the intense dread gnawing at my chest isnt enough i need to combust into flames. proship please block me
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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help a trans person in need
hey, again. i'm sorry to end the year like this, but i need help again. i need some money for my utility and my phone so i can keep doing doordash making money until i start my new job next month. i also couldn't doordash this week because i've been sick.
my utility bill is due in TWO days and my bank is negative. i need at least $120 for that alone. if you could please donate or reblog i would greatly appreciate it.
i have paypal, but that is currently even further in the negatives at -$72.38. i've been really stretched at my limit as you can see.
please help me 🙏 i need $330 overall
$0/$330
cashapp - $hellishqueer venmo - hellishqueer
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i may have an aneurysm (seriously, ive gone into cardiac arrest 4 times this year)
i have nothing saved, paycheck wont come in and im almost out of groceries
anything helps, even just reblogging
please
$0/$300 CAD
Payp@l is: [email protected]
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Still fuming over there not being a single female character introduced in the winter wave of 2009 (when gendered tribes were no longer a thing) so I choose to headcanon the Zesk and Vorox sets as being female members of their respective subspecies so it's not literally just Kiina as the sole female set of the entire year.
#kiina is also generally the only female character on bara/spherus magna period. not just as set but as a named main or side character#the only other ones are the sisters of the skrall; annona; and sahmad's dead iron tribe lover#sahmad's dead iron tribe lover is sahmad's dead iron tribe lover. as in thats literally everything known about her#the sisters of the skrall are unfortunately inconsequential; nameless; and literally brain dead by their second appearance#and aside from annona not being even mentioned as female at any point and being of dubious canonicity (like sahmad's lover ig)#i admit i personally dislike her concept and everything related to her. so to me specifically she doesnt count at all#this is partially why vastus is a trans woman to me and why my concepts for the other agori leaders are 3 women and 1 enby#also youre SO right about nektann. skakdi females are said to be larger and more aggressive and a warlord wouldve been perfect to show that
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Shuffling steps nudged Vastus out of his torpor, though he stubbornly tried to cling to at least the illusion of sleep; he curled tighter around Tarix, grumbling against his husband's shoulder as his arms pressed on the slight bump of her stomach.
The clacking of short claws on the floor was, alas, too distracting to ignore. The Glatorian growled loudly in an inquisitive tone.
Gresh waited a little, playing with his fingers.
"Is it a bad time?" he asked at last.
"We're dressed and not doing any gross stuff if that's what you're asking," his aunt replied tiredly. He cracked an eye open, furrowing his brows when he struggled to make out the younger Lebori in the dark. "What damn hour is it?"
"Uhm, it's not dawn yet."
Vastus squinted at him.
"Hawklet - what dark, sinister nightmare force dug directly out of the worst slums of Plude compelled you to come wake me up at this fucking time of night?"
"Us," Tarix corrected with a mumble, eyes closed.
Her wife gently smacked his hand on her face: "You get back to sleep, he's my nephew."
"I would if you weren't so loud," the Gaquri replied. "Also he's been my nephew for about twenty thousand years, too, in case you forgot."
"Shush. Gresh, really, what's wrong?"
The younger Glatorian grimaced and shuffled in place again, shifting on his feet.
He lowered his head and flattened, feathers glued to his head, and finally managed to whisper, at a volume barely above that of a breath: "Does the first time hurt?"
Vastus blinked in puzzlement once he strained his ears enough to actually hear him.
"Well..." he began softly, still baffled, "A little, it can happen - but it doesn't have to, you just need to be careful."
"And what... What are you supposed to do?" the younger Lebori pressed on: "To be careful?"
His aunt squinted: "Why are you asking."
The plumes that made up Gresh's hair poofed briefly in embarrassment. He furrowed his expression, tawny skin no doubt turning darker under the cover of his down and the shadows: "It's a normal thing for someone my age!"
"Not for you," the other cut him off. "You don't like accidentally hearing these things, I don't see why you'd want to talk about them all of a sudden. In the middle of the night, too."
"It's closer to morning than evening."
