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of-a-chaotic-mind · 6 months ago

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I Can't Say Part 2

Summary: An Earthquake turns everyone's world upside down and nearly takes part of Eddie's away from him.

TW/CW: Eddie Diaz x Reader, Hurt, Earthquake, Injured Reader, Blood/Blood-loss

Requested?: No

Word Count: 4,136

A/N: Our grand total of words for this trilogy is 11,325... I'm ngl was kinda stuck on how I'd get from break up to make up but then I was rewatching season 2 the other night and well... Earthquake it is. Anyways, hope you enjoy the read! Love to all! Requests are Open!

[ A/N: him so purtty... ]

Part 1

--- Your POV ---

Groaning, I silence my alarm and drag myself to my bedroom to change clothes. I really wish I had changed out of my work clothes last night because it is so uncomfortable to sleep in jeans. I opt for a more comfortable outfit for today since I'm just taking Talia to therapy. My jeans are replaced by sweats, my LAFD t-shirt by an oversized hoodie, and I yank on my high tops to finish it off.

As I make my way to the kitchen for coffee, with a pit stop in the bathroom to brush my teeth, I throw my hair up into a messy bun and check my phone that had miraculously stayed in my back pocket all night. The smell of coffee fills the air as I swipe through notifications which include a few random info dump texts from Buck that I hadn't checked yesterday, a missed call from an unknown number here and there, and a few texts from Tommy checking in on me.

After closing out all the notifications and apps, I find myself staring at my home screen and fidgeting with my bracelet. Glaring back at me is a photo that Buck took in which Chris is sandwiched between me and Eddie as we both hug him. All of us are smiling brightly and my heart hurts at the reminder of my boys. My thoughts are racing when my alarm rings again. I quickly silence it and tuck my phone away before pouring a cup of coffee. As I head out the door, I grab my keys and wallet off the counter.

A good bit later, I'm arriving at Talia's house. I had finally convinced her to let me pick her up if she wants me to drive her to therapy. I shoot her a text to let her know I'm here, forcing myself to ignore my home screen. It only takes a few minutes before she's rushing out of her house and getting in the passenger seat, "Sorry, I woke up a bit late."

I smile, "All good, you should probably brush your hair though," I respond, motioning to the bird's nest atop her head.

As I pull away from the curb, she flips down the visor and giggles at herself in the mirror, "I slept hard last night."

"I can see that," I state, unable to withhold a laugh. Talia has made so much progress in the past week. This is only her second appointment but I can tell a huge difference; she's actually smiling again. She had taken some time off work because she was scared it would either push her over the edge or she wouldn’t be as focused as she needed to be on the job but yesterday, she said she thinks she’ll be ready to get back out there soon.

She grabs my phone from the cupholder, "What kind of music are we feeling today?"

I shrug, "Whatever boats your float."

She erupts into a fit of laughter, "God, I will never stop thanking Tommy for blessing us with that phrase."

I grin as I remember the time a very exhausted, end of shift Tommy responded to the question, "Where do you guys wanna eat?" with, "Whatever boats your float." I'll never forget the look of pure astonishment on his face when he immediately realized what he said and mumbled to himself, "Boats your float? What the fuck?" Talia and I teased him about it for weeks after but it got stuck in my vocabulary and became a regular response for me, causing Talia to giggle and Tommy to roll his eyes every time I say it.

Talia cranks the volume up as she decides on a hip-hop playlist and starts singing along horribly on purpose. This goes on for a little bit, with me giggling at her the whole time, before she finally turns it down, "Alright, what's up with you?"

I tilt my head at her, "What do you mean?"

"I mean not too long ago it was always Eddie this or Christopher that," she pauses, "You haven't mentioned them in like forever and I kind of miss seeing the smile on your face when you'd talk about them." I shrug and train my eyes on the road ahead. She doesn't give up, "Come on, (Y/N). You've let me trauma dump on you for weeks now. If you need to talk, I'll listen."

I take a deep breath, "We broke up."

"What?!" her volume and pitch nearly bursts my eardrums.

I dramatically cover and rub my right ear, "We just decided that it wasn't gonna work out." I hate lying to her but if she knew the real reason she'd blame herself and I don't want to upset her.

"So, it was mutual?" her tone says she doesn't think so. I can't even bring myself to nod. She reaches over and tugs lightly on my bracelet, "I could see keeping the bracelet if it was a mutual break up. That kid means the world to you but-" She picks up my phone and shows me the home screen, "Mutual break ups don't keep photos of their ex as their home screen. People who get dumped do." It's quiet for a couple seconds, "Besides, last time I heard about Eddie, you were asking me if I'd be your Maid of Honor when you guys got married one day. Not if! When."

I internally cringe as the words spill out of my mouth, "Okay, he decided it wasn't gonna work out."

I see the look on her face out of the corner of my eye and she still doesn't buy it, "You mean the man who would fight the entire world for you? The man who would kiss the ground you walk on and bow at your feet? The man who absolutely adores the shit out of you and can never stop staring at you like he can't believe you're real?" I clench my jaw but her phone rings, saving me from having to come up with a response.

A short time later, I am parking on the curb outside her therapist office. She hangs up the phone and grabs my shoulder, "First of all, we're not done talking about it. Second, you should come sit in the waiting room instead of wasting your gas." Praying she won't try to continue the conversation right now, I turn the car off and get out, following her inside.

We ride up to the second floor in the elevator, check her in at the front desk, and take seats in the waiting room before she speaks again, "So, how's Tommy doing? I heard he's got himself a new boyfriend."

I smile and nod, laying my head on the back of my chair, "Yeah, Buck. I work with him at the 118. They're very happy together."

"Oh, that's great! What's Buck like?" she asks. I'm certain she's trying to fill the silence without talking about Eddie.

"If I had to sum him up in one sentence I'd say, there's a reason the team and I call him a golden retriever," I answer and look over at her with a grin.

She laughs, "Oh my god, tell me more."

"Well, he's got a heart of gold and loves his job. He's got tons of energy. He's always got something interesting to talk about because he's constantly researching random shit. One time, he gave me an in-depth explanation of how microwaves work," I pause, "Tommy is absolutely wrapped around his finger. I don't think I've ever seen him smile more than when Buck is info dumping on him."

I sit up, holding my hand up to quiet Talia as she's in the middle of gushing about how adorable that is and how she must meet Buck asap. I stare at the floor beneath us as its small vibrations turn into violent shaking, "Quake!" Everyone in the waiting room ducks for cover. Talia and I slide under a coffee table just as rubble starts falling around us. Quickly covering our heads with our arms, we brace for impact.

When the quake subsides and the dust settles, Talia and I make eye contact as we hear other people panicking. We shove the slab of concrete off the edge of the table and make to get up but instead have to army crawl under another slab of concrete. Keeping my head low, "I sure as hell don't miss this," I grumble, thinking back to my days of army crawling through muddy obstacle courses and sandy war zones.

Behind me, Talia chuckles, "What? Earthquakes or army crawling?"

I pause and look back at her, realizing it has been a while since our last quake, "both," before proceeding cautiously. Our short tunnel opens up into a pocket that is a good bit taller and has more space to maneuver. "Everybody just stay calm. If you're panicking, we can't properly assist you," I announce to those who were blessed by the pocket.

"Please! Please, you have to help her," a young woman cries by the furthest edge from us. She is hunched over another woman whose legs are pinned by a chunk of debris.

"Talia, check everyone else over and get a head count while I try to figure out the safest way to get her out," I instruct.

Behind me, Talia shuffles toward the others, "On it," as I head for the debris.

"Stay with me, Penny," the younger woman begs as Penny groans in pain.

I finally reach them, "Penny, my name is (Y/N). I need you to tell me where it hurts."

"Everywhere," Penny mumbles and I mentally slap myself.

"Okay, yeah. Stupid question, I'm sorry. Can you wiggle your toes?" I respond.

I notice the younger woman's name tag that reads Chelsea as Penny answers, "Yeah I think so."

"Alright, that's a good sign. Chelsea, I need you to see if you can find a piece of wood or something that is big enough for her to lay on," Chelsea nods and begrudgingly leaves to scavenge.

I drop to my stomach and scoot closer to Penny, "We're gonna get you outta here, I'm just a little more limited on resources than usual." I take her hand in mine and drop my forehead to the floor with a thump. My head is pounding; I think I hit it on the underside of the coffee table earlier. I'm having a hard time thinking straight.

I remember Bobby's advice for times like this, "Don't worry about the things that you can't do anything about. Focus on one task at a time." Alright, first task, get Penny free and on a makeshift back board.

I check her pulse, it's weak but steady, "Penny, I need you to focus on your breathing, okay?" She nods, taking deep breaths, as I look up at the debris that is pinning her. It looks like a thick and heavy wall but doesn't appear to be supporting anything. I crawl to where her legs disappear out of sight and stick my hand under as far as I can reach, feeling for any bleeding and thankfully finding none. I crane my neck to look at the others, a few are assisting where they can as Talia checks everyone over. "I need as many hands as I can get over here!" I yell across what remains of the waiting room.

Talia stops what she's doing and points to few men who look to be in pretty good shape considering the circumstances. She directs them to me before squeezing a little girl's hand tightly and joining me herself. As they approach, Chelsea comes hobbling around a corner with a piece of wood.

When everyone is there and ready for instructions, I start dishing them out, "You guys," I point to the men, "spread out around this wall and get ready to lift." I roll over on my back and scoot until my shoulders are even with the edge of the collapsed wall, "Talia, Chelsea, as soon as this wall is up enough, pull her out as gently as you can and get her on the wood." Once everyone is in position, "On the count of three. 1... 2... 3..." I push as hard as I can against the underside of the wall. The men help lift from their positions and soon they've pulled Penny out.

"You get out from under there, we got this," one of the men insists.

I nod and roll back over on my stomach to shove myself up to my feet and away from the wall, "Let it down easy." They do and now I'm left trying to figure out my next task. I scan the pocket looking for any possible exits. A pile of rubble blocks the door to what I hope is still a somewhat functioning stairwell. It will take some time to clear the way enough to get the door open but it's our only shot. I notice the massive receptionist desk is still somehow standing making a decent place for everyone to take cover for the inevitable aftershocks.

"Talia, help everyone get under the reception desk," I look at the men who are patiently waiting for further instruction, "You guys are gonna help me get that door open," I punctuate my sentence with a point at the door. They nod and immediately head that way, as do I. Behind me I hear Talia start instructing the others. Once everyone is under the desk, Talia joins us in the small bit of headway we're making.

