#and she might. its highly probable. there has been a lot of hints for that too.

[evaglass]

Speculation about Mizu's parents pt. 6

Mizu has already killed one of the first white men, Violet. Fowler isn't going to last too long once there's no use for him, and assuming both Routley and Skeffington are in the British Isles, because I doubt the show will have Mizu relocate again farther from Japan to find her target, Mizu will most likely kill them three in season 2, and that seems a bit too easy.

Having her kill all the four white men by season 2 seems too quick, especially since the people behind the show want four seasons. It's too quick, unless there's a plot twist, like none of the four men being her father and none of them putting the bounty on her.

Don't get me wrong, they probably were involved in Mizu's mother getting killed. Remember the bird Mizu had to kill when on the mission Madame Kaji requested?

A bird flies from its nest for two reasons if a person is near, one reason is to fly away from danger. The other reason is that if the bird has eggs or hatchlings, it will try to defend its nest, like how the bird in that scene tried to do.

Look at the way the dead bird was laid out, the four white eggs that are there, almost like they're looking at the dead mother bird.

It looks like these two scenes I brought up before.

Mizu finding out her mother was the European one instead of her father will not make her happy; it will fill her with a lot of complicated feelings, especially anger, and she might even hate her mother. The worst part about it is that her mother is likely dead, and she can't enact her vengance on her mother if she's already dead. She will believe it was all for nothing.

I do think she will probably eventually find self-acceptances, especially if she finds out her mother really did love her and died protecting her. Maybe she'll even find an old diary of her deceased mother describing how much she loves her.

The revelation will probably lead to Mizu wondering who actually put the bounty on her, which will lead her back to Japan seeking answers, which will set up Lady Itoh as the final antagonist.

I already can tell Akemi is gonna have conflict with Lady Itoh, especially if Akemi and Takayoshi start developing actual romantic feelings for each other because that would make Lady Itoh lose more control over him. I highly suspect Lady Itoh is behind the death of Takayoshi's first wife, so that puts Akemi in potential danger, and Lady Itoh has no problem trying to put Akemi down with what she pulled in the dinner scene. I think the common enemy of Lady Itoh will have Akemi and Mizu ally with each other

Going back to this scene, I think there's more potential foreshadowing to explore here. I think the man who tried to kill baby Mizu was voiced by the same man who also voices the older son, Kazuyoshi, while the man who stopped him was voiced by the same guy who also voices Takayoshi. I think this will foreshadow what choices Kazuyoshi and Takayoshi will make in the future.

Look at this scene that's in the POV of Kazuyoshi before he does what his mother tells him to do, which is to lock in the Lords to die because they saw his father's shame. Look at how his mother is in front, then Takayoshi, and then Kazuyoshi's own wife is way in the back.

This may show that Kazuyoshi puts his mother first, then his brother, and then his wife last. I think both Kazuyoshi and Takayoshi will have a choice: they will either have to choose their mother or their wives, and by extent, their possible half-sister Mizu.

Kazuyoshi will choose his mother, while Takayoshi will choose Akemi and Mizu.

The show has subtle moments of sibling tension and/or drama; Akemi and her younger half-brother show the different societal expectations set for them, Fowler's backstory with his dead sister who's kidneys he had to eat to survive, the two men in the beginning of episode three could have easily been brothers, the subtle hints that Kazuyoshi and Takayoshi could end up on opposite sides later in the show, and I also possibly believe that Mizu's mother may have been one of the four white mens' sister, mostly leaning towards Routley because of the "pretty eyes" comment from Fowler.

It could be possible that Routley brought his sister with him to Japan. I can assume that Violet was the oldest of the four men, and they all came from broken backgrounds like Fowler before Violet took them under his wing. It's probably why Fowler looked so upset when he realized Mizu was the one who killed Violet. Routley could have easily been an orphan with his sister before meeting Violet and working with him.

This would mean that Routley probably agreed to betray Mizu's mother in order to keep the deal with the shogunate intact, and oh man, I love sibling angst and betrayal. It's probably why Fowler thinks he's worse in his opinion.

Now there's one more film I want to talk about. It was cited that there were a good number of films that influenced the show, the main two being Yentl and Kill Bill, another I stated earlier was also Lady Snowblood.

Now I can't find any source to claim that the film I'm about to bring up also influenced Blue Eye Samurai, but it could be possible that it did, because like Kill Bill I heard it was also inspired by Lady Snowblood

I'm talking about the South Korean film Sympathy For Lady Vengeance.

I've also seen this film. It's about a woman named Lee Geum-ja who gets pregnant in her teens and decides to run away from home and stay with a former teacher of hers who used to make really inappropriate comments about her (she was a scared pregnant teen who wasn't thinking straight, and probably thought if she came home to tell her parents she's pregnant they would have kicked her out).

Obviously, it goes south pretty quickly. The man is still a teacher, and one day, he decides to murder a boy from another class. The teacher makes Geum-ja take the fall for him due to him threatening her baby's life. She falsely confesses to the murders and spends 13 years in prison, planning her revenge against the teacher for when she is released from prison.

When she is released, Geum-ja puts her plan in motion and also finds out her daughter was adopted by a couple in Australia and was named Jenny. She goes to Australia to meet her daughter, in which her daughter threatens to stab herself with a knife if she doesn't let her visit Korea.

Geum-ja loves her daughter, but Jenny is mad at her for giving her up (she's a 13 year old kid) she expresses that in a letter, which Geum-ja reads after getting it translated and then takes Jenny to where teacher is being held by her and makes him translate her speech to her in English

The reason I bring up this is not only because of influences from Lady Snowblood from what I heard, but also the themes involving mother-daughter relationships

The complexity, tragedy, sacrifice, anger, hate, sadness, and love can all align pretty well with Mizu and her mother. Mizu will no doubt have complex feelings about her mother, especially if she was the European one, but I think under the circumstances, I've brought up Mizu's quest for vengance will shift to making her potential white father pay for her existence to avenging her mother.

One more thing before I finally finish this. I want to briefly talk about the theory that Lady Itoh could be Mizu's mother or her maternal aunt. I can see where it's coming from, and it is possible, but I can also see it being a red herring

Yes, both Lady Itoh and Mizu have smaller faces, but Lady Itoh's features are still round and soft while Mizu's are angular and sharp; Lady Itoh's face is more oval shaped while Mizu's is more shaped like a diamond. Even up close, their noses look a bit different as well.

I also think that if any of the four white men actually impregnated and killed a Japanese noble woman when they first got to Japan, they would have lost the trading deal. Yeah, Fowler killed the Shogun, but that was after 10 years of building up an army. Plus pretty poetic that they're reminded of the woman they betrayed through her daughter's eyes.

But I'm open to being wrong. Anyway, I'm sorry this was long but now I'm done. Let me know what you guys think, I'm totally open for discussion

Part 1/Part 2/Part 3/Part 4/Part 5/Part 6

[fandomwave]

"No Guys I Swear You Have To Go Out Of Your Way To Find It!" And why I don't love this take

This is about the Ha Ha funny Coffin Game which includes but isn't limited to topics of: Cannibalism, Murder, and the core topic of this little rant, Incest.

feel totally free to skip this if that's a hard pass from you! No shame in knowing what you're about including things you'd rather not engage with.

"I know what I'm about"

Good! So this entire little rant? Vent? Observation? Comes from the recent uptick I've seen of posts in the Tcoaal tag where people come in to defend the game with more or less this argument:

"No no guys the incest is really easy to avoid. You have to go out of your way to find it. The game even WARNS you that this is a bad route. Its nowhere in any part of the game beyond this. Honestly it's just not there actually"

And I get the want to defend the game as being more than 'The funny Incest Game'. I agree that The Coffin Of Andy and Leyley is WAY MORE than just the funny incest game. To reduce the game down to that would be a disservice to the writing that went into this game. Andrew and Ashley deserve way more and Numlie themselves deserves better credit than that.

h o w e v e r

However, I think it's also doing more harm than good to try and sweep their dynamic under the rug as something that is 'easily avoidable' and 'totally optional' I hate to break the news but Andrew's romantic inclinations towards Ashley are pretty obvious in Chapter 1. They certainly aren't as obvious as they are in Chapter 2, I'll give everyone that. But they are there, and to act like they aren't... Not to mention the defense EVERYONE gives so readily is that 'The Game Warns You This Is A Bad Thing To Do' is a lot more complicated than it might appear on first blush. First and foremost the 'narrator' is the one to say: "Somehow it seems like a highly questionable idea to take this route"

which imho is a far cry from "This is the bad end" "This has incest" "you are probably a bad person for taking this ending" that some seem to argue is the 'warning' you get. Secondly we should remember it isn't 'you' the narrator is talking to here. Effectively it's still Ashley first and foremost. When Ashley responds 'I know what I'm about' that is also the game showing us that Ashley knows what this means and still wants it.

Enthusiastic consent if you will

So what's the point to this little post eh?

Well I think it's doing a little more harm than good to both the story but also anyone interested in checking the game out who might actually be genuinely triggered by such topics. Tcoaal has the siblings romantic inclinations laced into the story from point A to B. It's impossible to avoid actually. You can go the entire game ignoring any acts of kindness towards Andrew as Ashley or Ashley as Andrew, and you'll always get the scenes of Andrew playing with Ashley's hair. You will always get the text informing the player that Andrew fakes panic attacks to share a bed with Ashley. You will always get the CG of Andrew's hand in Ashley's belt loops. You will always hear the voicemail 'You think you're better than me because you can fuck him and I can't' from Ashley concerning Andrew. You will always get the hints from Mrs Graves that she knows they are too close but did nothing to curb that behavior.

It is wholly unavoidable no matter what route you take. Burial, Decay, Questionable or not.

I think to argue that it's just a silly little ending you can get does a disservice to people who might genuinely be upset by that, and I think more than anything a game that is at the very least talking about incest rather brazenly deserves the warnings it earns!

I love this game to bits, anyone who's been within ear shot of me has had to deal with me talking their fucking ear off about the Sibling Abuse Simulator. I've gone on in excruciating detail how I think Tcoaal's writing has been done dirty by saying that Andrew and Ashley's romance is just a 'ha ha shock ending', comparing it to the siblings ending in something like Corpse Party (a game where the incest ending is 100% totally avoidable, and the story has exactly nothing to do with incest as a topic, and is only brought up if you trigger that ending. One where I agree with the argument that it's just there for shock value)

Anyways I see where people are coming from, I can understand the want to defend the game as more than the sum of it's parts and I agree that it does suck that this seems to be the thing everyone is hyper-focusing on in terms of it's breach of containment. I get it man, I really do. It deserves so much better than being reduced down the way it has by the greater internet.

But to say it's avoidable.. I dunno it's like taking the dragons out of Game of Thrones. The story as a whole about so much more than the dragons.. However you'd have a fundamentally different story if they weren't there, wouldn't you?

[arolesbianism]

I’ve been too tired to draw much today but then I got some midnight motivation so here’s some concept doodles for hypothetical stalien Jackie and Olivia (with some creative liberties taken)(also rambles under the cut)

Now as I’ve already mentioned the closest to their canon jobs I can give them is in the conveyor facilities, but in particular they’d likely be working at the one that’s mostly supplied by the rejects hatched at the nursing facilities owned by a different corporation that works closely with the one that runs the conveyor facilities, as that is where we find a lot more “research” as opposed to product production and engineering. Given that this would likely leave Olivia in the surgeons branch and Jackie in the data filter branch, this means that the two would have likely been trained together since they were lil kids, and likely would have been from the same hatching period. Also they might honestly be in a similar age group to Wonderful, although I’d probably more so place them as a couple years younger, meaning they’d likely not have interacted with her much until she became their new boss.

As for my notes, staliens are quite large so I of course had to scale up their heights in my mind to fit, with Olivia being very much short by stalien standards, basically just edging the point of concerningly short (basically anything under 6 foot), and Jackie being notably tall without being like stupid tall (9 foot or taller), giving them a pretty large height gap lol. The two also just have general body types that would likely give them an almost sickly look to most ppl, albeit not strongly enough that it’d draw concern. In Olivia’s case, her constantly active energy would both add to and take away from the sickly vibes due to how stalien bodies tend to react to being malnourished, with small size and overly active energy both being potential effects from two very different types of starvation reactions. In Olivia’s case, she’s just short and stressed. Stress tends to cause blood to pool at the face as a preparation for energy usage in survival scenarios, and when no energy is actually used the blood tends to just sorta leak out of energy glands. This isn’t too big of an issue for single instances of stress, but with constant stress it can become an issue if one’s body doesn’t get the hint. Due to this, Olivia keeps her energy active more often than not, both because of risk of excessive blood loss, and because she ideally doesn’t want to be bleeding all over her work.

Jackie’s energy is a pale variant, which basically means that her body has less energy in it than a typical stalien. This doesn’t effect her too much, but it does mean that she can’t rly utilize her energy in any significant manner, albeit even if she had the option I doubt she’d utilize it much due to how much risk there is for a reward that ultimately wouldn’t benefit her much on its own. She also has four antennae, which does actually affect her a bit more due to the typical stimulation issues that come with them. Thankfully Jackie isn’t the one of the two that has to work in busy stimulation packed parts of the facility most of the time, and she largely would spend her time in a more office like space, occasionally popping into the manufacturing branch to request supplies and make test build requests. Most interactions with Olivia and other surgeons would be within her own chambers, so she’s rarely having to even see the worst of things.

And lastly some light elaboration on the pronouns, blah blah blah stalien pronouns aren’t gendered since staliens don’t have gender and are instead based on a mix of status and relationships, meaning that while most have a primary pronoun, pronouns are highly situational and different staliens use different pronouns depending on who they’re talking to. Jackie and Olivia would likely use less formal pronouns when talking to eachother for example. Basically just imagine it as two scales of “formal to informal” and “negative to positive”, but with a bit more social nuance for how they’re actually used + some of them also double as like actual words so things get kinda muddy a lot of the time. Anyways, both of them most commonly use very formal pronouns as they basically live at their jobs and are interacting mostly with coworkers and higher ups. Olivia uses a slightly negative leaning one mostly to come across as more polite, while Jackie uses a very neutral formal pronoun to come across as more strictly professional, basically giving off more of a “we are here for business only” sort of vibe. They probably do or at least used to use more causal pronouns for each other in private tho, likely either going very casual positive or neutral very positive, with the former being what you’d use for very close friends, and the latter being for someone you consider a pure equal, which is funnily enough most often seen as incredibly rude to use if you aren’t extremely close to the person. Either way, I imagine in more professional settings Jackie tends to refer to herself with more formal positive terms and to Olivia with formal neutral terms, and Olivia refers to them both as mostly formal but not super duper formal neutral terms. Oh they’d also 100% have different names but yknow that’s a given with stalien language

[voyagesofthebataan]

The Vulcan and The Plant

“Enter!” “Subcommander R’nar, reporting as ordered, Captain.” “Welcome aboard, Subcommander. Captain Adamsen spoke very highly of you in your transfer papers. Come on in, have a seat. I was just watering my plants.” “Your plants, sir?” “Yeah, I have a few here in my cabin. Most are from Earth, of course, but I’m always interested in new varieties if you know any botanists.” “I know several, sir.” R’nar was a Vulcan. While Rodgers hesitated to embrace any stereotype, his own experience had taught him, if you have to have a scientist on board, make it a Vulcan. While their cold embrace of stark logic in the face of wonder came off as detachment, he’d learned personally that few people could chase a hint of curiosity like a Vulcan who didn’t understand something. Unfortunately they rarely made good conversationalists. “I’m especially fond of this one. Chrysanthemum morifolium. Florist’s Daisy. A nice splash of color and its good for filtering the air. When the first astronauts from Earth left our solar system, they took Chrysanthemum with them.” “Sir, are the air filters on this ship not functioning optimally? Do they not perform their task well?” “Well, yes, Subcommander. But its still nice to have. We don’t have as many creature comforts as a Galaxy or a Sovereign-class on the Bataan, but plants help humans feel better. Psychology is actually pretty clear on this, humans do better when we can touch grass, as it were. My first tour out of the Academy was a Miranda-class. Obsolete by today’s standards, very sleek and polished but sanitary. Not a lot of human touches. I went a little crazy until my first away mission, got to step off the ship, see sky, I even took my boots off. I had a rash for a week from some species of native grass that I’d never been around so I didn’t know I was allergic to it, but I felt better for a little while...until the itching started, obviously.” Rodgers laughed. R’nar only looked askance. “Tell you what, Subcommander. You’re going to be here for about 6 months. Do me, and yourself, a favor. Go down to science and talk to Ensign Pastor. She’s a botanist, she helps me with mine. Ask here for something...a cactus, maybe, I think she has a few to spare.” “A cactus. An interesting choice, sir, to recommend to a Vulcan.” “How so?” “Cacti are prickly and unwelcoming, unapproachable except at risk of injury. Tough and resilient, they live for hundreds of years, and often produce flowers you might describe as ‘beautiful’ under the right conditions. Given what I know of how Humans feel about Vulcans, you might call that a metaphor for our species.” “You’re probably right, Subcommander. That’ll be all.”

