#sunbun speaks
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it's always so funny when someone "acknowledges" your disabilities but when those disabilities actually, you know, disable/impact parts of your life then they act as if the disability couldn't POSSIBLY be the problem and you're just bringing it up as an excuse
and by funny i mean it makes me want to powerdrill my own teeth
#sunbun speaks#like yes i am currently sitting down and eating instead of washing dishes#i need rest so i can keep the pain down and i barely eat so what do you want me to do?#I'm sorry i didn't pick up on whatever hidden message your words had in them and now it's awkward - yes it's the autism#like... if the symptom or behavior is obviously connected to a source but you don't take it into account then what do you want?#there's a difference between someone harming you and someone just not understanding what you meant#because their brain shits the bed in those situations no matter how much i work on it#like i take other's situations into account when i consider their words/actions because I'm not a self-centered prick#like I'm not doing this on purpose and I'm trying my best but i can't keep pushing myself past burnout#for people who don't even consider my struggles valid
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tell me you have no reading comprehension without telling me
How Baghra tells Aleksander that everyone else is dust compared to the two of them and that the grisha always die because no one is as strong as the two of them then Aleksander tells Alina that he’ll strip away all that she knows till she has nothing but him and they’re all they will need is great like damn the apple does not fall far from the tree
#grishaverse#sunbun speaks#maybe go back to middle school lit class and ask them to teach you reading comprehension again#cause it clearly didn't stick the first time#how is one a mary sue when they're 1. bad at most things and 2. spend 3 books losing parts of her humanity then loses her powers#due to the rules of the world?#like clearly you read a completely different series if you think anything you're saying makes sense#god forbid the books follow rules that none of the characters can break without consequences#also plot armor is two words
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New oc dropped: Mr. Lovell Roser, Medicinal Necrobotanist!
A quick summary!!! (His full character sheet and successful experiment will be under the cut :3)
New OC dropped, a Lodger this time!! This is my new guy Lovell Roser, a Medicinal Necrobotanist at the Society :33 his work consists of: general herbal healing of wounds and sickness, treatment of infection or bodily rot, and the slowing/reversal of death by integrating plants into a dying or passed life form!! Basically, he wants to make flower-zombies. Most of his experiments result in creatures suffering from a rabid state, but he mayyyy have succeeded on bringing one man back..
Otherwise!! He's a very paranoid, partially apathetic dude. Most of his empathy is saved for his plants and the people he likes, but he can still usually throw on a friendly or caring act. Sometimes however, he does tend to go more blank, quiet, and oddly jumpy. He doesn't tend to let himself express any negative emotions like anger, always trying to keep an upper hand on his weaknesses unless something reallyyyy gets to him.
So!! To express his emotions, he relies on flower language and gifting flowers and bouquets, feeling that they speak more words than he ever could. So, he's gifting flowers constantly, for good and bad. Otherwise, he's generally enjoyable-- or at least tolerable-- to be around. He also does journaling for a bunch of different things, mainly on plants and his fears.
I think at the Exhibition he'd show more of his healing stuff, kinda just... Skirting the whole "resuscitation via plants" thing under the rug for a bit. To be honest, he doesn't even really like the other lodgers knowing he experiments with that stuff, but most of them are at least surprisingly supportive. High society, however? Definitely not supportive. Anyways, yea, he'd show his little salves and powders and tinctures, also showing the stuff to fight infection and rot, probably explaining how wow!!! These everyday flowers and herbs have so many benefits!!!
And then yea, full character sheet and his "son" Proteus (made by @sunset-sunbun ) under the cut!!!
Name: Mr Lovell Leocadius Roser
Age:28
Pronouns: he/him
Science: Roser studies something he calls "Medicinal Necrobotany", which consists of; general Herbal healing of wounds and sickness, treatment of infection or bodily rot, and the slowing/reversal of death via integrating plants into a dying or passed life form. To the general public, his work only seems to consist of healing salves and powders and tinctures, which he's commonly visited for. However, his work certainly goes much deeper than that. He aims to bring back life, much like Frankenstein, but with the use of flora, seeing if once someone becomes one with nature, they can also be brought back with it. Most of his experimenting is on deceased animals, trying to intricately fuse roots and nerves and make the flora a part of the body, which brings it the energy to come back. Any "successes" so far have ended in an almost rabid, zombie-like state, leading to him having to constrain or put down the creature. However, he has experimented on a few human bodies, and one *may* be successful..
