#and now. after i put in so much extra effort and have been wearing myself out for weeks

[mocha-blossom]

God I want to cry so badly

Anytime I put effort into anything in school I only get rewarded with mediocrity. And people wonder why learning is no fun for students anymore

[faeryarchives]

savanaclaw with a furina - like female reader!

the "regina of all waters, kindreds, peoples and laws" is deeply loved by all. under her flamboyant and imprudent facade, lies a girl holding an unbearable weight and guilt on her shoulders to save her people. note: as requested and i love furina sm hihi i will also write for other dorms warning: major spoilers for genshin archon quest other fics: heartslabyul with a furina-like reader & i'm not jealous !! & to my beloved & more than words

-‘๑’- leona kingscholar

"huh? what is the esteemed dorm leader of savanaclaw doing in front of my house?" "... why do you look like you didn't sleep for days? nevermind, take back your pets - they've been following me the whole day and poking me with water." "oh my archons, they like you!"

leona knew different kinds of people, faes and beastmen but never a god! not that you broadcasted it to the world - of course he heard it while grim was chatting away from the garden

so this lion observed your moves and to be honest, you were just like an ordinary person

"what are you doing hiding behind me?" "ahem! you know, i don't really know the forest that much so i would appreciate if i would put myself behind yo- ahhh! what is that?!" "it's just a branch, herbivore. i never knew you are scared of branches."

he actually gained another chess player buddy - he discovered it at the cost of being drenched in water from your water familiars

never he would imagine how on earth did you not go crazy standing in for your archon and acting for so so long? and despite belittling you and your friend group, he couldn't believe his ears when you stood up for him against the other dorms

"what leona did was wrong but how would you feel if all the trainings and efforts were all in naught and overlooked by the people you considered as family? imagine if your fate has already been sealed before you were even born?"

oh, he didn't expect you of all people to do that honestly + not so bad at all so expect a lot of sweets everyday curtesy of this lion

don't tell anyone but with you acting just as yourself and discovering your passions with him as a witness - leona feels proud like a lion watching his cub succeed

extra: you and cheka really go along well to the point that leona thinks cheka might replace him with you someday

-‘๑’- ruggie bucchi

ruggie trusts his skills in sneaking around and swiping things if needed and he will bet that no one could ever discover him immediately

"after pulling a prank on grim and my salon members, you must think that i am much of a gullible fool?"

now you both did really met at a rough start - the hyena thought you would be more snobbish and not to mingle with people below his level especially after hearing you being a god

but seeing you shielding him during leona's overblot and regularly visiting him during his recovery at the clinic made him questioned his thoughts about you

"why are you always visiting me? i thought you hated me?" "...? where did you get that nonsense? if i do hate you, i would go out of my way to buy these doughnuts for you."

well look at you two now! close like two peas in a pod - you really enjoyed spending time with ruggie because you were seeing the world in a different perspective

having hard time picking your new macaroni menu for the day? no worries, ruggie will make sure you will be able to cook other meals than this. not good with bargaining with sam? hold his groceries, he have this in the bag.

"more interesting trinkets for me~!" "oh you collect trinkets? why didn't you say so?"

omg new trinket collector buddy 🥺 whenever you give him something such as a bracelet or even a hairclip he will wear it like a badge of honor

it's alright to help other students but he is worried that being to kind in nrc might backfire on you

"you shouldn't be too trusting here. i know you just want to help but like your friends said - you should also help yourself at times."

while he might not look like it but ruggie can sense your mood change accurately especially when it involves the topic of your past

this one whole year on nrc might not be comparable to your 500 years of living but ruggie will make sure that it will be the best one

-‘๑’- jack howl

other than the adeuce and grim team - jack is the person you actually vibe with!

maybe its because his sense of justice and responsibility reminds you of a dear friend back home and it actually comforts you to see it + makes you feel less homesick

this man is very used to his little siblings so expect him to come off as a brotherly vibes + probably makes you an exemption to touching his ears and letting your salon members put some design in his hair

"... do you think these three would be great teammates during magift competitions?"

"hmmm, i must say they do make a great team. what if we bring it up to leona, i think these three will enjoy it very much."

well the dorm leader liked the idea but seeing how they acted during the practice - it's safe to say it is very risky because they only listen to you, jack and leona

ANYWAYS jack sometimes come to the ramshackle dorm just to wake you up knowing you probably stayed up late reading your novels

he tried inviting you to his morning run only to see you the next day already tired and carrying you on his back after one run

"you can't blame me okay! i was born to drama and directing not in running!"

speaking of carrying you on his back he sometimes do it just because he wants to especially when jack knows too well how much you overwork yourself

while he can read you very well, you can also read this guy by the book through his ears and tail movement

"... jack what are you doing here so late?" "…what? it’s not like i was waiting for you or anything." "i never said that though?" "hmp." while he look away, his tail would impatiently wag and hit the wall behind him making you laugh "uhuh, whatever you say. let's go back to our dorms now big guy."

it turns out that while spending the whole afternoon up to evening, jack wanted to accompany you back to the dorm safely - worried that someone is bullying you because you were down for days.

he is not that expressive with words - but just know that jack will always be your friend despite your upbringings or not being open to tell your past, he understands it pretty well

[henza-hex]

My Husband's Secret 3

Leo's POV (the husband)

We've been years together and only now I discovered Edward's fetish, it feels weird sometimes, but I'm getting used to.

The funny thing is that I've always been gassy, won all of the burping contests in school, cleared many rooms after mexican food, but I wasn't going all that gas ruin my marriage, I just didn't know that it would ignite it even more.

And there he was, sleeping as I had to get up for work... I want me some some quick breakfast without having any effort, so let's change that.

I always wake up with the gas that has been brewing all night, so I covered his head under the blanket and leaned to the side, just for him to wake up to the sight of my ass greeting him... and now... HNNGG...

Edward's POV

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPBPBPBPBPBBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTFTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!

." I say, slaI'm woken up by a LOUD bang, followed by a nasty gust of wind on my face, as I open my eyes, I'm greet by two massive cheeks in front of me, as I'm surrounded by this stinky cloud of gas.

I pinched myself, am I dreaming?

*COUGH* *COUGH*

"Wakey, were you going to sleep all day?" I heard him asking above me.

I take the blanket off, and he is laughing, greeting me with a shit-eating grin. Of course, that was fucking hot, but I slapped him for good measure.

"Hahaha what? Didn't you like that?" He continues to laugh, not taking me seriously.

I lay my head on his chest and answer. "Of course, you silly, but you deserved that. Just... I waited so long for this, I think I don't know how to react seeing you being so comfortable with it, even cheeky." I say, slapping him again.

"Ouch, did I deserve that too?" He asks, meeting me with some puppy eyes.

"Yes." I get up. "And some breakfast too, get ready, I'll call when it's finished."

_____________________________________________________________

After the table is ready, I called him downstairs for breakfast. Of course he is wearing his suit and is looking extra hot in it. Those grey trousers should be forbidden, nothing should hug my man's curves better than me, but they do.

As we sat, I didn't talk much because I couldn't stop thinking about all of this situation, I finally got what I wanted, what now? Fortunately my thought were interrupted by belly pats and a loud belch.

BUUUUUURPPP

"Delicious, baby, I'm gonna wake you up all mornings for that."

That helped me to dissociate a little, and kissed his cheek. "With that way earlier, you can wake me up at morning even on weekends."

He pulled me close and made me sit on his lap. "So... let me put dutch-ovens on my daily routine."

"What about burp-kisses too?" I felt ridiculous asking for that, but he simply grabbed the back of my head to pull me into a kiss, opening his mouth intertwined with mine, as he...

OOOOOooooooOOOOUUUUURRRRRPPPPP...

"Haha, damn, that was deep." He joked as I gagged on the smell, things are escalating quickly. "But now I have to go, baby. Come here again, now for a real kiss." He kissed me on the lips, ready to go, but I held his hand.

"Baby, before you go. I have something to talk about."

"Yes?"

"You know I had these... preferences for a long time, right? And before you discovered about it, I had to come out of my way to fulfill my fantasies without you, but... now, you're my fantasy."

"To deep before 10 AM, love. What do you mean?"

I had to laugh, my made me to have courage to do it.

"Hm... I mean, I fantasized about you, you know those stories I used to read? You were always the main character in my head..."

Impressingly, no laughs this time. I couldn't read his thoughts this time. Too far?

"Interesting... but I have to go now." He kissed me deeply, and went to the door.

"Til later... baby... HNNGG..."

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTT

Of course he had to tease me a last time before work.

______________________________________________________________

Leo's POV

Marrying Edward is wild, everytime he comes up with something. Gassy and teasing coworker right now, how I'm gonna make that work?

"You're so quiet today, Leo. What's up?" asked Damian, he is pretty much my best bud here, one of those BIG bodybuilder guys, tattoos, hairy, can't find many suits that actually fit his size, although, always boisterous and energic, one of the best companies in this dead office. He recently married and I was his best man. He and Alex make a great couple.

"Nothing, just some worries at home. You?"

"Ahh, don't even get me started on home. We moved together, and I'm trying to convince Alex to experiment new things with me, you know? We gotta work so we don't fall into boredom like most of the couples."

Was not expecting such a straight-foward answer but I'm... happy that there are no secrets between us? Well...

"Yes... boredom... Edward is never boring, the opposite of that, pretty wild." I didn't know what to say, those wild kinks never fit into a lunch conversation.

"Hahaha he is just like me then! I'm the one pushing Alex for new things, contracts, BDSM... even one of my secret kinks." he leaned close to whisper. "Eproctophilia."

"W-what is that?" I think I was sweating, is everybody freaky nowadays?

"You know, burping and farting... always got a thing for that. Alex acts grossed out but I think deep down he enjoys it. I just wanted to share my gas, making him sniff my farts, burp down on his throat... a distant dream" Damian finished his line of thought and we might be able to help each other.

"Uhm... Edward got this thing too, but he likes my gas instead..."

Damian boasted in a big laugh. "YOU? AND YOU DO THAT FOR HIM? How could I imagine?? HAHAHAHAHA"

"Don't laugh, I'm serious... and now he wants to roleplay..."

"ROLEPLAY? Gosh, you got a freaky fella in your house, I wish Alex was like that."

"Well... I can give you some tips to discover if he's into that, and you help me with what I can do for Edward..."

"Deal."

[seenoversundown]

Sultry

Josh Kiszka x Quinn (Enby OC)

Warnings: Fluff, Thoughts/Discussion of having children, Jake’s ratty boots, sandcastles, improper (or proper, depending 🤭) use of “daddy”

Word Count: 2.5k

Summary: The crew has a beach day and Quinn has to grapple with how hot Josh is when he takes care of others.

Author's Note: This one is a little bit short, but I don’t want to give too much away before you all actually meet Josh and Quinn 🤭 Please enjoy!

Ramblin'

Where to begin?

I taste the summer on your peppery skin

“Summersong” The Decemberists.

When Danny and Melody floated the idea of a family beach day at Rangeley Lake a few weeks ago, I had been convinced it would never come to fruition. Jake runs a tight ship at the bar, so I was sure he’d take issue with all four boys being away for the day. But Jake either decided to live a little, or he knew we’d never let him live it down if we missed out on a beach day because of him. Regardless of his reason, he left the bar in the hands of one of his steady bartenders for the day.

And so, I find myself surrounded by bags and spinning in a circle in the bedroom, trying to remember what I'm doing.

Double-checking the supplies, that's right.

“Bug!! Are you ready? We need to head out in about 15 minutes!” Josh yells from across our apartment.

I shift items around the bags I’ve been packing all morning, taking stock to ensure we have everything.

