#and my dms are always open <3

[neptunnes]

I keep catching myself saying how much I love being alive. I love my friends, I love my apartment, I love my boyfriend. I love myself. So genuinely these past few months are the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.

On the 31st it will be one year since I was in the hospital for attempting suicide, and so much has changed. I wish I could talk to past me and tell them that everything will work out, to stop holding on so tight to the people who are hurting you. There are people you haven’t even met yet who will love you for the real you.

I know it’s almost impossible to hear when you’re in the thick of it, but it really really can get better. It takes a lot of courage to ask for help and a lot of hard fucking work to take care of yourself and treat yourself like a human, but there is a way out.

[suntails]

[sharing/rb appreciated 💛]

my silver artbook is FINISHED and will open for preorders on 8/31 at 12pm EST!! it's been almost 3 months of work and i'm so excited to finally be able to share all the art i've worked on, PLUS a small bonus charm!

if u know silver fans,,, tell them

[jinkamuraisqueen]

@karmablacks requested this but i figured some of you guys might want to see it too, that's why i'm posting this here! so here's alan, leo, and ren's casual / pajama fullbody!! ft. kaito.. in his boxer.. (under the cut)

it's actually so fun to play around with their expressions since the range of motions on their face are so many! i personally love to make them blush (by them i mean my husband, jin HAHAHA)

but moving their body parts?? that's pretty hard for me, at least manually (it looks awkward). praying that when i have the time, i can play around some more because currently i'm being beaten by life

[alpydk]

Depressing Gale headcanon.

Is it headcanon? Either way, it is depressing. My view on the moments before he was taken by the Nautiloid.

Probably needs a TW or two... (Depression, suicide.)

A year he's spent in that tower avoiding the world. Rarely going outside, the visitors dwindled down to zero aside from Tara. Brief sending spells to his mother to inform her that he is just busy with research and will visit when he can. Sitting on that balcony watching the world he misses with all his being. A world he can no longer be a part of by nothing but the fault of his own doing. He can no longer cry, the tears of the last year having little effect on his condition. He is simply resigned to his fate.

He is going to die. He will die alone and afraid. And there is nothing he can do to stop it.

He would end things on his own terms, find some comfort in his demise, yet each day he puts it off. He could bring a dagger to his chest, looking out over the docks, the warm sunlight shining on his face, and yet despite the monster that he is, and the shadow that ebbs away at his very soul, he knows he could not hurt those people.

The people who have barely noticed he's been gone. Tara purring on his lap reminds him of what there is to live for. Even poetry has now lost its meaning. The magic items have dwindled down to nothing. Each one discovered, gifted, researched until he could use them with precision. Each one a precious memory of his life before the orb, now absorbed into that same darkness. Each memory lost, with only guilt and pain left in their wake.

And so he makes the decision as the last one disappears. That this would be it. That he can't go on living anymore, not like this. He writes the letters and places them on the desk, to Tara, to his mother. The only ones who would really care anyway. He places his bag on his back and puts on the mask that he will show as he leaves town, his head held high, his voice as charismatic as it used to be. The mask he wants people to remember him by after he is gone.

And he starts to leave. To go to a remote location where he can cause no harm. Where he can no longer hurt anyone. Where he will die.

[on-this-day-mcr]

On this day, October 14

In 2022: My Chemical Romance performed their 56th show of the 2022-2023 Swarm tour in Inglewood, California, USA. At this show, "Kill All Your Friends" was performed live for the first time since 2008, and "All the Angels" was performed live for the first time ever. For the first part of the show, a photo of a person (potentially their producer, Doug McKean) in the recording studio was taped to the drums. Later in the show, three tally marks were drawn on the drums. The majority of the songs performed at this show were from their third album, "The Black Parade". (🖤)

Watch the show here!

Adam Pantozzi

[i-like-forcefem]

hi i have a question. my boyfriend is obsessed with lolita fashion and is constantly saving dresses and skirts and sending them to me saying "i would wear this if i were a girl" ...i told him he can wear them without being a girl but he said he doesn't want to, and i said "so you want to wear hoodies and jeans for the rest of your life?" and he hesitated before saying yes and looked visibly upset after... should i say something or just start dosing him with eatrogen

Awww, that's adorable :3 Here's what I'd do: Do whatever you can to give him plausible deniability to wear the dress, maybe do a bet where the loser has to get dressed up by the winner, or maybe say that you really want to BOTH go to comic con wearing lolita, maybe do something for Halloween! (do give her time! Don't force it too much, but if she's anything like me she'll jump on the first chance you give) Cuties like that are always day-dreaming about being allowed to be a girl, to be feminine without judgement, so give her that excuse she craves!

[arsenicflame]

Hornigold's Izzy was the worst, of course. A version of himself that never escaped that terrible place, who lived his life as little more than an object. He still has nightmares about all the things Baz told them, about all the things he didn't.

