#and so when they meet it’s like that Spider-Man meme

[meteors-lotr]

Just remembered that in the canon of my au Tilda and Denethor have met. Not only that, but Tilda has called him a ‘stupid cunt bitch’, and just generally cursed him out.

So I can imagine that conversation was fun, Tilda mentioning that she’d met the previous steward of Gondor and that he’d been a cunt, and Boromir saying like “yeah that was my dad” and Tilda spitting out her water

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

Sophie Oliveira-Shepard Alenko-Oliveira and Kaidan Alenko-Oliveira - ME3 (3/?) "What would I do without you?" "You'll never have to find out." Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)

[aliyahwritings]

INTRODUCTION TO LOSER!READER

loser!reader has school validation issues, she constantly seeks love through grades/scores. she is very empathetic and sensitive to things around her. she has the most beautiful soft long skirts outfits and nails sets (my girl does them herself). she can't do anything without having her grey headphones with stickers on it. oh, have you noticed how she's DIY based? yep.

loser!reader who is obsessed with spider-man and constantly looks him up without knowing it's actually peter parker from science class. she will never admit this but she is attracted to him (spidey) physically and personality wise. she thinks the way he teases officers and is cocky makes him so sexy. she loves video games like resident evil, the last of us and until dawn. she absolutely love playing them to cool down.

loser!reader who's loved by everyone because of how sweet she is for helping those in needs when it comes to homework and tests; she won't give the answers but she'll help.

loser!reader who was raised by her single dad because her mother started a new life with her new boyfriend. she is very happy with her father and wouldn't have it any other way. her father always encourages and teases her to meet new people and "finally" get a boyfriend or girlfriend. she is pansexual.

loser!reader who has nerdy conversations with peter about books and superheroes. she always posts herself with peter on her instagram because she loves showing him off. her signature is definitely long skirts and her curly hair. the people in her classes always admire the way her hair is constantly styled in a different, cute way.

loser!reader is sending a hundred memes to peter in a day and he always answers. he thinks it's adorable how she sends things that remind her of them, him, or just things that made her laugh. he swings her across queens just to have her close to him and panic (mf thinks it's funny).

loser!reader IS A FUN LOSER!!!!! SHE LOVES TO BANTER AND MAKE SNARKY COMMENTS TO HER FRIENDS AND BOYFRIEND!!!!!!!

layout credit to the beautiful @rafecameroninterlude (if u want me to take this down, i understand)

i'll be writing college era peter and reader because ain't no way i'm writing a 15 year old peter... #weird #notintothat #fuckthemkids

[op-sys-chaos]

@stealingyourbones mentioned in a post I just saw that Booster Gold could be used in a DPxDC fic related to Clockwork bc they’re both invoked in time travel stuff and omg yES I have ideas now

Feel free to use any/all of these, just tag me!

1. Booster Gold being in the present is good for the timeline, but he wants to go back to the future. Clockwork sends Danny to sabotage the time machine. Shenanigans ensue. The JL thinks Danny’s a villain until a massive attack happens, Booster Gold is very much crucial to saving the day, and afterwards Danny shows up with a perfectly intact time machine (he fixed all the damages he caused while they were fighting the villain) and goes “ok now you can go home! :)” and the JL is so confused. Dealer’s choice if they get an explanation and maybe even ask Phantom to join the JL or if Danny just vanishes, never to be seen again

2. Booster Gold wants to change something in the timeline. Clockwork needs it to stay the same. Danny and BG go back and forth trapping each other in various situations (maybe it’s comedic what they end up trapped in) until one of them gives up

3. BG and Danny actually know each other in the future. Knowing how OP Danny is and knowing he’s an active hero rn, BG keeps trying to get the JL to recruit Phantom. The JL keeps refusing (“that’s a KID Booster we can’t put a kid in the JL”) until like Vortex or someone shows up and wreaks havoc and the JL is floundering and barley hanging in there and Danny shows up and beats him in like two seconds flat. The JL just kinda goes “ok, maybe Booster had a point”

4. BG, being a time cop, and Danny, being Clockwork’s personal equivalent of a time cop, keep running into each other in various situations (usually bc Clockwork sends Danny to help BG whenever he’s in over his head). But they keep meeting out of order, not even realizing that Danny’s from the time BG ends up staying in until they run into each other on a normal, non-time related mission. Spider-man meme pointing at each other, “what are YOU doing here???”, “is there some time-related issue on top of this?”, JL confused why Booster and a random overpowered teen they just met today seem to know each other. (Their meeting in their normal time is after all the meeting out of order shenanigans. After that point, they stay together for time missions that Clockwork sends Danny to join BG on; he makes sure they meet in the right order this time.)

5. Booster and Clockwork hate each other. Danny is a big fan of BG. Shenanigans ensue

6. Danny and BG hate each other. Clockwork needs them to get along for the sake of the timeline. He keeps sending Danny to BG’s time cop missions. Will they ever make up?

