#and i'm like??? where??? it's not very fun

[hedgehog-moss]

I've said goodbye to half of my greenhouse goldfish! And the other half will follow later. I started out with goldfish when my aquaponics system was new as they are quite resilient to variations in pH, etc, but I decided it was time to move on to edible fish (carp.) I feel like carp have a bad reputation (as food) but my mum used to fish & cook them when I was little and I liked them—I'll have to ask her to teach me how she prepared them...

To thank my goldfish for their good work fertilising my greenhouse plants, I wanted to find a nice place for them to retire. Here's their new home :)

One of my distant neighbours has this artificial pond where he used to have goldfish but their population got decimated by a gluttonous otter. I hope *my* fish will be smart and agile enough to escape her, and if not, well... the otter's family has to eat...

The process of finding a new home for my fish went as follows: 1. Find an old lady, for example Mrs L. at the library, who likes to talk about people's lives and minor problems 2. Tell her in passing that I have goldfish I'd like to donate 3. Wait a few days, then go buy groceries.

The cashier told me "Oh hey, Mrs L. told me to tell you she knows someone who knows someone who wants your fish. She gave me a piece of paper with his phone number"

4. Success.

I called this person, and it turned out to be the farmer I often buy hay from, who told me all about his problematic otter and said he'd like to repopulate his pond. I offered to bring him my fish, and then proceeded to procrastinate for several weeks. I realised this week that I was going to see this neighbour again soon (when he comes to deliver my hay) and it would be embarrassing if I still hadn't made good on my promise to deliver fish, so I finally set to work catching 15 goldfish.

It took SO LONG. I think the reason I procrastinated is because my subconscious knew catching them would be a pain. They are so quick and nimble! And unlike otters I am not designed for this. There was one barracuda of a goldfish that I particularly wanted to catch, but she was too smart for me. She feinted and hid behind the filter and sacrificed fellow goldfish by pushing them into my net instead of her, it was very dramatic and eventually I had to give up on catching her.

(I even tried to use a large piece of chicken netting on top of my fish net, but of course it was very light and floated at the surface. I considered tying little rocks to it so it'd sink, and then realised I had single-handedly (re)invented bottom trawling. But I don't want to be a bottom trawler, it sounds like an insult. I'll have to try and catch my monster goldfish some other time when she least expects it.)

On my way to my neighbour's farm, I ran into a cow roadblock. Normally I would have pushed the cows aside, removed the rope across the road then put it back behind me after crossing the cowblock—but the cow in charge looked grouchy to me.

I made a détour.

Then, because the universe really didn't want me to deliver my goldfish, I ran into a goose patrol when I reached my neighbour's farm. I now know how Odysseus felt when Poseidon kept throwing sea monsters and other obstacles at him to prevent him from reaching his destination.

I dispatched Pandolf to parley with them and he looked very unenthused by his mission.

Fortunately, the geese were in a good mood and politely escorted us to the pond.

Goodbye, friends! Remember, there's a snake in this Eden. An adorable, web-footed, fish-eating snake.

Most of the fish dispersed quickly, but I thought it was so cute how these two leisurely swam away together...

And so I went and bought new fish for my greenhouse tanks. I'm going to miss the goldfish! They're cheerful to look at and I liked sitting by the tank and watching them go about their day. My new fish are better camouflaged and will be harder to observe. But it was fun watching their first introduction to goldfish society :)

[logaenhowlett]

THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD IN HER HANDS - L.H.

Summary: After months of watching you relentlessly try to gain control of your powers, Logan finally takes matters into his own hands.

Pairing: Logan Howlett x Female Reader

Warnings: Fluff - so much damn fluff, Slight angst, Language

A/N: Suffering from writer's block on a plot-driven angsty Logan fic so I wrote this to focus on something else. Shout out to End by Frank Ocean. Enjoy!

MASTERLIST

“You’ve been going at it for hours.”

His voice makes you pause, shifting your concentration to the man leaning against the door frame. Logan watches as you swing your head down, possibly frustrated by his interruption.

“Professor said I’d get better at this,” You swipe the sweat off your face, grabbing your drenched shirt as it clings to your skin, “It’s been months and I'm nowhere near strong enough.”

He huffs in amusement, he would often catch you in moments like these, tiring yourself hour after hour till you were exhausted enough to finally pass out. It reminds him of his early days at this place. Young and eager to prove himself to everyone here, that he was capable of being good once again.

“Old man doesn’t know what he’s talkin’ about.” A measly attempt to shut down your self-deprecation, he knows nothing will convince you otherwise, that much he learned over the last few times he tried reasoning with you. When you shoot him a questioning glance, he relents, raising his hands up in defense. “Alright. But you’re not doing any good wearing yourself to the bone.”

“I just want to be like Storm and Scott and you.” 

“Well, if that’s the case, the bar ain’t that high.” A teasing grin shining as he approaches you, the annoyed expression on your face does little to stop him. “Come with me.”

“What?”

He chuckles at your confusion, wandering dangerously close into your personal space. “I wanna show you something,” He murmurs.

Flirting isn’t a new concept to him at all. Though you never get used to his attempts, always brushing it off with the assumption that it’s just a game.

“Logan - I need to keep practicing.” You take a few steps back, creating a little distance from his very distracting presence. “It’s the only way I’ll get better at controlling this.”

“Okay.” He drags out, “You can still keep doing this when we come back.”

As you contemplate his request, he knows he has you convinced, a grin tugging on his lips. “Come on. It’ll be fun.”

When he leads you to the mansion's garage, you recall all the times he'd whisked you away from moments of misery and fatigue. He seemed to have this innate ability to know when you're in over your head, too absorbed into whatever you were doing to take a step back and relax. A tinge of embarrassment creeps into your thoughts, feeling bad for him to constantly keep checking in as if you were incapable of knowing your limits. Fuck, I'm a mess. You snap yourself from going down the negative route, shifting your focus to Logan, a chuckle escapes you.

“You know he hates it when you steal his bike, right?”

He swings a leg over, revving the engine. The sound seems to unintentionally comfort you, your mind having subconsciously associated it with him. Despite Scott being the owner of vehicle, he rarely saw it since it was Logan’s choice of transportation. Fucking dickhead, he used to curse up and down, unwillingly giving up after Charles reasoned with him one too many times. You remember the entire ordeal, having to intervene during one of their many childish fights when Scott attempted to blow up Logan’s ass.

“I’ll fill up the tank.”

“No, you won’t.” A short laugh leaves you as you wrap your arms around him.

He flashes a smile, tilting his head back to ensure you’re properly seated. “No, I won’t.”

You hardly pay attention to his driving, instead mindlessly watching the scenery zip past. It wasn't the first time Logan had taken you on a ride. In fact, after the initial fear, you had grown fond of this time you got share with him. A quiet and peaceful journey where you could turn your restless mind off and simply enjoy each other's company. An unspoken vow of trust had always lingered between you two, which was something he cherished more than he could ever express. He smiles softly at the weight of you resting on his back as the breeze encompasses around you.

“How’d you even find this place?” You ask, sliding off the seat as he kicks the stand.

“Used it for shelter during that snowstorm a while ago. The bike gave out on me.”

You hum in response, spinning on your feet to look around. It's an abandoned gas station that had definitely seen better days. Despite all the damage and vandalisation, it was an oddly interesting location, a lake nearby overlooking lush fields. Nothing in Logan's expression gives away his intention of bringing you here. He slowly steps backwards, a hint of a smirk tugging his lips and when he's a decent distance away, “Hit me.”

“What?”

“Use your power, sweetheart. Don’t be scared, you can do it.” It's rather encouraging and not at all akin to his usual cocky tone.

“Logan - what, no!” You exclaim, finding his proposal ridiculous. “I’m not - I can’t even fully control it. What if I hurt you?”

He scoffs, amused you could even suggest such a thing, “Well, you’re gonna have to control it, aren’t ya?” When you make no attempt to try, his gaze softens, “I can take it.”

You take a deep breath, channelling your focus to create a ball of energy between your hands. Despite being small, it hits him with enough force to push him back a few steps. A groan leaves him as he clutches his stomach, you shift to run towards him but he lifts his hand, making you stop.

“Again. Don’t hold back.”

This time you think of Charles, remembering all the lessons and training sessions you've had with him. Where you had always doubted yourself, he had constantly reassured you and your ability to control your gift. The ball of energy grows more between your hands, crackling with intensity. Using all your might, you aim at Logan once again, hitting him square in the chest, thrusting him back several feet, the impact denting the ground in the process. He stands up feeling a bit lightheaded, though that sensation disappears as he flexes his muscles, grateful for his healing factor.

“I did it!” You laugh in surprise, running to him.

His arms immediately wrap around you, slightly lifting you off the ground. “You did it,” He says with a faint smile, taking in your satisfaction.

Caught up in moment of finally making progress, you notice the lack of space between Logan and you. And suddenly, his hands on your waist, his tender expression, it all becomes too much, making you pull back. “You’re insane. That could’ve gone so wrong,” You spit out, trying to relieve some tension.

“I trust you.” He whispers, softly.

Your body seems to be on fire, everything about this begins to overwhelm your senses. With a shaky breath, you try stepping away from his gentle grip.

“Why do you always run from me?” His words still your movements. His eyes can't seem to find yours, instead settling on the charred ground beneath him, "I know… you feel this too.”

“I’m - I don’t…”

“Let me in, sweetheart. I won’t run away.” He approaches you, giving you the space to reject his advances. ”I promise.”

When you don't respond, he hangs his head low, accepting your decision. “Let’s go home,” He mumbles.

As you walk down the hallway to your room, you can't seem to shake the urge to run back to him. You take a moment, hand grasping your doorknob before you spin around. Within seconds of knocking on his door, he swings it open catching your distinct heartbeat on the other side.

“Logan - I just…” The words die on your tongue. Every little feeling you'd held for him comes rushing forward. As he stands there, growing concerned for your wellbeing, all you can think about is kissing him till the air leaves your lungs.

“You okay?”

That's enough for you to slam into him. You grab the collar of his white shirt, pulling him down. Your lips find his own, slowly moving against the soft flesh. It takes him less than a second to comprehend what's happening before he reciprocates your actions.

You tilt your head back, inhaling his comforting scent. He continues peppering kisses on your face, unable to stop once he finally got a taste. “I'm sorry, I was scared. I am scared,” You whisper.

“I know. But I’m here for you. I’m always gonna be here for you.” He murmurs against your lips, “If you let me.”

