#and it feels draining tbh
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growing up is realizing that nothing can match the level of annoyance one experiences from having a hobby-less friend
#my best friend is this way#she just plays overwatch loudly in the middle of the night and avoids doing her assignments#and she complains sometimes about not having any friends but like girl#go to club meetings#join a sport#start a blog#it’s not very hard to make friends if you actually just put yourself out there#but she literally thinks that it won’t work even if she hasn’t tried yet so she gives up before even doing anything#and it feels draining tbh#all of my friends have to be her friends#and lowkey sometimes i just want my friends that i went out and met myself to be my friends only#i just hate that we kind of have to do everything together for her sake#so i’m like girl get a hobby#and she refuses
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Danny keeps telling heros his tragic backstory buts just ripped from an old game no one really remembers that he liked. That or an old cartoon he watched as a kid.
Example: One day I just woke up and had this strange pink mark on my leg. I was freaking out but then started noticing all this stuff I could do. All of a sudden I liked fish? And these men would keep popping up and telling me I had to fight monsters. Telling me i was picked for it. I got this neat pendent though.
The league have no idea hes bsing them. But eventually he keeps getting closer and closer to the characters story that someone will figure it out. And I like to think it’s Redhood or Flash and no I wont explain why because if you know you know.
Bonus points if Danny switches it up like once he finishes telling the characters full backstory. Maybe it can become a game with him and the others. Who can guess his reference the fastest. Batman is not amused
#danny phantom#danny fenton#dpxdc#dp x dc#batman#liz is doing crossovers again#im just sitting in the bathtub tbh like I just finished draining the water but im not ready to exit the bathroom yet#so im just chillin cold and naked in the tub#maybe ill kick the shower on and be warm again#im probably gonna get sick from this#I do everytime I let myself dripdry after a bath#my head even feels too hot#teehee#im so silly and sickly
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Just a heads up, I might open commissions soon since I'll need extra budget for the next month! I know I still have a backlog of ko-fi doodles I need to work on but I'll try my best to do them alongside the comms 😤💪💪💪
#i wasn't able to do much of the doodles bc of art block this past few weeks 😔#tbh I feel like my current workspace is draining so I feel like having a portable device to use for art might help me to be more productive#been thinking of saving up for a tablet so I could work anywhere & anytime i wanted to#I see a lot of ppl use ipad + procreate but apple products are super expensive sooo i'll probably just go for a samsung tab#i've heard the s series work well for drawing? like s6 / s7?#tho I just might go for s9 fe instead since that's the newer version#if you guys have any recommendations abt what tab is good for drawing (that's also budget friendly) pleeeease let me know#i'd really appreciate it!! tysm ;w;#bam blabs
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Slow writers of tumblr: has anyone figured out The Key to not comparing yourself to your peers who hit massive word counts daily? Or is this something we all struggle with together?
#kaitlyn talks for once#writeblr#writblr#writers of tumblr#writing#I’d be okay either one tbh#i just. would love to be able to support my productive friends while not feeling like shit and being jealous and hating myself#please#if anyone found the key#tell me#I’d be alright with support too#it’s just hard#you know?#rough to deal with#the jealousy. i want to be supportive without hating myself#is there a way?#i’m desperate#please just tell me what to do to stop hating myself and I will#i don’t know.#maybe I’m just hungry and tired and drained. it’s been a long day and I haven’t eaten anything#maybe tomorrow will be better
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in a perpetual state of "???" because aside from some mild tenderness and pinches here and there from the drain tubes stitched into my sides, recovery has been maybe a one to three on the pain scale thus far.
don't get me wrong here i am TREMENDOUSLY grateful that my recovery has been largely pain-free, but i am just sO SUSPICIOUS that it has been so!!!! surely my pain tolerance cannot be so great!!!
#we're on day 7 now#drains are still in and so shifting and moving is a little cumbersome but#it feels like any other day tbh#i have been zipped into a tank binder since last friday and it's been leagues comfier than binding pre-op!!!#top surgey journey
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ngl i just wanna archive this blog 🧎🏽♀️
#sttoru chats.#it’s been on my mind fr#like i don’t find any joy in writing anymore tbh 😭 it feels like so much energy is being drained from me when i write#like for the past two to four months#i have to force myself to find motivation#i dont wanna deactive bcs my fics are gnna get deleted and i dont have em saved anywhere#i wanna quit tumblr#its just so egh#i have a life to focus on#and then theres ppl who ask me for a part 2 in my inbox continously or wjo remind me of old drafts#im TIRED MAN
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Found this on twitter. I don't… really know what to say.
a confession from one of the type of people that harass darkfic authors on ao3:
a reminder I guess, to kudos and comment supportive things to your favorite authors
#it's like reading this drained me of all energy tbh#like i can't even be angry i can't feel anything at all#wondering what the few people who see this might feel#ao3 writer#anti harassment#anti anti#proship#pro fiction#pro ship#proshippers please interact
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wao... the real herta herself? in the flesh and everything. what the fuck
#i like her hat#2.6 LOOKS FUN TBH i love astral express trio shenanigans. date night on penacony gone wrong (not clickbait)#i'm very drained from mizu5 chaos but i am excited... vasha rerun too :D!!!!!#i wish rappa's concept wasn't torn between like 5 different things because i get the feeling her Character will be enjoyable#like she's just so messy. hard to like... get behind her. and invested. it's off-putting#i think just the street artist theme would have been fine...????? but someone on the team HAD to say No that's Too Boring#and now we have . whatever that is
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Anyone else think short form social media based on algorithms designed to promote topics that create more engagement instead of more joy, the idea of fast fashion but conveyed through social media, and the fact you can monetize suffering and outrage better than ever has largely resulted in the death spiral of media literacy and the mass emergence of bad faith readings?
#I may be venting a lil but god it blows my mind#fyp is a blessing and a curse because i don't think ppl were ever meant to be subjected to this many ppl at once#god i took a bird site hiatus for weeks and now BARELY check it and it already feels like a hit#oughhhhh#even fandom spaces have hugely incorporated marketing and networking into them bc of cmms and sponsorship and building portfolio#which would be fine tbh if it weren't for the way socmed is designed#now it's like you can't support too many ppl or else you're shadow banned or you have to make yourself palatable and marketable#and websites with threads in which people will only read the first post before qrting because ratios are seen as five minutes of fame#features that permit beating an algorithm are locked behind a paywall that promises you money if you go viral#and what goes viral is usually incendiary content meant for those ratios or trends. whether for or against OP#even in hobbyist spaces the climate has changed so much due to the monetization and marketing and just. ugh#not to mention side accounts dedicated to gossip in this new priv account culture like...idk#if you have to make another account so you can make fun of a friend on main with selected priv friends it just doesn't sit well with me#and not every priv account does this but enough do and it makes me tired#unsolicited hate comments are still as bad as they used to be on ff dot net except now people openly are proud of it more#why do most socmed feel like passive aggressive sticky notes on high school lockers#there is so much more I could say about everything that has left me weary about the internet but I don't know the time or place#and I don't want anyone to think this is about them because it's a general statement. though if you are doing the more inflammatory things.#maybe rethink that. it's not good for anyone else and it's not good for you either#I keep coming back online to check on ppl and see art and I *know* it's draining for my health every time#but I feel a lot better now that i use socmed less overall. and that I try to focus on what makes me happy#it just sucks seeing so many people i care about endure absolutely wild struggles bc people online do not care.#I like rambling in my tags because this is the only place I ramble except my personal journal and to my wife
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tomorrow is my first day back to work and I'm a lil nervous
I haven't been able to get anything written for here bc I've been trying to get a couple other things written (updating my Bill Cipher redemption fic and starting a Gyutaro x reader x Daki because I make poor life choices)
but I'm on light duty for a month, basically just sitting at the register checking people out, unable to do any stocking or anything bc I'm not allowed to lift anything over 15 pounds so I can't lift totes, bend much, or reach much, so I'm allowed to bring something to do in between customers... maybe I'll get some writing done? I feel as if I'll be slacking off bc that's how my brain works
