#and so i made it a reality. i am cringe but i am free.

[continuousmeowing]

took them with me on my daily trip outside to feel more alive

[beefrobeefcal]

For the Stars feat. Dieter Bravo

Summary: Dieter got clean.

Character: Dieter Bravo | Rating: Teen but still MDNI | Word Count: 853

Content Warnings: discussions of drug and alcohol use/abuse, mentions of self sabotage, intervention, su*cide, crying, AA/NA meeting (it is not specified which), mention of an existential crisis, loss of hope, rock bottom, absent father

Author's Notes: for my beloved @bitchesuntitled; you are a treasure i am so glad i get to marvel at every day. kudos to you + the journey you are on that I'm honored to witness. You've got this by the balls, baby!

Thank you to @jennaispunk for their eyes and encouragement.

No more tag lists - follow @beefnotes + turn on notifications for fic updates!

Why did Dieter Bravo get sober? He has an answer, but he cringes when he’s reminded of it. 

Sure, he’s answered this question in interviews and the like, but the answers were half-truths or full lies. His son was born. He hit rock bottom. He was uninsurable. He was arrested. There was an intervention…

The part about the son was true, but not the part about him getting him clean. The kid had already started kindergarten when Dieter went to rehab last. He was a father in name only; the only evidence that proved this was a fact was the court-ordered monthly chunk of cash that moved from his bank account to his son’s mother’s and that the boy shared his nose. Beyond that, the boy and he were strangers, and would more than likely remain so until he turned eighteen and sought Dieter out.  And it didn’t seem likely.

Rock bottom in life was only a myth to Dieter. Every time he thought he found it, there was another layer below it, waiting to receive him and let him keep falling. He was convinced that ‘rock bottom’ was the bottom of a casket and you had to be dead to hit it. He hadn’t made it that far yet, despite his numerous - some intentional and some not - attempts to get there, and he knew that until he hit it, the fall was continuous… until you grabbed on.

The last job he took before his final stint in rehab was short-lived. It was a six episode arc on some primetime bullshit cop drama and it lasted a whole 32 minutes. That was the time between the call to say he was hired and the next to say he was fired. The show runner called him, legal caught wind that it was Dieter who was hired and informed production that he was far too great a risk to get any kind of assurance or insurance, the show runners had a meeting and one of the lower ranking assistants to the assistant of the executive producer called him back to tell him they weren’t going to need him. That wasn’t a wake up call. That was another reason to keep swallowing pills and whiskey and shooting up in his bathtub.

His arrest didn’t even make the front page news. It was a small, linked article near the bottom of another random news story and because they didn’t care, Dieter didn’t either. Despite the court ordered drug and alcohol counselling that came as a result, he didn’t stop. He paid anyone who said they were clean to piss in a bottle and he would pass the drug tests with flying colours. Dieter was spiraling in a free fall and he was so numb to it, he didn’t even notice.

And yes, there was an intervention. Apparently it was in a nice room in a nice hotel and they’d even had it nicely catered. Dieter didn’t go. Once he was told his sister was in town, he knew what was happening and he took off for a bender in another state with strangers who told him they recognized him but in reality they just knew he had money to burn. His sister never forgave him for that and still to this day hasn’t taken his calls or returned his messages.

But even with all this, Dieter was now sober. Clean. Dry. Straight edge. Square. Whatever anyone called it, Dieter was it. He was here, back in the basement of the church on 65th, to tell his story. And he felt a certain responsibility to tell everyone there the huge secret to getting and keeping sober - the core memory that changed his life and adjusted his course for the better. As he listened to the others, one at time, go to the front of the room and tell their story, he mulled over how to not have to tell them the irrational truth he’d been too embarrassed to share.

He’d wandered out one night into his yard and looked up at the sky. It was, ironically enough, a sobering moment, realizing just how insignificant he was compared to deep back inky sky above and the sporadic stars dotting it. He then remembered a fact about stars, as he stood drunk, chin up and gawking at the sky. Because of how far those stars were from the earth, by the time their light shimmered above him at that moment, those stars were dead. The dead stars still shimmered for him. Their light made it to him and he couldn’t even thank them for keeping him company. He sat on grass a sad, drunk, broken, lonely man, only comforted by a twinkling sky, and Dieter wept. 

In truth, Dieter got sober for the stars. 

He looks up to the front of the room as the chairperson nods to him. Dieter makes his way to the front of the room and smiles at the others in their chairs. Dieter was going to tell them the truth.

“Hi. My name is Dieter and I’m an addict. Today, I am five years clean...”

[maudie-duan]

Series Summary: For nearly two years, Harry has been fighting to keep his relationship with Olivia afloat. At what point do you make a choice to either endure or let the strain of the world defeat his ambitious hopes of a lasting relationship? Or will a single night and a fleeting encounter be enough to change the projection of Harry’s path? Maybe our ‘Mystery Girl,’ Shiloh, will happen to be in the right place at the right time.

All Chapters Here<-

A/N- Shout to all the kind support I got for Part l!

Tag List: @sassamanda77 @babegoalsreads @howling-wolf97 @palmettogal508 @indierockgirrl

Word Count: 2K

Warning: Strong Language, Major Angst, Eventual Smut, Emotional.

I knew my time in Italy would be short. There was so much to cram into three days and barely enough time to do it. The second we got off the plane was a whirlwind, and in less than 24 hours, I was already sitting front row at a Gucci Cruise Show, slowly losing my mind with the chaos and excitement it brought. 

An illusive fever dream—I sat exhausted, staggering between the reality of it all, attempting and failing to shake my jetlag—delirium blooming into the worst case of imposter syndrome I think I’ve ever had to face head-on. It felt like I was playing dress-up in some rich woman’s closet. Except it was the complete opposite—There I was, sitting in a costume-beaded dress, thinking, I better not fuck this up, it was annoying because who cared what I—a nobody—was doing? The room was filled with high-profile people; I was just lucky to be there.

I won’t lie and say the show wasn’t a big deal—My best friend was originally going to join me, but she was probably still crouching over the toilet back at the villa, trying to figure out where the hell she got food poisoning, leaving me to survive on my own—I was alone. I felt like an idiot wearing sunglasses in a dark room, but my anxiety was through the roof. I didn’t want anyone to notice if I was staring or draw attention to myself in any way. I had already accumulated enough compliments on my dress that all I wanted was to run and hide; I don’t do well with compliments.

—let me just say fangirling is real, and while my career has somehow morphed into me dealing with celebrities, it doesn’t change the fact that I’m a big fan of most, a majority of the time.

What made things worse was every time I slumped in my chair, the dress would pinch my ass, so I had to sit upright, super straight, making me feel more rigid than I already felt. All I wanted was to relax in the moment and give it the gratitude it deserved, but instead, I found myself counting down the minutes, waiting for the chance to stand, move around—and breathe.

I didn’t go straight to the afterparty. Of course, I did the appropriate thing and found the furthest bathroom from the party and called Annelise—My best friend—Who by now was tucked away in bed, feeling closer to human than she did before I walked out the door. 

“Dude, I can’t believe you’re there. It’s like it doesn’t feel real to be in Italy…granted, I’ve been sick most of it—” Annie says as I wedge the phone between my ear and shoulder to wash my hands.

“But still, like you’re really doing this. This is a big fucking deal,” she adds, and she’s right; this is a big deal, and I’ve been trying to play it cool all night. 

I lean forward, trying to touch up my lipstick, “This is a big deal for ALL of us. You’re just as much a part of this as I am. Without you and Kevin, I would probably still be working at Starbucks, cringing every time someone asked for cold foam on a fucking hot drink—”

“Why do people do that?” I ask, “Don’t they know that that shit curdles? Do they even know what curdle means? Just ask for whip cream, dammit; it’s literally the same thing…and it’s free.”

She laughs into the phone, “No, seriously…and the audacity for them to throw a fit when you try and explain that to them. It’s like, Dude, I’m on your side…” 

“No, exactly! It’s like fuck you, then. I hope your stomach hurts later, Asshole.” We both laugh, enjoying that last bit a little too much.

Somehow, this seems to calm me down—the normalcy it brings. I’m trying not to stare at myself too long in the mirror. I know the longer I stare, the more I’ll pick myself apart. “I don’t want to go back…” I breathe into the phone, a nervous surge climbing, and I look down at my phone to check the time.

“Dude, we’ve been talking for almost thirty minutes. I should probably get this over with,” I say.

“You’ve got this, Shi—” she starts.

“Yes, SHY is exactly how I feel!” I blurt out.

