#and i work a 15 hour starting a 4am...

[thevoidstaredback]

The plan was set and the game had begun.

There was a meeting on the Watchtower exactly three days after the Bat Clan had decided to mess with the Justice League, so that's when they planned to set everything in motion.

Robin couldn't be at the meeting because it fell during school hours, so Nightwing had come to the meeting with Batman. He'd already had the day off, so it wasn't too much of a hasel. Red Hood and Red Robin had both wanted to come, but they also had civilian duties to take care of.

When the meeting was over, the 'main leaguers', as many others had dubbed them, stayed behind as they always did. Normally, it was just so they all could catch up, sometimes to arrange another meeting, or even to discuss more sensitive topics.

This time, when everyone but Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Green Arrow, Green Lantern, The Flash, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, Cyborg, and Nightwing had left the room, Nightwing threw his arm across Batman's shoulders and said "You all should come to the Cave!"

All conversation stopped as everyone turned to look at the black and blue clad vigilante. For a long moment, no one spoke or moved. Then, Batman nodded.

"Perfect!" Nightwing's smile got even bigger.

"Um," Superman, the sweet midwesterner, flicked his eyes over to Batman's face before looking at Nightwing. "Are you sure? Bat's has never let any of us into Gotham, let alone the Bat Cave."

Nightwing winked at the hero, his domino mask not hiding it, "Yeah, well, me and the others managed to wear him down. Besides, we've all wanted to give you guys a tour! We've been to all your secret hideouts, so we figured it's about time you saw ours!"

"I'm sorry," Green Lantern raised his hand slightly, "'Others'?"

Nightwing blinked, his smile dropping. Batman straightened up. "Did you-" Nightwing cut himself off, "You do know how many of us there are in Gotham, right?"

The heroes all looked at one another. Sure, they'd heard that there was two, maybe three, working with Batman, but nothing had ever been confirmed aside from Robin working with Batman and Nightwing working in Bludhaven.

Batman fought very hard to keep a smirk off his face. Nightwing didn't even try to hide his amusement.

Wonder Woman was the one to ask, "There are rumors, but I can't say any of us know exactly how many heroes work within Gotham City limits."

Nightwing and Batman shared a glance. This added so much more to their game. They had to tell the others! This was already so much fun, but it was about to get so much better!

"Then, I guess you all have no choice but to come to the Cave with us so you can meet everyone!" Nightwing exclaimed.

The eight heroes shared looks with one another before looking back at Batman and Nightwing. Their choice was obvious to the two Bats before the group had even decided.

"Alright," Aquaman said, "When would you like us to stop by?"

Right on script. Batman said, "Meet here tomorrow at fifteen-hundred New Jersey time. We'll be here to bring you down to the Cave." Then, he left, Nightwing trailing behind him.

"Cool," Flash nodded, "Cool, cool. Totally not nerve wracking at all."

Cyborg stood from his seat. "Don't be nervous, Flash. We're actually being allowed in Gotham. Batman doesn't let anyone in Gotham."

"No," Green Arrow said, "He doesn't let anyone operate in Gotham. I've been many times."

"As Green Arrow or as a civilian?"

He fell silent and the others all laughed. He joined them.

"Regardless," Martian Manhunter said, "I think it's good he's allowing us to see his main base of operations."

"Yeah," agreed Superman, "I wonder what it'll be like."

Wonder Woman was the next to stand from her seat. "It will be quite the tour, I'm sure."

Part 2 Part 4

[unintentional-sad-wizard]

Trying to stay positive about my new job and reminding myself that I need to collect more data over time and not just make assumptions after the first day (which wasn’t even actual work just onboarding stuff) but. Uh. Being thrown into a really rough health flare up immediately after finishing my first day does not feel like a good sign for my ability to keep this job

[lovableapocalypse]

scar tissue

dr. jack abbot x female!resident!reader

wc: 2k

summary: an unexpected patient arrives in the er and turmoil arises

warnings: medical inaccuracies, mentions of injuries and medical procedures, mentions of alcohol abuse aka reader has a shitty alcoholic dad who yells, mentions of brief sexual content but nothing explicit (mdni!), power dynamic in relationship/reader is a 3rd year resident jack is an attending, unspecified age gap, wrote this at 4am

a/n: this is soooo inspired by greys specifically the scenes where meredith's mom is a patient at sgh and then the mark and lexie (deleted?) scene of them after the shooting. i struggled a lot with the ending of this one so sorry if it sucks lol. hope you like and enjoy and thank you guys for all the love

Tonight’s shift hadn’t been too wild, but you would never risk speaking the words aloud. Jinxing the remaining 3 hours would only ruin the night you’d had so far. 

A few random cases had come through and one drunk driver who was already stable and moved up to the ICU. One of the more chill night shifts you’d had in a while. 

Glancing up from your seat at the nurse’s station, you watch him move from South 15 to the curtain over- checking on patients. 

Your cheeks heat unprofessionally and unintentionally at the sight of him. A habit you needed to kick soon for you worked with the man 4 nights a week. That, and your flustered appearance was becoming more obvious than you’d realized. 

Dr. Abbot has been your attending for over 2 years now. Starting as an intern on an emergency med rotation and thrown to the night shift due to scheduling conflicts- you found yourself working closely under the army vet. 

His dynamic teaching and advantageous reassurance drew you to the emergency department. Deadset on surgery, you completely pivoted after working with the doctor. Declaring your specialty, you were now well into your third year of residency in the pit. 

You felt confident when you worked under Abbot. He gave you the room to make decisions and he trusted your opinions- only stepping in to assist during especially challenging moments. 

He glanced at you as his eyes passed over the board above your head. You shifted your gaze away, crumbling under the slightest look from him. 

This was new. This nervousness. You had always thought Abbot was attractive, harboring a small crush, but he was your superior and that was a boundary you would never feel comfortable crossing. 

Or so you thought. 

It happened 11 days ago. Not that you were counting. 

Your shifts had aligned that week to where you had three days off in a row, a rare occurrence. 

Since residency had put your social life on the back burner you took the opportunity to call up a couple of friends and go out.

By some means of the universe, you had ended up at the same bar as Jack that night. How you ended up in the back of his car was a blur. Skirt bunched around your waist, hips thrusting roughly into yours, hands pulling and grasping at anything they could touch, his mouth whispering dirty words and kissing soft desperate kisses against your skin. 

It was the heat of the moment. That’s what you kept telling yourself. It was a one-time thing. A mistake that wouldn’t happen again. Despite how much you secretly wanted it to. 

So you glanced away. You kept it professional. You avoided him like the plague and spent as little time as you could in his presence.  

You even traded a day shift with McKay to get a night away from him. You didn’t feel guilty or ashamed, you just didn’t want Jack to treat you differently. To see you differently. 

The calm of the ED was short-lived as the charge nurse shouted out, “Incoming ped versus vehicle. 3 minutes.”

You stood from the desk and Jack stepped out of the room he was in. You reached for gloves and moved much slower than you should’ve. 

The ambulance doors opened in a rush and the paramedics pushed in the patient on a stretcher. You were focused on snapping on your gloves. One tore as you pulled it on and you cursed under your breath, reaching for another. You listened to the paramedics as you grabbed a new one. 

“Male. 64. Was hit by a driver. Multiple femoral fractures and a blood alcohol level higher than I’ve ever seen.” The paramedic huffed and the patient slurred aggressively in response. 

You glanced up, approaching the stretcher, and your heart fell out of your chest. Your throat closed up on instinct. The patient was spewing nonsense but his demeanor was obvious. He was angry and drunk. And he was your father. 

Abbot calls out your last name, voice sharper than normal as he motions for your frozen self to come help. To do your job.

You don’t move. Your heart races uncomfortably. You hadn’t seen your dad in a few weeks. He was a drunk who had treated you like the biggest regret of his life from as far back as you could remember. 

You avoided him and only checked in on him every once and a while. Mostly to see if he was still alive. 

Even in his drunken state, your father recognized the last name Jack had spoken. The one you shared with him. 

Your father stopped squirming enough to glance up, directly at you. 

“Look who it is.” His sneer was exaggerated and he threw his head back on the gurney. 

Abbot’s brows furrowed and he looked between the man and you. 

“You know this guy?” He spoke as they moved the gurney to the trauma bay. 

The nurses tried to ask for his name and information but your father was shouting nonsense- mostly about giving him drugs to stop the pain. 

You swallow harshly and follow into Trauma 2. 

You feel like you’re in a dream. Watching your worst childhood memories clash with reality. 

“I need your help here.” Jack snaps at you, his eyes searching yours.

They’re already working. Moving your dad to the bed, cutting his clothes. And you’re useless. Watching and trying not to break down.

Your dad shouts and you flinch involuntarily. He yells at the nurse for morphine. Jack is frustrated at your lack of help, but more so concerned about your behavior. 

Your dad’s head snaps up and he glares right at you. “I’m talking to you! Give me something for the fucking pain-” His words are a jumble, but you understand him loud and clear. 

“Sir-” The nurse starts and your dad shouts over her. 

He keeps his head up, his gaze and words directed at you. 

“Do you know him?” Abbot repeats his question from earlier, harsher this time as he works over the chaos. 

Your dad answers for you unintentionally, shouting your name, “Give me something here. I’m your father for fuck’s sake!”

The room falls quiet for a beat and your stomach twists. 

“This is your dad?” Abbot’s eyebrows meet his forehead. 

“Is he an addict?” The nurse asks you. 

“Only alcohol. That I know of.” Your voice is a whisper. 

Abbot sighs harshly and the nurse moves to give your dad a stronger painkiller. 

“Right, get her out of here and send in Ellis, please.” Jack nods to another nurse. 

She grips your arm softly and you watch as your father finally stops shouting and lays his head back in a morphine-induced haze.

The nurse squeezes your arm and sits you in a chair before rushing off to get the other resident. 

You watch numbly as Ellis goes into the bay. You don’t know how long you stare at the wall for, your mind seeming to shut off. 

You hear Shen’s voice behind you and it sounds like he’s asking you a question but you’re not registering anything. 

Your stomach lurches violently and you stand, walking to the ambulance bay doors. 

They slide open and Shen calls out to you. 

You stagger to the bushes and the contents of your stomach come up. 

You cough and wipe your mouth, catching your breath. 

You grip the wall, needing something to stabilize your influx of emotions. 

His voice comes from behind you after a moment. 

“You okay?”

You turn to him and nod. 

He stands across the bay, hands on his hips. He’s unconvinced. 

He approaches you carefully, like a wounded animal, and you hate it. 

