#and its proving difficult
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obvi no post today but I thought I'd share one of the things that I've done this week in relation to the legacy, a spreadsheet of most of my sims and their middle names!
Mainly this is so I can keep track of them, as I've peppered in some middle names throughout the years but never wrote them down anywhere.
Some little tidbits in no particular order,
most common middle name is from a grandparent, Aiden, Eevee, Leon, Carmelo, and Oliver all have them.
Rose is a middle name that will continue to show up in the Cortes family lineage.
Cordy and Xavier both have their father's last name as their middle name. (Marin is Arturo's original last name but he changed it upon getting married. Rory and Susanna have diff middle names.)
All of the Royals kids have a middle name starting with A so all their initials are OAR or JAR.
Of all these sims, Susanna, Kim, Rory, Xavier, Calliope, Whitney, Tad, Sorella, Eevee, Gigi, and Opal have all had their middle names included in a legacy post somewhere.
#cortes legacy extras#i did this mainly to figure out what im going to name whitney and darions twins that i decided they should have#and its proving difficult#mainly because it needs to be names that work with the vibe of charlotte and wesley as names#im sure it'll come to me#oh and ya if u notice... other than whit and darion- cordy and raina are destined to have a kiddo soon :3
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once again sao abridged has reminded me that *in the novels* sugu’s thing with kazuto wasn’t “wah wah i’m in love with my brother and i’m jealous of his girlfriend” and it was always “i don’t know you anymore and i don’t know which one of us changed but i don’t think i fit into your life anymore and that scares me” with an underlying hint of “it’s my fault you left and i can’t forgive myself for it”
#sao abridged#can something witty like. stop proving how fucking easy it would’ve been to just… animate/adapt her properly lmao#‘those are difficult to get across without the description from the novels’ its actually not that hard#like a fan made meme project gets it better actually. how did the official anime fuck it up so bad
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The trick to writing a smut scene for a het pairing from the mans POV is to make him absolutely wrecked. He needs to be full on simping. It doesn't matter if that's not "realistic"- if that dude is taking himself seriously to an unbearable degree, if he's only thinking about himself and his wants- if he's hung up on things like virginity/proving virginity, and pleasure is wholly centered around him- it's ALWAYS going to come off gross and unsexy.
It's supposed to be fantasy, and if your audience is primarily women, then you're writing for the female gaze.
Thanks for coming to my TED talk
#if i have to read one more sex scene where a man is trying to prove a womans virginity and she is just totally fine with this#or its just pure penetration and she gets off in 3 strokes#im going to lose it like how is this difficult to understand???#like just make him desperate and slutty for the FMC and every though revolves around her pleasure#OR DONT WRITE IT FROM HIS POV
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I do think it’s quite interesting how GRRM’s ideals of a good king are confronted and challenged in Jon’s storyline.
Jon is undoubtedly a good person. And he has the capability to be a good king. But being a good person in the world of ASOIAF is not always rewarded. And being a good king is easier said than done.
“They say the king gives justice and protects the weak.” She started to climb off the rock, awkwardly, but the ice had made it slippery and her foot went out from under her. Jon caught her before she could fall, and helped her safely down. The woman knelt on the icy ground. “M’lord, I beg you—”
“Don’t beg me anything. Go back to your hall, you shouldn’t be here. We were commanded not to speak to Craster’s women.”
“You don’t have to speak with me, m’lord. Just take me with you, when you go, that’s all I ask.”
All she asks, he thought. As if that were nothing.
“I’ll … I’ll be your wife, if you like. My father, he’s got nineteen now, one less won’t hurt him none.”
(Jon III, ACOK)
The situation with Gilly at Craster’s Keep is a perfect example of how difficult it is to give the king’s justice in certain situations. Jon wants to help Gilly, he even feels guilty and horrible for choosing not to, but he cannot so easily offer his help because he is a man of the Night’s Watch.
