#and like obv we’re never going to agree on this but at least i can agree on SOMETHING

[bearofohu]

sorry for doing this again but how are ppl seriously claiming that rin and haru werent written with the subtext of having any romantic tension……… what the fuck do you think the association with sakura trees means in japan???? the power of friendship??? commodore between men?? it means gay sex fall in love. like come the fuck on

[imaginespazzi]

I agree with the consensus? that Paige and Azzi only started officially dating either this year or last year sometime. But, i definitely still feel like realisations were already had before college? Idk i can see them having that realisation esp in 2020 when Paige stayed with the Fudds but them maybe deciding not to pursue anything and just prioritise their friendship. Especially since at that point, Paige was obvs heading off to college and there was no guarantee yet that Azzi was gonna commit to UConn. Like there was probably an unspoken agreement that if Azzi ends up at UConn then they can talk about it again then and so Azzi’s freshman year was maybe them testing the waters and then at some point, they were just like well we’re clearly in love with each other and these feelings aren’t gonna go away and i absolutely hate seeing you with anyone else so we might as well give this a real shot.

Also a roman empire of mine is what if Azzi had committed to UCLA instead?? But i just know that they would have still ended up together eventually, like i fully believe they’re really meant to be each other’s person forever 🥺

Sorry for the long ramble, i just feel like I could talk about them forever 😅

Ah I love a good ramble so never apologize for that. 😌

I think they've been a little in love since the moment they met tbh. So yeah, I think you could be onto something with them realizing during Covid. That's a long time to live together (@ the closed proximity trope) and not at least sort of figure a couple of things out.

Omg lowkey a UConn-UCLA matchup with Paige vs Azzi would have slapped. Would have just been such a good game. And then like Paige still being a little upset that Azzi chose UCLA and channelling her agression into the game + both of them having missed each other because they live across the country now. Like the sexual tension would have been through the roof. They're just very inevitable to me.

[eliteseven]

I actually think that DJ!Shad would not go for Nocturne at all if she is still "in love" with someone else (obv. her heart belongs to Shar or so she thinks, I mean she goes to pretty great lengths to make sure a Tav can still be her "plaything", even deluding herself into thinking that Shar would "appreciate" the subterfuge).

I feel like if at all there are still feelings for someone else (Tav) involved, even if she isn't with them, she would make it very clear to Nocturne that whatever is between them would never be more than a friends with benefits situation. I even think that in the end in that kind of scenario she would not go for Nocturne at all out of respect for her old friend/lover (Nocturne) as to not hurt her feelings.

Because even if Sharran, I do Not think Shad is full on dommy mommy. Her soft side will never fully disappear, as it even shows if she chooses to go all DJ.

If Shad is not romanced at all, I can absolutely see her rekindling what she probably had with Nocturne in any scenario (Sharran or Selunite should they meet again).

This is fair, too! I agree that even a mother superior Shadowheart wouldn’t rekindle anything with Nocturne specifically unless she didn’t have anyone else in the picture.

In this AU she probably thinks she’s done with Tav (or at least she tries to convince herself of the fact). Tbh I see her seeking out sex from her acolytes, nameless and faceless to her, rather than her closer companions like Nocturne. And that’s all it would be to her- sex without feelings. I feel like Nocturne would be something closer to her moral compass in this scenario. Nocturne might be the one to point out that she seems…deeply unhappy, despite her status. Nocturne is just about the only person in that cloister who actually cares about Shadowheart beyond her title.

I would like to see her bringing Nocturne out with her when she flees. Serena might misinterpret what’s between them- but she would offer both of them sanctuary, regardless. She’s a good person- she would put aside her feelings for Shadowheart and go so far as to protect Nocturne, because she knows it’s right.

Plus, I think we’re ignoring Nocturne’s agency in this just a bit. She probably wouldn’t want a relationship with Shadowheart, knowing she’s already hung up over someone else. Though it’s fair to say they’d seek comfort from each other, and companionship.

[judeesill]

tbf i still find non radfem books like who cooked the last supper, invisible women, the feminine mystique, the second sex etc good recs for girls/women interested in radical feminism. sort of like an intro class to feminism in general before you focus on actual radfem literature. you can't go from 0 feminist readings to gyn/ecology overnight... it's not a given that gyns who find themselves on radblr will have read basic feminist texts

yeah that’s a really good point! I think a lot of the problems on radblr come from the fact that most women come to it without any knowledge about feminism, much less any organizing experience. that’s fine, and to some extent should be expected given the current states of the broader left (weak, disorganized, overrun with liberalism/ anarchism) and the feminist movement (functionally non-existent). That’s just the way it is across the left — I can’t tell you how many so-called socialists I know who couldn’t even tell you what class struggle means. In our case, though, I think it’s especially problematic, because a lot of women are “radicalized” by disillusionment with trans politics (or discomfort with trans people 🙃) — and without a proper grounding in feminist basics, it’s really, really easy to at best lose focus on women’s liberation, and at worst just become a reactionary. lol.

So, I totally agree that some feminism 101 is in order, so we’re all at least speaking the same language when it comes to the messier ideological debates about and within radical feminism.

I think a big part of the problem, though, is that … it’s not a given that women who find themselves on radblr will EVER read basic feminist texts, or even radical feminist ones. it’s pretty obvious from the way people talk about lesbian separatism and political lesbianism that, like, no one knows what they’re fucking talking about. and how could they, if they’re just reblogging quote posts and the same handful of master lists with a whole bunch of random pdfs with no context or commentary? hate to break it to ya, ladies, but all your faves were political lesbians. like, literally all of them. And this is actually pretty clear from the things they write!

I’ll save my takes on radblr’s fundamentally incoherent lesbian politics and the fact that separatism has NEVER been a settled question in radical feminism and the fact that political movements need GOALS and STRATEGIES and DUES BASED MEMBERSHIP ORGANIZATIONS for later. Suffice it to say, we need to stop being so content to let tumblr thought leaders pulling evocative quotes from PDFs decide what we think, and start getting serious about political education.

I don’t think every woman on radblr needs to do a PhD to be able to weigh in on things, but I do think those of us with the time/desire to make intellectual interventions, create syllabi, and/or start cohering some democratic organizational infrastructure (or at least some more discussion groups) can and should step up. Obv people are and have been doing this, but if we want to ever do anything more than snipe at each other online, we gotta get movin.

Thanks for letting me grandstand on ur ask, i just have a decade’s worth of frustration built up about this 🙃 always more to say. (like, I also don’t think we should be so into gyn/ecology at all, actually … but more on that later (-:< )

TL;DR: READ MORE! GET WISE, WOMEN! LET A THOUSAND READING GROUPS BLOOM!

[lauranyx]

My Stray Kids Fanmeet Experience

So i saw skz for the first time in real life the other day (jan 202023 to be exact :p) and i wanna write my whole experience so that i can look back at this in the future cuz my memory is shit 😅

It all started last year 2022 around Nov/Dec when bench announced that they'll have a bench x stray kids fanmeet this Jan 2023 (excite excite) so obv i just HAD to get tickets. ITS STRAY KIDS HELLO?

minor detour for some of that extra context lol:

I got into skz mid to late 2021 and ofc it was felix with his deep ass “cooking like a chef” yt short that sucked me in. From then on i just got hooked into their content and just them in general. Really nice to see a grp thats around my age doing something amazing like what theyre doing now.

Anyway! Back to my fan meet xp

So last yr i saw the announcement and got all majorly excited. At first i was thinking of getting VIP tickets. I was actually willing to spend 8k for a fanmeet and a chance to receive a poster from them. But then i saw the lines in bench and i was like,, hell naw! I aint gonna be putting myself through that. Y’all can wait in line for that imma spend my time elsewhere. So i waited for the promo period to get tickets for lower box instead. This was only 4k with a chance for a bye wave opportunity (no physical up close interaction like shaking hands or anything but at least u get to see them closer up). I was totally fine w this since i spend less and since im not going for what majority (who can afford) want, less ppl to deal with/wait in line for.

Now.. i went through s t r u g g l e just to claim my ticket after buying my stuff from bench. Dont really wanna retype everything since ive already shared w my friends so imma just attach screenshots of my rant

(Screenshots here)

Now, after that whole ordeal, is the new year and i honestly forgot there was a raffle. Also can i just say, thank goodness ate girl (for those that dont know ate is filipino for sister that we use even for non relatives.. kinda like noona/unnie) was kind enough to send me my code that night so i was still able to enter my code for the raffle to win a bye wave opportunity. Cuz if not… i wouldnt have seen skz up close😿

Jan 12 day of the bye wave winners announcement: I checked my email around morning and noon; nothing. So i was like ayt, i didnt win. I’ll still get to see skz tho irl w decent seats.

BUT THEN

when i checked my email again in the evening- actually i didnt purposefully check my mail; i just saw the push notif on my phone. Something like “STRAY KIDS WINNER, congratulations!” and I FREAKED THE FUCK OUT. Like OH MY GOD. OH. MY. GOD!! I WON?!?!??? Suuuper ecstatic. Kept squeeling and shit. I could not even.😶😱🤗😵🥴🫠🤪🤪🤪

After i was able to calm down, I immediately let ate girl know if we could meet up earlier so i can get my receipt back so i can have no trouble on the day of the fanmeet when i claim the raffle. She was nice enough to agree and meet up earlier and it was nice that she seemed happy for my win (she also bought lb tix) kinda regretful i didnt try to be friends w her but im shy so whatever. I just want receipt so i can see the bois😛😁😁😁

Cut to day of fan meet. Wait no- actually.. the week of the fanmeet. The monday of that wk is when i met up w ate gurl to get my receipt. Friday was the fanmeet. In between i was tryna decide my outfit (that i dont have a pic of but whatever. i’ll describe it nalang) which ended up being a kinda loose white tank top with a green plaid long sleeve on top then dark grey/black slim jeans. Add in a couple of accessories ( choker, chains, earrings) and we’re good to go. Oh i also had on my hidden high heel highcut black sneakers (or at least i think theyre sneakers; can never remember fashion shtuff)

In case it wasn’t obvious i was fully planning to go on my own since my friends/cousins said they couldnt (busy or broke) so whatever. BUT THEN my friend, day before the fanmeet- night before actually- was like “ hey! Joke lang im actually going to the meet” so i was like “omg yay!” Not like that exactly but yeah. Same sentiments :p

I asked my friend if we could meet up on fri and she said sure. She’ll just be w her friend who got her the ticket.

Now! We can finally cut to the day of the fanmeet. Claiming for raffle winners are from 10am-2pm then theres an orientation @3pm so i went to moa around 12-1230, got my photo cards (chan, leeknow, & hyunjin) and the wristband showing me as a bye wave winner. Went around moa, had lunch in jollibee, waited around in my car for my friend to arrive around 4, 5pm. Ate again in ikea resto then we finally went to the venue.

While lining up we made friends w another stay who gave out some freebies (ngl i forgot her name🥲) she was sweet. I was kinda stupid and decided to split up from my friend (cuz there 2 lines and the one i went to was shorter but my friend didnt follow so 🙃☹️) so i ended lining up alone when i told her that i wanted to meet up so i wouldnt line up alone lol. Anyway, i got inside moa arena went to my seat in lb 221 and got ready for the fanmeet.

The fanmeet started around 7pm (tho gates opened at 5) it wasnt fully packed inside but there were still a LOT of Stay that attended. Tho i think gen ad was fully packed.

Honestly everything happened so fast that if i didnt take videos and didnt see the vids that others have posted online, i woulda forgotten everything but i know i enjoyed every minute of it😁

So first off skz opened w God’s Menu then the host, Sam Oh (who i know of because she used to be on radio and i loved listening to her shows then), introduced them and on the programme went.

The kids played some jenga w missions, whisper challenge, dance replay challange, domino challange, paint a shirt that was raffled out to the audience) call w a fan(that didnt work out cuz of cell service issues) also i didnt quite get that WE had to call the numbers of the phones in front of the skz members so i didnt really try until it was too late. One fan was able to connect tho but it didnt really work out too well. Im glossing over these and might have mentioned them in the wrong order but thats because there are tons of vids out there about these so i won’t go into detail.

At the end of the fan meet skz performed Case 143 and we moved on to the giving out of signed posters THEN my long anticipated bye wave opportunity. So while the poster receivers were getting ready so were the bye wavers. There was an usher of sorts holding a sign for us to recognize and follow to the exit. The staff told us that no pics/vid was allowed😕 sucks but i was planning to sneak a vid if possible. Others also tried im sure of it. I was 15/200 in line. Unfortunately because i was so close to the front and they were ushering us to the stage pretty fast, i couldnt set up my phone to video on time. No matter tho. There was a barrier that was too high for the phone in my front jean pocket to even capture anything so it wouldve failed anyway.

Going up the stage felt so rushed even tho the videos showed that we werent even walking that fast. But it felt so fast that i couldnt even tell you what order the kids were in when i was waving bye to them. Thank god for other Stays tho so imma put their line up here so i can recall my experience better

They were grouped by twos behind some barriers that looked like kiosk stands from left to right (tho we entered right and left the stage left) it went

Chan - Lee Know | Changbin - Hyunjin | Han - Felix | Seungmun - I.N.

We were like 5ft away from them kandhaksbskabxj

Ok so first i saw was IN and i gotta be honest i cant remember the experience 😭😭 id like to say we made brief eye contact but im not sure. I think i saw that he was looking at the ones behind me so i moved my eyes to Seungmin. Again i cant remember anymore so idek what actually happened here

Now Seungmin, bb, i swear we made eye contact and i think i shocked him with my hair cause his eyes widened and mouth opened wider while looking at me aidbsidbdlaj. Context: i have a shaved head. Tho im in the middle of growing it out. My last shave was mid Dec last yr so my hair at this point is about an inch to an inch and a half

Lemme just insert here that i COULD NOT stop smiling

Next was Felix and oh. my. GOODNESS GRACIOUS!!!!! We made the looongest eye contact ever!!! wodbsisbdb SWEAR!! At least 2 seconds! It was glorious~ And his face was just so beautiful and his smile was angelic and he may not be my bias but he lives rent free mehn. Rent. Free. Period.

Ayt so Han. My bb, my bias. I feel so bad cause i think i got so caught up w looking at felix ( making fucken 2 second eye contact) that i think Han saw me not looking at him so he went on to say bye to the ones behind me already😖😣😔😢😭 tho i did try to catch his eyes but no such luck cause i had to keep moving

Moving on, it was Hyunjin. Very brief, my encounter with him. Again i think i spent too long looking at Felix that it just pushed back the rest to skip over me causing me to miss meeting eyes with the rest. But Hyunjin 👌 also he be the tallest of the grp

Same thing with Changbin tho i really did try my best to look at them whenever they were more or less directly in front of me. The size of this man tho! Batak! So buff 💪 i just wanna feel… all of it👀 in a non sexual way ofc😶 unless? 😏 jk (or am i🤔)

Anyway!

