#and its difficult i just cant do enough. i just cant do enough even though i do fuck all with my life and i cant outrun the old anxiety

[pseudophan]

gonna be so sad when tonight is the first preshow space with good audio and i'm asleep because i have a psych appointment tomorrow

[purityvalentine]

working with after effects and not managing to make a single thing look even remotely good is very demoralising and i will be going to bed about it even though i only woke up 6 hours ago.

[ketavinsky]

honestly i thought that joining a writing group would hold me accountable to deadlines and motivate me to write more but instead im so constantly stressed i can barely sleep

[strwbrymlkshake]

LOVE ME THE MOST THE MOST YOU POSSIBLY CAN!!!!!! LOVE ME THE MOST I NEED TO BE THE ONLY THING IN YOUR MIND

[kirexa]

‎

[kismetlotts]

Omg omg hii I have this super request of Price slipping into his beautiful neighbour’s house, (just the way the man was so good at staying in the shadows when he entered Shepherd’s pffice) slipping something funny into the water she’s supposed to drink after a workout... She passes out in a matter of minutes after sitting down and by the time she wakes up, she’s so sore and sticky yet can’t even seem to remember why... or falling asleep at all!

Fucking love this idea! Got a little carried away though and made Price a bit of a stalker- but I hope you don’t mind!

cw: noncon, rape, use of drugs (spiking), Price is a little bit of a stalker, mentions of hand jobs, fingering, self tasting, oral sex on fem, being ejaculated on, watching through window, mentions of stealing panties, Price has a little obsession with the reader, mentions of spit, a lot of sweat, use of degrading name e.g 'bitch', Price can't see what he is doing is wrong, mentions of exercise, rough sex, a lot of manhandling, neighbour next door trope

"Need any help with those?" Was what started it all off. Price was in the midst of bringing in groceries after being away for so long due to work in the military. The boot of his car raised as bags of necessities- food, beer, what not- were pretty much trickling out and onto the pavement.

He lived in a local quiet area of town, houses decently sized and kept tidy. Lawns frequently mowed, flowers always grown and planted- such a shame how little sunshine England got because it would look like something out of a movie. John was also acquainted well with a lot of the elderly folk around there, most of them having lived their way before he even moved in.

It was perfect for him, given he was usually a bit of a grumpy bastard, living alone in a neighbourhood like that was a breath of fresh air. His neighbours understood him and kept to themselves but not in the distance unwelcoming way, the respecting kid of way. It made him feel secure- snug like a childhood blanket; warm, safe and familiar.

So it’s not difficult to envision the look on his face when he turned around, catching you exiting the house next door. Body in them tight gym shorts and shirt to match as you practically ran over to him. Fucking hell, what had he missed? He had to blink twice; once to register was going on and a second time to look away because your body was enchanting. Forcefully having to drag his eyes away from the plump curves of your ass- the shape of your thighs- your breasts.

Passing you one of the bags from the car, carrying three himself because- of course he had to show off his own strength and muscle to you. A jolt of arousal electrocuting his body from your skin brushing his hand; cock swelling up erratically and his eyebrows furrowed. Johns head immediately leaping to imagine scenarios with them soft fingers of yours.

Finger tips only just touching as your hand spread around the base of his girthy cock, stroking him slowly, looking into his eyes as you bite your lip nervously, wondering if you were doing a good enough job- if you were pleasing him right. He cleared his throat, swallowing thickly as the pulse in his cock died down. He couldn't let himself get distracted so easily, come on John, what has gotten into you?

As you helped him unload, you explained how you'd moved in next door a couple months ago, not realising anyone actually lived in his house. Rambling on about how nice all the neighbours seem and how easy it was to settle down. How safe this side of town was but honestly, John didn't care one bit.

He wasn't listening to the words despite him deceiving you with his humming and nodding. He was listening to the sound of your voice instead. The sickeningly sweet tone chirping into his ear so delicately it made his hands tremble. Fingers desperate to reach out and touch you like a child with fire.

He knows it will burn, he knows he cant but its just so pretty- he was losing fucking control, who the hell were you?

He'd imagine all the noises you'd make with him above you, finger fucking you until your words were all broken and tearful. Ripping out of your cunt harshly before forcing the fingers into your mouth. Shuddering at the feel of your tongue tracing laps around them, tasting yourself, doing exactly what he guides you to do.

"Do you taste good?" He'd ask you slowly, breath hitting your face from how close the distance between you is. Voice thick with husk and lust because he couldn't let you realise the power you have over him. How weak you get him at the knees- you could have him a begging mess if you asked.

A scarred yet smooth large hand grabbing you by the cheeks, squishing your adorable face so hard your lips shine with spit. Holding you like that and watching your skin pale when he lets go. Not bothering to actually hear your reply before going down and tasting you for himself.

From such short little interaction, a sick fascination had blossomed inside him. Wrapped in his head, tied in his chest and sunken deep in his stomach- it was more an obsession than a little crush. He'd watch you through his window as you pottered around in your kitchen oblivious to his gaze- it wasn't stalking to watch you all the time, he was just watching your back.

If being in the military taught him one thing it was to be cautious of your surroundings, because you never know what might happen - who could be lurking over you. So all he was doing was looking after you, really.

He knew your routine off by heart, when you would shower, when you would sleep, eat- work: He knew it better than you did yourself. He also knew things about you that you didn't even know. Like how many pairs of underwear you go through in a week.

His large muscular arm counting them as he shuffled through your wash basket being sure to snatch one for himself later, as you hummed innocently in the shower: unaware to his presence. And why your phone kept unplugging during the night when you slept, watching your angry face through the glass as you wake up and curse yourself out because you swore you plugged it in and now you have to wait an extra 20 minutes for your phone to charge up before going for your morning jog.

An extra 20 minutes of pacing in front of your window in your tight gym clothes, getting a few more stretches in because why not- you have the time.

Oh and you definitely didn't know about the faulty lock on your back door, and how when you jiggle it a bit the fucker just opens up with ease. How little effort it was to slip inside and glide around your home, the smell of you saturated into the sofa, the bed, the walls, precum dribbling into the fabric of his boxers. Your house really was yours, everything down to the last detail was just you.

He felt like he couldn't breathe yet breathing heavily was all he could bring himself to do. Lingering in the shadows as his fingers trailed along the kitchen counters, fist wrapping around the pink plastic of your water bottle. Silly silly little girl, you shouldn't have left it home because now he can’t stop himself.

Stood behind your front door, black hoodie blending him in as you stepped inside, panting like a dog- a bitch- from your run. Hair drenched in sweat that trickled down your forehead and neck making your skin look aureate- glowing.

He bit back the moan watching how carelessly and greedily you guzzled down your bottle of water. Oblivious to the fact that your friendly neighbour John had tampered with it, oblivious to the fact he was right fucking there, waiting patiently for the side effects to kick in.

Your back hitting the sofa as your panting settled down, eyes drooping a little and without your knowledge or realisation you were out cold. Knocked out- head flopping back and eyes rolled. Price chuckled, walking to the back of the couch, hand hitting your head before shoving your limp body hard, forward and onto the glass coffee table.

