhere. Hopefully, at least.” He shrugged, trying to make it seem like it was less important to him than it was.

“I’m sure it will. I’m happy for you.” You smiled. Just as he was about to respond, Sam shouted his name from across the table, pulling him in a completely different direction. You didn’t pay much mind to it, settling comfortably back in your seat as Sam resumed an earlier conversation with the boy beside you.

You settled back into your seat, finding yourself content without feeling the need to be caught in conversation. You sipped at your drink, noticing your cheeks begin to turn rosy as the tipsiness started to set in. Your skin was warm, your mind swimming with thoughts that pertained to nothing important. You tucked your foot underneath your knee, relaxing into the position as Sam gave you a reassuring smile across the table. You gave him a small wave in return, finding the mixed drink in your cup taste better the longer you worked at it.

Some time passed, but nothing too interesting ensued. No further words were shared between you and Jake, but you did occasionally find yourself talking across the table with Sam, and a few times you were leaned over close to Danny to hear him over the chattering crowd and loud music. Then, something incredibly familiar reached your ears, the sound soothing as it drifted from the guitar in Jake’s lap and over towards you. The twang was different, a little more calm as he played on the acoustic, but it was still just as good.

Green River.

You turned your head towards him, smiling as you watched his fingers pluck the strings. You bit your tongue, tempted to sing along but knowing it likely wouldn’t help the lingering tension between you and the boy. Your gaze flickered to his face, curious to see his expression as he played the song you very clearly expressed your enjoyment of. To your surprise, he was looking at you, and the usual scowl on his face had softened into an almost smile.

He wanted to know if you liked it, almost excited at the prospect of impressing you with the song.

Perhaps Sam was right, and you hadn’t tried hard enough to get to know him. You weren’t committed enough to getting through the tough exterior, because in that moment, you saw a tiny glimpse of the Jake you saw that night in the bathroom. His eyes were warm, glimmering with curiousity as he continued to strum the tune. Maybe he wasn’t so against knowing you, but rather needed some common ground so he could get his footing.

No matter the reasoning, you could go along with it, because without the cold undertones in his expression, he was a million times more attractive than he’d ever been before. The liquor in your cup was strong, definitely encouraging your thoughts about his pretty face, but as he played a song you remembered from the happiest days of your childhood, it struck something within you that he’d never touched before.

“Sing it.” Jake encouraged, his voice just loud enough for you to hear as he played the intro a second time through. You thought you misheard him, unable to believe he was really initiating such a fun moment that involved both of you, together. Even as you tried to discredit it, his eyes told you otherwise, imploring you to do as he asked.

“Well, take me back down where cool water flow,” you began, knowing your intoxication had everything to do with your courage. You worried that he would change his mind, or regret asking you to do so, but as you finished he played the little riff that followed, a genuine smile beginning to blossom on his lips.

“Let me remember things I love, Lord

Stoppin' at the log where catfish bite

Walkin' along the river road at night

Barefoot girls dancin' in the moonlight.” You sang the verse, growing more comfortable when Sam joined in along the way. By the time you finished the last line, Danny was leaned in close behind you, also belting the lyrics alongside you.

Then, the most shocking part of it all came about when Jake led you back into the second verse. He joined in, happily singing along with the three of you as if it were a completely normal thing for him to do.

“Fuck yeah, Jake!” You exclaimed, seeing his eyes brighten at your drunken cheer. For a single moment, things felt normal. They felt right, with you cheering him on and him trying not to laugh at your antics, like it was meant to be that way all along.

Maybe Sam was right, and the two of you could click well, even after all the time spent ignoring each other.

He led himself into a small guitar solo, seemingly trying to show off as he slammed the pick down on the strings. You clapped along, a blinding smile lighting up your face as you watched him do what he loved most. You couldn’t help but admire how stunning he looked, his pink lips slightly damp from his tongue running over them while he focused. The blush of his cheeks under the lowlight, and his dark lashes casting the tiniest of shadows under his eyes. He was beautiful, and you couldn’t seem to pull yourself away from him.

You were so immersed in his enigmatic nature that you failed to sing along with the group when the third verse rounded. Stunned and slightly nervous that someone had caught you amidst the impromptu staring contest, you cleared your throat and joined in with the singing, only slightly less enthusiastic. When the song finished, you were breathless and in a mess of jumbled thoughts, but it had nothing to do with the singing you were doing. Before Jake could say anything to you, you downed the last of your drink, reaching into your bag to refill the cup. You knew you would need the courage, especially now that the relationship between you seemed to hit a pivotal moment.

When you straightened back up in your seat, you sipped from the rim of the cup to lower your chances of spilling it all over yourself. Your eyes flickered to the man beside you, but to your dismay, he wasn’t looking at you at all. The smile faded from your lips as you quickly tried to cover up your growing disappointment, wondering if you were an idiot for thinking the two of you might be more comfortable speaking. You waited for a moment, just to see if he would initiate something, but you were met with nothing once again.

You were an idiot, and for more reason than just that. You were ridiculous for believing that he would be interested with you, in all of his blinding beauty and amidst the rockstar lifestyle. He had girls falling at his feet, prettier and with more to offer than you had. You were breaking your own heart by entertaining the feeble idea Sam planted in your mind, and you needed to realize the truth of the matter.

Still, a small fizzle of hope existed within your chest, and you thought you would give it one last shot.

“That was really good, Jake. Thank you for playing it for me.” You said, keeping your tone sweet and the look in your eyes warm despite the blossoming uncertainty in your stomach.

“What? I didn’t play it for you.” The words tumbled out of his mouth at the speed of light, defensive and with little thought put into them. As if he saw the breaking of your heart before his own eyes, he softened slightly, realizing that his words were too harsh, even for his normal brooding self. “I played it for myself, too. I love that song.” He added, hoping that it would lessen the blow. You could tell he only said it to feel like less of an asshole, and it only worsened your already bruised feelings.

You could feel an unfamiliar feeling rising in your chest, one that craved conflict. You thought that if you handed his rudeness back to him, he’d learn his lesson and realize how terrible he’d been to you over the years of knowing him. You wanted a fight, to figure out the real reason behind his dislike for your company, and you needed it now. If he hated you, you wanted him to come clean and say it. You were sick of trying to start a friendship with someone who only ever made you feel like shit about it.

Then, before the accusations could leave your lips, he spoke again, but you would have preferred him not to say anything at all.

“Heard it’s supposed to be really nice out, tomorrow.” He forced the weather forecast through his teeth, rubbing salt into an already lethal wound.

“Perfect,” your lips pulled together tightly, forcing some semblance of a smile as you nodded your head. “You know, we don’t have to talk about the weather every fucking time we speak, Jake.” He seemed to physically recoil from your nasty tone, seemingly never expecting something even slightly vicious to leave your tongue.

“Okay, what else would you like to talk about, Y/N?” He asked, a hint of condescension in his words. You rolled your eyes, long past furious with his blatant rejection of your presence.

“Maybe one of the fifteen other topics I’ve tried to talk about with you?” You offered the alternative like it never crossed his mind at all. “You know what? Nevermind. Doesn’t matter.” You shook your head, understanding you were preparing to fight a losing battle. When it came to anything negative, Jake was always going to come out on top.

“What, did Little Miss Sunshine finally hit her breaking point? Is this the first time you’ve ever been angry, sweetheart? ‘Cause it wouldn’t fuckin’ surprise me.”

“Fuck off, Jake.” You huffed, leaning forward and grabbing your bag from between your legs. “Like I said, fucking forget about it.”

Just as you did so, Danny leaned towards you in an instinctive reaction to someone playfully pushing him by the arm of the couch. His shoulder collided with your back, causing you to lurch towards Jake and at the same time, your full solo cup to slip from your fingers. As you tried to recover from the strong (and irritatingly painful) collision between your back and Danny’s shoulder, you barely noticed the liquid that had spilled from your hands onto the couch, and unluckily, Jake’s leg.

Before you could process all that happened in such a short time, you heard Danny’s profuse apologies from over your shoulder, but not well over the boom of Jake’s voice.

“Christ, Y/N!” He exclaimed, raising the guitar from his lap as he made a move to stand. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Watch what you’re fucking doing, next time!”

His words, equal to a million stabs in the chest, seemed to snap that little rational part of your brain you tried to desperately hold on to when in his company. Instead of an angry outburst, you felt tears well in your eyes, finally fed up with his irrationally irate attitude towards you. You tried to muster an ‘I’m sorry’, but every time the words began to make their way through your throat, your muscles constricted around them. Instead, you grabbed your things, in a hurry to get out of there and never come back. Before you were on your feet, tears spilled over on your cheeks, and your face felt like it was on fire. Your heart was thumping so fast and hard you could feel it in every part of your body, and your throat ached to cry out.

Why didn’t he like you?

What did you do to deserve such miserable treatment?

Why couldn’t he just pretend to tolerate you, instead of making it blatantly obvious to everyone how much he hated you?

You clutched your empty cup and your bag tightly to your chest as you stepped over Danny’s legs, your vision blurred with tears you refused to let Jake see as you rushed away from the group. By the time you made it to the stairs, you knew you would be alright, so long as you didn’t come face to face with him again. You clambered to the top of the stairwell, pushing through bodies in search of the front door. You were desperate for air, just for a breath of relief to help you forget about his venomous tone. When your fingers clasped around the doorknob, you instantly felt better. You pulled it open, stepping foot into the yard and away from the chaos.

The porch was near vacant aside from the couple engaging in a handsy makeout session a few feet away, but not even they seemed to notice you. You pulled the skirt of your dress down as you stepped forward, crouching down until your ass hit the wooden step. You released your hold on the short dress, stretching your legs out as you adjusted to a more comfortable position on the stair. You let your hand run through your hair, your fingers catching on knots as you combed through the mess of loose curls. You let out a shaky sigh, wiping the tears away from your cheeks as you let your eyes flutter closed.

You wouldn’t let him get the best of you, even though it was so easy for him to do it. You were better than his short fuse and lack of regard for your feelings, and you wouldn’t feed into the fire he created. As much as you wanted to yell, to call him out on his ridiculous behavior, it wasn’t you. You weren’t angry; you were bubbly, happy and outgoing, and you adored making new friends. You were a social worker who loved children because of their unusual glee despite being in horrible situations. You loved it so much, because that’s who you were. You loved being happy, the light shining in darkness even when you should be miserable and sad. You liked being that beacon of light for others, and you made it a point to remember small details so nobody ever felt forgotten.

You were kind hearted and free spirited, and you loved to love. You wouldn’t let him take that away from you, in all of his gruff grumpiness and dark brooding eyes. You were human, and everyone likes to be liked, but you didn’t care anymore. If he wanted to dislike you, that was fine, because you loved being you and you didn’t care to change for anyone. If he didn’t like your behavior, your desperation to see the best in everything and your constantly joyus nature, he was the one losing, not you. You wouldn’t bend your own boundaries to make someone like him happy.

The door creaking open behind you pulled you from your thoughts, making you peek over your shoulder to investigate the disturbance. You were met with a sight for sore eyes, the pure chaos of the moment putting a smile on your face despite your own internal struggles. Sam was stumbling towards you, his eyes heavy and glossy as he clutched a beer bottle tight in his hand. He was positively hammered, and you could tell with every step he took.

His stare landed on you, like he was a predator in search of prey. His hand holding the bottle raised, his index finger straightening and pointed in your direction. “Was looking for you, knockout. You’re fast.”

“You’re drunk, Sam.”

“Pshh,” he scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Tell me something I don’t know.” He took a few unsteady steps towards you, placing his hand against the railing to steady himself as he sat down beside you.

“I love you, you know.” You smiled, hugging your knees to your chest as you rested your chin atop of them.

“I love you, Y/N.” He slurred, the smell of alcohol radiating from him. In some strange way, drunken Sam had always secretly been your favorite, mostly because of his unapologetic nature when it came to the tellings of his heart. “You’re the best friend ever, you know. Like the best. Couldn’t imagine life without you.” He rambled, slinging his arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer to him. “You’re always so sweet and kind, and you make the best cookies, and you come to my stupid parties and talk to my stupid brother, even when you don’t want to. There’s nothing wrong with you, Princess. Don’t listen to him, ‘cause he’s stupid.” He reiterated the same sentiment, causing a small giggle to fall from your lips.

“F’course I show up to your parties, Sammy.” You whispered, leaning your head against his shoulder. He smelled familiar, giving you a sense of home you couldn’t find anywhere else. “Wouldn’t imagine life any other way.”

“And everyone loves you, Y/N. Josh, and Danny, and even Jake. ‘Specially Jake.” He hiccuped, smiling at the thought. The apples of his rosy cheeks were so soft in the moonlight, the sight heartwarming and forcing a smile onto your cheeks, too.

“No, I don’t think he does, Sammy boy, and that’s okay.” You whispered, gazing up at the stars and living in the sweetness of this moment rather than the bitterness of the one you shared with Jake.

“No, don’t think you get it, Princess.” He chuckled, his head toppling over onto yours as he heaved a large breath. He was caught in a nasty bout of hiccups, and his movements were all sloppy and loose. You were beginning to realize he was much more intoxicated than even you perceived him to be, and you were going to have to get him inside and to bed soon. “I can’t tell you, cause he wouldn’t like that, but he likes you, Y/N, wholeee hell of a lot.” He put the extra emphasis on the words to ensure you took him seriously. You laughed at his words, his oxymoronic statement, and the tone in which he said it.

“Sure, Sam.” You chuckled, pulling away from him slightly. You immediately missed the comfort of his touch, but you knew it was for the best. “Why don’t we get you upstairs, honey? Maybe a glass of water?”

“You think?” He asked, squinting at the porch light as he turned to look at you. His expression was challenging, but you both knew you’d win the fight.

“I know, Sam.” You gave him a soft smile. “Come with me?”

“Okay.” He huffed, nodding in agreement. “You’re staying tonight, right? Don’t want you… driving home…” there was a lull in his tone, and you noticed his eyes drooping lower the longer he spoke. “Jake’s an idiot, want you to stay, even if you’re mad at him… please?”

“Of course I’ll stay, love.” You promised, rising to your feet after ensuring you had a firm grip on his arm. “Come on, stand up for me.” You urged, pulling him only slightly from his sitting position.

“Kay,” he let out a shallow sigh, helping you only slightly as you pulled him to his feet. As soon as he was standing, he stumbled forward into you, and you wrapped your arms around him to keep him upright.

“Easy, honey.” You hummed, only slightly intimidated under his body weight.

‘You’ve got this. Get him upstairs and into bed. You can do it.’ You repeated to yourself, carefully moving your grip so you had one arm securely around his torso.

“Come on, Sammy. Help me out here.” You pleaded, taking a step towards the door. He seemed to be growing more tired by the second, and you worried that you would not be able to support his weight if he grew any more lax in your arms. He stumbled forward, uttering nonsense about his love for you as you desperately tried to get him to the door. You figured if you at least got him inside, someone would be around to help you out with the rest.

You felt your legs quivering under his and your own weight, but you managed a few more steps forward until you were just shy of reaching the doorknob. As you ushered him forward, you reached a shaky hand out for the door, only to find someone else already opening it for you. You looked upwards, relief flooding your features until your gaze landed on the body in the doorway.

“Let me help.” Jake grumbled, stepping forward to join the two of you.

“It’s fine, Jacob. I’ve got it.” You snapped, taking another step forward.

“Clearly not, sweetheart. Quit being so fucking stubborn.” He argued, taking post at Sam’s other side as he guided his arm over his shoulder.

“Jake!” Sam exclaimed, a lazy smile crossing his face as he recognized his brother's familiar face. “Y/N, this is my idiot brother Jake. Have you met before?” Sam looked in your direction, sending you a lazy smile and a sloppy wink. You stifled a giggle as you tightened your hold around him.

“Hey, brother. Let’s get you to bed.” He chuckled, anchoring his own arm around Sam’s back alongside yours.

Deciding it was for the best, you let Jake help you with the daunting task. Together, the journey was much less treacherous, and you had him upstairs in no time. In Sam’s bedroom, you and Jake eased your hold on him as he sat down in his bed, his eyes threatening closed as he slumped down onto the mattress.

“I’ve got it from here, thanks.” You snipped, brushing past Jake to grab a trash can, just in case Sam started to feel sick.

“He’s my brother, Y/N. I can take care of him.” He shot back, fixing the pillows so Sam could lay down.

“We’ll he’s my best friend, and I’m not fucking leaving him.” You huffed, helping Sam lay down on his side so he would not fall asleep on his back.

“Guess you’ll just have to deal with it, then, cause I’m staying too.” He rolled his eyes, plopping down on an armchair in the corner of the room.

“Great.” You muttered, fixing the blankets as Sam fought with the buttons on his shirt. “You okay, honey? I can help.” You offered, noticing his particularly annoyed expression as he couldn’t complete the task he’d set out to do. “Can you get him some water, Jacob?” You asked, a little more curt than you intended, but neglecting to feel remorseful about it.

“Why don’t you go, and I’ll get him out of his shirt?” Jake offered, malice fleeing him temporarily in hopes the arrangement might be more comfortable for you.

“Fine.” You sighed, stepping away from the bed and back into the hallway. A quick trip downstairs and one bottle of water later, you were back at Sam’s bedside, trying to get him to sip away at a hydrating alternative to the beer he was drinking all night.

You sat on the edge of the bed, watching as Sam relaxed against the mattress and melted into the pillows. Carefully, you reached out and brushed his hair from his face, gathering it in your hands as you slipped an elastic around it from your wrist. You couldn’t help but smile as he began to softly snore, a sure sign he was out for the night.

“Thank you, Y/N.” Jake said, his tone strong and startling you as you pulled your eyes away from Sam.

“For what?”

“For caring so much about him.” He shrugged, showing you a glimpse of himself as he professed his gratitude. “He’s my brother. Means a lot to me that you love him so much.”

“Don’t need to thank me for it.” You shrugged. “Hard not to. He’s the best friend I’ve ever had.” The two of you fell into a silence for a moment, the tension in the air thick and uncomfortable. You wondered if he would apologize, rectify the harsh words he’d thrown your way, or if maybe tonight would be the night he finally confessed how much he hated you. Or, maybe it was neither of those things, and the night would take the worst turn of all; the two of you sitting there, caring for a drunken Sam in awkward silence and sharing occasional words. Perhaps you could even talk about the weather.

“So when are you two gonna tie the knot?” Jake asked, his arms crossed over his chest as he watched you carefully.

“What?” You asked, looking over at him with confusion written all over.

“Everybody’s thinking it. We’re just waiting for you to get on with it.” He said, his gaze never leaving your face, almost as if he was challenging you.

“I don’t like Sam like that, Jake. He doesn’t feel that way about me, either.” You were firm with your response, ensuring he understood that.

“Right.” He whispered, muttering something under his breath you couldn’t quite catch. Your eyebrows furrowed, curious about his words but unsure if you even cared enough to ask. You turned back to Sam, running a gentle hand over his arm as he slept soundly. As you did so, you could feel Jake’s eyes burning into you, making you shift uncomfortably in your position. Eventually, it became too much to ignore, and your head turned towards him again.

“What is your problem?” You asked, stronger than you intended.

“Nothing,” he defended himself, his lips turned down into a frown. “Am I not allowed to look at you?”

“Why would you want to?” You rolled your eyes, looking away from his face. You found it much harder to stay angry with him when you couldn’t stop thinking about how attractive he was. He opted not to respond to the topic at hand, but instead moved back to a previous one.

“Why don’t you and Sam get together?”

“Jesus, what does it matter?” You asked, answering his questions with more. You weren’t keen on discussing your romantic relationships with a man who barely cared enough to notice your presence in a room, and you definitely weren’t willing to discuss your relationship with Sam with him.

“You wanted me to talk, so I’m talking!” He argued, keeping his voice hushed so he would not wake his brother.

“Yeah, I wanted you to talk three years ago, Jake.” You laughed, shaking your head as you did so, but the situation was not funny to you. You couldn’t believe him, and he continually managed to surprise you with his offputting comments and his vague remarks. “I wanted to know you, but you’ve made enough of an impression already, and that ship has sailed.”

“I’m talking now, Y/N.” He tried again, his voice softer but still seemed standoffish.

“I don’t want you to, Jake.” You clarified, realizing you’d rather sit in silence or talk about the sunny skies, now. “I don’t care. I used to get upset because all you wanted to talk about was the weather, but I get that it is the only thing we have in common.” You stood, knowing you needed to take a step away from the situation before you exploded.

He was so good at getting under your skin, so different and so irritating. He ignored every one of your attempts at getting to know him, and you were over it. He didn’t get to be an asshole for so long and then suddenly change his mind about it, like he got to call the shots. The ball was in your court, and you weren’t willing to give him the time of day anymore.

“Wait,” he pleaded, holding his hand out to stop you from walking out on him. Ignoring his plea, you pushed past him, stepping towards the door with no intent on stopping. “Y/N, please.” He stood, reaching out to grab your arm so you could not leave.

“What, Jake?” You snapped, turning on your heel to face him. “Unless you’re going to tell me what your issue is, I have no interest in talking to you about anything.” There was a fire in his eyes unfamiliar to you, so different than the pained, distant expression he often adorned when looking in your direction.

“My issue is you!” He said, never dropping his hold on your wrist. It wasn’t tight, far from painful, but it was exhilarating. His skin on yours felt fantastic, even if he was an asshole.

“See? Was it that hard to finally fucking say it?” You fumed. “Just say you hate me, Jake. It’ll be so much easier for both of us!”

“It is hard, because I don’t hate you!” He confessed, taking you by complete surprise. “I couldn’t hate you, ever. Trust me when I say, I’ve fucking tried!”

“You don’t?” You asked, your knitting together in confusion. “Then what is your issue with me?”

“I don’t have an issue with you, Y/N. It’s me. It’s my problem.”

“Tell me Jake, please. I’ve spent so long wondering what I did to make you not like me, and I need to know.” You pleaded, your anger dissipating as you realized you finally might get an answer to the one question that constantly plagued you.

“Can we… Can we go somewhere else? Please?” Jake sighed, looking over his shoulder at his sleeping brother.

“Yeah, okay.” You nodded, stepping backwards and out of the room. He stayed close to you, ensuring Sam was alright before he closed the door behind him.

You led him down the hallway, turning into the guest bedroom that had become your very own. You stepped inside first, staying near the door as he walked in behind you. He knocked the door shut as he passed it, the music still booming downstairs and the crowd still plentiful despite the night changing into the early morning hours. You turned to face the boy, finding him already looking at you. His gaze was uncomfortable, especially knowing that there was so much unsaid between the two of you.

“So, what is it, Jake?” You asked, your arms loosely crossed over your chest as you tried to hide yourself under his stare. Now that the two of you were alone, your skimpy dress felt all the smaller, and you were self conscious knowing his eyes were drinking in every detail.

“I’ll tell you, but I need you to answer me first. Is there anything going on between you and Sam?” He asked, his palms pressed together and his fingers extended outwards, pointing towards you as he spoke.

“No, Jake. Not that it’s your business, but Sam and I are just friends; it’s always been that way, and it always will be.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes.” You stressed the point. “Why does this have anything to do with you not liking me?”

“It has everything to do with it, because I do like you!” He exploded, the sudden shift taking you by surprise. You recoiled at the strength of his words, watching him in shock for a moment.

“What are you angry about?” You asked, unable to piece together his erratic behaviour. His head fell back on his shoulders, a groan leaving his lips as he struggled to speak. It seemed as if his thoughts were plaguing him and he wanted to do anything other than confess them.

“I do like you, sunshine, and a lot more than you think.” He explained, drawing in a long breath and stepping towards you. “I like you too much, and I am a fucking idiot for treating you so badly, but I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Talk to me, Jake. Tell me what’s wrong, and we can work it out, together.” You pleaded, a shred of sympathy for the man taking hold despite all of your anger.

“See? That’s why, because after three years of me being a dick, you’re still trying to be nice to me!” He exclaimed, appalled at your concern and constant attempts to help fix things. “You should be yelling, or calling me names, or walking away, but you’re not.” He stressed the fact, hoping you understood what he meant.

“Is that what you want me to do?” You asked, confused by his response.

“No, I don’t want—“ he cut himself off, realizing how harsh and condescending the words sounded. “I love you, Y/N, and that’s why I can’t fucking talk to you, because I know I shouldn’t!” You were stunned, taken back by his bold confession and unsure how to respond to it. Your eyes widened, your lips parted as you breathed in his bare honesty hanging in the air. “I’ve spent three years falling for you, and it fucking kills me, but I can’t get you out of my head. Your perfect smile, and that cute little laugh, and the fact you care about everyone and everything, no matter what. You take care of all of us, all of the time. You’re funny, you’re smart, and you are way out of my league.”

You were so shocked at his confession that you forgot to breathe for a moment, and the fact he thought you were out of his league was laughable. You were in such a state that you didn’t think your actions through before responding, and an actual laugh fell from your lips. As soon as the sound reached your ears, your hand instinctively raised and clamped over your mouth, horrified that you made the sound in the first place. A flash of hurt crossed his face, the small expression telling you he regretted speaking at all. The laugh cut deep, but he was misunderstanding the intent behind it.

“You know what? Never mind. Pretend I never said anything at all.” He muttered, stepping towards the door.

“No, Jake.” You stepped forward, this time to stop him from leaving. “I’m not laughing at you.” You promised, your cool hand landing on his noticeably warm biceps. The soft fabric of his shirt felt good on your fingers, and an unfamiliar feeling blossomed in the pit of your stomach. “It’s just… I spent so long thinking you hated me. It’s a lot to take in. You have to understand that.” His eyes flickered back to you, then down to your hand on his arm. There was no longer any malice in his face, the softness of his features all the more alluring now that his defences were down. “Just… work with me, please?”

“Okay.” He whispered, turning back towards you slowly.

“I just… I think that you believing I’m out of your league is funny, because it couldn’t be further from the truth.” You explained, your voice quiet. The two of you were closer than you’d ever been, the heat of his body radiating from him. The sweet, intoxicating smell of his cologne you remembered so fondly from the night in the bathroom hit you with full force, skewing every one of your morals the longer you breathed it in. The drunken, desperate part of you was almost willing to forgo any tough conversation and have your way with him then and there, but you managed to stave off the urge for a little longer. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Why would I, Y/N?” He asked, frustrated by the thought, but much more calm now that he understood your feelings a bit better. “Why would I try to pursue you, when we both know that I’m no good for you?”

“No good for me?” You asked, inching closer to him in hopes you wouldn’t have to give up the contact with him.

“Yeah,” he nearly scoffed the word. “No good for you. Think about it, sweetheart. You are a ray of sunshine, all of the time. You light up a room wherever you go, and everyone falls in love with you without even trying. You’re a social worker, for gods sake. You’re so good that you help people for a living, with no benefit to yourself. You remember the small details, you never make anyone feel left out or forgotten. You’re good, and I’m not. I treated you like shit for three years because I couldn’t let myself drag you down with me. I didn’t want to do that to you, but I had to.”

“What are you talking about, Jake? You wouldn’t be dragging me down at all.” You wished he would hear how ridiculous his words sounded, but he was stubborn, and you knew that for a fact.

“I’m miserable. I’m mean, and I’m snarky when I don’t even want to be. I’ve got a temper, and I say things I shouldn’t. You don’t deserve someone like that. You deserve someone who’s just as happy as you are, who puts out just as much good in the world. You’re waking up at three in the morning to go to the hospital and help out a family in need, and I’m just passing out drunk on someone’s couch. You help people, and I hurt people, even when I don’t want to. You don’t deserve that, Y/N, and I can’t do that to you. I bit my tongue because I wanted you to fall in love with someone who could make you happy.” He explained, his drunken ramblings tugging at your heartstrings.

“Jake,” you whispered, your hand tightening on his arm to pull his attention towards you. Now that he started, he couldn’t seem to stop himself from talking. All that he held back for so long was finally surfacing, and it didn’t seem to want to slow.

“I wanted you to fall in love with Sam, because you two are great for each other. It would have sucked, but I know that you deserve someone who can love you like that. I hate myself for pushing you so far away, but I had to, for you. I didn’t want you to get involved with me, because you are too bright and shiny, and I’m a little bit broken. I don’t know how to love, I’m not good at it, and you should be with someone who can give you the world.”

“Hey.” You said, firm as you dropped your hold on his arm. You reached up, taking his cheeks between your hands and forcing him to look at you. “You don’t get to decide that for me. You don’t get to choose who is good for me and who isn’t, Jacob.” You said, swallowing hard as his brown eyes seemed to be staring into your soul. “You’re not broken, and you’re not bad, Jake. I’ve seen it before, and I’m seeing it right now. You have a big heart, and you care so much, even if you aren’t the best at showing it.” You breathed, looking over his face. Your heart was beating fast, your chest a mess of emotions you’d never quite felt before in your life. You were angry, confused, but also incredibly happy to finally hear the truth coming from his lips. You were oddly attracted to him in the moment, and you finally felt like the two of you were on the same page.

“I don’t like Sam that way, because I’m not looking for someone bright and shiny. I’m looking for someone who makes me feel something, and you do, and you always have. Why do you think I’m still trying so hard? After this long, I still want to be around you, and I still want to talk to you. I like being bright and shiny, and I like helping people. That’s who I am, and I can’t change that, but there’s nothing wrong with you, Jake. You said you’re ‘bad’, but how could you be? You spent three years putting me before you, because you didn’t want to hurt me.” You explained, begging for him to see reason. “What you just said to me, about how you feel… Jake, nobody’s ever said anything like that before. Nobody’s ever cared like that before.”

“I do care, and I definitely don’t hate you. I had to push you away, because every time I see you, I want to tell you how badly I need you. I tried so hard to get over you, but I can’t get you out of my fucking head.” At that, his hands raised to your hips, drawing you closer to him as he spoke.

“I’m not asking you to, Jake.” You said, your head spinning from the feeling of his hands on you. It felt so good, so unlike anything you’d ever felt before. Your hands were still on his cheeks, his face unbearably close to your own. After hearing everything he had to say, it made sense. All of the staring, his avoidance of being alone with you, the sweet moment in the bathroom. “I like you, in all of your grumpiness. I think you’re funny, and smart, and you are incredibly talented. I like that you play songs for me on the guitar, even if you don’t want to admit it, and I love that you love me so selflessly. You don’t get to decide if you’re no good for me, and you don’t get to force me to fall in love with someone else, because right now, I’m quite interested in knowing what it’s like to love you.”

“You can’t just say stuff like that, sweetheart.” He warned, his tone gravelly as his heart began to beat solely for you, for the moment you were sharing.

“I’m not just saying it. I mean it. After all this time, I’m still here, listening to everything you have to say.”

“I did play that song for you. I wanted to see you smile.” He confessed, almost pained at how badly he needed to see the joy written over your face. “I wanted to hear you sing it. I wanted you to sit next to me. I want it all, Y/N, all of the god damn time. I want you, but I don’t know how to do it right.”

“We can work on that part, because I want you too, Jake. I can’t walk away from you after you said all of that, because I don’t think I’ll every find anyone else quite like you. I don’t care if you’re grumpy, and I don’t care if you have a hard time showing how you feel. You’re not broken, and you’re not bad for me.” You felt your lips upturn into a small smile, noticing the blush of his cheeks and all of the small details you never had the chance to admire.

There was a splatter of freckles across the bridge of his nose, like a constellation gracing his tanned skin. His brown eyes were even more breathtaking up close, and the fullness of his lips were more tempting than they’d ever been. You wanted to lean forward, to taste the sweetness he’d been withholding from you. The stony expression you’d grown so used to finally melted away, and you could see why he always adorned it while around you. Now that his cover was blown, the mask was gone, and he was looking at you with nothing but love in his eyes.

He was still hesitant, nervous about tainting the perfection you carried around with you. He didn’t want to dim your light, and he didn’t want to hurt you anymore.

“Stop pushing me away, Jacob. I don’t want to be anywhere else, or with anyone else.” You whispered. “I don’t want to walk away and forever wonder what it would feel like to love you. I can’t keep replaying ‘what if’s’ in my head for the rest of my life, and I don’t want that for you, either.”

“I’m not good at this stuff, sweetheart.”

“We’ll never know if we don’t try.” You offered, gravity pulling your face closer to his. Your nose was brushing his own, the smell of whiskey on his breath apparent and inviting. You weren’t sure what he was doing to you, but you’d never been so overcome with emotion in your entire life. “I don’t need someone bright and shiny, Jake. I need someone that balances me out. I need you.” His grip on your hips tightened, the breath catching in his throat at the three little words he’d been longing to hear since he first laid eyes on you.

“You mean it?” He asked, raising one eyebrow in inquiry as he ensured you were certain about everything you said. He didn’t want you to wake up tomorrow and regret it, realizing you drank too much and that he was too much.

“I mean it, Jake. I need you.” You stressed your point, desperate for him to close the gap between your mouths and finally give you the satisfaction of kissing him. Many nights you spent awake in bed, angry about his behavior and unbelievably turned on at how much you liked it. You hated yourself for being attracted to his behavior, but now that it made sense, you didn’t need to feel that way ever again. All the shame was gone, dissolving into one, unbearable, undying need for him.

The two of you clicked, better than anyone else ever had before. Even when you were arguing, short with each other and trying your best to stay away, there was always something. Whether it be a lingering stare, an accidental touch, or a sweet moment when you least expected it, he never failed to capture your attention and you couldn’t seem to pull yourself away. He was infuriating, but you always seemed to come back for more, unable to refute his beauty and unable to resist the urge to know him. You couldn’t stand the idea of him disliking you, because you so badly wanted him to feel the same way about you. You wanted him to be caught up on you, curious about you and desperate to know more. You wanted him to be drawn to you in the same way, and you couldn’t handle him pushing you aside because your interest in him was driving you crazy.

“Say it one more time?” He asked, his lips just barely brushing over your own as he spoke.

“Please, Jake. I need you to kiss me.” You repeated, stronger than the last. Before the last word fully left your mouth, his lips were on yours and he was pulling you into him by your hips.

With your body pressed against his own, you felt all of the tension between the two of you finally subside. His lips were locked with yours, finally getting the satisfaction he’d been craving for so long. Your hands held his face, the touch tender and telling of your enjoyment. The tips of your fingers were tangled in the strands of his hair, the soft chestnut locks twisted around your fingers in a way you only ever imagined they would be. The taste of him on your tongue was addicting, even more so as his tongue swiped over your bottom lip, begging you to let him take it further. You parted your lips for him, feeling his tongue quickly take advantage of the opportunity you had given him.

He tasted as sweet as you imagined he would, the warm remnants of whiskey he was drinking still lingering on him. He was addicting, intoxicating, and he was driving you insane without even trying. His hands on your hips were rough but gentle all the same, holding you tightly but cautious as if he thought he might break you. For the first time in your life, you were overtaken by greed, completely blind to anything other than your desire for him. The heat of his body as he held you to him, how perfect the two of you felt pressed together, was better than anything you’d ever felt in your entire life. His heart was beating hard against his chest, in time with yours as the two of you melted into one, cohesive mess for each other.

You let a moan slip out into his mouth, unable to hide your enjoyment for the moment. You felt his fingers tighten on you as he drank in the sound, surviving off of the sweet noise and locking it up in his heart for safe keeping. He pulled away from you, breathless with stars dancing in his eyes as he looked down at your face. His lips were swollen, the slight pout that so often made an appearance was nowhere to be found. He looked stunning, and you couldn’t believe he felt such a way about you.

“Hard for me to behave myself when you sound like that.” He huffed, his pupils growing large as he continued to study your expression.

“Who said you had to behave?” You asked, a sparkle of mischief shining in your eyes.

“Fuck, baby.” He groaned, your words hitting him harder than you thought they would.

He reached down, his hands landing on the back of your thighs as he lifted you in one swift motion. You locked your arms around his neck, your stomach twisting with excitement as you wrapped your legs around him. As he pressed his lips to yours again, he took a step forward. You were so immersed in the feeling of kissing him that you barely registered the chill that ran through you as he pressed your back up against the wall. With his newfound leverage, he pressed himself further into you, your hips meeting his as he kissed you. The intensity of the moment grew tenfold, especially with the new position.

The burning sensation in the pit of your stomach had prompted an ache between your legs that was becoming harder to ignore the longer he kissed you. Your dress had ridden up your thighs, resting just below your hips now. You quickly understood that you were not the only one with a growing problem, and you could feel his own desperation as your clothed cunt met with his cock through his pants. You could feel his entire length against you, and as much as you loved the feeling of kissing him, it made it incredibly hard to think about anything else.

His strong hands held your thighs, never letting you believe he’d drop you. He had you pinned against the wall, leaving no room for you to escape, and you were happy with it; there was nothing in the world that could stop you now, especially after feeling the euphoric affect of his touch. He was overwhelming entirely, but in the best possible way. You couldn’t even manage to form a coherent thought about anything other than the way he was making you feel, and you were eager to explore the possibilities the night held.

You tangled your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, allowing yourself to fully embrace how good he was making you feel with such a small amount of effort. His hands felt like they were burning into your skin, the touch melting into you, and his chest pressed against yours felt right. The scent of his cologne lingered in the air, filling your senses every time you had a chance to catch your breath. Both of your lips were slippery, slick with saliva as he continued to kiss you, making even more of a mess. His lax attitude made it all the better, showing you that he was completely comfortable no matter how far you wanted to take it.

Perhaps the most pressing thought of all was how perfectly his hips met yours, and how badly you needed to feel it with less clothing in the way.

“Jake,” you breathed, parting from him as you rested your forehead against his.

“Could listen to you say my name like that for the rest of my fucking life.” He muttered, his tone gravelly and his gruffness making a return. This time, instead of irritating you, it sent a wave of pleasure straight through you. In an instant, you understood that his strong personality extended far beyond the realm of casual conversation, and you were eager to see it in action in a whole new way.

“I want you, baby.” You said, the words falling from your lips in a whimper. The need for him completely overtook you, in a way you almost didn’t believe possible. An hour ago, you were furious with him, convinced that he hated you and wanted nothing to do with you. Now, you were digesting the fact that no touch had ever felt so good, and you would do anything to be under him, just for a night. “Please.”

“Tell me what you want, beautiful.” He said, looking over your face with a fire in his eye that you ignited. It felt good to be looked at in such a way, like the whole world turned just for you. “Tell me everything.” He ordered, willing to comply with every one of your wishes, but wanting you to give him every one of the details.

“I want it all, Jake. I want you.” You explained, feeling his hips push forward. The pressure of his cock against your aching clit gave you a hint of relief, but it wasn’t enough. “I want you to make me feel good. I want you to touch me.” You pleaded.

“What else, gorgeous?” He asked, his lips ghosting over your jaw. You let your head fall back against the wall, giving him access to any part of you he wanted. His lips placed kisses along your jawline as he awaited an answer, sloppy as he began and growing even more so as he continued down to your neck.

“I want you to fuck me, Jake.” You confessed, free of any shame over the fact. “I need you to fuck me.” You corrected yourself, your desire pulsing under your skin as his tongue traced over the artery in your neck. He could feel your heartbeat on the tip of his tongue, your very life source offered to him on a silver platter. He pressed his lips to the pulse point, drinking in the desperation in your tone as he suctioned his lips around the very spot. Your eyes fluttered closed as he applied the slightest bit of pressure, focusing his attention there for a moment until he pulled away.

His eyes raked over the sight, the skin pink and irritated from his lips and darkening by the second. A perfect circular mark to remind you of him with every beat of your heart.

“I guess even a perfect little thing like you has some secrets to hide.” He rasped, his pupils consuming his irises as lust worked to craze him. “Tell me how you want me, angel, and I’ll give it to you.” You watched him carefully, your cheeks flushed and your skin hot. Your nipples were hard, pressed against his chest as he spoke to you. Every time he moved, the friction sent another rush of arousal straight to your core. Your skin was tingling, your excitement reaching every nerve ending and sending goosebumps prickling over your skin. “Tell me how you want me to fuck you, sweetheart.” He spoke again, trying to pry the dirty confession from you.

You had thought about it many times, but one thing you never seemed to consider was that in every fantasy, you got off from the simple idea of him doing whatever he wanted to you. Now, after experiencing touch from his hands, you felt that way more than ever before. No matter what he did to you, you knew you were bound to enjoy it.

“That’s it, beautiful? You want me to fuck you however I want?”

“Yes,” you nodded, excited just at the prospect. You looked over his face, piecing together every bit of information you knew about him. He was blunt, honest, and he liked to be in control. You couldn’t imagine sex with him being any other way than that, and you were eager to please him. If it was something as simple as that, you had no issue giving him the chance. “I just want to make you feel good, baby.”

The words seemed to cause a short circuit in his brain as he processed them. His hands tightened on you, his cock pushing forward into your cunt even further and his breath caught in his throat. He studied you for a moment, quiet and concentrated as he tried his best to figure you out. After a moment, his lips upturned into a devious smirk.

“Have you thought about me like this before, sweetheart?” He hummed, smug as he asked you the invasive question. Your cheeks burned red, your heart beating faster than normal as you quickly tried to find a cover up for the truth. Then, you realized you didn’t really care at all. You had thought about him in that way, and you had no reason to be embarrassed about it at all.

“I have.” You gave a slight nod, confirming his suspicion.

“And you got off to that? The thought of being my little fuck toy?” He pressed further, his intent to get you to admit to the dirty little fantasy. Although you wouldn’t have worded it quite the same as he did, the sentiment was the same, and you did get off on that thought alone. “Don’t be shy now, baby.” He said, his fingers snaking up the skirt of your dress.

“I did,” you whispered, biting down on the inside of your lip as you waited for him to respond.

“And you’ve been keeping that to yourself all this time?” He asked, his nose brushing against your jaw as his lips ghosted over your neck again. You squirmed under his touch, the feeling of his hot breath on your skin driving you insane. The tips of his fingers found your hips, settling just below the elastic waistband of your underwear.

He was going to be the death of you, and you were certain of that.

“Let me get this straight, angel.” He contined, pressing a delicate kiss to the sensitive spot just below your ear. A breathy wine pushed past your lips, your entire body ablaze with desire and desperate for him to do something other than tease you. “Did you like it when I was mean to you?” His words were soft, carefully treading the topic as he continued to gently rock his hips against your own. The dry friction was enough to keep you sane, but nowhere near what you needed. He took your silence as enough of an answer, smiling against you as you contined to try and move your hips further down on him. “Never would have guessed that Little Miss Sunshine likes to be treated like a whore.”

“Oh, fuck.” You whimpered, your eyes squeezing shut as you tried to press your thighs together to get a bit of friction. So strung out on desire, you didn’t even realize that all it was doing was pulling him further in to you.