“I’m fine. I just need a minute.” You call back. 

You turn away from him and run a hand over your hair, gasping for a breath. 

His hand finds your elbow in a gentle grip and you glance his way. He doesn’t say anything. He just grabs your arm and slowly moves you to the curb outside the building. 

He sits you down and moves beside you, his knee brushing yours. 

Your eyes well up despite your best efforts. Your breath wracks and your head sags. 

You wipe at your tears as they begin to fall and try to hide your face in your shoulder. You feel his arm come around you, wrapping you in warmth. 

“You’re okay.” His voice is so steady and reassuring that you almost believe him. 

You nod, but the tears keep falling. 

“I’m sorry.”

You feel his head shake beside you. “Don’t apologize.”

Tears stream down your face and his arm squeezes you closer. You let your head fall to his shoulder and let his comfort consume you. 

Processing what just happened, you let Abbot ease your emotional toll. You feel his lips brush your hairline and your eyes squeeze shut. 

Sniffling, you sit upright again. Abbot’s hand stays on you, sliding down to rest on your back. 

“I didn’t know what to do. Or why I reacted like that. I didn’t- I wasn’t expecting to see him. Not here.” You wipe a stray tear away as you try to explain yourself. 

“From what I witnessed, your reaction tells me there’s a whole other story to your relationship with that man. You don’t have to explain yourself to me. You’re a good doctor, but everyone has their limits. Things that hit close to home- or things that come from home.”

He sends you a sympathetic look and you nod at his words.

“I can’t have my best resident freezing up again. Or avoiding me. Which I know you’re doing by the way.” He raises a knowing brow.

The sigh that escapes you is full of embarrassment and nerves. 

“I don’t want to talk about it-”

“About the fact that we slept together or that your dad is an abusive drunk?”

“Jack.” 

“Either topic is up for debate.” His lips rise slightly and you can’t help but shake your head at his persistence. 

“I want to forget it ever happened. All of it.”

It’s silent for a moment and at his lack of response you turn your head to look at him. 

His words are quiet, “If that’s really what you want, I’ll never bring it up again. But if it’s not, I can’t keep pretending that I don’t care deeply for you. In a way that I definitely shouldn’t.”

His words are a punch to the gut. A reality check.

“You do?”

He nods, “Have for a while now.” 

He reaches up to brush a rouge hair off your forehead and you lean into the touch. 

“I do too. I care about you.”

His smile is small, “I figured.”

“Was it that obvious?” You cringe. 

He shakes his head, “You’re just easy to read sometimes.”

“It’s inappropriate. Us.” You state the obvious, though you know the words are a useless feat. 

“Very.” Jack huffs a laugh.

You can’t help the small laugh that escapes you. 

After a moment you speak up again, “Is my dad okay?”

“He will be. He needs surgery, but he’ll live.”

You nod. 

Jack runs his hand up your back, his lips meeting your head. He stands slowly, reaching down to grasp your hand. He pulls you to your feet gently. 

“You don’t have to see him, but if you want to I can go with you.”

“Thank you.”

He nods and starts back towards the automatic doors. 

“Jack.” You call. 

He turns, eyebrows raised in question. 

You step closer to him and repeat the sentiment. 

“I’ll look after you.” He squeezes your hand and moves back inside. 

He drives you home that night. And many more nights after that. Your dynamic changes. While still supportive and professional, it’s deeper and fervent- your relationship building a whole new layer of trust. You loved him and it was easy. No more glancing away or avoidant behaviors. You let Jack into every aspect of your life and he cherished it- nurtured it. 

He was everything you needed and more. You accepted each other in whole, scar tissue and all. 

[perfctvelvet]

Megan Fox fics plssssssss

Last Call; Megan Fox/Fem!Reader

Content: 2nd POV. Strangers, slight infidelity (reader is dating someone but not exclusive), semi-public sex, D/s elements, praise and teasing, oral sex (Megan receiving), boot riding

Being one of the few bars in the town with a 4am liquor license made Aire one of the more popular bars around. It was somewhat upscale, but not completely a high-end bar. Megan has been working behind the bar for almost a year now, but this isn't her first bartender rodeo. When it came to last call she always had to call one of the security guards to come get the hanger-ons who thought they still had a chance to pick someone up for the night.

Tonight was no different. Last call was announced and some people began to slink out while others stayed. It was now Saturday morning, and the usual crew of hanger-ons were still sitting at the bar, trying to get in one more drink before they were forced out. One person stood out like a sore thumb though: you.

Megan has never noticed you before and she considers herself quite talented with remembering names, faces, and stories. It's not like it never has happened before, but it was rare to see a woman sitting at the bar alone for hours until the final call. She's been watching you all night, but not in a creepy way. She is often curious and she is curious about you. You didn't look particularly sad, but it was rare that anyone who sits at the bar alone for hours until close wasn't ruminating over something.

"Hey," she called out to you, instantly grabbing your attention. "Did you hear it was last call? Do you need anything?"

"Oh, no thank you. I'm okay."

You thought the conversation was going to end right there and then, but she walked your way and stopped right in front of you. She rests her hands on the bar and looks at you until you look back at her. You felt a little displaced. The bar is not your usual choice for a night alone so you weren't used to this. Was she trying to get you to leave? You were about 1 of 15 people still inside. The only sound in the room was low chattering and the sound of glasses being cleaned and polished.

"Do you always sit at bars by yourself?"

"Never, but the day I'm having -- well had -- seems fitting."

Some would call Megan nosy, she called it great customer service. Hundreds of faces came in and out of here every single week and someone always had some sort of story. Happy ones, sad ones, bizarre ones; Megan has heard them all. She always found people's actions and the whys behind them to be so fascinating. If she had gone to college she probably would've studied psychology, but she found standing behind the bar and hearing people talk to be more fulfilling.

"What kind of day was it?"

"It's not that interesting."

"I'm not really concerned with how much it's going to wow me. I hear enough crazy stories in one day, that I don't mind the stories that people may think will dull me. So, what kind of day was it?"

You looked around to see where everyone was. The other bartender was at the far end and the closest person to the two of you was six seats away. It was unlikely that anyone was going to hear or care about what you had to say about your day.

"I'm starting to see this girl and she was talking about what she wants in bed, and it feels like she was describing someone who was the complete opposite of me."

"What do you mean?"

The sex stories patrons told weren't scant, but it was rare for someone to admit that they may or may not be lacking in the bedroom. You seemed so sweet, and a little shy, to Megan so your honesty was brave to her. However, she wasn't prepared for what you had to say next.

"She wants me to be submissive in the bedroom and...and I've never been that!"

Megan always does her best to keep an open mind yet here you are insinuating that you like to be the dominant one in bed and she's shocked. Maybe under that sweet demeanor was someone mean who could fuck their lover hard and right.

"Well, when she says submissive, does she mean hardcore stuff like restraints and whips?"

"No? At least I don't think so? We haven't explored all of that yet, we haven't even fucked yet! I used to consider myself to be more flexible and at the whims of my girlfriends, but I think I'm a little jaded by my ex-girlfriend, y'know? She was a little bit of a pillow princess, which I didn't mind, but it's been a long time since I've been vulnerable to let someone have control of me like that."

"Well is that what you want?"

"I don't know? I'm not opposed to it. I guess it just feels like another mental shift. This must be what it feels like for former ballerinas to try to dance again after decades of not doing so."

"Yet, even ballerinas still retain something. It's muscle memory. If it feels natural to you, then do it. You know..."

"Y/n."

"Y/n, you don't have to do things you're uncomfortable with, right?"

"I know, I know. It's just that I really like this girl and our dates have been amazing so far. Personality-wise we click so much, but for some reason I just struggle to break this mold. Maybe I've adapted a little bit of that dominance into my personality and it feels a part of me."

"So let me ask you this, if you were to start dating another partner and she wanted to keep things vanilla, how would you feel? No one in the situation is particularly dominant or submissive, it's just a passionate, go-with-the-flow, sort of situation."

"I don't know. I guess I wouldn't mind it either. Like I said earlier, I care a lot about my partner's pleasure and whatever they want, I will go along with it."

"Okay, but what do you want? I've met people who are dominant and liked be fucked rough and people who seem more docile be dominant -- like you. So, deep down, what do you feel? Do you want to fuck, be fucked, or just make love to someone?"

You sigh, thinking really hard about what your heart's current desires are. Maybe it was the alcohol or the rough work week you had, but you wanted someone to hold you sweetly while fucking your brains out. You wanted that so bad, not all the time, but right now you did. You just didn't know how to vocalize it. You didn't have to though because Megan read you like a book. A smirk spreads on her lips and she picks up your glass before dumping out the rest of your drink you weren't going to finish.

"We are always changing, Y/n. There's nothing wrong with that, and equally there is nothing wrong with saying what you want."

"Fine. I would love for that girl to top me." Admitting that was like a weight being lifted off of your shoulders. The break-up with your ex was rough and you probably held onto some things for that. It wouldn't be fair to bring that into a new relationship. You wanted to let go and do what you felt was right. The only thing is you were unsure if you could do that. This new girl is not a rebound and you weren't going to treat her like one. "I would love that, but I just don't know how to let go."

Megan cocks her head to the side. There was something about you that was so cute that she understands why this new person you're seeing wants to fuck the shit out of you. You were so tightly wound and seemed like the woman to always be in her head, overthinking every little action. In her personal life she seemed to be attracted to your type no matter how many times she had to remind herself that relationships are not a conquest. Yet, she felt moved to help you a little.

"You don't have to do it alone. There's plenty of people who would love to help you out."

The coquettish slant in her voice and the way she leans into the bar is enough to get her point across. Your heart starts to beat irregularly, and instantly you see the image of your new possible girlfriend in your head. You two weren't exclusive at all, in fact she talked about another date she might be going on with someone who isn't you. You can't be upset with her because on the very first date you two laid out the rules and discussed what it would mean if you two were exclusive. She told you you were free to see other people while you two still get to know each other, but just be safe and honest about it. Neither of you had the 'what are we' conversation yet. This was something like a movie; hot bartender offers to sleep with a patron instead of just kicking her out 30 minutes before close. You rationalized this situation by telling yourself that this will help out your future relationships.

"Do you happen to know one of those people?"

Megan's smile widens. She got you reeled in.

"Meet me around the back door. Bars' gonna close early tonight."

-

You felt a little odd just standing there waiting for Megan. A chill had fallen over the night, which was now morning.

After every body was out, Megan ended her shift. She came out the back to you waiting for her. She half thought you would've left and just gone home. That wouldn't have been surprising at all, but it seems like you were serious about working out the kinks.

