#and that she felt like she always had to fix me because i was helpless

[highraccoon]

when you explain that you're looking for compassion and believing in the best in each other in a relationship and that you felt it was inappropriate to bring up how someone else's issues (they are unrelated to the problem) were worse and more valid than yours and that you have no right to be upset because you're the villain for things that they misunderstood you doing or just did themselves and blamed you for. they also accuse you of being codependent with your needs. so you try to repeat yourself on your expectations and boundaries in friendships (i will accept no less than someone at least putting in the effort or having the desire to have a healthy friendship) and that there was so much she did that i never asked for nor wanted but i accepted it because i didn't want to seem ungrateful so whatever codependency she felt we had must have been one sided because i explicitly remembered that i never made her responsible for my mental well-being, i did not actually like that she treated me like a child and i had been complaining about that for years in our friendship especially near the end of it. i was an adult and didn't appreciate being treated like a child. but i went along with it because i was willing to let her get away with it if that's what she felt she needed from our friendship. so i sent her a basic infographic about healthy relationships and how they work and noted that the things i had asked for were just basic healthy relationship things and that i have never at any point in our friendship wanted her to take care of me. i wanted us to be equals. she told me that she wasn't willing to put in that amount of effort for anyone and how her boyfriend is her family and her life and her purpose and how friends just weren't really a priority at all and they certainly never got close to the level of importance as her romantic relationship. like... she literally disagreed with treating people with basic respect because friendship wasn't worth that effort. so i told her i hope she heals that wound in her heart and that she can eventually move on from whatever caused it but that i refused to settle for less than a healthy friendship just because she doesn't know how to love anyone fully or put aside her pride. that i genuinely hope she heals and has a good life but to never contact me again because i don't care to see it. that whatever is going on with her that she's been running away from isn't my problem for her to project onto me. she doesn't get to assume my intentions or thoughts or feelings about anything when she never asked me once. but fine, she has every right to think whatever she wants about me regardless of how true it is because I'm not responsible for her feelings, especially not now and i would genuinely appreciate it if she never spoke to me again.

people in the thick of amanormativity who haven't deconstructed relationships with others who are strict monogamists are so fucking exhausting.

[captainlunaxmen]

First Sight

Dark!Coriolanus Snow x Fem!reader

Here we are! Sorry for the wait, but I thought I had everything planned out and... I didn't, so I'm sorry I made you wait this long❤️❤️❤️

Let me know what you think, please, because this is my first time writing a dark fic, so feedback is highly encouraged in this case🙏🙏🙏

Summary: Y/n has been part of the Covey since she can remember, when her best friend Lucy Gray is chosen for the Hunger Games her world is threatened, she need to stay strong for her family. She's never been one to love attention. She never wants to draw too much anyway, gladly leaving the stage to her best friend, but she managed to catch someone's attention anyway. A young, ambitious man from the Capitol saw her for just a moment, but that was enough to make an obsession grow inside him.

Warnings: dark fic, obsession, harassment, smut, rape.

Tag list:

@7s3ven @wintersforest @tallulah477 @diannnnsss @that-one-person-blue @kemo19

"Are you sure you want to wear that?" Y/n asks her best friend as they get ready to, yet, another reaping day.

"Of course." Lucy Gray answers, simply as ever, "at least I'll look pretty when they say my name."

"If." Y/n reminds her, "if they say your name."

"After all that mess with Billy Taupe? Mayfair will surely ask her daddy to pull some strings." Lucy Gray slightly scoffs.

"Maybe not..."

"You're too optimistic sometimes." She smiles at her friends, fixing the colourful skirt down.

"I just don't want to think about the worst." Y/n replies, tightening the belt on her own dress.

"Better get used to it."

They share a look, one filled with hope yet resignation too. They smile at each other and walk hand in hand out their home to get to the town square for the annual reaping.

--------------

They hold each other's hand until Lucy Gray's name is announced, and after a quick squeeze, she lets her friend's hand go to walk to the stage.

Y/n's breathing is heavy and frantic. She can't believe it, and when she notices Billy Taupe trying to talk to Lucy Gray, she has to contain herself from hitting him with a shoe... or two.

But her eyes are on her best friend walking up, and then she notices something in her hand. Y/n has to contain her laughter when Lucy Gray puts that something in Mayfair's dress. She can guess it was either a snake or a small lizard. Without much reaction to Mayfair's screams and the mayor's order to help his daughter Lucy Gray walk the stairs, but before she could get on, the mayor slaps her right in the face, making her fall Y/n's feet move on their own, she need to be blocked by a Peacekeeper to realise what was happening. She looks behind her to the rest of the Covey, scared and helpless. So the only thing that comes up to her mind is the only things that always help them all.

Music.

Y/n sings the first verse of one of their favourite songs, and when the other Covey follow Lucy Gray stands up and sings too.

She sends a sad smile to her family before walking away with Jessup and the Peacekeepers.

"Clear the square!" One of the Peacekeepers yells, and everyone starts to walk away to their own business.

"Let's go home." Y/n hugs Maude Ivory, and motion to the rest to follow her.

"Will we ever see her again?" CC asks.

"One thing about Lucy Gray is that she should never be underestimated." She replies, "So... she still hasn't sung her last song."

--------------

Coriolanus Snow is a collected man. Whatever happens to him, he tries his best not to show any reaction to it. But he almost can't help the gasp after he saw the girl from 12. He noticed how she wanted to reach her friend after the mayor slapped her.

Some people would dare say it's love at first sight, Coriolanus doesn't exactly know what to believe, he never felt like that before, he feels like all he could do all day is think of her, just that and it would be almost enough for him... only having her would satisfy him properly.

But he can't risk it... he can't risk his winning for someone he only saw for mere seconds.

He needs to keep his eyes on the real goal.

--------------

When he got home that day and talked to Tigris, he thought he left the girl in the back of her mind.

"I can't even imagine how her family must feel... that girl, did you see her?" Tigris asks, "her eyes when that man slapped Lucy Gray..."

"Yeah... she was ready to jump in and defend her." Coriolanus says casually, "she sang for her."

"I bet they sang a lot together... both of them got a beautiful voice." Tigris guesses, sadness evident in her voice.

"Beautiful indeed." Coriolanus whispers.

Now, his mind is back on her.

That nameless girl from 12. How did she manage to strike him like that? How she stepped out of line to reach her friend, how she sang for her. What was it?

"You okay, Coryo?" Tigris snaps him out of his thoughts.

"Who do you think she was?" He asks.

"Who?" Tigris is confused.

"That girl, the one who sang for Lucy Gray." He specifies.

"Oh... uhm.. I don't know. Her sister? Or maybe a friend, I don't know." She answers, still confused by her cousin's question. "Why do you want to know?"

"No reason." Coriolanus shakes his head, "Goodnight, Tigris."

Without waiting an answer he walks to his bedroom, gets ready for bed and lies on it with one thought in mind.

Surprisingly, not the Hunger Games.

No.

The nameless girl from 12.

--------------

Y/n helped Maude Ivory carry the small television their neighbours landed them so they could keep up with the games and, most importantly, Lucy Gray.

"Remember you have to babysit their babies this week, okay?" Y/n tells the young girl as they plug the television in.

"Of course, are you going to sell your bread?"

"Yes, I left some dough to rise this morning. By tonight, it'll be ready to bake." She assures her.

"Is it on?" CC comes in followed by Tam Amber.

"I think... if I do this." Y/n hits the box hard, and suddenly the screen turns on.

"Careful!" Maude Ivory shouts.

"He told me it needs it sometimes. It's okay." Y/n waves her off as the screen finally shows some movements, still no sound, but it's still something.

"Who is that?" CC asks, as a man appears on the screen wearing a high-collared suit and gelled hair, "is he a clown?"

"Could be..." Y/n sighs.

"Where is he?" Tam Amber asks, getting closer.

"No idea... there are bars behind him... I think..." Y/n tries to answer, but the scene is not clear yet, so she hits the television again.

"Y/n!"

"See? Now it's better." Y/n nonchalantly says, "seems like a cage... wait..."

"There's people inside." CC notices, "are those the tributes?"

"Oh god... probably."

"Can you see Lucy Gray?" Tam Amber asks.

"There... I think she's the only one wearing so much colour." Muade Ivory points at a point in the back.

"Yes, that's her... who's that with her?" Y/n moves closer to the screen, "he looks too cleaned up to be a tribute."

"No idea." CC says.

The host notices them too and apparently asks them to get closer.

Y/n looks more attentively at the guy, inspecting him now closer to the camera, it's clear he's not from the districts.

"Could it be someone from the Capitol?" The little one suggests.

"He could be... but why is he in there?" Y/n sighs, frustrated, "damn it, why can't we hear anything?"

"Y/n! I'm so sorry!" Barb yells from the kitchen.

Y/n is immediately on her feet running to her.

"What happ-" she starts but stops as soon as she see the bowl with the dough she prepared on the floor, "how?"

"I was cleaning and I accidentally hit it. I'm so sorry." Barb Azure explains, apologising again.

"It's..." Y/n lets out a puff of air, "it's okay, I can still save some. Don't worry."

"I'm really sorry."

"It's okay, really." She immediately pick up what she can from the floor, "I can save some. We'll just sell a little less than usual, tomorrow I'll make more."

"I'm..."

"Don't, it's okay, I promise. Go see Lucy Gray on TV, c'mon." She nudges the girl and kneel down to clean, " go."

Y/n watches Barb Azure disappear in the other room, takes a deep breath and goes back to work.

--------------

They managed with selling the bread, the milk, the occasional jewellery Y/n makes and the performance at the Hob to survive.

Y/n haven't been sleep well since Lucy Gray entered the Arena. She's glad Jessup and her managed to escape the toher tributes and found somewhere to hide. But Y/n can't help the anxiety devouring her everyday, she tries to ease the Covey, making them distracted with everything she could think of, but even singing and dancing isn't the same.

Y/n decided to forbid them from watching the games after Jill's, she thinks her name was, death and Reaper lined up the corpses of the others. She didn't want to risk them seeing Lucy Gray among them... she doesn't even know is she herself could.

But tonight Y/n feels like she needs to watch, she has to, for Lucy Gray, a way to be with her. She tries to spot her in the arena, and when the screen show Coral and Treech finding her in a air vent, Y/n stands immediately getting closer to the screen, and needs to hold in a scream when Coral manages to male her friend fall.

Out of her hiding space.

Back in the arena.

Suddenly a giant tank is lowered into the arena Y/n feels her breath stop. Nothing good could come out of there, nothing good comes from the Capitol.

The little girl from 8 get closer, thinking it's their signal they're going home, but unfortunately the tank breaks and thousands of colourful snakes creep out covering her small figure, most likely killing her.

They all run, run to a higher ground, the boy from 4 falls and the snakes caught up with him.

Lucy Gray and Coral run, while Reaper lets the snake take him.

Y/n holds her breath as she watches Coral say something to Lucy Gray, unfortunately they never managed to fix the sound so she can't hear them, but she can understand when Coral is dead, as the snakes tie themselves around her.

That leaves Lucy Gray the last one... she's won.

"What..."

Why aren't they letting her out? Usually they stop once there's only one left.

Lucy Gray keeps backing away from the snakes, and Y/n can see her mouth moving, she doesn't hear, but she can guess she's singing. Usually snakes there in 12 like music, maybe she's trying it with the Capitol's ones too.

When Lucy Gray's face points direct the camera it's clear ad the day that she's singing, with all the strength she has.

"Let her out." Y/n whispers.

Suddenly, the screen changes signaling that Lucy Gray indeed won the Hunger Games.

"Oh my god!" Y/n can't help but scream, she doesn't care if everyone is already asleep.

"What's going on?" Tam Amber walks in, sleepy face and all, followed by Maude Ivory.

"She won!" Y/n screams again.

"Lucy Gray won?!" Moude Ivory immediately runs to hug Y/n.

"She did it!"

"Does that mean she's coming home?" CC asks, he too arrived after hearing all the noise, Barb Azure too.

"I think so." Y/n nods, smiling like never before, a heavy burden is finally off her shoulders and she can let out a sigh of relief, "she's coming home."

--------------

"Your life has just begun." Sejanus tells him as they both travel to district 12, "you're gonna do great. We're both gonna do great."

"Just be careful, okay?" Coriolanus says to him, "it's a different world out here."

"Look at the bright side." He simply replies, and Coriolanus sends him a questioning look, "she might be there."

"Who are you talking about?"

"I heard you and Lucy Gray talking once." He starts, "you asked about the girl who sang for her at the reaping ceremony."

"I.." Coriolanus is caught off guard.

"You're lucky, Ma always told me stories when I was younger about love at first sight." He explains, "the way you ask more and more about her... you can't fool me." He lets out a small chuckle.

"And if she's not there?" Coriolanus asks.

"Why wouldn't she?"

"What if they killed Lucy Gray and she just doesn't want to have anything to do with me? How about that?" He challenges.

"They wouldn't. She was a hit, Coryo. There's no reason for them to kill her." Sejanus tells him, "so you know her name?"

Of course he does, it's the very first thing he asked Lucy Gray. He's been reciting her name since he learned it.

"Y/n." He smiles as he says it.

--------------

"You're singing with me tonight." Lucy Gray warns Y/n, as they gather the instruments they need for tonight's performance, the first since Lucy Gray got back.

"I am... so not doing it." Y/n replies, shaking her head.

"Why not?" She pouts.

"Because I... I'm not." Y/n simply answer, not meeting her eyes.

But Lucy Gray doesn't give up so easily, she tries to make eye contact with her friend, she knows she wouldn't resist.

"Give me a good reason." Lucy Gray challenges again.

"Because... The people want you." Y/n tells her, "you're better at singing than me."

"That's not true." Maude Ivory chimes in, "they loved you."

"Thank you..." Y/n says sarcastically, "I'm not doing it."

"Oh c'mon, I got back, think of it as a welcome back present!" Lucy Gray nudges her friend, "pleeeease."

"Nope, I was almost fainting the whole time I was on stage." Y/n shake her head once again, "not gonna happeen" she sings the last bit.

"You had to refuse me with that beautiful voice of yours too?" Lucy Gray accuses with a laugh.

"Yap." Y/n replies, "c'mon, we don't want tot be late."

"This is not the end." Lucy Gray warns her friend before taking her hand and then, with the rest of the Covey, head to the Hob.

--------------

Coriolanus couldn't contain himself, he can't wait to get out and find his girl.

She is his, he can't see it any other way.

They enter the Hob and Sejanus goes to get them a drink, while Coriolanus looks around, taking in the place, listening to the music.

His eyes find themselves on the stage, as a little girl goes to the mic.

"Is it hot in here?"

They must be the Covey Lucy Gray talked so much about, but he still can't spot Y/n. Where could she be?

The audience cheers loudly

"'Cause we're planning on heating it up a set more!" The girl screams, "the one, the only, Lucy Gray Baird!"

Coriolanus' ears perk up at her name, maybe his girl is with her.

Lucy Gray enters the stage, spinning with her guitar in hand, smiling as brightly as ever.

"Oh hey district 12, did you miss me?" She asks the audience, that immediately replies with a loud "Yes!"

"I bet you never expected to lay eyes on me again. And let me tell you, that goes both ways, but I am back. " She cheers, "I sure am back. Oh is that bottle there for me?" She asks pointing at a bottle of alcohol someone's holding up, " oh c'mon y'all, you know I gave up drinking when I was 12," she fakes complain and takes a sip, "just to clear my pipes, just to clear my pipes! Now, how about a song, uh?" Everyone cheers, happy, "but, I can't, you know." The audience lets out confused and discontent noises, Lucy Gray glances slightly at the side of the stage, in the dark Coriolanus can't see anything, "it's been a while and I don't feel like singing alone tonight. But I'm afraid, my sweet best friend, won't do me the favour... how about you help me convince her?"

The audience immediately burst into a wave of cheers and applauses.

"Do you want her?"

The cheering gets louder.

"Y/n!" Lucy Gray yells, "c'mon out, babes!"

"Y/n. Y/n. Y/n!" The audience chants.

And at last, she walks on the stage, glaring at her friend playfully.

Coriolanus heart skips a beat as he watch her walking to her friend, he never thought he could get more enamoured with her, but here she is, and he can't seem to take his eyes off her. The way she takes the guitar Lucy Gray offers her, the way she timidly smiles at the audience, once again glaring at her friend for putting her in this position.