What’s interesting about this conversation is that Gilly addresses and appeals to Jon as she would a king. She places herself as the weak party and Jon as the king who is expected to protect the weak. She kneels to him, as one kneels to a king, and addresses him as “M’lord”; ironic because Jon is just a bastard, who is now a member of the Night’s Watch. Much has been said about this exchange, and fandom often gives Jon a lot less empathy than he deserves. The truth is that he is in a very terrible situation, notwithstanding the character development that is to come regarding his perception of the wildlings.
But I’m looking back at GRRM’s quote about how being king gives one wealth and power and ability to do something, anything. This is something that Jon absolutely lacks in this situation. He may have been symbolically positioned as the rightful king by the narrative, but that doesn’t mean he has any actual power to enact change within the narrative itself. If Jon were nearly as callous about this whole situation as this fandom wants us to believe, he wouldn’t feel so guilty about refusing to help Gilly as he does later on. P.S: I also want to note that Sam is often lauded for being the one to help the girl, “unlike Jon”…except, Sam only does so when the chaos that follows the mutiny and Craster’s death gives Gilly the opportunity to flee. Sam understood that he had no power to help Gilly early in ACOK and that’s why he sent her to Jon. But he also overestimated just how much Jon would be able to do at that moment. Jon may have been the Lord Commander’s steward, but that didn’t give him the ability to go against Mormont (especially when the LC himself was turning a blind eye to Craster’s vices).
It’s then interesting how this situation of a young girl trying to flee a precarious situation is repeated later on in ADWD and this time, Jon manages to help her. Except the difference is that Jon is the Lord Commander now, not just the LC’s steward. What he couldn’t do for Gilly in ACOK, he can do for Alys even though that too places him in a tough situation.
“Why not the king? Karhold declared for Stannis.”
“My uncle declared for Stannis, in hopes it might provoke the Lannisters to take poor Harry’s head. Should my brother die, Karhold should pass to me, but my uncles want my birthright for their own. Once Cregan gets a child by me they won’t need me anymore. He’s buried two wives already.” She rubbed away a tear angrily, the way Arya might have done it. “Will you help me?”
“Marriages and inheritance are matters for the king, my lady. I will write to Stannis on your behalf, but—”
Alys Karstark laughed, but it was the laughter of despair. “Write, but do not look for a reply. Stannis will be dead before he gets your message. My uncle will see to that.”
“What do you mean?”
“Arnolf is rushing to Winterfell, ’tis true, but only so he might put his dagger in your king’s back. He cast his lot with Roose Bolton long ago … for gold, the promise of a pardon, and poor Harry’s head. Lord Stannis is marching to a slaughter. So he cannot help me, and would not even if he could.” Alys knelt before him, clutching the black cloak. “You are my only hope, Lord Snow. In your father’s name, I beg you. Protect me.”
(Jon IX, ADWD)
We’re seeing a repeat of Gilly and Jon here. Alys is now the weak and helpless maid and Jon, who is still a brother of the Night’s Watch, is once again made to play the role of a king.
Obviously the narrative, as it was with Gilly’s situation in ACOK, is saying that Jon is the king because while Alys could’ve pinned her hopes on Stannis Baratheon (who is actually titled), she chose to flee north to Jon the bastard. And what’s interesting this time is that Jon actually helps Alys in whatever way he can. He uses his status as Lord Commander and his dealings with the Thenns to secure Alys’ marriage. He oversteps his bounds as Lord Commander, and the irony is that he starts to act more as a king would.
So it’s interesting to see how the character often marked as the true king by GRRM’s narrative handles the moral obligations that come with kingship. And GRRM is putting Jon through these tests when he doesn’t even have a crown of his own. GRRM often makes Jon prove his worth as a king despite thinking of himself only as a bastard. We see this best when Stannis comes to the Wall.
