#and like i tried so hard to be like the other girls but i literally just am not lol
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best friend
you and your best friend ellie are spending the day goofing off like usual, but things take a turn when a tickle fight goes a little too far.
hello! i know it's been literal months since I've posted, and to that i have to say... woops! anyway, here's something i threw together in a moment of creative inspiration involving nerdy loser ellie! this might suck so let me know if it's not hot garbage and you want a part 2
cw// sesbian lex, top!ellie, bottom!reader, fingering, cunnilingus, so fluffy, like you might get a toothache this is so sweet, ellie being a big loser and sweetheart, reader is only described as having hair and is afab
word count- 3k
mdni i swear to god
“No, I’m telling you- a T-rex is nothing compared to a pterodactyl!” Ellie insisted, lightly nudging your leg with her sock-clad toes. You giggled at her, amused by her persistence to get her point across. But, despite her obvious knowledge in this particular field, you felt the need to be contrary. You shift back a little on her bed, leaning against the headboard.
“Mmm, I don’t know Els… a T-rex is pretty big.” You hummed, plastering a skeptical look on your face. She scoffed, offended by your audacity to doubt her.
“Well yeah, but they can’t fly! They have little nub arms, like, they couldn’t even grab you!” She curled her arms in front of her, making little swiping motions with them. “See?”
You couldn’t help but let out a bark of laughter at her- frankly- spot-on impression. You shoved her, making her topple back, almost falling off of her side of the bed entirely. She let out a little yelp, catching herself just on the edge. She spun back around with a mock look of shock.
“What? You didn’t like my impression? I’ll have you know I’ve been told no one can do a T-rex like me!” She shouted, clambering up onto her knees. Using the height advantage, she reached down to your ribcage to begin an assault of tickles. You screeched and tried to make a grab at her hands but she scrambled them around your torso, making it hard to get a grip.
“Els! Quit it!” You managed to say through your uncontrollable laughter. You thrashed, but she trapped your legs between her knees. A shit-eating grin adorned her freckled face as she continued her attack. You could feel your face getting hot from exertion but you refused to give in.
Finally, you managed to grab her wrists well enough to pry them from your body, immediately gulping down air while you knew you still could. However, Ellie quickly twisted her wrists from your grasp and grabbed onto yours instead, pinning them against the pillows next to your head. Instantly, you felt a shift in energy. Ellie’s smile dropped slightly as she stilled, eyes locked on yours. You tried to catch your breath, but it was hard with the way she was 1. still on top of you, and 2. looking at you like that.
You and Ellie had been friends for as long as you could remember. You were next door neighbors and, being two girls the same age, you quickly became each other’s besties. Even when Ellie and her dad, Joel, moved across town in middle school you stayed close. You were constantly at her house, it was practically your second home. Ellie was your favorite person in the world. She also happened to be your longtime crush. Ever since the 7th grade, when she started getting taller and grew into her features. You both knew you each like girls, but Ellie always had a crush on some other girl at your school. You didn’t want to ruin the relationship you had with your best friend by telling her you liked her when she obviously didn’t like you back. So anytime your hug lingered a little too long, or you accidentally brushed her arm or leg, you’d get tense and nervous.
You felt your face heat up more, the feeling worsening when you felt her breath fan across your face. Oh shit, was she getting closer? Your gaze flicked down to her lips, now merely centimeters from yours. When you looked back up to her eyes, she was staring at your lips. You let out a stuttering exhale, clenching your bound hands into fists.
“Els…” You breathed out, and her eyes snapped back up to yours. You pulled one of your hands free from her now slacked grip and rested it on her cheek. She whispered your name and once again briefly looked down to your lips. You slid your hand around to the back of her neck and pulled her down towards you. You watched her eyes slide shut, and then did the same right as your mouths met.
Her lips were slightly chapped, but her mouth was warm and soft against yours. You could feel her hand that still held your wrist tighten its grip, and you scraped your nails across her hairline. She pulled back for a moment to change her angle so she could kiss you deeper and you hummed, enjoying the way her mouth pressed fully against yours. She gave an experimental lick into the crease of your lips and your breath shuddered. You felt her finally release her hold on your other wrist to instead hold your waist, her pinky brushing just under your t-shirt. You reached your arm around her back, tugging her body closer to yours. You both let out a soft moan at the feeling of your bodies aligning as her hips slotted between your parted thighs.
She drew her face back and you opened your eyes. She looked down at you and lightly brushed stray hair on your temple away. She leaned back down to kiss the corner of your lips, then your cheek, then your jaw, and onward along the expanse of your neck. You tipped your chin back, encouraging her to keep going. Her plush lips left wet kisses across your throat, occasionally nipping at the skin and soothing the sting with her tongue. She sucked at a patch of skin below your ear and you bucked your hips up involuntarily. The hand that held your waist slid lower to push your shirt up slightly.
She paused her ministrations to ask, “Is this okay?” You quickly nodded and tugged her back down into a kiss, needing to feel her lips on you. You felt her hand under your shirt slowly creep up higher until it rested on your ribs, just under your breast. You slid your hand up to fully palm the back of her head and took hold of her hair. A groan slipped out of her and you squeezed her hips between your thighs at the sound.
Ellie muttered out a curse as she once again parted from you. “Can I take this off? Please?” She asked, fumbling with the hem of your shirt, desperation leaking into her tone. You nodded again, but she shook her head and leaned an inch closer. “No, need you to say it.”
You furrowed your brows and pouted, but quickly gave in. “Yes, take it off. Yours too.” You said, bunching the fabric of her own shirt in your fist. The corner of her lips turned up at your request and she leaned back down to give you a peck before sitting back on her haunches. She pulled your shirt up and you leaned forward, putting your arms above your head to make it easier for her.
As soon as your head and arms were freed from the fabric, you leaned back down and expected her to immediately remove hers. However, she sat with the shirt still in her grip, staring at your bare chest. You blushed, but you weren’t embarrassed. You could tell from the look on her face she liked what she saw. You grabbed her shirt and tugged on it. “C’mon…” You muttered, eager to get your own view. Without taking her eyes away from where they were fixated, Ellie swiftly pulled the garment up and over her head, exposing her small breasts. You mimicked her actions, staring unabashedly at her pink nipples.
Finally, she leaned back down to slide a calloused hand up your waist until she palmed your tit. She bit her lip and couldn’t seem to decide on whether to watch her own hands play with your tits, or watch your expressions. She pinched a nipple between her fingers and rolled, and your breath hitched at the feeling, biting your own lip. “God…” She muttered. She couldn’t hold herself back from kissing you again, and you held her face to keep her there. You whimpered into her mouth as she continued to toy with your nipples, and slid your hands down to do the same. You felt her breath catch when you pressed your thumbs down flat against them and flicked down. You both continued like that for a while, kissing and moaning into each other’s mouths as you played with the other’s breasts.
A particularly harsh pinch had you tossing your head back and bucking your hips up. This spurred her to reattach herself to your neck and grind down against you, earning her a high pitched noise from you. Ellie began her descent down your body, trailing her lips along your chest and the valley between your breasts. She made a quick detour to flick a nipple with her tongue, then suck it into her hot mouth. You arched your back, chasing the feeling as she continued her journey. Her hands gripped your hips as she sucked marks into your stomach. Your hands made their way into her hair, pushing it back from her face to see her better. Her fingers curled into the waistband of your sweats, just barely inching them down to plant kisses closer to your navel. You squirmed at the sensation, tightening your grip on her auburn locks.
