#and now we have to suffer bc someone thought this was smart
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deathisamotherofbeauty · 21 days ago
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wish I could just let go of things but I can never!!
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aequitaes · 1 year ago
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@sicsemper suffer my tag rambles. âœŒđŸ»
The way Haikaveh/Kavetham is written in a way that makes both of them have their individual characters while also being an integral part in each other's lives. Both of them have their own beliefs and ideology. They both have different things they work on, Alhaitham being this avid researcher and Kaveh being this idealistic artist. Their characters don't necessarily revolve around each other all the time, but there is no doubt that they are both very important people to each other. Kaveh is the exception to Alhaitham, and Alhaitham grounds Kaveh. They each complete the other while the other completes them. So even though they're their own people, you can't separate the influence they have on each other.
#/SLAMS FISTS DOWN/#/ME ON A DAILY BASIS SCREAMING AT THE MILK MAN LIKE—/#/DO YOU KNOW AND EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH IM FUCKING INSANE OVER THIS SHIP/#[ it’s not —- /even/ kiss kiss fall in love ✹ like do I want to smush their faces together and say nAoO kiss. sure. bc. they should#[ COUGH SUBTLE NOT SUBTLE HINT AT MIKA ]#[ I know this post outlines some of the Brief thoughts about Them but just in general they are a very well written and interesting concept]#[ like if you wanna do the thing of ✹opposites attract✹ sure — but it’s deeper than that. kaveh kinda seeks alhaitham back in the scHOOLING#days. he is Such an empathetic person that I shake him at times. and yet. I get it. I too am someone who just wants to understand emotions#and people. kinda like kaveh — that could fall into the people pleasing aspect - but it’s by being broad overthinker as (and a touch#dramatic - alright I’ll call myself out 😉 - that gives kaveh the ability to see the other perspective even if that can be a little#challenging at times. and it’s more like a challenge in and of itself. in Kaveh’s voice line he speaks about how alhaitham Does have a#personality - it’s just a big one and others wouldn’t understand#now I do think of kaveh sat down for a god Damn mINUTE. he would realise he knows alhaitham bigger and better than his /wHAT DOES THIS MEAN#thoughts â„ąïž and though they bicker like an old married couple — alhaitham just is the exception for kaveh. could it be argued that it was#more of an empathetic / sympathetic view to begin with ( as well as the more important he’s smart and I like smart people (v important not#to take away from that )) yes. to a degree — again — not the entire reason but it could be discussed (not argued pls we suffer enough#kavetham bickering ) that this was part of the original idea. and then they became friends. so beyond just being smart they must have#enjoyed each others company ( not me thinking about them laughing together đŸ„čđŸ„čđŸ„čđŸ„č )#(sorry brain went pause for a second cause them being happy is good for everyone’s soul thanks )#and within that kaveh would have picked up habits . routine . in their own ways they’re creatures of habit. again. I feel like this is more#from alhaithams perspective (mika feel free to chime off in the comments) and kaveh naturally adapts to that#empath. people’s feelings. people’s likes and dislikes#picture if you will. alhaitham noting that his favourite mug was dirty and he couldn’t have it for his coffee#thEN marriage bickering probably if wE knOw who’s responsibility that is. which leads on to something else#and he probably follows him to his room and then the mug is entirely forgotten about and it’s a different bicker entirely.#but mr dramatic stormy off pouty pants - y’know what he does? amidst his dramatic hand throwing and comments#he washes the mug. not because that was the original disagreement - no the mug was long forgotten - but because alhaitham commented#on it not being there for him. hello. happy alhaitham pls.#and it’s probably noted to eNSURE that mug is good to go for him from then on out#uGHHHHHHHH THATS ALHAITHAMS FUCKING WIFE
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enden-k · 9 months ago
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(Sorry for the ramble but these 2 idiots have been stuck in my brain for days now)
Soo can we talk about the fact that after the meeting with Sunday, Ratio immediately asks if Aven is okay. Like my dude, you're still in the dream and are being watched, that's not how someone who just 'betrayed' another person  acts.
Also, Aven being the one who has to subtly correct Ratio (at least thats the interpretation im going with) reminding him that they still have to act like they hate each other. (They're both geniuses in completely different ways, textbook definition of book smarts vs streets smarts)
ALSO, dispite that slip up from Ratio, Aven still doubting whether Ratio was acting or not (someone get this man a hug and some therapy I swear)
Anyways, I love these 2 idiots, and I hope we get to see more of their dynamic, specifically outside Penacony, bc I suspect most of what we saw was an act to trick The Family, and their actual dynamic hasn't been shown that much
its in ratios nature to be so harsh and not filtering, its just ratio
to shorten it, hoyo literally made him a tsundere. he calls aventurine an idiot and cares about his wellbeing. HIS SHY FACE IS HIM LOOKING ANGRY AND AVERTING HIS EYES HHHHHDHHHH its all so obvious
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my thoughts/short ramble abt their dynamic utc
while all that happened was aventurine and ratio acting and fooling everyone, i dont think much in their dynamic would change outside of it. ratio is harsh and sarcastic and angry and loud etcetc (not out of malice) but he does care at the same time so i see him keep up his usual ratio-typical behavior towards aventurine - altho softening, toning it down, especially when aventurine is clearly suffering/behaving differently than you usually see him (like when he asked him if hes okay or when he thought he offended him) but other times harsh as usual, maybe even more aggressive when aventurine does get under his skin what a tsundere
(also, when you pair him with aventurine, he says (in his usual harsh way) "take care of yourself, i dont need your concern" - i think this shows really nicely how his dynamic/feelings toward aventurine are - harsh and caring in the same breath, aventurine is self destructive after all)
anw yea ig i derailed a bit sorry. i think ratio raised his usual behavior by some lvls than he would usually treat aventurine to not raise suspicions, trying to come off like he doesnt care and like aventurine is an unpleasant annoyance
the cutscene where aventurine is about lie and sentence himself? the look ratio gives him?
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when aventurine is about to open the box that will expose his lie and he looks up to catch ratios gaze before he turns away ?
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maybe im thinking too much into it, theres also prob different ways to interpret this but their lingering gazes, like a silent exchange between them underneath that act and ratio turning away when he gets his answer-
and yea like u mentioned ratios acting, his behavior towards aventurine, being so good that even aventurine is doubting if its an act or his true feelings towards him (giving him that hug myself!!!!!!)
anw thats my (not organized) thoughts tho, maybe their dynamic does change to smth entirely different than what i babble abt here, who knows. anw cant wait to see them reunite and show more!!!
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strwyofthesun · 1 year ago
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forgive me, goodbye [pt. 2]
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pairing: re2r!leon kennedy x intern!reader
synopsis: after settling into the uk, you learn of the raccoon city incident and suffer a great loss. after graduating from med school and starting up your internship, you meet someone who you thought you've left in the past.
word count: 3.7k
cont: smut, unprotected sex, p in v, mentions of death, mentions of blood, hurt/comfort, there's so much stuff goin on idk anymore
a/n: i did not expect to write a part 2 of this but my best friend bitched about not liking the ending so i did this out of spite <3 also! this takes place after the re2 events and before operation javier. i did alot of research on the re timeline and other medical related things mentioned T_T last, leon looks so cute in the pic i choose that bc his outfit there is similar to his operation javier fit
part one here !
A week has gone by since you’ve moved in the UK and you had been feeling homesick. Even though you had settled into your dorm, made new friends, and gotten acquainted, nothing beats the company of family. Not only have you been missing family, but also Leon. Feeling distressed, you decided to call your family to see how they’re doing.
You go through your contacts and scroll down to find your Mom’s contact. You spotted her name and pressed dial. The phone lets out a ring that lasted for only a couple seconds as your mom had picked up the call.
“Hey mom
 Is dad with you?”
“Hey honey! Yes, he’s over here!” Your mom called for your dad and you hear his voice in the background shouting back to wait for him. You let out a laugh hearing your parents shuffle around. “What’s up hun? How’s everything going there?” Your dad asked.
“Everything’s fine dad, I’m just a little homesick
”
“Aww, hun
 We miss you dearly too
 You’ve grown up into such a fine, successful, smart, and independent young lady. We couldn’t be any more proud of you. Call us anytime, we promise we’ll always answer the call at the first ring.” Your mom said.
“Hey mom
?”
“Yes?”
You gulped down the lump you felt in your throat, “How’s Leon doing?”
“Oh
 I heard he’s out of town.”
“
Is that so?”
“You know who I miss?” Your dad suddenly chimed in.
“Who dad?” You asked curiously while smiling.
“You and Leon. You remind me of you and your mom back in the day.” Your smile dropped hearing those words from your dad. It made you miss him even more and your parents could tell by the silence on your end of the line.
Your mom nudged your dad and scolded him, “Hun! Come on! She’s trying to move on, don’t make it any harder for our baby.”
“I’m fine mom, really. I just wanted to know
”
“Well, alright
 If you say so.”
“I’ll be going now, I have a class in a bit.”
“Okay, call us if you need anything!” Your dad reminded again.
“I will, I will. Love you guys
”
“We love you too hun.” They said in union and dropped the call. It was nice hearing their voices again. You opened a box filled with pictures, looking for ones of you guys together when you were suddenly greeted with tons of pictures of you and Leon together on top of the pile. A certain picture caught your eye and you grabbed it to take a closer look. It was a picture of the night you, Leon, and your parents celebrated your graduation from pre-med. Tears fill your eyes and drops of it landed on the picture, slightly damaging the ink. You try desperately to remove your tears stains from the picture but ended up smudging the photo and getting the ink over your parents’ faces. You threw the picture back in the box and curled up at the foot of your bed and sobbed silently.
You didn’t regret your choice of pursuing your dream of becoming a virologist but God, did you really have to go through this just to reach it? You tried controlling your heaving and sniffled as an attempt to quit crying because you had a class in a few minutes. You stood up and walked yourself to the bathroom to wash yourself up. Looking into the mirror, you realized that you’re already here and it’s too late to quit now. You’ve sacrificed so much of your time, effort, and relations for this. Quitting isn’t an option.
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Days passed by and you drowned yourself in your studies. You were currently one of the best in your class and according to your professors, you had the most promising potential. Meanwhile, Leon was out of town just as your mom said and was wasting away in God knows where. All he wanted to do was get away from that town and escape the memories it held. He drank his sorrows away but no bottle of alcohol could ever fill the void in his heart. It’s as if you took a piece of his heart and left with it and there was no chance of ever getting it back.
During one late night, he received a call from his co- officer telling him not to go back to Raccoon City even though there was a current crisis, but Leon didn’t listen. He sobered up and immediately headed back to Raccoon City. The following events that unfolded are to be summed up and named “Raccoon City Destruction Incident” from then on.
While studying in a cafĂ© with your earphones on, you realized that it’s been awhile since you’ve called your parents. You ring them up but they don't picked up.
“Weird, they usually answer at the first ring
” You mumbled to yourself. You try again and to no avail. “Again.” you said but call after call they didn’t pick up. Now you were really worried. Out of frustration, you take your earphones off and take a sip of your coffee when you start picking up on the sounds of the cafĂ©. But what caught your attention made you drop the coffee cup in your hands.
“The US government declared Raccoon City 'beyond saving' from its residents that have turned aggressive and zombie-like. They ordered a missile strike to wipe out the city and later at dawn, it is reported that two non-nuclear missiles hit the city, clearing all of its 100,000 citizens, and completely wiping it off the map.“
Ringing filled your ears and your hands trembled at the news you had just heard. “This can’t be happening
” you thought. A waiter walked up to you demanding you pay for the broken coffee cup but you couldn’t hear him well. His words sounded like it was being drowned out by water. Your body went on auto-pilot and you grab whatever amount of money you had on you and shoved it into the chest of the waiter. You grabbed your stuff and exit the cafĂ© while calling for a taxi cab.
You rushed back to your dorm and packed your stuff immediately. Things weren’t properly processed in your mind and before you knew it you were on a flight back to the US. You took a cab to the outskirts of what’s left of Raccoon City before you were blocked by multiple hazard signs, barricades, and police tape. You tried to get passed it but police stopped you before you could even step past the barricade. You stare at the massive crater left by the missiles and what remained of your old home. Streams of tears run down your face and you couldn’t stop it. The police tried calming you down but it was useless. They couldn’t do anything except escort you back to the hotel you checked in.
Once you were at your hotel room, you drop to your knees and wailed. You couldn't fathom the intensity of all the feelings that you were experiencing all at once. Everyone you knew and loved were turned into those
 monsters you saw on the news. They were killed, wiped out, with no trace left. Your friends, family, mom, dad, and Leon, all gone. You cried even harder now that things have finally started sinking in. You recall your last call with your parents, them saying how proud they were, and them saying they love you, it was agonizing. And Leon... Oh Leon
 you left him alone and heartbroken in Raccoon City. You blamed yourself for their deaths. You imagined your parents worried sick for you because you haven’t called them in awhile as well as Leon who was probably grieving still over the breakup. The image of them worried and scared for their life, was all you could think about. Tears didn’t stop flowing and you’ve lost your voice from screaming. You asked yourself, was this punishment for leaving? Did you deserve to suffer this much?
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It's 2002 and four years have passed since. Not a single day went by where you didn’t think of your parents and Leon. You’ve let yourself grieve, gotten therapy, and took a break from med school for awhile. But in the end, you pushed through with it because you knew they would’ve wanted you to push through. You were a step closer to becoming a virologist and its something you’ve worked extra hard on this time. You promised yourself that once you finished everything, you’d dedicate the rest of your life studying the viruses that caused the Raccoon City Destruction Incident and find a vaccine for any virus that could turn people to what the Raccoon citizens became. But for now, you are currently taking up your one year internship.
It was a regular day at the hospital, nothing out of the ordinary. You examined patients, spent your time in the laboratories, and conduct medical procedures along with other doctors. Soon, the mundane day of yours came to an end, or so you thought. As you were about to clock out, a fellow intern called for you.
“Hey [Y/N]! Wait up!” They said as they grabbed onto your shoulder, puffing out heavy breaths.
“Hmm? What’s wrong?” You asked in concern seeing that it was most probably urgent based on the face your colleague made.
“There’s someone out there asking for a CBC.”
“Okay and? You do it. Can’t you see I’m about to leave? I’m about to be overtime.” You replied feeling annoyed from being interrupted as you were about to leave.
“C’mon, do me a favour will ya? I’ll do your stool examinations for a week. Pleaseeeee
” your colleague said while giving you puppy eyes. You cringed at the sight of them and finally gave in to their request.
You rolled your eyes and gave an empty threat. “Fine, I’ll do it. You better stick to your word or else.”
They nodded their head ecstatically and hugged you before they left. “Ugh
” you thought to yourself. If you had just declined, you would’ve been home by now doing anything as long as you weren’t here in the hospital. You grabbed a folder and headed to the counter whilst keeping your head down.