Sunblock, extra clothes, extra shoes, kindle, towels, a blanket…

“Yeah, Starlight! I think we’re good to go!” I shout back.

I jump, feeling his arms wrap around my middle as he rests his head in the crook of my shoulder.

“No need to yell; I'm right here,” he whispers against the shell of my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. He presses a kiss directly below my ear before slowly pulling away and spinning me around to face him.

“You scared me,” I giggle, staring into his eyes.

“I’m sorry, dear. I was just coming to see if you needed help getting our bags to the car.”

He moves toward the bed and slips them over his arms, rushing out of the room before I can even respond.

He loves caring for me; he’ll be such a good dad one day.

The thought slips into my head before I can even hope to stop it. It’s a conversation we’ve kicked around a few times, usually after a few glasses of wine, but not anything we’ve discussed seriously.

I shake my head to stop further thoughts from creeping in.

We’ll table that for now.

I hear the front door click closed, signaling that Josh is headed down to load the car, and I walk out to the living room to put on my sandals. I sit on the couch, pulling out my phone to check The Girl's group chat.

Wilson: Sam and I are about to get in the car

Charmander: I’m fighting with Jacob about appropriate shoes for the lake.

Charmander: Again.

Melli Vanelli: Loafers?

Charmander: …His boots this time 😫

Wilson: If he shows up in those boots, he’ll never hear the end of it.

Charmander: I have told him that. He insists he doesn't care.

Melli Vanelli: Last time he insisted he didn’t care about being made fun of…

Wilson: HE ENDED UP WITH A GIRLFRIEND AFTER YEARS OF INSISTING HE DIDN’T WANT ONE.

Wilson: No offense, Char

Charmander: None taken.

I laughed, remembering the group effort of gentle bullying that led Jake to find the love of his life semi-reluctantly.

Me: I vote we let him wear the boots.

Me: Maybe we can bully him into finally throwing them away.

Charmander: You may have a point, Quinn.

Wilson: Only time will tell

The door clicks, and Josh sweeps back in.

“Ready, darling?”

I let out one final chuckle and stood up from the couch. I slipped my phone into the front pocket of my overall shorts before walking over to Josh.

“I am, my love,” I say, leaning forward and kissing the tip of his nose.

The way his cheeks heat up at the small gesture makes my stomach swoop.

He laces his fingers through mine and gestures toward the door.

“Your chariot awaits!”

I follow him out the door and down to the car, hopping into the passenger's seat.

__________________________________

We pull up to the main parking lot about 2 hours later, and my limbs scream at me.

“Thank God,” I practically shout in Josh’s face as he opens my door.

I hop out of the car and shake my legs out.

“I’m too old to remain in one position for so long.”

“Oh, is that so?” Josh gives me a wink.

“Don’t.”

“Don’t what?”

“You know exactly what,” I roll my eyes but can’t help the giggle that bubbles out of me.

“Mmm, I don't think I do,” he grabs the straps of my overalls and pulls me in for a kiss.

I look around the parking lot, noting that we are somehow the first couple here.

Interesting considering Sam and Willa were the first to leave. I’ll file that away for later. Oh well, better make the most of it.

“Alright, let’s go claim a spot before the other tourists descend.”

We grab our cooler and bags and wander to the beach, claiming a spot closer to the treeline at the lake's edge.

I watch as Josh lays out our towels and sets up an umbrella.

“My baby won’t get a sunburn today,” he says, pulling a tube of sunscreen out of one of our bags, “now lay down and take your clothes off.”

I roll my eyes at his phrasing but unbuckle the straps of my overalls and slide them down, leaving me in my olive-green sports bra and swim shorts.

I set my clothes aside, lay on the towel in front of me, and close my eyes, feeling the sun soak into my skin.

Josh crawls overtop of me, straddling my hips and places a featherlight kiss between my shoulder blades.

“You’d think after all this time I'd be used to it, but your beauty is staggering.”

What did I do to deserve him?

He opens the sunscreen and squeezes a bit into his hands, rubbing them together to warm it up before massaging it into my shoulders.

A small moan escapes my lips as he hits a particularly tense spot.

“Jesus Christ”

I jump, hearing Sam’s voice to my left.

“They’re at it again, Bird!”

“Leave them alone, Sam,” Willa snarks, “they're in love.”

“Can’t they be in love like that in private?”

I feel Josh shift on top of me, and I lift my head, opening my eyes just in time to catch a glimpse of Sam being smacked in the chest by the bottle of sunscreen.

I huff a small laugh through my nose and pat Josh’s leg, signaling him to let me up.

“Sorry, Sam. We take sun safety very seriously,” I start, “but that’s beside the point. Would you care to tell us why you allegedly were the first to leave, but we somehow got here before you?”

I fix him with a wicked grin, and he quickly shuts up.

“That’s what I thought.”

“That’s enough of that,” Willa chimes in, grabbing my hand and pulling me away, “I'm stealing Quincy. You boys can finish setting up while we wait for the others to arrive.”

__________________________________

A few hours later, after the rest of the group arrived, I find myself on the beach, surrounded by the three best women in my life.

Willa leans up from her towel to look at me.

“So, Quindolynn,” a cheeky grin overtakes her face, and I sigh, already knowing where this is going.

“Wanna share with the class how Josh has managed to bring out the side of you that doesn't care about PDA?”

“Yeah, if you wanna tell us how Sam has managed to break your obsession with punctuality.”

A chorus of “Oohs” sounds off from Charlotte and Melody, and I whip my head in their direction.

“Careful, there—” Willa and I say simultaneously, and we both dissolve into a fit of giggles as she motions for me to take the lead.

“I’m sure we could ask y'all something similar.”

“We absolutely could, Q,” Willa laughs, “for example, Charlotte… isn't it interesting how you took a day off work.”

“I take off work all the time,” Charlotte scoffs.

“Sure you do, Charmander,” I cut in, “but you left your phone in the car this time. No work emails.”

I can feel her eyes roll from behind her sunglasses, but she doesn't say a peep.

“And Melli,” I continue, “I’ve noticed you've not been fretting over anyone today.”

“OR trying to fight,” Willa adds.

Melody snorts a laugh.

“Well,” Melody starts, “I think we all have the same answer. Good dick!”

“Cheers to that,” Charlotte quietly responds.

“Is that how you convinced Jake to wear normal shoes, Hottie Lottie?” Willa asks through a laugh.

“Maybe, maybe not…” she responds, steepling her fingers under her chin.

The conversation lulls into a contented silence, and I turn my attention to Josh. He’s down near the water with Melody and Danny’s daughter, Iris.

I watch as she grabs his hand to get his attention.

She always has his attention when she's around. He loves that little girl. And I love how much he loves her.

Once she’s sure she has his attention, she signs something to him.

I can't quite make it out from up here, but I see Josh flash her a toothy grin before he scoops her up and runs into the lake with her.

My stomach swoops, watching as he picks her up and gently throws her into the water.

Iris’s wild giggles carry through the air as she swims the few feet back over and clings to Josh, asking him to do it again.

“QUINN!” Melody practically yells, grabbing my attention from Josh and Iris.

“Huh?”

“You were in your own little world over there,” she laughs, “been trying to get your attention for a minute.”

An embarrassed blush creeps up my neck and over my cheeks.

“Sorry, I was distracted.”

“No need to apologize. You just got your heart eyes on.”

“I suppose I do,” I laugh. “It's hard not to when I’m staring at the love of my life.”

“Mhmmmmmm, especially when they're playing with babies,” she winks at me.

She's honestly too good at reading me. I should work on that.

“HA, I hadn't even noticed.”

Melody cocks a skeptical brow at me.

“If we’re telling lies today, I still believe in the Easter Bunny. Look, babe, it's easy to get lost in your man when he’s acting like a daddy. Nothing wrong with it at all.”

I roll my eyes and scrub one hand down my face.

It’s useless to deny it.

“It’s unnecessarily hot, seeing him play with babies.”

“Amen,” Charlotte pipes up, lowering the book she’s been reading, “I've had to distract myself every time Jake picks her up.”

Willa hums in agreement.

I abruptly stand up from my towel and wipe my hands on my shorts.

“I’m gonna go hang out with them.”

“Just make sure you hand Iris off to Daniel before you start your weird PDA,” Melody laughs, “she's innocent!”

I turn and flip her off before walking down the beach.

__________________________________

Josh is standing about waist-deep in the water, holding Iris and pretending to drop her as she squirms in his arms.

Iris sees me approaching before Josh does, her face breaking out in a massive grin. She unclasps her little arms from behind Josh’s neck and flings them around wildly in a double wave.

I have to stifle a laugh as Josh fights to keep hold of the slippery child.

‘Play?’ Iris signs to me.

‘Of course!’

A wild giggle peels from her mouth before Josh finally turns around.

He visibly relaxes when our eyes meet.

I begin to walk into the lake, making grabby hands at Iris.

Josh meets me halfway and hands her over.

“I missed you, Bug,” he tucks an errant curl behind my ear before moving his hand down to pat Iris’ back.

“We’ve hardly been apart.”

“Doesn't matter, I still missed you.”

And that's fair; I miss him whether we’re apart for minutes or days.

“I missed you too, my love,” I admit, softly kissing his cheek.

He drops a hand on my lower back and gently ushers me in the direction of the towels that he had set aside for himself and Iris.

I gently drop Iris to the sand and watch her toddle to Josh.

‘Dry me?’

‘Of course, princess.’

He bends over and opens a towel for Iris, wrapping her in it and kissing her forehead.

Those pesky thoughts from this morning return, and I imagine Josh doing the same to our kid one day.

Ow. My heart.

Still wrapped in her little towel, Iris picks up a small plastic bucket and waves it at me.

‘Sandcastles?’ I ask, putting two and two together.

Iris furiously nods and runs over to a free spot of sand.

I grab Josh’s hand, following behind her.

It’s not long before Iris has us in a little sandcastle assembly line.

She fills the buckets, Josh packs the sand and carefully places it where Iris tells him, and I use my fingers to add designs to the sand buildings.

She decided we were building a little compound for our ragtag family.

She points at each building, telling me who it belongs to so I can make personalized designs.

An elaborate bird for Willa and Sam, a skull and crossbones for Jake and Charlotte, Beautiful flowers for Danny and Melody, and stars for Me and Josh.

Iris requested a more elaborate Castle in the middle of the compound to live in.

‘You want to live alone?’

‘No, but sometimes adults need alone time.’

Josh guffawed at her response.

“She’s so little and so wise.”

I nod at him before I go back to adding designs to her castle.

__________________________________

“Food’s ready!” Jake yells from across the way.

I notice Melody and Danny walking in our direction to collect the child.

My eyes shift over to Josh, and I decide to mess with him a little bit.

“Come on, Daddy,” I say lowly, watching him swallow at the word, “let's get Iris to her real parents.”

I hand Iris over to Danny, waiting for him to walk off. I glance over to Josh, taking in the bewildered look on his face.

I love making his brain short-circuit.

“Um—” he starts, “D-daddy? You hardly ever call me that.”

“Well, I've never wanted to make you one as badly as I do now.”

“M-ake me one?”

“Yes, Josh.”

He turns around, eyes darting around the group.

“Right now?” He grabs my hand.

“Why don't we start when we get home?” I laugh.

“But we could practice now; make sure we know what we’re doing!” he begins dragging me toward the parking lot.

“Are we really about to go fuck in your car like teenagers? You can't wait till we leave?” I jokingly chided him.

“Yes and no,” he drags me a little bit quicker, “I have needed you all day. And I refuse to wait any longer.”

“But—”

He turns around and catches me off guard with a kiss that leaves me wanting more, and I know that I’m going to let him get his way.