[sweatydelusionpaper]

before 231 i actually don’t think i considered osaragi being attracted to miko — or at least, not seriously. that said the new chapter’s latter half raises a Lot of eyebrows — and if i wasn’t already a bit convinced from just 231, the analysis you did does raise some points that make me go “hmmmm. This Definitely Doesn’t Add Up.”

basically: i do support the “osaragi’s got a thing for miko” (we’ve also seen some. gay jokes before with chika/hayasaka and nagisa, so if this were to be played with a little bit i would be pleasantly surprised but not feel like it’s super out of the realm of possibility) pretty strongly? i’d have to go looking for more evidence again and i’m not exactly sure yet how aware of it osaragi is, if she’s even at all aware, but i’d love to hear your thoughts (and others’) on the matter !

This is like my first ask and i am not gonna lie ,i let out a very ugly squeal after reading it.

Okay now to answer your question,see the only reason why i discard the theory of koba chan having feelings for miko is because i dont really see a lot of gay/lesbian representation in mainstream anime. Obviously we have the bls and yaois but its very rare to see a homosexual pairing in the other ones. Even if they are present, they tend to be very subtle about it,so you are always kind of left wondering,"Are they--are they in love with each other or just really close friends?" U know. But with that being said, since kaguya sama as a story centers around different types of love and how various people react to it and maneuver through it, there is a high possibility that we might actually get to see same sex relationships/love.

And also, with chapter 231, so many of the things would make sense if koba chan were to actually be in love with miko. For example as i mentioned, koba chan doesnt dislike miko as a person, we know that because she cried when miko was being acknowledged by her peers, was constantly by her side through the election arc and was genuinely worried for her, the same goes for the sports festival arc and the cultural festival arc. In all these chapters, koba chan never seems to look like she is annoyed or irritated by miko's presence. Its only when miko realizes that shes in love with ishigami that she starts to distance herself.

If shes really in love with ishigami, it makes sense that she would see miko as a rival. But why not tsubame? Cause she was nice to her? Cause she projected her feelings onto her? Okay. Then she says that she would be happy as long as ishigami is happy but just not with miko. Why not her? Why is she specifically threatened by her? I wouldve understood her feelings if she thought miko was a bad person and not a good friend. But thats not the truth. Because you obviously dont cry for people you secretly hate and are just forced to be friends with.

So heres what i think, as kaguya mentioned that koba chan was projecting her feelings onto tsubame, what if that was true? But instead of tsubame, it was ishigami. When she saw how in love miko was with the person who gave her the sutera flower and felt jealous, she probably thought it was because of ishigami, because of internalised homophobia and overall denial. And since then has been viewing ishigami as a romantic prospect when all along it has been miko.

One more thing i wanna add, is that in the end of chapter 231. She mentions how miko would either have to choose between her and ishigami. Now i dont know about her but if i was in a situation like her, were i was friends with someone i hated and was in love with their crush,the last thing i would ask them is to choose(although koba chan didnt literally ask her, but its our bad luck that miko overheard), i would cut ties right there and then. And miko did. So for her to still want miko to choose between them is kinda suspicious.in my opinion

Or it is obviously possible that i am overthinking this lul

[contemplativepancakes]

Geralt is possibly the least interesting vampire in the world. Jaskier is strangely okay with that. 4k, G. read on AO3 here!

for @theamazingbard (:

Geralt holds up two ties in front of the mirror, comparing the fabrics against his suit. By now, he’s used to the headless suit that reflects back at him in the mirror. Geralt’s never been one to overly question things, so he couldn’t tell you why vampires don’t show up in mirrors, but really, that’s fine. A relief, even.

He’s not sure he wants to know what he looks like. He knew once, before he was turned. He wasn’t exactly a looker then, and he highly doubts he is now.

Geralt chooses the black tie with the tiny dots instead of the black tie with the stripes, and clips it on to his suit. What? He can’t be expected to tie a tie every single day. He smooths it down over his chest. Satisfied, he sits down on the bed to tie his dress shoes. Reliable double knots.

He walks down the hall to crouch in front of the refrigerator, pulling out one of the bags of blood he keeps there. He pauses to look at the label. It’s his favorite, AB. He tucks it into his lunchbox, then pauses to rip one open and dump it into his travel mug. He pours some protein powder in it to make the blood coagulate. He can definitely see the appeal of this boba tea the humans have been drinking recently.

As he heads out the door, he darkens a little as he looks at his neighbors’ decorations. He hates Halloween. A time for people to get everything wrong about monsters. They live with them, the least they could do is be a little considerate and do their research.

No, they can’t repel Geralt with garlic. He scowls at the thought.

Geralt’s distracted from his thoughts as a young man runs by him out of seemingly nowhere and falls on the sidewalk just in front of him, his knee splitting open.

Geralt rubs a hand on his neck as the man looks up at him beseechingly.

“Uh. Do you need any help?”

“My, you’re ever so kind,” the man says, extending a hand that Geralt uses to pull him to his feet.

“Probably want to get that cleaned off,” Geralt says. “Make sure it doesn’t get infected.”

“Oh, dear! You’re right. Would it be possible for me to use your sink?” he asks, batting his eyelashes.

Geralt squints. “I...guess?”

“Oh, thank you!”

Geralt unlocks his door and leads the man into his bathroom, graciously pretending not to notice the man looking around the apartment in wide eyed fascination. He must not know that Geralt is a vampire, then, or he wouldn’t be so quick to ask Geralt for help. People around here avoid Geralt for the most part.

“I’m Jaskier,” the man says, as he bends his leg so his knee is right under the faucet. Geralt politely looks away when he notices how the motion makes the material of his pants stretch right across the seat of his ass.

“Geralt,” he replies, watching Jaskier closely for a reaction.

There’s none, so Geralt kneels down and looks under the sink for his hydrogen peroxide. When he finds it, he hands it to Jaskier wordlessly.

Jaskier flashes him a winning smile. “I guess it was my lucky day to run into you, hmm?”

Geralt doesn’t think anyone has ever said that about him before. “Anyone would do what they could to help you avoid infection,” he says dutifully.

Jaskier deflates a bit. “Well, there must be some way I can repay you. How about coffee?”

“Oh. I don’t really...drink coffee.” Geralt waits for Jaskier to get it. It’s not like monsters like him are uncommon, per se.

“How about dinner, then? A steakhouse.”

“Sure,” Geralt says, surprising himself. He blinks. His brothers are always telling him he needs to make more friends. And a steak does sound particularly good. He rarely lets himself indulge in things like that.

Jaskier brightens. “Hey, would you mind putting a band aid on this for me? I can never get it to stay.”

“I’m not sure that applying band aids is exactly rocket science,” Geralt says, but he does it anyway, his nose twitching at the scent of the fresh blood.

Geralt is centuries old, though, so it’s not like a little blood is the end of the world. Maybe when he was a fledgling, but those days are long past him.

He gives Jaskier’s knee a tiny pat. “Looks like those pants are done in for,” he says inanely.

Jaskier shrugs. “A worthy sacrifice.”

Geralt doesn’t respond to that, and Jaskier lets the silence linger. Geralt clears his throat. “I’m going to be late for work.”

Before he leaves, Jaskier insists Geralt give him his number so that he can arrange their dinner. “I’m very much looking forward to it,” Jaskier says with a grin.

Geralt gives him a hesitant smile, looking at the clock. He really does need to get a move on.

Jaskier seems to get the hint and lets Geralt usher him out the door.

In the end, Geralt’s not late, but he is grumpy that he only arrived five minutes early instead of his customary fifteen. It throws his entire day off, and the numbers seem to swim before him on his computer screen like never before.

Geralt scowls. He should have picked the tie with the stripes.

-

Jaskier contains his pout as he walks along the sidewalk, away from Geralt’s house. He practically offered himself up on a platter to be ravished, and Geralt was completely unaffected. There was blood right in front of his nose!

Jaskier doubts his information for a second, but Priscilla was the one who told him in hushed whispers that the word was that Geralt was a vampire. If Valdo had been the one to tell him, then he would have had a few more qualms, but Priscilla wouldn’t lie to him like that.

She knows how the idea of being partners with a monster makes him feel hot under the collar.

Jaskier resolves to be better. If a cut knee wasn’t enough, he’ll just have to step up his game for this dinner. And surely, if Geralt didn’t want to be seduced, he would have sent Jaskier on his merry way after bandaging his knee instead of bandaging it for him, for gods’ sake.

Maybe Geralt wants to be the one being chased after for once. Well, Jaskier is happy to oblige.

-

When Geralt gets home from work, there’s a text waiting for him. How about Friday night for our little get together?

It’s not like Geralt ever has any plans that might get in the way besides his weekly meeting, so it’s not like he has to check his calendar before he replies. Sure.

Great! I’ll pick you up at 8! :D

Geralt frowns. This doesn’t seem right. He hasn’t made a new friend in possibly fifty years, and now one literally falls into his path?

He hums to himself as he does his nightly routine, pushing on the gum above each fang to make it pop out so he can properly brush it. Cleanliness is next to godliness, and all that. Actual dentists that weren’t just going to try to pull out his teeth have only been around for less than the majority of his life, so it’s habit to take good care of them.

Geralt strips off his clothes until he’s left in just his t-shirt and boxers and climbs into bed. No, he doesn’t have a coffin or hang upside down like some sort of bat. Geralt’s not sure where all that nonsense got its roots in the first place.

There’s so many things that humans seem to have no qualms believing about monsters, though, and Geralt frowns as he punches his pillow into a better shape. He’s almost 250. His lumbar health is no joke.

-

His anxiety bleeds into his work, making Excel blink more error messages back at him than he’s ever seen before. Geralt’s boss pulls him aside to ask if he’s okay. Geralt sulks.

He is the consummate professional, and he’s not going to let this dinner get the better of him. Geralt contends anyone would be nervous if they hadn’t made a new friend in decades, too.

Now, he stands in front of his closet. He’s certainly not going to wear a suit, but he rarely wears anything else. It’s not like he goes much of any place besides work and his weekly meetings. Geralt sighs as he pulls a pair of jeans out of his wardrobe.

They’re a lot tighter than he remembers, but this is all he has, so it’ll have to do. He finds a long sleeved shirt that is luckily on the baggier side. He hopes that will make up for his too-close fitting jeans.

Geralt brushes his hair, but he can’t see it in the mirror, so there’s no point in doing anything else with it. He’s more likely to make himself look ridiculous than presentable with whatever he might attempt.

Geralt plants himself on the couch, reaching for his book to read until the clock rolls around to the time Jaskier promised to pick him up. His fingers play with the corners of the pages, bending them in a way that he’s sure would make a librarian displeased.

Geralt huffs when he realizes he’s not going to get any reading done and sets the book down on his side table. He takes a deep breath through his nose. He is ancient; he shouldn’t be getting social anxiety right now.

His phone pings with a text. Outside!

Geralt looks out the window, and indeed, there’s a car there. It’s a lime green slug bug, with rust eating its way up from the undercarriage. Geralt pinches the bridge of his nose. That looks like Jaskier’s car, all right.

-

Jaskier tries not to drool as Geralt walks down his steps. He’s wearing pants that are skin tight, which should frankly be illegal, and his shirt hangs off of him so that it shows his collar bones. Jaskier thought that vampires should be the ones who wanted to bite, but he would really love to get his mouth on one of those.

Geralt gets into the passenger seat with a half smile playing around his lips. “Like my ride?” Jaskier asks.

“I wouldn’t go that far.”

Jaskier claps his hand to his heart in mock offense. “I’m wounded.”

Geralt hums, shifting in his seat as he fastens his seatbelt. Jaskier drums his fingers on the steering wheel, flexing his right arm to draw attention to the bandage he has there. He went and donated blood this afternoon, and if Geralt doesn’t get his hint this time, he is going to pound his head against the nearest wall.

-

Geralt shifts his head to look out the window as Jaskier keeps his arms on shameless display. He knows times have changed, but it’s also always a little dizzying to see so much of everyone’s skin on display all the time, their pulse thrumming invitingly underneath it.

Geralt shakes his head to clear it of its reverie as Jaskier pulls his car into drive. It gives a concerning lurch. Before Geralt can open his mouth to comment, Jaskier is holding up a hand. “I can assure you, we are perfectly safe.”

“Hmm.”

“Hey!” Jaskier protests. “It is. I take care of it.”

“All I said was hmm,” Geralt says with a tiny grin. “That’s why it has so much rust, right?”

Jaskier sighs. “I was going to get around to repaint it, and then I just...other things came up.”

Geralt makes a face at him, laughing at Jaskier’s increased defenses. Some of his anxiety fades away as he realizes this isn’t so bad, after all. Maybe Jaskier needs a new friend just as badly as him.

When they arrive at the restaurant, Jaskier pulls Geralt’s chair out for him. Geralt gives him a polite nod. He can’t say he has a firm grasp on all the recent customs. Lambert’s always telling him he’s stuck in the past.

Geralt crosses his fingers and rests his chin on his hands as he watches Jaskier eat his salad, taking endearingly large bites. Jaskier hasn’t even mentioned anything about vampires yet. Geralt is starting to feel a tiny bit guilty. Would he still want to spend all this time with him if he knew Geralt wasn’t human?

As he’s thinking that, Jaskier takes a big gulp of his water and starts to sputter. Geralt’s across the table in an instant, his hand around Jaskier’s bicep and another hand on his back. “Are you okay?” Geralt murmurs, tense and ready to help if the need arises.

Jaskier coughs and waves him off. “Just went down the wrong pipe.”

Geralt relaxes a bit, but as his hand lingers on Jaskier’s arm, he can’t help but feel how warm it is, such a contrast to his own constantly cool skin. When Jaskier turns his face to look up at him, Geralt quickly drops his arm and beats a hasty retreat back to his seat.

He could swear Jaskier looks disappointed. He must be delusional.

When the main course comes, Geralt cuts neatly into his pink steak, mouth watering as the juices come leaking out of it. He sucks the tip of his finger into his mouth, eyes fluttering shut at the salty taste of it.

He makes himself cut the steak into tiny pieces. He’ll have to tell Jaskier he’s a vampire eventually; he might as well make sure he doesn’t think he’s a barbaric onel. Geralt tries his best to keep his eyes on Jaskier’s face instead of his arms. He can’t help but notice that he has some very nice veins. They’re a striking blue, and a perfect compliment to his eyes.

Geralt bites his lip, flinching when one of his fangs pops out on its own, pressing into his lip.

“One of my uncles is a werewolf,” Jaskier says, apropos of nothing, looking at Geralt meaningfully.

A trickle of sweat runs down Geralt’s back. Does Jaskier think he’s a werewolf? Werewolves are generally regarded better than vampires; at least they’re only monsters one night a month.

“Hmm,” Geralt says, not hearing the rest of Jaskier’s sentence.

Jaskier laughs at his own joke, and Geralt blinks rapidly until he can focus again on what Jaskier’s saying.

When the waiter comes with the check, Jaskier insists on paying for it. Is this what friendship has evolved to since Geralt last had one? He doesn’t know enough about it to argue with Jaskier, so he lets him do what he wants.

-

Outside of Geralt’s house, Jaskier puts a hand on the console between them, making eye contact with Geralt before dropping his gaze down to his lips. Geralt gives him a gentle smile, his eyes crinkling. His white hair looks ethereal in the moonlight, and Jaskier is only a little infatuated.

Geralt’s exterior is stony, but he also had no problems giving Jaskier all sorts of secret smiles throughout the night. Jaskier’s not sure he’s met a better listener than Geralt, and he tends to drone on and on, so that’s somewhat important to him.

Jaskier closes his eyes and starts to lean in when Geralt opens the car door. Jaskier opens his eyes.