Personality: a paranoid, plant loving dude. Definitely has empathy issues towards people, unless he's closer to them. Most of his empathy is for his plants (and ofc the people he likes). He usually seems somewhat cheerful, fine to talk amongst people and feign empathy with people he's less close to, but sometimes he seems more blank and jumpy. It's usually best to just leave him be when he's like that, unless you're closer to him. Otherwise, he tries not to outwardly express many of his negative emotions, always trying to keep an upper hand on his weaknesses, so he never really shows his anger or annoyance unless something has *really* gotten to him. Somehow, this doesn't stop him from still being an asshole. (Some of the lodgers have also probably seen him cry at least once though, a damning combination of paranoia and sleepless nights tend to set him on edge and one good spook can have him tearing up.)
When he has trouble articulating his feelings, he tends to fall back on flower and bouquet meanings, since he feels they mean much more than words. He also uses this as an outlet for his negative emotions, gifting flowers that have negative symbolism. So, all in all, he's gifting people flowers *all the time*, whether for good or bad. He also has a fear of spirits, specifically malicious ones, so he tends to keep protective plants on him at all times (lavender, ferns, sage, and his 4-leaf clover necktie pin), and when experimenting he's insistent on having his full body covered.
All in all, he's *generally* enjoyable to be around, or at least tolerable, usually more of a listener unless a topic of plants or medicine crops up, then he tends to ramble. Most of his free time is spent tending to his plants, experimenting, wandering the society, or journaling. The journaling ranges from plant and flower information and meanings (which he has logged extensively), slave, medicine and tonic "recipes", experimental logs, paranoid ramblings, and suspicions/gossip on people.
Backstory: As a kid, he lived more in the country, somewhat separated from society. This lead to his initial interest and curiosity in plants, as he spent most of his time outside among nature. His father was a kindly working man, though a bit emotionally distant, and his mother was sickly and snappy, leading Roser to prefer being out of the house. He started reading books of crazy scientists and monsters, which began to cause paranoia, though his curiosity tended to override his fears.
He became fascinated with herbal healing, reading and learning of flora's many uses, and became specifically curious about bringing things back with nature when he first came across a deceased animal, partially reclaimed by nature. He noticed how the plants prospered around the decay, and began to off handedly wonder if that Bloom of life could bring someone back, like how Frankenstein made his creature, except without electricity. He eventually went to university for anatomy and surgery, but he eventually switched to botany and horticultural classes. He made herbal medicine as a sort of side job, mainly experimenting with things, and a few years after university he found the society.
Lodger relationships: he's closest with Tanis (despite his fear of spirits), Doddle, Flowers, Rachel, Bird, and Archer. He's quite neutral on most of the others, but he's a bit intimidated by Maijabi, Cantilupe, and Ito (despite occasionally supplying her with things.) The main exceptions to that neutrality lies in Helsby and Griffin, who have caught Roser in a prank one too many times (and disrespected his lovely plants.) Roser is usually regarded quite well, especially since he's the main person to go to for any medicinal or healing reasons when potions are either unnecessary or just distrusted. Additionally, he won't admit it, but Roser has occasionally used Griffin or Helsby as a sort of test subject for new concoctions. Additionally, he's very half and half on Jekyll, of course greatful for the home he's been able to make in the society, but not very close to the man. There's just something off about him, but Roser holds no ill intent towards him. Hyde, however? He quite dislikes. Hyde has bothered him and messed with him and disrespected his plants enough that Roser gets annoyed at the mere sight of him, surprisingly snappy towards the blond.
