#and instead of lesbians they’re gay

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

Nearly finished with the FNAF movie novelisation and I’m telling you, Mike is absolutely infatuated with Vanessa, he wants to kiss her so bad-

To be fair I don’t blame him

[snowberry-pie]

not personally super into datv’s companion sexuality approach but whatever. we press on

[heartz4shauna]

i was explaining the verger lore to my mom at dinner (which she did not want to hear) and i said “and margot is a lesbian so” and my mom said “like clarice” YES!! LIKE CLARICE!!

[incorrectrockyandshockyquotes]

Oliver: Would you be mad if I just used the argument “I’m allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian”?

Betty: Never. I’m proud to help you win arguments.

[unlimitedbutchworks]

to date i still think that one of the most potently, concentratedly tumblr things still visible on this site is the bizarrely common view that you have to coddle detransitioners or you’re evil or pushing them to the right or whatever. idk if gay people ever talked about ex-gays like this and i think it’s a consequence of a vibes based “everyone is valid” politic being centered on. like tme ppl hear detransitioners go on about how their gender as a #gendernonconformingfemale is never respected and take this seriously instead of as obvious dogwhistles because they can’t or don’t want to imagine other transmasculine people leveraging their gender for clout for shitheads. if you heard a self identified ex-gay talking to christians about how cultish and dangerous it was being with gay people you would not take any of that shit to heart but it’s different for some reason when it’s cryptoterfs and we have to be gentle and sweet and welcoming. it’s reactionary all the way down. like the fact that there are ppl who can say “detransitioners aren’t that, bad, i have some detrans friends,” and have this not seen as a red flag just because they’re, like, lesbians with gender issues, is absolutely bonkers

[sharkboywrites]

It would be great if we, collectively as a community, stopped throwing other lgbt people under the bus to talk about our own issues. It’s really not that necessary.

Like to would be great if we talked about transfem problems without randomly throwing in “yeah because transmascs have it so easy!”

It would be great if we could talk about the issues that come with being a certain sexuality without complaining about lesbians, or bisexuals, or gay men, or polyamorous people and how we think everything is about them (newsflash: its not and they have their own issues because being any type of queer is hard)

It would be great if we could let other lgbt people have representation and be happy for them, instead of turning it into complaining about how others don’t have as much representation. You know you can talk about wlw shows getting cancelled without making mlms feel bad for getting another season of heartstopper right? It’s not their fault and it’s good that they’re getting rep.

We can talk about our issues without making other queer people out to be our enemy, because they’re not

[alexandraisyes]

Seeing lot of aroace hate on my dash today, what’s up with that? Why are we targeting aroace creators for “not being aro enough” and “not being ace enough” in their writing of fictional characters?

I’m a sex-repulsed asexual. I’m offline enough to understand that just because someone makes a fictional character one sexuality doesn’t mean they don’t respect the canon sexuality of that character. And it definitely doesn’t mean they don’t respect real life people. Why the fuck are we more worried about fictional characters than real people?

A fictional character can be whatever you want it to be. They can be trans, they can be intersex, they can be gay or lesbian or bisexual or even fucking aroace and it would have no impact on the real world because they only exist on your google docs. If we can make straight characters gay, and male characters trans, and change everything about them then we shouldn’t throw a fit when creators project their specific aroace spiciness onto an aroace character.

Yes! There is a very small amount of sex-repulsed rep! There’s a very small amount of romance repulsed rep too! That is an issue! But fanfiction writers are not the owners of the original media, and them writing fanfiction with an aroace character and making them demisexual and aroflux instead of the “media friendly sex-and-romance-repulsed aroace” is not the end of the world.

Creators are not obligated to write what you want, and have you ever once thought of how hard it is to find rep of the other types of aroace? Because there’s more than just sex and romance repulsed. I’ve never read a published novel or seen a movie where a character is openly cupiosexual or demiromantic or aceflux. The entire spectrum is under represented, and so claiming it’s just romance and sex repulsed is really shitty when if the media is going to put in an aroace character they’re going to make them romance or sex repulsed. Name three canonically cupiosexual characters and I’ll retract this statement.

If you can’t find the stories you want to read, write them yourself. Attacking aroace creators for not being “aroace the right way” is aphobic as fuck.

Prioritize real people over fictional ones.

[thatfandomslut]

Not Into Guys

Regina George x Lesbian!Reader

Word Count: 1k

Trigger Warnings: Aaron Samuels (i'm joking, they're besties), underage drinking

Request:

Can I please request a fic where Regina is like “I know your secret you like Aaron” and super flirty reader is confused and like “Why would I like him when you’re here” and Regina is shocked and it’s super cute and they’re gay for each other!