"If I don't see any sunlight it's the middle of the night. Now don't change the topic."
"I just... I just need to know, to- to be ready."
"For what?"
"For when I have to."
Very unpleasant thoughts squirmed to life inside Vastus and Tarix's brains, stiffening their muscles as if readying a pounce.
Gresh had always been very adamant about what he would and wouldn't allow when it came to his person: in the latter list figured first and foremost someone considering themselves his parent, and his body being handled in any too intimate way. The mere thought of intercourse seemed to gross him out as powerfully as the awful stench and disgusting taste of Thornax stew did, if not even more so, and he was very quick to leave when the topic came around.
His face made it very plain that his opinion on the matter hadn't changed - but then, what was with that wording?
"What do you mean, 'when I have to'?" his aunt asked carefully. They weren't in dire straits, the pregnancy was only inching towards its first five months... The hypothesis of a coercion of some kind sat unwelcome on his sternum.
The younger Glatorian tried to shrug as he bristled, but it came out too stiff as fluster overwhelmed him: "It's just, I - you said we used to be way more before the Core War, and now we're way less, so we're all going to have to make children to get back to those numbers, and I'm fairly young, so eventually I'll also have to--"
Vastus wheezed a sigh of relief loud enough to cover his ramblings: "Pro Certavi amore - Gresh, Gresh, listen to me," and he grasped the hand the prosthetic fingers the young man was torturing in a gentle grip, "Relax. Nobody died and made you the only person who can bring forth the repopulation effort. You're good. You don't have to do anything. Go back to sleep."
"Yes I do!" his nephew insisted: "I'm young, I-I could have a lot of-"
"I promise nobody is holding you at sword-point about that. You don't even like it! There's no need to push yourself into it if the thought makes you vomit. That's just common sense."
"How would you know if I don't like it? I've never tried!"
"Do you want to?"
Gresh pursed his lips in an anguished grimace.
"Exactly."
"It's not if I want to-"
"If you say you have to I'm swatting your face."
"But it's true."
"No it's not - kid, seriously, other people can handle it. Your uncle and I already made your cousin. Ti's growing at a snail pace right now as we speak."
"But it would be dangerous for you to have another one."
"Yes, yes, we know that, but do you think we're the only ones who waited until now to have a baby?" Vastus argued. "You have no idea how many people who want kids have been sitting patiently through the storm until they could start having them since before the Shattering happened. You're living proof some couldn't even wait while in Bara Magna, which was one of the worst times and places to make a little one."
His nephew's feathers fluttered anxiously. Before he could try to argue again, though, a scaled hand gently gripped his wrist.
Tarix didn't raise his eyelids nor his head, but his tired voice was clear either way: "You're too young, you got cheated out of this... But the thing about child rearing is that two people alone can't do this, you see. These kids that will come, they'll need all the help they can get - siblings, cousins, teachers, older friends, more experienced students... Adults who aren't their parents... You've got a lot of work cut out for you already. Don't feel like you have to add onto that."
Her thumb dug kindly into the down feathers to rub at the bony arm beneath them, offering comfort. She could feel the tension that refused to leave Gresh in his still stiff muscles, in how they twitched subtly and refused to give in to her reassurances.
The Gaquri cracked an eye open: "You know what's the worst that could happen?"
She watched the kid's ears flicker: "What is it?" he whispered.
"You end up like Ackar, who's never had kids nor hoes his entire life and has been doing just fine."
Vastus snorted.
Gresh furrowed his brows, head tilting.
"You said the worst," he mumbled.
Tarix shrugged, grinning: "I mean, to end up like Ackar you'd also have to get your shoulder blade vaporized, your whole arm rotten off, your back turned into a minefield, and a very unfortunate tendency to backflip all the time, so you'd have other slugs to fry."
That did manage to tear a little snicker from her nephew.
"And the best that could happen is that I get over all of... This?" he asked, gesturing vaguely to the side.
His uncle hummed: "If that's what you need to do to be happy, yes."
"Or the best that could happen is you don't get over it," her wife mused, "And it ends up making you happy either way."
"That too, that too."