“I had a great time, thank you,” Geralt says, one hand on the top of the car.

Jaskier bites his lip, stopping himself from saying what he wants. “Me, too. Let’s do it again some time?”

Geralt nods eagerly, and Jaskier watches him walk away, his gaze fixed on Geralt’s devastating pants and not at all on the way his ass looks in them.

Jaskier rests his head on the steering wheel in despair. He doesn’t know how to be any more heavy handed than this. He went and donated blood! And Geralt let him pay for their meal! He’s not sure how he can get across the point any better that he’s a talking blood bag, and he’s open for business.

Jaskier heaves a gigantic sigh and resolves to go home and plot his next move.

Maybe Geralt’s just shy.

Well. Jaskier can work with that

-

Geralt’s weekend passes in its normal fashion. He goes for a run, drinks some blood out of his supply in the fridge, then crashes on the couch for a whole day while he thinks of anything other than work. Sometimes Eskel lets himself in using his key, but he doesn’t that weekend, and Geralt crosses his arms over his chest as he tortures himself thinking of what Eskel might be doing.

Eskel’s never had problems making friends, unlike Geralt, so he’s sure he’s out having a good time with them.

Geralt used to be good at making friends, gods damn it, before all of them died of old age and he just didn’t see the point anymore. He’s come to suppose that there’s not all that much of a point in immortality if all he does is work, though.

The weekend’s over just as quickly as it began, and on Monday night, he can’t help the smile that creeps across his face when Jaskier texts him about some inane thing he noticed. Was he thinking of Geralt? That’s...nice.

Cautiously, Geralt lets himself hope that something is going to come out of this.

But first, he needs to tell Jaskier he’s a vampire. He wouldn’t be the first person to run away screaming, even though they are much more accepted now than they used to be.

Geralt shudders as he thinks of the industrial revolution. No regard for any monsters then. Humans invent light bulbs, and all of a sudden they think they’re too good for a healthy dash of respect.

Geralt looks back down at his phone, at a music video Jaskier sent him of someone playing a singing saw.

He lets himself focus on that a while.

-

Wednesday creeps around, and with it, Geralt’s weekly meeting.

He takes his spot in his customary chair, and looks around for Lambert, ignoring the look Eskel is trying to burn through the side of his face with.

“Why do I have to be here, again?” Geralt asks, when he gives up on Lambert to come save him.

Eskel rolls his eyes. It’s an argument they’ve had more than once. “If you won’t become a sponsor, you have to at least show them that things get better.”

Geralt huffs a breath out through his nose as he watches the regulars file in. There’s one new person, and Geralt eyes her curiously. She looks a little terrified, and Geralt softens in sympathy.

The meeting starts, and they go around in the circle, the seat beside Geralt still empty in Lambert’s tardiness.

“Hi, I’m Geralt, and I’m a blood addict,” he drones when it’s his turn.

When they’ve moved on to their personal struggles for the week, Lambert finally appears, dropping into his chair.

He elbows Geralt, seemingly unaware of everyone staring at them.

“Hey, what’s got you in such a good mood?”

Geralt firmly fixes a scowl in place and ignores him. He’s not sure why he even wanted Lambert to show up in the first place.

Geralt leans back in his chair, crossing his arms as he listens to everyone else, Eskel being disgustingly reassuring to them all, as per usual. Geralt stamps the jealousy down. It’s not Eskel’s fault he’s so good with people.

The meeting drags by, and when it’s finally over, Lambert doesn’t let Geralt just sneak away. He digs his elbow into his side again, holding Geralt by the shoulder. “You didn’t answer me earlier. What’s got you in such a good mood?”

“I’m not,” Geralt says.

Lambert hums. “You don’t have your usual storm cloud above your head, so I’m going to count it.”

Geralt scowls at him and looks at Eskel for back up, but Eskel just raises his eyebrows at him.

“I hate you both,” Geralt grumbles.

“You love us,” Lambert says.

“Fine. I made a new friend,” he grates out.

Lambert and Eskel exchange an insufferable look.

“What?” Geralt demands.

“You, make a friend? Well, we’re just going to have to hear all about this to believe it.”

Geralt huffs, but he tells them about Jaskier.

“He took you to dinner? And paid? And you think he wants to be just friends?” Lambert asks.

Geralt flaps his hands around and hisses, “Look, I’ve barely been anywhere that isn’t here or work in the last three decades, how am I supposed to keep up with all this human nonsense? And besides, I haven’t even told him I’m a vampire yet. I’ll be lucky if he even wants to be my friend after that.”

Eskel bites his lip. “You know that’s a turn on for some humans, right?”

“What?”

“And you said he scraped his knee the first time he saw you? Geralt, I think he already knows, and he’s just trying to get in your pants.”

Geralt deflates. That makes a twisted sort of sense. “Oh.”

Lambert punches him in the arm. “Hey, lighten up. If anyone can charm him with their stunning personality, it’s you.”

“Fuck off.”

-

It’s difficult to fall asleep that night.

-

A week goes by without him answering any of Jaskier’s texts. He still painstakingly reads and savors each one, but he can’t bring himself to reply. If he was looking for some sort of...fling, he would have gone on one of those apps Eskel keeps telling him about.

As pathetic as it sounds, he could really use a friend. And if sex came later, well, Geralt wouldn’t complain, but he just desperately needs someone who’s going to stick around. He needs someone just for himself, someone outside of Lambert and Eskel who isn’t going to tease him about every little thing.

Geralt sighs. This was at least good practice. Maybe he can try again with someone else.

His heart sinks at the thought. He doesn’t really want someone else. Jaskier wormed his way into his chest in just a week, and Geralt knows he could yank him out with only a little pain if he tried, he doesn’t want to.

Geralt wants to have something nice, for once.

-

Jaskier bites his lip as he peers out the car window at Geralt’s house. He’s half scared there’s not going to be an answer when he knocks, and he doesn’t know what he’ll do then. He thought their date went swimmingly, so he’s not sure why Geralt suddenly stopped answering him unless something happened.

Jaskier has a vision of getting into the house only to find Geralt on the floor, the only way to revive him being letting Geralt drink straight from his neck, obviously leading to Geralt ravishing him against the nearest wall.

Jaskier shakes himself like a dog. Geralt’s given him no interest in anything like that at all. Maybe he needs to lower his expectations. The dude seems lonely, anyway, so maybe he just wants someone to talk to that’s not one of his coworkers.

Geralt told him he’s an actuary, and from the questions he asked of Geralt and Geralt didn’t answer, he’s not convinced that Geralt talks to his coworkers at all.

Jaskier blows out a puff of breath as he unbuckles his seatbelt and opens the door. He’s not sure what he hopes is going to happen when he opens the door.

He walks up the door and knocks.

He waits an agonizing moment before the door swings open, revealing Geralt. He looks even paler than Jaskier remembered him, wearing a pair of sweatpants with a hole in the crotch that he can see Geralt’s plaid boxers through and a t-shirt with a collar that’s outrageously stretched. Jaskier swallows hard.

“Have you considered not oiling the hinges? I think it would do you a world of good to develop a creaky door aesthetic.”

Geralt’s forehead wrinkles adorably. “What?”

“Just, you know. Being a vampire and all.”

Geralt slumps against the door frame. “How long have you known?”

Now it’s Jaskier’s turn to be confused. “Known what?”

“That I’m a vampire!”

“Oh.” Jaskier pauses. “I didn’t think it was a secret.”

Geralt’s hand pauses in its path of trailing the wood grain of the door. “Do you have a...kink?” he spits.

Jaskier raises his hands. “Well, I wouldn’t say that.”

Geralt fixes him with an unconvinced look.

“Look, that might have been part of the initial intrigue, but—”

Geralt raises his eyebrows expectantly.

“But, you’re really fucking hot and also possibly the most boring person I know, but...I’m into it. You know all these weird facts and—gods know I could use a little stability in my life.”

Geralt gives him a bashful smile, and Jaskier wonders if anyone has said anything nice to him at some point this century. “Yeah?”

Jaskier leans across the threshold and cups Geralt’s face with his hands, their mouths a breath apart. “Yeah.”

[flickeringart]

Minor aspects

While the nature of the major aspects in astrology is quite straightforward and has been covered more than sufficiently, there’s still a lot of fog surrounding the nature of the minor ones. There are a lot of minor aspects that can be taken into consideration when interpreting a chart… however, since they are labeled minor they won’t be as obvious and much more difficult to spot in one’s own life. Note that this doesn't mean that they aren't impactful. There’s a lot of speculation and vague terms used when describing them. It seems that every minor aspect is said to have a “spiritual/creative dimension” as if that is supposed to clear up any of the mystery surrounding them. Perhaps, on one level, we don’t want to pin them down too much because certainty is the enemy of exploration. Or perhaps it’s the case that the aspects themselves don’t want to be pinned down? There’s an appeal in keeping certain things mysterious in our lives, to avoid defining and putting rigid labels on phenomena. It makes life alive and beautiful. Many people dismiss astrology is because they are afraid that they’re going to be reduced to a set of characteristics and have their personality mapped up to the point of being able to predict and foresee patterns of behavior and fated themes. The fear of knowledge is not irrational; it is probably healthy to an extent. Knowing too much can be dangerous and rob life of its magic. “Curiosity killed the cat”, as the saying goes. However, this is not the whole truth because curiosity also leads to expansion and better understanding, so let’s not be afraid to concretize these aspects, it's not the same as "killing" their potential. Life is never completely in our hands anyway, there's no risk of knowing it all.

Quintile (72°)/Bi-quintile (144°)

These aspects are said to have something to do with individual style and quality of creative work. It is suggested that these aspects say something about a mental-creative process of imposing one’s mind on a particular subject. It is also linked to talent and gifts the individual would possess that have not been actively learned. Basically, it seems to be indicative of the particular way a person would approach a subject. For example, the quintile would not describe the activity itself - the activity could be painting, knitting, running, cleaning or whatever – the quintile/bi-quintile would point to the way the person approaches the activity.

For example, Ted Bundy (whose chart I’ve explored a bit here), has Neptune bi-quintile the MC. Neptune, being the planet of illusion hints to Bundy’s quality of being a chameleon, deceiving the public as part of his personal style.

Prince Harry, (whose chart I’ve touched upon before), has his Moon bi-quintile Neptune. The Moon can be indicative of the mother figure, and his mother Princess Diana certainly had an elusive style and charm that was a bit deceptive and seductive. Of course, he would have the same thing going in his own life but it would perhaps be difficult for us to spot. He also has Moon quintile Venus and he definitely has a style/quality of emotional-physical comfort. He has Pluto quintile the AC, which would point to a style of showing up in the world that is powerful and intense. He has a tendency to come off as destructive and chaotic at times. There’s also a quintile aspect forming between Mercury in the 8th house and the MC which would hint to a public image that is colored by the “taboo” things he has said about his family in the recent present, but also in the past. He’s a public image that is aligning with the style of the playful amoral trickster.

As I’m going with charts I’ve already explored, let’s look at the quintiles in Meghan Markle’s chart. Her Venus is quintile Uranus and it perfectly describes her style of “wokeism”, that is, appearing to be objective and intelligent about feelings and affective values. She has a style of being “the loving humanitarian”. Whether she is this way in an actual sense is debatable. The quintile aspect is describing the quality and style not the actuality. But, it is disturbingly close to reality that it somehow becomes reality. It’s like the actor who adopts another energy signature in order to portray a different person. It doesn’t really matter if a person is rotten at the core - if he has a loving way of being, what difference does it make? The style is real enough to not reflect and give the impression of love.

Semi-square (45°) / Sesquiquadrate (135°)

These aspects are said to precipitate events. The nature of these two aspects is more immediate than the square aspect (which causes tension and doubt and needs constant navigation). The conflict represented is usually unconscious and is therefore not easy to identify. However, as these conflicts tend to manifest quite abruptly, we can take a look at the concrete problems the person faces. The planets connected by a semi-square/sesquiquadrate aspect will be in conflict but force some kind of release (that may result in an accident because of it’s autonomous/unconscious function).

I have Saturn sesquiquadrate my Moon. Since I tend to unconsciously block my emotional responses, the pressure builds and I am “forced” to get out of a situation, “forced to listen to my emotions”. I have encountered the theory that the sesquiquadrate in particular is manifesting as something that is looked down upon societally. This would make sense considering the aspect forces a breakout of one of the planets and nothing that is immediate and abrupt is ever favorably looked upon when it comes to social-societal structure and predictability. I have been meaning to take on commitments that would further my status in society in terms of formal education (Saturn in the 9th conjunct the MC) but I have not been able to do it without considerable decline in my emotional well-being. So, I have been “thrown out” by unconscious forces every time I’ve tried.

My sister has her Venus sesquiquadrate Saturn. She’s known for her deliberate and strategic way of dressing. She plans her outfits carefully, there’s nothing haphazard about the way she presents herself. However, she has Lilith conjunct Venus so she can push the limits and simply do what she pleases sometimes as well when the pressure of Saturn becomes too much. But, this often causes external judgment. A relative of mine has her Sun semi-square Venus. I can tell that she’s highly aware of her appearance. She is very pretty but there’s always something that is a bit off between what she wears and her self-expression. It’s like it doesn’t quite fit and it’s irritating.

To get back to the celebrities, Meghan Markle has Neptune sesquiquadrate Mercury. Is it possible that this forces distortion and vagueness in opinion and communication? It would certainly fit the bill. She also has Uranus sesquiquadrate Mars. She simply has to “break out of her confining situations”, cut people out of her life and move on in her own way. Uranus is also sesquiquadrate her MC, which seems to point to her unconscious pull to “do what she wants to do” at the detriment of her public image and reputation. Notably, Uranus sits in her 5th house of personal enjoyment and creation.

Prince Harry has a semi-square between Mars and Pluto. When he is angry it blossoms into rage and he can’t see straight. It has gotten him into quite a lot of trouble and societal-social disapproval. It seems that this is a common theme with the sesquiquadrate and semi-square. He also has his Moon sesquiquadrate Jupiter. Isn’t it the case that he tends to indulge in a way that makes him look bad in society?

Quincunx (150°)

This aspect is typically found between planets incompatible by element and mode. Basically, they have nothing in common and have a hard time cooperating, which will cause minor stress in the individual because of necessity to work around the incompatibilities. The planets are not in direct conflict but they are uncomfortable with each other.

For example, I have my Moon quincunx Mercury. Every time I sit down to write I’m mildly disturbed by little things like an aching back, a headache, restless legs or whatever. It’s not very comfortable for me but I can still keep with it, however it might take a toll on me health wise. The quincunx has been related to health issues because of the mild stress that it causes. It is manageable and one is usually able to cope with the stress, but it’s not very pleasant. Because it is not as demanding as more disturbing conflicts in one’s life, it’s in the background causing irritation.

Meghan Markle’s Venus makes a quincunx aspect to her MC. This suggests that she has a hard time reflecting her value on a public level, it’s as if how she’s perceived publicly disturbs her sense of ease and comfort. She has an Aries MC with a Virgo Venus and she’s continuously depicted as a bully these days, as some kind a selfish and aggressive bitch (the more negative attributes of Aries). This must be undermining her self-worth immensely, however, it’s perhaps too minor of a problem to do anything about. It is still there nonetheless, harping on in the background, breaking her down and causing slow disintegration…

Semi-sextile (30°)

Planets forming semi-sextile aspects are said to be able to aid each other, to have a better connection than if they had no link at all. Usually one planet is in the sign that comes before the sign of the other; in other words, a semi-sextile might be forming between Mars in Aries and Venus in Taurus. The semi-sextile usually connects consecutive sign like this, but planets could be in semi-sextile in the same sign, like Mars in 0° Taurus semi-sextile Venus in 30° Taurus. In any case, the planet placed at an earlier degree or in the earlier sign can draw on qualities of the planet in the later degree or the later sign and vice versa. For example, Prince Harry’s Venus in Libra is semi-sextile his MC. He can draw on his sense of harmony a diplomacy to benefit his public image. His Mars in Sagittarius is also semi-sextile his MC, which makes it so that he can draw from his Martial qualities of energy and action to influence his career and success.

Parallel/Contra-parallel

These are called aspects in declination because they are measured by latitude and not by longitude. This essentially means that two planetary bodies can aspect each other in a certain way measuring the distance between them north-south of the celestial equator. Two planets at the same degree north and south of the equator form a parallel aspect and can be interpreted the same as a conjunction (some say that it's more obscure like a quincunx/semi-square). Two planets opposite each other north and south form a contra-parallel aspect and can be interpreted as an opposition (some say that it's basically the same as the parallel though).