"My cars over there."

She points to a black SUV. It's not the biggest, but surely it could fit the two of them in her back seat.

"Okay."

You start walking towards her car, but you're stopped by her grabbing your hand. You stop dead in your tracks and look back at her in confusion. Megan has had this coy look on her face all night, almost as if she knows something that you don't. Looking at her sent electricity down your spine. Her eyes were piercing.

"Not yet," she says firmly. "Get on your knees."

Right here? Right now?

You almost asked that out loud, but you were too stunned to speak. At any moment Megan's co-workers could walk out and see them. She looked so confident and sure of herself though, maybe she has done this before and the people she works with are used to it? Surely anyone fucking on the property would get fired, but Megan didn't seem to worry about anything. You on the other hand worried. You wanted to feel free but it was going to feel free when you had the fear of getting caught stuck on the brain. You look around and there is not a single soul on these streets. Pretty soon the soon will start to rise and signal a new day, but right now you two were shrouded in darkness save for the outside light attached to the building.

You obey. After seconds of standing there, you finally obey and it makes Megan happy.

"Good girl," she purrs.

It's been so long since you've heard those words uttered to you in such a sweet manner. It scratched a deep itch that you had. You tried to picture the girl you're seeing saying those exact same words to you as you stare up at her, but all you can see is Megan.

Megan caresses the top of your head, enjoying the view of you down on your knees. It looks like you belong there in between her knees and looking up at her. The sight almost makes her moan. She had no clue what she was going to do with you when she asked you to meet her out back, but now her pussy is begging for attention.

"I want you to keep being a good girl for me, push my skirt up, and pull my thong down."

You do more than listen, you eagerly run your hands up her thighs to push her skirt up around her waist. The moment you were about to pull her thong down, she stopped you.

"Aht! Go slower. Don't rip the damn thing off of me!" Megan's tone is a little more harsh. In any other setting she would enjoy how eager you are to please, but she wants to take her time.

You feel slightly embarrassed but you push and continue anyway. You hook your fingers in the thin straps of her thong, but you don't pull them down her legs just yet. Instead you lean in and kiss her inner thigh. Megan instantly shivers and lets out a sigh that makes her sound like she's melting. You kiss her thigh again, remembering how much previous girlfriend's have gone crazy over that.

"Just like that."

You're happy to hear the approval in her voice instead of that nagging tone. You wanted to please her. At first you thought that you going down on her was going to give you power over her, but she's telling you what she wants, thus making you relinquish your autonomy in the situation. You find yourself waiting patiently for her next instructions; peppering butterfly kisses all over her inner thighs.

"I want you to suck on my clit like a good girl, okay? I know you can open that mouth and work wonders, I know you can."

It was every single encouraging word that left you hooked and addicted for more. You found solace in how she called you a 'good girl' and wanted to hear it over and over again. You need that, so you obey. Her thong comes down and your face is pressed against her dripping sex.

"Oh fuck!"

Megan is shocked at the sound that comes out her mouth. All you did was lick her clit once, but god you were so good at it. After a long shift that gave her an ache in her back from standing, you between her legs made her melt. She grabs a handful of your hair rather roughly. It's not like you were going to go anywhere, but she held onto you tightly.

"You sure you struggle with being a submissive little bitch?" She whispers between moans. She didn't mean to sound so harsh, she was just too turned on. And her words were turning you on. You found yourself wanting to perform for her, to be her good girl. "Don't stop," she moans again, breathlessly.

The juices coming from her pussy slide down your chin and you can feel it drop onto your bare knees. You never intended for this night to end in such a sloppy way, but with the way her juices mix with your saliva there was no other choice. You were slowly getting hooked on this stranger's taste; the way her legs quivered and her hips bucked at every lick. Her body was reacting in the way that your ex's always would when you went down on her, but everything felt different with Megan. You felt the flame deep in your belly and it made you desperate. So desperate that you pressed your clothed clit against her boot and started grinding against it. It wasn't the best feeling in the world but every little time you felt the friction against your clit you moaned into her pussy. Megan was shocked at how quickly you turned into a mess; then it dawned on her, this is who you were deep inside. It was like spilling your guts to a complete and utter stranger. It was so easy for you to give in and submit to her.

"Good fucking girl," she groans, clearly enjoying this all too much. "I should tell you how pathetic you look getting off on my shoe, but you just look so cute being this fucking thirsty for me...fuck me with your tongue!"

In seconds you slide your tongue past her slit and into her. Your hands are gripping her thighs but she grabs one of them and places it right on her clit. Instantly you start rubbing her clit.

"See you know what to do."

You can just hear the smile. There was still a little bite left in you and you enjoyed hearing her words turn to lewd moans as you rub her clit and tongue fuck her. The sounds coming from your mouth fill the back alley. It was downright filthy.

"Be a good girl and make me cum!"

She was close and you could feel her clit pulsing underneath your touch. She didn't give you permission, but you put your mouth back on her clit because you wanted to driveher higher. Your fingers don't just fall aside, you slide one into her and feel her warm walls wrap around it. If it weren't for you keeping her up, she might've been slumped over right now. Every single nerve seems to unwind as unadulterated pleasure washes over her. She moans and moans until she reaches her climax. Her voice gets caught in her throat as her cums seeps out of her and onto your face.

You feel something deep inside, nothing like it before. As Megan regains some of her composure she looks down at you and smiles. You almost feel like a dog that's about to be given a treat for good behavior. You should feel some sense of shame as you're not used to this, but instead you feel proud.

"Fuck," she lets her skirt fall down and she straightens up, "that was better than I thought it would be, no offense."

You were staring up at her with her cum on your face, of course you weren't offended. You wiped your mouth clean with your sleeve and stood up. Megan pulled up her panties and noticed how she could hear the birds chirping. The sun would slowly start to light the sky in about 20 or so minutes. She couldn't wait to go home and knock out after that.

"I think you'll do just fine," she pats you on the shoulder, something that feels oddly condescending. "But, if you ever need the reminder, I always work the closing shifts on Tuesdays and Fridays."

You didn't know what to say. You hoped you didn't need to come back and that everything with your new sort-of-relationship will work out. However, you feel a little pang in your stomach. Is it guilt for what you did? Is it sadness that it's over? Only time will tell.

[beasblogsposts]

Restless Routine (NxR)

a/n: hiii! This is my second fic on here so pls be kind 🫣 I posted a poll yesterday asking if anyone would be interested in seeing a fluffy Natasha x reader showing how the couple deal with Nat’s nightmares. It was 98% for it so here u go!! I hope u enjoy, any comments / feedback always appreciated.

Much love - Bea 🐝

Natasha and y/n had been dating for three years, living together for around a year and a half. Had they moved a little quickly? Perhaps. But in the words Tony uses to consistently tease the black widow ‘when you know, you know.’

The two women met at a Stark gala four years ago (yes it took a whole year for Natasha to admit her feelings, she gets embarrassed every time someone mentions it now.) Despite it taking a short while to make it official, the connection between the women was instantaneous. Y/n’s job as a journalist meant she was working the event, occasionally managing to grab each Avenger for a casual interview and update on how their team was doing. The one she was most nervous for though, was the assassin herself…So when the end of the night was nearing, Natasha approached her instead, and the two ended up talking on a couch until 4am…Y/n didn’t even write any of it down, too mesmerised by the green eyes and the way Natasha’s lips moved as she spoke.

Even though the team were saddened to lose their quietest roommate from the compound, they knew they couldn’t stop Y/n and Nat moving in together for much longer. The pair already spent almost every night together, sometimes catching Y/n strolling through the entrance in the middle of the night (which most of the team assumed was midnight booty calls.)

What most of the team (barring Clint and Wanda) wasn’t privy to, is that since they started dating, the only thing that could soothe Natasha’s constant and overwhelming nightmares, was having Y/n beside her.

After three years of being in the happiest and stable relationship she had ever known, Natasha’s nightmares were few and far between, only occurring because of a trigger or a particularly rough mission. However, after an entire childhood in the Red Room and most of her adulthood spent seeing inhumane things, they torturous memories and nightmares of losing her loved ones still had her waking in a cold sweat and breathless.

Most of the time, the pair (meaning y/n) pretty much had the aftermath of these nightmares down to a science. She had a routing to follow that was very effective at soothing her girlfriend and bringing her back to reality as quick as possible.

9 times out of 10, their routine worked, and within 15 minutes the redhead would be once again sleeping soundly, wrapped in her girlfriends arms.

Tonight, however, was not one of those times. Natasha had been on a paired mission with Bruce, that ended in him losing control and almost throwing her off a cliff, only thanks to a new gadget tony had given her the day before was Natasha was able to prevent him from doing any physical damage. Alas, being chased and hunted by someone who is supposed to love you brought back memories for her that she did not want to relive ever again, ones that she had worked tirelessly to process and move on from.

To add insult to injury, the return from the mission was delayed, meaning the day she returned was 24 hours after she was supposed to. Y/n knew the 24th is the day Natasha is due back from her mission, so she managed to push her work trip to the 25th, ensuring she had a night with Natasha to help her recover from the mission before she had to leave. This meant that upon Natasha’s return, y/n was not there to soothe her racing mind, and she was left alone to simmer in her nightmares.

It hadn’t actually been that bad Natasha had reasoned herself as she thought back over the weekend spent without y/n as she waited for the front door to open. But god was she happy to hear the keys in the door.

Later on in the evening, after many hours of reunion kisses, legs tangling and a hot steamy shower, the couple were now sleeping soundly wrapped together in their bed. Both had fallen asleep quickly and were now enjoying some well needed rest.

That was until y/n felt the tell-tale sign of something fidgeting against her chest, she stirred and opened her eyes slightly, lifting her head to analyse how bad the nightmare was.

Natasha was twitching, clutching the sheets against her chest and mumbling incoherent things in her sleep sooo we’re at about a 6/10 Y/n thought, timidly lifting a hand to run along her arm

‘Natasha, baby…wake up’

She whispered softly, trying to rouse her girlfriend from her cursed slumber. This usually did the trick; Natasha would relax in her arms and turn back into her embrace at the sound of her voice.

This night though, the touch caused Natasha’s fists to clench tighter, and the soft words y/n spoke must have morphed into something else in Natasha’s scrambled brain, as she flinched and called out

‘NO…n-no get off her… please’

She all but yelled into the darkness of her bedroom.

