#and not “hey i think the fact that this type of representation is all we get is sending a bad message about who we are”

[fates-theysband]

im genuinely scared to look in the notes of that "gay rep on big tv shows" post because i think it will be full of people being like "and what's wrong with chubby middle-aged fatherly gay men and young feminine lesbians huh?" well in real life nothing but when that's the sole gay representation in media there's a lot wrong with it

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

Daily fish fact #4 062 993

General fish fact!

Fish have gills maybe. Sometimes, I think? Uhh....

#fish #fishfact #fish facts #marine biology #biology #zoology #general fish fact

( 1 note )

🧊 grønland-citizen follow

Only 100 years old... he shouldve been at the blub :(

( 40 notes )

🖤 pandawhale follow

Liveblogging my migration! ;)

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming

🖤 pandawhale follow

Found a fish! Ate it >:)

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming!!!

🖤 pandawhale follow

My sister and I bullied this humpback for a lil before our ma told us to stop. What a party pooper..

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming and balancing a fish on my head B)

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming

🖤 pandawhale follow

Sorry forgot to update. Swimming!

🖤 pandawhale follow

Swimming..... still swimming....

🖤 pandawhale follow

Cod why did I think this was a good idea we're just swimming a dozen million miles and that's it

🎣 murican-shad follow

So, um... what was that about the fish?

( 153 notes )

💤 manatee-ing-just-fine follow

"Hey, did you hear about the recent-"

No, I didn't. I'm literally so unbothered by fishcourse I couldn't care less. I'm just goin with the flow. Riding the waves. Chilling. Moisturised and in my lane. Do you think the moss on my back signifies anything other than my peaceful adn pacifist nature. I'm just a Guy

( 588 notes )

🐟 migrating-gal follow

OOOHHHH MY COD YOU FRYS!!! You have no idea holy carp holy carp theres this one atlantic salmon migrating at the same time as me,,,, says we're going to the same river,,, her sides are such a gorgeous rich chestnut colour and shes so large compared to me and her belly accentuates her curves and shape in the best way! Her scales are so shiny too? Shes practically glowing!!! UGH every time we swim next to each other i wish there was a small creek so that she'd be forced to swim over me and crush me with her whole body weight

🧦 s0ckk-eye follow

Horny on main again?

🐟 migrating-gal follow

Oh, when I post about MY crushes its suddenly soo strange and unusual? Sure mr. "where can i find a salmon who will bite me right". sure. It's literally the season!

🧦 s0ckk-eye follow

You cannot prove I said that.

#/hj #hush hush #lets just pretend neither of us said anything thanks ;))

( 22 notes )

🐡 puffering follow

Felt bored. Doodled this.

( 9,432 notes )

🐠 damselfish-in-distress follow

Ngl I really hate how barren fish representation actually is :( There's two types of fish ever. Fish and shark and sometimes ray. They always show generic fishes only, like nonspecific fishes with one or two primary colours plastered on the side. Where are the pipefishes? The anemonefishes? The anglerfishes? The damselfishes? The morays? The hogfishes? The groupers? The marlins, the tunas? Even the wrasses???? There are never any specific species, just red fish, blue fish, that's it!

🌠 stargazing-in-antarctica follow

I would also like to bring up unflattering fishes. It's always reef fishes that get their spotlight to shine, but I've never even seen another stargazer portrayed in a good light on TV

🐠 damselfish-in-distress follow

!!!! This is so true! There's so many of us who never get our chance to be seen anywhere and it makes me so sad :( No diversity at all in the casts of recent underwater movies.

🦈 zzz-in-pyjamas-zzz follow

even the representation that does exist for specific fishes sucks. sharks like myself never see ourselves be shown as anything other than bloodthirsty killers :( we get generalised into a single stereotype of a big gray murderbeast

🔲 among-the-sea-weeds-deactivated follow

Anemonefishes are underrepresented?? umm okay. so we're just gonna pretend like a clownfish didn't star in the single biggest fish movie of all time? Where the sharks are portrayed as nice people mind you so why are you even whining. okay. sure. cool. Really need more clownfish movies out there!!!!

🪸 acidicanemone follow

No need to be passive aggressive @among-the-seaweeds-deactivated. You say anemonefishes are oversaturated in the media? In that case, point me to the seemingly abundant movies where two-band anemonefishes are the main character? How about the ones with only Mauritian and orange-fin anemonefish leads? Red saddlebacks, tomato anemonefish, orange anemonefish, skunk anemonefish, wide-band anemonefish, I could go on. Just because one species of anemonefish, the clown anemonefish, starred in one movie doesn't mean that the rest have it super nice and cozy.

Finding Nemo wasn't even too good for clown anemonefishes either. It's the only movie many have seen that even features a clownfish in a speaking role. My anemonefish roommate has often had people calling her Nemo or asking her to tell a joke because it's a "funny gag" from the movie. It's the first thing people tell her when they meet her a lot of the time. Trust me, the only person who has a problem with better fish species representation is you.

🐬 the-spinnerrrrrr follow

Did

Did you also miss the part where the shark goes on a massive murder rampage over two (2) tiny fishes because he smelled A Blood

🐠 damselfish-in-distress follow

This person had a ton of anti-dolphin posts on their account too, why am I not surprised 😭😭😭 We need to pull each other up, not put a whole subfamily down for cod's sake. Anemonefishes are called "Nemofish" to this day and age still

🦑 strawberry-squid follow

"We need to pull each other up, not put a whole subfamily down."

Beautifully said.

#deep sea talks #long post #fishcourse

( 644,214 notes )

🐚 gob-y-lin-cave follow

Just moved into my new place! It's this wonderful sandy crevice with a beautiful view of the kelp and a good nice rocky back wall for support. Hope the neighbours are nice and don't throw their sand into my hole like at my last neighbourhood

😎 the-goby-living-next-to-your-cave follow

hey

🐚 gob-y-lin-cave follow

what the fuck

( 1,201 notes )

🌟 bioluminescent-girlboss follow

can someone please come hang out with me in the deep sea? :( it's so boring here...

🦐 shrimpy-wimpy follow

I can! :)

🌟 bioluminescent-girlboss follow

wonderful! Come Closer please. to the Light.

🌑 tunicate-tunes-527 follow

RIP @shrimpy-wimpy it's been more than 3 hours 💀💀💀💀

🦐 shrimpy-wimpy follow

hopital

🌑 tunicate-tunes-527 follow

SHE LIVED!!!????????

#WHAT THE FUUUUUUUU

( 362 notes )

🐉 autistic-rhinomuraena follow

Pictures of my transition journey :}

🪶 pelicans-we follow

Oh look at you !!!!! You look so much happier and more comfortable in your latest picture! So happy for you!!

🌔 look-to-the-moon-wrasse follow

I can't wait to go through my transition myself :]c

#only i'll vbe transitioning in the opposite direction haha #*be

( 4,009 notes )

🐢 xxleatherbackxx follow

New drawing of a terramaid!! 👩👩🐟🐟

🐙 magnapining follow

Okay but imagine if terramaids we're actually real. To live on land there scales would probably be all dry and rough-textured! Brushing against them would immediately ruin your slimecooat, probably

☀️ molamolamolamolamola follow

Ah, thanks. I hate it.

🐳 left-whale follow

Since they're half human and humans have hair, what if they had

THESE!???

☀️ molamolamolamolamola follow

NOOOOO DON'T RUIN TERRAMAIDS LIKE THIS FOR ME ⚰️⚰️⚰️⚰️⚰️⚰️⚰️

🐋 big-blue-offishial follow

There's more. With a human lower half, they most likely give birth to live young as well. And with mammalian reproduction habits comes the, well....

☀️ molamolamolamolamola follow

STOP THIS SHADNESS THIS INSTANT

🌊 pull-the-triggerfish follow

Since they have a human lower half with a human digestive system that means they have a human diet too, right?

☀️ molamolamolamolamola follow

why

🐋 big-blue-offishial follow

Too much time in our flippers, dear.

Oh, and a need to make everything cursed. Of course.

🐢 xxleatherbackxx follow

Please stop reblogging this 😭😭😭 I just wanted to show off my art

#not my art #im so tired i keep getting notifs for this post #let me rest

( 428,497 notes )

🐌 hadal-snailfish follow

*moves one inch*

[whataperfectwasteoftime]

Spilled Ink

Pairing: Tattoo Artist Marcus Pike x f!reader

Word Count: 7.5k

Summary: Uhhh Marcus Pike as the world's softest tattoo artist that's it that's the fic.

Warnings: Lots of tattoo talk, obviously, which includes needles, tattoo guns, pain, mention of bleeding, etc.; reader is explicitly coded as neurodivergent because I said so; yearning; lots of kissing; Marcus Pike being a goddamn menace and he fucking knows it

A/N: @kedsandtubesocks made a post about Tattoo Artist Marcus Pike (original post HERE) and then I wrote 7.5k words in 12 hours, as one does. All credit for the idea goes to the amazing Erika who entrusted me with this idea and THANK GOD SHE DID because I don't think I could have gotten it out of my stupid brain otherwise. Header pics credit go to Erin @perotovar, who made these with Tattoo Artist Marcus Pike in mind and I'm just WOOFWOOFBARKBARKBARKBARKHOWL. Thanks also to @littlebirdsbookshelf who suffers through HOURS of me sending screenshots every time I write anything. Love you <3

Additional Note on Canon: I am pretending that we never got to see Marcus Pike in short sleeves in the show despite it happening twice. He has full sleeves on both his arms in this fic that he covered up during his time working at the FBI. Because sleeves are hot and I said so.

Masterlist

It’s not unusual, these days, to wander down the sidewalk staring at your phone. Some people are texting. Some people are reading the news–because hey, this is D.C. Others, like you on this brisk morning, are watching the little blue dot on a tiny representation of the city streets, trying to find the address you had typed into the search bar.

A text box pops up, informing you of your arrival, and you finally look up.

No wonder it took you so long to find the place–it’s hardly what you expected at all. You always picture tacky neon signs, bars on the windows, undesirables milling about on the street, smoking cigarettes.

Okay, so you admittedly don’t actually know much about tattoos.

All you know is that you want one–a fact you confessed to a friend over lunch the other week: a conversation that led you here.

“Okay, so get one,” she had said bluntly.

“It’s not all that simple,” you had protested. 

“Why?”

“It’s just… it seems like a lot. Mentally. Physically. I’m not sure I have what it takes.”

“They don’t hurt that bad,” your friend had insisted.

“I’m not just talking about that, I’m talking about… y’know, just everything. The noise. New people. Strangers touching me. It just doesn’t seem like something I’ll be able to do.”

“Oh. Ohhh. Because of the… yep. Actually I might have something for you,” she said, taking out her phone and scrolling through that app that drives you crazy–it’s overstimulation in a convenient package–full of noise, chaos, and flashing lights. 

She must have seen you pull a face, because she held out her hand placatingly. 

“Just finding the name of the place, hang on. It’s a shop right here in DC that went ‘viral’ for this video of a guy with autism who wanted a tattoo to commemorate his dad, but he was only comfortable lying on the floor–so the tattoo artist just… got on the floor with him! It was really cute, and anyway I guess he caters to all sorts of people, so… I dunno. Check it out.”

And here you are. Checking it out.

The words “Government-Issued Ink” are spelled out on large windows, and the punny name–apt for its location not far from the Capitol–makes you snort. 

The shop is bright, warm, and inviting–tearing down your outdated preconceptions that tattoo places must always be run-down, dark, and dingy. It’s also empty this early in the morning, save for a lone figure in the back, seated at a well-worn desk, his head pitched forward over his work.

