#and my soul won't know peace. anyway
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bogkeep · 23 days ago
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okay this is an extremely long shot but you never know. i want to look up a story from the donald duck comics. it was a mickey mouse centered story, and i'm pretty sure the artist was either rodriguez or ferioli. the story is about stories and fairytales coming to life and destroying the city - the giant from jack and the beanstalk, midas' curse, and i think the gingerbread cottage were all there. it turns out it was all happening because a boy with a magic book was throwing a tantrum. the muse calliope is there
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bnyf · 2 months ago
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baby you're my bunny ♡
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╭﹕୨୧﹒ bunny boy x female reader
┊ warnings : yandere content and themes, unhealthy behaviors, relationship and relationship dynamic, slight body horror me thinks? slight horror, perverted yandere, non consensual touching, suggestive, uhhh that's it me thinks :3
╰﹕୨୧﹒ authoress note : so sorry if it's badly written also sorry if it ends weird :/
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no survival instinct what's-so-ever. like... none.
but he was not complaining! it was just a mere observation. perhaps you were unaware of your allure, maybe you were not exposed to the cruel world yet, didn't know how sick people and creatures can be.
well for one... your little secret admirer was not one of those adorable bunnies you'd fawn over, nothing even close really. and no, he's not some cute boy with a bunny tail and some bunny ears. he's far from cute, a little scary actually.
humanoid? sure! typical bunny boy hybrid, uhhhh not really lol! he's mixed with human genetics but he's not quit. and for a bunny hybrid, he sure had a lot of predator instincts.
to put simply, he was an abnormality of mother nature. his lower half resembled a bunny whilst his torso and up is that of a man. his claws on his feet or paws or whatever are dangerously long, digging into the dirt whenever he walks, leaving behind a "too small to notice unless your looking for it" trail.
a muscular, lean build, biceps so perfect and manly hands to hold you down if you even ever think of escaping, awe how sweet of him <3
completely pale skin with small patches of equally pale fur in various spots, completely crimson, blood shot eyes and a pair of floppy bunny ears where any normal human's ears would be.
how did he even came to be? you may ask. well he was a normal boy, once upon a time. but one day, he'd gotten into a serious accident, a near death life experience. that day he could've hear the bells of heaven ringing in his ears but he wasn't ready to die, not like this... in his head he begged for more time, asking whatever god above to answer his prayers.
and yeah! his prayers where answered but, as they say, be careful what you wish for...
the moon goddess answered his prayers, but she also cursed him for it is the price he must pay to live longer.
"i grant you more time, as much time as you may need, but for as long as you roam his earth, your soul belongs to me and your purpose, is to server me," her voice rang in his ears like a bittersweet melody before he'd lose consciousness.
when he awake, he found himself in the mountains, he was a monstrosity of a man and dared not step a foot into society. he's to bare this curse and blessing till death.
he became easily bored and clueless as to what to do next, his every day life felt null and everything felt too much to bare. his eternity just began yet he dreads his mistake with every passing day.
"maybe, i should of just accepted my faith and die that day..."
with nothing and no one, he was left to wonder the mountain and serve the goddess by praying to her and tending to her shrine everyday, he's trapped to keep her energy going so she won't become a forgotten god.
(guys i made the lore up on a whim so bare with me even i'm confused right now :0)
anyways! everything drastically changed for our boy here when you and your family decided to move to the village nearby in the rural area, and live a peaceful life and just run a nice little farm hooray! hopefully, you don't get stalked and preyed on by a lonely scarily tall bunny male hybrid who looks like a utterly angelic, celestial eldritch horror, right?
all he could think about was a pretty girl had moved in next door and he just had to watch her from afar. most the villagers were very welcoming of you and your family, it was big talk because such a pretty girl had just moved in the small village and all the villagers wanted their sons or grandsons to get married.
it doesn't have much young people, mostly elders and young children and even less marriageable women. which is why you easily became popular, with everyone always gifting you things, begging you to marry into their family. they even had a town welcome celebration for you and your family!
he watched everything from afar. feeling a slight sting in his chest. jealous? already? of course he is, he wanted you all for himself. for countless nights, he just couldn't sleep at all.
he spent all his time admiring you from afar. the way he'd blush, his heart beat fastening, the gears in his head would just slow down a bit. gosh, he actually felt his heart warm so much it'd burn in his chest.
he wanted you badly.
you were his new source of entertainment, motivation and inspiration all in one and his mind was melting with how needy he started becoming.
"what the f- she's so kind and pretty..."
"i wanna hug her, wanna kiss her, feel her skin on mine, love her, fuck her."
"she can be my little bunny princess~"
"wonder what our babies would look like? i'm getting heated just thinking about it"
it didn't help much when he found out you adored bunnies and would play with them near the spring. fawning over the little fluffy creatures, hugging them and petting them. and when you held them in your arms and give smooches while rubbing your face on their fluffy fur?!?!?
that's where his obsession becomes almost to much to bare, his entire chest area felt so warm watching you treat those bunnies with so much love.
"everything about her is so perfect, i'm starting to crave her like crazy right now."
"wanna whisk her away, take her, lock her up and keep her all to myself."
his mind starts getting clouding with so many dark thoughts of you.
and so, he start pushing boundaries and going outside his comfort zone to appease his little appetite that consist of you. at night, he sneaks in to steal a closer glance at you and probably a few things so he can remember your scent properly.
the whole house was dark, the whole village asleep by the time it was midnight hour. he'd manage to get in somehow somewhere but when he did, he immediately went to your room.
finally. he could smell and touch you as much as he wanted, his mind was actually in ecstasy when he entered your room, your scent gracing his nostrils as soon as he did, and the poor touch starved male couldn't hold back on touching you various parts of your skin.
"how delightful, her skin is so smooth and her hair feels so good, she smells like flowers all over gosh so fucking perfect, i wanna devour her, drink her up, chew her, spit her out and do it all over again" with every slight movement you make and whimper scaping your soft lips, he can't help but hold back his own voice, he wanted to moan just by being around you, it felt so good.
after so long, why wouldn't it feel great?
to be around around someone for once, to feel the heat of another person's body, the sweet scent of someone else other than himself. he'd lay in bed with you, his larger self cuddling your smaller form as smells your hair, trailing his hands all over you.
he was getting ahead of himself.
it takes everything within him to not proceed and do something to you while in your sleep. his morals along with his sanity were drifting away more and more.
time flies by when you're enjoying yourself, before he knew it he had to leave before the sun raises. forcing himself he does but he also takes like 5 things from you.
"promise i'll return your belongings my love, i just need a little souvenir to help myself with."
the poor thing gets sent into an early heat after that little interaction. he's embarrassed a little but he really needs you, like he really does. and he thinks of ways of introducing himself but... he's a monster, you would run from him and be scared. and when that thought comes to mind it makes him... sad.
"if i'd die that day, i'd never meet her, never be able to see her, but now that i'm alive with the help of the moon goddess, i can't even act normal about her. it's like i'm truly doomed."
this realization was tough. it made him sick to think about. and for a while, he was just okay with sneaking in to see you, and holding your unconscious body but he wanted a lot more, and he wanted your acceptance and love. he wanted you to want him the way he wants you.
it hurt even more when he mistakenly glanced in the mirror only to see a 6 feet tall, half human half hybrid bunny with a deadly eerie looking bloody stare, stare right back at him.
the pale moonlight leaking on him, hitting his skin almost making it look silver.
"she'd surely fear me, she'd run."
he's such a beautiful tragedy. would you be able to appreciate that?
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talesofesther · 8 months ago
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I'll crawl home to her
Aemond Targaryen x Reader
Summary: Tales of Aemond's love for you.
A/N: In Ewan's words; the only thing that can beat Aemond is love. If you like this story, you'll like my ongoing series too. ;)
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Aemond loves you behind closed doors.
He loves you with the way his pinky hooks around yours under the tables, during supper and council meetings.
He loves you with subtle looks and barely there smiles across rooms filled with people where he can only see you.
He loves you when he comes back tasting of heartache and guilt, with raindrops or tears staining his cold skin and clothes clinging to his body. When he stumbles into your room whispering sins against your embrace only for you to kiss the words, kiss his cheeks, kiss his scar, kiss the tears away. He clings to your body, your nightgown nearly ripping with his desperation.
But it's alright, because there's only you and him and the soft light of the candles in your room. It's alright because you cradle his head, fingertips burying between wet silver locks. It's alright because you whisper forgiveness into his ears, even if he feels undeserving.
And maybe war is now inevitable, but for a fraction of a moment, Aemond feels entirely at peace.
He loves you when you watch him from afar and notice the stiffness of his shoulders, the tapping of his fingers on the table. And then you'll find an excuse to call his name and get him away from the crowds, asking for some help with something mundane. You lace your fingers together, loose and yet so present. You take a familiar route through a lone hallway, you open the doors to the library hidden away in the confines of the Keep, pull him in, and close it again.
Aemond falls to you, his forehead is leaning against yours, his eye is closed, and he can breathe. You feel like fresh air. He nuzzles his nose to yours before asking for a kiss, it's all timid and bashful, he's not sure how to love yet, all he knows is that he feels it, insistent and warm; all-consuming.
But you hold his cheeks, you guide him, you teach him. Your fingers are in his hair and your soft lips touch the corner of his mouth; all delicate and devoted, Aemond doesn't know what to do with this much love, he might crumble.
His hands are around you, all over, and he's almost afraid to hurt you; even if you promise time and time again that he could never. Aemond sighs against your lips, and it sounds a lot like; "I am yours."
He loves you because there is no need for words with you. When he holds himself back from going to you all day—between planning for a war he's fighting alone and hearing his own mother talk of him as if he were a monster—the arrival of the night feels like a reprieve. It's the moment he waits for the most, for he can lay down his armor.
Aemond walks by the garden, picking up a single blue flower. He hides it away as he walks to your chambers, no one needs to know—even if everyone already knows anyway. He gives you the blue flower, with pink on his cheeks; he feels like a young boy in love—perhaps he is.
You kiss him, sweet and soft and tasting like the blueberries you stole from the kitchen earlier. And Aemond could cry, because if he has you, he's not alone.
You're the one who takes off his eyepatch, and then his coat, and his pants, and pulls loose his hair—you brush your lips over his shoulders when you do it, and he knows no one could love him the way you do. There's nothing sexual about it even if you're the muse of all his desires. He simply lays with you in bed, his head on your chest, and you trace the outlines of his body as you speak about your day. There are goosebumps on his skin, and he loves to hear you speak, about anything and everything, it soothes his troubled soul.
It's quiet, and Aemond falls asleep with the feeling of you braiding his hair. It'll be a little curly in parts when morning comes. He never minds it.
And he loves you with the way he won't be able to speak the three words. But he'll trace and kiss them on your skin every single night. And you understand, because you always say them back.
He loves you because of the way you sometimes hold the tip of his fingers with yours behind your backs.
He loves you with the way he'll threaten death to anyone who looks at you wrong.
He loves you with the way he could burn the whole world and yet not let a single flame touch your skin.
He loves you because you'll kiss his lips even if he tastes of blood and war.
He loves you because you'll hold his pieces together when everyone else is trying to tear him apart.
He loves you because even in the darkest of days, you're always there in the end.
He loves you because even if you exchange nothing but glances when amidst other people, you'll embrace his very soul in private.
He loves you because you wait with bathed breath when he takes Vhagar to the skies, and never think twice about mounting on a horse to gallop towards the woods outside of King's Landing when you spot the dragon's large silhouette bringing him back.
You jump from the white horse, Aemond jumps from Vhagar, and you meet each other in the middle. He holds you close in a needy embrace, as if each minute could be the last. And when you pull back, you don't ask questions or make demands, you simply run your thumbs over his cheekbones and breathe easiness into his skin. The feeling of you is always like coming home.
Amidst a world of war, you're a safe haven.
He loves you because you are the one who taught him what love feels like.
Aemond loves you behind closed doors. Wholly, truly, passionately. And with all of him that no one else is allowed to see.
⋆* ☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚
Aemond's taglist is open, let me know if you'd like to be added. Or you can follow @talesofesther-library and turn notifications on to know when I’ve posted a new story/chapter.
Thank you for reading this little story. Feedback and reblogs are literally what keeps me motivated to continue posting here, so I’d appreciate it if you could take some time to reblog and comment. <3
You do not have permission to repost, copy, or translate my works on any platforms (even with credit), please respect.
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exqorcism · 3 months ago
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𓍯 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 ' . . . nicholas alexander chavez my emotions are naked, they're taking me out of my mind
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⸝⸝⸝ 𓏲 𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆. . . nicholas a. chavez x fem!reader
a/n. this took almost 2 months to complete but i'm so happy with how this came out !!! i hope you enjoy // this one's for you, @iamsebastiansstan <3 manifesting this for us
warnings. 18+ — minors dni! smut, that including unprotected piv, name calling, kinda hate sex ? crying during + after sex &&& lots of plot beforehand | wc. ۪13.494  ⊹ 𓄹 ࣪ . ݁
— english is not my first language ! feedback is appreciated
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"Do we really need to set those fucking rules? You're not gonna abide by them anyway", you chuckled, you're bare back pressing against Nicholas' sweaty chest as he held you close. You felt it rise and fall with every sharp breath he took, the smell of sex and sweat filling the small space of his room. With your palms pressed tightly against the wall and Nicholas' hands rubbing up and down your sides, you felt surprisingly at peace.
"Speak for yourself. I just wanna make sure we're on the same page here", he mumbled, slipping out of your pussy in one, swift movement, and you winced, turning back towards him with a small smile plastered on your face. You were utterly spent, but nonetheless satisfied as you straightened the material of your skirt, making sure you looked presentable, even in your fucked-out state.
"What do you say about... fuck buddies? No feelings involved. Nothin' more than a good fuck once in a while", Nicholas shrugged, pulling his pants up his legs, and you nodded, running your palms over your hair to tame the strands that slipped out of your slicked back hairstyle.
"Yeah, sounds good. Just know", you lowered your voice, standing on your tiptoes to whisper in his ear. "I'm unable to resist. Let's hope you don't fall in love with me in the process".
Nicholas chuckled, his thumb pressing against your lower lip as he cradled your cheek, looking down at you with authority that made your breath hitch. "Don't worry. I won't".
How fucking ironic.
Nicholas' voice echoed in your head as you stood there, immersed in silence, just by the bar's emergency exit door. You could almost feel his presence next to you, his hot breath on your neck, this stupidly attractive smirk that he always sent your way. The way his eyes gazed deep into your soul, as if he could read you like an open book.
Sometimes you had a feeling he knew you better than you knew yourself.
You hated yourself for letting him ruin your night. The buzz you got from the alcohol started to pass, and all that was left inside you was sorrow and anger. The distinctive smell of smoke lingered in the air around you as you took another puff of your half-burnt out cigarette, inhaling deeply, as if the toxin could heal the wounds Nicholas left in your heart.
In your head, you could clearly see it — Nicholas standing a couple of feet away from you, his back facing you. Your friends' laughter erupted in your ears as one of them made a really bad joke, most of them completely drunk by now, barely able to stand straight. Your attention was solely focused on him — the man you came here for in the first place. You hadn't seen him in two weeks, for God's sake! It soon became obvious why, though. A tall, long-haired blonde woman approached the group, the sound of her heels clicking against the floor heard even through the loud music. She leaned against Nicholas, wrapping her arms around his neck, and he responded immediately with rubbing his hands up and down her sides. Suddenly, you felt very uncomfortable in your own skin — the soft fabric of your embarrassingly short dress pressing tightly against your body now suffocating. You wore it only for him, and he didn't even spare you a glance. With teary eyes, you watched as he leaned down, pressing his lips against hers, which were much bigger and fuller than yours, you noted. Your bottom lip trembled slightly as you sipped on your drink, your gaze falling to the floor.
What did you do wrong?
Another inhale, another exhale. You played with the necklaces hanging loosely around your neck, feeling your muscles relax a bit as you did so. No matter how dumb that sounded, the cool metal felt refreshing against your fingertips, grounding you to the moment. No matter how hard you tried, though, you couldn't get Nicholas out of your head. The night was hot, although you could feel an uninvited shiver run down your spine as you let your mind wander to him again, again and again.
Friends with benefits, he said. No boundaries, just sex between two best friends. The rules were simple enough — but somehow, you managed to break all of them.
No staying overnight. But you did — so many times, letting Nicholas cuddle you through the night, finding comfort and safety in his warm embrace. No kissing. No cuddling afterwards. No catching feelings. And the most important, at least for Nicholas, as he emphasised many times before — No seeing other people. He mentioned that it was for safety reasons, but you didn't believe him — maybe you hoped he wanted you all to himself, the same way you wanted him.
Everything had changed. You looked at him in ways you never dared to before — you started to see a man in him. It started innocently enough. His hand raking through your hair after practically fucking your soul out of you, his eyes filled with hesitation, as if he was scared to touch you, take care of you — but he did. He always did.
Then, he told you to stay overnight. The warmth of his arms around you, his intoxicating smell wrapping around you like a blanket, his soothing hands rubbing against your shoulder and thigh, lips ghosting over your forehead and damp hair. The way he kissed you as if you were the most precious being, lulling you to your sleep after forcing you to take a shower. His smile when he looked down at you with quiet adoration that he hoped you didn't notice. But you did. You always did.
You knew you crossed a line you couldn't uncross, but it was too late to turn back.
The universe seemed to laugh at you, now, as you sat there, alone, hugging your arms to your chest in hopes to ease the aching of your heart. The first drop of the warm, summer rain fell on your skin, dripping down the side of your hand as you shakily exhaled.
The silence of the outside world, compared to the chaos happening inside the bar was almost suffocating, but somehow comforting. You wrapped your jacket around yourself, even though your body was on fire. Maybe you were just trying to shield yourself from the feelings you had towards Nicholas, maybe you just hoped it'd all go away if you hid behind the oversize jacket. Without a second thought, you took the cigarette pack out of your pocket, lighting one up, watching as it got damp due to the — now harder — rain.
"You're pretty", you thought you heart him mumble just as you poured milk into the bowl, glancing at the recipe in order to get everything right. You froze mid-mixing the dough, breath caught in your throat, the music softly blasting in the background long forgotten. Nicholas stood by your side, leaning against the counter, watching you more than actually helping — just as he always did. His attentive eyes bore into the side of your face shamelessly, and you sent him a quick glance, small smirk tugging on the corner of your lips as you processed his words.
"Sure", you replied simply, chuckling to yourself, even though you could hear your heart pound in your throat. "I'm sure you say that to every girl you hang out with".
It was Nicholas' time to chuckle. He shifted, leaning forward to look over your shoulder, his eyes following you mixing the dough in the small bowl. Your attempts to stop the trembling of your hands were useless as the spoon slipped out of your grasp, falling onto the floor with a defeating bang.
"Easy there, love", he teased, leaning down to grab it for you, leaving a soft peck on your thigh as he did. An unwanted shiver run down your spine, and you found yourself turning your head to look at him as he straightened his posture, towering over you. "I don't. You're the only one I call pretty".
You gulped as Nicholas met your gaze, small smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he studied your nervous expression. You couldn't help the heat that spread across your body at his words, and you smiled, a hint of shyness in your expression — and he noticed immediately. He always did.
Without another word, he handed you the spoon, and you nodded in quiet "thanks", your gaze dropping to his lips for a second before you went back to mixing the dough.
You had hoped he couldn't feel your heart pounding in your chest.
"Y'know", Nicholas continued casually, his hands founding place on your hips as if they belonged there. You stayed silent, waiting for him to continue, instinctively leaning back against his chest. "We should go out sometime. There's this nice restaurant on the other side of town — I think you'd like it".
