laukern

[laukern]

some of the 5 stars in genshin I’ve got both on my alt and main (not all of them lol)

these are just the ones I could find screenshoted :3

[laukern]

Dabi does things to me and I've never even watched mha

Dabi is such an interesting character to me. I find it so fascinating how he says that he does not care about some things, how he could not give a single crap about anything that's going on. With his easygoing attitude and flat tone, no one could blame you for thinking that way.

It was one of the many reasons why you wanted to break up with him.

Falling for Dabi to begin with was beyond unexpected. The man positively reeked of trouble. The second he stepped foot in your favorite coffee shop, you know that the only thing that guy could bring was chaos. The way he carried himself was a dead giveaway, even if most of his face was covered. You had no idea that he was a wanted criminal at the time and perhaps that was one of the reasons why you approached him to begin with.

Besides, life was just dull. Nothing was going on in your life, no sparks, no excitement. Every single day started to feel like the same shade of grey, the old colours of the world morphing into something so forgettable that it made you want to pull out your hair. So what if talking to this guy was a possible mistake?

It was better than nothing, you told yourself.

You can still recall his strong smell - smoke with a hint of some cheap cologne, perhaps a vain attempt to cover up that third metallic smell which couldn't be hidden no matter how hard he tried. Beneath that dark hoodie of his you could see his lips twitching and just as he was going to tell you off for bothering him, you introduced yourself.

The rest was, as they say, history.

Dabi was a bit of a weirdo but you didn't mind. You enjoyed his quirks and even liked to compliment his appearance from time to time, which made the villain wonder just how sick in the head you really were.

He never made any moves to shoo you away though.

And that stone cold fact was something which the League would often make fun of him for it. Dabi would usually end their jabs and jeers with an annoyed scoff and just leave the bar, hands in his pockets but no one was buying it.

Dabi wasn't sure if he wanted you near those clowns. The thought of someone else oogling you, in the same manner as he did, set him off. Dabi started to make the effort of seeing you more, whether or not you knew he was actually there was up for debate. He stuck to the shadows, tailing you day and night and he would reveal himself only if he saw fit.

Dabi wasn't sure why he was doing this, wasting his time with some weak little civilian.

When the day had ended and the sun was setting, Dabi would lazily walk back home. His mind would be rushing with thoughts of you, his knuckles in a tight grip as he kept them hidden in his deep pockets.

He could kill you whenever and however he damn well pleased.

Dabi had the terrifying ability to snuff the life out of you, and that thought gave him a rush of adrenaline, dare he say confidence.

Your life really was in his hands.

You often felt the need to explain away Dabi's red flags - he's just tired, that's why he's so cranky! Oh, he got mad that you went out with someone else? Well, um... There are so many bad guys out there, it makes sense that he would be worried. Because that is what a good boyfriend did - worry about his precious baby.

Dabi was smart (even a little kind) enough to keep his burn scars hidden away from you but the ones on his face were impossible to conceal. The villain would often find himself enchanted by your gentle touch as you'd trace your delicate fingers across the rough flesh, a stark contrast to the sheer softness you radiated.

He was often torn between two options - does he keep that softness safe or will he sink his fangs deep in your neck, claim you all for himself?

Day after day, the second opinion started to sound so much more appealing.

Dabi's love was all over the place. There would be times when you would hardly ever see him. No calls, no texts, no nothing. For all you knew he could have been dying in a ditch somewhere and you'd be none the wiser. You tried countless times to open up to you about his job but he would just shut you down in record speed. He would never get annoyed or angry with these questions but that did not ease your worries.

And with the prying eyes of friends and relatives, it got even harder to keep yourself so delusionally in love.

None approved of your relationship with Dabi. You shed countless tears due to their harsh protests, which often meant that you would run away straight into the arms of the main issue. Dabi would hold you in your bed, his arms wrapped tightly around you. His shirt would be covered in your tears and snot. Perhaps he would grumble about it later but not at the moment.

He was not a good person, but he did not want to be a complete monster towards you.

After these incidents, almost everyone who was ever close with you would start dropping like flies. All died violent, brutal deaths with the main cause usually being severe burns inflicted on the victims of various parts of their bodies. Sometimes the scarring was so deep that even days later the corpse would radiate heat, the disgusting smell or rot forever sticking to your nostrils.

To describe the experience of being forced to identify those bodies as "traumatic" would have been the understatement of the century.

The walk back home was excruciating, perhaps even a little otherworldly. There was no left in the world who cared for you anymore, no one you could run to for safety and comfort.

The only one who you had left was Dabi.

Maybe, it wasn't so bad, being with him that is. Yeah, he could be a little mean sometimes but he would always make it up to you. Dabi would call you his doll and pepper your face with gentle kisses, which often made you giggle. Sure, not knowing what Dabi was doing at the dead of night made you worry so much that you would sob until the cracks of daylight but that was okay because he would always cross the threshold of your home in one piece.

You only had Dabi to worry about, and that was... Odd to manage.

Gone were the walks with friends, meals with family. There was no living soul on this Earth which cared about you, wanted to see you happy and thrive.

Dabi was the only person left in your life.

And that was when the horrible realization hit like a bucket of ice cold water.

Dabi was the only person you had left.

Every single complaint, he had memorized them, each and every one. You knew that this was the case as he would sometimes bring up the most random things you had said months after you said them to begin with, proving the fact that he actually was paying attention.

The door opens with a powerful slam which startles the man. He asks you what's the problem but all hell breaks loose.

You scream, shout, cry. You accuse him of every possible crime he could have committed and he says nothing. Dabi sits on the sofa, his legs crossed as his cheek rests on the palm of his hand. You go on and on and Dabi doesn't bother to stop you.

Not until he lets out a deep chuckle.

Took ya long enough, he said to you. The tips of his fingers ignited with blue flames, a silent threat to keep you from screaming. You couldn't even bolt towards the door and there were no other escape routes.

He finally had you where he wanted you.

Dabi wasn't stupid. He knew that you planned on dumping him for a while now. He could not allow that, not now. Not when you had forced your way deep into his heart and made a home there. Dabi had nothing in this world and he made sure that you had nothing either.

Now, you had each other. And to him, that was more than enough.

[laukern]

FINALLY

❗Hold Your Tongues is now officially up❗

You can go here and download the game!

Make sure to read the warnings!

Thank you so much @celerifleuri you did an amazing job at everything I'm honestly so emotional right now. We worked so hard, started from 0 and managed to finish this, I'm so so happy.

And guys don't forget, the game isn't over yet! We will continue to add bonus content so please look forward to those!

Have fun and I hope you like it!!!!

[laukern]

Yandere pornstar roommate part 2

part 1 here

desc: yandere pornstar x gn reader, mentions of obsession, general assholeness, heavy manipulation, yandere behaviors, want the nsfw scene? Lmk!!

“So.. you don’t see me any differently?” Your roommate meekly asks, his hand incessantly tugging on your shirt as his forehead connects to the side of your arm, did he really have to be this close? Ever since you found out he was a pornstar, he became…

clingy.

Whining for attention, and somehow being more annoying than before. Paired with his usual entitled attitude, it made him almost unbearable.

“I don’t see you differently, you being a pornstar really helps with the bills, I already told you this” You speak with an exasperated tone, because you are, you’re tired of assuring him, you’re 90% percent sure he’s asking repeatedly just to get those small compliments you add on.

“Would… you ever want to be in a video with me?” His voice is so soft, you almost trick yourself into believing that your brain was imagining a corny cliche and filling your head with the wrong words.

“Sorry?”

“A video… for my subscribers? Recently they’ve been asking for me to partner up with other famous people but.. I want the person to be someone I know” He’s so meek, if you didn’t know him then you’d believe he was some virgin asking his best-friend to be his first.

Getting intimate with your roommate sounded like the worst idea you could ever think of. You could write down at least 20 different reasons why on the top of your head. The first one would be the fact that if anything went wrong with the situationship, you’d have to find another cheap place to rent. And having a rich star for a roommate to lend you help with bills isn’t exactly common..

“Please? I’d give you everything we earned for the video… and it’ll be super short! It doesn’t even have to be 20 minutes” His attempts to convince you using this.. odd submissive behavior that he’s never acted like. Maybe this was one of the characters he played in his video.

