#and people sort of took it the wrong way
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cannot get over lately the realization that while repcomm is widely criticized for being 'anti-jedi', it's WAY kinder and more understanding to all of its force-using characters and the jedi order as an organization than actual anti-jedi fans are
#verp talks#and at this point im just over in the corner eating popcorn#dont worry im sure i'll feel like getting into essay-length fights about this 20 year old book series again soon#its just really funny to see posts going around that are WAAAYYY more critical of jedi than repcomm has EVER been#karen traviss just has this miraculous talent for making absolutely everybody mad while imo being quite reasonable#like everything about jedi in repcomm is NECESSARY if youre going to actually address the ethical issues with the clone army#which is the sort of book that she writes and was hired to write#she really did pull a lot of punches actually#all of repcomm's 'criticism' of the jedi order seems to me like it was unavoidable if you're doing a military realism take on the clone war#it was really quite sympathetic towards the political nuances of the situation and how individual jedi also feel trapped and#how hard it really is to be the first person to stand up and say No We Can't Do This#meanwhile you have some fans just flat out saying that every jedi is a slave owner no nuance do not pass go do not collect $200#how hard it is to be an individual trying to stand up to a system that you know is wrong is a huge theme of repcomm#even kal looks back and is like 'why the hell didnt we all just say no on kamino. we could have all refused.'#'we could have taken all of tipoca city by force if we organized'#and thats the point with the jedi order too#in theory they all could have refused. but it just isnt that easy. it doesn't work that way. organizing individuals against a system is har#and thats not even accounting for the super evil incarnate BBEG who is actively and directly manipulating both sides#so like a major point of repcomm and specifically of bardan's character#is that you cannot wait for everyone else to organize around you#you individually have to say no to things that you know are wrong and YES that is virtually impossible to do but you have to TRY#bardan was INCREDIBLY lucky and fortunate to be in a position that ALLOWED him to walk out and it took him over 2 years to reach that point#anyways im begging people to read repcomm and forget about everything theyve ever heard the fandom say about it#just come at it with an open mind#buckets and buckets and buckets of nuance in this bad boy if you're ready for it#and if you can put aside the Moral Polarization Tumblr Brainrot for a bit#you just have to take the series as it is and not try and sort everything into Bad or Good as you read it
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I know that the whole reason I kept my old laptop was for situations like this, but it still feels wrong.
#doodling this while I wait for it to come out of stasis#starslog#my art#my poor laptop 💔#i took it to a couple different people and the general consensus was ''that's weird. i've never seen that happen before''#which is. Something#it's funny in a painful sort of way#this is not a field i wish to be a pioneer in#thankfully it doesn't seem like there's anything wrong with the hard drive#so there's that going for me at least
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I don't think Jesse's parents were OBVIOUSLY abusive. They didn't beat him or starve him. But idk, SOMETHING fucked up happened to him along the way because otherwise he wouldn't be the way he is. All of his behavior points to it. He's sensitive, manipulative, gravitates towards older men, has a pattern of self destructive and impulsive behavior, and isn't treated with any respect by his criminal peers until Walt shows up. The implication is that he ran towards criminality to escape something worse. What was it?
#jesse pinkman#they're not evil people#but I can easily see them minimizing/ignoring something DEEPLY wrong#or being complicit in something like that#it's the kind of abuse that was so subtle Jesse wouldn't be able to identify it#but bad enough that his aunt took him in without question#there is NO REASON#he should be the way he is#barring some sort of significant trauma#that was never addressed
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one of the reasons i enjoy keiji zero so much is that it dares to ask the question of "what if your traumagenic alter had autism"
#keiji zero#tokiya rekihiko#text#i don't think that's what the showrunners were going for though#one of the main themes of the series is to start from zero#as emphasised in the last case of the tv series by the password to the book of law + tokiya specifically being the one to figure it out#so i imagine what they were actually going for is a more childlike character who hasn't re-learned all of his adult inhibitions yet#(saso very aptly calls him ''ossan kodomo'' in one scene and. yea.)#but nouveau tokiya is so ridiculously sensory#always (physically) poking and prodding things in people's houses#and forgetting to use his inside voice when he finds a book he read as a child#his whole life after his accident is hiding (masking) the fact he lost his memory of the last twenty years#and his ability to memorise data is incredible#he glanced at a map for a few seconds and was able to memorise the route perfectly & he even had to correct saso when she went the wrong way#all of this is to say#i think he's intentionally an autism allegory in the same way as jotaro from JJBA but damn if they don't both hit me in those feels#(inb4 the point of the previous tag is to say that jotaro was not an intentionally autistic-coded character)#i'm a little bit sad the specials aren't subtitled because the first one especially is my favourite thing out of the whole series#brilliant showcase of the main characters all around And confirms tokiya's memory loss is basically DID#i can't say how good it is as representation because while i have several friends with DID i don't like to ask invasive questions about it#nonetheless though i find it interesting because he's only able to “swap” by falling into water while under extreme emotional distress#though i think after the first special they realised it sort of undermines the point the tv series left off on#(that it's ok to make a fresh start)#because while tokiya Did try to bring back heisei tokiya a few times during the second special he never succeeded#first special does reinforce the child thing though because vintage tokiya looks at a picture one of his colleagues took on his phone#and comments that he had no idea there was this three-year-old child inside him#(differentiating palaeo and neo tokiya with the names saso uses for him in whatever episode each event takes place in Lmao)