You gulped, trying your hardest to seem relaxed, but you could feel your muscles clenching, your mouth feeling dryer than usual. Yet you couldn't help the warmth that spread across your stomach. Was he...?
"Are you asking me out on a date?", you chuckled, turning around in his grasp, tilting your head so that you could have a look at him. He was so much taller than you, so much bigger — and you wondered if it wasn't one of the reasons why you fell for him in the first place. With your hands on Nicholas' chest, playing with the collar of his black t-shirt, you could feel his heart pound against your palms.
Nicholas laughed, although it sounded strained, almost forced, his grip on you tightening for a spare second. "Nah. I don't do this shit anymore. Just thought it would be nice to take you there".
With a hint of hesitation, you met his gaze, your smile dropping almost in time with your heart sinking in your chest. You bit the inside of your mouth, desperately trying not to show how much his words affected you — but they did. And he noticed. Sometimes you felt as if he knew you better than you knew yourself, looking right through you as if you were invisible. And you hated yourself for letting him get to you in such ways. You hated yourself for holding your heart out on your sleeve, and you hated him for breaking it again, again... and again.
"Um... yeah. I don't know. You might as well take someone else", you whispered, fixing the wrinkles on his shirt before slipping out of his grasp, turning away without another word. Your throat felt dry, and you struggled to keep your composure, feeling as if you were punched in the gut.
Were you overreacting? Maybe. Were you still hoping he might feel the same way and was just really, really good at hiding it? Definitely.
"I don't want to go with anyone else", he urged, trying to get closer to you again, the warmth of his body surrounding you, almost suffocating now. Although his words made your heart race, blush creeping up onto your face, you didn't let him get any closer. You knew his touch would hurt. And you knew you couldn't allow him to hurt you anymore.
"Nicholas, I can't do this", you mumbled. Not once had he seen you cry — and you weren't going to let him. Your voice was confident, not shaking even once, as you turned towards him, your hard gaze unfaltering, even though his disappointed expression made your heart break just a little. "You're crossing a line. Weren't you the one who made those stupid rules? Weren't you the one who wanted— wanted for it to be nothing more than a good fuck once in a while? Look what's happening to us", you babbled, even though with every word you said, your heart sunk deeper into your chest. It hurt to say it out loud, but you had to face the truth — you crossed a line. Maybe it was all fun and games to him, but it wasn't to you. Not anymore.
Nicholas seemed to be taken aback by your sudden outburst. He stepped back, as if being this close to you caused him physical pain.
He stayed quiet for a while. You could hear your own heartbeat in the quietness of the kitchen as you watched him, waiting for him to say something. Anything.
"You're right. We shouldn't", he nodded, meeting your gaze with a hint of hesitation. "Which doesn't mean I'm gonna stop kissing you. It's the one rule I want to keep on breaking— If you let me".
You let a small smile tug at the corners of your lips, your eyes softening. Nicholas, noticing the change in your expression, stepped closer again, caging you between his body and the kitchen counter, his hands finding place on your cheeks, as if they belonged there.
"I'd rather die than to stop kissing you", he whispered, pushing a strand of your untamed hair behind your ear. Your breath hitched, and you clutched his shirt between your fingers, as if to ground yourself to the moment.
You wanted to tell him everything. How much you'd grown to love him, how safe you felt in his arms, how you wanted to be something more than just a friend to him. But you didn't. Instead, you stepped on your tiptoes to press a soft, loving peck to his lips, hoping it'd say what you didn't dare to.
You let the smoke leave your mouth, watching it swirl in the air only to dissipate seconds later. The rain was now pouring down from the sky, and you wanted to laugh at the irony of the situation. You shivered, hugging yourself tighter, not even caring about the dampness of your clothes and the raindrops falling down your forehead, messing up your perfectly done makeup.
The sound of the door creaking open caught you off guard — not so many people knew about the backside of the bar, and you'd hoped it would stay this way. You tilted your head, your eyes narrowing in hopes to catch a glimpse of the person that had, unknowingly, disturbed the one moment of peace you had in a long time. The last person you'd expect to see, though, was Nicholas. He looked stupidly handsome in a black, skin-tight shirt, worn out jeans and some white sneakers, and you hated him for it.
Your heart dropped to your stomach when you realised he wasn't alone.
A loud, annoyingly sweet and high-pitched laugh echoed through the silence, along with the already familiar clicking of the girl's heels against the concrete pavement. You hoped that somehow, he wouldn't notice you; God, how badly you wished you could become invisible for a moment. You blinked rapidly, keeping your composure, even though you could feel your heart pounding against your ribs. With narrowed eyes, you looked her up and down, almost rolling them as you noticed her leaning against Nicholas' shoulder for balance as she kept on giggling. She was completely drunk, but Nicholas, on the other hand, seemed sober. His hand rested on her waist, slowly guiding her down the steps, keeping quiet as she tripped over her feet clumsily, laughing loudly. The urge to roll your eyes was too strong, now, as you balled up against the wall, partially trying to hide under your jacket, your knees pulled to your chest, your knuckles turning white as you gripped on the wet ground beneath you.
As they got closer, you couldn't help but feel your heart race, knowing there was nowhere to hide. You sighed, hastily taking a puff of your cigarette, losing count of how many you've already smoked. You had hoped he wouldn't notice you through the wall of rain, that he'd walk past you as if you didn't exist. You shifted on the ground, your head dropping back against the wall as you stared up at the clouded sky, exhaling the smoke into the damp air. You tried your best to seem relaxed, but you couldn't help the tears brimming in the corners of your eyes — your breathing getting heavier the closer they got.
The world seemed to stop spinning for a second when you met Nicholas' gaze. Surprise was written all over his face, replaced by concern as soon as he realised you were soaking wet, out in the open rain. You smacked your glossy lips together, your eyes falling to the ground as you heard him approach you with a few, long steps.
"Y/N? What— what are you doing here?", he said softly, crouching down next to you, forgetting about the girl he left with. You didn't look at him right away; you knew you couldn't. Your bottom lip trembled slightly as you took a puff of your cigarette, staring at the ground blankly — wishing a black hole would come crashing down and swallow you whole.
"Hey, are you okay? Wanna go in—".
"I'm fine, Nicholas", you interrupted mid sentence, finally finding courage to look him in the eyes. His brows were slightly furrowed, concern written all over his face as he carefully studied you, gulping. You had never called him Nicholas before. It was always Nic, Nico, or even Chavez if you were being playful. The sound of his full name falling from your lips was so unfamiliar, it sent shivers down his spine. You took a deep breath, stubbing the remains of your cigarette out slowly. "Don't keep your company waiting".
For a second, he seemed confused, as if he forgot about the person he left with in the first place. He turned his head, watching the girl as she sat on the bench, swinging her legs in the air happily, mumbling nonsense. You rolled your eyes and snarled, moving to get up from the ground — your ass felt sore, you were soaked, and you wanted to get Nicholas out of your sight as soon as possible.
"I'm just driving her home", he explained, stepping closer towards you as you hastily stood up, wrapping your jacket tighter around you.
"Nicholas, I don't care", the coldness again. "It's certainly none of my concern. You seemed to be pretty close, though", you couldn't help but chuckle, shaking your head.
"It's not like that", he groaned, quickly getting irritated at the indifference in your voice and in your eyes. You bit back a sigh, instead rolling your eyes, fixing your damp hair in hopes to tame it, make yourself look better than you felt. "Let me drive you home. We can talk about it, yeah?".
You found yourself shaking your head before he could even finish the sentence, taking a step back to put some distance between the two of you. Nicholas couldn't help but let his eyes roam over your soaked form, how absolutely beautiful you looked, even when drenched in the open rain.
"No, Nicholas. It's better if I go on my own", you stepped back when he tried to reach for you, as if his touch would set you on fire. "We—", you pointed your finger towards him and then you again, "we don't work. We're done. You hear me? I— I can't".
You hated the way your voice trembled, but you were sure of what you wanted. You knew you couldn't have it, and no matter how much it hurt, you had to protect your heart. Maybe it was too late, though — when you looked into his eyes, wide and pleading, as if asking you not to let go — you weren't so sure you could.
"What do you mean 'we're done'?", he asked carefully, running a hand through his messy locks, staring at you like a lost puppy.
"I meant exactly that. You're fucking kissing another girl in there and— you broke the fucking rule. The one that was so fucking important to you in the first place!", you snarled, barely able to control your anger and sorrow anymore. Your heart felt as if it was going to explode, and you took a deep, painful breath, leaning back against the wall in hopes to calm yourself down.
He knew you were serious. He could see it in your eyes, in the way you carried yourself tonight. And he wanted to slam his head against the wall, because he did all of this to get your attention. Maybe he had expected you to end up tangled in his sheets after a mind-blowing make up sex — but he didn't expect you to give up on him. To give up on what you had.
"It's not like that, Y/N, just—".
"Fucking stop it, Nicholas!", you hissed, taking a step forward, tugging at the hem of your dress to pull it down your thighs. "I meant it. I— I'm fucking tired. Exhausted, even", you laughed, although you weren't amused. "I don't want to be one of your girls. It hurts".
You didn't wait for him to reply; you couldn't even look at him. Instead, you turned around, quickly disappearing in the thick rain that continued to pour from the dark sky.
He didn't come after you.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ♡
For the next week, you didn't see him.
Not that you wanted to — but the emptiness in your heart only deepened the more days passed by. You tried to get yourself busy, manoeuvring between work and taking extra assignments and getting with your friends in the weekends. No matter how hard you tried, though, the thought of him always lingered in the back of your mind.
It was Saturday evening, and you were getting ready to go out with your friends. You finished off your makeup by putting a lipgloss on, smacking your lips together to spread it evenly. You couldn't help but feel your stomach hurl with excitement at the thought of going out, maybe meeting someone new, forgetting everything for a night.
As you stared out of your window and admired the panorama of New York, constantly living and breathing, you felt smaller than ever. The weight on your heart seemed to follow you everywhere, even if you tried to leave it in your pocket for just a few hours. You caught your own reflection in the thick glass, and you didn't even recognise who you were anymore. Maybe falling for Nicholas was the worst mistake you've ever made, but you couldn't deny he made you feel more alive than ever.
The tight, black, backless top you wore clung to your figure in the best way possible, your perky nipples just barely visible from underneath the thick material. Your thighs were almost fully exposed, a simple, black skirt ending just below your ass — it was so out of your comfort zone, but somehow, it made you feel better. Maybe you wanted to prove to everyone, including yourself, that you weren't thinking about him, that you got over the whole mess he'd recently put you through. You sighed heavily, looking out of the window as if the answers for all your doubts were written in the sky.
You fixed your hair, patiently waiting for the right time to leave. It was only beginning to get dark, the sunset creeping into the room casting golden shadows over your face. You couldn't help but wonder what Nicholas was up to — as you stared at the horizon, your hand wandered to the phone laying on your vanity. Maybe you had expected to see a message from him, a missed call; anything that would signal he still cared. Disappointment bloomed in your stomach when you were met with a few messages from your friends, a notification from Instagram and a reminder to take your daily dose of medicine. You rolled your eyes, annoyed, throwing the phone onto your bed before you shuffled towards the door.
A sudden, annoyingly loud sound of your doorbell caught you off guard. You hadn't expected any visitors tonight, neither were you waiting for a package or a letter. You could feel a lump in your throat as your feet moved on their own, guiding you towards the door slowly but surely. The feeling of uneasiness seemed to bloom in your stomach, as if you knew — or maybe, expected — exactly who was waiting at the door. The doorbell rang again, cutting through the silence like a knife, and you froze, your hand towering over the door handle.
You cursed the building's owner for not putting a viewfinder in the doors.
You turned the lock, wincing when your keychain rustled loudly, as if to inform the person on the other side that you were, indeed, home. You couldn't hide even if you wanted to, now — so, without a second thought, you opened the door.
Your breath got caught in your throat when you saw Nicholas. You cursed him for looking so stupidly good as you hastily looked him up and down. You sent him a glare, not saying a word, because... truthfully, there was nothing to say anymore. His gaze lingered on your boobs for a second longer than appropriate, before moving down, focusing on your exposed legs instead. He leaned against the doorframe nonchalantly, as if nothing ever happened, as if nothing between you changed.
"Going somewhere?", he mocked, inviting himself in, taking off his leather jacket as he went. The intoxicating smell of his cologne filled the room, wrapping around you like a comfortingly familiar blanket. You bit the inside of your mouth, not quite sure what to do, although you could feel your stomach tighten at his mere presence alone. Absolutely fucking pathetic.
"What are you doing here?", you asked carefully, keeping a safe distance as he entered your kitchen, moving around as if he owned the place. Nicholas didn't answer right away — instead he took a cup from the cupboard, pouring himself some orange juice, his movements slow and deliberate. You felt your cheeks heat up; his arrogant carelessness making annoyance bloom low in your stomach. "I said we're fucking done, Nicholas. Why do you act like a fucking child? Why the fuck are you even here?".
He leaned against the kitchen counter, clearly indifferent to your anger. A small smirk played on his lips as he took a small sip of the juice, tapping his fingers against the countertop. Your gaze lingered on his hand for longer than necessary, but your expression stayed neutral, your arms crossed on your chest as if to protect yourself from his effortless charm.
"This is good— Where'd you buy it?", Nicholas asked, clearly unbothered by the glares you sent his way. You rolled your eyes; the barely concealed anger began to overcome you, and you clenched your fists in order to calm the storm going on in your head.
"It's a fucking orange juice", you muttered, shaking your head, your eyes squeezed shut in disbelief. "Why are we having this conversation right now, I mean— Are you for fucking real?" you stuttered, irritated but not quite sure what to do, how to get rid of him. "Nicholas, go away. I've got somewhere to be".
He met your gaze, and for the first time that night, he wasn't wearing that arrogant smirk, his expression dropping a little as he carefully studied you. As much as you felt confident about the way you looked, you couldn't help but sink into the ground as his dark gaze lingered on your legs for longer than needed. Nicholas raised his eyebrows, almost as if he was judging your choice of clothing, a mocking, playful smile making its way onto his lips.
"I'm sure your girlfriends will be fine", he licked his lips, putting the — now empty — cup in the sink before walking off in the direction of your room nonchalantly.
You had no other choice but to follow, your feet shuffling against the wooden floor agonisingly slow as you stared at his back blankly. And you absolutely hated the way your heart fluttered at the sight of his muscles clenching as he walked.
"Yeah, they will. I'm not going out with them", you rasped, feeling a lump starting to form in your throat as you walked past Nicholas, plopping on your bed — just now realising he wasn't planning on leaving anytime soon. You didn't meet his gaze, instead focusing on fixing the crinkles on your fluffy blanket. You saw Nicholas move from the corner of your eye; his brown, attentive eyes narrowed slightly as he leaned against the doorframe, his arms folded over his chest.
"Then who are going out with?", he asked slowly and lowly, curious yet scared of the answer. His tone left you no choice but to look at him sheepishly, fluttering your lashes as you bit the inside of your mouth. You knew exactly where this was going, and it meant one thing and one thing only: trouble.
"I'm meeting someone, Nicholas. It's none of your concern anyway, so I'd appreciate it if you—".
"No. You're not doing that", Nicholas chuckled, although there was no humour in his tone at all — his voice an almost animalistic hiss, dripping with venom. You rose up to your feet, anger and annoyance blooming in your chest as you let his words sink in. You sent him a glare, just now noticing how dark his eyes became. He was breathing heavily, leaning against the doorframe, trapping you inside, giving you no choice but to stay where you were.
You turned on your feet, walking to the window only to stare at the New York panorama; you could practically hear the roar of the city through the thin glass, making your heart ache with longing. It was supposed to be a fun night — you were supposed to forget about him, just for one night, maybe meet someone new. Yet there he was, trapping you inside your own apartment as if you were a prisoner.
"How comes you tell me what to fucking do?", you snapped, turning around only to face him again. You couldn't control your anger anymore, not even if you tried — his arrogant smirk only spurring you on, causing you to close the distance between you in a few, big steps.
"I just want you to fucking leave me alone. I don't want to see you, I don't want to listen to anything you say. You can go back to being a man whore now — don't let me hold you back anymore", you snarled, pushing him back in hopes to get him to listen, just for once. Your breath was heavy as you watched Nicholas straighten his posture, pushing himself off the wall swiftly. His smirk vanished, and so did your confidence as he towered over you, almost making you feel nauseous. You swallowed hard, instinctively taking a step back to increase the distance between you, your face feeling stiff as you watched his dangerous expression.
"Don't you dare talk to me like that", he hissed, his tone leaving you no room to protest. Your throat felt dry as you chuckled lowly, shaking your head in disbelief.
"Big, dangerous Nicholas. All you do is fucking talk", you chuckled again, one of your hands moving up only to tap his cheek lightly, as if he was a little boy. Your voice was sharp, but there was a light edge to it — a challenge. Nicholas' gaze dropped to your lips, his jaw tight as he watched an amused smirk appear on your face. "You're a fucking asshole, and I want nothing to do with you. You had already made your choice. Now, get the fuck out".
He didn't move. Neither did you. You'd wondered what he'd do next — if he'd listen to you, just this one time, or if he'd kill you right on the spot. The anticipation made your heart race, your hands shaking nervously, arms falling limp by your sides.
Just as you were about to move, to break the thick silence by shuffling to the door, Nicholas hand clamped down on your neck, cutting your airflow in one, swift movement.
You gasped when you met his gaze — his pupils completely blown out, swallowing the darkness of his irises; brows furrowed as he studied your face, the corner of his mouth turning up at the look of fear on your face. He really did find the whole situation amusing, meanwhile you struggled against him, trying to free yourself from the bruising grip he had on you.
"Say that again", he hissed lowly, leaning down so that he could be face to face with you. His eyes remained serious, although a small smirk made its way onto his face as he watched you wince and grip his forearm in order to free yourself. You knew Nicholas would never hurt you, but the way he looked at you sent shiver down your spine. The feelings you tried to bury deep inside your heart came flooding back — no matter how hard you tried, you just couldn't shake them.
You took a shallow breath, gulping audibly when Nicholas brought you closer by your neck, his lips now millimetres away from yours. He tilted his head, studying your face as if he could see right through you — as if he could sense the longing for him that you so desperately tried to hide. His eyes remained cold, and you felt his hot breath against your cheek, your face growing warmer with each passing second.
"I fucking hate you", you spat, your voice strangled due to the pressure his hand put on your neck. The more you said it, the less you believed that's how you truly felt. Your words were filled with venom, but there was also an unmistakable crack to your voice that defeated you. A small chuckle erupted from Nicholas' chest — and you knew you had already lost the battle you unknowingly fought in your head.
"Mhm. And you aren't... jealous of me? You didn't look so happy about my little company last weekend", he snarled, letting go of your neck only to bring you closer by your hips, his fingers pressing into your skin with unspoken possessiveness. You took a deep breath, your hands rubbing the sore skin he just let go of, your eyes squinting as a soft laugh escaped your parted lips. You shook your head. The audacity of men.
"What do you want me to say? It was not a part of the deal. You broke the rules of our little arrangement, but when it comes to me seeing other people, suddenly it's a problem?", you snapped, putting your hands on his chest to at least put some distance between the two of you. You weren't sure if you wanted to cry or to laugh. "Who the fuck do you think you are, Nicholas?".
