#and she is one of the funniest deadpan characters

[microphilia]

the true protagonist of echotrance book. kienan i’d do anything for you

[thechekhov]

Dungeon Meshi Quick Reacts: CH38

Rip to these promising mages. I assume they will not survive this massacre.

IS that where her lungs and kidneys are? Because like. She's huge. Her entire body is behind her. Do you really think she'd keep her vital organs in the little human bulb on the front?

I mean, he has a point. What are you going to do? Fight off more hoardes of dragons?

oh noooo, Kabru.... too bad. That's so unfortunate.... anyway.

It's curious that Laios only got knocked away. He was just as likely to have had his head squished like a grape.

Guys, this is absolutely not the time to be concerned for her privacy.

Yes, queen. Free the tiddy. Murder everyone in this dungeon. I support women's rights and women's wrongs.

.......that's. One way to do that. I guess.

.......what's that rock about.

Oh, I see. That's convenient.

This guy dungeons! Maybe he even dragons.

So we got north (tallmen? dwarves?) and then the easterners.... and now the elves of the west?

He's going to give her to the Americans?! ಠ_ಠ

To be fair, at least they HAD a plan. And they executed it. It's more than you did. I don't mean to point fingers but... at least they... ya know... did something.

Kabru's like 'no, no, hang on, I need to hear what batshit fucked up thing this dude is going to say next, this is important'

Laios is so stressed he broke character.

Then again, maybe it's healthy to let them slug it out a bit. Get it out of their system.

It's true. They wore fitbits and everything.

...hey, hold on a second.

Now hold on a minute.

Damn, this is. Kind of even worse because. I guess I could have guessed that Toshi was just pretending to be polite, like you do. Cultural differences.

But the painful thing is, Laios doesn't seem surprised. He just seems resigned. He's been told before that he's difficult to get along with. To the extent that he doesn't even consider Marcille and Chillchuck his friends? Even though they arguably both care about him? But because Toshiro didn't bother to be deadpan about him being a bit odd at times, Laios thought it meant that was fine.

And that kinda hurts. Like damn. Laios just wanted to make a true connection. And I can't really blame Toshiro either, he was just trying to keep the peace but. Damn.

Free her! Let her do her illegal magics! She deserves it! （︶^︶）

Thoughts:

Senshi just being annoyed about that one last harpy looking for scraps.... like "shoo, this ain't the time"

That gnome seems genuinely nice. I'm sorry Falin squished his pet undyne.

Kabru hugging his..... mage? Girlfriend???? Seems very...one sided. Kinda feel bad for her.

Laios and Toshiro still going at it, I see. Get it allout, boys.

Uhhhhhhhhhh ninja girls.

Aww, doggo.

Last question: Where did the cat go?

Senshi: I can fix that.

Are you all worried because he's finally making sense?!?!

Laios and he punched their singular braincells into several new ones, it seems.

F./....Falin... please give the caterpillar some privacy........

My man, maybe lead with that............

I can't believe Marcille was potentially more forward about her feelings.......

"his pupils are dilated" yes, thank you sherlock. You've finally realized what everyone else who meets Laios feels almost immediately. he's a monster freak club card carrying member. Welcome.

p.....pubby......

As long as he was also inside the dungeon with them.... yes.

The issue with Kabru isn't that he isn't trying his best. It's that Laios isn't trying at all.

On a scale of one to Kabru, how badly do you react to being offered a food you don't want to eat?

......oh no. He's so pathetic it's funny. He's growing on me.

Absolute morons, the pair of them. Immovable object meets unstoppable force. The funniest combination ever. Ghost type and normal type pokemon, forever throwing moves at each other that will never hit. Laios thinking he's made a friend. Kabru just barely stopping himself from killing Laios. Best comedy pair. Tom and Jerry in a can.

Anyway. What a great manga.

[bestworstcase]

do you have any thoughts on The Hunter’s Children? when i read it my immediate reaction was “this has to mean strq reunion” (and i have been banging that drum for years now) but i’m curious what you think about it

in general i read fairytales of remnant as an ozpin character study so i tend not to have STRQ at the forefront of my mind (see also: ‘the warrior in the woods’ was not originally about a silver-eyed warrior), and my immediate reaction to the hunter’s children was to look at this:

“No,” said the younger sister. “We need to study the Grimm, so we can figure out better ways to protect against them.” […] The younger sister ventured into the woods near her village and built a structure high on a tree branch from which she could observe Grimm safely. Whenever one came near, she calmed herself enough to avoid its attention while she made careful notes and sketches. But studying the Grimm in this passive state did not provide useful information about their strength and abilities in combat. […] “I was wrong. The best way to learn about the Grimm is by fighting them,” said the younger sister.

and then this:

This is one of my favorite fairy tales, and I include it here not only because its messages still resonate today—perhaps more than ever—but also because the hunter’s four children bear a striking resemblance to the four-student teams at each of our Huntsmen academies. One wonders if the king of Vale had this story in mind when he established them after the Great War.

and then exchange a meaningful glance with the corner of my brain where i just replay WOR: grimm on a continual loop and crack the fuck up. ozma modeled the curriculum of his academies on a story whose overt moral includes "scientific study of the grimm is a waste of time and useless, the right way to learn about them is killing them." and in the end killing is all that matters………

OUR marvelous capacity to learn from the experience of fighting grimm; THEIR perverse form of self-preservation making them more effective killers. salem is the funniest fucking person alive

also considering ozpin says it’s his "favorite fairytale" (and thus probably one he either made up in the first place or has retold often enough to have shaped the traditional narrative) and his CONSTANT PROJECTION,

“Because I hate the Grimm for killing your mother,” the hunter might answer. “And I hate myself for not being there when she died.” Dinner conversation was silent on those nights until one child would ask softly, “Tell us about Mother again.” And soon they would be sharing their favorite memories of her, such as her sharp sense of humor, her beautiful singing voice, and her gentle but firm hand in guiding their combat training.