He’s so enveloped in whatever he’s sketching that he must not have heard the light ringing of the bell as you had entered. You watch him for a few moments–taking in the graceful movements of his hand and the way his fingers grasp the pen. He’s dressed in a plain blue button-down dress shirt, which also doesn’t fit your assumed archetype of ‘Tattoo Artist.’ You can’t see his face; his head is leaning forward too much and a few short locks of dark brown hair obscure your view.

Suddenly wondering if you’re being incredibly rude, staring at someone without announcing your presence, you open your mouth to introduce yourself.

“Um.”

While not exactly eloquent, it serves its purpose. The man startles and looks up in surprise.

“I’m so sorry,” he says, jumping to his feet and letting the pen clatter carelessly to the desk. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“That’s okay,” you shake your head rapidly. “I was, um…” You blink a few times, your nerves getting the better of you as the man comes around his desk to approach the front of the store.

“Interested in a walk-in consultation?” he offers, holding out his hands in a gesture that could either be an open invitation or a shrug.

“I don’t know,” you confess quietly. “I was thinking about getting, uh, a tattoo, and I was told this shop was… good. With tattoos. And other stuff.”

“Other stuff?” he chuckles, smiling warmly. 

“You know… with people who… might not be good at getting tattoos.”

“What makes you think you aren’t ‘good at getting tattoos?’”

“A hunch,” you shrug, expelling a little huff of laughter through your nose. “I was told to ask for a Marcus Pike?”

The man’s smile widens. “You’re looking at him.”

Oh. You aren’t sure what you expected, but it wasn’t this. Marcus Pike is well-dressed and clean-cut, almost startlingly so. You scan up and down, looking for any sign that this man could possibly be a tattoo artist, but the only evidence you can find is a small black target inked between his thumb and forefinger on his right hand. Don’t… tattoo artists usually have more ink? Of course, with him almost completely covered from head to toe, you obviously can’t create a full picture of Marcus’s skin, but the fact that he wouldn’t look out of place in one of the nearby government buildings still takes you by surprise.

You realize you haven’t said anything in response, but Marcus doesn’t seem to be bothered by your deer-in-headlights stare. Instead, he grins again and steps sideways, extending his arm in a silent invitation to come deeper into the shop.

“Come on in. If you’d like, go ahead and sit wherever you want, and we can talk about it. No pressure,” he promises. “I’m not here to push ink on you like a used car salesman; I’m here to collaborate with you. Figure out what you really want. And, if what you want ends up being ‘nothing,’ I totally support that, too.”

There’s something innate and intrinsic about Marcus Pike that sets you completely at-ease. You cast your eyes around, taking in the eclectic seating in the shop–all mismatched, all different colors, styles, and shapes, but all looking incredibly comfortable and inviting. You settle on a giant turquoise beanbag that seems to swallow you whole when you sink down into it, and Marcus grins and sits down in the bright yellow saucer chair beside it. 

“So at the very least, you’re thinking about a tattoo,” Marcus leads. “Can you tell me about that?”

You nod, feeling encouraged by his openness. “Yeah, so… my mom, she passed away a couple of years ago, and it just seemed like I should… memorialize her in some way. Like, in a way that leaves its mark on me like she left a mark on me, and I just couldn’t stop thinking about the idea of getting some kind of permanent art that commemorates her.”

“That’s a great idea,” Marcus says softly. “Lots of people choose to do that after losing a loved one.”

“Yeah, the only problem is that I’m not good with um… noise, or people touching me, or… pain, really,” you confess. “I’m like, the worst candidate for getting a tattoo that exists.”

Marcus chuckles softly and shakes his head. “Personally, I don’t believe that. I think anyone can get a tattoo done if they want it, provided they get it done in a way that feels safe and comfortable.”

“My friend, she uh, recommended your shop because apparently you’ve done some stuff for people with autism and it went viral on TikTok…” you ramble, “and I thought maybe that meant you’d be a good fit for… for me.”

Understanding flickers in Marcus’s expression, and he nods, a small smile spreading across his face. “I hope so,” he says with quiet earnesty. 

A beat passes–just a few seconds of silence–but something small and soft and warm settles down between the two of you, and the comforting feeling sinks down into the pit of your stomach and stays there, latent and waiting.

“So, let’s talk design,” Marcus announces. “Do you have anything in mind? Any images or ideas, however vague? I can do anything from replicating designs to building something completely from scratch for you.”

“I like the idea of it being a unique piece,” you tell him.

“I prefer original designs too,” he says. “Not to sound incredibly cheesy, but there’s no one like you, you know? In–In the general sense, of course.” He chuckles sheepishly, looking down at his hands. “I like knowing each person that comes in here leaves with something unique. Something all their own—I’m rambling,” he says quickly, the tips of his ears turning slightly pink. “One thing about me is that I talk too much. Anyway–did you have any ideas you can share with me about what you’d like?”

“I don’t have a good image in my mind,” you confess anxiously. After all, how can he build a design based on the swirling, disjointed images in your brain? “I think I want it to be colorful, like she was. And… I keep getting thoughts about, I dunno, the cyclical nature of life, something corny like that.”

Marcus laughs. “Sometimes the corny stuff is what sticks with us. So, colorful and commenting on the cyclical nature of life,” he lists off on his fingers, still grinning. “Anything else?”

“I’ve looked through your galleries online,” you tell him. “You have a few that look like watercolor paintings, and I really love how they look.”

He nods thoughtfully. “I’m gonna throw out an idea—Feel free to tell me ‘no,’ because I’m just brainstorming here, but I keep thinking about a tree of life. The leaves could easily be done in watercolor and could be any combination of colors you want.” His right hand twitches–as if reaching for a phantom pen–as he speaks, and his gaze seems to be fixed on a spot on the wall, his eyes glimmering with enthusiasm as he starts to speak faster.

“You could have the leaves and the roots connecting on the sides, making a circle, maybe even having her birth date and death date embedded in the roots…” He blinks rapidly a few times, as if dispelling the image from his head. “Anyway. That’s a possibility.”

“I think that’s amazing,” you say softly, watching Marcus with something like amazement in your expression. “Actually… I really like that idea. It sounds… perfect.”

“Oh,” he intones softly, looking at you in surprise as a bright, toothy smile breaks across his face. “Oh. Well then, let’s do it, huh? One final question: where do you envision getting it?”

“I was thinking on my shoulder. Here,” you indicate, pressing your hand to the skin of your upper arm. “That way it’s visible when I want it to be, but easily hidden if for some reason it needs to be.”

“That’s perfect,” Marcus says. “Plus, the circular design will go really well there. Okay. Great. Um, some things to know about the process. We’ll exchange emails, and you can contact me at any time with any questions, concerns, ideas, changes, anything. In the meantime, I’ll get started on a design for you, and I’ll share initial sketches that you can give feedback on before I move to the final stages of the design. It’ll take a couple of weeks, maximum, depending on any changes you ask for. My only request is that you’re always honest with your feedback–don’t tell me you like something when you don’t. I promise, it won’t hurt my feelings.” He grins widely. “After that, you book an appointment on a day that works best for you. I almost always book the whole day for the appointment to factor in time for copious breaks and making sure you feel comfortable. Does that work for you?”

You nod eagerly.

“Last question,” Marcus says. “Is it okay if I get a close-up picture of your upper arm? That way I can make sure it fits the curvature of your arm, it’s the right size, stuff like that.”

“Mhmm,” you nod again, pressing your lips together and trying not to look nervous. Thank god you wore a sleeveless top under your sweater.

“Only if you’re comfortable,” he insists.

“No, no, it’s fine,” you say quickly, removing just the one arm from your outer layer and pulling it aside. 

You watch as Marcus grabs a little ‘point-and-shoot’ digital camera from his desk and comes back to your side.

“This is just used for design purposes,” he promises. “I delete them after the design is done.”

“I trust you.”

His resulting expression could light an entire room. “Thank you,” he answers quietly. “Okay. Super close-up, just your arm. Cool?”

“Cool,” you confirm, and you hear the camera click several times.

“Actually,” Marcus says, still staring thoughtfully at your bare shoulder. “Would it be okay if I made a couple of little marks–washable marker, of course–to make sure the dimensions are how you want them?”

Oh. You normally don’t like it when people touch you. You knew it was going to happen eventually, obviously, because how else was he going to get the design onto your skin? But it was something you had planned on working yourself up to, not something you had to do today. On the other hand, something about Marcus’s entire bearing makes you inexplicably ache to be touched by him. 

“‘No’ is an acceptable response,” he interrupts your dithering with a quiet reassurance.

And actually, that works to seal the deal for you, and your decision is made in an instant. 

“Yes. You can. That’s fine.” And, to your surprise, you mean it.

Marcus seems just as surprised at your answer–his eyebrows shoot upward almost comically at your response.

“Okay,” he says softly. “That’s perfect. Hang on.” He jumps up again to retrieve a black marker–from what was clearly a children’s set of washable markers. He meets your eyes, and again you take in that sincere, earnest, patient look that endeared you to this man from the moment you entered the little shop.

“Is it okay if I touch your arm?” he asks quietly, still watching you carefully as you nod.

“Tell me if that changes,” he murmurs, dropping his gaze to your shoulder again. His touch, when you feel it, is just as warm as you’d imagined. He’s gentle, cautious, and when he speaks again, his voice remains at that same, soft volume and tone. “I’m envisioning being from about here–” he makes a little black dot, “–to here. What do you think?” 

You nod. It’s the perfect size–large enough to cover your shoulder but stopping just above the point where the sleeve of a regular t-shirt would hit.

“That’s perfect.”

“Okay, so that’s–” he tsks softly, measuring the distance with his finger, “–about four inches, so that same distance across, and–” he makes two more marks on either side of your shoulder. “About like that. Is that okay?”

“Yes,” you answer, smiling with enthusiasm. 

“Great! Let me just…” Marcus draws a few short lines denoting the proposed boundary of your design, and you can’t help the soft giggle that escapes you at the cool tip of the marker on your skin. 

“Sorry,” he chuckles. “One more picture?”

At your nod, the camera clicks one last time. 

“Like I said, that’ll wash off with soap, no problem,” he promises with a smile. “Thanks for that, makes it easier to scale.” He grabs two business cards off his desk and hands them to you. “Can you write your email on this one for me? And you can keep the other one. Like I said, anything you need, just email me. And uh, barring that, you’ll be hearing from me in a week or so with a rough sketch. Okay?”

You scribble down your email and hand the card back to Marcus before pulling your sweater back over your bare arm. You slip the other card into your purse and rise to your feet. “Thanks,” you say, nodding to him.

“Hey, no–thank you,” Marcus returns. “Thanks for entrusting me with this. I mean it.”

Surprising yourself, you extend your hand toward him, and, when he takes it, you feel enveloped with warmth again.

“Thanks,” repeat, a little bit more breathlessly this time, before turning and hurrying out of the shop before you can embarrass yourself any further.

Your shoulder still tingles from his touch hours later.

Rather than it being a week before you hear from him, you receive an email from Marcus Pike just three days later.

Subject: Initial Sketch

Hello,

Please see attached. It’s just pencil for now, but I made a note of the general blocks of color I was thinking for the leaves. You’ll see what I mean when you open the file. Sorry, I know it’s a pretty rough sketch, I was just excited to get this to you. I look forward to your feedback!

Best regards,

Marcus :) 

Eagerly, you open the attachment. First of all, there’s nothing “rough” about the sketch other than the fact that it’s just penciled in. The details are already so intricate, and you find yourself smiling in amazement as you take in the design.

It’s beautiful.

Brackets, each labeled with a different color in Marcus’s neat, tidy handwriting, surround the top of the tree. Red. Orange. Yellow. Green. Blue. Violet. 

