#and love is her final act.

[thewingedwolf]

I think the way we learn about the status of each character is kinda genius, because it informs us not only who is positive and negative but also who is mostly dealing okay and who is struggling, and it helps characterize the large cast of characters.

Collins flinches away when Angel first touches him, because he’s bleeding and it’s a significant bio hazard, but doesn’t offer up the information until Angel does. He’s at peace with being positive, but at the same time, it’s a private thing for him; probably he’s learned to stay a lil hushed about it due to his background in academia and the prejudice he almost definitely faced there. He’s also way less patient with Roger’s lil depression spiral -“Roger picked up the phone?!” and “Oh hi’? After seven months?!” - which makes you think this isn’t new for Collins, and he’s a bit too removed from his first positive test to be as understanding (or enabling) of Roger. He has no shame but he’s not stupid either.

Then there’s Angel, who offers up the information within moments of meeting Collins, almost as a way of flirting. Like Collins, Angel is at peace with her status and unashamed of who she is. Unlike Collins, she hasn’t had to hide it. To Angel, being positive is almost just part of being queer; growing up and becoming herself in the 80s and 90s means this is all Angel has ever known, is a community ravaged and left to die of AIDS by its government. She’s already living on the streets (quite likely a victim of prejudice for her status and gender/sexuality if we’re being super honest) so what the hell does she care if people know she’s positive? She’s also coping the best out of everyone because she’s accepted it; she has a loving support system in the Life Support meetings and in Mimi. She has no shame in who she is!

Maureen and Joanne’s negative status is never conveyed explicitly but what’s interesting is that both of them are introduced through their relationship with each other, and then, through their activism. The Voicemail let’s us know Joanne is a civil rights lawyer, a genius, and potentially has a strained relationship with her parents due to her sexuality or gender presentation. Before we even meet her, we know Joanne will love and fit in with this group (have always felt Collins & Joanne bonded over feeling like outsiders while bumping elbows with The Upper Class). Maureen, meanwhile, gets “that attitude towards the homeless is exactly what Maureen is protesting tonight”; it’s not surprise she’s up there singing “revolution justice screaming for solutions” alongside Collins, why she’s so drawn to Joanne - maybe she didn’t go the academic route the way Collins & Joanne do, but she’s just as smart and determined to Do Something with her life. We are shown, long before either woman shows up on stage, that they are unashamed of their friends and would fight alongside them when needed.

Roger’s status, on the other hand, is disclosed over several songs. “How can you connect in an age where strangers, landlords, lovers, your own blood cells betray” and the only positive character on stage besides the extras is Roger, but he doesn’t sing the line alone. In fact, Roger isn’t even the one to ultimately tell us - it’s Mark, mother henning & telling Roger to take his AZT who informs us that Roger being HIV positive is a new thing, likely from sharing dirty needles with April. Even more telling is that Mark informs us during the tune-up that Roger is in recovery & attempting to reconnect to his old passions, but pointedly doesn’t tell us Roger is positive until later. Unlike Collins & Angel, who have progressed further into AIDS yet dont “act sick”, Roger is very much still “acting sick” because he’s in shock. Not just that he’s positive but also that April killed herself. He’s not just struggling with being positive, he is stuck in that moment, reliving finding April and that note over and over and terrified of dying the moment he leaves the safety of the apartment. Shame, trauma, and unending grief consume him, so he tries to hide from his reality even as he reaches for community.

And then there’s Mimi!! What I always notice is not just that she’s casual while not offering up information until it’s necessary - she doesn’t tell Roger until their FOURTH song together! - but that she’s clearly struggling just like Roger. Obviously she’s struggling physically because she’s still using drugs, she’s still drinking, she’s still partying way too much, but she’s also still just sad. “Feels too damn much like home, where the Spanish babies cry. So let's find a bar so dark we forget who we are where all the scars from the nevers and maybes die” isn’t just about Mimi being restless and young and poor, it’s her own version of One Song Glory; she still “feels sick” and feels like her life has been stolen from her, and is desperate to forget everything that reminds her that she’s positive. Not just reckless, and not something as easy to pinpoint as shame, Mimi feels like she’s stuck in a never ending cycle of sickness and sadness and death, and has chosen to deal by simply refusing to acknowledge reality outside of the exact moment she’s living in.