"Bless you, love. Didn't even know I was here, did ya?" He asked you loudly, he wanted to scream it at you and if he didn't care so much about the neighbours hearing him shout, he would've. Sadly he had to be cautious.

He had to make sure that you were fully unaware of everything he was going to do to you, before and after and he wasn't going to risk it- someone was bound to check up on you after hearing shouting even if it’s just a quick question while taking the rubbish out.

His fingers entwined in your hair as he slowly crouched down beside you. Yanking you back up, flipping and positioning your body over on the table like a mannequin. The zipper of his hoodie echoing in the silence of the house and fuck, he was desperate for you.

Undressing his top half and throwing the clothes on the settee before spreading your legs wide open. Wasting no time as he ripped a fat hole in your leggings, pushing your panties to the side through the broken fabric.

Johns mouth watered as his eyes locked on your pussy, so hot and steaming with sweat but he couldn't care less- he had been wanting you for the past month despite it feeling an eternity. He really couldn't give a shit if you were clean or sweaty- shaved or not he was fucking having you right here, and right now.

His blue eyes indulged in your peaceful expression, eyelashes pressed against your puffy cheeks while his tongue licked a long aching strip up from your entrance. Throat closed dry with thirst and his body was shaking with adrenaline, holding back and restraining himself from making a mess of your pussy. Letting himself sink into you and your flavour instead; not like it was going to last long or anything.

Less than one minute in and he was eating you, spitting on you, slapping your tiny sensitive clit. Sucking on you, biting you and getting your juices all caught inside his beard, he swore blind days went by with how long he was down there. Taking his precious time and allowing himself to relax and enjoy your taste but being cautious with his actions because he didn’t want to hurt you.

He didn't want you to feel as if you'd been raped or something horrible. He didn't want you to wake up and feel so sore and achy that you panic someone came in and fucked with you. John wasn't like that- no! He just needed a favour from you and went by it in a way that doesn't cause such a hassle. Saving himself from potential rejection and awkwardness between you too, it was beneficial. He was just borrowing you.

That was neighbours do, yeah? They help each other.

His cock would ram in you so deep his eyes stung from the pleasure he felt. So wet and tight and just for him. Slowly losing touch with the sensible side of him as he picked the pace up. He shouldn't be going that hard, you were definitely going to feel something is off. Going to feel how deep he was inside you when you wake up all lost and confused.

Your clit was going to throb and sting with how much Johns tongue had flicked, sucked and bit it. The more his brain let him know of his mistakes the more he thought, 'fuck it' and let himself be rough. Dragging and moving you around like his personal little sex doll- exactly what you fucking were.

Holding your legs up in the air then switching to your body pressed against his chest, hands squeezing your hips as he pretends your riding him.

"Oh fuck, honey just look at the sight of you. Why don't you come live with me? Why don't you come stay with me next door and I’ll do all this every night." Teeth sinking into your earlobe as his question was left unanswered- he wasn't expecting a response at all but it was an excuse to fuck you harder.

An excuse to rip off your shirt and play with your breasts because you weren’t replying or him and instead was making him angry. Leaving him with no choice but to tease your nipples until he’s about to cum.

Slamming you back down on the table before fisting his cock towering above you. The swollen and desperate tip so red and dripping with precum until finally he grunted and shut his eyes. Showering you in his hot semen watching how the white spurts out and paints your body like his personal canvas.

Palms eagerly massaging the warm cum into your flesh- your stomach, your chest, up on and over neck while he regains his breath and strength. Scooping you up into his arms to carry you up your stairs and into bed, removing everything and tucking you into the sheets- naked. His heart exploded seeing how solemn and innocent you looked all cuddles up, bending down over you to kiss your forehead before leaving.

Discarding the clothes and grabbing his hoodie, making sure to wipe and clean up any juices or evidence of the two of you before leaving out the back and returning home to rest. Missing your soft little murmur as you stirred awake in your bed, confused on how you'd gotten there and where your clothes had disappeared too.

Wincing from the sores on your legs and body and the sticky feeling everywhere as you sat up in bed. A yawn falling from your lips but- oh well.

Must've been from working out earlier.

[gravesdept]

♡　＃　𓂃 Imagine you being vladimir makarovs right hand man — who he tolerates just a bit more than his other lapdogs, maybe he even lets you speak down to him, informs you on plans you have no business being in on, and lets you push his buttons.

everyone wonders whats just so special about the man whose always by makarovs side, he wonders so just as well as you both take hefty puffs off an old cigar that use to be stashed away in the back of his desk, its awfully hot in the room he thinks looking from the window back towards you who, well, is leaning just a couple inches astray from his face.

from this angle he cant see anything but the light at the end of the cigar, the room of his office fairly dark being only illuminated by light from the skyscrapers windows.

it takes a minute before you pass him back the almost dull blunt, it ends up sitting between his fingers for a bit as he trudges through his thoughts, “this situation is risky, boy, you know that righ’?” although he speaks clearly enough you cannot wrap your head around what he is implying

“not sure I understand.”

at that he puts the cig out on the desk resorting to just crossing his arms “this I mean, us, your not so subtle soldier.” he looks you dead in the eyes now, a look that youve seen men be killed for even witnessing.

its silent and almost peaceful in this small pocket of time “mm wasnt tryin’ to be subtle sir,, y’know pinning after you is no easy task.” you’d say jokingly if the man infront of you hadn’t killed many men whose ranks had rivaled yours in status, instead you stay quiet choosing to move all the bit closer to him in thought, hands resulting to rest in your jacket pockets.

“i could kill you, have you lit on fire for even thinkin such thoughts about me — yet you would just keep coming back, even offering to stand by my side like some kind of lacky in love.” he spits with just a hint of venomous tone “it repulses me even thinking about it; you fuckin’ in love with me solider?”

the scowl thats always reaching on his pretty face returns just once as he stands straight from leaning on the desk. hes still shorter than you and it only adds to his fuel.

“no m’not, hows that? was it satisfying enough for you?” a lie you half think about closing the distance between you two. but the metal that gets pressed up against your skull is enough assurance to halt the bare thought of movement.

his eyes search yours once more and before you know it your back is being pressed firmly against the desk.

maybe its the sensation from being high or just the adrenaline from this damn heat but you feel very obligated to wrap a hand around the hand thats holding up your ender, again its the post blunt high thats making you see things because his hand totally doesn’t falter when you touch it and it for sure doesn’t let you lower the gun either.

yeaaaa who laced the cigar because his facial expression isn’t in a scowl anymore its almost distraught watching you maneuver the gun to sit behind on the desk, his voice stoping you temporarily “not any further soldier. you’re messin w’ my fuckin head right now, and thats not what you want.”

the look you give him is deafening and its filled with something he cant source.

“what are you .. to decide what I want. are y’ afraid that i might break you?” you’re pushin it yet there it is again that same scowl just a bit deeper than before. its like your a fucking ticking bomb thats just wanting to explode “i'm jus’ waitin for your permission sir, to let me have you”

in another universe you might have been killed at the spot and brutally beaten until unrecognizable.