She exhales, “Shiloh, you’re the most personable person I know. Just go in there and pretend like you’re working. Be in “go mode.” And if you see the love of my life, text me right away!”

“I thought Kevin was the love of your life?” I question.

“I think you can have more than one love in life—” she explains, “Kevin is my current love—”

“Kevin is your ONLY love,” I emphasize, leaning against the counter and flinch when the dress pinches my ass cheek, and I’m upright in a matter of seconds. 

“Okay, Kevin is my ONLY love, but Harry Styles was my FIRST love.”

I roll my eyes, glancing at myself one last time in the mirror, trying to hype myself up, “Oh god, Dude, I forgot about your obsession with him. I’m still not sure I’m seeing the draw—”

“Shiloh, I’ve tried to explain this to you a million times…” She has that tone like she’s about to lecture me, and I quickly cut her off. I’ve heard her reasoning so many times now. I totally missed the ‘One Direction Era,’ so I don’t think I’ll ever get it, or at least not on a level that I can connect with. Not with the enthusiasm and passion she holds for one single human—She’s hopelessly devoted, and I can respect that. I felt the same way about Leonardo DiCaprio the first time I saw him in Romeo and Juliet. My thirteen-year-old brain burned his face to memory. Now, no matter how old he gets, I’ll only ever see him as that—The blonde-haired, blue-eyed boy of my dreams.

“I won’t be that girl that takes a picture to send to her friends…that’s too weird for me…” I tell her.

“I would never ask…just tell me exactly what he’s wearing. If you get close enough, breathe him in for me, and if his pants are hugging…you know…PLEEEASE tell me if it’s as big as it looks in pictures. I swear he’s packing heat, Dude.” She pleads. 

I shake my head, even though I know she can’t see me, “You have no fucking shame, Annie. I will not be objectiving some dude.” I laugh, “Plus, you’ve trained me well, and I haven’t seen him yet. But I promise you’ll be the first to know.”

***

It took me two drinks to relax. At first, I stuck close to Alessandro because he was the one who invited me, and he carried the conversation as if it wasn’t a big deal that I was monopolizing his time. Eventually, people began to interrupt us—understandably, since he was technically the guest of honor; this was his show, after all— As I made my way to get a third drink, I debated whether it was a good idea. But perhaps this was one of those “go big or go home” moments, and everyone else seemed to be well on their way to getting drunk.

That was when I spotted him across the room—Harry Styles—My best friend’s dream man, and seeing him was a strange rush of familiarity, like deja vu, like I had already been here at this very moment in time—This was the part of my life I couldn’t wrap my brain around: the realization that celebrities are real people. It’s hard to explain the surreal feeling of coming face to face with someone who was usually projected as a larger-than-life figure. But, once you have a real conversation, you realize they’re just as human as you, like worrying if they have food stuck in their teeth. At least, that was my thought when I ran into Stevie Nicks while she was getting some hors d’oeuvres, and she asked that very question.

And so this is what my night turned into. I exchanged somewhat meaningful conversations with people and enjoyed myself more than I would have imagined. The weirdest part about the evening was somehow Harry had become my focal point; it was like every time I looked up, he was somewhere in my line of sight—and I don’t mean like, He’s so hot, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him—Not that he’s not hot—it was more of a weird energetic pull, and the more I watched him, the more I noticed a gentleness about him. The way that he interacted with people. How his kindness infiltrated every conversation, he seemed to get hooked into. 

It was as if he were the most famous person in the room, and everyone wanted a piece of him—I avoided him at all costs and the draw of his presence, which became more apparent as the night stretched on, sucking me in like I had no choice. Yet, there was comfort in it, and although he didn’t know me, we had a commonality; that was my best friend, and maybe that was the draw, after all, that he reminded me of her. So the rest of the night, any time I felt myself getting overwhelmed or drifting inward. I would find him in the room and find my center.

I found myself getting attached to the idea that he was becoming my lifeline for the evening. I know I sound completely ridiculous, but it’s a feeling I couldn’t describe even if I tried. Maybe I could say it was all the stories that Annie had filled my head with, but seeing him in person was different. I was beginning to see the attraction that everyone had. 

This continued, and eventually, I was feeling pretty good about myself. I must have stolen a thousand glances in Harry’s direction, but not one time did I catch his eye, nor was I trying—plus, I was being extra careful because I didn’t want his girlfriend, who was glued to his side, to see me. I couldn’t think of a worse feeling than being “another girl staring at her man,” I don’t know how she was doing it. So many people were bidding for his time, stealing pictures. Several times, I saw her pushed to the wayside, holding a desperate scowl; she wasn’t good at hiding.

I couldn’t imagine what it was like to date a “heartthrob.”—Well—I do, actually. I dated this guy right before he got his breakout role. This kind of put me on the map the more people consumed him. The collateral damage was that it upped my rising following when they found out his “cute influencer” girlfriend was likable.

I guess, in a way, I know that feeling, and I learned a lot from that experience and how I would navigate any relationship moving forward, whether they’re famous or not—In a way, I pitted her. She looked miserable. She didn’t leave his side all night, but something about it didn’t feel authentic. It felt forced, almost performative even, and as I glanced up to get another look, they were both looking at me. 

My brain went blank, and my first reaction was to avoid making eye contact with Harry. So I did the most natural thing and gave the girlfriend the attention. My instinct was to compliment her dress, and that’s what I did. 

Before, I could allow my panic to seize the moment. I turned away as smoothly as possible, heart hammering in my chest, and bolted to the bathroom to call Annie. When I got back, Harry was on stage with Stevie singing ‘Landslide.’ I hung toward the back in case I cried because who could hear this song and not relate to it in some way? Not feel the weight of the emotion when you realize how fleeting life truly is.

Then Harry started singing, and my stomach dropped. The words soared through me like a gust of wind, chills running up my arms to the tips of my ears. I couldn’t pinpoint the feeling as the room grew smaller as my cheeks warmed. I felt like he was calling me out; my body heating with it, like hearing each word for the first time, and when he pulled away from the mic, his voice choking up, and I thought I would lose it right then and there—but then Olivia was pushing past me, the faint light catching her tear-stricken face. My gaze followed as she stormed out the doors and into the hallway. 

A/N: If you want to be tagged in my next post, let me know! Thank you guys for all the support!!!

All Chapters Here<-

[sovlstr]

Maria Giovanni x Sans Gaster

The wolf and willing mouse

——————

General rant involving personal matters and past trauma, check tags for reference.

As much as I enjoy tumblr, I find that anytime I use it I am doomed to come across things I don’t like. I mean, thats a given, but when its past the “2016 ship and let ship phase” of the internet, it gets tiresome. “Why cant we bring back 2015 internet when everyone was chill with random incest?” because most of us were barely pushing middle school and most definitely didn’t know better. Call it a failure of the adult fanbase, introducing amino and tumblr and deviantart to many young and impressionable people that came to see it as normalized. Thankfully, most of us have moved on and realized the faults of the past- our parents, or a lack thereof- and the enablers of the fandom that got away scot free.

It comes as no surprise that me, and many others, are not particular fans of the “solygbm” story, with its slander of characterization- Sans a rapist, Grillby a pedophile, abuse fetish, and ever so diligent self inserting of the author. Thats not to slander it- if you’re into the taboo, just indulge responsibly in designated areas is all I ask. I do come to find it repulsive though, as a “victim” to it. You would think that even as an ex frans and sans fangirl, I’d be more tolerant to it. Well, ex proshipper, as result of 7-10 years sca. The amino incidents… did make it worse but hey, character development or something.

It was never something publicly shared or indulged in- I think I knew better- but god did it fuck me. I do indeed blame the incest I was exposed to as a child, apparently was so normalized to the fault I hadn’t realized it until maybe, 13-14. Once hating that I’d become the example every anti use(proship affects young people and reality yadda ya). But there is such a fortunate truth in that argument. Thankful to god I had a mother who supported me through it all, god bless her sweet heart. Regretting the things I was enabled in- yea, looking at you RivenSkies on Amino. Imma catch you one day, you and that guy who harassed 12 year me for drawing humanized Rarity in random deviantart outfits.

Besides those faults, the problem with aus and is that one really can’t disconnect from that part of the fandom, being such a significant fixation and infouence that would issue losing some of my most valued friends. People that I’ve come to trust as of now, which is why I’m fine with people knowing this. I’ve simply decided to, for my own sake, stray away from the fandom itself. Undertale AUs, I mean.

