#and talking to other guys and loving other guys and connecting with other guys

[esotericbluntbaby]

your hamzah angst was sooo good 😭 i really love this specific concept of angst where one of them distances from the other 🥹🥹

maybe you could do a prompt where y/n is scared to date hamzah?? maybe even rejecting him at first or something omg...

or one where they get into an argument which makes one of them distance themselves from the other (i love this concept so much sorry LOL)

passionfruit

hamzahthefantastic x reader

description: heartbroken by the reader rejecting his advances out of fear, hamzah finds someone else; yet, he doesn't realize he looks for you in her until it was almost too late.

mentions: roommate!hamzah, angst, feelings of abandonment, she/her pronouns, happy ending, sfw!

i was listening to passionfruit by drake while writing this lol i was trying to go for a trope where they're both yearning but there's a blockage in the way of them getting to each other. "leaving, you're just doing that to get even" really inspired me

--

"this is azra, my girlfriend," hamzah admitted as you gazed at the alluring girl he brought into the apartment.

in moments, you felt like the library of alexandria has fallen once again. all the enriching history and knowledge you once knew, in addition to him knowing as well, was burnt to a crisp like a match to dry grass. you wondered if things could've been different; if you had finally grown the courage in the garden of your soul to tell him how you truly felt. yet, it was too late to dwell.

you couldn't blame him for getting a girlfriend, especially one as pretty as she is. technically, he wasn't yours to begin with; he was merely your roommate living in the room parallel to you. however, for a while, it felt like he was. the chemistry between the two of you morphed into a familiar tension of pairs; grapes are connected by their stems in the way that leaves are connected by the branches, the same way that you two were connected by the many traits you had in common.

there was always exchanged glances. the contact between your eyes and his created a candle flame that the wrinkles and creases from his smile would fan. you two acknowledged it, leading to social settings being disrupted by being stuck in a cycle of addiction: an addiction to the understanding you two had for each other with merely a look. some call it the look of love, but you and hamzah never even had the chance to speak about it.

eventually, the shared eye contact turned into physical contact. whether it was interlocking your arms or hands or legs together while cuddling on the couch, or simply sitting on the floor to him and resting your head on his thigh as he played games with martin, days went by with a different method of touch brightening both of your days.

one time, specifically, you began to cry because of the stress that consumed any amount of happiness you were able to feel. assuming that hamzah would just hang out with you, possibly giving you a long and needed hug, you decided to go to his room. opening the door to you on the verge of breaking down in front of him, he not only gave you a hug, but also pecked your forehead and cheeks with kisses while whispering reassurance and affirmations into your ear. things were different from that day; you were no longer just friends.

however, with the difference in relationship, anyone would think that you two would simply talk about what you were. you guys have done practically everything together besides see each other naked or kissed on the lips; why wouldn't you begin to watch a relationship flourish when you know there was nothing that could go wrong? you knew he felt the same way that he did. why wouldn't you take the leap and see where it takes you?

you were a pussy. that's why.

so, you began to distance as if hamzah had the black plague and you were trying to live until you were old and wrinkly. he noticed the uncomfortable amounts of quietude in the apartment and how, suddenly, you began to go out more to parties and hangouts. hamzah knows you; you were never a partying type of girl. he knew there was something up from the sheer amount of you posting on your story about a venue or houseparty you were at, despite being one of the biggest homebodies he knew. did he mention it to you? no. in fact, he amplified the distance since he thought you simply didn't like him the way he liked you. he took your distance as rejection, similar to an empty score on a test or no reply after a job interview.

you distanced yourselves from each other, causing the home to become a house with two bodies far away from each other inside of it. yet, hamzah still decided to introduce you to azra since she would be around more often, causing the awkward situation in front of you to unfold.

"it's nice to meet you," you mentioned as you shook her hand, almost as if this was a business deal instead of an introduction.

she snarked, "yeah, totally. hamzah, you didn't tell me your roommate was a girl?"

hamzah stared at her, "i did. it was one of the first things i told you when i asked if you wanted to come over, actually."

"mmm, i don't remember," she turned to look at you, "will that be a problem?"

confused, you turned your gaze from hamzah to her, "i'm not following. what are you talking about?"

"you're his roommate. you're a girl. i'm his girlfriend. is that an issue?" she cocked her eyebrow.

"no, ma'am, it won't," you reprimanded and gave hamzah a stare of annoyance, "i'm gonna go out. i'll see you later."

--

azra made herself at home in the least plausible way possible. though hamzah worked hard to keep the kitchen clean each time he decided to cook a meal for the whole house, azra would make a meal for herself and leave the dirty and stained dishes inside of the sink. hamzah would clean the single bathroom sink, since you two shared and he would feel bad if he didn't since he shaves; azra would leave her makeup on the counters in addition to watermarks on the tiling. hamzah's cats loved most people and had no issue with them being around, yet, they would hiss and run away from azra as if she was the wicked witch. the balance of the household was completely diminished ever since she began to come over more often.

so, you decided that you were going to move out. there was no longer space for you in this house anymore; not with her being hamzah's girlfriend.

knocking on hamzah's door, you prayed that his girlfriend wouldn't be in his room. there were too many times where she had accused you of attempting to take him. hamzah would defend you, which you were insanely grateful for since she was driving you up and down the walls, leaving her accusing him of wanting you, as well. the door swung open, revealing hamzah in a gray hoodie and black, nike sweatpants. his hair was held in a beanie with loose curls exiting out of the back of his head. it was always one of your favorite looks of him. he knew that.

"hey, can i come in?"

--

the clock read 12:03 am. you two sat on his bed after a brief catching up. in those mere moments, you felt like things were normal again. there was no arguing and no awkward distance from each other. in fact, even the silence of the room was comfortable. yet, you knew it couldn't go on for too long.

"so, why'd you decide to come in here?" he asked, genuinely curious.

you cleared your throat, "i just wanted to talk to you about something kinda serious."

"i'm all ears. talk to me. what's up?"

"hamzah, i think it's time for me to move out."

his eyes widened in surprise mixed with a glint of worry, "what?"

"i dunno. i just think that, maybe, you've kinda outgrown me in a way?"

"what are you talking about?"

you hesitated, silence filling the space between you.

"stop it," he softly demanded.

"stop what?"

"just say what you want to say. you're thinking about it too much. say it as it is."

you sighed, "if you're happy with azra, i think i should leave. sometimes, it hurts just to look at you guys. i know it's bad that i'm talking to you about this as you're literally with her, but i guess i haven't gotten over how close we used to be and how it could've turned into something. i think this is for the best. i'll figure out the paperwork tomorrow. i'm sorry, hamzah."

leaving his room in a rush, you began to tear up as you entered your room, went underneath your fuzzy covers, and attempted to sleep.

--

the next day flew by; you went to the front office to collect the paperwork for the resignation of your lease. attempting to fill it out was rough, since strands of doubt kept on pulling you back from fully signing each signature and information on the paper. at around 8:00 at night, you heard a knock on your door as you began to fill out the last form of resignation. your hand twisted the doorknob, slowly revealing hamzah at the opposite end; he looked like he hadn't slept in a day, as dark circled caressed the bottoms of his eyes.

"hi, um, can i come in?"

you stared at the floor, "yeah, sure."

he sat down on your bed, your mattress making a squeaking noise at the weight of his body being fully transferred onto it. you sat onto the chair of your desk, parallel to him on the bed, and swiveled it around so you would be able to see him.

you questioned out of worry, "are you okay? did you sleep at all last nigh-"

"stay."

"what?"

"stay, please. don't move out, don't go."

you sighed, "hamzah, i'm filling out the papers right now. i'm not needed here anymore."

"but you are needed here! i need you here."

"you have a girlfriend, you have to need her inst-"

"i broke up with her."

uncertainty of the conversation began to make your brain go blank, "what?"

"you can call me a fucked up person. you can call me anything, actually, but you can't say that i don't need you here. i never looked at her the way that i look at you. i think this whole time i've just been looking for everything that you are whenever i looked into her eyes. you can call me fucked up, but i just can't help it. she isn't you. it's like somehow you've tied a rope to me and i can't seem to get out of it, but i also don't want to get out of it? i realized that last night when you told me you wanted to move out."

"hamz-"

"i didn't sleep at all because i was scared."

"why?"

"i didn't want to look to the room in front of mine and have it be empty when it could've been turned into an office or something."

you furrowed your eyebrows, "hamzah, it could still be turned into an office or something. in fact, me moving out would give you more room to-"

he placed his hands on your shoulders, "that's not the point. the point is that i'd want to turn it into an office when you move into my room. the only reason i'd ever want that room to be empty is if it was because you decided that you wanted to share space with me and sleep with me in mine."

"what are you saying?"

his hand made its way to your cheek, "you said that you couldn't get over how we could've been something. we can be something. just stay.

his eyes glistened with hope and nervousness intertwined and holding hands in his irises. hesitance filled the air in between the two; the combination of the intense eye contact, as well as the physical touch of his hand cupping your cheek as if it belonged there, created a sense of uncertainty. you both were uncertain where you would end up, how you would end up, what this interaction would lead to. it was only when hamzah's lips softly landed on yours that you realized that, suddenly, everything fell into place. it was short, sweet, and supple, only lasting about a mere 2 seconds; yet, pulling away was similar to pulling two magnets apart without a handle to hold. the feeling of his lips on yours lingered even after you pulled away.

"y'know, you're a horrible person for trying to find me in another woman," you told him softly.

"call me a horrible person all you want. i'm sorry, baby," he kissed you again, "forgive me?"

"hmm.. i don't know if i can. actually, if you do me this favor, i will.

"a favor as in?"

you handed him the documents you signed, "either burn it or shred it. i don't care."

--

author's note

i have no clue if im into how this turned out, but surprise lol two in one day!

[uravitypng]

𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐫𝐲

pairing: yandere satoru gojo x chubby reader

summary: at the beginning gojo made your life hell when he first sees you because you won't give him attention. then it all changes, he just hated seeing you cry and he'll use all his resources and power to love you and spoil you

word count: 14.7k words

a/n: okay okay! i'm back! with something incredibly longer compared to every other oneshot i've written. i started this before gojo's birthday but it just kept getting longer and longer, then came the holidays and then i got ill too but it's finally finished, yay! i hope you all enjoy this and of course like always make sure you read the warnings before reading x

content warnings: gojo is a yandere!! friends to lovers, hints of stalking, gojo manipulates everyone, mentions of breeding, fingering, rough unprotective sex, cumming inside, gojo calls her 'silly girl' in his head and thinks she thinks to much (kind of like 'you don't need to think or make decisions or earn money because i can do that for you'), dirty talk, dumbification, objectification(?), submissive reader, dominant gojo, petnames: princess, sweetheart, (good girl) (if i've missed anything please let me know because it's very possible with 14.7k words - mdni / 18+

everyone flocks to satoru gojo, girls and guys alike, they want his attention, if only for a second, and want to be noticed by him. he's the beating heart to every social situation, with an ability to draw every single eye in the room on him, feeding off the spotlight and admiration. whatever he wants he gets it, he has since he was a young child so why are you being so difficult?

there's not many who he considers his equal, if he had to pick out one it would be his best friend from childhood suguru geto, two families telling their children to talk to the other in hopes to form more connections. gojo remembers to this day being five years old dressed up in a suit that was too stuffy for any five year old to wear, taken to a party with his parents. everywhere he looked there were elites and politicians, anyone and everyone with power. he remembers the nudge his mother gave him towards suguru's direction, telling her son to make friends. others at the university are lesser than him, but they're entertaining for a short duration, before he gets bored of them and tosses them away for someone else, that is.

then there's the nobodies, the lowest of the low. uninteresting in every way possible with nothing to offer him, nothing to pique his interest and in terms of satoru gojo you're a typical nobody but even the nobodies look his way when they think people won't notice. even the really shy ones or the stubborn ones who always say how much they despise how everyone adores him will momentarily glimpse in his direction when they think no one's looking.

but you... you look right past him, and it pisses him off. do you think you're better than him? even people in long term relationships eyes drift to him, most would break up with their partner for just one night with him. this 'most' mainly means all, everyone wants a chance to be with the man whose sexual escapades are spoken about frequently in such a high regard.

it's not like you don't know about his existence, you do, but you want to keep yourself to yourself. even your closest friends talk about the famous satoru gojo but he gives you the shivers for some reason. you've never spoken to him and you don't intend to, even if it's everyone's dream, it's not yours, something's just not quite right about him. you live in completely different worlds, different universes, and you prefer to dream about things more realistic, maybe dragons and flying saucers on occasion but never satoru gojo. not only is associating with him unrealistic but just the thought of him makes you shudder. he's too cocky, too self-assured, too arrogant, too loud, too... attractive, it doesn't seem right that someone would look that good. it's like he's hypnotised everyone bar you.

first it's irritation when he notices your behaviour, it's clear when you're acting the complete opposite to everyone, then it's anger when he sees you pay attention to someone that isn't him. something must be wrong with you if you're laughing at a joke that he didn't make, a joke told by another nobody, not just a nobody but someone a year younger. his actions are fuelled by his anger and his annoyance towards you. he makes sure every friend and acquaintance you have stops talking to you, it's easy really. all those so called 'friends' leave you alone after 'overhearing' hushed voices talk about how gojo's more likely to talk to someone when they're not friends with someone who's like you. it was easy to orchestrate it, all he needed was two girls who constantly fawn over him, perfect for doing his bidding.

"gojo never talks to yumehara, even though she tries so hard."

"yeah, it's because she's friends with moriyama. associating with someone like her is a no-go."

"moriyama?"

"yeah, you know that girl in class a, the one who thinks she's better than everyone and doesn't care about gojo."

you now sit by yourself and walk the corridors alone- easy. if he was more sympathetic towards you he'd almost feel bad that all of your friends would stop talking to you so readily.

next was your grades. the gojo family funds the university meaning that he had much more power than the average person, even more than people who also come from wealthy families. professors know it's in their best interest not to get on the bad side of the heir of the gojo family, not just for the university's sake but for themselves as well. one wrong move and they'll be fired, blacklisted throughout town unable to get a job. one wrong move and the university could lose all their funding. he wields more power than the headmaster.

you already get average grades, typically b's and occasionally c's but if he plays his cards right he knows he can lower those c's another extra grade down to an f and he knows just who to start with. professor iura: a man in his mid-thirties who's respected by all and he knows you like him. he's been told you try extra hard in his class, taking double the amount of notes in his lectures than you ordinarily do. he knows getting an f in his class first would be more hurtful than over all the other classes.

"professor iura don't you think the girl who wrote the paper on-" he stops mid sentence, what did you write about again?- "something so boring it hasn't even sunk in. i remember everyone else's but not hers." he only remembers his own and there was never any reason to see what a nobody like you wrote about.

the professor's eyebrows furrow before quickly schooling his expression back to impassive. satoru has used his influence before but iura's never heard about him using it as payback for whichever poor soul's caught his ire. "who is it?" iura thought you deserved an a this time, it's disappointing that he'll have to give you an f.

all these things start stacking up and you feel like the universe is against you, you don't understand your sudden drop in grades or why your friends won't talk to you. you do your best to put on a brave face but you feel alone, you have no one to turn to, you don't understand why everyone gives you the cold shoulder and why they pretend you don't exist, your facial expression dropping when someone ignores you for the umpteenth time. you don't understand how your water always seems to spill in your bag all over your things even though you swear you've put on the lid securely, screwing the lid on the bottle so tightly your hands suffer the consequence, almost raw, from how tight you've tried to make it. you can't afford to buy another textbook and you don't have enough time to rewrite your essay.

you don't understand how things go missing every time you look away. you glance to the window when you see a falling leaf, burnt orange and crimson red litter the floor outside. autumn is so beautiful, a season of harvest and abundance but it's a reminder to you that nothing lasts forever, leaves fall and people leave. people talk about how autumn is maturing but omits the melancholy idea that it's just growing old, that burnt oranges and crimson reds are just rotting on the ground. your whole world is rotting with every second, the universe has it out for you and by the time you look back into the room your pen is missing.

gojo takes pleasure from seeing your face at these times, that puzzled look and biting your lip in frustration as you've lost another pen or that pout when your friend ignores you, he thinks it looks pretty on you. not that he'd ever admit that of course.

his pleasure twists though, into a new emotion- a darker emotion. you got another f and you look... sad... distraught. satoru enjoys seeing your pout when something goes wrong for you, he thinks it's pretty but he's watching you like a hawk right now, he can't take his eyes off you, he can tell you're trying desperately to hold it all together but you can't stop your eyes from welling up, it's impossible to stop your waterline brimming with tears, overflowing like a broken tap, hot tears running down your face, you attempt to quickly wipe your tears away with the back of your sleeve in hopes that nobody has seen but it's too late for that. he thought he would take pleasure in seeing you cry but instead it's pure rage. even though he's the one that's convinced all of your professors to give you f's, all he feels is fury for them making you cry. he doesn't want you to cry, he wants to keep you safe, wants to make you all his.

in the following weeks professors leave the university without announcing it to students. leaving studies and classes in a limbo for awhile. not just the professor who made you cry is gone but also iura and several others.

