#and i want to make it really clear that as meta writers we don't THINK about HALF these shitty things

[buddieism]

tommy's character, bucktommy's inherent flaws, tommy & eddie as mirrors and buddie endgame; a (lengthy) meta analysis

honestly, what's really confirmed my feelings about tommy (and the imminent bucktommy bones -> buddie pipeline) is that there have now been multiple opportunities for the writers to actually make tommy a likeable/serious love interest for buck and they just…haven’t. because while fans are naturally going to overanalyse every little thing, the vast majority of the show's audience are regular viewers who consume the show at face value and don't think twice about it -- so if tommy was intended to be buck's endgame or anything remotely close to it, they'd absolutely want to make the most of his (very limited) screen time to present him in the best light they could. think about karen, the only non-main LI, and how she was introduced to us -- despite hen's cheating, we can see how dedicated karen and hen are to each other and how karen is a complex character in her own right who is immediately easy to root for and love.

comparatively, when we look at tommy's s7 appearances and specifically his interactions with buck, it becomes abundantly clear that there isn't really much depth to their relationship at all. which is fine! it's just... you know. fine. let's get into it.

following the cruise arc, we watch tommy through buck's eyes in 7x04 where he's basically wining and dining eddie -- flying him to vegas, getting them front row tickets to a fight, sparring with him in muay thai, playing pick up basketball with him -- tommy and eddie are so similar (which we'll come back to later), and we even get that line from eddie about how well they "click." as the audience, we are being subconsciously told to align tommy and eddie together -- and furthermore, we are told that tommy can easily make grand gestures when he wants to. now let's compare that to the bucktommy moments of the season.

bucktommy's first date: tommy makes a shady comment that would have outed buck if eddie or marisol caught onto it and then proceeds to abandon him on the sidewalk because he thinks buck isn't "ready" for a relationship with a man

i'll be objective here -- i understand in a show like 911 there's always going to be "unnecessary" relationship conflict for the sake of drama and i can also see how buck trying to play off their date as platonic to eddie might have put a bad taste in tommy's mouth. but we hear from tommy himself that he struggled with being open about his sexuality when he was at the 118 so he could have absolutely extended some sympathy towards buck for not wanting to come out on the spot to his best friend -- especially when tommy fully knows how important of a role eddie plays in buck's life. at the very least, he didn't have to leave buck alone on the curb. this isn't me trying to woobify buck because yeah, he's a grown man, he's fine -- but that doesn't mean it still isn't a bit of an asshole move.

the bachelor party: tommy doesn't dress up for the theme and dismisses buck when he's clearly disappointed about him doing so

tommy showing zero interest for the bachelor party buck planned is practically the writers waving a massive red flag in front of the camera -- him having to leave because he's on call is an understandable 'conflict' plot point but why not have him show up in an 80s themed outfit? it wouldn't have changed anything except that he and buck would have had a positive interaction; buck would have been happy that tommy cared enough to make that small gesture and it could have been a cute way to establish their relationship as one built on mutual effort. (btw, the bucktommy hospital kiss could be seen as a big gesture, sure -- but from a more practical viewpoint knowing how rushed this season had to be, it was also just an easy way for buck to "come out" to the rest of the 118 without having to spend too much episode airtime on it.)

the medal ceremony: tommy says 'enjoy it while it lasts' (which, LOL) and also is not shown reacting to buck receiving his medal. he also has a conversation with henren in a deleted scene.

again, i'm going to try to give tommy the benefit of the doubt -- i'm not saying he has to be sunshine and rainbows all the time and i have no issue with a character having a snarky/sarcastic side. but when his screentime is so minimal, every line of dialogue matters. and it's pretty damning that the writers aren't taking those few chances to give us something to appreciate about him. with buck, tommy makes a dismissive comment for literally zero reason, and with hen and karen, who are rightfully looking out for their friend, tommy refuses to take them seriously at all.

bucktommy's dinner in the finale: buck displays some vulnerability about losing bobby, and tommy... really doesn't seem to care.

honestly i refuse to rewatch this part of the ep because it really icks me out on another level but iirc: buck says he's glad bobby's okay because bobby is like the father he never had -> tommy says "your father's alive" -> something something joke about daddy issues. ignoring #that joke entirely, it's really insane to me that they have tommy even acknowledge the nuclear bomb that is buck's relationship with his parents. yes, we had a bit of a ham-fisted 'redemption arc' in s6 but that doesn't negate the buckley parents being absolutely heinous and the fact that buck verbalises how bobby played the role of the father figure because philip didn't -- all for tommy to basically deny that to his face -- is absurd. tommy has expressed on multiple occasions that he's jealous of the 118 family bond, so this line is just... very interesting to me.

now, let's recap all these events and bring eddie back into the mix!

post-bucktommy's first date, buck is more torn up about the fact that he lied to eddie than the actual date to the point that he has to vent to maddie about it. he then comes out to eddie, who is incredibly supportive (and oliver and ryan make some very curious acting choices indeed). eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.

pre-bachelor party, eddie is the one to suggest he and buck dress in matching (queer-coded) costumes. he then stays by buck's side at the party when everyone else leaves and although we'll never get to see it (tim minear i'm inside your walls👹), they sing an absurdly romantic karaoke song together. eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.

during the medal ceremony, when the camera pans to each member of the 118's love interest/family, it is eddie we are shown smiling at buck, not tommy. this is especially interesting considering we get buck reacting to tommy. i honestly can't get over how a reciprocated tommy reaction would have been an easy yet significant moment to cement bucktommy as a relationship, but they gave us eddie's instead (with chris in the background and marisol conveniently obscured, mind you). eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.

in the final episode, when eddie is experiencing his personal worst nightmare, buck is the one at eddie's side every step of the way. buck talks to christopher, buck reassures eddie (without judgement), and it's made clear that buck will be there for eddie, whatever he needs.