For a second, it seemed as if he was speechless. His mouth opened and closed as if he was a god damn fish — words dying in his throat as he watched you with an unfaltering expression. You huffed, pushing him back until his hands fell from your hips to stupidly swing by his sides. "You're pathetic. Get out. I won't repeat myself".
Your throat burned with the things you wanted to say — how much you hated him for how he played you; how badly he hurt you; how madly you've fallen for him. Instead, you just watched as he took a deep breath, collecting himself, his gaze lowering to the ground as if he wasn't sure what to say.
After a few seconds, that felt like an eternity, you heard him shuffle towards the door. Your heart ached, and you weren't quite sure why — you wanted him to leave. He listened to you, just for once, and for some reason, all you wanted to do was yell: "stay". You mindlessly toyed with your fingers, watching as his hand towered over the doorknob, hesitating just for a second.
"I don't share".
Nicholas' voice came out as barely a whisper, and if it wasn't for the gravelly silence, you wouldn't even catch it. Your eyes almost fell out of your head, you could hear your own heartbeat in the quietness of the room — you were almost convinced Nicholas could, too.
"W-what?", your voice came out an octave higher than you'd anticipated, making you want to slam your head against the wall. You watched Nicholas' back as he stood still, his head tilting just slightly to give you a side-eyed look.
"You heard me", he growled, much louder this time, before slowly turning towards you, as if you were his prey. His gaze landed on you, confident and serious, catching you off guard. You momentarily forgotten about every insult you wanted to call him — your hands clutched in fists by your sides, the all-familiar heat filling your stomach as it hurled with need. "You are not going to see anyone else. You're mine, whether you like it or not".
You blinked slowly, watching as Nicholas got closer again. The room suddenly got smaller, the air around you thicker. Your head shot up as he towered over you, giving you no room to protest before leaning down and pressing his lips against yours.
You wanted to protest — hit him, slap him in the face, get a reaction out of him; humiliate him just as he did you so many times. Yet all you could do was stand there, your feet planted into the floor, and you couldn't move; couldn't react. Your eyes closed involuntarily, your heart beating out of your chest as you obeyed him; what other choice did you have? Lying to yourself was much better than facing the undeniable truth — you wanted this. You wanted to get a reaction out of him, to provoke him, watch him break and fight for whatever you two had. And, based on the way he pulled you closer by your hips, pressing against you as if he didn't want to let go — it definitely worked.
You desperately kissed him back, unable to hide what you truly wanted no more — your hands tangling in his hair, tugging at the strands with a little too much force than you anticipated. You felt Nicholas' mocking smile against your lips, a soft groan that you oh, missed so dearly leaving his mouth when he felt the harsh sting on his scalp. The pain only seemed to fuel him further, his fingers digging into your waist as if he wanted to leave bruises there — claiming you as his for anyone else to see. Your breaths mingled together, short and shallow, as you devoured each other as if it was the last thing you were going to do. Your mouth parted in an involuntary moan when Nicholas pulled on your bottom lip with his teeth, his greedy touch hurriedly backing you against the window.
As soon as your bare back made contact with the cool glass, a shiver ran down your spine — an involuntary squeak leaving your throat, being swallowed by his greedy lips on yours. Nicholas wouldn't let you breathe, putting all of his gathered anger, annoyance and lust into the kiss, making sure you could feel him all over you.
"You drive me fucking insane", he breathed out, slipping his knee between your legs just as his lips began to travel down your throat, biting the sensitive skin there, soothing the pain with his tongue immediately after. Your head was thrown back, eyes rolling back into your head, your nails raking through his messy curls to ground yourself in any way you could. "Still hate me?".
You let out a breathless chuckle that quickly turned into a moan — Nicholas' breath tickled your collarbone, his mouth working on your sensitive skin as if he couldn't get enough.
"More than ever", you choked out, pulling his head up so that you could reconnect your lips, already missing the addicting taste of his mouth. Your tongue parted his lips, and Nicholas groaned lowly, the sound bubbling in his throat as he greedily kissed you back. No matter how hard you tried to keep your guard up, to push him away and slap him across his stupidly handsome face — you couldn't bring yourself to do so. Maybe it was the way his hands roamed up and down your sides, squeezing your skin as if he was scared you'd slip away; or maybe it was the smell, taste, warmth of him on your body. There was no denying he was the only one that could make you feel this good — and he barely even started.
So you allowed him to do whatever he pleased.
One of Nicholas' hands travelled all over your side, lifting the hem of your little top as it moved up your stomach slowly, teasingly. His long, thick fingers brushed against your skin, causing goosebumps to erupt all over your body, shiver running down your spine. Nicholas reached the bottom of your bare boobs, and a deep groan left his mouth when you arched into his touch.
"No bra?", he chuckled lowly, pulling away to look into your eyes. "You're such a slut. You were ready to jump into a random guy's bed, weren't you?".
You were unable to reply. Anger bubbled in your chest, your cheeks growing warm as you sent him a glare through your lashes.
"Says you. A literal definition of a man whore", you rolled your eyes, your nails raking down his shirt—covered chest. Nicholas' eyes hardened as he stared down at you, his hand on your hip tightening in an almost painful grip. His nails dig into your skin as he pulled you closer, his other hand pulling on the hem of your shirt to lift it up; your boobs spilling out of the tight fabric almost immediately.
You gasped when your overheated skin got exposed to the cold air. Your nipples hardened under Nicholas' dark eyes, and you watched as he run his tongue along his bottom lip, clearly impressed by the reaction he managed to get out of you. You fought the urge to wet your lips as you watched him, anticipation blooming deep in your stomach.
Nicholas' breath tickled your lips as he finally met your gaze again. He smirked down at you, somehow pressing you harder against the cool glass, the grip he had on your hip unforgiving.
"Yet you keep on coming back. Why the fuck do you keep on coming back?", he groaned against your lips, his hand finally meeting the soft skin of your breast. Nicholas watched as your back arched off the glass, your eyes threatening to close as he squeezed your boob harshly, the feeling of his palm against your nipple heavenly.
You stifled a whine that wanted to erupt from your throat. Instead, you gripped Nicholas' broad shoulders — your long, manicured nails digging into his skin as you desperately tried to maintain your composure. Your mouth parted, and a prolonged, desperate breath left you before you could stop it.
"I don't know", you swallowed loudly; your lips brushed against Nicholas' as you spoke, his eyes melting into yours with intensity that left you breathless. He chuckled, tilting his head slightly; a playful, teasing smile played on his lips as he tugged on your nipple with his forefinger and thumb, catching you off guard. You moaned, your whole body reacting to his all-too-familiar touch as a shiver run down your spine. Nicholas cursed under his breath, his bottom lip getting caught between his teeth as he carefully studied your face.
"You're not a good liar. Just admit it. You know I can make you feel better than anyone. You know you're mine. You know I'm yours, baby".
You let out a shaky breath you didn't realise you were holding, your eyes locking with his — the weight of the unspoken words heaved on your shoulders, making it impossible for you to think straight. You let your head fall back against the window as you desperately tried to put some distance between the two of you. The hand playing with your breast moved down your body, reaching the bottom of your thigh before he hooked your leg around his waist.
"Nicholas—", you choked out, your lashes fluttering as you looked up at him, your tongue darting out to wet your dry lips. He hummed lowly, squeezing the soft skin of your thigh before his hand slipped under the hem of your skirt.
"Tell me to leave, and I will", he whispered, his fingertips gently rubbing against your sensitive inner-thigh, once again making you gulp. "Say it, Y/N. What do you want?".
Nicholas shifted closer, his face now inches away from yours, his eyes boring into yours with intensity that made your breath hitch in your throat. You knew you should tell him to leave, to make him feel like he made you plenty of times before. Your voice died in your throat, and before you knew it, you were kissing him again.
You were tired of acting like you didn't want him. You were tired of the sleepless nights you spent thinking about this exact moment. Your hands moved down Nicholas' chest, slipping under his shirt to brush against his well-defined stomach. Your leg against his waist tightened, and so did Nicholas' grip on your thigh as he groaned into your mouth, his hips tightly pressed against your inner thigh.
"I want you, Nic. All of you. I want it so fucking bad it hurts", you breathed into his mouth before sucking his bottom lip lewdly, your hips rocking against his thigh securely pressed between your legs. You tugged on the hem of his shirt, silently asking Nicholas to take it off, and he obeyed. You barely broke the kiss as he lifted it over his head, throwing it onto the floor carelessly. You could feel the hardness of his erection press against your bare skin, the rough material of his jeans grinding against your thigh.
"Then take me", he groaned into your mouth, his voice filled with urgency. His hips snapped forward, experimentally grinding into your thigh, letting you feel just how ready he was for you. You mewled like a frightened kitten, the adrenaline pumping in your veins, your heart feeling as if it could jump out of your chest. Your body betrayed how you truly felt, your pelvis snapping towards Nicholas, as if you couldn't bare being away from him. "Claim me as yours for everyone else to see".
Your head was spinning, and his words didn't help with the burning sensation spreading across your stomach. The closer Nicholas' hand got to your clothed centre, the more your back arched off the window, your erect nipples rubbing against his bare chest. More moans slipped past your lips, and you didn't hold them back — you couldn't, even if you tried. With the little strength you had left, you pushed him back, leaving him no choice but to fall on your bed. It creaked in protest at Nicholas' weight, but he only chuckled, eyeing you up and down hungrily. He leaned back on his elbows, his feet dangling off the mattress as he patiently waited for your next move. His obedience was surprising — but not unpleasant. With a newfound confidence, you made your way towards him, your hair falling over your shoulders in a way that had Nicholas' breath hitch. His pupils were dilated, chest heaving as he inhaled sharply, watching you with a lopsided smile.
Slowly and teasingly, you pulled your top over your head, throwing it onto the ground, standing by the side of the bed now half-naked. A shiver run down your spine as Nicholas sat up, his face now centimetres away from your chest, his dark eyes staring up at you intensely.
"Take this off", he ordered, pointing towards your little skirt, his tone leaving no room to protest; not that you wanted to. Your hands were shaky as you hastily reached for the waistband of your skirt, looking down at him for approval — it was incredible how much power he held over you, even when you were on top, standing before him; towering over him. Slowly, you tugged on the zipper, feeling the fabric loosen against your waist before falling to the floor with a soft thump. Your heart raced in your chest as you stepped out of the skirt, leaving you almost fully exposed before Nicholas' hungry eyes.
In an instant, his hands were on you, as if he couldn't bare not touching you for a second longer. Your chest heaved with uneven breaths, your knees buckling as Nicholas' hands found place on your thighs, pulling you closer towards the edge of the bed. His eyes roamed down your body, taking in every single detail, that, in his eyes, made you perfect. He eyed the skimpy, black thong that covered your most intimate part, his eyes glimmering in the dim light, as if he couldn't believe you were real.
"You're so fucking hot", he groaned, tugging on the waistband of your underwear before letting it snap against your skin. You hissed, grounding yourself with your hands on his chiselled shoulders, uncontrollably moving closer towards him.
"Those fucking tits of yours," Nicholas groaned, throwing his head back dramatically, his hands moving down your sides only to rest on your hips. He licked his lips; his dark, penetrative eyes gazed right back at you, causing your chest to heave with uneven breaths. "They're perfect. You're perfect. And all mine, aren't you?" he growled, not once looking away from you as his tongue darted out, swirling around your left nipple with undeniable precision. You threw your head back, your back arching into his mouth, hearing Nicholas groan into your flesh. He wrapped his arms around your waist, pushing you plush against him as if he didn't need to breathe, as if he wanted to lose himself completely in you. He kissed the valley between your boobs, biting the sensitive skin there, his attentive eyes following your every reaction.
"Yours— All yours, Nick", you whined, words dying in your throat as his hands travelled down your back, over the curve of your ass, squeezing your buttcheeks roughly, pushing your pelvis towards him.
His nails dig into your skin, making you let out an involuntary moan, your fingers raking through his hair, toying with the soft strands.
"That's my girl", Nicholas' voice was filled with pride, and a prolonged sigh left his mouth, as if this moment was everything he dreamed about. His eyes looked up at you, filled with raw need, his pupils completely blown out, swallowing his irises fully. You gulped at the praise, looking down at him with flushed cheeks and pounding heart. Nicholas licked a long stripe up your sternum, leaving your skin burning and glistening under his hungry gaze.
Slowly and deliberately, his hands moved up and down your sides, caressing your soft skin with an almost gentle care, as if he tried to memorise how your flesh felt against his fingertips. His lips moved down your body, lingering on your ribs, leaving pecks as he went. The occasional glide of his tongue against your skin left you trembling, your knees bucking under the immerse pleasure as they hit the bed frame. Nicholas' big hands kept you upright, guiding you to straddle his lap, and you obediently did so. With your legs now on both sides of his thick thighs and with the flames licking your insides, you tugged on Nicholas' hair, tilting his head towards you, meeting his gaze with a small smile. His eyes were half-lidded, Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed, the sting on his scalp only adding to his arousal. You could feel his cock press into your clothed centre, straining against his pants, practically begging to be freed. With a sly smile, you tested the waters, grinding your hips back and fourth against him, causing a small whine to escape from his throat.
"You're mine", you murmured, brushing your lips against his; just enough to feel the heat radiating off him, his eyes locking with yours as he nodded. You tutted, tugging on his strands tighter, "Nuh-uh. Not good enough. Say it".
Your voice left no room to protest. Nicholas gulped, his hands grounding you on his erection, pushing you down with enough force to make you hum. "I'm all yours, Y/N. Always had been", he inhaled sharply, bucking his hips up to meet you halfway. The connection between you was almost palpable, knocking the breath out of your lungs, causing your chest to heave with every sharp intake of breath. You've never felt more alive than then; on Nicholas' lap, with his attentive eyes on your face like you were the only one that mattered. You scratched the soft skin behind his ears, your thumbs rubbing soft circles onto his cheeks as you leaned down to kiss him again. This time, you took things slow, savouring the taste of him on the tip of your tongue, feeling his hands on your ass, guiding you to rut against his clothed arousal. Your moans were breathless and swallowed by Nicholas' mouth as he eagerly swirled his tongue around yours, one of his indecisive hands travelling up your back to tangle in your hair.
You were right where you were supposed to.
"Fuck me", Nicholas chuckled lowly as you pulled away, moving down to nib and kiss his defined jaw, feeling his soft stubble scratch your skin as you did. You grinned against his skin, pushing him down to make him lay flat on the bed, and he obeyed, taking you with him as he went. Your hair fell on your face as you towered over him, your palms flat on both sides of his head. Slowly and sensually, you leaned down, pushing your hair out of the way to press a lingering kiss on the side of Nicholas' neck. He groaned — the sound vibrated against your lips as you licked a stripe up his throat, biting the sensitive spot under his jaw that you knew made him squirm each time. Nicholas' hands guided you, pressing you flat against his chest with a tight grip on your ass, his hips snapping upwards in search of any kind of friction he could get. Your appreciative hums were muffled by his skin as you sucked, bit and kissed on every inch you could reach, slowly moving down towards his chest.
"Mark me up for everyone to see", Nicholas choked out, his grip on your ass almost painful, now, as he used it for leverage to grind his cock into your pussy. You moaned shamelessly at his words, feeling fireworks erupt in your stomach as the adrenaline took over. You flicked your tongue against his prominent collarbone, sucking hickeys into his tan skin, pressing kisses on every beauty mark adorning his chest you could find.
By the time you were satisfied with your work, Nicholas was a groaning mess underneath you. His spit-covered skin glistened under the city lights creeping into the room, the contours of his face even more prominent now. Purple marks adorned the sides of his neck, collarbones and the column of his throat — you felt a rush of joy fill your heart at the sight. The thought of him being so obviously marked by you made your heart race, and, with a satisfied smile, you gently run your fingertips over the love bites you left just below Nicholas' collarbone.
"Beautiful", you mumbled, tilting your head slightly, watching as a wide, dazed smile made its way onto Nicholas' face. You felt him throb underneath you, his patience slipping with every second; and, just as you thought about how good he was doing under your control, he flipped you over.
Your back hit the soft mattress, Nicholas' face inches away from yours as he crawled in between your legs, spreading them wider on both sides of his defined hips. His hands slowly travelled up your body, memorising each curve of your body; unrelenting gaze following every reaction he managed to get out of you. The feeling of his breath against your lips made you dizzy, and your back arched off the mattress in desperate search of friction that he wasn't granting you. Your nipples rubbed against his chest, and you clawed on his defined shoulders as his fingers towered over the waistband of your thong, just barely brushing over your sensitive skin.
An uninvited shudder ran down your spine as you met Nicholas' gaze again. He slid the thong down your legs, slowly, delicately, almost as if he was afraid he'd break you if he pressed too hard. Nicholas chuckled lowly, throwing your damp underwear on the floor with a little care, leaning back to look at your — now exposed — pussy.
One of his hands reached up, cupping your breast for a second, long enough to make you arch against him, before it moved up, wrapping around your throat. Nicholas' grip was firm and tight enough to make you deliciously lightheaded, and you gasped, feeling a strong sting on the side of your ass.
"Such a dirty fuckin' girl. You're soaking", he cooed, the previous softness in his gaze nowhere to be found. All you could see was the all consuming darkness and lust, drifting just below the surface, ready to be freed. "You've been dying to have my cock inside you, weren't you?".
You tried your best to nod, but it was nearly impossible when he pressed his thumb against your pulse point, sending you a dirty, open-mouthed smirk that made your stomach hurl. Another spank against the side of your ass, and your legs were tightening around Nicholas' hips, your own grinding into the air in search of any kind of relief.
He clicked his tongue, clearly enjoying the control he had over you. Your jaw was slack, every muscle in your body tense as you waited, obediently leaning down against the pillows, your limp arms falling on both sides of your head.
"Want me to make you feel good, baby?", he asked, grinning when you tried to nod again, his grip on your throat tightening just barely. White dots erupted in front of your eyes, your chest tightening due to the lack of air in your lungs, feeling as if you could pass out any second now. With the last ounce of power you had, you gripped Nicholas' forearm, your nails digging into his skin with enough force to leave marks. Your pussy clenched around nothing, practically begging to be touched, to be taken care of, your body now shaking in Nicholas' tight grasp.
You gasped abruptly as his hand loosened around your throat, finally giving you room to breathe. Instead, it travelled down your body, exploring every inch, every curve. Nicholas leaned down again just as his fingers brushed over your pussy — the touch feather-like, but enough to make you rasp for more.
"Nick", you choked out, reaching out for him, raking your nails down his back. Nicholas' other arm was outstretched beside your head, keeping him upright as he towered over you, once again leaning down to barely graze your bottom lip with his teeth. "Shit, I need you. Need you so bad".
Your voice came out strangled, but you didn't care; you weren't afraid to beg him for what you wanted. Any ounce of self-control left you whenever he was close, but you didn't mind. He set your insides on fire like no one else could.
When Nicholas licked his lips, smiling cruelly before pressing the two of his fingers against your clit, all you could do was gasp. He knew exactly what to do with his fingers and how to use them, circling your sensitive bud as if you were the only thing that mattered. He hissed through his teeth, clicking his tongue as your jaw dropped, brows furrowing as quiet moans escaped you.
"So wet f'me, fuck", he mused, his lips ghosting over your jaw just as two of his fingers slipped inside your tight hole. You cried out, nails digging into his forearm resting beside your head as it fell back against the sheets. You clenched around his digits as he pushed them as deep as they could go, burying them inside you; curling them upwards to get more sweet moans out of your swollen lips. Your eyes rolled back into your head, chest heaving with uneven breaths as Nicholas' breath tickled your ear, his teeth grazing your lobe teasingly. "So fuckin' tight. Just squeezing my fingers", he chuckled darkly. His voice sent shiver down your spine, and you found yourself reaching for him, your hands roaming over his chest, arms and shoulders as if you couldn't bear being away from him. The feeling of his fingers buried deep within your walls combined with the feeling of Nicholas' hard, muscular body on top of you was almost too much, and you were choking on your breath, almost embarrassed by how quickly he made you lose control.
