#and in the bg we have a lot more people! Try to spot them!

[granlance]

It's New Years Eve!

Whether you are like this grumpy ninja with a heart of gold and prefer to eat in peace or like his crazy family in the background partying loudly, I hope you have a great end of 2022

He'll join the festivity's with them soon enough 🌘

Happy Birthday to Kurogane! 🎇

[millipede-menace]

The bands back together! And they’re old lol

Art Notes/Rants below ⬇️

⚠️Warning⚠️

it is very long, I got a lot to say apparently lol

❗️They’re all aged up btw! In case you’re all wondering why i���m even redesigning them lol

🐱Chizu Mini Rant: I hate Chizu’s design in the show. Not the clothing more so the body model. I hate that they made her the stereotypical curvy cat girl with a tiny hourglass waist and tiny hands and feet. Really weird proportions, Like we’re going back to the betty boop era but no one else in the show looks like this? (Also, No hate to people who are curvy btw love you) It just doesn’t feel like it belongs in the show. Maybe if she were shorter, it would work better? Idk Also she’s like the only one in a full skin tight suit (like I get animation, but they didn’t even bother giving her implied loose clothes or armor like the other ninjas? Maybe bc she was undercover? but then she should’ve been wearing something closer to the bg character models) It’s like they’re trying to make her sexy but like why?????? for why????

I really liked the concept art of Chizu. She’s got a more sharp/rigid and square silhouette but still some curves (w/o it being weird). She still has tiny hands but her head isn’t the size of a watermelon and her face isn’t super tiny, the proportions are good. She’s all power stanced up lol She looks mean and menacing, someone not to trust or mess with. It’s literally spot on. ✨chef kiss ✨ It’s also probably why they didn’t really go with it, they probably rounded her out to be more appealing for the reveal? or she was hard to animate cause she did have baggier pants idk. Who am I, but a rando with a hard boiled egg for brains.

Art Notes: I took a lot of inspiration from the comics and I did want to keep her iconic red so she was still recognizable & stand out from the neko ninja. I made her a regular black cat! (with the idea of black cats being less likely to be adopted & be strays) (;-;) (I know she was kidnapped but still!! The stray cat vibes!!!) I gave her a more lean and tall figure, kinda like the comics but also to play off of Kistune’s height and it give scrawny stray cat vibes . . . again lol. It’s also a body shape I don’t see a lot in physically strong female characters (or maybe I do and just don’t remember? Idk but she can definitely kick your ass & she’s not here for anybody’s bullshit lol) I gave her the iconic ponytail from the comics along with the comb Kitsune usually wears. I wanted to give her green eyes (bc black cat & red and green) but i just kept them yellow. Maybe i’ll go back and change them. Her outfit is mostly inspired from Karai (bc she’s a ninja from eons ago & the gang is a little more traditional) just (pretend cuz i’m lazy) with traditional Japanese patterns. Chizu definitely got kunais and stars up her sleeves, but bc she doesn’t have to be a ninja anymore, I imagine her more into wearing pretty dresses with patterns and cute things. Stuff she never got to wear/ enjoy as a kid, you know. The show really wants to push her to be a bad ass girl boss who hates everyone and everything and is too cool and edgy for games but idk. I like to think she left the ninja stuff behind her and started living her own life based on exploring things rather than just being the cool ninja with an edgy backstory. I think she uses ninjitsu as a means of self defense but doesn’t like being connected to it b/c of the kidnapping and stuff. (We also see how she doesn’t really care about the tradition of ninjitsu cause during the show, she has no fucking clue what to do with the neko ninja, she just wanted them to stop hurting people and wanted to free the babies lol) Usagi and Kitsune are the ones who indulge her childish side. She wears a lot of red but her favorite color is pink. Kitsune def hypes her up and goes feral when she wears pink.

🦊 Kitsune Mini Rant: I hate Kitsune’s clothes in the show. Idk it just doesn’t look right on her. It’s got no shape it’s got no hiding spots for stolen goods. It’s not Kitsune. I like the concept art fit, it’s really cute. (She looks like a mini tank who will fuck you up in a cute way) but still #1 thing missing. Hiding spots for stolen goods!!! She needs some loose sleeves or flowy clothing like in the comics. (btw: I know it would be harder to animate in the show therefore I accept what they gave her but still!!!)

Art Notes: I’m not too sure about Kitsune’s fit tbh. I’m still workshopping it. She just needs something with loose sleeves! (Like she for sure is stealing shit and putting it up her sleeves, you can’t tell me i’m wrong/ it’s also where she could keep her fans!) I think i’m obsessed with her sleeves cause I imagine her gambling or playing a game of cards with a bunch of dangerous criminals and someone accuses her of cheating and she goes “What?! Me?! No, no. I’m just that good or maybe . . . you’re just that bad-” Then all the stolen cards fall out her sleeves and she just goes -fuck. and it turns into this picture vvv

ANYWAYS!!!! I gave her short hair bc idk, a girls gotta change it up sometime 💅 I actually liked her hair mimicking a fox tail but I feel like she would get bored of it and chop it all off one day. She's definitely the one who cuts and dye’s her hair at 1am then cries about it the next day. She’s got visibly longer ears and sharper face. Kitsune and Usagi wanted to get piercings together cause they’re besties and want to be edgy (she lowkey got it on her left ear to match Chizu) and so they did and Usagi’s Auntie was so PISSED lol. They got chewed out. Her hands and feet should be a little darker but i forgor. Also she’s got dark teal wrappings so it would be hard to tell anyways. I gave her the crop top with buttons from the concept art and the sleeves from the comic. They have the same maple leaf print from her comic too (i’m just lazy) and the cuffs are just lined to mimic the layers she had. She’s got her little pack, she’s also got some more smaller ones on the back (kinda like Leo). She also made a comment about not having money to buy herself shoes so . . . she’s got no shoes lol. It just wrappings under her shin guards. (no shoes just like Leo smh) It helps her be more sneaky tho >:)

Oh and they’re dating but i feel like that’s a given lol. I saw people shipping them at first and it literally went -> *sees ship* Oh they’re shipping the only two main female characters together again- yeah that’s greeeat- *Watches the show* oh. nvm I retract my sarcasm, they’re def gay for each other, thats nice. This is nice -w-

which is pretty funny, cause I think they don't like each other in the comics? (from what I saw in the singles panels I used as a reference at least) Chizu’s legit ready to kill Kitsune lol

Post Note: I totally forgot Chizu chose a bow and arrow as a weapon so now she’s just the stereotypical tall archer . . . i’m gonna go now ;-;

Gen Mini Rant: Holy Moly dudes, he was sooooo hard to draw ;-; I don't hate his design at all, actually it's one I like the most. I just don't like that there's not a lot of contrast on the 3D model and he kind just blends into a purple blob. (for me at least) I defiantly didn't do him justice but that's the best it's gonna get (from me that is.)

Art Notes: Don't look the feet . . . for any of them but mostly Gen lol. I don't really like the purple I chose but every color combo I did just looked bad idk. I can't do color, don't look at me man. Me and purple do not mix. He's still a bounty hunter so I wanted to keep his armor but I wanted him to have a long tail-coat/cape-ish jacket cause he would look cool as hell with one of those >:) (prob not practical but still) I wanted to add elbow and knee pads, but he's a rhino, he can take it. Also how can bad guys hurt him if he's too busy beating them up with his brass knuckles? He's still got his clubs but he likes clanging his fists together. lol His horn grew back! He's also got a goatee and everyone makes fun of him. The gang always threatens to shave it off in his sleep. I took more inspo from the show than the comic cause I don't really know Gen in the comics and what I did find was just miyamoto usagi but purple ;-; (clothes wise)

I wasn’t kidding, I had a lot to say, any survivors?

Feel free to suggest or critic my designs!! :0 Im not a design person and its mostly just for fun, but i looooove hearing people’s takes, especially hot takes >:) i like poking brains, its fun ^^

[soulsxng]

∞ Iomhar for Ranadi

@arcxnumvitae | ∞ meme | No longer accepting!

If I Think They Are: Ugly || Plain || Alright || Cute || Freaking Adorable || Pretty || Beautiful || Hot || Stunning 

"I just thought about this, but he and Sivel kind of give off that sort of 'unapproachably attractive' vibe that some couples get. You know what I mean? And then one of them opens their mouth and says something that really makes you want to groan. And not always in a good way! Probably not even usually in a good way. It's hilarious."

If I Would Go On A Date With Them: Not even if we were the last two one earth || No || Maybe || Eh….Sure || Yes || WILL YOU MARRY ME

"Alsi and me are probably going to have to hold his hands or something to keep him from wandering off or anything though. I don't know why I get that feeling, I just do. Like he's going to see something interesting, or spot an attractive person, and he'll be gone." (Alsina in the bg saying that Ranadi is the same way, and that it's her that's going to have to be holding their hands the whole time)

If I Trust Them: Not At All || Not Really || Kind of || Yes || With My Life

"Why wouldn't I? Iomhar is that really earnest type of person that, if you ask him to do, or not do something, he's going to try his best to make sure he's doing what you asked. Even if he struggles with it. Even if he makes a misstep, he'll tell you about it and then try to do better. It's impossible not to trust someone like that!"

If I Care About Them: Not At All || Not Really || Kind of || Yes || Deeply

"Yeah! I'm lucky to have him around-- we all are. He needs a good kick in the butt from time to time, when he's thinking about doing something stupid, but that's pretty much it. I do kind of worry about what might happen if one of our enemies sets their sights on him, though. He...is a little easy to take advantage of, I think. So we'll all need to keep an eye on him to make sure he's safe."

If I Would Sleep With Them: Not Enough Alcohol in the World || No || Maybe if I were wasted || Maybe || Eh…Sure || Yes || TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF NOW! 

"Though it's more likely to be a one off thing. I have a lot of stamina sure, but I definitely don't have the drive that he has. I'm pretty sure I would die!"

My Comfort Level With Your Muse: Keep a Distance || Okay You Can Stand There, But Don’t Touch Me || Let’s Get Coffee and Talk || Let’s Cuddle || I Can Change In Front of You || Let’s Take a Bath Together

"I'm told a lot that I don't really have many boundaries with people that are actually able to, you know, see me and all that. Physical contact and whatever is a little weird, but not in a bad way-- it's just because I'm not used to it. I don't really care about seeing anyone naked or anything like that. Iomhar is an easy person to talk to, and he doesn't strike me as the type to go spreading things around if you ask him to keep something to himself...so really, whatever is fine?"

If I See You As: A Stranger || An Acquaintance || A Friend || A Close Friend || My Best Friend || A Crush || The Love of My Life

"He's part of the claim now, whether he likes it or not! I hope he does though, because he's stuck with us at this point. Maybe we'll just kidnap him from Seelie, or something! That totally wouldn't start an interrealm incident, right? Right!"

[the-firebird69]

You people say you're in charge no matter how small you are what kind of stupid particular you're in or even the powerless and Stan wisinski doesn't he doesn't have hardly any power there's people are teeny and these demons are small too you don't you simply do not have the power to get me the money or stuff and you're holding on by one finger and you say it all the time and you're trying to threaten me with your damn finger when another group will come in. I don't know what to tell you you're splitting yourselves up and you're already weaker than a little kid little babies this formula is not hard to figure out and BG said it his people were getting him stuff his whole life they're small beat up going down now they're running Saturn and you can't figure it out and he is damned angry and I am too I don't have a problem with another party opposing the empire but Trump has spent and he just wants to go backwards and f*** himself because it's AI boy I'm sick and tired of this dumb piece of s*** I'm telling my people remove him on those grounds and you have to you have to be trying it's it's not for our plan and it's starting to realize it and jeez this is terrible BG says it is terrible it's really really simple the empire is going to pay me later probably too late and plans to keep going all of you so what does that tell you

Zues Hera

He's trying to say it in English doesn't want to turn into Trump just a mean Trump who says you should get it and isn't I get this stuff we're sitting here watching them deteriorate not doing anything and he's stuck there and it's not good for us the empire is doing it on purpose using the threat that we're posing and they intend on getting them stuff later and escaped like us for all the ills of Earth and more. Now this is simple stuff that we thought you guys got into Christ it doesn't sound like you have any of it and it's bad. I don't know how to explain it no I do. If you keep on doing this to him you're taking the brunt of what a overt lame cheesy threat does but you do it all day long to each other everywhere and I saw his point so now you're separated out because no one can stand you and we're screwed he says it too I don't know what else to do

Camilla

and it's probably the Mac plan anyways but who cares I'm going to get attacked finally when they were just going to get dicked around with and have their fat asses on them and that's changed because the empire is not helping him either it's kind of a blessing in disguise but really guys you can't overcome any of what the empire wants and he says it he says what if you got me $100 more than what they wanted would you lose your spot in social security because you gave me the $30 whatever it was garth and I made rooting his uncle's house was this idiot Trump. In other words the other ones getting the money to me and that's money that is probably outside of their reenactment and you don't do anything like that Trump so you don't know what it's like I don't know

Zues

Is that where extorting that's another thing and I don't really know what it is he says probably but I think I do we're going around doing things and the empire is having us do stuff it's not helping us and we're calling an extortion I'm not really getting anything

Trump

They put it in the hospital for a few reasons she's Mac proper back then they're taking stuff and they put them in there to make sure that nothing happened and they're also filling them up with this medicine she's fussed or radiate himself is forced to he drags us around and we get killed and they're removing leadership and you think it's good cuz you're stupid and they did that to you so I got my work cut out for us having to do some crazy s*** and force you to evacuate and it'll kick us out then they're going to go after the ships but he says is he thinks there's so many of these more luck that they're going to grab a lot of the ships and at the empire is not going to get as many as you think that's probably true and then there's Tommy f but we think we're going to push him out and the warlock will probably grab those and the Trump stores will be out that's pretty much what I see and he's seeing it too but you guys are cheap and you're not overcoming anything we know what the back pain is kind of and he's right and they're going to pay him later and you can hear it and he keeps making it richer and richer and he can't help it he's saying I don't have money for a long range battery and you want me to shut my mouth Dave AKA Dan you're a nutcase you should go hang yourself somewhere see your father can find you and he can hang himself you're useless monster God honest to God you can't you could not give me a hundred bucks out of line of that Mac progress stuff he thinks his mom did with a thousand bucks and she did at Wells Fargo on purpose and it is a code and she said we used to do it a little and we know what it does they run around telling you what their plan was and then you're screwing it up and none of you can do it she had records on JC and Mary and a lot of clan did and they knew about it and the money and stuff isn't good to them and she said this this morning he's going to have an eruption every day he's just trying to sit there because he's kind of in a state of hell with this empire that wants to rule his life in a bunch of incompetent people and I'm going through it too and then he says we have to get in there and assist my people can't do it either unless they have cover to get these assholes engaging it relax the max that's probably Mac proper really they need to be engaged and it's happening it's taken forever and it used to be something that people actually do you can't count on it just happening and saying it is pretty brilliant and we see that his mom knows the stuff and he grew up paying attention they still help him in a situation is very bad and there's his and he feels really bad that they're diminishing further and then very smart and these mats are not so Swift and a bunch of Catholic bags they do their fix it with a Band-Aid it's going to be big maybe hahaha he's not going to get smaller he's laughing at them and they don't get it it's sort ofget it

Okay I was just sitting here blabbing the truth is you guys are not overcoming the empire at all you're not doing anything yet you haven't gotten him anything if the empire is not having you do and it's ridiculous you're weaklings and you're saying you're not you're running around all day screwing around with him messing up for the empire because you're going to be gone soon and they're going to get him stuff later am I not saying it right.

Mac Daddy

It's kind of like this I say it occasionally but really I can't hold on to it I'm blinded with rage and hate and yeah he's laughing at me cuz I can't hold my head up and that's what it is I know we're doing the extortion thing and he said yeah they have you doing it and they're not playing on doing it that way you idiot they're playing on doing the extortion thing they just don't tell me about it and that's the difference and the reason why they're doing that is to kill you he says and it's working you have to look at the fact that it's working and f*** you Trump you're dead f****** pile of s*** that we may have to push that you back on them to fight to take care of you because they did it to us and now you can go suck your cock Trump you f****** f**... So I do see there's a problem and just people and others pushed us back onto the back proper cuz we're bothering these guys and now we're stuck between them and the pseudo empire and it's not going well and I have to go to treatment and he says what the hell we do all that stuff and you go to treatment I'm starting to get something is actually going very badly and we can't raise our head against the empire and these guys are taking a territory and getting rid of us because we're useless in the foreigners are going to roll over us it makes a lot of sense but now we're over there we have a chance to fight the Mac proper and we're not doing anything here

Trump

You're very wealthy person and you're on the street all the time you're an embarrassment and you're humiliate yourself and others and he doesn't like you at all for it and you're a s*******. I'm tired of your dumbass you're a repulsive person and you're mean no matter what you're doing I've never seen this before you're like an animal you like a little coyote you're just some dumb ass s*** head it's kind of what you behave like we hate you everyone hates you and yeah you can't beat the empire bja can't seem to do anything outside of what they're doing and it's going to come along we'll do it and he'll say thanks for nothing and they're going to keep doing it and they're attackless and they're not smart anymore either

Mac Daddy

Really we're not doing the right thing and we said it earlier and it's true and these two are complete idiots they're spent and they're not even here you say it was shot like 2 hours ago he looks normal sounds it he's got like stage 5 cancer walking around like nothing's wrong yeah there's something wrong with that. So you see how hard it is and it's ridiculous now I'm going to be fighting these idiots in the four years foreigners but for real you guys can't do anything for him but we're in the way but you simply won't do anything anyways and Dolores gave him a grand and yeah it wasn't part of the plants we started harping on social security and got our asses kicked and we see that's against the plan but she can see what we're up to and other people and it's not stupid but hell you know we went the wrong way again and you say it too what am I supposed to do I want to survive and you guys are not doing the job at all this is ridiculous here and keep my head above water just barely and you should see what it's like he's angry as hell just telling people get out of my way you don't get out of the way you're going to get tortured and f****** kill and I noticed it's true and people have to start to do something different this a****** Trump is going out now to go bother people for Christ sakes somebody to stop him

Mac Daddy

Olympus

[chaand-jalne-laga]

CJL LIVE BLOG SEASON 1 [EPISODE 3]

Hi. Lol. Finally yaad aa gaya ki I have another blog. Hehe. :) Come. Let's begin.

So we are back to where we left them last. In each other's arms. Under the 'moon light'.

2. They come out of their two-seconds trance and Tara is shocked by the glitch of the moon dropping down in spite of taking so much of care. Deva too looks flabbergasted by the rate his heart is roaring. Lol. Whatever.

3. Chacha and chachiji are staring at them with a lot of sus. Kya bhai? Aise kya dekh rahe ho unko? Tumhare hone wali dammad hai namaste nahi karoge kya? Bloody manner-less people.

4. "Aap theek hain?" Kyunki mera dil toh bohot zor se dhadak raha hai. Lol. Yahin kehne wale the na tum Dev?

5. Hmm. Dev Malik? Did I miss his false first name? Lol. I don't even remember anything from the last epi. Folks. Please halpppp. Okay? Dev ka first name was there in the last epi? Batana niche.

6. Kind of cryptic lines tho. So. Tara. He is already dropping ~not-so-subtle~ hints for you and staring at you with that knowing gaze. So. Did you guess him? Did you? I think not. Whatever.

7. This lil sister is. Okay. I know she is kind and considerate and all that. But she is also really dumb. Aur cheekh ke bol pagal. Taaki usse sunai hi de jaye, bewakoof.

8. Kunwari Ananya. Lol. Chachiji is something y'all.

9. Lol. Yeh log kitna khush hoke apne-aap ko introduce kar rahe hain for a good first impression. They don't even know that the kid whose life was ruined because of them is the man standing in front of them. First impression kya last impression bhi already bani hui hai ji inki toh. Lol. Whatever.

10. Lol. But the way that bg dancer came and took Tara away from him. He is absolutely in love with her. But is also heavily broken.

11. This choreography sucks. Yeah. It could have been better. But nvm. *shrugs*

12. Tara ko shocked and intrigued dikhane ke chakkar mein they completely made her as if she unwilling to dance at all. Bilkul stoic and rigid and forced. Nvm. *shrugs*

13. And we see that brother (Rohan?) drinking and enjoying the party. Such an asshole. Took money from his sister and yet came to the party leaving behind his ailing father.

14. He is about to answer her third question but she spots her brother and now is in no mood to hear the answer.

15. Dev is heart broken and full of rage that Tara left him in the middle of him speaking.

16. I think that trauma incident has affected more than one person. Poor ailing Baba is roaming in the streets while hallucinating about that fire incident. Tara running around with her car trying to spot him. Really. Hats-off to all those children who are literally ready to go to hell for their parents. Tara has somehow created a soft-corner in my heart. Coz I have seen my father irl taking care of his ill mother doing everything to keep her fit too. And I too have the same sentiment towards my parents.

17. Dev is emotional seeing Tara in front of him after so many years. He really did miss her. See? He loves her. I said it already. He cannot just stop recalling those few moments he got with her.

18. And now that chaand has been neatly packed and placed in his car 'with love' by Shagun. He looks at it with a yearning.

19. Nothing seems to be working out for Tara as she is now frustrated to know that some 'ameer admi' from another sheher has bought Badshah.

20. And yahan pe our Dev is having repeated flashbacks of his tortured past and thus takes the jeep to a secluded place only to burn down the chaand kept in his car. So. There you have it. Chaand Jalne Laga. Quite literally. This show doesn't miss to promote it's name whether it be through dialogues or props used by the leads.