It doesn't really surprise him, after the first ones, not at its root. To be Izzy Hands is to be someone's after all, though seeing his own face on someone so fundamentally different to him never gets less weird. The people who these other Izzys attached themselves too often left him with more questions than answers. Jack's Izzy, he can understand, from a certain view, though the man himself felt like a fever dream. The less said about Stede's Izzy the better, he's never going to forgive him for the ideas he put in his Stede's head.

Then there was Sam's Izzy.

The first thing anyone noticed about him was that he was happy. He smiled and laughed without thought, and went through life with an ease Izzy didn't think he had ever felt. The crew took to him immediately, accepting him in a way they never did the other Izzys, and certainly not their own. They prodded him and asked him endless questions, and he took every touch without a flinch and answered every question without a hint of a grumble. This Izzy was free. He was open, unburdened, trusting. He was happy.

Sam's Izzy was the one that hurt the most to see. He could accept the worst that Hornigold could've offered, that he would have suffered and been broken. It was infinitely harder to see that he had a chance to be this happy. That it slipped through his fingers.

He's never looked back before, but now? Seeing what might've been? He can't stop himself from considering the possibility that maybe he made the wrong choice back then, going with Ed.

[ask-shane]

Yo,mate, I used to think a long time ago, "Shane has a difficult life, I will do everything so that I don't have this," and now I come home from work at 3 a.m., and I have to sleep for another 3 hours until 6 a.m. I'm still on the verge of becoming an alcoholic, and my depression is killing me. And I don't understand at what point in my life I took a wrong turn...

*heavy sigh* Let's go sit on the docks?

depression is a real bastard, ain’t it? it's even worse when you feel like your life is spiraling out of control. it’s fucking awful.

… sit by the dock with me for a minute here.

yulia, i care about you. i want you to know that. you wanna know the first thing i noticed about you when we first met? even with all you’ve been fighting, and even through every unspoken battle you’ve had with yourself… there’s this unshakable light in your eyes. it’s beaming. it’s beautiful. it always has been and always will be there.

sometimes life doesn’t go as planned… but we’ll make it. life’s funny like that, isn’t it? i’m rooting for you. if you need me, you know where to find me right here on the dock.

[weezerlvr228]

rivers if he was absorbed by poisonous gas but didn’t care too much

[hammyham-o-o]

I'VE BEEN WAITING TO USE THIS GIF :D

THANKS SO MUCH AUGHH YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST (ALL 100 OF YOU)

HERE'S A CAKE I BAKED JUST FOR YOU:

these adorable lil drawings of Laurens and Laff helped :3

[kazanskys-mitchell]

hey guys come get some mav angst with a side of slimav!

been feeling kinda out of place and weird the last couple of days and this was a result of that. i proofread it twice so hopefully there’s no mistakes.

i hope you like it :)

isolation

Maverick was never a people person. He liked to be alone, tinkering with some sort of machinery to pass the time. He didn’t make friends easily, people seemed to hear his callsign and look the other way. But he didn’t care.

Or maybe, he cared a little bit.

Growing up, he liked his time alone, but when other people who pretended to befriend him made plans that excluded him, he distanced himself. He didn’t want to be a nuisance, after all. That’s what he saw himself as.

A nuisance. Someone that nobody wanted to be around.

Until he met Goose.

Nick Bradshaw was a character, he was very different from Maverick in a lot of ways, but they also were all too similar. Their personalities worked so well together, and Goose declared himself Maverick’s best friend.

Goose always made sure that Maverick was included in anything they did, whether it be getting drinks with other aviators or hanging out with Carole and Bradley. Goose always made sure that Maverick felt included and welcome, and if he didn’t, they would leave to do their own thing.

The night out at the O Club with Goose was fun, even if Iceman and Slider were being jerks about the MiG and “who’s the best pilot?”

Abused children was what Goose had called them.

Maverick just had to laugh it off.

Top Gun was a little isolating for Maverick. He knew how everyone there felt about him, but he put on a brave face and kept flying like he knew how to do. He knew he was good at it, and it took his mind off everything.

Until Goose died.

The events of that day replayed in Maverick’s head so many times, he lost count. Nothing had ever felt more isolating than losing the one person who made him feel like he wasn’t a burden. Now that Goose wasn’t there to include him, he knew he’d end up alone again.

He thought he wanted that.

After the Layton rescue, he gained a friendship with Iceman and even Slider. He felt less alone when they were around.

They didn’t quite pick up on the fact that Maverick would silently excuse himself if he felt like he wasn’t wanted. It happened many times, the Top Gun class reuniting and getting drinks, and Maverick leaving early because he felt like he annoyed everyone just by being there.

Slider eventually noticed.

He would run after Maverick, asking why he was leaving, to which Maverick would respond “Oh, I’m just tired.”

Slider knew it was a lie.

So he started doing what Goose did. He made sure that Maverick felt included in everything, and it worked. Maverick liked that Slider seemed to care for him.

A year after Goose died, Maverick realized he had feelings for Slider.