Your smile sends flutters to his heart. His low chuckle echoes within you as he leans down, capturing your lips with a hunger he'd suppressed for as long as he could remember. When your moan teases his senses, he lifts you with ease, one arm securing your waist and the other gently stroking the underside of your thigh. He lowers you down onto the bed, noting your exhaustion from earlier. Sliding right next to you, he presses a light kiss on your temple, pulling you into his warm embrace. A silent promise that he'll never let you go.

[fuckingrecipes]

how does one go about choosing what kind of onion they want to use? i'm at that stage of cooking where i feel comfortable freehanding stuff but i don't have a decision process for white/yellow/red onion beyond what's already in my fridge, lol.

Yellow Onion: Good all-around, general use onion. Good for Caramelizing, and just about any onion need.

Sweet Onions (Vidalia): A particularly mild version of a yellow onion, grown around Vidalia, Georgia. Crunchy and sweet! Walla Walla is another brand of sweet onion, grown in Washington, USA. Can be eaten like an apple tbh. REALLY GOOD for people who are sensitive to the strong flavor of onion.

White Onion: A little sweeter and milder than the yellow onion, but not as sweet as a sweet onion. Good for dicing and serving raw if you don't have red onion. Yellow and White onions are pretty much interchangeable.

Red Onion: Great Raw! Have a bit of spice to them, and make a very interesting savory flavor when cooked. (Red onion skins can be made into a dye!)

Green Onions/Scallions: Immature onions with white bottoms and green tops. Usually diced/sliced and used raw as a garnish or a mild raw onion flavor. Can be used to replace raw onion in bulk for a milder alternative.

Chives: Tinier, punchier alternative to green onions/scallions. While in the same Allium family as the rest of these, they never get bigger than their little grassy figure. Teeeeny tiny! Great for adorable garnishes and just a hint of onion in a salad. Not good for cooking with, they get bitter fast.

Shallots: Garlicky! Kinda a halfway point between 'onion' and 'garlic'. They stay small when fully matured, and have quite a bite when used raw. Cooked, they become mellow and have a less-intense garlic-onion flavor. Often used in sauces where you want a little onion and garlic flavor, but subtly. They're REALLY good roasted.

Leek: Basically like a giant green onion, except they're always like that. Can be used in place of Onion in nearly any recipe that doesn't require caramelization. Fun slice shape! Gentle onion flavor without a lot of bite. Best when cooked, not raw imo.

Kurrat (Egyptian Leek): Like a stronger, punchier version of the leek. Excellent roasted, sauteed, used in soups - very strong flavor and KEEPS its flavor, so its usually used in smaller quantities than other alliums.

[mywritersmind]

DRUNK THOUGHTS - LN4

summary : He’s drunk and on a dock, nothing can go wrong. Except maybe him confessing his love to his taken best friend.

listen up : drunk lando! reader has a bf but no cheating involved!! maybe a pt.2 but prob not? i’ve kinda been unmotivated but if u have ideas my requests are open!

word count : 653

⋆｡‧˚⋆

I find him on a dock, his arm touching the water and his body laying down to face the stars.

I wobble down the wooden path, taking my heels off and pulling my dress down a bit. I’ve been drinking and dancing all night, yet my experience doesn’t even come close to Lando’s night.

He turns his head when he hears my footsteps, “Wanted to make sure you were still alive.” I look at his body, he’s in baby blue pants and a half undone shirt.

I left my boyfriend who was getting eaten alive by mosquitoes to come check on him, feeling a bit tipsy and more than happy to be alone with him.

“Y/n!” He grins and points at me, yup he’s definitely drank more than me, “Hi!”

I laugh and squat next to him, “Hi Lan. Fun night?”

“Oh definitely!” he giggles, his hand patting the place next to him. I sigh and lay down, looking up at the night sky. “You?”

“Very fun.” He’s looking at me still, I glance to him, a curl fallen into his face and his eyes are all soft and shaded from the lack of light.

It’s almost unfair, how beautiful he is.

“I like your dress!” He smiles, his hand gently running against the hem of it. It’s small and black and his touch makes goosebumps run through me.

“I like your necklace.” I reach over and run my fingers over his logo, “Very nice.”

“Would be nicer on you.” Lando’s always like this. Drunk or not, he’s a flirt.

“Ya think?”

“I know.” He looks back up like it’s nothing, “Would be even nicer if it was the only thing you were wearing.” the words come out so quick and easy that I almost think I hallucinated them. Lando’s flirty, sure, but my boyfriend is almost always around so he doesn’t mess around too much.

Apparently drunk him does.

I practically choke, “Oh?”

His head turns to me again, his eyes roaming my features, “You're so pretty.” He says softly, “Like really reallyyyy gorgeously you.”

“I- thank you?”

“Everyone thinks it. All the guys who stare at you but they don’t get it. Not even your lover boy.” He shakes his head matter of factly, “No no no. I do. I hate those guys.”

“What guys?” I laugh.

“You do not have very good vision.” He smacks his lips together, “Everyone looks.”

I laugh, honestly thinking he’s joking, “They’re always looking at you- the famous one.”

He shakes his head again, adamant I'm wrong, “No no pretty. They don’t give a nothing about me.”

“I think you do pretty well.” I raise a brow, “You were basically followed by a group of girls down here.” I’m not sure where they went but they were fawning over Lando.

He shrugs, “Bachelorette party. It’s basically my job.” I laugh and he looks offended that I did, “I wish you followed me.”

Suddenly his words aren’t funny anymore.

“But your bloody boy…” He makes a disgusted face, I thought he didn’t mind him. “Bleh. You’re better.”

“I didn’t know you disliked him.”

“Why would I like the bloke who’s in love with the girl I'm in love with?” His casual tone strikes again, this time stabbing me through the heart. We’re friends. We’ve always been friends. I thought my own feelings had gone long before this trip- before my boyfriend!

I can’t fancy Lando and he cannot be in love with me.

“You’re so drunk.” I laugh it off but he just stares at me. He doesn’t seem to know that he just said he loves me.

“Drunk words are-”

“Sober thoughts.” I finish for him, His body shifting to lay on his stomach, an arm across my waist. “Yeah I know.”

“You always understand me.” He whispers and it breaks me in two. “Thank you.”

“Let’s get you back, Lan.”

[loggiepj]

illicit affairs

part 3 | part 4

"SOMEONE got flowers," Yelena teased the moment you set foot inside your office.

"What are you talking about?" you asked, brows only knitted in confusion.

When Yelena finally let you through, your eyes quickly caught sight of a bouquet of daisies on top of your desk. It came with a note that says 'Have a lovely day!' , and even if it had no name who it was from, you immediately knew it was from Wanda. She was the only one who knew you liked daisies anyway. And she now owned her own flower shop.

Anger and shame only filled you as you hastily threw the bouquet of flowers into the bin next to your desk, making Yelena gasp in horror.

Kate laughed. "That's the fourth bouquet she threw this week."

Yelena then grabbed the flowers and shook the dust off gently with her hands. "It's such a waste. Do you know how expensive flowers are these days? I'm gonna take this if you don't want it. This could be useful—"

"Why? You planning to reuse them?" Kate intervened with a nervous laugh, leaving her desk as she approached the blonde woman. In the untrained eye, it looked like she was only joking. But you knew there was a hint of jealousy in her words.

"What's in it for you?" Yelena replied, stepping back from Kate, hiding the bouquet behind her back.

"Nothing, nothing, of course," Kate nonchalantly answered. "So . . . you asking anyone for a date?"

Yelena sighed. "That's none of your business."

And as you listened to your friends banter on, your thoughts swam back to one specific brunette. One that had always occupied your mind these days.

You hadn't seen the woman since that very night. The very next day, while Wanda was still deep in slumber, sleeping peacefully like an angel in disguise, you silently crawled out of bed and left her in your apartment.

You didn't dare come back for two days, seeking for Kate's help as you took residence in her guest bedroom for the meantime.

Wanda sent a couple of messages asking where you were, and it only stopped when you blocked her. You hated yourself for feeling this way, for still feeling like a lost schoolgirl completely head over heels with the professor. You were weak. You were stupid.

Kate assured you that you were only human, it was natural to respond to natural urges, especially that it had been a long time since you'd had sex.

But you knew better.

If it was really a physical urge, and not Wanda herself, you needed confirmation.

MIRACULOUSLY the day after, the confirmation was in the form of your neighbor barista, Christine.

Christine had been writing her number a couple of times on the cup of the coffee you'd order everyday, next to your name that came with a cute heart drawing. But you hadn't entertain one single thought of finally asking her out.

You knew it was petty. Cruel. Selfish. You knew it would only hurt one of you, especially innocent Christine. As the saying would go, you shouldn't mess with the person who handles your food.

But on that weekend, you found yourself walking with Christine as you wander the streets of New York, finding strange street foods to try and fun carnival games to play. It would be wrong of you to admit you didn't enjoy any second spent with the girl.

Christine was nice. She was friendly, talkative and sweet, she even brought you your cup of coffee when she met you after work. You found out that she was also taking a couple of classes in the same university you worked at, wanting to become a lawyer one day.

And maybe Kate was right. If you only allowed yourself to be happy, just for one time, you'd be happy. And you thought life was finally merciful towards you.

Until you both bumped into Wanda and her twins as you and Christine headed towards the park. The twins were carrying bags of stuff from the nearby night market, while Wanda was holding two sticks of corn dog, probably she bought for her boys, and a cone of ice cream in the other.

And it was as if life had gone back on being cruel to you. Because all you could think about that moment was how Wanda looked both so beautiful and cute wearing a beanie around her head and a coat larger than her body as she licked her ice cream, trying to keep it from melting.

It tugged a string in your heart. And it hurt.

"Y/n!" Tommy said enthusiastically. "We didn't expect to see you here."

And if Wanda's glares sent your way were only daggers, you'd both be killed.

"Tommy," you replied. "Nice to see you without a cast. How's your arm?"

"Never better," he answered, as he swung his arm full of bags, pretending he was hitting a home run.

Billy added, chuckling, "He's always whining about it though, because it was itchy—"

"Shut up! I was not!"

You both laughed until you felt Christine hold your hand.

"Oh sorry, how stupid of me," you said. "Christine, these are Tommy, Billy and their mother, Miss Maximoff." You met Wanda's eyes quickly. "I used to babysit them when they were just kids. Guys, this is Christine, my . . . "

"Girlfriend," Christine confirmed, offering her hand towards them. And you froze, not really expecting her to say that. It was Wanda who reacted badly as she shook the offered hand of Christine's rather hurriedly and harshly.