Lee Know is so pretty like wtf . But again he was already looking at those behind me😞 and i had to keep the line moving so.. sad=me Lee Know is my bias wrecker pa naman🫤 i really love his relationship w Han whether its just friends or whatever it is I just love seeing the interactions. (Ngl tho,, the fan edits of minsung that i see Stay post? Mmm is something alright)

Bang fucken Chan DOE! Maybe cuz he’s last idk. But he made it a point to look at me in the eyes😍🥰 made me soo happy~ and his smile! And dimples! My gosh he’s just adorable☺️😊🫠🫠🤭 i just wanna be your friend man. Actually i just wanna be friends with all 8 of them bdkajxhak

Moving on.

After all this we were ushered out of the arena and I decided to loiter a bit outside before i went back to my car. Fangirled like crazy. Then promptly went back to the hotel. I fangirled again when i saw my cousins at the hotel roofdeck cuz i couldnt just keep this in mehn i had to let it out and share my joy.

Later in the night i found out that skz stayed a bit longer to jam w the crowd while Doodle was playing. Kinda jealous but i got to see them up close so im content for now.

The upcoming concert in March tho.. i NEED to get sound check and vip tix. I just gotta💪 heres to me, hopin’ i get the tickets i want🤞🤞

[87435678753256732]

January 2023

new year new me!! at least that’s what i’m telling myself. i’m writhing on here mostly for my own mental sanity, and because now i don’t have anyone else to talk about it really

i got broken up with. i’m trying to process all my thoughts, gather my emotions, and basically express how i feel. i’m definitely having two reactions, but obv the sad one is overwhelming the other part of me (the sagittarius part i call it) that is a bit relieved. okay. so about two weeks ago i started noticing that he/things were a bit off. i said “okay probably just my mood due to not being on meds anymore.” i didn’t say anything because i wanted to avoid facing reality; things were stale. our last two dates were fine, at least i thought. today two things happened that felt off. one was that he started eating his food before i got mine, and the other was that he didn’t want to go watch puss in boots with me. fine, okay whatever, take me home bc because i have work tomorrow. i wasn’t upset, i understood that we both have work in the morning. we takes me home, parks, and says “i have something to tell you” AWW HELL NAW. thought in my head; this could be 1. scary, telling me he wants to take things the next step or 2. end things. WELPPP it was 2. he stated that he needed a break, reason being he needs to work on himself. i say okay,, and start asking him questions bc i cannot be left contemplating what could’ve ACTUALLY be the reason. states that he has “outgrown” our relationship. BRO we’re both 23 and goofy asf, wym outgrown gtfo. okay, next. states i don’t fit the “ideal partner” he has for himself. says my style, personality, and hair doesn’t correlate with what he’d want in someone. LMFAO. i’ve known my style is funny, i call it emo grandma core- which i’ve made very aware to him in the past that that’s just who i am. okay, whatever. basically grass is greener reasoning. what else is out there? welp, how he can go find out. it sucks being broken up with for the third time. i give shitty men so many excuses and end up being the one hurt. we both agreed that we were glad that this happened now instead of way into the relationship. i know some of the reasons were because of external factors of myself (ex: fashion), but i genuinely believe that this is just a reflection of him. when will you find someone that checks all the boxes? hardly ever. compromise is big, especially when you claim to “love someone.” i basically embarrassed him. this has made me realize that 1. i need to seek someone who loves me regardless of how i look and 2. understands that the “perfect” match isn’t realistic, love is something you work for. i understand that this was his first relationship, and i’m happy to have been his first, and thankful for the fun dates and cool experiences. now it’s time to heal and move on. I did want to talk about the side of me that i like to refer as my sag side, the side that fears commitment and wants to run away. this side is relieved that this is over. mostly because i didn’t really feel that i loved him as much as i tried convincing myself. i enjoyed the sex, that was fun, but i didn’t really feel the love i felt for my previous partners. at moments i questioned whether i even liked men, yet ive never had feelings for women either, so comphet can’t be the answer. now that i’m not in a relationship, my sag side wants to hoe out but i need to be safe about my hoeventures.

i know i need to heal first. these next couple of days will suck. i told him i wouldn’t block him, bc i’m not a petty person and still care about him. we hugged, kissed, he went in for longer which i backed out of. i feel used. used for sex. the way he groped me throughout our date, for him to later tell me he no longer had feelings. i think his excuse was stupid, but i understand that he still needs to grow. i have therapy on thursday, so hopefully i’ll be able to process some of this. i’ve grieved a lot this past year, and it hurts so much to add on to the table. but i’ll be okay, i always have been.

[lilsuzn]

MLQC Victor - NSFW abc headcanons (REMASTERED)

Fandom: Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice

Warnings: Explit sexual content (GN READER)

it's what I posted a while ago, but better - I changed some things, I deleted some thing and wrote new. I think it's much better now

A = Aftercare (What they are after sex?)

Victor is a man that has his values straight

You are the most important part of his life (even if he sometimes struggles to shop it) and he will do anything for you… and only for you

Other people don’t matter. He only takes what he wants and leaves.

But you - his sweetest, dearest, little love… can ask anything and everything (well, almost - see N).

You crave massages? He will buy the most luxurious oils on the market, might even take a course to perfect his skills to give you more pleasure

Want to take a bath? He will have a bathtub installed if he doesn’t have one already

Pillowtalk, kissing, snuggling, another round? No need to say it twice. He leaves to please you

When it comes to him, he likes to pull you close and tell you all the things he has no courage to say at any other time

Leave no space for misunderstanding in the department of his unconditional, boundless, eternal love and devotion for you

Tell you just how happy he is to have you and how everything is worthless in comparison to you

After he makes sure you’ve been pleasured throughly already, he will want to share a shower

And make no mistake - he will wash you. You can wash him too, if you want, but taking care of that pretty body of yours is his responsibility

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite body part is his waist

It wasn’t easy to get that V shaped body and he is extremely proud of this accomplishment…

Especially when he sees your hungry gaze roaming his torso up and down

And you… He couldn’t possibly choose one part

Beautiful legs, rounded butt, soft abdomen and that gorgeous, gorgeous smile

Yeah…

No…

That would be your thighs when it comes to the sexual aspect

You have such a delicate skin there. So suckable. Kissable. More plush than any pillow could ever be

He feels so secure and at ease when they squeeze around his head as you ride his face.

The sound of his hips slapping against them - heavenly

Not much can make him calmer than your lovely, plump thighs

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum)

It should come (hihihi) as no surprise that he loves to spill inside

It’s so intimate… Bonding…

Doesn’t really like to cum onto you for reasons he himself doesn’t really understand

It just feels… somewhat degrading? And he doesn’t like it that way?

Then again cuming into your mouth is a strong YES. Maybe it’s because of how enthusiastically you take him in

How you collect all the spill from your chin and lick it off your fingers like it was some kind of delicious delicacy

That sight makes him hard all over again…

D = Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory - a dirty secret of theirs)

He has a folder of your photos on his computer

Some of them were taken with consent… Some without you realising…

Because you were in his bed sleeping in your naked glory… And he could only stop himself the first, like 20 (?) times

He sorts them by aesthetic and cuteness/sexiness

Jacks off to them when you’re not around

Most of them are very artistic. He tries his best to make them as good as the ones he was using before you… (see J)

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He slept with a few girls in college, but he saw it only as ‘taking care of his sexual needs’ - no real feelings included

He had one dedicated booty call - a girl who fell in love with him despite him saying that he only only sees her for sex

That period really allowed him to explore his sexuality

So he knows what he likes and what to do, so his partner likes it too

F = Favorite position (This goes without saying)

Everything when he takes you from the back

He’s rather keen on yanking hair, slaping ass…

But when it comes to the person he loves - you, he likes to face each other during sex

He wants to kiss your face, neck and chest. Nuzzle his face into your abdomen while he’s going down from his height

Your legs thrown over his shoulders so he can slap his hips against your soft thighs

Or legs pressed to your sides, hands gripping your thighs

And he can’t even attempt to lie he doesn’t absolutely love when you sit on his lap… or get on top in general

Or when your thighs grip his head when you 69 on the couch while ‘watching’ a movie. Your lips sloppy around him as his tongue pleasures you with most precision and dedication

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)

No goofy.

If they start to joke around, they get spanked. HARD.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Victor is a passionate swimmer, so most of his body is hairless

But he doesn’t shave his pubes. Finds it weird to be completely bare down there and the first time he had sex with a completly hairless girl, he was a bit taken aback with her baby like smoothness.

Only trims them with a ‘pubes razor’ which is his old razor that he doesn’t use for face anymore, because he got a better one from his aunt for Christmas

Carpet matches the drapes

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)

No goofy.

Only love and eternal devotion.

He will caress and leave kisses all over your body. Keep you close in the warmest and most loving embrace

No dummies or idiots in bed. Only treasures and loves

Almost like he’s trying to make it up to you for his tendency to be so aloof on a daily basis

The sweet talk doesn’t stop there, but I already said everything about it in A

J = Jack off (Masturbation headcanon)

This man didn’t have time to waste on women when he was building his empire, so he naturally spend quite a lot of his life masturbating instead of having sex

He doesn’t really enjoy porn, though. It’s too cartoonish for him. He much prefers to look through lingerie commercials or nude photoshoots - the more artistic the better

After he reunites with you, he starts to feel all that pent up sex tension and starts to jack off almost every day

Thinking about you. Looking at photos of you. Carving you with every small bit of his being

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

First of all - seeing his partner being pleasured. Either by him or by a vibrating toy plugged into them or pressed against their sensitive spots. He doesn’t even pump himself watching. He’s way too consumed with the enticing sights

Double penetration. His huge dick in one whole, dildo in another… Just thinking about it gets him going

He can’t deny himself at least some manhandling (if you consent - obv). Although he doesn’t go full on dom every time (at least with you) he seems to be unable to deny himself some hair pulling and choking... Although he almost does it lovingly? Spanking and whipping will surely also happen from time to time. Can get very rough when jealous

Also a slight daddy kink. When he hears it slip past your lips in the form of a joke - he feels some strange tingling in his groin and it’s not a venereal disease

If you sit on his lap, make a cute, helpless expression and ask daddy to play with you… It just turns him into a primal animal with no self restraint

That he kinda always seems to be

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Where nobody can hear them

Or see them

Anywhere with a stable surface really, but he needs to know you will have full privacy

Would never agree for public sex

All the sweet sounds and expressions he makes you do are his and only his to experience

M = Motivation (What turns them on/gets them going)

Stress, irritation, anger, hurt… Sex is a great way for him to gat this weight of his chest since he doesn’t really like to think those negative feeligs through

Or any feelings, if we’re at it

A nice butt is also a motivation, especially when it’s attached to a fine pair of legs

But both of these factors aren’t a guarantee of a turn on and even if they have that impact on him, he still will most likely not act on it

What he really struggles to control is a real attraction that reaches what’s beyond physical

A beautiful, hardworking and open-minded person is something Victor finds hard to ignore

N = No (Something they wouldn’t do/turn offs)

No sharing

No blood play

No permanent marking

Nothing too forcefull or aggressive

No sex before assigning boundaries and exchanging preferences

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

As I already said In B, Victor is an oral lover

More into giving than receiving, but would never push his lover away

(you can always 69, right?)

The man is humming in pleasure as his tongue slides along your sex

Is more than willing to go for hours if only you let him

The more you moan the more intense his movements become

His main goal is to please

The secondary one is to be the best at yet another thing

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He has two base modes

One: I love you, my sweet creature - all about measured, unhurried but hard thrust. True, pure love-making

Two: Little girls don’t get a say in how daddy fucks them - you’re tearing up, sobbing, drooling and he gets even more turned on by it. Fucks harder and faster then you both believed possible. Years of engaging in sports come to show themselves

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He will participate when the occasion occurs

Might even initiate an occasion

But it’s not really sex for him. It’s a quickie

And when compared to the real love-making with you… it’s just meh

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

When it comes to taking risks, I believe I already made it clear that he isn’t too into that

If someone walked in you, it would be very upsetting for him

If you got accidentally hurt would break his heart

But experiment he would happily

New toys, new positions, new kinks… He will try anything once

Well, almost anything (see N)

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

We all have our better and worst days, and this man has a whole company to run. It’s only natural for him to be tired

So usually he won’t last for more than one round. Maybe 3 on weekends

But will last a while if he sets a slower pace (see P)

On vacations however, after a few days of rest his stamina will increase dramatically

Have you seen this guy’s torso? Exactly

He has some stamina to spare

T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Not against, although he prefers to experiment with positions that to experiment with toys

Will probably never propose any, except when he knows his partner is into such things

If you do - Victor will do his research and find something exciting for you to enjoy

U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)

He really is not patient enough for that

Doesn’t have time for it either

Why would he even want to? They’re unsatisfied = he’s unsatisfied (as I mentioned in K)

He sees no appeal in it. When he wants to fuck, he wants to fuck. No reason to beat around the bush

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Victor can be a bit more talkative than usual during the foreplay

Throughs some praise (a lot of it)

Tell you about his feelings (but not too much at that point)

About things that made him jealous…

A quiet Fuck may leave his lips when he enters you and when he’s about to come

In the middle of those two - he’s rather silent

Not much of a moaner

He grunts and growls a lot though. Can get a little bit loud from time

W = Wild card (A random headcanon for the character)

It was a sunny, autumn day. You were walking down the street. You’re fingers entwined. The sunlight was gracing your beautiful features so gorgeously… and he had already been yearning for so long

When you’ve finally reached the Souvenir’s door, the man is all worked up

Not that you could tell from his steely expression

But you sure got suspicious when he got all touchy feely out of the sudden

Not that you would ever mind - obviously

Feather light kisses on the nape of your neck and shoulders. Fingertips caressed your waist to then slide down to your hips. Then he reached for the hem of your dress…

“I love you…” he whispered in your ear

Goosebumps momentarily appeared on your skin as all the intense feelings he had been making you experience from the very day you saw him for the first time in his office travel down your spine in a form of a intense shiver

You wanted him. So bad. For so long.