I always do…

The Caravel Tavern Series | Masterlist

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[whumpsday]

(Okay I kinda feel like I'm spamming you but I wanna pet Kane again so I'll indulge myself once more... and then I'll stop. For a while.

Also you said blood pack but I gave him a plastic bottle.. like a water bottle that I put blood in. And you said he ripped it open so I'm gonna take the misunderstanding and run with it)

I come back again a few days later and I'm again wearing an extra flannel around my waist. It's the same one from the first time, now thoroughly washed and repaired if/where needed. I tell him to give me my flannel back and give him the other one back. Then I ask for the bottle back. If he tries to explain/beg/apologize I tell him to shut the fuck up. When he shows me the torn up bottle, I sigh frustratedly. "I was gonna keep refilling that for you, but if you're so ungrateful as to fucking destroy it... the flannels I get, that's not your fault, but.. really? Dude, come on. Maybe you don't deserve the flannels either..." I don't mean the last part but I think the panic in his face is fun.. if he tries to beg I tell him to shut up though. Regardless, I sit down, and say "come here". I sit with his head in my lap and I stroke his hair. I tell him off for being tense and hold my wrist in front of his face. "If I let you drink, will you be able to relax?"

prev

Kane gives you the flannel without begging this time. You have earned his trust, and he looks at you in total adoration, openly excited for your visit. It's the only joy he has in his life. He even smiles as he greets you: a small one, but it's the first time anyone here has seen him do that. He looks a better than he did the last time you saw him, several wounds having healed much faster than normal. He hands you a bottle that's been clawed open and licked clean.

When you immediately berate him and threaten to take away any future food and clothing, the smile vanishes from his face, all that hope and joy and trust dying in an instant. He stumbles over himself to apologize, going right to begging for another chance, but stops when you tell him to. At that point, all he can do is keel over and quietly sob.

Kane isn't as tense this time, when you make him lay in your lap. He isn't as hungry. He knows that won't last. He's already starving again, just not enough that he needs extreme effort to control himself. He can't stop crying, his body wracked with sobs.

But you offer your blood to him again after all, your threat a bluff in the end. He doesn't dare speak, terrified of angering you again, nodding profusely. As he gratefully drinks, he almost doesn't care if you take his clothing away. Almost.

(you're not spamming me! but i prefer to do anything more than like 2 or 3 rp-asks in dms, so please dm me! i'm having a great time with this and would love to hear from you, 💜!)

[sky-the-trans-guy00]

Her PR Guy- Ch.2

Y/N’s POV

It had been about a month since I started working for Gotham, and I was already loving every second of it. The players were among the nicest people I had worked with, but there was just one problem— I was self-sabotaging and avoiding a certain blonde midfielder who was exactly my type.

I was hardly able to function in Kristie’s presence without turning into a gay mess, so I had been avoiding her and not acknowledging my feelings. I knew what I was doing wasn’t healthy, so I decided to speak with my therapist, Celesta, about it.

***

As I sat in the waiting room of Celesta’s office, I noticed that the ESPN body issue had come out and was sitting on one of the side tables by the couches. Before I could gather the courage to see if a certain blonde midfielder was featured in the issue, Celesta came out to greet me and then escorted me to her office.

“So, Y/N, how have you been coping with your move to New York?”

“I’ve been doing pretty well, but I wanted to talk to you about something regarding work…”

“Go right ahead!”

“I’m attracted to one of the players I work with, and although I’m pretty sure the feeling is mutual, I have found myself avoiding her”

“Why do you think that is (Y/N)?”

“I think it’s because she’s out of my league and I don’t want to embarrass myself while talking to her. Also I don’t know why she would want to date someone like me when she can have her pick out of pretty much every queer person who’s single in the NWSL?”

“It sounds like you’re experiencing some imposter syndrome, but I’d challenge you to be nicer to yourself, and to stop with the negative self-talk. If you tell yourself something enough times, you’ll end up believing it.”

“Yeah, but how do I fix it and stop self-sabotaging?”

“I’d suggest coming up with an affirmation to say to yourself when you’re struggling; I think it would really help”

“I’ll be sure to try that from now on. Thanks Celesta!.”

***

The next morning, I decided to grab brunch at a local LGBTQ+ hangout with my best friend Danny. I didn’t know what to wear, so Danny came over early to help me pick out an outfit that would be fitting for my debut into the queer community of NYC.

I was dressed in a classic blue flannel, dark wash jeans, and a pair of chukka boots, and I could tell that there were plenty of eyes on me. Once we were seated by the host, our waitress came over and introduced herself.

“Hi, my name is Sammi, and I’ll be your waitress this morning! What can I get started for you boys?”

“I’ll take a mimosa,” said Danny.

“And I’ll have a strawberry banana smoothie, please,” I said.

“For sure, handsome,” Sammi replied, I’ll have your drinks out for you shortly,” said Sammi.

***

“She was super friendly and totally your type! You should definitely ask her for her number (Y/N/N)!”

“Oh shit…she was flirting with me, wasn’t she?” 

“I mean, yeah, it was pretty obvious…”

“Goddamn! I can’t believe I didn’t pick up on that,” I groaned in frustration. 

Sammi came back with our drinks, and asked, “Are you guys ready to order?”

“Yes,” said Danny, “I’ll have the buckwheat pancakes with a side of bacon”

“And what about you, cutie?” 

“I’ll umm… take the the Eggs Benedict with extra hollandaise sauce.”

“Coming right up,” Sammi replied. 

After Sammi left to put in our orders, I avoided eye contact with Danny in an effort to maintain some type of self-preservation.

“She’s definitely into you!” Exclaimed Danny. 

“Maybe so, but I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship yet,” I replied. 

“When are you going to stop letting Karen control your life?” 

This wasn’t the first time someone in my circle had something to this effect. My buddy Alex had said the same thing when I was ranting about my huge crush on Kristie. 

“Fuck it, you’re right Danny!” I said, “I’ll ask for her number when she brings us the check.”

“Slay! Look at you (Y/N/N)! I’m so proud of you.”

***

Sammi came back with our food shortly after I made the decision to “shoot my shot”. 

“Here are those buckwheat pancakes with a side of bacon,” she said as she placed Danny’s plate in front of him. 

“And here is your Eggs Benedict with the extra hollandaise sauce,” Sammi said with a wink. 

As soon as Sammi left the vicinity, I started to freak out. 

“Yeah, never mind. There’s no way I can handle asking for her number, I definitely don’t have the balls for that!”

“Well, why don’t you just write your number on the extra receipt and leave it there for her to see?”

“That’s actually not a bad idea; I think I will!”

“Okay then, let’s dig in!”

***

When Sammi came to collect our plates, I was beyond stuffed. 

“I think I’m going to nap away my food coma when I get home”

“Me too, (Y/N/N)!” 

After she finished bussing our table, Sammi brought our checks out to us, and sure as heck, mine had her number on it, along with a note:

You’re super cute and I’d love to go out with you! The ball’s in your court, handsome 😊

Kristie POV

I was sitting with Ash, Ali, Midge, and Lynn at Brunch when (Y/N) came up with the topic of conversation.

“Honestly, I’m not sure how that man is still single…if I wasn’t already in a committed relationship and in love with Marley, you’d best believe I’d be making a move on him,” said Lynn, “You mentioned that you thought he was cute, Kristie— what’s the hold-up?”

“I’m not sure, honestly. I’ve been flirting with him, but I think he’s starting to avoid me,” replied Kristie.

“Well, if I were you I’d take it up a notch. Be super direct and then leave the ball in his court,” suggested Ali. 

[friendlyfood]

Patricia's Pabulum

Hello, my name is Patricia I am glad you came across my blog I hope you find it helpful! Whether its what you eat or how you eat hope this serves you as you find out my day-to-day intake is perfect most of ours isn't I tend to choose filling and easy meals to make and I hope you find peace in what your relationship with food is and how like any relationship with time and effort it can improve!

Day 1 yum yum sandwich in tum

It started great until the hunger kicks in! What to eat what to snack on well you can say I may have just settled, btw don't judge someday I have 2 meals some days I have 1, and others I have 3...

First meal or drink, it has been a struggle with staying away from sugar I'm not going to lie to myself or you. For days one two, and three I started my day with my new favorite caffeinated home beverage, a shot of espresso from my Keurig, then add cherry syrup and a splash of chocolate syrup blend with a small electric wand and enjoy it. For me, this is a way of caffeine outwearying the sugar knowing it gives me the boost I need then working or walking the sugar off. Now I know and am sorry for not the complete amounts as I put less than a teaspoon of each cherry and chocolate in the espresso it is estimated to be between 15-17 grams of sugar. After the caffeine wears down I needed nutrition I decided my lunch was going to easy a BLT with some water (Photo from stock photos),

Dinner was the same I wasn't as hungry and made half a BLT

want to make one that looks like this delish! Here's how

Ingredients

1. Use White, Wheat, or Sourdough bread (I find Daves Killer smart 70 cal slices to be best in flavor and taste)

2. Cook Bacon, I put my in the air fryer for 14 minutes at 360 flipping halfway through comes out perfectly crisp but if you prefer you can back or cook it on the stovetop for a quicker method

3. Cut smaller circles of tomatoes and set aside

4. Make mayo sauce by combining mayo, salt pepper oil, then I add the lettuce, add some to the top and bottom of the bread

5. Lastly assemble, bread (toast or untoasted I like untoasted so bacon is the main crisp), and mayo mix on top and bottom of the bread add lettuce, tomatoes, bacon cut in half, and enjoy

* Calorie link below is an estimated based nutrient value depending on how much of each ingredient is used*

BLT Nutrient facts

, lots of protein 12 grams for one sandwich with 4 slices of bacon

breakfast drink 120 calories and 10 grams of sugar

*note original photo that was in my blog was not available but you now get an idea how crispy I like my bacon :)*

Day 2

Day number lucky two, I partook in the same drink as before the chocolate-cherry espresso if you would like to make please refer to say one! Promise its the best

For day two no breakfast as most of my days I skip and let the caffeine do the work of getting me up, throughout the afternoon I had 2 glasses of water and a granola bar from trader joes called ABC bars are delicious chocolate oat bars with almond butter in the middle

My hungry started to kick off after the granola stopped making me fill full around 4, I had a friend coming over 5 so we decided to make my frozen Chinese food from trader joes which was easy and dinner was less than 15 minutes plus I was happy cause I only needed three ingredients trader joes Kung pow chicken sauce that comes with it and oil to cook the chicken (optional soy sauce), for 5.99 and more healthy for going out plus it kept me full from all the protein!

nutrient value, 16 grams of sugar per serving, 20 grams of fat high in protein about 48 grams per 2 cups

gif from wix gif finder

Day 3

Did someone say Pizza?

Me knowing it was going to be the last day of my caffeine starter I was struggling so I decided to use the same amounts of add-in with my coffee but with an extra shot. Boy did I regret that it made me more anxious than it did refresh and caffeinated after about two hours of ingesting coffee my stomach was talking to me! I decided protein was the best option I got a power crunch bar which is the best! 13-15 Grams of protein was the best decision for me after the protein and fiber started to wear off it was best to drink some water. For me the day was similar to day 2 with me knowing I'd have a friend come over at 4 the hunger started to kick in and at 5 I knew he would be over, there was a mutual decision pizza was the only option! But with a twist, we were going to make it to my house I had frozen pizza crust with no nutrition just mainly calories made with homemade sauce with tomatoes, onion, basil, and seasoning, and we had cheese and pepperoni from frys.

