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elis-blawg222 · 1 day ago

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November 8 - Friday

Whew! Caught up at last!! (took me long enough)

Today was actually pretty good. I called Angel before school which made me really happy!! (I love him sm ill sob rn actually). My class wasn't toooo bad. The teacher talked sooo much ugh, but I drew the whole time so it was fine. I made my oc thinnn n pretty, love him. Also we had to go around the room and talk to people for like 30 minutes. 30. (did yk you have 30 minutes??)

It was so nerve wracking, especially because I was unprepared lol. I bet I looked like such a total weirdo with the lack of eye contact I was making, but at the time I was just trying not to break a nervous sweat LMAO.

Then, after my class I went to the library (on call w/Ange) and did an assignment. I went home afterwards because my phone was gonna die, and I needed my charger.

After a bit at home, I went to my next class, and I had a test in this one. It went good I think! We studied beforehand which I'm really grateful for.

We had a break in this class, so I went to walk around for a minute, and during this my mom texted me with:

"Eli

What did u eat today"

...

nothing. So, I said "I had some chicken nuggetss after my class hehe"

to which she responded "No fries no pop. How many nuggets"

GURL. So i was like "I did get some fries lol? and i got 10 why?"

and she just CONVENIENTLY NEVER RESPONDED. UGH.

(but wait theres more.)

After my class ended I went home and got ready for work. I was otp w/Angel (because seriously when am I not?) and he was playing minecraft. It was so peaceful and entertaining to watch and listen to him play- I loved every bit of it. Then, we talked about how we should play together (I ltrly will do anything to idc).

Work was actually ehh, not toooo bad. My dad and friend and her mom stopped by which was nice, and also my hairdresser LOL. They both tipped really well (obviously my dad did but yk).

I went home after what felt like one billion years, I was so so so happy. When I got home I just said a few things about my day like I usually do, and made sure to slip in the fact that I got a free meal at work. Which isn't wrong, I did, but I didn't get anything. I actually am just gonna let my friend get something tomorrow. but they don't have to know all that shhhhhhhh.

Then my mom stopped in front of me and was like what did you eat? and so i repeated myself bc no one listens to me <3

(I told her fried chicken tenders, fries, mac and cheese for context, a very 'me' meal tbh or at least it was)

Then, she was like "how many chicken tenders?" "no drink?" "did you finish it? all of it?" "so then you ate 2 full meals today?"

oh. my god. like. genuinely.

why. is. she. interrogating. me. pls. fucking. leave. me. alone. IM GENUINELY MORTIFIED AND HONESTLY IM SO AGGRIVATED. LET ME STARVE IN PEACE HOLY FUCK.

I tried to act like a normal person and be like ??? why are you interrogating me? BC WHY ARE YOU (as if I'm not literally starving myself)

She was just like "because I need to make sure you're getting nutrients." ok girl.

Then, I went to my room and she went to bed. I cleaned my room a bit and did a homework assignment, so I'm pretty proud of myself.

Also if you couldn't tell by now I fasted today. I was gonna either 48 hr fast or do 2 24 hr fasts back to back, but I think I'm just gonna do around 36 hrs. I wanna eat in front of my mom tomorrow so maybe she'll start leaving me alone (I seriously doubt it).

It just gets really frustrating when every meal I have she thinks isn't enough, even when I'm genuinely full. I can't eat like I used to like I physically cannot, she has to get that.

Anywho, I was thinking of making some cucumber boats tomorrow, I think it'll be fun.

Total Steps: 6.7k

Look at me meeting my step goal for once. I'm gonna start really making an effort at meeting it!

'Til tomorrow :)

(P.S. actually getting activity on these makes me so nervous but haiii)

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nanaslutt · 3 days ago

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love from uu guys!! >.<

1) awww tysm!! perv geto was the first “series” i posted that really blew up, i constantly go back and look at all the notes and it’s genuinely mind blowing. ty for supporting me <3

2) i lob u too pookie!! hugging u thought the phone rn

3) hiii!! thank you so much! i don’t mind spam liking at all, im happy to see it, it means people are enjoying my work and thats exactly what i want ^.^ as for uraume works, i honestly have no idea, if i do i might have one? i do plan on writing some in the future though <3

4) of course ml, thank you so much

5) EEEHEHEHEHEH THANK YOU!!