Vastus reached out to pinch the younger Lebori's when he made an unsure face: "It's too soon for you to figure it out all at once in one night, anyways," he reassured him. He hissed a giggle at the displeased grimace he got back and cupped one of his cheeks, Tarix doing the same for the other: "You've got all the time in the world. No need to rush."
Gresh, for once, didn't answer.
He leaned into their palms, eyes shut, letting them sustain his head as he breathed deeply. He grabbed their wrists and buried himself into their hands with a soft whine: his prosthetic fingers felt familiar against feathers and scales.
"Did that help?" Vastus asked.
The Lebori nodded into his hand.
Tarix leaned a little further and pressed a kiss to his nephew's head: "Good. Now get the fuck back to sleep, hawklet."
Gresh snorted. The Gaquri made a weird gross sound - a sort of 'bleaugh' - to protest the younger Glatorian apparently wiping his nose on his palm, and pulled away to leave his head sustained only by his aunt.
The older Lebori snickered at them; he caught his nephew's feathery ear between his fingers and pulled it a little towards himself.
"Over here, kid," he murmured kindly. "Hope you're not too old to snuggle."
The Gaquri hummed in fake discontent as he turned a little, allowing Gresh to carefully crawl over his body: "Excuse you, don't you have a pregnant husband to cuddle already?"
"I've cuddled her enough these past few days," her wife laughed before kissing Gresh's forehead as he settled between them, face nestled into his aunt's clavicles while the two older Glatorian wrapped around him protectively: "I think our big baby needs it more than you do, tonight."
"So long as he takes a page from his cousin's book and lets us sleep..." his husband mused.
"Shut up," a muffled voice grumbled.
They nuzzled into his still red tipped plumes, chirping and gurgling and cooing at him as if he were a small child; gracefully, he allowed them to have their fun.
They continued until their nephew's breaths were even, deep and slow, his muscles slack, his expression peaceful.
They curled a little more around him, hoping he could feel their heartbeats.
#bionicle#vastus#tarix#gresh#random writing#comfort and reassure your local sex-repulsed teen... NOW!!!!!#a family can be a 45-50yo t4t couple their adopted teen nephew their to-be-born child and the beloved work friend they like to make fun of#i feel stupid sharing this bc who else is gonna read this. literally no one. nobody gives a shit abt the glatorian post canon or whatever#unfortunately my brain is like a camping ground with a bar they go to every night and theyre just settled there for a while. fucking hell#pregnancy mention#forgot it might be someones squick so (thumbs up) there
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"And This Tree Is My Grave"
"So then...whose ghost are you?"
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I’m doing a commission sale! Basic info is that for the next batch (3 slots) I will be giving a 25% off on any commission type. Just put “25MAS” in the “extra questions” section of the google form. See the link in my bio for more info on my commissions.
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(12/11) 380/1070
(12/8) 344/1070
It's december ! Everything is bad !
Turns out that being a disabled (statusless) immigrant trans woman in a conservative country is not easy ! It's been over a year w/ no luck in job hunting. I'm 100s of applications in, with only a handful of interviews to show for it (and only early on from when I was still detransitioning and deadnaming myself for them, which I am no longer willing to do.)
Currently I'm paying roughly $1070 a month for rent, bills, daily intake medicine, food. I'm no longer able to pay off my credit card and the shitty % I have will eat into everything further.
Quite frankly I just need any help I can get. No clue where else I can turn, and I'm scared about that. Thanks, y'all.