That's when he started to pump his digits in and out of you, keeping his movements slow and steady, a memorable gasp leaving your throat every time his palm met your stiff clit. Your eyes were wide and glossy, mouth wide agape as you tried to speak, signal how good he made you feel; except that you didn't have to. Nicholas could see it, feel it, God, even hear it. The wet, squelching noise filled the silence as he pumped his fingers in and out of you, hitting that special spot that had you seeing stars, your thighs threatening to close around his forearm.
"Shit, Nick, oh my fucking God", you cried out just as your hips rose off the mattress, bucking into his hand greedily, as if you couldn't get enough. Nicholas chuckled, his breath warm against your skin as he trailed kisses down the side of your neck, his skilled tongue flicking against your collarbone teasingly.
"Yes, baby, you're doing so good f'me", he cooed, mouth moving up your body only to reconnect your lips hastily. You moaned into the kiss, barely able to kiss him back as your stomach tightened; his fingers working in and out of your cunt, his thumb rubbing tight circles on your clit. "Such a good fucking girl. You wanna cum f'me? Wanna soak my fucking hand, hmm? Fucking say it", he growled against your lips, leaning back just enough to wrap his free hand around your neck again. You gasped, barely able to obtain the whimpers that continued to leave your mouth, and you were already there—
"Wanna cum for you, want it s'bad", you choked out, meeting his demanding gaze with a hint of desperation in your own. You clenched down on his fingers, your walls throbbing as you wailed, back arching off the bed. "Shit, shit, shit! Please, let me cum, Nick—".
He smiled cruelly before pulling his fingers out of your tight cunt, your walls clamping down on them as if to prevent him from leaving. You cried out, tears brimming in the corner of your eyes as your stomach tightened, hips rising off the mattress in search of his addicting touch again — but to no avail.
"Not quite good enough, baby", he snarled, pulling you up by your neck, positioning you so that you could sit upright, now facing him. Before you could say something, beg him to please let you cum this time, he tapped two of his soaked fingers against your lower lip. "Suck. Let's see if I trained you well".
Your jaw went slack, eyes clouded with lust, and you obeyed, your tongue lolling out of your mouth to eagerly lap at his digits, tasting yourself. Nicholas chuckled, clearly amused by your obedience, pushing his fingers into your mouth, the hand on your neck loosening just slightly. You hollowed your cheeks, running your tongue in between his fingers, bobbing your head the same you'd do if it was his cock in your mouth. Without a second thought and clearly growing impatient, he thrusted all the way in until you choked on his fingers, moaning like a bitch in heat, whimpering and trying your best to breathe through your nose. You looked up at Nicholas through your lashes and you met his gaze, dark and filled with longing so strong it made your heart race.
With a satisfied smile, he pulled out — a string of saliva connecting you to his fingers, and you smacked your lips together, already toying with the waistband of his pants, impatient.
"How'd I do?", you panted, slowly pulling the fabric down Nicholas' legs, along with his black boxers, not once looking away from his face. His thumb brushed against your cheek in an almost loving manner, a gentle, sweet smile adoring his lips. The fire in his gaze made your head spin, and you slowly positioned him to lay down on the bed — and he did, not before throwing his underwear on the floor carelessly.
"Fuckin' perfect. Come on, sit on my face, baby", he groaned, and you couldn't help but bite back a whimper, staring at him all doe-eyed, blinking slowly. You obeyed, crawling up his body until you straddled his hard chest, your pussy clenching and unclenching at the sight underneath you. When you moved higher, he stopped you with a quick flick of his hand. "Nuh-uh. Turn around, baby. You're gonna suck my cock like a fuckin' whore you are, right?".
And so you did, nodding obediently. You clumsily straddled Nicholas' face, falling forward as his tongue licked a stripe from the clit to your tight hole immediately. He didn't wait a second, grabbing your ass tightly to push you down onto his face as if he didn't need to breathe, as if he was starved and you were the only one that could satisfy his hunger. Your hips rocked down onto his face, your shaky hands already reaching out to wrap around his reddened cock, your mouth watering at the sight of it alone.
Nicholas groaned, hips bucking into your face as you hastily run your tongue against his tip, humming when the taste of his salty pre-cum flooded your senses. You took him into your mouth, not hesitating before working down his shaft, costing him in your saliva, your hand stroking the part of him you couldn't put in your mouth yet. Nicholas' needy whines and moans were muffled by your pussy as he squeezed your ass, lazily circling your clit with his tongue, manoeuvring between long, slow licks and quick, steady strokes. Your eyes watered, and it didn't take long to feel your stomach tighten. You abruptly pulled away from his cock, instead focusing on jerking him off the best you could while grinding down onto his face, head thrown back in ecstasy.
"Oh my fucking— Nick, I'm so close, can I cum f'you, please? Been so good f'you", you choked out as you felt your thighs shake around Nicholas' head, your grip on his cock tightening just enough to make Nicholas groan into your cunt. The vibrations sent a shiver down your spine, and as much as you didn't want to suffocate him, you also couldn't stop the desperate bucking of your hips. Your breaths came out short and ragged, eyes squeezed shut as the tip of his tongue teased your clenching, leaking hole, eagerly lapping everything you offered him.
Nicholas pulled back just enough to breathe for a second. One of his hands travelled up your ass, lingering on your back before tangling in your hair, roughly pushing your head down.
"If you wanna cum, you're gonna do it while I fuck your face— how's that sound? Hmm?", he mumbled, and you nodded, eager as ever, already lining his cock up to the level of your lips, your tongue lolling out of your mouth only to dip it into his sensitive slit. A shudder run down your spine when he moaned into you, the hand in your hair tightening just barely to assert his dominance over you. His hips began to buck into your awaiting mouth, and you hummed lowly, wrapping your lips against his thick head, swirling your tongue just the way you knew he liked it. The taste of him, combined with his lips now beginning to continue their assault on your puffy cunt, had you seeing stars in no time. Nicholas flicked his tongue over your little nub just the way he knew you liked it, and you couldn't help but rock your hips in the rhythm of his mouth moving on you. Tears bricked in the corners of your eyes as your throat contracted around his tip, your tongue constantly rubbing against the underside of his cock; his breathy groans from underneath you only spurred you on.
"Cum for me, baby", Nicholas whispered, holding you in place as he bucked into your mouth, his eyes rolling back into his head when you swallowed and choked on his impressive length resting in your throat as if it belonged here. His grip on you was tight, bruising, and if it wasn't for the fireworks erupting in your lower belly, you'd probably cry out in pain. Saliva and pre-cum dropped down your chin, but you couldn't care less, as your back arched, hips moving mindlessly against Nicholas' face as much as they could. Your little, pathetic moans and whimpers were muffled by his cock as you came, shaking in Nicholas' tight grip, your nails digging into his thighs, leaving crescent marks in their wake.
It was earth-shattering, and for a moment you thought as if you might've passed out. Nicholas lapped everything you offered him eagerly, overstimulating your already spent pussy as he pressed soft kisses all over your mound. You pulled away from his cock, a string of saliva stretching between your lower lip and the reddened, leaking tip. As much as you wanted to make him cum, too, your whole body protested, and you fell back against the sheets limply. A broken sob escaped your mouth as you struggled to catch your breath, eyes and legs squeezed shut.
Nicholas wasn't having any of it, though. Before you knew it, he slipped in between your legs, his muscular body resting on top of you as if to prevent you from slipping away. One of his hands cradled your face, his thumb brushing against your burning skin in an almost soothing manner. You looked up at him through your lashes, meeting his dark gaze immediately. The intensity between you seemed to grow with each passing second, and you found yourself reaching for him, pulling him down just so that he could kiss you.
You tasted yourself on Nicholas' lips, whimpering into his mouth when his hardness brushed against your lower stomach, big and ever so needy. Your hands were in Nicholas' hair, pulling on the soft strands, playing with the hair on the nape of his neck. You had no idea how much you missed this, missed him, until he was so close to you again. Your back arched into his body as he moved to lift your thigh up his body, securing it on his waist, his tongue toying with yours in a way that had your head spin.
"Fucking look at you", he rasped lowly, gripping the base of his cock to rub himself up and down your wetness, coating himself in your sweet juices. You clenched around nothing, biting your lip hard enough to draw blood, the tension in your stomach building up the more time passed. "My needy, perfect girl. You're gonna fucking take it, yeah? I know you will".
You mindlessly nodded, and Nicholas chuckled, clearly amused by your fucked-up state — and he barely even started. Without a warning, he slipped into your wet, inviting hole, bottoming out almost instantly. He had no patience to take it slow anymore, consumed by the pure need running through his veins. Encouraged by the soft mewl that left your swollen lips, he began pounding into you, pressing one of your legs into the mattress to have you all spread out for him.
"Shit, Nic — God, you're so fucking big", you choked out, your nails digging into Nicholas' chest, leaving red marks in their wake. He met your gaze, sending you his typical, open-mouthed smirk that had your eyes rolling back.
Nicholas grabbed your jaw, forcing you to keep your gaze on him as he adjusted his position, just so that his lower abdomen brushed against your clit every time he bottomed out. Every now and then, he'd stop, grinding his hips against yours to let you feel all of him. You choked on your breath, unable to break the eye contact, your jaw slightly agape as his name left your mouth like a prayer. Your thighs shook where he had you pinned to the bed, your core clenching around him as if to prevent him from leaving. His cock dragged against your walls, and Nicholas made sure you could feel every vein, every throb, every delicious inch of it rearranging your insides. It didn't take long for the coil in your stomach to tighten yet again. You sobbed, feeling the saltiness of your own tears lingering in the corner of your lips. Throwing your head back, your hips bucked up to meet Nicholas halfway; your wide, glossy eyes focused on his face — on the way his jaw dropped, brows furrowed, his dark gaze burning into yours with intensity that left you shaking.
"You look s'pretty, drunk on my fucking cock. You're perfect. My perfect girl", Nicholas cooed, groping your boob tightly, pounding into you as if you were nothing more than his personal toy.
And you loved every second of it.
Your bottom lip trembled as you bit on it, desperately trying to conceal the pathetic sounds that threatened to leave your throat with every brutal thrust. Nicholas pinched your nipple between his fingers, throwing his head back and groaning deeply. The sound alone made you gush around him, your orgasm beginning to overtake you, and you weren't sure if you'd be able to hold it even if he asked you to.
"Nick, I'm— Oh, fuck — I'm gonna cum, please, can I cum f'you?", you managed to choke out, pulling him closer, your hands clasping down on his broad shoulders for balance. Nicholas chuckled breathlessly, hiding his face in the crook of your neck. You felt him twitch against your walls, signalling that he was close as well, holding out just for you.
"Shit, baby, you're gonna make me cum already", he groaned, partially amazed, but not surprised. "You're gonna cum with me, baby— I'm gonna pump you full of my cum, yeah? Oh, you fucking love it", he laughed breathlessly, feeling you clench around him at the promise in his words. It was utterly possessive, the way his voice trembled, his thrusts becoming sloppy as he neared the all familiar edge. And you weren't far behind.
"You're mine. You're fucking mine, baby. I'm never letting you go", he muttered lowly before stilling inside you, making you groan in disappointment. "Turn around".
You obeyed, letting his cock plop out of your cunt for a spare second before you turned around on shaky legs. Nicholas' rough hand pressed on your lower back, arching you for him, your ass now on full display for his greedy eyes. Before you knew it, he was already back inside you, setting a rough, earth-shattering pace that had you clutching on the sheets. A strangled, broken sob left your mouth, and Nicholas moaned lowly, watching the way your backside snapped against his hips with each thrust. With one of his hands on your hip and the other tangled in your hair, Nicholas pulled you flush against him, your back meeting his hard chest. The sound of skin slapping, punctuated by your cries and Nicholas' low groans filled the room, so familiar; so addicting.
"Open your mouth f'me, baby, c'mon", he urged, and you obeyed, your head resting against his shoulder as he wrapped his arms securely around your waist, keeping you upright. Your tongue lolled out of your mouth as you stared up at him, wide eyed, mascara smudged over your flushed cheeks, neck covered with hickeys of his creation. With a throaty groan, he spat in your mouth, making sure your eyes stayed locked on his as he did. "Swallow".
So you did. Your legs trembled as you neared your peak again, your back arching off his chest just as one of his hands travelled down your body, squeezing your left buttock roughly. Nicholas' touch was so addicting; you nearly screamed in pleasure when he spanked you, once, twice, thrice. He made sure to claim you in every way possible, to make sure you'd never look in the direction of another man ever again.
Your orgasm hit you without a warning. You fell forward, burying your face in the sheets as you screamed, creaming all over Nicholas' cock, going limp in his grasp. He moaned shamelessly, watching the way your juices created a creamy ring around the base of his cock. The sight alone made his muscles clench, thrusts becoming sloppy as he gripped your hips, his head thrown back in ecstasy.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck! — Oh my God, yes", he whimpered lowly, bottoming out before letting go; spurts of his hot, sticky cum claiming your walls, his cock pulsing and throbbing inside you making you moan into the sheets. You grinded back the best you could, milking him of everything he had to offer, and God — even he could feel how much he filled you up.
Nicholas collapsed on top of you, and you welcomed the familiar weight of his body pressing against yours. You were shaking, your breaths coming out in short, uneven gasps, the sheets beneath you soaked with tears that couldn't seem to stop flowing. The weight of your actions rested on your shoulders as you became to come down from the high. You had hoped he wouldn't leave this time — the thought itself made your heart ache, your throat burning with the words you wished you had the courage to say to him.
"Shh. C'mere, baby", Nicholas' soothing voice reached your ear as he kissed the back of your neck softly, his breath tickling your skin. You winced when he slowly pulled out of your drenched hole, not giving you a second to think before he leaned against the headboard, pulling you to lay on his chest. You sniffled, pushing your face into his bicep, inhaling the familiar scent of his. "I'm sorry. I didn't know— I just hoped you'd notice me. It's so complicated, Y/N. I don't want to ruin everything we have".
The words made you sniffle into his skin, pulling him closer as if you didn't want him to leave — and, in fact, it was true. You bit your lip, thinking about everything you've been through together; the longing you felt for him almost making your heart burst.
"I love you, Nick. I love you so bad it hurts. It's okay if you want to leave, I broke a rule, and I didn't—"
"Stop, Y/N. Stop", he interrupted, cradling your cheek softly, tilting your head so that you could meet his gaze. Your lower lip trembled when Nicholas' thumb rubbed circles into your skin, somehow making your muscles relax against him. "I love you. You hear me? I. Love. You. I want to be with you. Wake up by your side every day, fall asleep with you in my arms. Fuck, I could never want anything more", he whispered, and your heart fluttered in your chest, your jaw dropping as you searched for any kind of hesitation on his face. You didn't find any.
You sniffled again, letting out a relieved sigh; the weight on your heart seemed to finally fall into the dark abyss, replaced with relief so strong it almost made you sob.
"Let me take care of you now", Nicholas whispered, giving you space to rest, let his previous words sink in, smiling down at you with the all familiar warmth — and it felt like home, for the first time in a long time. "Should we search romantic comedies on Netflix and see what we find?".
You couldn't help but chuckle softly, kissing the side of his neck lovingly. Nicholas' hand found yours, his fingers intertwining with yours as if you were meant to be.
And maybe you were.
Just two souls, so utterly different; but they wouldn't be able to function without each other.
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galaxywannabe · 1 month ago
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Munch O'Clock
Joaquín Torres x Fem!Reader
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Summary: Joaquín comes back from his morning run hungry. He really should just let you sleep, but how else is he supposed to make sure his day starts off on the right track?
Warnings: 18+ contains smut mdni. Joaquín being the goofball boyfriend we all deserve. Reader identifies as a woman and has a vagina but there are no other physical descriptors as far as I'm aware!
Word Count: Roughly 2.5k
A/N: Ahhhh okay! So the idea for this came from this post and my addition to it, and then @moonymeloncholymoney suggested someone should write it, so I said fuck it and gave it my best go! And this is that! Constructive criticism is always welcome, and if you have something nice to say about it or you liked it please let me know! It feeds my soul and keeps me writing! Anyways I'm done yammering your ear off, enjoy!
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Joaquín gets up for his daily run stupid early, like, before the sun is even all the way up early, even on his days off. So naturally, when he arrives back at your apartment roughly 45 minutes after he left it, thoroughly sweating through his cutoff t-shirt despite the early spring chill, you're still fast asleep.
You are decidedly not an early riser, even on the days that you really should be, and accordingly your alarm isn't set to go off for another 3 hours - hours you intend to spend blissfully unconscious, dead to the world. That is, until you're startled awake with a yelp as your boyfriend tugs you by the ankles down to the foot of the bed. 
The transition from sleep to wakefulness is an abrupt one, the peace of unconsciousness ripped from your grasp in the span of a single second, and as you lift your head to meet the rich, brown puppy dog eyes of your boyfriend, you know there's only one culprit responsible. 
“Joaquín, I was sleeping,” you grumble, reaching up to rub the grit from your eyes as his expression turns sheepish.
“I know, mi amor, I'm sorry. You just kicked all the covers off yourself, and you looked so pretty laying there, and then before I knew it…” 
He gives you those innocent eyes again, like it was by complete accident that he ended up kneeling at the foot of your bed, your body dragged down the length of the mattress so your pelvis was directly in front of his face. You sigh, already knowing what's about to happen and resigning to your fate - as if it's such a chore being constantly lusted after by your beautiful boyfriend. 
“Was there something you needed at-” you turn your head to the alarm clock on your nightstand, the glaring red numbers a cruel reminder of the sleep you should be getting right now, “-5:56 in the morning?”
He hesitates for a moment, chewing his lip as he flicks his eyes between your face and the space between your legs, obviously conflicted. You can tell that he desperately wants to ask, but he's not sure if he should.
He really does look guilty for waking you up, and you feel bad as you watch him actively consider suppressing his desire so he doesn't inconvenience you. You were only being grouchy in a playful way, not actually trying to dissuade him.
You reach down for his hand resting on the mattress by your hip, taking it and squeezing reassuringly. “If you do need something, you can ask me, angel. I was just teasing, I won't be mad.”
He looks up at you, his gaze holding yours as if he's searching for the truth in your words. When he finds it, he seems to relax. His shoulders loosen a little, and there's a more obvious glint of excitement in his eyes as he looks back down at the part of your anatomy hidden by the gusset of your little sleep shorts.
He looks so gorgeous right now, even moreso than usual despite the high standard he sets. The sun is starting to rise, soft rays of light breaking through the blinds of your window and reflecting off his deep brown irises, highlighting the desperation there. He's still absolutely soaked through with sweat from his morning run, dark patches in the grey fabric around his chest and armpits from the exertion, and you can smell the musky tang of it from here, sharp and masculine in your nostrils, 100% Joaquín.
Setting off the whole image, the perfect cherry on top to his already devastating appearance, is the backwards baseball cap on his head, a few dark, sweaty curls flopping through the opening in the front and touching his forehead.
The slightly shy smirk he gives you as he finally decides to make his request is absolutely panty-melting, one big hand coming up to grip your inner thigh beneath the hem of your shorts, warm and possessive. “Breakfast?”