Surprisingly, Stannis smiled at that. “You’re bold enough to be a Stark. Yes, I should have come sooner. If not for my Hand, I might not have come at all. Lord Seaworth is a man of humble birth, but he reminded me of my duty, when all I could think of was my rights. I had the cart before the horse, Davos said. I was trying to win the throne to save the kingdom, when I should have been trying to save the kingdom to win the throne.” Stannis pointed north. “There is where I’ll find the foe that I was born to fight.”
(Jon XI, ASOS)
It is true that Jon and Stannis are in very different situations. Stannis is aware that he is the rightful king (as Robert’s heir), and he has also heard from Melisandre that he is the prophesied prince. Jon, on the other hand, is a bastard boy completely unaware of his royal birth or his magical destiny. Yet it’s so interesting that it’s Jon the bastard who was actually doing his duty as the king (without even knowing it) whereas Stannis had to be reminded of it. So despite his failings every now and then, Jon does live up to the author’s ideal of a great king.
#in my king jon feels again dksjsnsnsdj#this started as an introspective look at the morally difficult choices Jon has to make across the series and how that relates to kingship#and then took a turn into jonsnowdefensesquad nonsense in the middle smh#2 am thoughts#jon snow#asoiaf#valyrianscrolls#forgot to add but that last stannis bit is why I think jon will be king at the end of the story and not in twow like most jon stans#grrm legit puts my boy through the ringer#he will have to prove his worth (and make lots of morally ambiguous choices)#he needs to save the kingdom FIRST then be its king
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ok yeah i think i might be entering the critical Autumn Madness period actually
#nothing feels real and time is some kind of thick jelly and I Forgor.#it's getting real difficult to order my thoughts & speech again. you know how it is. or oh well i hope you don't!#i cant believe i wrote this poem less than a week ago? it's like a singular moment that feels like a dream and is suspended in Nothingness#and i remembered the moment & experience that led to its creation but not the actual poem itself - not something which happens usually#might as well have dreamed it#so i just. uh. rediscovered it. feels like an eternity has passed#but it's only been four days#what have i been doing these past four days?#mystery#i remember a few things but cant account for the rest of my activities. bit scary innit!#merely writing these words is proving a uphill battle also. slurry in my skull#we Are struggling
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I love Beauyasha so much. I miss them so much.
The reunion gave me so much joy and now I'm in this weird happy but melancholy state. I love the Nein so much and I want more of them. And I especially want more of Beau and Yasha. If we get a Fjorester wedding one shot, I will be stoked. But then also give me the Beauyasha wedding too!
I'm really just hoping they keep doing these little reunions cause I love the Mighty Nein so much and seeing them makes me so happy.
#critical role#cr spoilers#beauyasha#the mighty nein#echoes of the solstice#and the rest of the tags are a rant#got a bit carried away lol#my depression has been real bad for the past like 9 months and i dont have the money or resources to go to therapy#so i am in a real interesting head space lately#this one shot gave me so much joy#i haven't felt that engaged and excited and happy in a long time#but now that its over that feeling is being joined by (like i said) this weird melancholy that i've never felt in this way before#tm9 mean so much to me#beauyasha means so much to me#especially in these times with the strikes and all the cancelations of wlw inclusive media#i've been trying to get back into c3 but getting through those first arcs is proving difficult#bh just doesn't feel the same as the m9 to me which is fine but sad in a way#cause I feel like there's still so much the nein could do and participate in#i definitely understood what ashley meant when she said she didn't feel like she was done with yasha#i feel the same#so i hope they keep doing these one shots and i hope they release some news on the animated show soon#and here's hoping that as I catch up on bh i can come to love them even half as much as tm9#cause that'd be enough to keep me coming back and then some
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strange question maybe:
is there dragons from Palestine? im not finding much folklore but St George 's dragon and i don't care -
im looking for beasts and tales from that area, as well as symbols, but im not able to find much for reasons you would expect.
if anybody has knowledge, i am interested to learn
#some thoughts#its been on my mind for a bit#and search proves difficult#so asking is next#nebs words
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I'm trying to keep The ground on my feet It seems the world's falling down around me
new playlist !! this is a small collection of songs inspired by re2 leon, all that would have released/charted by september 1998 ... just in time for him to listen on his first drive to the RPD :]
#leon kennedy#re2 leon#resident evil#resident evil 2#character playlist#orion.mp3#i tried doing only release date in '98 but it proved difficult since obviously stuff can release at one time but chart later#so its a bit of a mix :]#pls lmk if you spot any errors smile .