at every possible opportunity, we the audience are being implicitly told that eddie is buck's person. he is his place of support (buck having his more vulnerable coming out scene with eddie rather than his sister); he has buck's back (the bachelor party); he is his family (medal ceremony reaction), and ultimately, this goes both ways (finale).

some other things worth noting: when buck has his coming out scene with maddie, she tells him he's confused about his feelings in a way that seems to indicate she's talking about his feelings towards eddie ("if you there's something you need to tell eddie, you will"). in bobby's conversation with buck in the firehouse, he's verbally supportive of tommy and even asks if buck is going to see him, but buck goes to eddie's house instead. these were deliberate choices made by the writers; eddie has been consistently intertwined in bucktommy's relationship both overtly and subtextually throughout the entirety of s7. and let's not even get into the whole 'evan' thing, because that could be a whole other post in itself.

from the first moment we start to learn about tommy's character (beyond his... coloured past), we find out that he and eddie are practically mirrors. why not make tommy and buck share similar interests? why not give them something to bond over? why present tommy and eddie as almost identical in every way? because tommy is a placeholder for eddie. buck's initial bisexuality journey can't happen with eddie when eddie still hasn't come to terms with his own feelings. so, in the meantime, tommy is the "safe" choice in buck's mind because buck has nothing to lose with tommy whereas he's got everything to lose with eddie. buck can't confront what he truly wants yet because the risk factor is far greater and it's been repeatedly asserted that buck has an issue with people in his life leaving -- he would never do anything to jeopardise his relationship with eddie.

but ultimately (and in my opinion, fairly soon), we are going to get that moment where it "clicks" for buck and he realises that it is eddie he has feelings for. and when that happens, there's basically only one way it can go. we know buck can't keep secrets from eddie; we know eddie is going into s8 feeling "isolated"; we know tim loves making his characters suffer before they can be happy. in my mind, the narrative is going to go something like this: buck feelings realisation -> pining buck era -> eddie healing journey and a reevaluation of what buck means to him -> some insane life-threatening situation that really doubles down on how buck and eddie care more about each other than anyone else because it is 9-1-1 at the end of the day -> love confession induced by their dramatic near-death experience -> #BUDDIE_CANON !

when we factor in how there was a possibility of eddie having the sexuality arc this season instead, how tim has said buddie is one of his favourite dynamics of the show, and how supportive both oliver and ryan are of the ship, i really can't see how everything isn't building to buddie endgame. every other main pairing of the show has had seasons of development, of conflict, of bonding moments. buck and eddie have gone through that with each other time and time over (tsunami/lawsuit/shooting arc etc), which is why every other random love interest that's introduced for either of them falls flat in comparison. they quite literally are exactly what the other person needs; buck wants the stability of a home, a family, and unconditional love; eddie wants someone he can trust, a caretaker for his son but also a partner. buddie is the ship the audience wants to root for, because we know they work! now that we have canonically bisexual buck and eddie finally having to face his complicated feelings about losing shannon, buddie isn't just the logical conclusion -- it's the inevitable one.

[picaroroboto]

For the past couple days, I've been unfortunately cursed with thinking about Zenos yae Galvus. I don't even particularly like him - not that I dislike him either, Zenosfuckers you can put your scythes down - but it seems to me like a lot of the fandom either greatly misunderstands him, or doesn't even care to try to understand him, which from an objective standpoint as someone who cares deeply about writing in video games kind of pisses me off. But I'm more pissed about the fact that I'm apparently going to keep thinking about this issue until I actually write a character analysis of him.

Q: "But, what even is there to analyze with him? Isn't he all about wanting to fight the WoL and nothing else?"

Well, you wouldn't be wrong with saying that. That motivation is at the forefront of his character, and even if you look closer, everything about him comes back to either "violence" or "lack of understanding of others". But there are more meaningful sides to his deceptively simple character. That question of meaning is what I really want to look into - what does his character mean, what symbolic or thematic role does he play in this story?

Q: "Better question: why are you posting this on your art blog/Fate meta sideblog?"

Good question, with a stupid answer: I have all of 6 followers on my FF14 sideblog, and around 150 here. Let's go under the cut so they don't have to read a wall of text, unless they want to.

When you look at and compare FF14's villains, you can see a very clear change, no doubts thanks to the change in main writers. ARR Gaius and Thordan are more or less two-bit villains - Gaius's memeable iconic Praetorium speech gives us insight into how fascists try to justify themselves but little into Gaius's actual personality, while all Thordan gets as far as depth of character is an NPC in a sidequest remarking that he wasn't always a bad person and was probably doing what he thought best for his nation. Nidhogg is a little more understandable, since revenge is a relatable motivation to anyone who's been hurt by others. In Stormblood, Zenos and Yotsuyu are both presented as deserving of pity even as they do terrible things. Come Shadowbringers and Endwalker though, the story takes a greater interest on why villains like Emet-Selch and Elidibus do the things they do, and the player is allowed more options to try to understand them and see how similar they are to the WoL. Hell, Hermes and the Endsinger are barely "villains" at all, with the level of sympathy the story shows them.

What I'm getting to here is that Zenos, with half his arc in Stormblood and the rest in Endwalker, is sort of caught in the middle of this shift. He played the role of the rival character in Stormblood really well, but come Endwalker, he's standing on a stage full of heroes and villains with grand causes and deep motivations, as the guy whose sole motivation is fighting for pleasure.

It seems he's not unaware of this contrast himself - when Jullus confronts him for ruining Garlemald for no good reason, he retorts with "Would you be happier had I a good reason?" Zenos makes no attempt to justify his own actions and doesn't care that his reason seems incomprehensible and unforgivable to others. Yet in that same cutscene Alisaie hits him with the fact that if he keeps living solely for pleasure, he'll die alone. When next we see Zenos, he's alone at the Royal Menagerie waxing philosophical about what he really sought in the battle with the WoL.