You almost let out a groan, but you don't want him to misinterpret it as anything other than completely positive, so you suppress it. Instead you just give him an amused little smile, anticipation fluttering in your gut as you raise one brow skeptically.
“That's what you want for breakfast, Joaquín?”
He nods enthusiastically, his eyes dancing with humor as he bows to kiss the exposed skin of your thigh gently. “Absolutely. I wanna start my day off right, angel. Gotta get in my fuckin’ Wheaties or whatever, so I can go crush the rest of my day.”
You laugh, shoulders shaking at the ridiculousness of that entire statement, your gaze fond even as you roll your eyes. “Is that what you're gonna tell Sam later, when you meet him down at the ring for sparring? That you've got an extra spring in your step because you ate your girl's pussy this morning?”
“If it means you'll let me do it right now, then yes, I absolutely will tell him that,” he answers, the look in his eyes completely serious despite his smile.
Horrified at just the mental image of such an exchange, you shudder, wrinkling your nose but still finding your boyfriend's desperation amusing. “Ew, no, please no, do not tell him that. I'll let you have it, just please don't tell Sam anything about our sex life ever.”
Joaquín’s eyes light up, a dog with a bone as his fingers skate up your hips to hook in the waistband of both your shorts and panties, stopping short of removing them until he has explicit permission. “Yeah? Deal.”
You can't help but snort, completely enamored by both the excited glint in his eye and the way he's willing to agree to whatever the hell you want as long as it gets his mouth on you. If you were a more scheming woman, perhaps you'd use that to your advantage, but as it stands you can never deny him anything when he looks at you like this.
Some days it's hard to believe you have a partner who wants you so badly all the time, but then you have a moment like this one, where he's on his knees by the end of the bed, still soaked in sweat from his workout but too desperate to wait another second, and you know it's genuine. He couldn't fake that pussy-drunk look in his eyes if he tried. 
“Alright then, deal. Go ahead, take what you want. It belongs to you anyways, you know that.”
You'd think you just offered him the keys to the city the way he's looking at you right now, a visible shudder wracking down his spine at your dirty words. He tugs your shorts and underwear down your legs like he's worried you'll change your mind, though over the course of your entire relationship you don't think you've ever given him reason to suspect you would.
The room air is a little cold against the heated, damp flesh between your legs, but in an instant he's so close that his warm breath is there on your skin, chasing away any chill. He looks up at you, waiting like he's giving you one more chance to back out. Like you ever would when there's head from Joaquín Torres on the table. 
“Go ahead, amor, have your breakfast. I think we both could call this a great start to our day, yeah?”
It's all the permission he needs, but he doesn't dive in the way he so clearly wants to, the way a person might be expected to given the slightly crazed look in his eyes. Even in a heightened state of arousal, Joaquín is all about savoring things, especially where you're concerned.
He starts with soft kisses on your plush inner thighs, scattering them sweetly on each side, slowly approaching his ultimate goal. Your legs instinctively part further for him, falling open on the mattress in an involuntary reaction to his touch, and he pats the outside of your thigh in approval as he continues to work his way up, his pace unhurried. 
Even when he gets there, he still doesn't partake quite yet, pausing to take in a slow inhale, a satisfied rumble going off in his chest at the scent of you. You can’t help but let out a small, flustered whimper, a blush rising to your cheeks; having a man be so unabashedly enthralled by your body is simultaneously incredibly flattering and a little embarrassing. There’s no shame on Joaquín’s face, though, just his half-lidded, hazy stare as he turns his eyes up to meet yours, dragging out the moment as you wait with anticipation for him to begin. Jesus.
Your boyfriend’s a bit of a hyperactive guy, always jumping around with boundless energy, but nothing shuts off his brain faster than eating your pussy. That’s not to say that he’s thoughtless about it - he’s not - or that he's not incredibly skilled at it - he definitely is. It’s just that when he’s doing this, it’s all he’s thinking about, and something about that sets every inch of your body on fire every time.
Either unwilling or unable to hold himself back anymore, your boyfriend lowers his face carefully to your center and licks a long, hot stripe from your hole to your clit, collecting the ample moisture you’ve already produced along the way, tasting it on his tongue. You know he makes a noise of satisfaction because you can feel the vibrations spread pleasantly through your skin, but you can’t hear it over the loud gasp that tears from your lungs, nor over your heartbeat thudding in your ears.
This burst of pleasure should not come as a surprise to you - Joaquín has probably eaten you out more just over the course of your relationship than most women experience in their entire lives, and it’s always incredible - but somehow despite their familiarity, his ministrations on your swollen flesh feel brand new. Rather than dipping low again for another taste, he lingers at the top of you, his tongue flicking against your clit this way and that, quick but gentle, careful not to overwhelm you. It’s a nice sentiment, but when he’s on you like this, it’s pretty much inevitable.
As he starts to work on you in earnest, suckling gently at your bundle of nerves and then shifting down to probe at your entrance to give you a moment of reprieve, you hit an infuriating conundrum. As is your instinct when in the throes of passion, you reach down to tangle your fingers in your boyfriend's hair, both to ground yourself and as an outlet for the restless energy thrumming through your veins. But just when your fingertips should be making direct contact with the soft, silky curls at the top of his head, you feel fabric beneath them instead, and you frown. 
An indignant whine breaks from your lips and, god help you, your ever-attentive angel of a boyfriend catches it even in the midst of his favorite activity. His eyes flit up to yours, and his face pulls back just a hair so he can speak without muffling his voice against your folds.
“Okay, querida?” he checks, his voice rough as his tongue flicks out subconsciously to gather some of the nectar shining on his lips.
You're about to grouse and tell him that the stupid damn hat needs to come off, to get it out of your way so you can hold on the way you like, but now that you're actually looking at him you feel indecision rising in your chest. Shit. He looks goddamn incredible like this. His lower face is glinting slightly in the early morning light with your arousal, which is obviously a sight to behold all on its own.
But when you take in the rest of him - the residual beads of sweat from his morning run still dripping down the side of his face, the workout clothes that he's too occupied to notice are sticking to his skin - it's even worse. And that damned hat, as inconvenient as its presence might be, is the most important part of this picture. 
It's just some old cap with the air force logo on it, probably pulled from the back of his closet and plopped backwards over his bedhead haphazardly before he left for his run. But goddamn, something about the fact that he's still got it on as he makes out sloppily with your cunt? It's debauched, it's filthy, and it's so incredibly hot.
Your mind spirals over this observation for several long seconds, wheeling between wanting his hair freed and needing the cap to stay on for the rest of his damn life, but to Joaquín it must seem like hesitation because he starts to pull away with concern. You shake your head urgently, reaching out in panic for the back of his head as if to keep his face back where it belongs. 
“Shit, no- I mean yes, everything is great! Sorry, I just looked down and got distracted by how pretty you are for a second. Please keep going.”
It's the truth, but you decide not to mention the hat specifically in case he gets self-conscious about it and tries to take it off. He quirks an amused brow at you like you're the biggest weirdo on the planet - which is rich given he's the one who literally woke you up just to eat you out first thing in the morning - but he seems comforted by your reassurance, and with a huff through his nose he obliges your request, getting back to work without another word.
As you watch him fall back into his rhythm, that damned ballcap perched tauntingly over his sweaty curls, you resign yourself to gripping the sheets instead to keep you grounded through the onslaught of pleasure, just this once. 
Joaquín makes you come hard on his lips and tongue twice before he's satisfied with his “breakfast”, and then he's dashing off to the shower to rinse off his workout, not even asking you to return the favor like the gentleman he is. As you listen to the water running in the other room, along with the muffled sounds of Joaquín singing off key, you reach your trembling fingertips out for your cell phone.
Despite your whole body still buzzing with the aftershocks of your orgasms, you hastily add about 10 new baseball caps to your shopping cart, making a mental note to order them while he's away on his next mission. Your poor, unsuspecting boyfriend has no idea there's about to be a new staple in his wardrobe, though you have a feeling if he knew the reason, there wouldn't be any complaints.
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moonlight-prose · 6 months ago
Note
I either want to tend to Gabriel’s wounds or make some with my nails 😏
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bound in the strands of permanence
a/n: knowing how intense his battles get when monster hunting, he must be so numb to the pain. because of course he is. it's been centuries of life, countless wounds, and he's unable to stop from wanting that infliction back. but in a different way. i really just word vommitted cause this was meant to be a drabble. my bad.
summary: he walked with monsters in the night, claiming their lives for a vendetta placed upon him by the church. but he found peace in daylight with the touch of your healing hands.
word count: 1.9k+
pairing: gabriel van helsing x f!reader
warnings: EXPLICIT SO MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY!!, love, tending to wounds, pain kink, masochism, tw: blood, breeding kink, p in v sex, rough sex, they're unhinged and in love, dirty talk, forever.
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Pain was inconsequential in the grand scheme of being God's right hand. Immortality ran through his veins like a poison without an antidote. He couldn't necessarily die. People have tried, monsters have nearly succeeded, but death never asked for him to deign its doorstep.
He was bound to life on a planet riddled with evil—destined to drag each horrid creature to the pits of hell with him.
But pain was a different matter altogether.
After so many wounds, knives, bullets, arrows, he could no longer register the nerves that stretched to and fro beneath his body. They were there. Unmistakable with the phantom aches and near deaths that still plagued his eternal soul. But remembering why they came to be eventually rescinded to the back of his mind—an afterthought to all the detriments of his waking life.
Years went by before he dared to ask someone for help. But a particularly nasty wound to his shoulder was out of reach even for him. Which is how he came to stumble onto your small quarters in the furthest reaches of the Vatican.
There were other healers, other doctors who could have easily stitched up his wound. But you weren't a member of the church.
He found that ironic.
Neither of you mentioned how long it'd been since he stumbled through your doors, shoving a bag of coins into your hand, before falling onto the cleared wooden table meant for patients in the city. Not that either of you couldn't remember it. Two years, three months, and two brand new flesh wounds that barely needed wrapping.
Yet he still came anyway.
"Turn into a beast again?" you questioned, wrapped the cloth tight along his scarred abdomen.
He smiled, shuddering at the icy touch of your hands. "That was one time."
"One time too many."
"And if it hadn't of happened I wouldn't have a reason to come here."
You scoffed, tying the knot painfully, relishing a bit in the harsh grunt he let out. "You don't need a reason to come see me Gabriel."
"It's impolite to knock on a lady's door this late without a reason." He shook his head, unconsciously sliding his hand over yours that remained on his wound. "I'm not one to mistreat a lady."
"I'm hardly that. They won't even let me in the fucking church–"
Sharp eyes dragged up to your face, glaring at the pout in your lips that formed a curse. He may have been a man who found your way of life refreshing, but he was still devoted to the God above. Your mouth curled into a wry smile—hand moving to tip his chin up. To remove his gaze and place it where you wanted him to truly look.
"It's not right how they treat you," he rasped.
The familiar dark cloud of grief began to drip into his iris, shrouding his once sharp gaze that pierced each part of your soul. They called him God's right hand. The man who was sent from the heavens above. You merely thought of him as the man who gripped your heart in an iron fist—reluctant to let you go.
"I'm not one of you."
He sighed. "You could be."
"Only through the binds of marriage would I enter that place and even then, I don't entirely wish to follow rules not made of my own volition."
"Marriage," he mumbled, eyes dropping to the lip you worried between your teeth. "To whom, if I may ask?"
"To no one."
"Why?"
The way he looked at you is what threw you off guard. Intense, without boundaries that may have been set in place for other patients. He weeded out your deepest fears and silently vowed to rip each one apart with his bare hands. Monsters walked beside him in the night, but Gabriel Van Helsing was doomed to wander the daylight alone. Yet he found...he didn't want to anymore.
"If I were to ask..."
Your knees almost buckled - the weight of his inquiry slamming directly into your chest. "Ask me what?"
Gabriel looked at you as if it was the most obvious answer in the world. As if nothing felt more right than the words about to spill from his lips. To be bound to a soul meant permanence in the eyes of his God, and how lovely it might be.
To have someone he could be permanent with.
"To marry me darling."
There remained an answer to this madness. A final solemn vow you might have otherwise been able to say. But his confession hung in the air like a cloud that refused to dissipate with the change in weather. When had he fallen in love? When had he finally relented to the ache that built in his chest?
When did he realize that he came here at night for you and not for his wounds?
You wanted to give him something in return—a promise that could outlast all that threatened to rip him from you.
So you kissed him. You dragged him close—your hand tangling in his hair—and caught his lips in a kiss that damn near threw him off the table. He didn't expect to finally taste you, his heart hammering an unsteady beat in his chest. But he certainly wasn't about to complain. He met your actions in kind, gripping onto the flesh of your hips with a soft groan.
His tongue met yours—hesitance bleeding through each action—and when he found no resistance he finally devoured what he hungered for. Standing to his full height, he licked into your mouth, his hand gripping the back of your neck painfully to keep you close. Neither of you even registered what happened when he crowded you against the heavy wooden door sealed shut with a lock.
"Gabriel," you sighed, bending to let him drag his tongue down your throat.
"Say yes," he growled, rucking up your skirts as you worked the belt of his pants still coated in grime and dust. "Marry me. Be mine forever."
"God above." A gasp tore from your chest when he notched his dripping cock at your entrance.
He held you there, fixing his gaze on your face, even as you tried to drag your hips forward. "Darling."
"I want..."
"What?"
A moan rumbled in his chest when you finally looked at him—the love you kept locked away pouring out into the furrow of your brows. The tears that fell down your cheeks. Hiding it felt pointless at this time. Because you knew your answer, you knew the second he stumbled through your door demanding you help him. You knew it the moment his gaze locked on yours.
Forever would be spent here. In the safety of his hold.
"I'll marry you," you breathed.
There were few times you managed to see this man smile. Once or twice when you told a joke. More often due to the biting pain on his body as you stitched him up—a defense mechanism rather than agonizing grunts he used to give you. And now when your words settled in his mind - solidifying something he wondered about for years.
His lips bloomed into a smile that met his eyes for the very first time. Light practically shone directly from the hazel iris.
You expected him to give you an answer, a shower of words full of love. Instead he sunk into you with a harsh groan, his forehead falling to yours, mouth swallowing the cry that erupted from your chest.
Lovers existed in your life before him—a sprinkle of men who once or twice believed you'd be their wife one day. But none of them compared to the one before you. Gabriel stretched you wide enough to hurt, but he quickly sought out the small bud pulsing for attention—circling it slowly with each shallow thrust.
Your legs shook under the sensations, nails digging into his bare shoulders, and for the first time...he felt pain.
A fractured cry escaped his mouth, finding its way into yours as you sharply cut him to ground yourself. Panic flooded your veins at the thought of hurting him. Only to feel his hips slam into yours, impaling you on his twitching cock spurting precum like a broken faucet.
"Again," he rumbled, pulling out at an achingly slow pace. Only to punch back in and drag out a shout from the depths of your stomach. "Hurt me again."
"But–"
"Do it."
Cutting your nails down his back—blood welling to the surface immediately—you felt his entire body shudder. His head tipping back as he fucked into you fast enough to hurt. There was no rhythm to how he moved. Rutting into you wildly like the beast he once became—his body overwhelmed with a mix of pain and pleasure. Agony merging together with the love he felt for you.
The wet squelch of your cunt swallowing him in with each thrust echoed in the small confines of your room. Each one followed by the loud resounding echo of your moans and his ragged grunts. You felt unhinged. Probably looked like it too.
But pleasure was creeping up on you faster than you could anticipate. Your nails marred his skin with each blinding strike of his cock against your walls. It drowned you. Swallowed you up with the promise to spit you back out later.
You'd never felt so whole before.
"I can feel her begging," he gasped against your lips, a string of spit connecting your mouth to his. "Will you let me?"
"Uh-huh."
He smiled, harsh and unforgiving. "We'll have a little one running around by the time our vows are exchanged mea amor."
His words struck something in your chest—dragging out the darkest secret you kept hidden each time he looked at you. Binding yourself with him through the bonds of marriage was one thing. Having his child remained something else entirely. You almost loathed how much you loved the idea.
"Oh–"
"You'll make me a sinner," he babbled, stimulating your clit until pain began to spark up your spine. "A child before marriage. What will God think?"
"G-Gabriel!" A violent tremble began in your legs, working up your body until he was forced to hold you up with his body weight. "I-I can feel it."
He chuckled, speeding up just enough to push you over the edge. A scream echoing off the stone walls—ringing in his ears as your walls clamped down, a gush of cum coating down to his balls. What he wouldn't give to see that again. Your face screwed up in pleasure, pain bleeding into his body with each scratch of your nails.
"It will simply have to take," he gasped, spilling into you with a cry of his own.
Seconds bled into a minute and yet he couldn't stop cumming. The sticky warmth of it trailed down your legs and dripped onto the floor. And he merely shoved back into your—keeping it from spilling out entirely. Intent on keeping each promise he made.
Kissing your cheeks, he found your lips with a sigh. "Take this."
"What?" you mumbled, vision blurry with tears.
The cold kiss of metal on your finger stirred you back to life. "Until I find a jewel meant to sit on your hand."
His insignia burned through your chest, claiming you under the very name he sought to learn more about. You were to be his. A Van Helsing of your own volition. It should have terrified you.
Yet the fear was nowhere to be found.
"I love you Gabriel. I should have told you years ago..."
With a soft kiss to your forehead, he curled his arms around your back. "Then tell me again tomorrow."
And each day after that.
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quickestgold · 1 month ago
Text
Goodbye, My Lover | Part 2 | The Pitt
Pairing: Dr. Jack Abbot x Dr. (Ex-Mil)!Reader x Dr. Michael 'Robby' Robinavitch
Chapter 2: Please Forgive Me
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Synopsis: When Robby and Jack find you, old wounds reopen, as guilt and regret threaten to tear apart what’s left of your fractured relationships. As your hearts reconnect in an unexpected moment of closeness, long-buried feelings begin to resurface and the possibility of forgiveness feels closer than ever.
Warnings: Age gap is around 18 years. This series will deal with some heavy themes around a physical attack, death, grief, ptsd, panic attacks, s*icidal tendencies, heartbreak >>> comfort at the end, I promise
Word count: 1463
A/n: How are you even supposed to choose between these two, like hello? Anyway, we'll find out soon won't we... Next chapter is heavyyy
Previous Chapter (1): I Love You | Next Chapter (3): I Forgive You
Robby and Jack find you slumped in an alley, unmoving, propped against the cold building facade.
Jack is instantly by your side, rubbing your sternum forcefully, desperate for a response, anything.
Robby's fingers press against the side of your neck, terrified of what he might find, or not. "Y/N?" He opens your eyelids, blinding you with a penlight.
You groan, barely audible “Stop.”
“Y/N, you with us?” Jack huffs, ridden with anxiety.
“I’m fine.” You say louder, pushing their hands away.
Relief washes over them, but it doesn't last long.
“Did you take something?” Robby scans the ground for anything that might explain this.
“What? No”, you plead, offended by the suggestion.
“What happened?” Jack's voice is softer now.
You blink, taking in your surroundings, not really sure yourself. “I must’ve passed out.”
Neither of the men speak, unsure whether to confess how badly they were spiralling when they couldn’t find you. Was it even their place to worry?
“I’m just so done”, you interrupt their thoughts.
“With what?” Robby inquires too quickly.
“Everything. This job. This hospital. Maybe this city.”
“This life?” Jack states flatly.
The bluntness shocks you. Robby as well, but he wonders too.
“N- No. You know I wouldn’t.” You stare into Jack's eyes, pleading for something unknown. Not after everything you’d gone through. You really wouldn’t. Does he believe you?
