#and playing video games or watching YouTube or doing art can only help so much with that

[m1lfandcook1es]

Ranting for a second in the tags on this, don’t mind me

[luvfy0dor]

Heyy, I was thinking about a concept with Fyodor (or whoever from BSD) having a streamer bf, but like, one of -those- streamers where every word they say can be quite questionable (in a “good” way/ironically). For some reason it amuses me to imagine it with Fyodor and Reader occasionally teasing him, calling him their ‘discord kitten’ or streaming for 5 hours (or more lol) saying nonsenses or playing video games instead of paying attention to Fyodor. What do you think?

“Get Off The Game ♡⁠˖” BSD x GN!Reader ੈ✩‧₊˚

╰┈➤ Fyodor Dostoevsky, Dazai Osamu

Warnings;

Description; BSD men with a streamer!reader

A/n; these are in headcannon form, I hope that's alright!!! I think Dazai or Nikolai would be a better person to have this occupation w so I also did headcannons for one of them

Fyodor Dostoevsky ★

• Fyodor thinks it's stupid at first, but when he realized you made money from it he learned to tolerate it. He wasn't too fond of the noise, though.

• I don't think he was too fond of the nickname 'discord kitten', always raising an eyebrow when he's called that, he also strongly dislikes brainrot cause what do you mean you're so sigma? No you're not, you're y/n. That's unrelated, but I thought I'd add that in there.

• "A discord what? Kitten? What even is that? I am nothing of the such."

• Catch him dead before he makes an appearance on camera, he much prefers to keep his business private. He doesn't mind you talking about him though, he loves that. He loves that people know you're already taken by him and that all those losers in your chat don't have a chance with you.

• Sometimes he'll watch your streams from a different room in attempt to understand your work and the art of gaming. He enjoys when you play horror games, especially the ones that get you thinking. He sometimes finds your facial expressions when you get jumpscared funnier than anything else in the stream.

• When it comes to the duration of your streams, Fyodor can entertain himself for as long as you need him to, but he can't help but feel like he'd rather be spending that time with you every now and again.

• He usually just takes the time to work on his DOA stuff, and occasionally he'll get so lost in it that he doesn't even realized you've finished with your stream and whenever that happens, you make some tea and go to fetch him to spend some quality time together, whether it's you laying in his lap while you both read a book or having a conversation about whatever comes to mind

Dazai Osamu ★

• Dazai is your #1 supporter since day one. There's a conversation going on about content creators? He's immediately bringing you up. You need new items for your set up? He's manifesting that said items go on sale ASAP!

• Oh my god, and he LOVES it when you get recognized in public. He's very prideful of you and likes that it's only him and a select group of people that get to see the real you outside of the camera frame.

• He, unlike Fyodor, does have an issue with the long hours, so he busies himself with the ADA and otherwise to keep himself from walking in and talking your ear off while you play your games for umpteen thousand people.

• He doesn't despise being called a discord kitten, but it does confuse him a little bit. But whatever, as long as you have 'my' in front of any name he doesn't care.

• Dazai watches your old streams when he's bored and can't help but giggle at the out of pocket or questionable things you say. He likes to watch the compilations of you on YouTube, too.

• Sometimes he'll quote you out of the blue.

• He doesn't like people trying to flirt with you or talk to you on the Internet as any partner wouldn't, so he is in the comment section of every post reading through individual comments. Type guy to see '❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥' comments on your posts and reply '🧯🧯🧯'

• All in all, Dazai is well received by your fanbase, especially the ones who don't try to romance you and are normal. They think he's funny and a good match for you.

A/n; I hope it wasn't to short!!! I thought it was a cutsey idea, I think Nikolai would be pretty similar to Dazai in this scemario.

[dr-spectre]

I watched this YouTube shorts video which has over 100k likes on it where it basically went "oh the Splatoon fandom is weirdddddd!!! It has weird porn in it guys!!! Isn't that crazy?!?! It's so toxic guys!!! They found ways to weaponise racism guys!! They are so vile about splatfests guys!!!! They are gooning to splatoon characters!!! They are kids!!"

I hate to break it to you dude but.... that's literally every fanbase in existence.

Every single fandom on planet earth has weird porn in it. Splatoon is no different. Is it fucking weird to goon over the player Inklings and Octolings as they are confirmed to be under 18? YES! VERY VERY WEIRD AND THAT BEHAVIOUR NEEDS TO GET CALLED OUT!!!!!! But a large majority of fans who engage in NSFW content are looking at the Idols and other adult characters, not the literal teenagers. Plus adult Inkling and Octoling ocs do exist, i should know BECAUSE I MADE MY OWN!!!!!

Also do not judge people's fetishes unless it's actively harming someone or it's illegal. That's wrong on so many levels. Stop making people feel guilty about what they are into man. If someone wants to make an NSFW art piece with Marie's feet then I'm not gonna judge them publicly for it. That's straight up rude and the guy in the video was basically doing that by showing some stolen fetishy art and adding an "eww" audio clip on it... Fuck off dude. Leave them alone.

He also got the release year of Splatoon wrong by saying 2013 instead of 2015.... Not the worst mistake but still... Kinda paints a picture on how much he truly cares about this franchise you know?

One of his points can be boiled down to "they are using splatfests as a way to weaponize racism." What the FUCK are you talking about? The last time i remember a Splatfest being toxic was in Splatoon 1 with CALLIE VS MARIE! THAT WAS REALLLLLLLL BAD! Other than that it's been friendly jokes and little jabs at the enemy teams. He fucking used this terrible video as a way to demonstrate his point too....

Every Splatoon fan on the planet doesn't like that video, It just comes off to me as so disingenuous.

Also fun fact! SPLATOON 1 TO 3 HAD UNDERLYING THEMES ABOUT RACISM WITH THE INKLINGS AND OCTOLINGS!!!!!! Splatoon 1 was about the introduction of that idea and it was very black and white with hints of grayness found in the sunken scrolls. Splatoon 2 was about making it more gray as Callie joined the Octarians and THE ENTIRETY OF OCTO EXPANSION!!!!!!!!!!! Splatoon 3 was the conclusion to that theme with DJ Octavio helping out the NSBS and Octolings co-existing with Inklings peacefully. But did he bring that up? NOPE!!!!!!!

Trying to paint the Splatoon fandom as some "toxic trojan horse" is just... fucking wrong. There are plenty of fandoms out there that are 100x worse than Splatoon's. The Splatoon community is extremely diverse and sure there are issues that need to fixed and yes there is racism. The Splatoon community is leagues above any other shooter game community by far. Play a bunch of quick play matches of Overwatch or TF2 to see what I'm saying. You're gonna be seeing the n word more times than a Quintin Tarantino movie.

Also he talked about peak character design in the Splatoon games, and the one character he mentioned was.... Big Man... The only male Idol and not anyone else. That just seems a bit.... suspicious to me...

[angelinasnotebooks]

Hate that my form of hyperfixation is consuming and not creating.

I think I've been falling in love with ideas my whole life. I see colors and concepts and characters, and I want every part of the illusion to play around my body and immerse my mind and soul. I thought growing up I would be an artist. When that mentally shattered, I moved on to thinking I would become an author. Now, however, I don't know what or who I'll be. All I know is that my brain never stops coming up with ideas. 

Yet, with all these ideas comes the possibility of creation. It's what I want, isn't it? I want to create these pictures and stories and share them with the world. So, why am I motionless in my pursuit to bring my mind to life? I have a library in my head. There's a girl in there. Her favorite color is blue. She doesn't know if life is worth living. I have an art museum there too. There's a portrait of a dying renegade, and a demon alter ego desiring joy. Then there's the realm of fandoms. The endless multiverse of continuations and alternatives.  

There's a lot going on inside my brain and imagination. Chemicals I do not understand and signals I cannot control. An abundance of beauty only an individual can conjure with their subjectivity. With no outlet for these thoughts and images, I find it all to be too much at times. Wings heavy on my back and flightless under the pressure. The ability to soar is there, but the weight within is burdensome.  

