#and i was looking forward to rewatching the whole show So much but i was waiting till s4 was done

[scribes-of-valar]

𝘉𝘰𝘺'𝘴 𝘢 𝘓𝘪𝘢𝘳

▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။||||| ᴄʟᴀʀᴋ ᴋᴇɴᴛ x fem! reader

「 ✦ A/N ✦ 」 I don't know what has creeped into my brain, but I've started rewatching the show and I literally wrote this in a day.

✬ summary ✬ Finally taking the plunge and ruining your friendship with Clark, you go on your first date but the next day he's acting like a whole new man. Not a good one. You don't know if your relationship can recover from his cruel behavior, but he's not going to give up so easily.

For the nth time, you stand before your mirror and find yourself dissatisfied. No outfit is right, each one is too little, too much, too slutty, not slutty enough. You haven’t even started on shoes yet, you would be in the grave before you were ready for this date. Throwing yourself down on your desk chair, you start tugging the stockings down your legs. 

You’re not sure why you thought tights would work during the peak of a Kansas summer, but you’re clearly not thinking much at all today. Head propped in your hand, you slump against the edge of your desk, fingers running idly over the scattered makeup on the surface. Even that hasn't gone right, your normal safeties failing you when you need them most. 

Maybe this was all a sign from the universe. You and Clark have been friends since you could walk, what if this stupid date was going to ruin everything between you?

Sighing, you reach for the only framed picture in your room. It’s silly, something Martha took when you were both too busy playing to see her. You and Clark, freshly five, sit around your old purple play table, the both of you covered in glitter and rocking some of the biggest tutus you’ve ever seen. You’re yelling at him in the picture, probably telling him to put his pinky up when he drinks his tea, and he’s just grinning at you.

It’s funny how that smile never changed. Something warm unfurls and blooms in your chest the longer you look at the picture. It’s Clark, he doesn’t care what you wear or if you’ve put on makeup or not. You both loved each other long before that was ever a problem, and it’s not going to start being one now. 

Sucking in a deep breath you put on the first outfit you’d picked out, a simple white sundress. You rarely get to wear it, anyway. Might as well test it out now. You check the mirror one last time just as someone knocks on your bedroom door. 

Clark calls out your name on the other side, sounding hesitant. “Sorry, um,” he chuckles and you can picture the way he must be nervously rubbing the back of his neck. “I got here a little early.”

You dart away from the mirror, kicking all the clothes under your bed. You slide the makeup into your desk drawer to be dealt with later. For now, you just need to make sure that he doesn’t see what a hot mess your room is. 

Sucking in a deep breath, you tug the hem of your dress down and shake off your worries. This is Clark. Your Clarkie, the boy you’ve tormented since you were a toddler. There’s nothing to worry about. 

“You’re always early, Clark,” you tell him with a soft smile as you open the door. 

His eyes widen slightly as he looks down at you. You did purposefully pick a dress that would emphasize certain aspects of yours. The pink flush on his cheeks is entirely worth it. Your eyes are drawn to the bunch of flowers in his hand and you grin. “Are those for me?” You gush, opening your door wider for him to step inside. 

“Yeah,” he holds them out to you, blue eyes stuck on yours. “I thought you might like them.” You bring them closer to your face, taking in the faint scent of the roses. 

“I love them, thank you,” you find yourself unable to stop smiling as you drop the roses in a glass of water by your bed. After building up your hopes and anxieties for a week because of this date, you're struggling to calm yourself down. 

Turning, you find him already looking at you with a soft smile that calms your racing heart just a bit. “I’ve been looking forward to this for a while,” he tells you, taking a step closer to you. His hands find your own, pulling you into him. “Not just the date,” he amends, smile stretching wider. “Asking you out. I think our friends were getting sick of listening to me talk about you all the time.”

You laugh, “I think they were getting sick of both of us. I feel so oblivious that it took me so long to realize you felt the same way.” 

He huffs, though his tone remains good-natured, “How do you think I feel?”

“Well,” you lace your fingers with his and step closer, “we’re doing it now, that’s what matters.” He ducks down and you feel your breath stutter, but he only leaves a brief kiss on your cheek, pulling back with a sheepish expression. A gentleman through and through. 

You’d never thought that knowing Clark for as well and as long as you have could be a bad thing. But now, sitting in The Talon and awkwardly dipping your fries in ketchup just to have something to do, you’re starting to realize it is. Being with each other nearly every day leaves you wanting for conversation. You both are already so caught up on what’s going on in each other’s lives that you’re struggling not to just bring up the weather. 

Clark groans and you startle, the noise breaking through the thick silence between you. He leans back in the booth, head resting on the edge and you find your eyes drawn to the strong muscles of his neck, the way his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. 

Clearing your throat you glance away from him and push your plate away. “I didn’t want it to be like this,” Clark mutters, more to himself than you, but you hear him anyway. 

“It’s, well,” you pause, struggling for the words. Letting out a self-deprecating laugh, you shake your head. “I just don’t know what to do when we’re like this,” he peeks an eye open and you gesture between the two of you. 

His lips quirk up and he straightens once more. “I feel like I should be able to talk to you, same as always. But I don't know what to say, I don’t want to risk messing this up.” He trails off, glancing away from you and swallowing roughly. The same dreaded panic you’ve been feeling all week is thick in his voice. 

“Clark,” you utter his name lowly, reaching your hand out across the table. He’s slow to meet your eyes. “I feel the same way. We’re being stupid because I know that nothing you could say is going to change how I feel about you.” You narrow your eyes, taking on a teasing tone, “And you better feel the same way,” you scold. 

He huffs out a laugh, larger hand enveloping yours entirely and squeezing gently, “You know I do.”

You shrug, “Then we’re just being stupid, again,” you add, rolling your eyes. 

His eyes light up with mischief, a smile spreading as he stands from his seat. You jump back slightly, surprised by the sudden movement. “I’ve got an idea, come on,” he holds his hand out and you take it once more. 

You let out a surprised laugh as he takes off, dragging you out of the Talon behind him. “Where are we going?” 

He pauses for a moment, looking over his shoulder at you. It awes you, just how handsome he is. “It’s a surprise,” he winks and tugs you closer. 

“Your surprise is… the school?” You frown, taking Clark’s hand as he helps you down from the truck. 

“No,” he defends, shooting you a sarcastic look as he closes the door behind you. “We’re sneaking onto the field, like we used to. Maybe a little jog down memory lane will help,” he gives you a cheesy smile and you feel like you might melt.  

The sun hangs low on the horizon, its fading golden hues painting the sky in soft oranges and purples. The light catches in Clark’s hair, casting a warm halo around him. Sometimes he seems so overwhelmingly perfect that you wonder if you’ll ever be enough for him. Even when you were beginning to give up hope, he comes up with something so sweet, so thoughtful, that all you want to do is kiss him. 

Swallowing down the urge, you place your hand in his and let him lead you around the side of the school. “You know, we only used to do this to mess with the football players,” you tease. “Hard to do when you’re on the team, Clarkie.”

He huffs out a laugh. “Hey, we can still tear the seams on their jerseys- just not mine.” He throws you a grin, and it sends a rush of warmth through your chest.

The familiar path behind the school is darker now, but your steps fall in sync like muscle memory. The fence around the field looms ahead, a little more daunting than normal. It’s harder to climb in your dress, but Clark gives you a boost. One so strong you nearly fly over. 

Landing with a huff, you turn to glare at him as he pulls himself over with ease. “Too much torque in the thrust, Clark,” you grumble, brushing off your hands. 

He chuckles, throwing an arm over your shoulders as you both step onto the field. “Come on, we should get down there before the sun’s gone.”

Dew from the grass seeps its way into the thin fabric of your shoes as you walk toward the center of the field. The bleachers stand empty, the goalposts stretch high into the deepening sky, and for the first time tonight, you feel like you can take a breath. 

Clark shrugs off his jacket, laying it out on the grass and motioning for you to sit. You hesitate for a moment, but then you look down at the white fabric of your dress and decide you’re okay with sacrificing Clark’s jacket.

Clark lowers himself beside you, leaning back on his palms as he gazes up at the sky. The last streaks of sunlight fade, and one by one, the stars blink to life above you. You’ve always thought the sky above Smallville was different than anywhere else. As if the stars were reaching out to you. Considering your track record with meteors, it doesn’t seem that far off. 

For a while, neither of you speak. The quiet is comfortable, not at all like the stilted silence you’d felt in the diner. You’re content just being here with him, under the vast, endless sky. 

Clark is the first to break the peace. He shifts beside you, drawing in a slow breath as he disrupts the silence. “I’ve,” he hesitates on the word, “cared about you for a long time,” he admits, voice low and steady. “Longer than I ever told you.”

You glance over at him and find his gaze fixed on the stars. His jaw is tense, like he’s bracing himself for you to tell him this was all one big mistake and you’re better off as friends. A smile pulls at your lips at the ridiculous thought and you reach toward the small space between you both. Placing your hand over his, he finally looks at you. 

“I know things are,” he pauses, “a little weird between us right now.” He looks at your hand and flips his palm so he can lace your fingers together. “But I don’t want to lose what we have. If you’re willing to make it work, I am too.”

Your heart stutters, and for a moment all you can do is stare at him. At the boy who’s always been there, the boy who, despite everything, still makes your heart race. Your smile spreads, “Of course I’m willing,” you whisper. 

His breath hitches, and then he grins, the same grin that will never fail to make you lightheaded with infatuation.

Clark was meant to be here an hour ago. You’d made plans to go to a screening of some old movies at the theater. Sitting on the steps of your front porch, head propped in your hand, you look out at the farmlands around you. He only lives a few minutes away from you, you can’t fathom why he would be so late. 

You’d like to give him the benefit of the doubt, he’s not the type of guy to just leave you hanging. But there’s something humiliating about sitting out here all on your own. The wind has already fussed and ruined the hairstyle you’d so meticulously worked on. You’d already missed half of one of the movies. And the sun is beginning to set. 

Part of you is begging to just go inside and give up, but you're more stubborn half won't give in. Clark isn't like this, he wouldn't do something like this without good reason. 