"Hi," Tommy said, shaking Christine's hand last.

"How recent?" Wanda asked coldly.

"Come again?" Christine asked, giggling. "Sorry, it's just too loud here."

"Nothing," Wanda said, forcing a weak laugh. "It's just that Y/n is quite picky to date anyone. You're a lucky one, I guess."

"I'm sure she has no problem finding one, Ma'am," Christine replied with a challenging tone, making your lip tug upward. Her arm snaked around your waist as she pulled you closer towards her. "I've been trying to ask out this cutie here since the first time she bought coffee from our shop. Now, she took the bold move to finally send me a message."

"Is that so?" Wanda chuckled tauntingly, licking the melted drop of ice cream dripping down her fingers. The action made you grit your teeth. "Intriguing."

The conversation changed when Billy announced there would be an acoustic set playing that night near the park, inviting you both to watch it with them. But you respectfully declined, saying you didn't want to bother, your eyes never leaving Wanda and hers at yours, provoking you more.

AFTER you and Christine left them, Christine immediately apologized. "I'm so, so sorry, Y/n. Gosh, you might think I'm so forward—"

"For what?"

"For saying I'm your girlfriend. I know I'm not and we just dated." She sighed. "It's her, isn't she?"

You swallowed a lump in your throat as she went on. "I remember her face, she was the one who was looking for you I believe months ago. And you were so cold and frozen earlier when I touched you, thinking you were uncomfortable and all, so I panicked and decided to help. I don't know if that really helped anything. Gosh, I'm rambling—"

"Christine," you said, stopping her as you smiled. "It's fine. I'm not mad."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I'm actually grateful. Thank you for saving me from that awkward interaction."

You went on walking in silence, her arm looped in yours. The night was still young but you already wanted it to be over. Not because of Christine. But because Wanda had already spoiled the wonderful night. And you hated yourself for letting her affect you like that.

Seeing your dilemma, Christine tried to lighten the mood. "Would it be bad of me to assume you dated the milf?"

You both exploded into laughter before you began to talk about it. And Christine was very understanding. She realized then that the persistent way of her trying to ask you out made her realize that it was just a silly crush. And when she got to know you, it would be terrible to start a relationship with someone who was still not over her ex. And you completely understood her.

It was a mutual decision that you and Christine remained to be good friends and nothing more.

It was a happy night well spent with a newfound friend as you both met up with Kate and Yelena afterwards, who were apparently on a date that night. At least, it made you forget about a certain brunette.

WHEN you came back to your apartment some time later, there Wanda was sitting on the floor just outside your apartment door. She looked weary and tired, hugging her legs as she buried her head in her knees. When she heard footsteps, she immediately lifted her head to look. She quickly stood when she saw it was you who arrived and you could tell from her eyes that she was just crying.

"What are you doing here?" you asked calmly. You were tired to argue with the woman.

"Where's Christine?" Wanda asked, looking behind you.

"I gave her a ride home," you answered, picking your keys from your pocket.

Wanda nodded. "I thought . . . I thought she'd be staying here tonight—"

"And you see it best to wait here just to check?"

There was a small pause. And you knew you were cruel. But you wanted to hurt Wanda because she hurt you so much.

Wanda wiped the tears from her face as she quickly apologized and walked past you, heading to the elevator.

But maybe it was the haze from that night that made you wrap your hand around her wrist, stopping her from leaving. Maybe it was the bottle of beer you had earlier that made you kiss the old woman with fervor, pressing her against the nearby wall.

And maybe, it was the terrifying thought that you're not into Wanda anymore that made the brunette kiss you back with desperation and need, clutching your jacket so tight, claiming you as hers and only hers.

You both managed to enter your apartment with difficulty as you two began to devour each other, hitting vases and lamps along the way as you pulled her inside while taking each other's clothes off.

But maybe it was lust that made you settle on the couch as you both stumbled upon it, not wasting another second to head towards the bedroom, that made you crave for the woman straddled on top of you.

Wanda took off her brassiere then went to cup your face for another kiss. You stopped her, holding both of her wrists. Your eyes were on her breasts, her perky hard nipples.

Maybe it really was thirst that made you stare hungrily at her, how she still looked so perfect even at her age, that made your hands slide across her hips through her stomach just to cup her breasts and squeeze them.

The brunette let out a gasp on the harsh way you held her, but as she wrapped her hands around your wrists, you yanked her hands away, keeping them behind her back.

You leaned forward to suck one of her waiting nipples, closing your eyes as you savored the moment.

"Fuck, Y/n," Wanda moaned, squirming before you, helpless.

Your hand held unto her while the other slipped down to her back, inside her underwear as you played with her warm slick entrance. And it was so cruel to feel her dripping like this and you had barely touched her.

Wanda whined and shook her body, making you finally take mercy and let her go. Her hands automatically clasped unto the back of the couch as you went to devour her other nipple with same intensity, and three of your fingers finally slipping into her hole, fucking her slowly and torturously.

"Oh, god!" Maybe it really was the way Wanda sound that night that made you so aroused. You fastened your pace, making her grind her hips to meet your thrust.

Disconnecting your mouth, you leaned back to stare up at her and watch her ride your hand desperately. Hugging her waist to pull her closer to you, breasts pressing against your chin, you deepened your thrust.

"Y/n . . . Y/n, I'm—" And she sobbed a moan, her body trembling in waves as she came, her warm hole clenching around your fingers you thought they might break.

You helped her through her high, watching the angelic look on her when she comes undone before you.

Maybe Kate was wrong after all. It wasn't just any physical urge. Maybe you were still in love with Wanda. And no one could compare to her.

Maybe it was that thought that made you give up as you let Wanda kiss you fiercely, let her kneel before you as she took off your pants and underwear and let her worship you with her mouth.

THE NEXT morning was the worst as you slowly creeped off the bed, careful as to not wake the woman. But to no luck.

"Am I just a good fuck to you every now and then?" Wanda's weak sleepy voice brought a tear in your heart.

You went on dressing yourself, deciding whether to interrupt Kate and Yelena just to find a place to stay.

Hearing rustling of sheets, you turned to look at Wanda as she moved towards you wrapped only in your blanket. And she looked so helpless, that you want to take her back right that instant, to hug her and say how sorry you were for making her cry.

But you knew you couldn't. She almost killed you. It wasn't fair.

It brought tears in your eyes and you hoped she didn't notice them. "Y/n—"

"What do you want, Wanda?" you answered bitterly, almost yelling. "Do you want to cuddle under the sheets? You want a relationship? Well, you should have thought about that when you crushed my heart years ago!"

You fought back another angry remark from your throat as her eyes began to glisten with tears. "I'm so sorry."

You exhaled a frustated sigh, hand on the door. "Then I also apologize that this is all I can give to you. That you can't always get what you want."

You finally stepped outside, leaving the poor woman alone.

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[wordsarelife]

—i can fix him (no really i can)

pairing: jess mariano x fem!doose!reader

summary: jess got into another fight and you're about to clean his wounds, but he has other plans, tired of always answering your questions

warnings: kissing, making out, sexual remarks, allusions to sex

note: this was so fun to write and my first jess mariano fic, so please be gentle guys!!

“you never fail to amaze me, jess mariano“ you huffed, arms crossed as your eyes fell on the boy sitting on the curb in front of the supermarket. shadows were casted over his cheeks and he looked less than happy to see you.

"it isn't what it looks like" he muttered, trying to avert his gaze, although that was kind of hard, considering the outfit you were wearing.

your brushed your skirt to the side, before you sat down beside him. "well, it looks like you got beaten up"

"you should see the other guy" jess chuckled.

you sighed, not amused by the joke, as you softly touched his cheek.

"ow!" jess pulled his head back, trying to free it from your hands, but you were relentless, turning his chin in all possible directions to get a good look at his injuries.

"we're gonna have to clean them if you don't want them to get infected"

"i don't care about that" jess shrugged and took out a cigarette from a pocket of his jacket.

"yeah, i know tough guy". you quickly snatched the cigarette from his mouth before he was able to light it. "but i do"

"what the fuck, y/n?" jess exclaimed annoyed.

you left his words unanswered as you stood up from the cold concrete and held a hand in his direction to help him up. "come on, now. we're not dating, because i care so little about you, are we?"

jess rolled his eyes, before he followed you, of course ignoring your helping hand in the process.

you laughed at his tough act as he sent you a dark look, not finding anything about this remotely funny. he knew that this was one of your usual tactics to get him to talk. you would act understanding and worried about his injuries before he would be caught in a room alone with you, with no way to escape, having to explain every little detail about the fight.

well, tonight he decided, you were going to be caught in a room with him.

a smug smile slipped onto jess' features as he followed you up the stairs. you turned around and pushed a finger against your mouth, before you took out your keys and unlocked the door.

"grandpa is sleeping" you muttered, opening the door wide enough for jess to walk through, but not wide enough to reach the creaking sound.

jess and you had met the year before at the supermarket, where you had watched him buy a ridiculous amount of industrial glue, while he was busy watching rory and dean talk.

you had guessed that he had been doing that to bother them and while rory was a friend of yours, you had to admit that it had been a little funny.

unbeknownst to you, jess had forgotten everything about rory, once his eyes fell on you behind the counter.

"are you working on the worlds longest scrapbook or are you just very passionate about glue?"

"huh?" jess had been so stunned by what you said that he lost his usual cool demeanor and found himself at a temporary loss for words. he couldn't remember a situation in which he had not been able to reply with a witty joke.

"want me to repeat that?" you asked amused as you pulled the last bottle of glue over the scanner.

"no-uh" he shook his head "i'm jess, luke's nephew"

"oh" you smiled, a sign of recognition in your eyes "that's you!"

"and you are?" he held the ten dollar note in your direction.

you took the money, taking out his change in the process. "i'm y/n, taylor doose's—"

you were interrupted when the aforementioned man stepped next to you, a frown on his face at the sight of jess. "i'm her grandfather" he finished for you. "and you're gonna stay far away from her, you hear me, mariano?" he pressed.

"grandpa!" you scolded and jess was surprised at the sudden shame that entered taylor doose's face. it seemed like he really gave a damn about your opinion, unlike he did with anyone else in this town.

"well, i'm gonna check on miss patty and her plums" taylor excused quickly and walked away, before you could question him further.

"please don't mind him" you told jess, amusement evident on your lips "i just got back and he's been a little on edge without me here"

"where have you been?" jess asked, intrigued to hear more about the mysterious and pretty girl in front of him.

