#and now im trying to think if theres anything else im missing but i think those are the biggest players in this one

[pigeons-with-jello]

okay the Spiral and the Eye both are good options here because hes LITERALLY being watched by millions of people every single day. He does go crazy sort of, with everything he ever has known being an illusion though, so the Spiral has us there. Really, I think it could go either way, or possibly both as Fears do canonically work together for a good meal.

Guys what entity do we think Truman Burbank would be an avatar of

I’m thinking Spiral

Do we agree

[visenyaism]

jaehaerys administration dashboard simulator

🫧maidenpooled Follow

listen i know all kingsguard are bastards but jonquil darke put a cigarette out on me. i think i huave shivers

♟️redwhine

ok bootlicker. you know what she did

🫧maidenpooled Follow

boots not the only thing id lick

🌸queencrowned Follow

this could literally be me and my brother if it weren't for my bitch mom trying to send me to the other side of the fucking continent

🍒saerious

GIRL STAND UP

🤎bowlofbrown

doctrine of exceptionalism meatriders when someone asks them why 75% of dragonstone is blonde and me and half of flea bottom have gleaming amethyst eyes and/or beautiful delicate cheekbones

🥀maegorwife Follow

that's different...targaryens are literally divinely ordained by the seven to rule because they're stronger and better than us...that's why they have the dragons it is in their sanctified valyrian blood

🩸knifeinthedark

SO TRUE...THEY WANT TO ABOLISH THE RIGHT TO FIRST NIGHT BECAUSE OF WOKE. AND YET THEY STILL DO IT. BUT NO ONE CAN SAY ANYTHING ANYMORE OR THOSE GENDER-NEUTRAL DRAGONS WILL BURN YOUR KEEP DOWN

🤎bowlofbrown

cannot stand this fucking website. spending my last silver stag on tyroshi blue hair dye im not going to be associated with you people.

🍒saerious

oh so when maegor has seven wives he’s “aegon’s true son” and “cool” but when i have three boyfriends suddenly im a “whore”

🫀lustywench Follow

op i support you but they did call him “the cruel” for that it was a very important part of the story that he was in fact maegor “the cruel”

🌟sevenpointedstar

🌗maidensgrace

doing all of this with a FAITH OF THE SEVEN URL...girl you better pick a hell and start hoping

#bring back the faith militant

❄️theythemderly

hey isn’t it weird that so many of the king’s children have suddenly and mysteriously died lately. under the care of the maesters. what if they’re planning something…,

🕯️glasscandled

ugh i wish🙄 speed that shit up fr

🥵ullerscorpion

likes charge reblog cast

😈themarcherrrrrr-deactivated5699

me when im in a being dead combination and my opponents are jaehaerys' whole army of childraeyn of the corn

🙌fleabottomtop

yoooooooo theyre quarrelling again.

🙌fleabottomtop

alysanne targaryen if you're reading this i could change your life just give me one chance let me hit

🙌fleabottomtop

there are gold cloaks outside of my house

⚔️errantmaid Follow

kingsguard dick is good as fuck when you don't have a motherfucker in your ear saying it violates a sacred vow made in the eyes of the king and the seven😜

⚔️errantmaid Follow

the king chopped it off and sent him to the wall i fucking hate this place can't have SHIT in king's landing

🏵️floriansjonquil

hey has anyone seen princess gael. it's been literal months and she seems to have up and disappeared with no official announcement from the palace? would be the third female relative to go missing in the king's custody after aerea and saera....

🐝beeeeeeeeeeeeesbury Follow

damn that's crazy. im sure shes fine though anyways i'm a big fan of this new road the king built theres a lot of nice new roads does anyone else like the roads

🐦‍⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow

day 18262 of not fighting the brackens. this is boring as fuckkkkk what am i supposed to do. pretend to care about the triarchy?

🐎brackennation

kill yourself

🐦‍⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow

192.158.1.38. doxxed. get your dumbfuck horse breeder knights ready because our strongest and noblest raven warriors are on the way to your nasty ass keep right now bitch

[stevie-petey]

blurb idea? stug isn't having sex yet obviously but maybe dustin walks into bug's room while they're lying really close on her bed reading together and he flips his shit like OH MY EYES and they're like ...boy we're literally just sitting here. and steve's over for dinner and dustin refuses to look at him and claudia's like ok what's up and you're like literally nothing he's so dumb

i love dramatic dustin with stug so YES !!

enjoy <3

"so jo just rejects laurie? like, flat out, brutally rejects his marriage proposal after years of being best friends and basically already in love?"

"i mean, there are some nuances youre missing, but yeah. basically."

"what kind of sick book is this?" steve shoves the book away from him in disdain. his nose is scrunched up, offended, and you refrain from kissing it all better.

you fix a piece of hair thats fallen in his face as he lays next to you on your bed. "jo and laurie are tragic, i'll admit." your words are rough from reading for hours. steve always insists that you read the books for him, he claims youre better at it, but you know its because he loves the sound of your voice. "but its what makes the book so wonderful, dont you think?"

steve rolls his eyes at you. "your obsession with tragic romances concerns me. what, are you going to reject my proposal next? make me beg on my hands and knees for you?"

"technically you already did beg on your hands and knees for me-"

"wait, you didnt say youd accept my proposal."

with a sly laugh you clear your throat and bring the book back up to your face, continuing to read. steve stares at you as you read the heartbreaking words aloud, his eyes travel the length of your neck and the slope of your nose. the scene youre reading breaks his heart more than hed care to admit. youve been reading little women to steve for a few weeks now. he really thought itd be jo and laurie in the end.

lost in the way you voice lilts between jos soft rejection and lauries broken pleads, neither you nor steve hear dustin calling for you until its too late.

the boy barges into your room and nearly shrieks his head off when he realizes steve is in bed with you. "my eyes!" he cowers to close the door, covering his face with his grubby little hands.

"dustin!" you shout at him, throwing a pillow at him to shut up him. hes being dramatic, you and steve werent even doing anything. your boyfriend is lying next to you while you read him a long and horrendous breakup scene from a classic book. if anything, the two of you should be doing literally anything else.

steve rolls off your bed and lands on his feet in one fluid motion before running over to your brother. grabbing dustins shoulders, he shakes him to try and stop the screaming. "hey! alright, can you quit it?"

"no! you were-you-my eyes!" dustin scrubs at his face with utter turmoil. he hadnt even known that steve was in his house. normally the asshole makes his presence known, stops by dustins room to say hi. its why he barged in in the first place.

had dustin known hed walk into steve in your bed, he wouldve brought a goddamn flame thrower with him instead.

"we were reading, you moron!" youre next to steve now, desperately trying to quiet your brother before your mom asks whats going on. hes already bad enough, but if your mother finds out steve had been in your bed as well, thered be permanent hearing loss.

"read at your desk! thats what those damn things are built for!"

steve shoves his hand through his hair, agitated. "oh, and who are you? the desk police?"

"'desk police'?" you stare at the teen, disappointed. "thats the best you could come up with?"

"im under a lot of pressure right now. cut me some slack."

"i want you dead."

both you and steve turn to dustin, shocked and disturbed by his words.

"okay, thank you for sharing your feelings, dustin." awkwardly you pat his shoulder. at least hes being honest and open with you. "not necessarily what i wanted to hear, but im proud of you for sharing-"

"he wants me dead and youre commending him?"

"not now," jamming an elbow into steves side, you shut him up and focus on your brother again. "now, is there a reason you barged in or can we go back to reading?"

dustins grimace on his face seems permanent now. his nose is slightly upturned, his eyes distrusting. narrowing them at you, he takes slow, calculated steps back out of your room. "dinner is ready," he says tersely before leaving entirely.

"well, this will be fun." steve sighs, and you nod grimly.

dinner is not fun.

dustin doesnt look steve in the eye the entire time. he sits as far away as possible from the teen. when asked to pass the bread, dustin pointedly ignores steves request and throws a roll to you. the bread nearly knocks your mothers water over and shes finally had enough.

"goodness, dusty! what has gotten into you tonight?" she exclaims, settling the glass that threatens to spill.

mouth full of mashed potatoes, his eyes light up evilly. before he can even think about opening his obnoxious mouth, you kick him underneath the table. your foot connects with his shin and dustin wheezes mashed potatoes all over his meal.

"dusty!" your mother gasps, alarmed. she looks at you in concern while steve snorts into his glass of water. "what is going on with you three?"

"nothing, mom." grabbing the bread that was thrown at you, you pick it apart with your fingers and make a delighted sound. "dinner is lovely tonight, by the way."

"i love what youve done with the mashed potatoes, mrs. henderson." steve is quick to add, jumping in. he makes a whole show of scooping up the mashed food and shoving it into his mouth, moaning in pleasure. "is there garlic in this?"

your mother, always easily distracted, claps her hands with joy. "why, yes! i wanted to try something different. do you really like it?"

"i adore it."

later that night you find yurtle the turtles mealworms underneath your pillow.

“COME HOME” BLURB MASTERLIST

if you’d like to buy me a coffee ☕︎

[soobiary]

a/n; hii this is the first thing i have published 🙏 also im planning on making this a series, its a hyunsu x reader 🫶 please comment and reblog if you enjoyed it, tell me if it sucks not and if u want the next part, okay?

bewitched - cha hyunsu x reader ☆

it was cold.

goosebumps spread throughout your body as you jolts awake, wincing at the cold stone pressed upon your body. your mind was a blur, how did you get here? you bring your hands into your sight as you look at them wide eyed.

is this real life?

cuts were littered onto your body, how and when did they get there? you have no idea.

"what are you doing?! get up!"

a male voice yelled out to you. you put your hands by your side, finally taking in your surroundings. there was rubble everywhere, and it was like a building had collapsed. a sign that read "green home mansion apartments" stood there, covered in weeds and moss.

wait. green home apartments..?

"hey! can you hear me? are you trying to die?"

the man runs up to you, grabbing your arm and pulling you up. your mind seemed absent, and you felt like you were missing something but you didn't know what.

you let out a gasp as you are pulled away by the tall man. you eyed his army green uniform, a soldier?

"miss! can you hear me? how long have you been here for? we need to get you some help."

the soldier placed you down into a truck, shaking your shoulders slightly as he spoke.

"n-no...i don't remember."

you shake your head slightly, trying to clear your confusion.

"who are you? whats happening?"

you feel overwhelmed and confused, and the fog in your mind is making it difficult to process what's going on. you look over at the soldier, hoping that he can provide some answers to your questions.

the soldier glances over at you, his expression empathetic.

"look miss, we need to get you to help. you're hurt and you seem dazed from what happened back there."

you look away and furrow your brows, as if you are thinking very hard to answer his question.

"do you have any idea of who you are or how you ended up in this mess? did you lose your memory?"

you look away, not wanting to face his questions. you feel overwhelmed and confused, and you sense that he is growing impatient with your silence.

you look back, examining his appearance. hes wearing a army green uniform, and he has a name tag on his chest that reads;

park chan-young.

"we can talk about this later then, when your mind clears up. for now, stay in the back seat. dont do anything crazy, alright?"

you nod in agreement, wanting to respect the soldiers authority. you take a seat in the back of the truck. you keep your gaze out the window as the ride progresses. the enviroment looks darker and colder than what you remember, which is unusual.