--- Third Person POV ---

The 118 is heading toward a downtown building collapse. Despite knowing it's futile, they've all tried contacting various loved ones. Buck sighs in relief as he hears Tommy's voice on the radio, "This is 127 Pilot Kinard. 118 please check in."

Immediately, Buck grabs his radio, "Buckley checking in. Nash, Diaz, Wilson, Han, and Panikkar all accounted for."

It's quiet for a split second before Tommy asks, "(Y/L/N)?" Buck hesitates, looking over at Eddie who has been staring out the window ever since he gave up on trying to reach Chris and (Y/N).

Voice shaky, Buck answers, "No contact. She's off duty."

Tommy's voice sounds strained, "Copy. Y'all stay safe."

Buck responds, trying to sound reassuring, "We will."

As they near the building, Eddie nearly slams his head against the window as he looks back behind them. "Woah, what?" Hen asks across from him, startled by his sudden movement.

Eddie whips his head around to look at his team just as the engine parks next to another one from the 133, "That was (Y/N)'s car!" He flings his headset off and scrambles out of the vehicle as everyone else piles out behind him.

Buck catches up to him and grabs his shoulder when he stops in front of a crushed car, "A-are you sure? She's doesn't exactly have a unique car..." Eddie only points at the shattered windshield. As he spins and takes off toward Bobby, Buck looks to where he pointed to find the rubber duck wearing firefighter gear that he and Tommy had helped Chris buy for (Y/N) on her last birthday. Chris had insisted the duck needed a cowboy hat so they also bought a small Toy Story Woody action figure. Woody himself was sitting at home on one of Buck's bookshelves but his hat now laid beside the little duck in the pancake that was formerly a car.

--- Your POV ---

I wipe the sweat and dust off my face as I hoist another chunk of debris to the new pile we've made. We've made a decent size dent in the blockage but it's still not enough to get through. As the ground begins to tremble again, Talia yells, "Aftershock!"

I turn and attempt to make it to the desk with everyone else but a bout of dizziness takes me down. I feel a blinding pain as something punctures my lower back close to my left hip. I look back to see a piece of rebar sticking out. When everything stops shaking, Talia rushes over to me. I try to get up but the rebar has me staked to the floor. She presses her hands against my blood-soaked hoodie, "(Y/N) you better stay with me!" I try hard to focus on my breathing as she yells at the men to keep working on the blockage and calls Chelsea over to her, "I need you to keep pressure around this, okay?"

Talia drops to her stomach, face to face with me, "How bad is it? Be honest."

I wiggle my toes and reach around to feel exactly where the puncture is, "Shouldn't be too bad. Main concern is the bleeding. Thank god for love handles because I think that's all it hit."

She nods, "Alright, hang in there."

Talia returns back to Chelsea who whispers, "She's losing a lot of blood." I hear fabric tear and feel my hoodie lift up. I'm sure Talia is trying to stem the blood flow as much as possible by sandwiching fabric between my hoodie and skin. I lay my clammy cheek against the cool floor and look out at the wreckage. It's starting to get hard to breathe and my vision is already blurry.

--- Third Person POV ---

Just as Talia finishes packing fabric around the rebar in her friend's abdomen, another aftershock hits. The others rush to the desk and Talia tries to move to cover (Y/N)'s body as much as possible but one of the men pulls her away, "You can't save her if you take a chunk of concrete to the dome."

Talia screams, "(Y/N) don't you dare leave me! Stay awake, okay?!"

As soon as the shaking dies down enough, Talia rushes back to (Y/N), who is now losing even more blood, and adjusts the fabric to accommodate what is now a bigger hole. "(Y/N), you still with me?!" she screams, panic is evident in her tone. She looks over to see that her friend is unconscious, blood trickling down her forehead.

Chelsea joins her, tearing off a piece of her shirt and pressing it to the gash near (Y/N)'s hairline, "She's still breathing but barely."

Talia nods, finishing with the pile of fabric, "Swap with me." The two swap places before Talia shakes (Y/N) gently. She softly smacks her cheeks, "(Y/N) you gotta wake up! Please..." Tears flow freely down her own cheeks now as she looks up at the ceiling, "God you wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for me..."

As she continues her attempts to wake (Y/N), one of the men shushes everyone, "I think I hear something," he announces, pressing his ear to the little bit of the door they had uncovered. "It's voices!" he cheers, "Help is here!" The room erupts into excitement as the man bangs on the door, "In here! Hey! We're in here!"

On the other side of the door, the 118 team hears the banging and rushes up the stairs as carefully as they can. Bobby yells, "We hear you! This is Captain Nash with LAFD. How many of you are there?"

From (Y/N)'s side, Talia whips her head up and yells back, "10! Firefighter down! One of yours!"

Panic blankets the team and Bobby has to grab a hold of Eddie to keep him from busting the door down, "We don't know what's on the other side of that door," Buck places a hand on Eddie's shoulder so Bobby can turn back to the door and find out what they're dealing with.

The man answers Bobby, "A pile of rubble! We've been trying to clear it because (Y/N) said this stairwell is our best bet on getting out."

Eddie's heart leaps into his throat at the confirmation that it's her. Buck's grip tightens, warning him to calm down. Bobby instructs, "Okay, I need everyone to get away from the door. We're gonna have to saw our way in."

The man looks down at (Y/N) and Talia, "We can't move (Y/N), she's staked to the floor by rebar. I think if I try to pull Talia away from her again, she might murder me." Buck's ears perk up at the mention of Talia. Maybe Tommy was onto something there. He shoves those thoughts aside as Bobby asks for the saw in his hands.

"Alright, the rest of you back away. Talia, do your best to shield her," Bobby responds, "Let us know when we're clear."

In the room, everyone puts plenty of distance between them and the door as Talia covers (Y/N)'s body the best she can, "Clear!"

Buck drags Eddie away as he and the team back up to give space. Bobby cuts a large enough hole in the door before handing the saw to Chimney, "Buck, help me with this." Together Bobby and Buck remove the metal chunk and as soon as he has a clear shot, Eddie rushes through the hole. Hen is right on his heels, med bag in hand, as Talia moves away from (Y/N) to let them work.

Bobby, Buck, Chimney, and Ravi set to work helping the others out of the building as Hen grabs Eddie's frantic hands, "You need to calm down, Eddie."

He takes a deep breath before placing two fingers on (Y/N)'s wrist, "Pulse is steady but dangerously weak." The two medics set to work doing their best to stabilize her. When Buck and Bobby join them, she has an oxygen mask on, IV line in, a pulse/ox monitor on her finger, and Hen is keeping pressure around the wound.

"What do we got?" Bobby asks firmly as he crouches beside Eddie, placing his hand on the distraught man's shoulder. Eddie can only stare down at her, repeatedly brushing her hair out of her face as he silently begs her to wake up.

Hen answers, "Vitals are steady but in the danger zone. She's lost a lot of blood. Rebar isn't too close to any vital organs but it went all the way through and into the floor."

Bobby nods, "We transport her with the rebar. Eddie, lift her up as gently as you can. Buck, hand me the bolt cutters and lift on the other side. Hen, keep pressure on that wound and an eye on her vitals." Everyone nods as Chimney and Ravi return from helping the last of the others out with a back board. On the count of three Eddie and Buck lift (Y/N) up enough that Bobby can cut the rebar underneath her. Once they've rolled her onto back, Hen quickly sets to work dressing the untouched side. In minutes, they're lifting her onto the back board and headed out of the building.

As they approach the scene commander, Bobby states, "We need an ambulance now."

The commander nods recognizing (Y/N), "We've got more on the way take the 133's." Bobby leads the way toward the 133 ambulance. Behind them, the commander yells, “I still need hands on deck, Nash.”

As Hen and Chimney load (Y/N) into the back, Bobby looks at them all, “I know we’re all worried about her. One driver and Eddie can go. Everyone else needs to stay here.” Talia takes a few steps back from the group as Eddie climbs into the back and Hen heads to the front. She looks up at the collapsing building and around at the firefighters and paramedics rushing around near them.

She looks back toward the ambulance as Bobby calls her name and holds his hand out to help her into the back. She’s still nervous about getting back out there right now but she knows she can be of more help here than at the hospital blaming herself for (Y/N)’s injury. She steps up beside him, ignoring his hand, “Got an extra turn out?”

Before Bobby can ask if she’s sure, Tommy runs up to them already wearing turn out gear and carrying an extra, “Heard you guys are down by two.” He sees (Y/N) in the back of the ambulance and he feels a touch of anger in the worry that settles in his chest as Eddie frets over her vitals. Bobby shuts the doors of the ambulance and gives it a few knocks before it pulls away.

He turns to Tommy, “Shouldn’t you be in a helicopter?”

“Commander radioed for extra hands and I’ve been grounded. Our station got hit pretty hard and took my ride down with it,” Tommy answers. He turns to Talia, offering her the extra gear that she can see her last name written on, “I had a hunch you’d be here so I grabbed your old gear before I left.” She takes it and quickly puts it on, looking to Bobby for orders.

Part 3

More 911

Main Masterlist

#911 #911 show #911 imagine #911 imagines #eddie diaz #eddie diaz x reader #eddie diaz imagine #eddie diaz imagines #y/n #eddie diaz x y/n #hurt #injury #injured reader #earthquake #blood #blood loss

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msookyspooky · 1 year ago

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♡ Obsessed Delusional Reader x Sinclair Brother's ♡

Bo Sinclair:

- "Wow, so you want me that bad, huh? 🤭😏 You tied me up because you want to keep me here? That's so romantic! 😍 And out of everyone in my group it was me?"

- Bo is staring at you, trying to scare you and even hurt you but...The drive isn't there with you being so...Willing? Like, there's no fun in this you lil nutjob!

- Match made in hell

- "Are you there? Is your head just decoration or somethin'? What the fuck is your problem?? I am CRAZY and EVIL and will FUCK YOU UP." You: "Okay bby, if you say so. 🥰" All while Bo is short circuiting.

- Alright, that's it. You're getting the glue on your mouth.

- Honestly about to cut something off to make you afraid or hurt...He might but also might not because you fascinate him so are you a person that fascinates him or a toy he needs to break?