"my dad's" you replied with an uneasy smile. he recognized the expression on your face, had he always worn it himself when someone had asked him about his parents.

he decided not to stir the pot any more. "well, i'll see you around, doose" jess said, took his glue and left you standing with only a faint goodbye from your lips.

jess' hands went to squeeze your waist, as you closed the door.

you were luckily able to suppress any sound at the sudden touch and you could jess' smirk in your neck.

"very funny, mariano" you whispered, freeing yourself from his grip and turning around to let him see the annoyed expression on your face.

his eyes glistened with happiness in the dark of the hallway, before his hand went behind your back, bringing you closer to him. "why don't we go to your room?" he whispered.

you had to admit that for a short, misguided, second the sweetness of his words was not far away from undermining you.

you shook your head, snapping out of whatever had gone through your head at his tempting suggestion. "nice try" you smiled sarcastically and jess sighed, letting go of you and following behind you to the bathroom.

jess was no stranger to your rejection, especially when your grandfather was home, but he was not finished trying to (respectfully) lead you into temptation.

"there are two options how we can do this" you spoke, your voice in a normal volume as soon as jess had closed the door.

before you could explain his options, he interrupted you, the smirk now basically right in your face when you turned up the light and looked at him. "want me to lock the door?"

"no" you dragged. "you know why? because we are not doing anything forbidden"

"forbidden, huh?" jess smiled "kinda like the sound of that"

"this is not a rom-com"

"oh no" jess shook his head, wearing a faked stoic expression "of course not. just two people doing non-forbidden things in the bathroom" he shrugged.

"it sounds wrong when you say it like that"

"what does it sound like?" he stepped closer to you, ready to touch your lips with his, as his eyes fell close, but you were quicker, swerving around him, before he was able to even touch you.

"nah-ah!" you scolded.

"what?" jess turned around, now crossing his arms like you had done earlier "i'm just trying to kiss my girlfriend"

"not happening" you shrugged. "so, as i was trying to tell you before: you have two options: first, the easy one: let me fix your face and we're done in no time"

"or?" he furrowed his brows, leaning against the wall.

"or" you repeated "the hard one" jess' smile got impossibly bigger and you rolled your eyes "ew, not like you think"

"fine" he sighed. "the easy one i guess, no need to tell me about your torture method"

"it's not a torture method, but thanks for thinking so poorly of me" you muttered, before you opened the drawer under the sink, taking out the first aid kink.

you climbed on top of the counter and motioned for jess to come closer and stand in between your legs.

"well, this is kind of suggestive, don't you think?" he pinched your waist. you just shook your head, taking his hand and laying it on top of your knee instead.

"keep your hands there, mister" you directed, before you grabbed a wet cotton pad and pushed up his chin, so you could gently take the unnecessary blood off his face. "for your own good, i hope that the other started throwing punches"

"of course" jess nodded, overly dutiful, before he hissed in pain as the cotton pad touched one of the scars on his nose.

"you should've thought about that before you got into an unnecessary fight, you know?" you commented, switching out the pad, before you continued cleaning the other side of his face.

"yeah, yeah" he averted his eyes, his gaze falling onto the hem of your skirt, his fingers were laying on top of. he softly raised the fabric, pushing his hands to rest on your bare thigh.

"jess" you sighed in a warning tone.

"what? it's itchy"

"it isn't" you rolled your eyes, but didn't discuss the topic further as you threw away the pad.

you tried reaching behind you to grab one of the plasters from the first aid kit, but jess was quicker, snatching the box away from you and holding it behind his back with one hand.

"wha—"

"give me a kiss first" he prompted, smirking.

"jess" you whined, not amused at his antics.

"just one kiss, come on babe"

you reluctantly nodded. jess stepped closer, taking your chin into his hand and pulling your face closer so your lips could meet his.

his lips were warm and firm against yours, his teasing grin fading as the kiss deepened. what was meant to be a quick peck quickly turned into something more. his hand, which had been holding the first aid kit out of reach, dropped it to the floor as he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you closer.

you could feel the intensity growing between you two, the playful resistance dissolving into a surge of unexpected desire.

jess' other hand moved to the small of your back, guiding you even closer as the kiss became more urgent, more consuming.

when you finally broke apart, breathless and flushed, he looked at you with a glint in his eye. "was that so hard?" he teased, his voice a little huskier than before.

"oh, shut up" you muttered, flustered and lips swollen as a cause of the intensity of the kiss. you gently shoved his face back. "now pick up the first aid kit you dropped"

"yes, ma'am"

you shook your head, laughing to yourself as you watched him reach for the box on the ground behind him. it had clattered open, revealing it's contents to the ground beneath it.

he threw everything back in the box before he picked it up and came back to the counter to stand in front of you.

you took a few plasters, opening them up to stick them to the cuts on his face. "you look cute" you commented as soon as you were finished.

"i'm not cute" jess exclaimed with a stoic expression.

"you're always cute" you shrugged, now being the one to take his chin into your hands. "especially when you tell me who you fought—"

he didn't even let you finish the sentence, before he pushed his lips against yours once more. even tough it was a clear tactic to avoid your questioning, you didn't mind it this time (not that you did before, but you had to at least act like it) pulling him closer by the neck and deepening the kiss.

jess moaned into your mouth, and your lips broke into a smile. his hands were now inching closer up your thighs and a soft laugh broke from your lips when you had to catch your breath.

"let's go to your room" jess muttered, lips skipping over your neck.

"grandpa is home" you reminded.

"grandpa is asleep" he pointed out, brows moving up and down suggestively.

"jess" you giggled, as he grabbed your waist, setting you down on the floor and taking your hand to leave the bathroom, before even waiting for an answer.

well, you weren't open to any more protests then, as he took you up to your room. the only thought in your head was to stay quiet.

opposite to the rest of the night, the next morning was straight hellfire, as neither you or jess had taken the time to set an alarm.

so taylor doose entered your room without the slightest thought and watched in horror as a half-naked jess mariano climbed out of your bedroom window and fell rather awkwardly on the ground in front of it. probably right into your grandpa's rose bushes.

"i think i might be having a heart attack"

[seat-safety-switch]

Visiting the zoo is a lot of fun. You can see an elephant, you can see a rhinoceros, you can see a giraffe. All of these animals don't come from where I am, and through a process I don't like to think too much about, here they are, regardless.

I know lots of people don't like zoos, but if they came with me and experienced the same things I do, they would think otherwise. Those elephants are only bored if you are doing boring things. They're just like us. Imagine if you were stuck in your house, looking out the window all day long at folks wandering by and occasionally making fun of you. You'd be mad. At the very least, you'd be bored, which is worse than being mad. Now imagine some guy does a wheelie on a golf cart. Hey – that's exciting stuff.

Yes, the zoo is gonna say otherwise. They were perfectly happy with the way things have always been. When you're number one, why try harder, right? The reason why you try harder is because you care deeply about the intellectual needs and enrichment of these proud zoo animals. And also because once you pry the restrictor out of a Cub Cadet, and shift your weight just so, you can get those front wheels in the air terrifyingly easily. Sounds great, too, if you have the brains to cut a hole in the muffler first. Giraffes appreciate that, trust me.

So I'm telling you right now, folks in the jury. Do you want frothy, high-falutin' zookeepers to keep maintaining the status quo, or do you want to strike a blow for animal rights? I say we tell this judge that the case should be thrown right the fuck out, and then we can go ride dirt bikes in the parking lot, just in case there's any animals hiding in the bushes that could do with some entertainment. I am pretty sure I saw a possum out there this morning.

[vangbelsing]

One last thing about the Keep spoilers below the cut

I am more worried about the inquisitors portrayal than the lack of options. Like I wanted reactivity, but I get why it's not there, and while the absence of reactivity to my choices is regrettable, that absence doesn't contradict my world state, so to me that's livable. But the Inquisitor not having any options to tweak their personality at all?? Not even a general "were they more humorous or kind or violent" section??? That seems... Very much not promising. They seem so excited for people to see how they've portrayed the Inquisitor but... Y'all know people only care because it's their Inquisitor, right? Like there isn't some universal Inquisitor we all agree we love, we like ours. So the fact that there's absolutely no control over them? I. Am more than a little anxious over how they're gonna get handled.

[velvetwyrme]

doozi's undertale fic recs round THREE

As requested, here are EVEN MORE FIC RECS. This round is mostly reader inserts, with a dash of platonic and non-reader fics at the end.

As usual, this is really really long, so take your time and enjoy! Some of them are uhhhh, pretty spicy, so please make sure to check the warnings and tags and act accordingly.

Please tread carefully while reading, check tags, take breaks, drink water and HAVE FUN <3

The STATUS of each fic is labelled as such: Finished, Ongoing/Unfinished, Discontinued. (Unless the author specified that the fic is Discontinued, on Indefinite Hiatus, or otherwise abandoned the work, I will mark it as Ongoing/Unfinished. Oneshots are also marked as such.)

Spicy (Explicit) and/or Dark fics have also been labelled if relevant. (I won’t mark ones with just suggestive themes/moments, since I cant guarantee I’ll catch all of them. Similarly, unless there is consistent graphic death, gore, or otherwise prevalent upsetting topics, I [probably] won’t mark it as dark.)

MULTICHAPTERS

Ghost Hunting With Skeletons - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

ONE OF THE FICS OF ALL TIME!!!

Go "ghost hunting" with Cash while looking for machine parts! Become Sans' weird coworker! Lie and keep secrets with Red! Get tangled up with a mysterious shadowy figure who spontaneously spawns in your house- wait, what was that last one?

Tilikum - Various Sanses/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

I'm sure everyone and their dog knows of this fic by now but listen. If you haven't read this, somehow, please do yourself a favour and read this immediately.

I love mer fics and I especially love CEPHALOPOD SIRENS. (Blue and Red are very good in this fic but SKULL!!!! MY PRECIOUS BOY!!)

The Mirror Bay Depths - Various Sanses/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

And speaking of MER FIC- if you like merskeletons, mysteries, manipulation and mmmmmmmmmm...magical workarounds for linguistic difficulties (i made the alliteration work, see?) Then you'll LOVE this fic!

Dive into The Mirror Bay Depths and get charmed by a buncha mers! It's super cute and also has a serious undertone of "UH OH" once the mystery begins to come to light.

Got Crabs? - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Got crabs????? Hilarious soulmate AU where you and have some of the stupidest words written on each other's bodies and it all goes GREAT.

You do in fact, got crabs.

