#and if u saw this n wanna do it do it !“!
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#pls u tell me maxs most embarrassing moment in f1 had something to do with daniel 😭 i didn't know about this#19 yo max saw the super cool old guy pit n thought to himself i wanna do that too 🤩#maxiel
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i bite at the hand that feeds me.
#ts4#the sims 4#simblr#ts4 render#ts4 edit#show us your sims#deja senti: edits#dahlia#something quick to try out this way of vhs-ifying things i saw on twitter!#links the entirety of possibly in michigan#dahlias like eros do u wanna come over n watch a movie<3 and eros is like hell yes expecting just to get pussy#and she turns this on LMAO#hes like hm why my dick still hord?
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ok bro so i don't know how to make this post SDJFHSH and say hi hello i missed everyone without being awkward and facing cricket noises since it's been over a year since i’ve logged in LMFAO and ppl still following r gonna be like ??? but .... ASKDUSDL HELLO!!!!! 🙂↕️ to everyone that is still here ... <3
I MISSED YA'LL SM OMG ;---; i hope some of you still remember me so this won’t be too awkward 🙂↕️🙏
on that note!!!! i have returned because i have really bad gojo and isagi brainrot since rewatching/rereading jjk + getting into bllk
+ i have so many fics i have completed that i want to post !!! i have been cooking in isolation and after much needed self-growth and love in writing <3 ;v; (gojo, isagi, and nanami ones mostly lmaoo AND ALSO A SUKUNA SERIES I WANT TO POST) AND IDK WHAT TO POST FIRST LOL
also to the mutuals (that remain... <3) please do not be alarmed if u see me in ur notifs reblogging fics for my current faves and yapping in ur tags 🙂↔️ like in the next few days LMFAO i have been deprived of reading good fic for soooo long bruh and now im like. I NEED TO READ FOR GOJO AND ISAGI SO BAD…. i missed fic so bad...
would ya'll be chill if i posted writing out of the blue here lmao and changed my username ??... it wouldn't be too awkward ?? 🙂↔️ (for the username i will change it in a few days despite my impatience so i give everybody like a chance to get used to me being on their dash so it won't be too alarming LMAOO)
#i am way too lazy to make a new blog from scratch lol#idk how to post its been so long KSJDFHS (ALSO WHY IS TUMBLR SO SKINNY NOW LIKE THE DASH IS SO NARROW IM LIKE CONFUSED LMFAOO???)#also tf r community labels what is this... saw a notif on a dumb shitpost of mine and it is labeled?? as that KJHDSF idk what that means#so much as happened in the past year idek where to start but i am here to stay if u will have me ^_^ <3#HELP IM BEING SO AWKWARD THIS WILL GO AWAY THE MORE I POST I JUST. whew getting this post out into the dash is nerve wracking bro lmfaoo#over a year completely away from tumblr was strange cuz idk how to behave LOL#i do wanna post here so i just wanted to make this post in advance and like greet everyone and interact w everybody so its not too-#-awkward once i start posting writing and reblogging n such LMAOO#and also posting blog maintenance stuff :3#KSJDHF LETS RIP THE BANDAID OFF AS THEY SAY#i am so excited !!!!!#i thought about some of u guys while being away from the app and just kjshdf i hope some of u r still here ;___;#i've also figured my interests n stuff out a lot this past year...#found out im bi gender also so. weeee ...