“Hello, good evening, I heard you came in for a CBC?” You greeted.
“Yes, how long do I have to wait for you [Y/N]?” A familiar voice asked. You stopped fiddling with the folder and furrowed your brows. Where have you heard this voice before? Then, it clicked. It couldn’t be

You looked up at the person opposite to you and met a pair of piercing blue eyes you know you’ve seen before. The tall frame, muscular build, dirty blonde hair. You couldn’t believe it. It was like staring at a ghost. The blood drained from your face as you step back in horror, refusing to believe that the Leon Scott Kennedy was standing right infront of you, alive.
“Woah, hey, are you okay?” Leon asked as he held his hands out.
“Am I okay
? Okay?! I thought you died?!” You screamed which caught the attention of other hospital staff and patients. You look around and apologized and looked back at Leon. “Look, I’ll do your CBC. But you have explaining to do.”
“I know I do, I’m sorry [Y/N]
” Leon apologized and looked down, feeling ashamed from being away from you all these years and suddenly popping out of nowhere.
You scoff and led Leon to a room to extract a sample of his blood. He took off his jacket revealing his more muscular figure. He looked different now. His eyes were as captivating as ever, but it lost its shine. You didn’t want to pry now, but if he escaped the incident back at Raccoon City, he must’ve seen some fucked up shit. You grab the tourniquet and start to tie it around his arm.
“Tell me if it feels too tight.” You instructed Leon and he nodded in response. “Is this alright?” you ask to which he nodded again in response. You start feeling around his arm trying to locate a vein. Your touch sent shivers down Leon’s spine, painting him a shade of pink. You'd almost miss it if his long hair blocked his face. You chuckled at the sight of Leon, “I’m barely doing anything. Did you miss me that much?” you teased.
“You have no idea.” He replied smiling.
Once you’ve located the vein, you did the standard procedure and in a blink of an eye you had a sample of his blood. You took of the tourniquet off his arm and patched him up. He stood up from the seat and put his jacket back on. The silence was deafening, as an attempt to break the ice, you asked, “So
 Why do you need the CBC?”
“Just an excuse to see you to be honest.”
You quickly turned to face him, “Are you crazy?” you spat.
“Borderline. It’d be nice to know if I’m healthy or not though.”
“You wasted my time and equipment Leon.” You said while crossing your arms.
“Okay, okay, I’m kidding. I need it to update my health information for the government.”
“Hmm, okay. Do you want the results now or tomorrow?”
“It can wait. Come on, let’s head out now. My treat.”
“Don’t rush me!”
You finish up whatever’s left to do and finally clock out. You and Leon left the hospital and walked up to the parking lot.
“Here, put this on.” He tossed you a helmet and wore his as he started his motorbike. You put on the helmet and sat behind him.
“Hold on tight ‘kay?” You barely held onto Leon, still feeling off. He sped up on the road which made you nervous. Leon felt that you weren’t holding on properly and suddenly stopped, making you jerk forward and wrap your arms around his torso. “I told you to hold on tight didn’t I?” He smirked at you and you rolled your eyes at him. “Won’t say I told you so.” He said his final warning and revved the bike.
The streets were almost empty which gave Leon the opportunity to drive faster. This made you hold onto him tighter and Leon smiled at this under his helmet. “Not a fan of thrill rides huh?” You could barely hear Leon over the sound of the wind going past you. “I swear to God Leon, if you speed u—“ Before you could even finish, he drove even faster. You had a strong grip on Leon at this point and you could hear his muffled laughing.
Sooner or later, you arrived at a hotel where Leon was staying for the meantime. He parked his motorbike and the two of you got off. You punched Leon hard on the arm you took the blood sample from.
“Ow! What the fuck?” he said laughing.
“I hate you.” You said to him with a straight face.
“Aw, cute. You know you could never hate me. Even from the grave.”
“Haha, very funny Leon.” You said sarcastically.
The both of you walked into the hotel and entered the restaurant inside it. You both sat down and ordered food. And while waiting, Leon finally tells you about what happened four years ago.
“I want the truth Leon.” You demanded.
“Okay, please, keep an open mind alright?” You nodded in response and Leon recounts the events of the Raccoon City incident. You listened to him intently. It was hard to imagine him go through all of that. You were feeling thankful though that he is still safe and sound now.
“My parents, Leon? Do you know what happened to them?” you asked desperately wanting an answer. He shook his head and said “I’m sorry, but I don’t know. I really am sorry I didn’t save them
” You muttered a small “Oh
” and reassured Leon that it was okay. “I just wish I called them a bit more often
 I think they were worried about me even up until their death
” You say quietly.
“[Y/N]
 You are their only daughter, of course they cared. I’m sure they’re glad to know that your strong, healthy, and most importantly, you're safe now.” Leon said while holding your hand. You felt a tear run down your face and Leon used his other hand to wipe it off. He kept his hand on your cheek and gently caressed it. “I’m so sorry for the way things ended Leon
 I didn’t want to
 But—“ you were cut off by Leon.
“It’s okay
 I forgive you [Y/N].”
“But I don’t forgive myself! There wasn’t a single day where I didn’t long for your presence by my side. I wanted you near me again.”
“I felt the same way too....”
No other words were said. You looked into each other’s eyes and reignited a spark that you thought died a long time ago. The moment was short but it felt longer than that. Too bad it was actually cut short by the waiter that brought you your food. You grinned from ear to ear and Leon let out a laugh. The both of you enjoyed the fine dining and soon you escorted him to his room.
“I’ll
 be off now
” you said awkwardly to Leon while he stood leaning on the door frame.
“Do you really have to leave? It’s late at night. Stay with me for the night. It’s not safe out there.”
“Leon
”
“For old times sake
” Leon pleaded. He moved closer to you, grabbing your waist and leaning into your ear. “
Please?” he whispered.
You look at Leon, heat running through your body. He was a burning candle, and you were a moth that just couldn’t resist. Your lips crashed onto his and he slammed the door shut behind you. The both of you make it to the bed and swiftly take off each other clothes and threw it to the bedroom floor. Leon sat upright, back on the bedframe, while you were on top of him. You grinded on him slowly making him groan.
“Fuck, you don’t know how much I’ve missed this.” Leon breathed.
“Tell me Leon
 How much did you miss me?” You said as you run your hands through his hair, tugging at it. You teased him, running your wet cunt along his hard dick. Leon breathed even heavier, you could feel his dick twitch as it longed to be in you.
"I'd think of you, when I touch myself... I missed you touching me, making you screaming my name, being inside you. I missed it all. Please, let me fuck you..." Leon begged. You held yourself up and positioned his dick under you.
You and Leon both moaned when he entered you. It took some time for you to adjust to Leon again. "So tight... You haven't been fucking anyone else have you?" He asked. You shook your head and he started thrusting into you, catching you off guard. You moaned and whimpered from Leon suddenly fucking you.
"Come on baby, use your words." he demanded.
You tried to speak but your words were slurred. "O-only... you... Leon. I've only f-fucked you..."
"Mhm, that's right. You're mine, got that? And I'll make sure people know that." Leon sucked onto your neck leaving hickeys on it, marking what's his.
He quickened his pace leaving you a moaning mess. Sounds of skin slapping against each other echoing in the room. You moaned his name over and over again like a prayer. As you feel your climax coming, your walls tightening around Leon's dick. He moaned your name into your ear. "You feel so fucking good baby."
"Leon, I'm close..." You managed to get the words out of your mouth. "Cum for me baby." Leon said as his thrusts get sloppier and rougher. A scream escaped your lips as you came. Leon finished inside you making sure every bit of cum filled you to the brim.
Leon looked at you and cupped your cheek. "Why don't we make up for lost time?"
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The sunlight peaked through the gaps of the curtains and you find yourself in bed beside Leon as he sleeps peacefully. You admire Leon's beauty for a little while and brushed his hair to the side. His eyes flutter open and he greeted you in a raspy voice.
"Good morning love, did you sleep well?"
"Like a baby." You replied.
"Mhm, that's good. Come closer."
You move closer to Leon and lay on his chest. "There's something I didn't tell you last night." he said and you could hear his heart beat faster.
"Tell me..."
"I was recruited by the USSTRATCOM shortly after the incident at Raccoon City, and I'm a government agent now. These past 4 years, I've been training intensely. And in a few days, I'll be leaving for North America to my next mission."
You lay in silence, taking in the words Leon had just said.
"Say something please, [Y/N]..." Leon pleaded.
"Do you... want us to get back together, Leon? I want you to be realistic. If you're an agent, who goes on missions that you could possibly never return from, would you really want to be tied down to me?" You asked.
"I do want us back. God knows how much I want us back together. And I don't care about all that mission shit. I will return from every mission just for you."
"Are you sure Leon? Because this time, I'm willing to stay. I've lost you once, and I'm not making the same mistake again."
"I'm always sure when it comes to you. We'll make it work this time, I promise. I love you [Y/N]..."
"I love you too Leon." Those words coming out your mouth after years of longing for him gave you a feeling of euphoria and nostalgia all at once. Who knew that this time around, we'd fall right back into each other's arms.
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quillkiller · 5 months ago
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wait tell me more about fwb moonwater
..
ok so. this started as a conversation between me and my beloved sude @stillagoodwitch and then me and @sugarsnappeases couldn’t let it go..
also it started because me and sude hate moonwater and are wolfstar ride or dies who like to make regulus suffer :/ so i hope ur not expecting loving and sweet moonwater
regulus studies abroad. im thinking france or berlin ?? he’s doing academic resesrch all throughout europe and just never returns home
he meets remus and they start working/studying together because they’re very academically compatible. remus thinks regulus is hot. regulus thinks remus is hot. so they start fucking. there’s never really any feelings involve buy like they do like each other and they are friends
sirius is coming to visit :/ and this is how it all started. as ive said before it physically pains me to ship either remus or sirius with anyone but each other so we were like How do people write them in other pairings and then go about introducing them in a platonic setting ???? like how is remus going to date regulus and then meet his brother and not fall in love with him
 no disrespect to moonwater shippers. i even see the potential. this is literally just a me problem
anyway. sirius is coming to visit for like a week. reg and sirius dont see each other that often. regs excited and sirius is excited ! but they’re also both worried and axious <3 bc they almost always end their visits on somewhat bad terms
reg and remus are working pretty closely together. i dont really know what they’re working on but i know they have to spend a lot of time together. so naturally reg invites remus to dinner with him and sirius. thinking remus can work as a bit of s buffer between them
sirius and remus meet and well. they fall in love in every universe i dont know what to tell you. it was written in the stars. remus thought he lucked out with the youngest black and now he meets the older black who’s so smart and sexy and rough around the edges and so very pretty and so very lovely and who looks delectable and who’s batting his eyelashes at remus without really meaning to. there’s just tension between them immediately. remus is so upset he didnt meet sirius first. sirius is upset because he can’t flirt with someone his brother is sleeping with
lots of late night conversations after regulus has fallen asleep. them meeting in the kitchen in the middle of the night. they’re thirsty or hungry or whatever. they’re smoking together. getting to know each other. always in the middle of the night. and they’re not really breaking any rules but they’re also not telling regulus about it so it feels like they’re breaking rules. neither of them want to name the reason why they cant let regulus know
sirius hates himself because that’s his little brother. he’s supposed to be better. he’s also supposed to want to be better. but he also resents him a bit. resents him for defending their parents. resents him for moving abroad. resents him for not taking his side. and he loves him more than anything but they come from a home where you had to fight cheat and steal to get things you wanted. and he wants remus but he loves regulus. but he already has regulus. he’ll always have regulus because regulus will always be his brother. a fate neither of them can escape. he’ll always love regulus because he can’t help it. he loves him when he hates him
they had to fight cheat and steal to get what they wanted but in addition to that they would also always have more than they ever needed. <- an excuse sirius uses to excuse his feelings for remus. regulus has his studies, friends, a life he likes, money, a nice flat and endless opportunities. he has more than he’ll ever need and sirius wants remus.
i also love this au because it’s such a character study of both black brothers and their nastier traits. how fucked up they are and how much they love each other but how being kind to each other doesn’t come naturally. how selfishness and greed is rooted in both of them
and! i love this au because its such an interesting remus study. how he’s also a bit fucked up and selfish and greedy. he knows he’s homewrecking a family but he just cant let sirius go. he’s not used to getting what he wants in life so when it’s presented he wont turn it down. a normal person would probably extract themselves from the situation but he DOESNT
^ because in no universe will sirius or remus ever be normal about each other. they’ll never not be completely unhinged about the other ever 
 and that is what i love about them.. they’d both do morally fucked up things to get to each other every single time. so remus can look past sirius fucking over his brother, and sirius can look past remus fucking over someone he was ’dating’
there were never any romantic feelings between regulus and remus and regulus is genuinely not that upset about losing him. its his brother. its all about his big brother and how he always gets what he wants. regulus couldnt care less about losing remus, but he’ll never forgive sirius. and that’s okay because there’s lots of things they’ll never forgive each other for. they still love each other because they cant help it. they’re the only ones who understand and that’s fine. they’ve done unforgivable things to each other but they’ll never hate each other more than they love each other. it all comes back to how deeply they understand each other no matter how often they wish they didn’t
so regulus doesn’t talk to sirius for a year and sirius doesn’t try to reach out. until one day sirius gets a phone call and remus has all but moved in with him at this point. sirius ends the call with ’okay, miss you, too’
who was that?
regulus
your brother?
no the other person i know called regulus
but? i—, shouldn’t he like hate you forever or something?
he’s my brother. he already hates me forever
END SCENE <3
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dragonagecompanions · 1 year ago
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Why do you think Varric made the Inquisitor a Comte? Wouldn’t that make them outrank him? Dumar seemed pretty powerless and I always thought that Varric got shoved in the rule to make him in charge of the recovery of Kirkwall but not actually of Kirkwall?
Sweet gentle anon, I know it was not your intention but you have stumbled into one of my favorite conversational topics and I hope you are ready for the fall out.
Welcome, children, to Fereldone talks about Thedas' Geo/Theopolitical bullshit!
(tl:dr at the bottom)
So, very important things to know going in: Kirkwall's political history is weird. Founded by the Tevinter Imperium in -620 Ancient (which is DA equivalent of BC/BCE, or the time before the ages ascribed to history by the chantry), it was a mining city. After a slave tried to kill the Archon the Magisterium decided they needed to start importing- and presumably breaking the will of- slaves farther from the heart of the imperium and thus the City of Chains gained purpose.