Every day I come up with something new. Some ideas are fresh while others are another line on the loom, but that is all they are. Thoughts. Ideas. Invisible whisps, webs, and wishes. It's as if the only part of my frontal lobe that works is that of imagination and complex thinking. I attempt short stories, painting, studying, chores, school projects, craft projects and I never get them done. Planning, time management, logical reasoning, and decision-making have all taken a backseat. I can't get any of them done, so I turn to what has already been done. 

I rewatch a favorite show. I read another fanfic. I click on a YouTube video and another. I scroll Tumblr. I read character analysis. I try on the clothes in my closet. I add shit to my wish list. I post photos from two months ago on my Instagram. I relate to autistic ADHD tiktokers. I pretend Pinterest will help me get my life together. I think about the MCU. I watch another comfort, crime, haunted, mythical series. I visit my AO3 bookmarks. I doom scroll whatever app I can get my eyes on. I turn thirteen again and either spiral into a depressive state or become infatuated with the Hunger Games--again.

The point is, I can't force my brain to work on the original ideas. Sitting at a desk with supplies doesn't get my hands moving. I fall numb waiting for my body and mind to comply with my intentions. So, I end up here again. Hitting a heart button to let other people know that their commentary and hard work have reached me, and I liked it.  

I don’t want all my ideas and universes to end where they are. I don’t want to minimize or invalidate my existence, or the experiences of others like me, by remaining artistically stagnant. I want my mind to be a visual tangible galaxy free to be roamed and explored. I want to have my heart in my hands, and I want to give it to every single person that I can. I want these thoughts, these precious ideas out of my head and into yours, dear reader. I don't want to consume; I want to create. If I'm going to go down the rabbit hole, I want to be the rabbit. The entrance maker. Not the lost girl I am right now. 

[zeondraws]

I always wonder why I have been so busy the past months but then I remember all the things I'm doing with SWTD:

(this is more of a thought post about my life/thoughts/feelings than a lore post! Ignore if you are not interested in this, I don't mind)

Taking Screenshots

Multiple recording sessions (for audio or funny moments, and so on)

Multiple playthroughs of the game

Doing an AU for some reason

Drawing the characters (much art)

Also learning how to use procreate, while my big tablet is packed away until November

Working on a video project

Learning how to use OBS

Datamining the gamefiles for more info with fmodel

troubleshooting fmodel because it's showing me the middle finger for the billionth time

learning how to use a dumper to get mappings file (to view files in fmodel)

learning how to install mods and learn how to use them

troubleshooting my pc or laptop because of my silly shenanigans

rebuilding the models in blender while simultaneously watching blender tutorials to understand what the hell I'm doing

read about TCR's other games and play them (I still have to play Little Orpheus)

Trying to research movies or any blogpost/YouTube posts regarding the game

Other types of research that I can't think of right now

Sharing results with others and discuss the findings to figure lore out

confusedscreaming.mp4

????

It has a lot of reasons why I am super determined and stubborn? when it comes to something I'm passionate about. (It's really hard to explain)

Family always dismissed my hobbies and didn't support me much for them. They often gave me false promises and made me wait for nothing

Often treating me like a baby, as if I can't think for myself. I had to fight a lot for my passions the past decade or so. Even dealing with a former coworker who was very manipulative and tried very hard to belittle me.

I can't even explain all the stress I had to endure because of my old job. Constantly monitored for mistakes, constantly shoved to a corner, freedom taken away, bullied, my feelings had been manipulated so much that I just.. had entire months where I cried every single day. And I'm not even kidding, I went to work in fear, I walked home in fear, I woke up in fear. I still remember that evening where I was so afraid of everything. I was so scared to even be in my apartment, I just balled my eyes out because it was too much at that moment.

Only thing that kept me going was my determination, hope.. daydreams. . and seeking out help (therapy, friends) and using the anger I felt for my coworker to work on my art/passions and show myself that I'm not worthless.

Sometimes my coworker would treat me badly on some days, so after I went home I used my anger and sadness to make art. Even if I sat there drawing for 5h. It did help me to improve a ton in my skills.

I think that event made me go through this journey of? self reflection and growth. It's wild how much happened after that.

Family wasn't helpful in this painful time period, one told me I'll end up alone, that I shouldn't talk to people online or that I should be happy to have a job (Talking to family is like talking to a wall). Or another family member who tries so hard to treat me like an object.

It fills me with anger, but they're all I've got. I thankfully have many friends I can go to when needed, but I wouldn't be able to fully abandon my family. It's probably because I felt so down when my mother passed away over two years ago. I haven't talked to her in years because of her mental condition, but her passing hit me badly.

I have struggled for a while to work on other skillsets because I was too afraid, doing videos, blender, drawing humans idk why, maybe no confidence in myself to try it out

.. Suddenly swtd gets released and my head does a 360 and is like "I'm going to learn all of this now, hold my bear". Using my obsession about this game to learn something new, which helped me overcome so many hurdles. Like the amount of times I threw myself out of my comfort zone while I tried to fiddle with the game.

Like, look at the difference in my human art

This is the first time I drew Muir like.. I forgot when I drew this, two months ago?

And then like this is from a few days ago

... *compares* I don't know how to explain the difference, I think there is one-

Like,. It's hard to compliment myself because of the sheer amount of stress I endured over the year. I've been out of the old job for 3 weeks now. I'm so glad I'm out of there.

I remember how I always wanted to draw an entire dragon, not just a bust. And look I ended up drawing one!! Ok with Roper's head but yea!

I think family difficulties and other events made me feel very detached from others. I never felt/feel like I belong anywhere. I moved so often that this feeling persisted. And it may persist for who knows how long. I only recently got a diagnosis, I have a form of depression, but it's somewhat mild. Hence why I'm still able to perform in daily tasks and work. Tho I don't want to use my condition as an excuse, I rather just want to show that I'm capable of something. That even people who struggle mentally can find success in what they do.

Life throws so many hurdles but I think I am slowly used to living in the chaotic environment. I keep drawing and work on my hobbies while I wait to move apartments.

I try very hard to change my mindset even tho my mind had been so used to the negative spirals. But I try to stay determined and keep on learning. I am not all knowing and I need to remember that mistakes are ok and that I need them to keep learning and have progress.

I've been pushing aside so many thoughts while I messed with the game. Even tho it's 2AM I needed a quiet moment to think about it all.

I am very open with my thoughts and feelings, it's what I usually do on my Instagram account when I post my art.

Tomorrow is another day to learn something new.

[krisp-xyz]

Found your work. You inspired me to take another shot at technical art and graphics programming. Do you recommend any specific resources for getting started and beyond?

Thanks so much! Really glad I could inspire you to do that bc graphics and tech art things are so much fun :D

(Also sorry for the late response. I've been a bit busy and was also thinking about how I wanted to format this)

I'm mostly self taught with a lot of stuff and have done lots of research on a per-project basis, but Acerola and Freya Holmer are two of my favorite channels for learning graphics or technical art things. Shadertoy is also an amazing resource to not only create and view other's shaders, but learn about algorithms and see how people do things!

While I don't have many general resources. I'll steal these resources for graphics programming that Acerola shared in his discord server:

For getting started with graphics engine development: DX11: https://www.rastertek.com/tutdx11s3.html OpenGL: https://learnopengl.com/ DX12: https://learn.microsoft.com/en-us/windows/win32/direct3d12/directx-12-programming-guide Vulkan: https://vulkan-tutorial.com/

For getting started with shaders: catlikecoding: https://catlikecoding.com/unity/tutorials/rendering/ the book of shaders: https://thebookofshaders.com/ daniel ilett's image effects series: https://danielilett.com/2019-04-24-tut1-intro-smo/

For getting started with compute shaders: Kyle Halladay: http://kylehalladay.com/blog/tutorial/2014/06/27/Compute-Shaders-Are-Nifty.html Ronja: https://www.ronja-tutorials.com/post/050-compute-shader/ Three Eyed Games (this one teaches ray tracing AND compute shaders, what a bargain!): http://three-eyed-games.com/2018/05/03/gpu-ray-tracing-in-unity-part-1/

I also wanted to talk a little bit about I do research for projects!