6) i love u too pookie!

7) as finals creep up it’s get worse and worse, but we got this!! love u pookie

8) thank you so much!! this was sent waaaay before i ended up abolishing my schedule, but i have been taking a lot of time to myself to relax :)

9) thank you bae!! <3 take care of yourself

#.love

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sweetronancer · 8 months ago

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ion wanna do this anymore bro

#im trying so hard not to cry over this stupid little crush #like i want her to look at me the way i look at her but i dont wanna hurt her or myself #and im really working on myself rn and like #im doing pretty good but i like cant do this #i hate liking girls i actually cant do this

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deoidesign · 2 months ago

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My comic is so pretty...

The hiatus is letting me take a little extra time on these episodes, and I'm definitely putting it to good use!!!

#almost done with my 8th episode... which will give me. two weeks. of buffer...#id really like at LEAST a month... but to be more comfortable id like two #which means 2-6 more episodes before I come back!#I've got about 7 weeks so its possible. but i do still have to finish book 4 #so much to do ..........#I decided for my next comic im doing 3 updates a month.#having 10 days instead of 7 to make an episode is such a huge huge huge difference...#difference in quality and in my health!#anyways the comic is really pretty im really happy with the work im doing rn #the environments especially. im getting to spend a nice amount of time on them and theyre turning out so nicely #its nice to be able to write with a lot of different environments and not have to redo panels when I get to them cause of time #cause every time theres a wild angle? you need a new background...#so sometimes. often actually. there just isnt the time to make the backgrounds for those and i have to make them more flat...#which is fine. it doesnt really affect anything narratively. but. idk. it's kinda sad right?#anyways yeah! 10 days will be much better.#36 episodes a year is about what ive been uploading with my hiatuses on the weekly schedule anyways!#so might as well cut out that super stressful middleman and just commit to that #52 a year is just such a huge difference and i have to accept its not possible to me #i will hurt myself trying to do that. and i want to make comics my whole life!#so i cant push myself that hard now and sacrifice my future. we're gonna go slower after this...#anyways yeah cant wait to come back but also time. if I could get an extra week like a secret one just for me #where theres no chores no nothin just me and my work #thatd be great! so go ahead and do what you gotta do to give me a little pocket dimension #me: ugh i want to return right now...#the more logical me: NO we need the time to finish everything!!!!!! NOT right now!!!!#time and time again #ttawebcomic #comic panels #hiatus stuff #adam and steve

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bunnieswithknives · 2 months ago

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So, was that tag mentioning "fairy deer lycanthropy" /j or /srs ?

#Maybe #I dont know #Im thinking about it #I want you to know every time im like 'ooooh I have this idea im not going to do it though' I am looking at my audience with big beady eyes #Mostly I do that to gauge interest because if I really didnt want to do it I wouldnt bring it up #almost no one has said anything about it but I am in fact insane about bodyhorror #Id have to figure out the logistics tho and I think thats my biggest roadblock rn #I have to make a design also I have to come up with a justification for how the fuck fairy lycanthropy works #because I am absolutely not making it canon that fairy bites just do that #maybe its partially somatic #I have no idea if thats the word im looking for #like he gets the idea in his head that itll happen and because of the magic in his blood he accidentally curses himself #that would be so beautiful #deep down he knows hes a monster and he starts externalizing that...#oh god im talking myself into it #fop nature au

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welcometogrouchland · 5 months ago

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(on my hands and knees begging tumblr to not mutilate the quality of this drawing 😭) anyway, coming out as a secret marvel fan to announce that i really enjoyed the recently she-hulk run w/ Jen and her boytoy and am sad to see them go. Jack pls dont disappear into the ether i just got attached to you (ID in alt)

