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appleslightning · 6 months

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The Favourite

#drarry #dronarry #fic art #draco malfoy #harry potter #harry x draco #ron weasley #IT WAS A PLEASURE TO DRAW THIS FOR MALL #im still shook about this fic #cant stop thinking about it #it changed me #dron #whoever gets all the references from the fic gets a prize #mine

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stressedanime · 6 months

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just received +25 psychic damage by relating song lyrics to the treatment of demigods in pjo

#coffins by misterwives #when i tell yall i made myself nauseous #i heard the lyrics “how do you soften the thought of carrying coffins? we were so alive only to see us wither and die” and i thought of #lester carrying jasons coffin to camp jupiter #this entire song feels like demigods who once had faith in the gods. but just can't anymore after being used for so long #god what i could do if i could edit videos still #lyrics “your ego swallowed you and from there you fled so far away could not find your way back”#SO lester coded #OH FUCK IT GETS WORSE #“i shook your ears tried to make you hear my call but you were long gone. no hope in a sunless dawn”#tell me thats not piper when shes holding jasons body #oh my GOD I SHOULD BE SLEEPING RN BUT SDJFKSLNFJSKLNJK im inflicting the damage on myself at this point #trials of apollo #the burning maze #toa spoilers #tbm spoilers #jason grace #lester papadopoulos #piper mclean #percy jackson #pjo #oh my GOD upon further analysis #it could also be very much thalia @ luke coded #about his corruption and turning his back on demigods #ohhhhhh this song is going to be the death of me

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nabaath-areng · 1 day

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Sometimes I think to myself "actually maybe I'm exaggerating the terror I felt from being stalked", but then I remember that the person in question followed me and waited for me outside my school every day, tracked me down on every website I'd spent even the slightest time on, left physical letters in my mailbox, sent creepy as hell novel length messages on a near daily basis on FB. And then when I was living abroad and I answered the phone I told the caller to text me cause I couldn't hear, after which I had to read "I was saying that you would probably be VERY scared if you knew who's calling... hehe" with my own damn fucking eyes...

And then I'm like yknow what nevermind!!!! the fact that I'm still terrified of being perceived and seen in public not just IRL but also FFXIV might be understandable actually!!!

#im not saying its what caused my psychotic breakdown cause there were many factors #but needless to say it played a HUGE part especially surrounding the debilitating paranoia i was left with for years #i should mention that i only learned LAST YEAR that this person supposedly gave up according to them #by an old mutual classmate (the only one im still in contact with sadly because this person destroyed all the connections i held dear)#(we were classmates for years and this fucked me up cause we were friends for years before it all went down)#but yeah so last year they gave up apparently and it started 2012.#id managed to evade their notice online since 2019 when they last contacted me on facebook and i assumed id simply shook them off #given the habits i developed as a result of it that still affect me in ways i hate #but yeah its only been about a year of feeling relatively safe for the first time since 2012... and even then only relatively #cause i have no idea how permanent that is. and i dont dare to fully relax knowing what the person is capable of in terms of violence #hysterically tumblr is one of the very places online where they never found me it seems #but yeah. apparently they can just move on and here i am meanwhile still feeling the effects #such as feeling like im drenched in ice even in fucking *ffxiv* just because someones targeting or emoting at me #even though its never actually a problem! its a normal thing! and yet that brief moment of dread and fear seems to stick #IDK WHY IM RANTING ABOUT THIS I WAS JUST REMINDED AND. AURGH #awful. horrible. hopefully itll be fine forevermore and that ill be able to relax one day #silvi talks

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the-eclectic-wonderer · 4 months

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Jonathan continues to be the most relatable character ever

#me too jonathan me too #sorry for memeing. today’s entry is *harrowing* but this opening line took me out #that being said… the *gull* of making your victim write those letters himself…#i was about to write that the count doesn’t think Jonathan is That stupid but actually? he might. he looks down on all humanity #so he might actually be still convinced that Jonathan hasn’t caught on yet #(despite what Jonathan himself says)#in any case he’s approaching the Done Playing stage. i suppose the episode with the Brides shook him up more than he lets on #he fears he won’t be able to keep Jonathan alive for himself much longer I guess?#so he’s taking action now #the sheer *terror* Jonathan must be experiencing. being made to write letters that will cover up your own gruesome death…#he’s keeping such a level head about all this he’s *amazing*#im actually in awe of him #dracula daily