"excuse me sir. im sorry if i sound dumb by asking this..but whats going on..? where is everyone?"

you turn your gaze to the soldier sitting in the front seat. he glances in the mirror to look at you.

"you really don't know? the powers out, and theres monsters everywhere. no one knows who or what caused it."

"monsters... are you serious?"

your mind feels even more cloudier and confused as you try to process this new information. you began to consider whether the soldier might be making some kind of joke, or if he actually believes that there are monsters outside. you look out the window again, still noticing how dark it is outside.

"you're not making this up, are you?"

you ask slowly, still hoping the soldier will confirm your suspicions that he's not being serious.

The soldier looks back at you with an exasperated expression.

"miss, trust me, I wish I was making this up, but it's real. we don't have time to waste, we need to keep you and everyone else out of danger."

as he speaks, you feel a sinking feeling in your stomach, as it dawns on you that the soldier might be telling the truth. but you're still not sure how to believe the words coming out of his mouth.

"if there really are monsters out there... what do they look like?" you ask cautiously him.

the soldier takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly.

"they come in all shapes and sizes, we can't really pin it down," he says with a grim expression.

"some are animal-like, some are human-like, and some are straight out of nightmares. you've got to trust me when I say you don't want to find out what they look like."

you are about to respond when suddenly a loud bang is heard from outside of the truck. the soldier glances out the windshield, a look of concern on his face.

"miss, i need you to stay quiet" he whispers urgently.

you sit in stillness, holding your breath, and you can hear the soldier pull out his weapon and cock it.

"get ready," he mouths silently.

you feel the truck come to a sudden stop, and as you look out the windshield, you notice that a group of monsters are surrounding the vehicle. the soldier raises his gun and fires at the monsters, as they start to lunge towards the truck.

[ganondoodle]

yeah no of course i cant stop trying still ...

currently trying to get out of the mindset -draw what could be popular- by designing some rough ideas for the weapons shops in the new totk rewrite (fuse isnt a thing here)

to explain; during the first part (before villain rauru reveal and change to shiekah arm) the way to repair or craft weapons is with a new type of NPCs; they are smiths that can repair your weapons, craft them, and have some avaible to buy (mostly for arrows but also small selection of weapons), it costs material and some money, or if you dont have the material/all material, it costs more money but is still doable, price depending on how valuable or hard to get the material is you dont want to spend on it

then after the switch to the sheikah arm and zelda taking on the role of your permanent companion, she can both repair and craft as well (might be limited but expandable with quests, as in that zelda learns more skills- so theres new quests after the switch and you cant just do everything before that) with the difference that you need to have the required materials but it costs no money

this would mean that while no giant change before and after the halfway point of the game, it is definitely different feeling, plus its a convenience that is good to have in the second half but shouldnt be sorely missed in the first, the difference between NPC smith and zelda gives you the option to spend material or money- so you arent forced to grind anything if you need either for something else, plus new quest rewards for the second half and new points of interest in general, similar to a stable but not too close so theres still an element of exploration; they arent super frequent but around the map of the surface enough that you can reasonably reach one in each region (perhaps after aquiring the yiga as allies/or before that in disguise they can do the same for you but are only found in the underground)

it would also allow for more diverse gameplay, if your favorite weapon is about to break (it might not fully disappear but if you use it up it would go into a condition like the master sword when its lost its power, not usable or doing tiny amount of damage, but not gone forever if you accidentally use it too much-) you can decide to throw it away or keep it until you find the next smith, depending on if you already found one and see you are close or havent yet, or spend the material if you have it to instantly repair it

(i havent decided yet if rauru might be willing to repair your weapons, but not to craft them since he lacks the skill (would never admit to it) and he only wants to give you just enough support to enable you to do what he wants you to do- i think that might work better bc its still a difference to zelda, since she can craft too, but not too much so that you would feel like the games forcing you to use the smiths in the first half ... possibly its unlocked with one of the enigma stones, when rauru can claim he is able to do that now bc it lets him recover some of his strength)

what im wondering now, which is a bit important i think, is .. should the smiths be wandering around a set path or have a lil stationary shop? if they wander around it would make it a bit more depending on situation of you wanna use them, but bears the risk of making it annoying if you dont know here they are or happen to be too far away and a lil weird bc should have something to work on there, like an anvil, which would be a lil strange to carry around; a lil shop could potentially turn into a location you keep teleporting back and forth though im leaning towards the shop; you could make helping them build it a quest too, or saving them from monsters? overall i think this idea is a rather nice balance

[artdcnaldson]

some gross nasty here for u (hope ur feeling ok btw, lmk if theres anything i can do)

dom art. and i dont mean like, sweet dom art, im talking ab mean art! like it's a mutually destrictive situation - he's married, you're his fucking babysitter for fuckssake - but tashis cheated on him again, and he’s pent-up and hes angry and hes stressed. and right now, the only place he has any semblance of control over his own life is the bedroom. his own dirty little secret. and you're drowning in college debt and more than stressed, yourself, and it feels so, so good to give up and give someone else the reins for a while, to throw up your hands and say, im off. just you and art. well, his cock, anyway. and if he slides you a little more money here and there to help with the bills, well, it's not like him or his wife will miss it !

art manages to keep it secret from tashi. somehow. in fact, when you're alone with him in the hotel, cross-legged on the floor watching 'encanto' for the hundredth time with lily and singing along, he can almost pretend it's you he's married to, you he wakes up to in the morning, you who raises his baby girl. but that's ridiculous, because try as he might to feel anything other than lust for you, he can't. his heart belongs to tashi, belongs to the heavy metal band on his finger. and all those sweet domestic fantasies inevitably give way to his true desires - you he bends over the kitchen counter, you who kneels before him after practice, you who he fills up with hot cum whenever he needs. and he knows you don't feel anything remotely sweet for him, either, because sometimes you're unavailable because you're on a date, and because to you, art donaldson is a risque fantasy, a way to get your rocks off, and a fat check.

and that was fine. its was totally okay.

until fucking patrick came back. and suddenly, after new rochelle, patrick's swinging around all the time and you two can't just sneak off like you used to because while tashi can be preoccupied with brand deals and press tours and media circuts, patrick has nothing better to do than to follow art around all day. you don’t care, you're just salty about the loss of your dick appointment and the pay.

once, you get close to catching them. you can hear it - patricks short, staccato breaths, the low rumble of his groans, and art. art, unlike anything you've ever heard before, art, undone in a way you didn't totally suspect was possible. art, whining into his pillows, practically begging for it-- you pull away from the door. take your hand off the knob. step away, and send a stray toy of lily's rolling. clattering. you freeze. the sounds stop.

then, art, cool as ever, the commanding tone you're painfully familiar with, "come on in, baby, i know you're out there."

it's how you end up between them. it's how patrick finds out about arts dominant streak (he thinks it's hot, even if hes much more of a brat than you are, and art enjoys knocking him down a peg). more accurately, it's how you end up beneath them, begging for them to just take you both. art orchestrating the whole thing, telling patrick when to put his dick in you, where and when patrick is allowed to cum, that he can't finish until you have, at least twice. on his face/fingers, then on his dick. patrick has to wear a condom though. even if it doesn't mean much, you're still art's.

-kit ♡♡♡

You ate <3 Soemthing is soooo yummy about being used by Art and using him back <3 Nothing more than a paycheck and a dick for you to play with <3

You’re so sexually pent up by the time you walk in on them that you’d have gotten on your knees and begged to join if Art hadn’t instructed you to. It’s annoying, how domineering and commanding he can still be while taking Patrick Zweig’s dick in his ass.

That first time, you’re beneath Art— you let him bury himself in your pussy. Each time Patrick thrusts, it sends Art pushing deeper into you. It’s heavy and hot beneath Art’s body weight, and you just lay there and take it. Watching Patrick from over Art’s shoulder, smirking at him as he reduces Art to fucked-out moans and whimpers as he gets closer and closer. You think it’s crazy— you never get Art like that, you get Art all possessive and intense, not malleable and needy.

When Art cums, you have to finish yourself off— it was more about him than you. Patrick watches your fingers move between your thighs, rubbing at your clit as he continues to fuck into Art and chase his finish. You cum first, and you look so fucking pretty that he can’t help it.

Patrick likes you. Art likes you. Art likes Patrick. Patrick likes Art. But Art isn’t going to let you and Patrick be together alone. He’s no crazy, you’re his plaything, his employee. So he directs Patrick’s fingers, mouth, cock, all with the express purpose of pleasuring you.

There are no secret whispers, no chemistry he can’t see. Just Patrick listening to Art’s commands and you falling apart on the brunet’s tongue, on his cock. When you finish, you go and curl up against Art and thank him like he’d done it. You tell him you’ve missed him and he smiles affectionately, like he would smile at a cute pet doing a trick for him.

@gamesetart

[creatrixanimi]

I have a question about the Teen!Ingo disappears AU. How does he return home, if at all? I would he would, considering the Battle Subway, but im also curious how this changes the narrative for all of that! It’s a fun idea to play with.

Thanks for asking!! Its always fun to try and has my floaty ideas out with asks like this!! As of right now, the only thing ive really set in stone is that at the very least Ingo will have to be there for an extended period of time considering everyone ive depicted in hisui is about 15-20 years younger than they would be in canon. Or at least depending on headcanon. But I personally dont see Gaeric being anything younger than 35 in PLA... And that leads me to the unfortunate reality in this AU that there really is no way around Ingo missing out on at the very least, the initial and canon years battle subway unless i REALLY fudge the BW timeline :( that one was a BIG sacrifice to make in this AU and It really does make me sad since its such a massive aspect of Ingo's identity but there isnt really a way around it. When i made that original comic, i didnt really think about it further than wanting to play with the nimbasa trio fighting with some tragedy sprinkled on top and continuing it has made his career a casualty of the premise. Concerning Ingo's fate in this au i think im leaning more towards him staying in hisui? I know that that might put some people off of the au in general because its so tragic, but its always been the scenario i've preferred for canon so i guess i'll go with that here? Theres a lot to do with his family's grief and healing process that i feel is somewhat cheapened by him magically getting to go home after everyone has already accepted his loss. I have read MANY a reunion fic and I really do like them, but i have little desire to delve into one myself unless i have an especially unique idea that i would want to play with. One concern i do have with this au is it being too grimdark with not enough highs to balance it out, especially on his family's end of things. I am open to hearing suggestions or ideas tho because really when it gets boiled down to its essence, this au is basically just canon but with the timeline for the twins rolled back several years. Everything else would more or less be canon-compliant aside from delving further into emmet's (and elesa and drayden's) grief. And exploring the hisui natives' adolescence/childhoods. But I do have to say that nothing is set in stone and everything is subject to change (if i get that far) so dont take this rambling as an outline of the AU, Im just kinda thinking about what I might want to do haha.

[walnutcookie]

good day fellow rodger fan, i rlly love your art it gives me whimsy and joy. do you have any headcanons ab him and glisten, perhaps toodles as well? (family dynamics my beloved actually) if not either way i think your stuff is still so rad.

AHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!! <333 WEEPS TEARS OF JOY.... i do have some headcanons hehehe... in no particular order/organization heres some of my thoughts on them:

- Rodger is a sleepwalker. Very Embarrassed by it.

- Toodles really enjoys drawing !!! She likes to draw with the other toons a lot (especially glisten, but he usually just watches her and then treats her art like the mona lisa so she feels good about herself)

- rodgers reaction to any sort of physical affection is really funny because he doesnt know how to react. He wants to keep his awesome and mysterious persona but also he doesnt want to be rude or anything. does he reciprocate? does he try to get away before it happens??? does he say something or does he keep quiet? Usually it just results in him freezing up and going stiff

- also adding onto above he tends to be paranoid about peoples intentions. bro gets a hug from goob and freezes and hes thinking "is this an attempt to console me does he think im mentally unwell or is he trying to find my weaknesses so he can kill me"

- in general rodger can be a very paranoid person and starts panicking at the slightest threat but hes pretty good at stopping to think and clearing his head. Logically he knows goob wouldnt kill him and doesnt know his secrets but it is a thought that pops up in his head for a brief moment

- toodles is always very quick to jump in and try to help whenever someone is upset. She wants to help people as best she can so ofc she would but the problem is that shes never sure what to say to cheer people up :'] she tries parroting some of the things rodger has told her when she was sad but also from her experience it never works so she tries to distract people instead most of the time. it makes her feel really guilty whenever she doenst try to help or if she fails to make them feel any better

- Toodles is very close with teagan!! teagan is like her fun uncle :] they take care of toodles sometimes if rodger is busy (or cough missing). Tea parties galore!!!!

- glisten is romo-repulsed i know this in my heart ok. [i know ive drawn him doing romantic things i cant explain the nuances to this in a cohesive way im just projecting ontohim as a romo repulsed person in a relationship]

- Glisten is definitely introverted but not in the "ohh hes shy and hates people" way hes just drained when he talks to people even if he likes talking to people. He needs to take breaks from socializing a lot to recharge his social battery especially since hes always so worried about what people think of him but he also dies if hes alone too long

- toodles is actually VERY fascinated with bugs if theres an ant or a beetle or a roach or something in the facility shes gonna beg to keep it and make a house for it so she can "give it a better life" (glisten will not scream or freak out but there WILL be visible discomfort on his face and he will avoid that bug like the plague)

- rodger smokes cigarettes . He knows which employee(s) carry them around and will snatch one from their pocket at the right moment when nobody is looking... he tries covering his tracks and flushing everything down the toilet and covering up the smell but ofc he gets found out when theres a clog LOL.

- There was also suspicion when toodles started pretend-smoking and saying she was doing the thing that rodger did but most everyone else just assumed it was toodles being a silly little kid

okie dokieee thats all ill do for now !!! Thank you so much for this ask GAUH im so happy people are interested in my hcs for them n stuff 🥹

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Elisabeth: das Musical (1992) [Elisabeth: the Musical]

Ayyyyyyyyy its been several months but Im BACK BABEY!!! Im not gonna be back for long though because Im not unemployed yet so I dont have the time to watch movies and write reviews about them all the time, but I do have the time to sit down every once in a while and write a little bit of this. which has been taking me several months now

Anyway, if you thought I wouldnt use this project as an excuse to rewatch my favorite musical, you would be very wrong >:)

Now, since this is my favorite musical you would probably think that writing a review would be easy, but because Ive basically been thinking about it nonstop for a few months, its caused me to have this giant buildup of thoughts, its kind of like theres a clogged faucet in my brain right now, to the point where I struggle to properly articulate any of them, especially if Im not being prompted somehow. Like it goes beyond vampire-autism at this point, its not enough to just invite me to talk about Elisabeth, you need to ask me specific questions (on that note, my askbox is always open <3)

So yeah, Im not going to go into a lot of detail but to make up for that, I will be talking about all different productions Ive seen so far in the order that I watched them in (all proshots because Im unfortunately very picky when it comes to my musical-recordings looking and sounding good lol)

The Vienna Production(s)

Thats referring to the original 1992 version, the 1998 version and the 2005 revival.

oughhhhhhh its so good, they really put everything into this one: beautiful songs, strong artistic direction, incredible social commentary, a portrayal of death that serves mad cunt, gay sex etc etc

My first experience with this musical went as follows: my mother bought me the 2001 Essen cd and just kinda put it (and a few other musical cds that dont matter) in my room while I wasnt there without telling me, because we were arguing and our relationship was pretty bad at the time, and it took me a while to listen to it, in part because I was mad at her and wanted to spite her (?) but also I didnt look at the cd cover very closely and for the longest time I thought it was about one of the british Elizabeths and I was like "tch. i dont care about some british queen, im not listening to that". And then one day I actually looked at it and saw that it was a Sissi-musical, which, I also didnt care about her at the time so that didnt really pique my interest either. A few days later I decided to look at the back of the cd cover which had all the song titles, and then I just kinda did that again every few days until I finally took the little booklet with the lyrics out of the case, read through them, and then at last listened to the songs. I do not know why I was doing like, regency-era courting rituals with this random cd, I have never done this before or since, but I did it this one time. And I really liked it so I would listen to it atleast once every day, usually in the mornings because I always wake up at 5am and I needed something to kill time before I had to leave at 7 lol

Theres only 16 songs on this cd and I think they do a decent job at 'summarizing' the story, but I could tell I was missing a lot (although I thought it was just dialogue at the time), and I was really curious about that but I didnt even try to find a proshot or a bootleg or look further into it because I didnt think I was going to find it because I thought it was super obscure because its. german. Idk, does anyone else kindof instinctually assume that every piece of media from your native country is some obscure bullshit that no one cares about (including other people from your native country) or is that just me? Whatever, despite me not looking further into it, I did eventually get the 2005 proshot recommended to me on youtube which is great, i love that google knows my every move and I love that I cant do anything about it. But for some reason I still needed that push to get me to actually watch it, and that push came in the form of a Diana: The Musical review. I watched it and then I read some of the comments and then I left my very own, very long comment where I compared it to Elisabeth: das Musical. Since I obviously hadnt seen either musical in full it was honestly probably pretty incoherent, but my main point was that it looks like Diana couldve really used some satire and social commentary elements similar to the ones present in Elisabeth, which I knew were there because the cd had Milch and Kitsch. Those songs are actually one of the things that I initially found very intriguing because they seemed so out of place among most of the other songs that are these very emotional and earnest ballads and duets, like Wie Du, Ich gehör nur mir, Elisabeth mach auf mein Engel, Ich will dir nur sagen, and Boote in der Nacht are more or less what I would expect from a Sissi-musical, and then Der letzte Tanz is more or less what I would expect from a Sissi-musical where death is a love interest, but Kitsch especially was such a wildcard in there.

Anyway, after I wrote that comment under the Diana: The Musical review, it occurred to me that I should probably watch Elisabeth: das Musical before I start writing needlessly long analyses in random comments sections. And then I thought to myself "oh! since these are both musicals about generally beloved royal women, it would be interesting if I watched both of them for the first time back to back and then maybe made a video essay comparing them" I decided to watch Diana first because what little I heard of the songs in that review sounded pretty bad so I wanted to get that out of the way first, and it was indeed bad, but I was still sure that there was enough there to make a video essay about, especially if Im comparing it to something else. And then I watched Elisabeth and it was so good that I was like "you know, I dont think i want to compare this to that other piece of shit" so I didnt write the video essay I wanted to write originally and started on something that was just about Elisabeth das Musical, which I also didnt end up writing because I usually have a low attentionspan and I struggle with writing alot, thats a big part of why these posts take me so long, along with the fact that I have a job now thats been sucking all the time and energy out of me like a cruel vampire

So yeah, the 2005 proshot was my first time properly experiencing this musical and I do think its a good introduction because things are explained a bit more and it feels like more of a cohesive story compared to the original one which feels more loose with less connective tissue; like, you can tell this musical was made the assumption that the aufience already knew about Elisabeth as a historical figure to some extent, which is fair enough but I missed out on three years of highschool history so I knew literally nothing, like Rudolf's suicide was a huge surprise to me. And it spared me the disappointment of watching the full musical for the first time without getting to hear my second favorite song, Wenn ich tanzen will. That being said, I do vastly prefer the 1992 version simply because the cast is the definition of perfection. I have yet to see or hear an actor that managed to do a better with Lucheni than Ethan Freeman, and ohhhhh you shouldve seen how insane I was about Uwe Kröger's Tod after I first watched that proshot

Of course I also loved Pia Douwes, Andreas Bieber and Else Ludwig but I just feel a little less strongly about them because I think they usually do a pretty good job casting Elisabeth, Rudolf and Sophie, whereas I feel like they struggle to cast actors for Lucheni and Tod that manage to live up to the original cast even a little. Its definitely less bad with Lucheni, the main issue I have with most of his actors besides Ethan Freeman is that none of them ever even try to do an italian accent (probably because they cant do a good one which is good, no accent is definitely better than a bad one in this case, but still) so all the italian bits of dialogue sound really unnatural imo. But with Tod its like, straightup i dont even know what on earth theyre trying to do most of the time, but it very rarely works for me.

Now, the eagle-eyed of you will have noticed that ive talked about the 1992 proshot and the 2005 proshot but not the 1998 proshot, even though I mentioned it at the very start of this section. Thats because i FUCKING HATE IT!!!!! No just kidding, its mostly the same as the 1992 production except it has the longer version of Nichts, nichts, gar nichts and the cast is a bit worse. Its actually kind of impressive because thinking back on it, I feel like literally every actor was just the slightly worse knockoff version, with the exception of Maya Harkvoort as Elisabeth. And thats not to say that theyre bad, I just like them less than the original cast and I dont think they make any interesting acting choices to make up for it. And then theres the guy who played der Tod, whose name I am not looking up because Im about to get mean and I'll feel less bad about that if I dont use his actual name. He just sounds so bad. Hes like Uwe Kröger from an alternate universe where he cant sing. And to be fair, Im pretty sure this is the same guy as the one who played Tod on the 1996 cd and hes literally unbearable on that one, so he has improved quite a bit, but it just wasnt enough.

I remember a while ago when all my Elisabeth-mutuals reblogged this gifset of 1998!Tod and I dont remember if I only liked it or if I reblogged it as well but whatever I did, I did it with gritted teeth because I had recently watched that proshot and hated his performance. Everyone was going #woa mama hes serving cunt and in my head I was just like "yeah, but hes not serving a good performance thoughhhhhhhh". Also, he literally looks and has a lot of the same mannerisms as uwe!Tod, I'd be gravely disappointed if he didnt serve cunt

So yeah, its not like, awful or anything but I think the 1998 proshot is really only worth watching if you wanna see Maya Harkvoort as Elisabeth but in a pre-2001-changes production

The 1999 Schevening Production

Now THIS is an awful Elisabeth production! I hated this fucker so much I didnt even bother rewatching it for this post. Fortunately I did write a little review of it immediately after watching it, so if you care about my fresh 1999 Schevening Production Thoughts, feel free to scrawl through the bog that is my blog to find it

The first (and pretty much only) thing that you need to know about this one is that they cut all of the political songs. So theres no Hass, no Jedem gibt er das Seine, no Milch im pretty sure, and definitely no Die Schatten werden länger Reprise. Honestly I might be missing a cut song or two here because they somehow managed to shave a whole half an hour off this thing. I would be impressed by how they managed to do that without rendering the story completely incomprehensible if I wasnt so busy being angry at the way they just completely gutted this musical. I dont even understand why they did it, the musical is SO MUCH obviously worse for it! Like, okay, I could kinda get it if they had just cut Hass since thats obviously the most uncomfortable song (i would think less of them for it, but I would get it, the takarazuka version does it too) but them cutting the other political songs is just baffling to me because its like. bro. its politics from the 1800s, how is that upsetting or discomforting nowadays?