"See? They love you!" Lucy Gray points at the audience, "now, let's show them how it's done!"

Lucy Gray nudges her friend with her hip as Y/n starts to play the guitar.

Coriolanus eyes are solely on her, and she isn't even aware of it, he can afford admiring her a little more before making her his.

--------------

Lucy Gray is the happiest since she managed to have Y/n sing and dance with her, but the moment he notices a familiar pair of eyes he freezes for an instant.

Coriolanus Snow is here in 12, and he's looking, no... he's staring at her friend.

She notices his weird interest in Y/n from the many unusual questions he made when they were talking. She didn't like how he was talking and asking about her friend like that, like he thought she was his already. She always dismissed it as a stupid sensation, maybe it's exactly that, just her sensation. He might like her, but nothing bad... not necessarily. She doesn't want to think bad of it.

Of course she told the Covey about everything that happened in the Capitol, she just didn't mention this particular thing, to protect her.

She take advantage of an instrumental break to tell Y/n.

"He's here." She says.

"Who?" Y/n asks, looking at the crowd, locking eyes with a blonde man.

"My mentor, the one I talked to you about." Lucy Gray answers.

"Is he blonde?" Y/n asks and Lucy Gray nods,"Why is he here?"

"No idea."

Y/n simply shrugs and keeps play while Lucy Gray sings, unfortunately their performance is cut short by Billy Taupe intervention.

"Fuck..." Y/n sighs, keeping playing, "it's not the first time he acts like that."

"I know you miss me, Lucy Gray." Billy Taupe drunkenly says getting closer to the stage, followed by Mayfair trying to stop him.

"You said you wouldn't play with them anymore." She complains.

Lucy Gray looks at the Covey rolling her eyes, Y/n rolls her own in agreement.

Suddenly Billy Taupe almost jumps on stage grabbing Lucy Gray's skirt.

"Don't touch me! After what you did, don't touch me." Lucy Gray orders him, kicking her foot to let him go of her skirt

"Y/n... Please, you're kind, you know you're all not the same without me." He moves to take Y/n's skirt now, "c'mon, make her see reason."

"Let go." Y/n tells him, she moves backwards but his grip makes her stumble and falls to the ground. Lucy Gray kneels to help her pull her skirt back.

A second later Billy Taupe is thrown to the side, making him lose his grip. The two girls look at the direction he was thrown, and they see that blonde man hitting him hard until another recruit stops him and takes him outside.

"Are you okay?" Lucy Gray asks, helping her friend to stand up.

"Yeah, yeah, all good." Y/n nods, "again, not the first time he acts like that."

"God.. I'm sorry.." the brunette says softly, picking up the guitar.

"Not your fault. Only his." She sighs, "I'm kinda glad your mentor was here, he was the only one to help."

" yeah, glad..."

"Is everything okay?" Y/n worries.

"Yeah, it's just weird seeing him here." Lucy Gray dismisses the question easily, "let's go home, c'mon"

"Okay.." Y/n isn't convinced, but decides to let it go for now, "c'mon ladies and gentlemen, let's get home."

"Wanna go practice some songs on the meadow, tomorrow?" Lucy Gray asks as they walk back home.

"I missed it so much, so of course!" Y/n cheerfully replies, earning a just as excited laugh from her friend.

--------------

Lucy Gray and Y/n played all afternoon in the meadow, like old times. It wasn't that long Lucy Gray stayed in the Capitol, but not knowing if she were to come back at all made it feel so much longer.

"I think this part should be a little slower, what do you think?" Y/n would ask after a while of playing 'The Hanging Tree'.

"This last part of the verse, you mean?" Lucy Gray checks, looking at the music sheets.

"Yeah, I think..."

Their heads snap behind them when they hear footsteps nearing.

"Sorry... we..." the same blonde man from the night before speaks, along a dark haired man, "they say we would find you out here."

"You're here... with that uniform.." Lucy Gray nervously chuckles.

"I thought they killed you." He simply says.

"Killed?" Y/n can't help the question.

"He... uhm.." his friend starts.

"I broke the rule to save her life." He answers, faking humbleness.

"The dean... Highbottom, got me on a train and gave me some money. He said you were sent to 8." Lucy Gray is quite confused.

"Change of plans." He would smile, "I'm Coriolanus Snow, by the way." He moves closer extending his hand for Y/n to take.

"She's Y/n, my best friend I told you about." Lucy Gray introduces her.

"Hi.." she shyly greets, taking his hand. She can't help the surprised "Oh..." When he, instead of shaking her hand, kisses the back of it.

"Nice to properly meet you, she talked a lot about you." Coriolanus charmingly smiles, "this is my friend, Sejanus."

"Nice to meet you," Lucy Gray shakes his hand with a bright smile.

"Nice to meet... you... too." Sejanus greets back with a sweet and kind smile.

They look at each other for a moment, just smiling. Y/n never saw he friend smiling like this with someone, she is so focused on her friend that she didn't notice Coriolanus still holding her hand, still looking at her.

"Oh sorry." Y/n finally takes notice of his hand and takes her own back, missing the pout forming on Coriolanus' face.

"All good." He whispers, "we quite enjoy the show yesterday."

"Oh.. yeah, yeah, yeah, it was great... until that guy came in." Sejanus agrees, nervously looking at Lucy Gray.

"Yeah, Billy Taupe can't accept the fact that we manage without him." She replies, smugly.

"Well, he's lucky you got back" Y/n mutters, "thanks, by the way, for getting him off and... also, of course, for saving Lucy Gray." She looks up at Coriolanus.

"A pleasure, really. There's no need to thank me." He replies, hitching to hold her hand again, to hold her to him and never let go, "anything for you."

At that Y/n takes a small step back, feeling a little nervous under his stare.

"We're going to the lake, tomorrow. Do you guys want to join?" Lucy Gray suddenly asks, surprising her best friend.

"Really?" Sejanus checks in, looking at the girls, "we'd like to."

"Of course, a way of thanking you." She assures him, "we usually go and have a sort of picnic."

"We'll look forward to it." Coriolanus too agrees.

"Yeah, it would be nice." Y/n wraps her arms around herself, to shield herself from his eyes.

"She makes an amazing apple cobbler too, the young ones loves it." The brunette praise her best friend, locking their arms together.

"You cook too?" Coriolanus is surprised, pleased, "you didn't tell me."

"She can do a lot of things, a real walking talent." Lucy Gray smiles proudly at her friend, nudging her side. Y/n's cheeks warm up at the compliments, turning her head to look away from them all.

"Always so shy, aren't you?" Coriolanus softly comments.

"She's never been the best with compliments." Lucy Gray softly chuckles, squeezing her friend's arm, "but she deserves them all."

"I'm sure she does." His soft stare makes Y/n shiver, she doesn't know why but she's intimidated by it.

"Uh..." she would start, but her eyes catch something behind the two men, "Maude Ivory." Lucy Gray follows her eyes to the little girl.

"You're friends peacekeepers." She says.

"They must be here for the fight." Y/n guesses, "I'll go handle it."

"I'm coming with you."

"Get the guitar, then." She instructs and Lucy Gray grabs the guitar.

"Hey.. we can't be seen with you, though." Coriolanus quietly tells them.

"That lake is in the woods, no one knows much about it but us, don't worry." Lucy Gray reassures him.

"That's comforting." Sejanus smiles grateful at her and she returns it.

"See you tomorrow then." Coriolanus says looking at Y/n who simply evades his stare, she politely smiles, but that doesn't stop Coriolanus from dreaming about her that night. How right their hands felt together, how beautiful she is so close... he can't wait for the next day.

He feels somehow grateful for Sejanus presence, he's sure Lucy Gray invited them both because she's interested in him. He remembers the little glances she would send his classmate at the Capitol. He will use it to his advantage, he knows how much Sejanus would love to help him get the girl of his dreams, he just needs a little push.

--------------

Y/n is making a new dough for the next day, while they're at the lake it will have time to raise. She's mostly making it to get her mind busy, to sort of preparing herself for the day at the lake with the two peacekeepers.

"Are you okay?" Lucy Gray cautiously asks, walking next to her.

"Whatever do you mean?" Y/n asks back, not glancing once at her friend.

"Mh... you're using that tone, for one." Lucy Gray nudges her, "and... you're kneading that dough as if you're chocking it. I'm pretty sure it's dead."

Y/n doesn't answer right away, she keeps kneading the dough, when she puts it in a bowl she turns to her friend.

"I'm okay." She finally says.

"Something bothering you." The singer gently takes her hand, guiding Y/n to sit with her at the table.

"Are the others sleeping?" Y/n asks, wiping her hands on a towel.

"Yeah, now tell me what's wrong." She softly urges her, "is it about tomorrow? Are you nervous or something?"

"I guess..."

"Why?" Lucy Gray asks, "do you fancy my mentor?" She tries to joke and teases her.

"No." She quickly answers, "no, really, I... it's like there's something off about him... I don't know, maybe it's just me."

Y/n lets out a heavy sigh and looks at Lucy Gray, who looks conflicted herself.

"I... uhm.." she starts, uncertain.

"What..?"

"I felt the same way when I met him... he would ask so many question about you, our life here you know, I could see he wanted to know more and more about you." She explains.

"Me? Why?" Y/n gets even more nervous.

"I think he saw you at the reaping ceremony, when you sang and... I don't know, you caught his attention."

"Oh..."

"We can cancel... or you can stay in, I don't want you to feel forced to go because I didn't think." Lucy Gray takes her hands again, reassuringly.

"No, it's okay... I mean maybe we're just looking too much into it..." Y/n shakes her head, "I kind of want to see if you and the other one move to the next step."

"You noticed.." she blushes slightly.

"You two where smiling at each other like crazy." Y/n smiles sweetly at her friend.

"He's sweet, I saw how he wanted to help the tributes during the games... but please, we don't have to go if you're uncomfortable." She checks.

"I'm fine, I promise." Y/n kisses her hands to assure her, "maybe it's just a misunderstanding. It'll be fine."

"Oh now you're comforting me?" Lucy Gray teases.

"Obviously." She smiles proudly, "how about you... how are you coping with... with the games?"

Lucy Gray's smile drops slightly, looking down at their hands, squeezing them a little tighter, scared she would be taken away again.

"I'm okay... sometimes I feel like I'm still there." Her eyes fill with tears at the memories, "I killed people, Y/n... I..."

"You can't just shake it off, right?" Y/n guesses and Lucy Gray nods without saying a word, "I won't say that I'll understand, I will try sure, I can't promise I will be able to of course, but... I'm with you, Lucy Gray, you're not alone, I won't let you deal with it alone."

Lucy Gray stands, and so does Y/n, she brings her into a warm hug. They hold each other like never before, they hugged in the past sure, but nothing like this. This hug is filled with comfort and safety, something they both need, they don't even want it to end in fear one of them could be taken away again.

"We should get some sleep." Y/n states with a chuckle, but doesn't break the hug.

"Yeah." Lucy Gray laughs, "I think we should." They pull apart, "Sorry, I really needed that."

"So did I."

With that little comfort from each other they can finally go to bed and get some sleep. Even though, Y/n can't really fall asleep so quickly, her mind constantly going to Coriolanus Snow and his eyes, his stare on her. Could it be possible that they're just imagining it or it's true?

She close her eyes for a second and the moment she opens them the first light of day greets her, making her groan.

"Fuck." She mutters out, uncovering herself and getting seated, not so ready to start the day.

"Morning." Lucy Gray's harsh morning voice greets Y/n in the kitchen as she prepares the basket for the picnic, "Did you get some sleep?"

"I did, do not worry." Y/n replies, "just... uh..."

"What?"

"Don't leave me alone with him, okay?"

Once Lucy Gray nods, Y/n gets back at the basket.

--------------

"This time of the year the water is just perfect." Maude Ivory excitedly jumps towards the lake.

"She loves the lake, if you can't tell." Y/n jokes.

"I wouldn't blame her," Sejanus says, "I'll trust her judgement, then."

"You should!" The little girl tells him, loud.

"Are you sure you don't need help?" Coriolanus offers to carry the basket for the tenth time, "I promise it's no trouble."

"And I promise it's fine, thank you." Y/n, once again, denies his help.

Coriolanus can't help the clenching in his jaw, his girl should never, ever, lift a finger. He'll make sure of it.

"We're almost there, anyway. No worries." She tries to chuckle and assure him.

"She's strong." Lucy Gray chimes in, "she never lets me do any heavy work around the house. It's crazy."

"No, well, that's because you're not the best at them." Y/n teases her.

"That's not true!" Lucy Gray laughs, "I got many talents."

"You do... not for handwork."

Lucy Gray gasps, faking offence, while the rest of the group laugh.

"How long have you been friends for?" Sejanus asks, "if I'm not intruding."

"We're basically sisters," Lucy Gray immediately answers, proudly, "our parents died and we got raised by the same person."

"I arrived after them, but everything fell into places so naturally, it felt like I found my family again." Y/n explains, with a big smile.

"Never left each other's side ever since." Lucy Gray takes her best friend's hand as they finally arrive at destination.

"We're here!" CC exclaims and Maude Ivory rushes to get into the water as soon as possible, making Y/n chuckle.

Coriolanus watches her closely, the way she worries about her family, the way she smiles, laughs and shines when she looks at the young ones. The more time he's in her presence, the more he falls in love with her, his desire to make her his growing each moment. His girl, his wife and, one day soon, his first Lady.

--------------

A day at the lake with her family is something Y/n always treasured, and will always treasure. She usually takes a few minutes to herself to enjoy the water, just floating with her eyes closed, she loves how free the stream lets her be.

The Covey always lets her live her peace... at least until it's time to eat, in that moment they would splash her until she gets to shore, earning, everytime, a glare from the poor girl.

And today should be no different, Y/n and Lucy Gray agreed not to make the others suspect their new friend makes them feel a little uneasy. So as Y/n floats on her own, Lucy Gray will try and keep an eye out to let her alone with her former mentor.

"What's she doing?" Coriolanus asks.

"Oh she likes to feel the water on her own." Lucy Gray explains, while Sejanus play with Maude Ivory, "to enjoy the moment."

"Wouldn't she be carried away by the stream?" He wonders.

"Nah, it's like the water knows where she should be."

"That's beautiful, Lucy Gray." Sejanus comments.

"Not my words." She is quick to specify, "hers."

Coriolanus spent the rest of the bath watching her, purposely ignoring his former tribute's stare. She probably wants to protect her friend, he thinks, but he's the only one who can protect her. And that he will.

"I'm starving!" Maude Ivory exclaims getting out the water towards the picnic blanket, "c'mon!"

Almost in an instant the rest of the Covey follows, apart from Lucy Gray who stays with Sejanus and Coriolanus, and Y/n floating not far.

Coriolanus shots his friend a look to tell him to get Lucy Gray away so he could have some time alone with his girl.

"I..." Sejanus stutters out, "I... I brought something. I know you two cooked for us too, so I wanted to bring something as a thanks... for the invite."

"Aaww but that's very sweet of you. You didn't need to." Lucy Gray almost melts at his words.

"I can show you. I mean they're preparing to eat so might as well help them." Sejanus suggests.

"Oh... uh... I mean..." she is hesitant, looking briefly at Coriolanus and at her friend.

"Coriolanus is here to look out for her, don't worry." Sejanus reassures her, but he doesn't know that his friend is the reason she needs to keep an eye out for Y/n.

Unfortunately, she knows she can't refuse, not without raising questions from her family nor suspects from the two peacekeepers.

"Yeah... Okay." She finally says, "but I mean, you don't have to, she's always does that. You can come with us."

"I don't mind." He's quick to reply, "I too enjoy the waters myself."

"See? No troubles at all." Sejanus smiles at her.

"We will call you soon, anyway." Lucy Gray tells him, she means it as a warning, even though Coriolanus doesn't register it that way.

"We'll be here." He smiles charmingly as always as he looks at the two climbing on the wooden deck and towards the Covey. She still watches over her friend.

As Coriolanus finally can enjoy the view he can notice her floating gently towards him.

'The water knows where she should be' Lucy Gray said, and the water is bringing her to him.

Y/n felt something touching her hand slightly, startling her.

"Oh sorry." She starts to apologise, but freezes when she sees Coriolanus in front of her.

"No need to apologise." He softly says.

"Where's everyone?" She asks.

"Preparing for the picnic." He tells her, secretly enjoy how her eyes don't meet his.