- The bondage sex is probably banging though ngl he's even a bit enthralled by how eager you are compared to most victims

- When you are still not afraid and looking at him in a way that melts most hearts even his icy one he can't even truly torture you properly. Most victims he can shut that off because they trigger his sadism by screaming and fighting or cussing him out or begging him but all these years he's never had a victim act so lovey dovey even after finding out his darkest secrets

- At first this has him so frustrated he has to leave the gas station room; having a crisis cause this has never happened before!

- Doesn't trust you but decided to undo the mouth glue or tape and untie you after all the fun to see what you would do...When you follow him around like a love sick puppy he's both annoyed yet enjoys it

- Mad lil unloved boy in a man's body that is both flustered and irritated at his captive being so fucking smitten for him without manipulation on his part. He has to be in control and your feelings for him is out of his control and he hates it.

- "...What the fuck" -Bo after finding you drawing his name with hearts in a notebook and planning your wedding and future with your captor while your chained up in his bedroom instead of the gas station room bc he obviously is in love with you to move you to someplace more comfy; how sweet of him ♡

- You are dead ass scarying him.

- He should kill you but he thinks you're so crazy he's kinda nervous if he misses with his shotgun and what you'll do if he does because you so obsessed with him is a level of coocoo he ain't never had before

- Once you start to show dimension other than flirting with him (Bonus points if you have trauma like he does and it's why you're lovebombing him and so attached) he starts to look at you as less a pest and more a clingy pet.

- Like...You really just have that much of a crush on him after everything he's done? You both can trauma bond and lovebomb each other? (And manipulate even if he's too dumb to realize you're manipulating him too to love you)

- Is actually willing to be crazy with you after awhile and have you obsessed with him because why not? It gets lonely in Ambrose and he likes you as a pet at times. He'd put a ring on your finger as his spouse just to shut you up, claim you like someone claims their chair, and as an act to lure victims

- If you get extremely possesive and jealous and refuse him having anyone strapped in that chair in that room but you; he actually is so flattered you're that possesive of him. Like he secretly always craved a person making him theirs like this PLUS you know his dark side and still want him.

- He'd probably ease up on being so mean and try acting like a crazy possesive delusional married couple together after that even if he still treats you as a thing to easily manipulate and control and he's CLEARLY not being manipulated either (Poor dumb bastard.)

- Vincent is internally screaming and questioning why this person is in their house and has a wedding band from a victim on their finger and his brother is...Being sweet on them??? Lester is happy for you though.

Vincent Sinclair:

- "Wow...I'm your muse? 🥺💘 That's so swee-" *Paralyzing agent kicks in but you have heart eyes still*

- He literally cannot work with you looking at him like that. Stop. He can't even wax your brows off because you're looking at him in a way no one has before

- You weren't even afraid and it makes him hesitate because...He forgot his tools upstairs! Obviously...He'll try again later.

- Once the agent wears off and your spared for now it's ten times worse

- He is blushing so bad under his mask at all your praise and admiring his work and admiring him you're gonna melt his damn mask!

- He is harder to get through to than his twin (HC Bo is more desperate for affection as the least favorite bad seed unloved child than he let's on he just acts cold but they both crave acceptance)

- Vincent pats your head like Jonesy the dog when you smile at him while he works...You're not so bad. As long as you stay outta the way.

- May have to pick you up and move you where he wants like furniture sorry his people skills kinda suck being sheltered for his face then stuck in abandoned Ambrose half his life

- Bo acts annoyed with your obsessed ways but secretly enjoys the neediness for him. Vince is actually annoyed being much more reclusive than Bo and now you're staring at him while he works.

- Dead stares at you when you sculpt tiny little figures of you both holding hands with wax he let you have...He loves it or else he'd destroy it obviously ♡♡♡

- When he lost his mask and you fawned over him (He acted like Erik in Phantom of the Opera the DRAMATICS) he's absolutely panicking and startled

- Once you kiss that side of his face and praise him maskless how on Earth could he not fall for you too despite your odd ways??

- Becomes just as obsessed with you only in a more lowkey way than you. Making sculptures and drawing you all the time. Enjoys you talking, keeping him company etc.

- Bo is bewildered when you verbal rip his ass so viciously when he made a nasty remark to your angel bby his twin brother that this big guy was reeling back thinking you were gonna jump him. Probably said shit that he'll be secretly thinking about tonight with a heavy heart too. Vincent snickers and pulls his guard dog away as you glare at Bo the entire way back downstairs.

- You and Bo do not get along because of how protective you are of Vince and how mean Bo can be

Lester Sinclair:

- "Oooo, you got such a big hunting knife! Is it in reference to...Other big things?🤭😘"

- HUH!?

- His brain shut off because he had never had a victim he took to his brothers flirt with him like this. And while he's covered in grime and roadkill?!

- It's okay it just adds to his manliness. We love a man with hobbies! ♡

- Like...Are you being mean and joking? Are you...Alright up there in your noggin? He would take the long way and other roads to Ambrose just to talk to you more and figure you out (Even when Bo is in a hot ass suit in a Church with no air waiting and is ringing Lester's cell off the hook)

- When you are fascinated by what he does, praising his job, asking about him; he is a blushing mess driving. Then he tries flirting back and cracks his cheesy jokes. And when you laugh??? Ooooh it's over. He's crushing severely.

- Easiest brother to woe. He's keeping you. Gonna show up to the house like Spencer in that one episode of ICarly.

Bo: "...What is that?"

Lester drinking a smoothie while you cheerfully wave love struck on his arm: "A smoothie??"

- He did question your mental state at first but hell he grew up with Bo and Vince so what the hell? He's a lil crazy too! Just part of your charm is all.

- When you are talking about the future he gets a little nervous but not out right opposing it just give him some time, babe! He could give you a ring made of deer antler or bone wittled down and you'd cry and say yes.

- He acts cute with you. You both are so disgustingly sweet on each other it makes Bo gag and Vincent roll his eye whenever you both come to town.

- Both twins are so jealous their goofy dirty lil brother found love before them and they can't stand it

#house of wax bo sinclair #house of wax (2005)#house of wax 2005 #house of wax imagine #house of wax #house of wax vincent sinclair #house of wax lester #house of wax imagines

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a-romantics-guide-to-life · 5 months ago

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⋆ ₊☽˚𝓵𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓭 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓵𝓮𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓼˚☾₊ ⋆

𝓼𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂 : you and coryo had gone through hell and back, you've been together and far apart yet you could never find the courage to say how you truly feel for him. so, you wrote them into letter form, but you never sent them. and so what happens when one mr. snow finds each and every letter only to realize that it's too late?

𝓽𝓻𝓲𝓰𝓰𝓮𝓻 𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 : written in letter form from the readers perspective, talks of jealousy and sad feelings, r is definitely from the capitol, self blame, kinda sorta depression, angst, deceit, suicide, coryo finally responds

𝓪/𝓷 : so here’s part three!! I’m ngl I cried writing this and I KNOW people were asking for a happy ending but I’m just gonna tell y’all now that this is angst NO/VERY LITTLE COMFORT! I just had to do it so here ya go! enjoy 😊!

𝓹𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽 | 𝓷𝓮𝔁𝓽 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽

⋆ ₊ ☽ ·˚𓍲⋆ 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮: 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓭𝓮𝓯𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓮𝓭 ⋆𓍲˚· ☾ ₊ ⋆ Dear Coriolanus,

Time ticks on and on as does life; but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt and it certainly doesn't mean that pain fades away with each passing day.

I heard from Mrs.Plinth that Sejanus was killed out in the districts. It must be so saddening knowing that your young son who had his whole life ahead of him died out in the districts all by himself.

I wonder if you saw him die, what were his last words?

Mrs.Plinth didn’t share much only saying that it was out in the districts and that she was very grateful that you were there for him.

Yet it also hurts knowing that you upended the trajectory of your life all for Lucy Gray.

What could she give you that I couldn’t?

People experience pain in such different ways. I remember when you got a cut when we were climbing trees in my backyard and you were stone faced acting like you were okay when I knew you weren’t. You hate blood and you especially hate pain and I know that.

All of us do really, I too was only eight when the war ended. We all went through the pain of hunger every single day, some even committed heinous acts to survive that will haunt them forever.

Some cower in terror and pain yet some rise above the pain. Some use that pain and anguish as a motivator to push forward and persevere.

Like you.

You know me, the runt of the litter. The forgotten one. Yet not by you, I know you would never forget me.

Just like I’ll never forget you.

Which is why it hurts so much to know that you still chose Lucy Gray over me. It still kills me when I think about my best friend, my first and forever love, who I’ve been through so much with choose a girl he’s just met over someone who's been on your side since day one.

What did I do wrong? Was it something I said? What could she have that I don’t?

Life has quieted down I guess, school is the same old same old, just the same boring day one after another. The Capitol just seems so dreary and dull, there is constant gloom plaguing the sky.

I like to think it’s because you’re not here. My sun, my moon illuminating the dark dark sky, shining brightly amongst the stars that have long burned out.

I really do miss you Coryo,

Yours Truly

Coriolanus,

I heard from Tigiris you’re finally on your way home.

Is Lucy Gray with you?

I wonder if she’s holding your hand at the very second, comforting you about coming back to the home you call hell. Have you told her about your life in the Capitol, I wonder?

Is she truly your home now, Coriolanus?

It seems everyone around me is finding what their lives were missing. Money, power, glory. Yet there is this hole in my heart and my life in the shape of you.

I will never find home.

Many people say that home is where the heart is or that home is a person or idea rather than a physical place and they’re right.

Because my home will forever be you, Coriolanus.

And it rips my chest apart to know that I will never be able to go home because a pretty little bird has decided to peck her way into my home and build a fragile little nest. It hurts even more to know that you protected that nest.

Are there little birdies tweeting in that nest now?

I wonder if you have Sejanus’ stuff. You really were that boy's best friend, you know that Coriolanus?

Just like how you were my best friend. Before the war, before Celmensia, before Sejanus, before Lucy Gray.

But hey, you’re finally on the way back to the Capitol, right?

You’re finally coming back home to me.

I truly do hope I am the first one you call.

Love,

Your Darling awaiting your call

To Coriolanus Snow,

My grave has been long set for I dug it. I have made my bed now, I must lie in it.

By the time you read this I will have already been long dead. The ache in my chest drove me to it, the numbing hole that consumed my being was no longer tolerable.

My head was drowning in anger, sadness, love. All for you my dearest Coriolanus.

I find myself writing as if there is tomorrow yet I truly do know that there won’t be a future for me.