Okay now we’re at a 9/10. Y/n thought as she sat up fully, placing her hands more firmly on Natasha’s shoulders and squeezing them just enough to hope that the touch would reach Natasha’s subconscious

‘Natty, baby I really need you to wake up for me… come on honey come back to me’

y/n says a little louder this time, breathing a heavy sigh of relief as Natasha’s eyes flew open and she gasped for breath.

The redhead sprung upright, lurching forward grabbing y/ns shirt and pulling her closer, gasping breathlessly

‘a-are you real? God please tell me this is real’

Natasha rushed out, tears running down her cheeks as she palmed at your shirt, trying to get her hands on any bare skin, just to make sure she could feel you.

‘I’m here my love, it wasn’t real, you’re safe now…I’ve got you my love’

Natasha nodded, burying her face into her chest, taking shuddering breaths and clasping her hands around y/n’s neck. These words alone were usually enough to bring her down, but her breath was still ragged and her eyes were darting around the room.

Without words, y/n knew what needed to be done, knew what Natasha needed from her right now. She carefully unhooked Nat’s arms from around her neck, and with steady movements so she didn’t startle her, stood from the bed, keeping one hand placed on Natasha’s arm.

She stood and flicked on the lamp, illuminating the room so Natasha could see all of her surroundings. Y/n held out her hand, and Natasha took it and stood up wordlessly.

The pair exited the bedroom and walked down the hallway of their city apartment; their first stop was the front door. Y/n still holding the hand of a timid Natasha trailing behind her, aggressively pulled and wiggled the door handle, demonstrating that it had remained safely locked since they had gone to bed earlier that night.

From there, the due moved to the sash windows in their lounge, where Natasha observed her girlfriend tracing her finger along the edges of the glass, ensuring there is no broken glass or gaps in the hinges, just to prove they are still firmly closed.

After this was the kitchen, the study, behind the shower door and into the back of the deep closet. y/n felt the grip on her hand tighten as it did every time they checked the closet, something about that particular confined spot bothering her more than any other part of their New York home.

After half an hour of checking and then rechecking any possible entry point or hiding place in their apartment, y/n and Natasha returned to the comfort of their bedroom, where y/n sat Natasha on the counter in their en-suite, running a warm damp cloth along her wrists and just below her jaw. Tracing her pulse points to relax her nerves and remove any traces of sweat on her skin.

In the few minutes of sitting on the edge of the bathroom sink, with her girlfriend stood between her thighs, trailing her soft hands along her skin, the redhead was now lulling against her, her head resting on her chest and her breathing now even and calm.

Holding a half-asleep spy in her arms, y/n laid down in the bed, cradling her 5’4 assassin. When she tried to reach out and dim the lamp, the spy grabbed her wrist and squeezed gently, sending her a silent sign.

At this, y/n chuckled, leaning back against the pillows

‘I didn’t forget, I was just getting comfy first.’

She spoke, before lowering her voice to a calm whisper to recall the rehearsed mantra Natasha needed at the end of their routine

‘You are safe…you are loved…I am here’

‘No red room…no danger…no fear’

y/n spoke, punctuating each word with a soft stroke along Natasha’s arm, the duvet now secured around them.

After just over a minute of repeating the mantra, y/n felt the grip on her body loosen slightly, and the weight on top of her completely still, the only movements being the rise and fall of Natasha’s torso as she released small breaths into the crook of y/n’s neck.

Every night, y/n would do this every night for Natasha, the woman who would soon be her wife. She made a mental note to grab the ring box from the top of her closet tomorrow morning.

[eurydicees]

Also, I just saw you’re 23, I am too! It’s rough out here. Another idea: any characters, what’s it like being 23? Where are they at this point? I feel like hq shows that as being sooo grown up but like I’m just a big teenager right?? Idk just rambling

being 23 is so rough sometimes lmfao. i've got friends from high school getting married and friends from college having early life crises. i'm working full time and living alone but tbh mostly feel like i'm playing at house rn more than i am living on my own. whatever. it's fine. early 20s is just a silly time of life. anyways i don't have a fic for u but i Do have a headcanon list.

in no particular order, haikyuu characters as stupid things i've done in my early twenties:

atsumu: having a brother who is a chef does not prevent him from forgetting to take the cheese packet out of the mac and cheese box and dumping that into boiling water with the pasta.

udai: does not remember the last time he ate a vegetable.

oikawa: friends all went to a party without him and his coping method was getting so so so wasted on white rum and falling asleep on the living room carpet immediately after giving another friend a tarot card reading saying their breakup is imminent (to be fair, it was. but it was still kinda rude).

iwaizumi: after class, was led to a private stairwell by a friend, jokes "haha are you taking me to a hidden location to kill me." and then received a love confession. proceeded to say "uh. i'll think about it." then did finger guns. and said "im just gonna. go" and then fucking. ran. like not exaggerating, ran.

kageyama: went on a date. did Not At All Know it was a date, despite the very very obvious flirting. yes this was the same person as in the previous bullet point. don't look at me like that.

akaashi: took a 100 level class senior year and did not pay attention to a single lecture. instead wrote thousands of words of fanfiction in the classroom every day.

atsumu (again): another cooking one. i just think he'd be a terrible cook. sorry. anyways. "it's been 20 min, why isn't this scallion pancake im pan frying cooking yet?" (<- did not turn on the stove burner.)

yachi: hm the light in this room doesn't work. guess i'll just learn to see in the dark instead of inconveniencing anyone by asking to fix it.

akaashi (again): completely fell in love at first sight, but fast forward five months and it actually somehow worked out? however the five months were filled with the most insufferable pining possible, which could have been resolved so so so easily. also started talking about marriage, like, six months in.

bokuto: got sad. went out into a raging snowstorm in socks and no jacket. laid down in the snow for a long time. somehow, miraculously, didn't get a cold afterwards?

akaashi and/or yachi: changed majors and career paths because a pretty upperclassman asked them to. (i am very happy in my chosen path but jesus christ THAT was why i did it?)

hinata: flew from coast to coast of the country, then drove halfway back to the midwest in the span of three days. started a new job on the fourth day. didn't sign a lease on an apartment until the fifth day.

semi: skipped a day of work to drive four hours there and four hours back for a fall out boy concert. totally worth it but driving at 4am after a concert wasn’t the smartest thing ever to be done.

kuroo: started reading homestuck in the year of our lord 2024. this is an attempt to remain in contact with long distance friendships (by doing a bookclub) but jesus fucking christ dude.

ok this is getting too long and i needed to be ready for work, like 15 min ago lol. maybe i'll write more of these later, but i hope you enjoy these and my silly disasters are a little comforting :)

[daengtokki]

Can you do a one shot of Blind Date!Seungmin comforting and just being sweet and emotionally supportive of mc?? I need more some cozy soft minnie

thank you!

August, 4AM

Kim Seungmin/Female Reader

wc: ~1.1k

rating: fluff -`♡´-

comments: Soft boyfriend Seungmin is always good and welcome 🤍 also easy to sneak into their timeline for 2023

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

The phone buzzes again. Just another text, and you know who it is, but you don’t have the energy to answer. You don’t even have the energy to turn over and look at it. The empty bed isn’t the best place for you right now, but there’s nowhere else to go, and there’s nowhere you need to be.

Another text. And then a phone call. You ignore that, too, because you you’ve been crying too long and too hard.

But you do turn when you hear a video call come through. Only one person does that.

Seungmin speaks before you even see him come into view.

“Baby what are you doing, why are you crying? You look like you’ve been crying all day”

“Just a few hours”

“Just a few hours?” His head tilts to the side like a puppy, and you laugh for the first time all day. “That sounded better, now tell me what’s wrong. Why are you upset? Is it me?”

“No, of course it’s not you”

“I texted you a few times, you didn’t answer…don’t make me worry. Did you get some sleep?”

His voice is so quiet and gentle and patient.

“I didn’t, no…what are you doing? When are you coming home?”

“I just finished packing, and we are headed to the airport”

“To come home?”

“Yeah, coming home”

Both of you are quiet for a moment—you just stare at the screen, he’s preoccupied double checking his room as he heads out.

“A few other stops first, probably, then home. So it might be very late. But we can talk if you want...”

“I’ll be here”

Seungmin manages a wave, and then you hear familiar voices join him, so you know he has to hang up. But before he does, he brings his face up to the screen and kisses.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆

The beep of the keypad is so loud in the quiet hallway, and he’s sure it’s echoing all the way into the apartment and through every wall. Seungmin hopes you’re asleep, and he doesn’t want to wake you yet.

Everything is amplified as he walks in and sets his bags down. The tv is on, so he can at least see where he’s going, and he doesn’t trip on his way to the kitchen to grab a beer from the fridge. He grabs two, then thinks better of it and grabs one more. Now he heads for the bedroom.

The string lights are on, the puppy nightlight is on, and the bathroom door is cracked just enough to see some light coming through. You’re a small, curled up lump on the far side of the bed—half covered by the blanket, Seungmin’s pillow and yours both stuffed under your head, and when he walks around the bed, he sees your Daengmo plush wrapped up in your arms. He still doesn’t want to wake you, you look so comfortable and deeply asleep. But very gently, he sets the bottles on the table, and then he starts to undress, because usually, you sense his presence and wake up on your own.

It takes you a while this time, and Seungmin knows you’re exhausted, so he’s not surprised when you don’t stir until he climbs onto the bed and opens his beer. Even then, you only kick your feet and roll over on your back. He has to lean down and place a kiss on your cheek before you finally open your eyes.

“Minnie” your voice is scratchy from sleep and crying, “you’re here.”

“I’m here, peach. Did you fall asleep when we got off the phone?”

“Eventually,” you sit yourself up and scoot into his open arms. “What time is it? Did you bring me one?”

He hands you his open bottle, then grabs another for himself.

“It is 4:15…do you feel any better?

“I’m better now that you’re here”

“Why have you been so upset? What’s going on?”

You lay against him and press your cheek into his chest. One arm wraps tight around your shoulders, the other lifts his beer to his mouth until he downs half of it.

“I’m not sure. Maybe it’s a lot of things piling up and getting to me. I left work early and might take some time off.”

“You just feel sad? I understand, I get that way sometimes.”

When you don’t answer, he pulls you closer and sets his chin on top of your head. “Time off is good, I’ll be here for a few days, if you want company.”

“You always tell me, right?”

“Tell you what?”

“When you get sad”

“When I need to talk about it, yes. Promise.” Seungmin reaches and sets his empty bottle on the table, grabs the last one, opens it. “Sometimes I think you’re more…what was it you called me before? Stoic...you’re more stoic than I am. So maybe we should get some sleep, and talk more in the morning.”