Her fern green eyes looked up into yours, lips hovering no more than a couple inches from the skin of your hips. “You want these off?” She asked, voice raspy and dripping with lust. You whispered a soft ‘yes’, not trusting your voice enough to try for anything more. Seemingly satisfied, she nipped at your hips once more before sliding down farther to give herself room to fully remove your pants. She slowly tugged your sweatpants and underwear down at once before becoming impatient halfway through and practically ripping them the rest of the way off, slinging them off to the side.
You suddenly felt a wave of self consciousness and clamped your knees together before she could turn back to you. When she did, she frowned slightly. She planted her hands on your ankles and looked up to your face. “Baby,” She started, making your heart jump at the pet name, “lemme see.” You felt blood rush both up to your face and downward, and you wiped your sweaty palms onto the sheets below you. Her hands skated up your calves, coming to rest just below your kneecaps as she sat up higher. She pressed messy kisses to your knees, pushing her thumbs into the insides, trying to encourage you to open up. Despite your- admittedly misplaced- sudden insecurity, you slowly parted your legs, displaying your whole body for her eyes to feast on. And feast they did.
Another curse slipped from her peachy lips, gaze locked on your wet pussy. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this.” Ellie said, her eyes briefly flicking up to your face. She seemed to take herself by surprise, and a deep blush spread up from her pale chest. Her reaction was oddly adorable, and you breathed out a small giggle. That must have reassured her, as a shy smile appeared back on her face.
You reached your hand out towards her and curled your fingers in. “C’mere.” You said. Obediently, she crawled her way back up your naked body and let herself be pulled into a passionate kiss. Your fingers brushed her jaw, feeling the ends of her hair tickle your knuckles. She broke the kiss, but couldn’t stop herself from giving you one more peck, and then one to your cheek. “Will you take your pants off too? I don’t want to be the only one naked.” You requested, thumbs circling the apples of her cheeks. Her smile turned impish, and she twisted her head to press her lips to your palm.
“I can’t believe it. The past ten minutes you’ve been trying to get into my pants?” She jokingly questioned, making you laugh loudly.
“Believe it or not I have.” You answered, sliding a hand down to give her hard nipple a pinch. She gasped, holding a hand to her chest.
“Well, you could have told me!” Ellie exclaimed, then leaned her head down to litter your chest with kisses. Still softly laughing, you glided your hands up and down her back until she sat back. She twisted her body around to hook her thumbs into her pants and slide them down her legs, her underwear going along with them. As she stood back on her knees to face you again, you caught a glimpse of the patch of red hair covering her mound before she leaned back over you to continue worshipping your body with her mouth.
Ellie quickly made her way back to her previous stopping point, the stretch of skin right above your navel. She leaned back slightly and brought a hand up, gently pushing your thigh further out to give herself more room. She admired your glistening folds, and slid a single finger right down the middle, collecting your essence. You bit your lip, the anticipation driving you crazy. She finally pressed her thumb against the underside of your clit, rubbing up and down gently. The stimulation made your thigh twitch and your breath catch. Taking notice of this reaction, Ellie pressed down harder, making firm circles. This made your breathing pick up, and you reached a hand up to palm at your breast, needing something to focus on other than her unintentional teasing.
She used her index and middle finger to part your lips, spreading you out for her. Reaching her head down, she licked a fat stripe from your entrance to your clit. You breathed out her name, sweat beginning to form on your hairline. She shushed you gently in consolation just before diving back into you, tongue exploring. She suctioned your clit into her mouth while flicking it with her wet muscle, and you cried out. You were beginning to wonder if she had actually done this before and just never told you.
Your wondering was cut off when she used the two fingers she had been using to open you up to swirl broad circles over your bud and locked her gaze on you. “Can I finger you?” She asked almost too casually, too caught up in her excitement to be nervous. The eager look on her face almost made you want to deny her, but you were too needy yourself.
“Go ‘head Els.” You said. She grinned and messily smacked a kiss on your aching clit, running her fingers through more of your wetness. Slowly, she inserted her middle finger up to the knuckle, then pulled back until just the pad remained inside. The foreign feeling made you furrow your brows, both out of frustration and pleasure. She found a rhythm quickly and her eyes locked onto the sight of her lazily pumping in and out. Experimentally, she curled her finger upwards towards your front. This action had you clenching down, a whimper being pulled from your throat. Her emerald irises snapped up to your face, noticing how her actions affected you.
As she pressed a second finger in alongside the first, she bent down to keep licking you. The sensation was immediately overwhelming, and one of your hands shot down to grab onto her short hair. Once again, she curled her fingers up just as they bottomed out inside you and your hips jumped from the bed. Your brain told you the feeling was too much, but your body craved more. She found her rhythm again, slightly faster now. Her tongue laved over your bud, spreading your slick as it leaked from your hole. She hummed, and the vibrations caused your moans to increase in pitch. “Fuck! Like that- ah!” You cried out, encouraging her to continue exactly as she was. Thankfully, Ellie listened, pace never faltering as she fucked her fingers deep inside of you.
You could feel the warmth building up in your belly and knew you would cum soon. Fearing she would suddenly pull away or slow down, your grip on her hair tightened and you pulled her mouth flush to your pussy. Ellie moaned and let herself be shoved into you, opting to suck on your clit rather than lick. Your breath caught in your throat, back arching in a harsh curve as you felt your orgasm rapidly approach. Ellie dug her nails into the thigh she held as they began to shake around her head.
You let out one last pitchy whine as your high crashed over you. Your thighs squished her cheeks as they attempted to close, but she used both of her hands to push them back open, holding your hips down at the same time. Her mouth continued its assault, head moving side to side as she worked you through your orgasm. The feeling quickly became overwhelming, and your palm pushed against her forehead. “Els… too much…” You croaked out. She finally broke contact with your glossy pussy, opting instead to stare at the way your hole clenched around nothing.
“Fuck baby…” Ellie muttered, reaching up to run a thumb through your wetness, accidentally brushing your sensitive bud and making you jump. Panting, you grabbed her hand and pulled it up, wanting her to come up and kiss you. She seemed to understand this and made a slow journey back to you, leaving searing kisses across your body on the way. Once you were finally face to face you pulled her down for a proper smooch, hands cradling each side of her face. She brushed your hair back from your sweaty face as you tried to peck her on each of her freckles. She hummed a laugh and captured your lips in another soft kiss before pulling back and resting her head beside yours, nose nuzzling into your pulse point. You let out a heavy sigh, letting the aftershocks wrack through you as you rubbed her back.
“I love you.” She said, pressing her lips to your earlobe.
You smiled and tugged her hair to look her in the eyes. “I love you too.” You responded, thumbing her pouty bottom lip. She kissed your thumb, and held your face in one of her hands.
Her breath shuddered as your hand slithered down her torso, fingertips playing with the curly hair just above her pussy. “Your turn?”
#the last of us#the last of us part 2#tlou2#ellie williams#ellie tlou#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams smut
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Hiii :D would u be willing to make a 2012 leo x fem reader where reader is very dense to leo's obvious crush on her? And everyone else knows it and tries to be his wingman but reader just doesn't get it until he spells it out for her? Ofc if u don't want to you can ignore! I love your work xoxo 💕
We Just Have To Set The Mood (Fluff)
2012!Leonardo x reader
A/N: Finally got around to do this one! I decided to have a little fun and write it from the other’s perspective, just to try something a little different. I had a hard time doing it so Leo actually spelled it out to the reader, so I decided to focus on the wingman aspect of your request. I started to get a little bit of a writer's block towards the end, but I really wanted to get this finished for you💙 Hope you’ll enjoy anyway💙
Warnings: None💙
“Is she blind or something?”, Raph whispered in utter disbelief, watching you and Leo on the couch from his and Donnie’s hiding spot behind a pillar, their eyes following the movements of the two of you as you casually talked. Well, you at least seemed casual. Leo on the other hand looked like a love lost puppy, with practically bright pink hearts for eyes and a dreamy smile smeared over his face, as he listened to you talk. “I mean, look at him. He follows her around like a lost puppy! How has she not noticed?!”