I’ve reread every single unsent letter I have written for you and the gaping hole in my chest grows larger with every word I read for I know deep in my soul that I will never be able to go back in time and tell myself that it’s all worth it because I’m ow that it isn’t.

It’s ruining my life, Coriolanus, please do not think less of me for it.

My body has been battered and bruised all my by my hand, my mind plaguing my sanity, my memories, with fields of death and despair. I find now that I find solace and comfort in the thought.

I have dropped out of school, not that anyone would have noticed. I stopped sketching too, you know. It’s just that whenever my pencil touches the page all my hand seems to be able to draw is your face. My sketchbook has been filled with sketches of your face, your eyes, you at that reaping ceremony, you when you went to visit Lucy Gray in the Capitol zoo. All you.

I cant take it anymore Coryo, my heart can’t take it anymore.

My mind is plagued with images of your beautiful face, your smug smiles, your laughs where you hide those gorgeous hydrangea blue eyes of yours, the look on your face when I hugged you for the last time.

I replay that moment in my head, constantly. I seemingly can’t stop thinking back on that moment and think about what I could have said or could have given you to make you stay.

I would have done anything to have you stay, to have you be mine.

To have you love me back.

It’s a fickle thing, love. Fragile, yet powerful. It can make one go mad yet it can also ground you. It can drive you to murder for someone yet it can also motivate you to step in front of a bullet for someone.

It can also motivate you to live or cause you to die.

Some find love a nessecity to live while some find it the reason for their demise.

My dearest Coriolanus, I’m so terribly sorry. Yet I cannot help but akin love to a hardship. A pain, a pain that no matter how many dates I go on or how many men I flirt with that this pain will not go away.

I really tried, Coryo, I really did. I tried so hard to move on, to love someone else even when I know a hole is where my heart is and you and only you hold that missing piece.

I love you Coriolanus Snow.

I love you Coryo.

I love you.

I’ve loved you every minute of every single day of every single month of every single year ever since we were young. It may have been youthful play love but it shifted as the moons do.

I love you in every memory, every letter, and every dream that we meet. I love you in every minute and my love will forever live on in the velvety petals of pure white roses and pillowy hydrangeas.

I’ll love you, no matter what, every day, every hour, every minute, every year, for the rest of my life.

I’ll forever love you, even when I’m no longer here.

I forgive you my love, forever and always.

My only hope that you’ll forgive me.

My last wish is that you finally receive all those letters I wrote to you as a naive and young girl and look back that even now, I’m still me.

I’ll love you forever,

Your Dearest Darling Dead

tagging! @lonely-dreamer

thanks so much for the support and love on this series, it really does mean a lot to me and I hope to see you on the epilogue!

#coriolanus snow #coryo snow #coriolanus x reader #tom blyth #tom blyth x reader #letters #the hunger games #tbosas #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #thg #emi sanity

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vampirevatican · 2 months ago

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just finished slash fic... so now i have to wait til next saturday and set aside 200$... or keep logging in til i have 16k shards. for now let me just ramble and rant

SPOILERS FOR SLASH FIC BELOW (DORIAN VN)

EP 1-5:

so we're with our bestie, a theatre gay, an alt boy and a white, blue-eyed, blonde cancelled tiktok star... yeah this is a modern day horror.

riley really pissed me off... every time she was on screen she irritated me

she reads the incantation? "dumbass... WAIT WHY TF YOU PULLING ME INTO THIS?"

she calls me frumpy? "bitch i'm the only thing keeping you alive, you better bow tf down."

damien? god i love him. it's the aesthetic and his blush and as the game goes on i continue to love him.

the slashers?

mike saying "mine." hard. leather lifting me like a sack of potatoes? hard.

jay being adorable? "who's a sweet boy!!" ghost... was annoying to me he did not have me in the first half

actually no. ghost continued to piss me off... til the projector room. and it wasn't the smut. it was him taking down bitchy sorority girls hazing their latest member

that was the begining of the shift to lovers in enemies to lovers

leather... i... the way he relies on us and getting to spend time in his farm? no yeah i definitely fell in love. that's my husband.

oh jay. i just wanted to hold him and tell him he deserves so much more and so much better

damien can get hurt!? nooooo!!! i went back and saved him tho and... there's a small moment you share abt him crushing around here in the next batch of episodes and i... bb pls i love you

mike. he scares me. he... horraouses me. being and eldritch's plaything is... idk.

EP 6-10

I FUCKIN KNEW IT!!!

as soon as the talk of subverting tropes entered the chat i just knew it was that basic ass popular bitch

be damned if she's got a witch bloodline. her ass doesn't deserve that title!! and hell i don't think her mother (or jay's... different story, later) deserve witch status either!!

this section is also where my brain connected dots and started to like ghost more

ghost is stu macher... i like stu... so now, i like ghost.

protection, belonging, bashful, control... it's how i knew which of these belonged to which, yet what i mixed up was ghost and jay but after seeing it... yeah no i started to pity ghost and like him even more

EP 11-15

RIIIIILEEEEEEY!!!!

can i say a bad word?? CAN I SAY A BAD WORD!!!? YOU MOTHERFUCKING BITCH @ RILEY

i hate her. and there's NOTHING this story can do to make me want her or pity her

"you witches play with darkness then act surprised when it plays back" uh huh papa, that's exactly what this dumb bitch does

love the team work boys, really... but not now

"am i just a protector? just muscle to stand between you and a blade?" no!! you're so much more...

FREDDIE KRUGER?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE??

ngl the halloween special with jay walking out the fire... is where my concept of a mc counselor that loves fire comes from... and the darkness taking over

darkness taking over?! getting to do wild shit? being mean, nasty, murderous??? sign me up tht shit is just brewing beneath the surface. oh... mc isn't, damn.

"this isn't you" jokes on you! it kinda is. ngl if the darkness hit me and i was fighting it off id have my ways on my own but i guarantee it'd be the catalyst to me becoming a killer

i got a glitch and got to see mike... do things and just gotta say cnc, knife play smut fic will happen.

EP 16-20

more ghost! and oh... oh he can get mad and it's hot...

and oh no... he's sad... he's cute when he's sad

the hearts start to piss me off from here on out. i could handle missing out on smut. but comforting my boys?? missing out on lore??? fuck you (i say, becoming the fuck you girl)

i was able to get everyone's unmasking (reluctantly getting mike's with a spend of hearts that i was trying to glitch) but ghosts and then i get it later but can't even go back and watch it w/o fucking up my progress... fuck you (i am the fuck you girl)

ANYWAY on to leather

i love you bubba, i love you papa, leather is so important to me after this one

his family is shit and he shouldn't have been lied to by his bs siblings

there's a spice scene w/ ofc heart option but it leads like free spice til you get the option ("fuck you", im telling you guys i hate the pay walls)

anyhow the lead up spice actually varies the way you say you wanna get down with the guys!! and turns out leather and jay get along rly good

fuck pilgrims btw.

EP 21-25

jay... oh jay... (losing dogs by miski plays while i start crying)

fuck jay's mom, fuck the dunlaps (prt 1), fuck cultists

jay deserves better and im glad that we get to help him in the end but FOR FUCKS SAKE IM MISSING OUT ON MOMENTS!!!

i wanted to comfort him, hell i wanted to comfort leather and ghost in the previous chapters too and yet PAYWALL

anyway speaking of my second irritation with the paywall, i accept smut pay wall but you can't no- shouldn't have the story read like we about to get freaky and it's in his hands and then strip it away!!! especially not jay!! give the option before hand!!!

anyway... the way he's like “i want you to run. run as fast as you can, and im gonna catch you. and when i do... your cookie is mine.”

the way i folded?? rock hard. down horrendous. i want him. no i need him.

anyway then he protects you and you stand up for him (reverse order) and if you get points you see his face and... i...

my baby. my baby...

he's so damn cute!!! he's such a sweetheart. he didn't deserve none of what happened to him!!!

okay now mike.... (loosing dogs starts playing again, specifically the 'oooooo')

i... he didn't deserve what happened with him either and im so glad he can actually really speak more after this.

turns out he wasn't an eldritch evil, but rather possessed by it, forced to do its bidding, born alongside it

FINALLY WE'RE FREE OF RILEY, THANK GOD DAMIEN IS OKAY

wait a minute... DAMIEN IS THAT YOU?? if so... i uh... you can join the harem w/o playing slasher pookie.

and who tf is this counselor?!

EP 26 and 27

so turns out the dilf/milf counselor got possessed to be krampus...

yeah no shit is getting hilarious levels of ridiculous but if this is what it takes for a special sure.

honestly the halloween and christmas could've been separated, like side stories?? spin offs?? ah well.

the guys fuck each other... I REPEAT

damien getting jelly? oh bb all you gotta do is say the word, i promise ilu. you're in the harem too!! if i had 1❤️ option or a freebie id take it every time.

“they hate each other. but they also f🐬CK each other!!”

apparently mike will watch jay, and ghost and leather get freaky sometimes... it may be bc unbearable darkness horny but idc, they fuck each other in the void!!!

#.⁠｡⁠*⁠chitchat💭━♡#dorian slashfic #this is my new fandom #and yes i am obsessed.

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starrysvn · 2 years ago

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married in vegas | choi san

pairing: choi san x gn!reader genre: exes2lovers synopsis: choi san had been your first true love and who you'd hoped would be your last. but things don't always work out. too bad your friends were his too, and jung wooyoung was hellbent on spending a long weekend birthday trip in las vegas. never mind your poor heart. warnings: drinking, swear words, a lil angst, dramatics, fluff, unedited word count: 5.2k author's note: fourth installment is here! hope you like this one, i recently rewatched that one episode of friends (iykyk) and just thought i'd put the final dialogue from it in here, kinda. ngl i feel like on the whole i could've done better but i hope you'll enjoy your read anyway! :3

series masterlist | regular masterlist

The breakup was amicable. You stayed friends and, sure, you didn’t hang out as much as you used to - for obvious reasons - and, yes, you did try to get out of any gathering that you knew he was going to be at. Still, you were civil. You could be in his presence.

And yet, all of that didn’t explain why the mere mention of him joining his best friend’s birthday trip to Las Vegas, had you circling around the room like a madman.

“I hope you’re fucking joking” you whine through the phone, earning a sigh from Yeosang.

“You’re blowing this way out of proportion”

“Am I?”

After talking your best friend’s ear off for minutes on end, that sounded wrong to your own ears.