“After you finish that.” You finally take a drink of your own. “How was your flight? And the trip? And your tiktok dance challenge?”

“My tiktok dance…uhm, oh oh,” his eyes widen a little, “jealous? You never get jealous.”

“Maybe…it was a cute. They were cute. You were even more cute.”

He squeezes you tight, “you're cute, and you have nothing to worry about. I only have eyes for you.”

“Do they have eyes for you…do they flirt with you?”

Your chin is lifted until he can look you in the eyes, but he doesn’t talk—he waits a few moments, then kisses you once on the lips. “No, not really. They don’t look at me the way you do. Nobody does.”

“I don’t believe that.” You reach up and pinch his cheek. “Have you seen yourself?”

Seungmin smiles and shows you his teeth, then shakes his head back and forth, “did that…get to you, maybe? And jump on your pile of bad things and knock everything over?”

The look he gives you is clever and endearing, and one eye closes slowly until he’s winking. He just knows. He can read your mind sometimes. You make it easy, though.

“You’re allowed to feel jealous sometimes, but you don’t need to worry, k?”

“I know, I just miss you. And of course I want your company, pup. You’re the only company I need.”

He’s thinking—trying to get his next words in order. “How would you feel about other company? Me and you aaand—“

Before you answer, you catch up with where his second bottle is. “You wanna let our secret out…more? I’m starting to think we’re not actually a secret anymore.”

“Maybe. But dinner with just,” he holds up two fingers, “whatever you’re in the mood for, they’re not picky.”

“When? Soon? Before you leave?”

You’re perking up, and he can tell. The color is returning to your cheeks, and he helps it along by pinching gently at them. “Yes, how about the Wednesday night?”

[aching-tummies]

Castor Upset

Stomach's been upset for a few days—intestines cramping up and refusing to digest properly. It's been messing with my appetite for about four or five days now. I've been ravenously hungry at random, inconvenient times, and kind of feeling sickly and full during the times when it's most normal to actually be eating anything.

For the last few days, it's been like, I'll wake up and my guts feel stuffed up and sick. So I opt to skip breakfast, lest I be sick or need a washroom somewhere during the two hour transit adventure just to get to my place of work. My stomach will finally start feeling hungry...less than 10 minutes before my shift. If I'm lucky, I have just enough time to grab something quick—baked good or wrap or something. With that down the hatch, I start work.

My workplace gives us awkward hours. Just enough to be considered an employee, but not enough for a proper lunch break. We get a 10-15 min break somewhere during our shift. Not really enough time for a proper meal.

It's hit or miss whether I feel hungry at all during my shift at work. I think, for the last 5 days I've genuinely felt hungry maybe two or three out of five shifts? If I'm lucky, I have a little something in my backpack—granola bar, or sometimes a sandwich that I'll scarf down during my break.

Endure a 2ish hour trip back home via transit. I think only one out of the five shifts this past week have had me feeling hungry going home—the other four had crampy, sickly indigestion as my transit-buddy.

We've had lots of left-overs in the fridge for the last while. Family's been entertaining guests and going out to restaurants and whatever and bringing home left-overs and whatever else. Unfortunately, most of the people in my house are blind to whatever we actually have in the fridge. Once it's in the fridge, nobody else will eat it. So I end up eating reheated whatever at home. Maybe two out of the last five days it's been eating because I feel a bit peckish, the other three were just me eating to help clear space in the fridge, or because it'd be awkward not to have any dinner.

Probably four nights out of the last five, I've been hit with intense hunger pangs around midnight-4AM that make it impossible to sleep. No wonder I've been sleep deprived.

Finally had my first day off and I ended up sleeping through most of it. I woke up to go to an appointment, came home intent on catching a nap, but family decided, “It's your day off—lets go out for lunch! No buts! You must be sick of all the left overs!” Not wanting to pass up the chance at eating non-reheated food, I took it, despite my guts being kind of upset all morning.

One large bowl of noodles later, upset was festering in my lower intestines while the rest of my digestive tract was pleasantly full. I got home and promptly fell asleep...for 9 hours. 9 hours between coming home from lunch and now it's after midnight.

My stomach's currently fluctuating between 70-30—hunger and upset keep switching percentages on me. I've been rubbing it and messing with my navel, trying to massage deeply into my guts in hopes that it'll settle on a sensation that gives me clear direction in how to deal with it. If upset wins, I'm going back to sleep and hoping for the best. If hunger wins, I'm going to have to figure out if it's worth it to sneak down and find something to eat while the rest of the house is asleep. It's been gurgling too—sometimes sounding upset and other times being a hungry growl.

A friend of mine recently got into using Castor Oil for health benefits. She's been using it for hair and skin stuff. I did some research and read about something called 'navel pulling'--applying Castor oil to the navel. It's supposed to quell aches (e.g. Period cramps) and possibly aid in digestion? Most sources I've read claim that there isn't a scientific base for any of those claims. Maybe the week-long upset has something to do with that. I've been using myself as a Guinea pig and applying some of the oil to my navel every night, giving myself a bit of a stomach-massage in hopes it'll promote better digestion or something. Maybe that's why my guts have been upset all week?

As always, send me your best responses. I'm actually curious if anyone else has tried 'navel pulling' and Castor Oil on the tummy. Any advice?

For those starved for more scenario stuff, how would you respond? If you were my partner and found me massaging my achy, hungry, upset guts before bed. Or if you woke up to hear my stomach grumbling from dueling sensations at 3AM. What would you do?

[duskfall-drives]

WIP Wednesday but it’s the opening paragraph to the fisherman Jewelzie AU that I started in February and never finished (Suzie saves Jewels from drowning and the two grow closer yada yada yada yk the drill)

4am.

That’s how early Suzie got up that Wednesday. Never mind that she had fallen asleep at 1:15, never mind that she would have rather flung herself into the bay than go to work. Her alarm still went off at 4am, and she still shut it off and got out of bed, without a snooze, without a vague promise of “just 5 more minutes”, without a complaint. She had fish to catch.

Like most mornings, she splashed cold water on her bare face, brushed her teeth, and did whatever makeup she could do in her delirium, a menial task she found helped her focus and made her more alert. Nothing inordinate, just some concealer, a bit of a shimmer here or there, maybe some lashes and a gloss. Though her blue-collar job demanded hard labor and heavy lifting, she was, chronically, just a girl, and she had some standard of appearance to keep up. She pulled on whatever bibs she could find, heavy gray fishing overalls that she couldn’t be bothered to style most days. Today, she added a black belt over top, because while fashion was never her primary concern on the job, the arm holes of the too-big bibs provided almost no actual coverage to keep her dry, so cinching it inwards adjusted the shape and coverage. She yanked on her signature peachy boots, the firm rubber offering little support on the job but were more comfortable than she could say for the alternatives.

Stumbling her way into the kitchen, she made a quick iced latte and grabbed the first things she saw for breakfast. Today, it was a string cheese, a peach, and a banana chocolate chip muffin. Maybe not the most nutritionally sound breakfast, but she honestly couldn’t have cared less. Creeping into the living room, she gave a quick nod to her plants, twisting ivy and proud-standing monsteras, her herb garden on the window reaching for the first rays of sunlight that hadn’t yet arrived. Her pet Hognose snake, affectionately named Hambone, was still asleep in his enclosure, yet he received a gentle scratch on his head and the promise of breakfast of his own at a more appropriate hour.

[simonsrosebud]

“It becomes kind of a lost and found situation” MY GOD. I WANT TO KNOW MORE PRETTY PLEASE

AHHH my wish is ur command, this is the full rundown on how Andrew stumbled upon Blake and brought her and Elliot into his and Neil’s family

So Andrew waits in the shed and catches her when she opens it. Mans is bored okay let him live.

Blake drops the bike and tries to run, and promptly trips in the still wet grass from when it rained an hour before. She kinda twists her ankle and tries to run again but can’t, and Andrew tells her to get up. She’s the same height as him and all fight, yet quickly folds when reality sinks. She begs him with mud on her arms and side of the face not to call the police or her dad “I-I was just- the 24 hour pharmacy is six miles away and I can’t drive and I just needed-” she’s close to hyperventilating and starts trying to back away. And Andrew tells her to knock it off. “You do this three times a week” boom got her. “I… I work there.” “At the pharmacy” “At the checkout counter,” she scowls. “At midnight” “I have school” “Not at 4pm” “I- look, are you going to get me in trouble or not?” “Contemplating it. Tell me the truth first.”

Blake works at the 24 hour CVS at 12-4am bc she doesn’t trust leaving her brother at home when she’s not there. Night time is safe bc everyone is asleep and safe. When she tells Andrew her brother is 14 and not like 3 he tries not to assume the worst. Because of this, he gives her Neil’s ratty old bike that’s been sitting for years, pumps the tires, and drops it on the grass for her. “Petal with one foot”

I should mention that he does this not bc he feels bad about her working at 15 years old but because he can’t won’t afford to get involved. She’s not his kid, she doesn’t know him, he has no ties or responsibility to her. He doesn’t know her situation, she never says anything about abuse and not every situation is like his own past, but he just has this sick feeling anyway.

That should’ve been the end of it, but two weeks later the bike shows up back in the shed looking like it’s been run over. A note attached reads “i’m sorry”. Andrew leaves $20 by the electric bike and writes “take the fucking bus” under her handwriting. 4 days later the money is gone.

Blake is gone for another 4 weeks, and then when Andrew can’t sleep one night he sits outside smoking a tiny bit of weed (bc Neil made him give up cigarettes long ago) and he catches her walking down the sidewalk. She freezes bc she was definitely about to borrow the electric bike again. This time he allows it. Neil hasn’t used the thing consistently since he was 38 (4 yrs ago) anyway.

2 weeks later he catches her outside again, this time texting Renee who is on the other side of the world for something he doesn’t care enough about, and Blake has a bruise on her jaw and a cut on her cheek, bandages around her one wrist/hand. “Bicycle accident” is what she says. “Funny. The bicycle is scuff free” He sees the brief panic in her face. “Who is hurting you?” bigger panic “No one, you’re crazy” “Maybe once. I know abuse when I see it” “fuck you, you don’t know me” he scares her off. No trace of Blake for 2 months, bike untouched.

2 months later, Andrew goes to the 24 hour CVS to get smth idk, not thinking ab it being Blake’s workplace, but what do u know? Blake is at the counter wearing a turtleneck in summer. She doesn’t notice him w her headphones in, and smth in Andrew cracks when she lifts a scratched up a bruised hand to lightly pull the neck down and itch, revealing the bruises. Her eyes are hollow when she sees him, recognition insignificant, but as soon as she realizes what he’s rlly looking at she silently shakes her head as if saying “no, not here, not now, not in front of others pls don’t say anything”.