K*FI | P*PAL (@/fallhound)
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you are a worn ga-matoran sailor who wakes up after a massive memory black out and the first thing that you see is the snout of this massive blue-armored horrifying misshapen vaguely rahi-like thing staring directly at you who licks your mask, drops what is possibly a dead lizard on your lap, tells you to "ENJOY ENTERTAINMENT BABY" and leaves you in a pile of equally baffled ga-matoran with equally dead lizards on their lap. how does that make you feel
they would probably do this to the mata and mahri as well... not the hagah or others, just them. those are Their Toa. they Raised Them. they need Cleaning and Cuddling after a Big Scare. some might just accept this (Onua) and some might try to unsuccessfully claw away from their grasp in horror and disgust (Nuparu)
theyd also be helped by glatorian and agori alike, since theyre not mind controlled - though they probably wouldnt really like their tendency to store the matoran away since they need to like keep count of them somehow. tarix leaves one minute and comes back to like 13 missing matoran and kiina gelu and gresh wrangling a howling matau out of the nest he definitely shoved them into for safekeeping. its the fifth time in two hours sir please weve talked about this (onewa tries using this distraction to drag hewkii away and is promptly tackled to the ground)
Half silly and half serious idea for your Transformed Turaga AU idea. Or maybe it's silly on the surface while serious as the groundwork?
Most of it is still pretty vague, but I have some scenes of the Toa Hordika wrecking shop in what I assume a corrupt Great Being's lab. Not necessarily Velika, because the technology is a variant of mind control using somebody's greatest desire.
And as usual with the Toa Metru or Hordika, it's chaos. There's the stuff like Nokama operating a set of levers and rerouting water flow to flood a room, wrecking the delicate machinery there.
Or opening locks not meant to be opended. Maybe it's the waterlock! Nokama surveys her work from underwater, satisfied.
Matau bites a security drone, and its programming soon begins to corrupt.
The technology to control them either doesn't work at all or somehow they adapt to it. Soon enough even a touch of them is enough to destroy it, but that's less fun than tearing it open when possible.
They at one point literally tear a whole workshop apart. Very therapeutic, they will tell you.
Whenua's sitting on a cliff over an entrance where the Great Being just rushed, seeing to their horror that he's sitting next to something delicate and important. He makes eye contact as he pushes the object over and it's impossible to catch before it shatters on the floor.
"Whoops."
And that's not even going into any combination of the Hordika enabling each other and becoming even more chaotic.
i remember seeing this in reblogs and it wasnt really something i had ideas about but i do wholly condone elder furry violence on mind controlling objects and i do love slapstick
id imagine this is a final gambit of the great beings who are Shitting Their Pants upon all other attempts at stopping the mu beings failing (badly) and it STILL fails because hordika coding or something doesnt respond to it bc they never accounted for hordika existing so they have no counter. "oh but theyre only six" one of them says, Unaware Of Who The Metru Are And What Their Modus Operandi Is, "theres no way a few stupid animals can stop us". comes back in the room to every piece of extremely valuable and delicate machinery ripped to shreds and six werebeasts eating the fibre optic cables like extremely large noodles. thats what you fucking get
they start off scared as shit for the situation and the pressure but end up having a magnificent time. so much shit that feels so good to crack and beat the shit out of AND theyre allowed to do that!! required even!!! theyre healing from things they didnt even know they had. this is their new home. great beings evicted forever and ever. hordika city now
matau has been parkouring everywhere he shouldnt and no windows are safe from him. onewa found a new artistic vein and has been gingerly breaking as much shit as possible to find the right pieces for his sculptures. vakama has been mauling every single drone and robot he finds with his teeth. nuju is methodically shredding important documents to make snow out of them. whenua has been digging holes in the pavements and walls and busting the air ducts by crawling through them. nokama has caused more water-related destructive mishaps than anybody can count. they are so so proud of themselves and having a grand old time. the nuva, mahri, hagah and mata nui are hollering at them in support after getting snapped out of mind control. the agori and glatorian are impressed. the great beings are in shambles and within minutes of having their asses viciously bitten by extremely large werebeasts
#bionicle#its more likely that theyd treat the matoran like injured or sickly specimens since they dont have parental instincts#but also its too funny and cute to pass up so fuck it youre so right. their cubs now#nuparu strikes me as sort of awkward when it comes to contact so whenua sitting on him for cleaning n cuddles would be Embarrassment Hell#theyd prob do this to mata nui too... once everybodys accounted for. swarm him n start bathing him aggressively. he has no complaints
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The Chain I Forged In Life
"I am here to-night to warn you that you have yet a chance and hope of escaping my fate. A chance and hope of my procuring, Ebenezer.”