“I bet that pretty cunt is such a mess for me, isn’t it?” He asked, pulling you away from the wall and stepping towards the bed. His hands were on your ass, firmly holding you so you did not have to fear him dropping you.

His cockiness was infuriating in any other context, but in the moment it was sending you feral. You were a shell of who you were earlier that night, the only thing fuelling you was your lust for the man below you. You were desperate, willing to do anything to have him, and finally coming to terms with the fact that your secret fantasies about him had nothing on real life.

“Answer me.” He growled, his fingers tightening on you as he drew your attention back to his question.

“Fuck yes, Jake.” You rushed out, feeling guilty for leaving him hanging.

“You want me to take care of that ache between your legs? Make you feel all better?” He asked, his eyes flickering to your face.

“Yes, please.” You nodded, meeting his gaze with doe eyes that seemed to drive him crazy. With that, he dropped you down on the mattress, the impact lessened by the springs bouncing you back upwards.

“You want me to take care of you, we do this my way.” He said, now gazing down at you with a slight sneer on his face. “Sound good to you, angel?” You nodded, never daring to look away from him. “First off, you refer to me as sir.” He waited until you processed the information before speaking again. “You answer when spoken to.” He added.

“Yes, sir.” You nodded. A small smirk turned his lips at the sound of your response.

“And the last one,” he crouched down, eye level with you to ensure you understood the importance of his rule. “Don’t ever, under any circumstance, be afraid to tell me to stop.” At that, a smile turned your lips, and he reached up to cup your face. “Okay?”

“Okay.” You nodded, your eyes fluttering closed at the feeling of his thumb drifting over your cheek.

“As for me, I’m going to enjoy this no matter how it goes, so tonight’s an apology for how poorly I treated you.”

“It’s okay, Jake.” You assured him, feeling slightly sad that he felt the need to settle the score. “You don’t have to apologize for anything.”

“I want to, ‘cause you deserve so much more than that.”

“Okay.” You breathed, nodding against his gentle hold. His thumb drifted downwards, caressing the smooth skin on your face until it landed over your bottom lip. He traced the outline, taking a moment to admire you and appreciate all he had. As he did so, you placed a kiss to the pad of his thumb, feeling an unfamiliar tug in your heart that did not match the energy the rest of the night held.

For some reason, in that moment, things finally began to sink in for you, and you finally saw him for all he was. He wasn’t just some angry man who was unjust and cruel. He was a person, with feelings that plagued him every day, feelings for you. He chose to push you away not because it would do any good for him, but because he wanted what was best for you. From that alone, you could see that he cared for you far beyond what anyone else ever had. In some strange, twisted turn of events, you could physically feel the pull of emotion in your chest, the blossoming feelings for Jake and all he was, including his pessimistic and avoidant attitude.

This was what was meant for the two of you. Not the fighting, or the avoidance, but this; a blatant and unashamed attempt to show each other how you felt. The whole time, he only wanted to love you, and you only ever wanted him to like you. You had no idea why you wanted him to like you so bad until the sweet words began to fall from his lips, and now you understood that you had always wanted him to be the one to say such things to you.

He was a mystery that you promised yourself you wouldn’t solve, but that’s exactly what you’d been trying to do all along. You started every conversation with the intent of turning it deeper, and you left empty handed and heartbroken because you always felt like there should have been something more between you. If you didn’t truly believe so, you would have quit a long time ago.

Instead of dwelling on the past, you allowed yourself to live in the moment. The rough pad of his thumb still rested on the delicate skin of your lips, and you did the only logical thing that was running through your mind; you parted your lips ever so slightly, pulling the digit into your mouth and letting it rest on your tongue. You suctioned your cheeks around it ever so slightly, your eyes fluttering up to meet his as you did so. His expression was deadly, his eyes focused on you as his jaw clenched and the familiar muscle in his jaw flexed. Slowly, you moved your head back, his thumb sliding from your lips and falling from your mouth with a faint popping sound.

A low groan rattled his chest, his eyes fluttering closed as his head fell towards the ground. You watched him, eyes never leaving him so you could soak up every bit of his energy. “You trying to fucking kill me, sweetheart?” He asked, the rhetoric meant to go unanswered as his hands landed on your hips.

He pulled your near the edge of the bed, settling himself on his knees before you as his hand grabbed the fabric of your dress. He bunched the material in his fists, sliding it upwards with help from you as you lifted your ass from the mattress. When the bottom of the skirt landed near your navel, he dipped his fingers underneath the elastic of your underwear, using the opportunity to pull them down your thighs before you returned to your earlier position.

With your ass resting on the edge of the bed and your lower half bare, he couldn’t seem to control himself any longer. This was a moment he thought about often, but never truly believed he would experience.

“Do you know how often I thought about you like this?” He asked, his fingers roughly guiding your leg over his shoulder. The sudden action knocked the breath straight from your lungs, causing you to clench around nothing just from the thought of what he would do to you. “How many times I wanted to bring you up here and have you all to myself?”

“I thought about it too.” You breathed, your stare locked in on his face as his eyes scanned the sight before him. He leaned forward, his lips brushing over the soft skin of your inner thigh. Carefully, he sucked a trail of marks all the way up to the top of your thigh, determined to ensure you would remember the moment long after it passed. You reached down, brushing the long locks of brown hair away from his face so you could see the whole sight with nothing standing in the way. “I thought about it all of the fucking time.” You let out a shallow breath, watching as his mouth turned inwards towards your cunt.

Your stomach twisted into knots as you watched his tongue dart over his bottom lip, the anticipation killing you the longer he withheld his tongue from you. Without any further words, he leaned forward, unable to wait any longer and let his tongue connect with your core. Starting at your entrance, he let his tongue flatten against you, slowly moving it upwards through your folds until it landed on your clit. He took in a sharp breath before moving his tongue downwards and repeating the action for a second time. When his tongue settled over your clit again, he moved away just for a moment.

“You taste so fucking good, angel.” He rasped, his fingers tightening on your hips as he savored the taste of your arousal on his tongue. It was even better, knowing that he was the reason behind it. “Just as sweet as I thought you would be.”

A pathetic little whine fell from your lips, your face burning and your heart pounding in your chest as he lowered his mouth on you again. This time, his tongue went straight to your clit, his actions full of intent. As soon as his tongue began to trace over the sensitive bundle of nerves, your entire body began to tremble. You tangled your hands in his hair, a shaky breath leaving your lips as he focused his full attention there for a moment.

It has been too long since you had sex, and everything he did felt so good. You were a mess for him before he ever took your clothes off, and you knew it wouldn’t take long before he had you exactly where he wanted you. Your eyes fluttered closed, your head falling back on your shoulders as he worked at you, drinking up every drop of arousal you had to offer. His tongue felt so soft, warm and wet against you, making every movement all the more fantastic.

The power he held over you was nearly incomprehensible. Never in your life had another person affected you so badly and deeply, in everything that he did. Every lingering glance, slight smile and even the roll of his eyes, he had you hanging off it and asking for more. Even when you thought he despised you, you couldn’t shake the temptation to reach out and try again, because even a miserable interaction with Jake was better than nothing at all. You were a fool to think that the same emotions wouldn’t carry over into sex, but with his mouth on you, working you up to an orgasm, you realized that there was nobody in the world quite like him.

He was snide, sharp-tongued and quick witted. He was an enigma, catching attention no matter where he was or what he was doing. You were so convinced he hated you because it was easier to believe than anything else; even then, with his hands on your hips and his mouth on your cunt, you could hardly believe Jake Kiszka was interested in you at all. To know he spent so long hung up on you, thinking he wasn’t good enough for you was nearly painful to imagine. He was everything, even when he wasn’t saying anything at all. He was the whole world, and it felt like you were just living in it, which was why it was so hard to exist without any type of relationship with him. You wanted Jake to know you, to like you, to think of you in the same way you thought of him when you had a moment to yourself.

He let out a hum against you, the vibration running through your whole body and furthering the waves of pleasure already washing over you. You let out a sharp moan, your fingers tightening around the locks of his hair. You laid back on the bed, careful so not as to disturb him while he worked. The new position gave you a bit more control over the motion of your hips, and a lot more pleasure. He took advantage of your new position, pulling your ass off the bed and closer to him so he did not have to lean so far forward.

He groaned against you, completely overtaken with desire and unable to hide his enjoyment as your hips moved against his tongue to meet his time. The fire in the pit of your stomach was growing at a rapid rate, taking over your entire body and causing your mind to jumble with thoughts of nothingness. You needed it more than you ever needed anything in your entire life, and he was quite aware of that as you bucked your hips forward despite his tight hold. He was encouraging you further with every flick of his tongue, and just as you thought you couldn’t take any more, he reached between your legs and added his middle and index finger to you.

Your hips jerked upwards in reaction to the curl of his fingers, which hit against the sensitive spot inside you every time he pumped them into you. You could feel him smirking against you, cocky and rightfully so as he realized how good he was making you feel.

“Oh, fuck.” You whined, your eyes squeezed shut as a particularly intense wave of euphoria took hold. Your abdomen was tense, just the same as your limbs. You felt like if you moved an inch, you would lose the pleasure he was so kindly granting you. “Jake, m’gonna cum.” You warned, feeling the sensation in the pit of your stomach grow stronger, snowballing as it spread across your skin.

He continued to pump his fingers in time with the movements, pushing you closer to the edge by the second. You pulled your leg casted over his shoulders inwards towards you, drawing him in further as he worked at you with intent. You could feel a sheen layer of sweat forming on your skin, glistening under the moonlight through the window to illuminate the sin you were engaging in. The obscenity of the display the two of you found yourselves in was a picture that would be framed in your minds forever, the memory of the event seeping into the walls and remaining there forevermore. You wouldn’t be able to rid the memory from your brain even if you wanted to, and that was okay by you, because Jake was the best that you had ever had.

With one last curl of his fingers, he sent you over the edge, the knot in your belly tightening and snapping under the pressure. Your walls squeezed around his fingers, pulling him in further as his tongue traced over your clit. You cried out for him, pleading for more and less all at the same time, pleading for mercy you knew he would not give. Your hands in his hair were pushing him away and pulling him closer all the same, and you had never felt so strung out on pleasure in your entire life.

“Oh, god.” You whined, your thighs squeezing around his head as he confined to work you through the climax. His hands on your hips, bruising the delicate skin made your heart beat only for him in that moment, living just from the generosity he was granting you and thankful to be his.

When your body relaxed against the bed, he slowed his movements, eventually pulling away from you. Although you were grateful that he didn’t push you to the point of overstimulation, you immediately missed the feeling of his tongue, grieving the loss as if it were something catastrophic.

To you, it was.

He slowly rose to his feet, his hand swiping your arousal from his chin before they dropped to his shirt, quickly unbuttoning it and throwing it to the floor. You looked up at him, in awe of his blinding beauty and unable to process anything further than that. He unbuckled his belt, pulling it from the loops in one swift motion and tossing it to the floor.

“Get up.” He ordered, his usual expression taking over his face again, but this time it seemed even more ethereal. You did as he asked, rising from the bed and to your feet. “M’sorry, angel. Been waiting so fucking long. I need to feel you.” He said, kicking his pants and his boxers to the side to join the rest of his clothes on the floor. He stepped towards you, your eyes trained on his body as you tried to sear the sight into memory forever. He was stunning, more than you ever thought he could be, and seeing all of him only made you realize how lucky you were.

His hands snaked under your dress, pulling the tight material over your head and tossing it to the floor. Now that you were fully naked, he took full advantage of the fact and let his hands wander over you as he pulled you in for a kiss. You could taste yourself on his tongue, the feeling sending you feral as the pad of his thumb brushed over your nipple. You wanted to tell him he didn’t need to apologize for anything, that you needed him inside of you just as bad as he did. As your hands roamed his bare torso, you understood you didn’t have to say a word because he could feel how badly you wanted him.

He guided you to the edge of the mattress, taking a seat in front of the vanity Sam had placed at the end of the bed. He sat first, keeping his hands on your hips as he guided you towards him. With a smile, you placed your knees on either side of him, keeping a hand on the back of his neck to steady yourself.

“God, you’re so fucking beautiful. Wish you could see yourself like this.” He muttered, his head craned upwards to meet your gaze as he lined himself with your entrance. The feeling of him against you was fantastic, only growing more so as he ran his tip your arousal. He bright his cock forward, guiding himself so he could slide over your clit. Your hips moved downwards in reaction to the feeling, in search of more. The pressure of him resting against you increased, only worsening your growing need for him. “Come here, gorgeous.” He muttered, carefully guiding your hips backwards. You felt him slide through your folds again, the sensation something so different than anything you’d felt before. When he settled by your entrance again, he couldn’t wait any longer to pull you down on him.

You both let out an audible sigh of relief as he pushed inside of you, the feeling of him filling you so fantastic that you needed to take a moment to appreciate it. You weren’t used to his size, but the stretch of your walls as he pulled your hips down to meet his was fantastic.

“So fucking tight,” he muttered, his nose brushing yours as your forehead rested against his own. “Feel even better than I imagined.” He confessed, his hands trailing up your torso and tickling your skin. You began to move your hips, starting with a slow pace while you both grew comfortable with each other.

You weren’t sure why, but the thought of him imagining the two of you in such a way was enough to get you off all by itself. It affected you so much, you couldn’t help but bring it up with him.

“Yeah?” You hummed, maintaining a slow roll of your hips against him. The ends of your hair tickled the skin of your back, tangling with his fingers as he held your chest to his. “You thought about me like this? Just like this?” You continued, adding a little extra force to your hips as you came down on him.

“All of the time, Y/N.” He said, one hand reaching around you and landing on your ass. His fingers tightened against you, his palm settling directly on the curve of your ass. “Thought about how good that pretty little cunt would feel wrapped around me every fucking night.” He confessed, leaning forward and capturing you in a kiss. He pulled your bottom lip between his teeth, biting down with just enough force to cause your hips to stutter while they moved against him. “Takes everything in me not to take you upstairs and fuck you every time I see you.”

“I thought about you too.” You whined, your eyes fluttering closed as you focused on the feeling of him inside of you. You were without shame anymore, knowing that the two of you were finally on the same page. He thought about you just as much as you thought about him, he wanted it just as bad as you did, and you felt no need to hide it from him.

“Yeah?” He asked, thrilled at the sound of your words despite already knowing as much. His hand on your ass was guiding you down further every time you moved your hips, adding just a little more pressure to the already overwhelming sensation. “Did you play with yourself while you thought of me, angel?” He asked, his lips hovering over your ear as he spoke. The low tone sent a shiver down your spine, and his warm breath on your skin sent goosebumps rising across your entire body. Your hand on his shoulder tightened, but you did not confirm or deny the fact. “Come on, don’t be shy.” He coerced you to answer, leaning forward and gently pulling your earlobe between his teeth. “Want to know all of your dirty little secrets, beautiful.”

“I-I did,” you stuttered, clenching around him ever so slightly. He was impossible to resist and denying him the truth seemed more painful than confessing.

“So I was the one keeping you up at night?” He asked, a little breathless as he spoke as if the idea sent him spiraling. “My name on your lips as you imagined it was me touching you instead? And I wasn’t even there to hear how fucking desperate you were.” He said the second part with a hint of disappointment, as if he was grieving the loss without ever knowing he missed out. “You’re breaking my heart, angel.” He muttered, pushing your hair away from your neck as he pressed a kiss atop the darkening marks he’d already left behind.

“M’sorry, sir.” You pleaded, unsure why you were apologizing but doing so because you were terrified he might stop. He was silent for a moment, his tongue grazing your skin. The saltiness on the tip of his tongue seemed to drive him mad, his stature rigid and his chest heaving with every breath.

“Turn around for me, sweetheart.” He said, ignoring your apologies as his eyes focused on the mirror in front of him. He felt selfish being the only one who could appreciate the view of the scene you found yourselves in.

You slowed your movements, pulling away from him as you complied with his request without hesitation. Slowly, you got to your feet, turning around so you were facing the large vanity mirror as well. He reached out, his hands landing on your hips as he guided you back towards him. You placed your legs on either side of him, feeling him reach between your bodies to line himself back up with you. Once he knew you were comfortable, he pulled your upper half towards him, your back pressed against his chest as he slowly lowered your hips onto him.

“Want you to see how pretty you look when I fill you.” He muttered, pulling you down until he filled up you completely. A shaky breath left your lips as the tip of his cock brushed against your g-spot, the sight almost too much for you to handle. He reached up, brushing your hair from your shoulders and pulling it all to one side. He draped it over one side of you, his chin nestling on the opposite shoulder as you began to move against him again.

With the new position, you could see everything. The furrow of his brow as he bargained with the pleasure of feeling you, his clenched jaw as he tried to keep himself calm, and more importantly, you could see him fucking into you, every time your hips raised and sank back down on him. It was almost too much to take, the sight so obscene yet so beautiful all at once. His hand snaked between your legs, his middle finger resting over your clit as he began to trace slow circles around it. Your legs trembled as you tried to keep a steady pace, the burning in your belly reaching a new level as you watched his lust-crazed eyes, never daring to look away from you.

“This is what you fantasized about, sweetheart?” He asked, making you understand the real reason he switched the position. He wanted you to remember, to know exactly what it looked like as he fucked you, so you had something to think about the next time your mind wandered when you were alone.

“Yes, sir.” You whimpered, your entire body ablaze with emotion. You’d never felt so good, and you’d never felt so alive. Sex with Jake was phenomenal, something so filthy that it only existed in the darkest depths of your mind, even when he wasn’t doing much at all. The closeness was enough to drive you insane, and the pleasure was enough to put you in the grave. His stern demeanor was infuriating outside of the bedroom, but seemed to further his charm as soon as his clothes were off.

“Want you to think about it every time you play with that pretty pussy.” He growled, his hips raising off the bed to meet yours in a moment of high emotion. You let out a muffled yelp, biting down on your lip to silence the sound as it passed through you. “If that’s still not enough, you just let me know. I’ll be happy to take care of her, whenever you need me.” He assured you, his teeth sinking into the skin of your shoulder. The miniscule pain from the action only furthered the knot tightening in your belly. You needed to let go, to show him how good he was making you feel. You needed it more than anything you’d ever needed in your life. The pressure of his jaw slackened, and you felt his tongue gently trace the skin his teeth had marked, soothing the slight irritation he left behind.

A moan fell from your lips, loud and telling of the surplus of pleasure coursing through your body. His finger continued to trace your clit, relentless and unapologetic as he tried to pry another orgasm from you. It was becoming harder to focus, the sensation quickly turning into the only thing you could think about. You watched his face in the mirror, studying the beauty of the man below you. He was concentrated, certain of what he wanted and unwilling to stop until he got it. As you contined to watch him, you understood that his eyes were no longer trained to your face, and instead his gaze had fallen downward, settled on the exact spot where the two of you met. Your stomach burned as you realized he was watching himself fuck into you, the simple idea pushing you just a little closer to the edge.

“You going to cum for me again, angel?” He asked, his tone sickly sweet as if you had a choice in the matter. He wasn’t going to stop until you did, and the question only served as a catalyst in his ever growing ego problem.

Perhaps you were the real catalyst in the equation, because you seemed to lack any self control when it came to him, and you wouldn’t dare deny him of a single wish.

“Yes, sir.” You groaned, your eyes closing and your head falling towards the floor. You felt like you had no control over your body, your movements only made to further the pleasure he was already giving you. It was necessity rather than want; you were tired, but you couldn’t fathom stopping. You wanted to exist in the moment for the rest of your life, never letting him go and never worrying about anything else.

“Look at me.” He growled, his hand raising to your face. He clamped your cheeks between his fingers, forcing your head back upwards to face the mirror. Your body was overtaken with euphoria by the harshness of his actions, the feeling of his hand tightly holding your face adding the extra little bit of pleasure needed to send you over the edge. “Watch how good you look when you cum for me.”

“Oh, fuck.” You whimpered, your movements stuttering as the sensation became too much to withstand.

“That’s it,” he rasped, continuing to hold your head in place. “That’s my fucking girl.” The possessive claim sent you spiraling, the term too much to bear in combination with everything else he was doing to you.

Your walls squeezed around him, pulling him in further and locking him there as your second orgasm washed over you. He raised his hips off the bed, continuing the same pace as your body froze in place. His finger on your clit never faltered, ensuring that you got the most out of the orgasm. He continued to whisper the sweet nothings in your ear, praising you for the show you were putting on as profanities fell from your lips. Your cheeks were red, your face hot as the sensation infiltrated every nerve in your body. Your eyes remained locked on the two of you, soaking in every detail as he worked you through the climax, admiring him as he remained so tentative as you unravelled around him.

Before the pleasure fully subsided, you could feel him shift underneath you. His finger moved from your clit, instead his hand holding your hips as he began to stand. He held you as he stood, guiding you upright with him without ever pulling out of you. Your mind was foggy and your limbs weak as you barely worked to help him, but he didn’t care about the lack of support. He was crazed enough from the look on your face that something superhuman took hold. He pushed you forward, closer to the vanity as his eyes stayed locked on your face.

You raised your hands to the cabinet, knowing his course of action before he ever began. You began to regain your wits at the same time as he pushed your upper half down towards the wooden surface. Your chest landed on the frigid surface, sending a shock through your body as you felt it. He reached upwards, his hand gathering your hair and knotting it around his fist as he began to move his hips. The new position allowed for much more freedom, and much more control. As much as he enjoyed the slowness as you grew familiar with the feeling of him inside you, he could only give up control for so long before he went insane.

“Being so good for me, sweetheart. Just a little bit longer, okay?” He pleaded, his hips slamming forward. A guttural moan tore through your chest, the pain and pleasure mixing together to create a whole new kind of feeling for you. You were tired, nearly fucked out and ready to go to sleep, but if he wanted it, so did you. You would do anything to please him and you would enjoy it while you did so.

“Y-yes, sir.” You complied, your eyes squeezing shut as you tried to fight of the irritating overstimulation trying so hard to take hold. “Whatever you want, sir.” You added, finding that talking was helping you come back to your senses a little more.

“Fuck, baby.” He hissed, his hand coming down on your ass with a force that sent your knees weak. The ring on his middle finger sent an aching pain across the flesh, but it was so addicting you barely thought twice about it. The stinging sensation spread across your skin, the redness already beginning to darken where his palm came in contact with you. “Take it so fucking good.” He praised, his dark eyes still watching your expression in the mirror. Your eyes fluttered open to meet his gaze, the desperation to please him evident and doing nothing but furthering the frenzy he was stuck in.

“F-feels so fucking g-good.” You gasped, stuttering the words out through a mess of moans. You raised your hips a little higher, sinking your upper half down so he could reach a whole new angle inside of you.

“Such a little whore.” He commented, tugging at your hair and forcing your head upwards. Your eyes raked over your reflection in the mirror, barely recognizing yourself so strung out on pleasure. “Do you like being a whore for me, angel?”

“I love it.” You confessed, your heavy-lidded stare burning into him. “Only for you, sir.” You added, ensuring he knew that now, he was the only one who would ever have access to that side of you.

“That’s right.” He affirmed your statement, his words gruff as his movements grew sloppy. He was being pulled in to the same euphoria you’d experienced at his hands only moments before, the sensation taking hold and growing impatient with him. He needed it, and after his generosity, you would do anything to get him there. “This is all for me now, sweetheart. Nobody else gets to see you like this.” A high pitched whine echoed through the room, confirming his feelings on the matter without any words needing to be spoken at all. You wanted to be his; you didn’t want anyone else to have you like that, ever again. He brought out a side of you that you barely knew to exist, and the thought of letting it go was grievous. “Do you understand me?” He growled, knowing you did but eager to hear it anyway.

“Yes, sir.” You panted, watching as wrinkles formed between his brows, showing you just how hard he was trying to hold back.

“Want to hear the words, baby.” He pressed further, his pace bruising and making it difficult to formulate the statement he wanted you to say. Another moan tore through you, your throat raw as it passed through. You were on the brink of another orgasm, so close but it seemed just out of reach.

“I’m all yours, sir.” You promised, pushing your hips back towards him to meet the time of his thrusts. As his cock slammed into your cervix, your knees went weak below you, threatening to collapse under your weight. He noticed the change in your posture, immediately slipping his arm under your hips to hold you upright.

No matter the circumstance, he wanted you to know that you would never have to worry about falling so long as he was there to catch you.

“Fuck, you feel good.” He let out a strained sigh, his face contorting into an expression of pleasure. He was close, but he wasn’t willing to give in until he gave you one last orgasm.

To you, the thought alone was ridiculous; after everything he’d already done for you, you couldn’t imagine him holding back any longer.

“S’okay, baby.” You breathed, catching his eye so he could see the sincerity in your face. “Want you to cum for me.” You said, your words hitting him like a brick. It seemed to cause a short circuit in his brain, the role switch sending him spiralling in an instant.

You could feel him pull out of you, both of you knowing he couldn’t push himself any further. Something seemed to take over you as he did so, unfamiliar but not unwelcome. You spun around, facing him and quickly dropping to your knees before him. You were nearly saddened at the thought of such an anticlimactic end for him, and the feeling forced you to take action as you moved your head forward and took him into your mouth. You could taste yourself on him as you bobbed your head down to take his full length, the simple fact causing the ache between your legs to worsen beyond anything it had already been that night. You missed the feeling of him inside you, but you were more eager to please him than you were to satisfy yourself.

He looked down at your face, shock written across his features as he processed your sudden change. It didn’t take long for the surprise to be forgotten, especially as his tip hit the back of your throat. His hand reached down, holding your hair in his hand so he did not have to miss a single detail of your face. The warm wetness of your mouth was just as inviting as your cunt, and the sensation furthered his pleasure as if he’d never pulled out of you at all. He didn’t want to push you, afraid that you might not be able to handle the same intensity in the newest position, but when you pushed your head further down on him and his cock slid down your throat, he quickly understood that you were willing to take whatever he wanted to give you.

His hips bucked forward in response to the feeling, and you forced yourself to swallow, your throat constricting around him and effortlessly sending him over the edge. At the same time, the most beautiful sound fell from his lips, gracing your ears and settling deep in the pit of your stomach.

For a moment, you felt like you could get off on the sound of his pleasure alone.

His posture slipped slightly as his orgasm washed over him, his release spilling down your throat as he held you to him. You moved your head against the force of his hand, your tongue moving against the underside of his cock as you swallowed back every last drop of him. A strangled cry left his lips as he pulled back, his hips jutting forward again as you ran your tongue over his tip. The saltiness lingered on your lips, making your mouth water and leaving you wanting more. In that moment, there wasn’t a single thing you wouldn’t do for the man standing before you.

“Get up.” He spat, his shoulders still heaving with his breaths. Your eyes flickered upwards, catching his gaze as you withdrew your head. His tip fell from your lips with a slight popping sound, and you couldn’t bite back the smirk forming on your lips. “You think you can do something like that and finish it there?” He growled, watching as you rose to your feet. He was not angry, and not a single part of his face gave you that impression. He was enamoured with you, unable to walk away without at least thanking you for the service, and he was completely beside himself with desire. “Turn around. I’m not fucking done with you, yet.”

You did as he asked, spinning back around to face the mirror. You sunk back to the position you were in moments before, your hands clamped around the edge of the wooden dresser. Instead of returning to his earlier position, he sunk to his knees similar to how you had done for him, his head between your legs and within seconds, his tongue connecting with your core.

He got straight to the point, so far gone he didn’t even care to tease you anymore as his tongue settled over your clit. Your hips moved back to meet his mouth, in desperate search of more and he barely even started. You were too far gone to care, much similar to him, and your body was still abuzz with the pleasure he had already granted you that night.

“Fuck, Jake.” You cried, your voice raspy and your tone breathy as your eyebrows knitted together in pleasure. His movements were different than before, more messy and much less calculated, but it almost made the entire ordeal even more enjoyable. The knowledge that he was completely feral for you alone was overwhelming, and the fact he was pleasuring you solely because he enjoyed it was something you’d never experienced before. “Please don’t stop, baby.” You pleaded, your heart thudding against your chest and your face hot with emotion. He moaned against you, assuring you he would never even dream of it. The sound appeared much more animalistic than it was before. His hands raised, grabbing your hips and pulling you back towards his face. He was working at you with desperation, like he needed it just as bad as you did.

Your stomach was tense, your legs trembling as his fingers bruised your skin. You were so close, too far gone to care about keeping yourself quiet and without a care in the world about the marks he was leaving on your body. You wanted to remember it, to wake up in the morning and see the dirty details of the night lingering on your skin. In days to come, you wanted to think of the night every time you took your clothes off, living in the feeling of being his just for a moment longer.

“Jake!” You cried, your knuckles white from your grip on the vanity. Your body ached with exhaustion, but you were in such desperate need of another climax that not even that could deter you. He hummed against you, the warmth of his tongue and the vibration of the sound working together to push you closer to the edge. You could barely think straight, your skin tingling with pleasure every time he moved. You worried that you might not survive the fall, the orgasm barreling towards you faster than you could comprehend. Then again, with him holding you, you had a lingering sense of comfort, like you could survive anything so long as he was there to support you through it.

With one last flick of his tongue, you were pushed over the edge and there was no coming back. A strangled whine tore through your chest, your legs locking in place as the sensation took hold. You were crying his name, begging him for something he couldn’t give, because not even you knew what you needed. He didn’t even think of moving away, working you through the process until you rode out the high, and even then he felt like he had to force himself away from you.

When you relaxed against him, you could barely keep your eyes open. You were so tired, so ready to curl up in bed with him by your side. You wanted to sleep soundly, so much so that you could forgo the conversation about what the two of you were and deal with it in the morning. You expected him to feel the same, but he rose to his feet with a whole new surge of energy overtaking him. Wordlessly, he helped you stand upright, spinning you around once more by your hips, but he didn’t let go this time. Instead, he lifted you up, similar to how he did earlier that night but with much more strength due to the lust working to his advantage. You wrapped your legs around him, exhausted but still able to comply to his demands. Your mind was elsewhere, your body working solely to please him as he held you to him with one hand. His other reached out, carelessly clearing the surface of the vanity with one swipe of his arm. The few items toppled over and landed on the floor, and he sat you down on the edge of it.

“I know you’re tired angel, but I need to feel you again. I can’t fucking help myself.” He explained, reaching between you and running his tip through the wetness still lingering between your legs. He was still achingly hard, in dire need of relief again despite his last orgasm only being moments before. Your eyes were drooping so close to closed, but as his cock drifted over your clit, your hips grinded forward into the feeling, in search of the very thing that might be the death of you.

Slowly, he thrusted himself forward, his dick falling into position and slowly pushing inside of you again. Unprotected sex was risky, especially after his previous orgasm, but neither of you seemed to care a bit about it, too desperate to be close to each other again. The sensation of him inside you was too much, the stretch of your walls as he filled you again so much more daunting than the last time. Still, despite your body screaming with overstimulation, you couldn’t deny how right it felt to have him so close.

“You can take it, baby. I know you can.” He encouraged, beginning a slow rock of his hips against you. The newest position allowed for a whole lot more intimacy, and you would be lying if you said you weren’t completely living for it. Your arms raised, locking around his neck and pulling him closer. “Being so, so good for me, baby.” He praised, his hands traveling over your bare back to pull your chest closer to him.

You were completely fucked out, and you had no idea how he was still going. You had a hard time imagining that you had such an effect on him, but the proof was in his actions. This time around, he was much more generous with his sweet side, and had much less control over the sounds falling from his lips. He was desperate, acting as if the control was in your hands despite his dominant aura, like he would die if he couldn’t have you for just a little longer. You never thought Jake Kiszka would be the one before you, pathetically needy and unable to resist the temptation, but you were so glad it ended up that way.

“Come here.” You muttered, pulling his face closer so you could kiss him. The taste of you on his lips still lingered, something that you were growing more used to as time went on. The sweetness of his kiss was nearly too much to bear, a pitiful moan slipping into his mouth as he continued to fuck into you. You were a mess for him, willing to let him do whatever he pleased. The best part about it was that he felt the exact same for you in the moment.

Your tongue glided over his bottom lip, begging for more attention from him. His lips parted slightly, allowing you to slip it into his mouth. The kiss was sloppy, the salvia shared between the two of you soaking your lips and coating the upper part of your chin, but it was addictive. The messiness of the action only made it even more so, and you couldn’t seem to get enough of him.

His chest was pressed against yours, his heart beat wild and matching your own. The dampness from the sweat on your skin caused the two of you to stick together, forcing you to stay in the position. His hands were grasping at your body, doing all he could to bring you closer than you could possibly get, and your hands were tangled in the mess of his hair. Neither of you wanted to break apart, so you stayed just like that for as long as you could.

As you continued to kiss him, the pressure in the pit of your stomach began to rise again, this time different than the last. It had little to do with his hips moving and everything to do with the connection you felt with him. His nose brushing against yours as he did all he could to continue the kiss was euphoric, and you couldn’t believe he wanted you so badly. After so long spent thinking he hated you, the feeling of him loving you was otherworldly. He was holding you with all of the emotion he’d kept locked up for so long, the truth coming out in a climactic and emotional manner. Your legs locked around his waist, pulling him further into you as he continued to fuck you.

For a moment, you felt like you had become one, cohesive being that survived solely off the beating of each others hearts.

You knew you were at the end, that you couldn’t possibly hold anything back. All of your willpower disappeared, your body doing as it pleased and your mind having no say over it. Without confirmation, you believed in your heart that he felt the same way as you did. He could feel the flutter of your walls around him, the telltale sign that you were close to another climax. He continued his pace, never thinking of stopping even for a moment. He needed to feel you in the most primal, visceral way possible.

“Come on, angel.” He muttered against your lips, upping the force in which he was fucking into you. “One more, baby. You can do it.” His voice was strained, like he was teetering on the same edge as you were.

“You too?” You asked, pulling away just enough so you could look over his face.

“Y-yeah,” he nodded, almost embarrassed over the fact. It only seemed to further the burning in your belly, and you wanted him just as bad as he wanted you. Neither of you cared about the consequences, only the intensity of the connection between you as he fucked you closer to the orgasm. In a permissive manner, you leaned toward and pulled him into another kiss, your mouth meeting his own and telling him everything he needed to know.

A groan rattled his chest as his hands fell to your hips, pulling you closer to him as he gave in to the feeling. You did the same, feeling your skin tingle with the intensity you’d felt so many times already. This time was different, more emotional and less physical, but it was a million times better than anything you had ever felt.

Together, the two of you reached the peak, muffling every moan and cry with your mouths. His stature faltered, falling over into you slightly as you held him tightly. Your entire body trembled as the euphoria overtook you one last time, and his hips stuttered as he pulled your hips forward onto him. For the second time, he spilled his release into you, unapologetic as he worked you through your own orgasm. Your body ached from the tension in your limbs, your ribs pained from your heart pounding against them. Your hands loosened on him as you relaxed, the moment passed you by almost as quick as it came.

Reluctantly, he parted from the kiss so he could catch his breath. His forehead rested on your own, and his eyes seemed tired, but full of love. There was no more hesitation, no reluctance or indifference in his gaze. Instead, it was replaced with the emotion he was so determined to confess, and it washed over you like summer rain. It felt better than anything ever had, and you never wanted him to look at you any other way ever again.

Silence became the two of you for a few moments, neither of you having the energy to speak. He rested inside of you, completely content with holding you there as he soaked up the last bit of intimacy the moment had to offer. Your brain was abuzz with thoughts, all pertaining to him, and for once, there was nothing negative. Finally, you were at peace, completely comfortable with the man before you. It felt right. You couldn’t deny the fact, and you were over the moon with the outcome of the entire ordeal.

Eventually, he leaned forward, placing one last, gentle kiss to your lips. It was sweet, soft, and exactly what you needed to come back to earth. A small smile was tugging at his lips as he studied your face, and finally, he spoke. The words were quiet, barely noticeable over the sound of your beating heart, but you clung to them as if it were necessary for survival.

“Let me take you out to dinner. Let me do this right.” He whispered, pulling you closer to him. Your bare chest rested against his own, his arms around your waist and as he held you tightly.

“You sure Little Miss Sunshine isn’t too much for you?” You teased, a tired smile crossing your lips as you rested your forehead against his.

“Never too much for me, sweetheart.” He shook his head, looking over the entire picture before him. He had never felt so lucky in his entire life, and he was so grateful that you decided to take a chance on him even after he’d been so rude to you. As he watched your face, he realized he was almost more excited at the prospect of sleeping next to you than he was over having sex with you. “Little Miss Sunshine’s all mine, now.” He said as a matter of fact, turning his head upwards and pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“I can get used to that.” You breathed, unable to express just how happy you were at the sound of his words. After having him in such a way, you would be stupid to let him go.

“I think I can, too.” He smiled against you, soaking up the warmth of loving you openly. You let your eyes close, leaning against him, content with staying in the position for a little while longer. The warmth of his body was alluring, and for a brief moment, you thought you might fall asleep right there in his arms.

You couldn’t believe the night had come to such a climactic end, and you never would have thought you and Jake would end up in a position like such. You were happy, relieved even that all the years of struggling to connect turned out to be a misunderstanding at the very core. You were excited for dinner, you were excited to share a bed with him, wrapped up in his arms all night long, and you were excited to know him. Finally, you could delve into more than superficialities and small talk about the weather, and you could know the boy that always seemed to make your heart beat just a little faster.

Despite all of the new and exciting things, there was still one thing that remained true amidst the chaos, and that was the fact that under no circumstance would you ever let it slip that Sam was right, because both of you knew that you would never live it down.

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seenoversundown · 7 days ago

Text

You're My Wishlist

Jake x Charlotte (Fem OC)

Warnings: 18+ Smut (warnings will be towards the end so if you want to skip them) Fluff, Christmas Cheer, Family time, A bit of yearning - which is silly because you got him Char come on girl, Sentimental moments, Cute cute cute, silly post sex comments- we know how Jake is lets be honest. SMUT WARNINGS: Oral (M & F) Hands going places, Unprotected Sex (do as I say, not as I do - WRAP IT UP, KIDS) some light ass related things, a lot of sexy commentary, lingerie, Jake is a MAN 🤭 (Soft Dom)

Word Count: 5.8k

Summary: Jake and Charlotte spend their second Christmas together, but lucky for Jake, she has a special present for him waiting at home.

Author's Note: MERRY CHRISTMAS YA FILTHY ANIMALS- there was no chance that I wouldn't write something for the festive season, lets be real. I figured since Danny is rapidly approaching his time to shine, and we just left off with these two at Thanksgiving, I may as well wrap up the year with them one more time.

I hope you enjoy it!! This is absolutely not the last you'll be hearing from them- don't worry. They're sweet banter is just what we all needed for the holiday and to warm us up a bit! Okay okay, I can't wait to hear how you feel and I will see you on the other side! 🎄❤️

A Nonsense Christmas - Sabrina Carpenter "You'll be Santa Claus and I'll be Mrs, I'll take you for a ride, I'll be your vixen."

It’s already our second Christmas we’re spending together, and getting to have him with me makes sitting with my parents a little more fun. He came with me last year, and it was one of the first times he really even met them, but thankfully, he’s so quiet and calm that they love him.

This year is different because his parents decided to extend their little vacation and stay up here for Christmas. I think they missed all the boys last year, so now, we’re spending Christmas Eve with his family and Christmas Day with mine. It feels like we’re married already.

The logistics of us spending both days together seemed ridiculous in my head— having to drive down and then back but having my car, and it was all just too much. I’m grateful that Jacob is the person he is; he switched the hours he was going to work with Josh so he could get me last night.

After spending Thanksgiving with his family and then them being around since, today has been much less overwhelming. Getting to hang out with everyone is always so fun, even though we see most of them almost daily. It proves how attached Jacob and I are because we spend the entire time waiting for a reason to be next to each other.

This catches us up to where we are now; I don’t think he’s aware of how attractive he is, even when he’s not trying at all. He decided to wear the same outfit he wore when we kissed for the first time, whether he knew that or did it by accident— regardless, my mouth was watering over him.

It’s just a flannel and jeans, really, but it’s how he looks in them. I just can’t help but think of how adorable he was that night anytime he wears even a variation of it. He’s actually a lot more covered than usual, but it’s only because of the cold.

Now I’m standing here with his family, watching him from across the room, and I still get butterflies when I catch him staring back. I slide my phone out, quickly texting him. I know I could just go see him, but it’s more fun this way.

Me: baby you look so good tonight 😍

Seeing how he smiles at his phone before glancing at me, that man is mine. Mine, mine, mine. All mine. The smirk on his lips alone makes my knees weak. He looks back to his phone, typing quickly and then tucking it under his leg.

Jacob 🖤: just for you, beautiful 😘

“So, how has work been for you?” His dad’s voice caught me off guard.

“Oh!” I let slip out. I composed myself quickly and told him, “We’ve been so busy lately, but we were actually given a few days off because of the holidays, so I can’t complain.”

He chuckles to himself before quietly saying, “Hopefully, you get to enjoy your time off.”

With Jacob? Absolutely, I will.

“How have things been for you?” I ask him. Listening as he tells me how they’re glad they stayed up here a bit longer, I see Jake walking over out of the corner of my eye.

His arm slides around me, feeling his hand firmly planted on my side, keeping me close to him. I glance over at him, whispering, “Hi.” His little smile is enough of a response for me.

His dad chimed in, mentioning something about the bar, but frankly, I was too focused on the handsome man I was attached to.

Watching Jake as he starts telling him, “Yeah, actually, I just—“

And that’s about all I heard. I just stare absentmindedly at how his mouth moves when he talks or how he uses his hands. His fingers tap against me every so often as he explains things, but he always squeezes me or rubs my side when he stops.

He glances over at me. “Well, I’ll let you two finish catching up, I think I’m being put on Santa duty this year.” Pressing a kiss to the side of my head, he carefully lets his hand run over my ass as he walks off.

Santa, huh?

His mom sneaks over, her voice distracting me, “So, Jake said you’re seeing your parents tomorrow.”

“Yes! They’re excited to see him, which is sweet.”

“Oh, I’m so glad they like him,” she breathes out. A small giggle sneaks out of her as she tells me, “I’m partial to him.”

“No, they love him,” I reassure her quickly. “I wasn’t super worried because he’s so laid back, but my parents being who they are definitely made me concerned for a minute.” My eyes go wide, and a slight cringe on my face.

“Well, you never have to worry about us,” she says, grabbing my arm gently. “All of us love you and think you’re perfect for him.”

“He’s pretty great,” I let out. Looking over at him again, I really do love him so much. “Hopefully, he keeps me around.”