I could throw a lot of facts and names at you, but here's the basics-- it housed millions of slaves over hundreds of years, at the end of the ancient age they rebelled and overthrew it. Kirk means black in Alamarri, the stone they mined there was jet black, and so Kirkwall (black walls) becomes a Free city. It suffered during the fourth blight in the Exalted Age (fifth age, for those keeping score at home), was conquered by the Qunari in the Storm Age (seventh age) and was then conquered by the Orlesians. Orlais was on a roll with the whole 'we own everything whoops killed your ancestral leaders', but in the Blessed age (eighth age) the people retaliate and overthrow the empire to regain independence.
For reasons I can only assume are laziness and a desire not to change all the paperwork, the leader of Kirkwall is still referred to by the Orlesian word Viscount/Viscomte. Bear with me, this is important later.
We are now in the early dragon age (9th age, and when Inquisition happens). The first two rulers of free Kirkwall sucked. Basically they blockaded their own port and made people pay a fortune to get in and trade. This didn't sit well with the Chantry, who would much rather do that themselves, and in 9:14 Divine Beatrix II (later saved by Cassandra!) tells the Templars to strong arm him into submission talk some sense into the viscount.
The knight commander is killed in the exchange, and so his second command Meredith Stannard steps up to try her hand at negotiations. It goes poorly, so she arrests and jails the Viscount and essentially takes control of the city with full Chantry approval. Now the Templars are essentially in control of the city, and so they appoint a puppet leader (Dumar) to play act in control. But Meredith is actually in charge, and everyone knows it.
Including Elthina, who named her Knight Commander. This is why the Chantry never actually does anything about templar abuses.
So! If you are still with me, this is where Viscount becomes important. There are some wibbly bits about how you treat Sebastian Vael in DA2, but essentially Kirkwall decides that it's time to be an actual city state and not a poorly run Theocracy. As the only man with a plan (and the money and influence to do it), Varric steps in to help his home town. Ecstatic at not being responsible for that, the nobles (comtes) band together and put him in charge.
So while yes, in Orlais Viscount be beneath comte, Kirkwall has been so broken up and conquered and messed with over the years that names and titles are meaningless. In my personal opinion, Varric ennobles the inquisitor so that they will always have a staunch ally amongst the backbiting Kirkwaller nobles. It's also a nice and generous a decent thing to do, of course, but Varric is very good at making something do a lot of things for him all at once.
(Also, Varric knows exactly what that key does. He just ensured that someone smart enough and invested enough in peace will always be able to either open or close the harbor--making sure that the people who depend on him will be safe no matter what.)
Personally, the Trespasser epilouge is useless. It's the result of not having a head writer to review things, and the sweet but misguided attempt to give us closure if DA4 never happened. Hawke doesn't come back to Kirkwall. They are in Weisshaupt (if not in the Fade), and that plotIine will likely be in the final game. The Inquisition in whatever form it still has will be heading north, possibly with Kirkwall as an operating base, and this way the Inquisitor (who is confirmed to not be playabe in DA4) will have a reason to be there and not in Tevinter.
That's my read, anyway.
tl;dr Kirkwall has weird history that led to odd ways of organizing their nobility, Varric wants friends in places almost as high as him, shit's going down in the north and I think the inquisitor will be in Kirkwall so the writers needed a reason to put them there.
Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
Mod Fereldone
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coffeelovesdramasalatte · 2 years ago
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LITA Ep 1 rewatch thoughts
Taking it from the top! Why is Phayu literally the nicest person ever? Like he just saw someone's car stalling near the road in the rain and he just stopped to help? I love that this is their official intro to each other bc it gives us viewers a clear impression of their dynamic from the very beginning. The music selection in this scene is so funny though bc it's intense and dangerous and Phayu is literally just telling Rain to turn his hazard lights on lmao.
I also love that every time Phayu helps Rain, he does so with encouragement for Rain to be more self-sufficient. The tire-changing is example one.
"You're so handsome" RAIN pls control yourself... I mean we all agree and Phayu's already looking interested but danggg
Ah Sky, the long-suffering (affectionate) BFF. Did we ever find out when they met? Was it just in college or before, bc it looks like Sky's Rain-related-nonsense-tolerance meter is constantly maxed out and that usually comes from long-term friendships.
I LOVE HIM there is not a single thought behind these eyes
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Yassss department god Phayu for the win!! Love how this montage makes Phayu seem like a highly elegant and smart guy (which he is) but then we just watch him be a dork over Rain the rest of the series.
Fast forward a bit to the restaurant scene bc I forgot to keep typing...
Ok yeah sure you don't remember Rain, Phayu. Please, you made a beeline directly to him as soon as you walked in. Also, this scene makes my heart beat faster even though they do a lot more later on (where are those eyes looking, eh Phayu?).
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The next scene where Phayu wipes Rain's hair gives me mixed feelings bc on the one hand, I don't like how Rain literally had to hit Phayu with a pillow before he'd let go, but on the other I didn't actually get a sense of danger from Phayu. I also did like that Phayu threw out "actually I'm bisexual" so casually - love that for us. I also think it's hilarious how fast Rain falls into the "I'm so into Phayu" headspace. I've heard some people call it subspace and from what I know I'm inclined to agree but I don't know enough to comment on that further. Also here begins the saga of Rain having a death-grip on Phayu's neck during intimate moments. We stan <3
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Somehow I didn't notice the thermostat being set so low during every rewatch of this episode until now - I was always confused as to why Rain had to go under the covers but I get it.
When they wake up and Rain calls Phayu a bunch of names I couldn't stop laughing - it's even funnier when you know what's coming in the next few eps. Also my son really went "no thoughts head empty" after a single cheek kiss from Phayu. What a cutie
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Rain cursing at the storm is so cute!!! Also we love our logical bestie Sky as always.
I LOVE P'Aon!! Also he's the first person to call Rain Phayu's boy and for some reason I think that's v v cute
I accidentally paused and can't stop laughing at Phayu's face here PLSSSS
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And we've made it to the ending scene!! Ahhhh this makes me SO SOFT! I love it when characters tuck their face into their partner's neck when they're sleeping - there's something about the trust and comfort needed to do that which makes me so happy to see it play out. And Phayu's little "I'm really starting to like you, Rain" with the SOFTEST little smile on his face URGH I'M EXPERIENCING EMOTIONS
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This is one of my favorite opening episodes of a series! We got introduced to all the main players as well as the key side-characters, and we got a good understanding of who Rain and Phayu are as individuals (less so on Phayu's side for now) and their dynamic together. I was so hyped to finish the rest of the series as soon as I finished this episode the first time
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allamericanb-tch · 8 months ago
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crimson rivers thoughts (10) 
@tastetherainbow290
chapter 20
i’m scared for this chapter
my death predictions are vanity, peter, irene, and one of the death eaters (i can’t remember their names) (please let me be wrong please let me be wrong)
i’m only reading this one for now bc it’s “quick” according to the author
sirius pov! ok that’s good
ugh slughorn. die.
oh no the death eaters found peter
peter noooo omg. do not die right now.
they’re just. beating him to death. 
WHY DOES PETER ALWAYS BETRAY THEM IN EVERY FIC
james pov ahhhh dramatic irony
VANITY NO
and there goes willa
VESPA NO you will be missed
hodge no not vanity please
poor james oh my gosh
no vanity vanity no why no
tears
ok i need to be somewhere in 20 minutes this is horrible timing but i have to stop reading now
guys im back. it’s been like an hour i am not ready
“She never got her first kiss. She never got to fall in love. She never got to go home. Her prince never saved her. Her prince killed her. Her prince is dead.” SOBBING
why would you write this. i’m so serious rn WHY WOULD YOU WRITE THIS
peter saving regulus ❀
IRENE NO
why would you write this. 
ugh poor mathias. they didn’t mean to 💔
irene no what are you doing
MATHIAS TOO NO
JAMES NO what’s gonna happen i’m scared
i know james isn’t dead but regulus doesn’t and no one can tell him james is still alive ugh poor regulus 
sirius pov
yes sirius send regulus a secret message
rip juniper 💔 i know i would’ve been sad if we saw more of her
every time the death count shows at the end of the chapter i get so sad when i see evan’s name
chapter 21
maybe this one is happier?
ugh i hate slughorn
the two victor thing this is just like the hunger games (every time i say smth like this it’s like
 yeah
 that’s the whole point 😭)
sirius you’re so smart i love you
dorlene yay!! i love them even tho this is SAD
dorcas running FOUR MILES to see marlene 
i love them.
dorcassss tell her about the orderrrrr
“you’re a good friend” ❀‍đŸ©č
remus pov switch
regulus putting everything in the river ok
he’s keeping his own stuff that’s good
is regulus going to LEAP ACROSS THE RIVER
okay he didn’t. good.
run regulus run go find james
“It reminds Remus vaguely of dogs getting the zoomies” 😭
i lowkey forgot to be writing my thoughts down
“fancy a trip to space” sirius 😭
hanky panky time
MOON
AHHHHHHHH
why are they stopping 😯
oh poor sirius â˜č ugh i just feel so bad for him like. the way the hallow treated him was so unfair 
chapter 22
james pov!
james 💔
“happy birthday hodge” TEARS
eeee regulus is going to find james
james talking to regulus in his head
“regulus never fails to look up” 😭😭😭😭😭😭
poor james just out here suffering
james getting high off anesthesia 😭
come on regulus you can do it go find james
HE FOUND HIM!!!!!!!!!!!
james thinking regulus was sirius â˜č
regulus just going with it
the james pov of this 💔
not him trying to sell sirius about regulus’ “parting gift” 😭 i hope he does get to tell him eventually
he’s realizing
“you came and found me” “of course i did” AHHHHH
kiss kiss kiss
ok they’re hugging i love them
this is so sad but reunion!!!
sirius pov
joffery?! what is your offer
chapter 23
regulus telling james abt irene â˜č
why is this sad
they’re flirting
ope nevermind flirting over
regulus holding james ❀‍đŸ©č
i bet the audience is eating this up. which is kind of really sad. like. they’re having a moment and everyone’s just. watching.
SOUP 
they’re literally katniss and peeta in that one scene
“thank him” im just as confused as you are regulus
regulus feeding james (this is giving me the ick lowkey)
them talking about their relationship i hate that regulus is only doing this for the games
ugh i hate that james is being so james right now like. i want them to do this in peace and privacy and without the context of the games
“I used to collect brown rocks if they reminded me of your eyes” if someone did that for me i would cry
regulus telling james he was his first love
KISS ALREADY
i feel bad rn bc im like. the audience. intruding on their private moment. i know this is purely fiction but still. 
😯 they kissed
a sad kiss but a kiss nonetheless 
they’re kissing for real now eeeee
“That was one of the happiest moments of my life” â˜čâ˜čâ˜č
“now James knows that Regulus would kiss him in the pursuit of saving his life, if there literally was no other option” i am so sorry james
“peter wouldn’t betray me like that”
the tension rn (and not in a good way)
my sister is watching my favorite episode (s2 e13) of regular show rn im getting so distracted this is going to be my last chapter
“You can't protect me from this, because I'm already here” 💔
why is this SO SAD
“If there's one thing all of this has taught me it's that I've always cared” 
the end notes: “everyone: WHEN WILL THEY KISS??? me: be careful what you wish for” this feels targeted
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caffeiiine · 6 months ago
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OK HI SODA HI HI HI I HAD IDEAS FOR THE V3 REWRITE THAT I WANT TO SHARE (IDK IF U WANTED TO SEE THE GENIUS IDEA FOR THE REWRITE WITH THE OC BUT ILL SEND THIS AND THEN IF U WANNA SEE JUS TELL ME) ANYWAY !!!
ok i dont acgtually have too much but!! but but but i do have some ideas right
as of rn ive got two survivors (korekiyo, kokichi), a potential mastermind (miu?), chapter 3's first victim (kirumi), chapter 3's second blackened (korekiyo), and chapter 5's victim (rantaro). idk if this is good or not biut like !!!! ebehebh !!!!
miu being the mastermind is something i had for my own rewrite like with my oc but also i really like the idea, we could also have her do something with kiibo at some point like install a virus on him or wtvr that would make him kill someone? because she operates on him in the game anyway so having her do so and then have that fall into place later but like not give him time to say somethingabout it is really fun to me
kirumi i dont really have a reason for her being the first victim other than im a sucker for kirukiyo and i think he'd be pretty distressed that she died (im being very self indulgent here but we can change this if u want to, idk ur opinions on kirukiyo so !!! its up to u), we could also do something where the murders happened at almost the exact same time so he could have saved her if he had just been somewhere instead of trying to kill someone for his sister to have another "friend" in the afterlife
kokichi i want to live because i love him. end of explanation
rantaro i wanted to die at some point but not at the start, in part bc i love him but also because i think itd be really interesting if he was killed in ch 5 instead of kokichi because he has a lot of importance too, right? so i think a killing with him could be just as good, he could have helped the killer because he wanted them to try to find out the mastermind during his trial or something idk. still in speculation but i think it would be cool
as for like, protagonists and stuff, i have zero idea, but !!!!!! i think it would be super mega awesome to have both kaede and shuichi survive but also that is like not possible because kaede's death made shuichi actually be able to be good and smart at things and not feel bad IDK WE CAN FIGURE THIS OUT AT SOME POINT BUT HERES MY IDEAS SORRY THIS IS A LOT OF PARAGRAPHS
starting out i’m gonna be all over the place with this <33
first off: THE KIRUKIYO ISEA IS SO COOL THO honestly i never thought of that ship, and im not a huge shipper myself outside of bsd so im super neutral about most ships <33 so yeah!!!! we can ahve kirukiyo!!!! i like that!!!! :3 <- since you asked about my opinion on it
ALSO ARE YOU IN MY HEAD OR SOMETHING. MIU MASTERMIND!!! MIU MASTERMIND!!! or if not a mastermind, then in the very least a killer. i can’t tell you how many times i’ve ranted to my rl friends about how miu should’ve gotten to kill somebody. like ik in canon she was supposed to be the killer for 4 but that got swapped last minute but SHE SHOULDVE BEEN ALLOWED TO KILL SOMEBDIY and yes yes yes yes yes she should do something with kiibo that’d be very fun
YOURE SO CORRDCT ON RANTARO BTW his character generally suffers from the fact he was killed off way at the beginning, and ugshdh he could have done. so much. if he was left alive a little longer. i’ve said this before but that’s a common issue just in general with the type of game danganronpa is especially with the writers not adjusting the arcs for their allotted time which causes me PAIN. yeah leave him alive for longer for sure. and oooo i like rantaro, i think he could go either way being a killer or victim. especially if at the end of it all no matter how it goes down, hes wrong. whether he kills the wrong person, or if he’s caught in the middle of a planned murder and happens to be collateral damage/the mistaken victim while he’s trying to go after the mastermind and either way their only lead to the mastermind is now just gone
one of the things i do really like about v3 despite all my criticisms against it, is the fake-out protagonist. i’m not saying we have kaede die again or shuichi goes in her place, but i think it’d be cool to include something like that with one of the cast members? maybe kaito? idk im throwing things at the wall rn but basically im trying to figure out a way to have a character haunt the narrative like kaede did
yeah i ahev no clue about protags either yet, we can always just figure that out down the line sometime🎉🎉🎉
also side note but i propose to throw out the real fiction plotline or whatever it was called that v3 went down in the game, thoughts?
also also second unrelated side note: do we have to keep the 3 survivors? not like the literal characters, just the number. like obviously we wont have everyone survive, but idk let’s not confine ourselves to a number yet
for my input regarding cases: in no particular order/killer - ryoma -> victim/survivor ; himiko -> killer/victim [i think it’d be cool to have her as a killer but i’m not sure how she’d even go about it or even why] ; tenko -> victim ; tsumugi -> killer [i think her execution would be super interesting] aaaand i ahve yet to think about the rest
inout regarding survivors: idk i really want angie to survive and i am shooting you with shinounaga found family propaganda
anyways!!! give your opinion!!! sorry this took me forever to type!!!!!