He didn’t know what to do about it. He didn’t know who he could tell, and he was sure that Slider wouldn’t feel the same.

He felt more comfortable about it after Wolfman had one too many drinks and confessed to Maverick that he and Hollywood had been together for a while. Wolfman didn’t seem to remember that he had told Maverick, but Maverick remembered it for a long time.

Eventually, Maverick figured his shit out and confessed to Slider.

He was sure he’d be rejected, like he had been many times in the past, but Slider surprised him by asking Maverick on a date.

The rest was history.

Slider eventually took Maverick to his hometown to meet his family. They seemed pretty accepting of Maverick, but he still felt isolated from them. They didn’t include him in conversations, and hardly acknowledged him when he tried to join the conversation.

It took Slider a while to notice it was happening. Maverick figured that he was trying to spending time with his family, and that little ol’ Maverick was just a burden that he dragged along.

Slider found Maverick on the front porch, staring out into the road at nothing in particular.

“Mav?”

“Hey. Sorry, I figured you wanted more time alone with your family.”

“I brought you here to spend time with you.”

“I feel like I’m intruding.”

Slider had heard enough. He spent an hour on the porch with Maverick, the smaller man tangled in his arms, and told Maverick just how much he was loved.

They went inside eventually, after Slider’s mom had questioned where they went. Slider made sure from that point on that Maverick was included in their conversations, all while keeping a strong arm wrapped around his waist and pressing small kisses to the top of Maverick’s head whenever he had the opportunity.

To Slider, Maverick was everything he ever wanted and more, and Maverick no longer felt alone.

[eightmakesonebraincell]

DUDE being friends with you would honestly cure my depression you're genuinely the funniest atiny ever😭😭

DUDE HMU i'll cure your depression by giving you other problems instead 😘🫴💋

1 + 1 = ?

2 x ? = 8

the function f(x) = tan^3x is given. if f'(x) = 3tan^mx + 3tan^2x, find the value of m

[love-songs-for-emma]

im actually amazed i cant find this;

SPN FRIENDS HII

do any of u know where i could find a gif of dean saying the iconic quote of "You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people. And douchebags." from s9 e5 "dog dean afternoon"

i SWEAR i had it saved years ago but i cant find it. pls help. xoxo

[justsigma-bsd]

Sigma, a silly little question, but should i just quit?

like on one hand, i should and get it over with, and stop feeling this stress and pain, but on the other, i still want to finish what i have started :/

would i elaborate more on that? nope :p

so, please, honest answers, should i just quit?

(sorry, i would most definitely answer that myself, and then everyone will be confused if there's like no more asks or posts about it, haha...and there goes the thoughts of everyone will just forget about it since it seemed whatever i did seem to start more people to make their own things, and it's scary and stressful for me right now :/. sorry, mod, for you to hear my ramblings)

"Well, without elaborating that's a bit hard to answer... but you should do what you think you'll be happier with. If you think quitting is better for your health, well... you should do whats best for you. And you don't have to quit entirely- you can still pick whatever it is back up where you left it after a break"

[i-like-forcefem]

Honestly back into forcefem after a while because I feel stuck in boymode but I guess the forcefem never truly leaves you right :,)

And why would that be a bad thing! Forcefem is awesome and so are you cutie! :3

[charmac]

i don't think people hcing charlie as transfem are trying to dismiss the transmasc charlie hc! i think it's more of a projection thing for a lot of people, since i know at least a few of the main people who enjoy the headcanon are transfem themselves!! i don't think you have much to worry about in terms of people dismissing the tmasc or other genderqueer charlie hc anyways, since it's already much more popular! i think you're perhaps being a bit too critical.

I've literally never said anything like this at all, I think you've either misinterpreted something else I've said or have the wrong blog.

All of my Charlie gender-based posts or reblogs I've stated/tagged that I think any interpretation of Charlie's gender can make sense, be it transmasculine, transfeminine, nonbinary, agender, whatever you want.

I am one of the ~3 blogs that has access to The Bathroom Problem script and who posted and pointed out that you can make out/slightly hear the Joyce cuts in the episode itself. I would not have excitedly shared that for open-interpretation if I was "worried" people are "dismissing" transmasc Charlie headcanons. (Which, again, I've literally never said, but in any case, I believe it's valid for anyone to dismiss a headcanon they don't agree with, fandom is a sandbox.)

What I personally don't care for are genderbends and, almost by extension, analysis/meta on canon scenes that rename/re-gender the characters with no basis (or, one that comes off wrong). Both topics I've literally never publicly spoken out against here, nor have I said anything bad/negative to everyone who personally enjoys these things, so there is no way for me to possibly be "too critical" in that regard. I keep most of my opinions to myself and my close mutuals, almost exactly for what you're saying: I personally don't want to harsh or dismiss anyone's headcanons.

I have never said, and have never meant to imply, that anyone interpreting Charlie as transfem is attempting to dismiss anyone else's headcanon (which again would be a non issue to me anyway).