Jack turns his gaze away from you, as to somehow escape the conversation that had been building between you for a long time. Waiting to break. His mouth twists downwards. A tear gathers in his eye, the pain of losing you creeping in. There were a couple of close calls on the tours you spent together, but the day he nearly lost you, broke him.
Robby knows some of the details of your relationship, but the depth of the pain and unresolved sadness between you leaves him speechless.
The tension is palpable. It’s only now, in this moment, that you all realize how much you’ve hurt each other without even meaning to.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Both of you”, your eyes flicker to Robby’s.
The moment lingers in heavy silence.
“Why did you come back here?” Robby asks.
You wonder whose idea it was to search for you here. Probably Jack, right? His ability to keep a clear head and to stay calm in the most impossible situations always shocked you. But equally, his stoic demeanor drove you crazy, especially when it came to letting you in and dealing with your past together.
Maybe it was Robby. Robby would panic, but then analyse the situation at hand and find a solution. Always.
Now you needed to know.
“How did you find me?” You ask, disregarding their earlier question.
“Dana”, they answer in perfect unison.
You give a soft smile and though the situation is heavy, it’s enough to make Robby and Jack’s hearts melt. The warmth in your eyes brings an unexpected tenderness, like a comforting embrace for the soul and before they can help it, both of them smile too.
You sit in the peaceful silence, the weight of everything feeling just a little bit lighter, as though the past has softened its grip on you all.
But all too soon, reality creeps back in.
“I didn’t know you come back here often", Jack's face grows serious again. "It seems… painful."
“Sometimes", you admit. "When I need to convince myself that an alley is just an alley...”
Talking about it hurts, but pretending it didn't happen is just as difficult. For them too.
You feel your hands tremble again, instinctively pulling them closer to your chest. But Robby notices, closing the distance between you and offering his shoulder. It’s the same comfort he always gave you, like second nature.
When he walked away, the void he left was unbearable.
But now he’s here.
You sink your forehead into the crook of his neck, taking slow, cleansing breaths. His familiar scent floods you, a quiet reminder of all the unexpressed love.
“It’s okay. I’ve got you”, Robby whispers, as you melt deeper into him, your heartbeat syncing with his.
Slowly, the panic subsides.
Jack watches you both, eyes hard, fighting his own memories.
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It's an unusually quiet shift. The eerie kind where everyone's on edge, waiting for something to break.
You and Jack work a couple of cases together, like you usually do.
You were always a great team. Made each other better in ways few people understood. But Robby did. He always respected your deep bond, even when you and Robby were dating. It's the kind that runs deeper than friendship, deeper than love, it's survival. Maybe it's because Robby and Jack share their own connection, a brotherhood built on mutual trust and support.
Your breakup with Jack was mutual, the weight of your shared history and trauma made it inevitable. You both walked away, at different points, caught in your own separate battles. You saved lives together, but you also lost them. And in the process, you lost parts of yourselves too. You both gave so much to everyone else, there was nothing left to give each other. It wasn't anyone's fault.
Still, you can’t help but feel like it was yours. Like you destroyed something great. Not just with Jack, but with Robby too.
The breakup with Robby really tested everything. Words were said, hearts broken and neither of you knew how to navigate this new reality. Somehow, Jack found himself in the middle and all of you blamed yourselves.
You weren’t the one who left this time, but maybe you pushed Robby too hard, pressured him to open up when he wasn’t ready.
So you accepted Robby's decision and watched him leave.
You wonder if he expected you to fight for him, to not let him go so easily.
That day in the ER, Robby snaps at you. In front of everyone. In front of Jack.
Jack’s breath hitches, trying hard not to intervene. To say something. Why wouldn't he? It's you. But he doesn't. And for that he'd never forgive himself.
It's not rational. But later, when you're lying in that hospital bed, machines and monitors beeping in a faint rhythm, their minds force them to dissect every little detail that led up to what happened. As if that could somehow undo it.
“I am your attending. You are a resident. When I tell you to do something, you do it", Robby barks. "If you can't respect that, then maybe this hospital isn’t for you.”
You just look at him, incredulous. But he continues, louder.
“You’re acting like a fucking child!” Regret washes over him as soon as the words leave his mouth.
You rip off your gloves with a snap, glancing at Jack, daring - no - willing him to speak up. But part of you is glad he doesn't. This is between you and Robby. Deep down you know it isn’t personal, but it still hurts, so you decide to give both of you space.
“Dr. Robinavitch”, you say before walking out, unaware how that split decision would lead to you almost losing your life.
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All three of you now lean against the building facade, a comforting familiarity between you.
Your breathing has steadied, but your eyes are still glazed. You look up at Robby. For a moment, you are back to being his. And he yours. He gives you a soft smile, the one that crinkles the corners of his eyes and your heart nearly bursts, memories rushing back.
You remember kissing every freckle on his forehead, tracing the lines of his skin. He always thought they made him look old. You agreed, which made him laugh. But you also thought they made him look kind. How fitting.
A shaky gasp cuts through your thoughts. Jack drops his head, one hand pressing against his eyes, desperate to hide the pain that tears through him.
“Jack?” You whisper, reaching for him.
Jack lets out a quiet sob, fighting every urge not to fall apart in front of you. He can't.
You grab both of his wrists, grounding him with your presence as you pull him into your chest. His head rests gently against your heart, a silent promise that he will always be part of it.
“Hey", you tilt your head, searching for his eyes. "I'm here."
Maybe you love him differently now, but the ache in your chest tells you that some bonds can't be broken.
“Please forgive me,” he begs, his voice breaking, as the weight of his pain truly hits you.
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Thanks for reading part 2!! Oh boi, this was a sad one… and it’s only getting worse before it gets better is all I’m gonna say hehe. Pls share your thoughts, I love reading your comments!!
PS: Lmk if you want to be added to the taglist: ♡
@queenslandlover-93 @sp00kylesley @dark-twisted-and-mechanical-mind @sqrlgrl22 @imonmykneessir @gabsgabsvaz
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virahaus · 2 months ago
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Why yes. If you are here on this post and you know me, you already know what this means.
Unhinged Obikin thoughts late at night, my dears.
So! This is something that is in so few aus it makes me sad, cause the potential is soooo good but I digress. Let's get into it shall we?
Palpatine is the man with all the plans and counter plans so I do believe he would have a back up plan should Anakin, shall we say, not comply with what he wants him to do. And here we get so many delicious choices, such as:
- Palpatine created a clone of Anakin just in case Anakin didn't fall to his manipulations, and it's the clone the one who is sent to the temple to kill everyone and it's him who battles Obi-Wan on Mustafar. Anakin is kept in stasis so that he can't wake up and oppose Palpatine and also cause Palpatine is a sadistic fuck who would have Anakin in the room with all the displayed dead Jedis Obi-Wan eventually finds in the series.
- Palpatine is able to mind control Anakin too, similarly to the clones, a la Winter Soldier style. Obi-Wan is too freaked out by this Anakin who doesn't give any signs of recognition to battle him on Mustafar and instead decides to go into hiding to find resources to free Anakin from Palpatine.
Either way I'm connecting all of this to the fantastic "death wife hallucinations" Obi-Wan has in OWK. Can you imagine the deliciousness, the soul wrenching angst and longing, is those visions Obi-Wan has is actually Anakin trying to reach Obi-Wan to make him aware that he's either a) kidnapped, b) trying to break free of the mind control enough to explain,,,, and Obi-Wan being convinced that he's a) delusional and devastated, or b) enraged and devastated.
Can y'all imagine Obi-Wan finding Anakin in stasis in that creepy Jedi trophy room,,,, or finding Anakin right when they are prepping him for another conditioning,,,, he would raze the place to the ground just to get Anakin out of there. The feral energy. The guilt for not realising sooner that his Anakin was not Darth Vader. The hunt for blood for both the abomination that impersonated his beloved/the mind control, the people involved and Palpatine,,,,, I fear he would do a massacre and not even bat an eye akdnKnxks
Also I know Obi-Wan won't let Anakin out of sight ever again. If before they were attached to the hip now Obi-Wan carries him around 24/7. Literally walks around with Anakin cuddled to his chest. The pampering Anakin would get would be insane. If he was spoiled by Obi-Wan before now it's another level. If someone dares look at Anakin twice and Obi-Wan doesn't like how they looked it's possible the person will be risking his health, literally.
Meanwhile, Yoda is just happy Palpashit is dead (stabbed multiple times by Obi-Wan first, then Obi-Wan kept him still as Anakin stabbed him some more and beheaded him). The Jedi order won't be the same ever again anyway so what if Obi-Wan and Anakin are calling themselves Jedi and getting married and trying their hardest to get Anakin's pregnant even if it's not physically possible? It's none of Yoda's business, that is. He's looking forward to being the fun grandpa to Luke, Leia and any other children that might come after (Yoda is not overruling anything with those two). Man be looking at Obi-Wan handfeeding Anakin and be like, I'm too old for this. Jedi marriage is now legal, let me return to my swamp. Literally only call me if you want me to babysit. Peace out.
And everyone lived happily ever after 😌
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whatswrongwithblue · 6 months ago
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Reader does actually try to walk off a cliff and Alastor catches them and gets furious and sexy about it and pounds Vexi... I mean reader into the mattress so hard she can't walk anymore and he ends up laughing saying 'let's see you try to do that again now your legs won't work'
Beta'd by @inuhalfdemon
For my darling @redvexillum, I know you're Overtime Vexi right now; working hard on the Discord server, keeping up with daily Kinktober posts, and also literally working an IRL job. This is a no pressure gift to you. Read when you have time and need a little pick me up. I even based Reader off of your avatar on your blog and used language specifically from my favorite fic of yours . . . you know the one *wink wink*.
TRIGGER WARNINGS!: suicide ideation, suicide attempt, depression, mental illness, dissociation, possesive Alastor, Alastor owns Reader's soul, sex as punishment, angry sex, oral (fem receiving), p/v sex, shadow tendrils/tentacles, bondage, use of a gag, overstimulation, lack of aftercare, begging, dom/sub dynamic.
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Falling
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The warm night breeze ghosted through your hair; a gentle lover’s caress across the back of your neck. It calmed your nerves as you looked down at the drop below and you closed your eyes, thinking you could almost hear the wind telling you to take that final step.
Just one little step.
A few seconds of falling.
Then darkness. Nothing. Peace.
The wind kicked up a little harder, fanning out your wings, and nearly making you lose your balance. You gasped and flailed your arms, catching your balance before you fell.
A stupid lingering human instinct to save yourself. Your body’s nervous system fighting against what your mind desperately wanted.
You took a deep, steadying breath in, and tucked your wings in. They were tiny; pink and membranous things that seemed more for aesthetic than any kind of purpose. It’s not like you could fly with them. They were no more useful than your asymmetrical horns when it came to that skill only very few Sinners were lucky enough to have. And they weren’t even very demonic looking, as far as demon appendages went. Both your horns and your wings were pink, slightly darker shades than the pastel of your skin and hair. Even your fucking irises were pink.
While you quite loved pink as a human, it just felt insulting down in Hell. Like every other aspect of your demon visage. Useless. Infantile. Boring.
Nearly making you fall to your death by being caught in a sudden gust of hot air was the only favor your wings had ever done for you.
Not that you would permanently die, you lamented. Eventually you would re-spawn somewhere within the city. But re-spawning took hours, sometimes even days. And in that time would be nothing. When you were alive you always joked about wishing that you could just take your brain out of your skull, like a temporary death, just to quiet the awful thoughts and feelings your malfunctioning organ plagued you with day and night.
Here in Hell, you could actually do that. Again and again, if you so chose to.
All you had to do was jump.
Maybe it wasn’t worth it. When you came back, Alastor would certainly hunt you down and find you. And you could just see the disappointment in his face. Hear the disgust in his voice. How lowly he would think of his darling then, that she would perform such an empty and pathetic act.
But then again, he was going to find out who you were at your core eventually. Better to rip the bandage off and make him face just how truly damaged you were before you continued to waste his time further. He was bound to get tired of pulling you out of your depressed funks after enough time had gone by. And what good did you bring to his life anyway?
You were a distraction.
He had snapped that to you earlier that evening when you had interrupted his work at the hotel. Those last stinging words echoed through your mind, branding themselves into your grey matter so that you never forgot them.
Well, you wouldn’t be distracting him anymore after this stunt. He wouldn’t bother with you afterwards.
And if you found you really did enjoy the nothingness that came between death and re-spawning, the extermination wasn’t far away. All you had to do was stand in front of an exorcist and simply not move as they brought their blade down on you. Then it would truly be an eternity of peace and quiet for you.
No more distractions.
The thought came to you bitterly as you considered that Alastor was the one who had been distracting you. All these months of his attention, of him making you his darling, of him making you fall in love with him, had just distracted you for a while. But now the pain was back, worse than ever, with one small argument between you two and you realized if it wasn’t for him, you likely would have jumped off this roof months ago.
You could have let it all go during the last extermination, while everyone else was huddled safely inside the hotel.
What a waste of time. A useless, boring, distracting life.
A deep breath. A single tear sliding down your cheek. A last thought of warmth and safety whispering through your mind . . .
“Alastor.”
His name left your lips like a prayer and an apology.
You took a step over the ledge.
The street below became your entire field of view as you lost your footing entirely.
And then the world glitched.
Colors blended in choppy formation and static screamed in your ears, threatening to burst your ears drums. Everything was fuzzy and going dark and a strange tingling filled your body, like your very blood had turned to static.
And then you were back on your own two feet, standing face to chest with the red and black pinstriped suit you knew so well.
Unnaturally large claws had you by the shoulders and you tilted your head up, taking in the full view of a very angry Radio Demon.
Alastor towered over you, his antlers spread wide, his eyes turning like radio dials, and he lifted you up like you weighed nothing until you were face to face and your feet were dangling several feet in the air.
“What the fuck was that?” he snarled, his voice even more full of static than you were used to.
Your eyes went wide at the use of vulgarity from him. You could count with your two useless wings how many times you had heard him swear before and never had it been directed at you.
When you didn’t answer right away, he shook you, calling you by your real name rather than darling, which he never did. He demanded an answer but all you could manage was a little whimper before you broke.
Your chin quivered and you felt the swell of tears in your eyes as a sob squeezed your chest and erupted out.
“I’m sorry,” you choked out and then slowly, ever so gently, you felt yourself being lowered to the ground and then your face was pressed against the soft fabric of Alastor’s suit. His bow tie tickled the side of your face and his scent, heady with Spanish moss and cypress, and some other uniquely Earthy smell that was entirely him, filled your senses.
“Darling,” he said quietly, “my darling . . . why?”
You could barely breath through your sobs, let alone speak, so it took you a moment to gather the strength to answer. Clutching at the back of his jacket, you pressed your face into him harder, trying to hide your reasoning, bury your shame, pretend like every pathetic part of you didn’t exist.
But he had seen, hadn’t he? He had watched you take that step, had come up here to find you and seen that final microsecond when there was nothing but air between you and the ground below.
And he had altered reality to bring you back to him. To save you.
Half of you hoped that meant he really did love you like you loved him. Like he promised every day that he did, even though you never quite believed it.
The other half of you whispered an insipid little lie that was too tempting to not consider  . . . that this whole stunt of yours was just another distraction.
“I don’t want to be a bother anymore,” you finally whispered, hiccupping and choking as you struggled to speak.
Alastor went stiff around you, and you thought then that he would finally push you away. Agree that you really were just a bother. That if he were to ever shackle himself to another soul, it certainly wouldn’t be to such a weak little wretch as yourself.
Instead, his long, clawed fingers grasped you by your chin, forcing you to look up at him. And though his expression was often hard to read, the strain in his smile showed anger while the burning in his ruby eyes showed pain.
“What gave you the idea that you could do such a thing? That I would allow it?”
“Wha . . . what?”
“You’re mine now, darling.” He pulled on your chin, forcing you on tip toe as he brought your face closer to him. “You belong to me and I don’t let what belongs to me just fly away. It seems you have forgotten that.”
His claws were digging into your cheeks and along your jaw line, stinging and threatening, even as he brought his lips down and gave you the gentlest kiss on the forehead.
 
“Perhaps I need to remind you of that,” he whispered to you, his voice low and tender, crackling with a passion you couldn’t misplace. He was angry, you realized, oh yes he was furious with you. But as the world went fuzzy once again, and you felt the familiar sensation of melting into shadow, and your soul blended with his, you could literally feel that burning rage inside of him being twisted and morphed into more direct emotions. Lust and desire filled what was left of your identity as Alastor transported you through the ceiling and walls of the hotel and into your room.
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Now this was flying.
Alastor had sat you at the foot of your bed, making quick work of removing your underwear, lifting your pleated skirt above your hips, and kneeling before you, all before you had come down from the bizarre and disorienting high of being nothing but shadow with him.
Now you were reduced to a shell of a person, thoughtless and detached from your feelings and in the best of ways, as Alastor’s tongue made your nervous system aware of nothing else but the bundle of nerves between your legs.
Your knees were resting on his shoulders and already shaking as his tongue twisted and lapped at your clit, occasionally giving the swollen pearl a hard suck, as two fingers pumped into your core, working to pull a second climax from you.
Distantly you were aware of the flutter of your wings; a helpless reflex, along with the tremble of your legs. Tears streamed down your cheeks, though you paid that no mind either. Even if you had noticed them, you wouldn’t be able to place which emotion was drawing them from your eyes.
You only knew that this feeling; the intense physical sensation of Alastor turning you into a whimpering, wanton mess, allowed you to dissociate in the best of ways and everything that had tormented you to the point of standing on that cliff’s edge was completely forgotten.
The fingers of one of your hands wrapped themselves in a white-knuckled grip around his antler while your other hand found purchase in his red locks and you sobbed out his name as you came again.
Just as your walls began to clench, Alastor pulled himself from your clutches, leaving your cunt to clench needfully onto nothing. The abrupt lack of touch right at the beginning of your orgasm was torture and in his absence you pressed your legs together, searching for any friction that would allow for a fraction of the satisfaction his tongue and fingers should be giving you.  
“Now, now, dear,” Alastor tutted, and you felt your legs forced back apart. “Remember, I’m here to make a point. And that point is . . .” You looked down to see tendrils of shadows spreading your legs farther open, tangling themselves around your thighs and hips. “. . . You’re mine.” He began undoing the top of his trousers. “And  any rash decisions,” he pushed his trousers down below his waist, “like trying to jump off buildings,” he pulled his cock free and you salivated at the sight of its red and swollen tip already weeping pre-cum for you, “or pleasuring yourself without permission,” he leaned over you, his tense and wicked smile inches away from your lips as his took a painful fistful of your hair, “will be met with severe punishments.”
You swallowed, daring to meet his eyes with your own submissive, watery ones, and nodded.
“There’s my darling I know and cherish,” he said sweetly. His fingers left your hair and traced along your jaw until they came to your lips.
“And now that we’re at an understanding,” he snapped his fingers and your clothes vanished, “let’s see how well you can take your punishment.”
His cock thrust into you as black tendrils slithered their way up the rest of your nude body, pinning you in place. They teased and stroked every erogenous zone with lovely tenderness, their touch soothing and affectionate even as they forced you to near absolute stillness. In stark contrast, Alastor pounded into you, stretching you to the point of burning and igniting the still burning embers of your last orgasm that Alastor had left unfinished.
You came within seconds, your walls spasming hard against the fat width of his cock. Alastor drove on as if he hadn’t noticed, deep enough to hit the blind end of your depths with every forward thrust. The bruising combination left a dull cramp in your belly as your climax went on for several more moments, an intense combination of pleasure and pressure.   