with that limbo period came more group projects to fill in the space of the lack of lectures. a 'little' push from satoru to higher ups and you were paired up together, leaving you no choice to spend time together and have your first conversation with each other. at this point he needed to be near you. you sit across from each other after class and you introduce yourself to each other, even though you both know who the other is, you didn't expect him to know you and he acts like he doesn't. "oh i know you, i really liked your last paper. you got an f, right? i can't believe that, it was the best one." after all your friends avoiding you and all those f's getting validation makes you shyly smile, your cheeks feel warm and you're starting to understand why people like him.

things start to change after that. your f's go back to normal and people are kinder, with everything going back to normal satoru makes sure you're still alone though, makes sure your friends continue not to talk to you. he's the only one that's allowed to do that. your friends still don't spend time with you, instead gojo does and honestly you don't mind that change, you appreciate that change, you don't know what happened with your friends but you like how gojo doesn't dismiss your emotions and opinions like they used to do.

you previously had that inkling that something was wrong with him but his easygoing smiles and playful words make you enjoy your time with him and his once overconfidence that you always used to observe which once bothered you now makes your heartbeat go crazy in your chest, like marching drums hammering away against your ribcage.

satoru notices this change in you and he takes advantage of it. this change doesn't make him lose interest in you, maybe if you were someone else it would but not with you, if anything it makes him more interested because he learns more and more without you, some with your consent and knowledge others without it. he thinks you look so cute when you smile and he loves hearing you laugh. he never really liked music but he's listened to all those music and songs you share to the world like the ones you love that you play in cars and talk to people about them, plus the more secret ones hidden in your likes and private playlists. he loves the things you do that you don't realise you're doing, the soft sighs you make when you put on a warm coat when it's cold or the hums when you drink a hot drink. how you bite your pen when you're deep in thought and linger by the door before leaving the house and locking up, mentally checking you have everything you need with you. the little moans you make when you eat something that you love, at those times satoru has to restrain himself from kissing you. he loves it all. he loves you.

you see each other whenever possible and if you can't you'll be texting, he'll send you emoji's at the end of messages that you don't understand the context to and will send you selfies and photos of cats he's seen while around town.

after the first few times at the library you tend to see each other at café because they're more relaxed and you can talk as loud as you want to. he starts paying for your lunch whenever you're together, you always used to insist to pay yourself but after the first few times you relented, he could buy you breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday for the rest of your life yet it still wouldn't make a dent in his wallet. not only does he buy you lunch now but it's much more extravagant then you could afford for yourself.

you're walking together past a store front window and gojo sees something that catches his eye, stopping where he is and pulling on your sleeve to stop you too. "look at this!"

your eyes scan the window not knowing what he's talking about, all of them are designer clothes but none of them are men's. "what are we looking at gojo?"

he grins and points to a blouse, "that would look so good on you, you'd look so cute!" 'doubtful' you think. you scoff, that is a cute blouse but no way. "hey, what was that for? it's true." he insists.

"i don't even need to go in there to see that it's way out of my price range, plus designer brands like that never have my size anyway."

"you didn't say you didn't like it."

"me liking or not liking it isn't the point."

you carry on the rest of your day like it didn't happen and you forget about the whole thing. gojo doesn't.

all of gojo's fans start to get jealous of you, it's been over three months, the limbo period is over and new people have been hired, group projects are finished but you still spend all your days together. his previous relationships have been no more than eye candy only lasting a couple weeks yet you don't even seem to be dating so why is he always smiling when you talk and is walking you everywhere. they can't comprehend it, you're a nobody.

satoru loses it one day. you've gone to hand in your library book, it's overdue and you had forgotten about it, you needed it for when you and gojo were working together but you forgot all about it. gojo's waiting outside for you, you know the librarian likes you more so you've told him it's better if you go on your own, he knows that isn't true but as long as the librarian is kind to you he won't intervene. 'if the librarian knows what's good for her she'll let it go and not upset you.'

someone gojo vaguely recognises as a cheerleader who suguru slept with a few times spots him and goes over to him, leaning against him and pushing her breasts up against him. it disgusts him. "what are you doing here gojo? don't tell me that friend of yours is making you wait for her." she says in a sickly sweet voice and his eye twitches. he doesn't reply, she should get the idea and leave. "if i were her i'd never do that. why don't you come hang out with me? me and my friends are having a party later we'd love it if you'd come. normally i wouldn't come up to you so boldly but i think i'd be able to show you a good time, not like that girl you're always spending time with, you're so out of her league." she runs her hand along his arm but he grabs it tightly making her wince.

"don't ever fucking talk about her again," gojo responds coldly. he squeezes tighter and she yelps. he lets go of arm and pushes her away, almost in revulsion that he touched her. she stumbles and leans against the wall, looking shocked. at that time you push open the door with a relieved look on your face. satoru ignores the girl, acting like she doesn't exist, he smiles brightly at you. "everything okay?"

"yeah, she was surprisingly very understanding," you return his smile and shut the door behind you. when you shut the door you see the girl leaning against the wall staring at gojo and you wonder why. you've seen lots of gojo's fans but none of them have looked at him like that. you turn your attention back to gojo, not really wanting to engage with the girl if you can help it, you've never seen her before but you can tell that she's someone who would make your life hell if you knew each other as teenagers. "is everything okay?" you ask him, vaguely gesturing to her.

he grins and strolls towards you lifting up his sunglasses and lifting up your chin to look at him, forcing you to make eye contact and in doing so you get flustered and frazzled. gojo would sometimes put his arm over your shoulder when your walking together or grab hold of you quickly from behind unexpectedly, making you jump but this is the first time it's ever been so intimate. it's also rare for you to see gojo without his sunglasses on. "everything's fine." he grins and pats your head jokingly making you glare and pout. he snickers as he sees your reaction and lets go of your chin, slinging his arm over your shoulder.

"alright, if you say so, but for lunch i'm getting extra for that, i'm not some pet." you grumble and walk off together. satoru's mind flashes with images with you on your knees, 'i think she'd make a good pet. maybe i should buy her a collar.' he snickers again and you look at him with a raised eyebrow, "what's so funny?"

"nothing," he smirks. as you walk away he turns back around to look at the girl still standing there paralysed and glares hard at the girl. normally people would be swooning when they see his bright blue eyes like the clearest spring days but not right now, they'd all be wrong, his eyes aren't clear like any warm day they're frozen over and icy, with flecks of white and all that girl feels is despair and dread. he looks at her so cruelly, it makes her unable to move- frozen in place.

you haven't seen gojo for the last few days, it's the longest you've gone without seeing him since you became friends. even if you've both been busy previously gojo makes sure to have seen you, even if it's only for a minute, but you've both been too busy. gojo has had basketball practise in the day and in the night his family demands his attendance whilst discussing family affairs and you on the other hand have been busy studying, wanting to make sure you don't get any f's again. you don't realise you won't though, everything could be incoherent with each other word being spelled terribly and you'd never get an f again, gojo's made sure of that. he won't let anyone make you cry again.

you rhythmically tap your fingers, fidgeting on the table where your laptop and textbooks are, 'i want to see him.' satoru's scored another goal, this time a three point line goal, normally he goes for slam dunks but as long as he's the one scoring it doesn't really bother him. he's got a big game coming up and you're going to be there, you're going for him, you've never been to any of the games before, not having any real interest in the sport but now your friend is the star player so you're not going to miss any games. he'll score every single point his team makes so your eyes have no option but to focus on him and after the match you'll compliment him. the coach asks him something but it's all white noise to him, 'i miss her.'

you get a text on the fourth day of not seeing him and when you read the message you smile so wide your face becomes sore. 'the last few days have been so long without you! i know we normally go out for lunch but do you want to go for dinner?'

you don't hesitate responding, 'i'd love too!'

'i'll pick you up an hour before our reservations, i've brought you something.'

'reservations? did you plan tonight? and what's this about buying me something? you already pay for my lunch.'

'i've pulled some strings xoxo see you tonight.' you scowl when you read that he's blatantly ignored your comment about buying you something and if he's went out his way to pull some strings for this meal it must be more than a fast food drive-thru or the equivalent. you didn't really expect him to take you somewhere where you can eat in your car or it's acceptable to wear a three day old top and a hoodie that is a little too small but for him to go to the effort of pulling strings this must be a sophisticated place.

half an hour later you hear your phone again, multiple messages being sent one after another, five buzzes. 'shit.' 'I FORGOT' 'i forgot to send a time!' 'i'll see you at 6.' 'pretend this never happened.' you cover your face with your phone and giggle.

by six you're ready, it's taken you longer to get ready then you'd like to admit but you wanted to look pretty, it would be embarrassing to underdress. compared to gojo anything you or any 'normal' person would wear looks cheap in comparison to all his designer clothes but you spent hours making sure it would be suitable.

it's ten past six when you hear a knock on the door. opening it you see gojo in all his glory, his attractiveness on full display and his wealthiness showing, wearing an all black giorgio armani suit with a white shirt underneath, his sunglasses look different than normal, fancier, you think you can make out a ray-ban logo. he's wearing a rolex watch which is more than double your monthly rent. his hair looks shorter than the last time you saw him, he must of had a haircut in the last few days. it's obvious the way your eyes linger on him, checking him out and gojo grins as you unknowingly fuel his pride and ego.

"awe, you look so cute princess," gojo says playfully, smirking. princess- the first time he had called you that you malfunctioned, your eyes had widened and you forgot to breath. no one else has ever called you a term of endearment before and you didn't expect your friend, satoru gojo, to be saying it. you didn't ask why he called you it, why would you? it made your fingertips tingle and the inside of your chest to warm up. "can i come in?" you nod your head and move to the side to give him enough room to come in and close the door after him. "you really do look beautiful," he says gently, you don't think you've ever heard him speak so tenderly before.

"you look good too gojo, you always do but- but tonight as well," you tell him, bashfully smiling. he grins and his eyes gleam with glee at the genuine compliment. he loves when you compliment him, it feels different than the vapid ones others offer him, even if you compliment him with only a few words it means a greater deal.

behind his back he's carrying a sleek black box with a scarlet red chiffon ribbon wrapped around it in a bow containing his gift to you, your eyes narrow when he hands it too you, although your voice is soft and quiet when you say, "it's not my birthday gojo, why are you buying me things? you don't have to do that," your voice gets quieter with each word spoken.

gojo takes your hand in his and places the box in your hand. "i can buy you things because i can. i have enough money and i want to spend it on you," he tells you firmly and your stomach flutters with butterflies but you don't know why, his hand is awfully soft maybe that's why your heart is racing or maybe it's because he spoke to you firmly like there's no room for arguments. gojo cups your cheek with his unoccupied hand and strokes it, your whole body melts at the action, "just open it 'kay?"

you nod your head and hum, relenting- just like you did when he began paying for your lunch. you delicately unwrap the bow, not wanting to ruin the box, and open it, you didn't know what to expect, you could of been given a hundred guesses and a hundred days to guess what he brought you and you still would have no clue. you pause as you open up the lid, your heart skips a beat and it's almost as if the air was stolen from your lungs like deflated balloons as you breathlessly say, "satoru! what's this?" inside the box is the blouse you were looking at all those weeks ago, the one you said was too expensive, the one you said would never fit.

'satoru' it's the first time you've ever called him by his given name and it sounds so angelic coming from your lips that he's forgotten to breathe, everything pausing and not moving. "do you like it?" he finally asks.

you nod your head in an almost daze, you're in awe that he'd really give you something so beautiful, that he would go out of his way to buy it. "i- i don't deserve this gojo."

he steps closer to you, "uh uh, what's with calling me gojo again?"

your eyes widen as you realise that only a second ago you called him by his given name, "oh! i'm so sorry! i was just in shock, i didn't mean to call you that gojo," you ramble.

he smoothed out the wrinkles of his forehead rubbing it with his fingers, which is currently caused because he finds your lack of awareness disconcerting. "that isn't what i meant princess, i want you to call me satoru. i want to give this to you."

"oh... okay," you're quiet and you've pressed your lips together to stop yourself from smiling. it won't be hard to start calling him satoru, you already call him satoru in your head. after a long pause of you trying to put your thoughts all together you start speaking again, "are you sure about this satoru? this is bound to be expensive, right? it's- it's ralph lauren isn't it? isn't this too expensive too be spending on me." gojo has to hide a smirk at that, 'has she forgotten how rich i am?' "and, and i don't want you to think that i want to spend time with you because you have money or anything!" 'ah she's adorable, i could just cancel our reservations and have her on her knees the whole night to say thank you for the blouse... i couldn't do that though, not right now... if i don't see her in that blouse in the next five minutes i'll go insane.'

"of course i'm sure about this princess, i know you'd never spend time with me for clothes from ralph lauren." he resists the urge to pull you in by your waist and kiss you, he doesn't want to overwhelm you, not at this moment.

you take the blouse out of the gift box and hold it out in front of you, there's a twinkle in your doe eyes as you look at it in wonder, knowing that this is yours, whispering, "pretty," it's barely audible. "wait, i didn't think this store went up to my size? did you go to a different store? and... how do you know my size." you ask him confused.

"i have my ways," he answers and winks at you, you scoff at the wink and narrow your eyes.

"seriously satoru," you press him. 'ah she could ask me anything and i'll tell her if she keeps calling me satoru.' "actually i know you know my size from when you've seen my coats and jumpers lying around but-" 'oh yeah... that's totally how i know...' "- how did you get it in my size?"

"annoyingly they don't actually make that particular blouse in your size... how ridiculous is that, sadly i don't have enough money and connections to make them ruined and bankrupt." he says nonchalantly, casually waving his arm around. you bark out a laugh thinking that he was joking. he wasn't. if even one article of clothing isn't made in your size it should only be fair for the brand to lose all their money and reputation, no matter what the brand is.

"hold up how do i have this if it doesn't come in my size?" you cock your head to the side quizzically and for the second time gojo thinks about buying you a collar, maybe with a matching lead...

he grins and flicks his eyes back and forth between your face and the blouse you're holding up. "obviously i got it custom made,"

"that's- that's obvious?!" you splutter and he laughs.

"obviously." he reiterates, enjoying your reaction- dumbstruck and lips parted in near disbelief.

"it'll take us thirty minutes to get to the restaurant princess and our reservations in about forty minutes." he lets you know and you snap out of your stupor.

"i'll just get my bag."

"hang on!" satoru rushes out before you can leave to get your bag. "you look beautiful right now princess but don't you want to see how that blouse looks on you?" you shift your weight from side to side, heat rising to your cheeks. 'do i really have time to get changed? i spent so long choosing this outfit too.' before you can say something gojo stops you, not wanting to give you an opportunity to say no or think to hard about it. he wants you to do it, you don't have to have an opinion on the matter, leave that him. sometimes you can't be trusted when it comes to these things. "come on princess, i'm the one who brought you it. just wear it, please. i want to make sure it fits properly."

you yield, "okay let me go get changed."

satoru smirks, 'good girl.'

as you come back out of the bedroom adrenaline bursts through his veins. you twirl around, pausing when you circle back round to gojo and picking up the hem of your skirt playfully with one hand and doing a half curtsy, it's such a happy coincidence that the blouse pairs so well with the skirt you're already wearing, "how do i look?" 'beautiful, stunning, breathtaking, ethereal.'

"perfect," he replies dreamily and you giggle, thinking he isn't being serious and is exaggerating.

"i'm serious satoru," you tell him, it was meant to sound firm and like you won't back down until you get an answer but it just turned out sounding a little whiny.

gojo smirks and leisurely saunters to you, stopping when coming up close in front of you, "you look truly beautiful sweetheart." 'sweetheart' he's never called you that before. you don't know if your heart can keep taking it all. satoru's your friend, your close friend, but at times like this it's hard to remember that.

you bite your lip to stop yourself from smiling- admittedly unsuccessfully. the corners of your mouth still quirk up and your round cheeks become more predominate. you fight the desire to cover your face with your hands in embarrassment, instead opting to twiddle your fingers. "sh-should we get going?"

satoru grins at you, "sure thing."

the whole drive you're both stealing looks at each other when you can get away with it while making small talk and satoru's not letting you know where you're going saying that it's a surprise. whenever there's a red light gojo takes his time to admire you and as you step outside into the night you're astonished at the restaurant in front of you. satoru's handing his car keys to a valet to park his car but you're distracted from that, finally knowing where you're eating tonight. you know this place, well you know of this place. never in a million years would you have thought you'd be dining here, it's so lavish that the cutlery is more expensive than buying a house that's already furnished. "are you okay princess?" you snap out of your daze and nod your head. "alright then, let's go inside."

you follow closely behind gojo, nervous as you enter, you don't think you've ever felt more out of place. satoru doesn't even give his name, the man at the desk recognises him straight away, "ah mr. gojo if you'd follow me." the man leads you upstairs and you hear him asking satoru questions but all that's going through your mind is 'please don't trip, please don't trip.' you're quite accident prone and falling down these stairs would be too much to handle. he takes you all the way to the fourth floor and near the window where you can see the city lights shining below. "here you are."

when the man leaves satoru pulls out a chair for you and you're startled by the gesture. you take your seat and he takes his. "you're more gentlemanly then i expected you to be satoru, pulling out my chair for me," you pause for a second mulling your thoughts over before adding, "or is that normal etiquette?"