"Oh... I guess.. uh... I guess we should join them, then." She nervously chuckles, wanting more and more to not be alone with the Peacekeeper.

"Did you enjoy the water?" He asks, ignoring her suggestion.

"I... I did." She answers, "I love days like this."

With each word she slowly swims to the deck.

"I've never done this, you know." He says swimming closer.

"You don't have lakes at the Capitol?" She chuckles, again to hid her nerves.

"There's no room for nature." He simply says.

"Oh... that's... sad." She comments, feeling genuinely sad about that, "hope you're having a good day then, Mr Snow."

"Please, Coriolanus is more than fine, or Coryo... if you like." He tells her with a charming smile, internally begging her to say his name.

"Well, I hope you're having a good day, then, C-Coryo." She forces herself to smile, slightly letting out a sigh of relief when she realises she got to the wooden deck.

"The best in a long time." He catch up with her, ready to chivalrously help her climb up.

Y/n tries to be as quick as she can, but in doing so her foot slipped and she falls back into the water... in Coriolanus' arms.

"Shit..." she curses under her breath.

"You okay?" Coriolanus immediately asks, concerned.

"Yeah, yeah, sorry, I... I slipped." She tries to subtly wiggle out of his arms. While what Coriolanus wants more is to hold her even closer. "We should... uhm... get to the picnic or.. or they w-will eat everything."

"Yeah..." Coriolanus eyes constantly switch from her eyes to her lips, "probably."

He doesn't move an inch though, his eyes keeping the same route, but moving his face closer to hers.

Y/n is cornered, she wants to freak out, but he's still a Peacekeeper, who knows what he could do if she rejected him badly.

"Uhm..." she tries to come up with something to say to get out of the situation.

He's living his dream, in the meantime, he's so close to kissing his girl for the first time he wants to enjoy every second of it. His hands find their way to her waist, caressing it.

Y/n shakes, she wants to run, hit him and run away. Coriolanus interprets the shaking as shyness, he's sure she feels the same, he thinks her shaking is only in anticipation of the kiss.

So he leans closer... and closer...

"Guys!" Lucy Gray's voice saves her, "it's all set!"

"We're coming!" Y/n shouts back immediately, turning away from Coriolanus as she feels his grasp tightening slightly.

Y/n manages to climb back up and misses the frustrated clenching in Coriolanus' jaw.

--------------

They sit on the blankets they brought as they eat, Y/n managed to take a seat in between CC and Maude Ivory, away from the peacekeeper. Lucy Gray, on the other hand, sits next to Sejanus which earned a teasing smile from her friend, Coriolanus sits next to him as they everyone eats.

"You weren't lying, this is amazing." Sejanus exclaims, mouth full of Y/n's dessert.

"You're being too kind now." Y/n can only shy away from the compliment.

"Told you, she's always underestimate herself." Lucy Gray low-kye scold her friend.

"True!" CC agrees, earning a glare from Y/n.

"It really is amazing." Coriolanus chimes in, "where did you learn?"

"Oh... well, when you have to feed all these mouths, that's what you have to do." Y/n explains, "and there were times where one didn't want to eat, when they were younger and didn't fully understand the situation, so I tried my best in making something tasty with what we had."

"Well, I didn't learn." Lucy Gray tries to highlight her friend's talent.

"That's because you were earning money with your guitar and performances." Y/n replies.

"Even that, not without your help." The singer insists.

"Mine?" Y/n laughs, "what help? You're the one singing beautifully everyday."

Coriolanus assist this playful banter and can't help the jealousy raising in him. He wants Y/n to joke with him like that, not with Lucy Gray. He wants to make her blush with compliments, not Sejanus.

"But you write the songs!" Lucy Gray exclaims, with a big smile.

"Not all of them!" Y/n laughs.

"The most beautiful ones, yes." Lucy Gray shots back.

"Oh shut up!" Y/n throws her friend a piece of bread.

"Did we hear any of these songs?" Coriolanus asks, curious.

"I think so," Lucy Gray answers, "plus the one I sang in the arena it's hers."

"Which one?"

"You didn't watch the games?" Sejanus asks.

"No, I did, I did, it's just that the TV we borrowed was a little broken so we couldn't hear anything." CC answers.

"Pity..." Sejanus comments, "she sang beautifully."

"Not a surprise." Y/n smiles, "so, what song was it?"

"The old Therebefore." Lucy Gray tells her, "you know it always gives me strength."

"That was yours?" Coriolanus asks, positively surprised.

"Uh.. yeah, though, I simply rearranged an old melody." Y/n explains, shaking her head dismissively.

"Told you, walking talent." Lucy Gray grins and Y/n throws another piece of bread at her.

Coriolanus is amazed, she will be a perfect first Lady, the people of Panem will love her. He's more and more realising what a perfect choice she will be.

Y/n rolls her eyes, giving up, earning a triumphant smile from Lucy Gray.

"It made all people in the auditorium cry." Coriolanus tells them, "a real moving moment."

"At least I would've gotten one last good performance before my demise." Lucy Gray says dramatically.

"Don't say that." Y/n immediately stops her, "you're here. That's all that matters."

They reach out at the same time to hold each other's hand, Sejanus looks at them with sweet eyes, Coriolanus only feels jealousy, eyes shooting daggers at Lucy Gray.

Unfortunately the things between Sejanus and Lucy Gray have been going strong. She is so in love, Y/n's never seen her so taken by someone like she is by Sejanus. The down side of her happiness is that the peacekeeper always brings his friend around. Coriolanus, in fact, insisted and convinced Sejanus to bring him everytime he visited Lucy Gray, and Sejanus, being the good friend he is, he was glad to help his best friend. They even managed to leave Coriolanus and Y/n alone, Lucy Gray too distracted by Sejanus to notice the deception. Y/n doesn't want her to notice anyway, she's happy her friend found someone she actually like, so she's going to endure a little longer for her, Lucy Gray deserves some happiness after all the horrors she saw.

That's why Y/n's now cooking in their kitchen, with Coriolanus watching her like a hawk.

"What are you making exactly?" He asks from his spot by the small table.

"It's... a apple c-cobbler." Y/n softly answers. He would listen to her soft voice all day if he could, saying his name, begging him.

"Do you need any help?" He offers, "you know I don't mind."

She hears him standing up and walking closer to her.

"It's okay, you don't ha-" she stops mid-sentence, Coriolanus' hands softly caressing her hips froze her.

"I don't mind." He whispers into her ear, thumb striking the clothed spot.

"No... uh... i-it's o-okay... uh..." she stutters, looking around for a way to get away.

"Or maybe... " he spins her around so he's looking directly into her eyes, "we can adress... this." He motions between them, getting even closer, bodies now against one another.

"Uh..?" Y/n is confused.

"Us." Coriolanus specifies, "I don't think we can ignore it any longer."

"Uh... I don't... know..." she's at loss for words, "what..?"

"I'm pretty sure, my interest is pretty obvious." He says this almost shyly, bringing a hand up to cup her cheek, "and... I think yours is too."

"My... interest?"She shakes her head, putting her hands on his arms to try and push him off, "Coriolanus..."

"I love it when you use my name, Y/n." Coriolanus says, leaning closer, ignoring how she avoids his eyes and pushes him away.

"Just..."

"Y/n!!"

"Shit.." he mutters under his breath.

"Where are you?" Lucy Gray asks.

"In the kitchen." Y/n answers, relieved Coriolanus stepped back.

"There you are." She enters the kitchen and immediately hugs her friend, Sejanus close behind her.

"Hi." He timidly says, then notices Coriolanus by the table, "hey Coryo, didn't expect to see tou here today."

There's tension between them, Lucy Gray turns her head to look at the blonde and her face drops.

"Is everything okay, Lucy Gray?" Y/n puts a hand on her friend's shoulder, reassuringly.

"Yeah, of course." She shakes her head and smiles brightly again, "what are you making?" She changes subject.

"Uh... apple cobbler." Y/n says softly.

"Mmmhh can't wait." She hums.

There's something off about this situation, since last night's performance at the Hob all three of them have been behaving weirdly. Lucy Gray was singing and after the song she went after Sejanus and Coriolanus, she was goon for some time and when she got back something in her eyes was off. She tried to wave it off, but Y/n knew her friend and she was sure something happened. Why Lucy Gray didn't want to talk to her only added to her worries.

Unfortunately the worst was yet to come.

--------------

"What do you mean you have to leave?" Y/n asks, getting more and more agitated.

"Mayfair and Billy Taupe are dead, who do you think will be blamed?" Lucy Gray snaps back as she keeps packing a small bag.

"But you didn't! How could they prove otherwise?" Y/n insists, breathing heavily.

"The mayor will surely find a way." Her friend days bitterly, then turn to look at her in the eyes, "listen, I'll be fine. This is the only way."

"How will you go, uh?" Y/n challenges, "alone in the woods."

"I... Coriolanus said he would help." Lucy Gray answers, emotionless.

"Coriolanus?!" Y/n whisper-shouts, "do you trust him?"

"I don't have much of a choice. I told you what happened, he's involved too. That has to do." The brunette sighs deeply, "you all can join me in time. I wish you could come too now, but-"

"It will draw too much attention and we would be too easy to find." Y/n finishes her sentence, "I know... but Snow?"

"I told you, he's involved too... he's the only option. Plus... I don't have anything to keep me here anymore.."

Y/n sighs, giving up, she knows Lucy Gray is still grieving Sejanus. She walks to her friend, stopping her to hug her. Lucy Gray returns the hug immediately, crying on her friend's shoulder. Y/n, then, holds her tighter, stroking her back reassuringly.

"We'll be okay. And we will join you soon." Y/n whispers. "I promise."

--------------

It's been almost a year since Lucy Gray ran away, a year since Y/n saw her friend. She hopes Lucy Gray is fine, moat importantly she hopes her friend is alive. It was hard to explain the situation to the rest of the Covey, especially the youngest one, but she managed.

A good thing about this situation is that it's also been a year since Coriolanus Snow has been seen in district 12. Rumours has it he got back to the Capitol, Y/n wishes, whatever is the truth, that he stays as far away as possible. One of their last interactions scared her so much she hardly left the house in fear of simply seeing him.

Y/n is walking back home with her basket in hand, she sold all the jewellery and cakes she made to earn some money so she was quite content as she enters the house.

"Is anyone home?" Y/n yells as she puts down the basket and takes off her patched-up coat.

"In here." A voice calls from the kitchen and Y/n is quick to walk there, freezing on the spot when the figure of Coriolanus Snow stands in her kitchen. His hair grew in this time apparently, the new haircut makes him look even more dangerous, "Hi, my love."

"Uh..." Y/n doesn't know what to do, having him in the house after all this time feels worse than a robe around her neck, "what... what are you doing here?"

"You don't seem happy." Coriolanus states, confused.

He spent a year thinking about Y/n, working hard and constantly so he could come back to 12 and take her to the Capitol. He's been thinking about her, analysing each of their interactions to the bone. And he realised something: Y/n is yet to realise the love they're destined to share, but Coriolanus is more than willing to help.

"I... I'm confused... why... why are you here? Is Lucy Gray-"

"I don't want to talk about Lucy Gray!" He snaps.

Y/n flinches and takes a step back, he sighs deeply and pass a hand through his hair.

"I'm... I'm sorry..." she apologises, not wanting to anger him more, "you... uh... you let your hair grow..."

That seems to please him, he slightly smiles, pride growing in him.

"Yeah," he walks closer to her, "I wanted to leave the Peacekeeper behind, to welcome the future president of Panem."

"Future president..." she gasps out, slowly retreating backwards, "wow.."

"You're even more beautiful than I remembered." He brushes a strand of hair behind her ear, "I missed you."

"Why are you here?" She asks, pushing his hand away.

"I'm here to take you to the Capitol with me." He simply answers, as a matter of fact.

"What?!" She exclaims, pushing him off and putting distance between them.

"You're coming home with me." He states.

"I am home." She firmly says, noticing the clench in his jaw.

"No." He shakes his head, "no, you're not."

"I'm not coming with you." She insists, "I have people to take care of."

"They will be taken care of, if you come with me." He makes sure to emphasise the 'if'.

Y/n now realises no one else's home.

"If? Coriolanus, listen-"

"No, you listen." He interrupts her once again, "there's no thinking to do here. You're coming with me, period. You come with me and your family will be cared for, if you don't... there would be consequences."

"Is that a threat?" She shakes in fear now.

"It's a promise, my love." He gets closer again, putting a hand on her cheek, "so... what do you say now?"

"You already decided... what's the point of asking, then?" She's tearing up, too scared to move.

"Say you'll come with me." He leans closer, brushing his lips against hers, "say it."

She shakes her head, lips sealed.

But Coriolanus doesn't waste any more time, he kisses her, she backs away but he chases her until her back hits the wall forcing their lips together once again.

He kisses her, but she doesn't kiss him back, the hand on her cheek moves to her neck squeezing, as a warning. She tries to push him off, but he is stronger than her, his other hand moves to her hips pulling her closer and she starts to actually struggle.

"S-stop." She manages to stutter out.

"Give into me, my love." He mutters against her skin, kissing down her neck, "come with me, you'll want for nothing more in your life."

"No..." she weakly says, as she keeps pushing him off.

"Yes." He kisses her again, completely leaning his body against her, caging her.

"Please don't... Please." Her crying only turns him on more, he thrusts his hips against her making her feel his hard-on.

Y/n stops her movement, dread in her veins prevents her from doing anything.

"Sshh, let me take care of you." He whispers into her ear, "let me show you how good I can make you feel."

"Please... no..." her breathing gets heavier and heavier as she looks at him kneeling in front of her, "Don't."

She looks at the door, wanting to flee and leave him behind.

"Don't you dare." Coriolanus orders, looking up at her, "you try to run and I'll make sure your family pays. Am I clear, my love?"

Y/n averts her eyes from the door, to the former peacekeeper kneeling in front of her.

The hunger in his eyes is enough to make her feel like a prey being caught.

He keeps looking at her as he lifts her dress up her legs, and when he pulls her underwear down he finally break the eye contact to take a proper look at his prize.

He licks his lips and gets closer to her core, inhaling her scent.

"Stop... please Coriolanus, stop." She tries again, but her plead falls to deaf ears.

Coriolanus at hearing his name coming from her he dives himself between her legs, licking and sucking all he could, finally enjoy whatever he's been dreaming about all this time... since that reaping ceremony.

Y/n gasps when he attacks her pussy with his mouth like a starved man, she looks around hoping to find something to use as a weapon or a way to escape this. She puts her hand on his head in an attempt to push him off, but it's no use, his hold is way too tight and strong for her to pull away.

"Mmhhh" he humms against her, her taste inebriates him completely.

"Shit.." she groans, her body betraying her, getting closer and closer, "shit."

Hearing this Coriolanus only doubles his efforts, he blindly grabs one of her hands and moves it to rest on his cheek.

"Mmhhh yes." He humms again, licking harder on her clit.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" She tries to hold back, but it's like she has no control over her body anymore as she comes on his mouth. Her legs weakening and falling to the ground, right in front Coriolanus, face to face.

"I love you." He whispers, catching her off guard by kissing her deeply and forcefully.

She puts her hands against him, never stopping her attempts.

"Stop, stop." She mutters.

"This is just a taste of how I'm going to take care of you." He explains breathlessly, "I'm never letting you go, my love."

They stay still for a moment, Y/n too scared to move and Coriolanus is simply enjoying the moment.

He finally got his girl, but he's always being certain of it, after all it's in his family.

Snow lands on top.

[dissapointu]

You write so fast omg 🫣 So I'm back with more ideas

Reader who has a terminal illness(Anguish??👀) , she is a doctor who tests herself and is responsible for finding several cures for people with diseases

She loves helping people since she can't help herself, a scenario with Viktor(come back home my love), Jayce, Silco and haimerdingers would be amazing <3

terminally ill doctor who helps others but struggles with her own illness. The characters Viktor, Jayce, Silco, and Heimerdinger

Viktor

Viktor had always admired your brilliance, your unyielding desire to save others despite your own condition. But lately, the look in your eyes had changed. There was a weight in your gaze, something that betrayed your struggle. He noticed the slight tremor in your hands when you reached for a vial of medicine or the way you would pause in the middle of a conversation, your breath catching, as if the Anguish was threatening to pull you under.

His heart ached for you, knowing you’d dedicated your life to saving others, finding cures, and yet the very thing you couldn’t cure was yourself. The guilt he felt for not being able to fix this—despite all his work in the field of science and technology—was unbearable.