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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ppl make a good point when they say making Damian pale isn’t whitewashing. i just get annoyed when ppl make him a Brucie junior with blue eyes and a button nose and such. he IS half white so it’s not crazy for him to be pale or take after his dad a bit, but i think it’s CRIMINAL when ppl give him blue eyes or dont a LEAST draw him with a wicked ass, cool ass BREATHTAKING nose. as long as y’all get those eyes and nose right i’ll leave u alone
#that’s the bare minimum for me#i DO love the dark skinned damian designs AND he’s still valid if he’s on the paler side#i saw someone talking ab this and i was like ‘ur so right babe’#i just HATE when ppl erase his arabic features#ik dc wanna make him mini bruce BUT i wanna make him mini talia#and if they can’t gimme that the LEAST they can do is give him brown/green eyes and at least SOME of his mothers features#also there’s a criminal lack of acknowledgment of his chinese heritage#he’s 25% chinese and arabic#so i wanna see some of that too in his AND talias designs#also the person pointed out the ‘damien’ vs. ‘damian’ spelling and i was like 🫢 bc i DID NOT know that and it was rlly educational#so n e ways stop whitewashing damian by FIRST spelling his name right#damian wayne#damian al ghul#talia al ghul#stop white washing damian#i’m obsessed with interesting noses if u couldn’t tell
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10 Fandoms 10 Characters 10 Tags
tagged by @velnat004 thank you I missed being tagged to stuff т ̫ т♡
you know...I won't name them.you know them I know them.everyone and their mother knows them (..Or not...I'll tag them)
Varied? XD okay... tagging @ice-6caydesqueen @kinokochouchou @tolltale @aylaaescar @volchitsa-of-winterfell @wifestre @pixilicious @vihola @baepsrae @iorwethh @milkdrawsthings @kimmkitsuragi ✧*。 ofc u don't have to do it if u don't wanna
#xx#and if u saw this n wanna do it do it !“!#honestly i forget to tag a lot of blogs...#dragon age#doctor who#killing eve#mass effect#legend of drizzt#swtor#game of thrones#demonheart#kotor 2#black lagoon
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dude i have a sims 4 save of cove and my version of my mc cuz i like to self indulge 🤷🏾 AND EVERYTIME I LOAD UP THE GAME MY MC IS PREGNANT AND I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE💀 SHES ON HER 3RD KID RN💀
LMAOOO OMFG IM SO GLAD YOU BROUGHT UP SIMS BC MY SIM GOT PREGNANT BACK TO BACK....
so I bought growing together right?!?! made a new save w cove and my sim. (I have an old save w cove n my Sim but the kids on that save is alrdy grown. also I deleted all my cc n didn't wanna deal w makeover-ing 10+ sims)
anyway. had a kid right... all is good. I'm happy enough right.... well. I have risky woohoo. n i.... just forgot?!?! so when they woohooed to get their Fun need up. I clicked on the toilet n it said THROW UP.
MY SIM JUST HAD A BABY. THROW UP WHY? FOR WHAT.... I take a test. PREGANT. AGAIN.... LIKE LITERALLY DAY AFTER BIRTHINF THE FIRST KID
I check with mc command center.... ITS TWINS !!!!!
SO RIGHT NOW. I HAVE 3 INFANTS IN MY GAME. I HAVE RESORTED TO CHEATING THEIR NEEDS BC COVE N MY SIM ALMOST PISSED THEMSELVES 3 TIMES EACH. PASSED OUT SEVERAL TIMES.
YA FEED ONE KID, ANOTHER NEEDS FEEDINF. CHANGE ONE DIAPER. ANOTHER SHITS THEMSELVES.
so yeah... I've been cheating.
AND THEN THE MOMS AND LIZ CAME OVER RIGHT. TO HELP WITH BABY #1. BUT THE ONLY HELP THEY EXTENDED. WAS TO THEMSELVES TO MY FUCKING REFRIGERATOR WHERE THEY THEN HELPED THEMSELVES TO MY FOOD. THEY DIDNT COOK SHIT.... JUST GOT IN MY WAY AND ATE MY FOOD 😭😭😭😭😭😭
edit: help not me rambling even MORE in the tags....