A lot of my proficiency in shaders just comes from practice and slowly building a better understanding of how to best utilize the tools at my disposal, almost like each project is solving a puzzle and I want to find the most optimal solution I can come up with.

This is definitely easier said than done and while a lot of my proficiency comes from just doodling around with projects and practicing, I understand that "just practice more lol" is a boring and kinda unhelpful answer. When it comes to projects like my lighting engine, I came up with a lot of the algorithm stuff myself, but there were certainly lots of details that I learned about from past projects and research like ray marching (calculating the ray intersection of a distance function) and I learned about the jump flood algorithm from a tech artist friend (calculating distance functions from textures)

Each new algorithm you learn in various projects ends up being another tool in your toolbox, and each project becomes a combination of researching new tools and applying the tools you've learned in the past.

One last example. I made a Chladni plate simulation in blender (that thing where you put sand on a metal plate and play noises and it makes patterns) and it started with me researching and looking up chladni plates, I watched youtube videos related to why the sand forms the patterns it does, which ended up being due to how the sound waves displaced the plane. I googled some more and found the actual equation that represents it, and used it to simulate particle motion.

Figure out some projects you want to do and just do some googling or ask for help in game dev discord servers or whatever. Lot's of research on a per-project basis is honestly how you'll learn the most imo :3

[skysometric]

so i tried to clickbait. here's how it went

clickbait is not a regular thing for me, because i'm not somebody who wants to "grow my channel." in all honesty, i really just want the video i invested time into making to hit something like 100 views. that, to me, is what "success" looks like – i've hit it with over half of my stream highlight reels so far, and all i want to do is maintain that same momentum. (any more views and the comment section starts to become a source of anxiety.)

unsurprisingly, my "successful" videos are about games that people actually want to watch. think like Mari0 having a niche creator community, or people who look up the true final boss in the latest Kirby game. videos that aren't as successful are about over-represented games like Splatoon, or games that are too niche or out-of-date like Frogger.

typically i have the luxury of making whatever videos i want, because i'm not trying to "grow." but the latest video i put out was a bit of a special case – i knew upfront that practically nobody would want to watch it, and i most likely wouldn't hit my usual 100 views. but i was also highly confident that this video would be fun to watch, a breezy 8 minutes of good laughs and silly commentary.

so i asked myself: how do i get people to watch a video that i'm really confident in, when that video is about Eragon for the PS2?

i really hope i never have to look at this box art again.

let's be honest – no layperson would actually sit down and watch a video about Eragon: The Movie: The Game. if i put that in the title, no matter how much i dress it up with "This Is A Bad Game Lmao," it's going to be crickets.

people who watched the stream or heard me talk it up would absolutely be interested! but that's not enough by itself to reach 100 views; previous videos have proven this, and i only have so many friends. if i want more eyes on it, i have to play the algorithm game – and i am not well-versed in the youtube meta, so i'm flying blind here.

i got to thinking. it's a video i'm confident in. it's short, snappy and sassy, exactly my style. i think people would love it, if they clicked on it. how do i get people to click on it?

…why not just be honest?

i can feel my blood pressure rising just looking at this.

it's a kind of heavy-handed title, honestly. it's a little too on the nose, a little too disrespectful of the viewer's tastes. it is also – or at least i hoped it was when i wrote it – extremely earnest about its intentions, and surprisingly compelling in an anti-invitation kind of way. "come see what is so bad that i would not dare speak its name." that kind of thing.

the thumbnail is also cute, which helps take the edge off. should've made the text bigger, but Oh Well. it's not like that's the most important part here – it's the title that carries this one.

but did it work?

it's complicated.

i mean, i hit my goal of 100 views! that's worth celebrating! it worked just enough to reach my usual metric of success. but only just.

to see exactly what i'm talking about, we need to look at watch time, rather than views.

views and watch time, respectively, for the first 24 hours of the video.

here's the stats for the first 24 hours of the video, before the algorithm picked it up. on the watch time graph (bottom) you can see a very strong stair-step pattern; each step is somebody who watched the whole video, while the tiny bumps show people who watched the first few seconds and clicked away.

now, the wild thing is… my stats are so low that i can see this at all! i can literally go and count the number of people who have watched the whole video. it has the effect of making me rather neurotic about my analytics, but that's a discussion for another day…

either way, the point is that we can see 10 or 11 people actually watched the whole thing, out of 35 views in the first day. this is a really strong proportion, and it's mostly because my friends are the first to watch the videos i put out. (i'm really glad you people like my nonsense 💙)

as mentioned, though, i don't have 100 friends. that's fine, youtube will find more eyes for my video once the algorithm picks it up.

the full set of impressions and views, respectively, with a line marking the first 24 hours.

by looking at the impressions you can see youtube's algorithm slowly kick in; it was quite the slow burn this time, and i think that's because i released the video on a weekend. regardless, we can see views tick up at the same rate as impressions, more or less, gaining almost 100 more views on top of the 35 views it got in the first 24 hours.

these views were mostly driven by the home screen:

by the way, which of you weirdos have notifications enabled for my channel? i mean, thanks! but why?

this means that people went out of their way to click on it; they were interested enough by my clickbait to say, okay fine, let's see what this nonsense is about. the clickbait more or less worked…

except that it didn't translate to watch time at all.

the full set of watch time, with a line marking the first 24 hours.

after the first 24 hours, a grand total of six people have watched the whole thing, out of the 100 more views it's gotten since! that's a lower proportion than most of my other highlights videos get on average.

we can break this down even further by looking at watch time specifically from people who found the video on their home screen, because YouTube lets you look at that:

kinda scary how granular you can get with this, honestly!

unlike the stair-step pattern mentioned earlier, the big slope in the middle of this graph is made of a bunch of people who only watched bits and pieces of the video. in other words, the slope represents all the people who clicked on it, figured out what the game was, and then stopped watching. so the clickbait did work, but it translated to very little meaningful engagement.

now, this could be for any number of reasons! folks who watched the video know that i started with a hook in the first 30 seconds, kept my introductory explanation brief, and then followed that up with all the best parts of the stream. i do think that, as a highlights reel, this is one of the strongest ones i've ever put together.

crucially, though, the title does not state that it's a stream highlights reel. and highlights reels are not everyone's cup of tea! maybe they were expecting a video essay, or some other kind of scripted video – something that was more discussion rather than reaction. maybe people got mad at the clickbait, so they clicked on it just long enough to get an answer and left out of spite! or maybe somebody gave my video a fair shake and just didn't like my style. i mean, it's whatever. people can like what they like.

like i said at the beginning, i'm not trying to Grow My Channel or make an empire out of this. all i really care about is one thing: if i put some effort into something and show it off to the world, i want a few people to see it and enjoy it. that's it! so when it comes to analytics i'm not looking at raw numbers, those don't matter to me. i'm looking for evidence that people like what i spent all that time making.

so my takeaway from this experiment is that clickbait is for people who like raw numbers. it'll get you clicks, sure, but those clicks are as vapid as clicks get. views don't mean much in the long run if viewers don't actually want to watch the video in the first place.

anyway, now that the algorithm has run its course, i've switched the video back to a standard title and thumbnail.

as you can see, eragon was an early adopter of youtuber face syndrome~

i like this way better, personally… but would anyone have clicked on it? who can say for sure.

this was a worthwhile experiment, though, and it reminded me of the whole reason i make videos in the first place – not to Build An Audience, but to preserve my memories in amber! i do this to collect and archive all the good times where i got to share joy with my friends – no matter whether that joy is because of the game, or in spite of it.

i'd say this title and thumbnail do a better job preserving those memories than some clickbait does.

[icycream24]

Silver and Espio for the ask meme? :>

hehehe my favs hehee🤤🤤🤤

SILVER:

I think most ppl don't know, but I used to really dislike Silver when I was first introduced to this character online. Not a game, no no, but YouTube AMV vids of this dude with cutesy shippy art of Silvaze. His portrayal was so degraded to me (I was 11 at that time?) that I believed he was a self-insert character for some popular artists to ship themselves with Blaze, in the girl-boss dynamic. Ofc, I looked for more info online and realised Silver was an actual character.