#marvel comics #sensational she hulk #sensational she hulk 2023 #she hulk #jennifer walters #jack of hearts #jack hart #im typing thrse tags on an ipad rn (hell) so im going to be brief for once but yeah i reslly enjoyed this series #it was a sweet slice of life breath of fresh air and i found myself really invested in the relationship between jen and jack #Lowkey tempted to hop onto avengers just to keep up w jen #maybe- maybe not. We’ll see! Either way thse two are cute lol #this came together surprisingly quick for his detailed it is (by my standards lmao) and that makes me #nervous. Mainly #theres bits that r off but overall i like it #tried to fit lettering in but it didnt work lol #anyway #i know the authors on tumblr. Rainbow rowell if you somehow find this hire me /j #i dont think thats how it works since theyre a writer and not an editor lol #ANYWAY I REALLY NEED TO SLEEP #goodnight to all 8 ppl who will reblog this #mine

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astrum99 · 9 months ago

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Do you think bugs fall in love?

Their small bodies host even tinier brains. Built to crawl through soil and rocks bigger than itself. Running on a simple software bouncing between eat, sleep, fight, flight, and copulate.

V1 is smarter than a bug. It must be. It’s a war machine, so it must be. Its programming is complex enough to fry several motherboards; the internals are heated from constant, unrelenting processing needs. If it updates its optical data intake to any greater degree than these rough, messy polygons, it’d surely perish from the overwhelming information.

V1 is built to kill first, survive second. To be fair, survival would ensure more killing, so it’d be more effective. Moving through the battlefield, culling lives, drawing blood. Perfectly aligned with its programmed objectives, then.

Gabriel is smarter than a bug. He must be. He’s an angel, so he must be. He’s one of the best soldiers in the heavenly realm. Armour and swords glistened with pride and justice. He sees all. He judges all. His loyalty and perfect track record have earned him a high rank within the order. Leaving behind the creaturely "it". His light burns hot and bright within his constitution.

Gabriel is built as a messenger of the Father, then a judge of Hell. To be fair, the role of a judge was assigned to him by the council, so he supposes that his placement can be summed up as the bearer of the divine authority to bring right to all other creatures. Perfectly aligned, then.

Bugs… Well, they’re the same. I suppose. Small beings. Running pre-programmed orders derived from centuries of evolution: eat, sleep, fight, flight, and copulate. No role. No responsibilities.

Bugs are built naturally and fully, unlike humankind; but formed and ready to go within seconds from their births, like machines and angels.

So. Do they live?

When the machine and the angel escape their chains, do they see themselves in bugs?

Bugs are born to live, temporarily, fleetingly, yet live nonetheless. Do they, then, deserve to live, freeing and meaninglessly. No role. No responsibilities.

So. Do bugs love?

Do they learn that they can go beyond their basic structures? Do they see their own reflection in each other’s compound eyes? Do they recognize each other’s bodies, scents, heat? Do they feel the desire for closeness?

To flutter wings like a dance of waltz. To brush antennae like butterfly kisses. To greet and caress and lie next to each other near their death.

To move through the sky in battle, in passion. To clash swords and fists and bullets. To greet and caress and lie next to each other near their death.

The same cells in the same blood coursing beneath the same suit of exoskeletons.

Machine, angel, bug. Boiled down to the barest essence of existence; crisp simplicity.

To live, to love.

#(im thinking abt how angels have a default pronoun of it/its and went insane – they’re so bugs; like machine)#v1 ultrakill #ultrakill #gabv1el #gabriel ultrakill #az thoughts #also if this flops im flinging myself into the sun #is this any good; is it; is it <- desperate #im just really tired rn i think; its fine #wrote between lectures; thought abt queueing but whatever its fine #got like 4 group projects and a giant assignment and no free time during the last weekend i am fine i am fine i am fine #its fine for me to write Things instead of working on stuff this is destressing its fine #i need to be spun in a washing machine and left on a hanger to dry for approximately 12 hours and then ironed for way too long #<- going insane but in a bad way #someone pls take me out (date or murder; surprise me)

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puppyeared · 1 month ago

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AND I MET THE CHANGE GOD TOO. OKAY. COOL OKAY