Because he never acted like this. Ever. He was always loud, aggressive, and entitled.

“I don’t need any extra cash, my job keeps me afloat enough, and making videos.. it’s not really my thing, I can’t see myself doing one” You shake your head, gently moving him off of you, if he kept clinging onto you, this would become out of habit rather than just for begging.

“But, you’d be able to buy more things, don’t you see all the nice things I have? You could be getting triple of what you have right now, just one little video”

He’s getting irritated, honestly, why wouldn’t you do it? You’re usually always looking for a way to make some extra money, but you stop it at having sex with him? Is he not pretty enough? Is he not worthy of seeing you in such a vulnerable way?

What’s wrong with it? You should be agreeing!!!

He’s so fucking upset to the point where this feigned niceness might crumble here and now.

“I don’t care for all that stuff, I just want the bills paid and to have enough for food, you should find someone else to be in your video, I’m sure a lot of people would be excited to help!” You smile gently, trying to be gentle since he’s been kinder ever since you found out his secret.

“You should care! I want to do this with you, I don’t want to fuck some random idiot, don’t you get it? This is honorable! Any one of my millions of subscribers would want to do this with me”

“Then why don’t you recruit one of them?”

Recruit one of them? Recruit one of them??? Are you actually trying to piss him off even more? You should be eager to do this with him, ecstatic, jumping up and down at the fact that he wants to do this with you!

All this pleading just so he’d have the opportunity to fuck you and you don’t even realize his intentions are genuine? You don’t even have a clue that it wasn’t going to be a public video. He feels like a pathetic loser for making up a lie just to be in bed with you.

But this might be the only way he gets to see you, unclothed, sensitive, underneath him with teary eyes asking for more. God he hates how badly he’s turned on yet angry at you, why do you affect him like this? Why is his body betraying his conflicted mind?

“I just.. I thought you’d be up for it since you usually want to buy games and other little things. I thought if you agreed then I’d make my fans happy and I’d grow closer with the only person I have in life” He swallows down the guilt for lying so easily, was he always the opposite of candor? Would he grow more fucked up as long as he got closer to you?

At this rate of deterioration, he could easily have the confidence of killing someone with his bare hands, just so you’d look at him a little longer.

“I want to do this with you, please..” He sulks, holding onto you dearly, looking up with pouty lips and on the brink of tears, hoping you’d fall for it, that you’d believe everything was truly coming from the bottom of his heart with his best interest in mind for you.

“Okay.. okay, I’ll do it, just this once, but if you even try begging for another vi-“

“I won’t! I won’t! I swear! I’ll never even utter a single word about making another video, if my fans swear up and down that they’ll destroy my career if I don’t, I still wont ask!” He gasps, wind almost knocked out of him from the shock, you were really going to do it, with him!!

He was so blissfully happy for the rest of the day, almost forgetting to fumble the camera into place when it was time. It was never going on the internet, that little video would be replayed and replayed on repeat when you weren’t with him.

Another part of him died that day, his morals, the only thing that mattered now was keeping you with him, no matter what it took, even if it went against everything he promised in life.

[laukern]

🛐

Summary: You run into your snobby ex boyfriend after a drunken party. Things go south from there. tw: female reader, hinted murder, possessive behavior, condescension, financial(?) abuse, classism

You know this is a stupid, stupid idea. Going home at God knows what time in the pitch black is never a good idea, you think drowsily, head still spinning from the last beer, but even more so when you're tired, pissed off and tipsy. You're freezing, naked shoulders wet from the chilly midnight rain - but instead of soft damp linden, you smell molden concrete and metal. You fucking hate this city. You hate the stupid, flashy, obnoxious parties for rich people, and this shitty university in the middle of nowhere, and even the scholarship that forced you into close proximity with the freakish upper class of east New Hemptison.

"Baby!" A familiar voice sinks into the muddy darkness and you have to physically restrain yourself from emptying your stomach right there on the street - and knowing your neighbours, you'd have to clean it after too. His steps fasten and soon you feel his hand gripping your shoulder to turn you around. Standing before you, glistening just like some prince from a fairy tale, is everything you despise about this town. The fact that he's perfectly prim and proper despite the pounding rain, that his teeth seem almost pearly white in the dark, that his hair is crisp and slicked away tastefully, that even now he's wearing a fucking Armani shirt with the cheesiest pair of jeans (ones you could never afford) - it makes you want to crawl back to the cave you came from, two continents away, and never look back.

"Baby, where have you been?" He sounds terribly concerned as he pulls your shivering body in for a tight bear hug, running his hands through your absolutely soaked hair - murmuring something incomprehensible to your drunken mind. "I was worried sick, missy." His voice drops slightly, but it's all for show. He's playing the part of the good boyfriend, like always - and you fell for it once, you did, but you know better now. "I called you, like, sixty eight times. And nothing." He swallows, big hands trembling around you. "Just radio silence. I thought something bad happened to y-"

"Oh, f-uucking beat it." Your patience finally snaps and you push him off swiftly, barely contained anger starting to resurface again. Today was supposed to be about you, about healing, about feeling better, but just your luck - the very problem had found you, just like always. No matter where you go, your troubles follow. "You know what you did, asshole. Don't you d-aare play innocent with m-me." You hiss drunkenly, stumbling all over your words before hitting the wall all on your own. Mathew, of course, doesn't waste the oppurtunity to get closer to you - just so he can help you regain your balance, of course. The golden boy of Saint Hemptison would never take advantage of an intoxicated girl - much less his ex girlfriend who he's still hopelessly in love with, supposedly. Right.

"Baby, please, you're drunk - you're not making any sense." The man whispers softly, placing his hand at your hip. "Let's go to the penthouse. We can talk about this in the morning when you are more aware of your thoughts."

When you're more aware of your thoughts? You almost laugh. It's quite bittersweet when it hits you that he doesn't respect you even now - maybe he never has in the duration of your miserable relationshop, that in his eyes you'll always be the poor girl in need of a white knight. Just a little trophy to show off, if a bit broken in certain spots.

"I am not going anywhere with you." You mumble, trying to calm down - to appear cold and collected, the complete opposite of what he wants you to be. "Look, I know that you're mad at me, babygirl, but I'm sure your little temper tantrum can wait until tomorrow. You know I don't like this neighbourhood. Let me take you to a safe place for the night, okay?" He reaches for your hand again, but this time you swat it away in fury.

"Who are you to act so worried about me, huh?" You can hear your voice breaking as the tears prick at your eyes - hot and shameful. Crying in front of him is the last thing you want to do, but god, it's so hard not to when this whole night has been a disaster after a disaster. You're truly at your wits' end. "After what you did? You are truly shameless." You squeal, and admittedly, it feels fucking great to finally say it.

Your former lover's face twists into an unrecognizable grimace as he watches you tear into his heart with ease - and as you turn to leave, he grabs your wrist painfully. This time something is different about his eyes - they're not longer smiling. Now they're two bottomless gray pits devoid of kindness, the same eyes you saw the night of the accident as he caressed your cold cheek with bloody knuckles.

"And what did I do, love? Hm?" He tilts your chin up by squeezing your throat, forcing you to meet his eerie gaze. Suddenly all your tipsy bravado evaporates into thin air. "Please, refresh my memory. I really can't recall the events of the past two weeks - since you've been avoiding me and all..." His fingers dig into your skin and you wince just like a kicked puppy - but he doesn't bulge an inch. Suddenly everything comes flooding back - the touches you convinced yourself were sensual, not possesive, the glances you once thought of as romantic, the constant interrogations, the strange emails, the cryptic calls, the dead roses at your door. "I couldn't sleep - or eat for that matter. I am half a man without you. I lose myself completely."

It all makes sense now. You feel like crying, because it's so crystal clear... and you've been a willing fool. You had closed your eyes, because it was easier to lie than to accept the truth bubbling just under his surface - under the dimples and the smiles, and the hundred jewelry boxes still lying unopened under your bed.

"You - you killed him! You monster!" You gasp, unable to stop your lips from uttering the lethal. You thrash around to no avail, you're stuck. "How could you? Jack was your friend!" You hide your face in the crook of his neck to stop the sobs, too scared to look at the crazed man holding you. He simply rolls his eyes, letting you soak his shirt with your pretty tears. "Don't be so dramatic - it's just some broken bones. He'll be fine... as long as he stays away from my things."