I have found, looking at my own chart that these aspects only confirms already existing aspects measured by longitude or it confirms the sign that a specific angle is in. For example, my MC is in Aries and it is also parallel Mars. Mars is the ruler of Aries so it emphasizes my already martial MC. My Sun is conjunct Saturn and it’s also parallel Saturn. My sister has a Scorpio MC and it’s also parallel Pluto, the natural ruler of Scorpio. For example, my sister has a wide Moon-Mars conjunction (6°) but they are also in contra-parallel. How is this supposed to be interpreted? I would simply see it as Moon-Mars is connected strongly despite the orb being a little wide with the conjunction.

However, it’s not always the case that parallel and contra-parallel aspects only confirms already existing influences. They can also add themes and connections. My sister doesn’t have any longitude aspects between Saturn and Uranus but they are contra-parallel to each other.

Septile (51.43° - a 1/7 of the 360°)

It is said to indicate a hidden flow of energy between the planets involved, an inner sensitivity to the spiritual dimension of the planets. Another description I have come across is that the planets “darkly interact” and there’s an occult theme surrounding the connection.

I have Venus septile Jupiter in my own chart. Going by the said method of interpretation, it would mean that I have sensitivity to the hidden wealth and underlying beauty and abundance in life. I think it is quite accurate.

Novile (40° - 1/9 of the 360°)

Is said to be describing a contact of perfection/idealization. It also seems to have something to do with spiritual awakening and growth, lack of fear and freedom.

Having Sun novile Saturn for example could be interpreted as a feeling of communion with the world and life itself through responsibility and the control one can exercise through self-expression.

----

There are of course other minor aspects to explore, but I'll stop here for now.

[doyouknowhowtowaltz]

Please, I must know about your Addams Family AU, my curiosity keeps me up nights

Bear in mind there's little in the way of story put together right now, so I am going to throw down the notes for this au, and a lot of really early sketches.

Meet the Addams! (A break for your convenience because this is long as hell)

- Enoch, Beast, Young Lorna, Whispers, and Adelaide Addams make up the Addams family (in addition to Pumpkin (cat) and Turtle (Dog)

- Beast is the only blood Addams in the lot, and is heir to the Addam's fortune, his living relatives are distant, most don't even share the family name anymore, and all immediate family have been dead and dust for at least a decade.

- Both Whispers and Adelaide are sisters that married into the family and have been since widowed

- Enoch is married into the family (Through Beast, who else)

- Lorna's specific relation to the family is never specified, everyone is Auntie and Uncle, as far as the town is concerned, she's everyone's niece. Its also highly debated if anyone in the family actually knows where Lorna came from.

- Enoch and the Beast are exactly in love as Gomez and Morticia,

- Enoch somehow has even less inhibitions about showing it than Gomez

- Enoch is friendly, the neighbors love him, thinking he's the most normal one of the bunch despite his... unconventional dressing. Strangers who are new to the family normally latch onto him when faced with the... oddity of the rest of the family.

- One problem with this, Enoch isn't a man. He's man-shaped... barely. Enoch's eldritch nature is continually hinted at as part of a long running joke in this AU about Enoch being the normal one despite making no secret of the fact he feels terribly limited by two arms.

- (This is the version of Enoch that made me enact the Rat test)

- There's a rumor running around the neighborhood about a black cat that calls itself Providence and will strike up a conversation with you if you greet it politely.

- Enoch, of course, denies any connection.

- Enoch, weird as he might be, and off-putting as he is on second meeting, does actually have a lot of friends in town, some as odd as him and some perfectly normal average humans who are undaunted in the face of his family.

- One such individual is Miss Clara Dean, who is a finance lawyer for the Addams, and while she might have been shaken when she first met them, she's well past gawking at their odd home and traditions now

- His human glamor is tied to his bolo, I will not elaborate

- Enoch runs for mayor every opportunity, he never wins, but its always by thinner margins than should really be possible

- Adelaide never took her husband's last name, making her the only Addams who's not an Addams.

- She's fussy about the night air, dreadfully superstitious, and quite spiderlike, right down to a colorful web she keeps. She would have married Beast if he had shown a flicker of interest in him.

- She can divine the weather and sometimes says strange things about blue birds and curses

- She doesn't get out much, the neighbors don't know much about her, but all the neighborhood kids agree, she's definitely a witch.

- Whispers is very kind, and if you get past the initial shine on Enoch, probably the most normal of the family

- Except that she eats animals live

- And is also a witch (Probably, definitely, the neighborhood kids all agree, she's gotta be they insist.) Between her and Enoch they are the most out and about members of the Addams family.

- Lorna is quiet, shy, very sweet

- And she eats people.

- She also has a drowned ghost routine she likes to practice on door to door sales people by climbing out of the well in the backyard to give them a scare.

- Lorna's teachers are concerned by her behavior and encyclopedia knowledge of anatomy and torture, but are more concerned about calling a parent-teacher conference, since the entire Addams Clan will show up.

- Lorna sleeps under her bed instead of on it, Whispers occasionally frets about her waking up and knocking herself against the baseboards of the bed, Beast waves her off telling her its perfectly natural, at her age he was sleeping in a coffin.

- She of course ends up with Wednesday's classic noose braids at some point, courtesy of her uncles usually

- There's a red-haired girl who's tough as nails and maybe a little rude about Lorna's family who has been steadily hanging out with her, eventually Beatrice's mom invites the Addams over for dinner, it goes well all things considered.

- And that brings us to Mr. Addams himself,

- Beast wasn't christened Beast, but he hardly remembers the name on his birth certificate anyway.

- Sporting a stunning hat-veil constantly, and a floor length dress (Always black, only black maybe some red, sometimes a little blue and yellow), its safe to say no one in the neighborhood knows what Beast looks like, even if he did ever leave the Addams manor.

- Which he doesn't.

- The nicer gossips muse that he's agoraphobic, and the ruder ones say he's batshit and they're frankly glad he stays inside.

- Beast isn't inherently rude... most of the time, but he is incredibly disconcerting, and gives complements like a serial killer. Which does not help the numerous rumors that surround him and his family.

- He sings too, roaming the woods on the Addams property at night, and he's responsible for a fair few ghost stories.

- And his garden, its a bitter grey thing, and its almost artfully... decrepit, decorated by ornamental trees with grey-orange leaves and bark that almost looks like screaming faces. And his rose bushes, they're his pride and joy. They are so high maintenance though, when they bloom, he spends hours cutting their heads off.

- Every now and then, someone comes to the house, a door to doors salesman, a child on a dare, someone chasing stories of the Addams Fortune.

- All's well and good unless they manage to break into the house. Sometimes they get tangled in Adelaide's traps, sometimes Whispers finds them and ushers them out the door with an ominous warning, sometimes Lorna scares them out of the house and works herself into a giggling fit. Sometimes Enoch finds them, and he's all politeness and veiled menace.

- Oh, but heaven help the fool who gets found by Beast.

- I think that about wraps it up!

Something something cats on leashes, they're grossly in love.

[alpacaparkaseok]

Working Overtime

requested by @thecaffeinatedscribbles​ - thanks for requesting! a picture of your request will be at the bottom of the post!

Pairing: BTS x reader

Premise: A freak storm forces the biggest band on the planet to spend the evening seeking shelter at your small cafe. Of course, you can't complain about having to work overtime.

"...remain indoors for the rest of the evening....further notice....stay safe everyone!"

You can't help but groan, the sentiment clearly reciprocated by Benny, the cook at the small cafe you work at. The two of you came to work expecting to be kept inside for a while - just because a storm was brewing didn't mean you got a free day. Chances were that customers might decide that the best way to spend the hurricane-like day would be at their favorite restaurant.

Well, their favorite clearly isn't this one. The cafe is completely barren, leaving both you and Benny to lounge around. Just waiting for the storm to pass.

Benny dug up an ancient radio from the supply closet, and spent thirty minutes tuning it before finding a station. The two of you have taken up two stools at the front counter, head down on the table while the staticky radio picks up every other sentence. "Well Bill, it looks like...that's right, Sharon, I was thinking the same-"

You'll never get to find out just what it was that Sharon and Bill were thinking about, because suddenly the front door flies open, nearly tearing itself off its hinges.

Both you and Benny turn around in shock, nearly slipping off your chair as you get a look at whoever these strange newcomers are.

It takes a few moments before they all file in - there's seven of them - and slip their hoods back.

It takes another moment before they manage to get their hair out of their face enough to actually identify them.

"I'm so sorry about that," Kim Taehyung apologizes as he throws his body against the door so that it will close properly. "We just saw that you guys were open-"

"Nobody else is open on this entire block," Park Jimin finishes, currently struggling to brush his fingers through his hair like he usually does. It's a bit more difficult now that it's been through such a windy atmosphere.

You and Benny exchange a look, clearly at a loss for words at the strange development. Together, the two of you let out a wry laugh.

"What are you boys doing out right now?" Benny asks, rising from his seat and motioning for them to hang their coats on the coat rack.

Everyone immediately turns to look at Jungkook, who's cheeks turn a little red even as he laughs.

"Someone wanted to see how windy is was," Seokjin drawls, glaring daggers at the youngest member of the group.

"And you willingly agreed!" Jungkook defends, pulling a laugh from you.

Huh.

They're just like the other boys you've met.

Silly. Irrational. Blindingly beautiful.

"Could we get you anything to eat?" You ask, slipping into waitress mode. "It sounds like you might have to be here for a while," you tap the radio, scrunching up your nose as a bit of dust flies up.

The boys settle down in the middle of cafe, pulling a few tables together. You place some menus before them, marveling at how they seem to bicker like your family.

They place their orders - enough to feed a small army, which, you suppose they are. You head back into the kitchen, prepared to help Benny with the order. However, you're a little surprised to see Seokjin and Yoongi trailing you, with a nervous Jungkook behind them.

"Oh, did you want something else?" You ask, smiling brightly. The two oldest members of the group chew on their lips, sparing the maknae a glare.

"Actually," Yoongi begins, his cheeks reddening, "Is it alright if we help with the order?"

You blink, unsure of what to say. "...what?"

Jungkook jumps into the conversation like an excited puppy. "Well, it's just that it's going to be a lot of food and it's just the two of you..."

"We're bored." Seokjin injects, laughing to himself. "Let us help you?"

Shrugging and praying that your boss won't decide to fire you over it, you lead them back into the kitchen. Benny grins when he sees the four of you.

"Come to learn from the best?" He boasts, his round belly proof of his amazing cooking skills. "Grab an apron, wash your hands. Prepare to learn, boys."

You cackle as the three highly successful (and blindingly beautiful) idols follow Benny's instructions, chattering excitedly between each other.

It only takes a couple of minutes before the rest of the group appear at the doorway to the kitchen, watching on with curiosity.

"Care to join?" Benny invites. You stand off to the side watching with endless amusement.

Taehyung joins in with glee, while Namjoon, Hoseok, and Jimin hang back. They look to you hesitantly.

"Could we actually help you bring the dishes out?" Hoseok asks timidly.

You smile. This has got to be the best shift ever.

"Yeah, if you want to. Want to come watch the kitchen go up in flames with me?" Jimin bursts out into a fit of laughter, pointing at you with pride on his face. "Oh, she's funny!” He walks over to you, leaning against the counter.

Namjoon and Hoseok follow suit a moment later, giving you kind smiles as they take up the spot next to Jimin. 

“We’re so happy you guys were open,” Hoseok comments, watching with a bit of apprehension as Jungkook tries to copy Benny’s movements. “I seriously thought we were going to die out there or something.”

“Agh you’re so dramatic hyung,” Jimin says, rolling his eyes. “But it is pretty bad out there. When do you think it’ll end?”

You shrug, stifling a laugh at Yoongi’s expression of long-suffering as he fields Taehyung’s questions.

“I’m not sure...probably not for another couple of hours, though. It’s going to be a mess trying to get home I bet.”

“Mmm.” Namjoon leans forward so he can see you properly. “Care to eat with us when the food’s done?”

Try as you might, you still end up blushing. “That’s alright, I don’t want to intrude on your meal-”

“I’m already making your food!” Jungkook shouts from where he stands watch before the oven. “Or...Jin is, I guess. But I’m making sure it doesn’t boil over!”

You give a shocked laugh, dropping your head in your hands. “I guess I will, then.”

Together, the four of you watching from the sidelines being to commentate every move that’s made within the kitchen. 

“Oh, that was a bad move Yoongi,” Jimin chides. 

“Shut up,” Yoongi responds, not even looking over.

Jin nearly drops a potato, earning quite the reaction from you. “Kim Seokjin, if you drop that potato so help me!” 

Everyone in the room pauses for a moment, Jin looking over at you with wide eyes. A moment later, they all dissolve into a fit of laughter, Jin making a show of setting the potato down with car.

“Better?” He asks. You nod.

“Much better, thank you.”

In the matter of an hour, you’ve made yourself completely at home with these complete strangers. Benny begins making more food, getting overly-excited at having willing students. Time drags on, and eventually you all ditch the idea of eating out at the tables, opting to hop up on the bar and watch the chaos unfold.

“How long have you worked here?” Jungkook asks with a mouth full of food. He ditched the kitchen a few minutes prior, deciding that it would be better to eat than learn. Hoseok replaced his presence in the kitchen.

You blow on your soup before taking a bite. “Umm...a couple of years? It’s been a good college job, I think.”

They nod along, watching at Jin wanders over. He makes a show of looking exhausted, leaning up against the opposite counter. “Is the food good?”

“Delicious,” Namjoon says.

“What do you want to do when you make it out of here?” Jimin asks.

You frown, looking down at the counter. “I...I actually really love graphic design. I don’t know, I just think it’s the coolest thing ever. There’s so much that could be done with it, too.”

When you look back up again, you find Namjoon and Jimin locked in a silent conversation. A second later, they look back to you with smiles. 

“What?”

Jimin shrugs. “Nothing. Graphic design is cool, don’t you think, hyung?”

Jin nods weakly, eyeing your soup. You take the hint, blowing on the spoonful you have. “Want to try it?”

He looks at you a little sheepishly. “Can I? Is that too weird?” You shrug your shoulders. 

“It’s a weird day. Might as well go for it.”

That’s all the motivation he needs.

The storm doesn’t let up for a long while, but you’re kept busy with the boys. They all take turns in the kitchen except for Namjoon, who claims that he’d be more harm than help. 

Together with Namjoon and Taehyung, you turn up the volume on the radio. The static makes it hard to understand, but you hear enough.

“subsided for now...remain cautious, but the worst is over.”

You let out a shout of excitement, pounding the table. Taehyung jumps a bit, laughing. “I think the storm is ending!” 

Benny hardly hears you, but the boys do. They also shout with you, except for Namjoon who suddenly receives a phone call. He’s on the call for all of thirty seconds before it ends. 

“Hey guys, that was Sejin...we need to head out.”

You frown, but try not to let it get to you. “Thanks for hanging out with Benny and I.”

The boys each take their leave, thanking you and Benny profusely. Jungkook hops on his feet as Benny fills a couple of takeout boxes for him. They quickly exchange numbers with the two of you, vowing to return soon.

“We’ll just put you in our group chat, alright?” Hoseok says, typing away at his phone. 

“How much do we owe you?” Yoongi asks, grabbing his wallet from his back pocket. Both you and Benny immediately wave them off. 

“Nothing,” Benny declares. “Thank you for keeping us company. That was enough.”

“Really, let us pay you-”

“You guys need to get going,” you interrupt, smiling at Yoongi. “Really, don’t worry about it.”

They leave, grumbling the entire way. Once the door has closed behind them, you and Benny exchange looks. 

“That was...”

“Freaking awesome,” Benny finishes for you. You chuckle. 

“Yeah, it was.” Sighing, you slip off of the bar. “I’ll put the chairs up and then come help you clean up.”

Benny waves you off. “I don’t have much to clean, Hobi did most of it.”

“Oh-ho, you even call him ‘Hobi’!” Heading into the dining area, you go toward the table that the boys were originally going to sit at. Something catches your eye before you can put the chairs up.

“Benny!” You shout, hands shaking a little as you grab the paper. 

It’s a note, hastily written but legible. 