Andrew leaves without purchasing anything.

However, when she steps outside 20 minutes later post-shift Andrew is waiting on the hood of his car. “If you lie to me, I will call the police and you can let them find out who choked you.”

Scratchy voiced, like she screamed too hard at a concert, she says “No-No please don’t, I can’t- you can’t call the police” “Give me one good reason not to” “He’ll- I’m only 15, they’ll make me quit my job and we can’t to afford- and they’ll split us up, and he- Elliot won’t- he can’t- oh my god” she starts breathing heavily and raggedly and trips over herself into the brick wall of the CVS. She’s never had a panic attack before and she can’t catch her breath and is she allergic to something? Is she dying? Andrew makes her sit without touching her, and waits her out patiently until she’s breathing normally.

“Please don’t call anyone” “Then show me” “Why? What the hell do you even want?” Andrew wishes he had an answer to that but he doesn’t. What does he want? For this kid to not die at the hands of someone else? To get off better than he had? Andrew’s been retired from exy for 6 years now, and sure, he got bored sometimes, but aiding a teenager he didn’t know out of abuse or through the foster system wasn’t something he was really looking to add to his plate.

To be honest, he’d been hoping that the bruises were from a boyfriend that she could just break up with. But Andrew knew better.

He wouldn’t know without seeing her wounds, though, and he’d done the trade game once to know that sometimes it worked. He pulled the sleeve of his shirt up and showed her his scars. She didn’t know who he was, there was no one for her to tell. He didn’t care anymore as it was.

“I gave myself these when I was younger than you. When things got worse, I got myself sent to juvie just to get away from it. I will make you a deal. You tell me the truth about what is going on, and I will get you away from it.”

“Not to juvie, I hope” she jokes meekly. He shakes his head and she just deflates. “It’s our dad” she whispers like he can hear her “He was always rough handed, but then our mom died two years ago and he just started getting really bad. Like, slaps me or spanks me for talking back, or-or throws shit all the time. I had- my hands were all wrapped up cause he threw a vase and it shattered, and I had to clean it up cause he won’t and he just- he just shoved me down into all the broken pieces and it cut me all up” she was crying again, shaking hands pressed to her eyes “and he almost drowned Elliot cause he thought throwing him in the lake over and over again would teach him to swim,” and oh that was an ugly sob “so now I make Elliot st-stay after school for sports and go right to his room after. I’ve been cooking our meals since mom died but dad doesn’t go to the grocery store and sometimes he barely gives me enough money to get food, so I’ve been working-” Blake cuts herself off bc she is trying not to panic again, and when she opens her puffy eyes she’s met with Andrew’s calm but blank stare.

Andrew doesn’t have the luxury of staging a car accident anymore, though. “And the neck?” “I told him I wish he died instead of mom” “Good”. Andrew stands and unlocks the car “We are going to get your brother, and then I am getting you out of the house. How long will it take for him to notice that you’re gone?” Blake looks scared again “I-I don’t know, he’ll notice, but he probably won’t do anything about it until night time. But he-he has my location on my phone”

Easy fix, she turns the location feature off and Andrew drives her to him and Neil’s house first bc he wants Neil as extra help just in case. “The girl that broke into the shed” “Oh, uh, hi? Why is she outside our bedroom?” Andrew switches to German “Her father beats her and favors drowning her brother.” Neil sits up bc okay that’s got his attention, and the first thing he says, albeit cautiously, is, “Does he… do I need to call-” “No” and phew thank god. Neil doesn’t need two confirmed hits on his hands. It’s been 23 years since he got rid of Grayson for Jean.

“We need to go get him out of the house, and in the morning we need to call our lawyer. For them” “Why not the police?” “She said no.” it’s so telling that that’s enough for Neil to get on board “Well, alright. Not forever, but definitely for the night”

Blake is kinda taken back by all of Neil’s scars bc he was sleeping shirtless after all, but then they’re leaving the house again and Blake is on the phone with Elliot that only gives Andriel a one sided convo about “we’re getting out of there for good, pack what you absolutely need, the rest we’ll… i don’t know, we’ll get another time, maybe…. yes, i’ll be there soon. don’t leave your room, i’m gonna go in and pack and then we’re out. quick and quiet, hear me?”

Anyway, luckily their dad isn’t even home they don’t know why. Neil sees Elliot looking through the window as they pull in, and when they follow Blake up the stairs Elliot trips backwards away from them “Who the fuck are they?” “We’re neighbors, kind of. We’re getting you out of here, take it or leave it” “El, it’s fine, please, I promise”

Neil goes with Elliot, who has a black eye and bruises from rough fingers on his forearm. “Dad left in a rampage when he saw you were gone, i told you that job wasn’t fucking worth it”

But then all four of them are safe in Andrew and Neil’s house, and King immediately goes over to Elliot who promptly collapses into a panic attack against the front door. He and Blake sleep in the guest bedroom except they really don’t sleep bc Andrew and Neil can hear the hushed whispers and questions and crying, because they might be in a strangers house and they might not know what comes next but they’re out and they’re safe and they’re going to be okay.

[whosmarii]

Nefer.

Summary:

Maybe the only way you can learn about your powers is with shock therapy. You didn't even know the extent they have. So S.H.I.E.L.D decided to send you on a mission they belived not to be Avenger typa deanger, they were wrong. Marc Spector case seems to be much more profound and obscure that it appears.

*This chapter is just a preface (it literally says prologue lol) so take that into account,

*Reader is fem and already has a name (you are Nefer dear), but you can like completely ignore that name and use yours.

Prologue.

It is 4am. You usually wake up at that hour, the training is beyond all bearing and you already state that you'll never use pills to the stress cause by it.

" You have to be able to control your brain on your own Nefer, if not, you'll have to be put down." That's what Nicholas Fury told you when S.H.I.E.L.D take you in. You think just like him, what it's going to be of you if your wellbeing depends on a pharmacist with a chemical engineering degree who just wants to capitalize on your suffering so that you buy more of his Lorazepam.

Anyways, he wasn't refering to that when he said that sentence. Nicholas meant that you need to be able to control your powers, so you can finally be a confirmed Avenger.

It's frustrating, seeing everyone around you having a symbiosis with their supernatural abilities. Even Peter with just 15 years did it in less than a week. But you couldn't do it in 19 years, not even when 5 of those years consisted on studying your might, a fucking failure.

In fact, if it weren't for Tony, Bruce and their test, today you would still not know the label of your powers. Apparently you can somehow work with Love and beauty but we don't exactly know the dimension of this. You always suspected it tho.

"Denisse could you take care of Nefertiti for a few minutes, please?" Said Carmela, Nefertitis mother, leaving the living room leaving no place for a response. "Aren't you the most cute girl hm?" said aunt Denisse looking right at the baby of 1 year old in front of her. The little girl stretched her arms to try and touch her belly. "Oh, you like my t-shirt? look it has color pink! you like color pink right Nefi?" Nefertiti smiled at her, trying to say something but failing because of her lack of speaking ability, still she managed to mumble some words, or an attempt of them. "baba- babs-bybybyby" "Baba? papa? you want your daddy? your dada? i'll go find him baby" baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby. That was the word. baby, baby, baby, baby. "baba- babababa- byyy-baaaa by- baby-baby-baby" the child yelled the word alone in the living room. Of course the sound alerted the whole family making everyone run towars the living room, just to find Nefer repeting the word baby with her eyes closed. "I can't belive this... Anton, get the camera! Nefer is saying her first word!!!" said the mother of the little girl to her husband, kneeling in front of her to praise her for her intelligence. Meanwhile aunt Denisse remaind standing in the doorframe with a frown on her face. Nefertiti's first word was baby and she was uncontrollably saying it, now with her eyes open looking right on hers. A few seconds later Carmela notice the weird behavior, she thought that maybe Denisse or her husband were making silly faces and movements so her baby would look at them. But when she looks backwards the only thing she sees is her sister touching her belly. "Baby in here?" mutters Denisse while pointing at her belly. Nefertitis smile gets bigger and she starts nodding with her head. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. "Are you pregnant..?" "Yes."

Your mother would always tell you that story. How did you know your aunt was pregnant? no one knows, no, actually you do now. You guess that it is one of your abilities. You don't exacly know how the fuck could could you use that for an Avenger mission but at least you knew it was your thing.

Your family also told you storys about how you would talk about couples that weren't actually together and years later got married. At first everyone thought that maybe you could see the future but that wasn't it.

Or about the many times people would do what you told them to do just because you were the prettiest girl they ever saw. And i'm talking about an extreme dimension. People doing ilegal things on autopilot just because a pretty 7 year old girl told them to.

Bruce says that you have some type of higher intelligence when it comes to femenine aspects like fertility and love and that you clearly have some type of absolute beauty that if you learn how to use, it could be very powerful.

But for now, you are useless. You can't be on Avengers missions if you don't know when are your powers going to strike and in who are they going to strike. That's why you have to wake up at 4 am every day to train your powers. That's what you been doing for the last 5 years.

And that definitly has to change now.

[mitsdriveswhere]

planning is hard

I feel like it's been a while since I've had a Story about a trip I went on. I've had stories, sure, but Stories? With age comes wisdom, so they tend to be far less frequent. Also because most of my Stories involve some amount of emotion that, on the emotional spectrum wheel, is probably not one I like to sit in because it is, in fact, unpleasant, and I have therefore selected out some behaviors that cause them to happen.

That being said.

I am what my sister has described as, very type B.

I would say, for the most part, that is the case. While I do have pretty rigid routines, they are routines that keep me regulated - eg, relaxed. Havin' a good time. If I deviate from those routines, I need at least 5 business days to realign, but I'm quite good at my routines, and I like doing them. If my routines are broken, I become very stressed, anxious, and close down. My solution to this is to have a lot of routines for the situations I find myself in the most (ie, work and weekends), and to entirely avoid any type of planning for anything outside of that.

I like to experience the full range of human emotions, even the unpleasant ones, so there is a certain amount of 'routine' that can also be placed on having no plan whatsoever. I think I draw a very good line between planning and not planning. However. I have also been told by numerous individuals that the way I travel stresses them out.

Which isn't usually a problem, because I travel alone. I'm the only one I'm stressing out. Point being. I was going to visit my sister in Japan, and I was trying to be financially efficient with my travel plans. I got the best deal anyone I know has ever heard of on my flights (>$1000 round trip from Colorado to Japan), but it did involve a few extra steps.