7. Danny and BG are the same age and start dating. Clockwork sends them on fancy fun time travel dates

8. BG keeps running into this random kid in various places in the time stream. He only ever tells BG that “Clockwork sent me” and BG is getting more and more determined to find whoever Clockwork is and kick his ass for putting this poor precious kid in harm’s way. Hell, BG might just end up adopting this poor kid himself if that’s what it takes to save him… which is exactly what Clockwork wants

9. BG is incredibly surprised when his time mentor, Clockwork, reaches out and asks him to adopt a kid, Danny

10. BG and Clockwork are dating. Clockwork asks BG if he’s okay with adopting Danny

I can come up with more if y’all want! Please tag me if you use these I wanna see what you create :)

[oopsiedaisiesbaby]

Imagine with me for a moment…

Steve and Billy who have yet to meet but both just separately moved to a new city with their besties Heather and Robin. They are both hopeless in the kitchen so Robin and Heather sign them up for a couples cooking class so that they can be there for support.

Except somehow the universe aligns that both Robin and Heather fall sick on the night of the cooking class (or maybe they’ve met in the background somewhere and it’s the only night they can coordinate a first date). Both girls insist that the boys have to go though to make sure they can cook at least one decent meal.

So Billy and Steve show up alone and the instructor is like, “perfect, you’re a couple now.” They can both appreciate that the other is attractive but don’t think much of it because they’re both so focused on not burning down this nice lady’s place of work.

However, Steve starts a bit where he’s acting like Billy is actually his husband and rather than roll his eyes and laugh before moving on, like Steve expects, Billy ‘yes and’s him and starts calling him his wife. There’s wine that will be used in the recipe but they start drinking it as they’re cooking and chaos ensues.

They’re coming up with whole elaborate back stories that are wildly ridiculous. Steve saved Billy from breaking his neck while rescuing a kitten from a tree that was on fire before Billy heroically saved the cat and Steve because when Steve saved Billy he slipped on a piece of ice and Billy caught him while holding onto the kitten type of silly.

It’s confusing the hell out of the rest of the couples who don’t know they’re not actually a couple. But, they’re getting drunker and drunker and increasingly ridiculous and definitely making the dinner inedible, but they’re making each other laugh so hard that Billy is crying and Steve starts wheezing about peeing his pants while they’re falling all over each other.

They get kicked out.

Needless to say, they get an uber back to Steve’s place where they continue their bit about being married with the Uber driver. However, they’re pressed together and the giggles start dying down and the tension starts building until they reach the elevator and Billy is shoving Steve up against the railing in the elevator and pressing the emergency stop button and they grind it out right there.

They stumble into Steve’s apartment, giggling again, and stop short when they see Robin and Heather making out half naked on the couch. It’s the Spider-Man pointing meme because:

“You said you were sick Heather, why are you naked on my wife’s couch???”

and

“Why are there cum stains in your pants Steve, you were supposed to be cooking???”

Then Steve laughs so hard he actually chokes himself a little bit and then everyone decides they’re all a little too drunk and to call it a night and have a sleepover. Billy and Steve have the best nights sleep they’ve ever had cuddled up together, obviously. And they never do learn how to cook but they do get engaged and married in under a year.

[soobnny]

classmate au | park jay

❝ come with me to the canteen, i’ll pay for whatever you want ❞

heeseung | JAY | jake | sunghoon | sunoo | jungwon | ni-ki

honestly, jay usually just keeps to himself

sooooooo campus crush.

someone play message in a bottle by taylor swift

he only goes crazy when he’s with his friends but like tbh i don’t see him going around and socializing in the classroom 😭

he usually waits for his classmates to come to him ykwim

he’s also def a morning person

arrives to school like a whole HOUR before class starts

his parents probably drive him to school and drop him off on the way to work

he’ll just be sitting in his seat in the middle

minding his own business .. doing last minute homework .. on his phone

jay is annoying bc he’s the natural smart type

like he’ll just know random shit

he’s the type to mumble the answers under his breath during oral recitation

TO HELP !!!! TO HELP !!!!

you only have a few memories with the boy and the most prominent is just so silly

you had one of those by-three quiz bee type of activity in school where u had to write ur answers on a small whiteboard and raise them

jay’s group was seated in front of you

and he’d just notice you leaning forward and trying to copy off them bc ur team is hopeless 😭😭😭😭

SO he angles his whiteboard while answering so you can see better

to the point where when the teacher looks back he just shoves it in ur face right away

ur teams laughed so hard

but yah !!!! just a funny memory to remember him by

you don’t realize you live in the same neighborhood until you commute back home together once

insert spider-man meme here

“you also live here?”