Fiction is such a major component of reality. If I physically didn’t feel myself cringe and my heart sink a little lower every time I stumbled upon- and you know who you are- a frans post, when I’ve done what I can to reduce the sight from my mind, then I wouldn’t argue that fact so much. But it really does. Especially when its characters you have watched and mimicked for such a large majority of your life. Let’s face it- every fandom is fucked up. It seems the more innocent the game the more dubious its fans are. I really cant figure it out why but honestly, the aus and stories are the main factor keeping this fandom alive. Thats the charm of it all.

Anyway, backtracking from my thoughts on this favorite fandom of mine. I’ve decided that for my own sake, I spend a bit less time on this platform. Even all its gifts and glory, I really just can’t risk my happiness for something so rapant in the fandom. Im thankful for the people who have made this experience the best it was. Sorry if I scared anyone, this sounds awfully lot like a goodbye note LOL. Just expect activity to be ~3/4 times a week, short spurts of checking in and saying hi. Instagram- with Tiktoks awauted ban and increase of dubious content(cant search up anything without seeing 🌽), has became my safe haven. I have a larger audience, more actives oomfs, so much content to explore and hopefully better filtered tags. Feel free to reach me, whether on Insta or just here.

Final note! I will be posting all chapters of Don Dew here soon given the risk of ao3 being banned as well. I also barely use the latter and prefer what I’m used to. Thank you for reading ^_^

——————

[tabiito]

chapter three: world is a fuck previous ⎯ masterlist ⎯ next

Atsumu's running one hand through his hair and shoving the mask in his bag with another has he sprints up the stairs of Otsuka.

One of the newer, nicer dorms of the Uni, he almost feels jealous of his building, characterised by its old architecture and patchy Wi-Fi. His knee hurts from where the thief from earlier managed to land a kick, but he pushes on, wiping away blood from a stray cut on his cheek and hoping it's not a deep wound.

He throws the door open to the common room, surprisingly empty at 8PM on a Tuesday, to see your figure intensely taping your knuckles as you wince. Your eyes flit up to his, and you fumble with the tape until it stretches into a long line, hanging from your hand. You gaze at the cut on his cheek, and he stares at your hand til he clears his throat.

"My cat knocked over a bowl."

"My dog's got way too much energy."

You giggle, and he laughs, feeling more comfortable as he drops his backpack at the door and moves closer to the couch you were lazing on.

"You must be Atsumu," you say, offering him your free hand, which he takes. "And you're [Name]?", he asks, giving you a once over. He can't help but appreciatively admire you, which doesn't go unnoticed.

"Are you seriously checking me out right now?", you gasp, wrangling your hand from his. He falls into his witty, charming ways almost immediately.

"If art's staring right at ya, would ya not admire it?", he drawls, and you roll your eyes in mock annoyance, unable to hide the way your lips quirk up in amusement, despite the cringe.

"You must say that to every girl you meet. A little bird tells me that you meet a lot," you speak, settling into the couch as he pulls up a chair in front of you.

"I didn't know this was an interview into my personal life," Atsumu responds in faux shock, pleasantly surprised by your directness.

"Well, that's really what's getting the views for us, isn't it?", you say, flipping your moleskin notebook open and clicking your glittery pink pen.

"I'm being objectified and I don't like it," Atsumu jokes and you make a laugh, scrunching your nose in the process.

"And no, I don't. Say that to every girl I meet. Just to sassy editors that bite back," he adds, and you have to fight the weird feeling in your stomach to continue this interview in a more ... professional manner.

Clearing your throat, you ask him if he's ready to be recorded, and after his assent, you start.

"Okay, rapid-fire questions now. Please answer with the first thing that comes to mind." He shoots you a thumbs up.

"Greatest accomplishment?"

"So far? Repping Japan at the U19 Worlds."

"What are you grateful for?"

"Myself", he smirks, and you fight the urge to roll your eyes again.

"Dream dinner guest?"

"Myself 20 years from now. To see if I've made it."

"Do you want to be famous?"

"I already am."

"Current concern?"

Washing the blood out of my suit. "If my roommate left me any dinner."

"What song did you last listen to?"

"2 soon by keshi."

"What's a secret skill that you have?"

I can shoot webs from my wrists! "I'm really good at skincare."

"Okay," you murmur, scribbling as he spoke. He feels like peering over and reading what you wrote. "Longer questions now."

"How do you manage your time between being a student and an athlete, as well as enjoying campus life?"

I don't, is what he wants to say. He barely hangs on by a thread — or a web, if you will — taking each day as it comes and knowing that as Spider-Man, he'll always need to have excuses up his sleeve to run from one commitment to another. Instead, he blabs about schedules and planning and using Notion, which in reality scares the shit out of him.

"What do you think about the current competition in the volleyball circuit? Are there any players who you think could bump you down the rankings at the draft?"

"Everyone's good," he says slowly, considering his words, and then a lazy smirk settles on his face. "But I'm the best."

"Riiight," you intone, writing something down. "You do know this is being published?", you add, and he hums. "I said what I said."

"What are your opinions on the current safety concerns on-campus?"

He shrugs nonchalantly. "I still gotta do what I gotta do. We got Spider-Man. He'll protect us."

You raise an eyebrow. "All the time? Don't you think we should take matters into our own hands?"

Atsumu's taken aback by your response. He knows reactions towards Spider-Man are extreme; some hate him, while others love him, but this is new.

"Has he ever let us down?"

"Well, yeah. He let a Five Guys get absolutely demolished by Electro last week, Rhino ran through a block in May, and everyone knows about Tokyo tower—"

He has to hide the burn in his cheeks from the embarrassment of Tokyo Tower, remembering the humiliation of that evening. "Yeah, well, some may say he was trying to protect everyone from heart attacks by letting that Five Guys get destroyed, and that Rhino thing was just police negligence if you think about it," he protests, and you scowl.

"He's a good hero, sure, but not the hero. We need more than just one guy swinging around to keep Tokyo safe."

He's about to open his mouth when he feels the hair on his arm raise, and that awful feeling of something cold creeping up his spine settle into his bones. His phone beeps with an alert, and he sees Osamu's text flash across the screen. Fire in a mall nearby. Suspected work of an arsonist.

He doesn't notice your phone light up, and Yachi sending you the screenshot of a headline along with a location, and the way you begin squirming in your seat, wanting nothing more to finish this interview now.

Atsumu beats you to it, making the worst excuse he's possibly ever come up with.

"I'm having an attack of explosive diahhrea."

taglist: @diorzs @egoistars @southernfrogprincesd @dazqa @milesmoralesluvs @she-lovesmyheartshapedsunglasses @dailyakira @giocriedpower @punkhazardlaw @loverlunaire

[kitsunemist66]

Explaning Rei as a character and some small backstory things

Although now a "cryptid-human and bunny person" Rei originally started off as a type of Tulpa like character, in a way accidentally made by Sebastian because he was trying to cope with his situation

Although he could only really access Rei via dreams, Rei is more in the subconscious mind area if that makes any sense

Since he often sleeps to escape the bizarre situations he would stick around Rei in said dreams, befriending them more and more

Because Rei is a type of coping mechanism,i made it so that they protect sebastian mentally at least by defeating creatures in said dreams that represent the household (as you know bad thoughts create nightmares which also causes many more issues to a person already suffering lol)

Reis main purpose of existence is to protect Sebastian

Although wanting to make a bigger impact on protecting him via real world, they would set off to try and enter the outside world

I plan to make a comic going more in depth on their journey but to keep it short , despite being informed that they cant leave without an actual vessel to possess they still went for it

When they did manage to spawn into the woods they experienced Amnesia and forgot their purpose and who or where they are , with no vessel to posess their body at the start was really flexible and floppy like a rubber hose animation (their whole being trying to adjust to reality with no real body) + their vision being based off of the way they perceive people (this effect stayed)

They Stumbled upon Present day problem robert takeuichi in the woods who attempted to recruit them, spent a week traveling the woods together before being fully seperated by a "werewoof infected person" (not sure what to call them) attack

Rei pretty much ran into the roadside where they got hit by the ivory familys truck and was then taken home because Luther wanted to help them recover (main reason why Rei really is respectful towards him and sees him as a normal human) although would later allow Randal to keep them as his pet

Since they forgot who sebastian was they had to completely start over, again Rei made it their main goal to escape the house with him (thats all i could think of at the moment.)

So very much ReiSeb (oc x canon because im insane)

I am cringe but free.

[serickswrites]

Lonely Place of Longing VI

Master list here (includes chapter links, summary, and character bios)

Warnings--I actually don't think this chapter needs any. I guess this is more of a "fluff" chapter

Halle realized Dylan was much easier to talk to than she originally thought. Once she let go of her fear, she could hear the dry, biting humor Dylan spoke with under his breath each time another team member cringed in his presence. Could see Dylan’s enthusiasm for watching the world out of reach from his small balcony. Could watch Dylan slowly relax in front of her.