And then there’s Mark. “Oh I’m not-I’m just here to-I don’t have-I’m here with-MARK! MARK! I’m MARK.” Most of his friends are sick and dying around him and there’s not a damn thing he can do about it and it hurts, and it makes him incapable of connecting to others emotionally while desperately seeking connections before the people he loves die. How do you find the line between grief and self pity? How do you not give into guilt while it is weighing your every moment down? Mark is unsure and he will not confide in us his feelings of despair until halfway through Act II after Angel’s funeral when the grief and guilt and pity overtake him until he can no longer hide behind his camera.

[targarrus]

hell hell hell has it's laws

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Council of lovefools.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[starry-bi-sky]

do yall ever think about bruce/batman!clone danny standing in front of his bathroom mirror after finding out he was a clone and silently tracing his face. The slope of his jaw and point of his chin. The high angle of his cheekbones and the shape of his eyes, the curve of his brow bones and the shape of his nose. The volume of his hair and the way it curls and gets fluffy when it gets too long.

His hair is black the same way a crow's wing is black. His dad's hair is black the same way a black bear's fur is black. His dad's eyes are blue like the ocean is blue. Danny's eyes are blue the same way a glacier is blue.

His dad has a square jaw and straight flat hair, and he tans and gets a face full of freckles when he's out in the sun for too long. Danny burns like a lobster and his face remains untouched. Danny has a sharp jaw and tall cheekbones, and Sam says when he's not smiling there's almost something regal about him. You would never call Jack Fenton "regal" when he's not smiling.

Sam says when he's not smiling he looks scary the same way a stone statue is. Jack Fenton when he's not smiling looks scary the same way that german shepherd staring at you across the street is.

Do you ever think he grew up wondering if he was adopted. Because of course, he has black hair and blue eyes like his dad. But having the same color doesn't make you someone's child.

Or, worse, things he's heard from the other kids and the other parents and even some of his teachers growing up; that he was the product of an affair. And that his dad was just too stupid to notice. And Danny would defend his parents until the day he died, because Jack Fenton wasn't an idiot and Maddie Fenton wasn't a cheater.

But doubt comes in with fickle tongue. his parents swear up and down that he is their child when he asks about either. That Danny just had his grandparents' features, but he was their son and they loved him.

But Danny doesn't look like either of his parents. His mom's eyes are blue like an aquamarine and Jazz's too. And they burn like lobsters in the sun too, but Jazz gets freckles on her face and so does Maddie. And as Danny grows up he doesn't bulk up or get stocky like his dad did, and when he hits puberty he doesn't shoot up like a tree like Jack Fenton did.

He stays small, and they say he's a late bloomer (and he is), or that he just has his mom's height. But he's fast and has good stamina, and some days it feels like he's built entirely different from his family. That the things they went through growing up just didn't apply to him. Jack and Maddie Fenton both had acne and breakouts when they hit puberty, and Jazz inherits it and he's seen the amount of skincare products she keeps on her side of the bathroom.

And then he hits puberty and breaks out maybe once or twice, but his skin stays clear for the most part and the problems and changes his dad went through just don't happen to him.

And the truth is worse than all of the lies.

How horrifying.

[unpersoniverse]

Skén:nen sá:sewh

as promised, here's Precious boy™ getting kissed by Precious wife™ because he deserves all the love in the world :cc

translation: Get home safe

[michelle-jacksons-art-blog]

Try these out!

[waterlilyvioletfog]

See the thing is, you read HtN and like yeah, obviously lobotomizing yourself so a dead girl’s soul doesn’t get cannibalized is completely fucking wild and you probably have to love someone at least a little to do that, but Harrow has spent the whole book having tension with Ianthe and fervently claiming to be in love with the Body— and then you get to Act V and Harrow is literally weeping wailing feral about Gideon, constructing Prince!Gideon AUs (which, she doesn’t know about Gideon’s paternity!! She is simply drawing upon a (romantic!!!) genre trope!!!) and role reversal AUs and fucking coffee shop AUs about Gideon, and she’s refusing to go back to her own body, and Abigail and Magnus and Dulcie so obviously and completely believe that Harrow is in love with Gideon because they directly compare them to Abigail and Magnus, and she says she’s saving the last dance. Agh!!! Aggghhhhh!!!!!!

[betelgeusing]

watched The Substance and I cannot lie I LOVE the part where she goes goblin mode

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: death mention / family death mention / ]

Mhmm I sure love thinking of the reality where we did get more time to really know Karai and her dynamics with the bros. Losing her hit hard in the finale, but it would’ve hit much, much harder had we known Karai longer and really saw her relationships develop with everyone.