She laughs, which is oddly relieving. “Oh, don't be silly! Have you seen the way he looks at you? You’re not going anywhere, sweetheart.”

“Good,” I giggle out quietly. “That means we get to hang out more, too,” I whisper, gesturing between the two of us.

Her arm wraps around me quickly, “That’s the best part about it, isn’t it?”

I find myself watching him as I hang out with his parents and Quinn, just listening to them ask Quinn about school. Even just him sitting on the couch, with the glow of the Christmas tree, he isn’t doing anything in particular other than existing– he’s so fine. I slide my phone out subtly, texting him and then tucking it back under my arm.

Me: What if i said i want you to unwrap me like a present and play with me? 🥰

I can see him fighting a smile as he peeks over at me, shaking his head subtly. Watching him blush over little things is my favorite hobby. I have found it really precious that even after a year, he still gets flustered easily.

Jacob🖤: honey

I send him a little wink before I run off to help his mom with some snacks in the kitchen. Spending time with her during holidays has really become one of my favorite things. She’s quite possibly the nicest person I’ve ever met— her kids are absolutely a product of that.

She was so welcoming to me, even after the situation when we started dating. It was almost like she knew something must have been going on prior to me having a conversation with her one-on-one. Thankfully, we do get along incredibly well, and I couldn’t wish for a better potential mother-in-law. Just thinking that I could call him my husband one day makes me sweat.

Wandering back into the living room, I watch him rearranging the gifts closer to where everybody has slowly been sitting down. He grabs the stockings that his mom put together for everybody, setting them with their piles of gifts. It only takes a minute of being himself before I slide my phone back out.

He spends a few more minutes organizing everything before sitting back in his spot on the couch. He glances over to me, a little smile on his lips. I silently just shake my phone, watching his eyes move down and then grabbing it from his pocket.

Me: I can put on some tall socks later and you can stuff me instead 🤭

His eyes get wide reading my text, shifting a little in his seat as he rubs his face to help prevent himself from reacting. How is he so—? Looking up at me, but his stare felt different. I swear I could see his pupils dilate from across the room.

His quiet voice, barely legible through the chatter of everyone else, “Come here.” His hand patted his thigh as he told me, and if anything was going to light a fire in me, it was that.

His hand slid around my waist as I sat down on his lap; there was absolutely plenty of space that I could just sit next to him, but this was definitely more fun.

“You’re taking this whole Santa bit seriously, huh?” I ask him quietly.

His giggle made his body shake a little as he leaned forward. His face turned so only I could hear him. His voice lowered when he asked, “Have you been a good girl?”

My heart about stopped; oh my god. Without hesitation, I carefully cross my legs, unprepared for him to say something like that. I never expected that to be so sexy.

“What’s wrong, Honey?” his question taunted, as his hand squeezes my thigh just hard enough to make me sweat. I may tease him through text, but the moment he opens his mouth, I’m done for.

“Nothing, baby,” I tell him, a small smile forming on my face. “Just excited to give you a present I forgot at home.”

His eyes bounced to my lips and back before letting out, “Can’t wait.”

The sound of wrapping paper ripping distracted the both of us quickly.

The difference between our families is wild to see. I don’t know if it’s because all three of the boys, when they were younger, just couldn’t stomach waiting, but their parents just let them go wild with opening things. I just kind of watch for a second as they’re all handing gifts back and forth and starting to open them.

My family is way more quiet, and it was only my sister and I, which, given our age gap, made it a lot easier for us to take our time with Christmas gifts. They typically let me go first since I was younger and too excited, but everyone took turns, so it was a drawn-out process in our house.

Their parents just watched as everyone started opening things, and the loud chatter only got worse with the mix of ‘Thank you’s. It’s easy to tell that they love spoiling their kids, but I think they just like getting to spend time with them since they’re all adults now. Seeing how their parents treat them– it makes sense why all three of them are the way they are.

Unwrapping a gift from his mom, a deep forest green knit sweater sits in my lap. It’s so soft. I looked over at her, and she already had eyes on me, apparently.

“Thank you,” I tell her excitedly. “It’s so cute!”

She blows a kiss at me, “You’ll have to show me whatever outfit you put together.” She shoots me a little wink before turning to Sam as he starts to tell her something.

I could just watch all of them interact with each other and be happy about it. The dynamic between all of them is just so loving and sweet. Knowing full well that when the boys were kids, I can only imagine that it was harder. But seeing everybody as adults, and especially since all of their boys now have partners to share the holidays with, it’s adorable to see how their parents act around them.

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

After a bit, everybody slowly started losing steam, so we took the chance to get out while we could. We both knew it would take a minute for us to be able to leave since we had to say ‘goodnight’ to everyone, even though we will see the bulk of them this week anyway. The drive to my apartment felt like nothing, maybe because I was selfishly excited to just spend time with him alone.

Staring at him while he drives is a gift on its own. His side profile could be hung in a museum. Listening to his soft little voice after hours spent surrounded by his family, it’s honestly comical how differently he has to speak when Sam and Josh are in the room. It’s not like we don’t see each other enough, but knowing we have to share our time with family, so of course, I’m going to eat up any second I have him to myself. Just getting to enjoy the feeling of his hand on my leg as he drives. But nothing beats the view of his hand gripping the steering wheel. Mmm.

I’m not always proud of the fact that his hands were one of the first things I fully focused on when I met him, but they’re wildly nice. They’re also fairly large, which is baffling because he’s not a big man by any means. Even just getting a small glimpse of his wrist gets me going, his sleeve sliding down slightly. I don’t know what it is about him that makes this happen to me, but I’m not going to complain.

His other hand flexed on my thigh, watching the way his fingers pressed into my leg for a second, giving it a little squeeze; how he puts rings on when we have plans that aren’t just sitting in the bar because he’s definitely figured out that I’m obsessed with it. But honestly, it’s hard not to be obsessed. He can’t exist without casually touching me, which I still get butterflies from even after a year. The moment he sits in the driver’s seat, his hand searches for mine or my leg. If we’re out somewhere, he’s holding my hand, touching my back, pulling me closer to him so people can sneak by us, but leaving his hands wherever they’ve landed.

“So, about this gift you forgot?” he softly asks, his thumb grazing over the back of my hand as he does. My head whips over to him– didn’t realize how zoned out I actually was.

I just hum back, “Mhmm?”

“Did you really forget or..” kept his voice low, but the little smirk on his lips sold him out. Oh, that little shit. He probably has spent the last couple of hours trying to decide what it is and, more than likely, is on the right track with it.

Looking at the time and seeing that we’re almost to my apartment, I make the executive decision to rile him up a little more.

I let out quietly, “It’s something I wouldn’t want your mom to see.” Reaching over and tuck some of his hair behind his ear so I have a clearer view of his sweet face. Even in the dark, I can see the red creep into his cheeks as it clicks in his brain.

“I love you,” he giggles out, pulling my hand up to kiss the back of it a few times.

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Once we’ve made it inside, dropping our bags that Jake insisted he could carry all of. I watch him plop himself down onto my couch, curling up with one of the throw pillows as he watches me put some of my things away.

“Hey you,” he says, barely loud enough to get my attention. “You can clean tomorrow.”

Pouting at him, I whisper back, “I only have like two more things.”

“Well, hurry up,” he giggles, with a big cheesy grin on his face. “I need to know what this gift is before I lose my mind.” I can feel the excitement radiating from him.

“Ohhhh,” I teased him. “Just stay there for me– I’ll go get it.” Shooting him a little wink as I scurried off into my room.

Pulling the lingerie from my drawer— there’s not much to it. Slipping on the bottoms before working on the top. I spent too much time scrolling, trying to find a cute Christmas set to surprise him, and with that, I ended up here. The bra basically just being a ribbon that you tie over your tits, dreading to admit that it is actually kind of cute once it’s on. I step in front of the mirror to make sure the bow is even. Oh, he’s going to lose his mind, regardless.

Fluffing my hair up a little and reapplying some lipstick, I do one more little spin in front of the mirror before ripping the metaphorical band-aid off.

“Baby,” I say loudly as I open my door. “Are you ready?”

“I don’t know, am I?”

I can’t help but giggle at his little voice. Telling him quietly, “Probably not.” Rounding the corner to my living room where he is.

“Oh my–” falls out of him. His hand covering his mouth as he mumbles, “Holy shit, Char.”

“Worth the wait?” I ask quietly, feeling the blood rush into my face. Something about standing in front of him in this as he just stares at me makes my body feel warm.

“I– um,” he hesitates as he stands up from the couch, taking a few steps over to me. His hands grab mine, and holding my arms out as his eyes take down my body. “You’re always gorgeous, but this is something.”

“Oh, let me show you–” I spit out, starting to slowly spin around, still holding one of his hands.

“Honey, fuck me,” he whispers. Just listening to him fall apart is already fun. “My god.” To be fair— the bottoms do not really cover much… which was probably a little mean of me.

“Well, I just thought,” I start, stepping closer to him. “Since you work so hard—“ I adjust the collar on his flannel, trying to avoid eye contact with him because I know he’s already struggling.

He raises his eyebrows but just hums back, “Mhmm.”

My hands run down his chest as I keep going, “And you do so much for me—“ I press myself into him, batting my lashes at him a few times.

“Anything for you,” his eyes soften, but the little smile on his lips is devious.

“And I love you so so much,” I tell him, running my finger down the slope of his nose and then holding the side of his face. Feeling his hands slide around my waist as I tell him, “You deserved something extra special for Christmas.”

“Is that right?” He asks, his voice a bit lower.

“Mhmm,” I hum back before whispering, “Whatever you want.”

He leans in, kissing me gently before asking, “You sure about that?”

I just nod, wrapping my arms around his neck and walking him toward the couch. He sits down, pulling me into his lap. Instantly, his hands are sliding up my thighs.

I move to straddle him, sitting up on my knees for a second, and I watch the gears in his head start turning. It takes less than a second before the cool air hits my skin.

“Oops,” he lets out quietly, giggling to himself as the bow comes undone. His hands wrap around my rib cage, pulling me closer, leaving little kisses against my sternum.

His hands move to grab my ass; his smirk into me is so cute, but it makes me nervous. Watching him not know what to do as he slides his hands up my body, giving my tits a little squeeze.

I whisper, not to distract him too much, “I love when you’re like this.”

“Yeah?” His eyes glance up at me as I’m still hovering over him a bit.

“Mhm,” I hum. Deciding to lean into it a little, I tell him, “You’re always so gentle; it’s fun when you let loose a little.”

His stare changed slightly, but a little smile crept onto his face.

“In that case,” he lets out, wrapping an arm around me, picking me up as he stands but quickly plopping me back down onto the couch and crawling over me, sliding his leg in between mine, pressing it against me when he leaned down to kiss me. Fighting every urge as the pressure alone already feels good.

Leaving wet kisses against my neck, working his way down until I watch his face light up as he’s brushing his thumbs over my nipples. A small whimper sneaks out of me, which makes him look up.

“Does that feel good?” he asks; the tone of his voice makes me shiver. He carefully rolls them between his thumb and index fingers, his jaw going a little slack while he stares at me. My legs twitch around his at the feeling. “Oh, it’s that good, huh?”

All I can do is nod. My hands reach to grab his shirt, but he’s quick to grab my wrists, pinning them above me with one of his hands. My breathing is heavy as he hovers over me; he just stares at me for a minute.

“You said whatever you want,” he whispers, leaning in close to my face.

All I can manage is a small “mhm.”

He brushes his lips over mine– his smile making my heart race. He lowers his voice when he tells me, “Then be a good girl and let me play with you.”

My hips defy me, grinding against his thigh as a quiet moan slips out. He’s so sexy, oh my god.

“Oohh,” he coos, taunting me. “You do like when I call you that.”

I just bite my lip gently as I look back at him. I don’t know what’s come over him but I’m not about to fight it.

“Thought you got away with it earlier,” he says smugly. “I knew you crossed your legs because I made your pretty little cunt ache.”

My jaw drops at how he’s speaking, letting out a quiet “Jacob.”

His sweet little laugh as he leans in to kiss me, feeling the smile against me, taking every chance to kiss his cupid's bow until he mumbles against me, “What, honey?”

“You’re just,” I start, but the way he’s smiling at me makes my brain stall. “Um, you’re so—“

His little raspy voice chimed in, “Tell me.”

I stare at him in awe; Jacob’s never like this, so forward. He giggles quietly at my lack of response, his free hand holding the side of my face, letting his thumb run over my cheek gently.

“Mmm, that’s okay,” he whispers, his hand sliding down my neck until I feel him lightly trace circles around one of my nipples. He dips down, wrapping his lips around it, following that same circular movement with his tongue. A small groan comes from me at the feeling when he moves to the other side, teasing me the same way but quietly letting out a small ‘mmm.’ His lips leave a trail of wet kisses down the middle of my chest.

“Keep these here, alright?” he whispers, squeezing my wrists a few times. I nod at him, biting the inside of my lip. Watching as he sat up, grabbing both of my legs and lifting them– blocking any view I had of whatever he was going to do. Until I feel his tongue flat against my clit, sending a shiver through my body.

His mouth is warm against me, knowing all the right places to be, god he’s too good at this. The moans practically fall out of me when he slips one of his fingers inside. Years of working with his hands really are just a godsend for me– he can ruin my life with minimal effort.

Pushing my legs closer to my chest, I feel his mouth moving lower. Um.. But he picks up the pace with his hand, and my mind goes blank again.

“Mmm, baby,” I let out quietly. Feeling the little smirk on his face as he kisses the inside of my thigh.

Gently biting at it before he tells me, “I have an idea.”

Pulling me up to him, planting a kiss on me, and whispering, “Turn around for me.”

I’ve never moved quicker– turning around and leaning down onto my elbows. The feeling of him gently sliding his hands over my legs gives me butterflies. His breath against my skin alone made me feel a bit desperate, knowing that I was littered with goosebumps.

His lips made contact with my ass, leaving a few kisses on me before he mumbled, “God, I love you.”

The gasp I let out when his fingers make contact with my clit, almost maddening how he knows just how to move to make everything feel better. Sliding them to feel how wet he’s made me, which he doesn’t have to try for that to happen. Just knowing he’s behind me is enough.

Moans keep sneaking out of me, which only keeps him motivated. Feeling his free hand grabbing at my ass every so often, always following it with a small kiss until he just spreads me open.. holding it there for a moment. The cool air hit places I hadn’t anticipated, which felt oddly vulnerable.

“Whatever I want, right?” he asks.

I glance back over my shoulder slightly, “Mhm.”

“You’re sure?”

I give him a slight nod; what is he doing?

Without hesitation, he flicks his tongue against my clit, making sweet little circles around it. Licking a wide stripe up, finding it harder to resist grinding against him. He lingers there for a second; I swear I can feel that he’s nervous.

My jaw falls open as his tongue makes contact, not having felt anything like that before. He laps at me like he’s starving and slips one of his fingers back into me, pressing down as he does. Holy shit.

“Baby– oh my god,” slips out louder than I wish it did. My hands are grabbing desperately at the couch cushion, not knowing what else to do. Truthfully, I’d never been comfortable enough with a man to let him near my ass like this, but Jacob is different.

Pulled from my thoughts when his hand rapidly started rubbing my clit; the tension from my orgasm building about to burst. His tongue presses harder into me when it hits. A light layer of sweat covers me as my hands death-grip the couch.

He whispers, “Stay right here for me, honey.” Luckily for him, I don’t think I could move if I wanted to.

He’s only gone for maybe a minute before he’s sat in front of me, tucking some hair away from my face. He leans in, kissing my cheek a few times, mumbling, “I cleaned up, don’t worry.” I giggle into him, soaking up the feeling of his lips on mine.

He slides the flannel off and then pulls his shirt over his head with one hand— no matter how many times I’ve seen him do that, it’s still hot.

“Sit up for me,” he tells me. I turned to face him, still sitting on my knees. My hands flew to unbutton his jeans for him. Dragging them down his legs until his hand is holding my jaw, laughing into a kiss as he finishes pulling them off. “Mmm, open for me, yeah?”

He stands fully; I can’t take my eyes off him. Watching him as he stroked himself a couple of times, and my mouth fell open like he asked. He slides himself in, and my lips wrap around him instantly. His hands hold the sides of my head as he starts gently thrusting himself into my mouth.

I keep my eyes on his face— the way his eyes are closed and that delicious little pout of his. Occasionally, his mouth falls open slightly, especially when he’s hitting the back of my throat gently. Listening to the little moans come from him, he sounds so sweet.

He pulls back completely, leaning down to kiss me— this man I swear. Grabbing me, he just picks me up, turning me to face the back of the couch. Instinctually propping my arms up on the back of the couch, I push my ass into him a little.

Taking no time, he slides himself into me, slowly pushing his cock all the way in. Maybe he was onto something with the “cunt aching” thing because, good god, I needed that.

He gently fucks me, his hips moving at a crawling pace. I let out a few small ‘mmm’s knowing that’s what gets him going; his hands squeezing my hips every time.

“Mmm, my beautiful girl,” he lets out. My heart pounds at his voice. “Taking my cock so well.”

“Jake,” I moan, unable to hold it in. Where has he been hiding all this?

He leans over me, kissing my shoulder blade lightly. His hips stop moving for a second— just long enough for him to whisper, “If you want me to stop, just tell me. Okay?” And there’s my sweet Jacob again.

Turning my face, so I can just barely see him. I open my mouth to respond to him, but the only thing that comes out is, “Oh.” His thumb lightly grazes my other hole, sending a chill through my body, and I can feel my face heat up. Why does that feel kinda..

“Is that okay?” He asks quietly.

Shyly I mumble back, “um.. yes.”

His hips start to move again as he gently adds pressure with his thumb— the moan coming out of me sounds feral. Holy shit.

Every noise that escapes me makes him snap his hips harder into me. He grabs one of my hands, pulling it back towards him and resting it on his wrist before his thumb starts pushing a bit harder.

The feeling of it starting to slip in, I can’t fight the gasp I let out. He keeps slowly pushing it further, and I have to admit that it feels good, littering the air with my moans, his hips slamming into me, and he finally slips his thumb into me. My hand grabs his wrist quickly at the feeling.

“Hun—“ his voice sounds serious.

My head falls back, the sweat starts forming again, and I tell him, “Baby, I’m close—“

He wraps his arm around me, pulling me up against him but gently moving his hand away. His face tucked into my neck, whispering, “Let me have it.”

“Come with me,” I moan.

He snakes his hand down, barely touching my clit, and I can already feel myself about to break.

“Tell me where,” he says, his lips grazing the shell of my ear. My brain feels fuzzy as I try to focus on his voice, but the rest of him is driving me crazy.

“Baby— fuck,” I spit out. “Come in me.” My body leans forward a little, my legs starting to shake as my orgasm hits. “Fuck, Jacob. Come, baby.”

His hips are getting sloppy, and I can feel him release. His sweet moans littered the air, a slew of ‘fuck’s as he came down from it– leaving kisses on my shoulder when I heard him giggling.

He backs up from me, but I feel something soft immediately covering me. What is he-? Glancing down, he’s holding his shirt against me so I can sit and not mess up my couch. Ew, I love him.

“What are you on about, giggles?”

He just smiles at me, shaking his head.

“Jacob, you’re gonna end up telling me. Spit it out,” I say, laughing with him.

“Hun, it’s just—“ he starts, cutting himself off with a laugh. I’d watch him smile like this forever, even if I never got the rest of his thought. “How am I supposed to look your parents in the eye tomorrow?” Laughing with him this time, he has a point.

“It won’t be that bad..” I try to make him feel better.

He wipes his hand over his mouth, looks at me, and fights his smile when he says, “Honey, please. I just ate your ass and came inside you— at what point is it not that bad?”

“JACOB,” I bark out, my face heating up as I laugh.

He walks back over, kissing the top of my head before mumbling, “Come on, you– let’s get you cleaned up.”

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I come out into the living room after showering, and he’s already sitting on the couch. Just seeing him comfortable and not actively checking on the bar is nice.

Naturally, I’m crawling into his lap; nothing is better than being close to him. He would just pull me into him anyway.

“I have something for you,” he whispers.

“Oh?”

“Mhmm. Here,” he says, handing me a small present.

Quickly peeling back the wrapping paper, a small ornament is sitting in my hands. A little gold frame that looks vintage, with a cute picture of us from a date night a few weeks ago.

We found a little Christmas market that was going on in Portland and of course, they had so many cute background options. This specific photo was one of the last ones we took because we were both cold and getting delirious, which you can tell by the way he squished my face a little in his hand as he kissed me. It’s my favorite one; he looks so happy even if I forced him into a million pictures that night.

Flipping it over, I noticed that he put the year in the bottom corner but wrote, ‘one more?’ in the middle because I definitely asked him every photo if we could just take ‘one more.’

“Jacob,” I whisper, my throat a little tight at how sweet he is. “I love it— I love you.”

He kisses the side of my head gently, “I’m glad— I love you so much.”

I stand up from him, walking right over to the skinny tree I have decorated and rearranged a few things to be able to hang this one up.

Standing back and looking at it, my eyes tear up a little. I take a deep breath as I stare at it; I don’t know what I did to deserve this man. Feeling his arms slide around me and his face tuck into my neck, pressing a little kiss into the side of it.

“Merry Christmas, honey,” he whispers, letting his lips rest on my cheek, and I can feel the smile on his face.

I lean back into him, my heart fluttering because I absolutely just fell in love with him all over again. I turned to look at him, his eyes sparkling from the lights on the tree. Nothing will ever compare to this feeling. If he only knew that he’s the greatest gift I’ll ever get. I lean in, pressing a kiss against his lips and whispering, “You too, baby.”

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FDOG Master Post | Masterlist | Playlist

Sam & Willa : Sparrow Of The Dawn

Josh & Quinn : Amongst The Stars

Danny & Melody : Coming January 1st

Caravel Tavern 😉

Taglist:

@gvfsstardust @myleftsock @dont-go-home-without-me @literal-dead-leaf

@lizzys-sunflower @mackalah @klarxtr @edgingthedarkness @writingcold

@takenbythemadness @earthgrlsreasy @peaceloveunitygvf

@josh-iamyour-mama @anythingforjtk

@broken0mens @whereiskeara @gvf-luna @katuschka @threadofstars @i-love-gvf

@jazzyfigz @smoking-jakelane @gretavanfan @scoreofinfantryvines

@demonrat444 @hollyco @ourlovesdesire

@musicspeaks @wrldabomination @chloeshell1219

@becinabubblegvf @sanguinebats @lallisonl

@nicoleghost18 @lightmy-love @myownparadise96 @cheersdannyx2

@musicislove3389 @allof--mylove @hailthegodsong @fleetingjake

@Mohollandtx @hearts-hunger

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kissingkiszka · 11 months ago

Text

The Sweet Symphony - Jake Kiszka x Reader Series Masterlist

Summary: this series follows an unexpected love between the reader and Jake Kiszka, guitarist of Greta Van Fleet. Will the love blossom after you spontaneously decide to leave all you know behind and join Greta Van Fleet on tour?

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12: (coming soon!)

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ageofbajabule · 1 year ago

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My baby Jake😭 awww Court you write this so well🩷🩷 I’m so glad you’re back

What Is and What Should Never Be Ch. 6

A/N: i know this one took me a hot minute. but to be honest, i haven’t really been motivated to write. this story is going to have a lot of sensitive subject matter in future chapters and i will do my best to make sure all the proper warnings are in place. but if by chance i do miss something, or you’re not happy about something i write, please DM me to open a discussion about it. i appreciate any and all feedback🩵

Word Count: 8.5k

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, No smut but suggestive language and allusions to sex, Angst, Toxic Theme(Possessiveness, Arguing, Fighting, Accusations, Cheating)

…I can’t make my own decisions or make any with precision // Well, maybe you should tie me up so I don’t go where you don’t want me…

You cautiously stepped through the front door of Highway Tunes, keeping an eye out for Josh. When you saw he was busy with a customer, you made a beeline for the bathroom, feeling the remnants of Jake between your thighs.

“Y/N, what the fuck?” Josh whisper-yelled from the end of the hallway just before you could enter the restroom. You slowly turned to face him, preparing yourself to be scolded. He came closer, standing right in front of you, “I don’t appreciate being taken advantage of… If this thing with you and my brother is hindering you from doing what you were hired for, you’re gonna need to find another job. Don’t let it happen again.” He stalked out of the hallway before you could respond and you finally burst into the bathroom.

Locking the door, you turned the faucet on, letting the sound echo through the small space as you splashed water over your face. You were in shock at Josh's outburst, not that you didn’t deserve it…but the anger you felt radiating from him is what really troubled you. You wanted to rush out and apologize, plead for his forgiveness and promise that you’d never let it happen again, but when you finally went back to the front of the store and saw him, the look in his eyes made you stay far away.

The afternoon stayed busy enough that you could easily keep your distance from Josh but, every so often, you would feel him staring at you. You did everything in your power to avoid looking at him, just counting down the minutes until shift change when he would finally leave and take the suffocating tension with him. Much to your dismay, you were having an issue with the barcode scanner while ringing a young woman up and you had to swallow your pride to talk to Josh. “Excuse me for just a second, hun… I need to get my boss.” You stepped away from the counter to search for him, finding him in the corner, typing on his phone. Approaching him slowly, you tapped his shoulder, “Uhh, Josh? There’s a problem with the scanner… I don’t- can you come help me?”

He turned to face you, his expression begging to say something that his mouth wouldn’t allow. Instead, he simply nodded his head and followed you back to the counter. You stood back, watching as he flashed the customer his perfect smile. “Cam, hey!” He greeted her with a gleeful hug and you assumed she was another regular that you hadn’t met yet until she pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“I didn’t expect you to be here today, babe.” The woman, Cam, pulled back but her hand remained on Josh’s hip and you couldn’t help the sting of jealousy you felt at the tiny, intimate gesture. “Where have you been? I haven’t heard from you in like, a month…” Her tone was accusatory and it intrigued you; Who is she? What’s the relationship between her and Josh?

He glanced at you briefly before stepping out of her grasp and moving behind the counter. “Uh…yeah, I don’t know.” He kept his head down, fiddling with the scanner, and there was suddenly an awkward tension in the air. “I’ve just been busy, I guess. We were spread pretty thin and short staffed, but Olivia is back for good and we got a new hire… Uhh, Y/N.” Josh pointed to you with a soft smile, one you hadn’t received since Jake dropped you back off. “She’s pretty fucking great… I was lucky to find her…” His eyes drooped with a sad and silent apology before he put his attention back on the scanner.

The girl held her hand out to you with a friendly grin, “Well she’s beautiful, isn’t she?” She cut her eyes back to Josh, giving him a smirk, as you slipped your hand into hers. “Y/N, huh? I’m Cameron, preferably Cam.” Her dark, spiral curls cascaded over her shoulders and brought out the deep, olive tones of her skin. When her gaze returned to you, she released your hand and leaned her elbow on the counter as she took in your appearance. “So, how did a sweet thing like you end up here?”

You could feel your cheeks heat as your eyes fell to the floor to avoid her intense stare. “I umm… They were just the first place with a ‘Now Hiring’ sign…and Josh doesn’t make it easy to say no.” You laughed quietly before looking back up at her.

You heard your boss clear his throat to get her attention, but Cam didn’t seem bothered, almost acting as though he weren’t there. “D’you just move here? I’ve never seen you around before.” She stood up straight and stepped a little closer when you nodded your head, “Oh…Well, if you ever want a tour of the city or to just hangout…maybe you-.”

“No, Cameron.” Josh’s tone was flat and final but he forced a fake cough to clarify when she whipped around to face him, “Wrong tree, Cam. She’s…with Jake.” He turned back to the computer, clicking a few buttons, and grabbed her record to run it in front of the scanner. The beep echoed in the hanging silence and he used the opportunity to end the current topic, “Look at that. Scanner works… Your total is $34.98.” He was making it obvious that he wanted to get her out of there but she ignored him.

“No fucking way…” She turned back to you, her mouth slightly agape, “Jake? Mister ‘No Strings Attached’ Jake? He scooped you up?” Cam faced Josh again, leaving you no room to answer her question. “How the fuck… I thought he-.” She clamped her mouth shut when he pressed his lips together in a warning. Tossing her debit card on the counter, she chanced one more look at you with a half smile, “It was nice to meet you, Y/N… I’m sure you’ll see me again soon.”

He gave her the card back and passed her the bagged vinyl, “I’ll call you. We can meet for drinks this weekend.” She nodded before heading for the door and you waved a quiet goodbye to her as she left and disappeared down the sidewalk. You chanced a quick look back at Josh and turned away to find something to occupy yourself. “Y/N, wait…” His hand was on your shoulder, stopping you from walking away from him, “I- The way I lashed out earlier…I’m sorry.”

“Josh, you don’t owe me an apology. I fucked up and I can promise that it…won’t happen again.” You faced him fully, but kept your eyes on the floor. “We- I lost track of time and I feel awful. I don’t want you to think that I’m not serious about my job just because-... This is my top priority and I’ll make sure Jake knows that too.” You fought to keep your hands from fidgeting by folding them together behind your back.

Josh hooked a finger under your chin, pulling your gaze from the floor to meet his face. “I know you weren’t late on purpose, Y/N. I just-.” He dropped his hand, drawing in a deep inhale when you locked eyes with him. “You make me fucking crazy in a way that i’ve never felt before and… You know what, it doesn’t matter.” He was shaking his head back and forth, waving his hands as though he wanted to shoo his thoughts away. “Just know that I wouldn’t fire you. It was an empty threat from the beginning.” His voice trailed off and now he was avoiding your eyes.

You didn’t know what to say; part of you wanted him to elaborate on how you made him crazy, but the other part knew you wouldn’t be able to handle the answer appropriately. “Josh…” Your breath caught in your throat when he looked at you, his large brown eyes, soft and bright. You lifted a hand to his face, mindlessly sweeping a stray eyelash from his cheek, and he leaned into your touch, his lips just barely grazing your palm. You both froze, eyes locked, for several moments, and if it weren’t for the door chime ringing out, causing you to jump and retract your hand, you weren’t sure what may have transpired. “Uhh. I’ll…get that.”

“Y/N.” He glanced at the customer, who had their back to you as they perused the rack of new release albums, before grabbing your wrist. “I- I’m sorry. I have to stop doing this shit…” He released his grip and stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I know that you’re with Jake and I don’t want you to think that I don’t respect that, but I really fucking like you.” Josh paused when you began chewing on your lip, all of his focus going to your mouth before he stuttered through the rest of his thought. “You’re so- I mean, I- Shit…”

“Excuse me?” You both turned in unison to the customer, an older gentleman, as he interrupted Josh. “I’m looking for something for my granddaughter, might one of you be able to help me?”

You gave him a polite smile, “Of course, sir. You tell me what you need and I will be more than happy to assist.” You listened to the man explain what he was looking for as you led him to the tables, only stealing one glance over your shoulder to find your boss watching you.

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“Hey, you alright?” Josh asked, a tinge of concern in his tone, when he found you leaning on the counter with your head in your hands.

You rubbed your palms over your face and looked up at him. “Yeah. I just have a headache…waiting for the ibuprofen to kick in.” You forced a quiet chuckle as you stood up straight, “I guess I should’ve actually eaten on my lunch break.”

His brows pinched together as he glanced at the clock on the wall. “You haven’t ate anything today?” When you meekly shook your head, he let out a frustrated huff and stalked into the office. You heard some things shuffling around before he reemerged a moment later holding something out to you. “Why the hell would he take you out on your lunch break and not fucking feed you?” He wasn’t asking you directly, more so thinking out loud. “Eat these… Please.”

You took the package from his hand, a little bag of pretzels, “Thank you…” You murmured it quietly and ripped the bag open to pop a pretzel into your mouth. “It wasn’t his fault. I just…got distracted.” Slipping into the office, you took a seat in one of the chairs to finish the small snack.

Josh followed you in and leaned back on the edge of the desk, looking down at you. “Why didn’t you just order something for delivery when you got back here?”

“I don’t know…” You pulled your phone from your pocket to check the time; it was almost 4 o’clock, which meant Jake would be in for the closing shift any minute, but also that Olivia would be in too, and you weren’t in the mood. “I’m not gonna lie, Josh… You kind of scared me when I got back. Food was the last thing on my mind and even if it wasn’t, I wouldn’t have ordered out of fear that it would piss you off even more.” You gave him an honest answer as you finished the last pretzel and dropped the bag into the trash can.

“Look at me, sweetheart.” Josh crouched down in front of you, placing his hands on your knees, and waited for you to obey. “I don’t want you to ever think there’s a reason to be scared of me. I lost my temper and I’m sorry.” He stared into your eyes and you nodded, fully conscious of the way his thumbs rubbed circles over your leggings. “If you miss lunch again, or you’re hungry at all, I keep the bottom left drawer stocked full of snacks. You can help yourself whenever, okay?”

“Ummm. Am I interrupting something?” Olivia was standing in the office doorway, her eyes darting between you and Josh. “I just wanted to clock in… Is Jake here yet?”

He stood up with his ever-gleaming smile. “Hello, Olivia. It’s so very pleasant to see you too.” His tone dripped with sarcasm as he slithered around her to exit the office and you followed suit, holding a hand over your mouth to stifle your laughter.

Just as you stepped out from behind the counter, an arm wrapped your waist and pulled you around the corner towards the back of the store. “Miss me, peach?”

You yelped and spun in his hold, lightly slapping his chest. “Don’t do that, Jake! I almost pissed myself.”

“Too bad I’m not into golden showers…” He joked with a playful smirk and you shoved out of his grasp.

“God, you’re disgusting.” You giggled and made a move to walk past him, but he grabbed you again and pulled you close to kiss you. You stopped him, holding a finger over his lips before prying his hands from your hips, “Not at work, Jake. Respect the rules.” You broke away from him to do a quick clean up and return any discarded products to where they belong.

“Rules?” He was trailing behind you, close enough that you could feel his body heat. “What the fuck do you mean rules? I can’t touch you? Is that a rule, because I-.”

You cut him off as you stopped walking and turned back to him, grabbing his face, “Work is my main priority, babe. I get paid to do a specific job and that job isn’t being your girlfriend… So at work, we keep it professional.” Dropping your hands, you went back to your task, but he was still lingering.

“Does that mean I can’t take my girlfriend in the storage room for a quick fuck on our shifts?” He reached out, cupping your asscheek before giving it a sharp tap.

“Jake, I’m serious…” You took a few steps away, facing him with a scowl. “Josh wasn’t happy about lunch and I don’t want my boss to think that I’m just gonna blow my responsibilities off because I’m fucking my other boss…who happens to be his brother, might I add.”

His face twisted into a frown as he looked around the store. “Did he say something to you? Where is he?”

You caught his arm before he could stomp away and placed a hand over his chest. “Hey, relax. I talked to him and it’s fine, but I just need to set boundaries. For myself. Okay?” Leaning in, you pecked his lips, allowing your mouth to linger on his for a few seconds in the hopes it would calm him down.

“Okay.” His jaw flexed as he clenched his teeth. “We’ll keep it…professional.”

You pulled your hands from his body, but not before Olivia had seen you touching him. “You’re just suckering up to both of them today, aren’t you, peach.” She popped the ‘p’ with a venomous smile, flashing her gaze to Jake.

“Both of us?” He looked at you, studying your expression for a moment as his eyes narrowed. He huffed a short laugh through his nose and shook his head. “Nah, Liv… She was just begging for forgiveness after exceeding her lunch break…came back almost a half hour late, didn’t you?” His lip curled at one corner when your mouth dropped open, “Don’t let it happen again or I’m gonna have to write you up, peach.” Jake turned on his heel, stalking to the office, and left you speechless, gawking at his back as he disappeared through the doorway.

After a few minutes, Josh appeared at your side as you were straightening a shelf of CDs. “Hey, I’m heading out. Just wanted to say bye.” He pressed his palm to your back with a warm smile and you weren’t oblivious to the amount of touches he’d indulged in throughout the day…but you weren’t complaining either.

“Oh. Well I guess I’ll see you Sunday?” Your attention was torn away from him when you caught Olivia out of your peripheral vision, staring daggers at you before slipping behind the counter to poke her head into the office. You released a sigh and returned Josh’s smile. “I hope you have a better Friday night than I’m about to have.” Your eyes rolled on their own as her giggle echoed through the store.

He glanced toward the counter for a brief second, “It won’t be that bad. Jake and Olivia have done the flirting thing since she started here almost two years ago.” Josh patted your shoulder with a sympathetic expression. “I know how annoying they get but I guess I can’t really imagine how you feel about it… Just- It’s never been more than just flirting, y’know? If he wanted Liv, he’d have her…but he wants you.” His hand slid down your arm, holding onto your fingers for a moment before he flashed his signature smile and went on his way.

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Time felt like it was moving in slow motion. It was surprisingly slow for a Friday night and closing couldn’t come fast enough. Jake had been in the office since his twin left, going over payroll and catching up on paperwork, while Olivia would pop her head in every few minutes, or call his name from across the store in her loud, grating voice. You’d tried to ignore it, busy yourself with senseless tasks that didn’t even need done, but your patience was wearing thinner by the second. When he had finally decided to come out of his cave, he found you wiping down the glass display of limited editions for the third time and purposely placed his palm flat against the glass. You straightened up with an angry sigh, “Are you serious, Jake? Grow up.” You knew he was doing it to get a rise out of you, and normally you may have laughed or at least indulged in the playful banter that would’ve resulted, but you slammed the bottle of cleaner down on the counter and tossed the rag before walking away from him.

His brows raised in confusion, “Woah…Y/N, hey.” He was jogging to catch up with your long strides, reaching out to grab your hips. You couldn’t deny that you were growing irritable and Jake had definitely taken notice by the way you pushed his hands from you and glared at him, “Let’s take a walk, peach.” He carefully placed a hand on your shoulder as he led you towards the back hallway before calling out to Olivia, “Liv, we’re gonna grab some shit to restock…We’ll be right back.” He ignored whatever response she tried to give as he pushed you into the storage room and closed the door behind him. “What’s your goddamn problem?” His voice was stern, but you couldn’t be bothered to care.

“I don’t have a problem, can I get back to work?” You kept your tone short and clipped as you rolled your eyes and reached past him for the doorknob.

He leaned back against the door, putting his body weight on it so you couldn’t pull it open. “Don’t fucking lie to me. Why are you in a pissy mood?” He released a sigh and softened his voice, trying his best to tread lightly and keep you calm, “Peach, did I do something wrong?”

You watched his shoulders slump a bit and took a deep breath to center yourself. “No, Jake, you- It’s just been a long day and time is dragging…I’m exhausted, hun.” You grabbed his wrists, pulling him away from the door and towards you. “Sorry for being cranky…”

“Why are your hands shaking?” He stared at your grip on his arms before looking at your face, waiting for an answer.

Releasing him, you studied your hands for a moment and shook them out. The nausea rolling through your stomach made it obvious that you needed to eat, but you wouldn’t tell Jake that you’d skipped an actual lunch because of him. “Probably just too much caffeine today…I’m fine, babe, really.” You could tell that he wasn’t quite buying it, but you didn’t have the energy to argue with him. Stepping closer, you wrapped your arms around his midsection and flashed him a sweet smile, “Tell you what… Drop it and… I will give you a pass for one storage room quickie, available to you at a later date of your choosing.”

His lips stretched into a grin as he returned your embrace with a genuine laugh, his hands sneaking down to squeeze your ass. “Why can’t I have it today?” He began kissing along your jaw, trailing down your throat.

You giggled at the way his lips tickled your skin. “Haven’t you had enough of me today?” You pulled at his shirt as his lips continued their exploration, sucking at your neck. “Jake…” You gasped when he bared his teeth to softly bite your skin.

He spoke between kisses, slowly chipping away at your resolve. “Never enough, peach… C’mon. It’s slow… We got fifteen minutes to spare.” His rasped voice was enticing and you allowed him to draw you in as his hands slid beneath your shirt to cup your bare breasts.

“You think fifteen minutes is enough time to-.” A loud knocking on the door cut you off, making you jump.

Even muffled through the door, Olivia’s annoying voice still wiggled its way under your skin as she twisted at the doorknob. “Jake? Why is the door locked? I need help out here!” Jake dropped his hands with a sharp huff when you broke away from him to grab a stack of CDs from a shelf, as to not look suspicious. He ripped the door open and glared at her, waiting for an explanation. “I need- or I can’t find…umm…” She was flustered by the way he was staring at her, obviously never having been on the receiving end of your boss’s bad attitude.

He wasn’t playing into her usual ruse this time, clearly displeased with being interrupted. “I told you we’d be back in a minute, what was so important that it couldn’t wait, Olivia?” He watched her repeatedly open and close her mouth, searching for any kind of excuse she could conjure, but she remained silent, staring at him like a lost child. “Right… Excuse me.” He moved by her to exit the storage room without another word.

She gazed after him in shock before turning her attention on you. “What the hell… What did you say to him?” Shaking your head with a scoff, you pushed past her to exit the room with the stack of albums, but she followed closely behind you as her tone grew more accusatory. “You’ve been jealous of the relationship Jake and I have since you started here, Y/N. So what? You sneak him away to bribe him with sex or something? God…you’re such a desperate-.”

You stopped dead in your tracks and turned to face her as you dropped the CDs to the front counter. “Olivia, you better fucking watch what you say next…” You’re sure there was steam coming out of your ears because you could feel your face getting hot with anger. “I don’t need to throw myself at Jake for attention, honey… So who’s really the desperate one?” You stepped closer to her, silently challenging her to finish her thought.

Jake was inserting himself between the two of you before she could reply. “Both of you cut it the fuck out… Y/N, go sit in the office until you’ve calmed down.” He gave you a pointed look and nodded toward the office door while Olivia smiled smugly from behind him.

You could feel your blood begin to boil. “Are you joking? No. You’re not sending me off for a timeout, I haven’t fucking done anything wrong!” Picking up the stack of CDs, you spun around to walk away and stock them but Jake caught your arm. You ripped out of his grasp and met him with a threatening scowl.

“What…is going on?” Josh walked out of the back hallway and right into the building tension between his twin, you and Olivia. “It’s been two hours… What happened between when I left and now?”

Jake broke the staredown first, his eyes leaving yours to look at his brother. “I’ve got it handled, don’t worry about it. What are you doing here?”

Josh’s eyes flicked between you and Jake, trying to decipher what was going on, as he held up a takeout box. “I, uhhh. I went to Slice House to grab dinner and wanted to drop something off for-.”