At the bottom of the image is another handwritten note: *All the colors will blend together and the result should look like a rainbow.

Tears spring, unbidden, to your eyes, as you feverishly type out your response.

Subject: Re: Initial Sketch

Marcus,

I really don’t know what to say other than it’s perfect. It’s absolutely perfect. Made me tear up. Look forward to seeing it in color.

Thanks again!

Not even five minutes go by before your phone vibrates with another email.

Subject: Re: Re: Initial Sketch

I’m sorry if I made you cry! Obviously wasn’t my intention but I’m glad the design evokes emotion :) I’ll move forward with the design as-is and you should hear from me soon with a full-color image.

Marcus :) 

You can’t wait. The next week and a half stretches out excruciatingly, but finally, on a Wednesday evening, you receive another email. 

Subject: Final Design

Hey there!

Hope you’ve been doing well. Thought you might like to see the final design of your tattoo ;) See attached and let me know if anything needs to be changed. Be critical! Don’t hold anything back! Once we agree on a final piece, we’ll get you on the calendar.

Best regards,

Marcus :) 

Your mind skims over the fact that Marcus used a winking-face emoji in your email, because you honestly aren’t equipped to process that right now, and open the attachment instead. This time, you start crying in earnest. It’s perfect. The colors are so vibrant, and they make the tree look as though it’s in a constant state of movement. Your mom’s birth and death dates are entwined seamlessly into the roots themselves, in a way that makes them not readily apparent at first glance, but seeming to just appear out of nowhere upon further inspection. 

Subject: Re: Final Design

Marcus,

If I had any critical feedback, I would share it, I promise. But I have nothing. This is everything I’d imagined and more, and it means the world to me.

Thank you so much.

After a few more messages back and forth, you settle on a date one month out. 

You can’t wait.

As excited as you’ve been for the past month, when you step foot back into Marcus’s little tattoo parlor, the air of finality makes your body thrum with anxiety.

You’re really doing this.

Marcus is at the back of the shop, busying himself with setting up his workspace when you enter. Today, he’s wearing a dark green henley that looks just as soft as he is, and seems to complement his features even more. As soon as he hears the chimes, his head snaps up, and he grins widely. 

“Hey!” he calls out excitedly. “Just getting everything ready. Do you want something to drink before we get started? I’ve got water, juice, soda…” he trails off, waving his hand in the direction of a mini-fridge in the corner. 

“I’m okay for now.”

“Sounds good, but when we take a break, you should have some juice or something else with a bit of sugar in it, okay?” You nod, and he continues. “Okay! Where do you want to sit?”

“Don’t I have to sit in the chair over there?” you ask, gesturing to the traditional chair and bench near Marcus’s work table. 

“Not at all,” he protests. “The table is mobile, I bring it to wherever you feel comfortable.”

“Oh,” you say dumbly. “I’ll go ahead and sit in the chair, though.” Of all the options, it looks like the easiest–you aren’t entirely sure how Marcus would be able to comfortably tattoo you whilst sitting on a bean bag chair. 

“Your choice,” he insists, spreading his hands out in an open and unguarded stance.

You settle in the chair and he sits down on a rolling stool beside you. 

“Okay, so I’ve got a stencil of your design here,” Marcus says, holding up a paper with an outline of the tree for you to see. “It’ll transfer onto your skin exactly how you want it to go, and I’ll just trace it. Make sense?”

“Yep,” you nod.

“Before I do that, though, I have to make sure nothing interferes with the design, including tiny little hairs.” He holds up a pink safety razor. “Are you comfortable with me doing this for you?”

At your tentative nod of consent, Marcus leans forward and gently swipes the razor up and down your shoulder until he’s satisfied. His eyes dart between your skin and your face the entire time–making sure you’re still with him. After he’s done, he talks you through the stencil–confirming its location, gently applying it to your shoulder, and then holding up a mirror for you to approve. 

“It’s great,” you whisper excitedly.

Marcus returns your smile and begins to absentmindedly roll up his sleeves in preparation to start working–-and the question about tattoos that you’d asked yourself upon first seeing the man is suddenly and unexpectedly answered.

You can’t help the soft sound of surprise that escapes from you when you catch the colorful patchwork of designs on both of his forearms, disappearing under the pushed-up henley and suggesting that they go all the way up. 

Marcus catches you staring and grins, his eyes sparkling with mirth.

“I didn’t know,” you say softly. “You keep them covered up.”

“Force of habit,” Marcus shrugs. “I had a desk job for a long time.”

“Doing what?” you ask, curiously. You can’t see the man doing anything but this.

“If I told you, I’d have to kill you,” he jokes, winking in your direction. 

Ignoring how the wink makes your heart stutter in your chest, you bark out a laugh at his answer. “What? Were you like a secret agent or something?” you tease.

“Special Agent,” he corrects, grinning. 

“Get out,” you deadpan. “I can’t imagine you as a Fed.”

Marcus shrugs, giving you another one of his boyish, crooked smiles. “Would’ve been fifteen years this year had I not finally seen the writing on the wall and run for the hills a couple of years ago.”

“What made you leave?” 

He laughs softly, shaking his head. “That’s a long story. How sensitive are you to noise?” he asks, abruptly changing the subject.

“Uh, I dunno. Kind of depends on the day and the situation,” you shrug.

“Fair. Well, I usually let newcomers listen to what the gun actually sounds like, so there are no surprises. If it’s too loud, I do have noise canceling headphones.”

And miss out on hearing Marcus’s soft-spoken reassurances? No matter how loud the tattoo gun is, you’d rather endure it just to be able to hear him talk. 

Marcus turns the instrument on, and the room is filled with a mild buzzing sound. On your worst days, admittedly, it would probably grate upon your nerves, but you’re feeling relaxed, comfortable, and excited about your new tattoo.

“It’s not bad,” you tell him truthfully. 

“Perfect,” he grins. “Are you all set to get started?”

Heart rate increasing with pleasant anticipation, you nod giddily. 

“I’m obviously gonna be touching your arm a lot,” Marcus says, “so let me know if you need a break from that, the noise, the needle, anything.” Seeing your solemn nod, he continues. “I’m gonna do a little dot right here to let you see how it feels, okay?” He gently touches his index finger to your skin to indicate where. 

“Okay.”

The gun turns on again, and Marcus presses it lightly against your skin for just a second before pulling back.

“...That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

“I thought it would hurt more,” you confess.

Marcus laughs. “Well, the same feeling over and over again in a small area can start to be pretty uncomfortable. I’ll check in regularly to make sure you’re still doing fine. Good?”

You smile widely. “I’m really excited.”

His smile softens, his gaze becoming warmer and more tender. “I’m glad.”

His other hand gently cradles your arm as Marcus leans in, a look of intense concentration settling over his features as he begins the design. Engrossed in his work, you take the time to study his forearms. They’re a hodgepodge of designs, clearly done at different times and by different artists, but you can see themes throughout. He likes classic styles, you can tell, and in between some of the more traditional works you can see beautiful references to an assortment of famous paintings. A Dali melting clock here. A sunflower clearly inspired by Van Gogh there. On his opposite bicep, you can just barely make out the side of one design that looks like it might be of a Greek statue. Tilting your head, you realize it’s Nike alighting on the bow of a warship, and you inhale sharply. That’s one of your favorite sculptures.

“Still okay?” Marcus asks, glancing up at you with concern in his eyes.

“Sorry.” You shake your head quickly. 

“Just checking,” he says softly. “Try to be just a little more still, okay?”

“Sorry,” you repeat, laughing sheepishly. 

“Don’t be, you’re doing great.”

You try to fight the way your entire body seems to grow warm at Marcus’s praise, but you can’t stop the way the feeling stampedes through you. You’re being ridiculous, you chastise yourself. He’s doing his job, and you’re getting all moony-eyed.

In order to distract yourself, you continue playing ‘Spot the Famous Artwork’ on Marcus’s sleeves–although, as distractions go, it’s not your best work. You can’t help but focus in on the way his forearm cords with muscle as he holds the tattoo gun, controlling each movement so delicately and precisely, creating a beautiful, intricate design on your shoulder.

After finding a bit of yellow patchwork that's clearly a reference to Gustav Klimt's The Kiss near his right elbow, you break your silence.

“You like art, huh?”

It seems like a stupid thing to say to a fucking tattoo artist of all people, and you immediately kick yourself internally for saying something so obvious. 

Marcus glances up, and, seeing how your eyes are focused on his own ink, smiles. “Always have,” he murmurs, returning his gaze to your shoulder. “Some of those are years-old.”

“Is that how you got into being a tattoo artist?” you ask.

“Sort of,” he answers, brow pinched in concentration as he continues working. “I uh, apprenticed for a shop in college to pay the bills before going to Quantico for training.”

“You’re really talented,” you tell him. “I was surprised to find out you haven’t been doing this your whole life.”

Marcus hums his appreciation as he carefully fills in a root. 

“Can I ask what made you join the FBI instead of opening your own place after college?”

He huffs a little laugh through his nose. “Parents would have killed me, going to college and then doing nothing with it.”

“Running a small business isn’t exactly doing nothing,” you point out.

“Well, public opinion on tattoos wasn’t what it is now,” Marcus says. “They were scandalized by my apprenticeship, but it paid the bills, so they couldn’t complain too loudly.”

“Was it them who wanted you to join the FBI?”

“Mm, not so much,” he murmurs. “It was more like ‘whatever you want to do, so long as you can make a lucrative career out of it.’ Being an artist wasn’t one of those things, so in lieu of becoming one myself, I decided I wanted to protect them instead.”

You scrunch up your nose. “Protect them how?”

Marcus grins up at you and waggles his eyebrows playfully. “Art crimes,” he answers. “Being an art detective was kind of in the limelight in the early ‘nineties after the famous Gardner Museum theft, and I got swept up in the craze.”

“So you spent the last fifteen-ish years recovering stolen art,” you fill in for him.

“Stolen, forged, looted, illegally traded or smuggled…” Marcus offers, not breaking his concentration again. He wasn’t wrong–the repeated drag of the needle across what felt like the same square centimeter of your skin was starting to wear on you. 

“Uh-huh,” you say, forcing the discomfort out of your tone.

Noticing the tightness in your voice immediately, Marcus’s movements stop. “Feeling okay?”

You shrug.

The gun switches off.

“You gotta be honest about how you’re feeling,” he reminds you. “I might be able to create designs based off of customers’ vague descriptions, but that doesn’t make me a mind-reader.”

“It’s a little uncomfortable, but I can endure it,” you insist.

“There’s no need to endure something that’s painful,” Marcus argues with an amused smile. “Even if it involves choosing to repeatedly jamming a needle into your skin.”

You can’t help but laugh, and your heart swells when he joins you.

“C’mere,” he says. “Let me show you something.”

You let him lead you to the other side of the shop, where he stops in front of a large storage cabinet that you'd assumed held various supplies. When he opens it, however, you find that isn’t the case at all.

No, the entire cabinet is filled to the brim with a collection of stuffed animals just as eclectic and varied as the furniture. There's also a couple of shoeboxes filled with every manner of fidget toy you could ever imagine. 

"You can grab one, if you want. I know it might feel kind of goofy, but I promise they help with the pain."

"Okay," you breathe. Your gaze lingers first on the IKEA shark, then on a very soft-looking cactus with an adorable grumpy expression, but when your gaze lands on the largest and arguably oddest toy in the collection, your hands can't help but move toward it. 

"The big guy, huh?" Marcus laughs, taking the giant squid off of the shelf and placing it in your arms. You have to laugh at how large and ungainly it is; its massive black eyes stare vacantly back at you, but the effect is dopey, rather than menacing. 

"Where do you get all of these?" you ask in amazement. 