A rumble sounds down the highway and your head perks up, crestfallen look replaced with something more hopeful. Getting to your feet, you grimace at the pins and needles tingling down your legs. Walking down the steps and getting a good look at the approaching motorcycle, your stomach plummets. 

Not Clark, then, though it’s odd to see someone beside you or the Kent’s driving on this stretch of road. Your hand tightens around the hem of your tank top as the motorcycle begins to slow as it approaches your house. Heart picking up, you take a step back toward the safety of the porch. 

Maybe they just need directions or maybe…

Your brain breaks for a moment as the rider pulls into your driveway. 

Maybe they’re Clark. 

Your jaw drops as he shoots you a smarmy grin, getting off his father’s bike and striding toward you with a swagger you’re unused to. “Hiya, sweetheart." You take a step back from him, brows furrowed. 

“Clark,” you spit his name out in shock, eyes darting between him and the bike. Knowing that he’s not dying somewhere in a ditch, your anger at being left waiting surges forth. “You’re an hour late because you were busy stealing your dad’s bike?” You demand, trying to ignore just how good he looks leaning against the post of your porch in that ridiculous leather jacket. 

“Sure,” he chuckles and rolls his eyes, brushing past you and heading back to the bike. “That’s why,” he snaps, like you’re slow. He straddles the bike and nods you forward. “You coming or not?”

Sucking in a sharp breath, you glance between him and the front door of your house. Again, giving him the benefit of the doubt, you choose to get on the back of the bike. Maybe this is all just one big act that he’s putting on to surprise you with something at the theater. 

He turns the key and you frown, “Helmet?” You ask weakly. He doesn’t respond, just laughs and peels out of your driveway. You squeal, grabbing on tight to his waist and burying your face in his back. 

This isn’t an act, and this definitely isn’t Clark. But whoever he is, you just got on the back of his motorcycle like an idiot. 

With every turn and rev of the bike, you prepare to feel the pavement beneath your palms. Still, as reckless and nauseating as his driving is, he manages to get you here in one piece. Though, where here is, you’re not sure. 

Clark swings off the bike effortlessly, grinning over his shoulder at a group of girls walking into the building behind him. He doesn’t seem to notice, or care, about the way your hands still tremble from the ride. You’d been too busy clutching onto him for dear life to pay any attention to where you were going and you’re starting to regret it. 

The building is nothing more than dirtied brick, the faded neon sign above the door advertising beer and live music. The bass thumps from inside, vibrating the gravel beneath your feet. From within, you hear jeering shouts, the telltale sounds of a crowd on the verge of chaos.

“Clark,” despite his odd behavior, you still find yourself stepping toward him and holding tight to his hand. The sheltered life of Smallville hasn’t exactly prepared you for backwoods, seedy bars. “Where are we?” You peer up at him and the glint in his eyes makes your stomach clench with trepidation. 

“Oh,” he laughs, tugging you toward the entrance, “you’re gonna like this,” he swears. Despite the way you dig your heels into the dirt, he keeps pulling, giving you no choice but to follow him into the bar. 

The air changes as you step inside, it’s worse than you thought it would be. Thick with heat and smoke, it pulses with the heavy bass of a song you don’t recognize. Multicolored lights flash across the writhing bodies on the dance floor. The scent of spilled beer, sweat, and something sticky clings to the air. 

Your fingers tighten around Clark’s arm as he moves forward, practically wrapping yourself around him. He weaves through the crowd like he belongs here. If you let go now, you know he wouldn’t stop, he’d just keep going, leaving you all alone in a place you want no part of.  

Clark drags you to the edge of the bar and slips a crumpled twenty across the counter. Wordlessly, and without checking for IDs, the bartender slides over two beers. Clark grabs one and to your utter shock, tilts it back, downing one long gulp. 

“You gonna stand there watching me,” he challenges, “or are you finally going to let loose and have some fun?”

“No, Clark, I’m not drinking. And neither should you! You’re driving us back,” you snap, eyes darting around the seedy crowd. 

Settling the half-empty bottle on the counter, he smirks, “Relax. We’re here to have a good time,” his tone almost sounds like a threat. Have a good time or else…

His gaze flickers toward the dance floor and your heart sinks at the mischief in his expression. “And I know exactly how to help you loosen up.”

Again, he gives you no time to protest or even form an opinion before he grabs you and pulls you toward the center of the dance floor. You feel like a leashed dog, no choice but to obey. 

The music shifts into something darker, slower, a sultry beat thrumming through the air. It charges the atmosphere of the dancers and the crowd sways, bodies pressed tightly together as they move with the rhythm. 

“Clark,” you glance around at the writhing bodies and swallow thickly. “I don’t-”

“Just one dance,” he cuts you off smoothly, voice low and coaxing. His lips curl up in a gentle smile as his hands find your waist. His grip is tight but not uncomfortable as he helps move your hips into the rhythm of the song. “Trust me.”

You hesitate, but it’s easier than you thought to simply fall into the slow, lazy grind of the dance. Your body moves in sync with his, despite the apprehension tightening through you. There’s something wrong with him, that’s clear enough. This isn’t the Clark you know, this is some bold, almost predatory version of him. 

One of his hands drifts up from your waist, dragging the hem of your thin tank top up slightly as his fingers brush against the nape of your neck. A shiver runs down your spine as his grip tightens, tilting your head back. You press your hands against his chest, eyes rounding in confusion. 

“Clark,” you whisper his name, breathless from the proximity. “What are you-”

He cuts you off, voice rough and breath warm against your lips, “Finally taking what I want.” His head dips down, lips capturing your own. It’s not the soft, gentle first kiss you’d always imagine you would share with him. This is hard, demanding. 

He’s claiming you, marking his territory as he slips his hand lower on your waist. He pulls you flush against him, hips pressing against yours. A heat slowly spreads in you, but it's overshadowed by the overwhelming feeling that this isn’t Clark. 

You push against his chest and you know he lets you go, the situation still under his control. He backs off with an irritated look, eyes narrowed down at you. 

Your breath comes in quick, uneven gasps as you stare up at him. “What the hell, Clark?”

“What’s your problem?” He snaps, hand flexing around your neck before dropping to his side. 

“You,” you hiss, eyes narrowing. “You’re not yourself, Clark.”

His jaw tenses, fists clenching by his side as he takes a step back from you. “Why? Because I’m finally doing what I want?” His voice is sharp, it bites at the fraying edges of your patience. The music around you picks up pace and somebody slams into you from behind. 

With a pained gasp, you stumble forward, rubbing the sore spot where their elbow had slammed into your ribs. Clark watches it all with a bored look. Gone is the gentle, considerate boy you’ve known your whole life. This boy before you is reckless and selfish, you don’t want anything to do with him. 

His attention flickers past you and you turn to follow his gaze. A pretty blonde sways in the middle of the dance floor, hips moving gracefully as her laughter rings above the music. Without a word or a second glance, he steps around you, striding toward her with the same effortless confidence he just used on you. 

Frozen by disbelief and anger, you watch as he slides a hand around her waist, murmuring something in her ear that makes her giggle. The crowd shifts again, blocking your view of the two. It’s for the better as you suck in sharp breaths, trying to keep the tears at bay. 

A lump clogs your throat and you rush toward the back of the bar, hoping there might be a bathroom to hide in. You just need a second away from the sweat and noise of the dancers. You stumble through a stained door and slam it closed behind you, wiping desperately at the tears rolling down your cheeks. 

After splashing cold water over your face and simply standing in there for a few minutes, you finally feel stable enough to go back outside. You’re just going to ask Clark to take you home and then you hope you never have to see him again. 

But when you return to the dance floor, heart still pounding its way up your throat, you can’t find Clark. You can’t even find the blonde. He’s acting like a jackass, but there’s no way he would just leave you. 

Right?

You rush outside, your stomach dropping like a stone when you see the parking lot. The motorcycle is gone. 

He left you behind. 

“Thank you,” your gaze stays trained on your hands, not ready to look at Lex. You feel his stare boring into the side of your head before he turns back to the road. 

“You don’t have to thank me. I’m glad you called me instead of trying to get home on your own.” He pauses, hand tightening on the steering wheel as he takes in a deep breath. “But what were you doing in a place like that?”

You slump in the passenger seat, rubbing a tired hand over your face. All you want to do is go home and wash this night away. You’re hesitant to tell him the truth, knowing he might give Clark hell for leaving you there. A part of you is still primed to protect him, but the other part, the one that was just left behind, can’t care. 

“Clark,” you tell him and his head whips around so fast you’re surprised you don't hear it snap. “He was acting weird tonight. Took me there and then left with another girl.”

“Are you serious?” He demands, sounding angry on your behalf. Right now, though, you don’t have the energy for anger. “Clark wouldn’t do that.”

You suck in a deep breath and finally look at him, “The one I know wouldn’t,” you offer vaguely, ignoring his confused expression. “Honestly, I just want to get home and never talk to him again.”

Lex chuckles a little, “You don’t mean that.”

“Try me,” you snap, glaring out the window. You’re debating calling Clark’s dad and telling him that Clark took the bike. If not just for petty revenge. Just the thought of it makes you feel tired. 

“I’m sure,” Lex starts, already sounding like he doesn’t believe himself, “he had a perfectly reasonable explanation for what he did.” You roll your eyes, giving him a deadpan look. His hand lifts slightly off the wheel in surrender. “There’s no excuse,” he amends.

“No, there’s not.” The car rolls to a stop and you look out the window, surprised to already be at your house. The porch light is off, your parents must already be asleep. “I really can’t thank you enough,” you tell Lex, offering him a weak but grateful smile. 

He waves you off, “Forget it, I’m glad I could help. If you ever need anything else…” He trails off, leaving the offer open-ended. 

You nod, opening the passenger door and stepping out. You’re just about to close it when something occurs to you. Clark always gives you a ride to school, you’re not going to have a way to get there after tonight. 

“Oh,” you groan, pinching the bridge of your nose in irritation. 