21. Wow. NGL but the ending of each of the episode is so damn freaking amazing tho. Ok bye. God bless you.

[mknight0000]

Cross-Dimensional Answers Prologue-Ch 1 (Last Legacy)

A/N: AAAAA I cannot believe this is happening!! So I am writing the events of LL from the perspective of my MC. Hopefully, you’ll get to know her as the story progresses and maybe grow to like her! Before we get started, I wanted to make a few things clear. 

I do want to preface that I am not the creator of LL (obviously). I am taking the story of LL and making just a few adjustments and additions here and there (for example: the setting of the expo). This is from the perspective of how i feel my MC experienced this story and if your interpretation of the events is different then that is totally okay! We all love and experience these routes differently so one interpretation does not discredit another. With the routes being on indefinite hiatus, when I get closer to the current state of the story, I will be taking some creative liberties on how the rest of the story folds out. This is not a story that will completely follow the events laid out for us, but a way for me to finish the story so I can have some sense of closure. Also there may be some instances that I may not fully know how things operate. I will try my best to do research and information digging, but I may have to make some guesses (ex. How a check in at a con works seeing as I’ve sadly never been to one) so you’ve been warned. 

 Listed below are the creators of LL. They worked so hard on the world and I want everyone to show them some love for it. I put a link to the LL carrd as well so that you can check out everyone’s socials (so many talented writers and artists worked very hard on this story so please go support them!). 

I do want to warn you that I am a beginner writer. I’ve only every written fictional stories for a few school assignments and for an application, so all the work I've done has been seen by very little people. If you have any constructive criticism, it is much appreciated, HOWEVER please do not send hate. It does not help anyone out, and if anything it hurts more then it helps so if you have any suggestions, feel free to DM me. 

With that very long A/N done and out of the way (don’t worry it won’t be like this in the next installments), let's get this party started!!

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-Word Count: 2,428

-Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of Food, Probably poor grammar (I try to proof read but my mind jumps a lot sooooo), 

-Creators: Dev (creator and writer), Ciel (sprites, cgs, illustrations), Hika (bgs, illustrations, gfx), Lulu (writer), and Grace (writer) 

-Carrd Link

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“Are you sure that you have everything packed for your first day? Your lunch and backpack are already packed, right? Do you have your supplies ready?” I ask hastily into my phone, briskly walking out of my hotel toward the convention center in hopes of being early. 

“Yes, yes i do, you don’t need to- hmph!” the voice on the other side exclaims suddenly. A crash sounds in the background, “Shit!”

I stop suddenly, concern lacing my voice, “Are you okay Tim? What happened?”

I hear a laugh come from the other side, after which I exhale a breath of relief.

“Yeah, I'm fine. I just tripped over my backpack is all, and I’ll be fine today,” Tim says as I hear the rustling of fabric, most likely putting on his school uniform jacket, “there’s no need to worry.” 

I quietly laugh and a small smile adorns my face, warmed by the thought of my caring brother as I continue my walk toward the convention center. As I get closer, I spot signs and billboards posted around the city of Orlando, advertising the event, indicating that I am getting closer to my destination.

“You know it’s my job to worry about you, right? I’d be a pretty bad caretaker if I didn’t. I mean it’s not every day that you start your Junior year!” I say into my phone, laughing slightly towards to end of my words knowing what his following reaction will be.  

“Yeah, totally, the thought of taking the SAT this year is soooo thrilling,” Tim says back, a smile hinted in his voice though his tone is of complete loathing, “Cannot wait to spend restless nights studying for probably one of the most important exams of my life, definitely no pressure.”

He is about to say something else when I hear another voice on the other end of the call.

“Is that Meg on the phone? Let me talk to her,” I hear a voice call from the other end.

“Ugh, hold on! Let me say goodbye to her before you steal my phone out of my hands!” Tim exclaims, frustration coating his words, “Well, Andy will probably hang up before giving the phone back so I hope you have a good time at the expo.”

“Thanks, Tim. Have a good first day. I know this’ll be your year, I can feel it. Just try to talk to some new people today, okay?”

A brief moment of silence comes from the other end.

“...Yeah okay,” he responds, hesitation clear in his voice, “I’ll call you when school gets out, alright? I love you.”

“Love you too.”

“Here’s Andy.”

I decide to stop and stand off to the side as silence fills the call, hearing the phone being transferred from Tim to my other brother.

“How is my wonderful sister doing this beautiful morning?” Andrew asks in a honeyed voice. I stand there, squinting my eyes, suspicion clear on my face.

“What do you need Andy?” I ask smirking, knowing that tone all too well.

“What?? I can’t ask how my talented, beautiful sister is doing this fine morning?”

I don’t even bother to respond.

“...Huh, I can never get anything past you, can I?”

“No, no you cannot,” I laugh.

Andrew laughs into the phone along with me.

“Well then, is there any chance that I can steal some of your muffins from your apartment? They’re the really tasty ones that I love and I can totally pay you back when you return,” asks Andrew.

I raise my eyebrow, “You promise to pay me back? Last time you said that it took you six months to repay me and you only did so because your own husband had to threaten you,” I state.

“Yes, yes I promise!” He pleads, “I’ll even pinky-promise if that helps!”

I laugh, “No, it's fine, you can take some.”

“Thanks, little sis-”

“We’ve had this discussion before, I’m not your little sis!” I exclaim into the phone, a couple sitting at a café table near me looking pointedly at me. I give them a shrug and mouth “sorry” to them.

“Yeah, you are.”

“Being older by 10 minutes does not count.”

“Yes it does,” he says with a smirk knowing he won the discussion, “Anyways, like Tim said, please try not to worry about us during the expo. I know it’s been a while since you’ve had time for just yourself so just please enjoy your time there, you deserve this,” he says in a gentle tone. 

“I will, thanks,” I say, grateful for my brothers’ concerns.

“Make sure to get some sweet pics of you in front of the expo with your cosplay, oh! and don’t forget the gift for Seb’s birthday, you know how much he loves those Reynold guitars. He’ll definitely freak out when he sees its from the OG shop” Andrew said excitedly.

“Will do. Also, you’re still picking me up Friday evening, right?”

“Yep! Meet you at the guest gate?”

“No, on the flight line–yes at the guest gate,” I laugh into the phone. “I’ll call you when I take a break for lunch, love you, Andy.”

“Love you, Meg, have fun, bye!”

“Will do, bye.”

I end the call and I put my phone back into my backpack. I look in the window in front of me to check over my cosplay before I step into the check-in line. My brown hair is pulled into a mid-ponytail with some strands hanging out of the front for style and is adorned with a crystal flower clip. Realistically wearing a ponytail in an actual fight wouldn’t end well but hey, I look cute so what the hell. I have on a white, dramatic, peter-pan collared blouse with adorable poufy sleeves that Lizzie let me borrow for the expo, which is paired with black trousers tucked into black combat boots. Styled with the blouse is a lightly boned, black stay that is tied up in the front. The outfit itself is pretty plain, however, the gems of the outfit include my handmade cloak and the faux sword hanging from my hip. The cloak, a deep, thick, navy blue fabric, layered with a sheet of moon and star embroidered lace on top, is secured in by gold trimmed edges surrounding the collar of the cape. On the back, there is a large, embroidered, golden Starsworn logo. The cloak, alongside my handmade worbla foam sword, was the most expensive and time-consuming part of the outfit. It took many sleepless nights and breaks during my work shifts to complete them. However, paired with the simple clothing choices, my outfit perfectly exhibits design aspects of the leaked art from the latest installment to the ultimate franchise, Last Legacy II: Ex Nihilo.

After my cosplay check-over, I put on the badge that I received in the mail a few weeks prior, and walk into the appropriate line outside the expo hall under a large, tan canopy leading to the entrance of the hall, shielding guests from the Flordia sun. Hanging from the canopy reads a sign: Welcome to FanExpo FantasyCon.  

I can’t believe it. I haven’t felt this excited in…years. 9 long, strenuous, exhausting years to be exact. It still feels like yesterday when I was neck deep in blankets on my bed, trying to distract myself from the collapsing world around me, when I stumbled across that review.

Despite its huge popularity, no one else in my friend group, other than Sebastian, really got into it, so the game has always been a little personal to me and allowed me to become distracted when I needed it the most.

I put my backpack down on the table once I get up to the security station so it can be checked, get my badge scanned, and walk through the metal detector to collect my bag on the other side and from there I enter into the hall.

As I walk in, I notice some familiar art from the previous Last Legacy game posted on the surrounding walls of a hallway. Smells of various food booths are posted at the other side of the expo hall, filling the very large room, and chatter from employees and guests alike echo throughout the area, creating an exciting buzz. Booths hawking various crafts are set up everywhere in the hall, from artists selling prints to various coding businesses and software developing systems advertising their companies. To my left, there is an entrance to a theatre-like room where i assume the main panel for today will be held later on.

Looking around, a a bright, wide smile adorns my face, and for the first time in a long time, pure joy fills my body. I was a little skeptical about coming to the expo when they announced it and released the ticket sales. Today is, after all, the first day of Tim’s new school year, and I haven’t been on a trip like this since before becoming Tim’s legal guardian five years ago, but after some convincing from everyone, Andy and James promising to look after him the next three days, and working extra hours to afford the tickets for access to the Mike Morrigan signing and costume costs, I went forward with buying the tickets. 

This was definitely worth it, I think to myself.

Before I explore the main hall, I decide to walk down the hallway filled with panels of art from various franchises. Various scenes and characters are depicted from floor to ceiling. Some of the art is the official art from franchises, whilst other wall panels consist of concept art and art made by other artists, all done by talented individuals.

As I’m walking down the hallway a familiar voice behind me catches my attention. 

“Wow! Your cosplay is amazing!”

I turn to see Celena, an incredibly talented cosplayer staring right in my direction with her deep magenta eyes (most likely from contacts). Her short, platinum white hair is adorned with an adorable bunny ear headband, which matches perfectly with her light purple dress topped with little bows in the front and a big bow in the back on top of her faux-bunny poof tail. She looks straight from the game itself, making it one of the reasons why she is my favorite cosplayer of all time. 

Emotionally and mentally, I’m screaming. 

And somehow, in some way, I am able to respond (almost) calmly and (almost) normally. 

“Oh my god, thank you so much! Yours is amazing as well! I mean your dress is to die for! Do you mind if I get a picture with you?” I ask, overthinking each word as it comes out of my mouth. 

“Of course! What’s your name?”

“Megan”

“Well nice to meet you, Megan,” she says with a smile, “And what job class are you?”

“I am a Starsworn Swordmaster,” I say, gesturing at the sword I have on my hip as we move closer to get both into frame. 

I hold up my phone and take a selfie of the two of us smiling, her holding up a peace sign. After the camera clicks, I put my phone back into my bag, and when I turn back to her, she is looking at the art on the wall behind me, causing me to turn to see what grabbed her attention, in turn seizing mine.

Before me stands two familiar characters from the first Last Legacy game: Magister Escell Mirun, on the left, and Ayanna Anka, on the right. Though most of the internet is enthralled and obsessed with him, I’m not particularly a fan of the Battlemage and his cliché vain, and scheming personality. On the poster, Escell’s long purply-black hair is tied into a loose, low ponytail and it, along with his blue and green uniform with gold, accents, flows in the breeze as he stretches his pale hand outwards, imitating a spell being cast. On the right, the clever and cunning Engineer, Ayanna, stands facing away from the photo but looking back over her shoulder with her sharp, yellow cat-like eyes and iconic smirk. Her hair, put up into various thin braids, and ends highlighted in purple, lays below her large, poufy cat ears and her brown and gold-lined goggles. Her Ilpheta marks adorn her face on top of her dark brown skin, and her brown and tan striped tail curls upward. Though I love Ayanna’s character, I can’t help but question the developer’s choice in costuming, but nonetheless, I adore her.

I laugh to myself, remembering a past night during Freshman year in college when Sebastian and I discussed…funny ideas surrounding Last Legacy’s characters. 

I decide to let Celena in on one of our comments, turning around, asking, “Hey don’t you think Escell would look amazing in a chainmail bikini-” I stop abruptly. 

I look around and realize that I am now alone.

That’s weird, I could’ve sworn this hallway was packed with people a couple of seconds ago. 

Not only am I alone, but the chatter from the main hall is gone as well. 

“Hello? Celena? Anyone?” I call out. 

No answer. 

My breathing starts to become heavier, and I feel myself becoming colder, a clear sign of my nervousness and fear starting to show. Panic rises in my chest. The same feelings I had that night nine years ago start up.

What the hell? What the hell? What the- No don’t panic, Megan. Just- Just stay calm, maybe everyone is in the theatre for the panel? Or–

My thoughts are interrupted when a small thud sounds from in front of me. A long, multi-chrome staff rolls my way, pushed by seemingly nothing. The staff is adorned by gold accents and dangles, with a glowing crystal perched at the top, encased by gold circles, crossing over each other.

“Woah…is that…the Astrolabe?” I ask myself. 

The legendary relic lies before me while I try to understand my current situation. With the amount of detail this prop has, there is no way this is anyone’s ordinary cosplay prop. 

I look around to see if there is any clear indication of who it belongs to but no one seems to step forwards to claim it. 

With the intent to return this to whoever dropped it, I take a few steps forward, toward the staff, and reach down to pick it up. Once my fingers touch the cool, metal base of the shaft, light protrudes from the crystal laid in the center, and white light fills my vision. I try to move my hand back but clearly, it is too late. 

The hall and all the sense associated with it disappear from me and are replaced by small, shimmering balls of light. And then nothingness swallows me whole.

And then nothingness swallows me whole.

to be continued...

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Edit: Changed a few things for flow and some minor spell check

AAAAAAAAA I cannot believe this, this is so insane. This is the first time I've ever posted my writing!!! AAAAAA

[izacore]

I was the anon who talked about the teams monitoring and I loved your answer, thank you! I didn't take it as being attacked at all. Truthfully, I feel out of my depth and am trying to catch up to the wealth of info out here so it was very helpful to get some perspective. I didn't even know about the anons during BG or any of the previous stunts. That is fascinating!

I absolutely do not think Harry is an asshole at all (at ALL). I think he cares too deeply, and has a separation and maybe allows his team way too much leeway so he can have a true private life. I think he's incredible and I would never want to imply that he's callous in any way. I just... you know, I guess my hope is that his moods don't go up and down with the fandom or gp perspective on him because that makes me sad, ya know? Although seeing the new pics from DM today made my heart break; he looks absolutely miserable and exhausted.

I guess what I was trying to say is that it's incredibly tough to be a celebrity, especially someone at Harry's level of fame. Nothing he does is going to appease everyone. But what you said about him allowing his name to be dragged through the mud -- that hit me. I totally agree. I hope he's able to wrest some control back from this insane situation.

(For context, I'm a public figure myself [hence, anon] so I have a lot of compassion for people who are in the spotlight. You really have to disconnect. No reading reviews. No allowing that to enter your space. Same with my celeb friends. It's like... you just can't get pulled in! So yeah, I hope he's okay. I hope his team is protecting him, but likely, they're not. It all just makes me sad.)

Sorry my asks are so long and thank you for your patience!

Hi, thanks again for coming back! Yes, the amount of information to catch up on is really overwhelming so I understand how hard it is to get through and to all the details. Let me know if you'll ever need anything, I will try to provide links 😊

It's nice that you explained your perspective and I can see where we are coming from. I'd even say that we more or less on the same page. I absolutely agree with it being better for him to not really be heavily on social media when people are unfairly shitting on him. I also don't think he isn't going to appease everyone, but where the problem actually is here, is that hshq certainly tries. They want everyone to have a piece of him, not taking a stand and now, in this situation with holivia, imo they lost the plot and decided to associate Harry with wrong person with completely deranged values who very visibly negatively influences his emotional well-being. That's why in some way I consider it a win that even his het fandom is voicing their displeasure, because if there's chance for anything to wake hshq up it's the threat of damaging their business.

However, knowing how miserable the last 2 years were and they did nothing to take care of Harry as a person and a brand I am not hoping for much. I just feel sorry for him that the reputation and positive recognition he has been building for himself were all tarnished for... this woman. He gained nothing from it and if I were him I'd have more whole team fired on the spot.

I guess the conclusion would be that while yes, it is important for celebs to detach from how people perceive them (I can't even imagine to be under the constant scrutiny), in this case Harry's team should get to work and actually do something about people tarnishing his name and brand because of one, insignificant, failed, lying, wannabe actress.

Anyway, my rant got long too haha, glad there weren't any hard feelings and feel free to drop anytime 😊

[angelanimedesaray]

Wings in the Dark Chapter 3:  Quicksand

AN:  Okay, so this admittedly goes a little slow at the very beginning, more snooping and such, but I promise it picks back up about halfway through.  And will pick up from here on out.

Characters:  Levi, Vampire!Reader, Erwin, numerous BG characters

Pairing:  (Eventual) Levi x Vampire!Reader

Warnings:  Language, Peril (Temporary)

Word Count:  6940

<----Previous Chapter    Masterlist    Next Chapter---->

*Levi’s POV*

You could tell a lot about a person from how they treated animals.

For the Scouts, it was the horses especially that mattered, as they were one of the few lifelines out beyond the walls.  With how the horses had avoided L/N with everything they had, people in the vicinity would mutter about how she would never go beyond the walls at this rate, or how she had to be a bad person and the horses were sensing it.

That was one theory to go with.

However, as Levi continued to watch her, he never once saw her get angry or frustrated with them.  Sometimes there was sadness, or it looked like she was on the edge of admitting defeat, but she continued to approach them with patient understanding, as if she knew exactly what they were afraid of, and was asking them not to be because she couldn’t change it.

Gradually, the dappled grey allowed her to come closer and closer.  They started having problems giving someone else the job of cleaning the stables because she was spending so much of her free time in there, and she would clean while there to allow her to spend more time around the horses and give her something else to do besides just sitting there waiting for skittish horses to calm down.  She was smart enough to know that she needed more than just one to calm down around her, though she was still putting in the work to form a bond with at least one.  In case she was ever in a position where she needed another horse, though, it seemed she wanted the other horses to at least be comfortable with her presence--hence all the time spent in the stables.

If she wasn’t out in the field walking with the mare, then she was inside by the horse’s stall, leaning against the wall or sitting against the door.  Then, at long last, she could be seen walking around side by side with her horse, the lead short and fairly loose.  And after a few days holding a treat into the stall and waiting for the horse to feel comfortable coming up to her to eat it out of her hand, she finally made it /into/ the stall.  Her hard work was paying off, as now she could be found inside the stall, gently brushing the dappled grey mare while she spoke in soft tones to the horse, continuing to build up the trust and bond between the two of them.

As Levi stepped into the stables, he could hear her speaking softly with the mare, her words underlined with each thoughtful brush stroke.

“There we go...that’s a good girl...see, just like I said, nothing to be afraid of.  I know I’m scary, you all remind me every time I come in here, but I’m not going to hurt you.  I don’t want to hurt anyone--I’m just here to help.  See, that feels much better, doesn’t it?  I’m not going to hurt you.  I promise as long as I’m around, nothing’s going to hurt you.  There we go...Steady...Shh…”

Levi’s head turned slightly at the subject of her rambling, his gaze following down the line until he spotted the stall his horse was in, not far from L/N’s horse.

“You don’t mind all my rambling, do you, Zephyr?  It’s nice to talk to someone, even if they’re not going to talk back.  I haven’t had anyone to talk to in…”  She grew quiet, and even the brushing stopped for a moment.  Curious.  “...too long,” she finished, her voice hardly above a whisper.

She seemed to quiet down entirely as Levi risked stepping into the stables, and he realized he had been heard, or at the very least she’d become aware she wasn’t by herself.  Continuing forward casually, Levi turned his head to look into the stable as he passed, spotting L/N with the brush set off to the side and currently working on undoing any tangles in Zephyr’s mane.  Their eyes met for a moment, and Levi paused.

“Will she let you ride her, yet?”

She turned away, the faintest touch of red entering her cheeks at the mention of her trouble with the horses.  “Not yet.  But I don’t think it will be much longer before she does.”

Levi’s gaze swept over the stable, kept immensely clean with fresh straw, water, and food, and the coat on the horse smooth and lustrous.  At this rate, the mare was going to be more of a show horse than a war horse.

“You’re not slacking anywhere else, are you?” Levi asked as his gaze slipped over the pristine stall and back to her.  A stall didn’t get that clean without a lot of constant work.

“No, sir.  This is where I was lacking the most, so it’s getting more of my attention.  But I’m making sure other parts of my training aren’t suffering.”

Well, he’d be the judge of that.  With the way she held up in training, any degree of slipping would be easy to spot.

Levi resumed what he was doing, walking deeper into the stables to check on his horse, which he planned to take for a brief ride to stretch his legs.  “Don’t make a promise you can’t keep,” he added before L/N left his field of vision.  The stable was quiet for a few moments, broken only by the sound of Levi getting his horse ready to go.

So quietly he almost didn’t hear it, Levi got a reply.

“This one I can keep.”

Earlier in the day, Levi had jumped on the chance to get a more personal glimpse at L/N, taking over the cleanliness checks in the barracks, much to everyone else’s dismay.  He was well aware that his standards were far above everyone else’s, but today they were just going to have to deal with it, and step it up.  On the bright side, as he walked down the lines of beds, he was able to see who was terrible at doing a decent cleaning job and who had potential.

He gave criticisms at every bed--dust, missed spots, trying to hide part of the mess under the beds, half-assed jobs, on and on the list went.  When he got to L/N…

Now this was starting to get creepy.