"Most of them are gifts from past clients, including that one," Marcus says, indicating the squid. "But I think he originally came from the Smithsonian. I was told his name is 'Cthulhu, Lord of the Deep.'"

"Thank you," you say in a small, appreciative voice.

"'S'fine," Marcus shrugs. "Feel up to continuing?"

You nod, looking down at your partially-inked shoulder. "Guess you didn't get very far before I had to stop," you remark, somewhat self-deprecatingly. 

"It's not a race," your artist says earnestly. "We've got the whole day, and we go at your pace. You're paying me, after all." Another wink in your direction.

"Yeah," you nod, confidence growing again. "Yeah, okay." You plop down in your seat, with Cthulhu in your lap, and Marcus takes his place beside you. 

“Gonna turn this back on again,” he announces as the now-familiar buzz fills the room, “and I’m gonna touch your arm–” his fingers wrap warmly and gently around your skin, “–annnd here we go.” 

The needle scratches insistently against your skin, but it isn’t so bad–not really, not with the hilarious giant squid on your lap and Marcus’s gentle, soothing voice in your ear. He talks while he works, sometimes asking you questions about your own life–to which he listens intently and always seems to have follow-up questions–and sometimes telling you stories of his own. You discuss art, obviously, but also music, books, movies, and baseball of all things.

You find yourself wondering if he has this type of easy rapport with everyone who comes in, but you assume he must. He might be the most disarming person you’ve ever met, and it’s hardly a stretch to believe he’s like this with everyone. Still, there’s an ugly, jealous part of you that wishes the connection between you was unique, special. That he’s only this warm with you. 

Marcus was right–squeezing the stuffed toy on your lap is a perfect distraction from the discomfort of the needle, and before long, the sensation fades into the background. As the time drags on, though, the persistent drone of the tattoo gun causes an ache to creep in and settle between your eyes. You take in a deep breath through your nose, count to three, and exhale slowly through your mouth.

Marcus glances up, watching you for a split-second before cutting power to the gun and stretching his back with a satisfied sigh. 

“Break time,” he announces. “Hand’s getting a bit sore.” He shoots you a knowing glance and another one of those crooked smiles. “And you should probably have a little something to drink, maybe a snack.”

“Yeah, thanks,” you say gratefully as he walks over to the little fridge.

“Apple juice?” he asks, holding up a little juice box that looks slightly comical in his large hands. When you nod enthusiastically, he hands it to you.

His fingers brush yours.

If it were anyone else, you’d recoil, but it’s him. It might just be the forced proximity, but…

You’re developing quite the crush on Marcus Pike.

Shoving the thought aside for the moment, you stab the straw into the little hole and take a long sip. Marcus settles down beside you with his own choice–a little can of vegetable juice–and holds it up in a silent ‘cheers.’

Feeling emboldened, you ask the question that’s been burning in your mind since you started.

“So what made you leave the whole ‘helping other artists’ thing behind and start a tattoo business instead?”

Marcus presses his lips together, and for a moment, you fear you’ve crossed a boundary. Just before you’re about to apologize profusely, though, he speaks.

“Have you ever just… woken up one morning, and realized that everything you were working toward, everything you thought you wanted in life… was a lie?”

“I… I don’t know,” you confess quietly, surprised at the emotion behind his words.

“Happened to me,” he laughs softly. “I had moved to DC for what I thought was my dream job, with who I thought was–” he shakes his head, as though dispelling an unpleasant thought. “I had spent my entire life checking boxes: College degree? Check. Well-paying job? Check. House? Check. Check, check check. I spent so much time trying to get ahead, like life was some kind of game to be won. If I said all the right things, did all the right things, if I did everything right… I’d have the life I wanted.”

“What was the life you wanted?” you ask, voice barely above a whisper.

“It was bullshit, is what it was. Saw one too many rom-coms as a kid, I suppose. I thought I was after the picket fence, the dog, the wife and two-point-five kids, that sort of thing. And one morning I woke up, realized that… that relentless pursuit of something I couldn’t even hold–it was all bullshit.”

“So you just… quit?”

“I quit. I wanted to create things again. I wanted to feel inspired. After a bit of uh… frantic soul-searching before I ran out of money entirely, I sold my stupid, too-big condo that I hated and bought this shop instead.”

“Did it work?”

“Well, I’m not bankrupt yet,” Marcus says dryly.

“No, I mean… did you feel inspired again?”

“I did. I do. So very much so,” he says, his voice soft and gentle. His eyes flick up to meet yours, and that comfortable warmth that had settled in between you the first time you had met him… grows. Mutates. Until the warm, tingling feeling feels a lot more like electricity.

An unspoken moment seems to pass through you, but then Marcus clears his throat roughly, setting the empty can aside and standing again, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Wanna keep going?”

Breathlessly, you nod. 

In no time at all, you’re settled back in the chair with one of Marcus’s warm, strong, large hands cradling your arm as the other gently wields the tattoo gun. As he starts to fill in and blend the colors, the pain starts to increase, and you worry one of the fuzzy tentacles back and forth in your hand as you grit your teeth.

“I know, I know,” Marcus soothes quietly. “The color’s the worst part, but you’re being so good for me.”

It helps you to watch him work, so you do. He’s blending in the colors now, and you watch with interest as it starts to take shape. It’s so mesmerizing that you hardly even notice the buzz of the gun or the light sting of the needle anymore.

“And you said you ‘weren’t good at tattoos,’” he teases gently, noticing your obvious interest. 

“Did I say that?” you laugh, teasing back.

“I believe your words were, ‘I’m like the worst candidate for getting a tattoo that exists.’” he reminds you. “And look at you now, huh?”

You duck your head at his praise, unable to withstand the intensity and honesty in his gaze.

“Doing okay after all, I guess,” you say with a sheepish smile.

“You’re doing amazing,” Marcus corrects, smiling warmly. “The type of client any artist dreams of.”

You don’t know how to respond to the things this man says to you. Stunned and at a loss for words, you stare awkwardly at your hand where it still wraps around Cthulhu, Lord of the Deep.

“I’m sorry.” The words are soft, concerned. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just meant that your enthusiasm and your curiosity is the stuff that makes me want to be an artist in the first place.”

“Are you saying I inspire you?” you try to tease, but it falls flat.

Just audibly, over the hum of the tattoo gun, you hear his whispered response. 

“Yes.” 

As Marcus wipes away the last of the stray ink on the purple bit of tree, the tattoo gun suddenly switches off. The silence is almost shocking, and you blink rapidly in confusion.

“Break time?” you ask.

Marcus chuckles, the corners of his eyes crinkling with amusement. “It’s all done.”

“It is?” you ask, although you can see the answer for yourself in the large mirrored wall to your right. 

“How’s it feel?” he asks.

“My arm kind of aches,” you confess, “but oh my God, Marcus… it’s beautiful.”

It’s his turn to preen under your praise, the tips of his ears blushing pink as he grins back at you.

“I’m glad you like it,” he says softly. “Here, let me give you a little something for the pain.” 

He squeezes a glob of light-green cooling gel and coats the angry skin with the barest of touches. “Still okay?” he asks, glancing up at you for confirmation.

After the harshness of the needle, the soft press of his fingers is more soothing than ever, and you have to resist the urge to sigh and melt into his touch. 

“Yes,” you whisper.

“You’re going to want to keep this covered for a couple of hours, up to overnight,” Marcus says as he carefully applies a dressing to your shoulder–still softly, but more businesslike than before as he walks you through all of the instructions for care. “Once you take this off tomorrow, you’ll probably see some fluid leaking from it–that’s totally normal. It’s blood, plasma, and extra ink, and it should stop after a few days before it starts to scab over.

 “You’ll want to keep it from drying out; I’d recommend scent-free, dye-free lotion if you don’t already have some,” he continues. “Wash it twice a day and put lotion on after. When it starts to scab, I can’t stress this enough: don’t pick the scabs.” He gives you a serious look. “Repeat that back to me.”

“Don’t pick the scabs.”

“If you do, you could cause it to scar, or even pull out the ink. One more time for me,” he prompts, and you get the feeling that this is always the sticking point in his speech.

“Don’t pick the scabs,” you repeat.

“It’ll take three to four months for the lower layers of skin to completely heal,” Marcus tells you. “During that time, keep it out of the sun, keep it hydrated, and you’re in the clear.”

“And don’t pick the scabs,” you say teasingly. 

Marcus winks at you. “Exactly. Any other questions for me?”

“No, just… thank you. It’s amazing,” you tell him. “You did such an incredible job.”

“Hard not to, when I have such a beautiful canvas.”

Your eyes dart up, expecting to see a teasing glint in his eyes, but all you can see is heartfelt sincerity. You swallow thickly, and he tracks the movement, his eyes dropping down, then back up to meet your eyes. Is it… not just you? Does he feel it, too? Realization slams through you and threatens to overload all of your systems. Marcus’s lips are parted slightly, and the look in his eyes… it’s desire.

“Marcus…”

“Wait,” he says urgently. “Hang on. Come… come over here for a minute, let me–” he dashes awkwardly over to the till on the counter and gives you your total. Frowning in confusion–he wants to do this now? Interrupting that electric moment that had passed between you?–you dutifully swipe your card and numbly take the receipt.

“Now you’re no longer my client,” Marcus explains softly. “I–sorry–I was about to throw caution to the wind and kiss you, and I didn’t… I didn’t want to be unethical, I–”

“Yes,” you say simply, giving your response to his un-asked question.

It’s all he needs to stride forward, gently take your face in his warm palms, and, seeing no hesitation in your eyes even as he searches your face desperately—presses his lips to yours.

The kiss is as soft and as tender as the man himself, which hardly surprises you. Your eyes slip closed as his lips move against you with aching caution. He’s careful in all things, including this–taking your cues, giving you the lead, letting you feel everything he’s giving you.

All too quickly, he pulls back–but his eyes only sweep your face again, a growing smile on his lips as he sees nothing but want reflected back at him. 

When he lowers his lips to yours again, he’s less gentle. One large hand leaves your face too hook around your waist, pulling you closer, closer–and when the proximity causes you to gasp softly, Marcus is ready. His tongue gently slips between your parted lips and you practically melt into him. When your knees buckle, his strong arms are what keep you standing upright, and still–

He can’t seem to stop kissing you. 

You break before he does–pulling back to suck in a few shaky, heaving breaths, and he smiles through his own labored breathing.

“I wanted–I–” he begins, before hastily pressing another kiss to the corner of your mouth as if he can’t help but do so. 

“I’ve thought of you,” he tries again. “I thought of you like this for the last month,” the confession finally spills out. “I wanted to–wanted to kiss you so badly all day, but I couldn’t. Couldn’t let myself.” He kisses you again. “But now,” he promises, whispering the words against your mouth. “Now I’m gonna get my fill.”

To punctuate his statement with one of your own, you slant your head and deepen the kiss, wrapping one hand around Marcus’s neck and pulling him closer still. He makes a soft noise in his throat, and the grip on your waist tightens. You lose yourself completely to the feel of his tongue sliding slowly against yours, until he suddenly pulls back.

“I’m doing this all wrong,” he whispers–although he’s still smiling. “I wanted to ask you out to dinner, first.”

“So ask me,” you say with a giggle.

“Come have dinner with me,” Marcus murmurs, shaking his head in quiet amusement as he steals another gentle kiss. “Right now. Tonight.”

“You might have to open all the doors,” you tease. “My arm hurts.”

Another kiss.

“I’m wounded that you think I wouldn’t open every door regardless.”

“Are you always such a gentleman?” you remark with a wry smile.

Another. 

“Well,” Marcus grins wolfishly. He places on last, lingering kiss on your lips and then makes a show of offering his arm. “Not always.”