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i take pride in the country i was born and raised in because the culture is rich and the people are kind but although ive never loved it as a country country it gets harder and harder each year to even tolerate it
#i read about orbar and the demos that my parents had to be involved in to take it down#and i think about how it hasnt been very long at all since it happened that people just two generations ago were the ones who finally took-#-down the regime#but most importantly#ever since i was a child whenever theyd tell me stories about it#i would think about what would happen if i was in their position#if i was in a situation where i know for a fact what the govt is doing is wrong and i have the power to oppose it#would i take that chance?#would i go?#would they even let me?#would i let that stop me?#now that its happening to me well#i dont really know how to feel about that#people got killed in all sorts of horrendous ways when it happened in their day and age#i know change is near impossible without violence but#man. i dunno#it just feels kind of bizarre living through something like this#rant#nautical textposts#i dont feel right includin the indo tag here lol#kawal keputusan mk
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psst for my stream regulars
How does the idea of me starting streams at like 1:30PM (EST) sound. i’ll still plan to run them to like 5:00PM (EST) but now its more definite it’ll actually end then opposed to accidentally going on until like. 7:30PM (EST)
Also im on mobile so i cant make a poll so you gotta let me know through like a comment or somethin ok ty
#snap chats#maybe end even sooner at like 4:50 idk point is how does this sound...#ik everyone shows up for the 3:30 time but im also wondering if 1 is just really too early for some people#maaaaybe 2 if not ???#reason for the time switch is that my moms starting to like. actually use our gym equipment now#and all of thats in the basement. Where I Hang Out#and she’s been getting home just a bit earlier nowadays so im tryig to play it safe#i dont want this arrangement to be permanent and if things go my way for once it shouldnt be#but just for now..#if its not alright then i’ll prob have to pause on streaming for a bit#not forever just. A Bit until i get some personal things sorted#‘personal things’ Wow So Im Not Oversharing For Once leave me ALONE its a complicated situation so we’re going with Personal Things#ok im gonna enjoy my walk. or try to#my therapist is making me take my blood pressure daily and yesterday it was like#149/107 or something and i was like ‘yeah i might as well have high blood pressure’#luckily. or unluckily to me i just took my blood pressure wrong#‘snap how the fuck do you manage that’ I Am Very Stupid. I Am An Idiot Even anyway i didnt know i had to sit POINT IS#took it today and it was actually a Normal reading but man it Would Not be unbelievable if i had HBP#when my dad was with my mom he had HBP all the time and as soon as he got out he was at a normal level... lol...#ok enough rambling bye#im lying I Had That bout myself cause theres a stereotype with filipinos#where bitches just Cannot Say Goodbye like fam will say ‘bye’ and talk another ten minutes and i keep proving it true ENOUGH#BYE FR THIS TIME PLEASE LET ME KNOW HOW WE FEEL BOUT THIS TIME SHIFT
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isaiah hehe

PLEASE TELL ME YOURE TALKING ABOUT THOMAS
#THOMAS?? THOMAS!!!!!!#i LOOOOOVE isiah but not in a like cutesy heehee my tiny angel 🥰🥰 who did no wrong bcs mj is BIG MEANIE 😠😠!! way#i think he is a calculating little cretin who tries rlly hard to seem the angel to save face but in reality#is very much. not mr angel face#like he started off as a hero for chicago and detroit and then mj came and took everything away from him#including magic LOL#so now hes kind of like the unfortunate never meant to be hero villain who sort of embraces it until it goes too far#and rlly honestly misses being lauded in a heroic light so hes desperate to do anything thatll turn the tables but hes already dug his grave#with his actions and the season has already been cancelled early so a redemption arc is practically impossible but he cant understand that#bcs hes part of the show and not the one behind it despite all his thinking b4 as the hidden little puppet master#IDK i just LOOVEE all the sick kinda irony surrounding him like i looove ironic fates for ironic people it's just soo Interesting to me#i wouldnt call him Pathetic or helpless.. bcs thats what he wants u to think so he can keep in the secret advantage#BUT... hes rlly not as put together as he pretends to be. so u have this weird balance thats also a Liiittle off kilter#if u shift ur glance a certain way..#idk LOL it's like watching a coiled spring like. is it all gonna set off. or not. hes just. ugh. so fascinating to me#i looove writing him but also no one cares abt old ppl so i have to keep my delusions to myself 😭#BUT I LOVE EXPANDING ON THEM SO THANK U FOR THE CHANCE#ted tumbunity things#zeke the freak#he is a scrungy but elegant goblin. best i can describe him is that evil little girl from cats dont dance LMFAO#and bill is the big butler that he punches and breaks his hand on
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Pope Francis removed him for being ridiculously and virulently hateful toward the LGBT and other minority communities, going so far as to say they don't belong in the Church--the Church Pope Francis is currently endeavoring to make safer and more welcoming to these folks.
The misleading part has nothing to do with whether or not it's legal by secular standards. The misleading part is the implication that this was some sort of arbitrary and unreasonable move instead of a rogue bishop who preached hate facing consequences for his actions.