I especially would have been interested in her dynamic with Leo, as past iterations often have the two of them clash in ideals and the like while still sharing many characteristics. Two sides of the same coin, and all that. Her specifically being the bros’ Gram-Gram also adds a whole new dynamic as well.

Imagine how interesting it would be, to have Karai start off on Leo’s side for once, showing wholly just how alike the two are at their cores and bonding as family without the worry of betrayal or animosity that other iterations suffer through, only to have Karai die anyway. Their parting hug and the desperate look of horror Leo wears later on would have hit that much harder, I feel.

[mrs-gauche]

I beat Veilguard.

It's 4am. I'm a mess. I'm in tears.

[peacockrulz]

Sorry for the lack of posts, have some more headcanons!!

[caitvibing]

Every time Jinx has gone through a major traumatic event so far, she has coped by mentally 'killing' the identity she had held prior to the traumatic event. This was obviously really emphasised with the whole 'call me Jinx, Powder is dead' theme running through Season 1. Despite Vi coming back and bringing the past up again after so many years, she ultimately copes by becoming Jinx.

But after the major trauma of losing Silco sinks in, she needs to find a new way to cope. Living as Jinx isn't safe anymore; that identity has also experienced too much pain now. So, as she starts to build her new life with Isha and Sevika, experiencing genuine fun, joy and safety again, she decides to bury Jinx along with Powder, telling Isha that "Jinx is dead" in this scene.

But 'killing' all of her 'past lives' isn't really working anymore. Isha is already reminding her of her childhood self, and then the floodgates to the past burst completely open when Vander returns and she is reunited with her whole family as Powder. She is also starting to reconnect with aspects of Jinx, as the acts of chaos she was once resented for are suddenly met with respect, even revery, becoming a symbol of the revolution. She is starting to stitch all of these selves back together again, keeping a tight enough hold on the positive sides of her identities - Powder's childlike joy and adoration for her family; Jinx's strength and ingenuity - as well as holding onto the people around her, so that she's able to function pretty well despite all the trauma these parts of herself carry.

But then, of course, everything goes totally out of the window at the end of Act 2, because it's Arcane so of course everyone needs to suffer beyond belief (yay). Presuming that Vander and Isha are gone for good, Jinx has just lost two of her biggest sources of stability allowing her to hold together this cohesive identity.

It's possible that history could repeat itself here. She is losing a father figure for the fourth time, and losing a sibling figure yet again. Perhaps the tenuous beginnings of a stronger sense of self will shatter, and she will attempt to be 'reborn' as a new identity yet again.

But when this has happened in the past, she has generally lost everybody: Powder lost her entire family, and Jinx lost Silco and Vi in one fell swoop. This time, however, she isn't completely alone. I doubt Vi is going anywhere, and Sevika will surely make a reappearance. Perhaps there is a chance Caitlyn could have the strength to "forgive, and trust in tomorrow", as was hinted in Cait's conversation with Ambessa. Perhaps Ekko will forgive her too.

I hope that this time the sisters will get the chance to hold onto each other as they grieve the family they lost, the way it should have been from the start. I hope that Jinx will have enough support left to keep rebuilding herself and "fixing" the things she has damaged in the past. I hope that in this final act, she will find enough peace to be able to step into herself, hurt but whole, grieving but loved, Powder and Jinx and herself.

[diamondsheep]

your honor .. I LOVE THEM 💚💛 !!!!

Pretty Green Swordsman and Beautiful Samurai Woman my beloveds 💚💛

[blueflipflops]

Love how the first interaction sanji has with nami go down. Its so fucking real. They are friends, your honor, FRIENDS!!! These idiots are the kind of friends who would make fun of you when someone flirts at you at the same time making fun of the guy flirting with you. They are Perfect, your honor. It is so good. No weird love triangle except for whatever the fucks going on with luffy, zoro, and sanji but! I am so here for it!!!

[chirpsythismorning]

Can we talk about how Jonathan might've been able to clock Mike simply because of what happened with him and Nancy in season two?

This will be a long post, so you might want to strap in or save it for later.

In Will and Mike's case, it would obviously be much different from Jonathan and Nancy's situation, given that you know, they're gay. But we still have Jonathan arguably going through a similar experience as Will, while Mike is going through a similar experience as Nancy.

In s2, we see Nancy confront Jonathan about how she waited for him before getting back with Steve, which is a revelation to him. Then they're at Murray's and she's struggling to say she loves Steve, after a handful of moments between them that felt like she might return Jonathan’s feelings. And you can clearly see it in his eyes, listening to Murray imply that they have feelings for each other, with him looking back and forth sort of in awe of what's happening, like he's starting to question if she might actually like him back.