[samd1o1]

The Disability Coding Of Aphelios

Hey everyone! Today I thought I'd write a little post about my comfort character Aphelios; The Weapon Of The Faithful from League Of Legends!

Specifically I wanted to talk about the disability coding of Aphelios. For those who don't know; coding means the character is written to be an allegory for a life experience. It's about the closest you can get to canon without being necessarily canon. Many stories in magical fantasy universes use this technique. The most common reasons are for hiding from censorship and backlash, and creativity. I personally find coding way more interesting because of all the ways people can think to use magic as an allegory. But I also understand the importance of canon representation. Luckily, Aphelios does both!

So let's start with base main universe Runeterra Aphelios. To be able to talk to his sister and access her weapons he has to drink a special moon flower poison. This poison causes him immense constant pain. It also renders him mute. Obviously he isn't technically disabled. He can choose to not drink the flower (though that would be a dumb decision). But the fact he *must* drink it to save his people and it leaves him to chronic pain and muteness to the point of becoming numb to the world. That screams chronic illness's that cause pain.

Now many League lore nerds are always quick to do an "uhm actually" when you call Aphelios mute. But they're not thinking of the coding of it. Like I said earlier; fantasy stories using coding is very common for many types of minorities, not just disabled people.

My favorite example of disability coding is Hunter from The Owl House. Hunter lives in a world full of witches but he has no magic. He struggles at times but is able to find a way to navigate the world. He uses his palisman as a disability aid and makes do.

Now I'd understand some people not seeing this or just denying it. But what they did with HEARTSTEEL Aphelios basically confirms to me the disability coding was intentional (or at the very least something they're sticking with).

HEARTSTEEL is a boy band in the League musicverse. If there was ever a time to make Aphelios speak, it would be a boy band that sings. But no they didn't do that. In fact they understood the music verse is a more grounded universe (hinted to be our own even) so they made him CANONICALLY disabled.

When Aphelios was younger he had nodes in his vocal cords and they had to be surgically removed. Aphelios never fully recovered and lost his singing voice and the majority of his normal voice. He can't really speak above a whisper. In interviews he whispers to his sister Alune and she answers for him. (Someone teach this poor man sign language).

Another thing I find cool about HEARTSTEEL Aphelios is how he copes. Aphelios is the lyricist of the band. Kayn and Sett's verses are very in character for themselves but K'sante's fits Aphelios as a character way better.

"They wanna kiss me long good night with a rose

Hoping that the Eiffel falls, of course

You don't understand the life we chose

(On life support, life goes)

I need my silence, my privacy so I can heal

And even rockstars got feelings that they feel

In reality, this just repeats like a drill

Always"

This verse shows Aphelios struggle with being disabled. He didn't choose this life, but life goes on. The best part of this verse is that his friends are his voice. The fact K'sante sung his lyrics is very powerful. Shown in the music video, his friends metaphorically (and literally) saved him from drowning.

I can speak from experience that friends are very important. They really can help you through the toughest times and save you from drowning.

(I also feel it is important to mention; that while it's beautiful that someone sung Apehlios thoughts for him. It is suspicious they chose the ONE black champion in the band. The other two who sang solo verses got to have screen time all to themselves for their verses. K'sante isn't present at all for his verse and it is instead Aphelios and Yone.)

Anyway that was a little infodump about Aphelios and why I love his disability coding. I really appreciate that Riot are keeping him mute in all universes so far. (My worst fear is a legendary skin where he speaks.) Riot has stated that while champions are different people with different life experiences in the alternate universes that the champions will keep their core identities. They were mainly referring to LGBTQ champs in this statement, but disability is also a major part of identity. I'm sure it applies here too. Sona has also stayed mute in all universes as far as I know (she just uses aids like telepathy and text to speech).

Anyway see you all later on the rift where I will OTP HEARTSTEEL Aphelios and maybe some Sett support because I'm gay.

[shiftingwithjaidyn]

🕸️,🍎, &🌊!

answering for my writer/fame dr

🕸️; where will you be when you first wake up in your dr? what clothes will you be in?

very basic, i know, but i'll wake up in my room! i want to wake up somewhere where i am already comfortable in (especially since i mostly do sleep methods.). plus, i really want to wake up to my sweetheart princess of meow meow kitty kingdom mari໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა i'm personally very obsessed in anything vintage and romanticizing my life in general/in every single universe being the drama queen that i amso i'll probably be wearing those pretty vintage slip-on night gowns/dresses

🍎; what are three songs that remind you of your dr and why?

● midnight city - m83 - this song reminds me so so sooo much of l.a. (it was a close tie between lady killers II by g-eazy) and the song itself is sort if adrenaline rush was a song which i'll most likely feel the moment i first shift. ● there she goes - the la's - this song is more on how i see myself in my dr/my vibes in my dr, y'know? i've always been a fan of 2000s rom-coms and i've always wanted to be sort of a main caracter in one, so i'm always so happy and thankful whenever someone says i do have that type of personality/aura and i'd like to have it in this reality as well! ● no 1. party anthem - arctic monkeys - this song can be interpreted in numerous ways and while majority of them are a pretty sad interpretation (and i can do a whole essay on every single one but let's do that some other time), i genuinely adore this song with my whole heart and consider it as a love song about me and my dr s/o. there's a specific verse in its bridge "the look of love, the rush of blood. the "she's with me"s, the gallic shrug. the shutterbugs, the camera plus the black & white and the colour dodge." that brings me to my knees and make me go "hey that's us!". me and my dr s/o sort of have a love at first sight (the look of love, the rush of blood) friends-to-lovers trope, so obviously there's a lot of mutual pining and slow burn there, but i think it's sort of bittersweet to have those moments. not in a "oh, i want to be cheesy and corny and blah" (which you can do obviously but that is not my intention here personally), but in a "we get the chance to understand each other to a deeper level that no one else can, but there's this risk, and it's up to us if we want to take it or not.". especially with the fact that we don't act upon our feelings until much later (thought a lot of our friends already speculate || "the "she's with me"s, the gallic shrug") also connects me to this song more for this song is a representation of longing and yearning for someone who you're unsure if they like you back especially knowing everyone has their eyes on the both of you (because he's a well-known actor and i'm a well-known writer || "the camera plus the black & white and the colour dodge") (there's so much words for the last song omg i'm so sorry y'all my lover girl slipped out of her cage.)

🌊; pretend your dr has one of those filler-beach-day episodes. what’s everyone doing?

omgg this reminded me of a scene in this show i'm a part of in my dr (yellowjackets) where it does have a filler-beach-day episode (well more like scene and they were in a lake but whateverrr) anyway, going back to the question! i'm mostly close with drag queens in my dr since i've worked for rupaul's drag race (the og and all stars) for about 10 years so i can only imagine most of the queens like shea couleé, trixie mattel, katya zamolodchikova, violet chacki, jaida essence hall, plastique tiara, etc. relaxing in the corner enjoying the sun and other queens like nymphia wind, dawn, gottmik, symone, plasma, kandy muse, xunami muse, morphi, naomi smalls, bob the drag queen, monet x change, etc. probably ready to drown each other during a game of beach volleyball. (i'm so sorry if this answer's like super messy and not accurate to the question my head is so empty rn HDJKFHSKFHDSJ)

this was such a fun questionnaire session tysmmm gaiaaa!!!! <3333

[starmo]

hey! Big fan of your BTTF fics! I only recently got (back) into BTTF, but it seems you’ve been here for a few years, plus you’re an nsfw author in this fandom, so I was wondering if you might have some insight on why Mammett is practically the only ship with lots of nsfw material? The only straight ships I’ve seen is Marty/Lorraine or Marty/OC. Why no Marty/Jennifer, or George/Lorraine, or even Doc/Clara? I want some nsfw Marty/Jennifer so bad and can’t find it anywhere! Did it ever exist? Was it deleted? Hope you don’t mind the random horny. Just curious and want someone to ask/rant to, one BTTF fan to another :)

Hey there! Thanks for your inquiry! I am so glad to hear that you're a fan of my work! 😄

I actually haven't any clue as to why mammett recieves more attention from NSFW creators. Believe it or not, this surprisingly comes as a shock to me!

Though my allegiance is sworn to mammett (😂), I had been under the impression that it was the least popular of the ships typically associated w/ BTTF, on account of it's... divisiveness? For lack of a better term.

Though, if I were to reckon a guess as to why it's so beloved by degenerates (jk) like myself, I'd say it has just as much to do with the taboo nature of their relationship as hating mammett for it is!

Which is exactly why it doesn't surprise me that one of the only heteronormative ships from BTTF that recieves an abundance of attention is Lorraine x Marty.

Like mammett, Lorraine x Marty involves two individuals whose sexual/romantic relationship would be met with disapproval (because, y'know, incest), which just makes for a fun jaunt when it comes to writing smut fic. The juicier and more depraved, the better!

Aside from that, though there are many other reasons as to why I (and likely many others) are attached to Doc x Marty--I think a major contributing factor to the abundant creation of NSFW mammett fic is the fact that much of what we see of their on-screen interactions (of the physical variety, especially) is interlaced w/ homoerotic subtext, albeit (likely) unintentionally.

That and taking their age gap into account, and the time in which BTTF is set, when homosexuality was still HIGHLY frowned upon, it kind of makes for a deliciously provocative "torrid love affair" type deal.

And, I (personally) am also very much attracted to both Christopher Lloyd and Michael J Fox (hence why I've so many rarepairs involving their characters 😂) which only adds fuel to the "I want to see them bang" fire.

In summary, Doc and Marty tick off all the boxes for somebody like me (in both a "omg, my otp, I wanna cry, I love them so much!!" type way, and a "I want to see Doc absolutely DESTROY Marty" type way). I imagine people must feel similarly about ships like Lorraine x Marty, George x Marty, etc.

I guess the more canon-typical ships like Jennifer x Marty and Clara x Doc haven't as much allure to NSFW writers on account of the fact that they'e likely considered to be "vanilla"? Though I can only speculate on that.

As for your frustrations in this regard, I completely understand. Scouring the tags on ao3 or similar websites in search of at least just one fic involving a ship you're invested in, only to come up short, is one of the most infuriating things in the world.

I take similar issue w/ trans Marty vs cis Marty fics.

I am one of very few mammett fic writers who solely portray Marty as being trans, and that is largely due to the fact that as a trans man myself, I wanted to see more pre-op trans representation in smut fics; something which was virtually non-existent in the fandom prior to my contributions.

I also like to write smut fic for a wide variety of niche audiences; though some of the things I've written about and or plan to write about in the future aren't necessarily kinks of my own, I still want to offer something else to the fandom aside from the repetative "Doc and Marty have flowery prose gay sex in the garage" fics (not that there's anything wrong w/ those fics, but admittedly after reading about 6 or 7 of them I tend to go "but where's the pizazz??" ..."pizazz" being the nastiest shit you can conceive of, of course, lmao).

To this day one of my all-time favorite fics I've aided in the creation of is the one where Marty is a gas-station attendant and he and Doc end up banging by the dumpster in the back alleyway behind Marty's workplace.

Not only is it deliciously, viscerally filthy, but they (being Doc and Marty) are also still very much themselves; their affection and fondness for one another knows no bounds, and thus doesn't feel out of place even in a fic involving watersports, armpit licking and non-con kink.

Perhaps now that I know there is an audience for it, in the form of, at least, you, I could try my hand at writing some Jennifer x Marty or Clara x Doc fics!

I've only two WIPS as of right now that involve a Jennifer x Marty sex scene (sorta...); that being a fic in which Jennifer is present when an experiment involving some chemicals (of the horny variety) goes awry and Doc is in dire need of uh... relief--and a sequel fic to Nocturnal Emissions that immediately begins with Jennifer eating Marty out.