The man was a menace, and this level of disciplinary action is the least he deserves.
im fucking sobbing why did they kill him twice in a row in the community notes
#papa francesco is doing more active good than any pope in recent memory#possibly all history#he's made some mistakes#and there's a lot still wrong with the RCC#but this is not one of those things#i am openly gay and still culturally catholic#papa francesco is literally the only thing in the RCC i still claim#im sure this is/was meant as funny#but im begging yall to look into who your memeing uplifts#also texan here#and that sort of#full shade but southern baptist in priest's clothing#should be and needs to be removed#they are a HUGE problem in red states#they act like papa francesco is some alien who landed and took over#when even under pope john paul ii#the catechism recognized that queerness is not a choice#and that queerfolk are 100% good to stay in the church#we just have unrealistic expectations pushed on us#centering around a level of prescribed asceticism so extreme that it basically undermines holy orders#either that's a special and sacred choice only a few people have it in them to make#or it's no big deal and a quarter of tje earth's population can do it standing on our heads#i researched the catechism OBSESSIVELY when i was going through confirmation#because i wasn't fixing to do it if i wasn't actually permitted#but not everybody sits down and pores over that doorstop of a book with a fine toothed comb#and when priests like this tyler fuckstick get up there and push an agenda of hate so virulent it's literally heresy#a lot of their congregations assume they know what they're talking about#and go along with it#it rips families and communites apart for no fucking reason#but why let a little googling get in the way of a good pope joke
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i'm certified autistic now 🎉
#i have had soo many psychological testing things in the last decade#and filling out these questionnaires is always ok like it doesn't feel bad - unless it is some sort of performance testing thing#like that always feels like “but what if i get a bad grade in psych exam” but like the “bad grade” would be “probably correct diagnosis”#but my brain doesn't really get that. it still feels like bad performance at the “What Emotions Do These Eyes Emote” test means bad grade#btw that eye test. neurotypicals are supposed to do that in 2-3 minutes?? I took over 8 and got a bunch wrong. but i cannot cannot CANNOT#believe that the majority of not-autistic people would “pass” that one. like i just cannot understand.#but then getting the results back and reading like “YUP [name] is bad at [symptoms] and has [disorder]” always feels like. ok i kinda knew#but also. rude of you to say it like that wtf :(#(not that the psychologist is anything but professional in her letter of course but like it still FEELS bad in a way)#anyways it is emotionally confused socially insecure AuDHD hours here in this house and I have an official letter saying so#and i also learned that “Alexithymia” is a thing that exists and i have that but i am pretty sure not many people know that word#i should use that as an excuse now#“sorry I'm late i have Alexithymia :(”
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On of the less intuitive things about love, I've found, of any kind, is the importance of needing things.
I didn't realize it until recently, but I've always seen love as something requiring sacrifice, selflessness, patience, and generosity- to ask for nothing is to be the best person I can be, small and quiet and never in the way, always happy and helpful, self-sufficient and present when desired.
It's only as an adult, now, that I'm beginning to see the selfishness of wanting nothing.
I cut my friend's hair in my kitchen the other day. They wanted a trim and I had the skills, so I offered, and was genuinely excited when they stopped hesitating over "bothering me" and took me up on it. It was a peaceful afternoon, and we had tea and chatted for an hour or more.
My brother and I shared popcorn at the movies a while ago. When I came time to pay, I pulled my card out like a wild western sheriff and slapped it on the machine before he could fight me for it first. The satisfaction was delightful.
Someone called me crying on the phone the other day. Kept apologizing for disturbing me at work, talking about how they were bothering me on my lunch break. I was telling the truth when I told them that really, I was flattered and honored and relieved, knowing that if they were hurting I would know, that I didn't have to worry in silence. It felt good to hear them slowly come down, and to know that they knew it would be better soon, and to hear them laugh wetly on the other end. We're getting together for a visit next week.
It's hard to need things, if you've trained yourself not to. It's hard to want things, when you don't know how to want anymore. Trusting people is difficult, and so is relying on them, but I don't know where I'd be without the people who rely on me.
I've heard a lot of people say, "Nobody will love you unless you love yourself". I've had a lot of thoughts about it. It's not right, but it's not wrong, either, I think.
"Nobody will love you unless you love yourself"... I've always taken that to mean, "You will not be lovable until you develop a positive view of yourself as a person".
Now, I think it's sort of inside-out.
"Nobody will love you unless you love yourself"... because nobody can show their love to you in a way that you can accept until you treat yourself kindly, and learn what you need, and what you want, and how to ask for it, and then give that vulnerability away.
Love, for me, is someone I ask for a ride to the airport. Whether they end up doing this or not is irrelevant.
It's not needy, or selfish, or taking up energy. It's giving the gift of being wanted, and needed, and thought of. It's giving someone the security of being part of someone's life.
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she was dead silent on the drive home, but that was okay. sometimes, after band practice, she was just out of words. it was a short drive to her house. the only part where it actually felt weird was after i pulled up her parent’s driveway.
after that, the silence stretched so far it smeared and left a weird residue. she kept looking at the car door like she wanted to leave, so i looked at the door too, then she looked at me, and i looked at her, and my first thought was that she was going to tell me that the door was stuck. i was used to that car always doing some damn thing. it was the car me and all my siblings had learned to drive in, and it was really beat to hell. there were dents all over the body, which we’d unsuccessfully tried fixing up with spackle. it had looked nice for maybe a week, but then the sun wrecked it - the spackle cracked up like the mud on the bottom of a dry riverbed and turned a sort of off yellow-white that made the car looked like it had been molded out of chicken shit. it also had a bullet hole it through the cabin that whistled like a toothless old man whenever the car went above 40, so loud it could drown out the radio, and a cabin that smelled so strongly of bugspray that even the arizona summer we drove everywhere we could with the windows down.