Mean Girls requests are open.

This all started because of a rumor accidentally started by none other than Gretchen Wieners. "I heard her flirting with Aaron Samuels. She called him her boy toy." Gretchen informed Regina who crossed her arms, leaning back in her chair in thought. It wasn't hidden information that Regina George liked (Y/n). Regina thought they had a thing. Obviously, she was wrong if (Y/n) claimed Aaron to be her 'boy toy.' As she listened to Gretchen go on about everything she had heard, Regina's icy blue eyes landed on (Y/n) as she made her entrance into the classroom.

Typically, Regina had only kind things to say about (Y/n). Unfortunately, her entering with Aaron seemed to cause anything nice to leave her mind as she narrowed her eyes at them. She just couldn't understand why anyone in their right mind would choose Aaron over her. She was gorgeous, popular, and rich. However, Regina supposed that Aaron was kind and funny. People didn't usually associate Regina with those two attributes. Instead, they associated her with beautiful but mean. Which, was right, of course. Regina just hoped that wasn't something (Y/n) thought of her. She wanted (Y/n) to like her the way she did (Y/n).

"This class is kind of lame. I might leave before it starts," Regina interrupted Gretchen, hoping she would stop talking about (Y/n) and Aaron. If she had to hear any more information about them being together, she would either vomit or kill Gretchen. There was a possibility that both of those scenarios were likely, and she would commit both rather than either. Fortunately, the honey blonde beside her seemed to catch on, and she stopped talking about them. "It's not like I'm ever going to actually need geometry. I have people to do my math for me."

Karen nodded enthusiastically at the point that she made. Regina could easily ask Cady if she needed someone to look over floor plans. She was above math, she decided. Aaron had left once the bell rang, leaving (Y/n) by herself at her desk. A small, devilish smirk crossed Regina's lips as she stood up. "(Y/n), I was thinking about skipping class. Would you like to join us?" Regina questioned, and it didn't take a second thought for (Y/n) to accept the invite. Just like Regina, she didn't necessarily care for math. Instead, she would rather escape the confines of those four walls that held math puns and math memes due to the teacher trying to fit in. Karen and Gretchen were about to follow Regina out before she told them to stay. She had some things to talk to (Y/n) about. Specifically, things involving Aaron Samuels and why (Y/n) thought that Aaron was better than her.

Regina would never deny the fact that she was the jealous type. She had decided a long time ago that (Y/n) was going to be her girlfriend, Aaron wasn't going to ruin this plan with his boyish good looks or boy-next-door kindness. That was why Regina brought (Y/n) to the mall, to show off her money in an attempt to woo (Y/n). An attempt that failed as (Y/n) had to assure her over and over again that she didn't want anything Prada or Gucci. Regina was beginning to wonder how attached (Y/n) was to Aaron. If she couldn't convince her to date her over name-brand items, how was she going to convince her to date her at all?

"Okay, what's wrong, Regina?" (Y/n) questioned once they got to the food court. She was starting to grow concerned when Regina didn't comment on how badly styled the mannequins were like she usually did. She was starting to think that maybe it was something that she was doing wrong. If Regina would communicate with her, she would be able to accommodate and change whatever she was doing that was bothering Regina. "I feel like I've done something to upset you."

Regina realized she was beginning to let what Gretchen said about (Y/n) and Aaron get to her. However, instead of being able to keep it in, she was expressing it. A smile crossed her lips as she played it off. "Everything is fine, you did nothing wrong. Now that we're here, though, we can have girl talk." The two girls sat down, confusion bubbling (Y/n) at how quickly Regina changed her mood. "I know you're secret… You like Aaron Samuels." Regina stated confidently, looking down at (Y/n).

(Y/n), on the other hand, was only growing more confused. She wanted to laugh because of how confident Regina had said that. It was completely false. "Why would I have a crush on Aaron when you're here?" She questioned, crossing her arms as she looked up at Regina. It was unintentionally smooth. It caught Regina off guard as her cheeks began to heat up slightly at what she had said. "Aaron is my best friend, and I'm a lesbian." (Y/n) told Regina, wondering why she even thought she was remotely into him.

"Didn't you say he was your boy toy though? I've had great sources tell me this." Regina claimed. She sometimes needed to remind herself that Gretchen took information and ran with it. (Y/n) smiled a bit as shook her head. Leaning in, she kissed Regina, who reciprocated happily. She could hear her heart beating in her ear as she tried to keep herself from messing the kiss up by smiling at it. "Okay, okay, fine… You're not into Aaron."