Now as much as I love to give exacts this one also varies in calories, fiber, and protein but what I can give you are the protein bar recommendation and nutritional information

(Please see blue bubble for info and where you can buy power crunch bars )

Now if you want to make homemade pizza here's how and a recommendation of what to get

Ingredients

crust, pizza, sauce, cheese, topping of choosing

Get out the pizza crust (use premade or make your own ) and set the oven to 375

Add Yummy sauce (Recommend organic pizza sauce from Safeway) make your own or buy

Add cheese and toppings

Bake anywhere from 12-14 minutes

Cut and enjoy!

Pizza provided by wix gif finder

Day 4

Grump Times til dawn

What can I say no caffeine = no happy me

I did this to myself knowing I challenged myself and had a hard time getting my day started without caffeine I started my day with a big glass of water I could feel my grumpiness come on. Throughout the afternoon grumpiness kicked on and I fed it water I wasn't going to let it get the best of me. I distracted myself from eating by doing errands getting gas, getting dog food, and finally going to the car wash finally my stomach had had enough of the games, and by 4 pm she was ready to eat I thought since I played it safe in the morning I should play it safe in the afternoon. Checked in the fridge to see what I had and decided on the bag of elote salad from trader joes with a chicken breast on top.Best choice my stomach didn't fill sick or stuffed

Here is the link to buy it and with the nutritional facts me adding a chicken breast just added protein (43g)and nothing else.

gif from wix gif finder

Day 5

The final stretch

Day 5 was the best and easiest day to prep and make, my favorite meal as well! I decided it was the day to do an instapot meal I prepped gluten-free made noodles made with brown rice flour put them in the fridge then got started on the sauce.The sauce I made and might I say perfected is less than 5 ingredients,

, ground beef, tomatoes blended with basil/ garlic and seasoning if wanted add spinach in for iron and vitamin k, and c

Steps to make the sauce

1. Brown the ground beef and add to instapot

2. Add in ground tomatoes and stir together both tomatoes, seasoning and beef

3. Set instapot to slow cooker and let it do its thing

4. Add sauce to noodles and ENJOY

Added from WIX gif finder

[jaebirde-unused]

So i think i might be autistic and/or ADHD

I've been scrolling through Pinterest rn, one thing led to another, and now i'm looking at posts from various social media sites about what ADHD people deal with that aren't talked about as much and I'm just like...this is literally me? I deal with pretty much all of these things, and I'm starting to think I should get myself tested for both?

Because so far some things I've seen listed are:

the things I say vs the things i mean vs what people hear (ex. what i say: "it would be nice to be able to do something i'm naturally good at" vs what i mean: "it's too draining to do something for 8 hrs a day doing only things that I can't do well and everyone else can do them so much better and not being able to do what can actually DO" vs what they hear: I want everything I do to come easy and to put zero effort into what I do")

getting frustrated that I can't do something the way i want to

getting overstimulated and not knowing what to do with myself

the bliss of wearing noise cancelling (or at least semi-noise cancelling) headphones, but then that overwhelming feeling when you take them off and every fucking noise in existence assaults your ears at once. (also relates to prev point)

finding an interest that either grabs hold of you and NEVER LETS GO or having one that lasts for 1 day to 6 weeks before it's gone forever

it takes forever to fall asleep and i often find myself staying up an extra 3-5 hrs after "going to bed" because my brain won't let me fucking sleep.

CONSTANTLY FORGETTING THINGS (this one is so annoying because it makes me seem like I wasn't paying attention even when i was trying to and i feel so guilty that i forgot the thing that i don't think i fully processed)

people asking me why i didn't ask for help and me not knowing how to explain that my brain is in constant "i don't know what the fuck is happening!" and "i can handle this myself!" and "i'm so stupid why can't i do this on my own?"

grabbing my headphones, finding my favorite playlist, and not pressing play for 2+ hrs OR starting to listen to my music, pausing to read/do something, and not turning it back on for 2+ hrs

my internal clock makes NO SENSE. I'll think it's been 2 hrs but it's only been 3 mins, or i'll think i've been doing something for only 5 mins when it's been 6 hours and i have other shit to do

✨procrastination✨

seriously i cannot for the life of me focus on anything

i'll try and i'll just start drawing or scrolling through my phone even though i know i have things to do but my brain won't. let. me. DO IT.

getting overwhelmed with way to many choices and freaking out

building things that i need to do up in my head and putting it off for a month and then i do it and it's like. half an hour

Can't pay attention to something because there's Too Much Noise™ or because it's too quiet

What do you mean not everyone can hear their lights and refrigerators running?

Forgetting everything. forgetting that assignment, forgetting to make that phone call, forgetting to eat, forgetting to clean, forgetting literally all of your plans for the day

more that i can't think of right now but might add later

...and so forth. But like, I thought I was the only one who dealt with this? But I'm not? And for some reason I'm crying over the fact that I'm not the only one who deals with this? 'Cause this is news to me. I had honestly thought i was just Different™ and that I was weird for having these reactions to things

[mylifemydiary]

It’s the Unsolicited Advice for Me.

12/8/22

His feet are clammy.  Put some socks on him.  When was the last time you changed him?  His gums are itchy.  He’s hungry, make him a bottle.  He has a rash, why don’t you put diaper cream?  When was the last time he ate?  He looks sleepy.  

All of this usually within an hour.  It’s overwhelming.  I am usually one step behind all of these things because I’m too busy loading the washer, or unloading the dishwasher, or pumping, or washing bottles and pump parts, or yelling at my toddler, or cleaning up a mess he made, but always about to do whatever it is I’m being ‘told’ to do and it drives me up the wall. 

Last week my husband had his vasectomy.  We are both now officially sterile.  I took this week off of work because I wasn’t sure how hard his recovery was going to be on him, and coincidentally the flu has been ravaging the gym where I work.  So not only did I not go to work, I didn’t go to work out because I would have had to take the kids, and the only one in this house who hasn’t had the flu shot is the baby who cannot get it until 6 months.  He’s 5.  So I didn’t want to risk it and we have stayed home.  Well my husband felt well enough to go to work yesterday so he did, and came home sick.  I am so disappointed that all my efforts all week have pretty much been for nothing.  I have to go back to work next week and there is nobody to cover my shift, literally one person quit and one got fired this week and two others were out with the flu, not to mention my boss’s last day is tomorrow.  The schedule has never looked so slim.  Oh I take that back, it looked like this in May when I was working 6 days a week.  I bought some lysol to spray everything down and made him wear a mask to feed the baby last night, but throughout the day the germs have been spread and I’m sure resistance is futile now.  And my toddler drank out of his dad’s cup even after I specifically said not to, and then later had the baby’s hands in HIS mouth which will then end up in the baby’s mouth so we are pretty much fucked at this point.  Which just makes me feel so defeated.  I might as well have gotten my workouts in, seeing as how I still hate my body and can’t seem to get any momentum going on my workouts like I want.  I was starting to go 4 times a week and was happy with that but then this week came along and wrecked it.  I originally had planned to keep working out this week but I don’t want to risk the flu.  I don’t think my husband has the flu, but any bugs are not good bugs right now.  

I started my day with disappointment.  I was taking an exam to be an online rater, and after downloading and printing a 166 page manual and during which having to buy toner, then splitting the test up into several parts so that I could complete it, got back a result within minutes that I had failed.  It doesn’t tell you by how many or what they were looking for in a result, just that I had failed.  I was hoping to get that job so that I could make some extra money on the side for my credit card bills, but now that will not happen.  It’s just disheartening because I was so sure I would pass.  I know it’s not meant to be.  That’s probably for the best because I barely have time to hear myself think during the day, let alone do a whole job.  I wish I had a plan b but so far the only thing that comes up is online surveys, which I would have to do massive amounts of just to get like twenty bucks.  

[theflowerofthecommonwealth]

Female companions (+ Ellie) reacting to an F!Sole asking them to help manage her long hair (cutting it or helping to put it in a braid, bun, etc. — your choice)?

This one is so incredibly sweet and a perfect one for me to write!!! 💞💞💞 As someone with longer hair, I find it very relaxing when my hair gets done by someone else. I hope you don’t mind, but I ended up adding the boys as well. Just couldn't help myself, it was too cute to pass up!!!

Sole had always taken great pride and care for her extremely long and luscious hair. After the bombs fell, she decided against chopping it short wasteland style. Instead she chose to wear it proudly, coming up with alternate ways to keep it out of her way while working or in combat. After a long day out in the Commonwealth, Sole fluffed up the now jungle of her hair with a frown. She turned to her companion and asked for their help in getting it back under control.

The Girls:

Piper Wright: Goes over the moon with excitement. She’s helped Nat with her hair hundreds of times and has been dying to touch Soles extravagantly long hair. Piper is very coordinated when brushing out Soles hair, knowing all the tricks to get out any stubborn knots by alternating between a comb and her fingers. They both agree to put up Soles hair in a swirled half bun with a lovely little bow, letting the rest flow charmingly over her shoulders.

Curie: Very enthusiastic about helping Sole, although she doesn’t have much experience as her own hair is cut very short. She is very delicate in her work, taking extra time to properly moisturize and brush out Soles beautiful hair in sections. Her touch is so light and feathery that Sole barely feels her working from behind. Curies final French braids are a little messy and uneven in some areas, but it adds a little extra appeal to the whole hairstyle.

Cait: Ask if Sole is absolutely sure that she wants her to be doing her hair, as Cait isn’t really an expert on any kind of hair care. Her own Mother wasn’t all that careful when brushing her younger self's hair, often being overly rough and grumbly to get it over with. That poor mistreatment had left small bald patches in her hair, partly why she doesn’t put much effort into it. Despite that, she is very gentle in pulling the comb through Soles long hair. With lots of guidance, Cait is able to do it into a messy high bun running into little to no trouble. (Other than the fact that her finger somehow got tied in there at one point)

Ellie Perkins: Also flies over the moon with excitement and practically shoves Sole into her office chair so they can begin right away. She herself takes great pride in maintaining her own head of hair, so she is more than happy to give Soles rare kept locks such treatment. Ellie beautifully brushes and sculpts her hair into an elegant swirl on top of her head, finishing it off with a shinning star pin. Once she is done, Ellie hopes that Sole will return the favor by helping her with her own hair that sometimes goes out of wack.

Da Bois: (That’s how I’m spelling it, you can’t stop me)

Nick Valentine: Smiles warmly at Sole, gladly accepting the request. He already has experience with helping Ellie do her hair and memories of the old Nick watching Jenny practice doing her hairstyle for their wedding. First he makes sure that his exposed metal hand is covered by a glove so there isn’t a chance that her hair gets caught in it. (Would be a huge pain to untangle) Once they both are settled, Nick brushes then diligently works Soles hair into a graceful braided bun. He even brings out a flowered hairpin that he kept stored in his desk, gifting it to Sole to use in her new style.

Codsworth: More than happy to help Sole with managing her long hair, stating that it’s a nightmare whenever he gets a look at unkempt hair. Codsworth first trims off the dead ends and gives her a full spa hair wash, insisting that it’s necessary to give such a rare sight a fine treatment. He then moisturizes and wraps Soles hair into delicate curls like the prewar women often did, finishing it off with a ribbon headband. The poor sweet Mr Handy gets a little emotional at the end result, saying she reminds him of the more simpler times before the war.

Preston Garvey: He has helped other settlers and fellow Minutemen manage their longer hair, but this was Sole, his General and close friend who took great pride in maintaining her hair. He is shaky during the first part of brushing, constantly asking if he’s pulling anything too hard or if he is straining her neck. After Sole assured him it’s alright and he gets a little more comfortable and relaxed. Preston finds the gesture to be more relaxing. He settles on doing Soles hair into twin braids, nothing overly fancy but still sweet and charming.