It's Just A Game - Sans/Reader - Finished

CYOAs my beloved. This was recced to me recently and I got caught up with all the new updates and it's sooooo good auugugjhfkgh,, I love existential crises and weird metafiction.

cat ~/.zsh_history - Sans/Reader - Finished

If you enjoyed It's Just A Game, or other fics like it, you'll probably like this too!!!! Player-character reality simulation existential angst all wrapped up into a neat little fic <3333 It feels like a weight on my heart.

The Understudy - Sans/Reader - Finished

THE anti-harem fic. As in, THE anti-harem fic that inspired the structure of every other anti-harem fic. It's a piece of fantastic storytelling and is a literal pioneer of a genre.

It was a fic that was intended to flip a genre on it's head, and it's fascinating to me that it became a genre of its own. Splendidly written and is the cause of 99% of my confusion during my return to the fandom because all of a sudden there were a buncha anti-harems and I was like WTF ARE THESE jkdhfgkjdfk,,

I went into it intending to find out the history behind anti-harems, and then got sucked in completely. You can guess the general premise, but MAN does plot hit hard!!!!!!

And speaking of anti-harems...

The Eye of a Judge - Various, Swapfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

What if anti-harem fic, except the terrible GF was EVEN MORE terrible. Really really fun concept with what happens to the reader, and oh so fucked up just in general. Make sure to check the tags on this one.

The Faults in Our Souls - W.D. Gaster/Reader - Finished

This fic is super sweet, the reader falls into the Underground and gets taken in by Gaster and his two boys, eventually falling in love and becoming a parental figure for the skelebros. But then the incident with the core happens...

Pros & Cons - Sans/Reader - Finished/Series

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

I try not to put too much NSFW in the lists on this blog but uhhhh *looks at the rest of the list* it's fine. I like these fics too much not to add them.

This one in particular is AMAZING and really funny to boot. The reader wakes up after a one night stand with very few memories of the night before and debates the pros and cons of checking who they slept with thsjfbbfkfbk

The fic right after is ALSO hilarious because it gives so much more context and life to the world I love it dearly. Also the smut is great but yknow gbflgbkf I'm TRYING to keep this relatively SFW

Eau de résistance - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

Underfell flavoured slave AU which gets really, really complicated emotions-wise. It's one of the few UT fics I still keep up with pretty actively atm, and it's because the mystery has me hooked. I NEED TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON.

Other than the obvious premise, it gets into some darker topics, so if you're sensitive to that sorta stuff, please read the tags and tread carefully if you decide to read! Otherwise, enjoy!

The Party Incident and Other Embarrassing Anecdotes - Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

Takes a deep breath. Ok so, I debated adding this fic. Not because I don't like it, but because I haven't actual read this in years, so I don't know how it stands up to the test of time.

I don't usually like adding fics that I can't certifiably recommend, but I also feel like if you haven't read this, you haven't Really experienced Undertale reader inserts. It's like. a classic.

I still remember vividly cringing from secondhand embarrassment SO many times while reading BUT I wouldn't trade in that experience for anything- I fucking loved this fic. It was wonderful and terrible and so incredibly fun, and honestly I kinda don't want to reread it so I can keep it in the shiny veneer of nostalgia forever.

Smells Like Chalk and a Cockatoo - Sans/Reader - Finished

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

Uhhhh, I don't actually have a good segue for this, but this one also has really complicated relationships. There is a happy ending! It's a fucking rollercoaster to get there though.

It's kinda in the same vein as The Party Incident for me, I consider it a classic, and it's also... very 2016/17. Take that how you will. I don't know if I'd recommend this fic, but I definitely think you should read it, if you know what I mean. I'm VERY fond of it despite my extremely conflicted emotions. It's definitely not for everyone though.

Oh, also it has the most fucked up form of skeleton reproduction ever <3 That's okay though, because it results in one of my favourite fankids ever. I'm love my boyyy Impact ;w;!!!!

Bonetrast - Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

The reader in this is terrible and I'm fascinated. I like reading about characters being antagonistic towards each other sometimes, so I really enjoyed this and I wanna see where the author takes this. Make sure to read the tags.

A Drink That Hits Right In the Bones - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

This one... the reader in this kinda sucks too jhsfjkdf but in a different way. Once again fascinating as hell!!! Drunk, gay, in denial and homophobic, this reader is NOT having a great time.

I, however, reading it, am having a fantastic time!

breakfast combo - Sans/Reader - Finished

Veryyyyyy cute! The reader gets bothered about their crush on Sans by UF!Sans. Love the banter. Oneshot turned twoshot, it's a nice little read :D

Penned to you - Horrortale!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Penpals!!! I'm loving this so far <3 Horrortale Pap and the reader become penpals and subsequently friends. Sans is... around, probably not being spooky and weird. I'm excited to see where this one goes >:00

Grounding Your Ego - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Soulmate AU again!!! The reader has a set of REALLY terrible words written around their neck, and... they're mute. :]

ALSO the little snippets of world building are so delicious and have stuck in my mind like the- wait fuck I just realised the title is a pun what the fuck how'd I miss that before- LIKE THE GROUNDS IN PAPYRUS' COFFEE.

The Sacrificial Skeleton and the Labyrinth of Gods - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

:] *points vigourously at the warning* The smut is a pretty ingrained part once it gets to it, but I couldn't NOT add this fic.

Anyway I'm a little obsessed with this fic. There's a skeleton reader, who's a necromancer! The skeletons are thought to be gods, but actually they got isekai'd! It's a WILD RIDE and it's surprisingly good??? It feels like one of those webtoons or manga that you look at the cover/summary for and go *??????* at, but then you start reading it and go "OH, THIS IS REALLY FUN ACTUALLY."

There's pretty intense language barriers between the skeletons and the reader for a lot of the fic, but I love that sorta stuff, so that just makes it better for me lol. I adore the dynamics between the characters, they feel so diametrically opposed sometimes it's great.

Nothing to see here. - Various/Reader, Various Sanscest - Ongoing/Unfinished

Oh this one!!! Should probably actually go under misc but it's okay. This fic asks the question of: What if there was a MASSIVE multiversal mashup and some of the residents shared an apartment building where they now live completely normal domestic lives?

It's got /Reader stuff as well as a fun selection of Sanscest and platonic roommate content, and each chapter is semi-self contained and really fun.

Magic Bitty Bits™ - Various/Reader, Various Sanscest - Ongoing/Unfinished

Another one that should technically be under misc. I love bitty fics... and I love really fucked up shit happening to characters <3 Take are to note the warnings at the beginning of chapters, but hhrhghh I'm on the edge of my seat every time something happens/is revealed. LIKE WHAT!! WHAT!!!!!!! AHH-

The Monster Who Will Always Wait - Nightmare!Sans - Finished

Small kraken mer becomes BIG KRAKEN MER!!!!!! Leviathan sized drama, with some sweet romance. I followed this one from the day it was posted to the day it finished and I loved every second.

Dire Wolf - Horror!Swapfell!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

You get two new coworkers, who have some unusual habits surrounding food, leading you to make them lunch!! As you grow closer, their histories and rivalries come to light. It's hella good and I love the character dynamics.

Uncomfortably Similar Situations - Horrortale!Sans/Reader - Finished

Horrortale!Sans brings you home like one would a starving stray cat. There are ups and downs but everything turns out alright :]!!

The Sound of the Sea - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

More mer content!!! But Underfell Sans this time ! There are only 3 chapters so far and it has me wanting more!! I love this so much...

Sweet Deceptions - Swapfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Fake dating!!!!! What more can I say ;D Well, I can say a lot more, like how fantastic this fic is with the escalation of the fake relationship, but I'll leave yall to find that out for yourselves :]

Dream Catcher, Nightmare Snatcher - Nightmare!Sans - Ongoing/Unfinished

HRHHGH Nightmare gets stuck in a Venom-esque situation with you, and you both suffer the consequences. You're both menaces to each other in this, it's great.

Coffee and Chaos - Underfell!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Reader ends up inheriting their mom's tenants, a pair of skeleton brothers. It's a nice slice of life!! Also, he/they reader ftw \o/!!

Canids love bones - Bad Sanses/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

In this, the reader is a monster with a really fluffy tail and a tragic past. They just keep getting bothered by these skeleton dudes and eventually end up joining them. Fun read! I like monster readers.

Train Station Blues - Mafiafell!Sans/Reader - Discontinued

Sadly discontinued :( Still a really solid fic and an enjoyable read!!! I adore the 1920s as a setting...

What is This, A Hallmark Movie? - Underswap!Papyrus/Reader - Finished

Christmas fic!! The reader does not like Christmas, and Stretch tries his best to get them to enjoy it regardless. It doesn't work out too well... but everything is alright in the end. I loved Stretch's determination jkfdhgkjdfg hes trying so hard...

Story of the perfect vessel - Various Sanses/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Really interesting premise!!! You're a parasite that took over this dying human's body and are now puppeteering it around. Then you meet a buncha skeletons, but you're still a parasite with no sense of what being human is like!! Love me some weird concepts.

America's Unluckiest (Luckiest) Almost-Astronomer - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Yaayyyy! You get isekai'd into a hot mess of a universe, brimming with skeletons, skeletons and more skeletons! There's some weird stuff going on, but surely it'll be fine.

All is Fair in Love and Prank Wars - Sans/Reader - Finished

Hey! Another 2016 fic! The reader starts a prank war with Sans. Gets angsty but everything gets better in the end. I really enjoyed it :> Reader is named in this, but for some reason that didn't bother me like it usually does lol

Mr. Fear - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Finished

This is an interesting one. It's set in a mashup of various AUs (e.g. Swapfell Alphys and Underfell Papyrus) but not in like. a multiversal machine malfunction sorta deal. Anyway, it's got a fun plot and I really enjoyed it :]

Cheshire Kitten - Underswap!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

The reader is a shapeshifter who prefers to be a cat! (Mood) And they use that to deal with problems large and small. It's real sweet and makes me also want to be able to turn into a shapeshifting cat.

it's just me and an overly enthusiastic skeleton; trying to solve a murder. - Underswap!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Ah, I love ridiculously long titles. Saves me time. The title also acts as a summary, and it's really fun!! Monster murders must be horrible to make a case for, since you can't inspect the body for evidence...

Ship of bones - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

PIRATES!!!!! I love the action and drama in this one, it's so fun! Also features a lot of scary skeletons. I loved reading about the reader giving them the slip >:3c!!

A Sea of Hope - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

MORE pirates!! This one features a skeleton reader <33 I love the backstory and lore... also the reader is so teeny compared to Axe :DDD

You Know Where To Find Me - Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

I am so invested in this premise (Papyrus is the mascot of monsterkind and you are his assistant) and both of you are tired after having a string of terrible employers/employees kjhkjdfg,, I'm so excited to see where this goes, it's been fun so far.