“What’s wrong?” Lex looks concerned and you offer him an apologetic grimace. 

“I actually do need something,” you tell him, sheepish and pleading. 

Clark wakes up with a fog clouding his mind, a dull pounding behind his eyes. Vague flashes of memory flicker through the haze. The sound of your upset voice, the thrum of music, and the feeling of your body pressed against his. It makes his cheeks flush with warmth, but none of it connects for him. Everything’s one frustrating blur. 

But he can figure that out later, his gaze drifts toward the clock on his nightstand and his eyes widen. He leaps off the bed, nearly tripping as he gets wrapped up in his sheets. He was meant to pick you up ten minutes ago. 

Clark throws on the first clothes he finds, raking a hand through his messy hair as he bolts down the stairs. His backpack is nearly left by the door as he rushes out. If he could, he’d run you to school. It would be so much faster, so much easier. But that would require explaining why he could do that, and he doesn’t think you’d appreciate him springing the truth of his abilities on you this early in the morning. 

You’re not exactly a morning person. 

He speeds down the road, the truck’s tires kicking up dust as he pulls into your driveway. Throwing the truck in park he doesn’t even bother cutting the engine before leaping out. Two steps at a time, he bounds up your front porch and knocks firmly on the door. 

His foot taps against the wood of the porch as he checks the watch on his wrist. If you hurry, you might both be able to make it to first period on time. After a minute of silence he knocks again, but he’s greeted with the same silence. 

He steps back, brows knitted together, and his gaze flickers toward the front window. He ignores the feeling of being a complete creeper as he peers through the glass. The house looks unnaturally still, none of your usual morning mess as you rush to get ready on time. The lights are off and he can’t hear anything inside. 

Your parents are usually gone before you even wake up. He can’t think of anyone else who would give you a ride. Or why you would even have anyone else drive you. A strange unease coils in his stomach and another brief memory flashes through his mind. It’s not much, just a pretty blonde smiling up at him. 

Jaw tightening, Clark turns back to his truck, climbing inside and heading straight for school. He’s sure everything’s fine. You probably had Chloe or Lana pick you up. Still, even with him being ten minutes late, he’s not sure how they would have gotten to your house before him. 

Pulling into the parking lot he frowns, greeted first thing in the morning by Lex’s ridiculously overpriced sports car. It’s parked right in front of the entrance and he wonders what business Lex would have at the high school. 

The passenger door opens and you step out, your bag slung over one shoulder. You turn to Lex, smiling as you give him a sweet wave. Clark watches it all with his shoulders tensed as something sharp and hot twists in Clark’s chest. 

He watches as Lex pulls out of the parking lot, jaw clenched in irritation. He throws the truck into park and gets out, heading toward the front doors. Inside, the hallways seem more crowded than usual but he still manages to make you out almost instantly. 

You’re at your locker, pulling out books as if nothing’s wrong. As if you didn’t get a ride with Lex Luthor and ditch him for seemingly no reason at all. 

Clark makes a beeline for you, tightening his grip on his backpack as he stops beside your locker. “Hey,” he calls, forcing a smile. “Did I miss something? I thought I was picking you up this morning.”

You don’t even bother looking at him, eyes stubbornly pointed forward. “Guess I made other plans.”

The coldness in your voice stops him in his tracks. His stomach drops, smile faltering as you continue to pretend there’s anything more for you to grab from your locker. “Okay…” He exhales slowly. “Did something happen?”

You slam your locker shut and he jumps. Whipping around to face him, your eyes are dark with anger as you glare up at him. “Really?” You snap and his eyes widen in surprise. “This is what you’re doing, pretending you don’t remember?”

Clark blinks, thrown off by the heat in your voice. “I-”

“Forget it,” you cut him off. You shake your head, looking tired. “Just leave me alone, Clark. Seems to be something you’re good at, anyway.” You whip around, storming off down the hall and leaving him reeling. He wants to go after you but you’re already slipping into your English class and he knows there’s no way he’ll be able to talk to you in there. 

He hovers in the hallway, stunned. What the hell happened last night?

His mind races, grasping at the fleeting memories. There was a bar, he’s not even sure how he found that place. He was dancing with you and then kissing you. His eyes widen at that, grimacing at the blurred memory of your rough first kiss. He’d been hoping for something a little sweeter than some backwoods bar. 

He remembers you being angry at him but that’s it. There are holes and gaps that he can’t remember no matter how hard he tries. There’s only one thing that could explain the reckless behavior, the memory gaps, and the way he felt like someone else.

Red kryptonite. 

His heart sinks and his head falls into his hands. He hurt you and probably scared you. You don’t even want to look at him now. Straightening up, he runs a hand through his hair and tries to think of a way to fix all of this. 

He’s not sure he can, not when he can’t even remember what he’s done to you. 

Admittedly, ambushing you outside of class probably wasn’t the best way to go about this. But he needed to make sure you couldn’t run from him. You walk out the door, books clutched to your chest, and head down. 

Clark falls into step beside you and you briefly glance up, rolling your eyes when you realize it’s him. You pick up your pace, clearly trying to put space between the both of you. “Wait,” he calls, stepping in front of you. “One chance to explain, please.”

You stop in the middle of the hall, uncaring to the students parting around you. “Clark-”

“I don’t remember everything,” he admits, voice low and desperate as he pushes through your objection. “But I know something happened. And I need to fix this.”

Exhaling sharply, you can’t seem to meet his eye. “There’s nothing to fix.”

That can’t be true. He won’t let that be true. “Please,” he presses. “Just… one chance.”

For a moment, you hesitate, teeth pressing into your lower lip as you take a step back from him. “Fine,” you relent, sounding wholly reluctant. “We’ll talk after school.”

Relief floods through him and he finally manages a real smile for the first time all morning. “Okay,” he utters, trying not to sound surprised. “Great, I’ll drive you home, and-”

“No,” you cut him off, shaking your head. “Lex is giving me a ride,” he opens his mouth to protest and you shoot him a sharp look. His jaw snaps closed and he sighs. “I’ll meet you at your house later,” you tell him, leaving no room for argument. 

His stomach twists as you turn and walk away. Lex, he scoffs and shakes his head. When did the two of you get close? One bad night and you’re already done with him?

The thought should fill him with anger, but it only makes his worry grow. Whatever he had done last night must have been truly awful. He hates that there’s a chance he won’t be able to fix this. But what makes it worse is knowing that it’s all his fault.

Clark’s in his room when he hears you pull up to the house. He doesn’t waste any time as he heads down the stairs. “What happened to ‘I never want to see him again?’” Clark has no shame as he listens to your conversation. He doesn’t appreciate how comfortable Lex sounds teasing you. 

“Yeah, well,” your voice loses its muffled edge as you open the passenger door. “I deserve an explanation.”

“Call me if you need anything,” Lex tells you as Clark opens his front door. Rolling his eyes, Clark jogs down the steps of his porch, heading toward you both. You turn over your shoulder, smile falling as you nod your head in greeting. 

Clark’s waited forever to finally tell you how he really feels about you. Years of pining all led to that one moment where you told him that you feel the same way. He’d finally gotten a chance with you, to be with you like he always wanted. He’s not going to let last night ruin everything. 

“Thanks, Lex,” you mutter, closing the passenger door and marching toward Clark. Lex lingers for a moment and Clark sends him a stiff smile and wave. Lex returns it with a smirk before driving off. 

“So,” arms crossed across your chest, you glance up at him with barely veiled apprehension. “Are we going inside?”

Clark glances back at his house and shakes his head. He holds his hand out to you and you give him a wary glare. “Please,” he asks, and after a moment you place your hand in his. He smiles and leads you to the barn. 

Call it nostalgia, call it desperation but whatever compelled you to actually hear Clark out can go bite it. He abandoned you at a club in a town you hadn’t even heard of. To go be with another girl, no less. You shouldn’t have even stopped to listen to him in the hallway. It’s a lack of self-respect, really. 

But there was something in his eyes that compelled you to stay. Last night, he’d been a stranger wearing Clark’s face. This morning, you saw the earnest sincerity you always do when you look into those pretty blue eyes of his. Giving in was an inevitability. 

Walking the familiar path to the barn you’re struck with a feeling almost like grief. Whatever could have bloomed between you and Clark feels like sand falling through your fingers. Unless he’s about to open those doors and reveal an evil twin, you’re not sure you could ever forgive him. 

Clark glances over his shoulder at you, a gentle smile pulling at the corners of his lips. He throws the doors of the barn open and you roll your eyes at the dramatics. You slip past him and head inside, stopping short once you see what he’s done. 

Fairy lights dangle above the loft, illuminating what looks like a poorly built blanket fort. Christmas lights he clearly stole from his mom are hung haphazardly from the rafters. You can see the effort he put into making the barn feel special, even if the execution is lacking.

It’s the nostalgia of it all that makes you smile. Summer’s spent camping out in the barn, hidden away under blanket forts, and trying to scare each other with your bad ghost stories. It’s a time capsule of your childhood. And you know what he’s trying to do, how he’s trying to soften the hard edges of your resentment. You hate that it’s beginning to work. 

Clark heads up to the loft first, glancing over his shoulder and motioning for you to follow. You sigh, face blank as you work to keep up the cool exterior you feel slowly melting away. He offers his hand as you reach the top, and after a beat of hesitation, you reluctantly take it. 

Clark pulls you forward and keeps your hand in his as he leads you to sit down across from him. Sinking back into the plush pillows and blankets you prop your head in your hand, watching him with a bored expression. Sucking in a deep breath, he rubs his hands along the surface of his jeans, avoiding your eyes for a moment. 

“I didn’t want our first kiss to be in some bar.” He chuckles awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck before finally meeting your eyes. “I didn’t want our first anything to be there. I wanted it to be somewhere like this, somewhere that actually meant something to us.” 

His throat bobs as he swallows. Then he leans closer, reaching across the space between you, his fingers curling around yours again. The warmth of his palm is comforting, even if you don’t let him see that. “I don’t want to lose my best friend. I don’t want to lose you, you have to believe me. What happened last night, it wasn’t me.”