“yeah, i do”

so, on the occasion that his parents pick him up from school in their fancy car, he lets you ride with them back home

and when commuting, he always makes sure to guarantee you a seat if that’s like a train or bus

also stands in front of you so strangers can’t be weird and creepy

since then, you always ride with him home whether that’s in their family car or commuting

it’s a silent agreement

and he gets so used to it to the point that he WAITS for you sometimes…

[faints]

you’d be caught up in your club meeting and just see jay hovering outside the classroom???

he’s on his phone, totally unaware of you heading towards his direction

“hey, you done?,” he’ll say, backpack swung behind him as he reaches to take yours

“you didn’t have to wait for me,” you’d reply shyly

“but we always go home together, don’t we? besides, it’s getting late and it’s not safe for you to commute back home at night”

JAYYYYYYY… the man that you are

when he gets comfortable, he starts talking to u in class too

like not just casual conversation

he’d full on sit next to you and gossip

which surprises u bc you’ve never seen him willingly get off his seat to gossip with someone

NOW important thing to note is that your canteen is like three buildings away from your classroom so it’s a long walk

this mf always asks you to come to the canteen with him during free period or when the teacher doesn’t show up to class

“let’s go to the canteen”

“no, it’s tiringgg”

“i’ll get you whatever you want”

“ok let’s go!”

he’s balling 😭😭😭😭

jay just lets you get whatever you want in the canteen

true to his word, he pays for all of it

it’s kind of being his secret tactic to manipulating you to come with him to things

but who’s rly winning??? you get FREE things and u hang out with THE pretty jay

he thinks he wins tho😕😕 bc he likes u and loves spending time with u

so when that “no” forms on ur lips, he knows exactly what to do to force you to come with him

THO u do pay for his food sometimes or the fare for commuting back home bc u feel bad for taking his money

oh jay also gives me the one who offers to have practice over at their house

you are a frequent visitor in his house

his parents know u… the housekeepers… everyone just knows you at this point

you even go to some of their family dinners together when u hang out and his dad suddenly wants to eat out

“bring (name)” PLSSSSSS

they’d be interrogating u and getting to know u and ur family lots

jay’s the one that gets embarrassed and tells them to stop !!!!!!!

sometimes his mom would let him bring food for u in school

“this is (name)’s favorite, right??”

his parents LOVE you

u just become part of their family 😭

to the point that they say “about time” when jay finally asks you to be his girlfriend

“finally!!! she was basically already my daughter anyway!!!” his parents would say

BUT THE QUESTION IS

How does he ask u to be his gf

i have a story for U !!!!!!!!

it’s one of ur school events and u’re one of the people going around taking photos for the paper or so u could post it on the school page

you would stumble upon him during his contest

he would give you a quick smile before going back to Concentration Mode

THEN u kind of get tired walking around the whole campus so u hang by ur room where all ur other classmates with no contests are

AND THERE’S A GUITAR

you don’t know how to play the guitar

you jokingly get it and put it on your lap just as jay walks into the room

his eyes light up and he’s stumbling to sit next to you, asking if you know how to play

you don’t 💔💔💔💔💔

so he teaches you BYE

he helps you learn some basic chords and some strumming patterns

would whisper a few words of praise even at the smallest things that you get right

jay is SOOOOO encouraging that it’s painful

would make so much accidental eye contacts at ur close proximity

anyways this school event lasts a few days

SO at the last day .. during awarding .. he asks if you’re busy and if you could meet him at ur classroom

it’s empty obv bc everyone is at the court for the awarding

HE CONFESSES

Yes just like that. jay confesses to u.

it’s so clear he’s nervous bc of his foot tapping and his fumbling hands and how he can’t make eye contact all of a sudden

ofc u say YES

when you go to upload the photos for the school event .. u find some pictures of u taken by him 🥹

[oh-no-its-bird]

Please tell me more about force fem Minato being made the shinigami's wife

From this ask meme

I fucking knew someone would single that one out. Anyways, from my notesapp:

Force fem Minato being made the shinigami's wife as punishment for his hubris He and Kushia used to joke about Minato being the wife between the two of them, so he's eventually able to cope w his situation and dissociate by relying on the "I'm Kushina's wife" joke as a crutch to make it all feel slightly less awful The shinigami sends him on errands as his wife (collecting souls lmao) and Minato uses it as an excuse to watch Naruto and Kakashi from affar,, Umm maybe some of the errands involved Minato baiting people into making deals with and summoning his shinigami husband? He is the lure and the shinigami is the stick lmao The shinigami can't actually do things or manifest in the real world without someone first inviting them into their lives, so, like, that's part of what Minato's wife duties are. To get people to open the door to the shinigami. Among other things

+ Bonus which is kind of unrelated but was on the same notes page:

I like Minato for the take that there's something fr wrong w him and he makes a concious effort to appear normal and kind

He's like. Somewhere on the spectrum of sociopathy or has severe borderline personality or just some genuine mental illness and he works very hard, borrowing the mannerisms of those around him, to be charming and nice n stuff

I forget what fic I saw that in but like THATS the fic that made me care ab him

Hashirama 🤝 Minato

'Being friendly to the point that there's smthn genuinley wrong with them'

Minato !! I think he has a lot of untapped potential specifically in the market of fucking w shinigami. Like, what's even up with that? Let's play with that a little.