His "successful" experiment: he somewhat succeeded in bringing back one human body, old name unknown to him, but Roser's called him Proteus, after the Protea flower, which symbolizes transformation. He's very cautious with Proteus for a good while, but it eventually gets a bit better. Proteus can't talk, and he's partially held together with poppies and carnations, as well as a general mix of other flora and fungi. He's usually quite out of it, not always responding to sound stimuli, but he's also seemingly not aggressive or prone to lashing out. Proteus is Roser's pride and joy, and he makes sure to care for him the best he can, pushing aside any fears or paranoia. He treats Proteus like a son, in his own silly way, making sure he's fed and hydrated and not rotting, testing him to see how he responds to things and how well he can still function. (Proteus's character and design was also made by @sunset-sunbun so once again big thanks to Sunny for Roser's flower zombie son!!!!)
Extra stuff: he made the little strap that holds his lavender himself and put one on each waistcoat. Not only to protect him, but also to showcase to people that he's not the most trusting. He's also allergic to bees! So all of the pollinators in his room are mechanical ones (made by Flowers (or his boyfriendddd)). He has these frequent premonitions or gut feelings that something is going to go bad. If they're not strong enough, he tends to try and ignore them, chalking them up to mere paranoia, but if it's stronger he tends to give into it, warning those who will listen or who he feels is in danger. He's felt dreadfully drawn towards Jekyll for a while now, and despite feeling quite neutral about him, Lovell has been trying to slip him warnings and protections.
If you read all of that, tysm :33 proof again that I cannot leave my characters simple or partially developed, I go ALL the way
He also!!!! Has a boyfriendddd-- a fellow Lodger named Vasily (who's @arsieu s OC :D) I love them sm. Also art by Arsie ofc
#oc: Lovell Roser#tgs#the glass scientists#tgs lodgers#lodger oc#tgs oc#Mr Roser#i loveeee flowers sm#hes just a little unhinged <3
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Holy shit hello new people?? i didn't expect that post to be the one to give me followers, welcome!! Those are for my fangame FNAF:Forever and Ever, it's a multiplayer 4 guards vs 1 spirit classic fnaf fangame!! You can mix and match animatronics against the guards which is why I'm making these renders! I apologise as I want to look at a lot of yalls blogs but I sadly cannot touch fnaf media for now till after tomorrow, I'll try to remember to check yall out!! SPEAKING OF TOMORROW, COME JOIN ME AND @sunbun-fnaf'S STREAM OF HELP WANTED 2 AT 4 PM PST, WE'RE GOING IN BLIND AND ARE ALREADY HALF WAY THROUGH THE GAME (estimating, we aren't sure!) THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU EVERYONE!!!
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Aaaand there it was, the tint of her face slowly reddening at his teasing compliment while she looked away, smiling bashfully.
* Y-You really mean that?...
The blonde said with a mumble, fiddling with her digits. That definitely had flattered her, feeling a tiny bit better about her performance abilities...until she remembered.
* Okay, don't laugh, but...when I was younger, I remember wanting to do theatre as a hobby or something...but I never ended up doing it because I was too shy. That, and mostly the fact that I have terrible, terrible stage fright. It's horrible...so I honestly don't know if I could have done that...
She sighed, looking a bit defeated. If only she could learn to beat that fear! She supposed it as possible, but at the same time she couldn't help but feel that it was just how she was and couldn't do anything about it.
* Even for small things like singing...I like singing but I'm so scared to sing around people, sometimes it's so bad I literally can't speak at all and my heart's racing. I just...don't like being perceived I guess.
Sophia joked a little, a half-hearted laugh leaving her. It was clear it was bothering her, but she'd accepted it by now. That was just how she was.
The assistant perked up when Sun spoke again though, seeing the rooms from far away as they slowly reached them.
* Oh! Thanks, Sunbun, I can always count on you. I'll be right back then!
She said with a smile, giving a small wave before slipping past the doors and going to change into her pajamas.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *. @celestialdaycare .* :☆゚. ───
It had been a little while since their new assistant had been hired to work alongside the two― and it had been going on great!
Much, much better than she expected, that was for sure. Not that she expected it to go bad, but...she just didn't know that she'd click so well with them!