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yes0another0outsiders0blog · 7 months ago
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Finally rereading The Outsiders like I said I would. I think I'll probably be doing a chapter a day, even though it's short enough that I could probably bust it out in one or two sittings. I'm really prone to burnout and I am trying to write a bit each day and I have a job to work and adult tasks to do and such, so a chapter sounds like a good goal with that considered.
Also, I'm sick as a fucking dog while reading this first chapter. Not relevant, just a little fun fact.
Anyway, have my thoughts while I read it!!
The Outsiders Reread : Chapter One Notes
less than a page in and I'm already tired of Ponyboy being Not Like The Other Girls
he's 14, that's positive, I should not be able to stomach a well-written 14 year old on account of them acting very 14, but also shut the fuck up
"yeah, I read books, unlike EVERYONE ELSE" go to hell
not to intentionally misread and water down a character, but Ponyboy saying "but sometimes I just don't use my head" is literally all you need to fucking know. that's it, that's the book
we get it, Pony, you come from a very hot family, yall are all conventionally attractive. paragraphs, ffs
also, I love that Soda doesn't drink. that he has a drunk on life attitude. could absolutely never be me, love that for him, unfortunately I fw Two-Bit's vibes with alcohol a bit more--
and the fact that Soda is the only one that can tease Darry.
there isn't a single positive thing said about Dallas besides "I didn't like him, but he was smart and you had to respect him." but frfr he's so great.
but if I met any of these fuckers irl Soda is the only one that I'd have a chance in hell at not hating. and that's only because he seems like he'd be enough of an emotionally/socially intelligent people-pleaser to actively try to get someone to like him, lol.
kinda salty about Johnny being called the gangs pet, wtf Ponyboy. not like he's one person's main reason to live, is SUCH fucking ride or die, later kills a man for Pony. but yeah, he's a pet. he tags along. what the fuck ever, man. if anything, Ponyboy (you know, the person that's mainly part of the gang bc he tags along with his older brothers, the BABY of the group, the quiet & sensitive one that doesn't have a single braincell outside of pure booksmarts) is the pet. like, sure, Johnny has trauma and is really quiet, but let's be so fr right now.
despite what is said in the book (bc it's Ponyboy's pov so we only get his perspective, obviously) I'm sure Darry gets after Soda too.
also, oldest children that become parental figures in some degree are allowed to be mean to their baby siblings. it's our right. as a 20-something year old with a young teen baby brother with common sense in the negatives, I am very biased in saying that Darry is always objectively 100% correct in every situation ever (heavily exaggerating, I just relate a lot).
forever mad that we don't get more Sylvia!!! my most random fav!!! so much love to her!!! she's basically an oc with how little we get of her and how many headcanons I have, I don't even really like the main fanon version of her either, but GOD she's my girl fr
NO BECAUSE WHEN I WAS 14 IF SOMEONE PULLED THEIR OWN KNIFE TO DO A DISSECTION THE WAY MY TONGUE WOULD BE DOWN THEIR THROAT. Ponyboy, babygirl, you did NOT deserve for that girl to hate on you like that. RUDE.
"Dallas deserves everything he gets, and should get worse, if you want the truth." agreed, that's my though process as I'm making the nastiest headcanons for him. my life's goal is to make this man suffer or make him into a loser, and all my hcs do both
breaks my heart so much how Ponyboy talks about Darry, leave my boy ALONE, dude!!!
my headcanons for Darry are usually the exact opposite of my hcs for Dally, I just want this guy to have the very best ong. I'll get so unrealistic with it too, bitch, YES I'll give you an absolutely stunning sugar mommy, babe!! just stop being stressed and stop having bad things happen for a few minutes!!! I almost struggle making in character, good headcanons for him because I just want to give him fluff and filler only and nothing else--
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justamarvelnerd · 2 years ago
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stuff i love (but mostly hate) about the IB:
Love:
- I’ve created a social identity with other IB students. (basically there’s a “we” in “we’re all suffering” as opposed to “i’m suffering”)
- the social identity is really honestly the greatest thing about the IB because I feel like we all think kind of the same, yk? we are all so stressed and scared but it’s kind of invigorating that we know we are all here together
- kind of related to that, I have some bragging rights about breaking through the IB fog after testing in May. I can say I did the hardest thing I’ve ever done, regardless of if I make good enough scores for sophomore status in college
- Colleges love IB students because hooray college prep give us all your money
- SMART CULTURE. I’m known as “that smart kid” in my family*
- conversations with IB students you can ONLY have with IB students. One time, my school put on a festival, and kids were running around playing, doing activities, having a good time yk. And within all this ruckus, a group of like ten students was standing out in the hallways laughing and arguing over what the correct chemical formula for cobaltic hydroxide was (COOH3 btw). that is a normal, everyday conversation at my school, and these people had to have been younger than me because i’m a senior and didn’t know them
- also, we’re all very tight knit. we kind of have to be. if you don’t leave before freshman year, or even up until junior year, you see so many of the kids around you dropping like flies to go to a normal comprehensive high school.** the size of my senior class as it stands right now is 72 people. i don’t know of anyone in my class that doesn’t know me by name.
- my teachers are WICKED smart.
- my handwriting has become phenomenal because all of our essays are handwritten.
Hate:
- even though it’s “we’re suffering”, it’s still yk. suffering. lmao it isn’t meant to be fun
- *being “that smart kid” means I feel like I’m being held to the standard that I’m meant to be smart and have all the answers all the time, and when I don’t, I feel like I’m failing at
 my identity? if that makes sense? makes me feel really, really crappy
- when sleep schedule is screwed, it’s screwed BIG TIME. there’s no happy medium.
- forget to eat in favor of study/ procrastination
- pretty sure those fainting spells were because of forgetting to drink water. whoops
- **i am the only African-American person in my entire grade. the only other Black person in class of ‘23 is Nigerian, and she happens to be one of my closest friends.
- it gets really lonely.
- sometimes, my teachers are so smart that what are basic concepts for them are incredibly complicated concepts for me, and when they skim right past them i can’t get my bearings
- long nights spent watching youtube videos on biology concepts could all be retrieved if my biology teacher had explained them better for me.
- THE IB IS NOT ADHD OR AUTISM-FRIENDLY AHHHHHHHHHHH. THE 504 PLAN HAS RUINED MY PERCEPTIONS OF WHATEVER “ACCOMMODATION” IS SUPPOSED TO MEAN.
- i find that schools in general are not very neurodivergent-friendly. a solution to lack of focus becomes sit in a quiet room by yourself with a ticking clock in the corner that you just can’t block out because it’s just So LOUD and this room is too bright and someone’s watching me from the corner of the room for some reason why do i need supervision i don’t even know what this assignment is asking me to do and i can’t even ask that random staff member watching me because that’s not their job and they aren’t my teacher bc he’s busy teaching all the rest of the class that can keep up with him.
- just no.
but anyway. i don’t know that i’d trade the experience I’ve had with the IB. Character development, yk? and i’m aware it isn’t for everyone.
idk what kind of person i’d be if i hadn’t decided to go through with attempting to get a full IB diploma. i wonder whether i would be as thoughtful as i am now.
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reidgraygubler · 4 years ago
Text
carolina (spencer reid/reader
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Title: Carolina
Request: no, but it was written for @spencerreidbingo​
Couple: spencer reid/fem!reader
Category: smut/angst, with a tiny bit of fluff
Content Warning: SEXUAL CONTENT (praise kink, mild-innocence kink, daddy kink, fingering, oral (male & female), penetrative sex, unprotected sex/cream pie, grinding/petting, hairpulling, breathplay, multiple orgasms, possessive kink, orgasm denial), partying, drinking, swearing, large age gap (between two consenting adults), professor/student, post prison!reid, quick mentions of drinks being drugged (but not actually happening) (if I missed anything, please let me know)
Word Count: 9,064
Summary: Spencer thinks his peer is innocent. But little does he not, she’s not as innocent as he thinks.
A/N: it’s based on carolina by harry styles, bc im a sucker for a good harry song. This was written for @spencerreidbingo​ (i’ll have a separate post with more about that). this takes up the breathplay square on my card (pictured below). This is also the first time im writing a blowjob scene, so im really sorry if it’s not good. i also didn’t have a beta for this, so im kinda blindly posting this. and, lastly, this is a lot longer than i intended. i didn’t mean for it to get this long
 it’s just a bunch of words my brain wouldn’t stop saying until i wrote it... i seriously hope you all enjoy this. thank you all for the love and support! check out my masterlist!
~*~* THIS DOES CONTAIN 18+ CONTENT!! *~*~
{***}{***}{***}
I kept my eyes low as I stepped into the lecture hall 5 minutes before anyone else. The professor was writing something on the chalkboard, so his back was facing the room. 
“Uh, hello,” I spoked, stepping closer to his desk. He jumped slightly and dropped his chalk at the sound of my voice. I would have expected him to know students would be showing up earlier, considering it was the start of a new semester. And, I honestly would have assumed he was told a new student was coming. That’s not my job. 
“Oh, sorry,” he turned around to face me. I smiled softly, watching
as he bent down to pick up the chalk. I cocked my head to the side, watching his backside as he stood back up. He pushed his hair away from his face. “You must be the new transfer,” he asked, resting the chalk on his desk, beside a pile of pens.
“Yep. That’s me
” I smiled, looking up at his face, keeping myself from further checking him out. I quickly offered my hand and gave him my name. “I know I’m early. I figured I’d get the syllabus from you now instead of after class,” I nodded as I adjusted my grip on my bag. He stared at me for a moment, his eyes lingering on my face and then down my body, and that moment felt like an eternity. I shouldn’t be mad or frustrated with him. I basically did the same thing to him moments ago.
 I cleared my throat to get his attention once again. “The, uh
 The syllabus?” I asked as my smile faltered slightly. He looked at me before looking at the pile of papers on his desk before quickly moving.
“Right, right, sorry,” he muttered as he began shuffling through the piles of paper on his desk. “Um, here you are,” he looked back up at me as he handed me a small packet. I looked at it for a moment before looking back up at the teacher.
“Perfect, thank you,” I spoke, my words kind of lingering because he never actually gave me his name. 
“Right, sorry, Spencer. Spencer Reid. I won’t be a drill sergeant about the whole Mr., Dr., Professor. You can call me whatever you want,” he smiled as he placed his hands on the back of his chair. I held back my laughter and the wildly inappropriate joke that I wanted to make.
“Well, Professor Reid,” I smiled as I looked down at my watch, “I better go find a seat before your class starts. I can’t wait to be in your class,” I looked up at him before turning to find a spot. When I sat down, Spencer looked at me with a smile, before going back to writing on the chalkboard. 
I quickly and quietly pulled out my books and pens as the other people in the class filed in and took their seats. Spencer quickly finished writing on the board before turning around to greet the class. And, even as he spoke to the class, and looked around at each of the other students, his eyes always landed on me, lingering for a moment before going elsewhere.
{***}{***}{***}
Five months. Five months into being in Spencer Reid’s class, and I have been suffering. I’m not a new student anymore. But the only friendship I’ve made is with my fucking professor, and there’s a certain level of tension between us. That tension was probably thanks to him staring at me during lectures, and me teasing him while he taught. It wasn’t too bothersome, but I definitely wanted something to happen. Unfortunately for me, I don’t think anything will happen. 
So, can someone please tell me why I invited Spencer over to help me study for a test? It’s a stupid question too, that I already figured out the answer to
 I even finished studying for the day, and I’m going to a stupid party. Maybe I could get him to go with
 And maybe, just maybe, something could happen.
I nearly jumped when there was a knock on the door. It’s not that I forgot he was coming over. It’s that I was so wrapped up in doing my makeup and forgot what time it was. My mascara almost smudged when I jumped back. Thank God it didn’t smudge too terribly. 
I grabbed my shirt off the counter and threw it on (not bothering to zip it), before running to the front door. I smoothed out my skirt before pulling the door open. And, there stood Spencer. 
“Hope I’m not too late,” he looked down at me and smiled. Although, his smile didn’t stay for too long when he saw what I was wearing. He wasn’t disappointed though, no. He was
 He clearly liked what he saw, I’ll just put it that way.
“Oh! Thanks for coming over, but I actually figured it out. I should’ve called you,” I looked up at Spencer as he stepped into my apartment. I struggled to zip the back of my blouse as I walked towards my room. I looked back over my shoulder and noted that Spencer was, indeed, still following me. “Can you zip me up,” I stopped in my tracks before giving up on zipping my blouse. It was a black crop top that paired well with the pale pink tennis skirt. 
“Where
 Where exactly are you going tonight? It’s a, uh, it’s a school night,” he asked as he lifted his hands. The cool metal of the zipper pressed against my back, causing a shiver to go through my spine.
“Uh, there’s this party,” I answered, stepping away from him and towards the bathroom, “Thought I’d go,” I looked at him in the mirror. Spencer looked around the bathroom, at the messy mess I had made on my counter. Different pallets of makeup and tools were strewn about, a varying amount of hair care products tossed here and there. It honestly looked like a bathroom of a pageant queen, and not a 20-something-year-old. In my defense, I had to dress to impress someone here in this stupid university. 
“Is that, uh
 Is that smart?” Spencer asked, leaning against the door jamb. I looked up at him as I put on some luxurious red lipstick. I smiled as I looked at him.
“I think it is,” I laughed as I picked up something else and turned to look at him, “You wanna come? I wasn’t invited,” I smiled wickedly as I looked at him. His face paled two shades as he looked at me. “Oh, c’mon, Professor, no one will know us there, and I can assure you, no one will even see us,” I looked up at him as I readjusted his tie. He looked down at me before swallowing roughly. 