At that time I was playing Sonic Riders Zero Gravity and only unlocked Shadow/Rouge/Cream. After knowing what characters were avaliable, I tried my best to unlock the rest, including Silver. I also did not like his voice in English at that time, so much that I decided to switch the voice-overs to Japanese. And I also did not like it 😂 Not because it was grading! But more like, I was shocked by the drastic difference between the two. Kid me had to decide which portrayal I prefer more (ofc not aware of narrative difference of the scripts, I just chose based on my preference) and ended up with Japanese bc I vibe with the calm seriousness in the voice more. Eventually I did get used to both voices after more exposure of this character, watching playthrough videos online.

Talking about watching 06, I was not expecting him to be so different from my first impression of this "whiny/incapable/loser" kid. Silver actually was serious about fighting for his future, like a dedicated soldier. Blaze was *not* the girl-boss, she was on equal grounds with Silver. (Really... I was like 11/12, now that I think about it, how come ppl's comprehension skills so drastically apart that we can get totally different character interpretations?) I started to find charming traits on Silver, and that was when I started looking up for this character's info more & more.

And then I discovered the Rivals series. I watched the whole thing, 1&2, and this Espio character... Wait they're kinda nice tgt. (it was year 2012?? AAAAA I can't believe I'm still insane about Espilver/Silvespio, they're my sons now at this point 😭✨) I remember using Skype and talked about the ✨chemistry✨ between Silver & Espio, and my friend said I was tripping 😭

Anyway here's Espio:

At that time I didn't have that much knowledge on Espio, I just thought their Eng voice in Heroes sounded like he's dying in a few years with how gruff & grandpa it sounded LOL. Mostly I only draw him with Silver bc I realised no one shipped these two back then. (there was ppl but there was no tags for them) So I felt like, no, impossible. I need to COOK for them! So I started shipping them like FedEx with my limited skills 🥴

My Espio appriciation was mainly started by shipping him with Silver. As I reflect on why I enjoy this ship so much, I dug up traits that I like about Espio. He was helpful, supportive, and overall has a rather peaceful way of communicating with others (aka SILVER hhh). Compared to other characters, especially in Rivals, he was really chill and kept his head clear, and unconditionally aided Silver simply bc he knew he was helping someone with a good cause. Such admirable traits that I'd say are pretty rare even irl.

Still, Espio did not have that much screen time. His portrayal in my mind I do admit was half canon, half fanon. Silly ninja with goofy teammates that values teamwork & is capable of aiding others, plus saint-like patience & wisdom. (Haha...really, a lot of his traits are get from Rivals 2, his ways of interacting with individuals was way more informative than games & anime shows combined 🤧)

But yeah, with time I like these 2 characters even more, started to make all kinds of headcanons that I won't be able to elaborate here. The texts are already getting too long here 😂 I've imagined them, either tgt or separately, in fluff/angst/spice/AU/wholesome/dead dove/anything really bc I just enjoy these two so much 💕

It's kinda selfish to say, but with how little Espilver there was during that time, it was almost like they got a clean slate & I was not swayed by any other ppl's interpretation of these two for a few years. And ofc by time these two surely became my favorite characters. LOL I realised in my busy years of not drawing often, Silver & Espio were the only characters I drew 😂

UGGGHHHAA I love these two sm 😭✨ thanks for asking hahah I wanna talk about them all day 🤧✨

[amywhereyouwant]

Some TOH HCs I wanted to share

There are a LOT of them, so They're under the read more for your scrolling convenience

Luz

-Uses She/They pronouns

-Would watch the entirety of Sword Art Online just to be able to shit on it properly

-Eats way too much Shredded Cheese even though she’s Lactose Intolerant

-Has made a Your mom joke to Willow only to remember she doesn’t have one

-Mains King in Tekken and made a custom attire trying to make it look like the other King

-Screenpeeks religiously in Split Screen Multiplayer

-Predicted Hecazura 2 books into the series, still won’t shut up about it

-Relatively known Digital Artist, her blog probably took off when she started making art of the Demon Realm 

-Hates baking

-Helps Amity bake out of the kindness of her heart(Also seeing Amity enjoying herself is really nice)

-Had a cold once, hasn’t had a Human Realm illness since

-Has SH scars from her depressed period back in the human realm(S3E1), still ashamed over them

-Quotes Memes constantly, only Hunter understands what she’s talking about

-Cracked a rib tripping on a rug on her way to bed

Amity

-Absolutely hates Bugs, like, genuinely despises them

-Does not know how computers work, but still tries to use Luz’s laptop to look up date ideas

-Can and will dress as the most stereotypical Witch ever

-Adopted(All 3 Blight Kids are in my HC)

-Likes to bake

-Does not know how to bake

-Gets sick constantly

-Works out a lot so she can help out with rebuilding the Isles(and also a little bit for Luz)

-Used to apologise a lot for minor things(Pre-timeskip)

-REALLY Bummed she didn’t get to see Titan Luz

-Watched the barbie movie the same day Gus watched Oppenheimer

Gus

-Goes nonverbal when stressed out, uses Illusions and his palisman to communicate

-Cried for hours when he finished the last Cosmic Frontier book, even though it was a happy ending

-Likes the idea of Professional Wrestling, but wishes the fights were to the death

-Quotes Cosmic Frontier as a Vocal Stim

-Dramatically perishes in Matt’s arms on the regular

-Headcanons O'Bayley to look exactly like Hunter just for the memes

-Thinks Human 2D Animation is the most beautiful thing to have ever been created

-Watched Across the Spider-Verse and Begged for Luz to draw a Spider-Suit for him, she did one for everyone

-Got really jealous when everyone else got flapjack tattoos, then he realised he could just make one of his own with an Illusion

-Got insanely mad when he learned about Human Discrimination(“How can you hate someone for something they can’t change? That’s ridiculous!”)

-Watched Oppenheimer the same day Amity and Hunter watched the Barbie Movie

Hunter

-LOVES Dino Nuggies

-Didn’t know Dinosaurs were real for a while until Luz showed them to him, Velociraptors are his favourite because “They’re like Wolves but Lizards!” (They’re not)

-Has a tumblr account where he posts about Wolves, Luz is his only follower

-Definitely has a Fursona

-Kicks Luz’s ass at most video games, except for Halo 2 specifically(I wonder why)

-”Will you go out with me?” “Hunter we’ve been dating for a year” “Oh.”

-Thinks Huggbees’ How it’s actually made videos are 100% Legit and honest

-Made Willow a Flower Shirt to match his Wolf Shirt

-Wears Willow’s Flower Shirt he made

-Imagine Dragons is his favourite band

-Has Epilepsy

-Steals Willow’s dresses sometimes

-Found Nicole Coenen on YouTube, showed her to luz “She looks kinda like Amity!”(Nobody else sees the resemblance)

-Probably plays a LOT of Roblox

-Watched the Barbie Movie with Amity(Luz forced him to)

-Has seen every single vine there is(Thank the Titan for Vine Compilations on YouTube)

-Any kind of facial hair he grows is really patchy so he just goes clean shaven for convenience

-Snuck food during TtT even though he was 100% allowed to eat normally

-Bananas do exist in the Demon Realm, Hunter has just never learned that they do

-Gets visits from the Spirits of the other Golden Guards in his dreams

Willow

-Tackled someone to the ground when they only slightly bumped into Hunter(We stan a protective queen)

-Feeds her palisman doggie treats, nobody knows why

-Filled Camila’s entire back garden with way too many plants during TtT, they’re still there despite not being watered for a while

-Made a Garland made of both Demon and Human Realm plants for Hunter on their anniversary

-Has no real idol/role model

-Happily Listens to everyone else ramble about their interests

-Wears Hunter’s Wolf Shirt

-Calls Hunter “Hun” as a short for his name, started doing it even more after she figured out what it actually meant