(if you have kids one day, you will maybe, possibly, begin to understand how much i loved that car.)
anyway, i was thinking about what else could possibly be wrong with the chickenshitmobile, and she just kept looking at me, and then i wondered if there was something on my face, and she just kept looking at me, and then the penny dropped and i realized she was trying to work up the nerve to break up with me.
now, i’d seen her work up the nerve to do things like this before – it could take quite a while. and knowing it was about to happen made the waiting immediately unbearable.
so i said hey.
and she looked at me, very startled, and said hey back real small. like she’d been caught. and in a way, i suppose she had.
and i said it’s okay. you can just say it. i’ll be okay.
i’m always okay.
and she said: i’m really sorry.
i loved her, you know? it was highschool, but teenagers are capable of love. the way people love changes over time just as much as the way they stand, or the way they talk, but things don’t stop existing just because they're different. opposite really – a thing only stops changing when it's fully gone.
and i said, nothing to be sorry for, and i meant it. she looked a little relived, and i was happy to give her that peace. then she left. i watched her make it through the front door, because that was just habit at that point, and then i sat there a while afterwards, checking how i felt. and the answer was not good, but good enough to make it home. good enough to limp on.
so i put my car in reverse, took my last look goodbye, and immediately backed into her neighbor’s car.
crunch.
air bags didn't go off, which was good. i left a decent dent in the bumper of the other car. genuinely couldn’t tell if i did anything to my car – anything wrong with it just kind of blended together into the general ecosystem of hand mottled, sun cracked, chickenshit spackle.
i checked my glove box, and my car insurance info was, of course, out of date. my phone was dead too. as a teenager, my phone was less my lifeline to my friends, and more my tether to my parents, so i wasn’t particularly conscious of keeping it charged. both my fault.
i sat there a few minutes, trying to think of the best way to handle things, and there was only one answer i could think of, and i hated that answer, so i spent a few more minutes trying and failing to think of a better one, and then a few more coming to peace with what had to be done.
then i went back to knock on my now ex’s front door.
her dad opened, which i was very relieved over, even if he seemed less than thrilled. he looked me over, and in a firm, but slightly apologetic way said: she does not want to see you right now.
(i think he assumed i was going to try and talk her out of the break up?)
and i said not here for her. i just backed into your neighbor’s car, and i need to call my dad, but my phone’s dead. could i borrow yours?
and he looked at me, then back at his neighbors car, which sure enough was dented, then he looked at the chickenshitmobile, and if there was something wrong with it, it just kind of blended into the general Wrongness of the car, then back to me, and i could see him imagining the last ten minutes from my pov: getting broken up with, backing into a car, having to walk up to your exes door and borrow a phone, calling my dad to tell him that i just reversed into someone.
and his expression shifted from stern and apologetic to truly sad, which felt more kind that i deserved. things only got here because i kept fucking up - forgot to look behind me, forgot to replace the insurance forms, forgot to charge my phone. it was my mess, but his sympathy meant the world to me. i probably would’ve cried if he said sorry, or patted me on the back or called me sport, but instead he said
stay out here – i’ll bring you a phone.
and then he left.
i found a nice spot on the lawn in the shade under a sycamore, then settled into his grass.i was trying not to freak out, and was doing an okay job. he came out a minute or so later, not just with a phone, but a juicebox and a jar of green olives, which really threw a wrench in the whole try not to cry thing. soon as i saw those, a few tears squoze out. i was still hoping i could pass them off as Manly Tears but then he told me that he’d gotten the olives a few weeks before and had been meaning to hand them off to me, and that this was his last chance for that. then i made a sound like a horse drowning in a bog, and he patted my back pretty rough, four solid thumps, like he wasn't sure if i was crying or choking on an olive, and was trying to cover both bases at once.
then he went back inside, and i made a few more bog horse noises while finishing off the rest of the entire jar of green olives, and then i called my dad.
he was about ten minutes away that day, and luckily was home. he drove over, and we went to the neighbor’s house, and from there things actually went quite nice. the neighbor was a retired man who actually said he could fix the dent himself, no need for insurance. he said he appreciated that i didn't just drive off, and i said i was really sorry about his car, and he said he was really sorry about my car, and then he gestured to the chickenshitmobile and i laughed because it really was a disaster on wheels.
then we left.
i thought we were going to head straight home, but instead we went to a gas station, and we both got several slim jims that we folded into thick enough coils that we could put them on a hotdog bun because the growing up mormon equivalent of having a sad brewski with your dad is just choosing to make bad decisions sober. then he took me to the canals and we watched the sun turn all orange and pink, and he looked over at me and said:
brains are good at remembering bad days. so you gotta make sure that a bad day has a good part in it, so you can remember that too. remember that when you have a kid. try to do a good job on days like that - they're going to be a big part of how they remember you.
and then he gave me a big hug and said he was never going to eat another slim jim again.
---
the year after that i went to college, which kicked my butt in new and exciting ways. and on a lot of those bad days, after a test that went sour, or a faux paus that was particularly embarrassing, or some other hardship of my new adult life, i’d stop by the gas station and pick up leathery, half jerkied hotdog before heading to the canals to watch the sun set. i’d take a bite and imagine my dad next to me, grimacing through the slim-jim wad, asking what good thing i was going use that time to remember.
and in my head, i’d say you, dad.
i’m going to remember you.