The man who would kill a thousand people in a day and return home happy to his wife,,, now turned into the wife who the shinigami who would kills thousands in a day returns home to,,, is this karma?

There's a few different directions this could go in tbh— both from the angle of like. How Minato is feeling / what he's going through but also like. Shinigami and yokai lore. What kind of shinigami / yokai lore are we playing with here.

The question isn't just what Minato is going through but also where the fuck is he. Is he in the Shinigami's personal little death dimension? Stuck inside the shinigami mask with him? Or is there some sort of broader shinigami world he's now living in? Is it only the shinigami, who Minato has to deal with? Or does he watch over any of the (no doubt countless) souls the shinigami has in its collection? Does he interact with any other yokai? Are the yokai he meets inside of whatever death dimension he's in or is it that he meets them when he leaves it to run errands? Or in some other, third place? Is Minato even human anymore or does he classify as some sort of yokai now too?

So many fun thoughts!

Anyways ummm. Thinking. Having thoughts. Specifically having abstract thoughts ab some sort of enraged Uzu fox ghost Kushina and new yokai shinigami wife Minato

Kushina's ghost is an Uzumaki one,, she grew up in Uzu where they just kind of have death god shrines n shit, apparently, she was never going to become a normal spirit. And that's not even counting the fox in her + all that weird yin/yang stuff w kurama. She is an angry, angry fox ghost with Uzumaki roots and she wants her wife back !!!

Umm Romeo and Juliet style forbidden love in the afterlife of Minato one day running back into Kushina's spirit (probably while they're both taking a moment to watch over Naruto / check in on Kakashi)

And they like. Do the spider man pointing meme bc HOLY SHIT OMG MY SPOUSE YOURE ALSO TRAPPED IN THIS AFTERLIFE LIMBO and also make out and like tell eachother what they've been doing (Kushina w her cool Uzumaki spirit lore and Minato w his much less cool "yeah so the shinigami um. Turned me into his wife. So.") but then they're forced to separate bc Minato can only leave the shinigami's domain for so long

Forbidden romance under the eye of the shinigami,,, if Minato gets caught the shinigami threatens to make him reap Kushina's soul to add to his collection

Idk but there's just a lot of potential here.

Naruto not from the POV of anyone living but instead from shinigami wife Minato trying to slip in time to see his fox ghost wife again as the plot of Naruto happens in the bg, could be fun

Then the Uchiha massacre happens and suddenly so many more angry spirits are getting added to the mess, oh boy

But yeah thank u for participating in the ask game here is a much longer than I meant for it to be tumblr post as ur payment

[reignpage]

wait wait... are reactions back on the table?? is it okay to ask for some?? 😭 how do you think jjk men would react to seeing reader shopping for a gift for valentines at the same place they were shopping to get gifts for valentines? (I know valentines was a while ago but still) 🙏🙏 I hope this makes sense 💔💔

Gojo: that Spider-Man meme

Oh? Oh! Heyyyyyyy baby, fancy seeing you here ahahah. Don’t we have great taste wowwww. Should I help you pick out a gift for me? I like what you have but I’m afraid that’s a little too small for me. Let’s size up, yeah? No no, don’t look at what I’m getting you, it’s a surpriseeee no, stoppp you’re ruining it ughhh

Geto: sheepish but tries to distract you

Hi, pretty. I really wasn’t expecting to run into you right here and right now. Say, why don’t we pretend this never happened and have lunch? We can try again by ourselves respectively. Pick the place, I’m happy wherever.

Choso: excited, forgets what he was even doing

Oh! Hi!! I didn’t know you’d be here! What are you doing? S-shopping for me? Oh, that’s funny. I was shopping for you. I haven’t picked anything yet so the surprise isn’t ruined or anything. I missed you a lot! Can we go get ice cream?

Toji: that one picture of him where it’s been edited and it says why are your clothes off? without that line ofc, but he’s just like, 🤨

what are you doing here? none of your business. alright, okay no need to get pouty. was just doing some shopping. no for Christmas, yeah for Valentine’s Day, obviously. don’t give me that, you’re here for the same thing, I’m not stupid. let’s just skip the theatrics and show each other what we’re getting. oh come on, ma don’t get mad. was just kidding.

Nanami: sheepish but upfront

Oh hi, sweetheart. Yes, you caught me. I was looking for things to get you for Valentine’s Day. It’s a good thing I’ve already picked up and wrapped most of the gifts otherwise I’d be very embarrassed if you already saw what I was getting you. Were you struggling? You know you never have to get me anything. Well, alright, I can help you out, if you’d like. No? Fine, I’ll give you some privacy, but do meet me out front when you’re ready, we can head home together. Text me if you need, darling.

Sukuna: embarrassed but tries to hide it

No, of course I wasn’t getting you anything. You know how I feel about partaking in foolish human traditions, it is a ridiculous display of consumerism and materialism. Never mind what’s in the bag. It’s not for you. And what’s in your bag? It’s not for me? Who is it for? Tell me and I will kill them.