You raise your head shakily - you're drowning between hatred, fear and misery. The adrenaline is making you even more disoriented than the liquor percentage in your bloodstream.

"I am not a fucking thing for you to-" You hiccup, growing woozy as you hit weakly against his chest. The corners of his lips curl up slightly as he chuckles at the pitiful display. "For you to just own!" You keep going, cheeks purple from pent up fury - there's something tearing at your insides like you want to scream, you need it to come out, but you find yourself unable to push it off your flesh like it's been ingrained with glue and a shovel.

"You're wrong, baby. I do own you." Mathew says with the sweetest, softest voice you've heard in your life, sugary and bitter like poisonous honey. "Let's say you want to break up-"

"We already broke u-"

His eyes pierce you mid-sentence. You quickly close your mouth.

"Let's say," He repeats through gritted teeth, holding you so tightly you might just merge into one being. "That you want to break up with me." He inhales deeply, nostrils flaring. "Hypothetically. Then what? You have no place to live. I know you're staying at that shithole of a hotel down the street right now - it's filthier than a brothel, no?"

You want to say something - to argue, to scream. To tell him that he's being a rich, condescending asshole again, that you like the hotel - despite the mold and the cockroaches and the way there never seems to be hot water. Despite having to lock your door four times so you don't get assaulted in your sleep.

You say nothing.

"You don't have to confirm it. My agent tracked you down a week ago. Whatever - you'll run out of money in, approximately, 9 days." He smirks maliciously, with unhidden spite - just like a little devil. "Then what? You don't even have an address. And you know the city hall will take their sweet fucking time to help you register - if they don't make you pay a fine first." He strokes your chin cruelly. "We both know just how much they care about clueless little foreigners with less than a penny to their name." He whispers, twisting the dagger in. "Hell, they may even cut your scholarship. And. then. what." Your ex pronounces each word slowly - making sure you can understand it, feel it - fear it.

You imagine your family back at home. You can hear their voices over the phone, your mom smiling as you tell her about your day, your father asking you what you plan to do after college - whether you will still remember them, whether you'd take care of them once they have nothing left, since you took everything with you. The money, the hopes, the happiness...

"F-fuck you..." You whimper faintly, falling against him. You feel defeated, and the sharp words are all you have left. "Why are you doing this to me?" You mumble to yourself, suddenly feeling drained to the very bone. The man begins stroking your hair as he rocks you gently to the side. "Because I love you." He slowly kisses down your neck. "Because I'm the only one in this city who gives a fuck about you, and-" You can feel his smile against your burning cheek. "Because you're mine."

[laukern]

IM SORRY IM A SADIST 😫😫😫

✧ tags: yandere cheater x reader, angst, yandere, nsfw content

✧ warnings: obsessive yandere behavior, stalking, nsfw content, cheating, angst, creep behavior, jealousy, grabbing, sexual acts

✧ a/n: you guys wanted both the yan royalty and yan cheater so imma do both ‼️ i’ll post the royalty one later cause you guys are in for a treat

not proofread but enjoy! (ty for the love on the last post as well <3)

part 1 - part 2 - part 3

cheater bf who sleeps with your friends behind your back. it’s not like you were anything special anyway, he just tolerated you so he could get closer to some real women

cheater bf who makes you beg for the bare minimum: giving you his jacket, holding your hand during a scary movie, etc etc but does all those things for your friends with a charming smile

cheater bf who says you’re overreacting after he holds your friends hand during a scary movie instead of yours

“hey don’t be selfish, poor girl looked like she was gonna cry. what kinda friend are you?”

you miss the way his fingers trailed up her thighs halfway through the movie when you squeeze your eyes shut. terrified of the unfolding movie scene as your bf comforts another girl

cheater bf who has fucked your roommate in your dorm room bed. oh you’re asking why they look sweaty and tired? they were trying to move your bed cause she dropped something behind it ofc.

cheater bf who finally gets caught a year into your relationship after you walk in on him mid-thrust into your ‘friend’ after they both excused themselves to the bathroom during your hangout.

cheater bf who zips up his pants and runs after a sobbing you to explain but stops half way, what was there to explain anyway? you would be heartbroken yes, but he had got what he wanted didn’t he? ignoring the dull tug on his heart he returns to his dorm

ex bf who throws himself on his bed while thinking about you. finally he picks up the lingering sent of you on his bed and various items that belong to your littered across the room. little gifts to him and cards wishing him happiness. maybe you’d become more intertwined in his life than he thought

ex bf that drops your stuff at your new dorm in a cardboard box, unluckily for you, you open it at the same time and are left staring at each other. like a cat you quickly dart out, grab the box, and retreat after locking the door can’t you just look at him once?

ex bf who feels empty after your breakup, he misses your cooking, your nagging for him to take care of himself, your smiles. fuck. what was the point of being free to fuck whoever he wanted if all he could imagine was you?

ex bf who stalks your socials, irritated that you removed him from your posts and blocked him on everything. and one day when he’s on his burner stalking you, a new story pops up. it’s innocent enough, a picture of you at dinner with a small caption “dinner out”, but then he notices the masculine hand on the table across from you wearing a watch not quite made for a woman.

his blood is boiling. you’re his. his girl.

yandere cheater who scours his room for anything that reminds him of you, finally finding a shirt in the back of his closet that he didn’t find earlier. suffocating his face with the soft fabric, moaning as he sniffed the garment

yandere cheater who hurriedly ruts into his hand as he hold the fabric up to his nose, cock leaking as he fucks his hand to your scent. he cums hard, harder than he had with any of your bimbo ‘friends’

yandere cheater who finally realized what he was missing: you. he caves in and incessantly messages and calls you, showing up at your door to win back your love.

yandere cheater who grows tired, he’s always been impatient. he knows what he did was wrong, especially to an angel like you but everyone deserves a second chance right? after all you were his soulmate

yandere cheater who shows up at a cafe you’re at and sits across from you like nothing is wrong. when you get up to leave, he forces you back into the seat. whispering in your ear to not make a scene. pulling out his phone he reveals intimate pictures of you from your relationship.

“it would be a darn shame if anyone saw these hm? your poor mom would be so disappointed that her dear daughter was just passing these around”

your eyes widen and you beg him to delete them, you’ll do anything!

“just come back to me and all these will be gone”

he grins, to wide to be kind. he wouldn’t send them out anyway. your body was his alone to see. but fuck did it have a effect on you, your big eyes fill with caution.

“please there must be-“ he cuts you off.

“there’s no other way than back to me sweets”

once you shakily get up, he throws his arm over your shoulder, keeping you pinned to his side as you both leave the coffee shop. your hot coffee long forgotten on the table as the chilly air hits your faces. your body further fills with despair as you pass the ally next to the shop, spotting the date you were going to meet. face bloodied and body limp against the red brick.

your ex was always far stronger than you, far stronger than anyone else you had met too. his dedication to martial arts was one of the things that had drawn you to him. but now, his vice grip on you as he guides you to his car isn’t to prove his strength to protect you. it’s to intimidate you into giving in to him

and if you didn’t, there would be consequences.

[laukern]

omg guys!!! i've been thinking about it but like yandere! jirai kei bf >>___<<

he wears pretty clothes and has all these super cool fashion stuff! he has a really cute sense of fashion and is an absolute pretty boy!!! bro is actually loaded with money too and loves to buy you cute plushies so u and him can match :3

unfortunately he's also a bit crazy!

YOU: haha bae ur so funny im gonna go sleep now

mentalhospitalpatient#69: ok babe good night ❤️

5 minutes later

mentalhospitalpatient#69: baby how could u not invite me to sleep with you? r u cheating on me? do u want me to die? u know how much u mean to me i cant believe this im going to breaki into ur house and explode

yeah hes an absolute landmine. u remember there was one time where u didn't say u loved him and he went batshit ballistic CRAZY

YOU: lol ok see u later

mentalhospitalpatient#69: yay >w< see u later bby!! i love u!!

seen at 14:23

mentalhospitalpatient#69: okay i see how it is u dont love me anymore is that it? u hate me? i knew u never liked me i shouldve just gone the kidnapping route n made u mine that way ud never lose feelings for me. the normal route was too risky i cant believe that i actually thought things would work out for once but

YOU: what the fuck vro

YOU: i love u now chill damn

mentalhospitalpatient#69: okay❤️ yay❤️

mentalhospitalpatient#69: actually no why did u speak to me in that tone i knew u hated me im going to burn your house down

you can't believe ur dating someone like him. you know that he overthinks a lot and is... unhealthily attached to you but seriously?? he can't go 5 minutes without a fraction of your time and it's actually making you crazy.

if it weren't for that monstrous dick and his pretty face you probably would have shoved him into the mental hospital.

actually he'd just break out.

"wtf what r u doing here bro u should be in the mental hospital???"

"yeah i broke out because i missed you <3"

...you swear one of these days he's actually gonna act on his words. and when that day comes you'll probably explode and die. stupid boyfriend. you're gonna throw him into the ocean.

[laukern]

sweetheart

Yandere Emperor X Consort! (F)Reader X Yandere Crown Prince(platonic)

милашка-sweetheart according to google correct me if im wrong!

CW: kidnapped, reader is look down upon by the nobles, infantilize, forced pregnancy, dehumanizing, mentions of attempt suicide, false rumor, power imbalance, worshipping, delusional(?)

NOTE: Crown Prince is at the age of 16(he is your first/oldest son). Reader is around 36-38. Emperor is two year younger than the reader. Also I don't speak russian everything is google (the empire is not based on irl russian empire but a fantasy world like the manhwas/shoujou isekai we read) and english is not my first language you can clearly see when you read the story. This is purely a fiction and I do not mean to offend anyone.

I DO NOT CONDONE ANY ACTION IN THIS FICTION.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Running is not ideal for a 5 month pregnant woman like you.

When you tried to seek help from your parents for the first time, they never helped you because who would believe an illegitimate daughter who was frowned upon by nobles.

You are an illegitimate child of the duke and a humble maid who passed away shortly after giving birth, but despite this, you are a physically and mentally healthy child. You even managed to withstand the attempts of your stepmother and your half-sister to discredit you in the family, and didn't even find a help to your neglectful father who busies himself of taking home many women from brothel.

That was in the past but you were desperate when you ask for their assistance. However, you never heard from them ever since you bore your first child, Ize.

Ize your son. Your lovely crown prince son grew up to be like your husband with his teachings. You tried to persuade him to never listen to his father but he only shook his head and told you that all his teaching that he was learning from his old man was to protect you.

Afraid that it will stress you even more in this suffocating high walls to protect you during your pregnancy and well being, Ize-the crown prince would be willing to act like a little kid for you. He would occasionally brew you a cup of tea that you enjoy or give you a handmade gift, such as an embroidered handkerchief, to show you that he was thinking of you and that said skill you taught him when he was a child. Knowing the child, this kind of acts is for him appease the worries you have;he is different behind closed doors of your confined palace where your eyes and ears can't reach; your crown prince son is a different person who will be willing to shed the blood of others just for you.

And it seems that the morals that you taught him must have been thrown out of the window thanks to your husband.

So here you are after escaping from the hundreds gazes of a watchful loyal hounds around your palace you escape, it wasn't easy since you are carrying the emperor's second child. You heard on a passing by servants that the two tyrants had a meeting with the other nobles and the neighboring kingdom, this is a rare occurrence that the two left you alone. It took you an hour to escape the royal grounds before exploring around the town till you found a port that would take you to another country. This is your only chance to escape that suffocating palace that those two tyrants confined you in. Your Husband, Yuri can't leave you alone not when he found out that you are with his child-a second child at that. Even before you were pregnant with his first child, his wary gaze and infantilization to you had multiplied tenfold.

Your husband spread the rumors about you being mentally ill. But why would he do such a thing? You reflected to yourself and it devastate you to realize it was his scheme to prevent you from seeking help from his subjects to escape. Only the royal physician and your husband were aware of this bogus illness. It felt betrayal that he has to make that action so he can confide you more.

Your husband's scheme worked. Even your own son believed the spewing lies coming from his father, and the nobles never gossip about you as if it was a taboo ever since you were married to the emperor. Speaking ill about the emperor's consort was just as good as the reaper visiting you by the second you speak those words. Only praises coming from their filthy mouths were allowed.

No one bats an eye on you, even the servants who serves under you. They will bathe you, serve you food, refreshments, but none of them will engage or start a conversation with you. When someone last made an effort to assist your escape, a kind servant at that. The lowest mining pit, which is worse than death, The emperor bestowed upon them to be sent the servant's family, including the said servant. High ranked criminals labour in a pit there for 18 hours with a maximum 4 hour break the rest of the hour are for necessities like sleeping, with much less food and income. In short, a death torture for them.

You implore your husband to kill them rather than send them there, the only thing he said to you that it wasn't your fault they were sent there. Something along the lines of—"you were acting like this because of your condition. That servant was attempting to kill you." He told you that in front of other servants. Everyone compliments his action for 'protecting' you. His cunning red eyes looks at you that none of the servants and nobles noticed but you did. It was a warning for you to behave or he will do worse.

Yuri has never harmed you, physically. but he will harm others who want to separate you from him.

The only time you regret your decision is when you met Yuri—he was about to meet his demise by the hands of his brothers if it weren't for you stumbling to see him in the middle of the night on an alleyway of the tsvetok village struggling to breathe from the deep pools of his own blood. So you drag his half dead body into your abandoned chamber—which is rarely visited by servants—that your father bestowed for you when you were born. Aiding his deep wounds, helping him heal up, befriending him, falling in love—

You purse your lips and gave a small wince feeling your belly is starting to ache, the kick from your unborn child thumps under your long dress.

My child please, Now is not the time! you gently brush your belly soothingly before leaning on the lamp post that dimly lit the night. You sigh in relief when you felt the baby inside of you cease on kicking. Although you were a little further from the palace when you looked behind you, you still needed to move quickly. Right now, you assume that Yuri or a servant that was suppose to serve you had definitely find out that you were gone this afternoon and notify the knights and some of high ranking mage to find you immediately, but the sun had already been sunk by the evening. They must have been having a hard time finding you. A little more 18 minute walk and you'll be able to ride on the ship that will help you travel to another empire, or any nation.

"ort---s--ing!" you turn to your left to look one of the vendors of the nights were gossiping. A woman with her husband was panting, assuming he was running to deliver a news to his family. His cloth headband on his raggedy hair is soaking. He took a deep breath before repeating what he said earlier. A dread of fear rise from your throat as he uttered his next words,

"The Emperor's Consort is missing! The Emperor's knights are blocking all way out!"

You heart felt like dropping when you saw a nearby knight were looking one by one at the women nearby, specifically women who are similarly pregnant like you. Speaking of the devil, they are already here!

Knights in horses, mages running around the busy street. Some of them stopping women who has similar hair color as you to assess if they found the right person.

"Oh my! I'm hoping the consort is doing okay! She must have acted such way due to her failing mental state. The emperor must have been worried sick, I can't imagine the devastion look of the emperor especially their son!" said the woman to her husband.

You hid your hair with your cape and quickly blend in with the busy road of the night town. Muttering, "excuse me!", "Apologize!" As you force your way around the crowd. One arm around your belly to protect child, while your hand went to sling your bag with clothes and some gold coins. as you bump so many people on the crowd. You look edges of the town, at the gate, to see all the possible exits were starting to get block by the imperials knights and mages. You bit your lips frustration as you felt the hope of getting your freedom back is slipping away from your grasp.

Your plan of getting to the port has been discarded after seeing a two mage and three knights were on their way there. Even if you did go in town's gate the gatekeepers will inspect people who are exiting and entering.

But...

You look at the old man who was riding a donkey with his carriage towards to exit of the gate, fruits were laying under the cloth. An Idea quickly pop your head but you are desperate to leave this suffocating country so you have no choice but to execute it.

Your silent foot falls went behind on a slow moving carriage before climbing up silently and quickly, in your haste and desperation movement, you didn't feel as though you had torn your cape at the wooden edge of the carriage before taking the fabric that was covering the fruits that keeps them from dust and dirt. You carried a handful of fruits before slowly sitting down beside it then covering yourself with the said fabric and the remaining fruit fast enough before the knights from the gate of this region would notice you. You wince when one of the fruit hit your belly but not enough to endanger the baby.

"Have you seen this lady?" A man in his mid 60s look at the paper, he squint his eyes as he held his old lightly crack glasses to take a better look. Your (e/c) eyes look at the gapping hole of the carriage and gulp fearfully when you saw your portrait on the paper holding by the imperial knight.

"O-oh...sa-aw her!" you held your breath when the old man spoke. The two knights look at each other before listening to the next word of what the old man would say.

He lick his dry lips before continuing, his voice's struggling due to his old age, "If I-Im..not mistake-en the lady in the p-picture look like the lady I saw by the lampost o..on the rozahk street!"

You exhaled in relief since you mistakenly believed that the elderly man had just seen you, but he actually noticed you five minutes' walk from the gate to roza street. However, this would also let them know that you are actually close by.

The imperial knights gave the elderly merchant a nod as they hastily walked around the city, alerting a nearby mage to use a spell to track you. They quickly tell their subordinates for a new command.

You felt the carriage starts to move. Hugging yourself for reassurance especially at your upcoming baby that everything will be okay.

You weren't escaping just for yourself but for your second child that will be born. You don't want your kid to become like their older brother and learn from their father. Ruthless, and doesn't have a compassion to another human. You want your kid to have a brighter future, away from the blood shed. You hope that if you got caught or killed by your husband in the future. You will tell your second child to run away and never look back, when you are gone.

You ignored how uncomfortable it was to sleep in the fruits. You close your eyes and see the farm neighborhood that the carriage passed as well as the slowly dissipating kingdom that was beginning to appear as a dot on the horizon.

The abrupt shake of your ride woken you up. You hear noises outside the carriage and glance through the hole to see that light was creeping through, signaling that it was dawn but sun has yet to come in the horizon. What is happening?. You peek above the cloth seeing that you don't have enough visual on what's happening. A dusty road lay in front of you, and woods surrounded you. You turn around to look behind you and realize that the palace is no longer in sight. A sense of relief that you were indeed far from that prison.

A bunch of voices caught your ears, you turned to look to your right.

Your whole body went pale.

Your son-the crown prince was chatting with each of the roadside merchants who had just exited from their vehicle not far from where you were. The imperial warriors and mages that were conversing with the other sellers the same task as your son was doing just behind him.

You curse yourself, how did they come here to fast?

You need to leave before they notice that you are inside this carriage. Just as you swiftly escape your imprisonment. You carefully stood up, removing the fabric that was covering you and the fruits, ignoring the woozy and aches from your muscle pain for not moving too much from the entire night.

A creak was heard in your vehicle when you tried to climb down. Snapping your eyes back at them, to witness if they heard the mistake you made. To your relief, The prince and the other guards were still busy interrogating.

They didn't hear me..

You reach down and starts to stalk away from them, your hands were trembling. Stepping back to reach the wood just a 5 meters behind you. It didn't matter if you get lost in the woods, as long as they don't catch you.

No, you would rather live in a woods, in a forest where no one can reach you.

As you step forward carefully in to the woods, you didn't notice from your cautious and anxious state that your boots crack a twig, just like the cliché you previously read. The nearest knight snaps his head at the sound. He was perplexed before realizing that the woman from the paper in his hand resembles you.

"Her majes-"

You dash toward the woods. The imperial knights sought to catch up to you, as you heard him behind. You grab a nearby rock and shot it directly to his skull, and it hits him.

You ignored the yelp as he yells your honorific causing the nearby knights hear him and went for his aid, before they realize what he was yelling and starts to chase after you.

You felt the dress that was getting stuck on some of bushes and dried branches, resulting to have your dress to be ripped.

Heartbeat were thumping agressively, adrenaline were rushing around your body. One of your hands went up to your belly protecting it from getting injured despite your legs were now full of scratches and bruises from the twigs, and sharp edges of these woods. You feel your legs ache.

"Mother!" You faintly hear a galloping horses along with your son's voice behind you.

Your mistake was to look behind you while running away. You saw how your son and his guards were starting to gain just to bring you back to that hellhole. Your son Ize was reaching up his hand to take you back, his red orbs were full of concern and anxiousness.

"Mother! It's me,Ize! Please, slow down you will hurt yourself!"he yelled."Mother! Think about my sibling! Your child! Listen to me! Don't let this illness take over you!"

Poor child, he thought all of this nonsense that you are doing was because of your bogus illness.

You were about to stop when you saw a nearby cliff but a trunk made you tripped.

You screamed feeling a misstep when you realized you are falling, instinctively cradling your pregnant belly, protecting it as you roll down from the ground. A piercing scream was heard—from your son. Your head colliding to the three and it felt like your head would split open.

Your eyes were blurry from the impact. Touching your belly if there was injury. Atleast trying to feel your lower part if there was bleeding through your thighs other than your legs.

You look up at the steep cliff to see your son was sliding down, crying out your title as his mother. You saw his red orbs were full of tears as it glides down to his cheeks. The last thing you saw before your vision was consumed by the darkness was his hands reaching up to your head.

You were awoken by the sound of the chirping birds coming from the balcony.

You coughed, feeling the dryness from your throat. You eyes were blurry for a few minutes before clearing to see that you were back to the same imprisonment.

But....

It wasn't the same room you shared with your husband. Are you...even in the palace?

You took your time to assess your surroundings only to realize that the room has similarities of the royalties room that are exiled but it looked renovated, one of your husband's brothers used to live here before taking his own life. You felt grim about the thought of it.

After his brother's passing you heard from one of the maids that he turned it into a vacation palace for royalties.

It was different from the last time you saw it. It was much more cleaner and better. It looked good after it was renovated.

Wait, the baby.

THE BABY!

You eyes quickly gaze down to your belly. Hands quickly feeling around them, you exhale in relief when you felt a small kick from your stomach. You felt your tears at the edge of your eyes. It was a miracle that the heavens hadn't take your unborn child away.

I'm sorry baby...

They would have died from the stupidity you'd done!

You laid down to your right side of the bed and cradle in your stomach muttering a soft apologies and starts fluttering your eyes to go back to sleep.

But somethings not right. You felt like a pair of eyes watching you, looking at you.

Observing you.

You opened your eyes and look up only to see your pair of red eyes staring down at you.

Your husband, the emperor sitting on a wingback couch, his face resting at his hand while the elbow is resting at the arm of the couch beside him is a kettle with a cup that rest on top of the bedside table.

You feel your body tense up, you tried to get up and turn to look at your husband.

"Y-your majesty." You called but it sounded like a whisper. You don't know what he will do to you. Sure, he never hurt you physically but this is the first time you'd gotten far away from the place he imprison you in.

You gulped, will he hurt you this time?

"I-I'm... I.." you cannot come up a word,an excuse, what if he gets sick of you? What would happen to your child?

You felt your breath shorten. Tears are starting to swell up in your cheeks.

A rough hand brush on your cheeks before cupping it. You found your partner is already beside you on the bed.

He didn't speak he just let you weep as he brush away your tears. You stammer your words wanting to apologize. The emperor handed you a cup of water and you took it quenching the thirst from your larynx.

Once you drank it all, you hiccup trying to stop your tears from coming out. You felt his hands caressing your belly. "H-husband.."you gulped.

"hush,милашка."he commanded and you held your tongue and closed your eyes when he leans on your cheeks before engulfing you with his arms around you. You felt suffocating around him like a snake coiling around your body.

You feel tensed as he starts peppering kisses on your shoulders and neck before resting his lips to your earlobes, you shudder when he kissed it.

His right hand from your waist slid up under your loose sleeve before sliding it down, your emperor leaned down giving your shoulder a hickey. You whimpered trying to push him away but he hadn't budge an inch. Once he was satisfied he let your skin go with a pop before looking at the red mark he left.

The same hand went to brush your hair, tuck it behind your ear before leaning his forehead against yours. His red eyes held adoration, affection, but most of all obsession.

"милашка." He muttered closing his eyes sighing, he brush his lips against yours before deepening it.

He kept calling you, held you in his arms gently. The same arms that has full of blood that slay so many heads to get to the top of this food chain.

He laid you down before kissing every finger tips of yours and then clasping it with his rough hands as he called for you.

"милашка...."

".... my милашка..."

He pressed one kiss on your collarbone. "None of this is your fault..." He told you.

"... This illness will be the death of you."

Your heart broke for him. He really delude himself that everything you did to get away from him was because of your 'illness'.

"... Everything will be fine, darling. I will take care of you." He dampened his lips one last time onto your lips before leaving you in your new confinement.

[laukern]

I like two types of men 1. Sukuna and 2. Pathetic men

Yandere!Stalker who you have been aware of since the beginning. It is difficult not to. He is really clumsy. He made it a habit to come to your room every night, but he always makes a ruckus while trying to get to your bed. One time, he even tripped and face-planted. Poor baby.

Yandere!Stalker who uses his nightly visits to bask in your soothing presence, even if you are just sleeping. He will take anything he can get. He doubts you will let a nobody like him approach you during the day anyways. When he is feeling bold, he sometimes traces your facial features. You are just the prettiest to him. That is why he also has a whole folder with pictures of you taken when you were unaware.

Yandere!Stalker who, one day, has enough courage to go under the blanket with you. He waits a bit to be sure you are still sleeping before scooting closer to you. His chest is against your back; you can feel his heart beating like crazy. He then shyly wraps his arm around your waist and nuzzles into your neck. A light pink hue dusts his cheeks. Being this close to you…He is so happy he could die right now.

Yandere!Stalker who you suddenly pin to your bed. That is it. You can’t take his cuteness anymore. It is your turn to have fun now. You watch him try to get out what looks like to be an explanation between his stutters. He keeps squirming, his hands can’t stop fidgeting and his wide, puppy-like eyes look at you with a mix of horror, from being caught, and excitement and adoration, from being underneath you.

Yandere!Stalker who you tell to wait on your bed as you make your way to the closet. A few seconds later, you toss him a…maid costume. And then a… bunny costume. And then…a skirt with cute bows. And then…You seem to spawn out of nowhere the most skimpy and feminine outfits known to mankind for him to wear (you bought them just for this eventuality).

Yandere!Stalker who has tears in his eyes as you tell him to pose. His right hand is doing a shaky peace sign while his left hand is holding the tiny skirt down. His face is beet red and he feels hot everywhere. He loves this. He is so vulnerable right now, yet he only wants to show you more. Please, humiliate him more. Pin him down again. Toss him around. Step on him. Use him as you wish. Make him yours. He will be your toy, your boyfriend, your lover. Yours to break and yours to put back together again.

“Say cheese~” *click*

[laukern]

Love this sm

I Don’t Want This Anymore • SMAU

☣︎ Includes: Gojo, Geto, Toji, Choso, and Sukuna

☣︎ CW: crack, suggestive, nsfw, brief mention of sewerslide

☣︎ A/N: idk why, but in my head, Gojo is the biggest crashout ☠️

[laukern]

I was thinking of an enemies and lovers with a monster but this monster is not really a monster but is a monster.

It's more like a spirit thing which takes forms depending on the situations for example

It needs to kill a businessman who's also a whore so it will turn into a woman in order to kill him and other times it can turn into an animal, insect, etc etc

BUT it is actually a pawn of the underworld, an essence of a fallen angel who still seeks god and thus fulfills the task of ridding this world from evil and since the angel is trapped in the underworld, their ways of establishing a world with no evil is a bit.. vulgar? (Murder, genocide etc)

Now it's desperate for god, I think that's clear enough.

It's next target was a friend of yours and for some reason you became fully aware of his inhumane presence and saw through his disguise, were you perhaps just like him?

Shaking the thought , he tried to kill you first so his cover is not blown but killing an innocent being is basically crime to god therefore he refrained to traumatizing you instead. But somehow he finds himself lurking around you, observing you, obsessing over you.

He wants to make your life a living hell, make you go through every miniscule of pain that he went through himself, he hates you, hates you.. hates you.

Yes! He hates you and that is the reason why he wants you, wants you like a starved animal, needs you like he needs oxygen, and God.. Does he want you under him.

(Pronous are he/it cause it's basically genderless but takes form of a man most of the time)

[laukern]

ITOSHI FUCKING SAE 😭😭😭

i just wanted to pop in and say I LOVE UR WRITING !! it’s so cute and ty for the sae content too ^^

if you don’t mind, could i request smth w the prompt “please don’t forget me” for sae and chigiri? + whoever else if you’d like to add more :)

thank you!

notes: idk this prompt just screamed angst, sorry if thats not what you wanted.

warnings: angst

CHIGIRI!

Not even Chigiri’s comforting words could loosen your grip on his clothes. Your face was buried in his chest to hid your puffy eyes and tear stained face.

“I’m actually so sad right now...we won’t see each other for a while...” You answer with a frown.

Although you were crying, Chigiri seemed happy to see your tears. Ever since the two of you began dating, Chigiri began doubting himself.

To him, you were the angel of his world, the most prettiest girl to ever exist and the most talented and interesting person he’s ever met. Sometimes he wonders how he scored such a 10.

But now that he was apart of the Blue Lock program, all that could change. Chigiri doesn’t know how long he’ll be with the Blue Lock program—not only that, he will be without a phone once he’s there.

Long-distance-contactless relationships don’t work.

And Chigiri is worried that sooner or later you’ll look for greener grass and forget about him.

But to see you so distraught at the fact you weren’t going to see him gave him hope.

Hope that you’ll still be his when he comes back home.

SAE!

You loved your boyfriend.

But your boyfriend loved football more than you.

‘How did our relationship ever turn out like this?’ You wonder, as you spent your night alone, on his bed, when he invited you.

Sometimes you feel as if he doesn’t want you anymore. He’s always busy or at practice—and you barely see him for weeks at a time. But you just can’t quite let go. There’s still a piece of you that’s silently hoping—wishing for things to change.

So when he tells you he’s going to Spain after a month of no contact, you go to see him off.

Why?

He doesn’t even give you the time of day so why should you?

But that little string holding this relationship together was still tight, and you intended on holding on until it snapped.

***

“Lets keep in touch okay? I don’t want any of those Spanish girls to snatch you away!” You joke, but actually you were quite nervous.

There were many pretty westerners out there, and as you were sure his love for you was running dry—you knew that there was always a possibility of him forgetting you while at Spain.

“…Yeah, sure.” He responded flatly, checking his passports one last time.

“How long are you going to stay?” You ask, hopeful for a sudden return.

“A while.” He finally answers, with no intention of ever stepping foot on Japanese soils again.

[laukern]

Let him be selfish 🗣🗣🗣

Where are you? I miss you, I see everything and it reminds me of you, please I stop this torture. Just go away. It annoys me and feels as if the weight of everything hits me, when I enter the home we used to be in. The home we promised to love eachother forever in, the days where we would lie in nothing but each other's presence and smile. Never would I think this home could be so empty, so suffocating. It's almost like a memory that is engraved in my head, something I never should’ve taken for granted, something I should’ve grabbed onto and swallowed my pride. But now it burns from me from bottom to top, as the burn never stops until I pass out with fatigue or the alcohol. It hurts so much but while in these vulnerable moments I used to have you caress my tear soaked cheeks and tell me I was alright, that I had you, my saving grace. Yet I still lost that saving grace, the only thing keeping me sane and grounded, so now I wander with nothing but a heavy heart and a husk of what I used. Although sometimes, just sometimes I think I can hear her and turn around in hopes to see her, but it was never real. But now, I see her while I celebrate a game I just won and I feel as if I’ve been revived from ashes. You look beautiful and I can’t help but feel selfish, the alcohol in my stream this bubbling feeling. As I walk towards them, I hug them tightly with tears in my eyes in realization as this is real, they are real.. I pray while closing my eyes, please just let me be selfish for a bit more, let me have this moment of peace last longer. Until a soft voice interrupts my thoughts and I can’t help but tighten my hold on them, “Sae?” I’ve missed this feeling, I’ve missed hearing my name from their soft voice, so I let it out. Everything, everything I wished to say before they left as I let my feelings pour out of my chest.

[laukern]

Binging these fics rn

❝ red roses ❞ [itoshi sae x reader]

his grip onto the flowers is so tight, his palms are now sweaty. he checks them once. twice. before he notices a petal from the fancy red rose bouquet doesn’t sit right. it’s almost dead and it falls dramatically on the ground as sae gulps watching it.

he sighs feeling his nerves play with his tummy. he feels like he did something wrong but nothing is out of place. his tie sits perfectly, there’s not a single wrinkle on his shirt or dress pants.

his hand hovers above the door and he knocks twice before you open and offer one of your closed eyed smiles to him. yet his uneasiness doesn’t falter, walking into your home he still held dearly onto that hope, that it would just go away.

he watches as you accept his gift, putting the elegant flowers into a fancy vase. he sits onto the couch as you scold from the kitchen that he is always the one that makes such a beautiful gifts.

but your words are faint as he replays the moment into his head—realization has finally hit him.

“I don’t love you anymore.” he told you on one stormy night days later, droplets of water falling onto your face. sae grazed with his fingers the jewelry on his wrist, one that was handmade by you and he closes his eyes shut just thinking about how much more you offered him, than he did to you.

it was making his mouth dry and mind race, telling the one he once loved endlessly that it would be better to part ways. to leave their smiles, giggles and promises all of it in the past so he could welcome something new—something he was afraid of. he didn’t even want to look at you in the eyes again after he worded his way of trying to break things off with you. he lowered his head and took a step back muttering a farewell while an uncomfortable sharp pain made itself welcome in your heart. you couldn’t watch his back as he left, even if you wished to, you couldn’t, the tears settling in your eyes made it harder to do so.

oh but why now? in the poring rain, while you could practically feel yourself get stuck to the ground. you never thought going inside your comforting house would be so painful. to be met with a silent place where your feelings screamed at you.

and the hardest part was going back into your bedroom where framed memories were hanging on the walls. you noticed your reflection in the glass of picture frame as a bittersweet smile played with the corner of your lips as you saw an once treasured moment of yours, that now you had to force yourself to hate and forget.

and then your eyes trailed down to the vase on your nightstand. where there lied a few drying petals to collect dust. for a moment you looked at them and then at the dying roses as their color faded. you wished these flowers would’ve lasted and that their life wouldn’t have been so short, they were the last gift that sae has ever given you...

but...weren’t flowers given out of love supposed to last longer?

© 2023 STRAWBERRYPOCKYBOX do not copy, edit or repost in any other platform

[laukern]

Shoo nagi (ilysm)

CHANGE

“You’ve changed” “We’re supposed to.”

Nagi x reader

synopsis– Nagi leaves for blue lock without saying goodbye, leaving you alone. When he returns, ready to see you, he realizes things have changed.

m.list

Keep reading

[laukern]

Wtf, I love this like this is the one fic I really really liked after the toji one

sea, swallow me

pair. itoshi sae x gn!reader

content: hurt/comfort, exes to friends (?)

synopsis. you and sae have a conversation by the ocean

wc: 2.6k

"do you believe in the saying 'right person, wrong time'?"

sae blinks, looking toward the water when you ask the question. it's getting cold outside - his fingers are red and numb and his cheeks hurt a little from the wind. the sun set what feels like eons ago, but when you're sitting next to him in the flesh he can't find it in himself to move.

he turns slowly to look at you. you, with your head resting on the knees pulled into your chest. you, with your hair blowing softly in the ocean breeze. you, with that stupidly hazy look in your eyes. distant. it makes his heart sink to the pit of his stomach. he might be ill.

"i don't know. maybe."

your gaze shifts to him suddenly and he nearly jolts out of his skin at the eye contact. you'd been refusing to look at him for the last while, not that he can blame you.

"maybe?" you repeat, looking away again and focusing on the little hole you're digging into the sand with your feet.

he doesn't respond to that, unable to acknowledge your words without the fear that the lump growing in his throat would turn into a sob. the silence stretches long and thin between you as you both sit there in the sand, listening to the waves crashing against the shore.

your relationship was always like that, too. pushing and pulling, water meeting the shoreline and then retreating again. over and over and over.

you notice his quietness, uncharacteristically heavy even for a man so stoic and blunt like him. "sorry. forget i asked."

sae nods, but the question still burns in his mind. he dares to look at you again, this time taking in everything that had changed about you. it'd been nearly a decade, after all. you had grown, matured, maybe gotten just a hair taller. you're still beautiful in a way that steals the air from his lungs and refuses to return it. he has to tear his eyes away from you again when he feels the desire to reach out and touch you, just to see if you're really there beside him. instead, he just sits still with his fingers twitching where they rest in his lap.

"how was your flight home?" you ask him, but you're not even sure if he would call japan home anymore with how long he's been gone.

"it was fine."

"that's good."

another awkward silence.

"did you have a good time in spain?" there's a bitter twinge in your voice. he's not surprised.

he nods again, even though he knows you're not looking. you continue anyways, because you know him so well. regardless of the years you have his every response mapped out.

"how was football? i saw some of your games on tv. it looked like fun. you were really amazing."

he swallows down the thickness in his throat at your words, still supportive even though he was chasing his dream instead of being with you. he still remembers the day he left, the day he stepped onto that plane and couldn't bear to look you in your eyes as he did so. he didn't even watch the airport disappear into the distance from the window. he couldn't. not knowing you were down there.

when he landed in europe he thought he only had two choices: the first was to break your heart gently, softly, delicately. break your heart in a way that would give you hope for his return home. break your heart in a way that would keep you loving him, clinging to the threads of your relationship despite the distance. his other option, of course, was to break your heart cruelly.

he didn't decide which he needed to do until he read his contract for royale and realized he would be in spain for much, much longer than anticipated.

and so he was merciless when he broke your heart. he didn't even spare you a goodbye, just blocking your number and severing all ties with you after giving you a prompt, underwhelming text explaining how he had fallen out of love with you. how you meant nothing to him. he thought he knew you. he thought this was the best for the both of you. he was just a stupid fucking teenager.

you and sae had grown up together. for as long as he could remember you were side by side. and so that night he closed his eyes, pictured the face you must be making as you read his text, and turned his phone off. being a childhood friend had its perks, but right now it was a heavy burden on his heart.

what followed was complete and utter radio silence. eventually you stopped counting the days, the months, the years, and gave up on contacting him ever again. it hurt. more than he would ever know, it hurt. it's why your first instinct when he showed up unannounced at your front door was for you to slam it in his face.

he's back in japan now and nostalgia claws at his throat until he can't breathe, just by simply being in your presence.

"yeah, it went well." and he doesn't elaborate any more than that. he doesn't know how much longer you'll tolerate sitting next to him, after all. he's not going to waste time talking about what he did in spain when you're so clearly irritated about it.

sae watches you carefully. your stare lingers on him for a moment too long before you're turning to face the sea again. "why'd you have to leave me behind?" you ask him with your voice low and eyes misty. a breeze blows the hair into your face and he can no longer see the expression you're making. that's better, he thinks. better for the heart pulsing weakly in his chest.

"i had to," he tells you matter-of-factly, like he always used to.

"i know. fuck, i get it. you went to go follow your dreams or whatever. i just wish i was a part of them." you sound frustrated beyond reason.

"maybe you could have been."

you laugh at this, dry and humourless and bitter. "yeah, right."

you hear him shuffle around a bit before he stands, towering over you. his hand extends out, a silent offer for you to take it. you, horrifically, do.

with the chilly wind of dusk growing wilder, the waves roll loudly onto the sand. you can hear as they crash rhythmically against the shore, even over the screaming of your heart in your ears. being beside him again is surreal, the warmth of his hand inviting you to crawl back into his arms.

"i missed you," you blurt out before you can even stop the words from tumbling. it's mortifying, the expression you make. if he weren't grieving what he lost right now, sae might have laughed. he makes a funny face at you instead, twisted up with guilt and an indescribable amount of anguish.