These are two fics that I hope to complete and upload at some point, but in the meantime, if you're curious (and/or would like to talk more about mammett/BTTF in general) feel free to DM me and I'd be more than happy to share what I've written for these fics w/ you! 😄

[writteninlunarlight-years]

Hey can I asl for a Bg3 match up? :D

Gender:Male

Pronouns:He/him and they/them

Sexuality: Gay

Race: High elf

Class: he's multiclass Wizard and Bard

D&d alignment: Chaotic neutral

Appearance: Red-ish hair with some light "graying" its more caramelly but like graying anyways, he has heterochromia, his right eye is brown snd left one is light brown. He's dresses very eccentricly and likes wearing long robes with the main colors being dark blue and a magentay red and lots lots lots of jewelry, he's around 170cm or 5'7 ish

Personality: Confident, creative, definetly a problem solver, aloof from time to time, extremely emotional has not know a day of peace with how many emotions his tiny smooth brain can hold. They're wise but the intelligence department is lacking a little tiny winy bit, his brain only retains fun facts and obscure knowledge.

Likes: Cats, pigeons, plants, herbs, herbal tea, coffee, sweets and lots of em, owning books without reading them and obscure spells.

Dislikes: Crowds, loud people, shoes are the bane of his existence, spicy food, silver as a color, his own ears and paper that's thin enough to see through.

Extra fun facts: He has stage fright which is why he has to know how to do other types of magic too, he's befriended every cat he's met and the mf grins like the cat who got the cream all the time... even when he shouldn't even be smiling, he gets into trouble for that.

I hope I did that right :) Have a nice day/night and tha k you :D

I love how sweet all of you guys are in my Asks. I should be the one apologizing cause I have so many accidental spelling mistakes, lol.

~~~~~ MATCH UP ~~~~~

Anon I love your character 10/10. Whether they are a representation of you or not, I love them! I match you with-------

Gale Dekarios

This ticking time bomb of a man (Literally, man is a bomb) loves your comedic sense and the fact he can relate to a true connoisseur of Magic. It's like the Weave made you two for one another.

~~~~~ HEADCANONS ~~~~~

Gale loves your shows when you perform; watching you use the Weave and your other talents impresses him greatly.

He has no problem helping you reconnect with the Weave if you struggle with a spell. (We all know the scene I am thinking of 0.0)

Gale enjoys learning your fun facts and feels like it connects him to you better. It also helps him keep up with what interests you.

Gale hesitates to start walking around shoelessly with you; however, when you two are in his tower, he doesn't mind humoring you.

Gale knew you were the one when Tara accepted you right away.

Correction: Gale knew you were the one when you and Tara ganged up on him and decided your new pastime was picking on him.

(I Wonder if it's just my dialogue scenes or everyone else's, but Gale also has an issue with smiling 24/7, even if there's something horrible going on. Like using runepowder to murder the whole Underdark on accident)

Gale loves to 'borrow' from your book collection to help you continue learning about the Weave.

~~~~~ BLURB ~~~~~

You stood atop the ruined stage at the fairgrounds, decrepit since you guys got rid of the imposters. Your group decided to set up camp here while waiting out at the location of the Nether Brain. As you began practicing the magic show you used to perform before the parasite, a lone Wizard stood by on watch. Gale loved watching you enjoy yourself; nothing set his heart more alight than watching you learn and process things.

Conjuring up a seat, he continued watching as you cast a fireball, quickly switching to an iceblast and causing an explosion similar to a firework. As you continued step by step, you could feel someone's eyes on you. Becoming more meticulous with your casts, you started to lose connection to the Weave. Noticing this, Gale smiled and began to walk over to you. "My dear, what seems to be the matter?" You look to Gale and sigh, frustrated that you forgot such a basic routine due to stage fright. Gale shook his head then stood behind you, "Close your eyes love and follow Mystras guidance, let the Weave move you, forget any eyes on you just flow with the Weave."

You closed your eyes, noting Gale was moving around you now. As you started the basic incantation for a mage hand, you were pulled out of your trance by a swift peck on the cheek from the Wizard before you. Shooting your eyes open, you turn to him with a smug smirk. "Rule number one, don't become distracted, Rule number two, stop looking so handsome while you focus."

~~~~~ EXTRA ~~~~~

(Tara and you were lounging about in the sun on the balcony of Waterdeep Tower. As you two were resting, a grumpy Gale appeared)

Gale: I woke up from my nap to find my lover and cat gone.

(Tara raises her head slightly, yawning)

Tara: Hmmm, it seems I am more critical to your elf than you are, Mr. Dekarios.

(Gale stands there in shock; before he can turn on his heel, he hears Y/N speak)

Y/N: On a scale of one to ten, Tara, how funny was his face? Be honest with me.

(Gale didn't even have to turn around to know you had a giant smile on your face)

[lucienarcheron]

As one of your Black followers it makes me really feel a type of way that you’re constantly bringing up Black people when you’re talking about Helion and Lucien. I get you want your rep and that’s totally valid but the way you constantly express that desire comes off as you being angry at the black community for wanting some more rep, too. And that’s fucked up.

We can headcanon different things and that’s okay, but what’s not cool to me is you telling people that we’re in the wrong for having our own headcanons (especially when they’re representation related). You have a difference in opinion and that’s your business, but the least you could do is keep Black people out of it. You don’t have to say “why do people always say he’s Black” “he’s not Black” etc etc when you’re talking about this — fight for your rep and keep us out of it.

Your issue should be with SJM for failing to adequately portray race in acotar, NOT with people for wanting helion/Lucien to be Black. Do better.

Honestly, I'm really glad you brought this up with me. Going to put it under a read more!

I never ever want to come off that way, especially to fellow people of color. I can see how the way I speak about this frustration of mine can come off that way but please know, it is never my intention ever for it to be read that way. For that, I am sorry. I really do apologize for ever making you feel like that and this is a general apology to any other friends/followers where my frustration has made them feel that way. Please know that is never the case. Ever!

My frustration is always directed at SJM first because her lack of writing POC characters well leaves us in spaces where we feel unseen. My other big frustration is with readers (many times white readers) who have a very specific idea of race and start pulling out their color charts and telling me, a woman of color, that the way I think of Lucien and Helion isn't correct. My issue becomes with how over the years those types of fans don't listen to a woman of color straight up telling them "Hey, there are other sides to this! There is more than one way to view this character!" I've been vagued about how I view Helion even though it comes from a place of trying to give room for other interpretations of this character. Since knowing that the artist who worked with SJM to create the coloring book aimed at a Persian-inspired Helion, I will always view him that way. To me, that is canon. He will always be a brown man to me. To me, he isn't black, and when people come at me for saying that, it feels like we're erasing one POC in favor of another. You may like to view him and headcanon him as black and you should absolutely feel comfortable to do so but it also shouldn't be at the expense of Middle Eastern rep. For example, to me — it is clear as day that Tarquin and many of the people of the Summer Court are black with no questions. Helion is not because dark-skinned doesn't always equal black. We all want to feel seen in our favorite stories and I would never want to make people feel like I'm trying to sour that for them but I also don't want people souring it for me.

My other issue becomes with readers (again, many times it being white readers) who headcanon both Helion and Lucien as black, stating it like it's fact, and then trying to make those who don't make Helion/Lucien a specific shade of brown or say that they don't see them as black feel like they're wrong. The one thing we can all agree on is that they're not white but we also have to remember, race isn't viewed the same way everywhere and that above all else, is the message I want to get across whenever I bring him up. People of color don't exist in one way or have one specific look or one specific shade of "brown". Let's be real, SJM is a white woman, and her "golden brown" is like a super tan white person lol. But also, tan is a color people of color have. There's this one family I always use as an example because they're half arab and half white but those kids straight up look like redheaded white kids lol. And it's not just about skin tone (though this is always what comes up first). It's also about drawing these characters with Middle Eastern features that don't happen. My frustration always comes down to how color/race is discussed with this one lens without considering how, outside of the US/Europe, people do not see it the same way. Especially when it's white readers trying to tell people of color what shade of color these characters should be. People don't like to consider that Lucien is "white-passing" but that is a thing in many cultures because people of color can still be light-skinned.

Your "do better" at the end feels a tad condescending and this ask feels overall a little rude but I want to give you the benefit of the doubt that you're truly trying to be helpful and coming from a place of friendship. I hope you extend me the same grace knowing that anything I've said is all said from a place of love and understanding. I think in general, we all can do better, especially fellow POCs in the fandom, to uplift each other and give each other space to be/feel seen.

And because this is a topic discussed by quite a few people in the fandom on tumblr/discord today specifically, I want to make it very very VERY clear — I am not being vague about anyone. I am not trying to target anyone with this response. This is not meant for a specific person or group of people. These are my overall thoughts because I've been in this fandom space for years and these conversations keep happening.

I am 100% trying to come from a very respectful place with this response because I know that these kinds of conversations can be awkward and uncomfortable for people. Please know, that my intentions are never to harm or make anyone feel bad but I hope people also extend that grace and understanding to me and my perspective on it. I always want my blog to be a safe space and welcoming for everyone. This fandom and the people in it have been a significant part of my life and joy for so long so it's important to me that none of this is taken in any negative context. I appreciate you bringing this up to me.

[arlathvhenan]

hey, just wanted to thank you for your and kaija-rayne-author's post about Solas being ND. I only got super deeply into him very recently and it's been fun but also... incredibly distressing and disheartening, and i couldn't quite put my finger on why. im usually fine with ppl disliking characters i like, but so many of the opinions on him were very two dimensional and simplistic or outright hostile. just... yeah. i appreciate you typing all that out. it rly helped clarify part of why i gravitate towards him so much and part of why it's been so upsetting to see how he gets treated by some of the fandom.

You’re welcome, and I get it. I’m not normally this defensive when it comes to fictional characters. I’m so used to the fandoms treating my favorites better than the actual writers that this situation is downright unprecedented XD

NDs have to stick together and stand up for each other because clearly no one else will.

Yes, Solas is ultimately just a fictional character. He’s an idea, but how people respond to certain ideas, even in fiction, says a lot about them and what they believe. It’s generally never a one to one. Things like tone, context, and framing matter. For example I’m not going to try and argue that anybody who really loves Dennis Reynolds from Always Sunny is somehow a bad person for finding such an awful person entertaining.

That said, there’s a big difference between finding a character entertaining and actually relating to them on an emotional level. And connecting with a character emotionally is not only one of the most rewarding aspects of fiction, it’s also a huge component of what makes for good representation.

Wether or not Weekes intended to write Solas as neurodivergent is ultimately irrelevant. Authorial intent can only go so far. At the end of the day what matters is what the actual text tells us and how the audience responds to it.

The fact that many neurodivergent fans of Dragon Age identify so strongly with him is all it really takes for him to be a neurodivergent coded character. And as we’ve established over and over, neurodivergent people have a pretty difficult time finding good representation.

I really shouldn’t need to explain why representation matters in goddamn 2023, and I honestly don’t have the energy to right now. What I will say is I sure hope we don’t need to re-explain that shit because I thought it was pretty common knowledge by now but I digress…

As I said earlier, it’s never a one to one with fiction, but overall you can gauge a person’s capacity for empathy and emotional intelligence based on their relationships with fiction. And the way people talk in this fandom sometimes…it’s honestly pretty alarming just how little emotional intelligence factors in to the way people formulate their opinions. It makes you wonder just how much of their attitude towards a fictional character with neurodivergency translates to the way they see and treat actual people.