Will doesn't have that same affordance as Jonathan to really hope, at least not anymore. Which is why these relationships in s2 and s4 end differently for these two brothers.

Based on all the signs he was seeing that Nancy felt the same, Jonathan decided to take the plunge to admit to Nancy how he felt, and at that same moment Nancy had the courage to show how she felt. In Will and Mike's case, Will wasn't ready to take the plunge to admit to Mike how he felt, at the same moment Mike didn't have the courage to show how he felt.

What's so painfully hilarious to me about all of this though, is that Jonathan arguably starts the season in the same shoes as most of the audience, where from his perspective, it's becoming obvious to him now that Will like's Mike, but that Mike does not feel the same way.

First at Rink-O-Mania, Mike appears a little uncomfortable upon hugging Will. Then as the happy couple continues on their adventure into Rink-O-Mania, he watches Will lagging behind moping. And then unfortunately he's out of commission for the rest of the evening...

But once he's sober and back to being an attentive brother the following morning, we see him watching them at breakfast, with Mike barely sparing Will a glance, all while Will is blatantly staring, almost like he's waiting for Mike to look back, only for Mike to get up and walk away.

All of these instances gotta be SCREAMING unrequited gay love to Jonathan. He's already gotten signs for years that Will is gay, these are now just the signs that are instilling his suspicions that Will has feelings for Mike. He could have easily interpreted their relationship in the early seasons as young best friends, with Will seeming to have a crush on Mike, and with them growing up and that potentially including Will's straight friend distancing himself from him because he doesn't feel the same. It's not the most unexpected thing in the world considering.

But then there's a shift.

Suddenly he's creeping up on them talking in his room. And we know he was listening in on the conversation because he brings up Owens when he sits down. As he's eavesdropping, he's probably thinking something innocent like Aww they're making up! And like, hey! Even if Mike doesn't feel the same, which is okay and entirely expected honestly, at least he still cares about Will enough to make things right after acting so out of character. Still, I'm not gonna lie, that sounded a lot like flirting to me--

Then he's knocking on Will's door like 30 minutes or less later only to find Mike and Will back on their bullshit. Mike suddenly isn't going out of his way to ignore or put Will on the back burner. In fact, he's on his bed and they're talking, again! The door is even closed this time, which is interesting. This has gotta be a good sign in Jon's eyes. Nothing to worry about! Right? Right...?

But then suddenly this shift continues, going in a direction he probably didn't expect.

I mean, this is literally an identical jancy parallel we have here with byler on the hood of the car, with Jonathan right there to witness it. Despite him maybe only now subconsciously picking up on the similarities between Will and Mike to him and Nancy here, he's at least taking note (I mean he's even got his gay map out and everything).

It isn't until the van scene happens, that I think Jonathan starts to genuinely consider his suspicions, which is that Mike might actually like Will back.

EVERY time we get a shot of Jonathan looking back at Will and Mike in the van, followed by a shot of his POV from the rearview mirror, we're faced with Mike looking at Will while Will is looking away.

As Jonathan is hearing Will confirm his suspicions about his feelings for Mike, he's simultaneously witnessing Mike not looking at Will with disgust, but something more akin to reverence. All of those moments in the van that we witnessed, including all the ways Mike looked at Will and everything that was said, Jonathan was right there.

And what's even more insane about this scene, is that it circles back to Jonathan as a character himself.

I remember when people were talking about how odd it was that we never saw Jonathan with a camera in s4. After 3 seasons in a row of making his passion for photography a big part of his identity, that part of him was apparently absent entirely this time around... But was it really?

This is the same guy that said, "Sometimes, people don't really say what they're really thinking. But you capture the right moment, it says more."

Jonathan might not have had his camera in s4, but this was without a doubt one of those moments where he captured something more.

Something that I also think get's highly overlooked about this scene, especially when it comes to Jonathan looking back at them, being followed by a shot of Mike staring at Will, is that he could see both of their reactions the whole time, from beginning to end. Will nor the audience had the affordance of knowing because Will was facing the other way at the end, while we on the other-hand were blurred from even having the chance, despite Mike literally being in the frame. But not Jonathan. He even lets us see what he sees, a few times, but not at the very end, which would have been nice after they didn't let us see Mike's reaction seconds before this.