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Half silly and half serious idea for your Transformed Turaga AU idea. Or maybe it's silly on the surface while serious as the groundwork?
Most of it is still pretty vague, but I have some scenes of the Toa Hordika wrecking shop in what I assume a corrupt Great Being's lab. Not necessarily Velika, because the technology is a variant of mind control using somebody's greatest desire.
And as usual with the Toa Metru or Hordika, it's chaos. There's the stuff like Nokama operating a set of levers and rerouting water flow to flood a room, wrecking the delicate machinery there.
Or opening locks not meant to be opended. Maybe it's the waterlock! Nokama surveys her work from underwater, satisfied.
Matau bites a security drone, and its programming soon begins to corrupt.
The technology to control them either doesn't work at all or somehow they adapt to it. Soon enough even a touch of them is enough to destroy it, but that's less fun than tearing it open when possible.
They at one point literally tear a whole workshop apart. Very therapeutic, they will tell you.
Whenua's sitting on a cliff over an entrance where the Great Being just rushed, seeing to their horror that he's sitting next to something delicate and important. He makes eye contact as he pushes the object over and it's impossible to catch before it shatters on the floor.
"Whoops."
And that's not even going into any combination of the Hordika enabling each other and becoming even more chaotic.
i remember seeing this in reblogs and it wasnt really something i had ideas about but i do wholly condone elder furry violence on mind controlling objects and i do love slapstick
id imagine this is a final gambit of the great beings who are Shitting Their Pants upon all other attempts at stopping the mu beings failing (badly) and it STILL fails because hordika coding or something doesnt respond to it bc they never accounted for hordika existing so they have no counter. "oh but theyre only six" one of them says, Unaware Of Who The Metru Are And What Their Modus Operandi Is, "theres no way a few stupid animals can stop us". comes back in the room to every piece of extremely valuable and delicate machinery ripped to shreds and six werebeasts eating the fibre optic cables like extremely large noodles. thats what you fucking get
they start off scared as shit for the situation and the pressure but end up having a magnificent time. so much shit that feels so good to crack and beat the shit out of AND theyre allowed to do that!! required even!!! theyre healing from things they didnt even know they had. this is their new home. great beings evicted forever and ever. hordika city now
matau has been parkouring everywhere he shouldnt and no windows are safe from him. onewa found a new artistic vein and has been gingerly breaking as much shit as possible to find the right pieces for his sculptures. vakama has been mauling every single drone and robot he finds with his teeth. nuju is methodically shredding important documents to make snow out of them. whenua has been digging holes in the pavements and walls and busting the air ducts by crawling through them. nokama has caused more water-related destructive mishaps than anybody can count. they are so so proud of themselves and having a grand old time. the nuva, mahri, hagah and mata nui are hollering at them in support after getting snapped out of mind control. the agori and glatorian are impressed. the great beings are in shambles and within minutes of having their asses viciously bitten by extremely large werebeasts
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wonder if some matoran gain types upon becoming toa? obvious example is matoro (ghost-ice because the death flags taped to his face arent enough) but i dont know if hewkii might count as fighting-rock or if vakama would also qualify for a fire type becoming fire-psychic upon toa-volution since i think krakua mentioned the visions preceded toahood. speaking of krakua his type should be normal since most sound-based moves are normal and his ability should be soundproof so hes immune to them
going back to the mahri, would they develop a common ability upon becoming amphibious? something like swift swim (boosts speed in rain), water veil (prevents burning), dry skin (gets hp back from water moves, loses them in harsh sunlight) or hydration (gets hp back from rain) or some other. water toa could have these too... i could see helryx having developed torrent (boosts water moves when hp low) bc shes super old and about to fall apart really badly so she puts her all in her last attempts
since skakdi can only activate their powers in pairs it means theyre locked in permanent multi battle mode, which is sort of funny bc usually trainer types who only do multi battles are like couples, twins, reporter & cameraman, people who have a pleasant relationship. which the skakdi generally Do Not Have with one another
maybe the makuta also change types with their form... the makuta mistika are all dark-bug, the makuta phantoka are dark-flying, and miserix went dark-dragon. vortixx could be poison-steel? or poison-fairy... not sure steltians. it would make it interesting if they were pure steel, and so roodaka managed to get sidorak out of the picture despite being at a severe type disadvantage
Pokemon AU but the GSR inhabitants have pokemon moves or the equivalent of. The thing is that I love Pokemon's environmental storytelling, while I want to keep the unique atmosphere and designs of Bionicle. So, this is more a game and mental exercise.