“How did you not realize? San is Wooyoung’s best friend, of course he’d be there!” he reasons, as if you need a reminder that you are being ridiculous. “Plus, he’s taking a huge leap of faith in inviting you both”

“Listen, it was months ago, he didn’t use the group chat to invite us, I didn’t put two and two together. I had a lot on my plate! And hey, we’re civil!” The silence that meets you is so loud. You sigh. “Sorry for the dramatics, it’s been a long day”

After all, you are still recovering from having to dash home in a downpour. And having to stay after hours to have a long, unnecessary meeting with your head of department. Realizing your ex-boyfriend would also be joining your long weekend getaway was just the cherry on top.

“I’d say sorry for springing this up on you at the last minute, but then again, I could’ve just waited to see your face tomorrow” you hit him back with a real funny, Sang, smiling when you hear him snort. The line goes quiet for a second. “Do you want me to come over? We can head to the airport together in the morning” Yeosang says softly, a silent peace offering.

“Are you kidding? Have you seen the weather?” you look out the window, the rain’s still unforgivingly pouring down.

“Unlike you, I don’t refuse to drive in dire conditions” he pokes fun.

“You’re on thin fucking ice, Kang Yeosang”

“I’ll be over in ten” you could basically see his amused grin. You let out a chuckle hanging up. Then you press a hand to your forehead, trying to soothe the headache starting to form.

Choi San is the boyfriend. The one you never thought would leave. The one parting from hurt like nothing you ever experienced. The one you eventually bounced back from, but did you really? Because it still feels as if he was a part of you, just as much as you are a part of him. And when he left, you had to re-learn how to go through life with a missing piece.

He’d been your best friend, the person you ran to for everything. Someone you loved so much that it scared you sometimes because you knew just how much it would kill you to lose him.

Choi San is the one that got away and took a piece of you with him.

But what could you do, after months of healing and avoiding him, when your friends were his friends too? Declining invitations got old fast. The first time you saw him again, you thought you could handle his presence for the night. And you did but cried the whole way home. After that, no more. With time, it got better. Seeing him no longer left you with a sinking feeling. Of course, it isn’t like before, but it never could be, and you made your peace with that.

Still, after one year, you microdose on San, afraid of what could happen to your heart if you spent too much time close to him. It’s for your own sake, your peace of mind. That’s why, when it finally clicked into place that you’d be spending a whopping four days in his presence, you flipped.

The doorbell pulls you from your thoughts, and a smiley Yeosang holding a bottle of wine greets you. You should have known better than to accept alcohol as a peace offering from your best friend. Most of all, you should know that it never really ends with just one bottle. Because now you are incredibly hungover, severely nauseous and totally late for your flight.

“This is all your fault” you hiss as Yeosang asks the Uber driver to please hurry. Both your phones are annoyingly dinging with unread text messages, not helping your headache at all.

“Excuse you?” he turns around, tone accusatory. “As far as I remember, you were the one who brought out the tequila”

“Well, you didn’t stop me”

“You were crying!”

“Even worse!”

Your bickering is brought to an end by the screeching halt of the car in front of the airport. You ignore the severe wave of nausea it causes and get out, Yeosang right in tow. Incessant teasing and half-hearted blame tossing accompanies your run through the airport.

With just five minutes to spare, Wooyoung’s screeching hyena laughter welcomes the two of you at the gate. Surely the matching sunglasses and coats thrown over your pyjamas are a sight to behold, you think as you hug your friends hello.

“Birthday boy!” you pull Wooyoung into a big hug, giggling when he sways you both back and forth.

“Thank you for coming” he already said that months ago, when he first proposed the idea, but right now - with San’s eyes on you - the sincerity in Wooyoung’s somehow shines brighter.

“Thank you for having me” you smile genuinely. The breakup put a strain on your group of friends for a little, and you wanted to make sure he knew how much you appreciated him wanting you here. He squeezes your hand, before moving to Yeosang.

“We need to go, you’ll say hi in eleven hours when we land. Chop, chop!” Seonghwa rushes everyone to join the last few people in line. You let go of Mingi, laughing, hearing Yunho say something along the lines of they literally just started boarding, and follow the rest. You finish saying your hellos through boarding, finally facing San.

As you always do when it comes to him, you push down whatever mixed feelings bubbled up in your chest and put on a smile.

“Hi, San," you wave, so you're stunned when he just spares you a quick side hug, smiling curtly after greeting you.

Your friends had long stopped holding their breath whenever you two are in the same room, but this feels off. Like a splash of cold water, it sends you back to the first, awkward time you met up again. Nobody seems to notice though, apart from Yeosang. Unlike the rest of your friends, his gaze still lingers on you carefully. You subtly nod at him, like you always do.

Sighing, you keep walking beside your best friend, not really able to shake the disappointment San’s cold greeting leaves you with. Despite your best efforts, you let it eat away at you during the flight, the car ride to the hotel and the moments you unpack. No amount of berating does it. Why would he behave like that? Is this all in your head?

It’s not like you two would usually have heart to hearts but you talked, at least. You were friendly. So you don’t get why suddenly San is being so distant. For Wooyoung’s sake, you promised yourself you’d do your best to ignore it all. Be the bigger person and not get involved with whatever bullshit had his panties in a twist.

A whole day into the trip and you had to resist the urge to punch him in the face for behaving like an immature teenager multiple times. But you keep contact to a minimum. Complain to Yeosang in the comfort of your hotel room. Take several deep breaths. You aren’t good at this whole maintain-inner-peace thing.

“I just wish he would stop ignoring me”

The view from the panoramic terrace of the hotel is breathtaking, but, margarita in hand and sunglasses on, you find yourself not fully appreciating it. Not when you are using your time away from the rest of the group to vent to your best friend. Again.

“Ah, so you do care” the way Yeosang wiggles his eyebrows makes you want to wipe off that smirk on his face.

“No, I don’t” he doesn’t look too convinced. “Seriously! He’s just making it hard to get along with him”

“Or is his distance making you think about stuff you don’t want to think about?” you hate how much your best friend knows you. You let out an exasperated sigh.

The last thing you should be thinking about was your ex, but you can’t help it. He wouldn’t usually behave like that and, you had to admit, it threw you for a loop. Not to mention how you despise the way you still catch yourself thinking about him. It’s subconscious at this point and it's been hard to accept. Had he finally moved on? Were you the only one left running in circles inside your head?

No matter how much distance there is between the two of you, he’s still there, in a corner of your mind. Like a phantom pain, he follows you in the most mundane of things. The frozen aisle at the supermarket still reminds you of his favorite ice cream brand. When buying Christmas presents, your brain immediately goes to the one thing he’s been obsessing over. The reminders zap you like an electric shock, bringing you back to reality. San is a friend now - they say. Nothing more, nothing less. And so you’d berate your heart for acting like he wasn’t. You’d put down the tube of mint-choco ice cream with a sigh, and choose fucking socks as a present.

“Promise we won’t change?”

It was hard to make out the look on his face through the tears in your eyes. You never thought breaking up would hurt this bad, like giving up a piece of you. It felt like the end of the world. Of your world. One where you could no longer navigate life with San.

“You’ll always be my best friend” he murmured, lips against the skin of your neck. You felt the wetness on his face, too. “We’ll go back to how it was before”

But how could it? Now that you knew what it was like to be loved by him, and what a thing it was to love him. Against all hopes, that night, you hoped he was right.

No amount of space was ever able to lessen the strain the break-up put on your already existing friendship. You keep it amicable, for everyone else’s sake, but it just isn’t like before. It could never be. You both broke that promise, one that perhaps you shouldn’t even have made.

You’ve long realized that it’s closure that you need. Because the two of you healed separately, but never really talked about it together. It’s a conversation you need to have if you intend on being around each other. What scares you the most, though, is the possibility of something happening. Or rather, of you letting it happen. You aren’t so sure about San. If you truly want to let go, you need to know.

The dings of your phones pulls you from your thoughts.

meet in the lobby in an hour-ish? we’re going out!

You share a look with Yeosang, knowing birthday celebrations are due tonight, and Wooyoung isn’t about to hold back.

“Let’s go” your best friend offers an encouraging smile, walking back to the room with you.

The second you go down to meet with your friends, you feel yourself stumble on your heels and almost wish to find a way out of this dinner party. Now, you aren’t a stranger to San’s beauty, you never were. But holy fuck, how you wished that he was still yours. If he were, you could saunter up to him and tell him just how breathtaking he looked with his unbuttoned white shirt and slicked-back hair. The knowledge hits you like a train and leaves you breathless.

You need a drink.

And, boy, do you get one.

You don’t remember the last time you had this much fun. Wooyoung sure knows how to party. The dinner went quite smoothly - safely hidden between Yeosang and Mingi, you didn’t spare much attention to San, not that he spared you any - and soon after the birthday boy dragged you to a club.

“Sunshine!” Wooyoung appears out of nowhere, stealing you away from your impromptu dance battle against a buzzed Mingi. “Don’t you look stunning” he compliments, twirling you around, flirty as usual. You cackle, throwing your hands on his shoulders.

“Thanks Woo, you look dashing” you wink back, dancing with him.

“You shouldn’t be saying that to me,” he laughs. The confusion in your eyes must be enough for him to elaborate. “I noticed you’ve been eyeing a certain someone… who happened to be eyeing back”

“Who?” you’re going to fight this. No way.

“Don’t play dumb now” his face gets closer until his lips are pressed against the shell of your ear. “If looks could kill, I’d be dust right now. So would be Mingi” you gape at him, watching as he smiles amusedly.

“Wooyoung, we’re not going to talk about me and him during your birthday party”

“Oh, please! My birthday wish is for you two to get back together already!” homeboy is drunk. Your jaw hits the floor, and you smack his arm. He just laughs harder.

“Wooyoung, what!? You can’t be serious”

“Come on! You’re both incredibly oblivious about your feelings. It's getting sad” he groaned in frustration. “You’re still obviously hung up on each other and I can’t take it anymore, it’s excruciating! Take me out of this misery”

“There’s a reason we called it quits, Woo” you deadpan, taking a step back from him.

“And it’s a stupid one,” he looks like he’s about to say more, but he can’t.

“Alright enough” because Yunho, your saving grace, intervenes. “We’re going back to our booth” he shoots you an apologetic smile, half dragging the birthday boy away and back to the others. You don’t know how much of the conversation he caught, but judging by the good-natured scolding he’s doing, it was enough. You sigh, deciding it’s time for your well-deserved drink. As soon as you reach the bar, you claim the last free stool for yourself.