But that made her very happy for the lonely girl she was― and it made it so nice to work with them! And today was a special day, because they had planned a sleepover!
She had been so excited about it the entire day that it made it seem like her shift was much, much longer than usual. But alas, once her shift was over and they had taken care of the cleaning, they could finally hang out!
With a visibly excited demeanor, she turned back towards them after putting the cleaning supplies back in their respective locker― going back behind the desk and zipping open her sleepover bag she brought just for the occasion.
* Guess what I brouuught~
Sophia sing-sang, sliding a colorful, quite large rectangular case out of the bag and shaking it a bit towards them with a mischievous smile. There was no mistaking what it was! They had talked about it after all.
The blonde had brought everything she needed for the occasion! The switch she had just taken out (without forgetting to bring all the cables) pajamas, snacks, her plushie that she always slept with, her toothbrush for later― nothing was missing!
Oh, tonight was going to be fun!
#HELP AHHAHAHA#thats so funny please 😭#instantly made me think of the spongebob meme with the fish saying WHAT?!#i wish i could draw that lol#celestialdaycare
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it's so fun when the people who took everything from you claim to be the real victims. like, y'all want to dump a years-long friendship in a dumpster fire just cause you're in a romantic relationship and that's the only thing that matters to you, go fucking ahead. but don't pretend to be the victim when you were the one who destroyed it.
you don't get to take literally everything from me and claim that you were the real victim when the only thing you didn't take was the skin off my bones.
#sunbun speaks#i keep having nightmares/memories of the 3-ish people who literally left me with nothing but the clothes on my back#and kept asking for more because it wasn't enough#or the fact that every single one of them basically turned into whoever their partner wanted them to be and would ditch their own parents#if their partner told them they didn't like them anymore#using me as a scapegoat whenever they had negative feelings and accuse me of being the source instead of a voice of reason#or just straight up getting pissed at me when i wasn't going to play their toxic game#and by the end of it all i had nothing: no clothes or any of my stuff no money nowhere to go and no friends#they destroyed my life while i was barely a blip in theirs#people who grew up with wealthy parents are fucking pricks#because yeah that's another thing they all had in common other than being codependent af: they all grew up with upper-middle class parents#they just took and took and took and tossed me aside#cause btw it's really hard to get back a lifetimes worth of stuff in only a few years with no money#i still remember everything they took from me and not just material possessions#and in the end they wanted me to apologize to them for being inadequate in filling my role as emotional punching bag#only for none of them to feel any remorse and get mad at me for implying they did anything that i didn't deserve#even looking at my life now i only have my partner and my kids#as much as i try i can't fix the fact that I'm autistic which means i will always struggle with human interaction#so it's not like it's easy to make friends#especially not friends who don't religiously devote themselves at the alter of toxic monogamy and view anyone else as 'extra' and disposable#in a matter of three years those three people took everything from me and despite it being 6 years later i am STILL recovering what i lost#how can you destroy someone's life who never did anything to you and still consider yourself the victim
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season 2 is so bad omg. it's just sooo bad. and that ending? tell me you didn't understand the books without telling me
#shadow and bone#sunbun speaks#it's so bad it's disgusting#but at least they didn't put any darklina in season 2 so we were spared
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Day 2:
canon:
Goth, Prep, Jock & Nerd from the webtoon Boyfriends.
Camille, Nyra, & Dendro from the webtoon Muted
non-canon but i wish it was canon:
Yennifer, Geralt, & Jaskier from The Witcher
Alina Starkov, Mal Orestev, Genya Safin, & David Kostyk from the Grishaverse series
Hey there polyamorous punks! Polyamory Week will be on August 15-21 this year! As with last year each day with have a prompt! Share your own story, draw, write, create, whatever!
Prompts will be released on August 1st here on PolyamorousPunk!
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second season of shadow and bone pulled a live-action avatar movie basically
#sunbun speaks#shadow and bone#shadow and bone netflix#it was SO BAD#that ending was atrocious#also Alina should've gone HAM on murdering Darkles#they did Alina and Mal and Genya and David and Zoya so dirty 🤢🤢🤢#thank god the show isn't canon cause like this was just straight up bad writing#anti darkling#i don't want his creepy fangirls commenting here#they're always so dumb and gross#'i wish alina ended up with her groomer and abuser.' 'age is only a number!' 🤢 'it's anti feminist that alina ended up happy and safe!'#also somehow Nikolai was even more intolerable in the show??#pretentious frat boy energy is so exhausting#I'm surprised he was only punched once
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when you explain that you're looking for compassion and believing in the best in each other in a relationship and that you felt it was inappropriate to bring up how someone else's issues (they are unrelated to the problem) were worse and more valid than yours and that you have no right to be upset because you're the villain for things that they misunderstood you doing or just did themselves and blamed you for. they also accuse you of being codependent with your needs. so you try to repeat yourself on your expectations and boundaries in friendships (i will accept no less than someone at least putting in the effort or having the desire to have a healthy friendship) and that there was so much she did that i never asked for nor wanted but i accepted it because i didn't want to seem ungrateful so whatever codependency she felt we had must have been one sided because i explicitly remembered that i never made her responsible for my mental well-being, i did not actually like that she treated me like a child and i had been complaining about that for years in our friendship especially near the end of it. i was an adult and didn't appreciate being treated like a child. but i went along with it because i was willing to let her get away with it if that's what she felt she needed from our friendship. so i sent her a basic infographic about healthy relationships and how they work and noted that the things i had asked for were just basic healthy relationship things and that i have never at any point in our friendship wanted her to take care of me. i wanted us to be equals. she told me that she wasn't willing to put in that amount of effort for anyone and how her boyfriend is her family and her life and her purpose and how friends just weren't really a priority at all and they certainly never got close to the level of importance as her romantic relationship. like... she literally disagreed with treating people with basic respect because friendship wasn't worth that effort. so i told her i hope she heals that wound in her heart and that she can eventually move on from whatever caused it but that i refused to settle for less than a healthy friendship just because she doesn't know how to love anyone fully or put aside her pride. that i genuinely hope she heals and has a good life but to never contact me again because i don't care to see it. that whatever is going on with her that she's been running away from isn't my problem for her to project onto me. she doesn't get to assume my intentions or thoughts or feelings about anything when she never asked me once. but fine, she has every right to think whatever she wants about me regardless of how true it is because I'm not responsible for her feelings, especially not now and i would genuinely appreciate it if she never spoke to me again.
people in the thick of amanormativity who haven't deconstructed relationships with others who are strict monogamists are so fucking exhausting.
#sunbun speaks#thing 1#i had been basically asking the same thing over and over for like 2 days because she would talk around the question#and never actually answered it so i just kept asking in different more clarifying ways#and we eventually got to her admitting that she only saw me as a child and that she always felt responsible for my feelings#and that she felt like she always had to fix me because i was helpless#and how that was MY fault because how could i FORCE her to watch me fail or starve or die#like... unless i specifically ask you for help with a problem just assume i don't want help#i wasn't forcing her to watch anything. i withdrew and hid in my room for the most part and never asked for her charity#that she would later use to insult me#i have been saying for YEARS that i do NOT want someone to save me or protect me from shit#how i just want someone to be there to go 'yeah wow that sucked. okay lets brush the dust off and try again later.'#like she literally would just do shit that i never asked for or wanted then got mad at me for 'forcing' her to do it#and i had to act grateful or she would call me difficult#by the end of the conversation i honestly just felt burnt out and pity#i should have found a way to discourage her more or just not accept what she was doing#i thought at least some of the stuff she did came from genuine care for me so it was easier to accept the rest because i figured#that it came from a place of love#but nope#i was just a project she couldn't fix that she scrapped despite me never asking her to fix me#i don't care if this makes sense#my super feminist best friend turned into a self-righteous tradwife with little compassion for others and even less for me#and built up this person in her head of who i was without ever asking me about any of it#so i'm just a ball of emotions rn#also there was the lowkey ableism despite her claiming to be neurodivergent (her only previous claim is that she#'had some autistic traits' and 'none of it ever effected me enough to be a hindrance on her life'#so it kind of felt like she only mentioned it to discredit how much autism and add makes me struggle#then there's just the fact that she 'didn't care' that i needed a cane to walk until it wasn't fun anymore and there wasn't an upside#she feels very much like a conservative wearing the skin of a leftist#like she parrots shit about anti ableism while being ableist and using her own mental illness as a shield against criticism
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all i ever wanted my whole life, my only aspiration, was to have friends/be a friend. that's all i ever wanted. just someone who chose me, chose to share their lives with me, and we would keep choosing each other.