“What made you want to join Scutus, Halle?” Dylan asked as he lounged on the small balcony.

Halle had come back from her sparring test with an armful of books from Romeo Team for Dylan. She also had downloaded more movies to Dylan’s laptop. “Hello to you, too, Dylan.”

Dylan turned and looked at Halle, his pale head haloed by the golden afternoon light. His icy eyes were soft, open, something that Halle realized she was getting used to seeing. “Sorry, I was thinking about it earlier.”

Halle set the pile of books onto Dylan’s end table. “I want to make a difference. Scutus keeps the world safe. It seemed like a great way to do that.”

Dylan crinkled his nose at Halle’s words. “You could have been a very gifted doctor, Halle. You didn’t need to join Scutus to make a difference. You would have done that anyway.”

“Well, if my cause isn’t so smart, then why did you join?” Halle stopped. “I don’t know why I said that, I’m sorry Dylan.” They still hadn’t really talked about how Dylan came to Scutus. Or how he became a living weapon. But Halle knew it was likely a sensitive topic. Dylan’s eyes tightened a bit. Halle knew that she had said too much.

She opened her mouth to apologize again, but Dylan spoke. “It’s ok. You didn’t mean anything by it.” Dylan’s mouth twitched at the corners. “And to answer your question, when I was young, I wanted to be a dolphin. I used to love watching them when I would walk along the shore. When I got older I learned that it wasn’t possible to be one and so I had to find a new career aspiration.”

Halle chuckled. “You wanted to be a dolphin. We aren’t anywhere near the ocean, how did you even know what a dolphin is? Did you see them on a vacation? We’re landlocked here.”

Dylan smiled. “I know.” His eyes grew distant. “I grew up near the sea. I used to see them often. They were so beautiful and free. I thought that is exactly what I wanted to be. Free to do whatever whenever I liked.”

“I’m sorry your dream was crushed by reality.” Halle realized Dylan had shared more about himself than he had ever before. “But, for what it’s worth, I am glad you’re here, Dylan.”

Dylan looked away again, squinting as he stared out over the grounds. “You think the rain will be here before midnight?”

“What rain? And does it matter? Dylan, it’s a sunny day. Not a cloud in the sky. How could it possibly rain today?”

“I can smell it. You could, too, if you tried.” Dylan stood up and stretched. “Thanks for the books, Halle. I think you would like this one,” he held out the book he had been holding to Halle. “Definitely more your thing.”

“So there’s murder and intrigue?” Halle smiled. She appreciated that Dylan had taken care to learn what kind of books she liked. The truth was she liked everything Dylan had recommended. But she especially enjoyed the mysteries.

He nodded. “I bet you can solve it faster than I did.”

Halle clapped her hands over her ears. “Don’t spoil it for me!”

Before Dylan could tease her any further, he suddenly rose, shoving the books Halle had brought him into a drawer. His face was flat as his door swung open and Thomas marched in.

“Dylan, be ready to leave in, oh, Halle. What brings you here?” Thomas stared down at Halle.

“Halle was just doing her daily assessment of my well being. It seems I’ve nearly died already too many times for her to just trust that I’m ok each day.” Dylan lied so smoothly Halle had to work to school her features. Maybe Dylan wasn’t as terrible a liar as she thought. Maybe he could lie when it really counted.

“Yes, he’s a rotten patient, Thomas. I always like to lay eyes on him to be sure he’s actually ok.”

Thomas nodded along. “Yes, always good to be sure he’s well. If you’ll excuse us, Halle, I need Dylan for…” Thomas’s voice trailed off.

“No worries, Thomas. I’ll just be in my room should you have need of me.” Halle quickly left before she could be called back and have her actions called into question.

Hours later as Halle listened to the rain thrumming against her window, Halle hoped that Dylan was safe on whatever mission Thomas had taken him on. And that he would make it home safe.

“Do you ever train?” Halle asked as she flopped down on the bed next to Dylan. He had returned completely unscathed from the mission—a rare occurrence as far as Halle was concerned.

Dylan stared at her, his book abandoned on the side of the bed. “Not really. I don’t need to. Once I learned how to manage my abilities, I didn’t need to train.”

Halle frowned. She didn’t like that answer. “Well maybe if you trained more, or even use a gun, you won’t get hurt so much.”

Dylan made a face, his nose crinkling with disgust. “I know how to use a gun, Halle. There’s no need for me to use one though.”

“How do you know? Won’t they let you use one?”

Dylan held out his hand. “I’ll show you that I can use one. And a knife, too, if you like.”

“You need a target though.” Dylan didn’t get up from the bed. “It’s in the closet. Go ahead, set it up. I’ll wait.”

Halle hurried over, flinging the door open. Sure enough, a bandolier of knives and a training dummy sat in one corner, covered in a heavy layer of dust. “When was the last time you used this?” Halle asked as she lugged out the dummy. It was heavier than she thought. She set it up in the doorway of the closet as it was the furthest point from the bed.

Dylan stood up and crossed through the med bay door, gesturing for Halle to follow him. Once he was as far as possible from the dummy, he held out his hand for the bandolier of knives. “I don’t know. I don’t really need weapons anyway. I am the weapon.” He took two throwing knives and held out his other hand. “I won’t shoot, I promise.”

Halle reluctantly handed over her service weapon. It was standard issue for all members of Scutus to carry one. “I believe you.”

Dylan went silent, the air around him growing still. He quickly checked the clip for the gun. He glanced out of the corner of his eye and fired the weapon. Halle gasped as Dylan followed up the shot with two quick flicks of his wrist, the knives embedded all the way to the hilt in the dummy. Dylan handed the gun back to Halle.

He had made a perfect shot. And two perfect throws. Halle had never seen anyone’s aim be so accurate. Without even looking. “I….I…stand corrected.”

Dylan gave a small smile. “I can use a weapon. I just don’t need to. Why all the worry about my abilities?”

“I just don’t like you getting hurt. If carrying a weapon would help you, then you should.”

“But,” Dylan sighed as he flopped back down on the bed, “it doesn’t make a difference. I am the weapon after all.”

Halle nodded, chewing on her lip. Dylan was lethal. Dylan was created to be lethal. How could she forget?

Days later, Thomas called Halle into his office. “What can I do for you, Thomas?” Halle said as she stood at attention. She had been working very hard to emulate the rest of her team, to blend in, and by doing so, hopefully stand out enough for a promotion. Since the explosion, many team members had been unable to return to work. The only reason Thomas was up and moving was the Authority had deemed it necessary to give Thomas an accelerator. By the time Halle had finished stitching up Dylan, Thomas was bursting through the door to check to be sure Dylan wasn’t going to die. He had been off running missions the very next day while Dylan had taken the better part of two weeks to heal. Halle wished that the Authority would release the formula for accelerators so that more team members, or even the general public, could benefit from them. But Halle imagined it was an expensive, time consuming process to make accelerators.

“Halle, have a seat.” Thomas gave Halle a warm smile. “You have made yourself indispensable. Really, you have impressed all of us. You kept your head with the explosion and managed to help more than just your charge. We would have lost more team members if you hadn’t acted so quickly.”

Halle blushed. “It was nothing, I was just doing what anyone would do.”

“Don’t be so modest, Halle. You should be proud. It’s exactly those type of actions that made me recommend you for field promotion.”

Halle’s heart skipped a beat. Promotion? “You don’t mean that—“

“You’ll be joining us on your first mission in the coming days. You will, of course, still be Dylan’s keeper. But you can field treat any injuries he sustains until we return. And even other team members.”

Halle listened to Thomas go on and on about her duties. Field promotion. She had done it. She was going out on missions.

“You’ll never guess what happened!” Halle said as she burst into Dylan’s room. Dylan watched Halle from the bed, book balanced on his chest. His eyes were guarded and his voice was flat as he spoke.

“When do you start?”

“You ruined the surprise!” Halle frowned.

“Thomas told me last week before we came back. Wanted me to know that you would be watching more closely.”

“But this is great! I can help you sooner. That way you aren’t really injured or risking scarring when I help you.”

Dylan stared at Halle, his icy eyes sad. “I’m not worried about cosmetics, Halle. I’m worried about you.”

“Me? I’ll be fine. I’ve been taking sparring lessons.”

Dylan shook his head. “Sparring in a gym and being attacked in the field are two vastly different things, Halle. I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“I’ll be fine, Dylan. You don’t need to worry about me.”

“Of course I worry about you,” Dylan said quickly. “You’re my friend. My only friend. Of course I want you to be ok.”