=========================

ONESHOTS

Seeing Double - Swapfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

Twin shenanigans. TWIN SHENANIGANS AT COFFEE SHOPS! I can't say more without spoiling things so just go read it!!! Reader(s) are named but moreso for Twin purposes.

Somethin' Special - Underswap!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

More coffee shop AU! Very cute. SO cute. They're both awkward and silly and its SO sweet.

Daguerreologue - Sans/Reader, Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot/Series

Actually a oneshot that's part of a series, but I just liked this one the most (you should also go read the rest of the series, it's really good too!!!)

Feels like a little snapshot of a soft, warm life, worn by time. It's just a really nice fic! Good for feelin fuzzy inside.

Looking for Something - Sans/Reader - Oneshot

The reader loves to people watch, and draw the people they see. Some of which, are monsters ;)! Superrrrrrrrrr cute. Suuuuuuuuuper super cute.

FIGHT ME!! - Sans/Reader - Oneshot

Not to be mistaken for Fight Me! by MsMK or Fight Me! by Little_old_lady (both of which are very good!!!!!!!) This fic DOES however use the same basic premise/prompt except with Sans as the nurse and it's SIMILARLY fantastic. I love nurse Sans in this.

If yall know of more UT fics with this title/concept please tell me so I can make this stupid joke a third time.

Dates are dumb - Sans/Reader - Oneshot

Sans has a really bad blind date, but his server comes to the rescue!! Really cute!

This was supposed to be smut, idk what happened. - Swapfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

As the title says, notably not smut. Sexy and very charged? Absolutely.

It's a soulmate AU where the reader is a mob boss making a trade of sorts with their rival, Sans. He shows off the goods before the trade is accepted.

Light of My Life - Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

Very sweet!! The reader has magic that allows them to hear magic, and they let Papyrus listen in.

and i will love you on purpose - Horrortale!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

As you've probably noticed, 99% of the oneshots I rec here are super cute, and this is no exception djkfgkjgfh 5+1 of kissing Horror, it's bitesized and adorable.

Stargazing - Sans/Reader - Oneshot

A little slice of happiness set before the barrier went up. Sans and the reader are kids and it's very very sweet.

It's Raining Right Here (They/Them Edition) - Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

Veryyyy cute snapshot of romance with Papyrus <3!!!!

General Misconception - Megalosomnia!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

I love the Megalosomnia AU and I also love Papyrus. This has both :] I won't spoil things, but General just wants to be helpful :))

And speaking of Megalosomnia...

Delirious - Megalosomnia - Dr. Baggs/Reader - Oneshot

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

>:3c I usually try avoid too much explicit content for these lists but listennnnnnnn I love good and fun characterisation MORE than any conviction I have to that, plus I've broken that rule already.

Anyway senseless justification aside, I freakin loveeeee how much characterisation gets packed in here, it's delicious!! You get to know so much about the dynamics and workings of the relationships in this universe it's great.

Relearning - Ink!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

The reader breaks her arm and has to relearn how to draw. Cue Ink! It's really sweet!!

Turn The Page - Swapfell!Skelebros/Reader - Oneshot

This one is actually part of a series but I just really like this one hjsdfgjhf,, I love festivals and markets!! The reader is so awkward and jumpy and I'm like. ah. a kindred spirit.

Meet Cute Oneshots - Various - Oneshot/Series

Cheating again by linking a series. As the title implies, it's a bunch of meet cutes!! My favorites (as of writing) are the second, fourth and fifth in the series ^^!!

the thing about axe - Horrortale!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

You go for a nice walk in the woods with Axe :) I love how it this one plays with emotions and atmosphere for the audience, because the reader (character) is mostly oblivious to Axe's history.

hottie hotline - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

Really sweet and funny. Red gets stuck in an elevator. THE FUCKING ENDING GOT ME. HRHFKFJFKDNDK

A Conversation Starter - Swapfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

First times for both of them! A snapshot of these two stumbling through a conversation with a human/monster for the first time. It's adorable.

Soulmate of the Century - Nightmare!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

Soulmate AU where you can't harm your soulmate. You really just wanted some ramen, man.

Kabedon - Swapfell!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

Kabedon the skeleton!!! Razzy doesn't get the appeal, so you explain it to him ;))

Cuddles of Doom - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

DOOMYYYYY!!! I love the dialogue here. Doomy is the most precious kitty ever and Papyrus is very cute.

Café - Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

Short and sweet!! (Lightly) tsundere Papyrus is very cute dfjkghkfjg <3

A Blue Valentine - Underswap!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

It's Valentines, and you're crushin'~ Both of them are soooooooo sweet in this.

You'd Be Goo Where You Stand - Sans/Reader - Oneshot

True to the title I am goo where I stand. I'm all gooey and gushy it's so cuteeeeeeeeeeeeee. THEY'RE MARRIIIIIEDDDD,,,,, and there's a sequel??? SO cute.

First Meeting - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

UF!Papyrus is a very worried parent and the reader is sweet as hell. I just think there's also something really funny about Papyrus calling Frisk a SLIPPERY SNAKE jkdhfjghfdg

=========================

MISC. / OTHER

Full Deck - ? - Ongoing/Unfinished

Hysterical flip of every reader insert ever written. Can be simply summed up as "skeletons desperately dodging various reader's advances", but that is nowhere near close to describing this fic. It's really funny, and if you haven't read it, you should.

Not quite a /reader, so it goes here lolol. The reader is more something that happens to the skeletons.

No fin new about it - Bad Sanses||Nightmare's Gang&Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

SUBNAUTICA AU!! With timeline fuckery! I just like big mer skeletons. And Subnautica. It's a real fun time.

Bits Of Spaghetti - Various&Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

This fic treats bitties in a really interesting way!! Veryyy cool origins, and very interesting dynamics between characters. Reader is an old man, and he just kinda wants to make puppets and dolls and have a nice quiet life. Unfortunately, skeletons.

Don't give up, Y/n! - Various&Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

I do not have any kids but this fic makes me feel like a worried parent. It also makes me feel like I need to smoke an entire pack of cigarettes. It's great, really. Just makes me so stressed. They're just a kid... definitely heed the tags for this one.

Down The Mountain, Under The Door - Underswap!Papyrus&Reader - Oneshot

Monsters are giant sized !! Or humans are tiny. Either way, Underswap Papyrus comforts the reader after accidentally spooking them pretty badly. I love myself some good ol' unintentional fearplay and intentional comfort.

The Bucket List - Various&Reader - Finished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

Hoo boy. The reader creates a bucket list, intending to die at the end. It's story about depression and recovery and it's really really good.

Heart on the Table - Ongoing/Unfinished

MADE ME CRYYY,,, Sans and Pap end up taking care of Frisk and honestly just go read it it's very sweet and sad and good. Frisk is just a kid!!!!!! AHHH

Broken Bones (and Sticks and Stones) - Finished

CRIES!!!!!! You know Handplates AU. I know Handplates AU. Featuring: extremely complex familial feelings!!!! Papyrus has a kid, and she is the SWEETEST. Another of my favorite fankids!! FLORAAAAAA <33

This of course, with Gaster being Gaster in this AU, makes everything even more complicated. It's really good and made me cry. Please read it. Papyrus is the best mom.

Jamais Vu - Oneshot

HGH... this one is like a punch to the gut but in a really good way. Both because of the absolutely incredible writing and also because it was the first Undertale fic that this author has posted since 2017, and gave me a scare when I opened my email.

Letters to a Friend - Oneshot

Another by the same author, but from 2016. My HEART?????? The King Papyrus ending always hurts me so... hhhrhhhhghjkdf,,

OH, I WAS BEING SARCASTIC - Finished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

It's more Papyrus Angst! This is just going to happen every time I do one of these, probably.

He would never take a vacation for any reason...

Sonata - Finished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

More Papyrus Angst. Sometimes a melody can say more than words.

Broken Trust (Re-upload) - Finished

What's this!! Even more angst?! You bet! It's Swap flavoured this time though.

Sans is not actually a monster, and Papyrus is horrified when he finds out. Very very good and sad, with a happy ending. Paps is not great in this, but he comes around :( I really really love the concept of this fic, and I think it was executed really well.

I'm Feeling Fine, Kid - Finished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

Soooooooooooo fucked up but it's also like. one of the formative fics of my existence. I could've sworn this was in one of my other lists, but apparently not. Fucked me up big time back when I first read it sdjkhjhf, read this if you wanna hurt and then get tentatively put back together.

If you've read Flowey Is Not A Good Life Coach and you liked that, you might like this too. Lots of Papyrus Angst, but this one has even more Sans Angst!

Stones and a Glass House - Oneshot

[Warning: Contains Discussions of Explicit Content.]

Want a break from the sudden deluge of angst??? Try this, it's kinda a crackfic, and very funny.

Love when brothers get to tease each other mercilessly. They talk pretty candidly about explicit content, so heed the warning LMAO. Very very funny though.

=========================

SANSCEST/PAPCEST

AH SURPRISE! I didn't want to make a whole new list since I have way less of these on hand, but I also really wanted to recommend them lol. If this ain't your thing, then this list ends here -u-)b

fox in the coop - Sanscest (Dust/Horror/Crop) - Ongoing/Unfinished

Ouuuhhhhh I am so unwell over this fic. It hurts so good. Hidden identity bullshit to the max!! I don't even know where to begin with this one, but it's fantastic, go read the summary at least. Dust is so normal about everything. Totally.

Also, Dust gets chickens!!

Colors - Papcest (Spicyhoney || Underfell!Papyrus/Underswap!Papyrus) - Ongoing/Unfinished

Ahhhhh language barriers my beloved. Falling in love despite language barriers my beloved!!!

It's got some real good drama and lovely lovely writing. I love it a whole lot :]]

VILLAIN HOTLINE - Sanscest (Bad Sans Poly) - Ongoing/Unfinished

Bad Sans Chatfic. Wait wait wait hear me out!!! COME BACK. THERES AN ACTUAL STORY.

The chatfic parts are pretty fun, and the developing horror plot even more so! Universes and people are glitching, which spells a bad time for everyone!!!

You Have One (1) Unread Message - Sanscest (Bad Sans Poly) - Ongoing/Unfinished

Similar to the one above, this fic has a similar concept (crack chatfic that devolves into plot and horror)

Genuinely quite terrifying, even when viewed through Killer's strange apathetic POV (which is ALSO fascinating in it's own right).