<- this is about salem. or more specifically, it’s ozma’s grief and remembrance of salem refracted through an allegorical story about a man who couldn’t save his beloved wife from the grimm. (which. lmao.) and well. the lost fable begins with salem humming, and her way of teaching and training cinder is not far off from a twisted "gentle but firm" approach. that’s 2 of 3, and 3 of 3 taking into account her occasional moments of WITHERING DEADPAN SARCASM esp in narration and the "your mother said those words to me"/"hm! her again? :)" attitude she has adopted about these girls’ mother being her general and the "hm! you certainly do enjoy collecting assets!" gently ribbing cinder and the nasty "she thinks… she wants…" bit when she uses her sarcasm for evil. and "perhaps you and i can have a better working relationship :)" LISTEN TO ME. SALEM IS FUNNY. HUMOR IS HOW SHE COPES. OZMA MISSES HER JOKES…

ahem.

that said, rereading the story again i do see where you’re getting the STRQ parallels / reunion foreshadowing because yeah it’s.

younger sister: her semblance suppresses or banishes emotion with waves of "overwhelming calm," she uses it to go… live among the grimm…

younger brother: his semblance lets him hide in plain sight by closing his eyes, but grimm can still sense his presence; he stumbles around "safe" but blind until the younger sister rescues him.

older sister: her semblance leads her toward whatever she needs most, which in the story this turns out to be her younger siblings. she pledges her service to protect the village, but the grimm are so numerous and the villagers so upset that they’re forced to adopt a nomadic lifestyle to stay safe.

older brother: his semblance allows him to create a shared pool of aura between large groups of people connected by a rope; he travels around until he finds a surviving village and becomes their champion until they, too, are overwhelmed and forced to flee.

if summer willingly joined salem, then… yeah all four of these characters map very neatly onto team STRQ.

summer joined salem and learned from her how to tame / command / ally with / otherwise live safely among grimm; she’s the younger sister.

"bravado" is a description that suits tai’s character quite well, and when he’s "alone in the forest"—left by raven and summer and qrow—he winds up lost and blind, depressed, and he’s (emotionally) trapped there still, surrounded by grimm that have overrun vale and patch.

raven’s semblance links her to her family so she can always get to them; there’s some resonance too between the older sister’s leadership of the village and the branwen tribe in that the branwens need to stay on the move because, as bandits, they’re walking grimm bait. and the older sister is left behind, which is… pretty clearly how raven feels toward the rest of her team.

qrow as the older brother on the surface seems like he’s the odd one out but…considered metaphorically, the older brother’s semblance makes him weak when he is alone and strong with the support of a community, which is qrow’s emotional arc exactly; and the older brother also travels the world and (literally) binds people together, which, gestures at qrow telling yang where to find raven and bringing RNJR into the loop and so forth. also the clover pin semblance key change in v8.

…gonna put this one down as another tally in the "tai’s 'assignment' keeping him away from vacuo is summer" column.

[fairytale-poll]

ROUND 1C, MATCH 9 OUT OF 16!

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Touya:

His performance as Cinderella in his school play is played for laughs, but the thing I really appreciate is that the comedy comes from how ill-fitting his personality is for the character, not his gender. The episode was funny, sure, but it was also surprisingly progressive for a children's anime from the 90's (then again, so was the rest of the show haha). Also he's the only Cinderella who gets sent to the ball by a talking can of mackerel.

Saki:

Psychic goth girl who was cast as Cinderella in a school play. The play was so poorly cast overall that the entire script had to be rewritten, thus “Cinderella-ish” was born. Hanajima played a Cinderella dressed in all black, and when confronted by the fairy godmother, she simply wished for meat.

idk if this is what you meant by 'acting' as Cinderella but in-universe she got cast as Cinderella in the school play, and the characters ended up re-writing the entire play to work around her because she was too Goth and disinterested to play a classic Cinderella character.

She plays the best version of Cinderella. All she cared about was going to the ball for the barbecue. The episode she's in is a really good one as well.

Overall Saki is not a Cinderella character, but you did say we could submit them if they were Cinderella in an in-universe play, and that she was! In Season 2 Episode 23 "It's Cinderella-ish", her class puts on a production of Cinderella and she ends up getting cast as the titular role, which a lot of other characters think is crazy because she's this straight-faced, emotionally-repressed, exclusively-wears-black kinda girl. Also her best friend Tohru (the anime's protagonist) gets cast as an evil stepsister, and she's one of the sweetest people ever and has so much trouble being mean to Saki even fakely and vice versa. Of course, Saki has no problems being rude to the Prince Charming character in the play, played by Kyo, a guy who's sweet deep down (but only to Tohru and his adoptive father) but is other wise a hot head who's always getting into fights. So between Saki as Cinderella having a genuine love for her stepsister and a general animosity with the prince, in addition to the fact that when she goes to the ball, all she wants to do is eat, not mingle, she makes for a very interesting Cinderella.

so this shoujo series has a storyline where the class puts on a Cinderella play but instead of the heroine playing Cinderella, shenanigans happen that lead to the heroine's goth best friend, Saki Hanajima, aka Hana-chan, aka Demon Queen, playing the lead role. Hana-chan's Cinderella dresses in all black against the wishes of the play's director, does not give 2 shits about the prince, and is just a general menace to society. I know she's probably not gonna win but I just wanted to share her with all of you bc I love her and the Cinderella-ish arc is to this day some of the funniest shit I've seen in a manga

their high school class decided to randomize who played which characters in their production of Cinderella & the creepy goth girl got cast as Cinderella & her painfully kind-hearted bestie got cast as the evil stepsister (among other mismatched roles) so they rewrote the play into "Sorta Cinderella" & Cinderella became a deadpan, lazy girl who only wants the best for her darling step-sister & who only went to the ball for the food.  in the end, instead of marrying the prince she takes his money & opens a restaurant with her sister & I love that for them <3

[coldflasher]

Fandom ask: DC LOT?

whew im so late responding to this one, i was sooo late clocking off work tonight 😭 anyway

Favourite Female:

There were many incredible women on Legends but I think Zari 2.0 cinches it for me!

Favourite Male:

John Constantine my beloved... im a sucker for a terrible bisexual man

3 Other Favourite Characters:

Leonard obviously... he'd have been my number 1 but I feel considering he was only really in season 1 he barely counts as being on the show in my opinion

Martin Stein!! I love that old man :( his death is still up there with the saddest tv deaths of all time for me

Aaaand I probably have to go with Mick for my number 3! His truly bizarre character development from violent pyromaniac to successful romance novelist with a clutch of alien babies born via ear might be one of my favourite twists of all time and it's genuinely so impossible to describe it to anyone who hasn't seen the show. Flash Mick and Legends Mick are absolutely not the same man but Legends Mick is so much fucking funnier

3 OTPs:

John and Zari Tarazi

Zarlie

Avalance (basic of me I'm afraid but what can I say I genuinely think they're really cute)

Notp:

Nate/Zari 💀 they make zero sense to me

Behrad/Astra (same, and also the writing for that ship is sooo dodgy cos one half of the writers' room was gunning for it and the other half didn't give a shit and you can really tell which writers were writing which episodes imo)

Funniest character:

Ava! Jes Macallan's comedic timing is unmatched and some of the funniest moments of the show hinge on her deadpan line delivery. Shoutout to "I wrote that review 😐", the episode where she writes Sara a card saying she's glad Oliver is dead and wishes Sara had never met him (I usually hate the "lesbian character despises her bisexual girlfriend's male exes" trope but I gave them a pass for that one cos it was genuinely very funny), and the time she just goes "goodbye!" and liea down in the middle of the road

That being said, the hardest I have ever laughed at a joke on Legends was the dad joke that Damien Darkh makes in the ep where John and Nora fake an engagement. It was during the peak of the pandemic. Me and my friend were locked in our tiny 2 bed student house rewatching all of Legends on my laptop because we didnt have a TV. we hadnt left the house in days because of all the restrictions, literally all we did for like a straight week or two was watch legends. and something about this dad joke ("Hi annoyed, i'm dad!") caught us so off-guard that it literally made us cry laughing, like that full-on painful, can't even breathe kind of laughter, for about 10 solid minutes. i can't even explain why it was that funny!! whenever i have seen that episode since, that joke has never got more than a giggle out of me. but at the time we were absolutely howling.