Your expression hardens and you yank your hand from his, putting distance between you. Clark’s face flickers with hurt, but you ignore it. “Why should I believe anything you say, Clark? What happened last night was an eye-opener. Clearly, we’re better off just being friends.”

He sucks in a sharp breath, looking like you’ve just punched him in the gut. “You don’t mean that,” he murmurs. 

“Don’t I?”

Clark drops his head into his hands, fingers threading through his hair. His shoulders curl inward, and for a long while, he doesn’t speak. The silence between you stretches, thick with unspoken words. 

Maybe it would be better for you to just leave. Some space might do both of you good, and help you come to terms with the truth of it all. 

This was never going to work. 

Clark exhales slowly, then straightens, blue eyes meeting yours with an intensity that catches you off guard. “Alright,” he nods, some internal battle going on that you’re not privy to. “Stand by the window.”

Your brows furrow and you shake your head. “What?”

“Do it,” he tells you, tone firm, and you find yourself struggling for a reason not to listen. Finally, with a reluctant huff, you get up and go stand by the window. 

The golden fields stretch before you bathed in the warm glow of the setting sun. The wheat sways gently in the evening breeze. Utterly boring and un-fascinating. 

You roll your eyes, “Clark, I swear-” 

A distant whistle cuts through the air. You whip around, expecting to see Clark behind you and instead find the loft empty. Your stomach tightens and you turn back to the window. A flicker of movement catches your attention, “What the…”

You press against the window, squinting at the field below. That’s when you see him. A very small Clark waves from the middle of the wheat, far too distant for how quickly he got there. Your breath catches and you find yourself waving back without thinking. 

There’s no possible way he crossed all that in under thirty seconds. 

But he’s not satisfied with just an impressive show of speed. Clark disappears and then reappears right below the barn window. Only, he’s not alone. 

Above his head, with terrifying ease, he’s holding a goddamn tractor. Your heart slams against your ribs. “Clark!” You shout, terrified this little stunt of his is going to end with him sandwiched into the dirt. He sets it down casually, as if it weighs nothing. 

A gust of wind pushes your hair forward and you turn sharply. Clark stands behind you now, cheeks flushed, a sheepish smile tugging at his lips. “What the hell was that?” You demand, eyes darting between him and the tractor outside.

“It’s what I wanted to tell you. What I’ve always wanted to tell you,” he concedes, his smile faltering slightly, his voice tinged with something vulnerable. 

Still stunned, you sink onto the couch as he begins to explain. About the crash landing. About his powers. How he’s different.  

Your best friend- your almost-boyfriend, is an alien. 

Of all the things racing through your mind, only one question comes to mind. “Why have you never told me?” You don’t ask him if he was from Jupiter or Mars, or if he’s got a secret eye hidden somewhere. You just want to know why he didn’t think he could trust you. 

Clark hesitates. Then, in a voice barely above a whisper, he says, “I was afraid you wouldn’t want me anymore. That you’d see me as some freak.”

You snort, “You’re an idiot is what you are.”

 His head snaps up, blinking at you in surprise. “Clark, why would I ever care about what planet you’re from?” You shake your head, a smile creeping onto your lips as you shift forward, kneeling in front of him. Your hands find his, squeezing slightly. Then, hesitantly, you reach up, cupping his cheek. A smile spreads across your face as he leans into the touch. “I care about you, not about what rocket you crash-landed in.”

“More of a pod,” he corrects and you shoot him a sharp look that makes him laugh. He sobers quickly, smile fading, “I understand if you can’t forgive me for last night.”

“Well,” you muse, tilting your head. “It wasn’t really you, right? It was that krypto- karo-”

“Kryptonite,” he grins a little at the way you stumble over the word. “And, yes, it was. I would never purposefully hurt you, but it’s not an excuse.”

“It’s actually the only acceptable excuse,” you tell him, rolling your eyes playfully. “That or evil twin.” Clark’s eyes widen slightly and you narrow yours. “Do you actually have an evil twin?” You shake your head, “Never mind, we’ll talk about that later.”

You glance up at the twinkling lights strung above, the warm glow making the loft feel impossibly soft, impossibly safe. “Clark?” You ask and he hums, already looking at you when you glance back at him. “We can always try that first kiss again.”

His smile, soft and sweet, mirrors your own. As you lean in, his arms circle your waist, pulling you gently into him. Your fingers thread through the soft tresses of his hair as his lips brush against yours, soft, lingering, right. 

This. This is what you knew it would feel like. This is home and safety, everything good in your life. You smile against Clark’s lips knowing that no matter what evil twins or toxic rocks come at you, you’ll face it together.

end. — I do not own the characters or the TV Show Smallville, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © scribes-of-valar 2025. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

[vldunchartedregions]

Voltron Season 8 Meta - The Ground Work

Before we start our episode-by-episode deep dive & broader analysis of Voltron Season 8...

I wanted to address our main philosophy and themes we will be touching on our journey together.

Firstly, every frame, expression, shot, angle, storyboard, character placement, dialogue? It is all intentionally chosen to cater to the story. Animation is expensive and Dreamworks banked on this show being the success. It was greenlit for 78 episodes off the bat, sectioned into 3 parts (26 episodes each).

MM: Okay. So at that time did you know it was a 78-episode contract?

JDS: Yes.

LM: Yes we did. That was probably one of our biggest lies. You know, sadly. We try not to lie too much, but I’ll tell you, I’m gonna blow-blow the whole industry up right now: if an animated show tells you they don’t know if they have a second season, they probably know they have a second season.

Let's Voltron - Episode 175 - Transcript by Team Purple Lion

---

Oh yes, Dreamworks & Netflix were banking on this project. Budget comes into play and the show would've had an overall budget set in stone for animation, voice actors, writers, background artists, the showrunners, directors, marketing, events, etc. the works.

Moving forward, we must keep this philosophy in mind - every decision reflected within an episode - the title, all frames, shots, character placements, and dialogue choices within an episode that we'll be dissecting always has the following:

Intentions - The What?

Motivation & Purpose - The Why?

In a great audiobook I listened to from Reggie Fils-Aimé, called Disrupting the Game (highly encourage you to listen to it if you're curious about his time as President of Nintendo), he goes through his career journey chapter-by-chapter, tells important stories that helped shape him into who he is, and then ends each chapter with "The Why."

Why am I saying this? ADHD, but I do also have a point; walk with me here.

We will be looking at each episode with the lens of dissecting the double meaning of the episode titles - including the what and the why; identifying the layers in each episode that reflect the title's original intention and purpose. Neil Kaplan explains this notion well with "Launch Date" in his interview with Afterbuzz TV (Season 8, Episode 1 & 2 Recap)

[Timestamped: 3:07] 2. We will be dissecting scenes with the notion of the "What & "Why?" - from character expressions, to placement, to how the edits in post-production that were requested disrupts all of the original intentions of the episode and/or shots.

3. We will be looking towards my secret source (apologies to you all, but I'm NOT revealing who it is - sit down with some popcorn instead and enjoy the ride) with the information they have provided + other sources of information we've uncovered or have been informed of, to make informed conclusions with evidentiary support. Every step we take will be an informed conclusion.

In short, everything has a purpose and we will be walking through all of this with some lovely nuggets of (alleged) truth to feed our conclusions from my sources.

We also must keep in mind: explanations, intentions, and motivations can change throughout this meta. Our conclusions now might not be the ones we decipher later on. Not everything we know may be the truth, and even if we are to assume that what I've been told is all facts (allegedly; for entertainment purposes only), some facts even from my source may shift our current knowledge into a new truth.

When I tell you we have been binge watching these episodes again, and again, and tearing them apart limb from limb with the information we have, we are not exaggerating. We keep uncovering more with each rewatch and my friends, it is fascinating.

With ALL of this in mind, let's dive into some of the broader themes of Season 8:

In the first half of Season 8, we are shown that the paladins have not always made the correct decisions in their time defending the universe. Their actions DO have consequences, and their decision making from the past bites them in the ass.

...Case in point. 2. In the second half of Season 8, we unlock a few new themes: Love, Rebellion, & Redemption.

We will also address the Macross Theory™ Love Triangle.

Religious themes that go much deeper into the show than we initially thought. Further influence from many mecha shows (oh yes, this includes Evangelion here, friends - get in the robot, Lance).

Please see a screenshot from a DM from my valuable source from New Year's Day:

I was going to censor this message a little... however, I think it's a bit more fun to give you a teaser for what's to come. It's probably not what you're expecting.

Again, I must implore to you all - these changes were asked for last minute, hence why Season 8 is such a hard watch to old fans and new:

It was DONE. COMPLETE. FINISHED.

BEFORE Season 7 dropped.

They were ready to take a grand ol' break before Season 8 was meant to drop. Walk the dogs, paint some walls, eat some food. Y'know, they were on holiday mode - ready to book flights, job well done team!!

There was an incredible story awaiting us that unfortunately ended up on the cutting-room floor. This was even mentioned by LM at the NYCC panel in 2018, but for this purpose, I'll use a quote from the Afterbuzz TV podcast - February 25th, 2019:

LM: It was–there’s a ton of stuff that just hit the-hit the, kinda, cutting room floor, storyboard-wise, just because we didn’t have the time and so we’re looking like, it’s a kids’ show technically still, even though we’re trying to make it more than that. You have a-a scene that’s basically an act long that’s just in a white floaty space with people talking about, like, you know–

JDS: Bigger emotional stuff-

LM: Yeah. And, uh, you know, letting that go any longer than that is just like, “You can’t do it!”

ABTV Voltron February 25 Season Review with Showrunners in Studio - Transcript by Team Purple Lion

---

Now that's all addressed, I do want to lay some ground rules as we proceed through this meta. I'm going to sound like a broken record, but I want to make this clear to the fandom:

It was NEVER the crew, cast, or showrunners intention for Season 8 to pan out this way. They had an entirely different vision as to where the show was heading + they were probably confident it wouldn't be changed by the time they finished it. There was direct, last minute, executive intervention here. Do not hunt down all parties for this as it has been several years.