#babylon-lore#dad lore#stories#breakups#gas station hotdogs#i really like green olives okay#i dont have a sense of smell so if food isnt like WHAM in the flavor department it just doesnt do a lot for me#in my sophomore year i ate so many homemade pickles that i actually got a wee bit of scurvy#major autism L
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CREEPED VISUAL NOVEL Link, tutorial, extra art, Q&A, some chatter
The CREEPED Prologue is completely free and browser-ready. Gameplay is about 10 minutes. Please read the "tutorial" and notes before playing!
Follow Y/N and their dog, Max, through their grandparents' farm and a mysterious forest filled with...less than fortunate people!
PLAY HERE; works best on PC
This visual novel is powered by GOOGLE SLIDES! It has 0 programming and was created by one person in a little over a month, so please bear with any "bugs" and clunkiness!
TUTORIAL
>Click using mouse/trackpad >Go slowly to not break game >Do not use arrow or space keys
EXTRA NOTES:
>Works best on PC/Browser, I haven't tested the full game on mobile yet >In general, clicking the PNGs on the textbox (Apple, Teddy Bear, Hatchet, etc) will lead you to the right page >If you land on a page that tells you to "go back," that's when you should click the back-arrow key. If your cursor disappears, it doesn't register the click correctly >I recommend moving your cursor periodically to avoid it disappearing and sending you to the wrong page
EXTRA ART
some WIPS and the original sprite-style i was gonna choose LOOOOOOOL
Q&A
Q: Is this an x reader? A: This is a reader-insert, but it's not romantic and I try to keep it as neutral and unidentifiable as possible! Q: What's the plot? A: GENERALLY AND WITHOUT SPOILERS, your dog gets you into trouble and you're just looking to help him!
Q: Who is in the prologue? A: Tim, Brian, Toby, and Kate! More will be added in future chapters.
Q: When will future chapters be posted? A: Not sure! This took me about a month to do, and half was spent over winter break. I will try to get chapter 1 posted before summer, but I am a full-time student, employed, have extracurriculars, etc etc
ok thats all i only remember 4 questions feel free to ask more LMAO
CHATTER(because you know i can talk forever)
ok i just wanted to be able to talk about how the process was with this and how i feel about the results and whatnot...
ive been wanting to make a google slides visual novel since i was like 13 LOL it hit the point where i was repeatedly told i should just learn to code but i was like NOOOOO ITS GOTTA BE GOOGLE SLIDESSSS which is totally stupid but hey. i think that gives it some sort of simple charm that reminds me of being 16 and doing little projects in my room LOL i like working with the easiest tools . my bad
anyway. im just very happy LOL. it's not perfect but i feel like i came full circle in a sense?!?! i've been into creepypasta since i was 9 and it comforted me when things were really hard, and when i was 18 i was going through a really hard time and got back into creepypasta as a way to distract myself. i've always had a habit of throwing myself into fiction for escapism when things suuucked.
i'm 20 now but i've met SO many amazing people, had so many fun awesome exciting projects with friends, created tons of stuff im proud of, felt more motivated to create since i was like 13, have been inspired by so many amazing artists/authors on here, etc. just so so so lucky to find community in such a tight-knit cute fandom that thrives off of creativity and playing around! i hope i can keep the momentum and make a couple more chapters this year, but im kinda busy with school and work...LOL . i'm just excited to have this posted so i can have more discussion about it T_T
anyway thank you if you read this far and thank you if you played etc etc yaahhhhhh omg ok BYE THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING im just so grateful to be in this fandom
#creepypasta#creepypasta fandom#crp fandom#creepypasta AU#crp Au#creepypasta game#creepypasta visual novel#creepypasta vn#ticci toby#toby rogers#kate the chaser#kate milens#tim wright#masky#masky marble hornets#hoody marble hornets#hoodie marble hornets#marble hornets#brian thomas#slenderman#creepypasta x reader#slenderverse#fandom#fanart#sweetart#CRPED VN
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#I know life is hard and we shouldn't take it personally and we should never expect people to coddle us and blah blah#but really I would like to just survive one day without someone being mean to me#I don't even need a day of people being nice#truly I would just take one completely mundane day where I didn't get cursed out or yelled at or spoken down to#and yes I'm well aware this is partially my fault because one person in particular I surround myself with is trash#but it's not just him#my sister cursed me out and accused me of insulting her because I said I didn't agree with her on something#I didn't even say she was wrong I legit told her her feelings were valid and that it was just hard for me to see it from the same#perspective#and when she got upset i took it all back and said I was wrong and apologized and still she berated me over messenger until I cried because#I didn't know what else to say#and even though I'm sick#I got up and cooked dinner for my family and I cleaned up the whole mess and put it all away but I didn't do the dishes because I was#struggling and had to lay back down#and my mom came out and did not say thanks for dinner or thanks for cleaning up or anything of the sort#she came out rolled her eyes scoffed gestured to the dishes in the sink and said you have a mess here#and then proceeded to complain about how I didn't do the dishes#and that's stupid to let that bother me but I swear it's an every day thing and like I was so proud of myself for getting up and cooking an#cleaning up my mess because I was struggling to get out of bed at all#and still all she can bring up is the negative and no matter what i do it's always like that never a positive note#and for the record my mom lives with me for free taking over my son's bedroom it's not like i left dishes in her house it's my dishes in my#house#and ofc my son's father found a way to yell at me but i don't even count that anymore#and i'm just emotionally drained#and it feels like lately it's just an every day thing and i'm so fucking tired#I can't remember the last time someone said anything kind to me at all and that's not an exaggeration#no one ever says i love you or i'm proud of you or thanks for doing that or this helps alot or you got this or you're good at this#and I just wish someone could see something good in me for once
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#it's been. a week. and this upcoming week is only going to continue.#i have 40 dollars to my name. my entire family bar my mother is ill. we are flying internationally to go home.#my sister spent all evening sobbing in my arms because she's also sick which means she can't do the things she really really wanted to#*i* haven't been able to do anything since day 2 of said holiday and so i've missed the entire thing and that's not at all gutting#and the government *still* won't pay me. so again 41.85 to my name.#i'm sort of just waiting for everything to implode even worse.#like. something else has to go wrong. there's no way that we're finished with whatever this hell is.#it's just shit. really shit. i feel like shit. both physically and mentally.#it's just like a massive set back. i feel like i don't know my limits again.#oh hey! crying made you feel like you couldn't sit up on your own! congrats!#walking outside to sit in the sun while people were out took you out for a day and a half!#and like. i'm not recovered at all so it might change but this is so fucking scary#i don't want to do this again. i don't.