Deacon: Dude grins a smile bigger than his confidence at Soles asking. He immediately has her sit in a chair away from any mirrors or reflections, saying that the final product will be a “surprise” and she must not peek. (Oh no) Sole just has to sit there will Deacon gently brushes her hair and occasionally snickers from behind her. She can feel that he is piling up her hair on top of her head, He finally brings out a handle held mirror, telling Sole to “behold” his creation. She looks into the mirror and bursts into hysterical laughter, her hair now up into a hornets nest complete with little paper hornets sitting around it.

Danse: Gets a bit of a lost puppy face when Sole asks for his help, but he accepts nonetheless. His entire face reads, I-don’t-know-what-I’m-doing-send-help-plz for the entire duration of the brushing period. The fear of pulling too hard or getting the comb tangled in Soles beautiful hair is a threatening presence over his head and he wants to avoid that at all cost. So every move he makes with his hands for the comb is delicate and perfectly planned. He swoops it up into the standard military bun, a little disappointed he couldn’t do something different for her. But Sole is still delighted and she thanks him so genuinely that it puts him at ease.

Hancock: He shrugs and snatches a brush, claiming that he will give it his best shot. Hancock hasn’t had to deal with hair for a long time, but he hasn’t forgotten how painful it is when tugged on too harshly. So he keeps his strokes on Soles hair light and slow with constant questioning if she is still with him and if he isn’t pulling Soles brains out. Twin ponytails is what he ends up doing after much debate, draping them over Soles shoulders before stepping back to admire his good work. Not gonna be great in combat, but for now she can enjoy the lovely look and feel of it.

MacCready: He is quick to jump aboard, having helped Lucy with her own hair so he knows what to do and what not to do. Not that he isn’t a little nervous, it’s been awhile so it does take a moment for him to remember how it goes. The trick of pinching sections of the hair while brushing comes back first, followed by everything else. MacCready brushes and gathers all of Soles hair into a high ponytail, making sure the rubber band isn’t squeezing the life out of her roots before securing it. The ponytail ends up being a little lopsided and it bothers him enough that he redoes it completely despite Sole insisting it was alright.

X6: Recoils a bit at Soles request, pushing back all facial emotions of shock. He’s a courser and a trained killer, not a barber. So why would she want or trust him to do her hair that she valued so deeply? After Soles insistence, he reluctantly agrees and picks up a brush. X6 has no idea what to exactly do or how to even start, but he catches on pretty quick just from memory of Sole doing her hair. He decides that a military bun would be the best style tactically and he achieves it almost flawlessly with a few loose flyaways. Although, Sole would look pretty nice with all her long silky hair down…

Strong: Stares Sole down for a long while with much thought on his face. Then factually tells her to rip it all off so it doesn’t get in her way in battle ever again. He's even nice enough to throw down a bloodied machete for her to use for this occasion. (Please don’t ask Strong for beauty advice)

Dogmeat: Borks happily and buried his wet nose in Soles hair, doing his best to flair it up into something nice for his favorite human. (My boy is really trying, give him credit)

Moral Of The Story: Long hair would be a nightmare in the post war Commonwealth, literally. You’d probably be walking around looking like Medusa 75% of the time, scaring everything in your path.

[celinegabor]

Developing Your Look.

One of the most interesting things about living, in my opinion, is that we are constantly undergoing changes. And often, those changes can be seen on the outside in how we present ourselves to the world.

The other side of that coin however is that sometimes how we present on the outside gets stuck. That transition into a new state of being can be hard especially when we’re unable to see the ways in which we’ve become stuck and so I’m here to help you understand how to develop the outside to match your inside!

Firstly, you need to understand that trends, styles, and signatures are not one in the same.

Trends come and go like the moon. They follow cycles that have been studied. Style and styling is an art. I like to think of styling as the finished painting after all the ground work has been laid. Signatures are you. They are unique to you and what you love. Your signatures can be styled and they can even become trends BUT there will always be elements of your signature present in your look no matter what trend or method of styling is currently popular.

The true test that comes with developing your own look is that YOU are ready to be open minded and are willing to flow wherever your creative inner self takes you. Fashion is indeed personal. It’s historical. It speaks to changes that are happening in REAL time. Are you bold enough to answer the call?

Ground Zero: Building your base…

Chances are you, like many others, have had your inner creative stifled due to social media trends. Meaning - you view the world in aesthetics rather than as individual moving and breathing things and therefore your ability to style and think outside of the box has been hindered and dampened. No worries, you can get it back.

Go into your closet, your drawers, under your bed (mmhmm, clean it out) and pull pieces you adore. Then look at what remains. Think about why you bought those items - what was your intent? Now look at the pieces you love, how many of them are years old? Why do you like them?

Think about your clothing in terms of artistry. Your clothes are not a means to an end - they are an expression of where you are. Do you know where you are? What direction are you headed in based upon your clothing?

Effort can not be evaded…

The pandemic has been very hard for so many of us. A lot of us (including myself at times) have given up. So much feels lifeless including our clothing…

Well that will need to end today. Creativity is a muscle. The more you use it - the sharper it becomes. The more outstretched it becomes. It’s time to put in some effort. I want you to wear your clothes like you’re putting together a look book and while you’re at it go ahead and document everything you wear with a photo or two or seven.

Study yourself and study your sense of style. Do this for 30 days. What pieces, ideas, styles reappear in your photos? Those are your signatures…

Flex your creative muscle and you may also find yourself having a little extra pep in your step as well.

Build, Discard, Build…

Now that you understand you (your canvas) - it’s time to get rid of things we do not like. Could we have thrown things away in the beginning? Yes. However, doing so at the beginning doesn’t allow us enough time to use what we have. Donate what you’ve not touched and please be sure it is clean and in good condition before doing so.

Next, lay out all of your photos you used to document your style like you’re a fashion editor. Pull what inspires you. Pull what makes your heart jump. Then create two versions of everything you’re wearing & be sure to include your signatures. Day, Night.

For example, if I love my little black dress and a certain heel. I’m going to create a day version of that so that I can wear it out. It may require elevating or adding a piece of clothing here or there but NOW you’re working with your silhouette. You know exactly how things should fit and look. It’s easier now. Go shop!

Shop with your mind, style with your heart…

Are you cheap? Are you easy to get rid of? No and no. Pick your clothes the same way. Deals and steals are wonderful and a blast to find when out with friends - but quality matters more. What makes more sense buying one shirt for $60 that lasts for 6 years vs. a $10 shirt that frays after three wears. This is not an excuse to use your last $60. Be smart. Fibers. vs. fabrics people.

Fibers are RAW. Fiber makes the fabric. Things like cotton, or silk are fibers.

Fabrics describe how the fibers are put together.

Example: Cotton chiffon. Cotton are the fibers that make up the chiffon. Meaning a garment like this would wash well and keep us cool.

This is critical to understand when shopping because it speaks to the quality and durability of a garment.

Avoid plastics like polyester when you can, the hold sweat, they stain, and it’s uncomfortable. Stick to quality fabrics that hold over time. Pay attention to washing instructions and follow accordingly.

This includes lingerie. Please stop throwing it in the washer and dryer. Hand wash. Air dry.

Finally, you’re worth it…

You’re worth getting to know. You’re worth spending the extra time on yourself in the morning. You’re worth the $60 shirt. You’re worth the $5,000 dress. YOUR BEING is WORTHY of EXPRESSION right now as you are.

The world is your runway. Go work it.

XO Celine.

A small list of my favorite stores…

Alice + Olivia: [www.aliceandolivia.com]

Roberto Cavali: [www.robertocavalli.com]

KSUBI: [www.ksubi.com]

PISTOLA: [www.pistoladenim.com]

L’AGENCE: [www.lagence.com]

AREA NYC: [area.nyc] - Accessories

RAG-BONE: [rag-bone.com]

OBJECT-RARE: [objectrare.com]

FRAME: [frame-store.com]

[buckyownsmylife]

Walk Away - Tom Hardy smut

The one where Tom is your mentor and really shouldn’t feel this attracted to you.

Warnings: smut, age gap, famous!reader, mentor!Tom Hardy, breeding kink, risky sex, tiny insinuation of a size kink, (blink and you’ll miss), mention of a panic attack with barely any descriptions of it

Word count: 3k>

Tom’s P.O.V.

“Tom.” I stopped rubbing the sleep off my eyes the second my name fell from her lips. I didn’t need her to identify herself - I didn’t need to check the caller’s ID. I’d recognize her voice anywhere, regardless of just how groggy I was. But the tone in which she said my name, the tired, dead feeling shining through it, was what really startled me awake. “Tom, I need you.”

The desperation in her voice scared me, and I was out of bed before I could even realize what I was doing. “You’re home?” I confirmed, waiting only for the expected answer while I looked for my keys. “I’ll be there in five. Hang on tight.”

The night was cold, but I don’t think I would have noticed it if it wasn’t for the chill that had me freezing from the inside. I didn’t even consider changing out of my sleepwear - sweatpants and a loose shirt - mostly because I didn’t want to waste time on something so trivial, especially since it wasn’t that different from what I’d normally wear around her.

I’d known her for over four years now. I’d never witnessed this level of distress on her. In fact, she was never anything short of enthusiastic and happy, a bubble of sunshine that managed to energize everyone around her. For her to be this way, something big had to have happened, and it pained me to imagine just what could have been. 

It pained me to imagine her suffering, and not being there to help. So I stepped on the pedal, driving madly, knowing my own heartbeat would only get back to a regular pace once I had her in my arms again, could smell her perfume as I buried my face in her hair.

She wasn’t by the door when I got to her house, so I let myself in with the extra key that I had, noticing all the lights were off. There was only one place she could be. 

My feet took me there without even having to think about it, like there was some sort of instinctive calling from her body to mine. When I got to her bedroom, a dim light showed just how effective that connection was, as I pushed in to find her laying on her bed, waiting for me.

“What happened?” She sat up when I pushed the door open, quietly closing it behind me, and for a second there was no reaction as she took in my presence, like she needed time to realize I really was there. But then her eyes glistened, denouncing a flow of tears, and she just shook her head, as if asking me to contain my curiosity for just a bit.

“Can you just hug me?” She asked, and I felt my heart squeeze at the realization of just how unaware she was of my feelings for her. I’d do anything, anything for the woman in front of me. A hug was nothing, and I ached to have her in my arms anyway.

I sat by her side and immediately, she was on me, climbing on my lap until she could hide her face on the crook of my neck, and I froze only momentarily before wrapping my arms around her smaller body. Despite how wrong it morally felt - particularly when I remembered I wasn’t wearing any type of underwear - I couldn’t deny how right it was to both my heart and my body, how much it comforted me to feel her this close.

So there we stayed, for God knows how long. We didn’t speak - I was waiting for her decision to explain what had happened, and she clearly needed to come to terms with whatever it was. Just being there for her was enough for me, so I kept rubbing her back, eventually pulling away to press kisses on her temple, trying to ignore how her little sighs of comfort made me feel.

“I-I think I’m ready to talk.” The second I couldn’t feel her warm breath against my neck anymore, I felt cold again, but to my surprise, she didn’t climb down my lap, didn’t try to put some space between us. 

Instead, her arms remained around my shoulders, fingers playing with the collar of my shirt, making me shiver every once in a while when her nails dragged along my flesh.

“Okay,” I encouraged, only because she seemed nervous to say whatever it was that she wanted to tell me, her eyes avoiding mine before she finally managed to meet my gaze again, after taking a deep breath.

“Shawn broke up with me.” A sharp inhale resonated throughout the room, and it took me a few seconds to figure out it had been my own doing. I’d never liked her boyfriend, not ever since she first told me they had been going out, and despite how hard I tried to hide it from her, she had always been aware of my true feelings for him. 