"i missed you, too. every day. every moment i was thinking about you," he finally lets out the words he'd been refusing to acknowledge for the better part of his adulthood. he says them so quietly, the statement carried away by the breeze.

you look unconvinced as you step away from him. one step back, then two, then you're standing out of reach from him. his heart aches dully in his ribcage.

you may (unfortunately still) love him, but you're not sure you can forgive him. not for leaving like he did. not for never calling. not for breaking your heart. not for showing up at your door without warning and dragging you out of the house on the first day he's back in japan.

his mouth opens and closes as you watch him wearily, unsure of what to say. unsure of how to make things right. unsure how he could ever forgive himself. emotion swims in his expression, though he does a better job at hiding it than a normal person would. nothing about itoshi sae is quite normal.

he stands there for a moment, allowing the rejection to sink in. he's torn between accepting your rejection or screaming into the night sky that he still loves you, that he wants to hold you and beg and grovel on his knees for your forgiveness even though he knows he doesn't deserve it. it's overwhelming and eventually he cracks, a choked sob leaving him.

he flushes partly in embarrassment and partly in shame while he allows himself to fall apart in front of you. he's always so level headed, cool and calm and collected and you're not sure you can vividly remember a time he cried other than when he fell off his bike when you were both nine and he scraped his chin on the pavement.

you hate seeing him cry. watching sae cry is like taking a dagger to the heart. you can feel the remorse in every sob that leaves his mouth, because he never does this - not for himself and certainly not for other people. you would feel flattered if it were any other circumstance.

so you sigh, swiftly stepping back into his arms and gathering his face into your hands. you guide him to your shoulder where you let him cry, just like you used to when you were kids.

he leans into you, arms staying by his side in fear that you might scurry away again if he tries to hold you. he lets out deep, shaking breaths as he tries to compose himself. he breathes in the smell of you, of your shampoo, of the spray you're wearing. it's intoxicating.

"i'm sorry."

"i know," you tell him. it doesn't go unnoticed that you leave out any signs of forgiveness.

"i regret it every day. i still do, even after all this time."

"do you?" you hum. your fingers run gently through his hair, brushing out the tangles that you used to scold him for not combing when you were younger.

your touch is driving him crazy. he wants to kiss you and hold you close and never let you go again. he loves you so much, it almost feels as if it'll consume and drown him like tides in the ocean if he doesn't tell you now. he doesn't, for his sake and yours.

"i never stopped thinking about you. i wanted to run back to you so many times - run home - but i couldn't. i was too much of a coward. so much time has passed now and i-..."

he's rambling and he knows it. you were the only person in the world that he could talk to about things like this. his best friend. not that the sentiment really held up after a decade apart. to your credit, you never did love another person the way you love sae. how can you just forget your first love?

he's silent for some time so you ask him quietly, "was it lonely?"

"yes," his answer is instantaneous. his voice shakes with grief, the realization of everything he lost crashing down on him like waves in the sea. he wants to grab you and scream in your face that some part of his soul still yearns for you. instead he just cries. "maybe i deserved it, though. for treating you the way i did."

you huff with what sounds like laughter, and for the first time in almost a decade his poor heart races in his chest. "rin always did badger me about that. asking why i was dating you when you were a jerk," you muse. there's not an ounce of malice behind your tone, no hidden sting. you're just reminiscing, he realizes. "that's okay. he didn't know his scary big brother was such a softie."

he grumbles a little in weak protest, face buried into your neck where his nose pokes into the skin. your body is so warm, the same way he remembers dreaming about it in spain.

"i'm sorry," he says again.

another sigh escapes you as you lightly pry him off your shoulder. you're frowning as you fret over him, taking his cheeks into your hands and twisting him around so you can examine him closely. your eyes drag all over his face, drinking in how much he's grown, how tired he looks and the bags under his eyes. he can't find it in himself to feel embarrassed anymore.

"come on, i'm here. don't cry," you coo at him, and he melts. you've never been good with sae when he cries, fumbling over what to do in these rare situations. your thumb grazes his cheek, wiping away the wetness that stains it. then it wipes at his lashes, drying the tears gathering in his eyes just from being touched by you again.

"how could i not? i messed up so bad."

sae feels like every moment in his life leading up until now has been nothing more than a series of failures. he crumbled in spain, changed his dream from being a striker to a midfielder, lost contact with rin, and most of all he hurt you. again and again, countless times.

most people would take one look at sae and think he has his whole life together. but you know him, sanity stitched loosely together every time he tries to pick himself back up again. he always thought that keeping his head high and loving forward despite his regrets would never catch up to him.

he was wrong. fuck, he was dead wrong. because now you're standing in front of him and he can't help but look back at all his mistakes and have his soul crushed. he was so selfish - taking from you whatever he could and you would always give everything to him, every part of you; soul and heart and flesh. he's surprised you aren't stripped bare to the bone with how much he's allowed himself to take without really having anything to return.

he can do better. he knows he can. he just had to lose you first to see it.

"i don't know how to fix this," he admits quietly.

"it doesn't have to be all at once. you can make it up to me little by little, y'know?"

you were always too nice to him. too good to such a selfish spoiled brat. you deserve better. he'll make sure to be everything you deserve this time around. to be loved and cherished and worshiped. hell, he'll kiss the ground you walk on just to prove it.

"okay..." he nods with his face still in your hands. "okay."

you're still his best friend after all these years apart. no matter the distance. no matter the time. how he couldn't see that when he was seventeen makes him want to go back and punch himself square in the jaw.

"so when is the right time?" he asks, "if i'm the right person."

you smile at him, for the first time since he's seen you, and he's falling apart all over again. there's a little amusement glimmering in your eyes. "how about we just catch up for now?"

"yeah, that..." sae swallows thickly. "that sounds great."

you're dragging him into an embrace faster than he can handle. he feels like he might turn to dust right now, or wake up back in spain like this was all some distant dream.

he holds you like the sea hugs the shore. like the horizon meets the sky. like he can finally breathe again.

"so tell me," your voice is sweet and kind in his ear, "is your spanish any good?"

he laughs.

© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.

[laukern]

my obsession with sae is not healthy

╰ ⋆ ❝ 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐒 ❞ ଓ.° ╮

─꒱ you and itoshi sae break up on your one year anniversary.

─꒱ FEAT. ⠀⠀⠀⠀ itoshi sae

⠀⠀⠀⠀he hated the thought more than he wanted it to. one of the things itoshi sae hated the most was having you on his mind in the middle of his game.

the swing of his foot pounding the football towards the goal in tremendous speed was how fast his mind continues to wander as the clock ticks rapidly. the cheers of the crowd is easily falling onto his deaf ears, breathe of air escaping his lips as he turns to run back to restart. though his attic hues catch on towards a figure that stood by the bleachers, close to the exit of the football stadium.

the look of defeat and sorrow on your face pains sae; you felt betrayed. he said ‘i love you’ to you once and that itself was enough for you, you wanted to believe that it was enough to hear words of assurance every time he would have to leave you. you wanted to believe that even if sae was distant and out of touch— you continued to believe that it was just his way of showing how he feels because maybe that was his love language?

the arguments the both of you shared, the warmth that you two emitted towards the other at every single embrace, every kiss and every ‘i love you’ kept you together. even if the world were to tear you apart you knew that sae would be there for you, looking for you even if you got lost.

but what you didn’t know was that all you did was continue to lie to yourself— even till now.

the date that marks your one year anniversary was today, and unfortunate for you sae had a game to play. though the fight you and him prior about this game just made it hard to watch, in fact, you didn’t even want to come to this game because you had to stop lying to yourself at some point, right?

words continued to be exchanged back and forth and your tears to even fell down you cheeks— this was the first time you ever cried in front of him during an argument. it was bad.

sae had forgotten that today was your couple’s anniversary, and to say the least it was the last.

as you lock eyes with him on the field, you couldn’t help but let the sea escape from your eyes. your heart aches for sae— despite knowing that you still came to see him one last time. the football player watches as your lips move, as if the world slowed down around him and your words were as clear as the summer sky like the one the two of you had met your figure had disappeared towards the exit.

his teal orbs couldn’t believe such a fleeting sight; it was like a dream that you had ran away from him. as much as you wanted to look behind you to see if sae even cared knowing the answer already, but love is painful, isn’t it?

itoshi sae may have won his game, but he lost you.

the love the two of you shared was that of a flower; the lycoris radiata, blooming the beauty of it’s petals only for a moment.

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