After the quaking within your core subsided, you went limp within the clutches of the shadows. Three orgasms as intense as the ones you had just experienced were more than enough to placate your mind and body and your teary eyes now began to droop with sleepiness.
And yet Alastor was clearly not finished with you.
“Alastor,” you pleaded, knowing he still hadn’t come but you intended to beg for him to be a little gentler with you until he had. Instead of letting you speak, however; a tendril that had been near your throat laced itself through your open mouth and synched itself around your head, effectively gagging you.
The only response you got from your lover was an angry red glow of his eyes as they narrowed onto you, before he gripped your thighs with his claws and continued on with his brutal pace.
Too much, too much, too much, you internally screamed, a fresh torrent of hot tears burning down your cheeks. Your teeth sunk into the meat of the tentacle between your lips and you strained against the ones holding your wrists down to the bed.
The brutal pace of your punishment went on for several more minutes; an eternity for your overstimulated sex. Everything between your ribs and your thighs burned and ached from the ceaseless, intrusive rhythm of Alastor’s body against yours. Inside and out, he continued to savagely ravish you, until there was nothing else for you to do but begin to silently cry and take the punishment he was dolling out.
Alastor pulled out of you with a suddenness that both relieved and confused you. Your throbbing cunt ached from what it had just been through but as your eyes met his, you felt an emptiness within you. Still wrapped in tentacles, you glanced down at his glistening cock before you looked back up at the sharp tooth smile on the face of the man that you feared and loved above all else.
He still looked as pissed off as ever but there was a softness at the corner of his eyes that hinted at concern and you knew him well enough to know he was worried he might have taken things to far.
As you felt the shadow tentacles begin to loosen around you, you felt a emotion so long-forgotten you almost didn’t recognize it.
Confidence.
And with that thought, you wordlessly turned yourself around until your lay on your belly, exposing your backside and the tiny pink wings you knew Alastor loved to play with whenever he was angry.
A moment came and went and you were just beginning to wonder if you had misread the owner of your soul. You opened your mouth to speak his name once more but before you could utter a syllable, you felt your arms yanked back by the wrists and a powerful tendril wrap around your throat, holding you face down into the mattress.
The shadows that were still around your hips tightened and forcefully lifted your ass into the air and you braced yourself a second before Alastor’s cock slammed back into you, filling you back up to completion and eviscerating that feeling of emptiness.
Tired and spent as you were, you moaned aloud and squeezed his member with every last bit of strength you had within your spongey walls.  
You felt the long, slow drag of his retreating cock sliding against every sensitive bundle of nerves inside of you before another snap of Alastor’s hips had it rocketing back into you.
“Say it,” he commanded and you shuddered with your whole body, knowing what he wanted to hear.
“I’m your darling,” you replied, breathless and yet moaning again as he rewarded you with another thrust.
“And?”
“I belong to you.” He matched this thrust with a gentle stroke of a shadow across the membrane of one of your wings. “Mmmmmm, more,” you begged, as your wings gave a tiny, involuntary flap at the feather light touch.
But he had stilled behind you, waiting for your needfulness to build until you were begging.
“Please,” you sobbed out, feeling your chin quiver as all the emotions of the night came rushing back to you. “I’m sorry, Al’. I’m so sorry.”
As you spoke, the touching of your wings and the powerful movement of his cock began anew. You blabbered on, afraid if you stopped talking, the pleasant sensation of his touch within you and above you would end.
“I love you. I’ll never leave you. I’ll never even think about leaving you ever again. Not in anyway. Not even when your angry with me. Not even when I hate myself. Because I’m yours and I’ll always be yours. I’m so sorry, Alastor. Please don’t stop. Please, you feel so good. Fill me up, love. Because I’m your darling and I’ll be good from now on, please just fill me up. I’m your good girl and I love you and I want to feel you inside me. Please, please, oh God Al’, you feel so good, I’m – I’m – I-”
With a painful pull on your wrists you felt all the way into your shoulders, you felt him spill his seed within you as his body tense and every shadow of his went impossibly taut around you. The heat of his cum burned your walls and spilled down your inner thighs, coating you and marking you as his, and you came along with him, screaming into the sheets. Every tendril bruised into your skin, leaving marks around your throat, breasts, wings, hips, and thighs, as Alastor lost all control, even as he continued to pound into you with an uneven and desperate pace.
Everything blurred as you came down from the high together. You felt your muscles turn to jelly and give out in the final moments of your climax, just in time to feel Alastor finally still and begin to soften before he pulled out.
After several serene moments had gone by, the sheets beneath you began to move and pull away. As if in a dream, you felt your body being moved up the bed and then Alastor’s weight joined next to you as you were tucked into bed. Without being cleaned and without a word of praise or love, which he usually included in an aftercare routine for you.
But you knew, deep within the fog of your exhausted mind, that you deserved this. You would wake up in the morning marked by the bruises and the sticky mess between your legs, and only then would you be allowed to shower and heal yourself.
“Thank you,” you murmured with closed eyes as he finished tucking you in. “I don’t think I can move after that, let alone walk.”
An amused, deep chuckle came from Alastor before he pinched your cheek hard enough to make your eyes snap back open.
He got up from the bed, now fully dressed, and straightened his bow tie and monocle before marching towards the door with a pleased and arrogant look on his face.
“Good, my darling. That’s good. Let’s see you try to pull that nonsense again now that your legs don’t work. Sweet dreams,” he added as he opened the bedroom door and gave you one last warning smile before he slammed the door behind him, hard enough to knock a few decorations off the walls.
You sighed as you heard a lock clicking into place, knowing his point was made, and that he was still very much angry with you. But the storm had passed, for both of you. You relaxed into the soft pillow and closed your eyes, the first smile in days touching your lips as you drifted off to sleep.
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bobur-the-berry-guy · 5 months ago
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Tenjiku boys and winter activities!
•ft. Izana, Kakucho, Ran, Rindou, Shion, Mochi
•part 1 - toman boys
part 3 - koko, inui, taiju, sanzu, hanma & kisaki, in the making!
•requests are open!
• Lowk forgot to post ut yesterday my bad
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Inside
Staying cozy at home during winter was something Izana has always preferred, especially now that he has you to stay cozy with. His home is now bright with christmas warm lights and shiny decorations, the smell of homecooked meal coming from the kitchen. A home is still somewhat foreign to him, but not unwelcome at all. He's started a new little homely tradition too - cooking together once a week. It's really just him trying to do a new recipe for dinner and you keeping him company in the kitchen, but he likes it that way. He likes having you around, making the apartment more of a home. Would it really be a home without you? To him, not really. You've made your way into his heart, keeping him warm and cozy when it's freezing. Anyway, the dinner's ready. Have you tried red sause spaghetti? Hopefully you like them because Izana's getting experimental with it. Tiny baby tomatoes and basil leaves mixed in with the sauce. If you don't like the tomato slices he'd eat them for you, only if you feed them to him though. He's the big boss of the tenjiku gang, but that doesn't mean he won't want to be babied every now and them. He's not good at showing his love, but he's learning. Just fot you.
Rindou has never liked being outside in the cold, freezing his ass off. Why would he be growing icicles from his nose when he can be warm, toasty and lazing around at home? Sure, he's a party animal but he still wants to have a slow day every now and then, especially so during winter. He had all he needed inside - food, drinks and company. Even if it gets a bit boring being inside all day, he still has that little tradition with you - making homemade alchocol. Now don't get it wrong, he loves his expensive luxury stuff, but it's just different when he's done the work himself with you right by him. So every week he knows what to look foward to, and it gives him energy to pass the time by. Waiting for the said day, deciding what to try making, experimenting with new recipes, trying what you've already made.. His favourite, though, is the chocolate liquor. The first one you made together. He keeps it hidden, taking it out for just the special occasions - the holidays, achievements, and sometimes just because you're together. He's still a little flustered at the affection - his glasses are fogging up with just you leaning on him when you're thinking on what you could add, tiny little kisses make him unable to talk for a few minutes. To him, that's also a part of the tradition. Not that he's complaining tho
Just like his little brother, Ran has always preferred being at home when the weather drops. He's always being at l home anyway, you beung there just makes it better. And if it's cold it just gives him the excuse to cuddle you all day. "Its soo cold" or "come hug me, im freezing" are things you hear on the regular in winter. He's not above whining and begging if that's what would make you go back to the big, messy bed. Out of any time he could do that, his favourite is when there's no other soul awake other than him. He hates being awake at anything later than 11:30pm, much more at these ungodly hours, but the ambience makes it good. The room is dark and quiet. The muted light from the street lamps illuminates the falling snow, his patterned curtains leaving ornamented shadows across the walls. The world is quiet. Only sounds he can hear are the cars apasing by every now and then, the wind murmuring gently and your quiet, peaceful breathing. He can feel the countless soft blankets around him, brushing his cheek, and you warming him inside out. Feeling your skin agaist his, hand agaist back, leg over leg - it makes him feel like he's melting. Brushing your hair out of your face just to see how peacuful you look, next to him. Sure, he hates waking up at night, but having you there makes him almost want to wake up every now and then, just for a few minutes.
Outside
If its snowing outside expect to be dragged out by Shion the second he sees it. There's not a force on this earth to stop him from plopping face first on the snow, no matter how little it really is. He feels like he sees it rarely enough to give him a reason to run out to bask in it when it falls. He has an annual tradition - every year when first snow falls he must catch a snowflake with his mouth. It's silly, he knows, but he doesn't intend to break it. It's for luck! Even if the first snow has already fallen while he was asleep that won't stop him - he's just going to take a bite out of the snow. It's totally normal wdym Which puts you in the situation you're dealing with currently - a sick Shion. He's as healthy as a bull and his immune system is unbeatable, but that doesn't save him for catching the flu once a year. He's whiny and he doesn't shut up even if his throat hurts. He's constantly too warm, too cold, the blanket is too heavy and the air is too dry. With other words, he's insufferable. That won't stop him playing the sickness card to have you around longer, though. "Stay here please" and such will be all you're hearing for the next few days, even if afterwards he pretends it never happened. He's still grateful, even if he's bad at showing it. He's just waiting for his turn to take care of you when you're sick.
Even in the dead if winter Mochi still needs to walk around the city, even if its just for a little bit. Movement clears his head. Strolling around, earphones playing something for background, the cold air nipping his face. To him, that's his routine and that's his want. He's lazy every now and then and doesn't want to, but he knows that then he'd be restless. That's why he's so grateful to have you going outside with him. No matter the weather, no matter where or for how long - you being there makes it so much better. He's even started planning out a route to take you through every now and then. Stopping by this cafe or that bakery, looking trough this shop, going around that place. He wants to spoil you back in his own way. He can't help it - he feels like he's melting! Not that he's actually going to say it tho Seeing you dressing up just to go out with him, reminding him to take a hat, holding his arm while strolling around.. He'd never really say it, but to him that means the world. And he'll always return the gesture.
If there's one thing Kakucho likes about winter, it's all the holidays. Cristmas, New years, all the festivities - they give the freezing cold life. He's never been openly just waiting for them to come but he's never been good at hiding this either. Out of everything, he likes New Years the best. Who doesn't like the new start, yeah? As solitary as he is, he's never missed a new years gathering. The parties aren't his strong suit but they still bring him joy. The atmosphere of it is something he always forward to. The loud giggles and the low voices, people having conversations bumbling around the room. The muted light coming from a few different sources scattered across the rooms. The music playing loud enough to drown out your thoughts. He loves these but he prefers to just watch. And he's glad he has you to keep him company watching the party unfold. Even if he has to keep an eye in you drinking or go back more than usual he'd never complain. He's just waiting for the fireworks. Flaming shooting stars and sparlking blazing flowers exploding around the sky with a loud bang and dazzling, untouchable colors. Colorful comets howling across the sky. Brocades and crackles popping like popcorn. Fish of fire swimming beside them. Strobes flashing. And finally the biggest ones come, everyone waiting for them. Boquet of luminous hot chrysanthemums, peonies and dahlias paiting the sky in stars and the wind swishing around them. In all of that Kakucho was entranced not by the firework show, but by you. On your toes to see it all better, the gentle wind ruffling a strand or two of your hair, mouth agape and eyes wide open. He can see the reflection of the stars in your eyes and its better than watching it himself, he thinks. He's got you right there, next to him, looking up at the fireworks, hand in hand with him. He's never been superstitious, but for once he understands why some of them are created. You won't refuse the new years kiss, yeah?
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jamil-s-wifey · 2 years ago
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If you're taking any scenario request. Maybe could I request funny/silly one where Leona and his S/O are married and live in the Royal Palace. Leona's S/O has gotten lost somehow in their own home and when found their response is "This place is too damn big I'm sorry!"
You have NO idea how much I love these types of fics! Wholesome crackheadedness at its finest✨ We love a spouse with 0 orientation skills. (I'd know, I get lost in supermarkets) This was ONE OF THE FUNNIEST THINGS I've EVER written. I hope you enjoy!
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"What the actual fuck."
A turn here. A turn there.
Oh, would you look at that - the exact same vase you passed 5 minutes ago. But was that really the same vase? Or was it its evil twin, trying to further confuse you, only for you to get lost even more and die of starvation, eventually BECOMING ONE WITH THE PALACE...
God, whoever built this palace should have their head on a stake. Haha, that sounded a lot like the Red Queen of Hearts. Perhaps Riddle was rubbing off on you. You two did text occasionally since graduating from NRC.
Speaking of graduation, you married Leona. (yay!) And it's not like you weren't happy. Life was relatively peaceful. You two moved back to the palace. Arrangements had begun for you two to take over a certain part of Sunset Savannah, as something akin to a *Peerage. (They had their own name for it, you are currently far too annoyed to remember.) A lot of (semi-forced) communication set the road to reconciliation between the two brothers. (Admittedly a very long road. A road that puts Gulliver's travels to shame.) The Royal Family™️ accepted you with open hearts. (albeit a tad wary at first)
Really there was only one major problem.
The ROYAL PALACE IS LIKE A GODDAMN LABYRINTH. And that's rich, given your history of painting the white roses with Ace and Deuce in Heartsabyul's maze. So here you are, lost.
Scratch that.
Lost: again.
And all you wanted to do was find Cheka's room. You had a gift for the little cub.
"An architectural masterpiece, my ass. This is an architectural disaster. A disaster with a capital D. D for Vitamin D - what I won't be getting, because I'm trapped within these walls, where the SUN CAN'T REACH ME-"
Okay. Calm down. It's not that bad, sure there isn't a soul in sight, but you're bound to stumble upon somebody at some point, right? There had to be servants, or guards, or somebody! UNLESS! This is all an elaborate plan to get rid of you.
Aha! That must be it. The Royal Family wants you dead and they intend to make it seem like an accident! But Leona wouldn't allow that, right? He loves you! Dearly! You're his spouse, his one and only! Ah, cruel fate.
Is it just you...or are these walls moving in on each other. So this IS an assassination attempt! And you presented yourself on a silver platter. Good job, s/o. Splendid work. A royal for a few months and you're already about to be assassinated. Your name shall remain the book of "Dumbest ways to die." Goodbye cruel world-
"S/o."
Leona's voice rang through the empty hallway, "What are you doing out here."
Ah! And so tragedy was avoided once more!
"Leona, my LOVE! Thank God."
"Did you just- get lost in the palace... again?", his eyes read annoyance but his tone was teasing.
"It's not MY fault this place is so damn big, what do you need all this space for anyways? Indoor badminton? Hide and Seek or Die?"
"Definitely that last one. That's how we get rid of our enemies."
"AHA! I knew it! So this IS an assassination attempt!"
He simply rolled his eyes, pulling you towards him to wrap an arm around your waist and kiss you on the forehead.
"This isn't an assassination attempt. You did this yourself. It's called idiocy."
"You should build a better palace."
"What I should do is put a collar on you. With a tracking device on it. Like a pet."
"Oh, Leona~ Who knew you were into that~"
"Next time I'm leaving you here to rot."
"Then I'll haunt you to Hell and back."
He smirked, pinching your cheek as you were both making your way far from the cursed looping corridor.
"At least you won't be able to get lost."
"I told you, it's not my fault."
"Nah, of course not. The Palace is just cursed."
"EVIDENTLY."
You both knew this isn't the last time you'll be getting lost. And Leona was seriously considering the tracking device.
Perhaps he'd already ordered it too.
You were about to find out.
*Peerage - collective noun for titles like Duke, Duchess, Count, Earl etc. Comes from "Peers of the Realm" where one could hold one or more of these titles. It differs from monarchy to monarchy. THAT'S YOUR WORD FOR THE DAY FOLKS!
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kentoavenue · 2 years ago
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grateful - gojo satoru
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"whatever you're thinking of, save it for tomorrow. go to sleep."
you release a heavy exhale, before pulling your arm from under your pillow and flipping over, eyes meeting stark blue ones.
you've always been mesmerized by how sky-like his eyes are, but even more so when even with the lights off, they still manage to glow. as if heaven itself lied behind those orbs.
satoru is blessed, you think. but you feel even more blessed than him for being the only one who gets to see him like this—so at peace and laid bare for you.
"you're not asleep either," you reply with half-lidded eyes.
you're tired, sure, but there was no way you'd find sleep anytime soon. not with the war waging in your head right now.
"tell me what's going on in that beautiful head of yours," satoru says, bringing his hand up to tuck back a lock of hair behind your ear. he rests his hand there, too.
you suck in a quiet breath, not sure how to proceed.
ever since he came back, you've been holding him more dear than usual, afraid he'd slip past your fingers again. you don't tell him that, though. sure, he knows it anyway, but saying it out loud seems like it'd jinx everything to hell again.
"i'm thinking of you."
he blinks up at you, silver eyelashes fluttering against his eyelid. god, he's beautiful.
"what about me?"
you should be grateful.
grateful that you have the strongest as your other half. grateful that he doesn't need to look over his shoulder. grateful that you never had to truly worry if satoru was going to make it home some nights.
grateful that unlike most other sorcerers, satoru never had to walk hand-in-hand with death. grateful that death hasn't knocked on his door even when the world fell to chaos. grateful that he's still here with you, breathing and warm and alive.
but you're not grateful tonight. not with the battle he's announced in several hours.
you don't want to say it, but you say it anyway, "don't be a hero."
a silent pause, before, "baby, you—"
"no, let me say it, satoru. i have to say it out loud," you whisper.
his hand leaves your cheek and slides down to rest above your waist. you relish the feeling as much as you can, commiting to memory the weight and warmth of it. you wish you two could stay like this forever.
"okay," he nods, shifting closer.
it's quiet enough that you can hear your own heartbeat, maybe even his, and you hope he can hear them too.
"i would never tell you not to go and save megumi," you start. you hesitate for a moment, but continue, voice quivering ever so slightly. "but you have to remember your life means just as much."
satoru's listening, but doesn't say anything. instead, his hand finds yours and he brings the back of your hand towards his lips, pressing a soft kiss to your knuckles.
"thank you for worrying about me, but you can stop now."
"are you hearing me, satoru?" your fingers grasp his tighter, a silent demand for his full attention. he gives it to you. "i'm asking you to please come home tomorrow night."
"i will, baby." he plants a quick kiss on your nose. "i'm the strongest, or have you forgotten?"
you clench your jaw slightly, wondering if you believe him or not.
you decide you don't. not enough.
but you're not going to ask him to promise you anything either. not when he already carries so much burden alone. not when you know how easily promises get broken as of late.