“It’s (Y/N) we’re talking about, Raph”, Donnie reminded his brother. “This is the same girl that literally has been oblivious to Leo’s crush for years now. Have you forgotten the time Leo thought he had asked her out on a date, but then she brought April along, thinking it was a casual get together?”
“Don’t remind me”, Raph mumbled. “He was a sighing mess for two weeks, and he really wanted me to ask about it”.
“Did you ask him about it?”, Donnie questioned, raising a brow muscle.
“Of course not”, Raph said, neither he nor Donnie noticing the orange clad bundle of joy, silently making his way to his brothers from behind. “If I ask about it once, he will expect me to ask about it again another day”.
“What are we talking about?”, Mikey’s voice suddenly sounded behind the two brothers, causing them to do a little jump in surprise. So much for being a ninja, and you can’t even hear your little brother casually walking up behind you.
“Leo and (Y/N)”, Donnie said, sparing Raph from the madness. “They are talking, but (Y/N) is still as oblivious as always”.
“You’re joking”, Mikey said in disbelief, peeking out from his brothers’ hiding spot, to see the scene unfolding on the couch. He could practically hear Leo’s heart beat in his chest as you spoke, his hands fiddling with themselves in an effort to keep himself calm. Damn, he was struck hard.
“How long have they been sitting there?”, Mikey asked.
“An hour or two”, Raph answered. “And nothing has happened, other than Leo looking like an absolute fool”.
“We have to do something”, Mikey said, suddenly sounding like a man on a mission, making Raph’s eyes widen in fear for what his little brother may have had in mind. Donnie on the other hand just seemed sceptical.
“There’s not much we can do”, Donnie said, placing his hands on his hips. “Leo has specifically asked us not to let (Y/N) know, and so far he doesn’t seem like he’s ready to tell her”.
“Nobody has to tell anybody anything”, Mikey smiled, already having an idea in mind. “We just have to set the mood”.
“And how are we supposed to do that?”, Raph asked, crossing his arms, seeming not the least bit convinced by Mikey’s words. “We live in a sewer, for crying out loud”.
With a smile Mikey turned to his brother in red, before wiggling his brow muscles. “Where there’s a will, there’s a way”, was all he said, before slipping out of his brothers’ hiding spot, making his way across the room, heading straight for the kitchen.
Watching in confusion and curiosity, Donnie and Raph’s eyes followed Mikey as he made his way through the living area, past you and Leo. You, only seeming lightly aware of Mikey’s presence in the room, and Leo focused on nothing else but you.
It didn’t take long before Mikey came back from the kitchen, with a pack of chocolate in his hand. With a small skip in his step, Mikey made his way towards the couch, before taking a seat next to Leo on the opposite side of you, causing the older turtle to shoot him an annoyed look. The last thing Leo wanted right now, was for his brothers to ruin what small moments he got to spend alone with you.
“So”, Mikey said, opening the pack of chocolate in his hands. “How are you two doing today?” Out of the corner of his eye, Mikey could see both Raph and Donnie facepalm. But they did not know what Mikey had planned, and therefore Mikey was comfortable in his actions.
“We’re good, Mikey”, you smiled, not noticing the daggers Leo was staring at his youngest brother. “What about you?”
“Oh, I’m good”, Mikey smiled, holding up the chocolate. “Just about to enjoy myself a treat”.
“Mikey”, Leo suddenly said, almost in a warning tone, trying to find a reason to get Mikey away from the main living area, so he could be alone with you again. “Didn’t you have that thing to do in your room?”
“What thing?”, Mikey asked, acting like he had no clue what Leo was talking about. But he knew exactly what Leo was trying to do.
“That thing you talked about earlier today”, Leo said, giving his brother a warning look.
“Oh!”, Mikey suddenly exclaimed, acting like Leo had reminded him of something. “You’re right! That thing!”
Mikey quickly got up from the couch, before springing towards his room, and the pillar Raph and Donnie still stood hiding behind. You and Leo giggled at each other, when you saw that Mikey had left his chocolate behind, however neither of you seemed to notice how the orange clad turtle still had the TV remote in his hand as he left.
“How is that going to set the mood?”, Raph whispered in a harsh voice, wondering if Mikey had lost his mind.
“Have faith in me brotha”, Mikey said, dingling the TV remote in front of his face. “I know what I’m doing”.
Frowning with confusion, Donnie and Raph watched as Mikey made his way over to the light switch, before turning it off. That caused a small startled sound from you, followed by small laughs from both you and Leo, saying something along the lines of it probably just behind his brothers pulling a prank of sorts. Much to both Raph and Donnie’s surprise, Leo suddenly seemed much less nervous, his laugh actually sounding somewhat confident.
With a big smile plastered over his face, Mikey made his way back to the pillar, giving his brothers a wink. “Now watch this”. With the TV remote in hand, Mikey pressed the on button, then sudden light from the TV filled you and Leo’s field of view, causing the two of you to jump in surprise, followed by the two of you laughing once more from your sudden shock.
“Now”, Mikey said, crossing his arms. “We just let the magic play out”.
“What magic?”, Raph asked, still not convinced.
“I think he’s talking about that magic”, Donnie said, pointing to you and Leo who had scooted closer to each other, so you had an easier time sharing the chocolate.
“I don’t believe it”, Raph mumbled, mouth open in disbelief, as you suddenly, for once looked at Leo with a hint of what he had been looking at you with.
“What is playing anyway?”, Donnie asked, honestly impressed with what he saw.
“Just that romantic series everyone is talking about”, Mikey said. “There’s a marathon tonight, so those two will have plenty of time to figure things out”.
“B- but”, Raph stammered, still not truly able to believe what was going on. “How did you know it would work? How did you know that was playing tonight?”
Mikey shrugged his shoulders with a small smile. “I got my secrets”.
“Secrets my shell”, Raph snarred. “How did you know?”
“Guys…”, Donnie said, trying to get his brothers’ attention so they could see how the scene on the couch was evolving.
“I can’t tell you all of my secrets”, Mikey said with a shrug, enjoying how it seemed to annoy Raph.
“You little-”.
“Guys!”, Donnie whispered more harshly, finally gaining the arguing turtles attention. “Look!”, he said, pointing towards you and Leo, who now sat on the couch with your arms loosely draped around each other, and your lips connected in a soft and sweet kiss.
Raph blinked at the sight, before turning to look at Mikey, who stood with a big smile. “I told you we just had to set the mood”.
#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt x reader#tmnt 2012#tmnt 2012 x reader#tmnt 2012 leo x reader#tmnt 2012 leonardo x reader#tmnt leo x reader#tmnt leonardo x reader#tmnt leonardo#tmnt leo#tmnt 2012 leo#tmnt 2012 leonardo#tmnt raphael#tmnt donatello#tmnt michelangelo#tmnt raph#tmnt donnie#tmnt mikey
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(more info under the cut....)