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deus-ex-mona · 26 days

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i miss her…

#cant believe i forgot about her till the photobook q&a im so sorry witch mona~~~~~~~#press f for honeypre atelier gachas it was gone too soon™️#(currently e x t r e m e l y worried and stressed for tomorrow like never before b u t i have to appear like im fine sobs save me monachann)#(can i go on a stress-prompted tangent here about something inane? no? toooo bad im gonna go off anyway~~~~)#ok so. like. since witch mona is the image i have up ‘ere and since it’s still 七月… today’s tangent will be on irl spooky stories!!#s o. presenting a decently repressed memory from my childhood that resurfaced while i was hibernating at home:#anyways. well. thoughts about the afterlife can vary from person to person yes? there’s no one true correct belief after all #but the one question that unites us all is probably the one and only ‘are ghosts real?’#and well. for personal reasons i think so. i mean i’ve seen this one dude i hate get possessed a couple of times so welp. cant deny it ig.#wild story about that actually. back in the day my family’s finances were allegedly doing so badly that [dude i hate] had to pick up #a *c e r t a i n* side hustle for extra cash. that side hustle? literal grave digging at the cemetary. at night no less #and *ofc* he wasn’t respectful about it in the least so ofc some spirits followed him home. yay. free roommates.#one(?) of them even took residence in my room at the time and im 80% sure they ate my history textbook :( much sads #anyways well once that guy had too much to drink (which was rather often tbh) he’d get possessed. fun!#the only possession i ever saw was the n-rarity angry ghost who’d just huff and puff in silence with unfocused eyes most of the time #he’d occasionally put on a leather jacket too. but that was like a r-rarity event that didn’t happen that often #my mother had the chance to also witness the mosquito (who tried to barge into my room for fresh blood) and the 姑娘 (self-explanatory)#which is kinda unfair tbh. i wanted to see the ur-rarity ones too :( mostly bc it’d be funny to see a guy i hate act ooc (impure intentions)#oh right. how did we get the dude out of his possession? we just shook his arm really hard. prolly caused some lasting effects but who know #i think he could also just sleep off the possession but idk i was asleep for the ur-rarity incidents.#cant ask the one witness of it bc i dont want to bring back unnecessary flashbacks of [guy we hate]#anyways it’s been years since we moved out from that place and i still want my history textbook back. mostly for the principle of it but—#and so that’s the tangent of the day. i feel weirdly less stressed now thanks witch mona #i do wonder how my grandparents are faring on this 七月 though…#b u t !!!!! tomorrow’s date on the lunar calendar says it’s an auspicious day for wishful activity and starting a new job!!! so… maybe~~~~?#hauauauauauauauuauaaaaaa anyways insane tangent over stream mona’s new album ok bye #oops forgor to disable rbs i hate how easy it is to forget to use this function man

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berryblu-soda · 3 months

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Anyways update i just didnt bother to post earlier:

fr God is good and the whole car crash my parents got into last week was so incredibly mild in terms of injuries!!!! worst was a bruised knee im pretty sure

ALSO-

*taps mic* HUG YOUR FREAKING LOVED ONES OR SO HELP ME!!!!!!!