See, what really motivates Zenos isn't just the thrill of battle - this guy has gotten Battle High and the joy of human connection confused. Really.

Even before he gets so perturbed by the idea of dying alone, there's other suggestions, like his proposal of friendship to the WoL when they fought in Stormblood, and then later his dying words in which he explains that he never understood others - at his core, he's just lonely. I know there's an official side story that tells it, but you don't need to know the exact details to glean that he had some sort of tragic backstory. Sad, but not a surprise, considering he's the prince of the Garlean Empire, raised to take the throne and continue the Empire's legacy of violence.

At his core, he's a very lonely person, but also a thing of violence, raised using violent methods for the purpose of causing more violence. Violence is how he lives and breathes - the only way he gets any sort of connection with others in a world of hurting and being hurt is the brief connection warriors dueling as equals can sometimes find. Don't deny that this sort of connection exists - FF14 is great at making fights that are both fun and tell a story. Hence, why he goes crazy for the WoL, but also refers to them as "friend". In their fights, he senses (or thinks he senses) similarity between him and them. Beneath all the madness is a pure, genuine joy in seeing the self reflected in the other...but he also instantly gets on the train to projection-town, population Zenos, and assumes the WoL is exactly like him, ignoring or failing to notice that they also fight for deeper meanings. The worst part is, he doesn't even notice that what he's actually seeking in fighting them is connection until Alisaie's aforementioned callout.

So he goes and angsts for a while, then turns into a dragon again and flies across the universe to help us kick the Endsinger's tail feathers, then issues his challenge for that duel he'd been longing for. But what's changed is that he starts with a question - "Such pleasures you sought for their own sake, and for no other reason, is that not so?". Dying after the duel, he's full of questions too: "Was your life a gift or a burden? Did you find fulfillment?" Alisaie's suggestion that he'd die alone actually spurred him to realize what he actually sought in the WoL, and now he's asking all these questions in an attempt to, for the first time in his life, genuinely connect with another human being.

The questions aren't important just because they're a sign of how Zenos has changed in Endwalker - they're actually the thematic heart of Endwalker! ARR may have had "Answers" as it's theme, but EW is the expac of questions. Namely the biggest question of all: What is the meaning of life? Different characters have different answers to that, leading to the grand-scale symbolic conflict being the Endsinger's despair - her belief that there is no meaning in life - versus whatever reasons the WoL chooses to live for, left, as always, up to player interpretation.

When you look deeper, Zenos isn't actually as out-of-place in the symbolic conflict as he first seems. His depressed worldview - that metaphor about drowning in a swamp again - seems to align with the Endsinger's view about life being meaningless. But he aids the WoL in defeating her. In that way he serves as part of the answer to her question about the meaning of life. He may have resented life at times, but he still found meaning in chasing pleasure. Not the strongest or most beautiful reason to deny oblivion, perhaps, but it did enable him to help the WoL triumph. I think of Zenos's philosophy as being connected to the concept of "Amor Fati"...largely because this quote explaining it sounds like something he'd say, or at least agree with on some level:

"and if our soul has trembled with happiness and sounded like a harp string just once, all eternity was needed to produce this one event—and in this single moment of affirmation all eternity was called good, redeemed, justified, and affirmed."

So he does have a meaningful role in Endwalker, as the "Amor Fati" against the Endsinger's "Memento Mori". I think that in this the story shows that his reason for living, while somewhat shallow, is not necessarily a morally wrong thing in and of itself (setting aside for a second all the people he hurt in his pursuit of that). It's just that, since it is a lonely pursuit that denies everything except for his target, it still feels empty. The core of the counterargument against the Endsinger's despair is that both pleasure and fulfillment are necessary to live a meaningful life in a meaningless universe, and that's why Zenos is here in Endwalker. Why he even exists in the story in the first place.

Even if you're one of the people who deeply hates Zenos...well, you probably wouldn't have read this whole thing if you did, but I still think it's important to read into characters you dislike, because every character in a story is written for a reason. Plus, trying to understand even their worst enemies is one of the WoL's key traits as of ShB and EW. With his last breaths, Zenos was trying to understand the WoL too - carrying this understanding of him with you as we move into our next adventures is the least you can do for your "friend".

[luthien-under-bough]

my meandering thoughts after ep7:

i think a lot of people are overlooking the importance of daemon's scenes in episode 7 in focusing so much on oscar tully. like ok sure it is objectively funny to see daemon be read for filth by a teenager, but this is not some meta punishment doled out by the writers because they hate his character - or even oscar "gagging" daemon. this is daemon directly responding to rhaenyra's accusation during their ep2 argument: "I think you used my words as an excuse to take your own revenge… to indulge the darkness you keep sheathed within you like a blade." Oscar's own words to willem blackwood call back to this: "it is true that he made clear his base desires, but you did not have to pursue such savagery. You did it… because you wanted to."

like yes, daemon is being humbled, but he is also specifically acting contrary to his own desires, and choosing to do what is necessary in service to rhaenyra's claim. it's obvious in the look he shares with ser simon, and in his shifting expression from anger to acceptance as he realizes he must do this to earn the crucial support of the riverlords. i do not think the daemon of episode 2/3 would have responded this way. he would have given into that impulse that's telling him to smack oscar around and burn the lot of them. he is putting aside what he would do, in favor of what rhaenyra needs him to do.

And the look on his face afterwards is full of horror - for the first time we really see him haunted by his own act of violence, when we've typically seem him remorseless or flippant (rhea royce, vaemond velaryon, the unnamed body they used for laenor's "death") if it advances his aims. this contrasts with rhaenyra in this same episode, where we see her really indulging in violence for the first time - she sacrifices the dragonseeds in pursuit of finding new dragonriders, which is also a repudiation of her and daemon's earlier argument, where he accused her of being too weak to spill blood to achieve greatness.