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“What? You’re married? And you’re a dad?”
Yuji finds out that 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 has a family. — same au as this ♡
Yuji Itadori wanted to know more about the world’s strongest sorcerer, who he was lucky enough to have as his teacher.
The two of them walked along the sidewalk peacefully after completing a bit of training.
As Yuji devoured his blue popsicle, his wide eyes stared at the side of his teacher’s face.
Despite the black blindfold covering his ocean blue eyes, Gojo could feel his student’s eyes on him for two minutes straight.
“I’m surprised you haven’t bumped into something yet,” Gojo spoke up, breaking the silence as he smiled slightly. “Why are you staring at me? Something on my face?”
“No, I just had a question I wanted to ask you — can I?” Yuji tilted his head a bit.
“Don’t be silly, of course you can. What is it?”
“There’s a ring on your finger.”
Gojo was silent for a moment, but his amused grin widened. Eventually, he said, “that’s not a question, Yuji.”
“I know, I know, I just . . .” Yuji hesitated. After all, discussing such a personal topic with someone as superior as Satoru Gojo could have been disrespectful. Even so, he took his chances anyway. “Are you married?”
“I am.”
“Really?” Yuji smiled excitedly. He tossed his discolored popsicle stick in a nearby trashcan, and continued his late afternoon stroll with Gojo.
“Yeah, I’ve been married for eight years. Our anniversary is coming up pretty soon, actually. Think I’ll plan some sort of trip.”
“Wow, that’s really cool! Who are you married to? Do I know ‘em? What are they like?”
Due to his unwavering grin, Gojo felt a burning sensation in his light pink, blushed cheeks. Thinking about you had always resulted in him smiling so much, his face would hurt.
“You don’t know her, but Megumi does. Her name is Y/N, and she isn’t a sorcerer anymore, just an ordinary person who enjoys ordinary things, and I love that more than anything. Our daughter is-”
“What?” Yuji suddenly halted his footsteps.
“Hm? Something wrong?” Gojo questioned as he stopped walking, turning around to face the shocked boy.
“You have a daughter? Like an actual kid?” Yuji paused. “How come you never mentioned any of this before? How old is she? I wanna meet your family! Why have I never met them?”
“She‘s four,” Gojo laughed softly, and started to resume his walk along with Yuji. “Guess I had no idea you assumed I had no family, but it’s fine, you can meet them anytime you want. Wanna see a couple of pictures?”
“Yeah!” Flashing a bright smile, Yuji eagerly waited for Gojo to unlock his phone and scroll through his photos.
After only a couple of seconds — as it didn’t take the older man any time at all to find a photo of the two most beloved people in his life — Gojo handed his phone to Yuji, showing him a recent picture of the three of you hanging out at the park.
“Oh man, is that your wife? She’s really, really pretty, and your kid looks like the perfect combination of you both! Well, I guess that makes sense because you’re her parents, but it’s like fifty-fifty! She has your eyes, but Mrs. Gojo’s hair . . .” Yuji zoomed in and out of the photo as he rambled on, even taking it upon himself to search Gojo’s photos for even more pictures. “No way, is that Mrs. Gojo and Fushiguro? Fushiguro looks so young!”
“Yeah, he was around seven years old at the time. Me and Y/N were just dating then, but I knew I wanted to marry her. Best decision of my life.”
“When can I meet them?” Yuji asked, his brown eyes sparkling with hope.
“Why do you wanna meet them so badly?” Gojo reached out and grabbed his phone from Yuji, who had started to scroll a bit too far.
“Well, isn’t it obvious?” Smiling, Yuji paused. “You’re kinda like family to me now, I guess. So, I wanna meet the people you cherish the most, ‘cause I wanna cherish them too.”
Gojo didn’t say another word. Not to Yuji, at least. Instead, he hummed with satisfaction at his student’s kind words, and pulled out his phone, scrolling through his contacts until he found yours.