Let's just stop right there for a second though and circle back to what I consider to be the first time Jonathan really picked up on Will's feelings for Mike, which was at the end of s3, in a sequence that is a little too relevant to the van scene if you ask me, given that they are almost direct parallels.

While these parallels are pretty spot on visually, they are also near spot on narratively when it comes to the evolution each of these characters are experiencing.

For Will in the first scene, it's sadness that he's moving away from his friends in Hawkins and also feeling like he's losing Mike, after what looks like him and El making up, which makes him scared he'll distance himself again. For Jonathan, it's sympathy for his brother who appears to have some very deep feelings for his friend, feelings he can't quite grasp yet but soon enough will.

For Will in the second scene, it's heartbreak that he has to accept that Mike will never feel the same, knowing that supporting his relationship with El (encouraging it honestly) will likely turn out just as it did last time, with him losing Mike all over again, for the last time. For Jonathan it's sympathy for his brother who has now confirmed his suspicions that the feelings he has for Mike are more than just that of a friend.

Given that this parallel reinforces the same feelings Will and Jonathan had in s3 to now, why would this not also reinforce those same feelings that Mike had in s3 to now?

In the first scene, Mike was visibly distraught, with dialogue from Hopper in the background applying a little too perfectly with what he was feeling in that moment, which was scared. He’s apparently back together with El now, despite them doing just fine as friends for the last 3 months, as well as him and Will just having finally gone back to them being on good terms again. But now, it’s like he’s right back where he started at the beginning of s3, feeling obligated to be the perfect boyfriend to El, and as a result, having no choice in his eyes but to distance himself from Will. Mike then walks into his house looking like a zombie, almost emotionless stepping into his mother's embrace.

Now, I say almost emotionless because it looks like Mike was trying to hold back showing how he truly felt in this moment. He's not crying like he did in s1 when he lost Will that first time. Time has passed and things have changed (he doesn't want things to change). And he's trying his best to keep it together. But the in-focus close-ups make it clear that he is definitely not okay.

What's so impactful about these parallels is that it presents the inner struggle both of these characters are having, both queer and experiencing doubts, but in different ways and for different reasons.

Will is the one who covers it all up with lies, hiding the tears in his eyes, because boys don't cry.

Mike is the one who has never cried to them, just to his soul (RUN AWAY! TURN AWAY! RUN AWAY! TURN AWAY! RUN AWAY!!!).

If you actually try to get a gage on Mike's in-focus emotions in that first scene vs. his out-of-focus emotions in that second scene, well they're not that far off from each other.

We go from Mike smiling vibrantly at Will, to him now slowly turning away to look back down at the painting, with whatever the hell emotion this is...

It's near impossible to catch because of how out-of-focus it is, but looking a lot closer, it honestly appears like Mike is feeling something akin to sadness that he's trying to mask. For a moment it even looks like he turns his head to wince emotionally, only to correct himself.

And call me crazy, but these shots also low-key parallel each other. Mike looking down trying to keep his emotions in check and failing miserably, only to look up and meet eyes with someone whose witnessing it.

With each shot before this of Jonathan observing Mike looking at Will, with him showing all the emotions Will never got to see and everything else in between, I wonder what Jon saw this time? Probably another thing he didn't expect.

Can you just try to imagine the silence in this van, accompanied by Will's muffled sobs, and then try to imagine Mike turning to look down at the painting, only to sneak a glance, and then go right back to looking at the painting, IN SILENCE, and then try to tell me how the assumption that Mike didn’t notice Will crying makes any sense, like realistically?

Yeah me and Jonathan are confused too.

Right now, Jonathan's probably wondering why Mike was acting a little fruity and repressed during the painting reveal. And that although he may have a penchant for being able to 'capture the right moment', Mike is sticking with his story (despite all the stalling and doubt). He is 100% straight!

And so maybe this is where Jonathan tries to accept what is being presented to him as the truth, despite the contradictions in front of him. It's likely that despite the way Mike looks at Will and acts around him, in ways he would have assumed coming from Nancy in s2 would've been evidence that she felt the same, it probably doesn't apply to Mike.

Maybe Jonathan's ready to accept that it's a lot more likely Will is experiencing unrequited love as a gay kid growing up in a small town, the most predictable experience a gay kid could go through, and in contrast Mike just feels too bad to let Will down easy.

Or who knows, maybe Mike could still be a little bit gay too...

But it doesn't matter anyways. Mike seems to be adamant about this and so there's really nothing else Jonathan can he do besides tell his brother he'll be there for him no matter what. And so he does just that.

But then Mike just has to surprise him one last time.