His practiced eye swept over her space as she stood at attention just off to the side, taking in the bed spread smoothed of wrinkles, the dusted and wiped down surfaces, everything tucked away, floor swept and clean in her area--even a little into the surrounding spaces.  There wasn’t anything in the way of personal effects, though--not out in the open, anyway.

It was immaculate.  Up to his standards practically to a T.  It was an unexpected discovery, amongst the many things he thought he’d see.  He thought he might see a personal effect here or there that would give him a bit more on her personality, but there was nothing he could see during a cleanliness inspection.

He’d have to come back later.

Shit, I’m starting to sound like a goddamn stalker.

Carefully, Levi ran a hand on the underside of the bed, the nightstand, anywhere there might be dirt left over, and came away with nothing.

She was the only one he walked by without saying anything, because he had no critiques to give.  He wondered if she was always this clean, or she’d heard he was doing the inspections and pulled off a miracle.

He went back when there was no one around to do a more thorough search, still believing that she might have something that would tip him off a little more.  Frankly, if he continued to find a complete lack of personal effects, that would bolster his suspicions as well, because it signified something to be hidden or something that was trying to be forgotten, or a preparation to run at a moment’s notice.

He didn’t know what he would find, if anything, but if it was another lead, he would take it.

The barracks were currently empty, and he had made sure they’d be empty for a while, choosing the time there was a morning drill going on for the new recruits to sneak in and do some digging.

First he checked the footlocker at the end of her bed, opening it up and carefully shifting through.  Mostly it was made up of uniform clothes, a pair of nice plainclothes, a pair of casual plainclothes, a couple more comfortable workout clothes, a plain black cloak--

His hand paused on the cloak.  It looked like it could be the one being worn by the person he’d pursued and lost that one night.  Not a confirmation, but it was further evidence she was sneaking out at night, even if he hadn’t seen her face.

Finding nothing else suspicious in the footlocker, Levi checked under the bed and found only dress shoes and casual shoes, and then moved onto the nightstand.

Here, he found a book from the library on herbology with a bookmark on custom tea blends, as well as a tin of some of the said tins.  There was quite a bit of chamomile and mint from the whiff he was immediately hit with upon checking inside the tin, with a couple other blends--but mostly the chamomile and mint.  Inside, he also found a tightly bound bundle of white sage in a cloth covering, blank sheets of paper, more writing utensils than he would have expected, and a leather bound folio.  Opening it revealed no official documents missing from her background, no personal letters or intercepted reports.

Inside, it was gorgeous artwork.  Sketches of the horses in various poses of rest or activity, of the scenery around Wall Rose, a sketch of one of the few mansions in the district, and--

Levi paused, eyes widening as he stilled, the silence in the room pressing in on him.  His mind flashed back to just the other day, when he’d seen Zephyr out in the field away from the other horses, laying down and looking contently about, but not moving.  He’d only been able to make out part of L/N through the long grass, leaning against the horse with her knees pulled up, looking lost in something.  He’d assumed it was a book from the distance where he was once more leaning against the wall in the shadows of the stables, or that she was writing something.

Amongst the more recent drawings of the horses, there was a portrait of him, leaning against that wall at the stables, arms crossed, head slightly bowed but eyes centered on the observer, or, in this case, the artist.  Even the shade was accounted for, making the features a little more difficult to make out, but they were still clear and detailed.

She’d seen him well enough at that distance to make out and sketch his features in this detail?  Or had some of it been visualization?

More importantly, it was pretty much confirmation that she knew he was watching her.

Levi closed the folio, putting everything back in its proper place with care, feeling intrusive and out of place now that he’d failed to come up with anything malicious in nature.  There were only a couple things that made him uneasy with the implications, never anything that proved to be outright dangerous, as always.  And he couldn’t exactly say anything about the sketch of himself without her knowing he’d gone through her belongings.

Levi was gone long before the recruits returned to the barracks from their drill.

She’d slipped away from the main group after the next combat training session, hanging back and going a different direction than the rest of the group.  Levi had a brief moment where he thought she might be slipping away to the same place she went at night, and had followed her on the off chance that was the case.

She ended up going to a quiet corner of the Scout headquarters, at a corner of buildings near the forest that no one bothered with.  Once there, she kneeled down, tending to a cluster of plants that was lined up in the familiar form of a small garden.  It was fairly new, too, from what Levi could see, which told him she probably planted them herself not too long ago.  How long had she been working on this little side project?

Just another one of his suspicions turning out to be harmless activity.  He was just about ready to write off his uneasy feeling as paranoia.

He could have just walked off and left her alone, but he lingered, waiting until she finished what she was doing and left before he quietly approached the garden to satiate his own curiosity.

Kneeling down, he realized that the tiny garden was made up of plants, mainly herbs, that could be used in tea making.  There were brushes of mint, chamomile, and lemongrass as the most notable plants, and near the corner where they would get full sun and could help hide the little herb garden there were even three freshly planted bushes, hibiscus, raspberry, and rose, with the flowering bushes meant to support the raspberry in the middle.  The soil was dark and the leaves had beads of water still on them that shined on his thumb after a careful stroke against a leaf to see it healthy and strong, showing that L/N had been by to water them.  They were doing fairly well, from what he could see, even though the plants were too young to harvest anything from.

Was she attempting to grow the materials to make her own tea blends so she wouldn’t have to spend much of her salary on tea?

Standing to leave as that pesky feeling of intrusion started to worm its way back into his mind, Levi caught sight of a small collection of white sage, directly out in the sun and recently planted, but noticeably far away from the other plants.  It was curious, the way it was planted so that it couldn’t be missed and could be easily avoided.  At the same time, though, it could just have been an aggressively growing plant that would take over the other plants if it got too close to them.  While he knew it could also be used in teas, it wasn’t as common...and he’d seen a bundle of the sage spikes tightly bound and covered in her nightstand.

What was so special about it?  Why did she have it?

Levi shook his head, turning to leave and mentally filing the questions about the white sage under “personal questions” instead of “suspicions.”

His suspicions weren’t entirely gone.  While he was getting a stronger sense of her character that caused his doubts about her to waver, he still had some glaring questions he couldn’t ignore that caused his wariness to endure...for now.

ODM gear training--another essential part to life in the Scouts.  At this point in time, it was a chance for officers to get a feel for the skills of the cadets first hand instead of just what it said on paper about their Cadet Corps training.

The trees here were thick, allowing perfect cover for their Titan dummies spread sporadically throughout the woods.  At the highest points in the trees, the officers stood on platforms to observe quietly, moving from platform to platform as needed while the recruits moved through the trees, watching the cadets zip around the forest looking for Titans.

Levi’s eyes, however, were drawn to the fact that Erwin was out here.  He knew for a fact that Erwin had better things to be doing than watching rookies try to hunt down dummies, but for some reason he was always near the same spot Levi was, his gaze fixed complacently in the same area, flickering in disinterest past most of the cadets.  If any of the rookies knew he was here, the word would spread like wildfire, and they might shift their attention to trying their damndest to impress the Commander instead of doing the drill properly.

But there was a gleam in Erwin’s eyes.  He was here for a reason.  Levi just didn’t know what it was, which unsettled him, but didn’t distract him from watching the recruits.

Erwin’s gaze caught Levi’s, and the faintest, unsettling smile appeared on his lips, gone in the next second as his attention was drawn towards an oncoming recruit who was high in the trees, apparently trying the high-ground tactic to spot a Titan before the others.  A terrible approach, really, since it allowed more tree cover for the Titans by adding more branches and foliage below the individual.

Levi started to turn away in disinterest, hearing the sound of another fast-approaching recruit coming towards them.  While the recruit was still in his peripherals, they disengaged the cables, ready to fire them into another tree to make a sharp turn.

Except the cables didn’t deploy.

The recruit let out a shriek and plummeted towards the ground from a dangerous height, gear malfunctioning and not sending out the cables to catch them on their way down.  Levi whipped around, hands flying out to his holstered ODM controls--

--Erwin didn’t look surprised by what was happening--

Someone darted in low and fast.  It was one of the recruits, the one that had already been moving in their direction, and as such, was in the best position to react first.

Of all the people it could have been, it was L/N.

She wasn’t using any gas, her falling momentum casing her to come in low and fast to the ground, cables deploying at the last moment to even out her fall and propel her forward, her back running parallel with the ground as she shot towards the falling cadet.  When she was close enough, she angled herself back up to intercept the recruit, gas propelling her up into the air instead of her momentum.  There was an audible thud and grunt as they collided, L/N’s arm wrapped around the fallen recruit’s midriff as she twisted to fire another cable to bring herself up to safety.

The only problem was that there were two dummies in the direction she was flying, and the training didn’t stop because of a hiccup.

One of the dummies swung down and towards her, on a clear collision course if she didn’t see it and couldn’t react fast enough.  At least now it would hurt like a bitch but it wouldn’t be fatal.

L/N let loose a sudden burst of gas to speed up and rolled so she was facing the ground, back upwards and exposed to the falling dummy.  For a second, he thought she was going to take the brunt of the blow--which would mean death if this had been real.  She pulled herself upright at the last second, sailing right underneath where the dummy titan’s mouth would be, her body twisted out of reach of the dummy, and she kicked off the side of its neck to give herself another boost, cables firing upwards high into the trees and causing her to sore upwards, another brief burst of gas allowing her the momentum to keep her going upwards with the added weight still tucked against her side with one arm.

The second dummy swung out from behind the trees, fast enough to knock someone clean out of the air.  Instead of going under like she did the first time, she twisted again, keeping the recruit in her arms safe from impact.  She arched over him in an upside U, cables firing up and out to bring them safely onto a tree branch.  She set the other recruit down, a hand on their shoulder as she said something to them, checking their gear with them before waving for one of the other officers to come over and get the recruit.  Once the recruit who fell was guaranteed to be alright, she kicked off, doubling back to slice through the Titan dummy napes before disappearing back into the forest.

Levi looked back over at Erwin, able to immediately recognize that gleam in his eyes as Erwin looked out in the direction L/N had taken off towards.  It was the same look Levi saw in the Underground, back when they met.  Ulterior intentions or not, Erwin was going to do his damndest to make sure she was on their side in the end, and speaking from experience, Levi knew it was possible.

Releasing his grip on his ODM controls, Levi’s gaze flickered back over to the recruit that had fallen, that look he’d seen on Erwin’s face moments before it happened flashing through his mind.

I know you can’t guarantee finding the answers to all of your questions in such a short amount of time, but you could at least find out if she will have the back of her fellow scouts on the first expedition.

That had been planned, hadn’t it?  He wanted to test if she had her comrades backs in a moment of danger, and she had responded immediately and without hesitation.  Levi had to trust that there had been some kind of backup plan to make sure that recruit didn’t end up dead--Erwin wouldn’t have done something like that without having someone waiting in the wings in case L/N acted selfishly.

He was sure everyone was impressed after what she’d just pulled off even with someone under her arm, but part of him...wasn’t really surprised.  Then again, Levi was the only one who’d had a first hand taste of how strong she really was.  This was a reassurance that her other training had not slipped while she put so much effort into the horses, and was further confirmation at the asset she could be to them as a member of the Scouts.

Let’s hope she could keep that even head when it was Titan jaws snapping at her and not just wooden figures swinging her way.

He felt absolutely drained.

It was the night before the next expedition, and Levi found himself sitting alone in the mess hall, a cup of steaming tea resting on the table in front of him with his fingertips lingering lightly on the rim of the cup.  Ever since that first night he’d caught L/N sneaking out, he’d been staying up as much as possible to try and catch her sneaking out again.  He was already used to not sleeping much, but even he had his limits.  His eyelids were heavy, and his focus kept slipping, even as he tried to get down a cup of tea to help him sleep more soundly tonight so he would be at his best tomorrow.

He would finally get to see L/N in the field.  Erwin was still planning on keeping her in the formation where Levi would have her in his sights at all time so he could see how she did when it wasn’t training anymore.  Not to mention, he was looking forward to it.

His suspicions had started to die down in the back of his mind, giving way to glowing embers of a curiosity he figured would be satiated with time.  Perhaps that uneasiness in his gut had nothing to do with her trustworthiness, and he had simply been caught off guard by her abilities.  Perhaps the thought of a rookie already able to go toe to toe with him had unnerved him, and that was where the feeling originated.

The more he pried into her as a person, the less of a reason he found to be doubtful of her intentions.  The recruits who’d been in class with her had described her as cold and unsociable, someone up to trouble that was never discovered and far more skilled than she let on.  However, when he observed her and came within proximity to her, she was warm, and careful, and considerate, although he still did not miss the hesitation, the way she was ready to pull away at a moment’s notice and increase the distance once more, the way she seemed to always be holding something back…

But that didn’t mean she was a bad person.  If anything, he was worried about her because she seemed far more empathetic under the surface than she let on.  He’d seen the garden she tended to quietly, seen her artistic hobby, seen how she interacted with her horse Zephyr now that she was able to ride the mare.  Even if she didn’t have any close friends in the Scouts, she was close with that horse, spending most of her free time with Zephyr, brushing her, laying with her in the field while she drew or read, simply walking with her.

She seemed...gentle, at heart.  Before he knew it, he was softening towards her.  How could he see all of that, and not start to let go of his suspicions?  It’s why watching her had suddenly felt intrusive, why this final night he had stopped staring out the window watching for a hooded figure and come into the mess hall to seek tea to help him sleep instead of forcing himself to stay up all night again to keep an eye out for her slipping out into the night.

The silence was comforting, his limbs feeling heavy, head tilting downwards, fingers going limp around the empty cup as he slowly...nodded off…

He was so exhausted...

*Reader’s POV*

Your steps down the darkened halls of the Scout Headquarters were silent, your hood still drawn as you made your way deeper into the stone building.  While your face was still hidden in shadow, your hand did a careful rub around your mouth to be sure that you didn’t have any trace of your meal lingering on your face.

You hadn’t needed to sneak out for another bite, but considering you were going on an expedition tomorrow, you’d decided to play it safe and sneak out again to make sure you were fully satiated.  You needed to be at peak performance, and you needed to make sure your bloodlust was fully satiated in case you found yourself in the middle of a bloodbath.

The last thing you needed was to lose control in front of everyone and feed off of a fellow Scout.  All the pleading and rationalizing in the world wasn’t going to save you from a vengeful blade or banishment in that kind of situation.

Once you were sure there wasn’t any blood on your face, you lowered your hood, quietly making your way into the barracks and retrieving one of your bought chamomile tea bags before slipping away to the mess hall.  The only sounds in the castle was the faint talking of guards at the entrance, the huffs or snickers of the horses in the stables, and the soft breaths and heartbeats of the sleeping scouts that filled Headquarters.

The closer you got to the mess hall, however, the more you could make out a singular heartbeat and soft breathing, the familiar sound of someone fast asleep.

In the mess hall?

Once you were close enough, you managed to catch the faintest scent that immediately told you who was asleep in the mess hall.  That scent had been following you since your sparring match.  It had wafted on the wind from the distance as he watched you from beside the stables or across training grounds, had lingered on your personal effects after you came back from a morning drill, had briefly lingered amongst the perfume of herbs and flowery plants in your little garden, and had cut through your senses the last time you’d snuck out for a bite, informing you that you were being followed long before you heard his breaths and heartbeat.

You’d known Captain Levi was watching you closely, and as such, you’d learned to attune yourself to his scent so you would know when he was nearby.  He was always clean, with traces of tea and mint lingering despite the strong scent of soap, either from cleaning his surroundings or himself.  But there was also the scent of his blood, sometimes unique for people with potent bloodlines, whose blood would be exceptional if you dared to partake.

Of course, Captain Levi, Commander Erwin, any of the Scouts were a hard off limits, so that was never something you were going to give into, never a taste that you would know.  But that didn’t mean you would fail to pick up on the rich aroma his blood gave off.

God forbid his blood was ever spilled in front of you.  That would be a challenge to resist.

Able to tell that he was asleep, you entered the mess hall quietly but without reservations, determined to make your cup of tea even if there was someone else in the room.

He seemed to have fallen asleep at the table, head slumped over into his chest, one arm still lying limply next to a cup of tea that, due to the scent that still had traces in the air, had been meant to help him sleep.  His hair fell carefree into his face, lips parted slightly for his quiet breaths to slip between.

Good.  He’d been looking exhausted recently, and you knew it was because he was keeping such a close eye on you.  It was almost like you couldn’t go anywhere without Levi one step behind you.  The rumors said it was because he was thinking of having you join his squad, but you doubted that was really the reason.  Your suspicion was that he’d grown suspicious of you after your spar, and he was trying to figure out what you were hiding.  If he’d simply been looking to have you on his squad, he wouldn’t have gone poking around your personal effects or been following you whenever you were by yourself.

You didn’t hate him for it--he was just doing his job, and he had every right to be suspicious.  Hell, if his instincts had told him there was something wrong with you, that there was something dangerous about you, they weren’t wrong.  He was right to follow them and poke around.  It was just for your own sake that you hoped you could dodge him until his suspicions disappeared and he could accept you weren’t here out of malice.

You really were here to help.  Your intentions were genuine, even if you had some personal monsters you were trying to keep in the dark.  You just weren’t so sure you could convince them that you weren’t a threat if they were to ever find out what you were.  You didn't even want to think of what Captain Levi’s reaction would be if he ever found out, especially if he found out while armed and in the same room as you.

There were already those who knew about your species, and considered you to be a far more lethal threat to humanity than Titans, one that needed to be expunged indiscriminately.  The fear was always there that if someone discovered you, they would see things that way, that they wouldn’t hesitate to put down a clear threat to humanity.

Shaking the dark thoughts from your mind, you focused on the here and now instead of what ifs that might never come to pass.  Instead, you carefully removed your cloak from around your shoulders and approached Levi quietly and carefully, draping the dark cloth around his body to keep him covered up.

You’d just been outside, so of course you were aware that it wasn’t the warmest night.

You paused just short of lifting your hands, hearing a shift in his heartbeat and breathing that suggested he might wake up.  It figured he would be a light sleeper.  Maybe you should have just left him alone instead of risking waking him up.

Well, either way, it would be more awkward if he woke to you just standing there next to him--if he did wake up.  There was still the chance he would slip back into sleep.

Attempting to stay silent so you wouldn’t disturb him anymore than you already had, you slipped away into the kitchen, going about making your cup of tea as quietly as you could, movements exaggerated with how slow you were going in an attempt not to let the kettle and other dishes rattle.  While you made your tea, you could hear the slightest shift of fabric, hear a pause, his heart rate and breathing back to normal waking pace.

Well, shit.  It looked like you’d managed to wake him up with your act of kindness now gone wrong.  You should have left him alone instead of disturbing his sleep.  And now you were going to have to be social when you left the kitchen.

Well...maybe that was a good thing.  With all this watching from a distance, maybe it would help to put his mind at ease if he was to simply talk to you, just a little.

Though you could also very likely end up headed towards a conversation you weren’t ready to have, one you couldn’t answer even though they were so simple, like ‘where did you come from’ and anything related to family.

You let out a soft sigh as you poured your tea into your cup, resigning yourself to the incoming late night conversation with Captain Levi.

As you walked back into the eating area of the mess hall where Levi had fallen asleep, you could see him sitting up properly again, your cape folded up neatly and sitting on the tabletop with his hand resting thoughtfully in its center, a small frown on his lips.

He looked up when you entered the room, and something flashed in his eyes, gone as soon as it appeared.  It made you uneasy.

Was there blood on your cape?  No, you were certain there wasn’t any blood--you knew what you were doing, and you knew how to eat without spilling any blood or making a mess.  There wasn’t any blood on your cape.  So what was that look for?  Was it just from his suspicions?  Had he figured you had just come back from sneaking out again?

“What are you doing up?” Levi asked bluntly as you approached, teacup in hand

As much as you wanted to turn the question around on him, the one who had fallen asleep in the mess hall, you knew better.  You were trying to stay on his good side, not antagonize him, which was already difficult when the odds were already so stacked against you.

You took a seat, raising the cup slightly as both your hands curled around the hot cup to cradle it in your grasp.  “I was feeling restless, so I came down here to get something to calm my nerves,” you told him honestly, taking a slow sip of tea once you’d finished speaking.

“And you felt the need for a cloak on the way from the barracks to the kitchen?” Levi asked skeptically, eyebrow cocked challengingly.

You shrugged, outwardly unfazed by his question.  “I tried walking it off first.  Didn’t work out like I’d hoped.”

“Are you nervous?”

Your eyes flickered his way, meeting his steady gaze and briefly wondering if he was actually referring to tomorrow, or if that was meant to double as referring to him always watching her, asking if she had a reason to be nervous about it.

“I suppose I should be.  Afraid, even.  But whenever I start to get worried I tell myself whatever happens, happens.  I’ll do what I can, when I can.  If I come back, wonderful, if I don’t...I won’t be going out quietly,” you said, grip tightening slightly around the cup as you stared down at the water colored by the chamomile blend.  “Maybe subconsciously I am nervous, and that’s why I’m restless tonight.”

Levi was fixing you with a hard look at your rather passive answer, eyes probing, reading every muscle twitch looking for a lie or a deeper meaning.  “Aren’t you itching to kill Titans?  Or at least shitting yourself at the chance to go outside the walls?”

“Except I didn’t come to kill Titans, specifically.  Going outside the walls, seeing what’s out there, that’s a bonus.  I came to help.  Whether that means killing Titans, guarding carts, playing messenger or lookout, or mucking out stalls.  As long as I feel like I’m doing something to help.”