"i'm very chivalrous, i'll have you know," he replies pouting and you raise an eyebrow at how fake his answer sounded. he throws his hands up with a smirk, "well, i'm not always chivalrous but if a pretty lady is in front of me than i can become very courteous." you chuckle, trying not to hone in the pretty part for your own sanity.

you glance at the table and worry because satoru might know proper etiquette but you don't. you know the general rules and ideas but why are there two knives and forks next to your plate and a spoon as well? why are there two glasses, a wine one and a normal one? why does the napkin look fancy? does that mean it's just for decoration, what if you need it? you're worried that you'll leave smudges in places where there shouldn't be and what if the table cloth rips? maybe this was a mistake...

"hey," satoru says softly catching your attention, when you look back up at him you see his smirk has turned into a frown and you don't think you've seen that expression on his face before, it doesn't fit right. he's taken off his sunglasses and placed them down, hanging them out of his suit pocket. his striking baby blue eyes glinting when the chandelier droplets move in the light. his snowy white hair looking soft and subdued under the glow of the light and the wavering flame of the candle. "sweetheart, whatever you're thinking right now isn't true."

"how did y-"

he cuts you off before you can finish asking. "because i know you and i know that look on your face, that overthinking look, i can see all those unnecessary cogs turning in your brain."

"i just..." you look away from him, not wanting to look into his eyes any longer knowing you'll crumble but gojo's not allowing that. with how long his arms are it's not difficult reaching over the table to you, placing his fingers below your chin and tilting your head around to look at him.

"just what? sweetheart." satoru presses you.

bunching up your skirt into tight fists you take a shaky breath and try again, "i'm worried i don't belong here. this is a really lovely place satoru and i just... what if i embarrass you? i'm not like you, i don't know when to do certain things or say specific things, i don't know why the table is placed like it is or any of it," after the words stop spewing out your mouth you take another breath, this time not shaky and deep. you look relieved to get it out.

'silly girl.' "do you really think i'd get embarrassed because of you sweetheart? nothing you could do would make me embarrassed. i'm lucky that you're with me right now. i don't care if you don't know all the rules and you shouldn't either, all that matters is that we're here together and we get to finally see each other after some hectic few days," gojo tells you earnestly, his body close to the edge of the table, leaning forward further near you, his voice low and intimate, like what he's saying is a complete secret for your ears only. the days were hectic and finally you're getting to see each other. those tedious meetings with his family and hours of basketball that seemed to stretch on and on but finally- you're together again.

your shoulders sag, you weren't even aware that your plush figure had tensed up in the first place. when satoru saw how you relaxed your posture he picks up one of the menus, "everything okay now?" he asks you, his eyes soft as they gaze at you.

"yeah, i think so." you lick your lips, wetting them after getting dry, the intense spike of emotions throwing your body threw a little bit of a loop, dry lips, moist eyes, with shaky fingers.

gojo grins and leans back on his chair, seeming more casual than a minute ago and hands you a menu. "what are you thinking about getting? i might go for the lobster."

you're browsing the menu but when you hear him you put it down momentarily to reply, "oh please, like you care about the lobster, you just want dessert," you say grinning wide.

gojo gasps and places his hands on his chest in mock offence. "dessert? i think you mean desserts." you laugh, eyes crinkling in amusement. "i want you to enjoy this meal just as much as i'm planning to, that's why i intend to get the lobster, i don't want you to feel like you have to rush while eating just because i want dessert and i don't want you to even think about a silly thing like money." 'so he's ordering one of the biggest and expensive dishes? ...that does sound like satoru actually.' although you would be none the wiser about the prices of these meals, it's one of those high-end restaurants that doesn't have the prices on the menu, satoru must have been here often enough to know how much the lobster costs compared to other dishes.

"i don't know what to do about drinks, i hear they've got a fine collection of wines, maybe we should order a couple bottles? do you like wine?" he already knows the answer to that but you don't know that. "they've also got a wide selection of spirits and non-alcoholic drinks too, i believe."

you both order what you want, making idle conversation while waiting.

by the time your food arrives satoru has tried to convince you that you should've ordered a bigger meal, you're content with your choice in the end though and it's not the most surprising that when your food does arrive there's also a side dish for you to which you didn't order.

"i didn't order this satoru," you raise an eyebrow.

gojo smirks, "i know you didn't, but i did. i didn't want you to be hungry and we haven't had lunch together in days have you been eating properly?"

"are you suggesting that because i'm eating food in my price bracket instead of yours that it's not good enough? the food you pay for is definitely better but poor people food taste good too."

he chuckles and smiles at you fondly before replying, "that's not what i'm saying and you know i'm not. I am however asking have you been eating three meals a day?" you wince. "i thought not."

"i've been busy with studies, i didn't have time to eat three meals a day every single day," you try to justify.

"that's exactly what i mean. i won't take any excuses though, you shouldn't have skipped any meals." satoru lightly scowls you but don't take it too seriously, you should have though. 'silly girl, she really can't look after herself properly. it's a good thing i'm here to keep an eye on her. she just can't be trusted on her own.'

you pout at his reasoning, it's not often that gojo reprimands you or anyone you've seen for that matter. knowing that you don't have a leg to stand on you keep quiet.

when you eat the first bite of your food you hum blissfully, so close to being a moan and it's music to satoru's ears, 'god she's adorable.' he doesn't even realise that he isn't eating until you noticed that he's unmoving. "satoru are you okay? you're not eating."

"i'm fine sweetheart just thinking about something," he responds with a smile.

"okay- if you're sure but make sure you eat soon or it'll get cold."

"yes ma'am," satoru gives you a cheeky smile and picks up his fork.

your face heats up in embarrassment and you lose any composure that you previously had. you avert you eyes and focus on the tablecloth, suddenly finding it very interesting, focusing on the material. you never knew being called something would make you feel so strange, it was the complete opposite to gojo calling you princess or sweetheart.

even though satoru picked up his fork and began eating he didn't take his eyes off you at the corner of his eye, he wanted to see your reaction to that name. he wanted to test how docile you are, his theory that you are submissive and it seems he was right, although even if he wasn't and his theory was proven wrong he'd just mold you into what he wants. 'of course she's so perfect that i don't need to change her, she's such a good girl.'

quickly ma'am leaves your head with the more delicious food you have but you can't help some negative thoughts enter your mind. everything starts to feel too good to be true, the twinkling lights and the flickering of the candle on the table, the scenery and the ambience, the delectable food and the amazing beverages, the dream company with someone who you care so very much about, you wouldn't want to be anywhere else and... it just all feels too good to be true.

'how many girls does gojo come here with? they knew who he was without giving his name. i know i'm not his girlfriend. it's not like i'm jealous it's just- i want this so bad to be special. am i one in a long line?' you have to ask, you have to know. if you're not special you need to know.

"satoru-" you start by getting his attention.

he looks up at you and sees the pensive look on your face, he puts his cutlery down and ceases eating, directing all his attention to you, "yes princess?"

"can i ask you something?" you ask, hesitant and more meekly now you have his attention.

"of course you can princess," he smiles and waits for you to ask whatever it is. he truly doesn't know what it could be right now.

"am i special? i mean- wait- not special. i mean do you take lots of girls here? they seemed to know your name already so do you? i know we're friends so it wouldn't be the same as you taking other girls here but do you take lots of girls here?"

he doesn't even try to stop the smirk that creeps onto his face, you're jealous and what's even better do you even know that you're jealous. satoru can barely contain his excitement.

not once have you brought up other girls, not once. you've never asked if it's true that he doesn't date anyone for longer than a month or that he's gone through half the school. you've never asked about the crude gossip about how big his dick is and how he's the best anyone has ever had even though he knows you've definitely heard those rumours. but right now? right now your words hint of jealously and insecurity.

satoru tells the truth as he replies simply "i haven't brought any girls here." gojo dangles the small piece of information in front of you, it isn't a question of if you'll take it and ask further questions he knows you will but he wants to hear you ask for more, it thrills him.

"you-you dont?" you ask for more explanation.

he grins, "nope," he pops the 'p'. "i go here with my family and on occasion suguru but only sometimes with suguru because it can be kind of intimate with two people," he explains and you giggle at the thought of the two of them sitting across from each other here. he carries on his explanation, "i would never go here with other girls, of course you're special," he tells you honestly and your lips part, hanging onto every word spoken.

'i'm special.' you press your lips together but the corners of your mouth still manage to lift up into a small smile. your brain then fully catches up with everything he said and your heart beats erratically, just now satoru said a dinner here between two people is intimate, he didn't word it in that exact way but if a dinner for two with suguru is intimate, a dinner for two with you might be considered intimate too. overall you're pleased with the answer you were given, gojo thinks your special and he doesn't take other girls here.

you eat the rest of your dinner without incident, enjoying every single mouthful and letting gojo know that it's tasty, thanking him. when you order dessert it's no surprise that satoru goes a bit overboard nearly buying the whole dessert menu, not that you would ever complain about a thing like that, the more time you've spent with gojo the more of a sweet tooth you've become yourself.

satoru doesn't attempt to hide the bill, he enjoys the look on your face when you see the amount in the corner of your eye. for him the money is trivial sum but to you it's shockingly high. he gets a power trip when he sees your eyes widen at the money.

"do you want to come back to mine?" satoru asks you while you leave the restaurant and you agree not thinking anything of it. he's been to yours before but you've never been to his. you don't think there's anything behind his question, you don't even consider he's suggesting something and gojo's well aware that you don't realise.

you don't speak much on your way back, you're leaning against the window and watching the city lights, it's starting to drizzle and you feel at ease in your current company, your eyes fluttering, slightly drowsily, as you hear the rain. gojo taps his fingers on the steering wheel and smiles thinking about how adorable you look right now.

the journey back to satoru's could've taken ten minutes to an hour for all you know as your mind wanders and your eyelids get heavy. when you arrive and he parks up and you get out of the car, you shiver a bit as the cold air hits you, giving you a shock and getting rid of any lingering tiredness and satoru walks around the car to be next to you. he pouts as he bends down to look at you, his sunglasses still in his jacket pocket, "pretty ladies aren't just supposed to have their chair pulled out for them, they're meant to have doors open for them too."

you giggle and bump against him, "flattery will get you nowhere mister." it does. luckily you'll be able to blame your flushed face due to the bitterly cold if gojo questions you on it.

"let's get inside sweetheart, it's cold." 'sweetheart' something else you can luckily blame on the weather. you're not expecting satoru to randomly touch your face though so you think you're going to be okay.

you follow him inside and the size of his place is a large as you thought it would be, you're learning to expect everything he owns is extravagant. the interior however is something you take note of, you've only entered one room but it seems barren. the walls are drab, painted slate grey and off white with only the bare necessaries of furniture and nothing more. devoid of any human presence. you're not even sure if he's lived here long and when he looks at you he can see those unnecessary cogs turning in your head again. "is something on your mind princess?"

"um-" you don't really know if you should bring it up but your curiosity gets the better of you. "have you lived here long?"

"a couple of years," satoru leans against the wall and smirks.

"i just- there's not a lot of stuff in here, it looks like you still have unpacking to do."

he pushes himself off the wall and goes over to you, "do you think i should get more stuff? like cushions for the the sofa and posters on the wall?" you feel gojo's breath against your skin as he leans down to talk in your ear quietly, it's so intimate, your mind draws a blank finding it hard to think with him so close to you. satoru is playful and he's teasing and you've heard rumours that he's a flirt but he's never been this close to you before, you've never been able to smell his cologne and been this close to feel his warm breath against your neck. "maybe we should go shopping together and you could help me pick out some stuff?" you're holding your breath, not being able to breathe anymore. "or maybe it would be better if you just stayed here and brought your stuff along? you do always complain about your rent being high."

you take a sharp intake of air and move a step away from him so you can look back at him in the eye. mentally shaking your head to forgot about his remark. 'did gojo just say about me being his roommate? i'd get to see him everyday... wait... i'd have to hear him all the time when he brings home girls and does he even clean after himself properly?'

"did you have too much to drink tonight satoru? you know you shouldn't drink and drive," you reply with light tone, reminding yourself not to think too hard about the situation, almost being successful in your mission.

satoru just watches you and smirks as he sees you try to ignore his comment. "anyway i don't think you need a roommate." 'roommate? yeah i don't need one of those...'

"and for all i know you might steal my food from the fridge and not wash up the dishes. plus i always forget my towel when i shower." you say the last sentence flippantly, but satoru's mind fills with thoughts of you... 'walking out of the shower into the living room with a small towel on, barely covering your body, body damp with water dripping down your neck, onto your shoulders down to the valley of your breasts...' he's getting hard just imagining it.

"are you okay satoru? you're a bit red." you question and the topic of conversation changes.

satoru moves back away from you, "i'm okay princess, probably thirsty. do you want a drink?" he's glad of this change, he'd like to tease you more but there'd be a real chance you'd see his erection, he could probably tease you about it if you'd notice it but he doesn't think you're ready yet. he wants to make sure you're relaxed and comfortable. you've got a long night ahead of you.

"sure."

following him into the kitchen you take a seat on one of the kitchen counter stools. "what would you like to drink?"

not wanting to ask for something he might not have or cause a fuss you respond with, "whatever you're having is good with me."

'she's so predictable.' he pours both of you your favourite drink, he knows all your preferences, of course he's stocked up on everything you like. he hands it to you and you smile wide, "this is like my all time favourite drink, i didn't know you liked it too."

in situations like this he switches his answers up from time to time not wanting you to get suspicious. "do you like these too? the amount i get through weekly is crazy." he makes sure to separate things into two categories, things you've told him and things you haven't but he knows anyway. he wouldn't want to mention in conversation about how he remembers that you like these drinks when you've never told so.

satoru likes when he tells you things that subtly suggest, 'look how much we have in common. we like all the same music and drinks!'

he prefers when he tells you he remembers something you told him, you quietly replying to him once about how much it means to you because "no one has ever cared about me to remember something so mundane about me." he swears that he'll remember everything about you, he swore he'd never forget a single thing.

gojo takes his place next to you, sitting on the stool and purposely brushing his hand against your rib, under your breast, and he gets pleasure from seeing you straighten up your back.

you both enjoy your drinks and kick your legs in the air. "i feel bad because you've been driving me around all night. when i go i'll get an uber or cab or something."

gojo frowns, "are you going now?"

"n-no! unless you want me to?" you don't want to overstay your welcome and you have a feeling that if gojo wanted you to go he'd let you know and you want to look around the other rooms if you have a chance, perhaps not his bedroom for privacy reasons but you want to see if his other rooms have plain decoration and if the bathroom has any noteworthy products in, you have always wanted to know how his skin looks so good all the time.

"i'm definitely not telling you to leave princess... in fact why don't you stay the night? you can stay in the spare room. no pressure though. you don't have to but there might not be anywhere you can get a lift because of how late it is and how it's the other side of town adding that all onto it's now pouring down. i'd offer to take you back myself but i'm not a huge fan of driving in the dark, especially if the roads are slippy 'cause to the rain. it's your choice. i'm sure you'll get someone to take you eventually but it might be less effort to stay here and leave tomorrow?"

he knows you don't want to wait forever getting home, he knows you want to take him up on his offer but something is stopping you, he doesn't know what is it for a moment until he figures it. "it's absolutely no bother, i don't mind and i've got clothes that you can wear, i think i wore them to lounge about in on tuesday so i haven't had time to wash them yet but i don't think that's a huge problem. i wear them a lot but they're too big on me, you should fit in them."

that small comment might have upset you more if it came from someone else but you don't think gojo meant it maliciously, you think it came from a good place, however you couldn't help thinking about it, the words 'they're too big on me, you should fit in them' ring around your head, about how you should fit in them. you know that satoru didn't mean anything by that but you've never worn someone else's clothes before so it gives you a bit of anxiety and satoru can see that.

gojo speaks again in an attempt to stop you from other thinking. "if you did want to go i'll give you the money to get a cab but if not you can stay, it's no problem, in fact i would enjoy it." your eyes snap up to look at him and you see a soft smile adorning his face. "we could watch that new film you were telling me about and i don't mean to brag but my shower is amazing, nothing compares, even five star hotels." you crack a smile but your mind still lingers on the clothes. satru can see that still not fully convinced and there's something stopping you, "is this about the clothes?" you shift your eyes away nervously not wanting to admit how you clung to a few words. gojo stops himself from sighing in exasperation. "if you'd feel more comfortable keeping the blouse and skirt on you can, you do look good in them but you shouldn't overthink about wearing my clothes. i know i said they're not clean but i've only worn them once since they've been washed it's not like they're diseased." you giggle and satoru gets less exasperated after hearing you laugh.

"they'll fit you if that's what you're worried about and honestly even if they are a little tight you'd still look good in my shirt, it would just hang onto your hips a bit." your mouth parts, the previous throwaway remark being swiped away like smoke by his hand, instead being replaced by insurance that it will fit and if by the off chance it doesn't then it's not the end of the world. he hopes it doesn't fit.

it quells your mind and you agree to stay. "thank you satoru, i'd appreciate staying, over the hassle of getting home."

he grins at your answer, hands itching to take off your blouse. "do you want a shower now so we can watch that film?"