For those that don't know, the line Mike gives here in his monologue was in part pulled from Will's monologue in the van. Most don't know this because this line didn't make the final cut for the van scene, but in the official script the writers posted, what we find is an almost a direct parallel.

Which makes the reaction shots of Will and Jonathan directly after Mike says this all the more epic.

From Will's end he was probably hearing Mike say this and just thinking 'Damn. Well, that's what you get for using your feelings to inspire Mike to profess his love to El.'

But from Jonathan's end, I don't think his outside POV of these events overlapping was nearly as naive as his brothers understanding of the events. Because why the fuck would Mike need to use Will's feelings to inspire him to profess his love to El in the first place? Is this what Mike has been struggling with? Really? Why before every moment Mike takes action in this scene, is Will's hand literally pushing him into it? Why is Mike being so dramatic about saying I love you, stuttering and rambling about her being a superhero, not saying nearly as meaningful of things as what Will said in the van?

And then it hits him.

Mike is reminding him a little too much of another Wheeler right now...

Nancy Wheeler, who was afraid of what would happen if she accepted herself for who she really was, leading her to retreat back to the safety of Steve. Because Nancy liked Steve, but she didn't love Steve.

And now here is Mike Wheeler, who has went from being incredibly distant with Will after reuniting with El, something that is very unlike the Mike he knew in previous seasons, to something more himself again after they make up, with him looking at Will with adoration after hearing his words in the van, only to turn away and look heartbroken. Mike who is now struggling to simply tell El he loves her with Will right behind him literally yelling at him to do it.

And now it's like all those little moments are starting to add up to Jonathan.

Suddenly all those signs he picked up on from Will when he was younger are now blending in with moments Will shared with Mike. It was Mike who jumped in after him and his mom's speech to Will in the shed in s2, with tears in his eyes recalling the day that they met (without being asked, let alone pushed to). And it's Mike who is now looking like he's at war with himself as he attempts to give encouragement to El, just like he did with Will in s2, but this time he needs someone to push him to do it, and that person just so happens to be Will. After just finding out about Will's feelings and also while assuming El wants him to love her that way still, Mike is stuck.

I don't think it's takes a genius to consider Jonathan is capable of realizing how fucked they all are in this situation.

As much as Mike isn't ready for a sleuth of reasons, Will isn't ready either.

This provides a huge contrast between the bylers ², because while Jonathan and Nancy went through a similar experience to Will and Mike, them being ready to accept it and act on it didn't involve nearly as many factors and risks. Will and Mike also have the added barrier that is homophobia.

Will's internalized homophobia lies in part with assuming Mike could never feel the same based on some of the words he said in their last two fights, with parts being painfully reminiscent of the things his dad and bullies used to say about him. These are also words that contradict Mike's own words and actions from the previous seasons, things that did once give Will hope. The shame and guilt that comes with falling for your best friend, who you now know will never feel the same after being foolish enough to believe it not too long ago, and who might not even want to be your friend anymore upon finding out the truth, is understandable. He can't have hope like Jonathan can. It's just not the same.

Mike's internalized homophobia lies with assuming El wants him to love her, along with their relationship being expected and socially acceptable from everyone around him. Though unfortunately for her he feels abundantly more in love in the moments he shares with Will. Despite trying to make it work with El as hard as he could, because she's amazing and all any guy could hope for in a girlfriend, he can't ignore the fact that the feelings he has for these two people are different. The shame and guilt that comes with you, a boy, falling for your best friend, who is also a boy, and who is starting to show that he feels the same, all while you can't muster up the courage to break up with your girlfriend, nor can you muster up the courage to tell her that you love her, not when she's begging you, dying or even just simply at the end of a letter, is pretty understandable too. He can't have hope like Nancy can. It's just not the same.

Spoiler: They were not ready.

PS: I'm still not over the fact that they low-key confirmed these events elsewhere in the story...

[smolsawyer]

Mafin (Marta & Fina - Sueños de Libertad) - 8/?

-The problem is that your heart is already taken, right? -My husband, remember? -Are you sure? ... Fina. -You're crazy. -It's more than obvious, seeing how you look at her, how you treat her. She attracts you like a magnet, or am I wrong? -I don't want to continue with this conversation. -If I know something it's how the world works. I've seen it before many times Marta. You're so hard on that girl because you think you can cover up your true feelings for her. -I don't... -Don't worry, I'm not going to say anything to anyone. If I have learned anything over the years, it's that preferences are personal and no one should judge them.