-Pranks people she doesn’t like by putting giant Grape Vines around their house

-Held a presentation about plant care for the Gravesfield Gardener Society

-Thinks most Human Sports are boring(Except for Hockey and Roller Derby)

Vee

-Pulls off some crazy ass cosplays

-Knows how to drive Camila’s car perfectly, still has no idea how it actually works though

-Laughed so hard she couldn’t breathe first time she heard Metal Pipe Fall Sound Effect

-Considers Luz to be her Sister, Camila burst into tears and hugged her when she called Luz “Big Sis” in front of her for the first time

-Plays Minecraft on Camila’s home PC, has spent tons of time on Hypixel and built a little shrine for the other basilisks on a private world

-Takes after Luz in a lot of ways

-Is way better at Spanish than Luz, flexes about it constantly(Nobody really cares)

-Had no idea how to tell Masha she was a Basilisk when they confessed to her(Masha knew long before she told them)

-Is really cuddly in Basilisk form, not so much when shapeshifted(“I don’t really feel like it’s myself”)

-Her first kiss with Masha was really awkward, she apologised like 45 times and cried because it wasn’t good

-Steven Universe is a canon IP in the universe, so she got really confused when Amethyst sounded EXACTLY like her

I have no idea why I made this

[infernothechaosgod]

Should I make a video essay about epic mickey? (Rewrite)

i already made this post once but Im rewritting it becuse It looked too much like someone else's take And I have much more to say now that I thought about this post longer

So as we all know Theres alot of epic mickey video essays on youtube however alot of them Are beasicly Roasting the game as if it was made in 2023 in this weirdly sugarcoded way so you'll feel bad for liking the game but you'll also hear good stuff about it so you'll FEEL like it's good critisism but trust me its just the complement sandwitch

(complement sandwitch is when someone gives you a complement and Then critisism either deserved or not then another complement so you'll feel better...but it doesnt work too well with bad critisism lmao)

Theres alot takes about how The game doesnt look good enough and Im like...Good people, IT WERE 2010s! What do you expect? Not only computers could handle less then but also making games was VERY DIFFRENT and you never should come to a game from 2010s with expectations of good graphic, seriously never, Modeling and such were also very diffrent

Now I say I agree with some things The game could be a bit darker I think a bigger exploration of how oswald or anyone in fact feels about being forgotten Could be great, like it's horrifying and oswald Went from very beloved by audience to fully forgotten in a very short amount of time for a toon Also some concept arts Imo should make it into game and enemies could look creepier, also the morality system could be more effective like there could be a line saying "you notice oswald looks around more than usualy...prehaps he's looking if there are any witnesses around" Or something like that Like mickey litellary has a weapon capeable of erasing you from reality but also capeable of making beautiful things and fixing peoples problems i could argue it deserves more exploration

But the thing is...the game is amazing

It is, I hate most things from my childhood now becuse I went through critique era that im semi still in and I revisited things from my childhoot and most of them sucked lmao (being a writer I just cried from dissapointed sometimes) but epic mickey? It was still amazing, and 2d parts to this day look GORGEOUS The story is great and I do agree that the oryginal plot for second part should have stayed but it got replaced by a Still good idea

Also its so SO creative! It uses the fact the characters are cartoons to its fullest really theres no other game that I know of where you go into old projectors and where you can paint and erase your sorounding with accualy good explanation The mage was creative as hell its amazing

Also

The whole time you play youre suppoust to play for the plot not for the "gamer experience" Becuse it may suprise you but You dont HAVE to get all the pins and tickets, you can for fun But no one is forcing you to and whining about how long it took to 100% the game is not a good critique, you did this to yourself bro

The reviews or essays are often beasicly copypasted from eachother, I watched like 4 essays and reviews but it felt like one dude talking in 4 diffrent voices and repeating himself it's baaaaad

Epic mickey was a great game and it deserves a remake 200% and explaining how "it feel from its grace" isnt gonna be helpful

I wanna make a video about How there are things to change definitley (CURSE YOU WEIRD CAMERA) but its still a great game with some amazing plot And with great effect on younger audience at the time who played it

So help a boy out (again) and tell me do you think I should make that video essay? It may be long But I think you'll see it as a good thing haha

[thrilling-oneway]

Alright sappy post incoming...

4 years ago today my friend made me download sif because my ds died when we were playing miitopia and he wanted to play a game with me. He'd been trying to get me to download it for like two years and I finally gave in, but told him I'd delete the game after we were done. I forgot.

The next day I played it a bit just to see if I had any interest in keeping it and. Well I was absolutely captivated. It wasn't actually my first gacha or rhythm game but the card arts were really pretty and the songs really captivated me. I still remember my first beatmap (Strawberry Trapper) and my original favourite song (GENKI ZENKAI DAY! DAY! DAY!).

I...actually didn't watch the anime in full until late last year and through this year but I did watch an abridged cut of sunshine's dub not long after getting into the game (rip forever LLSunshine dub but only the good parts). I found out the plot via the wiki and watched loads of youtube videos about love live and basically had a chika discovers μ's moment with this franchise. To say it changed my life is an understatement.

Love live helped me with my depression (also likeeee it was 2020 lol) a lot which is a weird thing to say but if any of my project sekai followers are reading this all that hope and joy shit they say about mmj is true. It also helped me come to terms with my queerness because i was 14 and had a load of issues and had never really seen something like love live. i mean i came right out the she ra fandom into this LOL but it was like. woah. riko reads yuri. and she just does. mind blowing shit. also helped me realise i was transmasc somehow but that's a whole different can of worms.

love live has genuinely been a life changing franchise for me and i wouldn't be the person i am today without it. it feels weird to say that about a franchise like don't bow down the corporate overlords and that but ive seen so many people say the same thing. like whether it's just the music or the profound lessons about regrets and youth and being alive that the anime teaches you this franchise is one that leave a mark on so many people.

i wasn't gonna write something like this until next year for my 5th lovelive-versary but then aqours announced they would be doing their final live and i have. so many feelings about it it's hard to put into words. aqours changed my life. saved it maybe. but as i said already this franchise has had such an impact on my life but i have to give aqours in particular so much credit. the anime taught me so much, their music resonated with me not necessarily on a personal level all the time but i feel every word even if it's coming out of the mouths of anime characters. i can't go to beaches anymore without writing aqours in the sand, even if i look like a fucking weirdo doing it. it's the best i can do to a thank you since i'll never be able to see them irl.

i wouldn't be where i am now, running a dumbass project sekai trivia blog and treating it like a job if i didn't get into love live. i wouldn't have met people through prsk if it wasn't for love live first. so on and so forth this franchise has given me so much.

anyway that's enough sap. watch love live.

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Hello! I was wondering if you could do a match up for Hazbin Hotel and Fullmetal Alchemist?

• Pronouns: She/her mainly, but I’m ok with pretty much anything

• Sexuality: Demi-bisexual, greyromantic

• Zodiac/MBTI: Virgo, INFJ

• Appearance: Very short, under 5’0, honey skin tone that easily darkens in the sun, very dark brown hair and eyes which can be mistaken as black, mainly wear braids and ponytails, VERY LONG HAIR, square glasses, slightly chubby ig?, small hands, thick eyebrows, lots of body hair specifically on my legs (which I like), I think that’s just about it?

• Personality: I'm quite reserved and introverted, one to blend into the crowd and not one to stand out, but once you get to know me l can be very open and expressive. An introverted theater kid essentially. I'd also say I'm pretty kind, but can also be sarcastic. I can also be a bit mischievous as I like to do random stuff because I think it's funny. Despite all this I'm still a more lower energy person and am pretty calm, the mediator (and quite mature I'm told). The therapist friend who also needs a therapist if you will. But that more hyper part of me definitely comes out more intensely if something I like is involved. As in bouncing up and down at the seams explaining my interests hyper. I also seek for deep connections with people, so I hate small talk. I also get quite socially anxious but am getting better about it, and have some trust issues

• Likes: Robotics and engineering, art, hanging out with friends when I have the energy, relaxing at home by myself, swimming, hiking, watching YouTube, anime, musicals, music, collecting miniatures (like things that you’d find in a dollhouse), museums, dad jokes mainly but all sorts of humor, dark humor would probably be second, traveling

• Dislikes: jogging, conflict, hurting people I love, loud noises, a lot of foods/I am a VERY picky eater (typically it’s an aversion to anything with melted cheese like burgers or macaroni and cheese, pizza I only stopped disliking recently), SPIDERS and just bugs in general,

• Hobbies: drawing, writing, singing, reading, collecting rocks, playing video games, daydreaming (ideas for shows, books, etc), listening to music

• Any extra information: I have epilepsy (am medicated and not photosensitive) so maybe you could add that in somewhere?