Prettiest character:

charlie is genuinely so beautiful (and having met maisie in person i can say that they are even more indescribably beautiful in person and have the most calming presence)

Most Annoying Character:

I don't want to jump on the Mona hate train cos poor Ramona got treated terribly by the fans but Mona was... not my fave. She got shafted by terrible writing. In my opinion her annoying characterization was 100% fixable with some good development but they just chose to write her out instead? Cowards.

Most badass character:

It has to be Sara, I feel!

Character I’d like as my BFF:

Honestly I'm not sure I'd personally get on with literally any of them 😭 I love them all but I'm not sure our personalities would gel. That being said I think I'd say Ray because he seems like an easygoing man and I think you'd have to actively try to not get along with him.

Female Character I’d Marry:

I'd say Charlie but she is too wild for me. She'd defo get bored and we'd end up having to divorce. I'd probably go for Ava... I'm not sure we'd be a good fit personality-wise but I appreciate her risk aversion and I need that kind of organized presence in my life. She'd probably also divorce me though, on account of the fact that i am not organized at all.

Male Character I’d Marry:

Again I feel Ray is the only safe choice here. John may be my fave but I would 100% end up dead if I married him because he has terrible luck with relationships. Also he tends to lash out and be horrible when he's experiencing difficult emotions and I am way too sensitive for that shit lmao. Also he smokes and that's a dealbreaker for me (I say, having previously dated a smoker. Must stick to my convictions next time.)

Character I hate/dislike/least like:

you know that meme that's like "I love all my children equally." *jumpcut* "I don't care for Michael" (or whatever the guy's name is)?

That's me with Behrad. They just shoehorned the guy in and I fear I need a few more personality traits other than "stoner" for me to be interested. They never gave Shayan anything to work with really and it's a shame cos Behrad could have been so interesting...

[sporesgalaxy]

Which character do you think would be the funniest to put in the old Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog cartoon? Because knuckles was the closest, but I think Shadow would be really funny

Ok Shadow would be PRETTY GOOD!!!!!!! but ONLY if you translate him into the show's looney toons tone by having him be like. Completely deadpan but still 100% capable of wacky antics and snark when you least expect it. Real "No One Will Ever Believe You" type shenanigans, or else throwing Sonic for a loop by "keeping up with him"-- playing along with the gag or else redirecting it. Stuff Eggman and his robots either don't bother to do or tend to fail miserably at.

Because otherwise he falls into the Serious Tryhard loony toons archetype, who always just gets his ass kicked, and at that point it would just feel like MORE making fun of Shadow for being "the edgy one," when I feel like the juxtaposition between his outward edginess and inward niceness has ALWAYS been the TRUE draw of his character.

ALL THAT SAID, I RAISE YOU: AMY! but, you know, in a PERFECT reality where she would get to be wacky in a way more FUN than just blatantly misogynist. I think the Sonic Boom cartoon and IDW comics have shown some of her comedic potential outside of just being a Silly Infatuated Girl, and I can only dream of the fun she might have had turning robots into accordians with her giant hammer, and maybe also dropping pianos on people or foiling traps by being heinously strong. smiles serenely.

[musclesandhammering]

aside from anderson cooper do you mind giving us your Thoughts on other pundits/journalists?

Oooh boy. I love you for indulging my 2 decade-old hyperfixation.

Well first off, I don’t actually watch much legacy media for news purposes. They all have the same corporate slant and, while I don’t hold it against the individual pundits/journalists, I’m aware that the info they’re presenting is highly cherry-picked and biased toward the establishment and teaming with false neutrality bs so.. you know.

I got started watching cnn because I remembered being a little kid and seeing Anderson Cooper on tv when my parents were watching Katrina coverage or whatever. So I started watching him and then went back and watched some older stuff etc so… he was the initial deal. I just sort of started following other pundits for fun because of their proximity to him.

Also, disclaimer that I strongly prefer his older tv persona (war reports, snarkiness, grunge aesthetic, etc) and most of the PRT fandom content I’ve found has been from like 2005-2010 anyway so… most of these opinions are based on an outdated media sphere lol.

With all that being said…

When it comes to semi-modern stuff, I love the whole cnn crew. I think they’d be hilarious in a mocumentary a la The Office or something. John Berman is the funniest guy on the network and Jake Tapper has the best deadpan. Don Lemon was annoying and endearing at the same time. I never liked Chris Cuomo. He seemed pretension and way too dudebro-ish.

As far as PRT people specifically, Stephen Colbert is an absolute treasure. He’s ridiculously smart and quick witted but he’s never needlessly harsh like some late night hosts. I like him now better than when he was on The Colbert Report because he doesn’t have to play a character all the time and can just outright say what he feels.

Jon Stewart is probably the most progressive host on mainstream tv, which of course makes him delightful. He also has a way of calling out mainstream journalists without making it personal. And I still remember the time he went on Crossfire and humiliated Tucker Carlson <3.

Rachel Maddow seems like the coolest person in the room at all times and she’s so incredibly smart. But she has this thing where she seems to recognise (and call out) the conservative tendencies of other networks like cnn without realising that msnbc is no better when it comes to corporatism, upholding the status quo, and being anti-progressive. In fact, that’s something everybody on msnbc does, not just her. But I still have a soft spot for her though.

Keith Olbermann is the guy that used to be outspoken leftist champion in the very early 2000s- getting righteously angry when other dems were obsessed with decorum, clapping back at Fox pundits who tried to smear him, and saying things the dem establishment didn’t always want said. But somewhere between then and now he revealed himself to be a weird, immature, somewhat narcissistic asshole who can’t take any criticism and has somehow morphed into a centrist defender. It’s one of the most disappointing downfalls of the fandom. But despite all that, I still think of the day msnbc fired him as a national tragedy.

And I’m glad he got what was coming to him, but from a rpf perspective, I miss when Bill O’Reilly was the main villain 😂.

[theveryconfusedartistsart-blog]

Flowey's Funniest Home F Ups

(Contains MAJOR spoilers for my fics, Growing Pains 1 and 2) Basically, little scenes from throughout story where Flowey accidentally does something stupid and it ends up biting him in the metaphorical ass (BUT it's more funny than depressing)

Interestingly, I noticed there were more of these types of scenes in GP 2 than in the first one, he gets VERY humbled in a more physical comedy sort of way.

Growing Pains 1, Chapter 2

Flowey summoned up a spikier vine to guard him, to which the girl nimbly backed up from before she could run face first into it.

“Apologize first!” Flowey snapped back.

“Apologize for WHAT?” she argued, she too was beginning to look like she was about to cry, mainly out of frustration.

But apparently wasn’t as frustrated as much as Flowey was as he lost his patience and slammed a basketball hard into the side of her head, she immediately fell to the grass.  .   .  .

 He stopped everything when she didn’t get up fast enough; noticing her eyes were closed, he stared carefully, fear twisting inside of him. .  . 

The fear rose when the others quickly became aware of the scene, he could see the anxiety in their eyes, the hushed whispers between them as they stared at the scene. .  . 

 He was beginning to call it quits as the sickening dread spread through him and worsened, if the others found out that he killed a human or severely hurt one they’d probably lock him back in the Underground or… worse.

All he wanted was to teach these brats a lesson they’d never forget, not kill them. . .

Then! To his relief, the girl suddenly groaned and rubbed at her head and shot up back to her feet.

“Done napping?” he quipped, quickly brushing the incident off as if it were nothing.

____________________

Growing Pains 1, Chapter 2

“You have to talk to me, you can’t ignore me forever. We live together for fudge sake!” They said, talking to his back while he was pretending to be busy playing his zombie game.

“…,”

“Look I’m sorry for outing you to mom, but you know she deserved to know you were alive, dad too, besides, you know they were eventually going to find out anyway, I know you try to hide it, but you still sort of look like yourself, I know that doesn’t make any sense but- it’s true,”

“…,”

“If you’re a grumpy jerkwad who beats up people with basketballs say nothing,”

Finally, Flowey shot around inside his flower pot to look at them so hard he nearly knocked himself over, his face seething with anger, “ME?! YOU THINK I’M THE JERK?! I TOLD YOU I DID IT FOR YOU!”

_____________________

Growing Pains 1, Chapter 2

His bad mood was getting worse and worse “what are you TALKING ABOUT?! I’ve told you, I don’t HAVE a soul- WHICH MEANS I CAN’T CARE ABOUT ANYONE! This is a stupid pointless conversation! Don’t you understand that taking me a therapist isn’t going to work?! I bet you’re just doing this to make you feel better about yourself!”

Toriel remained calm though, if anything, she seemed almost intrigued “but if you do not have a soul, then why did you want ‘revenge’ on the other children that bullied Frisk?”

But stubbornly, Flowey was no longer listening, “LALALALALALALALALALA!!! I’m not talking about this anymore! This whole thing you call a ‘conversation’ is as stupid and idiotic as you are, you OLD. UGLY. HAG!!”  

 “ASRIEL!” Frisk gasped loudly in disbelief, glaring at him in disgust.

____________________________

Growing Pains 1, Chapter 3

Once Frisk was finished they finally looked back at Flowey, whom had been distracting himself by making tiny airplanes out of the sticky notes, catching him in the act of aiming a plane at them, one eye squinting in concentration.

The little teenager cracked an amused grin as the airplane flew off and immediately began to crash way too soon, falling to the floor between the two.

Flowey’s face went deadpan serious, “look at what you did.”

Frisk didn’t fight the giggles that came out, and it forced Flowey to break character and crack a shy smile.

_____________________________

Growing Pains 1, Chapter 21

Frisk sighed glumly, "I miss the Shopkeeper, she's so nice and pretty, mom, we should really go back for a visit sometime,"

"Of course Frisk, oh and that reminds me, Flowey, when will you visit the Underground again? It's been so long since you left, don't you miss it at all?" Toriel asked.

Flowey licked a bit of marshmallow from the side of his cheek, "nope! Hahaha."

Toriel paused at his answer, leaning forward to get a clear, careful look into his eyes "...dear… just how many s'mores have you had?" she asked with a skeptical frown.

"Just one, I think I need- s'more!" Flowey replied with a giggly toothy grin.

Toriel and a few others giggled, but Papyrus gasped, "YOU NEVER MAKE PUNS, WHAT HAS GOTTEN INTO YOU MY FRIEND?" and then, as he looked closer, he noticed a small plastic bag that Flowey was hiding behind a blanket close by, and with a quick snatch, he held it up in the air.

It was the second bag of backup marshmallows, and by the looks of it, Flowey had managed to eat half the bag while no one was looking.

"lots of marshmallow by the look of it," Sans quipped.

"Golly, not my marshstash!" Flowey said in a sudden surprise, but was unable to hold the frown and started laughing hard; the second pun causing Frisk to finally crack and join him in his laughter, unable to resist his silly behavior.

"Oh Flowey no! You know what too much sugar does to you! You are going to regret this later when that headache hits mister," Toriel lectured.

(Later that night…)

The downside to it was that he was unable to sleep due to the headache that was rearing its ugly head, he opted for closing his eyes and focusing on the gentle sounds outside, the slight shifts of everyone's slowing movement, quiet conversations he couldn't quite make out, the peaceful crickets, hushed giggles coming from Alphys that insinuated she was probably texting Undyne. . .

____________________

Growing Pains 1, Chapter 13

Frisk sighed, groaning to themselves "I should have just surprised you, I don't know what I'm thinking. Ugh, I feel so baaaaaad,"

"Go back to bed,"

"Read your book,"

"I don't feel like it,"

"Alice in Wonderland is a good book. Keep. Reading. It."

"Ugh,"

"You want to keep talking don't you?"

"Ugh," he did, but he really wasn't going to admit it.

On the other end of the line, he heard Toriel say something in a stern voice, causing Frisk to abruptly start talking again.

"Oh-! Never mind, queen of the house wants me to go back to bed too, like mother, like son… well, love you, talk to you later,"

"Love you too,"

There was a sharp pause over the phone. . .

________________________

Growing Pains 2, Chapter 2

He sat there for a moment, completely enchanted until he finally noticed he was staring and that Frisk hadn’t noticed he was there yet- oh, jeez, was this creepy? He hadn’t meant to spy!

He was quick to make himself known.

“Howdy I-,” he began but took a misstep with his roots and fell face-first into the carpet “ggghh, damnitall,”

Maybe too quick. 

Frisk jumped to their feet, brush still in hand as they hurried over to him, kneeling down in worry, ready to help as he worked to push himself back up.

“I literally just bathed,” he grumbled, rubbing at his face in annoyance.

________________

Growing Pains 2, Chapter 2

Toriel had taken Frisk out to do some clothes shopping, leaving the teen home alone and unchaperoned.

Everything was going fine until he found himself feeling peckish.

That in itself was also fine, heating up two… no, three simple easy to make frozen burritos, the big problem was a few minutes later after he finished his food and attempted to crawl back down the table when he lost his bearings and slipped off, falling down onto the hard floor below.

Usually, he was good and did well when it came to falling, he was lightweight so it was rare for him to get hurt from doing so, but this fall in particular hurt, a lot, maybe it was because of all of the extra burrito weight that he was holding inside himself or… the weird angle he’d fallen in, or… maybe it was from the armrest of the chair he’d smacked into on the way down.

 All he knew was that his head and left eye hurt and that he was dizzy and angry that no one was there to help him when he finally needed it.

He groaned in pain, he had felt worse, much worse than this, still, though, he was hurt and he was embarrassed he had fallen so unceremoniously.

…Maybe it was a good thing that no one had been here to see it happen.

______________

Growing Pains 2, Chapter 9

“Alright, as much I love chatting with crazy women, it’s time to get going, c’mon Frisk,” Flowey said quickly, hastily hopping out of the boat.

“I share the same feelings, I love talking to the local crazy women here, we usually get together and talk about annoying teenage boys who don’t know how to hold their tongues when they should,” Vise retorted.

 Frisk smiled nervously, “sorry about him again, I guess we’ll see you later?”

Vise nodded to Frisk, “you will, but not too soon,”

“Oh, okay, well thank you for the boat ride!” Frisk said and hopped off, running to join Flowey who already started rolling away.

And as they got a better view of him, they started giggling.

“What is it?” he asked, still slightly annoyed.

Frisk bit their bottom lip to stop themselves from letting out any more giggles, they then took out their phone, and with an easy ‘click!’, they snapped a picture of him.

They then showed him the picture, revealing that somehow, Vise had placed her orange on top of Flowey’s head, it was strangely a cute look for him.

Flowey gasped, reaching up to snatch the orange from off his head, and scoffed in annoyed amusement.

______________

Growing Pains 2, Chapter 11

It was then, up ahead in the distance on the road, he caught the glimpse of all too familiar car, Toriel’s car-

Instantly panicking and his mind running faster by the millisecond, he turned and left, running off the pathway and speeding into the grass, making a beeline toward the nearby overgrown bushes that towered over the both of them.

“What’s wrong? Where are we going?” Frisk asked with concern.

But he didn’t get to answer them as he made another turn, but it was too sharp and too fast-

-and due to the combination of physics and gravity-

-It threw Frisk off of him and straight into the bush, practically disappearing- except for their hat, which was grabbed by a branch.

“Agh! Holy crap!” he heard them shout in distress.

____________

(Growing Pains 2, The Entirety of Chapters 22 & 23)

___________

Growing Pains 2, Chapter 25

Sunday, the same kid came back, catching Flowey in the middle of shooting bees. 

“HAHAHA!” Flowey laughed as one exploded.

“You’re not supposed to do that, my teacher says the bees are dying out,”

“Heh, I hope so!” he said, then shot another, “I hate bees with a passion,”

“They’re helping to keep the earth alive, please don’t do that!” the kid said, getting upset.

Flowey looked over at the kid, “I’ll stop when they leave ME ALONE!”

At this, the kid backed up, “wait here… I can get you something, just please stop hurting them,” then ran off.

“Huh?” Flowey said, confused, “what are you going to get?”

“BUG REPELLENT!” the kid shouted back.

Flowey watched as the kid proceeded to get on a parked bike and fly off, disappearing from view.

Flowey then screamed in terror as a bee landed on his cheek, and he swatted it away and then proceed to shoot it dead, glaring down at the corpse with disgust.

After a few minutes, the kid came back, urgently spraying the bug repellent all around Flowey.

Once they were done, they handed it to him.

“Please don’t hurt anymore bees,” they said simply and ran off.

At this, Flowey only sighed, staring down at the bottle, reading the label and ingredients out of boredom, then proceeded to squeeze the trigger, accidentally spraying himself directly in the eyes and swearing obscenities in pain.

_________________________

Growing Pains 2, Chapter 25

Then, Flowey screamed and jerked back in fear as the loud sound of thunder instantaneously pierced into his brain, and then he jumped in the distance, lightning struck… catching a tree on fire.

He stared at the sight as the shock quickly faded, it was too far away to be an issue to him.

But he decided to take it as a sign, he needed to leave, now, before he was burned too.

At this decision, Flowey slid off the jungle gym, tunneling into the ground, going south. 

But after fifteen minutes, he heard the strangest sound coming from above… it almost sounded like… rushing water?

That was odd.

There shouldn’t be water in this area…

In his curiosity, Flowey began to climb to the surface, but as he did, he was abruptly grabbed and swept away by a strong current of rushing water, quickly solving his curiosity.

_______________________

Growing Pains 2, Chapter 30

Four hours later…

Flowey was currently mixing Frisk’s cake in a mixing bowl, humming nervously as he eyed the coo-coo clock on the wall.

Then he screamed as he accidentally splattered the mix onto his face and eyes, dropping the bowl in a panic-

[ourpickwickclub]

I sent in a version of this a few days ago but it might have been to mean. How did you girls all become friends? I want to make some shefani friends, but everyone I’ve tried reaching out to and get to know on Twitter haven’t been the nicest or very welcoming.

I didn’t see the earlier ask. I’m sorry people haven’t been all that welcoming. I think most everyone has experienced that sort of thing at some point and it’s not fun.

Our story is sort of interesting. We were all on Twitter but hadn’t interacted. Periscope existed then… talking late 2015/ early 2016 timeframe… and we were all watching Gwen and Blake on Periscope anytime they had a show.

So, we would kept seeing each other’s names. A and I would always comment the same thing at the same time. Over and over. L and M and J all made me laugh. J made one of the funniest comments ever at MLs expense (I mean, I laughed for days anytime I thought of it and I’m laughing now thinking of it) and I knew she was my people. L and M both made such good observations and were hilarious and both funny in different ways. A was deadpan and the fashion and makeup expert.

I was actually at a concert in person and missed a Blake show on Periscope where something happened, I can’t remember what. But I reached out to M via DM (she always seemed so nice) and she filled me in. We started talking here and there and one day we decided we should see if L wanted to join. M and I had talked about bringing A and J into the group also. We didn’t tell L that but asked if her if there was anyone else she would want to have join our group chat and she said A and J’s usernames. How weird is that? Out of everyone commenting on Periscope, she named the only other two people M and I had talked about adding.

We added them and J, who never has been super active on the blog but is so hilarious, came right in when she got the request and said, oooooooh, what is this???? A didn’t see the request for a day or so, but joined when she did so casually. She just sauntered in one day, and started talking. No questions. A is so dryly matter of fact. It all just worked. We started planning an in person meet up almost right away.