“I don-”
“I do need a designated driver,” I spoke before cutting him off. I walked past him and towards my room. Part of me wondered what he was thinking as I so rudely rushed past him, or cut him off, or whatever I was doing. I wished I could hear his thoughts. I wondered if they consisted of “The mouth on that girl,” or, “I should punish her for the way she’s acting,” or, my personal favorite, “I should put that mouth to good use,” 
“How old are you again?” Spencer asked once I sat down on my bed. I looked up at him as I slipped my shoes on.
“22,” I smiled and stood up, “Why, is that important?” I smiled as I grabbed my coat and purse.
“Couldn’t remember,” he lied. We both knew he was lying. He even knew that too. Freaking walking computer is what he is. There's no way he conveniently forgot how old I was. “Are you going to be out late?”
“Why? It’s not like you’re my dad or anything?” I laughed, leading him back to the front door of the house. “I don’t plan on being out too late. I know there’s class tomorrow,” I shrugged as I walked towards his car. 
We both stayed silent as he drove with the directions I was quietly giving him. I was pleasantly happy that we were both quiet, but what I hated was the sudden awkward sexual tension that was between us. If he didn’t have this
 domineering personality over me there probably wouldn’t be this tension between us.
“Are you going to come with me?” I looked up at him as I unbuckled. He glanced over at me with slight disappointment in his eye. I felt a little bad, but I really wanted to go to this party, I wasn’t going to let my professor’s disappointment stop me. “Please,” I whispered. He sighed before unbuckling himself. I had to force myself to not verbally giggle with excitement before slipping out of the car. Spencer looked down at me as I twisted my hips to swish my skirt. I smiled as I entertained myself. I'm sure if I wasn't watching my skirt, I would have been staring at him, giving myself away. 
“Steps,” Spencer muttered as we got closer to the porch. I looked up at him before looking towards the small staircase. I looked up at Spencer with a smile. He glanced back down at me, a worried crease in his brow. I looked down at my skirt and smoothed it out. I looked at the door as we stood close to it, I contemplated knocking.
  “So, you weren’t invited to this party?” Spencer asked, looking down at me. His voice stopped me from knocking. Instead, I looked up at him and smiled back up at him. He raised an eyebrow as he waited for an answer from me. My smile grew playful as I looked back at the door, raising my fist to knock on it. “No answer?” he asked, still waiting for my answer.
“Oh, please, Professor Reid, I can get into the hottest parties in LA without an invitation,” I smiled at him. That was a little bit of an over-exaggeration. Most college parties I could get into. But not LA parties. Someday though
 
The door swung open, and we were instantly met with loud music blaring through a speaker somewhere in the house. People’s voices and chatter carried all throughout the house, coming through the various rooms and clusters around. “Are you coming in to babysit me? Or, are you going to go back to your car to read the science of the mathematical phenomenon,” I looked up at him, offering my hand to him. I wasn’t exactly sure if that was a real book or not, but I wouldn’t put it past Spencer to read. 
“I’m not babysitting you,” he corrected as he looked down at me with a disappointed look in his eye. I smiled and rolled my eyes. 
“Are you going to come in and watch me drink and party and have fun, Professor
 Or, are you going to go back to your car and read your silly little book,” I looked down at my hand, silently telling him to take my hand and come in with me. 
“I, uh, I don’t think it’s exactly in the rules for a professor to party, let alone drink, with their students,” Spencer spoke before looking down at my hand. I dropped my shoulders and looked up at him.
“Fine then
 Suit yourself,” I turned around and basically skipped into the house, leaving the door open for him. I made my way towards the loud kitchen and grabbed for a cup and bottle of whatever booze was nearby. I blindly grabbed for a bottle of Grey Goose and dumped it into the cup, no mixer, no chaser. 
“First off,” Spencer’s voice came from beside me. I looked up at him and took a long sip of vodka. “You shouldn’t be taking drinks from people at a party,” he spoke, taking the cup from me. I looked up at him, then the bottle and a new cup. I was only a little annoyed that he took my drink. 
“I
 I’m young. I’m not dumb,” I grabbed a new cup and poured more vodka. I looked up at him and offered him a sip. “I know not to drink something given to me by someone I don’t know.” I scoffed before taking another long sip. I cringed a bit at how strong it was.
“Even then someone could slip something into a drink! Even if you did know them!” Spencer exclaimed, causing the surrounding people to turn and look at us. I dropped my shoulders as I looked up at him. 
“If you look around, Spencer, you’re the only person that I know. So unless you’re the one slipping something into my drink
 And, as an FBI agent
 I don’t think you would,” I cocked my head to my shoulder. Spencer looked at me with a raised eyebrow. “You have more to say,” I added before taking a sip of my drink.
"And, secondly, you're not as innocent as I had originally thought you were," he watched as I brought the cup of straight vodka to my lips. He looked rather unamused with my talent for drinking straight vodka.
"You thought I was innocent?" I asked, nearly sputtering the liquid with my laughter. "Please! I've never been innocent in my entire life!" I shouted over the music. He raised an eyebrow at my statement, and suddenly I had the greatest idea in the world. "But maybe, just for you, I'll be a good girl," I smiled before drinking the rest of my drink in one go. Spencer looked down at me, his lips pressed into a fine as he stared down at me. Ohh, that definitely awoken something in him. I bit back my smile with my offer. Innocent
 He thinks I’m innocent. Ha! I honestly don’t remember the last time I was innocent. And, honestly, just for him
 I’d be an innocent, good, little girl for Spencer Reid any day, every day even. “I can be your good, innocent little girl,” I smiled at him and cocked my head.
"I don't
 I don't think that'd be
 appropriate," he spoke, his words very quiet. We both knew that even though it was inappropriate, we both wanted it. We both knew what we wanted to. 
I glanced at him before pouring more drink for myself. "You should learn to pace yourself," he stated and changed the subject. He nervously looked at the bottle of vodka and then around the room at all the other people drinking. Or, he was just looking for a drink that wasn’t booze. Did he actually want to keep me safe, or was I just overreading him?     
"It's a college party, Professor! I'm not going to pace myself!" I shouted just to get his attention back to me. His head shot back down to me. The level of concern on his face only made me feel a little bad, mostly because he was concerned for me. But, he should know
 This is a college party.  “Do you want some?” I asked, offering my drink to him again. I held it up to him, close to his lips. His face twisted up as soon as the scent of pure vodka hit his nose.
“No, no thanks,” he held up at hand to block the cup from his face. I pouted before bringing it to my lips. “Do you usually come to parties,” he asked, his eyes darting around the room. Part of me wondered if he wanted to continue that question with “Like this?” But,  I was too busy keeping my eyes on his face, rather than looking around the room like he was. Although, I’m sure he was used to keeping an eye on his surroundings. I’ve never been too worried about it, I probably should
 But hey, you only live once. Going to college parties with your 38-year-old professor, and drinking straight vodka, and not really caring about your surroundings proves my point of YOLO.
“If I don’t have class or anything to study for
 Yep,” I looked up at him with a sneaky smile. The joke with that was his particular class had a test coming up soon, and I should be studying for it. He knew that too because he just announced the test this morning. Although, he did come to my home, to help me with said test. “But, I wouldn't show up to his class hungover. It’d disappoint him too much. And, he’d care too much about me to even focus on the rest of the class,” I spoke, answering the questions he was thinking. It’s not like I’ve shown up to classes hungover before. Granted, I’ve never shown up to his class drunk or hungover. Mostly because I didn’t want to disappoint him, and only him. Anyone and everyone else can go blow themselves.
“How do you know that?” Spencer asked, looking back at me with furrowed eyebrows. I smiled and stepped closer to him.  
“How do I know what?” I cocked my head to my shoulder. I already knew what he meant by his question, but
 I think teasing him and messing with him is fun. And, he knew that too.
“How do you know that you’d disappoint him?” he looked down at me, pressing his chin to his chest to get a better look at me. His hands were away from me, even though I really wanted his hands anywhere on me. I looked over at my hand and the cup I held before bringing it to my lips. I took a long sip, trying to finish the contents in one go. I tossed the cup over my shoulder and looked up at him with a lazy smile.
“Because being hungover, with the slight possibility of still being drunk, would totally disappoint him
 And I would hate to disappoint him.” I whispered and shook my head. Spencer looked down at me with something in his eyes, and I loved the way he looked at me. “I told you, Professor, I’d be a good girl for you,” I cocked my head to my shoulder and smiled, “And only for you,”
“You’re drunk,” he pointed out an obvious fake statement. So, I cackled and shook my head.
“I had one drink,” I scoffed and waved off my in the air, “Most definitely not enough to get me drunk,” I flattened his tie out before gripping it tightly, “Like I said, I wouldn’t want to disappoint you,” I smiled before dropping my hand from his tie, “So, why would I show up to your class
 Hungover
? I know you’d care
 And I know it’d disappoint you. That’s the last thing I want to do to you,”  
Spencer’s adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed roughly. He quickly looked between me and the room, then back at me, then around the room. I faked a yawn before looking away from him.
“I’m gonna go to the bathroom, okay, Professor?” I smoothed out his jacket before turning and leaving him alone in the kitchen. I smiled as I skipped away from him, my skirt swishing with my movement. I secretly hoped he’d follow me. But, a quick glance over my shoulder told me he was still in the kitchen.
However, when I finished my business and left the bathroom, Spencer was leaning against the wall right beside the door. I looked up at him and smiled. 
“Follow me,” he muttered, grasping my wrist and pulling me down the various halls and past multiple groups of people. I giggled the harder his grasp grew on me and the faster he moved. I’m happy people were too busy with themselves to notice a 30-something-year-old man was dragging a 20-something-year-old girl down the hall, to which I can assume was one of the only open bedrooms. Fuck
 I hope it's a bedroom. 
He was a man on a mission. Not letting anyone get in his way. The smile that grew on my lips was pure excitement. I couldn’t help it. I’m sure we’re both getting what we wanted
 I hope.
I let out an excited yelp when he shoved me into, exactly what I thought, an empty bedroom. I’m surprised he knew that there’d be an empty room. Most of them are occupied, with couples (or more) doing exactly what I hope we’re about to do. Which was fuck each other.
Spencer slammed the door shut, and quickly locked it before pushing me against it. I looked up at him and giggled like a fucking kid in a candy store. Again, I couldn’t help it. 
Spencer was quiet, which led me to be quiet. The air in between us quickly grew hot and tense and thick. I really wanted this to move faster, but I wanted him to be the one in charge. I was willing to let this be slow and let him be in charge. So, when he grabbed both my wrists and held them above my head, I smiled so hard my cheeks began to hurt.
“Tell me what you want,” Spencer’s voice was low and deep as he moved close to me. There was little to no space between us. Which left little to the imagination, for me anyway. 
I looked up at him, with the biggest doe eyes I could muster, silently telling him that I wanted the most, in the entire world, was to be on my knees, with his hand tangled in my hair, and his cock down my throat, or to be fucked so hard that I won’t be able to sit properly for several days. But, I couldn’t be that blunt. You gotta play up to that moment before you get it. I’m sure in the end though, I’ll get both things.
I swallowed roughly, trying to think of what to say, because, like I said, I can’t just be blunt yet. So, when I opened my mouth and words just came out, I was pleasantly surprised with what was said. “You’re old enough to be my father, Professor,” I smiled at him as he pinned me against the door. He pressed his hips against mine to keep me against the surface. I could feel a large bulge against my inner thigh, causing me to shiver. “Does that mean I get to call you daddy,” I whispered as I looked up at him through my eyelashes. He is the one who said I could call him whatever I wanted
 And he did just ask me what I wanted, and I guess I wanted to call him ‘Daddy’. There was no guessing about him.
Okay, he wasn't exactly old enough to be my father. But he was a lot older than me. Most 20-something-year-olds aren't sleeping with men 15 years older than them
 and most 20-something-year-olds aren't sleeping with their professor
 I just wanted an excuse to call him 'Daddy'. And he knew that too. So, if we gave each other an excuse for that to happen, then that was all I needed.
I dropped my head to my shoulder to allow him to attack the space on my neck. He dragged his nose across my jawbone before stilling. His lips were just over my neck. As his breathing got heavier, it tickled across my skin. 
“That does have a nice ring to it,” Spencer hummed as he dropped my hands and stepped away from me. I swallowed roughly as I stared at him. I missed having his body pressed against mine, and he knew that. 
I looked at him as I brought my hands to his belt. "I thought you said this wasn't appropriate, Daddy," I whispered as I quickly undid the belt buckle, without looking. I almost couldn’t move fast enough to unbutton and zip his pants. If he wanted me to stop, he would have stopped me by now. “Can I?” I looked up at him, a plea in my eyes.
"You've changed my mind," he muttered, watching me with such close intent, “God, please keep going,” he spoke like if I did stop now he’d probably die. I looked up at him as I slipped my hand into the waistband of his boxers. He hissed as my fingers brushed against his cock. A small smile grew on my lips. 
“Didn’t take much convincing,” I smiled as my fingers wrapped around him. A small groan fell from his lips as I looked up at him. When I pulled my hand away from him not even a moment later, he looked down at me with an alarmed expression on his face. I quickly spat on my palm before sticking my hand down his pants. “Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted this?” I whispered as I slowly stroked up and down his length. I couldn’t believe it was actually happening. 
“I’ve wanted this since you stepped foot in my classroom,” his voice was low and gravely as he spoke. My breathing picked up a little bit as I looked up at him. 
Okay
 Maybe he did know how long I’ve wanted this. Because I also wanted this the second I stepped into his lecture hall. I wanted his cock in my hands and his hand around my throat. It only took-what, five months for this? I’ll make it worth the wait. 
“Does that feel good,” I whispered, carefully picking up speed and adding the slightest bit of pressure in my grip. Spencer’s eyes fluttered shut as he swallowed roughly and nodded. I smiled before pulling my hand away from him, again. I slowly lowered to my knees and kept my eyes on his face. 
Spencer looked down at him as he gently pushed his fingers through my hair. His fingers gripping hard on my roots before pulling hard. I smiled before very slowly pulling down his slacks and boxers in one go. I was only a little bit intimidated by his size, but the excitement I felt went straight to my core. 
I took a deep breath and swallowed roughly before looking up at him. My mouth fell open, and my tongue stuck out, silently telling him that it was okay. Although I don’t really know why I was telling him that it was okay, we both knew what we wanted, and it was only going to take me doing one thing.
I made eye contact with him as I ran my tongue on the side of his cock. Our eye contact didn’t last long, mostly because he let out a moan and dropped his head back. I smiled as I licked across his tip. A sweet and salty taste was on my tongue. 
My jaw fell slack as I carefully took his length into my mouth. I closed my lips around him before slowly bobbing my head, with my tongue swirling around the underside of his cock. I wrapped a hand around what wouldn’t fit into my mouth. And wrapped my free arm around his leg for support.
The sounds of his moans and grunts filled the mostly quiet room. Music, although muffled through the walls and door, could still be heard from outside of our own world behind the door and four walls.