And there was no hiding his feelings for you at that moment as you turned your head to face him

Soon after stomach was pressed against the kitchen counter. Your naked butt was all out on display for Victor to squeeze and spank as you squirmed and moaned under his touch

Victor didn’t take any unnecessary time to move his long, broad fingers down, to stroke your sensitive slit

He praised you for being so wet, so flushed, so eager for him

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

“I love you, too” you whispered to his ear as his arms pressed you as close to his body as possible, while you were still going back from your highs

And after that, from his lips slipped the words of the most sincere adoration… and true love

Words you would never expect to leave his beautiful, soft mouth

Matches the rest of the man

Long and thick

No curvature. Perfectly straight

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Rather average

Ha has periods when he doesn’t even think about it

And he has ones when he can’t stop thinking about it

However he doesn’t go too much either way

Z = Zzz… (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Remember what I said in S? Applies here as well

He’s a hardworking man

Simplu needs to work hard to keep his business growing and to keep his lover pleased

Then he just needs to get some rest. Don’t try to change his mind because he will

If he’s well rested however, he won’t let you sleep

Like, not a chance. You need to come at least five times. He doesn’t make the rules, sorry

[spacedikut]

hi different anon here! but what if spencer had to take a mandatory arts class of some kind for his degree (i don’t know how caltech or phd courses work but we’re going to ignore that) and he’s getting super frustrated because he’s so good at all of his other academic classes but he just! can’t! figure! out! the arts!!! but then reader is in the same class as him and notices that he’s struggling so they offer to help him out?

it’s kind of a role reversal of the usual spencer-tutors-reader in college (because he’s a genius so it’s an obvious [and very good!] dynamic)

and bonus points if it’s a pottery class and they have a “ghost” moment 🙈🙈 (reader is obv patrick swayze 🤤) but make it any medium you want! or even a music class!! up to you my dear <3

ok for some reason i immedaitely thought of finger painting but. have decided against that

idk how art classes work either but if it’s anything like art was in school then you’re kind of left to you own devices? so let’s go with that. it’s fiction babey!

this was meant to be headcanons/random concepts but turned in a messy blurb so it’s under read more

he loves art and isn’t so bummed out that he has to take the class because - again - he likes it But the issue is he likes Looking at it, Not creating it. he’s got jiggly hands that squirm and twitch without his consent constantly and that doesn’t bode well for drawing fine details and intricate patterns, so he’s hoping because it’s an introductory course it’ll be. maybe more theory than anything else? or at least just basic tools and mediums so he can struggle through with a grimace from the professor

he ends up with /oil/ paints though and he’s looking from the bowl of fruit to his easel to thr OIL PAINTS and derek is there, in spirit, going hahahaha good luck pretty boy! and spencer Could ask to change the type of paint he’s using but he’s awkward and so. grits his teeth and goes. alrighty this is it this is life im using oil paints, something notoriously difficult for a beginner, which is what i am, a beginner, and i am now putting these expensive paints to this expensive easel with my inexperienced hands-

and you’ve been watching him since he stepped in, because he’s pretty, and now you’re grimacing cause Oh Boy he does not know what he’s doing and he’s. he’s breaking the paintbrushes. you can hear the bristles cracking from across the room.

spencer would’ve noticed you if he wasn’t so Humiliated (he, too, easily notices pretty people) so when you creep up behind him and say, “oil paints are difficult, aren’t they?” in this understanding voice that he follows with his head, his first thought is- oh, so to top it all off a piece of art has come to life? this is where we are now?

he does that thing where he forces out a little breath along with a small smile and goes, “ah, yeah. i didn’t want to ask for something else, so,” and weakly lifts the palette in his hand as if to say, it is what it is.

“i could help, if you’d like?”

and he agrees cause he’s eager to learn! and you, a masterful artistic genius, blow him away with not only your knowledge (you’re into the theory kind of stuff too and at one point he jolts himself, realises he was staring at you with his mouth open, and deeeeep down wishes someone would think of him the way he thinks of you when you ramble) but your actual skills too! and you’re a great teacher! patient, understanding, and did he say patient? because he has painted a damn sky at least 15 times and every time he Somehow makes clouds look phallic and you just go hehe :) and he’s like I love u (internally)

several weeks in, when you and spencer have become arty friends, the subject turns to drawing people rather than objects - you tell him getting people /right/ is something you struggle with yet you love doodling your friends and family in your sketchbook. the first body spencer draws (that isn’t a stick man) is done in crayons, which he’s found is the medium that works best for him (only when the crayon is properly wrapped. because the waxy feel of them Freaks him out)

you help him learn about drawing anatomy while he tells you /about/ anatomy, he attempts to sketch a hand and it’s so odd looking he laughs so hard he CRIES and you finally convince him to try charcoal, your personal favourite

it’s messy and gets everywhere (spencer opens his mouth to complain about his expensive grey cardigan but then- the little mark is a physical representation of this memory between you and him, huddled close together as you both draw aimlessly in your sketchbook, and the mark feels more like a blessing) but spencer ends up agreeing that charcoal sketches look the best.

then he sees something he shouldn’t have.

you’re talking about how you sketch your family all the time - there’s several of your roommates and your pets and a sheep u saw this one time - then there’s...someone oddly familiar? that he catches a glimpse of? and before he can think he goes “wait-“ opens that page and it’s him. him, standing too close to an easel with his tongue slightly poking out in concentration and it’s a charcoal sketch of him from last week.

you’re embarrassed. “that’s weird, im sorry-“

“you make me look good” he tells you, smiling sweetly, and you’re convinced it’s just to comfort you but you’re too glad he isn’t filing a restraining order you let it slide

i mean. have you seen his face? how can anyone look at that and not want to start chiselling marble?

then he gets secretive, weird, a little odd and definitely is avoiding you. he paints and draws with his back to you, still talks to you but over his shoulder and can never really look you in the eyes. you think this is it and that the sweetheart you’ve come to see as more than a friend is Done with you, because you’re a CREEP, and then after a weekend of silence on his end this happens:

while you’re getting your stuff ready, he walks up silently and slides a small sketchbook in front of you. you stare at it, wondering what it’s for, and he nods at it and tells you to open it. when you go to, he stops you-

“a-actually, let me give you a page to start on-“

when he manhandles the book his hands brush yours, his already bright red cheeks get redder, and you bite your tongue so you don’t sigh dreamily.

he’s drawn you.

it’s not perfect and kind of not pretty - a lot of harsh edges and weird shading - but you can tell its you. it’s you, drawn by him, probably from memory, and he’s drawn little hearts around your head because he’s the cutest? evidently?

“it’s really bad, but i thought-“ you look directly at him, making him freeze. he’s got a little charcoal just under his eye. unabashedly, you reach up and wipe it away, hand remaining at the side of his face when you’re done. “i thought you deserve to feel how i felt when you drew me.”

“and how did you feel?”

he gulps. “loved.”

all you can do in the Classroom you’re in is beam sickeningly sweet at one another, lost in your own world while there’s a wordless exchange. the rest of the sketchbook is full of half attempts at sketching you - in different positions, with different expressions, some with a full head while others are half a face. some of them are hilarious, but they’re all made with the purest intentions. “i love it.”

and when you share a look then, you don’t need to verbally say what comes next just yet.

(and. yes. the second you see a pottery class is available you drag him and Make him sit between your legs and he’s never blushed so much in his life the teacher asks if he needs air. at one point you think it’d be funny to peck his neck and the shiver it sends through him is so shocking your mould on the wheel is squished between his hands)

[princess-of-the-corner]

Okay so I kiiiiinda mentioned this but I was slightly rewriting the 'Ben 10,000' episode to combine it with the 'Ken 10' and also make it a bit darker like we discussed. So buckle the fuckle up kids!

First off, since we have duplicates, we're going to make a system to differentiate them.

'Ben' = 10 year old Ben

'10,000' = Ben 10,000

Gwen = Ten year old Gwen

'Gwendolyn' = 30 year old Gwen.

Anyway! Onto the plot:

So Ben and Gwen are bickering about something or other until they get yoinked into the future. Which naturally freaks them out.

Gwendolyn explains who she is and when they are, along with some of why they're here. Which is when 10,000 shows up because obvs he's going to have something set up for when big Magic spells go off and investigate.

10,000 tells Gwendolyn to send them back, but she claims she needs to recharge. He calls bullshit on that and she snaps back at him saying that they'll stay for 24 hours, which 10,000 eventually agrees to.

While Ben and Gwen were originally amazed by their future selves and their abilities, they quickly catch on to what's.... Wrong. 10,000, on top of always being in an Alien form and always working, is very... Direct and kinda mean. He doesn't answer Gwendolyn's snark, just shuts her down and tries to give commands.

Gwendolyn explains more on how much of a spiral 10,000 is in. Mentioning some of his more extreme methods of handling villains. Like, ya know. Murder.

That really freaks Ben and Gwen out. Because even if it's someone awful, handling things by curbstomping them immediately is... Bad. And how he's spending 100% of his time as a Hero. Plus some comments on how he treated other Heroes, even fighting them and demoting them civilians if their powers were from Artifacts or sorts to keep said Artifacts somewhere he considers 'safer'.  

There's some hint to 'why' 10,000 has gotten that bad. Mainly that everyone he was close to was pushed away and he hasn’t really had any support system. Gwendolyn is only let in because he literally can’t kick her out of the house. He tries, but she can just teleport in. We get a hint to what’s up with Kevin, though not by name because that’s spoilers for Ben and Gwen. But Gwendolyn mentions a friend who 10,000 has entirely stopped speaking to because he tried to talk him down from what’s happening(What a reverse, ain’t it?), but yeah he’s fine and still a good guy in this Future.

On that note, since I mentioned that I'm combining episodes, we also get Kenny who is 10. And yes, Ben and Gwen do kind of get whiplash from going 'wait, shit. Future child????'. Toss in a joke about why Gwendolyn doesn't have any kids haha.... Don't worry Gwen you'll figure that out soon enough.

Kenny and 10,000's relationship is.... Not Good. The best way I can describe it is something like Adrien and Gabriel from ML. 10,000 is overprotective to the point of near isolating, and Kenny has to sneak out to have friends(Devlin is mentioned(and also adopted because ya know)), which also gets him in trouble. But 10,000 is also very emotionally distant and always working. Which Kenny is very upset about, but yelling at your dad doesn't always work. Ben and Gwen get along with Kenny great, and he does kinda comment on how he wishes that 10,000 was more like Ben because not only do they get along but Ben is kinda slammed into "oh my future kid gotta attempt dad mode" and is more genuinely dad-like than 10,000 has been in a long ass time(though yeah not the best because he is also 10 but he’s trying to at least seem responsible and mature). 

From an outside perspective, it does make sense why 10,000 is this way. He barely had any support system for everything he's been through. He's also lost his wife and nearly lost his kid. Those are hinted at because 'spoilers' so Gwendolyn doesn't say it and 10,000 himself does not want to discuss it but it's pretty blatant since Gwendolyn mentions a specific incident of 10,000 snapping, and we never hear him mention a wife or Kenny mention a mom. 10,000 is reacting to trauma and is unable to listen to anyone else because he's trying to protect them damn it! If he relaxes, if he doesn't go all in on killing the villains that threaten them instead of arresting them, more people would die.

In the end, it comes down to an argument between Ben and 10,000 because the only person he would listen to is himself(which was Gwendolyn's whole reason for yoinking them to the future.). So Gwen kinda distracts Gwendolyn for a minute while the other two kinda yell at each other.

Both make quite a few points. Ben pointing out how fucked 10,000's whole mentality is. 10,000 does make a good point on how many people were saved by how he's working, and how many people he's lost because he hesitated to put certain villains down in the past.

Ben manages to get through to him with two points. The first, is asking if there were any people from before he went for taking out threats that actually took the second chance. And yes, some did. (Kevin for one. I'm giving Charmcaster a redemption too). He might not be on speaking terms with them right now due to how he's pushed them away, but he still cares about them a lot.

Which brings out the second point: those relationships. He's pushed everyone away. Gwendolyn is the only person he occasionally talks to, and that's only because he can't kick her out of the house. Not to mention how little time he genuinely spends with Kenny.

10,000 just... Really gets hit with how bad things have gotten. It's been a slippery slope for years and years, always pushing just a little further and further over time until it got to where he is now. And just. Hearing his literal younger self's perspective really puts it into, well, perspective.

10,000 kinda has a breakdown here. Which is also the first time he steps back and turns Human again.

This is when Gwen and Gwendolyn come back. And yeah Gwendolyn just sees 10,000 actually Human and still crying a bit and she knows her idea worked. He totally calls her out on it and she's like "well the only one as stubborn as you, is you!" Which makes him laugh and snark back like he used to. But she doesn’t push too hard and they have an actual moment of connecting. 

There is a mention of how things are still going to take time. 10,000 is still very much Not Okay. But he can at least work toward it now.

We also get a scene of 10,000 actually talking to Kenny. (They're supposed to be alone but the other three are spying) And Kenny is just really thrown off because what the hap is fuckening today. But they do have a moment. Just actual father-son talking, and 10,000 apologizing for being an awful parent, and promising he's going to do better.

Kenny half-jokingly asks about being allowed to see his friends without sneaking out, and 10,000 is all "hold that thought", switching to XLR8 to zip off for a moment but comes back(remembering to turn Human again) with a box of some kind.

This is where the replica Omnitrix comes in! 10,000 had started working on it years ago, when he first found out he was going to be a parent, so that Kenny could have one once he was old enough to use it properly. It got shoved in a box and forgotten because of. Ya know. All that. And with 10,000 trying to keep Kenny away from anything dangerous, he never even thought to let him have it. 

But now, not only could Kenny use it to protect himself when he is out(something 10,000 is very worried about because on top of trauma, his identity as a Hero is known so Kenny would be a target). And also, it could definitely be a way for them to bond through the experience. Of course Kenny's version is suitably nerfed but still. It is a promise to work on things. 

Of course Ben and Gwen have to go back to the past, but they end with another mention of "it'll take a while to be okay, but we're working on it."

The epilogue would be Ben and Gwen talking on some of the whole... Implications of what their future has, but Gwen says that Gwendolyn told her that Time doesn't work that way. Ben and Gwen are their 'past', but 10,000 and Gwendolyn don't have to be their 'future'. They can change things.

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from the Lost Tomb, part 5.2

Also yes this is a 5 part story arc, why do you ask, no I’m not “avoiding real life work”

Main Chat

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW THERE ARE THOSE WHO WOULD COMPLAIN ABOUT BEING DRAGGED OUT OF BED AT AN UNGODLY HOUR FOR THE SAKE OF SOME JEWELRY AND FORCED INTO AN ADVENTURE

Wu Xie: And we are just so grateful you are above all that.

Zhang Qiling: You were fully awake and insisted we pack and go as soon as possible in case there was, and I quote, “more weird shit happening we can cash in on.”

Wu Xie: I mean it’s kind of interesting that the Zhang family sent a car for us. We could have driven. So what is going on there, I wonder?