Whatever, lets talk about some other stuff. The cast was mostly not remarkable enough for me to remember ~1 year later. Pia Douwes is here as Elisabeth and shes very good as always, thats kindof it. This version of Der Tod is the most aggressive and overtly antagonistic Ive seen, which was kinda interesting in the sense that Death is usually personified as a straightfoward villain and vienna!Tod was kind of a subversion of that and a little more complex and now this production is basically subverting the subversion, but I untimately wasnt all that into it

I remember initially quite enjoying the sets and overall style of this production, Im pretty sure in my original review I said something along the lines of "I like the symbolism and abstractness of the original production, but its neat seeing a more literal take on it" and now Im just like. chuckles nervously, Okay guys, its been fun, can we go back to the symbolism. please.

So yeah, I really dont think this one is worth watching unless youre a hardcore Pia-stan or youre just really committed to watching every version of Elisabeth: das Musical you can get your hands on, like meeeeee <3

The 2004 Budapest Production

This is a really good one! I actually rewatched it for this post and I was excited to do so. I dont have too much to say about it though, in terms of story its fairly similar to the Vienna productions except that it has Kein Kommen ohne Gehen and the conspiracy song and der Tod has a bit more of a romantic vibe. Actually, i think a better way of describing it is, its like the takarazuka production but un-takarazukafied, which might not make that much sense if you havent seen both of these especially considering I havent talked about the takarazuka production yet. But what I mean is, both of these productions focus a lot more on the hungarian revolution-side of things and make it into more of a proper subplot, and the way they do it is mostly structurally the same (as in, new scenes/songs are inserted at mostly the same points in the narrative) but takarazuka version is a lot more glitzy and overdramatic where this production is a lot more grounded. I dont really prefer one over the other because the approaches are so different that I feel like they cant really be compared. I do like that they do that overall and I really like the conspiracy song for drawing additional parallels between Rudolf and Elisabeth, even though I know its not historically accurate, although I will say that it feels a little bit off in this production which otherwise does seem to be going for historical accuracy. Like, it doesnt bother me at all in the takarazuka production just because i feel like that one takes so many liberties that it doesn't really stick out, but even here, its not the biggest deal to me

Anyway, other stuff. The stage feels weirdly small, but I really like the sets, they lean a bit more towards being literal rather than symbolic but they do some really cool stuff with them, I especially like the way they'll spin essentially the whole set sometimes, it makes for some very interesting and dynamic staging. The performances were great, obviously Szabó P Szilveszter as der Tod was amazing, he has such a beautiful and powerful voice, and I also loved Janza Kata as Elisabeth. I feel like she played it a bit angrier than Im used to, like you can really feel her her frustration at the world around her even early on during Wie Du, and its so good. mwah

This production is the first one that Ive ever liked Franz Joseph in even a little. With him Im usually like "goddddd he sucks so much, i literally cant believe they got married" from the very start, but with this guy I was like "oh..... hes kinda cute, I get what Elisabeth sees in him" during So wie man plant und denkt and Nichts ist schwer. And I was initially worried that I only thought that because they didnt give him that historically acurrate haircut that the Vienna productions give that looks really bad and stupid, however I have since seen the takarazuka productions where they also give him a better haircut, and out of all the performers Ive seen Ive only liked two, so. yay! Im not shallow as fuck! Although I will reiterate that that era was truly a dark age for men's hair, I have such a viscerally negative reaction to most of those styles. And ugh, dont even get me started on the facial hair...... So yeah, while the haircut is not my only reason for liking him so much, it does help quite a bit

I will say, I noticed quite a few lyrics that I didnt really like. Or rather, because I dont speak hungarian so i dont actually know what the lyrics are and have to go off the subtitles and other translations, I dont like the sentiment behind them regardless of whether the lyrics sound good when you can properly understand them, if that makes sense. Like, the last line of Kein Kommen ohne Gehen was something like "You will be my queen of the night forever" and I just dont like that idea fundamentally, like my opinion of what this line is communicating wouldnt change if it was communicating it in a different way. But there werent too many lines that bothered me like that and most of them are not particularly (negatively) memorable, they just made me frown a lil as I was watching and then I basically immediately forgot about them.

So yeah, its really good and I'd definitely recommend watching it if you havent already

The Takarazuka Production(s)

That's referring to. all of them. I have seen all the normal proshots from 1996 to 2018, all the concert proshots and I have seen a few of the shinjinkoen ones as well (not all or even a lot of them bc theyre very hard to find unfortunately). Fortunately, theyre fundamentally all the same, the only big change that they ever made was adding Wenn ich tanzen will in 2002, and they change the costumes sometimes but thats it, so I dont have to get into every single individual production. Atleast not right now, I might at least compare the different Tod-performances because there are some striking differences, but that would be for a different post

I went on a bit of a journey watching all these different proshots, the first one I saw was the 1996 Star one and I absolutely loved it, then I watched a few more and I started noticing some issues which caused me to start disliking it, but then I watched some more and came around to liking it again. Its like, I have all these criticisms and complaints but I dont really think about those as Im watching it, Im just kinda along for the ride and having a good time and then when Im like, on a walk and I randomly start thinking about Elisabeth: Ai to Shi no Rondo I go "man, theres a bunch of shit here that sucks"

So yeah, lets talk about the shit that sucks, from Bothers Me Most to Bothers Me Least

It feels like they tried to make der Tod the protagonist instead of Elisabeth by giving him more stagetime and also giving him like three reprises of Ai to Shi No Rondo, effectively replacing the Ich gehör nur mir melody as the most important one, which I dislike on principle, but it also just plain doesnt work. Like, theyre trying to make this guy a protagonist with a rich inner world but first of all, hes supposed to be a personification of aspects of Elisabeth's (and Rudolf's) inner world and second of all, even as a more straightforward and human-seeming romantic character, his whole appeal is that you cant really know his inner world because hes mysterious like that and ultimately nonhuman, so all you can get out of him here is shallow little songs about his feelings for Elisabeth that are really bland and boring. Also, him singing about his love for Elisabeth so many times (and at such inappropriate moments like directly after she considered killing herself and at her sons funeral) makes him seem unbearably pathetic, but that actually doesnt bother me that much because I think its very funny

This version is definitely a lot more sanitized with there being no Hass, Kitsch and Kitsch Reprise being heavily altered to be less poignant, the bigger focus on Tod's romantic nature and Elisabeth's rougher edges being sanded down. The colorful costumes and sets also just make it feel like more of a silly fun time which contributes to the sanitized-ness imo. In a way, its kinda like the Scheveningen prod except this one went about its sanitization with surgical precision, where that one just started senselessly chopping off limbs

This version is very sillygoofy, thats the best word for it. This is my last complaint because if you catch me in the right mood this isnt even a complaint, this is just an aspect of the show that I think is fun and that I like a lot, but if you catch me in a different mood then boy will I complain. I dont really know how to properly explain this one in a concise way to someone who hasnt seen it. Instead of that little scene of some hungarians gossiping about little Sophie after Stationen einer Ehe, we get a scene of some hungarians being upset at the austrian empire and planning to stage a protest next time Elisabeth and Franz Joseph come to do some kind of assembly (? i guess) and then the assembly happens and they do the protest and the imperial guards shoot up into the air to intimidate them into stopping and then Franz Joseph turns to Elisabeth like "cmon, we gotta leave" but shes like "no wait" and she takes of her cloak (shes been wearing a cloak that hides her whole body basically this entire time btw), revealing her dress which is hungarian flag-colored and then she says "Éljen, Hungary!" and the crowd goes wild!!!

That scene is the sillygoofiest thing that happens in this production, nothing tops it, all the other sillygoofy bits are more subdued in their sillygoofiness, but still, I feel like its a good scene to use as an example of this show's sillygoofiness. Also, whenever I think about scenes in this show that are sillygoofy I always think of the scenes that are part of the whole hungarian revolution-subplot. Theyre actually not that tonally different from any of the other parts of this show, like obviously they would be absolutely hilarious if you just inserted them into the original austrian production or the hungarian production as they are, but they dont stick out within the takarazuka production itself, yknow what I mean? They've made enough subtle changes to the original material that the things that they added (which would otherwise seem incongruous with that material) dont immediately stick out.

All of this to say, I think the people who have tried to adapt this musical into the 'takarazuka style' have done an excellent job at it, but I could definitely see people who are fans of Elisabeth das Musical not really enjoying it because of that, unless theyre like me, and can be momentarily distracted from its flaws by virtue of featuring a bunch of beautiful women singing beautifully for 2 and a half hours. But if that sounds good to you, I would 100% recommend it because its a fun and very well-made time. I dont have a specific proshot that I would recommend over the others, but I will say that I have a huge soft spot for the 1996 Star one because its the first one i saw and I absolutely adore Asaji Saki's Tod, and for the 2009 Moon one because thats the one I spent a bunch of time making german subtitles for to show my parents

Okay, before I move on to talking about the next production, I just have one more thing to say, or rather ask: why are the takarazuka and hungarian productions so similar? They both premiered in the year 1996 (and there was no pre-takarazuka japanese prod to my knowledge) so it seems impossible to me for one to have taken from the other, and from what I can tell, the changes that are specific to both of these productions and that dont really appear in any others (except for the toho production but we'll get to that) have existed in both of them from the start, so like, how did that happen, what overlap was there between their creative teams because there must have been something or else they wouldnt have turned out so similar? So yeah, if anyone reading this knows more about the behind the scenes history of these productions, please tell me about it, Im very curious

The 2016 Toho Production (White Cast)

Its kinda funny going from the Takarazuka section where I had seen literally as many of them as I could physically get my hands on, to this one where Im just like "yeah, Ive just seen the one that Im pretty sure is the most popular one, its atleast the one I see people post gifs of the most". To be fair, I think theyve only released 6 or 7 proshots even though theyve been putting it on since 2001, god knows why