"sounds good." you follow him into the bathroom and it looks like the living room, crystal clean, newly moved into, the only difference is his electric toothbrush on the side and moisturiser. gojo doesn't leave when he shows you into the room, he doesn't leave when he makes a quick explanation about how the shower works, in fact he didn't tell you at all. instead of telling you he turns the shower on, adjusting the handle to change the temperature to the one you prefer and pressing a button next to the handle, keeping his finger on it for a few seconds before removing it, changing the water pressure. "here you go princess," he grins and turns back to you. you think to yourself about how you could of figured out how to work the shower but you don't vocalise it, you've been in enough showers to know how they work but satoru's one is probably different if he did it himself.

"oh, the shower wash and shampoo is there, i don't know if you want to wash your hair but it's there if you need it. you'll have to use my one." he then leaves, before placing a towel on the sink for you to grab when you get out. he owns all the soaps and scents you use but you can't use them, he doesn't want to share. if he gave you them you'd be suspicious and there would be less for him to use when he misses your smell, groaning in the shower after he gets home from basketball his hands massaging your shampoo into his scalp, one hand in his hair the other fisting his cock. he'll buy you new perfumes and soaps for the holidays, he would never change any of your signature scents but you deserve more expensive products in his eyes.

a part of you still can't help but think about the clothes but when you step into the shower your eyes close and body relaxes, somehow it's the perfect way you like your showers. all of it melts away and as you pick up gojo's shower wash your body heats up inside. you're going to use the same soap as gojo uses and once you recognise how you reacted you shake your head to get away from all those thoughts. everybody at your university would likely have the same reaction as you but you're not just anyone, satoru is your dear friend and he deserves more respect than you just gave him. you don't spend long showering, wanting to not use his soap for a long period and you end up not washing your hair.

you dry yourself but panic as you can't find clothes anywhere, did satoru forget? maybe the plan was for you to put your clothes back on until he's gave you them. opening the door ajar you peek outside, you're planning on seeing if you can hear satoru, asking him about the clothes but before you can you see a shirt on the floor next to the door. picking it up, you close the door quickly and breathe deeply, glad that you noticed the shirt before calling out to gojo.

when you start to slip into the shirt you feel a repeat of the shower, it smells so much like him. you didn't realise when you agreed to this you'd have to be concerned about this but you are and it's making you feel guilty. like you're no better than those girls who throw themselves at him, only based on appearances alone. you put it on as quickly as you can and try to ignore the smell but the entire room is filled with it. it smells different to the soap, it smells more like him, 'his natural scent?' you ponder. it effects you differently than it would his fans though, they'd be filled with thoughts that are less than appropriate, like being pushed into his pillow while he's taking them from behind or not wasting time with getting completely nude but to you they're innocent, the smell is comforting like when he surprises you by suddenly grabbing you from behind or crowding your space as you worked on projects together. it's not the smell of satoru gojo, famous 'womaniser', 'manwhore', 'heartbreaker', with a reputation that would make a nymphomaniac blush, it's the smell of satoru gojo- your gojo. and annoyingly your gojo, your friend, smells really good.

satoru was right about the shirt. because of how tall he is it reached down to your thigh, you were slightly worried about accidentally flashing him but it was long enough not to worry too much about it. he was also right about how it clung to you. even though it clung to you it didn't make you feel uncomfortable, the fabric stretched a tad around your hips and chest but it didn't make you feel uneasy, you doubt satoru would even notice. he, of course, does. and takes great pleasure in it.

you fold up the towel and leave it in the laundry basket. exiting the room you hear satoru and go to him. he hears you near him entering the room and looks up from the sofa, "you okay?"

you smile sweetly and nod your head, "i'm okay, it was a good shower."

he returns your smile, "i'm glad."

satoru doesn't hide his staring as you move to the sofa to sit down next to him. you're so cute and you're so hot all he can do is stare and he's so thankful that you agreed to come to his and stay. he's never let anyone wear his clothes before, it's a boundary that he doesn't cross. his previous relationships weren't allowed to wear his clothes, if it was cold outside and someone didn't bring a coat he wouldn't give them his, he never cared about them that much to do things like that but when you walk in wearing his clothes his heart jumps with joy. he never thought about how much he'd love seeing you wear his shirt, it's not just a shirt it's a statement, you're his, he owns you. it barely covers your thighs and he knows if he gets you to move and bend down, even if only slightly, everything will be on display. his shirt is clinging to your curves and he's practically salivating as your hips look so grabbable.

you're none the wiser of this and when he turns on the film you previously spoken about he was paying more attention to you than the television, every so often shuffling a little bit closer to you. he doesn't wait long, it's been about twenty minutes through the film before he puts his arm around you, he slings his arm around your shoulder when you walk together sometimes so it's not the first time this has happened. this is regular behaviour in your eyes.

forgetting his arm is even around you you become invested in what you're watching, you were right to mention it to gojo, it's exceeded your expectations. you have no reaction to satoru taking his arm off your shoulder and instead placing it on your plush thigh. he has more of a reaction that you do, biting his lip to stop any noises that could come out because you would likely notice if he groaned. after a couple of minutes of his hands being still he starts moving, making small patterns on your skin and stroking you. his hand gets higher, reaching the hem of his shirt before stopping and leaving his hand there.

as the film ends you become more aware of where gojo's hand is resting but you choose not to say anything. you're flustered but you think he's put his hand there absentmindedly while watching the film so you keep quiet.

"did you enjoy the film princess?"

you smile brightly at him and respond, "i did! did you?"

satoru starts making patterns on your skin lightly again. tapping his finger on his chin with his other hand like he's thinking and making a noise, "hmmm i did enjoy it although i was distracted through most of it."

that catches your attention wondering what it was that he was focused on instead. "oh, what was it?"

he smirks, "it's hard to pay attention to anything other than how pretty you look right now."

satoru had called you a pretty lady earlier tonight but this feels more personal, your brain refusing to work and it's exhilarating for him to see it happen.

he cups your cheek in his hand so you're making direct eye contact with each other, he doesn't want to look away from him. "do you want this sweetheart?"

your heart is pounding in your chest like a hummingbirds wings and you worry that satoru can hear it, swallowing before replying, "w-what do you mean?"

he leans closer to you and feel like your body is buzzing, tiny zaps of electricity shooting through your veins at his proximity to you, "do you want me?"

"i-i," you're stuttering over your words and nothing makes sense. do you want him? want him to do what?

"sweetheart do you want me?" he reiterates putting more emphasis on the 'want' and slivering his hand up further along your thigh, inching under your, his, shirt. you wait with bated breath, wondering if he'll go further, wondering if he'll say more.

"satoru are you... are you coming onto me?" you're quiet when you ask, you're unsure, you worry that you're wrong and gojo can't help but laugh.

"obviously i'm coming onto you. i thought that was pretty clear."

"you are?" you're still quiet.

"yeah," he smirks at you however your eyes drift away from him feeling shy but gojo's not having that, he pats your cheek before saying, "look at me princess." you do what he says and make eye contact with him again, "there she is, "he smiles at you and kisses your nose making your whole body heat up, your lips part open in shock and he smirks.

"i'm going to ask again, do you want this?" lowering his voice he continues speaking, "because i want this."

'he wants this. he wants me... but do i want him? everyone wants him. do i want him? if we do this it might never be the same again, we might stop being friends... satoru is really attractive, he's hot, he can get anyone he wants but will this mess everything up... i don't know.'

he can see those unnecessary cogs again, how silly, how useless.

he doesn't wait for you to answer, he's given you time and instead of answering you're thinking, overthinking, not being a good girl at all. instead of waiting any longer he closes the space between you two and slots his mouth against yours, licking your lips in a silent request to open your mouth, you oblige his request without any more thought and just simply do what feels right, do what feels good, and kissing satoru feelings good.

his lips are soft, probably softer than yours but you can't tell with them against each other. imaging the kiss you'd think gojo would kiss someone slowly, languidly. you imagine he wouldn't put a lot of effort or passion in the kiss but it would still be the best kiss anyone has ever had. you never thought he'd be a passionate kisser. you know from rumours that his relationships don't last long, it seems to you that he's never been invested in any of them so what's the point in kissing someone like you can't get enough of them when he's going to move on to the next person in a week, so what's the point of kissing passionately but right now that theory is blown out the window. his movement is rushed, it's hungry, it's unexpected. you didn't think he'd be so greedy. his skilled tongue is against yours and he's completely dominating the kiss. satoru's not even stopping for air and he's not letting you either, he's been waiting for this for so long now and a stupid reason like needing to breathe isn't going to stop him.

satoru's leaving wet kisses down your jaw and pulse point anywhere that's visible he's kissing. leaving little nips in his wake and trying to find a good space for him to start leaving marks and hickeys so everyone will know you're his.

the hand that was holding onto your thigh squeezes gently and a shiver runs down his spine because you feel so soft. he pushes you down on the sofa and he's above you looking down, knocking your thighs open and kneeling between them. he's swears he's never seen a more beautiful sight. you get nervous when you look at him, the way he looks at you tenderly with those vibrant blue eyes, that unbeknownst to you hold so much love for you.

you're gasping at every new sensation gojo's giving you, never having felt like this before as his continues his path up your thigh moving the shirt up along with it and now he's finally touching your plush body he thinks he may be in heaven with a gorgeous goddess with him and the more he moves the shirt up the more he thinks so. both of his hands moving to your hips and pressing his fingers into your skin watching them spill over and it's making him dizzy. never has he felt anyone with your body before and it's driving him crazy. he wants more, he needs more.

satoru brushes his knuckles over your underwear making you whine and he smirks, "feel good princess?"

"uh huh," you reply nodding your head up and down rapidly, head fuzzy and wanting more, wanting him.

"yeah?" he asks smugly. " ' course you do." he taps your hips just above the line of your underwear, "lift up for me sweetheart." you move up so he can pull down your underwear and he pockets them in his jeans saving them for later. he doesn't waste anytime as he unzips his jeans and takes them off, pulling his shirt off after, the only reason of the shirt being off is that he wants you to see how hot he looks and to check him out, he knows he looks good and he wants you to know it too.

he presses two fingers into you and you moan. "i'm going to prepare you sweetheart." it wasn't a question but you nod your head anyway. his slender fingers are longer than yours, reaching placing you can't, he's leisurely taking his time, watching as you squirm, eyes starting to glaze over.

only after four minutes and he's had enough of this leisurely pace fingering though, he just has to have his dick inside you now. he would promise to go slow but he knows he can't promise that. you don't see his dick before he goes into you, if you did you'd say something but instead you feel it. more girth than most and nine inches long thus as he starts to thrust into you you let out a moan that soon fades into a silent scream.

with each inch you feel that it must be it but then there's more, he knows he should've spent more time getting you ready for him but the idea of waiting even a minute longer was torture.

at the same time of being fully inside you, you wince, and satoru places a chaste kiss on your lips. there's a fleeting thought as you wince about how you think his cock has broken you, so far he's in your guts. he keeps his hold on you as he thrusts shallowly a few times testing the waters and playfully pinching your nipple to see your reaction.

you try to speak but the words get caught in your throat and it doesn't take long for gojo to speed up, not even a minute and he's already thrusting hard and fast into you, a creamy white ring already forming at the base of his cock. his pace doesn't falter, in fact it gets more rough as satoru sees your face. it's hard for you to even think, you've never been this full before, you're eyes are glazed over and you've got your mouth open drooling a bit, he thinks you look so adorably dumb. "look at you princess you look so dumb right now, so stupid. you don't even have one thought in your head do you? it's so fucking hot. not thinking or worrying, all that matters is this, you don't need to think i'll do it for you."

satoru lifts up one of your thighs and puts it on his shoulder, at the new position it feels like he's reaching even deeper. you whine so loud that people walking outside would hear. "my cock's making you lose braincells huh?" he grins, tapping your cheek gently to get your attention. you look up at him in a daze and he sniggers. "not a thought behind those eyes."

at the new angle you try to grab hold of his arm but struggle to focus losing grip straight away, squealing, "ah it feels s' good 'toru!"

satoru is pleased that you've spoken something, that you've been able to form an legible sentence, he's even more pleased at how good you sound squealing, knowing that he's the one who's made you sound like that. however more than all of that he's overjoyed that you called him 'toru' it sounds so perfect from your mouth.

"i know, i know, you're so good for me princess, such a good girl." he keeps slamming into you at a brutal pace and he wants you to come undone around him soon before he cums. "hear that princess, your pussy is so wet and sticky for me. she knows what she wants huh," he grins and starts pinching your nipples, watching as your eyes roll back.

he's fucking you so rough that your body is moving up and down on the sofa, jiggling with each thrusts, and as he watches your body bounce he gets closer and closer. he normally lasts so much longer but he can't help it with you, it's impossible for him to keep his regular time when your warm wet walls are wrapping around his cock, when he's inside you.

satoru can't wait any longer removing his hand from your nipple and bringing it to your clit, rubbing harshly as you shriek from the sudden extra stimulation, as you get tighter around him he sucks his teeth so close to cumming, "are you going to cum for me sweetheart?"

you don't say anything, you don't have time to answer him because instead the coil in the stomach that has been winding up for the last half an hour snaps, with the added help of gojo touching your clit, you arch your back, and your eyesight goes fuzzy seeing white dots. you've never had such an intense orgasm before, it drowned out noise and made everything hard to hear, you didn't even know cumming could do that. everyone was right about sex with satoru.

feeling you spasm around him was even for him to finish as well, a few more thrusts into you and he lost it cumming too. if he was a better man he would've pulled out but satoru knew that he would never pull out when it comes to you. he's seen birth control in your bathroom before and when he saw it he frowned, he hopes that you missed it today. either way he's making sure to bury himself in you as deep as he can get hoping that even if you did take birth control today it won't be good enough to stop his intention- his deep desire to breed you. thoughts racing through his head, 'silly girls don't need to go to university they should just stay at home. i've got more than enough money to look after her. she'd look so good, her body even softer than it already is. she'd make such a good mama.' as he comes his body goes taut and he groans loudly saying your name and stilling.

you're both catching your breathe, not speaking for a minute, recovering for the most mindblowing sex both of you have ever had.

he wants to stay where he is but he knows he can't. when he moves you whimper, feeling empty all of a sudden, and it makes his ego rise, "sorry princess, i'm going to get you a towel okay." satoru kisses your forehead before rising and getting a towel from the bathroom, coming back and kneeling, swiping the towel gently over your inner thighs and pussy. kissing your hip and looking back at you, "are you okay?"

you're breathless as you reply, "yeah."

satoru smirks, "that's good."

you cover your face with your hands, timid with the way gojo's focused on you. putting the towel down he holds onto your hands and removes them from your face so he can see you again, smiling at you sweetly and kissing your forehead again.

"satoru what's going to happen now?" you're almost silent, if he wasn't so laser focused on every movement and thing you do he might not have heard.

"we could watch another film but it's getting late."

"no... i mean with us..."

satoru furrows his eyebrows, not understanding the question. "us?"

"yeah i-i mean are we s-still friends?"

"friends?" he looks at you like you've grown an extra head and your stomach sinks, if you knew this would've been the outcome you would've done something differently.

you don't want to lose gojo, you really don't want to lose gojo. you don't want to cry in front of him, you don't want it to get misconstrued and him to think that you're trying to manipulate him or change his mind but the idea of not having satoru in your life is heartbreaking. wait... heartbreaking? however the tears still come and the words get lodged in your throat. you manage to get some words out but it's barely audible with how erratic your breathing is becoming and how you keep swallowing every five seconds. "can i do anything to make us be friends again? i don't want to lose you." you're sniffling and you know you sound needy and probably desperate too but that's not your main focus right now.

"lose me?" he squints and gently wipes the tears from your face. "why would you lose me?" he cups you cheek, "princess how do you feel about me?"

your mouth parts open, you're glad that he's suggesting that you're not going to lose him but that's completely overshadowed with the question he's asked. you stay silent, not moving a muscle, how do you feel about him?

'satoru's my friend, my best friend! so... i feel that he's my friend? did i feel this way about my other friends? i lost my other friends and it was awful, i hated it but if i lost satoru... i think it would be worse than awful. maybe soul crushing is accurate... heartbreaking sounds more accurate. can someone be heartbroken about a friend? can i?'

you can't say anything, you don't know what to say, all your thoughts are muddled and you feel lost. gojo's still cupping your cheek, now stroking it with his thumb. "alright then princess, let me tell you." you don't know how he's going to tell you, you don't even understand yourself. "you don't see me as a friend anymore." he says simply and your eyes widen, and he holds onto your elbow with no force with his other hand to stop you if you try to draw away.

"do you know why i know that princess?" satoru asks you, his voice tethered, borderlining on husky. unsure you shake your head. "because friends don't act like you do. they don't get jealous about the thought of me taking girls out to restaurants, they don't check me out when they think i'm not looking. friends don't make a photo of us together as their lockscreen and wallpaper-"

at that you interrupt him, "you have me on your lockscreen too!" but he puts his fingers to your lips to gesture for you to keep quiet.

"not finished yet sweetheart. friends don't send each other good morning texts as soon as they wake up and they don't memorise my order at cafés we go to. friends don't stare at my lips and compliment my eyes all the time. friends don't look at me longingly. friends don't go to romantic restaurants alone together."

he pauses watching with rapt attention as you look down at your lap, he doesn't make you look up at him this time and waits for your response. when you decide to look back at him you calm your breathing as much as you can, "b-but you do those things too satoru..."

satoru grins brightly, "yeah i do, sooo... that would mean what?" he presses you to answer him.