[mizsmitz]

My condolonces to the Kaishin fans, but Kaito and Shinichi being revealed to be cousins is so funny though, can you imagine if there was a family reunion??

Yusaku's like "hey Shinichi we're gonna meet my twin's family who I haven't seen in years and just found out about now" and when they show up, Kaito and Conan immediately lock eyes and do the spider-man pointing meme or something.

Shinichi/Conan will immediately guess that Kaito is his long-time arch rival and Kaito's internally screaming, just, "OH SHIT OH FUCK ARE YOU KIDDING ME WHAT THE HELL" and wonder why the world has it out for him.

[slightlycomicobsessed]

i mean she WOULD-

What do you think would happen if we threw Danni into the DCU? For the fun of it.

so ngl me and angel are kindaaaa working on something like that but my answer is, as always, depends on which dani we're throwing in.

OG NM Dani likely will keep her head low but still somehow end up on batman's radar bc she saved someone. he tries to recruit her but she just flips him off and somehow becomes selina's or babs newest protege. MLF era Dani? She's going to commit at least 17 crimes, get a warrant out for her arrest from the GCPD but no one is ever able to catch her bc she just flies off on her damn pegasus. Bruce also tries to recruit her but she flips him off and then someone becomes a gotham rogue similar to Ivy but she just gives the GCPD PTSD flashbacks every time they try beating up peaceful protestors. Teacher Dani is drowning her sorrows and also manages to get adopted by steph bc she helps her one night and treats her as competent and like she knows what she's doing and steph l a t c h e s onto it. probably has a few one night stands with various BOP women without realizing until she stumbles out into the clocktower and everyone goes reallll quiet. generally though Dani is here to punch some police officers, punch the batman, and either forcibly adopt/get adopted by several members of either the rogues gallery or batfam adjacent characters.

[bomber-grl]

Leo Valdez x Latina/o reader

₊˚⊹Pairing(s): Leo Valdez x reader (no pronouns/no specific godly parent)

When y’all meet it’s like that one Spider-Man meme

He’s honestly really glad to meet another Latin person, especially if that person ends up his friend and eventually lover.

If you speak Spanish then best believe he gon be speaking to you in Spanish, most times it’s Spanglish but you still understand all the same.

I feel like when people of the same culture/ethnicity meet it’s an automatic click.

So that’s def what happened between the two of y’all.

Now, if you speak Portuguese or anything other than Spanish then lil blud is gonna try to learn your language 😭

I don’t make the rules that’s just how he is.

Doesn’t even matter if he butchers it so badly

(Prolly doesn’t since Portuguese and Spanish are similar (if that’s ur language btw otherwise it’s so bad 😭)

But still 🤷‍♀️

Now, if your latino then best believe y’all gon understand jokes that others don’t

Especially if someone does something dramatic. then you both automatically reference La Rosa De Guadalupe

And then it turns into this whole worm hole on the momo and ballena azul things on those episodes- and it’s a whole other story tbh

(Sorry if ur reading this at night and got scared from the flashbacks)

Anyway, he’s that one person at Latino parties that’s a lot of stereotypes ngl

Like he’ll be that one older cousin that absolutely obliterates the piñata and then runs all cutely to you to give you the candy as if he didn’t push some 5 years olds.

But also that one guy in the table chismeando with the tías

You can’t tell me he isn’t a little chismoso 😭

He’d probs also be the guy that handles the piñata and purposefully move sit out of the way each and every time.

Continuing from that…

He’d def dance w u on the dance floor

Lil blud got them moves

And he def spends the most time w the little kids

No matter where you are 😭

Moving on, if you ever call him an Edgar or sum shit then he’d get so genuinely shocked

Like you absolutely recked him

How dare you?

Especially since his hair isn’t even an Edgar cut 😭

He’d be so hurt but move on (not at all he’d hold it against you)

Ofc lil pookie loves you so let’s move onto the more affectionate hcs

He calls you mamas or mamacita (fem nicknames) 😔

*insert vine boom effect*

Not to mention if you’re male leaning he’d call u some shit like papi chulo or since he’s kinda a nerd and into anime (personal hc) he’d call u senpapi

Like ain’t no way-

Bro is so embarrassing when he says this shit like wtf 😧 nahh git trippin

Nah but (unlike in the books) him calling u this shit is mostly satire

Especially when y’all call eachother the most rancid nicknames so it’s ok 🤷‍♀️

-Sometimes…. *insert that wiener dog side eyeing meme*

It’s fun being w him cuz y’all can just casually talk about whatever that involves your culture.

Like even talking about favorite Latin snacks is an actually convo y’all have had and it’s honestly great.

Especially when he says a word in Spanish cuz he don’t know it in English

bro doesn’t know how to speak in English or Spanish sometimes.

Honestly same

I mean lil broski is glad to have you as his s/o at all

Lil homie desperate

But it’s the icing on top when he finds out your Latino/a

Makes y’all closer and makes him glad he can reference things, knowing that you’ll understand.

[rocksibblingsau]

Any thoughts about Spider x Branch ?

Absolutely

It's absolutely one of those things where WHAT could be more romantic than a rivalry. Any cartoon that has used a rivalry as a replacement for dating comes to mind.

Spider tries to do arcade dates but they just end with him being devastated and defeated at any game.

Spider tries to win prizes for Branch at festivals/fairs and fails, only for Branch to go "Aw did you want that? Here let me try." and then win it for him.

The Diner Gang and The Living Dead meet up at Jailhouse Diner for group hangouts. Branch is considered an official member of The Living Dead and there are many jokes about stealing Branch from one group or the other.

Spider would write a zombie love song for Branch. Branch doesn't have the heart to tell him he does NOT understand cannibalism as a metaphor for love.

They wear each others merch.

Spider would attempt to like BroZone because Branch was in it. When Branch says its fine, Spider is like "Good because baby this stuff is slop. 'Girl you break my heart Girl' felt like a break up song written by a 40 year old man who has never dated once in his life tried to make a break up song to appeal to teenage girls."

If Branch wrote it though he'd like it more. Still not his thing but he's just like "That's my man!" kind of supportive. He likes Kismet a bit better for this reason. (I think he and Ablaze would be friends)

Spider would live to be BroZone's #1 enemy. John Dory jokingly says "Have him back by 9" and Spider would go "Just for that, Branch how you feel about staying the night?" He picks so many fights. You know the knife cat meme? He's knife cat.

For this reason, Barb loves the guy. Barb fully supports the relationship and Spider being a nuisance.

[starwarskawaii]

DRUMROLL PLEASE!! It's time for my Correct™️ Miguel headcanons! Finally!

CW: mentions of anxiety, PTSD, child death and non explicit mentions of sex and sexuality

● He has SEVERE anxiety. He is the personification of that "how come when I think bad things are gonna happen it's anxiety not spidersense" meme

● absolutely has really bad PTSD which he struggles to get treated because he would have to actually open up

● has a weird thing for Lyla. I can't find official sources, but I've heard her appearance is based on Xina. And Lyla is clearly Asian. So. Do with this what you will

● the mentioned thing isn't quite romantic. It's... kind of a manifestation of repressed guilt coupled with sexual attraction and a deep desire to fix the unfixable things in his life

● He has very high moral standards for himself and others

● To the point of extremes

● Gabbi is absolutely Dana's. Dana left Miguel in that universe as soon as Gabbi was born.

● he's vanilla asf you godless heathens. This kinky Latin Lover is just not there. If he has kinks, they are super bland ones. Maybe he mildly likes being called Papi

● would NOT date anyone younger. The maturity gap would kill him. He needs someone at his level. Someone just as effed up, but more stable.

● has great hygiene, takes great care of himself, you really don't know when you first meet him what he's carrying

● Genuinely cares about the Spiderkids (you can't tell me he doesn't care about Gwen and Mayday). But his worldview is his only guiding light. If he's wrong, Gabbi died for no reason. He can't accept that. He can't accept that it wasn't his fault, and it won't be the fault of whoever else disrupts the so-called canon.

● sees himself as too scarred to ever find someone again. Too dangerous. All he really wants is a family. It has yet to occur to him that the Society can and will be his family. That he can have dinner with MJ, Peter, and Mayday. That he can go to Gwen and Hobie's performances and cheer Miles on at the science fair. That they can all have soccer games together.

● I go on the assumption that he has all his comic trauma. So, his brother is dead, step-dad sucks, real dad sucks, half brother sucks, Gabriel is dead, Xina was cheated on and hates his guts, Dana I neither know nor care. He also is probably still addicted to Rapture... so... what I'm saying is I feel for this man

● He needs a hug, man

● He's told Jess some stuff, but he really can't rely on anyone. Or at least he thinks he can't.

Now for the fun ones!!

● HATES TSUM TSUM MIGUEL WITH A BURNING PASSION

● Lyla orders stuff from other dimensions and has gotten him so. Many. Spiderman. Plushes.

● really looks out for the younger spiders, especially the girls who remind him of Gabbi

● really would be a happy person if he got some help. Has so much to give. So, so much

● Kind of finds the 2099 burger funny

● Almost no Peter Parkers speak Spanish. Miguel uses this to his advantage. Interpret as you please.

● the caf empanadas are his own recipe

● Has a sterile room overall, but he keeps the little trinkets other spiders give him (including a beloathed tsum tsum)

Thus concludes my very long list of Miguel headcanons

[fcthots]

Okay, so you know how wfa has Jay on a dating app? Reader is a vigilante for another city but lives in Gotham because 'the bats can handle that so it'll protect my identity if shit goes down' and for 'plot reasons' the commute isn't bad so they're not worried about emergencies. And they meet Jason on the app and they start dating. Neither have revealed their vigilante habits to each other yet.

So one time the two stay the night at one of their apartments for a longer than a weekend amount of time also for 'plot reasons' so at one point they have to go out. But the other doesn't know so they're trying to be sneaky.

They catch each other sneaking out and it's like that Spider-Man meme

❄️

doing more bullet points bc they make "long" fics achievable

you try not to wake Jason when you get out of bed. Just in case he woke up when you moved, you fake a phone call saying you'll go feed your friend who lives in Gotham's cat.

you open the door to the bathroom to change.

Jason did hear the call. he thinks the bathroom door opening is the front door so he thinks you left.

he changes in bedroom.

you finish getting geared up and grab a sandwich from the kitchen to hold you over.

you shove the sandwich in your mouth to free up your hands as you start crawling out the window.

Jason walks out the bedroom and drops his grappling gun.

you turn around at the noise, see him holding his helmet, cue Spider-man meme, and your sandwich falls out of your mouth and out the window.

"NO! SANDWICH!"

you dive out the window for it and Jason swears he had a mini heart attack.

[t0ast-ghost]

I will not shut up about Star Trek TOS yet and you’ve decided to listen in on that. So welcome to my thoughts on the 11th episode (The Corbomite Maneuver):

- starting off strong with these camera angles and movements

- *sees a spinning colourful cube in space* just go a bit to the left (he is not up for shenanigans today)

- can’t wait for Checkov to be introduced, I hear he gets a gun or smt

- WHAT IS THAT PHYSICAL CHECK??? Why does he have to lie on his back?? And why does he have to have his shirt off?

- if I were Spock trying to call the captain and he picks up and all I’d see was his tits… all I’m saying is he keeps a really good straight face

- OMG we got a “what am I a moon shuttle conductor or a doctor?”

- Sulu laughing at Spock’s sense of humour

- the close up on Kirk’s ass as he leaves the room is so intentional

- Bones sitting on the railing…

- how many surfaces can I sit on competition but my opponent is Leonard Bones McCoy

- just to prove my point the next scene starts with him sitting on a table

- god I feel bad for Scotty having to sit between McCoy and Spock in some of those meetings

- Sulu was cool as a cucumber

- “do you ever tire of questioning me on things you’ve already made your mind up about?” “it gives me emotional security” they are each others emotional support guy (Spock & Kirk)

- Kirk saying“navigation, you’re timing was lousy. Same with engineering, Helmsman” then Bones immediately after “you’re timing was lousy”

- how can you sit in a chair like that even (bones)

- Alexa play tik tok by Kesha

- (okay now I’m just imagining Spock dancing like one of those spider-man memes but completely straight faced (also Spock now listens to Kesha canonically but like in my head))

- THE FUCK IS THAT FUCKING THING??? THAT IS A PUPPET!

- Bones is so caring, he has so much fucking compassion I won’t shut up about him

- “you now have seven minutes left” but there’s 23 minutes left in the episode. Guess a lot of it’s just gonna be dead air… er space I mean (yeah I can come up with a better line than this later (edit: no I can’t I’m tired))

- SPOCK IS SO SAD. He truly thinks this is a hopeless situation.

- Bones is about to die in four minutes and he’s threatening Kirk because of the fact that he put Bailey’s health at risk… I love this man

- “Anytime you can bluff me, doctor” I can’t legally say what I thought was said but maybe the ancient archaeologists will know from context clues

- I don’t think Uhura has spoken to most of the bridge crew up to this point, she barely has had plot or even dialogue, I can’t wait till they give her an episode or just even make her more central

- Spock going to Kirk’s side after the bluff for emotional support

- Spock is so proud when talking about his mom :)))

- Your science and medical officers usually shouldn’t stand so close to your chair and clutch at it while leaning over you. It’s not normal behaviour.

- Okay I’d like to mention how calm Sulu has been and how much I love him, can we please get more of him in future episodes?

- wait so Bones is just gonna let Bailey go back to work? Like I get they apologized to each other but that doesn’t change that it’s still a bad idea to have him there

- Spock, Kirk, and McCoy immediately after the death threat is gone: guess it’s time to start flirting again

[Video description: Spock stands on the bridge, he says, “A very interesting game, this poker.” Kirk sitting in his captains chair replies, “It does have advantages over chess.” McCoy smiling at Spock adds, “Love to teach it to you.” Spock smiles back at him. End description]

- he’s got a twinkle in his eye

- The shake on the bridge as the tractor beam tows them is so funny if you watch Spock and McCoy (it continues to be funny for the next couple minutes)

- "Captain request to-" "Denied. If it's a trap.. If I'm wrong, I want you here" awwe he wants him safe (idc that this is not what the writers are trying to say, HE WANTS SPOCK SAFE)

- they all have to bend over on the transporter pad but when they get transported Bones isn't even bent he's just standing at his normal height slightly hunched

- HOLY CRAP I HATE THAT THING... I'm so glad it's a puppet

- nope okay I don't know what's happening, I can't. I'm. What.

- that is apple cider, they are sitting around this guy trying to drink apple cider

- McCoy doesn't know what the fuck to do right now and neither do I

Now imagine, if you will, Spock dancing

Thank you, and have a good day.

Master post of past/future episodes

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Propaganda why Batman is insufferable:

Always has to be right. Does the most janked up stuff and doesn't care who it hurts. Imposes his will on others to the point of willing to bodily harm them if they do not comply (and yes, this does include his children)

I’ll also support Batman as a candidate because of the slapping Robin meme, which is annoying, and because he is just way too much. Too much all the time.

Has to always be right, regardless of situation. Because somehow the billionaire has knowledge of how middle class people think.

Propaganda why Tony Stark is insufferable:

She’s a hypocrite who is ready to restrict the freedom of others when they make one mistake, but when he makes a mistake he figures he’s able to handle himself

Super long, sorry lol

Thinking about how in Homecoming when Peter accidentally caused that boat to get split in half because the Vulture’s gun exploded and Tony was acting like as if Peter was completely in the wrong for going there just because he did it without his permission. He was acting like as if Peter was out of line and “disobeyed him”, trying to act like his father. And then I remember how in CACW he’s the one who scouted Peter in the first place just because he saw he might be useful against a personal squabble between him and Captain America despite knowing that he was a kid and he’s just now acknowledging how dangerous it is because Peter “acted on his own”

Completely hijacking Peter’s superhero story and trying to control his every move (Training wheels protocol and baby monitor thing he put in the suit), acting like Peter should’ve known that Tony would send someone in despite the fact that he’d been ignoring him for 2 months since Civil War and not keeping him updated on anything!!

How the hell is peter supposed to know Tony is going to listen to him when he treats him like a kid instead of a superhero when it’s convenient for him? And when Tony loses his temper after Peter says he’s 15 not 14 like “the adult is talking” bitch he could literally flatten you without your suit!!!

I guess in a way he is acting like a father but like the absentee kind. He’s more like a sperm donor father trying to act like he has any rights over Peter’s life smh.

It’s not that reprimanding Peter for the situation is bad, but the way he makes it seem as if Peter is irredeemable as if Tony wasn't a literal weapons dealer lmfao. He could’ve said what was the truth about it without completely invalidating him saying shit like “no thanks to you” after Peter asked if everyone is okay when it’s literally thanks to Peter finding a lead on those guys in the first place that they were even noticed and it’s not like the FBI being there could’ve in no way caused a similar situation.

And then near the end of the movie when he’s getting crushed by the building rubble screaming and crying for someone to help him where the fuck is Tony?? That scene just proved that he never needed Tony’s suit in the first place to be Spider-Man since he had to use 100% his own strength to lift it off of him. I know he would’ve found the motivation even if Tony hadn’t been involved in the first place to give him the suit, take it away from him and have the words “if you’re nothing without the suit you shouldn’t have it“ echo in his head. Why did Tony even take the suit away? Like as if he expects Peter to stop being spoderman without it??? Holy fuck. This is why you don’t make it out of endgame /j /srs.

When Tony took this suit away from Peter he was like “God I sound like my dad“ shouldn’t that be a red flag to him? Wasn’t he literally just saying that he wished his dad was better than he was?? Lmfao

Tony is so annoying. When they first meet he straight up bullies Peter into fighting for his personal bullshit, insults and objectifies Aunt May in front of him, spits into his trashcan and is in general being pushy af. He blackmails Peter when he doesn’t wanna come to Germany with him AND HE DOESNT EVEN EXPLAIN WHY HE WANTS HIM TO COME. Uncomfortable vibes lol.

Tony being the one to tell peter “if Captain America wanted to hurt you he would’ve” when Peter was trying to state his case, yet HE’S also the one who put Peter in harms way when he didn’t even want to go with him???

Telling Peter that he should stick to being a “friendly neighborhood Spider-Man” (stealing his thing once again) when that’s what Peter _was_ doing before Tony took him out of his zone and filled his head with grander things to be apart of….bitch? Die. Ohh waaaait (jkjk) but yeah

There’s the usual “he’s a war criminal who only felt bad about it when he realized his weapons were killing white Americans as well as Arab people” reason, and also he’s just super annoying. You had to be there for the original Avengers shitty dialogue a la “we have a Hulk” that had Tumblr in a vicious chokehold. Also he was supposed to FINALLY go away after destroying all his suits in Iron Man 3 but he just… didn’t! Which is bullshit.

Portrayed as a hero because? He chose to no longer mass produce war weapons and bombs after suffering the consequences. Huge hypocrite. Doesn't care about anyone but himself. Will backstab people if they believe in human rights when it's inconvenient to him. Seen as a hero while he's the personification of privileged people saying they're not privileged

>Makes weapons

>Billionaire

>Made multiple AI Surveillance Robots

>Gaslight a child into fighting a super soldier in a foreign country for him

>His fans are annoying