Little (NOT LITTLE) Red Riding Hood - Papcest (Spicyhoney) - Finished

Really fun twist on Little Red Riding Hood!! Red also gets to wear a frilly nightcap and nightgown in this, which is a fun image.

So You Didn't Want to Marry a Mage - Papcest (Spicyhoney + BG. Mapleblossom) - Ongoing/Unfinished

Ahhh I love fics where a character gets to learn magic from another character... this one is hella cute!!! I love a lot of this author's works but this one in particular is one of my favourites :>

=========================

Did you have fun scrolling forever? I had fun putting this together.

There are a total of 90 fics here! I wanted to do 99 since it's the 999999999th anniversary of Undertale this year, but I'm tired so 90 will do. That's already so many. 90 in fact. Also my phone started to lag while scrolling so perhaps it's for the best.

If yall have any recs for ME, please drop them by my askbox, I (obviously) love reading jkshdgjkfh,,, I'm generally up for rereading stuff, so dw if you reckon I've read something before :]!!

Also, if you haven't already, you should check out my FIC REC MASTERLIST for previous (and future) fic rec lists (from me, specifically).

[txttletale]

thoughts on duskmourn so far

i like it :) it's not as good as bloomburrow but also i'm not sure anything is. i think duskmourn suffers from the fact that imo it is quite mechanically unclear and murky -- the problem with leaning so heavily into flavouring abilities and putting such a big focus on their fiction 'e.g. unlocking rooms' is that when something doesn't match it's really noticeable. manifest dread plays okay but the name is really clunky and awkward when 'cloak' was three sets ago, the rooms feel stretched to breaking point--some of their effects just seem so detached from their flavour and speaking of the flavour there's a lot of very dubious rooms. what the fuck is a 'weight room' or a 'mirror room'.

also and this is a comparatively minor thing but it's been driving me crazy: the 'fear of' creatures are really bad because similar to rooms i think they ran out of real fears. some of them are like 'fear of falling' 'fear of isolation' 'fear of the dark' and it's like okay. those are real fears. 'fear of missing out' makes me cringeand is also stupid, despite the word 'fear' being in FOMO it's obviously not a fear in the horror movie sense! what the fuck is a FOMO elemental going to do, go out with your friends on a night you're busy? silly. but the one that gets me the most is 'fear of burning alive'. that's not a fucking fear guys. or like it is but it's not a distinct and personal fear like 'abduction' or 'infinity' or even 'losing teeth' -- everyone's fuckling afraid of burning alive, that's normal! 'fear of fire' would have made sense but 'fear of burning alive' might as well be 'fear of being killed to death horribly'.

that said i do love the aesthetics i love the beasties and overlords especially they are all killer designs. i like introducing modern technology levels and aesthetics to mtg i think it's badass i would take a million more ostentatiously 80s themed sets over seeing one more Fucking elf on a card ever again. i am mixed on the overt references which are sometimes very fun and cute and sometimes just feel too 'rejected player one theme song' but i really love the stupid tropey stuff that plays with the tropes and aesthetics without just being a specific movie, lke 'meathook massacre 2'. i like the level of commitment and the number of cards that feel like cheesy stupid horror movie monsters. i l;ove the card art gimmick where some printings have a Scary Getter. like it just commits hard enough to the dumb genre shit to sell it to me

anyway overall it's a good set and leaps ahead of the fucking awful OTJ and MKM but it's still a step down from bloomburrow. oh bloomburrow my beloved

[twoduelsabers]

mistakes of an apprentice

the ask -> hey there! could i request a fic...you're badly hurt and qimir in disguise finds you. as injured as you are you just beg him not to tell your master, fearful of what he will do to such a weak pupil. qimir corrects your assumptions.

content warnings -> description of injuries, canon typical violence

it was almost impossible to stay out of sight on nar shaddaa. especially while leaving a trail of blood after every step. the only thing she could use to hide were the narrow alleys across the city, and even they weren't nearly as empty as they should be.

staying focused was difficult, when the reminder of her failure made walking difficult. there wouldn't be an issue if the guards were equipped with blasters only. instead, they carried fucking swords, and the one she was ordered to kill wielded a lightsaber, probably bought on the black market. of course, they weren't a match for her, but she heavily underestimated the seriousness of the situation. and now she paid the price- a cut in the side of her stomach, too deep for her liking.

she cursed under her breath. she was a sith. or, at least she tried to be one. with her potential, even a dozen of armed men shouldn't be an obstacle.

a cough escaped her throat, and she shivered. she could barely walk, and if her master found out just how weak she was... he trained her to defend herself. to attack. to kill. he can't see that she won, but barely.

yet, he probably will. one way or another. qimir might pass on what he was about to see- her vulnerable, wounded state. still, she prayed that he wouldn't.

it took her a few more turns and a worrying amount of effort to get to the ship. it stood in a very old, suspiciously looking dock, but she didn't bother with finding a more dignified place. it was supposed to be an "in-and-out" job.

first thing she was greeted with was qimir rushing to her side.

"finally!" he voiced in an accusing tone. "did you have fun? you know, i waited here for hours...and worried." he sent her a cheeky smile.

as much as his banter might have been funny at times, this was definitely not one of them. and he seemed to realise that rather quickly.

"are you...okay?"

she shut her eyes tightly and exhaled. her side burned like fire, and she was exhausted.

"it's just a- scratch." her voice was strained, and in opposition to her own words, her knees almost gave out.

qimir was quick to catch her. his brows furrowed, as he tried to hold her up. his usual, clumsy demeanor was replaced by seriousness.

"you're hurt." he stated, seating her down on the ground, and leaning her back on the wall. "where?"

he tried to uncover her cloak, but she grabbed his wrist instantly, stopping him in place.

"qimir." his name fell out of her lips, sounding like a plea. "don't tell my master. you hear me?"

he tilted his head in confusion.

"please. please! he will think i'm weak. it doesn't matter i killed that man. that i killed- i killed them all." her voice wavered. "all he will see is that i got injured- badly injured. he trained me so i would be able to handle myself, but turns out i- i can't."

the dock they were in was empty, and she thanked the maker for that. she thanked the maker for the shadows that hopefully covered her teary eyes.

if her master decided she is, in fact, too weak, he'd disown her, in the best case scenario. she'd never see qimir again.

or he'd kill her.

both of these options weighted heavy on her shoulders. she couldn't even bring herself to look at qimir.

he called out her name quietly, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"we need to take care of this. now." he urged, yanking his wrist away from her grasp.

"qimir, please." she uttered, desperate, exhausted and in pain. "he'll throw me away."

qimir froze, clenching his jaw. did she really think he'd get rid of her, just like that? today was the first solo mission he assigned her with, and force, she completed it! he knew he wasn't the one to show affection whilst underneath the mask- but he tried to make up for it when he was just qimir. when he was her guide and supplier. he wanted to make up for that.

but of course, she had no clue.

and now, she was in front of him, wounded and barely conscious.

he needed to make her understand.

"take that cloak off. i'm not asking." qimir said firmly, as he usually would during training.

her eyes widened at the sudden change of attitude. his voice sounded different from how it usually was. there was something behind it- something she couldn't quite place.

yet she obliged, shrugging the fabric off of her shoulders, wincing. she revealed the injury, shifting a little to the side. her robes were already damp and colored with dark crimson.

qimir didn't say a word, and his expression was unreadable, yet laced with worry. he seemed to be contemplating something.

"stay still." he commanded quietly.

he moved one of his hands to rest atop of her wound.

"what are you doing-?" she hissed. the pain certainly didn't get any better from the pressure.

once again, he remained silent. he focused, steadying his breath, and letting his energy flow through his extended arm.

she felt the burn dissolving, and she wondered if qimir finally used his potion-making skills...

"what are you do-" she started, but he cut her off.

"there."

what has he done? she peered down carefully, expecting to see the injury but-

there was nothing there. her skin was untouched.

in one terrifying second, she had realised that qimir had healed her. force-healed her.

it could mean only one thing, and the thought alone made her stomach twist in fear.

"master." was all she could utter.

qimir gaze was different now. his force signature shifted to a dark and heavy, familiar one.

"you did well today, acolyte."

he said calmly, as if nothing happened.

"master- i-i'm so sorry-" uncertainty gnawed at her. what could all of this mean for her? for them?

"you should rest." qimir's voice was gentle, so different from what he sounded like from under the mask.

as he stood up, he extended his hand towards her.

she stared at it dumbly for a moment, then hesitantly let him pull her up, to his side.

to his side, where she belonged.

now, she was certain of it.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

Another castle house. I can't believe there are so many. The Castle of Joy was built in 2004 in Murphy, NC. 3bds, 4ba, and has a pending sale. Listed for $975k (Zestimate: $916,700). I didn't recognize the house, but I recognized the land- I posted it before. I think that the sale fell thru.

Not very castle-like. No grand entrance and a living room/kitchen combo.

Kitchen's not too bad, but it's a little dated. There's the primary bedroom visible right off the kitchen, and stairs to the lower level.

The primary has a faux finish on the walls, with doors to the porch.

The en-suite is a standard 3 pc.

This bedroom also has faux finished walls and a small en-suite, plus doors to the porch.

Here's the porch.

There's a hot tub under the open "turret" roof.

Stairs to an upper level.

They have a pool room.

At the end of this hallway there's a bathroom.

And, then there's a fun bunk style bedroom for kids.

Then, the hall leads into this very interesting space.

There are 2 table-for-two cubbies that kind of look like they were closets, previously.

And, there's another pool room off to the left. I really think that was a bedroom w/a sitting room.

And, a storage room w/an extra fireplace.

An outdoor foyer gate opens to the garden.

They have a party barn. It can be rented out as a wedding venue.

I'm guessin' this is where the couple and the officiante stand.

Heart-shaped pond.

There's a guest parking area.

Wow, do those chairs come w/the house or are they rentals?

The venue space is apart from the home.

10.67 acres of land.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/150-Castle-Ct-Murphy-NC-28906/230500742_zpid/

[gemini-atz]

Seonghwa as your Boyfriend₊˚⊹♡

('Realistic Imagines' + Astrology Based)

Background/Disclaimer: !!This is all my own interpretation based on my personal astrology knowledge and research. I consider myself an amateur!!

✩Gemini Notes✩ IDK what happened but I ended up getting really into writing the NSFW part of this and it got long so I'm making a part 2 for it which I'll post tomorrow night! I'll create a link at the end of this post and in my Astrology Series Pinned post. If you'd like a tag please comment!