"do you- do you- am i more than a friend to you satoru?"

"bingo!"

you feel like you're dreaming, nothing feels real. you could never of guessed that gojo feels that way or that you're his type. "is that why we had sex?"

satoru chuckles, not answering but instead replying, "you're so cute!" it makes your face heat up. "do you want me to tell you a secret?" you're nervous and dubious but you nod your head softly. gojo moves even closer than you, "you're more than just my friend princess," he leans closer to your ear and whispers "i love you."

you blink at him- once, twice, three times. you understand now that gojo is more than a friend to you and you recognise it's been this way for a very long time but through all his speech you didn't consider he felt the same. maybe that's why you didn't understand your own feelings, because if gojo acts the same as you do and calls you his friend you never questioned about if you really felt friendship towards him.

how long as satoru known all this and has kept you in the dark? what if he choose not to ever tell you? would you end up in a relationship with someone else only to break their heart when you finally realise that you're in love with satoru. your mouth is dry and you lick your lips swallowing to wet them, your voice still sounds a little hoarse though as you say, "why didn't you tell me?"

"because you'll understand and accept your own feelings and mine. i wanted to tell you but i know you, i knew that you would just deny it and ignore your feelings and it could result in something changing with us and that was the last thing i wanted sweetheart, it would kill me but i knew that it was time. i knew that you'd accept both of our feelings," he asserts and he's so close to you that you can feel his body heat.

you know what he's saying is true but you can't help but pout. "how do you know me better than myself satoru?"

satoru chuckles. well he does spend a great deal of his time loving everything you do...

"plus i couldn't keep it in any longer princess, i swear i was going mad. i would probably have folded soon and tell you," he whines and you giggle.

you take a deep breath and look at him straight in the eye, your whole body feeling fuzzy, "satoru i love you."

'yeah i know.'

gojo grins and wipes his forehead dramatically, "thank god." he holds onto the nape of your neck and pulls you to his lips so he can kiss you hungrily, as he pulls away he asks "do you still want to sleep in the spare room tonight? my room is more comfortable... and there may be some boxes on the bed that i haven't moved."

your eyes widen, "say you're joking 'toru!"

he throws his hands up and grins "well..."

you don't stay mad at him long, you've both confessed your love to each other it's not like you can be annoyed at him, you grin back, "i can't believe you."

"i swear it wasn't planned just a happy coincidence... that i chose not to tell you about... but it's okay because we can just use that room for any of your extra stuff when you move in."

you open your mouth wide in disbelief, "i cannot believe you satoru!"

"aw come on you know you love me!" he chuckles and you glare at him before be pokes your cheek and you start laughing too.

[broidobe]

𝔫𝔦𝔨𝔨𝔦 𝔰𝔦𝔵𝔵 𝔫𝔰𝔣𝔴 𝔞𝔩𝔭𝔥𝔞𝔟𝔢𝔱

requested by 📼!

⁎⁺˳✧༚motley crue masterlist

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

never shuts the fuck up

as briefly mentioned in his nsfw headcannons (linked in the motley masterlist)

practically gives a summary of everything that happens.

he’s honestly adorable

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

as also mentioned in the nsfw headcannons,

ASS GUY TILL HE DIES

absolutely OBSESSED with your ass

he likes his arms

they are big and covered in tattoos

and he LOVES his tattoos

so therefore

he loves his arms

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

okay loves cumming in you

like don’t get him wrong he does love it

but all time fav??

you guessed it

your ass

sometimes when you guys are doing missionary or anything where your on your back,

he will flip you over when he’s cumming

and cum all over your ass

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

has this fantasy of having a threesome with tommy and you

but honestly, he’d just like to watch tommy fuck you

while you make direct eye contact with him

and tell him how good his friends cock feels inside you

everytime he even sees tommy near you

he will immediately think of this

and HOPE that you’d be up for it one day

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

he’s pretty damn experienced

but that doesn’t necessarily mean he knows what he’s doing

before you he just had hookups where it didn’t matter how good he did

because it would be over and he wouldn’t need to think of it

but with you, he did

because the first time you fucked, you didn’t cum ONCE.

it WAS that bad.

so you talked it over with him and he really listened. he took mental notes and everything. he PREPARED for the next time you guys fucked

and overtime…he just got way better

f = favorite position (this goes without saying)

CHIBI

now if you haven't read the headcannons, this position is linked in it

but im gonna do my best to explain

so one partner is standing in front of the bed while the other lays down in a doggy style position. the partner on the bed has their knees right on the edge so their feet are hanging off. and they are laying with their ass up in the air.

if you didn’t understand that, PLEASE JUST CHECK THE LINK ON THE NSFW HEADCANNONS

but he gets really deep in you

and gets easy access to your ass

so it's a win

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he is pretty funny

but he does view sex as a form of connection

so he just cracks joke from here and there

but when he’s drunk..?

he takes ABSOLUTELY NOTHING seriously

and says EVERYTHING WITH A SLUR

you know what would make this even better? a tambourine... or a cowbell. just trust me on this one.

psssh, yeah, i’m totally... i’m... mumble mumble... gonna write a song about this. or, like, somethin’. you know what i mean, right?

i’m, uh, i’m like a... a rockstar... but, like, the rockstar, y’know? i’m... yeah, i’m so good at this.

you’re so hot. like, fiiiiiire. you probably have, like, a... fire extinguisher ready or somethin’.

wait, wait, i’m supposed to be... doin’ somethin’... uh... oh yeah, that’s right. come here, you!

y’know, if we were in the 80s... wait, we are... we’d be like... the best band ever... yeah, but like... in bed, too.

mmmmmm, lemme tell you somethin’, babe. the secret to a good night is… uh... whisky, definitely whisky.

i feel like i should be... doing somethin’... no, no, no—wait, i know what i should do... oh god.

no... seriously, are you... really into me? or do you just, like, wanna be part of the circus or something? i’d totally get it if you were…

this is... this is totally what... rockstars do, right? like, we... we... this is... uh... yeah, just roll with it!

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

yeah uhhh..

not the best…

they are decently long

and like a really dark brown

and they aren’t the nicest feeling ever when you give him head

but still, he’s fucking great so does it matter??

not really

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

really passionate

he really loves the emotinal aspect of sex

not just the pleasure one

he sees sex as a ritual to show someone how much they mean

he’s covers you in kisses and praise

and just constantly makes you feel like a goddess

j = jack off (masturbation headcannon)

he used to do it a lot

but not a BUNCH

because he had lots of girls

but with you?

barely ever

he’s a total sucker for mutual masterbastion though

honestly, the only times he ever jacks off is with you.

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

voyeurism and exhibitionism

but like heavy on exhibitionism

as discussed earlier, he has fantasies about watching you get fucked by his bandmates

he honestly would watch any he’s close to fuck you tbh

voyeurism is more in threesomes/gangbangs

he likes the idea of being watched during sex

especially if his actions spark envy

bondage

now it's not too light but not too heavy

he likes tying you up so you can’t move

and he doesn’t mind being tied up himself

sensory play is a big one

especially blindfolds, floggers, and wax

due to his obsession with your ass, it becomes the main culprit of wax and flogging

but c’mon you don’t mind

semi-public play

like he’ll probably finger you at a booth in the bar

in front of all his friends

or you’ll give him a blowjob under the table.

but that’s about as far as it goes

in the public eye anyways ;)

impact play

he LOVESSS when you leave scratches all over him

when he looks in the mirror next morning he gets so overwhelmed

it’s like heaven on earth to him

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

okay now fight me if you don’t see it

but i feel like he’d TOTALLY have a sex dungeon at home

with ropes, restraints, sex swings, like literally EVERYTHING

so he would absolutely LOVE to have sex in there

your bed

just comfortable and easy to just pass out in after

but he does have a thing for bathrooms

especially in bars

throwing you against the wall and pounding into you at an ungodly pace?

fuck yeah

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

honestly anything

you just being you can make him insanely horny

when you laugh at a joke he tells, he just gets a massive hard on

he’s like “omg she thinks i’m funny. I’m gonna cum now”

but when you wear some short skirt, dress, or ANYTHING that reveals that ass??

ooohhhh boyyy it will be a LONG night

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

he wouldn’t hurt your feelings

and he definitely wouldn’t make you insecure in any way

any of the…odd kinks

anything “too vanilla”

he doesn’t really like “just having sex” he likes to have a thrill to it

absolutely no life risking kinks

no gun-play or erotic asphyxiation

like he’s okay with choking but to the point where you literally can’t breathe? no way

this man has already died once, he does NOT wanna die again

and anything that doesn’t feel emotionally connected is a big NO

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

this is really a 50/50

he loves giving so so sooo much

just making you squirm in anyway is guaranteed to make him hit the roof

but he literally calls you “the goddess of head”

he cannot get enough of your blowjobs

it’s literally become a before-show ritual

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

i talked about this a bit on the nsfw headcannons but again, this is another 50/50

well actually i lied

80/20

he mostly pounds into you like a jackhammer

but any other time he takes his time and explores your body

maybe it’s after a hard day where you just feel really down

and he shows you how beautiful you really are

or maybe he’s just feeling romantic

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

they’re really only a spite of the moment thing

they only ever happen in those beloved bar bathroom breaks

or in the pre-show rituals

but he isn’t the biggest fan

he takes his time on you whenever he can

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

LOVES experimenting

he’s the type to get bored if sex stays the same

you guys totally have a kink jar that you pick out of when you wanna spice it up

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

i’d say four rounds

about…forty minutes each..?

but that’s on like a really freaky ass day

the average day is like 1-2 rounds

like i said he takes his motherfucking time

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

this is mister “i have a sex dungeon guy”

and mister “i love making you feel good” guy

OF COURSE HE OWNS TOYS

but just for you

i really can’t see him as a guy that would need them for himself

but for you??

holy shit

he has like a color-coded drawer

i kid you not.

he fucking loves using them at any given moment

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

he’s not the biggest tease

during buildup to sex he totally is

what’s with that look? you want something, don’t you? come on, say it.

what’s the rush? i like watching you squirm a little first

guess what? i’m not letting you sleep tonight. better cancel your plans tomorrow

come here. i want to hear you beg for it before i even touch you.

you look so damn good right now

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he is one loud man

he lets out these guttural moans NO MATTER WHERE THE FUCK YOU ARE

let's refer back to you giving him head under a table. with all his friends there…so y’know you’d be getting down to business and he’d be talking to his friends all normal right? and then boom mid sentence

hey, did you grab my—ahhh, Jesus Christ—grab my leather jacket from the—uhn—van?

no, I’m totally listening, just... ahhh—ahh, f**—keep talking, keep talking…

but when you guys are at home.

holy fuck he like breaks the sound barrier

oh, fuck... god, just like that— (groans deeply, his words breaking off as he grips the sheets).

you’re gonna—ahh—kill me, babe. Holy... fuck

jesus christ, you’re—uhhnn—so fucking good at this.

i can’t—fucking—ahhh, you feel... amazing.

oh, my God... yeah, just—uhn—keep going, keep going...

you’re—ahhh—gonna make me lose my goddamn mind.

fuck babe... don’t stop, please don’t—ahhh—stop.

shit, you’re—uhn—driving me insane right now.

i can’t handle—ahhh—how good you are at this.

goddamn, you’re gonna make me—uhn—lose it, babe.

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

he’s secretly into being vulnerable

nikki might seem like he’s always in control, but when he’s with someone he really trusts, he loves moments where he can let his guard down.

maybe it’s letting you take the lead, or whispering about his deepest desires in a hushed, raw voice while you’re tangled up together.

if you ever gently cup his face and look into his eyes during an intense moment, he’d melt completely. he might mutter something like:

you have no idea what you do to me...

Ii’s rare for him to let that softer side show, but when he does, it’s deeply intimate and unforgettable—proof that, for all his wild energy, there’s a tenderness underneath he only shares with someone truly special.

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

now i’m gonna make a guess and say we’ve all seen…the photos

but i should be allowed to have my own beliefs shouldn’t i?

in MY WORLD (and hopefully yours if you're reading this)

he is a beautiful 7.5 inch with a very slight curve to the right

he’s girthy

he’s got some light veins (lets pretend he didn’t inject heroin in his dick okay? okay cool. in the perfect world (daphne’s world) he does have veins left on that dick)

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

it’s pretty damn high

he gets needy too

he will call you late at night if you aren’t with him

just so you two can masturbate with each other

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

well he doesn't really shut up

so like…an hour??

but if he’s really tired like 20 minutes

he will still talk lol.

he might just pass out mid sentence

[dainedelions]

Face Claim — 양정원

009 : All too well

previous ━ masterlist ━ next

As the appeal of online dating grows, and so does the list of teenagers who partake in it, which includes Yang Jungwon. After discovering that his online girlfriend — who he had been with for a year — merely used a friend of hers as her face claim, he was faced with a conundrum as the image of that certain stranger female has already been imprinted in his mind as the woman he had been loving throughout the year.

Do read the characters' profiles for further information!

Words: 0.8k

“Please excuse me.” Ni-ki muttered politely under his breath, yet, loud enough for the students to hear as he lightly pushes them aside. He used his long legs to his advantage as he took large steps towards the individual who possesses a familiar facial feature.

It was not the well-known male whose photos blew up on Sunoo’s post that caught his eye. Rather, it was his female companion, whose face was almost all over the group chat of the 5 boys for the past year‚ the so-called online girlfriend of his Jungwon hyung

Feeling a sudden touch turning her around‚ the said female faced him with mild surprise on her expression‚ both at the disruption and Ni-ki’s intimidating height. Glancing down at his casual clothing‚ realization flashed through her eyes as she gave him a smile.

“Hi‚ you must be a freshman?” the female asked.

“Junior.” Ni-ki corrected‚ eyebrows furrowed as he stared still at the other.

“Oh! Same grade‚ silly me." she let out a small laugh‚ lightly hitting her temple with her palm. “You’re too tall to be merely a freshman. So, new student?”

The taller could only nod in response‚ his eyes not leaving the female’s facial features as various thoughts swarmed his mind.

“You must be lost? Thankfully, you approached the right person.” she said‚ her smile not faltering one bit. “I’m the student council president. Would you like me to guide you to the auditorium?”

He was in total confusion‚ receiving mixed feelings by the current situation he pulled himself in. His Sunoo hyung was right‚ she was indeed real. But why wasn't she surprised to see him? More importantly‚ why doesn’t she recognize him at all?

“Nishimura Riki.” he muttered.

“Excuse me?”

“My name. It’s Nishimura Riki.”

The female opened her mouth to respond, only to get cut off by the other male behind her.

“Ohhh, japanese! I’m Yeonjun.” he raised his fist in a fist bump while Ni-ki returned the gesture‚ slightly bowing as doing so.

“I’ll get going now.” Yeonjun gestured a salute and took a step back‚ only to get pulled by his collar as he attempted to sneak away.

“Hey, Choi Yeonjun. Where do you think you're going? We’re not done yet.” she smiled‚ eyes slightly wide in a threatening manner as she pulled him closer.

“Come on! Just this one time, please? You know‚ you’re my favorite but don’t tell the others!” the guy‚ Yeonjun‚ tried to sweet talk as he struggled on her grasp.

“No considerations for you. I kept reminding you to wear your uniform.”

“But I’m wearing-”

“Complete. Proper. Uniform.”

“Iseul!” Yeonjun pouted‚ whining incredibly loudly. Ni-ki’s eyes were quick to glance down to peak at the woman’s name tag.

Han Iseul.

“Iseul?” the japanese mumbled under his breath.

“Guys!” another voice joined in. The three looked towards a small female running towards their direction.

She lightly leaned forward as she panted and tried to catch her breath. Her palms were rested on both of her knees as she supported her weight. Her eyes were panicking‚ switching from one person to another.

Hanni Pham. That was what rested on the female's name tag‚ and Ni-ki was quick to connect the dots. He felt his hand tightening into a fist‚ scoffing in disbelief.

He was right‚ after all.

“There you are.” Iseul merely tilted her head towards the transferees direction‚ resulting in Hanni’s gaze being situated to him.

The latter hid her shaking hands in the pockets of her uniform’s blazer at the sudden feeling of her blood running cold at the sight of him. She internally panicked and spat out whatever came to her mind.

“Ah- yes! Hello, I’m Han- Han Iseul!" Hanni said‚ gaining a raised eyebrow from the other two whilst Yeonjun snickered‚ pursing his lips at her odd behavior.

“It’s almost time. Let’s get going‚ Hanni!” she added‚ pulling the taller female by her hand. Iseul simply chuckled‚ viewing Hanni’s attitude as a mere cute antic of hers.

“Well‚ Iseul...” she responded with a small smile‚ pinching Hanni’s cheek and unknowingly going ahead with her lie. “I still have to have a talk with Yeonjun. You’ll have to guide the transferee on the way to the auditorium. Would that be fine?”

She badly wanted to shake her head‚ whine‚ and throw a tantrum to get farther away from Jungwon’s friend. However‚ she could only nod her head and force a shaky smile.