Whatever, this production is really good and I like it a lot. The songs are overwhelmingly the same as they were in the takarazuka production, although theyve made some changes to the ones that were the most different to make them more like they were originally. Thats honestly a good way of describing this production as a whole; if the Budapest one felt like the takarazuka one but completely un-takarazukafied, this one was like, 50% un-takarazukafied. I was really debating with myself what percentage I would say there, because while the changes are for the most part subtle and the overall sillygoofiness remains intact for the most part, they did keep Kitsch the same and they kept Hass the same which was honestly shocking to me, I was kind of expecting them to censor it somehow or atleast tone it down or something, which is why I was actually looking at the screen during this version for once (Hass usually gives me horrible intrusive thoughts and I usually watch musicals on my tv so I cant just skip ahead, so if Im watching it and its a language I dont speak I just look away for a bit, and if Im watching it in german I'll just leave the room for a bit) but uh. they dont, and not only that but they put a gigantic swastika flag on the stage that takes up basically the entire screen and just gives me the worst intrusive thoughts. And honestly, even though this caused my brain to torment me for like two weeks, Im glad they did it because Hass really isnt a song you should try to censor or downplay, you either do it or you just dont even try. Anyway, my point here is, because that alone was SO un-takarazukalike, I was originally going to say that this production was 80% un-takarazukafied, but then I thought about it some more and I was like "well yes, but then they also added that bit to that already-sillygoofy scene where Elisabeth reveals that her dress is hungary-colored to the crowd where Batthany tried to assassinate her at Tod's behest, so. i gotta lower that percentage I think" and thats how I ended up with that number

Anyway, time to talk about some stuff that isnt the tone and how it compares to other productions. I really liked the sets, theyre leaning more towards being symbolic, although I will say that the symbolism felt a bit more simplistic compared to the Vienna productions. Still, how can i deny the sheer effect of just having like half of the stage taken up by three gigantic coffins? I feel like there are so many scenes that were kindof elevated for me because I was just like "ohhhh theyre singing about this thing while standing on this gigantic coffin and it symbolises that death is all around them and the monarchy is built on death and theyre in the midst of this dying era". One example of this is in the Jedem gibt er das Seine scene, they do it exactly like you would expect, they dont do a carousel-thing like the Vienna production, but they put Franz Joseph and his desk and his whole entourage on those coffins and then the mother comes in below them on the stage, and its just so good, I dont know what to say

I dont have too much to say about the cast, it was pretty good all around, the only thing that I can remember rn is that I thought Hanafusa Mari as Elisabeth was a bit off. Specifically whenever she had to be sad, I just never quite bought it, but I did like her whenever she was happy or glad or during Wenn ich tanzen will when she was all spiteful, and obviously her voice was absolutely beautiful. Shirota Yu as der Tod was also great, he plays it like a real freak, he actually reminded me a lot of Matè Kamaras except I like this guy more because I feel like hes not constantly hissing and growling

So yeah, it's a good production that I would definitely recommend checking out if you can

The 2009 Antwerpen Production

I never thought I'd see a version of Elisabeth: das Musical that I would consider to be basically completely uninteresting, but those freaks over in belgium somehow managed to make it

But before I get into that, I want to tell you something about my experience watching this one (and also the Scheveningen one). So, the only languages I can speak and understand fluently are german and english, so I need subtitles in order to understand all of the non-austrian productions. However, I couldnt immediately find subtitles for the Scheveningen prod and I didnt even really try to look for them that hard because I thought "eh, it doesnt matter, i know this musical inside and out and I'll probably be able to atleast kindof of understand the lyrics without subtitles anyway" because in my head I just kinda think of german and dutch as being very similar because germany and the netherlands are geographically close, even though they really arent, so I ended up watching it just not understanding the vast majority of the words. But again, I know this musical very well so it really didnt matter, although I was a bit disappointed because I was expecting to have an interesting experience listening to this musical in a language that I can somewhat understand but that is also clearly not a language that I can actually speak, do you know what I mean? Anyway, smash cut to like a year later and Im on vk.ru looking for musical proshots to download and I stumble upon this one. Because antwerpen sounds kinda german to me I assume its a german-language proshot I hadnt heard of before so I dont look for subtitles and I just watch it as is, and Im very surprised when it is not in fact german. But I feel like I can kinda understand it, so I just keep watching and I end up having that I expected to have with the dutch proshot with this one which I think is flemish (?). I'm not sure, I dont recognize this language and when I looked it up to see if anyone online knew what it was, all I got was someone on reddit being like "idk, its probably flemish" so

Anyway, back to the actual review part of this whole thing. Why do I find this to be the most uninteresting version of this musical? In a lot of ways, its basically just the 2005 Vienna production except flatter; a lot of the physical sets have been replaced by screens, the performances are all good albeit pretty unremarkable otherwise, the few times they deviate from the Vienna production are fine but also unremarkable to the point that I dont feel like going into detail about them, and the costumes felt worse somehow? Like, theyre not trying to have any kind of symbolism, theyre just historical clothes, which, to be fair, none of the non-Vienna productions that Ive seen so far really try that hard for symbolism with the costumes, I think the reason it stuck out to me here is that its otherwise so similar to the Vienna ones. They dont have a mayerling dress which is immensely disappointing for the same reason, and also now that Ive written that out, Im fully realizing for the first time that literally no production other than the Vienna ones has it and Im getting pretty upset. sighhhhh. when will men-crossdressing enjoyers win

Moving on, while I find the cast mostly unremarkable, I do have a little bit to say about them. I really enjoyed the pathetic wet cat vibes that Jan Schepens brought to Lucheni, especially in the prologue where he has that very brief interaction with Tod, although I will say that I dont like how they made him so unaware of the main plot of the musical. Like, during his little narration bit before Jedem gibt er das Seine he has a newspaper and he has to read it in order to remember that its 1854, I know they do this in some Vienna prods as well and I hate it every time. Because the whole point is, hes just been stuck in this endless loop of retelling this whole story since he died 1898 so by the time youre watching this musical in 2009 or 1992 or whenever, he knows it in and out, thats why he seems so goddamn tired in the 1992 version!!! But other than that hes fine 👍

The other person I have something to say about is der Tod, although its not relly about his performance. His performance is like. in the nicest way possible, the reason i would say hes not literally the worst in terms of singing or cuntserving is that 1998Vienna!Tod and Scheveningen!Tod respectively exist. But while I was watching I was really distracted because I keept thinking "this guy looks so familiar but Im 100% sure Ive never seen him before, he just looks like someone else i know, but who is it that he reminds me of" and then when i got to Mama wo bist du, I realized: he looks so much like one of the guys who played Sebastian in some of the black butler musicals, or atleast my memory of what that guy looks like. And I felt kind of embarassed because I was like "ohhhhhhhh ive enjoyed the concept of Young Boy And Fucked Up Non-Human Have A Relationship Which Is Oddly Soft While Also Being Nothing But Red Flags for way longer than I realized huh" And also, OF COURSE i noticed the similarity in that exact scene, good god

Whatever, theres only one last thing that bothers me and that I wanted to talk about and its Wenn ich tanzen will. I dont like how Tod grabs Elisabeth and manouvers her around like that, which, the choreography here is the same as in the 2005 Vienna production, but I didnt fully realize just how much it bothered me until watching this one so Im talking about it here. I was originally going to do a whole analysis about how I dont think it fits the song very well and thats the reason I dont like it, but upon thinking about it, I think it works well enough. Yknow the contrast between Elisabeth being so defiant and refusing to give into him even though its clear that she knows hes right about all the stuff hes saying and her compromising physical position, and also how it lays bare that der Tod has no real power because hes ultimately a manifestation of her wants, thats all pretty good tbh

No, the reason I dont like this choreography for Wenn ich tanzen will is that its sexual in a way that I dont appreciate because the woman is in the submissive position. Its like. okay so, you know those dark romance/romantasy books about a 17-20 year old girl falling for a ~500 year old guy with overpowered shadow magic and having a bunch of sex with him that are really popular right now and also really popular to make fun of? Well, I used to really like hanging out in the making-fun-of spaces until I realized that people were getting really puratanitical about what people are 'allowed' to write and the extent to which authors are 'responsible' for imparting 'good messages' to their 'impressionable audience' which, these books are not usually categorized as YA, theyre pretty clearly aimed at women who are 18 and up and even if they are, teenagers are not that impressionable but Im not getting into that rn which bothered me, not just because I fundamentally dont agree with that, but also because my issue with them is not that theyre presenting relationship dynamics that are problematic in the sense that the age gap is too big or the power gap is too big or that theyre abusive or whatever, but that theyre presenting relationship dynamics that are problematic in the sense that theyre extremely sexist

And like, to an extend this is just an issue with mainstream romance books as a whole which is why I dont really read them, and Im not saying that anyone who enjoys them is sexist or bad, its just that it personally discomforts me to the point of killing my enjoyment in things like large age gaps or crazy power dynamics, which, for the record, I do genuinely really enjoy! I just dont like it when its like "oh the virginal teeny tiny girl whos barely legal gets with the biggest most bigdicked most powerful ancient MALE to ever exist and whos lowkey highkey abusive", but if a book like that came out where the genders were reversed and it was a cute barely legal ingenue boy and an ancient powerful evil woman, I would not only not have an issue with that, I would find it extremely hot. or if it was gay in some capacity which, books that are exactly like typical romantasy books but gay probably do exist, but I dont really see people discuss them as much, so. My point here is, the typical romance/romantasy relationship dynamic just feels like a model of the patriarchy except its two people instead of like, all of society, and I dont like that and I feel similarly about this Wenn ich tanzen will choreography. Like, its not quite the same feeling but I have trouble articulating my exact discomfort with it, so Im comparing it to a different kind of discomfort that I have with something else that I am capable of articulating.

So yeah, its a fine enough Elisabeth production. watch it if you want, dont watch it if you dont want

Aaaaaaaand thats it. I know Im still missing a couple of korean proshots that I havent seen yet because I havent been able to find subtitles for them, so if theres any korean-speakers in the audience who would be willing to make and share them, I would appreciate it. If no one wants to share them, there is a website called lyricstranslate where people can submit translations of any song into any language, and the korean lyrics are on there so if Im really lucky, someone has translated all of them into a language i know and i can make my own subtitles with those. But Im still working on making a subtitle file for the 2004 Budapest proshot (the version thats available with subtitles on the internet archive is hardsubbed and I'd like the option of having softsubs), so thatll have to wait. I also downloaded a video of the 2001 Essen production, I dont know if thats a proshot or a complete bootleg but I'll watch that one eventually too and if I can muster up the motivation, maybe I'll even write reviews for those as well

Anyway, how many of these have you seen and what did you think of them? Please tell me in excruciating detail, I love reading other peoples Elisabeth-thoughts

[st4rgzer]

ORANGE JUICE matt sturniolo

summary: y/n comes back after a few tough months (very much recommend listening to orange juice by noah kahan before reading)

genre: fluff and angst

cw: big TW for recovering and becoming sober :)

a/n: again, theres more info in the songs if this doesn’t make much sense but yeah, hope y’all like it<3, will do more song rec fics, i love them

The triplets called me today, they heard I was better and they were hanging out with Nate and some other friends, so I decided to tag along.

It’s been 6 months on the dot since I got sober, I think they know about it. I’ve kind off disappeared from the face of the earth, changing myself, and I wasn’t sure if some people would approve.

I knock on the door and I’m greeted by Nick immediately, he engulfs me in a hug that lasts about a minute

“nick I missed you too but I think that’s enough” I laughed, trying to unwrap his arms, he eventually does it himself.