“do what you’ want, but you'd better make it damn good or i'll have to kill you.” he says backing up until his legs hit his office chair the sqeaking reminding the both of you where you just so happen to be at this hour.

but that is the last thing you’d have ever thought to hear from this oh so difficult man.

note ;; chat am I cooking even though this kind of out of character? ,, I keep blue balling cause I really cant write full fics but we getting there also requests will be opening soon, my messages are open right now if anyone wants to thirst tho.

[gatorbites-imagines]

Perhaps Hal Jordan or Clark kent with cuddling. Like just them coming home after a stressed day and you just take care of them the best you can. U offer sex but they don’t want it. Just wanting to be in ur presence for a bit yk yk

Clark Kent x Male reader

Headcanons

Hey nerds, guess who’s not dead. I feel like I am, but apparently, I’m not. Classes are kicking my ass because of very cramped timelines and long days. Who’d have thought becoming a caretaker (idk the English word) would be so difficult. A shorty, but still something I enjoyed writing.

It wasn’t a common occurrence. For Clark to come home so worn out and tired. As a man powered by the sun, a man of steel as he so regularly gets called, its very difficult to him feeling so worn down.

For the most part, the days he comes home in this mood, is not because he’s exhausted physically, but rather mentally. Be it from difficult missions, or just long days at work where he’s talked down too or pushed aside.

There is something soft and cute about him like this, though you would never tell him that. he’s always a little whinier and poutier, but also cuddlier, if that’s even possible for a guy who seems to live off affectionate contact with you.

The first thing Clark does when he comes home from days like this, is kick off whatever he’s wearing and change into something else. Most days its some ancient washed-out sweatshirts from his university days. The kind that’s been washed so many times the logo is mostly gone, and the fabric is worn thin and soft.

Its either that, or if you’re bigger than him, then it’s one of your shirts. That or just a pair of boxers and socks, so he can crawl into your space and flop down there like a big lazy cat.

If possible, Clark tries to crawl up into your shirt, laying his head on your stomach or your chest, ear pressed against your skin to listen to your heart, even if he can easily do that anywhere on the planet. Being so close just puts him at ease.

You cant hear it, but you know he’s purring, even if it’s a frequency you can’t pick up. At this point you can only really rub his back and let him soak up the affection and touch he needs like a wilted flower in the sun.

When he starts pressing featherlight kisses against your torso, you start to think maybe Clark wants something more, since he starts kneading at your sides, like you’re made from playdough, and he wants to mold you into something else.

His hands are so big and strong that you almost feel like playdough, with how insistent his rubbing and kneading can get. His kisses never go beyond soft pecks and barely there brushes of his lips, Clarks head just moving from side under your shirt as he lays on top of your legs.

You don’t need words in a situation like this, your hands becoming more exploratory, rubbing between his shoulders and tapping your fingers at his spine, like he’s a harp you’re plucking the strings off.

The change in your scent must catch his attention too, as Clark lifts his head just enough for you to see him through the collar of it, his eyes soft and glistening. They remind you of marbles, in a way. So shiny and with that clash of shades of blue.

The small downwards pout of his lips and minimal shake of his head is all you need to know, that going farther isn’t what he wants. So, you just give a nod in reply and place a hand on the back of his head, bringing him back down again.

You don’t really understand why he feels so much comfort under your shirt like this. Maybe it’s the enclosed feeling of it all, the shirt, and sometimes blanket you put on top, closing him off from the rest of the world.

Maybe its just the closure, and being surrounded by your scent, which always seems to put him at ease, or rile him up, depending on your own mood.

You don’t hate it though, you never could, not when its Clark. So, instead you just lay back, rubbing your hands slowly up and down his back and Clark nuzzles deeper against you, letting him rest there for as long as he needs.

[afro-hispwriter]

do you have any headcanons for aemond or ewan (idk if u write for real people) but what do you think either of them would be like in a relationship?

Dating Ewan Mitchell:

Ewan gives off very caring bf vibes

he definitely listens to you all the time

he has a genuine interest in what you say and he learns about you through that

he LOVES seeing you in his clothes

doesnt care if he slowly starts running out of shirts bc seeing you in them makes it better

HORROR MOVIE MARATHONS

ewan loves horror movies and if you don’t… he will respect that

but that doesn’t mean he wont try to convince you

maybe it works

maybe it doesn’t

or maybe you will just as long as you get to be cuddled up to him🤭

OMG CUDDLES

i feel like he gives AMAZING hugs so imagine just laying in your apartment together and he just pulls you into him or your in bed post sex and his arms are wrapped tight, maybe legs entwining with yours

COUPLE FIGHTS:((((((((

tbh i don’t think they would happen often, ewan seems like the guy to realize somethings wrong and bring it up to try and talk

and he seems pretty responsible so fights over chores probably wouldn’t happen

but not saying they wouldn’t happen, one that might happen is over work

if both of you are actors you might not have time too be with each other so there will be more understanding

but if you’re not a celebrity of any kind, it most likely will be a little difficult for you

ewan might but put job before you to often and that hurts:(

you have love and supported him through his hard times, you visit him on set, you go to his premieres

but it goes both ways

a fight would break out, maybe a screaming match followed by some silent treatment until one of you breaks probably ewan

it ends with make up sex

BIG BACK?

im not to sure about ewans cooking abilities since I've only even seen a mention of a steak

BUT if he can cook he probably would cook for you a lot when he can

or if he cant and you can then you’ll take on the cooking aspect

but if you’re not as together as youd like due to work or you’re having a lazy day

i see some take out or simply going out to dinner frequently

The LIL GREEN MONSTER

ngl ewan doesn’t seem like the jealous type NOW

but when his career started kicking off maybe he was a lil jealous of the people you hanged out with

or if you’re a little bit more well known than him and have an established career before him and you had been dating already

boy probably had to deal with the people you work with already and got used to it

but i see a silent jealous person in him if it comes down to it

staying right behind you

holding on to you at all times

maybe he will go as far as kissing you in front of everyone

neck kisses

A LOT of pecks

he might even get a lil handsy around the person

or he will try a full blown make out session and you’ll be like 😯🤨

you both like your privacy like the media might not even know but they will now depending on where its happening

he’s a professional but he loves you so much

but once you catch one to whats his deal

a lil talking too with some words of reassurance and a kiss ofc and he’s back to normal

The talk of MARRIAGE and/or kids probably would come up depending on how long you had been together

i can see ewan giving you a promise ring, especially if you had been dating since you were young

but i say give him two or three years and he’s on one knee

kids though….

not sure if ewan wants kids or if he does obviously just not now

so if you guys got married, kids probably wont happen immediately

unless you had an oopsie before or right after marriage

but the whippets are enough for you two for now🥰

thats all i got for now😙✌🏾

he seems like a pussy eating king ngl

legs trembling

the type to cum just by giving you pleasure

imagine the groans😩

IMAGINE THE CHAIN DANGLING

THIS ISNT A NSFW FUCKK

-

a/n- first time writing a headcannon😗i know this was supposed to be both ewan and aemond but aemonds will come later🥰

[ask-the-rag-dolly]

ok the askbox is open. im taking this opportunity to say ohhhhh im going crazy over the narrative constructed here. specifically with how audience (anon) interaction is intertwined with the main conflict.