(literally everything they do ties back to one another, their influence on one another, and which parts of each other and viserys they choose to internalize and express - two halves of a whole, indeed - so it baffles me that most daemyras are unsatisfied with this storyline just because they aren't physically together, but that's a story for another post)

daemon's scene in the Harrenhal godswood leads directly into the vision with viserys, where he is confronted with the question of whether or not he still wants the crown (really, if he ever actually wanted it - or was it just a symbol of his brother's love, of recognition, of the ultimate tool to achieve power and respect in this world). he's just had to make a choice and take an action that conflicts with his own worldview, of what strength and loyalty means, of the acceptability to the ends justifying the means, of the ramifications of the collateral damage that such choices have - which is all tied into the true weight of bearing the crown. is he really cut out for this? i think it's clear the answer will be 'no' - and it will reaffirm his support for rhaenyra, at the same time her own journey has brought her to a place where she has found a way to wield her power and authority in a way that can be respected (and feared) and is independent of her reliance on daemon's martial prowess and masculinity.

if there's still any doubt that daemon's visions all have purpose and are moving him forward, i really don't know what to tell you. it's frustrating to see his arc reduced to "daemon is doing nothing all season" because most of it has been internal. both daemon and rhaenyra have grown from the accusations levied at one another in their argument, and i think are positioned well for a reunion that allows them to "finish their conversation" from a place where they are both more able to function within the parameters of their strange and unique relationship as sovereign/consort, husband/wife. uncle/niece, and even brother/sister (as their relationship to viserys is very much reminiscent of siblings competing for their father's love and attention). it's a very clear arc to me, and i am very excited to see how it all comes together in the finale (as well as how this sets the stage for future conflict between them).

(the " but in the book…" arguments about daemon at this point are also weak IMO, because daemon basically does nothing during this section in the book. and because the show has added different dimensions to his character that simply do not exist in the source material. his time in harrenhal is summed up in a couple of paragraphs. the riverlords all honor their oaths without conflict - and he fights in the battle of Stone Hedge, which you can mourn as an adaptational choice you do not agree with, but personally i think it's far less interesting than what we were given in the show.)

this is where i wish the fandom at large would give the writers a little more credit, and extend your faith a little further. sure there are some odd choices throughout, and yes they have taken adaptational liberties you may not agree with - but as we near the end of the season, the overall vision for daemon (and rhaenyra) is clearer, and i think it will be even more rewarding looking back on the season as a whole.

[bleeding-star-heart]

The more I think about DA:2 's ending and read people's thoughts on it here, the more it changes. I've come to the conclusion that while the Watsonian explanation for what Anders does is okay, I cannot say the same of the Doylist explanation. For those who don't understand what that means, a couple definitions. Watsonian: the in-story justification for why something happens or is. Ex. Luke's aunt and uncle are murdered in A New Hope because the Empire was looking for Luke. Doylist: The author's purpose for having something happen or be in a story. Ex. Luke's aunt and uncle die to move the plot forward and help make sure he leaves Tattoine. In other words: the in-universe reason for the Chantry being blown up is clear, but the writers' reasons aren't. Therefore, we are not discussing Anders's motivation. There's plenty of meta for that if you're curious. Instead, we are discussing the writers' motivation for writing it the way they did. One could simply say, 'they needed a conflict for the finale', and have done with it. But that only explains the most bare-bone plot-related reasons. It says nothing about how that plot point relates to the overall message, or how the writers intended Anders to be viewed by the audience. Specifically, I doubt that the writers meant us to view Anders positively. If that was their intention, they would not have written Anders murdering Elthina in a way that involved massive collateral damage and the death of innocents. Those things don't tend to generate goodwill. It's possible they wanted Anders to be viewed as a villain, but in that case, why doesn't DA2 end with an Anders boss fight? No, I suspect that the writers' intention were in the same situation as Marvel movies with politically progressive villains. Namely, the ones the audience ends up agreeing with to the point they're in danger of losing their status as villains. Only, instead of it being a single character, the writers had this problem with the concept of mage rights as a whole. Namely, modern people are generally against depriving people of their freedoms/rights. They're especially against doing so because of something the person can't control or doing it to a whole group because only some members of that group are bad. Therefore, most players will probably agree with Anders that the Circles are indeed bad. Especially players from real-life marginalized groups. It's the same deal as X-Men, except that X-Men understands and ANTICIPATES that the audience is on the side of the X-Men. DA:2, on the other hand...not so much. So, I suspect Anders blowing up the Chantry was the writers doing what Marvel writers often do: make the left-wing villain inexplicably do something nasty in order to have them retain their villain status. Or, in this case, have the most prominent activist do something bad so that the mage rights cause looks equal to the Templar point of view. And, like in the case of Marvel, it doesn't really work. Anders blowing up the Chantry doesn't make the Templars look right. As a matter of fact, the in-universe explanation explicitly relies upon the fact that it doesn't! And that is why I cannot say the writers' reason to write Anders do what he does makes sense. Mainly because I don't believe the writers had a reason. In other words, I believe Anders was done dirty by the finale.

[thegirlwhowrites642]

Hi, please free to ignore( huge fan of your metas btw)

What are your thoughts on Peter pettigrew? In swm we saw him fanboying over james to being responsible for his death. Just because he was afraid or he never really loved his friends. Many people say James and Sirius treated him shitty thats why he betrayed. Some even say he was just a tag along. Please share your thoughts.

First of all, thank you!

(also, unless they are rude, I don't ignore any questions, it might just take me two years to answer)

Peter Pettigrew

My very controversial opinion on Peter is that I love him (as a character).

To me, Peter is one of those characters who represent how Rowling's clear lack of self-awareness as a person translates in her work into her being unable to recognize her strengths as a writer. The majority of the most interesting things she comes up with are not the ones she focuses on.

And that's the case for Peter Pettigrew, who might be the Marauder with the most interesting story.