“yeah stop hogging her!” Chris says before wrapping his arms around me in yet another never ending hug. After a bit, Im left standing in front of Matt, he’s different, he’s grown a little bit of a beard, barely a beard, more like a stubble, a smile creeps up on my face, a familiar one, a feeling I hadn’t felt in a long time.

“you look great” he smiles at me, coming closer and embracing me in my third hug in the span of 5 minutes, I linger there for a little longer, he sighs and rests his head on the crook of my neck, his words tickle. “I’ve missed you, a lot” I giggle a bit as the stubble brushed against me jawline. I break from the hug as soon as I remember Nick, Chris, and Nate are waiting on us. “I missed you too” I whispered before Nick began ranting on about the things I’ve missed.

“And we’ve been on tour! And we’re going again soon” he explains as the end of his Ted talk comes to an end.

“wow! Thats great, im so happy for you guys” I can’t help but have a huge smile on my face, looking at the three and realizing how much they’ve grown without me, and the fact they’ve waited for me and they’re not mad at me for leaving, no questions asked.

“What have you been up to?” Matt asks with a quiet voice “if you don’t mind us asking” he quickly reassures me I don’t have to say anything I’m not comfortable with.

“Well, I’ve been getting help, doing better now” I leave it there, not wanting to give any more information than I needed to, not right now at least.

“That’s amazing, we’re proud of you” Matt places a hand on mine for comfort, everyone nods agreeing.

“Wanna help me with the snacks?” Matt breaks the silence, I nod and he leads me to the kitchen, it hasn’t changed a bit since I got here, there’s just more stuff, it’s more lived in, I like it.

I open the fridge and see a row of beers at the bottom, probably for when friends come over, my body goes tense and the sounds around me become muffled, I snap out of it when Matt pats on my shoulder.

“Hey, you alright?” He ask’s concerned, I know he’s trying to keep a calm expression but I can tell he’s worried.

“Yeah I’m fine just- got caught up for a second” I utter out with a sigh, I don’t notice my hand trembling till he grabs it.

“Theres orange juice here, I know it’s your favorite” he says softly, rubbing the palm of my hand, making sure I looked at him in the eyes so I wouldn’t get distracted with something else.

“Yeah? Thanks, I’ll get it then” I smile at him, he kissed the tips of my fingers gently

“Anything you need ok? Count on me, please” he begged, looking at me with sincerity, no games.

I nodded and the corners of my mouth turned upwards as it hit me that I was with him again, after such a long time, for me at least. I then grabbed the orange juice from the fridge and poured myself a cup, Matt glancing at me with a smile on his face as I did so.

Our hearts have changed, our faces have changed, but we’ll always find our way back to each other, no matter the changes we succumb to, and I’ll always hold that in my heart.

taglist: @iha8you @dwntwn-strnlo @slaysturniolo @stvrni0lo @strniolo @gabbylovesreading @sturn3g1rl @ifilwtmfc

[randomwriteronline]

I wonder if the toa mata recognized themselves in their own memories from before mata nui.

I dont know, i think theres possibilities to be explored about that. Suddenly remembering yourself and what you find being a complete stranger is a common thing for amnesia plots i guess but also i think this could be even more jarring. Like a more genuine difference between killing machine and living being.

Its less a matter of nature vs nurture and more a matter of nature with a certain type of nurture. Nature dictates they are powerful and driven and well meaning, but the way they are brought up produces completely different people.

Their first taste of life was a sterile room with nobody but each other and a disembodied voice reading out their duties, establishing an arbitrary hierarchy within them, and then sending them to a glorified bootcamp where a ruthless instructor worked on making them into skilled combatants and nothing else, teaching them how to use their elements as tools and weapons without indulging in them; they got a vague sense of what and how a community feels like with the Av-Matoran - as outsiders, as its protective shield, there for them but not with them - only to get that stripped away from them too because their role as life saving tools to be preserved under glass just in case of a crisis was more important.

I wonder if the Toa Mata, the ones who were taken to the Koro of Mata Nui and listened to the Turaga's tales and reprimands and would have moved mountains for the Matoran who treated them like older siblings, return with their minds to things they said or thought or did from before the Island of Mata Nui and stop in their tracks. Whose memory is that, they think? That can't be mine. I am not like that. My siblings are not like that. Some things are perfectly right, they cant deny that; but just as many if not more are so wrong that they almost feel like a really cruel joke somebody planted into their heads.

Kopaka and Tahu got along, even if they dont want to admit it because they need to bicker like children or theyll die, but are more surprised that they werent as tentatively close with anybody else. Lewa remembers so much frustration and tedium and anger that if he stalls in his memories too much he genuinely starts feeling queasy, Pohatu has remnants of bitterness and passive aggression that still cling to him like the smell of a cigarette on someone who gave up smoking, and they both hate that because its nothing like them. Onua and Gali feel like theyre peering into some kind of imperfect clone's brain when they try to remember - its themselves, they know that, it has to be, but there are certain things they know about themelves that are just completely missing and its kind of dizzying to realize that.

Im not even sure they liked each other. They work together because its their destiny, but they don't seem to seek each other out for fun or anything else. In their training days they had to be shoved in each others direction or they would have never solved their obligatory group assignments.

I wonder if their terrors and flaws could partially come from this first life that they had too. Gali's fear of her anger and Lewa's disregard for duty stemming from Hydraxon's methods - she internalized his reprimands about feeling guilt for living enemies, but without any memory of him she believes the words resurfacing in her mind from time to time are her own, and is appalled by their cruelty; he was forbidden from enjoying himself, from indulging in any form of fun, of entertainment, of joy, and unconsciously now he rebels by shirking away from responsability to do whatever he wants.

The responses to Tahu's decision regarding the codrex haunt him, the whole situation, really; how he stripped his siblings of any say on their fate because he was the leader, not even telling them or explaining himself until they had no other choice, and if he could treat them like that once then what would stop him from doing so again and again until he doesnt even think about it? Kopaka is uneasy about it too. He knew the plan and supported Tahu only because he tagged along, but hes very, very acutely aware that he would have been left just as much in the dark as everybody else otherwise, and he would gave not even had anybody to seek any comfort from because hes fairly certain none of the others would have liked him enough to care.

Onua as @cantankerouscanuck pointed out to me mightve taken Hydraxon's teachings to heart, hence why he's so quiet: no use in expressing weakness, right? But karda nui must have been hellish on his senses, with all that light - a tangible physical discomfort that would bleed out into an emotional one as he becomes conscious of how none of his siblings go through this, thus he must be damaged in some way, faulty, out of place, and so he seeks to be alone, digging himself away. And its not hard to imagine how Pohatu (who hasnt had the chance to grow into the affable, kind toa his siblings can always lean on when they need to yet) would become convinced of his uselessness within the team and seethe about it.

They arrive on Mata Nui as broken war machines with no clue who they even are and suddenly find nature and community and love, and in a moment theyre people.

I wonder if the environment helped. Being thrown upon a beach in the open air with nothing but a whole world that is so alien and yet feels so right beckoning them to come closer. Discovering their powers and their domains freely, immediately - first thing they did was dive into their respective elements without a second thought, naturally magnetized, taking after them like it was the simplest thing in the world, because they are the first toa, the first beings capable of harnessing these powers in their whole universe, and its in their nature to be so connected to them. Maybe it helped. Maybe it made them feel connected to their own selves enough to figure themselves out in a way they couldnt have done so before.

Maybe it helped to find out their collective destiny each on their own, in their own environment, at their own pace, surrounded by younger siblings who look at them with awe and curiosity and frustration sometimes, guided by people who know how being alive works with all its good parts and messy bits and who can tell what having so much power means when youre barely aware of how to use it or what to do. And maybe it helped to find out who their siblings were in a similar way, introducing themselves as they wanted, as they felt like, without a specific order, and learning to recognize each other as siblings with all the things that make them insufferable and all the things that make them the best and what makes them happy and what makes them angry and how they sound when theyre worried and how likely they are to chase you down to the other edge of the island for doing something stupid, and like real people they grow and develop and change and stay the same, and then they meet the memory of themselves from before becoming people and its...

Idk. Its like the realization of who they used to be and the distance between themselves and those selves, and the fact that they dont like them.

[bluetortoist]

A Step Out Of The Rabbit Hole

Characters: BTAS!Hugo Strange, mentions of BTAS!Mad Hatter/Jervis Tetch, and my BTAS!OC, Dear Alice/Eleanor Carole.

((This is set during a time when Dr. Hugo Strange had taken a job as a psychiatrist in Arkham Asylum. He had developed an interest in the mindset of Eleanor Carole aka "Dear Alice" and her alliance/relationship with the infamous, Jervis Tetch aka "The Mad Hatter". Hugo has already made numerous visits to Arkham working with patients, Jervis Tetch being among them. He has now been seeing Eleanor for a few sessions and is going to try a technique that would be able to bring her repressed memories back that have already been buried so deep down the rabbit hole.))

((OP Note: I wanted to do something a little different before answering more asks! I really wanted to finally shape how a conversation with Strange and Eleanor would go down while also trying to say that Eleanor, like the other rogues of course, isn't exactly that good of a person either. Sadly, I'm not that confident in my writing skills, but I know I can at least make dialogue. I hope you enjoy and I apologize if anyone's a little out of character.))

TW: mentions of domestic abuse, mentions of cheating, hypnotherapy used to bring up repressed memories, the usual kind of mindfuckery from Strange.

꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

Hugo: Alright dear, its time to go deep into your mind. Instead of fighting it, embrace it. You keep going in deeper and deeper...until you reach the very beginning...tell me what is it you see?

Eleanor: I remember....screaming...shouting. I don't know what it was about, but there was...a lot of screaming...Why is it so dark?

Oh...right...It's dark...because I'm under the sink

Hugo: What were you doing under the sink?

Eleanor: I was...hiding

Hugo: Hiding from what?

Eleanor: ....My parents. My biological parents. There-theres so much screaming a-and breaking.

Hugo: Why were you hiding?

Eleanor: I was scared I'd get caught. That theyd...get angry at me too. Scream at me. Break more things at me.

Hugo: Would they? They loved you, didn't they?

Eleanor: ...I dont know. I would hear them say they loved each other. They tried to tell me that too...but I felt more confused than anything.

Hugo: I see. Please explain, dear.

Eleanor: I looked at other kids families and I thought...what if their parents were that way too? Do they lie about how they felt like they did too? It didnt feel right. Their perents...didn't feel real. Then I thought that way when kids were with their siblings...then just...with people. Did I think this? When did people start feeling so alien to me?

Hugo: I can't be that suprised. It seems your childhood has played a bigger role onto your views of reality than I thought.

Eleanor: W-wait. It's getting blurry. What's happening?!

Hugo: It's alright, Eleanor. Your simply jumping foreward in your life. Your about to experience more repressed memories.

Eleanor: I remember...funeral. My parents funeral. Oh God it's going so fast now! I was put in-an orphanage. Im just by myself. New parents, but...I just remember being by myself. Oh! I'm in school now. *chuckle* I'm playing with my science kit....but I'm still...by myself?