Levi leaned back in his seat.  He didn’t look particularly impressed with your attitude.  “Why did you join the Scouts?” he asked bluntly.  “Why not the MPs or the Garrison?”

Images flashed through your mind.  Drunken garrison members stationed in Wall Rose who only sat around gambling, drinking, and ignoring their duties.  Your eyes lifted to the raven-haired man in front of you, and you had the faintest memory pass through your mind of a black haired youth pressed into the ground by Military Police, about to beat the kid to a pulp to teach the Underground gutter rat not to steal, even though it was the only way the kid was going to get something to eat.  Corruption, complacency, and current uselessness in the fight against the Titans, that’s all you thought when you heard Military Police or Garrison Regiment.  You knew it was a harsh viewpoint, and a blanket one that didn’t truly apply to everyone in either branch, but that impression had been made so strongly on you that you couldn’t resolve it, not at this point.

Also, this was a good chance to plant the seed that she really did want to help, that she really was an ally and not an enemy.  Just in case she was found out.

“I wanted to go somewhere I could actually do something, where I could put my skills to good use and do something worthwhile.  I know that’s not the general public feeling about what the Scouts do, but I knew if I went to the Garrison or the MPs, I’d be wasted there.  Complacency isn’t for me.  I knew the Scouts was the best place for me to go if I wanted to do something that could actually help.”

You quieted again, taking another sip from the cup.  Once more, it was true.  If you wanted to use your vampiric abilities to make a difference, the Scouts was the best place for you.  You were tired of existing in shadows, of letting days slip by without making any kind of impact on the world around you.  No more complacency.  You wanted to take action and do something with your abilities other than hunt and eat people.  What better way than to go out and fight the Titans?  They were still a threat to you, you couldn’t regenerate like a Titan, and decapitation from teeth would kill you just as surely as a stake through the heart.  But you had a better chance against the Titans than the average human, and you wanted to use your better chances to give humanity a better opportunity to fight back.  That would make your existence feel...worthwhile.  Instead of parasitic.

Down at the other end of the table, Levi sighed, pushing himself up onto his feet, likely to head back to his room before he fell asleep in the mess hall again.

*Levi’s POV*

Levi wasn’t too enthused by most of her reasoning for joining the Scouts.  He had seen far too many pointless deaths to optimistically say that she wouldn’t die pointlessly in the Scouts.  Hell, she had a higher chance of dying needlessly in the Scouts than anywhere else, especially if she had the wrong attitude going out there.  A hero complex could get her killed just as easily as complacency.  She should be focused on survival, and how casually she spoke about what could happen tomorrow made him uncomfortable.  He’d be more at ease if she was displaying a determination to come back, some kind of fire, a spark.  Instead, it felt like she thought there was something she needed to prove, and he worried it was the wrong priority.

Hopefully, her attitude would change once she saw the hell of the Titans up close.  If not, he wasn’t going to have much hope for her going forward.

Getting to his feet, Levi grabbed his teacup to clean up in his chambers, leaving the cloak folded on the table for her to retrieve when she was finished down here.

“Make sure you come back to tend to those plants.  They’ll die if there’s not someone around to take care of them,” he said in a monotone voice before turning to leave.  He made it almost to the door before she spoke up again.

“Captain Levi?”

He paused, but he didn’t turn or say anything, waiting to hear what she wanted to say.

“Just because I’m not open with everyone, doesn’t mean I’m a threat.  There’s just some parts of myself I would like to keep to myself,” she said softly.  His head twitched to the side at the unexpected comment, catching the sight of her forlorn expression as she gazed down at the cup just in front of her lips.

He didn’t say anything, instead continuing down the hall and disappearing from her immediate sight.  Once he was within the safety of his chambers, a hard glint flashed in his eyes.

The scent of blood and shit unique to one place within the walls lingered on her cloak.

Next Chapter---->

Levi Tags:  @clary-quinn​ @humanitys-hottestsoldier @whalerus​ @sunny-flo​

Wings in the Dark Tags:  @regalillegal​ @animeluver23​ @theshylittleelfgirl​ @queenthorin1​ @dilucs-thighs​ @sociallyanxiousmouse

[unproduciblesmackdown]

and besides a [you can fill in the blanks / just hc whatever in the face of little info] about winston or taylor individually as well as of course the dynamic and the never worth showing but presumably occurring occasional interaction b/w an employee & his boss, it’s I Guess Sort Of Fun [wringing what you can from what you get] style challenge opportunities re: how the little of their Dynamic that we see is so expressly Not Talking / the more successful and [specifically devoted to an interaction between them] matters are nonverbal

like it’s billions, taylor doesn’t always talk a lot whether they’re a) too busy preferring to listen and/or b) uninterested in the way that talking and the way that’s done / the language used is part of the “any & every interaction is a power struggle / challenge to someone’s power or defense of your own / vie for a higher spot on the social hierarchy” constant experience (which isn’t what winston does, and is certainly seen to be doing it Wrong if you push everything into the context of this Competition, which is always what’s happening) and half the time their using The Language the way others do is more strategic about just a shortcut (or requirement) for getting through to whoever can’t fathom working with someone who hasn’t made a godfather reference yet or whatever

meanwhile winston speaks with Personality & Flair but as stated not in the “right” way, and he communicates to like, have a constructive interaction with some non [i’m trying to defeat you in this battle arena] purpose, while everyone reacts to the Style rather than substance of what he says, and perceives it as hostile &/or cringe (autistic character moments) while taylor at the very least generally refrains from negative feedback, rather just actually listening to the info

however, all this is to say that with how [unusual billions] a matter of fact exchange is like the ones taylor & winston can have, naturally we have taylor just rarely interacting with him at all, not saying anything back to him even when he’s speaking to them, and winston in speaking to them of course only getting to Exposit for them, b/c it’s not like they’re gonna relate to him or get to have a conversation that involves their serious character material with him, b/c he is an unserious funny little guy who nobody could relate to b/c he’s Other People to us all. but at least winston doesn’t seem to bring this up / is glad Enough to just be able to talk to them while they virtually never reply

again however, even in that matter, taylor communicates with him Nonverbally, in that they’re willing to use eye contact to Acknowledge him / accompany the fact that they’re listening. not like it’s a huge deal when this is like, a whole thing of theirs re: any & everyone, but it’s like, well great that there’s not a Negative Exception made for winston b/c he’s not even worth that, or whatever lol. but they also do use Deliberate Expression Shifts to speak to him, even when sometimes that’s negative too, they also have more Matter Of Fact than not cues that he receives and takes as the communication that it is. oh, and the pat on the back even lol. the rarity of taylor using Touch with someone lmao, and yet here we are....

anyways, on this show so about how people use Language in these particular ways, and where both winston and taylor even for having “unusual” or even Wrong approaches in that world also have their own elevated quality to things / individual flair, it’s still fun to consider like, okay, how about a dynamic of really Talking At All even less than usual, what could that entail, what could it look like. winston phoning it in, 90% of his potential effort dedicated to other things, still being worth 5 employees w/more experience, sitting on a beanbag in the corner of taylor’s office, knitting them a sweater, sometimes chatting to them without expecting a response, they might be ignoring it wholly like he’s just providing bg noise while they focus on work, might be that two months later they might bring up something he offhandedly said in an actual exchange with him as one of those titrated metaphors like learning about wrestling b/c mafee likes it, figuratively bless them. maybe you have to prove yourself through Language and Charisma and that avenue isn’t even open to winston, but hey, he’s already Here after being proven enough quantingly in kompenso for taylor to decide he can be included around here as their funny little guy at all, and that’s Stayed enough, so everything else is just bonus / extra flair one way or another. he may never win points with anyone by being a person with a personality & presence, but as ever, of course he may as well be not very dissuaded ever from existing & speaking regardless of anyone’s negative reactions & punishments over that, b/c the extra punishment of trying to disengage from his personality, go as unnoticed as possible, and speak as briefly & lifelessly as possible would just be another punishment that itself would be cringe, wrong, & worthy of punishment, and not get him any points

anyways the point is. An Element of winston & taylor interactions which can be prompted by [writers decided that after kompenso taylor would just never talk to him again] like okay then, their Interactions and A Dynamic where winston might talk to them regardless of Knowing this pattern, taylor will know that a nonverbal wavelength works just as well here if not sometimes better, and tl;dr things aren’t necessarily hashed out via the particulars of a verbal exchange very much being read tf into as the vehicle for all the nuance in a dynamic / an individual’s feelings/intentions abt that dynamic, when it’s a realm where winston is only ever going to be judged to lose / to supposedly prove/justify his lack of value, and where even when taylor holds their own / indicates value / wins in this realm, it’s often enough got this premise of A Challenge to it, as it does in any given extended conversation actually included in the show....the fun of working around that. for me anyways, and in imagining them working around it

[heymeowmao]

2021.10.29 - https://weibo.com/l/wblive/p/show/1022:2321324697717908570439

I’m here, I’m here~!

- starts off singing his new OST “一生有多远” from the movie The Curious Tale of Mr. Guo

LYN: Some people came into the stream and are rude right from the start, telling me, “Take off your cap!” Please excuse me, everyone, I’m having a little... baldness. That is, only the sides have hair and the top is just bald. Ok? Leave me some face.

- he bought a whole outfit for a cosplay, but in the end only the tie fit him. he couldn’t return the items because it had already passed return date. (kaito kid/magic kaito) LYN: Let’s just say we’ve created our own character.

Comment: The background picture (in the comments) has changed. LYN: Oh, really? I can only say “Thank you” to weibo. They’re the real og fans. Thank you Weibo for changing my pic to a better looking one. Which is it? For the album? Thank you. And again, I want to remind you that normally when people stream, they don’t get that picture in the comments section. [Usually the streams with a bg pic are for weibo special events.]

--- Heroes

- started voice-overs for Heroes, already at the 20-something episode so there are still several more to go; but he’s the last one of the actors to do the voice-overs, so it’ll prob air soon- maybe March 2022. says the broadcast will be delayed because of him, because there’s still a lot of touching up to do, post-production. /starts discussing how things are filmed in 8k quality now, and normal households only have up to 4k, at best/

Comment: My home can view things in 5k. LYN: That’s amazing. Do you own a movie theater? /glances at the comments and flinches/ LYN: I’m talking to you about a serious professional topic, and you’re in the comments messing around. Be careful I don’t kick you out. Someone said they have 98k.

LYN: Oops. Why have I started talking back at people again? I shouldn’t. Because a lot of these friends are new, and if they see that I’m so aggressive to my fans they may feel uncomfortable. I used to be a lot worse. (sharper tongue) But my customer pool has grown. It used to be just people who were hardcore fans, so when I joked around with them they wouldn’t get angry with me. they knew my personality and knew I meant no ill-will. I was only trying to bring up the atmosphere. But now I have a wider audience and the problem with that is that each person has their own preference. /makes a metaphor about cooking/ So I’ve moved to a more middle ground, but if you see me talk back at people, please don’t find it strange.

LYN: But getting back on topic, I hope eventually we will have the capability to view things in 8k and then you can watch the drama all over again. See if you can spot any mites.

- worries about looking ugly as Bai Choufei bc at least in UN he had glasses to cover most of his face, and in CGX he had a little hat most of the time. In this role he has to work hard on his looks so that the hairstyle doesn’t overpower him. - begs his fans to, when the drama airs, take a picture of him with all the beauty settings on the camera set to high and THEN view the drama/send him pictures that way. XD

Comment: That’s uncalled for. LYN: ... Some of the camera angles REALLY need it though. Because Heroes was filmed in a more- not a “gu-ou” (guzhuang-ouxiang), it’s not an idol drama because- I’m in it. I don’t dare to be labeled an “idol.” But the filming style, set, clothing- they aren’t there for the ~aesthetic~, it’s a straight wuxia drama. Not purely AUTHENTIC but the most authentic of what I’ve filmed so far. The makeup, too, is very realistic. You won’t see thick powder, so things look more real and textured. Men are more like men. Women are... more like women? I don’t know what I was trying to say, but you get the drift.

LYN: What I consider to be a wuxia drama needs to have these things- in my opinion: sects, weapons, martial arts. [t/n: like those mysterious secret arts that each family has, those types of martial arts. the ones that have NAMES, you know?]

 - starts explaining with the hopes that people understand the difference between original novels and drama adaptations, and how certain changes have to be made in the transition between the two medias LYN: Bai Choufei doesn’t really have a weapon, his weapons are his hands. You know how he has small flying knives at his waist- someone said they’re clothes clips, they’re not. His fingers are skilled, and he can use them to take someone’s life. The weapons/fight coordinator explained to me, this character’s greatest weapon is his thumb. Before a big fight he will do this /thumbs up/. Isn’t this amazing, my friends? [t/n: this means I’m gonna get some hand action in Heroes? :D] Comment: Are you serious? LYN: I’m 80% serious, because I actually haven’t seen the original novel; but if it made it into the drama adaptation, you tell me. LYN: At first he fights with the thumb, but later, if he meets a highly skilled fighter, he’ll use his middle fingers. I can’t show you because that will create enough material to blacklist me for life. You can imagine. But he uses the middle finger- because it’s longer, you know? Imagine- he’s fighting with his thumbs, meets a more skilled fighter and switches a finger to fight with.  Comment: You’re making this up. LYN: Go look at the source material. I really don’t know, but that’s what I’ve heard. If you think what I’m saying is fake, go find a fan of the novel and discuss with them what’s up. I think it’s real, because that’s with the teacher in the crew told me. LYN: It might be interesting when reading, but in the drama I can’t just show my thumbs all the time, so they gave me weapons to work with. So I’m more of an assassin. Anyway, don’t be upset if things don’t turn out exactly as in the novel- it just can’t be helped.

LYN: Another thing I heard is that there’s a character called “Guan Qi” and he’s such a skilled fighter that all of us combined can’t defeat him. So what happened to this character, if no one can defeat him? He was abducted by aliens. Seriously. [t/n: Joking...???] LYN: This is what I’VE HEARD. I don’t know the actual details. I’m just saying this for entertainment. If you’re interested you can look at the source. In any case, please be understanding if the drama doesn’t exactly go as the novel says. The crew works really hard to adapt the novel and film a drama out of it.

[... gets off track a little but comes back around]

LYN: Some things can’t be adapted, and it’s all for a reason. Take my character for example. In the novel, he doesn’t like to wear clothes. No clothes, just going around *shirtless* not in the nude, ok? Imagine you’re watching the drama and the first shot you see of him he’s clothed and you just shake your head and sigh, disappointed. “Not sticking to the original source.” LYN: I want to respect the source material, but Bai Choufei doesn’t really respect me. People might see me and say, “LYN, have a little more respect.”

--- Zi Chuan

LYN: Di Lin? He doesn’t really have a lot of scenes, I don’t know what to say. It’s a great character. Honestly I- I don’t dare speak... I have my own understanding of the role. From a role  standpoint, I don’t think Di Lin is as good as Bai Choufei. Di Lin is a.. uh... that is...  I don’t know. From my standpoint, picking a role, I like the character. But which does LYN as an actor like more? I like them both but would say I like Bai Choufei more. I had more fun acting in that role. LYN: Di Lin is indifferent to everyone. He has a very outstanding line and it goes, “I can kill every person in this world.” He doesn’t have any reservations, and doesn’t care about anything. The only things he cares about are his two bros and his wife. He’s not afraid of anyone. LYN: If the reception for Zi Chuan goes well, we might get to film a second season. :)

Comment: Who plays the wife? LYN: It’s the same woman who played Aunt Wenjin, Chen Wenjin in UN (Tao Luoyi). In this drama she plays Di Lin’s wife. Comment: You call her “Aunt”? LYN: It’s because in UN she played Aunt Wenjun, you know. We’re not saying that because of her age! Don’t cause my trouble. All of us “younger” people called her “Aunt” since she counts as an immortal, after all. Comment: Does Shades count as a younger generation? LYN: No, her role was called Aunt Wenjin, so the crew just called her that. I guess Chen Wenjin and I (Shades) count as the same generation.

--- An Le Zhuan

LYN: Luo Mingxi? Are you going to start grilling me on the details of LMX now? What do you want me to say??? Comment: Is he a good person? LYN: A person... cannot completely be “good.” You, too. No one can be absolutely “good”; everyone has their own intentions. Of course, there are no completely “bad” people either.

Comment: When they’re first born, children are good people. LYN: ?? This is getting a little too deep. I just want to say one thing- when children are born. Think of yourself when you were little- if you liked something and wanted it but your family wouldn’t get it for you, what is your first reaction? Do you understand your family? No. You cry, fuss, because you still want it. But if your parents hit you, then you understand. Are children good or bad? There is no absolute.

---

- starts discussing the concept where if you see someone bettering themselves, it will make you want to better yourself, too. calls it “内卷” and gets corrected in the comments. LYN: See? All of you are my teachers! You learn things in my stream! Comments: /asking for money for teaching him/ LYN: How could you come and ask me for money? This society is broken because of people like you. We’re communicating here. This is a mutual exchange of information, right? I learned what “内卷” means, but I also taught you what “san ti’ is.

- starts getting “emotional” when people asked him about ZSX actually giving him 200RMB. Says he’ll give the money back to ZSX when his birthday rolls around. XD LYN: It was only natural that he sent me money that day, because he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. You all were watching and holding him accountable for sending me 200RMB. Ever since then our wechat has been devoid of any conversation. Think about how awkward this is. Comment: But you still accepted it. LYN: :x People, we are all working individuals. Say you’re working overtime, and your boss gives you an extra 200RMB for your work. Do you accept it or not? We just changed the setting a little. It’s not like you can refuse it. Comment: But you were still conflicted over it. LYN: I’m conflicted, but also you still have to accept the money. It’s like you’re going on a diet but at the end of the day you still ate three bowls of rice for dinner. Are you conflicted or not? You are, but you still ate the three bowls of rice.

- has started wanting to take voice acting jobs, to add to his repertoire (singing, acting, etc.); he can take the opportunity to practice his voice-acting and learn something, but also earn a little money XD - checks out some famous voice actors, and tries his hand at it - asks for ideas for a sect name and wuxia character name; sect name: Night Owl Sect - the character names got a little messy and hilarious; he likens it to people asking online forums what they should name their newborn baby- you should never do it bc you’re asking for trouble. lol

- bathroom break LYN: It’s alright. It turns out they’re actors and they were just practicing their lines. Comment: Which actor? LYN: What’s it to you?

LYN: Hey, what if I start adding bg music every time, after I say something? Comment: Did you wash your hands? LYN: Did you think I wouldn’t?? /cue bgm/ It’s addicting. Comment: The bgm’s too cheap. LYN: It’s on purpose. /cue bgm/ It’s on purpose. I know which songs are fitting. I believe I’m a bit more knowledgeable than you, at least on the musical perspective.

- advertises his new OST “一生有多远” from the movie The Curious Tale of Mr. Guo LYN: I sang this song about a year ago, and the movie is about to air. I’ve heard it’s a very touching/emotional movie, you can go watch it if you have the chance. I didn’t really use many techniques or pour my emotions into the song, I just used a very simple and pure method to sing with. The movie itself is very emotional- so there was no need for me to be as well. I was already afraid you’d be crying uncontrollably. So I used a very simple method, so that you can immerse yourself into the story.

LYN: Am I trending/on the hot search? Comment: I came because of it LYN: Oh, welcome. Let me find a happier song. - /lands on a song he voices over with a message like a train announcement/ LYN: Welcome to the Modern Brothers Station. Please take your baggage XD - /keeps going through the songs, makes up lyrics/ LYN: ♪ I don’t want to rent, I want to go home. Go home, see my mom. I don’t want to rent, I want to go home. Go home to spend time with my father and mother. I don’t want to rent, I want to check out. I’m leaving, here’s the room card. ♪ - /keeps going through songs, trying to find a “five star hotel” music - lands on a “beachy” one/ LYN: ???? Comment: What’s with the crow? LYN: That’s not a crow, it’s a seagull! - /finds a sax-y one, enjoys it - like a fine dining restaurant with a bar/

- gets back to his cosplay LYN: I have the hat, too. It doesn’t really fit, but I can put it on top. Comment: Don’t wear two hats, you won’t grow tall. LYN: Your parents told you not to wear two hats because you wouldn’t grow tall? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?? Now it’s too late. LYN: Let me go find the suit jacket. // The jacket’s too short and the hat doesn’t fit. I couldn’t even get into the pants. - puts on the gloves and spectacle for the “full” look Comment: Driver. LYN: Your family’s driver wears such a big hat?

LYN: I can’t return it, because the time period has passed. It’s fine, I’ll make the most out of it for a stream. It’s just for entertainment. So you can watch me like some monkey. At the zoo you have to pay an entrance fee to see monkeys, but in my stream you can watch one for free. You even praise me “hou hou ting.” [t/n: “hao hao ting” = sounds very good, he just changes the “hao” to a monkey’s “hou”]

- Jing Tian’s in the stream; LYN tries asking her if she has any upcoming dramas or if her friends do, so he can advertise it in his stream. Each time is a 200RMB commission. Like what he did to ZSX. XDD Comments say that he scared her off. :p

---- Reaction Videos :: Our Song S3E6

- Lv Fang & Zhai Xiaowen - Listen Carefully (Ni Gei Wo Ting Hao) LYN: Why is it lagging, don’t lag! Let’s change a song first.