One evening, as you sat hunched over your desk, surrounded by papers and vials, he entered the room quietly. “Come back to bed, my love,” Viktor whispered softly, his voice a balm to the storm in your chest. His words weren’t just an invitation to rest—they were a plea for you to let him take care of you for once.

He carefully approached, kneeling beside you and gently brushing a lock of hair from your forehead. “I know you don’t like to stop, but you’ve done so much. Let me help. Please, rest.” He reached for your hand, bringing it to his chest where his heart beat just a little faster than usual. “We’ll find a way to cure you, together. I promise.”

Jayce

Jayce had never been one to let anyone shoulder the burden alone. He admired your intelligence and dedication, but seeing you slowly fade, despite all your efforts, was a painful reminder of his own helplessness. He’d watched you push through your illness, continuing your research as if nothing had changed, always putting others before yourself.

“Why?” Jayce asked one day, his voice thick with frustration. “Why do you keep pushing yourself so hard when you know how much it’s costing you?”

You glanced at him, your tired eyes soft but filled with quiet resolve. “Because I can’t help myself,” you whispered. “But I can help them. And that’s enough.”

Jayce stepped closer, his hand cupping your cheek gently. “It’s not enough, not if it means losing you. Please… we need you here with us.”

With a heavy sigh, Jayce wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a tight embrace, his words muffled in your hair. “Come back to me, okay? Let me take care of you. Let me share your burden.” He held you like that, as if he could shield you from the world’s cruelty, even though he knew the weight of the situation.

Silco

Silco was a man of control, of power. He didn’t let weakness show, and he certainly didn’t allow himself to rely on anyone. But when it came to you, he was different. He could see the toll your illness was taking on you, and though he would never admit it outright, it terrified him. He couldn’t afford to lose you, not when you had become such an integral part of his life. Your brilliance had helped him in ways no one else could—fixing things, offering him solutions he could only dream of. But it hurt him to see the woman he cared for slipping away, even though you would never ask for his help.

One evening, when you collapsed into a chair, too weak to continue your work, Silco’s voice was low but intense as he approached. “You can’t keep doing this. Your research won’t matter if you’re gone.”

You looked up, and his piercing gaze softened, though only for a brief moment. “I’ll find a cure for myself, just as I’ve done for others,” you said, a determined yet fragile smile on your face.

“Let me help you,” Silco’s voice was quiet, almost as if the words pained him to say. He rarely asked for help, but for you, he’d make an exception. “You don’t have to carry this burden alone. It’s killing you, and I won’t let it take you from me.”

His usual coldness was replaced by something raw—vulnerable—and for a moment, you saw the man he truly was. You didn’t have to do this alone. Silco would ensure that.

Heimerdinger

Heimerdinger’s heart broke for you. He had always seen the potential in you, admired your intellect, but seeing you slowly weaken because of your condition was more than he could bear. He knew there was nothing he could do with his current knowledge to help you, but that didn’t stop him from wanting to try.

He often stayed up late with you, pouring over research, working through theories, hoping that somehow, together, you could find a way to fix this. But he knew the truth: even his vast knowledge of science couldn’t change the fact that you were slipping away. It was a cruel irony that someone so devoted to saving others was unable to save themselves.

One night, after a long day of research, he found you sitting quietly in your office, gazing out the window, exhausted and defeated. He quietly approached, his small hands trembling as he placed them on your shoulder.

“You’ve done so much for this world,” he said, his voice gentle and full of emotion. “I only wish I could do more for you. You’ve worked so hard, and I fear it has cost you everything. But there is still hope, as long as you’re with us. We will continue looking for a solution. Together.”

Heimerdinger paused, glancing at the papers on the desk before returning his gaze to you. “You don’t have to fight this alone.”

[baylz]

CHAPTER ONE: sneaking out

main masterlist | now playing: See You Later, I'm Gone by Robert Lester Folsom

present time

Sneaking out through the bathroom window wasn’t uncommon. She had done this on more occasions than she can count whenever things just weren’t going so great. Bad dates, her high school reunion, family gatherings, and now she was currently shimmering through a window to avoid her ex boyfriend and best friend.

It was ungraceful, to say the least. Her dress had gotten ripped in the process and y/n silently prayed that she could fix it later. Trudding back to her car, she stopped dead in her tracks to see that it was getting hooked to the back of a tow truck.

oh, fuck.

“Hey!” She sprinted and attempted to get the attention of the large vehicle. The driver came to a stop and rolled down his window, a cigar in his mouth and looked every bit of uninterested in what she had to say.

“Listen pretty lady, your clown car was parked infront of a fire hydrant.”

“Cl-clown car?” She spuddered, completely taken aback. “It’s a Volkswagen Beetle.”

“Yeah, well you can come pick up your beetle tomorrow at the shop.” Y/n cautiously looked around the dark street and back to the trucker. It was the middle of autumn and she had just become aware of the goosebumps forming on her exposed legs. A gust of wind blew passed her and she shivered from the contact.

“Well—” She took another look at her surroundings. There weren’t many people around this part of the city which was a bad sign. Walking home in an empty area like this she would surely get grabbed or followed. Shooting a helpless look at the man she asks, “How am I suppose to get home?”

“You can’t call nobody?” Oh, right.

She embarrassingly pulled out her phone and scrolled through her contacts. Yamaguchi was a no-go since his car wasn’t working right now and Tsukishima always has his phone on vibrate. Fucking asshole. The only person left was…”Kuroo.” She could feel the life being sucked out of her as her thumb hovered over the call button. The thought of doing the walk of shame back to the party didn’t seem so bad compared to hitching a ride with her pesky boss.

Unfortunately, her prayers were heard because the screen turned black before she even got the chance to call him. She mentally cursed herself.

The trucker grew impatient at this point, putting the vehicle in drive and moving forward. Y/n pleaded with him to at least let her hitch a ride but he stubbornly refused. And then, he was gone.

Y/n was slowly making her way down the sidewalk, ocassionally looking behind her. She wearily watched each car that rolled passed her and made sure to keep a safe distance between her and the street. She continued this for a good minute before she noticed a car slowly trailing behind her. Her pace sped up and the car followed suit. She began to panic now. Y/n didn't know whether to run or act as if she didn't see them. It wasn't until the car began getting closer that she bolted.

The car chased after her. Y/n made beeline for a nearby alleyway, hoping the lose the stalker. She ducked behind a dumpster and waited, heels in each hand, and ready to attack. A car had stopped at that moment and the sound of a car door shutting caused her to be on high alert.

They’re coming.

She listened patiently as the footsteps drew closer. Her grip tightened, hands trembling with fear. 

Tut!

Closer.

Tut!

Closer.

Tut!

NOW!

“Hello, is anyone there—OW!” Y/n stood from her hiding spot and threw her pumps at the perpetrator. He stumbled back, broken glasses falling to the ground. “Fuck, Y/n.” The stranger grumbled in pain.

“Who are you? How do you know my name?” She probed, pointing her other heel at the fallen man. She did her best to be intimidating but the not subtle quiver in her voice betrayed her.

He felt around for his lost frames before staggering to his feet, putting them back to where they belonged and faced her.

He held his hands up in surrender. “It’s me. Keiji.”

"O-oh." Surprised but also relieved, she dropped her shoe and let out a ragged breath. She didn't know how long she had been holding it in. Her legs almost gave out from the adrenaline wearing away, leaving her a shaking mess. Akaashi attempted to reach out and help but Y/n braced herself on the brick wall instead.

Keiji couldn’t do much except collect her scattered shoes from the dirty cement. Akaashi was aware that he had frightened her so he didn’t dare move an inch when he asked, “How about I take you home, hm?”

The car ride was quiet and Y/n stared out the window at the passing buildings. New York was always so much prettier at night. Despite its downsides, the city was just more lively and active once the sun had set. Everyone is constantly on the move and you never feel alone because there was always someone walking right along side you whether they were going to the same destination or not.

Keiji would occassionally glance at the brunette next to him, trying to think of what to say first. I mean, what could he say? How are you? Sorry for scaring you? He didn’t see anything good coming out of those. She wouldn’t even look at him so he wasn’t even sure if she wanted to talk to begin with. Akaashi braced himself, clearing his throat and straightening his back. He didn’t even get a chance to get a word in before you said, “Stop here.”

Akaashi parked infront of a small duplex. “Thanks for the ride and sorry about your glasses.” Y/n unbuckled her seatbelt, not even looking at him once. He searched for what to say as a response, but it was too late because she had already exited the car and was making her way towards the front door. He watched as y/n entered the house and leaned his head back against the seat once she was gone. "dammit."

NEXT CHAPTER

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© BAYLZ 2024 | PLEASE DO NOT COPY, TRANSLATE, REPOST MY WORKS ONTO OTHER PLATFORMS TO CLAIM AS YOURS

[cobaltperun]

One Last Time

Tara Carpenter x female Reader (Request @ortegalvr)

Part 2 of One Time Too Many

Masterlist

Word count: 1.8k

Crying in your arms was… as ridiculous as it was, the moment she needed. She cried her heart out, lamenting what was lost, what could have been, holding on to you, clinging hard, and you let her. You, against your better judgment, held her just as tightly, held her together because you both knew if you let go for even a moment she would fall apart, crumble, never to be whole again.

“I’m with you, no matter what kind of relationship we have, you can always count on me,” you told her, whispered it into her ear.

Her knees buckled, legs unable to hold her weight, but you held her up, tightened your hold on her and supported her weight. Once again you supported her like you did countless times, and she let it slip through her fingers. How she wished she could kiss you, love you, but she no longer had that right. Even this, being held by you, felt like more than she deserved.

She kept weeping, embarrassed by her emotional outburst, but she couldn’t stop it. As hard as she tried, she only made it worse, damn near triggering her asthma when she tried to hold back the sobs. “Don’t hold it in, Tara, let it all out,” you encouraged her, you hand gently rubbing circles on her back, the way you used to, the way she loved. “It’s okay, I got you.”

Tara let it all out, no longer trying to stop herself as she cried in your arms. At some point you took her to the couch, letting her sit down and lean on you. And when that was done, when she released all of her emotions, when you brought her breakfast and lemonade, when you were absolutely sure she was well enough, you drove her back to her apartment.

She felt empty as she unlocked the doors.

“Tara!” the relief in Sam’s voice as she ran up to her and hugged her, and Tara felt like she didn’t deserve it, Sam’s love, your love. She needed to fix this, to get her life together. “I was so worried,” Sam muttered, her face buried in Tara’s hair, holding on with desperation and helplessness Tara hated.

Sam gave her space to breathe, to take her time and overcome her issues, no matter how much it hurt Sam to do so. And Tara kept hurting her sister, the only family that ever cared about her, as well.

“Sammy? Can we get rid of any alcohol in the apartment? Even the one we use for cooking?” she asked, her voice still a bit hoarse from all the crying, causing Sam to pull back.

Tears of relief filled Sam’s eyes and she once again pulled Tara into a tight hug, one that Tara returned this time. “Of course, of course we can! Okay? No more alcohol for you or cigarettes for me, we’ll both quit it,” and that was the beginning. Tara would get better, for Sam, for you, and for herself. Even if it was too late to fix your relationship, even if she broke your trust one time too many, she could still make an effort to improve her own life, regardless of her relationships.

~X~

It's been over two months since Tara slept in your apartment, since she cried her heart out in your arms. You heard from Sam about the effort Tara was putting in. She didn’t drink one drop of alcohol since that night, and you were proud of Tara, but you felt like you couldn’t go to her, congratulate her properly, tell her just how happy you were for her.

In your mind you couldn’t stay by her side and help her get to this point while you were in a relationship. So, you didn’t have the right to support her now, especially when she didn’t reach out to you after that night.

“Talk to her!” your best friend, Chloe, yelled at you as you worked on the assignment.

“Drop it,” you sighed, sometimes wondering why you even told her anything in the first place. She wouldn’t shut up about you and Tara getting back together.

She scoffed then blew at the strand of her long, wavy, blonde hair that fell over her eye. It fell right back annoying her further. “She’s great for you, dumbass! You were happier than ever!” she exclaimed, absolutely not dropping it, as you politely requested moments earlier. “Someone else will swoop in and win her over.”

You felt a vein popping on your forehead as your shoulders tensed and you turned to glare at her. “Fuck off, Chloe,” you were pissed, not even using Chloe’s nickname this time. You made a mistake though, in your anger and need to avoid an argument you went to grab a glass of water, only to come back and find the blonde menace on your phone.

“There, you have a meeting with Tara in half an hour, she’ll come here, I’m leaving, bye!” she just ran out of your apartment while you stood there, frozen, stuck between anger and panic and murderous intents toward your traitorous former best friend. “You owe me a month worth of food!” she yelled from your front door.

“I owe you a rope around your neck!” you yelled back only to hear a very distant, but undoubtedly loud, from the middle of the building hallway, for every single one of your neighbors to hear, ‘Kinky!’ coming from the bane of your existence.

Well, the damage was already done, so you just sat down on the couch, glass of water long forgotten as you waited for Tara to knock on your doors.

A bit less than half an hour later you heard knocking on your door, and you were absolutely not right in front of it for the past ten minutes, absolutely not! Anyway, you took a deep breath and opened it, and seeing Tara, after all this time, sober, completely sober, looking beautiful, though a bit shy, like she’s been standing in front of your doors for some time as well, it just brought the memories of your relationship right to the forefront of your mind.

“Hey,” you both said at the same time, chuckling lightly as you invited her inside.

“You, you wanted to see me?” she asked as she sat down on your couch, and you sat down on the other end of it. The three feet between you felt like an almost insurmountable distance.

You looked to the side and glared at your phone. “Chloe sent the message. I’m sorry about that,” you admitted and heard Tara’s breath hitch. “I did want to see you, I just, I guess I wasn’t sure how to approach you,” you clarified. “I felt, actually, I feel like I didn’t support you enough, that maybe if I was more patient, you would have stopped drinking sooner,” there, you said it all.

“Y/N,” her voice cracked, and you turned to look at her. “You were more patient than I ever deserved you to be,” Tara told you, causing you to swallow hard.

You shook your head, not entirely believing that to be true. Yes, you couldn’t stand alcohol, but maybe if you tried to approach things in a different way, maybe Tara and you would still be together. Because here was your proof that Tara could quit drinking. “Tara,” you tried, but the words were stuck in your throat as she closed the distance, and you saw her moving to hug you, only to freeze at the very last moment. “Fuck, just come here,” your voice shook, and you pulled her in and the tension disappeared from both of you in almost an instant. Much like she did for months while you were together, Tara sat on your lap, her weight, the heat of her body, her arms around you, everything about her made you calm, at peace.

“I missed this, so, so much,” she whispered as she leaned her forehead on your shoulder, clinging to you hard. “I know I shouldn’t, I know we aren’t together anymore,” she continued, unspoken words hanging in the air as you both, deep down, wondered if there was a way to rebuild the relationship. “Y/N,” she swallowed the lump in her throat and pulled back a bit, so she could look you in the eyes. “I wanted to fix myself, for you, for Sam, for myself, I had to do it alone, to prove to myself I wouldn’t go back to drinking the moment I come across an obstacle,” she told you, and you caressed her cheek, wiping a stray tear from her cheek. She cried every time she saw you lately. When you broke up, two months ago, and now today.

“I still should have been there for you, telling you how proud I am of you, and not just telling it to Sam,” you told her, and she smiled, that beautiful smile that won you over thousands of times.

“She told me, it kept me going when things got hard,” she leaned her forehead against yours. “I can’t ask for it though,” she said.

“For what?” you asked softly, the distance between your lips slowly decreasing.

“For one last chance,” Tara told you and parted her lips when you brushed your thumb against her lower lip.

“Do you still love me?” you just needed to hear her say it.

Tara’s eyes told you everything, that there was no one she’d love the way she loved you. “With all my heart. I want to be with you,” she answered and you lowered your thumb, closed the distance and captured her lips.

The reaction was instantaneous. Every feeling you tried to hold back for almost half a year came back, stronger than ever, as your lips danced together, as Tara pressed her body against yours, removing any distance between you, as her hand snuck up to the back of your head, and her other hand clutched the back of your shirt. You kissed her, desperately, pouring all the need and desire into the kiss, caressing her cheek and holding her. You kept your arm on the small of her back, pulling her closer to you. But as desperate as the kiss was it was soft, filled with love, almost as innocent as your first kiss.