It's way too easy to reduce him to a coward as the author seems to want you to believe. And even claiming he didn't love his friends is a flattening of his character.

You can have a tendency to be influenced by peer pressure all you want but you don't become an unregistered animagus to help someone if you don't love the friend you are doing that for and you don't have a bit of courage (especially considering how long the whole thing was and that he wasn't particularly talented). He risked extremely severe consequences on his body due to the possibility of the process going wrong and he risked Azkaban for being unregistered.

That's fundamentally the opposite behavior of the one he later has with the Potters.

I also think it's important to point out how Remus is not a close relative (father, son, brother) and how the help Peter provides is not essential to Remus' survival, it's emotional comfort. The lack of necessity of the animagus matter and the easily cancellable bond with Remus increase the braveness and love of Peter's act (in contrast for example with something like what Narcissa does with her son by lying to Voldemort).

I think Peter's story is the one of someone who lost his courage, not the one of a person who never had it.

Doesn't this also make it so much more delicious how his downfall is caused by the return of a glimpse of honor?

I do agree with the fact that in SWM, James and Sirius don't treat him particularly well, especially Sirius, but I don't think they are that aware of it, especially James. They are a bit crude, and they are arrogant. They are two bright posh 16yo guys in a boarding school in the 70s. I don't expect from them a particularly high level of sensitivity in how they talk to people, especially to someone they take for granted knows to be their friend. Sirius is probably more aware of it, but I believe James to be quite unaware of himself at this point in the timeline. This is before his maturation really kicks in, his whole interaction with Lily shows a lack of self-awareness in how he talks to people (we know Lily turns him into a bit of an idiot, the problem is that he doesn't seem to be aware of it). Sirius on the other hand seems a lot more self-aware than James. A lot of people are not going to like what I'm about to say but: James is canonically a better person than Sirius.

And yet, it is abundantly clear that both James and Sirius love Peter.

James gives into Peter's hands his own life and the ones of his wife and son. Sirius gives in Peter's hands the lives of the family he chose.

In the Shrieking Shack, under all the pain Sirius has for the death of James and Lily, it is evident that there's also the pain that comes from the betrayal of a friend.

"THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED!" roared Black. "DIED RATHER THAN BETRAY YOUR FRIENDS, AS WE WOULD HAVE DONE FOR YOU!" - Chapter 19, Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban

Lily herself is very attached to Peter, in her letter to Sirius, she calls him Wormy (how cute is that?). And, let's remember that she too puts her life and the ones of her husband and son in Peter's hands.

It's too easy to say Peter was just a tagalong, that they didn't love him. It incredibly diminishes the pain of his act.

I also would like to point out that Peter isn't stupid. He was a double agent, he managed to frame Sirius by using in his favor people’s low opinion of his skills (and Remus and Sirius' rocky relationship). James, Sirius, and Remus might have thought of themselves as smarter than Peter but I don't think they actually believed him to be stupid. Considering who the Marauders are, their knowing how good of a liar, and how cunning Peter could be, would be a perfect explanation of why they became friends in the first place.

Does this mean they all loved Peter but Peter only loved Remus out of his friends?

We can't really be sure of his feelings for Sirius, but the admiration he shows for James and the sense of guilt we know he has for his double agent activities don't really align with that image.

I think Peter's fear for his own life ended up winning over the love for his friends.

But why at this point? Why not at Hogwarts?

Something quite interesting is how Peter's father is the only parent of the Marauders who is never mentioned, not in the books, not in any additional material. Doesn't that align just so well with Peter always putting himself at the service of the most important male figure around? First James, and then after school, with the war going on, Voldemort.

Isn't it such a fitting image, Peter growing up without a father, with a too-cuddling mother whom he ends up resenting, faulting her for the absence of the father? It's so natural to paint him as a young man crushed by a sense of inadequacy towards an image of masculinity he idealizes but can't fulfill, supported by a society filled with a very toxic sense of masculinity and an absent father he can sew on any fantasy he wants.

When Peter was at Hogwarts, being friends with James, and being part of the Marauders, gave Peter a sense of security that allowed him to be brave enough to prioritize his love for his friends over himself.

Out in the real world, though, Voldemort is the dominant man and being positioned against the Dark Lord takes away the sense of security he had as a student. Both times Peter goes to Voldemort, he does it because he doesn't feel safe.

It's also abundantly clear how Peter's siding with Voldemort doesn't come from ideology. He becomes an animagus for Remus, he's a dear friend of Lily.

Peter dies because Voldemort doesn't trust him, and he is right in not trusting him. Somewhere in Peter, there's still the boy who risked his life for a friend.

Try to tell me this is not an interesting character.

He's still a coward overall, but a complex one.

Also, Peter Pettigrew is a clear victim of pretty privilege when it comes to the fandom. I'm ready to bet whatever you want that if he had been described as handsome the most popular ship with Sirius would be Sirus/Peter.

Actually, he didn't even have to be described as handsome, he just needed to not be described as ugly. Draco is described as having a pointy face and people have been lying to themselves claiming he's incredibly handsome for the last twenty-five years.

[nalyra-dreaming]

IWTV s2... an (emotional) recap

Between the spoilers dropping before the last three episodes and the content of the episodes themselves we really have gone through the emotional wringer.

I think I have rewritten this three times over, because my feelings kept changing.

I had hoped for more, I got more than I wished for, I wanted something else, they hit the nerve precisely...

And now with the season 3 announcement:))))

Maximum emotional carnage - indeed.

Everything ... up to that NOLA visit in episode 8 and the actual ending... is not the truth. Let that sink in.

The trial: scripted (and Lestat breaking out of it for the important bits)

Claudia's turning: So much... more raw.

Claudia's death: brutal. That final look between her and Lestat was one of the most painful things to witness.

