#and she wouldnt find that here
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monsterbisexual · 1 month ago
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#my post#p#saw#saw iii#is that how its tagged..idk#as had been the case in the past now ive stared at thjs long enough n fucked around w it so long that i kinda hate it#but im releasing it anyway. into my blog#saw the quote on pinterest n already had the pic of her kneeling by her bed n went hunting for other ones#this is lowkey nothing but i spent time on it so w/e here goes lol#first pics are her being kinda set off by lynn saying john probs doesnt know amandas there#when shes hugging him post surgery i believe (or some other time hes not doin good i forget)#n that rly set her off n i almost included instead of one of those#one right after when john has to kinda call her off to leave lynn alone (i will make dog motif amanda post. one day)#3rd pic seems self explanatory. when we see her little room at the like jigsaw lair it always makes me go :(#knowing she probs lives there w john or wherever hes at yknow#i see her as v isolated besides her connection to john w makes that bond stronger not in a good way necessarily ofc#cuz its. not a good situation for her but like hes all she has kinda thing i think#last pic just had the vibe i was looking for n feels less right than 3rd one but idc now#after the blackmail letter from hoffman so she feels like she has to kill lynn like it said#n that clearly scared her enough shes willing to yknow murder someone even if john wouldnt approve#in the hopes that he doesnt find out she was sorta part of it w jill's miscarriage n assuming he'd want nothing to do w her then#<- there's so much going on at any given time. soap opera franchise i swear#im p sure u dont even find out til a later movie what the letter was abt or from who skdjdk#saw movies love to be like so this thing might not make sense but stick around for a couple more movies n we'll explain#or add context or a new character u didnt know was involved/alive all along#said affrctionately lol its just funny to me
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writer-room · 1 year ago
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Isn't it fun how everyone saw what terrified them most, but Nya's was so "unbelievable" that she broke out instantly? She was shown the one thing that was supposed to terrify her, make her spiral. But of course it wasn't real. It's Jay. If there's one thing she never once doubted, its that Jay is absolutely smitten, so of course he'd never forget her. What a silly thing to think, to be afraid of. She went through so damn much for this boy, and him for her, and we know how she is. Wouldn't it be petrifying if all that work, all that emotional turmoil, that clawing for love, could be forgotten just like that? Its quite a feat, really, that she can finally be confident in knowing such a fear is irrational.
It was easy to break free from such a place. It was only ever meant to scare her, and she has nothing to be afraid of. Right?
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themyscirah · 1 year ago
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Complaining abt Suicide Squad yet again but the fact that they have Waller exposing the alien community to space racist attacks and talking abt how she got to her position through deceit and being a terrible person and stuff is just. Ahsfiwueh JUST SAY YOU DONT KNOW WALLER.
Anyways literally the 3rd mission of the Squad ever (and the first framed as smth Waller picked and not orders from above) was the Squad discrediting and stopping a rogue vigilante who was only arresting POC and funneling white people into white supremacy groups (of which he was the most prominent member) in SUICIDE SQUAD #4. and it's explicitly framed as this mission being personal for Waller that she's hiding from the government bc its illegal like. Guys. Please why are we having her incite (space bc comics) racist attacks now
Also the whole "Amanda got her position through deceit and being a terrible person" NO. she KEPT her position through being shitty and playing complicated political games!!! She wasn't always that way like there is a difference and it is IMPORTANT ppl PLEASEEEE. In Secret Origins #14 we learn Amanda's backstory and she used to be a normal, caring person! Like even after she entered into working in government and politics she wasn't automatically morally bankrupt like please people. She was originally given control of the Squad by Reagan (*sigh* 80s comics...) to distract and get rid of her because she was so successful at pushing progressive social policy in Congress. Acting like she's this static pillar of evil is such a waste of her character and so fucking uninteresting and disrespectful to her arc it drives me MAD.