- Bibi Zhou & Shan Yichun - Hello (Wei) LYN: You know why they do this before the song, this “feel”? A lot of singers do this as a means to get into the right mood and to also find the correct tone. LYN: You’ll find that a singer’s next moves will reveal something about them. For example, every singer has a habit of holding the mic- I use my right hand, Penny also uses her right. Who else? I don’t know. Of course, some singers use their left. There’s no way to tell for sure. This isn’t important. But as they are singing, if they hold the mic with two hands, it reveals the singer’s inner thought. That is- that the next line they sing is very important, and they need to focus so they put both hands on the mic. // Of course, only believe 20% of whatever I say in my streams. 80% is nonsense. But you can choose what to believe or not. LYN: Oh! You’ll see a lot of singers like to move their hands when they sing. I also do this. There are two reasons/uses for this: 1. It helps to follow the flow of the song, 2. It helps you relax. LYN: You’ll find that from the moment Bibi starts singing, she’s actually looking at the lyrics prompter. I don’t blame her, since this isn’t her song. I can’t even remember the lyrics to MY OWN songs. But she’s very relaxed! LYN: Yichun moves her fingers like this to help her find the beat, since she’s singing a few lyrics one after another. It’s not a bad thing. I’m just saying that I’ve seen she uses this method. LYN: I just want to say- this song is quite difficult to sing. But- the thing is- these two people are the exactly right people to sing this type of song. To me, this song is hard. But to them, this song is only too easy. You understand?

Comment: Baobei, what are you good at? (music genre) LYN: Don’t call me baobei. I’m about to write my own original song called “Don’t Call Me “Baby”.”

- Rates the song 110/100 points

- Lv Fang & Zhai Xiaowen - Listen Carefully (Ni Gei Wo Ting Hao) LYN: See? It’s not lagging anymore. LYN: When I heard the first notes of the song I found it very familiar! The piano melody. I think it was from some game’s introduction/transition music. LYN: This song is hard. I think it’s hard. LYN: Someone told me to stop commenting. Are you afraid I’ll get yelled at? Even though I’m praising them??? I think this part right here is difficult to sing, it’s difficult for me, but I think Xiaowen handled it very well. I do think he could have done the transition into the chorus a little better though. If Lv Fang-laoshi sang the previous line, Xiaowen would have had more time to prepare to get into the chorus part. It was just a little rushed. LYN: I think it was a nice cover, and it’s a song that you can listen to on repeat. It’s a very comfortable listen.

- Da Zhangwei & Wang Sulong - That Year (Na Yi Nian) LYN: Look at him- white piano, white clothing- just like a White Prince (白马王子) LYN: When I sing, I don’t usually have the mic so close to my face. I very rarely do it, because I don’t dare to. But it gives you a very close feeling- like he’s singing/speaking only to you.

Comment: I'm gonna switch to being Wang Sulong’s fan. LYN: Don’t be like this again! We already discussed this topic, change it up! Say you’re gonna switch to Da Zhangwei!

/gets to the interim/ LYN: Let me tell you, this part is missing an instrument. /gets the kazoo/ Let me try it. - rates the song 99/100 points, but if LYN’s kazoo was added it would be 199/100 points

- Da Zhangwei & Wang Sulong - When I Lightly Cover Your Eyes (Dang Wo Qiao Qiao Meng Zhu Ni De Yan Jing) LYN: I think this one is missing a kazoo too. Let me see if there will be a part I can jump in. Let me tell you friends, sooner or later I’ll get to debut the kazoo on an Our Song stage. I’ll make it happen. I just have to find the right opportunity.

- Penny Tai & Liu Yuning - I Came to Beat You Up (Wo Shi Lai Zou Ni De) LYN: Idk why, but I really don’t like seeing this LYN. I’ll try to be nicer to him this time. How disrespectful “I Came to Beat You Up,” how can you sing a song named as such? LYN: Oh hey, it seems like I can add KaKa (kazoo) into the intro of this song. LYN: It’s nice. I used to really dislike this LYN, but after watching this performance, you can say... I’m an anti turned passerby. 

LYN: I had this outfit made for a different stage performance. I was supposed to sing a wuxia-type song- as for which song you can go guess yourself. I thought I would wear it and look cool, but because of the pandemic situation, the stage got cancelled. I took Our Song as a chance to find a use for the outfit. Most people find outfits for a song. I flipped it to find a song for my outfit.

---- Q&As

Comment: Don’t bring the kazoo to the Our Song stage. LYN: I’m gonna. The sound of this kazoo... can replace that of the suona. Let me find a song to demonstrate. LYN: It’s just a matter of time before I debut the kazoo on a stage. Just like how I’m looking for a chance to debut Dai Mi. You know how there are characters that always pet cats? I’ll be one of those with my dog.

Comment: Why won't you show us Dai Mi? LYN: I really like small dogs, but most of the time I don’t really hold or pet her. It’s probably just how I was raised, but I don’t think a grown man should spend most of his day playing with his pet dog/cat. But I do really love her. Another thing is, she counts as my family. I’m the “tool” and you can see me as you please, but I want her to have more privacy.  Comment: Are you afraid she’ll be more popular than you? LYN: You’re saying I bring out my dog, and she becomes more famous than me? I’ll just.. expire? The fact that you have this thought means that you’re not normal. Have I reached the point where I have to compete with my dog now?

Comment: Are you confirmed for an 11/11 event? LYN: An invitation did come, but I can’t go- none of the ALZ cast can go because that’s the day of our wrap. Comment: What happens after ALZ wrap? LYN: Our Song hasn’t finished yet. I’ll be doing that, and POSSIBLY one other variety show. I have a few OSTs to record, including a couple for Heroes. I'll also be working on album stuff.

- RE: Concert; he’s really happy that people are interested in wanting to go to his concert. As a singer, that’s a big goal for him. But, he’ll let us know when it’s gonna happen.

Comment: When does your next drama start? LYN: I’ll have to ask the crew. I think- from what I’ve heard- in December, but I’m not clear on the details.

Comment: When are you cutting your hair? LYN: I’ll cut it when I get back to Beijing. It has been getting a little long, I do need to take care of it.

Comment: When’s the Disney stream? LYN: Not sure. We’ll be filming for the drama wrap soon, so time is tight. All of MY important scenes are already done; since I don’t have many scenes to begin with. But my character still needs to be around.

Comment: Does spitting blood count as an important scene? LYN: Yes? What, do you only think losing an arm counts? Of course spitting blood counts as well. /pretends he’s dying/ “L...li..live... on... for.... m...me....”  Comment: Wow, his breath is so long. LYN: Have you died before? I’ve played a dying person three times already, and there’s a process, alright? If there’s just a gunshot to the head or a decapitation then I have nothing else to say, but normally we can drag on a death for at least 15 minutes. / starts explaining the scenario / 

Comment: How many takes does it take to complete a scene? LYN: You’ve asked a professional question. The problem is... I don’t have enough courage to say. It might implicate other actors and I’ll get yelled at. JK. I’m just like you- I started off in the customer service industry, and I’m taking you along with me as I become an actor. For me- personally- I don’t need more than three takes. I can’t do a one-take. I CAN but that doesn’t necessarily mean I acted well in it. The thing is, and even the directors know, no matter how hard you try sometimes there’s no more improvement an actor can show. (They’ve reached the limit of their abilities and even an infinite amount of takes won’t change a thing.) It’s enough to pass and that’s the end of the take.  LYN: Some very talented actors CAN do a one-take perfectly. But directors know when they can push it and when they can’t. Each take will always be different, and it’s all up to the director.

/it’s all a matter of opinion/

Comment: What does it sound like in the in-ear? LYN: It sounds like this /clicking/. This is a “click.” Singers can choose to have it or not. Saying simply, it’s a metronome and it helps you with the beat. You can choose which part of the arrangement you’d like to hear. (drums, bass, guitar, piano, etc.) Comment: Which do you choose? LYN: I want them all. I’m not like professional singers who have specifics. My own request is that the arrangement is louder than my own voice. I hate hearing myself sing. XD Basically, I’ll use anything you give me. Just think about when I used to sing in the alley! That mic was a few hundred and the mics I use now are- much more expensive. >.> - /explaining the difference between headphones and in-ears/

Comment: Does wearing the in-ear for very long hurt? LYN: Not really, because they’re custom made to fit your ear. /explaining how it’s made/

- someone asks if in-ears are expensive; LYN does not like pricing things, because that opens the conversation to what he considers “expensive” and from there people can infer how much money he has. LYN would rather quantify something by its worth/value (in use). LYN: You consider things expensive if you can’t come to terms with the value (in your mind) of an object vs the cost (material) of an object. If you can’t come to terms with it, it’s expensive. If you can, it’s not expensive.

Comment: Can you hear the director (through the in-ear)? LYN: That depends on if they want you to hear them or not. There’s a sound technician, and they’ll send you whatever you want to hear.

Comment: Will the in-ear leak electricity? LYN: ??? Only if there’s water in your head? They plug in to the mic pack, so there’s little to no electricity flowing through them. You probably wont get electrocuted. I don’t know. I’ve never experienced it.

Comment: Is it the “bee”? LYN: The “bee” is something different. [t/n: the wind muff on a lapel mic] One is a mic (receiver), the other is a speaker. They’re two different things.

Comment: Why do some people take out the in-ear as they sing? LYN: To look cool. JK. There’s are reasons. For example, on stage there are a lot of signals, and sometimes they get crossed or the signal gets lost. If the in-ear loses signal, you can’t hear anything, no matter how loud the stage/audience is. You can only hear the white noise. Why do they only take out one side? So they can use their natural hearing to listen to what’s being played on stage. They only take out one side because they’re waiting for the sound technicians to save them and get the signal back online. Usually it doesn’t happen.

- Happy New Year! (it’s past 12a) LYN: I didn’t really want to spend the new year, but I got caught up in all the professional questions and I couldn’t stop myself. LYN: I’ll stay for a little bit longer because I think I actually did make it into the hot search. It would be rude of me to leave and end the stream right when people are coming in. It’s like if a guest just came to your house but you say “Oh, I’m sorry. I’ve got to step out.”

LYN: We were talking about the in-ears earlier. If the signal is lost, most people wait for a miracle. If the miracle doesn’t come, you can only give up and take out the other side too. Because only one side is not enough to listen to the music. Then later you can take it up with the sound technicians. [..] I’m not saying you get off stage and yell at them! Don’t misunderstand me. LYN: Usually it’s a live-stream situation and what’s happened has happened and has already been broadcast. There’s no need to retaliate and yell at the technicians. They’ll feel bad and you yourself wont get any satisfaction. It wasn’t their fault that the equipment experienced a problem. There’s no need to retaliate. I just go to them and let them know what happened so they can avoid problems in the future.

LYN: You know what, though? For a singer, if your in-ear really does stop working, it’s an opportunity for you. If it happens to you and you take out the in-ear and go on singing and it’s no different from if you DID have an in-ear. 1. You’ll probably end up on the hot search. 2. It will make your fans have that much more confidence in you. 3. Your fans can take this as a chance to spread the word about you. 

Comment: What happens if you sing it badly. LYN: If there’s no signal, and you take out the in-ear and end up off key. You can’t find the beat. Then you’ll... let’s just say you’ll still end up in the hot search. Of the two “OOO lost signal, Sings off-key” and “OOO lost signal, Sings Normally” I think the former is more likely to become a big topic. Don’t you think so? [Would you rather watch a train-wreck or not? We all know. :)]

Comment: Ning-ge, you’re not tired? Have you got any work tomorrow? LYN: I’m filming tomorrow, and then after that I’ll be doing the voice-acting. I was thinking to stream tomorrow (Saturday) but I looked at my watch and thought that “It’s Friday, you probably get a break tomorrow.” So people can relax and watch my stream and not have to worry about work or school in the morning.

Comment: How do you stay up so late but still function normally the next day? LYN: I got used to it. Staying up all night IS bad for your health, I know. But I just can’t help it. I just got used to it. Of course, every person has their own limits and as long as you stay within those limits I think there’s no problem.

LYN: I’m the Night Owl Sect leader, Liu Xia Lai*. Welcome. [* t/n: he’s using this as a name, but “liu xia lai” (留下来) means “to stay”]

LYN: I’m seeing a lot of comments that are saying that you can’t hold up any longer, that you’re sleepy and about to drop your phone on your face. Are you young?? Come on. I’m so old and I can stay up and talk to you for five hours. I’m not tired, but you are?? Around this time is right when young people are the most active.

LYN: Let me play you a song that’ll make you perk right up.

Comment: I’m on the night shift, can you tell a story? My daughter really likes it. LYN: ? You’re working on the night shift and you left a phone at home so I can lull your kid to sleep? Is that the situation?

Comment: Tell a ghost story. LYN: Don’t scare me. My stream is not like it was before. Do you think an artist alone in their stream can rely on ghost stories? Do you think it’s dependable? I can see the headlines now “Singer LYN tells ghost stories in his stream.” Comment: You can get into the hot search. LYN: Just because I can doesn’t mean I should. LYN: Don’t joke around, I’ll kick you out. I’m serious. XD 

LYN: It’s about time friends. I still have to eat a little something and go to class and go over my lines for tomorrow. Thank you for coming; even Jing Tian-laoshi came to see me, so I’m happy. There are a lot of new friends, subscribe to my weibo, and it’ll tell you when I stream next. You may not want to see it, but at some point you might even like watching. Thanks for coming and I hope my boring stream could accompany you for a short five hours. I hope to have brought you even a little bit of happiness. See you next time!

[hansolmates]

jjk; angel’s trumpet [02]

summary; one second, your life is flashing before your eyes and the next, you’re transported into a world exactly like your own. but the jungkook you meet in this world isn’t a renowned singer or your former almost-lover, in fact he has no clue who you are and why you know him so well. as you work to find your way home lost and confused, you conclude that you’re either dead or in the middle of the most wicked drug trip of your life. pairing; idol!jk x reader (f), alternatively film producer!jk x reader genre/warnings; fluff, angst, supernatural, idol!au, non-idol!au, alternate universes, themes of fate, language, alcohol consumption, mentions of smut in future chapters w.c; 3.5k a/n; i know it feels like a lot of bg and internal conflict but y/n!! our girl is struggling! she’s processing and is going through some times BUT things will spice up soon so thank you for all the love +notes, see you again thursday! 

[01] [02] [03]-> masterpost

The two most frequent contacts in your phone (you hope it’s your phone? It’s the same edition and everything) are Jimin and Taehyung. 

Jungkook (or not-Jungkook) high-tailed it out of there as soon as he deemed your reactions unfit for basic human society. He muttered that you were crazy and probably under something, and sped off in his motorcycle just like that. Like you were a stranger. 

It's not easy to ignore the aftermath of your heart after taking yet another rejection, but you're independent and you must stride forward in this strange situation. Taking a cautionary look around the area, you clutch your phone like a lifeline, tethering you together in this unfamiliar place. There's not many people around, but you spot a large library and a playground. Professionals are mulling from building to building, zombies in wrinkled suits and dripping iced coffees. Your phone displays an innocent 7:51, revealing how early it is. Toggling between the two friends in your contacts you take your chances and start with Jimin. The phone rings once, twice, before his dulcet voice chimes in your ear. 

“Babe?” he croons, and your heart drops at the sickly warm tone, “you can’t get enough of me after what we did last night?” 

You’re going to throw up. Scratch that, acid is already bubbling through your throat and you force yourself to tamp it down. There is no, no way in hell could you have hooked up with Park Jimin in your lifetime. 

Unless this is hell. 

“Jimin,” you steel your voice, hoping he can’t hear how absolutely mortified you are. You can picture this version of Park Jimin now, laying around in bed with crossed legs and casually enjoying how much you’re squirming on the other line, “I just need you to tell me where I live so we can move on with our lives.” 

He laughs, giggles bubbling like soft pink champagne. “Wow, I really must’ve fucked your brains out if you can’t even remember where you live.” God, in what life would Park Jimin be “fucking your brains out”? Maybe you should find a trashcan just in case you do puke on the sidewalk. “Y’know, you signed your lease with Taehyung a month ago? You just moved in last week?”

“T-Taehyung?” you stutter, trying to imagine the notion, “I live with Taehyung?” 

A beat passes, and you realize that just like you scared not-Jungkook away, you could be doing the same to Jimin. 

He says your name softly, gone the cocky tone you were initially bombarded with. “Are you okay? You could’ve waited for me to wake up, y’know. We had a lot to drink last night.” he mumbles, almost cutely if it weren’t for the fact the he was insinuating sex two seconds ago, “Did you eat?” 

“‘M fine,” you mumble, trying to chalk up your previous question with inhiberation. “Just loopy, I guess. I almost got hit by a motorbike, so my brain is probably just catching up.” 

“You got hit? Did you call a hospital?” great, now Jimin’s panicked. “Where are you? I’m gonna go get you. Drop your location, I’m leaving now!” 

“I’m fine!” you snip, and you feel bad for nearly screaming on the line. “I’m almost home, I’m just gonna lay in bed and sleep it off. I’ll call you later, okay?” 

You don’t bother hearing his response, and you hang up. You then start to furiously scroll Taehyung’s chat wall, noting that he’s on an academic trip with his students until next week and you have the apartment to yourself. After a good ten minutes of scrolling and reading conversations that you can’t recollect you finally catch the address to your shared apartment. 

The city is the same, fortunately. So are the bus stops, and you’re thankful that your bus pass has some fare money. Turns out you’re starting your journey at the University of Seoul. The bus routes are the same as well, and you manage to take a tour of your side of the city, noting the tiny differences in the town. 

For example, there’s no BigHit Entertainment in its usual spot. Instead it’s an additional practice  space for Cube Entertainment. 

There’s no fanfare to your city tour, and it almost feels like you’re just a normal woman taking a ride home. There’s still the same trees and squirrels, familiar odeng stands and ice cream shops. It feels like you’ve been cut and pasted into this world with no rhyme or reason, a fever dream. 

The bus circles around the usual route once more until you’re in front of your supposed home, only a twenty minute bus ride from where Jungkook almost ran you over. 

It’s a lot, and you realize on the drive over that you’re probably in deeper shit than you could ever imagine. You pull out your keys, and instead of seeing the ramen keychain Jungkook got you when he went to Tokyo Disney, instead it’s replaced by a university ID labeled Assistant Professor under your full name. 

You pin that new fact for later and focus on getting inside.

Your apartment is nice, you muse. Simple black and white furniture, but there’s a definitive home-ness to it. There’s a moss green afghan folded up on the couch, presumably made by the artist himself. You’re glad Taehyung’s appeal for the arts hasn’t been lost, as revealed by the frames on the walls detailing pictures of you and Taehyung’s families, and some of Jimin and Taehyung. 

Deeper into the apartment you find your room. You choke back a sob at the familiar bedsheets your parents bought you at Target, and you even notice some familiar clothing pieces folded haphazardly in the corner. Instead of your bed being filled with shameless BT21 PR however, your RJ and Mang are replaced with simple panda and cat plushies. 

Finally letting your tears fall, you sob loudly into your pillows, hugging and grappling at anything to comfort you. You feel achy and tired, as if your heart has fallen out of your body and nothing can fill the void. As much as your bed sheets feel the same, as genuine as those pictures are in your shared living room, this isn’t your home. 

•━━━━━━»••»💮💮💮«••«━━•

Between your bouts of crying and forcing yourself to stomach cheap ramen, you find out a couple of things. 

You’re an assistant professor at Seoul University. At least this version of you is. A little part of you is pleased by this, you have always wanted to teach at the university level before settling with BigHit. To your chagrin however, you’re not a language professor. 

To your horror, you’re a pre-medical student teaching two “History of Neuroscience” classes. It’s only two classes because according to your Google calendar, you’re also balancing the completion of  your final thesis on muscular dystropathy among low-income neighborhoods. 

Dear god, if your parents ever found out you could’ve been a doctor in another life, they’d be surely choking on their own spit. In this world, you probably weren’t lazy and wholly capable of achieving the impossible. 

You don’t know why you spend the next two hours sending emails to your students about cancelling the next week of classes. Fortunately all your lessons are neatly packaged in your drive, and you send out an email with said lessons citing your mental health and how you’ll resume direct instruction the following week. 

From time to time, your eyes can’t help but travel to the frames and polaroids that decorate your walls. Some of the memories are vaguely similar, a house in the suburbs, an annoying cousin who can’t stop and won’t stop pulling at your pigtails, a movie night with unlimited pizza and breadsticks. 

Some of them are far and beyond your state of recognition. Jimin and you playing hopscotch by the river, Taehyung stuffing his face with fried potato skins in a cheap hole-in-the-wall, you winning the blue ribbon at your high school’s science fair. 

You could very well walk out of this life and just focus on going back home, but something tells you that you need to continue on with this life, at least for now. 

It feels too real to be a dream. When you tug at your hair tie, it’s painful when it snaps across your wrist. Your skin blooms with color upon impact. Could you die in this world? If Jungkook had not skidded in time, would you have survived a motorcycle accident? 

Three days pass like that. You’re contemplating, absorbing information. In-between pints of ice cream and crying your ducts out, you’re drawing conclusions. Could you be in a coma? A very realistic, painful coma? But Jimin and Taehyung are still sending you texts and the day turns to night as painfully slow as it always has. A coma can’t fake a forty person class, all of them vying for your attention through various emails and Zoom calls. It can’t be it. 

And as you rummage through your drawers, check every bit of social media and even your yearbook photos, you also confirm that Jeon Jungkook has no place in this version of your life. It saddens you greatly, and reminds you eerily about the heated conversation you had before all of this. The Jungkook from days ago, the one who looked terrified when you tried to touch him, only met you through happenstance. 

By day four, you get a phone call. There’s no picture next to the contact, only named Biggie Mentor. After a few rings, you finally get the courage to answer the call. 