Her diaries (pages): mostly unused. I am a bit unnerved bc of that wasted Merrick reveal and aftermath implementation tbh. Louis is not freed up after it, but... he should have been, imho. Though, that said, with Dubai likely a stand-in for Trinity Gate... maybe the arc fits after all - BUT I still think they could have done more with her diaries. I get why they wanted to escape the “white savior trap“ but this way Louis did not get that power-up that will ultimately bring him to where it frees him. But who knows... maybe they will implement a version of it all still.

The broadcasting and Loustat's relationship in general: Armand putting a fantasy retelling into Louis' brain. Holy shit.

Flashbacks to 1790: Self-indulgent fanfiction.

Dubai: Stepford Wives via mind gift. 💀

Daniel: Supposedly(*) turned out of spite. I absolutely get why DM fans are besides themselves with this and the comments after.

The story itself: More or less ending exactly where the first book puts us. I do NOT know why they kept that title a secret, it's not hinting at anything other than that simple fact, imho. :)

So.

You know, them using the movie "Gaslight" for the poster reference makes more and more sense now, because that is how I feel a bit at least: gaslit. Just a little bit.

Because... Nice reunion that you had there... too bad it will turn out to be the contested NOLA one, I would bet real money on it. 😅

......

Sarcasm aside, this is a brilliant show. But I am NOT looking forward to another two years of bullshit accusations (by some) because they were mostly/only spelled things out in the episode insiders, and only broke things up in the last episode. Or of people confusing the meta and social commentary level with the in-universe one.

Which, by the way, I'm happy that they went there. And I am relieved that they spelled things out in the episode insiders. Truly. But as experience has shown after season ONE... implied manipulations, episode insiders and interviews, and cast/crew/writer statements don't mean jack shit to some people.

So yeah, where does this leave us?

This was a dark season. I think I'm not totally wrong when I say that most of us did not get what we wanted from it, neither DM, nor Loumand, nor Loustat. Or Claudeleine.

"Locked together in hatred" comes to mind, though "hatred" is obviously (way) too strong a word. (But that quote fits so nicely 😏🤓)

We DID get some of what we wanted. But for a show which built so heavily on other books... to follow the first book then so closely?? I don't know, it leaves me a bit unsatisfied(**). It feels as if they just shut the book, to be done with it, you know?

I still enjoyed the season, there were brilliant parts in it. But it feels... bloodless. Sexless. Empty of affection. Harrowing. Which is, of course, the point.

This... is a depressing, hinting at suicide-through-vampires note.

Which won't happen, of course.

Because here we get to (**), which is of course ™️ them announcing s3 just prior to the last episode;))) And thereby making some things clear by that fact alone :)) 🙌🙌🙌

I said it before, I expect them to revisit... again. Given that this will be in what, 1,5 to 2 years from now? Well. Hopefully still in 2025. And I hope the arc they spun over these three seasons will be done then. And we can move forward.

I do hope this show will get 10 seasons. But for the first time since it aired I wished we'd already be ahead, in season 4 or something. 😅 Because this heap of loose endings is... taxing^^. Though definitely coming very softened as a blow now with the s3 renewal that’s for sure^^

Can't wait to hear your thoughts, if you want to share them. But these are mine. For now.

I'm sure there will be a lot of details, and analysis and meta to follow, and I'm looking forward to it. 🥰🙌

S1 and s2 were a tale... I mean we knew. But I would have preferred a bit more... truth.^^

Because that Magnus‘ tower scene?! No way. The metaphorical push off the tower??? No way, sorry Rolin but if they let that stay… that’s not giving agency that’s removing Lestat‘s suffering for their weird “toxic masculinity arc“ that Sam hinted at and which was - IN THE BOOK!!! - a misjudgment of Akasha.

AND it is removing Lestat‘s suffering to give more nuance to other characters. -.-

Given Hannah‘s episode 5 comments I hope they do not make a misjudgment of his character there. The red flags are there though, especially after the recent interviews, have been ever since that DV drop, and I have people come to me via DMs now to tell me they’re leaving the fandom bc they’re scared of another GoT…. which I get.

I… still have some faith. I know Rolin tends to put his foot into his mouth at times, he is a troll, and for all her takes on ep5 Hannah also wrote other brilliant scenes.

And we have Sam and Jacob as trump cards.

I‘m determined to enjoy this - this is what we‘ll get. I waited 30 years. I won’t go anywhere. I will enjoy what they give us.

I won‘t like all their decisions. That I am aware of.

BUT I will enjoy it, going in open-eyed, nonetheless.

(*) okay that is obviously bullshit, Armand would not turn him out of spite. Which is another hint I guess. But I talked about that in asks^^ At length 😅

[ernmark]

Juno Steel and the Case Closed (part 1) reaction

It's been a while since I've done one of these, hasn't it?

But it's the last episode, and I wanted to be here for the end. So if you'd like, some thoughts and theories under the cut:

It was a solid choice to have Nureyev go-- to make this final story about Juno and his world and his life, rather than specifically about their relationship. But also, the choices made around Nureyev's leaving-- holy shit.

Because here's a man who's spent the last twenty years entirely defined by his relationship with one man, and now he's cut loose and of course he's flailing to re-establish himself in a different orbit. And you can hear it in his voice, where it rises into something halfway to panic (amazing job, Noah Simes), and you can feel exactly how horribly wrong it's going to go if he goes down that road. And then there's Juno, who's healthy enough to be the voice of reason, even when it hurts him? Who makes it clear he's willing to wait until Nureyev is ready for him? Oh my god, that's perfection. (And Nureyev going maybe back to Brahma-- my little fanfic writer heart did a leap there). Nureyev may very well be back next episode (I suspect he will, if only for the final moments), but I really like this as an ending of their arc-- not the neatly laced up riding off into the sunset together, but looking forward to that sunset and being actually ready for it when it comes. It makes my heart feel so good.