(Y/n) laughed a bit at the comment before Regina pulled her back into a kiss. This time, she kissed deeper, not as nervous as the first time. Though, her heartbeat remained loud in her ears as they kissed. Regina couldn't care less if anyone was scowling, because all that mattered to her in that moment was how (Y/n)'s hands felt as they cupped her cheeks.

[visenyaism]

if you could write and direct eloise's season so she ends up with whoever you want her to be with, what would you do?

Eloise somehow convinces her mom and brother to let her see the world a bit before returning for one final season in society. she spends the summer studying abroad in Lesbos before the season begins and comes back and is like hey guys you’re never gonna believe what I found out about over there. everyone else is like girl if you ever read lady whistledown instead of just calling it lame you would literally already know about having a gay affair but whatever.

she is now locked in 100% for the lesbian spinster lifestyle, but being a spinster and living in her brothers house is kind of lame. her family annoys her a bit she needs to chart her own path and get her own house. What she needs is to bag a rich widow. if we’re keeping it close to the books it’s just gonna be marina crane, who instead of dying in childbirth is fine and her husband just slipped on a banana peel and died or something. or maybe cressida they’re fine. haven’t thought that far ahead. but you see the vision. spends the season milf hunting and like her brothers slowly realizing she has to actually like women and not just want to have sex with them in order to form a stable lifelong partnership. and also that she doesn’t hate the romantic shit like flowers and poetry when she is the one doing it for someone else.

the b plot is that benedict is involved in the plot of the movie challengers with another regency twink and an evil countess who makes them play badminton (typical bridgerton anachronism) and kiss a lot. this will not be coming up again,

[artinvain]

hey genuinely why does lesbianism have to include men now? like im not talking gender queer sometimes a boy lesbian, he/him lesbians because gender doesn’t lie in pronouns. Im not talking about trans men transitioning into different communities after being lesbians for most of their lives. I mean why are men/male aligned people claiming lesbianism, instead of just saying they love women? like I thought men were okay with being straight ? if they’re queer in other ways that’s ok. like I have never seen women or femme aligned people trying to claim being a gay man or entering gay spaces ??? for eg why “gaybian” why force gay and lesbian communities to open when the queer label is the all inclusive one you actually CAN claim????

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #29

MC: I love bears they’re so fucking big and dumb

Leviathan: I thought you were a lesbian?

MC: I am talking about the animal!!!!!!!!!!!!

Satan: This is kind of the opposite of straight people forgetting gays exist

•

Beelzebub: *me inhaling pure Neon into my body by sucking it out of an ‘open’ sign at a store: Hhhhhhhhh

Satan: Wtf

Beelzebub: I felt I was pretty clear

•

Mammon: Guy about to invent mayonnaise: damn I wish this sandwich tasted bad :/

Solomon: Op’s never had pizza with mayonnaise

Mammon: OP’s never throttled someone to death with their bare hands either but unlike what you said, that can change any second

•

Asmodeus: When in doubt slap His ass

Simeon: His is capitalized….are you talking about god’s ass?

Mammon: Are you in doubt? Just slap His ass

•

Mammon: Not to sound like a dr*gon but I do want your gold and I am going to lay on top of it in a pile inside a cave

Diavolo: Why did you censor dragon?

Mammon: Townsfolk may find it scary

•

MC: Killed a spider n now I feel bad :/

Mammon: Give birth to a spider to make up for it

Mammon: Why did I say that?

MC: Why did you say that

•

Luke: Hey everyone it’s 5:30 pm

Solomon: It’s 8:24 where I am

Luke: I decide the rules

Mammon: Rules are more like guidelines, fool

•

Asmodeus: How sharp is your knife (flirting)

Solomon: Come find out (flirting intensifies)

•

Diavolo: When people start having long random conversations on my posts, my initial thought is “I’m glad these two are having a nice talk” but then I investigate further and almost 100% of the time they’re both horny and role playing historical figures

Diavolo: You all wish I was joking

•

Solomon: 2025 bullies be like “give me your lunch coins or I’ll unsub from your dad’s onlyfans”

Leviathan: Posts that can cause physic damage

•

Satan: I am sending pain vibes your way. You will feel a lil discomfort on your leg

Mammon: Ouch

Satan: Yeah

•

Luke: What happens when you become tumblr famous?

Leviathan: So much happens

Simeon: Like what?

Solomon: So much??? God did you even read the post

Leviathan: Get his ass

•

Simeon: The best fruits are hardest to open

Beelzebub: This fucking bowling ball is gonna be delicious I know it

•

Solomon: YMCA but instead of young man they say comrade and YMCA is USSR

MC: Comrade, steel production is down

Solomon: I said comrade, you must sleep on the ground

•

Diavolo: You think I have a choice? I have to be real

Mammon: This isolated message makes me feel like I’m about to be shot and killed

MC: This reminds me of grandma

Mammon: Hi! What does this mean?

•

Thirteen: God I wish there was a wasteland I could banish people to

Mammon: It’s the afterlife, sis

Thirteen: You’re right! I could simply murder and kill the people I don’t like! Why didn’t I think of this?

•

Mammon: Want a gf but I ain’t prepared… I’ve not land to give, no cattle…

Last • Next

[sgt-tombstone]

y’all don’t mind if I ramble about a fic idea that’s been knocking around in my head for a while but will never get written, do you?

cool

it’s a grumpy-and-sunshine-professor AU where Simon is a history professor studying the history of death and Johnny is a professor of chemistry studying pyrotechnics. They both have fierce reputations within their departments; Johnny for being a lenient grader and an excellent teacher, and Simon for being a complete hardass

They’re secretly married to each other, but no one ever takes classes with both of them, so there hasn’t ever been a student that has found out. Johnny talks about his husband constantly, never by name, but his computer background is a picture of two unmistakably masculine hands with matching rings, obviously a wedding photo, and he usually starts class with a little story about something funny that his husband did the day/night before. It’s well-known that his husband is blond, massive, and an utter sweetheart. They obviously adore each other, if the weekend date stories that he tells are any indication (always innocent, of course)

Simon, on the other hand, never talks about his personal life at all. He starts class on the dot, getting straight to the point without any fanfare or chitchat. He’s a man of few words, and he uses them well and efficiently. He wears a ring on a necklace, and it sometimes slips out of his shirt during lecture, but no one dares ask (stories are told of the one student who did, and got a glare so acidic that he had dropped the class on the spot)

Then along comes (insert OC’s name here), who is a biology student focusing on infectious diseases. Johnny is her advisor and she adores him (not in that way, she’s a lesbian and he’s obviously besotted with his husband). She had him for her introductory chemistry classes and he was the only reason she passed; she’s trusted his judgment and advice implicitly ever since. So when she asks what class she should take for her required history elective, he recommends a class called The History and Impacts of the Black Death, and it sounds right up her alley but the professor listed gives her pause. She’s heard of Dr. Riley, of course; nearly everyone on campus has heard the stories of traumatized history majors avoiding Dr. Riley’s classes (ironically) like the plague. But she trusts Dr. MacTavish, so she registers anyway.

The class is tough. In her opinion, it’s way too difficult for an elective class, especially on top of her other upper level science classes, but she hasn’t gotten this far without knowing how to step up to a challenge, and Dr. Riley’s scathing feedback on her first assignment has her digging her heels in instead of throwing in the towel. The topic is interesting; she’d never really looked into the history of infectious diseases, and the Black Death is morbidly fascinating. She struggles a bit with the historical aspects of the class at first, especially when Dr. Riley expects his students to already have a firm grasp on Medieval history and she very much does not, but she’ll never pass up an opportunity to do some external research to catch up to where the rest of the class—populated mostly by history majors—is in their studies.

Towards the end of the semester, close to the end of November, the student’s mother finds out about her girlfriend and kicks her out late at night. With nowhere else to go, she remembers that Dr. MacTavish is both openly gay and has invited groups of students to his house for club meetings and field trips. It’s a little awkward, but she doesn’t have anywhere else to go, so she walks to his house in the rain. When she knocks on the door, Dr. MacTavish answers with clear concern, and he waves her inside quickly. She explains her situation, panicking about the entire thing because she’s standing in her advisor’s house at 10pm, her parents have just cut her off, and she’s scared and wet. Dr. MacTavish calls into the other room, presumably to his husband, asking for a towel.

The last person she expects to round the corner is Dr. Riley, holding a fluffy towel and an expression equally as concerned as Dr. MacTavish’s. His husband.

She has to sit down.

They sit and talk as she dries off and warms up. Johnny makes her a cup of hot chocolate while Dr. Riley—Simon—builds a fire in the fireplace. She huddles close to it as they talk, and she eventually ekes the story out of them; how they met, how they hated each other at first, how they fell in love. Simon is talkative and animated, drawing energy from the man sitting beside him, and the student finds herself enchanted by the two of them, the side of her professors that she never gets to see. It should feel like a breach of privacy, a line crossed, but it feels like staying up late with her uncles. They make up the guest bedroom for her and all go to bed, reminded that they all have class tomorrow.

The student ends up staying with some friends, couch-surfing in their apartment until she can get her feet back under her, but she spends several nights a week at the Riley-MacTavish household, delving into the intricacies of infectious diseases and their connection to society with Simon. She enjoys the friendly arguments the two professors get into and often chooses sides arbitrarily to keep them on their toes. She switches her advisor from Johnny to Simon (Johnny pretends to be upset, but he’s secretly overjoyed that Simon is connecting so well with a student), and ends up writing a thesis paper under his tutelage.

Idk how it’s gonna end yet, maybe with a far future scene where she sees the two of them at a conference and throws herself at them, wrapping them both in massive hugs. It earns her several very odd stares, especially from those who know Dr. Riley’s reputation, but she doesn’t care. They were there for her in the darkest night of her life, and she’ll always have a soft spot for both of them

[sapphiresaphics]

I remember when The Owl House came out and there was INTENSE shipping of Amity and Luz. There were no other male characters Luz’s age, so the queer ship set sail. Then it was revealed Amity does in fact like Luz and the shipping exploded! By the end of season 1, Lumity was the most popular ship by far in the Owl House fandom.

But then Hunter was introduced in season 2. And the SECOND Luz and Hunter shared screen time together, suddenly there was intense hate and backlash to Amity even existing. Even when Amity kissed Luz and basically solidified them as the endgame couple of the show, there was INTENSE Lunter fanart and posting.

People’s reasoning was that Luz is bi and therefore she can like Hunter just as much as Amity. But it sure as heck didn’t feel like that at the time. As a lesbian in the fandom it felt more like people were trying to use Luz’s bi sexuality to straight wash the ships. And it felt very insidious since this was the first openly queer relationship Disney was allowing on the air. We finally got a queer wlw ship and people were trying to downplay it and take it over, using Luz’s sexuality as an excuse.

It felt targeted.

And it got BAD.

Every time Amity and Luz shared a cute moment together, someone would do re-draws of the scenes but swap out Amity for Hunter. And they’d deliberately tag the Lumity hashtag to force their ship into places it didn’t belong. For the longest time the Lunter hashtag was incredibly toxic and hateful towards anyone who called them out for this wlw erasure.

As the show progressed it became clear Hunter had a crush on Willow. And overnight the Lunter hashtag swapped to being Wintlow instead. They continued to do the same tactics as before, such as redrawing scenes of Lumity as Wintlow instead, but it thankfully stopped encroaching on the Lumity fanbase.

Still, to this day, if you search the Owl House hashtag you will find a disproportionate amount of Hunter X Willow artwork and fanfics.

I think of this whenever I see Jayvik fanart in the Arcane hashtag.

The number of people who are openly dismissive of Caitlyn and Vi and Mel being in relationships is staggering. Saying “whatever Jayce and Viktor had going on is gayer than Caitlyn and Vi!” is just as insidious as what the Lunter fandom was doing to Lumity.

We FINALLY got canon lesbian couples (not even bi, but full blown openly lesbian couples) in Arcane and all the fandom can talk about is Jayce and Viktor. A non-canon gay ship that dismisses Mel entirely and pretends like she never existed while denigrating Violyn because “Caitlyn is a cop and ACAB!”

I’m just so tired of this all. This dismissal of my sexuality and representation by the fandom hurts so much. And it seems to keep happening in every fandom that has a wlw ship.

I’m sure a lot of people aren’t even really aware they’re doing it either. Or they don’t feel like it’s a big deal. But after spending so much of my life YEARNING for canon wlw couples in animated shows, it’s disheartening to say the least how underrepresented we are.

[mxlti-fand0m-imaginess]

Unrequited // Hazel Callahan

request: Could you write a college Hazel x femme reader where they're roommates and Hazel is in their shared room upset, crying cause they have a really horrible friend who convinced Hazel that reader doesn't like her back and got all in her head about it.

prompts: none!

summary: when pj convinces hazel that there’s no way you could return her feelings, hazel starts to push you away, hurting you in the process.

warnings: none!

word count: 1.5k

a/n: gn!reader, reader is implied to be a lesbian

join my taglist!

“Look, you need to get over yourself. It’s never going to happen. Ever,” PJ said as she sat down next to Hazel.

Before PJ had so rudely interrupted, Hazel was gazing at you from across the quad, blissfully lost in her thoughts about you. Since the beginning of the school year, all Hazel could think about was you. You had been assigned as roommates, and ever since Hazel first saw you she was utterly, completely, and hopelessly in love with you. And sometimes she couldn’t help but wonder if you could ever feel the same. But unfortunately, PJ wasn’t having it.

“What?” Hazel asked as she looked over to PJ, a bit startled by her sudden appearance and slightly aggressive tone.

“There is no way they like you back. None. Zero. So get over it.”

Hazel frowned at her best friend’s words. “You really think so?”

PJ groaned in exasperation. “Uh, yeah. I mean just look at them. They’re like the straightest person ever. And even if by some miracle they were gay, there’s no way in hell you could pull them.”

Hazel tried not to let it show how much PJ’s words had affected her, but they had cut deep. Her eyes watered slightly and she quickly blinked to fight back the tears. Of course you would never like her. You’re… amazing. And she’s just… Hazel.

“Yeah… maybe you’re right,” Hazel sniffled, ultimately failing to hold back her tears. “Uhm, I- I’m gonna go. See you later.”

Hazel gathered her things and headed towards her dorm room, hurriedly wiping away her tears. At that moment, you looked up and saw her storming away, looking utterly miserable, and you felt your heart ache. You hated it when Hazel was sad, of course, you hated when anyone was sad, but with Hazel it was different. All you wanted was for her to be happy, and it killed you when she wasn’t. Hurriedly grabbing your bag, you rushed after her, hoping you could help make her smile again.

~

You were about to open the door to your dorm when you heard a soft sniffling from the other side. You frowned, Hazel was crying. So instead, you lightly knocked on the door, not wanting to intrude if she wanted to be alone.

“Hazel? Can I come in?” you asked, pressing your ear against the door and straining to hear her answer.

When she didn’t answer, you raised your hand to knock again, but Hazel pulled the door open just before you could. You felt your heart sink at the look of utter devastation on her face, and you wished you could just take all her pain away.

You stepped forward to hug her, but Hazel stepped back, walking over to her bed and sitting back down, pulling her knees to her chest.

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. Hazel always let you hug her. Something must’ve really been wrong.

You stepped inside and shut the door behind you before you walked over to your bed and sat down, facing her. You slipped your bag off your shoulder and pulled off your jacket, waiting to see if Hazel wanted to talk about it. When it became clear that she didn’t want to say anything, you took it upon yourself to break the silence.

“Hazel, what’s wrong? I’ve never seen you like this before.”

Hazel didn’t reply, staring blankly into space. Now you were really worried. She was almost never sad, and even when she was it wasn’t this bad. You stood up and walked over to her, sitting down beside her.

“Talk to me. Please. I wanna help,” you whispered, looking at her intently.

Hazel shook her head and hugged her legs tighter. “You can’t help me. You’re just making this worse.”

Your heart shattered at her words. The last thing you would ever want to do was hurt you. You loved her. And seeing her so miserable just broke your heart.

“Are you upset with me? Did I do something?”

Hazel sighed, her sobs quieting down slightly. “Just go away. Leave me alone.”

Your felt your eyes begin to water as her words struck you. She had to have been upset with you, but you had no idea what you’d done. She was so upset she didn’t even want you around her. All you wanted to do was make it better, to make her smile again. But it was starting to seem like it wouldn’t be such an easy fix this time.

“Alright then. If that’s what you want, I’ll leave you alone,” you said, getting up and grabbing your jacket, heading out of the room to give Hazel the space she asked for.

Once you were gone, Hazel only started to cry harder. She could tell her words had hurt you, and that just made her feel worse. She didn’t want you to leave, not really. It’s just that being around you only reminded her of what she couldn’t have. And that only made everything she was feeling even worse.

~

It had been a few days since you had found Hazel crying in your shared dorm room, and ever since she had pretty much been avoiding you. You missed her so much, you were so used to spending almost every day with her, and now that she was avoiding you, all you could feel was the pain of her missing presence.

You just wanted her back. You wanted to know what you did to hurt her so badly. You wanted to fix it, to make things right again so you could finally have the best thing that had ever happened to you back in your life again. But as the days passed, you knew the likelihood of that was dwindling.

You were sitting on your bed attempting to do homework, not making any progress because all you could think about was Hazel, when the door opened and Hazel stepped in. Her eyes widened when she saw you, a grimace appearing on her face.

“Oh, I didn’t think you’d be here. I think I’m just gonna go…” she said awkwardly, turning to walk back out the door.

“Don’t go! Please…” the utter desperation in your voice made Hazel stop in her tracks.

You sniffled, all of your pent up emotions finally spilling out. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? Whatever I did to make you hate me so much, I’m sorry. I miss you. I miss you so much it hurts. Just please… tell me how I can fix this,” you pleaded, your voice breaking as you began to cry.

Hazel felt horrible. She had only been ignoring you to protect her own feelings, and she didn’t even stop to consider yours. Hazel closed the door behind her and walked over to your bed, sitting down beside you.

“You- you didn’t do anything,” Hazel admitted guiltily.

“Then why are you avoiding me? Why do you hate me so much? Did you just get tired of me?” you began to cry harder, too overwhelmed by your feelings.

“I- I can’t say…” Hazel mumbled, torn between wanting to comfort you and keeping her feelings hidden out of fear of pushing you away ever more than she already had.

You turned to look at her, your eyes red and puffy and your cheeks wet with tears. Hazel frowned, and against her better judgment, she pulled you into a hug. You felt yourself relax into her embrace, hugging her back tightly, not ever wanting to let go.

“Hazel, please. Just tell me what’s wrong. I love you. I don’t want things to just end like this.”

Hazel froze. Surely she must’ve heard you wrong. There’s no way you could’ve just said that you loved her. It just wasn’t possible.

“What did you just say?” Hazel asked, slightly in shock from what she thought she heard.

You sighed and pulled away from her embrace, wiping your tears away with the back of your hands. “I- I said I love you. I know this is an absolutely horrible time to say something like this, especially because you seem to hate being around me all of a sudden, but I love you. I’ve loved you practically since we first met. And I know that-”

Hazel cut you off, connecting her lips to yours. You squeaked in shock from the unexpected action before completely melting into her touch. You kissed back eagerly, not ever wanting the moment to end.

Hazel pulled away first, resting her forehead against yours as she panted for breath. Coming down from the high of finally getting to kiss the girl you’ve been in love with for months, you only felt more confused.

“I’m sorry,” Hazel said, taking your hands in hers. “I- I never meant to hurt you like this. I- I love you too. And I was only avoiding you like this because PJ had me convinced that you could never like me back and I just couldn’t stand to be around you because of how much it hurt. But I never realized that I would be hurting you too. I am so so sorry. Is there any way you could forgive me?”

You smiled softly, sniffling again as you wiped away your tears. “I’ll forgive you. On one condition.”

Hazel nodded eagerly. “Yeah, anything.”

You smiled as you leaned in. “Kiss me again.”

tags: @hazelvrr

[unfinishedslurs]

RIP Mike Wheeler’s heterosexuality

“Is being gay contagious?”

Steve stares at his phone groggily before putting it back against his ear. “…Mike?”

“Is it?”

“It’s three in the fuckin’ morning is what it is.” He rubs his nose, Mike’s words finally catching up to his brain. “Seriously, Mike? No it’s not fucking contagious, you’re not gonna get the gay disease or whatever from me. I promise you’ll keep liking girls.”

He’s a little hurt, even though he knows the question is innocent. They’ve been asking a lot of questions, like the inquisitive little assholes they are, but none of them had seemed like they weren’t okay with it. Until now.

“…that’s not what I meant,” Mike says. Steve realizes that his voice sounds shaky, even over the phone.

“Then what—“ he cuts himself off, realizing halfway through his bitching that there was only one reason Mike would call about this. “Oh.”

“Can you pick me up?”

“It’s three in the morning,” he repeats, even as he starts wondering where he left his keys. “Your mom…”

“Steve,” Mike pleads. “Please?”

He sighs. “I’m on my way.”

Mike is sitting on his doorstep when he pulls up, head in his hands. Steve doesn’t have to get out of the car, he stalks to the passenger door with all the vitriol of a boy with too many emotions to hold in, and wrenches the door open hard enough that Steve worries he’s going to break it.

“Watch it, noodle arms,” he says, trying to pretend this is normal. Maybe if he acts like it’s not well past midnight, Mike will relax.

It doesn’t work. Mike slumps in his seat, not bothering with the seatbelt. “Can you just drive?”

Steve drives. Doesn’t really know where they’re going, but it doesn’t matter. Just away seems to suffice.

He eventually pulls into a side road

“I’m scared to even touch another guy now! Because apparently hugging is gay when you’re older, and so is sleeping in the same bed, and telling your friends you love them, and…and I’m fucking scared all the time, ‘cause what if they’re right? How do they know? How can they tell by just fucking looking at me? It’s bullshit!”

“Shit, kid,” Steve says, heartbroken. “Shit. C’mere.”

He pulls him close, and Mike turns his face into the crook of his neck, shaking. His shirt collar starts to get damp.

“I don’t know what to do,” he cries. “I thought it was normal, I thought everyone was just…so scared all the time, and we just didn’t talk about it. But then you said that thing about being afraid and pushing it down, and I didn’t— I tried to ignore it. I tried so hard not to think about it, Steve, I swear I tried.”

“I know you did,” he says quietly. It hits him that he might be the only one who really gets it. Eddie gave up denying it long ago, deciding to evolve into something else for them to focus on. Robin’s a girl. Which doesn’t mean jack shit in most cases, because being a lesbian fucking sucks in a town like Hawkins, but girls aren’t as obsessive about it. Sometimes when they compare notes, Robin will just stare at him.