We implore you to approach this meta with empathy and kindness. How heartbreaking would it be to be the crew, let alone the showrunners, to be asked to amend and revise all of Season 8 after painstaking, hard work and having the season done already? With NO budget left? You can agree to disagree with me here, but this is how we will be approaching this meta. Be kind.

Your feelings are valid - abusive, unwarranted behaviours and opinions are not. We were not there and we don't know the full story and how it unfolded, no matter how much context and bits of information we were given. We DO have evidentiary support to fuel this meta and piece together a look at what may have been the original ending (allegedly; don't get me wrong) but I wanted to make this clear - no sending hate to anyone.

In light of all of this, let us begin with a teaser: I'll share one confirmation I had from my source...

Lotor was meant to be brought back to life from the rift.

Check out my Twitter page for any and all updates in regards to this insanely detailed meta; including teasers and screenshots! Please and thank you.

---

Disclaimer: The one thing I humbly request is PLEASE... No hate towards the showrunners, cast, crew, or the official Voltron IP holders. There's a lot that has changed culturally and intrinsically within the industry over the years and this outcome was not something they could simply control. Let's be adults, look at this open conversation with empathy and love, and respectfully, let's indulge in this topic with grace - your feelings, however, are incredibly valid when it comes to this meta and what we uncover, as there's many alleged finds that may shock the fandom.

[flythesail]

I can't believe shows can just be completely erased. It's so so wrong.

[theultracharmingladynoire]

This has been a rant building up for a while now and I just need to put it in here but it's that. I remember the joy and excitement I felt when I watched y/o/i ep 1 - 10 because I literally. Knew nothing about the show except for the fact it was gay?? dvsjgshd but it just was so GOOD but then I. Came across a couple of interpretations of ep 11-12 (which I hadn't watched by then so I had no idea what went down) which was just people being disappointed, people thinking the ending was changed for a season 2, people thinking it was out of nowhere (especially V/ictor's comeback?? I guess??) And that really. messed up my perception of the show?? Like upto then I was forming my own interpretations of the characters and after this I. Was lowkey scared to watch the last two episodes because I was afraid of it being bad™ (if that even makes sense) and then one day even when I did watch them I didn't watch them properly?? Like I even missed a lot of scene and dialogue because I was too nervous about what I had read about it before.

And like. I don't even think those interpretations are entirely wrong for record. I understand that especially when there was a whole week between episodes and when the fandom was so huge and active people might have a very different viewing experience which directly plays into how they interpreted the character arcs! And those interpretation are extremely valid even though I disagree with them. The show definitely leaves a lot upto intrepretation of the viewers so there isn't any interpretation that is necessarily wrong™ (Idk how to phrase this sorry)

But it's just that I wasn't able to form MY own interpretation properly because I was influenced by others' ?? (In lack of a better way to word it) and I just. I've been mulling over this for a whole MONTH and going back and forth and back about the ending. And it just feels very draining when I go out to look for meta and people who had opinions similar to mine and find...like what ten people?? it kind of makes me feel like I am looking at things wrong, and that probably the finale WAS just bad or whatever (which seems to be a more common idea in what I've seen)

I do think there were pacing issues, and I do think the character arcs CAN be interpreted differently than what they are in the finale but I also am a bit sad that not many people tried to recontextualise the show in light of the finale (again, it isn't a MUST But I really wish people tried to if I am making sense?)

And it's sad because I know this can be fun if I just created my own bubble without all the meta and opinions I disagree with but it's hard when that is somehow always what I come across? And I KNOW I should stop reading a post when I see that it may suggest something towards the opinions that I disagree with (because that'll just waste my energy), but then what if I AM wrong? What if those posts are right and I am willingly closing my eye towards what the characters originally are or something?? Is what perplexes me out and really makes me sort of nervous and uneasy(?)

And now it is getting worse and I feel like I am slowly losing all the love I had for this show and it absolutely SUCKS because I just want to enjoy this silly little show and now this is all....just a mess

[kiss2012]

and what if i rewatch my favourite 911 eps

[neil-gaiman]

This may very well get lost in the flood, but if you see this, I just wanted to say that there were a lot of things I thought I wanted for good omens 2 (a happy ending for one, of course!)

But my favourite thing that a writer can do to my experience of a story is to make me go "okay forget EVERYTHING I said before, this is the outcome I didn't know I needed." This show took my hopes and said "no u don't actually :) i got something better" and it had the audacity to be SO RIGHT.

The finale I *thought* I wanted would have probably had me giggling and kicking my feet and then moving on with my day while in a bright mood for a bit.

The finale I got had me absolutely devastated, inconsolable for maybe an hour, and then just...immediately rewatching. And talking about it behind a fortress of spoiler tags. And writing, and drawing, and being invested in theories and trying to find all the easter eggs and just...falling in love with the story and the characters all over again. And I can tell that feeling will stay with me for a whole lot longer than a couple days.

I'm bad at brevity, I apologize! This is just a very long-winded way to say thank you (and thank you to everyone else on the team) for giving us these idiots (affectionately) to have Way Too Many Feelings about!! Thank you for sharing them with us.

I'm running GO in the background, crossing my fingers and looking forward to a season 3—whether or not it'll be what I'm *hoping* for, I am just beyond excited for whatever story it is that you want to tell us, and I trust that whatever it is, it will be wonderfully told! 🩶🩶

(But also, please, for your consideration...I am in fact soft and innocent, I can only take so much damage before I cry myself to critical dehydration—do with that what you must, I shall leave my electrolyte balance in your hands and hope for mercy. You did say everything would be okay, and thankfully we all know a writer would never lie!)

I wouldn't lie about that, anyway.

[ginnymoonbeam]

It's so weird to see people mad about the 4 Minutes finale when I feel like everything that happened was pretty much inevitable and very clearly set up the whole time. One of those "have we been watching the same show?" moments.

Anyway I thought it was a solid finale and a very good show overall. The theme of Great and Tyme being shitty people who got a chance to be less shitty through their near-death experiences was clearly emerging as of episode 3 or 4, and carried strongly in the end. The tragedy of Tonkla is a tragedy of the systems and powers trapping everyone in the story. I was rooting for him the whole time, but I never expected any different end for him - and I don't think that's the story saying anything about what he deserves, it's just a tragedy.

It was engaging, compelling, beautifully constructed, and I'm looking forward to a full rewatch.

[shiiro-arts]

Thank you so much for replying to my previous ask in such detail (I loved it and really, really appreciate your efforts 🙏)

I just started rewatching the anime and I saw the focus they kept on Lisanna hence my doubt. From Erza I felt it was more of a sibling type dynamic (that Erza sees Natsu and Gray more as her younger brothers) but they really pushed the Lisanna narrative in the beginning. And given the way he reacted differently to Lucy and Lisanna like becoming flustered with Lisanna I wondered.

Please do talk about the killing himself part too.

I love reading your analysis!! Thank you so much for your hard work ❣️ (Feel free to push in NaLu scenes that show it their bond more obviously)

Hi!! I'm happy you liked it, I'm going to try and talk about Natsu and Lisanna a little bit more and then I'll start with the whole killing himself thing. (following this post)

I think the reason they focused on Natsu and Lisanna at the beginning is because a lot of studios/mangakas have the need to create a couple, even better if it's an MC. And pairing Lucy and Natsu up from the beginning doesn't make any sense, they just met and didn't know each other.

Lisanna is a really important person to Natsu, although they hardly interact anymore.

She supported Natsu when he first came to the guild and became his first friend. Not only that, she helped him with Happy, hence the whole wife and husband thing, they represented a family.

Natsu is not as stupid as they make him out to be, he knows what marriage is, exclusivity to a partner

and things only adults are supposed to do.

He knew what Lisanna meant by "we'll get married in the future," and if she had never "died," NaLi would have made sense.

But it happend, Lisanna "died" and Natsu had to get over her. This doesn't mean forget her tho, as I said, Natsu LOVES his family and friends, forgetting about lisanna just because she died would not make any sense. It takes time to accept death, and after Igneel's disappearance, the death of lisanne hit him, HARD.

The only thing he could do was getting over her, but not forgetting her.

And that's when Lucy comes into the picture.

She keeps bumping into him, buys him food for "no reason" and talks all mighty and good about his family, basically, she gives him good vibes. He takes her to FT and for some reason she follows him everywhere and before he knows it, he wants to partner up with her.

This is development by natsu's part, he is ready to open up to new people (Lucy) and pretty much they become attached to the hip, because "she is nice", yeah, that's his reason.

Lisanna wasn't meant to come back, mashima himself said so, the only reason they brought her back was because the animation staff preasured him to because they liked her. NaLi is not happening because Mashima never had anything planned for her, and I'm not saying this because I'm a NaLu fan, it's just facts. Thats why she is so useless in the manga, because mashima doesn't know what to do with her. She is just there.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Let's beging with the whole suicide thing

I want to clarify that this is MY PERSPECTIVE, you might agree or disagree with me and thats completely fine.

Let me beging with one thing, and that is that natsu IS NOT SUICIDAL.

He wants to live his life at the fullest and he looks forward to the future.

Then why do I say he wanted to kill himself? because when lucy "died", he was so full of grief that he just didn't care any more.

One thing that they make clear is that the demons of zeref, once awaken, have only one thought in their minds: KILLING ZEREF

Lucy's "death" is what awoke END, Natsu felt so desperate and he was so full of grief that he literally abandoned his humanity.

She was gone and he blamed zeref, because if he had never started the war, she would be alive, that was enough for him to abandon his morals and look forward to kill someone.

Now comes the important part: his confrontation with grey

This part is really important because it shows that Natsu is aware of his actions.

If he really was completely possessed by END, then he would not have hesitated and warn grey about getting out of his way, he would have just killed him and keep going, but Natsu warns him several times

Until he doesn't give a damn anymore and attacks him.

Natsu was adamant about going after zeref and killing him, but he is also aware that if he does so, he will die. Zeref told him so himself.

But lucy is dead, so he just doesn't care anymore.