--

And from that happy moment, to have Juno go back to Hyperion, to his office, and immediately start slipping back into his worst self? Oh, that's too real-- in a way that I am very happy with. Because he isn't 'fixed'. Juno 'born-a-sad-baby' Steel won't ever be 'fixed', not by romance or a vacation or a wonderful new family dropping him reminders of how much they love him. What's wrong with him isn't something that can be fixed-- but this time around it's different. This time around, when he yells at Rita she stands up to him (with a small, tremulous voice, because goddamn standing up to people you love is terrifying). I am so proud of her for that, and of him for backing off. It takes a palpable effort for him to rein himself in, but he's making that effort-- and he knows how, in a way that I don't think he did in those early seasons. It's a choice he's making, over and over again, just like it's a choice he makes to keep replaying Jet's wisdom instead of drowning his misery in tequila.

(Another kudos there: that Juno's problem isn't addiction, not the same way it is for Jet-- alcohol isn't a problem for him when things are going well, but it's easier to retreat into a bottle than to deal with his feelings. It's a distinction you don't see very often. Honestly, the way this show has dealt with addiction has been really refreshing to see.)

I've said from the beginning that one of the things that really drew me to this show was how it handles Juno's depression-- as a genuine mental illness that's an inherent part of him. And it's enheartening to see him struggle with it, but now be able to reach out for the tools and the support he needs. And that support doesn't have to be Jet literally talking him away from the bottle, or Rita or Nureyev petting him and making him feel better. He can reach for the pieces of them that they leave behind. And he can wish the Ruby 7 a good journey home, and send Nureyev to find himself, not without pain and grief, but without completely losing himself to it.

That kind of story gives me so much more hope than any kind of 'happily ever after' ever could.

--

And then the designated mystery, which has me so freakin' excited:

Nightmare.

She is the culmination of so many plot threads that I've been picking up on for so long and I'd completely forgotten about, and I am so freaking excited to see it.

I was in such a rough place emotionally when we last visited the most obvious of those threads, I genuinely don't remember if I posted meta about it or not, but it definitely struck some bells:

When Juno rescued Rita from Dark Matters, the safehouse she was in was described as being full of items that were clearly meant for a child. At the same time, Sasha was having Rita destroy all evidence of her own life so thoroughly that not even Rita herself would be able to find traces afterward.

It seemed most obvious to me that she was hiding a child (one that, I didn't realize until Juno remarked on Nightmare's area code, could have been hidden in the suddenly repopulated New Town without anybody asking inconvenient questions about who she was or where she came from). Also her taking care of a child would explain her ever-escalating reactionary tendencies-- she certainly wouldn't be the first parent who descended into authoritarianism in a misguided attempt to protect someone.

So some theories about who and what Nightmare is:

Alessandra's daughter is the most obvious, of course. (I still hold onto that theory that Sasha was either the Worst Client that Juno told Alessandra Strong about, or else that Sasha was the cheating spouse in that story.)

Nightmare could be Annie Wire's daughter-- assuming that Annie survived the factory, grew up, had a child of her own, and then died for real this time, leaving her grieving sister to raise her niece.

Nightmare could be Annie Wire herself-- dead, kept in stasis, revived by Dark Matters technology, and then whisked away to the safe house.

Nightmare could be a clone of Sasha and/or Annie. Honestly, not digging this theory, but I might as well throw it out there.

Nightmare could herself be a Radical, not unlike the Ruby 7, who's taken on Sasha's appearance and stayed that way ever since (after all, Sasha would have been at just about the right age when she was recruited by Dark Matters)

From a narrative standpoint, I'm most fond of the idea of Nightmare either being Annie or Annie's daughter, personally. Because that's literally the second mystery we were given, and it was pointedly never solved. As much as I like the idea that some mysteries just aren't and you have to make peace with that, I'm a big fan of long games like this, and of tugging on threads from the beginning of a story when you're wrapping up the end. That's especially true for Sasha's arc closing here, back in Hyperion City. Sasha's voice was one of the very first that we heard in this series, and Sasha's trajectory has always been a funhouse mirror version of Juno's. She's always been an integral part of his story. It seems fitting that her story gets wrapped up alongside his.

[queer-reader-07]

op could you elaborate on the she/her muriel thing. because i totally get what you mean but i find it so hard to articulate why... its just like. mmmmm. canon they/them character. but you wont respect their prns. but then again i enjoy when people get genderwierd w the ineffable spouses. would you respect my prns if you cant even respect a fictional character. is that the same thing. idk.

hi anon! i'll try best to elaborate, but apologies in advance if it comes off a bit... intense?

to give some context to my words:

i am nonbinary

i am afab

my pronouns are they/them

most everyone with the exception of close friends and people on the internet misgender me with she/her pronouns because they perceive me as a woman.

i think the root of it for me is that muriel has no experience interacting with earth, let alone humans, before they're sent down to be Inspector Constable. and because they have no experience with humans, they most definitely have very little context for the human construct that is gender. muriel's pronouns are they/them because those are the default gender neutral pronouns in english. muriel (like the other angels and demons) is referred to with they/them pronouns because, for all intents and purposes, they don't have gender.

whereas aziraphale and crowley (and even gabriel to a certain extent) have interfaced with humanity enough to have developed some level of understanding regarding gender, and possibly even an understanding of what they want their gender to be/be perceived as.

additionally, crowley and aziraphale play with gender in a way that feels very intentional to me.

crowley has canonically, in the show, presented femme. meta writers far more skilled than me have examined how, during the crucifixion scene, crowley is very obviously dressed more like the women in the background than the men. and it's not just in the historical flashbacks that we see crowley's genderfuckery. his modern look is comprised of a combination of femme and masc pieces. he wears a woman's cut waistcoat and his "11 years ago" look features women's sunglasses. all while inhabiting a decidedly man-shaped body.

i'm also just going to remind the audience that crowley outright denies being "a lad" in season 2. he straight up told us he's not A Dude.