“I’m not hungry right now, just put it in the fridge.” Jake’s words were rushed as he cut his twin off to watch you turn around and walk away from him. “We’re not fucking done.” He started after you, the aggravation radiating off of him.

“Oh… No, this is for Y/N.”

He froze in place to turn and face Josh, “Why are you bringing her dinner?” His possessive nature was coming out full force as he clenched his jaw and waited for an answer. You were standing a few feet away, half turned to them as you placed the albums on a shelf, but you were listening to their exchange.

“Why are you being a dickhead, dude?” Josh shook his head with a laugh, rubbing his hand down his face. “She hasn’t eaten anything all day and if she starves to death, there goes our best employee.” He looked at you with a smile when Olivia scoffed and opened his mouth to speak, but Jake beat him to it.

“What do you mean she hasn’t eaten anything?” He turned back to you, his frustration slowly dissipating and replaced by something else. “Why haven’t you ate?” He took a few strides to close the distance between you and grabbed your wrists, holding them up in his hands. “That’s why you’re shaking… Are you fucking- Why didn’t you eat a lunch?”

You almost melted at his concern, but the accusatory tone in his inquiry made you pull your arms from his grasp. “God, Jake. I don’t know… Can’t really remember what I was doing on my lunch break. Must not have been too important for me to have forgotten so soon.” You knew you were being harsh, but you weren’t in the mood to deal with anything anymore. Especially not his attitude.

His nostrils flared as he glared angrily at you, his expression was dark but he almost looked hurt. Jake bit his lips together, closing his eyes for a moment, and drew in a deep breath through his nose. When he opened his eyes again, his voice was quiet, soft even. “Take your food and go home, peach.” He held his hand up, shaking his head slightly, when you tried to argue. “Don’t. Clock out and go.” And with that, he walked away, trucking down the back hallway and slinking into the bathroom to slam the door shut.

Josh and Olivia were both staring at you, shocked expressions painting their faces, but you ignored them as you stomped to the office to clock out and grab your things. When you came out, moving straight for the front door to walk home, Josh caught up to you and caught your arm. “Y/N, wait… Your food.” He held the box up to you and you offered a soft smile and a mumbled ‘thanks’ as you took it pushed through the front door.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding…” A groan of frustration left your chest at the downpour you’d stepped into. It was like the sky opened up and dumped out every ounce of water the clouds held. What a day to walk. Taking a deep breath, you took a step out from the ripped and disheveled awning above the record store door, but a pair of arms were reaching out to yank you back into Highway Tunes. Turning in his hold, you were met by the fluff of curls and big brown eyes. “Josh, what are-.”

“I’m not letting you walk home in the rain. My car is out back, I’ll drop you off.” He was already walking away, not even stopping to check that you were following. Crossing through the backdoor, Josh placed a hand on your back and led you to his car, ushering you into the passenger seat, before rushing to climb into his own side. “Hasn’t rained like this in months…” He was shaking his hair out as he started the engine and put the car in reverse to back out of the space, gripping your headrest to look out the rear window, “Where do you live, sweetheart?” He pulled out of the small parking lot and drove towards the main road as he waited for you to give him directions.

You were staring out the window, watching the rain patter into puddles along the street, entirely oblivious to Josh’s voice. It wasn’t until he stretched his arm across the center console to carefully squeeze your thigh and give it a shake to get your attention that you finally looked at him. “Huh? I’m sorry… Did you say something?”

His hand lingered on your leg for a few moments before he pulled away and rested it on the shifter. “You gotta tell me where you live or you’re coming back to my place, YN.” He joked with a gentle chuckle as he glanced at you.

His laugh made you smile, instantly lifting your foul mood. “Oh. Uhh, if you make a left up here, on 16th, and go for about four blocks, I’ll let you know when we get to my building.” The drive was mostly quiet, save for the music playing on the radio, until he pulled the car up to your apartment building. You dug your keys from your bag as he put the car in park. “Thanks for the ride, Josh…and for the food. You really didn’t have to do that, but I appreciate it.”

“It’s not a big deal,” He waved you off, turning his body to face you, as he pointed to his own food in the backseat. “I was picking something up for myself and wondered if you ever got the chance to try the Drunken Italian… So I grabbed you a slice.” When you looked down at the takeout box in your lap, too large to hold just one slice of pizza, you raised an eyebrow at him. “What? I got you a classic pepperoni and a plain slice too. Wasn’t sure what you liked.” He shrugged sheepishly, his cheeks growing red.

You grasped the door handle and paused before you opened it. “Hey… You wanna come up and hangout for a bit? Eat, watch a movie or something? Bell’s at work until eight and I kind of just don’t wanna be alone.” He bit down on his lip for a moment and you expected him to decline at that point, but to your surprise, he asked where he should park his car. “Oh, just go down that side street and there’s parking right on the side of the building.” Once he had the car tucked into a spot, you both hopped out and headed inside. Josh kicked his shoes off beside yours and followed you into the kitchen as you flicked the light on. “I’m gonna go change real quick, make yourself at home, boss… Sam surely does.” Stalking into your bedroom, you grabbed some comfy clothes and slipped into the bathroom for a speedy body shower.

Josh was still in the kitchen when you came back, leaning against the countertop while he scrolled on his phone. He looked up when he heard you, his gaze lingering on your smooth legs, clad in a pair of old boxers, for a bit before they traveled up to see the faded Highway Tunes t-shirt that you took from his twin’s closet. “Where’d you get that? I haven’t seen that design in like…seven years.” He came closer, pinching the fabric between his fingers to examine the logo.

“Uhh. It’s actually Jake’s.” You looked down at the shirt back at him, “He let me borrow it and I just haven’t given it back yet… It’s- I don’t know. I just like it, I guess.” You watched as he dropped his hand and took a couple steps back and opted for a subject change. “You want something to drink? Bellamy keeps beer. Or we have water or probably some coke or-.”

“Water is fine, sweetheart.” He picked the boxes up from the counter after you grabbed a couple bottles from the fridge and followed you into the living room.

You sat down on the couch and gestured for him to sit as well, leaving a decent bit of distance between the two of you, as you lifted the remote to turn the tv on. “What do you wanna watch?” You turned to look at him after opening netflix.

He was already digging into his pizza, eyes wide and mouth full as he looked back at you, “Sorry…” He held a hand over his mouth as he finished chewing, “Whatever you want, Y/N. I’ll watch anything.”

You giggled at him, beginning to love the way his cheeks flushed when he got a little embarrassed. Shaking your head softly, your focus went back to the tv as you scrolled through the options. After a minute or so, your attention caught on a title, “Oh my god! They have Pretty In Pink on here!” You didn’t wait for Josh to react before you were clicking on the movie to start it. “You don’t mind, do you? It’s one of my favorites…” You were poking your lip out at him and pairing it with pleading eyes.

“No. No, go ahead. I’ve never seen it.” He was grinning with amusement at your excitement. “This is the one that you said had the record store in it, right?” Josh took another bite of his pizza, studying your face, as you sat back on the couch and opened your own box.

“Yeah. Trax! I swear, you’ll know exactly what I mean when you see it.” You settled in as the movie began and it wasn’t long before the takeout boxes were empty, discarded to the coffee table, and you were tucked under the throw blanket, quoting the scenes and offering unnecessary explanations to Josh. “Hey, Benny… I hope they shrivel up and fall off…” You glanced at him as you finished the quote and found his soft eyes already on you, a warm smile on his lips. “Sorry. God, I’m sorry.” You could feel the blush covering your cheeks as you buried your head in your hands. “It’s a bad habit… Bellamy always yells at me for quoting through movies.”

His hand curled gently around your wrist to pull one of your hands away so he could see your face. “Don’t apologize. I think it might be one of my new favorite things about you.” A quiet laugh escaped him as he released your arm. “I don’t think you realize that you’re doing it. It- it’s like a subconscious thing.” When you tilted your head, pinching your brows in question, he elaborated on his thought. “You don’t always say the lines out loud. Most of the time, you just mouth them to yourself…but every so often, it’ll slip out and you kind of giggle through it, so I’d assume those are your favorite parts.” He leaned forward to grab his water from the table, turning his attention back to the movie.

You stared at him for a moment, wondering if he’d been watching you the whole time. “Josh, did you-.” Your phone began to ring from where it sat on the coffee table, cutting you off. You stared at the illuminated screen, Jake’s name in bold letters at the top, and allowed it to go to voicemail.

“You gonna pick it up?” Josh asked when a second call came in and you shook your head, waiting for the screen to go black again. “He’s gonna be pissed if you don’t answer him, Y/N.” You remained silent as the phone lit up once more, with a text message this time. “Look… I know he can be a little hotheaded, but-.”

Leaning forward, you flipped the phone face down and sat back again before pointing to the television. “Wait! This is my favorite part!” Iona cranks the volume on the stereo as Try a Little Tenderness begins to play. “Watch, hun! It’s the best, I promise.” Your face lifted into a grin as you reached over and grabbed Josh’s arm to make sure he was paying attention.

He placed his hand over yours, sending a flare of warmth through your body. “I’m watching, sweetheart…” And he was. But his eyes weren’t on the TV.

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Josh POV

It was like her smile grew tenfold when the scene started. You couldn’t look at the TV, despite her request. All of your focus was on the white hot feeling of her skin on yours, unlike anything you’d ever felt from a single touch. She sang through the scene, bouncing about from where she sat, and you couldn’t take your eyes off of her; her hair was bundled into a bun at the base of her neck. Loose tendrils, damp from her shower, had fallen free and hung around her face. She smelled like jasmine and…vanilla? No. Jasmine and coconuts. You wondered if the boxers she was wearing were from an old boyfriend or maybe they were her dad’s? The faded logo on her t-shirt caught your attention. Did she know that shirt belonged to Ivy? Did Jake tell her that when he gave it to her?

She snapped her head towards you, her eyes shining as she crooned, “…Squeeze her…don’t tease her…never leave her…” She was laughing wildly, her grasp on your arm tightening the harder she sang and you started laughing with her. When the song finally ended, she was breathless, her body slumping back against the couch and falling towards you.

You gave her a few moments to catch her breath, looking down at where her head just barely laid on your shoulder. “Y’know…this might be my favorite movie too, Y/N.” Your heart felt like it stopped when she looked up at you with a shy smile, her cheeks the sweetest shade of pink, and let out a childlike giggle. “God, you’re beautiful…” The thought slipped out before you could stop it and you worried that maybe you’d ruined the moment.

Her grin stretched as she relaxed into you, “I think you’re more beautiful, boss.” The sound of the front door opening stole her attention. “Bellamy’s home. She’s gonna be excited to meet you…” Her voice oozed with sarcasm, causing you to raise your eyebrow in question, and she sat up straight just as her friend was coming in, whispering quietly, “Jake made…quite the first impression. Umm…just don’t take it personally, okay?” You gave a short nod before she greeted the other girl. “Hey, Bell. How was work, babe?”

She ignored Y/N’s question and looked directly at you, her lips pursed, “Are you the other one?” Her arms were crossed over her chest as she waited for an answer and you took a moment to study her. She was exactly how you’d pictured, given how much your little brother raved about her.

“I’m assuming you mean Jake’s counterpart? The handsome twin? The smart one?” You joked, hoping to earn a laugh or at least a smile from her. “I’m Josh.” You held a hand out to her for a friendly shake, but she shook her head. Sammy did say she was a spitfire.

Y/N spoke up from beside you, “Don’t be a dick, B. Give him a chance… it’s not fair to lump him with Jake.” She leaned over, bumping you with her shoulder, “Josh is an angel.”

“An angel, huh? So…what does that make Jake, sweet pea?” Before she could answer her friend, there was a knock on the door that caused the two girls to share a questioning look. Bellamy turned on her heel to stalk to the door and pull it open. “Speak of the devil…”

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You watched in slow motion as he pushed through the door and past Bellamy, despite her protests. “What? You can’t answer a fucking text? A phone call?” He was mad, that much was clear, and the store shouldn’t have been closed for another half hour, so you were sure the shock on your face was evident.

“What the hell are you doing here, Jake?” You tossed the blanket from your legs and stood up from the couch to face him. Bellamy was behind him, waiting for a sign to toss him out of the apartment, while Josh remained silent in his seat, watching the scene unfold.

“Do you see how it’s fucking storming out there?” He pointed towards the balcony where the pounding rain was only visible between flashes of lightning, “I didn’t know if you made it home and you wouldn’t pick up the goddamn phone! I was worried, Y/N…” He looked at his twin then, anger radiating off of him, “No surprise…you’re cuddled up with my fucking brother.”

Josh stood up then, placing himself between you and Jake, “We watched a movie and ate pizza, Jake. As friends.” He gestured between the two of you to get his point across, “That’s all we are, man. We’re just…friends.” He gave you a small, sympathetic smile before turning back to his twin, “If you don’t start treating her differently, you’ll end up a lot less than that.” Scooping up his keys and phone from the coffee table, he offered you a soft goodbye and pushed past his brother, only stopping to look at your best friend, “It was nice to meet you, Bellamy.” He paused as he was stepping through the front door and you could tell that he was fighting on whether to say what he wanted to or keep it to himself. The moment stretched on for an eternity before he finally spoke, avoiding your eyes entirely, as he looked at Jake, “She chose you, Jake… Try being fucking grateful.”

You watched him go, closing the door behind him, and began cleaning up the mess from the table after shutting the TV off. When you started towards the kitchen, Jake stepped in front of you and placed his hands on your shoulders, “Can you talk to me for a minute, please?” He followed you as you moved around him and threw the empty boxes into the garbage can. “Peach, please…” He gently grabbed your arm as you tried to silently exit the kitchen.

Calmly peeling yourself from his hold, you kept your head down. “I don’t have the energy to fight with you, Jake. I’m going to bed.” You could feel his presence behind you as he followed you into your room and closed the door. Finally turning to face him, you caught the flash of guilt in his eyes as he stood silently and waited for you to kick him out or tell him to stay. “He was right, yanno?.... I chose you, Jake.” He opened his mouth but you held your hand up to stop him, “If you don’t have trust in me, this won’t work. If I can’t have friends without you accusing me of something, this won’t work. Do you get that?” You plopped down on your bed with a sigh, “I’m not gonna keep having the same fights with you… I can’t.”

“I’m fucking trying, peach.” He came across the room to sit beside you, taking your hand in his. “Trust is hard for me. I told you-.”

“But you won’t tell me why!” You pulled your hand away and dragged them both down your face, “Help me understand, Jake! Let me see your point of view, because I won’t keep fucking doing this shit!” You breathed out a steady sigh and stood up to pull the duvet back and climb into bed.

You assumed he would leave when he stood up from the bed, but you were surprised when he stripped down to his boxers and flipped the light off before crawling in beside you and pulling the blanket over the both of you. He didn’t attempt to cuddle up to you, just laid on his back, staring at the ceiling in the darkness. You laid on your side, facing him, just barely able to make out his features through the flashes of lightning that would illuminate the room every few moments. The silence was growing and taking all the air in the room, it was becoming suffocating, you felt like you were losing your mind. Then came Jake’s voice; soft, sad, barely a whisper, “I was gonna give up everything for her… I really loved her, Y/N.” The tone of his voice broke your heart and you reached out carefully, placing your hand on the center of his chest to encourage him to continue. His body tensed beneath your touch, but he took a deep breath and slowly began to relax, “She loved me too. For a while, at least… I think deep down, I knew that she was checked out towards the end, but I was in denial.” He paused when his voice started to shake and you rolled closer to him.

“Take your time, baby. I’m here.” You held him close, pressing your lips to his shoulder. “Do you wanna start from the beginning?”

He shook his head, chewing at the skin on his lip. “The beginning isn’t important… We were together for two years before she wanted to move to New York. I was gonna do it. Drop my life, my family, everything, just to fucking follow her.”

“What made you stay?”

“When Josh and I decided that we weren’t going to college, mom and dad chose to pass the store to us. They loved the business, but after 20 years of running it and raising a family, they wanted a break.” A fleeting smile ghosted across his lips, “Josh didn’t wanna do it by himself, Sam was still in high school and had his mind set on CCA after graduation… I wanted to go with Ivy, but Highway Tunes was- is my life. It meant everything to my parents but it meant just as much to me. It’s where we grew up… Spent more time there than at our house. I guess my mistake was thinking that she would understand.”

You sat up in the bed, crossing your legs beneath you and looking down at him, “So, she left for New York without you?” You were trying to put the pieces together.

Jake placed his hand on your thigh, his thumb mindlessly grazing over your skin. “She stayed here with me. But she didn’t stay for me… She stayed for herself. She didn’t have to work, didn’t have to pay bills. I took care of her, I took care of everything… I gave her a life that most people would be grateful to have. And I thought she was.”

“What did she do, Jake?” You pulled your knees up, hugging them to your chest as a wave of sickness rolled through your body at the thought of what she could’ve done to hurt him.

He sat up as well and, despite the dark room, you could feel his eyes on you as he reached out and took your hand in one of his. “Peach, you…make me happy in a way that I haven’t felt…in a really long time.” He brought your hand to his mouth, holding your knuckles against his lips for a moment and you felt your stomach flip as tears began to sting your eyes. “I’m really fucked up, Y/N.” His voice cracked but you let him continue, “That last year was when things started to get bad…I uhhh- I started to notice a change when she would ask me for money to get groceries for the apartment and I’d come home to find the cabinets empty. When I would ask her about it, she would make me feel fucking crazy…Tell me that she never said she was getting groceries or that I was working too much, so the exhaustion must have confused me.”

“Jake…” You wanted to tell him to stop, that he didn’t have to talk about it anymore, but he didn’t give you the opportunity.

“That shirt you’re wearing right now- do you remember when I told you she was wearing it the last morning I woke up with her?” You nodded your head and, even though he couldn’t see your face, he kept talking, “I was supposed to work the double that day but I got hit with a bad cold, had Josh come in and close for me… When I got home, Ivy was in the shower and I thought it would be nice to join her. We hadn’t really had time for intimacy, I guess. But she wasn’t alone in there.” Jake released a humorless laugh, “She wasn’t even remorseful…I think that’s what hurt the most. Hurt more than her telling me I was nothing, that I didn’t deserve her. I asked her, What did I do wrong? I love you, I gave you everything… and she laughed in my face and said, ‘You gave me everything. Why would I leave?’” He was holding your hand, tracing his fingers over your palm as his voice grew quieter, “After she admitted that she hadn’t loved me in a while, she was using me, I left. Flew to Michigan to stay with my parents for a few days and clear my head. When I came back, she was gone… Cleaned most of the apartment out, left a note. I didn’t read it, I couldn’t. I just threw it in the trash and moved on.” He fell silent after concluding, his index finger still traveling over your hand.

You sat, unmoving, unsure of what to say or if you should even say anything, until a wet drop landed on your palm and you felt your heart stop. “Baby, no…” You sat up on your knees and flung your arms around him, holding him tight to your chest. “Jake, I’m so sorry. I-.” His body shook in your hold and your own tears started to fall. Seeing his vulnerability, under the circumstances, filled you with sorrow.

He wrapped his arms around your torso, clinging to your body as he moved to lay down, pulling you with him. “It fucking hurt, Y/N… It hurt for so long…”

You held his face, swiping at his wet cheeks as you sniffled, “She’ll never hurt you again, Jake. I promise. Nobody will…”

🤍Taglist🤍

@jakekiszkasbuttsweat @ieatedasammy @twistedmelodies @dropdeadalyx31 @ageofbajabule @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @ignite-my-fire @becinabubblegvf @literal-dead-leaf @sanguinebats @myleftsock @laneygvf @writingcold @sinarainbows @lipstickitty @giraffehippy @jakesmustache @gracev0609 @gretavansara @profitofthedune @gvfmarge @brookekiszkaa @earthgrlsreasy @welllauragvf @takenbythemadness @swim2shore @violet-hayes @stardustvanfleet @gretavangroupie @jordie-gvf

#cassie’s fic recommendation #jake kiszka gvf #jake x reader #josh kiszka gvf #josh x reader #jake gvf #josh gvf #jake kiszka series #josh kiszka series #greta van fleet fluff #greta van fleet fan fiction

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anthemofgvf · 2 years ago

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Endless Summer: Josh Kiszka x Reader Fanfiction

Part Two

description: you and sammy have been best friends since you were kids, and being around his family was the norm your entire life. when invited to a trip to their family lake house during the summer, you find yourself spending more time with his brother than your best friend. and, one thing has been clear your entire friendship: brothers are off limits.

warnings for this series: alcohol and marijuana usage, explicit content (18+, minors dni), angst, swearing

word count: 7k

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You squinted one eye open the next day as you heard your door squeak. You lifted your head just enough to see Sam creeping into your bedroom. When he noticed you were alert and awake, he gave you a soft smile, and made his way over to your bed without caring about his steps being too loud on the creaking wood floors.

He crawled into bed with you, resting his back on the headboard and inviting you into his arms as one laid above your head. You moved yourself over to his body and rested your head on his bare chest, humming in delight as you made yourself comfortable and shutting your eyes.

“Morning.” He croaked at you.

You titled your head up and met his eyes, then chose to rest back down as you felt your neck growing tired from craning it.

“Good morning to you, too, sunshine.” You smirked at your comment, feeling Sam’s chest rise as he huffed out a laugh.

“What was it like sleeping in here?”

“Blissful, until you decided to wake me up.” You shook your head against his chest. “What time is it?”

“Nearly nine.” He shifted his head towards the round clock that sat on the wall of the room. “Bright and early.”

“Too early,” you groaned, “are the boys awake?”

“I think Josh is, but I’m not sure. Didn’t check.” He shrugged.

You moved yourself off of his chest and chose to rest your back on the headboard as he did, sighing deeply as you let your eyes get used to the brightly-lit room.

“Do we have anything planned for the day?” You turned your head to him.

“I know they have something planned, but they won’t tell me because they want it to be a surprise for you.” He rolled his eyes and finally met your gaze.

“They know better not to tell you because you’d tell me anyways.” You gave him a playful smirk, watching as he grew slightly irritated at your truth. “You’re not good at keeping secrets.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever it is, I hope it’s good.”

You nodded and let your eyes rest on the mirror in front of you, watching through it as Sam picked himself off the bed and stood in silence, like he was waiting for you to turn your attention back to him.

“Breakfast?”

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You all grabbed food at a nearby diner, agreeing to go shopping to stock up on groceries to keep your going out to a minimum. Once you all arrived back home after eating, you entered the lake house again.

Jake mentioned that you would need your swimsuit for the day, but it wasn't necessarily required. You decided to throw it on underneath your clothing just in case and met the boys downstairs where they seemed to have gathered in a small circle and chatting casually.

You raised your eyebrows at them and waited for their attention to turn towards you, to which Josh clasped his hands together and motioned everyone to follow him. He grabbed a small, light-weight cooler on the way out with a few things he packed into it from the newly stocked fridge and pantry.

"Are you boys gonna tell us what we're doing?" You followed the twins and Sam down the familiar trail to the lake, except taking a slightly alternative route.

"You'll see when we get there." Jake flipped his head back to you, giving you a suspicious smile that only meant they were up to no good.

You looked up at Sam, who seemed to be set off and in an aggravated mood. He must've been told what you all were doing, or he simply figured it out on his own. You chose to keep your thoughts to yourself and look back forward and continued down the path.

As you four made it to the bottom of the trail, two kayaks laid at the bottom with four large paddles sitting inside of them. Jake and Josh must've set them up earlier when you and Sam were together in the morning, or when you two were occupied with changing.

"You didn't tell me what we were doing because we were going to go kayaking?" Sam huffed with a slight groan, popping his hip out with folded arms.

"Well, if we would've told you, we wouldn't have been able to drag you down here." Jake shrugged with a sly smirk slapped across his face, seemingly pleased that he was upsetting his brother. "It won't be like last time, I promise. Don't be a prick, Sam."

"Wait, why are you upset? I thought you liked kayaking?" You furrowed your brows, making your way to the kayak that was directly in front of you.

"That was until they pushed me into the water, and I had to get a new phone because my old one broke. And I lost my wallet." He spat, looking over to the twins who were failing to hide their laughter behind their ducked heads.

"God, it was hilarious, y/n. Sam was trying to find his wallet for like hours, and he eventually gave up. He ended up tugging his jeans on a few branches and came out of the lake a mess." Josh said in between laughs.

"It's not funny, man. Told you guys I didn't want to go kayaking with you again after that. Was fucking miserable all day. You know I nearly got an infection because I cut myself so deep?" He spat, challenging his brothers by taking a few steps closer.

"If you think we're going to do it again you're more than free to go sit in the house until we get back." Jake shrugged, flashing his eyes at you before meeting Sam's.

Sam turned his head over his shoulder, noticing you were eager to step into the kayak and waiting for him to join you.

Sam rolled his eyes, exhaling with a deep sigh and saying, "Alright, but I'm going with y/n. If any of you try something stupid, I'm pulling you down under with me." He pointed in their faces, giving them one more look of anger as he took harsh steps towards the back of yours and his's kayak,

Josh took his seat whilst you settled into yours, letting Sam push your kayak into the water and Jake pushing theirs. After getting deep enough into the water, Sam hopped in and grabbed his paddle to begin rowing.

While you helped paddle through the lake, you watched as Josh commanded Jake with quiet directions, snapping photos on his camera of the scenery around you. You had forgotten about how gorgeous the lake was: trees lining the deep blue, yet murky waters, branches that hung too close for comfort, and sparce leaves that rested on the surface of the lake.

Jake had begun talking about where you all were headed off to, explaining that there was a small creek ahead and that that would be your final destination. You listened to the twins tell you a story or two about a fond memory of swimming there, because as kids they always ran off and did things on their own. Sam stayed quiet for the most part, only exhaling quiet sighs as Josh dragged on a story about him and Jake.

Once you all made it to the creek, you and Sam "parked" your kayak off to the side by a few sturdy rocks and tying it to the bark of the tree that rested behind the rocks, letting you four stop for a few hours.

Josh had already cracked a bottle open of a Coors Light beer, sipping it gingerly as he continued to sit in the kayak, not stepping out of it just yet and letting it float in the calm waters. Jake had already made his way under a shaded area nearby, grabbing a sandwich from the cooler and sitting on the rocks as he took a few bites.

"Wasn't so bad, was it?" You stepped over to Sam, who cautiously grabbed a beer from the cooler that sat in front of Josh.

"That's because I warned them not to try anything stupid." He popped the tab of the can, letting the fizz simmer before taking a drink. "You were barely any help."

"Oh, I'm sorry my arms got a little tired." You titled your head to the side, glaring at him with a hint of playfulness. "I'll steer the entire way back if you'd like."

"You might make us crash." He bit back a smirk, dodging your flying hand with a chuckle.

Josh stepped out, pulling the kayak up the rocks until he felt comfortable it would stay, and joined you and Sam's conversation.

"You know, I don't mind taking y/n if you feel as though her paddling was unsatisfactory." He flicked his eyes at you with a warm smile before looking back up at his brother.

"Yeah, and then have Jake in my kayak? That's just a disaster waiting to happen." Sam said as he rested his hands on his hips.

"Not going to push you into the water, Sam." Jake spoke up from his seated position, taking another bite of his sandwich.

"I'll make you a deal, then. If Jake pushes you in the water, tips the kayak - any of that, you can push me in while I'm fully clothed. I can even have my phone in my pocket if it makes you feel better." He cocked his head with raised brows, waiting for his brother's response.

Sam looked over at Jake, who seemed to have spaced off by looking at something in the near distance, finishing his sandwich and setting his trash next to him as he sprawled his hands out behind him and leaning on them for balance.

"Why do you want y/n in your kayak so badly?" Sam furrowed his brows, looking back to Josh who had a confused look on his face.

Before you were able to speak to express your feelings about Sam's unnecessary attitude, Josh spoke.

"I was just offering because you were complaining about her not being helpful, Sam. She's a friend to us all, not just you."

Sam had always been protective over you, especially when it came to his older brothers. It spurred from jealously of never having something that his brother's didn't, and you were something that was his own. It wasn't a possessive thing in any means, it was a thing of being his own personal best friend. Although he did have Danny, he didn't know him for nearly as long as you two have known each other, and your guys' bond was inseparable just like Jake and Josh's. So, yeah, from time to time he did get jealous when you found one of Josh's jokes funnier than his or decided that you liked one of his older brother idea's better, but that came from him always feeling like he was competing with the twins. He never wanted to make you feel like he thought he owned you, but he did want it to feel like you preferred him over his siblings. He just didn't want to lose another thing to his brothers.

Being the youngest sibling didn't help always feeling like he got the short end of the stick, so when you and him became friends, he finally had something, someone that wasn't a product of his brothers. You were his best friend, and although you eventually became friends with Josh and Jake, you always chose him at the end of the day.

Sam huffed, flicking his eyes back over to Jake before starting to speak. "Fine, yeah. I'll go with Jake back." He threw his hand up and walked away with a tight fist, slumping into the rocks and drinking from his can.

You looked at Josh with wide eyes, seeing that he had already shrugged the situation off.

"I'm sorry-"

"Don't be," he placed his hand on your shoulder, "you know how he is. He'll shape up once we get back."

You nodded, turning your head in Sam's direction, who still had a sour expression on his face and averting his eyes from everyone as he stared at his feet.

"Did you guys push him last time you all were here?" You pressed your lips together.

"Yeah, two summers ago. Was our last time here before we went on tour again. He doesn't let us live it down." He chuckles, raising the lip of his bottle to his mouth.

"Did you apologize to him?"

"'Course we did. But you know Sam. Always holding a grudge." He shrugged with the bottle still at his mouth, taking another sip as he finished his sentence.

You were torn between continuing your conversation with Josh or joining Sam where he sat. You knew Sam always liked space when he was upset, but he also always appreciated your company, and you were able to easily pull him out of an upsetting mood whenever it called for it.

When Josh left you to sit beside Jake, you found yourself creeping over to Sam and sitting next to him with your eyes on the lake. He still had his head dipped down and caught in his own train of thought.

"Hey, you alright?" You spoke quietly, looking over to him.

"Fine." He said as he gave you a tight smile with his eyes still focused on the rocks. "Was just joking, by the way."

"I know you were." You nodded and placed a hand on his back.

Sam picked his head up, sharply inhaling as if the words he had to say were resting on his tongue, but he didn't know if he should speak. He turned his head to you, flicking between both of your eyes as you waited for him to say whatever he felt like he couldn't.

But you knew what he was upset about. It wasn't just the kayaking, which he eventually got over, it was about Josh. He knew you were close with his brothers, and that was fine, but it still bothered him. He felt as though if you ever got closer with them, you'd stop spending time with him and push him to the side. Because, as a matter of fact, that happened a lot to him when he was younger. You watched from the sidelines and would see his friends come and go and choose Jake and or Josh instead of him, or stop being friends with him all together for whatever reason. And you were one of the only people who never chose a side, and that's why you were so important to him.

"You know I love you, Sam. Right?" You let the corners of your lips rest into a smile, rubbing his back with affection.

"Yeah," he huffed a laugh, "I guess I was just being dramatic. I don't know, I was kind of set off already with the whole thing and when Josh said that it just pissed me off. I know he was just trying to be nice, but sometimes I just miss the actual intention behind things, ya know?" He swallowed, rubbing his lips together; a nervous tick he always did. He wasn't the best with his emotions, but when he was, he was fearful of whatever would come next or what would be said.

But you always knew what to say, thankfully because you've known him for so long.

"Yeah, I know. He was just trying to be helpful, despite him not knowing you were just messing with me. I think you owe him an apology, though." You watched as Sam cocked his brows at you. "Maybe not now, but you should at least do it after we get back."

Sam nodded, wrapping his arm around you and resting his head on top of yours. He squeezed you into his side and circled your back with his hand.

"Thanks." He muttered, raising his hand to your hair and massaging your scalp. "Sometimes I don't know how you deal with me."

"It's a thing called patience." You sighed.

You all went into the water for a bit, taking turns popping in and out of the lake and letting the sun soothe you into relaxation. It wasn't an extremely eventful day, but you didn't need much to be satisfied. You had your friends with you, and that was just enough.

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You hopped in Josh's kayak and let him push it into the lake, hopping in front and setting the cooler at the floor of the small boat. Jake and Sam followed shortly behind, but you and Josh had a small head-start.

You twisted your head back and realized Sam and Jake were actually far behind, more than you realized. You worked harder to paddle, probably because you didn't want to embarrass yourself in front of Josh.

"Do you think we should stop and wait for them?" You slowed your rowing and met Josh's eyes.

"Nah, they'll catch up." He titled his head up and motioned for you to continue.

You pressed your tongue to the roof of your mouth, hesitating to speak for a moment.

"Sam's feeling a little jealous." You admitted.

You heard Josh chuckle to himself. "When is he not?"

"Yeah, you're right." You shook your head as you laughed. "I just don't get it sometimes. I mean, we've known each other for so long and he still reverts to acting the same way he did when we were younger."

Josh clicked his tongue. "I'm not sure. He's just a jealous guy. Always has been, I suppose."

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You and Josh made it back to the lake house before his brothers did, and you both took the liberty of grabbing firewood for the firepit outside whilst waiting for their arrival.

You dusted your hands off on your shorts, taking a seat as Josh finished putting the last piece of fire in the pit.

With the sun just barely peaking its head over the grassy hills, the air became less aggressive and lightly sang through your hair and caving in to cool your body. The temperature change wasn’t by much, but it was enough to feel a difference.

Josh hopped in the seat next to you after pulling out one of the last bottles of beer in the small cooler, grabbing one in his other hand and lending it to you with a smile. You took it with gratitude, using the bottle opener and clicking off the metal lid with a loud “pop”.

“Shall we wait for them to get here to light the fire?” Josh looked over to you for approval. The way he asked you seemed like he was stating it rhetorically, but you still answered with a shake of your head.

“Sam isn’t the only pyromaniac in the Kiszka family.” Josh pointed his finger at you, causing you to giggle.

You took a sip from your bottle, waiting patiently for Josh to light the fire. He was blocking your view, standing directly in front of you and then turning around with a satisfied smile once he got the fire going with a few matches and newspaper.

He retook his seat next to you and rested his head on the back of it, fluttering his eyes shut and taking a deep breath.

"I'm sorry, again, about Sam earlier." You twisted your head and letting it rest on your shoulder.

Josh squinted one eye open and looked over to you, shaking his head with a smile.

"You don't have to apologize for him. You have no reason to be sorry." He gave you a shrug, lifting the lip of his bottle to his lips.

"Well, I just feel like someone should apologize. I don't know if he will, so." You pressed your lips together, watching as Josh returned to relaxing the back of his head on the chair, to which you followed and did the same.

Your ears tuned to the hushed sound of branches crunching under shoes, and quiet chatter floating through the air. You lifted your head to see Sam and Jake making their way up the trail with blank faces.

Jake ran off into the lake house, probably to go grab his guitar, and Sam stood in front of Josh with furrowed brows. Josh flicked his eyes at you, then to Sam, and quickly stood up from the seat with an "oh!".

"Was keeping your seat warm." He extended his arms towards the seat as Sammy hopped into the chair.

As Josh made the short walk over to the seat that became his, you decided to try your luck with talking to Sam again.

"I see you're completely dry. Jake didn't push you in?" You joked, letting your lips relax into a playful smirk.

Sam shook his head with an eyeroll, biting back a smile. "We didn't talk much on the way back."

"Probably because he didn't want to say the wrong thing. You look a bit tense."

His face was tight as if you insulted him, shaking his shoulders out and trying to prove to you that he hadn't let the situation earlier affect him still. His Adam's apple bobbed in his throat, averting his eyes from you and standing up to make his way to the cooler.

Jake came out with his guitar case and plopped into the open seat next to Josh, flicking the latches open and pulling the acoustic out with a soft grunt. He rested the base on his knees, his fingers laying lightly on the neck and searching between the three of you with a parted mouth.

"Any suggestions?" He asked. With no reply, he turned his direction to you. "Y/n?"

"Oh, I don't care. Anything you play is great." You felt your cheeks flush, and you shook your head and nursed your bottle by your lips.

"C'mon, I'll play whatever you want." He dragged out the syllables and rested his mouth in a smile.

You took a deep breath and clicked your tongue, searching the ground for an answer, but coming up with nothing. It's not that you were shy, it's just that nothing came to mind. There was always the pressure of not picking a good song, but you shared common music taste with the boys.

But an idea sprung into your head. "How about one of your songs? Haven't gotten the chance to hear you guys live yet."

"But we play our stuff-"

"No, c'mon, let's play something for her." Josh cut Jake off while throwing his hand out to the guitar. He gave you a comical smirk, followed with a wink.

"Well, if that's what you want." He shrugged, tilting his head up for a moment in thought before letting his fingers pluck the chords.

You watched as Josh nodded his head to the melody, seeing him flutter his eyes shut once he began singing the first note. His vocal cords exuded a beautiful orchestra as he sang the song you've familiarized yourself with: "You're the One".

Through your peripheral, you noticed Sam's eyes rested on you, seemingly waiting for you to turn your attention to him. You whipped your head to him with a smile.

"Do you feel any better?" You whispered as you leaned your head towards your friend.

"A bit, yeah," he let his mouth rest parted, "I'm sorry, by the way, for being a dick earlier."

You flashed a smile at him, placing your hand on the back of his. "It's okay. I know you're a little selfish with me sometimes."

He tilted his head up, exhaling a laugh before slowly returning his eyes to you. "Just don't want to lose you to my brother, that's all."

You opened your mouth to reassure him that that wouldn't happen, but he turned his hand over and held yours, speaking up before you had the chance.

"I know I won't. I just worry too much sometimes. And, and it wasn't like it was a big deal anyways. It was a fucking kayak ride." He shook his head while he pressed his lips together. "I just, well, it's still hard sometimes to see you spend time with my brother and not me. It's selfish, I know - I'm well aware." He sighed, looking over to his brothers before returning to you. "I don't even know what was wrong this morning. Guess I just needed someone to blame for how I felt, and Josh was the first person to test me."

You pressed your tongue into your cheek and squeezed his hand, nodding to acknowledge his words and how he felt. You always appreciated it when he would be so vulnerable like this, and it was vital for him to know that you were listening and cared about what he had to say.

"Can I be honest with you?" You said hesitantly.

He nodded and waited for you to continue.

"Don't get upset when I say this," you warned, to which he scrunched up his face in confusion, "I think sometimes you can kind of be an asshole. Like, y'know, with me wanting to hang out with your brothers for a bit. I know how you feel - I do, I just wish you'd take a step back and realize I'm not going anywhere. You don't have to be so protective over me because you think I'd stop being your friend if I spent more time with your brothers."

He tried to let the muscles in his face relax, exhaling deeply as his eyes scrunched shut. With his head tilted down, he collected his thoughts, and gave you a nod.

"Okay," was all he could say to you. You knew that was all you were going to get from him, because after all, he never liked admitting when he was in the wrong. He knew that you cared about your guy's friendship more than anything, but deep down, his gut told him a different story and that he should be cautious.

But he had no reason to be. Even if you had feelings for Josh, which you pushed deep into the back of your brain and heart, you wouldn't let that ruin your friendship with Sam. After all, he was the person that held you as you cried, the person you confided in, the person that would drop anything just to make sure you were okay.

Even when you two were in high school did it shock you how you were a main priority in his life. He usually came off to those around him as self-centered, but to his friends, he was beyond reliable. That's one of the reasons why you valued Sam so much; because even if his exterior said that he didn't care about others, it was far from the truth.

So, seeing him jealous time and time again was normal, and you grew to understand the motive behind his feelings. Even after all this time, you didn't fully grasp why he wouldn't just let some things go or be the bigger person. But, when remembering how he viewed you, it became easier to accept that that was the dynamic between you two, and it would never change. You were like his little sister, despite him being a month older than you. But he didn't consider his brothers in your extended family, it was more of if you were some sort of "long lost sister that was only related to him."

And in a strange way, it made sense. Especially considering you never saw the twins as family, but rather just as friends. But Sammy, Sammy was the brother you never had - the sibling you were never given. And that's why he was so protective over you.

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Once the fire finally died down and the night had seemed to come to an end, you all decided nonverbally to part ways and head back into the lake house.

As you brushed your teeth and got ready for bed, a few, quiet knocks tapped at your door. You probably wouldn’t have heard them if your sink was still running.

With a cocked brow, you walked over to your door, opening it and seeing Josh.

“Hey.” You titled your head to the side, looking at him quizzically.

“Hi,” he smiled at you sheepishly, “mind if I come in for a bit?”

You turned your head over to your bed, then meeting his eyes. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, I’m just not that tired. Preferred to bother you.” He nodded his head satisfactorily and pushed his way past you as he hopped onto your bed.

You huffed a laugh and returned to the sink in your bathroom as you began brushing through your hair.

"Your brothers weren't good enough options?" You huffed a laugh and flipped your hair over your shoulder once you made your way over to your bed.

He shrugged. "I get to see them all the time. You, on the other hand, not so much. Feel like we got a bit of catching up to do."

You nodded your head in agreement, sitting crisscross on the bed and facing towards the mirror. You noticed Josh fidgeting with his fingers in the mirror, keeping his head hung low and his eyes focused on his cuticles.

"Are you okay?" You turned your head to him, to which he immediately caught your gaze.

"Yeah, just a little bored. Usually just sit in my room for an hour, but I figured a little company would be nice." He gave you a single nod with a soft smile, returning his eyes to his fingers in a slow motion.

You pushed your tongue into your cheek, bouncing between asking him a question that you felt was too sensitive perhaps. Or, just flat-out stupid. But you knew Josh wasn't one to judge you or leave you feeling embarrassed for asking a question.

"Do you...do you get, or feel lonely sometimes?" You watched as he stopped picking at his nails, furrowing his brows together in thought and tilting his head up.

"Not really, no. I'm just a people person, I suppose. Although, I do like spending time by myself." He pointed at you before resuming picking at his nails. "Sometimes it sucks third or fourth wheeling on outings, but it's normal for me. I've become more comfortable with being alone." He met your eyes with a smile that told you that he was being truthful. That he didn't want you to worry about him.

"That's kind of sad." You looked at him with a frown, down turning your brows.

"I don't think so. Well, when you state it the way I just did, yeah it sounds sad," he chuckled to himself, "but I don't mind it." He gave you a reassuring smile, hesitating for a moment before he continued. "Do you?"

You laughed at the question, mainly because you could feel yourself getting uncomfortable with the height of vulnerability immediately rising. You never had an issue talking about emotions, let alone with Josh, but it wasn't something you liked thinking about.