I actually set up the blog because I needed to set one up for work and it was practice. We were all following the other Shefani blogs. J added our pics/theme. No one noticed us for a while. I truly believe the BARFs were the majority of our first followers. They lived to send in mean asks and pose as concerned Blake fans. We almost quit. It was tough because so many of the asks we got were negative. Any bad comment we made about ML triggered a lot of inbox pushback, which was a clue. But that made others send asks setting them straight. The same 5 BARFs sent tons of asks. Then, of course, we had Jigsaw. Has anyone been around long enough to remember Jigsaw? Creepy. We also did a lot of chart tracking back then.

It’s been a while since we talked about this, but we decided to sign with initials we ended up picking initials from Little Women characters. That’s how it became the pickwick blog. We’ve now met up a bunch of times with another meetup on the books soon. So excited!

Hope that clarifies. Still laughing thinking about it all that has transpired and the comments.

- B

[denimbex1986]

'Doctor Who celebrated its 60th anniversary with three special episodes airing across as many weeks, and each provided viewers with some great quotes from its characters. These specials mark the return of David Tennant, now playing the Fourteenth Doctor, and Catherine Tate, who reprises her role as Donna Noble. The two were last seen in the season 4 finale, "Journeys End," in 2008. The specials also see the surprising debut of the Fifteenth Doctor, played by Ncuti Gatwa, who wasn't expected to appear in the show until the 2023 Christmas Day special, "The Church on Ruby Road."

The three Doctor Who 60th-anniversary specials, entitled "The Star Beast," "Wild Blue Yonder," and "The Giggle," all feature memorable dialogue, including several quotable lines. Not only do the Doctor and Donna's exchanges bring some expected brilliant moments to the show, but there are also some entertaining comments from other returning characters, such as Donna's mother, Sylvia Noble (Jacqueline King), and the Doctor Who villain known as the Toymaker (now played by Neil Patrick Harris). With Doctor Who season 14 due to air in Spring 2024, there are sure to be more amazing quotes to come, but the 60th-anniversary episodes deliver enough great lines to tide fans over until then.

15. "Tuna Madras." - Sylvia Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Star Beast"

While Donna's mother doesn't feature too heavily during the 60th-anniversary specials, one of the best quotes from these episodes is spoken by her. The deadpan delivery of this line, as Shaun (Karl Collins) returns home from work to find his family panicking over an alien in their kitchen, is nothing short of hilarious. The entire scene gives off a deer-in-headlights atmosphere, and Sylvia's line is a perfect breaking point after Shaun's arrival before all hell breaks loose.

14. "No Such Thing As Spaceships? We've Got A Bloody Martian In The Shed!" - Donna Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Star Beast"

Donna Noble's return to Doctor Who shows that the character hasn't changed too much and, as has been established during her original run, always manages to miss the arrival of aliens on Earth. However, this doesn't last long, and she finds the Meep (Miriam Margoyles) in her daughter's shed. This scene is absolute chaos, but it sees Donna at her funniest, screaming as she attempts to pull the Meep off her leg.

13. "I Don't Just Fire Darts, Mate." - Shirley Anne Bingham

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Star Beast"

"The Star Beast" introduces Shirley Anne Bingham (Ruth Madeley), as well as the return of UNIT to Doctor Who, as she is the latest to hold the position of the Doctor's scientific advisor. Shirley is an ambulatory wheelchair user and this is to her benefit when she helps the Doctor against the Meep. Her ability to use her wheelchair to not only knock out the manipulated soldiers but also to blow a huge hole in a brick wall while uttering this line is nothing short of incredible.

12. "I Had A Subconscious Infracutaneous Retrofold Memory Loop, Making Me Act As Soft As You And Give Away £166 Million!" - Donna Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Star Beast"

When the Tenth Doctor (also Tennant) said his goodbyes before regenerating, one of his last acts was to leave Donna and Shaun a winning lottery ticket on their wedding day. "The Star Beast" reveals that they had won £166 million, but Donna gave her money away to charity. This quote shows off Donna's character and her hilarious reaction upon getting her memory back, only to shout at the Doctor, blaming him for her actions as she'd done so to be like him.

11. "Then... We Go... And Kick Its Arse!" - Donna Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "Wild Blue Yonder"

The Doctor Who special "Wild Blue Yonder" sees the Doctor and Donna dropped into the middle of hostile action and the TARDIS abandoning them. In a typical Donna fashion, her realization of the danger only motivates her, knowing she has to get back home to Rose (Yasmin Finney) on Earth. With her having been away from Doctor Who for such a long time, it's great to see Donna still as the head-strong and boisterous character that made her so brilliant 15 years ago.

10. "We've Got A Chair. That's A Good Sign. It's A Lifeform With A Bum." - The Fourteenth Doctor

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "Wild Blue Yonder"

It wouldn't be Doctor Who without the Doctor making an obvious comment. While "Wild Blue Yonder" is a Doctor-and-companion-only story, minus the brief appearance of Isaac Newton (Nathaniel Curtis) in the cold open, it sees great dramatic performances from both David Tennant and Catherine Tate. Plus, the Doctor identifying that the threat must be able to sit down is made even creepier when they struggle to find any further signs of life.

9. "So I Arrived In Southampton, Which Allowed My Mother To Say I Was A Problem From The Day I Was Born. And I've Not Come To The Edge Of The Universe To Discover I'm Still Dealing With That." - Donna Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "Wild Blue Yonder"

The Doctor Who 60th-anniversary specials dig deeper into Donna's backstory, and considering she has been such a prominent character in the show since its 2005 reboot, this was unexpected. Season 4 saw plenty of moments that indicated that Sylvia wasn't the most appreciative of her daughter, and even though it's clear that their relationship has improved since 2008, Donna clearly has some lingering issues on the subject. Still, it's great to see yet another classic Donna line that seems like a ramble about her life but ends up being something that helps her and the Doctor save themselves from danger once again.

8. "Although, Don't Say Companion. That Sounds Like We Park Him On The Seafront At Weston-Super-Mare." - Donna Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

Donna's casual remarks are one of the reasons why she's such a brilliant character, and her response to being referred to as a companion only proves this. On top of this, she's quick to check with Shirley if her comment is offensive or not, not wanting to insult anyone other than the Doctor in the process. Donna's ability to paint a picture with just a few choice words is hilarious, and it's not the only time she does this in "The Giggle."

7. "I'm All Sonic And Tardis And Time Lord. Take That Away. Take Away The Toys. What Am I? What Am I Now?" - The Fourteenth Doctor

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

While there are many funny moments in the Doctor Who 60th anniversary specials, one of the most dramatic comes from the Doctor in "The Giggle." David Tennant's portrayal of the Doctor's more solemn moments is just as strong as The Fourteenth Doctor as they were as The Tenth, and breaking his walls down to Donna once again shows that their friendship is just as strong as it was before. This particular quote also sets up the Doctor's fate at the end of the specials, and it's a refreshing moment to see the Doctor acknowledge his reputation across the universe.