And then you parted for air. The conclusion was clear. You’d try, one last time, to make it work, and you’d try as hard as you would need, because you never wanted to let her go again. You wanted to stay with Tara for the rest of your life. And you saw those feelings mirrored in her eyes.

“I love you,” you told her. “I will always love you.”

“I will always love you too,” Tara said, kissing you once more.

[laukern]

NOT PROOF READ

Sypnosis: satoru, your fiance, ditched you on your date and you get mad. That's it.

Part 2 is up but it's not fulfilling trust.

You never minded the bromantic shit they did honestly. But privileges are not always limitless, even if he were the strongest it didn't give him the right to ditch your date that you planned WEEKS ahead for his 'bff'.

You've been sitting patiently in the new catcafe that opened up just recently, looking at the clock every now and then, fixing your sundress which you specifically picked to match his oceanic eyes. He was late.

You had hopes.. so you waited

2 hours went by. Hah. Must be traffic.

4hours. Okay maybe he's getting yelled at by yaga again... stupid satoru.

6hours and you were done, the sun had already went down and the employees were looking at you weird. On god you heard somebody pity you through whispers

"Aww looks like she got ditched"

Just when you were gathering your things to fucking leave, you heard a ping. As pathetic as it was you wished it was satoru and as mean as it was you wished for him to either be dead or seriously injured to have had ditched your date.

Toru : *sent 6 pics*

Toru : look ml , sugu took me to this super cool carnival thing. The deserts were SO GOOD, coming home btw <3

So.. he forgot.

At moments like this you swore you would've stayed calm but this date was marked on the fucking calender for God's sake, it wasn't some last minute hang out.. it was a fully planned date that you were looking up to since satoru and you had not been able to see eachother because of your busy schedules.

You walked inside your shared apartment, sighing to just... let this disappointment pass and talk to your beloved about it but as soon as you entered the living room your anger went through the roof.

Satoru and suguru, in a very suggestive fucking pose(jk they were about to kill eachother). With what seemed like YOUR makeup spread all across their stupid faces.

Now normally you'll beat their asses and make them clean the whole room but this time you just stared at them, barely being able to handle your overwhelmed nerves.

They looked at you with fright evident on their faces. Shit.. they were done for.

They waited for you to get mad but nothing happened i mean their limbs were still attached so they looked up at your.. trembling figure? Wait what.

You've had enough. Unable to control your anger but also unable to get mad at them, you did the next best possible way to let it out.. you cried.

Panicking satoru stood up and quickly ran to you.

"Baby, w-why are you crying?? I'm sorry, was that kit your favourite? I can buy you a new one, baby please don't cry oh I know-"

"shut up."

....

"What?"

He looked confused and you were loving the look of helplessness on his face. Is that how you looked when you were waiting for him in that cafe?

"Are you guys-" suguru tried to calm the tense air surrounding everyone.

"I said shut.up." You gritted your teeth, hands fisted.

"Babe we're so-"

"don't you get it? I said SHUT UP" You yelled, You didn't mean to but you did.

"Woah woah okay y/n , calm down. Talk to us." suguru tried to comfort you.

But you were never in the mood for peace.

"Talk?? HAH about what?? The fact that MY fiance ditched me ,forgot about our date and went to fucking make out with the guy he sees almost everyday while I have to literally make an appointment to see him TWICE a week." You yelled whatever your brain could comprehend.

Okay maybe you were exaggerating it a bit but they deserved it anyways because that's how you felt.

Your ears rang , eyes glossy and you were trembling so fucking bad. Turning away you stomped to your bed room and shut the door with a long bang.

In the living room, satoru looked just as shocked as suguru disappointed.

"Fuck.."

A/n : I wrote this In a hurry cause the idea was slipping sorry 😬😬 also please be totally honest in the comments if you have to, I just want feedback. English is not my first language and this is my first fic so forgive and complain 🫶

[opencommunion]

"We decided to come to this farm because we could not find any other place to go to," said Rafat Lukman, whose family of 32 includes newborns and small children. "We came here thinking that we can put up with it for a few days, but this war has taken much longer. I cannot believe that my own children are sleeping in cages where chickens slept. I look at them and my heart breaks for the childhood I am giving them. But what else could I do?" From inside the chicken cages, the children can easily spot the Egyptian-controlled Rafah border with its high walls covered with barbed wires. "My daughter took her teddy bear with her when we evacuated the first time. She'd kept it with her the whole time," Lukman said. "But the other day, it rained and the farm flooded. She was sleeping in the cage and her teddy fell into the rainwater and got lost. She cried so much about it the next day. And again, her mum and I felt so helpless. We can't even get her a new teddy bear." Lukman's children say they have become used to their new reality now and it is difficult to remember that one day they had a house and bedrooms. "We are still lucky that we are not dead and that our parents are alive," Rafat's 12-year-old daughter, Mais, said. "But to be honest, I still feel scared sleeping in the cages. They are very cold and dark at night. I have always hated insects, but they are everywhere here, and I cannot do anything about it." In central Gaza, meanwhile, displaced people have also been living in squalid conditions due to overcrowding in shelters - which include schools, hospitals and mosques - and lack of basic services, including clean water, sanitation and a working sewage system. Abu Ahmed Jaber, a father and grandfather, had been sheltering in a UN-run school and decided to go back to his house that was bombed one afternoon while the family was home having lunch.  "The situation in the schools is horrible. They are overcrowded. No toilets, no food, no water and no privacy whatsoever. So I decided to come back with my family to my bombed house and live in whatever space was left standing," Jaber told MEE. When Israel bombed his house, smoke engulfed the family, blackening the afternoon light. "We thought we were dead," Jaber said. The elderly man and his sons pulled out their pregnant sister and her one-year-old daughter from under the rubble with their bare hands. The family fled to a school for shelter, where his daughter bled for hours before an ambulance was able to make its way to them. Despite their traumatic experience, Jaber, who suffers from heart problems and diabetes, made the decision to return to their destroyed home in Bureij, in central Gaza, because he felt that all other alternatives lacked dignity. "This is my house. How can I let go of it? I literally built it with my hands stone by stone. I look at it 20 times a day and I struggle with the fact that I cannot even rebuild or fix anything," said Jaber, in a voice full of sorrow and anger. "I cry every night. I cannot even sleep anymore. If I fall asleep and wake up for any reason, I cannot fall back asleep. I am living a very primitive life amid the rubble, but I would rather do that than leave my house and evacuate from one place to another like chess pieces. And what for? What have I and my family done?" ... Palestinians in Gaza are living today what their grandparents lived over 70 years ago, and the fear of never being able to return is at the heart of their concern. "If the house is destroyed, the land is still there, and it is mine. I would rather die here than live another Nakba like my family did before me," Jaber said.

17 Feb 24

[makeyoumine69]

Starfall (commission)

— PAIRING: Patrick Bateman x Fem!Reader

— SUMMARY: Ever since he was a kid, Patrick always had everything he wanted. Always egoistical and entitled, he always took everything he had for granted. But what happens when one day his entire world falls apart when he receives a call?

— CONTAINS: Patrick Bateman's POV and no other warnings in order to avoid spoilers!😏

— WORDS: 2.3k

— A/N: Writing Patrick's POV was such a rollercoaster experience for me, so I want to thank a person who asked me to write this commission. Love you guys, I hope you like it!💗

— LINKS: [MASTERLIST] [COMMISSIONS] [AO3] [buy me a coffee]💓

The sudden knock on my office door made me frown in annoyance, as I was in the middle of listening to the new Phil Collins tape. Slowly, I removed my headphones and turned to look at Jean, her expression was something between sorrow and shock. 

"What is it?" I ask, straightening my red tie.

"P-Patrick... I got a call from..."

Jesus, why do women always need to be so slow?

"A call from?" I repeated, crossing my arms in a mannerly way, without missing a chance to check my gold Rolex.

"From the hospital." She blurted out quickly before dropping her head.

I still didn't understand why she looked so sad, so I leaned back in my chair and let out a tired sigh.

"So you interrupted me because some asshole dialed the wrong number?" I pointed at my phone, enjoying the way she got embarrassed. "When I have a break, it means I don't exist to anyone, even you, Jean. How many times have I told you that?"

"It's about (y/n)," something heavy fell in my stomach. "They called to say that she got in a car accident, and they found your office number in her wallet."

Her words hit me harder than a truck, and I could swear I felt my blood freeze in my veins from the creeping fear. Fear of losing you. I stood up before even thinking about it, my hands shaking, but I tried my best to keep my cool. 

"Patrick." Jean muttered as she watched me put on my coat.

"Where is she?" 

"Can I come with you? I want to help."

"WHERE IS SHE?" I didn't even notice my voice getting loud, but when I saw Jean's frightened glance, a shaky breath escaped my lungs and I closed my eyes for a second. "Sorry."

"I... it's okay, I understand." She carefully handed me my scarf, which had accidentally fallen, and I hadn't even noticed. "I wrote down the address."

In addition to my scarf, she gave me a piece of paper with her note, I could barely control myself now that I realized what was happening was real.

"Thank you, Jean." I mumble, buttoning my coat and taking my briefcase. "For everything."

The taxi ride took only 20 minutes, but to me it felt like an eternity, and when I finally saw the outline of the hospital, I let out a nervous breath and got out of the car. I paid the taxi driver double what I had to, but I didn't care.

With every step I took, my heart was about to burst through my rib cage, it was beating so fast that it even hurt, and I felt so helpless and miserable under the weight of circumstances that I found it difficult to even open the main door.

Inside the hospital, time seemed to stop for me. I looked around, trying not to panic, and rushed to the reception desk, almost bumping into a nurse on the way.

The receptionist noticed my anxiety and overtook me, asking in a calm voice, "How can I help you, sir?"

"I... I'm looking for (y/n). I was informed that she's here." I said hesitantly, leaning on the reception desk.

"One moment, please." The middle-aged lady replied, fixed her glasses and picked up the phone to make a call.

To be fair, I tried not to listen to what she was saying, doing my best to distract myself from thinking about the worst, as if the worst hadn't already happened. Fuck, I'm such a mess.

"Sir?" 

I shrugged at the receptionist's voice and cleared my dry throat. "Sorry. What did you say?"

"The patient you asked about. Her condition is stable now, but she's in a coma. And we can't say when she'll—" 

"Can I see her?" I interrupted, my emotions finally taking over.

The lady sighed, but said nothing.

"Please," the grief and despair were eating me from the inside, and I was about to lose myself at any moment. "I need to see her and talk to the doctor!"

"I completely understand your feelings, sir," she held out her hand in a reassuring gesture. "I'll see what I can do. Please wait here."

In a few minutes I was walking down the long, dimly lit corridor, accompanied by several nurses. I had never been more scared in my life, I could feel my heartbeat pounding against my ears as my blood rushed through my veins as if I were about to jump off the top of the Empire State Building.

When one of the nurses stopped near the door to what I assumed was your medical room, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a few seconds. No, I was not prepared for what awaited me behind that door, but was it possible to be prepared at all?

Suffocating, I managed to open the door and walked in, all my insides tightened the moment I saw you lying on the hospital bed, your face looked so peaceful, even with the oxygen mask on, you were like a sleeping beauty.

At first I didn't know what to do, so I just stood by the door for a while, and only then did I dare to approach your small, motionless form. Cautiously, as if afraid to wake you up, I sat down next to your bed and I thought my eyes were already beginning to water.

"Hello, dear." I murmured sadly, slowly running my hand along the edge of the bed. "I... I'm here now, and everything's going to be okay. I promise you."

I felt stupid because I knew you couldn't hear me, but still, my urge to assure you that everything would be fine didn't seem strange to me. I brushed away a single tear that ran down my cheek, which you always loved to stroke, and looked at your face, wishing for a moment that I could remove this mask and press my lips to yours. I damned myself for not doing it more often when you were around. God, why did I always have to be so stubborn and arrogant?

"(Y/n), you've always been so kind to me, and you've never asked for anything in return… and I probably didn't appreciate it as much as I should have." I paused when my trembling hand found yours, and then I stared down at it. Every time I noticed how tiny your palm was compared to mine, it made something inside of me quiver.

Cursing myself, I sobbed pathetically and squeezed your hand. "And you never tried to change me or fix me, you accepted me as I am, but... but you never knew what terrible things I did! Jesus!" I was getting hysterical, but now I could no longer hide my emotions. Hateress cursed through my body, burning me like a glowing iron. 

"I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry that I wasn't completely open with you! I just didn't want you to know all the shit I've done in my fucking life!" As I continued to confess, both my arms now wrapped around your fragile frame, I laid my head on your chest, feeling your steady breathing. "Please don't go... I can't do this alone."

The beeping of the medical equipment mixed with my own whimpering, and the whole word seemed to be reduced to this small medical room, where a psycho like me was drowning in the swamp of grief.

"Maybe I'm a sick guy, but I need you more than I ever imagined," I gritted my teeth in disgust. "God damn it! I'm so fucking selfish, even now I only think about myself... I'm so fucking—"

The sound of the door opening made me almost choke. Hesitantly, I fixed my disheveled hair and wiped away my tears before turning around to see a guy who was probably a doctor, and I expected nothing but the worst. When I noticed his relaxed expression, I frowned and almost pleaded:

"Tell me she's going to be okay."

The doctor paused and looked through the papers in his hands. "According to our tests, we expect her condition to get better in a few days."

A small drop of sweat fell from my forehead the moment I heard those words. With a sigh of relief, I quickly got up from the chair and stumbled over to the doctor.

"Thank you," I managed to say, trying to shake his hand, but my body did not seem to listen to me. "If you need anything, let me know. I'll do everything I can."

The doctor nodded. I sat next to you again and mumbled that you were going to be okay. The way I was talking reminded me of the times when you couldn't sleep, and I lulled you by telling you stories where we would run away and finally be alone together. In the end, that would happen, I wouldn't let anything take that away from us, and even if I had to go to hell, I would do it. 

"I'll always be here, love," I murmured, kissing the top of your palm. "Please come back."

One of the reasons I was really proud of my apartment was the view, even if it didn't overlook the park, you loved it and that was all that mattered. 

Trapped in my thoughts, I stood next to the wide window in my living room and watched the night city through the open blinds. I could still feel your sweet scent on my skin, I could still hear the lewd sounds of us making love just a moment ago. Smiling, I closed my eyes and returned to the pleasurable images in my head, even though you were only a few feet away, lying in my big bed, I already missed you, but I would never tell you that.

I didn't know how long I stayed like this, but when I noticed your half-naked figure in the doorway of my bedroom, I gasped because I couldn't resist how beautiful you were, especially when you looked at me like that, with your deer-like, devoted eyes.

"Can't sleep?" You asked me, yawning a little and hugging yourself.

I grinned again, hiding my hands in the pockets of my gray sweatpants. "I'm just trying to understand why do you find this view so special," I crooned in a seductive voice. "But since you're awake, maybe you'll explain it to me?"

You gave me a mischievous grin, and I didn't even have to beckon you over as you slowly approached me, wrapped your elegant arms around my torso, and I purred in response. I didn't really like hugs, but when it came to YOU, it was a different story.

"Well, usually at night you can see some shooting stars," you murmured, still pressed against my chest. "And every time it happens, I make a wish."

For God's sake! Your naivety and innocence always struck a chord in my heart, making me grin like an idiot, though I was glad you couldn't see me right now, as I held you close, stroking your back and breathing in your scent, which had become so tranquilizing to me.

"Oh! Look!" You suddenly exclaimed, moving closer to the window. "A falling star!"

"Where?"

"Right there!" You took my hand and pointed to the spot in the midnight sky.

I laughed, admiring how excited you were, sometimes I thought you would never grow up and that was something cute, I could even say I was really jealous because I never allowed myself to act like that.

"Patrick, we should make a wish!" 

"Like what?"

"Just think of something that you want to come true," you continued to bubble, frowning a bit as you probably were thinking about the list of wishes you might have. "Think, Patrick!"

Your childish attitude made me sigh as I rolled my eyes. "All right, all right. I want this moment to last forever."

"Why did you say that out loud?" You suddenly grumbled and broke out of my embrace. "It won't work if you say your wish out loud, didn't you know that?"

"Honestly, I don't believe in such things," I moved closer to hug you again, but you pushed me away jokingly, your pretty lips pouted. "Oh, honey, c'mon! I can't take this seriously!"