Essentially, it would happen like this: take a car to the airport, take a plane, take another plane, take another plane, take a train, take a shinkansen, take another train, then take a bus - or walk, depending on how late I got in. Fairly straight forward, I thought. Perhaps foolishly.

I was supposed to leave my house at 4:30AM. I set two alarms - one 4AM, when I was supposed to wake up, and one for 4:30AM, when I left.

Can you guess which one I slept through?

Yeah, I woke up to the 4:30AM alarm, immediately rolled over and texted my mum - who had graciously agreed to wake up early and drive me to the airport - the following texts:

"Fuxk fuckbfuck I woke up late give me 6 min I really need to showe"

"Shower"

"I'm sorry"

Luckily I had actually gotten everything ready by the door the night before so I stumbled out of my house 9 minutes later, and we got to the airport on time.

For a delayed flight. I checked our new departure time - I would have 25 minutes to get from one gate to the other at DIA. Not stressful at all. Got to my gate at DIA.

For a delayed flight.

I sat down, kind glad that it had delayed so I could breathe easier but also a little bit freaking out because boarding started at LAX 15 minutes after my flight would get in from DIA with this new delayed departure.

At one point while we were waiting the flight attendants came over the intercom saying they didn't have enough seats, if anyone would agree to wait for a later flight. No one got up. Ten minutes later they offered $1000 a piece to two people to take a later flight - that got two people up and moving lol.

So I get on my flight, land in LAX - an airport, mind you, I specifically wanted to fly into because I wanted to see its famously terrible car infrastructure. There are news stories about how terrible it is. And I was just running from terminal 6 to terminal 7 so I could catch my flight. Haaah.

Twelve and a half our flight, couldn't sleep at all. Watched 2 seasons of two different shows. Watched 4 movies. Finally get into Narita Airport.

Now, I had been told that for Japanese customs, you can expect a wait time anywhere from 15 minutes to 3 hours - and I had to book my shinkansen later that night in advance, so I split the difference and banked on 2 hours.

Yeah it was 15 minutes. I was out of Narita airport and had so, so much time until I needed to catch my shinkansen an hour away. So I went to an airport employee, whipped out my google translate app, and asked where I could get a train from Narita. He pointed to the escalator and told me how to find the ticket desk. Got my ticket, got on the train in Narita.

Lovely train ride from Narita. One of my absolute favorites. Really shows a lot of the beauty of both Japan's countryside and cities. Also gave me the time to discover that the eSim I had been planning on using wasn't compatible with my Shittiest-Cheapest-Phone-Plan-Ever Sim card. So I could use public wifi, but if there wasn't any, my phone was essentially a very cool light up brick.

Cool.

Got into Tokyo Station.

First of all. Why did I do this. Why did I chose to stop at the 7th busies train station on planet earth as my first ever major train station - ON A SATURDAY EVENING. Why did I do this. I couldn't tell you. Anyway, I kept hopping from shinkansen wifi to shinkansen wifi as they arrived and left the station to Line my sister, asking what I should do - they said I should try to get a ticket to an earlier shinkansen. I (somehow) managed to get myself to the shinkansen ticket desk, and used my google translate app to ask if I could change my ticket to a train sooner. My options were: 8 minutes, in an hour, or in an hour and a half.

And me, with confidence I should not have had, chose the one in 8 minutes. The Nozomi #something. Problem. being.

'Nozomi' is not spelled 'Nozomi'. It's spelled 'のぞみ'. Maybe I just wasn't looking in the right places, but I could not find any of the train names in English. I'll be honest, I started to panic, have a little itty bitty little panic attack.

I stopped, pulled myself together. Panicking does nothing for me here. Thousands of people do this every day. Thousands of stupid people do this every day. Just focus. So I pulled, from the depths of my two month interest in Japanese from ten years ago, the single Japanese letter I could remember: の. I knew what that meant, and I was pretty damn sure there were no other lines that started with that, so I went with that one. Thank you random Japanese man who was standing on the platform who confirmed for me by looking at my ticket and nodding to me that I was at the right place. Got on the shinkansen. Was awesome!

Got off at Osaka Station. Second of all. Why did I do this. Why did I chose to stop at the 4th largest train station on planet earth on A SATURDAY EVENING. Was again feeling a teeny tiny bit panicked. a minuscule panic attack, you could say. I couldn't get any wifi anymore, couldn't Line my sister. I had three error, unsent messages to them, the last one was 'Bro please answer me' lol. But! I took a breath. Panicking does nothing for me here. Thousands of people do this every day. Thousands of stupid people do this every day. Just focus. And I walked from one station employee to another until they got me to the ticket desk, and I got on the most packed train I've ever been on in entire life.

It was so packed when people got off on a different station I was nearly pulled/pushed at a 40 degree angle out of the train. But I managed to right myself, and on the train went. One station before my sister's, I got a seat. I immediately went to sleep. I'd been up for 26 hours at this point. I was tired.

Finally the train got into my sister's station. Too late for buses. Too late for taxis. I start walking, holding onto my phone that held their last Line messages to me, directions to their house. I'd walk the last mile and change.

"Turn left at the 7/11" they said.

Lo, for they had no idea.

There were two 7/11s between the station and their house.

So I turn at the wrong 7/11, going off in the wrong direction.

It's at this point, that I remember I - the avid planner - had actually downloaded the offline map of my sister's town, and so I opened it, saw I was going in the wrong direction, righted myself. Thirty minutes later, I'm maybe 5 minutes from my sister's house. It's 11PM. I am tired. I see, in the distance, someone biking towards me. Waving. And I hesitate. What if that isn't my sister. Wouldn't that be so awkward if I waved back. So I didn't. I just kept walking, the biker slowly approaching.

And what a good thing I didn't. Because it wasn't my sister. It was some random dude. On a bike. Waving at no one. There was no one behind me! I Looked! So I walk some more, see an apartment building, with the name of the apartment complex I'm looking for. Go up the stairs. Ring the doorbell.

Silence.

Panic.

What if I just rang some random Japanese person's door bell at like 11:30PM. Oh my god. oh my god. oh my god oh my god oh my god.

Door opens.

It's my sister.

They seem kind of surprised I'm standing there. They hadn't heard from me in two hours. I look them dead in the eye, into their soul. And I say.

"There are two 7/11s."

[tojiscrack]

bro im genuinely gonna tweak out my average used to be99 in social 💔 like i reached my peak i got 100s and 95s on every single assignment TELL ME WHY I GOT AN 85 ON MY PAPER WHICH ISNT EVEN THAT BAD AND MY AVERAGE WENT DOWN TO 91 BRO MY TEACHER LITERALLY TOLD US THE PAPER WAS PRACTICE AND THAT HE WASNT OGNAN MARK TAT AND HE LITERALLY DID AND I GOT AN 85 AND APPARENTLY MY GRADE DROPS 8 PERCENT HOWWW IN THE WORLD IVE DONE 15 PROJECTS SO FAR THIS SEMESTER. LOCEKD IN FOR EVERY SINGLE ONE..A DN THE PROJECT PAPER HTAT I GOT AN 85 ON LOWERED ME DOWN????I CANT WITH TSHI TEACHER I HAVE SM TEA ON HIM BUT ITS LTERALLY 4AM RIGHT NWO AND IVE BEEN CRASHING OUT FORF LIKE 10 WHOLE HOURS LIKE A 91 AVERAGE IGNT BAD BUT HOWWW THE FRIGG DID IT GO DOWN THAT MUCH FROM ONE PAPER THAT WAS SUPOSED TO BE A PRACTICE LIKE AND THIS MAN REALLY GAVE ME AN ONE SENTENCE FEEDBACK IFT WAS LITERALLY JUST "Love the detail and writing style, excellent work! Format is wrong" HOOO YO LITERALY GAVE ME A PAPR WITH THE FORMAT AND I WROTE IT ACCORDING TO THE FORMAT BUT EH LITERALLY SAID ERRR I FORGOT TO SAY YOU SHOULD DO ANOTHER FORMAT THEN HOW IS THAT MY CLASS'S FAULT U FORGTO TO SPECIFY THE FORMAT OMFFF IM GENINELY GONNA CRASH OUT AND ALL HE TALKS ABOUT IS HIS JAPANESE WIFE AND HOW HE STUDIED IN JAPAN FOR 5 YEARS LIKE OKAY WE GET IT UR WHITE AND FAT BUT U SECRETLY KNOW JAPANESE WE GET IT.. AND LIKE HE LITERALL MENTIONS JAPAN EVERY DAY AND HES LIKE "oh i ate ramen yesterday! haha, i bet you guys call it ramen, but i call it lah men" HO SYBAU TS PMO FR RN TS CNT BFR U GNNGN MKE ME TWK O OI IA EEO EEAE BROOOOO AND I LITERALLY SAID I DABBLE IN ANIME AND AFTER THAT HE KEEPS ASKINGME ABOUT ANIME AND LIKE WHICH ONE I LIKE BUT NOT INA NICE WAY IN LIIKE A TESTY WAY.. LIKE HE WAS LIE OHH ER U LIKE ANIME BUT I BET YOU ONLY WATCHED JJK RIGHT AND I WAS LIKE OH IVE WATCHED OTHERS TOO AND HE STARTED SPEAKING IN JAPANESE AND ASKE ME SOMTHING LKE HO IM NOT JAPANESE TF DOES THAT MEAN AND HE WAS LIKE ERRR U WOULD KNOW IF U WATCHED ANIME IN JAAPNESE DUB BUT IG U DONT, YOU SHOULD START WATCHING ANIIME IN THEIR ORIGINAL DUB BECAUESE ANIME IS JAPANESE CULTUE AND UR DISRESPECTING THEIR CULTURE BY WATCHING ENGLISH DUB LIKE BROO I LITERALLY DO WATCH IT IN JAPANESE DUB I NEVER SAID I WATCH IT IN ENGLISH DUB AND LITERALLY WHATS WRONG WITHT HTAT TOO??? AND MIND U THIS IS MY TEACHEF IM JUST TWEAKING OUT RN AND IVE BEEN REREADING LIARILRA RIGHT NOW AND IT LIKE GENUINELY CALMED ME DOWN BUT LIKE BY 3 PERCFENT THATS HO W MUCH IM TWEAKING OUT LIKE BRO U CAN TELL BY HOW I HAVE SPEKLING MISETAKES AND INCORRECT GARMMAR AND YAPPING PARTS WHERE IT DOESNT MAKE ANY SENES IM GENINELY SO DONE HOW DID IT GO DOWN THAT MUHC LIKE IM NOT EVEN ADDING IN ANY OF MY GOOFY REACTION PICS BECASU THATS HEO MUCH I AOJEWAFOIJZOIFSUNGJFXDXIP

S'F;AZFAZSDFESWEFGH32

ewww ur teacher’s a weirdo and in dire need of a shower ewwww 😭

why’s he fetishising japanese people like that wth 💀

the crash out is valid girl, dww 😤

[hiddenendings]

The official Blanktember calendar is here! 4 weeks of general prompts and 30 days of specific prompts for a month of telling stories about our two funny train men!