Wooyoung’s words won’t leave you alone. They keep bouncing around in your head louder than the booming music. Was it really a stupid reason? But most of all, how drunk does he have to be to insinuate that San is still in love with you? That you are still in love with him?

You nod to the bartender when the drink lands in front of you.

The night you broke up is a tangled up mess of emotions and memories you rarely ever allow to resurface. At first, it hurt too much, and then, just like everything else San, you tried to forget in order to move on. But if you think long enough, you still feel him slip away from you, the hollow in your chest when you woke up the morning after and his head wasn’t resting on the pillow beside yours.

Lazily, you toy with the straw of your drink.

It was something about work and it keeping you apart that drove a wedge into your relationship. The nights when one of you would pass out waiting up for the other started to become the norm. The arguments that the lack of each other’s presence fired up outnumbered the sweet talks you used to have over dinner.

Bitter words were spoken, and everything crashed and burned to its fateful end. The mutual decision to break it off before you broke the other seemed the best option. You never truly gave yourself time to think if you regretted it, afraid that bringing it up would only prevent you from letting San go. So, you foolishly swept it under the rug.

And now, here you are, downing your drink in response to the wave of emotions Wooyoung’s words elicited in you. Trying to ignore how your skin crawls every time the man sitting beside you lays his eyes on you. Inching away every time he tries to talk to you.

“We’re leaving” there is no mistaking his voice, but it feels so foreign. You turn around, facing him. His unreadable eyes send a chill down your spine. You lift a brow in question.

“You’re drunk,” San shrugs. “I’m taking you back to the hotel”

Who does he think he is? Looking down at you from his high horse of righteousness, worrying about you like he cared. You scoff.

“‘M not and you most definitely aren’t” you turn around in your seat, facing away from him.

“Are too, come on” San’s hand reaches for your arm, turning you back around and trying to safely get you off the stool.

“And what’s it to you?” you finally snap, shrugging him off. “You haven’t spoken more than two words to me the whole trip, why do you care now?”

Despite your resolution not to cry, or not to care, you feel tears stinging in your eyes. So much for not letting him phase you.

“Yeah, let go man” all hopes of getting out of this situation are ruined the second the guy sitting beside you speaks. You roll your eyes, bracing for what’s to come and cursing yourself for not leaving the bar after getting your drink. “Who are you to ruin their fun?”

“I’m their boyfriend”

Of course.

But you can’t deny that the way he says it - like he very much believes it - moves something inside you.

San doesn't waste any time and doesn’t wait for a reply. His fingers wrap around your wrist delicately, making goosebumps cover your skin. His hold is familiar, warm and it makes you feel like crying. Too stunned to speak, you let him carry you through the stuffy club, not even bothering to apologize to the people you bumped into.

It takes way longer than you’d like to get out of the club, and the lump in your throat is getting harder to ignore by the second. Suddenly, you don’t feel like blaming San all that much for ignoring you.

Once the cold air of the night hits you, you free yourself from his firm grasp. San stops dead in his tracks, looking at you. You can’t do this right now. You worked so hard to keep things civil between you two, you can’t fight with him on Wooyoung’s day. Knowing that one more word from him would break you. You take a deep breath.

“You just had to do that, didn’t you?” Clearly, it didn’t work.

“And here I was, thinking I was going to get a thank you”

You point a finger at his chest. “I can handle my own, San” and there it is, that look on his face that tells you he knows better. He knows you. And for a moment, you hate that he’s right. For a moment, you hate him for fucking with your head. “And you know perfectly well what I’m talking about”

“Do I?”

“What do you want me to tell you, San? You’ve been acting all distant and righteous these past couple of days, and then you pull this stunt?” This is most certainly a conversation you don’t want to have in the middle of the street, but oh well. “You could’ve just asked if I wanted a ride back to the hotel, there was no need for all that”

A gust of wind blows by, making you shiver. When San moves closer, all traces of his anger gone, you stand still, holding your breath. Dumbstruck, you follow his every movement. San peels his jacket off, only to drape it over your shoulders. Something he’s done a million times before. A melancholy so strong pulls at your heartstrings. You didn’t think he noticed. His touch lingers a second too long, eyes looking into yours as if asking if what he just did was alright.

“Thanks” you mumble, watching him step back. The warmth melts your anger away as much as it messes with your head. You don’t like how the air shifts and becomes heavy with the weight of words left unsaid.

But what would you even tell him? That, apparently, for how much you tried, you can't move on? That he lingers in your mind, in your heart, your apartment. That he’s still all over you, and you don’t know how to shrug him off – you aren’t even sure if you want to.

“I miss you” the words leave your lips before you have a chance to stop them. You definitely shouldn’t have drunk tonight. San’s eyes are on you in a split second, but yours stay focused on the pavement. You can feel his gaze putting you on the spot, begging you to say more. You don’t.

“Me too” he speaks so quietly that his words almost get lost in the night.

San waves a taxi over and helps you in. The whole ride back is quiet; you’re a second away from bursting into tears, having finally realized the extent of your feelings for San. Only cursing Wooyoung for being right keeps you in one piece until you reach the door to your room.

You go to unlock it and turn around to give him his jacket back. Not being surrounded by his scent sends your heart to your feet. You can’t believe all the work you did not to feel like this anymore has gone to shit.

“Thank you,” you say once more, before turning to step into your dark room so you can cry to your heart’s content and pretend none of this happened in the morning.

San’s hand grips yours, stopping you in your tracks. When he whispers your name, you’re done for. One second you’re about to hide in your room and the other he’s turning you to him. You can see how he's looking for the words to say. You know that expression all too well, you recognize the furrow of his brow. Then e pulls you closer and the breath gets knocked out of your lungs. He’s closer than he’s ever been in a year and pressed as you are against his chest, you’re afraid he might hear the way your heart is furiously beating.

His sorry eyes are scanning every inch of your face, or so you think, blinking back tears. Under his gaze, you’re burning. Because you want him to let you go and hold you closer at the same time. His hands on your hips are still delicate, you can break free at any time, but you’re not sure you want to.

Your breath hitches when his forehead connects to yours, you can’t breathe, you can’t think-

And then he’s kissing you, and it’s like coming home. It tastes sweet like your drink and bitter like the whiskey on his tongue. You’re unsure if the saltiness is from your tears or his. It’s familiar and your gut tells you that it’s so right, so good that you push yourself closer, lose yourself in him. San’s hold on you is almost bruising, and he’s kissing you like you’re the only thing he’s ever known. Like he used to when he wanted to show you just how much he loved you-

You push away from him like you’ve been stunned. His confused eyes search your face, asking what’s wrong. You clear your voice, but no words leave your mouth. So, when he calls your name with a voice so fragile that it makes you shiver, it’s all you can do to bid him goodnight and finally lock yourself in your room.

Your lips are still tingling, you still feel San’s mouth on yours. In the darkness, a sob wrecks you. You’re supposed to be over him. You spent so much time trying to be. Your heart shouldn’t be breaking this way; for the time you lost trying to forget him, for how all your efforts were in vain.

“Let me in” though muffled by the door, his voice makes you jump. “Please”

Another loud sob escapes you, and you curse yourself for not stepping away from the entrance. Of course, he’d stay. Of course, he’d hear. Well, you can’t run now, can you?

When you open the door, San’s head shoots up. He goes to take a step but hesitates. You simply open the door wider, and he visibly relaxes. After letting him in, you close the door and turn on the lights. The silence is thick, and you almost can’t breathe.

“I’m sorry” he starts, catching your attention. “I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t have done a lot of things these past few days” despite your tears, you manage a scoff.

“Why?” it’s all that leaves your lips, but you know he’s caught on. You’re met with silence. Disappointment spreads like wildfire in your heart. He doesn't even have an answer - you bitterly think.

“So you’ve got nothing to say for yourself?” you push, starting to feel the anger bubble up inside. “You know how hard I’ve tried to make this trip work for Wooyoung's sake? For all our friends' sake? So that they don’t have to walk on eggshells around us, or invite us out one at a time?”

“And I haven’t!?”

“Oh, don’t sound so surprised, San!” you take a step closer. “We were doing alright, why’d you have to go and act like you have a stick up your ass whenever I’m around? Wooyoung’s your best friend, for crying out loud!”

“Don’t act all high and mighty! Have you ever considered, hell, even ever stopped to think-”

“Have I?” oh, if he only knew. “Have I? All I ever do is think, San! You’ve haunted all of my what-ifs ever since we broke up. So you can’t go ahead and pull shit like this when I’ve been trying my damn best”

Your voice is thick with emotion and your throat feels tight. The deafening silence that meets you makes your ears ring. San visibly deflates and the way he speaks is in open contrast to how you just did.

“Would you keep trying?” you don’t remember the last time you heard him sound so small. Still, his eyes are so full of determination.

“Why would I?” you ask, defeated. It’s like a flip switches inside him.

“Because I love you! I still love you”

Time stops, and for a moment nothing exists but you and your racing heart. It’s going so fast you fear it might beat out of your chest, or that he might hear it. It’s so loud that it rings in your ears. A surprised gasp escapes your lips: you understood perfectly fine, you just can’t believe the words he just so desperately uttered.

“I’ve been in love with you longer than I can remember. I loved you when I thought I’d never get to tell you again. I loved you when loving you quietly and at a distance was all I could do, but it was alright as long as I got to love you”

“San…”

“I’m sorry for earlier. I’m sorry for these last couple of days. There’s no excuse, but I just…” he sighs, closing his eyes. You go to take another step, but all determination to do so dies when you see him produce a little velvet box from his pocket. Your breath hitches and a sigh of his name leaves you. “All I could think about leading up to this trip was our first anniversary. You remember how we joked about eloping in Las Vegas?”

It seems your tears won’t stop flowing. You can’t believe he remembers. It was such a small thing, it takes you a second to connect the dots. It was a comment thrown around, something you said to make him laugh. Though you remember thinking that if he’d asked, you would’ve said yes in a heartbeat.

“I’ve had this since then” hope sparks in your heart, though you’re not really sure you’re even breathing right now.

“San-”

“Don’t. I know this is so incredibly stupid, I don’t even know why I brought this with me-”

“Ask me” finally, finally he looks up at you and there’s no doubt in your mind. You still love him, you always have. You always will.

“What?”

“Choi San, ask me or I will” he’s blanking, frozen in his spot. So, you get down on one knee. His eyes widen and you hear sounds of protest. Suddenly it’s a race on who’s speaking first, both on your knees, face to face. You’re giggling like idiots, tears in your eyes.