"Then I'll leave you here alone to think about it." You stuck out your tongue teasingly and slowly moved away from me.

"Besides, I already have everything I want," I chuckled smugly, feeling a bit turned on by the way you swayed your hips. "You know what I mean."

"Maybe..." You purred, making your voice sound even more seductive, before disappearing into the darkness behind me.

Only with you did I realize that I had always lived for emotions, that I had done so many terrible things because I was a sucker for the adrenaline. And you were my strongest addiction, but not one that killed, but one that freed me from my fears, my demons, my sins.

Shaking slightly, I let out a loud gasp as I felt a searing pain cut me from the inside like a fan of knives. Then I turned back to the window and saw my own reflection. I blinked several times, feeling the tears weeping in my empty eyes.

"(Y/n)?" When I called your name and no one answered, I almost fell to my knees. 

My wounded heart started to bleed, as once again I was alone. Sobbing, I pressed my head against the cold glass and let the tears flow freely down my cheeks. And there was nothing left for me to do but hold on to the warm memories of those days. 

The days when you were here with me.

P.S. Thank you for reading until the end! I don’t have a taglist. You can follow my side blog @makeyoumineagain and turn on notifications to know when I update!

[ddamm]

‘Goodbye’ | What if Y/N died? - Daryl Dixon x reader - TWD imagine fic

(Image found in Pinterest, so, credits to rightful owner)

Warnings: angst definitely, death of a loved one, mentions of pregnancy and childbirth, mild Daryl swearing, might cry so have some tissues at hand

Word counts: 1399 words (I think it´s the shortest I´ve done for now)

Era: at least after S3 Prison era, but no era in particular

A/N: Sincerely I'm not sure how or why I came up with this. I made a draft of this after my evening prayer session. I stayed on the ground for like half an hour after singing worship and crying and then this song came to me… and all I could picture was this very sad moment of the death of a loved one, and Daryl… Somehow I always end up crying when I listen to this song. It has something so emotional about it, something that feels like a goodbye… well, enjoy it and try not to cry haha.

Song: Je te laisserai des most - Patrick Watson

(listen during the whole thing over and over again 👍🏿)

Original banner (without the ‘goodbye’ phrase) from @kimjiho1, in this post

Daryl promised himself he would not shed more tears after Merle's death, but how would he not if she was now the one vanishing in his arms?

Y/N was the love of his life and had become his motive to live. But now, because of them, time was ticking for her, and she'd depart for somewhere he couldn't reach. Somewhere, he couldn't follow her.

Daryl cursed beneath his breath, angry at the situation before him and at the helplessness he felt. His face went pale in fright as he scanned the multiple bite and tear marks bleeding out over her torso and body.

“Shit, shit, shit… Huh… Y-ya dun have to worry, angel. I'll take ya to the doc and they'll… they'll fix ya up. We'll find a way,” he said, trying to stay positive and evading the cruel reality.

“Is everyone— safe?” Daryl's throat dried, and he found it difficult to speak, but he replied.

“Ye... Ye, everyone's… safe, thanks to ya,” he nodded his head slowly as he held Y/N close, parting her messy and scattered hair out of your face.

“I'm– sorry, Dar Dar… I'm always– giving you trouble, am I not?” Her breathing was difficult and slow, and this was scaring the man further as he tried to laugh out what she said.

“Ya ain't gotta be sorry 'bout nuthin', angel... C'mon, we gotta fix yer mess before ya start stinkin' like a skunk.” Daryl tried picking her up from the dusty ground, but she couldn't even feel your legs anymore.

He halted his actions when he felt her grasp on his shirt. Her trembling, blood-stained hand was holding onto him with the few strengths she had left. “I can't… this is it, Daryl,” she said, knowing it was too late for her, but he hushed her words.

“Dun say that. Yer gonna be jus' fine,” he insisted, wishing to remain in his delusion.

“Daryl, please... Take care of Allie...” she had solicited as her last wish.

“I can't.” “Yes, you can; I know you can.” “Y'all can do tha' when ya recover.” He kept bickering. “Dary, you're not liste—” “She's gonna need her mama, I ain't no good with 'em kids; she'll—”

“DARYL DIXON!” She exclaimed, making the man at her side hush.

“It has to be you. You're the—cough, cough, cough.” She spluttered blood over her chin, staining Daryl's face too. But he could only care about her, and with all the care in the world, he wiped her stained face for her.

Once she stabilised her breathing, she resumed. “You're the only one. The only one I can trust this to.” Daryl shook his head, going against her statement. “I-I can't... I wun be able to do tha' stuff on ma own... Being a parent, tha' stuff ain't somethin' someone fucked up like me can do.” His hands trembled in hers while he explained his twisted reasoning on why he wasn't the right person to fulfil her last request, taking care of her baby.

“Daryl, you won't be alone... You've got Rick, Michonne, Carol—” “Ain't the same damn thing,” he replied with a stern, upset voice.

Just a few weeks ago, you successfully gave birth to your precious daughter, Alison, and now, you were vanishing in his arms? Daryl couldn't accept it.

“Yer... different. Different from 'em, different from all, dammit,” he cursed under his breath, frustrated about not being able to word out how he felt about her.

“Yer... ma damn reason to survive! I can't— I can't do nothin' without ya. She needs ya here; she needs her mama. What in tarnation am I gonna tell her when she's old enough to bother my ass with questions 'bout her old hag?” He questioned her with a hint of dread. “You tell her the truth.” “That I let her mama get killed 'cause I was dilly-dallyin' too dang long?” he pressed on a little aggressively.

“Daryl.” She called his name with a serious stare, not liking that he was already blaming himself, but her gaze softened when she saw the look on his face. “I've lost too much stuff, too many folks... I can't lose ya too; I... I need ya, Y/N...”

She quieted down for a while as thoughts invaded her mind, and Y/N felt bad for passing on her role, her responsibility to Daryl as a burden on his shoulders.

He always took care of her (in his own Dixon way). Back in the quarry camp, Daryl had defended her and her late husband many times (more like her) when Shane and Carol's husband crossed the line. She still remembers how his arrow saved her, just in time, from getting bitten by a walker the night before they left.

She remembered how he had comforted her (tried) after the CDC Lab incident and even when they discovered what happened to Sofia. He was the most upset about that, yet he still came to apologise to her too for not trying well enough, because he knew Sofia and she had a great relationship (just like you and Carol).

Now that she thought of it, the number of times Daryl silently protected, shielded, or cared for her without her full acknowledgement was overwhelming. He had constantly been there for her for so long, always stepping in to save or defend her, even before her husband turned. He became twice as protective of her when he learned there was a new life growing inside her.

All that evidence... Yet she continued to deny any attraction to the lone archer, even if deep down she knew exactly what she felt. Her late husband was long lost and gone, but why could she never seem to leave the sense of guilt away? Why did she feel it was wrong to correspond to Daryl's ways of affection?

If she could have, she would have sighed, pitting herself and her way of disrespecting him and his feelings. But nothing can be done now.

“I know you are afraid... Afraid of parenting alone... Afraid of hurting her... But Daryl, that girl adores you already... Even just as a baby, you're the only person she doesn't cry with besides me. The only one I could leave her with when I needed to rest.”

Y/N stretched her weakened hand to meet his cheek, gently caressing his skin, and he placed his on top of hers as his tears and sniffs became more prominent.

“I'm sorry, I can't stay... I have to rest forever now,” she chuckled, trying to ease him, but seeing her faking strength only hurt him more. “You are awesome, Daryl. The fact that you always took care of me proves it. And she knows that you cared for her mama and that you'll do the same for her. That's why she smiles the most when you're around.”

His sobs became more audible. Your words of support and cheering burned in his skin like fire on a wood chunk. And he looked away in shame, not wanting your last vision of him to be his pathetic sadness, proof of his inner weakness.

“Can you, please, care for her while I'm gone?” She asked him one last time. Despite his sorrow, he nodded in silence, granting her peace of mind, as she knew she didn't have to worry no more.

“Thank you, Dar Dar...” “No need for tha', angel.” She assented, agreeing with his comment. She sought his gaze, wishing to speak her mind but found herself troubled, struggling to find the right terms and considering twice whether to fully express them before she eventually resolved to say her final words to him.

“Oh, and Daryl?” He hummed, asking what she wanted. “I love you,” she professed. And that was his breaking point.

His heart was filled with regret for not being there in time, for not staying by her side, for not being truthful with his feelings and telling her how much she meant to him whenever he could...

“I... I love ya too, Y/N,” he replied, dropping a kiss on her forehead.

A final smile came to her lips as her eyes closed and her hand dropped to her side, signifying the end.

Daryl held her body against his, weeping the death of his beloved, as the third time someone he cared for died in his presence, without him being able to stop it.

“Goodbye, angel...”

star divider found in @anitalenia pink dividers post

A/N: So, here comes this that I had been planning for some time but never found enough time to finish (my laptop wasn't cooperating). I don't really have much to say about it but I think I don't like it as much. Maybe I need to re-listen to the song to see if I feel the same way as when I wrote down the idea but idk, it doesn't look good (not satisfied with the ending).

But anws, thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed it.

Take care and God bless!~

𓆩 ♱ 𓆪

support divider from @cafekitsune, in this post

[kakushino]

Protective

Akaza / Hakuji x GN! Reader

He can't stand seeing you get harassed.

Tags: fluff, modern AU

Word count: 0,6k

Masterlist

AN: Written as Christmas present for dear @mamayan - Merry Christmas!

“Honestly…” you muttered under your breath as you gave Hakuji a bag of frozen bean sprouts. He winced as he pressed the bag against his swollen cheek. “I could have dodged that.”

“That was not the point. How could I stand by while you’re being threatened?” He scowled but quickly smoothed out his expression as the dull ache made itself known again. “That’s not who I am, and you know it.”

You did know that, more than anything.

You had started attending Soryuu School’s self-defense classes with your friend as a way to spend time together while also learning something useful. The course was filled with women, though some of them seemed to come only to ogle at your hot teacher - Hakuji. 

Soon after, your friend got too busy to go with you, but you stayed.

In an unexpected turn of events, you got to talking with Hakuji after classes, and you found him to be a kind man with whom you had a lot in common. A friendship bloomed between you in various warm shades of autumn, matching the season outside as you connected. Numbers were exchanged, you chatted, and gave each other baked goods, and before you knew it, it was nearly Christmas. You had to think hard what to give him for Christmas, so searching for inspiration at a local market seemed like the best idea in the end.

Running into him at the Christmas market was not something you thought would happen. It was lucky though, because a few of the market-goers were causing ruckus and tried to… flirt with you. Hakuji stepped in, and that was the story of how he got his cheek punched right before a police patrol intervened - not before getting in a few of his own hits in. 

“You still could have done something rather than - I don't know - take it?” You turned to retrieve a disinfectant in your first aid kit.

“If there were no officers, I would have broken more than just a few noses, believe me,” he told you through gritted teeth. To be honest, Hakuji himself did not know what caused him to have such strong feelings about this. 

Perhaps - there was something about you that reminded him of his late childhood sweetheart, Koyuki. She had died a few years ago unexpectedly, right before he was going to ask to marry her. 

“You’re lucky I live so close, otherwise you would have to fix yourself alone,” you grumbled as you took one of his hands in yours. His knuckles were a little bloody from punching one of the men. It had not been a fair fight, and of course Hakuji was not going to use his full skill range against helpless civilians, especially not in front of the police. The line between self defense and assault was a thin one. 

The warmth of his palms felt scorching against your colder hands - it was as if he was branding you with himself, the thought making blood rush to your cheeks as you cleaned the torn skin.

Hakuji couldn’t look at you while you worked. You were too close, and he was tempted to-

He did not want to start dating based on that ‘something’ resembling his old love. It would be a relationship doomed to crumble from the start. Yet he couldn’t deny being drawn to you, his student in self-defense class and... friend.

“Of course I’m grateful… Thank you, pipsquea- ow!” 

Excess alcohol dripped down his fingers, Hakuji fought not to clench his fist shut or flinch back. Grimace marred his pretty face even as the liquid evaporated, leaving behind a stinging sensation. Despite all this, he felt at home - safe and comfortable in your hands.

“Hmpf!”

The nickname always made you huffy; it only pointed out how much weaker than him you were. He couldn’t help but like it though. He wanted to protect you and keep you happy.

Oh-

Hakuji understood now. The only way you reminded him of Koyuki was what kind of feelings you evoked in him.

It was Love.

He was in trouble.

Fuck.

dividers made by the amazing @benkeibear

network: @enchantedforest-network

[headcanons-n-shit]

Hello

Your newest post reminded me i had an idea. The bois comforting wol who is having a nervous brakedown from all the stress. Bonus Ardbert.

I really like your stories. Especially the angsty ones.

(TAZ The Breakdown plays in the background)

(Mild shadowbringers spoilers)

Thancred literally (accidentally but still) disassociated so hard from the stress that he gave up his body to the bad guy for a bit. If anyone gets what youre going through, its probably going to be him. Hes not going to waste his time on empty platitudes: hes going to get you a glass of water, a warm blanket, and a hot meal, and let you cry it out on his shoulder for as long as you need to.

(And if that still doesnt help, well. Sex is still on the table. Its rarely a good idea, but hes all out of those.)

Urianger is probably breaking down with you lets be real. Every future my mans has ever read has included world-ending catastrophe, and, sure, youve thwarted it every time (usually with his help) but. What if this time you dont? What if this time you fail???? Its an unreasonable amount of stress for one man to be carrying. He probably does a fantastic amount of fantasy weed to cope and still all it takes is seeing you break down for him to also start blubber-crying.

Graha seems kind of detached and distant at first. "Shower water food" he commands you, in the voice of Lynas grandfather the Crystal Exarch, firm and uncompromising and impossible to disobey, and you might miss the way his voice and smile are strained. The way his hands clench and unclench at his sides. Hes never regretted turning back time to help you save two worlds, but. Its times like this that he wonders if he shouldnt try again to give you a happier ending.

Estinien is a firm hand on your shoulder, a steady shoulder to lean on, because he gets it. The feeling of being trapped in your own body, puppetted by powers so much greater than you can imagine, almost greater than you can comprehend... Youre breaking down for the both of you, honestly, because hes spent so long training the iron discipline to resist nidhoggs influence that he doesnt know how to anymore. This is. Cathartic. For the both of you tbh.

Aymeric wishes in this moment, more than anything, that he could just. Just be with you. Out on your journeys, giving you support by your side instead of from a distance. And he knows, he knows, that the support he gives you is important, that his ability to move nations in your favor has helped far more than any single sword at your side ever would. But he bears the weight of a nation while you bear the weight of a star, and that just. Doesnt seem fair to him.

Haurchefant knows that theres some things that hot chocolate cant fix but. Its a good starting place if nothing else. Something warm and sweet right now couldnt hurt, neither would a soft blanket and a roaring fire. He'll sit with you, bundled up together, and just listen if thats what you need. Or he can talk-- he has plenty of embarrassing stories about Artoirel that he hasnt shared yet. Either way, he'll happily help you wipe your tears away when youre done, and then drop a delicate kiss on your forehead.

Stand tall, he says. A smile better suits a hero.

Sidurgu is surprisingly good at this. Or, maybe not so surprising? Rielle is very mature for her age, but shes still a child. He probably does this whole song and dance every other week. And you feel a little bit like a child, the way he bullies you into the shower and then bundles you up in blankets and pushes food at you, but. Beneath the gruff words and scowl you can tell hes worried. Frustrated. This is exactly the kind of injustice that as a dark knight he swore he would fight, but hes just one man, there isnt much he can do about the desolation of the star. But he also needs you to know that he'll always be in your corner. Whether in this little way or if you need him to help you kill a god, he'll always come when you call.

BONUS

Ardbert has never felt so helpless in his life. He cant touch you, cant be a shoulder you can cry on. He cant even fetch you a glass of water. All he can do is stand there and watch as you break apart in your bed in the Pendants, and its. Its torture, worse than anything any ascian could ever conceive.

Still. He does what he can. And if all he can do is sit at your bedside, his hand hovering half-through yours in a mockery of touch while he tells you stories of his adventures, or friendship and triumph and happier times, well. Its the least he can do.