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I am going fucking insane do they make drivers ed intentionally brain melting??
Everytime i hear this mans voice i feel like im watching honey crystalize or paint dry or cheese Very Slowly grow moldy
Like i know im overreacting but i cant focus on this?? I have to do 30 hours and its like every time i start watching one of the videos my brain turns off and i cant focus on what hes saying i hate online learning stuff so much
i dont care if i have to go to a classroom just make me learn this in literally any other way than listening to this man reading aloud multiple choice questions from a weirdly formatted slideshow for 30 minutes straight with the crunchiest audio known to man
#i know online learning is probably cheaper#but do you want me to be good at driving or not??#this is kinda important#IF I HEAR THIS GUY GO#And#the correct answer is#C#ONE MORE TIME#vammieposts#i sit in apush lectures for forty minutes everyday and im able to focus#clearly theres a wY to do this so its not so dull#JUST STOP WITH THE MULTIPLE CHOICE QUESITONS I BEF#like who decided this was a good idea?? multiple choice stuff is so repetitibe it all blends togther#and now i remember the wrong answers more often than the cofrect answers!’#drivers ed#i have 25 more hours of this i really dont think i can handle it#yes im overreacting but i cant do busywork i cant focus on dull things i really want to learn this and its not being taught well and that#upsets me a lot#its so so frustrating when theres an easy solution to bad systems and formats#and people dont see it??#it upsets me that so many things are being switched to online when that more often than not makes it MORE difficult??#my schools digital hallpass things??#unique apps to pay for parking in each coty??#digital doesnt automaticaly meant more efficient or convinient#its helpful in some areas#and much worse in others#this drivers ed is the worse end of the spectrum#because instead of being like oh heres the slideshow read it and take the test#it gives you a specific amount of hours you have to spend watching videos#i could just walk away and let the bideo play! like how does that prove that i know anything thats being tuaght??
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ever draw any non-atla and non-zukka related art? i feel like this sounds condescending but it's a genuine question
i love your art and your style and i wonder if you draw non-atla stuff without telling us 🤔
ah, yeah! if you scroll through my archive i occasionally post some non-atla stuff.
i usually just don't post most of the non-atla stuff. it's mostly just stuff for friends or personal projects/interests. but im gonna try to post some bg3 and d20 art soon....
Is there anything in particular people would like to see from me?
#asks#thanks for the ask!#ive also just been doing a lot of commissions that are for other characters but i tend not to post those#idk usually my non atla stuff doesn't have much of an audience here and sometimes i just like drawing super self indulgent things for me#i also have a random oc wlw vampire/vampire hunter mini comic i was tossing around by its proving difficult. but i like the concept
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my brother has been dating this girl for almost 7 months now and we've yet to be properly introduced and tbh i kinda wanna keep it that way just to see how long i can go
#prince's talk tag#theres nothing wrong with her and i dont hate her (i never spoke a word to her)#but its kinda funny how she's slept over multiple times and we havent even said hi to each other#like ive seen her and shes seen me but we never made eye contact it was always from the back or side#and neither of us have made the effort to say hi to the other so really I wanna keep it that way#tho this may come to prove difficult bc shell be coming over tomorrow for a bbq and unless i stay in my room this game will end#and idk if i can get away with staying in my room the whole time tomorrow
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Hhh
#im trying really hard to get back into school#but i became a dropout from hs largely because of untreaded add(supposedly its all adhd now?) so im trying really hard to get reassessed.#i havent been in school for 15 years and the idea of going back and not being able to focus is terrifying.#but i heard seeking a diagnosis is really difficult. and since my rents didnt keep any of my medical records i cant just prove i was#diagnosed in the 90s. something tells me even if i had proof it wouldnt mean anything.#this is all pretty overwhelming and ive barely done anything.