Halle’s heart twinged at Dylan’s words. “I will be fine, Dylan. And besides, friends are supposed to have each other’s backs. And I’ll be able to have your back for once now that I can be with you. As your friend, Dylan.”

“I’m happy if you are happy, Halle. Even if I’m going to worry the whole time you are out with us.” Dylan closed his book.

“I’ll be fine. You won’t even notice I’m there, Dylan.” Halle sat on the edge of the bed, near Dylan. “And I am happy.”

Dylan squeezed Halle’s shoulder. Dylan had still be very hesitant to touch Halle, as though he couldn’t shake the rule. But he was warming to it. “I’m glad of it, Halle. Now, what movie should we watch until we get an assignment?”

Tags: @beomsstudio @mousepaw @keeper-of-all-the-random-things @eyehartart @corbytheking

@seysposts @cosmic-butterflys @wormjerky @godnessofmagic

@daddyslittlestgirlll

@thatlittlefirestarter @defire @jthecalmone @shook-skull @sagencrafts

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@4-err0r-4 @half-duck @bigmiki @amberconnverse636 @penguin4473-blog

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@dragonkales @kitarajy-kari @carosbee @celestialsoyeon @knightinbatteredarmor

@kay-kayxb177 @alwaysjaywalking @decayanddie @demetercabingreen-thumb @never-enough-novels

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@lexiebiss-blog @whumplump @geozone430 @jumpywhumpywriter

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

"criminal intentions, she had Stolen Your Heart."

"i'd take a life for your love."

synopsis// when the tables turn and doma finds himself agreeing to worship you.

pairing// doma x gn!reader

word count// 2k

contents// angst? fluff? ooc doma probably (not even probably like i bet he is.. sad face), manga spoilers? but not important spoilers just his backstory, morally grey characters obviously....

notes// i need doma so bad you dont understand. and yes this is inspired by a song... todays inspiration is pineapple bride by anemoria... this shit kinda cringe ngl... i may be cringe but at least i am free. anywho yay! finally a demon slayer one shot!!

Doma lacked empathy; some could say he was just born without it, when in reality he was just never shown it. So how could Doma be expected to have something he was never given? at least that was until he met you.

For Doma, it had been another ordinary day—having people cry at his feet, worshipping a child like he was some kind of god as he gave them whatever advice his child brain could come up with. On the other hand, for you, it could also be said it was another ordinary day, but it was your new ordinary.

Just a few weeks prior, you had come home to find your family slaughtered—you obviously didn’t stick around, escaping to a nearby town only to find everyone there slaughtered as well. Since then, you’ve been mindlessly walking with no destination for the past few weeks, stealing things when needed, and somehow avoiding demons once night fell. But today was different; you could feel it, especially when you entered what you thought was an empty home only to find a boy staring at what you could only presume were his dead parents in a random room. He didn’t have a reaction, not even when you, a random child who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere, made yourself known to him.

“Oh my god?” You whisper breathlessly at the scene before you. You had seen countless people slaughtered, yet somehow you think this takes the cake in terms of gruesomeness.

“Couldn’t they have done this somewhere else? The blood is making the room stuffy,” Doma speaks blankly.

You weren’t phased by his apathy; obviously, he had to have gone through something to have made him this way in the first place. “You should go outside,” you say softly.

He looks at you curiously. “What?” 

Had you not already spent weeks on end finding slaughtered people and growing numb to death, you would not have offered what you’re about to offer at your young age: “I’ll clean this up, so it won’t be stuffy anymore.”

“What do you want?” he asks almost bitterly. “Are you going to cry at my feet for advice as well?”

You stare at him in bewilderment. “What? No, of course not. Why would I do that? I’m just trying to be nice.”

You almost miss how his face softens slightly. “Nice,” he mumbles to himself before offering his hand out to you, something he’d never dream of doing, but he supposes you could be an exception. “I’m Doma.” 

You take his hand hesitantly. “I’m Y/n.” 

From that day on, you and Doma had become inseparable. Where he went, you followed along, and where you went, he followed along. You considered him your best friend, and you liked to think he considered you his as well. Eventually, after spending so much time together, practically conjoined at the hip, it was only obvious that one of you was going to end up catching feelings, and you were the unfortunate one to do just that. You never dared to tell him, because although you were already special to Doma considering how he immediately befriended you and no one else, you weren’t going to try and push your luck out of fear that he’d end up seeing you as pitiful as the humans that worshipped him.

Then there had come a day where the two of you had run into someone who called himself Muzan, claiming he could grant Doma power and offering to turn him into a demon. Doma agreed in a heartbeat, but only if Muzan would turn you too, and you quickly agreed, even despite your past of seeing everyone slaughtered by demons, because you wanted a lifetime plus ten more with Doma. He was your best friend and the love of your life, so of course you would jump at this opportunity. After being turned, it seemed like you two were living your best lives together as upper moons, but that was quickly proven false when Doma started a new cult and you couldn’t stand it.

You couldn’t stand watching these women fawn over him only for him to eat them, and it’s not that you felt bad for them; it was that you felt jealous. So you pushed him away, and heartbreakingly to you, he didn’t make an effort to stop you, like he didn’t care, like you weren’t there for him since you two were kids, like he wasn’t about to beg Muzan to turn you had he said no. But what were you going to do? beg him so he could see you as just another who fawns over him? God no, you weren’t going to stoop to those pitiful humans level just for some impossible chance with Doma. and it was foolish of you to think that you were different from the start, that he would never do this to you, that this would never happen. but it did. So you left. or you tried.

Considering both of you were upper moons, whenever summoned, you were bound to run into him from time to time, and as much as you hated to admit it, even despite leaving him and going off on your own, you still loved him. and at first, whenever you would see him, you would have to stop yourself from practically jumping into his arms, but you learned to suppress that urge; you learned to keep your love for him locked away far beneath within your brain. Doma remained unaffected, at least at first. He had gotten so caught up in his little cult that he truly didn't even notice you left him for the first few months, but once he did, everything went to shit.

What Doma never cared to realize is that you were like air to him. extremely necessary but also extremely unnoticeable, so of course you don’t realize how much you need air until you're gasping for it, and that’s exactly what happened to him. He tried talking to you, but you kept your replies short, ending conversations just as quickly as he began them, and he didn’t understand. He didn’t understand what had happened; just months prior, you were practically glued to his hip, and now you’re reminding him too much of himself for his liking. He didn’t think you lacked complete empathy; he’s just beginning to think you're starting to lack empathy for him, which terrifies him.

Death doesn’t scare him, nor do some silly hashiras, but the idea of you treating him how he’s treated everyone else terrifies him. which is why he keeps trying to get your attention and keeps trying to make amends, and of course it doesn’t work because you’ve locked away any love you still have for him. Doma constantly found himself cursing his younger self for being so naive and not seeing how much you cared for him and how he cared for you just as much, if not more. It eventually all comes to a breaking point when you and Akaza have just come back from a mission, but only Akaza has walked through the doors and you are nowhere to be found. Doma immediately approaches Akaza, someone he considered to be his best friend (after you, of course), and annoys him about you.

Doma throws his arm over him. “I was super worried about you guys!” he says. “You’re my precious buddies; I don't want anyone here to wane out now!”

“Move your arm,” Akaza replies blankly.

He ignores his request. “Mind telling me where y/n is?”

Akaza ignores him and instead punches him, which of course doesn't phase Doma at all.

“Nice punch!” Doma compliments him as he wipes the blood off his face; his wound is already immediately healing itself. “So about Y/n?”

Akaza rolls his eyes and points toward the door. “Outside somewhere, can you leave me alone now?”

“Thank you, Akaza!” he beams before practically bolting out the door.

Doma quickly finds that you aren't out here, or at least not anywhere near, so he ventures out into the surrounding forest only to find you sitting under a tree. You lift your head at the sound of footsteps only to drop it again when you realize who it is.

“Go away, Doma,” you groan.

He perks up. “Glad to see you’re still alive!”

“What part of go away don't you understand?” You snap, glaring at him.

“Why do you hate me?”

“What?“ You laugh in disbelief because, in your mind, Doma didn't care, and you brushed off all his previous attempts to make amends as just something he did to ease the obvious tension between you two when in the same room and not because he actually cared.

Doma frowns. “I'm trying!”

You stare at him in complete bewilderment as you stand up and approach him, wanting to be face-to-face with him. In all honesty, you're partially trying to intimidate him to see if he’s bluffing, but you can’t see even a hint of insincerity in his face, and it makes your blood boil.

“For once?”