Knowing he was the one to blame for her current state of mind only served to turn my concern into anger. 

“Why?” That was the only thing I could think to ask, the only thing I could focus on as I struggled not to throw her on the bed and run out after him. But I’d never be able to leave her alone, especially not since she was so clearly vulnerable.

There was another second of hesitation before she finally revealed, “It was because of you, actually.” Now that froze me into a state of shock. I couldn't speak, couldn’t think, all I could do was stare down at the face of the woman I loved who looked like she hadn’t just dropped a bomb on me.

“What?” Her giggle made my heart skip a beat for a second. It felt good to know that she was already starting to feel better, it felt even greater to know that I was the reason for her laughter, even if I was still fucking confused.

“Don’t worry about it.” Now that just wasn’t good enough. I needed to know, needed to understand. How had I been the cause for their break-up? But she didn’t seem too eager to open up about this specific part of her day, and so I decided to break out the big guns.

I laid her down on the bed, hovering over her so our eyes remained connected. “Tell me,” I quietly begged, and although she still looked anxious, I knew she was close to breaking. “I really want to know.”

She sighed, eyes closing for only an instant and for that instant, I allowed myself to believe that she was breathing me in, appreciating the feeling of being covered by my much larger body, exactly like I did.

“He was jealous,” she finally admitted, but the frown in my face only deepened, asking her for more information. “He felt like I prefered your company over his, which to be fair, it’s the truth. When I’m with you, I never want to leave.”

I didn’t know what to say. So I just stood there, frozen, looking deep into her eyes, searching for any sign of mockery, but found none. She looked hurt, but not like she regretted what happened. It just looked like she needed me there.

And so I stayed. I laid down by her side on the bed and pulled her to me, so her head rested on my chest, and I thought. I thought long and hard about what she’d told me and about how I felt. I thought so much, in fact, that I could see a panic attack forming, as the weight of my feelings threatened to suffocate me, and before I could realize what I was doing, I was already sitting up on the bed and looking for my keys.

“Where are you going?” She rubbed the sleep off her eyes as she tried to understand what was happening, but to be quite honest, I didn’t understand it myself. I just knew I needed to get the hell out of there, or I would end up saying something I’d regret. “I’m so comfy, can’t you just stay?”

It was so hard to breathe that my chest heaved with the labour of getting each breath in and out, so I forced myself to focus on it, stopping only for a few seconds, but it was enough to have me spilling things I’d been managing to hide for years.

“Don’t ask me that. Please.” My voice sounded hoarse, like I hadn’t used it in too long. “Because I’ll stay, and it’ll only hurt me further.” That caught her attention, wiping any remnants of sleep from her in an instant. 

“I wish I could walk away from you. Time and time again I wished for it, when you began dating that jerk, when I first realized I had feelings for you… but I just can’t. I’d do anything for you. All I can think about is you, all the fucking time. I want you so fucking much. I love you way too much. And being just your friend, your mentor, your confidant, is killing me.”

I closed my eyes to catch my breath, trying to focus, trying to make anything make sense again. In that time, I feared the worst. I thought about her leaving, her hand leaving a warm imprint on my face as she slapped me. I thought about her (rightfully, in my mind) accusing me of betraying her, calling me a monster, a pervert. 

I thought I had imagined every possible scenario, but I was still surprised when I opened my eyes to find her seating on the edge of her bed, gaze resting on mine, licking her lips. “I wanna feel you,” she said, and my mind swirled with this unexpected outcome.

“Excuse me?” I scrambled to keep myself up, finding a hold in the back of a nearby chair, my entire body trembling with the effort to hold back, the effort to think and listen, instead of just doing what my instincts begged me to do - pounce on her and fuck her raw.

“I want you inside of me,” she calmly stated, like it was no big deal. It was clear that it was the best way she had found to ask me for what she wanted, but I just couldn’t believe it.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Y-you want me?” I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, understanding the delicate nature of this situation, anxious to not let it slip through my fingers nor hold it so tightly it would end up breaking and hurting me in the process. 

I closed the gap between us, getting out of the bed to come stand in front of him, hoping the proximity would ease him the same way having his body near would calm me.

“I’ve always wanted you,” I confirmed, hoping he’d see just how truthful the statement was, needing him to see how much more I wanted to say. “But right now…” Without thinking, my hand reached out to fiddle with the edge of his shirt, the sight of the boner struggling against his sweatpants unmistakable to me. “Right now, I’ll do anything if you just touch me.” 

A sharp exhale of breath, his warmth hit my face, giving me a taste of what was to come. But I wanted the real thing. I wanted to know how it felt from his lips, to have his tongue forcing my mouth open, making me forget my need to breathe.

“I need you.” I got what I wanted then. His face lowered to mine, mouth finally close enough for me to reach, after what felt like years of desire. And it was everything that I’d always imagined his kiss to be - overpowering, dominating and overwhelmingly him. I was instantly addicted.

When he finally allowed our lips to part, taken by his need to breathe, I slowly began to peel away my clothes, fingers trembling in quiet desperation for him to see this for what it truly was: the meeting of desire and lust after years of denial and repression.

“Please fuck me,” I pleaded as my naked body was revealed to him inch by inch, willing to do whatever would get me what I needed. “I swear I can handle you.” That last part was added almost as an afterthought, when I watched his hand curl around a tightness I’d never witnessed in real life before.

I knew what was going through his head - the fight between what was expected of us and what we wanted, our feelings and our professions, but nothing else mattered to me more than knowing he’d spear me open with his length.

“Lay down and spread your legs for me.” Just that order was enough to have me whining low in the back of my throat, but I did as he said, even held my ankles so his view of me would be unobstructed. But that meant I had to watch him as he knelt by the bed and took a hold of my legs, licking his lips in desire at what he saw.

“Please, please, fuck me,” I repeated, knowing I wouldn’t handle his lips on me right now. I needed his thickness, his hardness, I needed to be filled by him, to feel him inside of me.

“Let me just get a taste,” he tried to convince me, eyes focused on the apex of my thighs. I almost laughed at how it looked like his mouth was watering as he stared at my exposed pussy, but my need was far too great to allow me any sort of distraction.

“Later, okay? You can eat me out as long as you want, just… later.” That had his head snapping up, gaze at last meeting mine with a soft sentiment that I knew was at least half vulnerability.

My poor Tommy. Even after all of my confessions, he still couldn’t believe that what was happening was actually real. He still doubted I would want him in the morning, as something more than what I wanted him when I called him tonight.

“Touch me, Tom,” I quietly asked, raising his hand to where I was aching for him, rubbing myself with his thumb. “Touch me right here, please, I’m begging you.”

Hearing those words fall from my lips changed something in him. Where once he was hesitant, a sudden confident smirk, almost arrogant, slowly spread over his lips, taking over his entire aura.

Tom’s P.O.V.

“So needy for me…” I whispered as I witnessed the truth behind my statement. She was sopping wet, almost dripping down the duvet, and as much as I wanted to get my mouth on her, I could accept that we’d have the time to do that later.

I loved the idea of a later.

“I’ll take care of you, darling.” I whispered as I climbed up her body once more, occupying the space between her thighs like I was always meant to be there. “Let me take care of you.”

I brushed my lips against hers, relishing in this closeness, in the moment just before it all changed. I was sure she could feel the weight of my cock against her thigh, and it was probably what prompted her to wrap her arms around my shoulders, breathlessly telling me, “Yes. Yes, please.”

Hissing as I finally slid my length inside of her, I knew I was in trouble the second I bottomed out, biting on her shoulder to keep myself from groaning and drowning out her delicious little sounds. She felt too good. No one should feel this good.

A broken gasp (or was it a moan) called my attention, taking me from my efforts of restraining myself to her, completely. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” I asked, brushing the hair away from her face as I watched her open her eyes and blink a few times, trying to keep tears from flowing down her cheeks. “Does it hurt?”

But she just shook her head, hands searching mine until she could lace our fingers together. “No,” she breathed, hips jutting up in a silent way of asking me to move. “It feels so good.”

I bit the inside of my cheek in an effort not to smile widely at her admission, finally allowing myself to slowly begin dragging my cock out of her tight channel before pushing it in again.

“It does?” I questioned, loving to hear her say it. “Well, I’ll always make you feel this good, baby. How does that sound?” She moaned out loud as I lowered my head to lave her breasts with attention, relishing in every little sound that escaped her beautiful lips as I pounded her on the bed.

“Fuck, you’re such a good girl, darling.” Another loud moan was all I got as a response, paired with her fingernails biting on the skin of my back. “My good girl, yes?” I insisted, rubbing my jaw against her neck, breathing her in.

I was drunk on her, on this entire experience, still not quite believing it was really happening. She was really here, getting fucked by me. “You’ll be my good girl? Just mine? Forever?”

A smile spread out over her lips, even as she threw her head back to moan a “Yes.” I chuckled against her chest, starting to suck little bruises here and there, wanting to see her all marked up on me, when she interrupted my plans with a breathless comment, “You talk dirty.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” I chuckled against her lips, right as she started to convulse underneath me, clinging to my back for dear life. “You haven’t seen anything yet.”

Her nails scratched me as she found her bliss, and I wasn’t too far behind. As I started to pick up my pace, really milking her orgasm while searching for mine, it was her words that brought me to my ultimate release.

“C-cum inside, I want it inside of me.” I knew she wasn’t in any form of contraception, and I also knew this wasn’t the right time for either of us to become parents, but to say the idea didn’t arouse me was a lie. 

Flashes of her young body with my baby in it had my cock twitching, the risk of getting my perfect future right then too exciting. She’d be the perfect mother, I just knew it. And the fact that she would take the chance of becoming the mother of my child right then affected me so much that even after I emptied myself inside of her, I was still hard.

Her fingers played with my curls as I rested my head between her breasts, breathing her in, trying to catch my breath. “I can’t believe I get to sleep next to you tonight,” she said, melting my heart right then and there. “I hate it when you’re away.”

I did too. But I’d never need to be again.

[dreamescapeswriting]

Clueless ~ KTH [Request]

WORD COUNT: 1.1K

PAIRING: Taehyung x Reader

GENRE: fluffy, mild angst, reading being called clingy, fluffy ending

A.N: I hope that this is okay, I went with an imagine so that it didn’t all end up the same way and it wasn’t repetitive 

After months of trying and trying for a baby, it was finally happening. You were pregnant and far along enough to tell your fiancéand his friends. The boys all knew before Taehyung because you wanted to make it a surprise for him. Deciding it would be more fun that way for him to find out after and the boys could help you throw a small party.

The plan was to tell him when you were both home alone, five minutes before the boys were supposed to be coming around but he was acting strange. Taehyung had seemed so annoyed at something all day and he wasn't telling you what was wrong. You just figured he'd woken up in a bad mood and would finally get out of it later in the day. 

"Tae?" You asked sweetly, walking into the living to find him watching something on the TV. His gaze staring at the screen as though he hadn't even heard you walk into the room. Clutching down on the box you took in a deep breath, walking over to him with a huge smile on your face. It had been one of the hardest things to hide from Taehyung and now it was finally time to show him. 

"Hi baby," You whispered in his ear, hoping that he would have brightened up a little but he just grumbled something and continued to stare at the screen. Some random historical drama was playing and you sighed a little. 

"I got you something..." You put the box onto his lap, inside was one of the cutest ways you could think of to tell him about your pregnancy.

"Not now," He grumbled pushing the box to the side as he continued to stare at the screen. 

"It's important though Tae, I want you to see it." You breathed out excitedly, still too happy to be annoyed by his mood but he stood up in a rush. 