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW FOR A PARANOID AND CONNIVING LITTLE SHIT YOU STILL RADIATE OBLIVIOUS BAMBI ENERGY

HATE TO BE THE ADMIRAL ACKBAR HERE BUT ITS DEF A TRAP MY BOY

WHY DO U THINK WE ARE MESSAGING AND NOT TALKING DUMMY

WERE YOU IN A TOMB ON THE DAY THEY TAUGHT PPL STRANGER DANGER

BUT NO NO YOU WERE ALL “LETS GET IN THE VAN WITH THE FREE CANDY AND PUPPIES I BET WE’RE GOING TO THE CIRCUS”

THIS IS THE LAST STRAW IM LOJACKING YOU FOR REAL THIS TIME, SHOULDVE DONE THIS YEARS AGO

Zhang Qiling: I agree, in this particular case, with Pangzi. You should not have gotten in their vehicle while we were still inside the house. It forced us to follow you into the van to prevent separation, and they seemed to be expecting that. I don’t know whether Zhang Rishan intended this, but I don’t trust him.

Wu Xie: :( I got excited and didn’t think it through. I’m sorry.

Wang Pangzi: DONT YOU GIVE US THE BIG EYES WE ARE IMMUNE

MOSTLY

SPEAKING OF IMMUNE ITS REALLY FUCKIN COLD IN HERE AND UR STILL SICK, PUT YOUR JACKET ON STUPID

Wu Xie: oh relax, I’m fine. No fever at all today, remember? I feel a lot better, too.

Wang Pangzi: YOU LEAVE ME NO CHOICE BUT TO HAVE XIAO GE INTERVENE

Zhang Qiling: It is odd to say this, but Pangzi is right again. You are barely back on your feet and could easily get worse again. Wu Xie. Jacket. Now.

Wu Xie: Oh fine. Teaming up on me, I see. Happy now?

Wang Pangzi: FUCKING ECSTATIC. NOW BACK TO HOW WE MAY BE PULLING A LI CU

Wu Xie: If it is an abduction, it wouldn’t be them moving against the whole Wu family—not with Uncle Erbai in charge. Zhang Rishan strikes me as someone who doesn’t make a move unless he is sure of his plan, and this is all a bit last-minute to be a big shift. Besides, they let Xiao Ge keep his sword and we still have all our phones.

Wang Pangzi: TOOK AWAY MY EXPLOSIVES THO THE BASTARDS

Zhang Qiling: In fairness, you were waving them around and yelling that if they tried anything it was going to be “yippeekiyay motherfucker all up in this bitch.”

Wang Pangzi: IT SOUNDS LESS COOL COMING FROM YOU. I THINK I SEE THE TEAHOUSE?

Wu Xie: me too. That’s Zhang Rishan on the steps. This must be urgent. Everybody stay shiny.

Zhang Qiling: I will be getting out first. Wu Xie in the middle, Pangzi at the rear.

Wang Pangzi: AND WHAT A VIEW;)

An hour later…

Main Chat

Wu Xie: Is everyone okay? I tried knocking but nothing is getting through, these are some solid walls.

Wu Xie: guys???

Wang Pangzi: OOPS PHONE WAS ON SILENT AND I WAS BUSY YELLING AT THE CEILING

IM PRESENT AND PISSED OFF

Zhang Qiling: Apologies, I was trying to break down the door.

Wang Pangzi: SO THIS MAY NOT BE THE TIME TO SAY I TOLD YOU SO BUT WHILE WE’RE HERE

Wu Xie: fuck Pangzi, I know, okay??

I’m an idiot, I’m so fucking stupid. It’s not like it’s the first or fiftieth time I’ve put you two in danger, either.

Wang Pangzi: HEY HEY WHOA NOW

STOP SAYING RUDE SHIT ABOUT MY FRIEND

ITS GONNA BE OKAY

DESPITE KNOWING THIS WAS A BAD IDEA I STILL COULDNT PREDICT HOW MUCH CHAOTIC LUCK THIS FAMILY HAS

DAMN IT I HATE WHEN HEI XIAZI IS RIGHT ABOUT THINGS

Zhang Qiling: I’m sorry. This is my fault. My line has a ruthlessly pragmatic streak and they’ve clearly wanted to test us separately to see why the necklace reacted to our arrival like that. It does not excuse Zhang Rishan trapping us in these separate rooms.

Wang Pangzi: UHH BITCH I SAID THIS FAMILY NOT YOUR FAMILY

THIS AINT ABOUT THEM

YOUR FAMILY IS ON MY SHIT LIST EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY

THIS FAMILY MEANT US OBVS

UGH ANY SIGN OF THE BASTARDS?

Zhang Qiling: no. Wu Xie?

Zhang Qiling: Wu Xie, answer me.

Wang Pangzi: WU XIE

TIANZHEN

PICK UP YOUR FUCKING PHONE DAMNIT YOU'RE SCARING XIAOGE

Zhang Qiling: I’m going to try breaking down the door again.

Wu Xie: Hello, Wang Pangzi and Zhang Qiling. My apologies for the rather inhospitable circumstances, but this seemed expedient considering the unknown qualities of the necklace. I could not be sure who was causing what, or what could happen next, and thus have temporarily set you in separate rooms for the sake of everyone’s safety.

Wang Pangzi: WTF GIVE HIM BACK HIS FUCKIN PHONE ZHANG RISHAN I KNOW ITS YOU YOU PRETENTIOUS ANTIQUE

WE DESTROYED THIS PLACE BEFORE AND WE CAN DO IT AGAIN

Zhang Qiling: Your concerns for everyone’s safety are noted. Thank you for whatever you believe you’ve done right here.

Now. If you release us immediately and return Wu Xie to us, we will consider leaving without direct personal retribution.

Wang Pangzi: WHAT HE SAID AND ALSO YOU SUCK

Wu Xie: I regret that this has happened, I hope to make it up to you in the future. For the purpose of today’s needs, however—I will have my men escort the two of you out if you so desire, but unfortunately Wu Xie will need to stay until we have finished examining him.

Wang Pangzi: EXAMINING??? YOU FUCKING PERV HANDS OFF HE MAY BE THE BELLE OF THE BALL BUT HIS DANCE CARD IS SPOKEN FOR

I SWEAR I DID NOT GO THROUGH TEN YEARS OF THIS STARCROSSED CLUSTERFUCK FOR YOU TO SWOOP IN AND STEAL MY FRIENDS BF

Wu Xie: There is no call for rudeness. He will not be harmed. The artifact was responding to him directly. It has not lit up like this in over 200 years, and I need to understand why it is responding, and responding to someone who is not our kin, which it has never done before. This could have implications for everyone in my family if it could protect someone at the right moment.

Wang Pangzi: OKAY BUT CONSIDERING OUR TRACK RECORD IN THIS BUILDING AND THE SITUATION AT HAND Y’ALL ARE ABOUT TO NEED PROTECTION

Wu Xie: The testing would be going better if Wu Xie wasn’t worrying himself unnecessarily over where you both are, it’s making our readings difficult.

Wang Pangzi: OH GEE SO SORRY YOUR KIDNAPPING VICTIMS ARENT THRILLED TO BE HERE TO SAMPLE YOUR CREEPY JEWELRY BOX BUT THAT SOUNDS LIKE A YOU PROBLEM

Zhang Qiling: Zhang Rishan. I appreciate that you must think of our family first in your decisions. As must I. I hope you can appreciate what that means for decisions I make.

Wang Pangzi: HEHEHE SO TRUE BESTIE

YOU PISSED OFF THE WRONG GOTH TODAY BUDDY BOY

Zhang Qiling: A compromise: we stay with him as you run your tests. That will calm him and assuage Pangzi’s concerns and prevent me from…testing the limits of your lifespan.

Wu Xie: I accept that this may temporarily impact our relations, but am hopeful that you will come to understand that sometimes I need to make certain choices for this family that are…difficult. I will come to let you—One moment. Something seems to be happening.

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: OH SO WE ARE GONNA JUST POLITELY SIT WITH WU XIE AS STRANGERS POKE HIM WITH NEEDLES ARE WE HUH WELL LOOK WHOS BEING A HELPFUL LITTLE LAB ASSISTANT

Zhang Qiling: I’m attempting to convince him to let us out. Of course we will not simply sit there. Some lying to gain trust is necessary here.

Wang Pangzi: UR BEIN A SHADY BITCH XIAOGE AND ITS HOT

THATS WHY YOUR TATTOO IS SO BIG ITS FULL OF SECRETS

ALWAYS KNEW YOU HAD IT IN YOU TO—WAIT WHAT WAS THAT SOUND??

At the same time…

Bonnie and Clyde Chat

Xie Yuchen: …so, this is not what I expected to find.

Hei Yangjing: yeah kiddo is a bit freaked out:/ this sucks. I mean I get that they are concerned blah blah blah necklace goes brightbright but maybe we should go find the other two

or at least find a way to let Wu Xie know we are here, that room he’s in looks like a dungeon and not in a good way

Xie Yuchen: Does it look like I’m able to do anything right now? Also, I’m fairly certain they won’t be harmed. Zhang Rishan may be callous, but he isn’t stupid.

Hei Yangjing: r u kidding

he split up Romeo and Juliet, then left Romeo with a sword—seems pretty stupid to me

Xie Yuchen: Yeah I’m not going near that. He made his bed with that choice. What can you see? These Neanderthal guards are blocking my view.

Hei Yangjing: uh so there’s like a lab table situation

Wu Xie isn’t tied up, a good sign in this context

I can’t see what those people are holding, they’re talking a lot and some asshole just grabbed Wu Xie’s arm, looks like maybe they are putting in an IV?

The necklace is—oh. Oh shit.

[eberles]

On The Course

Rafe Cameron

if this gif is yours, lmk and i’ll tag you!

A/N: this is the longest thing i’ve ever written coming in at 3.8K!! it’s set the summer AFTER the show so like a year later basically and rafe isn’t a murderer obv, it’s also loosely based on A Cinderella Story - the one with Hilary Duff, okay enjoy :)

Warnings: mentions of parent death, brief mention of toxic living environments, swearing, lots of dialogue (idk if that needs a warning but)

You never had many friends growing up, or any really. Except JJ, he was always there for you, your very best friend and even though he offered all the time for you to hangout with the other pogues, you always declined. Of course, you went to school with them and had classes together and sure they were nice, but you never actually felt welcome. JJ was the first friend you made when you moved to the Outer Banks after your parents died. It’s been 4 years since then and living with your ugly aunt and her horrible twin daughters was the last thing you ever wanted for yourself. The only upside of moving to Outer Banks all those years ago was meeting JJ.

Everyone assumed you were dating and both of you had considered the fact, but quickly decided that it wasn’t meant to be for the two of you. JJ liked to be a playboy and he wasn’t really your type anyways. for years you watched him get with girl after girl while you sat idly by watching and looking out for him, never having a guy of your own to trot around with. You never minded it though, being by yourself gave you a sense of comfort and with your current living situations, your cousins made it difficult for you to have many friends or otherwise anyways. JJ always made you feel better about it though and assured you that you didn’t need a man to be happy because of how independent you were and how ‘one day you’re gonna get out of here and meet the guy of dreams, the one that lives up to your standards.” You would always shake your head and roll your eyes at him when he said that, but he believed it. At least the getting out of here part. JJ knew from the moment he met you 4 years ago that you weren’t destined to be on a little island like Outer Banks and you had bigger things coming to you. For now, this was home and you were making the best of it.

“JJ, please talk to your boss. I need a job, I have to get out of my house this summer.” you begged JJ one sunny afternoon, knowing that school was ending in a few days.

“Y/N, you’re gonna hate it. Trust me, you don’t wanna serve a bunch of rich pricks.” JJ sighed, looking over at you briefly and noticing you had your best puppy dog look plastered onto your face, the one you always knew got him to cave. “Fucking fine, i’ll talk to him.”

A few days passed and you were finally done with school. This was your last summer before heading off to college and as much as you didn’t want to spend it working, you knew your aunt had no intention of giving you any money for college. So here you were, serving your first day as a cart girl at the most prestigious country club on Figure 8. The course was fairly slow today and you had a small training session for the first few hours of your shift, but it wasn’t all that hard. Drive around, serve drinks, get tipped. As you were riding around on your little golf cart you noticed none other than Rafe Cameron flagging you down.

“Hi, what can I get for you?” you refrained from immediately rolling your eyes at him and forcing a smile onto your face as you climbed out of your cart.

“I’ll just get a beer, thanks.” he pointed to his beer of choice and watched as you poured the beverage slowly into the plastic cup. “I haven’t seen you around here before.”

“That’s because I just started.” you stated pointedly, handing Rafe the drink and giving him a small smile. “Can i get you anything else?”

“Do you know how to golf?” Rafe was speaking before he could stop himself and you were taken aback by his question, let alone his politeness towards you. You’d never actually come in contact with the boy in front of you, but you’d heard horror stories from JJ surrounding the summer before. You shook your head no, not moving back to your cart just yet curious to where this was heading. “Do you wanna give it a shot? I can teach you.”

You knew you shouldn’t, JJ would scold you up and down for it, after previously warning you Rafe was an often golfer and that you’d probably see him quite a bit, but this wasn’t the Rafe you were expecting. Not after JJ’s multiple stories of Rafe beating him and the other pogues up and constantly giving them a hard time. However, you couldn’t stop yourself from agreeing to Rafe’s offer. Moving closer to him and grabbing the club from him you did exactly what you’d seen in the movies: knees spread, club down, aimed at the small golf ball and raising your arms back only for them to swing the club right into the dirt.

“Damn, you weren’t lying.” Rafe chuckled, taking a spot behind you making sure it was okay that he helped you first. Rafe was a good 6 inches taller than you, but when he came up you could still feel his breath hitting your ear causing your heart to beat out of your chest and goosebumps to erupt all over. He wrapped his arms around yours, placing his hands over yours adjusting your grip on the club. “Ready? One...two...three.”

“Oh- oh my god! I did it! Well you did it, but I did it!” you turned around in Rafe’s grasp jumping up excitedly after watching the ball move this time. Before Rafe could react, realization hit you that you were at work and not making a very good first impression. “I have to go, I'm sorry.”

You ran back towards your golf cart, jumping in and driving off checking in on the other golfers. Rafe had a big smile on his face watching the cute new girl drive off. He felt a sense of home building in his chest after your small interaction and he wasn’t sure what was going on. No girl had ever affected him the way you did and he didn’t even know your name. Yet.

“Dude, what’s got you blushing?” Topper asked, joining him on the course and snapping Rafe out of his thoughts about you.

“Have you seen the new cart girl?”

“Yea she’s cute but she’s a pogue.” Topper stated and Rafe looked at him skeptically not wanting to believe the words. Rafe was almost positive he’d never seen you around before and definitely not with the other pogues. Granted, the way everything happened last summer he never saw the pogues anymore, choosing the high road and turning himself into a better man so he could eventually leave Figure 8 on his own.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“Y/N!” you turned around hearing JJ calling your name. You just entered the cut after having to walk home from your first shift at the country club. “I’ve been texting you for hours.”