HER CANINE TEETH IN THE SIDE OF MY NECK (werewolf!vi x vampire slayer!reader)
slightly canon-divergent....basically set during pit fighter!vi arc except in this world we've got vampires!! and werewolves!!!!
so reader is also a pit fighter -- they literally meet for the first time when they're competing underground. the next morning vi wakes up with a wicked hangover in some stranger's apartment and that stranger is you! and your dog! vi doesn't realize this yet but you saved her drunk ass from a vampire anyways, you invite vi to train with you and some other girls and offer to patch her up after fights. she's reluctant but you're persistent ("why're you being nice to me. are you some kind of guardian angel?" "nah. i just have a thing for strays. now hold still unless you want to bleed to death.") so little by little, vi moves away from the whole lone wolf thing; she's still very scared to let people in after what happened with caitlyn, but you're a much needed bit of levity and light in this world of darkness and monsters ("whoever wins the most fights tonight picks up the tab for the bar." "you're on, killer." *later that night* "guess i'll be picking up the tab," you smile, your lip splitting open even more. "i'll still take care of it, angel. lemme take care of you first.") vi maybe has a crush on you that she tries very hard to keep secret bc of who she is.....while you're also head over heels for her and trying to keep the whole vampire slayer thing under wraps....perhaps unsuccessfully, but i don't want to spoil it hehe.
LIKE SOME MISPLACED JOAN OF ARC (spiderverse au)
vi is spider-gwen spider-woman! she's in college, plays drums in a band, has an internship at some lab and spends a lot of her time saving the city but there's the lingering guilt that she couldn't save you (canon event: losing their first love). one day she's fighting some villain and....a portal opens? and she's transported into what seems to be another universe?? she does to her apartment and when she knocks on the door, her heart almost stops -- because you're the one who opens it. turns out in this universe, you're spider-woman, dealing with some demons of your own (two canon events rolled into one: losing their first love and not being able to save the life of a police captain....and your vi was an enforcer). basically you have to work together to get vi back home and fix the multiverse and also keep doing spider-person stuff bc it's new york and the crime never stops (you both admit *to yourselves* that it's nice to have someone to share the responsibility....i have this idea and it's a scene that i wrote in another fic basically vi is taking a shower in your bathroom and you go in to drop off a towel or something but oh no! your roommate needs something and since vi is dead in your universe you can't have anyone see her so you have to hide in the shower with vi and it's....obvi very intimate....like vi needs your help washing her hair or something bc she's got this terrible bruise from being thrown around by doc ock and you're maybe a bit too eager help) anyways you fall for each other through all this chaos even though you both really really don't wanna go through losing the other and it seems like it's inevitable one way or another. but, fuck the universe, right?
#on this episode of saf can't decide....#tbh im leaning more towards spiderverse BUT i've been wanting to do something more....like buffy the vampire slayer vibes#so im curious which one y'all prefer :))#vi x reader#vi smut#vi fanfic#vi#vi arcane x reader#vi arcane#vi angst#saf speaks
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bad boy! matt and librarian! reader 𝜗𝜚
part one ⭑ pushy
description: you meet matt while working at your job at the public library and he can’t help but try and make a move on you.
w/c: 2526
warnings: mentions of weed, cussing, nothing too crazy (yet)
mood board found here!
he probably shouldn’t be staring as long as he has been, but he just couldn’t help it. you were so fucking pretty he literally couldn’t take his eyes off you. the way your hair flows with one simple movement, the twinkle in your eye when you’re helping patrons, the smile on your face when you’re giving your best customer service. god, your personality seemed absolutely addicting. you were also really fucking pretty. maybe that’s why he was standing here like a fucking stalker, but he just couldn’t help it. he couldn’t take his eyes off you.
he tried to look busy, his fingers drumming along the spines of the books, but he hadn’t read a book since high school and that wasn’t by choice. it was because from where he was standing, he had a great view of you sitting at the service desk, a strand of your hair falling from your high ponytail.
why was he here anyway? oh yeah, that’s right. he’s been waiting 45 minutes for his weed guy to fucking show up, but so far the guy was late, really late. it wasn’t like him to be late, but matt got tired of waiting around and decided to try and occupy his time somehow. he was getting restless waiting in his car and sitting in the parking lot of the library was making him feel like an actual stalker. at least he’d feel like one looking at a pretty librarian like you in the cozy, quiet building.
it’s not that he’s nervous to talk to you. he had decent luck with woman. he’d either take them home, or hook up with one at the parties he’d throw at his house. none of those girls mattered though. he didn’t care for relationships at all. love and all that cheesy bullshit was not something matt cared for. it’s not that he didn’t have time for it; he sure did. he just didn’t really believe in falling in love and the romantic shit. maybe it’s because nobody had been worth his time.
once an elderly woman walked away from the desk and you were available again, he made his way over to the service desk. you were typing something onto your computer, not really paying attention to matt standing in front of you until he cleared his throat to get your attention.
your eyes immediately shot up at him and your face turned apologetic. “i’m so sorry, sir. i was caught up in something. how can i help you?”
god, you were even prettier up close. your cheeks were rosy pink with the lightest makeup applied to your face. your hair was in a tight ponytail with the strands falling onto the sides of your face. you wore a pretty floral dress with a jean jacket, your glasses perched onto your nose. matt had your full attention now and matt had completely forgot what excuse he was going to use to come up here and ask you about.
he was probably lost in a trance at your beauty and staring a little too hard at you and checking you out because she asked again. “sir? can i help you?”
matt wasn’t one to get embarrassed or shy. hell, he made others feel that way. luckily, you seemed oblivious to him checking you out. you had a busy day today, despite the weather being quite shitty outside. every time the weather is awful, you assume people will stay home and not come in, but you were wrong every single time. it was always the complete opposite. luckily, things seemed to die down now.
“oh, yeah. sorry. uh, hey, do you guys have wifi here?” fuck, what a stupid ass question. he ran his fingers through his tousled brunette locks, his eyes staying locked onto yours the whole time.
luckily, you didn’t seem bothered by the question. you were used to people asking you questions that were common sense like ‘what are your hours?’ and ‘do you have books here?’ so the question didn’t annoy you at all. “of course we do. if you pull up your phone, you’ll be able to find our wifi in the settings. no password needed.”
matt nodded his head, understanding your words fully. he licked over his lips before pulling out his phone, which had no notifications from his weed guy. he opened up his settings, noticing there were two network names. one was public, and the other needed a password. he furrowed his eyebrow in confusion and pointed his phone at you. “what’s this about? why do you staff workers get your own wifi? better wifi for the privileged or some shit?”
you laughed at his comment and immediately shook your head. you had to admit, the boy in front of you was very attractive. he wore all black, baggy jeans, a chain around his neck and earrings dangling from his ears. he had a mysterious aura about him that made you slightly intrigued. of course you’d keep it professional. you loved your job and were going to school for library science. everyone at the library were like family and you couldn’t be more proud of your job and the work you’ve done there. also, nobody really comes into the library but the elderly, and children with their parents for story times and fun events.
“no, sir. it’s just easier and more convenient for us staff workers to work on the staff only wifi instead. each individual wifi should work the same.” your cheeks were slightly flushed the more you looked at him. he was really fucking attractive and you couldn’t help but check him out. you’ve only had one boyfriend back in high school, but he cheated on you and you’ve learned to guard your heart since then. it’s been a couple years though and your friends always tried to set you up on dates, but you didn’t care enough for any of them. they weren’t worth your time.
he let out a scoff, shaking his head in disbelief. “that’s not really fair. this wifi is shit.” his phone was not loading properly as he tried to connect to it. maybe his phone was shit, but this was the only excuse he could think of to talk to the pretty girl. he leaned forward with both of his palms rested onto the service desk, his eyes solely focused on you. “ what’s a guy like me gotta do to get on the better working wifi, huh?”
you suddenly felt nervous as he leaned in closer, placing the loose strands of hair over your ear. you placed your glasses down next to you, since you only wear them to read anyway. you couldn’t help but stare at him more intently, feeling your cheeks heat up as his body was leaned in more towards you. you’ve never seen this guy before in the 5 years that you’ve worked there. where did he even come?