6. "Well, That's All Right Then." - The Toymaker

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

One of the most intense scenes in "The Giggle" sees the Toymaker spill details about the Doctor's lives and companions since he'd last seen Donna, in the form of a creepy but accurate puppet show. The Toymaker's sharp tongue is quick to call the Time Lord out about what happened to his friends over the years, and even when the Doctor retaliates, he spits back at him. It's an interesting moment for the show, especially as nobody had ever really made the Doctor face his actions in such a way before, but without this scene, the Doctor might never have accepted that he needed to grieve properly.

5. "You're Gonna Be Someone Else. It Doesn't Matter Who. Cause Every Single One Of You Is Fantastic." - Donna Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

Donna's reaction to the Doctor regenerating in "The Giggle" is significantly different from the first time she'd seen it, way back in the season 4 episode "The Stolen Earth." This time, now aware of what would happen and having seen more of his incarnations as part of the DoctorDonna, she's quick to hold his hand and gently guide him through the process. This scene shows one of the most wholesome moments between the pair, proving that they are one of the best Doctor Who duos.

4. "Can You Pull?" - The Fourteenth Doctor

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

The Doctor's bi-generation is a huge shake-up for the format of Doctor Who and is particularly unexpected by the Doctor himself. Whatever is running through his head for him to ask this question must be interesting, but it leads to the arrival of Ncuti Gatwa's Doctor. It must also be quite an odd moment for Mel (Bonnie Langford) and Donna too, as being asked to pull could mean anything.

3. "Do You Come In A Range Of Colors?" - Donna Noble

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

In another one of Donna's classic remarks, she quickly points out a first in Doctor Who: Ncuti Gatwa's portrayal of the Fifteenth Doctor makes him the first actor of color to play the Doctor on Doctor Who, and the second to play a Time Lord, with the first being Sacha Dhawan's Master. Of course, Donna's playful way of acknowledging this is a great way of explaining this to audiences.

2. "You Can't Save Everyone." - The Fifteenth Doctor

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

Even though the Fifteenth Doctor only appears toward the end of "The Giggle," he still has some great lines of dialogue. What's unique about this version of the Doctor is his ability to look back on his past without any shame and face his problems head-on. It's refreshing to see the Doctor speak to himself, and to tell his past incarnation exactly what his companions had spent years telling him: "You can't save everyone."

1. "One Thing You Need In This Place Is A Chair." - The Fifteenth Doctor

Quoted from the Doctor Who 60th anniversary special "The Giggle"

With there now being two TARDISes, the Fifteenth Doctor points out exactly what is missing from both: a chair. The jump seat was a staple of previous versions of the Doctor's ship, and it did seem unusual that the new TARDIS didn't have one, especially as the Tenth Doctor had one in the design he'd had in his original era. Seeing as the new version is so much bigger compared to previous ones, surely Doctor Who's design team could find the room to squeeze one in.'

[thousand-winters]

Gimme them lines, pal!! ❤️😂💔🎬🫂

Heeeey there, friend!!! Hope you've been doing well 💖 Manifesting the best for you, these months tend to be a tough time.

❤️ Share one of your favorite lines.

You don't get context for this one because I'm still at the midly embarrassed about things I write in this one fandom, but we do share it, haha:

The boy knows the man would walk the tightrope if it meant helping him. He doesn’t know he would walk through fire for him. Not yet.

😂 Share your funniest line (or dialogue exchange).

Lines I keep showing people because I'm a loser that laughs at her own jokes:

"I just think it's weird! So many espers coming in to brag about their powers, what is this? Esper season?" "Don't ask me, I'm not an esper-t," Reigen deadpans, but he’s unable to stop his lips from curving into a self-sufficient smile. 

💔 Share your most heartbreaking line.

I'm very normal about Darius mourning his mentor, you see.

But the hallways continued standing. And so did Darius. And yet some days it still felt like the world had already ended. All of the emotions on his face practiced, faked. Always the talented little actor, he would say. It felt as if the one who had died had been Darius and not him. It had always felt as if it could be anyone but him.

🎬 Share the last line you’ve written.

“You don’t need my name,” She says, as if it had been loaded and ready to shoot in her mind already.  ‘Good’, Baylan thinks, feeling his chest surprisingly warm, ‘make me earn your trust. Don’t give anyone a chance to chew you and spit you out. Your very existence is already a defiance.’

🫂 Share a line (or dialogue exchange) that shows the relationship between two characters.

“Your hair is getting quite long, isn’t it?” “Uncle! I- I thought you were busy with your morning meeting.” “Never too busy for my own nephew,” The man smiles, and Hunter’s stomach churns for no discernable reason; he’s been looking forward to spending time with his uncle. Guilt, maybe?

Thank you for the ask!!! 💕 Always a pleasure to hear from you, friend.

From this ask game.

[fairytale-poll]

ROUND 2C, MATCH 5 OUT OF 8!

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Saki:

Psychic goth girl who was cast as Cinderella in a school play. The play was so poorly cast overall that the entire script had to be rewritten, thus “Cinderella-ish” was born. Hanajima played a Cinderella dressed in all black, and when confronted by the fairy godmother, she simply wished for meat.

idk if this is what you meant by 'acting' as Cinderella but in-universe she got cast as Cinderella in the school play, and the characters ended up re-writing the entire play to work around her because she was too Goth and disinterested to play a classic Cinderella character.

She plays the best version of Cinderella. All she cared about was going to the ball for the barbecue. The episode she's in is a really good one as well.

Overall Saki is not a Cinderella character, but you did say we could submit them if they were Cinderella in an in-universe play, and that she was! In Season 2 Episode 23 "It's Cinderella-ish", her class puts on a production of Cinderella and she ends up getting cast as the titular role, which a lot of other characters think is crazy because she's this straight-faced, emotionally-repressed, exclusively-wears-black kinda girl. Also her best friend Tohru (the anime's protagonist) gets cast as an evil stepsister, and she's one of the sweetest people ever and has so much trouble being mean to Saki even fakely and vice versa. Of course, Saki has no problems being rude to the Prince Charming character in the play, played by Kyo, a guy who's sweet deep down (but only to Tohru and his adoptive father) but is other wise a hot head who's always getting into fights. So between Saki as Cinderella having a genuine love for her stepsister and a general animosity with the prince, in addition to the fact that when she goes to the ball, all she wants to do is eat, not mingle, she makes for a very interesting Cinderella.