#can u tell ive been waitinf to talk abt this LMAO#i wasnt sure if i should post screenshots n shit on here but man. theres been STUFF going on#AND THEN APPARENTLY COVE FLIRTED W MIRANDA AND LEE'S MOM???? OR VICE VERSA???? SO I HAD CHEAT THAT BAR AWAY???#AND THEN I WENT TO THE ROMANCE FESTIVAL WITH TERRY MIRANDA DEREK N OFC COVE + MY SIM#AND IG MY SIM OR SOMEONE FLIRTED WITH MY SIM THEN COVE WAS MAD BC I “CHEATED ON HIM” N SO I HAD TO CHEAT THAT AWAY#i also cheated some sentiments#i added a rejection sentiment to derek bc yk how derek canonly likes MC in step 2 n then i added a guilty sentiment to my sim#BUT BEFORE I DID THAT. RIGHT. I DIDNT WANNA LOOK UP THE CHEAT TO ADD SENTIMENTS SO I WAS TRYNA DO IT NATURALLY. LIKE DO SMTH. ANYTHING.#so i had derek profess his love to my sim n then cove SAW IT. AND GOT MAD. AND THE GAME WAS LIKE “WANNA ADD THE JEALOUSY TRAIT?!?” AND I WAS#LIKE “/HUH/.....”#ALSO. APPARENTLY MA HAS SOME BEEF WITH NANCY LANDGRAB? AND SHES FRIENDS WITH JUDITH WARD????#ALSO JUDITH WARD IS FUCKING PREGNA T MY DON LOTHARIO IN MY SAVE. WHAT THE FUCK
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didnt even touch on the sandra lynn stuff int he tags of the last post bcos if i talk about her im liable to explode. get behind me, middle-aged divorced woman proficient in archery
#wasnt around for sy as it aired but ive seen the remnants of the liveblogging and its so foul#the genuine misogyny....#saw someone claim gilear was a better parent than her and i had to turn off my computer#i know we all love gilear and hes been tbh redeemed by comedy where sandra lynn doesnt get that#but like. be serious.#that tonal shift in difference of how gilear and sandra lynn are received is wicked interesting to me#and like pre-emptive disclaimer this isnt Gilear Problematic I Want Discourse. im just thinkin thoughts here#the way fy episode 1 gilear actively left his wife n daughter and calls her a demon even if he doesnt mean it that way#but then fig/emily takes an interest in him and from there hes a radically different character whos just kind of. pathetic.#im hesitant to call it flanderization because initial gilear only got like 10 minutes of screentime before wet cat gilear took the stage#but like. in ep1 both faeth parents are shown as equally flawed and on an even narrative playing field#which is then upset as fig latches onto gilear as a comedic force and hes not as much 'dad with tense relationship to daughter he disowned'#as 'guy the pcs do bits with'. esp in fy he doesnt do much but let fig live in his apartment sometimes#(and if u rlly wanna analyse u could say something abt her basically taking care of him instead of the other way around)#this then rlly impacts sandra lynn! bcos now fig has One tense parental relationship to rest all her angst on#and where gilear gets bits. sandra lynn really doesnt get much spotlight until the prison sequence#and the lack of focus on sandra lynn Is lampshaded in-universe and i like the resolution#and then u get to sy where sandra lynn gets as much spotlight as gilear but she doesnt have his comedic shield#so instead she has the dramatic spotlight and both the story and the characters are weirdly obsessed w her sex life#and yeah i know im an aro autist maybe i take cheating a bit lightly. but its in the same category as the 'zelda is mad at gorgug' shit#shes made a spectacle but because shes not gilear and society has notions about sex she gets judged for it#like something abt gilear disowning fig getting dropped while sandra lynn is scrutinised so much rlly rubs me the wrong way#she is FLAWED that is what THE JAIL EP WAS ABOUT!!!#she is TRYING arguably more than GILEAR but she doesnt have the absolution of rule of funny to fall back on#i go insane. i go insane#post not mentioning jy bcos i havent seen it. once again middle-aged divorced women proficient in archery get behind me ill protect u
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Poor Form
✧ Nebarra x human!LDB, ft. Xelzaz & Khash ✧ Fluff, maybe angst (if you squint), slow-burn with tension; 2k+ word count ✧ Mentions of blood, (poorly written) fantasy violence ♫ "Ritual" - AWAY, Echos ✒ @dalishthunder come take responsibility for this
It was the grey hour when you woke, the quiet lull between full night and the oncoming dawn. From where you lay in the tent, the only sounds you could hear were the steady breaths of your companions, the breeze rustling by outside, and the lone call of a bird, faint and dim in the distance.