You had your friends in college, and Sam and the twins, but that was pretty much it. Of course, family is always there, but there's some things you can't talk to family about that you can with your friends. You missed Sam more than anyone for the most part when he was gone, and it was the worst kind of feeling you'd get that rested in the pit of your stomach watching him leave Frankenmuth every time. It never got better, no matter how much time went on at an agonizingly slow pace.

And God did it hurt when Josh would leave. You'd even let your tears fall as you give them all hugs, and Josh would hold you in his arms a little longer because he knew that that's what you needed. You'd grasp onto that memory and feeling of being in his arms for as long as you could, until you couldn't remember, and it was just a distant memory that you oddly felt guilty about trying to recall, even though you shouldn't be ashamed of missing his touch.

"Sometimes, yeah. I've got a good number of friends in school, but I miss Sam a lot when he's gone." You watched as his face scrunched up. "And you and Jake, of course."

"Glad to know you don't forget about me when I'm gone." He rested his hand on your knee, rubbing his thumb up and down the bone.

You try to forget about him, but you know if you do, you'll feel worse when he comes back. You're practically guilt-ridden for missing Josh more than Sam sometimes. And that's one thing you'll never admit to anyone.

You two continued to talk about your schooling, and his upcoming tour and all the new songs they have recorded and ready to release. Watching his eyes light up as he tells you the premise of their album and what each song means to him with such passion made you realize what made you fall in love with him in the first place: how much he loves life and is beyond grateful for everything given to him. And how his eyes hold so much adoration, no matter where he looks or who he looks at. He's always wearing his heart on his sleeve and showing the next person the same appreciation as the last. It's one of the things you aspire to be like - more loving, that is.

But you don't try to let your emotions control you, especially because every time you look at Josh you just want to shove your lips on his and taste whatever stupid ChapStick he's wearing. And you've tricked yourself into believing that's selfish. Selfish because you know Sammy would be absolutely crushed that you did the one thing he told you not to do.

But you hadn't done anything wrong, at least not yet.

Then you realized why you hated talking to Josh sometimes. He brought out your emotions and easily unveiled the layers that hid your vulnerability and let them pour into his lap from your mouth. Okay, you didn't hate it, but you wished it wasn't so easy for you to open up to him. For him to make you feel like you were the only person that truly mattered.

And that was why you hated loving him. Because you couldn't. Because it was wrong. Because it was selfish of you to have feelings for someone that you shouldn't because Sammy had told you so long ago that that was the one thing, the one thing that he didn't want to happen in your friendship.

And it did, and it ate at you from the moment you woke up until you fell asleep. And sometimes, it invaded your dreams just to remind you how you should be ashamed.

And that was all you could think about when you and Josh talked. You tried keeping a bright smile on your face, nodding your head to show you were listening. But you were letting your thoughts travel through your ears instead of his words. It was the only time you didn't listen to Josh when he spoke.

"Do we have any plans for tomorrow?" You muttered as you tucked a stray hair behind your ear.

"Don't think so. Might go downtown or head to the beach at night. Jake and I just kind of decide what to do when we see each other in the morning."

"And leave Sam out of it?" You cocked your head to the side.

"He doesn't really care what we do. And, he never has any input. We always consider something if he brings it up, but he usually just tells us whatever we do is fine. Although, we are thinking about surprising him with going to one of his favorite restaurants tomorrow." He gestured with his hand as he spoke. "One of the only places in town with 'good vegan food'."

"I'd like that." You gave him a downturned smile.

"Did he convert you into a vegan?" His eyes widened, pretending to be shocked.

"That's one thing we don't have in common, Josh." You laughed at his face contorting back into a relaxed face of "relief".

"I'm glad some things don't change. Which, you didn't." He extended his pointer finger towards you.

"Is that a good thing?" You rested your hands on your knees and repositioned your body, still sitting crisscross.

"In your case, yeah. I think it is." He nodded, placing his hand on top of yours. "There hasn't been anything wrong with you to begin with." He circled the back of your hand with his thumb, holding your eyes. "Maybe not coming to any of our shows is where you went wrong."

You opened your mouth in defiance, still smiling, and Josh spoke before you had the chance.

"I'm sure you can make it up to me somehow. Like, I don't know, just a random thought, by coming on tour with us next year." He shrugged with a sly smirk, watching you as you rolled your eyes.

"I'll try, Josh. I think next year I'll finally be able to."

"Good! It's been long enough." He threw his hands up, keeping his mouth rested in a cheesy smile as you pushed his shoulder.

Josh let the laughter die down before he hopped out of your bed, letting his lips rest into a soft smile and saying goodnight. You returned the words and waited for him to close the door fully before relaxing under your covers.

You figured resting your eyes and letting your tired body sink into the mattress would lull you to sleep, but you couldn't help but wear your infamous downturned smile. It wasn't like you hadn't had conversations with Josh before, but after what seems like forever, you got to talk to him in an intimate setting again.

It wasn't easy getting one-on-one time with Josh when Sammy was around. Of course, you didn't mind it, but it wasn't a part of your usual routine that made it more exciting and made you crave the late-night talks more.

But you couldn't fight the guilty feeling of Sam sleeping in the room next to you as you and Josh talked. You were purposefully leaving him out of it to satisfy your own selfish desire of having Josh alone and fully attentive to you.

But it's not like anything was going to come from it, anyways. You would be doing the same thing for Sam had it been a better day on his end. You figured after the day he's had that leaving him alone would be best, even if you grew annoyed with the whole situation because it simply seemed childish to you.

But that was just Sam: protective over you in any way possible. Sometimes it came in handy, while other times it was just a little too intrusive. That was the only flaw in yours and his's friendship. But it was just a matter of him caring too much about you, and you shouldn't regard it as a flaw. Even if his intentions or words seemed over the top or outright dramatic, he meant well, for the most part.

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

And as the week went on, the routine of Josh coming to your bedroom nightly continued. Those talks were more intimate, in a platonic way, with you both talking about your lives and everything that's happened since you've two seen each other.

A part of you felt guilty for not discussing with Sam that you two were spending time together alone, since his freakout last week. But there was nothing going on other than a simple chat or a deep conversation that you could have with Sam, so it shouldn't poke at you with guilt that you couldn't get rid of. You thought about offering once or twice to Sam to join you and Josh, but it seemed like Josh preferred it when it was just you two or preferred that Sam didn't know.

Sam did eventually apologize to Josh for overreacting during the kayak trip. It took a day for him to work up the courage, because Sam has never been good with confrontation or admitting he was wrong. But, nonetheless, the gesture was appreciated, and it wasn't spoken of again.

As the days went on, and you all indulged in different activities, you noticed that more than half of your time was preoccupied with Josh. Sure, Sam was often by your side during most of your guys' conversations during the day or by the fire, but at night, it was a different story.

You evaluated your actions and decided that maybe spending so much time with Josh wasn't the best idea, considering how easily upset Sam got over small things that occurred between you and his brother. Even when you four were in the same room would Josh brush your arm or leg or make a joke that could be intended as flirty. But you knew him better to disregard that as Josh being himself, but Sam couldn't. Sam didn't care that it was in his brother's nature to be naturally flirty, because anyone can prevent their actions. And you noticed how aggravated Sammy would get, how his ears grew bright red at the sight of Josh landing his hand on your shoulder or knee. Or his lips would tighten into a sour expression.

You just hoped he didn't notice how your cheeks would flush from the innocent touches, or how your smile would reach your eyes anytime Josh said something to you. Or how you laughed a little more at one of his jokes than the rest of the group. You did all of these things without thought, but once you saw how tense Sam grew, you would beat yourself up in your head after the fact.

Were you making it too obvious you still had feelings for Josh? Or did Sam figure out how you felt about Josh instead of being oblivious to the fact?

Whatever it was, you couldn't let it keep you up at night or pick at your brain when the room was silent, since it practically became a routinely thing of worrying. Whether or not Sam was concerned, you knew it would be in your best, and his interest to not bring it up and leave it be.

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

taglist: @gvfleetwood @sacredjake @aureatopia @myeyehurtz @alexiagx @objectsinspvce @unhappycylinder @spinthehemmo @carbonwritingthroughtime

-part three-

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joshfuckingkiszka · 1 year ago

Text

𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔯𝔢𝔭𝔲𝔱𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫 𝔳𝔞𝔲𝔩𝔱 𝔥𝔞𝔰 𝔟𝔢𝔢𝔫 𝔬𝔭𝔢𝔫𝔢𝔡

joshua michael kiszka - end game

jacob thomas kiszka - dress

daniel robert wagner - king of my heart

samuel francis kiszka - call it what you want

bonus - daniel robert wagner - delicate

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ageofbajabule · 1 year ago

Text

Dawn of Love | Chapter 4

Josh Kiszka x Female Reader

Word Count: 5.9k

Warnings: Fluff, Anxiety, Sad Jake (just a little scene), Protected Sex, Depression, Talk of Cancer, Arguing, Fear of Abandonment, Mention of Death. (Please let me aware if I miss any!)

If you haven’t read Chapter 3 be sure to do so! And here is the Masterpost for the series.

Author’s Note: Hey!! I know it’s been a long time coming for this update, and I’m sorry it’s not a huge update. Time jumps are happening, especially within the next chapter as well. This chapter is really a filler, but it also adds more to the story that will make sense as it progresses so I do hope you enjoy it. I make sure that my work is up to par, and always give it my all. We’re almost halfway through the series!☺️

October 2014

All the trees have turned over, leaves starting to finally fall off the trees. Michigan was beautiful this time around, and Josh knew it was your favorite season. Perfect time for sweaters and hoodies, bonfires, apple picking and pumpkin patches.

University was offering a fall break a week before Halloween weekend. Josh had opted in making sure you guys had your halloween costumes planned out for Halloweekend here on campus. The costumes he had picked out were great for the two of you.

Josh had mentioned to his parents that the two of you would be staying over at their place for your fall break. Within the past month, your relationship with your dad hasn't been the greatest. He was still concerned about you attending school for a film and photography major. He still thought you should major in something that would “Logically” benefit you.

You felt bad about not staying at home to at least spend time with your mom and sister. But made sure to tell them you would spend time with them before you returned back to campus.

Josh and yourself had been extremely busy working on a film project that was due before your winter break. It was worth 60 percent of your grade. And he was taking every single measure and precaution for this film project. He was making sure the script was perfect, while he had you focus on costumes, make-up. And the two of you together focused on settings, themes, locations and how you were going to film it.

Jake was kind enough to help his twin out with another film. Even Ronnie had decided to join in on the project, a little family affair if you will. Josh said he trusted them to kill their roles they had been assigned. You even had your sister be a part of it as well.

It was finally Friday, Josh and you had your last class of the day. This weekend began your fall break, and the guys had a gig tomorrow night at Fischer Hall. They were excited to be performing there, they actually had been asked to come back a few times as the locals loved their performance. You were absolutely thrilled for them.

On the drive back home, you and Josh had made sure to stop by your house first as your dad was out for the day and your mom and sister were home. You hated having to avoid him, but just did what was best for yourself.

Upon arriving you and Josh made your way into the house, smelling your mom’s baking and hearing your sister’s music playing in the house. “Mom? Olivia?” You called out, walking into the kitchen you find your mom and sister baking cookies.

“Oh hi sweetie! I didn’t even hear you come in.” Your mother giggled softly dusting the flour off of her hands, pulling you in for a hug.

“I was wondering why it smelled so good in here.” You giggled hugging her back. Josh went to hug your sister while your mother kept hugging you.

“Your father is out for the whole day. Went on a fishing trip with the guys.” Your mom pulled away, and immediately went to hug Josh.

You walked over to your sister pulling her in for a hug. “Are they driving you insane these days?” You giggled.

“Always…” She laughed, hugging you tightly.

“Are you guys hungry? I was going to order takeout.” Your mom smiled as she resumed mixing the batter.

Josh and you both nodded in agreement. “Whatever you had in mind will be fine.” He smiled softly.

“I was thinking chinese.” Your mom hummed softly, as she continued to finish making up batches of cookies.

The rest of the evening was filled with laughter, catching up on what’s been going on for you with college. And your sister’s sophomore year, and how close her, Sam and Danny have gotten since you’ve gone off to college. It was nice to catch up with them as you hardly got to call them lately. You’ve been so busy with everything and felt ashamed for not reaching out more.

“Well sweetie, I’ve made up a jar of cookies for you to take back with you to campus. But you can grab them before you go back.” She smiled, putting the jar away to not be touched.

“Thank you mom, for everything. I really don’t know what I’d do without you…” You smiled, pulling her in for a hug.

“Oh, I’ll always be here for you. You know that…” She rubbed your back, hugging you tighter.

“Now, don’t be a stranger you two!” She pulled away smiling at the both of you.

You said your goodbyes to your sister, then headed over to Josh’s place.

Josh opted for parking in the street, as he wanted to let his parents have access to the driveway. He helped grab your bag from the backseat as you entered the house, you could hear his dad playing his harmonica and laughing from inside the family room.

The two of you went downstairs to the basement, preparing the pullout bed. While setting your things down there. Eventually Karen came downstairs to greet the two of you.

“Oh you guys made it in!” She smiled softly pulling you both in for a tight hug.

“Hi mom.” Josh chuckled softly, rubbing her back.

“How have classes been?” She pulled away, putting her hands on her hips.

You and Josh look at each other not sure who to let speak first, but then Josh cuts in.

“Classes have been great! Y/N and I have quite a few together, but some others we don’t.” He rubbed your arm softly.

“Yeah, Josh has been a great help though as well. I thought for sure I was gonna be lost on campus.” You giggled softly.

“It’s nice that the two of you have each other… I’m sure you’ve made plenty of friends though.” She smiled brightly. You smile softly, seeing how similar Josh and Karen’s smiles were.

“That we have. It’s a very different atmosphere, but it’s nice.” Josh smiled.

“Well I know you guys ate already, I talked to your mom Y/N. I’m sure the two of you are tired and want some rest. So I'll leave you to it.” She smiled, kissing Josh and your cheek softly.

“Goodnight.”

“Goodnight Mom.”

“Goodnight Mrs.Kiszka.”

The next day Josh and you were woken up by Jake and Sam bickering.

“No Sam! You can’t just make a last minute change of the setlist. We need to all be in agreement with it.” Jake yelled.

“It’s just because you don’t want to perform this one fucking song!” Sam yelled back at him.

“Samuel Francis!” You heard Karen yell out.

“I’m sorry mom… But seriously Jake. Get over yourself, just say you want total control of it.”

You walked up the steps to see Sam storming past you running upstairs to his room slamming his door shut.

“Good Morning sweetie!” Karen beamed, pulling you into a hug.

You hugged her back, swaying with her. “Good morning!”

She pulled away slowly, and resumed back to making breakfast. Waffles had been made, she was cooking bacon and finishing up the eggs.

“I hope you’re all hungry. Especially for today’s events.” She smiled softly as she finished cooking and getting plates out.

“Let me help you set the table.” You rushed to help her setting the table.

“Thank you.” She smiled, kissing the top of your head.

Eventually Josh made his way from downstairs, heading into the kitchen getting himself orange juice. He helped the two of you with the table.

“Good morning, sunny.” He kissed your cheek softly.

“Good morning.” You hummed softly.

“Samuel, come on down and eat.” Kelly yelled, coming into the dining room.

Everyone eventually piled in, sitting in their normal seats. You could feel the tension between Jake and Sam, as Kelly tried to make a conversation happen with Ronnie. Which worked, Ronnie talked about how she was planning on studying abroad after graduation.

As everyone listened to Ronnie talk about her future plans, you sat back thinking of all the choices you were making lately for yourself. Worrying if you had made the right ones and that you weren’t going to regret then later. But the love you had for photography and film was strong, and you couldn’t see yourself doing anything else but that.

Your thoughts were shortly interrupted by Josh, “What do you think, Sunny?

“I’m sorry, what was the question?” You shook your thoughts away giggling softly.

“My parents were wondering if you wanted to join us this year on our annual ski trip?”

Karen and Kelly were looking at you smiling softly.

“If it’s not a problem, I’d love to join!” You smiled brightly.

“Of course it’s not a problem! You’re a part of the family now.” Kelly chuckled softly.

Arriving at Fischer Hall brought back memories from the first night the guys performed there. They were so nervous, but now they frequently play a show here. And since then they’ve earned quite the audience. You were helping bring gear into the Hall, helping the guys set up.

Since being around them more, you’ve learned where everything goes, how to help tune Jake’s guitar. You’ve probably remembered some notes by now even. But you wouldn’t ever pick up an instrument.

Jake was agitated tonight, it was plain to see in his face. You normally let him come to you if something was bothering him, but tonight was the night you would ask him yourself. He was hanging around the back, pacing back and forth.

“Hey Jake… What’s going on?” You said softly as you treaded lightly.

“Val. She uh. She wanted to-“ He let out a big breath. “She broke things off.” He said flatly, his eyes glossed over.

“Oh Jake… I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you say something sooner?” You pulled him into a hug.

He hugged you back tightly, “It only happened just this morning… Hence why I was being an ass to Sam.” He sniffled while chuckling.

You giggled, pulling away slowly, “He’ll understand one day.”

“Yeah, and besides… I should’ve known that she wasn’t going to stick around much longer. She’s in her senior year, and her dad thinks we’re going absolutely nowhere with the band… Maybe it's better off this way.” He shrugged his shoulders.

“Well, I for one think you guys are going places. The talent you all have! Come on.” You smiled softly.

“Thanks Y/N… You have no idea how much that means to us, especially Josh…”

You nodded, smiling softly. “Come on, it’s almost time for y’all to perform.”

Especially Josh… What had he meant by that?

December 2014

Winter break had finally come, Michigan weather wasn’t easy to adjust to. Even after living two winters here. Classes wouldn’t restart until a week after the new year, so you had an entire month of freedom from classes.

Josh and yourself were excited to finally be done with your first semester. Your final project for your film class that the two of you had worked on was a major success.

You had decided on staying at the Kiszka’s house again over your winter break. Things with your dad were still rocky, you were absolutely convinced he would never change his view on your passion.

Arriving at their house, the front lawn and front of the house was decorated in Christmas decor. You smiled softly as Kelly was helping Karen finish the last touches to the snowflake lights they were placing alongside the house.

“Oh hey kiddos! We’re just finishing up.” Karen smiled softly finishing the last touches as Kelly helped her down.

“Hi Mr. and Mrs. Kiszka!” You smiled hauling your bag with you as Josh followed behind.

“Oh honey please, call me Karen. You’ve known us long enough now, and you’re family.” She giggled softly pulling you in for a hug.

Family. You hadn’t felt so welcomed in what felt like a long time. Sure everything with your sister and mom were good, but since things were still rocky with your dad it made it difficult to feel like a family with them.

“Now we are set to leave around 8am tomorrow. It’s about a 5 hour drive. But the boys always just sleep on the way there.” She giggled softly.

“I’ll be okay to sit in a car for 5 hours. I’ve sat in one for 16…” You groaned remembering back on the trip back to Florida one year.

“Besides, sunny you’ll have me to keep you company.” Josh kissed your cheek softly, he gathered your things, throwing what was going on the ski trip into his parents vehicle. While taking the rest into the house.

Karen ushered you to go inside, you smiled walking into their home seeing their Christmas tree was put up with just the lights.

“We were waiting for the two of you to get home before we decorated the tree.” Karen smiled, pulling the box of ornaments out.

“It's a family tradition to help out decorating the tree together.” Kelly rubbed Karen’s back.

You smiled in awe of them. As they opened the box, revealing all of the ornaments they’ve collected over the years. You smiled softly looking at the ornaments made for each of them for their first christmas. You traced your finger over the details of Josh’s first ornament.

“Oh Josh was the cutest baby…” Karen sighed softly, reminiscing. “All of you were cute!” She laughed, looking at them all.

“It’s okay mom, we know Josh is the favorite.” Ronnie chipped in.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Josh bickered back, as Ronnie giggled.

“Mama’s boy.”

“Okay Ronnie. Daddy’s girl.” He rolled his eyes at her. You playfully smacked his arm, “Be nice to your sister.”

He stuck his tongue out at you playfully. The two of you and everyone else started to put ornaments on the tree. After about a few minutes of setting the ornaments in their rightful place the last thing to be added was the star.

“Jake, would you do the honors?” Kelly asked, handing him the star. Jake nodded, taking it from his hands, stepping on the step stool placing the star on top of the tree and plugging it into the lights.

Once he stepped down carefully everyone stood back admiring the tree before Sam plugged it in. “Go ahead Sammy.” Karen smiled at him softly.

Sam then plugged the lights into the outlet, making the tree come to life. It was all colorful and beautiful. Everyone gasped in awe. “Good work everyone.” Karen smiled, clapping her hands.

The rest of the night was spent making dinner with Karen for the family. She ended up making the boy's favorite dish, as well baking some brownies to end the night.

“You know Y/N… You bring the best out in Joshua.” Karen smiled softly as she put away the clean dishes.

You smile softly looking out to the family room seeing Josh getting into a serious card game with his siblings. “I like to think he brings the best out in me…” You blushed, turning your attention back to his mom.

“Anytime he needs help with planning your dates, he always calls me. Freaking out if he’s doing the right things, saying the right things. And I always assure him that he’s doing just fine.” She giggles softly, finishing up with the dishes.

“So you’re the mastermind…” You giggled while taking a sip of your hot tea.

“Ah, not necessarily. I just tell him to speak and think with his heart. I play no part in planning.” She giggled while taking a sip from her mug.

“You are raising great boys Mrs. Kiszka…”

“Call me Karen… We’ve gone past this, you’re family now.” She walked over to you pulling you in for a hug.

You hugged her back tightly. “Thank you guys for letting me be a part of this… It means a lot to me. More than you will ever know.”

“Oh sweetie,” She pulled away slowly, grabbing your face with her hands. “You are always loved and accepted here. Don’t you ever doubt that for a second.”

You felt tears brimming at your eyes. She wiped them away quickly. “I know things have been hard with your father… Your mom and I speak all the time. And I just want you to know, don’t ever be afraid to reach out to us.”

You nodded slowly, gathering yourself. “Thank you…”

“Come on, let’s see what these hooligans are up to.” She patted your arm softly.

The drive to the ski resort wasn’t too bad. A little cramped and bumpy, but fun nonetheless. The cabin they have reserved was beautiful, it was almost similar to the lake house they had. Josh and yourself got your own room, everyone did actually this time. You all unpacked your bags, then got in your skiing gear.

Josh, Jake, and yourself opted for snowboarding on your trip here. Where everyone else was going skiing. You liked the thrill better of snowboarding than skiing. Especially the flexibility that came with snowboarding. You grabbed your board, following behind Jake as Josh walked beside you.

The three of you then hopped onto the lift, taking in the scenery as you went up the trail. “This is really beautiful here…”

Josh smiled, “You’re beautiful.”

“Oh, how original Josh.” Jake chuckled, as you lightly smacked him.

“It’s definitely beautiful out here. We’ve been coming here for what…. 6 years Josh?” He looked at his twin.

Josh then nodded, “Yeah. We used to go to another ski resort for years before we found this one. This one was closer and had a lot more to offer.”

Before you knew it, you reached the top to get off of the lift. You walked over to the hill incline where everyone started to go down the slopes to ride their snowboards.

“Don’t be nervous, it’s a little scary at first. But you’ll get the hang of it.” Josh smiled, rubbing your cheek softly.

“I’ll be fine.” You smiled softly, kissing him.

He kissed you back, then pulled away as he pulled his goggles down and put his mask to cover his face from the harsh wind. In which you did the same, you then placed your feet into your board clipping your feet into place.

Eventually Jake had already made his way down the trail, picking up speed as he went. Like the dare devil he was. You decided to take your time down the slope when you first pushed yourself to go. Josh stayed somewhat behind you to keep an eye out for you. You giggled softly as you started to pick up the speed, and went around people on the trail. Josh now had to keep up with you, you looked back to see he was practically on your tail now.

You could see him shaking his head as he chuckled. You finally reached the bottom of the slope, removing your goggles while looking over at Josh who just stopped.

“Not bad for your first time there, sunny…” He smiled softly.

“I guess I had a good teacher.” You shrugged, laughing softly. Making him shake his head as he broke into laughter.

Late July 2015

First year of college had been relatively the easiest year. But your next year wasn’t going to be, you had even more classes to take this semester than the last two. Assignments were bigger, and tests were worth more to your final grades as you read some of the requirements for said classes.

Josh and yourself had spent most of the summer at each other’s houses. Your father had tried to work better on your relationship, but it was still rocky. You were only ever really home for the sake of your mom and sister. The guys have been picking up more gigs and have recently been working with a record label in talks of potentially signing. You couldn’t be any happier for them.

The guys and yourself took a day trip to their family’s lake house. Josh wanted to get you out of the house and away from home to get your mind off things. He always made sure you were in touch with nature, said it helps cleanse the mind. Which you couldn’t argue with that.

You were looking forward to spend a day away. You hadn’t been giving yourself the much needed time away. Josh had planned a small picnic for the two of you, and made it clear to the guys he didn’t want them bothering the two of you. The two of you walked to the other side of the lake where another dock was at. He laid everything out for your small picnic, where in the distance Sam, Danny and Jake looked like little beings. You never took in how big the land was here.

“Sunny, can you pull out the strawberries?” He smiled softly at you as he placed everything else out. You nodded, reaching into the basket pulling out the strawberries. Noticing they were covered in chocolate.

“How did you know!” You smiled softly, looking over at him.

“A little birdie told me.” He smiled, kissing your cheek.

You blushed at the thoughtfulness. Chocolate covered strawberries were one of your favorite snacks. Especially in the summertime. You pulled one out offering it to Josh first, in which he obliged by taking a bite. He then grabbed one feeding it to you. Giggling softly you eat from his hand.

“Thank you for taking me out today…” You sighed softly.

He nodded, “I figured we could both use a day away from reality.” He grabbed your hand, rubbing it softly with his thumb.

You looked at all of the trees, listening to the birds chirps and the summer breeze rolling through making the trees bustle. Breathing in the fresh air, as Josh slipped behind you letting you rest against his chest. He began to play with your hair, running it through slowly. Humming contently as he massaged your scalp.

“I love you…” It came out rather quietly from your lips.

“I love you…” You could tell he was smiling by the tone of his voice.

His hand one hand traveled down your arm slowly, lightly tracing down to your wrist and dragging it back up. Giving you goosebumps as he did that. You giggled softly, running your hand along his free hand.

His hand then crept its way across your abdomen, slipping down your waistline slowly as he stills his hand. “Is this okay mama?”

Your breath got caught in your throat, “Y-yes…” You nodded softly, leaning into his touch. As he slipped his hand past your bikini bottoms, his fingers gently brush over your bundle of nerves causing a slight gasp to escape your lips.

“All this for me…” He whispered against the shell of your ear, nibbling at it softly.

“All for you….” You moaned quietly as his ring and middle finger slipped inside of you. He pumped them slowly as he planted kisses down your neck.

Biting your lip softly, you look out at the lake to see if anyone would notice such a lewd scene. But you were broken out of your trance.

“They are too far away from here to even notice… Just let go for me… I know you’re there, I can feel you tightening around my fingers.” He kissed your cheek softly.

You nodded slowly, letting your orgasm wash over you as he kept pumping his fingers. You moaned his name out, he let you come undone holding you close to him. You could feel his erection pressing into your backside.

Sitting up as you turn around to face him you see his honey glazed eyes. You giggled softly, slipping your hand into his swim trunks, taking him firmly in your hand pumping slowly.

“Baby…” His breath hitched,

“Shh… It’s my turn to take care of you.” You smiled softly, pulling his trunks down to reveal his hardened cock. You could see the tip was leaking with his arousal swiping it gently with your thumb rolling it over, causing a hiss from him.

Gently you take him into your mouth, settling yourself between his legs, you took every inch of him slowly without making yourself gag. You had been working on getting better with it, he always assured you that you didn’t have to go down on him. But the thing is, you liked to.

Hearing your name fall from his lips made you hum in response, you started to pick up the pace by using your one hand to stroke him as you bobbed your head up and down. Your saliva coating his cock as you take him into your mouth.

His head rolled back, as his eyes did too. His one hand took a grip to your hair, holding it back for you as you kept sucking him off.

“Baby… You keep going l-like that. I’m not gonna last much longer…” He was twitching slightly, you removed your mouth, sighing softly.

“I need to feel you.” He kissed your lips softly, grabbing a condom from the basket he had made up.

“Always prepared…” You giggled softly, removing your bottoms as he ripped open the package placing the rubber over his dick.

“As much as I’d love to have kids with you, one day. But today’s not the day.” He chuckled, laying you down gently on the towels he brought along. He lined himself up with you, teasing your entrance.

“I thought you were just saying you needed to feel me?” You got cocky with him, earning a shit grin from him.

“Don’t be a brat…” He growled at you. With that he slipped himself inside of you, earning groans from the both of you.

Slowly he began pumping in and out of you with languid strokes. You wrapped your arms around his back, pulling him closer to you as your legs wrapped around his waist. He bent down kissing your lips softly, eager to kiss him back, slipping your tongue into his mouth.

Panting for one another has he kept at his strong pace, he lifted your one leg to rest against his chest to get a better angle. To hit deeper, you let out a cry of pleasure. He smirked, kissing the inside of your leg as he kept thrusting harder.

“J-josh…” Your eyes rolled back as he kept hitting that spot he knew so well.

“I know baby…” He moaned out, his hair sticking to his forehead.

You felt the band inside of you ready to snap, with the next few thrusts your thighs started shaking as you let your second orgasm come over you. Josh’s hips stuttered as he came as well, breathing heavily he kissed your lips softly.

“You’re so perfect, my sunshine…”

Early October 2015

Josh and yourself got assigned to the same dorm building again. This time the two of you were on the same floor. Your classes this semester only two of them you shared, whereas all the other courses you were by yourself. But the upperhand of that was room for you to grow.

You started to get more involved in your photography, earning more clients with your work. And take it upon yourself to start a short film with a classmate. Josh encouraged you to take a leap at a new project with a new partner rather than working with him all the time.

Your parents had called you urgently this Friday and asked you to come home for the weekend, in which you couldn’t argue as you missed them. Josh opted to stay on campus this weekend being he had a project to work on.

Arriving home, it was dead silent in the house. You looked around, calling out for anyone.

“In here pumpkin…” Your dad called out, heading towards the dining room is where your family sat. Looking like an intervention.

“What’s going on?” Your nerves are catching up with you now, as you fidgeted with the chair pulling it out to sit beside your sister.

“Y/N, sweetie. Your father… well.” Your mother’s voice was breaking as she tried to speak.

“I have kidney cancer.” He said out flatly.

You felt your heart sink, like an anchor lowering to hold its ship. Tears started to form, “How long have you known…”

“It’s only been 3 months…” Your father choked out.

“Why didn’t you tell me then!” You felt angry with your father and that they waited this long to tell you.

“Because you were getting ready to go back onto campus… And we didn’t want to drop it onto you, until it got serious.” Your mother spoke softly.

“I have to stay here, I can take a couple weeks off. Help around…”

Your parents shook their heads, “No you can’t jeopardize your education.”

You sniffled back tears, “No. I want to take a break. I need to be here with you… We haven’t been on the best of terms, and I’m not going to potentially lose you without spending more time with you.”

“Honey, my days are filled with chemotherapy… I don’t think you want to see me go through all of that…”

“Dad. You have always been there for me, it's our turn. Let me be here for you. Just for a couple weeks? I’ll go back after Thanksgiving break. I can talk to my professors and I'm sure they will understand.” You walked over to him kneeling beside him.

“Pumpkin. It’s shouldn’t be too much of anything to worry about. The doctor’s are hopeful the treatments will work. They’ve seen great results.” He smiled cupping your cheek wiping away your fallen tears.

“I promise I will go back after Thanksgiving break. Just please… Let me be here with you. I will never forgive myself.”

“Alright, fine. But you are going back after Thanksgiving break. And be sure to have all your professors know.” He gave a half smile, hurt that his daughter was giving up her schooling to spend time with him.

It had been 2 weeks since hearing the news, immediately that night you had called Josh letting him know everything. And that you wouldn’t be returning to classes until after Thanksgiving break. He was understanding of your choice and supported it all.

Josh kept you up to date on all the things happening on campus. In which you were grateful for, but it made you feel like you were missing out on so much, although you wanted to be here for your dad through these hard times. Especially with helping your sister get through her junior year, Sam was helping her with her assignments over the last two weeks as well.

Josh’s POV

It has been almost 3 weeks since Y/N found out about her father having cancer. Hearing she was taking a break from school broke my heart, knowing how much it meant to her. But, she always knew what was best for her.

Lately I’ve been questioning what I want to do with my life… Film has always been such a passion for me, but this whole music thing with Jake is really starting to become something. And I’m terrified to even explain that to her, she would be heartbroken to find out I’ve decided to drop out.

I have to do this right…

I decided to pack up my things and make my way home, but not without stopping at Y/N’s first. Parking in her driveway, I get out of my car nervously walking up to the front door knocking softly. Her mother opens the door, surprised to see me.

“Oh my god, Josh… It’s so good to see you sweetie.” She pulled you in for a hug.

“It’s good to see you, is Y/N home?”

She pulled away slowly, nodding her head. “Josh… She’s. She needs you I think more than ever…” You could see the tears forming in her eyes.

Nodding softly, you make way to Y/N’s room. Knocking softly on her door you hear silent sobs. “It’s unlocked…”

You step in quietly finding her lying underneath the covers. “Sunny…”

Hearing her shuffle from under the bed, “Josh?” She sat up fixing her hair, she looked like she had been crying for a while.

“Yeah, it’s me.” You smiled softly as your heart broke looking at her in this state. You slipped your shoes off and slipped under the sheets with her.

She wrapped herself around you tightly, sobbing into your chest. You wrapped your arms around her tightly, running your hand through her hair.

“I’m so scared Josh… I don’t know what I’ll do if I lose him.”

“Hey… Don’t think that way. Everything is going to be fine. He’s going to get through this, he’s a strong man.” You soothed her, kissing the top of her head.

You felt your nerves getting to yourself. It’s now or never Josh…

“Sunny, I have something to tell you…”

She looked up at you, “What’s wrong?”

“So I’m staying home.”

“Oh are you going back after Thanksgiving like me?” She smiled softly, caressing your cheek.

You shook your head slowly, “I actually won’t be returning at all…” You let out under a whisper.

“W-what?” She choked on her words.

“I dropped out, to start focusing on this music thing more with Jake.” There, it was out. You said it.

“Josh I don’t understand… I thought you said film was your dream?” She sat up facing you.

“It is, or was. I don’t know, Jake really thinks we can take off. We’ve been speaking to an agent for some time now…” You held her hands.

She shook her hands away, standing up from the bed. “No! This isn’t how it’s supposed to be…” She started sobbing.

Her POV

Josh stood up from your bed. “Sunny…”

“Don’t, sunny me! Josh… You said, you even. You told me you were going to stick with it… Even if you guys went somewhere with this…” You ran a hand through your hair.

“I thought you would be supportive of this!” He was upset now.

“I am, it’s just…”

“It’s just what?”

“Josh, this is a lot to handle right now…” You sighed.

“You don’t think I know that? Your mother was crying to me, worried about you. That has me worried sick. I’m not going anywhere, just because I’m not chasing after my original dream doesn’t mean I’m not excited about this new journey.” He grabbed you by the shoulders making you look at him.

“Josh… But what if you leave me? What if you find someone that…” You looked at him with tears in your eyes.

“Y/N, I love you. And I’m always going to be here. You’re my sunshine. Forever. I’m not going anywhere.” He caressed your cheek with his thumb.

“Promise.” You looked at him scared.

“Promise.” He held your hand up kissing it softly.

“No more secrets. I want to know everything…” You sighed softly.

He nodded in agreement, “I won’t hide anything… I swear.”

You nodded, wrapping yourself in his arms, hugging him tightly as you sobbed in his arms from everything that was going on. You felt alone, but you knew you weren’t. It was hard times right now, and you could only hope that they would get better. Or so you thought…

To be continued

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obetrolncocktails · 2 years ago

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If this is it now | Josh Kiszka X Reader | Part 1

Word count: 1.4K

Warnings: anger, breakup, sorrow, loneliness--basically everything that comes with a long distance break up.

Summary: It's not like him. It's not like him to not call, or to not text. But then again, after how little you spoke with him over the last few weeks, you were beginning to question if you really did know him.

The sun rose, spilling rays of crisp light upon your bed linens. You watched through squinted eyelids as tiny particles danced aimlessly in the light. To be so careless, drifting to the whims of the room’s draft–it was a peace that now only filled you with loneliness– it was beginning to consume you. Rolling over, you found untouched pillows and rested your head on the cool fabric, yet another indicator of the empty side of the bed. His impression wasn’t pressed into the sheets anymore and his scent no longer lingered about your home. It had been weeks since Josh had made the trip to London to see you. It was a strategic decision the two of you had made knowing that he would be swamped with tour dates and obligations before you both knew it. You knew that it was selfish to feel the way you did, but nothing helped to ease your sorrow.

Since the day he left, you could count the interactions between the two of you on your fingers, losing hope of hearing from him. So many calls went to voicemail, too many texts left unanswered or halted with short-changed responses that filled you with annoyance and longing for his attention.

“Josh, are you happy?” You send the text message with no follow up.

The early morning hours passed and you forgot that you had even sent it in the first place. You had moved from your bed to your couch, having trouble making yourself do anything of value. You spent most of the afternoon falling in and out of sleep, flipping through different shows to occupy you.

“What do you mean, baby?” You took a while to debate what to send as a response.

“Nothing, I hope you’re having a good day.” You withdrew completely. Today was your birthday–and from him? Nothing. You didn’t have the energy to argue with him, and in truth, you didn’t want to. You ached for his touch–anything that would remind you that he actually loved you and more importantly, that he wanted you, but he had forgotten about you.

“What’s wrong, Y/N? Can I call you after rehearsal? Shouldn’t last too long tonight.”

“I’m fine, Josh. I’m tired. Probably won’t be up much longer.”

“Josh? You never call me Josh–I’ll call you as soon as I’m done.”

You didn’t respond. Instead, you turned the phone over and set it on the coffee table, rising from the depths of the couch that had been swallowing you, much like the sorrow that had taken over. You brought yourself to take a shower and get dressed, and it did make you feel better, even if it was in the most miniscule way.

You had never felt this disconnected from him. Dread began to leak into almost every moment of the day, tarnishing your mood about almost everything. It was noon in Nashville, the time difference separating you both by seven hours. You knew that his promise would be broken as soon as any good idea filled the rehearsal space. You’d be long forgotten by then. You lost hope of interaction by the time seven PM rolled around in Nashville, setting your phone to ‘do not disturb.’ Your eyes burned from staying up so late for his attention.

“Sorry, baby, Got caught up with the boys–on to something great.”

You left his message drifting unanswered, just like the particles you had watched earlier in the morning, except this time the action was filled with unease and brokenheartedness. You drowned yourself in the nearest shitty bottle of wine you could find, falling asleep halfway into the bottle. Your arms and legs splayed sloppily over the edge of the couch, your tv flashing images upon the pale walls of your living room. You woke up to find your carpeted floor stained dark red, the wine bottle having tipped over from your restless sleep. “Fuck!” You spat the words at yourself. You wobbled to the hallway, grabbing a washcloth from the linen closet and wetting it in the nearest sink before returning to the stain, dabbing at it the best you could. Just as you expected, the stain only feathered into a larger blob as you wiped, ruining the carpet further. “Goddamn it!” You shouted, flinging the dripping rag at the nearest wall, watching as crimson liquid spattered upon the surface before dripping miserably all the way to the floor.

Your phone rang just in time to pause your outburst. Josh’s contact picture popped up–it was a photo of the two of you, him pulling you in from the side, kissing you on your cheek. His eyes pinched closed with a bright smile. The photo that filled you with butterflies now filled you with anger. You both couldn’t have looked happier in that moment, and it was true. You remembered that day with a longing that tore you apart.

“Hello,” You said, pulling the phone to your ear. Your voice was coated with grogginess and sleep.

“Hey–I know it’s about two o’clock your time, wanted to check in.” Two?! You pulled the phone from your ear, checking the time. 2:09 P.M.

“Oh, uh. Wow, didn’t realize it was so late,” you responded, offering a half chuckle. You reached up with a free hand to absently scratch at your scalp.

“Slept in, didn't you, sleepy head?” Josh’s tone was light. He seemed to be trying today.

“Yeah, we’ll say that.” Your responses were short and they didn’t give Josh much room to respond, making conversation hard. In truth, you really didn’t care. You wanted him to feel the way that his lack of communication and care had made you feel.

“So I wanted to say sorry about last night. We got caught up and I just didn’t want to reach out when I knew you’d be aslee–”

“It’s fine.” You cut him off promptly, knowing the script all too well.

“Y/n,” he contested.

“I can’t do this today, Josh. I just can’t.”

“You can’t talk to me?” He asked simply, the words setting you ablaze.

“That’s fucking rich coming from you. You forgot my fucking birthday!”

There was silence on his end and you were sure he was looking at the date. You waited for him. “Oh my god.” Another silence, then a drawn out sigh. “Y/n. I am so sorry, baby. I-....I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry.” His voice sputtered nervously, stopping and starting, finally giving up when he had nothing better to say.

“You don’t just fucking desert your girlfriend when you become busy, Josh. Do you realize how selfish that is? You’ve whittled me down to little more than a pen pal.” Both ends of the phone call remain silent for several excruciating seconds. “Even when you were here, you were distant. You couldn’t even focus when we were fucking–” You stopped yourself from drilling further. You had even hurt yourself.

“I was jet lagged and stressed–dealing with tour preparation, execs breathing down my back. I didn’t mean to-”

“Cut the bullshit, Josh,” You cut him off mid-sentence. “ Something has changed between us, and it’s fucking killing me. I just don’t know how much longer I can be strung along begging for the attention that you can’t give. Living halfway across the world doesn’t help.”

“Y/N. Why are you doing this? I love you.”

“I love you more than you could possibly understand, Josh–But loving me just isn’t enough anymore. I feel unbelievably lonely in this relationship.”

“Are we really doing this over a shitty phone call right now, Y/N? I can fix this. As soon as the tour is over I will come see you.”

“Josh, just stop. You won’t be able to see me until July. I don’t think I can pretend for that long.”

“Pretend to love me?” He asked, growing more and more upset.

“Pretending to act like this relationship is going to work. The distance is hard enough, but with you touring and making the new album…there’s just no room for me.”

“Y/n, please don’t do this. Not like this.” He pleaded with you through the phone.

“Goodbye Josh.” There was so much more that you wanted to say, but if you started, you’d never stop crying. It was the last bit of humility that you would keep.

