#and obvs yes

[green-eyes-and-orange-ties]

if you aren't willing to tear the very fabric of reality to save someone whilst knowing that doing so will undoubtly lead to your own demise, and that is assuming that you survive the ground giving way beneath you because you were incapable of leaving that person incase they couldn't survive ...

Did you even love them?

[coochiekrab]

getting hitched without a hitch (there were many hitches actually)

[zzz-sunflowr]

"blah blah men can be oppressed bc they aren't allowed to cry and express emotion"

they aren't allowed to do that bc that's perceived as feminine.

the feminine is being demonized.

it still comes back to oppression of the FEMININE.

[ministarfruit]

stardew valley marriage candidates

[choccy-milky]

nothing like some rest and relaxation after a long day of travelling 😇💕 ((from my oneshot! ao3/wattpad))

[turtleblogatlast]

AU where Leo is trapped in the Prison Dimension for months instead of minutes and the only way he gets by with his sanity intact is through recording himself talking to his wrist comm.

When they finally manage to get Leo back and make him rest up to heal, Donnie can’t help but listen to the recordings left behind.

He’s not sure what exactly he’s expecting, only that his subconscious is screaming at him that it has to be heartbreaking, that it has to be torturous.

Instead, what Donnie is subject to is a full thousand hours’ worth of Jupiter Jim and Lou Jitsu crossover fanfiction. More than one part in the series. Spanning well over a million words.

(The worst part is that it’s actually good.)

[sleepis4theweak]

This is how I got my reputation as the chill one in the group...

(I was concerned of course, but I mean she was there... fine... and I assumed they were gonna continue with the story so I had 0 reaction)

[electroempathy]

Objectifying old maniel is how I keep the horrors at bay. Sorry mr Bogosian.

[aardvaark]

the leverage team would have had a games night… once. everyone cheated so much and in such increasingly extreme ways that all mentions of monopoly are banned in their headquarters (this makes talking about marks who monopolize the market very confusing)

[soadscrawl]

1 like = 1 beating the triangle to death for fucking up whatever unhinged coworker/roommate/unspecified relationship these two had going on

[teaboot]

I love your post about being a security guard. Would you please tell us about some of the cool people you meet at work?

Ooooh I can do that!

One time on foot patrol I got called to talk to a guy who had his pet off-leash, right? And there's a pretty big road nearby, and some restaurants, so I head over to see if I can convince him to leash what I believe to be his dog before it runs into a diner or humps the wrong leg or gets clipped or whatever

But I get there. And I see the guy, he's exactly as described, but there's no dog nearby so I'm kinda confused

But then I see his parrot

And I'm trying to keep a straight face when I get there but I'm in uniform and he sees me and stops and the three of us (me, him, parrot) kind of just stare at each other

And I dont know what to say, I have not been trained for this, and I'm trying to figure out if this is even a problem or not, so I just tell the guy, "I'm gonna be real with you man, this is a new one for me".

And to his credit the dude was actually very kind and polite, introduced me to the bird and all. Little fella made some *frighteningly intelligent* eye contact with me the whole time, of course.

Anyways it turns out the bird was about sixteen years old and smarter than me, so I told them they were both above my pay grade and were good to go as long as they didn't go into any eating establishments, since technically it'd be a contamination risk.

VERY cool afternoon.

Also another time a very cheerful woman claimed she could read auras and told me mine was yellow, and I got to tell her that yellow was my favourite colour, which was cool!

And one night I was on mall duty and I found six teenagers all crammed into one of those 25-cent kiddie rides shaped like a school bus, which was hilarious, but I had to tell 'em "I am so sorry, this is the best thing I've seen all day, but I do need yall outta there, I love you all" (the ride things have weight limits and break down constantly, it's a pain in the ass.)

Aw shit, this other time I found two teen boys pushing each other in a shopping cart- and they were having such a great time, I felt so bad, it's exactly the kind of shit my brothers would do- and I think that one was like "sorry guys, liabilities, do it where I can't see you".

And this one probably shouldn't be funny but there was this guy with a bike, right? Belligerent, abusive towards staff, falling-down drunk, you know? And I was supposed to get him out of the building, but instead when I asked him to make his way out he jumped onto the bike and started riding around me in circles shouting "WHORE! WHORE! WHOOOOOOOORE!"

Same guy, the day that I first met him, he was peeing at a payphone- I asked him for his name and he straightened up, put his shoulders back, and said with all confidence, "My name is Donald Finkley and I take it up the butt!"

His name was not Donald Finkley. The real Donald Finkley was someone he just didn't like very much

[andy-clutterbuck]

Black T-Shirt + Sling | requested by Anonymous

[meaningtotellyou]

am i the only one who doesn’t feel any differently about eras tour after hearing i can do it with a broken heart

[lordfries]

early flynn os tron my beloved

[gods-perfect-idiots]

that old man yaoi brainrot got me good, folks

[peacockrulz]

back on my shit

bonus: it worked (idea by my brother n friends lol)