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it deeply agonizes me that the speak now elements of the manuscript are never discussed in favor of the atw of it all..... like i just. "in the age of him she wished she was 30 and made coffee every morning in a french press" vs "someday when we're older, this is something we'll laugh about over coffee every morning while you're watching the news," "now and then she rereads the manuscript of the entire torrid affair" vs "i used to think one day i'd tell the story of us," "afterwards she only ate kids cereal and couldn't sleep unless it was in her mother's bed" vs never grow up exploring the idea of moving out for the first time & how she couldn't be sleeping in her mother's bed if she was already moved out (also robin being the last song before the manuscript already creating this mental connection)..... please im insane
#album: the tortured poets department#album: speak now#the manuscript#multi song#red strings#textposts#speak now/ttpd sister analysis#also ideas of ''give you my heart'' vs the half of my heart JM collab#and ''slow dance alight with the sparks'' vs JM's slow dancing in a burning room#but tho i think they're Relevant i kinda don't like making stuff about the Men™ of it all#cause the point of the story is that it's an analysis on personal trauma and an exploration of the reason all the behaviors on ttpd happen#but like. so much of ttpd is paralleled in speak now like that album is Thee catalyst for everything#also atw10 being written during speak now tour rehearsals inherently makes atw speak now coded too so like. you cannot escape speak now#she haunts the narrative#but the manuscript makes me insane every time i think about it#you go through the whole main album and think things like#''hmm bdilh has real ours energy. i can fix him has real superman delulu energy. tsmwel has real dear john energy''#down bad is haunted and mbobhft is innocent and fresh out the slammer is sparks fly and ttpd is mine and guilty as sin is i can see you#and then you get to the end of it all and you realize that there was a Point to those parallels#that there was a Point to wcs and the midnights 3am trilogy/storyline#that speak now's story and themes are the catalyst for literally e verything#both in terms of an emotional sense and also a work ethic sense#the idea that speak now was fully self written as a means of proving naysayers wrong#and that mentality goes hand in hand with the denial and desperation to prove others wrong about this romantic relationship#and there's success in one path but not in the other and it's so difficult to reconcile with that (the prophecy)#god its all too much these tags don't even scratch the surface#i desperately need to just write this whole essay or i'll go insane with all these thoughts
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My headcanons for the named trio in The Cursing of Chateau Castle series:
Josephandre is a big bear. It just fits for him I think! He gets he/him pronouns, and as a way to make him a liiiil more relatable for Mira, he'd have two craft types (Rock type being his main one and paper craft for the other). Battle style wise, I think it fits him to be more of a self-sustaining tank. He buffs defense, heals, and puts up shields. For his weapon, he'd use his fists like Isabeau. He'll be the second fastest in the trio.
Lady Irene-Janine-Kanine looks like an elegant noblewoman on the outside but she has vibes similar to Euphrasie! She gets she/her pronouns. Her craft type is Paper. Battle style wise, she's more on the offensive side, a main dps kind of thing. Most of her skills focus on buffing attack and speed, she'd have an item that helps regen her hp a lil bit and her chosen weapon is an umbrella. The tip is a sharp blade so it's used like a spear that has a hidden sword in its handle. Open it, and it becomes a shield! That'd be one of her skills too, although it's only applicable to her. She's the fastest one of the trio.