“I thought that I could manage life without you” he starts, and you let him intertwine your fingers. “I thought we could go back to being happy without being in love. That we’d be better at a distance, but I was so wrong. The only thing that matters is that you make me happier than I ever thought I could be, and if you let me, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. Fighting to make us work. I already made the mistake of giving you away once, I'll never make it again"

"Will you marry me?”

You waste no time in kissing him, big smiles barely making it a kiss, but you don’t care. You don’t care because San just asked you to marry him. Because he’s lifting you up and spinning you around and kissing you like he’ll die if he doesn’t. And for the first time in a while, you’re happy. So happy you could burst, laughing like you haven’t since you let him go.

“Do you think we should go get married?” he asks, swaying you around in his arms. You stare up at him, snorting.

“Maybe let’s wait till tomorrow, when our friends aren’t drunk off their faces, you know?” he chuckles, looking at you like you’re the only thing that could ever hold his attention. How could you ever convince yourself even for one second that you didn’t want to fight for him?

bonus:

Yunho’s slowly munching on a croissant, head resting on Mingi’s shoulder – who’s barely awake. You fear Wooyoung’s not even on your same astral plane right now, forehead against the table and hand gripping a coffee cup for dear life. Yeosang’s head is thrown back against the wall, he’s sipping slowly at his own coffee. It almost makes you think that you and San walking hand in hand could go unnoticed.

“Is that a ring?” you should’ve known Seonghwa’s sharp eyes wouldn’t miss it. After all, he’s the only one remotely awake. That, and he’s the only one not wearing sunglasses at the breakfast table. Lethargically, your friends’ faces emerge from behind the shades. Various sets of eyes squint in your direction as you come closer.

“Holy fuck you got back together” surprisingly, the voice is Wooyoung’s, though he sounds exactly like he just came back from the dead.

“Technically, we got engaged,” San points out. The words have barely left his mouth that suddenly his best friend is up and asking what, how, when, and why?! Eliciting various groans and shut the fuck ups.

“My birthday wish came true!” he throws himself at you both, squeezing you in a hug. Over his shoulder, you look at Yeosang. Despite his tired face, he smiles at you. So do the rest of your friends.

“Alright so, wedding tonight before we leave?” Wooyoung smirks all too enthusiastically, and you hear Seonghwa mumble as long as we drink juice, eliciting a round of quiet laughs.

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nastasya--filippovna · 5 months ago

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Hey Everybody!

Taking into account the recent developments regarding the "block-spree" against my side blog @thegeorgiatennantblog I have decided to discontinue the blog. That is to say I won't be posting anymore although I can't find it in my heart to delete it. I really didn't want to do this but its kinda obvious at the moment that there's no point in running a blog that's blocked by half of Tumblr. Because I'm not talking about tinhatter blogs. I wear their blocks like a pride pin. I'm talking about pro-Georgia or anti-shipper blogs. It's their "blocks" that I don't understand. And it hurts too.

I tried everything on my part to mitigate the damage. I cut off the toxicity by deleting any creepy anons I received and going for a "no-reply" policy for such asks. And I once again apologize all those that may have been hurt by my blog's actions (notwithstanding that they were unintentional).

It was good while it lasted. I got to meet so many whimsical, sweet people, got to share absolute awesomeness, peak gorgeousness and unhinged feralness. And I want to thank all those that supported me when I started it and gave my blog so much love everyday.

So hats off to:

@abiiii-ineffable @literatemisfit @reloha @do-angels-dream-of-starry-seas @ivankaramazov07

@dtmsrpfcringe @sakuranova07 @davidtennantgenderenvy @lemonycheesecakes @ineffable-ezra

@princeloww @mystic-mae @thatdelusionalnerd @doolittleandco @maddyjones2

@mcbash @ineffablequeermoony and all my other followers! I love y'all! NGL I'll miss this.

Meena. x

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gabrielthejester · 2 months ago

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Pm now ,let's chat

Uhh.... Pm... Port Mafia?

Sure lmao. You kinda look like a bot, and I'm sure pm probably means something else (no idea what) but I will absolutely talk about the Port Mafia!!

Mori- well written villain, would be a lot more appreciated by me if he wasn't a pedophile. His character is a major plot for several other characters traumatic experiences and growth.

Kouyou- happy she exists, she definitely did traumatize kyouka, but she's one of the tricky cases where I don't think she meant to hurt her. She was taught one way and she tried to stop kyouka from making the same "mistakes" she did. Morally grey for me.

Chuuya- cmon man.. he's chuuya. If any chuuya stans/kins wanna get emotional, translate the lyrics of the bsd song Lily, and know that they were supposed to be about/from chuuyas perspective. It breaks my heart how loyal to a fault this man is.

Akutagawa- As someone with incurable illnesses, I have soft spots for his bitterness, and relate very much to his need for validation and attention. Really hope the path he's going down now leads to a full redemption arc for his character.

Verlaine- he's bad, I know. I hate what he's done, but I can't help but feel bad for him and also GOD DAYUM HES HOT (I can't help it)

Rimbaud- ((see above))

Gin- I love the non gender specific representation with her. She's a well written character, and a genderfluid monarch. Definitely would love to see more of her 👍

Tachihara- they took my fucking eyes :(/ref

Oda- my gosh this man deserved so much better...

Higuchi- I hate her. I hate her because she's me. I hate her I hate her I hate her. She's too much like me. I can't stand it. It makes me cringe so bad.

Hirotsu- underrated ngl, probably bc they don't get much screen time. He's a good leader of his group.

Kyu- dang there's a lot of mixed opinions on them. I can't bring myself to hate them, they've been defined by their ability by people. Similar to chuuya or atsushi. Also once again, gender nonconforming representation!!

Lmk if I missed some of ur favs, or if you want me to elaborate on anything!! I also have some ideas for which Ada member will be transferred to the Pm, I can talk about that too!!!

#bsd #bungo stray dogs manga #bungou gay dogs #bungou stray dogs #manga #pm #port mafia #mori bsd #bsd kouyou #bsd chuuya #bsd akutagawa #bsd verlaine #bsd rimbaud #higuchi bsd #bsd tachihara #bsd odasaku #bsd gin #bsd hirotsu #bsd kyusaku

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moonknightshifts13 · 1 year ago

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Fell Out of Love?

Pre-marriage Steven Grant + Jake Lockely x gender-neutral reader (Angst)

note: yeah, I felt like writing another one lol. This one kinda hurt me ngl. We love angst stories about the moon boys.

It’s been a few months since I last talked to Steven. The last time I saw him it was when we were picking out the color themes for our wedding. We went home and then that same night, I felt him get up from our bed and heard the door close. I didn’t think much of it since he’s still Khonshu’s avatar – not by choice though – we can blame that one on Jake, but we didn’t know at the time. A few days passed by and I didn’t think much of it, just thinking that whatever mission they were on was going to take a while. Those days turned into a week, then that week turned into a month, then that month turned into months. I messaged him more than once and called more than once.

“Steven, hun. When are you going to be back? We have our appointment for my dress fitting soon. Um, please call back.”

“Steven, it’s been a week now. I know Jake or Marc is probably fronting for the mission, but I’d appreciate it if you could come home just for the appointment. Love you”

“Steven, where are you? You missed the dress fitting appointment. It’s been a month. Is Khonshu keeping you guys longer? Please let me know so I don’t worry, love you Steven”

“Steven, please answer my calls and messages. I’m getting worried love. Are you boys okay? Did something happen? Please call me back when you can…I love you”

Eventually, I stopped calling and messaging as every call was never answered and every message was left on delivered. At some point, I started to question whether Steven was ever going to come back…that was until today.

I sat on the bed as I was writing emails when I heard the front door open. My heart immediately raced, and I quickly jumped out of the bed, leaving my computer behind. As I walked towards the bedroom door, it opened, and Steven was there. He looked at me and he looked tired, beyond tired. I stared at him with concern and guilt.

“Steven, what happened? Are you hurt? Why did you guys take so long? Are Marc and Jake okay? Where were yo-”

“Stop”

I looked at him confused and stunned by his stern voice. Steven avoided looking at me and he just looked off to the side.

“What- Steven, love… what happened-”

“Stop calling me that…”

“What?”

Steven looks at me, but it’s not Steven…it’s Jake. I look at Jake even more confused and concerned,

“Oh, Jake…I didn’t know, I’m sor-”

“Steven doesn’t want to marry you.”

I don’t process the words he’s said until I see his facial expression turn sour. My heart drops and my expression turns into a pained one.

“What? No- no, you’re lying. Steven would’ve told me- he would’ve told me Jake!”

“He didn’t want to hurt you, so he told me to tell you. We’re just here to get our things and leave”

I shake my head and tears start to form in my eyes. Jake walks past me and he gets his duffel bag from out of the closet, turning around and starting to pack their clothes. I shake my head again and I grab onto Jake’s jacket.

“No, no, no- please. Please, tell me why he doesn’t want to marry me! Please Jake, you can’t do this to me- he can’t do this to me. What did I do wrong? We can talk about it, please-”

“There’s nothing to talk about, he doesn’t want to marry you. End of the story”

“Jake, please- let me talk to Steven! Just let me talk to me and we can figure this ou-”

“Como chingas- HE DOESN’T LOVE YOU ANYMORE, OKAY?! HE FELL OUT OF LOVE!”

I freeze and I just stare at Jake with teary eyes. Jake looks at me for a second, a flash of hurt evident but it goes away. He turns away from me and he keeps packing their clothes. I let go of Jake’s jacket sleeve and I turned away from him.

“You don’t have to pack, I’ll get my stuff and leave when you guys aren’t here”

Jake freezes and he turns to look at me, but I’m facing away from him. He opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out. I let my tears stream down my cheeks but no sounds come out. I go to the closet and I grab my bag, I turn to the bedroom door and I exit the bedroom. I hear Jake’s footsteps follow along as I make my way towards the front door.