Thank you for the meal and new friendship - please confirm the Venmo request we send to you. All the best: Bangtannies

Almost as though timed, both your and Benny’s phones chime. You gawk at the ridiculous amount of money, but you nearly burst into tears at the text message that follows it.

Bangtan: This is the number of the head of graphic design at Bighit. They’ll be in contact with you within the next couple of days - keep a lookout for it!

masterlist

[faroreswinds]

Lots of anons for Three Hopes

I'm not one for schadenfreude but r/edelgard has been going through a meltdown since the leaks started (after initially being smug about the Claude Edel handshake) and it is DELICIOUS. Like literally the game goes out of its way yo tell you Edelgard is imperialist. And ato one point she teams up WITH rRhea. I love it.

I saw, lol. It went from “HAHA WE WIN” to “WTF IS THIS SHIT” very quickly. 

And don’t get me wrong, I’m also “wtf is this shit” in some places too, but not because I’m trying to gain some victory. 

Apparently the German reviewer said Azure Gleam felt short/the ending was abrupt, but tbh I’ll take a rushed ending over total character assassination any day

Yeah, I saw that. And some other reviews have said that GW feels a little confusing on the politics and that SB barely touches on the Slithers. So, sounds like some bad writing might be heading our way again.

I heard people saying its a golden ending because the slithers are defeated and all the lords survive, but then I heard it’s not because war after the story is still implied (and all the fuckery involving claude and rhea, rhea can NOT catch a fucking break and the edelstans/khalidstans will eat that shit up), and it’s getting to be quite confusing! All I know for sure is that the discourse will get even worse and will truly show that 3houses/hopes have the worst fire emblem fandom experience

Oh, the fire has already begun to spread. It’s bad, anon. 

So, there is no “golden” ending. There is a secret ending, somehow unlocked, where Arval is killed. And the lords agree to a truce. A temporary truce, mind, because apparently there are hints that this truce won’t last. 

I highly doubt the blame will fall on Dimitri, dude literally is just “get off my lawn, I’m busy” embodied. 

Deathly curious, but where are you finding these leaks? I'm particularly curious on the supports and support lists.

There are a few data mines so shift through. 

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1m4xHogOjhfdRYywACT-ZHuexdiskAkPSE45soei5zeQ/edit#gid=146160821

https://mega.nz/file/vU5ESBwC#u5zwtxjC8ktoJOH-2q4wDJkexsBgplHtHr_g_4_wA5w

Enjoy.

So if we execute Jerry, then Leonie will be alright with it??? No, I have to believe that she leaves on the spot, as you kill her idol. I already remember how pissed she was when "Monica" does that.

Yeah, I’m not sure how that will work yet. Good question, to be honest.

They will probably make some bullshit up.

wait wait wait WAIT!!! In that little Dimilix blurb you posted am I supposed to take it that Felix was giving Dimitri a piggyback ride back to his bed?! Based on Dimitri saying his legs are dragging, Felix complaining about his height, and the tidbit of Dimitri carrying Felix once as kids it all suggests Felix is carrying Dimitri. That is both incredibly hilarious and ridiculously adorable!!!

Life is GOOD ANON, IT’S JUST ALL I EVER WANTED OUT OF LIFE HERE. 

Much bliss.

Does it say yet why Claude wants Rhea dead so badly in GW? He didn’t like her (at first) in VW but in Musou he’s outright willing to invade another country to kill her

We haven’t found out why yet. It’s still a big mystery. And a sad mystery. 

Like how you can play with both the GDs and BEs in SB/GW because of Edelgard and Claude teaming up, do you know if any of the BLs are recruitable to the other routes?

The BL’s are the least recruitable. Of the students, only Ashe and Mercedes can be recruit. Ashe all routes, Mercedes only to SB. 

It seems all the GD will just mass join the Empire at a certain point, likely due to Claude teaming up with Edelgard. However, the same is true for BL - the GD mass join Dimitri EXCEPT Lysithea and Leonie (BE recruits only). 

So if you like Felix or Sylvain, or even Annette, BL is the only route for you.

Now there is a “memory” battle type thing where you can replay any map with any character, but that’s not a “canon” way to play. Just for fun.

[thefirstknife]

We obviously don't have any real answers, but for idle speculation: what do you think Crow is on Venus for? I've seen people suggest Vex or Ahamkara reality-warping, but Crow doesn't seem depressed or angry enough for that.

Honestly my biggest question right now. I'll be a little unhinged in this post so bear with me.

Option 1, he wants to be isolated and it's been established that there are no authorised Vanguard operations on Venus so it's the most likely barren but available celestial body in the system. Going beyond the Reef is dangerous and the only thing left in the inner system that isn't yoinked by Darkness or occupied is Venus.

I think this is the most benign and basic explanation that makes the most sense for now until we know more. The rest under the cut:

Option 2, speaking of that same lore I linked, two other people went to Venus for an unknown reason: an unnamed Hunter (with an Eliksni friend) and Shayura. The Hunter was guided by the Eliksni to a part of Venus that didn't belong to the Ishtar Academy:

Hurrying up a shallow set of rubble-strewn steps, a short Eliksni bearing the crest of the House of Light pauses, gazing back at the chrome-armored Guardian moving up the steps behind him. The Eliksni looks the Guardian up and down, then motions to the stark silhouette of a gray concrete-block building rising up from the Venusian overgrowth.

"This ain't the academy proper," the Guardian says on ascent, watching the hazy sky for signs of danger. Moisture clings in glistening beads to his reflective mask; his dark hood shields him from the rest of the elements. "The hell was this place?"

The Eliksni tilts his head to the side, four eyes blinking independently from one another. "Not Human, don't know. But machine inside."

I'd assume that the Eliksni would know if it was a Vex structure, but he only specifies that it isn't human. He mentions "machine inside" which can refer to the Vex taking over, but the structure doesn't seem to be of Vex origin or the Eliksni and the Hunter would be able to recognise that. It's not exactly hard to notice their work.

Shayura came to Venus to find someone. We don't know who. It might be the Hunter in the lore (whom she killed), but it's never specified. The only thing specified is what her Ghost says:

"There are no sanctioned Vanguard operations on Venus at present," the Ghost clarifies, pivoting its cold blue eye up to its Guardian. "Why do you think he's down there?"

There's an implication that whoever she's looking for is known to work or has worked with the Vanguard.

I wonder if Shayura's Wrath lore is chronologically in order or not. Because if not, Crow would fit the description of who she's looking for. Worked with the Vanguard, went to Venus, is easily on Shayura's list of people to kill given his past.

But why would Crow be there in the first place? Maybe it has something to do with the structure described in Shayura's Wrath lore. Crow didn't fully leave the Vanguard, he just got reassigned to work with Lord Saladin in negotiating with Caiatl. Caiatl is hard at work fighting Xivu Arath's forces and the Hive in general. She even implied being willing to nuke the hell out of the Reef to kill Savathun, civilian casualties be damned. Thanks to Zavala, this plan was nipped in the bud.

So my question then would be what is Crow doing on Venus as a part of that assignment? What is on Venus, damn it? Oh, dunno, maybe... Hm.

:) ?

Remember, Venus became a jungle world after the Traveler terraformed it. Now, the problem with the Venus look is that the screenshots are only from D1 and those are old. But the jungle, overgrown look with a lot of foliage is there:

A better look might be from concept art:

The question here is: is Savathun's throne world located somewhere in the physical world or is the jungle around it just a part of the throne world itself and the actual location is elsewhere? I lean to the former and if she wanted to hide her throne world entrance somewhere, where better than on an abandoned world of Venus.

Furthermore, Bungie already reworked Venus for Destiny 2, due to Vault of Glass. The textures are there, the loading screen is there, orbit look and music, everything is already transferred to D2. Would be a shame to only have it exist as entry to Vault of Glass. Now, I don't think this necessarily means that the entirety of Venus will be back, but some other smaller part of it, perhaps. There's been a lot of Venus mentions lately, starting from it literally being back as a part of the raid.

For more unhinged hints: Venus is highly sulfuric, something which is mentioned in most lore about Venus, including this week's mention of Crow being there. Witch Queen Warlock armour features many references to sulfur:

"S" is the symbol for sulfur, 16 is its number in the periodic table and 32.066 is its atomic weight.

Venus is also symbolical for Savathun. Venus is the only planet named after a Goddess and all of its features are named after Goddesses, of which three appear in Destiny: Ishtar Sink, Maat Mons and Pomona Mons. Quite ironically, Maat is an Egyptian Goddess of truth and justice, while Pomona is a Roman Goddess of gardens. Ishtar (Inanna) is more or less the same as Venus mythologically, and both have very close ties to the planet itself as was observed by the ancient people, which is why the planet was named after them.

Best for last: ancient Greeks considered Venus to be two separate celestial objects because of how Venus sometimes appears early in the morning (morning star) and sometimes early in the evening (evening star). They eventually realised that it's the same object, but they continued using two words to describe it: Phosphoros and Hesperos. Its generally mostly used name was Phosphoros which means... Light-bearer. It's also where the name for the element phosphorus came from. Both phosphorus and sulfur are very much tied to alchemy, which is a huge theme for the Witch Queen. Phosphorus also precedes sulfur on the periodic table (with number 15) and was, alongside sulfur, instrumental in the alchemical search for the Philosopher's stone.

^ This symbol from the same Warlock armour refers to the Philosopher's stone: this is a symbol of philosopher's sulfur. Another related symbol also appears on the Warlock armour that relates to sulfur:

So why is Crow on Venus? Maybe he just wants a place where he can be alone in the world to process what happened. That's fair.

And maybe it's a part of the assignment to find Savathun's throne world because at this point, we all know that to kill a Hive God, they must be killed in their throne world. If the plan is to kill Savathun, and Caiatl is very much into that plan, she is probably looking for the throne world. Crow may be the one to find it. And perhaps someone else has already found it before, if we consider Shayura's Wrath lore.

Okay, I'm done being insane for today.

[atruththatyoudeny]

Happy 28th! Here are all the fics I read this month. Check them out and leave a little love for the authors ♥

Party Lines | nonsensedarling | phone sex - dirty talk - 25k Louis works for a phone-sex operating company, collecting credit card information and transferring calls to different operators. On a particularly busy night, everyone is booked up, and one caller has been patiently waiting for more than a few minutes. In a split second decision –one he’s probably going to regret– Louis picks up the call himself. * Or Louis accidentally becomes a phone sex operator.

Milk Kinship | jaerie | a/b/o - breastfeeding - male lactation - lactation kink - strangers to lovers - 21k Harry had aspired to become a wet nurse since first learning about the honored and respected tradition when he was a teenager. The first documentary he’d seen had been detailed and brutally honest and Harry had still fallen in love with the idea. It’s origins were rooted in highly regarded positions of the royal staff and were credited in playing a role in the lives of some of the most famous children in history. There were medically trained wet nurses and other milk services for mothers unable to feed their babies, but true wet nurse nannies could only be afforded by the rich and famous. The glamorous life appealed to Harry even if his understanding of his role changed to a more realistic view over time. As a starry eyed kid, that was where he wanted to be. Or Harry is a wet nurse and isn't allowed to have an alpha. He may or may not break his vows.

In the Heat Where You Lay | Marchessa | a/b/o - established relationship - nesting - minor injuries - domestic fluff - 5k Louis has a hard time figuring out why his mate, Harry, acts strangely. What shady things the omega does behind his back? Why does he lie in his face when he is asking him about it? Or the one where Louis tries to balance work life and his marriage while he also has to protect Harry from himself since the omega is danger walking on two marvellously long legs at the best of times.

Everything I Didn't Say | denisemuriel | famous/not famous - mpreg - angst - miscommunication - One Night Stands - 25k "I'm going on tour soon and won't be here for most of the year and I think that's just not fair to you." Harry swallowed and brushed a loose curl out of his face. "That's why this won't happen again." Louis had to suppress a sob because he didn't want to cry in front of Harry. "Okay, I understand. It's probably better this way." Harry got up from his seat and walked over to Louis, who also got up. Slowly Harry raised his hand, giving Louis a chance to move away from him, but he allowed Harry to cup his face in his hand and press his forehead against his own. "I know you feel the same connection I do." Harry murmured softly against Louis' lips. "And I wish things were different. I know that if I stayed, I would fall in love with you." He admitted. ✩ Or the one where they meet at the wrong time and when Louis finds out he's pregnant the story gets sold out.

Searching For Lost Time | DuchessKitty16 | ballet - Hip Hop - pining - 16k Harry is a ballet dancer with special talents and a determination to make his dreams come true. Louis is a hip hop b-boy from Manchester who’s been given a chance to attend the prestigious Royal Academy of Dance in London. Louis feels like he has something to prove and show the rest of the dance world that hip hop is just as important an art form as anything other dance discipline. Harry and Louis clash at first and then learn that collaborating makes them stronger. Based on this prompt that I was given: Louis and Harry study at a dance academy. Harry studies ballet and Louis studies hip-hop. They both stay behind after classes to practice and they leave the doors of the rooms open. With their classes across each other, their music is loud and it annoys the other. After a few weeks, Harry and Louis discover that maybe ballet and hip-hop don't sound too bad together. AKA; the one where two types of dancing fit unexpectedly well together, much like Harry and Louis themselves.

Only You (Blue Always Stays True) | BeautifulWisdom | a/b/o - regency - Girl Direction - mutual pining - friends to lovers - 11k Regency AU. Lady Harriet falls for her sister's best friend the elusive Alpha Lady Louise who couldn't possibly return her tender feelings. Or could she?

you and all of heaven's other wonders | devilinmybrain (venomedveins) | Guardian Angel - supernatural elements - 25k "Louis Tomlinson." He starts, the deep voice dipping just a little in the seriousness of his tone. "As a child of the Most Holy, Heaven has seen your struggle on this earth and heard your cry. My name is - " At this point, he does something complicated with his throat, a sound much like a screeching bird and bells combined together before he continues. "and I have been sent here to be your guiding light. Fear not for the Lord is with you." "What?" Louis' accent comes out thicker in his disbelief, dropping consonants as he blinks up at the man. "I'm your-" The man shifts his weight, hesitantly bringing his hands together in front of him. It's an endearingly nervous habit. "I'm your guardian angel."

Lightning Strikes The Heart | Bekita and fournipplesau | a/b/o - Bridgerton AU - enemies to friends to lovers - fake/pretend relationship . regency - angst - fluff - smut - mpreg - 130k Shrewsbury, 1814 Dearest reader, I present to you your new bulletin of news regarding Shrewsbury citizen's activities. My name is Lady Merriweather and I will be in charge of the updates. I will make sure you are to know all the important details of what is to happen this season. You must know that you do not know who I am and you never shall. But be forewarned; I certainly do know you. I advise you to be on your best behaviour, lest you want the whole town to be privy of your business. As expected every year, the Lockhart House hosts the season’s opening ball, and its invitation is the motive of the hustle in town, and every family hopes for the invitation. This year is no different, but this year everyone's attention is focused on the new Duke of Montgomery, His Grace Harry Edward Styles, and whether he will attend it. All the omegas will be in their best manner, behaviour and clothes as it is expected. And here, dear reader is where we will find out which young omega might succeed at securing a match, hoping to not become a spinster. Place your bets.

Glitter in the sky, glitter in our eyes | softfonds | a/b/o - historical - strangers to lovers - fake/pretend relationship - hurt/comfort - mpreg - 59k What happens when a Duke who will only marry for love and a courtesan who only sells it create a public ruse? Well, nothing boring for sure. An Edwardian AU.

Maybe You'll Like the Way I Am | lululawrence | a/b/o - fake/pretend relationship - panic attacks - anxiety - PTSD - heart disease - hurt/comfort - friends to lovers - no smut - angst - 56k Harry stood on his doorstep, waving a little as he shuffled his feet. “Hi, I brought you some cookies.” Louis finally realized Harry was holding a plate with at least a dozen chocolate chip cookies. “How’d you know chocolate chip was my favorite?” Harry scrunched his nose. “I, uh, they’re actually peanut butter chocolate chunk, so I really hope you don’t have a peanut allergy. There’s a lot of peanut butter and chocolate in these. But also, I just hoped that was something you liked because I actually have a favor to ask?” When Louis' alpha neighbor asks him to pretend to be his omega for a week, Louis immediately says no. He has too much he's dealing with on his own, and he swore to himself he'd never get that close to an alpha again. Unable to hold to that resolve once guilt sets in, Louis finds that maybe fumbling his way through a fake relationship for a week was exactly what he needed to finally be able to move on.