“Y/n…baby. Y/n? Y–” Your thumb hesitated over the button before you finally ended the call. Though the phone weighed only mere ounces, it felt like a bag of bricks, weighing you down into the floor.

End of Part 1.

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littlemisslipbalm · 1 year ago

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Demonology - Part 5

I Think I'm Going to Hell -- Jake x f!Reader x Josh

A/N: Hi we're back. Last chapter after this! Hopefully it's been an enjoyable ride. All will be revealed and all will be settled by the end of part 6 btw. (Hopefully!)

Chapter Summary: A demon's earth-versary that coincides with her original birthday...a bar, an ancient demon and bad tempers. Nothing could go wrong.

Word Count: 4.9k | Warnings: explicit SMUT (18+), strong language, dubious understandings of demonology, BLOOD, alcohol consumption...eh idk what else just demon sex

Taglist | Masterpost

Part 5: I Think I'm Going To Hell

“Let’s go already!” Jake called gruffly down the hallway.

Today, Y/N had let Jake into her place upon his arrival. It was announced, she was expecting him, so he was allowed to wait in the living room. He was getting impatient though. He hadn’t seen her at all since he’d been there, her door opening on its own when he had called out who it was.

“Do we have to go?” She calls back, still formless for all Jake knows.

“What happened to the demon I met 6 months ago? Who I had to beg to stop fucking with the bars?” Jake grins to himself, Rori on his lap. The demon had won the animal over and they were quite friendly whenever they saw each other. Sometimes Jake would run into just Rori out and about these days.

“She was naive. She didn’t realize just how much it sucked here and that her identity was not all she thought and she didn’t know that there’d be an annoying but hot angel–” She wasn’t yelling, but Jake could hear her as if she were standing in front of him. He figured it was a trick she could do.

“Alright, alright, so is now not a good time to mention that Josh still hasn’t turned up?” Jake wasn’t sure if he wanted to soften the blow or not, so he threw it out there, wondering how it would stick with his demon colleague.

Josh had been MIA for two months. Ever since the dive bar and the ensuing events at his apartment. Jake had tried mildly to reassure Y/N that it was not because of her, but with no word from Josh either, Jake was starting to grow worried as well. He’d gone years without seeing Josh, but he usually checked in or gave a forwarding address when he was going to be gone for a long period of time. This was pretty unusual, Josh was a planner and this was clearly not planned.

She finally appeared in the living room, eyes wide and skirt unzipped with one boot unlaced. Half-dressed and distressed at Jake’s words, but trying to mask it with disdain.

“Well, it’s not surprising at this point. It really doesn’t matter to us, does it?”

Jake shook his head in agreement and stood, “Then why don’t you finish getting ready so we can have a good time. You being sulky really doesn’t do it for me.”

“I’m not supposed to do anything for you anymore if I remember correctly,” She parses, walking back to her room. “Never again.” She repeats in a low voice Jake wasn’t sure was supposed to mimic his own.

He chuckles a little and looks at the dog sitting next to the spot he had just occupied. Rori stared blankly back at Jake, seeming to remember why he had found the demon traitorous before.

“I’m trying to be her mentor, damn,” Jake mumbles under his breath so hopefully only Rori hears him.

Jake promised the bar they were headed for wasn’t lame. The demon’s 6 month anniversary of being back Earth-side also happened to coincide with her ‘human’ birthday. They had made no progress on learning what she really was and she hadn’t had another panic attack yet so they were biding their time.

She was filled with melancholy as of late. Sad she wasn’t as happy as when she’d first come. Sad she still didn’t know who she was. And sad that Josh had abandoned her. She was fine…besides all of that.

With the search for her true identity on indefinite hold and Josh MIA, Jake was trying to be nice. And he really didn’t know how to do that. He had set up this birthday-anniversary soiree when she had mentioned it in passing one night when they were writing up their reports together. They had to, to ensure that both of them weren’t claiming they had created some new evil that they were stealing from the human’s creation. But she had mentioned it and with her so down in the mouth all the time, Jake thought that taking her out would help take her mind off of everything. He hadn’t planned on her being so fucking reluctant about it all, but he was trying in his own way to hide his disappointment.

He grabbed drinks from the bar immediately when they arrived, knowing she would probably want a bottle of red wine and himself a bottle of whiskey. He came to the barstool seats she had found in the corner with the two full bottles and two appropriate glasses. She appreciated his foresight about the amount of alcohol and his demon abilities at procurring these items.

For some reason, which definitely didn’t have to do with her sadness that she was fine about, she didn’t feel like dancing that night, content to watch Jake. Much to Jake’s chagrin.

“C’mon,” Jake almost pleaded, he was trying so hard to get her into the evening but she was half way through her wine and nowhere close to being the life of the party he knew she could be. “It’s your fucking birthday and you don’t look a day over 27.”

He winked with his stupid joke and she rolled her eyes at him, insisting he could go without her. “I’ll be happier over here. If I go out there, I might swallow someone whole.”

Jake tipped his head closer and she could smell the whiskey on his breath, his chest warm practically touching her nose. “You know that nobody would mind that.”

“You’ll get more action without me, Jake.” She presses on his chest, causing him to take a quick step back as he stares at her face intently. “I’d be way too distracting for anyone to even think of dancing with you.”

The smirk on her face makes Jake feel like he’s triumphed a little. It was a flicker of her happier, more confident self. That’s what he wanted for her. It was depressing to see a pretty much all-powerful being being all sad all the time. He blows a kiss her way and then saunters through the crowd, easily taking the center how she normally would.

He turns his body back to face her once he’s where he wishes to be and raises his chin, silently seeing if she’ll come join him one more time. She sips her wine in response and crosses her legs, relaxing her joints into the grooves of the wooden countertop.

Without much time for himself, women began to flock to Jake. It was hilarious to watch from an outsider’s perspective. He was given free shots left and right and she laughed to herself. She wasn’t sure if it was Jake’s demonic presence that encouraged the women or if it was simply the way he looked. He flashed an evil grin that human women took as charming. His black unbuttoned button down, tucked into his baggy black pants on one side while the other hung loose, he looked rugged and expensive. He had pulled his glasses down onto his face when he had entered the dance floor and maybe those shrouded him in mystery. His clean black boots had white embroidered snakes curling around the sides as if they disappeared up into his pants.

Sweat began to gather in the notch between his collarbones and at his temple the longer he stayed on the dance floor. He had a rotation of women dancing about him and he seemed to love the music that was playing. Y/N agreed, while she didn’t recognize the songs, she hadn’t immediately moved to change it upon their arrival.

Her eyes watched the way Jake’s body moved and was reminded of the way it had felt. She didn’t like to think about her first night with Jake often because it had been something special and beautiful which was so unlike anything else about their relationship. It was like that one night had existed outside of the reality in which they lived. Jake, after that, had been gruff and professional with her. Little comments here and there would slip through the cracks, but she chalked them up to demon nature.

That night was a microcosm. How he had writhed above her and done anything she asked. How she had laid in his arms afterward and felt safe and seen. It was unlike anything she had ever felt in this world and then it was ripped from her. It was painful to reminisce on it because she knew she could never have it that way again. Why? She wasn’t exactly sure, but she thought it was because Jake didn’t like that he had let someone in. She didn’t press, but sometimes late at night her mind would slip to memories of Jake on his knees and Jake inside her. Or right now.

She was watching him dance, women grinding themselves back onto him as he let his hair shake out behind his shoulders and she remembered what it had felt like to be in his powerful embrace. Like Josh, yet so extremely different. So different she couldn’t begin to think which she preferred. Given that Jake had shut her down about ever fucking again and her night with Josh had quite literally driven him away, she wasn’t exactly sure she’d ever have to choose since both of them had chosen for her.

As she wallowed in her dwindling wine, she allowed herself to wonder if this was all actually real and not just her own hell. A world where she was allegedly special, but in reality she was cursed. Cursed to have the two men she’d ever felt real connections with reject her after she’d had sex with them and then forced to live the rest of her time with them just out of her reach and have a mundane confusing existence as an ‘other’, an outsider, in the world she had once loved.

She shot straight up in her seat, discarding her wine with a finality to it and began to march through the crowd towards Jake. The bodies part for her to slip through easily except for the one woman who was currently trying to dry hump Jake. Y/N grimaced for a moment before her lips curled into a sickly sweet smile, her own version of the charming evil grin.

She wasn’t sure if Jake had noticed her yet, but if he had he had made no moves to remove the obstacle in between them. He either had his eyes closed behind the dark shades or was waiting to see what she would do.

“Sweetheart, can you hop off my boyfriend for a sec? I need to talk to the bastard.”

Her eyes began to glimmer a slight red as she watched the distress in the woman’s face grow. Y/N raised her eyebrows expectantly, still smiling, somewhat hoping the other woman would put up a fight.

“I didn’t know, I’m sorry, he didn’t say,” The stranger sputters and the demon bites back a laugh.

“Don’t worry about it, hon. Like I said, he’s a bastard.” She finishes her sentence with a wink and a light shove to the drunk woman so that she could get to Jake.

She could barely make out his eyes behind his glasses, so she took the liberty of taking them off of his face and placing them in his breast pocket. Something about the action made the skin on her neck prickle with memory, but then it was gone, distracted by Jake’s deep chuckle.

“Jealous, kid?” He tilts his head down and a little to the side so she can hear him.

“No,” She growls, getting pushed closer to Jake by the crowd, her hands landing on his chest as she tries to keep her distance but to no avail.

“It seems like my heavy bump and grind got your no-good-panties in a twist?” Further liquored up, Jake is slipping more than usual and wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her impossibly close.

He had liked having a body close on the dance floor, but now that it was hers he was even happier. She could feel it.

“No, you absolute old man,” She groans, but can’t help the flutter of her eyelids towards Jake’s neck in all its sweat-glistening glory, now up close and personal.

“Says the demon who said ‘neato’ when I showed her how to use her television properly.”

“One time!” She shot back. “We’re getting off track. I stomped over here for a reason.”

“Because you want a piece of this action,” Jake nodded his head and chewed on the inside of his cheek, smirking at her.

Her nails dig into Jake’s chest and he quiets.

“Is this hell?” She hisses, eyes crazed.

“Pardon?”

“Is. This. Hell. Is this my secret punishment, men who have sex with me and then won’t touch me again. A mundane life, tormented by you two and some unknowable question of who I am.” She repeats her idea. “Am I being punished?”

Jake chuckles and swings her body around, scooping her off of her feet and taking them in a half circle. “Absolutely not. I would never agree to being a punishment demon. I’m way too old for that, I’m an Earth demon I promise.”

“But what if you’re just saying that so I won’t figure out that this is a fake earth? Or what if this is indeed Earth and I still was sent back as punishment and you’re lying?” She prods, poking her fingers into Jake’s skin.

He frowns, realizing how serious she was about this. His hands slide down to her hips, stilling the half-hearted dancing they’d been doing. “For real?”

She hums, mulling it over again. “Yeah. I need you to prove it somehow or else I’m ringing head office to say something about you and Josh’s alliance because, I swear, this is all fake.”

“Fuck,” He breathes. He yanks at one of her hands and immediately whisks them out onto the street.

Out on the dark pathway, the crowds of people seem to dissipate and gray, Jake’s doing. He was muting out the rest of the world so that he could focus on the problem that Y/N was becoming.

“You’re serious.” It’s not so much a question as a confirmation.

“Yes.”

“Well, how am I supposed to convince you it’s real?” He sounds annoyed but also a little desperate.

She scans his face, his brows furrowed and jaw clenched. At least he seemed genuinely disturbed by this situation. Maybe she was overreacting, maybe this all was just her brain trying to cope with everything that had happened in her life and death. Her mind was trying to rationalize a world that clearly wasn’t rational and it all felt like it was imploding because she was hitting a milestone. She felt more human than she ever felt her first 27 years on Earth.

Her intensity washed out of her, a doused fire simmering to a fizzle. Jake saw it in the droop of her arms and the way she dropped eye contact with him, instead scanning her feet that scuffed at the ground.

“Maybe I’m just sad on my stupid fucking birthday,” She says and Jake huffs, with a roll of his eyes.

“You can’t be serious,” Jake fires up. “You dragged me out of there because you’re sad on your birthday? You’re a fucking demon, just forget about it.” He had tried being nice, but the feeling of a heart attack that had come over him when she had said she’d call the head office had sent him into a desperate state. To have her so quickly blow it all off, summing it up to birthday blues. She was ridiculous.

“I want to go home, Jake.”

“You’re a fucking pest.” He spits.

“Fuck you,” She practically screams and turns to walk away. Jake’s hand grips her wrist and she tries to yank it free. “Let me go.”

“Stop. Okay, just stop. For one fucking second.”

She huffs and turns to Jake. His eyes are more of an orange than yellow right now and she’s not sure what that means. His hands move to her forearms and she can feel how tight his grip is on her, it scares her a little.

“Don’t ever,” He pauses, either for emphasis or to collect himself. “Scare me like that for some no good, stupid reason. Do you understand me?”

“Yeah, whatever…fuckin’ altar boy bitch.” She grumbled, moving to push past Jake. In an instant, she isn’t pushing past him down the street, instead into the dim hallway of his home. “What the…”

His hand was around her throat in an instant. He’d taken their impending fight to somewhere more private. She would’ve been impressed if she wasn’t so angry with him. His hand was forcing her to meet his eyes as he spoke slowly.

“I think you’re mad at me.” His eyes boring into hers. “Why are you mad, Sal? Because I was doing your job better than you? Can’t get it up anymore for evil after you got touched by an angel?” He keeps talking as she tries to yank away from his hold again. It felt like he was slipping into a demonic trance. “I think that’s your problem. Went and got fucked by an angel, he left and now you’re all mushy. Get over it. That’s not who you are”

Voice strained with the pressure on her neck, she hisses. “Why are you being such an asshole?”

He shrugs as if the question rolled off his back like water. He never answered her questions and it made her want to scream.

“I know how to deal with a brat when I see one, kid. And I know you, you’re a huge fucking brat when you don’t get what you want.”

She tried to shake off his grasp and Jake put more pressure on her skin. She fought back the moan in her throat. The pressure of his hands and his body, hard against her, paired with his harsh words – however she hated hearing them, sent spirals of electricity through her body. She wanted Jake and she missed Josh and she wished she’d never been sent here, but this was a perfect mixture of pain and pleasure.

“I think you were just pissed I didn’t have my attention all on you. That’s why we had to tear out of there. You wanted me to grab you by the hips and grind against you all night. Because you’re sad.” He pauses, inhaling her scent, eyes flickering to their usual sinister yellow. The fear and anger was intoxicating to him, just a little. “It’s not my fucking fault…”

She mumbles something out in a hoarse whisper.

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.” His grip loosens only slightly.

“Slut,” she repeats louder. “You were being a slut and it was embarassing. I think you loved it though. All those girls fawning over you, wanting me to want it. You were trying to make me jealous. Even though you always say never again, you still want it.”

Jake laughs cruelly, his nose trailing along the exposed skin of her jaw. “I can’t help it that they throw themselves at me. That last one was relentless, huh?”

The flicker of avoidance in her eyes catches Jake’s attention and like the demon he is, he zoned in on the hole in her armor. There was a sliver of truth in what Jake had been spouting for the last few minutes of this odd dance between fighting and foreplay.

He pressed closer and she fought back another moan. Jake took note of the way her legs shifted though and he knew.

He hummed, savoring the victory he knew he’d already gotten. “Did she get under your skin? How she was pressed up against me, writhing as if I already had my aching cock inside her rather than nestled between her pert ass cheeks? The tiniest jean shorts…”

She felt him against her thigh, throb and her eyes shut. Jake yanked at her hair with his other hand and flipped her around, assuming the position he had just described. His one hand was still at her throat and the other trailed down her back to press at her hip, keeping him close.

He put his lips to her ear. His breath was hot against her skin. Hot and insistent. Demonic. This was what he was at the end of the day. Who they both were. No matter how much he might want to change, old habits die hard.

“You know we could go back?” His tone is teasing, sinful. “Could fingerfuck you right in front of her if that’d make you feel better. Just to show her I’ve already got a play thing.”

She tried to keep her mouth shut. Saying everything she wanted to scream at him in her head.

She couldn’t help that she pressed back into him and Jake laughed again. “Fuck, you need it, yeah? My angel of a brother can’t give it to you like this, huh?” His grip tightens and she sputters out an expletive. “He ran off because of you, isn’t that right? He hated it so much.

“Shut up, Jake.” She gets out, her eyes frantically switching to black, pulling on any power that might help right now.

“I wouldn’t speak to me like that,” he warns, rocking his hips against hers. “Go to my room.”

She rolls her eyes, breath heaving when he releases his hold on her finally. She hates that he knows she’ll listen. She curses him as he watches her with a smugness in his jaw and complete arousal in his pants.

“I hate you,” She spits one last time.

“Yeah, right.” He smirks with a shake of his head.

She tried not to think about Josh as she sauntered to Jake’s room. How similar and yet how different he was to his demon counterpart. The sick notion (even as a demon, she thought it might be too far) that passed through her head of what it might be like to have them at the same time. Two sets of hands, two mouths, two of the same…and she knew they were oh so similar. She fell back onto his bed and wished Josh would appear, to offer his grace to this turbulent chase.

“What’re you thinking about in that evil head of yours, little one?” Jake appears in the doorway, his voice calmer now. She riled him up in ways he had never thought possible.

“Nothing.”

“I can make you tell me, you know that.”

She rolled her eyes, watching Jake crawl across the bed to her. His face was in her neck the moment he was close enough and she felt the drag of his teeth down the fragile skin.

“Don’t make me put you in your place.” He murmurs, his tongue flicking against her.

“How’re you gonna do that, oh powerful one?” After a moment's respite, she was feeling like taking some of the power back. With his hand no longer around her neck, she didn’t feel so trapped.

Jake chuckled darkly and then growled, “Watch.”

“I thought I was just your mentee and you were my mentor. Where'd that—Ow! Oh,” she paused at the feeling in her throat that had hurt but was quickly turning to ecstasy. “Fuckkk…Jake, what’re you–doing? Oh fuck!”

His teeth had sunk into her skin and she felt something hot and sticky rushing down her body. She gulped, gasping for air as she began to writhe and moan with no stimulation apart from whatever Jake was doing to her neck. He was moaning against her now too, with licks and slurps to the fresh open wound on her.

“Tell me what you were thinking,” he repeats when he pulls back, drops of dark inky blood racing down his chin as he stares at her with his yellow eyes tinged red. “Or I’ll drain you.”

“You wouldn’t,” she gasped, voice choppy. “You can’t! They’ll call you down for a trial before the dark council, for sure.”

“You’re right. Maybe I’d get some straight answers on who you are then,” Jake grins and some of his teeth are sharper than she’s ever seen. His fingers are at her thighs again, teasing. “But I’ll bring you so close to the edge that you’ll tell me what you’re thinking because you’re so weak from the terrible mix of pleasure and pain and maybe then some. Wouldn’t you rather just tell me now so we can save the recovery period and I can fuck you into next week instead?”

There’s a moment of silence. Her mind racing and attempting some sort of coherency with the head rush Jake drinking her blood had just caused. A mix of desire and pain and surprise and fear and hot, heady ecstasy.

“You and Josh. Both,” she manages to choke out.

Jake’s response is immediate, his eyes still staring into hers. “Absolute fucking slut,” Jake laughs. It’s almost painful in its sound. “It’s incredible they didn’t just make you a succubus…Now that wasn’t so hard was it.”

“Jake…”she whined, the slick of the blood on her throat was drifting down her chest.

He leaned down at her voice and lapped at it, then he ran a hand gently over the wound, effectively closing it right back up.

“Good as new,” He whispers, his voice soft and private. Completely different than moment’s ago. Knowing Jake was like experiencing constant whiplash. Exciting, but dangerous.

Her legs shift as Jake’s knee presses against her heat. He smiles, teeth no longer as sharp as they were. More a man than a monster visually, but now she was certain she’d never forget the animal inside him. Enticing as it was.

“Alright alright. You want me to fill this pussy, yeah?” His fingers slipped beneath the fabric of the panties that still covered her. He had magicked away all of their clothes except under garments when he’d first slid over her and she’d barely registered it.

“Fuck it so good you forget all about my brother? How’s that?” His fingers play between her quivering slit, messy with her wetness. He hums, middle finger wandering to prod at her entrance that was throbbing to the sound of his voice. “Yeah you want that I can tell.”

She whined, completely at the mercy of his hands, barely aware of the actual words he spoke and just riding the sweet current of his gruff voice. The most perfect timbre. It made her nipples peak and her legs spread wider. She just wanted him to consume her.

Effectively, she has forgotten about Josh and she can barely compare this Jake to the first time she had him. It’s like they were two completely different people. Tonight, she was lost in Jake in unfamiliar ways. His scent encased her. Sweat and fire burning. Still a little bit of nickel in the air from her blood, she tasted it on his tongue.

As his fingers opened her up, he thrusted into her thigh, wanting to sink into her. She moaned at the feeling of him hot and hard against her. Her hands grabbing at his shoulders as his lips laid brazen kisses across her healed neck and heaving chest. Jake brought her to the edge a few times, making her scream and shake before he gave in to what they both truly wanted.

His cock was just as beautiful as she remembered. Thick and heavy as it gleamed between their bodies. Jake’s eyes caught hers as she stared and he smirked, leaning forward to drag it through her folds while she watched. The sound of her slickness fell over their ears, mixing with heavy breathing. She shook slightly at the sensation of the head dragging over her sensitive clit and she whimpered when Jake prodded it against her entrance.

“Good fucking girl,” He groaned as he slid in.

She moaned his name back and he gifted a sweet kiss to her lips. One of the first tonight. He began to thrust in and out steadily. The slick sound between them only growing. A red light flickered around them as he sped up. Her fingers gripped tighter against his clammy skin, nails digging in and leaving jagged lines. He groaned at the pain, pushing harder.

Their breathing melded, their bodies working in tandem. He’d grow close and slip out of her, making her whine and then he’d move to another position he remembered her enjoying. She wished he’d speak more. He’d grown quiet, heaving, stuttering breaths, some of the only sounds leaving him since he’d entered her.

She knew he was close when he brought her back to missionary. Thrusting faster, breathing more erratic than before. His voice seemed to have come back to him as he babbled. “Swear you’ve got a magic pussy. So wet and perfect,” he sighed. “My cock wants to live here, Sal.”

She moaned in response but something felt off. Jake was cumming in seconds causing her to tighten with his release, an orgasmic cloud fogging her mind. Forgetting what she was disturbed by for a few minutes as they basked in the afterglow.

Jake rolled off of her and touched his fingers against the edge of his sheets, lightly singed. That was new. Their breathing evened and she felt herself curl into Jake’s side. His hand came to her shoulder protectively.

Her voice comes out as a whisper, “Don’t call me that again.”

“What?” Jake racks his brain for the names he had called her, wondering which one had been too far.

“Sal.” She responds calmly, her body feeling light, except that one nagging feeling. “I don’t think that’s my name.”

lmk what you think!

Taglist: @ofthecaravel @gretavanfreaky @sinarainbows @jaketlove @mysticalstarcatcher @whiterosekiszka @sacredjake @beingextraisfun @malany-gvf @joshysgirl @ascendingtothestarssasone @amygvf13 @myownparadise96 @josh-iamyour-mama @alwaysonthemend @lvnterninthenight @thecoldwind @thetroublegetssoloud71

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gretavangroupie · 9 months ago

Text

The Ripe and The Ruin - (Chapter 1)

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x Reader, OC x Reader

Word Count: 14.3k

Warnings: Language, Alcohol, Smoking, Angst, Unwelcome Advances, Kissing.

Find the Playlist Here: Apple Music | Spotify

A new series in collaboration with my talented co-writer @gretavanmoon.

"Like all good fruit, the balance of life is in the ripe and ruin."

JAKE POV

You absentmindedly swirl the skinny black straw around in your glass, scoffing to yourself as you wonder why the bartender put a stirrer into your Whiskey in the first place. It didn’t need to be stirred. You took it straight. It was fine on its own. Regardless, you sipped around the straw, letting the oaky liquor trickle down the back of your throat.

It wasn’t that you hated flying. It was more that you hated being alone with your thoughts for extended periods of time. Only your phone or a book to occupy your brain, but you knew that only worked for so long. Eventually you’d be left alone to tumble down into those dark, dusty memories that would torment you until you touched down in whatever city you were slated to be in that day.

You hear Josh’s voice, instinctively causing you to turn your head, watching as he and Daniel stand in front of the camera recording whatever video the social media team planned for the day. You gracefully bowed out of that process all together, the team knowing not to approach you about an idea unless they knew it was something you would agree to. Usually though, it wasn’t. You turn to look at Sam on your right, seeing his gaze fixed upon the two of them. Both of you were now watching them as they played along with the skit, a huff of secondhand embarrassment sizzling through you as you sip from your glass. You’d never be caught dead doing that.

Fools. How is anyone ever supposed to take us seriously if all we show them is this?

“You ready for another few months of this shit?” you mumble, your lips barely parting from the edge of your glass.

Sam snickers as he turns back to you. “No. But that’s the job isn’t it?” he answers, swallowing down a gulp of beer, turning to look at you.

“I’m hitting that wall, too.” you answer, meeting the eyes of his girlfriend, Lyla. She sends you a sympathetic look as she squeezes Sam’s arm, giving him the little bit of reassurance he needs. “S’been a shit few weeks.”

Sam doesn’t say anything, instead pursing his lips together and slowly nodding his head as he peers down into his empty glass. Everyone knows better than to indulge you in your misery at this point, vowing not to pick at the festering wound. It’s still fresh and you’re still too volatile.

“Well, we’re going to your happy place, right?” Lyla asks with a hopeful smile.

“Yeah, yeah we are,” you answer, taking another long pull of Whiskey. It was clear she didn’t know the reason it made you happy in the first place was because of the memories you made there with the person no longer around.

You turn your head ready to fall into those memories you’ve been pushing away for weeks, but fate has other plans as you spot your production team walking towards the boarding gate. They look frantic as they talk to each other, their eyes flicking up and down from their phones in their hands. Paul, your band Manager leads the group, finally slipping his phone into his pocket as he spots the gate. Next to him is Corrine, the Production Manager talking on the phone, balancing it between her ear and shoulder as she follows Paul. Wes, the Tour Manager continues to talk to Paul as they step into the waiting area, but behind him is someone you don’t recognize.

She’s looking down at her phone, unaware that Wes has come to an abrupt stop in front of her. She runs into him just enough that it gets his attention, a profuse apology falling from her mouth. You laugh a little at the exchange, wondering who this girl is, and why she is with your team. She’s dressed like the rest of them, casual, but still comfortable for a day of travel. A slouchy white long sleeve shirt, a little too thin for the cold January weather, a brown leather backpack, worn and well loved, and a pair of olive green pants that hug her ass just a little too well for 10AM on a Thursday morning. You find yourself unable to pull your eyes away from her, a magnetizing feeling sucking you in the longer you look at her. She laughs with Wes, a bright smile lighting up her face causing an unwelcome twinge in your chest. It’s when she fully turns though, allowing you to see her whole face through the curtain of tousled waves, that you find yourself needing to know who she is.

You swallow nervously, licking your bottom lip as you turn to Sam. “Who uh, who’s that?” you ask, nodding towards the group. “With Paul, Wes, and Corri?”

Sam turns around in his barstool, looking across the busy walkway to the group standing at the gate. “Oh, um…” he pauses, assessing the situation. “She’s with Paul, so that must be our new runner.”

“What happened to Lucy?” you ask, letting your eyes drift back to the mystery girl.

“She got engaged and moved to Scotland or some shit, I don’t remember. Ask Josh,” he laughs.

You hum, trying to remember the email thread where Paul’s new assistant was approved. What was her name…

“You know her name?” Lyla asks, looking at Sam.

Yes, Lyla. Yes.

“Um, I think it’s….Y/N. Yeah, yeah, Y/N,” he answers confidently, snapping his fingers as he speaks.

“So she’s the new Lucy…” you hum, flipping your sunglasses down over your eyes.

“Guess so. We’ll see if she can hack it,” he laughs, sliding his card to the bartender.

You turn back to look at her, this time your eyes concealed. She is rocking back and forth on her feet, looking around as she hugs her arms across her chest. She seems nervous, pushing her hair behind her ears every few minutes. You’re positively taken by her, unable to peel your eyes away from her every move. You can’t help but study her, and you briefly wonder if it's the alcohol rushing through your brain that has you so focused on her.

The gate agents’ voice blaring through the intercom system snaps you from your thoughts, announcing that your flight was ready to begin boarding. You look to Sam, who is signing the check, and nod your head in silent agreement that you should head over. You toss back the rest of your Whiskey, letting out a sigh as it warms your chest. You grab your black leather backpack and sling it over your shoulders, straightening out your shirt before following Sam across the walkway to the gate. With your glasses still down, you step into the waiting area, watching people line up around you.

Josh, Ty, Mia, and Daniel appear behind you, startling you a bit as you fumble around in your pocket for your boarding pass. Their conversation is loud and grating, but you tune them out. You check your seat assignment as you move forward in the line, repeating it in your head over and over so you don’t forget it. You try not to pay attention to the pretty mystery girl five people ahead of you, but you just can’t seem to take your eyes off of her. You watch her disappear down the jet bridge as she talks to Paul, and before you can even register it, it’s your turn and the gate agent is scanning your ticket. She sends you on your way with a smile, and as you make the long walk to the plane you wonder if the girl in the green pants is going to make this tour just a little bit more interesting.

—

HER POV

3E. 3E. 3E.

Your eyes scan the row of numbers at the top of the cabin, finally catching sight of your assigned seat. You slide into the aisle seat, tossing your backpack to the floor as you let out a sigh of relief. You made it in one piece. You weren’t late, and everyone seemed to like you so far.

You take a look around you, admiring the plush seats and ample legroom. You’d never flown first class before. You felt a little out of place as you looked at the people around you. Thankfully it was filled with team members you knew, and the band members and their partners, but still you knew you didn’t belong up here. You kicked your bag beneath the seat in front of you, pulling your shirt sleeves over your hands before reaching up to adjust the air vents that were blowing far too hard. A small shiver left your body as you spun the vents closed, sitting back comfortably in your seat as you waited to see who your seat partner would be.

Your phone buzzed on your lap, a text from your best friend lighting up your screen.

Ruth

10:57am: How many hours is the flight again?

You smile as you quickly text back, running the numbers in your head.

You

10:58am: I don’t know, like 7 or 8 hours? You’ll be fine. Read a book or something. I’ll text you when I get there. But it will be late…or early? I think? There is a big time difference.

Ruth

10:59am: Ok, be careful.

You lock your phone and shove it under your leg, your eyes darting to the aisle as more people pass you on their way to their seats. You couldn’t believe your first leg of tour with them was taking you across Europe, allowing you to see places you’d only dreamed about. It wasn’t the job you were worried about, you could do that in your sleep. It was the uncertainty of being in another country with people you didn’t really know.

Getting to know the bands you worked for was a precarious thing. Always walking the thin line between friend and employee. You knew your place though, and you knew where that boundary lied. Your eyes refocus as someone stops in front of you, dropping their hands. As you look up you see Jake, one of the band members staring back at you.

“I’m…right there,” he says, gently pointing to the seat next to you.

“Oh, right here?” you ask, genuinely curious how you were seated next to a band member and not with a crew member.

“3F? That’s what this says…” he asks, checking his boarding pass. You nod and stand, letting him slide into the seat. He drops his leather backpack to the ground with a thud, letting out a sigh of relief, much in the same way you had.

You resettle in your own seat, buckling your seatbelt and pulling it tight across your lap. Your heart is still pounding as you try to calm your nerves, suddenly feeling put on the spot next to your boss. Or– your boss's boss. Shit.

You realize that you know practically nothing about this band, about its members, and really even much of their music beyond their hits. You planned to spend most of this flight acquainting yourself with them, learning their likes and dislikes before making a fool out of yourself in front of them in the green room. You don’t know if you should speak to him, and truthfully you’re a little hesitant since that day at the office, catching him and Josh in an argument.

You didn’t even know they would be there as you went in to sign your paperwork, but to your surprise they were, standing in the middle of the office playing around on instruments and talking. You made a beeline straight for the management office, mostly unseen, and quickly signed your paperwork. Paul went over some of the timelines and the things you would be responsible for as you took detailed notes on your phone, not wanting to miss a single thing.

Though, all of that came to a screeching halt as the sound of a chair skidding forcefully across the concrete floors pulled you both from your conversation. From your seat you watched through the small office door as two men moved towards each other, while two more intervened to break up whatever was about to happen.

You then learned from Paul that the two people that were arguing were the twins, Jake and Josh, and that the other two were their younger brother Sam, and their honorary brother Daniel. You observed in shock as the two of them shouted profanities at each other from either side of the piano, both red faced and worked up over something.

Paul quickly walked you out the front door with an apology and a laugh, and that was the last you saw of the band and its members, until today.

Out of the corner of your eye, you try to get a good look at him without him noticing. First impressions have always been a big deal to you, and since your first impression of him was nothing short of off-putting, you decide to try again. Give him the benefit of the doubt.

Worn-in black pants, cuffed at the ankle, a wrinkled beige button up that only conceals half his torso, a thick dark navy overcoat, and a stack of heavy silver necklaces. Oh, and blue-tinted sunglasses. His cologne… now that will be sticking around in your mind for a while. Clean, woodsy, a hint of musk but still kind of sweet.

You hear him clear his throat as he fidgets with his things, putting them all in their places as he finally settles into his seat. He reaches down into his black leather bag that appears to be well-loved, and pulls out a set of wired earbuds. They’re tangled and bunched, and you can’t help but smirk as you watch him try to untangle them. His fingers pull through the twisted white wires, and before you can offer your help, he reluctantly tosses them back down on top of his unzipped bag. “Fuck it,” you hear him mumble under his breath. He huffs again and leans back, tapping his fingers anxiously on his arm rests.

You let yourself drift back into your own thought as the plane takes off, going over the hundreds of miniscule things you know you’ll have to accomplish as soon as the plane lands. It’s quiet in first class, something you aren't used to with flying on the regular. The peacefulness that comes along with the drone of the plane and the light conversation between everyone is almost enough to help you relax a little, if not for the damned cool air still blowing through the vent above you.

You shiver a little, cuffing your hands over the ends of your shirt to pull it in more closely to your body. Why you had chosen to forgo a heavier jacket in the middle of winter, you truly don’t know. You decide to distract yourself a little, pulling up the string of endless emails that lie in waiting on your phone, getting a nice head-start on your duties before you have to hit the ground running.

Jake has been sitting beside you quietly for about an hour now, alternating scrolling his phone every few minutes and looking out his window. The cloud cover is heavy, so being able to see even a glimpse of the ocean below you is a lost cause. You listen as he sighs, crossing one of his legs over the other and folding his hands in his lap.

Should you strike up conversation? No, he probably doesn’t care to speak to you. But is it rude not to? You’ve already been sitting here for over an hour…

Just as you decide to open your mouth to speak, the plane hits turbulence. The cabin shakes and rumbles, and you can feel your stomach fall. Your hands grip the arm rests with white knuckles as the plane passes through, your eyes gripping shut as tightly as your palms on the arm rests.

Finally, after what feels like forever the plane evens out again, and you hear the pilot come over the intercom to apologize. You finally let the breath you were holding free from your lungs, and you open your eyes to see Jake with his head leaned low in front of you.

“You okay?” he asks, an eyebrow cocked.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. Just…don’t really enjoy this part much.” you admit, running your sweaty palms over your pants.

He sits back in his seat once he notices your calmness return. “Me neither, to be honest. No matter how many times you hit turbulence on a plane, you never get used to it. I don’t care what people say.” he says with a sweet smile. You can tell that he was coming down from an anxious episode just the same as you.

“No joke…” you agree, suddenly wanting a drink even if it was before noon. You push the tiny hairs away from your face as you regain a hold on your bearings, picking up right where you had left off before the turbulent air sent you into a spiral of doom. “I–I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself before, my name’s–”

“Y/N.” he cut in, extending the tips of his fingers out to offer you a friendly handshake.

You let your hand slowly come up to meet his, suddenly uncaring that it was probably still clammy. “Yeah, that’s me. It’s nice to meet you.”

For the five seconds your bodies connect, and the even shorter few seconds that his honey brown eyes meet yours, you feel like you were worried for nothing. This guy is nice. Maybe he’ll be easier to talk to than you thought…

His hand disconnects and flies to his chest. “I’m Jake.”

You nod. Of course you already know his name. “Yeah, um…guitar. Right?”

He smiles harder this time. “Yup. That’s my forte, at least. Have you um, ever been to Europe?” He brushes his hand over his nose a few times as his eyes dart back and forth from the seat behind you and back to your face, unable to hold eye contact. Is he nervous?

You turn your body a little more toward him. “No, actually. This is my first time. But I hear good things…”

“Oh shit, you’re gonna love it. Especially this time of year. Things move pretty fast when we get there, but we always try to explore as much as possible. See some sights.” You can tell that he’s truly excited about this excursion, and to be completely honest, you found yourself wanting to hang on his every word.

“Anything in particular?” you press, wanting to hear the gritty rich sound of his voice again.

You let him talk on and on about the places he wants to see, and the places that they had already been, even bringing up a few older photos on his phone as he describes their past trips. You try not to look as he scrolls, but his camera roll is full of tons of scenic photos and videos, landscapes, mountains, waterfronts… and of course a few rogue photos of guitars and guitar parts. You wonder if he’s planning to make little vlogs.��

“Italy is my favorite, I think. So much history there. I could’ve stayed for six months if they’d have let me.” Your shoulders are pressed up against each others’ now as you watch his thumb glide over the multitude of media, speeding through the less important ones to get to his favorites. Strange of him to trust a stranger this much to watch him scroll his personal camera roll. He obviously doesn’t have much to hide, even if this is crossing that boundary line…

“The people are great, the food is great, the wine, oh god, don’t get me started on the wine…” he chuckles, and you feel yourself bumping your shoulder against his a little as you laugh along with him. “The terroir is fuckin’ phenomenal, obviously. It’s like a different world.”

“I like a moscato every now and then.” You add, trying to throw in your two cents on your crumbs of wine knowledge.

He returns with a scrunched nose. “Hmm, a bit sweet for my taste…So, Y/N. What’s your story, how’d you end up with us?” he asks, switching to cross his other leg over, now.

You swallow, unsure of how to explain years’ worth of ups and downs you’d gone through to a rockstar. Your boss. You decide to keep it short and sweet, he didn’t need to know everything.

“Well, I spent my entire youth attending a small private school and private high school, so I came up quite the determined and disciplined kid. Kinda sheltered.” You turn again in your seat, tucking one leg up underneath you. “But, I ended up moving away from home and away from family, been in this business for almost, eh, six years now?” You go on, and he listens intently. “Guess you could say I’m a pro at making things happen out of thin air.” You give him a long wink as you snap your fingers together.

His eyebrows shoot up, and he finally gives you a hundred-watt smile. My god, he’s…

“A-ha, so you got all the good hookups, huh?” He asks, running his fingers over his chin as his cheeks turn the palest shade of pink.

“S’what the runner does, isn’t it?” You pull your eyes back down to your lap. “Get you everything you need, right when you need it?”

You bring your eyes back up to his and watch as he swallows hard, his mouth hanging open for just a split second before he catches himself. “Yeah, ehm, I suppose it is. We’re not too bossy, though. Josh can be, but.”

“So I’ve heard, he’s kind of a…diva?” You hadn’t done too much research on them, honestly. You hadn’t had the time. But, what few tiktoks and musics videos you had managed to see were fairly telling of their personalities.

“He is. He is.” Jake laughs. “Don't let him fool you, though. He’s a big softie with an attitude problem. We all kind of are, honestly.”

“You’re a softie?” You press with a teasing tone. “From the few videos I’ve seen of you playing guitar, you look a little intimidating…”

“Me? Intimidating?” He clicks his tongue. “Don’t believe everything you see on the internet, Y/N. It’s dangerous…” he growls the last word, and you can feel your insides ripping themselves apart just at the sound of his voice. You have to pull back, now.

“All the runners we’ve ever had did extensive research on us before they came on tour, did you not do that?” he inquires, throwing you off a bit.

You don’t really know how to answer, so you tell the truth. “Honestly Jake, no, I didn’t. I’ve toured with a few other bands in my career, and I did that. I researched them, learned all things I thought I needed to know so I didn’t go in blind. And, this time around, I did a little bit, but I kind of wanted to meet you all for myself. Get my own versions of you.”

“Hm.” He responds with an understanding nod. “Well, you’ll be the first.”

“Speaking of,” you go on, candidly glancing around the cabin and deciding to go ahead and ask the question that’s been nagging you. “Everyone else is seated with someone, wonder why I’m not with the rest of the team.”

“What, you don’t wanna sit by me, Y/N?” he asks with a shred of a grin.

“No no, it’s not that.” you laugh. “Just—“

“Normally I have someone with me, but…we’ve recently…gone our separate ways, I suppose.” He trips over the words a little, stammering through them like it was the first time he’d admitted it.

“Oh… I see.” you pause, “That’s…never an easy thing.”

I wonder if that was why he was so snippy that day at the office when you saw him fall off his rocker?

“Eh, s’alright. Win some, lose some. We had a good run.” He says as he waves off the question. “So, you say you’ve been doing this awhile, you must really miss whoever you’re leaving at home.”

Skating around the question, aren’t you, Jake?

“No, I’m single, if that’s what you’re asking.” You bite your lip as he doesn’t stop you from elaborating further. “I’m pretty independent, I like structure and uniformity. Growing up I wasn’t allowed much time on my own to have hobbies outside of school and practice. Strict parents. The job has kept me pretty adhered to that mindset, even in my personal life, so.”

His eyes flick to yours and he squints them a little, as if he’s collecting every single one of your words and hanging them in a closet in his mind. He’s trying his best to figure you out, you can see it on his face. But why? He shouldn’t care…you don’t matter.

“I can respect that.” He nods again. “My brothers and I, we grew up in a fairly religious household. Was great, don’t get me wrong. Really formed our roots but, as we got older and started to see the world, we kinda got away from it. Began to start seeing things in a different perspective.” He sucks his teeth, as if he’s recounting a hard memory. “Kinda why we moved to Nashville. We knew we had to break away if we wanted the band to be successful.”

You nod in understanding. “I mean, it worked, didn’t it?”