"i just—." you pause to look at him, really look at him. and you pray to god that you remember each and every delicate feature of his. every flaw, every dip, every scar. "i just want you to remember that i love you, always. and i won't make you promise it, but i hope with every piece of my soul that i see you tomorrow. and the day after. and the day after that, too."
satoru huffs out a short laugh, lips pulling apart to form a smile.
"you underestimate me, again." he plants another kiss, to your forehead, now.
"i'm not," you murmur.
"yeah, you are." he raises both your hands, fingers intertwining in the air. "you're underestimating my abilities, you're underestimating how much i love you, and most of all, you're underestimating the lengths i'd go to just to come back home to you."
it's not often that the satoru gojo shows raw emotion, but... here he right now doing so. he's offering you his still beating heart in his hands—and you take it. you swear you'll keep it safe with you forever.
"just—when you're out there, remember i love you, more than anything."
you're holding satoru's gaze intently, before his' drop to your lips, then back up again.
"and i love you even more than that, my girl." satoru presses one last kiss, to your lips this time. “i’ll make it home to you, i swear it.”
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respectthepetty · 4 months ago
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12 Anticipated Thai BLs for 2025
As usual, I'm excited for ALL the GLs (Cranium, Only You, 3 Minutes 2 Love, Reverse with You, Buy My Boss, Let's Kick this Love, No Romeo, and so many more!), but I'm making my annual list of the BLs I'm excited for this year with brief reasons why I'm looking forward to them, and it includes some I've previously mentioned in my GMMTV 2025 Hot Tops. However, I must first look back at my 2024 list and see if those BLs were worth my anticipation:
The Next Prince - I still haven't gotten it, so 2025 better be the year!
Jack & Joker: U Steal My Heart - Great! Amazing! Loved it!
Spare Me Your Mercy - We don't talk about her.
Wandee Goodday - I have my issues, but it was a fun ride. *wink*
Choco Milk Shake 2 - The production team said it was never planned, you know, like a liar.
Time of Fever - Beautiful! Astounding! I NEED MORE!
My Doctor/Mr. Doctor - I'm probably never getting it. I need a moment to collect myself.
Live in Love - I was only showing up for the colors, and it delivered them plus a lot more crazy nonsense.
Red Peafowl - It was all a lie, and apparently we are never getting it.
Love Upon a Time - I don't want to talk about what happened, but I better get it this year!
Love Puzzle - Probably not getting it, and I'm not okay about it.
Peaceful Property - Fantastic! Divine! Best thing I watched this year!
Sunset x Vibes - I showed up for MosBank, and I got MosBank, so I was thrilled!
The Heart Killers - I'm having the time of my life!
Bonus: Your Dear Daddy - WHERE IS MY MAN FLUKE?! GIVE HIM TO ME RIGHT NOW!
Now time for this year's list!
Honorable Mention: MosBank & JoongDunk
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I will show up every year excited about the same thing — my ships! I'm getting Joong and Dunk in Dare You to Death if they don't get divorced before then, and I'm getting Mos and Bank in Be My (Soul)Mate if they aren't busy planning a wedding by then. I know JoongDunk's piece is about murders and making out which are two of my favorite things, but I don't even know what the plot is for MosBank's series because all I know is it isn't Big Dragon 2, but it doesn't matter anyway since I'm always happy to see my favorites!
A Dog and a Plane
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2024 came for my throat and my heart with some really heavy shows, and in comparison to the rest of this list, I'm banking on this show to be my one bright spot in 2025. I need at least one show to make me laugh while it's ripping out my heart, and I think this is the show for the job.
Goddess Bless You From Death
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This show scares me, and it might give me nightmares, but it involves murders and making out, so I'm effing with los espookys for this one. Y'all can have Khemjira though. I ain't that brave.
My Sweetheart Jom
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Saint, in a BL again. That's it. That's the reason.
Memoir of Rati
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I expect only happy endings from GMMTV, but I'm worried about this one's ending, yet I must see what happens. It has history, politics, and class dynamics, so as much as I'm happy to see Great, Inn, Aou, and Boom in this, I'm also very nervous.
Love Carved in the Moonlight
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It seemed like poly was a possibility, which I know is a lie, but also, this looked beautiful, and I'm not just referring to the men. It's another period piece, so I might just be in for a Thai history lesson in 2025.
I'm the Most Beautiful Count
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People are upset that the pilot trailer seemed to make light of the source material, but I have faith this adaptation will do justice to the webtoon and give us a leading man worth fighting for.
Interminable
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I sense a lengthy series brewing from Idol Factory for this one, so I think we might not see it until later this year or 2026, but I also think it will be worth the wait since there's no way Billy and Babe won't make me teary-eyed with a plot like this.
Ticket to Heaven
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It involves Catholicism; therefore, it will hurt me. However, as a Catholic, the Church has instilled in me that if it isn't painful, then it isn't good for me, so if the show makes me cry every episode, I think the Church would approve.
Knock Out
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It's Gym Bros BL adjacent meaning men will be in a gym, half-naked, and working out, which is good enough for me! Also, they're color coded, so who am I to deny small blessings?
The Wicked Game
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We are getting two GLs and a BL about bodyguards falling in love with their clients, but just like all the vampire series we were supposed to get in 2024 yet only got two, I'm wondering who will be first and how they will turn out. I think all of them will be great, but I am especially looking forward to Daou getting bruised up for love.
Love of Silom
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Up and Poom were a surprise for me in 2024 with My Stand-In, so from what I know about the plot dealing with a cop and a single dad, I think they will do just as great with their second series as they did with the first. I am patently waiting to be in my feels again because of them.
Me & Who
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I need to watch Big kiss men like I need air. I need to watch Big gently place his hand on another man's neck like I need water. I need this show. Now.
Bonus: Mandate
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Did anyone watch 2012's Political Animals with Sebastain Stan who played TJ Hammond, the bisexual son of the former President of the United States and the current Secretary of State, who had a secret affair with an older married and closeted US Senator?
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Anyone? No?
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Well, can I get something similar, Thailand? Is that too much to ask? I don't know, but I'm going to ask for it anyway! Let me have it! Give me what I deserve.
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muneca-lemon-steppa · 1 year ago
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Mooooo ! I love you so much bby 💕 my I request one with Alfie with the touch starved prompts “you never have to earn my affection-not now, not ever” and “I’m never more at peace than when I’m in yours arms”? Thank you lovely❤️❤️
My baby girl!!!!!!! Ugh thank you so much for sending this in. Did my heart ache writing this? Yes. Did my stomach hurt? Also yes. Am I sorry for it? NO. WE DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR EMO HOURS IN THIS HOUSE. Hehehe Anyway I love ya so much I hope you enjoyyyyyy.
100 Follower Celebration: Your Love is Enough
Alfie Solomons x Fem!Reader
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There were many perks that came with being Alfie's woman. While there was certainly a good deal of danger lurking around, there was an undeniable air of safety you had due to all the eyes watching. You got access to all the hot goings on around the city. You lived comfortably. And above all, you got to love Alfie Solomons fully and purely and unabashed. There was only one downside really... the talk.
It was no secret that you were significantly younger than Alfie. It was something you and Alfie never shied away from and didn't feel a need to. Regardless of any age difference, you and Alfie understood each other on a cosmic level, a way no one else could. You loved him with your whole heart and soul and Alfie would burn down the world if you asked him to. You were one. And anyone who truly knew you and Alfie knew that this was true love. That this was the type of love and devotion that epics were written about and empires crumbled over. But there were always going to be people who didn't know. Always going to be people who didn't understand.
You were perusing fabric patterns in the shop down the street one early afternoon, looking for the final pattern to add to a quilt you were making for Ollie's soon to be born first child. You delicately touched the cotton blends along an aisle, imagining how it would look along the squares you had already picked, taking mental note as to what was available.
"I just cannot imagine what he sees in her. I mean... she is a child isn't she?"
Your ears perked up to the tone. It was Mrs. Vorsed from down the corner, the one you waved to every morning without even a smile in return. Another voice responded, "You know how men are. They just want a little toy to play house with until they find a wife."
Who on earth could they be talking about?
"Mr. Solomons needs a real woman in his home. My Portia knows what it means to be a lady of the house, and knows her place. I mean that girl he is shacked up with... I can hear her shouts and laughter from down the street! What does she know about keeping a home, much less keeping a man?"
A snicker erupts, "Well I'm sure she won't last long. He'll tire of her eventually when he realizes what he truly needs. Then Portia can swoop right in!"
The cackles fade away with the sharp chops of heavy footed steps. Despite your efforts, the knot in your throat never went down. You lungs refused to take in breath as the words spun in your mind. How could they say those things so confidently? They didn't even know you. They never even stepped foot into the house, how could they know how you keep it? Alfie never said more than a good morning to Mrs. Vorsed. How could they know anything about you or Alfie? Yet their words kept spinning and spooling around in your mind. What if... what if they were right?? What if people saw something that you couldn't see? What if you had deluded yourself into thinking that Alfie was truly happy and in love with you? What if he was unhappy but didn't want to tell you out of duty. It all became too much in your chest, and you left the store without your fabric, but the weight of the world on your chest.
That evening Alfie could not wait to get home to you. Every evening Alfie nearly buzzed at the prospect of coming home to see your face again, and wrap himself around you, getting as close as possible. You made his day better. You made his life brighter and joyful and meaningful. It made all the business and badness worth it. Stepping through the threshold with a press to the mezuzah, Alfie calls out, "Sweet girl! I'm home! You in the kitchen darling?"
He hears you call back and smiles wide, stomach growling hungry for supper and you. Taking off his coat and hat he ambles into the kitchen, watching you stir something magical in the massive soup pot. "My dove ,my angel, my joy, what are you doing? Making food for the Royal Navy are we?"
You turn to him, and he can clearly see that something is wrong. Your lips are quivering and poorly attempting to portray a smile, and your eyes are glassy and red rimmed. He feels a stab in his chest, "Now wait a minute treacle... what's got you crying?"
You wiped your cheek and turned away, "I'm not crying."
With a scoff he grabs your chin gently, turning you to face him, "I thought we didn't lie to each other my sweet. Especially since you're the worst liar since the Garden of Eden. Why are you crying? Come on now confess."
You shrugged as Alfie's hands moved up and down your arms, "It's nothing. Stupid really I shouldn't be crying."
"Nah nah. It ain't stupid if it's got my sweet girl crying like that. Out with it."
The tears kept falling, though you tried to keep an even tone, "I just... I heard some women talking. Mrs. Vorsed and another lady."
Alfie rolled his eyes, "Always a bad sign. C'mon what else."
You sniffled, "And... well... they said that... I wasn't good enough for you. That I didn't know how to be a good woman to you. And that you would be better off with someone else. That you would soon grow tired of me. That I'm not deserving of you, and Portia Vorsed would be a better match for you."
The tears started coming harder, and you couldn't help the shaking of your body. Alfie's stomach dropped, and rage replaced it. Alfie shook your shoulders a bit in his passion, "What the fuck is wrong with them? Treacle, Mrs. Vorsed is the worst gossip in Camden, and doesn't know anything about anything. She hasn't got anything better to do but talk absolute shit. Portia, right? She is the silliest woman in town, she can't even do basic arithmetic because she's too busy being an idiot. I mean fuck me treacle I can barely say good morning to Mrs. Vorsed without getting proper fucking agitated!"
Alfie kissed your forehead and brought you to his chest, "YOU are the one for me. I don't give a shit what Mrs. Vorsed or what any other decrepit woman or idiot man thinks. You are my life. You are my stars and my moon and my sun alright? You don't have to be 'good enough' for me. Fuck you just are. You never have to earn my love. You've always had it. Even before I knew you my old and brittle heart was yours. You got that?"
You nodded, the tears pooling in his shirt. Alfie pulled you away from him to look into your eyes. "And treacle I don't even think Mrs. Vorsed can see more than a meter in front of her so she probably has no clue who she is talking about."
You laughed despite the tears and Alfie grinned. All he wanted to do every day was to make you smile. He was convinced that was what he was put on this earth to do. You put your hand to his face, feeling him lean into the warmth of your palm. "I just want to love you and care for you like you do me. I just worry that I don't do enough sometimes."
He grabbed your hand, kissing your fingertips, "Ah my sweet. I'm never more at peace than when I'm in your arms. I'm never more at home than when you're next to me. The whole business could go to shit and I'd still be the richest man in the world because I have the greatest treasure in you. And I mean that my love. You believe your old man right?"
You nod. The lump in your throat finally dissapated and the weight melted away. There was truly no love like Alfie's and yours. People could talk all they want. People could make any assumptions they wanted. That didn't change what was true. And what was true was that you and Alfie belonged to each other and would for all of eternity.
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ro-bee · 4 months ago
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Hi!
Could maybe say something more about your Goat Realm?
What is story of Puppy narinder here?
What heretics look like here and how are they behaviour? (I'm curious about it because I love these beans. I'm all ears to any littlest detail)
How other bishops look like?
And anyway anything. I'm all ears to all ramble!
Drink your water!
HELLOOO
It is time for the goatverse yap section ! Everybody cheers!!
Anyway little disclaimers :
1_ is very work in progress... Unfortunately all my focus is on those two gay furries and not much on the world so I don't have many drawings to show :(
2_ it's heavy... And I mean there are strong themes and stuff (I'm not gonna go in details here) ... You'll see it better when I finish one of my many projects but it will require a lot of time... Like a lot, sorry... Anyway :)
Goat's world is very harsh. Here we live by the philosophy of kill or be killed very often, despite that there are some people that manage to live in piece and tranquility (example: goat's family and people that don't venerate any specific bishops or that venerate Kiran)
The world is ruled by the 5 bishops (these design are still concepts expect our beloved wolf lol)
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Four of them command on different regions, Kiran being the god of death rules the purgatory
He doesn't have many followers like his siblings but he prefers it like that, it doesn't really matter to him because people souls would end up to him anyway.
His siblings have more of an evil alineament, they use their godhood for bad often, taking entertainment on their followers pain. Kiran is the opposite and witnessing his followers suffering fills him with sorrow, that's why he always gives his followers a painless death, is the last he can do for them... After all their souls gives him power :)
Anyway I think I already explained kiran's plan here , tldr bro is sad people suffer so he thinks that killing everything is a good solution
A little thing I want to add to kiran's backstory thing (idk):
I think that unfortunately we're not gonna have a ratau in this world, since Kiran's objective is to get rid of pain with putting everyone's soul to rest I think he won't let any previous vessel go away after failing (I'm not doing this because I hate ratau, he's my dad I love him so much)
So goat had no guide in what they were doing
Heretics here are just like regular heretics(?), if you wanted to know more about their design unfortunately I don't have anything with them :( I have some sketches in the comic I'm working on but I need to keep it as a surprise
Most of them are just regular people that want to survive...
Talking about people who want to survive:
Goat wasn't always this fucked up in the head, this whole deal changed them for the worst. Before the crown they lived a normal peaceful life with their family, when they lost everything they were forced to learn how to fight back to survive. So they spent many years running away and fighting back, they felt terrible at first but then it started to feel normal, almost enjoyable. Getting the crowns powers made killing people fun for them so yeah lol this is the evolution of goat going from calm Lyra player to killer machine, they have a loooooot of anger issues lol.
About the bishops... I'm currently drawing them better and they still have no name right now...
Their personality is the opposite of the canon one basically
The leshy is calm less impulsive
The geko is a prudent and a bit coward
The kraken is fearless and violent
The scorpion is ruthless and impulsive
Kiran is their older brother and loves them very much!! the feeling is not very mutual but anyway :)
I need to work a little bit more on them ngl
Aaaand I think this is all? Hmm idk feel free to ask more :)
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ciaomarie · 1 year ago
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ESCAPING INTO A SHIP
So what exactly made me latch onto the Sydcarmy ship like a leech on a water buffalo?
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It was unexpected (for me)! Yes, the very first meeting between Syd and Carm did make an impact. I thought "Oooh, what's this?!" However, Carmy was/is such a mess that I quickly dismissed it. And Sydney just seemed to want his professional approval and a partner in making something great after the soul-crushing failure of Sheridan. So, the first season I personally didn't feel a mutual sexual/romantic tension, more like an automatic respect and shared goals/passions. Sydney nor Carm were obviously trying to flirt. Most slow burns on TV are 100% obvious like a Jeanine and Gregory (Abbott Elementary), Nick and Jess (New Girl), Jake and Amy (Brooklyn 99), Jim and Pam (The Office)...Until Braciole Ep. 8 that is.
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S. 1 Episode 8- I won't get into everything but Carmy was desolate. Yes, he became a psycho chef and two people quit in Ep.7. However, he mourned Sydney more than Marcus. She was in his flashback/nightmare (?), then the way he told Tina that she looked like Syd (the poor pup), him texting her before opening the note from Mikey, and finally the most gorgeous locked gaze scene since Pride and Prejudice (2005). The soft lighting, the music, the colors, the mind-reading...magical. I still didn't get it initially. Silly, blind me.
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Mentorship where??? Season 2 Carm and Syd's "mentorship" dynamic is pretty much over. They are true partners and spending more time together. They're dressing alike even when not in uniform, finishing each other's sentences or talking in unison. Sydney is opening up more of herself and Carm is asking to know more. They use the ASL sign for sorry with each other and no one else until ep 10. Then there's that locker scene in ep. 1 or 2, when they almost hang out just cause. However, Carmy misses the moment and there's the return of the kicked pup face. Before being on the ship I was delighted with all of their scenes and was looking forward to the food tour. They just ROCK together on screen.
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Classic Love Triangle- Who's Claire? She's "Claire Bear", the prototypical "cool girl", who is willing to chase an socially awkward, wrong-number-giving man, despite being a pretty ER resident with no shortage of options. Did a CW writer get hired? Anyways, why was her presence used almost exclusively to put strain on Carmy and Sydney's relationship instead of The Bear generally? We could have had scenes with Nat, Richie, and Marcus arguing with Carmy about him being distracted due to Claire. They saved 99% of that for Sydney. They CHOSE to insert her in between or just after scenes with him and Claire. Showing Sydney's tattoos and her getting dressed with the stained chef's coat juxtaposed with them was WILD.
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I LOVE that both believe their interpersonal problems are solely about The Bear/business partnership. In most "slowburns" the characters are far more conscious and actively work to keep things platonic. Jeremy might be a smidge aware that Sydney means more to him after the panic attack, but I bet he's shoved it down. All he knows afterward is that being with Claire feels wrong hence ignoring her call and recommitting to SYDNEY. He could of said "You all/This/The Bear deserve my full focus etc..." He was also nagged into greeting Claire at Friends and Family, seemed anxious when Fak brought her up right before The Table scene, and also while explaining that "she's great" to Sydney. He was at peace when focused on Sydney in the moment below.
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The actors: Jeremy and Ayo's real life friendship is warms my soul and their chemistry onscreen is amazing. DON'T WASTE IT!!!
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Jeremy smolders on screen. I want to see Carmy continue to stare, yearn, fall, then eventually confess and for Sydney to reciprocate his feelings. Anyhoo, does anyone else melt when Carm means business?! They do this twice in season one and it's not good for me. Whew, I need to clean my whole house or run a few miles.
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Finally, there's so many other parallels between these two. They are fearful avoidants, have a missing or dead parent, jacked up stomachs, use sarcasm, but are generally very earnest, they struggle with anxiety, are compassionate, are perfectionists, peace-makers, give people multiple chances, are workaholics...so much more. A lot of that is also ME, lol.
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Sydcarmy is my Roman Empire. I love them as much as you can fictional characters and they deserve the most tender, angsty, triumphant, romantic best-friends to more love story.
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