“Oh sorry JJ, my shitty phone died.” you shrugged letting JJ catch up with you before continuing your walk home.

“How was your first day?” you knew JJ would ask, but you hadn’t quite figured out what you were planning on telling him. Do you bring up your weird but pleasant interaction with Rafe?

“It was good! It was a pretty slow day, perfect for learning.” JJ hummed in response, looking at you quizzically not fully believing you didn’t have anything more to say. You decided to keep it short, not looking forward to JJ mocking your newfound connection with his enemy. You felt bad enough about it without having him breathing down your neck. JJ walked you home, the two of you making small talk for the rest of the short distance to your house.

“Charge your phone, how else will I annoy you?” you rolled eyes, laughing at what JJ said, pushing on his chest.

“Goodbye JJ, Y/N has things to do.” your aunt spoke, catching you off guard as you were saying bye to JJ outside your house. JJ gave you a sympathetic look before walking off, never wanting to leave you alone with them. “Y/N, I’m going out of town tomorrow. I’ll be leaving you this list to work on while I'm gone. I expect everything to be finished. You will go to work, come home and work some more. Zero play time and in the house everyday by 6 pm, missy.”

“Okay but there’s this one event the country club is having and it’s a night shift for me.” you followed your aunt around the small house, hoping she would let you out of the house for Midsummers knowing the tips would be great.

“Well that’s not going to work, now is it?” she huffed, shoving the 7 page list into your hands and storming off, her heels clicking with every step. “One page for everyday, don’t miss anything.”

The next day your aunt left just like she planned to, her twin daughters staying behind to ‘keep an eye on you’ but really, they were just going to annoy you the whole time. The only thing you could really look forward to anymore was going to work and hoping the customers were nicer than your cousins.

“Y/N, we’re coming with you today!” the twins spoke at the same time with fake chipper voices.

“Great.” you deadpanned, turning away from them and making your way towards their shared car and climbing in the back seat. The drive was short and they talked the whole way there so you practically jumped out before the car stopped moving noticing your arrival. You were feeling giddy to be at work today secretly hoping you would see a certain kook boy again. You didn’t know much about him, only the awful things JJ had spoken about him briefly but didn’t see that side of him only enticing you to know more.

After a few hours driving around the course serving drinks to mostly middle aged white men you finally noticed Rafe with a few of his friends. You wanted to talk to him again, but having his friends around made you unsure about the situation so you decided to play it cool.

“Did you guys want drinks?” you stopped on the path behind them before getting off the cart and making your way to them.

“Rafe, is this your cute cart girl from yesterday?” Topper laughed, hitting Rafe’s back pushing him towards you and you noticed a blushing Rafe shoot a quick glare in his direction.

“Hey, how’s your second day going?” Rafe moved closer to you and the cart hoping to get out of ear shot from Topper and Kelce.

“It’s been good, lots of older men come around here I’ve noticed.” you laughed handing Rafe the same drink as yesterday since you remembered the specific beer he wanted. “It makes for good tips though so I can't complain.”

“Yea these guys might be old but they’re rich as fuck.” Rafe sipped his beer, smiling at you and apologizing for his friends being stupid behind him. “Hey so I never got your name-”

“Hey Y/N!” you turned, hearing your name being called and saw JJ running towards you. You mentally cursed because of course this was the one time he would ever step foot on the course to look for you. Rafe looked at you confused even though Topper previously told him you were technically a pogue yourself. “Y/N, your cousins are inside and they’re driving me crazy. I needed a break. What’s going on here?”

“Oh JJ, I’m sorry about them, they insisted on being here for my whole shift.” you ignored JJ’s last question, putting all the attention on your cousins, hoping it would deflect from you and Rafe chatting.

“You okay?” JJ asked in a hushed tone, glaring at Rafe and you laughed nodding your head yes. “Okay I guess I’ll go back inside then. Be careful.”

“So your name’s Y/N?” Rafe stood back a few feet while you had your short conversation with JJ and returned to your side once JJ started walking away. “I’m assuming since you know Maybank that you already know who I am.”

“Well I know of you, but if we keep meeting like this maybe i’ll be able to find out more.” you were feeling brave all of a sudden, hoping putting yourself out there would get your somewhere with Rafe. Everything felt natural with him, and you didn’t want to let that feeling escape you by ruining it.

“Why don’t you give me your number and then it won’t have to be exclusive to only here?” Rafe smirked, pulling his phone out and placing it in your hands. You laughed, typing your phone number in quickly and returning it back to him.

“I should really get back to work, Rafe but I’ll see you around yea?” you climbed back into your golf cart as Rafe smiled and waved bye to you.

The next few days passed and you hadn’t seen Rafe at the club, but you had been texting quite a bit. Just in a few days of talking you felt like you were already learning so much about him and his life. He told you everything from who his friends are to how overbearing and controlling his father was. He explained that he went to college at Chapel Hill for a year before dropping out and his father never forgave him. You shared your deepest feelings with him about your parents deaths and how your aunt and cousins were Satan's children. You told him you couldn’t wait to get out of Outer Banks and go off to college at the end of the summer. He understood you and you meshed together so well just after a few days.

i haven’t told my dad, but after getting my shit together this past year i started applying to schools. my first choice is princeton.

princeton?! rafe, no way! that’s where i’m hoping to go.

You couldn’t deny the fast connection you felt with rafe, everything in your body was telling you that you belonged together. Rafe told you he was looking forward to seeing you at the Midsummers event tonight, but you had to break the devastating news that there was no way you could go.

curfew is 6 pm cameron, get with it😂

jesus, i’m sorry i didn’t know you were 7

You laughed at the text on your phone when a tapping noise on your window startled you. You dragged yourself out of bed to see JJ standing on the ground below you.

“JJ, what are you doing?!” you whispered after opening the window and sticking your head out.

“I'm coming up!” JJ whispered back, scaling the side of your house next to your bedroom window. Lucky for him there was a small rock wall giving him the perfect entrance. “I'm breaking you out, you’re coming to Midsummers.”

“JJ, I can't! They’ll kill me if I leave!” JJ gave you a look as if to say ‘stop being a baby.’ It only took a few more seconds of convincing from JJ for you to agree. He successfully helped you out your window and down the rock wall without your cousins noticing you had left for the night. JJ borrowed John B's van and left it parked a few houses down so the twins wouldn’t be suspicious.

“Thanks for this, JJ. You’re the best.” you smiled wide, feeling free for the first time in a while. It was nice getting out of the house while it was dark out.

“As much as I want to take credit, I can’t. This was Rafe’s idea.” you looked at JJ with wide eyes, completely caught off guard.

“What?!” you all but screamed, not sure why JJ would ever talk to Rafe about you. Especially since you hadn’t even told JJ that you and Rafe were talking almost constantly.

“I’ll try to forgive you for not mentioning your budding relationship, but yea. Rafe came to me and apologized for everything last summer and although I don’t forgive him. He does talk pretty highly about you and I can't deny that.” JJ explained and you couldn’t have been more proud to call him your best friend in these moments.

Once you arrived, JJ snuck you in the back and you couldn’t help but take a peek out and notice Rafe standing by the bar dressed in a navy colored suit with his dad who looked like he was scolding him for something. He looked good, really good. JJ pulled you into the locker room handing you a uniform with a white shirt and a black vest to put over it and informing you that you were on drink serving duty. You made your rounds looking over at Rafe every so often wanting nothing more than to approach him. You noticed Rafe's dad pulling him away from the crowd with a yank to his collar and watching as he stood in front of him yelling and pointing a finger in his face. Your feet were moving before your brain could process it and before you knew it you were in front of the two.

“Hi, can I get you guys anything to drink?” you put the sweetest smile on your face, hoping it wouldn’t be obvious that you were trying to distract Rafe’s dad. Ward cleared his throat before looking at you and ordering a whiskey on the rocks with a fake smile on his face. Rafe took the opportunity to make a break for it while you wrote down his fathers drink, exactly what you hoped would happen. After returning to Ward with his drink you went looking for Rafe only to find him back inside the club.

“Oh look who it is, my savior.” Rafe teased, watching you approach him before pulling out a chair for you to sit next to him. “Thanks for that by the way, you didn’t have to.”

“Of course I did, I understand family issues all too well, Cameron.” you laughed, taking the seat beside him.

“I’m surprised to see you here, so much for that curfew huh?” Rafe smirked, eyeing you from across the table.

“Funny enough, JJ came up with this super smart plan to sneak me out. Usually he’s not that on top of it, but I guess something changed.” you joked and reached for Rafe’s hand across the table. “Thank you for talking to him, you have no idea how much it means to me.”

“I know it sounds weird, but I think I would do anything for you.” Rafe blushed, squeezing your hand in his and putting his head down to hide the pink tint on his cheeks. You pulled your hand from his and reached up to lift his face to look at your before moving in closer to him. Your lips brushed his softly before he pulled you closer by your waist and your lips molded to each other and you melted into your first kiss with Rafe.

“Uh, sorry to interrupt but Y/N your aunts outside.” you pulled away from Rafe hearing JJ’s voice and you couldn’t believe what you heard. You looked between the boys with a horrified expression on your face and walked passed JJ outside to where your aunt and cousins were standing and causing a scene.

“Where the hell is she?!” you frowned, running up to them, hoping you could get her to leave without losing your job.

“There you are! You ungrateful piece of trash! How dare you sneak out with this scum of a boy!?” with each word your ugly aunt used her finger to push on her chest and you felt the anger bubbling up inside of you.

“Don’t touch me! And don’t talk about him like that. I’m 18 now, you can’t tell me what to do anymore!” you pushed her hand away, yelling back in her face with JJ and Rafe watching you from a few feet away, everyone else at the party enjoying the show.

“I sure as hell can if you’re living under MY roof!” you could hear your cousins laughing from behind her and that only fueled more anger in you.

“Don’t worry about me, because I'm moving out.” you finally had it, you couldn’t take dealing with her for another second longer. Unbeknownst to you, Rafe and JJ were sharing knowing looks at each other as the scene unfolded in front of them.

“And where do you think you’re gonna go?”

“With us!” JJ spoke up, and you felt him take a place at your side with Rafe following his actions on your other side.

“Good luck with that. They’ll be tired of you soon enough, don’t come crawling back.” your aunt scoffed, rolling her eyes at the two boys and retreating back to her SUV, “Girls! Here! Now!”

You felt tears start to roll down your cheeks and you laughed feeling both the boys wrap their arms around you. “Everything’s gonna be okay now, y/n.”

“Jeez, I don’t know what to say. Thank you guys for being here.” The rest of the party goers were clapping at you standing up for yourself and finally being free of her even though they didn’t know you or your situation.

“You don’t have to thank us, Y/N.” Rafe smiled as you pulled him into a tight hug feeling safe as his arms wrapped around you.

••epilogue••

Summer was officially over and you were sad to be moving on, but you could easily say this was the best summer of your entire life. After the screaming match with your aunt you moved in with JJ and John B and yes it was tough adjusting to living with boys but it was amazing. You were finally getting close with the other pogues Rafe’s sister Sarah and you just wish you hadn’t waited 4 years for it to happen.

Rafe did some digging with a private investigator and found a savings account in your name for your full college tuition that your aunt had been hiding from you. Everything was falling into place for you and speaking of Rafe: you guys were officially dating and going two months strong. You felt the happiest you ever had in your entire life and he was partly to thank for that.

You wound up going to Princeton together and lived happily ever after. At least for now. Hey, you’re only a freshman.

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[writingwithcolor]

B’nei mitzvah in spaceship without Jewish community | Jewish character celebrating Christmas

Hi! Thank you so much for running this blog. I appreciate how much time and effort all the mods have put into it. I finished reading through the whole Jewish tag a few days ago, and I’ve learned so much! I’m writing a Voltron fic (I *know* lol) and decided to make one of the protagonists a white nonbinary Ashkenazi Reform Jewish girl. Her astronaut brother mysteriously disappears in space and is presumed dead, so she runs away from home a couple of months before her b'nei mitzvah to find him. Now, she’s in a group of rebels in space fighting against an Empire. I have two concerns:

1. Everyone on the ship misses home, so part of the way they cope is through getting in touch with their cultures. They’re gonna celebrate (a mostly non-Americanized) Christmas because it matters a lot to some of the characters for non-religious reasons. To what extent can my Jewish character participate in the celebration without it being weird? I want her to enjoy herself more because she’s with her friends than because Jesus etc. They’ll also celebrate Chanukah, if that helps. I know Chanukah isn’t a major holiday, so I also want to have her celebrate a more significant one like Rosh Hashanah and/or Purim with them. Is it okay for gentiles to participate in those holiday celebrations, or should she do that alone?

2. Throughout most of the story, she’ll struggle with choosing whether to prioritize fighting the Empire or finding her brother and bringing him home. When she eventually does find her brother (who also turns out to be a rebel), he lets her decide whether they stay or go home. I thought it would be nice if she decided to stay and keep fighting for the greater good after she finally has her b'nei mitzvah. Her friends and other experiences are also a big part of why she decides to stay, but the b'nei mitzvah would be what gives her the final push she needs to decide. I don’t know if it would be okay for me to write the ceremony itself or if she can even have one if only two of the eight people on the ship are Jewish. I read that not everyone has a b'nei mitzvah and that it’s not required, but I feel like it’d be a big deal to her character. Should I keep the b'nei mitzvah idea, or am I heading towards appropriative territory here?

I want to make her Jewishness a big part of her character’s growth, and I really want to make sure I do it respectfully and accurately. I plan on finding a sensitivity reader when I’ve made more progress with actually writing everything out. Thank you for any insight you might offer!

It feels off to me to join a community symbolically when you’re far away FROM the community. Why not just have had her already have done the ceremony before she has all these adventures? That way it could just be a straightforward story about a Jewish teen having exciting heroic adventures in space, rather than a story about what happens when you have to miss aspects of Jewish life because you’re in space. It would also make the “….well, I guess I’m around for Christmas” bit less weighted because then that would be the only one of those instead of having two of those.

–Shira 

I’ll cover some other territory here. For those who don’t know, b'nei mitzvah is something you just automatically become at the correct age, the ceremony is simply to celebrate that with the community. Not all people have the ceremony, but if you are Jewish, and of age (for religious purposes), your status changes with or without it. Personally, I’m comfortable with showing a Jewish character finding a way to have a Jewish celebration when the circumstances are less than ideal, for me the other aspects of the story are more troubling. 

On the subject of having a Jewish character celebrate Christmas with their friends… look I don’t like this trope. There are many Jewish people, who are completely secular, who don’t celebrate Christmas, because it is explicitly a Christian holiday, and secular Jewish people are still Jewish. Some Jewish people (secular or otherwise) do choose to celebrate other holidays, and I am very comfortable with those folks telling their own stories. What I’m not happy with is the push from outside of the community for every Jewish character to slide into assimilation. 

Some Jewish people will go to Christmas parties and not eat the food, because they keep kosher, or won’t stay for a tree-lighting, because that feels like it goes too far, or will give presents but not receive them. There are a huge number of ways we might handle Christmas, and I appreciate that you plan to show holidays other than just Chanukah (and yes, it’s fine for non-Jewish characters to join her in her holidays, if she invites them), but I always question why a non-Jewish writer is so keen to show Jewish characters celebrating Christmas. The most generous version of me wants to assume that you get so much out of Christmas that you want to share it, but the part of me that knows about the pressures to assimilate, and the history of increased antisemitic violence around Christmas thinks… just leave this kid alone. She missed her celebration, she’s far from her community, and now she has to go put on a Happy Assimilated Smile for the culturally Christian folks around her. From a nonbinary Jewish perspective, it’s a little unusual for your nonbinary character to use she/her pronouns, and use b'nei mitzvah as a gender neutral alternative to the gendered bat mitzvah. In secular life, at least in the US, it’s not uncommon for people to use multiple pronouns, but I haven’t met, or even heard of, a single person using gendered pronouns secularly, and using new neutral alternatives religiously. It absolutely could happen but, because it is so unusual, to me it reads as either invalidating the character’s gender, or tokenizing her in the religious sphere. 

–Dierdra 

Shira, I think that’s a really good idea to make the character post-b'nei mitzvah. That way you just have a Jewish character having adventures rather than her culture being The Conflict. (And also, a pre-b'nei mitzvah seems a bit young for this storyline? Can she really consent to fighting alongside the rebels? Do they habitually take unaccompanied children on their ship? To me a teenager would make more sense, but hey it’s not my story!)

Dierdra, your answer regarding the Christmas aspect was awesome and really thorough. Thanks for your thoughts on the pronouns as well, it also jarred with me but I was waiting to hear your opinion as you have lived experience. My worry is if you use gender neutral terms for one but not the other, you risk falling into to the stereotype that only marginalised religious folks have to change our language etc to be inclusive to LGBTQ+ people, but everyone else is fine. 

I wanted to come back to the point about Rosh Hashana. First of all, thank you for acknowledging that we have holidays that are more important than Chanukah! Sooo many OP’s don’t know that. In terms of how she would celebrate it, I agree it’s fine to invite non-Jewish people along. However, given how community-based Jewish life is, making her keep Yom Tov on her own feels a bit like a torture story, especially when others have people to celebrate Christmas with. I wonder if you’ve thought about giving her a Jewish friend on the ship? Especially if you want her Jewishness to be part of her growth as you mentioned, an older Jewish friend and mentor could be a huge help :)

–Shoshi

As you can see, we have a wide range of possibilities for “what happens when you ask a Jewish person about celebrating Christmas.” I didn’t mind hanging around it as an outsider myself until a certain subset of Christians started being mean-spirited about it in the news plus some personal trauma that time of year, as long as everyone involved was clear that I was just participating from the outside and this didn’t somehow change me. (If I may make an analogy: compare it to going to a baby shower when you want to support your friend or family member but also really don’t want kids of your own. You’re going to have a whole different experience if your decision is respected vs. if all the other guests treat you like you being there means you’ll change your mind about not wanting kids.)

That being said, it’s still all over the map. Some people IRL are okay even going to mass with their partner’s Catholic family (without participating in communion obvs.) Some would never, ever do that and are sitting here with shocked faces that I even typed that. But what becomes important is the way it’s written. Sitting around listening to the Christmas story is probably a bad fit for your fanfic, but helping other people bake Christmas cookies or put ornaments on a tree could work. The ornament thing could remind her of decorating a sukkah, and she could point that out to the others. 

I guess I’m saying is 

keep her participation secular, and 

keep her participation from leaning into the idea that we’re unhappy with our customs and would prefer to do it their way. 

I have literally never in my life felt jealous of the kids who “got to do Santa” (for example) and while I’m sure some kids were and they’re valid too, I think it’s important to show that it’s not a universal phenomenon.

–Shira

[spookyrobbins]

If you’re given a chance to rewrite how calzona left the show, how would you do it?

(I really love your work! You are an amazing writer.)

okay for my sanity we’re gonna pretend sara was staying for 13/14

i’m gonna leave the entirety of s12 alone but it’ll all work out you’ll see

so arizona gives callie the tickets at the end of s12 and that seems to be it, they’re done, things are very final with them for maybe the first time ever

callie is going to nyc with penny and sofia and she’s going to be happy, just like arizona wanted, that was the last thing arizona could give her

and so s13 opens and the viewer is expecting callie gone, but in sort of a mirror of how arizona ended the previous season, callie shows up with sofia at arizona’s door bc she was going to go, she got all the way to the airport but she couldn’t do it, arizona is sofia’s mom and sofia needs to stay in seattle; and arizona asks callie what she’s going to do and callie says she still needs to go to nyc and talk to penny and deal with the contract she signed for an attending position (arizona might quip about callie needing to grovel to bailey) - neither of them makes any indication about getting back together or anything of the like

so then callie’s gone for a bit and this is important bc arizona needs to meet eliza without callie immediately around

so then callie comes back in the middle of the revolt against eliza and callie is often blindly loyal and she’s hardcore seattle grace so she’d obvs be very much anti eliza

she’d also be the first one to really notice that eliza and arizona are kind of flirting - after all, she’d be the most qualified and she confronts arizona about sleeping with the person trying to oust webber and who got meredith suspended etc

this of course is right on the heels of the custody battle where callies lawyers essentially called arizona a slut so it’s an understandably tender spot for arizona - we get a fun little argument maybe with lines like “i guess i shouldn’t be surprised you have no loyalty” and “at least i’m not sleeping with someone who killed one of our friends” - they both say things they regret and arizona and eliza aren’t even sleeping together at this point

things are icey between them for a little while - everyone is a bit in their feelings - arizona really genuinely tries with eliza and callie throws herself into her work - but there’s still pining looks

and we can have scenes of callie bitching about arizona (bc let’s be real she was never quiet about things) to maybe bailey who doesn’t have a lot of time for it - opens the possibility for callie reflecting on the custody battle - over even more fun callie learning about the “you’re nothing” fight after making some comment about how arizona is being way too intense about schedules or something and bailey saying something to the effect of “maybe it’s because both you and sloan have called her nothing to that little girl, when we all know that sofia is her whole world, that sofia is all she has left”

there is also the possibility of callie complaining about arizona and eliza to someone and someone (maybe meredith or alex once he’s out of jail) saying something to the effect of “arizona never said a word about you moving on, in fact she supported you and was rather courteous about it so you don’t have a leg to stand on” - this portion of the season is very much callies come to jesus moment

and then we get to the season finale of 13 (hospital fire and rapist on the loose as a reminder) - arizona was outside of the hospital with eliza when the hospital exploded; callie was inside and freaked out about arizona bc honestly it would be very like arizona to find herself in the middle of an explosion

arizona of course goes back into help alex with peds and the nicu (eliza is supposed to call the police which is what gets her fired i seem to recall)

so callie takes off looking for arizona but she can’t find her and bc it’s arizona she assumed the worst bc when isn’t it the worst when it comes to arizona and it really puts callies confused feelings into perspective at the thought of maybe losing arizona

meanwhile arizona (all essentially off screen) is dealing with peds and fetal and she’s totally fine just lots of stressed out kids and parents

but callie can’t find her bc there’s just too much going on at least not until it’s basically morning and the fires out and callie sees arizona across the parking lot with alex and in sort of a mirror of the post shooting kiss, tells arizona she loves her and can’t live with out her and she’s sorry it took her so long to realise this, but after the kiss arizona pushes her away and says she can’t do this again

and that ends s13

s14 in the show of course starts with eliza ghosting arizona who then meets carina in a bar and as much as i adore carina i’m afraid she does not get to hook up with arizona

instead eliza still ghosts arizona and then arizona and callie go out for a drink to discuss everything that happened a few days ago and how arizona is feeling about owen’s sister suddenly being found alive when she went mia/kia in not dissimilar circumstances to tim (bc this is my season we get to discuss my love tim)

no confessions of love but they do fall into bed with each other and this is probably a mistake but somehow they keep making it and so then we get arizona and callie basically sleeping together in secret

and all the while callies confession is hanging over their heads but they are not discussing it bc they’re callie and arizona and god forbid they act like grown ups and discuss their feelings instead of just having sex

that is until arizona loses karin (april’s ex’s wife) and it throws her into a depression and callies been here before, she’s had to handle arizona’s depression before and she knows now that she mishandled it and she’s not going to do that again

so she goes to arizona and arizona sort of reluctantly tries to have sex with her but callie turns her down and this turns into an argument but it’s not a bad argument, it’s more of a cathartic argument of callie trying to prove that she’s changed, that they’ve changed and they’re stronger, better than they were before while arizona is torn between fear and telling callie she loves her too - end result they agree to try one more time with a whole variety of stipulations and guidelines

for hm maybe an episode things are fine and light and happy and a pretty pink bubble with them

that is until callie finds out by accident that arizona has been offered the chance to run hopkins fetal dept/have her own research/learning facility there and it’s been blessed by herman - and when asked about it, arizona avoids the question and callie is understandably hurt

on arizona’s side, she’s freaking out bc she knows what happens when she’s given huge career opportunities and she’s with callie - callie resents her for it and they break up and she can’t put them through another custody debacle so when mccale (her peds mentor) and herman offered her the position she basically just kicked the can down the road - this is all made worse by the fact she knows it’s not that callie isn’t open to a move, it’s a move with arizona that callie won’t do

so things are weird between the two of them and pretty much no one wants to get involved and even sofia is picking up on it and she starts acting out in school - maybe gets in a fight or something, which sends arizona and callie into this weird proxy argument about parenting which is very much a soft spot for arizona

by the time of the breast cancer ep, they haven’t broken up (bc at the start they agreed if they broke up they wouldn’t try again) but they’re not really speaking - sort of like how they were in the early stages of the baby fight - but when arizona thinks she has breast cancer the only person she wants is callie - so we get this great part-comedic part-heartfelt scene of owen, april, callie and arizona in an exam room with arizona’s boobs out and callie blurts out that she knows that arizona has a huge job offer from hopkins and she’s really hurt that arizona didn’t tell her bc she thinks she should take it (april and owen leave bc arizona’s boobs are still fully out as they talk) and arizona admits that she didn’t even want to entertain it bc she can’t lose callie again and then callie gets to finally (after like 10 years) actually be excited about arizona’s career and arizona also admits that she managed to get hopkins to agree to give callie head of ortho research or something and her own lab bc they’re interested in the artificial cartilage or prosthetics or something

after like an episode of discussion they decide to move - it’s a huge opportunity for arizona, callie will be able to focus on her research, arizona loved hopkins, the robbins live somewhat close by and it’s a lot closer to miami, and they both agree that maybe it’s time to leave seattle

then we get the weed cookie episode and just like fluffy calzona shenanigans (which are going to be featured in an upcoming fix)

when april is half frozen, callie is very much there for arizona and it’s very evident that they’re stronger than before

and they get say all their goodbyes (which arizona got but callie didn’t really) in the alex wedding episode, they stay for april’s wedding and then they’re off, happily ever after to hopkins

[aiden-png]

Inhibitions

I was thinking about FSA tolerance headcanons again sooo XD I love Blue being a lightweight and Red being ridiculously good at holding his liquor.. putting Green in the middle and Vio closer to Red, or at least having Vio be good at hiding how drunk he is. but that got me thinking about Vio and Green drinking alone together, not having to worry about keeping up facades or staying alert for threats... anddddd now have a fluffy Vio/Green ficlet! (obv warning for legal drinking/drunkenness but it’s totally sfw!)

“Rough day?”

Green looked up from his lap, blinking the fog from his eyes to find Vio standing in the entryway. Vio gave him a look, equal measures knowing and tired, and Green only chuckled as he turned back to the sword in his lap. He’d zoned out sharpening it some time ago it seemed, the house now quiet, crickets chirping beyond the windowpanes. He sighed, sliding the blade into its sheath as Vio approached.

“Not any rougher than the rest,” Green relented, and Vio scoffed, tone full of humor.

“No use worrying about it now. It’s late, you should relax for once,” Vio hummed, and when Green looked up again he noticed the bottle in Vio’s hand. The taller man lifted it, a glimmer in his eye. “What do you say?”

Green smiled, and Vio settled onto the couch beside him with poised ease. The bottle was dark glass, expensive liquor from the tavern in town. Green couldn’t remember the last time he went--nor the last time either of them drank. Vio wasn’t usually the type, preferring to keep his wits about him and tease Blue as he quickly became drunk. Green didn’t drink with the others either, not really, even when Red pleaded and Blue tried to bait him with drinking contests. He was always on edge when they were out, too tense not to keep an eye out for any evil lurking in the shadows.

Vio handed him the bottle, the cap mysteriously missing. At least when they were home, Green didn’t have to keep on the defensive. He took a swig, wincing at the burning taste of it until it radiated warmth in his chest. Vio laughed softly as Green handed the bottle back, taking a drink of his own, face a perfect mask of calm at the taste.

“Not bad,” Vio murmured as he pulled back. He handed the bottle over again and smiled, settling in. “So, tell me about your day.”

Green lost track of time as the night wore on, the warmth in his body smoothing away any lingering worries from the day. The next thing he knew, he was crackling up over something Vio had said--something so deadpan and innocuous that when he sat back up, the world tilted dangerously, and Green realized how plastered he must be.

Vio didn’t seem to notice, or at least he didn’t comment, taking his turn drinking from the bottle. There was a light dusting of pink on his cheeks, his eyes just a bit more lidded than usual, but otherwise he appeared much the same as before. When the bottle returned to his hand he tilted it back and forth, trying to judge just how full it was. At least half, though the glass was heavy and dark, so maybe more? He took another drink and some spilled down his chin, making him yelp as Vio chuckled beside him. He wiped his mouth, cheeks heating as he grinned.

“I’m drunk.”

“So it seems,” Vio took the bottle again, inspecting it much the same. The sharp, analytical edge was still there, but... “Guess I can handle my liquor better than you, too.”

There was a haziness in Vio’s eyes, and Green smirked as he began to drink again. “Makes sense. You’ve got the most practice, after all.”

Vio nearly choked, and when he pulled back a startled laugh fell from his lips. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Do you really expect me to believe you and Shadow were drinking ‘evil rootbeer’, Vio? We’re not kids anymore,” Green stifled his laughter behind a hand as Vio rolled his eyes. “That lie wasn’t good back then, even for you.”

“Alright, fine, you caught me,” Vio huffed, but he was grinning as he shoved the bottle back at Green. “Shadow and I may have drunk some things we should not have. What can I say, I was trying to play the part.”

“Yeah, but you liked it,” Green grinned, giggling when Vio’s cheeks flushed darker. “Did you let yourself go back then? You must’ve if you and Shadow became so close--”

“Oh-- Give me that,” Vio huffed, pulling the bottle away again. He took a long drink, and when he pulled back his face was definitely red. “‘m not drunk enough for this conversation.”

“Are you now?” Green waggled his eyebrows.

Vio took another swig and Green doubled over with laughter.

“Alright, okay,” Vio mumbled, shoving the bottle back into Green’s hands as he rubbed at his face. “You need to drink more of that-- Goddesses help me if I say something embarrassing and you remember it.”

Green could barely stop laughing long enough to drink again, the liquor tasting more like apple juice than fire the drunker he got. He was warm and heavy and pleasantly relaxed now, but with Vio so flustered he couldn’t resist his curiosity now.

“So, you’re an honest drunk then?” Green smirked, and Vio eyed him with amusement. “Gonna tell me some secrets then?”

“Shut up,” Vio groaned, hiding a smile behind his hand. “Goddesses, I had no idea you were a flirty drunk. I never would’ve agreed to this--”

“What? Vi, I’m offended!” Green swooned back on the couch, grinning wide. “Me? A flirt? You’re a married man, I could never!”

Like music to Green’s ears, Vio began to laugh. It wasn’t the subdued, shy laughter or sarcastic chuckling either--but real, snorting laughter, absolutely honest and unflattering as Vio tried to stifle the sound. His eyes glistened with tears as he shook his head, absolutely beaming as Green stared, transfixed by the sight.

“I-- I’m not married, I’m not even dating--” Vio managed as he caught his breath. The flush on his cheeks and the unfiltered joy that sparkled in his eyes was too much for Green’s poor heart, and he hastily took another drink to calm its racing. “Shadow and I messed around, but that was years ago, Goddesses Green, it was all hormones and alcohol and lowered inhibitions...”

Vio sighed, shaking his head. When he looked back up, there was a fond, lopsided smile on his face, and Green felt his breath catch in his throat.

“Lowered inhibitions?” Green murmured.

When had Vio gotten that close? Their legs were pressed together now, sometime between Vio’s laughing fit and Green’s inevitable plunge off the deep end. Vio laughed, plucking the bottle from Green’s hands and taking another swig. He frowned as he pulled back, swirling the glass--it was empty.

“Yeah, y’know, like,” Vio waved his free hand around aimlessly, struggling with words for the first time Green could remember. The small pout on Vio’s lips when he failed to concentrate, his face scrunching up in drunken annoyance--so cute. “Oh, whatever, you know what I mean.”

“Nope,” Green shifted forward. He could smell the booze on Vio, mixing with his strong scent of lavender. His head spun, it was intoxicating. “Dunno that word. Give me an example?”

Vio huffed, eyes roaming just a bit too slow over Green. “Alcohol makes you feel funny things, doesn’t it? Like attraction.”

Green swallowed, bobbed his head. He wasn’t sure what he was agreeing with, but Vio laughed, so it must’ve been right. He couldn’t take his eyes off Vio’s perfect, thin lips, watching them move without paying attention to the words that came out.

A hand slipped into his hair, a bit clumsy, and Green finally looked back up. Oh, Vio was close now, their faces just inches away. Green’s breath shuddered out as Vio’s hand cupped the back of his neck, tangling in his hair.

“I still don’t understand,” Green murmured, tongue feeling heavy in his mouth. “Show me?”

Vio sighed, smiling as he pressed their foreheads together. “You better not regret this in the morn--”

Green slipped forward, and their lips finally connected.

---

Green woke the next morning to a pounding headache, a sore back, and with his head resting on Vio’s chest. He shifted, grunting in discomfort until an arm held him back against Vio’s side. The couch was barely big enough, their legs tangled and half falling off the side, but... Green sighed, settling down once more. It was barely dawn yet, and he wasn’t ready to forget the night just yet.

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruby & Cosmo

Ruby: Dying to know is every date colour coded? ❤️

Cosmo: Oh, God 😅 How unintentionally cringe

Cosmo: That sums up how well it went, sadly

Ruby: the quick reply had me thinking you were back early or answering in the middle of dinner

Cosmo: 🤫

Cosmo: I’d never!

Cosmo: It was a favour and I think that showed

Cosmo: She’s my cousin’s friend and just got dumped, sweet girl but perhaps not ready to be great company

Ruby: explains the 🌹

Cosmo: Not very personal or too basic?

Ruby: a nice try if it was your first date ever but I know it’s not

Cosmo: Thank God I didn’t get another bouquet 😏

Cosmo: They weren’t buy one get one free though, before you say

Ruby: they looked expensive

Ruby: she would’ve felt guilty throwing them back in your face

Cosmo: I told you I weren’t texting under the table, why would she need to?

Ruby: you told me why, they’re impersonal & basic

Ruby: & heartbreak makes you unhinged

Cosmo: I wouldn’t call her unhinged

Cosmo: at least not to her face, right

Ruby: 😅

Ruby: or your cousin’s

Ruby: Are you staying out in town or going home to change?

Cosmo: I don’t fancy showing up in the club in this

Cosmo: never mind hearing what my friends would have to say

Cosmo: What are you up to?

Ruby: the VIP area has seen worse, you don’t look like you raided the Gucci sale rail, eyes closed

Ruby: & your friends have worn worse, but I won’t say it to their faces

Ruby: I’m waiting for my own friends to be done making their own questionable outfit choices as usual

Cosmo: Careful, that was almost a compliment and not just a drag of the lads

Cosmo: not undeserved on their end but what did I do to make you decide to be nice to me?

Cosmo: besides entertain you with my dating woes whilst they redo their makeup, again

Ruby: You know how to dress, it’s a fact

Ruby: & I didn’t decide to be nice, it just happened

Cosmo: Not that you’re not usually nice in general

Cosmo: but here I am, feeling special, like 💖🤩

Cosmo: It’s also a fact, though not an impressive one, that I’m not lame enough to go in for that negging bullshit, so whatever I end up doing, calling you a bitch ain’t on the agenda

Ruby: there you were down in the dumps about your disaster date, I thought I’d try to help

Ruby: I wouldn’t, it only works for Mason when everyone’s too busy watching his feet move to care about his mouth & that’s not the audience you’ve got atm

Cosmo: I think I’ll survive

Cosmo: but I appreciate it

Cosmo: I’ve seen him get in trouble for his mouth plenty of times on the pitch

Cosmo: but referees aren’t ones to be sweet-talked so…

Ruby: your expensive roses are wasted on them 🥀

Cosmo: That is the real tragedy 💔

Cosmo: I reckon 🍷 could work on your dad though, whaddya think?

Ruby: aren’t we beyond bribes? I thought we were

Cosmo: You don’t have to go up for contract renewals

Cosmo: but I was joking, so don’t tell him he’s on a promise there

Ruby: oh yeah, it’s a joke you being worried you won’t get renewed

Ruby: he doesn’t shut up about you after a few 🍷’s with your dad

Cosmo: Sorry you’ve had to witness/hear that

Cosmo: can’t help my case

Ruby: it wouldn’t be realistic to entertain you or let you entertain me if he wasn’t on board

Cosmo: No?

Ruby: secrecy & sneaking around would be impossible unless we could both drop what we were doing at a moment’s notice, which we can’t

Cosmo: True

Cosmo: Neither of us has the time for that

Ruby: or the anonymity

Cosmo: You aren’t wrong

Ruby: 💖🤩 back at me?

Ruby: you’re being agreeable, above & beyond the Sunday roast standard you set when everyone was listening in

Cosmo: Agreeable from you I can take

Cosmo: I didn’t know any of you guys were going to be there, so if I wasn’t on top form

Cosmo: I’d love to have a second chance to do it better, of course

Cosmo: Somewhere more exciting than family dinner

Cosmo: and no impersonal and basic 🌹s

Ruby: I’d love to skip the club tonight, it stopped being exciting forever ago

Ruby: there’s your chance

Cosmo: Alright

Cosmo: I’ll make something happen and I’ll send you the place and the dress code

Ruby: pastel colours wash me out

Cosmo: What kind of place would be pastels only? 🤔

Ruby: [name drop somewhere boujee that you’ve been probably with your mum and godmother lol]

Ruby: you wasted the ❤️ on the wrong girl 💔

Cosmo: She wasn’t wearing red

Ruby: it was never going to work out

Cosmo: That might be for the best

Ruby: tbd

Ruby: but I’m not feeling like I’ll cry or talk about any of my exes so it’ll be better for you

Cosmo: And for you

Cosmo: not that you’re letting me be impressive with a bar that low but you know

Ruby: you’ll get over or under it if you want to

Cosmo: If I couldn’t rise to the occasion your dad definitely wouldn’t stand for it

Ruby: I won’t either

Cosmo: tbd

Cosmo: I heard

Ruby: another girl has beat me to denying you everything, I have no choice but to switch it up to keep things interesting

Cosmo: Has hard-to-get worked since the days of negging?

Cosmo: You’ve got all the choices, and no need to play any sort of game with me

Cosmo: Let’s have a good time

Ruby: it might have worked for people who want a different reputation than I do

Ruby: that’d wash me out too, the whole projection of intense cold bitch energy

Ruby: a good time is more doable

Cosmo: It wouldn’t get you very far, I understand

Cosmo: We all have to be some type of way to get to where we need to be

Ruby: yeah & talent has to be backed up with 😁✨

Cosmo: A winning personality, of course

Ruby: if I don’t have that both of my parents & coach are going to lose it, definitely

Cosmo: Well, you don’t need to worry about that, from my perspective

Ruby: from my POV neither of us will be worrying until the alarm wakes us early tomorrow & it’ll be too late to stress it by then

Ruby: the good time’ll have already happened

Cosmo: I’ll drink to that

Cosmo: [something that’s between the restaurant moment we just took Savannah to and the normal clubs they would go to, idk what that would look like, like a club that’s a bit sassier than the beyond standard ones footballers and WAGs would hang in]

Cosmo: but I won’t start without you, like

Ruby: not counting the 🍷 if the 🍝 soaked it up

Ruby: but what do you want me to wear? 🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍🤎

Cosmo: ❤️ off the table then

Ruby: the bar hasn’t fallen through the floor, I’m not okaying you wearing the outfit you chose for her & me dressing to match it

Cosmo: 😅 I’ve gone home but alright

Cosmo: I want to see what you come up with, actually

Cosmo: I’ll show you I’ve got better than the jumper, don’t worry

Ruby: I’ll do better than a roast with the fam, talk about a low bar

Cosmo: I think you’re probably incapable of looking bad

Ruby: try keeping me up all night & you’ll see

Cosmo: I won’t be the first or the last to show up to practice feeling less than 💯 … are all the other ice skaters perfect 😇s?

Ruby: I’m not giving any details of who isn’t, you’re a date down tonight as is, I’m not getting ditched for someone even more 😈

Cosmo: About how that looks

Cosmo: ‘cos I know

Cosmo: We aren’t going to post anything are we?

Cosmo: I’m not looking to add to the poor girl’s 💔 and I know it’s a dick move to not even wait ‘til tomorrow

Ruby: 📵

Ruby: getting into a fight with your cousin over me is even more Romeo & Juliet than sneaking around behind my dad’s back, we all know how it ended

Ruby: drama in the routine is fine but off the ice it’s not cute

Cosmo: Drama on the pitch depends how you feel about diving

Cosmo: but I appreciate that

Ruby: how I feel about diving depends how much my brother has got to me & I want to get him back for it

Cosmo: 🟥 or 🟨 depending on the day

Ruby: 🟥 usually

Cosmo: I feel that

Cosmo: about my own, usually, not necessarily yours but I can see the how and why there too

Ruby: yours made an impression, not at all good

Cosmo: That’s his speciality

Ruby: 😬 brothers bring the mood down when they’re ours

Cosmo: Neither of them’s invited

Ruby: it’ll make a change not to see mine out

Cosmo: That’s unlucky

Ruby: but you’re on to a winner with the location, congrats

Cosmo: I had a good feeling

Ruby: I’ve got one too

Cosmo: 💖🤩

Ruby: a compliment to last until I get there

Cosmo: tbd 👋

Ruby: ❤️

Cosmo: [so obviously this night is gonna go better than the awkward date, though that’s not hard soz Savannah, but also a step above the standard club moment of every weekend hence we stay out longer than we usually do when we’ve got an early start tomorrow]

Ruby: [and equally as obviously if you found enough to talk about when you were around all your annoying relatives for that roast I’m not worried about you struggling for a convo tonight, you’re both cute and have things in common and there’s clearly a vibe]

Cosmo: [I don’t think anything needs to happen tonight but it’s obvious you like each other ‘cos you could both be bothered to show and do this]

Ruby: [agreed it feels legit to who you both are and your priorities to wanna take things a bit slower than that, like it’s clearly unlike her already to do this when you were literally on a date earlier and staying out later than planned is also something neither of you do a lot so]

Cosmo: [yes, we’re not that kind of boy, not saying you’ve never slept with anyone obvs lmao but we’re not a different gal every weekend energy at all]

Ruby: [likewise neither calling this gal a nun or a slag but I doubt she's been out with that many people cos of a) her busy schedule and b) the lowkey famous dad and brother thing that would make some lads wanna try it on for that reason]

Cosmo: [exactly dr phil, you wanna skip to the AM of it all?]

Ruby: [absolutely boo]

Cosmo: 🟥 or 🟨 for keeping you out past your bedtime then?

Ruby: Are you willing to take credit or am I blaming a messy friend’s man troubles?

Cosmo: That depends

Cosmo: we would have to find a friend we’d mutually not mind throwing under the bus and I’m not sure if my brain is capable rn

Ruby: it wouldn’t be taxing to mine to think up someone believable, if you’re keen to show up to my door with 💐 & fool my dad that it’s the first move you’ve made

Ruby: for rep’s sake

Cosmo: The 💔 is all around

Cosmo: a hangover will have you feeling that way

Cosmo: are YOU keen for me to show up at your door with 💐s, that’s the real question here

Ruby: I’ll start getting hangovers when I’m old, it’s a scare tactic before, not a real thing

Ruby: impressing my dad doesn’t necessarily impress me

Cosmo: 😂

Cosmo: That’s alright, I already have impressed him, so it’s definitely not my intention here

Ruby: let’s hear what your intentions are

Cosmo: Now you’re bragging about how un-hungover you are

Cosmo: How about you let me set up a second date and we can talk about it then?