Slowly, you sat up, grimacing at your sore neck and shoulders – though you had long since grown accustomed to sleeping on the ground, that didn't mean you, or your body, appreciated it. You'd have to look into getting some bed cots instead. Until then, though...
At least we stay warm through the night. The oiled leather tent kept out most of the wind, and the beasts you'd felled along the journey had long since become the bedding everyone slept on.
A sudden snore drew your attention to where Khash lay, bundled in her sleeping bag beside you, red eyes shut tight and jaw slightly parted, her sharp little teeth on display. Across from her was Xelzaz, sleeping quietly on his side with his back turned towards you; you could just make out the lump of his tail beneath the blankets. And next to him...
...was an empty bed roll, the fur still fluffed, apparently untouched through the night.
Frowning, you pushed back the blankets, habitually reaching for your sword as you rose – just in case, always just in case – and, taking care not to wake Khash, crawled quietly out of the tent.
The morning had teeth. You felt it the moment you stepped outside, the cold biting into your bare arms, gnawing through the fabric of your tunic and raising goosebumps across your skin. Your breath plumed white amidst the grey, and the dirt underfoot was cold and hard; not even the morning dew had loosened it. You found yourself wanting retreat back into the tent and burrow under your furs once more, pulling them all the way over your head and falling asleep beneath their warmth. Any other morning, you might have done just that. But...
The empty, untouched bedroll.
You squinted into the mist, eyes searching, searching... there. A figure, seated on a rock several metres away, smudged and blurred in the gloom, but glinting a familiar gold.
As you lowered your sword, a sigh slipped from your lips, drawn from some strange mix of frustration, concern, and relief.
"...How long have you been out here, Nebarra?"
"Morning to you too, guar-face," the elf drawled, and though he didn't rise, his helmeted head turned towards you. A thin layer of condensation covered the metal, droplets falling at his movement; his bangs, escaping through the visor, were damp and plastered to his helm. "And all night, to answer your question. Somebody has to keep watch."
"Obviously. But you volunteered for the first shift last night." Frowning, you looked him up and down, not bothering to mask your concerned displeasure. "Why didn't you wake me or Xelzaz? We could have relieved you. We were supposed to relieve you."
"Oh yes, a human and a lizard! I'm certain I'd feel very safe with you two on watch. Your species' eyesight is so much better than an Altmer's, after all."
Your frown deepened, brow furrowing as you stared him down. It was too early in the morning for his snark.
Wordlessly, you brought up your sword and levelled it at his throat. "I can see that gap in your armor just fine. I could kill you right now – and the same goes for whatever may have come up on us in the night."
Nebarra gave a disdainful snort, gloved hand clamping down on your blade and giving a sharp tug. Unprepared, reflexes still sluggish from sleep, you stumbled a whole two steps forward before managing to check yourself.
"Poor form," the elf sneered. "You won't be killing anything like that."
Your nostrils flared, a dozen retorts surging to your lips, but you held them all in.
He's right, and you both know it.
"I wasn't ready", "I'm still waking up", "I wasn't serious" – excuses that could get you, and maybe the others, killed. How long had Nebarra seen this in you? Why was he only mentioning it now? Why hadn't you realised it on your own, that despite your confidence, your skills, your strength – you were still very much mortal? And when had that confidence become something more dangerous – arrogance?
"...What?" Nebarra asked suddenly, drawing you from your reverie. "You have that expression again. The one where you're about to do something stupid."
"Spar with me."
"Terrible idea, absolu... wait. What?"
"Spar with me," you repeated, staring into the black of his visor. "I'm getting rusty, fighting nothing but bandits and mindless undead. This just proved it."
Nebarra was silent for a beat, his head tilting to the side. Something about the motion reminded you of a bird; the eagle-shaped helm only added to the effect. You waited patiently for his answer, wondering what exactly he had to consider –
Metal, arcing toward your sword arm.
You barely managed a dodge and a weak parry with the flat of your blade – you'd been holding it low, unready. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Clearly, Nebarra was done thinking – the two of you were sparring now.
Fair enough. Enemies wouldn't be so polite as to give you time to gear up, either. And now, for once, the odds weren't in your favour: a fully-armoured Altmer veteran with decades of experience, versus you, young, disoriented, and unarmored, only a single blade in hand.
It was thrilling.
You sidestepped another swing of Nebarra's blade – only to connect with it a moment later, coming out of the feint you had failed to read.
Sharp, stinging pain. Scarlet, dripping from your arm.
He was trying to hurt you. And you were giving him ample opportunity.
You needed to ground yourself, regain your rhythm – something you couldn't do without an opening, and Nebarra wasn't giving you any.
A glint of metal on the left – block, step back. Movement overhead, an oncoming blow – raise your sword, throw your weight behind it, disrupt his momentum.
At least, you tried. Fully armoured as he was, Nebarra had an extra thousand angaids of weight behind his swing, if not more. The sheer force of his blow knock your sword out of your hands, sending you staggering back. But the grass underfoot was slick with the morning's dew, and you were moving too fast, too unsteadily. Before you knew it, your back was colliding with the ground, and all you could see was grey sky overhead – and a golden sword coming down.
Careless.
But there was still a chance.
Contorting violently, you grabbed Nebarra's arm as the blade sailed by, nicking your face as it passed. You didn't let go of his arm just yet, though. Instead, you pulled, leveraging your weight against his, abdomen taut as you used him to haul yourself upright. Nebarra, clearly not expecting such a move, found himself betrayed by his own momentum, drawing him forward and down, aided by your weight. Gravity took care of the rest, and he crashed towards the earth, twisting even as he fell to avoid face-planting into the ground.
As he struggled to right himself, you rushed to retrieve your sword; Nebarra was already rising by the time you turned back to him.
"No you don't," you growled, charging the mer, sword raised.
His hand shot out, a ward rippling to life, though it buckled slightly under your sword's impact. Nebarra staggered, his half-risen stance precarious, unbalanced.
Now. Now. Now.
Once, twice, thrice more your sword glanced off the ward – and on the fourth blow, it shattered, leaving the Altmer open to your assault.
Metal clanged as you brought your sword down, colliding with his gauntlet as he struggled to block with it, not given enough time to raise his own sword in defense. You let the blade slide off, intending to follow up with its momentum, but Nebarra didn't give you a chance. The moment the sword glanced off his gauntlet, he lunged, catching you in the abdomen and bringing the both of you to the ground.
The tussle that followed was a blur.
His sword arcing down, yours blocking. Hilts catching, blades flying, yanked out of your grasp and his.
Panted breaths, heaving chests, grappling and rolling across the grass.
A glint caught your eye – your sword and Nebarra's, just within reach.
He saw it too, the both of you reaching out in unison for your weapons, desperate to be faster than the other.
Leather-bound metal brushed against your palm – the hilt. Your hand closed around it, drawing it in close. Brought it swiftly upwards, blade against Nebarra's neck.
At its touch, he froze – and so did you. Because resting against your own neck, biting into the tender flesh, was the edge of Nebarra's blade.
Stalemate.
Ears ringing, heart racing, you shift your gaze from the sword to the one holding it.
Hunched over and straddling you, a leg to either side of your waist, there was hardly any distance between your bodies. The beak of his helm was close enough to brush your nose; your breath fogged on the metal. His gasping breaths may has well have been your own – you could feel them, swift and hot, slipping through the gold feathers that covered his face, carrying the faint scent of wine.
Of course, he'd been drinking. It had probably kept him warm through the night – and he'd still managed to keep you off-balanced for most of the fight.
You were in worse shape than you'd thought.
That, or... maybe Nebarra was better than he'd ever let on.
"...Tonight," you breathed, staring up at him. "Let's... spar again tonight."
Nebarra grunted; you could hear the sound echo faintly in his helmet. "Fine. Don't expect me to go easy on you."
A smile tugged at your mouth – you could feel your lips crack and stretch at the motion, dried out in the cold; you gave them a brief lick before answering. "What, and this was?"
Another affirmative grunt. "I'll be sober by tonight. Unfortunately."
You snorted, then fell silent once more. With your eyes, you found yourself tracing the curves of his helm, pausing at the sight of his bangs peeking through, dark and tangled threads of gold. Something about them was like an itch you couldn't scratch, and you had the sudden urge to brush them aside, or at least tuck them back into his helm.
As your gaze drifted upward, toward the visor, a glint in its shadows caught your eye. Again, you paused, staring intently into the dark.
A reflective sheen, a gleam of crimson –
"Are you done breathing on one another, yet?"
Xelzaz's voice shattered your focus, and both you and Nebarra snapped your heads toward the sound.
The Argonian stood just outside the tent, arms crossed, head bare of its usual hood, scales shimmering in the pale light. Beside him was Khash, a shadowy smudge in the mist; her wide red eyes seemed to float amidst the grey.
"Good morning," you said stupidly, even as Nebarra scrambled to get off you.
"Why were you fighting?" Khash asked. "Did something happen?"
"For your – obviously necessary – information," Nebarra sniffed, dusting off his armour, "we were sparring. And you had better get used to it. Our dear Dragonborn and I will continue to do so, apparently, starting today."
As you sat up, you distinctly heard Xelzaz mutter, "By the Hist." When he turned his head to you once more, there was something incredibly deadpan about his gaze, an unspoken, "Really?" in his eyes.
"What?" you mouthed back, blinking at him in confusion. He only shook his head, and have no answer.
"Right... Well, let's get the fire going again, and I'll see about getting us all breakfast."
At that, Khash's gaze snapped towards him. "Ohh, Xelzaz, can I have some Hackle-lo with it?"
"Khash, you've eaten almost my whole stock."
"Oh..."
"...I'll see if I can't spare a few more."
"Yay! Heh."
"Horker stew for you, Nebarra?"
"I'm too tired to say no... but I'll watch you every moment of its making."
"Yes, yes, as usual. And what of you, friend?" Xelzaz turned towards you, and for a moment, you couldn't answer him – you'd been too distracted watching the scene unfold, a smile on your face.
"Ah... it doesn't matter to me, I suppose. Surprise me."
And so, thirty minutes later, as the sun climbed through the sky and burned away the mist, breakfast was served.
But for some strange reason, all throughout the meal, you found your gaze drawn... repeatedly...
...to Nebarra.
#nebarra#nebarra skyrim#skyrim nebarra#skyrim#i havent written action in YEARS i hope its passable#i tried to remember what my two whole gumdo lessons were like back in high school :DDD#also fyi i know ZILCH abt tes lore n stuff so uhhh pls be gentle w me on that front#i literally spent ten minutes looking up tamrielic weight measurements and then trying to convert that it to pounds and back#and apparently its only referenced in a book that appears in like four of the games so its clearly an OLD book#likely that tamriel doesnt even use that unit of measurement anymore but damnit i wanted to get SOMETHING accurate#anyway that was quite enough research for me tyvm#like mate i just wanna romance this sardonic sunflower#speaking of which i wanna give him flowers?? dont ask me why i just do#give him a boquet of yellow mountain flowers like#'i saw them and thought they looked like u'#to which he scoffs and VERY GRUDGINGLY accepts ONE#prolly tells us to give the rest to khash or xelzaz#fast forward several to months later and somehow we find that one flower v carefully pressed n preserved amongst his belongings#dont touch me i just made myself sOFT thinking about this#im literally gonna have to write it now dammit#dali this is all ur fault u have unleashed the floodgates of my garbage bin brain#........thank u :D#anyway yeah this was originally written for my ldb oc which is why the personality of the ldb here may be a bit.... specific? idk#just swapped pronouns to make it more self-insert/other people's oc friendly#anyway thank god its finally done; only took me three days#not super happy with the ending but oh well#'swhat happens when u dont write for over a year#rUST#rusty as lbd's fighting in this fic#whisper writes
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shaking lawrence gordon round like a bug in a jar
#txt#rewatching saw. again#oghh hes so. hes so.#tightly wound n controlled n losing that control is. mwah#n esp w the details we get from the script like oh man.#i dont like to armchair diagnose esp as a neurotypical but theres smth going on w that man.#isnt there a bit in the script abt his routine (PRINTED) saying shit like. 6am gym. 7am smoothie. etc#n apprentice lawrence adds another layer like oughhhh u lost everything (incl assuming ur marriage bc lack of wedding ring etc) so like#he got out of the bathroom for them but lost them anyway. so turned to apprenticehood (partially bc well. pried over to that thinking)#(during his. recovery)#n like. oughhh lawrence.#hes so. hes soooo.#the movie + the script u rlly do get a sense of how much he values his sense of control. even if its not. what he wants?#eg the cheating stuff ohhh my god#anyway. lawrence im tapping the screen i wanna study u like a bug#n the bit james wan said in the commentary about him n adam switching roles (calming vs stressed etc) throughout the movie oughh#<- extremely simplified but waghh
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feeling like im being driven to my execution (its a drs appointment)
#p#also thats a little dramatic but i do hate them so much#i was feelin like well ill be uncomfortable n miserable but its not the end of the world#buuuut then i remembered (TMI AHEAD U HAVE BEEN WARNED)#that last month ish when i was here for an actual concern (n agreed to this physical bleh)#i was told im overdue for another pap smear n like they cant force me into it ofc but i know its smart to do it#cuz i already have lots of anxieties abt what if i secretly have some disease or condition n im gonna die blah blah blahh#but last time it was so awful n i was like crying thru it cuz of the pain which. isnt normal#googling it afterwards i found ppl saying stuff like 'it might be weird n uncomfortable but not too bad'#so i was like well ok thats just me then i guess :/#n anyway i def think i have that condition called w/e cuz ive never been able to do any kind of like. anything in there#not like day to day its a huge deal but for this its not too fortunate :/#so long story short i remembered ill have to decide if ill let them do it again at this appt#n i was reading abt the process again n then uh oh crying -_-#omw now n idk what ill do tbh. def wanna say no but also idk i shld be responsible or smth#dies instead.#n anyway even if its just the super basic physical theyre gonna do ill still wanna become an incorporeal entity thing#hate it hereeeee (body)#its a PA im seeing who i remember being nice some other time i saw her so theres that at least#theyre gonna wanna weigh me tho i forgot that too jeez#i said no last time but idk. kms
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Ah my shits getting flagged
How tf do u tag for n sfw without it immediately trigfering what I’m assuming is an app sweep for it
Regardless I need to find a better censoring workaround anyway and learn preview box dimensions
#depending on what gets flagged I’ll be finagling a crop and link#saw a method for lining to a draft to keep it internal and I wanna try that#regardless my shits public on Twitter I just don’t tag shit there because god forbid they have a spaced tagging system like this bad boy#anyhooooooo lmao it be what it be and I do apreciate the anon reminding me to be smarter on new pop stuff#but ye how do I tag for nsf w without program sweeping me lmao#cause I hate spacing n s f w out but want to make sure I hit ppls blacklist without them jumping through hoops either u know
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break up with my boyfriend?
#i havent planned anything to see each other so its been two months since i saw him#bc im the only one that does any planning#and i was sick for a minute so. peace out#oh oh but he wants to go buy his new g*n? he finds a way to get there#he wants to meet his friend to go bowling? he gets there#because the fucker is 26 and cant drive#(which is only annoying in regards to him. whatever age u are if u dont have ur license thats totally fine and okay and ily)#im just sick of driving him around#anyway#he finds a way to get everywhere else but he cant find a way to come see me#and i finally do mention it and hes like oh i wanna work extra so i can go to cons this summer#like. okay. im not on the list of things u want. cool#and all i do is accommodate u and all u do is be annoying#and fucking lazy#rebeccaspeaks
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at fitrst i thought aroace volo was jsut a cool hc but ....guys .... He just told me its true. Wtf!!!!!!!
#i have been thinkign about this while ive been sick (i am just now almost to recovery jfc!!#its been like a week+. anyways#i cant see him being into romance smth about the grief of it all with being immortal (i think cogita is in a similar boat#but i think shes more like “hopeless romantic” like she idealizes the idea of it but knows she cant commit fully without her heart breaking#but that feels like part of the reason why shes up in her funeral garb ...#mourning relationships (not just romantic either)#volo is just liek fiwb (FUCK IT WE BALLLLLL)#so my selfship is more eviil platoniic flavored#i would say queerplatonic but ive never really felt myself attached to that term idk.#i think i saw a term called solaic that i liked onced but id have to reread the desc again to see ifi it fits with me n vol#i just think we are evil but friends but liikre in the aromantic way (we aere both aromantic) so its not “{friendship”#its not besties..#but its not romantic u feel me#hjust evilpilled aros. what they do#trans too#SWAAAG#ugh i meed to make a list of my f/os with our anniv dates cuz i wanna celebrate but its ;like bdays if its not in front of my facve my adhd#ass will forget#kewl. anyways#1.8.24#i also psychologically torture rye thnx for asking
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pov me spending multiple man-hours trying to suss out if i need to spend a fiver on a vpn so i can start torrenting
#like according to recent reddit threads from ireland by and large it seems to be 'nobody gives a shit'#'your isp might send u aletter but they wont do anything abt it'#but i dont wanna get a letter bcos itd go to my parents :/#n also i saw nobody w personal experience w my isp so shug...#like it would probably just make the most sense at this point to spend a fiver for a month of vpn n suss it out like that#might try n download stuff en masse ill like take a day or smthn
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bringing people together is an ability handed to just a few people. having a sense of community and the beautiful power of putting things together is the thing on you, from all the things i love about you, that i love the most! it makes me feel happy for being part of it, part of the things you put together. maybe you didn't even notice and, don't worry that's the fun in all that. because gen, you are the rope that holds us together. and we all feel safe with you. even the ones who support our rival teams, even the ones who are not into footblr that much. thank you for being exactly who you are <3
🥹😭😭 nikkaaa. ffs bruh wtfff 🙏🏿💗 idek what to sayyyy man. thank you so much? i love you to the moon and back? this is insane to me? i will cherish this? you're so nice??? 🤕💗
"because gen, you are the rope that holds us together. and we all feel safe with you. even the ones who support our rival teams, even the ones who are not into footblr that much. thank you for being exactly who you are <3"
🫂🫂🫂. that made a little tender ngl. idk about alldat bc that feels sooo big and i do not feel big at all. or even that ppl feel that way. but you feel that way and that makes me wanna cry 🥹🫂 thank you smmmm <333 im sorry im not a wordsmith rn it's the morning and ive had a Day already so i can't respond to this with all my love and affection for generous words but just know that i rlly appreciate you and possibly others even thinking of me and my account in sucha way. ill continue 2 b myself ofc n YOU do the same !!!!
#the marcus image... the words!#🥹🫂💗#mane im weak idk what 2 say or do#i saw this yesterday n i didnt have words so i wanted to leave it for tomorrow but#i still have absolutely zero words other than '@**>××**× I LOVE NIKKA'#i wanna cry idk to sayyy#ill be always here 4 u nikka just know that 🙏🏿🙏🏿#asks#<3 fav tag#4 me#nikka tag 💗#friends#this is gonna be my tramp tattoo
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