His laugh fills the cabin as it bounces off the walls, a sweet chuckle that makes your heart rate pick up. You could listen to him laugh all day long.

“S’pose it did.”

“The fuck are you two over here laughing at, huh?” Suddenly Josh’s curls are squished between your seats, his cheeks pinched together as he speaks. “I’m trying to get some shut-eye but I can’t from all the babbling—”

Jake places his hand over entirety of his twin’s face, pressing him through and back into his own seat. “None of your business, fuck off.”

You laugh at their antics, knowing in the back of your mind that you had better get used to it. You feel the air kick on again, fiercely blowing the freezing cold air directly onto you. You shiver a little, balling yourself up and pulling your sleeves closely in toward you again.

“You want my jacket?” Jake asks, already starting to pull it from his shoulders.

“No! No no no, thank you, but I’m fine, really.” The last thing you need is that right off that bat. A bad look. Day one. Nope.

“Seriously, I run naturally hot. Take it.” He replies.

“Oh yeah? Hence all your layers?” You tease, repositioning in your seat.

“It’s a fashion statement, thank you very much.” He bites. “All about comfort for me.”

Gotta change the subject.

“So tell me something I should know about your brothers. Something that would give me brownie points if I wanted to say…impress them with my craft service skills…” you press, giving him a new challenge.

“Wow um, let’s see…” he brings his fingers to his chin and thinks hard, and you can’t help but feel endeared by the fact that he truly wants to help you out. “Josh stays away from chocolate and dairy and sweets and all that, but his guilty pleasure is those cotton candy flavored grapes. Weird, I know.”

“Oh my god, those are so nasty!” you laugh, but still take note.

“Danny would be over the moon if you surprised him with salsa verde Doritos, and Sam drinks kombucha more than the normal human should.” he finishes with a stern nod.

“Got it. I think I can make most of that happen, aside from the grapes…”

“He would kiss you right on the lips, I’m telling you.” Jake giggles again, and you notice how he lights up when he talks about them.

“So Josh is the dramatic softie, what about the other two?” you ask.

“Sam’s kinda serious but he’s playful when he wants to be. Sneaky, too. Daniel’s always into something, always busy. Man doesn’t like to sit still,” he concludes, and you commit it all.

“And what about you?” you ask, feeling your stomach flip for some reason.

“I thought you said you wanted to get your own versions of us,” he quipped back, parroting your words from earlier. Damn, you had said that.

You toss your hair behind your shoulder. “I did but…You’ll tell me all about them, but not about yourself?”

He crunches his lips together as his eyes scan your face. It makes you a little uncomfortable, how hard he’s really looking at you, but you let him. Stopping him would be a sin you weren’t ready to commit just yet.

“That’s right.”

The two of you drift off into silence again as the minutes tick by, thankfully not being embarrassingly interrupted by Josh anymore. You decide that you want to listen to some music, so you reach into the pocket of your bag and pull out your AirPods, slipping the left one in first followed by the right. You pull up your music and begin flipping through your playlists, searching for something to match the relaxed tone of the hour. Truly, you feel like you could easily drift off to sleep.

You find a nice quiet playlist and curl up in your seat, halfway reluctant you didn’t take Jake’s jacket, but also proud of yourself for saying no. You’re fucking freezing.

You turn your head to the side and close your eyes, ready to drift off into another world.

You’re jolted awake by turbulence, the plane shaking again as you wake up and get your bearings. “Shit,” you breathe as you sit up straighter, remembering exactly where you are. You notice that in your slumber, your head had fallen against Jake’s shoulder. Fuck. Fuck fuck.

The turbulence only lasts a few seconds before it evens out again, and the calmness returns to your body. You glance at Jake, seeing him looking a little drowsy and shaken, too.

“Jake, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that, why didn’t you wake me? I—”

“Hey, don’t worry about it. I kinda dozed off, too,” he replies, stretching his arms high above his head without a care…not like he didn’t just have a stranger asleep with her head on his shoulder.

You look down, noticing that in the time you had drifted off, Jake had covered you with his coat.

You panic, scrambling a little as you work to pull it from your body before anyone notices.

His hands are quickly on yours, stopping your action. “Leave it, Y/N. You were shivering in your sleep…you can’t tell me you aren’t cozy right now…” his voice is barely a whisper, and the warmth of his hands grazing overtop of yours, even for a second, is enough to give you a whole other type of chill.

“Yeah, I—I am warm…” you can’t deny that your body temperature has increased by at least a couple of degrees, and your fingers don’t feel like they’re going to get frostbite anymore. The jacket is heavy, heavier than it looks, and it smells like fresh pine needles and woodsy body soap. Just like…him?

“See?” he growls, backing away. “Just stay put.”

Stay put? You want to bite back with something that will put him in his place; you explicitly told him you didn’t want his jacket, and he covered you anyway. While you were unconscious. While you couldn’t turn down the offer.

…But you’re so warm, now. Your tense muscles are finally relaxing. The frigidity of the space has suddenly turned into a toasty furnace with a crackling fire.

Okay, but just until we land…

“What are you listening to?” Jake asks as he stretches again. You turn your phone for him to see, showing a generic playlist of Peaceful Sleep Songs lighting up your lock screen.

“Agh, no, what is that shit?” Jake snatches your phone from your hand, quickly flipping the screen to unlock with your face before he begins shuffling through your playlists.

“What are you doing?!” you yelp, reaching for your phone back. He raises his free hand to the air, stopping you from taking it.

“Aht aht… I’m finding you something better to listen to. Don’t worry about it.” You suddenly hear the quiet music in your ears switch to something else, something you knew for a fact you hadn’t ever heard before. You give it a second as he turns the volume up a few notches, and you realize that it is most definitely brand new to you.

It’s a solemn, tense-feeling piano beat, followed in by guitar. Lyrics only come in after a minute and a half or so. It sounds like growling, deep and hollow and a bit scary, but beautiful nonetheless. He’s watching your face as you experience it, quickly pressing pause as the song comes to a close.

“What was that?” you ask, realizing you had really enjoyed it.

“That was a song called Intro, by Alt-J. I know you’ve heard of Alt-J.” he says as he goes back to work on the phone.

You slowly shake your head from side to side. “Can’t say I have, actually.”

His jaw goes slack as his eyebrows raise in disbelief. “What? Like, never?”

You feel your cheeks turning pink at the thought of a literal rockstar calling you out on your lack of music knowledge.

“I don’t think so! That’s not what I normally listen to…don’t judge me,” you laugh, reaching for your phone again.

He swats your hand away. “Ohh no, little fledgling. You’re listening to this. This is the good shit…” he presses play again as a twinkling high-pitched voice comes through your ears. It’s just jumbled words, no backing music or tune. The acapella strikes you as strange at first, until the end when it changes tone a bit, and it’s almost as if the lyrics are giving you advice you didn’t ask for. Warning you of something new and exhilarating, or better yet, dangerous and foreboding. It almost feels as if a black cloud has overcome you, only for a split second, letting you feel the nonexistent pokes and pinches that come along with the emotion of worry.

The song flows directly into another now, one layered with a lot more sound, and it pulls you from that odd headspace the previous had put you in. You lean over the armrest, looking at the screen to see the title Tessellate. You’ve never heard anything like this kind of music before, and you wonder why Jake chose this particular artist.

“This is one of their more popular ones, like radio popular, but it’s still one of my favorites on this album. Here in a second you’ll hear it slow down—”

You stop him by pulling your right earbud out, shoving it in his hand. “Shh, you can talk me through the songs later. Let me listen.”

He shuts his mouth, giving you a sweet grin as he takes the bud, placing it in his own ear and pressing play again. You continue on through the album, each song something brand new to you, a genre you’d really never delved into but wish you had, now. It’s enthralling, different, and full of sounds that make your mind sway and swim through mixtures of color and gray.

You watch as Jake’s fingers tap along exactly with the beat of each song perfectly, down to a tee. The words don’t make much sense to you, and you can hardly distinguish what the singer is saying, but you know that Jake will give you a rundown of it all as soon as time allows him. You don’t know much about him, but his persistence is already apparent. You glance to see his eyelashes hitting his cheeks, his head barely bobbing side to side as he feels the music. You find yourself envious that he can draw inspiration and act on it, turning it into art of his own, whereas all you can do is sit back and listen to it.

Every couple of minutes he perks up from his meditation and adds new songs from their other albums onto the little playlist he’s started for you. You can’t quite make out what he’s titled it, but you can tell it's an emoji of some sort. His thumb flips and flies with precision across your screen as he scrolls and adds songs, and you have to admit, you’re a little excited to get your phone back and learn just what he’s creating for you. Especially for you.

You take a quick deep breath as you recenter yourself, catching your eyes drifting over his hand as he grips your phone. The veins in his hand roll over his knuckles, and you can just barely see the scuffed and calloused ends of his fingertips. Dial it the fuck back Y/N, remember the rules.

“Oooh, this is another one of my favorites,” he remarks, his mouth fairly close to your ear as he tries not to raise his voice over the volume of the music. He turns the screen a little so you can see the title, Taro. “You haven’t— You didn’t come to any of our shows last year by chance, did you?”

You feel a big pang of guilt shoot through your chest, remembering that you had actually been invited by some friends to see them way back when, but you’d turned the invitation down, not knowing who they even were at the time. You shake your head from side to side. “No, I didn’t.”

“This is one of the ones we play to the crowd before we go on. We all love it, it’s a sad, sad love tale based on true events. That’s the cool thing about this group, their lyrics are never really about what you think they are. They’re storytellers, a bit like Josh is, if you think about it. Their themes and over arcs are just…mind blowing sometimes.” Jake’s voice is a tiny murmur in your ear as your shoulders lean on one another’s again, still very taken with the music flowing through your ear. “We grab a lot of inspo from them, sonically and melodically…” You can feel his breath on your cheek, and you find yourself wondering what it would taste like…

“Here, read along with the lyrics. Try not to cry.” He hands your phone back, letting you keep up with the words floating down your screen. And he’s right, it’s heartbreaking without even knowing the context.

“Wow…That was really beautiful,” you choke, realizing the depth of the story of the song.

“Yep. Good shit, I told you.” He whips his hand around and takes the phone back as the next song comes in and warms your bones up again. You can feel the bare skin of his elbow brushing against yours, realizing that he was telling the truth about being naturally warm-bodied. Suddenly you don’t feel so bad about cuddling up under his coat.

He opens your contacts app and adds himself, placing the sword emoji beside his name. He smirks as he hands the phone back.

“Added your phone number, huh?” you ask rhetorically.

He sucks his teeth as he cracks his fingers. “Yep. How else will I let you know what I might need? Plus, never know when you might need to call me.”

—

You watch the signs overhead illuminate, a gentle tone ringing through the cabin as the Captain starts to make an announcement. You pause the song and pull your AirPod out, watching Jake do the same.

“Hey folks, this is your Captain speaking. Just want to let you know we will be landing in Hamburg shortly. I’d expect to be on the ground in the next ten minutes or so, putting us about fifteen minutes ahead of schedule, so sit tight and we’ll have you on the ground in a few. Attendants please prepare for arrival.”

You turn to look at Jake, shrugging as you slide your AirPod back into the case. He raises his eyebrows and drops his jaw. “But we aren’t done! Wait! Hold on!”

He grabs your phone again, and from what you can see he is adding more songs to your playlist. You watch as he scrolls through various different albums by different artists, adding songs as quickly as he can. You smirk as you catch sight of the emoji he’s chosen, the chick icon, a playful nod at his earlier fledgling comment. He peeks over at you every few seconds, trying his best to hurry so you can pack up your things, but in a last effort you watch as he adds himself as a collaborator to the playlist.

You raise an eyebrow to him as he hands your phone back to you, shrugging with a soft laugh. You feel your insides swirl at the sight of his smile, and you turn your eyes to your phone scrolling through the songs on the playlist. You turn back to him and nod, a silent agreement that you will listen just as you feel the plane starting to land.

“I wanna keep adding songs for you to listen to, fledgling. If you want me to, of course…”

You nod. “Of course I do. School away, Jake,” you reply with an air of playful annoyance.

He chuckles. “I plan to.”

As you brace for the landing you grip your hands into the arm rests, letting go of the soft worn in corduroy fabric you’d been playing with for the last hour. Your eyes squint closed as the plane touches down, jolting everyone forward in their seats. Jake grabs his phone as the plane slows down, flashing his screen at you to show a local time of 12:13AM.

“I see some jet lag in our future,” you smile, sliding his jacket off of your arms. You fold it the best you can and hand it back to him, almost sad you have to give it back to him. “Thanks again for that.”

“Oh yeah, no problem.” He accepts it graciously from you, letting out a soft breath as he unfolds it and slides it back over his shoulders. It fits his personality well, soft and sturdy, worn in and weathered. He flips his hair out from beneath the collar, a barely there smell of peppermint passing through the air. You pull your gaze away from him just as you see his cheeks start to blush from your gaze. You lock your phone and stick it into your backpack at your feet, wondering how in such a short amount of time Jake has managed to infiltrate your thoughts so completely.

JAKE POV

As she turns to grab her bag you open your phone, tapping on the notification that she has added you to her playlist. You accept the invitation with a sly smile before sliding your phone back into your coat pocket. It smells like her now, soft and floral, very different than anything you were used to. Your mind was already circling with things you wanted to add to that playlist when you got a minute, finding it was harder than you thought to think of songs on the fly.

The first few rows begin to file out of the plane and you watch as Paul stands and turns to look at Y/N, motioning to her to meet up with him after she got off the plane. She nods her head and slides her backpack straps over her shoulders, waiting for her turn to stand.

“For jet lag…You know…Um, Benadryl,” you offer, your voice a little soft and unsure.

She turns to look at you, pinching her brows together in question.

“When you get to your room tonight, take a Benadryl. Should knock you out until the morning and help you get on a normal schedule. Works for me, at least.” you finish, nodding to her as the people in front of you stand to leave.

“Thanks, Jake.” She smiles and nods, sliding out of her seat to walk down the aisle.

You watch her as she walks up the jet bridge towards the gate, seeing Paul waiting for her in the doorway. The two walk together through the airport, finding it fairly quiet at this hour as most of the flights have landed for the night. You push your sunglasses down onto your nose just as you feel Josh walking up behind you.

He gives you a gentle nudge in the side to get your attention. “You good?”

“Yeah, yeah. Easy flight,” you answer, still listening and catching bits and pieces of whatever Paul is saying to Y/N, prepping her for the hotel check in and details for the morning. She is typing notes on her phone as she walks, barely looking where she is going, clearly trusting Paul to look out for her more than she should.

You tune out Josh as he rambles on about the flight, Ty jumping in every few words with a retort or a laugh. Your eyes don’t seem to leave her though, watching her talk, watching her walk, shit, just watching her. You can’t seem to shake it. You’d never met anyone like her before. Someone you were so instantly taken with. You wanted to know every single detail about her.

You feel Josh’s hand as it comes up to your chin, pressing it upward and forcing your jaw shut. “There, you seemed to have dropped that.”

You turn to him angrily, knowing what he’s insinuating, giving him a hard elbow to the arm. “Fuck off, Josh.”

He laughs and pushes you with his shoulder, readjusting his backpack on his other shoulder. “Just an observation, that’s all. Can’t say I blame you, though.”

“Oh are you talking about Jake and Y/N?” Sam interjects, stepping up on your right side in a lanky stride.

Josh nods, laughing slightly, wanting to keep this banter going. Asshole.

“Can you two knock it off, fuck,” you growl, hoping she can’t hear them. Your eyes are locked in on her again, and much to your relief she is talking to Paul and can’t hear a word they’re saying.

“He didn’t shut up the entire flight. Lots of whispering and giggles from up there. I didn’t sleep at all. But I did hear his monologue about the genius of Alt-J for the fourth time this year.” Josh quips, earning a laugh from everyone around you.

“Fuck you again, Josh,” you spit, annoyed at his lack of respect.

“Damn, so you’re trying to scare her away, then?” Sam teases, giving you a sideways grin.

You shake your head and push past them forcefully as you step off the escalator into baggage claim, not wanting to engage in this conversation a second longer. Especially because you were afraid they might be right.

—

“Shit, not again,” Danny mumbles as you all approach the baggage claim area, immediately noticing a group of fans obviously waiting for your arrival. You take a deep, preparational breath as you can’t help but run into them on your path to the carousel.

“Let’s just get it over with,” you hear Josh complain as he puts on his faux-happy face. You all love meeting fans. Truly, watching their faces light up when they see you is something that is unparalleled. But coming off of a long flight and already feeling the effects of the time difference, starving, and ready for a drink usually puts all of you in a mood that is generally irked overall. But you always suck it up; this is the life you signed up for.

This time though, unlike most encounters with fans, is enough to make your general irritation quickly turn into intense aggravation. They swarm you, hugging and pulling and invading your spaces in an extremely unwelcome attempt at meeting each of you. You feel surrounded, and unable to get to your luggage in time before it rounds the carousel again. You keep your cool, just as you always do, curtly smiling and pulling away as your body instructs you to. You pause for quick photos as your eyes search the spinning luggage again. You see your brothers out of the corners of your eyes doing the same… quick ‘hellos’ and ‘nice to meet you’s’ as the crowd just seems to get bigger and bigger.

Just as your eyes finally fall on your suitcase, you hear a loud clack as you turn and notice someone has knocked Sam’s phone out of his hand. It lands face down on the tile floor, likely cracked and scuffed from the people crowding around you all. You watch as Sam’s face turns up in annoyance, his eyes closed as he composes himself.

“Okay, that’ll be enough!” You hear Dean, your security, bellow across the crowd. “Please step away, no more photos, no more photos…” Dean makes his way into the center of group, quickly dispersing them. You give Sam a quick look that says, ‘get your phone, let’s go’, and soon enough you’re rolling your suitcase through the middle of the crowded room.

You see Y/N in the crowd, finding her to be a little flustered from the encounters, but alright nonetheless. You lock eyes with her as she mouths, ‘Are you okay?’, and you nod her off with a look of, ‘Yeah, this happens all the time.’

Your team is surrounding you as you quickly walk through the hallway toward the exit, ready to hop into an unmarked van and zip away to your hotel. You’re still being followed as you make it through the back exit doors.

When you’re finally safe outside the pickup area, everyone breathes a sigh of relief. “Fuck, that was a bad one.” Danny says. “Sam, how's your phone?”

“It’s ok, just a little scuff in the corner but it’ll be fine,” he answers, scanning his eyes over it.

“Guys, keep your phones on, Wes will be texting you tomorrow with where we’re headed next. Get some sleep and something to eat.” Paul instructs as everyone loads their things into the vans. Y/N is standing nearby, and you can tell that she feels a little out of place as she awkwardly crosses one ankle over the other. You take a quick opportunity to knock your elbow into her side, feeling comfortable enough to do that now that you’d sat together so long on the plane, but she’s avoiding eye contact. You hope she doesn’t feel uncomfortable around you.

“Hey, thanks for letting me jam a little with you on the plane,” you say sheepishly. “Sorry if I overstepped any, but I really think you’ll like the music I added for you.”

Finally her composure opens a little. “No, no! You didn’t… overstep. I’m actually excited to hop in my big cozy hotel bed and listen again.” Her words make your stomach fall with nerves, but you quickly suppress it.

“Y/N, you ready?” you hear Wes ask her as he passes by, heading toward another van.

“Yep, all set!” she answers as she follows him through the dwindling group. She hops into another van, and you worry she’ll be staying at another hotel. For a second you think you won’t see her as much if she is. You climb inside the van and slam the door closed behind you, seeing the group of fans with their phones pressed to the windows of the airport. You plop back down into the middle seat beside Josh, and finally take a full breath of relief.

“Fuck! I swear to god if I’m getting sick again…” Josh says as he bangs his head against the headrest behind him. You scoot sideways on the van’s bench seat, staying as far away from him as you can.

“Are you serious?!” Danny says from the seat behind you. “You need a mythical medicine man or some shit.”

“It’s fine, I’m fine, just feel a little congested. I’ll send Y/N out on her first mission for some meds after we get settled in the hotel.” Josh answers, and you keep yourself pressed against the van’s window, purposefully turning your back to him. Can’t have that again. You realize, though, that of course she’ll be in the same hotel as you, management always is.

The vision of a worried Y/N replays in your mind, seeing her face full of concern as the fans did all but ambush you earlier. You shake the thought, suddenly having a realization that, most likely, everyone else is having, too.

“I think we should amp up security,” you blurt. “No offense to Dean, but he’s only one guy. There are more than ten of us…” you’re met with a little bit of silence, so you press on. “Just while we’re over here, at least. We’re going to be separated a lot, and I think it would be a good idea if Dean wasn’t being pulled in all different directions.”

“Don’t you think we should have thought of that before we got over here, Jake?” Josh counters.

“I’ve actually been thinking it for a while. Today just…made me feel like it’s necessary, now,” you respond quietly. What could it hurt? You have the funds, and a few extra eyes on you and your team couldn’t be a bad thing.

You hear a collective sigh from your brothers, until Sam finally speaks. “Yeah, I kinda felt a little overwhelmed when I dropped my phone and it got kicked away from me. First world problems, I know, but—”

“But someone could have picked it up, and ran off with it. Gotten access to your private information. Stepped on it and shattered it. We’re probably just paranoid, but I don’t know. I don’t think it’s a bad idea…” you suggest.

“I like the idea.” Josh adds. “Wish we would have talked about it sooner, but I’m sure Paul could get something arranged for us. Those security companies are always looking for overseas gigs.”

“Daniel, you agree?” you ask, twisting your body to the backseat.

“Yeah, I do, actually,” he decides.

“Good. It’s settled, then. We’ll talk to Paul first thing in the morning,” you say, happy with your decision of bringing it up. All you can see is a memory of Y/N’s scared face replaying over and over in your mind, and you just can’t seem to shake it.

You quickly curse yourself, you’re in no headspace to be worrying about a woman right now. You’ve gotta keep your head on straight. Tour hasn’t even started yet, and you’re already letting a new girl give you butterflies. You audibly scoff at yourself as you lean your elbow on the window, looking out at the bustling streets outside. You throw your earbuds in, letting the tangle of cords just be what it is, and you pull your phone out to switch the volume up. Of course, Alt-J pops onto your screen the second you look at it, and you wonder if she’s already listening to them, too.

The city lights are twinkling through the light drizzle of rain, and you finally feel your bones starting to settle into tiredness. Though your mind is racing with excitement to play shows, you let yourself ignore the thoughts and relax into the music blessing your ears. Some room service and a down comforter is calling your name.

—--

HER POV

The shrill sound of your hotel room telephone wakes you from a half-sleep. What the hell? What time is it? You don’t remember falling asleep, but the loud TV and the lights still illuminating the room signify you must have accidentally dozed off.

“Hello?” you answer, realizing that no matter the time, duty calls.

“Hey, Y/N. It’s Paul. Sorry if I woke you…”

“No, you’re fine. I’m awake,” you lie.

“Cool. Um, Josh was wondering if you’d run to the pharmacy down the street and pick up the meds I just texted you. He said he would go get them himself, but he’s doing a lung steaming treatment or… something. I dunno. But if you don’t care, here’s your first assignment! I know it’s late, but the pharmacy is apparently open all night.”

You glance at your watch and see that it’s already nearing 1:00AM. “Sure! I don’t care at all. Tell him I’ll have them to him ASAP.”

“Will do. Hey, turn your location on for me and Wes, okay? Be safe, thanks again,” Paul hangs up the phone before you can say goodbye, and within seconds you’re crawling out of bed and putting your pants back on. Your stomach growls as you realize you fell asleep without eating anything. You make a plan to make a quick trip to the pharmacy, deliver Josh his medicine, then go back out to find something to eat before you end up eating the bag of peanuts you stuffed in your bag on the plane.

You take a second to check your messages, finding you have three unread messages from Ruth. In the mess and confusion of the day, and the time difference, you’ve been thrown for a loop. You shoot her a quick few texts to let her know you’re alive and well, but you leave out the sweet little detail that you’d shared AirPods with the guitarist of the band you’re touring with. You’d get into that part later.

The walk to the pharmacy is short, thankfully, and you find the things Josh needs without much of an issue at all. The city is still fairly crowded with people at this hour, and you make sure to track your steps backward just the way you came to get back to the hotel. Your stomach rumbles again, and the smells coming from the various restaurants around you have your head spinning with hunger.

A few quiet knocks on Josh’s hotel room door bring him to answer it within seconds, and his warm composure instantly makes you feel welcome. “Y/N! Thank you so much, seriously. I need to knock this shit out before it gets any worse, and I think you just saved the day,’ he gushes as you see clouds of steam pouring out of his cracked bathroom door, and smell the sweet scent of herbal fragrances as they waft through your nose. “You have any trouble finding the place? Google said it was close by…”

“Anytime, Josh. And no, actually. It was right around the corner,” you answer, handing him the bag of meds.

“Good. Well I won’t bother you again, you heading to sleep?” he asks with a warm tone.

You bite the inside of your lip as your stomach screams at you again. “No, I passed a little pub on my walk, and it smelled amazing as I walked by. Think I’m gonna go have a drink and get something to eat. I’m starving.”

“Go feed yourself, love. Enjoy the city. We’ve got a long day tomorrow!”

“Will do, see you tomorrow!” you say as he closes the door.

“Thanks again! See ya!”

You make your way to the elevator and down to the bottom floor, digging your phone out of your pocket to check your location and make sure the pub is still going to be open at this hour. A quick search for Le Marmitone tells you the kitchen doesn’t close for another hour, so you pick up your pace and head straight for the pub.

The wind and rain have picked up a little bit, and you thank yourself for adding a few layers on before you left your hotel room earlier. The cold air bites at your cheeks as you meander through the people still out walking the streets, and the smell of the food drifting on the wind draws you straight back to the pub. Upon entering the double doors, you find that it is actually a nice restaurant with a bar.

You grab a seat at the corner of the bar, glancing to the coolers and shelves to see what your drink options are.

“Evening madame, here is a menu. Can I get you a beverage?” a man in a sport coat asks as he hands you the shiny white menu. His accent is thick, but you can understand him fairly easily.

“Hello. Could I have a whiskey soda and a water, please?” you ask as you remove your heavy jacket and hang it over the back of the stool. You look over the menu choices and decide on a bowl of soup and a sandwich, more of a lunch option, but a steaming hot bowl of soup sounds exactly like what you need right now.

There are a few people still scattered throughout the restaurant, most closing their tabs and leaving for the night. There are a few patrons still at the bar, stuck in conversations with one another or watching whatever game is playing on the big screen.

The bartender sets your drinks in front of you as you tell him your food order, and you pull out your phone to begin fishing through emails and making your daily checklists. The Whiskey drink is strong, but not too strong, and you let yourself enjoy the immediate warmth it sends coursing through your veins.

You fill your stomach up as far as it will allow you, and you decide that one more drink probably won’t hurt, as the place doesn’t close up for another hour. You’re enjoying yourself, basking in the calm before the storm that is going to hit promptly at 10AM tomorrow.

“‘Scuse me, sir. I’ll take one more drink and my check, please,” you alert the bartender. He nods and turns to concoct your drink and print your tab. When he returns, he plops a bright red maraschino cherry onto the top.

“Gentleman at the end of the bar says this one is on him, ma’am.” He places the white slip of paper in front of you as he removes your dishes, and disappears. Your eyes slowly drift to the left, landing on an older gentleman who had been lingering at the end of the bar since you’d gotten here. His friends have since left, leaving him to finish off a few more rounds by himself.

He smiles hard when you notice him, and slides off his stool, stumbling his way toward you. You feel your heart rate pick up as he approaches you, and you remember that you do have mace in your purse, should you need it, Ruth’s one request.

“Hello, lovely. Enjoy that drink on me this evening,” he slurs with a heavy accent. He sits down in the stool beside you, and suddenly you’d rather not have that second drink, after all. You glance at the drink, and back to him, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable in his presence.

“Um, thank you, really. But I—I’ve actually got to go. It’s getting to be later than I thought…” you lie, pulling out some cash from your purse to pay the bill.

“Nonsense! Have the drink, beautiful. Tell me, where are you from? Your accent tells me it’s somewhere far away from here…” he presses, pushing the drink toward you. His hands are giant, and covered in dark hair. He has a beard of the same color that reaches almost down to his stomach, and you can smell the alcohol radiating from his breath.

“The States,” you say bluntly, avoiding eye contact with him as the bartender is nowhere to be found. You immediately kick yourself for not telling Dean where you had run off to, all by yourself. You know better than this.

“Obviously, sweetheart. But where?” he asks.

“Um, a small town, you’ve probably never heard of it,” you go on, beginning to pull your jacket on and leave the money on the bar top. Suddenly the man’s hand is on the back of the stool, holding it steady as you try to turn it.

“I’d like to hear all about it, love,” he growls, and you suddenly feel very intimidated. There is no one else around, no other patrons at the bar, you couldn’t feel the presence of another human or employee running about, and you contemplated making a run for it.

“I promise I’m not here to scare you, just talk. That’s all I’d like to do…” he goes on, backing his hand away from the chair as he notices your panic. Finally, the bartender makes his way back, but instead of taking your check, he continues cleaning and re-stocking for the night. You’re alone, and uncomfortable. Why did you do this to yourself?

Suddenly you remember that Jake put his number in your phone. You know you can’t get a hold of Dean at this hour, especially since you didn’t tell him you were going anywhere. You can’t make that bad of a first impression before your first day even really happens.

You quickly turn your attention to your phone, trying to figure out what to do, but then it hits you. You type in the name, taking a deep breath before sending Jake a risky text as a last ditch effort.

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing here alone, hmm?” the man asks as you turn away from him to type as quickly as you can.

You

1:47AM: Jake, are you awake?

Your foot taps nervously on the floor, the man next to you doing everything in his power to corner you into this seat. A text bounces back after a minute, and you feel your shoulders relax just a touch.

Jake 🗡

1:49AM: How did you get this number?

You

1:50AM: You put it in my phone today on the plane. Are you busy?

Jake 🗡

1:51AM: Oh, hey. No, I’m just getting ready to go to bed, why what’s up? You okay?

You

1:52AM: No. I don’t think so. I hate to ask this, I know it’s late. Is there any way you could come meet me? I left to get something to eat and didn't tell anyone and this guy here has me cornered into my seat and I don't think he is gonna let me leave alone.

Jake 🗡

1:53AM: Share your location, I’m leaving now.

You

1:54AM: Thank you. I owe you.

“Did you hear me sweetheart? I said, are you expecting someone?” the man asks, a sly grin on his face as he leans closer to you.

You quickly glance back down at your phone, sharing your location with Jake and hoping he can find you. You lock your phone and put it in your purse, pretending you’re a lot less anxious than you actually are.

“Actually, yes, I am. My…boyfriend is on his way. He’ll be here in just a second.” you lie, doing your best to speak confidently. “I should probably step outside to meet him.”

“No, no, stay, you haven’t touched your drink,” he says, gesturing to the glass of alcohol. “I know a place down the street, stays open late, too.”

You feel your skin start to grow clammy, the man's intentions suddenly becoming very clear. Your heart is pounding as you try to talk your way out of the situation. You clear your throat, and just as you start to speak you see the front door of the restaurant open. Jake steps inside, looking side to side, his eyes quickly scanning the entirety of the restaurant until he locks eyes with you.

He nods to the host at the door as he walks toward you, wearing the same clothes from earlier but now his hair is a little messier. You know he got out of bed to do this.

You instantly stand from your seat as Jake steps up, reaching towards him as he settles himself between you and the man.

“Hey baby, you finally made it,” you coo, your pleading eyes locked on Jake’s as he wraps his arm around your shoulder in a welcoming hug. You can smell him, the cologne lingering on his coat. The same coat that was wrapped around you only hours ago.

He pulls away and drops his arms to his side as you turn to him. You stare at him just a second longer, hoping he can hear the words you are screaming in your mind. He blinks and turns to look at the man before letting his eyes flick back to you.

“Yeah, yeah, of course babe, sorry I was late,” he pauses, turning to face the drunk man beside him. “Who is this?”

You let out a small breath of relief as he silently agrees to play along with you. “Oh, he came over from the bar. He sent this drink over, but I just can’t drink it. I already had one and you know I work in the morning,” you answer, hoping he is understanding what you’re trying to say. “Do you want it?”

He looks so effortless standing there with a hand in his jacket pocket. He tilts his head and scrunches his nose just a bit before answering, “Ahh, nah…It looks like a watered down well pour and I just had one myself before I got here. I’m alright. We should probably get going though, we have an early day tomorrow and it’s fairly late already.”

Yes.

“Oh, you two are terrible liars. He isn’t your boyfriend, is he sweetheart?” the man asks, scoffing at Jake. “You should come with me, I can show you the city better than this fool.”

“That’s an awfully brazen assumption, sir, I must say.” Jake argues, pulling his hand from his coat pocket and grabbing yours. You suck in a harsh breath feeling his fingers lace with yours. Fake or not, there was definitely a new feeling swirling through your veins.

“Look at her, she’s flustered. This woman hasn’t ever been touched by you. It’s written all over her face.” he continues, looking Jake over.

“Your boyfriend, your husband, he isn’t any of those things. I don’t see a ring on your finger, and I don’t know how they do things where you’re from, but in this country, you my dear, are fair game.”

You want to snap back. The audacity is astounding. You start to step forward, ready to lay into him, but you feel Jake’s hand squeeze yours and you know he’s telling you to follow his lead this time.

“She is with me, sir,” Jake spits. “And it would be in your best interest to back off.”

“Oh, is that right?” the man counters, standing up from his seat, giving him a few good inches over Jake. Jake didn’t falter though. Of course he didn’t. He knew that didn’t matter.

“Kiss her, then. If she’s yours, kiss her,” he quips.

“Absolutely not, I don’t have to prove anything to you, and quite frankly sir, it’s none of your business,” Jake snaps, you can tell he’s starting to get mad, his hand gripping yours a little harder. “Let’s go, babe.”

You stand firm next to him, not letting your face show a single waiver of emotion as the man waits to see if you’ll crack. Jake starts to walk away pulling you behind him, but before you can move the man grabs your other arm, taking both of you by surprise.

“Stay, sugar. Let a real man take you home.”

Jake snaps his head around, hearing the words fall from the man's drunken mouth. For a minute you’re scared. You don’t know how Jake is going to react, his jaw is hard set and his nostrils flared in anger. You hear him curse under his breath as he shakes his head.

“You know what? Fuckin’ fine…” he challenges, looking at the man then to you, nodding just enough for you to notice.

Just as you feel the anxiety of what he is about to do bloom in your chest, he reads your body language, letting a sweet and quiet ‘S’okay’ slip from his lips.

Your eyes widen a little as you realize what’s about to happen, but take solace in the fact that he’s likely just as nervous as you are. He stops, pulling you in towards him as his hand grabs at your waist.

His fingers grip into your hairline as he tilts your head just enough to deepen the kiss. His tongue swipes over your lips, hot and wet as your hands slide up his body to rest on his chest. You kiss him back, you’re trying to sell this as the real thing, but also partly because you just want to. You try not to think about that part too much as you let your tongue flick against his just for a second before pulling it back. You feel the vibration on your lips as the softest groan leaves his mouth just as he pulls away from you.

Your lips are wet with the taste of him and your chest is heaving as Jake rubs his lips together and clears his throat. He turns to the man who is standing there staring at the two of you, a bit of challenge in his tone as he speaks. “You good now?”

The man scoffs, mumbling a curse as he bats at the air between you. You feel yourself relax in Jake’s grip as the man turns to walk back to his original place at the bar. A quiet ‘fuck’ leaves Jake’s mouth as he turns his attention back to you, stepping back and releasing his grip on you.

His eyes search yours just as yours search his, both of you unsure what to say. Instead he looks over to the man again, nodding his head to him as he grabs your hand again and guides you towards the door.

“You okay?” he asks, opening the door and letting you walk out into the drizzle. You pull your jacket closed across your front, the cold air chilling your skin.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m okay. Thank you– for that,” you murmur as he steps up next to you. He grabs your hand again, lacing his warm fingers with your cold ones, taking you by surprise.

“Oh, it’s okay now Jake, he isn’t following us,” you offer, looking over your shoulder to check. He doesn’t drop your hand though, in fact you feel his fingertips brush across your knuckles, sending a whole different kind of chill through your body.

“I know,” he answers, smiling shyly as he peeks at you out of the corner of his eye. You’re positive he can see the blush that has taken over your cheeks, your mouth suddenly dry, and your mind unable to form a response. You feel the butterflies swirling around in your stomach as you walk towards the hotel, the rain starting to taper off finally.

“You can trust me, you know,” he says, his voice sincere as he guides you around puddles.

“I barely know you, Jake,” you smile, bumping your shoulder into his.

“For now,” he answers, squeezing your hand in his.

He opens the door to the hotel lobby, the warm air instantly hitting you. Jake drops your hand, your fingertips brushing against his. You kind of miss it, in a way you definitely shouldn’t be.

“Thank you again, for doing all of that. I’m really sorry. I fucked up, I won’t make that mistake again,” you say, watching him press the button for the elevator. Your eyes linger on his lips, a little pink from the cold air outside.

“It was no problem, I promise. Stop apologizing,” he pauses, motioning for you to step into the elevator. “Let me walk you to your room, what floor?” he asks, his finger hovering over the buttons.

“Oh, no it’s really okay, you don’t have to do that. I promise I’m good now,” you stammer, watching his lips turn up in a huff of laughter.

“Y/N, what floor?”

“Nine,” you squeak, your eyes fixated on the dimple in his cheek. You feel your skin growing warm just from looking at him, you feel like you might burst into flames just at the thought of how his lips felt on yours. Did you imagine that whole encounter? No way all of that just happened.

“Me as well,” he says, pressing the button as the doors close.

The two of you ride up in silence, casting each other the occasional glance every few seconds. His tongue darts out to wet his lips and you're positive you stopped breathing. The elevator chimes as it reaches the ninth floor, and you nearly jump out of your skin at the sound.

He smiles at you again as the doors open, gesturing for you to walk ahead of him. “Your room number?”

“Um, I think I'm 924, all the way down,” you answer, your heart jumping in your chest.

He nods his head and puts a hand into his pocket. “Alright, I’m just up here in 915, but I’ll walk you down.”

“Jake you really don’t have to, you can just–”

He turns to you and laughs, shaking his head again. “Just let me.”

“Fine.” You huff a breath, pulling your own keycard from your purse. He walks only a step behind you, both hands in his pockets now as you step up to your door. You tap your key to the lock and hear it beep, signaling for you to enter. You turn to look at Jake, seeing a softness to his face you hadn’t noticed until now.

“Thank you, for…being such a gentleman,” you say playfully, smiling at him.

“My pleasure, Miss Y/N. There is some chivalry left in the world…” he answers, bringing his hand up to rub at his lips.

You start to enter your room, and hear him speak again, this time very quietly. “We’re not all bad.”

You turn around to see him shifting his weight still rubbing his fingers over his chin as if he expected you not to hear him.

“What?”

He hesitates as he makes eye contact with you, clearly shocked you heard him. You can tell he wants to say something but he’s holding back. Maybe you’ve spooked him.

He shakes his head with a smile, as if telling himself whatever he wanted to say was stupid. He pulls his phone and his keycard from his pocket and grips them in his hand. “Nothing, nothing, um, have a good evening. I will see you in the morning, I suppose.”

You nod once, giving him a sweet and appreciative smile, “See you in the morning.”

He lingers for just a moment, eyes locked on yours before flicking down to your lips. He catches himself and looks back at you before turning to head down the hallway. You shut the hotel room door and twist the lock, letting out the breath you had been holding with a gasp.

You spin around, letting your back press against the door as you sink down to the floor with a barely audible squeal. Holy. Shit. What the hell was that?

Pull yourself together Y/N.

You grab your purse and stand up, digging through it as fast as you can in search of your phone. You have no earthly idea what time it is in Nashville but you don’t care as you pull up your texts with Ruth, and begin furiously typing.

You

2:34AM: Without going into detail I definitely just kissed the guitarist 🫢

You toss your bag onto the chair and change into your pajamas, your blood still rushing around in your body as you try to calm your nervous system. A text bounces back, and you know it’s her.

Ruth

2:40AM: WITHOUT GOING INTO DETAIL???? KISSED? I just got to my desk!!!! I’m here. I’m sat. I’m listening. I want every single detail in a five paragraph essay with MLA formatting.

You

2:42AM: Lol it is 2:40 in the morning. I will call you tomorrow, which is really still today for you, but kinda tomorrow for me? I don’t know this is confusing but I will call you and give you the full run down because we also shared airpods on the plane and he made me a playlist? Love you goodnight!

Ruth

2:44AM: AIRPODS? A PLAYLIST??????

2:45AM: Y/N NO! GET BACK HERE

2:45AM: Okay. Hang on, I’m googling him. I need to see this man’s face

2:46AM: Wait there’s two guitarists

2:46AM: Ok one is the bassist HELLO?? You kissed HIM?! Aldjsfklsk

2:48AM: It’s totally fine and I am being so normal about this. Talk to you later, if I haven’t pulled all my hair out by then! I’ll be creeping his insta all day! Goodnight!

You laugh as you read her onslaught of messages, knowing that she is likely going out of her mind with possible scenarios. You make your way into the bathroom, washing your face and brushing your teeth so that you can positively melt into the bed and sleep until your alarm forces you awake. You’re patting your face dry as your phone buzzes on the bathroom counter, but the noise it makes isn’t one you’re familiar with. You hang the towel on the ring and pick up your phone, seeing a notification come through that is brand new to you.

‘Jake Added A Song to Your Shared Playlist: 🐥’

He what?

Now?

Your blood runs cold just seeing his name on your phone after…well…whatever that was.

You turn off the bathroom light, hesitantly sliding your finger across the notification, and letting it bring up the playlist. There at the very bottom you see that a new song was added two minutes ago. But not just any song, no. You know this one. You know this one well. You tap on the song hearing the familiar and haunting guitar riff of ‘Kiss Me’ by Sixpence None the Richer start to play through your phone speakers.

You can’t help but to laugh, a smile of shock has your jaw hanging wide open as you stand in your giant fancy hotel room, listening to what you consider to be a fairly romantic song sent straight to you from none other than your knight in shining, well, corduroy, armor. You couldn’t even picture him listening to this song, and somehow that almost made it a little better.

As the chorus plays you fall backwards onto your bed, the fluffy white sheets enveloping you as a giddy feeling swirls through your chest. He’s thinking about me. He’s thinking about that kiss. You felt guilty for thinking about it, but now? Now you weren’t feeling so guilty. He liked it just as much as you did, clearly.