Thank you for your time!

Hi! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took a while. I hope you like your matchups!

In Hazbin Hotel, I match you with...

The mediator and the therapist friend who also kind of needs a therapist you say? Yep, sounds like Vaggie would be the perfect match for you! You can help each other out since you both understand the others struggles.

Since you have trust issues, there’s definitely going to be some rough times when it’s revealed that Vaggie’s an ex-angel. But she’ll do whatever she needs to win your trust back.

Please make dad jokes around her. It’s the only time you’ve ever seen such a large crack in her usually stoic façade. I see Vaggie as someone who loves dad jokes. She just thinks they’re funny.

Will get rid of any bugs and spiders for you. Of course, when Angel Dust is getting on her nerves, she’ll use this as an excuse to try and drive him out but it hasn’t worked yet.

Vaggie’s an amazing help when it comes to your epilepsy. She’s very attentive and can usually spot triggers before they become a problem and will steer you clear of them. In the case of an incident, she’ll pull out all the stops to help you in whatever way she can.

In Fullmetal Alchemist, I match you with...

First of all, expect to have a very excited Winry talking to you about everything automail. She’s so happy she’s found someone as interested in robotics and engineering as she is!

I think she would enjoy going on hikes with you. It’s a nice break away from the workshop and she likes getting to stretch her legs while also spending time with you.

Loud noises are unavoidable in Winry’s workshop, so she’ll never ask you to visit her while she’s working. She’ll also do her best to keep the volume down when Ed and Al visit but there’s only so much she can do there...

In a modern au, she would definitely be into watching YouTube videos, especially anything DIY. Please give her recommendations though! She’s more than willing to watch anything you like.

With the amount Ed breaks his automail, Winry has to travel a lot. Since you like travelling, she would love it if you accompanied her. There some extra safety travelling with someone, and she gets to explore new places with you.

[nitro-nova]

Birthday devblog

I'll post a small oops large gamedev update on Combat Nightsuit Saboteur. My last post about it was in April.

During that month, I started working on concept art for the character and sprite.

Starting to get into May, I was working on art for interior areas like you're seeing above, and was starting to develop an idea for the art direction overall. Developing art assets like these while maintaining a full-time job is pretty difficult (every game's a miracle blah blah blah), so I had to accept that my pace would be slow.

I was doing some basic level designs here and testing them out with Clem while taking notes on feedback. I was researching platformers as I was doing this, so it took a little time.

In July, I wanted to find ways to mitigate how long it took to develop art assets. I started working on a prototyping art style so that I could have something in place. I also made a tool for calculating pixel art columns and gutter widths.

I also started taking notes on what lightness values of the character to avoid using in my assets, so that she doesn't blend in too easily. I took a break afterward to visit family with Clem.

I resumed work in August and started sketching out ideas for individual rooms.

I use GIMP for pixel art, but one of the unfortunate gripes I have is that its color palette mapping produces inconsistent artifacts. To combat this, I employed Dither Machine for more consistent pixel gradients.

By September though, I was getting frustrated with my pace, and a burning thing in the back of my mind was that even though the scope was small, the game wasn't fun or interesting, and I wasn't even making progress in the one level I was planning.

I mean, up until this point, I was trying to be kind to myself. I had a full-time job and was sleeping 6-7 hours a night so I could use the time after 10 hour shifts to draw pixel art and watch videos. I was making time for friends and going out with them.

Maybe I have an attention disorder? I do watch more YouTube than I really should (generally I try to use it for listening to music while I create, but I admit I sometimes get sidetracked by bops too lol). I imagine getting suboptimal sleep every day and having to catch up on weekends doesn't help.

I decided in September to change the project. An increase in scope, because I needed to make something I was more familiar with. Six characters, but you only play as one. No longer a jump-and-shoot, but a Strider-like, with an added focus on a beat-em-up combat system. I spent a few days writing backstories and getting the setting more in order, which would help me develop assets with more direction to it.

I refined my character sprite some more, started working on animations.

This shift in design was giving me a second wind, and I knew that I needed a more-than-basic platforming system. I was also promoted at my job, which came with a schedule change (I also got married lol, October was a big month). I decided to adjust my sleep schedule to 8-9 hours a night, and dedicate a single hour per work day for chores. As of today I am much healthier.

October was a major programming month. I started development on what I do best -- a Strider-like platforming engine.

Running, jumping, walljumping, corner grabbing, and ceiling grabbing were implemented. By the end of October, I was finished and successfully deployed the code into the project. To celebrate, I played around with anime color palettes and tried out my art style with a Blender project.

God it looks badass, I don't regret spending time on that art, after all. Despite how much I suffer, productivity-wise, it's stuff like this that motivates me to push on and create. It sounds a bit silly, but this image saved this project from death, because I can't let go of how much I dream of making games and animations.

If I really do finish this project, I can only imagine how much the world would like it. I just know I'm cooking, here. I've been thinking about inviting friends to help (the promotion came with an income increase, but it mainly helps me afford things more comfortably, sadly). I know for sure I need a project manager who may be able to secure full-time development funding, a Kanamori of sorts, to help develop a schedule and try to stick to it. Artists and quality checkers would be amazing, too.

November's development is smaller, but that's because it focused a ton on figuring out a pixel art animation process.

A/B Pose Sketches: Sketching multiple before after poses, like the ones my friend Rawri drew.

Selection, mainly determining which A and B sketches look best.

Joint-Keyframing: Those are the head and joint versions you see me make, with the pink helmet.

In-Betweens: Planning how the motion is meant to carry out.

Limb Shaping: Adding the limb silhouettes

Detailing: Adding the blues, golds, silvers, and black parts. Includes a check for any details I missed.

And that's where I'm currently at!

Edit: Actually, no, I need to say that people HAVE been helping me, here's who I'm shouting out:

Clementine - My wife! Thank you for loving me and supporting me and buying groceries and cooking meals for me and working hard. Genuinely I could never make progress without you helping me.

Mechanicalrot - Our partner! You also help give advice on projects and cook sometimes. I love you as well!

Robin and Eli - My family. Thank you for also buying groceries and helping me with dishes/trash and for your support. (strange-alchemy gets a shoutout for being supportive as well <3)

Saphica - Additional moral support and partner in crime. Thank you for reviewing my artwork and helping me stay positive even when I was feeling rough.

Rawrienstein and AndromedaZach - Amazing friends lending their art experience to help improve my art and animations. It means a lot that you hope for my success.

Rose - Another wonderful friend, thank you for having us over and cooking and showing me movies.

Jaycee - Wonderful friend, thanks for liking my posts and supporting me, too. :]

[ask-codeearasure]

Ouija and Sarco's Master-Post for Character Design.

Struggling with character designs is a bitch, so here is a master post full of resources for you to help you bring your character designs to the next level, I shall also have some text that will elaborate on why I linked the video (and sometimes the channel) for you to understand why.

These are inspirations for Sarco and I and I wanted an excuse to share them. Okay, I wanted a huge excuse to share them.

1.) TB Skyen (Tumblr account @ohnoitstbskyen ) and his video "What's the Deal with Kindred?"

Why TB Skyen and this video in particular?

TB Skyen is a wonderful YouTuber and Artist who can look into the art of League of Legends and pick it apart and critique it in the context of being from a multi-billion dollar company, but also in the context of the story that the character is from.