#ALSO DO NOT READ THE TAGS IF YOURE HERE FOR A GOOD TIME!!!!#ENDED UP VENTING AGHHHHH- (<- amongus ref in 2024???? l+ratio) (no but seriously stay safe; im not sure if i should add a cw???)#no but like the cars themselves?#FOLDED-#ive seen photos of worse ones of course lol (ty internet <3)#but we´re all in agreement that if it had hit anywhere else at that speed it wouldve been BAD Bad-#like; severe injury to the leg at least; drivers door wouldve crumpled; thankfully it hit the tire mostly #our car got what seems to be the lesser damage and theyre still debating if it counts as total loss xd #also oh goshhhh #so i usually go and say goodbye to my dad when hes headed to work; i did it that day as usual; car was already halfway out the driveway #my dog also loves to go and she was already in the car #but my mom (taking my dad to work) said she´d need to stop by the store after dropping dad off; so she handed her back to me #last minute descision-#my dog is a small kinda elderly chihuahua and wouldve been on my mom´s lap when they crashed #no seatbelt for her obviously #she wouldve gotten injured so freaking bad if she was there ):#overall feels like we dodged a life altering accident by a hair #i wasnt even in it and im still shook hahaha #i always go say bye to dad if hes leaving for work no matter if im pissed off or sad or whatever #half out of habit; half bc i know anything could happen at any moment and id rather not have been too proud to say goodbye #dammit im crying now hahaha #saying again; everyones fine!!!!! please remember to hug your loved ones !!!!!!#shut up sheo #but oh gosh too many reminders of death as a constant recently #that happened about a week after a cousin died; i hadnt seen him in forever but his family went to our church growing up; he was my age #it was a dull and distant pain even then to hear the news but it still hurt; i didnt go to the funeral #did go to the one a couple days later tho; for a family member i truly didnt know; it was a car crash i think #a special kind of heartbreak from meeting his mom and seeing his kids running around #now that i realize it; as im writing this; i hadnt stopped to process just about anything hahaha #freaking sobbing at 9 in the morning smh!!!!!

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dappio · 6 months

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Yooo omg did I talk on here about the fact that the author of my first children's book i was working on out of college got arrested last month for having a sexual relationship with a 16 YEAR OLD student and he got cause cause the girl tried to commit suicide when he was fired from the school so he had to tell them and THEN i only found about it a month ltr cause his own wife emailed me telling me he was "going to be unavailable for while" and I am nosy so I googled his name to find his LinkedIn and imagine my shock at being met with multiple articles on his arrest

#It's been a month now and im still shook about #I did get paid and luckliy the book was never published so i dont have the juju on me #besides giving him book updates we didnt talk much so when i read the articles i was like WTF #guess ill use my work from portfolio but oof

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popponn · 10 months

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holy fuck. wait a minute. where is rin. i wanna see rin and bachira

they look so eepy 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

#i want to get mad at nagi but #it's okay loser boy my expectation has been on the floor for u it's okay #reo 😭😭😭😭😭#and hey whoever in merch team who said with ISAGI FOREHEAD with a full chest im going to marry you #actually maybe not marry you i will maybe just #uh idk how about a cake cafe date bbygirl #goood lord man i haven't been this excited since the phantom thief merch and even then it's still feel more sane #the way this collab SHOOK ME AWAKE #now what do i do with this 😭😭😭#babblings

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shiikiyun · 2 months

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I think a lot about the time i posted a sort of... abstract? futa piece with not much explanation and someone reblogged wondering if it represented my personal feelings at the time and hoping i was okay. mostly because it was scary how i got clocked so easily on tumblr dot com, but in general because when i saw it in my notifications it actually helped me snap a little out of it. i dont remember who this was but ill always be thankful for that little caring gesture they probably forgot about haha

#pensive #tbf that drawing had very aggressive lines i think it was easy to tell it was done with Emotion #it was so out of my style too ebdkfbdk #but still. milgram grants me some shield from being too obvious about whats vent art and whats purely fanart #specially w a character i can relate to #it makes it harder for other ppl to distinguish how much of myself im leaving in my art of him #so that moment shook me a little. id even say it kept me grounded for a while at the time #and i felt a little bad DHDKFN #but yeah. crazy. humans are kind and caring huh

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powernappin · 7 months

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the illusionist.

the guild member.

the raven.

what three nights in barovia does to an mfer

#our dm did some improvised tarokka readings for each of our characters and im STILL SHOOK about how incredibly well anders fit him #oleander #oleander sky #dnd oc #curse of strahd oc #shadar kai #bard

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darabeatha · 7 months

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YAOOOOOOHH

#I WAS SHOOK I GOT PUPPETEER BADGE LETSGOOOOOOO #;ooc #ooc #/for context this is about i.dentity v #/AND A.ESOP MY BELOVED!!!!!#/maybe one day i could get an A badge maybe-#i am still mourning the fact i couldnt get the t.rickster skin its so good; my fav for a.esop #/i also still have that old dream of having a badge for n.orton one day just bc he is part of the beloveds club #BUT STILL WOOO #im surprised about p.uppeteer; since he's being picked a lot now in rank #the key here is that i was just faster 😎#as soon as the character pick opens i NYOOM to puppeteer before anyone else can snatch him #and add to that my (unfortunately) long experience with using rescuer charas and BOOM! tanking rescuer moment #;dl #;delete later

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moonssugar · 2 years

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we get the moment blue realizes she likes gansey in and all the hang ups that come with that in agonizing detail BUT i want gansey’s pov of slowly realizing he likes blue in the same agonizing detail because i know this boy had a meltdown and shattered into like a billion pieces and then imploded before slowly putting himself back together like come on. or was it a gradual “this is happening and i can’t stop it” like with him calling blue after the argument with adam and asking her to describe everything just to hear her voice and letting himself slip. like did gansey have a big Oh moment the way blue did we didnt see. he drives blue up to the hill after her second argument with adam and thats when we see him really freak out over his feelings for blue so much that he jumps out the car and runs away from her. before that almost every time he thinks about blue he’s going knock it off, gansey and his thoughts darted toward adam, toward blue, and rabbited away and the boat scene where he’s absolutely admiring her and then telling himself not to ruin things. so ch.51 of the dream thieves is like the moment he can’t not address it, thats his Oh. Oh no moment and he goes right back to trying to repress it by saying “and now we never speak of it again.”

i still want the agonizing detail that went into every single time he ignored how he felt

#someone give me money so i can buy hardback copies of all the books this would so much easier to analyze with annotations #he is sooooo autistic i love his silly ass #richard cambell repressed gansey III #i think its bc his feelings work differently than blue's does. diff upbringing and diff ways of weathering their families #gansey is like if you vacuum sealed your emotions and buried them #blue is like if your emotions is a shook up bottle of soda youre about to drop a mento into #im still reading tdt if we do get this like 2 chapters later its bc i havent read that yet lmao #trc #the raven cycle #the dream theives #blue sargent #gansey #richard gansey #bluesey #im a angst demon bluedam and ronan and blue angst isnt enough for me i need the whole meal

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nabaath-areng · 2 months

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It's been so long since the last time I hallucinated that I forget how jumpy and skittish I get afterwards guhhhh

#im okay the hallucinations werent bad in what i saw and felt but #struggling with sleep and perceiving reality can individually trigger me a loy #so combining them made for a combo that wouldve been devastating hadnt i come this far in recovery #and it helped that friend was there to help me talk through it #but man i still notice how affected i get by it #every little noise every little shadow im jumping and freaking out by reflex over the most minor things #even my sibling walking up without me realizing terrified me in a way it doesnt normally #and again what i saw and perceived during the hallucinations wasnt even bad!!!#i just cant seem to shake off the awful feelings afterwards even when i dont panic about it #i was told by doctor who helped me getting on meds back in the day that like #id likely always be prone to various degrees of relapse during stress #which i noticed a lot #but its been 2 years of relative peace and 1 year since i shook off the last remnants affecting me daily #and even in just that year i somehow forgot just how easy it is to fall back into those fears #but im calm rn and able to sit outside in the dark without feeling even a smidge of fear #so jumping from noises is fine all things considered #the fact that i even got to this point is proof enough #anyway sorry for venting #silvi talks

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shooks-stupid-stuff · 1 year

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i've been redesigning some ocs from an old project of mine, and this is the first one i've gotten a full ref done for

her name is Yuriko and she is definitely a person

#shook arts #oc shiz #yuriko (oc)#she's so funny i love her kcjbkcbk #and im really happy with her design. full transparency she was HEAVILY inspired by a character i really like and her old design made that.#SO obvious-#so im glad i was able to make her look like her own character while still keeping some nods to the character she was inspired by lol #but anyways. the funny!#next one i post will prooobably be her best friend? well. who SHE says is her best friend atleast cjnbcjhv-#got a few other things to work on first tho :]#also yeah dw about the second one lmao #it's just a joke drawing ive been meaning to finish for like a year but never did so. there's no time like after redesigning her!