Igneel talked to him about looking at the future

But Lucy wasn't in that future anymore, so he can't look forward for it, because it died the moment Lucy did. if she wasn't in it, why bother? He knew that killing zeref was killing himself.

Gray literally saved Natsus life confronting him

This whole panel is foreshadowing to Lucy dying and Natsu wanting to die because of it

[clairegregoryau]

Through the Looking Glass

From fairytale in Season 1 to stark reality in Season 2 of Our Flag Means Death- meta ported across from this Twitter thread by popular demand!

This thread contains spoilers for the entirety of OFMD Season 2

First OFMD S1 rewatch since S2, and holy shit, if you haven't done that yet... do that. A thing that it made instantly clear: they told us *all along* where this was going, but there was a reason we didn't see it. Because we were living in Stede's world then. Now it's Ed's.

I know that a lot of us have felt that the tone shift at the end of S2 was... jarring, compared to what's come before. This felt like a show that wouldn't go there. One where being run through was a temporary hiccup. We've travelled all the way from this to this.

But we haven't jumped there without a journey in between. And from the minute we started hearing about Blackbeard, the show never tried to hide what Ed's world and his specific life was like. Not once. In fact they told us over and over and over.

But Season 1 told us a lot of those things through song and story and fuckery. It blended reality with fiction.

Stede met the Blackbeard he knew through books and tall tales, and the real man was even more wonderful than he'd imagined.

We, along with Stede, were comfortable thinking that all those other tales were exaggerations and misrepresentations, and a lot of them very likely were.

The Ed Stede got to know was a person who was capable of whimsy and silliness and loved soft things and doing something weird. Yep, he was also capable of violence and rage, but when he was with Stede, he didn't feel it so much.

This was a vacation from that life.

To Stede he was absolutely lovely... oh, and also a bloodthirsty killer. And Stede loved (and loves) everything about him, and both of those things can be true. This is a perfect example of a spot where (in watching Season 1 without the benefit of hindsight) I assumed that everyone else in that pub was wrong, and Stede was simply trying to protect Ed's fearsome reputation by agreeing on the bloodthirsty bits. And I think from Stede's perspective that was largely true. I think that's how they wanted us to see Ed, through his eyes. Now, after watching both seasons, I think it wasn't the whole picture.

They told us, we heard it, we saw glimpses of it. But we (and Ed) were in Stede's run-away-to-sea fairytale the whole time. It wasn't until Stede left that we saw the reality- the Ed we knew had been, to a degree, a fictional character all along. I always saw this scene as Ed putting a bit of distance between himself and reality; it always felt like the Blackbeard of Stede's storybooks was the fictional one. But now it feels like the softer Ed that Stede knew was much the same- neither of them the whole story of who Ed was and is.

The one person who refused to live in Stede's fairytale was Izzy. I've seen people say it before, but he always gave off that vibe of the only human in the Muppets movie, or the guy who was in Black Sails while everyone else was in Pirates of the Caribbean. He saw the real risks clearly.

And in that light, the end of S1 has shifted an inch to the left for me, and I'm seeing it at a slightly different angle.

Izzy ripped away the healing Ed was doing, but in some respects he did it by tearing away the fairytale we'd all been living in, shoving Ed back into the Blackbeard story.

And that's where we pick up again in Season 2.

The fairytale reference came back in S2 in two notable places, those being Jim carrying that legacy forward in the darkest times, and in Izzy invoking the wooden boy against Ricky's efforts. Stede's made himself into a real boy. Ricky, nope.

Now that I've watched both seasons together, the tone shift doesn't feel so jarring at all, actually.

It feels like sliding through the looking glass, out of Stede's world, and into Ed's- a world that existed all along; we were just seeing it, la vie en rose, through Stede's eyes.

At the beginning of S2, Stede's gone, and we're seeing it unfiltered through Ed's reality.

But Stede wasn't lying when he said he loved everything about Ed. He made a promise to come back and find him- he went down into Ed's darkest place and reminded him that no matter how bad things got, there WAS someone waiting for him, ready to love him.

The contrast between S1's fantasy and S2's reality (excluding mermaids and actual bird guys and cursed coats) is stark, but it really is that.

We have the same settings, the same people, and very different ideas and outcomes at different times.

But it was always there.

Things do come back to a state of (precarious) balance once they're all together. Apologies are made, whether they're spoken out loud or through actions. Things go right, things go wrong. Healing happens. Izzy continues to have the steadiest, most real through-line in the story as he tracks toward redemption, finds acceptance, and to an extent finds himself.

Once again, I hate that they went here with the ending and I wish they hadn't. But it got a fraction easier for me looking at it not as a continuation of Stede's fairytale, but of the grounded-in-pirate-reality arc Izzy was always on, even while we lived in Stede's world.

Where does that leave us? We're not going back to the fairytale, but we're not going to be living in Black Sails for S3, either. We've hit a fusion point where S1 ended with each of them going to separate, miserable homes, but S2 ended with them in the same place, ready and willing to make a go of it.

Season 3 is going to give us their world, together.

I LOVED the moments in this season where the deep emotions were in balance with the silliness I've always adored about this show. Eps4-6 were wonderful like that. Clearly we're not done with drama, either, but like Ed and Stede, I think we'll find a middle ground.

Anyway in conclusion, a rewatch of S1 after S2 somehow made me love the first season even more, which felt impossible? It's now gained /even more/ layers of depth than it had before. No matter how you feel about S2 I think it's worth that rewatch.

Adding one more bit of clarity for myself: I think we got a bit (intentionally) seduced in S1 by the idea that the Ed of the storybooks, the Vampire Viking Clown with the nine guns, was a version of him that others saw, when Stede saw the REAL person who 'worked' for Blackbeard.

In hindsight I think it's clear the Ed Stede go to know was also not the complete version of himself- the reality is, there's a whole spectrum between the two, and they've landed in the middle of it now. Ed intentionally leaned into the unlovable Kraken image to protect himself.

It very much didn't work, just like being just... Edward hadn't worked to protect himself, either. This season has been very much about pulling those two extremes together and finding all the parts that make up Ed overall (another thread on that here on Twitter, which I'll also shift across to Tumblr soon!)

And I think one of my favourite things in S2 has been seeing the way Stede SEES that- he knows what Ed's done, everyone's told him, but he still loves Ed. sees his trauma and how it affects him, and believes he's a good man regardless. He IS lovable; he's not forever broken.

And together, they can heal.

[midnightechoes]

Five years ago today, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power premiered on Netflix. I had seen a few preview articles about it, and liked what I saw. Those articles mostly focused on She-Ra’s, Adora’s, Glimmer’s, Bow’s, and Catra’s redesigns, and I thought they were fabulous. I loved Adora’s new red jacket and bouffant hair style. Glimmer’s entire redesign was inspired, and I loved that they made Bow black so we could have more diversity in the main cast.

It was She-Ra’s and Catra’s redesigns that caught my eyes the most, though. They made Catra an actual catgirl, and not just in the anime sense where she's just a cute girl with cat ears and maybe a cat tail. She was a full-on furry. It was a brilliant design choice. Honestly it’s no wonder that so many were instantly drawn to her.

And of course, She-Ra herself. I loved her new look, and her huge ass new Sword of Protection. In fact, I loved it so much that I drew this picture of her before the show even came out:

Then the show came out, and needless to say, I fell in love. And honestly, it changed my life.

I know, I know. That sounds very hyperbolic, and to an extent it is, but in a lot of ways, I’m absolutely serious.

Alright, I have to back up a little. Back when I was in college, and for a few years after, a couple of friends and I tried to make a webcomic called The Devil’s Gate. It was minorly successful but eventually floundered. Then I met some people and we tried to make a video game, which also failed. After those few years, I found myself on my own and trying to rework the concept of my webcomic. Making comics, creating stories, those have always been my dream, and I was desperately trying to figure out a story I could make work, something that I believed in. But it never truly got off the ground. By the end of 2015 I had given up on the comic, realizing that after working on it for years in different forms that I needed to step away from it.

I didn’t really know what to do after that. I was still doing my quick daily doodles, but I wasn’t writing, I wasn’t drawing anything of note. I felt emotionally and physically drained of my creativity. I was honestly getting to the point where I thought it might be time for me to give up on trying to be creative or making things all together.

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power came out on November 13, 2018, but despite looking forward to it, I didn’t actually watch it when it came out. It wasn’t until that weekend that I decided to check it out.

I was instantly hooked. I binged through the entire season in two days, and did plenty of crying and cheering. And then rewatched it immediately. I was in love. I was obsessed. It had been a long time since anything grabbed me like SPOP did. I loved the characters. I loved the colorful, sci-fi-fairy tale world of Etheria. I loved how unapologetically feminine it was. And most of all, I loved how queer it was.

I hadn’t done a ton of shipping before SPOP. I’ve been down bad for harlivy for what feels like my whole life, and I was angry when Mika and HG didn’t get together in Warehouse 13, but more often than not I had just been conditioned not to look for queer things in mainstream culture, and even barely in subculture.

That is to say, when I was smashed in the face with Catradora I was surprised how much I glommed onto it immediately. I was absolutely taken with Adora and Catra and their relationship. Both characters were so relatable, and despite not quite being text (although the subtext was so loud and obvious it might as well have been text), it was impossible to not read their feelings for each other as romantic.

It wasn’t just Catradora, even if that was a lot of it. Spinnerella and Netossa being canon from the start was wonderful. How much Glimmer and Bow screamed “BISEXUAL DISASTERS” from the start was adorable. Scorpia’s crush on Catra was as cute as it was sad in its one-sidedness.

I had never really been in a fandom. That is, yeah I’ve liked things, loved things even, but I never found other people to talk about it at length, never found discords just for that thing, never read or wrote fanfic, barely ever drew fanart. 

But, I watched SPOP, and then I watched it again. And then I drew Catra. And then I drew Adora. And then I drew them again. And suddenly I was on AO3, a site I never frequented, reading Catradora fics. And then I had an AO3 account. That December I participated in Catradora Week 2018 (I’d never heard of this kind of thing) and drew two pictures for it and wrote my first fanfic.