“well, i wouldn’t be able to do that.” your cheeks flushed even more. you hated telling him no, but the wifi network was staff only and you always made sure to imply by the rules. “sometimes the signal is a little spotty on the public wifi depending on how much its being used.”
truth is, you didn’t know much about wifi or technology in general besides what you were taught at your job. he didn’t seem to buy anything you were saying. he kept his palms firmly on the desk, titling his head slightly to get a better look at you. “i think you would be able to. you’re just afraid to. am i right?”
he flashed you a small smirk, not being able to take his eyes off you. he could sense you were slightly flustered the way your facial expressions changed. you bit onto your bottom lip, not being able to take your eyes away from him. his blue eyes gazed into yours and you felt your breath hitch in your throat. fuck, he was so pretty. you could tell he was the kind of person who didn’t take no for an answer.
“i’m not afraid. it’s just my job.” you spoke very professional, but he could tell you were getting slightly agitated and didn’t want to have to say no to him.
he wouldn’t stop, leaning in closer now, his palms still pressed against the desk and his eyes locked onto yours. “what if i give you something in return?”
you furrowed your eyebrow up at him in confusion, trying your best to keep your cool. sure, this boy was fucking attractive and intriguing, but this was your job. you tried to be professional, but he was making it hard. “what could you possibly give me?”
he let out a soft chuckle, a sly smirk appearing onto his lips. “how about i give you my number? and if that’s not enough, you can text me when you get off work and we can discuss it further.”
matt didn’t even care about the fucking wifi. he just wanted to show off his charm and possibly get to know the pretty librarian. he was pretty used to getting his way and damn he wanted his way with you.
you let out a soft sigh, but eventually give in. you really didn’t want to keep this up and he probably wouldn’t let you say no anyway. “fine.” you said with another sigh leaving your lips.”but only to get you off my back. not because i want your number.”
you look up at matt who’s grinning ear to ear, getting his way once again. “you say that now, just wait, pretty girl. you’ll be really fucking glad you had this conversation with me today to get my number in the end.” his palms still rested onto the desk, now flashing you a sly smirk. “i promise.”
“don’t make promises you can’t keep.” you said dryly, pulling out a small piece of paper and pen off the desk and scribbling down the wifi password to him. before you hand it to him, you look around the area to make sure nobody has spotted your interaction with him. you didn’t wanna get in trouble. luckily, there was nobody around, thank goodness. you had to admit, this entire interaction excited you, but you had your walls up and made sure not to show that you were easy to get. you were strong and smart. you knew not to mess with bad boys and this boy? you could tell he was trouble.
you slid the piece of paper to him and he glances down at it for a second before slipping it in his pocket. he didn’t seem that interested in the piece of paper with the wifi password on it. that’s not even what he cared about. he just wanted to get to know you.
you hand him another piece of paper and he takes it from you, your hands brushing against each other for a moment which causes a spark of electricity to run throughout your veins. you let out a soft gasp, looking up at him immediately to see if he noticed the same sensation. he did feel it, his smirk widening as he takes the piece of paper and pen. he leans down to scribble his name and phone number on the piece of paper before handing it back to you.
he was smirking the entire time, seeming very pleased at the fact that he gave you his phone number. your heart was beating out of your chest as you grab the piece of paper from him and this time, you made sure not to have any contact with his hand. last thing you want is to have this guy invade your brain and make you excited to talk to him or maybe see him again.
you look down at the piece of paper that he handed you, seeing that his name is “matt” and his phone number underneath it. “thanks, i guess? if i even decide to text you.” you flashed him an innocent smile, placing the piece of paper close next to you.
“oh you will. that’s a promise.” he pulled his hands away from the desk, now placing them in his hoodie pockets.
“don’t make any promises you can’t keep, matt.” you said his name out loud for the first time, now knowing it and being able to match a name to a face.
he could see your name on your lanyard that you wear to work. he stared at it for a moment which made your cheeks feel warm knowing in order to look at the lanyard, he would have to look at your chest. his eyes averted from your chest and back up into your eyes, a gleam of excitement passing through his expressions. “i look forward to getting to know you, pretty librarian.”
even though he knew your name, he still called you that nickname that made your cheeks flush even more. you silently wished in your head that you had wore makeup today so that it would cover some of the warmth on your cheeks, but it was no use. he could tell you were affected by him and he was loving every single second of it.
before you could reply back to him, your eye caught the attention of another patron behind him who was waiting to be helped. he noticed your eyes had averted behind him and he turned around to see that you two weren’t alone anymore. at that same moment, his phone buzzed, signaling his weed guy was finally there and asking where the hell he was.
“text me later, pretty.” he flashed you a playful wink before giving you one more glance and turning on his heel to walk away from the desk.
this entire interaction left you warm, confused, and a little intrigued. the piece of paper already felt like it was burning a hole in your pocket, but you couldn’t let it. you were strong. there was no way you’d be able to fall for a bad boy, or anyone for that matter.
you tried to pay attention the rest of your shift, but you couldn’t. all you could think about was matt and how he leaned against the desk with his pretty blue eyes on you, practically persuading you to give him your number. he consumed your brain, making you lose focus and stutter on your words to patrons that came through. should you text him? or was it even worth the risk? when you had a moment alone without helping anyone, your fingers ghosted over the piece of paper. would you even see him again?
matt walked outside to meet his weed guy, feeling like he was floating on air. success: he had given the pretty librarian his phone number. now all he needed was for her to text him.
he was intrigued by you, wanting to continue the conversation and get to know you. even if you were rough around the edges and a little sassy, he didn’t care.
you were special. he could tell and he would make damn sure he didn’t fuck it up.
taglist-
@sturnshood @strangelife122 @jessie-essie @giveheavensomehell @rina3476 @chrissturnioloslvt @sturnslutz @forgottxen @matthewsturnsgf @christmastreecake @rinahasspots @222wall876 @chris-hallelujah @izzylovesmatt @strniloslvts @oopsiedaisydeer
a/n- thank you so much for reading! i had fun writing this and will be continuing it when i have the time and when the ideas come to me. if you have any ideas, wanna talk about bad boy! matt x librarian! reader, or just wanna talk in general, don’t hesitate to send me a message!
- nessa ღ
#sturniolo triplets#sturniolos#sturniolo#sturniolotriplets#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo fic#matt sturniolo au#matt x you#matt x reader#matt sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplets fic#sturniolo triplets au#bad boy! matt#librarian! reader#blushsturnsღ
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omg how was the show?? :D
Absolutely awesome. Shame I only saw it once since I can't see it on the 7th 😓 Guess I'll have to cherish that one time forever!
This ask is the perfect excuse for me to talk about the show 😈 Thank you
Now, time for the little things during the show that I made myself remember (and might've actually forgotten some) Spoilers for the musical below, I guess?
-The notebook being thrown into the water at the start, I. did not know there was water there.
-The lights turning off during fights in general was just spectacular to see, the noise of it shutting off as it did made it all the better.
-Darrel going to Ponyboy first after he's jumped & the rumble. Same as the book but sweet non the less.
-Soda always trying to get Darrel away whenever he's about to argue with Pony.
-Two-bit got a hubcap from the Socs, knew this but still funny to see.
-Ace saying "Yeah I like girls" after Soda says "You'd know huh Ace?" or something along those lines in GGAH. I was shaking when I heard that
-Soda didn't catch the hair grease when it was thrown at him, had another one in his back pocket 😭
-Ponyboy mentioning Sodapop saying Sandy's name in his sleep sometimes, awkward conversation to have..
-Johnny just plopping right into the tire when Dallas came to check on him as his parents fought, and then swatting him away when Dallas tried to go in his house, and the silence that came after. Ouch.
-Loved the dances during Friday at the drive in!