Ruby: a brag would have a selfie attached, I was reassuring you I’m not suffering mild alcohol poisoning like most of our friends

Ruby: a second date for when?

Cosmo: I’m pleased to hear it

Cosmo: it doesn’t make for a pretty sight

Cosmo: [pisstakey shot of some of the lads dying in the changing room or wherever like ew lol]

Cosmo: Send me your calendar and I’ll see?

Ruby: 😬 lovely [but send him something similar of the girls obvs and then your calendar of course, I’m cackling because what if the only time they can both do is tonight so that looks really extra when you’re both not]

Cosmo: They’d kill us for that 😏

Cosmo: [we so could, lmao okay]

Cosmo: Well, it looks like either we double down and go for tonight or we give it a rain check and see in a couple weeks 🤔

Ruby: tonight works for me but it’s you who’d be doing the work to think of somewhere else with wow factor

Cosmo: Undefeated with two wins sounds a lot better than one

Ruby: yeah & I don’t want to talk about weeks on the bench

Cosmo: Be a bit of a dirty tactic to put the blame on you for not going out with me tonight if I get benched but

Cosmo: If it works I’m not above it

Cosmo: So, what kind of place are you looking to avoid tonight?

Ruby: do we need to avoid anywhere or flash photography? your cousin & the girl they forced you to date can’t stay mad forever

Cosmo: No, we don’t have to

Ruby: 💖🤩

Cosmo: Understood

Cosmo: I’ll get back to you

Ruby: 🚫🍷🥃🍸🍹 can be tonight’s rule if you need a break

Cosmo: I don’t

Cosmo: I just needed to know what you want to do, and now I do and I’m thinking

Ruby: I know you don’t need it to have or be fun, me either hopefully

Cosmo: I think you’re fun

Cosmo: and it’s definitely tragic if you have to rely on something like that, that’s not me

Ruby: it’s nobody I know or would count as worth knowing

Cosmo: Totally

Cosmo: Okay, I’m going on the pitch, send you deets later

Ruby: don’t mess up or I’m going to cancel tonight & I don’t want to so that’ll be us both in bad moods 😘

[jq37]

The Royal Report– A Crown of Candy Ep 1

There Is Strength in Sweetness 

Much like the years, the seasons of D20 start coming and they don’t stop coming. Fantasy High: Sophomore Year is barely in the record books and we’re already jumping into our new season--the Game of Thrones/Candyland mashup: A Crown of Candy!

If y’all have been with me since Sophomore Year then you know that I did very in depth recaps of every episode with a very specific format but I’m gonna try something new for this season.

The format might change a little between episodes as I figure out what works best so bear with me but the plan is to do more highlights and opinions than a blow by blow. But, like, we’ll see what happens.

So, anyway, saddle up your Meep and let’s visit Candia--one of the six kingdoms of the land of Calorum (aka: a fridge. We see you Brennan, it’s a fridge). Twenty years ago, the Ravening Wars wreaked havoc but they’re currently in a time of peace which (mostly) everybody is psyched about.

Meet the Family

This is not a new observation but, while most seasons of Fantasy High focus on found family, this season is all about family-family, specifically, the royal family of Candia and their associates. 

We’re first introduced to Murph’s character--Sir Theobald Gumbar (Level 3 Eldritch Knight)--who is the a huge, golden-armored, gummy bear, leader of the Tartguard, protector of the royal family, and the logical endpoint of Murph’s lawful good predilections. Sir Theo is, of course, on time with bells on for the big Saint’s Day/Coming of Age birthday party for the twin princesses of House Rocks. Unfortunately, he’s clearly never seen The Little Mermaid because when the heralds announce the princesses, they don’t show up. Frustrated, he goes to try and find them.

The first place he checks is with Zac’s character, Chancellor Lapin Cadbury (Level 3 Celestial Warlock). He is (in no particular order) the royal tutor, a chocolate bunny, an official of the main state sanctioned church of Calorum (the Bulbian Church), and a pompous ass. Oh, one more thing? He and Theobald can’t stand each other. There is nothing funnier than two very proper grown men who hate each other's guts. Sir Theo shows up to his classroom where the princesses are having a lesson--or at least they’re supposed to be. Further inspection shows that they’ve just left two straw dummies in their place. Classic.

So, we pan out to the city to meet my favorite characters so far (I absolutely play favorites but I also disclose when I’m doing it so I think I’m in the clear) the twin princesses/chaos gremlins--Jet and Ruby Rocks (both level 1 Rogues) played by Emily and Siobhan. Theo may not have seen The Little Mermaid but the twins have def seen Aladdin, because their number one pastime seems to be escaping the palace to roam the city--hilariously illustrated when they chuck a gem into a peasant's bag and his reaction is a super nonplussed, “Guess the princesses escaped again.” They’re got the Disney Princess-itis really bad because both of them feel stifled by palace life and want more--specifically, Jet wants to be a warrior and resents having been born in peacetime (especially since she’s slightly older and in line for the throne) and Ruby wants to run off and join the circus as an acrobat. They are total twin BFFs to the point that their Thieves Cant has been reskinned to Twinspeak which is a detail I love so much (and that will become unspeakably tragic if something happens to one of them Brennan). 

Jet gets a letter from her secret crush Thad, an Avocado from Fructera (these are the sentences I am being forced to write this season folks) and schemes with Ruby about how they can get to Comida (the capital city) to meet him--possibly by sweet talking Theobald which is easy because he’s so thirsty for respect. Sure enough, Theobald and Lapin soon find them, following their path of destruction and the princesses are brought back to the castle.

Back at the castle, we’re introduced to Lou’s character--King Amethar Rocks (Level 3 Storm Herald Barbarian)--who is having a somber moment, surrounded by the statues of his four older sisters who died in the Ravening Wars, leading his reluctant taking of the throne. He’s interrupted by Lord Calroy (his right hand guy and a full ass talking slice of cake because Brennan is trying to break me this season but I refuse to give him the satisfaction) who lets him know that his daughters have escaped and his delighted reaction immediately lets us know which side of the family they take after.

Finally (at least wrt PCs), we meet Ally’s character--Liam Wilhelmina of House Jawbreaker (Level 2 Ranger) who is a political prisoner/ward of House Rocks and a soft, outdoorsy, mountain kid who is perpetually followed around by his pet pig--Peppermint Preston whose death will absolutely force to me to Google “Best Denny’s Parking Lots for Fistfights.” He misses his dad but not his dick brothers because Ally isn’t allowed to have a fully happy family in any season. Liam is from the disgraced House Jawbreaker and his brothers seem to expect him to try and off the King while he’s in their orbit. While he’s in the woods, looking for seeds (as one does) he finds and accidentally breaks an important looking teacup, which we’ll get back to.

The other important character we meet this episode is an NPC--Queen Caramelinda, mother of the princesses, wife of Amethar, and keeper of 100% of the impulse control of House Rocks. She’s the main disciplinarian to Jet and Ruby, the clear decision-maker in the kingdom, and the only literate one out of her and her husband. She also seems to be the only character that respects Lapin’s authority. 

An Inciting Incident

So, with all our characters assembled, all that’s left is the plot hook which Caramelinda provides in the form of a personal letter from Emperor Gustavo--the head honcho of the entire realm and his old friend--to Amethar. He’s not doing well health-wise and he needs to name an heir that’s not related to him at a big tourney that he’s personally inviting Amethar to. Amethar is a little slow on the uptake but Caramelinda eventually connects to dots for him that it seems very likely that Gustavo is going to name him emperor.

Amethar is not vibing with that information at all but Caramelinda basically holds him by the ear until he reluctantly agrees to go--though he insists that Ruby and Jet also come along to keep him company. Caramelinda only agrees on the condition that Lapin goes with. She also invites Liam (who is caught off guard but game) and Sir Theo is basically going by default. Caramelinda is staying home to hold down the fort but the talking slice of cake is going because Brennan hates me and doesn’t want me to be happy. 

The traveling party is chosen, the twins have been gifted with sick, inherited weapons from their aunts: Flickorice--the Twizzing Blade (Jet) and Sourscratch--the Puckering Bow (Ruby). It’s almost time to be off, but there’s still one last thing to get to before we leave the twins’ party. 

Lapin, feeling the pull of something broken (told you we’d get back to it) subtly makes his way outside, but is followed by Jet and Liam. Now, if you remember, I said earlier that Lapin is an official of the Bulbian church. Which is why it’s so surprising for Jet and Liam to see him talking to the Sugarplum Fairy, a deity of the Sweetening Path--a non-sanctioned more animistic religion that really only has sway in Candia. He fixes the teacup and then she appears, telling him that he’ll need to be wary once he leaves her sphere of influence and that boldness will be required in the days to come. Lapin, who seems to be having this conversation very begrudgingly, asks if she’s asking him to do anything in an official capacity and she smiles and says that she’s not asking for her third wish(!). Then what does she want? She wants him to know that there is great risk in what he is doing, but not acting is the greater risk. The coming challenges will be great, but he must protect the royal family or all is lost. She wouldn't have used her second wish to bring him to them if that weren’t the case. They hustle back and spill this to Ruby, obvs.

Anyway, onward! The next day, the caravan is set up and--with a warning about a sugar free chocolate warlock (ominous, as sugar free chocolate always is) they’re on their way to meet their escort out of Candia. Ruby decides to do her acrobat thing and is hanging out on top of the carriage instead of inside it as she and Jet “subtly” (read:not at all) bring up the Sugarplum Fairy to Lapin to see if he cracks.

Suddenly, the caravan stops. There’s a tree felled in the path, which really only means one thing in this kind of story. 

Ambush.

Ruby, outside of the carriage and unprotected, takes 16 points of damage and is fully down with a failed death save due to some unknown effect. The carriage is riddled with arrows. 

Everyone rolls for initiative and that takes us into a new (sure to be recurring) segment I’m calling:

Things I’m Concerned About

I’m concerned about Jet and Ruby (and not just because I’ve been worried about Ruby for a while due to things the cast has said and because she fully *died* this episode). They have their genres so wrong. They think they’re Disney movie protagonists but they’re in Game of Thrones and they don’t know it. Being Wrong Genre Savvy is a BAD position to find yourself in. Carriage surfing shenanigans don’t fly in a world that wants you dead.

OK, Carameinda. I’m inclined to be pro-Caramelinda. Like, she’s the hardass but she needs to be because Amethar isn’t helping run the kingdom. If this was a different story, she wouldn’t give me any pause but I read Macbeth and feel some light Lady Macbeth vibes. Gonna be keeping an eye on her.  

Calroy and Sir Toby (didn’t mention him, he’s a slightly lower ranked Gummi Bear guard and friends with Theo). In a story like this, I’m looking for the possible betrayals before I get blindsided and the only people who can really betray you are people who are supposedly loyal to you. Calroy had a little aside with Amethar about how he shouldn’t be the Emperor if he doesn’t want to be--which isn’t wrong but is also something someone angling to keep him off the throne for other reasons would say--and Sir Toby decided to stay behind to help hold down the fort--again, either an innocuous decision, or angling to be left alone and to his own devices. 

Whatever is going on with the Sugarplum Fairy and Lapin? Do not care for that one bit. I understand that a Warlock pact is mechanically very similar to a Paladin oath and a Celestial Warlock pact is even moreso but guess what? Still don’t trust it. I know Ruby’s Arcana check said that she’s generally a chill spirit but I still don’t trust it. And getting Wishes from your follower? Weird and suspicious. What’s your game, lady?

Emperor Gustavo apparently has a daughter who is barred by law from taking the throne when he dies. That sounds like a very strong motive for *something* at some point down the line. 

I’m a little concerned Jet is being catfished by this Avocado. First of all, not a sentence I thought I’d ever write. Second of all, I’m probably just being paranoid. But that feels like a great way to get a princess alone for kidnapping or shanking or something. 

Update: Brennan did an AMA and, regarding the previous bullet point he said, and I quote, “You are right to be concerned!” so now I’m concerned about that too! Fun!

I’m concerned about the mechanics of how a slice of cake person works. Slice implies a full cake. Where is the rest of the cake Brennan? Where is it? And, like, Brennan said on the post-show stream that we’re making the “what do they eat?” question weirder than it actually is because we’re made of some of the stuff we eat but hey Brennan? If I could pick a flesh toned and textured apple off a tree? That would be weird, OK? And I’m sorry for everyone else who had to picture that but it had to be said since Brennan is insisting on walking us down this garden path.

I’m concerned about whatever the hell is happening with Liam. Disgraced dad, mom is a shaman of the local fringe religion (Sweetening Path, like Lapin), and his brothers want him to shank the king or something? No way this ends in smiles for everyone. 

Brennan said Pyramid of Food so I’m concerned about fruit rollup mummies. 

OK but more than anything, I’m concerned about the death rules of this game. Death in D&D is cheap but, in a campaign like this, it can’t be. I’m not super well versed in GoT but it’s my understanding that resurrection in that series is possible but rare. Brennan said he specifically didn’t let Ally stock certain healing spells and that’s very telling about how things are gonna be handled. I guess we’ll see in the upcoming battle episode how that works but my general thought is, I hope everyone made interesting backup characters.  

Five More Things

So, my thoughts on the new characters. I love Ruby and Jet with my entire heart. Watching Emily and Siobhan roleplay sisters and enable each other and hype each other up is so fun--or it would be if I wasn’t low key bracing to lose one of them sooner rather than later. Zac playing against type and Murph playing to type are both fantastic. I want nothing more than for Theobald and Lapin to continue sniping at each other. I hope that’s the first PvP fight of D20. Amethar is a lot of fun but clearly in over his head and I’m interested to see where he’s pushed. Liam is literally just vibing. Hope he doesn’t have to commit regicide!     

God, the House Rocks PCs are such a disaster family. I love it. The moment when Calroy comes in and is like, “The princesses have escaped,” and Amethar breaks into a grin and is like, “Dude, that’s so dope!” I was like OH, so it’s *all* of them, huh. But, honestly, this should have been on the “Things I’m Concerned About” list because come on. They’ve not all gonna make it. And then we’re gonna have to watch the remaining family members react to that? Oh no. 

Love Ruby’s bow. I have a player in my game who also has a magic bow that produces energy arrows because, truly, who has the time to deal with the logistics of how many arrows you had left after last fight? Magic arrows. Boom, done. Next. 

Getting bagged on by your Patron for not having a spell when she’s the one who gives you your spells is so funny. Also, Mending isn’t a Warlock spell which makes it even funnier. 

**I’ve given myself a 3k word limit on all of these to try to put some boundaries on myself but, Lol, prize to the first who guesses closest to the first episode I break that rule.**