Mata Nui's is capable of using Cosmic Power. "The user absorbs a mystical power from space to raise its Defense and Sp. Def stats."
Pokemon who learn this power usually come from space or are thought to do so. They also have often mystical associations / connections. All of which fits Mata Nui on a narrative as well in-universe level.
The only other GSR inhabitants capable of using Cosmic Power are the Toa Mata / Toa Nuva. It shows their mystical connection to him, reflects their unique status and connection to their elements, how they are seen as legends, and references how they fall from the sky.
Please feel free to add your own headcanons!
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Attention!
My buddy, @perish-the-creator, is offering some emergency writing commissions due to personal reasons!
If you’re interested in some top notch fics, I strongly recommend them!
Here is also a link to their Kofi!
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"Turaga, are you here?"
Vakama turned slightly without rising from his chair, still engrossed by the mask he was carefully checking for defects: "Takanuva?"
"I came for the Suletu," the voice replied from further away.
The Suletu? Ah, yes, of course - of course, he remembered. He stood up and hurried to one of the shelves in the room: the fixed kanohi shimmered faintly in the warm light of the new forges, almost sickly, grey hue shifting from dark metal to shining silver as he climbed upon a stood to get it down.
"How is Krakua?" the mask maker asked. The six of them had seemed awfully concerned by his condition.
"There's one full healthy limb still left!"
Vakama sighed: "Don't let him get around," he ordered, "Or he'll never get fixed up."
"Oh, the Mahri would certainly blow a fuse if that happened," Takanuva laughed rather earnestly. "They're mad enough about the surgeries and everything already. And Hewkii wouldn't approve of Nuparu's wheeled chair being used to get around with a busted arm that needs rest."
"And I'll have to side with him," the Turaga noted. He dusted off some of the faint soot that had deposited on the mask as he added: "I'd never made a Suletu before. It was a fun exercise."
"You made it? It'll be an honor to wear it, then."
"I hope so," he tried to say, but the words died halfway out of his throat when he turned.
A naked face with pale sulfur eyes stared back at him from its seat.
An arm was locked in a sort of contraption, and one of the calves was a noticeably different color from the rest of the body; little scars gave several joints a strange look, almost marbled.
One of its eyelids was stuck between open and closed.
"This is one of my favorite tricks!" Takanuva's voice said in a chipper tone as it came out of the mouth that was not Takanuva's. "Nobody else likes it."
Vakama remained as still as a statue for a few more seconds.
"Another one I do all the time is muting all sound coming from me while I follow others along," Krakua continued as he slowly dropped the imitation and eased in his own rotten, crackling voice: "Nobody likes that one either."
"I can see why," the mask maker replied softly.
Hands reached out towards him. He jolted away; then he remembered. The mask. Of course.
"You don't need to be so jumpy," Krakua told him when the Suletu was placed in his palms. He caressed it gently, fondly, bringing it as close to his face as possible and moving it in front of his eyes as though he was trying to take in every smallest detail. "You're not a Toa without armor in a chamber of swords anymore."
Vakama did not relax.
As a matter of fact, he tensed further.
He felt small again. Terribly small, terribly frail, scared out of his wits, unable to move, to think, to even approximate a single idea.
The Toa of Sonics placed the kanohi on his face and grimaced.
Was there something wrong with it? Had he messed something up?
No, that was... Ridiculous. It worked perfectly. Just... Perfectly. Mostly. Hold on.
He noticed the sudden change because it would have been impossible not to. It was like a pair of scopes had been applied to his eyes and more and more lenses were being piled up within them to adjust his perspective in real time, in a sort of stunted, awkward manner, as if whoever was running the test on him wasn't used to the strange instrument they were using.
The anxiety biting down on him wavered with each clumsy attempt until it finally dissipated. Everything was small now - everything was just as tall as him: Krakua suddenly didn't appear so towering, so frightening, from the top of his wheeled chair.
In a strange roundabout way, he almost felt like a Matoran.
"You have a very visual mind," he told Vakama as he scratched his neck: "I can't see well, I'm not used to this sort of thing. It's a bit hard to work with."
"You can manipulate me," the Turaga said - in a strangely calm tone, he was surprised to discover. This wasn't the first time someone had done that, after all. Maybe the first time someone had admitted to it so plainly, that it could have been. "I thought a Mask of Telepathy only read thoughts, not influenced them."
"Hm. It does that - read them, I mean, not control them," Krakua nodded. "And projects them across minds. But it can't force others to act on them like a Komau."
"But you did."
"I guess I did. Though I am specially trained."
Yes.
Of course.
He should have taken that into account, too.
It was so strange.
He remembered him sounding so differently.
"Hm... Like this, right," the De-Toa mused. The voice coming from him did not match his weakened appearance at all: it seemed wide, almost warm, enveloping.
A sudden memory struck the Turaga.
The way the grey and black armor had looked, the way the words had been spoken to him, the stance. The eyes...
"When did you record that message?"
"I don't know. Don't remember."
"Was it so long ago?"
"No, no... I became a Toa so little... No. No, that's not it. It's been a while by now, hasn't it? I've gotten bad with time. Five years before the whole thing happened and we got here, I became a Toa. We knew we had to ensure you succeeded, but it wasn't an urgency. With a critter like that, the when isn't important."
He watched the Suletu tilt gently as a sulfur eye (the only healthy one) closed deep in thought.
"It's been in these past years... One of these, I don't know which one - I've gotten bad with time. But I went to the wrecks of Metru Nui, what little there was left of it, and I found the little thing, and I searched through it until I found you and told you the message."
"And you spoke with that voice."
"I did."
"And told me what you had to."
"I did."
"It was something planned, wasn't it?"
"Agreed upon, memorized, yes."
Vakama looked at him: "So it was fake," he said. "It was all fake."
"It was scripted. Not fake."
"What's the difference?"
Krakua raised his functioning eyelid only a little, to match the broken one, and stared right through him.
"You have a very visual mind," he repeated. "And when I found you, you... You were so small," (his voice shrank, became tiny, so tiny, so thin, so defenseless as his torso tilted terribly down upon his legs, whole body crumpling as if to disappear, arms reaching for his chest as if his heartlight hurt so terribly, impossibly much) "And so scared, and I was so large and frightening and dark, standing above you to rain judgement..."
He remembered that. That feeling, that sensation, that desperate need to hide, to explain himself, to beg forgiveness for his poor perfomance and stupid actions, for each and every failure.
Krakua stared at him.
"You didn't need me," he said in his horrible scratched voice. "You didn't need a soulless battered rookie in the worst period of his life. You needed a warm hand. Someone who could pull you into their palm larger than anything else and tell you without words, you can make it out of here. You can find a way out of here."
The morphed sound, the sound that for centuries he had associated with Toa Krakua, curled around the Turaga with the kindness of a worn, well-loved blanket.
He wondered who that might have been. To whom the palm that had dragged him out of the illusion might have belonged.
A rain of names and colors trickled into his mind like drizzle, most completely unknown, all accompanied by words he couldn't hope to understand which translated to a swirl of noises, each composing a dissected piece behind that voice that unfurled like an artificial flower picked apart. He recognized only one of those fragments.
It puzzled him.
The Toa of Sonics wheezed a couple cackles, still curled up on himself: "I was the third smallest," he grinned, "They used to pick me up like a frog and carry me around so I wouldn't wander off... I was too quiet. They would've lost me."
"And what about Kongu?"
"He's got large enough hands. He could do it."
"But he hasn't."
"No. He'd explode."
He laughed again.
There was nothing of Toa Krakua in the being before him, not a trace: Zaria had fixed the damage that had made his armor so strange and ancient, he had fixed the half melted shape that had made his Suletu so hard to recognize; his voice had been stitched together from countless others, his mannerisms had been taught.
The actual Krakua resembled that vision only in color, only in a certain light in the sulfur eyes. He had a strange manner of moving, careful, slow, as if lost in thought and yet observant, perfectly aware of everything around him; he pulled himself upright again with a creaking tardiness, humming under his breath, smiling wide in an enigmatic sort of way.
A realization bloomed in Vakama: he had never heard his real voice.
Only a fake, and his scratched new one.
It was such a strange fact.
They'd never truly known each other, he supposed.
"No, we never did," Krakua convened softly. "Such a shame."
He leaned forward without a sound, grabbing the Turaga's nape and pressing the cheek of his fixed mask to the orange Huna's. A weirdly pleasant feeling filled the mask maker and persisted even when the other pulled away.
"You seemed nice."
Vakama watched the De-Toa leave with a wave and a distant half-laughed request not to tell Jaller; he stood, blinking in the light of the flames, not quite sure what to think.
#bionicle#vakama#krakua#random writing#krakua voice i love being weird and off putting :) everybody tells me to stop tho. wonder why#idk if it coherent or good or anything it doesnt matter anyway
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The Face You Always Knew
An interpretation of what the Goddess of Time from Legend of Zelda could look like
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me:
brain: Jaller follows through with his mask's power (shielding) when he defends Takua with his body in order to let him then become Takanuva, and in a sense manages to protect and ensure the survival of his friends through his mask of Fate - which we see actively i.e. when saving Hahli from falling into the chasm, as well as passively through the survival of all the Inika and Nuva. His mask of Sonar is however a preventative measure instead of a protective one and has a fairly large range, which translates in his attempt to protect Matoro and the known universe by obliterating all obstacles in his way via nova blast. You can see a somewhat similar pattern in Takua and Matoro as well: the Pakari represents fortitude of character and perseverance, both of which begin to wane with doubt once Takua begins his journey, culminating in the replacement with the mask of Light; meanwhile, ignoring the massive death flags that are his later masks, Matoro's Akaku hints at his greater awareness of history, since his role as Nuju's aide allowed him to see through the Turaga's tales and learn the truth much sooner than his fellow Matoran.
me:
brain: isnt that fucked up
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Kēhua
A gift piece for @annasofthe11thdimension and their hauntingly beautiful AU. Experimented a lot with this one and i adore how it turned out!
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(Toa Vakama voice) god i hate being unsure and lost and left to my own devices. They should make a guy whose whole job is to guide toa efficiently so that nobody ever has to feel like i do right now
(long-suffering Turaga Vakama voice) so that guy turned out to be me—
wonder if Roodaka managed to string Vakama along because, amongst other things (hordika brain fog, variegated promises, feminine wiles and whatnot), she posed herself as a mentor to him
Vakama has had like three mentor-like figures before her between Nuhriii, Lhikan and Norik, and the only one that at this moment in time he could have considered successful was Nuhrii on account of the fact that he was the one to teach him mask making and was eventually bested by him, though that drove him to jealousy; Lhikan was a very distant figure mostly for no fault of his own, had no real time to teach him anything, and by the time he's hordika Vakama has grown to resent the fact that he turned him into a Toa apparently ruining his life; Norik tries to offer him comfort and guidance by nudging him into the right direction, but by this point Vakama feels so lost and disoriented and useless that he feels those nudges like jabs and refuses to cooperate
Roodaka instead railroads him sort of like he was a matoran again. she gives him tasks and a certain etiquette to follow and leads him to what she claims is greatness through a series of steps that assure him he doesnt have to think about any of it, that someone else has it under control for him. and he falls for it hook line and sinker because hes just so tired of fucking up and finally someone is telling him as clearly as possible how to succeed for once in his stupid life and he cant let go of the possibility that finally hell achieve something
#unfortunately he cares so so badly about everything all the time and especially other people. his duty is for life and life is unending#bionicle
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