Jake Kiszka liked kissing you.

You.

What?

You couldn’t wipe the stupid smile off of your face if you had to. You didn’t want to. This was quite possibly the most thrilling thing that has happened to you in months. Years! You had all but forgotten about creepy bar man at this point, but god you have half a mind to walk right back into that bar and shake his hand.

But, you knew you had to calm down. Take a breath. The song came to a close, leaving the hotel room silent. Your mind was still swimming in bliss, replaying the feeling of his lips on yours, the way his hands held yours, the way he smelled, the way his lips tasted, oh god… He was thinking about your kiss. He all but told you so.

You were also thinking about that kiss. He wanted you to know he was thinking about it. How can you– Oh. A sly grin spreads across your face as you type into the search bar.

You find the song you’re looking for, your thumb hovering over the add button as you try to talk yourself out of doing this. It could end badly, terribly, really. He is technically your boss, and you know you shouldn’t be doing this, but. Hey, you’re just the runner. You smile as you watch the little box pop up reading ‘Added’.

Your heart starts to pound. Did he get a notification? Is he asleep? Did he see it? Will he understand? Since when did you start communicating with people through song titles?

You rush back to the playlist scrolling to the bottom and smiling as you press play on the new addition to your shared playlist. It's mere seconds before ‘Do It Again’ by Steely Dan starts to play and you laugh, knowing you are absolutely crazy. Do it again, of course you wanted to do it again. God he probably thinks you’re such a loser. Plot twist, you are, but he doesn't have to know that yet.

You listen to the song, plugging your phone into the charger and turning off the lamp. You’ve always loved Steely Dan, it reminds you of your dad, but then again who doesn’t it remind of their dad? The song comes to a close, your giddy feeling finally starting to wear off as the exhaustion starts to step into its place. Your eyes feel heavy as you roll towards the nightstand to set your alarm, groaning at how soon it’s coming. You lock your phone and settle into the pillows, letting out a content sigh as you recap the day in all of its insane glory.

Your phone buzzes on the nightstand, the glow illuminating the room for just a brief second. You freeze as you stare up at the ceiling, almost too scared to look. Did he add another song? What if he changed his mind? What if you overstepped? Oh god. You should not have done that. What were you thinking?

You suck in a breath as you grab your phone, nervously tapping the screen that shows no new songs added, but a text from Jake.

Jake 🗡

3:04AM: I fully intend to.

Oh, he definitely saw it.

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devilat-thedoor · 5 months ago

Text

What Is and What Should Never Be Ch 7. pt1

A/N: to everyone who’s waited patiently while i got my shit together and found my motivation, i appreciate you and i hope you’re still with me🩵 the support i’ve received on this story means more than i could ever explain… but things are about to get a little rocky. i love you🫶🏽

Word Count: 9.1k

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, Smut(Unprotected Shower sex, Overstimulation[very briefly], Oral[m rec]), Minor Arguing/Fighting, Alcohol Consumption, Mentions of Death(loss of a parent/parents). If i missed anything, please let me know!

If there was anyone to ever get through this life with their heart still intact, they didn’t do it right.

“Hmm…stop…” You giggled sleepily at the feeling of Jake’s fingers sliding beneath your shirt to poke at your ribs. “Jake, I’m sleeping.”

“Doesn’t sound like you’re sleeping, peach…” His head was on your chest, his legs tangled with your own, “Hey.”

You lifted your head and opened your eyes to find him looking up at you. “Hey.” Giving him a soft smile, you reached to push the hair from his face.

“Good morning, beautiful.” Jake grasped your side and rolled over to pull you on top of him, wrapping his arms around you tightly. “Let’s do something today.” He was studying your face as though he were memorizing every detail. Picking his head up, he pressed his lips to yours for a brief moment. “Anything you want, peach… I just wanna spend all day with you.”

After stealing another kiss from him, you sat up to straddle his waist. “Wait- You’re supposed to open today… What time is it?” When you leaned over to grab your phone from the nightstand, he squeezed his arms around you and flipped you, pinning you down with his body. “Jake!” You squealed, wrapping your legs around his waist, “You’re gonna be late…” You warned, but the way your hands held onto his back made it clear that you didn’t want him to move.

He was kissing along your jaw, smirking at the way your breath caught in your throat. “I called Charlie last night… He’s covering my shift.” He left no room for you to question as he continued spoiling your skin with warm kisses. “So what do you wanna do?”

“Hmm…probably shower first…”

“Shower?” His teeth grazed your collarbone and he chuckled at the gasp that escaped you. “Okay, we can shower… Then what?” He took it upon himself to grasp the hem of your shirt, rising from your body enough to pull the shirt over your head.

You lifted from the mattress as he did so, flopping back down with a giggle. “Umm… Then coffee and breakfast?”

“Done and done.” Jake resumed his position on top of you. “What’s after breakfast, peach?” He latched his mouth onto your breast, sucking at the supple skin.

“Then maybe we c- shit…” Your back arched as he dragged his tongue over your nipple, forcing the skin to pebble. Your mind was swirling at the feeling of his mouth and his hands on you, though you couldn’t help but acknowledge the elephant in the room. “Then… Maybe we talk about last night?”

He froze for a moment before laying his forehead on your chest, releasing a defeated sigh as he replied quietly, “There’s nothing left to talk about, Y/N.” Silence hung between the two of you until he finally lifted his face. It was evident from the look he was giving you that he didn’t want to have another conversation regarding his ex.

Cupping his cheeks, you gave him a sympathetic smile. “I don’t just mean that.” You began to slide out from beneath, pulling yourself into a sitting position, and he followed suit. You rubbed your hands over your face as he raised an eyebrow at you in question. “Jake, do you trust me?” When he began to roll his eyes, you pulled the blanket up to cover your bare chest. “Don’t do that, just-...” You had to laugh a little as he eyed you with annoyance. “Despite the way that you flirt with Olivia and constantly favor her over me, I still trust you.” Slowly, you moved towards him, letting the blanket fall away as you climbed into his lap, “Baby… I just need to know that you believe me when I say that I’m yours. I don’t want Josh- I don’t want anybody that isn’t you.” Pressing a soft kiss to his lips, you felt his body relax.

“I know- I believe you.” His hands begin to roam your body again, skimming your thighs and the length of your spine. “I’m gonna be better, peach, I swear… I’m gonna try.” He held your gaze, his brown eyes soft and vulnerable, and you began to melt into him. “Please tell me that’s enough…”

You nodded your head, twisting your fingers through his soft hair, “It is… It’s more than enough.” Your gentle reassurance brought a small smile to his face and he moved in for another kiss but you jumped up from the bed before he could connect his lips to yours. “What?” You asked when he held his hands out in confusion.

“We were in the middle of something… Come back here.” He was almost whining, though he’d deny that if you called him out on it. Jake crawled to the edge of the bed and reached for your hand, trying to pull you back into the sea of sheets to get lost with him.

Grasping his face in your free hand, you squished his cheeks, forcing his lips to pucker. You couldn’t help but giggle at his annoyed expression as you pecked him one last time before turning away from him, “Shower first, remember?...... Then coffee and breakfast.” Pulling your robe from the back of your bedroom door, you shrugged it on and tied it to cover yourself before slipping out of your room and going to the bathroom. After turning the water on, you took the chance to brush your teeth while it warmed up. As you removed the robe, ready to step into the steaming hot shower, the door opened.

Jake greeted your look of question with a grin as he stripped out of his boxers without an ounce of bashfulness. “What? I need a shower too… Thought we could conserve water.” He shrugged his shoulders and pulled the curtain back, watching the way you hungrily eyed him. “We don’t have all day, peach. We’re getting dangerously close to missing breakfast…”

Chewing on your lip, you finally slid the old, tattered boxers down your legs and moved by him to step in the tub, “I suppose that is the most important meal of the day.” Once you were beneath the stream, he stepped in behind you and closed the curtain. “Hey!” Just as you tilted your head back to wet your hair, Jake had yanked you out of the way and took your place.

“Can I have the shampoo, peach?” He reached blindly as the water cascaded down and around his face.

Your gaze traveled over his body, “Mhmm…” Squeezing a bit of the product into your own hand, you stepped closer and rubbed your palms together to create a lather. Once you were close enough that he could feel the heat coming off of your body, he peeked one eye open just in time to see you reaching up to scrub the suds into his scalp. His hands fell to your waist and he pulled you against him as a groan vibrated from his chest and rattled against your own. “You have really great hair, y’know…”

Jake leaned his head into your touch, his smile growing mischievous, “I know, baby… But you-” He paused, his hands sliding down your back and over your ass, “-have a really great ass…”

An involuntary moan escaped your mouth as he squeezed the flesh and leaned forward to kiss you. “Aht! We gotta rinse, Jake… Then condition.” Tugging on his hair, you forced his head back under the shower and worked the soap out of his strands. He remained patient through the process and allowed you to apply the conditioner and rinse it before moving out of the way so you could wash your own hair.

As you finished raking the conditioner through your locks, he pressed himself against your back and brought his hands around to cup your breasts, “You know how tortuous it is, peach… To watch the way your body moves while you do the most mundane of tasks…” His voice was a husky whisper in your ear.

“Is that why your dick is poking my asscheek right now?” You looked over your shoulder at him and reached back to grasp his hardening length, smirking at the sharp intake of breath he took.

He bucked into your hand as his mouth latched onto your neck, kissing and sucking, his tongue dragging across your wet skin, “I swear to god, if I don’t get to fuck you before we leave this apartment… I might die, peach.”

“I think you’re being dramatic.” You tightened your grip on him and began to stroke his cock, the remnants of conditioner making your hand slip over him with no resistance. “I’ll give you five minutes to make me cum…”

He pulled his mouth away from you with a scoff, “Five minutes? Why only five?”

“Because I have to rinse the conditioner out of my hair in five minutes…” You began to slow your hand to a stop, “If you don’t think you can do it then just say that, Jake.”

He released a growl and grabbed your wrist to pull your hand off of him. Within seconds, he had both of your hands and your chest pressed against the shower wall, “Keep your hands here and your smart mouth shut.” Jake grasped your hips then, pulling them back slightly while you remained still, and before you knew it, he was buried completely inside of you. “Fuuuuck… I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the feeling of you.” He drew himself out of you and straight back in, setting a surprisingly slow pace. Goosebumps scattered across your skin at the feeling of his hot breath on your neck and despite the relaxed, lazy strokes he was giving, you still fought to keep your moans locked in. He was watching your face, the way you bit your lips together and squeezed your eyes shut, “How many minutes do I have left, baby? About three, would you say?” There was a hint of amusement in his words like he was mocking you.

“Yes… Three.” You replied through gritted teeth, annoyed that your orgasm was already beginning to build.

His right hand slithered from your hip to find your clit as he began to flick and tease the bud beneath his fingers, “I can feel it, peach… You’re already close, aren’t you?” A short laugh escaped him as the whimpers you’d been holding started to cascade from your lips, “What’s the matter, hmm? You didn’t think I could do it?” If there was one thing about Jake, it’s that he would never pass up the opportunity to gloat.

It was all winding too fast for you to stop it and it was mostly thanks to his skilled fingers, rolling over your clit at an eye rolling speed. “J-Jake… Please… I’m gonna- I- shit…” Your body was moving on its own, rocking back to meet his thrusts, and your legs started to wobble. “Oh god… Oh…god!” You cried out, your climax washing over you in such a hot rush that it made the water feel icy. Jake held you up as he slid his length out of you and a shiver swept over your skin.

“I think I still have a minute to spare.” He was always so arrogant, cocky. You stepped out of his hold and sank to your knees, wasting no time in sucking him into your mouth. “There you go, baby- fuck… Do you know how pretty you look with my cock in your mouth? So fucking pretty…” The water was raining down over your head, streaming down your face, and he carefully combed his fingers through your hair to move it out of your face. You swirled your tongue around the tip holding eye contact with him. “C’mon, peach. Don’t you fucking tease.”

You let him fall from your mouth, your hand picking up the slack, and gazed up at him through your lashes, “I’m not teasing, baby… I’m savoring.” You gave him one long kitten lick, accompanied by a satisfied hum.

His head rolled back as he let out a needy groan, then he suddenly had a fistful of your hair as his head snapped back up and his jaw clenched tight. “You can savor all you want later, but the water is starting to get cold and my patience is wearing thin. Open.” His demanding and dominant voice alone could’ve brought you to a second orgasm if you weren’t so focused on giving him what he deserved. Taking your hand off of him, you opened your mouth wide and stuck your tongue out. Jake loosened his grip on your hair as he used his free hand to guide his cock to your mouth. You kept your eyes locked on his and closed your lips around him as he pushed further. “Use your tongue, baby.” He sounded desperate, his nails scratching at you scalp as he fucked into your mouth.

You obliged, waving your tongue along the underside of his cock, putting pressure on the large vein that decorated it. When an unexpected whimper tumbled from his mouth, you pulled yourself off of him, “Jake…baby, can you let me have control for a minute?” You gave him the best doe eyes you could manage.

He eyed you silently for a moment, but when you leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his shaft while maintaining eye contact, he relinquished and gave you a single nod, releasing your hair. “Don’t play games, Y/N. If you- oh fuck…” You didn’t give him time to finish his threat as you took him back into your mouth, bobbing your head and stroking him simultaneously. The grunts leaving his throat told you that he was enjoying it but you took it step further, removing your hand completely to grasp the back of his thighs and swallow him all the way down. “Jesus christ, peach. I-...” He trailed off as your throat pulsed and squeezed around his tip. The hot water had officially gone cold and you could feel Jake shiver beneath your fingertips. He was muttering under his breath, nothing of coherence, and you knew he was there, he just needed a final push. As you resumed bobbing your head again, you began to massage his balls and that was more than enough. Jake desperately grasped at the back of your head as he came. An abundance of curses and praises rained over you with the water as he emptied himself onto your tongue. “Peach…” It was a warning to tell you that he was finished but you continued to blow him, hollowing your cheeks while you innocently gazed up at him. He was trying to pull you off of him by your hair, his brows pinched tightly, “Y/N…” He was beginning to tremble, his knees getting weaker and threatening to buckle but you wouldn’t let up. He was starting to whimper and whine, an unfamiliar vulnerability creeping over him, “P-please… I can’t- you gotta st-... I can’t take it, peach.” His pleas were wearing on you and you were about to stop when he was overcome by a second climax.

You eased him through it as gently as you could, rubbing your palm up and down his thigh in a soothing manner. Jake was panting, holding onto the shower wall to keep himself upright, when you spun around to shut the water off and stand up. “Are you okay, baby?” Stepping towards him cautiously, you wrapped your arms around his midsection and placed a soft kiss to the center of his chest.

He looked down at you through heavy lidded eyes and for a second you thought he was going to be mad at you. “I’ve never felt anything like that. What the fuck did you do to me?” He was still a bit breathless as he wrapped his arms around you, and kissed your temple.

You giggled softly, looking up at him, “Would you trust me enough to let me do it again?” Yanking the curtain open, you broke away from Jake to step out and grab your towel, “Overstimulation can lead to a more heightened sense of euphoria because it borders the line between pain and pleasure…” You shrugged as you tossed a towel at him and watched him pat his skin dry before securing it around his waist all while trying to hide his smirk. “You liked it, didn’t you?”

He cut his eyes to you, seeing your own grin, “No… Kiss your little power trip goodbye, peach.” He walked by you and pulled the bathroom door open to usher you out. “I do appreciate that lesson in overstimulation, though…” As you passed through the doorway, he reeled his hand back and left a sharp smack to your ass, causing you to yelp, “It’ll come in handy later.”

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Summer had breezed by in a flash and aside from the solid tan you got, the only thing that changed between the start of the season and the end, was how much your feelings for Jake had grown. Maybe it was falling asleep and waking up tangled together… Or maybe the countless dates; some spent curled up on his couch with a glass of wine and a new takeout menu while the two of you tried to agree on a new documentary to watch. Other times, you’d find yourselves at some hole-in-the-wall bar that nobody’s ever heard of, but leave it to Jake to sniff out a place with live music. Thinking back on your first day of work at Highway Tunes, you never would’ve expected to still be here, let alone sitting in the passenger seat of Jake’s car as he held your hand over the shifter, driving you to work.

“I’ll be back to get you at closing, yeah?” He pulled into his usual spot in the back lot and shifted the car into park, finally releasing your hand.

You grabbed your bag from the floor and dug through it to make sure you had everything you could possibly need for your shift, “No…” Turning to look at your boyfriend, you smiled and leaned over the console to kiss his cheek before grasping the door handle.

“What do you mean ‘no’? What-.”

Gently placing your hand on his thigh, you waited for him to stop talking. “You and Josh promised Sam that you’d go on that hike with him tomorrow so he could get pictures for his portfolio. He’s going to have you both up before sunrise and I don’t want any part of that if I’m working the double tomorrow.” You watched as he started to pout, biting back your giggles. “You’ll live, Jake. It’s one night without me… Besides, I’ve barely seen Bell at all the past few weeks and we’re gonna have a movie night.”

He grasped your hand before you could pull it away from him, “What if I don’t live, Y/N?” He was leaning in closer to you as he spoke, “What if I bury my face in your pillow and suffocate?... Or what if a bug crawls into my mouth and I choke and you’re not there to save me? Do you really want that on your conscience, peach?”

The tip of his nose poked yours and you rolled your eyes at him, “You’re ridiculous… And you’re not gonna change my mind. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You left him with a soft, lingering peck and pushed the car door open to step out. In true Jake fashion, he waited until you were through the back door of the store before he drove off.

“Hey! Y/N, I’m glad you’re here. I want- shit…hang on…” Josh was struggling to untangle himself from a mess of christmas lights and cords when you came out of the back hallway.

He gave up and remained seated on the floor, trying to unknot the mess around him as you approached, “Josh… Honey, what are you doing?” You dropped your bag and kneeled beside him to examine the varying array of wires, “Christmas is like, four months away.” Out of habit, you immediately began to help him, pulling the string lights apart.

Josh watched you quietly, a smile ghosting over his lips at the way your brows scrunched in concentration. “You’re always diving in to save me, sweetheart…” He whispered it so softly, it was like he didn’t want you to hear it. “We uhh… We do this end of summer event every year.”

“An event?” You lifted your head to look at him just as you pulled a knot free.

“Yeah… So we set up a big tent in the back parking lot and have a few local bands play some music. We charge fifty bucks for front door entry and that gives the customers access to the live music out back and we always have a ton of food and drinks. But it’s also an automatic entry into a giveaway we do.” He managed to get one of the light bundles free and wrapped it neatly to set aside.

You raised an eyebrow at him, “Fifty bucks? People pay that?” You couldn’t hide your shock at the cover price.

Josh chuckled as he yanked at the wires, “It seems steep, I know… See, all the money goes to a good cause and the community loves to offer support.” He twisted his body, reaching into a box behind him to grab a piece of paper and pass it to you. “This is last year’s flyer… We open around 1pm, people pay the cover and they can browse as usual if they want or they can just head straight out back for the music and food.” He was hyper-focused on a specific knot and you couldn’t take your eyes off his hands, his fingers. The way the veins protruded and flexed beneath his skin as he pulled more lights away from the tangles. “But the money is-... My eyes are up here, babe…” He had a giant, teasing grin when you cast your eyes to his face and you were sure your face was bright red, but he just laughed it off and continued, “All the money we collect from the entry fee goes to a non-profit organization. We try to donate to a different one every year but it’s almost always one that gives young kids the opportunity to learn about music or instruments, y’know?”

You finally managed to pull a strand of lights and an extension cord free at the same time, “Is this another tradition that your parents started?” After neatly wrapping the wires, you set them aside and put your attention back on the curly haired boy.

“No, actually. Jakey and I tried to convince them to do it a few times but they thought- well, with the money that would have to be put into everything to make it all happen, they didn’t think it was worth the risk.” A look of pride arose on his face with a soft smile, “We both saved a lot of our own money from working here and when mom and dad finally passed it down to us… It wasn’t even a conversation that needed to be had, we knew that we wanted to do it so we made it happen.” He dropped the knots he was working on and started to stand up, “C’mere.” He took your hand and helped you up from the floor before leading you to the office. You let your hand remain clasped with his until he released it to pull something from the shelf behind the desk. “This is from our first year.” It was a small photo album. Josh laid it on the desk and ushered you into the chair.

Taking a seat, you looked down at the leather cover and ran your fingers down the edge before flipping it open. “Oh my god… Is this you and Jake?” The very first picture in the album was the twins, standing outside of the store. They both looked so young, baby-faced, and a lot different than how you knew them. The sight of Josh without his facial hair made it so much more obvious that he and Jake were completely identical. “Your hair, Josh… You look-.” You paused, clamping your mouth shut.

“Sexy? I know… All the ladies and the gents wanted me.” He was half joking but still gave you a smug smirk.

“I was gonna say you looked like a douchebag but I suppose if you felt sexy…” You chuckled at the scoff he let out and glanced up at him, “Oh, you know I’m joking. You were very sexy, boss. The faded sides suit you, but I like your fluffy curls now better… for the record.” Dropping your eyes back to the album, you flipped the page to find more photos from that same day. Sam was in a few of them along with another boy that you’d never seen before. “Bell would get a kick out of these. Sam was just a baby, oh god. You were all so young.” You studied Jake in all of the pictures. There was something different about him that you couldn’t quite place your finger on so you moved your attention to the mystery boy. A handsome, tall, dark haired boy. “Who’s this? You guys never mentioned a fourth brother.”

Josh sat on the edge of the desk and crossed his arms over his chest, “That’s Daniel- Danny.” He was smiling down at the photos as he continued, “He’s Sammy’s best friend. We all grew up together. So yeah, I guess he is our brother. I’m surprised you haven’t met him yet, he’s been back from college all summer.” As though he was growing impatient, he reached down to turn the next page himself, “Those were from when Jake and I were fresh out of high school. Mom got excited with the camera and spent the whole day taking pictures.”

Silence fell upon the two of you as you flipped further in the album. You stopped at a picture of Jake, holding his middle finger up to flip the camera off, or maybe whoever was behind it. “Did Sam take these? They’re so good.” You’d gotten better at noticing his work with a camera. Between the way Bellamy gushed over his talent and the few times he’d been in the store or at Jake’s, showing off his photos, you’d grown to appreciate how talented he truly was.

“Yeah, actually. He kept insisting that we’d want to look back at the year our lives changed.” He put air quotes around the last part, “But we knew that he was only documenting to keep an eye on us for mom and dad… I guess I’m glad he did.” Josh slid off of the desk and crouched down beside you with excitement, placing a hand on your knee to keep himself balanced, “He made a photo album for Jake and I and a matching one for our parents- OH! Okay, these are from our first charity event!”

“Oh wow… This is so cool.” You’d never seen the store so full. There were dozens of people in the pictures, laughing, shopping, mingling. As you continued to flip, there were photos of a makeshift stage in the back parking lot, a band playing while people watched and cheered. Jake stood at a small, portable grill, flipping burgers with a genuine smile on his face. There was a girl standing close to him, watching him, her smile not quite as big as his but still present. As you continued turning the pages, her face was becoming more frequent in the photos, always close to Jake. You started to feel a sick, sinking feeling in your stomach as you scanned over her light brown hair and blue eyes. “Josh…” He looked up at you as you turned the page, his smile fading at your expression. “Who is this girl in all the p-...” Your voice faded off as your question was answered by the next page of pictures; Jake holding her hand, embracing her, kissing her.

“Shit… Umm, I should-.” Josh attempted to close the book but you flattened your palm against it to keep it open. “Y/N, I-... it’s nobody, just-.”

“It’s her. It’s Ivy, isn’t it?” You watched as he pulled the book away from you, waiting for a confirmation.

He released a sigh and closed it, standing up to place it back in its place on the shelf, “I forgot she was even in any of the pictures, that’s not why I was showing you them.” When he turned to face you again, he had a look on his face that you were beginning to grow accustomed to. “Y/N, look…just-.”

You cut him off, knowing exactly what he was about to say, “I won’t bring it up to him. It’ll stay between us…promise.” Standing up from the chair, you placed a hand on Josh’s arm to ease his stress. He held your gaze for a moment, his brown eyes nearly hypnotizing, and reached up to brush a strand of hair behind your ear. “Um- I should…do my job.” You pulled away from him and pointed towards the doorway before his fingers could make contact and made a swift exit.

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The shift stayed fairly busy and so did you, for the most part. You took care of the customers while Josh finished detangling the lights and cords and by 7:00, it had pretty much died off. The store was empty for the first time in hours and you finally had the chance to take a break. You finished putting away the stack of cassette tapes in your hand and went to grab your bottle of water from beneath the front counter. As you passed the office door, you stopped to do a double take, “Jake?” You pushed the door open further to see your boyfriend leaning over the desk, looking at the computer screen with his twin. “When did you-”

“Peach, come over here and give us your opinion.” He interrupted you, holding his hand out. Josh flicked his eyes to you briefly before setting them back on the screen. Jake’s impatience got the better of him, as it usually did, and he was coming across the small room to grab your hand and pull you to the opposite side of the desk. He planted you in front of him, a gentle grasp on your hip, as he pointed at the computer. “Which one do you like better?”

You looked back and forth between what you assumed were designs for this year’s flyers. There were two different options and you knew right away that each of the designs belonged to one of the twins. “No. Nuh uh. I’m not gonna be the deciding vote in this. Count me out.” You tried to break away but your boyfriend moved his hand from your hip and wrapped his arm around you, holding you against him.

Josh turned to you then, “Y/N, we’ve been arguing over this for days now. We need a tie breaker so we can get them printed.”

“Ask someone else to be the tie breaker!” You whined, trying to wiggle out of Jake’s hold.

The curly haired twin released a long, exhausted breath, “Come on, sweetheart… You’re the only one who’s opinion isn’t biased.”

“Yeah… Come on, sweetheart.” Jake mocked his brother with a smirk before resting his chin on your shoulder.

“How do you know I’m not biased?” You leaned forward, placing your palms flat on the desk to really examine both designs. They were both great and you could easily tell which belonged to who. Jake’s was set on a black background with a gold border and gold lettering. Elegant but not flashy. Josh’s was the opposite; bold and vibrant letters with a fun font. A border made up of vinyl records. “I like this one a lot.” You pointed to Jake’s first and he was ready to celebrate his triumph but you weren’t finished, “But… I think that this one is the better option.”

Your boyfriend dropped his hands from your body, “Of course you do…”

“Jake, don’t start. You wanted my opinion, I gave it… Don’t act like a child.”

“How is his better? It looks like a 1st grader made it.” He took a few steps back and leaned against the wall, “Why don’t you be honest and tell me why you really like my brother’s design better?”

Josh rolled his eyes, shaking his head a bit as he attempted to soothe the tension his twin was creating, “Jake, it’s not a big-”

“No, Josh.” You cut him off as you whipped around to address the long haired boy, “I never said that I liked his better, first of all. Let’s get that straight.” You were pointing your finger at him like a mother scolding her child as he stared at you, “Second of all, you wanted my opinion. My un-fucking-biased opinion. And that’s what you got. Both designs are great but Josh’s is more eye-catching and they’re going to be a hell of a lot cheaper to print… If you’re not worried about the money, then fuck it. Print both. I don’t give a shit. I need out of this goddamn room.” You wasted no time in leaving the office, only stopping to grab your phone from beneath the counter then walking to the back to step outside.

You propped the back door open and took a deep breath of the cool summer air, trying to force the tension out of your body. It had been lingering beneath your skin since you’d seen the photo album and you didn’t know why. Maybe it was how deep in love Jake looked in the pictures with her… Maybe that you’d never seen him look at you like that. You shook the thoughts away as best as you could, remembering that he still has a wall up around his heart and he’s really come a long way since you first met him.

“Peach.” He laughed as you jumped at his unexpected presence. “Baby, I’m sorry…”

You took a few steps away from him, “It’s fine, you just startled me.” You were staring at your phone screen, reading a text from Bellamy, when he closed the distance between you and plucked the phone from your hands.

He slid the device into his pocket, ignoring your grabbing hands and protests, “No. I’m sorry for acting like a dickhead.” He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you towards him as gently as he could, “I- You’re right. Josh’s is a better option and we’re gonna go with it… I got a little insecure when you chose him over me.”

His admission made you melt into him as you brought your arms up to wrap around the back of his neck, “I didn’t choose him over you, babe. But I understand where you’re coming from and why it may have seemed like that.” You were lost in his sweet, brown eyes as his lips began to curl, “Jake, I l-.” Realizing what was about to come out of your mouth, you bit down on your lip to stop it. It’s not that you didn’t want to say it, but you didn’t want to spook him, so you skated around those three words with something that felt safer. “You’re mine, okay? And I’m yours. Nothing else matters.”

Jake left a soft kiss on your forehead and everything was still for a moment until he pulled back to look at you, “You sure you don’t wanna come back home with me tonight?”” He made it so hard to say no when he gave you those eyes.

“Of course I want to…” You skimmed your hands down his torso with a sweet smile, “But Bellamy texted and wants to go out for a drink when I get off.” Wiggling your fingers into his pocket, you retrieved your phone to text your friend back.

“You said a movie night.” The way his tone changed told you that he didn’t like the idea of you going out. “I thought you wanted to sleep because you’re working a double tomorrow…But you’re going out to a bar?”

Rolling your eyes, you sent a text to Bell to confirm and tucked your phone away, “I told her one drink and then home. She won’t push, Jake. Trust me.”

“Then can I go for a drink with you?”

“Jacob…” You rubbed your temples, closing your eyes for a moment, “One night will not kill you. It’s just Bell and I. One drink, then home for the rest of the night.” Digging your hand back into his pocket, you pulled his keys out and dangled them in front of his face. “Babe, go home. You can catch up on that show that I hate and stretch out on the couch or in bed without me clinging to you…” You knew none of it mattered. He’d take every night with you over anything else and he’s made that obvious. “I’ll call you when I get home. I’m gonna go clean up for closing. Go.” Grabbing his hand, you dropped the keys into his palm and closed his fingers around them. You pressed your lips to his cheek before moving by him to go back inside but he caught your wrist, pulling you back.

He didn’t say anything, just stared at you with those pretty, espresso colored eyes. You could’ve gazed into them forever if he didn’t finally speak. “I’m gonna sleep like shit tonight, you know that?” he kissed your temple and released you, walking to his car.

Letting the backdoor fall shut, you went back to the front to begin your closing duties and found Josh sweeping the floor. “Hey, I was gonna do that, hun.” You went for the rag and spray bottle to clean off the front counter and display cases.

“I already wiped everything down, sweetheart.” He gave you a small smile as he brushed the pile of dirt into a dustpan. “In fact, everything is pretty much done. I doubt we’ll get much traffic through here the rest of the night, I’m probably just gonna lock up.” He placed the broom back in its spot behind the counter and glanced at the clock as he smoothed out his mustache, “You can clock out for the night and head home if you want.”

Following his eyes to the clock, you saw that it was about 7:45pm. “Oh. Umm. Yeah, okay. Let me call Bellamy.” You unlocked your phone to find your friend’s contact. You held it to your ear, thankful that you’d be able to go for a drink and get home even earlier than you’d anticipated. “Bell? Hello?” You struggled to hear her over the noise in the background on her end.

What’s up, babe?

“Bellamy, I can barely hear you. Where are you?”

What? Hang on, let me just-... Okay, is that better?

The noise faded out to almost silence, making it easier to hear her clearly. “Yeah. So, you can come get me now.” When she didn’t respond, you repeated yourself, “Bell, you can just come pick me up now. Josh is gonna close early.”

Umm… Can you get a ride to the bar? I don’t have the car, Sam drove.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Bellamy?” It was impossible to mask your annoyance. “I thought it was just going to be us? Like you have my car, how do you expect me to get there?”

We were already out getting dinner so we just came to Louie’s after we ate… Just have Jake bring you, babe.

You could feel Josh’s gaze as you released an aggravated sigh, “Jake isn’t-. You know what. It doesn’t matter. I’m just gonna get an uber home.” Choosing to ignore her protests, you hung up the phone and dropped it on the countertop. “Typical fucking Bellamy.” Burying your face into your palms, you let out a loud groan.

Josh was standing on the opposite side of the counter now, “That sounded a bit stressful… You okay?”

“Yeah. No? I don’t know…” You looked up at him and his expression made you realize how harsh your tone was. Taking a long breath, you forced yourself to relax, “She’s just up Sam’s ass, as usual. I gotta get an uber and then I will be out of your hair, boss.” You gave him a half smile and reached for your phone again.

“No. Hey.” He waited for you to look at him again, “Don’t waste money on that shit… I’ll give you a ride home. I just need to finish up a few things here, if you don’t mind waiting on me?”

You contemplated for a moment but when you finally agreed, he turned around and disappeared through the office door. When he didn’t reemerge, you followed after him. “Is there anything I can help you with at all? I don’t wanna be completely useless.”

He was crouched behind the desk, gathering something that you couldn’t see, “You? Useless?” He scoffed as he stood up straight, his lip was tucked between his teeth but he wouldn’t look at you. His eyes wandered around the small room as though he were trying to find something, “Y’know… You’re kind of the most useful person we have here.” He walked around the desk, still searching, as he continued, “In fact…” His eyes finally landed on what he’d been looking for, “I could use you right now. Come here.” He waved you towards him and pointed up to the top of the tall bookshelf. “If I lift you, could you reach that?”

You followed the path of his finger to a liquor bottle, carefully hidden behind a few knickknacks. “Yeah… I think so. I should be able to.” Turning back to Josh with a bit of apprehension, you looked him up and down, “Are you sure you can lift me?”

“Are you insinuating that I can’t?” There was a mischievous glint in his eyes and though you knew it was probably a bad idea, you still decided to challenge him.

Crossing your arms over your chest, you raised an eyebrow, “Maybe… I mean, I am the one who does all the heavy lifting when we get the orders in on fridays.” You pursed your lips with a shrug and watched his gaze narrow.

He moved quicker than you anticipated, crouching low and wrapping his arms around your thighs. You screeched as he lifted you with ease and slung you over his shoulder. “Now make yourself useful and get that tequila!”

You were both laughing wildly as you used his shoulders to steady yourself and reached for the bottle. Once your fingers were secured around the neck, he began to carefully lower you. Out of habit, your legs parted to wrap around his waist, an act you were accustomed to doing with your boyfriend. As if he’d done it a million times, Josh’s hands shifted fast, one slipping around your back to hold you against him and the other gripping your thigh just below your ass. As your laughter died down, you became hyper aware of the position you were in, “Well… I got the bottle…” You held it in front of his face and awkwardly peeled your arm from around his neck.

He swallowed hard before placing you back on your feet and clearing his throat, “There’s no ‘I’ in team, Y/N.” He snatched it from your grip and stuck his tongue out at you, effectively replacing the awkward tension with his playfulness. Turning away from you, he grabbed two styrofoam cups from the stack on top of the mini fridge and placed them on the desk to fill each one. “If you tell me you need a chaser, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to look at you the same, sweetheart.” He offered you one of the cups, barely a shot's worth of liquid in it.

You took it and tossed it back without hesitation, if only to prove a point, and immediately coughed as it burned its way down your esophagus. “I fucking hate tequila.” The taste lingered in your mouth and you would’ve given anything for a lime slice or two to chase the bitterness with.

Josh gulped his own shot down with a shocking amount of ease and held the bottle out to refill your cup, “Shall we have another?”

Staring at the liquor, you slowly nodded your head, “Just one more and then I’m done.” You were supposed to go out for a drink anyway so a couple shots couldn’t hurt.

“Hell yeah!” He filled your cup again, a little more than the first time, and then his own. “Bottoms up- err… Cheers? I don’t know.” He clashed his cup against yours and took his shot, shaking his body out with a grimace. “Fuck- that one hurt.”

You couldn’t help but giggle at him, “What’s the matter, Josh? You need a chaser?”

“Shut up and take your shot.” He tried to force a scowl as he splashed the remaining droplets from his cup at you. When you finally stopped laughing and emptied the cup, he took it from you and tossed it in the trash can. “Alright, darlin’... I gotta finalize payroll and finish up some paperwork. It shouldn’t take me too long, so just hangout, make yourself at home.”

Giving him a nod, you turned to exit the room as he took a seat at the desk. Wondering what you could do to pass the time while you waited, you gravitated towards the record player the boys kept beside the counter that played through the speakers in the storeroom. It was rare that you got the chance to choose which albums got played. Jake was particular on what he liked to play while he was working but now you had the turntable to yourself. You flipped through the small collection of vinyls they had and pulled out Abbey Road. Removing it from the sleeve carefully, you laid it on the turntable and placed the needle exactly where you wanted it. Something faded in through the speakers and you cranked the volume a bit before you began swaying through the room. The tequila was making its way into your bloodstream and creating a warm feeling that you just wanted to chase. Singing along softly, you slipped back into the office without a word to your boss and seized the bottle from the desktop. He was humming quietly, a smile plastered on his face as he watched you spin and twirl your way back out of the room.

After side one concluded, you flipped the album and let it play through as you went to dig through the used bins beneath the tables. You were sitting on the floor, sifting through a third crate between sips of liquor, when the music cut off with a slight record scratch. Just as you were about to get up to see what happened, a new song filtered through the room and you felt your heart constrict at the first chord. She Talks to Angels by The Black Crowes was a song that your dad used to play all the time when you were young. He’d pick you up and dance you around the living room while he sang and as you grew older, he’d play it in the car for both of you to sing together. Listening to it now, you couldn’t even remember the last time you’d heard the song and it made your sadness that much more prominent as the first few tears began to fall.

Josh came into view, his smile falling in an instant when he found you on the floor, slumped against the cabinets and wiping at your cheeks. “What happened? Y/N, what’s wrong?” His concern was evident as he knelt beside you and placed a comforting hand on your knee.

“I’m sorry. I-...” You tried to compose yourself as you looked down at the bottle by your feet. You wanted to throw it across the room, a sense of anger coursing through you at the mere sight of it. “Take this. Please, Josh… Please j-just get it away from me.”

He took the tequila as you pushed it towards him and placed it behind his body to get it out of your view. “Y/N, you’re scaring me, what’s wrong?”

You took a few deep, calming breaths and wiped the remaining drops from your face with a sniffle. “Sorry… That song. Umm- I haven’t heard that in forever. I guess it kind of opened up some wounds.” An awkward laugh escaped you as you sat up straight, “God, that’s embarrassing. Sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” His voice was the softest you’d ever heard it. He reached up to catch a single, stray tear with his thumb, brushing it away from your chin, “You wanna talk about it?”

You never talked about your parents to anybody but Bellamy and even that was rare. Jake didn’t know anything about your life back in Pennsylvania and he never pushed you to talk about it. But now, looking into Josh’s eyes, you felt an overwhelming urge to divulge everything to him and you couldn’t explain why. “My dad used to play that song all the time when I was little, it was like, our song… He was my best friend, Josh. The coolest guy you’d ever know, I swear.” Josh stayed quiet as he settled in beside you, listening respectfully. You went on, sharing small details of your childhood, good and bad memories. When you started to get into the harder details of your teenage years, he took hold of your hand in a comforting and encouraging grasp. “Everytime we thought mom was getting better and slowing down on the drinking, we’d find her hidden bottles… She started getting belligerent when she would drink and it got scary. I hated her- hated being around her. I begged my dad to leave but he wasn’t that kind of man, he always had to take care of everyone.” Your voice began to break as you talked about the last time you saw him, “She was sober, I swear to god she was fucking sober when I came home for fall break. Maybe she just got too good at masking it? I don’t know… But her mask started to slip and she got sloppy fast.” You felt yourself sinking further into Josh’s side for comfort that you didn’t realize you needed, but he welcomed it, wrapping an arm around you. “The knock didn’t come until almost midnight and I knew before I even answered the door… The impact took them both instantly.” It was a lie, but your mother had been dead to you for a while so it made it easier to pretend you lost her with your dad.

“God, Y/N… I’m so sorry- I’m so fucking sorry.” He held you tight, hugging you to his chest as you started to cry again. “I can’t even begin to imagine-...”

You looked up at him, your eyes shiny and bloodshot, “Don’t- please don’t say anything to Jake… I don’t- I’m not ready to tell him yet.” You were gripping his shirt as you pleaded.

Josh nodded softly, “I won’t, promise. It’s not my place, sweetheart.” You hadn’t noticed that the record ended a good while ago, but everything remained silent. Josh’s fingertips lightly grazed up and down your arm and the sound of his light breaths put you at ease, lulling you to sleep. You weren’t sure of how long you’d been out when you heard him speaking quietly through your sleepy haze. He must’ve been on the phone but you couldn’t focus enough to know if it was real or if you were just dreaming. “...Were you sleeping?...I’m still at the store with Y/N. I think you should come get her, man…No- don’t be a dick about this, Jake… Her and Bellamy got into a fight, I just- I don’t think she should be alone tonight…Yeah… Okay… Bye.”

The silence pulled you back into a drowse until a hand was gently shaking you awake, “Peach… wake up, baby.” Your eyelids fluttered for a moment before Jake came into focus. He was looking at Josh, who was standing a foot or so away, staring down at you with the bottle of tequila in his hand. Jake turned back to you, smoothing your hair out of your face, “Let’s get you out of here.” You allowed him to help you up from the floor and lead you through the store towards the back door, only stopping to grab your phone and bag. Josh didn’t say a word as he watched you both go and you were kind of thankful for that. Your boyfriend tucked you into the passenger seat of his car and made sure you were buckled in before he got into the driver’s seat and pulled out of the parking lot. Resting your head against the window, you allowed your eyes to fall shut again. “C’mon, peach. We’re home.”

Picking your head up, you looked around to see you were in the garage at his complex. He eased you out of the car and you held onto him as he led you into the building and to his apartment. Slipping out of your shoes, you broke away from him to go straight to his room and stripped out of your work clothes.

Jake entered the room a minute later to find you in one of his t-shirts, climbing into his bed. He offered you a bottle of water and you knew he was examining your puffy, red eyes. “You wanna talk?”

Chewing on your lip, you shook your head and moved over to make room for him. He put the water on the bedside table and turned the lamp off to crawl in alongside you, instantly wrapping you in his arms and pulling you against him. You returned his embrace, feeling your body melt into him as every ounce of emotional strain began to evaporate the second he kissed the top of your head. You froze, clinging to him, as you felt more tears pricking your eyes, “Jake…” It was the first word you’d spoken to him since he’d picked you up from the store.

His body went rigid at the sound of your cracked voice, “What, baby? What’s wrong?” He held his breath, waiting for you to respond, as his anxiety grew.

“I love you…”

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