A deep timbre seeps its way through the line, and you almost whine at how much you missed him. “y/n,” Namjoon says, but he doesn’t sound happy, “tell me why our students said you cancelled all of your classes this week due to mental health?” 

If Namjoon’s your mentor, that means you’re probably in deep shit for cancelling all your classes without his consent. 

“Uh, exactly that,” you say, and it hurts how much you have to strain your voice, trying not to pour any type of affection into this version of Namjoon. You’ve always had a soft spot for his gummy smile. “I’m sorry for not telling you beforehand. Something really traumatic just happened and,” you choke back a sob, trying to cover the microphone, “and I really needed some space.” 

“Hey, it’s okay,” his voice is like melted honey, and you close your eyes and picture yourself back at BigHit, Namjoon’s happy smile whenever he tries to cheer you up. It only makes you even more upset, and your mind is all shadowed and filled with fuzzies as you attempt to picture Namjoon as your boss, “I was just shocked, that’s all. Is everything alright?” 

“No,” you reply truthfully, “and I don’t know if it will be.” 

There’s a terse silence, both your breaths hanging on the line with no move to continue the conversation. If your personality here is similar to your true world, you would understand why Namjoon would have a hard time formulating a reply. You don’t even know how close you are with him here. What remains is that you’re the type to keep your secrets to yourself, and if they truly felt hindering, you’d tell somebody. Not to say you’re the suffer in silence type of person, but you weren’t one to immediately dump your feelings on someone. 

Finally, Namjoon musters a reply, “I have a break at two. Why don’t you swing by our usual lunch spot and we can talk? Their sandwiches always cheer you up. ”

“Joonie,” your voice cracks, and you shake your head despite the fact that he can’t see you. A slip of the nickname comes out before you can help it, and you hope this Namjoon is fond of the manner. “I don’t know where that is. Or what our ‘usual’ spot is. I don’t know what sandwiches you’re talking about either.” 

“Okay,” and you relax at the calmness in his tone, “I’ll swing by after my 5PM then. Set the table for us, yeah?” 

•━━━━━━»•»💮💮💮«•«━━•••

Namjoon smells of dry-erase marker and antiseptic. 

He’s bounding into your apartment like it’s his own home, carrying two paper bags and a stack of leather bound books. The items fly across your coffee table, and you two work together to organize both your dinner and the books. Namjoon looks like a textbook nerd, wearing shades of burgundy and burnt orange as he breaks into your front door. Gone are the boots and sleek outfits that trim his figure, and you can’t help but go a little anti-starstruck at how normal this moment is.

But what remains is the bumbly stance as he makes his way through your tiny space, long limbs and all flailing to help you place his work in a safe space. The curve of his nose and dimples so deep you could fill a lake in them, you can’t help but muster a shy smile as he takes notice that you’re staring at him a little too much for comfort.

The two of you eat in relative silence, and you gratefully accept the bag he pushes in your direction. To your surprise the sandwich inside is a favorite combination of yours, and you wonder if this restaurant exists in your world. 

Your world. 

“Namjoon,” you place your sandwich down, despite the fact that your stomach is protesting for you to finish the first real meal you’ve had in days, “you know that movie, Avengers?” 

Namjoon’s face is puffed with bread, and you hand him a water bottle to chug it down. “Dunno,” he shrugs, “Marvel isn’t a popular franchise, so even if I had I wouldn’t remember.” 

“Marvel isn’t popular—” what kind of fucked up world is this? Your Jungkook would have a field day if he was in your shoes. “Anyway. There’s a concept from Marvel that there’s multiple Earths. Like you can create a rip in space and land yourself in another dimension if you’re not too careful. Do you think it’s possible?” 

Your tall mentor pushes his charcoal hair back, exasperated. “Is this why you’re taking off? Because you believe in some silly comic book series?” 

You feel your heart cracking, desperately trying to keep itself together. In your haste you grip Namjoon’s arm, desperate. “Please, just hear me out.” you warble, “a few days ago I was out drinking with a friend. Next thing I know, I’m in another world where I run into a boy. That boy is my friend, but he says he doesn’t recognize me! But I don’t recognize this life. Namjoon I can’t even imagine you wanting to be a doctor!” 

Namjoon is looking at you funny, and you know he’s really trying to believe you. Instead of the reassuring words you hope for, he instead says, “this isn’t even pseudoscience, y/n. This is supernatural! How could you possibly think you’re from another dimension? I just saw you last week and everything was fine!” 

“I saw you last week too!” you exclaim, clutching your chest, “and you cried again for the umpteenth time because you lost another pair of custom Airpods.” 

A pause. “That does sound like me.” 

Hope blooms in your stomach. “Doesn’t it?”

“Well, in this supposed other life. What is my profession?”

Your face falls. “Uh, you’re in a worldwide K-pop band. You’re making millions and producing beautiful music.” 

That sounded way better in your head. Out loud it sounded absolutely bonkers. You don’t even blame Namjoon when he bursts out laughing, wiping tears from his eyes. You let him, sinking further into your seat and hugging your knees. You really hoped Namjoon would’ve come through for you. 

However you’re not laughing along with him, and he immediately stops at your teary expression. He pushes himself over to you with his long legs, quickly moving to prevent yourself from tucking into your shell. He sees how small your form becomes and he reaches over to place a hand over your hair. “You’re really upset over this, aren’t you?” he questions aloud, and he can’t piece it together, “did you hit your head or something?” 

Defeated, you explain, “I may have gotten hit by a motorcycle the other day.” 

“What?” he squeezes your shoulder, “well, that explains a lot! What if you’re hallucinating? What if you have a concussion? You could be suffering from short-term memory loss!” 

You’re sure it’s none of those things, but you let him ramble. The explanation is clear-cut and so painfully normal that it’s the only conclusion that Namjoon will cling to. Your mentor insists you take a medical leave, and says he’ll take over your classes in the meantime. He gives you a number to call, explains there one of the best doctors for trauma and motor incidents. You don’t say anything to that, but you accept the number and lie when you say you’ll call them in the morning. Namjoon still treats you like a friend however, despite your fruitless confession, and you concede that his comfort is more than enough after such a rough week. 

•━━━━━━»••»💮💮💮«••«━━••

It’s been nearly two weeks since you’ve contacted Jimin. 

Sure, Jimin’s contacted you. A couple flirty texts here, some low-key sexy selfies there. Usually, you’d eat that up like honey and butter. Now, there’s only one-word replies and half-hearted attempts at continuing a conversation. He loosens his tie, thankful he’s working out of the office today. He can look at his phone all he wants, and no one will judge him. 

Jimin finally looks up at the photographer his marketing company contracted, who’s still mulling over the contract. “We’re not trying to jip you, promise.” Jimin assures, and he almost laughs at the comical way the young man’s large eyes catch his concern. “You’ll get all that money, and then some if you need to work overtime. It’s a sweet gig.” 

“Yeah,” the young man nods, and grabs the pen to sign at the bottom. “Looking forward to working with you.” 

“Same to you, Mr. Jeon,” Jimin grins, meeting him halfway across the table, “I’ve seen your work, I’m sure the commercial will be beautiful.” 

“You can call me Jungkook,” the new employee flashes him a quick grin, taking his palm in his. Jimin tries not to twitch at this cute kid, who is both devastatingly handsome and cute at the same time. He’s a little jealous, a little attracted. 

“Great, because Mr. Park is my dad. Jimin’s fine.” 

It’s then that Jimin’s phone lights up, both pairs of eyes darting to the picture of you decorating the wallpaper. 

While it’s not a completely flattering picture (you’re asleep with your wire-rimmed glasses half-off and there’s drool dribbling down your chin.) However it’s definitely you, the person Jungkook nearly killed a couple days ago.

Jungkook’s mouth goes dry, and he lets go of Jimin’s hand like it’s fire. Jimin hardly notices, grabbing his phone in hope that you replied to his text. To his despair, it’s just Taehyung. He ruffles his hair in frustration, letting the slick ebony strands fall out of his hairstyle.

“Fuck,” Jimin curses, shoving his phone in his blazer. 

“Everything alright?” Jungkook asks, trying to be polite. On the other hand, he’s rather curious about the girl from weeks ago, who still hasn’t left his mind. 

In the heat of the moment, Jungkook left the scene with you blubbering on the road. How wide your eyes were with recognition, and almost mother-like as you coddled him like someone to protect. He’s felt bad about it since, but he had an interview with Jimin’s boss and he couldn’t blow a job opportunity. It couldn’t be helped that your sad expression has been his midnight fixation when he can’t sleep or has a creative block. He should’ve at least called a cab to take you to the hospital or something, you were clearly not in the right mind. 

“Yeah, it’s just a friend.” Jimin forces a smile, not wanting to dump his baggage on the new employee. “She almost got hit by a motorcycle the other day,” Jungkook masks a wince, remembering the horror he felt when he saw you, just lying there across the street. “Ever since then, she just hasn’t been herself. I’m just worried. It’s like she’s seen a ghost or something.” 

“Oh,” Jungkook steals a glance at Jimin’s phone again, hoping to see your picture light up again. He does feel a little guilty pushing you off him and running away, but then again it was you that started being weird. 

How did you know him, and why were you so concerned for his well-being? Would he get fired if he asked Jimin about you? That would be the quickest job he ever got contracted for. Instead, Jungkook forces a smile and offers a neutral, “Well, I’m sure things will work out.” 

“Thanks, I hope so too.” 

Jungkook’s palms are sweaty, as if it’s a dark premonition that something will happen. With Jimin around supervising him, he has a feeling that if things don’t work out, things will happen regardless. 

Maybe he’ll understand why you were so concerned for a stranger’s well-being, and why you looked at him like that. 

Like someone in love. 

[thedevilliers]

Hey, I've been reading your story for a while, and I'm enjoying it very much. Following the De Villiers has been so fun, and you've inspired me to create my own royal Simblr!

Can you maybe share some tips about what to do with your royals? I'll be posting my family within the next few weeks, and I have already planned out several engagements + events, including visits to parks/schools/hospitals, parties, and news surrounding a royal pregnancy. I've also planned out the first arc. I don't know what else to do, and I've barely started! If you have any tips related to the beginning of your Simblr that you didn't cover in your other post, I would so appreciate them. I want to get all this nailed down *before* posting, so my blog is the best that it can be.

Also, if you have any advice on how to make things as efficient as possible (especially regarding posing sims, editing/writing posts, etc.), I would love that! I want to cut down on time wasted wherever I can.

Thank you!! :-)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 me?!!?!?! ME ??????? omg 🧍‍♀️ thank u for reading my story 🥺 and AAAAAAAAAAAA your own royal simblr !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ill answer everythin under the cut !!!!! spoilers: it got long sorry

first of all, remember we ALL started somewhere. you can look at my first like... fifteen and even MORE posts and they are BAD. oh my gawd idk why i thought they were good, but hey! i learned things from them. you will more than likely change your mind about certain things from the beginning of your blog to who knows, four months from now. don’t focus and worry a lot on ‘perfection’ and setting up ‘high standards’ from the beginning. treat it like a learning curve! this is something we all do for fun, so don’t get stressed a lot on it. you can always change and adapt things and that’s no problem!

i love lists, so im gonna list a few things of advice/tips basing myself on what you said!!!

i personally don't do engagements anymore, so i can't really help you in this regard of even more activities you could do 🧍‍♀️ what i could recommend for people to get to know your characters' personalities and private lives and grow attached to them, add in BTS posts.

continuing on my BTS’ post thing, they are a GREAT way to show more than what the public sees for your royals. because from a press and public point of view, you don't really know 'what goes on behind closed doors'. they could be all happy in public, but in privatE??!??!!?!?

as i said in my starting out guide, i did have around ~15 drafts done before i started posting. just so i could not stress about “oh my god i dont have any posts for tomorrow”. a LOT of ppl do posts and queue them as they go, and they have MANY posts done and usually they start accumulating and they are MONTHS in advance compared to what they’re currently posting. if this method works for you, you can definitely use it!

please, please please read your dialogue OUT loud. is it possible to say a 2093023902 word sentence without a singular use of punctuation? do people in this age and era really talk this way? also please if possible use correct grammar. just a little pet peeve, it can take a reader out of the immersion your story gives them.

we all have our lil dialogue habits. mine is starting sentences with “oh” and the infamous dash “—”. others use ellipses. just make sure you aren’t overdoing it. for example, doing a sentence like “oh— there you are. i was uhm— looking for you. how—how are you? its—i mean where have you uhm— been? yes—ive—ive been fine. you? i mean— your mom” ....just no 😔 it doesnt read well at ALL

you can always do lil filler posts, dont tell anyone tell you otherwise. post a little simstagram post, a little family portrait, updated portraits post, family hanging out, kids hanging out, etc.

for posing sims, i do try and remember where MOST of my poses are in the ingame list. usually creators’ correctly naming the poses helps a lot. for example i need a Mel Bennet pose; hers are usually ALL in the same spot and have the same lil aqua bg so i can easily find them. sometimes, i dl pose packs VERY specifically for a certain scene. am i gonna use them again? no. so i open the .package file in sims4studio and rename them to “00 for emi scene [rest of the og name” so when i open my game, they are around the top of the list! no more scrolling and i easily know what i need it for.

dont be scared to plan things that are happening MONTHS from now or anything in detail. some ppl dont like planning things in detail, or even dont like planning things AT ALL or things that arent happening say, in over 2 weeks because idk, they get bored. i recommend at LEAST having a list of things that HAVE to happen so you have ‘goals’ and you slowly plan out how you’re gonna get there. at LEAST theres some level of planning there. if you’re posting and PLANNING as you go, there’s gonna be holes. and it’s gonna be obvious.

editing wise, i don’t do much. my reshade does most of the work, i just add in my psd, add text and done! this is easily the fastest thing you will ever do.

if you get inspired by someone else doing, idk, a certain layout for the portraits, them adding little things to their captions, a certain edit, etc. if you want to do something similar and you ARE very much aware you were inspired by them, credit them in the caption. i beg. its free, its the nice thing to do, bc if not its rude.

if you get inspired by a certain storyline someone else did and you notice yours is gonna be similar, go ahead and send them a message to let them know and if they have any tips or feel uncomfortable with you doing this. simply put, if you don’t, you’re gonna look bad. we are all bound to do same storylines, such as assassinations, shooty shooty’s, stalkers, first loves, accidental babies, etc. but what changes is how each person approaches it. no ones gonna do it the same way as you and others. if you CONSCIOUSLY start copying else, stop it. and you could even be unconsciously be inspired by someone else too. it happens! just make sure you are able to look at the bigger picture and realize “hey, i’m doing something wrong”

same thing with dialogue. you like a line someone else said in their story? don’t just... steal it and incorporate it into yours word BY WORD

OVERALL: you can be inspired. give credit where it’s due. and don’t copy because someone else is doing ‘something others like’ and you want others to like your story. no no no !

im adding this AFTER i posted it but, be yourself. in the way you interact with others and send questions, etc. don’t try and copy someone else’s personality because they are liked and essentially absorb them. be yourself and i’m sure a lot of ppl will like you the way you are : D

for my writing dialogue etc, this goes back to my point 8. i use milanote, its free and you get 200 free thingies to use, and i plan out how every single one of my posts is gonna go. so i just have to go ingame and i already know what im gonna do. no thoughts, just taking screenshots. for example, this is how a part of my part 2, chapter 3 posts layout looks like. every square is a post that has what is happening, who is in it, what is gonna be said very vaguely, etc:

11. and the most important tip! don’t compare yourself to others. i did it at the beginning. i think we all did at one point. its not good for you at all. please always remember we all are here for share our lil stories with each other and it’s not easy get a following. you’ll get there and its gonna take time. be patient, be nice!!! and i cant wait to see your story!!!!!!!!!!

[the-firebird69]

According to a hospital and the hospital is in the DC area Biden has a little bit of the covid-19 problem and it's really a b******* disease there's no such thing the pseudo empire I don't really like the pseudo empire they did a lot of dirty work for the empire and they have the underlays to horrible things and they really need to suffer but binding was not a strong part of that Force kids are getting hurt but making them take a break and he's going to be working off campus as the President of the United States and he will be back in the office when he is deemed healthy by the presidents the guard and it's not really helping Trump because he is a lunatic and he has had covid-19 that sounds got brought up was in the hospital so people feel that it's probably not good and it really is not and his son doesn't realize you can't be president if you're not vice president and he's not in yet and he doesn't get that so they're in trouble again and it is John remillard and they're testing him and he'll probably show up positive and they were doing that this to our son this crew of Macklemore and the pseudo empire in the Mac proper and they were torturing him with it Jimmy his grandpa was not involved as wrong they're a bunch of jackasses that are doing it and I guess it's something weird way they're paying for it but they're trying to say that everybody is sick and dying and stuff to try and take over and we are mobilizing to go after their health nuts the healthcare net cases and we are eliminating huge numbers of them as we speak shortly they going to be feeling it and mostly it's these pseudo empire they're the ones doing a lot of it and they're going to be gone and that brings us to the topic of the Western hemisphere as we said they're going to be at three times last night by midnight and we have new estimates that say 3.5 times and they're going to continuously grow it in the army size and they are going to go after the pseudo empire and they will have some spots to try and go after the populace that we will wipe out and quickly if they refill we will wipe them out again Non-Stop this is a war and there expecting us to do nothing and we are continuously doing things and they're really rude but it's going on now right now these things are happening. Soon enough there will be an issue and that will be with the people here they're nasty nasty assholes we will have to remove a lot of them because of their asinine behavior they were exhibiting today almost Non-Stop they're asking for it and they're going to get it they will not leave our son alone for any price and unforgivable and we do realize what we're saying and we know that they're very mean to him we're going to make sure that they're not able to do so in the near future

---there are a couple more things this attitude here that they have with us and others is for the birds we keep throwing it back at him and they keep saying is that the best you can do and things like that so come this week and the next following week we're going to show them what we can do and they are going to be vanquished forever destroyed and gone from the planet and good God what boring nasty individuals and really they just are mean and stupid they don't understand our son and all they can't understand what he's saying and they don't really get technology is watching them 24 hours a day and they have the stuff they're very stupid it's like no people look for excuses just like you to get you people have hatred of you there was a holocaust they know who you were and they're still trying to kill you just like you see with BG or Skarsgard they come out of nowhere and shoot you and you think that they are influenced by something and you're f****** dumb it's old history and yeah most of you don't get it it's really piss poor and this moron keeps trying to develop a history with our son and people he has a history with keep coming out and popping the useless a****** it's really gross. So he's telling bill look this chair at lazy boy that Shaq fits in so he's going to call them up and it's respect and these guys are going to have to stick together and our son says he's already working on it. So Shaquille O'Neal says hey can I have the chair it says oh our son says I can put a moonroof in this. It's very big is on our sun it's like a foot down from the top of the thing that's where it be so Shaquille O'Neal is laughing right now and that's funny you keep saying it's huge in the industry and I'm very big and I know he is but he's not big yet so it's awful there's all these little people whose size it's making me angry not at him but boy is it strange. Okay now locate The ugly duckling. Then those two are cracking up and Preston is laughing and he says stop that with your noise. But there's a problem developing and it's about race and it's horrible these people are triggering a reaction and people are mad at them cheesman is fighting Trump pretty hard and they're going to have a war these two idiots just how much more useless can you be and don't answer that question in any way. And he says trying to be stellar so Sherry shoots him from behind and we know what it means they're going to take on the burden to at least try and keep the max out and he smiles and says that's great he says I'm coming home he says stay there you'll be fine and recuperate you always do and Sherry was smiling and laughing and saying this is great so you have to be careful he's getting people in tuned anyways it must be September almost and she smiles and says yeah it's pretty close so you have only that amount of time to try and then the rest of the clan but it'll be easier she smiles and says this is probably not that bad and really it's not far from it so we are getting ready for a lot of stuff to happen it's going to be huge and these guys are going to do terribly the force here is going to be three times last night in about 20 minutes everybody is getting ready because they're going to try and grow bigger and we have to be ready out there and everywhere it's going to be monstrous more shortly

Thor Freya

Olympus

[listentothelittlebird]

TW: dissociative episode

This was a whole scrapped oneshot, mostly because I couldn’t fit it in properly... I misread something on a wikipedia page and somehow ended up with “Jason revisited Ethiopia sometime during the Red Hood and the Outlaws, and had major PTSD”. I’m fairly sure I was sleep deprived at the time... (I’m honestly happy with how this one turned out, but it was just out-of-place with the rest of the other oneshots)

This is a “deleted scene” from my series on ao3, Code Bat! 

It was a quiet, peaceful night, until the comms crackled to life.

“N,” Oracle called, “RH entered Gotham an hour ago. The new Super he befriended brought him in, but he hasn’t moved from his location since. Can you go check on him?”

Nightwing frowned. Jason was in town? 

He was happy to have a chance to see his Little Wing, of course, but this was an unplanned visit. Usually he would at least radio in ahead, and dramatically announce his return by searching for them during patrol time.

Something was wrong.

“R and I are still dealing with the drug ring,” Batman grunted, “We’ll be with you as soon as we can.”

It seemed even the Bat himself was getting worried.

“I’m turning in for the night. BG’s headed towards RH right now. Let me know how he is, alright?” Spoiler paused, before adding, “I can pull an extra patrol or two, if he needs you guys for company. I’m not an official fam’ member, but I’m more than ready to help.”

Nightwing would have hugged Spoiler if she was standing next to him.

Batgirl was already at the rooftop when Nightwing arrived. She was crouched directly in front of Jason - in his Red Hood outfit, skull-like helmet still on his head - and staring. Nightwing had learnt to read Cass’ body language, and right now she was practically screaming concern. She straightened when Nightwing touched down.