Hugo: surely you made at least one friend or

two.

Eleanor: ...I did...at least-a few times. Then they all left. Or I left? I-it was either one or the other. But I do remember. Everytime, I felt...broken.

Hugo: It was very difficult for you to form connections with people, wasn't it?

Eleanor: It was...it sometimes felt I was in another world...Stop! STOP! I don't-I don't want to go any farther!

Hugo: Don't fight it Miss Carole! Let it in!....very good. Now what do you see now.

Eleanor: My...my boyfriend? I had a boyfriend back in college?

Hugo: Oh?

Eleanor: Ah...he came to me after he was rejected by someone else. I stayed with him but...I felt nothing for him.

Hugo: I see. Why did you do that?

Eleanor: I guess...I didn't want to be alone. I thought I'd be fine with it. Being with him. That I could learn to love him in time. But...I couldn't.

Hugo: .....

Eleanor: UGH! I'm jumping again, I'm-I'm at work now. Or well, my old workplace. Nothing has changed but- I feel so much more suffocated.

And theres...there's Jervis! We met at a bookstore. We're...talking. We're having fun with our talks.

He's offering to help me. And- and before I knew it...

I started to see him more and more...got to know him more...

Hugo: So...you were seeing Jervis...behind your boyfriends back?

Eleanor: ...yes...I was...I felt bad for him, I really did. I should have told him but...but...

Hugo: ....yes?

Eleanor: But...Wait, we're-we're fighting now. There's screaming. Just-just like my parents!

Hugo: With Jervis?

Eleanor: No! No my-my boyfriend. He's angry at me, hovering over me. He-he found out before I could say anything; He's trying to grab me! I-I feel like I can't breathe! I want to leave! I WANT TO LEAVE!

Hugo: No Eleanor! Your almost there! Face it! What happened!?

Eleanor: ....I killed him....n-no I...I nearly killed him. I ran away. Everything else is a blur, im just running and running and...

Wait, then... I found Jervis

...Please let me out, I'm done!

Hugo: Alright dear. You're going to slowly start surfacing back up. You're going to wake back up to consciousness. 3....2....1

Eleanor: *she proceeds to wake up from her hypnotherapy* ....

Hugo: Welcome back to the present, dear. Do you feel well? Any disorientation?

Eleanor: I...*sigh* I guess. But no. No, I feel fine.

Hugo: Good good. You did very well. But now that you remember again, what will you do now?

Eleanor: What I'll do? Well...I guess I am a little confused as to why he blocked those memories.

...But I don't care about all of that anymore. I don't feel upset about it suprisingly. This might sound mad, but...*heh* albeit, other than the criminal record I have now, I still can't help but feel like I'm in a better place now than where I used to be. Because of Jervis.

And I adore him for it~

Hugo: Hmm. Very interesting

Hugo: I can see why you would say that. You seem more expressive and you emotions feel less suppressed. I suppose whatever Tetch has done to your psyche hasn't been completely malicious to your perspective.

However...

Eleanor: ...However?

Hugo: However. I can't help but feel concerned about your attatchment Tetch. Regardless of your feelings, surely you can see how your codependency looks to the both of you, given his criminal records.

Eleanor: Codependency? what are you talking about?

Hugo: I'm wondering...Did Tetch ever tell you about his first criminal record involving his old colleague? About the one woman he kidnapped?

Eleanor: *confused* Yes. As a matter of fact, he did. What does this-

Hugo: Did he ever tell you why 'that' woman specifically? Or that that woman was named 'Alice' as well?

Eleanor: ...n-no. what-what are you getting at?

Hugo: I'm just concerned. I'm worried that Mr. Tetch has never moved on from that incident. That you are just another plaything for him to shape so he can feed more into his delusions.

Eleanor: No, thats not it at all. He changed me, yes, but if your trying to say he's taking advantage of me, your wrong! I remember now. That I used to be so sad with my life. In a way...Jervis saved me. He helped me in a way that I never knew that could when I was struggling for for years! And I love him for that. And he loves me.

Hugo: Are you sure about that? that he doesn't just like the idea of you? or, let me rephrase, Like the persona he shaped you into?

Eleanor: How dare you! Yes. Yes I'm-

Hugo: Is it REALLY any different than your old boyfriend of yours? You were there at the right time, the right place. Are you sure your not the 'second choice' again?

Eleanor: NO! NO ITS NOT! Whatever happened back then was said and done! What he did. To that woman. It can't be changed, I know. but he loves me NOW! He loves me for me!

Hugo: If he does, then why does he keep calling you 'Alice'?

Eleanor: ......

Hugo: I'm afraid that's all our time for today. But I hope you take all I said into consideration. I'm only wanting what's best for you. You have already been through so much. Do you understand?

Eleanor: ......

Hugo: Until our next visit... :)

꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷

IT WAS GETTING TOO HAPPY UP IN HERE, TIME FOR ANGST AGAIN! 😈))

[shoezuki]

Dya have any more headcanons for sampard?

Maybe ideas on how they fell for one another. Would you see it as an X fell first but Y fell harder or a flirting for fun but realising you've caught feelings?

Or have ya got an entirely different view on it! :D Oooooo. Do you perhaps have a timeline for how they traverse the "enemies" to friends to lovers stages.

Can you tell I love all your ideas and headcanons T-T

thankyou anon i am ghglg. im in love w u now. yes i have Many Ideas bout these two bastards like i have so many thoughts you cannot believe. like i have a post drafted where i write hcs when im bored and headin to class lkshglhg. heres some hcs

sampo falls in love first. very, very early in when he is new to the planet and is just drawing the attention of the silvermanes. It's not exactly some 'love at first sight' thing its more like the first time gep almost catches him sampo thinks 'oh he's cute' and a few times after that he's like 'wait im enjoying this. a lot.' and its downhill from there

whether sampo Realizes it is another thing tho. i can see him just enjoying the attention and thrill of evading the silvermanes and not realizing his disappointment when gepard isnt there is cuz hes infatuated w gepard.

but he Would realize it. at some point itd hit him like. why he enjoys the chase so much n lets himself Almost get caught. why hes memorized gep's schedule and where he patrols the most. and it hits him n hes like 'oh fuck. what the fuck. holy shit.... well anyways.'

(probably freaks out to seele over drinks but he's too incomprehensible through his tears n she has no clue what hes whining about)

Sampo flirts and teases gepard unabashedly, kisses grenades before throwing them into gep's arms, saying 'woah youre so strong geppie' while gep punches the wall behind him narrowly missing his face, leaves notes with lipstick marks on em at crime scenes, all that stuff.

but for sampo. it isnt supposed to actually Go anywhere. he knows he likes gepard more than he should and its kinda just to scratch that itch in his heart yknow.

sampo very much thinks that. gepard is the captain of the silvermanes, a wellknown and noble person in belobog, and sampo's a slimy secretive conman that just enjoys pushing the captains buttons. theres no hope for anything more so he might as well enjoy flustering the captain right?

gepard on the other hand. doesnt allow himself to really think of sampo as anything else but a criminal. it takes a long Long time for him to realize he even feels anythin for him

gepard does look forward to trying to bust sampo, though, in a sort of frustrated way. sometimes the front lines or patrols are so monotonous and sampo's tendency to appear whenever gep's bored out of his mind is impressive

he is insistant on arresting sampo and 'bringing him to justice' to an obsessive degree, though. he's not even typically assigned to investigating criminal cases but he has basically inserted himself into bein the lead investigator of any sampo related case now

(intelligence officers and detectives and other silvermane's are so used to it now. they could be investigating a house fire or a break in, find a note with lipstick marks on it and curly writing, and they all just sigh and call gepard.)

sometimes other worry that his insistence on arresting sampo and how dedicated to it is concerning. they ask why he hates sampo so much n he just says 'hes the most prolific criminal in belobog and needs to be apprehended'

(he cant say he hates him, though. for some reason. he cant figure out why he thinks about sampo so much. he just figures its to arrest him)

gep finds himself starting to relax when sampo sends him on wild goose chases n they both leave other guards in the dust. its probably not intentional, how sampo always seems to draw him away to somewhere quiet and secluded when his head is killing him or he's stressed or exhausted.

(its intentional)

sampo falls first, but gepard is absolutely the one who initiates.

i imagine it'd take... something for gepard to reconsider sampo and let himself think about sampo outside of his criminal record

during a chase out in the snow plains, just sampo laughing and taunting him as gep tries to hunt him down, they get bombarded by fragmentum monsters

sampo holds his own; he fights with a sort of viciousness gep has never seen from him. his bombs arent just smoke, but powerful explosives that shatter fragmentum. he's insanely fast and doesnt even break a sweat. but as soon as theyre all dead he pretends he's exhausted and that gep needs to carry him back to the city before giggling and vanishing.

gepard realizes that this whole time sampo has been holding back. he realizes that sampo could easily cut through the silvermanes, use his lethal bombs or easily outpace gepard and outrun him.

he starts thinking about other things sampo does; how natasha mentions he delivers medicine to him, how lynx sometimes talks about finding supplies and food in hidden ruins and obvious places around her camp, or the notes sampo leaves and how they sometimes give hidden hints about other criminal operations the silvermanes have been tryin to investigate.

he doesnt know what to make of it, what sampo wants or why he's doing this. the next time sampo sends him running through abandoned streets in belobog he slows down, realizes that sampo also slows to his pace so gepard keeps chasing him.

gepard asks point blank at some point, what in the hell sampo wants from him, why he's doing this. sampo doesnt know how to answer. just shrugs and says hes just trying to have some fun.

from then on gepard and sampo's 'chases' tend to... dissolve. sometimes gepard just sits down and takes a moment to forget about being the captain, to relax. Sampo acts like a skittish, stray cat who's ready to bolt until he eventually relaxes as sits by gepard too.

gepard collects all sampo's notes, all the fragments of his bombs with the hearts painted on metal shells, and keeps them as 'evidence' in his desk.

sampo pushes his luck constantly; as soon as gepard relaxes or gives him any room to get closer, he takes and takes as much as he can get.

gepard catches sampo, entirely on accident, when he's off duty. climbing out of a window or something. and sampo freezes but gepard just says 'hey i'm not working now, i can't arrest you.'

(they both know it's a lie. being out of uniform never stopped gepard before.)

sampo starts just appearing more and more around gepard when he's off duty, showing up walking alongside him like he's been there the whole time, or just 'passing by' when gep is in the florist's shop.

gepard leaves his window open. sampo takes the invitation and crawls in and strange hours when gepard cant sleep. he just sits on the couch or a chair or stands there like he is a foreign intruder. gepard just nods and makes him some tea.

when it would hit gepard, that he's in love with sampo and has been for a while, he'd just blurt it out. 'huh. i think ive fallen in love with you'. and sampo would erupt into flames and kiss him so hard his lips bruise

[fictionfixations]

black butler emerald witch arc episode 2 thoughts

spoilers for the entirety of the arc (ive read the manga!) and some other stuff seriously though you have been warned. i try not to outright say it but still

i missed this when first watching the op but isnt this that one scene that happens when they go back out, theres crying and then THAT 💀

i know im like two days late to this but i forgor

i took like a break from anime so now i keep forgetting to check back in a week for the next episode 😭

what a cutie pie

i wonder if those chairs are comfy. im sure the bottom is fine but the back? or is it like a elegant design, comfort not so much? actually i bet theyre hella cold 💀

im prone to missing details so im trying to look at as many things as i can

god i hate foot binding so much the thought just makes me sick

and im sure there are people who like it and respect it and practice it and stuff just not for me

LMAO the silent pause with the windows turning from light to dark

jesus christ sebastian youve just been standing there??

like im sure thats expected of like normal servants but just imagining the pain my feet would be in 😭

i never realized her hair was tinted green at the end

sorry what did he just say

oh ??? but.. but why write out the german 😭😭😭 like. like we know hes speaking german thats why there are jp characters underneath telling jp viewers what it means but ???? like i mean id expect german in captions to be there for germans but im on english captions so im so confused 💀

give him a break sebastian 😭

you know exactly why the other servants arent exactly good at their jobs

tbh its kind of the same thing actually 💀? although i think wolfram might actually be good at cooking just very very slow (and in turn making it all very very cold)

also like listen man its hard to focus on so many things at once while cooking its a lot

i just had the cruelest thought

we know the trio really care about like ciel and sebastian its like home right but like

how are they gonna react when its revealed ah yes so now sebastian is gonna eat ciel's soul and stuff

and like they care about sebastian too yknow? but like.. now conflict. because they're meant to protect ciel, they care about him, and sebastian was also the one who brought them there (with the exception of maybe? finny and tanaka, i cant remember who of the two brought up bringing finny with them, but tanaka has been there before all that) and brought them out of like their horrible lives so they feel very grateful to him for this life they have now, this like found family, but like

i just wonder how they'll react, once its all over

with ciel gone, sebastian also gone because he doesnt need to be there anymore, and then where do they go? it was that household that taught them that they can be more than weapons or tools or anything less than human, that they can be human and do domestic duties even if they arent the best at it, to learn to smile again

that brought them into a home free of judgment

and then where do they go after that?

you know sometimes i hate my brain for thinking these things

sorry i got like so distracted

precious

aughhhhhhh i hate that she cant run she has to rely on someone else to pick her up

i wonder if wolfram was contemplating whether itd be better to take them with him or if itd be worse to let them stay in the castle unmonitored

hate that a child has so much responsibility on her why must you show her such injury 😭

but WHY just her you cant tell me only a kid knows, someone taught her and i very much doubt theyre dead if you know immediately what to pull out to treat something like that

...who am i kidding, i know why i hate it anyway 😭

STOPP PUTTING ALL THIS WEIGHT ON HER IM GONNA THROW HANDS

YOUR HONOR SHE IS A CHILD LEAVE HER ALONE

i dont even think there are people her age around

this is her first time having a kid around her LEAVE HER ALONE

do you have no shame blaming a literal child? if anything you should tell it to the ADULT like wth 😭

ah yes threaten the child

WOW

sebastian dont entertain it tell her he has a fiancee already 😭😭😭

tbh i forgot ciel cant actually understand what theyre saying so oop

and this doesnt apply to wolfram why? like is he not a man? like i mean id hate it if it did but like okay so the only other male you know, that does not apply to him why? or is it because hes a servant? so like for example like baldroy wouldnt, but so the two who arent that it would apply to?? i mean she did say earlier that she was referring to two as in ciel and sebastian so maybe thats why

off topic that dress looks so fun to wear. maybe uncomfy layers but FUN

actually wait how do they have children if theres no men

cmon think why is the only child sullivan and everyone else is an adult, with the only elder we've seen so far like that person who was yelling 🤔

SEBASTIAN.

OHHH MY GOD

poor ciel unaware of how his butler is misrepresenting him so

she looks pretty with her hair down 🥺

!!!

so you know???? what if they were not as kind like dude please be more cautious holy shit you dont know them

LMAO NOT ME NOTICING THIS IN THE OP AND THEN THIS SCENE HAPPENS IN THE EPISODE

also like yesterday i got soap in my eyes so im just crying and trying to get it to stop and holy fuck OW that shit hurts man so i hella sympathize

knowing whats next im wondering if i look away or keep watching

OH IT ENDS BEFORE THEN LMAO

just cliffhanger to sebastian crying 'why are they crying' someone may wonder

I WONDER

i thought itd cliffhanger when it went back to ciel but nope okay no answer on wtf this is just that for some reason theyre crying and thats all anime watchers know.

[the-bonfires-ember]

ive been thinking about that thing people say about mental illness. yknow, 'its not a part of your personality' 'dont make it your identity' etc

but when you have a personality disorder, that doesnt really make sense anymore.

which makes my feelings on cluster b pride flags a little conflicted. coz, sure, it is fundamentally a part of your personality and certainly shapes your identity, but something about pride flags has always been off to me. perhaps especially as a person with aspd.

now, sure, on the one hand i get it. theres something appealing about having that kind of validation that you arent alone, especially when you are constantly masking and shifting who you are to fit the situation best.

we might have antisocial personality disorder but we are still, at our core, social creatures. we still desire community, we're just also afraid of it.

so yeah, a banner of community and others 'like us' seems fair enough, right?

BUT

theres still something... off to me about it. what it was, exactly, only came to me after a discussion with my partner about DID and PluralKit - yeah i know, im diving into plural drama now, lfg i guess

they showed me an infographic about the process of DID recovery which showed the progression from very disconnected and separated identities to a more blended 'final fusion' (a term they take issue with but thats a different story). i said that PluralKit must be confusing for people on the later ends of the spectrum they were showing me because, at that point, how do you tell who is blending with who? when the lines are blurry, how do you know who to tag yourself as? it seemed like an inhibitor to recovery if you were constantly cutting yourselves off from each other. (this is not me saying anything one way or the other about plurals and recovery in DID or whatever the fuck else, im just using this as an example. stfu i dont care about your opinions on any of this so dont waste your breath)

i think my feelings on aspd flags is somewhat similar. coz i mean, they are pride flags, right? and i think if you are taking pride in being aspd then you are far more likely to lean into your symptoms, and i think thats a slippery slope to go down and has just a very 'anti-recovery' vibe, if you know what i mean.

with that all said, i also very much think that if you dont want to recover, you dont have to. i dont think you can force anyone to recover and i dont think you should even try to. recovery is fucking shit and its hard and if you arent ready for it, you are just going to hurt whoever you are trying to make recover.

but i also think that you can have that opinion, whilst also being a voice for recovery, and be against 'anti-recovery' thinking.

because look, like it or not aspd is a fucking disorder. and at some point that becomes unhelpful or it wouldnt be a disorder. symptoms of aspd are debilitating and pretending otherwise that helps nobody. especially with all the 'all pwASPD are evil' scum out there.

so yes, i think the pride flags are... unhelpful at best and harmful at worst. but what about the other stuff? the creatures alla tbh creature and the plushiedreadful rabbit? (i think both of those designs suck btw but thats not the point)

idk those feel like they are in a different category. theres not really a sense of pride in those, more a sense of comfort. again, community, but also a sort of softness(??) that the pride flag things seem to miss - especially when they are like 'vampire aspd' or 'evil aspd' or any of the other bullshit things ive seen out there. i guess they are also just way more 'mental illness' coded than pride flags are.

pride flags have always been a 'we're here and theres nothing wrong with us' kind of thing. but the creatures and the bears are more lighthearted and sort of making fun of the conditions a little bit. highlighting symptoms and coping mechanisms. just look at the imocreature - specifically the worm one which is my favourite - and the way its able to be so pathetic looking and cute. its not meant to be cool or badass or whatever else, its just a lil guy that gets sad without supply.

which, yknow, relatable.

[fagcifer]

[come around. sped up] pulling the tape measure with my eyes closed to pull out a ridiculous length and girth, and assign that as ciels dick size. i want it to tear through sams stomach and up his throat actually. i want to kill sam one way or another after all^^

anyways, role reverse au! amirite ?!!?!?!?

hi chat its another sam post, again. im getting bashful posting about him. like... thats my wife chat... this is rather intimate (*´▽｀*) /silly.

for someone who particularly enjoys looking at shoes, i sure as hell dont draw them much.

i left their plot vague for a few reasons; wiggle room and potential to add more. its mostly just going to be cool tropes i saw and liked. nothing will be too set in stone, more so a common theme that might reoccur every now and then.

basic premise of the au that vaguely follows the 'canon', urrrr;

samael volkov, mid 30s, calm and collected, doesnt tolerate rudeness. french-slavic and a normal human. smokes, and drinks socially. cold hands.

ciel, looks to be in his mid 20s but act somewhat immature; hot and cold. one hell of a drinker but never seems to get drunk and never fail to make a disgusted expression whenever he sips on his alcohol. ขี้หนาว, easily cold despite the literal and metaphorical air of coldness that permeate from his very pores.

ciel sporadically frequents the bar that sam works at, usually with a dark expression on his face; a tick in his jaw and furrowed brows. sams bar, [punny name here], just so happens to be where a lot of stubborn souls running away from death tends to flee to. Last drink before death eat them alive or whatever.

ciel and sam became reluctant acquaintances simply because sam was trying to keep track of the patron that often took a tipsy person home, only for said person to be declared missing and presumed dead. only the lucky(?) few made it out alive, a former shell of themselves.

sam surprisingly didnt tip the police about ciel ,but its not like they could do anything either— they seem to be rather tight-lipped with the disappearances in the area. thats what got ciel curious about sam.

wanted to make tipping a thing, but it doesnt make sense anywhere else that paid their employees livable wage. but tipping is always nice! (additionally, the setting could be in canada. since to my understanding, theres a good population of french speaking people and the other let them. and its cold too.)

(nevermind, tipping is a thing but frown upon by businesses. its as if the customers are implying that they arent paying their employees enough, hence the tipping— a fun dynamic, i thunk!)

i did make sams design intentionally bland. the piercings were purely self-indulgent, i really wanted to fuck his ears. believe me when i say that i wanted to incorporate the red stripes from his original design but it was too flashy for what i had in mind.

derailing here, but i do plan to eventually draw a reimagined design for btd2 sam and zeitgeist sam. though he probably wouldnt be blue since ciel is already navy blue. blue on blue cannibalism. the designs wont be anything too remarkable or unique, im not creative.

never saw a tweet, pointed and barked this loudly in excitement before. thats how much i like the tweet, sowwy💔

initially ciel was supposed to have a more cryptid/entity like feel too him, but i got carried away??? who wouldve thunk. but then again, i draw on a whim without any firm planning, so its only natural to get completely off topic. rather telling of me, but anyways.

i do want to incorporate the other people from the archangel corp. but im going one small step at a time! and planning is hard for me chat💔

jumpscare !!!!! close-ups because i think theyre cute＼(^_^)／

i know one thing and its the pale hair/dark complexion trope. guess whos the father and whos the son!?!?!??!?!! for fuck sake they even have the same jaw shape💔💔💔

i make life so damn difficult for myself. theres no absolutely no reason other than swag to give them hair like that. drawing and colouring is already difficult enough, imagine making dolls out of them💔💔💔