Hint: I want to be yours | bluegreenish | a/b/o - friends with benefits to lovers - pining - 11k Thinking back to Harry’s rut, Louis shivers, needing to put effort into keeping other bodily reactions at bay. “Are you cold?” While Niall’s been commenting through the entire film, Harry had stayed mostly quiet, so it’s a surprise when he speaks up, eyes zeroed in on the omega. “Uh, yeah. It’s a bit chilly, innit?” Niall shrugs, dressed in a sleeveless t-shirt and seemingly unbothered by the room temperature. Harry doesn’t ask for an explanation though. “You can have my hoodie, wait, here.” Before Louis can counter, Harry’s pulling the light grey piece of clothing over his head and handing it to the omega. or, the one where Harry unconsciously starts acting like Louis' alpha after they spend his rut together and Louis finds ways to make sure Harry's affection doesn't en

Always a Bridesmaid | kingsofeverything | age difference - weddings - sneaking around - secret relationship - fluff - 30k While Harry’s friends are all getting engaged or married, he’s nowhere near walking down the aisle to his own happily ever after. The night before his best friend’s wedding, Harry falls into bed with a silver haired stranger who makes him wonder what his own forever might look like.

[thepapergirlandthespiegelman]

Castlevania Season 4: I’m not mad, just disappointed

Season 4 is poorly written fanfiction, which is...better than a lot of things could be, I guess.

Spoilers below the cut.

Content warning: trauma, sexual assault, psychological manipulation

The Gods Have Had a Change of Heart

Or, “Season 3 Blocked and Ignored”

Season 3 felt like the fabric of the universe had been twisted just to inflict additional pain. Season 4 overcompensates in the other direction; trauma evaporates, and good things happen for no other reason than to make our favorite characters happy.

The Season 3 finale left two characters in particular totally devastated: Alucard and Hector. Alucard is violently betrayed in a horrifying sexual assault by the first two people he’s spoken to since Trevor and Sypha left. He ends up killing them in self-defense and puts their bodies on stakes outside the castle, alluding to his father’s habit of doing so and potentially hinting at a turn toward evil. Hector is seduced by Lenore and then enslaved using a magic ring.

Yet at the start of Season 4, it’s as if these things never happened. Alucard is troubled, but not totally devastated, certainly not evil. Taka and Sumi are referenced in exactly one conversation with new character, Greta, in which she says the rather tactless throwaway line, “I had a boyfriend and girlfriend at the same time once. But they never tried to kill me.” Hector is nominally imprisoned, but immediately seems highly agentic, perhaps even more so than before. He studies, lays traps, and makes secret plans with other people. Furthermore, his relationship with Lenore is completely transformed. From falling to his knees in abject horror and despair at being enslaved, he suddenly switches to light banter, in what is apparently a basically okay, mutually enjoyed romantic/sexual relationship. Manipulative, selfish Lenore is now a sympathetic character struggling to reconcile her own role and feelings with Carmilla’s plans.

The events of season 3 happened, remaining canon in the most basic, literal sense. But the emotional weight attached to them has disappeared into thin air.

Not gonna lie, I did breathe a sigh of relief when I saw that Alucard and Hector were okay. I’m soft-hearted! I don’t like seeing characters I like suffer! I mean, conflict is important, and I can deal with (or even enjoy in a certain sense) seeing characters suffer if it makes sense and serves a narrative purpose. But as far as I can tell, the season 3 finale was nothing more than lurid, meaningless violence. I probably wouldn’t have continued watching the show if it devolved into nothing more than finding novel ways to torture the characters.

Still, it doesn’t feel quite right to pretend like nothing happened either. Or, really, not that nothing happened, but that those things didn’t matter, didn’t hurt, didn’t leave lasting scars. That’s...almost kind of worse.

But, I thought, I can sort of forgive this sudden shift in the stars, given that there may have been some sort of change in creative direction relating to Ellis’ decreased involvement with the show.* Plus, season 3 was insanity. It’s not like it was full of great writing choices, so if we quietly ignore some of them, maybe that’s for the best.

*I only later learned that Netflix actually chose to continue with Ellis’ season 4 scripts. It is not lost on me that maybe Ellis doesn’t know how to write about the lasting effects of traumatic sexual experiences or how power dynamics can make a sexual relationship problematic because he doesn’t understand that those things exist.

Characters Being Nobody and Nothing Happening

Pretty Pictures, Not Much Else

Unfortunately, the disconnect between seasons 3 and 4 isn’t the only problem with this season. Although I felt that season 4 was a bit less boring than season 3 (I particularly enjoyed some of the earlier episodes of season 4), it suffers from the same basic problems of Characters Being Nobody and Nothing Happening.

None of the characters experience any significant development, let alone any sort of coherent arc. Sypha has changed slightly, becoming more rough and jaded. I did really like the scene where she talks about becoming the kind of person who says “shit.” I think it really speaks to how entering into a relationship with someone means taking on aspects of their lifestyle, and how that can change you in ways that you can’t predict and therefore can’t exactly “agree” to. Sometimes those changes are good, sometimes they’re bad, sometimes they’re neutral, and sometimes it’s difficult to know. But you have to accept that you’re sacrificing some aspects of the person that you could have been if you chose to live completely independently, or with someone else.

Trevor really hasn’t changed since season 1 when he first decided to take up the mantle of hero again. Likewise with Alucard. Hector and Lenore change, as previously noted, but that change is sudden, jarring, and occurs completely off screen in between seasons 3 and 4. Carmilla dies as exactly as she lived: bitter, angry, and violent. Saint Germain just kind of...gets fucked over in a nonsensical subplot, which is its own whole can of worms.

We also get several new characters in season 4, none of whom have developed personalities or motives, nor do they develop any of those things over the course of the season: Greta, Zamfir, Varney, Ratko.

And nobody. Does. Anything.

Trevor and Sypha spend the entire season trying to explore and aid Targoviste, which comes to absolutely nothing. They’re unable to help anyone, Zamfir dies, and they end up just jumping through a magic portal to the actually relevant subplot in the finale. Carmilla literally does little more than draw maps until she’s ultimately killed. Hector plays a minor role in Saint Germain’s extraction of Dracula from Hell; otherwise, he and Lenore basically just exchange banter. Saint Germain does sort of do some stuff? But it’s often unclear how he’s made his connections, who the people who are helping him are, or what exactly he’s doing in terms of his magic beyond “whatever it takes to get back to his lover.”

Sure, there are fight scenes, but they feel meaningless. There’s no context, no stakes. There’s also a LOT of dialogue, and it is. Not well written. Exposition is embarrassingly clumsy at times, and the philosophical musings are cliche at best, muddled and confusing at worst. There’s just not all that much going on.

That is, except for Isaac. But more on him in a second.

What Kind of Show Is This?

When the plot line adapted from Castlevania III: Dracula's Curse ended with season 2, the show struggled to establish a new identity.

Despite nominally dealing with themes like whether humanity is inherently good or evil and how to cope with wrongdoing and loss, seasons 1 and 2 ultimately boiled down to a pretty generic action-adventure/fantasy plot with found family/power of friendship elements. Main characters Trevor, Sypha, and Alucard don’t really wrestle with big philosophical questions or suffer any major defeats. They know that they have to take down Dracula for the good of the world, and they work together as a team to do it, with a little character development relating to their various backstories sprinkled in.

Then season 3 happened, and things got weird. The trio is broken up for what feels like a pretty trivial reason—Alucard has to protect the castle and Belmont hold, I guess? And the result of that decision is that the dynamics for the three main characters are completely unbalanced.

Ellis openly admits that he basically went feral with the writing of season 3, and it shows. The messaging in seasons 1 and 2 was cliche, but consistent. The message of season 3? Anyone’s guess.

Season 4 reversed the darkening of tone from season 3, but shares its inability to pick a story and tell it.

Isaac is the Main Character

Always has been.

While I can’t say that his character or arc are perfect, I can say that he actually has a character and an arc. He starts off motivated by his fierce loyalty to Dracula, then has to struggle to find his purpose once Dracula is gone. He goes from subservient to agentic. He goes from fully endorsing the genocide of humanity and not caring about his own life to seeing some worth in humans and genuinely wanting to live. He has an interesting moment that deepens our understanding of what night creatures are, while also serving as an exploration of the meaning of one’s fundamental nature. Most importantly, these changes happen naturally over the course of the show. They never feel forced or out of the blue, and while I feel like even more could have been done with Isaac’s character, there’s a lot to appreciate about what is there.

If there’s any thread holding Castlevania as a single, coherent work together, it’s Isaac. Not only is his character the best executed and the most coherent over the course of the show, his character explores themes that are larger than himself and relevant to the show as a whole, like those mentioned earlier: misanthropy versus a belief in the value of humanity; the ability to go beyond one’s “nature” or initial circumstances; and how to respond to being wronged or losing something important to you. Exploring the individual lives of characters is great, but really good writing usually requires going beyond that to reflect on broader questions and ideas. Isaac is the only character here that serves that larger purpose.

Sorry...I Just Don’t Buy It

The season 4 finale is crazy, although in a different way from season 3′s.

Varney being Death makes no sense on several different levels. I’m not going to spend a lot of time picking that particular plot twist apart, but I will talk about why I think it doesn’t work at the largest scale, and how I think season 4 might have been done better.

Last minute twists with zero foreshadowing are rarely a good idea, and this is no exception. Why introduce this “Death” entity at the last minute to be the most important battle of the season? The finale of the entire show, even? Besides the lack of logic or emotional buildup, this robs the show of the opportunity to make use of the antagonists that it already has. Since Dracula died, Carmilla has been the obvious choice for a new big bad. Why hasn’t she done more?

Season 4 feels crowded with characters and plot lines that amount to nothing. Why not bring some of these characters together? If Carmilla is the main antagonist, how come she never meets any of the protagonists (except Hector, who is a pretty minor player in this ecosystem) or even affects them in any way?

Season 4 feels like maybe it was trying to make something out of season 3 and the model that it presented, but it ultimately fails to do so. The writers throw the trio back together at the end anyway, so why not have them rejoin sooner and work together? Maybe Sypha and Trevor’s past experience with Saint Germain could have helped Alucard and Greta piece together what he was plotting sooner, rather than all four of them being completely blindsided by it in the penultimate episode. (Sypha and Trevor know that someone is trying to resurrect Dracula, but they fail to find out any actual detail about the plans, despite their supposed attempts.) Have characters actually do stuff, figure stuff out, advance the plot!

Likewise, maybe Carmilla becomes aware of Saint Germain’s scheming, sees it as a threat, and tries to take him down. Maybe she tries to get involved and somehow use alchemy or the Infinite Corridor to her own benefit. What does it look like when power-hungry Carmilla, who wants to rule the world, finds out there’s an entire multiverse out there? That could easily set her up to be a foil to Saint Germain, causing him to realize that what he’s doing is wrong.

What actually ended up happening in the show feels disjointed and often empty. In particular, most of the events that happen in the last two episodes just don’t really work for me. I didn’t like Trevor suddenly sacrificing himself to this random, new, super powerful enemy, or how the gems and dagger that he found just happened to be the perfect weapon to kill this new enemy, or how he inexplicably returns from the dead.

This kind of thing is what I mean when I say that this season feels like fanfiction. Trevor comes back from the dead for no discernible reason other than that it would really suck if he died. Greta as a character seems to literally only exist to be Alucard’s girlfriend and support him so that he doesn’t have to continue to be alone and potentially turn evil. Alucard’s trauma from Taka and Sumi and Hector’s trauma from Lenore are both conveniently erased. Even Dracula and Lisa are resurrected somehow and get their happy ending. And it’s like, I guess I prefer deus ex machina to the opposite (Does that have a name? When everything is going well but then something terrible happens for no reason other than to make things worse for the characters?), but they’re both bad writing.

God. This isn’t even getting into what happened with the Council of Sisters. And I don’t even really like those characters, but that doesn’t mean I want to see their characters handled poorly.

I’m not sorry that I watched until the end, but I can’t in good faith recommend the show as a whole. If you’ve yet to watch Castlevania, just stop at the end of season 2. While there are some shining moments in seasons 3 and 4 (4 more than 3), it’s just really not worth it.

[mc-critical]

Could you do a personality reading/analysis on Nurbanu? Her development, crucial points in her story. Also, do you think she truly loved Selim or only cared about becoming a Haseki and then working towards becoming Valide Sultan? Early S4, we see her asking Canfeda if Selim is going to become Sultan, which raises the question if she was plotting for her own benefit or actually fell for Selim?

I find Nurbanu to be a character ripe with personality, despite that she only has a single season of material. Just like with Selim, or perhaps even more so, I find what was done with her fascinating. She's the second character that follows the general pattern of a "SOW" arc and it's interesting to see how much she parralels and differs from that arc.

While Hürrem starts out on the ship that was going to the Ottoman castle, we meet Nurbanu already there, standing right in front of the doors outside; sharing the same fate as the others next to her, yet it looks like she's entering there like an external witnesser of a whole other culture. But she hasn't forgotten who she is. She's used to a fairly calm life she looks very much proud of, the life of a Venetian noble woman with dignity and pride, and that is suddenly snatched all away from her. She justifiably resents those that have done this to her. She wasn't willing to go through the harem life at first, so she wanted to take her own life. I feel this comes from her genuine hopelessness that overtook her in the beggining, the situation she was in might have been way too much for her. After all, she isn't faced solely with a sense of lost identity, her current position in the harem is the exact opposite of what she was meant to do before. But after she was saved by Selim, it was perhaps then she decided to fight and survive in her curcumstances.

That said, while it may be result of her more condensed development, I always remain surprised of how fast Nurbanu found out what exactly she had to do to go on top. Maybe I shouldn't, since part of her motivation may come from not only her natural instincts, but also her will to return to the closest equivalent of her previous position once again, but the way she orients herself, how quickly she tends to react, the way she decides exactly how to act following both instinct and logic. I really like that about her. She reacts so well in tense situations, knowing which buttons to push to get the wanted effect in all her interactions with Hürrem, Selim, Canfeda, etc. It's telling of how much one particular event can change a person, opening up traits and qualities one may not have previously demonstrated. And for me, Nurbanu is one of the best examples of this.

Her "tertiary character trait" is very unique for the show, and overall: her ability to read the stars is amazing on its own and should be more appreciated, but the way it complements her character makes it even better. It's like a consitent guide for her: whether she's going on the right direction. And when she sees she's supported by fate itself, she gets even more of a push to rise up in the hierarchy and pull a victory. I loved the scenes where she went out to see the stars and where she told Hürrem of her future - they establish a lot about her. I only wish we saw even more of it. (I feel that ability of Nurbanu's works pretty well in a thematic way, as well: it enforces even more strongly that times/eras change, just like the positions of the stars change. And the motif of changing eras is major for her future conflict with Hürrem and the SOW, as a whole.)

Nurbanu also has a very psychological side of hers that was key in helping her realize what exactly Selim needed to get the motivation necessary to fight for the throne. She so often understood what exactly he needed and what had to be done, making her a voice of reason for him that could give him her word of advice. And that evolved even more as time went on: first she helped him to stand on his feet, then both of them made plans on how to get further ahead in the game, in conjunction with her own rise in the hierarchy. Even her provocations (mostly towards Huricahan, but Hürrem too later on) seemed more intentional than anything even when they weren't. Most of the time, she knew where to hit and what to say.

Even though she had a tendency to work more alone and had the intention to rise to power from the start (similarly to Hürrem), I think she fell for Selim. Wanting power, knowing what you need to do to get it and still caring for the person next to you that advances your power aren't mutually exclusive things, especially not in that time period. Maybe all Nurbanu felt for Selim was gratitude for saving him at first, but when she went to Manisa, she did come to love him eventually. She felt jealousy anytime he touched other women and always strived to comfort him in his problems and I don't think it's solely out of manipulation, knowing the core of her arc.

For me the major goal of Nurbanu's character development, her gaining more agency to fight her way to become Valide Sultan aside, was her slowly and mostly letting go of any possible scruple left in her in order to win- letting go of her more human side. We see in many instances in S04A that there's much humanity left in her and sometimes she isn't ready to do cruel stuff, even if asked to and no matter how much she wanted to adapt, she didn't realize how far exactly did she have to go to achieve her goals until a certain point. Because Nurbanu is a very patient character that goes more "one step at a time" in Manisa. She's focused on one certain aspect of the goal that contributes to the bigger victory: first it was to go to Manisa, then to win Selim over, then to make sure no one stands in the way, then to help him get advantage, then to grow herself, then help him defeat Bayezid, then erase the obstacle of Defne, as well, to become Valide, with little to no break in between. And sometimes both her own mistakes (like beating up Huricihan) and the system's cruelty (like Mustafa's death) tend to surprise her and go to paths she didn't expect to go otherwise.