#I WASNT EVEN MEANING TO SO I ACCIDENTALLY SKIPPED THE DIALOGUE BEFORE I KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENING FUCK #ill go and find it later if only to give myself peace of mind. BUT WOW. WHAT THE FUCK #my original plan was to 1) work my way to the king and talk to him 2) doom myself and take everyone down with me 3) loop back to floor 3 #so i can visit the observatory and scrounge for any lore. although since i got killed that run siffrin asked the king to kill him first #which was intereresting. but i decided to have all doors unlocked that time around so i can just get the starcrest and go #but for some reason it wasnt working so i went to get the keyknife since i was already there and completely forgot i already had it #from the previous loop and THATS what triggered it. IT WAS FUNNY BUT ALSO SCARY BUT ALSO I THINK I GET WHAT THEY MEAN #about siffrin going back without actually changing. going along with a script even if his feelings on things change #the same way he has his own small rituals like the carving thing and does it for constancy. reassurance or safety even #and the times when he breaks script and ends horribly like the sadness attacking thing and bonnie yelling at him cause him to loop #to avoid it. although i cant really say anything bc id probably do the same thing. maybe not for the same reasons since im cruel #and make him do the worst to see what will happen since i put curiosity over rejection sensitivity as an observer and player but well.#i feel wrongfooted bringing it up since i dont have it myself but i have to wonder if this kind of leans into ocd tendencies.. i remember #reading something about how ocd is fuelled by fear. and things like counting and rituals are kind of used to cope with that?#if anyone knows anything more or talked abt it already id be really interested in hearing it bc im almost sure im not #the first to come to this conclusion. but i simply dont know enough nor have the confidence to broach the topic rn esp with how often #misconceptions around ocd get casually passed around so its hard for me to know what is and isnt a baseless assumption #puppy plays isat #in stars and time #isat #playthru #isat spoilers #in stars and time spoilers #isat act 3 spoilers #change god #WHAT WAS THAT WITH WEARING LOOPS FACE THOUGH WHAT THE FUCKKK

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sweetvalentinescandy · 3 months ago

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struggled a lot with tweeks pose unfortunately. love how kenny turned out!! if only it was their week but its NOT!!!

#TweekWeek2024 #hohoho!!!! HOHOHO!!!!#it begins!!!!!#tweek tweak #kenny mccormick #south park #sp twenny #twenny #tweek x kenny #when i saw this prompt like 2 months ago i grinned SO WIDE #I SMIRKED AT THE 4TH WALL COMICALLY #got some stuff planned for this week #its kinda not a very cool week for me personal lore wise #but im hoping tweek week can help with that #ofc…. i have some personal art planned……#smirking #lets just say #im forever a crazy ex girlfriend #i LOVE being a crazy ex girlfriend #but this was fun to draw #i was gigglin and shit #mu anatomy is actually visibly improving kinda???#might share some sketchbook doodles ive been doing eventually.. donf count on it #rrying SOOO hard to make this one project work rn #not gonna reveal anything because i dont really want to pressure myself into doin it #itll come natural #but taylor swifts music has been a huge inspo lately #been hyperfixating a LOT on hermitcraft/life lately. thats where ive been. practicing and binging hc #been happy though!!! doing SO much better mentally!!!! <3333 #thats the life update i shuppose

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puhpandas · 20 days ago

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as someone who isnt super excited for sotm for certain reasons I am really glad that like. it's clear that since ruin theyve been setting up for carnival and sotm IS carnival. so now that carnival is finally coming out, afterwards theyll be moving on to other plotlines since the main villain stuff is sorted out

I'm just rlly happy to finally see a clear direction for how the story is gonna be playing out with like "okay these games were leading up to this so after this will be open possibilites" instead of like. absolutely no info about each upcoming game and being left guessing before it releases and just having to wait and see what's in it and if anything you're looking forward to will be in it

it feels like they have a plan and a solid direction for what they're trying to do and after carnival releases thatll be all that buildup coming to fruition. & we already know from the Scott interview that theres another release 'beyond sotm' that's 'super exciting' so maybe thatll be focusing on another big currently untouched (which is basically all of them) plotline, or even the big campaign game that dawko has been calling security breach 2