“Yes- alright!”

The female did not wait for their response and started to walk‚ merely expecting Ni-ki to follow her. Their walk would’ve been a quiet one if it was not for the constant chatter of the other students occupying the hallway.

“Iseul‚ was it?” he spoke up first as he followed behind the female. He pursed his lips as he watched her head bob up and down in a nod‚ all while refusing to spare him a glance.

“Ah yes! Me and Hanni only wanted to swap-”

“Who do you think you’re fooling?”

Hanni stopped on her tracks‚ her lips slightly gaping at the loss of words. She could feel her throat going dry and blood running cold‚ making her refuse to face the Japanese male whose eyes are piercing the back of her head.

“I know your voice all too well‚ Hanni Pham.”

TAGLIST (open) : @phsmloves @yourssincerely-mimi @jwonistic @wintereals @ministrawberrywithchocolate @right-person-wrong-time @rikiiisoob @sh0dor1 @parkjjongswifey @honestlyatomicpanda @bxcndd @ayablogsblog @itrytomakesenseofitall @secretvivii @wensurr @dazzlingvurnnn

Comment below or send an ask to be added.

[burningembers91]

The Girl at the Gig - Gyeong-Su x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: Gyeong-Su loves music, but he can't sing to save his life. But you can, the girl who loves music as much as he does. The two of you follow bands around the country, but maybe with his lyrics and your voice, you could bring the house down with your own performance.

A/N: Based on this ask.

So, my thought process behind this fic was, in the TV show Gyeong-Su knew all the lyrics to Thanos' songs and he followed him around the country. So i thought, what if he was one of these people who followed multiple bands and spent all his money on gigs/concerts etc.? He's a talented musician, but can't sing and no record company wants to give him a chance. But then he meets you and sparks fly etc. etc. etc. I have a really sweet storyline planned out for him, and I'm trying to work out what kind of person Gyeong-Su would be. At the moment, I'm feeling that he'd be a bit dorky, but suuuuuper passionate, but also really nervous and sweet.

I also really struggled to find any good pictures of his character, or the actor that plays him so I've had to use his profile pic from the AsianWiki website. I couldn't even find his Instagram!

Gyeong-Su was a huge fan of music. He didn’t care what genre it was, so long as the music stirred something with him, he was a fan of that band for life. He spent every penny he earned going to gigs, from small, intimate performances, to sold out stadium shows. Everything about the atmosphere was electric, from the music, to the crowd, to the performer’s presence on stage.

Gyeong-Su longed to be a famous musician, dreamed about playing to sold out crowds across the globe. He was a talented guitar, drums and piano player, as well as a producer, DJ and songwriter, but he couldn’t sing to save his life. He’d attempted to send a few demos in to some record companies in the past, but he never heard anything back. He was convinced it was because of the way his voice sounded, like nails down a chalkboard. But he could never find anyone else to take on the vocals he wrote such passionate lyrics for.

There were a few people he met regularly at different gigs, people with the same passion for music as him. It was where he met you, the beautiful girl who was always in a band t-shirt, fighting her way to the front of the crowd. He’d never gotten up the courage to speak to you, not until one day he found himself down at the front of a Thanos gig with you. “I like your shirt,” he shouted above the music, pointing to the Thanos merchandise emblazoned across your chest. “Thanks!” you smiled back, your hips swaying in time to the music. “I made it! It’s part of my business; I make band t-shirts. Here, I’ll give you my Etsy page!”

That night, Gyeong-Su went home and scrolled through your page, buying six t-shirts. He made sure you knew it was him, leaving a little comment saying that he was the guy you met at the gigs. He didn’t have the money to buy these shirts, but he was so desperate to make a connection with you, to have something to talk about the next time you saw each other.

His order arrived a few days later, your neat handwriting on a small scrap of paper reading “Thanks for your order. Hopefully I’ll see you soon ;)”. The next gig, he wore one of your t-shirts, emblazoned with the folk artist Kim Jung Mi. “Nice shirt,” you smiled at him, pushing your way through the growing crowd. “Thanks,” he winked, “I know the girl who made it.”

You stood together the whole way through the concert, singing every word together. Your voice was amazing, a husky mezzo-soprano that made every hair on the back of his neck stand up. You were the girl he’d been looking for, the voice he needed for his music. He needed to hear you properly, needed to hear just you and the music. He made up an excuse about going to karaoke after the concert, a few of the regular gig-goers coming with you. But Gyeong-Su wasn’t interested in anyone else other than you. He insisted you sang first, listening with his mouth agape as you flawlessly performed a rendition of Dog Days are Over.

“I was wondering…” he said after your song was over, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “Have you ever considered being a singer?” “Why?” you smiled, taking a large sip of your drink. “Are you going to tell me you can make me famous? All I have to do is meet you in a remote location and you’ll make all my dreams come true?” “What? N-No!” Gyeong-Su’s face went bright red, stammering over his words as he tried to regain composure. He’d never been good with words, had never been able to articulate himself properly. That’s why he loved music so much; it did all the talking for him. “Relax,” you laughed, “I’m kidding! I’ve dabbled in a few open mic nights, but nothing serious. Why?” “It’s just… I write music. I can play the instruments, I can DJ and I can produce, but I can’t sing. I’ve been looking for someone to sing a few songs I’ve written. Would you be willing to try?” You looked him up and down, the tall, sweet boy who loved music as much as you did. You’d been looking for an opportunity to spend more time with him, and this seemed perfect. “Go on then,” you winked, “send me some of your stuff and I’ll be in touch.”

You listened to his music later that night, reading the lyrics and memorising them. Gyeong-Su had a way with words that shone through in his song writing. It made you smile that a man who could write such powerful lyrics could be so shy in person. There was so much heart in his words, so much passion and the music itself gave you the most delicious goosebumps. How about we meet on Tuesday? You texted, after only hearing two songs. I love your work.

Gyeong-Su couldn’t sleep that night, excitement bubbling away inside you. His music was his life’s work, and he’d been knocked back time and time again. But he had you now; the girl with the band t-shirts and the voice of an angel.

Tuesday couldn’t come fast enough.

[strawbrryvyy]

mlt in riize to have a s/o who is an idol??? tyy, love your writing!!

Most To Least likely in riize to date an idol

Pairings-ot7!riize x reader

Tw-nothing but in antons being female in metioned

A/n-HELLO!! loveliesss i hope you like this !it was really fun ti write so thankyou anon for requesting!also everyone LEAVE MORE REQUESTS!!! I’ll have a second one out by Thursday!!

Not edited yall, so excuse the grammar

Most

Jung Sungchan

OKOK!!!so We all know this man has been an mc, and for the first two years of his career, he wasn't the MOST active in the industry other than some content here and there and nct U.So he'd have alot of time to maybe meet some of the idols backstage especially cuz i HEAVILY believe in the tweet that he showed up early for inkigayo, and probably got to go ahead and ask some of the idols around.For that i definitely believe he is the most likely.

Park Wonbin

ok!so this man just GIVES famous couple vibes, he would most likely date an idol and be open with it!like he wouldn't care too much about what fans think because at the end if the day their still fans.If they want the couple to break up , fine that can happen in public but just know he's kissing his s/o before every performance in secret.

Lee Sohee

ok so sohee!i feel like he might start talking to an idol backstage and immediately fall HEAD over heels for them and hes thinking about them 24/7.He also REALLY likes the thrill of a secret relationship , because you never know what could happen but also the dates would be so cutee and fun tryna sneak you in like!!

Song Eunseok

ok guys for eunseok i feel like hed date like someone who isnt AS established in the industry like a smaller group ir someone from a temporary group, because he seems like someone whod love to try and get his s/o photocards and have like a whole collection without having to fight millions if people for said photocard!

Osaki Shotaro

now i had a hard time placing shotaro and eunseok but i feel like shotaro would like someone whos more behind the scenes!yknow like someone who mught be a dancer or still connected to the industry just not in THAT way like he is.someone who can relate but still can talk about different things to get his mind off of his idol life

Hong Seunghan

now the thing about seunghan is that he wants someone to remind him to take a break sometimes and like i feel like an idol might not be able to do that aswell since theyd be to preoccupied in their own career to notice

Anton Lee

now i know some people might think that he shouldve been at the top because his whole family is in the k industry some how!BUT THAT IS WHY!Like he wants his girl to be normal yknow like someone who he can relinquish all his worries to without having them deal with the same problems.like he NEEDS a normal s/o , who facetimes him and sends cute little videos and pics of smth OTHER than idol related.

Least

'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*''*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*''*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*''*•.¸♡

[thestarswillguide]

There's something that I want to shed a little light on:

"We are, all of us, stardust, held together by love for an instant."

Yes, this quote irritates a lot of us, but there's actually something really meaningful about it...

You guys remember when Aaravos was talking to Sol Regem, and he repeated the words the Stern One said to him? "Sometimes the line between cruelty and mercy can be thin."

After the last episode of s6, that made me realize something about Aaravos: he cares about what others say to him (as also shown with Terry in s7), and he keeps their words with him, recalling what they said when the current moment reminds him of it. So this...

Right here, he was smiling as he repeated the words the Merciful One said to him. This says a lot imo. Those words meant something meaningful to him, as also shown by his expression here when they said it:

So, I'm going to say it again.

"We are, all of us, stardust, held together by love for an instant."

At first, I thought they were basically saying "yeah yeah we all feel sorry for you right now"

But no, it's more. I needed chat gpt to help me with this cause I just couldn't seem to fully understand this quote, but now I do lol

The Merciful One's words were a reminder. Startouch elves are immortal, and they understand time more than any other species in TDP. When they said that "all of us" are stardust, I believe they meant every creature.

But the part I want you to think about is the rest of the sentence: "held together by love for an instant"

Stardust is scattered (atoms, nitrogen, etc.) And what I think the Merciful One was saying is that love is what keeps us whole/connected. But because of their sense of time, they're reminding Aaravos that it's fleeting; such a brief moment in the vastness of time. So, this was basically what they said:

"Every one of us is made out of stardust, and love is what keeps us whole/connected, a fleeting moment in the vastness of time."

There's either two ways to interpret what they were trying to tell him by reminding him of this fact:

1) This was the nature of things, and it was time to stop mourning...

2) For all of them, the moments experienced are brief, so focus not on how Leola's gone, but on the little time he spent with her

And that's why I believe Aaravos repeated those words: because at that moment, the focus was love.

[vanpalmerenthusiast]

need need need pre-crash/no-crash parkinglot headcanons i’m recently so getting into them

omg headcanons about us yes ofc

i feel like you can view some of these as platonic or romantic or secret third thing, so however you want to interpret be my guest <3 wasn’t really sure which version to write for so it’s mostly romantic vibe stuff

okay so we’ve all seen the “lottie was lonely, not alone” thing by now (which is a fucking amazing little analysis by @before-it-felt-like-a-sin, love it so much) and that’s something i think van tends to notice about lottie pre-crash. she understands that lottie is different than the others, because van is different too. she senses that loneliness in lottie and that forms a kind of unspoken kinship between the two, maybe even before they officially become friends. they’re connected on a level neither of them really quite understand.

bouncing off of that, van has a bit of a deeper connection to lottie in that she looks up to her terminally. she would follow her anywhere, even off a cliff if lottie said it was the right thing to do. we see this in the wilderness, but no-crash/pre-crash it’s more of just an intense loyalty than a girlfailure cult leader and her lesbiacolyte

parkinglot are like, crazy confused about each other. van knows she’s gay (lottie maybe not so much), but even then it’s like “how the fuck do i feel about this weird ass girl actually”

the gray area is SUFFOCATING

both too nervous to make an official first move so i feel like their relationship ends up stemming from a simple innocent everyday comment to them like fully going at it

lottie braids van’s hair

she does

parkinglot at the end of the day is about unconditional, devotional love. they see each others imperfections down to their core, and they just do not give a fuck because they love each other so much.

van is not the smooth one in this relationship i do indeed fear

like she has her moments but i feel like lottie catches her off-guard and gets her flustered with a random comment and lottie’s just left wondering like why did she just get so red and run away

these silly lesbians

little spoon van big spoon lottie WHO SAID THAT!!

van is ALWAYS trying to get lottie into her favorite movies and i feel like medicated lottie would be a movie fiend too so it’s not that difficult of a process

parkinglot movie nights are a staple

“it’s fine, i’ll just eat it” van and “excuse me, she asked for no pickles” lottie

this is how you do butchfemme guys, parkinglot is how you do butchfemme

i can see them connecting on their family issues at like a big slumber party while everyone else is asleep because they’re both night owls

lottie talking about her parents not wanting to deal with her, van talking about her mom not wanting to deal with anything. this conversation definitely ends with them sound asleep beside each other and sleeping in hours after everybody else.

them being the only people they can each open up to, fully.

GOD I LOVE THEM

tried thinking about them in the adult years but it got too freaky and i could not for the life of me separate them from the narrative so just put this in highschool/college no crash au

part of that was just me rambling and the rest is just the most random little things popping into my head, hope it suffices x

also, i just noticed that my list of uni headcanons you sent an ask for a while ago has just been sitting fully completed in my drafts… not sure why that happened but i will be posting it the minute after i post this!! THANK U FOR THE ASK ILY KAT 💋💋

[blainehasregrets]

What’s your view of the Blam crush?

Also you should tag your meta with character name as it’s not being seen, only by your followers.

It makes sense Blaine would find someone to project on/have a crush on in the meantime while he’s broken up with Kurt, since he’s someone who loves love (Silly Love Songs comes to mind), but he gets over it pretty fast (he could barely even think of any good parts of Sam’s personality in Tina In The Sky With Diamonds lol I also think quite a few Blamtina scenes felt very much like Blaine completely forgot he ever had a crush on Sam) with, in my opinion, little lasting effects.

I feel like, since Blaine moved on so quickly and just went back to Literally planning his wedding with Kurt like nothing, it showed being rejected by Sam didn’t foster any hurt, resentment, or regrets inside of him. He literally just did not care anymore lol Whereas I think Kurt’s crush on Finn and even interest in Sam, though brief and done after their arcs were over, continued to affect him going forward. Those events definitely furthered his communication issues and knocked down his self esteem, which in turn ended up causing problems within his relationship with Blaine.

Though I do think Kurt ultimately loved and chose to be with Blaine because it’s what he wanted, I felt he sometimes had this belief that nobody but Blaine would ever love him. Ex: Saying “I don’t think I’m ever gonna find someone else who’s going to make me feel [safe, connected, and loved like Blaine].” in Love, Love, Love. But I don’t think Blaine had that same fear?

I mean, sure, abandonment issues are the go-to thing people talk about when it comes to Blaine, but I think his abandonment issues were like. Solely focused on being abandoned by Kurt. (Note how he didn’t give a fuck about abandoning the Warblers himself…they loved him so much and worshipped the ground he walked on and yet he left them as soon as Kurt said “I want to spend every minute of everyday…with you♥️” in PPP. Blaine would take that hyperbolic statement to heart and make it his life’s mission to accomplish just that.) I don’t think he ever thought “I have no choice! Nobody but Kurt will ever love me! 😩” It was more like “I don’t CARE about anyone else, even if another person proposed to me right now, I only want KURT!!!!!” Ex: Never pursued Sebastian despite all of his flirting, literally about to throw up after he had sex with Eli (and I think it’s interesting Blaine says “I cheated on the one person I love more than anything in the world” in Dynamic Duets, like that’s his takeaway here. It’s not about feeling like Kurt is his only option, it’s that Blaine wants his only option to be Kurt, which is made more obvious with how he could and did hook up with Eli, yet doing so just made him think “wow I really only gaf about Kurt”), had a crush on straight guy Sam which would clearly go nowhere (and could be argued to just be projection and a safe way to experience a crush without it being reciprocated…), dated Dave as a power move more than anything (and this could come with its own set of 5 canon scenes to link to and explain), and does not even care to give Jeremiah a second thought in Transitioning. Though maybe blangst fans would disagree lol

And okay I got ramble-y there for a second, but that’s all to explain why I don’t think Blaine ultimately cared too much about his crush on Sam after the fact!

And while it may be classic Klainer cope, I do think the song he sang “to Sam” in Guilty Pleasures fit Kurt better!

Also thank you for reminding me! I need to organize my tags a little more in general… I went back and fixed up my last post a little (it’s still more messy than I’d like and I also want to add more specific canon scenes as evidence 😔 I’ll have to keep working on it) and tagged it! I’m so used to writing my glee thoughts on private accounts I forget other people can and want to see this stuff…

[ancha-aus]

Is it obvious I love it too?! :D Because i LOVE figuring out LORE! :D

I love that NIghtmare aparently OVERCORRECTS which is so fitting for him. The perfectionist sees what he is doing isn't working or wrong? Fine. complete 180. Lets go. No questions asked.

and true. Nightmare i sMUCH older than these guys so for him it works still. The guys eventually get used to the hovering, I bet it take sthem a while to figure out that Nightmare is PARENTING them at this point. Some crisis for the four for that. (horror is horrified to realise HE is the golden child and favourite.. Killer the absolute menace nods and says 'of course you are! You were the latest of us three so you were the baby and the baby is always the favourite.' Horror sputtering "Cross was brought in later!" Killer nods "I know but he was adopted as teenager at least." Cross decides to NOT interfer and become the target. Same for Dust.)