because its like.. we are inherently a BAD THING. yes, some of us are actually malicious, but even if we do have kind intentions, and only want the best for ragatha.. just being there is a negative impact that outweighs any positives. we are a parasite, after all. and technically, the only positive action we could do is to simply.. stop engaging. leave the askblog alone. leave ragatha alone. except we could never do that, because we're too curious now, too attached- we want to see how the story continues, how it ends. we cant leave well enough alone, we just have to know. we need to know. so the cycle will continue nonetheless due to our nature. and we have to watch as our main character, the person we're rooting for, gets worse and worse. knowing that its our fault, because we're choosing to engage. we're choosing this path of pain. because we're curious, and that curiosity would kill us if we didn't feed it.

and of course its on a tadc tumblr ask blog of all things lol. no hate btw. im here enjoying it after all! though honestly i say that like this had any opportunity of existing outside of the askblog genre... or even the tumblr landscape itself- i feel like the anon feature itself is also a big part of this sort of narrative, as it allows those actively malicious anons to be even nastier. because it distances us from our actions. like.. we're given a mask, something that obscures our true identities (both to the other askers.. and to ragatha to an extent, as most all look the same to her. who knows, maybe that one supportive anon trying to cheer her up is the same one also encouraging her downfall! she cant tell!)- a thing that wipes our hands free of any consequences. a chance to become faceless and untraceable- so of course some people will indulge. be as horrible as possible. because, hey, its not like you'll be getting any consequences for it! no way to trace it back to you! no way to be held accountable! you can just sit back and watch the fire you made grow higher. more bright. thats the main goal, after all- to make a spectacle! to move the story along and make it exciting! thats the only thing that matters to you. that its entertaining. not the people you'll be harming in the process.

anyways sorry for the fucking. essay. in your askbox. i like talking and also i fucking love dissecting meta-aligned narratives like this. gggrrggrgrgrrrr chewing on this blog like a chewtoy. i hope everyone gets worse and this whole blog blows up!!!!!!!

i can't stop giggling at ' its on a tadc tumblr ask blog of all things ' . this was really originally supposed to just be a silly blog with little story but here we are . you really won't get this anywhere else

i get pretty happy when someone dissects this silly thing so no need to apologize !! i'm my own harshest critic when it comes to this blog so it's often difficult for me to grasp what meaning people get out of this lol truly thank you guys for wanting to see my insane , Unhinged ideas come through

and i love the dissection on the mean anons - a lot of this thing hinges on actions having consequences after all ! every little thing will have an impact on ragatha's mental state . i'll say i think the anons have potential to not be as harmful - as there was a point in the blog's time where they acted more like inner therapists to ragatha than reality-bending beings of chaos ( good times ) . it just really depends on being patient with an actually mentally ill person like ragatha - it does fascinate me how people's frustration with her echoes real life mental health situations .

but yeah thanks !!! i'll be kissing this essay and pinning it on the refrigerator that i call my brain (:

[anemos-orca]

Xiao loves how you...

contains: No NSFW, fluffy only :D, gender neutral!reader x Xiao (no pronouns used), reader loves biology, not proof-read at all qwq

summary: The things you do that Xiao find so endearing about you :3

A/N: idrk what this is :x i guess a compilation of cute xiao thoughts? idk qwq lots of biology stuff because thats my thing •w• if you cant tell, i love xiao so much -w-

♥︎♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♥︎

Xiao would find it difficult to admit it out loud if you asked, but he couldnt get enough of you.

Xiao loved how passionate you were about your work and the things you loved, the way your enthusiasm guided your life and led you to be as sweet, caring, and compassionate as you were.

The way you got down to eye level with the dogs and cats in the harbor to say hello and pet them, even though doing such with every animal you passed made your trips take far longer than they realistically should.

The way your voice shrunk into a soft coo with the shy cats and grew into an ecsatic yip to rial up the dogs, talking to them like they could answer back.

The way you made an effort to memorize each of their names and the places they did and did not like to be pet, all to make them happy because, in your words, "They dont live all that long compared to us, so every bit of affection counts."

You were caring to all, so gentle and sweet, no matter who they were.

Xiao loved how expressive your face and body language were, and how each subtle movement betrayed your every emotion (even in times you didnt particularly want to be read like a book).

How you werent ever restless when you worked- he never failed to notice how you could sit for hours and study the behaviors of even the slowest, most boring koi in a pond without so much as a shifty-eyed glance of boredom. He could never sit and study things with you for the full amount of time because of how thurough you were.

He loved the way your nose scrunched up in disgust at the silliest things and how your eyes seemed to light up with excitement every time you saw something cool, even if it was just a pesky beetle that found its way onto the railing.

He loved the way you became so flustered every time he would so much as mention how adorable you looked when you were intruiged by something- especially when he caught you crouched down and wide-eyed as you watched a plant idly sway in the breeze, your attention so fixed on the sessile organism that you hadnt noticed Xiao kneeling down next to you. He tried to be sorry for startling you so badly that you fell onto your face, but it was hard to take you seriously when your cheeks were flushed such a bright red and you stammered over every word that fell from your lips.

Xiao couldnt get enough of how cute you were. If he truly wanted to, he could go on and on listing the adorable things you did, but he was the Conqueror of Demons, not the Conqueror of Having-A-Hard-Time-With-Expressing-Human-Emotions.

How you clutched that old, flattened koi plush close to your chest each night as you slept curled up in his arms. Even on the nights he couldnt join you as you fell asleep, he would come to your shared room at the Inn to check on you, comforted when he would find that you had fallen asleep wrapped around your plushie. He was always glad that you were fully asleep when he checked in on you because if you woke up from the hushed sound of his Wind-Cycle as he teleported into the room and saw him planting the most gentle of kisses to your lips, his one hand draped over your shoulder and the other cupping your cheek, he would be too embarrassed to even speak. You wouldnt tell him, but you secretly knew that he did this every night he couldnt be in bed with you.

He craved the way your face softened when you kissed him. He was addicted to it. The way you held his cheeks oh-so gently, your soft, warm hands keeping his mind steady as you leaned in and pressed such intimate little kisses all over his face. The way you paid special attention to his lips, knowing that he loved those kisses the most. After a long day of slaughtering countless demons, coming home to such soft and adorable mannerisms was all he wanted- and he got it every time.

He loved how adorable you looked when you cuddled him. He didnt get it at first, but after a few times, he found himself hungry for more and excitedly expecting it each night. He didnt know how you did it (and even thought it was some sort of demon-spell-trickery-hoopla at first), but now that he felt what it was to be held close, to be snuggled, to cuddle, he desired more and more each time. He loved the way you balled up in his arms on some nights and sloppily laid across his chest on others. He even loved how, when you were especially exhausted, you drooled on his shirt, leaving a wet, darkened mark that the other Adepti teased him about. He was once embarrassed about it, but after a moment of thought about how you were his only, your drool marks were his only, your sleepy face was his only, your love was his only, he wore your drool mark with pride every other night it happened from then on out. He was the only one who would ever have your drool, so that made it exclusive and special. No matter how much anyone envied the fact that he was the one who got to hold you in his arms while you fell asleep, they would never get to have you. You were his, and his only. Drool included.