Like I am NOT saying Waller is all sunshine and rainbows, she fucking SUCKS (said w love <3) but like there's a human being there. It's a progression, she has a character arc like please, DC, please!!! They've fucked up Waller so bad and made her so opaque and uninteresting she can't even be the protagonist of her own story for fucks sake!
Like I don't know how many times I have to scream it until DC hears me or remembers but WALLER IS THE MAIN CHARACTER OF SUICIDE SQUAD. ITS HER BOOK. yet right now she's a cutout to be used as the villain wherever the writers please. Even in her book we get none of her perspective really displayed, no exploration of her thoughts with any kind of understanding of the role she traditionally has played and was made to play in the story.
#its like youre unable to root for her in any form. which is annoying bc shes actually awesome actually#also having her say “actually im the good guy fuck you'' w/o any actual deep analysis of her psyche or whatever while doing these things#doesnt count as development or showing shes 3 dimensional. its just having 2 dimensional waller say shes right when everyone is obviously#supposed to believe shes wrong#anyways i want real waller back please i miss herrrrrrrr#anyways hope mr john ridley has read secret origins no 14. i know its from 1987 but please guys please. my only hope#also it was a few months ago but i think they tried to push certain elements of a diff backstory in dream team and sorry but fuck that. and#any mention of another waller background like my eyes are closed sry. im a preboot truther#actually im just ignorant of most squad comics outside the original series. im gonna do a readthrough and become knowledgeable on other#stuff i just need to find time. so if im wrong then sorry if its smth factual and if you disagree with my opinion then uh sorry for ur loss#anyways shoutout to the time i had a nerd night w my one friend and she was asking me abt dc and said my favorite villains and i said waller#and silver swan. and she had a “yuck WHY” to waller and a ???? to silver swan. love shouting out my faves and explaining them to the less#informed. didnt say a number 3 but would probably be parallax ig. idk hes kind of slay. or maybe someone else honestly i like hal but waller#and nessie are blorbo level for me i could think abt them for hours#or maybe it wouldnt be parallax actually idk who my 3 would be. hes definitely up there but way below the other 2. maybe the cheetah#interpretation that i personally have. v different from the popular cheetah interpretation esp rucka vers actually. much closer to the pérez#and esp develops some subtext there surrounding barbara and the exploitation and theft of sacred cultural artifacts and pieces but also#like british colonization a lil bit#but i actually despise the cheetah that lives in my head but think shed be interesting to use narratively and see diana fight#vs the other guys who i find interesting and sympathetic and like for themselves#whereas my fave interpretation of cheetah can rot in hell#i got off topic here#blah#swishy rant#also disclaimer that w the main character ik dreamer is the main character of dream team. im talking more in general and that amanda should#always have a huge role as shes the main character of the squad and yet is treated like its villain and not its protag#sui sq
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luck-of-the-drawings · 2 months ago
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HAVNT BEEN ABLE TO DRAW ON MY TABLET AS MUCH LATELY. but i HAVE been able to doodle very much on paper while at work. so i have a massive backlog o traditional art i have yet to post. (its literally all OC stuff) to begin, please say hello to two little characters of mine, Copper and Gossamer