Okay but Horror having had the chance to truly take care of Killer? Of helping him recover because horror knows what it is like? giving horror the chance to better connect wiht killer and for them to bond instead of horrro keeping a distance to the others? it could ahve worked!

Bt i love the idea of Killer having his own thing ina way. He lost a leg but he has a prostetic that he, with the help of dust, upgraded and now there is a gun in there!! (Nightmare is horrified)

Dust and Reaper <3 they are so much fun!

okay the fact that Nightmar enad Reaper already know one another and nightmare tried to get reaper to join his forces. reaper deciding to stay neutral. Not fight against nightmare but also not fight against dream. It fits! and of course Reaper knows about nightmare and how nightmare treats his henchman. (and ouch on the first dust thing. Though i think it is cooler that they only connected with THIS dust. otherwise dust from now may think he is just a replacement for the one they ACTUALLY wanted and lost. So i think that while reaper may have spoken with all of them he really connected with this dust <3) and of course reaper goes home to his lovely wife- I mean boyfriend to talk about the new minions and how one is just very cool and honestly looks adorable and cute but strong!

Geno gently reminding reaper that nightmare doens't take care of his henchman. Reaper asking geno if they can keep him instead. please! Reaper can deliver him here! Geno stops him mostly because geno doesn't want reaper and nightmare to start a war because he does not want to know what a war between DEATH and NEGATIVITY looks like. Reaper is unhappy and mutters about totally being able to kidnape him sneakily and stuff. Geno just tries to talk it out of reapers head (we often talk about dream and nightmare being odd for being gods but REAPER is also a god. Like. The God. Like older and been there longer than either Dream or Nightmare. there is no way that reaper is normal. Sure he kinda is because he spends so much time with mortals and watching them because death but still. There is some stuff off about him. ((there is a reason reaper found it perfectly normal to keep stalking geno and intruding his space the whole time.)) )

But then as you said. the newest batch isn't dying. Reaper starts to stalk them even more and specifically dust. Dust notices but decides against mentioning it. (maybe before it was nightmare who stalked him, making sure he was okay (dust thoguht nightmare was checking to make sure he didn't make a run for it) )

And as you said. Reaper keeps stalking him. Keeps lightly interacting with him. Dust would huff and look annoyed before walking awya. reaper grows actualyl attached. Geno reminds him to not get attached to those working for nightmare but reaper isn't listening and all of his talking and the little things reaper finds out to share with geno about dust makes geno curious.

reaper keeps shooting his shot. sure dust seems angry now but geno also always used to appear angry! So maybe this is just a thing! (geno is hrorified and tries to get reaper to stop harrassing this stranger) ((Oh what a differnece between them here and in newage okay i will stop))

And dust! Dust is a smart cookie. Sure he thought it was a joke at first. a way to taunt him as dust comes clsoe to death relatively often compared to the others (or as you said just being very tired. the whole death tired thing) and reaper will tease him. Mention how he must be flriting with death, so him, to keep pushing himself this far. Dust is annoyed until he one day actually has a close call.

He straight up feels lighter and like disconnect for a moment. The whole light at the tunnel thing. And he is staring and slowly going towards it. Then Reaper distracts him. pretty much demanding his attention. and he stays. stays the whole time. long enough that his team can find him and safe him (maybe he got knocked by a full front attack from ink and launched somewhere else. somewhere stuck or something so it took time for the gang to find him. they had been so worried and finding dust just kncoked out with his HP VERY low did not help)

Dust wakes up at home- he means at the base. in the first aid room with most of him being bandaged. Everythin hurts. but he remembers what happens... and if death realyl wanted him dead... why not claim him then? especially as he hears how long they search for him and how they are thankful he managed to hold on for so long.

them after a hunt. just chilling. Dust having felt that brush of reaper's magic. knowign DAMN well that none of them moved to kill anyone and none of them are actually hurt to be a reason for reaper being there.

and dust just blurts it out "I think death/reaper has a thing for me." becuase the others TOTALLY met reaper as well, nightmare explained to them not to fight or bother reaper as he IS the god of death.

So the gang KNOWS who dust is talking about even if they don't know him personally like nightmare or dust. and OF COURSE Cross nad Killer go to snitch.

Dust is horrified and rushes after them. Don't fucking snitch to dad on him! Stop that!

Nightmare sitting Dust down and asking him what Killer and Cross meant with 'Dsuty said that death is stalking and flirtign with him!'

Dust annoyed as he mentions he didn't say that. but he explains kinda what is going on. wihtout many details because dust is a private person but also if ANYONE knows what a god could want from him and why a god would act this way towards him nightmare would know.

ngihtmare needs time to consider this but in the ends lets it go. mentions that it is fine as long as it doesn't bother or harm dust. Dust nods and goes to search for cross and killer to HUNT THEM DOWN for putting him through this.

Reaper had enough. He wants his beau and second beau to interact and he wants it now! He snatches dust and drops him right by Geno. The fact that dust doesn't even need to chew reaper out as geno does it for him. Geno going OFF about reaper being irresponsible and what if this endagers him and you don't know how nightmare will react to this!

(reaper probbaly figures that either it is fine. or nightmare will try something and reaper will jsut be near to snatch dust agian to keep him permanently! It is fine! he thought it through :D)

and Dust meets reaper and geno. Dust having to check wtih geno what the fuck this all means. geno just like "yeah he is a god. Yes we are a thing. Yes the flirting was serious. No he doens't just flirt with everyone. Yes I am fine with whatever he does."

Dust is in shock. He does not agree to ANYTYPE fof relationship for a wHILE this is weird. he needs time. but i think reaper would start snatching him more often to give the three of them a moment to interact. (geno once mentioned that he misses dust and reaper is gone and moments later he drops dust next to geno. gneo is mortified)

Reaper really just dropped his new BF off and the protective father appeared within SECONDS! Reaper is so lucky that nightmare was distracted by dust or he would have sensed reaper and reaper can see that protective parent vibe just being a thing at this point. oh boy. maybe he should ahve made a move much sooner.

Dust is very confsued about what just happened but as you said he tells it vaguely. Nightmare is VERY unhappy that reaper just snatched one of his boys and nightmare will make sure to tell him that the next time he gets (reaper does not care. he is wingmanning his mate and dust together so that he can also have dust a smate. he has PLANS!)

After a long time i think dust will agree to try dating... a tiny bit. and that is very comfrotable and he just decides to introoduce them as his boyfriends. Reaper is grinning. Nightmare is glaring MURDEROUS at reaper. the gang is amused. geno is just content to be out and about. Dust is n't sure how to feel about this moment but that is his general vibe so nothing new.

something COMPELTELY else. The post you had about the room situation.

I thinnk that after nightmare grows more attached to round four. He starts to regret the other loses more as well. Maybe he sneaks into the old rooms to search for things of all of them. to keep for himself. his own private collection. (a small wooden cat statue. Maybe a finished project or a sketch of one. A small book with notes to help with someones memory. stuff like that.)

Maybe he will offer killer a new room. saying that he should have done this from the beginning and it was unfair to not offer it to him. Killer may or may not take it. on one hand. fucking aweomse. new room that is ACTUALLY is. on the other... even if it were memories of someone elses life. it helped. because he figured out there were mutliples of him here. But all of them had been slightly different from one another. each of them had been their own person. which means that killer is also his own person and that is nice.

and then horror goes to try and get answers. Why does nightmare tell him? the truth? that ngihtmare is tired of being lonely and alone?

Idea-dumping under the cut ig as a distraction!

(Actually this got like... long, so here's some bonus design visuals!)

So, this is mostly me thinking out-loud about those alt/personal versions of Nightmare's gang.

First establishment: in this version, Nightmare follows the *was* evil but does so poorly with several versions of the group that he decides he's probably the problem and goes searching for answers before finally settling on a few and keeping them alive. (Yes, Nightmare keeps the original 3 sets dust. Most of it was scattered, but the bits he kept all went into an hourglass. He keeps it on a shelf high in his office so no one can turn it over again.)

In this same vein, Dream and Nightmare are battling because Dream believes Nightmare is no longer his younger self and an entirely separate entity. (Is this true? Probably this time? We'll see.) So, Dream has Ink usually on-hand, and has lost a few comrades over the years, Blue being the only one who'd survived to this point. (I think he might've managed to recruit a Color at some point, Night killed both the Color and Killer. Maybe he also recruited a horror of his own, who was executed by the 2nd Dust. Point is, Blue has been around to see these monsters be cycled out and behave different and all die expendable on Night's side, and has lost friends on Dream's side.) Dream nowadays tries to stick to only himself, Ink, and Blue.

So, establishing that, there's the trouble of Nightmare and his mortals.

Nightmare lives in an older Victorian mansion rather than a castle, his domain is an abandoned au set in that time period, where him and his crew have free-reign. (Basically think the streets of London but entirely unoccupied and almost constantly night-time or rainy/dreary/foggy.)

Initially, he used this landscape to torment those he brought to his domain, whether that be chasing a new killer/horror/dust until they were exhausted or bringing au inhabitants back for his men to hunt down and torment for him. It was useful, a lot of left-over objects and items from inhabitants long since dead, and a lot of interesting hiding places. The edges of the au are just a blackness. Eventually there is an invisible wall, and if you reach that, You're easy pickings for Nightmare. he knows.

I think that the way Nightmare finally decides on his henchmen needing better treatment is when the 3rd Horror, the very last surviving one, *let* Dream get a lethal hit in on him. There was no chance for Dream or Nightmare to act, and they'd both retreated in the aftermath. Normally this wouldn't have bothered Nightmare, but that Horror had been his most obedient and resourceful one yet, and he'd actually grown to like his presence. So. The silence in the castle while he recovered from injuries and prepared for the next batch? It was particularly striking for him. It felt *icky* to not have another person there, and it felt icky to have lost that Horror in the way that he had. Not even an honorable death. He decided he needed to figure out how to keep a monster similar, if not *better than* how he'd kept horror.

After about a month of debating, he finally settled on visiting a Ccino. And no, this isn't just because Ccino's been growing on me lately. He knew one of the Killer's he had, the 2nd, enjoyed sneaking off to the fluffytale aus and he figured there must have been a reason. So. Nightmare takes advantage of his shape-shifting and what little sense he has, and finds himself in an inaccurate replication of a passive Nightmare. He goes to a Ccino, though it might as well be one involved in the multiverse, since Night is now shattering that view. He makes several trips, regularly over the course of a few months. Biding his time. The balance isn't tipping yet. Until he can become at least slightly familiar enough with this Ccino to ask the burning question. How does one care for another living being?

Ccino, at this point, is used to his weird British customer and his odd way of asking questions. Asks if he means a pet, like a cat. Nightmare clarifies that, no, he means monsters. And Ccino has to try and figure out what he means by that. Is he expecting? Is he... adopting? He asks the second one, and Nightmare nods. Ccino breathes a sigh of relief, and realizes it must be because Nightmare is a boss monster. They live much different lives from a normal monster, require less to eat, less sleep, rely on their magic a lot more heavily. He suggests Nightmare come by again the next day and by then he might have some advice.

And while Ccino mostly gives him information on how to raise kids, from babies to teens, Nightmare takes in the information. He's still convinced he's learning all this because he wants to make perfect soldiers. Monsters who will obey him through whatever means that last Horror had. So he takes in all the information he can. He focuses a lot on the suggestions for teenagers. Even though the ones he had before were certainly adults, they often had outbursts and these solutions seemed reasonable. And Ccino was kind enough to stay after closing to talk with him on multiple occasions. It became a little club, between the two of them, almost.

And then Nightmare finally went out to find new replacements. 4th time's the charm.

The first one he collected this time was a Killer. The most volatile usually, but also the easiest to coerce into cooperating with his goals. Normally, his first act would be to let the Killer run loose in the streets and hunt him down. A show of dominance and control. This time, he decided he'd show patience. He stole away the Killer like he normally would, and left him out on a street, but with a note in his pocket. Detailing exactly what Nightmare was offering and why, along with the address of the mansion incase he wanted to discuss more.

It only took two days before Killer arrived at Nightmare's doorstep. He was cautious, but Nightmare was cordial. Not subtle, no, he acknowledged that he was actively kidnapping him. That if he made a misstep Nightmare would kill him. That he was replaceable. But, he also explained exactly what he was looking for from Killer, and *offered* work to him. Killer wandered away for a few more days, before coming back and accepting.

The trial runs with Killer were rough the first few months. Nightmare visited Ccino less, and found himself trying very hard to balance authority, Killer's loyalty, and the fragile trust growing between them. Sometimes he'd catch Killer doing something and he'd physically refrain from lashing out and punishing. Other times, though strangely only when Killer was making choices poor for his own health, Nightmare lashed out. Corrective behavior was not kind, but it was for the best in Nightmare's mind.

One thing he had a lot of trouble with was letting Killer explore the domain. He used to restrict all his henchmen inside unless they were hunting or on missions. Killer had an insatiable urge to explore, and several times Nightmare saw it as escape attempts. Dragging Killer back inside with threats of retaliation. Only once he let Killer escape and *watch* what he did, he realized he was literally just looking around, picking up trinkets, once he stole a shirt and brought it back with him. Then he returned, willingly, to the mansion. It was no trick, no escape, just simple curiosity. Nightmare took a page out of the book of the advice from Ccino and actually complimented Killer's shirt when he finally wore it one day. Killer's hackles were raised about it, obviously afraid of punishment, but Nightmare waved it off. As long as he wasn't bringing harm to himself or running away, Nightmare didn't mind.

It was only after Killer proved himself capable of hunting down captives in the city maze that Nightmare went out to find another. The 4th Dust.

Dust was a bit more of a handful than usual. Maybe it was because Nightmare wasn't stern enough. Or maybe it was because this Killer was a lot more friendly than his others had been. This Dust immediately attacked. Instead of aiming at Nightmare, it was aimed at Killer. Normally, it the past, he would've let Killer get hurt. Learn a lesson. This time he tugged his Killer out of the line of fire and forced Dust to listen to him. Held him in place.

Dust did not wander into the city like Night had let Killer do. He was confined to the mansion, mainly because Nightmare knew the previous Dusts had a tendency to curl up and let themselves rot if given the chance. So, Nightmare made sure he was fed, and would dunk him in the pond if he refused to bathe, and was always on the watch for hostile attacks, all while Killer was usually playing antagonist.

Nightmare's actually not sure what it was, but one day Dust simply... stopped disobeying his orders. He was up for breakfast, and didn't make Nightmare drag him out to see Killer chase down a victim. Nightmare did his best to be genuine when he told Dust he was pleased to see him up and about.

(Killer had been part of the change in attitude. He would sit outside Dust's door when Night was out and tell him how good of a gig it was. Nightmare wasn't perfect, but the place was cool and it was better than an empty underground. Killer was right, it was better than an empty underground. He gave it a shot and found he didn't feel awful.)

Dust still had his days ofc. Days where he'd get overwhelmed during a mission and overwhelm his magic. Days where he'd be too exhausted or depressed to get out of bed. Days where he hated being there and wanted to go back to his old au. But, on those days Nightmare would check in on him verbally, and visit with meals, or a small gift, or answer a question. Dust liked it when Nightmare answered his questions. And Nightmare, sometimes, would twitch his tendrils and throw something around when Dust was out of commission... but never infront of him. In front of Killer? Yes. Infront of Dust? No. That was not for Dust to worry about.

Sometime after Dust warmed up to him, he resolved to let them visit Ccino. Ccino had been asking about how things were going, and Nightmare wasn't sure how to express the extent of his frustrations a lot of the time. Ccino had suggested a visit might help if they were antsy. Nightmare had agreed.

After a particularly hard day, Nightmare having run into Dream, Blue, and Ink while on a supply run with the two he had, he decided they deserved a break. He prefaced that they were not to torment. Not to harm. Not to do any damages or there would be consequences. When both had agreed, thinly veiled curiosity, Nightmare took them to the au. Just around closing time. He adopted his shapeshifted passive form and brought the two of them along.

Ccino has been... visibly shocked. These were obviously two full-grown, or at least in they 20s-30s, monsters. They didn't look like they were in the best states either. But he'd held himself strong as Nightmare guided them to sit at his and Ccino's usual rounded table, the two extra chairs now being used up. Nightmare handed them the menu, and it seemed he got hesitant orders from both of them before approaching Ccino at the counter. He ordered. Ccino got to work.

When the drinks were brought out, Ccino was almost pleasantly relieved to find that the two additional monsters had cats swarming them. Nightmare introduced them, and Ccino saw how Killer had one cat cradled in each arm, both purring up a storm. Dust had one in his lap, asleep, with one of his hoodie-strings trapped by the cat's jaws. Night didn't bother with a made-up story. Just vaguely explained that they had come from toxic and unhealthy environments and were staying with him for the time being. Like... roommates. Ccino just kinda has to accept that the other two don't seem to be in any immediate distress and minds his own business.

I think it'd be at least a year or two, Nightmare ensuring he's made Killer and Dust comfortable and loyal. Making sure he knows just how to keep them alive properly, and establishing silently to his enemies (the stars) that he's done using expendable pawns. That's when he finally collects the 4th Horror.