but you know what, I kill myself for that store normally, I don't work full time simply because I can't afford medical insurance if I did, but even working only part time I give my all while I'm there, I'm not someone who slacks off. so if I'm healthfully and approvedly permitted to slack off and take it easy for a month, I guess I'll take it (... plus, I mean, I'll still be working, just light duty, it's not like I'll show up and get paid to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, I'm still gonna be ringing out customers)
ANYWAY MY POINT IS-
get those last requests in! after I get home from work tomorrow, I'll be closing the askbox and won't open it back up till this batch is finished and I swear I mean that this time 😂
#mod post#should I have ordered Jessii Vee merch knowing I am not getting paid for two weeks bc I didn't work for two weeks ? maybe not#BUT DAMMIT THIS IS WHY I HAVE SAVINGS#'weirdness all the way ' button and YANA 'be kind' button and squishy pink gummi bear COME TO ME#... been uh. been doing a lot of impulse online shopping while I've been sitting at home bc idk it scratches a certain itch in my brain#and my mama has been nice enough to be buying most of my food when I usually buy my own just bc it's hard for me to walk around much rn#but I'm feeling a lot better physically I just get tired easily so hopefully I'm gonna be back to buying my own food soon#like I appreciate everything my mom and lil bro have been doing for me but MAN I don't like being UNABLE to do shit myself you know?#I took a shower this morning and it exhausted me and Mom had to be in there to help me the whole time in case I lost my balance or smth#it's better than it was the first week but I still hate feeling like I've temporarily lost some of my independence#I can't wait to shower by myself again and for it not to drain me#which is such a small thing to want and miss but like#OKAY TAG RANT OVER THIS RECOVERY IS JUST DRAGGING#I'm getting old tbh that's what it is I'm 30 and don't bounce back like I used to 😂😂😂😂
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I should stfu abt it but truly my sister's fiance is such an immature bad person and she should break up w him in my humble opinion like I Want her to get married and be happy but he's a walking talking red flag literally astonishing how bad he is under the guise of introverted shy nerd uwu
#puts insane expectations on her such as: looking flawless but also never making any effort to look good because that's so 'shallow'#studying 24/7 for literally no logical reason like she has a full time job she's gonna start a masters in October why the fuck would she#study now???#points out any 'flaw' in her and then tells her she's disappointing his expectations#wants to talk to her 24/7 and lashes out whenever she doesnt#is broke so she's paying much more than she should tbh .#but also makes her feel guilty abt it because he's insecure???#criticises her whenever she has any body hair because he's a fucking CHILD .#idfk what she sees in him it's driving me crazy#he literally made her a shell of her former self because of how draining and overwhelming and demanding he is#and she KNOWS but she's actively ignoring it#whatever the fuckkkkk
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it is now officially the 25th which means...
merry christmas everyone !!! regardless of whether u celebrate or not, i hope u all have a lovely day with whoever u spend it with or with urself <33
#sophie's idle chatter#this is scheduled so im HOPING it posts at 12 am.... prays....#i havent been super active in the past month or two bc life is kicking my ass (<- has said this countless times already but its still true)#also !! i see asks and ill try and answer them when i actually have the time and energy 😭 ik i say this a lot but ive been drained good god#(not so) mini life updates :#the new lovebrush chronicles main story update has made me weep so much... ive done both clarence and ayns routes and....#my god.... this story is darker and honestly im loving it AND i love how they did the chara roles in this world (alkaid... ourgh...)#my tear glands arent tho bc ayn ending 3.... what the fuck was that i couldnt sleep after doing that ending??? ITS WAS SO SAD AND FOR WHATF#currently having to wait until the 27th so i can do lars route 😔#the recent ep of apothecary diaries.... ourgh my heart.... jinshi and maomao beloveds :((#oh !! and ive gotten back into my ace of diamonds/daiya no ace phase and have been rewatching the series...#sobbing chris and yuki and miyuki my beloveds.... kissing ur foreheads and holding u gently.....#the way i got back into it bc im catching up on s2 of a clean sweep (a korean baseball variety show that i love with all my heart ;w;)#my mum is a traitor tho bc she watched every new ep that came out on tuesdays while i was in uni 🧍♀️ so now im catching up on the 30 eps#on my own 🧍♀️#OMG AND ALSO DR STONE S3??? WHY WAS I NOT NOTIFIED THAT PART 1 CAME OUT MONTHS AGO AND PART 2 WAS MORE RECENT???#i havent been doing that much writing recently tho bc the fingers wont type but the brain is exploding with ideas i cannot handle this#i do want to get back to the haitham sxf series tho.... and also my oc various x reader series.......#tbh ive been contemplating abt publishing the haitham series on ao3 once i write more chapters before publishing them#idk i feel like the series would be nice to have on ao3 as well as tumblr JHDG#thats abt it i think?#anywho if u read this far then know i am giving u a warm cookie as a condolence prize for getting through this life dump <33#ill leave it off here but i hope u all have a lovely day !! mwah mwah merry chrysler everyone 🎄🫶#queue... ueueue
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now that im off medication im starting to feel human again, today has been the best day of recovery thus far!!!
#i get this drain removed tomorrow morning too so im expecting that to feel unpleasant but then i can sleep in a bed again hopefully!!#and in abt a week i should be able to shower again which oh my god i want to shower so so so bad x __x#i caaan shower but im too chicken of fucking smthing up tbh#im 5 years old
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🏡
#Feeling absolutely emotionally drained by Stupid Adult Decisions that have to be made#wandering ghost-like through my day#holding it together while having been on the verge of losing it for months on end#meanwhile Young Miss throws a tantrum because she didn't get the breakfast cereal she wants#and yeah that approach looks like it has some merits tbh
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Btw sorry but unfortunately my mind is currently trapped between Shame™️ (over existing. Fuck being so socially anxious-) and Guilt✨️✨️(not doing said things) and Tireddddd (everything irl)-
Plus mother has decided to be extra homophobic nd shit the last couple days, and apparently me nd her *alone* r going to a fair together tmrw so. If I'm not responding 2 anything that is specificly plot/heavy/have to be somewhat mentally aware 4,, I'm sorry nd ill (probably. Hopefully??) be back on Saturday.
#last time we went to a fair i got so socially drained so fast and she did Not appreciate ut#im sorry i cant handle being around large groups of ppl irl ???!??? just bcs i didnt talk to ppl however does not mean i did nto feel on the#edge of panicking the whole fucking time tho.#anyways rip volomteering 2day and then this tmrw if i end up vent posting again heres the context lol???#T.T#godddddddd fuck this tbh- i love fairs (or used to??) but the last few times I've gone have all just been. so shit.#i miss the adrenaline highs of rides without the panic attack(s) of being pickpocketed and the saddness of being exluded nd shit#plus the always present#yk shame of Existing in a piblic place. which tbf has gotten better receney but. idk.#also whoop whoop if i hear her start talkimg homophobic nd transphobic shit ahain this week i might just. cry?#(wont do that actually because fuck crying infront of her she just yells nd now i dont cry infront of ppl but still-)#oh god this is so much vent in the tags rip-#enea rambles <3#:3#eneas poor mental health jumpscare :]#tw homophobia
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Yes, I know I’ve already made it abundantly clear that I liked chapter 3
No, I will not shut the fuck up about it. Ever.
#gonna use the tags to ramble abt how i designed sammy rq#(SPOILERS AHEAD)#i imagined she had much shorter hair both before the apocalypse and before she and scout ran away with their friends#i imagined she did occasionally give herself haircuts while living in the van#and then completely stopped cutting it after otto locked her scout ryan and dave in the van for 2 years#i feel like she was too drained to do anything at that point and just let her hair grow out#also added a scar underneath her chin because of how she was described as ‘accident prone (but not in the cute way)’#also gave her dimples. no reason :] (tbh i don’t think it’s pretty clear here but they are there)#i might draw scout soon who knows. might do that as an excuse to draw expressions#i can’t not with him. after all him being full of expression is pretty important in the chapter#charlie stfu#digital doodles#revelator posting#litwtc#life in the world to come#revelator#litwtc revelator#litwtc fanart#chris dunne#will wood
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