-PONY TRYING TO LOOK COOL BEFORE SITTING NEXT TO CHERRY IN THE DRIVE IN, I wasn't looking at them when they were hyping each other to get up at the start, only caught the last glimpse but then Pony popped up his collar, Johnny copying 😭 and then smoothing down his hair and sitting "all cool" cracked me up. Little losers
-Bob yelling(? forgot) at Cherry to get in the car 😬 Love her for standing her ground but Golly
-I was singing along to Runs in the Family Reprise in my head the entire time, also pretty sure someone gasped behind me when Ponyboy gets slapped
-Vocals in Great expectations, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
-Socs literally lifting Ponyboy upside down to dunk him in the water?? Jesus
-Darrels no snitch
-No one laughing when Johnny wipes the blood on the switch off on his jeans, I felt like that was laugh worthy..
-Two-bit gettin jumped ☹️
-Loved the stage lighting for the sunrise!!!??
-Okay I knew that Dallas would say Pony looked like Burt Lancaster as well but the entire theatre laughing got me to laugh too
-The shadows of them helping the kids during Hoods Turned Heroes- I did not know that'd happen at all!
-The rumble sequence. Definitely matches up to the hype I've heard about it
-Darrel absolutely in awe while reading the newspaper about them being heroes..
-The Socs passing around a flask, holding it up to the sky before taking a gulp and pouring the rest into the fountain for Bob..
-THE ENTIRE GANG being there when Johnny dies?? I DID know this but damn. Still hurt.
-Pony thinking Dallas was just going to get on the train to run away again.. 🙁
-Darrel putting baloney in the food.. yikes! Yeah he didn't know, still. Damn the small details.
-Cherry volunteering at the hospital, that's how she got Johnny's stuff. I knew she was one to bring it but didn't think about it too hard, but if I did I'd probably be confused as hell
-Ponyboy dropping the letter to smell Johnny’s clothes just. Ripped me apart, because I carry sm memories to smells myself (autism be damned?)
-Darrel SOBBING when Ponyboy came to the table to eat at the very end. I did not expect that at all and felt myself tear up a bit (I didn't cry at all before that). He turned right to my section when he was trying to hide his sobs so I got a clear view of him trying to bottle it back up :(
-Loved the Gold lighting at the very end. Beautiful show overall!! Shame I can't see it again 💔
#the outsiders#the outsiders broadway#the outsiders musical#darry curtis#ponyboy curtis#darrel curtis#sodapop curtis#ace the outsiders#cherry valance#dallas winston#johnny cade#two bit mathews#bob sheldon
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Hot & Cold - Chapter 1
(Dr. Phosphorus x fem!reader)
Synopsis: Since there’s not enough alien criminals, you got stuck in the monster section of Belle Reve. And of course Waller put you on Task Force M. To make matters even worse, the guy who landed you in prison in the first place is right there, never leaving you alone. But maybe, he can compensate you in more way than one…
No content warnings needed for this chapter (that I can think of). No Y/N usage
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Being imprisoned sucked. Being imprisoned in Belle Reve sucked more. Being imprisoned in the monster section sucked the most.
You’d had a good five years to figure out how to, well, not thrive, but do a bit more than just survive. Fight when someone else instigates - not enough to get you thrown into isolation, but enough to scare off everyone else for awhile. Don’t piss of the guards, but also don’t be a suck up, they hate that even more. Don’t make friends because they’ll either die, get transferred, or turn on you. There was only one thing you hadn’t figured out yet. Well, two if you count figuring out how to escape. When Waller pulled you for a super secret special mission, your first thought was that maybe you could figure out at least one of your two remaining problems.
The sun bore down on the six of you as Waller and Flag carted you into a military ship. The feeling of its warmth was one you hadn’t felt in a long time, and it was gone too soon. As you got wedged between two other freaks, you finally looked to see who else was pulled for the super special top secret mission. On you left was Weasel, some freaky rodent you didn’t really know. On the other side was The Bride; you’d never met her before but you figured she was The Bride since she looked like she would be Frankenstein’s bride. Across from her was a robot and across from Weasel was some fish girl. The only person you knew was sitting right across from you. As much as you tried not to, his green glowing skeleton was hard not to look at, and the two of you locked eyes. Or, at least, it felt like you did.
“Wow. After all these years, and we’re finally reunited on a mission to save a princess. Who would’ve thought?” Dr. Phosphorus said, in a tone that you knew meant he was grinning. You scoffed. “I would’ve thought we’d be reunited by you breaking me out of that hellhole.”
“You two… know each other?” the fish girl asked.
“No.” you said firmly, hoping to put an end to the conversation.
Truthfully, you had met before, back in Gotham. You ran into each other while trying to rob the same bank. He threatened to burn your “pretty little face” off, you threatened to break all his bones and leave him an immovable fire. Not exactly love at first sight.
“She just doesn’t want to admit she’s totally in love with me,” he whispered to the girl.
“Don’t think my threat to break your bony ass doesn’t still stand.” Despite your threat, you could still feel him grinning at you. You couldn’t tell if it was his gaze or his literal flames that were heating you up.
When you finally arrived at the castle, breaking free from being squished up against your fellow monsters felt almost as good as being let out of isolation. The castle looming in front of you was shockingly beautiful. You silently cursed yourself for not trying to take it over while you were free.
As the seven of you were escorted inside, Phosphorus slowly drifted over to walk next to you. It took every fiber of your being not to look at him. But being so close to him, you had to admit his warmth felt nice.
Then at dinner, he of course was quick to make sure he sat next to you. When you and the Bride rolled your eyes and his obviousness, he tried to casually explain it away by saying “Us Gotham guys gotta stick together, right?”, but his nervous chuckle gave him away. Soon enough, dinner was served, distracting everyone. It’d been far too long since you’d had real, good food, and just like the others, you scarfed it down. When you finally paused and looked up, you noticed the princess staring at you.
“Forgive me, I do not mean to stare. I was just… I mean no offense, but I thought America had forbidden human criminals from missions such as this one?” Princess Illana asked.
The table went silent, except for Weasel’s aggressive eating noises.
You tried to smile. “I know I look like one, but I’m not human.” It was hard to hold her gaze; you just didn’t have it in you to explain further. She muttered a simple “Oh”, and the previous chatter and eating resumed shortly. Except for you, your appetite was gone.
“You ok?” Phosphorus whispered, noticing you pushing your food around with your fork.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” You still couldn’t look at him, but this time it wasn’t because you didn’t want to.
“I know you’re fine,” he teased.
“Shut it,” you snapped before he could ask if you were ok again.
For most of your life, no one knew you weren’t human. You were great at hiding your powers. The only reason the whole world knew you were an alien was because your stupid defense attorney thought that being an alien somehow made you exempt from the law and used it at trial. As you sat there, all you could hear was the gasps of the courtroom when he revealed your secret, and all you could feel was rage spreading throughout your body. Then you remembered how pitifully he cried when you killed him, and that calmed you down enough.
After dinner, everyone poured out into the courtyard, and you reveled in the bright warm sun. The feeling of its heat on your skin was practically euphoric. You laid down on the soft grass, shamelessly sunbathing.
“Trying to get a tan on?”
Opening one eye, you saw Phosphorus standing over you.
Ugh, why can’t he just leave me alone?
“You’re blocking my sunlight.”
Carefully, he laid down next to you, his fingertips dangerously close to yours.
“I get it, you wanna have something to show off to the loser inmates who didn’t get picked when we get back.”
You groaned. “You know nothing.”
“Mmm, maybe. But I want to know everything,” the teasing tone in his voice was gone, replaced with a low, almost seductive tone.
You thanked God you could blame your blushing cheeks on the sun.
“Oh, can it, skelly.”