"For fuck sake! Why are you being more clingy than usual lately? Huh?" You stared up at him in shock that he called you clingy. There was clearly something bothering him that he wasn't telling you about, 

"I didn't realise-"

"You're so fucking annoying sometimes. I just want some time to myself! Is that too much to ask for?" You got up from the sofa, brushing off the dress you were wearing and nodded over and over again. Forgetting for a moment that at any second the rest of his members were going to come through the door. 

"Tae-" You barely had time to say his name before the door burst open. 

"Y/N!" Jungkook practically screamed as he took you into his arms, smiling and hugging you tightly.

"How's my growing bean?!" He yelled out referring to the small baby growing inside of you. As you went to shake your head everyone began to congratulate Taehyung. Maybe this plan wasn't as well thought out as you thought it was.

"Hyung, I bet you're so happy." Jungkook breathed out as he walked over towards Taehyung who looked just as confused as ever. Namjoon handed you a gift bag with a giant smile on his face, 

"We all got you a little something, you can't say no to it." You sighed at him shaking your head. They had agreed to not buying you anything for the baby since you didn't know the gender yet.

"Jin, don't-"

"We have to congratulate you properly," Jin said as he walked into the house with a cake in his hands. Decorated in pink and blue icing with two candles on top, it was starting to make you feel emotional that they had gone to all of this effort. The extra hormones running around inside of you were bringing you to the brink of tears.

"What's going on?" Taehyung questioned as he finally realised that the boys were clearly congratulating him for a reason. Jimin stared at you and then to the unopened box beside Taehyung and he put two and two together to realise what was going on. 

"He doesn't know?" You shook your head in an answer to Jimin's question. Of course, he didn't know. To know he would have to pay you any kind of attention and be kind to you. 

"No, I was in the middle of giving it to him when he called me clingy." Jin stared over at Taehyung in shock as he shook his head. This was something the two of you had been trying for so long, even the boys were excited about all of this. 

"I've been stressed baby, I didn't mean to call you clingy...Can someone tell me what's going on?" None of you spoke you just stared at Taehyung and then down to the box. Smiling weakly as you nodded your head at it, 

"Open the box baby." You told him as Jin went to go and cut the cake up for everyone. The boys all staring at Taehyung as he picked up the box carefully. Worried that he had forgotten an anniversary or a birthday but the moment he opened the box he teared up. Staring from the contents and then back up to you as he felt himself beginning to cry. 

"You're really-" You nodded your head at him, smiling brightly as he threw the box down onto the ground. Rushing over to you and pulling you into his arms, face buried in your neck as he cried softly. 

Yoongi chuckled picking up the shirt that had fallen from the box, "World's best dad," with an image of Taehyung on the bottom of it. 

"You're really pregnant?!" He questioned pulling back to look at you as you nodded. 

"Almost 4 months," You breathed out looking at him as he began to cry. Eyes dancing from your stomach to your face wondering how he hadn't even noticed anything until now. 

"We're going to have a baby!" He yelled out excitedly turning to face all of the boys as he yelled it out over and over again.

"I'm going to be a father!" He mumbled looking at you again, you felt yourself beginning to tear up again as he pulled you into another embrace. 

"I'm sorry I said what I said," You shook your head at him, promising him that it was completely fine. 

"You've been stressed, maybe I should have told you before-"

"No. No, this is perfect. The boys all know, we can celebrate together." He smiled, holding your face in his hands before kissing you softly. Using his thumb to rub your tears away from your cheeks.

Tagline: @lyoongx​ @mitzwinchester​ @rjsmochii​ @taestannie​ @sw33tnight​ @sweeneyblue1​ @jin-from-the-block​ @acciocriativity​ @mwitsmejk​ @taeechwitaa​ @justbangtanthingz​ @stillwithlix​ @misa0000​

[zoofitness]

RACE REPORT: Cedar Hill Triathlon! 🌳

TL;DR: it was hot and hard, but I DID IT

First of all… I FREAKING DID IT!!! This was my first Olympic distance race in preparation for #ironmanwaco703 and given the conditions today, I absolutely CRUSHED IT!! I’m so unbelievably proud of myself for completing such a tough course with a horrifying high temperature, at a distance that was double my previous efforts. Let’s dig in!

To get the obvious out of the way…it was HOT. When I woke up at 4:15am, my phone already showed that it was 85*. Lovely. I had been anxiously watching the weather all week, but today held firm: a high of 107. I knew from the start this was gonna be one tough day.

THE SWIM: Oh my gosh, the swim! My first goal for the day was to just get through the swim. I really struggle with open water still, and while I can do 1500 in a pool I could only go about 300y in open water before having to stop and rest and get my breathing under control. So I was nervous to say the least. The water was also WARM - 80*! But I stuck to my plan and put on my wetsuit, even though my friend and I were the only two people wearing wetsuits for the event. I nearly took it off, but I could practically hear another friend yelling at me from Fort Worth to race what I practiced, especially since my swim on Friday went sooo much better than the one Thursday. And I’m SO glad I kept it on! The race was delayed by an hour due to complications with road closures, and the wind had started to pick up. I started out on the swim, and felt good to start…until I turned and seemed to be making zero progress towards the far buoy. I kept on trying to swim, waves were crashing into me, and I had the thought of oh god, I’m being pulled to shore!

Turns out, the buoy was floating away from us due to the wind! Luckily a sprint athlete told me to turn and go to the next one; at that point I had already hit 500y. And that’s when it got REALLY tough - now waves were cresting over me, causing me to get really disoriented and have such a hard time fighting through. I definitely NEVER want to swim in an ocean after that! And it was mass chaos in the lake - people were DNFing left and right, I heard a lifeguard blow a whistle for help at one point, but I just kept on swimming. I actually heard that 10% of the athletes were pulled from the swim! I finally finished the turn to head back to the dock…but I still had one lap to go. And I had already hit 1000y! Thankfully the second half was much easier and I got into a good rhythm and got it done with 500 extra yards. Phew! I was so happy to make it out of the water!! I feel so incredibly accomplished and proud!! For fun, check out my gps of the swim - certainly is an interesting shape 😂

THE BIKE: Man they said there were hills, and they weren’t lying. A large hill right out of transition, and bonked pretty badly going up it. Ended up walking and feeling the brain fog, not good at all. But once at the top hopped back on my bike and off I went to begin the loops. A slow first half of the first loop, but I was trying really hard to focus on my nutrition to set me up for the run. Finally hit a nice downhill section and got to make up some time, and then at the last leg of the loop there was another large hill. I just didn’t have it in me, so walked my way up with some other athletes. It was HOT now. And I still had another loop! Similar to the first, I was slow the first half but made up time in the second. But right before I got to the big hill I dropped my bottle as I was getting it out of the cage! Luckily I had almost finished all my Gatorade at that point so I wasn’t too concerned, but was disappointed. Got to the last hill and began walking back up with a little trio - I think we may have been the last on the course. We were struggling to walk up with the heat, but then a wonderful volunteer drove up to us in a car and had water for us! AND he had grabbed my bottle that I dropped so I got it back!! Hooray!! Finished the bike strong and was ready to get off and get the run done. I’m really happy that I kept such a good schedule hydrating and getting my nutrition in!

THE RUN: one word: HOT. Like surface of the sun hot, felt like 104* hot, and I had to run 6 miles. But you know what? Even after a hard bike course my legs felt GREAT. When I started the run, I knew I was going to finish. I just had to take it nice and slow and try to thermoregulate as much as I could because my heart rate instantly spiked.

The volunteers are absolutely what saved the run course. They had additional aid stations with plenty of water and cold towels about every half mile or so, and I wouldn’t have made it as strongly as I did without them. There was one station that you hit 3 times in one loop of the run, and they had so much energy and were so helpful in dumping water all over me helping me to stay cool. By the second lap I had cooled my core down enough to run a little more than walk, and was feeling strong. I was able to finish with my head held high and still feeling great!!

This race was one heck of an experience, and without a doubt the hardest thing I have ever done. But I had SO MANY good things happen today, I wouldn’t change any of it! (Ok I’m kidding, less than 100* would be nice)

The tagline for Ironman triathlons is “anything is possible” and this race truly proved that phrase to be true. Anything is possible, and now I know I can do ANYTHING. Ironman Waco 70.3 here I come!!! 🏊🏻‍♀️ 🚴🏻‍♀️ 🏃🏻‍♀️

[pepperonijem]

When He Sees Me || Peter Parker

MASTERLIST

Pairing:  Peter Parker x Reader

Warnings: um peter might be a little ooc and that’s because i’m writing about my unfortunate crush but i basically just changed his name to peter parker any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental <3 

Word count: 2.5k

Summary: What if when he sees me, I like him and he knows it? What if he opens up a door and I can’t close it? Catching feelings for your best friend is never easy.

A/N: This fic is sponsored in part by @bitchassbucky, @spiderrpcrker, @shurisneakers, @midnightsunfae, and @blackberrybucky who instead of shutting down my feelings, hyped me up to turn my crush and some of the things that we’ve done into a fic <3 this goes out to anyone who has ever started crushing on their best friend.

Oh God, please don’t walk this way, please don’t wa-

“Oh, hey Peter!” The crack in your voice betrayed your attempt at a casual greeting, despite your efforts to disguise it with a cough. “How’s it-- how’s it hanging?”

“You good?” Peter smiled at you but his eyebrow quirked upwards in concern. “I just wanted to make sure we’re still on for tonight?” His concern faded into a wide grin as you nodded in response. Peter gave you a quick goodbye before walking away towards his next class.

As soon as you saw him turn into the classroom, you turned to face your closed locker, letting out a groan before setting your forehead against it. Peter had asked if you were good, and although you nodded, the butterflies in your stomach threatened to give you away. You were very much not good.

A tap on your shoulder snapped you out of your thoughts and you turned to see your friend MJ. “What did Peter do this time?” MJ asked. For the last month, every interaction with Peter -- there have been a lot -- ended this way: a groan of defeat and a few welted lines on your forehead from holding your head against your locker. You turned to give MJ a dirty look, annoyed by the amused smirk on her face.

“Absolutely nothing,” you sighed, finally lifting your head up to talk to her. You opened your locker as you talked, not wanting to make eye contact with MJ as you confessed your feelings. “He just… smiled… and everything went downhill from there.” You rolled your eyes as MJ laughed. “It’s getting worse, I have no idea how I’m going to get through tonight.”

MJ laid a hand on your shoulder. “Well we’ll all be there,” she offered. “And if it makes you feel better, no one’s even noticed. Just act normal and you’ll be fine.” She shrugged her shoulders as if that was the easiest thing to do. But you couldn’t act normal anymore, not with Peter. Not when normal means resting your head against his shoulder every time he makes you laugh. Not when normal means borrowing his clothes when his aunt May tells you to stay the night every time a study session runs too long. Not when normal means wearing the extra sweater he keeps for you because you always forget yours.

Normal was when you didn’t feel butterflies everytime he looked at you, before your curious heart got the better of you and you began to wonder what it might be like to hold his hand. Now, things were just weird. At least for you. Nothing on the surface had changed, no one noticed how your heart rate picked up every time Peter touched you, or how you suddenly felt hot whenever he winked at you. But inside your heart was navigating uncharted territory in your friendship, trying to traipse along the thin line that separated how things have always been and how you suddenly wish things could be.

Pulling your textbook out of your locker, you shut the locker door a just a little bit more aggressively than necessary. MJ gave you a small hug before linking her arm through yours as you walked to your next class.

For the rest of the day, you found it impossible to focus on anything. Instead of taking down notes on George Orwell in English, you found yourself absentmindedly doodling hearts. Everything just reminded you of Peter and your own confusing feelings. Thankfully, you didn’t share any classes with him today, leaving you enough solitude to think about just why you were so frustrated with yourself.