Xiao loved you. All of you. And he would continue to do so forever, no matter what. Even if you scolded him (with the most endearing blush-covered cheeks, he'd like to add) for startling you and making you fall on your face. Even if you took an excessively long amount of time every trip to the harbor because you wanted to "catch up" with the animals. Even if you drooled on his shirt because of how tired you were. He was tough, callous, and sometimes even came across as cold or flat out rude to others, but knowing that you saw the real him, the Xiao no one else got to see, was enough to make him feel soft and fuzzy inside. And for that, he loved you very, very much.

♥︎♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♥︎

[xaeoism]

Muichiro helps you with small tasks when you're injured

"Done. Just remember not to do anything vigorous that may reopen the wound again", Shinobu said whilst finishing up on the bandaging of your hand. You looked at the clean new bandages that were neatly wrapped across your right hand and recalled the incident that had caused it to get injured in the first place - your sword broke in the middle of a fight with a demon and with no other weapons left to block its next attack, you put your hand in front of you and the demon's fangs sank straight through your flesh.

Great. Due to this injury, not only are you not able to train properly for a little more than a week but it would also hinder with your lifestyle and make simple tasks just so much more difficult than it should have been.

As you stepped into you and muichiro's shared estate you wondered if he was around to help you with some menial tasks but seeing as to how quiet the place was you assumed that he was out on another mission and decided to take a bath before making dinner for the two of you.

You stepped out of the shower feeling even more tired than you were when you went in due to the inability of your right hand. You then walked over to your dressing table and picked up the blow dryer to try and dry your hair before your shirt got drenched by it. As you turned the power for the dryer on, the dryer was gently taken from your hand.

Gentle teal eyes gazed into yours through the mirror as muichiro gathered some of your hair and started to help you blow them dry.

"I'll help you with that", he said, a small smile adorning his face.

"Ah muichiro you don't have to.."

"I want to.", he said firmly, locking eyes with you before his attention went back to your hair. You felt your cheeks starting to heat up as you stared at him combing through your hair with such gentility as though if he put too much pressure you'll break.

He noticed your staring but made no comments on it. He was too focused on the fragrance that your shampoo had left on your hair. After a few minutes, he combed through your hair for another time to make sure that your hair was no longer wet before placing the dryer on the table and turning the power off.

"Hey, I'm done", he said placing his hands on your shoulders.

This caused you to snap out of your daze; how long have you been staring?

"Thanks mui I really appreciate it", you replied, grabbing a rubber band before turning to him and flashing him a smile that made him feel warm inside. He looked at the band in your hand and took it from your hand again.

"Mui you have to stop doing that, and anyways I am more than capable of tying my hair up by myself. Its not even going to put any stress on my hand.", you groaned as you got up and tried to snatch the band back from his hand

"You are injured and I want you to get better as quickly as possible. So until then, I will help you with these small tasks whether you like it or not."

You sighed knowing there was no changing his mind due to how stubborn he was and sat back down.

"Do you even know how to tie another person's hair?", you questioned, trying to remember any instances where you have seen muichiro holding or using a hairband.

"I have not used one before.. but it cant be too hard"

He collected all your hair and bundled it together before using the band to hold it in place. You watched in amusement as his brows furrowed in concentration.

"Slaying demons are easier than this.. ", he mumbled to himself.

After he was done, you looked at your bun. Although it was very messy and had untied hair strewn about everywhere, the effort that he put in was evident and that made your heart flutter.

"Thank you mui. I'll cook dinner now to thank you for all the hard work you have done today hm?", you said while giving him a kiss on his cheek before dragging him out of the room towards the dining area. However he continued to follow you into the kitchen.

"I want to hel- "

"No mui. You have done more than enough for me today and I want to make this dinner to thank you for everything", you interrupted trying to make your stand clear by raising your tone.

"I must be a demon if I let the one I love do something like this by themself when they are injured, so no, we will make this dinner together", muichiro said gently grasping your hands while looking at you with nothing but love and adoration in his eyes. You couldn't find it in yourself to say no once more and sighed.

"Okay, let's start before you get your next mission"

[starclancy]

soulmate au! maybe imagine she works alongside the marines and the newspaper. she takes the bounty pictures! (I heard someone say this idea before, it sounds so good!) she hears about the chaos happening in Alabasta and she’s dispatched to go see what’s up (collect info for the paper, maybe snap a photo or two). That’s when she meets the strawhats, and in turn, zoro! she’s in shock. Zoro is in shock. The strawhats are in shock! Now imagine that she’s deeply loyal to the marines (maybe comes from a marine family like luffys). Not loyal that she’s mean and hostile as soon as she meets the pirates (I can imagine that it would make her job more difficult if so), but wary enough to everyone knows where her loyalties lie. I cant figure out what more to add to this, so I’d like to hear your thoughts!

Tysm for this ask I love it!!

~ Calming Melody ~

PAIRING: Reader/Zoro

CONTENTS: tbh idk

WORDCOUNT: 1578

Request status: Open (PLS)

The midday sun blazed mercilessly over the desert city of Alubarna, its golden sands shimmering like molten glass. Y/N adjusted the brim of her hat, squinting as she scanned the chaos through the lens of her camera. The reports had been right: Alabasta was a powder keg ready to explode. Crocodile and his Baroque Works agents were playing puppet masters, and the city was their stage. The Marines had sent her to document the unfolding events, but Y/N could already tell this was no ordinary mission.

From her perch on a crumbling rooftop, she watched as a group of figures dashed through the narrow streets below. Even without the distinctive hat, the rubbery limbs of the one in the lead gave him away: Monkey D. Luffy. The Straw Hat Pirates. Her orders were clear—document, don't engage—but curiosity tugged at her. Raising her camera, she adjusted the focus and began snapping shots.

The Straw Hats were nothing like she had expected. Their movements were coordinated, their resolve palpable. They weren't here for plunder; they were fighting for something bigger. But it wasn’t until her lens caught a glimpse of green that her hands faltered. A swordsman stood at the center of the action, his twin blades glinting in the sunlight as he struck down one of Crocodile’s lackeys. His focus was unshakable, his presence commanding—and when he glanced upward, their eyes locked.

It hit her like a thunderclap. Time seemed to slow as a surge of heat bloomed in her chest, her breath catching in her throat. Her hands trembled, the camera lowering slightly as she tried to process the wave of emotion washing over her. Zoro’s expression shifted, his brows furrowing in confusion as he stared back at her. She wasn’t sure how long they remained like that, caught in an invisible thread neither of them could untangle, before reality snapped back into focus.

“Zoro, what are you doing?” Luffy’s voice jolted him. The swordsman broke eye contact, his gaze darting to his captain.

“Nothing,” Zoro muttered, though his grip on his swords tightened. His gaze flickered back to the rooftop, but Y/N had already ducked behind cover, heart pounding in her chest.

“No way,” she whispered to herself, clutching her camera. Her rational mind tried to dismiss the moment as a fluke, but deep down, she knew better. The stories of soulmates—the unexplainable bond, the undeniable pull—weren't just tales for the superstitious. What just happened couldn’t be anything else.

She peeked over the edge again, watching as the crew regrouped. They were speaking hurriedly, though their words were lost in the cacophony of the battle around them. Her focus lingered on Zoro. He looked unsettled, his movements less fluid than before, as though something was weighing on his mind.

Her radio crackled to life. “Y/N, report. Do you have eyes on the Straw Hats?”

She hesitated. “Yes,” she replied, her voice steadier than she felt. “They’re… engaged with Baroque Works operatives. No sign of Crocodile yet.”

“Good. Keep your distance and continue to observe. HQ wants detailed intel on their movements.”

“Understood.”

She clipped the radio back to her belt, her mind racing. Her loyalty to the Marines had never wavered before. She came from a family steeped in service; her parents had devoted their lives to the cause of justice. Yet, as she watched the Straw Hats fight not for themselves but for the people of Alabasta, doubt began to creep in. These were not the bloodthirsty criminals her superiors painted them to be.

A sudden shout drew her attention. A group of Baroque Works agents had cornered the Straw Hats. Y/N’s fingers moved instinctively, snapping photos as the crew sprang into action. Zoro stepped forward, his swords gleaming as he prepared to take on the largest of the attackers. Despite herself, she couldn’t look away.

The fight was over in moments, Zoro emerging victorious. As the dust settled, he turned sharply, his eyes scanning the rooftops. When they landed on her, her heart skipped a beat. He didn’t say anything, but his expression spoke volumes: he’d seen her, and he wasn’t going to forget it.

“Hey, Zoro,” Luffy called, “who’s that?”

“No idea,” Zoro replied, though the look on his face betrayed him.

“She’s taking pictures,” Nami observed, her tone wary. “Could be a Marine.”

“She doesn’t look hostile,” Sanji chimed in, a flirtatious grin already forming. “Maybe she’s a fan of mine.”

“Idiot,” Zoro muttered, sheathing his swords. But he didn’t argue further. Instead, he kept his eyes on the rooftop where she stood, an unspoken challenge in his gaze.

Y/N’s grip tightened on her camera. She knew she should leave, retreat to a safe distance and radio in her findings. Yet something rooted her to the spot. For the first time in her career, her duty to the Marines felt at odds with something deeper, something she didn’t fully understand yet. One thing was certain: this was far from over.

The Straw Hats moved quickly, disappearing into the labyrinth of Alubarna’s streets. Y/N let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. She needed to get back to her base of operations and figure out her next steps.

But the connection lingered. The way Zoro had looked at her, the way her heart had seemed to recognize him—it all felt too real. Too personal.

By the time she descended from the rooftop, the streets had quieted somewhat, though tension still hung heavy in the air. Her camera bag bounced against her hip as she made her way through the alleys, careful to avoid drawing attention. She needed to think, to process everything that had just happened.

Her radio crackled again. “Y/N, update. What’s your position?”

“Heading back to base,” she replied. “The Straw Hats are moving through the city. I’ll upload photos and notes shortly.”

“Roger that. Keep an eye out for Crocodile’s movements. We’ll need your intel to plan our next move.”

“Understood,” she said, her voice steady despite the storm of emotions beneath the surface.

As she rounded a corner, her thoughts were interrupted by a voice.

“Hey, you.”

She froze, her hand instinctively going to her camera. Turning slowly, she found herself face-to-face with none other than Zoro. He stood a few paces away, his swords still at his sides but his presence no less imposing.

“You’ve been following us,” he said, his tone low and even. “Why?”

Y/N’s mind raced. She couldn’t reveal her ties to the Marines, not yet. “I’m a photographer,” she said carefully. “I document stories. And you… you’re part of one.”

He didn’t look convinced. “That so?”

“Yes,” she said, meeting his gaze despite the nervous flutter in her chest. “You’re fighting against Crocodile, aren’t you?”

Zoro’s eyes narrowed. “What’s it to you?”

She hesitated, choosing her words carefully. “I want to know the truth. And I think you do too.”

For a moment, neither of them spoke. The weight of the moment hung between them, the unspoken connection thrumming like a heartbeat.

Finally, Zoro sighed. “Stay out of the way,” he said, turning to leave. “And don’t do anything stupid.”

The final confrontation with Crocodile was a maelstrom of chaos. Y/N had tried to keep her distance, sticking to the outskirts of the battle to capture the truth on film. But when the Straw Hats engaged Baroque Works’ forces with unrelenting determination, she found herself drawn closer, her camera forgotten as the fight reached its peak.

The palace was in shambles. Crocodile stood in the center of the destruction, his confidence unshaken even as Luffy challenged him with fiery resolve. Y/N could only watch, torn between her Marine training and the undeniable bravery of the Straw Hats.

When Crocodile unleashed a devastating sandstorm toward the group, Y/N’s body moved on instinct. She sprinted forward, throwing herself into the fray to pull a wounded civilian out of harm’s way. She didn’t even register the danger she was in until she felt a strong grip on her arm, yanking her back to safety.

It was Zoro.

“Are you insane?” he barked, his face inches from hers. “You’re going to get yourself killed!”

“I couldn’t just stand there,” she shot back, her voice trembling.

He stared at her, his expression a mix of exasperation and something she couldn’t quite place. “You’re either the bravest Marine I’ve met or the dumbest. Maybe both.”

Before she could respond, Luffy let out a triumphant yell. The battle had shifted. With one final, earth-shaking blow, Crocodile was defeated, and the nightmare that had gripped Alabasta came to an end.

The Straw Hats departed Alabasta quietly, slipping away before the Marines could arrive in full force. Y/N stood on the docks, watching their ship fade into the horizon. Her camera hung around her neck, but she hadn’t taken a single photo of their departure.

She felt a presence beside her and turned to see Tashigi, her superior officer. “You didn’t report everything you saw, did you?” Tashigi asked, her tone neutral.

Y/N hesitated, then shook her head. “No. Not everything.”

Tashigi’s gaze lingered on her for a moment before she nodded. “Sometimes justice isn’t as black and white as we’re taught.”

As the Marine ships arrived to restore order, Y/N’s thoughts remained with the Straw Hats, particularly Zoro. The connection they’d felt—brief but undeniable—left her questioning everything she’d believed.

She didnt know what to do next.

[zachfoxx121]

Okay so I really really really like Russell Adler

Here are some of my favourite headcannons for him. (Featuring other cold war characters)

Alright so first up is his past!! Bro was born in 1937, between WW1 and WW2. He knows both German and Russian, so I like to think either his mom or dad (hell, maybe both) are immigrants from around those areas of Europe. To push that, his file doesn't say where he was born, just the date he was born. And a language is arguably easier learned if its in a household than in a book. Pronunciation and all that. Maybe his parents/one of them were Jewish too, and thats why they immigrated to the USA? It's also debatable if he was even born in the USA, since as I before mentioned, his birthplace isn't filed.

This headcannon is kinda borrowed, I cant remember who I original saw say it, but due to Adler's scar he has trouble/can't smile. It happened after 1968, but before 1981. When you ask him how he got his scar, he doesn't give a truthful answer, like Parks had said. "Oh I had trouble with a girl," "missed and fell," or "a tiger got me." My biggest guess, just from how it looks like a shrapnel wound, is its probably embarrassing. I like to think it was from a mine, maybe even a helicopter accident. But due to its position, it mightve damaged some facial muscles, and makes it hard to upturn a side/both sides of his lips. With scars, depending on how deep, nerve endings get fucked up and make it hard to move certain muscles, yknow?

This ones a bit silly, and has to do with Bell (I always play Bell as male, so sorry if I say "he" instead of "they" as their pronoun.) because I'm such a sucker for their relationship. Since Bell just kinda gets dumped on him, and their about the same build/height, I like to imagine he just dumps all his old/unwanted clothes into Bell's closet. In his file people he works with have described him as fashionable, and I don't know how good he gets paid, so he might go through clothes pretty fast to keep up with the times.

(Also for fem Bell, I imagine it's the same as this but with Park's old/unwanted clothes.)

Building on that, hes probably fashionable so wherever he is he doesn't seem out of place. With his scar it may be a bit difficult to blend in, but if he wears stylish enough clothes thats probably what grabs people attention more. "That guy had such a nice jacket," "did you see his shoes?" Even the difference between his '81 look and his new '91 do good to show his ability to keep up with fashion.

This headcannon is a bit more for Bell, but depending on which occupation you give them (CIA, MI6, ex-KGB) I like to imagine thats the accent they have post brainwash. With CIA, he has Adler's accent, and MI6 he copies Park's. With ex-KGB just a russian accent, which would probably be more realistic since it can be difficult to literally change an accent, but bro was experimented on so much it could have!!

I mention Adler in that because I like thinking of Bell saying a word and everyone being like "why'd they say it like Adler", because even in the USA theres so many accents!! Like even Mason and Woods have slightly different accents, especially if you think about the og voices in bo1.

This headcannon is a bit sad (and a big spoiler for the end of the "Good Ending"). After Adler shoots Bell, I think he stayed to make sure Bell was really dead. To make sure they bled out. In that though, I think he let Bell have one of his cigs, even smoked with him while he died. "Least I can do for you, kid." He didn't let Bell die alone. I really think it was hard for him to kill Bell, but he just had to shut the feeling down because it was (most likely) an order. Even though its probably more likely he shot Bell in the head, better than Arash did.

Anywho thats all I feel like typing out rn have fun with these some of them are constantly playing in my head!!!! :)))

[saturnxlust]

HEYYY :P ik its been awhile my bad😔

Injured!Proxys+ben x Doctor! Reader

Tim Wright/ Masky

So this man is closed off, all of the proxys are😞

But hes not a idiot, he knows when his body has had enough and when he needs help

The only way you’d be able to help him is if its a severe wound or if your close with him

Im talking at least 2+ years of either dating or being friends..

Lucky you if you’ve made it this long!

Now actually helping him is difficult

Hes stubborn and doesnt like to admit hes in pain so when you stitch his sorry ass up or disinfect it, he winces but swears hes fine

Hes not fine

He also complains the entire time about how he could do it himself

Knowing full well he couldnt he just likes to be a pain in the ass

Brian Thomas/hoodie

Hes more lenient, he’ll let you help him even though we all know this man could do it himself

It wouldnt be good but as long as he isnt bleeding out he doesnt really care

Although hes the more lenient one hes still closed off and it takes atleast a year or more to be able to help him

The first time you actually clean up a wound he falls deeper in love

Its not covered in dried blood or anything!

Hes amazed at how gentle you were and found it cute if you were concerned about him

It gets to the point where he would make small bruises or cuts just to have you put a little bandaid on his finger or put pain cream on his bruise

He would totally make you kiss the bandages after, no matter how big or small😭

He has dinosaur bandaids and unicorn bandaids.

Toby Rogers

Oh boy buckle up

So he cant feel pain

Good luck☺️

He doesnt know hes hurt and most likely you wont either

If you somehow get him to wash his fuckass sweatshirt and seem to see a wound, he too, would be confused and surprised

He would find how concerned you were funny and laugh as you clean him up

If you yelled at him while he laughed he’d tell you to relax and that hes fine

Hes not fine

Like brian he would make small cuts and or bruises to have you patch him up

Back tracking a little, it would take a few months but not because hes closed off

He trusts you completely to not hurt him physically

It was just getting to see him without his sweatshirt on that was difficult

He keeps that thing on all the time no way your getting a peak at his scrawny ass unless you rip that sweatshirt off him or if you get…spicy.. with him..

Eyeless Jack

HAH

Good luck

He went to medical school

This man knows what hes doing

But like the others finds it funny that you want to help him

He doesnt need it but honestly

Hes too smart to get too badly injured, if he does it’s because he went awhile wothout eating and became reckless

I think that if he were to go more then a fee weeks without eating he would get reckless with how he got the kidneys

He wouldnt leave the victims alive and leave them in their bed naked with incisions on their stomach

When that happens he usually comes home with a bruise or scratches from the victims fighting back,

If you’ve gotten to the point that you know about that and accept it, not only will you be helping clean him up

You’d help clean his clothes up

Hes a clean guy dont get me wrong but after eating i think he would just need to sleep

And if your like me theres no way that 7’ tall demon is getting in my bed soaked in blood and possible guts ☺️

Jeffery Hodek

God i wish you luck if your with this man

He will let his wounds get infected for fun and he will enjoy it when you get upset (COUGH COUGH MOUTH CUTS COUGH)

He honestly couldnt care less and again, finds it amusing when you yell at him

Lets be honest his story is written awful so im gonna tweak it a litte

He did not get bleached, there was a explosion and some of his hair burnt off, it has since grown back a little but the burn scars are still there

So if you want to help him clean his mouth he’ll complain and tease you and taunt you but he’ll let you do it

..if you even want to after all that.😒

Benjamin Lawman

So he can’t actually get hurt…i mean unless hes like a zombie but he isnt, this guys a ghost

So i mean, unless he has some power to be human magically theres really nothing that can hurt him

Even you..

But you should find a way to hurt him, whether it be physical or emotional causr hes a jackass

And will make fun of you just to see you cry😒

Either bring up something from his past(he might get a little angry at that🥰) or threaten to throw him into a lake

You can’t actually throw him but..he..doesnt need to know that😇

[beefboyandbabygirl]

this is my first (1st!!) ever request so im sorry if im not clear or if anything is too vague.. </3 just had a thought about virgin!svt member (any one of your choice) x experienced but shy reader?? like they usually tease each other like crazy and reader is kind of cocky and all bratty (basically all talk) but when it comes to actual sex they're unexpectedly crazy shy and the member just 😞😞 cant get enough... im just curious about how you'd write the dynamic :) it can be vice versa as well! feel free to write about whoever comes to mind when you read this!

- anon 🐱❤️

oh my gooood im so honored to be ur first request hihi <3 i hope u like it!!

Show me how

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

pairing: seungkwan x fem!reader

genre: smut, first time, fluffish

warnings: unprotected sex, handjob, mentions of oral, kissing, mentions of making out, veryyyy slight degredation, mentions of restraint, mentions of masturbation

beefboy quotes: "kitten wants seungkwans cock🤧" (im sorry for including this but it made me laugh) "IM WET".

wordcount: 1k

a/n: phew this was a difficult one. im practising writing more detailed smut and do a little less plot lmao. beefboy says its working so im going to trust i did okay haha.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why this is happening right now.” 

What you had told Seungkwan was true. You were fairly experienced when it came to sex. However, experienced didn’t exactly equate to confident, even though you might have given him that idea. And it wasn’t on purpose. It wasn’t like you had tried to fool him, or pretend you were something you weren’t. All the dirty secrets whispered to make him blush, the not-so-accidental brushes of your ass over his crotch or fingers over his chest, were done out of pure love and adoration. You liked to tease him, and he absolutely loved when you teased him. 

You just wanted his first time to be special, and now you were afraid it was all ruined. 

“No, why are you apologizing? You’re doing great.”

He was laid out beneath you, already all sweaty and glowy from the heavy makeout session that had prompted the current situation. A large hand gently came in touch with one of the thighs straddling his torso, silently saying it’s okay, we’re okay. And his pupils were all blown out, and the room was dimly lit and humid. It was beautiful and perfect. He was perfect, and you were ruining it. 

It all felt completely upside down to you. That he was giving the reassuring words and the calming touches when he was supposed to be the nervous one. He didn’t look nervous at all. He sported that confident smile, the inquiring tilt of his head and he was shirtless underneath your bare thighs. 

“I just feel like I've let you down. Like I made you expect all these things for tonight, that I was supposed to be all dominating, and sexy and what not-”

“Babe, you’re literally so fucking sexy.” 

“Oh yeah, suddenly having a mental breakdown in the middle of your boyfriend's first time. So sexy of me.”

Without replying he grabbed you by the hips, giving them a gentle squeeze and locking eyes with you for permission. Your ‘yes’ was barely a whisper. Slowly, he shuffled you further down his body, so you were positioned over his cock. His hard cock. Really hard and also, really big. Not that you were surprised. 

“You feel that?” 

None of you were even moving, not even the slightest, and yet sparks of pleasure were rushing through you. He could probably feel the wetness soaking through your panties and onto the fabric covering his hard dick, but for the first time that night, you didn’t care. You didn’t care that you were nervous, you didn’t feel like you had a single expectation to live up to or promise to fulfill. He was hard, and you had barely done anything, which made you both incredibly relieved and wet. 

“M-mhm…”

When he noticed how your shoulders suddenly dropped and your jaw unclenched, he too felt all his muscles loosen up and a held back sigh escaped him. 

“You did that baby, made me so hard. Because you’re so sexy, and beautiful and hot-”

“Okay okay, I get it.” Your attempt at shutting him up was to lean down for a kiss, but he just continued to ramble and mumble onto your lips, and you realized you shouldn’t keep him waiting much longer. 

“Can I take these off?” You asked, your voice quiet as it spilled onto his lips while your fingers hooked onto the waistband of his boxers. 

“Yes, f-fuck, please.”

Before you could even have the chance though, he was ripping them off himself, so you instead took the opportunity to take your panties off, leaving you both fully naked.

“How- How do you want me?”

His question barely registered with you as his dick entered your line of sight. You had seen each other naked a few times, sure, but only for short moments while changing clothes or walking in on the other showering. Now his dick was so up close you could see every vein, every drop of precum leaking down his shaft, and you hadn’t even noticed you were practically laying on your stomach, crosseyed and nearly drooling at the sight. 

“Don’t look at it like that.” 

His voice snapped you out of your cockdrunk trance and you somehow managed to tear your eyes away from his cock. 

“I’m just admiring it.”

“Yeah, I can tell, but please don’t look at it like that for much longer, or I’ll actually cum untouched.”

You giggled lowly before crawling further up his body again. Your noses were touching and his heavy breaths tickled your lips as your hand dragged over his nipples, down his abs until it reached his cock. 

“That’d be so hot”, you whispered. Your boyfriend let out a breathy whimper in return, one you so badly wanted to hear again, so you wrapped your fingers tightly around his cock, squeezing until he was throbbing so hard you could have been convinced it was his heartbeat going straight into his dick. 

“You like the sound of that? I could touch myself in front of you, have you tied to the bed so you can’t touch me yourself, see how long you’ll last…”

He was already close. Embarrassingly close, but what was he supposed to do? For weeks before you asked him out he would simply think of something gross, like Vernons three week old laundry or the floor in the subway, whenever he accidentally popped a boner around you. But now, that was actually impossible. He couldn’t think, couldn’t see, couldn’t feel anything but you everywhere, in every corner of his mind. 

“Please, I’m so close…” The way your hand alternated between squeezing him at the base and going up and down in a fast motion, was making him dizzy. 

“I know, I know. You’ll get what you want”, your hand let go of his cock, as you resumed your position from a few moments ago, straddling him, but now with no layers of fabric between you. Your pussy radiated actual heat, and occasionally a drop of your wetness would fall onto his abs and trickle down towards his v-line, and if he didn’t get your pussy around him now he would probably faint. 

“Remind me what it is you want again?” 

This wasn’t your usual teasing. Even though your words were bratty as always, they were now laced with something different, something loving. You were smiling adoringly and your eyes were sparkling, and even though you were being so cruel, you were still so doting. 

“I Want…Want your pussy. Need it.”

You rewarded his answer with a quick kiss, before lining your entrance up with his cock and sinking down slowly. Seungkwans facial expression twisted into one of pleasure and he was muttering profanities into the air. 

“Feel okay?”

He felt more than okay. He had never felt better, but if you began to move even a single inch, he would cum, and he didn’t wanna be that guy. 

“Yeah- Yeah I’m fine just, fuck, give me a second…”

“Hm? But I thought this was what you wanted?”

Seungkwan knew you weren’t actually denying his request. You weren’t moving, and you wouldn’t unless he wanted you to. You were testing him. You had a goal, and once you went for something, there was no way Seungkwan could convince you otherwise. 

“I do! I do, I just don’t wanna-”

“But I do.” 

Your hips began to swivel back and forth on top of him. The subtle movement would have been barely noticeable had he not been so sensitive. 

“You can cum Seungkwan, it’s okay. I want it.”

When he didn’t argue further, when he looked at you with pleading eyes, you kept going, escalating the speed of your hips more and more, until your boyfriend was a wonderful mess underneath you, writhing and moaning desperately. 

“Cum for me, Seungkwan.”

Your words were the last tug pulling at the knot in his stomach. He was releasing inside of you, coating your walls in white and tensing every muscle in his body. It was only after the fact he got to see it, his eyes struggling to open from how tight they were shut, and once they landed on his cum dripping down your plush thighs onto his stomach it was as if the high just kept running through him. 

“Should I- Can I try to eat you out? Can you show me how?”

You hadn’t had expectations of cumming tonight. This was about him. That being said, you were hardly surprised that he wanted to return the favor, selfless as always.  

Your mind wandered to just a few moments ago, when you were so worried about ruining this moment. About making him uncomfortable, or doing something wrong, or not living up to his expectations. Now you were realizing that this hadn’t been about expectations at all. It had been about trust. Seungkwan trusted you enough to be his first. To show him how. 

And there was nothing more sexy than being trusted.