SEONGHWA SUN Aries MOON Cancer MERCURY Aries VENUS Aquarius MARS Aries

Dating Seonghwa is pretty much like being with your best friend. He's such a caretaker and protector in your life almost from the moment he enters it. You guys probably had a base of friendship for a bit before you started dating, and it would have probably (definitely) been you crushing on Seonghwa hard first before he even notices his own feelings for you.

Aquarius Venus and really anyone with their Venus in an Air sign tend to seek intellectual or stimulating connections with people before falling romantically. For Seonghwa his partner should be someone he also considers a close friend. He'd be like the guy you'd meet in your second year of college in class because you were put in a group for an assignment and of COURSE you two turned out to be the only two that even gave a shit and tried. Showing a sincere interest in his hobbies or likes would really endear him to you, and he would try to return the favor by getting into yours. For Seonghwa, a comfortable kind of friends to lovers thing is ideal. He loves spending quality time with you but his idea of quality time is very much giving parallel play, where you both do your own thing in the same room, maybe listening to a playlist you made together. With his three Aries placements, he has the potential to have a really explosive temper. It's a little diminished by his Moon in Cancer but he's probably the type of guy who holds in all his annoyances until he can just get them out at the end of the day either through his hobbies or physical activity. Basically, he likes to keep his mind focused and his hands busy. Air Venus signs can come off as aloof occasionally to other passionate signs who literally want to be with you all the time. He's the kind of boyfriend that will give you some space if you need it, because he'll need it too. You'll be soooo tempted to go an interrupt him when he's focused on his Legos because he's just so beautiful and cute when he's focusing but the thing he loves about you is how much understanding you always give him; its all you can do to just kiss his forehead and go to read a book while laying on the couch. Eventually he'd come over to you, bouncy and energized and flop onto the couch, wiggling up to rest his face into your chest and wrapping warm, solid arms around you. "Can I show you the set I just built?" He'd ask, and of course you say yes! His eyes get so sparkly while he shows it off to you, smiling so proudly at your reactions. If you're a person who loves being spontaneous or adventurous with your plans, having Seonghwa as your boyfriend means you two will genuinely have a lot of fun together. He's the boyfriend that wants genuinely does want to go to art museums and fashion archive exhibits with you, and you guys can chat excitably about your opinions of different works, be it games, anime, fashion or music. As a couple, you are always ready to try something new and probably always have weekend plans.

As a Cancer Moon Seonghwa might gravitate toward the caretaker role in your relationship and tends to anticipate your own needs before you do, just doing little actions to look after you, like preparing your coffee or tea in the morning while you rush around getting ready for work. He isn't super big on PDA, maybe holding hands in public is as much as he's comfortable with but once you're alone....he's your personal giant teddy bear. So many hugs, so many cuddle sessions where you both play on your Switches and pause occasionally to show each other something cool or cute in your game.

You'll end up thinking its funny that some people have the impression your boyfriend is quiet or shy; If he's not saying anything, he just might not be interested in the conversation. Once you get him talking about his interests he's a certified YAPPER. And, surprisingly one of the most stubborn people you have ever met. Like, good luck feeling like you can ever "win" an argument. With both a Sun and Mars in Aries, Seonghwa feels like he can give you energy just from being near him. Aries men tend to have a lot of physical stamina and can push themselves pretty far in that aspect.

Which brings me to my next point......

NSFW

I see Seonghwa as someone who eventually gets into orgasm denial on his partner because of just how long he can go for. That Aries stamina feels like he's the type who can cum and be ready to go again faster than you were expecting.

Read More

[getvalentined]

I mentioned this elsewhere but I can get into more detail about it here: one of my favorite things to do when writing fic for a series that isn't placed on some AU version of Earth is to use legitimate but archaic or obsolete terms for things: "dioxidane" instead of hydrogen peroxide, "bhanga" instead of marijuana, "shellshock" instead of PTSD, and so on. I think it gives the work a more realistic air while also solidifying the setting as being somewhere else, and still being something that a reader can look up if necessary.

Also a huge fan of repurposing common idioms for the fictional setting in question. I play in FF7, and these are a few of my favorites:

In for a penny, in for a pound → In for a gil, in for a grand

Rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic → Washing windows in Midgar at Meteorfall

A bull in a china shop → A grandhorn in a glass boutique

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth → Don't look a gift bird in the beak

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, that's why I [verb] on company time → Boss makes a fortune, I make a gil, that's why I [verb] while I'm paying the bills

Cold as a witch's tit → Chilly as Shiva's armpit

Hung like a horse → Built like a behemoth

If wishes were horses beggars would ride → If wishes were chocobos beggars would fly

Idioms catch on because there's a particular flow and rhythm to them, so you can't always just swap out a word and expect it to work—you can't just plug in "chocobo" everywhere common turns of phrase use "horse," for instance, because the extra syllables throw off the flow and make the phrase awkward to say. You gotta figure out the pattern in the idiom, where the emphasis hits, etc., and then rework that to work in-universe.

Stuff like this is very silly, but it really makes a difference to me with regard to readability and suspension of disbelief, so I really enjoy doing it in my own work, and it's always fun to see it in someone else's!

[faeruy]

One of the things I'm loving about Agatha All Along (among many, many things) is Lilia's sudden outbursts involving tarot. So far we've had two cards mentioned, and I kinda wanted to analyze how they're being used. Note; I'm fully just an amateur hobbyiest when it comes to tarot, I mostly use it as a backdrop to my homebrew D&D campaign cause I enjoy the symbology of it, so I may get things wrong.

So first up -

Three of Pentacles - This one is triggered when Lilia sees the 'Three Star' on her eviction notice and she writes down the names of the rest of the coven. This one is pretty straightforward - at its most basic Three of Pentacles represents teamwork. Kinda important when you're forming a coven. It emphasizes collaboration and shared goals, all the things Agatha is going to need to survive the Road.

What I find interesting is that the Reverse reading is equally important; lack of cohesion, conflict, poor motivation, and ego are all part of the Three of Pentacles Reversed. They are also very much Agatha's flaws, and her current predicament is a direct result of those flaws.

So all in all, it's use in Agatha All Along is pretty straightforward; Agatha needs a team, they need to collaborate and work together. They, especially Agatha, need to be wary of ego, selfishness and disharmony, or they will fail.

The High Priestess - This one is triggered the first time Lilia meets Jennifer Kale. This one is waaay more interesting in what it means, IMO. In it's upright position, the High Priestess invokes intuition, sacred knowledge, and the subconscious mind. It speaks of femininity, although maybe not quite as strongly as the Empress. It makes sense for Jen; she's the most overtly feminine of the witches, wearing soft, light pink when Lilia meets her. Her speciality is Potions, which speaks to having a good deal of specialized knowledge.

However, this is a case where on first glance, the Reverse is actually stronger in Jen. The High Priestess Reverse is all about the disconnect from intuition, withdrawal, and repression. Like a witch who has been disconnected from her magic because she's been bound. It's no wonder that Lilia pegged her as The High Priestess immediately, since she seems to represent at least parts of both aspects.

What's really interesting though is what we see in the third episode. It's a trial, especially tailored for Jen, and we see just how fully she represents The High Priestess. Her self-doubt, caused by the disconnect from her magic, is STRONG, because she doesn't trust the intuition and knowledge that still exist within her. They only survive when she starts to trust herself again. There's also kind of a neat detail about the fact that they all hallucinate - bringing their subconscious to the surface - which is just another facet of the High Priestess.

One other fun thing; I very much doubt this was intentional, but The High Priestess is 2 of the Major Arcana, which makes it the 3rd card (since The Fool is 0). This is the 3rd episode of Agatha All Along, but since the first 2 were shown together, this is the 2nd night of aired shows. I just think it's a fun connection.

It does suggest that the show is using the cards to do some decent foreshadowing. For sure at the end of the 2nd episode, I assumed that the reading wasn't that deep, and for the Three of Pentacles, it may not be. But after the third episode and the way Jen's connection to the card grew stronger, I'm more interested to see what other cards will be mentioned and what role they'll play in the show. I know Lilia is holding The Tower in one of the promo posters, and I can't wait to see if that ties into Lilia personally, or if it's just part of the general theme of the show. It could go either way - The Tower represents chaos, and one of the working subtitles of the show was Coven of Chaos, so it's possibly just a reference to that.

[sp-by-april]

april what do you think the each of the guy’s favorite move is when receiving a bj? like what is just an INSTANT nut when you do it?

i ask this because i tried something new on a guy the other day and he came so fast it was actually really fucking funny and then it made me think up this hc prompt LMFAO

I might expand on this a little later because I feel like favorite moves and instant nut are really two separate genres! Also yes, they all like enthusiasm and eye contact so we're gonna ignore the obvious.

Anyway, I'm gonna start with Stan because I AM SO CONFIDENT ABOUT THIS, YOU GUYS.

STAN 💙 Okay so like, obviously the longer you're blowing a guy, the more intense it gets, the more sensitive he gets etc etc... Stan is very, very easy to overstim. Sure, but what's that mean if you wanna make him cum hard and fast?

💙 So you're gonna want to finish him with your hand -- WAIT WAIT, Are you still with me? Okay, good! Stroke him, tell him how hot he is, how badly you want him to come for you and hold his hand with your other hand while you look up at him adoringly.

💙 Bonus side effect: Any time he thinks about it, his knees will get instantly weak.

KENNY 🧡 Kenny is a huge fan of the gluck-gluck porn style blowjob. Make a huuuuge production of it.

🧡 Take him to the back of your throat, where the thickest, stickiest saliva is. Once he's good and coated in it -- swallow. The one two punch of your spit getting sucked away and the contraction is gonna drive him nuts.

🧡 "Okay, that sounds fun but not instant nut territory," Yeah, yeah, I hear you. Prostate massage. You're welcome.

KYLE 💚 He will PUT YOU THROUGH IT. Facefucking, hair pulling, the whole nine yards.

💚 That said, he truly is happy and feels lucky you'd put your mouth anywhere near him. He will still make you work for it, though. I HATE HIM

💚 I hope you are a good multitasker. Run your tongue in tight little circles over his frenulum while you're bobbing on him. Not too fast and not too slow either, timing is a key factor here... but hey, practice makes perfect. 🤭

ERIC 💔 I had to consult the oracles because Eric is not my cup of tea. (& I wouldn't be his either, lmao, I know what I am)

💔 Anyway, they told me to play with his balls. Any kind of testicular stimulation will send him into the stratosphere.

Okay, I have armed you with the knowledge, now go put it to good use! And remember...