“y/n…wait-”

“Goodbye Jake…tell Steven that I love him…I love you all, dearly. I’m sorry that I wasn’t enough for him”

I say softly and faintly as I leave through the front door and close it behind me. Jake just stares at the front door, now regretting his decision on interfering with Steven and I’s relationship. He didn’t think that I would actually leave, just like that. Well, how was I supposed to stay with someone who “fell out of love” with me? Little did I know that this was part of Jake’s plan. His plan to protect his brothers. His plan to make sure that I didn’t hurt sweet, innocent Steven’s heart. His plan to get rid of me, not knowing that Steven would never talk to him ever again. Not knowing that the one who hurt Steven’s heart was him: for chasing me away and telling me lies about Steven. Steven, yelling and shouting at Jake in his head for chasing me away, for telling me a lie about him falling out of love with me. Steven, telling Jake that he would never forgive him for ruining his marriage. Jake not knowing that Steven would no longer front nor make appearances ever again. He didn’t want to risk having Steven get hurt, yet he was the one to cause Steven’s pain and end his marriage.

#moon knight #angst moon knight #moon knight x reader #steven grant x reader #jake lockely x reader #angst #this lowkey kinda hurt #angsty #angsty with no happy ending #moon knight fanfic

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queenpiranhadon · 1 year ago

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A/N:Yayyy first time writing Stardew fics AND an x reader, so this should be interesting lmao. If you liked this lemme know so I can do more like this in the future! This one was written a long time ago ngl, found this in the plethora of my notes app 0-0 banner art isn't mine!! The one on the left belongs to the amazing @cat-terpillar Here's my masterlist!

Warning(s): A little angst I guess, it has a fluffy ending, one sided love (for now), reader and Robin are besties lmao, strangers(?) to sorta friends, Sebastian’s kinda mean, Reader is a s i m p, reader is referred to with feminine attributes.

Pairing(s): Sebastian x F!Reader

•────•°•❀•°•──── ᴘᴜᴍᴘᴋɪɴ ꜱᴏᴜᴘ ────•°•☁︎•°•───•

You were finally moving to Stardew Valley! Your late grandpa had given his farm to you, in hopes you’d carry on the legacy. He knew you were always fascinated by the farm life. But there was something that intrigued you more than that. After settling in, you decided to walk around the town and introduce yourself to the villagers. There were daffodils growing around your farm, and you prepared them, a gift for your new community members. There were many of them, and they all seemed to love you. There was Pierre, and Emily, and Alex, and so many others. But one caught your attention the most. Robin’s son, Sebastian. He was around your age, but unlike the other villagers, he rejected every single gift you gave him. Daffodils, summer spangles, fairy roses, everything. He just gave you that same bone chilling look of distaste and annoyance. And it made your heart feel heavy. You didn’t know why you were trying so hard to win his affection. He was just another villager. Right? But there was something in his raven hair, and glittering eyes that drew you to him. You chided yourself constantly, knowing it was just a small crush, and that it would go away. At least, that’s what you told yourself. Deep down, you knew you loved him, and that you wanted to give him the world, even though he didn’t feel like he deserved it. But it was hopeless. He hated you, and thought you were a nuisance. But your heart still yearned and fantasized about the gloomy boy reciprocating your love.

It was pointless. His beautiful dark eyes always glinted with annoyance whenever you approached him and eventually you resigned to your farm work, and tried to focus on your crops and livestock. But Sebastian was always on your mind.

One day, when you had gathered enough gold and acquired enough supplies, you went to the mountains, to purchase a house upgrade. You were anxious, half hoping to run into Sebastian, and half not. The boy in question also wanted to see you. No matter how much you annoyed him, your abrupt disappearance left him disgruntled and confused. He felt… empty without your constant nagging. It was strange and the feeling was foreign to him. But he brushed it off, and trudged upstairs to grab a slice of pizza from the fridge. But he froze when he saw you, at his mom’s desk, where she offered upgrades and additions to houses or farm buildings. Startled, he wondered if some supernatural being was reading his thoughts, considering you were previously on his mind.

“Wha-what are you doing here?” He spluttered, embarrassed and a bit angry, due to your withdrawal.

You stand there, speechless, not only because he actually initiated conversation with you for once, but because he seemed hurt. His beautiful eyes spoke volumes. Did he… miss you? No, of course not.

“I was uh…” You didn’t know what to say.

Robin cut in. “She’s just buying a house upgrade, leave her alone Sebby.” She rolls her eyes.

Sebastian scoffs, and grabs his pizza slice, disappearing into the basement where he practically hibernated.

Turning back to Robin, you flush, noticing the smirk on her face.

“You want to impress Sebastian? Here. It’s a recipe for Pumpkin Soup.” She takes out a scrap piece of paper, writing a neat and detailed recipe for you. “He loves this stuff. I can tell you’ve taken a liking to him. And thank Yoba you do. That boy needs to get a girlfriend. Sitting around in the basement all day…” sighing, Robin hands the paper to you.

Your eyes widen, in shock. “How did you- I can’t-“

Robin chuckles. “Just say thank you. Fall’s around the corner. Grow some pumpkins in time for his birthday.” her sly grin fades into a wistful smile. “Sebby‘s been taking my marriage with Demetrius harshly… he’s a good kid, I just wish he’d explore the world a little more. After he lost his father… he just wasn’t the same.”

You stand there, your heart heavy. You never knew he had suffered this much… It made you feel even worse.

“I-I’m so sorry…” you murmur.

Robin rubs the back of her neck sheepishly. “Sorry to ruin the mood… I’m just saying, you’re an amazing girl. And I just want the best for my son.” She smiles and takes your hands. “Now go get your man!”

Your grin matches hers and you dash out of the Carpenter’s shop and down into town square. Luckily, it was early enough that Pierre’s hadn’t closed, and you purchased a batch of pumpkin seeds. Rushing home, you till the soil around your home and tenderly plant your seeds, watering the soon to be pumpkins, and ensuring your scarecrow would guard them with its life.

You were determined to give Sebastian everything he wanted and more. You wanted to give him the world. It broke your heart that he suffered so much, and you hated the fact that he was still suffering to this day, his dysfunctional family a reminder of what he had lost.

But you had to start slow. And this pumpkin soup was the answer. With Robin’s words giving you a boost, you powered through the painstakingly slow growth of your crops, trying to keep your impatience at bay. And finally, after days and days of waiting, watering, and teasing from Robin, a healthy patch of pumpkins was grown in front of your eyes.

Your heart swelled with pride, as you ran your fingertips over the smooth and bumpy surface of the bright orange pumpkin you brought inside. It was perfect, the shape, the size. Fall was almost over, winter only a week away. You updated Robin that day, dropping off a package of goat cheese for her birthday. You both had grown close as well, as she had always looked out for you, ever since day one.

That night, you heated up your stovetop, your pan bubbling with water. You cut up your fresh pumpkin, the scent of spices and the feeling of home wafted through the air.

It made you miss you family, and the fun you’d have in the kitchen with them. When was the last time you cooked, two years ago? Packing the soup in an insulated container, you kept it in your fridge, and awaited the day you’d finally give it to the boy that stole your heart.

Winter rolled around, your farm barren with no crops to grow and all your livestock contained in their homes. Munching on a crystal fruit you foraged, you sat on the couch, watching re-runs of the Queen of Sauce. After making pumpkin soup for the first time, the world of cuisine seemed much more interesting to you.

You really had nothing to do, with no crops to grow, no livestock to feed because of the new auto-feeder Robin installed, and no fruits to forage because you already has chests full of them. Clint had your pickaxe for an upgrade, so no mining either. Leaving you with one last option.

You trudged outside, feeling the crunch of snow under your boots and reach at clumps of trees that infested your farm. Sure, having a large supply of trees was good, but you hadn’t tended to it for a while, so it spread to every corner of your farm. You hefted your axe and sighed. Better to keep yourself busy than let your mind fantasize more than you already had.

You really were obsessed, huh?

Your heart was giddy with excitement, thumping precariously as you went to bed that night. Soon, the boy you loved might actually not hate you after all. Still, it hurt that you had to try so hard. You made it your mission to get him to at least befriend you, but the fact that you dedicated an entire season to make a simple pumpkin soup to make him warm up to you seemed pathetic. But Robin wanted to best for him and frankly, so did you. So you were going to befriend him, and make sure he would never be sad again. Or you’d try, at least.

You woke up that morning, your mind hazy but still as excited as ever. It was 6:30, way too early to visit Sebastian, so you ambled around the farm, checking on your animals and collecting their products, and visiting the little cave where Demetrius had set up a mini farm to occasionally get some products as well.

You walk back home, and open your fridge, careful to go as slow as possible to the best of your ability to avoid awkward waiting. Grabbing the pumpkin soup, you place it carefully in your backpack. It was 8:10. You made your way through the back woods, where a path to the Carpenter’s Shop was, and you entered the home. Sebastian was in his room, and you decided to wait outside, knowing that you were overstepping your boundaries enough.

You made some light conversation with Robin who was tending to the shop that day, and eventually Sebastian exited his room, extremely surprised to see you standing there, your face beet red. He seemed equally embarrassed, and Robin shooed you both outside, sending a wink your way.

Sitting on the porch, you look at him, drinking in his features when you notice he was already doing the same.

You clear your throat. “I uh… here.”

Sliding the soup you worked on for so long, over to him, you felt your heart flutter as his pale hands brush yours to take the dish.

“Is this… pumpkin soup?” Sebastian asks in disbelief. “I-I really love this. How did you know?”

You chuckle sheepishly, not wanting to admit all the digging you had to do.

“I figured I should try something new haha…” You chuckle awkwardly. “I…” your sentence trailing off, your voice caught in your throat.

“Hm?” Sebastian looks over, perplexed. He was opening the container to sniff the smell of pumpkin and spices waft through the chilly winter air. Snowflakes coated his eyelashes and his hair, making him seem even more beautiful, if that was even possible.

“I-I’m sorry… for annoying you so much.” You murmur, a weight of worry, heartsickness, and guilt finally being lifted off your chest.

Sebastian stares at you for a minute, taken aback by your confession.

“I'm sorry too.” His deep voice fills the awkward silence.

“What…?” You whisper, shocked. Why was he apologizing?

“I'm sorry for making you think I hated you." He restates, his voice louder but still embarrassed. "I just...don't do well with new people. I'm sorry, I know you were just trying to be nice."

You stare at your hands, soaking up his words. Sebastian…didn’t hate you?

Silence fills the snowy front yard and you both sit there, with no tension or boundaries between you two. Maybe not friends, not yet. But you weren’t enemies either. Just…acquaintances.

Sebastian gingerly reaches over to squeeze your hand, and you reciprocate, your heart involuntarily thumping against your ribcage.

The gesture itself wasn’t intimate, or romantic. It was just a small reassurance to show that he was there.

And you were fine with that.

In fact, you couldn’t be happier.