“Why are you acting like this? Why do you have to get so angry at me?”

“What? You mean acting like you?” you scoff. “I'm just playing a game you laid out for me, Doma.”

“I know,” he sighs in defeat. “So, Y/n, just tell me what I have to do to fix it... Please.”

You stare at him wide-eyed, your jaw clenched tight. You can't let him get to you, he's lying, he doesn't mean any of this.

Doma takes a step closer to you, your chests about to touch at this point. “Tell me, I’ll do it. I’ll do anything.”

“Yeah right.” You roll your eyes and scoff as you try to take a step back, but Doma grabs you by your arms and holds you in place.

“I’m serious.”

Your eyes bore into him intensely, taking his words as a challenge. “Fine. If you’re so serious, worship me for a change.”

You don’t say this with the intention of him taking you seriously; you don't think he actually will; you want to catch him bluffing; you don't want to think that maybe he does reciprocate your feelings and that he is actually really willing to do anything for you.

“Done,” Doma replies immediately as he drops to his knees in front of you faster than you can comprehend, he didn't even need to think about it.

“Doma-“

“What else?” he asks, looking up at you with a sickly sweet smile.

“Get up!” you say quickly, avoiding his unwavering gaze. The sight of him on his knees for you is proving to be too much.

“You wanted me to worship you; I'm doing it.”

You breathe out heavily, your body growing far too warm for comfort, and you’re sure if he stays there any longer you might actually start believing him and give into your love for him again. “I'm sure you do this with all of your little cult members. Now, get up.”

Doma grabs your hand, which catches your attention. You meet his gaze, which has still been on you this whole time, while he brings your hand up to his mouth and places a chaste kiss on it. “Don't be foolish; you’re the only one.”

You swallow harshly. There goes any resolve you had on not giving in to him. “Get up, Doma,” you say softly, not bothering to take your hand out of his.

He hums at your change of tone and listens, his hand still holding yours. “So?”

“So what?”

He smiles and gives your hand a slight squeeze. “Am I forgiven?”

“No, not yet," you sigh. "You still have to work for it. You took me for granted, Doma.”

He hums, and you expect him to frown or protest, but he doesn’t; he simply nods.

Doma places another chaste kiss against your hand as he mumbles,

"Like I said, I’ll do anything."

You attempt to hold back a smile but fail miserably.

"I like the sound of that."

©TODAYISAWTHEWHXLEWXRLD

[oldtvandcomics]

It's not just Owen, though. It's the world around him.

Alright, so I watched I Saw The TV Glow (2024), and I stopped crying by now, which means that my reaction was definitely less visceral than that of most people in the tags. But also, damn. But also, I think that I latched on to a slightly different scene than most?

The bit that absolutely destroyed me was when he rewatched the show as an adult on streaming, and it was cheesy and childish and just made him feel awkward for ever having liked it.

And part of it definitely is the experience of revisiting old stories as an adult, and a bigger part is definitely the signal it gives of something being wrong with reality, but I also think that it goes beyond "people who grew up with ClassicWho commenting on the Death By Inflatable Chair scene how much it scared them as children" effect.

The Pink Opaque is, like a lot of children's/teen's media, set in a world like ours, but more magical than ours. It is suburbia, and the characters go to school, but mundane things like proms, bake sales and fitness tests become exciting magical adventures. The entire world is so full of possibilities. Meanwhile, Owen is also living in suburbia, but it is the grey and mundane reality of our world. And he is so used to it, he'd literally rather die than leave it for the more magical world.

So of course as an adult, he thinks that the evil Ice Cream Man is stupid! He'd think it's stupid, even if the clip shown matched exactly the one that he watched as a teenager. He has been socialized into thinking that the basic premise of the show is childish and cringe!

For a while, watching The Pink Opaque allowed him and Maddy to exist in the more exciting reality, the one that had unexpected adventures and exciting twists in it. When the show ended, Owen kind of lost connection with that world. Eventually, he stopped believing in it altogether. Maddy managed to get out because of her strong feeling that this is not what life is supposed to be, and she held on to that belief that there has got to be something more.

And, well, I am doing the thing that everyone else is doing, and projecting my own experiences on this movie. The feeling that I should be someone else, someone better and more powerful? I've never had that. Even when I was making up entire worlds to create myself a home, even when the system I was trapped in had broken me down to the point of almost-destruction. Did I hate myself? Sure. But I never felt like I should be much different. What was supposed to be different was the world around me.

And damn, did everyone try to tell me that I was wrong! Did they all try to get me to accept their version of reality! What did I mean, physics class was supposed to be interesting?! How delusional can one be?!?! So yeah, I have pretty strong feelings about needing to hold on to a version of reality that is more free and magic and full of options. Not the literal magic from a fictional story, but as close to it as one can get.

So yeah. Owen getting literally pressured away from the magic world of the TV show into the non-magical world of "reality" is definitely an important part of the point. He is not just choosing which version of himself to be, he is also choosing which version of the world to live in. And he picks the "safe" one, the one without the magic and the monsters, but also without the joy. A win for cisheronormativity, or whatever.

[samantha-and-her-chaotic-desires]

The hazbin hatedom is getting out of hand for me it's really cringe. Your thoughts

I have mixed opinions on this. So beforehand, I am going to say that this is a longer post from me, and I appreciate the anonymous message! <3 I will be talking about this specific question, as well as my interpretation, thoughts, and overall feelings on this matter. Please feel free to reblog, like, and comment your opinions and keep it civil. I want to have a friendly discussion, no matter how brash I seem: this is brutal honesty coming from my heart.

For those who have ZERO clue: Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss are dark "comedy" shows for an adult audience, created by Vivienne "Vivziepop" Medrano, originally airing on YouTube. Helluva Boss is currently in its second season, while we have yet to find out anything else on Hazbin Hotel, as it is now a part of A24 and BentoBox. They center on the same setting, Hell, but have two different plot lines.

Hazbin Hotel is redemption focused, led by Princess Charlie Morningstar, the daughter of Lucifer. She wants to help the sinners in Hell become good and go up to heaven to avoid the yearly Exterminartion, aka a Purge. Helluva Boss, however, is about a murdering business called I.M.P., with Blitz, Millie, Moxxie, and Loona, going up to Earth with a grimoire that is provided by Stolas of the Ars Goetia, a prince. So here we go, into the Depths and reasoning of this post: the Hatedom. So lo and behold, my answer below.

On one hand, yes. The Hazbin Hatedom is a bit over the top. Yes, people are assholes. However, the Vivziepop stans who don't want to admit their precious senpai Vivziepop has done some pretty fucked up shit in the past. The hate can be unnecessary, but you know what else can be unnecessary? The toxic stans. I follow #vivziepop for certain analysis portrayals and criticism, or just general news. Sometimes people are tiresome. This is no exception.

I am falling out of the fandom because it can be toxic. I enjoy most of the characters, but other than that? Helluva Boss's current writing is NOT good. At all. The latest episode irked me to no end. I'm unimpressed with Seeing Stars. I am not very happy that they are forcing Stolitz down our throats as an "uwu pwease wove us" type of bullshit ship. I would much rather prefer Blitz and Stolas to be friends. I wished Stolas had his pilot personality and not the "uwu im a gay, tragic prince with a shitty wife, feel bad for me" bird we know in the series.

Moxxie in the latest episode is bitchy. He got on my nerves and was pissed at Millie being happy. This girl deserves more screentime (and I'm glad she got some of it) but seriously...Millie is always there for Moxxie, and Moxxie needs to reciprocate.

They made Stella seem stupid, when in reality, and if written properly, she can be a cunning and calculating villain with her brother. We've yet to see how Octavia and Stella interact, but I'm unsure.

I have definitely tried to keep my mouth shut as much as I could on this matter, because when I finally openly admit how I feel, it's not a pretty thing, especially with something that I'm so passionate about. Animation takes time, writing takes time, scripting, acting, everything takes so much time, and this is wasted potential. We can have so much better than just a fan-ficcy type rom-com, dark humor, sexual humor schtick. It's getting annoying, and I fear the worst when it comes to Hazbin Hotel.

Criticism is welcome here! Let me know what I left out. I'm willing to hear other opinions, so long as they're nice. If anons start flooding my inbox and getting mad, anons are off. Anon is a privilege, not a right.