I summarized most of the major story beats in her development (and talked a bit more about her in general) here, but I'll delve into them more. Her relationship with Hürrem demonstrates the best of Nurbanu coming into her own. It's not to be denied that Hürrem was the one who gave her a head start with giving her the name and sending her to Selim's sanjack, Nurbanu's arc began with her being loyal to someone else. But she's just as brave, ambitious and determined as Hürrem and for that reason their paths were always meant to separate. Nurbanu wanted for her own time to come, not to be bound by someone else, hence she isn't one that would blindly follow orders. From the beggining she had her own compass and instincts she would follow and that slowly made her clash with Hürrem, who envisioned Nurbanu as someone loyal to her first and foremost. The distance also helped in separating them, with them only sending letters to each other, when Hürrem was doing her own thing in Topkapi, while Nurbanu - in Manisa, both working for different goals entirely. The first challange of her loyalty she faced was also connected to her humanity, to the demise of someone close to her. Even though she obeyed the order (albeit more accidentally), she swore not to repeat it again and her remaining loyal was put at doubt right then and there. But what sealed the deal was Huricihan, where I feel Nurbanu got completely disappointed at Hürrem not wanting to cover for her, which is why she put out that ultimatum in the first place.  Even then Nurbanu was surprised to detach from her completely, even though the hints were there before. I don't think she truly expected for Hürrem not to support what she worked for with Selim in the end, because it was only natural for Nurbanu to help him fight, not only preventing and covering his mistakes. Turning against Hürrem was more of a necessity for Nurbanu - she knew where she came from, but she was ready to fight for her position, even if it meant fighting against Hürrem herself. She was careful enough with her before they became full on enemies, though- she asked her for help when Selim messed up in Topkapi, she was reporting to her about the progress in Manisa, she showed the necessary respect for Hürrem. But that appeared to be over when she stole the ring, the symbolic demonstration that now, the power is in Nurbanu's hands - that's the truth and that's the future, no need to lean on the past anymore. And it's the main thing she would capitalize on now.

Her humanity shone most in two personal aspects of hers: her relation to Nazenin and her fight with Dilşah.

Her relation to Nazenin is probably the clearest showcase of her old ways she's still letting go of. Once they arrived in the harem, Nazenin seemed to adapt way faster; their dynamic changed to a point they were already on equal ground, something Nurbanu isn't used to and doesn't take very well, as a result. When Nazenin is the one supposed to go to Manisa instead of her, Nurbanu didn't like it, either, and wanted to be the one to take that chance instead of her. And when they reunited, they had to deal with the difference in their changed positions much more openly, with "fighting" about who's superior. It's like their dynamic changed in the blink of an eye and it's moments like these where Nurbanu shows her remaining pride to people in front of her, because seeing a person in a lower position before being elevated as highly as her, no matter how much she would care about her, wounds the pride she once had as a noble woman and that was on her way to keep going on. Even then she certainly didn't want for Nazenin to die and her death was about the last fraction of Nurbanu's past going away and the first step of her human side going away, too. Despite their strained relationship, Nurbanu lost a close person who's been with her from the beggining in this game. [Nurbanu and Nazenin have their share of parallels with Hürrem and Gülnihal: both pairs were together from the start and were forced to stand against each other through an order (though for Nurbanu and Nazenin that wasn't the entirety of it), both Nazenin and Gülnihal wanted to gain their agency and became understandably proud of what they've gained and both Hürrem and Nurbanu were against that and did something to them that put that kind of conflict to an end. Nazenin could also be the "Leo" to Nurbanu in terms of the past to an extent.]

Her dynamic with Dilşah, while mostly being a fight for Selim we knew Nurbanu was going to win, caused another human side of Nurbanu to go away - her bringing a dog in the harem and that dog ending up killed by Dilşah. (similarly to Valide killing Hürrem's horse, which played a role in comforting her during the Isabella arc.) That strongly implied that Nurbanu had a soft spot for animals and that she had a warm, caring side, contrasted with her otherwise cold and pragmatic nature. The killing of the dog, done solely to hurt her, helped to further enforce that coldness and pragmatism and went against any attachment, because perhaps such attachment would only render you vulnerable. 

But Mustafa's death was the turning point of Nurbanu's arc, just like with Selim. It sealed even further the path of no return when she saw something she doubted was ever possible ("can a father kill his son?") and while she has "played dirty" before, now the methods she was slowly developing were even more assured. It's like she and Selim had to become unscrupulous at all costs.

In spite of her plans working almost everytime, she has definetly acted irrationally and that is a part of her pride. She acted against Huricihan mostly out of sheer pride and she wouldn't allow for someone to challange her position, even rightfully. That ounce of pride doesn't consume her, however, and doesn't go in the way of her plans, and even if it does, she can turn things around in her favor, like with her part in Huricihan's death.

In the end, Nurbanu has reached a point where she is fixated on her own power and victory at hand, mostly discarding anything else. She looked like a very strict mother the moments we saw her as one - wanting the best for Murad and keeping an eye on who he interacts with. She's developed a huge perceptiveness and sensitivity of future threats that extended to Defne and fixed on Safiye - I feel she realized she would be a danger later down the line during their scene together, even if we leave alone her being raised and gifted by Mihrimah. She may not have expected the amount of Safiye's growing power and influence and that may have caused her to be drastic. We're meant to believe through Safiye's words that Nurbanu became crueler as a Valide Sultan, but that could be coupled by both her development and Safiye's own distinct view on Nurbanu. She probably used means similar to both Ayşe Hafsa and S04 Hürrem.

I see Canfeda as Nurbanu's guide in the Manisa harem itself that also helped her in quite a few ways. But they always came to work more as a unit, considering what is best for Selim and the future in that moment. Both of them are smart, quite opportunistic and dedicated to what they do, that's why they complement each other so well. Canfeda, similarly to Nigar, saw Nurbanu's potential to elevate, but still insisted on following the harem tradition when it was needed. (like with Selim's concubines) Nurbanu seemed really eager to learn from her. They had soft spots for each other, but the quickly changing circumstances they were in didn't allow for many "heart to heart" moments.

[asleepinawell]

Book Recs

I was gonna do one of these at the end of the year, but I’ve somehow managed to read 26 books this year already (12 novellas, 14 novels), almost all featuring queer authors and/or characters so this is already a long list.

Note: There’s a few on here I was kind of meh about, but in most of those cases it was a ‘book might be good but it’s not for me so i’ll mention it to put it on people’s radar anyway’ type of thing. Insert the usual necessary tumblr disclaimer about all of this being only my opinion and your opinions are valid too etc etc.

In order of when I read them:

Princess Floralinda and the Forty-Flight Tower by Tamsyn Muir - Fantasy novella from the author of gideon the ninth that’s a twist on the classic princess trapped in a tower waiting for a prince story. Quite fun. (novella)

The Monster of Elendhaven by Jennifer Giesbrecht - Dark fantasy about revenge and magic. m/m couple but like I said it’s pretty dark and twisted all around so definitely not a happy queer romantic story. My opinion was interesting premise that could have been executed better and probably should have been a full novel to embellish on the world building potential. (novella)

A Memory Called Empire & A Desolation Called Peace - Arkady Martine - Probably tied with murderbot as the best things I read this year. Scifi, f/f couple, wonderfully done exploration of what it means to fall in love with a culture that is destroying your own. More of the many queer anti-imperialist books that have come out recently and certainly some of the best. The second one is a direct continuation of the first. (2 novels)

The Tyrant Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson - This is the third in the Baru Cormorant series (The Masquerade) and was my favorite so far. The second and third book were originally one book that got split I believe and the second book didn’t stand alone as well (though was still great), but the third book really made up for that. Dark fantasy world starring a queer woc whose country and culture is destroyed by the imperial forces of that world colonizing and assimilating them. She vows revenge and decides to work her way up within her enemy’s ranks to enact it from within and bring an empire to ruins. Really really fascinating study of so many different aspects of our own world and the systems which enable and allow bigotry and how bigoted and violent narratives are used to control minorities. This is definitely a darker series and I was particularly impressed with some of the commentary on the racism prevalent in non-intersectional feminism as depicted through a fantasy world. Can’t wait for the last one to come out! (3 novels, 1 forthcoming)

The Murderbot Diaries - Martha Wells - There’s six of them--5 novella and a novel--and the first is All Systems Red. Told from the point of view of a self-aware droid/android that is rented out by a corporation to provide protection in a dystopian capitalist hellhole future that isn’t that unlike our current capitalist dystopia but is in space. Muderbot hacked the chip that controlled it and instead of going rogue just wants to be left alone to watch its favorite tv shows. Murderbot is painfully relatable and the books are both funny and poignant. Highly recommended. (5 novellas and a novel).

Winter’s Orbit - Everina Maxwell - This was a m/m romance novel with a scifi backdrop of royal intrigue. Generally I’m more into scifi with a queer relationship in the background than vice versa, so it wasn’t my favorite, BUT I think it was still well written and someone looking for more of the romance angle would enjoy it. Has all your favorite romance tropes in it, especially the yearning. (novel)

The Divine Cities - Robert Jackson Bennett - Three book series. I’m very conflicted about this one. Set in a fantasy world where an enslaved nation overthrew the country enslaving them and now rules over them. It’s a story of what happens after the triumphant victory and within that it’s also a murder mystery tied into the dying magic of the conquered nation. It also has a six foot something naked oily viking man fist fight a cthulhu in a frozen river. The second book was by far my favorite, mostly due to the main character being brilliant. My conflict comes from the fact I don’t feel like the story treated its women and queer characters well. Like it had really great characters but it didn’t do great by them overall. That and the third book didn’t live up to the first two. But still definitely worth a read, can’t stress enough how cool some of the world building was. (3 novels)

Into the Drowning Deep - Mira Grant - This might be the only one on here I disliked. It’s got a doomed boat voyage and creepy underwater terror and monsters and a super diverse cast of characters, but I just didn’t enjoy the writing style. While having a diverse cast is great, there were a lot of moments where it felt like characters were pausing to explain things about themselves that felt like a tumblr post rather than a normal conversation you might have while actively being hunted by monsters. I also bounced off all the characters. But a lot of people seem to have liked it so if you’re into horror and want a book with a f/f main couple then maybe you’ll enjoy it. (novel)

Dead Djinn Universe - P. Djèlí Clark - Around the early 1900′s, a man in Egypt discovers a way to access another world and bring Djinn and mysterious clockwork beings called Angels through. As a result, Egypt tells the British to get fucked and Cairo becomes one of the most powerful cities in the world. So Egypt, magic, djinn, a steampunk-ish vibe, oh and the main character is a butch queer woman who enjoys wearing dapper suits and looking fabulous while she investigates supernatural events. Her girlfriend is also mysterious and badass. And she has a cat. There’s three novella (one of which technically might be considered a short story) and then the first novel. You should absolutely read the novellas first (A Dead Djinn in Cairo, The Angel of Khan el-Khalili, The Haunting of Tram Car 015). Super fun and imaginative series. (3 novellas and a novel, more forthcoming)

River of Teeth & Taste of Marrow - Sarah Gailey - From the book description

“In the early 20th Century, the United States government concocted a plan to import hippopotamuses into the marshlands of Louisiana to be bred and slaughtered as an alternative meat source. This is true. Other true things about hippos: they are savage, they are fast, and their jaws can snap a man in two. This was a terrible plan.”

Queer hippo riders!!!! Very much a western but with hippos. Main couple included a non-binary character. Loved the first one. The second one I was more meh about due to one of the characters I was supposed to like having obnoxious man pain that a woman had to take the brunt of the whole time. Also there were less hippos. But queer hippo riders! Definitely read the first one, and they’re both novellas so no reason not to read the second as well. (2 novellas)

A Psalm for the Wild-Built - Becky Chambers - I may be the only person who hasn’t read the long way to a small angry planet at this point, but I did grab her new novella and I loved it. It made me want to go sit out in the woods and feel peaceful. The world it’s set in feels like a peaceful post-apocalypse...or diverted apocalypse maybe. Humans built robots and robots gained sentience, but instead of rebelling they just up and left and went into the wilderness with a promise that the humans wouldn’t follow them.The remaining human society reshaped itself into something new and peaceful. It’s the story of a monk who leaves their habitual monking duties to go be a tea monk and then later wanders into the wilderness and becomes the first human in ages to meet a robot. Very sad there’s no fan art yet. (novella, more forthcoming)

The March North - Graydon Saunders - This was such a weird book that I’m not sure how to explain it. The prose style is hard to get used to and I suspect a lot of people will bounce off it in the first chapter. There’s no third person pronouns used at all and important events get mentioned once in passing and if you blink you’ll miss them. Set on a world where magic is extremely common to the point that rivers sometimes run with blood or fire and the local weeds are something out of a horror movie and most of the world is run by powerful sorcerer dictators, one country banded together (with the help of a few powerful sorcerers who were tired of all the bullshit) to form a free country where powerful sorcerers wouldn’t rule and the small magics of every day folks could be combined to work together. The story revolves around a Captain of the military force on the border who one day has three very powerful sorcerers sent to them by the main government with the hint that just maybe there’s about to be a big invasion (there is) with the implication of take these guys and go deal with this. The world building is extremely complex and very cool...when you can actually understand what the fuck is going on. There is also a murder sheep named Eustace who breathes fire and eats just about everything and is a Very Good Boy and belongs to the most terrifying sorcerer in the world who appears as a little old grandma with knitting. It had one of the most epic badass and wonderfully grotesque battles I’ve ever read. But yeah, it is not what I would call easy reading. Opinions may vary wildly. I did also read the second one (A Succession of Bad Days) in the series which was easier to follow and had a lot more details about the world, but overall I was more meh about it despite some cool aspects. The chapters and chapters of the extreme details of building a house that made up half the novel just weren’t my thing. (novels).

The Space Between Worlds - Micaiah Johnson - In this world parallels universes exist and we’ve discovered how to travel between them, but the catch is you can only go to worlds where the ‘you’ there is already dead. This turns into an uncomfortable look at who would be the people most likely to have died on many worlds and how things like class and race would fit into that and what we would actually use this ability for (if you guessed stealing resources and the stock market you’d be correct). The main character is a queer woc who travels between worlds with the assistance of her handler (another queer woc) who she has the hots for. She accidentally stumbles on a whole lot of mess and conspiracy and gets swept up in that. Really enjoyed it. (novel)

Witchmark - C.L. Polk - Fantasy world reminiscent of Victorian England (I think?) where a young man with magical gifts runs away from his powerful family to avoid being exploited by them. He joins the army and fights in a war and comes home to try and live a quiet life as a doctor, but a murder pulls him into a larger mystery that upturns his life. Also he’s extremely gay and there’s a prevalent m/m romance. This one was a fun-but-not-mind-blowing one for me. (novel, 2 more in the series I haven’t read)

The Priory of the Orange Tree - Samantha Shannon - This was one of those that everyone loved but I couldn’t get into for some reason. I tried twice and only got about halfway through the second time. It’s got dragons and queer ladies and fantasy world and all the things I like, but I wasn’t that invested in the main story (which included the f/f couple) and was more interested in the smaller story about a woman trying to become a dragon rider. There are few things that beat out a lady and her dragon friend story for me and that was the storyline that felt neglected and took a different turn right when we got to the part I’d been waiting for. But, I know a lot of people whose reading opinions I respect who loved it, and if you like epic fantasy with dragons and queens and treachery and pirates and queer characters then I’d say you should definitely give it a try. (novel)

Bonus: I didn’t read these series this year, but if you haven’t read them yet, you should.