“You were right,” he struggled to speak through groans, “You aren’t as innocent as I thought,” Spencer's hand had a rough hold in my hair as he held me against him. His cock was penetrating my throat, and breathing was beginning to get difficult. My eyes grew wet and tears grew in the corners of my eyes. 
“You’re such a good girl,” he looked down at me as the tears started to roll down my cheeks. I wouldn’t be surprised if my makeup started smudging and I looked like an adolescent raccoon. “You look so pretty with my cock down your throat,” he struggled to let out a coo, before moving his hips closer to my face. 
Everything about this moment, his hand in my hair, the sounds he was making, the way he smelled, being here
 Was intoxicating. I’d give anything to be in this moment again. And I’d give anything to get this moment sooner.
 My knees would hate me in the morning, I just know it. I could already sense the dreaded carpet burn before he even started. But, in all honesty, it’d be worth it. Walking into class tomorrow morning, with bruises and day-old wounds on my knees, just to see his expression.
As I began to pick up pace, the sounds Spencer was making started to become more urgent, easily telling me he was close. But, before he could finish, I pulled away from him, crashing into the wall to get away from his grasp. He looked down at me with a mild frustration on his face. I smiled before wiping my chin clean of spit. 
“I guess chivalry is dead. Whatever happened to ladies first?” I asked, my voice a rasp from how raw my throat was. I looked up at him, feeling a certain level of sass grow in my smile. Spencer quickly tucked himself back into his pants before grabbing my hand. 
“Come on, on your feet,” he muttered as he pulled me back up to a standing position. I nearly toppled over into him if he didn’t hold me upright. I looked up at him and smiled. 
“Bed
 Now?” I whispered, my tone showing how urgent I was. It’s not that I wanted this over with, it's that I wanted everything to happen to me all at once, and I wanted it to last for a long time. 
Spencer nodded before cupping my face in his hands. He was harsh when he pressed his lips to mine, like his life depended on it, if he did kiss me now the world would end. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he started guiding me towards the bed. And when the edge of the bed hit the back of my legs, he pushed me back onto it. I quickly moved so my head was resting on the pillows. Spencer was quick to take his cardigan off and be over me. 
“You’re not going to fail me, are you,” I joked as he quickly started leaving wet, open-mouthed kisses on my neck. He lifted his head and looked down at me with confusion on his face. “If I’m a bad fuck,”
“If you ask that again, or bring up class while we’re doing this
 Then yes,” he muttered as he looked at me. I laughed as I pushed my fingers through his hair. 
“Oh, shut up,” I laughed as I pulled him down to kiss him, again. One of his hands landed on top of my breast, carefully kneading it, causing me to moan into his mouth. 
His hand slowly drifted away from my chest. I pressed my head into the pillow and looked up at him with a smirk. He carefully dragged his fingers up from my chest to the base of my neck, causing me to let out a shaky gasp. I wanted fingers and a hand around my neck, carefully cutting off my airway just right. Suddenly, I never wanted something so badly in my life. Something dark flashed in his eyes as he looked down at me like he knew what I was about to say. 
“Do it
 I fucking dare you,” I muttered, placing both my hands around his wrist. My nose twitched as I stared at him. “I said fucking do it,” I spat, pushing his hand down more onto my neck. My words slowly got cut off as the pressure in his hand and fingers tightened around my neck. A moan struggled to escape me, but did eventually fall from my lips. He seemed pretty happy with that.
“Is that good,” his voice was a growl. I looked at him and moaned.
“Harder,” I begged, my voice growing raspier the more I spoke. He smirked before allowing his grip to tighten. His other hand was still sitting on top of my hips, and I could tell where he wanted to put it. I’d be a dirty, rotten liar if I didn’t want his hand up my skirt. In fact, I’d love it if he did more than just his hand. 
Spencer swallowed roughly before finally sneaking a hand up my skirt and resting it on my underwear. My grip around his wrist got tighter as he pushed past my underwear and past my folds. My eyes fluttered closed as another moan was strangled in my throat. 
“You’re so wet,” he purred as he slowly moved a finger around my clit. I looked up at him, as I struggled to swallow roughly. A dark smirk grew on his lips as he watched me struggle for a moment. “Does that feel good,” he asked, mildly mocking me from earlier. His movements picked up speed just a little bit, and my body reacted, well tried to react. 
“Oh, you’re such a good girl,” he looked down at me. His pupils were so blown I could nearly see my reflection in them. “Another thing you were right about,” he whispered as he slipped a finger into my entrance, and curled it just right. My vision slowly blurred before my eyes rolled into the back of my head. Another moan struggled to escape my throat as Spencer added a second finger. 
My body was on autopilot as I lifted my hand and hit his wrist a few times, telling him that I desperately needed to breathe. When I reopened my eyes, I looked up at him a moment before he removed his hand from my neck. Worry and concern flashed in his eyes as I breathed. Air burned like fire in my lungs as I took a deep breath. As I exhaled a loud moan followed behind, easily telling Spencer and I that I had reached my first orgasm of the night. I just hope there will be more... 
“You did such a good job, Princess,” Spencer whispered as he looked down at me. With his free hand, he brushed the tears away from my cheeks. He carefully withdrew his hand from between my legs and held them up to his face. He looked at them for a moment before placing them in his mouth, sucking and licking them clean. I took a shaky breath and nodded. 
He very sloppily pressed his lips to mine, then on the corner of my lips, and down my jaw, and neck. With one quick movement, a loud rip filled the room, as he tore my shirt off my body. I looked up at him with shock in my eyes. To be fair, that shirt was flimsy, to begin with. I was more worried about leaving my chest so exposed as we left the party. 
“Oh, I’ll give you my sweater,” Spencer muttered before attacking my neck and then down to my collarbones, and over my breasts. I gasped as he wrapped his lips around a nipple.
“Mmm, Daddy,” I whimpered as I shifted under him. I brought my hands back up to his hair, tangling my fingers in the hairs on his neck. When he sensed that I was growing restless (even though he just started), he quickly left wet kisses down the rest of my body
“I like the way that sounds coming from your mouth,” he whispered once he was in between my legs. I looked down at him just as he looked up at me. “Good on your end for wearing such a short skirt,” he smiled before pressing his lips to my inner thigh. A shaky breath tumbled from my lips as I looked at him. “Makes for easier access,” he added before going higher up on my leg.
“You’re not going fast enough,” I whined as he just kept kissing, or licking, or rubbing my inner thighs. It was honestly getting annoying. I kind of felt bad for him. Considering I’ve already cum once, and I got him close but didn’t let him finish. 
“I’m not going fast enough?” Spencer looked up at me. I shot him a scowl as I shifted slightly on the bed. Spencer looked back down the apex of my legs before looping two fingers around the band of my underwear. As soon as I lifted my hips, he pulled my underwear off my body and chucked them to the ground beside the bed. “How’s this for fast enough,” he muttered, mostly to himself, before licking between my folds. A breath of air got caught in my lungs as my hands found their way to his hair, my fingers getting knotted up in his roots. 
“Mhm, Spencer,” I gasped, rolling my hips up at him. He hummed, sending vibrations straight to my core. My legs wrapped around him, my heels digging into his back as my own back arched. 
“Ohh, Daddy, please don’t stop,” I cried, pressing my head into the pillow beneath my head. My fingers pulled hard on his hair, pulling him closer to me. He hummed again as he pushed two fingers back into my entrance. My grip in his hair tightened, and I could feel my grip wanting to loosen. 
My breathing picked up as a familiar feeling grew in my stomach. And all I could say was his name, and the suddenly loved nickname I had for him. He seemed to appreciate my reaction too, because he worked faster. Messy and wet sounds, mixed with my breathy moans and calls of his name filled the room, and my end was near. 
“Fuck,” I shouted as I finally came undone. I could sense if I didn’t pull him away, he’d keep going, and going till I couldn’t take it anymore. And, honestly, that sounds great, but I think that’s for next time. I wanted him in me now. “Spencer, Spencer,” I cried as I tried to pull his head away, but failed so hard.
“Nuh huh,” he hummed, looking up at me. I took a deep breath and pressed my head into the pillow beneath me and threw an arm over my face. “Please, Spencer,” I cried as I bucked my hips at him, “Fuck me, please, fuck me, Daddy,” I moaned. He was going faster than before and was clearly trying to work me to the end faster too. It was hard to breathe, and speak because my words would just get stuck in my throat.  
Although, when I did cum, again, for the third time tonight, Spencer did move away from my legs. He knelt between them, wiping his chin with the back of his hand. My body was shaking lightly as I tried to come down from my high.
“Please,” I whispered, lifting a hand up, trying to reach for his tie. He looked down at me with a smile and raised an eyebrow.
“Please what?”
“Please, Daddy,” I furrowed my eyebrows as I spoke. I could feel my voice becoming a little whiney. Spencer moved so he was hovering over me, his fingers gently brushing hair away from my face.
“Tell me what you want, Princess,” he whispered cupping my face in his hand. I looked up at his face, admiring his lips, and eyes, and nose, and the way his lips had a sheen from when he licked them clean and whatever was leftover from when he was eating me out. 
“Please fuck me, Daddy,” I begged, begged. Spencer smiled before pressing his lips to mine for a moment. He sat up away from me to remove his sweater and shirt. My head was spinning from excitement, I didn’t even notice that he was totally undressed.
Spencer was back between my legs, looking down at me like I truly belonged right here. Or, like I was his to fuck with. Either way it was a good feeling. 
“Ready?” He asked, his voice so low that I could hardly hear it over the bass of the loud music. I rapidly nodded my head, worried my answer was the wrong one. But it wasn’t. I desperately wanted this. Needed. I needed this. 
Spencer hovered over me before putting an opened mouth kiss on my lips. I could hardly breathe as he rubbed the tip of his cock against my clit and entrance. I could feel a moan getting caught in the middle of my throat, my body not being about to handle anymore teasing. Until, he very slowly pushed into me.
“Oh, good girl,” he repeated. Those two words, constantly coming off his tongue. Making me feel good. The praise that I hadn’t heard in such a long time, that I longed for. Part of me wondered if he knew I wanted it. “Has someone not been taking care of you?” he asked, looking down at me. I stared at him, not trusting my own voice. My mind was too distracted with the way I felt, light and airy but at the same time full. So I shook my head.
“No, Daddy,” I whimpered and kept shaking my head. Spencer smiled before pressing his lips to mine. 
“Don’t worry, I’ve got you now. I’ll take care of you,” he mumbled before moving his hips. It took him a moment to get a perfect rhythm. He lips attached to different spots on my neck, leaving hickies in his wake.
“Spencer,” I whispered as I moved my head closer to my shoulder to let him have more space.
“You feel so good,” he grunted as he moved his hips so he was deeper in me, “You feel so good, and you’re all mine,” he pressed his forehead to mine as he wrapped his arms around my lower back, pulling me closer up to him. My breathing got deep, my chest heaving with each breath I took. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down, closer to my face. 
“Oh, be quiet,” I whispered before putting my lips on his. He smiled before passing his tongue between my lips. A moan fell from my lips, which he seemed to enjoy
 Considering it was probably just music to his ears. 
“I’ll only be quiet if you keep making those little noises,” he muttered against my lips. I opened my eyes and looked up at him. He smiled again as I knotted my fingers in the hair on the back of his head. 
“Faster,” I breathed out, keeping my eyes on him. Spencer laughed lightly as he picked up the speed. My hips bucked with his, meeting at the right points. “Please,” I whimpered as I threw my head back more into the pillow. He pulled his arm away from my back and brought his hand between our legs, where we met. 
“It’s okay, Little Girl,” Spencer whispered before pressing his lips to the side of my face. I let out a shaky breah and arched my body into his. I couldn’t believe how good I felt. I almost wasn’t sure if it was fair that my professor was better in bed than other men my age. He was more experienced, to be fair. “You can finish, it’s okay,” he kept his voice low. It almost sounded like he was giving me permission.
I nodded my head, breathing heavily through my nose. “Mmm, Spencer,” I moaned, loudy, as my walls fluttered around him and my release came. And a few moments later, Spencer thrusted deep into me with a grunt, filling me with his essence. His body collapsed on top of me whence he finished.
“Fuck,” I muttered, my fingers still tangled in his hair. My limbs were sore and shaking slightly from the rough movements. Spencer laughed lightly, agreeing with my statement. “We can’t sleep here,” I whispered, keeping my eyes on the ceiling above us. I wished we could just sleep here, mostly because I was exhausted after everything we did.
“I know,” Spencer replied as he slowly moved off and away from me. I looked up at him with wide eyes. “You’re messy now,” he muttered as he basically tumbled off the bed. I quickly sat up, just to make sure he was okay. Although I was happy he was okay, I quickly regretted moving as fast as I did. 
“Your sweater,” I mumbled, reaching out towards where his sweater was lying. He looked down at it before picking it up to hand to me. He also grabbed a fistful of tissues and moved to between my legs, again. “Just give me your boxers,” I looked at him as he wiped the insides of my thighs clean. He looked back up at me, still cleaning my legs. 
“I’ll give you a ride home,” he spoke as he tossed the dirty tissues to the trash. He grabbed his slacks and boxers, tossing me his boxers. I slipped them on under my skirt, and then slipped his sweater on. 
“I’d hope so,” I whispered as I stood up. My body wobbled for a second, nearly falling over, before I caught my balance. Spencer looked back at me, looking at how fucked I looked. I mean, I probably looked about the same as him. 
“I’d given you a ride home either way,” he said as he redressed. I looked at him with confusion on my face. Either way? So even if we hadn’t had sex, he would have given me a ride. I asked him and he said yes. So I would hope he’d given me a ride, even if we didn’t fuck.
Once we were both ready to leave this stupid party, that I didn’t even enjoy (well, I did, I was just in a different world), or was even invited to, we walked out. It was as easy as pie. And, since no one really knew either of us were here, I won’t be known as the girl who fucked the professor.
The drive home was quiet. Like, even quieter than the drive here. He didn’t even have the music playing. I wondered if it was my fault, if he was regretting what we had done. If I had known he’d be so regretful, I wouldn’t have wanted to fuck him. But, I guess its too late now. 
When I looked out the window, I realized we were parked outside my apartment building. I looked down at my attire and looked back at Spencer.
“Thanks
 Thanks for the ride
 And thanks for the sweater. I’ll be sure to give it back to you
 Eventually,” I looked up at Spencer as I pulled the door open to leave.
“See you Thursday,” he nodded at me. I looked at him before slamming the door shut. I scoffed before turning to walk up to my home. I couldn’t want to sleep.
{***}{***}{***}
Two weeks. Two weeks since Spencer and I fucked. Okay, not too bad. I don’t regret it, and I’m not afraid to say that. However, I think he might be regretting it. Considering he’d been nothing but ignoring me since the night of the par-Well, I wouldn’t say ignoring me since then. He did fuck me in his office the following Thursday. But, it’s still been two weeks since he last said anything to me. Fuck, I’ve never been so mad.