[sorinethemastermind]

Big Feelings Time (again)

In which Corvus tries to be there for Soren, and confessions are shared. #Sorvus

 Corvus had always known that there were some scars you couldn’t see. And he had also known that being good at hiding them didn’t mean they weren’t there. He hadn’t stumbled blindly forward, not knowing what the future might hold. He had known that Soren was scarred. And yet he was still the most beautiful person he had ever met, inside and out. Scars and all. 

 But knowing all of this hadn’t prepared him for any of it. Because knowing and seeing are two different things. And Corvus hated feeling so helpless.

  “I’m so messed up, Corvus.” Soren had said, once he’d calmed down enough to speak. He’d muttered it into Corvus’ chest, leaning into his embrace. “I feel like… like I’m coming apart. Like I’m in pieces.”

 He’d tried to pull away then, sniffing and wiping at his eyes. “Sorry. That’s stupid. I'll be fine.”

 And Corvus had pulled him back in until he stopped being silly and admitted that he was not fine. And then he’d told him that that was okay, because of course he wasn’t fine. 

 “I don’t want you to see me like this.” Soren had admitted, but Corvus had just shaken his head and held him closer. He’d tried to ask him about Claudia then, assuming that’s what this was. And then was when he found out about Lissa.

 “She- she asked about Claudia.” Soren had said after, leaning his head against Corvus’ shoulder as they sat in the supply room. “And Vi- Dad.”

 Corvus could hear the pain in the word. Didn’t know what it meant that he was using it again, whether it was a good sign or a bad one.

 “And I didn’t know what to say. So I just… I just ran away. I ran away, Corvus.”

 He’d tried to comfort him. “You don’t have to be ready to talk to her yet.”

 “I used to dream about her coming back.” Soren had said, sniffing again. “I used to think it would fix everything. But it’s all too broken now.”

 There wasn’t anything Corvus could do to fix it either, he was slowly realizing. He’d known, of course, on a logical level, that Soren’s family would always be a part of him. But with the goofy grin he always wore, sometimes it was easy to forget. It seemed like everyone else had, at least. So he’d offered to bring in the rest of the supplies, because even if he couldn’t do anything else, he could do that. And he had seen what must have been her there, standing by the crates, offering a kid some food out of one of them. 

 And he’d felt foolish when the irrational surge of resentment had swum up inside him, because why hadn’t she been there for her child when he needed her. Except Corvus knew that was stupid. He was only just beginning to scratch the surface of what Viren had been like, he couldn’t blame her for leaving. What might it have been like for her, if Viren had done this to his own son?

She didn’t know that he knew Soren, only that he was a crownguard like her son, so while she did try to ask after him, it was easy to dodge her questions. And after that they didn’t speak. Now, carrying in the final crate of supplies, Corvus found the door to the pantry ajar. 

 He hurried forward, wondering if somehow she could have found Soren, but it was just Ezran. He looked up as Corvus entered, his big eyes worried. He didn’t sound it, though. He sounded almost cheerful as he turned back and continued saying to Soren;

 “-so that’s why I think you should really stay in the lodge and help Opeli out a bit.”

 “I’m a Crownguard.” Soren was trying to say. “I’m not even supposed to leave your side. I’ve already-” “Soren.” Ezran said, his voice suddenly firm. “Stay inside and help Opeli. Please?”

 “...Okay.” It wasn’t like he could argue.

 “Thank you.” Ezran smiled at him. “And Corvus will stay with you.”

 “I think that’s a wonderful idea, King Ezran.” Corvus said quickly, even as Soren was opening his mouth to object. “Opeli can use all the help she can get.”

 “Yes. She really could.” Ezran dusted off his knees as he rose to his feet again. “I’ll be safe, Soren. Don’t worry. There are more guards here now, and Aanya will be with the next contingent. We’re safe here. Just rest.”

 As he walked out of the room he brushed by Corvus and added, softly; “Make sure he actually rests? He needs it.”

 Corvus nodded seriously, waiting for the door to swing shut behind Ezran before sitting on the ground beside his partner.

 “When I imagined us being together, it was never like this.” Soren said softly, after a moment. 

 “You imagined us being together?”

 “You didn’t?”

 “I did.” Corvus admitted. “Often.”

 Soren smiled, but only for a moment before his brows furrowed again. “I always pictured it sort of… peaceful. Cause you’re so peaceful. But I’m all…” And he waved his hands chaotically in the air before letting them fall back into his lap. “And now you’re just stuck picking up the pieces.”

 “You’re not in pieces.” Corvus told him. “And if you are, then I don’t mind helping you put them back together. Isn’t that what partners do?”

 “But maybe you don’t… maybe you don’t want to be-” Soren looked away, wouldn’t meet his eyes.

 Corvus’ heart thudded in his chest, but he took the other man’s hands in his own, forcing him to look him in the eyes as he said; “I love you, Soren. I love every piece of you. And I will love helping you put them back together, if that’s what you need me to do.”

 “You…” Soren’s eyes widened. 

 “I know it’s… it’s only been a few, well, days, really.” Corvus said, barely able to hear himself over the hammering in his chest. It felt like his heart was trying to burst through his ribs and spill out onto the floor. Not that he wasn’t already exposing it enough right then. Years of carefully built walls came crumbling down as he continued, breathless. “But it hasn’t been just days for me. I didn’t stay at the castle for Ezran. I stayed for you, Soren. Because you needed me. And you are the… the most…”

 “I love you too, Corvus.” Soren’s voice was raspy and choked with emotion. 

 And Corvus felt like his smile was too wide for his face, and Soren was beaming at him, his eyes sparkling with a million unsaid things. But they all somehow found a voice when he said it again, softly;

 “I love you.” And then again louder. “I love you!”

 “Soren, people will hear.” Corvus said, some last semblance of sense waking in him. 

 “I don’t care.” Soren said, leaning forward to kiss him. “Because I love you.”

 “But I didn’t mean to make it about me.” Corvus began. “I just wanted you to know that I’m here-”

 “Oh, shut up and just let me kiss you.” Soren teased. 

 So Corvus did.

[goodolddumbbanana]

A friendly hang out (Molten x Sun platonic crackship)

Sumary: They are friends. Or Molten totally nail Sun as his friend. And Sun right now, still a litle bit awakard. Sun still feels uncomfortable when someone cares about him. He likes Molten and also want to be friendly and befriend with the bear. But old habits die hard and sometimes, Sun still feels uncertain whether Molten will be like everyone else, leaving him or stabbing him in the back.

Daycare was as cheerful and lively as ever. The lively sound of music hit Molten's ears, as the bear animatronic moved inside the door.

The children had all gone home, leaving only Sun to clean up.

'What a mess. Oh my god...' Even from afar, Molten could hear Sun's groans. The sun model sat on the ground, surrounded by scattered barrels. The faint scent of antiseptic wafted to the tip of Molten's nose.

Molten's orange-gray fur was even reflected on the plastic, glistening under the bright lights.

'How much detergent did Sun use? '

Molten tilted his head. His metal body covered in wires clanked, yet Sun had yet to notice him behind. A focus and joy that Molten rarely had the chance to witness, especially when the yellow animatronic was always in a state of anxiety or depression.

“Hmm… Argh!! Molten!!? You scared the crap out of me!!” Sun was startled and almost jumped back. An overly dramatic expression appeared on Sun’s face, and their hands unconsciously folded as if to cover their faces.

“Hello, Sun.” Molten replied cheerfully, waving his claws. “Do you want to hang out?”

“Go out?” Sun straightened up, looking puzzled. They shook their heads at him with helpless expressions, and as if they couldn’t understand what he was saying.

“But why, Molten?! I'm kinda busy right now.. and…”

Sun’s hands waved in the air, as if Molten had turned on some kind of anxiety switch in Sun.

“But you have been so busy lately. I just want you to relax a little bit. Is that not okay, Sun?” Molten lowered his head, his claws poking at each other.

“Y–Yes! Of course it’s okay. It’s just… there are people who are busier than me, like Solar, Moon… Laying around just feels wrong… you know.” Sun stuttered, looking more and more like they were about to scream, or faint. “I just want to get out of my head by doing the things I can do the best.” Sun opposes weakly, even though he seems like he didn’t charge for like a couple days. 

Molten genuinely liked Moon. He liked Solar too. They were good people, and they had both helped him a lot. Moon and the Creator had helped him fix his software, and Solar had given him a new body. 

But it was Sun who had given him a little faith into the future, and it was him who truly asked what he wanted or his purpose was. Because if it weren't for Sun, he would still be trapped in Moon's cage, lost in the curse the Creators had placed on him, with a pain of emptiness that could only be released by catching Ruin.

Because Sun looked like a sinking ship patched up with duct tape but still able to survive countless storms. Because Sun knew what it felt like to put all his effort into a meaningless goal, only to get nothing in return, just like Molten had when he sent Ruin into the abyss.

Because Sun was a good person, and Molten didn't understand what that meant, due to the fact his rotten nature, though repaired, would never be complete.

“Why do you think so lowly of yourself, Sun? Because here, I see everyone admiring and loving you?”

Molten had always been a good observer. 

He had seen Earth’s dependent and loving gaze, as she played with Sun like an overly pampered little sister. He had also seen the starry admiration in Lunar’s eyes, and the carefully hidden truth behind Sun’s brother’s indifferent demeanor. He had also seen how Moon’s innate sharpness softened whenever Sun was mentioned, and how Solar, despite his rudeness at times, had something secretly protective atmosphere toward Sun, like trying not to touch an open wound.

Everyone connected to Sun in a different way, and between them, Molten felt a sense of respect, admiration, trust, protection and love.

Molten liked that. He likes Sun. He likes the warm feeling whenever the two of them hang out, the feeling running through Molten's main circuit was almost like wanting, like possessing. It feels full. And it makes Molten feel less cold than ever.

Still, because of that, there was a stream of thoughts that came from nowhere running through Molten's small head, screaming passive rage every time he saw Sun talking or playing with someone else.

Because Sun is his friend, and he didn't like it when his friend was closer to someone else than him.

Because Sun still feels comfortable with others more than with him, and he can’t ever beat them due to the fact Molten is just Sun's new friend, and there a lot of people know Sun longer than him.

Was this strange? Molten's ears drooped. Was he becoming selfish for thinking like that?

Was he a bad person? Molten didn't want to be bad, he was bad and now he wanted to become better.

He wanted to hang out with Sun, he wanted to do more things that he felt like, he wanted to find something he was good at to help people.

"Ha... I guess so." Sun muttered. Their bright faces huddled together, even their shoulders lowered. Compared to someone who was almost the same height as Molten, at this moment, Sun looked really small.

There were many things Molten didn't know. There were many things Molten didn’t understand. But he did know that his friend was sad right now. And perhaps the thing that had distracted Molten would be of some use to Sun?

“Do you want to watch a movie, Sun?” Molten repeated what Sun had said. The yellow animatronic still looked hesitant, but nodded slowly. Their voices were still as tense and shrill as before, but more or less, their backs had relaxed a lot now.

“Wait until I finish cleaning this up, Molten.”

“I’ll help.” Molten clumsily sitting down, his loose strands accidentally bumping into the barrels that Sun had neatly arranged into vertical columns, now falling to pieces.

Sun stared, the look of Sun almost making his non-existent heart cringe before they sighed.

“It’s okay, Molten. You can use that rag over there to wipe it, okay?”

“Yeah.” Molten nodded. In the silence, accompanied by Sun’s pleasant hum, Molten timidly asked.

“We’re friends, right, Sun?”

And Sun… in a minute of silence. Their mechanical wrists were as regular as the hands of a clock. The sunlight reflected their images, reflected Molten’s fur in Sun’s eyes. There was something vulnerable as Sun replied.

“Haha… yeah, Molten. We are friends.” 

[summerlovingbaby]

bad day

Class was a drag, it was neary finals and everyone was stressed and nervous cramming for exams and dragging themselves through term papers before christmas break. Kurro was finished with classes for the day, and went back to his dorm to find his girlfriend splayed out on his bed.

His roommate was gone for the week and spent most nights at his girlfriends, so Y/N spent the night more often than she didn’t. It was Tuesday, and they both had classes basically all day, with minimal breaks in between, with the way their schedules were made they didn’t spare themselves more than 15 minutes for lunch. Y/N’s last class ended at 4:15 and his class ended at 5, so he gave her his key.

She was lying on her back, arms stiff at her side, as she stared at some fixed point on the popcorn ceiling, not even looking up when the door closed, and Kurro announced his presence with a loud hello. He ditched his bag on his desk and walked to his bed, which was lofted high enough off the ground for him to rest his chin on the mattress without having to bed at an uncomfortable angle. 

“ Bad day?” 

She responded with a low grunt, that he took for a yes. Today she took 4 exams and had a 6,000 word term paper due at midnight, and based on the panic text message he got from her after her 2nd exam she didn’t do as well as she hoped. She studied, but what she studied wasn’t on the test at all. She was exhausted, she couldn’t sleep from the nerves of taking the exam, so spent the night cramming and studying. She skipped breakfast out of fear of being late for her first exam, and there was no time for lunch. By the time of her last class she felt so awful she schelped back to Kuroos dorm  to sulk.

“ Did you eat?”

She shook her head, and grunted with annoyance.

“ Do you want to talk about it?” 

She shook her head.

“ Do you want to be left alone?” he asked quietly, surprised when she shook her head.

“How can I help you, princess?” he asked sweetly.

“ Will you just sit with me?” she asked so softly, it almost made Kuroo shatter. He nodded and put his palms on the comforter, and pushed himself on the bed with hardly any effort, and made himself comfortable sitting by her head.

That apparently wasn’t  close enough because Y/N shifted closer to him, getting as close as she could without being on top of him.

“ Can I lie on you?” he asked, rubbing her lower stomach.

He liked laying on her stomach or chest, he liked being close to her, as close as possible, close enough to feel her heartbeat run through his body. Its something she didn’t let him do alot, she was always horribly insecure about the weight on her stomach, and was always hesitant to let him touch her, but he always made her feel loved. She nodded.

He moved, and placed her cheek on her lower stomach, and wrapped his arms underneath her, his forearms resting underneath her lower back. She let her hands fall into the top of his hair, rubbing at his scalp. Kurro had quite the long day too, while it wasn’t as upsetting it certainly was draining, and he relished in the time he spent with her.

“ Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it? It might help,” he offered once more.

“ No, I don’t,” he clucked impatient at her, he hated the helpless feeling that he often felt when it came to her. “ But you being here, it helps, I like to be close to you.”

taglist    

@ lucyheartfilias-wife @esposadomd

[ashistired37]

Yes the nap was refreshing. Let's talk about what I think is going on with Erin!

So. Spoilers for 2-2-32!

sorry most of this is based on speculation but that's the fun of this! If you disagree or think there's something I missed I will very gladly read through it! I love theories even if they aren't mine feel free to share yours <3

Okay so I literally wrote a draft of my theory the night before so I'll summarise it.

Basically I think what's going on with Erin- atleast subconsciously is tied to the backstory theory I cooked up.

I think his soul was either very prone to elemental corruption or the elements were just too much for him to control.

I think maybe using one element like we've mostly seen him do was alright but using it for too long would cause problems. So using them would usually lead to him being bedridden or sick in some way.

Because of this he probably felt powerless in a way. Sure he could use all the elements but he can't do anything meaningful with them without injuring himself (or others depending on how out of control his powers were before the magic tats/seals)

I mean obviously he felt helpless when it comes to helping Tess. He was a child what could he say to his father to get through to him? We don't know much about his parents but from what we know his father was definitely a douche. We know Erin and Tess seem to like/respect their mother and she was probably a Soul mage but that's about it

I think the line about holding him back just meant Tess would TRY to stop him from overworking himself which probably came before the seals. Maybe he kept trying to make his magic work despite knowing how much of a toll it takes or even after he got the tattoos he probably wanted to feel useful now that he could actually use his powers safely. He had to.

This is why I think he's a good person to parallel Kendal. They're both trying to justify their existence by doing.

Kendal with saving Vash.

And Erin by solving problems.

Is it fair to him to assume he can do all that? No. This whole thing really reminds me of the first episode of I think justice league?

I know it was a DC animated show- where in the first episode they assign superman to protect the whole world and when people protest saying he doesn't have enough hands for that he reassures them he will take care of it.

Erin's kinda like Superman in this case- oh wow I never thought I'd say that. But you understand why I draw the comparison. They're both insanely powerful and taking on way more than they can in these instances.

Now I know I mostly used 2-2-30 and 31 but I had to use them so we can get to the 32 stuff.