I’m not saying disliking Solas as a character automatically means you must hate neurodivergent people, but a lot if the arguments I see people use to defend their position are either:

1) Factually inaccurate or otherwise misrepresent/misinterpret the facts

Or

2) Sound like a lot if the same shit people have said to or about me because they don’t know how to properly deal with or respond to neurodivergent people.

That first one is just frustrating, but the second one hurts. And the idea that flagrantly offending an entire group of people with no remorse simply because you can’t empathize with them is considered acceptable? That really sucks. It just sucks to think about.

[so-i-grudgingly-joined-this-site]

I don't like Thessaly all that much and there is a lot of reasons to dislike her character but I do think there is a double standard when it comes to the whole transphobia thing espeically in comparison to George who is a clear out and out transphobic. And maybe there are reasons maybe George doesn't get hate is because he's a much more minor character compared to Thessaly who is still minor herself but has a bigger role or because people don't see Thessaly as being good for Dream which one can debate the other way as well though I do think Dream's overall morals are better than Thessaly's but I can't help but think it's down to misogyny or at least it's partly down to that. Like I said I don't like Thessaly but I also don't like the double standard of how women and men are treated differently and this also happens in real life.

Oh yeah, I'd definitely say misogyny is a large part of it. Fandom loves any excuse to hate on a female character, especially one who "gets in the way" of self-shipping or a more popular non-canon ship for their (usually male) fave. Thessaly just happens to be a rare case where she ALSO is legitimately terrible. The fact that she's also terrible in a way that corresponds to a current hot-topic issue likewise gives people easy "brownie points" for hating on her, because fans can frame it in a faux-activist way that comes across as "cool" on tumblr or twitter.

And as for George, I'm not sure if it's because he's a minor character, or, sadly, if it's more "expected" for a man to be cruel towards a woman. The fact that he's presented as villainous to begin with likewise gives him something of a "free pass" to express bigoted views, because hey, he's obviously supposed to be evil anyway. Thessaly is at least marginally heroic in that she's helping our protagonist Barbie (although she ultimately does more harm than good), so hearing her be bigoted is more potentially shocking and disappointing to a reader. Of course, this misses the major theme of the story where everyone, including powerful or divine figures, can be flawed, wrong, or bigoted. Neil himself emphasizes this in The Sandman Companion interviews about A Game of You: the moon rules are supposed to be taken as outdated/bigoted for only accepting menstruating people as women, and Thessaly isn't supposed to be a "heroic" or aspirational figure.

(Also, as a side note: The Companion also states that Dream and Thessaly were supposed to not make sense and be a "wtf why are they together?" type pair. However, given that The Companion often seems to be nudging readers to see Dream in a negative light, it's not exactly clear why they would be "obviously" bad for each other...)

I have to say, Thessaly's TERF reputation preceded her before I got to A Game of You in the comics, and I was actually surprised at how little of her personality that is compared to her other unpleasant actions. I expected her to be full-on "author-who-shall-no-longer-be-named", but basically she makes one transphobic comment before instead doing a spell that causes mass destruction and presumable mass death by moving the moon and thus bringing the storm into the city. She also cruelly sacrifices animals at multiple points in her appearances. I mean, it's all bad, obviously, but the fact that the fandom hones in on ONE particular thing to hate her for, out of the MANY reasons she's hate-able, makes me wonder how much is performative activism.

And on one last note... we all need to talk about Wanda more. Seriously. She's far more than just "groundbreaking representation" or "a victim of transphobia". The Sandman Companion rightly points out that she embodies the intended message of the arc: that everyone should be able to change and define themselves as they wish, the will of any alleged authority be damned. Plus, in a series where the central conflict of the protagonist is ultimately about needing to gain self-knowledge and the willingness to change...Wanda is the one who actually MANAGES that! She, a normal human person, does what an Endless cannot. Of course, the inspiration kind of falls flat in that both her and Dream end up equally tragically dead. But still, she's a very notable foil in the overall themes of The Sandman.

[zoobus]

You said to ask how you felt about Kato in Green Hornet so I'm doing just that

Keep in mind I haven't seen this movie in like ten years so the mental essaypost I made has faded and become inaccurate with time

Green Hornet (2011) was a fun movie overall, a surprisingly not-bad January release. Pretty funny, quick action, looked cool.

Again, I am ten years removed from the essays I loved to read examining and analyzing racial depictions in Hollywood, but I'd say the desexualization of Asian men is fairly well known? You'd see an Asian man in a leading role and a hot girl in the hot girl role (you know how it is, plz excuse the implied misogyny) and somehow they would never end up together for some strange reason. I know there's a long list of Romoe-Must-Die type movies out there (because I read it that list 10+ years ago):

I've seen plenty of action movies and seeing some tragic shit has never stopped the impenetrable force of stupid action movie romantic hook-ups, ever.

Anyway, Green Hornet spent most of its time looking like it would transcend the stereotype of weirdly cockblocking their rare Asian male lead - it's made abundantly clear that Kato (Jay Chou) is 100000% cooler, smarter, sexier than the Hornet (Seth Rogan). (Side note, I think this was the first movie I ever saw of Seth Rogan and how come no one's ever commented on the fact that he sounds like Grover Monster from Sesame Street? I thought he was doing a bit for the first third of the movie). Kato is slick, manipulative in a badass way. After he and Hornet meet Cameron Diaz' character, not only is their romantic tension between them, it's obvious they hook up. Kato was not going to this woman's house at night for actual "piano lessons," come on.

So hey, representation, we finally got a Hollywood movie where the Asian guy wins right? Wrong. Kato and Hornet get in some stupid boy-fight near the end of the movie and Kato, clearly in the heat of the moment, vulgarly says he fucked Cameron Diaz' character, knowing Hornet will seethe will jealousy over it. And seethe he does! Mr. tattletale runs crying to her and repeats all the stuff his friend said, Diaz gets mad and insists they never did anything together, he's lying (she's lying), and...their relationship is over I guess. She kind of forgives him, but it's over.

You could read that as empowering since hey, how many times have we seen a male lead insult and degrade the trophy romantic girl for minor plot conflict, only for her to quickly forgive him before the story wraps up? For once we have a woman stand up for herself and cut that toxicity out of her life. She's not dating either of them by the movie's end - uncommon for an action movie!

I just couldn't help but note that the rare moment of no one winning the girl coincides with the rare moment an Asian dude had a genuine chance of doing so.

I could never find it now but I saw The Green Hornet right after I saw another movie that I don't remember the title of but I'll call "Russian movie about a magical car that is somehow a ripoff of Spider-man (2002) you'll have to trust me on this." At one point in that movie not!peterparker publicly slutshames not!maryjane for like...no reason. he was mad about his magic car and takes his fury out by degrading his girl to her face, in front of their peers, in class while she gawks at him. Nothing she did prompted this, he just uses her as a punching bag. And at the end? She forgives him. They get back together. The end.

It's not hollywood, but made me think about how common less extreme versions of that are and highlighted the disparities. Kato's outburst is, again, vulgar, but it felt like a heat of the moment thing, a private tantrum that his character would regret after calming down regardless, a personal moment that should have stayed between friends. IMO it came across like oh, asian lead? I'm a feminist now. We gotta give women agency, we have to let women know men aren't ENTITLED to their bodies, and we have to send that message right now, before there's a chance of this guy emasculating a white man.

but hey maybe it was a coincidence

[kingofthewilderwest]

Hey! I don't know if you've done these already but do you have any HTTYD sexuality headcanons for the gang? If you've already done a list, could you just link me to it?? tysm

Gosh, I know I've talked about it, but I don't think I've written a list before. So [singing] let's get down to business.

My headcanons tend to be "boring" compared to other fans. Many people like to headcanon based on representation they want or is relevant to their lives, which is totes fair! My headcanons tend to be based as close as possible to canonical behavior. I interpret all media I read, watch, and play through a lore-collecting angle, building my new ideas off "firmly grounded" canonical facts. It's conservative (not politically, but from, like, a "you gotta prove this to me" cautiousness).

I will add small headcanons that I know the creators didn't intend, but I try to make everything closely match canon portrayal and how the creators evoked the characters. This means I tend to treat "if the creators didn't show signs a character is queer, I don't see that character as queer" - simply because I prefer to treat characters as queer when they are blunt, outright representations of queerness. But "if the creators kept the door wide open for something to feel heckin' queer," my headcanon may go there. Not always, but they might.

-----------------------------

Hiccup: Straight. Eyes only for butt-kicking ladies like Astrid. I don't treat it as IC for Hiccup, but I do like Hijack art. That statement ages me, doesn't it?

Astrid: Straight or bi. Depends on my mood. If I'm thinking about Hiccstrid, straight. If I'm thinking about Heatstrid, well. Haha. I know they wanted Heatstrid to be a friendship and I love me a good friendship between women. But Heatstrid is too fun. Give myself Heatstrid as a treat.

Heather: Straight or bi. See above.

Fishlegs: Straight.

Snotlout: I will die on a hill that my boy Snottykins is bi. I mean. Come on. He was a squealing mess around Thor Bonecrusher. Snotlout puts on "macho" airs, which includes how he treats women. It's "manly" to flirt openly with women, right? [eyeroll] I believe he was attracted to the ladies he hit on, but that's the only side of himself he shared, and he dug deep into that "masculine" image. His character arc in DreamWorks Dragons is someone increasingly comfortable opening up and being himself. By RTTE times, he's loosened up enough to drop some falsified hyper-masculine behavior, and with that, we see his attractions aren't limited to women.

He can't contain himself around TB. “I’m just thinking of what could have been. You broke my heart, Thor, you broke it right in two.” *kiss* We're seeing a sincere Snotlout here. He's wearing his heart on his sleeve. You're not telling me someone like Snotlout would kiss someone unrelated to him without being attracted to them.

Ruffnut: Bi. I've seen how she smirks at Heather. I see Ruffnut as a pretty sexual person.

Tuffnut: Aro. Very ace. Which rhymes with mace. OTP Tuffnut x Macey for life. I'm appreciative that Tuff never shows romantic or physical interest in someone else. He's shown distinctly differently than others there. And he seems content where he's at.

Dagur: No one's gonna agree with me on this one but straight. I see Dagur's interest in Hiccup as unhinged obsession, not sexual or romantic attraction. I don't care for the Dagur and Mala thing that happened in the plot, and I headcanoned Dagur as straight from the beginning, but I might as well say: Dagur treats Mala extremely differently when he's interested in her versus his interest in Hiccup. Part of that is character arc. But I also say that's because it's a different type of interest.

Stoick: Straight. But we know he and Gobber are in an honorary relationship. ;) Hiccup's dads.

Gobber: Gay. Any romantic entanglements Gobber had with women in his youthful years I interpret as someone not fully come to an understanding of himself. Gobber clearly knows where he stands by HTTYD 2 times.

[pokemonbiologyirlthetabletop]

Sylveon (#700)

Sylveon (#700)

Mutabellus fabulamor

General Information: Sylveon is able to produce a soothing aura through its ribbon-like feelers (yes, that’s what those things are on its body, feelers), which can be used to lower hostilities and even end conflicts. Sometimes, while trying to calm someone/something down, it will use its feelers to perform a dance. These feelers are also used to, for example, wrap around someone’s arm in order for Sylveon to understand the individual’s feelings. Alternatively, it may use its dancing feelers to distract its prey, then pounce. Sylveons are also known for being very brave Pokémon who will charge head-first at Pokémon far bigger than itself in an effort to protect others, especially dragon-type Pokémon. In lands where Dynamaxing/Gigantamaxing exists, the Sylveon’s bravery is often the subject of folkloric praise.

