#jake kiszka series

[builtbybrokenbells]

Little Miss Sunshine | JTK

Amidst a night of high emotion, one single confession turns your whole world upside down, making you realize that you had a certain someone misunderstood all along.

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader

Word count: 26k (oops)

Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, fingering (f!receiving), oral (f&m receiving), (sort of) face fucking, cum play, rough sex, also sweet sex, katoptronophilia (mirror sex), mentions/phrases pertaining to free use kink, dom/sub, possessiveness, praise, degradation, name calling, impact play, biting, sir kink, mentions of masturbation (f&m), multiple orgasm (m&f), simultaneous orgasm, overstimulation, begging, lots of dirty talk, lots of making out, dry humping, angst, unrequited feelings, feelings of not being good enough/rejection, overthinking, emotional talks, asshole Jake, drunk confessions, arguing, awkward small talk/conversations, fighting, non-sexual name calling, fluff, drinking, smoking, swearing, crying, sorry if i miss any!

heard you guys wanted some grumpy x sunshine love (this is also kind of bordering enemies to lovers) 🤔 also, this picture is EXACTLY what I picture Jake as in this fic. I was gonna wait to post but I was too excited to work on some other stuff coming very soon 😉. I hope you guys enjoy! As always, be kind and don’t mind any grammar mistakes 🤍 (very lightly edited)

“And then I said to him, try that shit around here, and you’ll see how it works out for you.” The tall blonde man spoke, his tone grating and growing more annoying by the second. He had an irritating smile on his lips as he continued trying his best to impress you with another, mind-numbing story.

“Right,” you nodded, swirling your straw around your drink, trying to sound more interested than you actually were. As you tried to think of something to say, you sucked a sharp breath in through your teeth, letting your eyes dart around the room in search of a familiar face. “I’m sure he kept to himself after that.” You finally replied, trying to up the ante and lessen the impact of your monotone response.

“Yeah, I love messing with the new guys at work. Always keeps them on their toes.” He said, taking a sip of his beer as he looked over your face. As he lowered the bottle from his lips, he seemed to lean even closer than he already was, making you force yourself backwards.

You had no idea how you found yourself in the situation, stuck in conversation with a mediocre man about his mediocre job (which you still weren’t quite sure what it even was) and desperate to find a quick way out. You had come to the stupid party for one reason, and so far, you hadn’t seen him once, despite it being hosted at his own house. As you scanned the crowd for the millionth time, you found yourself growing more impatient than you already were. Your foot tapped against the ground as you checked your watch, wondering if you were already in too deep or if you could slide out the front door without being noticed.

Then, a wave of relief washed over you as you caught sight of a familiar head of brown hair. You threw back the last of your drink, placing the empty cup on the table as you scrambled to refill it with the premixed bottle you brought in your bag. You fumbled with the cap you’d screwed on too tight while listening to the man across from you ramble about an office staff party he’d attended last week, eventually prying it from the top of the juice jug after a moment's struggle. You tipped it forward, filling the solo cup and snatching it off the table after you shoved the jug back in your bag.

You had never seen your best friend's house so full; people were crowding the hallways, nearly standing on top of each other as they tried to force their way into the rooms overflowing with bodies. The music was astonishingly loud, and you definitely weren’t drunk enough to enjoy it yet. Worse than that, you barely recognized a single face in the crowd, and you were desperate to find someone you knew.

“Anyway, it was nice getting to know you, Johnny. I see Sam over there, so I better go say hi.” You forced a blinding smile, giving him a friendly pat on the shoulder as you tried to map out the best way around him.

“J-Johnny?” He asked, confusion written all over his face. “My name is Jimmy.” He corrected, his ego bruised at your lack of interest in him.

“Oh, shit.” You swallowed back an awkward laugh, biting down on the inside of your lip as you shuffled to the side. “Jimmy, Johnny… same thing, really. See you around?” You offered, knowing there was no way you would ever allow yourself to be alone with him again, unless you spent days sleepless and were desperate to find something that would lull your mind and force your eyes shut.

You didn’t wait for a response, instead pushing through the crowd as quickly as possible so you didn’t lose sight of your target. With your drink clenched tightly to your chest, you fought your way through the swarm of bodies that seemed keen on blocking the doorway. You extended your arm outward, your fingers brushing over the thin material of Sam’s long sleeved shirt as you grabbed onto his shoulder. His head whipped around, wondering who was touching him and why they were in such a panic to catch his attention. When his eyes landed on you, a blinding smile lit up his face.

“Hey, I was looking for you! Didn’t think you’d make it, Knockout.” He stopped in his tracks, completely changing course and turning towards you. He took a step in your direction, extending his arms outwards and engulfing you in a hug. You breathed a sigh of relief, letting the scent of his familiar cologne wrap you in an embrace warmer than the one his arms provided.

“I’m the guest of honor, ‘course I made it.” You rolled your eyes, pulling away from him slightly. “And I told you to stop calling me that.”

“You’re always the guest of honor at my house.” He grinned, letting his hand linger over your back as he looked over your face. You noticed right off the bat that he reeked of alcohol. His eyes were glazed over, soft and dark as his expression spoke loudly of all you needed to know. He was hammered, and you were very late to the party. “And I think knockout is fitting. A ten who will knock me on my ass if I say the wrong thing.”

“I’d like to be equated to more than a ‘ten’ with a bad temper.” You laughed, slouching down slightly as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

“I wouldn’t call it a bad temper… more or less a ‘fuck around and find out’ type of person.” He explained further, pulling you tightly into his side as he began to weave through the crowd.

“Yeah, I guess that fits.” You hummed an agreement, happy that you were safely by his side so you no longer had to wander aimlessly and get caught in conversation with people you didn’t know.

“It’s way more crowded than I thought it would be.” Sam noted, talking loud enough so you could hear him over the boom of voices and music.

“Yeah, I certainly wasn’t expecting this.” You laughed, honest about your feelings on the matter. When he invited you, he failed to mention that he invited the entire city of Nashville to the party alongside you.

“Yeah, guess I overestimated the size of the place.” He chuckled. “We’re hanging out downstairs, less crowded and a bit more comfortable.” He said, leading you around the corner to the stairwell. There were a few people standing in the way of the stairs, but they dispersed pretty quickly when they realized the two of you were trying to make your way through.

Sam was your best friend, and had been for years. You met not long after he moved to the city, when you were still in college and keen to the party lifestyle. Through mutual friends, you found yourself sitting in front of him at an album release party for a band that no longer existed, sharing your sentiments about the mediocre music and your love of tequila. From there, the two of you formed a fast friendship, finding you had more in common than a knack for drinking and appreciation for music. You weren’t expecting such a strong relationship to come from a drunken night orchestrated by friends who couldn’t have cared less about you, but you were incredibly grateful that you decided to go.

Since then, you and Sam did nearly everything together when he wasn’t gone on tour. Once you graduated, you found that you lost contact with most people from your university days, but it never seemed to bother you, because Sam was always around to do that, instead. When you were holed up in your house, working from your laptop and too busy to go anywhere, Sam sat beside you, commenting on anything and everything that came to mind. You guys frequented the bars around town, and got lunch when your schedules permitted. Oftentimes, you found yourself dozing off on his couch after a movie night with no intent of staying the night and waking up the next morning with a blanket over you and a pillow under your head.

He was the best friend you’d ever had, and you were thankful for his love every single day. You loved him so much that you couldn’t even refuse his invitations to parties where you knew nobody but him and his brothers, and most times you were glad you went, just so you had another memory to share with him. That night was no different; he was throwing a party just for the sake of it, inviting friends he’d made in the industry and drinking for the sake of being drunk. When he asked you to come, you gave a hesitant reply, knowing that you were bound to be awkwardly standing amongst a swarm of strangers. Within a few days, he’d convinced you it was alright, and eventually you gave in.

That afternoon, you spent an extra amount of time making yourself look nice. You went out the day before and got your hair touched up, and you even bought a new dress. You were feeling a little down, finding yourself in quite the romantic draught that worsened your loneliness as time went on. When you expressed such feelings to Sam, he seemed to make it a point to set you up with some of his company and promised that tonight would end the embarrassingly long bout of involuntary abstinence. Although you were nervous about his choice of company for you, you opened yourself up to the idea, knowing that you wouldn’t have much luck on your own.

It wasn’t that you were deliberately choosing to abstain from dating, but you were having a particularly hard time finding anyone who met your standards and more importantly, your needs. You were growing sick and tired of modern dating, and despised dating apps and all that came along with them. You weren’t in search of a hookup, and you weren’t looking for marriage tomorrow. You wanted someone who you could have fun with, to get to know without it being overwhelming and too much too fast. You wanted someone suitable for your mid-twenties; exciting, compatible, and loyal. Unfortunately, that seemed to be quite hard to come by.

You knew you had a lot to offer. You were kind, funny, and sometimes too nice for your own good. At the same time, you didn’t put up with any bullshit, which made it incredibly hard to open yourself up to someone. You could easily tell when someone only wanted sex, and people like Johnny (or Jimmy; whatever the hell his name was) made it abundantly clear. His lack of self-awareness and his commitment to getting closer to you despite there being no invitation to do so turned you off of him from the minute he began to speak.

On the other hand, because of your guard being up, oftentimes you read a little too much into the situation and ruined things before they could even begin. You were at an impasse, and such a large one that you enlisted Sam’s help to find you a suitor. You were an overly nice person who’d been burned too many times, and you were (as some would say) picky. You barely trusted his judgment, but you figured that you would at least try and open yourself up to his ideas, because you certainly weren’t getting anywhere by yourself.

“You know, I figured that tonight might be a good night for you and Jake to get to know each other.” Sam stated, nearing the bottom of the stairs.

“Jake?” You asked, confused as you followed behind him. You pulled down the skirt of your tight fitting dress, carefully stepping down on the cool wooden floor as you passed the bottom step. “Like, your brother who’s barely given me any inclination that he knows I exist?” You asked, bewildered that Sam would even suggest that. “And when he does, he looks like he’d rather be with anyone else rather than with me?”

“Oh, come on. That’s not true.” Sam chuckled, turning back to face you now that you were on solid ground. The basement was much less crowded than the upstairs, just like Sam had told you. It was nice, allowing you to actually sort out your thoughts before your head was pulled into another direction.

“It is so!” You laughed, taking his response with a grain of salt. You didn’t have complete certainty that Jake felt that way about you, but he definitely didn’t make it a point to try and be friendly. “I get along so well with Josh and Danny, and then there’s him. He never talks to me, and he basically ignores me when I speak first. When he does answer, it’s like, one or two words, and never any kind of emotion. I don’t think he likes me, and that’s fine, but I definitely don’t think we should ‘get to know each other’.”

“The other day you guys talked about the weather!” Sam argued his point, only making you roll your eyes.

“Yeah, the weather, Sam. You know, like the most basic of small talk that exists?”

“He seemed really passionate about the sun.” Sam shrugged, reaching out and placing a hand on your back. “Just give it a shot. You never know, right?”

“Sam, if that’s who you’re trying to set me up with, you’ve officially gone insane.” You muttered, letting him guide you towards the group of people huddled by his large arrangement instruments.

“Not insane, and I mean it, Y/N. I think you guys would really get along if you got past the weather. It’s not that you don’t like each other, you’ve just never tried that hard, and neither has he.”

“Yeah, because I’m pretty sure he hates me!” You whisper-shouted, nearing the chattering crowd.

“That’s a strong word,” Sam said, clearly trying to put an end to the argument. “Besides, I already asked him to talk to you tonight, so I guess there’s no real way out of it.” He shrugged, a sly smile forming on his lips as he began to walk away from you.

“Sam!” You exploded, reaching forward and grabbing his hand to hold him in place. “Why would you do that? Now he’s going to feel pressured into talking to me!”

“Listen, Y/N.” he sighed, his lips still holding a ghost of a smile. “Jake won’t feel pressured into talking to you. If he really doesn’t want to, he won’t. Jake does not hate you, and Jake knows you exist. He’s just not the most outgoing. Once he’s out of his shell, I promise you’ll understand what I mean.” You could tell that Sam was genuine in his response, much different to the lighthearted jokes that he spewed prior. You didn’t want to be the bad guy and tell him that you thought his brother was an asshole, so instead you shifted uncomfortably under his strong gaze and gave a single nod of your head.

If Sam wanted you to try so bad, you would, but only because Sam was your best friend.

In truth, it wasn’t like you never thought of Jake in that way. In fact, you thought about it more often than you cared to admit, but you would have been caught dead before confessing it aloud. Most of the fantasies of Jake were contained within your bedroom walls, in the late hours of the night and earliest hours of the morning, and it had little to do with conversing with him and certainly not anything romantic.

Jake was attractive, and that was undeniable; he drew attention from the crowd the minute he walked in the room, and eyes never strayed from him until the moment he walked out. His long hair and his beautiful brown eyes made for a deadly combination, and the slight rasp to his tone when he spoke low and slow sent a rush of emotion straight to the pit of your stomach. The pinkness of his lips, especially when they glistened after his tongue ran over the bottom one, was delicious, and you were all but ignorant to that. He did not talk often, not nearly as much as his company, but when he did, it was always worth listening to, whether it was a joke or something insightful.

Jake's physical appearance had little to do with your apprehensions. If anything, it made you more willing to try out what Sam was asking of you. Although he’d never been outright mean to you, Jake had solidified his impression in your mind over the years; curt, dry, and a little judgemental. His micro expressions that seemed to go unnoticed by everyone else spoke louder than words to you, and he never seemed like he wanted to interact with you at all. He sat on the opposite side of the room from you, avoided your group-pointed topics and questions, avoided being alone with you at all costs, and got out of every one on one conversation with you as fast as he could.

Oftentimes you felt like he was watching you, studying you so he could find something he didn’t like, so then he could be crude and unapologetic about it. His eyes always seemed to land on you as the nights dragged on, and the drunker he got, the more often he stared, but he never spoke. If he wasn’t so attractive, his actions may have been more off putting than curious to you, but even if you felt like he hated you, you definitely didn’t mind his attention being on you.

He was more gruff than Sam and Josh combined, and his resting expression was not the most inviting. He joked with his brothers, but not you directly. Although, whenever he said something to gain a laugh, his eyes always flickered to you, as if he was looking to see if you thought he was funny, too. He was a mystery, but not one you wanted to solve. Every interaction with him led you to believe he was not a fan of you, and every time you tried to analyze it, you only ever found yourself believing it ran even deeper than that.

Still, he was fucking hot, and you hated yourself for being so attracted to someone who couldn’t care less about you.

You followed behind Sam, your cheeks red as you bargained with your embarrassment over the situation. What did Sam actually say to Jake? Was it as innocent as he framed it, or did it go beyond the minimal information he gave you? You weren’t sure you wanted to know, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to speak to Jake at all. In your years of friendship with Sam and the hundreds of times you had been around him, he had never been nice, and you were fairly certain he wouldn’t start now.

You wanted to believe Sam’s explanation of Jake, that he was just a tough nut to crack and you had never been fully committed to knowing him, but it just didn’t seem to check out. You were sure by now, Jake would have shown some idea that he didn’t mind you, or at least that he didn’t hate you, but there was nothing.

Well, except for one small little thing, but it was so long ago that you were sure he’d long forgotten about it.

“Woah, sorry!” Jake exclaimed as the door swung itself open. He took a step back, recoiling from the scene as if he’d just walked in on something explicit and was trying to avoid the awkwardness.

“No, it’s okay.” You muttered, closing your eyes and taking in a deep breath. This interaction was the last thing you wanted to experience in such a state, and you could only look forward to his standoffish nature worsening your already solemn state.

You had changed from your party clothes, the nice new jeans and shirt your sister had bought you for your birthday, which was the whole reason Sam threw you the damn party in the first place. You were in shorts and a t-shirt that hung just above your knees, your face tired and tear-stained as you made a quick move to wipe the dampness from your cheeks. “S’all good, Jake. You can have the bathroom.” You spoke again, a little clearer. The rasp of sadness in your tone was impossible to ignore, and even in his drunken state, he seemed to pick up on it.

You hated your birthday, and you hated that Sam insisted on throwing you a party for it. You wanted to leave, to go home after seeing everyone having such a great time while you were so miserable, but you were too drunk to drive and you would have felt terrible for abandoning Sam when he’d worked so hard to plan this all for you. The gathering was small, filled with people you loved dearly, and drinks were plentiful. Sam went all out with food, decorations, and dessert. You’d never had such an extravagant cake in your life, and you owed him everything for caring about you so much. You were so ashamed of your misery that you felt the need to hide in the bathroom while you cried, just so you didn’t hurt his feelings.

You weren’t sad because of the party, or even because of your birthday in itself. You were upset about the fact that no matter how hard you tried to have fun, something always happened that seemed to ruin the whole day, and this time was no different.

“You okay, Y/N?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowing together as he tried to read the situation. You barely looked up at him, feeling another wave of tears well in your eyes. He smelled so distinctly of whiskey, and his normal tough exterior slackened into something you could almost relate to relaxed.

“Yeah, fine.” You nodded, taking a step towards the doorway and expecting him to recoil when you neared him.

“Clearly not, sweetheart.” The pet name struck you as odd, the confusion growing even worse as he stepped in front of you to stop your attempt at escaping. “You’re crying, up here all alone on your birthday. Talk to me.” You finally looked up to meet his face, noticing your body flood with an unfamiliar feeling. There was a type of care in his face that you had never seen from him before, and it made your entire body raise with goosebumps.

“I… I’m alright, I guess.” You said, trying to find a way around confessing your sorrows to him.

“Can I come in?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, sure.” You breathed, nodding and stepping backwards out of his way. Once he was inside the room, he closed the door quietly, leaning against it as he casted his gaze back in your direction. Now that you were locked in a room with him, the smell of alcohol became all the more apparent, and it seemed to be mixed with a sweet scent of an unfamiliar cologne.

“What’s going on?” He asked, standing stagnant by the door as if he was fearful of coming any closer.

“It’s a long story, but I guess it doesn’t really matter. It’s over now.” You shrugged, raising your hand to your face to wipe your face clean of the sadness.

“Is it that guy you were with last time you were here?” He asked, hitting the nail straight on the head without even trying.

“Uh, yeah.” You nodded, surprised he even cared to notice you had company the last time you were around him. Jake had never been overly concerned with your presence, and you barely expected him to care enough to ask if you were alright. “Got in a fight before I came. Said he didn’t have time to come to my ‘stupid birthday party’ with my ‘stupid friends’.” You air quoted the phrases he used, sickened that you even let yourself spend time with someone who thought so little about the people you loved so dearly. “But he wasn’t too busy to party without me, and certainly didn’t mind locking lips with some other girl at the bar.” You explained, remembering the painful picture one of his friends sent through to you. You appreciated the fact that someone was willing to tell you about it, but it didn’t seem to make it hurt any less.

His lips pressed together tightly, the corners turned down into a frown as he digested the information you threw his way. For a second, he seemed as though he wanted to speak, but not long after that he silenced himself before he could get the words out. He swallowed thickly, toying with the ring on his middle finger as he tried his best to think of a response. Eventually, he took a deep breath and spoke words you never expected to hear from him.

“You are far too special to be caught up on someone like that, Y/N.” His tone was strong, leaving no room for doubt that he meant it. “I know it hurts right now, but you have to know that.”

“Thank you, Jake.” You said, your indifference for him melting away momentarily.

“Is it alright if I hug you?” He asked, carefully scanning your face. “Seems like you need it.”

“O-oh,” you breathed, shocked at his question. “Yeah, s’pose I do.” You let out a nervous chuckle. At that, all hesitation left his body and he stepped towards you. Carefully, he pulled you into his arms, his hold firm and the warmth of his body soothing. You let your head rest on his shoulder, trying to ignore the strangeness of the moment and enjoy the comfort. With your face buried in his button-up shirt, you finally had the chance to breathe in the cologne you had only previously caught a faint hint of. It was deep, woodsy and ambery, and it was unfortunately one of the most pleasant things you’d ever experienced.

You could feel his heartbeat, fast and strong as he held you close to him. One hand rested on the back of your head, an extra touch of warmth within his already strange actions. You had never been so close to Jake before, and for some strange reason, you never wanted to let go of him. From the minute he touched you, things seemed okay again, like nothing in the whole world could hurt you so long as he was right beside you.

Just when you felt yourself slipping out of the state of sadness, he pulled away. You found yourself mourning the loss of his touch, sad for a whole new reason as his body parted from yours. He didn’t completely abandon you, though. He let one hand rest on your arm as he used his other to wipe your tears away from your cheeks. With a soft smile, he spoke again.

“Don’t waste your tears on him, sweetheart. When it starts to hurt a little less, you should thank him for it, ‘cause it means someone as great as you won’t be stuck with someone like him.” He paused, ensuring you understood him before he continued. “Now, put a smile on that pretty face and come back downstairs. It’s your day, your friends are down there, and we want you to have a good night. Don’t let him win.”

You thought that maybe after such a sweet moment shared between the two of you, the dynamic might change, that he would warm up to you and a friendship would blossom. Thinking back on your hopefulness, you wanted to laugh in your own face. If anything, after the bathroom escapade, he grew even more distant. He stopped looking at you as often, avoiding your eyes when you looked his way and refusing to even let a chuckle slip when you spewed a joke. His already curt responses grew even shorter, and even less friendly. All of the affection he shared with you disappeared, and he acted as if it never happened at all.

You were ridiculous for expecting change, but disappointed still when you understood that he probably didn’t remember the interaction between you. He was drunk, and so were you, and it didn’t mean anything.

Still, no matter how hard you tried to believe it, it still fucking sucked.

You did everything in your power to get that side of him to surface again, but it only seemed to worsen his withdrawl. The nicer you were to him, the more he pulled away. So, eventually you stopped completely. You stopped going out of your way to build a relationship with him, because it was abundantly clear he wasn’t interested in it.

Funny thing is, when you started pulling away, he began to try.

A few weeks after you stopped talking, he went out of his way to ask you how you were. He lingered in rooms after everyone left, trying to remain inconspicuous as he waited for you to speak to him. His eyes landed on you more often than not, watching you carefully as you spoke to everyone else, waiting to see if you would laugh at his jokes. It was as if he missed you talking to him, even if he was the reason you distanced yourself in the first place.

He was so confusing, and you knew it was best to stay out of it. Even if you did think he was ridiculously attractive, he clearly had no clue how to express himself or any emotion whatsoever. The only thing you regularly saw from him was undesirable personality traits, indifference and annoyance most often, and anger at other times. You knew it wasn’t good for you, that you should stay away because you couldn’t get involved with someone so cold, and you did the best you could. Still, you would be the first to volunteer to kiss that damned scowl off his face, and happy to let him take his anger out on you.

The fact that Sam ever thought the two of you would work was absolutely blasphemous, but if Sam wanted you to try, you would at least give it another shot. Even if it was half-assed, you could still say you gave it your all, and he’d probably believe you.

Sam took one of the two available seats on the couches, far away from you and next to Josh. You felt a stab of pain in your chest as you realized he did so for a specific reason. The only seat left in the room was next to Jake, and as you began to approach, you feared he might get up and walk away as soon as your ass touched the cushion. Keeping your body rigid, you stepped over Danny’s long legs, extended outwards as he leaned back in the couch. You carefully stood between the two, letting the strap of your bag fall from your shoulder and it landed in front of you on the floor. As you sat down, you tucked the bag neatly behind your legs and against the frame of the couch. You let out a small breath of relief, noticing Jake didn’t change his stature at all as you took a seat.

‘Step one: complete.’ You thought to yourself, sipping at your drink to calm your nerves.

How ridiculous it seemed to consider sitting next to Jake a victory. The irony only grew as you remembered that Sam thought the two of you would make a good couple.

Jake had an acoustic guitar sat in his lap, tentatively plucking at the strings as he sat on the very edge of the cushion. You couldn’t help but stare, finding his face devoid of any negative emotion almost alluring. He was so pretty when he focused, the way his hair hung in his face and his eyebrows furrowed together in concentration. You strained to hear the light sounds coming from the strings, trying your best to ignore the booming music upstairs in hopes to recognize the tune he was playing. You watched as the tips of his fingers danced over the fretboard, delicate and calculated in every move they made.

Then, the soft hum stopped and his finger stretched across the fretboard to stop any lingering resonance. Your eyes flickered from his hand to his face, seeing that he was already looking at you. Your cheeks burned red as you understood he noticed your staring, and you swallowed back an awkward laugh.

“Hey, Jake.” You forced the greeting through your teeth, flashing a smile in his direction in hopes that the sweetness would deter his usual grumpiness with you.

“Hi.” He responded, his eyes trailing down to the solo cup in your hand. His greeting was short, but you counted it as a victory. Some nights, he never bothered to reciprocate at all, shooting you a pained look instead. The two of you sat in silence for a moment, neither of you knowing what to do or what to say. It was uncomfortable, but you forced the negative thoughts from your head and tried your best to think of a conversation starter. When it was clear he would not be the one to initiate, you spoke again.

“What song was that?”

“Who’ll Stop The Rain.” He replied, his stony expression remaining strong as he looked in your direction.

“CCR,” you nodded, embarrassed you couldn’t pick out the tune from memory. “My dad was a big fan of John Fogerty. Used to put us to sleep with the recordings from Royal Albert Hall.”

“Yeah, pretty good stuff.” Jake nodded, slow and stiff as if he would rather be anywhere other than with you. You took in a long breath through your nose, hoping that you could ease the painful tension between the two of you, but knowing it wouldn’t never happen unless he was willing to try, too.

“Yeah, absolutely.” You nodded too, taking a long sip from your cup.

“What’s your favourite song from them?” He asked, the words almost sounding strained as he asked the question. You fought back an eye roll, thinking it was absolutely ridiculous that he was troubled just to speak to you.

“Green River.” You answered, trying to be more enthusiastic than he was. You were happy he asked the question at all, considering it was probably the first thing he’d ever asked in attempt to get to know you, but his reluctance still stung.

“I like that one, too.” He said, his tone gruff but more friendly than it had ever been (save for the off night in the bathroom), even if the classification was a stretch. Then, he turned his head back towards the guitar, cutting the conversation short. You couldn’t help but feel a dissatisfaction with his actions, wondering why he couldn’t even pretend to enjoy a conversation with you, but you didn’t let it linger for too long.

You let out a sigh, turning your head to the other side of you, seeing Daniel’s smiling face. It was refreshing, and it was a relief to see his expression did not fade as soon as he looked your way. His arm was slung over the back of the couch behind you, his ankles crossed and a beer bottle clutched tightly in his hand. You figured he was an easier target, and a much more enjoyable way to spend your time.

“Hello, Daniel.” You gave him a warm smile as you spoke.

“Was wondering when you’d get here, K.O.” He said, flashing you a toothy smile to match your own.

“What did I tell you guys about calling me that!” You scolded, your tone light and your eyes shining with joy to tell him you didn’t really care all that much.

“If the shoe fits.” He shrugged, chuckling as he took a sip from his bottle. “What have you been up to? Feel like I haven’t seen you in forever.”

“I was away for a little while for work, actually.” You said, knowing you couldn’t get too much into it.

“You were away? That’s never good to hear.” He said, a slight grimace on his face. He was right; in social work, time spent away from your office usually meant something bad.

“Yeah, but it wasn’t anything major. They have a shortage of people a few towns over, so I volunteered to fill in for a little while until they could hire someone. I handled a few cases, but it was mostly just to do some paperwork so they didn’t get overwhelmed. I got back a few days ago.”

“You’re a saint for doing a job like that, you know.” He said, his words genuine and prompting a smile on your lips.

“It’s not the easiest job, but I like it.” You explained. “Someone has to stick up for the kids, you know? If their own parents aren’t doing it… then someone has to.”

You could not see it, but Jake’s head was turned as he sat behind you, his ear facing you so he could hear the words you were saying.

“You must be pretty good at it, too. I remember when Sam and I stopped by your office, it was plastered with drawings and colouring pages. Do you keep everything they give to you?”

“Yeah, I do.” You looked down at your hands as a sheepish smile crossed your face. “They always get so excited when they see it up on the walls, so it makes it worth it. Besides, brightens up my day when I see it, too.” You explained, knowing that you had never really thought twice about it; everything any of your clients gifted you was important to you and deserved a spot up on your bulletin board.

Alongside from Sam, your work was the most important thing to you. It was a part of you, and the only reason you and Sam got along so well is because he understood that. Lots of plans were cancelled or rescheduled at the drop of a dime, but he never cared and never made you feel bad about it. Sometimes, you were up at four in the morning, running out the door to the hospital in the early stages of your friendship, but it never deterred him from spending time with you. When you moved to a private company, things grew a little more relaxed and you had a lot more scheduled appointments rather than emergency appointments, but Sam would have stuck around no matter your situation.

“I mean, today someone gave me a yo-yo.” You said, a grin lighting up your face. “I’ve always wanted an excuse to learn those stupid tricks everyone knew how to do in middle school, and now I can.”

“Oh, I can’t wait to see that.” Danny let out a laugh, his shoulders shaking and his eyes crinkled with joy just at the thought of it.

“So what about you? What have you been up to?” You asked, growing tired of talking about you and eager to hear what he’d been up to.

“The same old, really. I went home and visited my family for a few days, so that was nice.” He said, knocking back the last of his drink and grabbing another from the box by his feet.

“That is nice!” You exclaimed, a warm smile encasing your lips. “I know you don’t get to see them all that often, so it must have been really good to go home.”

“It was,” he agreed, nodding at the thought.

“How’s your sister doing? I know she was stressed out about the last semester of school the last time we talked.”

“Good! She passed with no problem, worried about nothing as per usual.” He responded, almost wowed by how much attention you paid to him when he spoke.

“And that girl you were talking to… Sarah?” You asked, nervous you might have gotten the name wrong. He gave a nod, reassuring you that you got it right. “How’s that going?”

“Good! She couldn’t make it tonight, but I think it’s headed somewhere. Hopefully, at least.” He shrugged, trying to make it seem like it was less important to him than it was.

“I’m sure it will. I’m happy for you.” You smiled. Just as he was about to respond, Sam shouted his name from across the table, pulling him in a completely different direction. You didn’t pay much mind to it, settling comfortably back in your seat as Sam resumed an earlier conversation with the boy beside you.

You settled back into your seat, finding yourself content without feeling the need to be caught in conversation. You sipped at your drink, noticing your cheeks begin to turn rosy as the tipsiness started to set in. Your skin was warm, your mind swimming with thoughts that pertained to nothing important. You tucked your foot underneath your knee, relaxing into the position as Sam gave you a reassuring smile across the table. You gave him a small wave in return, finding the mixed drink in your cup taste better the longer you worked at it.

Some time passed, but nothing too interesting ensued. No further words were shared between you and Jake, but you did occasionally find yourself talking across the table with Sam, and a few times you were leaned over close to Danny to hear him over the chattering crowd and loud music. Then, something incredibly familiar reached your ears, the sound soothing as it drifted from the guitar in Jake’s lap and over towards you. The twang was different, a little more calm as he played on the acoustic, but it was still just as good.

Green River.

You turned your head towards him, smiling as you watched his fingers pluck the strings. You bit your tongue, tempted to sing along but knowing it likely wouldn’t help the lingering tension between you and the boy. Your gaze flickered to his face, curious to see his expression as he played the song you very clearly expressed your enjoyment of. To your surprise, he was looking at you, and the usual scowl on his face had softened into an almost smile.

He wanted to know if you liked it, almost excited at the prospect of impressing you with the song.

Perhaps Sam was right, and you hadn’t tried hard enough to get to know him. You weren’t committed enough to getting through the tough exterior, because in that moment, you saw a tiny glimpse of the Jake you saw that night in the bathroom. His eyes were warm, glimmering with curiousity as he continued to strum the tune. Maybe he wasn’t so against knowing you, but rather needed some common ground so he could get his footing.

No matter the reasoning, you could go along with it, because without the cold undertones in his expression, he was a million times more attractive than he’d ever been before. The liquor in your cup was strong, definitely encouraging your thoughts about his pretty face, but as he played a song you remembered from the happiest days of your childhood, it struck something within you that he’d never touched before.

“Sing it.” Jake encouraged, his voice just loud enough for you to hear as he played the intro a second time through. You thought you misheard him, unable to believe he was really initiating such a fun moment that involved both of you, together. Even as you tried to discredit it, his eyes told you otherwise, imploring you to do as he asked.

“Well, take me back down where cool water flow,” you began, knowing your intoxication had everything to do with your courage. You worried that he would change his mind, or regret asking you to do so, but as you finished he played the little riff that followed, a genuine smile beginning to blossom on his lips.

“Let me remember things I love, Lord

Stoppin' at the log where catfish bite

Walkin' along the river road at night

Barefoot girls dancin' in the moonlight.” You sang the verse, growing more comfortable when Sam joined in along the way. By the time you finished the last line, Danny was leaned in close behind you, also belting the lyrics alongside you.

Then, the most shocking part of it all came about when Jake led you back into the second verse. He joined in, happily singing along with the three of you as if it were a completely normal thing for him to do.

“Fuck yeah, Jake!” You exclaimed, seeing his eyes brighten at your drunken cheer. For a single moment, things felt normal. They felt right, with you cheering him on and him trying not to laugh at your antics, like it was meant to be that way all along.

Maybe Sam was right, and the two of you could click well, even after all the time spent ignoring each other.

He led himself into a small guitar solo, seemingly trying to show off as he slammed the pick down on the strings. You clapped along, a blinding smile lighting up your face as you watched him do what he loved most. You couldn’t help but admire how stunning he looked, his pink lips slightly damp from his tongue running over them while he focused. The blush of his cheeks under the lowlight, and his dark lashes casting the tiniest of shadows under his eyes. He was beautiful, and you couldn’t seem to pull yourself away from him.

You were so immersed in his enigmatic nature that you failed to sing along with the group when the third verse rounded. Stunned and slightly nervous that someone had caught you amidst the impromptu staring contest, you cleared your throat and joined in with the singing, only slightly less enthusiastic. When the song finished, you were breathless and in a mess of jumbled thoughts, but it had nothing to do with the singing you were doing. Before Jake could say anything to you, you downed the last of your drink, reaching into your bag to refill the cup. You knew you would need the courage, especially now that the relationship between you seemed to hit a pivotal moment.

When you straightened back up in your seat, you sipped from the rim of the cup to lower your chances of spilling it all over yourself. Your eyes flickered to the man beside you, but to your dismay, he wasn’t looking at you at all. The smile faded from your lips as you quickly tried to cover up your growing disappointment, wondering if you were an idiot for thinking the two of you might be more comfortable speaking. You waited for a moment, just to see if he would initiate something, but you were met with nothing once again.

You were an idiot, and for more reason than just that. You were ridiculous for believing that he would be interested with you, in all of his blinding beauty and amidst the rockstar lifestyle. He had girls falling at his feet, prettier and with more to offer than you had. You were breaking your own heart by entertaining the feeble idea Sam planted in your mind, and you needed to realize the truth of the matter.

Still, a small fizzle of hope existed within your chest, and you thought you would give it one last shot.

“That was really good, Jake. Thank you for playing it for me.” You said, keeping your tone sweet and the look in your eyes warm despite the blossoming uncertainty in your stomach.

“What? I didn’t play it for you.” The words tumbled out of his mouth at the speed of light, defensive and with little thought put into them. As if he saw the breaking of your heart before his own eyes, he softened slightly, realizing that his words were too harsh, even for his normal brooding self. “I played it for myself, too. I love that song.” He added, hoping that it would lessen the blow. You could tell he only said it to feel like less of an asshole, and it only worsened your already bruised feelings.

You could feel an unfamiliar feeling rising in your chest, one that craved conflict. You thought that if you handed his rudeness back to him, he’d learn his lesson and realize how terrible he’d been to you over the years of knowing him. You wanted a fight, to figure out the real reason behind his dislike for your company, and you needed it now. If he hated you, you wanted him to come clean and say it. You were sick of trying to start a friendship with someone who only ever made you feel like shit about it.

Then, before the accusations could leave your lips, he spoke again, but you would have preferred him not to say anything at all.

“Heard it’s supposed to be really nice out, tomorrow.” He forced the weather forecast through his teeth, rubbing salt into an already lethal wound.

“Perfect,” your lips pulled together tightly, forcing some semblance of a smile as you nodded your head. “You know, we don’t have to talk about the weather every fucking time we speak, Jake.” He seemed to physically recoil from your nasty tone, seemingly never expecting something even slightly vicious to leave your tongue.

“Okay, what else would you like to talk about, Y/N?” He asked, a hint of condescension in his words. You rolled your eyes, long past furious with his blatant rejection of your presence.

“Maybe one of the fifteen other topics I’ve tried to talk about with you?” You offered the alternative like it never crossed his mind at all. “You know what? Nevermind. Doesn’t matter.” You shook your head, understanding you were preparing to fight a losing battle. When it came to anything negative, Jake was always going to come out on top.

“What, did Little Miss Sunshine finally hit her breaking point? Is this the first time you’ve ever been angry, sweetheart? ‘Cause it wouldn’t fuckin’ surprise me.”

“Fuck off, Jake.” You huffed, leaning forward and grabbing your bag from between your legs. “Like I said, fucking forget about it.”

Just as you did so, Danny leaned towards you in an instinctive reaction to someone playfully pushing him by the arm of the couch. His shoulder collided with your back, causing you to lurch towards Jake and at the same time, your full solo cup to slip from your fingers. As you tried to recover from the strong (and irritatingly painful) collision between your back and Danny’s shoulder, you barely noticed the liquid that had spilled from your hands onto the couch, and unluckily, Jake’s leg.

Before you could process all that happened in such a short time, you heard Danny’s profuse apologies from over your shoulder, but not well over the boom of Jake’s voice.

“Christ, Y/N!” He exclaimed, raising the guitar from his lap as he made a move to stand. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Watch what you’re fucking doing, next time!”

His words, equal to a million stabs in the chest, seemed to snap that little rational part of your brain you tried to desperately hold on to when in his company. Instead of an angry outburst, you felt tears well in your eyes, finally fed up with his irrationally irate attitude towards you. You tried to muster an ‘I’m sorry’, but every time the words began to make their way through your throat, your muscles constricted around them. Instead, you grabbed your things, in a hurry to get out of there and never come back. Before you were on your feet, tears spilled over on your cheeks, and your face felt like it was on fire. Your heart was thumping so fast and hard you could feel it in every part of your body, and your throat ached to cry out.

Why didn’t he like you?

What did you do to deserve such miserable treatment?

Why couldn’t he just pretend to tolerate you, instead of making it blatantly obvious to everyone how much he hated you?

You clutched your empty cup and your bag tightly to your chest as you stepped over Danny’s legs, your vision blurred with tears you refused to let Jake see as you rushed away from the group. By the time you made it to the stairs, you knew you would be alright, so long as you didn’t come face to face with him again. You clambered to the top of the stairwell, pushing through bodies in search of the front door. You were desperate for air, just for a breath of relief to help you forget about his venomous tone. When your fingers clasped around the doorknob, you instantly felt better. You pulled it open, stepping foot into the yard and away from the chaos.

The porch was near vacant aside from the couple engaging in a handsy makeout session a few feet away, but not even they seemed to notice you. You pulled the skirt of your dress down as you stepped forward, crouching down until your ass hit the wooden step. You released your hold on the short dress, stretching your legs out as you adjusted to a more comfortable position on the stair. You let your hand run through your hair, your fingers catching on knots as you combed through the mess of loose curls. You let out a shaky sigh, wiping the tears away from your cheeks as you let your eyes flutter closed.

You wouldn’t let him get the best of you, even though it was so easy for him to do it. You were better than his short fuse and lack of regard for your feelings, and you wouldn’t feed into the fire he created. As much as you wanted to yell, to call him out on his ridiculous behavior, it wasn’t you. You weren’t angry; you were bubbly, happy and outgoing, and you adored making new friends. You were a social worker who loved children because of their unusual glee despite being in horrible situations. You loved it so much, because that’s who you were. You loved being happy, the light shining in darkness even when you should be miserable and sad. You liked being that beacon of light for others, and you made it a point to remember small details so nobody ever felt forgotten.

You were kind hearted and free spirited, and you loved to love. You wouldn’t let him take that away from you, in all of his gruff grumpiness and dark brooding eyes. You were human, and everyone likes to be liked, but you didn’t care anymore. If he wanted to dislike you, that was fine, because you loved being you and you didn’t care to change for anyone. If he didn’t like your behavior, your desperation to see the best in everything and your constantly joyus nature, he was the one losing, not you. You wouldn’t bend your own boundaries to make someone like him happy.

The door creaking open behind you pulled you from your thoughts, making you peek over your shoulder to investigate the disturbance. You were met with a sight for sore eyes, the pure chaos of the moment putting a smile on your face despite your own internal struggles. Sam was stumbling towards you, his eyes heavy and glossy as he clutched a beer bottle tight in his hand. He was positively hammered, and you could tell with every step he took.

His stare landed on you, like he was a predator in search of prey. His hand holding the bottle raised, his index finger straightening and pointed in your direction. “Was looking for you, knockout. You’re fast.”

“You’re drunk, Sam.”

“Pshh,” he scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Tell me something I don’t know.” He took a few unsteady steps towards you, placing his hand against the railing to steady himself as he sat down beside you.

“I love you, you know.” You smiled, hugging your knees to your chest as you rested your chin atop of them.

“I love you, Y/N.” He slurred, the smell of alcohol radiating from him. In some strange way, drunken Sam had always secretly been your favorite, mostly because of his unapologetic nature when it came to the tellings of his heart. “You’re the best friend ever, you know. Like the best. Couldn’t imagine life without you.” He rambled, slinging his arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer to him. “You’re always so sweet and kind, and you make the best cookies, and you come to my stupid parties and talk to my stupid brother, even when you don’t want to. There’s nothing wrong with you, Princess. Don’t listen to him, ‘cause he’s stupid.” He reiterated the same sentiment, causing a small giggle to fall from your lips.

“F’course I show up to your parties, Sammy.” You whispered, leaning your head against his shoulder. He smelled familiar, giving you a sense of home you couldn’t find anywhere else. “Wouldn’t imagine life any other way.”

“And everyone loves you, Y/N. Josh, and Danny, and even Jake. ‘Specially Jake.” He hiccuped, smiling at the thought. The apples of his rosy cheeks were so soft in the moonlight, the sight heartwarming and forcing a smile onto your cheeks, too.

“No, I don’t think he does, Sammy boy, and that’s okay.” You whispered, gazing up at the stars and living in the sweetness of this moment rather than the bitterness of the one you shared with Jake.

“No, don’t think you get it, Princess.” He chuckled, his head toppling over onto yours as he heaved a large breath. He was caught in a nasty bout of hiccups, and his movements were all sloppy and loose. You were beginning to realize he was much more intoxicated than even you perceived him to be, and you were going to have to get him inside and to bed soon. “I can’t tell you, cause he wouldn’t like that, but he likes you, Y/N, wholeee hell of a lot.” He put the extra emphasis on the words to ensure you took him seriously. You laughed at his words, his oxymoronic statement, and the tone in which he said it.

“Sure, Sam.” You chuckled, pulling away from him slightly. You immediately missed the comfort of his touch, but you knew it was for the best. “Why don’t we get you upstairs, honey? Maybe a glass of water?”

“You think?” He asked, squinting at the porch light as he turned to look at you. His expression was challenging, but you both knew you’d win the fight.

“I know, Sam.” You gave him a soft smile. “Come with me?”

“Okay.” He huffed, nodding in agreement. “You’re staying tonight, right? Don’t want you… driving home…” there was a lull in his tone, and you noticed his eyes drooping lower the longer he spoke. “Jake’s an idiot, want you to stay, even if you’re mad at him… please?”

“Of course I’ll stay, love.” You promised, rising to your feet after ensuring you had a firm grip on his arm. “Come on, stand up for me.” You urged, pulling him only slightly from his sitting position.

“Kay,” he let out a shallow sigh, helping you only slightly as you pulled him to his feet. As soon as he was standing, he stumbled forward into you, and you wrapped your arms around him to keep him upright.

“Easy, honey.” You hummed, only slightly intimidated under his body weight.

‘You’ve got this. Get him upstairs and into bed. You can do it.’ You repeated to yourself, carefully moving your grip so you had one arm securely around his torso.

“Come on, Sammy. Help me out here.” You pleaded, taking a step towards the door. He seemed to be growing more tired by the second, and you worried that you would not be able to support his weight if he grew any more lax in your arms. He stumbled forward, uttering nonsense about his love for you as you desperately tried to get him to the door. You figured if you at least got him inside, someone would be around to help you out with the rest.

You felt your legs quivering under his and your own weight, but you managed a few more steps forward until you were just shy of reaching the doorknob. As you ushered him forward, you reached a shaky hand out for the door, only to find someone else already opening it for you. You looked upwards, relief flooding your features until your gaze landed on the body in the doorway.

“Let me help.” Jake grumbled, stepping forward to join the two of you.

“It’s fine, Jacob. I’ve got it.” You snapped, taking another step forward.

“Clearly not, sweetheart. Quit being so fucking stubborn.” He argued, taking post at Sam’s other side as he guided his arm over his shoulder.

“Jake!” Sam exclaimed, a lazy smile crossing his face as he recognized his brother's familiar face. “Y/N, this is my idiot brother Jake. Have you met before?” Sam looked in your direction, sending you a lazy smile and a sloppy wink. You stifled a giggle as you tightened your hold around him.

“Hey, brother. Let’s get you to bed.” He chuckled, anchoring his own arm around Sam’s back alongside yours.

Deciding it was for the best, you let Jake help you with the daunting task. Together, the journey was much less treacherous, and you had him upstairs in no time. In Sam’s bedroom, you and Jake eased your hold on him as he sat down in his bed, his eyes threatening closed as he slumped down onto the mattress.

“I’ve got it from here, thanks.” You snipped, brushing past Jake to grab a trash can, just in case Sam started to feel sick.

“He’s my brother, Y/N. I can take care of him.” He shot back, fixing the pillows so Sam could lay down.

“We’ll he’s my best friend, and I’m not fucking leaving him.” You huffed, helping Sam lay down on his side so he would not fall asleep on his back.

“Guess you’ll just have to deal with it, then, cause I’m staying too.” He rolled his eyes, plopping down on an armchair in the corner of the room.

“Great.” You muttered, fixing the blankets as Sam fought with the buttons on his shirt. “You okay, honey? I can help.” You offered, noticing his particularly annoyed expression as he couldn’t complete the task he’d set out to do. “Can you get him some water, Jacob?” You asked, a little more curt than you intended, but neglecting to feel remorseful about it.

“Why don’t you go, and I’ll get him out of his shirt?” Jake offered, malice fleeing him temporarily in hopes the arrangement might be more comfortable for you.

“Fine.” You sighed, stepping away from the bed and back into the hallway. A quick trip downstairs and one bottle of water later, you were back at Sam’s bedside, trying to get him to sip away at a hydrating alternative to the beer he was drinking all night.

You sat on the edge of the bed, watching as Sam relaxed against the mattress and melted into the pillows. Carefully, you reached out and brushed his hair from his face, gathering it in your hands as you slipped an elastic around it from your wrist. You couldn’t help but smile as he began to softly snore, a sure sign he was out for the night.

“Thank you, Y/N.” Jake said, his tone strong and startling you as you pulled your eyes away from Sam.

“For what?”

“For caring so much about him.” He shrugged, showing you a glimpse of himself as he professed his gratitude. “He’s my brother. Means a lot to me that you love him so much.”

“Don’t need to thank me for it.” You shrugged. “Hard not to. He’s the best friend I’ve ever had.” The two of you fell into a silence for a moment, the tension in the air thick and uncomfortable. You wondered if he would apologize, rectify the harsh words he’d thrown your way, or if maybe tonight would be the night he finally confessed how much he hated you. Or, maybe it was neither of those things, and the night would take the worst turn of all; the two of you sitting there, caring for a drunken Sam in awkward silence and sharing occasional words. Perhaps you could even talk about the weather.

“So when are you two gonna tie the knot?” Jake asked, his arms crossed over his chest as he watched you carefully.

“What?” You asked, looking over at him with confusion written all over.

“Everybody’s thinking it. We’re just waiting for you to get on with it.” He said, his gaze never leaving your face, almost as if he was challenging you.

“I don’t like Sam like that, Jake. He doesn’t feel that way about me, either.” You were firm with your response, ensuring he understood that.

“Right.” He whispered, muttering something under his breath you couldn’t quite catch. Your eyebrows furrowed, curious about his words but unsure if you even cared enough to ask. You turned back to Sam, running a gentle hand over his arm as he slept soundly. As you did so, you could feel Jake’s eyes burning into you, making you shift uncomfortably in your position. Eventually, it became too much to ignore, and your head turned towards him again.

“What is your problem?” You asked, stronger than you intended.

“Nothing,” he defended himself, his lips turned down into a frown. “Am I not allowed to look at you?”

“Why would you want to?” You rolled your eyes, looking away from his face. You found it much harder to stay angry with him when you couldn’t stop thinking about how attractive he was. He opted not to respond to the topic at hand, but instead moved back to a previous one.

“Why don’t you and Sam get together?”

“Jesus, what does it matter?” You asked, answering his questions with more. You weren’t keen on discussing your romantic relationships with a man who barely cared enough to notice your presence in a room, and you definitely weren’t willing to discuss your relationship with Sam with him.

“You wanted me to talk, so I’m talking!” He argued, keeping his voice hushed so he would not wake his brother.

“Yeah, I wanted you to talk three years ago, Jake.” You laughed, shaking your head as you did so, but the situation was not funny to you. You couldn’t believe him, and he continually managed to surprise you with his offputting comments and his vague remarks. “I wanted to know you, but you’ve made enough of an impression already, and that ship has sailed.”

“I’m talking now, Y/N.” He tried again, his voice softer but still seemed standoffish.

“I don’t want you to, Jake.” You clarified, realizing you’d rather sit in silence or talk about the sunny skies, now. “I don’t care. I used to get upset because all you wanted to talk about was the weather, but I get that it is the only thing we have in common.” You stood, knowing you needed to take a step away from the situation before you exploded.

He was so good at getting under your skin, so different and so irritating. He ignored every one of your attempts at getting to know him, and you were over it. He didn’t get to be an asshole for so long and then suddenly change his mind about it, like he got to call the shots. The ball was in your court, and you weren’t willing to give him the time of day anymore.

“Wait,” he pleaded, holding his hand out to stop you from walking out on him. Ignoring his plea, you pushed past him, stepping towards the door with no intent on stopping. “Y/N, please.” He stood, reaching out to grab your arm so you could not leave.

“What, Jake?” You snapped, turning on your heel to face him. “Unless you’re going to tell me what your issue is, I have no interest in talking to you about anything.” There was a fire in his eyes unfamiliar to you, so different than the pained, distant expression he often adorned when looking in your direction.

“My issue is you!” He said, never dropping his hold on your wrist. It wasn’t tight, far from painful, but it was exhilarating. His skin on yours felt fantastic, even if he was an asshole.

“See? Was it that hard to finally fucking say it?” You fumed. “Just say you hate me, Jake. It’ll be so much easier for both of us!”

“It is hard, because I don’t hate you!” He confessed, taking you by complete surprise. “I couldn’t hate you, ever. Trust me when I say, I’ve fucking tried!”

“You don’t?” You asked, your knitting together in confusion. “Then what is your issue with me?”

“I don’t have an issue with you, Y/N. It’s me. It’s my problem.”

“Tell me Jake, please. I’ve spent so long wondering what I did to make you not like me, and I need to know.” You pleaded, your anger dissipating as you realized you finally might get an answer to the one question that constantly plagued you.

“Can we… Can we go somewhere else? Please?” Jake sighed, looking over his shoulder at his sleeping brother.

“Yeah, okay.” You nodded, stepping backwards and out of the room. He stayed close to you, ensuring Sam was alright before he closed the door behind him.

You led him down the hallway, turning into the guest bedroom that had become your very own. You stepped inside first, staying near the door as he walked in behind you. He knocked the door shut as he passed it, the music still booming downstairs and the crowd still plentiful despite the night changing into the early morning hours. You turned to face the boy, finding him already looking at you. His gaze was uncomfortable, especially knowing that there was so much unsaid between the two of you.

“So, what is it, Jake?” You asked, your arms loosely crossed over your chest as you tried to hide yourself under his stare. Now that the two of you were alone, your skimpy dress felt all the smaller, and you were self conscious knowing his eyes were drinking in every detail.

“I’ll tell you, but I need you to answer me first. Is there anything going on between you and Sam?” He asked, his palms pressed together and his fingers extended outwards, pointing towards you as he spoke.

“No, Jake. Not that it’s your business, but Sam and I are just friends; it’s always been that way, and it always will be.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes.” You stressed the point. “Why does this have anything to do with you not liking me?”

“It has everything to do with it, because I do like you!” He exploded, the sudden shift taking you by surprise. You recoiled at the strength of his words, watching him in shock for a moment.

“What are you angry about?” You asked, unable to piece together his erratic behaviour. His head fell back on his shoulders, a groan leaving his lips as he struggled to speak. It seemed as if his thoughts were plaguing him and he wanted to do anything other than confess them.

“I do like you, sunshine, and a lot more than you think.” He explained, drawing in a long breath and stepping towards you. “I like you too much, and I am a fucking idiot for treating you so badly, but I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Talk to me, Jake. Tell me what’s wrong, and we can work it out, together.” You pleaded, a shred of sympathy for the man taking hold despite all of your anger.

“See? That’s why, because after three years of me being a dick, you’re still trying to be nice to me!” He exclaimed, appalled at your concern and constant attempts to help fix things. “You should be yelling, or calling me names, or walking away, but you’re not.” He stressed the fact, hoping you understood what he meant.

“Is that what you want me to do?” You asked, confused by his response.

“No, I don’t want—“ he cut himself off, realizing how harsh and condescending the words sounded. “I love you, Y/N, and that’s why I can’t fucking talk to you, because I know I shouldn’t!” You were stunned, taken back by his bold confession and unsure how to respond to it. Your eyes widened, your lips parted as you breathed in his bare honesty hanging in the air. “I’ve spent three years falling for you, and it fucking kills me, but I can’t get you out of my head. Your perfect smile, and that cute little laugh, and the fact you care about everyone and everything, no matter what. You take care of all of us, all of the time. You’re funny, you’re smart, and you are way out of my league.”

You were so shocked at his confession that you forgot to breathe for a moment, and the fact he thought you were out of his league was laughable. You were in such a state that you didn’t think your actions through before responding, and an actual laugh fell from your lips. As soon as the sound reached your ears, your hand instinctively raised and clamped over your mouth, horrified that you made the sound in the first place. A flash of hurt crossed his face, the small expression telling you he regretted speaking at all. The laugh cut deep, but he was misunderstanding the intent behind it.

“You know what? Never mind. Pretend I never said anything at all.” He muttered, stepping towards the door.

“No, Jake.” You stepped forward, this time to stop him from leaving. “I’m not laughing at you.” You promised, your cool hand landing on his noticeably warm biceps. The soft fabric of his shirt felt good on your fingers, and an unfamiliar feeling blossomed in the pit of your stomach. “It’s just… I spent so long thinking you hated me. It’s a lot to take in. You have to understand that.” His eyes flickered back to you, then down to your hand on his arm. There was no longer any malice in his face, the softness of his features all the more alluring now that his defences were down. “Just… work with me, please?”

“Okay.” He whispered, turning back towards you slowly.

“I just… I think that you believing I’m out of your league is funny, because it couldn’t be further from the truth.” You explained, your voice quiet. The two of you were closer than you’d ever been, the heat of his body radiating from him. The sweet, intoxicating smell of his cologne you remembered so fondly from the night in the bathroom hit you with full force, skewing every one of your morals the longer you breathed it in. The drunken, desperate part of you was almost willing to forgo any tough conversation and have your way with him then and there, but you managed to stave off the urge for a little longer. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Why would I, Y/N?” He asked, frustrated by the thought, but much more calm now that he understood your feelings a bit better. “Why would I try to pursue you, when we both know that I’m no good for you?”

“No good for me?” You asked, inching closer to him in hopes you wouldn’t have to give up the contact with him.

“Yeah,” he nearly scoffed the word. “No good for you. Think about it, sweetheart. You are a ray of sunshine, all of the time. You light up a room wherever you go, and everyone falls in love with you without even trying. You’re a social worker, for gods sake. You’re so good that you help people for a living, with no benefit to yourself. You remember the small details, you never make anyone feel left out or forgotten. You’re good, and I’m not. I treated you like shit for three years because I couldn’t let myself drag you down with me. I didn’t want to do that to you, but I had to.”

“What are you talking about, Jake? You wouldn’t be dragging me down at all.” You wished he would hear how ridiculous his words sounded, but he was stubborn, and you knew that for a fact.

“I’m miserable. I’m mean, and I’m snarky when I don’t even want to be. I’ve got a temper, and I say things I shouldn’t. You don’t deserve someone like that. You deserve someone who’s just as happy as you are, who puts out just as much good in the world. You’re waking up at three in the morning to go to the hospital and help out a family in need, and I’m just passing out drunk on someone’s couch. You help people, and I hurt people, even when I don’t want to. You don’t deserve that, Y/N, and I can’t do that to you. I bit my tongue because I wanted you to fall in love with someone who could make you happy.” He explained, his drunken ramblings tugging at your heartstrings.

“Jake,” you whispered, your hand tightening on his arm to pull his attention towards you. Now that he started, he couldn’t seem to stop himself from talking. All that he held back for so long was finally surfacing, and it didn’t seem to want to slow.

“I wanted you to fall in love with Sam, because you two are great for each other. It would have sucked, but I know that you deserve someone who can love you like that. I hate myself for pushing you so far away, but I had to, for you. I didn’t want you to get involved with me, because you are too bright and shiny, and I’m a little bit broken. I don’t know how to love, I’m not good at it, and you should be with someone who can give you the world.”

“Hey.” You said, firm as you dropped your hold on his arm. You reached up, taking his cheeks between your hands and forcing him to look at you. “You don’t get to decide that for me. You don’t get to choose who is good for me and who isn’t, Jacob.” You said, swallowing hard as his brown eyes seemed to be staring into your soul. “You’re not broken, and you’re not bad, Jake. I’ve seen it before, and I’m seeing it right now. You have a big heart, and you care so much, even if you aren’t the best at showing it.” You breathed, looking over his face. Your heart was beating fast, your chest a mess of emotions you’d never quite felt before in your life. You were angry, confused, but also incredibly happy to finally hear the truth coming from his lips. You were oddly attracted to him in the moment, and you finally felt like the two of you were on the same page.

“I don’t like Sam that way, because I’m not looking for someone bright and shiny. I’m looking for someone who makes me feel something, and you do, and you always have. Why do you think I’m still trying so hard? After this long, I still want to be around you, and I still want to talk to you. I like being bright and shiny, and I like helping people. That’s who I am, and I can’t change that, but there’s nothing wrong with you, Jake. You said you’re ‘bad’, but how could you be? You spent three years putting me before you, because you didn’t want to hurt me.” You explained, begging for him to see reason. “What you just said to me, about how you feel… Jake, nobody’s ever said anything like that before. Nobody’s ever cared like that before.”

“I do care, and I definitely don’t hate you. I had to push you away, because every time I see you, I want to tell you how badly I need you. I tried so hard to get over you, but I can’t get you out of my fucking head.” At that, his hands raised to your hips, drawing you closer to him as he spoke.

“I’m not asking you to, Jake.” You said, your head spinning from the feeling of his hands on you. It felt so good, so unlike anything you’d ever felt before. Your hands were still on his cheeks, his face unbearably close to your own. After hearing everything he had to say, it made sense. All of the staring, his avoidance of being alone with you, the sweet moment in the bathroom. “I like you, in all of your grumpiness. I think you’re funny, and smart, and you are incredibly talented. I like that you play songs for me on the guitar, even if you don’t want to admit it, and I love that you love me so selflessly. You don’t get to decide if you’re no good for me, and you don’t get to force me to fall in love with someone else, because right now, I’m quite interested in knowing what it’s like to love you.”

“You can’t just say stuff like that, sweetheart.” He warned, his tone gravelly as his heart began to beat solely for you, for the moment you were sharing.

“I’m not just saying it. I mean it. After all this time, I’m still here, listening to everything you have to say.”

“I did play that song for you. I wanted to see you smile.” He confessed, almost pained at how badly he needed to see the joy written over your face. “I wanted to hear you sing it. I wanted you to sit next to me. I want it all, Y/N, all of the god damn time. I want you, but I don’t know how to do it right.”

“We can work on that part, because I want you too, Jake. I can’t walk away from you after you said all of that, because I don’t think I���ll every find anyone else quite like you. I don’t care if you’re grumpy, and I don’t care if you have a hard time showing how you feel. You’re not broken, and you’re not bad for me.” You felt your lips upturn into a small smile, noticing the blush of his cheeks and all of the small details you never had the chance to admire.

There was a splatter of freckles across the bridge of his nose, like a constellation gracing his tanned skin. His brown eyes were even more breathtaking up close, and the fullness of his lips were more tempting than they’d ever been. You wanted to lean forward, to taste the sweetness he’d been withholding from you. The stony expression you’d grown so used to finally melted away, and you could see why he always adorned it while around you. Now that his cover was blown, the mask was gone, and he was looking at you with nothing but love in his eyes.

He was still hesitant, nervous about tainting the perfection you carried around with you. He didn’t want to dim your light, and he didn’t want to hurt you anymore.

“Stop pushing me away, Jacob. I don’t want to be anywhere else, or with anyone else.” You whispered. “I don’t want to walk away and forever wonder what it would feel like to love you. I can’t keep replaying ‘what if’s’ in my head for the rest of my life, and I don’t want that for you, either.”

“I’m not good at this stuff, sweetheart.”

“We’ll never know if we don’t try.” You offered, gravity pulling your face closer to his. Your nose was brushing his own, the smell of whiskey on his breath apparent and inviting. You weren’t sure what he was doing to you, but you’d never been so overcome with emotion in your entire life. “I don’t need someone bright and shiny, Jake. I need someone that balances me out. I need you.” His grip on your hips tightened, the breath catching in his throat at the three little words he’d been longing to hear since he first laid eyes on you.

“You mean it?” He asked, raising one eyebrow in inquiry as he ensured you were certain about everything you said. He didn’t want you to wake up tomorrow and regret it, realizing you drank too much and that he was too much.

“I mean it, Jake. I need you.” You stressed your point, desperate for him to close the gap between your mouths and finally give you the satisfaction of kissing him. Many nights you spent awake in bed, angry about his behavior and unbelievably turned on at how much you liked it. You hated yourself for being attracted to his behavior, but now that it made sense, you didn’t need to feel that way ever again. All the shame was gone, dissolving into one, unbearable, undying need for him.

The two of you clicked, better than anyone else ever had before. Even when you were arguing, short with each other and trying your best to stay away, there was always something. Whether it be a lingering stare, an accidental touch, or a sweet moment when you least expected it, he never failed to capture your attention and you couldn’t seem to pull yourself away. He was infuriating, but you always seemed to come back for more, unable to refute his beauty and unable to resist the urge to know him. You couldn’t stand the idea of him disliking you, because you so badly wanted him to feel the same way about you. You wanted him to be caught up on you, curious about you and desperate to know more. You wanted him to be drawn to you in the same way, and you couldn’t handle him pushing you aside because your interest in him was driving you crazy.

“Say it one more time?” He asked, his lips just barely brushing over your own as he spoke.

“Please, Jake. I need you to kiss me.” You repeated, stronger than the last. Before the last word fully left your mouth, his lips were on yours and he was pulling you into him by your hips.

With your body pressed against his own, you felt all of the tension between the two of you finally subside. His lips were locked with yours, finally getting the satisfaction he’d been craving for so long. Your hands held his face, the touch tender and telling of your enjoyment. The tips of your fingers were tangled in the strands of his hair, the soft chestnut locks twisted around your fingers in a way you only ever imagined they would be. The taste of him on your tongue was addicting, even more so as his tongue swiped over your bottom lip, begging you to let him take it further. You parted your lips for him, feeling his tongue quickly take advantage of the opportunity you had given him.

He tasted as sweet as you imagined he would, the warm remnants of whiskey he was drinking still lingering on him. He was addicting, intoxicating, and he was driving you insane without even trying. His hands on your hips were rough but gentle all the same, holding you tightly but cautious as if he thought he might break you. For the first time in your life, you were overtaken by greed, completely blind to anything other than your desire for him. The heat of his body as he held you to him, how perfect the two of you felt pressed together, was better than anything you’d ever felt in your entire life. His heart was beating hard against his chest, in time with yours as the two of you melted into one, cohesive mess for each other.

You let a moan slip out into his mouth, unable to hide your enjoyment for the moment. You felt his fingers tighten on you as he drank in the sound, surviving off of the sweet noise and locking it up in his heart for safe keeping. He pulled away from you, breathless with stars dancing in his eyes as he looked down at your face. His lips were swollen, the slight pout that so often made an appearance was nowhere to be found. He looked stunning, and you couldn’t believe he felt such a way about you.

“Hard for me to behave myself when you sound like that.” He huffed, his pupils growing large as he continued to study your expression.

“Who said you had to behave?” You asked, a sparkle of mischief shining in your eyes.

“Fuck, baby.” He groaned, your words hitting him harder than you thought they would.

He reached down, his hands landing on the back of your thighs as he lifted you in one swift motion. You locked your arms around his neck, your stomach twisting with excitement as you wrapped your legs around him. As he pressed his lips to yours again, he took a step forward. You were so immersed in the feeling of kissing him that you barely registered the chill that ran through you as he pressed your back up against the wall. With his newfound leverage, he pressed himself further into you, your hips meeting his as he kissed you. The intensity of the moment grew tenfold, especially with the new position.

The burning sensation in the pit of your stomach had prompted an ache between your legs that was becoming harder to ignore the longer he kissed you. Your dress had ridden up your thighs, resting just below your hips now. You quickly understood that you were not the only one with a growing problem, and you could feel his own desperation as your clothed cunt met with his cock through his pants. You could feel his entire length against you, and as much as you loved the feeling of kissing him, it made it incredibly hard to think about anything else.

His strong hands held your thighs, never letting you believe he’d drop you. He had you pinned against the wall, leaving no room for you to escape, and you were happy with it; there was nothing in the world that could stop you now, especially after feeling the euphoric affect of his touch. He was overwhelming entirely, but in the best possible way. You couldn’t even manage to form a coherent thought about anything other than the way he was making you feel, and you were eager to explore the possibilities the night held.

You tangled your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, allowing yourself to fully embrace how good he was making you feel with such a small amount of effort. His hands felt like they were burning into your skin, the touch melting into you, and his chest pressed against yours felt right. The scent of his cologne lingered in the air, filling your senses every time you had a chance to catch your breath. Both of your lips were slippery, slick with saliva as he continued to kiss you, making even more of a mess. His lax attitude made it all the better, showing you that he was completely comfortable no matter how far you wanted to take it.

Perhaps the most pressing thought of all was how perfectly his hips met yours, and how badly you needed to feel it with less clothing in the way.

“Jake,” you breathed, parting from him as you rested your forehead against his.

“Could listen to you say my name like that for the rest of my fucking life.” He muttered, his tone gravelly and his gruffness making a return. This time, instead of irritating you, it sent a wave of pleasure straight through you. In an instant, you understood that his strong personality extended far beyond the realm of casual conversation, and you were eager to see it in action in a whole new way.

“I want you, baby.” You said, the words falling from your lips in a whimper. The need for him completely overtook you, in a way you almost didn’t believe possible. An hour ago, you were furious with him, convinced that he hated you and wanted nothing to do with you. Now, you were digesting the fact that no touch had ever felt so good, and you would do anything to be under him, just for a night. “Please.”

“Tell me what you want, beautiful.” He said, looking over your face with a fire in his eye that you ignited. It felt good to be looked at in such a way, like the whole world turned just for you. “Tell me everything.” He ordered, willing to comply with every one of your wishes, but wanting you to give him every one of the details.

“I want it all, Jake. I want you.” You explained, feeling his hips push forward. The pressure of his cock against your aching clit gave you a hint of relief, but it wasn’t enough. “I want you to make me feel good. I want you to touch me.” You pleaded.

“What else, gorgeous?” He asked, his lips ghosting over your jaw. You let your head fall back against the wall, giving him access to any part of you he wanted. His lips placed kisses along your jawline as he awaited an answer, sloppy as he began and growing even more so as he continued down to your neck.

“I want you to fuck me, Jake.” You confessed, free of any shame over the fact. “I need you to fuck me.” You corrected yourself, your desire pulsing under your skin as his tongue traced over the artery in your neck. He could feel your heartbeat on the tip of his tongue, your very life source offered to him on a silver platter. He pressed his lips to the pulse point, drinking in the desperation in your tone as he suctioned his lips around the very spot. Your eyes fluttered closed as he applied the slightest bit of pressure, focusing his attention there for a moment until he pulled away.

His eyes raked over the sight, the skin pink and irritated from his lips and darkening by the second. A perfect circular mark to remind you of him with every beat of your heart.

“I guess even a perfect little thing like you has some secrets to hide.” He rasped, his pupils consuming his irises as lust worked to craze him. “Tell me how you want me, angel, and I’ll give it to you.” You watched him carefully, your cheeks flushed and your skin hot. Your nipples were hard, pressed against his chest as he spoke to you. Every time he moved, the friction sent another rush of arousal straight to your core. Your skin was tingling, your excitement reaching every nerve ending and sending goosebumps prickling over your skin. “Tell me how you want me to fuck you, sweetheart.” He spoke again, trying to pry the dirty confession from you.

You had thought about it many times, but one thing you never seemed to consider was that in every fantasy, you got off from the simple idea of him doing whatever he wanted to you. Now, after experiencing touch from his hands, you felt that way more than ever before. No matter what he did to you, you knew you were bound to enjoy it.

“That’s it, beautiful? You want me to fuck you however I want?”

“Yes,” you nodded, excited just at the prospect. You looked over his face, piecing together every bit of information you knew about him. He was blunt, honest, and he liked to be in control. You couldn’t imagine sex with him being any other way than that, and you were eager to please him. If it was something as simple as that, you had no issue giving him the chance. “I just want to make you feel good, baby.”

The words seemed to cause a short circuit in his brain as he processed them. His hands tightened on you, his cock pushing forward into your cunt even further and his breath caught in his throat. He studied you for a moment, quiet and concentrated as he tried his best to figure you out. After a moment, his lips upturned into a devious smirk.

“Have you thought about me like this before, sweetheart?” He hummed, smug as he asked you the invasive question. Your cheeks burned red, your heart beating faster than normal as you quickly tried to find a cover up for the truth. Then, you realized you didn’t really care at all. You had thought about him in that way, and you had no reason to be embarrassed about it at all.

“I have.” You gave a slight nod, confirming his suspicion.

“And you got off to that? The thought of being my little fuck toy?” He pressed further, his intent to get you to admit to the dirty little fantasy. Although you wouldn’t have worded it quite the same as he did, the sentiment was the same, and you did get off on that thought alone. “Don’t be shy now, baby.” He said, his fingers snaking up the skirt of your dress.

“I did,” you whispered, biting down on the inside of your lip as you waited for him to respond.

“And you’ve been keeping that to yourself all this time?” He asked, his nose brushing against your jaw as his lips ghosted over your neck again. You squirmed under his touch, the feeling of his hot breath on your skin driving you insane. The tips of his fingers found your hips, settling just below the elastic waistband of your underwear.

He was going to be the death of you, and you were certain of that.

“Let me get this straight, angel.” He contined, pressing a delicate kiss to the sensitive spot just below your ear. A breathy wine pushed past your lips, your entire body ablaze with desire and desperate for him to do something other than tease you. “Did you like it when I was mean to you?” His words were soft, carefully treading the topic as he continued to gently rock his hips against your own. The dry friction was enough to keep you sane, but nowhere near what you needed. He took your silence as enough of an answer, smiling against you as you contined to try and move your hips further down on him. “Never would have guessed that Little Miss Sunshine likes to be treated like a whore.”

“Oh, fuck.” You whimpered, your eyes squeezing shut as you tried to press your thighs together to get a bit of friction. So strung out on desire, you didn’t even realize that all it was doing was pulling him further in to you.

“I bet that pretty cunt is such a mess for me, isn’t it?” He asked, pulling you away from the wall and stepping towards the bed. His hands were on your ass, firmly holding you so you did not have to fear him dropping you.

His cockiness was infuriating in any other context, but in the moment it was sending you feral. You were a shell of who you were earlier that night, the only thing fuelling you was your lust for the man below you. You were desperate, willing to do anything to have him, and finally coming to terms with the fact that your secret fantasies about him had nothing on real life.

“Answer me.” He growled, his fingers tightening on you as he drew your attention back to his question.

“Fuck yes, Jake.” You rushed out, feeling guilty for leaving him hanging.

“You want me to take care of that ache between your legs? Make you feel all better?” He asked, his eyes flickering to your face.

“Yes, please.” You nodded, meeting his gaze with doe eyes that seemed to drive him crazy. With that, he dropped you down on the mattress, the impact lessened by the springs bouncing you back upwards.

“You want me to take care of you, we do this my way.” He said, now gazing down at you with a slight sneer on his face. “Sound good to you, angel?” You nodded, never daring to look away from him. “First off, you refer to me as sir.” He waited until you processed the information before speaking again. “You answer when spoken to.” He added.

“Yes, sir.” You nodded. A small smirk turned his lips at the sound of your response.

“And the last one,” he crouched down, eye level with you to ensure you understood the importance of his rule. “Don’t ever, under any circumstance, be afraid to tell me to stop.” At that, a smile turned your lips, and he reached up to cup your face. “Okay?”

“Okay.” You nodded, your eyes fluttering closed at the feeling of his thumb drifting over your cheek.

“As for me, I’m going to enjoy this no matter how it goes, so tonight’s an apology for how poorly I treated you.”

“It’s okay, Jake.” You assured him, feeling slightly sad that he felt the need to settle the score. “You don’t have to apologize for anything.”

“I want to, ‘cause you deserve so much more than that.”

“Okay.” You breathed, nodding against his gentle hold. His thumb drifted downwards, caressing the smooth skin on your face until it landed over your bottom lip. He traced the outline, taking a moment to admire you and appreciate all he had. As he did so, you placed a kiss to the pad of his thumb, feeling an unfamiliar tug in your heart that did not match the energy the rest of the night held.

For some reason, in that moment, things finally began to sink in for you, and you finally saw him for all he was. He wasn’t just some angry man who was unjust and cruel. He was a person, with feelings that plagued him every day, feelings for you. He chose to push you away not because it would do any good for him, but because he wanted what was best for you. From that alone, you could see that he cared for you far beyond what anyone else ever had. In some strange, twisted turn of events, you could physically feel the pull of emotion in your chest, the blossoming feelings for Jake and all he was, including his pessimistic and avoidant attitude.

This was what was meant for the two of you. Not the fighting, or the avoidance, but this; a blatant and unashamed attempt to show each other how you felt. The whole time, he only wanted to love you, and you only ever wanted him to like you. You had no idea why you wanted him to like you so bad until the sweet words began to fall from his lips, and now you understood that you had always wanted him to be the one to say such things to you.

He was a mystery that you promised yourself you wouldn’t solve, but that’s exactly what you’d been trying to do all along. You started every conversation with the intent of turning it deeper, and you left empty handed and heartbroken because you always felt like there should have been something more between you. If you didn’t truly believe so, you would have quit a long time ago.

Instead of dwelling on the past, you allowed yourself to live in the moment. The rough pad of his thumb still rested on the delicate skin of your lips, and you did the only logical thing that was running through your mind; you parted your lips ever so slightly, pulling the digit into your mouth and letting it rest on your tongue. You suctioned your cheeks around it ever so slightly, your eyes fluttering up to meet his as you did so. His expression was deadly, his eyes focused on you as his jaw clenched and the familiar muscle in his jaw flexed. Slowly, you moved your head back, his thumb sliding from your lips and falling from your mouth with a faint popping sound.

A low groan rattled his chest, his eyes fluttering closed as his head fell towards the ground. You watched him, eyes never leaving him so you could soak up every bit of his energy. “You trying to fucking kill me, sweetheart?” He asked, the rhetoric meant to go unanswered as his hands landed on your hips.

He pulled your near the edge of the bed, settling himself on his knees before you as his hand grabbed the fabric of your dress. He bunched the material in his fists, sliding it upwards with help from you as you lifted your ass from the mattress. When the bottom of the skirt landed near your navel, he dipped his fingers underneath the elastic of your underwear, using the opportunity to pull them down your thighs before you returned to your earlier position.

With your ass resting on the edge of the bed and your lower half bare, he couldn’t seem to control himself any longer. This was a moment he thought about often, but never truly believed he would experience.

“Do you know how often I thought about you like this?” He asked, his fingers roughly guiding your leg over his shoulder. The sudden action knocked the breath straight from your lungs, causing you to clench around nothing just from the thought of what he would do to you. “How many times I wanted to bring you up here and have you all to myself?”

“I thought about it too.” You breathed, your stare locked in on his face as his eyes scanned the sight before him. He leaned forward, his lips brushing over the soft skin of your inner thigh. Carefully, he sucked a trail of marks all the way up to the top of your thigh, determined to ensure you would remember the moment long after it passed. You reached down, brushing the long locks of brown hair away from his face so you could see the whole sight with nothing standing in the way. “I thought about it all of the fucking time.” You let out a shallow breath, watching as his mouth turned inwards towards your cunt.

Your stomach twisted into knots as you watched his tongue dart over his bottom lip, the anticipation killing you the longer he withheld his tongue from you. Without any further words, he leaned forward, unable to wait any longer and let his tongue connect with your core. Starting at your entrance, he let his tongue flatten against you, slowly moving it upwards through your folds until it landed on your clit. He took in a sharp breath before moving his tongue downwards and repeating the action for a second time. When his tongue settled over your clit again, he moved away just for a moment.

“You taste so fucking good, angel.” He rasped, his fingers tightening on your hips as he savored the taste of your arousal on his tongue. It was even better, knowing that he was the reason behind it. “Just as sweet as I thought you would be.”

A pathetic little whine fell from your lips, your face burning and your heart pounding in your chest as he lowered his mouth on you again. This time, his tongue went straight to your clit, his actions full of intent. As soon as his tongue began to trace over the sensitive bundle of nerves, your entire body began to tremble. You tangled your hands in his hair, a shaky breath leaving your lips as he focused his full attention there for a moment.

It has been too long since you had sex, and everything he did felt so good. You were a mess for him before he ever took your clothes off, and you knew it wouldn’t take long before he had you exactly where he wanted you. Your eyes fluttered closed, your head falling back on your shoulders as he worked at you, drinking up every drop of arousal you had to offer. His tongue felt so soft, warm and wet against you, making every movement all the more fantastic.

The power he held over you was nearly incomprehensible. Never in your life had another person affected you so badly and deeply, in everything that he did. Every lingering glance, slight smile and even the roll of his eyes, he had you hanging off it and asking for more. Even when you thought he despised you, you couldn’t shake the temptation to reach out and try again, because even a miserable interaction with Jake was better than nothing at all. You were a fool to think that the same emotions wouldn’t carry over into sex, but with his mouth on you, working you up to an orgasm, you realized that there was nobody in the world quite like him.

He was snide, sharp-tongued and quick witted. He was an enigma, catching attention no matter where he was or what he was doing. You were so convinced he hated you because it was easier to believe than anything else; even then, with his hands on your hips and his mouth on your cunt, you could hardly believe Jake Kiszka was interested in you at all. To know he spent so long hung up on you, thinking he wasn’t good enough for you was nearly painful to imagine. He was everything, even when he wasn’t saying anything at all. He was the whole world, and it felt like you were just living in it, which was why it was so hard to exist without any type of relationship with him. You wanted Jake to know you, to like you, to think of you in the same way you thought of him when you had a moment to yourself.

He let out a hum against you, the vibration running through your whole body and furthering the waves of pleasure already washing over you. You let out a sharp moan, your fingers tightening around the locks of his hair. You laid back on the bed, careful so not as to disturb him while he worked. The new position gave you a bit more control over the motion of your hips, and a lot more pleasure. He took advantage of your new position, pulling your ass off the bed and closer to him so he did not have to lean so far forward.

He groaned against you, completely overtaken with desire and unable to hide his enjoyment as your hips moved against his tongue to meet his time. The fire in the pit of your stomach was growing at a rapid rate, taking over your entire body and causing your mind to jumble with thoughts of nothingness. You needed it more than you ever needed anything in your entire life, and he was quite aware of that as you bucked your hips forward despite his tight hold. He was encouraging you further with every flick of his tongue, and just as you thought you couldn’t take any more, he reached between your legs and added his middle and index finger to you.

Your hips jerked upwards in reaction to the curl of his fingers, which hit against the sensitive spot inside you every time he pumped them into you. You could feel him smirking against you, cocky and rightfully so as he realized how good he was making you feel.

“Oh, fuck.” You whined, your eyes squeezed shut as a particularly intense wave of euphoria took hold. Your abdomen was tense, just the same as your limbs. You felt like if you moved an inch, you would lose the pleasure he was so kindly granting you. “Jake, m’gonna cum.” You warned, feeling the sensation in the pit of your stomach grow stronger, snowballing as it spread across your skin.

He continued to pump his fingers in time with the movements, pushing you closer to the edge by the second. You pulled your leg casted over his shoulders inwards towards you, drawing him in further as he worked at you with intent. You could feel a sheen layer of sweat forming on your skin, glistening under the moonlight through the window to illuminate the sin you were engaging in. The obscenity of the display the two of you found yourselves in was a picture that would be framed in your minds forever, the memory of the event seeping into the walls and remaining there forevermore. You wouldn’t be able to rid the memory from your brain even if you wanted to, and that was okay by you, because Jake was the best that you had ever had.

With one last curl of his fingers, he sent you over the edge, the knot in your belly tightening and snapping under the pressure. Your walls squeezed around his fingers, pulling him in further as his tongue traced over your clit. You cried out for him, pleading for more and less all at the same time, pleading for mercy you knew he would not give. Your hands in his hair were pushing him away and pulling him closer all the same, and you had never felt so strung out on pleasure in your entire life.

“Oh, god.” You whined, your thighs squeezing around his head as he confined to work you through the climax. His hands on your hips, bruising the delicate skin made your heart beat only for him in that moment, living just from the generosity he was granting you and thankful to be his.

When your body relaxed against the bed, he slowed his movements, eventually pulling away from you. Although you were grateful that he didn’t push you to the point of overstimulation, you immediately missed the feeling of his tongue, grieving the loss as if it were something catastrophic.

To you, it was.

He slowly rose to his feet, his hand swiping your arousal from his chin before they dropped to his shirt, quickly unbuttoning it and throwing it to the floor. You looked up at him, in awe of his blinding beauty and unable to process anything further than that. He unbuckled his belt, pulling it from the loops in one swift motion and tossing it to the floor.

“Get up.” He ordered, his usual expression taking over his face again, but this time it seemed even more ethereal. You did as he asked, rising from the bed and to your feet. “M’sorry, angel. Been waiting so fucking long. I need to feel you.” He said, kicking his pants and his boxers to the side to join the rest of his clothes on the floor. He stepped towards you, your eyes trained on his body as you tried to sear the sight into memory forever. He was stunning, more than you ever thought he could be, and seeing all of him only made you realize how lucky you were.

His hands snaked under your dress, pulling the tight material over your head and tossing it to the floor. Now that you were fully naked, he took full advantage of the fact and let his hands wander over you as he pulled you in for a kiss. You could taste yourself on his tongue, the feeling sending you feral as the pad of his thumb brushed over your nipple. You wanted to tell him he didn’t need to apologize for anything, that you needed him inside of you just as bad as he did. As your hands roamed his bare torso, you understood you didn’t have to say a word because he could feel how badly you wanted him.

He guided you to the edge of the mattress, taking a seat in front of the vanity Sam had placed at the end of the bed. He sat first, keeping his hands on your hips as he guided you towards him. With a smile, you placed your knees on either side of him, keeping a hand on the back of his neck to steady yourself.

“God, you’re so fucking beautiful. Wish you could see yourself like this.” He muttered, his head craned upwards to meet your gaze as he lined himself with your entrance. The feeling of him against you was fantastic, only growing more so as he ran his tip your arousal. He bright his cock forward, guiding himself so he could slide over your clit. Your hips moved downwards in reaction to the feeling, in search of more. The pressure of him resting against you increased, only worsening your growing need for him. “Come here, gorgeous.” He muttered, carefully guiding your hips backwards. You felt him slide through your folds again, the sensation something so different than anything you’d felt before. When he settled by your entrance again, he couldn’t wait any longer to pull you down on him.

You both let out an audible sigh of relief as he pushed inside of you, the feeling of him filling you so fantastic that you needed to take a moment to appreciate it. You weren’t used to his size, but the stretch of your walls as he pulled your hips down to meet his was fantastic.

“So fucking tight,” he muttered, his nose brushing yours as your forehead rested against his own. “Feel even better than I imagined.” He confessed, his hands trailing up your torso and tickling your skin. You began to move your hips, starting with a slow pace while you both grew comfortable with each other.

You weren’t sure why, but the thought of him imagining the two of you in such a way was enough to get you off all by itself. It affected you so much, you couldn’t help but bring it up with him.

“Yeah?” You hummed, maintaining a slow roll of your hips against him. The ends of your hair tickled the skin of your back, tangling with his fingers as he held your chest to his. “You thought about me like this? Just like this?” You continued, adding a little extra force to your hips as you came down on him.

“All of the time, Y/N.” He said, one hand reaching around you and landing on your ass. His fingers tightened against you, his palm settling directly on the curve of your ass. “Thought about how good that pretty little cunt would feel wrapped around me every fucking night.” He confessed, leaning forward and capturing you in a kiss. He pulled your bottom lip between his teeth, biting down with just enough force to cause your hips to stutter while they moved against him. “Takes everything in me not to take you upstairs and fuck you every time I see you.”

“I thought about you too.” You whined, your eyes fluttering closed as you focused on the feeling of him inside of you. You were without shame anymore, knowing that the two of you were finally on the same page. He thought about you just as much as you thought about him, he wanted it just as bad as you did, and you felt no need to hide it from him.

“Yeah?” He asked, thrilled at the sound of your words despite already knowing as much. His hand on your ass was guiding you down further every time you moved your hips, adding just a little more pressure to the already overwhelming sensation. “Did you play with yourself while you thought of me, angel?” He asked, his lips hovering over your ear as he spoke. The low tone sent a shiver down your spine, and his warm breath on your skin sent goosebumps rising across your entire body. Your hand on his shoulder tightened, but you did not confirm or deny the fact. “Come on, don’t be shy.” He coerced you to answer, leaning forward and gently pulling your earlobe between his teeth. “Want to know all of your dirty little secrets, beautiful.”

“I-I did,” you stuttered, clenching around him ever so slightly. He was impossible to resist and denying him the truth seemed more painful than confessing.

“So I was the one keeping you up at night?” He asked, a little breathless as he spoke as if the idea sent him spiraling. “My name on your lips as you imagined it was me touching you instead? And I wasn’t even there to hear how fucking desperate you were.” He said the second part with a hint of disappointment, as if he was grieving the loss without ever knowing he missed out. “You’re breaking my heart, angel.” He muttered, pushing your hair away from your neck as he pressed a kiss atop the darkening marks he’d already left behind.

“M’sorry, sir.” You pleaded, unsure why you were apologizing but doing so because you were terrified he might stop. He was silent for a moment, his tongue grazing your skin. The saltiness on the tip of his tongue seemed to drive him mad, his stature rigid and his chest heaving with every breath.

“Turn around for me, sweetheart.” He said, ignoring your apologies as his eyes focused on the mirror in front of him. He felt selfish being the only one who could appreciate the view of the scene you found yourselves in.

You slowed your movements, pulling away from him as you complied with his request without hesitation. Slowly, you got to your feet, turning around so you were facing the large vanity mirror as well. He reached out, his hands landing on your hips as he guided you back towards him. You placed your legs on either side of him, feeling him reach between your bodies to line himself back up with you. Once he knew you were comfortable, he pulled your upper half towards him, your back pressed against his chest as he slowly lowered your hips onto him.

“Want you to see how pretty you look when I fill you.” He muttered, pulling you down until he filled up you completely. A shaky breath left your lips as the tip of his cock brushed against your g-spot, the sight almost too much for you to handle. He reached up, brushing your hair from your shoulders and pulling it all to one side. He draped it over one side of you, his chin nestling on the opposite shoulder as you began to move against him again.

With the new position, you could see everything. The furrow of his brow as he bargained with the pleasure of feeling you, his clenched jaw as he tried to keep himself calm, and more importantly, you could see him fucking into you, every time your hips raised and sank back down on him. It was almost too much to take, the sight so obscene yet so beautiful all at once. His hand snaked between your legs, his middle finger resting over your clit as he began to trace slow circles around it. Your legs trembled as you tried to keep a steady pace, the burning in your belly reaching a new level as you watched his lust-crazed eyes, never daring to look away from you.

“This is what you fantasized about, sweetheart?” He asked, making you understand the real reason he switched the position. He wanted you to remember, to know exactly what it looked like as he fucked you, so you had something to think about the next time your mind wandered when you were alone.

“Yes, sir.” You whimpered, your entire body ablaze with emotion. You’d never felt so good, and you’d never felt so alive. Sex with Jake was phenomenal, something so filthy that it only existed in the darkest depths of your mind, even when he wasn’t doing much at all. The closeness was enough to drive you insane, and the pleasure was enough to put you in the grave. His stern demeanor was infuriating outside of the bedroom, but seemed to further his charm as soon as his clothes were off.

“Want you to think about it every time you play with that pretty pussy.” He growled, his hips raising off the bed to meet yours in a moment of high emotion. You let out a muffled yelp, biting down on your lip to silence the sound as it passed through you. “If that’s still not enough, you just let me know. I’ll be happy to take care of her, whenever you need me.” He assured you, his teeth sinking into the skin of your shoulder. The miniscule pain from the action only furthered the knot tightening in your belly. You needed to let go, to show him how good he was making you feel. You needed it more than anything you’d ever needed in your life. The pressure of his jaw slackened, and you felt his tongue gently trace the skin his teeth had marked, soothing the slight irritation he left behind.

A moan fell from your lips, loud and telling of the surplus of pleasure coursing through your body. His finger continued to trace your clit, relentless and unapologetic as he tried to pry another orgasm from you. It was becoming harder to focus, the sensation quickly turning into the only thing you could think about. You watched his face in the mirror, studying the beauty of the man below you. He was concentrated, certain of what he wanted and unwilling to stop until he got it. As you contined to watch him, you understood that his eyes were no longer trained to your face, and instead his gaze had fallen downward, settled on the exact spot where the two of you met. Your stomach burned as you realized he was watching himself fuck into you, the simple idea pushing you just a little closer to the edge.

“You going to cum for me again, angel?” He asked, his tone sickly sweet as if you had a choice in the matter. He wasn’t going to stop until you did, and the question only served as a catalyst in his ever growing ego problem.

Perhaps you were the real catalyst in the equation, because you seemed to lack any self control when it came to him, and you wouldn’t dare deny him of a single wish.

“Yes, sir.” You groaned, your eyes closing and your head falling towards the floor. You felt like you had no control over your body, your movements only made to further the pleasure he was already giving you. It was necessity rather than want; you were tired, but you couldn’t fathom stopping. You wanted to exist in the moment for the rest of your life, never letting him go and never worrying about anything else.

“Look at me.” He growled, his hand raising to your face. He clamped your cheeks between his fingers, forcing your head back upwards to face the mirror. Your body was overtaken with euphoria by the harshness of his actions, the feeling of his hand tightly holding your face adding the extra little bit of pleasure needed to send you over the edge. “Watch how good you look when you cum for me.”

“Oh, fuck.” You whimpered, your movements stuttering as the sensation became too much to withstand.

“That’s it,” he rasped, continuing to hold your head in place. “That’s my fucking girl.” The possessive claim sent you spiraling, the term too much to bear in combination with everything else he was doing to you.

Your walls squeezed around him, pulling him in further and locking him there as your second orgasm washed over you. He raised his hips off the bed, continuing the same pace as your body froze in place. His finger on your clit never faltered, ensuring that you got the most out of the orgasm. He continued to whisper the sweet nothings in your ear, praising you for the show you were putting on as profanities fell from your lips. Your cheeks were red, your face hot as the sensation infiltrated every nerve in your body. Your eyes remained locked on the two of you, soaking in every detail as he worked you through the climax, admiring him as he remained so tentative as you unravelled around him.

Before the pleasure fully subsided, you could feel him shift underneath you. His finger moved from your clit, instead his hand holding your hips as he began to stand. He held you as he stood, guiding you upright with him without ever pulling out of you. Your mind was foggy and your limbs weak as you barely worked to help him, but he didn’t care about the lack of support. He was crazed enough from the look on your face that something superhuman took hold. He pushed you forward, closer to the vanity as his eyes stayed locked on your face.

You raised your hands to the cabinet, knowing his course of action before he ever began. You began to regain your wits at the same time as he pushed your upper half down towards the wooden surface. Your chest landed on the frigid surface, sending a shock through your body as you felt it. He reached upwards, his hand gathering your hair and knotting it around his fist as he began to move his hips. The new position allowed for much more freedom, and much more control. As much as he enjoyed the slowness as you grew familiar with the feeling of him inside you, he could only give up control for so long before he went insane.

“Being so good for me, sweetheart. Just a little bit longer, okay?” He pleaded, his hips slamming forward. A guttural moan tore through your chest, the pain and pleasure mixing together to create a whole new kind of feeling for you. You were tired, nearly fucked out and ready to go to sleep, but if he wanted it, so did you. You would do anything to please him and you would enjoy it while you did so.

“Y-yes, sir.” You complied, your eyes squeezing shut as you tried to fight of the irritating overstimulation trying so hard to take hold. “Whatever you want, sir.” You added, finding that talking was helping you come back to your senses a little more.

“Fuck, baby.” He hissed, his hand coming down on your ass with a force that sent your knees weak. The ring on his middle finger sent an aching pain across the flesh, but it was so addicting you barely thought twice about it. The stinging sensation spread across your skin, the redness already beginning to darken where his palm came in contact with you. “Take it so fucking good.” He praised, his dark eyes still watching your expression in the mirror. Your eyes fluttered open to meet his gaze, the desperation to please him evident and doing nothing but furthering the frenzy he was stuck in.

“F-feels so fucking g-good.” You gasped, stuttering the words out through a mess of moans. You raised your hips a little higher, sinking your upper half down so he could reach a whole new angle inside of you.

“Such a little whore.” He commented, tugging at your hair and forcing your head upwards. Your eyes raked over your reflection in the mirror, barely recognizing yourself so strung out on pleasure. “Do you like being a whore for me, angel?”

“I love it.” You confessed, your heavy-lidded stare burning into him. “Only for you, sir.” You added, ensuring he knew that now, he was the only one who would ever have access to that side of you.

“That’s right.” He affirmed your statement, his words gruff as his movements grew sloppy. He was being pulled in to the same euphoria you’d experienced at his hands only moments before, the sensation taking hold and growing impatient with him. He needed it, and after his generosity, you would do anything to get him there. “This is all for me now, sweetheart. Nobody else gets to see you like this.” A high pitched whine echoed through the room, confirming his feelings on the matter without any words needing to be spoken at all. You wanted to be his; you didn’t want anyone else to have you like that, ever again. He brought out a side of you that you barely knew to exist, and the thought of letting it go was grievous. “Do you understand me?” He growled, knowing you did but eager to hear it anyway.

“Yes, sir.” You panted, watching as wrinkles formed between his brows, showing you just how hard he was trying to hold back.

“Want to hear the words, baby.” He pressed further, his pace bruising and making it difficult to formulate the statement he wanted you to say. Another moan tore through you, your throat raw as it passed through. You were on the brink of another orgasm, so close but it seemed just out of reach.

“I’m all yours, sir.” You promised, pushing your hips back towards him to meet the time of his thrusts. As his cock slammed into your cervix, your knees went weak below you, threatening to collapse under your weight. He noticed the change in your posture, immediately slipping his arm under your hips to hold you upright.

No matter the circumstance, he wanted you to know that you would never have to worry about falling so long as he was there to catch you.

“Fuck, you feel good.” He let out a strained sigh, his face contorting into an expression of pleasure. He was close, but he wasn’t willing to give in until he gave you one last orgasm.

To you, the thought alone was ridiculous; after everything he’d already done for you, you couldn’t imagine him holding back any longer.

“S’okay, baby.” You breathed, catching his eye so he could see the sincerity in your face. “Want you to cum for me.” You said, your words hitting him like a brick. It seemed to cause a short circuit in his brain, the role switch sending him spiralling in an instant.

You could feel him pull out of you, both of you knowing he couldn’t push himself any further. Something seemed to take over you as he did so, unfamiliar but not unwelcome. You spun around, facing him and quickly dropping to your knees before him. You were nearly saddened at the thought of such an anticlimactic end for him, and the feeling forced you to take action as you moved your head forward and took him into your mouth. You could taste yourself on him as you bobbed your head down to take his full length, the simple fact causing the ache between your legs to worsen beyond anything it had already been that night. You missed the feeling of him inside you, but you were more eager to please him than you were to satisfy yourself.

He looked down at your face, shock written across his features as he processed your sudden change. It didn’t take long for the surprise to be forgotten, especially as his tip hit the back of your throat. His hand reached down, holding your hair in his hand so he did not have to miss a single detail of your face. The warm wetness of your mouth was just as inviting as your cunt, and the sensation furthered his pleasure as if he’d never pulled out of you at all. He didn’t want to push you, afraid that you might not be able to handle the same intensity in the newest position, but when you pushed your head further down on him and his cock slid down your throat, he quickly understood that you were willing to take whatever he wanted to give you.

His hips bucked forward in response to the feeling, and you forced yourself to swallow, your throat constricting around him and effortlessly sending him over the edge. At the same time, the most beautiful sound fell from his lips, gracing your ears and settling deep in the pit of your stomach.

For a moment, you felt like you could get off on the sound of his pleasure alone.

His posture slipped slightly as his orgasm washed over him, his release spilling down your throat as he held you to him. You moved your head against the force of his hand, your tongue moving against the underside of his cock as you swallowed back every last drop of him. A strangled cry left his lips as he pulled back, his hips jutting forward again as you ran your tongue over his tip. The saltiness lingered on your lips, making your mouth water and leaving you wanting more. In that moment, there wasn’t a single thing you wouldn’t do for the man standing before you.

“Get up.” He spat, his shoulders still heaving with his breaths. Your eyes flickered upwards, catching his gaze as you withdrew your head. His tip fell from your lips with a slight popping sound, and you couldn’t bite back the smirk forming on your lips. “You think you can do something like that and finish it there?” He growled, watching as you rose to your feet. He was not angry, and not a single part of his face gave you that impression. He was enamoured with you, unable to walk away without at least thanking you for the service, and he was completely beside himself with desire. “Turn around. I’m not fucking done with you, yet.”

You did as he asked, spinning back around to face the mirror. You sunk back to the position you were in moments before, your hands clamped around the edge of the wooden dresser. Instead of returning to his earlier position, he sunk to his knees similar to how you had done for him, his head between your legs and within seconds, his tongue connecting with your core.

He got straight to the point, so far gone he didn’t even care to tease you anymore as his tongue settled over your clit. Your hips moved back to meet his mouth, in desperate search of more and he barely even started. You were too far gone to care, much similar to him, and your body was still abuzz with the pleasure he had already granted you that night.

“Fuck, Jake.” You cried, your voice raspy and your tone breathy as your eyebrows knitted together in pleasure. His movements were different than before, more messy and much less calculated, but it almost made the entire ordeal even more enjoyable. The knowledge that he was completely feral for you alone was overwhelming, and the fact he was pleasuring you solely because he enjoyed it was something you’d never experienced before. “Please don’t stop, baby.” You pleaded, your heart thudding against your chest and your face hot with emotion. He moaned against you, assuring you he would never even dream of it. The sound appeared much more animalistic than it was before. His hands raised, grabbing your hips and pulling you back towards his face. He was working at you with desperation, like he needed it just as bad as you did.

Your stomach was tense, your legs trembling as his fingers bruised your skin. You were so close, too far gone to care about keeping yourself quiet and without a care in the world about the marks he was leaving on your body. You wanted to remember it, to wake up in the morning and see the dirty details of the night lingering on your skin. In days to come, you wanted to think of the night every time you took your clothes off, living in the feeling of being his just for a moment longer.

“Jake!” You cried, your knuckles white from your grip on the vanity. Your body ached with exhaustion, but you were in such desperate need of another climax that not even that could deter you. He hummed against you, the warmth of his tongue and the vibration of the sound working together to push you closer to the edge. You could barely think straight, your skin tingling with pleasure every time he moved. You worried that you might not survive the fall, the orgasm barreling towards you faster than you could comprehend. Then again, with him holding you, you had a lingering sense of comfort, like you could survive anything so long as he was there to support you through it.

With one last flick of his tongue, you were pushed over the edge and there was no coming back. A strangled whine tore through your chest, your legs locking in place as the sensation took hold. You were crying his name, begging him for something he couldn’t give, because not even you knew what you needed. He didn’t even think of moving away, working you through the process until you rode out the high, and even then he felt like he had to force himself away from you.

When you relaxed against him, you could barely keep your eyes open. You were so tired, so ready to curl up in bed with him by your side. You wanted to sleep soundly, so much so that you could forgo the conversation about what the two of you were and deal with it in the morning. You expected him to feel the same, but he rose to his feet with a whole new surge of energy overtaking him. Wordlessly, he helped you stand upright, spinning you around once more by your hips, but he didn’t let go this time. Instead, he lifted you up, similar to how he did earlier that night but with much more strength due to the lust working to his advantage. You wrapped your legs around him, exhausted but still able to comply to his demands. Your mind was elsewhere, your body working solely to please him as he held you to him with one hand. His other reached out, carelessly clearing the surface of the vanity with one swipe of his arm. The few items toppled over and landed on the floor, and he sat you down on the edge of it.

“I know you’re tired angel, but I need to feel you again. I can’t fucking help myself.” He explained, reaching between you and running his tip through the wetness still lingering between your legs. He was still achingly hard, in dire need of relief again despite his last orgasm only being moments before. Your eyes were drooping so close to closed, but as his cock drifted over your clit, your hips grinded forward into the feeling, in search of the very thing that might be the death of you.

Slowly, he thrusted himself forward, his dick falling into position and slowly pushing inside of you again. Unprotected sex was risky, especially after his previous orgasm, but neither of you seemed to care a bit about it, too desperate to be close to each other again. The sensation of him inside you was too much, the stretch of your walls as he filled you again so much more daunting than the last time. Still, despite your body screaming with overstimulation, you couldn’t deny how right it felt to have him so close.

“You can take it, baby. I know you can.” He encouraged, beginning a slow rock of his hips against you. The newest position allowed for a whole lot more intimacy, and you would be lying if you said you weren’t completely living for it. Your arms raised, locking around his neck and pulling him closer. “Being so, so good for me, baby.” He praised, his hands traveling over your bare back to pull your chest closer to him.

You were completely fucked out, and you had no idea how he was still going. You had a hard time imagining that you had such an effect on him, but the proof was in his actions. This time around, he was much more generous with his sweet side, and had much less control over the sounds falling from his lips. He was desperate, acting as if the control was in your hands despite his dominant aura, like he would die if he couldn’t have you for just a little longer. You never thought Jake Kiszka would be the one before you, pathetically needy and unable to resist the temptation, but you were so glad it ended up that way.

“Come here.” You muttered, pulling his face closer so you could kiss him. The taste of you on his lips still lingered, something that you were growing more used to as time went on. The sweetness of his kiss was nearly too much to bear, a pitiful moan slipping into his mouth as he continued to fuck into you. You were a mess for him, willing to let him do whatever he pleased. The best part about it was that he felt the exact same for you in the moment.

Your tongue glided over his bottom lip, begging for more attention from him. His lips parted slightly, allowing you to slip it into his mouth. The kiss was sloppy, the salvia shared between the two of you soaking your lips and coating the upper part of your chin, but it was addictive. The messiness of the action only made it even more so, and you couldn’t seem to get enough of him.

His chest was pressed against yours, his heart beat wild and matching your own. The dampness from the sweat on your skin caused the two of you to stick together, forcing you to stay in the position. His hands were grasping at your body, doing all he could to bring you closer than you could possibly get, and your hands were tangled in the mess of his hair. Neither of you wanted to break apart, so you stayed just like that for as long as you could.

As you continued to kiss him, the pressure in the pit of your stomach began to rise again, this time different than the last. It had little to do with his hips moving and everything to do with the connection you felt with him. His nose brushing against yours as he did all he could to continue the kiss was euphoric, and you couldn’t believe he wanted you so badly. After so long spent thinking he hated you, the feeling of him loving you was otherworldly. He was holding you with all of the emotion he’d kept locked up for so long, the truth coming out in a climactic and emotional manner. Your legs locked around his waist, pulling him further into you as he continued to fuck you.

For a moment, you felt like you had become one, cohesive being that survived solely off the beating of each others hearts.

You knew you were at the end, that you couldn’t possibly hold anything back. All of your willpower disappeared, your body doing as it pleased and your mind having no say over it. Without confirmation, you believed in your heart that he felt the same way as you did. He could feel the flutter of your walls around him, the telltale sign that you were close to another climax. He continued his pace, never thinking of stopping even for a moment. He needed to feel you in the most primal, visceral way possible.

“Come on, angel.” He muttered against your lips, upping the force in which he was fucking into you. “One more, baby. You can do it.” His voice was strained, like he was teetering on the same edge as you were.

“You too?” You asked, pulling away just enough so you could look over his face.

“Y-yeah,” he nodded, almost embarrassed over the fact. It only seemed to further the burning in your belly, and you wanted him just as bad as he wanted you. Neither of you cared about the consequences, only the intensity of the connection between you as he fucked you closer to the orgasm. In a permissive manner, you leaned toward and pulled him into another kiss, your mouth meeting his own and telling him everything he needed to know.

A groan rattled his chest as his hands fell to your hips, pulling you closer to him as he gave in to the feeling. You did the same, feeling your skin tingle with the intensity you’d felt so many times already. This time was different, more emotional and less physical, but it was a million times better than anything you had ever felt.

Together, the two of you reached the peak, muffling every moan and cry with your mouths. His stature faltered, falling over into you slightly as you held him tightly. Your entire body trembled as the euphoria overtook you one last time, and his hips stuttered as he pulled your hips forward onto him. For the second time, he spilled his release into you, unapologetic as he worked you through your own orgasm. Your body ached from the tension in your limbs, your ribs pained from your heart pounding against them. Your hands loosened on him as you relaxed, the moment passed you by almost as quick as it came.

Reluctantly, he parted from the kiss so he could catch his breath. His forehead rested on your own, and his eyes seemed tired, but full of love. There was no more hesitation, no reluctance or indifference in his gaze. Instead, it was replaced with the emotion he was so determined to confess, and it washed over you like summer rain. It felt better than anything ever had, and you never wanted him to look at you any other way ever again.

Silence became the two of you for a few moments, neither of you having the energy to speak. He rested inside of you, completely content with holding you there as he soaked up the last bit of intimacy the moment had to offer. Your brain was abuzz with thoughts, all pertaining to him, and for once, there was nothing negative. Finally, you were at peace, completely comfortable with the man before you. It felt right. You couldn’t deny the fact, and you were over the moon with the outcome of the entire ordeal.

Eventually, he leaned forward, placing one last, gentle kiss to your lips. It was sweet, soft, and exactly what you needed to come back to earth. A small smile was tugging at his lips as he studied your face, and finally, he spoke. The words were quiet, barely noticeable over the sound of your beating heart, but you clung to them as if it were necessary for survival.

“Let me take you out to dinner. Let me do this right.” He whispered, pulling you closer to him. Your bare chest rested against his own, his arms around your waist and as he held you tightly.

“You sure Little Miss Sunshine isn’t too much for you?” You teased, a tired smile crossing your lips as you rested your forehead against his.

“Never too much for me, sweetheart.” He shook his head, looking over the entire picture before him. He had never felt so lucky in his entire life, and he was so grateful that you decided to take a chance on him even after he’d been so rude to you. As he watched your face, he realized he was almost more excited at the prospect of sleeping next to you than he was over having sex with you. “Little Miss Sunshine’s all mine, now.” He said as a matter of fact, turning his head upwards and pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“I can get used to that.” You breathed, unable to express just how happy you were at the sound of his words. After having him in such a way, you would be stupid to let him go.

“I think I can, too.” He smiled against you, soaking up the warmth of loving you openly. You let your eyes close, leaning against him, content with staying in the position for a little while longer. The warmth of his body was alluring, and for a brief moment, you thought you might fall asleep right there in his arms.

You couldn’t believe the night had come to such a climactic end, and you never would have thought you and Jake would end up in a position like such. You were happy, relieved even that all the years of struggling to connect turned out to be a misunderstanding at the very core. You were excited for dinner, you were excited to share a bed with him, wrapped up in his arms all night long, and you were excited to know him. Finally, you could delve into more than superficialities and small talk about the weather, and you could know the boy that always seemed to make your heart beat just a little faster.

Despite all of the new and exciting things, there was still one thing that remained true amidst the chaos, and that was the fact that under no circumstance would you ever let it slip that Sam was right, because both of you knew that you would never live it down.

[jaketsparrow]

SOMETHING... | JTK

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f! Reader

Word Count: 10.6K

Summary: When you have to say goodbye to your professor and mentor, a cocky young professor steps in, Jacob Kiskza. Literature used to be your safe place, but now you feel him getting involved in every corner; it doesn’t help that you’re his TA. You deny yourself every opportunity to fall for him until…

A/N: Hi guys :) I know it’s been forever since I’ve put something together and I apologize about that, but this is life. This one has been on my mind since the Grammy U interview and I finally had the idea to put it all together. I hope you enjoy :) 

Playlist

*Also I'm so sorry I lost my tag list so if you want to be tagged here's a new form* Taglist

MINORS DNI

MENTIONS OF/ TW: Sexual content (of course), talks about death/grief, angst, swearing, Dom! Jake, restraints, possible orgasm denial, choking, alcohol use, fingering (f receiving), dirty talk, ~some~ degrading, praise kink!, I’m sorry if I missed anything, but, etc, it’s filth. 

The classroom was cold in the early months of the year. You had gotten in the habit of wearing your coat through the 3-hour seminar. You were lucky that this class only ran once a week, but you often had to stay longer than the students, working with the professor for a few hours afterward. He was always elusive. Always eager to get things done as fast as possible; efficient and snappy. 

There was much to admire about him, but his personality often left you rolling your eyes. He always seemed a bit too sure about himself, always being the tough grader, pushing students further than they were willing to go. He cared a lot, especially about the subject matter. He still had that gusto in him to do things right, to be stern. 

He was new to the program; and before this, only about a year into teaching. You studied under his predecessor. She was a kinder old woman who cared deeply for you, like your mother away from home. She taught you everything- and even got you to change majors during your sophomore year. She supplemented your reading supplies, nurtured your abilities, and was always willing to sit in deep conversation with you. Discussing the classics, introducing modern pieces, talking about life, talking about it all. 

Professor Kiszka on the other hand… 

When he took over for Professor Meelo, he took very little time to rip the bandaid off. When you had originally been promised a TA position in the literature department, you were expected to be under your mentor, not a cocky white man. 

You spent weeks crying during winter break after first meeting him. The day you met him didn’t go exactly as you hoped. It was the week of finals when you found out Meelo was sick, and that she was stepping away from teaching. As if finals week wasn’t stressful enough, you had to come to terms with the fact that the woman who taught you everything was going to be leaving this world sooner than you would’ve thought. It was even more of a punch in the gut to walk into your introduction meeting to see… him. 

3 Months Ago

The walk across campus felt heavier than usual. The winter had been harsher than it usually was in early December. The wind whipped across your bare rosy cheeks, causing freezing tears to slowly fall out of the corners of your eyes. Almost like a bad omen, the weather continued to get worse as you sludged your way across the quad. 

The parking lot was nearly a mile away from campus, which was nice during the warmer months; the trees would sway across the crosswalk, blessing the sidewalk with fallen flowers and leaves. The grass was green and lively, a welcome mat onto a wonderful learning home. Between the cracks of the stone walkways, little dandelions would grow. You never understood the people who thought them to be unnecessary weeds. They were bright and yellow lively plants, and when the time of beauty passed, they passed their good wishes onto you. Blowing what once were vibrant petals into the wind. Who knew you’d miss the weeds on your walks?

Instead, now the stones were smeared with remnants of snowy footprints, broken earth that had been cracked through with the force of shovels, and the remnants of the dead earth.

Meelo called you just last week. You begged to go see her in the hospital, but she didn’t want you to worry too much. She agreed to call you every other day, just like your usual coffee arrangements. She loved them just as much as you did. She never had a husband or any children. Her students were her children, her soul was fed enough through changing lives that she didn’t want to take away that love from her students or prevent any child from feeling all of it. You were not the first to bear their soul in her office, but you might be one of the last. 

Meelo begged you to go meet the new professor. You had tried to rescind your TA position, but she blocked you at every chance she got. Even while in hospice she still managed to look out for you…

“Please, sweetheart. I know it’s not easy. But he’s young, he’s smart, I think you’ll have a lot in common with him,” She pleaded through the phone. 

“But he’s not you. I just, I thought… I thought I’d have more time…” Your voice trailed off. 

You tried to hold the phone away from your face, trying not to distress her more with the sounds of your whimpers and tears. 

Her voice started again, “You never know what you will learn from him. You have more time with me, but there comes a time when a teacher must share her students for them to learn more. If we stayed in our echo chamber together my dear I’m afraid you wouldn’t learn everything you need to know. Jacob is going to be a great professor, and I know you will learn a lot from him. His research and analysis work is quite extensive. The school and I hired him for a reason. Please. Just give it a try. For me.”

“Just for you.” 

And here you were trudging through, feeling every bone in your body telling you to turn around, to go home. But you were doing this not for you, you reminded yourself. For Meelo. She was right, you latched on to her from your early years in college and favored her over all of your other professors. They were kind and nice as well, but it didn’t matter to you in the end, if they weren’t Meelo, they were never going to compare. 

The building seemed colder than usual. The large glass windows were covered by their shades; no one wanted to see the gross state of life outside of the classroom. That’s hardly motivating to any student, the fluorescents would give more life than the grey state of the weather. 

You pull the door open, walk through the entryway, and follow your usual path down the hallway to Meelo’s room. 

The thing about old colleges, everywhere you turn is a little piece of history. Each room has housed many professors and many students. The building had life, had ghosts of its own hidden in each brick, in each stone. You felt the comfort of this presence moving through the hallway. 

You stop right before Meelo’s room, catching your breath before you enter. Trying to have an open mind. Kiszka could be something, or he could just be another man throwing words at you. Not that all men were the same, but a majority of the male professors here were lackluster, favoring the male students and the athletes who needed the better grades to stay in the school. And if they favored the women… You always felt a cold chill thinking about that. Thinking about why…

One last deep breath before you enter the classroom. You grab tight onto the handle of your tote bag and strut confidently into the room. 

It was empty. 

The beautiful artwork and posters that Meelo had filling the room were stripped. Revealing the natural state of the architecture. It was beautiful in its own way but didn’t feel like the educational home you once felt so blessed to be in. The desks were all shoved to one side of the classroom. The previous welcoming U-shape was demolished, instead providing a cluttered destruction of Meelo’s work. 

You stood awestruck in the shape of the room. There was no time wasted between Meelo leaving and Kiszka starting to make his mark on the room. The bookshelves that used to be filled in the back of the room had been emptied and their contents sat on the floor in boxes.

You walk over to the boxes, kneeling to gently sift through the carelessly placed books. This was Meelo’s library that she had collected for the classroom. Take a book, leave a book, borrow a book, bring it back. You loved visiting this wall every week, seeing what books your peers were interested in, and which books made their way into the library. Some new, and some returning after long months away. 

Sitting on top of the box was the classic “Brave New World”. Aldous Huxley. 1932. Not an original copy, but a new binding. It was like the universe was sending you signs. This would be a brave new world. A world where you might have to come to terms with the fact that Meelo would not be in your life forever.  A world where you might have to figure out everything with a new mentor. A world where you thought you would have years to work on your pieces with a woman who understood you, but now you would turn over your heartfelt pieces to a man. One who may not understand you the same as someone else does.

“A favorite of yours?” A voice perks up from the doorway. 

You turn to see him. Your eyes work your way up his figure. He’s wearing Chelsea boots, black thick linen pants, a white loose shirt with a black vest, and a dress coat over it. His chestnut hair lays over the shoulders of the coat, and his eyes are covered by circular gold-rimmed sunglasses. He oozes mystery. His arms crossed, surveying your crouched body by the boxes. You hate to admit it, but he may be one of the most handsome men you’ve ever seen. 

You hold up the book towards him, displaying the cover. 

“Not particularly. I don’t like thinking about the takeover of technology. It feels too real right now.” You respond. 

He wanders over to you, taking his time, each step creating the most annoying echo in the emptied classroom. He reaches his hand out to yours, asking silently for the book. You hand it over to him and stand to match his level. 

He passes the book between his hands, admiring the binds, “Ah, yes, but perhaps something can be learned from the book if more understood its warning… if only more read it…”

“If only…” You let the conversation trail off. Your eyes wander back to the pile of desks on the opposite wall. You feel yourself zoning out, focused only on the change of the room, not on the man in front of you. 

“-Your favorite?” He asks. 

You snap back to the conversation, trying to recall the beginning of his question, “I’m sorry? 

“If this is not your favorite, can I ask which is?” He waves you to walk with him. 

You follow him into the office at the back of the classroom. He sits in Meelo’s chair, and you sit in the chair that had held you so many times. You wouldn’t be surprised if the cushion had a you-shaped imprint in it at this point. 

He asks a third time, “You don’t seem like the Jane Eyre or Louisa May student, so what is it?” 

You let your bag fall off your shoulder and you try to sit up in the chair, asserting some sort of professionalism. Your answer will hold some sort of judgment for him. Although you want to be offended by his comment about the female author’s classics, he’s right. They were never your favorite. 

“Tess of the D’Urbervilles. Meelo gave it to me as my first assignment.” You respond, confident in your answer. 

He nods in approval, “Lovely choice, very telling. Meelo said you were very bright–one for the classics.” 

He leans back in his chair, stroking his chin. His hand reaches up to the gold-rims and pulls them off, clattering onto the desk. He pulls himself towards the desk, resting his elbows on the table. 

“Are you going to ask me mine?” He asks, almost presumptuously. 

You fight back the urge to roll your eyes. Of course, he has to find a way to be important here. You adjust yourself in your seat, crossing your arms in the process. 

“If you want me to know, why don’t you just say it?” You retort. 

He chuckles to himself, “Lord of the Rings.” 

Your mouth falls so far open that you’re afraid a fly might buzz its way in. You lift your hand to your mouth and try to hide your disapproval.

“That’s a classic for sure.” You reply, “Not one I would’ve expected from a college literature professor, but a classic nonetheless.”

He pushes himself off the desk, running his hands through his long locks before they make their way onto the arms of the seat. 

“You don’t approve?” He scoffs. 

“I didn’t say that, I just said it’s not one that I would expect.” 

“I believe there is a difference between a personal and professional favorite. A favorite you could read over and over again, and you could enjoy without having to think too much about what it all means. it’s an adventure, its heroes and legends, it’s a call for relaxation and enjoyment. I’d rather have my favorite be a well-known classic than a deep thought-provoking story about purity.”

You fight every urge in you to slap the man sitting before you for disgracing such a beautiful novel. But you think about Meelo. You think about stepping outside of the echo chamber. 

“I think we may have different opinions on favorites, Professor Kiszka.” You say shortly. 

You feel the tension grow between you already. This would be a difficult semester. Even more difficult because as you felt your dislike for him grow, you couldn’t stop staring at the beautiful man sitting in front of you. His brown eyes stared deep into you, trying to assess his new assistant. You tried not to let him in too far. You were not fawning for him, at least you weren’t trying to. You wanted to fight off the growing warmth crying to spread through you. It was like seeing a handsome stranger in the bar; you knew the danger, but almost didn’t want to let yourself protect your heart. 

He was by far the youngest professor here, and the most eligible. No ring was on his finger. 

“Please, call me Jacob.” 

You stood up from your seat, throwing your bag over your shoulder. You try to compose yourself enough not to let any distaste escape from your lips. 

“Sorry, Professor Kiszka, I have finals I need to finish, it was a pleasure to meet you. I look forward to working with you in January. If you need anything from me before then, I believe the dean gave you my information.”

You reach your hand out awkwardly, trying to invite a handshake. He cautiously reaches his hand back, pulling you into a firm, but still gentle handshake. 

His eyes meet yours. The deep brown staring into you. Although you should have the power from your standing position, you knew he held all the cards from his seat. The handshake lingered longer than you had expected, both of you locked deep into staring each other down. He finally releases his hand. 

“It was a pleasure.” You start to leave the office, but he makes one last remark, “Oh, one last thing…” 

You turn to face him, “Yes professor?”

 He reaches into the desk and pulls out a cloth-bound book, handing it to you. You slowly return to the desk, taking the book from his hand—the Lord of the Rings. 

“Try it for me? You do have a whole winter break…”

You rub your hands over the cover, smiling at his request. You place the book back in his hand.

“I used to read it as a child. No need to give it a try when you’ve read it four times already.” You smile at him. 

Even if it wasn’t your favorite, didn’t mean it wasn’t a favorite. 

Present

In some ways, your relationship with him felt like a love-lost marriage. Just moving through the motions. You sat in on the classes and took note of who engaged, and who didn’t. You graded assignments, tests, and papers, with him always double-checking and doubting your work. You didn’t sit in on long conversations with him like Meelo. Perhaps some of that was your fault, always quick to get to work. He adjusted to you quickly, understanding how you needed to work, and letting you grieve. 

Meelo passed quickly into the semester. You cried once in front of him when the news broke. You nearly snapped his head off when he asked if he could help you. From that moment on he took on this cold persona, but you don’t blame him at all. You knew in your heart that you would not have the same connection with him as Meelo, so it was easier to never try. 

Through everything, your work never faltered, and your school work remained the priority. Perhaps it was a way to hide through all the pain but the calculated steps it took to grade provided a soothing rhythm amongst the distress. 

You never failed to notice all the times you caught him catching glances at you. You were silly to think that it meant anything more than just a quick look, but still maybe somewhere in your heart, you had hoped that maybe he was thinking of you more than his assistant. For weeks you watched him stroll into class, always wearing a disheveled but somehow put-together outfit. You loved seeing how he would piece together different clothes from his collection. Never repeating an exact outfit, but always finding new ways to repurpose the same items. 

One day he walked in with a new addition to his look, a cluster of pendants on a necklace. They looked older, more worn in than any new silver. You asked him about it briefly, trying not to engage in a further conversation. 

“They’re coins, Spanish coins, designed after ones from the 1600s. I think the jeweler lied to me when he said they were originals, but they still look okay… Do you think so? 

“You look like a pirate.” You responded. 

A sexy pirate. You shoved that thought deep into the back of your mind. Holding on to it, because you didn’t want to forget how good he looked. 

His Thursday classes were always one of the better ones. This was one that you had to take yourself for your graduate program. There was no TA’ing involved as that would be a huge conflict of interest if you got to grade your papers. You chose to sit in the back corner of the class by the window, in hopes that when spring rolls around you could watch the foliage return. The unfortunate thing about this choice was the waiting. February was colder than you had expected and the windows provided no warmth. 

When you were TA’ing you got to sit at the edge of the office and the classroom. Kiszka brought a space heater for you to place at the doorway. He joked he didn’t need his assistant ‘freezing to death’, because then ‘who would grade the papers’.

You tried your hardest to not let him favor you, but you knew he was someone who would be kind no matter how much you asked him to stop. He would leave books on the edge of his desk for you to read and when you tried to return them he declined and told you he already had a copy in his collection. You doubted that and always protested in fear that you thought you might lead him on. But in the end, it was always you walking out with a new book in your bag. 

He was trying his hardest to get along with you. Some days it was easier and you would entertain his questions, but other days it was easier to be quick and move along. This relationship was not going to be a fairytale. You had already found your soulmate once, and you lost her. In your mind, there was no more room in your heart to let someone in. And why should you prepare space for someone if you truly don’t know if they want to be there? 

This class although interesting became boring as the weeks went on. The class had fallen into a seasonal depression of sorts. Many like you had expected to have Meelo for the semester when you had booked your classes, so when Kiszka showed up and tried to shake things up… It wasn’t easy. He was skilled and smart, sure… But not the same. He craved involvement and wanted the class to join in with him, but often would push people further than they were willing to go. A room full of mid-20-year-olds was truly a space of burnout. Many of these students had already passed four, sometimes five years of school before they stepped into this class. They no longer have that lively interest in reading and analyzing literature but want to create their own.

“-And what was this author trying to convey through his use of metaphors?...” He asked from his commanding space at the front of the class, “No one?... No one picked up on this…? Or are you too scared to be wrong?”

Your attempts at fighting off eye-rolls also subsided the longer this course went on, and this roll came on hard. You’ve heard this line countless times through multiple classes. He wasn’t wrong, but he could at least find different ways to say the statement. 

“Y/N? Care to enlighten everyone?” He calls to you, in need of saving the class who had lost attention nearly an hour ago. 

“Sure. It’s a metaphor for how women are treated in society.” You answer.

He grits his teeth and sighs, “Not quite, but you’re close…” 

You lift yourself from your slump, “No, that’s right. She is clearly trying to convey the expectations of women in society and how we are treated. As a female author, she leaves these metaphors to be very simple for female readers to understand. For males, it’s harder to grasp that the severity of these situations could imply the treatment of women, but that’s what she’s trying to explain.”

He clasps his hands together giving them a brief shake, “That class, that is how you analyze. Literature can be read in different ways by different readers. The author may have a clear intention of what they are trying to write, but others may be able to relate it to other aspects of their life. I have my own interpretation, and you all may have others. That is how this should be working. There is nothing wrong, with how you analyze, just that you have the knowledge to back it up…”

Every time you tried to make him out to be the bad guy, he ended up being in the right. You hated how smart he was. You hated how much you wanted to watch him while he stood up there. You hated how he wasn’t her. But you knew you didn’t want him to leave. 

“So with that,” He continues, “Finish up the last few chapters and please come prepared with statements next week about your findings. I want you to dig deep; feel the author. I’ll see you next week.” 

The class starts their shuffle for the door, while you meander to your usual spot at the doorway of the office. The next class wouldn’t be in for 20 minutes, but you would at least have time to warm up. 

You click on the heater and walk over to Kiszka’s rolling desk chair. You take your coat off and rest it over the seat, pushing it over to the door. Kiszka finds his seat at the front of the classroom, pulling out his book of the week. He usually would try to follow you, asking you what you were reading, then the next day showing up to class with an identical copy. It was annoying and endearing how much he wanted to learn from you. You wondered if it upset him that you weren’t as keen on learning from him. 

He confided in you that Meelo was an idol of his as well, and although he didn’t get to learn from her, he was going to try to through you. 

You pull your copy of Anna Karenina from your bag and join him. Your chapters ahead of him, but you enjoy being one step in front of him. 

You peep up from the back of the room, “I didn’t ask, but please tell me this isn’t your first time reading this.” 

He lifts his head from the book slightly, eyes still skimming the page, “Third.” 

You sigh in relief. That would’ve been embarrassing; for him. 

You return to the book. You’re finding it harder to dive in today than usual, something is different… You see out of the corner of your eye that Kiszka has put down the book altogether, and you can sense him staring. This lasts a few moments, but you try to remain focused on the words, but catching yourself having to re-read the paragraphs; not processing the sentences you’ve already read.

A minute goes by and he hasn’t returned to his pages. Instead, you hear the squeak of his chair rolling over to his computer. A few clicks and a frenzy of taps on the keyboard. 

“Hey.” He prods. 

You look up again from the book. He peers at you over the edge of his computer and then closes it so he can see you better. He grasps his jaw lightly, stroking it in his hands. 

“Yes?” You asked, trying not to seem annoyed by the interruption. 

“Let’s go over your manuscript. I want to see it.” He continues. 

No. It’s not time yet. You’ve been meticulously editing it for months now. He wasn’t supposed to read it until midterms, you were supposed to have more time…

You drop the book into your lap, “It’s not ready…” You close the book, “Also we have class in twenty minutes, you won’t be able to read it all by then.” 

He stands up from his seat, straightening his vest out, “I canceled class. Pull it out.” 

Two Hours Later

Some time had passed. You both sat in his office now. Him at… his… desk, and you still positioned by the heater at the door. At this point you were warm enough to finally take your sweater off, stripping down to a simple black t-shirt. You saw him staring through the pages when you pulled the sweater off. If he had looked any harder you think he might burn a hole through the book.

The office was silent except for the occasional click and clack of the heater, and the flickering of the candle on his desk. He flipped through the lightly bound pages while you continued through your reading. Every couple of minutes you could hear the stroke of his red pen hit the pages. The words or corrections will wait for you later. You could sit and scoff at them later in your apartment. The man said his favorite book was Lord of the Rings, how could you possibly trust his editorial judgment?

You had made it about a hundred or so pages through your book, which was slower than you would’ve liked. You still couldn’t breach the interferences. You thought the silence would help, but hearing his hums, his pen strokes, the occasional sip of scotch… It was all a distraction. 

You couldn’t stop looking up from the book to watch him slyly admire your work. You knew your writing was good; Meelo had seen the early stages of it all. She heard the direction and loved every word… A complete sadness rushed over you thinking of how she would never see the final product. 

Kiszka would adjust himself every few minutes; switching positions in his seat. You wanted to trust yourself enough not to look every time he shifted his hips, but those linen pants he loved so much left little to wonder about him. You had a closeness to him that you didn’t want to admit. As many differences as there were between you, there were just as many similarities. He was an outsider here; you could see that clearly. The other professors didn’t trust him because of his age- the students tried to walk all over him because of that too. 

Even though you wanted to hate how pretentious he seemed, deep down you knew it was a facade to seem more studious to others. You saw the real him in glimpses. The kindness he offered to you that many others most likely wouldn’t have. Your youth and love for literature matched his perfectly, although you couldn’t always find the way to express it correctly. Your loyalty to Meelo prevented that at every chance. 

Letting him read this manuscript was a big step that you didn’t fully even realize until he had reached the halfway point. You wanted to go and rip the pages out of his hand, throw them out the window, prevent him from seeing you too deeply… But something inside you needed to know what he thought of it. 

Frustrated by your lack of progress, you lowered the book into your lap. You took this time to look around the room. It had changed so much since you had seen it back in December. Kiszka’s library had taken up the room, along with his record collection. When you would come by early in the morning to drop off the graded work, you would hear him playing some of it. Blues, rock, the classics. You never disturbed him during these times, it felt too intimate to interrupt. Instead, you would place the binder of essays on his classroom desk and scurry away before he could come to say hello. 

You place your bookmark into the page opening. You calmly stand and place the book where you once sat. Quietly, you make your way over to his collection.  

You see him peer up through the pages. Curious about your movements, watching you silently behind the manuscript. 

You lower yourself to the floor, sifting through the jackets of the vinyls. Alphabetical. Of course. You make your way quickly through the a’s and land through the b’s. As cliche as it seems, you truly love Abbey Road, and of course, there it is front and center with the other Beatles albums. You pull it out from the shelf, removing the jacket carefully from the sleeve. You lift the vinyl out and place it on the record player. It’s a modern one, which feels very out of character for Kiszka. He always seemed like the type to randomly have every item of his be nothing newer than 20 years old. 

You press play and lower the needle onto the music. 

Come Together plays softly through the speakers. You turn to look back at him, seeing if there is any protest. Instead, he has the red pen out, slashing across the paper. You grit your teeth and try not to engage. You return to his collection, running your fingers along the remainder of the vinyl. The plastic tickles through your fingers, creating a click, click sound as each jacket releases from your hold. 

Although you did want Kiszka to keep reading, you felt it was necessary to distract him, to try and persuade him to step away…

You continue from the vinyl collection, traipsing through the room. It’s like a library out of a movie, truly. You admired his office deeply and loved to gaze at it while he was lecturing. Sometimes when he was deep in his philosophy of literature speeches, you would lean back in the chair and try to read the book titles from afar. Your eyesight was good, but not good enough to make out the exact names of all of them. You never dared to peruse like this before, but this moment presented the perfect opportunity. 

You were his captive for the remainder of his reading. Well… In all reality, you didn’t have to be here, but you didn’t dare leave that manuscript alone. It had been stored with you in your tote for the past month. You tried to take chunks of edits at a time, working through it yourself when you had time but didn’t want to share it with anyone until you felt that it was complete. 

You tried to fight Kiszka off, but the notion of him canceling class meant that he found taking the time to do this very important… 

The books that were displayed on these shelves were not the type of books that you would find at your local bookstore. They were older, worn in, some of them originals, even some you haven’t read yet. Maybe he did have some things that he could show you…

 You make your way to the last set of bookshelves, rounding the back corner of the office. The last edge of the wall had his makeshift bar. 

The liquor was all dark, amber-colored. Very manly, you thought to yourself. Bottles of whiskey and scotch lined the makeshift bar. Jack Daniels, Sazerac Rye, Macallan Double Cask… You recognized some of the labels. 

Kiszka crept up behind you, “If you wanted a glass, you could’ve asked.” 

He reaches down below you to fetch a rocks glass from the bar. He grabs the Macallan Double Cask and pours a finger for you. The alcohol flows effortlessly out of the bottle, barely splashing into the glass.  He hands the glass to you, your hand brushing his. His touch is warm… Kind. He takes his other hand and grabs your shoulder, in a comforting way. You want to seem completely normal, but feel your cheeks getting rosy from the touch. You suck on your bottom lip and try to hide your face. 

You take a large swig of the scotch, trying to be mindful of not wasting such a good drink. He looks at you, shocked at your ability to take it so easily. 

“Wow. Good.” Is the only words he can mutter. 

You smile meekly. The praise makes you feel undoubtedly shyer than you had just before. 

“Are these originals?” You ask, pointing to the corner section of his library, “I couldn’t tell, and didn’t want to touch them if they were.”

“Many of them, yes,” He responds, “I trust that you would be gentle with them, please, which one were you curious about?” 

You make your way over to the shelf, placing your drink down on the small table near the corner. You reach up to fold out the red bound book. Its title was completely faded from the binding, but we’re curious as to which one it was. He follows closely behind you, close enough to almost be on you. 

He laughs, “Funny you should grab that..” 

You open the cover to find Lord of the Rings printed in big black letters. 

“Oh, dear god.” You sigh. 

“It is an original if that makes you feel any better about it. I know you hate this book, but still-”

“No, no,” You protest, “I never said I hated it, I just said it wasn’t my favorite. Remember we have different opinions on that professor.” 

He scoffs and takes the book from your hand. Rubbing the cloth binding with his thumbs.

“Want to know something funny?” He questions. 

You did. You really did. You wanted the connection at this moment… For whatever cosmic reason it finally felt okay to banter with him. You nod your head, approving him to continue. 

“I saw the movies before I read the books.” He laughs, “My brothers and I loved it, we were practically obsessed, but I was younger then and a stupid boy who didn’t read like I do now. Not the fairytale way most people find their favorite but it reminds me of childhood…”

You wanted to laugh, you wanted to make fun of him for it. But you knew that this was a special moment for him. A look into his past, a presentation for more. He places the book carefully back on the shelf, tucking it back into its spot. 

“Well, I guess that makes more sense now. But, as a graduate professor, you ought to just say you like the pretentious shit. No one’s going to take you seriously.” 

He turns from the shelf, “Who said I was worried about that? If I lie then I am a fraud. I don’t care if anyone says that.” 

Oh fuck. His confidence is so intoxicating. He’s right. Why should he care? 

“I just- I meant… I thought that the other professors-” 

“You thought that they don’t take me seriously? Right. They don’t. In schools like this, you have to earn respect. I’m not an alumnus, I didn’t go to Harvard, but I do a damn good job at what I do. As much as you may protest some of my teaching, I know what I’m doing.”

He breezes past you and strolls back over to the bar to pour himself another drink. You reach back for yours and hold it between your hands, trying to collect yourself. You hope that you didn’t hurt him. 

“Did I offend you?” You ask.

“‘Course not,” He takes a swig, “I just wish you would realize that it doesn’t matter what standards others hold you to. You are not someone else. You are you.” 

“I know that.” You respond dryly. Your answer didn’t sound as confident as you wanted it to be. It came out unsure and desperate. 

“Then why has your whole academic career been based on your relationship with one woman? Why must everything you do be for her?...” 

You stand there silently. Completely struck with emotions. Anger, sadness, discouragement.

“She… She made me who I am,” You pipe, “She’s the reason I am in this program.” 

He strolls back over to you, locking your eyes with his. It’s intimidating, this look he has on his face. He’s studying you, seeing how lost you feel. Truly for the first time you couldn’t even try to put up any walls. He had broken you down. 

He places his hand on your shoulder again, “Can I show you something?” He asks. 

Before you have time to even object to him, his hand moves from your shoulder to your waist, guiding you back towards his desk. You feel butterflies growing inside you. 

No. You can’t. You shouldn’t. He is your advisor. He is not someone you should feel this way about. He’s trying to help you, he’s not interested in you. 

The vinyl finishes its song and moves on to Something. He guides you into his seat. You place the glass down on the desk and wipe the condensation from your hands onto your thighs. He reaches over the desk and twirls the manuscript back in front of you. The pages sit open about two-thirds of the way through. He stands behind you, practically leaning on your back. His chest rests against your shoulder, pointing at the beginning of the page. 

“See this paragraph here?” He questions. 

You strain so hard to not melt at his touch. His hair is grazing your cheek. It smells wonderful, but you can’t admit that. He has this gentle but clean musk about him. He smells like a perfectly cared-for bookstore. A soft smell of tobacco and oak. The chains with pendants are draping over his neck, sparkling in the moonlight of the night, softly clanking together with his movement 

You need to focus. 

You respond, afraid that you waited too long, “Yes?” Your voice wavers, the lack of confidence creeping back through, “Is there something wrong with it?” 

He turns to face you, “Yes. I have a big problem with it.” 

You feel your heart sink. What could be wrong with it? The back half of the book is the best part, it is the part you feel most confident with. You feel confused. All of those walls and confidence you felt once in his presence were lost. 

“What…? What problem?” 

You look back at the pages, disregarding his closeness to you, pulling the bundle of paper back towards you, and flipping through to the previous pages. He puts his hand on yours, stopping you from searching. He lowers himself next to the seat, squatting to be at your eye level. His thumb wanders back and forth over your wrist. 

He smiles a crooked and cunning smile, “It’s some of the best writing I’ve seen in years, and the author was too scared to even share it with anyone. She lost someone and had to do this all on her own. That’s terrifying, but it’s still her work. ” 

You look at the hand holding yours. It’s strong but has a softness to it. It has a few rings sitting on them, but none a wedding band. You lower your head and release your wrist, grabbing it with your other hand. You sigh heavily and grasp your hands in front of the pages. Your hands travel up to hide your face, which presents a melancholic smile that you can’t let go of. You can’t tell if it’s the liquor or his presence, but you feel a glow coming from inside. 

You rush your hands past your face and through your hair, resting your hands on the back of your neck. Scoffing, you turn to look at him. His amused smile is irresistible. 

“You,” He starts, “Are an amazing writer.” His hand lifts from the pages and reaches up towards your cheek, holding your face in his palm, “And no matter who your teacher is, you can still do it on your own.”

Your hand finds its way up to his arm, holding him back. Staring longingly at each other. Both deep down knowing that this was about to lead down a path you couldn’t return from. 

“Professor-” You initiate.

“Jacob.” He replies. 

“Fine… Jacob. This- I… I don’t think.” 

He quickly removes his hand from your face and comes to his senses. “Oh, dear, um… I’m so sorry y/n… I…”

You let yourself slump in the seat. How could you? How could you squander that moment? After years of wishing to find a man who was at least half as interested in literature as you… Here you are throwing it away. But you could be right to do so. He was your professor, you were his assistant, the moral implications of this all… 

Jacob stands and leans back onto the desk, stroking his chin, concerned. Thinking about it all. You can see the nerves climbing through him. He feels embarrassed.

You reach your hand up to your face again, burying your emotions into your skin. 

“I just thought- I, fuck.” He continues, “I thought we were turning a corner, I was looking and I thought I saw you-” 

“You did.” You respond, “...I was looking.”

You lower your hand from your face to stare back at him. You put the manuscript back on the desk and stand. 

“You… You were?” He searches for the answer. 

“Jacob… For months I have looked. I didn’t want to like you. I didn’t want to admit that to myself. My mentor was my heart and soul, she was everything to me. I didn’t want to give you any chances because I didn’t want to lose someone like that again… I can’t handle that heartbreak. But…” You trail off. 

“But?” He inquires. 

You reach for the scotch glass and swirl the liquid around. Staring deep into the stormy amber. 

“Fuck it.” You take the last of the scotch into your mouth and turn back to Jacob, “You… You are what I’ve wanted. I can’t deny the way I feel when it’s just us. When I see you deep in thought, when you push me to go further; when you challenge me. When we’re alone, and I see you for the man you are. When I see how genuinely fucking amazing you are. And I’m so mad at myself for not opening myself to you.” 

Jacob peels himself off the desk and stances himself in front of you. He grabs your hands and holds them tenderly in his. You drop your head, your hair falling over your frustrated expression. 

“You were grieving, you wouldn’t have been ready for this.” He reaches his hand up to tuck your hair behind your ear. 

You look up to him with doe eyes. He was the older man, coming in for the prey. You wanted to be his. You wanted to have him. You wanted it. You denied it for months. You denied it from the moment you saw him. You denied yourself to knowing him in fear that this exact moment would happen. But here you were. Unveiling yourself to him in the very place you felt the first attraction. 

“I want to be ready. No, I am ready. I want this. I can’t deny myself happiness because of everything that happened,” You said. 

“Are you sure?” He asked. Trying to test you. 

You nod your head in approval, trying once again to keep the emotions bottled in. 

“I don’t want you to feel any pressure because-”

“Please don’t say it. I know. I know this is all morally fucked up, but I’m an adult, you’re an adult. Just treat me like one.”

He smiles, admiring your maturity, “If you want to do this, there are some things we have to settle first.” 

You look up at him confused, “Things? What things?” 

“More like rules,” He answers, titling his head playfully, “I need to know what you’re comfortable with. I don’t want to scare you even more than you already seem.” 

He returns his hand to hold your face, just like he previously had only moments before.

“I’m not scared Jacob. What rules?”

“As much as I like to be gentle with women, I also enjoy being rough.” He says through a velvety tone

You jolt back, at first fearful of his words, but relax quickly, reminding yourself you don’t need to be scared. 

“How rough are we talking…” You prod. 

The cunning smile returns across his face, “Don’t worry, I don’t leave marks, at least too bad of marks… And only rough enough that you’ll still be wanting more by the time we’re done.” 

You bite your lip at the thought. You’re no virgin at this point in your life, but you’ve never been able to explore this type of intimacy. Every man in college is practically an amateur at pleasuring women and even more so when it comes to exploration in sex. You’ve read plenty of books to know about the type of sex he was talking about. As much as you enjoyed the classics and the light-hearted romance, you still found yourself picking up a steamier romance book in private. 

You wanted that. Had practically dreamed about it before… 

Being here with this man, who was only a few years your senior, felt like you could practice this fantasy safely. He knew what he was doing, he could show you pleasures you didn’t even know you could enjoy. Even if you felt like you couldn’t learn more from your education with him, perhaps there were other things he could teach you. It was all becoming a bit too exciting. 

His hand moves slowly down from your cheek to your waist. His palms gently grazed your spine until they locked in on your love handles. 

“So,” He continues, “Are you going to be my good girl? Can you be good for me? Do you think you can take it?”

You reach out to his chest, moving aside his shirt which had barely been buttoned. With one swipe down his sternum, you unlatched all of them revealing his smooth golden skin. He watched you intently, seeing you explore his skin like never before. You traced your fingers along the opening, feeling your need to reach more grow. With each second that passed you felt the insatiable thirst to be close to him; to feel him. His grip on your waist tightened with each pass you made over his chest. 

His other hand joined him on your opposite side. You feared that your hips may break with his excited hold. You looked up at him, biting your lip, trying to remain coy. That soft smile appeared on his lips; you had answered with your body language. 

He pushes his hands further into you and lifts you onto the desk, your ass barely resting on the edge of the wood. 

“Words,” He said, pulling himself closer into you, resting perfectly between your legs, “Nothing’s going to happen until you tell me you want it to. This isn’t going to work sweetheart unless you use your words.”

“Jacob-” Are the only breathy words that you can mutter. 

You can feel him growing, feel the linen pants barely holding back his excitement. You feel your heartbeat travel from your chest, down into your stomach, into your… 

His hand moves up to your jaw, holding it firmly in his grip, “Y/N, follow the instructions. Words. I’m not going to wait much longer.” 

“Yes-”

Before you can even finish he’s pulling you into an embrace. Your lips meet his. The soft taste of scotch remaining on both of you created an intoxicating addicting feeling. It was complete passion, complete neediness to be one. His tongue introduces itself into your mouth… Soft, wet. Beckoning. The noises you both are making sound feral, completely unusual for the both of you. What once was a prim and proper relationship between you became a fervent desperation to touch… To fuck. 

His hands traveled down your body, first reaching your chest, grasping you completely in his hand. Rolling his palms over the front of your breasts, driving you completely mad. You wished the barriers of clothing had been completely stripped away, but he was too hungry to even keep you waiting for long. His hands reached under your shirt, plowing underneath the wire of your bra to find your naked breasts. A soft relieving moan escaped your lips through the breaths of the kissing. 

You reached your hands out to find the remainder of the buttons of his vest closing you off to his body. You made quick work of unbuttoning them, reaching your hands across his midsection; climbing to his back. Reaching up towards his shoulders, feeling the softness of his skin across the pads of your fingers. God, he was perfect. 

His fingers traveled to your nipples, running his thumb and forefinger over the bud of your nipples. Before you could even realize what you were doing, your nails dragged down his back, raking into his skin. He paused the kissing for a moment to let out a moaning growl. He slid his hands out from your bra, slipping down to the edges of your shirt, attempting to tug it off as fast as he could. You snatched your hands out of his shirt to raise them over your head, giving him complete access to strip you. 

He placed his hand between your breasts and forced you down onto the desk, your head falling onto the manuscript below you. He shook off his vest and was quick to pull his shirt off. 

“Seems like I’m not the only one who likes it rough, huh?” He asked. 

You lifted your head from the desk, “No, definitely not.” You responded. Unsure where this untamed version of you had even come from. 

“No, sir” He stated, pushing you back down. 

“What?” You asked, skeptical of what he meant.    

He mounted himself once again between your legs, grinding himself into you. He traced his finger down your neck, to the waistline of your pants.

“Sir… That’s what my good girls going to call me, okay?” 

You rolled your eyes, unaware that you were even doing so, “Call me Jacob,” you mock, “Call me sir.”

He reached back up to your jaw, pushing his thumb into your cheek, “If you’re going to be a brat we’re going to need to set some more rules. Good girls don’t get punished, but you’re already testing me.”

Completely stunned, you look back at him trying to emulate a softness, an apology. You had to admit though, you weren’t scared of him… If anything you were more turned on by the thought of his punishments. 

“And how would you punish me, sir?” You ask in your best sultry voice. 

He let out a low grumbling laugh. He studied your body, not even acknowledging your question, just thinking… Thinking of what he would do to you. He grabbed onto your hips and pulled you hard into his cock. There was no wondering anymore. You could feel how large he was, how excited he was. If your own body wasn’t blocking it you could probably see it entirely. 

“Maybe,” He starts, “Maybe you’re not going to be my good girl,” His hands dig deeper into your waist, “Maybe, you’re going to be my little slut.” 

The word echoed through the room. It sent a shiver down your spine, but not the feeling of being displeased, it was a feeling of being right. Being here with him, being under his control, felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off your shoulders. He could see you in a way that someone hasn’t seen you for months. He was learning every inch of you and would learn even more as the night went on. 

He leaned down from his high position to plant gentle kisses along your neck. Gingerly leaving behind little reminders of passion. 

“-And if you’re going to be my slut,” He whines through breathy kisses, “you need to know the safe words.” 

You run your hands up to his hair, feeling the soft strands between your fingers. Tracing his scalp over your fingertips. You don’t want to go this slow, the breaks are killing you. You just want to feel him. You want to feel him on you, in you, taking you completely as his own. 

His kisses finally reach the band of your jeans, but that doesnt stop him from exploring further. He pulls down on the jeans to reveal more of your stomach, delivering gentle almost tickling kisses. 

“Green,” He whispers, “Means you like it… You don’t want me to stop.”

His hand travels over to the button of your jeans, popping the metal away from the denim. Your eyes follow him, watching his hair fall over your stomach, the metal of his necklace chilling your bare skin. His shoulders look strong here, masculine, powerful. Watching him focus so intently on you is killing you. This is a man unlike any other that you’ve been with, he’s focused on treating you first, even if there were some other pleasures in it for him. 

“Yellow,” The zipper slowly starts to unravel as he pulls your pants further down, “Means you need me to slow down… If you need a break…” 

Your pants steadily fall off of your legs, finally being exposed to him entirely until they fall onto the floor. The only thing separating you from him now is your thong. Which you are now praising yourself for wearing today. He resumes his consuming kisses across your midsection, joining back down where he had left off. His hands slip underneath him to grab the edges of the lace, sliding off the thong with ease. 

His kisses start to graze you closer to your… 

He stops and lifts himself. His hand leads up to your mouth, putting his pointer and middle finger into your mouth. You accept them, excited for what it means. 

“Red.” His voice develops a more serious tone, “Means stop.” 

He removes his now slick fingers from your mouth, returning them down below. His fingers reach your cunt, and you welcome him with excitement of your own. Your body is in shambles waiting, wanting to know what it feels like. His fingers dance across your aching clit, his thumb padding the bundle of nerves, sending shockwaves through your deprived body. A loud distressed moan escapes you, you can’t help but express your enthusiasm. 

“Don’t worry sir,” You shudder through achy moans, “I don’t think I’ll need to use that one.”

“Good girl.”

Without any hesitation his fingers breach you, filling you up. He stands over you, watching you grow with the agony of pleasure. Your breath hitches with each pump, your back arching with each lift of his fingers. His thumb traces back over your clit, stimulating every inch of you. 

Every attempt at communicating the feeling faulters, except for, “Oh fuck-” 

Your body is shaking with each movement. He’s painting the perfect picture of an orgasm with just one hand. The power he holds, the knowledge he has. He knew how to please you better than you knew how to. 

His free hand makes its way around your neck, gripping it, holding you in place so he can work harder at you. You’ve never been choked before, it’s a completely new sensation. The gasps for air were something you thought you’d fear, but instead, you were wishing he’d hold on harder. 

“Green?” He asks, looking for permission. 

You nodded your head ferociously  

You feel yourself completely letting go under his control, something you feared once to let him have all the power. But here, now, held down to his desk… You never wanted it to stop. 

“Words.” He barked. 

Your hand reaches up to hold his wrist, “Yes, yes…” 

“Yes, what?” He asks again, his fingers slowing their movement. Clearly, he wouldn’t be letting you get away with anything. You had to be obedient and do as he told you.

“Yes… Please, Sir,” You beg. 

The words were getting harder to communicate. If he could finger you into oblivion, you might let him if it meant you could feel this good again. 

He smiled in approval and resumed his previous pace. Steadily building faster, and faster. Harder and harder. You could feel how wet you were becoming, it really didn’t take much for him to draw the excitement out of you. The swirls of his fingers and the vigor of his motions were precise… Calculated, trying to accomplish only one mission; and he was close to succeeding. 

Your moaning only got more frequent and louder, you couldn’t hold back. The pleasure was far too great to stay quiet. He almost let you be loud too, only for a few moments before reminding you of your location. He lifted his hand off your neck to lift a single finger to his lips and then pointed around the room. 

“If my good girl can’t stay quiet, I’ll have to make her. We don’t want anyone spoiling all the fun.”

You nod your head, remembering you were still in his office. Your surroundings had escaped you completely; only thinking of him and you. 

His thumb started to apply more pressure, practically begging for you for more. A softer moan forced its way out, helpless to be silenced. His hand plasters itself over your mouth, holding you silent. The pads of his fingers resting deep into your cheeks. 

“I know baby, it’s so hard… You’re gonna be so good and come for me now, okay?” 

Finally being relieved of speaking, you nod your head, ready for the climax. His fingers dive upward, grazing the sweet spot buried inside of you. The pressure, the sensation it’s all too much. You feel your belly tighten, your back arching. He’s trying to hold you steady as you writhe in pleasure. There’s no stopping anything now. 

“Do it baby, come on… Be a good little slut for me…”

Your eyes roll deep back into your head. You feel the sweet sensation of release wash over you. Like a wave of ecstasy, traveling from your toes, past your aching clit, through your belly, all the way to your head. Stifled moans slip through the cracks of his fingers. His fingers stay at their steady pace, pushing past your orgasm. You feel yourself dripping around him. You’ve never come this hard in your life, you’ve never felt the devotion to make you feel this good. Your body is quivering around him, unable to shake the overstimulation. You’re squeezing onto his wrist, trying to come down easy, but everything he’s doing is making the sensations crash into you. 

He takes his hand away from your mouth and you immediately gasp for air, trying to find serenity. 

“Oh god,” You moan, “How did you-”

He shuts you up by taking his mouth to your soaked cunt, sliding his tongue through the mess he made. You place your hands beside you to sit up slightly. This was a sight you did not want to miss. You take his hair in your hands and tuck it aside. Each stripe of his tongue makes you wince, you want him to stop, but you can’t let him. It feels too good. It’s too much but just the right amount all at once. 

He was consuming you, desperate to explore every inch of you. Wildly eating you up, trying to capture every last drop of his work. You were spilling into him, it was never-ending.  It was like you weren’t even there; everything except your pusy. This was a high that you never wanted to come down from. He was devoted to keeping you there as long as he could, but you couldn’t hold on for more. 

You fell back onto the desk, squirming through it all. He had you right where he wanted you. You let yourself fall into him, trying to take it all. Your hands reach over the desk, trying to find somewhere to hang onto, but instead knocking the scotch glass off the desk. Shattering loudly beneath you. 

Jacob didn’t stop though, he was completely distracted, locked in. You couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Yellow.. Yellow..” You begged, completely overstimulated and shocked. How could you even ask for that?... But it was impossible to withstand any more sensation. 

He stopped slowly, easing you out of the enjoyment. His hands reached up over your thighs and rested on your hips, slowly petting them with his thumbs. He looked up at you through glazed-over eyes, completely drunk on your arousal. He didn’t want it to end. 

Slowly raising himself back to a standing position, you could see how hard he had gotten. He felt just as much pleasure as you did. He was completely lost, coming back to reality. Chin dripping with your wetness… 

He leaned back over you and kissed you sloppily. The passion was more fiery than before. You did something to him and he did even more to you. It was strange to taste yourself on his lips, but exciting nonetheless. You were caught up together. Complete and one at that moment. And then it all stopped… 

Footsteps approached outside the classroom. You both stopped. He removed himself from your lips and raised his head to listen. 

A knock at the classroom door. 

“Hello?” Someone called out. 

There was no mistaking that someone was in this office, between the music, the glass breaking… They knew. 

“Everything okay in here Kiszka?” 

“Fuck,” he mutters under his breath. He stands and reaches for his shirt, buttoning it with no haste. He grabs your shirt and pants and kicks them under the desk, “Go, get underneath the desk,” He whispers, “Now.”

[sacredthethreadgvf]

Limelight | Jake Kiszka x Reader | Part 1.

Word Count: 13.7k

Prologue

Chapter Warnings: Smoking the herb, Jakes kind of an asshole, kissing and making out. Slight mentions of poor mental health that could be triggering for some. Mentions of self pleasure (f).

A/N: Thank you for being patient with me while I put this story together for you meticulously. I cannot wait to continue to share this story with everyone and I truly hope you all enjoy the slow burn that is only part 1 of our dear series. Buckle up, we have quite the journey together. I have to give the biggest shout out to @joshym, my dear Elisabeth, this story would truly be nothing without your insight. Thank you for your undying support while I navigate this story and for helping me button it up to share with everyone. 

Dear readers, as always, if I have forgotten to add something to my warnings or if there is anything that is triggering, please mention it so I can add such to my warning label. 

Enough of me rambling, I hope you enjoy!

****

July 28th 

STARCATCHER

Houston, TX.

Your alarm blared wildly at 3 am on a Monday morning to your dismay. You had barely slept unfortunately due to the dread of getting on a plane and meeting your new boss in about 13+ hours. Normally, when you are contracted with a new artist there’s a meet and greet between you to see how you would mesh together, to understand what your new boss is looking for in their assistant, what was a big no and what was a necessity. You took this part of your job very seriously. 

When Brian informed you that the boys were already on the road and you could not meet in the safe haven of the office with Brian one seat away from you, your heart sank. 

You were going into this new job knowing nothing about your boss other than what you were able to research on your own.

Jake Kiszka. A young guitarist seemingly at the height of his career with his brothers and his friend.

Your flight to Houston had ultimately gone faster than you wanted it to. Your anxiety grows more and more as you watch the time tick by on your phone screen. You tried your best to distract yourself with music and reading but found that trying to force your brain to not think about something only made it mock you and remind you about it more. Once you landed, you were immediately meeting with the band's current assistant Rose, who was coming to pick you up from the airport with a “runner”. You were going to be thrown to the wolves quite literally tonight. There was a show and you were told to be ready to go to the best of your ability. 

Grabbing your bags off the carousel you walked to the doors in the busy airport, your lungs begging for fresh air after sitting in a stuffy plane for a few hours now. Stepping out you felt the Houston heat invade all your senses and looked to your left to see a short brown hair girl waving you down with a big smile in front of a white van. That must be Rose. 

As you approached closer you got a good look at her features. You could describe her as a cute “mousey” looking girl. Small nose, adorable little smile, and a short bob with bangs which she tried her best to tie up and away from her neck. 

“You must be Y/N!” She said, greeting you with a wider smile. 

“That would be me!” You smiled back at her. 

“Here let me help you with your bags.” You helped her pick up your very full suitcase and lay it in the van. You followed her into it shortly after you got your luggage situated. “Alright Chris, were ready to go!” She said, patting the headrest of the driver's seat. She turned to you and gave you a soft smile. 

“So, Y/N! Tell me about yourself. I already know a bit from what Nick told me about you after connecting with your agency but tell me more!” 

You softly giggled at the energy Rose was giving off. You knew you two would be fast friends. 

“There's not much to tell honestly!” You really hated questions like this. 

“Oh cmon, how did you get into the industry!” She sat a little closer to you as the van made a sharp turn. 

“Let's just say my love for music really attracted me to this career choice. I have zero musical talent but I do love being around it. So I figured I would settle for the fun life of knowing what goes on backstage and working with artists one on one.”

“Ah, you're chasing after the limelight huh?” Rose grinned at you.

“The limelight scares me.” You both laugh. 

After a few beats of silence and a quiet moment of watching the bustling city streets from your window Rose spoke up again. “You'll love the boys. They really are the most genuine down to earth men I have ever had the pleasure of working with. And you'll love Jake,” She winked at you once she had your attention. “He's a looker and a sweetheart.” 

You blushed a bit thinking back to your wine fueled night when you went down a spiral into Greta Van Fleet on the internet. 

“So,” Rose pulled out a little notebook. “Your main focus is Jake tonight, don't let any of the other boys try and con you into helping them out, they're probably going to ask you to do some ridiculous favors just to test you and get under your skin. Especially Joshua.” She rolled her eyes and smirked. 

“I thought you said they were all sweethearts.” You snorted. 

“They are, but they also all have an affinity for trouble. It seems to follow them everywhere.” She giggled. “I'll try to introduce you to Jake when we get to the venue and he can take it from there. I do apologize I cannot show you around much, we are a couple of hours away from the show now and my attention needs to be on Joshua as he can be quite the diva.” 

You raised your eyebrows at her and she rolled her eyes. “Don't ask.”

***

You had a brief moment to drop your bags off at one of the tour buses, which you watched immediately get placed into one of the compartment bins on the side. ‘There goes the promise of a shower and a comfy bed tonight’ You thought to yourself. You were running behind Rose attempting to keep up with her speed walking through the back doors of the venue into the noisy white brick halls, clearly on a mission. 

“Were later than expected,” Rose said, her tone alarming as she glanced at her phone. “Were already past soundcheck, gosh I hope it went okay.” She muttered to herself.

“Here I got you a pass so you don't get thrown out of the venue.” Her tone lightened a bit but you could still see a hint of anxiety in her eyes. “You could easily pass off as one of the boys’ fans and we cant have security throwing out a newbie on day one.” 

You took the little lithograph pass and hung the lanyard from your neck observing its intricate details in the picture. Rose had then given you her phone number and directed you to sit in a dressing room and wait to meet Jake, she apologized profusely that she had to go run off to tend to Josh and you waved her off, understanding that you were the one that was in the way today. 

Sitting on the little loveseat in the room you took your time to observe your surroundings. The typical food and drink set up in an artist's dressing room caught your eye. So he likes wine,  you noted that to yourself for future reference. You noted the neatly placed hairbrush, dyson air wrap, little make up bag. Your eyes finally settled on the silver suit hanging from the back of one of the doors in the room. You pulled your phone out of your little bag and sent a text to your roommate and parents letting them know you at least made it to the venue and you would catch up with them at a later time as you now had to prepare yourself for work mode. 

Your silent moment was interrupted as a tall gentleman who you recognized as the boys’ manager Nick, walked through the door followed by the young guitarist himself. They clearly were in the middle of cracking a joke back and forth as the sound of laughter filled up the once peaceful room. 

“Miss Y/N!” Nick waved towards you with a gesture. “Glad to see you made it here in one piece! Thank you for coming on such short notice, I understand this is moving quite quickly for you. Probably more than you're used to, no?” 

You stood from your spot and extended your hand to shake Nicks. “It's no problem at all. I am a fast learner.” 

“Love to hear that!” He stepped aside briefly and gestured towards the other man occupying the room. “And here is Jake!” 

Jake. Everything you didn't expect and more, although you shouldn't have been surprised. You had only seen photos of Jake on stage when you were doing your “homework”.  As you two got closer to one another, his bergamot cologne overpowered your senses but not in an unpleasant way. He was dressed casually. Almost too casually. A cut off shirt with another button down and jacket laid on top and a pair of way too baggy slacks hanging off of him and a pair of sunglasses hiding his eyes from your view. His hair having a slight wave to it hung from his head.

“Hello Y/N.” He smiled softly at you and extended his hand out for you to shake. You just met the man and yet you already loved the way your name sounded coming from his mouth. 

“Hi.” You heard your own voice squeak in your ears. Why am I like this? You internally rolled your eyes at yourself. 

“Well,” Nick said. “I will leave you both to it. Show time soon Jake. Be ready.” 

Jake nodded and saluted Nick as he walked out the door leaving you both alone. Timidly you watched as Jake waltzed around the dressing room comfortably, grabbing a corkscrew and picking up a bottle of wine from the selection displayed on a table in front of him. 

“You drink?” He asked as he began to pour himself a gracious cup of the red liquid. 

“Uh, yeah I do sometimes.” 

“Would you like a glass?” He reached across the table in front of him to grab another plastic cup and gestured to you. 

You waved him off immediately, “Oh no, no I'm okay thank you.” 

“Cmon, have a bit of wine with me. It's customary when I meet someone to break into a bottle.” His sunglasses still hide his full face from your view.

“Maybe another time,” You sat down on the couch in the room and pulled a notepad out from your back pocket with a pen. “What do you need me to do for you tonight?” 

Jake's eyebrows raised. “Suit yourself I guess.” He approached the vanity opposite where you were sitting and leaned back against it, one ankle crossing over the other. 

“I suppose since we don't have much time I will get myself ready tonight as usual.” You could almost hear the hint of distaste in his mouth.

You watched his Adam's apple bob as he took a big gulp of wine. “I'll just need help with side stage stuff.” His eyebrows furrowed. “Why are you writing that down?” 

While his tone had a hint of curiosity you easily picked up on the scoff that passed his lips. What a prick.. 

“Just want to make sure I dont forget anything important is all. That a problem?” You challenged. 

You watched as his eyebrows rose slightly over his sunglasses. “No.”

“So what is it that you need assistance with at the side stage this evening Mr.Kiszka.” 

He smirked slightly. “Just need to make sure my towels are swapped out every few songs, make sure I have water nearby, and make sure this,” He gestured across the room to the display of wine. “To stay pretty full at all times.” 

“Seems simple enough.” Your pen lifted off of the paper. “Anything else?” 

Jake shook his head no and smirked at you. “Wanna read that list back to me or what?” 

What a douche..

“I'm good thanks. Hey, you good here for a moment? I want to go grab something from my bag on the bus.”

He took another gulp of wine and you watched as his demeanor changed. “All good.”��

You felt like you couldn't get out of that room fast enough, your anxiety taking over. But for what? Why exactly were you feeling like this? Was it the fact that you felt like you couldn't handle the workload given to you? The very minimal workload at that. That couldn't be the case. You had done so much more before this job, juggling multiple members of bands before as a stagehand. Maybe it had something to do with the rather attractive guitarist that you were now working for. 

No no, stop thinking like that you just met him 

He definitely was not what you had expected to be in person. 

***

The countdown for show time came faster than you really wanted it to. You felt like you weren't even close to being prepared for what was ahead of you for the evening. Rose met back up with you again and pulled you along with her to the greenroom where the rest of the band had gathered to say a little prayer before walking to the stage. You picked up on a few things that were said, “May Josh's vocals shine bright, may Jake's guitar never fail, may Danny's drums not break, and let's pray that Sam's bass and mellotron carry us along for a journey.”

“Alright boys!” Rose said rather loudly next to you. “Time for stage!” 

You were not yet prepared for all eyes landing on you at once and for some reason it made you feel rather small all at once. 

“Boys, this is Y/N! Jake's new assistant. Be nice, we want to keep her around.” Rose gestured to you. You watched as chocolate eyes all were focused on you. 

“Hey Y/N!” Everyone but Jake said in unison. 

“This is Josh, Danny and Sam. You will have more time to chit chat and get to know them later on,” Rose said. “For right now, we are cutting it a bit too close for comfort so lets get a move on!” 

Following the boys, security and Rose through the hallway that led to the venue you could hear the screams of anticipation in the background mixed in with the sound of classical music. You could feel a hint of nervousness and tension fill the air as the boys got their cue to enter the stage. This venue was huge, bigger than the ones you were used to seeing. The sound of screams from loyal fans going up an octave once they saw the boys enter the stage which prompted the rest of the venue to follow suit. 

Nothing at all could have mentally prepared you for this moment, nor the events that followed.

***

Everything had gone terribly wrong. 

You had managed to miss every one of Jake's stage cues. To your defense though, you didn't even know what those cues even were or what he had wanted. To further your frustration and embarrassment, you even had a roadie get mad at you and take over grabbing Jake a fresh towel and placing it within reach for Jake. By the time Jake had come off the main stage to go to B Stage in the back of the venue, he was glaring at you. 

“Why don't you just go sit in the dressing room, you're clearly just in the way!” 

You wanted nothing more than to hide away but Rose had come up to you after watching the little incident between you and Jake and encouraged you to stay, just stand stage side on the main stage and let Jake breathe it out. Your heart had been beating wildly in your chest and you couldn't wait for the show to finish to have a moment to yourself.

Rounding the corner your mind felt like it was a mess, buzzing away at a rapid pace with anxious thoughts. Were you made out for this? Smaller bands it was a breeze helping out and working for them, but this felt bigger than you anticipated. Jake seemed to get more and more frustrated with you as the show went on until that moment before the encore. You're praying to the heavens that your face doesn't give away the fact that you were crying, thankful you had packed your mascara into your little purse you had. 

Backstage was buzzing with people. Everyone was currently packing up bins and rolling them to the buses, others shouting orders to one another and pointing in many different directions. The chaos was unnerving compared to earlier before the show. Walking down a long hallway you passed through a few curtains hung up for privacy between the dressing rooms when you heard him. 

“This might have been a mistake.” Jake softly spoke to someone. “She managed to ruin every single thing that I needed tonight.” 

Just let it go, you thought to yourself. It’s not worth getting upset over. He just had a long night.

You just tried to keep yourself busy, helping out in any way you could that didn’t leave you in everyone’s way.

But just as you had decided to pretend as though you were oblivious to his harsh words, it was what he said next that had you throwing that sentiment clear out of the window. 

“I mean, Jesus. You’d have to be some kind of an idiot to not be able to handle something so simple.”

Idiot?

That was most definitely not going to sit comfortably with you. At that point, it wasn’t about “letting it go,” it suddenly became necessary to defend yourself to your new boss who felt the need to say such horrid things about you on your first fucking night.

Your eyes burned with tears of frustration and exhaustion after your long day. You burst through the black curtain and marched up to Jake. 

“First of all, I just fucking got here and had no time to adjust to anything or learn anything about you or what you needed or where to find it.” Your arms crossed in front of your chest. “Second off we don't even know each other and you expect me to know you like the back of your hand? New flash Jake, I dont. So don't just blow me away and throw me to the curb because of one bad night and give me a damn chance.” Your chest was practically heaving by the time you were done speaking. Both Jake and the roadies eyes were wide as saucers staring at you. 

Jake's mouth opened a few times but no words came out. 

“How about instead of undermining me we sit down and actually talk about what you need from me and how I can actually do my job and in a week if I dont ‘have a grasp’ on anything and Im still fucking up? I'll leave you without a word and you won't have to hear from me again. Deal?” 

The roadie Jake was speaking to failed to cover up a laugh with a fake cough and you shot him a glare. He glanced briefly at Jake whose eyes were locked on you with an unreadable expression and then turned away and left you two alone. 

“Y/N, I-” Jake seemed to find his voice just as you started to walk away. 

“Save it.” You shot back at him over your shoulder and muttered under your breath. “Fucking prick.” 

Walking through the same black curtain you had burst through not moments ago you collided with someone who must've been standing close by. “Oh my god Im so sor-”

“That, that was fucking awesome.” Frontman Josh Kiszka himself was grinning wildly at you. 

Your heart leapt out of your throat. “Jesus! Eavesdropping much?” You clenched a hand to your chest. 

Josh laughed and wrapped an arm around your shoulder and began to lead you down the hallway, far away from Jake. “No one other than myself or my other brothers really stand up to Jakey boy. You're really giving him a run for his money. I like you!” He flashed you a wide grin.

“Im s-so sorry,” You stuttered. “That was so unprofessional of me to say-”

“No! It was not unprofessional, dont worry about it.” Josh's arm dropped from your shoulder. “Trust me, he's been such a prick these last few weeks he really needed someone to stick it to him other than his own family.” 

You weren't listening to Josh and you were letting your anxiety get the best of you for the second time tonight. You could not lose another client due to a complication. As much as your boss stuck it out for you, you knew he was also not thrilled with your recent issues with the last band you worked with. 

You broke away from Josh and sat in a rouge chair in one of the hallways and held your head in your hands to shield the tears that were beginning to bubble up again in your throat. 

“Hey, Y/N right? That's your name?” Josh asked, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. You nodded but refused to look up at him until he pulled your hands back from your face. “Give him some time. Like you suggested, just have the sit down with him and figure out what the hell he needs from you. But maybe save it for tomorrow? No offense, but you look like shit.” 

You huffed a laugh and wiped the rouge tear that slipped down your cheek. “Gee, thanks.” 

“Just trying to lighten the mood,” Josh's voice rang like a song and you felt him reach for your hands. “You seem like you've had quite the day my dear. Here, let me show you to the tour bus and your bunk! I'm assuming you will be riding with us since you're going to be hitched to Jake.” 

“Your assumptions are correct, unfortunately.” You gave him a soft smile to which he returned. 

“My twin definitely has quite the temper sometimes, let me tell you.” Josh sucked a breath between his teeth. “But I promise he's nice. Underneath all the mystery he likes to pretend he holds, he's easy going.” 

“You're twins?” You were surprised. 

“I'm five minutes older so I'm superior.” He threw you a wink.

“A superior pain in the ass.” Jake's voice rang out behind the two of you. Your breath caught in your throat again as you took a glance at the man who you had raised your voice at not nearly 15 minutes prior.

He had apparently showered in a short span of time and his hair was dripping onto his soft beige button up he was now sporting. His eyes were hidden by the same pair of sunglasses from earlier and you watched as he slung the backpack he was carrying over his shoulder. 

“Don't you have somewhere else to be?” Josh rolled his eyes. “Come now Y/N, were almost there.” 

“Don't go stealing my assistant now.” Jake shot back at his twin and Josh just shook his head. Clearly there was some twin telepathy that you were missing as you felt the tension between the two rise.

For a moment there was uncomfortable silence held between the three of you and you did not have the heart to speak up. That silence was quickly broken by the sound of diesel engines roaring in the distance and the footsteps of the twins as you walked in between them. Your arms crossed against your chest again, a sign of defensiveness and protection around the strangers you had just met only hours prior. You three walked through a wide entrance into a huge garage lined with at least 8 buses. Chaos was ahead as you watched workers and roadies buzz about getting things packed into different compartments and wheeled to their respective places. 

Jake's pace sped up and he weaseled his way around you and Josh who were now walking side by side. You watched as Jake got on one of the tour buses and disappeared deeper into it without another word to either of you or the workers around. 

Josh sighed next to you and grabbed your hand briefly and you both stopped walking. “Listen, if he gives you a lot of trouble, come find me. Or Sam. Or Danny. We will keep Jake in check. You seem like a really nice girl and already a great addition to the team. Don't let him get under your skin. He will come around.”

“But Josh, you barely know me. I feel like I messed up big tonight and-” 

Josh held a hand up to stop you from talking which you obeyed. “I don't believe that. Give yourself a chance. I can tell you have the vigor and the right attitude to do this job and I expect we will see great things from you. Plus we have all the time in the world to get to know each other” He winked at you and bumped you with his elbow. 

“Thank you Josh.” You smiled softly. 

“Anytime.” He held his arms open for a hug which you graciously accepted. “Now let's get you settled on the bus yeah?” 

***

July 29th. 

Denver, CO.

You awoke to the sound of multiple voices talking back and forth and the sound of shuffling feet and bags. The clear ring of Josh's laugh falling through the tight hallway of the tour bus bunks. You rubbed your eyes and reached for your phone out of the side pocket of the bunk. 

10:44 AM

Your moment of peace in your secluded bunk was disrupted by a small pull on the drapes of your bunk and you shielded your eyes from the bright light coming from the overhead lights. 

“Rise and shine sleepy head,” Rose smiled at you softly. “Duty awaits.” 

Rose was gracious enough to re-close the drapes to your bunk to shield you from the prying eyes of anyone walking past to exit the bus. You quickly gathered your water bottle phone and charger and pulled the curtains back, still feeling groggy and not processing your surroundings. You realized pretty quickly that having a moment to sit in peace and quiet was not an option as you made eye contact with Jake's reflective sunglasses lenses and Danny's smirk, the aisle of people sitting at a stand still similar to the aisle of a plane. 

“Well well, looks like someone got a good night's sleep.” Danny said, smiling at you and gesturing to your head. 

You felt your hair with your hands, a clear rat's nest on one side of your head and then noticed the feeling of drool on the side of your mouth. Your eyes widened, horrified and you pulled the curtain closed again to hide from the men standing eye level right next to you. An absolutely horrifying experience as you heard the two giggle and mutter something along the lines of ‘I remember when I used to crash in bus bunks like that.’ ‘I remember when I had my first real night's sleep.’

You wished at that moment that you could curl up and cease to exist. 

What a way to start a day. 

Voices and the sound of feet got further away in a few moments and you peeked your head out of the curtain and saw the coast was clear enough for you to finally crawl out of your tour bus coffin and seize the day ahead of you. 

After gathering your necessities and locating your bookbag tucked away in a random corner on a couch, you walked off the bus which was located in a back parking lot of a hotel and you were met with Rose once again awaiting your arrival. “Here, I grabbed your suitcase for you. I'm sorry, I should've told you to keep your book bag stocked last night, at least for small items like your hairbrush for the bus. That was my fault.” 

You grimaced as you were trying to work out the knots in your hair with your fingers. “It's no worries, I think I was too tired to properly function anyways yesterday to even consider it.”

“Get used to it kiddo,” She began walking towards the hotel. “You will have to learn how to thrive on no sleep with these hooligans. They will surely give you a run for your money.” 

“Were not all that terrible!” Danny had caught up with you and Rose.

“That might be the best joke I have heard all week!” Rose said.

Danny covered his heart with his hand. “I'm wounded Rose, I'm wounded real deep.”

Rose rolled her eyes and looked back at you as she approached the front doors of the hotel. “I already gathered everyone's room keys and checked the team in, something one day you and I will hopefully switch off on because it can be a lot of work.” You watched Danny grab a hotel key from Rose's hand, you weren't even sure where she pulled it from. 

“You will be rooming with me for most of this tour so we can assist each other with duties. Even though you primarily work with Jake it will be easier for me to help you with things from time to time to make sure we are all on the same page with the band.” 

You nodded at her in agreement and followed her into the hotel elevator. 

“I wanted to apologize for last night. I really did throw you to the wolves and that was my fault. I told Jake to come by our room in about an hour so we can sit down and discuss your duties in further detail so what happened last night doesn't happen again.” She threw you an apologetic look as you grimaced.

“I feel bad about last night.” The elevator dinged announcing your arrival onto your designated floor. 

“Seriously Y/N, don’t. Shit was all whacky and all over the place and you had no clue what to expect. I should've had you shadowing someone, I should've had you shadowing me for the night so you could see how the boys work. I blame myself for this one.”

You arrived at your room and Rose swiped the keycard for entry. The room was modest, two queen beds, tv, little desk and table in the corner and bathroom. The beds white linens looked rather inviting for a nap later on if you had the time to take it. Just as both of you were getting settled into the room, you for a shower and Rose unpacking a few of her personal items you heard her sigh rather loudly. 

You paused what you were doing, “What's up?” 

“Hmm? Oh nothing,” Her head softly shook. “Just Josh needing a multitude of things. I will be back shortly, I must go tend to the king of vocals.” 

You both laughed. “Enjoy your shower!” She said, and with that she was out the door and you were left alone in peace.

Your shower was not living up to your standards with the dang water pressure being practically nothing but the warmth of the water, the smell of your favorite soap, and the normalcy of your shower routine put a satisfied smile on your face. 

Hopping out, you wiped some of the steam that had collected on the mirror and stared at yourself. Thank goodness for showers giving you and your hair a fresh start. That rat's nest had been worse than you expected this morning on the side of your head, understandable why the boys smirked at you.

You heard a soft knock at the door, assuming it was Rose you didn't bother to put on any clothes and just clung the towel closer to your body. Unfortunately for you, when the door swung open you were met with the young guitarist whose eyes seemed to bug out of his head at the sight of you wrapped in a skimpy white towel. 

“Oh my god I am so sorry,” You panicked and pulled the towel tighter around yourself. “I thought you were Rose.” 

Jake cleared his throat and attempted to maintain eye contact with you. “It's, uh, its not a problem.” 

“Uh, come on in, I just need to grab some clothes really quick.” 

You stepped aside to let Jake into your room, heart in your throat out of embarrassment that your new boss has seen you in your current state. You quickly grabbed a tshirt and leggings from your bag while Jake made himself comfortable at a little table that was in the room, pulling out a notebook and setting it in front of himself. You locked yourself back in the bathroom and took a deep breath to ground yourself. 

You made your way out of the bathroom to find Jake now across the room looking out of the window at the view of Denver, Colorado and its bustling streets below. His damn outfit makes your head feel fuzzy. His half unbuttoned shirt half tucked in his pants.

“Hey.” You said softly. 

Jake turned around and you watched as his wandering eyes traveled across your now fully clothed body, briefly meeting yours as his lips curled in the smallest, barely there smirk. “Hello,” he uttered, the corner of his mouth still upturned.

“Listen, I want to apologize for raising my voice at you yesterday. I totally understand if you want to drop me as your assistant, that was highly unprofessional of me .” 

Jake waved you off quickly. “No, it was unprofessional of me to even be talking that way about you. If anything, I’m the one who should be sorry. You were right, I haven't even given you a chance.” He gave you a soft smile, his chestnut eyes glimmering as they peered into yours. “How about we start over. Forget about last night, yeah?” 

“I think I’d be okay with that.” You gave him a soft smile back, finding it hard not to at his contagious charm.

“Great,” he says, offering you a firm hand for a more professional greeting.“Hello I am Jake,” 

“Hi Jake, Im Y/N.” You took his hand in yours, fighting back a giggle as the blush began to rise on your cheeks. The goosebumps instantly began to prickle your skin at the feeling of his touch. You gasped softly at your own body's reaction and tried to cover it up. You were unsure if you were successful or not but Jake did not acknowledge it so you were hopeful. 

“Y/N, it is nice to meet you. I look forward to working together.” He gave you a wide toothy grin now which naturally, you should've guessed, was breathtaking. 

No wait, stop. Don't think like that. This is your boss, your job. Remain professional dammit..

Jake gestured to the table behind you, “Why don't we get started.” 

You nodded and grabbed your own notebook, pen and planner from your bookbag and joined Jake at the little table. 

“I'll go easy on you I swear.” He flashed you another dazzling smile, this time with an added wink and a sweet chuckle under his breath. Why God..why.. 

“Rose might have some more things for you, I know she's excited there will be someone else around to assist but you are first and foremost my assistant so you'll be handling my things primarily and then I may share you with the rest of the crew as needed. You okay with that?” 

You clicked your pen, “Of course!” 

“Fantastic.” He opened up his little notebook which had a little bullet point list written down. You glanced at it and were able to read out most of it but averted your eyes out of respect. You didn't want him to think you were nosey. At least not yet. 

“I know we already talked about most of this last night so it may be repetitive, my apologies for that. I'll keep things pretty simple for you and just reiterate some things,” Jake wiped the corner of his mouth. “Pre shows Im just looking for help with getting ready. Making sure my suits are ready to go, my boots that I need are clean of scuffs. Might need help with make up here and there,” He cleared his throat. “Just some eyeliner nothing fancy like Josh. Maybe some things with my hair but I'm not sure.” 

 “I can definitely help you explore some ideas.” You gave him a soft smile that he returned. 

“Rose usually handles the food and drinks and making sure the venues have everything we need, I'm not sure if she wants to keep it that way or not but we will have to ask her.” 

“Might be easier for her too but yes, we will discuss.” You said. 

Jake turned a page in his little book, “Okay now on stage stuff, I know you also got a brief idea of what that would be for me.” 

You grimaced slightly at the memory of Jakes harsh tone at last nights show telling you to ‘fuck off’ when you were so clearly in his way and not helping. At least now that you're sitting down, hopefully that won't happen again.

“Basically I just need those fresh towels ready, need my drinks to stay topped off like I mentioned, making sure the roadies follow the schedule for which guitar for which song, yada yada. Making sure I have guitar picks ready to go.” He paused to turn the page again and read down the list. “Then I guess just tending to my basic requests throughout the tour. I promise I'm really not that high on maintenance even if it didn't seem that way last night.” He gave you another soft smile. 

“This is all very doable for me. My only request is to keep an open communication with me and work with me, not against me if things go a little haywire while I get used to the flow of your tour.” 

Jake nodded. “Deal.” 

“So I guess Rose is not making this little meeting of ours.” You giggled softly and began packing up your notebook and pen.

“I'm not surprised,” Jake said, mirroring your actions. “Josh can be very demanding of attention you'll learn that pretty quickly.” 

You giggled. “I think I already have.” 

***

August 4th.

STARCATCHER

Seattle, WA. 

“Damn, you really have some dedicated fans.” You said, looking out the van window at the fans lined up on the street along the venue. 

Jake pushed his sunglasses up the bridge of his nose. “We really do, they're awesome.”  

You subconsciously twisted the rings on your fingers in your lap from the feeling of anxiety creeping up in your throat. Jake was the biggest artist that you have worked for so far. Even after your conversation with him the other day where he laid out everything he needed from you in detail once again, you still felt unsure about how tonight would go. 

You felt Jake's hand on your shoulder pulling you back to reality. “You okay over there? You're a million miles away.” 

You glanced over at him and smiled softly, “Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Just a little nervous I guess.” 

“No need to be Y/N, things will go smoothly! I promise not to be an asshole tonight.” You both shared a soft laugh.

Things did not in fact go smoothly…

When you and Jake had initially arrived at the venue you were met with a very frazzled looking Rose and others bustling around. 

“Rose, what the fuck is going on?” Jake had sat her down on the couch in one of the green rooms. Josh on the opposite end of the couch, threw his arm around her for comfort as tears streamed down her face. Across the room Sam and Danny stood unusually quiet and still. 

“One of the runners,” She blew her nose. “Dropped off your stage outfits at the dry cleaners too late and I don't know if we will even have your stage outfits ready to go, let alone everything else adding up. Were missing mic packs somewhere and-and..” She hiccuped. Across the room you saw Danny give Sam a slight nudge with his elbow. 

“Okay deep breaths Rose Bud, remember like we practiced the other day?” Josh said, pulling her closer to him. “We will get this figured out. Don't forget Y/N is here, maybe she can help out a bit.” 

“Yeah, Y/N can help out.” Jake spoke up, volunteering you. “I don't really have much on my list today and I don't need her until later.” 

Rose sniffled and looked up at you. “Would you be able to help?” 

All eyes were on you and the panic you felt in the van crept back up in your throat. “Yeah, uh yes I can see what I can do.” 

Rose jumped up off the couch and gave you a tight hug, “Oh thank the heavens!” 

Shortly after Rose had calmed down a bit, everyone dispersed for the most part. You followed closely behind Sam and Danny as they exited the green room. You picked up on their quiet whispers shared between each other as you turned the corner, your presence apparently going unnoticed. 

“Dude, you gotta go get those mic packs.” Danny whispered, bumping Sam with his elbow like he did in the green room. 

“I know, I know!” Sam responded, squeezing past a few dolly boxes. “I have to go dig them out from my case.” 

“Okay,” You spoke up. “So am I to assume that you two had something to do with the disappearance of those mic packs?” Both of the boys' heads turned quickly in your direction and their eyes grew wide. They had been caught. 

“I do not know what you are talking about Y/N.” Danny gave you a sly grin, turning around to face you. 

You rolled your eyes, “Of course not. You know, you two have some impeccable timing it seems.” 

“Well it's not like we knew everything would go to shit today!” Sam threw his hands up defensively. You couldn't contain your giggle as a smile broke across both of their faces. 

“You two are terrible and you're officially on my radar,” You pushed on both of their shoulders lightly. “Lets go get them. At least then maybe Rose will stop crying.” 

To your luck, the boys had not so sneakily hid the mic packs in plain sight in Sam's wardrobe case and you had them returned to Rose who swore up and down that you were a good luck charm. She had directed you to give them to Dale who was managing sound and tech for the shows. Walking through a little passageway you made your way into the arena where the beeping sounds of heavy machinery seemed to bounce off the ceilings. Techies and roadies alike were bustling around hanging lights, hooking up mechanicals and wires. The stage was being built and even chairs were already being set up on the floor. You had found Dale pretty quickly who seemed relieved to see the mic packs in your hands and thanked you before turning back to a few other workers and continuing directing them on where things will be going.

You took a moment before reentering the winding halls of Denver's Ball Arena to admire how big the venue was from where you stood on the floor. You couldn't begin to imagine playing to an arena packed full of people like this night after night. The empty seats reaching as high as the ceiling made your stomach churn at the thought of sitting up that high. You wondered how many people would pack in tonight to see the boys play their music. You then noticed a small movement out of the corner of your eye as you panned the rest of the arena in awe. 

Was that? No..

Your lips separated with a low gasp. Jake was running. He must've been doing laps around the arena. You stood frozen in your spot watching him closely as he rounded the corner of the venue furthest away from you. His hair was tied back in a low bun against his neck, he had abandoned his usual attire and was sporting a pair of running shorts (something you couldn't picture him wearing) and the skin of his bare torso so clearly glistening in the lighting from the sweat on his body. 

You hadn't realized how hard you had been staring until he rounded the corner and was running towards you. He smirked at you as you locked eyes and your heart leapt in your chest at the realization that you had been caught ogling him. You quickly turned on your heel before he got any closer and booked it down the hall. 

What the hell is wrong with me..snap out of it..

“See something you like?” You heard his voice ring out behind you. Cocky bastard.

You turned around and looked at Jake, it was even worse having him up close to you now. Subconsciously you waited until he caught up to you to continue walking down the hall. 

“Cat got your tongue or something?” He smirked at you as he wiped his sweaty face with a towel. His cologne became ever more powerful as it was radiating off of his hot skin. It was intoxicating. The scents of bergamot and vanilla create a sensual aroma that clouded your mind. Your mouth ran dry and you tried so hard not to steal glances at his sweaty chest. You probably looked like an idiot screaming at yourself mentally to respond to him. 

“What would you like for lunch Jake?” You cleared your throat finally. “Anything specific you like for your post run ritual?” 

“Mmm, a hot shower.”His tone caught you off guard.

Was he doing this on purpose? 

You took a chance and looked his way and you caught what you thought was the tail end of a wink sent towards you. Was he fucking flirting with me? No, no…no way. 

He let out a booming laugh, “I just usually have some sort of chicken wrap. Rose should have it already somewhere if you don't mind grabbing that for me.” He wiped the back of his neck and let his hair down as you two got closer to his designated dressing room. 

“Sure.” 

His fingers grazed your lower back as you cut the corner to the dressing room and your skin felt like it was on fire.

***

The rest of the day ended up running a lot more smoothly than the morning did. Rose was able to get the dry cleaners to expedite the cleaning of the stage outfits and they were back at the venue right as the boys finished their soundcheck and you and Rose hastily worked together to get Josh's jumpsuits laid out for the evening after hanging up suits in other dressing rooms. You had written down a small list in your phone of everything you needed for Jake to have a smooth show tonight. 

Towels by his guitar case. Check. 

One towel on the amp. Check.

Check with Tim to make sure Jakes guitars are all tuned and ready. Check. 

Snacks and drinks in the dressing room. Check. 

Wine bottles in guitar case. Check. 

Water. Big check. 

You felt really prepared for tonight and mentally ready for his cues on stage. Luckily for you, Jake said he had a handle on getting himself ready for tonight and you found him laughing along with something Danny and Sam had apparently said as you walked into the green room for final checks before the walk to the stage. 

“Alright boys!” Rose clapped her hands together. “Everyone has their wireless packs all charged and ready to go?” 

Everyone nodded collectively.

“Let's have a show!” 

***

August 10th

STARCATCHER

Los Angeles, CA.

The morning had gone smoothly thanks to your multiple alarms set to ring every 5 minutes no matter how many times you snoozed them. You were exhausted. Everyone was exhausted actually. The last week of what felt like back to back shows, sleeping in tour bus bunks and arriving at venues, the first thing at the crack of dawn was catching up to everyone. You wanted nothing more than to keep your head buried underneath the soft white linens of the hotel bed sheets with the AC blasting on full, but duty calls and you had to get your adult child to the venue sooner rather than later. Rose of course was up at the crack of dawn and out of the room already tending to the frontman of the band who unfortunately for her, was an early riser regardless of the time he went to bed the night before.

As you did your morning routine and applied some concealer underneath your eyes you were thanking the universe that you were heading home tomorrow. Just one more day, you thought. One more show after this and I can sleep in my own bed and shower in my own home. 

Getting yourself moving in the morning was not bad after you had a few sips of your favorite caffeinated drink, however, getting Jake moving in the morning was another thing. He had a tendency to sleep in until the last moment possible. Not to mention actually getting him ready and out of the hotel room on time was like trying to put a coat on a toddler, near to impossible without some sort of fight. Yet, to your surprise today, he was already up and waiting for you to meet him. He had even called a runner for you two already and was waiting with a breakfast sandwich ready to go. 

“When the hell did you get this?” You asked Jake as you buckled up in the white van. 

“Shortly after I woke up and decided I was hungry.” He smirked. 

You rolled your eyes and decided not to press any further. Thankfully, it seemed as if everything at the venue was in working order. You and Rose caught up on administrative things for the band throughout the day, made sure everyone had their plane tickets booked and ready to go for a quick and easy trip home to Nashville tomorrow. Naturally of course, just because the morning and afternoon had gone smoothly, this meant something had to go haywire before the show. 

Rose had finished Josh and Sams make up for the night. You had been giggling to yourself listening to Josh and Sam. You officially learned what a “Rhinestone Diary” was as the bands social media manager, Kaiya, helped put it together. While the Rhinestone Diary offered a moment of fun for a few, for others, tensions were high after so many shows. Lack of sleep and being cooped up together for a period of time was really taking a toll on everyone's emotions. 

You were typing away on your computer next to the main green room meant for the band to hang out when raised voices pulled you out of your focus. 

“Thats fucking stupid!” 

“Jake,” Josh raised his voice. “You cant just make changes like that last fucking minute because you dont want to play Frozen Light.” 

“Jake,” Rose spoke softly. “We already sent out the setlist to the sounds and light guys.” 

“Okay and?” He snapped. “It's not the first time we've made a last minute change.” Your typing paused and you closed the lid on your laptop. 

“Were not fucking playing Highway Tune!” Josh practically screamed. You had never heard Josh raise his voice that loud. You had heard stories of how bad fights between the Kiszkas could get before but nothing could have prepared you for witnessing it in real time. 

You had abandoned your laptop and you leaned up against the door frame just as Jake seemed to be exiting the room. 

“Fucking selfish prick you know that,” He turned around and looked at Josh. “You know this is just as much my band as it is yours, its called fucking compromise.” 

“It's not much of a compromise when we completely change something that I do not want!” Josh's arms crossed and Jake glared at Josh, you and Rose. 

Greaaat, now I'm caught in the crossfire.  

“What fucking ever.” Jake threw his hands up and brushed past you in the door frame. He began walking down the short hallway towards his dressing room before turning to you. “You coming?” 

Without a word you pushed off the door frame and walked over towards him. Your arms had been crossed against your chest in defense from the rising tensions between the boys. Following Jake closely you watched as he yanked his jacket off and set down on the chair in front of his mirror, he seemed defeated. 

Your arms uncrossed, “Anything I can do for you Jake?” 

“Uh, yeah, I could use some help with my eyeliner pencil,” He let out a breath. “Im shaking so damn bad I can't sharpen the thing.” 

You nodded your head and dug through the little makeup bag that was set aside for Jake specifically and located the little black eyeliner pencil that was more than halfway used. The sound of you sharpening the little pencil was the only noise that you heard in the room as you felt Jake observing you. 

Unfortunately for you, the soft tip of the pencil kept crumbling in the sharpener as you kept twisting it and twisting it. 

“Fuck.” You muttered and felt Jake's eyes glance up at you. “God dammit.” You muttered again as the tip broke for the third time.

“That's the only one I have, stop sharpening it!” Jake snapped at you.

“It's fine Jake we're going home in a day or so, we can get another one.” You kept sharpening the pencil. 

“Youre fucking wasting it!” He snapped at you again. This time, he had snatched the pencil and the sharpener out of your hand. “Just go fucking get my phone charger off the bus Y/N.”

“Huh?”

“Go fucking get my charger from the bus. Its not that fucking hard to follow directions.” 

You instantly recoiled at his raised voice and your head dropped, you felt like you haad fucked up again. When you took a chance to glance at Jake his back was turned to you and your shoulders slumped. You watched as he examined the pencil in his hands and then threw it forcefully into the garbage can across the room.Great, there I go again. It was a usual occurrence for you to blame yourself for others emotions even if you were not consciously aware of it. 

The walk to the tour bus gave you a breath of fresh air at least and allowed you to clear your mind. 

By the time you got back into the arena it was already showtime and the boys had been walked to the stage by security. You plugged Jake's phone in and set it on the vanity in the green room, briefly glancing at his notifications but not trying to pay any real attention to them as you saw a list of texts and a few other notifications. Not my business….

Grabbing a bottle of Cabernet off of a nearby table you began your descent to the stage just as you heard the opening lines of what you quickly learned as The Falling Sky and slowed your stride. You knew Jake was angry but you hated that the anger was directed towards you. He had no right to take his frustrations out on something that you didn't cause and you made a mental note to put him in his place another time. Right now, your focus and your job was on Jake putting on a good show for his fans. 

Walking up to the side of the stage you checked in with Brian, Jakes “right hand” roadie, that all of his guitars were ready along with additional strings and made a note to tell Rose that you needed more nylon strings for Jakes acoustic as he had already broke a few since the last few shows. Standing near the side stage you observed as the crowd went wild for any little movement the boys seemed to make. Josh's voice echoing like siren through the venue echoing off the same walls you had observed in other venues still made your heart stand still 

These boys had talent, talent beyond comprehension, and though you had only known them for a short while you were mesmerized by the craft they created for as young as they were. You found your eyes closely following Jake and while you tried to convince yourself it was because of your job, having to know what he needed at all times, deep down you knew it was because he was the most mesmerizing of them all..

Watching Jake play guitar was like a drug, something you didn't think you needed until it was right in front of you. The raw talent and animalistic way that he played the guitar, the way he made it sing, the way he made it moan and bend to his every need..

Your thoughts were cut short as Rose came up beside you and signaled to the break in the setlist in front of you. Almost simultaneously Jake looked back side stage and signaled to his amp where his cup of wine lay hidden. That was your cue. Staying out of sight you twisted the cap and graciously poured his cup half full. He gave you a half smile and a small thumbs up as a thanks but you returned his gesture with a frown because fuck his attitude earlier. Even if he was feeling better from the energy from the fans in the room doesn't mean that you had forgotten how he had snapped at you. 

You made your way back down the stairs side stage and stood by with your arms crossed thinking about how much you wanted this show to end so you could go lay in your hotel room bed and forget about today. You took a deep breath as you heard Jake's guitar wail again, You'll be in your own bed in a few days time, you'll be in the quiet of your apartment, just keep hanging on Y/N..

You watched in horror as Jake approached you, his red gibson swinging on his hips. He stepped down the back stairs with confidence and handed you the white rose he was carrying, “I'm sorry I was a dick to you tonight.” 

Oh. 

You stood frozen holding the long stem with the white flower delicately on top as Jake gave you a small smile and walked back up the stairs. This was definitely something you were not expecting. 

***

August 20th

HOME SWEET HOME…

Nashville, TN. 

It had been a little while since the day Jake presented you with his apology. You had accepted the rose willingly when he handed it to you, but you felt in utter shock over it. That evening after the show Jake had sat you down and told you he was really going to work on his attitude towards you, that it was unfair you were taking the brunt of it when his anger had been all towards his brothers. You had parted ways on good terms after coming home to Nashville and you were enjoying your quiet time away from the limelight, and the chaos. You had just sat down on your couch and cozied up for the night when your phone screen lit up next to you unexpectedly.

Jake Kiszka

Hey, you busy tomorrow? 

Oh. This is unexpected. 

You were snuggled up with a glass of your favorite beverage in hand and your roommate's cat, Beans, purring against your leg as you pet him softly. You had the tv on in the background but you were curled up with your favorite book at the moment, rereading it for the fourth time. Seeing Jake's name across your screen caused your heart to jump in your chest. You haven't heard from him in a few weeks, since the day you parted in the airport to head home when your roommate Addison came to pick you up. 

You 

Nothing planned, what's going on? 

You laid your head against the couch pillow and felt as Beans stretched his paws against you, you smiled in content at the small animal. Your phone vibrated again. 

Jake Kiszka 

I could use your help cleaning out and re packing my cases for tour in a few weeks. We always make it into a party too with food and drinks and music too so I promise I won't work you too hard :) 

You caught yourself smiling a bit. Even though this was going to be work related, the thought of seeing Jake again made your stomach fill with butterflies. Fuck no, stop smiling like that..this isnt right this is your boss for crying out loud…

Yet, you couldn't deny it anymore. You were so clearly lying to yourself.

You were crushing on Jake Kiszka whether you wanted to or not. You couldn't deny how your heart felt at the thought of him and to your demise, you couldn't help but think about him constantly since you ended the first part of the tour. Especially, it seems, at certain moments late at night when your vibrator had fully charged.

Okay, whatever, you were “down bad” according to Addison. You felt ashamed for feeling this way towards your boss but as long as you kept yourself professional around Jake what was the harm in a little crush..right?

****

August 21st

GVF, LLC OFFICE.

Nashville, TN.

You swore you didn't pick out this outfit because you were seeing Jake today. No definitely not the flowy powder blue sundress that was hanging in your closet begging to be worn. You had simply forgotten about it being in there and today was so hot, it was perfect weather for a dress, yeah. 

You swiped on a little bit of your favorite lip gloss and fluffed your hair when you caught eyes with your roommate in the reflection of the mirror and yelped. “What the hell is a matter with your Addison?! Don't you know how to knock?” You clenched your heart over your heaving chest trying your best to calm your erratic heart. 

Addison wore a proud smirk as she leaned against the door frame, steaming cup of coffee in hand. “Who are you getting all dolled up for? Is it your sweet Jaaake?” 

“Mind your business” You turned towards your reflection one more time. One last look to make sure everything was in place. “Don't you have something to do today? Somewhere to be?” 

Addison was barricading you in the bathroom. “Nope. Cmon, just admit that you have a crush on him already and I'll leave you be!” 

You pushed past her not wanting to acknowledge the feelings growing in your heart and naturally, she followed you as you walked into your room to grab your purse to head out the door. “Keep denying it to yourself and it'll get worse.” 

“Yeah well, there's nothing there to begin with, so I don't know what to tell you.” You slipped your favorite comfy shoes on near the front door of the apartment. 

“Mhm, suuure.” 

At that, you walked out of the door with a dramatic eye roll. 

***

The Kiszkas sure knew how to throw a party it seemed. 

What had started off as an innocent afternoon unpacking and repacking crates and boxes while listening to music, quickly turned into what Jake deemed “a shit fest” as soon as Sam had located a bottle of tequila hidden in one of his crates. 

“Woah!” He had announced to the room, waving the bottle around like a prize. “Lookie what I have here. Who wants shots?!” 

Rose stopped packing the box of Tide To-Go sticks in Josh's case. “Sam, were not even finished yet!” 

“Why should that stop us? We just struck gold!” 

You and Jake made eye contact as you were standing near his dolly box and you both smirked at one another. “Let's go Sammy boy!” He turned and yelled across the room. 

“Yes! Jakes in! Now who else?” 

One shot turned into, well, several in a short matter of time. You realize the energy had shifted from work to party mode once the music in the room had picked up in volume. To Rose's dismay, the tasks at hand had been long abandoned and swapped in for everyone mingling with each other. The glow of the afternoon sun had settled into darker hues of pink and orange as the sun began to set on the city of Nashville and you had a nice little buzz flowing through your veins. You felt yourself actually relax and let loose and have fun for once, without worrying about being too professional. You were growing quite comfortable around here. Around your little tour family.

You had been perched up against the pool table across the room watching the shenanigans of Jake and Sam fighting each other with plastic swords dramatically. Josh had taken it upon himself to be the ref and Jake had been on and off yelling about how Josh was terrible at his job. You smiled in content as you watched others scattered around the room, watching the childish display or talking amongst themselves. 

“What are you smirking at?” Danny approached you. 

“Oh, nothing, just uh, feeling happy for the first time in a little while. Grateful I'm here.” 

“We're very grateful to have you. Jakes is very grateful, I know.” Danny shot you a small wink over the rim of his cup. Oh?

You were in the middle of talking with Danny about one of your favorite albums to listen to on your self dictated “Vinyl Sundays'  in your apartment when you felt a nudge on your shoulder and heard a soft ‘hey’ in your ear. You turned around and were met with Jake, sunglasses on now of course even though the sun had just fully set and a playful smirk resting on his face. A hint of a British accent grazed past his lips when he spoke. “Cmere, wanna show you something.” 

Your heart skipped a beat, did you mess something up? No, you couldn't have, not with his body language. You smiled softly at Danny. “Excuse me, it seems my attention is needed elsewhere.” 

“Not a problem Y/N, it's been nice getting to know you. You'll have to bring me that vinyl so I can listen to it before the tour starts up again.” He smiled softly back at you. 

“I will make sure that I do!” 

You followed Jake through the hallways of their management office, both of you silent for a beat before Jake threw a smile over his shoulder at you. 

“What were you and Danny talking about?” 

“He was asking me about my vinyl collection actually.” You said proudly.

“Vinyl collection huh? Anything good?” He tipped his sunglasses down to throw you a quizzical look. 

“Quite a bit actually,” You nodded. “Between my parents collection and my own I would say I have a couple hundred lying around. I try to listen to a new album every Sunday even if it's an album I know or have listened to on a streaming service.” 

“Couple hundred?” You couldn't see it now that Jake's sunglasses found their rightful place once more on his nose, but his eyes practically bugged out of his head. You had caught him off guard and you didn't even know it.  “Thats, that's quite impressive actually.” 

You sighed, “I take pride in my collection but I really owe it to both of my parents, mostly my father, for having quite the exquisite rock and roll and folk collection.” 

Jake hummed and flashed you a gut wrenching smile. “I might have to come and listen with you sometime.” 

“I'd like that Jake.” 

“Which one were you talking to Danny about?” You turned yet another corner in what seemed to be a maze of hallways. 

“Oh, I was just going through another box in my parents basement the other day and found quite the gem. Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, I Love Rock ‘N’ Roll. One of my favorite songs is on there, Crimson and Clover.” 

Jake smiled to himself, “Crimson and Clover, hmm.”

“What..” You were fully ready to defend yourself. 

“Oh nothing, seems fitting. Seems very you, you remind me of a little clover. A little good luck clover. You've made my life so much easier on tour lately; it's like you're my little good luck charm. My little Clover.” Jake's fingers played with the stubble on his chin and you felt your cheeks grow warm with blood. “Ahh, and there's the Crimson to go along with it.” 

You couldn't hide the smile any longer. The tension was so thick you felt as though you could cut through it with a dull knife. 

“Jake?” You asked softly.

He turned towards you, eyes still hiding behind his RayBans. “Yeah?” 

“Where are you taking me?” You couldn't help the infectious smile that broke across your face yet again. He was simply electric. 

Jake stopped walking and you followed suit. “Ah fuck, Im sorry, I probably should’ve asked this before I pulled you away but do you smoke?” 

“What?” You weren't sure you heard him correctly.

“You know.” He pinched his pointer finger to his thumb and raised it to his lips, eyebrows lifting simultaneously in question. 

“Oh,” Your arms crossed against your chest. “Yeah uh, sometimes. Not often though.” 

“Hmm,” He hummed and reached into the front pocket of his button down shirt. “Well, there's this secret room here that I like to hide away in sometimes and take the edge off after a meeting with the hooligans. Figured I could show you and we could, you know.” He trailed off and his head tipped down towards the ground. 

“I'm down I think,” You smiled. “It's been awhile since I smoked though so I might not smoke all that much.” 

Jake grinned at you, “Fantastic. No worries, we don't have to smoke it all. Cmon were not far.” 

You followed Jake down yet another hallway towards a solid door with a bright exit sign hanging overhead. As he pushed through the door the August humidity engulfed you for a moment but it was short lived as Jake opened another side door from the outside of the white brick building and gestured to you to enter. You were surprised as you stepped into what looked like a, possibly still used, darkroom. Red lights were shining through the room, you could see bins on tables and clotheslines hung up along the walls. At the present moment though, no photos were hung up to dry.

“Woah.” You whispered as you heard Jake close the door behind you. “Is this?”

“A darkroom? Yeah,” He smiled at you softly, his sunglasses finally coming off of his face. “We like to come here and develop the film that we capture. Well, mostly Sam and Josh but I dabble with it sometimes as well.”

“This is really cool.” You said as you walked further into the room. “Kind of disappointed that there's no film developing right now, honestly.” 

You heard the click of a lighter behind you and the sound of Jake inhaling. “Yeah, we wouldn't be able to do this though if there was.” He blew the smoke out of his mouth and you watched it engulf his face for a moment in the red light. 

Damn these red lights, you thought. Jake somehow looked even sexier than he normally did in the low red lights. He looked like he was damned to steal your soul from you, like he was put on this earth to bewitch you into falling in love with him. He smirked as he blew out another big hit. “Are you just going to keep staring at me or would you like to take a hit of this?” 

Your eyes widened with fear and you felt your face flush hot. Okay, thank god for these red lights actually… 

You reached out to take the blunt from Jake and pulled it to your lips. You took in a generous hit, not aware of how much you had actually inhaled. But your lungs made sure to point that out to you pretty quickly though as a coughing fit began to wrack through your body. 

“Woah Y/N, take a breath if you can.” Jake came up beside you and began rubbing your back, pulling the blunt from your fingers and holding it away from your body. Thankfully, you had carried a small water bottle with you and you were able to stop coughing enough to finally take a few deep breaths. You felt the instant head buzz from the high settling into your body. It wasn't alarming or anxiety inducing, you felt calm. Like your worries had no longer room in your mind. 

“There we go.” Jake said softly, his strong hand still rubbing comforting circles along your back that definitely awoke a different type of feeling low in your stomach. “Ready for another?” 

“Hell no.” You choked out a laugh and his throaty laugh followed suit. His laugh was music to your ears. How could it be possible that a damn laugh could sound sexy?

“Fair enough Y/N.” 

You watched as he lifted the blunt to his soft looking lips that were glistening even in the red light. His eyes flicked to you again as the smoke began to leave his lungs and float through the air. Your eyes snapped to the ground out of embarrassment for being caught staring at him yet again. You hated how his lips tilted up in a little smirk as he realized, as well, that he had caught you again.

Clearing your throat you broke the silence, and the tension “What kind of film do you all usually produce here?” 

Another cloud of smoke engulfed the space around you, the red lights showing that the room had a slight haze to it now. “Mostly pictures from the tour. I know Sammy boy is more into this than anything, surprisingly. He constantly carries his camera around with him.” 

You hummed and pretended like the clotheslines with hooks were suddenly the most interesting thing in the room rather than the man who was dripping with sex appeal next to you. 

“Want one last hit before it's done?” Jake asked, gesturing to the now very small blunt. 

“Uh, I'm probably okay, I'd like to avoid another cough attack if possible.” You giggled softly as you waved him off.  

“Hm,” His lips pressed into a tight line for a moment. “You ever shotgun before?” 

“What?” Your eyes widened. 

“You ever did a shotgun with someone while smoking?” He tilted his head at you. 

“I uh, don't think so no.” You fidgeted with your fingers as nervousness crept up in your throat. 

You watched as he moved a little closer to you, closing the space and making your throat constrict. “‘S pretty easy, I take a hit and then blow it in your mouth. It makes it so the smoke isn't as harsh.” 

The spicy bergamot of his cologne rolling off of his skin began engulfing your senses and coaxing you into yet another intoxicating cloud of lust that was Jake. Now, of course, this sense was heightened with your current state of mind. 

“Wanna try?” He whispered as he moved even closer to you again. You watched as he stepped in front of you so you two were facing each other head on now.

You slowly nodded your head in fear that your voice would fail you if you tried to speak. You bit your lip in anticipation of what was going to happen next. Jake sucked in a soft breath between his lips and brought his hand up to your chin.

 “Don't do that,” He whispered. “Drives me crazy when you do.”

Your lips parted slightly as his calloused thumb swiped along your mouth, that very thumb catching the fullness of your bottom lip for just a moment as you released it from your teeth before he pulled away. 

Your mouth was undeniably dry as he smiled down at you and you felt the buttons of his shirt graze softly against your skin. The heat coming off of his body was noticeable and by God did you suddenly wish he would just press himself fully against you. 

“Okay, s’easy. Trust me yeah?” He brushed your hair away from one side of your face and your heart leapt out of your chest. You didn't have time to fully comprehend what was happening as you watched him bring the blunt to those perfectly soft looking lips and inhale a deep cloud of smoke. What happened next was simultaneously going too slow and too fast all at once. Your brain struggled to keep up with what was happening as his fingertips dipped into your hair and pulled you closer to him by the back of your neck. Holy shit.  

You finally felt Jake's body meld with yours as best it could, the feeling of being pressed between the man you desired most and a shitty little table was instantly the most intoxicating feeling you had experienced in a long time. You didn't feel like you could have prepared yourself for the set of events that unfolded shortly after. 

You felt that same thumb from earlier brush softly at the bottom of your ear as he tipped your head up towards him slightly. You wanted to close your eyes but your couldn't bring yourself to find the strength to do so. You watched as he leaned in and gasped softly as you felt his lip softly against yours. Your heart sank to your stomach at the feeling of finally being close to him in ways you only had wished for the last few weeks. You suddenly remembered what got you into this position in the first place as you felt Jakes nose nudge softly against yours. Your mouth parted slightly to accept the smoke tucked away in his lungs currently.At your acknowledgement that you were ready to accept what he was giving to you, you felt Jakes lips press a little harder against yours and you felt the hot smoke flood your mouth. You inhaled as best as you could but you also were frozen in place.

Instead of pulling away immediately as you exhaled the smoke from your own lungs, Jake took a chance and softly closed his lips against yours to which you softly reciprocated as well. This kiss was cautionary and you confirmed how both of you felt in the moment as Jake pulled slightly away, hand still tucked in your hair. You couldn't read his facial expression all too well but his eyes had a determined look. 

You made the first move to fully kiss him at this point. You tipped your head up and pressed a more determined kiss to his lips. Jake welcomed the kiss. His lips engulfing your own in a soft, pillowy dream of lust. You felt goosebumps spread across your body as you melted further into him, wrapping your arms around the back of his head and you pulled him impossibly closer to you. As your mouths moved back and forth a little less cautiously at this point you made a mental note for yourself how Jake's bottom lip was most prominent in the kiss. His mouth was warm, and so soft but rough against your own as the sexual tension built up in the room. You felt his hands rubbing down the sides of your body and settling on your hips giving them a soft squeeze as you two deepened the kiss further and your tongues touched for the first time. 

Inhibitions clearly out the window, you felt him lift you up onto the table behind you without breaking the heated make out that was now happening. As his tongue dipped further against yours, you couldn't help but moan softly. He seemed to appreciate your reaction as he squeezed your hips tighter and dragged you closer to the edge of the table, your clothed core making slight contact with the buckle of his belt. Nothing mattered anymore. Nothing mattered other than Jake and how he felt. Your fingers found their way into his soft hair and you pulled slightly releasing a moan he had been hiding away from you. It didn't feel like enough. More. You needed more….

The shrill sound of an iPhone ringtone broke through the silence in the room making you both jump. 

“Dammit Josh,” Jake swore as he looked at the screen of his phone and lifted it up to his ear. “What!” His body was still pressed up against yours and his fingertips were dragging along the exposed skin on your hip. From this position you were in, he looked fucked out and by God he looked delicious. 

“I just ran out to my car to grab something dude,” Jake spoke angrily into his phone and rolled his eyes. “No im not in the fuckin, whatever man. Im coming back now anyways chill the fuck out.” 

You heard the three beeps of a call ending and Jake sighed and glanced at you, “Sorry Clover” 

His fingers grazed across your cheekbone. “Here, let me help you down.” 

You felt his hands squeeze your hips again and you felt like you were out of breath. The weight of what happened between you and Jake now settling slowly into your consciousness. Before you could think much further, his fingertips tipped your chin up and he softly pressed his lips to yours one more time. As he pulled away he smiled softly at you and you couldn't help but reciprocate. 

He was like a drug, and now that you've had a taste, you weren't sure you were going to be able to give it up. You pressed your fingertips softly to your tingling lips to hide your smile as Jake walked his way out the door, turning around to blow a kiss to you and wave his fingers. His sunglasses take their natural place sitting on his perfect nose once again. You followed shortly thereafter and giggled as you watched the remnants of the smoke pour out the door. 

“Cmon darlin,” Jake wrapped an arm around your shoulder. “Let's go have ourselves a party, yeah?”

You smiled and wrapped an arm around Jake's torso, “Lets!” You'll deal with whatever just happened tomorrow. Yeah, tomorrow is good.

Remember that harmless little crush you thought wouldn't get in the way of anything?

Yeah, well you might've been wrong but you definitely won't be telling anyone about it.

****

.

.

.

.

.

taglist: @brujamagik @anythingforjtk @jakesguitarsolo @do-it-jakey-baby @vanfleeter @violetstarcatcher @myownparadise96@ignite-my-fire @nina-23-45

A/N: If you would like to be added to the taglist let me know :)

[devilat-thedoor]

A/N: Lovers, babes, friends🩵 this is an open love letter to anyone who has kept up with my little baby of a fic. If you’ve stuck around this long, i’d just like to offer my love and appreciation for you. The amount of support and love that i’ve received through the journey thus far has been incredible and truly inspiring and heartwarming. I know it’s been a roller coaster of emotions, but the ride isn’t over just yet……There may be a loop or two ahead? I love you all endlessly💜

In Progress | 18+ Minors DNI | Includes smut&other mature themes

Word Count: 104.5k

Jake Kiszka x f!reader

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4 (TW:SA)

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10

Part 11 (coming soon)

[wildbluesorbit]

Wounded III || JTK

18+mdni

paring: jakexreader(f)

LONDON SERIES MASTERPOST

A/N: alrighty, here’s the final piece. All your words have made my first fic/series so fun and I can’t wait to give yall more:)) pretty please let me know what you think <3

Summary || You promised Jake an evening out, but you’re not certain if you can make through the night.

Content Warnings || swearing, alcoholic consumption, anger, verbal aggression, adult themes, agoraphobia, haphepobia, graphic sexual depictions

Word Count || 9.5k+

The light knock at your door sends you into a frantic spell before anyone can announce themselves and their business that miserably requires access to you and your sanctuary.

You had been doing your best to go about your routine the past few days and not dwell on the daunting date you assured Jake. You had always given him your ifs and maybes when it came to going out, but this pledged appearance was taxing your every thought.

Routine. Keep your head in routine. Just keep moving. One day at a time and all that compartmentalizing bullshit your therapists always vomit at you yet never proves useful.

The truth being no matter how you avert your attention, the dreaded moment would still come to pass. And alas, it does; arriving in the form of Jake poking his head through the door. You invite the rest of his body to join your room.

With an easy energy, Jake percolates through the doorway dressed in his signature all black deep-v button up and pleated trousers. Paired with his signature chain of doubloons and black loafers. You always find the consistency of his formulaic ensembles to be a comfort.

In the true spirit of procrastination and denial you hadn’t even conceptualized an outfit yet.

Jake instinctively gravitates towards the guitar in the corner of your room and begins to fidget with the strings, busying himself from your bed as he watches you get ready. You think maybe he fears you are going to talk yourself out of the evening or it might not come to pass if he doesn’t witness it with his own eyes.

You frantically scatter for the first outfit you can make out, dressing in a relaxed cream button blouse with mom jeans and platform oxfords. You paint your features with natural make up and throw your curls in two messy braids and lightly accessorize. You emerge back from your bathroom expecting to make out a bored Jake. Instead, you’re greeted by an empty bedroom.

You are sure you hadn’t taken too long to get ready. You simply shrug and stomp to the full body mirror. You appear just fine, yet you definitely do not feel it.

You run your sweaty hands down your jeans as Jake reappears through the door. In his hands, he clutches his navy corduroy jacket he went to retrieve. You are clueless as to what you have done in your life to deserve this man that always anticipates your next need before you do.

Jake streams across the floor towards you and unfolds the coat, lifting it in the air for you to slip your arm through. You face away from the doting man and extend your hand out as he attentively dresses you in his jacket one shoulder at a time, savoring the moment. His aroma emits from the material as you take a deep breath and tug the sleeves over your fingertips.

Glancing back in the mirror you already feel a bit better; that’s what your outfit had been missing.

You return your eyes to Jake, slinking your hands deep into the pockets of the coat as he tugs on the lapel, properly adjusting it over your shoulders; unaware of your shaking till he steadies you with the weight of his hands.

His digits travel to faintly twist the tail of one of your braids between the pads of his fingers as a smile breaks loose at the sight of you.

“You are truly a vision,” Jake’s honey eyes swivel as he indulges in every detail he can canvass, his words adorn you better than any accessory ever could, “Ready?”

You force a weak nod and dreadfully follow his giddy lead from out your bedroom, down the stairs, and towards the front door.

Of course, you freeze where you always do but this time Jake just smiles and swings the entryway wide open, sauntering out to wait for you on the other side of the threshold.

“You’re ready, I can see it,” his lips curl as he beckons you with his giant smile.

You raise an eyebrow at him from the safety of the inside, “How do you know?”

“Because in just these past few days, it's not hard to see you’re outgrowing your fears and soon you’ll become cramped with them in this house,” he offers his palm out to you.

You slip your hand into his and squeeze, clench your eyes shut, and take a deep inhale as you step from the elevated doorstep down to the porch.

You playfully puff your cheeks out to hold your breath and squint open one eye to examine your surroundings.

Jake chuckles, tugging you toward his car, “Oh? So you got jokes now?”

You anticipate the same relapse as the last time you stepped foot out your door. Everything appears the same. The autumn breeze waltzes around you the same. The birds chirp the same. The world is the same shade of fall. The same sun warms you. Yet everything that terrified you about your last excursion seems to spell you ambitious to walk further with Jake now. Maybe Jake is right and he can see something you can’t. Maybe you are ready.

You achieve the top of the driveway as Jake pilots the path to open your door and you load into the vehicle. Like a familiar episode of Deja Vu, you had almost forgotten what Jake’s car looked like: the black interior, the smell of him mixed with car leather, and of course a tricked out stereo. The sight brings you to a nostalgic giggle as you are reminded of an indecent moment or two with Jake in this very car.

The door shuts with a slam and just like that, you are alone with the terrorizing silence while Jake walks around to the driver door. Although he rejoins you within seconds, it's enough time to let panic make its presence known, like it always does.

Jake fidgets in the driver’s seat and asks you the same antsy question for the second time this evening through his restless dorky smirk, “Ready?”

You have run out of no’s for him so you force a tight lipped smile and buckle yourself, nearly flinching at the click of your seatbelt. You tug the sash as tight as possible and just pray you aren’t making a fool of yourself.

Jake pulls into a parking spot and anchors his hand on your bouncing leg. The warm sensation of his limb is what reels you in from your own anxious realm to make contact with appraising eyes. You fold your hands in your lap and manage a smile.

You can’t help the way your breath gets caught on panic, “So, everyone is just in there? Waiting on us?”

“If it's showing up wounded you’re afraid of, don’t be,” his hand seeks the lock of your seatbelt and unfastens the buckle with a click, “You tell them that's just your battle scar, angel. Don’t hide how strong you are.”

You grant Jake a slight nod in agreement. Slowly, you push your car door open and extract yourself from the vehicle one limb at a time, as if you are some fragile thing that can shatter with a single misstep. Regret looms closer and closer as you cross the parking lot and pass everyone’s car one by one, each step dragging you towards the warzone you know awaits inside. You stall as your proximity to the battlefield diminishes.

Taking notice of your dawdling, Jake shifts to tower directly in front of you. The sudden advance pounds throughout your chest and hitches your breath but you refuse to fall back. He presses his forehead to yours and coaches you through a deep breath once your eyes refocus on his caramel brown ones.

“If it gets to be too much you don’t even have to say a word,” he gingerly takes your hands in his and squeezes in a triple pattern, “just like that, and I will immediately take you home. No questions asked. Like it never happened and we can try again when you’re ready.”

You focus on your breathing and mimic the intervals in which he gripped your hands.

“Good girl, just like that,” he praises your raging seas back to stillness and checks in with you for a third and final time, “are you ready?”

You nod your head and inhale as if you could take a drag of the courage he is emitting deep into your lungs. Jake releases your limbs back to you but replaces it with his palm against the small of your back as he leads you through the entrance of the bowling alley.

You soak in the dingy fluorescent lighting and are greeted with the smell of beer, leather, and frying grease. The humble sight is paired with a cacophony of pins clunking together in their gutters as classic country pours over the sounds of cheering and laughter.

Your feet already beg to turn back towards the door.

Jake waves to the group occupying the last two lanes, only they are bowling in the farthest and using the other as a barrier of isolation. Just like Jake said. This seems to cancel out a portion of your initial panic wave.

As you follow in Jake’s bee line around pool and foosball tables you recognize Josh, Danny, and Sam waving you over, along with a few other new faces.

The two of you are serenaded by scattered hellos. His brothers each take their turns to greet you, welcoming you with warm words of how elated they are to have you with them again. Jake strategically takes the opportunity to introduce you himself to the new faces to avoid any awkward interactions and customary physical contact. He turns to you as he announces your name with the most exuberant tooth-bearing smile. The one you first witnessed in that dusty record store on Christmas Eve. The one that spelled you absolutely his by New Years. The same giant smile you now only know to exist within the walls of your bedroom during late night laughs. This is Jake in complete bliss.

The beaming smile fades out as he goes to retrieve shoes for the two of you and is replaced by a flood of new ones belonging to his brothers as they catch up with you.

As your welcome parade dies down, your eyes immediately hunt for Jake seeking comfort, already approaching overstimulation. You see him off to the side of the lane’s designated sitting area, discreetly speaking with Sam. Jake’s hand finds its place on his hip and it occurs to you this exchange is one of hostility. Sam presents some unstable defense, eliciting an eye roll and a scoff from his older brother. Ultimately, you witness Jake give into whatever Sam’s plea might be as he heads back towards you with the shoes.

You timidly prompt Jake to tell you what is bothering him when he resides back to your orbit, sitting next to you on the bench.

“Nothing, Sam did something stupid but it doesn't matter anymore,” he looks down as he unconvincingly dismisses your question.

Wavy tresses that normally frame his face, curtain his features as he lets his head hang.

You lightly tug on one of the dangling coffee-brown strands to bring your favorite honey eyes back to your line of sight and give him a heartening smirk, “But you’ll tell me when it does, right?”

His burdened face breaks back to bliss as he tucks a rogue curl behind your ear, “Yes, of course.”

Jake lets his hand linger and for a second you are revisited by the marvelous familiarity of that time with Jake before Nashville.

The rental shoes hit the floor with a light thud as Jake lets them drop beside you. He relieves you of any obligation to participate knowing that you might not be up for it yet.

Grateful doesn’t even scratch the surface of how Jake is able to read you when you aren’t sure how to articulate yourself. You agree, telling him to check back next round.

After a few cycles of everyone’s turns you notice a peculiar pattern in Jake’s behavior. After every play the bowler would return to the lane, showered by hoots and hollers of praise and glory from your friends. This includes Jake, all except for when it came to the welcome of one person.

A girl. She is tall and lean with a long auburn bob, graced by delicate cartoon features and olive skin. Earlier she introduced herself as Claudia.

Everyone cheered upon her return to the kingdom. But not Jake. He did not shout. He did not clap. He did not smile. If she so much as let her gaze fall in your direction he would clench his jaw and check on you. Everytime single time. Like a tick.

You slide your hand on Jake’s mid thigh and rest your head against his shoulder. You feel him almost spooked by your touch. Other than when he came home earlier this week, you are rarely one to seek ease in his touch. You usually avoid all physical contact but especially are never the one to initiate it. However, Jake leans into you once your intention occurs to him.

You tilt your mouth up towards his ear so only he could hear your notion, “That’s her? Isn’t it?”

The muscle of his jaw protrudes at the very mention and he places his hand over yours, “I didn’t want to cause any commotion to further overwhelm you or make you uncomfortable. More than anything or anyone, I’m just happy you're here.”

You didn’t have a word for the strange sensation that followed being in her presence. Someone you thought you’d never meet. Someone you hoped to never meet. To put a name and face to the horror story of some wicked stranger who heartlessly spun your trauma without remorse between her fingers. Someone who wielded your weaknesses as a weapon to torment Jake. To turn the only man you trust against you without so much as a motive.

You are interrupted by the already buzzed boys asking for requests as they obnoxiously announce they’re headed towards the bar. Just as Jake’s brothers become absent, the girl with the auburn hair lifts herself from the opposite bench to head towards the restrooms, but not before the flashes you a sly smirk and cheekily waves and winks at Jake. She then swiftly disperses into the ladies room.

The grisly sound of Jake’s teeth grinding invades your ears as he shifts in his seat from physically cringing in outrage.

He growls through his clenched jaw, “That’s enough. I’m going to say something to that fucking prick.”

You discourage him, “No, Jake, please. It’s fine. Don’t give her the reaction she so blatantly wants. Seriously.”

“She fucking with us- she’s fucking with you,” he struggles to not to raise his voice and remain still in his seat.

“I know, but my goal is only to get through tonight,” you try to make him understand beyond his momentary red.

“She’s only going to get braver-,” he surveys your face and cuts himself off with an indecipherable flicker, “Fine, but only because you asked.”

He settles back in his seat appearing fine, his only tell being one leg vigorously bouncing up and down.

Jake seems to cool off though once his brothers are right back with beer and distractions. Claudia eventually returns from the restroom and you do your best to ignore her.

You reticently watch the boys bowl from your reserved spectator bench and ardently listen as they delight you with funny stories of what has happened since the last time they caught up with you. Your vigilance actually begins to wane and you feel yourself seeping into a plane of comfort and ease of enjoyment.

That is until you're being dragged back into reality by Claudia calling your name.

She casually accosts you with the loaded question, as if she is addressing the weather, “So I’m told you moved here from London, what brought you to the states?”

Your breath hitches in your throat. She knows exactly where the trigger is. Your shortest fuse to a spiral. You have no idea why Claudia is gunning for you, just that she is doing it well.

You feel Jake’s subtle touch to your knee and place your hand over him and squeeze.

One.

Your cheeks glow red as you burn alive.

“Well- I-,” you squeak out, “just needed a change of scenery.”

Pleased with the results of her game, Claudia continues, “Interesting. Well, tell me, why our little city? What’s Nashville hold for you? Other than your friend, Jake.”

Your hand clenches around Jake’s once more.

Two.

You feel Jake shift in anticipation, waiting for your third and final squeeze; a bull pawing before his charge. If Jake had his way he would have already put Claudia in her place and left. But he knows this night belongs to you and should be your decision, but you freeze.

In an instant, Jake discreetly turns his head to your ear, the decibel of his encouragement is hardly audible in its lull, “I’m so proud of you no matter how this night ends.”

Proud? Jake is proud of you? You had never really stopped to think about how he might perceive you.

In the midst of your storm you never sought past how he made you feel. You assumed he regards you with compassion and patience and loves you despite being this broken mess because that’s how he made you feel.

Never once did it occur to you that when Jake looks at you, it would be with eyes full of pride.

It isn’t until now that you fully realize how he craves you. It is clear he longs for your recovery and happiness and hungers to have you to himself. But you understand now he yearns for the time he had you in his corner. He aches to experience life with you, like the two of you used to. To walk into a room with you by his side and show you off and indulge in your presence. To be your equal. To be your partner. Though he loves to come home to you and regale you with stories of the road, more than anything he wishes to make you smile by recalling a shared memory instead. He misses who he is with you. But he wouldn’t dare confess such a selfish thought amongst your recent fragility.

You remove your hand from Jake’s and strain a cordial smile across your face.

You're terrified to stay but terrified to retreat. You fear if you go home now you might not ever leave again. And that is not an option. More than ever, you’re now miserably aware you can no longer survive without the courage that would dawn at the burning end of this anguishing night, you only need to push through.

You will your words to wield an ostensible confidence you do not possess, “Well actually this is probably my favorite thing to do anywhere, just spend time with loved ones. So why not Nashville?”

Before she can get in another word Josh returns from the lane and Jake curtly alerts Claudia it is her turn.

After that game ends everyone decides on one more for the night. Jake attempts to sit this round out but you insist he play and so he does. Although it does not take much convincing on your end.

He plays his turns briefly, immediately finding his seat next to you every time. He avoids all contact with Claudia and is mindful to keep you stimulated with conversation rather than your surroundings.

He hums, “So, what did you do for a whole week while I was gone, hmm?”

“I went outside for a walk,” you had almost forgotten to tell him, your brain had repressed the memory.

“Oh,” his tone turns up in genuine surprise, “How was that?”

Even though Jake has seen you through so much ugly, you still carry the small failures with a backbreaking shame.

“I ran back inside,” you grimace.

His brows knit together and bites his lip, “Were you alright after?”

You look down at your fidgeting hands in your lap and click your tongue, “That was the night you came home.”

He rests his pointer finger under your chin to raise your eyes back to his, “Well, all that matters is you’re here now. Even if you hadn’t come tonight, you’ve already overcome so much. And I know I’ve said it already but I’m proud of you.”

You don’t even have a chance to process his adulation as Claudia ambushes your bubble from her seat a few feet away.

“Enough chit-chat. You’re up, Zookeeper,” she smugly addresses the man beside you.

And just like that, everything all at once is consumed by swelling flames of a long-repressed scorching temper.

She must think she's so slick. She must think she is so fucking clever. She must assume you wouldn’t understand her reference. That no one would dare tell little frail you of her verbal assailments.

Or maybe she does hope you catch on. Maybe she thinks you’ll run and hide.

To your own surprise she isn’t so lucky.

Without so much as a moment’s sense or contemplation, venom commandeers your tongue and spurts past your lips and any prior inhibitions, “So just how big does the stick up your ass have to be in order for you to be such a raging bitch?”

She, along with everyone else within earshot, surrenders their aghast attention to you. Claudia's face is now painted with a red blaze. It's obvious she did not think you were going to burst from your timid and socially safe box, no one did.

She springs straight up and crosses her arms from her place on the opposing bench, “Excuse me?!”

Though you had been keeping to yourself you had been paying attention to the game. She couldn’t have hit more than 10 pins the whole time you’ve been here.

You reload your gun and fire off another round, “Is that also the reason you can’t bowl or are you just doing that for attention like everything else?”

Her face creases in bewilderment as she jumps to her feet, “What the fuck did you just say to me?”

Her attack stance has concerningly no effect on your newly ballsy demeanor. Jake doesn’t say a word but the way he stands to mimic Claudia’s body language speaks volume enough. She relaxes a bit but is still ready to pounce.

“Oh, I apologize,” you feign a pout, “I forgot you probably can’t hear very well with your head so far up your ass. Let me speak up.”

The distant sounds of snorting laughter and Sam choking on his drink as he spits it out reminds you of where you are.

A pang of guilt ceases your fire. You had given Claudia exactly what she wanted, but now it looked as if it was more than she could handle.

Normally, this would indicate victory. The old you would have basked in Claudia’s dumbfounded state. But now for some reason, you aren’t able to stomach making her feel any worse than you already have.

You back down from your reign and feel your face heat a bright red. Jake holds his hand out to gesture you to stand from the bench. As soon as you take it he squeezes three times and pulls you to your feet.

In all the ways you saw tonight ending, you definitely did not predict Jake being the one to call it quits.

He turns on his heels to address his brothers and friends, “Well, it’s getting kind of late so I suppose we should head home,” his shit-eating grin finds Claudia before she can regain any kind of composure, “We’ve had quite a lot of excitement for one night!”

You only have enough time to grab your purse and motion a goodbye to Jake’s brothers before he whisks you away from the wake of madness you had created.

Once in the shelter of Jake’s vehicle he asks if you’re okay. You respond with a disingenuous yes and neither of you whisper a word to each other for the rest of the car ride home.

You speed through your nightly regimen as if the sooner you shut your eyes the sooner the tides of slumber would wash over you and rinse away the day.

Yet you lay restless in your bed. You toss and turn, pleading for sleep to come but you’re convinced your prayers must have gotten lost.

After what feels like hours, you slip out of bed and throw on an oversized shirt and a pair of worn sweats you stole from Jake. You scamper about, not even certain of what you’re searching for until a tangible task to occupy your idle hands presents itself. You never thought you’d be grateful to arrive at a kitchen sink harboring dirty dishes. You fill the sink with hot water and soap and begin to scrub away.

Your laborious act is rewarded by the complete consumption of your thoughts. Your focus is on the cleanliness of the plates only.

That is until you hear the clinking of glass on the bar cart across the kitchen. You don’t even bother to avert yourself from the chore; you know it’s Jake pouring himself a late night drink.

You dare to ask the question first before Jake can pry, “I know why I’m still up, but why are you?”

“Well, I was in bed until someone decided now would be a great time to do the dishes,” you hear the ice in his drink clatter against the glass.

You attempt to scrub quieter but don’t actually stop.

Jake has no regard for subtly as he dives right into what he knows is terrorizing you sleepless, “I thought you handled tonight fine.”

“I wasn’t ready for- I shouldn’t have-” you hesitate for a moment before continuing the dishes rather than your train of thought.

You hear Jake’s tone slightly pick up, “Shouldn’t have what? Shouldn’t have stood up for yourself? Should have let that cunt walk all over you?”

“Jake-”

You can hear his boiling frustrations begin to erupt past his control again, “No- I'm glad you handled yourself that way! She would have just kept bulldozing!”

You pointlessly try to illustrate your crime, “I stooped to her level-“

Yet he has no desire to understand your fault, his hand not responsible for his glass flying through the air to cut you off, “She deserved it!”

You suddenly feel queasy at the night’s recap, almost dropping the dish you are holding from fatigue, “Jacob, were we even in the same room?! I mean, did you see the look on her face? How can I expect understanding for my pain and trauma and then go and make someone else feel like that?”

The kitchen fell into a still silence, the only audible signs of life being the dying suds in the sink and a remorseful huff from Jake. In his rooting for your full recovery, it hadn’t occurred to him that you might not want to return to everything you once were, including your existing flaws.

A crackled feedback of speakers introduces itself to the air, indicating Jake connected his music to the sound system throughout the kitchen. A soft blue melody pours from the stereo, confirming your assumption as you feel him come from behind you.

He nimbly removes the plate from your grip and places it to soak in the soapy sink water. He takes the nearest dish rag in his hand and delicately dries yours off before placing them around his back, leaning in to curl his arms around your afflicted stature.

Wallowing in your fresh wounds, you naturally resist when he begins swaying you back and forth with the rhythm of the music.

His speech abandons all previous conviction it carried seconds earlier as he softly prays, “Come on, I’m sorry I got upset with you, angel. Dance with me please? It’s been so long.”

You loosen your demeanor and sway with Jake, always wanting to grant him yes on the small things you could.

He accepts your movement as his exoneration and continues to candy you with kind words, “You know, I had no clue what I was in for the first time I laid eyes on you. No clue how in over my head I was- No clue I’d get to feel this way about you.”

As he feels you further give into his motions, he places his hand in the dip of your waist to properly waltz you about the kitchen. With his opposite he tucks your stray bedhead hairs behind your ear and gives you a small tight lipped smirk. His smile is one that you have yet to deny so you wrap your arms around his shoulders and follow his feet, fully accepting your fate.

You rest your head to his bare clavicle as a familiar steel guitar resonates throughout your kitchen. The smallest chuckle escapes him as he begins to hum along with the melody.

Why are you still crying?

Your pain is now through

Please, forget those teardrops

Let me take them from you

The love you are blessed with

This world's waiting for

So, let out your heart please, please

From behind that locked door

Still whirling around the kitchen tile to the swaying melody, Jake fully presses against you and rests his chin atop the crown of your head. Left. Right. Right. Left. Just like the first time on that New Year's Eve. Just like he taught you.The recording blends with Jake as he begins to fully sing along with George Harrison.

It's time we start smiling

What else should we do?

With only this short time

I'm gonna be here with you

And the tales you have taught me

From the things that you saw

Makes me want out your heart, please, please

From behind that locked door

You’re not sure if you’re overwhelmed from the evening’s events or maybe it's Jake singing along with former Beatle’s kind words, but something inside you breaks as your face begins to stream warm with tears. You cling to Jake and hide your face in his chest like a scared child. He holds you steady as you quake under his arms.

A sharp sob breaks out of you and into his flesh, “I miss me too, Jake! I want to come home to you more than anything.”

“I know,” his voice is a calm surface, contradicting his heart pounding erratically under your cheek, “but you’re going to be alright. You will heal, I can feel it. All in good time, angel.”

You fight to steady your speech against hiccuping breaths, “I’ve never fought this hard. It’s never been this dark before, Jake! How do you know that I haven’t burnt out and this is what's left of me? How do you know I’m not stuck this way?”

He answers without a moment’s hesitation, as if he had rehearsed his words and held onto them for a thousand years, “Because, angel, I’ve seen so many places and people and there is only one of you. You’re a marigold. An eternal flame. A rey of light bestowed to me by the sun herself. Your’s is not an energy that can be demolished.”

You squeeze your arms around his neck tighter, abolishing any unwelcome space between the two of you.

Jake caresses small soothing circles against the small of your back, “Whenever you’re ready, I love you now and I'm ready to love whoever you are going to be.”

There are those words again. Words you hadn’t spoken to him till you blurted them out in a half-conscious panicked confession. Words he hadn’t dared speak to you since London. But here he is confirming his love for you in the midst of your wounds and extending it to the woman you would be after they healed.

Swept in your own existential whirlwind, your fingertips mindlessly explore the warmth of his exposed skin as you tilt your head up and close in to his face to appreciate his delicate features there. He realizes you are searching for his lips before you do. Jake lowers his head to help you achieve your hunt, brushing the tip of his nose over the peak of your top lip and across your wet cheek until his warm breath hovers over yours. You swear hours must pass when you finally feel his lips press into yours but not in a kiss, more like he is relearning your mouth, trying to recall your taste before savoring it. Taking the time to survive on the same air, waiting for you to give in.

Heedlessly, you rush against him, lips plush as you remember. As if you are magnetic, Jake’s starving hands fly to cradle your jaw, his thumbs caressing your cheeks and swiping the rolling tears away.

Your appetite swells quickly and you push your weight into Jake until he slowly backs into the nearest kitchen countertop, eliciting a hum that tickles your lips. You stretch on your tiptoes to better reach his hungry mouth. He immediately wraps his hands into the curve of your waist and shifts to lift you on the counter. Jake’s lips never leave yours as he plops you down on the espresso wooden slab.

His tongue graces your lips and you promptly grant him access. He impatiently laps into your mouth as his touch further constricts around your midriff. You feel his starved fingers fighting not to venture across your skin.

Finally, all at once Jake reignites your desire. Like someone turned on the light in a dark room you had been stuck in. Suddenly, you remember where you are and what you had been doing in that room, like you picked up exactly where you left off.

Jake has been your only shelter in this storm. He has put you back together so many times now and remained patient every step of the way. He took care of you in London when he could have looked the other way and nobody, including yourself, would have known. He hauled you away from the monsters Europe held for you. He’s been your only friend and liberation when you couldn’t even escape the very walls of your bedroom. If your malaise hadn’t warded him off yet nothing would.

You finally recognize Jake isn’t leaving. He always says it, but it seemed like this abstract concept, but he is here in front of you still voracious for more even after all he has witnessed.

His devotion is now this tangible thing.

You can see it in the way he looks at you and fights for you. You feel it in the way his fingers grace your skin and hands grab at you. Hear it in the way he sings your name and groans in restraint to devour you. Taste it on his bourbon and peach velvet tongue. Jake is not going anywhere and he’s not going to hurt you.

You depart from his lips to catch your breath and contemplate if this is solid ground or a passive breeze. You retrieve his hand from where it is clasped around your waist, calloused, heavy, extending much longer and thicker than your own digits. You run your fingertips over his knuckles studying the lines there, fidgeting because you’re uncertain how to articulate the arrival of your long awaited craving.

Jake's eyes grow wide, terrified he's done something wrong, “I’m sorry! I don’t-”

“Jake, I want you,” you can’t even stand to hear him finish.

His breath hitches at your words, “No, it's alright. You don’t have anything to prove to me. Tonight has been more than enough.”

It has been months since the two of you have touched each other. He was more than satisfied to just be near you and he did not want to lose or confuse or overwhelm you.

You wrap the material of his shirt around your fingers and tug him in close once more, not even letting the sting of his rejection sink in, “Jake I need to feel you again.”

Still gripping the half open button down, you commandeer his exposed neck to your reckless mouth. He growls a, “Fuck,” into the open air as you begin to kiss, lap, nibble and suck his salty skin.

He groans as you mark his collarbone, “Are you sure, Angel?”

You whisper your third consent into his ear and without a beat missed Jake whisks you off the counter. Your feet barely meet the tile before he's grabbing your hand and ushering you out of the kitchen, up the stairs, and down the frigid dark hall till you reach his bedroom door.

He twists the knob and the hinges groan as he pushes the entrance open for you. You take your time entering his room, your fuzzy socks slipping and sliding on the hardwood floor over to his bed. You sit, sinking into the soft mattress and place your hands in your lap as he turns on his salt lamp, illuminating the room in a coat of warm light.

Your favorite smile grows wild on his face at the sight of you waiting for him on his bed. The elated man hurries over and presses a quick kiss to you before he places his hands on the tops of your thighs.

He levels himself with your line of sight, his every word carrying what seems to be the weight of the world, “You’re in control here. You say the word and it is my command.”

You whisper a rushed yes and he pulls you back to your feet, gripping your hips. He once again envelopes your lips in his, but this time it is sweet and slow. There is no haste, no power dynamic, only the two of you basking in the warm essence of the other.

He swings your hips closer to him and you feel his hard bulge press into your stomach. Jake's fingers scatter for the hem of your shirt. Hips not daring to leave you, his torso repels in order to slip your top off, exposing your goosebump ridden skin and breasts to his soft eyes and brisk air of the room.

You in turn, undo the few done up buttons of his shirt. You lean into him to slip the sleeves off his shoulders, your lips catching along the muscle of his jaw as you undress him.

His hands travel down your sides and slip under the waistband of your sweats, his warmth buzzing across your cool skin. He traces the curve of your hips under the fleece material and migrates to grab your ass until your feet have left the hardwood floor and locked around his back.

At this new angle he laps one of your erect nipples into his velvet mouth with ease and your whimper floats into the room. He groans with a mouth full of your tit as your hands slip into his tousled hair and tug, the vibrations rippling through you and straight to your core as he hums against your pebbled breasts.

He staggers, carrying you till he reaches his bed and leans to lay you down on your back. Jake casts his face over your pelvis and begins to slowly tug down your sweats, pressing his mouth to every newly unenveloped inch of your skin as it peeks out from behind the material being pulled down further and further. Jake’s open mouth kisses trail your hips, thighs, and down to your ankles, tossing the pants somewhere on the floor near his closet after he’s fully removed your pajamas.

He brings his knees up to the mattress and props himself over you, crawling till his mouth is hovering over yours again. He looks down between your bodies as he drags his faint touch below your naval, over your mound, and slips through your folds to feather your clit.

He swallows your moan as you are reintroduced to his kiss. You struggle to stay still as his loving fingers press into your labia till he finds your entrance. You swear you are far more sensitive since the last time he touched you, almost as if this is the first time he’s had you.

He pulls away from your mouth to gingerly check in with you, “This is okay, babygirl?”

“Fuck- more than okay,” you breathlessly whimper against his pink pout.

At your reassurance he inserts a long finger inside you, relishing in the way you squirm underneath him.

“Please- Jake, more,” you’re already begging.

Without any hesitation he inserts his middle fingers and watches as he starts pumping his digits in and out of you, glistening in your slick.

He begins a beeline of open-mouth kisses down the valley of your breasts and past your belly button. He reaches your slit and slightly parts them to suck your clit into his mouth, swirling his warm plush tongue around the swollen bud.

He returns his fingers, this time curling them up inside you, causing your hips to buck towards his face. The lewd sounds of Jake lapping your clit and fucking you with his fingers fills your head. He moans into you as you writhe in his hard-working mouth.

“I don’t think I can wait any longer,” you desperately command, “Jake, I- fuck, baby- I need you.”

“Just be patient, angel, let me take care you,” he croons against your bundle of nerves, “I’ve- I’ve waited so long for you.”

Jake continues drilling into you, his thick fingers pumping inside you and velvet tongue fluttering against your clit. All at once, your climax sneaks up on you, a drive by of ecstasy, sweeter than you could ever remember or commit to memory. Your legs cut off Jake’s air supplying, squeezing around him till you tremble and you cum right into his mouth without so much as a warning.

But he refuses to cease his oral attack on you. Instead, he continues to consume you at a painfully dizzy pace. You hardly register the symphony of your own whimpers and slurping of Jake sloppily eating you out.

“Fuck! Ja- I- Please, Jake, I need to feel you inside me,” you restively whine through your overstimulation.

Like you’ve casted a spell on Jake, his mouth and fingers part from you without another word. Though the dark of his eyes and furrow of his brows tell you a story of struggle; if Jake had his way, his head would still be lost between your shaking thighs.

He steps to the floor to shimmy out of his pants and boxers to free the pretty pink cock you are desperate for. You watch his hard length bob about as he hops right back on the mattress.

He wraps his hands around your ankles and pushes them in toward you to bend your knees upward. Jake admiringly watches his own hands run along your shins and up your thighs until he stops and squeezes at the thick of them. He spreads your legs open to gain access to your inner thigh and presses more kisses and nibbles there.

When his lips reach your folds Jake laps his tongue though for one last taste before he pulls away to gravitate his core closer to your dripping center. His consuming touch leaves you to grab his cock, collecting the gloss at his tip to pump his hand over himself a few times before pressing his painfully pink head to your lips.

You gasp in pure anticipation and whimper when Jake flicks his throbbing tip over your swollen clit. Lining himself up to your entrance, he looks back to you one last time for your consent.

He rests his arms down beside you to anchor himself in your atmosphere and rasps in your ear, “Ready, angel?”

“I’ve never wanted this more, Jake,” you pant out against his neck.

At your cue, he thrusts his hips into you and hisses in your ear. Your drawn out moan sounds through the room as your cunt welcomingly stretches for Jake.

He looks at you with curious eyes, concerned if you’re still comfortable.

You run a gentle finger along his hairline before brushing the rest through his chestnut waves and nod, “I’m okay, baby, you can move.”

You see relief flash on his face but it is quickly replaced by something else when he plunges deep inside you to the hilt. Jake begins to pump himself in and out of you at a deliciously slow rhythm.

This is so different from anything you’ve ever done with him. Fooling around with Jake had always been some thrilling primitive game. And while this moment is still animalistic, it is also raw and real and sweet and tender. The two of you taking care of each other. The two of you a union.

You are consumed by Jake; he is the only thing you can see, feel, taste, smell, and hear. You can’t recall a moment before him or see a thing beyond. Everything belongs to him. At this moment Jake could do no wrong.

He speeds his pace up and laps a stripe across your neck, “Oh fuck- I missed you, pretty girl.”

The only words you could find were babbled moans.

Praises absent of any satire or malice, he coos, “Oh, someone likes being called pretty? Well good because you are. You’re the prettiest girl.”

Without any real ideation, the desire blurts out of you, “Jake- Fuck- want to be your pretty girl, Jake!”

Both of you caught off guard by the demand, he pulls away from his work on your ear and his hips stall in divided attention. Jake blinks at you wide-eyed, waiting for some redirection of blood flow back to his brain to process your words. You swallow down your mournful whine that follows the loss of momentum, knowing you brought it on.

You are summoned back to coherency by the rasping of your name as he blesses your face with kisses, “You want to be my pretty little thing? Want me to make you all mine?”

Fully wrapping his mind around the concept, his strokes return harder and faster. That familiar sweltering pressure you’ve missed begins to burn in your pelvis, rolling your eyes back.

A stuttered moan is all you can manage, “Yes- Please, Jake!”

Jake brings his hand to cup your chin, pressing his thumb against your bottom lip and slows his hips yet again to bring you back to earth, “I need to hear you say it, angel.”

You open your eyes to meet his dark chocolate irises and focus all your energy into gathering your words, “Yes, Jake. I’m yours and I want you to be all mine.”

You are graced with the sight of that giant smile of his, of which he presses to your lips and attempts to kiss you through his teeth baring elation.

He then swings his hips back to a mind numbing pace.

He can’t help the audible smirk in his demands, “Good girl. Now, will my baby cum for me?”

Your only acknowledgement to his request is a broken stream of moans, whimpers, and muttered swears as he swivels his hips, hitting the spot only he ever manages to find.

You are rendered to a puddle of incoherent begging, “Please, Ja- Baby- Fuck- I love you, Jacob, don’t stop!”

You feel your second climax begging to burn through you like a good smoke. With every swing of Jake’s hips, you inhale his saccharine nicotine deep into your lungs and puff him out, only to drag him in again. A sweet slowburn of ashes till you turn out.

Jake begins to thrust inside you even faster and reaches a hand down to rub your clit. You’re lifted by his gravity, arching your back as your pussy begins to contort around him.

“Fuck- do that again, babe,” he hisses in ecstasy, “squeeze me and tell me that you love me when you cum. Please?”

His begging is enough to set off your release. You try your best to look at him but your eyes roll back as the tension in your stomach bursts in a white heat. You feel that electric buzz in your chest ripple throughout you. Your only tether to reality is fulfilling Jake’s sweet need.

You squeeze your walls around Jake as tight as you can, sinking him even further inside you as your rasped confession breaks against involuntary moans and squeals, “Fuck- Ja- I love you so much- Jake! I didn’t even know- it was possible to- to be so consumed by one person. I love- I love you, Jacob!”

He fights to remain composed, coaching you down from your high as he approaches his, “Easy, princess, I’ve got- I got you. I’ve missed you so bad, baby, please let me have it.”

Your senses become bombarded by overstimulation as you finish on his twitching cock inside you but remain attentive to help Jake finish. You know he is close when his hips begin to sputter.

You buck your hips upwards to finish his motions and clench around him one last time as you feel his cock jerking inside you. Jake’s eyes flutter shut and his head drops to your shoulder as slack jaw mutters your name like a swear. Jake slips a hand under your head to cradle you closer as he fights though his final stokes.

You take the opportunity to start sucking and kissing encouragement against his neck, “Come on, baby boy. You’re so good to me. I want all of you, Jake. Want to feel full of you. Want to love you.”

Your serenade shoves him over the edge and his bruising grip sears into your hip bone as he lets go. With a blissed out grunt of your name, you feel his release coat your walls and fill you.

He collapses on to you, his weight sinking you further into the soft mattress. You wish to exist in this amber lit moment forever, convinced the weight of Jake’s head and rhythm of him catching his breath against your shoulder is the safest shelter you’d ever find.

You wrap your arms around Jake to rub his glossy back, still heaving in recovery. He hums underneath your jaw and begins to lazily kiss the muscle there. The two of you seem to exist in your own plane before Jake breaks the silence, telling you to stay put while runs to fetch you a warm rag.

Upon his arrival you grab the cloth from Jake, his eyes devouring the scandalous scene you are cleaning him from your dripping thighs. You catch his ravenous stare and fold the rag to the opposite side. You earn a beaming smile and bashful giggle from Jake as you begin to gently swipe away at the beads of sweat that decorate his glistening face.

He nuzzles into your touch, allowing you for once to care for him. But as you clean him, Jake catches your hand in his to cease your movements. You witness a short scene of grief and guilt play across the very features you were just nursing.

“Was it- not-,” you can’t string your sentence together to bare the thought of Jake regretting his actions.

“No- No- That was- I’m so glad we- Its just- It reminded me of the last-,” he scrambles for his words as a few thoughts try to make their way all at once.

You squeeze his hand still in yours and tend to his uncertainty with a smile of reassurance, “Jake?”

He reflects your gesture, taking a deep breath before putting his concern to words this time, "I never apologized for the way I treated you."

Out of all the things you expected Jake to confess in this moment, an apology is certainly not one, "What the hell are you talking about, Jacob? You have nothing to apologize for. You've been nothing but good to me."

He shakes his head with a slight chuckle, indicating you misunderstood, "No- I meant before your move to Nashville. I was just- I was cruel to you and I'm so sorry for what happened between us."

It seems like lifetimes ago, you almost want to giggle at Jake’s amends, having already made up for it in more than a million ways, "Well, trust me, you have more than made up for it. And we are finding our way back now."

Jake pulls you into him for another kiss as he presses a small chuckle and that pretty smile into your lips before scooping you off the bed and into his arms. You devoutly wrap your limbs around Jake to stabilize yourself as he playfully peppers your skin with quick pecks and carries you to the bath he had already started running.

He slowly lets you down to the floor and checks the temperature of the water. Once he is satisfied, he ties up his hair while stepping into the tub. Jake sits and settles his back against the wall before extending his hand up to guide you in. You utilize Jake for balance as your feet dip into the steaming water. You twist away from your guide as the rest of you sinks into the warm bath, replicating his movements.

Jake’s arm grips the lip of the tub as an anchor when the other wraps around your waist as he tugs you into him, your back flush against his chest. You let your head fall against his shoulder to find his lips yet again. A blissed out sigh slips from Jake and tickles your cheek.

Your call comes out smaller than you intend, “Jake?”

His only acknowledgement is a vague hum as he tucks his face away in your neck.

You timidly purpose, “No more games, right?”

You only receive another fatigued hum in agreement, “Of course. No more games.”

You proceed to pry for an answer he's already given in ten thousand different tongues, “Be honest with me? You meant what you said? Or was it the high of the moment?”

“I’m not quite sure what you’re referring to but you should know I have a girlfriend now,” he giggles at himself into your skin, having not removed himself from your neck.

You roll your eyes at Jake. You know he is merely teasing you but you do not have the courage to ask twice.

Jake pries himself from you to grab the tan bar soap and lather it in his vast calloused hands. The smell of vanilla and patchouli shamefully teleports you back to days he had to help you bathe.

He runs the suds down your arms and speaks softly against the shell of your ear, “I meant every syllable.”

Jake rakes his fingers against the skin of your forearms before he places his stretched out hand below your open palms, your limbs posing so helpless and dainty in comparison to his.

He studies the size difference before interlocking your fingers and bringing them to his lips, “This is all I’ve ever wanted. And now it's finally mine.”

Jake places your hands back in your lap to retrieve more soap.

He lathers the suds around your torso and slightly presses his finger into the meat of your stomach, “This is mine.”

You giggle and he continues, the goofy smile plastered on his face audible in his tone.

Jake wraps his digits, finger by finger around your waist, “And this is mine.”

He spreads the suds up across your breast, massaging them and running his knuckles along your nipples as he lightly teases, “I’m very pleased to say these are now mine.”

With his fingertip, he blazes a trail along your clavicle, his lips following the route as he adds, “and this.”

With his hands still on your shoulder he lightly guides your weight forward to gain access to your back. He sweeps your half drenched raven locks above your head and grabs a tie from the tub caddy to place your hair up. His digits meet your shoulder blade and flutter down your back in lawless streaks.

You know he is tracing exactly where your scars are. The scars you’d hardly seen, avoiding them in the mirror at all costs, but you know exactly where the tissue lies.

Jake feels you cringe underneath his touch but doesn’t let you squirm from his reach.

He places his pink lips to the discolored welts there, kissing blessings and vows to your scarred flesh, “And this- I want all of this too.”

His mouth continues up your neck, biting and lapping until he reaches your jaw. Jake places his fingertips on your chin and tilts your head towards a full body mirror across from the tub, directing your vision to your reflection.

“And this stunningly gorgeous face, the one I see everytime I close my eyes,” he punctuates every word with a kiss to your eyelashes, the tip of your nose, and cheeks, “All you see is mine."

He finally reunites with your lips, “And I am irrevocably and absolutely yours. You are all I’ve ever wanted. I am so in love with you, baby.”

thank you so much for reading, pretty please let me know what you think🫶🏼

taglist❤️‍🩹 - @ageofbajabule @alwaysonthemend @anythingforjtk @becinabubblegvf @dancingcarbon @dannys-dream @dayumclarizzel @do-it-jakey-baby @dont-go-home-without-me @edgingthedarkness @fomopheobe @gretasfallingsky @gretavangirlie @gretavanglimmers @gretavangroupie @gvf23 @gvfmarge @hannahrk @heckingfrick @hollyco @hsfallingsky @imleavingyoufornewyork @kiszkazz @klarxtr @itsafullmoon @jakesguitarsolo @jakesmustache @jakeysbuttsheeks @lipstickitty @littleficsworld @livkiszka @lyndz2names @mindastreamofcolours @mountain-in-springtime @mrbrownstne @nina-23-45 @notjordie-gvf @smoking-jakelane @sparrowofthedawnsworld @kiszkas-canvas @takenbythemadness @thewritingbeforesunrise @fuckyoutommie @tripthelightfatality @vanfleeter @violet-hayes @wetkleenex-gvf @zoe-tally06

[shes4twnksinatrnchct]

Hell of a Show

Jake Kiszka x fem oc

Fifteen years after resigning from Greta Van Fleet, for reasons undisclosed to the public, Coley Payne is asked by her former band members to tell her side of the story.

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, explicit language, angst, fluff, first love, drug and alcohol abuse, mental health struggles, character death, familial grief, reference to sexual situations, *explicit sexual situations (smut warnings will be mentioned pertaining to each chapter it occurs in).

Please keep in mind this is a work of fiction and enjoy!

***LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED***

Prologue

2039

His shaky fingers curl around the key in the ignition, freeing it and shutting the car off as the sun glares down on him through the windshield. 

The blonde brick of the quaint house fills him with an anxious dread because of who resides within its walls—and perhaps it wouldn’t be weighing so heavy on his heart if the last time he saw her hadn’t ended the way it did. 

The blacked-out shades of his sunglasses pair perfectly with his blank expression, a heavy breath leaving him as he gets out and shuts the door. 

A familiar brunette is walking back to the front porch from the mailbox, already thumbing through a stack of envelopes and picking one out. 

“She’s not gonna read it.” Collins informs her aunt’s ex-boyfriend, handing the unread letter to him. 

Glancing down at it, he sees it’s from Sam. 

Their last ditch effort to coax Coley back into the limelight has been on the cusp of communicating via carrier pigeon being that she threatened to start blocking phone numbers if anyone else mentioned a word to her about it. 

Josh, Sam, and Danny have all extended invitations and Olive Branches—though the latter has been unnecessary because her leaving wasn’t messy or disrespectful. 

Contrary to popular belief amongst fans, there was no big catastrophe that got Coley kicked out. 

In fact, it would have been easier on Jake if there had been. 

And, now, his only saving grace for showing up unannounced at her house is that he’s the only one who hasn’t tried to contact her. 

“Is she home?” He asks the young woman, Collins stepping onto the front porch. 

“She is.” She flatly tells him. 

“Can you let her know I’m here?”

Collins turns to look at him, briefly. 

The last time Coley and Jake spoke in person was the weekend of Elton John’s 90th birthday celebration she and Collins attended—along with the guys. 

That was two years ago, and though Collins never knew the details of their reunion, she could put two and two together when her aunt  stormed into their hotel room the next morning in nothing but the shirt Jake had worn the night before, ferociously packed her things, and told her niece,“We’re leaving. Now.”

“I don’t know. Are you gonna piss her off again?” Collins quips, furrowing her brows. 

Though she’s only about twenty years older than she was back then, she’s still that smart-mouthed kid that would kick him out of his own bed in the middle of the night to curl up next to her aunt—her and her younger brother, both. 

“That’s the only reason I’ve been placed on this Earth.” He tells her somewhat impatiently. 

She rolls her eyes and steps inside the house, calling out, “Aunt Coley!”

“Yeah?!” He hears her say back.

A box fan is the only sound in the house aside from the low speaking of the TV from the living room while the heat from summer infiltrates the home in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. 

She sweeps her dirty blonde hair off of her neck, pulling it into a clip while following the sound of her niece’s voice and breezing by the narrow table in the hallway that’s stacked with recent months-worth of letters she’s been ignoring from former close friends—along with the phone calls and texts she’d magically forget to return. 

“There’s a man here to see you.” Collins informs her with a lack of enthusiasm. 

“HVAC?” Coley inquires with relief, having been battling the fight of no air conditioning for days, now. 

He feels as if he’s going to faint the closer her steps grow to the front door, his breath growing all the more complicated to keep steady as her voice permeates through the house. 

“Unless your ex-boyfriend started a new career—no.” She replies. 

A smile takes his features hostage at the sound of Coley’s laugh, a sound he’s missed more than he’d been able to put into words for the last fifteen years—instead scrambling to hear it in the joy of other women and hoping that it’d make him as happy, to no avail. 

Coley laughs because she assumes Collins is just bullshitting her, and the stir in Jake’s gut worsens when she abruptly stops upon realize it’s not a joke. 

“What?” 

“He’s outside. He told me to tell you he’s here.” The younger woman shrugs, watching her aunt’s face display a multitude of emotions—settling on one of ornery frustration. 

The door swings open, only leaving a screen door between the two of them. 

Blue eyes go wide, the wind being beat out of her the moment she sees him. 

Immediately, she’s snapping around to make sure Collins hasn’t followed her to be nosy. 

Before Jake can properly explain the reason for his visit, her nostrils are flaring, and she’s hissing out a sharp, “Seriously? They sent you?” while she opens the door and steps onto the porch with her arms crossed.

Irritation leaks from her pores as she stares up at Jake and waits for him to say anything back. 

He’s too focused on the fact that she seemingly appears to look even better than she did the last time they saw one another, aging like fine wine. 

The explanation he planned to present has evaporated from his mind, and the longer he looks at her, the more dumb he feels himself become. 

“Hi,” Is all he can muster, just like the last time he’d been face to face with her despite the fact it was the first time in thirteen years they’d crossed paths. 

Only the lack of conversation last time was easier to blame on the amount of people present, that is until they both got a couple drinks in themselves and slipped from the crowd. 

Now, it’s only the two of them, bright eyed and sober, and Jake can’t manage more than one syllable. 

Coley’s just as disoriented, only she’s better at hiding it, disguising it in anger when she asks, “What the hell are you doing here?”

It’s now that Jake has to regain his balls and composure, clearing his throat. 

“I was in town and thought I’d swing by.” He rubs his nose, not even trying to hide his nervousness with being confronted by her so directly.

“You were in town?” She inquires, raising her brows.

The tone of her voice and bitchy expression on her face melts him out of his passive shyness, his eyes narrowing at her. 

“Yeah.” Jake states, leaving no room for doubt, but Coley finds one reason not to buy his bullshit…

“You were casually in town four hours away from your home?” She flatly asks, next. 

“You’re not gonna invite me inside?” He avoids her question blatantly, a smirk coming to his lips that further stokes at her vexed demeanor. 

“I don’t let strangers in my house.” She’s quick to rebuttal. “Especially when they’re here to harass me on their brother’s behalf because he can’t accept a simple, ‘no’.” 

“You were expecting Josh to accept, ‘no’?” Jake scoffs, a dark brow darting upward over his sunglasses. 

“Being that we’re all at the grown age of forty-three? Yeah, Jake. I did expect him to.” 

Ignoring her strike, he states, “You look good,” while shamelessly eyeing her. “Are you getting shorter?”

“You look tired.” Coley fires back. “You should probably lay off the booze. And the pot. And the road.” 

Her last line has a bite to it that he can admit is somewhat warranted with their past. 

“That was my plan until I had to come down here and make sure you were alive.” Scoffing it out, he glances around the yard—never having seen her house for himself. 

Coley watches him do so, using his distracted disposition to take a moment to appreciate his own good looks. 

He’s still keeping his hair long, and his facial hair thicker, and his skin is still disgustingly wrinkle-free despite the sun he’s soaked in through the years. 

“Well, I’m alive.” She says, her tone rushing him to finish up and leave, but he continues taking his time. “And well.” 

He’s looking down at her again with the last addition to her reassurance. 

“Are you?” 

“Yes.” Coley nods. 

“Hmm.” 

“‘Hmm’? Why are you ‘hmm’ing? What’s there to ‘hmm’?” She demands, next, her eyes narrowing at him as the words topple out of her and her head shakes. 

“I mean, adamantly avoiding your friends is not the actions of someone who’s well.” 

“I’m not avoiding anybody. I’m just avoiding whatever it is Josh and Constance are working on.” Coley informs him, her mouth spitting out the name of their former manager while simultaneously handling his brother’s with care. 

“It’s not just Josh and Connie. All of us are involved—” He informs her, throwing his hand out to gently grasp her arm when she lets out a sarcastic laugh and turns to go back inside as he adds, “—And we don’t feel comfortable speaking for you.” It’s finished out genuinely, Coley glaring at the black screens over his eyes, fighting to see the brown of his irises through them while he forces himself to drop her arm. 

“Then don’t. It’s not anybody’s business what happened. That’s why I’ve gone out of my way not to talk about it publicly.” She reminds him. 

Without explicitly mentioning their last conversation, she once again takes a dig at him. 

It’s the source of such hostility, between years wasted on him and tears cried over him. 

But he can easily blame her for the same sins that she blames him for—which all boil down to simply wanting different things. 

He clenches his jaw briefly as he swallows his pride and starts, “Coley, I was an ass the last time we spoke—” He stops when she pulls his sunglasses from his eyes to make him look her in the eyes upon the realization he’s about to apologize, and he watches as she tosses the shades to the chair sitting close to the door, biting his tongue when she crosses her arms again and peers up at him. “—I can admit that, and I can say, ‘I’m sorry,’ but you’re not completely blameless in all of this either.” 

“And this is why I’m not speaking about this shit.” She argues. “Because you still have it in your head that me leaving the band for  my family was some unforgivable trespass.”

“You leaving the band wasn’t something that needed forgiveness—but it wasn’t just the band you left, was it?” He asks calmly, knowing that he has her pinned, and has always had her pinned with the question that she still refuses to acknowledge fifteen years later. 

“Get back in your car, drive off to Nashville, or whatever interstate you won’t stay off of, and leave me alone.” She says, turning again to open the door but he kicks his boot out to shut it once more. 

“Coley.” He mumbles and she shakes her head and won’t look at him, teary eyes keeping on the door inches from her face. “Look, nobody  sent me here, okay? I just…” He trails off as he tries to put into words what he’s trying to say. “…Kayce called me after Connie reached out to him trying to get in contact with you about it and I got worried.” 

Of course her oldest nephew had turned to Jake after Coley explicitly stated she didn’t want to talk about it. 

Kayce and his little brother Rhett had spent more time trying to convince their aunt to participate in whatever documentary Josh had been cooking up about the band ever since the singer had mentioned it two years prior. 

“He thinks it’s important that you talk about it, because the more you don’t, the more people take it as an opportunity to believe whatever made-up bullshit they’ve created to explain it for themselves. And I agree with him completely. We all do. What’s out there is so far from the truth, and it's not fair to you.”

She doesn’t reply immediately, knowing the point he's making is a good one, having her own various frustrations with the lies being spun around her departure from the group.

They'd all been reading lies for years surrounding why she left the band: imaginary tales of her drug addiction issues, how difficult she had been to work with, and her lack of talent which resulted in dead weight the three instrumentalists had to carry--all of which were completely alleged, only being speculated by people who either had nothing better to do, or begrudged individuals who Coley perhaps wasn't the nicest to for good reason.

She had always kept her mouth shut and just let everyone talk, requesting that her niece and nephews, family, friends, and former bandmates do the same...

And here's her opportunity to speak up for herself, in her own words, with the support and backing of her former bandmates--making her words, their words.

Jake isn't going to grovel with her, not having the energy to at the moment, and relents.

Removing his foot from the door to free her, he steps to grab his sunglasses so he can leave. 

Coley turns to face him while he walks away, and as he's stepping down the stairs of her front porch, he comes to a halt when she finally asks, “How long is all of this going to take?”

1 YEAR LATER

In 2012, rock band Greta Van Fleet was born from the outskirts of Frankenmuth, Michigan.

The original line-would exchange and expand to consist of founder Jacob Kiszka (Lead Guitarist), his brothers: Samuel Kiszka (Bassist), and Joshua Kiszka (Lead Vocalist), as well as Daniel Wagner (Drum Kit), and Coley “C.J.” Payne (Rhythm Guitarist, Backing Vocalist).

In 2024, the established group of five would shift, as Payne would announce her departure from the band.

Neither Greta Van Fleet, nor C.J. Payne made a comment on the matter, initially.

The silence was only broken when C.J. gave her only on-record citing of her split the year to follow.

When asked why she took her final bow with the band, Payne stated: “Our differences were more irreconcilable than artistic.”

Fifteen years later, Greta Van Fleet is disclosing for the first time publicly why her run with them came to an end…

Six scenes are laid out separately, taking place in six separate locations–one at a lakehouse in Michigan, two occurring in Tennessee—East Nashville, and Pigeon Forge—the fourth is a house in California, the fifth an office in Detroit, and, finally, a golf resort in Florida…

CONSTANCE LOBATTI (former manager): I worked closely with the band as they toured from 2017 to 2024. They were great fun to work with and had a very chaotic way about them, but they also tried to be respectful of management so they were easy to get along with. Well…the boys were pretty easy to get along with.

JOSH KISZKA (Vocals, Greta Van Fleet): Where’s my fucking camera? Oh, oh, yes I see now. I need to take these glasses off, anyway—I don’t want to come across too prestigious…is someone bringing me a beverage?

SAMUEL KISZKA (Bass, Greta Van Fleet): …So…we can say anything about each other, and nobody’s gonna sue for defamation? Can we confirm that?

DANIEL WAGNER (Drums, Greta Van Fleet): None of this screams “PR nightmare” at all.

JAKE KISZKA (Lead Guitar, Greta Van Fleet): This is kind of a loaded conversation to be having at 6:12 in the evening, isn’t it?

COLEY PAYNE (Rhythm Guitar, Greta Van Fleet): Whose idea was this, again?

[anthemofgvf]

Behind Closed Doors: Jake Kiszka x Reader Fanfiction

Part Seven

description: when your best friend asks for a favor, that being having his twin move in with you, you're hesitant. you've never really liked him, but you are struggling to meet your rent, so you oblige. who knew with time that you would become more upset with his presence, or upset with the fact you have underlying feelings for him that you don't want to face?

-the masterlist for this series-

trope: enemies to lovers x roommates au!

warnings for this series: alcohol and tobacco usage, explicit content (18+, minors dni), angst, swearing

word count: 6.2k

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

As soon as Jake shut the door behind him, you held your breath for a moment. You watched as the lock turned and clicked into place and listened to the mute sounds of his boots trotting off out of the apartment complex. You exhaled heavily, bracing yourself onto the counter with your hands on the edge of it, your back arched away from it, and your head held up to the ceiling. So much had happened in 15 minutes, and you were still trying to comprehend it.

He completely shed himself to you. The vulnerability of his heart and feelings were on full display for you only, and you felt relieved that he had felt the same way you did all along. You beat yourself up a bit for being so selfish towards him, malicious and cruel. But that was in the past now, and he had forgiven you with a kiss to signify his infatuation.

You went through your routine of getting ready for the day: eating, taking a shower, doing your makeup, and dressing up into your work uniform. Your emotions were conflicting; you wanted to smile and be happy about relieving some of the tension between you two. But he was gone now, and you had to wait two months to feel his touch again. To feel his lips crash into yours. To smell his natural musk. To be held in his arms. To simply be intimate with him.

It was an odd feeling that brewed in your stomach, making you feel empty where you should feel full. The equation of you two was solved yet put on pause temporarily. At least you knew it was because you already missed him, and not because you regretted kissing him.

As soon as you got into work, you looked for Stacie. You always made sure she was scheduled when you were (the perks of being a manager), and you were ready to update her on the news.

"Y/n!" She called for you from the back, running to you with open arms and squeezing you tightly.

You had taken some time off work to spend more time with Jake. Thankfully, your job believed your fake excuse of grieving a loss of a family member. It was half true, though; you were grieving the loss of Jake for a period of time while he was here. The inevitable you thought you were prepared for, yet you weren't.

You huffed out a laugh as she bounced with you in her arms, patting her back to let her know you appreciated the affection. She pulled away with a gleaming smile, but it began to fade once she noticed your loss of expression.

"What happened? What did Jake do to you?" She kept her hands on your back and searched for an answer by flicking between both of your eyes.

You sighed, laughing once more to yourself to contain your bitter sadness that wretched at your heart. "Oh, he didn't do anything to me. He just...left. Left for tour."

You gave her a nod, and her lips pursed into a pout.

"Not taking it well?" She cocked her head to the side, as her face softened into sympathy.

You exhaled quickly. With a shake of your head, you said, "not really."

You opened your mouth to speak again with hesitation. Of course, you wanted to tell her, but there was still a lot to process on your end.

"He, um, kissed me before he left. He poured out his feelings onto me in a ramble, and I told him how I felt, blah blah blah. And, then we kissed. I mean, it was passionate, meaningful- not something you'd think would happen when kissing him. I used to think he was so pretentious, vain - all of that self-centered shit. But the way he looked at me, the way he held me and told me how much he cared about me not only with words but with...a kiss. I'm still sitting with all of this, Stace." You said to her.

Her mouth hung agape. She stuttered for a few moments before being able to form a proper sentence. "D-did he just leave? Did this just happen, y/n?"

You nodded vigorously. "Yeah, like an hour or so ago. I didn't realize how us admitting our feelings for each other and then sealing it with a kiss would make him leaving for tour so much worse. I'm still in shock, frankly," you exhaled an airy laugh, "but I guess it just comes to show that you don't realize how much you're going to miss someone until they're gone."

You felt like you were being dramatic. As if you shouldn't have been missing him this much. You were able to call him, text him whenever you wanted to. He was going to return, but the time in between that seemed like it would be longer. Uncertainty of what would happen while he was gone, like if he'd hook up with any girls that came his way. He wasn't tied down to you, but it felt like he was fully committed to you by the way he spoke to you.

"I'm so sorry," she gave you another hug, rubbing your back and pulling away from you to continue her small speech, "I mean, at least he's coming back, right? He's not moving out or anything. It gives you something to look forward to when he comes back, right? You two getting to see each other after so long; it's going to be electric. And, hey, modern technology allows us to talk to those who are far away. Shoot him a text, maybe call him after work. I'm sure he misses your voice."

You nodded to her, running your hands over your hair and smoothing it out as you tied it into a high ponytail. "Yeah, I think I will. I've still got to tell Josh, who I'm sure has already heard from Jake, but I think it'd mean more to him that I told him. He loves gossip."

You both laughed at your words. Josh always loved insights on your love life, and an insight on your regular life itself. He cared about that kind of thing, and always wanted to make sure you were secure.

"Gonna tell him after work?" She asked you, walking away to the front to begin a day of work.

"Think so. Have to see what he's doing. He's working on a film right now, so his schedule has been a bit tight." You nodded to her. "But I might call Jake first. Guess we'll have to see which twin I talk to first, huh?"

"That's a sentence I never thought you would say." She laughed. "It's funny how things change. I remember you being so dead set on hating Jake for the time he lived with you. Now, it seems like you want him to live with you forever."

You pushed her shoulder with a laugh. "I can't believe I was so spiteful to him. I truly just needed to give him a second change and get over myself. Things work out for the best sometimes, huh?"

You remembered the conversation you and Jake had when driving to the party.

"Well, and then one day, when you make enough rockstar money, you'll move out into a huge mansion. Or, a humble home, whatever floats your boat, I suppose."

And you didn't process what he said until now.

"Kind of like having you as my roommate. Maybe I'll just live with you forever until you kick me out."

This was hitting you hard, like a collision head-on. You needed to work and focus on the one thing that would usually ease your mind from what your life was like outside of the coffee house.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

When you finished work for the day and arrived at home, you checked your phone to see a text message from Jake.

"Might have already eaten all the brownies. Don't worry, the other guys helped me out. Thank you for making them for me, I appreciate it. Hope work was okay, X."

You smiled at your phone, tugging at your bottom lip and feeling grateful for his text. Before you began to type, you looked down the hall from the kitchen where you stood and decided to go into his room. Sure, you had been in there before, but only when he had occupied it.

You shoved your phone into your pocket and saw the floors clear of his guitars. His closet was open, and half empty from his clothes. A lot of the jewelry he brought was gone, along with a multitude of shoes. It didn't feel like he lived here with you anymore, because his personality seemingly left the room.

You reached for your phone as you sat on his bed and texted him back.

"Glad you and the boys enjoyed the brownies. Work was good, but my mind was kind of everywhere. Call me when you can! I'd like to hear about tour life so far, although it's barely been a day." You responded back and shut off your phone. You looked around Jake's room once more, as it was making you depressed staying in the room that was too quiet for your liking and left to your bedroom.

You washed yourself free of the coffee house, changing into clothes suitable enough to wear outside in the bitter cold, as you planned to see Josh today. You had texted him earlier while you were on break to ask if he was free later tonight but had yet to receive a response. He wasn't a great texter, so whether he was busy or not, you were sure he'd just call instead to respond.

Silence used to soothe you. You used to adore a quiet apartment; a calm environment free of distractions. But when Jake had moved in, that original opinion was flipped around. You missed the faint sound of him playing guitar in his bedroom, humming to himself and pausing his playing to probably write a lyric down. The sounds of him shuffling around in his room. His footsteps that creeped to your room and would knock on your door to come bother you. Of course, you enjoyed his company now, but you wished you hadn't been so defensive of your space for as long as you were. So much missed time that you rid because of your hatred of him and trying to make up that time within a few weeks. It wasn't enough time, and you were just hoping that time would forgive you and allow you to be more comfortable with his absence.

Eventually, Josh called you and told you he would stop by to keep you some company later that night. You were grateful that the apartment wouldn't be so quiet anymore, and he was going to bring his big personality over to cheer you up. You hadn't told him what happened, nor did he tell you that he knew of anything, so whatever tonight would bring was a mystery to you.

To kill time, you cleaned your entire apartment. Wiping off the counters and cabinets, cleaning the bathrooms, dusting everywhere that you believed needed to be. You made the decision of playing Jake's EP while you cleaned, which helped you daydream that he was still there with you. You even let yourself close your eyes and imagine him playing in front of you, singing to you in a serenade manner.

You even reminisced on a memory that you two held while he was still here. You both were at your apartment in his room, sitting on his bed, and it did involve his guitar. He was playing you the song you heard him sing when you first saw him perform, which was "Wonderful Tonight" by Eric Clapton. Thinking on that fond memory now made you realize that the song had meaning. He was singing it for you, and the song was a translation of his feelings. God were you oblivious sometimes.

You clapped and howled after he finished the last chord, watching as his face became a hue of pink and wearing a bashful smile.

"Encore, encore!" You beamed.

"I'm a bit played out, sunshine." He said as he set his guitar down onto the bed behind the two of you.

You rolled your eyes. "Will you ever give that nickname a rest? It's corny, Jacob."

He bit back a smile. "Will you ever stop calling me Jacob?"

You raised your brows. Your lips downturned into a smile, sucking your cheek and shaking your head. "If you stop calling me sunshine, I'll stop using your government name. How's that?"

He nodded, holding his hand out. "That's a deal, y/n."

You grasped his hand with a giggle, shaking it and holding your hand in his for a moment. It was coarse, with his calloused fingertips caressing the back of your hand. How could rough hands feel so soft and welcoming?

You pulled your hand from his, setting it on your lap and looking to him. "You know, for someone who says they don't rehearse often, you sure like to play your guitar a lot."

"There's a difference between rehearsing and just playing to make sure you're keeping your skills up to date. Do you expect me not to play?" He said with a hint of a smile.

"Was just a bit confused, that's all." You shrugged. "How come you don't have a show here in Nash? I assumed you'd book a venue here for tour."

"We want to do a show here separately from tour. Like, a more intimate setting, you know? It's going to be far out from the tour, so fans can come see me if they please."

"Fans are traveling all around the world for you, huh? Got some groupies, Jake?"

He chuckled at your words. "I'm-no, no y/n," he continued his laughter, "I'm not the type to do that kind of stuff anymore. You grow out of it, I guess? I'm not a hormonal teenager anymore, believe it or not. Don't think that aspect of a rockstar life is for me. Sure, flirting is fun, but it's mainly harmless." He gave you a shrug.

"Does that mean if I become a fan, you'll flirt with me more than you used to?"

"Who knows. Guess you're just going to have to find out, huh?"

You took in a breath, pressing your lips together to contain a smile and giving him a nod. You felt your cheeks burn, running to your ears and creating a fire on the entirety of your face.

"I think I'm going to head to bed before you start something you can't finish." You pointed at him, standing up and walking to the door.

You turned to him and noticed his eyes lingering on you. You considered that he was watching you walk away. Maybe his eyes trailed to your ass in your tight sweatpants, but all you did was tell him "Goodnight" and put that thought at ease.

What shot you out of your daydream was your phone vibrating on the counter, and you turned swiftly to the device and picked it up.

"You on your way, Josh?" You said into the phone.

"Actually, I am here, y/n. Decided to drop by a bit early since we wrapped up on set faster than I expected. Mind letting me in?"

"Yeah, see you in a second." You said and hung up the phone.

You walked out of your apartment and opened the door to the complex for him, rushing him inside as you bounced up and down from the biting wind that nipped at your covered legs and face. He was sure to be quick inside, and you had a full body shiver as you closed the door.

He took off his coat and gestured it to you, but you pushed it away with a smile as you felt yourself warming up.

"Good to see you." He smiled at you, placing his hand on your back and rubbing it gently. "How's the day been treating you?"

"Did you hear from Jake?" You said to him.

You opened your door and let him walk in first, and he began to kick off his shoes and place his coat on the rack that sat by your door.

His lips were pressed together, and he gave you a shake of his head. "No, why? What happened?"

"Seriously? Does your brother tell you nothing these days?" You followed him into your living room and plopped onto the couch.

He sat down next to you, throwing one arm over the back of the couch and waiting for you to speak.

You sighed and tried to think of where to begin. "Well, I guess the major event of the day was that he admitted his feelings for me, and we kissed."

Josh's eyes lit up, and with a sharp gasp, he leaned in towards you with excitement. He blinked a few times in astonishment. For a moment, he couldn't formulate words. Usually, he was never speechless, but guess it could be because nothing has shocked him this much.

"I can't believe that fucker didn't tell me! Holy shit! How do you feel?" His words tumbled out of his mouth quickly.

You laughed at him. Composing yourself, you continued.

You told him about your excitement about it all, and the relief you felt. Then, you gave him the backstory of the lead up to the kiss, and he listened intently.

"You make him nervous? You're a special woman, y/n. Rarely does he ever get nervous. He's always been a confident guy. I knew he had feelings for you, but he never really dug into the root of it."

"You knew he had feelings for me, and you didn't tell me?" You yelled with a smile, swatting his arm and looking at him with a playful, stern glare.

"Y/n, I told you the moment you called me about him moving in. I told you he's always had feelings for you, and you said that all he wanted from you was one thing. You refused to believe me, so I let it take its course. Besides, it's not my place to get involved." He explained to you.

And he was right. He did in fact tell you that Jake had feelings for you before moved in and you were finalized on your decision. And he even predicted you turning your feelings around for him.

"He likes you, y'know."

"Well, I predict that your mind will change with time. Perhaps, you know, him moving in with you and the both of you creating a bond... It's a perfect story line, in my opinion."

"I am so fucking oblivious sometimes," you slapped your hand against your head, "but I guess I should thank you for not getting too involved. We worked things out on our own."

He nodded with a hum. "Well, have you talked to him? How are you taking the whole tour and him being gone?"

"We texted earlier, and I asked him to call me when he could. I assume he's busy, so I don't expect a call anytime soon. But I do miss him a lot. I guess the whole thing that happened today really just fucked with my head, in a good way, of course. I'm glad he didn't wait, because then I would've been left with overthinking about everything that has happened between us, you know?"

"I'm guessing you're not enjoying the quiet apartment, huh? Noticed you have Jake's EP on your record player." He nodded towards the open case, then flashing his eyes at the sleeve that laid on the coffee table in front of you two. "It's hard to be away from someone that you've grown so fond over, huh?"

"Yeah," you breathed, "I sort of feel like I miss him too much."

"I think your feelings are absolutely valid, y/n. I mean, he rambled a whole uncomposed monologue to you about how he felt, then left you with a kiss. That's kind of hard to just breeze through and not give much thought." He reached his hand to your shoulder and gave it a rub.

You nodded at him. You were unsure of what to say to him, so you averted your gaze and allowed that familiar silence to roam the air and consume the atmosphere. Only for this moment did you enjoy the silence, because it gave you a second to remember how Jake's lips felt on yours, and how he held you.

"Already feeling a bit lonely, huh?" Josh said to you.

You looked to him. "Is that bad?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "No, of course not. Do you want some company for the night? I know I'm not Jake, but we kind of resemble each other."

You gave him an affectionate smile as you huffed a soft laugh at him. "I would really appreciate that. You sure, though? Don't you have a lot of work to do?"

"I don't go on set until later in the day. Tomorrow is another night shoot, so I've got the day to kill. Let's just watch some movies until we pass out, yeah?" He asked.

"That sounds really fucking nice. I'll make some popcorn, and let you pick out the movies, Mr. Director." You poked at him.

"I have a few good movies in mind that I'm sure you haven't seen." He pointed at you with a wiggle of his brow, grabbing the remote off the coffee table and turning the TV on.

You stood up and walked into the pantry, finding a few packets of popcorn and grabbing a bowl from your cabinet. You set one of the packets into the microwave and let the kernels pop.

"Does this mean I'm going to be getting a personal commentary the whole time?" You said as you walked into the living room.

"Would this be a movie night with me if I didn't talk over the movie at least once?" He turned to you with a smirk.

You sat onto the couch and gave him a shrug. "I always assumed you would be absolutely mute during movies."

"Only certain ones. But some of the movies I have picked out for tonight need a bit of explanation of some kind. They twist at your mind." He pointed to his temple and tapped at it and began the first movie.

While the movie played, you made a few runs to the kitchen to finish popping the rest of the popcorn for you two and finally bringing a large bowl full of the buttery snack for you both to enjoy. You had it set on your lap and curled up next to Josh, as there wasn't any issue with physical contact between you two. Neither of you saw each other in a non-platonic light, as it's always been a great friendship where both of you were comfortable being close to each other. You were thankful to have a friend like Josh, and to know someone so caring.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

As the next movie played, Josh decided to be a bit quieter this time round and allow you to enjoy the movie. While it played, your phone rang in your pocket of your sweatpants, and you dug it out to see who was calling you. Of course, like you expected, it was Jake.

"Do you want me to pause the movie?" Josh asked you.

"No, keep watching it. I'll be back." You said, setting the near empty bowl of popcorn onto his lap and answering the call as you trotted off into your bedroom.

"Hi, Jake." You said to him as you closed your door behind you.

"Did you miss me?" He asked you.

"Back to your cocky self, huh?" You giggled with an eyeroll. You folded one arm over your body as you walked around your room.

"Was just making sure that you weren't too comfortable with my absence. In case you wanted to know, I miss you already."

You tugged at your lip. "I guess I miss you a little." You said playfully.

"Just a little? Didn't get that impression when you texted me to call you when I could."

You giggled. There was that old Jake, the one that you knew to be so confident in himself. It was good to know he was back to his old ways, but not in an annoyingly arrogant way. His nerves were soothed now that he knew you had feelings for him, too.

"Alright, so I miss you a good amount. Is that what you want to hear?"

There was a pause, but only for a moment. You heard him exhaled a staggered breath.

"Yeah, I do. Good to know you miss me, too."

There was a beat before he began to talk again.

"So, how's it going? Not getting too lonely, right?"

"Josh is over right now. We're watching a few movies, and he plans on staying over for the night." You sat yourself on the edge of your bed, throwing your legs onto the mattress and lying flat on your back.

"I'm glad he's keeping you company." He said to you.

"Did you guys get to the first stop yet?" You asked him.

"Yup. We made it to Indianapolis pretty late, so we're all in our hotel rooms right now. Kind of glad I don't have to sleep on the tour bus when we're not driving."

"Is the first show tomorrow? Are you excited?"

"Yeah, I am. It's kind of bizarre that there are people coming to see me perform, instead of seeing an opening act along with me. It feels good, like a confidence boost."

"As if you needed one." You huffed a laugh, to which he matched.

"It still feels nice!" He laughed. "But I do wish you were here with me. Sucks you have to work. Hopefully eventually you'll be able to come tour with me."

"I think I'd have to take a leave of absence to be able to do that, but hey, it's doable. Thinking about it now, it sounds fun. I'd get to travel for free while supporting you. It's a win-win." You said.

"You're just now thinking about me?"

"I've been thinking about you all day, Jake." You rolled your eyes with a smile. "You must really like hearing me talk about how much I miss you."

"Because I do. I wish you were here with me right now."

Your heart banged against your chest. The flirting that you had barely had time for when he was here was occurring now, and although you couldn't see his face, his voice was right into your ear. You squeezed and rubbed your legs tightly together, due to when he spoke, it was lustful. Frankly, both you and him knew that if he didn't have to leave, you two wouldn't have stopped kissing each other.

He continued. "You know that if I had more time with you before I left, or maybe just fessed up sooner, I would've made sure to savor our time together in a more intimate way." He spoke slowly.

"How so, Jake?" You said, pressing your thighs tightly together again to relieve some friction that you needed. You knew what he was insinuating, and you hoped he would continue.

"Fuck," he breathed, "are you sure I'm not taking time away from you? I know Josh is over."

"No, it's fine. I told him everything, so he's well aware that I'm going to be on the phone for a bit." You reassured him. You weren't going to end this phone call high and dry.

"Okay," he said, "well, for one, I want you to use your hands as a replacement of my own as I tell you what I want to do to you. What I am going to do to you the moment I see you again. Now, close your eyes for me, pretty girl."

You put your phone in the crook of your neck, leaning your phone into your ear and laying your hands on your stomach. You shut your eyes and imagined him there in front of you, as you figured that is why he asked you to do so. "Keep talking, Jake."

"I'd want to touch you everywhere, y/n. Not miss a spot on your body. Praise you, make you feel good. I'd trail my hand from the side of your face to your neck, dragging it down to your tits."

You followed his motions, using one hand to caress the side of your face, and drag it down to the cave of your breasts. You brought your other hand under your shirt, slowly creeping it up as he continued to speak.

"And of course, my mouth would explore your body, but" he chuckled, "for now, hands will do. I'd squeeze at your nipples and massage your tits."

You did as he said, exhaling a quiet sigh as you rolled your left nipple in your pointer and thumb, and massaging your other breast. You heard his choked breaths, assuming he was stroking himself, which turned you on more. You were saddened you couldn't see the sight unfold in front of you, but hearing every sound he uttered made up for it.

A long sigh was breathed into the phone on his end, which made you bite back a moan that bubbled in your throat.

"I'd then take your pants off." He said, and you quickly tugged them off and left them at your ankles with your underwear. You spit on your fingers in anticipation. "And I would be buried in between your thighs, licking at your clit."

You circled at the area, moaning into the phone quietly as a sign you were doing as he said. He groaned harshly, letting a few swears pass through his lips.

"Touching yourself like a good girl?" He asked you, even though he knew the answer.

"Yes, fuck." You whined into the phone. "Please, keep talking, Jake."

"God, I love talking you through this," he groaned, "just know I'm going to do all of this to you when I get home. Worship your fucking body, touch and kiss you everywhere I can. Make you feel so...fucking good, y/n."

You tugged at your lip, nervous that your moans would grow loud for Josh to hear. But you kept them quiet enough to be heard into the phone, and not echo onto the walls of your bedroom.

"While my tongue is on your pussy, I'd finger you slowly. Want this to last." He said to you. "Only one finger, though, babe. I'll tell you when you can add another, okay?"

You kept your fingers on your clit and managed to move your other hand around your other, sliding in one finger and curling it upon entrance. Your mouth opened as you felt your finger hit your sweet spot inside of your walls, and feel it effortlessly slide in and out of you. A high-pitched sigh escaped your lips, to which Jake groaned at.

"Keep making those pretty noises for me, y/n. And keep fingering yourself like the good girl you are."

You continued the motions, keeping true to his word and moving your finger slowly inside of you. You lazily circled your clit, as you didn't want to drive yourself to your orgasm just yet. Moans of ecstasy roamed into the phone, and they only continued to fumble out of your mouth when you heard him. If you listened closely, you could hear his hand sliding on his length at a steady pace and that had you wanting to throw your head back into the pillow.

"Go ahead and add a second finger for me and speed up your movements. You're doing so good for me, y/n."

You did as he demanded, and you bit down at your bottom lip with a whine.

"Fuck, Jake," you whimpered, "feels so fucking good."

"God, I wish I could see you right now," he sighed, "I'm sure you look so pretty touching yourself."

You let out a light giggle, grinding your hips into the motion of your fingers and leaving your mouth dropped open.

"I don't know how long I'm going to last like this, y/n. Go faster babe, I want you to cum with me."

Your eyes were squeezed shut as you let your fingers pump in and out of you and a merciless pace. Your movement on your clit had faltered, because you were so focused on your fingers hitting the one spot inside of you that was the key to your orgasm, and you began to feel the coil in your stomach tighten.

"Are you close, Jake? I'm so, so close." You whined breathlessly, making sure to keep your voice low for only his ears to hear.

"God, yes. I'm gonna cum, y/n. Keep talking to me. I love the sound of your fucking voice." He said, and it sounded like he said it with gritted teeth.

You were quick on your feet with what you would say to him. "Wanna feel you inside of me, Jake. I've waited so long for it and God do I want it badly." You moaned.

"So perfect for me, aren't you?" He said with a rushed tone. "Fuck, I'm cumming. Come on, y/n, cum with me." He said harshly.

You focused on your fingers and the sound of his choked breath as his release spewed out, and you felt your own overtake your body. A full body shiver entrapped you on your bed, with your back arching and your thighs trembling around your fingers. You held back a loud whine, closing your mouth and humming it behind your lips.

You caught your breath as you heard him catch his own, removing your fingers from yourself, putting your sweatpants and underwear back on, and getting up to clean off your hand and yourself. Your knees were slightly weak, so you were steady walking into your bathroom.

"Fuck, you okay?" He said breathlessly to you.

You closed the bathroom door and put him on speaker phone as you washed your hands. "Yeah, yeah I am. Don't think I've ever had phone sex before."

He huffed a laugh. "Glad I could be your first."

You smiled at your phone, cleaning yourself off and putting him back to your ear as you turned off the speaker button.

"I do miss you, you know. After all of this, I'd just want to be in bed next to you."

You rubbed your lips together and let another smile invade your lips. "I want that, too. Only two more months left." You said with a huff.

"It sounds longer than you think. I'm sure it'll fly by, and I'll be back before you know it."

"I sure hope so. It's barely been a day and I can't even imagine how I'm going to feel a week from now, let alone a month. But I'll get over myself. As long as you keep me updated and talk to me every now and then."

"I'll try talking to you as much as I can, y/n. Don't worry. But I should let you get back to your time with Josh, and I should catch some sleep. I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?"

You began walking to your door and let your hand rest on the handle. "Okay, sleep well. Goodnight, Jake."

"Goodnight, y/n." He said to you and hung up the phone.

You walked out slowly, and looked to see if Josh was awake. The bowl of popcorn was on the table, and his head was rolled back on the couch with his eyes closed. You laughed to yourself and grabbed a throw blanket from the side of the couch that you had abandoned throughout the movie night. You tucked yourself in next to him, throwing the cloth over you two, and resting your eyes.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

It had been almost two weeks since that day. You and Jake talked nearly every day, either before one of his shows, or while he was on the road. If you two weren't texting, he was calling you. You both even indulged in Facetiming each other, and it was nice to see his face after a while. You two had your fair share of phone sex once or twice, but neither of you wanted to make that a main priority. You both wanted to make sure that what you had wasn't about lust, but heartfelt feelings and pure romance.

It helped that you talked to him a lot, and although you still missed him, it helped to hear his voice and see his face. He showed you some pictures from the places he traveled, different sights that he had been to and some photos of the venues he got to perform in. Sure, they were small, but he told you they were nearly packed every night. You believed him and were also beyond proud of his accomplishments.

Now, all you had left to do was wait for his return. Sure, that's what you've been doing, but after two days, it really set in that you'd have to wait longer to see him in person again. You figured long distance would be hard, but thankfully, it wasn't too difficult. You were just thankful that he was returning home to you, and not to anyone else.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

-part eight-

series taglist: @jakekiszkasmommy @anythingforjtk @gold-mines-melting @twistedmelodies @ageofhearingloss @classicsneverdie @lmaooharry @raviolilegs @mydarlingdanny @iheartjakekiszka @edtvdf @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @gvf23 @flo-gvf @madneedshelp @carlyfleet @pinkunicornsandbluecows @joshysgirl @jasminesworldd @alwaysonthemend @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface @takenbythemadness @jaketlove @starcatcher-jake @hi-hi-hello11 @amygvf13 @alyson814 @char289 @becinabubblegvf @worldsgayestbonenerd @intoth3ether @m0uthfl13s @klarxtr

other tags: @songbirds-sweet @sacredjake @mountain-in-springtime @ignite-my-fire @gvfsstardust @jakesguitarsolo @fallonfatality @digitalcalamity @demolitionndann @lipstickitty @lexii-nv-c @joopsworld @gvfpal @hellowgoodbye @writingcold @loverleaverslayerbeliever @stardustcatcher @absolutely--mental @hippievanfleet @haileygvf @gretasfallingsky @dont-go-home-without-me @beckahvanfleet @threadthatssacred @indigofallingsky @audgeppp @sinarainbows @brujamagik @bowievanfleet @sam-i-am-20 @laneygvf @psychedelicsprinkles @malany-gvf @idontlikelizards @josh-iamyour-mama @julihurrr @starshine-wagner @lyndz2names @jaketswine @jjwasneverhere @interstellar-shores

[moonlightisdancing]

Grá Rúnda/ j.t.k

Pairing: au!Jake Kiszka x f!Reader

Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: NSFW 18+ MINORS DNI themes of physical abuse/harm, blood, use of guillotine, betrayal

as always if a warning’s forgotten lmk!

masterlist

a/n: thank you for reading! comment to be added to the tag list for this fic 🫶🏻 (also sorry this is late and kinda short… a lot’s been happening😬)

»»———-　x　———-««

Watching the arrow enter Jacob’s thigh pierced your heart in the same manner. It hurt to breathe knowing he was struggling to himself. All you could manage between guttural sobs was crying his name in a poor attempt to save him. You reached your hand towards him and tried to run to his aid as your father’s men attempted to hold you back. You thrashed around until their grips loosened, running to Jacob’s side. Though nowhere near as warm as he usually is, he was still warm nonetheless, granted he was unresponsive. You held his head in your lap, cradling his face with your nimble fingers.

“Please, Jacob,” You whispered before placing a trail of kisses across his forehead. His skin was damp with a thin sheen of cool sweat, his tan complexion slowly fading. “No, no, no… No, Jacob, please?”

A brute man stood before you, grabbing you by the arm and pulling you to your feet. You watch Jacob’s head thump into the ground beneath him, his chocolate locks flying through the air and sticking to his skin. His eyes scrunched in pain and a small groan came from him.

“H-he cannot die. Please? Please do not let him die,” You pleaded, tears pouring down your face.

“Don’t worry, Princess Y/n, we won’t kill him. Your father will get that pleasure. Although after all he’s done to you, I’d like to end him myself.”

The men roughly picked Jacob up, the whine leaving his lips being your only hope of his survival. You hated that he was in pain. All you wanted was to nurture him, hold him in your warmth and tell him he’d be okay. For now you’d have to devise a plan regarding his survival. Jacob was a prince who was simply trying to protect your family and kingdom. Your eyes darted through the crowd, watching as the men tossed Jacob on top a stead. Your attention remained on him as he was carried away until you were guided into a carriage where you could no longer see.

Inside sat Eira, biting the sides of her fingers as she shook. Her eyes widened as you simply stared back, forcing an apologetic smile to be polite. Eira was quick to wrap her arms around your torso, not so subtly gagging when she did.

“What did that monster do to you?” She scoffed, shaking her head as she guided you to sit beside her. A large portion of the ride lacked conversation, only the buzzing summer heat and clacking hooves filling the space. Eira’s hand grabbed yours and she squeezed as she mumbled prayers, asking for guidance and answers.

Upon arriving at the castle, Eira led you to your room where lower ranked servants had lugged in a large tub. They took time hauling in buckets of water and heating them over the fire for a bath. Eira waved off the others as she poured herbs and soaps into the water. The light crackle of the fire reminded you of Jacob and all of the special moments you’d shared in such a short period of time. A faint memory of his lips against your skin passed as you tried to grasp onto the feeling. Eira walked towards you and began plucking the stray leaves and twigs from your hair before aiding you in removing your gown. Her eyes widened as the satin fabric rose over your breasts.

“Princess,” Eira’s voice cracked as she ran her thumb over your collarbone. “What did he do?”

You had forgotten that Jacob’s lips against your skin resulted in bright pink marks that had turned blue and purple. The marks trailed from your hips to just under your ear. Without speaking, Eira knew, but she would assume the worst.

“Eira,” You spoke quietly, placing your hand on hers before grabbing it. “I promise Jacob did not hurt me. He wouldn’t do that.”

Regardless of her subtle nod, you knew she still believed otherwise. She was careful as she washed your body. Your eyes settled on the water around you, watching as it quickly grew dirty, catching a glimpse of the marks left behind. Silence was becoming the new normal between you and Eira, and as much as you hated that, it was well needed. Eira’s nimble fingers working through your messy hair provided you ample relaxation to think. Jacob’s survival was of utmost importance to you. Finding him would not be the hard part, but getting to him would be. Without a doubt the guards would be on high alert, especially after recent events. Eira rinsed your hair and finally broke her silence, pulling you from your thoughts.

“What have you gotten yourself into, my dear?” Eira clicked her tongue as she wrung your hair out.

“I love him, Eira.”

“You love him? Y/n, you put not only that boy’s life at risk, but yours. And he’s-”

“Do not, Eira. He will not die.” You warned, grasping the edges of the tub with your soapy palms, lifting yourself out of the water.

“He has made his bed, he will lay in it.”

“Jacob was trying to save me! For once someone cared and-”

Before you registered Eira’s hand in the air, it came wailing across your cheek, kissing your skin bright pink. Seeing as she was like a second mother, it was no surprise she disciplined you for talking to her that way.

“Save you? You run off with a dirty bard for two days and you come back like this? Best you remember your manners, princess.” Eira tossed a towel at you before storming out of your room. You wanted to cry, but crying would not solve anything. Instead you’d use the anger to fuel your search for Jacob.

Once the moon sat high in the midnight sky, you dampened a scrap square of cloth and crept out of your room. Knowing the state Jacob was taken away in, the least you could do was clean him. To your surprise, no guards were standing outside or at either end of the hallway. It wasn’t long after you’d made way down the hall before you were approached by guards, although it did take longer than you anticipated.

“Where do you think you’re going, Princess Y/n?”

“I don’t think that’s your concern.” You shoot back, folding your arms over your chest.

“It is our duty to-”

“To protect me, yes. I’ll have you know I am not in danger.”

“We cannot let you go any further.”

“Oh, no? Well, I’m sure the king would be elated to hear you’re finally doing your jobs after failing the day I went missing.”

They didn’t dare comment back, instead letting their heads fall between their shoulders. You were surprised after failing the king once that the two of them were still allowed to live. The guard on the left raised his head and hand at the same time, pointing to the hall adjacent to him.

“He is down that way.” The guard murmured before quickly returning his hand to his side. You nod and walk down the dimly lit hall. It reeked of all sorts in more ways you could pinpoint. Sorrow with a hint of anticipation coated the walls, pairing awfully with the old brick and rich copper scent. Though the light was low you were still able to see Jacob curled into a ball, resting in the corner of his cell. For the first time since you’ve known him, you’d say he truly looked awful. His beautiful brown hair was a knotted mess at the nape of his neck, his bottom lip swollen along with his blackened right eye. A blood stained streak trickled down from his nose between his lips and the poorly tended wound on his thigh. It was a surprise that Jacob was still alive considering his current state. You walked towards his chamber, and while evidently lethargic, Jacob was still attentive to his surroundings.

“Please,” Jacob whined weakly, his voice trembling in fear. “Please don’t hurt me again.” His frail body shivered against the solid floor, the chains clattering against the brick as he shook.

“Jacob, it’s me.” You whispered as you lowered yourself to your knees, grasping the steel bars with your hands. He shifted enough to look at you with his good eye, wincing in pain as he held his ribs. Jacob slowly, but surely, inched his way closer to the bars that separated your two bodies. Regardless of how beat up and mangey he looked, you still had an innate desire to kiss and hold him. He rests his head between the bars, you do the same allowing your temples to touch. Jacob reached his hand through the small gap and placed his hand on your knee, gently rubbing his thumb over the fabric of your gown.

“I don’t know what will happen to me. I have loved and lost in my lifetime, I cannot lose you.” He sighed, adjusting his head to kiss the side of yours.

“I’m not sure, but I will not let you die, Jacob.” You pulled away, bringing the damp cloth to his mouth. The water from the rag rehydrated the blood crusted to his plush lips. Jacob’s eyes screwed shut in pain and he hissed with every swipe of the cloth, but he didn’t stop you from cleaning him up. Once his lips and nose were blood free, you placed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. Next you gently worked your fingers through his hair to untangle his locks as best you could.

“There you are. There’s my pretty boy.” You massaged his scalp with your fingers, bringing your temples together again. If it weren’t for the godforsaken steel bars, you’d wrap him entirely in your comfort.

“Why are you helping me?”

“Because I love you, and I wa-” A newfound light source filling in the space around you made your stomach become a pit. Jacob scurried away from the bars in response to the heavy footsteps coming in close behind you.

“Y/n.” Your father’s voice boomed loudly against the brick, creating an awful ring in your ears.

“Father, I-I was just-”

“Just disobeying the rules yet again, child. Have you learned nothing from your actions?” The king grabs your arm, pressing his fingers into the marks left by Jacob the day before. Even if you found the words to say, nothing you could would change your father’s mind. In his eyes, and everyone else’s, Jacob was your captor, and for that he deserved to be punished.

Your father dragged you to your room that was now well guarded. The tub still sat in the middle of the room, half full of dirty water, twigs and leaves dancing about. He threw you to your bed before demanding you sit up and look at him. Anger painted every inch of his face, as if he were more mad about you talking to Jacob than he was about you running away.

“He is dangerous, Y/n. You cannot help every injured bird that falls in your palms.”

“Jacob is harmless! He was-”

“Y/n,” The king spoke sternly, reaching his hand toward your face. He pushed your hair behind your shoulder, inspecting the marks across your neck. “Look what he did to you. He hurt you, and for that he will pay.”

“He did not hurt me! He came to save me, to save us, and our kingdom.” Your words were cut short with a scoff as the king walked out of your room, clicking his tongue. Surely nothing could get Jacob out of this mess, but you’d be damned if you didn’t try.

Laying in bed felt wrong without Jacob wrapped around you. You stared at the ceiling praying for sleep or simply death. A life without Jacob was not a life worth living, in your opinion. The thought of the punishments he’d continue to endure over the course of the night haunted you. Your beautiful boy, your prince, being beaten beyond recognition shattered you. You swore you could hear him wailing from the end of the corridor, his cries echoing through your head.

You did not sleep, instead you sat at the edge of your bed with Jacob’s guitar in your lap, aimlessly plucking the strings. Every strum sounded absolutely awful, your fingers aching nearly as much as your heart. While you couldn’t play a single coherent song, the mindless strumming allowed you to think. It soothed you in a way, although had the guitar been in Jacob’s lap, you’d have felt more calm. The sun came up, and still you had no idea how to help Jacob. You opened your window, realizing for the first morning in years you hadn’t watched the sunrise. The moon was gone and the sky was a shade of blue that reminded you of the morning birds, the ones who sang perfectly with Jacob’s mandolin each morning. You look across the vast forest, only now being able to know what you were looking at. The smoke still rose from Dinaria, the sweet scent still lingering in the air. You heard horns being blown, if it weren’t for the faintness you’d presume from your own time square. But this sounded like it was traveling from a distance.

An uneasy feeling washed over your body.

It all began piecing together. King Kenric was waiting for a large attendance of people before attacking. Today’s executions would be the proper excuse to do so. Would King Kenric play it off as his son being wrongly executed? Would he simply continue ignoring the existence of Jacob? You would be devastated not only if Jacob lost his life, but innocent people of your kingdom as well. You have to tell your father, even if it’s the last thing you do.

A knock at your door signaled it was time to leave. You flattened the front of your gown with your palms before turning on your heels and opening your door. There stood your father and two guards, ready to escort you to the town square. Sorrow seeped deep to your bones as you knew what you’d bear witness to. The loss of Jacob would mean the loss of you, for he was so engraved in your existence nobody would understand you without at least hearing his name. You were the only one not cheerful as you were loaded into the carriage and brought to the town square. Upon arrival, seeing Jacob next in line with shackles around each limb tore you apart. This was your fault, and he had to pay for it.

Town Square

The only thing more embarrassing than the shackles around your ankles was the limp accompanying them. Even worse than that was how you looked. Y/n tried cleaning you up, but as soon as she left all her hard work had been undone. You were honestly surprised you could even move after the number of times your sides were kicked throughout the night. The pain of losing her was worse than the pain you felt, while your physical body was nearly beaten beyond repair, your heart had felt worse. Saving her had become your only goal, falling in love wasn’t your intention, the stars simply aligned.

Looking out amongst the crowd of townsfolk, you were grateful not to recognize any of their faces. It helped wash away a fraction of the humility. There was one man before you, only tightening the knot in your stomach. In theory, death by guillotine would be quick, but to watch someone knowing that would be you next, provided no reassurance.

The crowd knew this man. Directly in front stood a woman cradling a crying baby, a little girl no older than three beside her. The toddler sucked the thumb of one hand while the other tugged the side of her mother’s apron. The thought of a young child watching the public execution of its own father made your skin crawl. The man was placed face down with his stomach pressed against a long, narrow bench, his head locked between two wooden planks above a bucket as he kicked his legs.

The blade came down and severed his neck in a matter of seconds, his blood spraying across the faces of those in the front of the crowd. The faces of his loved ones. A guard reached his hand into the bucket, grabbing the man’s severed head by a clump of his hair. Majority of the crowd grew sickly in color. His head was flung around as if it were a trophy, the other guards cheering each time the head was displayed. The man’s eyes moved, making your skin crawl as they locked with yours.

The townsfolk had nearly no time to recoup before you were being dragged to the guillotine. You too were put in the same compromising position as the man prior, except you didn’t try to fight the inevitable. Laying down on broken ribs hurt nearly as much as the gaping wound on your thigh pressed against the splintering wood. They left you there for what felt like an eternity, the crowd filling in more and more.

Let that be a price I pay.

This price was more than you bargained for, but you’d rather lose your life than to live without Y/n. You had nothing left to live for after losing your title and now the woman you loved. Praying wouldn’t save you, but maybe it could protect her. You mumbled words that would hopefully find Princess Y/n through whatever higher power existed in the universe.

“Jacob Kiszka of Dinaria has been found guilty of kidnapping, amongst other things, of our beloved Princess Y/n. Today he will pay the ultimate price for his crimes.” You couldn’t see the man who spoke, but you recognized his voice. The king who spent the better half of his night beating you nearly to death would be the one to finish the job. Gentle weeping from behind made you aware that Y/n was in attendance as well. This was it, every choice led you here. You came all this way and still couldn’t save her.

You scanned the crowd on the off chance you’d recognize a single pair of eyes. There he stood towards the back. The dark, angry eyes of your father pierced you to the core. Of course he’d be present to watch the demise of who he deemed his greatest enemy. Footsteps made their way behind you as the crowd grew loud. Just when you thought it would finally end, a grin tugged the corners of your father’s lips. You watched as he gestured with his hand a sort of signal to someone. It was only then you realized he hadn’t shown up for you, but instead to progress with his plan to take over Novaria. Before you could warn anyone, you watched bodies begin to fall.

“Y/n!” Unsure of what else to do, you screamed for Y/n, her name being the only thought you could manage.

“She cannot save you, scoundrel. What’s done is-”

“Y/n, Kenric, in the back, it’s happening.” You whined, hoping anyone cared to listen.

Everything grew rapidly silent as the king made his way to the front before demanding his people to run. Running wouldn’t stop what was to come, but maybe it would save a fraction of Novaria’s people. Y/n went to her father’s side and stood on her toes to whisper something in his ear, pointing to you occasionally. It was then that the guards freed you from the restraints and escorted you alongside King Emyr and Princess Y/n. You weren’t sure where they’d put you, even if it was back in that musty cell, at least Y/n would be safe for now.

You were not allowed to ride with Y/n, instead being thrown in the back of a carriage where you could not see. She spent the duration of the journey whispering and pleasing to her father all too quiet for you to make out.

The Castle

A more than awkward silence filled the space of your throne room. Y/n sat beside you as Jacob was held up by guards in front of you both. He couldn’t stand on his own, that was no fault but yours. After the information Y/n fed you in the carriage you had to put your pride aside and apologize. Apologizing was not something you did, as the king you’re simply never wrong. The words finally found you as you waved off the guards, requesting they gently lowered Jacob to the floor.

“Prince Jacob,” You began slowly, watching his face contort at the name. “Had I known your status as such, perhaps our encounters would have been different. It was never my intention to hurt another member of royalty, simply to protect my daughter. I hope you understand that.”

“I’m sorry, your highness.”

“Please, do not apologize. I understand now we both have had that intention from the start, and it is imperative I know everything you do in order to do so.”

Jacob began explaining everything from overhearing King Kenric’s plan and losing his title to being shot in the leg and the loss of his mare. This boy truly risked it all for the sake of your daughter and your people. His own father would stop at nothing to expand their kingdom, even if it meant losing his only son.

“So tell me then, Jacob. How did they replace you at the castle?” You leaned forward in your throne, Y/n standing up to sit beside Jacob. You watched as she grabbed his hand and gave it a gentle, reassuring squeeze.

“We switched places, m-my cousin and I. The bard is my uncle, he left the royal family at a young age. Something about their values not aligning with his or something.” Jacob’s words became slurred together, if you had to assume it was from his physical state. You called in a handful of servants.

“Give this young man a proper bath, and bring fine linens for him.” You demanded. “I will need your help to save our kingdoms, Jacob.”

“I would do anything for my people, for Y/n’s, too.”

“Then it is decided.” You say, pushing yourself up from your throne. Jacob cowered in fear as if you were to hit him again, his head resting on Y/n’s shoulder. “We will return you to your people and your throne.”

»»———-　 　———-««

taglist: @literal-dead-leaf @edgingthedarkness @jenniferkiszka

[greta-van-chaos]

I Will Possess Your Heart // Part 4

Oliver Reed x Reader

Part 3 < > Part 5 (wip)

Warnings |  Explicit sexual content, oral (m recieving), cursing

Word Count | 3.6k

Authors Note | I take a lot of breaks, I think you guys have caught onto that by now. I don't want to sit here and be like i'm really busy guys, sorry but truly i'm just so busy and my heart hasn't been in writing at all. I want that to change but I can't make any promises. For now, as a peace offering, here is the next part to I Will Possess Your Heart and hopefully the fifth and final part will be releasing very soon after.

The morning slides into the afternoon and the afternoon slides into the night and before you know it, once again you are beneath the covers of Oliver's bed, ear pressed to his chest as you listen to the slow, content beating of his heart. Although he denied his tiredness he has fallen into an easy sleep with you beside him and though anxiety pools in your stomach you refuse to deprive him of the sleep he seems to need so desperately.

You know you should leave, you can't stop thinking about it. Who in their right mind seeks a stranger out in the dead of night due to car troubles and then let's him entertain them for a weekend with sex and booze? It wasn't a normal situation and the guilt was truly getting to you.

For now, you decided, you'd sleep. At this point in the evening there wasn't much for you to do in terms of relieving Oliver of your presence and you weren't even sure he'd want you to go when the time came. So, sleep. It was a problem for future you to sort out.

~

And so, morning came, much faster than you'd have preferred but seeing Oliver still sound asleep, face beautifully calm in the morning light you knew it was time to go.

Reasonably, there is no way, no way at all that you have fallen so deeply for a stranger. You've known him for two days and already you felt an attachment that makes you shiver when you begin to even think of severing it.

Finally, you rise, peeling yourself carefully away from the bed and assuring that Oliver says sound asleep. Before leaving the room though, you move to stand on his side of the bed so you can brush a kiss to his hairline. You feel bad about what you're going to do but you know that if he woke and asked you to stay again, you may not be able to bring yourself to say no.

Once down the stairs, stepping as carefully as you can so as not to make much noise, you begin searching for your phone. You expect not to find it without a fight but there it is, perched on top of your now cleaned and dried clothes that lay folded on Oliver's desk in the living room. Miraculously it still has a charge to it and in an even greater leap of luck you now have cell reception.

Without thinking to hard on the money you're able to set up a tow truck and a ride back into the city where you reside, all things able to be neatly wrapped up before dinner time this evening.

You'd really feel unforgivable if you didn't leave something for Oliver, some sign of life, maybe an apology letter. After a small bit of deliberation you decide to scrawl your number on the legal pad you find at his desk and a short note. You don't feel the need to say much as you really aren't certain of your feelings yet but still, you make sure it's something substantial enough not to leave him with hard feelings.

With that, you gather your belongings, opting to keep the clothes he's lent you and call a car. Not a single sound alerts you that Oliver has stirred awake and for that you are grateful. You'd rather be out and gone without a word, like some specter or ghost, unseen.

The car pulls up within a timeframe you're certain is impossible considering how far out and into the woods you are. Once situated you take one more look at the manor house before your driver pulls away. You swear that in one of the windows on the top floor you can feel Oliver's form, standing, stoic. It takes all of your willpower to turn your cheek and leave without a single whisper of a goodbye.

You're doing what needs to be done. You can't live in a fantasy with a man you barely know. You hope he calls, of course you do but you know it's better for both of you if you're rid of the house now rather than later.

~

Days went by, days and days and days until the days faded to weeks and now, it's been almost three months since you left Oliver's glamourous home. Almost three months since you scrawled your phone number on a notepad atop his desk. Almost three months without a single call. Almost three months since you were forced into the realization that you won't ever be seeing him again.

Huffing you curl your body sideways, allowing your forehead to rest on the chilly glass of the train car you're sitting in. The world moves by in a blur and as you watch you wish the endless slew of city lights would swallow you whole. Ever since you left his house that night, you'd felt empty which almost made you laugh considering you had nothing to build upon apart from the strange situation you had found yourselves in and incredible sex.

An automated bell dings and your stop is called out by a voice that is equally as artificial. Gathering your bag and pulling your coat on a bit tighter you stand to leave. As you approach the doors, which are very slowly hauling themselves open you're robbed of all breathe.

With a dull thud your purse hits the floor, "Oliver?"

His eyes are tired and dim but when he hears your voice they seem to open wider and brighten. "Y/n?"

None other than Oliver Reed is standing at the very end of the train car, following a short line of people to exit the vehicle. The world stops around you and the overwhelming rush of emotions that grasps you keeps you glued to the spot. Hardly aware of people pushing past you to get off the train you take in Oliver's appearance and your heart aches. He's wearing a vest similar to the one he shrugged off after inviting you into his house on that fateful night and a pair of slacks. His hair is neatly brushed unlike the tangled tresses you were so used to. Even as the sky donned the night like a silky, starlit nightgown he wore a pair of oddly cut sunglasses that somehow looked perfect on him but would make anyone else look ridiculous.

Finally your brain catches up and before you realize you're doing it you rush towards him, belongings forgotten on the floor. You stop right in front of him, mere inches away from touching, your hands folded together at your chest, "I never thought I'd see you again."

He huffs out a breath and reaches for you, placing a hand on your cheek. "Neither did I."

As though you've been forced back into your body and made to see out of your eyes you blink away the haze of excitement just enough to remember that you're supposed to be exiting the train. He makes a noise of affirmation when you turn to get your bag and grab his hand, pulling him off the train and into a tight embrace once you're steady on your feet. Both of your hearts are beating fast and hard, as if to escape their confines and meld together, two halves finally whole. Oliver holds you against him and now that you're back in his arms you never want to leave. The cold outside does it's best to chill your exposed skin but the warmth of the man in front of you helps quell the bite.

When he pulls away you step back, blurting out the one thing you couldn't stop thinking about, "You never called."

"I didn't know what to say but--" He sighs and looks at you, forlorn "--please believe me when I tell you that I wanted to. I think I was just... confused."

"I do, I swear. I just wish that you did. I--" You pull yourself into his chest again, pressing your face into the crook of his neck to bite back your words, not ready to fully realize how deep your feelings run. "God, I missed you."

He smells the same as before, warm, sweet and slightly alcoholic. "I've missed you too, love."

You break away for a moment and just stare into each others eyes, the train leaving the station a blurry background noise to your occupied brain. The entire world around you has dimmed and all you know is Oliver, all you feel is Oliver, all you want is Oliver. Without really thinking you thread your fingers through his hair and pull his lips to yours, smiling at the softness of his mouth moving in sync with your own.

When his hands move to your hips and pull you flush against him you smile against his mouth and he hums. It feels perfect.

All of the questions, the worry, the unanswered want, they're all melting away and making room for this moment. You never thought you'd be reunited and now that you are it's sweeter than you could have ever imagined.

"Let me buy you dinner," He mumbles, words muffled against your lips.

"Please."

~

You both walk in silence, the streetlights illuminating the rain speckled road. Apparently Oliver is in town for a movie audition and plans to be around for a few days, the thought that you'll have him nearby for the weekend puts an immovable smile on your lips.

Hand in hand you make your way to a small pub and as soon as you enter you're warmed from the crown of your head to your toes. The lighting is dim and the bar is crowded with people but somehow you're able to find a little booth tucked away in the back. Everything is falling into place as if this moment is destiny. You truly believe that to be so.

Once you've ordered drinks, Oliver places his chin in his hand and gazes upon you with nothing but pure bliss and adoration in his eyes. "It's so fucking good to see you, love. I never thought I'd be able to again."

You look up at him through your lashes and smile bashfully, "I never thought I would either." You still can't shake the hurt of knowing that he was fully capable of contacting you the whole time but chose not to. Clearing your throat you lock eyes with him and press again, "I still don't really understand why you didn't call."

He sighs and looks to the side, avoiding the almost accusatory expression on your face. "I just... I was upset and confused and I really thought that your number may have just been a courtesy. I didn't know if you actually felt the same." The pained look on his face makes you reach out for his hands. You take them in your own and rub circles into the backs of them with your thumbs. His instinct at first is to pull away but quickly he melts into it and lets out a deep breath through his nose.

"I'm sorry."

Completely shattering in the moment the waiter walks over and places your drinks down. Oliver nods his head at the boy and then looks back to you. "So, do you come here often?"

A dumb grin pulls on your lips and you laugh. "I do, in fact. I live just down the street." You cock an eyebrow at him "What brings Oliver Reed to this neck of the woods?"

He looks surprised for a moment before you can see on his face that he realizes he hasn't explained his presence in your city. "I've got brunch with a director tomorrow, I was coming in tonight to stay and get my bearings before we met."

"Funny coincidence that you end up so close to me," you laugh, truly just so happy to be in his presence.

"You've got that right, love. What a surprise to see you on the same train as me, I thought I was hallucinating until you came right up and I could touch you."

"Well, I'm real and I'm right here and I am just as surprised as you."

You both sit in silence for a moment, just staring, taking each other in. What a situation you have found yourselves in, to being on the same train and now to knowing that Oliver will be staying a night in the place you've lived your whole life.

"What do you say we head back to mine after dinner?" You ask without thinking "You could even stay with me for the night if you want. Though I'm sure if you've booked a hotel you'd better stay there..." You trail off, slowly getting quieter and mumbling throughout the sentence but he shakes his head.

"How could I ever say no to you, darling. Let me worry about the hotel and I'll let you worry about leading the way." Letting go of one of your hands that you didn't realize he'd been holding he reaches to sip his drink. Taking the opportunity you run the toe of your shoe up his leg, you hope the gesture is sexy and not awkward. Guessing by the way his eyes darken and how he sets down his glass, you had the effect you were going for. Something about him makes you so much more playful and daring than usual. "I think I might take you up on that sooner than I had anticipated."

"Patience, Oliver, patience." You send him a flirty wink and he just smirks, a million plans of what he could do to you seemingly flashing behind his eyes.

"I'll show you fucking patience doll, just you wait." The look in his eyes has your pressing your thighs together.

You spend the rest of the night drinking and laughing and shamelessly flirting. It feels so natural and now that you've fallen into a rhythm with him you don't want it to stop.

You cash out and leave quicker than you'd anticipated, dragging him down the street. You truly do only live a couple blocks away and in this situation that is more than perfect. You're both itching to get inside.

The whole walk you're both giggling like teenagers and Oliver can't keep his hands off of you, the entire time his arm is firmly planted around your waist, effectively keeping you pressed into his side.

"This is my building, right here" You say, fishing out your keys as you walk up the steps and approach the door. Once unlocked you lead Oliver by the hand to the elevator.

Almost immediately the doors open and as soon as you step in Oliver is on you, pinning you to the wall and kissing your neck. He presses his leg between yours and grips your chin so he can give himself all the room he needs to suck and lick and kiss at your throat. You giggle and pull him off of you just enough to haphazardly throw your hand to the panel of buttons on the wall and hit your floor, all the while his hands are trailing down your top until he can slip them under your shirt and cup your breasts.

"So impatient" You breathe, the words holding the same cadence as a soft moan. Despite your words you thread your hands into his hair to pull him back and grind down on his thigh.

"Seems like you're the impatient one, you and your needy little pussy" He practically growls.

You can feel your cheeks get hot and when he looks down at you you almost melt. Every time your eyes meet it feels like an electric shock.

"I think you like it." You whisper, guiding his mouth to yours by a soft hand under his chin. He releases a content sigh when your lips meet, almost melting completely at having you this close again.

"Oh yeah? and what makes you think that?" His voices is taunting and his breath is warm against you cheek as he breaks the kiss to speak.

Instead of using words you slide the hand that isn't holding his face between your bodies, palming him through his pants. Usually it's him that does the smirking but right now you have the most smug look on your face and he does nothing to challenge it and regain control. A whimper-like sound shakes out of him and he leans into your touch, starting to press his hips harder into your hand as you rub your hand against him faster.

The elevator doors opening makes you both freeze, your bodies eerily still. He rests his forehead against yours and sighs. You're reluctant to break apart but force yourself to in favor of being able to indulge in the privacy of your apartment.

Once again, Oliver's hands refuse to leave your body and when you get to your door he presses himself against your ass, letting you know just how hard he is... as if you weren't already aware. "When that door opens... I'm going to ruin you" He murmurs into your hair.

"Oh I'm counting on it" You throw back, pushing the door open and stepping inside. Instantly following through on his threat he slams the door closed and spins you around, starting to unbutton your blouse. You might have assumed that he'd already been in your apartment by the way he walks you back to the couch without hesitation but you have a feeling that if there was no couch to run into he would've kept walking you back until you ran into something else. He just got lucky, apparently.

When the backs of your knees hit the arm you're almost forced to sit down which brings you level to his belt. You slide back so you can kneel on the couch and then pull him closer by said belt. He abandons any attempt at removing your shirt when he sees you unbuckle it and claw his pants down. You've waited for too long for this, you're not gonna waste any time with pleasantries.

As soon as he is no longer confined to the sleek black boxers beneath his slacks you put your mouth on him. First by flattening your tongue and dragging it along the underside of his cock, then by taking him fully into your mouth. He throws his hips forward at the feeling and hits the back of your throat. You recover quickly and hum around him, bringing one hand up to rest on his stomach.

"My god, you look so fucking hot like this" He mumbles, starting to guide your movements with the hands he's anchored in your hair.

Even after the short amount of time you spent with him you're relishing in everything that is Oliver. You missed it so... the feel of him, the weight of him on your tongue, his moans and breaths and the way his fingers feel dancing over your cheekbones to coax himself further down your throat. He's got you in a trance and you wouldn't have it any other way.

You tenderly rub your thumb over his hipbone, a far more gentle and loving action compared to the way you're lavishing him with your mouth. His hips stutter and you can assume he's already close by how desperate his thrusts have become. At this point he's controlling everything, holding your head in place and guiding himself in and out of your mouth at whatever speed he pleases. You don't mind one bit.

He lets up briefly, pulling away from you and stroking his hand over himself. Spit has managed to smear all over your lips and cheeks and you can feel that your makeup has fallen into a state of disarray. You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand and slide your eyes up his body "I've thought about this every single night since I left. I just can't get you off my mind."

That does something for him, maybe the geuninity in the admission or the soft look on your face, you'll never know but he pulls you up by your arms and kisses you deeply. His hands are back in your hair but this time, the way he's holding you feels so different, almost loving, like you'll break if he isn't gentle.

After a beat he pulls back and searches your face. The entire mood has shifted and the air has grown thick with unspoken words. You'd never guess what he says and when it passes his lips you feel so incredibly full of affection, "You're the only thing I've been able to think about. I spent so many nights just staring at that note. I really and truly am so sorry I kept you waiting."

"We're here now," You whisper and then you pause, thinking. "Do you think you would have called if we didn't run into each other today?"

Your arms are around his neck and you're still close enough that if you leaned forward your lips would touch. "I honestly... I don't know. I want to say yes but to be truthful, love, I was fucking terrified."

"Don't be... there's nothing to be afraid of." And that's that, any other words that could've slipped into the sliver of space between your mouths dies in the air as you pull him back in.

Slowly but surely you slide a hand behind you and lower yourself back onto the couch, bringing him with you. You're vaguely aware of him kicking off his shoes as he climbs on top of you, eventually making himself comfortable as your legs fall into place around his hips.

~

One more part left and then these lovebirds will have a complete story. Give me all your thoughts!!! Do we want part 5 and soon?

If you want to be tagged in upcoming posts you can join my taglist!

Taglist | @sarakaygvf @jakeyboiiiiiii @celestialfauna @gretavanfleas @gretavanlace @koifishkoifish @ageofnyahh @gvfrry @doodle417 @fleetsonfire @joshkiszkas @brokenbellz @thefleetofdreams @angelbabyivy @weightofdreams-gvf @eearevee @dakotadovato @sam-gvf-9 7  @letswalktogether  @alisonwonderland29  @llightmyllovee @hayley1623 @erin-rose-hackl @jakekiszkalovebot  @jakeslovehandles  @theweightofjake  @janelikemaryyy  @jakekiszkasleftnutsack  @hippiestardust  @myownparadise96 

@gretavanflowerpower  @groggyvanfleet  @gvfslayallday  @kayleea122  @kdarling1  @heatmyfleet  @ascendingtothestarsasone  @tripthelightjaketastic @prophetoft  @keighoe @seventieswhore @highwayhunch @weightofdreamz @vader-kai  @irrevocably24 @sammyslappers @mintysammykiszka @angelqueen99 @sammiejane22 @gretasmokerising  @troublegetssoloud71  @jordiesworld @samkiszkalover @alexxavicry @jordierama

[builtbybrokenbells]

Heartbreak Hot Seat | JTK

After seeking refuge at her best friends house, Y/N can’t seem to open up enough to let Josh help her with her troubles. In a twisted turn of events, it appears that his twin brother Jake has the perfect remedy for a broken heart.

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader

Word Count: 20k

Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, fingering (f!receiving), oral (f!receiving), oral (m!receiving), body worshipping, sir kink, impact play, praise, degradation, biting, nipple play, lots (and I mean lots) of dirty talk, lots (can’t stress that enough) of foreplay, body shots, softer sex (compared to what I usually write), overstimulation, multiple orgasm, (sort of) forced orgasm, simultaneous orgasm, begging, very brief and inadvertent mentions of free use kink, slight dom/sub, name calling, touch of angst, mentions of cheating/bad past relationships, breakups, sadness/depression (due to breakups), crying, long emotional talks, drinking, parting, Jake being too sweet for his own good, soft Jake, fluff, swearing, sorry if i miss any!!

hi guys ☺️ i miss writing Jake so much I had to hit you with back to back fics. this is literally porn w plot (over 2/3 of this is just smut I think), so I hope you enjoy this as much as I liked writing it! As always, enjoy, be kind, don’t mind any grammar mistakes 🤍 (I’m so, so happy to be back) (lightly edited 🥰)

“Here, you want to try this?” Josh asked, nudging your arm in hopes of breaking you from your solemn state. You blinked a few times, feeling his elbow on your skin, but his words were far away. They seemed like an echo in an empty room, like you had walked into the place only after he stopped speaking. Breathing seemed like a treacherous task, your bones aching every time your lungs inflated. You stared blankly at his hand, holding a fork in his grasp as he kindly offered you a taste of whatever he was eating. “Jake made it, it’s good.”