His critiques can go from color scheme, body type, pose, and even animations that show you just how detailed those animations can go (watching his animation breakdowns is wonderful and hilarious at how geeky he is! If you want an excuse to have a dumb as hell smile on your face, watch his animation breakdowns and how much fun he has going in depth on it. Trust me!).

This video is my personal favorite because he goes into detail about the character's voice lines and how Lamb and Wolf talk as though they are in a play. Going very heavily into the writing of the characters because character writing is extremely important in the very design of the characters.

Every video he has on character designs shows how far you CAN push your character designs.

HOWEVER, you SHOULD NOT hold yourself to the standards of billion-dollar companies. I need to remind you, that he is actively critiquing a multi-billion dollar company and is pushing people to have higher standards for these companies.

DO NOT destroy yourself for not being able to push yourself to such standards. You should push yourself, but don't push yourself too hard. Remember, as an artist we all start somewhere, and stepping out of your comfort zones is wonderful, but you cannot do it all the time to the point of burnout.

TB Skyen doesn't even hold himself to that standard fully with his Building a Better series.

Art should also be enjoyable for the artist.

2.) Subjectively and their video "Redesigning League of Legends' Boring Champs: Zyra"

Subjectively actively have been making videos about Pokemon and League of Legends along with their ever-famous Apoctober concepts and stories.

If it's not obvious, I'm a League of Legends fan girl, and it's true. Sue me.

Subjectively, like TB Skyen, have been redesigning League of Legends champions, and critique Riot Games' shitty design philosophy when it comes to Female Champions.

With this video, you will find how sometimes character designs can go in many different directions and how you don't need to restrict yourself when it comes to being "human-like".

Yes, sex sells, but I'm honestly tired of every single female character having the same face and same body type and every female character having to be put in the "conventionally attractive seductress" box.

We should also have monster women who look monstrous. We should also have women who are buff, muscular, and terrifying.

Speaking of sex selling...

3.) NickyBoi and his video "Riot Refuses to Rework Cassiopeia... So I did it for Them."

It is no surprise that when it comes to women in the videogame industry as a whole and even in comics and movies, women are not allowed to be anything but conventionally attractive without having a reason for it. We often hear the “But why can’t women be powerful aaaaand conventionally attractive?” argument that isn’t really an argument. Being attractive should not be the ONLY part of our power fantasy.

Men can be anything from hideous monsters who can bite the head off of a motherfucker, to someone who is built like a Greek god with biceps on top of biceps with biceps as a cherry on top with 12 pack abs that you could cut a steak on.

If men can have a diverse set of power fantasies to choose from, then women should get just as much diversity with that.

Which is why I bring you to this video.

Sexuality and seduction are just as much of a power fantasy but it needs to have a purpose. So when it comes to the redesigning of this character Nickyboi had to legitimately overhaul a small chunk of her story: the fact that she was supposed to be terrifying to her fellow Noxians.

She was supposed to be considered “scary” and unworthy of civilization. But Nickyboi was not satisfied with his monstrous design for her, so he wondered that if being a seductress is supposed to be a part of her past and is supposed to get her magic from the ascended, then perhaps, he could combine both sides of the story and make her a villain that won, thus leaning into full-on fanservice.

 When designing your characters, you must take their past into consideration, and this is why Cassiopea was such a terrible design at first. Simply overhauling her story and actually taking into account the region she was born into and the one she stays in allows her new design to actually fit her as a character and keeps everything intact.

But when coming from scratch it can be hard but simply looking around and starting with the story can allow you to keep a level head and ensure that you are able to work within your means. But that means we have one last thing to address…

Character Writing:

When it comes to writing characters there are some people who want to say that there is no wrong way to write a character, but there is a VAST majority of people who will grab you by the shoulders and tell you, that there is a correct way to write a character and will give you a long list to go through to get you started.

However, I will tell you the truth: It depends on what you’re writing.

When I start creating a character I sometimes have to take a step back and prevent myself from jumping into a pit.

I am sure that you’ve noticed within mine and Sarco’s writing, especially when it comes to the Ocs, they are devastatingly dark.

But I’m going to level with you here. The majority of those characters are mine. Edelweiss, Sketch, Klezmer, Katagma, Izanagi, Occultatum, Cyberberry – they’re all mine. But we’re going to focus on one here in this exampleI am going to give you, and that’s Sketch.

Before I made Sketch, I had another character that was basically made during my childhood, and was a silent wish of mine. I didn’t want to have emotions anymore.

And there are times when I still wish that, and that is one of the reasons why Sketch is like that. He is that power fantasy. Unlike Ink, he has the ability to be completely emotionless and function as such. But when it comes to exploring that fantasy, it has its downfalls. And it is fascinating because as an adult I realized that that wish is not a wish – it is a curse. That isn’t to say that people with ASPD, or even just low-empathy are sick, or broken, or anything of the sort.

They have struggles. Real actual struggles. So when it comes to exploring such a concept is finding those struggles and figuring out how to humanize them. I had to take a step back and ask myself, “How would this be interpreted logically, with little to no emotion in it?” and I had to sit there for a fucking hour trying to answer that.

It was only after that Sarco informed me that little to no empathy is not indicative of little to no emotional basis whatsoever, so I had to start back at square one. Sketch having absolutely no emotion would not mean he has ASPD. With a complete lack of emotion, that is something else entirely. Plus, assuming those with little to no empathy have no emotional experiences at all is ableist, so I’m learning better from that. The psychology field is fucked, let me tell you that much. Each and every single mental illness can overlap with each other or trigger one another like a fucked up domino effect. But when writing Sketch, I learn more about him oddly enough, and even then I learn how he could be healed as a person while still staying the same person, not being rebooted, not just flipping a switch and making him “good” again, or “resolved”.

One of the things that truly inspired me when it comes to writing characters with mental illnesses, with “points” that don’t exactly make them good people, but people who believed that they are doing good, is Arcane.

If you haven’t watched Arcane, I highly suggest you do it. Get a Netflix subscription or find a way to pirate it. It is something that will make you think. And that is what I like to do when it comes to writing.

I want to make my readers think, even if they don’t realize that they’re thinking about it.

I have one question that I have to ask when I write Sketch, every single day I write him, even when I’m not writing him but rather coming up with future arcs that will involve him:

“How will this affect him in the future?”

And it breaks me.

It makes me sit back and realize that I’m the cruelest creature alive, and I grin like a maniacal villain who has caught the idiotic hero in a trap that was years in the making that they have no chance of escaping.

This question is there because every story beat that is supposed to be truly hard-hitting and even traumatic towards the characters is supposed to be addressed, it is supposed to be something that affects them. There is a reason that the Negativity Venom that is running through Dream’s veins in the story that Sarco and I are writing is stated to have a permanent effect on him. There is a reason that it is described as something that swings a door open and it can never be shut because that is what trauma is.

Trauma, mental illnesses, character arcs, what have you – they are things that cannot (should not) be undone.

Unlike Pandora’s Box, there is no way to put all the problems back. There is no shutting it. There is only finding a way to adapt.

When writing, you are adding a piece of yourself. You are opening yourself up and really introspecting, even if you don’t realize it. You are ripping a small chunk out of you and putting it to words. It’s one of the reasons why writing is so emotionally draining sometimes. But that is what makes good stories. They can be so incredibly human.

Or if not human, settle for alive, meaningful nonetheless. Make the characters living forces, something with a motive and a struggle. The characters don't even have to literally be alive, it’s just gotta be something that moves the reader. A lot of elements in storytelling are so impactful because some part of them was inspired by reality.

Character writing has just as much importance as visual design, because writing is just design in a different form, and there is no shame in reshaping it time and time again until the concept fits what you’re going for.

But most of all, you have to put in effort, thought, and research. I went on a rant once about how much I hate it when people do not put in effort into their designs or writing because it becomes so incredibly evident so easily. But when you put in effort. When you try your best, it becomes so incredibly obvious to all of those who have an invested interest.