Some suspect a connection to a strong source of magic in the environment, like Leafeon or Glaceon, and others still think its evolution is in the same grouping as Umbreon and Espeon (an evolution based on love), but ultimately no one is entirely sure because wild Sylveon are very rare. It is hard to study Pokémon evolution if wild counterparts are hard to come by, after all.

Habitat: They live mostly in temperate forests, or in and around human settlements. Wild specimens are few and far between.

Diet: Omnivore, will eat just about anything you give them that is actually food. They do not have the same high energy needs as Jolteons and Flareons, but they are on average the largest of the Eeveelutions. Large creatures typically need to eat more than smaller ones. Don’t worry, your Sylveon will in fact probably try to use Baby-Doll Eyes on you to get you to share your pizza with it.

Conservation: Least Concern

Relationship to Humans: Sylveons are highly associated with human settlements by a wide margin greater than any other Eeveelution, either the ones known to science or the ones that remain undiscovered or exist primarily in folklore. In universe, this is not really understood why and it provides strong evidence for why many scientists believe that Sylveons are in the same evolutionary grouping as Umbreon and Espeon. On a meta level, we know this is because wild Eevees probably do not experience enough strong affection levels in time before they evolve into something else, so basically the same reason that Umbreons and Espeons are not terribly common either compared to Glaceons, Leafeons, Vaporeons, Flareons, and Jolteons.

Sylveons can be found in just about any job field under any type of person or trainer. They are difficult to raise an Eevee to evolve into, but any trainer with enough love, care, and determination can achieve a Sylveon evolution.

In order for someone to become a Great Rank-Certified Pokémon Breeder (the next rank above a Certified Breeder), that person must have a Sylveon that they raised from an Eevee, and it must be documented (unless another Pokémon that evolves with the Affection mechanic is introduced). This is a non-optionable requirement. As such, Sylveons are often seen as one of the many symbols/mascots of the Pokémon Breeder world, alongside Togepi.

Sylveons are common sights in healthcare settings because of their calming abilities and ability to read someone’s emotions. They are incredibly supportive Pokémon.

Additionally, Sylveons are often associated with the transgender community due to its colorations (both regular and shiny) being the same as the transgender pride flag. Sylveons and Azumarills are often paired together as Pokémon representations of transgender pride.

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Hey guess what, if you like my stuff, this is my website where you can find other Pokémon I've written on and more information about the game that I’m slowly making! Check it out! I write books sometimes too.

[ace-thinks]

how do i know if I wrote my main female character as asexual properly?

Hey! This is an interesting question, and a little tricky to answer without context, but here are some things that come to mind:

How does her asexuality come up?

Is it unspoken? If so, then even though you may personally know she's ace, that may not be clear to the reader. Since asexuality can't really be "demonstrated" through actions the way other queer identities can be, it's important to actually say the word "ace" or "asexual" when you have an ace character.

Is there a "coming out" moment? If so, what does it look like? For a lot of ace people, coming out can involve a long (and oftentimes awkward) explanation of what asexuality means since it's still largely misunderstood. If you go that route in your story, you need to be extremely careful about how you explain asexuality from the POV of your character. Remember, although everyone experiences asexuality differently, there are some core truths about what asexuality is (and isn't) and you need to make sure you understand those if you plan to explain it in your story.

How does her asexuality show up?

Is asexuality framed as a tragedy/defect/shorthand for otherness? If your character mourns her asexuality without ever reaching a point of positivity or acceptance in the story, then this could feed into a harmful narrative that exists around asexuality—which is that all ace people are (or should be) sad about never getting to experience "love."

Likewise, if your character's aceness is wrapped up in her being an alien/robot/some other type of non-human entity, that could feed into the idea that ace people are inherently inhuman or that aceness is itself an alien trait.

If your character does happen to be "inhuman" in some way, ask yourself why you're making her ace. Is it to further emphasize the fact that she's different? If so, there are likely better ways to communicate that fact without involving asexuality.

Does acephobia play a role in the story? If so, why? Unless you want to totally ground your story in reality, you can decide whether or not discrimination and prejudice exist in your world. If you decide to bring those into your narrative, make sure you're doing it with purpose. What is it adding to your story? Can that be achieved without involving acephobia?

For ace readers, seeing stories that include asexuality without negativity can be like a breath of fresh air. For allo readers, seeing asexuality normalized in stories can help them start to see it as something to be accepted rather than questioned/ridiculed. If acephobia isn't critical to your plot, consider leaving it out.

Is asexuality the point of her character? Being ace is a relevant part of our identities, but it's not the point of who we are as people. Think about how your character's friends would describe her outside of her orientation. If all they'd be able to say is "she's the ace one," then try to flesh her out more. Make her a full person with goals, flaws, quirks, etc. One-dimensional characters tend to feel more like tokens than genuine representation.

Also, unless her asexuality is integral to the plot (like maybe she's learning to accept herself, navigating relationships, etc.) she likely wouldn't have much reason to talk about it that often. People who are new to the identity tend to bring it up a lot since it's still fresh, and some "elder aces" might still crack the occasional joke about it, but for the most part it's not a huge point of conversation. If you're mentioning your character's asexuality repeatedly in your story, make sure you have a good reason to—otherwise it could start to feel forced and unnatural.

That's all I got off the top of my head, but I welcome thoughts from other aces out there!

[larrythefloridaman]

hey. thoughts on The End?

will wood's Memento Mori: The Most Important Thing In The World type motherfucker. he hunted winston overwatch for sport and for that I have to respect him. this being said this guy would've done numbers in 2012 tumblr sexyman culture

its fitting in a karmic, Frankenstein-y sort of way that prism went down fighting a monster of her own creation, a manifestation of the fear and entropy and disillusion that made her become a monster that reflects her own cheery detached evil back at her, even if she went down triumphant over said fears, but at the same time its... sort of funny. she made up a guy to get mad at for the last time, and finally conquering her fear took the form of dragging them down with her to protect everything else. At once a lovely representation of how people can grow through exploring what they fear in fiction, and... kind of an ironic reprisal of the same sort of thing that put her in this position in the first place.

The End (of the story,) is, in fact, eventually, inevitable, as such i think its unlikely we've seen the last of him. And while he has an inconsiderate, detached perspective on what he does, endings arent necessarily a bad thing, and we cant forget hes Pretty New in the grand scheme of things. The grim reaper who has no appreciation for the lives it takes will be a cruel and lonely one who is not living well.

I think of the Lord of Snakes and its new Special Little Guy sort of in the same way i think of the necessity of predatory and decomposing forces in an ecosystem. Like wolves and mushrooms. That which ends may die, and its not pretty, and it may feel cruel to see a lion stalk and hunt a little gazelle, but it has to eat, and both their corpses will go on to feed other things, as things must be broken down by consumption and the natural process of decay. Nothing comes from nothing. The cycle is unbroken. it is just as natural for the animals to flee and fight this tooth and nail. There is, of course, unethical consumption grown out of control and also the unethical prolonging of living things, but consumption and decay and creation and preservation are in and of themself morally neutral things when removed from all other factors and context. To me, the End is only like that because he was born out of Prism's fear- and thus born interpreted into being as something hostile. Anyway.

Cobalt, thinking he's a god of life and death when he's really a god of balance: (had an ethics crisis over the nature of death and constructing a poorly thought through system resulting in countless deaths in and the ultimate destruction of an off-screen world due to cobalt being hypocritically unable to look death in the eye and make peace with its inherent and unfixable unfairness without abstracting it into something he cant be held fully responsible for)

The End, newborn god of finality, emerging fully formed knowing what they're about like aphrodite from the foam in a world doomed to die not long after its birth:

[what-if-i-just-did]

Writing Multi-lingual Characters

Nobody asked for this but as a multi-lingual writer I just wanna make this.

firstly, stereotypes.

can we please have bilingual characters who speak other languages than english/spanish??? please???

can we have characters with english as a main?

in fact, can we have white bilingual characters? *gasps are heard*

Yes, poc representation is good and important. And I'm not saying 'make your bilingual poc character white'. I'm saying, I'm white, I speak three languages and all the multi-lingual representation ever is usually a latinex who speaks spanish as a main and english as a secondary, usually a girl. I don't think I've ever seen a bilingual white character in anything main-stream. Can we have white characters who speak Russian or French or heaven forbid, something less main-stream like Flemish or Swedish?

Types

There's three types of ways to be multi-lingual. I'm sure they have official names, but I usually call them Raised, Moved and Learnt.

Moved

Most of the bilingual representation we see is Moved. A Moved bilingual character will have a main language and a secondary language; usually Spanish and English. I speak Afrikaans pretty much like I'm Moved. The character will have an accent in their secondary language, probably won't know much slang but will know phrases or expressions. They'll mostly think in their main language, but they can read in their secondary and might even use a word in their secondary rather than a word in their main because it fits better. They'll frequently forget words in their secondary, maybe even specific words. If they forget a word in their main but remember it in their secondary, it's going to be MASSIVLY weird to them. They're going to accidentally use grammar and spelling and expressions from their main in their secondary. In fact, they might still be translating certain words in their head, rather than just speaking. This is the type of bilingual you get when a character moves to a different country, or when a child has been raised by parents in a different language than the one the society around them uses, or similair things. When I was six, I went on a three-week vacation to South-Africa, where everyone around me spoke Afrikaans, and it being quite close to Dutch, I picked up on it easily.

Learnt

Learnt is when you, like it sounds, learn a language. The character will have a terrible accent in their secondary. They'll know phrases, but not expressions, slang or swearwords. Maybe they learnt it to speak to a friend, and if this friend helped them they'll be a little closer to Moved than Learnt, but it'll still be Learnt. This is basically high school senior Spanish level. They're translating everything in their head. In fact, it's debatable wether this even counts as being bilingual. If it's being taught at school, they're probably not good enough for classmates to ask for help with the subject, as opposed to Moved's main and Raised.

Raised

When a character is raised as bilingual, I call it Raised. This happens when a character was raised by two authority figures who speak different languages. Usually it's the parents, but if they spend a lot of time with a babysitter or au-pair that teaches them their language, or a grandparent or teacher or older sibling or maybe even a very good friend (pretty much all my childhood friends improved their English just by being friends with me). They don't have a main and secondary, they don't differentiate; both languages are natural to them. If they're speaking to someone else that know the same languages, they're gonna swap mid-sentence and replace words and fuck with grammar/expressions. My dad once started a sentence saying we should speak Dutch in front of my friend who didn't speak English and ists the sentence ended back in English. Here's a few examples (in Dutch):

"Hey, heb je the table pushed to de kant?" "Table pushed to the kant?" (with sass) "Ja, je snapt what I mean, now doe de damn thing." "whatever."

"Hey weirdo." "Wat mot je?" "Mom wants you to dek the tafel." "Zeg tegen mam dat ze op kan fucken" "I don't feel like bein' yelled at, doe zelf!" "Nahhh you can." "Dat ga ik niet doen. Ga de fucking table dekken." "I'm bezigggg!"

"Yo malloot!" "I'm busy, ga weg." "Jeez, ik ga al... what's up with you, chagerijn?" *rolls eyes in reply*

This style of bilingual is pretty much never seen in media, and certainly not accuratly, because you basically need to be able to speak the languages in order to write it. Common points of turning languages include words that sounds similair with similair meanings (the vs de, hello vs hallo, cool vs koel etc), words that are the same in both languages (Tom, shirt, hey etc), at a break point in a sentence ("You're strong, pak jij de dozen", "You're crazy if you think dat ik je nu weg laat lopen", "Als jij me vasthoudt terwijl ik het pak, then she can fill the gap and we all work together!" etc), or after using a word in the other language because you couldn't find it in the right language in time ("Just go to the zolder, ik heb geen zin in een argument", "Waarom ga jij niet effe de.. uh, grab the butter?"