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#luckys original content#copper and gossamer#ive had these characters for SOO LONNGGGG and im finally starting to explore soooo many oc worlds of mine!! weeee!!!#i really wanna make the story of these two into a video game. a mystery game w lotsa puzzles#long ago. copper had a dad. and when she was 7. he vanished. she left to go look for him. and got hit by a car. she lost her arm.#she awoke in her bed with a copper arm. but in a world that just wouldnt understand something so strange. she tries to keep it hidden away.#her mother pretends it doesnt exist. her mother had become absent and strange after her husbands disappearance.#but the local makeup-selling group has been a welcome place. and 'she' hasnt stopped smiling since she joined#copper is on a quest to find her dad.he kept a lab in the attic. he was tracking alien life. he built a computer device within a suitcase#the computer can contact other people. those who were friends with coppers dad. there is also a browser(called BLINDSPOT)#the city of Midhail is a watchful one. and the blindspot is appropriately named. someone maintains a very impressive blog about aliens#that someone is a classmate of coppers. there is a girl who is always quiet and concealed.but always carrying a phone.with a spider charm.#always recording always observing always documenting. her name is Gossamer#under that first layer. she runs a celebrity gossip blog. spending her free time after school stalking and researching local celebrities#under that second layer is the Blindspot blog. one thats been documenting the supernatural strangeness surrounding the upper classes.#she runs the best resource on alien sightings and influence. copper is a big fan. in due time. the two will find eachother.#and they will embark on an impressive quest to find coppers father.#OKAY THATS ALL I GOT FOR NOW. if u guys like this one i might post more. dont normally do doodles here#if i post enough then ill ad a doodle tag. okay loveyou byyyeeee
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itissadbutitsmy-life · 1 month ago
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listen I just can’t find fault with a candy person for finding something that unexpectedly brings them joy and doing everything in their power to make it keep happening. I just can’t find it in me to blame them for wanting the approval of the person they love and respect more than anyone else, and wanting that approval over and over again, and I just straight up can’t blame james for figuring out a trick to make his princess smile and call him her hero. like, banana guards get her praise and approval and hugs all the time, but he’s just some random engineer with an easy smile and no one who wants to hang out with him after work. and she likes him so much, she wants him in her kingdom, even when he goes and does something stupid like push her out of the way of a super dangerous not-moving car, at the cost of his own life, she wants him back and she’ll bring him back and she'll tell him that was very brave and she loves him. of course she loves him. she loves all the candy people. but he figured out how to make her look him in the eyes and say it and give him material evidence of her pride. I can’t find it in myself to blame him for that. it wasn't good, i don't think he should have been left unchecked to keep going forever, but i can't blame him for wanting to keep reliving the nice thing that happened once. the really nice thing that happened once that came with material gifts. if she didn’t want to keep doing it she would’ve stopped LONG before there were TWENTY FIVE of them. before she was so fed up that she didn’t even spare him a kind goodbye or a chance to go home one more time.
like you’re not beating the dystopian dictatorship allegations. saying she was right to exile him from the only home he’s ever known with no recourse because he was acting weird. and the thing is, I just can’t find it in me to blame a character living in a dictatorship for getting himself into a situation because he was desperately trying to be happy the best way he could figure out how. I’m not saying he was right, he’s insane, but it just rubs me wrong, the idea that he is the one holding all this heavy blame. the idea that the princess is right to look down at him and shake her head firmly and turn him out in the cold. for chasing the rush that she gave him willingly, over and over, without any specific end parameters. for not being able to make friends, and doing something weird about it. he’s bored and lonely and this works and it’s not, inherently, bad. it really isn’t. it’s batshit, but it’s actually not hurting anyone at all.
#in case im not being clear. because i dont know. this is about james adventuretime.#and like. he is literally no weirder than any other candy person#i cant justify this freak (affectionate) but i also simply cannot blame him for this. imagine youre a guy in the Happy All The Time kingdom#and its goofyhappy but youre bone-numbingly bored and lonely and no one will hang out with you. youre 30 something.#wouldnt it be nice if you just had some people who Get you. well. enter This One Weird Trick. with a side of Princess Calls You A Hero.#like mann id do it all the time too dude. i dont see why pb can withhold her grace+forgiveness for checks notes. him being a lonely weirdo#who freaked out (HE DIED. HORRIFICALLY. UNEXPECTEDLY.) and found a way to ask her for friends indirectly.#is it wrong to be a weird little candy guy living in a dictatorship trying your best#like come on. sure hes not DOING RIGHT. it was WEIRD! but i CANT FIND IT IN MYSELF to BLAME HIM. that's what im here to say.#i will never find fault with him for literally just tricking her into making clones of himself so hed have friends to eat with in his home#im not sorry i mildly enjoy character on tv. candy people no.1 defender.#o#he doesnt seem to need much. like. its not like he was this extravagant strain on resources. if he was she would have noticed#ok ill stop. for now. might be back. i had a HORRIFIC discord rant#and? if he really had been dying? we wouldnt be having this conversation. we'd be saying man that is tragic. get him therapy.#but instead we are talking about whether he should APOLOGIZE for taking up space in his own tiny apartment tht he decided to share.#thats what annoyed me. among other thigns. but that bit. that she has a nebulous apology waiting for her and neednt accept#thats. insane. what did he do. not die. fake save her life. not realize heroism can branch out to other folks besides his princess.#bad things but not Obviously Unforgivable things that deserved EXILE!#adventure time#for my own search purpose just in case. I think that’s low enough in tags it won’t go into main tag.maybe not. whatever
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mistyycowoa · 6 months ago
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Confessing my sins to the internet because my irl friends don't know my tumblr
I'm actually a horrible friend and I don't plan to change :)
I'll be a good friend to anyone I actually like and I usually don't associate with people who I don't like, but sometimes there will be an occasional lonely (usually annoying) kid that follows me around. (They're lonely for a reason.) I kinda hate people who are loud literally all the time but I can hold my tongue and this kinda person just doesn't leave because they're not being told directly to leave.
What do I do? I talk to them only when I need them, I make unnecessarily mean comments as a joke, I point out their obvious flaws that I know they have a hard time changing, and all while they still follow me around like I'm not kinda bullying them.
Sometimes I'll treat them like an actual friend when I'm in a good mood, but if I'm not, then the unfortunate victim becomes my emotional punching bag. (I have ways to quickly fix my mood and this is completely unnecessary and I could distance myself until I feel better like how I do with actual friends.) I think this is like. Breadcrumbing? Anyways yeah, toxic shit.
If any of your "friends" treat you like this, they don't see you as a friend. If they leave you doubting if they like you or not, leave you doubting if you're actually friends, they probably don't see you as a friend. (because that's the case for me :3 )
I'm a horrible human being and I don't feel nearly as bad as I should about it :)
#i had a friend in primary school who was treated like this by me and my then best friend for the whole 6 years#she was very much bullied i think#we literally had a “class x girls group” and “class x girls group without (victim)” and we sometimes shit talked her in there#my best friend was a bit more obvious about not liking her#she would like be my shield anytime things got confrontational while i never stood up for myself#pretty sure she shared snacks with me a lot too and i just never returned the favour.#and now theres this boy that has nearly no friends who follow me around during breaks#just today i literally gave him the silent treatment because i was having an inner monologue and i didn't bother telling him#i even found it kinda funny that i walked around silently while he muttered to himself and questioned if he did anything wrong#like dude no you didn't do anything wrong but also i found it too funny to correct you#i have actual friends that i treat decently btw#like. without all this weird shit#i just take advantage of the loney and probably neurodivergent kids :)#moral of the story. please have more than 1 friend. especially irl. dont let them treat you like how i treat these poor “friends” of mine#ive literally never told the 2 people i mentioned here anything along the lines of “im grateful i have you”#feel free to stop being my friend because of a post like this :3#i wouldnt say i *like* being a horrible friend but also im like. not doing anything about it and not bothering to change for the sake of#these people who are already kind of outcasted and probably need someone to rely on#“im not doing charity” proceeds to refuse basic respect to these people because theyre “annoying”#you could call this a vent post#im kind of telling myself that im a horrible person to begin with so i feel less bad about “breaking character” on top of being guilty#honestly i hope this kind of person finds someone who genuinely accepts them because they deserve better than this#and also because theyre a headache for me and im sick of them
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quadrantadvisor · 1 year ago
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I started shipping Dick Grayson and Percy Jackson as a joke and then got accidentally invested. Help.
The thing about them is that I think they would Know. They would each know that the other had been though more than any one person could be expected to bear. They would feel secrets like a weight between them. And they would just. Not ask. They would decide to be eachother's simple thing. A bright spot of good in a world that's too hard.
Dick comes across as a ray of sunshine but he keeps up with Percy's snark. Percy's bleeding heart for the downtrodden and disdain for any authority endears him to Dick. They just have complimentary energies.
What makes this funny is how everyone else reacts to them.
Dick's family is panicking, since Percy is The Most Suspicious Man on the Planet. He works six months out of the year at summer camps that don't exist. He was accused of terrorism as a twelve year old. They keep trying to bring this up with Dick, who is exaggerating oblivoiusness. "What, Percy, suspicious? Never. He's great with kids, I'm sure the campers love him, isn't that sweet?" Tim is pulling out his hair.
Meanwhile, Percy's telling Annabeth (who he is still dating, polyamory ftw) all about his new guy, and Annabeth is like, "Let me get this staight. You're dating a rich trust fund kid, who's also a police officer, named Dick? That's not a real guy. That's a parody of a person. Who are you and since when do you tolerate cops."
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ajdrawshq · 1 month ago
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fascinated by mindt being found in temenos' house at night for some reason. what are u doing in here.
#temenos and mindts relationship is kind of interesting to think about in general but this certainly adds to it#like its. kinda hard to tell exactly how 'close' they are disregarding. everything that happens#judging by the dialogue of various townsfolk in flameschurch it seems like temenos is a well known and loved member on the community#which yknow. makes sense. hes a cleric. thats basically part of his job#and the children especially love him (which is why theyre mean to him lol) which is very sweet to see#but hes also. very deeply lonely#its more evident later in the game and mostly expressed in travel banters but its very much there#even before rois passing iirc#like obviously he had roi as a close friend and brother but it seemed implied that he was more. isolated from others#doubting others bc roi wouldnt#despite caring for the pontiff who adopted him he even seems to be somewhat distanced from him too#similar to ophilia. they both usually refer to their adoptive fathers w formal terms ('your holiness')#. and while i adore the parallels between the 2 octopath clerics thats not the thing im going on abt rn. anyway#that makes it kind of interesting to see how mindt seems to be making an effort to get close#casually barging in on his convo w the pontiff. asking him to write after he leaves. seeing him off. trying to act as an emotional pillar#but he immediately lies to her abt what exactly his journey is for. but he also never suspected her#not being able to account for her immortality aside i wouldnt doubt that part of that was bc she was the last maybe-friend he had there#its no wonder his anger slips there he deserves to be well and truly pissed off. he lost literally everyone he cared for in some way#hang on im looking at the cutscenes for reminders and im sad abt crick again .#ANYWAY man thats just super interesting. she may not have had temenos the same way she had tanzy#but she didnt have to really. what she did worked in the end and she ruined his entire life over the course of like 5+ years#not fully trusted but still familiar. enough that u can find her in his damn house#what IS she doing in there tho. does she also live here. is she being nosy. is this just normal for her and no one would find it weird#also mindt noting multiple times that she wished she knew what was going on in temenos' mind..#yet she already seems to know. to some degree#subjugate their hearts and minds..#octotag#octopath traveler#octopath traveler 2 spoilers#good to know thinking abt temenos still makes me feel ill
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7emperance · 2 months ago
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i hate mfs who are so genuinely-down-to-the-core-persistently-and-thoroughly pessimistic
#idk why im so vitriolic towards my roommate lately. im not gonna worry about it either i just gotta get through like two more weeks#but like she has such a skewed interpretation of ANYTHING i tell her and it makes me feel like im crazy#ive found recently that i actually quite enjoy interacting with people i dont know i just love people watching#not small talk because i cant do that but i work retail at my college so i like telling people where to find what theyre looking for#or if someone im not friends with but have class with comes through and we have a quick chat about how we feel about the book we're reading#people who give compliments and walk away people idk who go out of their way to come up to me and just say hi and nothing else and walk awa#which did happen and i loved it#but i tell roomie and shes like wtf thats so weird everyone here is so weird#like yeah it was odd but i liked it! it was sweet of her#i love people!#and i love my writing class where we dont do any formal writing and just write about our feelings#and my prof who cannot raise his voice or put any emotion into it trauma dumps about his childhood and how he wishes he could live in natur#he always gives me the most glowing over the top but genuine praise on all of my work#and he remembers that i scrapbook because i mentioned it in an essay once!#but when i tell her about all that she dont give a gaf about the compliments#bc shes so distracted by how weird it is that my prof knows that about me#we know a lot of weird people tbh.. and obv not everyone is the coolest person#but idk i think i just take issue with having such a fundemental and unshakeable belief that life is miserable and everyone is evil#because that becomes interpreting everything thru that distorted lens and not even questioning#thinking about when a guy we know came up and said hi to us.#and i heard what he actually said but roomie misheard him and thoought he said something rude#and to this day she doesnt believe me that he didnt say what she heard because she thinks hes evil and of course he would say that#(but he literally wouldnt do that. like i cant stand that guy because hes annoying not because hes disrespectful)#whatever she left for class and isnt pissing me off by burping rlly loudly rn so i dont need to keep writing this post smile :)#┈ ✴ ﹙rambling﹚
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uniquezombiedestiny · 1 year ago
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must be nice, being free for once
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penguin--person · 1 year ago
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played isat for the first time!!!:) i like it, its nice :]
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rearranging-deck-chairs · 9 months ago
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"you were born evil" but you still named her agatha.
thinking about that process, because it took 18 years right. you have a baby and you call her good and she turns out to be smarter than you, more powerful than you, and it scares you, you dont know how to handle that especially in a world that hates you and her already. the things about her that scare you, will scare the outside world who understands even less than you do ten times more. you dont know how to protect her so you try to control her which is like number one bad idea human response to things that scare us.
obviously this backfires and she gets even more furious in her quest for knowledge, every door you close she finds a window, every place you warn away from she gets into, talking to people she shouldnt be talking to, trying out magic she shouldnt be trying. every step she takes is one further out of your control, further out of anyone's control, every new thing she learns makes her dangerous, puts her in danger, puts your coven in danger, shes exposing all of you along with herself. shes in danger, shes a danger, shes a teenager and she knows more than you, of course shes not gonna listen to you anymore, about anything. of course shes not gonna hear a warning, and if she did she wouldnt take it, just to spite you.
what are you gonna do? youre not the only one whos scared. of her, for her. youve got an entire coven getting panicky about the way shes exposing all of you, the risks shes taking that she may or may not be able to fully understand (maybe shes never seen one of you burned before, maybe shes her own first). and if she were on her own that would be her decision to make, but you are still responsible for your coven and you are responsible for her, for her safety and for the threat she poses. so what do you do? do you even have a choice? or is this just where the mob turns. kick a scapegoat onto a pyre and hope fortune turns for the rest of us. if she cant stick to the rules in place for the safety of all, then shes a ticking timebomb. if it's not her at the stake, sooner or later it's all of you. so what can you do? what are you expected to do?
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punish agatha.
#dont remember who i saw say it but when agatha is recruiting sharon and she pauses for a moment before going yoohoo#making peace with the fact that shes definitely most likely gonna kill this lady along with the witches#*points at her mother here*#anyway i dont know what the fuck like went on this is just one version#but im thinking of her ghost and like 'emotion ties them to this plane' like yeAH NO SHIT fhkjhgkj#the amount of emotion that mustve been going on here#i imagine there must have been a lot of self-convincing before her mother got to this point#i imagine there werent a lot of choices and she was kind of backed into a corner and she just had to find every reason to make this possibl#to be able to do THIS#thats the only way right?#she seems to be the leader. idk if covens have leaders maybe shes just leading here bc it's her daughter thats on trial#or maybe agatha just gets it from her mother#but like if she hadnt gone first then maybe the coven wouldve done this ANYWAY without her right?#and then she'd have lost control of the coven. maybe kicked out. her daughter would be killed either way like#idk if she considered taking agatha and fleeing just the two of them. if she rejected that as too dangerous. safety in numbers#they'd get killed if it was just the two of them#or if she never even considered it. i do get a sort of.....conforming vibe from her. which isnt weird bc standing out or losing community#is p dangerous right in the environment they live here#im more inclined to imagine her trying to teach agatha to just like. shut up. hide. conform. dont stand out. whatever you do DONT push the#boundaries#bc if you end up outside of them youre fucking toast#i can imagine that more as her attempted strategy than running off with agatha#but like obviously that wouldnt work bc agatha wants to push boundaries she wants to push boundaries so bad#i get a feeling she wants to push boundaries like the doctor wants to press buttons#yaz voice: you'd hit a hornets nest just to see what happens
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werewulfbf · 1 year ago
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hi everyone I miss you 🥺
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good-beanswrites · 2 years ago
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Could I request "cooking is an art form" with mahiru and presumbly orekoto? I read your Night drabble of those 2 and now the idea of a potential friendship has been stuck in my mind for days, that was probably the sweetest interpretation of him I've seen! Mahiru can't cook in the current state she's in though so I guess orekoto could act as her hands...?
Ah thank you so much!! I was so worried about doing Orekoto justice, that's so exciting you enjoyed 😭 We still don't have a ton of characterization for him, so bear with me, but I absolutely loved writing this. Thank you so much for the request -- with food playing such an important role in Mahiru's story/symbolism, and the pair's unique relationship, this made me so crazy to think about !!!
The knife twirled through Mikoto’s hands. He brought it down with a grunt. Emotion pulsed through his veins. He went back for another swipe, much harder than necessary. He wiped spatter from his face.
“You’re making a mess.” Mahiru observed from behind. 
He glanced back to find her scowling at the tomato he was taking out his frustration on. “Who gives a shit? We’re not on cleanup duty.” 
He wasn’t supposed to be on cooking duty, either. It was Mahiru’s night according to their usual rotation, but she was in no shape to do any physical activity. Mikoto must have volunteered, and also gotten into some fight about it, because now there he stood: angry at an unknown source, full of adrenaline, and worst of all, in charge of tonight’s curry.
“I suppose…” Mahiru said. “I think that’s Muu tonight, I’ll apologize to her later.”
It was unsettling, how she remained positively cheery as she walked him through each step of the recipe, despite her current condition and his bad attitude. Not that he’d ever turn his anger on her. Mikoto approved of her, and that was enough for him. She’d been going through so much at the hands of their common enemy, he wouldn’t say a single thing against her. Even as she tested his temper with her cooking instructions.
“No, no!” With her good hand, she tugged on the side of his uniform. “You have to turn the carrot as you cut it. Like -- yes, like that!”
Mikoto rolled his eyes as he did what he was told. “It’s all going to get cooked together anyways, it’s not a big deal.”
“It is! You have to take your time with things like this.” She placed her hand over her heart. “It’s about the process, not just the final product. Cooking is an art form!”
“It’s about the final product to me. I’m fucking starving.” 
She was briefly distracted with the next set of instructions, telling him how to combine everything over how much heat. When she returned to the topic, her lighthearted voice was laced with a bit of desperation. “I mean it, there’s something magical about pouring your heart into something for someone else. Putting in your time. A little finesse here and there.”
“I know what it’s like to do something for someone else -- and there is absolutely no finesse involved. Or potatoes.” He gestured to the cut pieces before dumping everything into the pot over the stove.
“One of the most universal love languages is food, you know? People make meals and treats for their loved ones in every culture, in every time.” 
��They do a lot of other things, too.”
“You went to art school, you understand. This is an expression of yourself!”
“It’s a waste of time.”
“It’s the surest way to help someone!”
“That’s a load of bullshit.”
There was a pause. Then a nervous laugh. Then, “yeah.” As she dropped into more uncharacteristic silence, he stole a glance at her. 
Tears poured from her eyes. 
“Mahiru?” Fuck, he didn’t mean to make her cry.
“It is.” she hiccuped. “I thought… I thought it could save him. I made this big meal… I thought… But I was so stupid…”
She buried her face in her hands, offering weak apologies for the sudden outburst. He threw the lid over the pot before stepping back to her.
“Hey, hey. Come on. Don’t cry.” It was a command rather than a comfort. 
She didn’t listen. She just continued sobbing and blubbering on. “It was all stupid, worthless… I should have known…”
He crouched by the wheelchair. There didn’t even seem to be anything wrong, they’d just been talking about food. Why was she such a mess? He gave an impatient sigh. No reaction. What was Mikoto’s nickname for her again? “Listen, Mappi --”
She snapped her head up to look at him. 
Her teary eyes flicked all over his face, making him scowl. “What?”
“Oh.” Her shoulders relaxed, though her breath still hitched. “Sorry. You said… and well… I thought you’d gone away. I want you to stay.” She took his hand. “You.”
His eyes narrowed. “Why?”
“Because you understand me.” 
He did not. Like, at all. But he kept his mouth shut.
Thankfully, she was too talkative not to explain herself. “You love someone very much. That love turned out to be dangerous -- deadly. And you weren’t forgiven for it.” She pressed her lips together, suppressing the wave of emotion that almost overcame her. “And now we’re both getting what we deserve for it.”
“Like hell we are.” He felt the spark of rage again. “Neither of us deserve any of this shit, okay?”
“But --”
“No.” He glared at her. That familiar fire rose up inside him. “I’m tired of all your speeches and optimistic crap. You’re always falling over yourself for others. You’re pathetic. This place is hell, so you need to get your shit together and act like it. You might be willing to forgive the others, you might be able to treat them with that stupid sweetness all the time, but no one’s going to do the same for you. Stop letting them fuck with you.”
She gaped at him. He realized he’d leaned in very close. He prepared himself for more tears, or maybe some cowering away from him. Good. Mikoto didn’t need people like her who would convince him this verdict was deserved. He didn’t need any of these people. It was fine to push them all away.
Mahiru surprised him by leaning over. Her head rested on his chest. “It’s hard. It’s so hard, Mikoto. But… I’ll try.”
His attention was quickly ripped away by a hissing behind him. He yanked himself away from her to run to the curry, which was bubbling and burning and spilling out of the pan all over the stovetop. 
With an outpouring of profanities and clattering of dishes, he cleaned the sad remains of dinner off the burner. When he looked back at Mahiru, she had dabbed at her eyes and composed herself slightly. 
“It’s okay,” she said, “I’ll pick something easier you can make instead.”
“Nah, I’ll make more curry. Tell me how much of everything again.” 
“A-alright.” 
His agitation slowly faded as she began her gentle instructions again. Though he had just tore her apart for it, he was grateful for her patience with everyone around her. He probably could have left, then, seeing how calm the kitchen became. But he wasn’t risking ruining the meal a second time with an unexpected switch. 
And maybe Mahiru’s words still played through his mind.
The food was back on the stove in no time. He stood diligently next to it. They’d lapsed into a content silence. He still didn’t know what had set her off earlier, but wasn’t about to ask questions.
Mahiru had regained her usual bright smile. “Hey, when I get better, I’ll cook something for you, okay? I think you don’t appreciate cooking because no one’s made something special for you before. I want to do that.”
He sneered. “Heh, sure. And I’ll let you in on my preferred art form.” His words were layered with sarcasm. By now, she could guess that included destroying things by putting all of one’s might behind a powerful swing. 
But she giggled, completely unfazed. “Well, friendship is about give and take, right? I’d love to try.”
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immortalsins · 6 months ago
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computer tell me how do i love one parent who cheated on the other computer help
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sundial-bee-scribbles · 9 months ago
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having an oc story set this year is really fucked up bc i look at the calendar and i'm like "oh shit we got [character]'s death in a few days waow..."
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