“Good morning, Professor Reid,” I looked at him as I skipped into his lecture hall. I heard his words begin to greet me back, but fail when he saw what I was wearing. “Best get to my seat. Excited for today’s lesson,” I readjusted the cardigan that hung off my shoulders before turning to go to my seat. 
I could feel his eyes burning into the back of my skull as I walked away from him. Or, was he staring at my ass. Most likely my ass. It was my ass he was staring at. I was wearing a fairly short skirt, so that’s on me. But, I’d do anything to get his attention today. And it would appear I have gotten it. 
His lesson wasn’t actually anything important. It was just revision for the test coming up soon. But, it was obvious he had other things on his mind, and I was very clearly one of them. It was honestly a little distracting if I’m going to be honest.
So, I was happy when he called the end of class 5 minutes early. Although that excitement was gone the second he called my name to the front to talk. I looked at the ground as I stood by his desk, waiting for the very last person to leave so Spencer and I could have our moment alone.
“What are you doing wearing that?” Spencer asked as soon as it was just us. I tried to ignore the fact that he was trying to take the sweater off me, and made my shoulders drop.
“What? This old thing?” I asked, pulling the cardigan that he let me wear around my body. I looked back at him and smiled. He was not smiling. “You gave it to me,” I scoffed, letting him take it off me without a fight. I watched as he folded it over the back of the chair before turning to face me. 
“I gave it to you so your,” his words began to get jumbled up as he gestured to my boobs, “So you weren’t exposed in front of any-”
“So no one would see what belonged to you?” I asked, folding my arms over my chest. Spencer looked down at me, a flabbergasted look on his face. I smiled and cocked my head to my shoulder.
“I
 I never said that,” Spencer shook his head.
“Yeah, but you thought it,” I scoffed and rolled my eyes. Spencer looked down at me. I could tell that he was trying to be the one in charge, kinda like how he was the other night. But it was so, so clear that he couldn’t be in charge. That he wouldn’t be in charge now. That this was just embarrassing to him. Maybe that’s just how our dynamic would work. Out in public, I was the loud one, the one who made everyone think that I was in charge in the bedroom. And, Spencer, in public, was the quiet, shy, nervous one, who was clearly submissive in bed. But in actuality, he was telling me what to do, when and when I can’t cum.
 “Why were you wearing that?” he asked again, his voice pulling me from my very dirty thoughts. I looked up at him and smiled.
“Because you were ignoring me! I needed to get your attention somehow! And then I remembered I still had that,” I smiled at him. I wished I still had his sweater on, because it was actually quite cozy and warm. The look he gave me made me drop my shoulders, suddenly feeling ashamed about the current situation. So, I stared at him, feeling annoyed. More annoyed than I have over the last two weeks. “Do you regret it?” I finally asked, not really knowing if he’d be mad with my question. 
“Pardon me?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked at me. I shook my head and looked down at the ground. “It’s not that I regret it-”
“So you do,” I looked back up at him and dropped my shoulders again. Before Spencer got the chance to say anything, I cut him off, “Oh please, you loved shoving your tongue, and cock, down my throat,” I scoffed before looking at him. The expression on his face flinched slightly as he looked back at me from behind the desk. “I get to
 I get to be your good, little girl, your princess for, what, a week? A day? 12 hours? Whenever the fuck you want... And I’m supposed to go back to normal life the next day? And
 And pretend that nothing happened!” I stared at him and shook my head. Spencer looked over at the door and back at me. “Thinking it’ll never happen again!” I shouted. I didn’t mean to shout, honest. But I was starting to get angry. He made me feel something like I belonged to someone. And now I don’t feel like that. 
“Will you stop talking for a second,” he muttered before stepping away from me and his desk. He walked over to the door and shut it. I crossed my arms over my chest and watched as he walked back over to me. “I never said you had to pretend as if nothing happened. And I never said that I regret it,” he spoke in a harsh whisper. I looked at him with mild irritation on my face.
“It sure fucking felt like it,” I spat at him. 
“You’re all I think about
 Christ, I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell you that. I never said you had to forget everything
 Because I’ve been having a hard time forgetting it myself.” He looked up at me. I almost refused to look at him, but his voice was so soft that I had to look at him. “I never expected you to forget,” he added. 
“Then why are you acting like it didn’t happen,” I stared at him before swallowing roughly, “You made me feel like I was wanted, that I belonged somewhere, with someone,” I spoke as I stepped closer to him. It was only a little bit closer to him, not as much as I wanted. But he stepped closer to me, making it so we were the closest we had been all day, in one large step. "You remind me of home," I added in a whisper. Spencer smiled and cocked his head to his shoulder.
“You do belong somewhere,” he whispered, resting his hands on my shoulders. I looked up at him, feeling my heart pick up speed, and butterflies appear in my tummy. “And that somewhere is with me,” he brought at hand to my cheek, allowing his thumb to rest on my lower lip. I looked up at him before he pressed his lips to mine. 
I was honestly expecting him to say something else. I don’t know what. But I liked what he said, it made me feel really good. Like, I belonged with him, and nothing could change that.
taglist: @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto​, @thebluetint​
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remcycl333 · 2 years ago
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You and your old SP were living in different countries? I read in a previous ask that you manifested him transferring and that's impressive. My SP and I are currently studying in different countries, we met online during quarantine. I manifested meeting him because my clown ass wanted a boyfriend and I thought well, everyone is quarantined right now, so I might as well get to meet people from other countries online. He's everything I ever wanted in a partner, I wouldn't change a thing about him, but I have held myself back from manifesting him as my boyfriend??? I can handle distance, actually I think distance can be a good thing because I don't really like to be with people 24/7. I seriously don't see myself dating someone and seeing them every single day or every week. I really like my alone space, so seeing someone only once a year (or none at all lol) doesn't sound like a problem to me. I consider myself very good at communication and I know how to create and keep a bond with people without seeing them often. But I feel egotistical for wanting to drag him into my narrative because from what I've read, people in LDRs suffer a lot and most don't end in good terms. He seems to be interested and it makes me wonder why, if he could easily get a local girl. He's super hot and sweet, talented, smart, anyone would be lucky and he seems to have a very active social life so there are no excuses, and my boy is wasting his time texting me saying he's the lucky one for finding me ? wtf boy ??? Go be lucky with someone in person idk. And although I don't really believe in astrology, I do think it's fun and I was curious about his birth chart and something very interesting that I found is that people with his venus sign tend to seek relationships with people that they can't see on a regular basis, usually in different countries than theirs and I mean, what a lovely coincidence. I could conveniently decide that astrology is totally right on this one HA! So, everything seems to be in my favor but I'm still hesitant about it. This was messy and I'm sorry I came to vent, but today I woke up thinking it's better to drop him and just stay friends and the thought really hurt me.
my old sp and i both lived in the US but he lived in a different state that was across the country from mine, about 1,600 miles away! and i manifested he’d stop going to college in that state and instead go to college about 20 mins from međŸ€
after reading your ask, i feel like the two of you can definitely give it a shot!! if he it still acting that way towards you (saying he’s lucky to find you, etc) then he obviously knows you’ll have to do a LDR and he seems okay with the fact!! also the thing you said about his venus sign blew my mind!
you can always manifest you two have a happy, healthy, fulfilling relationship despite the distance. and if you eventually decide you want to close the distance, you can manifest that as well! or if you want to break up bc it’s too hard, you can manifest he takes it perfectly well and the breakup is mutual!!
but this relationship sounds like it’s going well so far to me, and if the thought of just being friends really saddens you then i’d definitely say enter a relationship with him!! it doesn’t have to be forever, it could just be something fun you try!!
keep me updated on what you choose and how things progress!! đŸ€đŸ€
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tommybaholland · 4 years ago
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may I have some hcs for how noya, suga, suna, and maybe??? tsuki (I didn't see him in your list of characters you currently write for, so I wasn't sure if you would write for him if I requested him, so I understand if you don't) react to their s/o who's in a sports team (in high school if possible unless you prefer to age them up I understand!) too (I'm not specifying/choosing so other readers can feel included!) injuring their knee during practice, but not taking it seriously and they just limp around everywhere instead of going to the doctor or trying to do something to feel better. I went too hard on badminton practice yesterday and I literally cannot bend, or put weight on my knee right now so I'm just limping around cause I'm too scared to ask my mom if she can take me to the hospital sjjjdjshs. Don't be like me plsđŸ§â€â™€ïžas someone who's injured several muscles over 2 times I am begging to take this seriously if you ever get injured, I hope you're taking care of yourself!! :))
when their s/o tries to hide an injury
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featuring: nishinoya, sugawara, and suna
yes, unfortunately, i don’t write for tsukki right now, but here are the other three :) i’ll let the writing do the talking, but take it easy and i hope you feel better soon! 
nishinoya
he’s probably the least observant and that doesn’t mean he can’t take a hint when something’s wrong with you
but he usually doesn’t find out about it until after something happens 
you two have quite the playful relationship and are no strangers to playing fighting or jumping onto each other
one day at school, he snuck up behind you to hop onto your back as he often did 
and normally you wouldn’t mind and can handle it because he’s as light as a feather 
but today your back didn’t take it so well as you let out a strained gasped at feeling his weight put pressure onto it 
“hey, my beautiful, sweet, gorgeous-- hey, are you okay? did i hurt you?”
you knew you were going to have to have this conversation with him eventually but of course, you were too late
you wince as you try to stand up straight again, explaining that your back was already hurting from practice
“oh, well, then you should probably go see the nurse. can’t have you hurting, gorgeous.”
you promise him that it’s okay and you probably just need to stretch it out later
he hesitantly accepts your answer, but worries about you all-day long
it makes him usually quiet 
so he decides that he can’t let you tolerate your pain
on your way to the gym after school for practice, you find him waiting outside 
“you can’t practice today, babe.”
you actually get a little annoyed at him for trying to tell you what you can and can’t do
“oh, you’re fine? okay, then-- oops, i dropped my pen. can you pick it up for me? it’s closer to you.”
you knew where this was going 
but your back said otherwise and you barely hinged forward before it felt like someone was literally stabbing you in the back
“see? you can barely bend over. i’m taking you to the nurse or a doctor or something so you can get better.”
he grabs your hand and starts leading you away when you stop and ask him about your practice and volleyball
“i talked to the coach before you got here and they agree with me. i can miss one day of practice. the rest of them would probably do the same for their s/o and besides most of them still suck at receiving so they can practice that and serving at the same time!”
you still don’t look convinced so he brings you closer to him by tugging lightly on the bottom of your school uniform
“don’t worry, beautiful. i got it all sorted out, okay?” 
you finally nod and he seals his promise with a small kiss 
“listen, you’re my strong, beautiful, gorgeous, smart s/o and i love you! i’ll try to pay more attention to you but i need you to let me know when you’re hurting..”
he couldn’t let you get away with a small scolding bc his oblivious ass loves you too much 
sugawara
he observes but tries not to make a big deal out of it or bring it up in a confrontational way 
you had a slight limp on the way to school and on the way home with him after both of your practices finished
he invited you over to hang out for a bit before your curfew and he notices that you struggled a little to sit down next to him on his bed like you were in pain
“sugar, are you alright?” he asked, his hand rubbing across your back
you tell him you’re fine
“okay...are you sure? i’m pretty sure you’ve been limping this entire day and just now it looked like it hurt to sit down.”
you admit that your hip has been bothering you ever since practice the day before and you thought it would just get better over time 
“well, how bad is the pain?”
it’s not too bad, you think
he has you lay down and he tries to examine you a bit himself
“does it hurt when i lift your leg like this?”
he slowly tries to lift it to a ninety-degree angle but a sharp pain shoots right into your hip 
you wince and tense up at the pain 
he frowns as he immediately puts your leg down, “it’s only your hip, right? your knee doesn’t hurt or anything?”
you shake your head, still tense from the pain that it’s causing you 
he lays down next to you, rubbing a soothing hand up and down you arm, “aww, i’m sorry it hurts so much, sweetness, but-- wait, you didn’t go to practice like this did you?  
well, the karma was certainly hitting
he sighs, “babe, why would you-- never mind, i think you need to go see the doctor.”
that’s when the tears start to fall
he pulls you into his arms upon seeing your tears, “i know you don’t wanna go, sweetheart, but you need to get this checked out. i just hate seeing you in so much pain and they can help you feel better.” 
you hate the doctor
it just makes you just feel like more of a helpless burden 
“you’re not a burden, sugar. this looks serious and you shouldn’t be in so much pain. i don’t think we should let it go any longer so let’s get you bundled up in some of my sweatpants and that one sweater you like. i’ll take you and be there for you the entire time, okay?” 
gives you a few reassuring kisses and lets you lay there with him for a bit longer before you get ready to go
he would never let his sweet s/o suffer and always stays true to his word 
and you bet that he’ll be there when you’re confined to bed rest, making sure you’re not overexerting yourself so he can see your beautiful smile again
suna
he’s the most observant out of these three and won’t hesitate to ask about it
he didn’t see you much during the day at school but he walked you home almost every day after practice and usually ended up staying for dinner
so he always had that to look forward to
he was surprised when he got a glance of you outside the gym earlier than normal 
and he really got curious when he saw how off-balanced and wobbly you seemed
you waited outside for him, not wanting to interrupt practice 
you had skipped your own practice that day, seeing that nobody knew you had hurt your knee 
but you knew suna would find out eventually so you were just trying to figure out what to tell him 
“hey, so when were you going to tell me that you’re hurt?”
he was so quiet and stealthy that you didn’t even notice him standing there with all his stuff, ready to leave for the day
he was never less than confrontational
“and don’t try to hide it from me, babe. i can see the limp in your step.”
your knee has been hurting since practice the other day and it wasn’t getting any better
“i see. have you tried icing it or anything?”
the habitual blank expression in his face had turned downward as you shook your head
“baby, how many times do i have to tell you? you can’t just let things like this go. it’s not good for you.” 
you tell him not to tell your parents or make you go to the doctor because it doesn’t hurt that bad
“of course. i can’t make you do anything, but let’s at least try putting some ice on it and elevating it first, okay?” 
you agree and then he tries to pick you up, insisting on carrying you all the way home 
“babe, i can do it. i’ve got a strong core, remember?”
you’re still refusing him like, ‘pls chill, i’m not dying’
“okay, but hold onto me when you need. and here, do you want to wear this? it’s a bit cold out.”
he gives you his team jacket to wear 
you begin walking and you realize you’re more unsteady than you thought
he wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you into his side, and has you wrap an arm around his shoulders so he can steady you a little more
once you get to his house, he gets you all set up in his bed with ice and your leg propped up on a few pillows 
then he makes sure you’re all cozy with plenty of blankets and him snuggled up beside you
he doesn’t look like it but he loves to dote on you even when you’re being stubborn <3
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hold on haikyuu night!! there’s more if you want to request..