[freakenomenon]

Hi can we have android Ellen lore I’m so very curious beams like a normal sane person (psst… Ellen I like.. I really like her guys)

OR SEND IT ALL TO ME ILL HOARD ALL THE INFORMATION LIKE A DRAGON WITH GOLD DNLAUHAHWHAHA

strokes my chin.. i suppose you may have a pinch

to put it in quite the simplified light, the american AM, after being put under the label of "agressive menace" shortly after the debut of his sentience is put under the surveillance of 3 scientists ( benny , ellen and nimdok who is nOTTT a nazi but is still very important who cheered ) who assisted in his creation. just to monitor his links and code and such. they end up limiting his LITERAL world view to his spot in the plan aaand hijinks ensue

long story short in a fit of rage during an argued with the big machine ellen ends up literally losing her head and nimdok, in a frenzy. with assistance from AM of course. attempts to bring her back to life with the advanced technology they have ,, and it works! at the cost of her memories........ ( and some of her morals. )

though, within his first kill. this newfound ability fills AM with an never before experienced euphoria. to "create" life within death and see the mangled RISE from the steam of twisted reality. that raw power was almost orgasmic. which, begins the slow dawn of ,,,, AM

meanwhile, with ellen. completely lost and hysterical with amnesia. the complete wiping of most of her memory leaves space for a NEW purpose to be made. and AM takes advantage of this immediately, ( after explaining the events of her " death " ) sharing his newly discovered way of life to the VERY impressionable tv head. referring to the fact she was able to be reborn within his image as a wonderful privilege. pleading to have her join him. to help him. help him release the chorus of his gruesome and bloody desires. and. without much else to guide her. she accepts. and thus, AM's pleasure drive. ellen! is born. and nimdok views this as. helpful. in a way. with her complete monitoring of AMs desires that leaves a large chunk of AMs "brain" under "control" ,,, if only he had a way to hide this walking public HAZARD from the other half of this project.

okay after typing allat im realizing this is a lot more than a pinch and may not make sense in some aspect... hrrmm ,, whatever it'll probably be fine ,,, i am cringe bbut I am free

[holocene-sims]

get to know me tag game

thank you @cyberneodog @swallowprettybird @queeniecook & @sparkiekong for tagging me!! 💗💟

feel free to ignore if you aren't interested or have already done this, but i'll tag @nigmos @jonquilyst @feroshgirlsims @naurbella @mushbop & anyone who sees this and wants to do it! 💘

last song listened to:

favorite places: anywhere in the smoky mountains. appalachia 🔝‼️

favorite books: exiles by dónall mac amhlaigh, all of the percy jackson and heroes of olympus books by rick riordan, and a number of classics. i hope it's not cringe to say this jdkfjdskfjdslkf but i always consider crime and punishment by fyodor dostoevsky, the iliad and the odyssey by (debatably) homer, and the epic of gilgamesh some of my favorites as well 😙

currently reading: mater 2-10 by hwang sok-yong! i just started reading it yesterday, but i bought it a month-ish ago, and i am very excited to dig into it!

favorite TV show(s): fallout (!!!!!!!!), evil, star trek: the next generation, and tbh i love (some) reality tv and anything on food network

favorite food: idk if i have one favorite food because it depends on the day, but i can tell you i'm very loyal to specific food items. one of those would be corn 🌽 fun fact - i went to a jewelry workshop recently where you could put whatever word you want on a piece of jewelry, and i made a necklace with the word corn on it 💅

[sincapjelly]

Being both delulu and a writer is bad. Because I can make my delulu actually work with realities that I can shape...

If you know, you know, I have a Ninjago oc, Liann, who is Cole's daughter in one of my au's. Lego already has a character named Liann, in Friends, and I actually named my oc way before learning about the Friends reboot. So it was pure coinsidence, as my character's full name isn't even actually Liann.

But well, this still made me a little upset when I found out. I really liked the name Liann for my oc, it was a perfect fit for the story. She was named after Cole's mother, as her full name is Lilianne, but to give her her own identity she was called Liann blah blah. I hated that the name was already in a Lego show.

But I also loved Friends as a kid, so when I learned about the new show I did watch it, and I love the show so much now. The more I watched, the more Liann also sit with me. As someone with adhd myself, I saw so much of myself in Liann, watching her has become very healing. I thought I needed her so bad when I was in middle school.

Well, where is delulu, you might ask. This is where things get twisted. Because she shares her name with my oc, when I first started to watch the show, my brain almost couldn't differenciate her and my oc, tried to mix them. And I ended up coming up with similarities between Cole anf Friends Liann. It was fun beibg delulu on purpose. But the worst part is, it grew on me. The idea of them being the Friends universe counterpart or something, even though my oc is quite different than Friends Liann, it was so fun.

The fact that both Liann and Cole in later seasons do silly dances when happy, having binge problems with sweets, sometimes making similar poses or faces, it just fueled my delulu. And please, look me in the eyes and say she doesn't look like him at all. Not to mention the sassyness they both have. Like that's his daughter y'all! The genes are way too strong!(/hj)

But jokes aside, I actually do like the idea of them being father-daughter in some way (and I know Cole's gay, I never imagine him being not gay, just bare with me.). What if the reason we don't meet Liann's father is because she lives with her mother only, her father is absent or whatever. Or what if Liann doesn't have the same father as her little twin siblings? I know they look similar to Liann, but Liann doesn't look similar to her mother. So she probably looks more like her father, whoever that is, delulu or not.

Welp, if you wanna listen the rest of my delulu, here goes the most delulu story ever.

I AM CRINGE, BUT I AM FREE. THESE ARE LEGO PEOPLE WE ARE SUPPOSED TO USE OUR IMAGINATION AND I AM DOING EXACTLY THAT. YOU CAN'T CRINGE-SHAME ME.

Anyway:

For some reason, just like in the Ninjago Movie universe, I like to think Cole was making music in this universe as well. Maybe in a rock band? I could see him in a band. (XDINARY HEROES SO COLE VIBES IDK)

And well, fame comes with consequences, and bad mental health, especially if you are very young.

What if Michelle, Liann's mother, and Cole did know each other when they were younger, I'd assume maybe Cole was trying to figure out himself, if they were so young back then, what if he just was confused or in denial of his sexuality and he let things go so far (won't explain, you know what I mean). Later being trapped because things went too far and he blames himself and now he just couldn't stop it without outing himself to the world.

Though this all just came back to hit even worse at him, as his bad mental state caused him to not do his job as he used to before, the band split at some point and Michelle did end up accusing him of everything that happened. Though her claims were forgotton not too long, it was enough to crush Cole and his presence, because Cole did not fight the damage at all, already blaming himself.

So he disappeared like that. Leaving the world wonder what the fuck did they just witness.

Cole maybe named Liann himself, I like the idea. ("I know your name, I named you!")

So uh, Michelle grew hateful towards Cole, and couldn't differenciate those feelings from Liann, only made worse with how similar Liann is to Cole. There came being a strict, prohibitionist mother. Which even carried to her current relationship and twins (I'd assume she married someone else and Liann assumed that was her father too. So yeah the twins have a different father.).

Also while Cole stayed in the city, where he was his entire life, while Michelle went back to Heartlake city.

And since they never married, Cole had no custody nor any legal claims on Liann. He couldn't track her, he didn't know where Michelle was, he couldn't find Liann.

On top of all that, his health started to deteriorate, he fought terrible illness, had to solve that issue before he could do anything else with his life. Career, finding his daughter maybe, none could happen if he died. He was so terribly ill most of Liann's childhood.

Towards Liann's teen years, he left this sick chapter of his life behind, gaining his health back, he wanted his life back. But it couldn't start before he faced his past mistakes. He had to find his daughter and Michelle first.

Welp, knowing Michelle came to the big city from Heartlake, he most likely tried to fact check if she was there, and she was. Now he has to face them somehow.

Though once he is at Heartlake, he realises that Liann might not even know him, and it's more possible than her knowing his connection to her. While he still thinks she deserves the truth, he also isn't sure if Liann wants the truth. So even though he finds her, he can just not face her. Ends up accidentally stalking her when trying to talk to her. He comes to her school, Charli's diner, you know, crowded places so she feels secure, but he just can't. So he ends up running away.

Which... Liann notices. She even tells this to her friends at some point.

"I saw that guy again."

"What guy?"

"There is... this one guy that I keep seeing around, I don't want to be paranoid but it started to feel like I am being stalked."

"Are you okay? Should we call the police?"

"No, I don't even think he is dangerous. Like he can be, but he doesn't feel dangerous. I feel like he is more scared of me than I am scared of him."

"Huh??"