Pierre-Jacques-Erneste looks like a nobleman and carries himself as such! He gets he/they pronouns. Their craft type is Scissors. Battle style wise, he's more of a debuffer, skills focusing on weakening the enemies, slowing them down, poisoning them. Their weapon is a sword dagger, though he doesn't seem to be able to handle it well, how clumsy! But he Is a nobleman so it makes sense! Oh but... why doesn't he have a title? They're the slowest one of the trio, how strange, he seemed to be faster than Lady Irene-Janine-Karine that one time though.
#aria rants#how do i even tag these things bro im like-- why am i such a fan of a fragmented series in isat#okay so-- josephandre relied mostly on raw strength when he was travelling all alone before meeting the others#and i think he'd have a fun uncle vibe to him. which makes it easy for others to approach him and befriend him#but he Also carries a sort of pride and dignity to him which makes the others mistake him for a nobleman cuz of it#esp considering the fact that he later became famous for helping those in need and such.#lady irene on the other hand. being a noble she's always had to keep her guard up. also doesnt help that noblewomen#got the short end of the stick what with the ''arrange marriage'' things and being below noblemen#her umbrella weapon helps a lot in warding off the assholes. i think that during the journey with josephandre's party#she got to finally be herself without needing to sugarcoat her words in a way that a noble should. she would also figure out a#way to improve on her shield spell to not only apply to just her but her entire party too. she cares a lot about them after all#meanwhile i got a Whole scenario for pierre (being an illegitimate child of a noble family and all that. i made a post bout it)#he's actually a lot more capable than what he makes himself appear as. but its like part of the plan on getting the others#to lower their guards around him for when pierre betrays them. in actuality pierre is actually faster than irene altho#not much stronger still (irene and josephandre are still stronger than him) considering that pierre mainly focused on#stealth type attacks. hes more used to using a sword than a dagger (he mightve wanted to prove their worth)#it makes their battle style and weapon clash due to the fact that swords arent that good for stealth much than a dagger#its one of the reasons why hes trying to get used to the dagger than the sword. but it is a bit difficult to learn a new weapon
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also it'd be rly funny if one day he was idly looking at the pins on my bag and notices one that looks like a Sinnoh gym badge that he recognizes bc of something he'd seen at one point so he asks me about it and I go like "oh yeah, this line of pins is all the gym badges from Sinnoh" and he thinks it's just like... tourism decorations or smth so he makes a teasing joke about me having wishful thinking of wanting to beat all the gym leaders in battle and I look at him all confused like "no those are real ? i did do that ??" and he's like WHAT ?? WHY DID U NEVER MENTION IT BEFORE ????
bro i am SHY and i dont like to talk about big things like that esp if it takes me longer to achieve than the average person !!! i would much rather share cool facts about nature that i learned or show u the latest creative project I worked on !!!
#i think beating gym leaders in ur home region is kind of a rite of passage that most higher level/dedicated trainers achieve#more dedicated trainers would go to other regions outside of their home region to beat the gym leaders in those places too#i would just complete sinnoh just to say i did it and to prove to my parents that i could fnfkdl#get them off my back abt it and then they'd let me go traveling a little bit easier#but really all im interested in is ecosystems and plants and pokemon behaviour and stuff LOL#plus i think I'd be embarrassed bc it'd likely take me a bit longer than the average trainer to beat all the gym leaders#bc of Le Abuse. makes it difficult for various reasons dnfkdl.#so I wouldn't rly talk abt it ever. its just not a point of pride for me djfkdl#but he'd be like NO THATS ABSOLUTELY SMTH TO BE PROUD OF ?? THATS IMPRESSIVE THAT U DID IT AT ALL !!#and I'd just be like. shrug. can i tell u abt this cool fact i learned today about s.pinarak's blood system being similar to hydraulics?#HDDHDJSKL#dandy.cmd#💜so good at being in trouble#💜a boy and his bug🪲#junebug 🪲
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the default eyes 🤢
#it took ages for my game to update but its done lets goooooo#trying to make a non cc sim besides like my default skin is proving difficult
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