He chuckled, but let it drop. The two of you laid there together in silence until the sun started to go down. At least your bedroom was sure to be warmer than your prison cell.
#dr. phosphorus#creature commandos#dr. phosphorus x reader#x reader creature commandos#dr. phosphorus fanfic
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said to my counsellor that i wasnt built for friendship because everyone always eventually just. stops speaking to me and she went “ok why do you think that is?” and then when i finished my dumb sad list she went “ok so maybe you aren’t good at friendship” and i. have never regretted spending £50 more in my life lol
#A RANT IN THE TAGS MY GOD I DIDNT EVEN REALISE I AM WRITING THIS WARNING RETROSPECTIVELY#£50 to feel like never trying to speak to anyone again or forge any connections THANKS RUTH#Ruth remember when I said that every friendship I’ve had I’ve never truly known if it’s a friendship or if it’s one sided#remember when I told you that my friend groups always had people who had a favourite and I was never the favourite#remember when I told you that several friend groups have disbanded but not really they actually just made new spaces without me?#remember that? remember my trauma? remember?#because I DO!!!#I was not born to have friends I don’t think#I can’t even make friends with other autistic people or other weird people or other queer people#I don’t even think I could make friends with a clone of myself#this is so guy wrenchingly isolating lol#like girl what do you want from me? keep everyone at arms length like I used to?#try not to let myself get attached to people in case they decide they don’t want to be close to me anymore?#please it is not great advice Ruth#THE WORAT PART is that I literally was like ‘I don’t message too much because I’m overbearing’#and she asked where the proof was#and all I had was the complete dissolving of any relationship where I tried or tried too hard#so now I’m left in this confusing space of do I message too much or not enough because I have no happy medium#and she knows SHE KNOWS I also have energy issues and executive dysfunction stuff going on#and I know she is just trying to help and get me to think about this stuff#but it was just not the time lmao#finnie shouts into the void
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i think growing up kind of lonely does a number on you because i was never in a friend group, only ever on the periphery of many, a lot of my friendships were very transient (except the two people ive been friends with for 10+ years), i was never in any group chat (and i was always very aware that my friends were in a gc together, i just never got added), i was often left out of things, and so i just tended to drift away from people. and then i wonder if im always just going to be a little bit alone, a little bit outside of everything forever. yes i have friends but im none of my friends' closest friend.
#sometimes i wonder if i am actually someone who likes spending time with myself#or if thats just like. a leftover coping mechanism from hs#and like i tried so hard to be like the other girls but i literally just am not lol#i was gay but didnt know it and probably autistic#im also very hesistant about calling someone my friend because im like. are we friends or are you going to start talking to me#less and less frequently as your tolerance of me wanes?#i still find myself very surprised when people actively seek my company
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the only thing i hate more than ppl who lie is ppl who lie in a way that forces you to go along with it like ohhhmy fucking god do whatever the fuck you want if it's only yourself you're embarrassing but why would you bring ME into this. lord
#just tell the fucking truth!!!!! it's always so fucking obvious too like omg 😭😭 shutthe fuck up#anyway guess who has to make like 5 extra trips across budapest coz their father is insane (me)#no reason!!! no reason whatsoever!!!!! literally could've just told the truth!!!!!!#him and another man both expect me to lie to a bunch of people but they're also#lying to EACH OTHER and i know they're lying and they know i know but they dont know the other's lying#AND FOR FUCKING WHAT!!! YOU COULD JUST BE HONEST. IT'S SO EASY.#i literally dont give a shit if it's just his lies he's a /redacted/ it's literally his job to lie. BUT LEAVE ME OUTTT OMGGG fuck#also they didnt explain to me that I'd have to lie and then got mad at me for not lying. LIKE GIRL . WHAT ♥#ended up calling other guy's secretary coz i literally had noone else to talk to abt it and i was abt to have like a#full nervous breakdown in a public square. poor woman#she was very nice tho. thankfully coz that would've been the last straw for real#barking#also i tried soooo hard to get clear instructions from either of them and neither of them told me Anything#LIKE BRO IM GONNA BLOW UP. TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT I NEED TO DO. STEP BY STEP
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merry christmas btw i kinda forgot to say it ere at all oopsies >_< i hope you all had/have a wonderful holiday season or week or day or month regardless of your religion and if you celebrate christmas !!!!!
i got 'the end of everything' by katie mack for xmas (i begged my parents lol) bcs i finally saw it in a bookstore after months of looking for it that i just Fell to the ground ..... i love astrophysics i love space i love science. i also love u all
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#:3 :3 :3 meow#urgh. tired! i wish to ignore my responsibilities but i should not cannot#i actually got genshin again yesterday which sounds unreal. i just want pretty blonde girl navia LMFAOOO#but also i've actually been making progress w quests and shit so yay ^_^ also playing again bcs i lov my friends. nini u will not see this#but ily. also u berry even tho we are on wholly different servers bcs i'm on na haha despite the fact i am literally asian & in asia but ok#i miss ffxiv ... :(( i meant to make my theme vincent valentine and reference hit song valentine by hit band mäneskin#but i was like i do not think i can live long w this. and then thought hard. and then. ryne/gaia... my darlings <3#also idk if i've said but i'm finally. heading and delving more into dnd finally !! tis meant to be lmfao i love my friends wow#and also my dad had his own dnd set back in the day he never used unfortunately and doesnt hav anymore but Yes <333#bg3 ocs are tasty! you have apollo erebus and thanatos there is an obvious theme in names going on!#funny there is one silly bard (my guy ever. obviously) and then the other two are durges on opposite ends#pretty boy draconic sorcerer who tries to be good but honestly he's romancing astarion too so he's kinda Yeah#and then you have than who is. what a pretty enby he/she ladyman! romancing minthara ofc <3 they are my evil girlie#evil girlies more like. Two of them yay!!! w opposite color schemes (quite intentional but also i Just Love Red)#haven't watched pjotvseries bcs i will cry throughout the whole thing (probably not an exaggeration) so i am obviously not ready#yeah. ^_^ <3
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these things are always happening to the ones i like :////////
anyways the lighting in this dungeon is so nice
didn't get any good pics bc i was too busy dungeoning but so pretty...best dungeon music so far goes to snowcloak though btw
#ffxivposting#i knew it was coming bc i tried to use the google search bar as a spellcheck for his name (LOL) like a DUMBASS because in the suggestions..#i was like no!! no!! but he's so funny!!!!!! and the second he showed up in game again i started taking screenshots of me n the bestieee#it wouldnt be accurate to say that i am Emotional about this but i am like aw man...but he was so funny...insert montage of All The Memorie#was crazy seeing her looking so distressed in a cutscene. girl me too! he was so funny </3#the loud ass screenshot sound effects throughout the cutscene were funny though.this is who i am#altogether i have like 150+ screenshots of this game thus far.serious shit#IN OTHER NEWS:#- i cant stop laughing at finding out that a.lphinaud is in fact 16 years old. like i was guessing he was 17 or so but man it checks out#so hard. smart fella or not of course the sixteen year old boy naively founded a private army. it checks out so hard. hes cute :)#- since the tail end of arr patch quests ive been checking npc dialogue of relevant characters and thats a bit of a goldmine sometimes#- the first time aymeric(?) (not double checking via google ive learned my lesson) showed up i joked that he was going to be an akc type#and well no. he's really not. but i did cackle when it was revealed that he was a bastard child. clocked him on accident#- addicted to dalamud red dye. was funny when estinien started rocking his blood red armor like omg now we're Extra twinsies!#funny to me when they acknowledge the whole drg class stuff. like ah yes the Other azure drg. sorry estinien this feels like stolen valor#this is just what happens when u play f.fiv multiple times when u are r like 6. and also just think lances are sexy.#- can't wait to find out where tf the rest of the scions went. hi guys. you wont Believe what happened while you were AFK!#that's right! dragons! and then theyre like I Haven't Seen The Light Of The Sun For An Ambiguous Amount Of Time...cowabummer!#i keep joking abt needing to do a wellness check on urianger but honestly hes fine hes living it up in the sand. hes doing fine#- anyway can someone do a wellness check on ysayle(?).#- i've unlocked flight in a couple zones! thankkk god. some of these places are ROUGH to navigate without it sometimes.#- my keybinds are rough. also i have a gauge now. havent gotten to use it bc of level sync but anyway this feels like school#dont worry chat i only do duties with other real players when i Literally Have To Because They Make Me#- anyway. very ? about what theyre going to do with the rest of this story. intrigued. and quite sleepy i must say.