which is why i put up with so many people who weren't my friends but pretended to be. i just so desperately wanted connection with others because for me, it was the hardest thing to achieve. my whole life I've never been able to make a real friend, just people who used me or hurt me or betrayed me.
there was a time when i thought i had finally made a friend. she was full of life and so fun and she treated me well. she made me come alive. over the years, she became entangled in my soul. i couldn't imagine a future without her in it in some way.
how was i supposed to know it was one-sided? how could i read a situation i barely understood? i didn't know real friends could just throw you away when they get a new relationship like you never mattered. i didn't know real friends could leave you on hold, leave you with a promise, and never come back. i was always taught that real friends loved you.
that means that I've never had a real friend. I'm so sick and tired of people just telling me to put myself out there and to try to make friends. you think i haven't tried? you think i haven't done everything i could think of to achieve this one pathetic goal? after 26 years? really? it's not that i haven't tried, I've been trying so hard. it's just that now, i don't see a point. after 26 years of doing and saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and eventually making my world so small that i don't know why i keep living in it most days... I'm tired. I'm tired of being the only one that gives a shit.
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so apparently scotty up there just would be totally okay with polio killing and disfiguring people as long as the "government doesn't tell me what to do". like please just say you're an anti-vaxxer 🙄 this is a matter of public safety and we've seen in the past year and a half that this individualist mentality is killing people. but i guess you don't give a shit because its just disabled people, old people and kids. if making it mandatory to do something that would save people's lives means giving up a tiny portion of bodily autonomy, by all means. cause i'm not a selfish asshole who only cares about myself. fuck the government, i don't give a shit. but if you think for a second that people should be allowed to put other people's lives on the line because they don't care about anyone but themselves, you might need to reconsider your views. this isn't about only you. you don't want to be considered an anti-vaxxer then maybe don't spout the same shit they do. you're worse than an idealist, you're delusional. stop pretending you care about anyone's life because clearly your "beliefs" trumps people's lives.
Take a moment to understand how vaccine passports as permit into public spaces will impact anyone undocumented and anyone who is unable to show ID for other reasons, like a trans person who is forced to out themselves every time they show ID.
It should be very obvious that vaccine passports are a barrier to most forms of public life for marginalized people. They’re not safety. They’re state violence against the most vulnerable among us.
Fight vaccine passports. Fight them with everything you’ve got.
( The same goes for any ‘covid-free’ access pass in places where those passes can not be anonymous or where you need an ID to get tested.)
#sunbun speaks#like wow fuck that person#and no i'm not gonna respond further than this#but an entire classroom of children in my state got covid because people in my state have that same mentality#like jeez pull your head out of your ass and think about other people for once#the polio vaccine was made mandatory and guess what?? polio was nearly eradicated#measles was only brought back because of people with that individualist mentality#the whole point is to make life better for others not wantonly kill them cause you don't think people should be forced to get a shot#god forbid some people don't want to die just because they're disabled poor old or young#that mentality is just helping the rich murder the people they don't think are useful#like gee thanks in helping the very people you claim to be against
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is it normal to be really tired all the time no matter how much you rest
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anyone know how i can watch yellowjackets without having showtime or anything?
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tagged by: @oretsev 💖
tagging: @frogsinc @ghostyluxe @modern-olori @earlsgrey @freckledsweetpea
rules: https://toon-me-picrew.carrd.co/
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