Him saying no one can help him and that it always comes back yo him to carry the weight because nobody can catch him if he falls as hubouris it sounds it's also. Really fucking sad.

I think he probably had a lot of instances where people expected him to fix things because of how much power he has (probably his father or even fellow students of The academy but that's just a guess) so he internalised it.

"But Atlas didn't you say he probably feels like this because he feels the need to justify his existence so he doesn't feel as helpless?" yes. Because I think it's both. Things mixed together to create the awful storm that is Erin mc hubris pants.

On another tragic note he's been one of the core members for so long. Since like chapter 4-5. This guy has fought with atleast Alinua and Kendal for AWHILE now. He knows they can help but the one thing they can't help him get rid of or solve?

The dragon.

He's right. He's absolutely right but that's only if you think about directly helping. By directly getting rid of it. If you think about helping him more indirectly so he can get the help he needs? They've been doing that since they met him!

Obviously he's not thinking completely rationally if he was more level headed he could probably acknowledge this but I NEEDED to mention this.

I might add to this sometime but I am exhausted I'll see you after ANOTHER nap

[whatyadrawin]

The Fruit After the Flesh 18+ - Chapter 5-

Minors DNI!

Masterlist

Approximately 3,435 words

Pairing: Thomas Hewitt(HeadCanon) x AFAB reader

This chapters Warnings:  Mild sexually suggestive language, mention of medical issue, swear words.

A/n: Wow I had the WORST writers block, I baked a cake and ruminated on the story for a bit until it came back, and I feel right on track again. Thank you to everyone who waited, I will still be busy with schoolwork but I now can continue the fic train! As always, reblogs, likes and comments are extremely appreciated, and I hope you enjoy the chapter and art!

Tag List: @fan-goddess

Chapter 5

The morning came quickly with birds chirping and sunshine beaming into your bedroom, you wasted no time getting yourself ready for the day. When you went to the kitchen to make breakfast you noticed that you had no eggs in the fridge -ugh, I don’t want to make the 2hr drive to the next town for some eggs-, you lean back on the kitchen counter and think, you remember the Hewitts have chickens, -maybe they would let me have some eggs? I used all mine for the cake last night so I guess it’s a fair trade off-. This was a good excuse to try and see Tommy again, so you made up your mind to go visit.

Walking over to the Hewitt house was always a nice bit of exercise to get your legs moving, but the heat from the sun was strong today, and you foolishly didn’t think to wear a hat; your body is not accustomed to the Texan heat and you start to feel dizzy. You reach the edge of the Hewitt property and collapse from lightheadedness, your whole body starts overheating and makes you gasp for air as if you just ran a marathon. You look up at the house and see no one, so you try to call out but your energy levels are too low to make much noise and before you can keep your head lifted, you become so weak you can’t move or speak and instead just lay there, panting and helpless.

Tommy was tending to the cows in the barn, thinking of your smile last night after complimenting your dress, even if it was just a hand gesture. He really wanted to say more about how beautiful you looked but he couldn’t muster the words, he lived most of his life quietly ruminating to himself in his head. No one he had met as a child was kind to him because of the permanent scar on his face from a skin issue that wasn’t able to be fixed until it got too serious; Tommy never liked people looking at his face, the folks that lived in Fuller at that time were all very ignorant and cruel to people who were different than them. For once in his life, a pretty girl was kind to him and even interested in getting to know him better. He didn’t understand why you were nice to him, but he wasn’t one to question kindness, he would rather accept it and hope it lasts.

He heard footsteps crunching up the road near the driveway to his house, Tommy paused his work and looked out from the barn doors to see you shuffling up the road. He could tell something wasn’t right by the way your body was slouching and your feet dragging, he watched in shock as you fell to the ground. With a burst of speed, he launched himself into action, making his way down to where you fell. He could hear a quiet call for help come from you and just as your head lay down, he arrived to your body. He felt a knot in his stomach and kneeled to gently pick you up off the ground and bring you inside the house.

“MAWMA!” he yelled; his booming voice rang through the home.

Luda Mae came out from the back porch hurriedly “What’s goin’ on? Oh lord, is that *Y/N*?”

He raced over to the living room and gently lay you down on the couch, looking around helplessly. Luda Mae came and kneeled down next to you feeling your forehead,

“She’s too hot, get a towel and some ice water quick!” she shouts,

Tommy immediately obeys and runs to the kitchen grabbing the requested items, when he brought them back to where Luda Mae was, she quickly splashed water on your face and fanned your skin to cool you quicker. Tommy stood over you and had his hands up holding the back of his neck, he was so scared to lose the only friend he was able to make that it was making him sweat. With one more splash of cold water, you were able to get the energy to open your eyes to see a blurry Luda Mae and Tommy looming over you.

“I’m so sorry, I don’t know what happened” your voice was weak.

Luda Mae was smiling and happily shaking her hands upward in relief,

“Seems the heat got the best of you, gotta be careful in this weather hun”

You started to wake more, feeling a bit cold from all the water that was splashed on you,

“I really underestimated how strong the sun is out here, I just got so dizzy and weak” you explain,

“Well, yer lucky my boy was out there to collect you before blacking out” Luda Mae looks up at Tommy who was now relaxed with relief.

You feel embarrassed, “Oh god, I’m so sorry I scared you all. I think I need to go buy a hat and some UV protection”

You felt really badly for making them scared, you try to sit up but are still too weak to move and you slump back down. Luda Mae puts her hand on your arm and says,

“Don’t try to get up hun, you should rest here for a bit. Stay for lunch, I have some really moist chicken cookin’ up in the oven”

You feel so weak and tired from the heat so you agree to stay and rest, Luda Mae gets up,

“Don’t you move from there sweetheart; I’ll get you some cold water to drink.”

You respond “I really appreciate your kindness. I was actually on my way over here to ask about getting some eggs until I fainted”

“Ok hun, you just lay down there and try to rest some, you’ll be tired for a while. I’ll get you some eggs before you leave sweetheart.” Luda Mae walks toward the kitchen but turns and says “Tommy, you make sure to keep an eye on her now” she whisks off to the kitchen to get you the water.

Tommy goes and sits on a nearby chair that he barely fits in, he watches you with his chin resting on his hands. You look over at him, he is wearing a pair of really ragged jeans with work boots and only a dirt-stained white tank top. His skin was glistening with a layer of sweat and he stared back at you with his deep blue eyes, his hair was wet and tousled from rushing around, his mask still hid his face. He looked so good; you think about how easily he lifted your body and ran full speed with you in his arms.

“Thomas?” you speak softly, he lifts his head and sits up straight,

You continue “Thank you for saving me, I need to find a way to repay you.”

Tommy’s eyes widen and he shakes his head as he motions his hands downward to signify you needn’t worry about it. -he is so humble- you press on,

“You are such an amazing man, strong, kind, and humble. I just want you to know that I really appreciate having someone like you looking out for me, I haven’t felt safe like that in a long time… in your arms.”

You turn over to try and get comfortable, Tommy was taken aback by what you had said to him, you never fail to make him feel special. He shifted in his chair and rested his head on his raised hand watching you with a smile under his mask.

Luda Mae came back in and placed the water next to you, then she looked over at Tommy who was watching you in a haze of endearment.

She lets out a chuckle “You’re such a good boy, you make sure to get her whatever she asks for. Don’t mind your chores neither, I’ll get Charlie to finish ‘em.”

Luda Mae could tell he had feelings for you, and she would do anything in her power to get you two closer. In her eyes there was no one worthy enough for her boy, until you came, she saw how much empathy you had and how polite you were to everyone it was like you were a missing family member.

A few hours passed and you were woken up by a sweet voice calling your name, Luda Mae was leaning over you and gently placed her hand on your shoulder. You turned over to face her and she smiled saying,

“Lunch’ll be ready in five minutes hun, I just wanted you to be able to wake up slowly. Come on out to the porch when you’re good n’ ready, don’t you go n’ rush yourself now.”

Luda Mae walked off and you looked over to the chair and see Tommy still sitting there watching over you, as you start to sit up, he gets up and moves closer in case you struggle, you raise your hand and say,

“Don’t worry I’m ok, I feel way better actually, it’s as if I never got sick to begin with.”

He waits and watches you slowly place your feet on the floor, you begin to stand slowly but your knee muscles failed to clench and you fall, Tommy lunges forward and prevents you from hitting the floor by holding your waist, you look up at his face which was so close to yours and made you blush feeling butterflies tie a knot in your core; He gives you a concerned look but you are just frozen like a deer in headlights looking at his expressive eyes. He slowly raises you up to your feet as if you were a doll, he didn’t break eye contact and you felt light as air. He loosened his grip on your body and you snapped out of it,

“Sorry, I didn’t realize my muscles also needed to wake up” you let out an embarrassed giggle.

You were able to stand normally, and take a few steps successfully so you tell Tommy you are ok now and he takes his hands away from your waist but follows closely behind you as you make your way to the porch where Luda Mae had a table set and some spiced chicken laid out near a bunch of potatoes and some salad. Tommy pulls out your chair for you to sit in and makes his way over to the barn to relieve Charlie. Luda Mae comes out from the kitchen with a pitcher of lemonade and smiles at you saying,

“How’re you feelin’ hun?”

You smile at her and respond “I’m feeling way better now thanks to you and Thomas, I really appreciate the care and this amazing lunch too, I couldn’t ask for better neighbors.”

Luda Mae laughs and pours you a cup of lemonade,

“Oh hun, that’s so sweet of you to say. It’s nothing I’m sure you wouldn’t do for us if the situation was switched.”

You reply hurriedly “Of course I would help if you guys needed it, no question! I just want you to know I’m grateful to have people who care about me in my life.”

“Well, were grateful to have someone like you around who treats my boy right. We all really like you, Thomas especially; He was so worried about you that he didn’t move an inch the whole time you rested.” Luda Mae took a seat and placed some chicken on your plate.

Charlie comes over to the table to sit down, he shoots a glare at you and says, “Girly, you better not get weak to the sun again, I aint in the mood to do that lunkheads work while he sits and watches you with goo-goo eyes.” He smirks and gives you a wink then begins to eat his lunch. Luda Mae stares at him with an annoyed expression and follows up,

“Don’t get snippy with her, I made Thomas watch her in case she got sick or needed help. Besides, you needed a good bit of work what with how lazy you been lately.”

Charlie gasps “You old bat! Y’know how hard it is to work in this heat? I’m too old now, I don’t need to be trudgin’ about the farm when Tommy’s strong enough to do the work of ten men.”

He continues to eat his lunch and Luda Mae just rolls her eyes “You’re welcome for lunch” she said sarcastically, Charlie just nods and gives a thumbs up.

You look around for Tommy to come eat but he is still in the barn, you ask “Isn’t Thomas going to come eat? He must be pretty hungry.”

Charlie looks at you and responds “He can’t eat the way he wants to with you ‘round here.”

You give him a confused look, Luda Mae adds,

“Don’t worry hun, he’ll get a big lunch later after he walks you home when you’re ready to get going.” Luda Mae gets a big smile on her face and continues, “Would you like to stay for dinner sweetheart? I love having you around, it’s nice having another lady in the house.” She gives Charlie a dirty look.

“That’s extremely generous of you Luda Mae, but I need to get going. I still have more to repair in the house and I want to decide on a paint color to freshen up the place.” You look over to Charlie and ask “What do you mean he can’t eat the way he wants to? He ate dinner in front of me before.”

He looks back at you and says “Y’think he wears a mask for fun sweet thing?” you shake your head and he continues “He’s hidin’ some real ugly under there“-

“You shut your mouth Charlie, you make everything so impolite!” she looks over to you and explains “Thomas had a really bad skin condition when he was a youngin’, it got real bad and we couldn’t get help until it took its toll on his face, the poor baby. He has a bit of a… different face now”

Charlie laughs and adds “Oh for fucks sake Luda, the boy barely has skin left to hide his teeth, he looks like a damn monster without the mask. You baby him like he’s a newborn lamb, last time I checked he’s a fuckin’ mountain!” He looks over at you while crossing his arms and leaning back with a smirk “I bet you don’t care much how he looks underneath, don’t ya girly? You probably like monsters”

You blush and look at your plate, he wasn’t wrong, Tommy could have a frightening face and you would still have a crush on him.

“Yeah, look at her, she’s blushin’ like a schoolgirl.” Charlie gets up and takes his empty plate over to the kitchen but passes by you and quietly speaks in your ear “Be careful sweety, he really is a monster.”

 Luda Mae whacks him with her kitchen towel and he scurries away laughing. She turns to you and apologizes,

“I’m so sorry about him, he’s incapable of behavin’ himself.” She sits back down and says, “Thomas is very handsome, his face underneath is just fine, it’s just a tiny bit scarred that’s all.”

You could barely hear her, your head was swimming with thoughts of Tommy being violent or dangerous like a monster -what did he mean when he said Tommy really is a monster?- The thought of Tommy being like a barely tamed wild animal who could break at any moment was frightening while also being strangely arousing. He was so gentle with you, he didn’t seem like the type to actively go out of his way to hurt someone but then again, you have been wrong about men before.

You ate the rest of your lunch and got up from your chair, Luda Mae got up from hers and said,

“You headin’ on your way now?” you nod and she adds, “Well wait there and let me get those eggs in a cloth for Thomas to hold when he walks you back home.”

You quickly respond “Oh, there’s no need for him to walk me home I’ll be fine, there’s already some clouds over the sun so its way cooler.”

Luda Mae gives you a look of dismissal, “Hun, I’d feel very badly if you got hurt or sick on your way back and there was no one to help you. Never you mind it being trouble.”

She walked toward the kitchen and you head over to the barn where Tommy was finishing his work, he was lifting hay bales into a storage area effortlessly. His huge muscles flexed every time he lifted a bale, and you couldn’t help but just stand there and watch this massive powerhouse sweat and grunt as he worked.

Luda Mae came with a folded cloth that had well over a dozen eggs, in it and called over to Tommy,

“Thomas, you’re going to walk *Y/N* back home. Carry the eggs I gave her and make sure she doesn’t fall.”

Luda Mae smiled and gave you a hug goodbye, Tommy walked over and grabbed the eggs and waited for you to start walking. You thank Luda Mae and make your way down the driveway with Tommy by your side. While on the road, Tommy made sure you walked in his shadow so that the sun couldn’t beat down on you again, you look up at him and you see his eyes squish up meaning he’s smiling under his mask.

“Thanks for walking me home Tommy. You know, I actually really like walking with you, it feels peaceful and safe.”

Tommy was happy to hear you shared his enjoyment, he liked having someone to look out for and protect, it was a nice change from his sordid history of slaughtering people which was something he never liked to do despite being good at it. All he knew was that he didn’t want to ever lose you, his life felt like it had more meaning with you around, as if the dark clouds of his mind were lifted. You were unlike anyone he had ever met and he would do anything for you, he wished he could tell you that.

You both arrived at your door and you took the eggs from him and stood still for a second, Tommy leaned over a bit to look at your face, he wondered why you paused quietly. You placed the eggs gently on the ground and gave Tommy a hug, he was so big you couldn’t even get close to touching your hands together. Tommy was in shock, he didn’t expect you to do that, but he welcomed the hug and closed his massive arms around your back and held you. He was still a bit damp from working and sweating in the heat, but he didn’t smell bad, he smelled like earth, and a musk that was like a spell being put on you. Normally most guys would smell terrible from hard labor, but Tommy smelled intoxicatingly good to you. He let out a relaxed sigh and leaned into you more,

“You really did save my life today, thank you again for being there for me.” You wanted to tell him how strongly you felt about him, but thanking him would be enough for now.

You loosen your hug and he lets you out of his arms gently, you add,

“I better let you go, you still haven’t eaten your lunch yet and I bet you’re really hungry.”

You smile at him and get another once-over on his appearance before he turns to leave. You never felt this way about someone before, he was like an enigma that invaded your thoughts all day every day, but you didn’t mind that. You wanted so desperately to know more about him, and now that you have his scent in your mind, you wanted more of that too. You remember hearing his voice when you were weak in his arms today, he called out for his mom with such a deep intensity, he had a powerful voice and you hope that one day he would be able to speak with you and say your name.

The day moved quickly and you were so tired from the heat that you skipped dinner and repairs and went straight to bed. You wished you could sleep with Tommy in the room again, you would sleep so well feeling so safe with him, but all you could do now was rest and dream of him.

Next chapter-