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Okay after freaking out about alhaitham it’s time to be neurotic again that girl is freaking me out sm :D
#like bro I don’t understand wallah I don’t#I’m so confused and it’s literally ruining everything#dora daily#AND I NEVER SAY WALLAH ABOUT ANYTHING THIS IS HOW BAD ITS RUINING ME AAAAAAH#on one hand she’s ignoring me on the other she isn’t and she genuinely doesn’t see any of my posts#on the other she just forgot#ALL OF WHICH ARE SHIT OPTIONS#IT ISNT FAIR#i even tried liking her posts to show her yo I’m alive in case she didn’t see#I TRIED SENDING HER AN ASK ABOUT SOMETHING WEEKS AGO AND SHE DIDNT REPLY#I am trying so freaking hard and it is not working#and it’s fucking me up because what the fuck did I even do man#I didn’t do anything different#why do people ALWAYS do this I don’t fucking get it#it would’ve been much kinder if she just dropped me from the beginning when I was so hesitant with her#before I got so attached because what she’s doing right now is literally not only torture but so incredibly cruel#like I was getting obsessed with this one girl at work once but she ghosted me relatively early on in the very beginning stages of my#obsession coming into fruition and guess what IM TOTALLY FINE WITH IT NOW#BUT SHE LET THE RELATIONSHIP DEVELOP FOR MONTHS#then introduced a third party then now she doesn’t even acknowledge me#she is making me sewerslidal and it’s literally ruining everything#any time I would try to study I think of her and it freaks me out#every time I try to focus I think of her and it freaks me out#even when I go to sleep bro#like 8 ish weeks ago or so it literally was making me so messed up that if I hadn’t gone outside for a necessary out of uni task then my dad#taking me sight seeing in said area I genuinely don’t know what would have happened#because the level of rage I felt or whatever it was#was the most insane form of genuine torture ever#THIS WHOLE POST SEEMS NEUROTIC AND I’m just like I don’t even know anymore man#but what do I even do atp like bro
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I've come to the conclusion that I can read and enjoy the most fucked up literature as long as it doesn't feel mean. It's hard to explain but as long as the book/manga/comic/whatever doesn't feel mean spirited I'm totally down.
#being mean includes like exploitative#racist#ect#I don't mean that the work can't have those things I mean the work doesn't revel in those things#IE House. i love that show it's incredibly fucked up but it's not mean ya know#it as a show doesn't revel in being unkind#or try to justify what happens as what should happen bc the characters are the way they are ya know#an example I come across a lot in media of “being mean”#is when a character is created solely just to be maligned by others and we should just accept them treating that character this way#bc they (usually a she) deserves it#if the entire book/manga/comic/show/movie feels like that then that's when I have problems#it's hard to explain but I hope you know what I mean#conversely#I absolutely despised +A no tachiichi#it felt so much like “Yeah. Fuck this girl in particular for no reason but our entertainment”#It's literally the most mid tryheard to be bittersweet Isekai in theory but holy hell#can't be bittersweet if there's nothing sweet ever#the mc is constantly shit on#some of the characters are like we only are mean to you to make you try to defend yourself:)#which is total bullshit#and then when she actually tries to defend herself they keep shitting on her#and accepts it like “Yeah they helped me:) they were right”#And I must stress that as far a subject matter is concerned It's literally nothing#like it's tame as hell but god#made me miserable reading it
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Ooh girl.... shock me like an electric eel...
#baby girl turn me on with your electric feel#im trying. im maybe doing better?#its unclear#i am trying not to hate her i guess. its hard.#the other day i was talking to my mom about her and i realized oh wait. im literally fucking insane what the hell is wrong with me.#im obsessed.#like yes of course she has done some terrible things to me and to others.#but like. i was in the wrong toom#*too#i could have just not tried so hard????#i could have taken a fucking hint????#but i clung on because im unwell.#anyway shes still the worst but like.... we were soulmates so it's no surprise that im pretty bad too.#from the couch#for my archives :]#Spotify
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i used to be really good at and into science and math stuff in high school especially chemistry but since spending four years at university getting the world's most useless degree (BA music) (not even performance emphasis) (point and laugh) i haven't really done anything stem since then apart from the worst required physics 101 class in the galaxy so now instead of being smart and doing actual experiments in the lab myself i microdose science by watching chemists on youtube do shit like trying to make a fast food hamburger as flammable as possible
#sasha speaks#both of my parents have chemistry degrees my sister is finishing her masters in ecology#i have an aunt who's so computer science she helped make The Cloud. her two sons are like.#some kind of physicist i think and a literal rocket scientist (aerospace engineering maybe?? idk what my cousins do honestly.)#and i. play oboe#and used to do chem club demos for girl scouts at science fairs#i don't know what the point of this post was. just a glimpse into my brain when i'm questioning why i'm not asleep yet ig#dude i was on the mathletes team for like three years. remember that. shit was crazy#i wanna talk about me#i tried so hard to take chemistry instead of physics for my science gen ed. i tried SO hard.#the lab sections NEVER worked out with orchestra#none of the other science classes that fulfilled the requirement ever fit in my schedule either#so i got stuck with Literal Last Choice Physics 101. taught by The Worst Professor (TM)
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something i think some people don’t understand is that everyone has different things that happen to them in their life!!! just because something isn’t emotional to you doesn’t mean you should try and tell people who did find it emotional it’s not!!!! people have lived beyond who you know in person!!!!!
#i saw a barbie post and it reminded me of this#like this is so fucking simple and some people do not get it#i bawled my eyes out at the end of the barbie movie because it took me back when i was younger and i really connected with it#but my friends (who i went to see it with) didn’t cry at it or find it emotional and have since tried to convince me it wasn’t sad#you don’t know why i cried at it!! you don’t get it!#and when i try to tell them “you don’t get it because we’ve had different lives” they say there’s nothing to get because it’s not sad#they don’t get it because they haven’t had my particular experience - the same way i haven’t had theirs#i don’t know how difficult it is to not discredit someone’s emotions but it can’t be that hard#the barbie movie is really important and special to me as someone who struggles with identity#my friends don’t know this so i can’t blame them for that but the point still stands#the age old thing you are taught when you are literally a young child is that you don’t know what people are going through so be respectful#but they and other people don’t seem to understand that despite being well older than a young child#you have no idea why i find it sad. let me find it sad and move on with your life.#particularly two of them seem to try and cement this point that the film and the billie eilish song (which i literally cannot listen to)#aren’t sad#it really does irritate me because any possibility i get to say something’s sadness can be entirely subjective in some cases i am dismissed#these people are girls. they played with barbies. and still i can bet every one of us associates different things to when they played with#barbies. they do not get that.#i can’t really describe my relationship with the barbie movie properly and maybe it’s just me having a fit about it but it is so so persona#to me.#sorry for the rant.#barbie movie#barbie 2023#zad talks
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