By the end of February I had drawn more in the three months since the show had premiered than I had in the previous year. I was working furiously on a long, multi-chapter fanfic, and writing more words than I had in the previous couple of years combined.

I was inspired again.

In the 18 months that SPOP ran for, I drew more than I had in years, I wrote hundreds of thousands of words. I felt so rejuvenated and happy about my creativity and free for the first time in years.

It’s hard to put into words exactly how it felt. I was so close to giving up my art and writing, which honestly, would have been giving up a part of myself. An important part of myself. It’s not overstating that SPOP saved me, or at least my creative spirit.

I also learned about the wonders of being in a fandom and fandom things like fan weeks, big bangs, zines. And I made some wonderful friends that I cherish to this day.

Even as I inevitably moved onto other hyperfixations, my love for She-Ra hasn’t diminished. Plushie Catra and Adora sit next to me on my desk every day. Catradora art still hangs on my wall.

The inspiration that SPOP ignited in me hasn’t died either. It’s carried me through a tremendous level of creativity that I’ve been riding since the premiere. It let me create a ton of fan art for SPOP, and then RWBY and then the Witch From Mercury, and I’ve written a ton of fanfics for RWBY and Supergirl. And perhaps the best, that inspiration has helped me create more OC stuff in the last couple years than I had in a long time.

I owe She-Ra and The Princesses of Power so much. I am so happy that it exists and that it happened when it did. I’ll always cherish it.

And for real, Netflix, SPOP spin-off movies WHEN?!

[noblogname765]

Like many of you, i rewatched S1 today. It’s my 4th rewatch of the show. First time when I was going to watch it, I was thinking of it like another show with David in it which I will casually enjoy and move on, I heard not much about it and never read the book. I thought I would lazily watch it through the weekend. I binged it whole at one day, and rewatched it whole right the next day. I had so many feelings about it, I just couldn’t find where to channel them and so I ended up on tumblr. To my greatest pleasure, the fandom here is fantastic, including Neil ))

At this rewatch, I decided on my fave scene - the one in the bandstand. It feels to me like the peak of the show, it’s so full of hurt, frustration, pain, dead-end. David and Michael played it through so true. Crowley panically looks for wayout, admits first time that they can go off together, he fears of what comes next. And all that disappointment when angel rejects him and say all the hard things which he thinks he must say or feel.

S1 ended just at the beginning of “their side”. I so very look forward to see more of it. I guess it’s even not the physical stuff I expect, but things that feel more deep, like respect, care, listening, support… all these things sometimes hard to find even in real life.

[templetogavage]

Weekly Weighing (07/21/2024 to 07/27/2024)

Below are more than seven posts I enjoyed from gaining and encouraging Tumblr this week.

1. https://www.tumblr.com/whopper-t/756730410387505152

As always, we have to include a classic before and after. I love seeing a guy give up muscle gains for a gut, and @fitgainer certainly has.

2. https://www.tumblr.com/fatlardassboy/757147827261652992

@gordoguapoofficial will keeping making this roundup with posts like this. I've rewatched this one quite a few times this week.

3. https://www.tumblr.com/jack90265/756924780327927808

I can only fit one video into a text post, so I chose to grab a screenshot of this one- most of the appeal of watching @thiccgay in motion is represented by this still, in my opinion. Soft belly, played with, while chugging. This is the bread and butter of gainer content.

4. https://www.tumblr.com/zangtang/757057344001720320

Just look at the way @athlethick fills out this shirt. That is all.

5. https://www.tumblr.com/whopper-t/757106928113614848

Another before and after! @whopper-t shows off how much he's changed over 10 years, and he should be proud of what he's done. That boy turned into a man.

6. https://www.tumblr.com/gimmefictiontx/757094729711222784/would-love-to-see-you-and-another-gluttonous-hog

Sometimes the right clothing can accentuate every curve. @gimmefictiontx should wear exclusively this from now on, in my humble opinion.

7. https://www.tumblr.com/beefyrog/757106611555876864

@beefyrog takes a perfectly perfunctory belly pic and, through a combination of glasses, beard, hair, and the prop of a video game controller, manages to produce something I find incredibly hot. Well done, and definitely worth inclusion.

Bonus: @allfattenedup

This week, @allfattenedup had contending posts nearly every day of this week. He also launched an OnlyFans, as he's moving his content there going forward. I've been a fan for some time, but given both of those facts, I thought I'd give him his own, dedicated section here this week.

1. https://www.tumblr.com/allfattenedup/756653550606614528/do-guys-outside-de-gaining-community-still

A fun little anecdote about how much changes at the club when you get as fat as he has. I recommend reading it.

2. https://www.tumblr.com/allfattenedup/756744189769908224/hey-fatso-how-does-a-guy-who-used-to-be-vain-and

Anon was really having fun with this one! You see the rest of it and the response at the link.

3. https://www.tumblr.com/allfattenedup/756834717451632640

Apparently, in addition to the artistic video content, he's working on stories! Submit some prompts if you're interested.

4. https://www.tumblr.com/allfattenedup/756937472240451584

Here's his post from last week promoting his new OnlyFans. Check it out if you're interested in sampling some artfully-made gaining videos.

5. https://www.tumblr.com/allfattenedup/757015909493768192/you-undoubtedly-and-officially-have-a-fat-face

An anon ask about how it feels to have a double chin, and an honest answer- good fun.

6. https://www.tumblr.com/allfattenedup/757106563945316352/you-know-i-had-stumbled-across-a-gainer-years

I recommend clicking through to read this whole thing. Anon talks about being inspired to gain by @allfattenedup.

7. https://www.tumblr.com/allfattenedup/757208128014172160

Finally, let's close with a nice, lengthy bit of writing that describes how every moment walking around in a fat body can be enthralling for a gainer.

And that, finally, is this week's Weekly Weighing!

[messiisgodibeliveinhim]

I finally watched Arcane Season 2.

And I

WAS

ABSOLUTELY

BLOWN AWAY!

First of all, can we talk about how goddamn PRETTY the show is?

*not my gifs, credit to the owners*

You can pause anytime throughout the show and you'll get a beautiful wallpaper for your desktop. And I'm NOT kidding!

The way they used different animation styles, soundtracks, the colours etc is just fantastic. The music with the wonderfully animated fight sequences were just breathtaking. Kudos to every artist who worked on this show, they absolutely deserve their flowers.

As for the story, yeah, it seemed a little rushed. But I didn't mind it that much. It doesn't give you much time to process crazy shit that happens in the show. For example, when Heimerdinger and Isha sacrifice themselves, there isn't a single mention of them afterwards. Not even a passing remark. And mind you, these were not small side characters, they were important. But alas, they weren't treated as such after their deaths and I just can't wrap my head around that.

(My babygirl deserved better😭)

Some character arcs and choices were slightly confusing to me, but I don't dislike them. Like, why did Caitlyn suddenly change her mind about VI and decide to help her, why did Viktor go from wanting to help the undercity to taking away everyone's choice by making them into mindless robots and why did Jayce straight up murder him instead of talking to him first, knowing that the man who saved him when he was little was actually Viktor from the future? (I was mad at Jayce for a bit, NGL)

Buuuuutttt, I loved a lot of things in this show. The sisterly love between Isha and Jinx, Jinx sacrificing herself to save Vi, Viktor revealing himself to be the mage who gave Jayce the rune stone and confessing that only Jayce can show him the right way in every universe and every timeline🥺, Jayce's "You're Perfect even with all your Imperfections" speech to God-Viktor and him choosing to save the world by staying with his 'partner' till the end, the entire episode of Ekko falling in love with Jinx/Powder in another universe, AMBESSA MEDERDA (if you've watched the show, you'll get it. She's such a bad ass!) and of course, Jinx's entrance in the final battle.

(I was girinning like an idiot throughout this whole sequence, cuz yeah, Jinx is so cool!)

Overall, I really enjoyed watching this show and I can't wait to rewatch it in a couple of months. Even with its pacing and some plot holes, I personally loved Season 2 more than Season 1. This season was much more dynamic, much more beautiful and it really endeared me to characters that I didn't care for previously. I heard we're getting some spin offs, so I'm also looking forward to that.

Also, Viktor is my newest poor-meow-meow😁

Oh and please show some love to the artists who made these amazing songs for the show. Arcane S2 wouldn't have been as good as it was without them.

[coimbrabertone]

Offtopic Offseason #3 - Clone Wars Rewatch Thoughts: Part I.

We're deep in the motorsports offseason and I've been on a Clone Wars rewatch for the past week or so. I'm in early season three right now, still before the timeskip, but I've been enjoying it a lot and it's gotten me thinking about Star Wars again, so I wanted to yap about it in a blogpost.

I think I'll even do a part two once I'm done rewatching the whole thing.

For now though, I'm going to talk about what I've watched so far, so seasons one and two, and the first couple of episodes of season three.

So...Clone Wars starts out pretty rough, I'm not gonna lie. The first few episodes are just a bit cringeworthy with annoying battle droid dialogue, the voice actors still finding their footing, and the animation is pretty spotty - I'll talk more about that in a moment - and of course the classic complaints of "Snips" and "Skyguy" and all that.

All of these problems started in the movie - which I most recently watched in 2023 but skipped this time because, well, it sucks unfortunately - but they are still apparent in the early episodes of season one.

The early episodes still have their moments.

The Malevolence arc is pretty competent, Rookies is probably the first legitimately good episode of the show, Cloak of Darkness and especially Lair of Grievous are good, and then from Trespass onwards the show really comes into its own.

That being said, I think season two is better than season one. Season three is another step forward, and from the timeskip onwards I think the show really hits its stride, especially because the updated designs look a lot better and fit with the animation bump.

That being said, already in season two I noticed the animation is getting better.

Season one has that classic CGI cartoon problem where the environments are rather drab, and they can't have too many characters on screen at once since it's expensive to do - and Clone Wars was an infamously expensive show - which led to a lot of battles consisting of...two Jedi and like three clone troopers against five battle droids with two super battle droids in the background. It's an understandable error, and they get much better about it as the show goes on, but it's pretty noticeable in season one.