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avatardoggo · 1 year

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soooo i was right 🫠😐🫥 the Friend like likes me and it seems e v e r y o n e around me has known sINCE FEBRUARY

#SO 👏🏾 let’s just let it be known that i’m an Obviously Silly Clown so no one needs to tel me that ik already so i already told y’all how he #said he needed to Talk to me and i was planning on avoiding him but my friends said not to bc it’s not the Adult Thing To Do and he is my #friend and i care about him so it wouldn’t be nice so i didn’t me and my roommate went to dairy queen with him after i finished braiding her #hair so we were getting out the car to go get ready for bible study at church but then he’s all like ‘VK i need to talk to you can you pleas #stay?’ and i was like KAJDJDJFJFJJD NO but on the outside i was such a Normal Girl and was like sure :)) so we’re in the parking lot and i l #left the door open bc i didn’t want to feel claustrophobic but i lied 🤥 and said it was hot so he starts out all like sorry i made you anxio #us by prolonging this talk and i was like lol no it’s fine i was busy with exams and stuff and he just kinda gets quiet and he was like sooo #i like you and i’m like #🤔😃🫠😶🫥😧 processing #and then i was like ok elaborate and he’s like i have feelings for you so i’m SHOOK BC WOWIE ppl aren’t cowards like me cause i could never #and i say well thanks for telling me and i think you’re really brave for that but i’m sorry i don’t feel the same way but i still want to be #friends but if you need space then it’s fine as well and he’s like ya i didn’t expect anything from you i just didn’t want to regret not #saying anything so i was ABOUT TO CRY BC I HAD TO REJECT HIM BC I REALLY DONT HAVE THOSE FEELJNGS FOR HIM so i left and went home and my <3 #almost exploded from my chest i was on the verge of a panic attack and i told my roommate and she was LAUGHING BC SHES SUSPECTED HES LIKED #ME SINCE FEBRUARY when he paid for my pizza and aPpArEnTlY hOw He LoOkS aT mE 🙄 WHATEVER #AND THEN I TOLD MY SECOND ROOMMATE AND SHES LIKE O YA IM NOT SURPRISED #so i’m just an oblivious silly goose who doesn’t USE HER BRAIN like kajdjdjhddjd and and now i’m thinking of the things i’ve done that made #him think i like him too like i baker him a pie for his birthday and i just feel silly and need advice if anyone has any but if not it’s fin #just an update on my life if you’re interested #vk overshares in the tags

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slythereen · 11 months

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why it’s always Lestappen vs everyone?like you want tell me v*rsainz is more popular than lestappen bc response for that poll….yeah we lost in every way

tbh i think it’s a combo of ppl who don’t like max and people who see their fave driver as being threatened by charles 😅 (i mean that from a marketing/racing sense. like. not that they feel threatened by him in terms of max’s affections) (like, guys, we’re not saying lando is a shit driver or something because we think lestappen are also good friends… be serious)

listen….i don’t mean to cause discourse…….but the streets mentioned a lot of lestappies were blocked by some of those poll makers and couldn’t vote 😳 im not saying fixed BUT…

#i don’t like losing #i take this personally #im genuinely shook versainz has so many shooters #like yeah that hug was cute #and they were teammates #got along despite the political bloodbath #but ????#they don’t really….. still vibe like that?#anyway i will not argue w ppl about their preferred besties but i will unapologetically think to myself lestappen is superior #*oracles #sorry not to call out lando fans like that #it was just the most recent one I saw #lando is valid and has rights

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