#even if i dislike how theyve been handling this whole mimic cassies dad factory mapbot bonnie bully stuff #the past like 2 releases 3 after sotm #after watching johns theory video it really does feel like stuff was more purposeful with thought put into it when u plug in cassies dad #even if the plot of him being behind mxes and trapping mimic is pushing other more important characters aside #its probably what happened and accepting that makes the story at least seem more thought out #it did make me feel better about it bc like. it at least feels like theyre cooking #like what theyre working on DOES have a direction and a plan and it isnt just random stuff like how it felt when hw2 came out #i might still think that the stuff theyve been doing the past few releases is boring af and uninteresting #compared to earlier concepts like focusing on vanny and the possession aspects and sentient glamrocks #(we could see more of it with freddy if theyd let him come back ever)#but like. at least it has thought put into it and feels like theyre actually trying to set shit up for something #like sotm is an ORIGIN #the tagline was 'sometimes you have to understand the past to see the future'#at the end of the day sotm is a setup for a campaign thatll take place in present day anf #even if its taking ten thousand years to get there im excited for it #aka its taken a long time to tell this story setup of cassies dad and mimic and shit and it might be boring for some people #(me)#but at the end of the day its meant to be setup explaining the past of why mimic exists (even if that's already in tbe books)#so after we 'understand' it we can get back to present day #and focus on its current victims vanessa gregory cassie etc #cassies dad is 100% dead if hw2s protag is him so he woukdnt be relevant anymore. just another character thing to serve cassie #im just saying like after sotm its wide open for getting back to the plot #and i think its actually right to say that bc like all of this has been setup. if hw2 protag is cassies dad its a prequel to ruin #so rn ruin is the most recent game in the timeline. meaning the next game that takes place in current tjme will focus on the current mains #Gregory cassie vanessa #sorry for fnaf plot posting again ive been thinking about it a lot the past few days #thought id balance some negative ive posted with a positive since im feeling better about it myself :)#one day we're gonna be so back and its gonna be great #its just gonna be a long annoying wait lmao #thoughts

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betweenblackberrybranches · 2 years ago

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Here is a concept "painted on Sun" just a cutie

Yea im a bit absent rn i just feel a lil overwhelmed and not so good so i will be talking and interacting less for a while... dw about me tho its all fine

#my art #daycare attendant #sundrop #he looks like a well loved barbie #just painted all over with sharpie #i think i actually bourned myself out a lil bit when i started this blog #i think im just really sensetive and overestimated how much this would take out of me #also this is not a hiatus announcemebt or anything im not going anywhere #i just hope all my moots know i love them and i still think they are super cool eventhough rn i only have energy to like stuff most days #i say all this after working on the next automaton update all day so thats probably coming tomorrow or the day after

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hella1975 · 1 year ago

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i need to read more books and annotate in the margins i need to write more i need to buy jeans that fit me i need to eat more fruit i need to buy good quality headphones i need to get a skincare routine i need to talk to my friends more i need to wash my hair i need to stop treating this inhabitation as a curse. i am tired of punishing the body that has fought me for survival every day for years. i deserve little treats as regularly as possible !!

#more money would also be good but! we are working on it <3 this is a team effort im bored of being in a perpetual bar fight with myself #like sorry i havent answered my texts in months or barely sustain personal hygeine but that bitch (points at mirror) chucked a drink at me #it's okay tho we are in our enemies to lovers arc #just had a really vivid sudden 'i am in this body' moment and let me TELL you when you spend 90% of the time feeling a very #set seperation between your emotional self and physical self that is INCREDIBLY fucking jarring lmao. like oh this is me #the freckles on my fingers are just as much me as my years long loyalty to specifically prawn cocktail pringles. okay #that's cool. cool cool cool that's so cool so everything that's happened to me physically is still me okay cool #coooool cool cool. super cool btw. very angry for myself rn which never happens i normally just get angry at myself #LIKE THIS IS MY BODY! WHY DO I HAVE TO DRINK IT INTO BED AND HURT IT FOR NO REASON! WHY DO I LET PEOPLE GET AWAY WITH SO MUCH!#'i'll take care of you it's rotten work especially to me especially if it's you i'll do it but christ alive' except it's me and my body #like yeah im not happy about it bossman but we're stuck together. let's get you some nice clothes

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bunnyboy-juice · 20 days ago

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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner