#and if i die? fuck it

[chucapybara]

y'know the funny thing is that i'm not even into sci-fi. futuristic settings aren't typically my cup of tea. but signalis SLAPS

[teaboot]

Okay so I'm a security guard, right

And part of why I like my job is cause I'm pretty good at deescalating conflicts without violence or police involvement

And that *might* be because my primary coping mechanism for stress is humor, and if the guy in the uniform isn't stressed out, usually nobody else is either

But anyhow today I witnessed a crime, which 911 had already been called for

And I'm telling the guy, you know, as he's running away, that nobody's gonna touch him, we don't do that here, I don't have any weapons and he can totally walk on out if he wants to

And he gives me this 'go-fuck-yourself" type answer, right? As you do

And I fucking

I fucking. Start danCING

I DONT KNOW WHY

I WAS JUST LIKE "aight guess I'll go fuck myself then, cheerio" AND START FUCKING DANCING

LIKE MY BRAIN WAS LIKE "Cool not being attacked, gotta keep the witnessed calm, gotta stay chill and breezy" AND THE PHYSICAL RESPONSE FOR THAT WAS TO SYART DOING THIS SASSY FUCKING JIG

I DIDNT EVEN REALIZR I WAS FDOUNG IT UNTIL SOMEONE POIU TED IT OUT AFTER

and it all ended fine and the dude is in custody and I get a call from my boss like "Yeah we're gonna need to send footage to police"

AND

FUCKING

THIS IS GOING TO BE SHOWN IN COURT SOMEWHERE

IM DOUNG A SRUPID LITTLE DANCE ON CAMERA AS THIS GUY LOSES HIS MIND AND ITS GONNA BE ON COURT SOMEWHERW

THIS IS THE STUPIDEST FUCKING THING IVE WVER DONE

I HATE MYSELFD

[arkangelo-7]

Lex Luthor hates Superman, Lex Luthor hates the Justice League, bla bla bla… You know who Lex must really hate? Bruce Wayne.

Because he knows that bitch is Batman. He’d worked it through that big brain of his and he’s without a doubt certain that the same idiot who spilled champagne on him last New Year’s Eve moonlights as the Batman.

But he can’t fucking prove it. So he’s resigned to a lifetime of having to make stilted conversation filled with double meaning while Brucie just flutters his eyelashes and pretends to be a ditz. And Lex just has to sit there and take it, because Bruce knows that Lex knows and absolutely uses that knowledge to fuck with Alex at every opportunity—he says the absolute shittest, godawful pickup lines and flirts to his heart’s content, knowing full well that he helped Superman kick Lex’s ass last week and that Lex knows it was him.

[boltlightning]

oh my god. og my god. the symbolism of it all

[dragoncarrion]

Fucking hate ai bitches this shit is poisoning my search results just like that tumblr baby crow post fuck y'all for real

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

"smart appliances" fuck u i want them dumb as a brick and incidentally as sturdy and enduring

[benjingler]

Conjured this at 4am (it's 4am)

[lastoneout]

People don't like to admit it bcs cringe or w/e but Homestuck really did revolutionize the webcomic as a storytelling medium and I am endlessly frustrated that before webcomic artists could really stretch our legs fucking webtoonz swooped in, set a new, more restrictive standard, and then monetized and monopolized the ever living fuck out of the concept of The Webcomic until it drove away anyone who couldn't be a professional quality manga artist for free, and now the only webcomics that actually feel like spiritual successors to Homestuck are so obscure they're basically cult classics that you have to beg people to read.

Like it's just so wild to be in high school and see Homestuck be like "we're using like fifteen different artistic mediums to tell this story bcs we can" and be really fucking inspired by that, only to grow up and see basically every webcomic ever have to conform to One Single Standard or fucking perish.

[artkaninchenbau]

Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)

It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.

Bonus:

[scriblesandbits]

God IS a middle schooler and we ARE a science project except he does know we exist and has very mixed feelings about the whole ordeal

[humming-fly]

was anyone gonna tell me shadow saved rouge's life in sa2 or was I just supposed to find that out playing the game myself

(this worked out as a rather fitting closer for the Final Day in Year of Shadow haha, hope ya'll have a fun new year! 🎉🎉🎉)

[lapdogchase]

i’ve begun saying people “obviously aren’t in a romantic relationship, they have something deeper and more intimate going on” as this seems to confuse and upset alloromantics

(ID: a banner with text over the aro flag. the text says: i don't care about blorbotags go wild but this post is about hating the hierarchial system of relationships & if you're mad about it you're probably been poisoned by ace discourse brainworms. and are also proving my point. /end ID)

[lotus-pear]

lore accurate double black battle scene

[angelofdumpsterfires]

we won but at what cost

[roadstostray]

oh jeez. so much broken glass. ill get the vacuum

bonus facts about this piece under the cut

ANYA: I gave her the nighttime screen because shes associated primarily with it. but in addition to that, I chose the nightscreen for her death being the brightest thing for her in the darkest time (why the moon is on hery) she takes power away from jimmy by making that choice. If you look in her eyes, you will see a bottle of pills. yeah. you get it. The glass shatter also represents her death

SWANSEA: first of all, I've grown up drawing nothing but twinks and furries. drawing swansea was the most fun ive ever had drawing something completely new. fat old man supremacy. okay, but i chose the sunset screen for swansea as he is a fading light. still bright, sticking around, but "on his way out." i added some pink to the water reflection to represent Daisuke and his influence on Swansea. Also there is a gun in his eyes. and the bullet hole glass. It's chaotic due to the nature of the wound (thanks jimbus) and for the fact i couldn't figure out how to do two bullet wounds.

DAISUKE (🎉): i picked the daylight screen for daisuke because of his bright personality. the clouds represent his doubt in being on the tulpar, but insistence on making the most of it. he has a slit on his brow and i hand it to you to decide which you like more. Either a scar from skateboarding that he tells people is from getting into a fight, or alternatively just something he does to be cool. he has an axe highlight in his eyes, in addition to the glass shatter being that of an axe hitting glass. chaotic, messy, but ensuring a mercy kill. thats why it's not clean at all.

Jimmy and Curly: Originally, jimmy was facing the viewer, and curly was also looking to the viewer. after an artistic fit of mania, i completely restructured him to turn his back on both the tulpar crew and the viewer. he looks to the viewer instead of curly, because he wants to be seen. even if he cannot face his actions (or us, the player.) I decided to put him in the blood ocean in curly's nightmares. jimmy displaces himself from a place of friendship to one belonging in nightmares. specifically for his treatment of curly. he invades curly's greatest fears as an unseen horror. i also realized curly would be looking to jimmy, as he never looks away from him in the game. gunshot glass shatter for jimmy too. its especially pretty because it was the best thing his ass could have done (i just thought it looked cool. no symbolism there)

stupid fun facts, to get references for jimmy i used vrchat.

bonus these as icons/wallpapers. use em with credit

[yuri-hell-world]

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