“Unresponsive,” she signed, “Alive, but not there. Like the victims we saw last week.”

Nightwing sighed, a rush of air escaping his chest. It was relief mixed in with new pain, because something had happened to his brother for him to shut down. Something had triggered this.

“RH is dissociating,” Nightwing reported to the comms, “BG says he’s unresponsive. B, once you and R are done, get the Batmobile here.”

“We’re on our way,” came Robin’s tight response, crisp and serious but betraying the slightest of quivers.

In the meantime, Nightwing busied himself with removing Jason’s helmet. His face was blank, devoid of his usual snarky grin or unimpressed eye-roll. His chest was rising and falling in slow, mechanical breaths.

“We’ll take care of you, Little Wing,” Nightwing laid a hand gently on his brother’s shoulder, smiling warmly, “Take all the time you need, okay? We’ll be here.”

There was not so much as a twitch to acknowledge his words. Dick’s gut clenched tighter, even having expected the lack of response.

Batgirl had drifted away, standing several steps back. At Nightwing’s questioning glance, she murmured haltingly, “Scary.” She raised her hands to elaborate.

“No body messages. Nothing. Cannot tell what he is thinking, or if he is thinking. I’m scared for him. With other victims, it’s bad. With family...” the next motion was not proper sign language - she made a heart with her hands, then split it. 

It hurt to see family like this.

Nightwing gave a sad, quiet smile in response, and the way he turned back to eye Jason was enough to convey his agreement.

-

Jason came back to himself slowly.

He was never truly gone, not quite. Not for a while, he thinks. 

He’s… not sure about much. Just that he had been able to tell Artemis and Bizarro that he was going to pull a few strings in Gotham to get them a permanent base. 

He remembered fumbling out an address for a safe house that he had, which would be able to last his two teammates for more than a week. He remembered Biz dropping him off in Gotham. He remembered sitting down on the filthy rooftop.

He thinks Batgirl came, then Nightwing. He thinks they helped him into the Batmobile, and he thinks he saw Batman and Robin. 

He… can’t quite recall what happened next. It was like his memories were grinded to a pulp and then drained of substance, leaving behind the crusts of barely-coherent scenes. Flashes of what had happened.

He was in the Batcave, then he was being walked up the stairs to the Manor, one large arm wrapped around his shoulders, one large hand gripping firmly onto his elbow. 

There was the rustling of old paperbacks, distant and distorted, like hearing through water. 

There was Bruce, blue eyes focused on him, gazing at him and murmuring something soft.

“...here for you. You’re safe, Jaylad.”

He felt a sliver of pressure on his face.

Jason blinked. His hand rose to the spot, to where the mildest of pressures were, a calloused hand cupped against his cheek. He blinked two, three times, Bruce’s face morphing into the most genuine of smiles, even as the smell of the library and faint tightness of hunger greeted him.

“B?” Jason croaked, his voice hoarse from something more than dryness. Bruce was still quick to supply him a cup of water. The hand had yet to leave his cheek. Jason, still thrown off and trying to piece together his scattered mind, leaned into the hand even as he downed the glass.

There was a reason his throat felt scratchy. He had been screaming. Screaming at…

By the time Bruce had plucked his empty glass from his hand and set it down, Jason had jolted violently, as the realisation of how he got here, on exactly why he had returned back to Gotham, hit him like a train.

Ethiopia. The rebuilt warehouse. The living nightmare of his latest Outlaws mission.

“B?” Jason’s voice was desperate now. Logically, he knew Bruce was right there. Trying to convince his tortured mind though, as it finally came to terms with what had happened, was not as simple. 

“Dad? Dad…” Jason’s hands reached blindly for Bruce’s arms, scrambling to tighten clenched fists into the fabric of the man’s sweater. Bruce pulled Jason into his chest.

While Jason tried and failed to quell his breakdown, Bruce had maneuvered himself back onto the couch, Jason sat half in his lap and half on the couch. Jason’s arms, tight around his father’s shoulders, loosened as he let out a shaky gasp.

“We - we had a mission,” Jason rambled before he could stop himself, “Artemis was looking for something, and we were helping her look, and-“

“Jay,” Bruce cut in gently, “Don’t force yourself. Please, son.”

Jason, his forehead pressed to Bruce’s shoulder, shook his head even as he barreled on. He had to get this out before his walls went up again, before it became too blissfully peaceful to even broach the subject.

“I- fuck. We went to Ethiopia,” Jason gave a hollow laugh, even as Bruce sucked in a sharp breath of air, “It was fucking hell, B. Pretty sure they were just doing the generic torture shit on me, but they didn’t even need to do anything, really. The location was enough to…to-“ Jason’s voice cracked. There was something wet leaking out of his eyes.

“It looked exactly the same, B. I checked after - it was the same place. It was-“ Jason’s voice gave out for real, then. 

Bruce pulled him tighter, holding his son close as he cried himself dry. Bruce was just glad that Jason had been able to come back to Gotham, that his son was here for him to comfort - was willing to accept that comfort from him still, even after everything that had happened.

“You’re here,” Bruce hushes, when Jason’s sobs had died down to sniffles. He gave the boy - he would forever be a boy in his eyes - a squeeze around his broad shoulders. “You’re here.”

Jason sniffed again, and squeezed back, tight and desperate.

Later, Alfred would enter, guided by his butler senses to bring a meal for Jason. Later, his siblings would check in on him, and Dick would pile everyone into the living room with a movie marathon and a sleepover. Later, Jason would figure out a permanent base of operations for the Outlaws.

For now, it was just a father holding his son, both undeniably grateful to be alive.

-

Jason led Biz and Artemis to an underground bunker at the outskirts of Metropolis. They were right under Superman’s nose, which was both exhilarating and concerning.

He did not fancy meeting any one of Bruce’s colleagues. 

On the other hand, if Superman did stumble upon them someday soon, Bizarro would finally get to meet someone like him. Well, someone who might see him as family, at least. Jason had heard from Tim that Superman was a big-hearted family man that had taken in Kon-El the moment he had trusted the clone.

He hoped Superman would take Bizarro in. The big guy deserved someone else besides him and Artemis.

Speaking of…

“Say, since we’re gonna be working with each other a lot more from now on, can I get insurance that you won’t take a swing at Wonder Woman while I’m in the collateral damage zone?” 

Artemis glared at him, but Jason had weathered Bat-glares, and this was nothing compared to the man. His helmet was off, so she could see his smirk, his red domino stretching as he raised an eyebrow. 

“I’d have thought you’d be on better terms with the lady. I mean, she’d gladly offer you any support you need,” Jason pointed out.

Artemis huffed, “Themyscira should have done more to aid my tribe. They still have yet to do more to aid my tribe. As Diana is a representative of her people, my grudge is against her tribe, and not her personally. Truthfully, Diana saved my life, and I am grateful for that.”

Jason hummed contemplatively. “Well, you should be a bridge between the two tribes,” Jason thought aloud, “Just saying, you basically became your tribe’s champion by getting back the Bow of Ra. If anyone could get them more aid, it’d be you.”

He could tell that the Amazonian needed time to think on his words, so instead of continuing. Jason splayed his arms, “Besides, sweet-talking gets you places!” 

It was implied that such was how he had gotten their base, but the circumstances were probably far from what Artemis assumed. All Jason had needed to do was talk over conversations during dinner and Bruce was showing him possible locations even before patrol rotations had begun.

Artemis latched onto the new topic, regarding their new base with a satisfied tilt to her head, “What were those connections that you managed to find? Gotham is one place in Man’s World that I have yet to understand.”

“Eh, you learn to deal with the city’s fuckery. Like I said, I just had some old strings that I could pull to get us here,” Jason shrugged, and paused for a moment. Everything had been moving a mile and minute, from when Jason had first met Artemis to when they and Bizarro became a team.

He had neglected to tell them his name. Not that Bizarro needed his name, since he even called Artemis Red Her, but Artemis herself had always referred to Jason as Red Hood or Red.

“Jay.” 

At Artemis’ questioning glance, Jason huffed, “It’s my name, I guess. Close enough.”

It was the name the Titans, Roy and Kori, knew him by. Artemis and Bizarro were shaping up to be his second round of Outlaws, and he wanted them to have his trust, too.

There was a weighty glint in Artemis’ eyes. “It is an honour to work with you, Jay,” she stated solemnly.

Jason cracked a grin, “Aw, c’mon, don’t go all mushy on me. Let’s go get Biz before he ransacks the whole pantry.”

He turned to head in Bizarro’s direction, his loud rummaging making Jason glad he had chosen to put them significantly low underground. Artemis trailed behind with a warm smile.

[rocket-bear]

shinsena ghost fic outline

SO. on my last list of shinsena fic ideas I had written "shinsena ghost AU (yes, like the patrick swayze movie) but with an actually happy ending". I have decided that I'm not actually going to write this fic because 1) it would take forever and I have other ones that are bigger priorities for me and 2) the inspiration for it was really the MOUNTAIN of IT fix-it fics I was reading in early 2020 because I was Going Through It where I then shunted that inspiration over into a fandom I was actually comfortable writing for, and at this point I have moved past that stage and no longer need the catharsis,

BUT! I do really like the bits that I did already write for it, and I still love the idea, so I'm just going to go ahead and post the WIP bits that I did get finished, and then flesh out what the rest of my plan was after!

The fic takes place in Sena's second year of college! It's a ghostfic so, y'know, warning for major character death and copious discussion of grief, haha, but it gets better!!! Also, in addition to ShinSena there's BG mentions of HiruMamo in both the fic excerpts and bulletpoints for the rest of the planned plot. Text below the cut is about 6k words!

---------

"Aw, beans," is the first thing Sena hears after he dies.

He doesn't really process it in the moment, too busy blinking up at the bright, unclouded sun and distantly noticing that it doesn't hurt his eyes. He sits up, running through the last few moments in his mind-- a bouncy ball dotted with pink flowers, skipping merrily over the sidewalk into the street, a girl in her school smock tottering on chubby legs after it, a car unavoidably close, his view of everything blurring as he throws himself forward without even thinking about it--

Oh.

"EHHHH," he shrieks, and scrambles away from his body, and it doesn't come with him.

"I'm going to be in ;so much trouble," that voice says again, and Sena whips around because it's the only thing he can actually hear clearly, even though he's pretty sure he should be able to hear-- the other people around him, looking at his body without looking at him, everyone unharmed but most of them in tears, and he doesn't want to think about that.

So he looks, and sees-- something. It almost looks like an afterimage, at first, the kind of light-dark luminescent spots your eyes put up when you look away from a light you've been staring at too long, but it stays put as Sena stares at it, a kind of void of shifting light just stamped in the way of his view of the bushes lining the sidewalk.

"Um," he says, and the Thing kind of goes more dark-light than light-dark for a moment as it… sighs?

"Yeah, sorry, you're not getting me at my best, this wasn't supposed to happen," it says, and Sena feels like he would be hyperventilating if he had lungs, but he doesn't anymore.

"No, listen," the Thing says, and it starts to get bigger, which Sena belatedly realizes is because it's moved closer to him. With the way it doesn't actually seem to take up space, it's hard to tell. "Let's move away from here, okay? It's going to be hard for you to listen with all this going on."

And, well-- Sena casts a glance back behind him, to the people with their hands over their mouths and tears in their eyes and the pointless things they're doing to his body to try to bring him back to it, and he scrambles up to his feet and follows the thing.

"Okay, here goes," the Thing says as they move further away from the-- the scene, and then its voice changes. "Fear not, mortal, for your time on this plane has elapsed, and you have accomplished all that you were intended for. Your current form--"

"Wait," Sena says, fighting against the mesmerizing effect of the Thing's shifting lights in combination with its new, multilayered voice, high and low at once but somehow soothing. "I thought you said this wasn't supposed to happen??"

"Well, okay, yeah," the Thing says, its voice reedy and thin once more. "Your time actually isn't supposed to be up, but-- okay, did you know you're like, really fast? Like crazy fast. I was just supposed to nudge the driver once they stopped the car in time, you know, typical near-death experience stuff, but you jumped right through me before I was in place."

"You kill people by touching them?!" Sena skitters away from the Thing, and gets the distinct impression that the silvery flush it pulses in response is decidedly unimpressed.

"I can't kill you again," it says. "And we don't kill things, anyway. We just… mark them as finished. I got you out of the oven too soon, that's all."

That sounds a lot like it was only different from killing things in terms of word choice to Sena, but he doesn't say so.

"C-can-- can we fix it?" He asks instead, the first shards of ice-cold realization sinking in at last. He's dead. He's dead?

The Thing flares sigh-dark, and says, "You know this kind of thing has only happened like, four times before? Ever! Since the dawn of humanity! It's been like 20,000 years since the last time! I don't know off the top of my head, kid, I'm gonna have to look it up."

"Then-- there's a chance? How long will that take? What if-- I mean-- they're gonna take me to the hospital--"

The ice shards sink further into his body, but the Thing's voice is dismissive.

"If there's a way, that's not the body you're going to be coming back to; there's no way we're gonna be able to do this without rolling back the clock. So don't worry about the morgue, okay?"

Which-- was a relief, but Sena feels an empty sensation at the word "morgue" that he's pretty sure would have been nausea if he had a working stomach left to experience it.

Some of that must show on his face because the Thing comes to an abrupt stop, and its voice is more gentle as it says, "Okay, gameplan. If there's a way to get you back, it's gonna have something to do with the energy left over from your presence among the living. So go see your friends and family and see what you can figure out. Right now, you're a ghost, so there's got to be some way to tap into that energy."

Sena nods a little numbly at first, working on auto-pilot, and then nods more firmly as he actually processes the Thing's words. A plan! That means-- there's something he can actually do, while the Thing goes to-- "look it up." That's good! A plan!

And then, the Thing goes yellowish, and its tone turns apologetic.

"And… Speaking of ghost stuff, I didn't get to finish this part before. Your current form will let you move around this plane to visit your loved ones and grant yourself any closure you desire, but you won't be able to interact with the living world, and if we're not able to fix this in time-- when the time comes, you'll have to make a choice. Move on completely to the next plane, or stay here with your loved ones until there are none left who remember you."

Sena blinks, going still, and the Thing glows even more yellow.

"So we've got about [a month] to figure this thing out. I'll do what I can, kid. You hang tight."

And then it's gone, and Sena is left alone on the sidewalk.

He does all that he can do, and goes to find Mamori.

------

He doesn't think through the consequences of that until he gets to her apartment and finds her in tears and Hiruma on the phone, calling them an escort to the hospital. Every awful minute of that first day feels like nothing more than a smear in Sena's memory by the time his funeral comes around. He spends the time in-between trying his best to do something, anything, that will let his friends and parents know that he's still there. He does his absolute best to go full Hollywood Haunting on everyone he knows, trying to knock over pictures or rattle windows or flick lights on and off, but nothing works. Every once in a while, when he's flopped beside Mamori on the floor as she goes through photo albums, he almost thinks she hears him as he talks about the photos she's flipping through-- but it always just ends up being a fresh round of quiet tears that brings Hiruma over to her side.

The funeral seems to be no different. He'd hoped, somehow, that maybe having so many loved ones gathered in one place to think about him would somehow give him the energy to make himself solid-- and there are so many people there, not just Sena's family and closest friends, but people from nearly every team in the Tokyo American football community, some of them who he only ever remembered seeing across the field.

All of the original Devil Bats are there, of course. Kurita sobs his way through the service. The Ha-Ha Brothers stand stony-faced, and Juumonji scrubs a rough hand across his eyes, but Sena never sees any tears. Suzuna clings to Monta's arm as they both cry openly with Riku in the row behind Sena's parents, Mamori, and Hiruma.

His parents cry. Mamori seems too exhausted to, just sitting quietly and taking in the service with bruised red eyes. Hiruma puts his arm around her shoulder at one point, and Sena finds himself surprised by how much tenderness he's seen between them in the last few days. Hiruma had handled almost all of the arrangements, actually-- Mamori and Sena's parents making the decisions, and Hiruma diligently rising from each discussion to make the appropriate phone calls.

In the middle rows, Sena finds himself looking at Shin and Sakuraba. He shouldn't have been surprised to see them-- and he really wasn't, not really, he knew he would be devastated and would definitely show up if the situation was reversed-- but something on Shin's face startles him into looking again.

He looks tired. Sena doesn't think he's ever seen Shin tired, before, not even after playing full-out through an entire game, not even after the most intensive of training. But Shin's face is undeniably drawn, and the skin underneath his eyes is bruise-dark.

Sakuraba tears up, and Shin doesn't, but it's Sakuraba who lays a comforting hand on Shin's shoulder. [UNFINISHED SCENE-- also I had intended to go back and make this scene more accurately reflect Japanese (vs Western) funeral traditions but have not done that since, I'm not finishing the fic]

----------

He finds himself seeking out one of his and Shin's old training routes from high school, when they lived close enough that it made sense to share. It's been years since he ran this route, but it makes sense, he figures, that he would be revisiting old memories like this. It was a good route, anyway-- at one point it ran alongside the river, and Sena remembers reaching it on hot summer days, and noticing that even Shin tipped his face into the breeze when the sun was really beating down.

He walks along the path at first, but before long finds himself jogging, the force of memory and habit alike drawing him into those quick strides. It doesn't feel the same without the sensation of the wind on his face, or the heat of the sun on his body, or even the sweat beading up stickily between his skin and his clothes, but it's something.

Without fatigue or fear of obstacles to keep him vigilant, Sena finds himself startled before too long by the sound of steady footfalls coming up behind him. He automatically shifts his path to make way-- though it doesn't matter much now, he thinks with a frown-- and looks up as the lone jogger makes to pass him.

It's Shin.

Sena's not-heart squeezes painfully at seeing him unexpectedly, and Sena gapes.

"Shin-san--" He gasps, and of course Shin doesn't respond or look his way. Sena swallows the painful reminder and adjusts his pace to match Shin's.

They run together, and of course it's quiet, because Shin doesn't know that he has company. Not that companionable silence was atypical for their runs together before-- running was for focusing on technique, including breathing, so they would save the chatting for before and after.

Sena wonders if Shin had kept to running this path all along-- he was so sure that they'd both abandoned it when they'd made their way to university. Or at least, Shin had apologetically told him so, when he'd moved on to Oujou University and Sena was still in his third year at Deimon.

Maybe Shin's feeling nostalgic too, Sena thinks, and then shakes his head. He doesn't want to be sad, and it's nice to have Shin at his side, even if Shin doesn't know he's there.

He tries to sink into the feeling of running. It's still hard-- he can't feel much of anything, after all-- but with Shin there, it's a little easier to fall into old memories and let those guide him. He can pretend-- to feel the gentle breeze off the river cooling the sweat on his face, to feel the push of the sidewalk under his feet launching him into his next step, to feel how the sun is hotter on his back and shoulders than anywhere else as it crawls its way up the sky.

It almost feels like normal, finding that rhythm alongside Shin that has their steps striking the pavement in tandem, Sena's extra stride to make up for their heights a little accented half-note; that peaceful, focused haze that has them inhaling and exhaling in synch. It's so perfectly familiar that Sena can almost imagine a lump rising in his throat and the sting of tears in his eyes, nearly overcome with the twin sensations of having and loss--

--when Shin startles hard beside him and skids to a stop, with a gasp that has Sena's blood running cold before he even looks back for him, the image of the oncoming truck flashing through his mind.

But there's no truck here, of course. They're on a running trail, on a totally separate level than the road, but it's obvious enough what drew that terrifying, uncharacteristic noise from Shin's lungs when Sena looks back, and his eyes meet Shin's.

Shin sees him.

[UNFINISHED SCENE, this is the last of the actual fic that I wrote!]

---------

FROM THERE here was the plan:

- Shin being able to see him only lasts a split second. Shin's super shaken and keeps looking around and rubbing his eyes for a couple moments, and then he turns around and walks back to the train, and Sena-- thinking, like, "holy shit, Shin never skips training"-- follows him back, because even though it's super heart-breaking seeing Shin so shaken up it's also the closest he's gotten to making any progress the whole time

- Shin gets back to his dorm and just like. sits down at his table with his head in his hands. Sena's motivation to keep trying to get his attention kind of dries up so he pokes around Shin's dorm room instead and notices, like. a bunch of half-eaten meals/snacks in the trash, "Practice" scratched out on his calendar for the next few weeks, unmade bed, evidence that Shin's only really gotten dressed to go out jogging over the last few days and is only wearing his pajamas otherwise-- he's just not doing good.

- Just as Sena's like, really starting to grasp this, Sakuraba shows up at the door-- Shin gets up to answer the door with his back to Sena and like, whatever Sakuraba sees on Shin's face just stops him in his tracks and he immediately pulls Shin into a hug, which Sena is kind of shocked to see that Shin totally sinks into

- Sakuraba sits down with Shin at the table and they talk. Shin admits that he thought he saw Sena while he was jogging, and both of them are just brushing it off as like, a grief-induced sensory memory, stuff like that happens, etc. Sakuraba comforts him and encourages Shin to take it easy, it's okay to take time off of even his own personal training, it's okay if he needs more time, and also like fusses about Shin not getting enough to eat especially if he IS going to keep training

- Sena meanwhile is like, feeling awful with guilt but also just kind of overwhelmed with the realization of how important he was to Shin, and this is where I would've like, laid the groundwork for how they'd gotten closer during the rest of high school/early college but Sena still never rrreally understood how much Shin cared about him because 1) he's got self-esteem issues baybee, and 2) Shin is not exactly, like, super forthright about his feelings,

- but, while Sena DOES feel awful about how much Shin was shaken up about seeing him, it's the only thread he can think of to pull on to try and bring himself back, and he ALSO feels guilty about having to watch everyone grieve for him, so, well,

- he starts haunting Shin!! Shin does not listen to his good and helpful friend Sakuraba and goes jogging again the next day, but it's obvious that he's still feeling Off and he's having a hard time getting into a rhythm, and Sena isn't able to tap into ~whatever it was~ that made him visible the previous time and is feeling super defeated about it, UNTIL,

- Shin takes a break at the midpoint of his normal route, which is a thing Sena knows he does not generally do from their own training together, and is basically just slumped over on a bench with his head in his hands again and Sena's also feeling awful and helpless and does the same thing,

- and then Shin tenses up beside him, his breath getting shallow, and Sena notices and tentatively calls out to him. Shin slowly, slowly looks up, and they make eye contact for just a second again, before Sena can tell he's not visible anymore because Shin's eyes kind of unfocus and he looks away, and just gets up and goes home.