“Hi, baby,” Gojo greeted you over the phone, “Would you mind if I bring a student of mine over for dinner? He really wants to meet you . . . he’s not allergic to anything . . . Okay . . . That works for us . . . Tell my muffin that I’ll be home soon . . . I love you more, bye sweetheart.”
“Okay, we-”
“Great! Which way is your house? Which way? Is it this way?” Yuji excitedly started to run off in no particular direction, and Gojo couldn’t help but laugh.
While Yuji said he simply wanted to cherish Gojo’s family, Gojo knew that it was a bit deeper than that. After all, as far as Yuji was concerned, he had no one. He craved the domestic nature of a loving family. He was all alone.
Once they made it to Gojo’s home, Yuji excitedly greeted you with a hug as if he had known you his entire life.
He adored your food, laughing and chatting at the dinner table.
He adored your home, carefully admiring your decorations and asking plenty of questions.
He was also kind enough to help out with the dishes, and play with dolls with your daughter afterwards, using silly voices as he truly got into the role.
And, later on, when he saw Gojo grab your grinning face and shower it with kisses, and his little girl happily run up to him as he picked her up, tickling her as she giggled, Yuji silently hoped that one day, he too would have a family just as loving.
But, he didn’t have to observe the happy family from a distance much longer, as, suddenly, you and Gojo waved the boy over, and wrapped your arms around him in a silly, loving, group hug.
And he felt loved.
— PART III —
#dad!gojo#fem reader#female reader#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#gojo satoru x reader#satoru gojo x reader#satoru x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk fluff#gojo fluff#satoru gojo fluff#gojo x y/n#gojo x you#jjk gojo x reader#gojo x reader fluff#jjk x reader fluff#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk fic#gojo fic
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pls write for thanos with hatefucking… like that man has that potential after seeing how he talks to the other contestants
Thanos/Choi Su-Bong - Hatefucking
Synopsis: You and Thanos hate each other and, no matter how many death threats he sends your way, you never listen. So he decides that, if threats don't work, maybe you need to be fucked instead.
A/N: wrote this in like two hours max so it may not be the best but I tried anyway !! I love Thanos so much and hatefuck with him has me thirstyy
Warnings: smut, penetrative sex, blowjob, degradation, thanos is a little meanie and you're sassy
If there was one thing that could be said for sure about Thanos, it's that he was a total fucking dickhead.
From the very first game you played in this hellhole, he had been nothing but a problem. He skipped around like he owned the place and had no problem with sacrificing a few people. Not to mention, he was loud. So annoyingly loud.
Unfortunately for you, he seemed to really hate you too. Maybe it was the fact you kept glaring at him like he did something or the way you'd make some sort of sarcastic comment every time he spoke. Whatever the reason, the feeling was mutual. He hated you. You hated him. That was the end of it.
Well, it should've been.
As if some divine being took joy in your pain, Thanos walked up to you while you were alone with an angry look - clearly having something to say to you. You could guess he was going to try to threaten you into choosing to continue the games next vote since you had chosen not to.
“Yo. It'd be in your best interest to choose the blue button. It's really pissing me off when you keep pressing that red x button every time,” he spoke as he looked down at you from where you sat.
“Or what?” You say as you stand up and look at him with disdain. You weren't about to let this idiot try to scare you into doing what he wants. You weren't his slave. “Or I'll fucking kill you,” he says as he steps closer with a look that seemed like he meant it. Honestly, you didn't doubt that he was telling the truth. He's been killing people since the first game and it certainly won't be any different for you.
“Ooh, scary,” you say sarcastically before pushing past him. You didn't get far before he grabbed your wrist and turned you around, pulling you close to him. “You don't think I'll do it? Cause you'd be wrong,” he says as he looks at you dead in the eyes. You harshly pulled your wrist away from his grip and gave him a scoff.
“You're too much of a pussy to do shit. The only thing that gives you confidence are those dumb little pills you take,” you say as you look at him, challenging him to say something else.
It was quiet as you two just stared at each other, both silently praying for the other's death. He lets out an annoyed huff before finally breaking eye contact to look to the side. Without another word, he pushes past you and walks back to the other side of the room where the rest of the people who wanted to continue playing the game were. If that idiot really thought he could sway you, he'd soon learn you aren't swayed by death threats from high dumbasses.
When it came time to vote, you could feel Thanos staring you down. You turned your head to look back at him with an eyebrow raised and he turned his head away. You could see the annoyance all over his face.
One by one, each player went up and placed their vote. The numbers were quite even and it was hard to tell who'd end up victorious in this vote. When it was Thanos's turn to vote, he made a point of stopping right behind you before he walked down.
“Remember what I said earlier. I'll kill you,” he whispers before walking past and skipping down towards the buttons. He kissed the blue button before walking over to the corresponding side but he was looking straight at you.
You ignored his hard glare and walked down to the buttons. You raised your hand and, no surprise, pressed the red button. You turned to him and flipped him off with a small smirk before walking off to the other side.
For a moment, you actually thought you'd get away with that because it seemed that more people wanted to leave now. However, that was not the case as the result ended up being a tie.
Great. You were stuck here for longer. You definitely wouldn't be able to avoid Thanos if you were stuck here till tomorrow. He didn't seem to walk up to you immediately. It was like he was waiting for the right time to strike. All he did was stare at you from across the room as if he was formulating the most brutal way to tear you limb by limb. And, wow, he stared at you for a very long time.
It wasn't until there were 5 minutes before lights out did he come to you. You were all by yourself in a corner and no one seemed to be paying much attention. They were all so busy in their own whispered conversations.
“Hey, it seems you didn't understand me the first time,” he says as he grabs you by your shirt and pushes you against the wall behind you. “I said I'd kill you if you pressed the red button,” he continues as he looks at you with annoyance.
“Go ahead then. Kill me,” you say as you look at him with a small smirk. He might have already killed a few people but you didn't believe he'd have the guts to kill people outside of the games.
He was quiet. All he did was stare. It was as if he was calculating some thoughts. He looked toward the timer on the wall before looking back at you.
“You're fucking unbearable,” he speaks before he's suddenly slamming his lips against yours. You didn't expect this move. You expected him to stab you or choke you - not kiss you.
You push him away with a glare. You couldn't be kissing this idiot. You hated him and he was fucking stupid. But even with that hate, there was something about the way he kissed you that had you thinking twice.
Fuck, you were doing this.
You pulled him in by his collar and pressed your lips against his. There was nothing romantic about this kiss. It was pure hate. Just angry, rough kissing as if it would solve anything. His hands were all over your body before they finally decided to settle on your hips with a tight grip. He pulled away before starting to leave kisses along your neck. He wasn't gentle at all. He was biting you as if he wanted to draw blood.
“You're such a fucking bitch. Always acting so smug. I'm gonna shut you the fuck up,” he says as his hand goes to your hair before yanking it back roughly to give him better access to your neck.
“You're the fucking bitch. Always walking around like you own the place,” you say back and in response he bites your neck hard making you wince slightly at the pain. “watch your fucking mouth,” he spoke as he pulled away and wrapped a hand around your throat. As if on cue, the lights suddenly turned off leaving you two in the dark.
He let out a small laugh as it went dark before he removed the hand on your hip and instead started pulling your pants down.
“I'm gonna fuck you till you learn you're not in control, I am,” he says before pulling his own pants down. He wasn't going to play nice or take it easy. Not when you hadn't played nice with him.
“You think you can fuck me into submission? You're way too fucking cocky,” you say with a quiet laugh, finding it amusing how he thought you'd fold once he started fucking you. “We’ll see,” he says, his grip around your throat tightening to shut you up. He pulled his boxers down slightly, enough to let his dick out, before he pushed your panties to the side.
“I'm gonna show you not to fuck with me again,” he whispers into your ear as he lines himself up with your entrance. Without another word, he starts slowly thrusting himself in till he's all the way inside you.
“You're such a fucking whore,” he says as he starts to pull out before thrusting in again with one stroke. He kept a pace of being fast and hard as if trying to make you feel his hate on a spiritual level.
Well, God you could definitely feel it. He kept leaving aggressive bites all over your neck as he thrust into you. His hand around your neck kept its firm grip, enjoying the way you struggled to breathe.
He wasn't fucking you for pleasure, he was fucking you to make you learn a lesson. He wanted to make you cum. He wanted to choke you till your vision got blurry. He wanted it to be clear he hated you with every fiber of his being.
His free hand went down to your clit and he pinched it before rubbing it with a circular motion. He wasn't gentle so it brought a mix of both pain and pleasure. A feeling that brought you closer to the edge of a sweet, sweet release. He could feel you tighten around his cock and it made him let out a groan which turned into a small mocking laugh.
“Fuck, are you- going to cum? Already?” He says mockingly with a smirk. He took pleasure in knowing he could control you like this. Control someone who seemed to hate him. “C'mon, cum on my cock then, whore,” he said before pressing his lips to yours roughly. He forced his tongue into your mouth and he was clearly eager to get you to cum.
With a slight angle of his hips, he thrusted into just the right spot that had you tipping far over the edge. He let out a groan at the feeling of you coming undone on his cock before he quickly pulled out.
He released your throat and grabbed your hair instead before forcing you onto your knees. You looked up at him with a glare and he returned it with the corner of his mouth just barely quirked up. “suck my cock so I can come,” he said as he brought his cock closer to your mouth. He really didn't hesitate when you opened your mouth and immediately forced himself in with a groan at the feeling.
“God.. do you taste yourself on my dick?” He says as he looks down at you. He thrusts into your mouth making you gag and he just laughed like it was the funniest thing in the world. “You're such a fucking bitch when you talk shit. I like you better like this,” he speaks as he mercilessly thrusts into your mouth, his tip hitting the back of your throat over and over again.
“I'm gonna cum in your mouth and you're gonna swallow, yeah?” He says before throwing his head back with a groan. It didn't take long before you felt his cum run down your throat. He thrusted a little more as he came down from his high before finally pulling out of your mouth. There was drool running down your chin as he pulled his boxers and pants up before kneeling in front of you.
“Swallow my cum,” he orders as he tilts his head at you and waits. You look up at him before turning your head and spitting onto the floor instead.
“I think I'll pass,” you say as you look up at him once again with a glare. Tension rose between you two again but this time, it was different. Sure, it was hate, but there was undeniably a different punishment waiting instead of an argument.
“Then I guess you haven't learnt your lesson,”
#squid game#squid game x reader#squid game 2#squid game season 2#choi su bong#choi su bong smut#thanos squid game#x reader smut
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