Logically, you knew there was nothing wrong with having a crush on someone. You’ve had plenty of crushes before, a few of which reflected a temporary lapse in judgement on your part. You remember telling Peter about each of them, gushing about the most basic acts of human decency as he rolled his eyes and told you that you deserve someone better, but nevertheless helping you pick up the pieces every time someone broke your heart. That, you realized, was what scared you the most.

If you were to date, and then break up… well who would be there with kind words and your favorite boba when everything fell apart? The thought of losing your best friend over emotions, feelings, left far too much to chance. Was the idea of holding his hand, of hearing him call you his enough to make you risk the friendship that has always been enough for you? It should be enough for you, you reminded yourself. There was too much on the line and not enough guarantee for you to risk it.

With that determination in mind, you steeled yourself for the rest of the day, determined to put your feelings to rest and go back to normal.

Unfortunately, that plan quickly fell through.

You got to the restaurant a half hour late with only a really good nap to blame. You felt bad that your friends were waiting for you, but when you got there, you found an empty spot next to Peter, where your usual order of ramen was waiting and against your will, the butterflies flew rampant. The noodle that hit Peter’s nose as he ate while waving you over made you laugh as you sat down beside him.

“I got you your usual,” Peter explained in between bites. You smiled and thanked him before digging in. Peter had done this for you many times, and you willed your body to fight against the flutter of your heart.

Thankfully, the rest of your dinner was going well, and everyone had plenty of stories to tell. MJ had begun doing more portraits of people in distress and revealed her latest piece -- a portrait of Peter slurping up a noodle only to get a rogue drop of soup in his eye. Ned and Betty were off again, but of course they tried to keep it civil (they were on again by the end of the night) so no one would have to pick sides. Flash teased Peter about the B that he made on his literature exam yesterday over poetry and Peter’s face turned beet red.

“Hey,” Peter began, attempting to defend himself. “I totally could’ve made a perfect score. I was just distracted.” He shrunk down in his seat a little bit, and the rest of you laughed teasingly.

“Yeah, you’re telling me,” Flash continued. “You’ve been drawing little hearts all over your notes, dude, it’s unsettling.” He rolled his eyes and took another bite of his food, swirling his fork around the bowl trying to grab as much noodle as possible.

Across the table, you and MJ made eye contact, a look of surprise between the both of you. You tried to signal her to say something before a weird silence fell on the table, but she was not reading your cues. Thankfully, Peter spoke again.

“H-hearts?” He repeated. “Why would I be drawing hearts on my notes?” Although he tried to play it off, the rise in pitch gave him away. He scrunched his face in exaggeration.

“Actually,” Betty began. “Now that I think about it, you were doing that in Spanish class too.” You glanced over at Peter who looked at you with panic in his eyes. You took a long sip of water, suddenly feeling a layer of sweat form at the back of your neck. “Wonder what that’s about.” She shrugged and turned to Ned asking if he wanted to split a slice of cheesecake with her.

Before Peter had a chance to try to defend himself once again, the waitress appeared. “Are you all ready for the check?” she asked.

“Yeah, but we’re splitting the check,” Flash replied. Betty rolled her eyes in response. “What? Just because I’m rich does not mean I have to share the wealth.”

The waitress nodded in response. As she was leaving Peter called her back. “Oh wait,” he called. “I’ll also be paying for this order,” he gestured to your bowl. She smiled at him and headed for the counter.

“Peter,” you smiled. “I have money, I can pay for myself.” Although Peter usually had to order for you, he didn’t usually pay for you, unless it was a special occasion.

“I know, I just wanted to be nice,” he responded, giving your shoulder a playful nudge. “Plus, you seem like you’ve had a rough week. Every time I see you, you seem to be lost in thought. What’s been on your mind?” The sentence came out casually, but the furrow in his brows revealed how concerned he actually has been. Peter was nothing if not observant, like he could sense things better than most people.

You let out a sigh, unsure of what to say. You didn’t want to lie to Peter, but you also didn’t want to tell him the truth, that you were thinking about him-- well, your feelings for him. Just when it seemed like he had backed you into a corner, however, the waitress had returned with the checks, and the question left unanswered.

After dinner, the six of you went to Flash’s house to watch a movie. He had a home theater and early access to new movies and he loved to remind everyone of that. Not that any of you minded, especially if it got you free popcorn and a movie out of it. Every week, a different person got to select the movie and today, unfortunately, was MJ’s turn.

You loved her, of course, but you absolutely detested her taste in movies. Mostly because she was a horror junkie, and you were absolutely not. Her last few turns however had been spent making sure you all had seen all of the Shrek movies. But today, she picked a horror film. Something about demons and the like. Peter and Betty cheered at her selection as Flash groaned. You settled into the couch in the back of the room and grabbed a blanket. Ned and Betty sat together on a smaller loveseat, and MJ sat on the floor in front of Flash’s seat, the perfect spot to be able to scare him with a single touch on his leg.

Peter sat down beside you, handing you a tub of popcorn and a soda. He pulled the blanket over his own lap as he sat criss-cross on the couch. You tried not to pay attention to how his leg was brushing against yours under the blanket, instead focusing on the screen as the room went dark.

The movie had just started, but you could already feel yourself tense up in expectation.The music was coming to a crescendo and you knew something was already going to happen. You didn’t realize just how tightly your fists had balled together in your lap till you jumped at the sound of Peter’s soft voice at the shell of your ear. “Are you okay?” He asked.

He tried to hold in a chuckle as you almost bounced the tub of popcorn off your lap. He grabbed it from you and set it to the side. “Look,” he pointed to the screen where the creature’s head had just rotated a full circle as it crawled up the wall in pursuit of the main character. “That thing kinda looks like the spider from that kid’s tv show, but not as creepy.” You let out a laugh, a little louder than you meant, and Ned turned to tell you to shut up.

The small joke was enough to dissipate the anxiety you felt towards the movie, but unfortunately only heightened your feelings about Peter. But he noticed how your fists unclenched and how your shoulders relaxed once you laughed, so he continued to tell you whispered jokes for the rest of the movie. Each time he noticed your body tensing, he tried his best to make you laugh, and god, how could you stop yourself from those butterflies anymore?

At the height of the movie, you found yourself with your hands over your ears, and eyes squeezed shut, unable to even look at the screen or hear a joke. When Peter realized a joke wouldn’t be enough, he slid closer to you and pulled you into his side and you buried your face into the crook of his neck. Before you had a chance to think about the spicy notes of his cologne or the softness of his skin, the sound of a high pitched scream in the movie caused you to jump with a gasp. In response, Peter wrapped his arms around you tight, with a gentle shush.

It was only after the music began to die down that you opened your eyes again, only to find Peter’s eyes fixed on the screen. Now that the worst was over, you no longer had an excuse to be in his embrace the way you were. You began to wiggle your way out of his arms, attracting his attention.

“What are you doing?” he whispered.

“Peter I’m a big kid,” you smiled, teasing. “You don’t have to hold me like a baby.” Peter let out a soft laugh before relaxing his hold on you just a bit.

“Okay,” he relented. “I’ll just hold you like this then.” He began to shift so that your head was on his shoulder, and one of his arms looped under yours, intertwining your fingers. The smile on his face was calm as if this was something the two of you did all the time, but his racing heartbeat reminded you this was something new.

The two of you remained that way for the rest of the movie. By the time the soft music began to play in the credits, you could hear light snoring from everyone else in the room. However, you and Peter made absolutely no efforts to untangle yourselves from each other. It was as if you were worried that once the lights came back on, you would never find yourself like this again, and what a sad idea that was. Normal, would never be enough for you again, not when you know now how much better life could be like this.

You weren’t sure if it was the adrenaline from the jump scares, or the sureness of his hand in yours, like it’s always belonged there, that gave you the courage to finally break the silence.

“Peter,” you breathed out, lifting your head from his shoulder, but not letting go of his hand.

He turned to you, with a look of concern, afraid of what you might say.

“Kiss me.” The words came out so softly and so quickly that you weren’t sure if you said it at all.

“Finally,” he whispered as his lips fell against yours, softly and slowly. He pulled away after what felt like hours and yet not nearly enough time. His hands reached up to cup your face. “I like you,” he admitted. “So much.”

Suddenly, you felt it. You felt exactly what it must feel like to fly, to let yourself go without worrying about gravity or anything else. The risks were still there, the numbers hadn’t changed, but you knew that no matter what happened next, just having the chance to fly would always be enough.

[ghostonly]

Fixing up a shirt that's too big and needs tailoring.

A couple years ago, I kept thinking to myself, how does one even acquire goth or grunge clothing? And the conclusion I came to is that you need either a lot of money for band merch and studded leather and all that shit, or you need to get your hands in it and fuck around with what you have and make something grungy and homemade, so that's what I'm doing cause I'm poor as shit lmao

Now that my chest is flat, and I'm recovered enough and have a minute, I'm making up a shirt that I've been planning to do for like over a year now. I ordered a few things a year and a half ago and I fucked up the order because they didn't have any 3-6x sizes in stock for this plain, black shirt I wanted, but they did have 7x, and I said, "fuck it, it'll be baggy but it probably won't be THAT much bigger than the stuff I usually wear."

I was very wrong

I've been wearing them anyway (I've got 2 of them) but like, they don't look good lmao. These things are made for one of those guys who is not only large but built like a fucking skyscraper

But lots of extra fabric means great for customizing in a fun way. So anyway I have been wanting to put the cover of The Twilight Sad album "nobody wants to be here and nobody wants to leave" on a shirt, cause it's a great album and the art is a great vibe, but the art is in white. I looked up some ways to put white on black fabric and decided to make a bleaching stencil

Here are some progress shots from while I was working on it. I guessed at the CD shape and then freehand copied the outline of the art with a 5x4 comparison grid

I made this strip to block out where letters would go with the intention of painting on the details with additional bleach after spraying

Then used a razor knife to cut where I wanted the border to go through on the drawing when I sprayed it with bleach

After the stencil was ready, I stuck the shirt around a big plastic drawer so that the bottom of the drawer would be a working surface and the bleach wouldn't bleed onto the back of the shirt (as u can see, it is a very large shirt :') there was actually extra fabric I clipped onto the drawer's edge with binder clips)

Before I actually starting with the spraying, I did also stick more cardstock (it's not regular paper, it's like twice as thick) under the edges of the stencil frame to guard the rest of the shirt, but I didn't get a picture of that

This is my first time doing this and you're not actually supposed to do it with paper but I didn't realize that until I'd already spent like 2 hours making it, so i said fuck it, it's fine if it isn't perfect. You're supposed to make it with freezer paper and iron it onto the shirt temporarily and the temporary adhesion of the plastic keeps the bleach and shit from spreading and the stencil from moving (both would have been really handy but Oh Well 😪)

So after spending an hour spraying the bleach and adding detail with a broken-off pencil I kept dipping in bleach (I was trying to use the method of a guy who used a wooden skewer but I don't have any) this is what I've got

It's messy as hell but I kinda like that it is. Looks fucked up in a good way and that's what I like about doing crafts for grungy purposes - it's very low stress, if not low effort

I don't think it's that orange irl but the sun had mostly gone down so I was taking pictures under a lamp

I was surprised at how well the intact lines came out considering how thin they were. As you can see, some of them "blew up" because they got too wet and spread, but that's okay. It's good to know that, with spraying, you can get really good detail. I will probably do this again in the future with freezer paper so I can iron it on

Anyway, it's in the wash now. I'll post pictures of the finished... Drawing? When it's done drying

Then later I'll add more when I've done the actual tailoring bit because the whole shirt is getting overhauled