It was a hard choice for him. Something about seeing another Horror's face, especially after he'd finally been making an effort to provide better support and care to this Killer and Dust? He figured it out. His last Horror was only so obedient and relaxed because if he was, Nightmare went softer on the others. When the others were both gone, he lost hope. Nightmare, some part of him, was scared he'd do it all over again. Somehow lose Killer and Dust and be left with just Horror. That was why he focused so heavily on Killer and Dust's wellbeing this time. So this Horror wouldn't have to worry. Would turn out the same.

And the plan worked out. Nightmare brought himself to go find a Horror. One from a collapsing timeline, right in the cross heirs of Error's attacks. He was basically a scrap of code, and Nightmare tugged him to safety at the last second. This Horror was confused, but grateful, until he noticed Killer and Dust. Horror was entirely avoidant of the two for the longest time, willing to do as Nightmare said once he heard him out, saw what was happening, but he did NOT like Dust or Killer. He was cagey, kept to himself, only showing weakness if he was injured in battle or had fallen ill. Night tried to watch out for him, but that wedge between the three of them was troublesome. Night hoped it'd work itself out. It never quite did.

Night doesn't have a favorite. He'll refer to Killer for important tasks, he's been there the longest. He'll let Dust fall asleep on the couch near to him and curl tendrils around him while he haps. He'll find recipe books and new supplies from aus for Horror to try out. He'd willingly get in the way of any attack to improve their chances of survival. Having said this, he pays an extra attention to Horror. Everyone notices it, Horror finds it unsettling sometimes but can mostly ignore it. It isn't until a fight with Dream where Horror chases Ink off to the side and Ink reveals to him the fate of the last Horror that any of them know *why*. Horror takes time to process it, before bringing it up to Nightmare very very nervously.

Nightmare, pained, admits his previous faults. He's not proud of his methodologies back then. He doesn't admit how much he cares about this 4th round of them. He doesn't need to.

Fun bonus! There's a year where Cross comes into the picture. At first he seeks out Nightmare for his help. Like in Underverse, he wants to rebuilt his au. But Nightmare denies him. It wouldn't benefit him or the others, it wouldn't benefit the balance, find someone else. But Cross can't. When he tries to work alone, Cross finds that Dream and the stars intercept him. They assume he'd working for Nightmare, which he denies, and they try to talk with him. Ask what he's doing. Ink and Dream can't allow Cross to keep going, even if he's trying to make himself a new home. They ask if he wants to join them. Defend against evil in the multiverse. And as it is, he has to agree.

So Cross teams up with the stars for a while. But as he's working with them, things don't seem to be lining up. Dream claims Nightmare tortures his followers, trades them out like cheap toys. But... Cross never sees these ones change. And if one gets too injured, Nightmare calls a retreat. The same ones come back each time. Even in the midst of battle Nightmare seemed to keep tabs on all of his players.

Once, Cross isolated Dust from the rest of the fighting. He was wounded and clearly getting more exhausted by the second. When Cross pinned him finally, he asked if he wanted to stop fighting. To go somewhere safe. Away from Nightmare. Dust had always seemed like the most actively dis-engaged fighter of the three. Cross thought he could convince him. But Dust just stares at him and says "Nah." Before getting a second wind and summoning an attack again. Cross tried to knock him out, take him by force, but the hit just dazed him rather than knocking him out, and by then Nightmare had figured out where they were. Seeing, or sensing, Dust's state, he signals for retreat instantly. Cross is forced to move or get skewered by darkness, and he's shocked by how gently Nightmare scoops up the dazed Dust, and how willingly Dust let's it happen. Horror and Killer are right on Nightmare's tail and hop through the portal first. Night through very last.

Cross had never seen Nightmare pick up his men so carefully before. Usually they'd walk through on their own, or he'd lift with tendrils. This time he carried Dust in his own arms. That was... weird.

Cross, eventually, comes to terms with not rebuilding his AU, just being barred from it for so long. But it takes *ages* before he goes to Nightmare. For one reason or another, Cross realizes that the state of his friendship with Dream is unhealthy. I mean, Dream cares for him, but it feels overbearing. And when he asked to visit the omega timeline once, Dream advised against it. Basically placed him on house-arrest unless everyone was going out to fight. He had to stay inside Dream's au, since he was an outcode. A fragile one. (Dream was afraid of losing Cross, like he'd lost many others.)

During a fight, Cross decides he's going to try something new. He's going to get as close as physically possible to the portal at the end of the fight, and lunge inside at the last second. No weapons, no hostility, nothing. That Domain of Nightmare's is untraceable. He needs in there.

And when he enacts the plan? Nightmare actually allows it. On his end, acting like he didn't notice a thing until he steps through.

Ofc, Cross immediately got tackled and pinned by Killer, but Cross doesn't fight back. Night demands he explain himself, abd Cross takes one more hesitant look at the surrounding enemies before admitting. Dream's kept him on a short leash since he joined. No exploring, no harsh training, no visiting friends, nothing. He needed to get somewhere Dream couldn't follow him. Even though it was a suicide mission, Night's domain was the safest choice.

And Nightmare was frankly baffled. Someone had willingly chose his domain over his brother's? It was a bit of an honor. But I'm the sane breath, he couldn't just let Cross leave. If he did, then that wouldn't be just to his three loyal wards.

So, Nightmare gave him an ultimatum. Either he stayed and acted as a teammate, eventually earning privileges just like the others had, or they could kill him. No one can just freely enter the au and expect Sanctuary. Cross knew as much, and as much as it seemed to pain him, he agreed he'd work for Nightmare.

And for Cross? Nightmare decided to reach back into the old days. He told Cross he had ten minutes to go somewhere in the city. Evade for as long as he could. Told him to get running. Only when Cross had confusedly left the mansion did Nightmare tell the group that whoever could scare Cross the most, without intentionally wounding him, would get to choose the next big leisure item he brought back from supply-running.

Boy did the guys torment him! Nightmare kept an eye on it, and there was some excellent restraint from all three of them. It went on for several hours, and Nightmare only cut it short because he'd noticed Cross had developed a limp. Some sort of twisted ankle maybe? (For the record, Dust managed to win. He suggested a projector for movies and stuff.) Back at the castle they all sat at the table, including Cross (though he was wary) and ate. Then they had leisure time. Then curfew. The next morning, when Cross was still limping, he postponed further 'training' to check how truly hurt Cross was.

Basically, Cross figures out Nightmare only does fucked-up stuff because it's part of his nature. He needs to to survive. Outside of that? He's learned to be amicable and borderline kind to those he cares about. Cross is there to witness Killer getting his first cat, he's there to witness the three of them get into intense debates about high-level science and scribble all over a whiteboard, he's there to witness a lot of good moments. Including Nightmare bringing a Ccino for a visit to the house.

This Ccino visit is prompted by him noticing the boys haven't been by with Night lately. Nightmare assures him that they're fine, but also suggests Ccino could come by for a visit? And Ccino, friendly and optimistic Ccino, agrees. Nightmare, upon portalling them, walks a bit with Ccino. Explaining the nature of the realm and why he lives there. Ccino listens and accepts it, even if he is a little spooked. Nightmare then guides him to the mansion and shows him around. The guys are all screwing around in the kitchen, trying to make cookies with Horror. The three are excited to see Ccino and greet him. Cross, who was sitting in the corner trying nit to make things worse with the batter, was confused to find a normal Ccino visiting the domain. A part of him was angry, another was hurt, but he kept quiet. The Ccino was nice and greeted the others, then introduced himself to Cross. Cross did the same.

Ccino, at this point, officially became knowledgeable of the multiverse and unintentionally/intentionally aligned himself with Nightmare. Night seemed to be doing very well despite all the worries he'd had, and also, Ccino considers Night to be a friend. They discuss books together, play newspaper games, etc etc.

After Ccino leaves he starts getting more multiversal visitors, he can always tell, but he has his favorites.

...

Hard cut, day 2 of adding to this ramble post and now I have drawn designs with extra lore!!

Nightmare and Dream's magic from the apple incident has condensed around their skulls like halos! They can't be touched nir damaged by attacks, but they do glow when either is feeding/exerting their magic.

Nightmare did his best to keep the 4th round of the mtt in top shape, but it wouldn't last forever. Dust was the first one to get a major injury, though it wasn't very prominent visually. Shortly after they got Horror, Dust was slashed in the socket by one of Ink's corrosive paints. He fought through the pain, but upon getting back to the base, Nightmare discovered Dust's state. Nightmare's first instinct was to clean the wound like he'd been taught by Ccino, then to ask if Dust could still use the magic in that eye. As it stands, he still can't reconnect to the mana there. Night fought against every instinct telling him that Dust was broken, and to get a new one, and just told him to go rest and recover. Dust has a scar on his bone and his eyelight is missing in that socket. But he's alive, which is a testament to Nightmare's improvement.

Killer lost his leg shortly after they took in Cross. It was a combative fight where Dream wouldn't let up, hunting them down to any au they moved to, not allowing them to make the supply run they'd been on (it was after a period of quiet after Cross ran and was taken in by Night. Dream + the others believe Nightmare killed him.). It was Blue who almost got a solid hit in on Dust, but Killer got in the way to block. Only, he wasn't sturdy enough and his leg-bone practically shattered when he tried to stop Blue's swing. Horror scooped Killer up, and in the wave of negativity and Dust's cursing that followed, Nightmare signaled a retreat.

Under normal circumstances, such a substantial, mobility-altering, injury would prompt Nightmare to just put a follower out of their misery and claim a new one. But. Not anymore. He had to act fast because Killer was fading in consciousness abd Nightmare was never one for major wounds like limb loss. Luckily, Horror was familiar, and him and Night managed to stop Killer's limb from dusting any further up his body. (Dust was furious with Killer for taking that hit. Horror was shocked. Nightmare regretted not taking up the rear in the first place. Cross was mortified to see Killer in such a state and was 1000% sure Night was going to off him.)

Recovery for Killer was... rocky. About 50/50 good/bad days, but he pulled through and learned to use a prosthetic. In the meantime, Cross offered to cover for Killer on runs if he was needed, a good step for Cross and for Nightmare. But, instead, Nightmare asked Cross to focus on making sure Killer didn't hurt himself while the others were out on runs. He couldn't risk revealing Cross' being alive just yet. This leads to plenty of Killer Cross bonding time, and Killer gets to tell all sorts of stories about how much the Boss has been improving. Killer knows he was the pet project, the test dummy to this 'new him'. Nightmare hasn't laid much of a finger on Horror, abd only let them spook Cross, while Killer was tossed around like a ragdoll. And now look! Night was going through the trouble of replacing his limb and nursing him back to health! For Killer it's like watching someone take their first steps. Cross realizes then that Nightmare hasn't always been like this. He used to be worse. He's taking steps on his own to improve. And for what? The sakes of Killer, Dust, and Horror?

Meanwhile, Dream has Blue and Ink, both of whom he extends his positive magic to. Even when they're in their own domains, they can spread his aura to those they interact with and call upon his power.

Unlike those two, he's also allied with Outer and Lust! Those two are from the omega timeline, and they work to help anyone fleeing from destroyed, corrupted, or otherwise uninhabitable aus. They had their own little thing going before Dream entered the picture, but when he approached them about seeing anyone from a destroyed au, they kept in contact. Now they act as a little home-base, keeping track of the battles and the conflicts and making sure the main three fighters don't work themselves into the ground. And! Because the main 3 are always out and about? If you need help with smaller tasks, Lust and Outer are on it. Lust finds it a nice distraction from his past and anxieties, and Outer does it as repayment to Dream (who saved his life from the 3rd Killer once).

Uhhh, one last note I think? Horror is the favorite child from an outsider + inside pov. Night doesn't think that way, but he is actively more careful with Horror than the others. He feels like he failed the last one (he failed all of them but y'know) and he can fix it with this one. This one doesn't understand the treatment and often resents it, but decides not to say anything lest he offset whatever kindness Nightmare is doing for the others. The others don't mind that Horror is effectively the favorite. They know Nightmare was fucked up long before they arrived, and it was just one of his many quirks.

[ratslutuncontained]

by the way it's SO cool finally letting myself be attracted to and fuck men

[contagious-watermelon]

Why do I keep seeing transmascs and trans men insisting or implying that all trans men are "female socialized," or "understand the female experience," or "navigated the world as a woman." Because yeah, sure, that can be true for some people. especially if you weren't gnc at all as a kid and didn't crack your egg until well into adulthood, it makes sense.

But they don't stop at saying they had that experience. It always comes with an addendum that trans men, as a group, all can relate to this experience. I don't know about the entirety of my demographic, but I never got even a little bit of what some of them talk about. I didn't even believe that women were scared of going out at night until I kept consistently seeing them say it, online or wherever, for years. I never realized catcalling was a thing until I saw some women complaining about it on reddit.

But they posit it as some sort of, you're safer than cis men, right? You know what it's like? Which, on top of being patently, demonstrably false in the case of myself and many other trans men, holds some unpleasant and often outright hostile implications about trans women. And they always deny it, but if you can't even conceptualize someone like me who grew up gnc, and never got the bulk (or any?) of whatever we consider to be 'female socialization,' what does that say about what you think trans girls went through, growing up? I don't want to speak for them, as I've never experienced that firsthand, but I can guarantee that (if you're even a little bit obviously trans) people don't treat you like a cis kid of the opposite gender. By and large, they don't get treated like cis boys.

It just makes me mad that we're taking this inaccurate framework that (ever so conveniently) puts trans people into the box of our assumed birth gender, and trying to fancy it up and use it with a faux-progressive veneer; never mind the way that transphobes use it to bar trans women from being athletes, or using the bathroom, or having access to any gendered resources they need. It would be bad enough to try and dust it off and use it even if it were largely accurate, due to the aforementioned connections to outright transphobia, but it literally is patently false. Not in all cases, obviously, but why are we trying to revamp this untrue, inaccurate generalization and pretend that we can make it 'trans-inclusive?'

[blue-eli]

Ink October day 11: Firebreak

A strip of land that has been cleared, plowed, or planted with fire-resistant vegetation to prevent a fire from spreading.

[cementcornfield]

I just told [Tee] we stuck for life now....all i said was 'we locked in for life'...we gonna be on trips the offseason now, he gonna see me on the regular.

[geraskierfanficprompts]

When Jaskier's angry or upset, it's always "Don't touch me!" "Get away!" "Hands off!" And then the bard will be gone for hours or days until he calms down.

Now, Geralt understands this kind of reaction. He himself doesn't want to talk to/be around others when he's angry. Much less let anyone touch him. The thing is...Jaskier acting that way never fails to make Geralt feel like shit. Jaskier is usually so affectionate that the sudden cut off is jarring. The first few times it happened, Geralt had been sure that Jaskier was fed up with him and leaving for good.

However, Jaskier always returns. They make amends, and the bard resumes his touchy, affectionate ways.

One day though, they have their worst argument yet. And although he had always come back before, Geralt is certain that this is the time Jaskier will leave forever. If Jaskier walks out that door, Geralt is sure he will never see him again.

So, unthinkingly, Geralt catches the bard's wrist.

Jaskier's eyes widen, panic replaces anger. "Geralt! Let me go! Let me go right now!"

Geralt loosens his grip reflexively in response to Jaskier's panic. Did the bard think the witcher would force him to stay?

He opens his mouth to try to explain.

Only, the world is...spinning? And Geralt's tongue is heavy. And everything is warm. Oh, he feels like he’s going to hurl.

Then, he passes out.

An unknown amount of time later, Geralt wakes. He feels kind of hungover but is otherwise fine. To his relief, Jaskier is sitting at his bedside.

When the bard notices Geralt is awake, he inquires after his health. At Geralt's reassurance that he is fine, Jaskier launched into a tirade about the number of times he had told Geralt "NOT TO TOUCH ME WHEN I’M MAD! AND THAT INCLUDES RIGHT NOW, YOU SCARED ME HALF TO DEATH, YOU BASTARD!!!"

Geralt is a bit confused about how Jaskier being mad and his fainting spell are connected.

Two things are revealed:

1) Jaskier is part fae.

2) Some fae become toxic to touch when they are angry or upset. It is a magical trait, so it fades when the anger does. However, it can still be deadly.

This puts some things into perspective. Like how Jaskier, who seems to feel entitled to his emotions/reactions no matter how inappropriate they may be, is very skilled at cooling his temper. Or how, when he does become angry, he chooses verbal slander over physical violence. Or how when there IS a physical fight Jaskier wraps his hands in cloth and tries to use blunt instruments.

Bonus: Geralt tells all of the witchers not to touch Jaskier when he's mad, and Lambert takes that as a challenge.

I LOVE THIS!!!!!! OH MY GOODDDDDD!!! You take the things we spoke about and add onto it like putting glitter on a macaroni art craft, it's beautiful, It's so beautiful, oh my god! Poor Geralt thought his bard was leaving and poor Jaskier has to watch his stupid idiot Witcher touch him, gAH I love it! I want to read a 5k oneshot about it

[camellcat]

I love spuffy as much as the next guy but ohhh my gawddd I really kinda wish it had been buffy wil and xand to finish the fight. they started it together, and while they've always had outside help, I just think it would've been so good if each of them had their own big important parts to play since this was the last we get to see of them