Imperial Radch (Ancillary Justice) - Ann Leckie - Spaceship AI stuck in a human body out for revenge for their former captain, but that summary does not come close to doing it justice. Another one examining imperialism and also gender and race.(3 novels)

Kushiel's Legacy Series - Jacqueline Carey - This is two series, six books total, and starts with Kushiel's Dart. Alternate universe Renaissance-y Europe in a fantastical world where sex isn't shameful and sex workers are respected and prized. Lots of political intrigue and mystery. A lot of BDSM and kinky stuff too (the main character is a sexual masochist, oh and also bi!). I first read this series when I was fifteen or sixteen and it definitely made a big impression on me. Same author also wrote the Santa Olivia series which I’d also recommend. (6 novels)

The Locked Tomb (Gideon the Ninth) - Tamsyn Muir - I mean, if you follow me, you know. If you don’t follow me you still probably know. I’d have felt remiss to have left them off though. Lesbian Necormancers in Space. Memes! Skeletons! Biceps! Go read them. (2 novels, 2 forthcoming, 1 short story)

Books On My To Read List:

Fireheart Tiger - Aliette de Bodard

The Order of the Pure Moon Reflected in Water - Zen Cho

Black Sun - Rebecca Roanhorse

This Is How You Lose the TIme War - Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone

Ninefox Gambit - Yoon Ha Lee

Also, if anyone has any recs for scifi/fantasy books starring queer men (not necessarily having to do with a queer relationship) and written by queer men I’d love them. There’s a lot written by women, and some of them are great, but I’d love to read a story about queer men from their own perspective.

[dwellordream]

“...In early portraits Livia sports the nodus hairstyle, in which the hair rolls forward over the forehead and is then drawn back to form a distinctive topknot. This style was seen by Ovid as a useful corrective to a very round face. Generally in the heads of this group the face is a regular oval with broad cheekbones. The eyes are large and the brow above them arches slightly. The nose is large and aquiline, while the curving mouth and the chin are very small. The portraits project an image well suited to Livia—one of ageless and elegant beauty, calm and dignified, perhaps strangely emotionless.

The severity of the nodus style would be less appealing with age. Thus the hair in portraits of the Tiberian period generally has a centre parting, and falls from either side in waves. The head is still relatively youthful, given that Livia must have been now in her seventies, a tradition maintained by modern aging monarchs, whose images on stamps and coins tend to be frozen for several decades. It could be argued that the elusive issue of Livia’s appearance is irrelevant in a political biography. But it has some historical importance. The sources suggest that Augustus was drawn to Livia initially by basic sexual attraction. Some knowledge of her physical appearance would help us place that claim in a proper context. 

Whatever attributes Livia was granted by Nature she could enhance by Art. When it came to dress, Ovid attributes to Livia a surprisingly progressive attitude, that she was simply too busy to spend a lot of time on her appearance. The assertion has to be seen against the background of a large household and an enormous staff, whose task it would have been to pay attention to those details deemed unworthy of their mistress’s time and effort. The evidence for the wide range of functionaries operating within the household of Livia is dealt with in chapter 9.

At this point we can limit ourselves to noting the surprising number of helpers devoted to Livia’s personal appearance. Inevitably there were several ornatrices (dressers), as well as staff a veste/ad vestem, whose task it was to keep her clothes in good order. In addition, the ab ornamentis would have had responsibility for her ceremonial garments and accessories, along with a specialist who looked after those she wore as priestess of Augustus, a freedman ab ornamentis sacerdotalibus. Her calciator made her shoes. Augustus liked to boast that his clothes were made by his wife and sister. Perhaps, but they would have had help. Livia employed both lanipendi (wool weighers) and sarcinatores / sarcinatrices (sewing men / women). For her comfort she had an unctrix (masseuse). 

Perhaps most striking are the skilled craftsmen who would have been employed for the manufacture and maintenance of luxury items. Her aurifex (goldsmith) and inaurator (gilder) might have been occupied mainly with furniture, but the margaritarius (pearl setter) sounds like someone who would have been employed to work on her personal jewellery. Elizabeth Bartman has noted the absence of jewellery from the sculpted images of Livia, which she describes as ‘‘bordering on the ascetic.’’ This, of course, may have been a deliberate fabrication of Livia’s image in the sculptural prototypes that she allowed to be distributed. There was a tradition of Roman women making a sacrifice of luxury items for the good of the state, such as the women who donated their jewellery to help fund the war against Veii in the early republic. 

But it may be that Livia aimed for understated elegance, to be simplex munditiis, as Horace expressed the concept in his famous poem. This could explain why Augustus aroused amused disbelief among the senators when he held up Livia as an example of womanhood and, when pressed to explain, cited as evidence her appearance and dress and her exodoi (her public forays) as illustrations of moderation to be emulated. Augustus had the evidence of his own eyes, and he admired her for avoiding extravagance. But the senators perhaps may have seen a kind of elegant moderatio, the appearance of simplicity that only the best dressmakers, coiffeurs, and jewellers can produce, using the finest and most expensive material. 

Livia’s energies would have been channelled mainly into her role as wife of Augustus and as mother of Tiberius. We know little of her private interests, or of how she tried to relax. Only one scrap of evidence survives for anything remotely approaching frivolity. She seems to have competed inanely with Julia, the granddaughter of Augustus, over the record for owning the smallest dwarf. This was settled honourably, as Julia owned the smallest male, at two feet, one palm (about sixty-seven centimetres), but Livia could boast the smallest female dwarf, Andromeda, height not recorded. We might also detect perhaps a hint of a certain silliness when she was a young woman.

The story of her trying to foretell her child’s sex by means of a hen’s egg is noted in chapter 1. After Tiberius’ birth she seems to have consulted an astrologer (mathematicus), Scribonius. He was able to forecast that her son would govern, but without the trappings of monarchical rule, an especially impressive performance, because he anticipated this before the principate had been established and before Livia had even met Augustus. But this kind of behaviour should be viewed in the context of its age, and Livia was probably no more unsophisticated in such matters than the great mass of her contemporaries. 

Otherwise her interests are likely to have been more serious, and she seems to have been a literate and educated woman. At any rate, in one of his letters to her Augustus quotes frequently and extensively in Greek, presumably on the assumption that she would understand him. She did of course spend some time in the Greek world during the period of her first husband’s exile, but she would at that time have moved mainly in a Latin-speaking milieu. It is more than likely that she learned the language through formal tuition. Given her family background, we can assume that Livia would have been well educated as a child. Roman girls shared domestic tutors with their brothers before their marriage. There are many examples of the happy result of this practice. Pliny the Younger was flattered to find his young wife reading and memorizing his works, and setting his verses to music. Cornelia, the wife of Pompey, was educated in literature, music, and geometry, and enjoyed attending philosophical discussions. 

The existence of the highly educated woman, at least at a slightly later date, is confirmed by the caustic observations of the atrabilious Juvenal, who proclaims horror at females who speak with authority on literature, discuss ethical issues, quote lines of verse the rest of humanity has not even heard of, and even correct your mistakes of grammar. Apart from Livia’s knowledge of Greek, however, we have no concrete evidence of her intellectual pursuits, in contrast to her great-granddaughter Agrippina, whose memoirs survived and were read by Tacitus. But we do have some testimony about Livia’s intellectual sophistication. Philo was a contemporary and, though a resident of Alexandria, very familiar with Rome and the imperial house. 

For example, he met Caligula in person when he headed a delegation to Rome to represent the case of the Jews of his native town. In a speech that he attributes to Caligula’s Jewish friend Herod Agrippa, he has Agrippa cite the precedent of Livia, whom he represents as a woman of great mental ability and untypical of her sex, for he contended that women were generally incapable of grasping mental concepts (whether this is Agrippa’s or Philo’s prejudice is not made clear). Agrippa supposedly attributed Livia’s superiority in this sphere to her natural talents and to her education (paideia). Livia was well disposed to the Jews and generous to the Temple, and we might expect some gilding of the lily. But Philo’s characterization of her could clearly not have been absurdly wide of the mark, or the arguments attributed to Agrippa would have been discredited. 

The Corinthian poet Honestus describes Livia as fit company for the muses, a woman who saved the world by her wisdom. The inflated language traditional in such a dedicatory piece, however, means that it has little historical value. Apart from the uncertain case of Honestus, we have no other case of Livia’s supporting any cultural or intellectual endeavour, although she was an active patron in many other areas. In this sphere she was eclipsed by Augustus’ sister Octavia, who was a sponsor of the architect Vitruvius and to whom the Stoic philosopher Athenodorus of Tarsus dedicated a book of his work. Although Livia’s interest in fostering artistic and cultural undertakings might have been limited, there was one field in which her enthusiasm seems to have been boundless: the issue of healthy living, both physical and psychological. Despite her general reserve in most other matters, she seems to have been willing, even eager, to impart her views on the issue of how to live a long and robust life. 

She was ahead of her time in her use of what would now be called a grief counsellor. When her son Drusus died in 9 bc, she was devastated. That she managed to handle the situation with dignity was due to no small extent to the counselling given her by the philosopher Areus (or Areius) Didymus of Alexandria. Areus was basically a Stoic but kept an open mind to other schools and ideas, the kind of eclectic pragmatist that the Romans found appealing. He was clearly a man of great charm, and at the time of Actium, Octavian described him as his mentor and companion. Octavian reputedly spared all the Alexandrians after the battle and stated publicly that he did so because of the fame of Alexander the Great, the beauty of the city, and his regard for one of its citizens, Areus. In the event Alexandria did not emerge totally unscathed, for Octavian followed up his generous gesture by visiting the corpse of Alexander, where he behaved like the worst kind of bad tourist, touching the nose and breaking it off.

According to Seneca’s account, to which the author undoubtedly added his own imaginative touches, Areus, in giving his advice to Livia, described himself as an assiduus comes (constant companion) of her husband and claimed to know not only their public pronouncements but also the secretiores animorum vestrorum motus (the deeper emotions of the two of you). He clearly knew his patient well, and in the event proved a highly effective consultant. He gently observed that Livia had been in the habit of repressing her feelings and of being constantly on guard in public. He encouraged her to open up when dealing with the subject of Drusus, to speak to her friends about the death of her son, and to listen to others when they praised him. She should also dwell on the positive side of things, particularly the happiness that he brought her when he was still alive. The advice may have the shallow ring of the popular psychology handed out in the modern media, but it worked. 

Seneca observed how well Livia coped with her loss by following this advice, in contrast to the morbidly obsessive Octavia, sister of Augustus, who never ceased to be preoccupied with thoughts of her dead son Marcellus. Livia lived a long and, by her own description, healthy life, with only one serious illness recorded, when she was already eighty. Her formula for her robust constitution seems to have been proper diet and the use of ‘‘natural’’ remedies. She clearly had the irritating habit of healthy people who insist on inflicting on others their philosophy of wholesome living. For history this has proved fortunate, because some of her dietary recommendations are recorded. In her early eighties she anticipated a trend that was to reemerge almost two thousand years later, attributing her vigorous condition to her daily tipple. She drank exclusively the wine of Pucinum. This was a very select vintage, grown on a stony hill in the Gulf of Trieste, not far from the source of the Timavo, where the sea breezes ripen enough grapes to fill a few amphorae. Pliny confirms its medicinal value, which he suspects might long have been recognised, even by the Greeks.

It need not be thought that in following this regimen Livia had simply invented a formula for healthy living. In fact, she was echoing a nostrum that had become very trendy in her youth, and in doing so marked herself as an acolyte of one of the master-gurus of health-faddists, Asclepiades of Prousias. According to tradition, Asclepiades started as a poor professor of rhetoric before turning to medicine. During his career he acquired considerable fame (Pliny speaks of his summa fama) and provoked the animosity of other medical writers—he was still being attacked by Galen almost three hundred years after his death. The anger of his fellow healers is not hard to explain, because he turned ancient medicine on its head by distancing himself from dangerous pharmacological and surgical procedures, even describing traditional medicine as a ‘‘preparation for death.’’ Instead, he placed emphasis on more humane and agreeable treatments—diet, passive exercise, massages, bathing, even rocking beds. Pliny felt that he mainly used guesswork but was successful because he had a smooth patter. 

How effective he was cannot be gauged now. He is said to have recovered a ‘‘corpse’’ from a funeral procession and then to have successfully treated it. But famous doctors in antiquity routinely restored the dead to life. Perhaps more impressive, and more alarming to the medical profession, was Asclepiades’ pledge that by following his own prescriptions he could guarantee that he would never be ill, and that if he lapsed, he would retire from medicine. He was apparently never put to the test, and eventually died by accident, falling from a ladder. It is not hard to believe that Asclepiades might have exercised an influence on Livia, especially in that Pliny remarks that he almost brought the whole human race round to his point of view, and Elizabeth Rawson argues that a case can be made that he was the most influential Greek thinker at work in Rome in the first century bc. Pliny notes a dilemma that has a strangely contemporary ring—whether wine is more harmful or helpful to the health. 

As the champion of the latter belief Pliny cites Asclepiades, who wrote a book on wine’s benefits, based to some extent on the teaching of Cleophantus. Asclepiades received a familiar nickname oinodotes (wine giver), although to avoid being cast as someone who encouraged inebriation, he did advocate abstinence under certain circumstances. As Pliny words it, Asclepiades stated that the benefits of wine were not surpassed by the power of the gods, and the historian, like Livia, seems to have been won over, conceding that wine drunk in moderation benefitted the sinews and stomach, and made one happy, and could even be usefully applied to sores. Livia might have become acquainted with Asclepiades’ teaching while he was still alive (it is uncertain when he died), but in any case Pliny makes it clear that after his death his ideas took a firm hold on the population, and would still have been in circulation for many years after he made his ultimate precipitous descent from the ladder.

Apart from her views on the benefits of fine wines, Livia was known for other health tips. Pliny adds his personal recommendation for one of her fads, a daily dose of inula (elecampane). The elecampane, with its broad yellow petals, is a common plant throughout Europe, and its root has long been a popular medicine. Because it is bitter and can cause stomach upset if eaten alone, it is usually ground up, or marinated in vinegar and water, then mixed with fruit or honey. It was supposedly useful for weak digestion. Horace describes its popularity among gluttons, who could overdo safely by using elecampane afterwards. Then, as now, celebrity endorsements helped; Pliny observes that the use of the plant was given a considerable boost by Livia’s recommendation. In some modern quarters it is still promoted as an effective tonic and laxative.

…These curiosities do provide a possible context for one of the charges levelled against Livia, which the scholarly world generally agrees was groundless: that of using poison to remove those who blocked her ambitions. The accusation is one that powerful women in competitive political situations throughout antiquity and the middle ages found difficult to refute, because poison has traditionally been considered the woman’s weapon of choice. Because women took the primary responsibility for family well-being, they would have been the inevitable targets of suspicion if a person died of something brought on by gastric problems. If Livia had insisted on inflicting her home cures on members of her family, it is not difficult to imagine that a malign reputation could have arisen after a death that was advantageous to her. One also should not discount the possibility that the combination of birthwort and ash of swallows did more harm than good, and that she might indeed have helped despatch some of her patients, despite the very best of intentions. 

Allied to Livia’s preoccupation with herbal remedies is her passionate interest and regular involvement in various aspects of horticulture. The most vivid illustration of this comes from her villa at Primaporta . The highlight of the complex is the garden room, built and decorated around 20 bc in the form of a partially subterranean chamber nearly 12 metres long by 6 metres wide, perhaps a dining room intended for summer use. The most impressive feature of the room is the magnificent wall painting, unparalleled for its scale and detail. It creates an illusion of a pavilion within a magical garden, teeming with flowers and birds. Unusually for the Pompeian Second Style of painting, all structural supports have been dispensed with, even at the angles, although along the tops of the walls there is a rocky fringe, which conveys the impression of the mouth of a grotto. In the foreground stands a wicker fence. Behind that is a narrow grassy walk, set with small plants, bordered on its inner side by a low stone parapet. A small recess is set in the wall at intervals to accommodate a bush or tree. 

Behind it stands a rich tangled forest of carefully painted shrubs and trees, with various types of laurel predominating. The rich mass of foliage is framed at the top by a narrow band of sky. The painting is detailed and accurate, with flowers and fruit and birds perched on the branches or on the ground. The birds, of many species, range freely, with the exception of a single caged nightingale. Flowers and fruit of all seasons are mingled together. This rich extravaganza belonged clearly to an owner who exulted in the richness and variety of nature. But Livia’s horticultural interests went beyond a mere feast for the eye—she had a direct and practical interest in produce. She developed a distinctive type of fig that bore her name, the Liviana, mentioned by agricultural writers and recommended by Columella and Athenaeus, and which may have contributed to the tradition that she eliminated Augustus by specially treated figs grown in their villa at Nola.“

- Anthony A. Barrett, “The Private Livia.” in Livia: First Lady of Imperial Rome