Just do your best and have fun while doing it. While there are some very important concerns with writing the heavy and complicated stuff, there is no right way to write your character. To start, you are supposed to experiment. Don’t let “perfection” be the enemy of good enough.

[cyberkevvideo]

The Dragon Ball Z TTRPG -- Yes, an Official One Does Exist

Before I go into the game itself, I want to talk about the creator of the franchise.

Yesterday, the world learned of the loss of the great Akira Toriyama. He was so incredibly influential to so many of us, and like many others, I was absolutely gutted by the tragic news. He was far too young.

Dragon Ball was a big part of my life growing up, and it's what helped me create bonds with so many people who became good friends. Other people online have written poetically about how much each of his series and creations have touched their hearts, and I don't know that I can do the same justice. I'm not wordy like that.

I grew up during the start of the NES era so I knew about Dragon Quest, but at the time I had no idea that the iconic character and monster designs were thanks to him. When the SNES came out and Chrono Trigger was released, I immediately recognized the style of art. Dragon Quest VIII is still my favourite, if only because it's cool to see the characters go pseudo-super saiyan. In 1995, the original dub of Dragon Ball hit airways here, and a few months later Dragon Ball Z was released. It was surreal to watch kid Goku and adult Goku every week, simultaneously. Seeing the flying nimbus, but not seeing the Power Pole, and not knowing who Piccolo or Krillin were, but recognizing Master Roshi and Bulma, and finding out Goku was an alien the whole time. It was jarring at times, but seeing references to each series like the Kamehameha Wave and capsules, helped. Then there were all the Budokai games for PS2. I practically broke my dual-shock controllers trying to win those beam battles.

This is going to get long, so I'll put a separation bar here.

When the internet finally came out publicly and schools had access, I looked up Sailor Moon, Dragon Ball, discovered what anime was, learned of Akira Toriyama and how he had a comedy series called Dr. Slump, that the Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z anime were considered separate stories, but the manga kept it as Dragon Ball, etc.

Heck, when the cards came out, I was one of the first people to buy Ani-Mayhem's DBZ set.

What's really great to see is people discovering the Dragon Ball manga for the first time, hearing their thoughts on YouTube videos (namely Merphy and TotallyNotMark), and how original and groundbreaking the fight choreography is compared to others series, and how much his style has influenced current day shounen manga. And that doesn't even include how Team Four Star and DBZA has influenced people.

But, let's get into the rest of this post.

When the TTRPG came out in 1999, DBZ was such a phenomenon that our local bookstore was having trouble keeping it in stock. My gaming group ended up having to pre-pay for a copy of the TTPRG. DBZ: The Anime Adventure Game from R. Talsorian Games was a little rough around the edges when it came to balance, and how powering up worked compared to the series, especially when that system was revised in the Frieza saga book. Still, it was nothing any of us had experienced before. Up until that point, we had done AD&D, Rifts, Toon, Shadowrun, and Marvel Super Heroes.

The person who usually ran the games, ended up being the GM and we did two campaigns. I had an absolute blast. Unfortunately, I was kind of alone in that. The TTRPG doesn't leave a lot for social interaction, which a number of our players preferred doing. This is closer to a war game. As such, we never played the game system again after the two campaigns. In fact, we never even finished the second one. I still picked up all three books as they came out though, and the GM from that group still has his original Saiyan Saga book.

The first thing that made me happy, as I didn't have nearly the dice collection I do now, was all you needed were 6-sided dice. That made my life so much easier, and for the Shadowrun players, they had tubs of d6 ready to use.

When it came to the contents of the book, what I really enjoyed was seeing all the power levels, and the character art.

These power levels updated with each book, and the lore and special abilities would also update.

If you kept the game to Dragon Ball levels, you felt that you could keep the campaign going for a very long time. The character sheet was extremely simple, and there were tips on what you could build a campaign around, as well as basic suggestions on trying to keep the "main character" complex to a minimum. The Star Wars RPG systems have a similar concept where the GM is told that either everyone's a Jedi, or no one's a Jedi. Same thing for ewoks since they were so limited for weapon proficiencies (they literally could never learn how to use tech, ever, which I find ridiculous). Basically, for Dragon Ball, namekians should look at fushions to power up, or everyone should be a saiyan or half-saiyan, especially if you're bringing in the super saiyan transformation. Otherwise, no saiyans in the game at all. This way everyone stays about the same level and can't be a spotlight hog while everyone else is forced to sit back and watch the game instead of participate.

If you'd like to read a full review of it, you can check one out here. Barnabas did a great write-up.

Personally, I find it kind of wild that there's literally zero stats for dinosaurs or other prehistoric animals. Where's the T-Rex and sabertooth tiger? This feels like a massive oversight given that people live alongside dinosaurs and other extinct-in-our-world beasts.

Overall, it was original in what it tried to accomplish, and I appreciate that. We've since seen other game systems that can replicate this fairly well. I prefer BESM (Big Eyes, Small Mouth), and any edition works, but I know others really enjoy doing DBZ using FATE, which I can see working. I've seen people try to pull off DBZ characters using 3.5e, Pathfinder 1e and 2e, and 5e, but you'd need to homebrew your own class from the ground up, and it likely wouldn't be balanced. At best, you could maybe get something close with a 20th level character.

If you find a copy somewhere, I definitely recommend it for a one-shot, if nothing else. Maybe you can run it at a convention. I'm considering doing that. It'd be a nice send off. And this year's convention is dinosaur themed, so maybe I'll have the mission be to teach a dinosaur how to ride a ball.

In closing, I'm so grateful to Akira Toriyama for giving us the stories and designs that he did. I can not convey in words just how important the Dragon Ball franchise was for my friends and I to even have met one another, and then Chrono Trigger brought us even closer and we'd go to one friend's house every lunch (he lived across the street from school) and we'd watch him play because we were so immersed in the story and with the characters...

So much respect and admiration for him. Akira Toriyama, thank you for everything. In Eiichiro Oda (One Piece mangaka)'s words: "I wish that heaven is as jolly of a world as the one you imagined and drew."

[marvellovelacevt]

now announcing...

my first ever subathon!!!

join me next week on September 12th @ 12PM pacific time as i have a bunch of fun activities and games lined up!

plus, look at all these fun, cool incentives...

1 Sub - I draw a new emote: Exactly what it says on the tin! I will stop what I'm doing and draw a new emote, perhaps even with input from you guys on what it could be!

5 Subs - Subscribers-only Anime Watch Party: I host a watch party in my Discord server for my subscribers! A poll with a selection of anime to watch will go up in the Discord if we reach this incentive.

10 Subs - Phasmophobia with friends: I love horror games. However, Phasmophobia reduces me into a sniveling little mess, so I'll bring on some friends to come and help me hunt these ghosts!

20 Subs - Poorly Explained Hyperfixation Video Essay: I will poorly explain one of my hyperfixations in the form of a video essay to put on my YouTube channel. Which hyperfixation? You'll just have to wait and see!

40 Subs - Endurance Karaoke: I'll do a karaoke stream where I sing until my voice gives out or I make too much of a fool of myself. Whichever happens first!

50 Subs - Identity V with viewers: I've noticed a trend of viewers in my chat coming in during my Identity V streams asking to play with me. So why not make it an incentive? If we reach this goal, I'll host a rotating open collab with my viewers during an Identity V stream so they can come and play with me! just don't hate me if i do badly, okay?

60 Subs - Phasmophobia Solo: I play Phasmophobia..... alone. Expect me to be a massive coward!

80 Subs - "Getting Over It" Endurance Stream: Some of you might remember back before my redesign when I played Getting Over It and never finished it... Let's change that. I won't stop playing until I beat Getting Over It if we reach this goal!

100 Subs - Phasmophobia Solo with Inverted Controls: Huh? Seriously? This is getting kind of silly, isn't it? If we reach this goal, I'll play Phasmophobia all by myself... With inverted controls.

150 Subs - Live2D Halfbody Model Giveaway: If we reach this lofty goal, I'll draw a ready-to-rig Live2D Halfbody Model for someone! Note: This only includes the art. I will not be rigging it for you as I cannot rig models to save my life.