That's a problem for a lot of CGI cartoons though. Watch Beware the Batman, Transformers Prime, or Jimmy Neutron and you'll notice a lot of these same traits.

Even some of the Barbie cartoons have those problems and it's really noticeable because it's like these blondes in bright pink colors against like a flat brown background. It's pretty trippy.

Alright, enough about the flaws of early 2010s CGI animation.

Here's a two-parter I didn't really pay all that much attention to the first two times I watched it - the first time back when it aired on Cartoon Network, the second time when I rewatched the whole series on Disney+ ahead of season seven - the Zillo Beast episodes.

Before I always just saw them as a pretty basic Godzilla homage - they awaken this giant monster on the Malastare battlefield, they eventually subdue it, but Palpatine wants to study it on Coruscant, it inevitably breaks out, and they have to stop it - but this time, it hit for me for whatever reason.

First there's the electro-proton bomb, and the nuke parallels there - they're obvious enough that I must've picked up on them before but I guess I didn't come to appreciate it - but then even when they wake the Zillo Beast, it never actually tries to leave the hole.

In fact, it doesn't until the Dugs force it out with the toxic gas.

Then the beast is clearly suffering when the shock tanks bring it down.

So, this giant, hurt animal gets sent to Coruscant in the laboratory, and Palpatine wants it killed so he can study its indestructible scales more quickly.

Only then does the Zillo Beast break out and go on its rampage, and even then, the rampage is focused directly on Palpatine.

Then they kill it with the gas bombs, and you can see it suffer as it dies, and the Jedi are so clearly disturbed by all this.

Palpatine, however, immediately tasks the scientist with cloning another one - and apparently that story is followed up on in Bad Batch season two which has unironically given me more motivation to actually watch the rest of Bad Batch than anything else I've heard about that show.

Anyway, the reason why I think this episode clicked with me this time is because this plan has Sidious written all over it, but he's forced to maneuver it as Palpatine.

He keeps trying to justify the Zillo Beast experiments but eventually his patience wears thin, and he just starts threatening the scientist to do his bidding, despite the fact he's supposed to be the kindly old Chancellor here.

Moreover, when the Zillo Beast is after him, it's probably the only time in the whole show that Sidious is in real danger, but he's with Anakin, Padme, and the droid so he can't do anything about it.

The whole show Palpatine is pulling the strings, controlling both the Republic and the Separatists, ensuring no side gets the upper hand.

Except for here, because the Zillo Beast wants to kill him, and he can't do anything about it.

He needs the Jedi and the Clones to kill the Zillo Beast for him, and once its dead, all he can do is task his scientists to clone a new one so he can try again.

It's such a cool thing to do with Palpatine/Sidious and there's a karmic justice to it all because it's entirely his fault too.

So yeah, I used to just dismiss these episodes as "oh I guess Filoni wanted to do a monster episode" but no, there's some substance here and it's pretty great.

It also goes to show that, even before the timeskip, Clone Wars was a really, really great Star Wars show. After the timeskip, it becomes the best as far as I'm concerned.

I'm excited for more Mandalore episodes, I'm excited for the Savage Opress arc - even if his name is even more on the nose than playing the Imperial March whenever Anakin does something evil - I'm excited for the Citadel, and Umbara, and the undercover Obi-Wan episodes.

I'm excited for Maul, for the Sabotage arc, for the Order 66 arc in season six, and I can't wait to finish strong on the Siege of Mandalore which is probably some of the best Star Wars content, period.

That's not even all of it. There's so much good stuff.

I love Clone Wars, it makes me happy.

[irlnorthshaw]

Here's a question:

What are your Supa Strikas ships that you thought of and like, and think people wouldn't get?? (I'm curious lol-)

MIMPI... mimpi... be careful for what you're asking because you know how i am with shipping. guys i ship for life. like i dont give a damn if the ship's interaction is worth one cent... i make do with what i can and have!!! and after rewatching the show a couple billion times... i have gathered some INTERESTING ones.

liquido and riano

as you may know, i have watched "your latest trick" A LOT. yes they did interact in this one scene and never again but hear me out– they give me: liquido can't get over himself and thinks he can bag one of the finest man in the super league. but we all know riano, riano isn't having any of that. their convo would go something like this:

"hey, riano~" "goodbye, liquido."

el matador and blok

YES. yall heard me. this is also me showing some love to blok because some people seem to forget about him!!! what can i say, i love the idea of this dynamic. the thing is, sometimes i ship things in a way i wanna see more of them interacting and not necessarily picture them BEING together. if that makes sense.

these two are exactly that. i wanna see more of them interact bc lowkey i thought it was so wholesome when blok wanted to collaborate and promote fzzzl bmmm w the release of el matador's action figure.

DOOMATIC!!!!! OH YEAH BABY

if only automatic had more moments EUGH... this would've been so good. i personally pat myself on the back when i thought of this one bc i cooked HARD!!! they definitely cannot stand each other and to me, that's the best part of it all.

enemies to lovers who? more like enemies and i cannot believe we're also lovers.

skarra and north

the best way i can describe this one is. i am simply projecting myself on north and i love skarra. so... yeah #SHAMELESS

inyo and miss altivo

AKA PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE YURI!!! this one you guys HAVE to love. PLEASE!!! the potential is so insane here... inyo's big brains and chameleon-like tactics? combined with altivo's unwavering power over these dumb men for clicks and views??? COUNT ME TF IN!!!

we need more yuri in this fandom and THIS is where we should start.

brenda and lena

SPEAKING OF YURI... here's another one. except this time i am so surprised nobody has jumped on this yet??? futbol 360 yuri, i NEEEED IT!!! i need it now. they'd honestly be so cute and wholesome, moreover they definitely trade information abt the players for work

coach and the sheikh

now this one is a tad bit controversial BUT who am i without some controversial opinions!!! this is another case of i cannot see them BEING together, but i would kill to see them interact more. they are wayyy more entertaining than coach and vince. (THAT MIGHT ALSO BE CONTROVERSIAL) ohh... the way sheikh is so sassy w coach. maybe i just want more of the sultans... yeah thats it.

"losing your cool, coach? or just losing?" AND THEN PROCEED TO WALK AWAY LIKE THE BADDIE HE IS??? crazy stuff. i want more. NOW!!

belmont and von pushup

OKAY SO... storytime is i had an edit of these two a long time ago but i cant find it???? so consider it xander lost media at the moment. you guys need to hear me out on this because they would be SOOO PEAK!!! jock and goth but to another level i fear. as big and tough the iron tank guys are, i doubt they can stand grimm fc's haunted gimmicks.

plus von pushup works together w belmont to scare his own team bc he thinks its hilarious and perfect psychological training for them

AAAAAND THAT'S ALL... for now hehehe

sorry for the really long response but I HAD TO GET IT OUT OF MY SYSTEM!!!! i love crackships so much and especially in supa strikas bc we get a whole lot of freedom as a smaller fandom to do whatever. this was a very fun post to make, thank you so much mimpi for that lovely question!!! i always look forward to your input

[krumii-67]

SEVERANCE S2E4 SPOILERS

-

-

-

-

ok so dumping all my messy thoughts here. first, i LOVED irving in this ep so fucking much like him calling out allll the bs with helena. i’ve always loved him but he fucking ate in this ep. mark, on the other hand, who i thought was my fav that could do no wrong, was pissing me off. irving saw right through him, that mark was so blinded by love he couldn’t see what was right in front of him. like bitch, THATS NOT UR HELLY. WAKE UP.

it was always rlly obvious it was never helly r in the first place after she stepped out of the elevator. but the repercussions of IRVING B GETTING FIRED (aka KILLED) is TORTURING ME. i better see him again or dan erickson and the other writers will be paying for my therapy bills.

also mark is gonna realize he just slept w HELENA EAGAN !! helena rlly wanted mark wowwwwww. the last thing helly r remembered was speaking to the lumon crowd (“we’re prisoners!!”) and now shes drowning in freezing water. welcome back helly we missed u <33

i already mentioned in another post the mark/helena sex scene to irving cuts paralleling with jayce/mel sex scene to viktor dying w the hexcore cuts. that drove me insane. like mark (jayce) betraying irving (viktor) with someone who’s kinda using him - helena (mel), not in like a romantic way for mark/irving but just betrayal generally. also irving (viktor) nearing his ‘death’ and mark (jayce) being fully confronted w it later like he shoulda listened more all along. oughhhhh im losing it.

i want mark and dylan to FORMALLY apologize to irving b’s spirit. ohhhh they are going to regret ever doubting him. and helena better be watching her back after that emotional attack on irving.

it rlly sucks that irving is gone (at least for now) so the explanation for his dream/hallucination may not be unveiled for awhile. like the numbers forming eyes (??) could lean into the theory that the work they’re doing is to program people’s emotions/brains. we already saw with the cold harbor file an image of gemma on mark’s computer in s2e1. seeing burt in another cubicle may imply the theory true that burt and irving once worked together, but said memories were wiped. i’m rlly confused ab the undead lady “half the height of the average woman.” why was she so important that she shows up in irvs dream? (edit: that was woe, forgot) i’ll wait for the smarter fans to theorize ab that.

i was rlly hoping to see more of mark experiencing the effects of reintegration. we just left off on him getting the procedure and his memories meshing together. i get they’re leaving us wanting more but that was the main thing i looked forward to in this episode, and all we really got was a split moment gemma hallucination.

bc mark has been reintegrated, he could find irving outside lumon. and discovering helly is an eagan on the outside, we could see him look into it, and im excited to see devon’s reaction to all of it (if we do get to see that at all).

the whole scene w milchick reading the story to them was really strange and just generally the whole story about kier throughout the episode perplexed me. kier killed his brother?? jerking off in the woods?? idfk… i definitely need to rewatch the episode to focus more on that aspect since i was preoccupied with the interpersonal relationships.

unintellectual rant but needed to get it out. i can’t wait to listen to the next episode of the severance podcast and hearing smarter ppls thoughts on woe’s hollow