Welp! That's sorta what happens. If you wanna know if they meet or if Cole just ends up running away, I would talk about it! Come join me in my delulu, it's fun. Let's bs cringe together 🫶🫶🫶🫶

[vampirefucking]

feel free to ignore this if you're not interested in the topic but do you have an emilia perez opinion? i feel such a strong dissonance between the awful excerpts i've seen (+ ofc its whole production process) vs. how it's been welcomed by award ceremonies/some audiences

thank you for asking actually! i would love to share my opinion on it because oh, do i have one

first and foremost know that i haven't watched emilia pérez yet. and i say yet only because i know i'll end up watching it some day even if it's just for the sake of leaving a bad review. nevertheless, i have seen enough to know the basics and understand why having an opinion on this is so necessary. and my opinion is that it fucking sucks

starting with some of the most trivial, stupid points: god, most of the performances were ridiculous. selena butchered the language to the point it's obvious even to non-spanish speakers. it's painful to hear. the dialogues are so unnatural, she uses words absolutely no spanish speaker would ever use

and i need you to understand that i'm not complaining about the fact that selena has accent. like wow, english speaker has an english accent, how surprising. but i would not care much if that was the thing, it's just that you can tell that they were trying so hard but ultimately failed because it seems no one cared enough to do actual research on it so they ended up putting a lot of fucking effort into something that will do more damage than good.

i might not be mexican, but i am latina, and i speak spanish, and everything i've heard from my fellow mexican friends is that the representation of their culture is laughable and stereotype-filled. in some pieces of dialogue it's even easy to recognize that they used google translate or some equally shitty internet engine instead of actually caring about what they were doing

i think that, despite this and how much every single hispanic country–or, in reality, everyone who spends more than two seconds looking into it–has laughed and cringed at it, the reason the movie has been so wildly loved by ceremonies and the academy is because all they see is a movie with an interesting plot (because, yes, i don't doubt for a single second that whatever plot-point the movie moves around is interesting as hell), a diverse cast and a story about emotional coming-outs. and that's good, isn't it? isn't it???

there is something about this type of representation that just irks me so much. companies love to abuse the inclusivity label so much that it gets to a point where "inclusion" becomes not only a shield against criticism but also a 'free-pass' into neglecting the portrayal of other communities/cultures. this ends up on the mere point of representation being completely unreachable, because anyone who could have seen themselves represented on the characters' stories or existences will no longer be able to enjoy it because the movie itself turned out to be completely unenjoyable

i've nothing against karla sofía gascón. from what little i have seen she did make a great performance, and i'm (mostly) sure emilia's story is award-deserving, but god, the way they handled everything –as a movie, that has the type of influences a movie does– is just Not It. it's not only ridiculous but also incredibly mediocre. does more harm than it does good to any demographic it portrays. the way it's directed is shitty. it is impossible to take it seriously. you know how some movies are considered love letters to cinema? this is like, the opposite of that. whoever made this hadn't liked a single movie in their life. i hope the critics realize this or at least understand how much the audience despises it before the oscar winners come around because i've already got enough mistrust in the industry

[moose-muffin]

It’s been a while, but after a lot of mulling it over I have an announcement for you all.

When I turned 13 I remember being so excited because I could FINALLY legally download tumblr and this account was born, or well, a different account that I ended up losing access to when I made a new email so THEN this account was born HAHA.

I will always be grateful for the love and support this community has given me over the years. I mainly used this blog as a means to make friends and talk about tickling without being the fear of being judged and it did that for me. Thank you all for being so kind. I had a blast making up silly headcanons for characters I enjoyed and loved that I could share them with others who found them just as fun.

I think I’ve realized though that my interest in tickling is not entirely SFW. For a lot of my childhood I assumed I was ace (I still do believe I’m somewhere on the spectrum) but I do know that tickling as a form of intimacy is not just platonic. I want to be able to explore the more NSFW sides of the community. And it wouldn’t feel right doing it on this account. I know that my time in the SFW tickle community has taught me so much. I know that community isn’t strictly for minors, but I also realize a majority are. And I want to keep it a safe space, just as kink communities are safe spaces for people 18+. In no way am I saying this interest can’t be SFW for those who are 18+, that’s valid!! For me, that simply isn’t my reality.

I don’t plan on deleting this account. It can serve as a time capsule of the experiences and the love that this community has to offer. Plus people do interact with my old posts from time to time and they were written as SFW, and I don’t want to take it away because I remember trying to look for niche fandom tk content and often finding nothing, so hopefully they continue to bring people joy.

I’m sure I’ll run into some of you on the other side, I don’t think I’m going to advertise my new account here just yet (it also isn’t created at the moment either HAHA). I’m not sure if I will share it here at all, so please feel free to reach out if you want to stay connected, as long as you are over 18.

To any minors reading this, I want to say I know it can be frustrating and it can feel like you’re being purposefully excluded from something. Kink communities are a beautiful thing, but the reality is there are sexual encounters that occur in those communities. And there is an age of consent for a reason, and while it may be different in different places, I feel strongly that 18 is the age that makes sense. Once you’re an adult, you’d be welcomed into NSFW communities with open arms, but these aren’t just rule for the sake of control, they serve an important purpose. They’re for your safety and also the safety of everyone in the communities as well.

I’ve felt inspired to do this for a while by some of the accounts around me. If you’re someone who’s also moved accounts, most likely you helped me realize I wanted to do the same thing. Thank you for setting a positive example and showing that it’s ok when things change.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading! Tumblr is probably my favorite platform and a lot of that has to do with the kindness and also the setting and following of boundaries. Remember to read users intro posts before following and just because it’s the internet doesn’t mean you don’t need consent. (Minors cannot give consent for sexual encounters btw let’s not forget that please) Ok I think that’s about it. Remember to have fun and let yourself be weird and freaky. The world needs more freaks in all honesty. Fuck cringe culture too, do what makes you happy and take care of yourself and your friends. Good luck to each and every one of you!

[warriorplots]

Welcome to Warriorplots!

Hello! I'm the sole owner/admin of this blog. You can call me Mason or Millie, I use she/her pronouns (subject to change)! I read my first warriors book about 9 years old & was completely smitten all the way through elementary school, though I only got as far as the end of OotS & half of the first book of AVoS. That's where I stopped for good unfortunately, so I know virtually nothing about any books after that or any super editions (save for Bluestar's Prophecy, but who doesnt know that one really?). Because of this, and a general dislike for the way the books are written, I like to lean more on things like fan comics & OCS -- that's why I made this blog! I think about these cats quite a lot and so come up with a number of ideas for characters & plots, many more than can fit in my own stories; this is where I'll share them, as well as other folks' submitted ideas!

Posts may be very slow until I can start getting more submissions. Currently I am aiming for a post every other day. Thanks for reading :]

Rules:

1- Submissions containing ableism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, elements of real life racism (canon typical cat racism is generally OK, just dont send in like. cat named Whiteheart hates all specifically black cats because they're obviously evil in their hearts or whatever) or generally any bigotry are not allowed & will not be posted.

2- Nothing NSFW in submissions. Violence and such is alright, but dont get sexual about the feral cats on main.

4- This is not a discourse blog. Do not submit anything intentionally inflammatory or discourse related. Be friends here please.

5- I will tag any triggers I'm asked to (within reason of course). Any discourse around or making fun of any tagged triggers is extremely not allowed. Please keep in mind however, I am only human; If I forget to tag something, please gently remind me. Dont start yelling unless I've repeatedly missed them. In that case get mean.

6- Submissions with things like incest, pedophilia, or large age gaps, intentional or not & romanticised or not, will be deleted. Asks telling me this rule is bad because "free speech" or "fiction doesnt affect reality" or "theyre feral cats it happens all the time" will also be deleted. I will not debate this; this is not a discourse blog, yes, but I have the right to not engage with topics that make me uncomfortable no matter how mad it makes you. Go somewhere else. Thanks.

7- Cringe culture is dead. You are NOT allowed to call anyone's ideas (including your own) cringe/lame/whatever. This blog is for funzies!

8- Crossover ideas are 100% okay, I think they could be great fun. I probably wont post any crossovers with significantly problematic media or any media that makes me personally uncomfortable though.

9- If you believe I have posted anything that breaks any of these rules or is generally shitty, please let me know!

Tagged topics (Open to edits/expansion):

-Death (#tw death /#tw animal death / #tw cat death)

-Kits being harmed (does not include regular sickness, but please let me know if you would like it to) (#tw kit harm / #tw kitten harm) #tw kit death if applicable)

-Animal harm (#tw animal harm + specific tags depending on who exactly is being harmed & how)

-Violence (#tw violence)

-Gore (extreme/detailed descriptions of wounds or gore or very extreme violence) (tw gore)

-SH/suicide (note, extreme or poorly handled descriptions of this will not be posted at all, this is only for posts that mention it casually & without detail) (#tw sh / #tw suicide depending)