so this shoujo series has a storyline where the class puts on a Cinderella play but instead of the heroine playing Cinderella, shenanigans happen that lead to the heroine's goth best friend, Saki Hanajima, aka Hana-chan, aka Demon Queen, playing the lead role. Hana-chan's Cinderella dresses in all black against the wishes of the play's director, does not give 2 shits about the prince, and is just a general menace to society. I know she's probably not gonna win but I just wanted to share her with all of you bc I love her and the Cinderella-ish arc is to this day some of the funniest shit I've seen in a manga

their high school class decided to randomize who played which characters in their production of Cinderella & the creepy goth girl got cast as Cinderella & her painfully kind-hearted bestie got cast as the evil stepsister (among other mismatched roles) so they rewrote the play into "Sorta Cinderella" & Cinderella became a deadpan, lazy girl who only wants the best for her darling step-sister & who only went to the ball for the food.  in the end, instead of marrying the prince she takes his money & opens a restaurant with her sister & I love that for them <3

Mettaton:

The dress the voice the malicious intent to kill you what else could you want

i think it's awesome that this cinderella's fairy godmother is a mad scientist who made him into a sexy robot

[aokozaki]

God Hisui could have the potential to be the funniest girl of all time. Like, 100% effortless deadpan... it's actually super hard to play the straight man, but her own reactions to her jokes are only gonna be noticed by very close friends, anyway.

Like imagine that one tumblr post people keep doing as Super Danganronpa 2 characters:

Kohaku: Ooho! She's got that Wuthering Heights pussy! Hisui, flatly: Call that a Kate Bush.

[we-pay-for-everything]

Nancy Drew season 2, episode 15:

This episode's kinda of heavy. Dolores's story is a sad yet familiar one. Imo this was one of the few times they successfully highlighted a social issue in an episode. I don't quite understand how a couple of years studying mechanical engineering enabled the Reverend to do all that, though...

Apart from the reveal of Dolores's death, my favorite part of the episode was Aunt May's. "It's not a path if it doesn't go anywhere. That's a hole in the ground." is the funniest line in the whole series and always makes me laugh. Ace's deadpan delivery is so good too and looked absolutely adorable wearing Aunt May's glasses.

I don't have much to say about the episode except about the ending. Firstly, when the group took a picture, Ace and Nancy paired up like George and Nick did, which was a choice, and, secondly, when Nancy went up to her room Ace almost followed her. Thirdly, and this is the most important part, I don't quite understand how Nancy is acting so out of character? Maybe because Nancy should've found a way to save Ace and the people in the list of witnesses without recanting her testimony? Because she always has to magically save the day? But she had good intentions and all this drama feels grossly exaggerated. Nancy's questioning her whole life over this? What is out of character is that she's not trying to fix it. But, still, all of this is for the Wraith storyline and it's so forced imo. What the Reverend said was total bullshit too. A bad tree bringeth forth bad fruit or whatever, and a good tree brings good fruit? She said all that after almost killing a man in the name of justice? Pot, kettle. So Nancy did one bad thing but only bad trees do bad things? I'm probably not supposed to take it literally, and the Reverend was being encouraging, but honestly, what the fuck.

[standupcomedyhistorian]

Hey, everyone!

I'm doing better (although living on my own is WEIRD after being with my ex for 21 years), and I wanted to thank you all for your kind words and thoughts. I'm getting through this one day at a time, and I'll make it to the other side of the road. 🐔

Anyway, there was a recent list of best comedians in the 21st century in the Telegraph on the eve of the Fringe Festival, and some of my favorite comics were included! 👀

Here's the descriptions for those curious—I highly recommend all of these incredible comics, ESPECIALLY number 1:

44. Kate Berlant (my article about her and Bo; audience interviews for Kate coming soon!)

A warped mirror for millennial smugness, 36-year-old Berlant’s narcissistic persona and fast-paced, deadpan delivery have inspired a host of great younger acts ­(including Leo Reich). Her ­half-improvised, stream-of-­consciousness patter is a kind of thrilling comedy glossolalia, while her mind-reading routine is some of the funniest failed ­stage-magic since Tommy Cooper. The ­American’s luvvie-mocking ­Broadway show Kate (directed by Bo Burnham) arrives in London next month. Fight for a ticket.

16. James Acaster (my article about him and Bo)

It’s easy to take Acaster for granted – he’s constantly on panel shows and podcasts. But his 2018 stand-up shows (collected on Netflix as Repertoire) are works of borderline genius; baroque puzzle-boxes, all buried callbacks and high-concept whimsy. If he once seemed a bit aloof and impersonal, that mask fell with his most recent West End show: a confessional tour-de-force about being dumped by his girlfriend for Rowan Atkinson.

5. Tim Minchin (my article about him and Bo)

The kohl-eyed, frantic-haired ­Aussie already felt like the ­finished article when he parachuted into the 2005 Edinburgh Fringe with his sensational debut, which ­parodied teen popstar dreams with precision-tooled, beat-perfect musical numbers. Almost two decades later – after stage-musical success with Matilda and Groundhog Day – his live shows come with more ­contemplation and political edge, but that twinkly-eyed mischief is still there. Minchin evolves with age, and is all the better for it.

4. Maria Bamford (my article about her and Bo)

A critic once called Bamford ­schizophrenic. She corrected him: “That’s not my mental ­illness! ­Schizophrenia is, of course, ­hearing voices, not doing voices.” An ­impressionist whose vocal ­acrobatics are usually used to ­imitate her own family, Bamford can be surreal, confessional or ­staggeringly dark (especially stories about her time “in the psych ward”), but is always ­thrilling. Her rare ­performances – in her own front room, car parks, or to just one ­audience member at a time – are unique. Wildly original, and a crucial influence on countless young British acts, she is, to my mind, America’s greatest living stand-up.

1. Bo Burnham (my primer and SOOOO much more on my website haha)

Burnham is the 21st-century ­comedian. Recorded in his ­bedroom, the razor-sharp New ­Englander’s piano-driven songs made him a ­YouTube sensation by the age of 19, at which point, in 2010, he ­astonished British audiences with an almost bewilderingly precocious stage debut, Words, Words, Words. 

His follow-up, What, was better yet, a royal-flush hour of ingeniously sly musical, character and meta-comedy that was the undisputed hit of 2013. As he told me at the time, “I do hope my sort of frantic, the-floor-is-lava type of comedy is a mimic of what it feels like to be alive now.” Indeed it was, and, although panic attacks took Burnham away from the stage for some years, he blithely whipped up the acclaimed feature film Eighth Grade in 2018, and three years later returned to the public eye with the Netflix ­special Inside. 

This was locked-down comedy – as “live” as it could be at the time – about the misery, isolation and gnawing insecurity of being a young comic unable to perform, so finely observed, intricately ­constructed and beautifully ­written it made your head spin. In terms of capturing that bizarre moment, mining it for laughs, and speaking both to his own generation and to all of us imprisoned in our own homes, no one else even came close.

Congratulations, Bo! ✌🏼