Mike shakes his head. “I don’t know what I did wrong,” he mumbles tearfully into his shoulder.

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Steve says with a surprising amount of vehemence. He grabs Mike by his scrawny little shoulders, pulls him away so he can look directly into his bloodshot eyes. “Not a damn thing, do you hear me? There is nothing wrong with you, and anyone who tells you otherwise deserves a swift kick in the balls. Got it?”

Mike responds by bursting into loud, messy sobs.

Steve just keeps holding him, running a hand through his hair and soothing him gently, like he wishes someone had done for him or Robin or Eddie when they were young. Finally Mike pulls away, embarrassment starting to set in.

“Sorry,” he mutters.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Steve asks instead of a meaningless platitude he knows Mike wouldn’t accept.

Mike gives him a suspicious look. “I guess.”

“I’m scared too. All the time.”

“No you’re not,” Mike snorts. “You don’t need to make me feel better just because I’m a pussy.”

“I’m not joking,” he says. “Why do you think I dated girls? Why do you think I went through so many lengths to hide it? It’s fucking terrifying, man. But you know what makes it less scary?”

“Dating girls? Marrying a woman?”

“No.” He pokes Mike’s chest, right over his heart. “People. Friends who love and accept you. Friends who know what you’re going through, even.”

“Do you…” Mike chews his lip. “Do you think Nancy would be okay with it? With me?”

“Absolutely I do. She was okay with me, wasn’t she? And I was her boyfriend.”

“Yeah, but it’s different when it’s your family, right? Sometimes people don’t care if someone is… people don’t care until it affects them. Do you think Nancy is like that?”

He knows Nancy isn’t like that, but that's a talk they’re going to have to have themselves. “I really don’t,” he encourages. “I think she’d be really glad to know this part of you, actually. She loves you.”

“…I know,” he says, shifting uncomfortably. “I don’t… we made this dumb no secrets pact the first time the Upside-Down happened, I don’t know why. It’s stupid. But…I don’t want to keep secrets from her anymore.”

[butchpeace]

Hey, I am a new follower here and uhhh.. I just want to ask you how did you manage to get rid of your gender dysphoria?

I never did transition and probably never will be able to because it is illegal in the country I currently live in. But the gender dysphoria remained there for years (8) even if I accept the fact that I will never be able to change my sex, along with my homosexuality.

So maybe it is a difference in experience, with me not being able to experience the harmful placebo of the "right body", but seeing other people expressing how they got themselves cured of severe mental distress makes me wish I knew how to do that.

So, thats why I want to ask, what lead to the cure of gender dysphoria? If it is a correct way to put it.

I don’t know if you’re male or female, but I assume female?

It’s less about “getting rid” of dysphoria and more about understanding what “gender dysphoria” actually is. That differs from person to person, but for most people it’s a combination of things.

For me it was:

1) The pain of growing up female in a world that either treated me as inferior or objectified me. Plain old misogyny.

2) The pain of growing up gay in a homophobic religion and society. Being basically taught during childhood that I was fundamentally different and wrong did a number on my ability to love myself. I’m 33 and it wasn’t until recently that I had any kind of self love.

3) The confusion of growing up gender non-conforming. Not feeling like I could relate to my female peers, feeling like an outsider, never meeting people like me or having any role models who I could see myself in. I didn’t have any kind of blueprint for what my life could be like as an adult - my only reference points for what life as a masculine lesbian would be were negative.

4) The constant anxiety of walking through the world as a gender non-conforming girl, and the way people treated me and acted around me. People don’t treat you well when you’re androgynous or clearly gay, and that led to anxiety and disliking being around people.

5) Feeling like I would be more lovable as a man, as it relates to relationship dynamics and gender roles. I had a feeling that I “made more sense” as a man.

Once I separated the feelings I was having from the idea of “gender dysphoria” as a stand-alone condition, I was able to see them individually for what they really are.

Those feelings were a normal response to being who I was in the world that I lived in.

Is my “gender dysphoria” cured? Depends how you look at it. Being female is still hard. Being a masculine lesbian is still hard. The way people look at me and treat me is still anxiety inducing. But none of that means I’m “supposed” to be a man, for some mystical reason that no one can scientifically explain. And I can work on improving things like my anxiety and self esteem individually.

To put it simply, being “trans” is the same thing as being butch. It’s all the same feelings women have always had, they’re just medicalizing it now instead of helping us learn to love ourselves. The only way to fix it is to build community, especially intergenerational community, and be with each other and be role models for each other.

Hope that helps! 🌈