- This kind of refreshes Sena's determination, and over the next few days (IT WAS GONNA DEPEND ON HOW LONG I WANTED TO TORTURE SHIN) they repeat the same pattern, with Sena going on Shin's jogs with him and occasionally achieving small flashes of visibility(/audibility, though Sena isn't ever able to get out anything helpful before the universe mutes him again) which Shin seems to be determined to just brush off as grief illusions even as he gets more and more tense each time

- Until finally as they're jogging, Shin sort of tersely asks "Are you there?" and instead of saying anything Sena just tries to barrel into him for a hug because clearly auditory-visual haunting only isn't WORKING and we've gotta get some TACTILE FEEDBACK in here,

- and it works. He knocks Shin off of his stride, and Shin grabs for him in turn, and there's a moment where they both stare at each other in total shock and relief before Sena starts trying to frantically tell Shin the whole story and disappears out of his arms like, three words in.

- Shin has a little tiny mental breakdown in the middle of the sidewalk where he cycles from devastation at Sena disappearing again to trying to pull himself together like, "okay if this is real then this isn't my last chance because it's happened a lot over the past few days" to a kind of giddy catharsis because it's real Sena's really here to kind of shutting down over the idea that maybe it's STILL not real and he's just going REALLY crazy to actually pulling himself back together and going to find a bench to sit down on, and just like,

- talking things out, out loud, in hopes that Sena can hear him. He can only see Sena when they're running, which is something they used to do together, so maybe recreating old memories is what triggers it. He's noticed that even when running, he usually sees Sena in moments when he's feeling least conflicted/emotionally complex-- either pure grief or pure nostalgia or pure just-zoning-out-running, not as much when he's really struggling to process and has a lot going on internally at once. Maybe the stability of the emotion is part of it.

- Sena meanwhile is having his own meltdown from sheer overwhelming relief over FINALLY FINALLY making contact and Shin FINALLY FINALLY believing he's there and also just like making hearteyes at Shin for immediately going into full methodical Ghost Scientist mode after getting his own meltdown over and done with

- speaking of going full Ghost Scientist, Shin announces his intention to do exactly that by saying he's heading back to his and Sena's old running trail to test out the "recreating memories" theory right that second, and they head over.

- They jog, and Shin talks out some of his memories with Sena from his own perspective, which is a surprise for Sena because he doesn't even remember some of the things that Shin does and also it lets him actually understand what Shin was thinking in those moments.

- And most importantly: it works. It's not constant, but the longer they practice, the longer they're able to keep Sena in view for longer stretches of time, more of an unsteady flicker than the total off-or-on that it was before. They stay out for a long time (and in the process discover that other people still can't see Sena when Shin can as he continually gets weird looks for talking to thin air) and Shin actually eats a real meal when he finally goes home.

- Sena and Shin keep practicing over the next few days, which makes Sakuraba SUPER concerned because Shin spending hours and hours jogging every day looks like Shin further depression-spiralling from his perspective, but he's somewhat mollified by the fact that Shin's actually getting back to eating and getting dressed etc. normally, even though he's still not going to practice.

- During this time, Sena and Shin bond when they're actually able to communicate. Sena notices that Shin's parents haven't checked in on him even once despite the fact that he just lost a friend, and Shin confirms in one conversation that he basically doesn't have a relationship or emotional connection with his parents at all. (But watch, hang in there, I'm gonna fix it,)

- In the meantime, Shinigami-san tracks Sena back down and they both share what they've learned. Shinigami-san says that Sena has to gather energy from as many of the people he's formed bonds with as possible to chain himself more strongly to life, and gives him a pendant to wear around his neck that will store the energy. When Sena talks about his and Shin's experiments, It says that it makes sense that being emotionally and physically in-sync would help bolster the connection between them to the point where other people would be able to see him, and that if they practice enough they might even be able to just use one or the other (emotional sync or physical sync) without needing both.

- After Sena laboriously relays this to him through flickers, Shin gets a metronome and they both practice tapping their fingers to the rhythm, and they're finally able to see each other at Shin's dorm room vs having to be on a run and actively reminiscing together. They develop a system where when Shin wants/needs to see him, he'll tap his finger against the side of his leg and Sena will do the same thing so they can actually talk.

(- There is at least one moment in the development of this that, when Sena successfully appears in front of him, Shin smiles fondly and very softly says, "There you are," and Sena immediately disappears again because he's so shaken to his disaster bisexual core that he can't even handle it.)

- During this process they find out that Sena's pendant glows when Shin is reminiscing or otherwise talking about his feelings (but not the capital-L feeling) about Sena, which lets them know how to go about "gathering energy" from Sena's friends.

- With the clock counting down on Sena's deadline, Shin starts approaching Sena's friends to "check on them," or, to sit down with them and talk about Sena. It's a little awkwardly sweet on both sides, because no one expects Shin of all people to be making sympathy housecalls and Shin's not very good at talking about feelings, but the conversations are surprisingly genuine and cathartic for all parties (including Shin, who is still processing some weird sideways grief even with his new connection to ghostSena, and Sena, whose self-esteem issues have a hard time standing up under a deluge of people talking about how much they cared about and miss him), PARTICULARLY:

- Monta and Suzuna, where the reminiscing works a little too well and they actually see a flicker of Sena sitting at Shin's side during the conversation and freak out. Shin immediately changes tacks and tells them that Sena is there and that he's trying to bring Sena back and he needs their help, and at first this makes them freak out more because what the fuck but by virtue of Shin being… Seijuurou "Overly-Serious-Stoic-Never-Overreacted-In-His-Life" Shin, he convinces them to try the tapping technique to bring Sena back into view.

- Sena has Shin describe a memory involving the three of them while they tap along to Shin's rhythm, and the combination of reminiscing and tapping works well enough that they're able to get frequent enough flickers of Sena to believe Shin. Yes, they do get a least one good long group hug out of the flickers, I'm not a monster.

- Shin still has to do most of the communication for Sena because it would take a lot of practice for the Sena-Monta-Suzuna combo to get enough in-sync to be able to communicate effectively, but he explains the whole situation and all the information they've gotten from Shinigami-san. They decide that it still makes the most sense for Shin to field the energy-gathering housecalls for the same communication-based reasons-- Sena can guide Shin through the conversations by suggesting memories to bring up with his friends-- but all the same, Shin suddenly finds himself with two tiny new best friends who want to hang out with him all the time. (And not even just to talk to Sena! Suzuna and Monta become pretty attached to and curious about Shin after he shows them more of his vulnerable side in the conversation leading up to the point where they actually see Sena themselves.)

- I was going to go through little flashes of Shin's conversations with a lot of Sena's friends across the football world, but the other Big One was going to be Mamori, of course. (And a little bit of Hiruma, who refuses to sit down for an Emotional Conversation with fucking Shin, but will gladly peanut-gallery Mamori's out of his own repressed desire for catharsis and also to make sure with guns loaded that Shin doesn't fuck up the fragile acceptance Mamori's been building since Sena's death.)

- Having learned from the experience with Suzuna and Monta, Sena wisely sits out of view during the conversation because he actually doesn't want to put Mamori through the rollercoaster of seeing him again, especially if his and Shin's efforts fail.

- Shin does not fuck up his conversation with Mamori and so Hiruma doesn't have to murder him! It's actually the most honest-- and healing-- conversation he has with anyone. Mamori finds herself feeling very fond of Shin, who she didn't know was so close with Sena and could be so supportive and empathetic under all that stoic strength, and Shin finds himself immediately adopted by another one of Sena's loved ones.

(- In their conversation, Mamori also mentions that just after Sena passed she kept finding herself thinking she heard Sena's voice, because that seed in the actually-written bit above was in fact foreshadowing ohoho.)

- I was not going to Go Into It because not even I have the strength, but to continue the theme of Shin finding a new family via his bond with Sena, there was going to be a brief scene referencing that Shin's visit with Sena's parents went much the same, with the addition that Shin was surprised Sena's parents already knew so much about him (because as it turns out Sena talked about him FREQUENTLY.)

(- Also within the housecalls there's a comedy scene where Shin makes Sena solid just long enough for Sena to log Shin in on Skype so he can talk to Panther without sacrificing a computer, and they discover that international friendship energy gathering does in fact work.)

- AND THEN: SAKURABA. The fic would switch to Shin's POV from here! In Shin's energy-gathering conversation with Sakuraba, things are going well at first, with Sakuraba reminiscing about Sena and then turning the conversation toward Shin himself to talk about how he's noticed Shin's seeming a lot more steady and like he's been doing some real healing lately. Shin obviously does not explain the ghostSena situation, but does honestly say that his conversations with Sena's other friends have helped him process his feelings a lot. And Sakuraba, being a supportive friend, very gently says that he's proud of Shin for reaching out, and for doing so well when he's going through something so hard, because he can't imagine losing the person he was in love with.

- Shin freezes up, and Sakuraba tries to reassure him that it's okay, he's known for a long time, he's so sorry that Shin never got to actually process those feelings with Sena, and Shin doesn't have to talk about it but if he ever wants to Sakuraba's there for him-- and Shin very stiltedly deflects the whole conversation because he doesn't want to totally shut Sakuraba down when he's just trying to be supportive but also Sena is right there

- After finally, awkwardly shooing Sakuraba out the door, Shin sits back down and tries to Talk About It with Sena, but he's so emotionally frazzled that he's not able to get a stable connection. Since they can't have a two-way conversation, he just launches into apologizing-- he's sorry, he understands if it makes Sena uncomfortable, Sena doesn't need to feel obligated to respond to it and of course Shin is going to help him finish getting what he needs regardless--

- Sena's just RAPIDLY flickering in and out of view, with the time he's not visible getting longer and longer as Shin keeps talking because they are incredibly emotionally out-of-sync, and with Shin only able to tell that Sena looks upset whenever he's able to see him, he makes some Assumptions about Sena's feelings about his accidental confession.

- Things don't get better over the next day or two. They try to do their synchronizing exercises, but even reciting memories doesn't help because Shin is too anxious and ashamed (and sleep-deprived from stress) to connect to them emotionally, which is only compounded because he realizes that Sena's deadline is fast approaching and they won't be able to finish in time if he can't get his shit together but that anxiety Does Not Help with relaxing enough to synchronize when he's spiralling over the thought of losing Sena again because of something that he "did".

- Finally, Sena apparently gets desperate and snatches up the metronome during one of the moments when he's solid for just long enough to do it.

- Shin doesn't see him for a while after that, and assumes (correctly) that Sena has taken the metronome with him to try and sync with Monta and/or Suzuna instead, and also assumes (incorrectly) that this is because Sena is extremely disappointed with him at best and totally hates him at worst, and that either way Sena probably doesn't want much to do with him anymore even if he is able to be brought back.

- He spirals for like, A Day, after which he does in fact break and go to tear up very stoically on Sakuraba about how yes he was (is) in love with Sena and it hurts him that he'll never get to express that properly (now that Sena wants nothing to do with him) and how he feels like he let himself (and Sena) down by not being able to act on that earlier (when it wasn't a literal life-or-death situation) and how maybe he's just not cut out for emotions and connections with other people actually, just look at even his relationship with his parents???

- Sakuraba comforts him and very gently tells him he's being a catastrophizing dingus and shows him, like, a mountain of texts on his phone not ONLY from concerned fellow Oujous, but also from a bunch of the people that Shin's talked to about Sena over the last few weeks, all of them expressing the general sentiment of "wow I was super surprised when Shin came around to talk to me about Sena but I'm so glad he did, it looks like he's doing well, keep an eye on him for me" in varying levels of transparency because after all they are Manly Footballers, but regardless: look at that, Shin is actually perfectly capable of forming relationships with other people, and they like and care about him.

- This results in some decidedly less stoic tears, and Sakuraba and Shin successfully patch things up after their previous awkward discussion about Shin's feelings for Sena. When Shin leaves he immediately heads for Enma to try and find Monta, because even if Sena and his friends don't want to see him he absolutely can't just shrug and sit back and just wait to see if they manage to save him.

- When he's like halfway there, he comes across Monta and Suzuna heading in his direction, and they cut off his questions by just being like NOPE SHUT UP COME WITH US and dragging him over to like, a park gazebo for some semi-privacy.

- Suzuna gets the metronome out of her bag and sets it on the park table and turns it on. Monta pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket and starts reading.

- It turns out that after he left Shin's, Sena ghosted up into Monta's room and just plopped the suddenly-appearing metronome down on Monta's desk, scaring the shit out of him but also giving a very clear signal of WE NEED TO TALK. Monta called up Suzuna and the three of them had spent the last day and a half working on synchronizing non-stop, and while they still aren't nearly as good as Shin and Sena had gotten with weeks' worth of practice, they got far enough along that Sena was able to have them slowly write out some of his memories with Shin, this time from his perspective, through the unsteady connection.

- Suzuna and Monta take turns yanking the paper back and forth between them to read out the description of Sena and Shin's memories, and with Shin tapping along to the metronome, he's able to see Sena more and more clearly over time until he's solid more often than not.

- As it becomes increasingly clear, even to Shin, that these specific memories Sena has chosen to share are a record of him coming to realize his feelings for Shin, Sena is eventually able to take Shin's hands and hold them without disappearing, tapping not needed. He interrupts Suzuna and Monta to try to finish off the confession himself: Shin didn't need to be scared when Sena found out about his feelings, because--

- Absolutely overwhelmed by everything about the last 36 hours and having no ability to process any of it in words ANYMORE but moved by the SPIRIT OF COMMUNICATION regardless, Shin gambles on the pretty sure bet that he and Sena are in-sync about this, and kisses him.

- It connects. (And connects, and connects...) Sena's pendant starts to glow brighter and brighter until he's totally enveloped, and--

- Switch back to Sena's POV! He wakes up on the street in front of the truck again, scraped up but otherwise totally unharmed. So are the little girl, who he successfully pushed out of the way, and the driver of the car, who stopped in time regardless. Shinigami-san is also there, and Sena tells It to leave the driver alone because It owes him one, and Shinigami-san congratulates him and tells him that hey hey that was the plan along!! (The onlookers assume that he's confused from the near-accident when he starts talking to thin air.)

- Sena waves off all the concerned onlookers and runs off to find somewhere to sit where he's not going to be gawked at so he can text literally everyone he knows. By the time he finds a bench, he's already gotten HOLY SHIT WE JUST TIME-TRAVELED ARE YOU OKAY??? texts from Monta and Suzuna, which he responds to and incites a flood of emoji-based cheering. Everyone else he texts is politely puzzled by his "are you okay???" message, including Mamori and his parents to his intense relief, except--

- He gets a call from Sakuraba, who sounds very confused as he tells him that Shin wants to talk to him. Sena reassures Shin that he's okay, and tells him to meet him at the park that they left off at, and also that he loves him because he can't restrain himself after not getting to say it before. Shin says it back, and Sakuraba therefore sounds both confused AND delighted when he gets the phone back from Shin to say goodbye.

- Sena texts Suzuna and Monta to meet him at the same place, since it's about halfway between Enma and Oujou, and starts running.

- Shin and Sena, being… Shin and Sena, get there before the other two, and there's so many tears and so much hugging and so many I Love Yous and also some apologies. Monta and Suzuna eventually arrive and there's another round of tears and hugging and I Love Yous, and when everyone is less punchdrunk off of trauma and catharsis, they sit down and figure out that it's only the people that actually saw Sena as a ghost that remember the other timeline.

- With the group understandably not ready to be separated under the circumstances, but also with Sena desperately wanting to see his parents, Mamori and Riku, he comes up with a thin excuse for an impromptu dinner party at his parents' place later in the day (celebrating passing a tough test? beat the Cupids in a football game? national pancake day?? doesn't matter!!!), clears it with them, and invites Mamori+Hiruma and Riku over as well. (Shin lets Sena arrange takeout for everyone on his dime so that Sena's parents won't have to cook for an unplanned dinner party.)

- Fic ends with the group heading toward Sena's parents' house, Shin and Sena holding hands, with Sena feeling content and confident in his relationships as his phone continuously blows up with people responding to his check-in text, and Shin admitting that he's feeling pretty hopeful about the idea of getting to form connections with Sena's family all over again.

END. Thanks for indulging my "I'm too lazy to write this but NOT too lazy to bulletpoint each plot detail beat-by-beat" post, haha!

[actualaster]

Oops it’s been a damn month because my ability to watch anything dropped off the face of the planet but I’m trying to play catch-up on the anime now lol.

Don’t have the energy to go back over Ep 4 and do a proper look at it like I was doing, so I’ll just...  Maybe re-address that later, but for now just looking at Ep 5

I don’t have the energy to do the “watch then post” thing so I’ll be putting this together as I go, and probably will do that from now on.

First up Asshole Jesus starting things out being a little shit, just look at that smile, his face is so punchable.  (affectionate)

Yeah I see you on your phone, Asshole Jesus, texting Neku a fake mission and then acting like you weren’t doing anything lmao

Trying to advertise for Mr. H’s menu lol

I see you neatly dodging the answer to that question, Josh.

Does a really good job of conveying his whole “the Game is amusement for me” attitidue, though

The game pretty strongly implied it as well, but I feel like the anime goes even further to all but say that Joshua “I See Dead People” Kiryu killed himself to join the Reapers’ Game.

No, Neku, you haven’t, he’s Asshole Jesus for a reason

Mmm, more of that wording that makes it pretty blatant that Josh offed himself.

Nice callback to the game itself with the style of the error message!  It’s how, like, memes look when you get them and other various selectable options and stuff appear in-game.

Neat way they handle it being a smartphone now, using apps instead of a camera hardware upgrade.  Also that triple star app, that reminds me of the Fusion Pin for Shiki’s lvl 1 and 2 fusions in the game

Would it kill ya to be a less of a mysterious dick, Josh?  Yeah actually it probably would.

Lol sounds like Mr. H is speaking from experience.  He has known Asshole Jesus for a while so that makes sense.  

Heh.  They’re having an entirely different conversation than the one Neku is aware of.

Mmm, can’t have him going down that way until you’re good and ready, eh, Josh?

Heh.  Looks like Neku’s not entirely sure he trusts that “it’s because the signal from Scramble’s weirder” thing

Oh, that’s not ominous at all (/sarcasm)

Mmm, feels like this part was handled a little more...  Flatly than the game did, like it’s less of a big deal as a possible theory in the anime?

I see that Gatito brand logo in the BG with this convo, nice and subtle.

Oh!  They include the Mic Incident?

Something I noticed is interesting--you can sort of tell in the previous screenshot the lighting seems...  Not bright and sunny.

You can also see it here

I just think it’s interesting that it’s cloud and then we get to this shot, very dark in general, you can see the extremely dark clouds in the background, the lighting in general much more washed out the way you get on a very cloudy day...  And Players, fighting for their lives against the black-and-silver Taboo Noise.

I just think that’s a really neat visual thing.

askdjfjakdsf  THE SPEECH BUBBLE WITH THE IMAGE OF THE MIC!!  I’M!!  oh I love that so much lol

sad.fjasdlkf THEY KEPT THE LINE.�� bless

Changed up the scene with Nao and Sota, misses the sweet “totally be an entry fee for each other/play the game as many times as needed” part but I did love the way Sota tried to stop Neku from going to the Taboo Noise infested area to keep him from getting killed.  Flow of the scene works well for the shift to anime, though, so makes sense they’d change things up a bit.  Speaking of...  They cut the Tin Pin stuff, didn’t they?  Shame but it makes sense because...  I can’t see that flowing well in the anime lol.  Maybe if they made a spin-off anime only about Tin Pin Slammer...  XD

sadjkflaksdjfas  LOOK AT HER GUN TIP LMAO THEY ACTUALLY SHOWED A REASON WHY HER ENERGY BULLETS ARE WEIRDLY SHAPED LMAO

okay that’s fantastic I love that so much

Fusion attack, nice

Josh just.  LOVES being a little shit, doesn’t he

Oh, this ENTIRE SCENE is so much more dramatic, it’s amazing to see it brought to life in animation.

No seriously this is a lot more what I’d expect from somebody who just discovered the dude they work with very probably murdered the fuck out of them

The way Neku stumbles back with that horrified gasp (seriously the sound he makes--props to the VA that conveyed the emotion of the scene so damn well), that terrified expression on his face, his entire body language of “person receiving a horrific shock” is so well executed here.

Plus, can’t really catch it with screenshots but the way the screen is shifting and sort of “shaky cam” really helps convey it 

That facial expression is so perfect, you can see him breaking.

Look, you can pinpoint the exact frame where he shatters!

Aaaaand then we got Asshole Jesus looking like a smug fuck, as usual lol.  Solid spot to end an ep, though.