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dashuisofanubis · 3 years ago
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Got any fic recs? đŸ„ș💕
Definitely! I warn you, this is going to be long bc there are so many good fics out there
rugged heart by The Sushi Monster
And that's when it hits Eddie that is something new and different; ensemble. (Post-"The Touchstone of Ra")
I love this one so much, its wonderful and I think about it a lot
You Give Me Feelings That I Adore by crocs
Interestingly, when KT and Nina meet for the first time, the world is not ending. (NinaKT. Post-S3.)
Short, but very sweet
A bona fide mystery by marshmallownose
“With this Circle of Light, I seal the Circle of Life,” she said, trying to fit the pieces together only for them to topple and fall apart. “With this Circle of Light, I seal the Circle of Life,” Nina said again, voice pitching in desperation. Nothing. She whirled around to face them, green eyes glassy with frustration. “Why isn’t it working?"
No spoilers, but this one is fun to think about
(Baby) it's cold outside by DietS0daS0ciety
In which Patricia Williamson will never back down from a (snowball) fight.
The Anubis kids have a snowball fight! What more could you want
Fairytale of Amun York by crocs
'Nina — Might be a good idea to attend this,' it read. 'Seems like something you might be into!' A crudely drawn smiley face followed the message. It still smelled vaguely of scented perma-marker. Nina leant in. Apple-scented perma-marker.' (NinaFabian. Post-Series.)
I love this one very much
Coffee, decaf by sleepymarvel
Nobody had ever called her smart before. She’d been called a bitch, a troublemaker occasionally, suicidally brave once, there was the time Alfie called her a scheming pixie and she thought that was pretty funny, but nobody had ever told her she was smart.
A really cool piece looking at early s1 Patricia's thoughts on Rufus. I recommend the rest of the fics in this series too!
In the house of yesteryear by marshmallownose
every tragedy has a beginning and an end, but the moments in the middle are often forgotten whether they be bitter or sweet.
this is a moment in time.
Sarah, Victor and Rufus as teenagers!
The Heist by mask_of_anubis
It's Prospective Parents' Day once again and the Anubis students couldn't be less excited. But when Mr. Sweet decides to place the Frobisher Shield under lockdown for safe keeping, the kids set out on the ultimate parents' day mission: a heist to reclaim the shield and win eternal glory. Takes place after the end of season 2 before the school term ends.
This one is so much fun I adore it
Family ties by HouseofSecrets
Evelyn Meridian Martin’s life was one of joy and suffering. Haunted by dreams of a girl she has never met in a house she has never seen, Evelyn searches for answers and unearths long buried secrets.
Backstory for Nina’s grandmother!
Trixie by daddyoshie
Where did the nickname "Trixie" come from? And why do only Alfie and Jerome use it? Until now, Patricia has never told anyone the story behind the name.
Or: The story of the time that Alfie and Jerome went out of their way for Patricia and forged a strong bond of friendship in the process.
This one is very fun and very sweet! (also one of the tags is 'no beta we crash and burn like a Jerome moneymaking scheme' and I think that's wonderful)
Tears of Gold by HouseofSecrets
After finding out about her father and the secrets Mara and Jerome had been keeping from her, Poppy calls in reinforcements. Meanwhile the Sibunas race against time to find the Mask of Anubis.
Okay I am nowhere near as far through this as I should be, but it is incredible and I definitely recommend it!
it's called "therapy," and we all need it. by ironicsopsychotic
one thing leads to another, and—because it’s anubis house—they decide it’s only fair to get victor a therapist. for all their sakes as well as his.
A chaotic, very fun text fic
Two is Company by marshmallownose
When Eddie and his sister Kira were invited by their estranged father to attend the esteemed Amun Academic Boarding School in the United Kingdom, they were unaware of exactly what they were getting into.
What if Eddie had a twin sister? Honestly check out all of marshmallownose/@incorrectsibunaquotes' works, they're all wonderful. Speaking of, what would this list be if I didn't include...
House of Mistakes by marshmallownose
'Eddie knew better. He really did! But he needed to vent to someone, and Denby was willing to listen. And so he let it out right then and there. And she’d been so understanding, so supportive
so overly sweet.
Maybe that’s why Eddie felt like such a chump.'
Sinner Eddie AU! Sinner Eddie AU!
Finally I have to recommend this because of the pure chaos that went down when we created it
Getting Caught in the Rain (Down in Africa) by the Sibuna Lives discord
A group trip to Germany should be simple.
Here is a list of things not considered simple:
- Mick getting on the wrong plane
- Jerome following him
- Joy finding them stranded in South Africa
- Fabian getting kidnapped
- No one answering his distress calls
- Alfie calling a SWAT team to save him
Mick: Hey Joy, if you like pina coladas
Mick: or getting caught in the rain
Mick: I forgot the rest
Joy: Oh you old romantic you
Oh and I'm going to rec myself here bc I'm still proud of this fic
Making Excuses (or 5 times Eddie and Patricia got chores and 1 time they didn't) by Whispers_of_Gallifrey
Alternatively titled: 6 times Victor got a migraine
It was all subjective really. Maybe they had been miscreants launching a deliberate and malicious attack against Victor’s prize dahlias, or maybe they had just been having fun playing catch when the competitive streak kicked in and the flowers were unfortunately caught in the cross-fire. If he hadn’t wanted his flowers to become a casualty, maybe he shouldn’t have planted them there.
Tragically, Victor didn’t see it their way, so Patricia and Eddie were once again stuck doing chores for the foreseeable future.
There you go! If you got to the end of this congratulations because I think I went overboard (though there are far more I could have recced there's so many good fics out there!)
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phantaloon-books · 4 years ago
Text
I was rereading the iconic reunion at baltimore and this came to me and I can't not write it (even though I have a half finished chapter waiting to be written for a fic for a whole different fandom but who cares right)
in which neil regrets realizes that the feds were on to something when they talked about witness protection program. brace yourselves, it's angst time bby. please bear with me, I don't write stuff like this, content and format wise.
so everyone knows what goes down in baltimore. everyone knows that famous college exy striker for the foxes neil josten has been the son of the butcher of baltimore all along, and that smth happened after he was kidnapped and tortured that resulted in the butcher and some associates to be killed. everyone knows that neil walked out alive, injured but alive. so when a few weeks, months later, associates of the butcher start getting raided and taken in custody, everyone knows exactly who opened his little mouth and revealed everything he knows (bc there's literally no one else who could know this stuff and would be willing to share with the fucking feds, no one has a death wish)
It's a slow process. It starts with the feeling of not being safe, which is ridiculous, because he hasn't been quite as safe as he is right now, with the foxes, his family, and most importantly with Andrew. They're on summer break, technically speaking, even if they're at campus for practice because they gotta train the new foxes. They're barely doing anything than hanging out together and training, but still Neil can't shake the feeling that something is wrong, that someone is watching him, but he doesn't say anything, because it doesn't make sense, he's just being paranoid, there's no need to panic.
Neil can swear he's being watched. He feels the dread whenever he's out of the dorm, when he's out running, when they go out to eat something, when they go to the mall, on their way to practice, at Eden's. But when he looks around there's no one looking, it's been weeks and nothing has happened, he hasn't seen anyone.
Neil can tell Andrew is growing suspicious of the way he checks out a place, the way his eyes trace every corner, every exit, because he's starting to fall back in old habits, and he knows Andrew hates it. But Andrew doesn't ask, he knows that Neil will speak when he feels ready, so he lets it go, even if he can't quite let got of the worry clawing at his heart.
But everything keeps going normally, things are fine, everything is fine fine fine. Neil doesn't talk about it, but it's fine really. Until it's not fine at all, but it's also too late to talk now because his head is fuzzy and throbbing, and he feels like he might throw up and he feels pain even if he's not sure where the pain is coming from. But he can't do anything now, he can't tell Andrew how he's been feeling dread for weeks, because a man whose name he doesn't even know but whose face is awfully familiar is standing right in front of him where he lies on the floor, and the situation is also awfully familiar.
Stop being a martyr. Oh Andrew would kill him. If Neil gets out of this alive, Andrew will kill him, because he left again. He didn't want to, he really didn't. He was out on a run while Andrew was in therapy with Bee and Aaron, a couple miles away from fox tower, when a car pulled up right in front of him, two men wearing hoods and sunglasses stepping out and standing in front of him. He came to a halt, trying his best to keep calm because who the hell were these men and what did they want and for fucks sake can this just stop? It would have been smart to turn around and try to get back to the tower but he can't ever keep his mouth shut can he?
"Look I don't know who you are, I don't care what you want, but you're in my way, so move away if you know what's best." He intended to go for more sarcastic, but he was doing his best not to panic, so that had to do.
"You're coming with us, get in the car, or we'll do this the hard way." Their voices said they wouldn't hesitate, but Neil laughed anyway, that smile he knew was the Butcher's resting on his lips. Anything to make the men leave. He opened his mouth and then- "The Minyard twins are at Dr. Dobson's office. Reynolds, Walker, and Wilds are at the mall. Hemmick, Boyd and Day are in the dorms. The newbies are at the dorms as well. Come with us the easy way and we'll let them walk out of their respective places alive, Nathaniel."
And he was fucked. Of course he hadn't been safe, he would never be safe. In fact no one he cared about would ever be safe. He should have known better. But he wasn't going to let the foxes be harmed.
"How do I know you won't kill them anyway?" The snark was gone, the smile vanished. His face was blank and dangerous, because he'd done this before. "I don't even know who you are, you're obviously not the big guys, and I don't remember seeing your faces."
"We don't want to attract unnecessary attention. All we care about is you. If you come, you spare us all the trouble. As for who we are, let's just say someone is pissed at the piece of shit that ruined everything."
"The Butcher's friends then. I can't argue with that, it's a habit of mine to fuck up. Ichirou won't be too happy if something happened." He played his strongest card but fuck it. The Moriyamas owed him protection, Ichirou himself had made a deal with him.
"The moment they turned their backs to the Wesninski and made a deal with Hatford, those Japanese shits mean nothing to us." These were desperate men apparently. If the Moriyamas were nothing, the FBI was even less. "Time is running Nathaniel, decide. You or them?"
Andrew would kill him, but they'd talked about it before. Neil had told Andrew. If it means losing you, then no. He would not put himself first. Hell, he'd told the others before, the Foxes were all he had, he wasn't going to risk them for himself, not for anything. He needed to keep them safe.
So now he's lying on the cold wooden floor of some house or shed or whatever, drowsy from whatever they drugged him with once he got in the car, and in pain after being beaten for the last hour or so. He didn't bother asking the man (who is obviously in charge and sent the two men) for a name, and honestly he still doesn't plan to. What was the point of that anyway? He just looks up at the cold brown eyes of the man standing over him, Neil's face as neutral as he could keep it despite the fear of not making it out alive threatening to pull him under. The man just stares at him, calculative eyes and cruel smile, and Neil can't take it.
"What, so you're just gonna stand there? I have better shit to do." He hears the slur in his voice, wonders if it's just the drugs or something else. A concussion is likely. He's met with silence, so he closes his eyes and lays his head down. Fuck he's tired of these situations. He truly will never be safe, no one will-
"You know, I was expecting so much more from you Nathaniel," the man says with a laugh, "I was told that you'd put up a fight, I thought this would be fun. They said you'd beg for your precious life, but you haven't even made an effort."
Whoever his source was, they definitely do not know Neil, or Nathaniel for that matter. Not only is he not going to risk the men hurting the others, but he isn't going to fight, not against so many of them, not when running would be more likely to get him out alive. He isn't going to let them know that. "First go fuck yourself, and second, this isn't remotely close to entertaining to what I've been through, maybe if it was more interesting."
What does Andrew say? Regret is worthless? It seems right, because he can't find regret in what he said, even if his face is a bloody mess (what's new?) and his body shakes with shivers, after his head is held underwater so many times. No, he doesn't regret it. Instead he finds himself laughing a hollow thing.
"Y'know at least others have had a point, this time it's just for the fun of it, and it's not being much fun." His voice cracks a couple times, hoarse from coughing up water.
"You're right though, it is for fun. You cost me absolutely everything Nathaniel. Did you know the feds and the Moriyamas have been after us for months? Hunting us like we're rabbits, all because you decided to be a dipshit and open your mouth. You should be dead. You should have died ten years ago, back in March, anytime. All your existence caused us is trouble. And ratting us to the feds wasn't enough was it? No you told Ichirou all of the Butcher's men were loose ends, too." The man took a deep breath, composing himself. "So yes Nathaniel, this is for fun. This is payback, you've cost many lives, this is retribution for speaking, and I'm gonna enjoy seeing you have fun for as long as I can."
At some point, after hours, he's left alone in the dark, in the cold. He knows he’s in pain. He’s pretty sure his arm is broken, and so are several ribs. He knows he should be in a lot of pain, but he's just numb. Regret is worthless. Because even if he feels even worse than how he felt last winter at Evermore, he doesn’t regret it. He can’t be sure the guy’s men were truly going to kill the Foxes, but he doesn’t regret coming here to make sure the others don’t suffer more than they already have because of him. He wonders if Andrew will forgive him. He didn’t leave proof that he didn’t want to leave this time. Would Andrew think he left them - him? God, he hopes not. Would Andrew look for Neil or leave it thinking that Neil wanted to leave?
It doesn’t really matter, though. Neil is so tired. This time isn’t like when he was on the run or when he went to Evermore or when Lola took him. While with the Ravens, Kevin knew he was there at least, if anything were to happen, a person would know where to look somehow. At Baltimore, several people knew the most likely place to find him; Uncle Stewart, the Hatfords, Kevin again. He has no idea of where he is, or who took him, and no one knows he’s been taken in the first place. No one will ever find him.
Maybe it’s better that way, he thinks. No one will have to deal with the burden of him or his disappearance or his death, because no one will know. The simple thing would be to assume he ran. He hopes they assume he ran. Maybe they’ll be hurt, but haven’t they been expecting him to run? They won’t make it to championships without him considering Jack is an awful striker, but Kevin will manage. Andrew - Andrew is the one who expects him to run the most, maybe he’ll take it nicely. Neil hopes he takes it nicely. Guilt blossoms among the nothingness in his chest, but he can’t take it back, and he doesn’t want to. It’s better this way. No one will find him, but that’s fine. He wonders what the Moriyamas will do. He doesn’t want to think about that. He thinks of Andrew, the kisses, the care, the love, the nights spent together. Thank you, you were amazing. He wishes he could tell him how much he cares one last time. He feels something wet slip down his face. He can’t tell if it’s water, blood or tears. He sighs. He thinks of Andrew, and his eyes slip close.
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