Each week has a general theme which you are free to write or create art for and have a relaxing time. For those after a challenge, each day will have a specific prompt that correlates to that week's theme. (Omegaverse being under Opposing Dynamics, for example.) ((And yes, Trains gets its own day outside of Transportation the boys would want it that way!))

The event starts September 1st (or earlier if you get inspired) and I look forward to seeing everyone's creations!

Remember to tag all your work as 'Blanktember' as well so we can all see what you create!

(Also, no complaints about the calendar! I spent 3 hours on mobile making that until 4am!) For a transcription of the prompts check below the read more!

Week One: Opposing Dynamics

Day 1: Black & White

Day 2: Youger & Older

Day 3: Dominant & Submissive

Day 4: Bigger & Smaller

Day 5: Meaner & Nicer

Day 6: First & Last

Day 7: Up & Down

Day 8: Formal & Casual

Day 9: Alpha & Omega

Week Two: Angels and Demons

Day 10: Heaven

Day 11: Hell

Day 12: Angelic

Day 13: Demonic

Day 14: Sins/Virtues

Day 15: Prayer

Day 16: Rapture

Week Three: Gods and Myths

Day 17: Pantheon

Day 18: Religion

Day 19: Truth

Day 20: Ideals

Day 21: Monsters

Day 22: Daemons

Day 23: Forgotten

Week Four: Travel

Day 24: Transportation

Day 25: Trains

Day 26: Vacation

Day 27: Adventure

Day 28: Time Travel

Day 29: Hisui

Day 30: Reunion

[shadyhouse]

venting about work things are AWFUL right now and i just need to scream about it

i got this new job a few months ago thinking that it was gonna help me get out of this financial mess im in, i started with full time hours the first few months and things were good! but suddenly everything is just WORSE now. sure it pays slightly more but i got absolutely no hours this month bc youre expected to "earn" hours bc its all "performance based" like. i work at a fucking gas station. their literal actual excuse for me when i asked about it was "we hired more people during your shift and they wanted full time" so i just get completely thrown under the bus bc you dont deem me deserving of full time hours??? because i dont go extremely above and beyond ???????? AT A GAS STATION???? WHERE I ALREADY DO WHAT IM TOLD AND MAKE SURE ALL MY WORK IS DONE RIGHT AND PROPERLY AND THATS ALL IT HAS TO BE?????

this place's expectations are so high and corporate has their heads so far up their own asses that they treat it like youre working at the greatest establishment ever conceived and youre just undeserving and unappreciative of their generosity if you dont make their brand your entire fucking life. like okay you have this brand recognition but its still a Fucking gas station. this place is so cultish. you have to sell your soul to the company and if you desire a work/life balance or dont take it as seriously as the managers do youre punished for it.

i seriously dont know how i went from working full time to working 3 days in a single month, ive asked for more hours but they expect ME to CALL all the stores in the area to ask if they need help (most of which i cannot get to! because i dont have a car! and they know this!) and even then im only allowed to work for 4 hour shifts bc thats the rules with covering. like seriously what the fuck kind of setup is this. if im gonna spend $15 on a lyft to get to work at least let me work a full shift????????

im on day 5 of 5 days off in a row, and then after tomorrow i have 5 more days off in a row, and then i work an 8 hr shift on wednesday and a 5 hr shift on sunday. which is a day that from the start ive requested off. i have plans that weekend. so theyre straight up ignoring my availability. literally all i did was ask if i could work 8am-4:30pm instead of 6am-2:30pm because i have to wake up at 4am to catch the bus and its been really difficult for me. thats literally all i asked for and now suddenly i get less than 20 hours in a single month.

like this was so abrupt and sudden and i cant think of a single thing that would make them turn on me so hard. i do my job!?!?!? last time i was at work my boss was really short with me for no reason and she even wrote me up for something that 1) i never even got properly trained on 2) for a station that i have asked time and time again to NOT put me on because im NOT good at it. either put me in the kitchen or have me clean or have me stock, dont put me at register because i suck at it and it stresses me out. every single shift ive had for the last 2 weeks has been register. and then they blame me and write me up for things that im actively asking not to do bc i Know ill fuck it up. and we've had conversations about it. i was told that theyd put me in places im more comfortable in. and yet here i am getting written up for stupid reasons over things we've already discussed. they want to fire me SO BADLY

im honestly really upset and i dont know what to do anymore and it sucks bc every job ive had since 2022 has treated me like absolute garbage and i dont know what the fuck im doing wrong????? i start, i get told im a good worker, and then everything does a 180 and im forced to look for a new job. the cycle will never stop this is just what my life is. i dont know what to do or how to fix this. i dont even WANT to work at a gas station im here out of desperation bc my last job that i thought was going to be a career treated me so badly i just left to the first job i could find that paid more 💀

on top of everything my bank account is deep in the negatives and im scared to keep on asking for help because like. im sick of this too!!!! everything sucks!!!! everyone is broke!!!!! the good news i guess is that i applied for a better job at my roommate's place that pays a lot more and its an actual Real job but who knows if thatll actually happen..... ugh only time will tell. things HAVE to get better they NEED to 😭😭

[bottombillyapologist]

why i've been offline

This is mostly just to vent, tbh, bc I know I'm not really a large enough voice online for my absence to be noted. but I feel there's some weird deep level of irony in my writing where I project my worries, fear, or trauma and then those things self realize in my life.

tw for talks of abuse (?) and weight ment.

In summary, Ive had a gap of a few years between high school graduation and college. Nearing the end of summer I was like. scared but hopeful? there were a lot of changes happening at once, I was supposed to move out and start a higher paying job and ofc start going to college. and due to reasons, I have heavily discounted tuition but I can afford dorming or a meal plan. but Back In The Day of the 2008 housing crisis my parents were going to lose our house so we moved in with my grandparents, and then the mortgage was forgiven, so my dad still owns that house, it was just empty (or mostly empty) for like 15 years. it had (and has) problems, but the plan was for us to fix it up over the course of 9 months and I move in when the semester starts bc it's like 15 mins from my school, and a lot just... happened. I bought a car and it died four months later, my brother's car died, my partner bought a car that never drove and then his next car died, so he had to buy a third car. my brother had bought his car on refunded tuition that it turned out he wasn't supposed to get (every friend INCLUDING ME told him not to spend the money because the amount was wrong and he did anyway, he also bought the car without consulting my dad, a hobby mechanic and got screwed) and he had to leave school for a semester and my dad had to bail him out and pay it back. We didn't have the money to fix the house and he didn't tell me, a habit he picked up from not being able to tell my mom anything without her breaking down.

So I was pulling 16+ hour days. I would work 4am-noon, drive to the house in my mom's car and work there 1pm-9pm, then drive home. A few times I got interrupted by errands or had other plans and was out of the house until 1 or 2 in the morning. I didn't do it every day, but 2-3 days a week I would if I had the car. We just got closer and closer to our deadline of the start of semester and I was in too deep to back out, not to mention I didn't want to back out because I couldn't wrap my head around continuing to live with my mom, driving 40+ minutes to school, working, and doing homework. All of my partner and I's stuff was in the house. The last thing we had to finish was hammering a new drain pipe in and sealing the wall back up, and that was already on my first day of orientation for the semester. I had already quit my job and started a new one 2 minutes from the house.

In hammering the pipe in, the other old pipes cracked and water started running down the walls in the first floor. We had to shut all the water off and my partner and I packed backpacks to go back home. First the pipes would be fixed in a few weeks, then a month, then whenever my dad had the money, now it's nearing finals and the plumber is ostensibly starting work next week, but we have to replace all the pipes and tear out the entire bathroom.

I have lived in my empty bedroom out of a backpack since. My little brother was supposed to get my room so he's sleeping in my parents bedroom. This is already long so I can't possible cover all the details but a) my mom is mentally ill and physically disabled, she is fine on her own if absolutely nothing goes wrong but if anything does she is incapable of solving the problem on her own and i am the default caregiver when my dad isn't home. she is explosive and can get physical with people or our pets, but she is incredible sweet and kind when not triggered. b) my family/parents are kind of hoarders. not trash or like... living in filth but every available space is full of stuff.

I had to quit my new job. my partner's new job fell through, so I had been stretching my last paycheck for like a month before I started borrowing money from my dad because I knew any money I asked for would just take it away from my younger brother or fixing the house. in the midst of this my second partner also broke up with me, we'd been growing apart due to a lack of time or attention on my part, which is on me to a point. My partner got a job a couple months ago. I finally got a new job like three weeks ago, I've been dealing with classes well but for a while I was living off the food pantry and emergency funds from my school. thankfully I am still medicated, but due to an insurance issue I didn't have my adhd meds or antidepressants for the first week of the semester. I've lost like 30lbs and I don't recognize my face anymore. I'm still finding happiness in the small things but it's hard to find the time or energy for creativity when I'm trying to figure out what possessions I have that I could sell so I can buy groceries or get my partner a christmas gift bc neither of us could afford to do anything for his birthday. idk. part of this is just a vent? the other is me laughing at the deep irony of using fanfiction as cathartic escapism. and being unable to get to the Good Healing part of the story bc apparently I'm designed as a being to be karmically punished. I planned to get back to writing some after finals, but I now have two jobs and I'm still trying to get out of the hole of not having a job for months. my first paycheck is already gone to house supplies and I guess I have to find a way to buy a space heater too bc the heat is off while the plumber works.

Idk. I don't vent to anyone in my real life because I don't want a pity fest. I feel privileged that I still have food and a place to live and I can go to college, I'm just pushing more and more to the upper limit of what I can do. I thought about doing art or writing commissions but I don't think it'd be enough money to justify the time I could be working on homework or working on the house, and i'm not sure I'd even have time with the two jobs. any money I have immediately goes to house stuff or some menial gifts and I feel like I'm being crushed by Guilt Of Being Alive from every angle.