Jake made it.

You were sure whatever he made would be good, but the thought of food was worse than sickening to you. You wanted to be kind, to try the meal your friend (even if by extension) had made, especially after he offered you the hospitality for an afternoon hangout his home, but you couldn’t seem to accept the gracious offer. The crowd in the living room was overwhelming, despite only a few bodies being present. The chatter was loud and pulsing against your already busy brain, and Josh’s leg resting against yours was nice, but much more than you could handle in the moment.

Josh knew there was something wrong, but unlike usual, he could not seem to pry it from you. Over the last three nights you had spent crashing in his spare room, he used every ounce of energy to comfort you despite being unaware of what exactly your troubles were. You knew you could reach out to him anytime, talk to him about anything, but right now, it seemed impossible to speak the words aloud.

You had been friends with the boy for what seemed like a lifetime, surviving off his constant company and thriving off his eccentric personality. He stuck by your side through college graduations, career changes, and every challenge life seemed to throw your way. You were a busy woman, and he a busy man, and neither of you had much time for social lives outside of your demanding work schedules. Even so, that fact made your friendship all the stronger, because despite your lack of free time, you always made time for each other.

So when you showed up at his doorstep, 3am and crying while spewing absolute nonsense, he guided you to his spare bedroom and told you that it was yours for as long as you needed. The next morning, he came to check on you only to find you hadn’t slept at all. Hours spent sitting beside you attempting to cheer you up only resulted in further confusion and frustration. Despite his busy life, he cleared his schedule and made it a priority to be with you until you felt better. That afternoon, you managed some small talk, but avoided the elephant in the room. The next day, things felt a little more normal between the two of you. A few jokes were shared, and you even had a movie night in the living room with him and his partner. By then, Josh had vowed to let you speak on your own terms, but was doing everything he could to brighten your mood.

Today, when you woke from a broken and nightmare filled sleep, Josh knocked at your door to ask if you would like to get out of the house. After some internal debate, you decided it might be good for you, it might help you forget the only thing you could seem to think about, even if it was temporary. You showered (with Josh talking through the door and stressing the importance of self-care, of course), changed into some clothes you stuffed into a duffel bag during your quick escape, and the three of you hit the road.

After a short drive, you landed at the door of his twin brother’s house, where you would spend your afternoon. Jake, who you had heard loads of things about, was still a mystery to you. Between conflicting schedules and trying (and failing, sometimes) to find time to hang out with Josh, you never got much of an opportunity to get to know Jake, or even Sam for that matter. You knew he was quieter, a little more reserved than Josh, but was funny and had a heart of gold. You chalked up his praise to being his brother, but you never knew Josh to be a liar about anything. You trusted all he had to say about his brothers, and despite your sadness, you were excited to finally meet them properly, rather than just in passing.

You said a brief hello to Jake at times, mostly when you were leaving Josh’s house and he was heading in. You remembered him to be on the shorter side, but with a breathtaking smile and long, brown hair. When you stepped foot into the house and finally had time to appreciate the man standing in front of you, you understood Jake was a lot more than a pretty smile and long hair. He was stunning, and despite your broken heart, you couldn’t help but stare.

Not long after your brief introduction, the rest of the crowd begin to filter in. Sam and his girlfriend both seemed lovely, and Daniel and the friend he brought with him were just as nice. Jake had made lunch, and whatever it was smelled heavenly even if the thought of food sickened you. After a few hours of laughing and talking, the boys went back for seconds, clearing out the last of the food in the kitchen. The day was dwindling into evening, and you still hadn’t managed to break from your solemn state. You sat, listening to all of the conversations and laughing along to jokes, but didn’t find yourself with enough energy to contribute much.

Josh, clearly picking up on your lack of involvement, was doing all he could to help. Offering food was just another failed attempt of many.

“I’m okay, Josh. Thank you though.” You forced a smile, feeling guilty for your constant rejection. You wanted to tell him so badly, but every time you worked up enough courage to explain it, your words failed you and you thought you might be sick. His sad eyes seemed to be staring into your soul, and it was becoming too much to bear. “I’m, uh, is it okay if I grab something to drink?” You cleared your throat, asking for permission in hopes of changing the subject.

“F’course it is, mama.” He assured you. “You want me to come with you?”

“No, it’s okay.” You assured him, sliding forward and rising to your feet.

“Grab anything in the fridge. I know Jake won’t care.” He said, making sure you didn’t feel bad about taking anything.

“Okay.” You smiled, small but genuine. You didn’t feel deserving of Josh’s kindness, but you were still grateful he cared for you so much. If not for him, you would have nobody to lean on.

Quietly, you walked out of the living room and in the direction of the kitchen Jake had lead you to earlier in the day. When you were alone, you let out a long sigh. The kitchen was decorated nicely, simple but tasteful, and the sweet smell of whatever Jake had cooked was still lingering in the air. Instead of walking to the refrigerator, you took a seat at one of the kitchen chairs pulled out from the table, deciding a minute alone was more important than a glass of water.

You closed your eyes, letting your head fall back on your shoulders. The chatter floating in from the next room was much less overwhelming, and you finally felt like you could breathe without the constant ache in your chest. Just when you felt like you were getting your bearings back, you heard soft footsteps puttering through the hallway. You swallowed the lump in your throat, the same one that was constantly bothering you since you showed up at Josh’s house, and prepared for another round of questions from your best friend. You didn’t turn to face him, figuring he would make himself known in due time.

“Hey, Y/N, right?” The voice was not as familiar to you, and definitely not the voice you thought it would be. You looked over your shoulder, curious as to who was talking. Your eyes landed on Jake, a sheepish smile on his face as he stood by the door.

“Hey, yeah.” You nodded, trying to make yourself friendlier than you felt. It was not Jake making you miserable, or anyone for that matter. You wanted to be having fun, to be getting to know the people most important to your best friend, but the weight on your shoulders made it so hard to enjoy the moment.

“I saw you sneak out, thought I’d come and check in on you.” He explained, careful with his words. “Mind if I sit?” You gave a chuckle, and genuine smile as you listened to his words.

“It’s your kitchen, Jake, f’course you can sit.”

“Right,” he nodded, stepping towards you. “Guess I was wondering if you were up for company, or if you just needed a minute alone. I know it can be a lot to handle when we’re all together.”

“No! You guys are great, guess I’m just not in it today.” You said, knowing he hit the nail straight on the head but you were too nice to admit it. “Come sit, please.” He did as you said, pulling out the chair at the head of the table. He was in perfect view and facing you, giving you ample opportunity to soak in his features as he thought about how to continue the conversation.

“That’s okay, sweetheart. Josh mentioned you were going through a tough time when I called him this morning. We were kinda hoping it would take your mind off whatever’s going on.” You wanted to recoil at the idea of Josh sharing your sorrows with a man you did not know, but the intent was sweet, and you knew Josh would never do anything to harm you. He was just a concerned friend looking for a way to cheer you up. Jake, despite being a near stranger, had enough kindness in his heart to want to help too.

And sweetheart.

You didn’t know the man, nor much about him, but you definitely wouldn’t mind if he called you that again.

“Thank you,” your lips twitched into another smile as you looked down at your hands on the table. “He’s pretty great, isn’t he?”

“Josh?” Jake asked for clarification that he heard right, raising his eyebrow at you. You gave a small nod, almost wanting to laugh at his incredulous tone. “Yeah, I mean I guess. I kind of have to agree, cause he’s my brother and all.” At that, a genuine laugh filled the air, the first one that left your lips in days. Jake was hung on your laugh the minute it left your lips, finding the sound addicting despite just having heard it for the first time. The smile on his face made it apparent he only came to cheer you up, and he was happy he could do it even for a moment. “No, he is pretty great, even if I do hate him by times.”

“It’s a sibling thing, I think.” You said, looking back up at his face. “Love them, even when you hate them.”

“Exactly.” He nodded, agreeing with you. “He’s my best friend, but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to kill him sometimes. Has a great heart, but he can be a bit… annoying.”

“Josh? No.” You scoffed, playing into the bit as clear sarcasm dripped from your tone. At that, Jake let out a laugh of his own. You watched, in amazement at how beautiful such a simple sound could be. “Seriously though, I don’t know what I’d do without him.”

“Yeah, you guys have been friends for a long time, haven’t you?” He asked, leaning forward and into the conversation. It was your turn to nod, finding years of memories flash before your eyes when you thought of it for too long.

“Yeah, I met him as I was finishing up my graduate program in university. He’d just moved here, and I guess he was looking for some friends. Right place right time, I suppose.”

“Funny how things like that work out.” He said, listening intently to every word.

“For sure.” You hummed, pursing your lips slightly at the memory of how you met. “Ran into him at a bar, drunk off tequila and singing a terrible rendition of… oh, fuck, what was it?” You racked your brain, trying so hard to find the name of the song in the mess of your mind. “It was Neil Young, I remember that much.” You sighed, shaking your head at your spotty memory.

“Don’t Let It Bring You Down.” He finished for you, a sparkle shining in his eye as he saw your expression light up.

“Yes! How did you know?” You asked, shocked he knew before you did.

“I was there that night, and I definitely made fun of him just as much as you did.” He explained, chuckling at the thought.

“You were there?” You asked, even more surprised at that fact.

“Yeah, think I was playing pool with Sam. Josh sucks at pool, so he was trying to find a thrill elsewhere. He told us he met someone, he really liked their ‘energy’. Guess he was talking about you.” He continued, nodding at himself as he recollected the night from so long ago. “That, and he sings that damn song every time he drinks tequila.”

“Huh,” you huffed, wondering how you managed to miss him that night. “I guess I was out the door pretty fast. I don’t even think I talked to Josh for very long. Got his number and we were off to the next bar. We loved to party back then.”

“Shame, cause he’s been keeping you an awful secret for the last few years.” Jake let out a disapproving tsk at the end of his statement.

“No, it’s not him.” You promised, shutting down the notion. “Life’s crazy. I’m either always stuck at work, or at home—“ you cut yourself off, hearing the sound of the word fall from your lips. It was wrong, and so much so that it twisted your stomach with nausea. “Stuck at work.” You doubled back, feeling a frown start to form again. The word home felt like a sour taste in your mouth that you couldn’t swallow back.

Jake watched you for a moment, curious about your sudden change of heart, but understanding it might not be the best time to venture into it.

“Did you want a drink, sweetheart?” Jake asked, his eyes flickering to the fridge. “Maybe something to take your mind off it?” You debated, wondering if it would better or worsen your mental state. Before you could decline, he spoke again. “I was gonna have one anyway, so it’s no trouble at all. Be nice to have someone to drink with, anyway.”

“Fuck it, why not?” You breathed, watching as another breathtaking smile blossomed on his lips. “I’m sure it wouldn’t hurt.”

“Great.” He stood, taking two steps past you as he approached a cabinet by the refrigerator. “Want to come have a look?” He offered, looking back over his shoulder at you. You shrugged, nodding as you stood to join him. He opened the doors, revealing a plethora of bottles that all looked a little more expensive than you were used to. “Whatever you want.”

You noticed how close he was standing, how sweet his cologne smelled as it wafted in your direction. It was musky, ambery even, with sandalwood standing strong against the undertones. He had his finger resting against his chin as his eyes scanned the labels, clearly unsure of what he wanted, too. You couldn’t help but study the intricacies of his face, the bridge of his nose and how it casted a shadow over his soft cheeks, the unintentional pout of his bottom lip, and the enchanting colour of his irises. He was stunning, and it was hard not to notice it.

‘Stop it, Y/N. You’re in no position to think anyone is attractive, let alone your best friends brother.’ Your thoughts were right, full of warnings you knew you should listen to, yet there was something so enchanting about Jake that made it difficult to listen. ‘Thinking he’s attractive is only bad if I plan to act on it, which I’m definitely not. It’s okay to admire him, as long as that’s all it is.’ You felt the devil weigh in on the matter, and for some reason, that train of thought was much easier to go along with.

So you did. Simple as that, you decided to allow yourself the pleasure. It was almost as simple as acknowledging how beautiful Jake was.

“Anything catching your eye?” He asked, looking over at you. You knew he was aware of your staring, and when your eyes caught his, your cheeks tinged red. He gave you a smile, silently telling you all was well.

“There’s so much to choose from.” You said, forcing yourself to look back at the liquor cabinet.

“Do you like it straight, or do you prefer something sweet?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at you once again. Although the question was innocent and clearly pertaining to the topic at hand, you couldn’t help but feel your heart speed. Your body was encased in goosebumps at the simple thought of him meaning it in any other way.

“Usually sweet, but I think today I could handle it straight.” You replied, having to tear your eyes away from him again. Had you looked for a moment longer, you might have noticed the ghost of a smirk on his face.

“This is my favourite.” He said, reaching out and grabbing an expensive looking bottle. He brought it down to your level, leaning into you slightly as he let you read the label for yourself. As his arm brushed against yours, you felt the same pull of your heart as you did when he first sat across from you.

“I’ll try it out.” You mumbled, a little breathless as he looked over your face.

“Good taste,” he hummed. “You’ll like it, I promise.” He assured you, his tongue darting out over his bottom lip ever so slightly.

“I trust you.” You said, feeling like you were coercing your tongue to speak the words.

“You should.” He responded, waiting for you to step away first. It felt like an eternity before you stepped backwards towards the table, but when you did, you missed the closeness of him almost immediately. The warmth of his body against yours was memorable, and definitely something you wanted to feel again.

You returned to your seat at the table, followed closely behind by Jake. Before he sat, he grabbed two glasses and the ice tray from the freezer. Carefully, he poured yours first before adding a few ice cubes to the cup. Then, he nudged it in your direction before fixing his own drink.

“What’s on your mind, beautiful?” He asked, swirling his ice around his cup before bringing it to his lips. As he sipped at the amber liquid, his eyes never left your face.

“Oh, nothing important.” You shook your head, averting your gaze to the glass in your hand. You did the same, raising the crystal to your lips and drinking down the alcohol like it was water.

“You’re drinking that awfully fast for someone who’s got ‘nothing important’ going on.” He noted, cocking his head to the side for a moment, as if he was trying to figure you out. “I’ve got an ear to lend, if you want to talk.” He offered, but opted not to press any further. He didn’t want to force you if you weren’t willing, but he did want you to know that the floor was yours if you needed.

“I wouldn’t want to bore you.” You chuckled, watching the condensation of the glass drip onto your fingers. The chill of the liquid distracted you from the severity of the topic. “You’ve been kind enough already, Jake. Seriously, I can’t thank you enough for inviting me.”

“No thanks needed, y/n. Seriously, Josh talks about you enough that I feel like I already know you, and trust me when I say, I like you just as much as he does.” He promised, taking another small sip of his drink. “And I offered, sweetheart. I want to listen, even if you don’t think I do.”

“What is with you two?” You chuckled, shaking your head at his staggering kindness. “Too nice for your own good, both of you.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” He grinned, finding your exasperation amusing.

“No, it’s not.” You shook your head, feeling your heart warm with gratitude for the two brothers. You barely knew Jake, but you agreed with what he said. Josh spoke about him enough that you felt like you were friends already, and by all of the nice things Josh had to say, you definitely liked him. Since stepping foot into the kitchen, you had come to greatly appreciate him for other reasons, too.

“That’s the heartbreak chair.” He explained, running a hand through his hair as he pushed it away from his face. “Something about it draws people in.” Your eyes flickered up to his face, shocked that he made such an assumption, and even more surprised that it was right. He barely knew you, but he could tell without you having to say a word.

“It’s that obvious?” You asked. He shook his head, rubbing his chin in his hand for a moment before he spoke again.

“No,” he cleared his throat, taking in a long breath before he continued. “Like I said, there’s something about that fuckin’ chair.”

“How so?”

“Two years ago, Sam sat there when his girlfriend broke up with him. Must’ve spent the whole night sitting there, drinking away the pain.” He said, thinking back on the event. “And Daniel, a few months back when him and his girlfriend went separate ways. Even Josh, a long time ago when we first moved here.” He explained. “Whatever it is, when people get their heart broken, they sit there. I usually sit here, but it’s not always me they’re talking to. Sometimes it’s Josh, or another friend, or anyone really.” You thought about his words, carefully considering your next question before asking it.

“Have you sat here?” Your eyes were showing the sadness you tried so hard to hide. You didn’t know why, but you were comfortable with Jake. You wanted to talk, to tell him all about the sadness plaguing you. Something about him made you believe that your sorrows were safe with him, and that he was the key to feeling better.

It was an invasive question, something personal and maybe too complicated for him to answer. You regretted asking, but hearing about his brother's sorrows didn’t sit right with you. If you were giving him a piece of you, you wanted a piece of him. He swallowed hard, his eyes flickering between your face and the whiskey in his cup. Eventually, he gave a slow nod.

“More than anyone else, I think.” His honesty was sobering, and it was admirable. Because of his willingness to share his sadness with you, you felt even better about opening up to him. “I’ve never been lucky in love. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.” He shrugged, the joke rolling off his tongue effortlessly despite the hidden pain in his eyes. “About six months ago, I was doing the same as you. Came home, she was gone without a trace. I stayed a few nights at Josh’s house, just ‘till I was strong enough to come back here, and I drank it all away. I’ve sat in that chair, sweetheart. You’re not the only broken heart this house has seen. Trust me.”

“It’s hard to open up to Josh about it.” You said, forcing your hand to hold the glass to the table. The burn of the alcohol in your chest was much preferred to the ache in your heart, but you persevered. “‘Specially when I watch how happy and in love he is. He’s got everything, you know? Nice house, kind heart, beautiful face, and a wonderful boyfriend. It’s intimidating talking about my mess of a life to someone who always seems to have their shit together.”

“I can see what you mean.” He nodded along, agreeing to an extent. “You know, he’d never think differently of you. He loves you a whole hell of a lot.”

“I know that, but I think when you’re this miserable, it’s hard to believe anyone cares that much.”

“For sure.” He said, swallowing down another mouthful of whiskey.

Just as he placed his cup down on the table, the distant chatter in the living room began to move closer. Both of you turned to the entryway to the kitchen, wondering what the disturbance was. Soon enough, the crowd filled the doorway, but only Sam and Josh were visible.

“Think we’re gonna head to the bar, you two in?” Sam asked, oblivious to the situation in front of him.

“I’m good.” Jake said, his tone firm and certain of his answer. Josh looked at you, curiosity in his eyes as he waited for a response.

“Y/N?” Josh asked, wondering if you were joining them. You looked between the twins, your eyes lingering a bit too long over Jake. When you looked back at Josh, you shook your head slightly.

“Think I might hang out here a bit longer, if that’s okay?”

“F’course it is.” Jake chimed in. “You go, I’ll get her back to your place safe and sound.” Josh looked to you once more, making sure you were alright. You gave him a smile, nodding your head in agreement with Jake.

“Okay, I’ll see you later. Love you, mama.”

“Love you too, Josh.” You smiled again, wider and with more warmth than ever.

With that, the group moved towards the door, and they were out in the yard within seconds. The silence hung heavy between you and Jake, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. So far, despite you being a stranger, your talk with Jake had been nothing but comfortable.

“So, does that mean you don’t think I have my life together?” Jake continued where you left off, clearly teasing. The smile on his face gave him away as he pulled his chair a little closer to you.

“‘Spose I don’t know you well enough to know, yet. From what I see, looks like you do, if that counts?” He let out a laugh, finding your humor despite the pain beautiful.

“You hungry?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. “Noticed you didn’t eat earlier.”

“Think I missed the draw on that one.” You said, looking at the empty dish on the stove. He stood, wordless as he walked to the refrigerator. He searched for a few seconds before pulling out a plate, flashing it in your direction.

“Put some away for you, just in case. I knew they would eat it all, so I just wanted to make sure there was some left.” He explained. The sound of his words made your heart ache, but it wasn’t in a bad way; the simple action, especially coming from someone who barely knew you, made the whole world seem a little bit brighter. You understood Josh’s constant talk of how big of a heart Jake had now that you had the chance to see it for yourself.

“Thank you, Jake.” You mustered the strength to speak, in awe of his attention to detail. He stuck it in the microwave, waiting for it to beep before placing it in front of you with a fork. Without mentioning it again, he sat back in the same spot, as if the last few minutes had never happened at all.

“What happened, sweetheart?” He asked again, more direct this time now that he felt he had some kind of leverage. Clearly he made a good enough impression on you, considering you hadn’t run out the door when the opportunity arose. Before responding, you took a few bites of the meal he’d made in preparation for his company. Your eyes fluttered closed in bliss, the taste something you had never experienced before. You weren’t sure if it was just because he was a good cook, or if it was because it had been days since you had a proper meal. Maybe, it was a combination of both.

For such a simple looking pasta dish, it was beyond anything you had ever eaten before.

“This is so fucking good, Jake.” You commended him for his efforts. He let out another laugh, happy that you were enjoying it.

“Good to know,” he nodded. “I’ll have to make it for you again sometime.”

“You’ll never get rid of me.” You joked, placing the fork down for a moment, wanting to make the meal last.

“Not the worst idea in the world.” He shrugged. You felt your cheeks dust with redness, his words almost too sweet for you to handle. You washed down the pleasant feeling of his compliments with another sip of whiskey, settling back in your seat as you prepared to confess.

“I think I’ve always been too blind to see the bad side of people,” you started, simple and easy to kick off the topic. “I like to see the best in everyone, ‘till the very end.”

“Admirable.” He responded quickly, shocking you with his interest in your sorrows.

“I dated this guy for a while, a few years at least. Guess it wasn’t always sunshine and rainbows, but I loved him, or the idea of him, more so. He moved in with me not long after we met, and it was nice. Things seemed real good for a long time, but a couple months ago, he kinda pulled back a bit. I didn’t think much of it, ‘cause I was working all the time anyway, but I probably should have.” You sighed. “I started noticing he was gone when I came home at night, or when he went out, he stayed out far too late for a couple drinks with friends. Found some… suspicious things around the house, but chalked it up to a bad memory.” You laughed, shaking your head at your own stupidity. “I went home after work on Friday, and he was in bed with another girl. Mutual friend, real pretty, sweet on the surface… everything that I’m not.”

“That’s not true, sweetheart.” He shook his head, stopping that thought before it could go any further.

“Think we were long overdue for a breakup, but I thought it would be more decent than that.” You shuddered, recalling the moment that had been plaguing you for days. “I’m less heartbroken over him than I am for the whole thing. It’s just… dehumanizing, I guess. How many times did we… you know, after they started? And in my bed? Where I sleep at night?” You continued, watching the ice circle the bottom of your cup as the liquid neared the end. Jake reached out for the bottle, popping the cork and refilling your glass for you. You smiled, a silent thank you for everything he was doing.

“There wasn’t really a fight, or anything. I mean, I yelled for a little while, but it wasn’t worth my time. I told him to pack his shit and get out, and I assume he did. I haven’t been back, but I haven’t heard from him, either. Guess I just… don’t want to be in that place right now, alone, with that memory.”

“Don’t know the guy, but I can tell you he’s a fucking idiot.” He said, throwing back the last of his drink and refilling his own cup. “I don’t blame you for not wanting to be home. Like I said, I stayed at Josh’s for a while too. Sometimes it’s nice to get out of the place full of stuff that reminds you of them.”

“Yeah, exactly.” You gave a somber nod, blinking away tears threatening your eyes. “Think it always circles back to the same thing at the end of the day… hard not to think it’s me, that I wasn’t enough, or if I could have done more. That’s the hardest part of it, really. Not like he was the boyfriend of the year or anything, but I never would have done that to him.” You took another long swig of whiskey, feeling your head begin to swirl with intoxication.

“It’s not you, Y/N. You know better than that.” He said, furrowing his brow as he thought over your story. “So what is it? What do you need?”

“What?” You asked, unsure of what he meant.

“He got what he wanted, so what do you need, sweetheart? To scream? Cry? To get so drunk that you don’t know where you are?” He listed the offers, as if they were all completely reasonable and understandable. He didn’t want to speak empty words, or give you reassurances that would wash right off your shoulders once he was done speaking. He wanted to help you feel better, however he could. “We could even key his car, if you know where to find it.”

You let out a laugh, one that shook your shoulders and made your stomach ache. While you laughed, tears slipped on to your cheeks, but they did not phase you. Jake’s company was so fantastic that the hurt didn’t even seem to bother you anymore.

“You’re too beautiful to be crying over someone like that, sweetheart.” He leaned over, using his thumb to brush away the teardrops staining your cheeks. Once he finished, he cupped your cheek in his palm, ensuring you knew he was being truthful.

“No idea how you’ve never been the bride, Jacob.” You said, exhaling a long breath as you melted into his touch. It felt nice to be touched at all, and even better to be touched by someone who cared. It felt like it had been an eternity since you had experienced that in particular.

“My day will come, just like yours will.” He promised. “I know it hurts, but with time, you’ll thank him for it, because a girl like you shouldn’t end up with a guy like that.”

“Thank you, Jake.” You said, the utmost sincerity in your voice.

“Don’t mention it.” He brushed off the thanks, smiling over at you. “Now what is it? What will make you feel better, right now? ‘Cause I’ll be damned if I send you out the door before you feel better.”

“I just want to stop.” You sighed, rubbing your face in your hands. “I want to stop hurting, to stop thinking about him, to stop feeling like a different person. I want to feel like me. I want to feel good, instead of being miserable.” Jake leaned back in his chair, watching your face carefully as he thought about your request. You looked over at him, chuckling at yourself. “I know, steep request. Probably not much in the world we can do about that. Yet, anyway.”

“No, there is.” He cleared his throat, pursing his lips together slightly. You raised an eyebrow at him, intrigued by his response.

“Go on.” You urged him, curious about his idea.

“I don’t know if I can help you feel exactly like yourself again,” he started, looking up at the ceiling while he tried to word his response. “But I definitely have a quick solution for some of those problems.”

“Let’s hear it, then.” He smirked at your eagerness to feel better. Before he continued, he threw back the last of his drink for a second time. You could tell he was feeling it now, too. His cheeks were tinged pink and his eyes grew heavier the longer he sipped away.

“You’re open to any suggestions?”

“Well, most.” You huffed, almost annoyed by how long he was dragging this out. “Maybe not murder or armed robbery.” He laughed at your exuberance, shaking his head slightly.

“Well, sweetheart…” he sighed. “You want to stop thinking about him, and you want to feel good.” He listed, waiting to see if he was correct. You nodded in response, still not seeming to piece the two together. “If you’re open to trying it, I’m sure I could solve both of those problems at once.”

“Okay, Jake, this is not helping. Can you just—“ you cut yourself off, your eyes widening in shock as the puzzle finally clicked in place. You swallowed hard, your heart thumping wildly in your chest. As you looked at his expression, your cheeks burned red and your throat went dry. “Just to clarify, are you offering what I think you are?”

“Depends, beautiful.” He said, his tone soft and his eyes trained to your face. “What do you think I’m saying?”

“Are you offering to fuck me?” You wanted to be repulsed by the idea, but you were far from it. If anything, the feeling burning in the pit of your stomach told you the exact opposite, imploring you to fall into his arms and let him do as he pleased with you.

“Well, I’m pretty sure that would get your mind off him.” He argued his point, playful and calm so you knew rejection was more than allowed. “And if you’ll let me, I know I could help with that other part, too.” He let out a small huff of breath, as if he was excited just by the prospect of the opportunity.

“You offer that to every heartbroken girl who sits in this chair?” You asked, ensuring he knew you weren’t denying the offer.

“No,” he shook his head. “You’d be the first, and the only one, I think.”

“You think?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Never know what the future brings.” He shrugged, trying to keep his composure. As soon as he saw your bewildered face, he doubled over in laughter. It took him a few moments to regain his composure, but when he did, he did not seem to retract his statement. When he realized you took his words seriously, he stood from his chair, stepping towards you as he spoke.

“Yes, sweetheart. The only one. Is that what you wanted to hear?” He asked, tucking a lock of hair behind your ear.

“Yes, maybe? I don’t know.” You said, your eyes darting around the kitchen to avoid his heavy stare. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in this situation, so I’m not sure how to react.”

“Only if you want to, of course, but the offer is on the table.” He said, retracting his hand so as not to pressure you into it. You took a drink from your cup, finding your chest burning as you did so. Difference was, you knew it was not because of the liquor. As you sat the cup back on the table, you looked up at him, inspecting him closely.

He was attractive, and that was undeniable. You had been thinking about it since the minute you saw him, and you couldn’t seem to get the thought out of your head. Just half an hour ago, you were shivering from the closeness of his body when you were standing by the liquor cabinet, and now you were quivering just from the thought of his hands on your body. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea, but in the moment, what he was saying made sense to you.

He was hot, you were desperate to forget, and he was offering a quick solution.

“Okay.” You nodded. “Why not?” He watched you for another moment, standing still while you decided for certain that’s what you wanted to do. “Uhm, we won’t tell Josh about this, right?” You asked, a sudden wave of nervousness washing over you.

“Definitely not.” He laughed.

“And it’s just that? Just sex?”

“Just sex, just tonight, if that’s what you want.” He assured you.

“Okay.” You nodded again, more confident this time around. “Just sex, just tonight, with a guy I just met, who happens to be my best friend's twin brother?”

“It sounds better my way.” He said, taking a step towards you.

“Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

“Sex with someone who is happy to make you feel better.” He spoke quietly, kneeling down so he was eye level with you. His face was closer than it had been all night, and if it were even possible, he was even more stunning up close.

“Yeah, that does sound better.” You agreed, smiling slightly as you tried to keep your breathing steady. Jake seemed to prompt more of a physical reaction in you just by looking at you than your ex did in the entire time you’d been with him.

You weren’t sure if it was the whiskey combining with the heartbreak forcing you to make a deadly decision, or if it was just the fact you were attracted to him. Either way, you knew you couldn’t leave his house without a taste of what he was offering, because he had excited you just by mentioning it. You felt like leaving him without knowing what he could do for you would cause more grief than your breakup had in the last few days.

“So what do you say, sweetheart?” He asked, reaching forward and brushing his knuckle over your burning cheek. Your eyes fluttered closed at the touch, but you tried not to let it phase you too much. “You want me to help you forget about him?”

“Think you already have.” You mustered the strength to speak, but not the strength to look him in the eyes. You were sure if you did, you would turn to putty in his hands.

“So you’re saying you don’t need anything else?” He pried, finding the teasing amusing now that he knew you were okay with his actions.

“No, I definitely do.” You corrected him, finally opening your eyes to look over his face. “I really do.”

“Tell me what you need, angel.” He said, flattening his palm against your cheek again. His fingers were tangled in the loose strands of hair hanging over your neck, the action more telling than the last time he touched you. It was firm, more reassuring, and meant to solidify his feelings about the situation.

“You,” you bit the inside of your lip, almost embarrassed about your need for him.

“Don’t be shy, beautiful. Think we’re long past that.” He said, his eyes flickering down to your lips. Although he had full intent to follow through with his earlier promise, he wanted you to be in charge of the matter.

“Kiss me, please.” With that, he leaned forward, pressing his lips to yours as he held your face in his hand.

His lips still tasted like the alcohol he was sipping on, and his skin was still cold from the ice in his cup. Even so, the chill of his skin was quickly offset by the warmth of his tongue as it glided past your lips. The feeling was addicting, much more intense than you thought it might be. Your hands reached out for him, desperate for more. His fingers seemed to be burning into your skin, the touch electric and the sensation ten times more powerful than anything you had ever felt before. The emotion flowing through you from such a simple action was immeasurable, and you already needed more.

“Like that, sweetheart?” He asked, his lips still ghosting over yours as he presented the question. You were breathless, your head spinning and your mind completely free of the painful thoughts that previously seemed permanently attached to you.

“Don’t stop,” you pleaded, your voice quiet. You could feel him smiling, cocky enough to know his plan was already working. “Please, don’t stop.”

“Come with me.” He said, moving away from you and rising back to his feet. Although you were sad he pulled away at all, you knew it was for a better reason. He grabbed the bottle of whiskey and his own cup, waiting for you as you tried to bring yourself back to earth. You took your own from the table, waiting for him to make the next move.

He outstretched his arm, still holding the bottle tightly in his hand as he loosely wrapped the appendage around you. Carefully, he guided you to the hallway. Without any further words shared, he led the way to his bedroom with intent to finish what he started. As soon as you stepped inside, you were surrounded by him. His cologne lingered in the air, and his clothes littered the floor. His bed was messy, but in the most inviting way possible. Patch cords and guitar picks littered the surface of his dresser, and an acoustic guitar took post in the corner of the room.

Although the stipulations of your entanglement did not extend beyond a single night, curiousity got the best of you. With your heart singing a song curated specifically for him, it was hard not to want to know more about him. Seeing his life so intimately made you crave more substance from him, even if it was ridiculous for you to think.

“What’s on your mind now?” He asked, placing the liquor down on his bedside table.

“Nothing bad,” you assured him, still trying to soak in all the room had to offer. “Guess I’m just curious about you now, is all.”

“All you have to do is ask.” He said, taking a few steps towards you. “Later, though, because talking isn’t my top priority right now.” You watched him as he closed in on you, your stomach twisting with excitement at his words. Before he could place his lips on yours again, you swallowed back the last of your drink and placed the empty cup on the top of his dresser, freeing your hands so you only had to focus on him.

You stepped forward, closing the distance between you as your hand landed on his bicep. Now, with the opportune position, he had the luxury to touch you as he pleased with nothing standing in his way. One of his hands fell to your hip, his grip firm as he pulled your body into his own. He leaned down, placing his other hand on the back of your neck as he guided your head towards his. He started slow, fearful he might have come on too strong, but you weren’t willing to take your time with him.

It had been a long time since you had been excited by the prospect of sex, and despite knowing you should not be feeling such a way about anyone, let alone Jake in particular, he had elicited that response from you easier than anyone who came before. Even though his kindness was the most abundant of all his traits, you caught a few glimpses of what lie beneath, and if you were being completely honest, that was what held your attention.

The way his arm felt resting against yours at the liquor cabinet, the sly smile after his ambiguous questions, his heavy stare when he thought you weren’t looking, and the sparkle in his eye when you laughed. That was what drew you in, and everything else was just a cherry on top.

When you first sat with Jake, you almost felt guilty that you were so willing to tell him about your troubles, especially after shutting Josh out. Now, with his lips on yours and his hands exploring your body, it made sense that you felt such a way. Jake was offering much more than Josh could, and he could help in ways that Josh could not begin to imagine. He gave you an easy pass to forgetting, a quick solution to feeling good, and a simple way to move on, even if it were only for a short time. Jake was the perfect fit for what you needed, and you were happy that he was so eager to help.

Time was the only true healer, but Jake was a catalyst to speed the process up, and a very pleasurable one at that.

As the kiss continued, the two of you grew much more comfortable with each other. Your body had relaxed and your hands were more courageous as they travelled over the parts of him you were desperate to know. Your entire body was ablaze with excitement, and your mind was completely free of all the previous fears and feelings you were plagued with. His hand on your hip had drifted to your ass, pulling your hips forward into his as he became familiar with the taste of you on his lips.

If you had any fear about his willingness to sleep with you, it was destroyed within seconds of stepping into his bedroom. You could feel his own excitement, through his actions and other, more obvious signs. As he continued to kiss you, you could feel his erection against your leg, straining against the zipper of his jeans. As much as he wanted to take your mind off of things, you were just as happy to relieve him of the problem you had so easily caused.

When he parted from the kiss, his lips were pink and swollen, glistening with spit under the low light flowing in through his window. His hair was messy from your fingers running through it, and his eyes were darker than they were in the kitchen.

If you thought he was beautiful before, it had nothing on how he looked now.

His hands drifted under the hem of your shirt as he looked over your face, ensuring you were comfortable with continuing. When he was met with pleading eyes and a hopeful expression, his lips quirked up into a smile as he lifted your shirt over your head. As he tossed it to the floor, his gaze traveled downward, allowing himself to admire the parts of you that were usually kept hidden. He sucked in a sharp breath, as if the sight knocked the air from him completely and he was trying to recover from the shock.

“So fucking beautiful, angel.” He hummed, his hands finding you again as he spoke. The feeling of his calloused fingertips against the smooth skin was exhilarating, and even more enticing than anything he’d done before. He dropped his head to the crook of your neck, bringing his lips back to your skin as if he was already missing the feeling of kissing you.

He focused on your neck for a moment, curiously exploring as he tried to find the sweet spots. When his tongue settled below your ear, a whine fell from your lips, so quiet he nearly missed it. The sound reached his ears, sending his skin tingling as it wrapped around his spine and made home there. He kept his attention in the same spot, desperate to hear more. Your hand raised to his arm, holding yourself steady as your stomach swirled with emotion. His mouth continued lower, and courage flooded him as his hands continued to familiarize themselves with you.

He unhooked your bra, brushing the straps from your shoulders as his mouth landed on your collarbone. You felt his teeth graze the skin, the action gentle but purposeful as your bra fell to the ground with your shirt. Now, without anything standing between the two of you, his hand landed on your breast. His thumb drifted over your nipple, moving in a slow circular motion as he felt it harden under his touch. The small sensation only furthered the ache between your legs, and you could feel the wetness begin to soak through the fabric of your underwear.

As he continued his work, you felt your thighs squeeze together in a shameless attempt to ease the discomfort. You didn’t want to rush him, because everything he was doing was phenomenal, but it was growing increasingly difficult to bite your tongue when you so badly needed more from him.

Eventually, his head dropped low enough for his tongue to graze your already sensitive nipple. The warmth of his mouth paired with the precision of his tongue was deadly. You felt a shaky breath rattle your chest as you tried to keep yourself calm, but it was growing increasingly difficult to do so. You needed him more than you needed anything in your entire life; your body craved him in a way you never knew to be possible, and he had promoted more pleasures than anyone before without even needing to take all of your clothes off.

Something about Jake was otherworldly, and his promises to help you forget were not empty. He was doing exactly as he intended, better than you ever thought he could.

He seemed to be enjoying the moment just as much as you were, completely content with pleasing you and never worrying about his own needs. You had never, in your entire life, met someone who was concerned with your needs first.

He pulled his mouth away from you, his eyes fluttering up to your face as he took a few seconds to sort out his thoughts. His eyes were blackened, his pupils completely consuming his irises as he thought about all of the possibilities the night could have.

“Let’s get you out of these,” he muttered, hooking his fingers through the back belt loop on your jeans.

He pulled the fabric away from your skin, letting it snap back to form as he pulled his hand away. The thud of the material against your skin sent another rush of arousal through you, and you found yourself complying to the request without a second thought. He brought one hand to the button, undoing it with ease as he dropped to his knees once again. He pulled down the zipper, tugging on the fabric so they fell down past your hips. As soon as the denim was out of his way, he brought his lips to your stomach, focusing his attention there for a moment before going any further.

You were aching for relief as his tongue drifted over the exposed skin, and you were nearly brought to your knees as he took the time to leave a trail of pink marks where his lips landed. It would be a reminder of the night for days to come, darkening further with time, and you were thrilled at the idea of having a physical memory of his touch when not in his company. He pulled your jeans further down your legs, his lips now ghosting over your hips as he tapped your leg. You lifted one foot from the ground, allowing him to free you from the jeans entirely. You repeated the process with the other leg, and eventually, the jeans were strewn across the floor and gone from your memory completely.

“Jake, I need you.” You huffed, looking down at him, watching carefully where his lips met your skin. He did not respond right away, seemingly wanting to finish what he started before moving on to something new.

Then, his lips pulled away from you, but did not stray too far from their original position. You watched the muscles in his jaw tense as he comprehended the raw emotion behind your words.

“You need me?” He repeated, his voice husky and his eyes heavy as he bargained with the fact.

“Please,” you whispered, breathless as you tried to recover from the constant stimulation he was providing. “So bad, baby.” He drew in a long breath, his eyes fluttering closed as he heard the pet name fall from your lips.

“How could I say no to you when you sound so pretty?” He asked, the question without need of an answer. With that, he used his arm to push you towards the foot of the bed, only stopping when the backs of your knees collided with the mattress.

Then, he rose to his feet, finding himself at eye level with you once again. “What do you want me to do, angel?”

“Anything; just touch me, please.” Your voice was weak, his effect still strong over you even though he wasn’t touching you.

“Anything I want?” He asked, stepping closer and bringing his hand to your side again. He let his fingers trail down until they met the hug of the elastic band of your underwear on your hip. “Are you sure about that?”

“Positive.” You gave a single nod, showcasing your certainty on the matter. He chuckled at your eager nature, looking you over once while he thought of what to do next.

“Lay down for me, sweetheart.” He said, nodding his head towards the bed behind you. “Don’t be shy, get comfortable.” He continued, watching as you turned towards the mattress, unsure if it was possible to climb in and be uncomfortable. The blankets looked soft, and warm, even if they were strewn messily across the surface. The pillows looked like clouds, and there definitely wasn’t a lack of them. More than that, it smelled like him, even from afar. Although you’d only known him for a short time, it had already become a comforting scent for you.

You did as he asked, climbing into the bed and rearranging a few of the pillows. Once you were satisfied, you laid on your back, looking up for him as you awaited further instructions. He gave you a small smile, unable to refute how much he liked the sight of you in his bed, even if it was under strange circumstances.

It was never like Jake to dislike the sight of any girl in his bed, but you seemed to tug on his heart just a little more than others that came before.

“This is a sight I could get used to.” He hummed, adjusting himself in his jeans as he let his eyes trail every bit of exposed skin you had to offer.

“Thought this was a one time thing, Jacob?” He chuckled at your question, unbuttoning the few buttons holding his shirt together. As he slid the fabric from his shoulders, he responded to your inquiries.

“I said if that’s what you want,” he reminded you, dropping the shirt to the floor. Your eyes drifted to his body, drinking in every inch of him. The way the columns of his neck blended perfectly into his collarbones. You studied the structure of his shoulders, focusing intently on his biceps as your eyes trailed down his arms. Then, your gaze moved to his chest, the tan skin decorated with necklaces hanging from his neck. Your admiration ended when your eyes met the buckle of his belt, and you realized he was watching you watch him. “For some reason, I don’t think you’ll be able to stay away.” He sent a wink in your direction to follow his words.

His ego was taking up every spare inch of space in the room, and he was completely different than he was when you were sitting with him in the kitchen. The sweetness still lingered underneath the surface, but his desire had turned him wicked and he was doing everything he could to keep you on his hook. You couldn’t find a single complaint about it, because you loved this version of him even more than the kind hearted man who opened his home and his liquor cabinet to you.

“I think I want another drink,” he started, looking at the bottle decorating his nightstand. His gaze flickered back to you, wanting to ensure you were still watching him. “How about you?” You couldn’t help the sinking feeling in your stomach, wishing that he would just go back to touching you. The banter was fun, and you loved talking to him, but you had needs far more pressing than conversing with him. “Don’t look so disappointed, Angel.” He hummed, grabbing the bottle of whiskey. “I promised to make you feel good, and I’m going to…” he trailed off, popping the cork from the bottle as he kneeled on the bed beside you. “But I have to have my fun, too.”

With that, he brought the spout of the bottle to your navel, carefully letting the trickle of cool liquid fall to your skin. A few droplets trickled down the side of you, landing on the mattress below, but he didn’t care. With great gentleness, he reached out and placed the bottle back on the stand. Without breaking your stare, he settled himself between your legs, his head hovering over your belly as he leaned down a little closer.

With his eyes still settled on your face, he let his tongue glide over your stomach just above your panty line. The skin was already dampened from the spill of liquid from the bottle, cold from the air hitting the wet surface. His tongue warmed the skin, but did much more than just that. The gentleness of his touch cause a plethora of emotions to course through you all at once, and you couldn’t seem to keep your mind straight. The disarray only seemed to worsen as he trailed upwards, drinking up the whiskey like he was a professional on the matter.

When the alcohol was consumed, he did not stop his tyrant. Instead, he continued all the way up until his tongue met your breast once again, circling around your nipple before suctioning his lips to you completely. The warmth and wetness of his mouth was otherworldly, and the new position allowed for his hips to meet yours while he continued teasing you. You shifted down on the mattress, not enough to break his focus, but just enough for your aching core to meet with his cock, strained against his jeans. The contact was minuscule, but enough to elicit a sharp intake of breath from him.

He used his free hand to hold your hips in place, grinding himself down on you ever so slight to give you a bit of relief. The friction was good, even if it wasn’t enough. Paired with the feeling of his tongue on your sensitive nipple, it was enough to pry a moan from your lips.

“Jake, please touch me. Need it so bad.” You whined, feeling your hips raise from the mattress despite his hand holding you down. He pulled his mouth away from you, a small popping sound ringing through the air as he lost the suction of his cheeks.

“You want me to touch you, beautiful?” He asked, shimmying to the side so he could do as you asked. He brought one hand between your legs, resting beside you on his knees as he held himself up with his other arm. His fingers ghosted over the thin fabric covering your aching core, noticing the wetness before he even pushed the fabric to the side. “Fuck,” he hissed, looking down at his hand. “All of this for me, angel?”

“Just for you, baby.” You whimpered, feeling his finger drift over your covered clit. Although you wished that the barrier did not exist, you would settle for what you could get.

“And what’s got you so worked up? It can’t be me, I’m just getting started.” He teased, pushing the fabric to the side. Before he continued, he waited for you to respond.

“It’s you, Jake.” You assured him, almost sheepish of the fact. He was right, he was just getting started, and you were far too worked up for just a few minutes of foreplay. You couldn’t help it, though; between his sinful touches and your own lack of sexual pleasure over the previous few years, you were ready to come undone before he even touched you.

“Don’t tell me he was that bad of a guy.” Jake let out a murmur of discontent at the thought. “Couldn’t think about anything other than himself, even with a girl as pretty as you in his bed?” Your cheeks burned red at his words, embarrassed at the thought of him being correct. “You know I won’t do that to you, angel.” He promised, finally letting his fingers get a feel for the wetness pooling between your legs. “From here on out, it’s all about you. I’ll take care of you, sweetheart. Does that sound good to you?”

“Yeah,” you breathed, nodding in agreement with his idea. To you, it sounded more than good. It sounded fantastic.

With that, he gathered your arousal on his fingers, slowly trailing it up to your clit. He traced slow circles into the already sensitive bundle of nerves, watching your face so he did not miss a single second of your reaction. Your gaze flickered to his face, taking in all of the details while he did the same for you. His brow was furrowed with concentration, and his lips were still slightly swollen from earlier. The muscles in his jaw were tense, and his eyes told you just how happy he was to be pleasing you.

“You know, I was hoping to get you in my bed, even before you sat in that chair.” He confessed, his voice quiet as a sheepish smile crossed his face.

“Y-yeah?” You asked, the word breathy as you felt the pull of pleasure begin to build in the pit of your stomach. You were intrigued by his statement, so much so that it took your mind away from the burning desire for a moment.

“Yeah,” he affirmed, smirking at your obvious curiosity. “Been thinking about it since the first time I saw you at Josh’s house.” He continued, carefully letting himself move closer. He propped himself up on his forearm, moving his body down towards yours. “You walked out, all dolled up in a pretty little dress. Blue, if I remember right. I wasn’t really looking at the dress.”

He was right, and you could remember the scene just as well as him. It was the only blue dress you owned, and you were on your way to lunch with a potential client, which was why you were so eager to get out the door. He was carrying his guitar, in a cutoff t-shirt and jeans that hugged his legs just right. You were both younger, a little more naive and much more childish. You could remember being stunned by his long brown hair, tousled by the wind, and the sunglasses that sat low on the bridge of his nose. He was beautiful then, just the same as he was now, but you were too afraid to introduce yourself. You managed a small greeting as you passed by him, and spent the whole drive to the restaurant with the picture of him stuck in your head.

“Been waiting that long, Jacob?” You asked, finding a bit of strength to tease him back.

“I wouldn’t say waiting,” he chuckled. “But definitely thinking about it. Prettiest girl to ever walk out of his house, and the prettiest girl to ever step foot in mine.” He continued with the flattery, sliding his middle and index finger to your entrance. Before he continued, he slipped his fingers inside of you. As he began to pump his fingers, he let his thumb drift over your clit. The combination of the two sensations was overwhelming in the best possible way. “If I had it my way, I would have fucked you right there on his porch.” The vulgarity of his words may have been off putting in any other context, but as he said it, your walls fluttered around his fingers and another intense wave of arousal washed over you. “And you would have let me, wouldn’t you?”

You were nearly delirious from the pleasure steadily growing in the pit of your stomach. Your skin was ablaze, the sensation growing stronger with every word he spoke and every touch he gave you. You were willing to tell him anything and everything he wanted to hear as long as it meant he wouldn’t stop.

“God, yes. I would have.” You whined, moving your hips down on his hand as his fingers curled upwards, hitting the sweet spot inside of you.

You weren’t lying, either; had you known at that time he could make you feel so good, you would have let him do whatever he wanted to you. At the sound of your tone filled with need for him, he made it a point to curl his fingers upwards again as he pumped them into you. As his fingertips brushed over the sensitive spot he’d found with ease, a moan filled the air, loud and desperate for him to keep going. “Oh, fuck me.” You groaned, gripping at the sheets below you.

“I intend to, sweetheart.” He replied. Although he knew you did not direct the message to him, he felt the need to interject his own thoughts anyway. As the words left his mouth, he leaned down, pressing his lips to yours. He couldn’t help himself; he was compelled to kiss you, feeling that he might not be able to survive without the taste of you on his tongue.

His fingers continued to move with intent, eager to pry an orgasm from you. The knot in your belly was tightening further by the second, your skin tingling with pleasure as another moan tore through your chest. He drank in the sound like a man dying of thirst, feeling lucky to be the one experiencing such intimacy with you, even if it was under strange circumstances.

He broke from the kiss as he felt your walls clench around him again, knowing that you were closer to a climax than you would ever admit. He increased the pressure of his thumb, watching you carefully so he did not miss the moment he’d been patiently waiting for.

“That’s it, gorgeous.” He crooned, drunk of the pleasure twisted amongst your features. The praise washed over you like summer rain, settling deep in your stomach and furthering the intensity of the feeling. Your brow was furrowed, your eyes squeezed shut and your lips parted ever so slightly, allowing the most beautiful sounds to cross them. “You’re so fucking hot.” He muttered, propping himself up a bit further for a better view. As much as he wanted to focus on your face, he felt his eyes trail down to his hand, unable to resist the only other sight that could compare to your pretty face.

He sucked his bottom teeth between his lips, biting down on it as he watched his fingers disappear into your cunt.

Your eyes cracked open, desperate to catch a glimpse of him before you descended into the organ that was quickly approaching. When you caught sight of his face, you noticed his eyes were not looking at you like they had been moments before. When you followed his gaze, seeing what he was so fixated on, you felt a whole different type of emotion wash over you. He did not notice your stare, too caught up in the sight to even care about anything else. You were enthralled in him, watching him admire you like you were the most precious thing he’d ever seen.

You bit down on your lip, feeling the warmth in your stomach begin to spread to the rest of your body. You were so close, so ready to give in to the temptation of the feeling, but you weren’t ready for the moment to come to an end.

Within a second, that train of thought was completely disregarded, unimportant and needless.

A low groan, resembling more like a growl sounded through the room, coming from deep in his chest. His eyes turned dark, almost animalistic as he was taken by his desire for you. It was a simple thing, so unimportant in comparison to everything else he was doing to you, but it was everything to you. To know you could drive such a beautiful man to such desperate feelings made you weak, and knowing he was just as taken by you as you were with him sent you over the edge.

The orgasm that took hold was stronger than any you had ever had before. Your entire body was immersed in euphoria, from the very tips of your toes to the muscles in your face. Not one part of you was spared from his wicked power, and as your legs trembled, you came to terms with the fact he was right; heartbroken or not, you were hooked on him. Walking away would be ridiculous, and coming back for more was a given. You could not comprehend the idea of never feeling such a way again, and that made it all the harder to equate your solution for heartbreak to a single night.

“That’s it, angel. Doing so good for me.” His words seemed far away, but the sentiment behind them stuck with you indefinitely. He continued pumping his fingers into you, coaxing you through the climax with his hand and his words. You had never felt more important, more cared about than you did with him, like your enjoyment was the only thing in the world that mattered.

He pulled his fingers out of you, his gaze flickering to your face as he raised his hand to his mouth. You watched as he slipped his middle finger past his lips, glistening with your release as it landed on his tongue and his mouth closed around it. As the taste filled his senses, his eyes fluttered closed and a low groan rattled his chest. Your face flushed, your stomach pulling with another bout of pleasure as you watched the scene unfold in front of you. He pulled his finger from his mouth, a slight popping sound filling your ears as the digit slid off his lips. Your eyes squeezed shut, the sight nearly pornographic, and hotter than anything you had ever witnessed before.

“Taste so fucking sweet, baby. Just like I thought you would.” His words were soft, gentle as they filled the air around you. You couldn’t look at him, fearful that if you caught his eye, you would descend into another orgasm without him even touching you at all.

Your knuckles ached as you released your iron grip on the sheets, your body relaxing against the mattress as you came down from the high. Your lungs ached for a full breath of air, and your skin was still tingling with the ghost of pleasure. You looked down at Jake, expecting him to be watching you, waiting for your next move, but he was doing none of those things. He was tossing his belt to the floor, sliding out of his jeans and boxers at once and tossing them in the growing pile of clothes on the floor. You noticed his frantic nature, taking a second to discard your underwear and toss them to the floor as well. He didn’t say a word, making a move to shift downwards on the mattress. He settled between your legs, his hands on your hips as he pulled you down towards his face.

He guided your legs over his shoulders, settling his palms on the tops of your thighs as his lips dusted light kisses over the inside of them. As you both grew more comfortable with the new position, you felt his confidence grow, too. His teeth grazed over the sensitive skin, his tongue following the path to sooth any irritation that might occur. Goosebumps littered your entire body, and every nerve was aflame with desire for the boy who made home between your legs. You watched him, a wondrous sparkle in your eye as you inspected his every move.

Was it normal for someone to be this attentive, to be so concerned with making you feel good? Had you been missing out on such a fantastic experience, wasting your time with someone who was only concerned with himself? Or was Jake just so phenomenal that he made everything a million times more fun?

You did not know, and you did not care; the only important thing to you was him, and he was doing well in making you forget about all of your other worldly troubles. The only thoughts in your mind were pertaining to him and his ability to please you. He was like poison, infiltrating every thought and every emotion, completely taking over without you even thinking twice about it.

His eyes flickered upwards, meeting yours in a silent inquiry. The trail of love bites on your thigh was darkening by the second, and his gaze was burning into you.

“Talk to me, sweetheart.” He ordered, but it was hard to comply to his wishes when it felt like his fingers were searing into your skin.

“I-I just… sex has never been like this before.” You breathed, wondering how he knew something was wrong despite you not saying a word. He was effortlessly in tune with you, feeling every emotion coursing through you as if it were his own. “It’s never been so good, and I’ve never been so… taken care of.” You squeaked out the last few words, embarrassed to admit it to him.

“Oh, don’t tell me that, angel.” He muttered, almost pained at the thought. “If I had known he wasn’t taking care of you, I would have done it myself, a long time ago.” The sincerity in his tone made your head spin, and you were almost regretful that you had been so caught up on a man who wasn’t worth your time, when you could have been spending your time indulging in someone like Jake. “You mean to tell me he wasn’t doing this?” He asked, obviously referring to the act he was about to commit. Your cheeks burned red as you shook your head, silently answering him. “What a fucking idiot.” He muttered, clearly to himself.

Instead of continuing the conversation, he pulled your hips down a little further, letting his actions speak louder than his words. He lowered his head, and you held your breath as his mouth connected with your core. His tongue slowly ran through your folds, starting at your entrance and ending at your clit. He let his focus remain there for a moment, circling around the sensitive bundle of nerves as your hands snaked down your body, tangling themselves in the long locks of his hair. Your felt his tongue dip down to your entrance again, flattening against you as he repeated the same process from earlier, savouring every drop of arousal you had to offer him.

As his tongue reached your clit again, he let out a long hum of satisfaction, like the moment had curbed every craving he had for you in an instant. He pulled away from you for a moment, looking up as he listened closely to your shallow breathing. “I could stay between your legs for the rest of my life, and I’d be fucking happy to do it.” He said, his tone gruff as some residual anger remained in his mind. “Now that I’ve had a taste, I don’t think you’ll be able to get rid of me.”

A whimper fell from your lips, completely uncontrollable as you tried to sear the memory of him between your legs into your brain for eternity. He returned his mouth to you, using the sound as encouragement while he continued on with his work.

Jake was a force you were not familiar with, yet you feared you may never fully grasp his power. You met him at the perfect time, and he offered his services when you needed them most. It was supposed to be a quick fix, a simple solution to stop the pain from tearing you in two, but it quickly grew into something much more than that. Now that you had a chance to experience pleasure at his hands, you weren’t ready to give it up.

Calling Jake a rebound would be ridiculous, because he was the furthest thing from it; in just an hour, he gave more to you than your ex did in years.

Like you said earlier, you were mourning the situation more than you were mourning the person or the relationship itself. The picture of betrayal had been seared in your mind, the self-doubt and self-hatred was abundant, and maybe there was a hint of sadness over the loss of routine, but most of your ailments were not caused by the man himself. With Jake’s help, that became incredibly apparent, and the rest of the sadness and anger seemed to fade away the longer his hands were on you.

“A-ah, fuck.” You hissed, your fingers tightening in his hair as an intense wave of pleasure took hold. “Feels so good, Jake.” Instead of pulling away to respond, he hummed against you, the vibration of the sound furthering the sensation he was already giving you. He wanted to hear how good you were feeling, how good he was making you feel. His ego hadn’t gone away, and your compliments only fed it further. You would be uncomfortable with his cockiness if it were not warranted, but from everything he’d done so far, you understood that he was the only man you had been with who had a right to be so self-assured.

His hands inched up your legs, his grip loosening as he moved his fingers. The light tickle sent a shiver down your spine, and your head was spinning as his grasp slowly settled on your hips. His tongue continued to circle around your clit as he pulled you a little further down on his face. A moan filled the air, much more desperate than the last and the vulgarity immediately categorizing it as pornography. You weren’t sure if such a sound ever left your lips before, but you did not have time to focus on the fact before another one followed up the last.

Your cheeks were burning to the touch, your skin blotchy with redness and glistening with sweat. Your hands were anchored in the roots of his hair, and his tongue was driving you so crazy that you couldn’t help the automatic roll of your hips against his tongue. You were bordering the edge once again, and he seemed to have no intent to slow. One of his hands remained on your hip as the other began to explore, dusting over your stomach with great gentleness. It was a staggering difference between the hand on your hip, which was holding you tightly, as if he was scared he would lose you if he let go.

You were lost in the movements of his tongue, no other thoughts existing within your mind as he continued with his precise actions. The warmth of his mouth was heavenly, the wetness of his tongue making every move all the more remarkable. His hand raised to your chest, finally finding what he had been blindly searching for as his palm cupped your breast. You squeezed your eyes shut, letting your head fall back onto the pillow as you tried to keep your breathing steady. Then, his fingers found your nipple, brushing over it and sending jolts of pleasure through you. The sensation combined with the feeling of his tongue was indescribable, addicting, and intoxicating. You felt drunk off of him alone, and you never wanted to sober up.

Just when you thought you were accustom to the multiple sensations all at once, he moved his hand, taking your nipple between his thumb and his forefinger and giving one hard pinch. You let out a gasp, your hips bucking forward into his mouth even further. You could see the shake of his shoulders, showcasing his silent laughter at your reaction.

Even if you wanted to be upset at him, you had no idea how to be. Being angry with Jake seemed like an oxymoron, two things that could not coexist together. If anything, all you wanted to do was praise him for all he had done to help you.

He retracted his hand from your chest, snaking it back down your body. He brought it underneath your leg, bringing his middle and ring finger to your entrance. He pushed them inside of you, with the same curl to his fingers as earlier. The added stimulation was heavenly, and a sure apology for his earlier action. He barely had to pump his fingers at all before your back was arching off the mattress, desperate and shameless for more.

“Jake, baby.” You warned, the words coming out hastily and jumbled together. “M’gonna cum.” You forced the rest of the sentence out, the fire in your belly blazing and threatening to take hold.

He hummed against you again, encouraging you to give in and let go. With one last curl of his fingers paired with the flick of his tongue, your second orgasm took over. Your legs trembled with the intensity of the feeling, your hands holding his hair as if you were afraid of floating away if you let go. The air was filled with obscenities, curses and praise for his work as you descended into the pleasure. If his mouth wasn’t occupied, you knew the praises and encouragement would be the most beautiful thing you had ever heard. He coaxed you through the moment, and your heart rate began to slow and your muscles started to relax from the tension.

Difference was, this time he didn’t slow.

His tongue continued to trace your clit with more intent than before, as if he wanted to see how far he could take it before you gave in. At first, the feeling was uncomfortable, but the idea of stopping was more troublesome than the sting of overstimulation. Instinctively, your body tried to pull away from him, but he used his hand on your hip to hold you in place. Your hands remained in his hair, but did not try and pull his head away from you. You wanted him, and the orgasm he had just given you was inexplicably addictive. You wanted to feel that way again so bad that you could spare the few moments of discomfort in exchange for something so fantastic.

The noises falling from your lips had upped in intensity, and definitely felt more dramatic. You were loud enough that you feared the neighbours might hear you had they stepped outside. He was living in the moment, driven near insane from the desperation in your voice. You looked down, and despite your blurred vision, did the best you could to admire him while you had him like such. His hair was a mess, still knotted around your fingers. The muscles in his back were tight, flexing with every move of his arms. His knuckles were locked in place around your hip, decorating it so nicely that you dreaded the moment he had to let go.

Although beautiful, those were not the things that held your attention. Instead, you were drawn in by the sight of his hips grinding into the mattress below. Pleasing you had worked him up so badly that he himself was aching for relief, unable to control how badly he needed to be touched. The thought was maddening, and the sight drove you over the edge.

Before the overstimulation even began to wear off, your body was forced into another climax that put the previous ones to shame. Your throat was raw from crying his name, your entire body aching from the violence of the feeling. For a moment, you thought you might die at the hands of his sin, but not even that thought could force you away from him. Your lungs burned and your head swam with thoughts of nothing and everything, all at once.

You had never felt such a way in your entire existence, and even when your body began to recover from the effects of his tongue, your mind had fallen far behind. You were barely holding on to reality as he finally withdrew his fingers from you, and your head was completely elsewhere when his head moved away, too.

“Could listen to you scream my name like that every fucking night.” He growled, pressing his wet lips to your thighs so he did not have to give up contact with you entirely. “God you’re a fucking masterpiece. Can’t believe it took so long for me to have you like this.”

He didn’t give you a chance to respond, instead wiping away your release from his chin and moving upwards so he could kiss you. As his hips landed on yours, you felt his cock press against your soaking core, the warmth of bare skin against skin nearly driving you into another orgasm. You were floored at his ability to make you feel good, and amazed that nobody else could make you feel such things. As his tongue glided across yours, you could taste yourself on him, only making the moment even more remarkable. It made him even more addicting, and you were certain you could get used to having him in such a way.

“Just a second, sweetheart.” He slurred, drunk off of you. He pulled away from you, sliding out from between your legs and climbing out of bed. You watched him, breathless and stunned at the picture of him completely naked in front of you. It was the first moment thus far that you had the chance to admire him fully, and you never wanted to stop.

He was painfully hard, the tip of his dick red with irritation from the rough threads of the sheets and glistening with wetness from where he was resting against you. The sight sent you mad, your mouth watering and your need for him growing tenfold. He turned to his bedside table, rummaging around in the drawer in search of a condom. When his fingers landed on the box, stuffed way in the back and hidden under a pile of junk. He looked over at you, smiling shyly as he pulled one from the box.

“Don’t really need these all that often.” He chuckled, an inadvertent way of telling you he was being truthful when he said you were the only one he offered his services to.

“Wait,” you uttered, watching as he raised the package to his mouth to tear it with his teeth. He froze in place, worried that you might have changed your mind.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” He asked, ready to discard the foil square in his hand and dress himself if you were uncomfortable. “Do you want to stop, or slow down?”

“No!” You shook your head, feeling bad that the thought even crossed his mind. Instead of letting his anxiety get the best of him, you sat up from your laying position. Carefully, ensuring you had your balance, you shifted so you were resting on your knees, facing him. You looked up, giving a small smile as you beckoned him closer. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion, but he stepped towards you anyway.

Only when you reached out for him did he understand your intentions. He sucked in a sharp breath, watching as you grabbed his hand and guided him closer to the edge of the bed.

“Tonight is supposed to be about you, angel.” He muttered, a weak protest against your actions.

“I want to, Jake.” You assured him, unable to refute your desire to please him, too. “Please?” You looked up at him, doe-eyed with faux innocence written over your features.

“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath, unable to resist the temptation. “I had no idea you were such a whore.” Even if his words were venomous, his tone did not match. He had such a way with words that even his insults sounded like praise. “Go ahead then, if you want it so fuckin’ bad.”

You debated thanking him for his kindness, but you opted to do it with your actions, instead. You leaned toward, bringing your mouth to him. You parted your lips slightly, letting your tongue glide over the head of his cock. The saltiness of the pre-cum staining his skin lingered on your lips as you took him in your mouth. You bobbed your head down slowly, allowing spit to accumulate on your tongue as you let it glide over the underside of his cock.

As you moved your head down on him, your eyes fluttered closed in concentration. His size was something you weren’t used to, but you had enough confidence to follow through with your efforts. When you felt his tip hit the back of your throat, your eyes watered as you fought back a gag. Desperate to impress, you relaxed your throat as you took him all the way. You felt him twitch in your mouth, letting you know that he was enjoying the moment just as much as you hoped. A string of curses fell from his lips, followed by a long groan. The sound only worsened the persistent ache between your legs, but you carried on, knowing that he would take care of that once you took care of him.

He raised his hand to your hair, gathering it in his hand and holding it away from your face. His eyes were permanently fixated on you, terrified of missing even a second of the view in front of him. You sat there for a moment, allowing yourself to grow comfortable with the feeling before forcing yourself to swallow, despite the momentary discomfort. As your throat constricted around him, he took in a sharp breath, overwhelmed by the sensation. Another groan tried to force it’s way from his chest, but he tried to hold it back, resulting in the sound coming out more similar to a whine.

Even if it was unintentional, it drove you fucking crazy.

You pulled back in one swift motion, inhaling a breath of air as his cock fell from your lips. Trails of spit covered your chin, but it did not phase you. Before he could recover from the loss, your mouth was on him again.

“Ah, fuck, sweetheart.” He growled, his grip in your hair tightening. “Full of fucking surprises tonight.” Your eyes flickered upwards, catching his stare as you bobbed your head down on him. You longed to sear the picture in your mind forever. His hair was disheveled, his jaw-hard set and his eyes crazed as he studied your every move. He was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, and you were certain of that. You felt lucky to be able to please him in any way, and grateful to have caught his eye all those years ago.

As you drew your head upward, you let his cock leave your mouth completely, deciding to give him a show. You circled your tongue around his tip, pursing your lips as you placed them on the side of his dick. You pushed your tongue flat against him, suctioning your cheeks just a bit to add some pressure. As you moved your mouth down his cock, you made sure to keep eye contact with him the whole time. When you reached the base, you slowly ran your tongue over him as you brought your head back to the tip. Without breaking the momentum, you took him back in your mouth and bobbed your head back down until his tip hit the back of your throat again.

You started a steady pace, listening intently to every sound that passed his lips. It wear encouraging, and it was hot. If you had to say, it was the most attractive thing you had ever heard. As you felt him slide down your throat again, you let out a moan. The vibration amplified the already intense feeling, causing his head to fall back on his shoulders as he hissed out a long string of curses. You could feel him throbbing in your mouth, desperate for a release but unwilling to give in to it just yet.

In truth, you would not have minded. He had been beyond generous already, and to do him a kindness was the only way you thought fitting to repay him. Even if you would miss out on fucking him, you were happy to be used by him in any way.

As you continued at the same pace, you could feel him begin to lose himself to the pleasure. As your head came down on him, his hips involuntarily moved too meet with you. The constant pressure in the back of your throat was making it difficult to keep calm, but you persevered until he pulled away first. A particularly sharp thrust of his hips sent you over the edge, and the gag you tried so hard to stop finally forced its way out. Your throat constricted around him again and your eyes welled with tears. Hastily, he pulled away from you, his chest heaving as his concerned eyes looked over your face.

“M’sorry, angel. You okay?” He asked, crouching down so he was eye level with you.

“Yeah, I’m good, it’s okay.” You promised, nodding you head. He raised his hand to your cheek, swiping away tears that had fallen from your eyes.

“We can take a break if you need it,” he assured you, holding your gaze. “Don’t be afraid to tell me if I’m going too fast or if it’s too much.”

“I’m okay, I promise.” You gave him a soft smile, well recovered from the moment of slight tension. He watched you for a moment longer, wanting to be certain. When he realized you weren’t going to change your mind, he leaned forward and pulled you into a kiss. The softness of the action was all you needed to feel better again. “Can you fuck me? Please?” You muttered the words against his lips, unable to wait until he was finished to ask the question.

“You want me to fuck you, sweetheart?” He asked, intrigued by your excitement.

“Yes, please.” You breathed, needing it like you needed air. The desire you had for him was nearly debilitating, and since he’d stopped touching you, there was no relief for the grating need.

“Turn around for me, Angel.” He said, rising to his feet. He was in no position to deny you anything, because he wanted it just as bad.

You did as he asked, noticing he was reaching for the foil wrapper on the nightstand again. You couldn’t comprehend the grief that washed over you as you saw it, and the words rushed out faster than you could stop them.

“I’m on the pill,” you said, hearing him freeze in place. “I’m clean, too.” You were telling the truth, because before him, unprotected sex wasn’t even a thought in your mind. Whatever he had done to you that night seemed to permanently alter your mind, and the simple thought of not having him completely was sickening.

“Me too.” He hummed, almost relieved that you told him. He tossed the condom back on the table, the dull clatter of the impact prompted a smile on your face.

You backed up closer to him, your knees resting near the edge of the mattress and your feet dangling off the edge. He stepped towards you, his hands reaching for your hips as he positioned himself between your legs. His touch drifted over your ass, appreciating you while he had you in such a way.

“You have no fucking idea how good you look like this.” He praised your beauty, his voice deep and laced with desire. One of his hand fell from your hip, and seconds later, you felt his cock rest against your cunt. Slowly, he ran the tip through the wetness that was worsening by the second. “You want it, sweetheart?” The husky tone settled deep in your bones as you dropped to your forearms, bringing your top half lower to the mattress. You pushed your hips back towards him, adding a little more pressure to your clit, which he was resting against.

“So bad, Jake.” You pleaded, looking back over your shoulder at him.

“What was that, Angel?” He asked, sliding himself back down to your entrance. “Couldn’t quite hear you.” There was a smirk on his lips, cute enough to help him get away with the teasing, but irritating enough to bother you.

“Please, baby.” You whined, trying again.

“Please what?” He pressed further, pushing his hips forward ever so slightly. The miniscule change was agonizing, but it still made your head spin. “I want to hear how bad you want me, beautiful.”

“Please fuck me, Jake.” You finished your broken sentence, your tone stronger than it had been all night. “I need to feel you, please.” With that, you pushed your hips back again, testing your limits.

Unlucky for you, at the same time, he thrusted forward with force, causing the impact to be so much more intense.

“A-ah, fuck!” You yelped, the size of him something brand new to you. The way he filled you was enough to bring you to your knees, but the painful sensation of his cock hitting your cervix amplified the pleasure even further.

“There you go, baby.” He crooned, completely disregarding your response as he drew his hips back and slammed back into you with the same energy. “How does that feel?” The slight sneer in his tone was aggravating, but you had to admit that it looked really good on him. The sudden change in attitude made you realize that what had come before that moment was not typical for Jake. He was snarky, arrogant, and he liked to be in charge. You could tell by his fingers bruising your hips and his tone talking down to you.

Although you thoroughly enjoyed the time you already spent with Jake, it almost made you sad when you realized what exactly you missed out on.

As you were stuck on the thought, you felt a sharp sting across your ass. The sensation on your skin combined with the pleasure of him inside of you, making you quiver under the touch. “Answer me when I fucking speak.” He barked, letting his fingers gently caressed the reddening skin where his hand made contact. You weren’t sure if it was purposeful or absentminded, but the sweet touch after the harsh words felt good, reassuring that he was only putting on an act.

Then, you decided if he wanted to push you, you could do the same to him. The worst that could happen was a punishment, and the idea of punishment at Jake’s hands was nothing but thrilling.

“Feels so good, sir.” You exaggerated your tone in hopes of getting under his skin, but the term of endearment seemed to short circuit his brain. His hips stuttered and his hands tightened their grip.

“Such a fucking whore,” he spat, his words quiet as he regained his composure. Even if his words were harsh, you could tell by his voice alone how much he enjoyed your attitude. “I love it.” He muttered the words to himself, but you heard it despite his efforts to keep it to himself. He felt your walls flutter around him, drawing him in further and deeper, encouraging his antics even further.

One of his hands raised to your hair, gathering it in his fist and knotting it around his hand. He tightened his hold, pulling your head back ever so slightly as his hips continued at the same, bruising pace. You arched your back even further, your chest nearly brushing against the mattress now as your ass raised to meet his hips.

“That’s my girl,” he hummed, holding your hips as he upped the strength in which he was thrusting into you. “Take it so fucking good.”

The knot in your belly was tightening further by the second, threatening to snap with every move. You were crying his name, praising him for his hard work as he pushed you closer to a climax. You were sure his bedroom would never recover from the pornographic display the two of you found yourselves in, and the thought served as a comfort. You wanted him to think about you every time his bedroom door closed, remembering how you looked in his bed as he fucked you from behind. You wanted him to picture the way your ass met his hips every time he closed his eyes, and you never wanted him to forget the feeling of you wrapped around him.

Although he intended to solve your problems, you wanted to create a new, constant one for him; one that plagued him every night and haunting him during the day. You wanted Jake to succumb to the need of you, and you wanted your number to be a constant call in his phone, begging you to come over so he could curb the urge for a little while. You wanted to infiltrate every thought that crossed his mind, because you could not stand the idea of him giving this to anyone else.

“You want to cum already?” He asked, recognizing the tremble of your legs and the desperation of your high-pitched moans. “So fucking needy you can’t even enjoy it for a while?” He chastised you, but both of you knew there was zero malice behind his behavior. He was living for the way you moved against him, surviving off the sound of your pleasure. He was thrilled to drive you to such a state so easily, and he would give you whatever you wanted, so long as you asked nicely.

“Please, sir. I want it so bad. I need it.” You stressed the importance of the topic, feeling the burn begin to overtake your entire body. The urge was impossible to stave off, and you knew there was no use in trying. After all he’d done to you so far, you were long past self-control.

“Fine, but you better not hold back. I want to hear every one of those filthy fucking noises.” He growled, pulling your head back with a little bit of force. “Put on a good show, sweetheart, or I might not be so nice next time.” He warned, holding your head in place with one hand and your hip with his other. He pulled you back on him, making the impact even more powerful. The painful pleasure pulsed through your entire body, so intense that you could feel it behind your eyes. With every thrust of his hips, you grew closer to the release you so desperately needed.

In exchange for him giving you what you needed, you gave him exactly what he asked for.

“Oh, god, Jake.” You whined, upping the dramatics for the sake of his request. “You feel so good, baby. Please don’t stop.” You pleaded, feeling your head spin with the threat of your climax. You could hear his shaky breaths, the sound of your words hitting him harder than he anticipated. His hips remained steady, though, never faltering as he continued on exactly as you asked him to.

“Come on, angel.” He huffed, looking down at the curve of your ass, watching himself as he fucked into you. The permissive statement sent you spiralling, pushing you over the edge with little thought.

“Fuck, Jake.” You groaned, feeling your stomach burn with pleasure. Your hands were balled into fists, knuckles white as you gripped the sheets. Your arms and legs felt like they would give out from under you as they trembled. Jake seemed to notice the same thing, and the hand holding your hip slipped under you, holding you up so you did not have to worry about anything other than feeling good.

“That’s it, baby. That’s my girl.” He crooned, never letting up on his pace as he continued to fuck you through the climax. Even as you came down, your body did not relax. Your skin was ablaze and your forehead was glistening with sweat. You were tired, and the feeling of him inside of you became less pleasant and more intense as he continued to thrust into you. Your noises became less angelic and more desperate, as if they served as a warning for him to slow down. Overstimulation was threatening your exhausted mind, driving you closer to insanity by the second as the burn of irritation began to spread.

“Jake,” You wheezed his name out, trying to bargain with him as he increased the speed of his hips. “Jake, please.” You pleaded, now for an entirely different reason.

“What, you wanted it so bad and now you can’t take it?” He growled, his hips still moving at a relentless pace. “You can take it sweetheart, I know you can. Be good for me, baby. Just a little longer.”

“I don’t know if I can.” You cried, your throat raw from the desperation of your moans. Both of you knew he would stop if you really needed it, but he would be damned if he gave up before you truly needed him to.

“You can, beautiful. Being so good for me.” He rushed out, clearly growing close to his own climax. “Don’t you love being a good girl for me?” He asked, easing up on you ever so slightly.

“I do,” you whimpered, feeling his hand in your hair push your head towards the mattress. The strength of his thrusts had lessened, and the overwhelming sensation started to become pleasurable again. “I love it.”

“I know you do, sweetheart.” He whispered, desperation beginning to set in for him, too. He loosened his hold around your hips, knowing you were much steadier, now. He moved his hand between your legs, his middle finger finding your clit with ease. “Just a little while longer, baby. I’m not done with you yet.”

“Oh, fuck.” You groaned, his words giving you the strength to keep going. You clenched around him, amplifying the sensation for both of you as his finger continued to trace around your clit.

“So fucking tight.” He praised, saying it mostly to himself. “Give me one more angel. I know you have it in you.” He was right, the orgasm was already building at a rapid pace. You could feel the tingle of euphoria in the tips of your fingers and toes. You were too strung out on him to answer, but he knew that you would give him what he wanted.

Nobody in their right mind would ever deny Jake anything he asked for, anyway.

“Jake, fuck, m’gonna cum.” You rushed out, the urgency something you had never experienced before in your life. He let out a low chuckle at your state despite feeling the same desperation.

“That’s my girl.” He said again, the statement still hitting as hard as it did the first time he said it. With one last thrust of his hips, you came undone, all of the pleasure from the night coming to one final climax.

Your mind was blank, no thoughts or worries left to bother you. You wanted to scream his name, but nothing was coming out. Your chest ached and your lungs were in dire need of air, but you could not even seem to do something as simple as breathing. Jakes hand pushed your head further into the mattress, your cheek pressed against the soft fabric of the sheets as he started to lose his composure, too. His movements were sloppy, his hips stuttering every time he fucked into you. The finger that was once tracing perfect circles on your clit seemed to forget how to do so, and he had his turn to utter profanities that only solidified the moment in your minds forever.

His grip on your hair loosened as he reached his peak, spilling his release inside you as his hips began to slow. He used his arm to pull you back on him one last time, holding you there while he recovered from the intensity of the moment. He let out a long breath, looking down once more where his hips rested against yours. He drew back, slowly thrusting forward a few more times as he fucked his release back into you. A low growl sounded from his chest, the sight alone nearly working him up all over again.

“You okay, sweetheart?” He asked, his loving and catering tone returning as he withdrew from you completely.

“Yeah, m’okay.” You nodded, feeling the pressure in your skull lessen as he loosened his hold on your hair. “Fantastic, actually.”

“Yeah?” He grinned, excited at the idea. “You feel better?”

“Jake, you have no idea.” You breathed, slowly moving from your position. You were sore, tired, but you felt better than you ever had. “I don’t think I’ve ever… no, I’ve never had sex like that.” You confessed, rolling on to your back to let your body rest for a moment.

“I’m glad I could help, beautiful.” He said, laying down beside you. “Don’t worry about the mess, I’ll clean it up later.” He said, pulling you into his arms. You rested your head on his chest, his skin warm and soothing as the sound of his heartbeat thudded in your ears.

“I should probably call a cab, get back to Josh’s place before the bar rush starts.” You sighed, saddened by the thought alone. You wished to stay wrapped up in Jake’s arms for the rest of the night, even if you knew you shouldn’t. You were going through a breakup, and dating was not on the table (or shouldn’t be, at least), but there was something special about Jake, something so different that it made it impossible to want to walk away from him.

“Are you crazy?” He scoffed, his tone light as he looked down at you.

“What?” You raised an eyebrow, tilting your head up as you awaited an answer.

“Like I’d ever make you take a cab.” He rolled his eyes. “But, you’re not going back to Josh’s place, sweetheart.”

“What if I want to?” You shot back.

“Do you?” He asked, seemingly staring into your soul. You bit the inside of your lip, fighting back a smile as you gave a small shake of your head. “Didn’t think so. I’ll just tell him we drank a little too much and you crashed in the spare room.” Your stomach sank at the thought of a spare room, but he could see it in your eyes before you had the chance to address it. “You’re not actually staying in the spare room, gorgeous.”

“Okay, good.” You breathed, chuckling at your own stupidity. “‘Cause I’d much rather stay here, with you.”

“That was never even a question.” He assured you, letting his fingers gently trail over your back. The light tickle was addicting, comforting and soft. It was exactly what you needed after such a high energy evening. “I’m not even close to being done with you yet.” He said the second part, quieter this time, but you could still sense the truth behind his words.

“No?” You giggled, smiling up at his pretty face.

“Mmm,” he hummed to himself, the sound vibrating his chest. He seemed like he was thinking about all of the possibilities the night held, everything he could do with you (or to you, for that matter), and more importantly, what positions he could put you in. “No, definitely not.”

“I wouldn’t be opposed to that.” You let out a sigh of content, already dreaming of the same things. A silence fell between you for a moment, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. With Jake, it never was. After a while, you felt the urge to speak again, to show your gratitude for his kindness. “Thank you, Jake. For everything.” You whispered. “It really helped.” His lips quirked into a smile as he pulled you closer to him. He leaned down, placing a soft kiss on the top of your head.

“I’m glad I could help, sweetheart.” He muttered, his lips still pressed against your hair. “And please, if you ever need help forgetting about anything at all, just give me a call. I’d love to help you out.”

[littlemisslipbalm]

Demonology: Me & My Dog

Series Summary: A new demon has come to Nashville. Josh and Jake's ways of life have been thrown off by her arrival. The angel and demon have lived with an understanding of one another, but with Y/N stirring up trouble and asking questions, they're forced to work out a new normal. And why is she so powerful for a human turned demon anyway, that's unusual, right?

Jake Kiszka x f!reader and Josh Kiszka x f!reader

A/N: This will be at least three parts! This first part is more about Josh and the reader, the second will be more Jake and then we will see with part 3 what is to happen. Please let me know what you think with comments and reblogs and messages to my inbox!! I want to talk about this bc I have been so excited to share it!!

Word Count: 5.4k | Warnings: alcohol consumption, strong language, allusions to sex - minor descriptions of sex but not descriptive smut (still 18+!!), dubious comprehension of angel/demon mythology, like this is fiction fr so if it does not make sense i am sorry but idc (but am also open to suggestions thx)

Join Taglist

Part 1: My & My Dog

When being told to stir up some trouble on Earth, Y/N was more annoyed that she had to go back at all than excited that she was moving up in the ranks. Afterall, she’d only died 50 years ago. It was already time to go back? She thought she had eternity down here. 

From what she’d heard from other members of the underworld, it’d just gotten worse since she’d left. Prior to 1976 had been a riot for her (1976 was not her favorite, but dying usually wasn’t in people’s top ten greatest moments), but now it sounds worse than Hell itself.  

Still, like a good little demon soldier, she trudged through the dim back rooms to find the dull office that would provide her with the necessary documents to take a corporeal form and inhabit the physical sphere for an extended period of time. 

“Can I bring my dog?” She asks, kicking at a piece of garbage on the floor. It littered the entire ground around her feet. 

“Dog?” The servant of hell inquired. 

“Chupacabra,” She corrects.

“Sure,” Their eyes raise from filling out the paperwork to the little animal beside her. “Extra form you need to both sign. Says he’ll suck the blood of at least five animals per earthly week while he’s there. We don’t do ESAs here.”  

“Fab,” She sighed in relief and scratched behind the ears of her dog that she had re-encountered shortly after arriving in Hell. 

The chupacabra placed his paw in some mysterious blood that had formed in the pewter catch-all dish sitting beside the papers and then pushed it onto the form. Signed, sealed and soon to be delivered. They were getting out of Hell. 

-

When she materialized on Earth, she wasn’t sure where she was exactly. The home office didn’t give that information, you just had to figure it out yourself. She had been hoping for her hometown of Los Angeles or another major city center she’d never been to before. Maybe London or Tokyo would be a fun change of pace. 

After walking what felt like 20 miles, but was probably half of that given that she wasn’t used to physical legs anymore, she came upon a sign as to where she was. A mural to be exact. 

It had only been woods and fields for the first half, but then there were more buildings. Coffee shops, bagel shops and something that was called a ‘Vape’ shops. Everything advertised themselves as historic music sites. But it wasn’t until 1504 Demonbreun St. that she fully ascertained she was in the heart of Nashville, Tennessee. 

“Welcome to Nashville”

“Fuck yeah,” She smiled. A friend back in the day had been from here and told her about it a few times. It wasn’t a major capital city or home, but it was a city alright. And where there was nightlife, she was sure there could be trouble. 

She spent the rest of the day checking around her surroundings. Finding the place Hell had given her to lodge in. It wasn’t much but she remembered earthly delights and planned to spruce it up, give it a vibe. She wrote a note on the wall with a deep red pen she had brought with her a list of items she needed. Couch, rug, bed, posters, an electric guitar and lots of wine and clothes. The ink dripped down the wall and she smiled, swiping at it and placing it to her lips. 

She passed the rest of the daylight hours with great displeasure for the living people around her who barely seemed to notice her. Not that she looked any different than them, but it just bothered her that no one was as friendly as when she’d last been here. No one bothered to say ‘hello’, all they did was stare or talk into their rectangular devices she had realized were portable telephones half way through the day. 

Broadway St. seemed to be the place Y/N thought she’d find the most possible trouble. It was lit up like the Sunset and if it weren’t for all the horribly dressed people surrounding her, she would’ve felt right at home. 

At one of the bars, she got free shots from the bartender with a flash of her eyes. From the regular dark brown iris, they flashed an entire eternal glassy black. He smiled dreamily in the abyss and walked away after she winked at him. She swung back the shots and made her way to the dance floor. 

Raising her hands above her head, she began to dance. Her black lace dress hugged her curves and shifted with her. Her silver jewelry glinted dangerously as she moved. The lights in the bar shifted to stay red instead of the flashing multi-colors that had bothered her when she entered. She moved her hips to the music and slowly it transformed from a poppy song she didn’t know to Led Zeppelin. 

Robert Plant’s voice got everyone dancing the way they should and the vapes transformed into cigarettes and she smiled to herself feeling alive for the first time in a long time. Maybe being back wasn’t so bad. She drank more and danced more and saw people getting drunk and making out in corners and thought debauchery worked as trouble. Job done for the day. 

She relaxed into the sway of the music, writhing around like a snake as her skin grew dewey with perspiration. A tug at her arm brought her out of her euphoric state. All night she had made sure no one would bother her, but whoever this was didn’t seem to follow her rules. 

She opened her eyes, fully black once more as she stared at who was holding her wrist. She tugged back but his hold was secure. He pulled her to the side of the dancefloor, a space conveniently opening up. 

“Get your hands off me! What the fuck, man?”

“You can’t be here,” He spoke calmly. 

She narrowed her eyes at him. He had on a white plain t-shirt and light wash jeans, with opalescent beads hanging around his neck. His eyes were an oddly familiar light brown. His hair was shaved on the sides, creating a sort of mullet that she mildly appreciated if he hadn’t been so rude as to pull her away from her fun. That mullet exposed the golden earrings in his pointy ears. 

There was something different about him. None of it was in his physical form but she felt it, vibrating and extending around him. As if he had invisible light passing around and through him even in the dark dingy bar lighting. 

“Says who?” She finally tugged her arm free from his hold and crossed her arms across her chest, pressing her breasts up in the process. 

His eyes flicker to the movement before pressing his lips into a thin line “Says me.” 

She rolled her eyes, unimpressed. “And you are?” 

“Joshua. I protect this town," he says. He wrings his hands around the gold bracelets on his wrists. “You can’t come into these bars and just mess with everything about them. It’s wrong.” 

“Yes I can, Josh,” She smirks. “I’m a demon as you clearly already can tell. I can do whatever I want.” 

“Oh my God,” Josh sighs, exasperated already. “There’s already a demon here.” He knew the other one quite well and was at least able to keep him in check. A newcomer would mean more work. 

She shrugged. “Not my problem, angel. Hell sent me up here, guess they’re not happy with the other one’s performance.” 

She moved to go back to the bar for another drink when Josh looked like he was a million miles away. He’d really killed her buzz. Josh’s mentioning of another demon made her stop and ask as an afterthought: “What’s this other demon’s name?” 

“Jacob–er, uh, Jake,” Josh corrects himself. He hadn’t gone by Jacob since, well, since before, even if Josh wished he could just call him Jacob. 

“Groovy.” Her smile is wicked, her lips painted a red so deep it resembled dried blood. “Displeasure meeting you, angel. Come find me if you ever want to have a real good time.” She kissed his cheek before disappearing behind a group of people. 

-

Two weeks later, Y/N was seated on a bench in the park with her legs kicked up. She looked like she was a dead body–which more or less, she was, but the way she was sitting was unusual for someone who was supposedly alive. Her dog was perched unnaturally along the backrest, soaking in the sun he had missed. They looked out of place. 

She had come out in the midday to see if she could start any fights in the park. She’d quickly learned that malfunctions with their little handheld phones really upset the modern humans so she liked to mess with wifi and electrical connections every odd day or so just to keep up the no-good work. 

Her black RayBans covered her eyes as they surveyed the green grass for potential targets for a bit of a row. She sat as far away from the people as possible, so she had enhanced her vision as if using a zoom function. But soon something white blocked her vision. 

“Angel,” She practically growled. Her dog actually growled, sitting up. 

“Mind if I sit,” Josh asks pleasantly, eyeing the dog with caution. It looked like a normal dog, but a clip in his right ear and a strange red shimmer in his eyes made Josh think there might be something hellish about him. 

She took her feet off the bench and pushed her sunglasses up off of her face. “Finally want a taste of what you’re missing?” 

“No,” he states flatly. His eyes were still wandering between the creature and the demon. She was dressed in all black, typical. The dog was between cream and the lightest brown he’d ever seen, atypical. “Is this your dog?” 

“Yeah.” She smiles softly for the first time. Her hand goes to pet him between his ears and down his small snout. “He was waiting for me in Hell back’n the day. They made him a chupacabra for me as a ‘Welcome to Hell’ present.” 

Josh’s eyes widened in surprise. What had she done in life to receive a present in Hell? “They like you down there?” 

“Eh…I think I’m just a descendant of many a troublemaker. They knew I’d be an asset, especially when I arrived so early.” 

Her dog slipped into her lap. For a moment, he shifted as he stared at Josh. Big ruby eyes glowered at him, all his hair was gone, leaving something more resembling a pale soft dog-rat. Disturbing and wretched, nonetheless. He wrinkled his nose at Josh. 

Josh tried to smile, feeling awkward. Jake had insisted he find this demon Josh had encountered, needing more information about whether he was really in trouble or if it was procedural. Why Jake wouldn’t do it himself, Josh never got as many answers as questions he asked. 

“Do either of you have names?” 

She grinned. “Is this twenty questions? Why so interested in me?” 

“Just want to get to know my opposition,” Josh says lightly, praying for her to feel extra kind today. Afterall, she was a demon who was originally human and it was only a little while ago from what she seemed to like. He was pretty sure she’d only been down in Hell for 50-60 years, that was barely a human lifetime—and yet it was longer than hers. Far less than Jake. Maybe he could neutralize her, get her to see the bright side. 

“His name is Rune, now, but it used to be Rori.” She rubs over the dog’s hair, happy that he was softer on Earth. “He responds to both–for me. Not sure what he should be called now we’re back.” 

Josh waited patiently. The breeze was cooler than usual and looking at her, he had to assume it was her as well. She seemed far too powerful for a run-of-the-mill demon who used to be human. But she also seemed extremely unlikely to answer his questions if he got too personal. 

With her eyes uncovered, Josh watched them move around as she thought about something. It was almost like she was tracking something or doing some long form math equation in her head. Like she didn’t know what her name was and was looking for the answer. 

“Mine…well, now you can call me Sal.” She winks and Josh straightens in his seat, feeling strange. “Gonna write about me in your diary now, Joshua?” 

Josh pretends to laugh with a clipped “ha ha.” She smirked again, sliding closer to Josh on the bench. Rori grew annoyed and hopped off her lap, slinking off to climb a tree in hopes of finding a squirrel. Sal extended a delicate hand to Josh’s shoulder, beginning to play with the fabric of his shirt. He smiled tightly, not having anywhere to go if he wanted more answers. 

“You said you arrived early?” Josh’s voice is high as he feels her touch moving down his arm. Thankfully, being an angel kept him from feeling her entire influence, but her physical touch was enough to feel something…unholy. He didn’t want to imagine her abilities on mortals. “What did you mean?” 

“You’re fun,” She beamed. “If I show you some tricks I picked up in Hell, will you show me something?” 

“It depends what you want to see,” Josh tries to be diplomatic. 

Her head throws back in laughter. “Not that. No, I want you to want me to see that.” Her hand wanders to his wrist and toys with the bracelet before slinking to his thigh. Her voice was low and sultry, lips pressed to his ear. “Desperately.” 

Josh was starting to feel like he might have to leave. His breathing had turned shallow and he couldn’t stop staring at the carnelian stone hanging between her breasts. Her hand’s touch left him and she laughed again bringing him out of his reverie. 

“Hell, you’re pretty cute…I was a 27 club member.” She shrugged, turning away from Josh to stare out at the people again. “Had my heyday in the late 60s/early 70s and went out the same way I lived. Fast.” 

Josh thought about the 60s and the 70s. He’d admit those decades were a bit of a guilty pleasure for him. Nashville had been fun, not as crowded. He watched her again, seeing her eyes narrow looking at the couples and the groups of friends. 

“You weren’t from here?” 

“LA. Broadway’s kinda like the Sunset Strip, just a bit more loser-y…NashVegas, just like Liv said.” 

Josh was about to protest, but refrained, letting her reminisce. She did miss her friends from back then. They’d gotten up to so much trouble. Sometimes too much. 

“Best of times, worst of times kind of thing y’a dig?” She tapped the heel of her boot like she was trying to shake off something unpleasant. “Just glad I had my dog for most of the time. He followed me everywhere and everyone’d let ‘im in because he was such a doll. Died ‘bout three years ‘fore me.”

The more she spoke the more her accent of a bygone era of California popped up. Josh couldn’t deny how sweet she sounded when she spoke about that thing, demonic as the pair of them were. 

“How long’ve you’ve been up–er, down here?” She asked, barely realizing she had to correct for him. 

Josh cast his eyes to the sky, thinking. “Since the beginning. That’s like, 8000 human years, I believe.” 

“Get the fuck outta town!” She exclaimed, jumping in her seat to face him. Her eyes were alight with hellfire. “You’re a proper angel then?” 

Josh chuckled. “They don’t really take new hires upstairs, I’m afraid. Only very special occasions. It doesn’t happen much these days.” 

She regarded him for a moment, inventorizing him again now that she deemed him far more interesting than before. “Yeah, I was on a special list when I came down. Only a few others in my line, everyone else had to wait in this huge waiting room. It was…repulsive and I’ve been in the alley behind the Whisky.” 

Josh tilted his head, looking over her once more. He felt like he should know her, but he couldn’t understand from where. She looked so familiar. Her hair seemed to shift every so often and he couldn’t be sure if it was the light or mood dependent. He didn’t prod at her mentioning the special treatment in Hell, didn’t want to alert her to the fact, that from what he knew, that was extremely rare.

“Have you told your demon friend about me yet?” She asked.

“He’s not my friend,” Josh responds automatically. 

Her eyebrows raise as she turns her head back to him, scanning him for understanding. A killer upon its prey. 

“Secret lover?” She guesses. 

Josh can’t hide his face of disgust. “Jesus! No!”

“Homophobic?” She asks with a look of distaste. Not being for the gays was so not groovy. Half the musicians she hung out with back in the day were gay. And she wasn’t one for choosing when it came to sexuality. 

“No!” Josh cries. “I am more than an ally to that cause, not that angels really have sexualities…it’s just.” He sighs, rubbing at his neck confusion. “He was, is–I don’t know, my twin.” 

“Oh!” She beams, eyes once again lighting up in intrigue. She enjoyed learning things, it helped for using it against people at the end of the day. “So he’s also a proper demon. Fell and all that.” 

“Yeah, don’t remind me.” He sounded pained, as if he was reliving the entire thing. 

“Wow…” She blows out a breath. “That must be funky.” 

She continued when Josh said nothing. “Y’know ‘cause he’s your brother but also he’s–” She finished her statement by sticking her pointer fingers through her hair and wiggling them around. 

“Yes, I am aware.” Josh shakes his head. 

She stood up and stretched her arms over her head, revealing her stomach below the flowy lace top she was wearing. “Great catch up, I guess, angel. Wanna trade tricks later? I’ve already worked through most of the main bars here and I’m getting bored.” Nothing was keeping her interest, since every place she had to transform into her liking. 

“You want to hang out with me? You want to hang out with an angel?” 

She grinned, turning around herself once before dropping her arms and stalking back towards Josh, standing directly in front of him. She leaned over him, watching him straighten his neck and swallow thickly. His eyes flickered from her face to the carnelian again. 

“Everyone else is too easy around here. I need a challenge.” Her lips were right in front of his. “You seem like the perfect remedy for a wayward soul like me.” 

-

Josh wasn’t exactly sure why he agreed to meet the demon at some speakeasy she said she needed to try. He wasn’t fully sold on calling her ‘Sal’, something about it felt off to him. She didn’t even really seem to care for it either. Jake, he knew, was vehement that he wished to be called Jake. 

Jake was probably why he had come to the back door of a pizza joint that was actually the door to the underground speakeasy. He’d asked for more information on her. When Josh had inquired why Jake couldn’t just do it himself, his twin finally fessed up that he was actually not currently in Nashville at all. Leaving the heavy lifting to Josh, like always. 

Begrudgingly, Josh entered another bar with plans to meet a demon. Heaven forgive him. It was smokey inside the brick-walled cavern. Small candles lit the tabletops and narrow bar top. A small dance floor was packed as people danced slowly to a jazz band. In the corner of the room, he saw her hair almost glowing in the dark and he made his way over. 

She was dressed in a black pantsuit, with no undershirt, just a black lace bra and her same necklace. Rori wasn’t present, from what Josh could see, but based on their conversation earlier he had a feeling the demon dog was around, lurking. 

She groaned when she saw what Josh was wearing. 

“Angel, man, do you have any other clothes besides that?” She shook her head in disappointment. 

“Of course I do,” Josh huffed, looking down at his clothes not understanding what was wrong with them. 

“Change.”

“I can’t perform miracles just to change my outfit. That’s wrong.” 

“That’s wrong, it’s wrong,” She parrots what she thought was becoming Josh’s mantra. “God, Heaven sounds so stifling.” She rolled her eyes and snapped her fingers with impatience.

In an instant, Josh was dressed in a red velvet jumpsuit with sequins around the neckline. His arms were on full display, muscles bulging while the velvet hugged his torso and lengthened his height. He smooths at his hair and feels something come off his skin. On his hand, he sees glitter. He looks at her again and then down at his new clothes. She was eyeing the bulge veering to his right thigh. 

“Much better.” She grins. 

Josh rolls his hand in front of him quickly, almost like a benediction, and once again his outfit has changed. Now, he was in a cream and grey jumpsuit that was far less flashy of his own with his favorite sigil emblazoned on the chest. He left the glitter and sat down. 

Her unamused look makes Josh feel a little hot with shame. 

“A little miracle to make sure I don’t look like a demon can be forgiven.” 

“You looked foxy but whatever.” She rolls her eyes and flicks a hand at the table, producing a bottle of red wine for both of them. “You drink, surely. C’mon, don’t act like your demon brother hasn’t corrupted a few of those precious angel feathers.” 

Josh can’t help the smile that falls over his face. Not sure what was so endearing about her at this moment. The romantic jazz might have something to do with it. He loved jazz. He takes the drink gratefully and they sip in companionable silence. She was subdued. 

With one bottle down, they start a second and this is when she offers to show Josh a trick if he’ll show her something again. He shrugs in compliance, feeling well on his way to drunk. 

“But won’t the other people in here see?” He adds. 

“No, they all know to mind their own business. Plus, it’s dark in here.” She winks and suddenly Josh is staring at only her head. 

He can seriously only see her head and neck. She moves closer to him and now Josh is certain, she’s made her body disappear. She was a dishonest-to-god floating head. Her head glowed gold for a moment as she twirled in a complete 360 to really show herself off. Josh’s eyes were as wide as possible trying not to cry out in amazement. Then the rest of her body reappeared, straddling Josh’s lap. With her arms draped over his shoulder, her all black soulless eyes gazed into Josh’s, practically paralyzing him with her fiery warmth and intensity. 

“So what do you think, angel?” 

“I, uh,” Josh stuttered. He placed his hands firmly on her hips and moved her off of him. “That’s impressive. What’s it good for?” 

“S just fun,” She shrugged, undetered by Josh removing her from his lap. “Let’s dance and then you can show me your wings or something.” 

Josh didn’t have time to protest, as she grabbed his wrist with one hand and their second bottle of pinot noir in the other. 

She took a swig before letting it float in the air beside them. Her body swiveled around the dance floor, placing herself in Josh’s arms as he swayed respectfully. She sighed and sunk into the movement, drinking from the bottle every so often. When the song changed, she turned to face Josh, handing the wine to him. He drank obediently, which she felt was a triumph. 

Hands draped over his shoulders again, she pressed her body against his. He was strong, she could feel his toned stomach. Her regular eyes met his and she tipped her nose against his. He looked stoicly back at her, determined to be friendly but not fall into the trap she was so clearly laying for him. 

“You’ve got so many defenses up,” She whispers. “Why not do what you want for once? Loosen up. Indulge.” 

Josh smiles down at her and moves his lips to her ear. Polite as ever, he speaks soothingly. “I am having a lovely time with you, Sal.”

She groans, pressing his hands to her hips again, where the curve of her ass was. “I can gaurantee you’ve never had what I’m offering you…” 

Josh smiles knowingly, unconvinced. “I’m afraid I’m above your temptations. Is seduction your main area of expertise?” 

She glares at him, but there’s a glint in her eye. She loved the chase. The difficulty. 

“Debauchery in general, but with how many people wanted to have sex with me in my first life I have a specialization in seduction and desire.” 

He shrugs, moving his hands to a respectful place on her waist. His touch is light, but she feels the pressure of his thumbs pushing at the exposed skin. She smirks and snakes her lips up to his ear. 

The gold hoop glints and she flicks her tongue over it. “I could just show you what you’re missing. If you’d allow me to put it in your mind, we wouldn’t actually do it. You’d be in complete control. Halo intact. C’mon just a few images…it’ll be informative.” 

Josh sighs as the tug of her teeth on his earring. She was bad. Terribly good at her job. He understood why she was here. Jake wasn’t even in town. Damn him. If he did his job a little better, Josh wouldn’t be contemplating allowing a demon into even a small recess of his mind. But, Jesus, did he want to just see it. If it wasn’t real, it wasn’t really a sin to indulge. 

She stares at him, waiting for his response. Her hands run over his shoulders and chest. The music swells and Josh’s hands tighten on her waist as he looks up to the ceiling, praying for forgiveness. 

“For educational purposes,” He starts and she grins. “I will allow you to show me how you do your job. So that I may be able to thwart your wrongdoings better.” 

“It’s just a little sex,” She licks her lips. “Igniting passion in people makes more babies for you to teach heavenly values or whatever. God likes sex, Josh.” Her voice is sickening, it was like she was dripping in a delicious scent that Josh can’t get out of his head. Twisting his values and her intentions into something evil that somehow made wicked sense.

He’s been careful to only open up a small piece he knows he can close, but he almost loses his footing when he finally feels her stinging lips on his. She licks into his mouth and he’s about to protest before the images begin to flow through his mind. 

‘Good thing your brother doesn’t have to transfer information like this, huh?’ Sal says within Josh’s mind. 

Guiltily, he feels himself laughing. Though his physical body is still locking lips with her. 

The room she brings him to in his mind is dark, a red lamp in the corner where two bodies are rolling around. Sighs of ecstasy filling his ears. The smell of sex hanging in his nose.

‘You’re really missing out, angel. Could show you the best thing life, and death, has to offer.’ Her voice is softer in his mind. 

The scene changes. He’s staring up at her above him. Her hips are working over him steadily as her naked breasts bounce in front of him, her necklace is the glowing light now. Her voice is sinful as she moans praises for Josh. How good he feels, how big he is, how strong he is. The scene changes and he’s driving into her with her legs over his shoulders, she’s smiling sweetly up at him with her mouth open, repeating his name like a prayer. It shifts and she’s pressed face down in the grey silk pillows, her body spread out for him as he grunts and growls, thrusting ceremoniously into her as she screams for him to keep going. It’s melodic, every bodily sound and the scene of their physical bodies uniting is hypnotic. Like it was pre-ordained that he would fit so well inside her. He feels euphoric as it shifts once more. She is back on top, his hips press up into her as she grinds down. Their faces are pressed together as Josh holds her body close to him. Arms enveloping her fragile frame. The room is quiet as they are pressed skin to skin, her lips meeting his gently. Sharp gasps escape their trembling lips.

‘Okay, enough,’ Josh pushes away from the scene, feeling both aroused and confused. 

In the speakeasy, she pulls back from the kiss with a wipe of her lips. She runs her hands through her hair as she watches Josh. She had shown him every one of his fantasies, placing herself at the center of them. They weren’t particularly raunchy, it was all about connection to him and for once she didn’t tease. 

“I like you, Joshua,” She says, truthfully, allowing him to pull their bodies a little apart. 

He was flustered and confused and embarrassed, but he also didn’t want to run. She had kept her word, shown him a few things and left. He didn’t fully understand the words she had just spoken.

He shakes his head, an awkward smile on his lips there on accident, and she stares at him wistfully. 

“I haven’t had someone in my mind in a very long time.” 

“It’s okay,” She soothes. “You really are an angel. Maybe on this earthly plane for too long since you clearly have carnal desires, but they were sweet. Every man’s mind I’ve looked into had vile and cruel desires…” She paused, looking past Josh. “Even in my first life, all the men I knew wanted to hurt the women they supposedly loved.” 

Josh’s eyebrows shot up in shock. 

“The closest you got to dirty was having me in do–”

“Okay!” Josh cut her off. “I think it’s time to call it a night.” He turned and walked swiftly through the crowd, parting easily for him–definitely not a misuse of his miracles. 

“Fine,” She grinned wickedly and whistled for Rori, sauntering after Josh. 

Back on the street, it could’ve been daytime with all the lights compared to the speakeasy. She squinted her eyes in distaste, thriving in the dark and wishing she had brought her sunglasses.

Josh was turned away from her so she tapped on his shoulder, wanting his attention. Wanting to see him again. He turned slowly and the look on his cherubic face was troubled. She frowned, about to ask what got his wings in a twist. 

A shadow stepped into Josh’s light. His hair was long and messy, in need of a wash. His silver jewelry shined heavy on his tanned chest. His black button up was almost completely open exposing his torso and he held a wide-brimmed black hat loosely in one hand and a guitar case more carefully in the other. His eyes flashed yellow when he spotted Y/N.  

She straightened her posture under his gaze and gave him a defiant look. Rori growled, but stayed behind her legs. 

Jake ran his tongue over his bottom lip, taking in the woman shaped devil before him. “You must be the new demon in town.” 

She tilted her head at him and looked between Josh and Jake. “And you must be your brother’s keeper.” 

He took a menacing step closer, narrowing his eyes at his angel of a brother before returning his gaze to her. “Something like that. Now, farewell…or don’t, I don’t care.”

She opened her mouth to speak again but no sound came out. 

His eyes flashed again as he turned on his heel and said tersely, a command, “Josh.”

The pair disappeared into fog that had appeared as suddenly as the older demon along the nighttime sidewalk and then she watched it dissipate moments later, leaving no trace of the creatures. The men. The angel and the demon.

-

to be continued... join the taglist

[samkiszkasfacialhair]

Rollin' and Tumblin' Chapter 3

Rollin’ and Tumblin’ Chapter 3

Masterpost

Pairing: Jake Kiszka and Female Reader

Summary: You’ve lived a sheltered and privileged life, only learning what it truly means to live and love after meeting Jake, a young man of unusual western sorts who was hired to work on your father’s farm.

Warnings: Thoughts of dying/death, female masturbation, touching, fingering.

Word Count: 4.2k

It rained that spring for weeks, leaving you inside and away from Jake for a while. By the time the rain finally stopped, it was mid June and Jake had a lot of work to do. He had to undo the damage the rain caused, so he was incredibly busy. 

From the library window above, you watched Jake. He worked tirelessly each day with the other men on the farm. Jake was first in command under your father. He followed his orders, went over plans with him, and instructed the other men on what to do and how to do it. Just by watching him you could tell he had experience with this kind of work. Like he’d been doing it his whole life. 

Jake concentrated hard on the job but every now and again, he’d catch you in the window and when no one was looking, he’d smile up at you for a second or two before returning to work. 

But those smiles every now and again weren’t nearly enough. The desire to see him again and to kiss him again was burning within you. And that wasn’t even what was burning inside you the most. For the first time in your life, you felt feelings of lust and passion. At night, you began exploring your body on your own, discovering things that made you feel a way you had never felt before and seeing how far you could take them. 

You imagined the hands roaming your body were Jake’s instead of your own.

You wished the things you were doing to yourself could be done by him. 

You prayed to God to forgive you for what you’d just done but to also give you a chance to have Jake do it to you. 

You needed to see him and kiss him. You needed to feel him. But most of all you needed him to feel you. 

Finally, one day, after all the imaging, wishing, and praying- your chance to make your thoughts a reality arrived.

It was the hottest day of the year so far, the Tennessee sun was high in the cloudless sky, burning down on the world below. The April rain and the May sun brought some much needed color to the world. By June, the grass had sprung to life with a vibrant shade of green, flowers of every color had bloomed, and leaves covered every tree, filling the air with a fresh scent.

All the windows in your house were open but the only place that provided slight relief from the heat was the swing underneath the maple tree in your backyard. It was shaded and every now and again, a breeze would swing by, cooling you down. Not to mention, it placed you near Jake, allowing you to exchange looks and smiles much closer than you would have if you were inside the house.

As usual, you and Jake exchanged smiles but this time he would test the boundaries, walking close to the swing every now and then, hiding a smile, and acting as if he barely knew you. 

That day, you wore a pale yellow dress, your favorite by far. It had short sleeves, lace detailing, and it was pretty lightweight compared to all your other dresses, which was quite necessary considering how hot it was. Not to mention, the lack of corset felt incredibly freeing.

With an embroidery frame in your lap, you sewed and hummed mindlessly to yourself when the sound of your Jake’s voice calling out broke through the air and caught your attention.

“Alright, boys, Boss’ orders-  go on home now, it’s too hot to be workin’ like this!” he called out to the men on the farm as you turned to see your father walking back toward your house.

The sun in the sky was off to the west just a bit, it was only the early afternoon. There was plenty of time left in the work day and despite the heat, you were surprised to see your father put an end to the day so soon when there was still heapings of work to be done.

Regardless, Father headed inside and shortly after, one by one, each worker began heading out. All but one. 

Jake was stalling around the barn and on the fields on purpose, inspecting crops and tinkering with tools in the most unnecessary of ways. All of which made you giggle and Jake knew it. 

After some time, everyone was completely gone and Jake began to approach you. As he walked up the dirt path from the fields, he peered over his shoulders and looked past you to your house to make sure no one was around and no one was watching.

You could feel your heart racing and those butterflies fluttering around in your stomach once more as he got closer. 

Your eyes scanned his body up and down. He had on his usual jeans and boots, and the shirt he wore was unbuttoned most of the way down. However the work day left him soaking in sweat and with dirt of all sorts covering his clothes and face. 

“It’s hot,” he said, wincing, into the sunlight.

He kept a serious face and a casual tone.

“Yes, it is,” you replied just as casually.

Both of you knew you had to be particularly careful being so close to your house. However, you were facing the empty fields with your back to your home. No one but him could see your face and you were thankful for that because you couldn’t help but smile at him.

In fact, it seemed that you had the same effect on him. His straight face started to break and he lowered his head to hide it under the brim of his hat. Quickly, he regained his composure and brought his head back up, revealing a serious face again. 

“You wanna come cool off with me?” he asked quietly as his eyes moved from your face to your house behind you.

You gave him the tiniest nod as a reply.

He kept his eyes fixated on your home as he spoke, scanning each open window and not making eye contact with you. His voice dropped to just barely above a whisper as he spoke again.

“Meet me behind the barn in a few minutes. I got an idea."

He tipped the brim of his hat politely and walked away, as if he was just another one of your father’s employees, having a nice and friendly conversation with you. 

You watched him walk away and back down to the barn. Just as he instructed, you waited a few minutes. You gave him time to put on the appearance of leaving for the day just as all the other men did. 

After some time, you rested your embroidery in the grass by the trunk of the tree, gave your house one last look behind you, and headed for the barn to meet Jake.

As you rounded the back corner of the barn, you saw Jake leaning against the wooden wall.

“Excuse me, Sir. Are you waiting for someone?” you asked sweetly in your most flirtatious voice.

At the sound of your voice, he turned his head and flashed you a full smile, the first smile you’d seen from him in weeks that wasn’t in secret or from afar.

A quiet laugh left his mouth and he took a few steps to meet you.

“As a matter of fact, I am. Been waitin’ for a few weeks now,” he replied slyly.

You began walking closer to him and he held his hands out, revealing the wet patches on his shirt and the dirt that covered his hands.

“I’m all sweaty, Darlin,’” he warned.

“I don’t care,” you said, smiling.

Jake grinned and extended an arm out to pull you in by the waist. Your stomach pressed up against his and your face were mere inches from each other, his just a bit higher than yours. 

His smile lit up his face, turning his eyes into two little crescent moons. His teeth gleamed bright like snowy mountain tops. Under layers or dirt and sweat was tan, glowing skin with a light shade of pink covering each cheek.

Jake leaned down to kiss you softly and it was like the first time all over again. The feeling of his soft, warm lips on yours lit you up from the inside out. Butterflies flew from your stomach, up to your chest, and manifested themselves into a smile which broke the kiss.

“Missed you,” he whispered.

“Missed you too,”

“Would it be alright if I steal you away again?”

“It would be a pleasure,” you replied sweetly.

“Good, cause I know the perfect spot for today,” he stated.

Jake broke away from you and unhitched Whiskey from a wooden post. He helped you get on her back and he followed behind, giving her a gentle kick to put her in motion.

Whiskey led you down a path in a forest and along the bank of the river. She came to a halt once you reached the reservoir area. It was full and overflowing from all the rain. A waterfall cascaded down a mountain of rocks overhead. The sun shone through the mist of the water, displaying a rainbow of colors in the air. You had never seen anything like it. It was breathtaking. 

Jake got down from Whiskey and then helped you down. He pulled some carrots out of a bag that hung off her saddle, placed them on the ground for her, and grabbed your hand to lead you to the water. 

You watched him as he stripped himself of his shirt, shoes, and pants, throwing them in a pile near a few rocks and leaving him in nothing but a pair of long cotton underpants. You followed his lead, removing your shoes, dress, petticoat, leaving you in just a pair of short bloomers and a camisole.

Your eyes wandered his half naked body hungrily. The muscles in his back and stomach were modestly toned, forming perfect dips and ridges which began on his chest and continued all the way down to the waistline of his underpants. 

He didn’t look like what you’d imagined in your mind behind your closed bedroom door at night. He looked better.

Jake held out his hand to you and you took it, letting out a breathy laugh and following him out into the water on a path of boulders. 

He walked backwards, holding your hands in his so you could keep your balance on the slippery rocks. 

When you walked out to the last rock in the bunch, the mist from the falls began cooling you off by slightly wetting your hair and what was left of your clothes. 

In a flash, Jake let go of your hand and threw himself into the river with a “Wooh,” leaving behind only a splash when his body hit the water, which quickly faded into the darkness of the river.

A few seconds later, his head was exposed to the air once more when it reached the surface. He pushed his now wet hair out of his face and wiped his eyes. The sweat and dirt that once covered his body had been washed away by the river water, leaving him clean and practically sparkling in the sunlight.

“Come on in, Darlin’! S’nice!” he called over the roaring sound of the falls as he dove back under the water.

“Jake I can't!” you yelled back.

“Whaddya mean  you can't? The jump ain't that bad! It’s just water! In this heat you’ll be dry in no time!” 

Jake thought you were worried about getting completely wet and thus potentially getting caught upon your arrival back home. And though that was a partial part of the reason you were hesitant to jump, there was something else.

So you stood there, shaking your head at him and biting your bottom lip. 

“Come on! What are you so afraid of?” he laughed as he swam around and went under for a moment again to get his hair out of his face once more.

“Jake, I-, I can’t…”

“Don’t tell me you don’t know how to swim!” he shouted over the sound of the rapids and the water crashing onto the rocks.

There was no use replying. He already knew the answer. 

He swam closer to the rock you were standing on, extended one arm out of you, and kicked around his feet while he spoke.

“Jump! I’ll catch ya, I promise!” 

You looked down into the water. It was deep and dark. The current was pushing Jake around slightly and he had to keep his legs moving underwater to stay in one place. Below you, waves crashed harshly into the rocks you were standing on, causing the water to turn into white rapids and splash up onto your feet upon the impact. 

For a split second, the thought of death crossed your mind. You figured drowning here would be a nice escape from your mundane life and your inevitable future. Not to mention, dying with Jake by your side at 23 years of age sounded a lot better than living in your own personal hell and dying at an old age next to a man you were forced to marry.

Honestly, the thought was so horrific that before you could even finish it, you jumped.

The coldness of the river chilled you from the inside out the moment you hit the water. Your undergarments soaked up the water, adding extra weight to your body. Being completely surrounded in the dark water with your eyes closed made you feel completely lost, out of your own control, and God knows how far away from Jake. This was it. You were going to die. You were sure of it. 

Once your head broke the surface, you opened your eyes and gasped for air. You weren’t dead but you sure were in heaven. Jake’s face was not even an inch from yours, his hands were wrapped around your waist, and you could hear him talking to you. 

“Hey, hey,” he spoke with a jagged breath as he struggled to hold onto you and keep you afloat, “Shh, I got you. You’re okay. But I need you to kick for me. Come on Darlin,’ kick your legs.”

You nodded and did as he said as you breathed hard and spit out the water that had entered your mouth. He had a tight grip on you and you could feel the pads of his fingertips pressing into your skin more than anything ever had before. You crossed your hands around the back of his neck and tangled your fingers into his wet and already knotted hair.

He stared intently into your eyes and you did the same to him, concentrating on your breathing and movements in the water.

As both of your breathing slowed down, you felt Jake loosen his grip on you and pushed you back just a bit off of him, making you swim on your own.

“Jake, no,” you breathed out, gripping his forearm.

“Don’t panic now. Ain’t nothin’ to be scared of, you got it,” he reassured you, “move your arms in little circles like me, look.”

He let go of you, showed you how to move your arms, and then grabbed you again once he saw you starting to go back down deeper. 

He kept you a float with just one hand holding you up, and slowly, he started to remove that hand from your waist as he saw you able to fend for yourself. 

“There you go, that’s it, see?” 

“I’m doing it,” you said breathlessly, smiling at him proudly.

You kicked your legs and flapped your arms so hard that you had moved yourself to a shallower spot and before you knew it, you felt the earth under your feet and stood up. 

The water came just up to you just below your chest and up to Jake’s waist. 

You let out sigh of relief now that you could relax a little.

“There, now you know how to swim,” he said with a charming smile. 

You giggled at him and he smiled again. This time, time seemed to have frozen as you caught sight of his smile. It was that same full toothed smile that you absolutely adored with those two soft lips that perfectly fit on top of yours. You stared at them for a moment.

The desperate desire for Jake within you burned more with every passing second and came to a peak right there. So much so that in seconds, your lips met his with a crash.

Jake’s hands found your waist again, digging into your body just as they did when he was keeping you afloat. Your hands found his neck again, only this time, you reached your hand up to grab the roots of his hair at the nape of his neck and gripped them tightly, tugging at them just a bit.

He kissed you over and over, each time, deepening his kisses.

The hands that were once holding your waist tightly were now back in the water. Jake reached down and grabbed the back of your legs just where the hem of your bloomers would normally rest and pulled one of your thighs over his hip. 

“Touch me, Jake,” you whispered into his mouth in between kisses. 

Just as you said, he kept one hand on your thigh, but the other, which was once holding your waist, snaked up your ribcage to cup and massage your breast gently.

His hands were big, rough, and warm in contrast to the cool water.

A sigh of pleasure escaped your lungs at the sensation of his touch. 

His lips detached from your mouth and began working just below your ear. His lips and his tongue in comparison to the water were like fire and ice. 

The hand that was once cupping your breast snuck down between your bodies, past the waistband of your shorts, and rested right over where you had been wanting him the most. 

“Please,” you desperately begged in a whisper.

Once he got your approval, you felt the warmness of his fingers slowly ease inside of you. 

With his mouth still on your neck, you felt the corners of his lips turn up into a smile, “Like velvet,” he whispered.

You threw your head back at the feeling of his warm breath on your neck and his fingers inside you as he began pumping them in and out of you slowly, curving them slightly. 

That familiar feeling was building up inside you. You’d felt it many times the past few weeks. The only difference being this time, instead of the pleasure coming from your hand, it was coming from Jake’s. And thank God it was.

He picked up some speed and pressure and with just one press of the pad of his thumb to that one spot, that one particular little spot you'd played around with the most- it hit you.

An intense wave of pleasure washed over you instantly. You closed your eyes and opened your mouth to release the whimpers and moans that you had been choking down and fighting back in your bedroom for the past month and a half. You held onto the feeling for as long as you could and Jake did what he could to help prolong it. But after what felt like just a few seconds, the feeling slowly faded away and Jake slowed down the movements of his hand and fingers, leaving you breathless.

You opened your eyes again as both of Jake’s hands returned to your waist underwater. He lowered your leg off his hip so you were standing on two feet now.

He pushed your hair over your shoulder and held onto the sides of your face gently. 

The two of you stood there for a bit, just looking into each others eyes in amazement when Jake broke first and started to giggle. 

You reciprocated his laughter and gave him a soft kiss, mostly kissing his teeth.

He broke away from you and whispered, “Come on,” as he threw himself back into the water and began swimming again. 

You spent the next few hours with Jake in the river. The two of you continued swimming and eventually ventured out of the deeper areas and into the shallow areas. Holding hands, you walked through it, splashing through schools of minnows and stopping on the bank to watch a mother duck care for her babies. 

The sun started lowering itself behind the trees and you both began shivering as the heat from the sun had become hidden behind the trees, reminding you that it had been some time and it was getting late. You had to be home soon. William was set to arrive to pick you up to have dinner with his family shortly. 

The trek back to where you started was quite long. Jake led you back past the waterfall, over the rocks, and back to where Whiskey was waiting patiently in the grass next to a pile of both of your disregarded clothing.

The two of you removed your wet clothing and put your dry ones back on, hiding the fact that you were trying to catch glimpses of each other’s bodies sneakily. Jake of course, stayed respectful and truly looked away as you got dressed. You however, didn’t and Jake smiled and shook his head as he took his wet underpants off and put his dry jeans on.

Jake shoved his wet underpants into the satchel on Whiskey’s saddle and held his hand out to you for you to hand him yours.

You fought back an embarrassed smile as he took them and you watched him do the same as he gently placed yours on top of his in the bag and fastened the buckle of the front flap. 

With both your hair still wet, you rode back home on Whiskey. Jake sat in front and guided her while you sat behind him with your hands wrapped around his stomach and your chin resting over his shoulder, giving the side of his head little kisses every now and again. 

Back behind the barn, you got off Whiskey to bid Jake goodbye.

He held you close and kissed your forehead before pulling back.

His eyes didn’t have the same sparkle they had earlier in the day. There was a slight hint of sadness in them as it came time to part ways, unsure when you’d see each other again.

“Why can’t I have you?” you whispered longingly as you reached a hand up to comb his hair out of his face.

Jake shrugged and shook his head as if he didn’t have an answer to your question, even though he did. You both did.

The truth was, you were from different worlds. Your world was full of lavish houses, clothing, jewelry, and parties. His world was full of… nothing.

You hung your head and fought back tears.

Jake lifted your chin with his knuckle and looked deep into your eyes.

“You do have me. I’m right here. I ain’t goin’ nowhere,” he reassured you. 

You nodded wordlessly and gave him the tiniest smile. 

He was right. You did have him. For now anyway. 

After a few more kisses, you bid Jake goodnight and headed back for your house.

Surprisingly, you made it back inside unseen and were just on your way to the stairs when the sight of your fiancé in the entryway made you freeze. 

The look of shock took over his face when he saw you in dirty, wrinkled clothing with wet, tangled hair. You smiled politely at him and before he could question your appearance, you spoke.

“I just need a moment. I’ll be down shortly,” you said in your most polite voice, flashing him a fake smile. 

He nodded at you and kept the conversation going as you walked by him and up the steps. 

“I’m delighted for you to meet my family tonight. My mother is quite excited,” he said.

You held onto the railing and walked backward up the steps as he spoke to you.

“Yes, I too am looking forward to it,” you lied as your eyes left his gaze to travel to the window where you caught sight of Jake with his hair dripping wet down his back, leaving through the dirt path on Whiskey. 

William quickly turned his head to look out the window behind him to see what you were looking at where he caught sight of exactly what you did not want him or anyone else to see. 

His head whipped back and forth from you, to Jake, and finally back to you again. 

Instantly, you felt your fake smile drop.

He knew. 

The Adam’s apple on his skinny neck bobbed up and down as he swallowed hard and in a blink of an eye, his polite demeanor changed into something much more demanding and stricter.

“Well you better get ready then. We will be leaving in fifteen minutes and I will not have you looking like… that,” he said with the utmost disgusted look on his face and a sting of anger lingering in his voice, making you feel smaller than ever.

All you could do was nod obediently and head to your bedroom where you would get ready for a night of agony. 

Upon entering, your heart began racing as you took sight of the dress Katherine had chosen for you that night and laid out perfectly on your bed.

Velvet.

Instantly, Jake’s words from earlier played in your head and you sucked in an involuntary gasp. 

You hadn’t even left yet and already, you began counting down the hours until you’d be back home and in your bed, thinking about Jake while you did to yourself what he had done to you that afternoon. 

Author's Note: Sorry this one took so long! I hope it was worth the wait. Thank you for being patient! (Cowboy Sam is coming up in the next chapter so stay tuned!)

Taglist: @writingcold @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @radmads-gvf @iheartjakekiszka @sadandgeek @vanfleeter @cassy-face (Cassy-face it wont let me tag you properly bff idk why) @myownparadise96

[cal-a-bungaa]

The Realm

The Realm Part 7 - Prince!Jake Kiszka

Synopsis: In the heat of danger, love will always conquer

Word count: 4.5k

Warnings: Mentions of death and war, sexual acts and language, descriptions of child birth, swearing and violence. Fluff.

Enjoy (please don't throw things at me) and thank you to the amazing @capturethechaos for reading it over and to @writingcold for your wonderful commentary and help planning this series!!

__________

Jake POV

Jake had stepped foot in this room only once before, the night he agreed to become a married man. It was different from Josh’s- his war room. The walls here were decorated in different weapons that had been favored by the late king, no intricately stitched curtains hanging from the windows. It was bleak, cold and the sense of dread flooded his senses for what’s to come. He could tell how uncomfortable she was being in here; the way she stiffened after seeing the collected layer of dust across the table, dragging the tips of her fingers through it. Whether she liked it or not, she’d best get used to it- they’ll both be in here quite a lot until the enemy is defeated. 

The sunsets rose hues beamed through the arched windows, dusting over her soft skin. Even as Jake stares at her in awe, he cannot help but think of the knife that dangles above her head in the shape of a crown. He even thinks of his brother- how Josh loved the color pink, always opting to sniff the coral tinted roses in his private garden. He’d always sneak them into Jake’s chambers though he was adamant of his distaste towards the sweet scented flowers. Now Jake looks back and wishes that he could rewind and have those damn flowers on his nightstand to fall asleep next to. Or even some to give to the woman before him. The rose bushes his brother hid from the groundskeeper have probably all wilted away by now, no longer having the proper care that they need. 

She was silent by the window, taking in the rolling hills and tall mountains in the distance. The sky's color enhanced the lighter streaks in her hair and the color of her lips. He needed to keep her safe like he wished to with Josh, but now he is sure he will even if it costs him his own life. He would rather a sword pierce his heart than have it shatter all over again. Jake would rather cough up his own blood than to have his hands covered in others that he loves. He leans his hip into the hardwood, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“You’re scared.” Jake says, taking in her figure. Her stiff shoulders, and the way her teeth chew into her bottom lip are dead giveaways of her fear. 

He sees the way she immediately tries to fix her posture. “I am not.” Jake rolls his eyes. 

Jake doesn’t say anything else, opting to approach her from behind. He sees her reflection in the glass, eyes so unsure of what’s to come and what will happen to either of them. It’s clear to him that she doesn’t want him to die, but she’s not ready to die herself. His fingertips run down the expanse of her arm, sending shivers down her spine at the contact. 

“I am a feather disguised as steel…” Jake furrows his brows, confused on why she switched so suddenly. The queen before him has curled back in on herself to be the quiet princess she once was. 

Jake takes hold of her wrist, spinning her towards him. She refuses to meet his eyes, succumbing to the thought that she is weak. He reaches out to slowly lift her chin. “You are steel, not even I can break through,” She shakes her head in disagreement, “Don’t do that. Do not doubt yourself. You are strong if you will yourself to be.”

She shakes his grip off, fuming at his words. “I am sick to death of hearing how strong I am.” The queen before him was fuming and he did not know how to calm her. He believed her to be strong regardless of what he had said in their heated moments. She was nothing close to being a feather. 

If she wished to be a feather then so be it- Jake would take it upon himself to be the steel, but she can be her own if she only believed it so. He couldn’t do anything besides nod and remain silent, not wanting to push the topic. She turns back towards the window, promptly ignoring his remaining presence. The rose sky had darked to a purple, letting the stars shine through and the only light to illuminate the room being the flickering flames of melting candles. He wanted to assure her that she had that strength and bravery hidden within herself, she showed that side to him hours ago. Circling him with his own sword was strength in itself, it was a wonder to him how she could believe such a thing. Jake had placed both palms on the smooth wooden surface of the war table, letting his eyes fall over the map laid out. In the east corner of the map, a strange marking presented itself. Looking closer at it, the name of the landmark had been scratched out with ink. Possibly a fallen kingdom, abandoned fort or village, Jake is not sure. The map that Josh had laid out for the attack on Weria showed no such thing. 

A knock rang through the ever so silent room, her council seconds later piling into the dreary room. It felt as if he was reliving the past. Except for the fact that his brother was not beside him and won’t be again. She’d stepped forward, taking her spot next to Jake. All eyes rested upon her with questions, doubt, and impatience. It angered the king by just their stares, if anyone dared speak a belittling word towards her, they’d be dead on the cold floor instantly. 

She took another step forward, placing her palms on the table as well. “As you all have heard, there is a threat out there that wishes death upon the king and I,” She speaks unwavering. Her pinky stretches out, ever so lightly brushing against his own. “We must put an end to this newfound enemy before more damage to the realm can be done.” 

Jake takes it upon himself to shift his hand closer to hers, pinkies now linked together for everyone to see. He coughs before speaking up, “I will be on the frontlines as that is what I know, I will fight to keep us safe.” he glances over to his queen, seeing a twitch in the corner of her mouth. 

“Your majesties, if I may,” the councilman pauses, “how are we to know where this enemy lies? If we do not know, we cannot plan.”

Jake can tell a condescending tone as if he could see it, he’d grown up around it being a spare but for them to talk to her as such was not something he’d tolerate. “Send units out to scour the woods, search every abandoned building. We could even send parties to this area.” Jake points to the scribbled out lettering. 

All eyes slightly widen at his suggestion. Panic and tension in the room quickly rises when she peels her hand from his. Jake quirks an eyebrow at her, confused on everything that is currently happening. 

“Sir Jake, with all respect, we do not enter that area. It is a place of death and ruin.”

Her touch reappears on the small of his back. He can finally feel her touch through the thin linen drawstring shirt he changed to. Jake wants to return subtle touches, but is too far invested in why that particular area makes everyone spiral into a panic. 

“And with all respect, that is our best option. There must be a reason as to why and how the enemy travels so silently to Weria.” Jake snaps back with a condescending tone of his own. If the councilman could without having his head removed or being thrown in the dungeons, he'd probably laugh at a spare and a queen directing them through a war. 

For a moment Jake thinks he has defeated the council in their fight to reject that idea. “You do not know the land like we do, do not speak as if you do.”

Jake feels her nails sink into the skin of his back, a sign of her irritation. He has to swallow a groan at the pain, but also the shooting ropes of pleasure that travel to his cock. 

“Councilman, you will not speak to your king as such. Mind your mouth.” your king. That has Jake acting out of reflex, reaching around her to place his hand on the small of back, dipping his hand a little too low in a room full of people. 

Looking over at her, he finds her already searching for his eyes. There’s a daring look swirling within them, hypnotizing Jake into pushing it further. At her silent command, his hand slides down the curve of her ass, gripping it tightly- surely enough to leave little bruises. She was his queen even if in this lifetime they were not to be wed. He wanted to feel more of her- more of her touch, for her to feel more of his and to hear the angelic sounds she’d let out beneath him. 

The councilmen all continued on about how that area was off limits and no one should dare enter unless they had a death wish. Jake could see the annoyance on her face, matching his own. “We will send men there and that is final. You best trust your king's word, next time will not be excused.” She threatens. 

With a wave of her hand, they bow their heads and leave. Not a single one of them agreed, but didn’t argue after their queen spoke against them. Jake squeezes the flesh of her ass once more before removing his hand from her all together. He takes steps away from her, examining her as she stands agitated before him because of this war and because he neglects her of what she wants. 

She stares him down, no longer wanting to be the first to make such a daring move. She wanted him to show her how he needed her to want him. But Jake wasn’t going to give it to her so easily.

“Let me show you to your chambers, my queen.” he shoots her a sly grin, lending out his hand for her to take. 

The queen squints her eyes, huffing out a breath. “I think I’ll stay here awhile, thank you.” Jake’s grin grows hearing how disheartened she is at what she takes is his rejection of her.

“Would you rather me ravish you here?” He cocks his head at her. 

A blush spread across her cheeks. Even after clearing her throat, her voice still cracks, “Perhaps I would.”

Jake steps towards her, not yet wanting to be too close to her as he’d give in to his desires. He wanted to make it last- wanted to look at her- to see all of those gorgeous expressions she’ll make when he does touch her. 

“Then tell me what you’d like for me to do.”

She wets her lips, “Love me.”

Jake couldn’t stop himself if he wanted to. In quick strides he wrapped himself around her, letting his heart lead him to the one thing it now called home. His hands encased her cheeks, pushing his lips to hers. Her hands tangle themselves in the fabric of his loose shirt that hides little to the imagination. Jake’s tongue swipes against her bottom lip, wanting to taste more of her. She quickly responds, taking a taste for herself too. Both of them devour each other, taking in everything the other has to give- an outpour of their love. 

“Jake… please.” she whispers against his lips, slick with her saliva. 

He parts from her, seeing the desperation and need in her eyes. He travels on hand from her face to rest on her waist. “You are a queen, do not beg, my love.”

She takes that in, letting it sink in her mind that she has the power over him body and soul. She fully parts from him, lifting herself onto the surface of the table. Jake watches her in awe, seeing how disheveled she is by just sharing a kiss. She no longer simply wants him, she needs him.  His queen teases him, spreading her legs and ever so slowly lifting the hem of her dress to reveal her perfect legs. A few bruises paint her skin, he is sure from the night she spoke about when the cut on her neck was made. 

Jake wishes she would hurry and reveal herself to him, but he appreciates getting to view every little part there is to her. Once she pulls the dress to her thighs, the king sinks to his knees- a forbidden act upon royals. No man or woman that dons a crown may sink to their knees before anyone- not even another royal. Jake would break that absurd law as many times as she would let him. 

His palms smooth over the expanse of her legs, from her calves to her plush thighs. Their final destination are her knees, slightly pushing them apart for him to fit between them. Jake stares into her lustful eyes, giving the inside of her knee a kiss, letting his tongue peak out to wet her skin. He can see the rise and fall of her chest- the way she is trying to not fall apart at the simplest of things. 

Jake rests his head on her thigh, letting himself appreciate the woman that towered over him. “If only you could see what I see- you are so beautiful.”

“I’m quite happy with my view.” She flashes him that smile that he hasn’t seen in far too long. A genuine smile, one that radiates light like his brothers. 

The king lets himself smile back at her, rising back to his feet. Jake feels his desires running wild, needing to calm them down by backing away from what’s tempting him most. Meeting at eye level again, he leans his forehead into hers. His breathing is uneven as is hers. Jake’s eyes close and lifts his head to press a feathery light kiss to the crown of her head. 

“I will not take what is yours from you just yet.”

With that, Jake separates himself from her completely. He watches the way she becomes aware of what he’s said and the shyness he knew hadn’t left her return. She awkwardly shuffles around, fixing herself to look presentable. Dare he say it was quite adorable watching her frantically fix her dress and hair to make it look like treasonous acts hadn’t just taken place in here. New wrinkles had formed in the fabric of her gown and strands of her hair poked out in odd directions. 

“In time, love. I simply wish to give you all of my love before my cock.” The queen's eyes widened in horror at his vulgarity. Her face turned beet red in embarrassment. Jake chuckled.

“Jacob! You mustn't speak like that!” She whisper-yells at him as if anyone was truly listening in on their conversation. 

He releases a belly laugh at her reaction, she truly was so pure. It was as if she wasn’t just hiking up her skirts to reveal herself to him, begging for him to ravish her right on that table. There was still so much to learn about her and he was excited to take this ride with her. 

Jake coughs, letting himself calm down from his fit of laughter. “Let me take you to your chambers.”

She doesn’t respond, still embarrassed. The beautiful girl turns her back and makes her way to the doors that lead to the darkened hallway lined with guards.

_____

You wanted him to take what was yours. The real battle was coming soon and if Jake was to be on the front lines, who knew if he’d make it back to you. You’re scared that you will live the rest of your life without knowing him. You’re more than aware that there is much to make up for before that point, but the way you were testing each other in the war room had you worked up in a way you’d never felt before meeting Jake.

His footsteps echoed your own, but you were far too sheepish to look back at him. You wanted his hand in yours, but without having to ask him brought on a new problem. Jake was watching you, you could feel his eyes burning holes through your dress as you walked. His stare reignited that fire within your core without having to turn back. Just his presence alone was a safety net, one you could fall into and be swallowed whole. You were sure Jake could see the way you clench your fists, bunching up the ruined fabric of your dress. His sole being is enough to have your knees shaking and heart drumming against your chest- he doesn’t have to say a word or lay a single finger upon your skin. 

Guards follow five steps behind Jake, ensuring your safety and his. The amount of guards with you at all times has now been upped by the demand of the king himself, putting his men to work at protecting you. It is not long before the door of your chambers comes into your line of sight. What lurked behind the doors still had you petrified- unable to step one foot in without wanting to search every crevice of the room. Rats lay low, they stay hidden away from the naked eye. You did not want them to reappear and this time have a fatal victory. 

You hesitate to grab the handle to open the doors, not wanting to see what waits for you inside. Slowly you turn your head back to look at Jake who seems more or less unbothered, unaware of your uneasiness. But his actions tell you otherwise, his simple nod for you to open the doors is reassuring. You knew with him around, nothing would harm you. 

The dark room was coated with a sweet scent of roses, the one you found so comforting once upon a time. The moon's light shines ever so brightly through the windows. Your box of memories remains open on the floor, its contents scattered around it. If Jake were to see you’ve kept such ridiculous items, he’d laugh and taunt you for ages. But in the moment you could care less, you needed him with you more than ever. 

You shook your head back at him, speaking to him in silence that you could not enter. “Please stay for the night.” you whisper. 

The corners of his lips turn upwards. “And what would the councilmen think of you inviting me into your chambers?” Jake jests. You knew it was him poking fun, trying to lighten your heavy heart but you simply needed him to watch over you in the night. 

“Jake, I’m not strong- I’m afraid.”

His warmth washes over you, allowing some of your unease to dissipate. “I will not let you be harmed,” His tone has softened greatly. Jake’s hand finds its place on the small of your back, gently ushering you into the room. “I will stay.”

You knew of the rumors that would spread from this, but that is beyond you. As long as you could safely sleep beside the one you wanted most, you’d deal with anything thrown at the two of you. Jake guides you into the darkened room, making haste to shut the door behind him and lighting the candles on your bedside table. 

There’s be many times in the past that you have shared a bed with Jake, but tonight felt different. The two of you have been through so much that it almost felt wrong at this time to even consider reliving these moments. You watched him pace around the room, finding the different sources of light so the dark could not cause any more damage to your mind. It felt so domestic to have him this way. It felt too real- too soon and too calm. 

As Jake goes to light the last candle on its stand, he looks back over his shoulder at you. “You’ll be uncomfortable sleeping in that.” He looks you up and down. 

For the umpteenth time that night a blush rises to your cheeks. He was right of course, but to change before him when he has never seen your body was another challenge that you thought you were ready to face. Bravery was not something you held within you, it was a mere act for people to not look down upon your ruling. Jake didn’t bother turning back to the melted candle, keeping his focus on you. 

“Look away then.” and he does as you wish. 

You reach behind you to untie the corset that secured the dress to your body. Unable to reach the ribbon that lies between your shoulder blades. You huff in annoyance, succumbing to the fact that you will need help to be released from the imprisonment you forced yourself into. 

“Help, please…” you say in a hushed tone. 

It’s as if he were waiting for you to ask for his assistance, whipping around to grab the ribbon and pull it from its knot slowly. His fingertips brush against the skin of your back with each loosening of each crossover. What felt like forever was just a few seconds, he quickly but smoothly made work of the corset. When it was fully undone, the sleeves of your dress dropped, revealing your bare shoulders to him and the crisp night air. 

Before leaving you to strip bare and change, Jake plants a wet kiss on each of your shoulders. Your heart felt like it was going to burst through your chest at his affections. Though he was in your room with you was familiar, there was a shift in the air- something more heartfelt and heavy. Once you feel his gaze leave you, you drop your dress to pool at your feet on the bear skin rug. You step out of the melted fabric and out of the painful heels you donned all day. Your nightgown rested on the back of your desk chair. You slipped it over quickly, afraid of what would happen if Jake were to see you in such a scandalous state- not that he hadn’t earlier, but now would be the time something more was going to happen if it were. 

The small mirror on your desk showed your reflection in it, the way you wore such a remarkable staple on your head while being in a place that you could not hold onto it too tightly without cutting through your palms. You watch it be removed from your body to rest on the grainy old wood, not the best place for it to go but it wasn’t very precious to you. You see the way your styled locks roll down to their rightful place. Being like this made you feel normaal, like a kingdom didn’t lay its lives upon you. You’d wondered if Jake felt the same being in the same position or if it had truly sunk in for him yet. 

“Quit judging yourself, you’re beautiful,” Jake’s voice startles you, having forgotten he was even in the same room. “Come to bed.”

What you would give to hear those words for the remainder of your days was above you. He made it sound like heaven to lay beside him every night and fall asleep to the sound of his steady breathing. On a normal night you’d let the handmaids brush through your hair and scrub you down, but tonight you couldn’t be bothered to look perfect. You wanted him to see you and only you. The real you. 

The way he laid so contently in your bed gave you hope in how this could be your view for eternity. His arms were crossed behind his head, one leg propped up on the other. He looked gorgeous. It’s one of the few times you’ve seen him fully relaxed. His gaze follows you as you approach the opposite side of the bed. You go to lift the layers of blankets only to be beaten to it, Jake peels them back for you. Slithering into bed, he shifts to his side, hand holding his head up and the other reaching to smooth your wild hair. 

No other words are said that night, you can see his lips moving but cannot make out what he’s saying. Your eyes grow heavy and eventually everything around you fades to black. 

_____

You stand in the long hallway of your home, the one that leads to your mother and fathers chambers. Loud painful cries erupt from behind the closed doors. You can see the uneasiness in the guards standing watch and in the castle staff that are gathered outside the room. In the distance, you can recognise the voices from inside the room- you mother and your father, speaking to one another. One was panicked and the other calming and reassuring. Groans of pain come from one of them. 

In a state of panic you race towards the room, shoving those who block your path out of your way. You go to push the doors open only to find you fall right through them. On your hands and knees, you look up to see a terrifying scene. Your mother laid on the grand bed, face as a white as a ghost in a pool of blood with sweat shining on her forehead. Your father held one of her hands in both of his to his mouth, his eyes told you that he was scared. 

Doctors and nurses stood at the foot of the bed between your mothers legs, giving her signs of when she should start again. To your horror, your mothers screams come again but louder now that you have a  front row seat to this gruesome scene. Her body lifts from the pile of pillows that held her weight, squeezing the life from your fathers hand. 

Eventually it all went silent for a moment. A moment of fear washed over all of their faces. The doctor held something you could not see. Your mother had started to cry, tears rolling down her cheeks as she buried her face in your fathers chest. Even his eyes turned red, fearing the worst. But then a shrill cry filled the silent room. 

“It’s a boy your majesties!”

A commotion happens and you see that eventually your mother takes hold of the babe, cradling him in her arms. She looked at him with such adoration. She used to look at you that same way. 

“Well, hello there Prince Daniel.” The first born son of Weria and the first of his name.

__________

Taglist: @allieisacrybaby @writingcold @gardensgatedaisy @hayley1623 @gretasmokerising @josh-iamyour-mama @ageofsinners @capturethechaos @takenbythemadness @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @mysticaldonutglitter @lvnterninthenight

[wildbluesorbit]

Wounded IIS || JTK

…a continuation of London

18+mndi

paring: Jake!reader(f)

LONDON MASTERLIST

A/N: I hadn’t noticed until later that the last 2k words of Wounded II cut off. It isn’t much but it’s plot so without further ado, here’s the last scene. Please let me know what you think !!

Content Warnings || mentions of a toxic relationship & night terrors, pillow talk, previously said boner lol

Word Count || 2k

– YOU –

His warmth cores against your back and bakes through the rest of your limbs. You readjust to try and let some of the cool night air ventilate between your warming bodies, but Jake only moves with you, tucking you further into him.

“Jake,” you whisper to no one conscious.

He doesn’t budge. You wait for panic to pour into the room. But it never does. The need to squirm away from Jake’s touch never forces itself on you. Instead, you linger, daring to defy your limits.

You melt back into his embrace and keep the tempo of his rhythmic breathing, huffing against the shell of your ear.

In the past year, Jake has thoroughly sunk under your skin, and it finally resonates this whole time you had been missing your best friend.

You turn your head to view the moonlight pouring in through the window, catching Jake’s cheek and nose and relaxed pout. You swear he’s never looked this serene. You almost want to unpack and settle your life here; to pin the moonbeam in its place to see Jake at such a still in the light’s beauty all the time.

That is until he grinds his hips against your backside, revealing his hard-on pressing into your flesh. Again to your surprise, you find yourself pressing into the sensation. For this small second, you allow yourself to enjoy laying with him, especially because you aren’t ready for anything further.

“Jake,” you place your hand over his and squeeze.

He slightly stirs until you whisper his name again. Taking advantage of his new privilege, he cranes his head down to featherly press a pucker against your shoulder, angling his hips to where you aren’t being prodded any longer.

His sleep-coated voice rasps against your skin, “Are you okay? Why aren’t you sleeping?”

You whisper to ease him out of his freshly awoken state, “Why are you back so soon? You aren’t supposed to know I sleep in here.”

“I’ve known since the first time you were home alone,” you feel his sleepy smirk stretch across your skin as he revisits a memory you do not share, “I always find your socks on the floor.”

His answer catches you off guard, “Oh, well thank you for not making me feel bad about it. I thought I was stealthier than that.”

“I thought it was cute,” he yawns, muffled by your shoulder blade.

You slowly pave the subject towards your burning questions, “Did everything go alright on your trip?”

“Yes, we just finished ahead of schedule and I wanted to come home and see you,” he hums against you and squeezes you a bit tighter.

His sweetness suddenly makes you red and ugly with shame, “I’m sorry you came home to that. It must have been unsettling.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he sleepily scolds, “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that you’re not some scary monster that’s going to shoo me away. You’re dealing with a lot, I get it, but you’re not a lot.”

“Okay,” you don’t say anything further on the subject at the risk of tears.

He then asks just like he always does, “Want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” you dodge and swerve into your inquiries, “Want to talk about your outburst the other night?”

“Not really,” he returns your tone but gives in, “but I suppose we must. I am so so, really, very, terribly sorry. And this is not an excuse, just an explanation. I was very drunk. I didn’t mean a word I said, I was just lashing out.”

“I was never mad at you,” you admit, “just hurt.”

“You have every right to be, I should never have said those things,” you can hear guilt clawing at his every word.

Yet, you can’t help but wonder where the root of his words stemmed, “Are you mad at me, Jake? You know- about all those things you said?”

“No, no, angel,” he is quick to weed that notion from your mind, “I could never be mad at you. I was mad at someone else and I was not in my right mind and you took the brunt of it, I’m so sorry.”

“Josh told me what happened at the bar that night- what that girl said to you,” you feel him physically cringe around you as you confess your knowledge.

“Josh- I swear if his mouth was any bigger he’d be-,” Jake grunts next to your ear.

“No, I’m glad Josh told me,” you come to his twin’s rescue, “he put some things in perspective for me.”

“Well, as much as the sound of my brother ‘putting things in perspective’ for you terrifies me, I didn’t want to tell you and you feel like it was your fault,” Jake counters.

Rightfully so, as you had immediately assigned the blame to yourself.

“Jake do I-,” you hesitate, not sure how to ask without upsetting him, “Does it embarrass you when you show up without- Do I embarrass you?”

“Please, don’t ever feel like you embarrass me,” you swear Jake’s frown and creased brown are audible as he sternly shoots down the theory, “Quite the opposite. I just miss you is all. I miss feeling you by my side. I miss leaning over to tell you stupid thoughts that cross my mind. I miss having you out with everyone and seeing you enjoy yourself and play along with everyone’s antics. I miss looking down in the pit at my shows and seeing you with your hands in the air. I miss you dancing without giving a shit as to what anyone else thinks. I just hate seeing you confined to this house.”

Your first instinct is to be offended but you know he is right. And you don’t want to ever discourage him from being honest with you, especially about what is rattling around in his head.

“And I’m not trying to pressure you because I will be here whenever you are ready,” his voice becomes a small soft thing that urges you to cradle it, “I know we never talk about it but I always think about us.”

“You shouldn’t be waiting for me,” you quip, pricked by guilt at the amount of affection his words harbor for you.

“You speak as if I can look in any other direction, angel,” he muses and laughs through his nose, “The very thought of you sparks electricity.”

“Jake-,” you can’t help but fuss, “you don’t get it. I don’t know when or even if I'll ever be ready. Time is a precious thing. Don’t waste yours on me.”

His fingers absent-mindedly begin to fidget with the hem of your shirt as Jake carefully strings together the articulation of his next thought, “I don't claim to know or even understand what you're going through, I just want to help in any way I can to get you through it. Because you will get through it, that’s why nothing I do for you could ever be a waste. But I need you to completely forget the other night because I promise I am not going to hurt you.”

His last words ring in your ears. You know you are guarded but you hadn’t even registered that’s exactly what you had been doing to him. Brick by brick, you were slowly succeeding to somewhere cold and isolated, trapping yourself in the exact opposite of where you needed to be. You are certain the issue does not lie within a question of trust, Jake is probably the only person you do trust. Yet for a reason that has no name, it's still not enough to let him all the way in.

“Alright, Jake, you know I trust you,” trying not to lead him on, “but I have seen the way your hands twitch in your sleep now. I just don’t think I’m any good to you- to anyone. Not right now. Not like this.”

He runs his fingers up and down your arm,

“Like what?”

Josh’s words come crashing wildly through your head once again. Jake’s faith in you is set in stone. It isn’t a matter of if for him but when you’ll come around. You want more than anything to be by Jake’s side again. After the way Jake has cared for you, all you want is to deliver his faith into his reality.

The only real thing you find yourself coming back to is Jake. He is the only thing you never find yourself fighting to care about in a world losing its color. He is never a chore or a burden. And in such a confusing season, he is the only thing that has constantly held value in your realm.

If trying to overcome for only yourself is not working, maybe you could try facing your fear for a friend. All you ever want to see is Jake happy, and to be the reason for the smile on his face would only help you heal.

“Jake,” you whisper his name, not even sure if you can even form the next words on your breath but already too far into your thought to turn back, “the next time you go out- maybe- I want- I might- I’m going too.”

You can hear him straining to tame his sudden spring of serotonin at the thought, “Are you sure, angel? You have nothing to prove to me.”

“I’ve been thinking about it for a while, Jake,” you proclaim in overconfidence, “I'm more than sure.”

“Well, I’d be more than ecstatic to have you join me,” he fits the crease of his hand into the dip of your waist and squeezes, “but remember, no rush, no pressure.”

“Unless it's a flat party,” you quickly blurt out the stipulation, “I’ve had enough flat parties for a lifetime.”

“Completely understandable,” he nuzzles back into you and yawns, indicating his next wave of dormancy, “I think we’re going bowling later this week. We can abuse our power to rent a few lanes. Should be quiet and secluded. Can’t wait to see you there.”

You can’t help but wonder if you’re making a mistake. This time you presented a seemingly confident front. What if this time you diminish his hope in you? That is if he hadn’t already seen right through your facade.

“Sleep now-,” Jake yawns out fragments, already slurring into slumbering, “I’ll keep you safe.”

You shoo away the swarm of “what ifs” long enough to fall back under a drowsy spell once more as Jake instructed.

pretty please tell me what you think of this little nugget

taglist❤️‍🩹 - @ageofbajabule @alwaysonthemend @anythingforjtk @becinabubblegvf @dancingcarbon @dannys-dream @dayumclarizzel @do-it-jakey-baby @dont-go-home-without-me @edgingthedarkness @fomopheobe @gretasfallingsky @gretavangirlie @gretavanglimmers @gretavangroupie @gvf23 @gvfmarge @hannahrk @heckingfrick @hsfallingsky @imleavingyoufornewyork @kiszkazz @klarxtr @itsafullmoon @jakesguitarsolo @jakesmustache @jakeysbuttsheeks @lipstickitty @livkiszka @lyndz2names @mindastreamofcolours @mountain-in-springtime @mrbrownstne @nina-23-45 @notjordie-gvf @sacredjake @smoking-jakelane @sparrowofthedawnsworld @kiszkas-canvas @takenbythemadness @thewritingbeforesunrise @tommie-gvf @tripthelightfatality @vanfleeter @violet-hayes @wetkleenex-gvf @zoe-tally06

[shes4twnksinatrnchct]

Hell of a Show

Jake Kiszka x fem oc

Fifteen years after resigning from Greta Van Fleet, for reasons undisclosed to the public, Coley Payne is asked by her former band members to tell her side of the story.

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, explicit language, angst, fluff, first love, drug and alcohol abuse, mental health struggles, character death, familial grief, reference to sexual situations, *explicit sexual situations (smut warnings will be mentioned pertaining to each chapter it occurs in).

Words: 3k

A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who has liked/commented/reblogged and even has just read this story so far. It really does mean a lot and I appreciate the support and your time! Thank you.

Please keep in mind this is a work of fiction and enjoy!

***LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED***

***Table of Content***

The Beginning: Interlude i

2039

She can’t keep her concentration. 

Not when he’s glancing around her house with the curiosity of a child, brown eyes scanning around the walls littered with years of photographs, decor, memorabilia, and souvenirs.

One photo in particular catches his eye. 

Possibly one of the first pictures she had taken after leaving the band consists of her holding a seven-year-old Collins on her hip while Kayce holds six-year-old Rhett on his back, the twelve-year-old in the picture smiling ear to ear with his aunt in front of the house she now lives in. 

It was bought without Jake’s knowledge in December of 2023, and was kept from him until the brief break in the tour after they finished their European leg. 

“I’m assuming that’s move-in day?” He points to the photo he’s so transfixed on, and she pokes her head from the kitchen to take a look. 

“Yeah.” She nods, clearing her throat with the discomfort of the conversation before ducking back into hiding, eyeing the frozen lasagna in the oven. 

He pieces together what parts of her life he hasn’t been here in person to witness…everything from vacations through various stages of her niece and nephews lives, to prom pictures, to photos of weddings he was invited to but couldn’t attend due to scheduling conflicts. 

Kayce’s, Collins’, and Rhett’s senior portraits are closer toward the hallway, and although they’re even older now than when the pictures were taken, it still blows his mind to think how fast time has flown by, and hurts his heart to think that he’s missed so much of it with her. 

 “Shit,” He hears her say under her breath, the top of the oven burning her hand, causing her to nearly drop the pan. 

Stepping into the kitchen, he sees another smaller fan perched on the kitchen counter, blowing on her and causing the stray strands of her hair to billow in its breeze. 

She’s chunking the lasagna onto the stovetop, discarding the hot pads from her hands, and examining her wound. 

“Shit, shit, shit,” She continues to herself, hissing through her teeth while her facial expression shifts at the sight of the very top layer of her skin rolled back.  

“Did you burn yourself?” He asks, making his way to her. 

“A little but it’s fine.” Coley assures him, flatly.

“Get some mustard on it.” He advises, and she rolls her jaw. 

“I don’t want mustard on it.” She insists, and he rolls his eyes and moves to her fridge to grab the yellow bottle anyway. “Mkay, I know you’re hard at hearing now since you’ve shot your eardrums through the years, but I said—”

“—I know what you said. And I also know you’re just gonna sit there and whine about it hurting instead of doing something about it.” He quickly rebuttals, popping the top of the bottle, and she holds her hand to her chest. 

“...Does it burn?” She inquires of him, raising her brows. 

“Not any worse than what it already does.” He shrugs, the woman still looking at him unconvinced. “If I have to fight you like I had to when you stepped on glass at the lake, I will.” 

Deciding not to have a rerun of him practically sitting on her while using his dad’s pocket knife to get the shard of broken bottle from the sole of her foot, Coley holds her hand out to him for him to generously graze her burn with a dollop of mustard. 

She’d seen him do it to himself over years of him getting burned cooking, but didn’t think it would actually work. 

Jake waits patiently for her mumbled out, “Thanks,” before he’s replacing the bottle in the fridge.

He’s about to step back to the living room, feeling an icy (regardless of the house being so obnoxiously hot his shirt is beginning to stick to his skin) unwelcome from her, despite the fact she invited him inside after he gave her a little more insight as to what the band is working on with Connie, until he sees her open a cabinet above her head and stand on her toes trying to reach a plate because her niece enjoys being tall and putting things out of her aunt’s reach.

Coley’s bracing herself on the counter to climb onto it when Jake steps behind her and reaches over her head.

She nearly melts to the floor from his close proximity, his warmth against her back, allowing her to get a good whiff of his cologne mingling with the same way he’s smelt since they were teenagers.

Jake’s struggling not to acknowledge that she’s nearly bent over the counter, her knee hiked from where she was about to hoist herself up.

“Thanks.” She says as soon as he hands her three plates and steps back so she can go back to standing.

“No problem.” He assures her with ease, hoping it’s enough to disguise the breath he’s struggling to catch while thinking of the most unattractive things he can to try to eliminate the discomfort below his belt.

“Can you go back there and knock on the last door on the left and tell Collins dinner’s ready?” Coley asks him, needing him to get away from her momentarily.

“Yeah,” He gladly takes the opportunity to escape, and steps to the hallway, a large smile soon overtaking his face. 

The whole hall is like a shrine to her time with the band. 

It’s paid tribute to with pictures of her, him, and the guys from their years of performing and touring—none of which fall in a particular order. 

He cringes at the couple of ones from their earlier shows, horrified with his hair and his clothes before taking note that his brothers are also very much styled like dorks—he’s sure Coley probably thinks as much of herself, too, but he’s too biased to think she never looked good. 

Then, of course, he makes the mistake of not looking away from the wall of the memories, stepping along the wood floors to take in many of the other pictures of later shows. 

One that he’s surprised to see is of their last show together. 

After the high of playing one of his dream venues, in the midst of taking a final bow and waving farewell, he kissed her. 

The silhouette of such is casually framed on her wall. 

It was public knowledge by that point that they were a couple, but never had they dragged their private life onto the stage aside from some looks and silent flirting. 

He assumed this would be the last picture he’d stumble across in her home—or at least without his face scribbled out of it. 

Collins' door swings open, the young woman stopping when she sees him, curiously stepping to his side to see what he’s looking at. 

One might argue it was perhaps one of the last few normal moments they shared together before it all went to hell. 

“God, that was forever ago.” She mumbles, gazing around at the photos surrounding it with gray eyes. “So much has changed since then.”

The ones that she’s in all range from infant to seven years old. 

Collins can tell which ones are post-accident or pre-accident just based on whether her mother or father is present in any of them with her or her brothers…Jake can tell the difference between pre or post-accident based on how exhausted Coley looks despite the smile on her face in every picture. 

“Your aunt said dinner’s ready.” He tells her, pulling his gaze from the photo that elicits the memory of the moment. 

“…I told her I was going out with Dominic.” Collins sighs at her aunt’s lack of listening skills. 

“Glad to know that hasn’t changed .” Jake says to her in reference to Coley only hearing half of what she wants to. 

“Tell me about it.” Collins scoffs, stepping to the kitchen. “Dominic’s about to be here.” She continues while her aunt blinks at her with a blank expression on her face. “I told you last night, remember?”

“Um, given the circumstances it kinda slipped my mind.” Coley scoffs, motioning toward the hallway that Jake’s making his way back up to join them. “What time are you gonna be home?” 

“Late.” Collins shrugs. 

“Where are you going?” Her aunt asks, next. 

“We haven’t decided yet.”

“When you do decide, please let me know.” 

“If it doesn’t slip my mind, given the circumstances.” Collins assures her, hearing the horn of her boyfriend’s car outside. “Bye, see you later,” She hugs at her aunt’s shoulders. 

“Bye. I love you.”

“I love you, too. Bye, Jake.” She pipes in passing. 

“Bye, Collie.” He says without a second thought, her childhood nick-name being the only thing he’s ever called her by unless she was in trouble for something. 

Collins smiles to herself upon hearing it as she walks to the door, while Coley tenses up. 

“He just honks the horn and she goes?” Jake asks once Collins has shut the door, locking it behind her. 

“Yes, Jake.” Coley replies while he takes the extra plate and puts it back up since it’s just the two of them, now.

“Kind of a dick move.” He mumbles, turning to face her.

 “Not everybody can be the pillar of chivalry that you are, Jake.” Coley’s voice is nothing short of smart-ass. 

He leans against the counter, forcing himself not to get any closer to her despite wanting nothing more, and her skin grows warm when she notices that he’s watching her. 

Jake doesn’t dare comment on the lack of sides, or bread, to accompany the lasagna, but one thing he can’t help but ask as she hands him over a plate of the pasta is, “Do you have any wine?” 

Coley pauses, knowing that he surely knows that she does. 

Cigarettes were tossed out twenty years ago, and she could cut back on drinking beer and hard liquor, but wine was a vice that she’d never not have access to. 

But it feels like a trap to get it out, now, because it’s like giving a mouse a cookie—especially when the cookie is wearing a shirt that’s not buttoned as it should be, and has a couple necklaces tucked behind one another splayed across the smooth skin of its chest.  

Yes…if one gives Coley and Jake wine, they’re going to reminisce, realize they miss one another, and decide they’re wearing too many clothes. 

At least that’s how the story went the last time they saw one another. 

“I do…but you need to be able to drive home tonight.” She quips, making it perfectly clear that his welcome does indeed have an expiration date. 

“Ouch.” He hisses through his teeth sarcastically, “Is your boyfriend gonna be home soon or something?” 

“If I had a boyfriend, you wouldn’t be in my house.” She promises him. 

He could easily dig up the past, throw in a comment or two that would irritate her even more, but he just keeps his mouth shut. 

“I have beer.” Coley offers, next, knowing he won’t turn that down.

She pauses and reaches into the fridge, grabbing a bottle and grabbing the bottle-opener that’s magnetized to the refrigerator. 

A soft hiss is let loose from the cap being unsealed, and she doesn’t look at him as she hands the drink over to him, too distracted with putting the bottle-opener back where it was. 

She glances at him momentarily when he brings the bottle to his lips and takes a sip, his throat shifting with his swallow that has her eyes practically paralyzed in a daze that is miraculously broken before he can notice her staring.

Coley merely pretends to have been busy the whole time, reaching for a paper towel to gently wipe the mustard off the back of her hand so she can’t smear it all over her kitchen in the midst of not paying attention to anything but him. 

They’re soon seated at the table, and Jake stabs around at the lasagna, forcing himself to eat a few bites of it to avoid being rude. 

It doesn't go unnoticed, Coley finally poking fun at him with an over-dramatic, “You’re being so brave, right now,” for him daring to at least try it. 

“Ha.” He flatly lets out, looking at her unamused before he cracks a grin. “I haven’t had frozen lasagna since that night Sherri had Collins—or was it Rhett? And we went to help her out since Trace worked nights.” 

Coley had forgotten about that in the midst of all that’s unfolded since then, and her eyes light up as a laugh falls from her lips. 

“And I burnt half of it?”  She adds, and he nods.

“I thought that was gonna finish your sister off, I’m gonna be honest.” He tells her, and she cackles. 

Sherri had awful baby blues at the time, that’s why Coley insisted on helping her as much as she could. 

Jake was an unsuspecting victim that night, wanting to tag along to spend the night and help out at Sherri’s and Trace’s with a newborn Collins. 

The two Payne sisters were both in tears before eight o’clock because Coley severely misread the instructions, and her older sister cried because Coley was crying—leaving Jake and Kayce to keep their mouth’s shut because neither of them were listening to their repeated attempt to reassure them it was going to be okay. 

  It was also the night she and Jake learned to be extremely meticulous about safe sex. 

“That night was the best birth control ever.” She rubs her forehead while he scoffs out through a grin, “Yeah, that fake baby you and Josh had to take care of for two weeks our Senior year was a breeze compared to just one night with a real one.”

“Oh, God, that was a nightmare.” Coley groans, recalling that Josh tried to ditch the simulated baby with her more times than not. “That made me so happy that there was never going to be a chance of him and I having a kid together.”

“Hey, we gotta give him credit. He did pretty damn good with the kids.” Jake takes up for his twin brother. “I think we all did given the very little amount of preparation we had and how fucking young we all were.”

Coley can’t argue it, especially with how sudden all of it happened. 

“Yeah, we did.” She agrees, an awkwardness soon finding them in the silence when the natural point to make, next, is also how suddenly it ended.

But Jake doesn’t dare speak about that, not again, wanting to avoid another fight like the last one they had. 

He’d known her since they were thirteen, and he knew she tended to make rash decisions—if she believed them to be the best option—without letting anyone else know she’d made them until she absolutely had to.  

She finishes her food and heads back to the kitchen with her plate when his phone rings, pulling him out of the room for a couple moments to be berated by his twin brother.  

When he returns to the kitchen, she’s drying their plates off from washing them and offering them to him to put back in the cabinet.

Clearing his throat, he puts them away and says, “I should get going.” 

“Is your girlfriend wanting you home?” Coley downplays her own curiosity as teasing sarcasm, and he pretends he doesn’t notice. 

“Just a ‘61 Gibson and a cat.” He retorts. 

“Does the Gibson feed the cat while you’re running around the world?” 

“You used to not mind all that running around the world.” Jake reminds her partially stern, raising his brows as he steps out of her way while she wipes down the counters.  

“Yeah, well, things change. Responsibilities change.” She offers up a hard pill for either of them to swallow, even fifteen years later. 

Again, he finds himself unable to argue with her out of not wanting to start another fight. 

“I’m supposed to meet Josh at the studio in a few hours and he’s actually gonna be on time—supposedly.” He explains, rubbing at his nose while she replies with a, “Ah,” to which he adds, “Our project meeting is two weeks from Saturday. We’re gonna meet at my house. I can get Josh to send you my address.”

“Are you afraid of having my number in your phone?” Coley teases, not realizing he actually is, wanting to spare her the drunk phone calls in the middle of the night to ask why they aren’t together anymore. 

Jake only laughs her off, not answering her question before she’s asking, “Is it mandatory?” 

“No, but if you don’t show up Josh will probably come find you.” He warns. 

It wouldn’t be the first time his brother has had to hunt her down and drag her practically kicking and screaming to attend meetings. 

“What time do I need to get there?” Coley sighs out, finally looking at him again once she deems the kitchen cleaned up, crossing her arms.

It adds a strain to her glistening chest through her tank-top, and he has to use the will of God himself not to allow his eyes to even dare fall to the exposed skin. 

“Well, it’s set for five o'clock—we’re eating dinner there—but you can show up anytime you want to.” 

“So, it’s set for five o’clock but won’t start until nine o’clock because that is five o’clock Josh-time?” She double-checks, and Jake’s smile practically ignites the room they’re in. 

“Yes.” He nods. “And you can, um, invite Collins and the boys if you want to—for dinner. I know Jules is coming with Danny, so they’ll get to see her if they come.”

“Okay, I’ll let them know.” She agrees. 

“Thanks for dinner.” Jake adds. 

“Thanks for not telling me it was shit.” Coley replies, following him while he grabs his keys and heads to the door, letting out a quiet laugh at her words. 

“Well, I hope your A/C gets fixed. I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep my clothes on next time if it doesn’t.” He sighs once they get onto the porch. 

“There is no ‘next time’.” She shakes her head. 

“…Right.” He shrugs, telling her what she wants to hear while holding an air of mischief in his words. 

“Jake, seriously, no more visits.” She states while he unlocks his car. 

“Okay.” He nods, his tone sarcastic. 

“Jake, no more.” Coley warns and he cranks his car, rolling the window down after he shuts the door to call out, “So, same time next month! Got it!” 

Giving up, she rolls her eyes and throws her two middle fingers up that he gladly returns while backing out of the drive. 

There’s a sense of accomplishment he can’t but feel when the last thing he sees before pulling off is her smile.

That accomplishment lasts only so long before it’s taken over by the same overwhelming thought that she’s asking herself as well: 

“What the hell are you doing?”

.

.

.

.

.

Tag List: @edgingthedarkness , @zooweemama555 , @lizzys-sunflower

[anthemofgvf]

Behind Closed Doors: Jake Kiszka x Reader Fanfiction Series

Part Three

description: when your best friend asks for a favor, that being having his twin move in with you, you're hesitant. you've never really liked him, but you are struggling to meet your rent, so you oblige. who knew with time that you would become more upset with his presence, or upset with the fact you have underlying feelings for him that you don't want to face?

-the masterlist for this series-

trope: enemies to lovers x roommates au!

warnings for this series: alcohol and tobacco usage, explicit content (18+, minors dni), angst, swearing

word count: 6.8k+

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

You expected yourself to feel a bit better about living with Jake. Since it had been a month since he moved in with you, nothing much had changed. You two continued to bicker like kids, although there were those sweet moments where you two got along. You were hoping to see his true colors, since they seemed to have yet to be revealed, but to no avail. You were left living with someone who you couldn't stand. No matter how desperately hard you tried to be optimistic about the living arrangement, you found yourself incapable.

Work was always a relief from him. If anyone was able to love their job, you began to more and more once you realized how busywork kept your mind free of Jake. Finally getting into your manager position, you had more responsibility, and that meant less time to daydream and be left alone with your thoughts.

Every so often, yes, you did complain about Jake to Stacie. But you'd never discuss him with Josh. It felt wrong to do so, and when he asked you about how everything was, you'd always be short with him. You'd quickly change the subject to get Josh to go on a long story about his own life and whatever he had going on, and you were able to indulge in Josh's life rather than your own. It was a blissful escape when you'd go out with Josh or go to work, and when you'd arrive home, you'd find yourself ignoring Jake unless he spoke to you first.

Working for the closest thing to a friendship with him seemed harder than you could imagine. He was stubborn - more than you. You gave up on trying to form some sort of relationship with him, and realized that if it was meant to be, then it would happen. Otherwise, you were sick of playing nice with him while he tried to pick on you purposefully to get under your skin.

Jake began to leave the house more often. It was usually around nighttime that he would be gone, and he never announced his departures. But they were probably for gigs, and you had no intention of supporting him, so you didn't mind the lack of communication. There was never a specific day. It was often a surprise to you on whether he'd be home or not, but you appreciated the quiet apartment whenever it wasn't bombarded with his presence. 

You arrived home from work later in the afternoon, which was longer than your usual shifts. Upon entering, you heard Jake's guitar strumming in his room. Although you were a bit tired and ready to wash off the scent of coffee and sweet bakery items, you decided to stride slowly by his bedroom to hear the playing. 

It was better than you expected. Whatever riff or song he was playing, it was pleasing to your ears. You could go further to say you could feel goosebumps prickling your skin, but you didn't want to play with the idea that his musical talent was an amazement to you. 

You stopped at his bedroom door with folded arms and leaned against the frame of it. He hadn't noticed you just yet, and you were grateful that he didn't, because it gave you more time to listen to his playing peacefully. He was sat on the edge of his bed, with his guitar in his lap and the strap hung lazily around his shoulder. He seemed to be wearing a plain grey shirt with black jeans, which you weren't surprised of the attire. You examined the way he played; he mouthed words that you couldn't quite make out, whether it was the song or some sort of coordination of chords. His fingers glided up and down the neck skillfully, along with plucking the strings into a perfect melody. 

"Stop staring at me." Jake muttered to you whilst he continued playing. 

You straightened your posture. "Do you have a problem with me listening to you play?" 

He sighed, flicking his eyes up to you with a blank face. "Just a bit weird that you didn't say anything and just...stood there watching me. Kind of weird, don't you think?" 

You rolled your eyes at his response. "I didn't want to interrupt you, okay? Is that so bad?" 

"Guess not," he shrugged, "well, did you like what you heard?" 

"As much as I hate to stroke your ego, you're actually not too bad. I could even say that I'm actually impressed." You placed a small grin on your face. 

A hint of a genuine smile hit his lips. There was a small moment of silence, but nothing to make you uncomfortable. "Thank you." 

You nodded. "You're welcome." 

"Surprised you'd pay me a compliment. Seems like you never have anything kind to say to me often." 

You dared to step foot into his room, standing before him as he sat on the bed. His eyes walked up your body with each step you took. 

"Well, today I'm feeling a bit nice. Besides, I've never heard you really play, and I've always wondered if you were actually good or not." 

"Your expectations of me have always been low," he chuckled, "but you think I'm good?" 

"If it's important for you to know, then yeah, I think so. Don't like satisfying your ego, but I can't lie and say you're shit at guitar." 

He set his guitar onto the bed and placed his hands on his thighs. "Seems like you're afraid to compliment me because you think I'll act more arrogant." He stood up from the bed and left a small space of proximity between you two. "But I like the change of heart. Nice y/n isn't so bad, even though you still manage to slide in an intentional, mean comment. But, hey, I'll take it." 

"Not a change of heart, just me showing you that I am capable of not being rude to you." 

He pressed his lips together to contain a smile. He found you entertaining, in the sense that you continued to defend your kindness with reasoning that didn't need to be spoken into the air. "What a surprise. Is this just a one-time thing?" 

You shrugged with your bottom lip sticking out. "Who knows. But you're making this a bigger deal than it should be. Just take it lightly, and try not to be so annoying about it, 'kay?" 

He stifled a laugh. "Yes ma'am. Sorry for being so shocked." His words were laced with sarcasm, which only drove your annoyance more.

You held back an eyeroll and decided to walk out of his room to enter your own. You pressed your arms tightly against your chest in an attempt to contain a scoff of irritation. All you let out as you entered your room was a deep sigh and let that be the most you'd let out in frustration. Your skin itched with the image of Jake's eyes lingering on you. There was an unexpected feeling it gave you, but you couldn't depict what it was. You were unsure if it was mere intimidation, or just annoyed that he laid his eyes on you longer than you'd like. Whatever the reason was for you getting so worked up, you were only going to set your mind on taking a shower and removing the scent of your coffee house off of your body. 

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

You received a call from Josh later that night as you sat in your room. Although you were used to talking to Josh nearly every day, a call like this was somewhat unexpected. 

"Hello?" You said into the phone.

"Hey! My night is open. Was wondering if you'd want to go out and grab a few drinks at Fireside? Are you free?"

You sat up from your bed and walked over to your closet. "Yeah! I'd love to do that. Do you want me to meet you over there now? Or will you be a bit late?"

He chuckled. "I suppose I deserve the shit you give me for never being on time. I was planning on leaving now, actually, so no worrying about being there alone waiting for my arrival."

"Good to know," you hummed, "I'll see you there then."

"Wait," he said, "do you mind bringing Jake along? I'd like to see him. Wonder how he's been."

"Like you don't talk to him nearly every day," you huffed a laugh, "I guess I can invite him."

"You two still not getting along? Have you sorted out your differences yet?" He sighed into the phone.

"I don't know," you examined a top that you pulled out from your closet, then putting in back, "we keep going back and forth. It just seems that we keep on hitting a bump in the road that neither of us want to move past. Sometimes, we seem to get along, but those moments are always too good to be true. I'm trying, though. Think my problem is I can never decipher his sarcasm from his mean remarks." 

"Okay, well, I hope that you can play nice with him for the night. I'd like to enjoy my time with two of my best friends."

You smiled at his remark. "I'll try, but no promises. He likes to change his attitude at the drop of a hat. See you in ten!"

You hung up the phone before he could say give any objections, and you continued to flip through your articles of clothing to find something a bit more suited for going out. You were in a pair of blue sweat shorts and a baggy tank top, so there was no way you'd leave your place without changing.

You landed on a low-cut red shirt that cut just above your bellybutton, and a pair of light wash jeans to match. The weather this time of year was somewhat unpredictable, so you grabbed a grey jacket with you just in case.

After slipping on your shoes and grabbing your purse with all of your necessities, you walked past Jake's room without a single thought. You were used to not letting Jake know about your whereabouts. So, you found yourself stopped at your front door, exhaling a deep breath. You dragged your feet to Jake's closed door, knocking lightly and waiting for a response.

There was a moment of silence, and before you had the chance to knock again, Jake flung the door open with a confused look.

"I'm, uh, going out with Josh to Fireside. He asked if you wanted to come." You spoke quietly, averting your eyes from him for a moment.

"Or else you wouldn't be inviting me, huh?" He placed his hand onto the doorframe.

"Pretty much," you rocked on your heels, "so, you'll come?"

He walked away from the door, throwing on a pair of shoes and walking past you with a sigh. You rolled your eyes at his ignorance, but nonetheless, he was complying. 

"I'm driving, by the way." He clarified to you before opening the front door. 

"Fine by me." You threw your hands up. 

He led you to his car, which was a modest black Nissan. In your head, you imagined his car to fit his narcissistic demeanor, but it was comforting to know that not all of his possessions were based off of your original impression of him. 

The drive was quiet, even growing an uncomfortable silence between the both of you. The only sound that filled the air was the engine of the car running, along with the soft music coming from the radio. It was nearly inaudible, and you thought about turning up the volume yourself. But, nonetheless, you kept to yourself, and kept your eyes glued outside of the window. 

It wasn't too long until you and him arrived at Fireside. You were thankful that the drive was short, which would lessen the time between you and him. It was hard to find something to talk to him about, due to the fact you weren't interested in anything he had to say. But you didn't want to outwardly tell him that, so you just kept your mouth shut to not cause another issue between the two of you. 

You entered the bar and saw Josh sitting alone, with a beer bottle accompanying his hand. Without checking to see if Jake was close behind you, you walked over to Josh quickly and said hello before you fully reached him. 

"Hey! Good to see you." He said, standing up from the barstool and pulling you into a tight embrace. 

His eyes flicked behind you, and his lips curled into a soft smile. You figured Jake was behind you, so you took a step to the side and allowed them to greet each other. Their hug was tight, somewhat meaningful, from what you examined. Jake wasn't lying when he said him and Josh had a great relationship, and a part of you felt a bit sentimental towards them. Not Jake as an individual, but the twins combined. 

"How's everything been?" He asked him. While waiting for Jake's response, he took a sip of his beer. 

His lips were rested into a grin. "Not too bad. Got some gigs coming up, recording studio sessions - the usual." He shrugged. 

"Heard from that record label yet?" Josh asked him. 

"Not yet, but it's only been a few days. All I can do is wait, but I'm hopeful about it." He shrugged. 

Josh turned to you with his hand placed on your back. "Would you like a drink?" 

You nodded in response, and he called the bartender over and ordered your usual, which was a strawberry margarita. One thing you appreciated about him was that he remembered tons of different things about you, big or small. Like your favorite foods, different factoids about your life, and of course, your choice of drink. 

"What's your poison for the night, Jake?" Josh turned to his brother. 

"Something light. I'm driving." He took a seat next to the stool you were stood at. 

He settled on a Coors Light and Josh took his place next to an empty seat, which left an open one in between the two boys. It was his silent way of him wanting you to be sat between the both of them, and as much as you wanted to decline, you obliged and took a seat with a huff. 

There was small conversation between you and Josh, and Jake would butt in and say something to tear the conversation into three. It was an ungrateful presence, and when you'd respond to whatever he said, Josh made sure to remove the tension with a light-hearted joke or changing the subject entirely. 

As you talked to Josh about your new position at work and the minimal things that were happening in your life, you heard the screeching of a chair being pulled out of its spot. When you stopped your talking, you turned your direction to Jake. 

"I'll be back." He tapped his hands onto the counter and walked away without any other explanation. 

"Don't be gone for too long!" Josh joked, taking another sip of his beer and setting it down. Once Jake was far enough, Josh leaned closer to you. "So, things really haven't changed between you two, huh?" 

"Glad you figured that out, despite what I tell you." You chuckled. "Think we've both kind of silently agreed that things aren't going to be different, so we just leave it be and put up with each other. Tried being nice to him and he made it a big deal, as if I've never once been nice to him." 

"You both seem like stubborn people. Well, I know he is," he chuckled, "but you seem to not want to act differently towards him for whatever internal reason that may be." 

"Guess he just needs to earn my respect, which he hasn't." You extended your finger at him with the hand that was wrapped around your glass, with a cocked brow. "He just needs to give me a reason to change my mind about him, you know? He hasn't done anything redeemable yet. I don't really know what to do." 

"It's not a one-way street. I'm sure he has some work to do, but so do you. I don't really know what happens behind closed doors, but I assume that you're trying to act differently towards him, right?" 

"I'd be lying to you if I said that I was." You said sheepishly. "Just got to give it more time, I guess." 

He shrugged with an understanding nod, unsure of what to follow that with. When his eyes left yours, you followed his sight. Turning your head, you saw Jake with a drink in hand, chatting with a girl. With a sigh, you turned back to Josh, who had a slight look of disappointment. 

"Looks like he ditched us for the night." You laughed lightly. 

"Appears that way. But hey, I don't mind it. Glad to at least have you here." He nudged your arm. 

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

You drank the night away with Josh, talking about numerous things that weren't that important. It was easy to talk to him, especially since anything you said he showed extreme interest in. You liked the dynamic between you two, which made you forget about Jake, and gave you a good time without Jake in the picture. It was the sort of night you expected to happen; you and Josh alone while Jake played the field. It was reminiscent of the first night you met him. 

You couldn't forget that day. Whether a year was a long enough time to keep a memory alive in your mind, you still could picture every moment. You remembered what he wore, how he introduced himself and what he talked about. There was that uncertainty of why you were thinking about that night. Maybe it was to drive your annoyance that you felt for him at this exact moment, or it was the alcohol consuming your system and letting your mind wander as it tends to do. 

Jake eventually came back over to the two of you with a playful grin on his face, resuming his original seat and grabbing the beer that was left for him. You didn't pay too much attention to him, but Josh being Josh, immediately struck up a conversation as a welcome back. You didn't know how much time passed between then and now, but however long it was, you noticed the condensation that laid upon Jake's beer bottle had disappeared, and the ice in your third drink had nearly melted. 

You kept your eyes glued to the liquid that was left in your glass. Their conversation flew through your ears, but you didn't pick up on the conversation and left it incoherent. You began to feel the effect of the alcohol on you, with your body growing warm and feeling airy. You decided to finish the rest of your drink in one go and let that be the last of your night and stick to water. 

"Y/n?" Josh nudged you. 

You turned your head to him. "What? Did I miss something?" 

"You heard nothing we said, huh?" Jake said to you with a chuckle.

"I turned on my selective hearing." You smiled, then turned your direction to Josh. "What were you guys talking about?" 

"Talking about how we’re thinking of heading out." Jake said to you. 

You slowly flicked your direction to Jake. "I didn't ask you, Jacob," you spat, "but why head out? The night is still young, isn't it?" 

"Your perception of time is amazing," he jeered, "but it's 11:30. Don't you have work tomorrow?" 

"I have Sunday's off, thank you very much. Why don't you leave, and I stay here with Josh?" You cocked your head to the side. 

He pressed his lips together with a light look of aggravation, but more contorted with disappointment. He was concocting what to say to you next with little time, flicking his eyes between you and Josh. 

"How about I see you for lunch tomorrow, y/n? Go home, get some rest, and we can continue our hangout tomorrow, yeah?" 

He stood up from his chair and wrapped his arms around you tightly from behind. Once he gave his brother a hug, he said his goodbyes to the both of you and pranced out of the bar. 

"Alright, now can we go?" Jake sighed. 

"If you insist." You dug your hand into your purse to rummage out your wallet. As you were doing so, Jake placed his hand on your wrist. 

"I already paid for our drinks." He rubbed his lips together. "Don't worry about it, let's just go, okay?" 

You shot him a confused look, removing your eyes from his hand that wrapped around your wrist and to his. His touch pulled away slowly, but you could feel every movement. You were unsure of the feeling it sent to you, but ignoring it was best for now, and listening to Jake before you made him upset. 

Once getting into his car, you lolled your head onto the window to feel the cold glass soothe your hot head. Your eyes were shut, and in tune with the music that played softly, and you focused on the relaxation of the drive rather than your mind growing dizzy. 

"You have a good time?" Jake asked you. 

You squinted one eye open at him, noticing he was waiting for a response by looking at you. The red of the stoplight shone over his features, highlighting his dark eyes and the carvings of his face. It was something you never intently observed, such as in broad daylight, but now, you were given the opportunity that you wouldn't usually jump at.

"A splendid time. Loved when you ditched us to go talk to that girl. Staying true to character as always, Jacob." 

He rolled his eyes. "I actually went to the bathroom before she came up to me. Not going to resist talking to a pretty girl. Is that so bad?" 

You scoffed with an open-mouthed smile, shutting your eyes and relaxing your head back to its original spot on the window. "Took you long enough to make your way back over to us. Did you get her number or something?" 

"As a matter of fact, I did." He stated proudly. "We'll see whether or not I follow through with texting her." 

"That's kind of fucked up, you know? Giving a girl the impression that you're interested in her, then deciding that you don't want to be a decent human being and try to get to know her." You scoffed. 

"I don't think I need to explain myself to you, but for your information, you've got me completely wrong." He threw his hand out into the air. 

Your eyes opened. "Alright then. How many girls have you actually taken out on dates, huh? Or are there too many to count?" 

"Why are you acting like this, y/n?" He flicked his eyes at you with a scrunched face. "How much did you have to drink tonight?" 

"I'm not even drunk, just tipsy. Enough for me to feel good, but not enough to not control my surroundings. Don't avoid the question at hand. I'm curious." You gave him a playful smile. 

"I don't know, y/n," he sighed, "I've never really been on a real date, but I'd consider having gone on three or four. That's not counting the times I'll meet someone and end up spending time with them for the rest of the night." He shrugged. 

"I catch your drift. Are you some sort of womanizer? Or is that just the rockstar life you're trying to live up to? I mean, how many of those were dates that you didn't end up sleeping with-" 

He was quick to cut you off. "Why is it so important for you to know how many people I've slept with, huh? Frankly, it's none of your business." He looked at you with a face of disgust. "Don't feel like talking about this with you anymore." 

He was growing tense, with his shoulders straightened out and his neck stiff. You'd never seen him so upset before, and it was slightly entertaining that you were getting under his skin. Maybe if you had a good heart in mind, you would feel sensitive about the situation. Guilt, perhaps. But, with the way he treats you, you think he deserves whatever he feeds you. 

"Someone's a bit sensitive." You giggled to yourself. "Would it make you feel better if I told you how many dates I've been on?" 

"I have a feeling you're going to tell me anyways." 

"I've been on four, roughly. Nothing too major, and no one special. I don't really date anymore because I'm too busy with work."

"Thanks for sharing. Can we go in, now?" Jake had already put the car in park, and you shot your head up and saw your surroundings. 

You looked at him, who waited for you to step out of the car or give him an answer. His face was close to expressionless, with a light hint of aggravation. Whatever he was waiting for, you opened the door and stumbled out of the vehicle. 

After making your way to your apartment, with Jake close behind, you dragged your feet to your bedroom. Falling face first onto your bed, you groaned into the sheets. Your comforter was soft against your face, and your body began to feel heavy. 

You forced your body to turn over flat on your back. As you made your movements, you saw Jake standing at the doorway. He leaned against the frame with folded arms. 

"Got something to say?" You lifted your head off the bed just enough to see him. 

He opened his mouth to speak but shut it quickly with a smile. Whatever he was going to say, he decided to save it, and say something different. "You going to sleep in jeans?" 

"Judging me and my comfort? Quite rude." You snorted. 

You leaned up with a huff, sliding your shoes off onto the ground and crawling to your pillows. He still hadn't moved from his stance at the door, watching your movements and keeping his soft smile plastered on his face as you enveloped yourself in your blankets. If the moon wasn't shining into your bedroom, you wouldn't be able to see his smile. Maybe he was unsure if you noticed how he was looking at you, but whatever his reasoning was, you weren't going to acknowledge it. 

"Gonna watch me sleep, Jacob?" You mumbled with shut eyes. 

He chuckled. He stood off from the doorframe and shoved his hands into his pockets. "Just...making sure you're okay, that's all." 

"I don't like when you're nice to me. Feels wrong." You laughed to yourself. "You're giving me the impression that you actually care about my well-being." 

There was silence in the room. You opened your eyes, then turned your head to the doorway. He was no longer there, and your door was cracked open slightly. There was that uncertainty of whether of nor he heard your words. Or, better yet, the unsureness of if you wanted him to hear what you said. You weren't in the right headspace, even if you didn't want to believe it. 

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

There was a recognizable scent that hit your nose when you woke up. It was a light buttery, bread-like aroma that filled the apartment. 

You turned over with a groan and felt the seams of your jeans pinching into your thighs. Remembering you slept in your clothes of last night, you got yourself up and changed into something a bit more comfortable. Throwing on a pair of plaid jaw string pants and a baggy band t-shirt, you walked out of your room. 

You rubbed your eyes to bring your vision to full light. You saw Jake's bare back at the stove, with light smoke rising from the front of him. He was cooking something, and whatever it was, it smelt good. 

"Good morning." You said groggily to him. 

He set a spatula down and turned his head over his shoulder. "Sleep well?" 

"How'd you guess?" You slumped into the stool at your small island. 

"Your hair's a mess." He chuckled. You flattened your hair out and used the ponytail that rested on your wrist to tie your hair up. After watching you, he turned from you, and kept his focus on the pan in front of him. 

"Thanks for letting me know," you rolled your eyes, "what are you making?" 

You tried viewing the stovetop from behind his figure but were unable to. You looked next to him, and noticed a plate sat beside his right side filled with pancakes. Your eyes lit up at the sight. 

"Pancakes?" You said with light excitement. 

"Yup." He responded flatly. 

You got out of your seat and grabbed a plate, along with a fork, and stabbed into one of the airy cakes. Setting it onto your plate, you brought it over to your seat.

"There's syrup in the pantry, by the way. Do you like butter on your pancakes?" He asked you. 

"Syrup's just fine." You stated plainly. 

He set a steaming cake onto the stack, then turning the stove off and grabbing his own plate. You looked at him with confusion. His nice tone was foreign behavior, and one that made you suspicious. There was no reason for you to be, but you couldn't shake the feeling. 

You decided to ignore it and walk into the pantry, finding the bottle of syrup and taking it graciously to your plate. He brought over the hot plate of pancakes, setting it between you two and placing another one onto your plate before you had a say. You thanked him with a small smile and doused the airy cakes with syrup. 

"Did you sleep well?" You dug the side of your fork into your pancakes in an attempt to cut them. 

"Yeah," he huffed a laugh, "thanks for asking." 

You nodded with a hum and took a bite of your food. They were delicious, but pancakes aren't that hard to mess up. The satisfying taste of the sweet syrup hitting your tastebuds and making the pancakes chewier had you fluttering your eyes shut with gratification. 

"Pretty good, Jake." You said to him. 

He was standing across from you, holding his plate in his hand and eating. He nodded and continued to eat. 

"Still going to lunch with Josh today?" He asked. 

"Thanks for reminding me," you said with appreciation, "I'll have to ask him when he wants to go out. Have yet to text him." 

He hummed in response. He was keeping to himself. No snarky remarks, no quips to make you annoyed by his presence. It was an odd feeling that helped wake you up more. 

"Is there," you began, "is there a reason you're being so nice to me this morning?" 

He finished his food and set his plate into the sink. "Do I need a reason to be nice to you?" 

You shook your head with your bottom lip into a pout. "Just suspicious, that's all." 

He chuckled at your response. He walked over to the fridge and grabbed two water bottles for the both of you. 

He set one of them down in front of you. "Just...woke up in a good mood, I guess. Sorry for freaking you out over my kindness." 

You huffed a laugh as you stood from the stool and walked over to the sink. "I just find it weird. Don't think I've ever woken up and you've actually spoken more than five words to me." 

You began to wash your plate, then setting it into the dishwasher. You jumped onto the corner and snatched your water bottle from the other side of the island, opening it and taking a few drinks of the liquid. 

Jake stood across from you, with his hands sprawled onto the counter behind him and giving you an odd expression. "Well, think it's time we turn over a new leaf, don't you think?" 

"Like, no bickering?" You pretended to wriggle with disgust, which caused him to laugh. "Don't think I'm ready to not hate you yet." 

"You're stubborn, you know that?" He said with a small smile. 

"As are you. What a coincidence." You shrugged, pulling your legs onto the counter and sitting crisscross. "Do you have a gig tonight?" 

"Yup. Performing with two other bands, I think. It's at a pretty nice venue, so I'm a bit excited." 

You nodded. "Did you invite that girl from last night?" 

He rolled his eyes in return. You couldn't miss the chance of picking at him a bit, because after all, it was entertaining to you. 

"Maybe," he shrugged with a knowing smirk, "so I’d like it if you didn’t come." 

"And don't bring her over tonight. Deal? Besides, I wasn't planning on seeing you perform, anyways." You quipped back. 

He nodded with a sigh, pushing off the counter behind him and making his journey back to his bedroom. You followed his movements only for a moment, then hopping off the counter and starting your day. 

You texted Josh, who said that he would be able to meet you for lunch around 12, so that left most of your morning free. You weren't sure how to fill your morning, other than to relax in bed or tidy up the apartment as you pleased. Getting ready knocked about an hour and a half of waiting time off your shoulders, so now, you were left with a little under two hours to yourself. There was always sparking up a conversation with Jake, but you didn't feel the need to. Or, necessarily, the want to. 

You were left alone with your thoughts, though, which was something you never liked. You always appreciated being busy to keep your mind occupied and not on anything particular. But, with your time off, and the recent events, you sat on your bed and ran through everything. 

The thing that stuck to mind first was Jake’s change of behavior this morning. Sure, it could've been a periodical moment, and he'd go back to being his snarky self later. But, leaving him alone would keep you from venturing that idea any further. There was always reasoning behind his actions, whether he wanted you to know that or not, and it picked at your brain agonizingly. Just like Josh said, there was an internal reason for your hatred. There was the obvious answer, which was you never liked him. His reckless behavior, matched with his egotistical persona that constantly irked you. His first impression always stuck to you, so when he changed his attitude directed towards you, you were left to assume it was for his own personal gain. 

But the negative mindset you had on him shouldn't be as much of a main focus as you make it out to be. Sure, you didn't like him, but you're stuck with him by choice. He seemed to be trying to earn your respect, which you appreciated, but it still shadowed your thoughts with suspicion. 

When it came time for you to meet Josh for lunch, instead of meeting you at your usual spot, he asked you to meet at a deli nearby. You obliged, and upon arrival, he was already waiting for you outside. You always adored the platonic relationship between the two of you. You were quite fond of your friendship with him, and his twin was never going to get in the way of your bond. It was a sacred relationship that only made sense to have with him. 

"Nice to see you on time." You smirked at him. 

He chuckled, leading you instead the small shop. "Well, I was a bit excited for this little lunch date. Would like to know what happened after I left." 

You shot him a skeptical look. "What do you mean by that? Did Jake say something to you?" 

"No, I didn't ask him about it," he chuckled, "but I'm just curious." 

You placed your order before Josh and waited for him to finish his own. 

"Nothing happened, I guess. He was just acting unusual." You shrugged. "You know, nice?" 

He threw his head back with a faux shocked expression. "My brother was nice to you? Who would've guessed?" 

You playfully pushed his shoulder, causing him to chuckle and wear a permanent smile. "Listen, it was weird for me, okay? I mean, he waited for me to get comfortable in my bed before he went to his room. And he even woke me up with pancakes this morning. Just makes me think he's trying to get something out of me." 

"Or, he's just being a good person," he argued, "but it does seem a little weird, I suppose, considering yours and his's relationship. It's random but makes sense." 

"How does him being nice to me make any sense, Josh? He doesn't like me, and I don't like him. That's how it's always been."

"And would you like to keep it that way?" 

You huffed a sigh. As yours and Josh's names were called, you picked up your small platter containing a sandwich and took a seat outside with Josh. 

"I don't know," you shrugged, "I just think it's better this way. It's already aggravating enough to try and change my mind about him. He's always just rubbed me the wrong way." 

"I think you just need to accept that he's trying to show you who he really is, because he's becoming comfortable with you, and not just putting on a facade because he feels the need to. If anyone knows him and how he is, it's me." 

You nodded at his response, taking a bite of your sandwich. "Guess I'm just a little nervous as to what that means, in an odd way. Like, I'm afraid of the embarrassment of being wrong about him. I don't know if that makes sense..." You placed your hand onto your head.

"No, no I understand," he reassured, "and it's okay to feel that way about him. Just don't shut him out. If you see him opening up, try and embrace it. He's trying to make a better impression of himself for you, so do the same for him. You'll find yourself miserable if you just find his kindness annoying." 

"I guess it's my fault for being so stubborn. Like you said, he's trying to make things better, so I shouldn't dismiss that and let my impression of him get the best of me." 

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

After your lunch date with Josh, you arrived back at home to see Jake walking out of his room with his guitar case in hand. 

"Leaving early for the gig?" You said to him. 

"There's something called rehearsal before every performance, so yeah, I'm leaving early." He wore a light smirk to show his sarcasm. 

You nodded. "Good luck." 

He worse a confused expression, but then rested it into a content one. "Thanks." 

He walked past where you stood to the door, which you followed with your eyes. 

"Jake?" 

He turned to you. "What?" 

"I never thanked you for breakfast this morning. I appreciate it. It was...a nice gesture." 

Something about the way he looked at you with a soft expression made your words feel more heartfelt than you intended. You were just trying to take Josh's advice, along with his, and the approach gave you an odd feeling. You were pushing down everything you felt towards him and showing your true character. Showing him you had the ability to be indifferent to your own feelings of him and pay homage to his actions. 

"It's not a big deal," he scrunched his eyebrows together with his sly smirk, "but I appreciate it. Don't expect it to be an everyday thing, though." He pointed his finger at you. "Anything else, or can I leave?" 

You folded your arms over one another. "You can go." 

A smile rested on your face, one that ran to your cheeks and made them burn. He left without another word, and you locked the door behind him. 

As much as it felt awkward to be nice to Jake, it wasn't a terrible start, nor was it as bad as you imagined. You two just had to get over that awkward stage of uncomfortableness, such as being uncertain of how to show your kindness to one another. But you were getting somewhere, right?

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

-part four-

series taglist: @jakekiszkasmommy @anythingforjtk @gold-mines-melting @twistedmelodies @ageofhearingloss @classicsneverdie @lmaooharry @raviolilegs @mydarlingdanny @iheartjakekiszka @edtvdf @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @gvf23 @flo-gvf @madneedshelp @carlyfleet @pinkunicornsandbluecows @joshysgirl @jasminesworldd @alwaysonthemend @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface @takenbythemadness

other tags: @songbirds-sweet @sacredjake @mountain-in-springtime @ignite-my-fire @gvfsstardust @jakesguitarsolo @fallonfatality @digitalcalamity @demolitionndann @lipstickitty @lexii-nv-c @joopsworld @gvfpal @hellowgoodbye @writingcold @loverleaverslayerbeliever @stardustcatcher @absolutely--mental @hippievanfleet @haileygvf @gretasfallingsky @dont-go-home-without-me @beckahvanfleet @threadthatssacred @indigofallingsky @audgeppp