aziraphale's genderfuckery is definitely less obvious and some might say debatable. that being said, i would make the argument that aziraphale's tendency to dress and present in a way that results in him being almost universally perceived as not only A Gay Man, but an effeminate gay man at that, is a quintessential example of gender as performance. and i do believe that aziraphale is making a very conscious and deliberate choice to present as a gay man. for fuck's sake he calls himself THE Southern Pansy, he knows what he's doing.

also, i know it didn't actually happen, but we almost got both of them presenting femme in the 60s so like. there's that too.

so, to me, it's ok to fuck around with crowley and aziraphale's genders in fanfic and art and the like because they do so canonically. the book makes it very clear that they are "man-shaped" but not necessarily men, ie they have chosen bodies that are perceived as being A Gender but that doesn't mean they technically are.

whereas muriel does not. muriel doesn't have a concept of gender because they haven't been on earth or around humans long enough to develop one. they are only ever referred to with gender neutral language. so it just feels really gross to me when people choose to she/her them. because to me it feels like saying "well this body that appears woman-shaped to me must mean they are a woman" which is a sentiment i, unfortunately, know all too well.

muriel is a character that is canonically referred to with they/them pronouns, on a major TV show on a major streaming platform no less. so it really fucking sucks to see people disregard that because they "can't remember to they/them muriel" or because they "seem like they use she/her."

to put it bluntly, every single argument i've ever read in favor of she/her-ing muriel has boiled down to "i just can't be bothered to remember they use they/them" and if you can't use a fictional characters pronouns correctly then i have zero faith you can use a real person's pronouns correctly. all i hear when i read those arguments is "i can't be fucked to do the bare minimum of gendering trans people correctly."

and lastly, i know it's genderfuckery when people she/her aziraphale and crowley because they're "man shaped" in the book and played by male actors in the show. but i don't have much faith that it's genderfuckery when people she/her muriel because i can almost guarentee it happens for no other reason than the fact that Quelin Sepulveda is a woman.

[jesncin]

I think what's funny about MAWS S1 is how the build up to the show's attempt at allegory for xenophobia don't really affect Clark's character that much. His anguish before he fights Parasitezilla is due to the general's exposition holograms, and it ends up feeling that stuff was just there to set up Lois's speech. Also, I just find it funny how the show had Ma Kent take the time to knit the shorts- not a whole suit, just shorts.

Exactly! I've said that this show has a "short term memory loss" problem where it slaps on a theme to a series of disparate events and doesn't go back to check if those scenes reinforced the theme they were leading up to. Parasitezilla/Ivo's motivation as a villain is unrelated to xenophobia and makes no sense (we can't trust Superman, he's some nice stranger! Unlike me who will provide self defense suits you'll have to pay to use, therefore you'll be more,,, trustworthy somehow? Because you paid a product to protect others and yourself? Never mind that his tech made no sense either I could go on about how awful their Parasite is). It makes it so Clark (or his friends) don't actually go through character development. Stuff just happened.

Haha I think it's so funny that people praise Ma Kent for adding the red underwear because on a meta commentary scale it's a return to form to have Supes in the red trunks again- but like in the context of MAWS Ma Kent was a total freak for doing that! Clark was gifted with a suit from an essentially dead culture and Ma Kent's first reaction is hmm I'm gonna add red underwear on this sacred dead foreign culture's outfit. It's clear the writers wanted to have their cake and eat it too- they wanted that magical girl transformation scene where the Kryptonians bestow an outfit onto Clark, but they're attached to Ma Kent sewing the outfit too so this was their compromise. Freak Ma Kent lol

[dreamylyfe-x]

Hi, I am pretty new to the Shameless/gallavich Fandom but first I LOVE YOUR FICS

Second, I've read some of your meta and I don't know about soaps but novelas and kdramas under my belt, I agree the come and go of Noel probably saved them from drama in later seasons, they probably have had them broke at one point also, they refused to make Mickey a principal, but one of my fav parts of s4 is that he finally gets his own arc (pimp and all that apart) and I'd have loved to see him explored outside his relationship with Ian

Hey! What an amazing surprise this is!

First of all, thank you.

Second: Novelas, kdramas (I have watched my share of t-dramas -- Devil Besides Me and Meteor Garden forever), Shondaland -- they will all give you the gist of that soap experience. My feeling is that we'd get a season six where both Mickey and Ian sort of struggle to figure out their adult lives -- and that's probably a decent enough story. They likely marry them in season seven. And then they spent seasons 8-11 (or however many seasons they get to keep them) messing them up. Not because Shameless burns plot the way soaps and novelas do, but because 11 seasons is a lot. And at some point they will decide they need conflict for Gallavich and that conflict will be in the era of Gay Jesus-type writing and I'm confident we'd have been very upset by it.

I will say I don't think they so much refused to make Mickey a principle as they didn't know for sure what they wanted to do with American Mickey or where he fit into their pretty full roster. Like, there was always a chance for him, since I believe his British counterpart sticks around, but he's not filling the same role that US Shameless Mickey does. Also, shows has a budget and I can completely see how they might not have had the money for him until season three.

In season five, Cam and Noel did an interview with Buzzfeed where the EP, Etan Frankel, talks about how Mickey turned into the character he'd become at that stage, and it's clear that they don't quite know where they're going with him, and then once they shoot 1x7 they know they've got something interesting to pursue. There are a lot of moving factors in making use of that, though, including Cam's age and how ian's character balances out with his siblings in terms of storyline. Gallavich get one of the most dramatic moments of the entire series in season three and I think that's really when they shift into being primaries on the show. More and more, they start to drive fan engagement online and that sets up season four where, absolutely, Mickey vaults ahead in terms of how much the show is paying to his inner life.

Part of that is because Cam is off filming The Giver, so he's not around for half the season, but I think the other part is what Etan is talking about in the Buzzfeed article -- they just know Noel can deliver. I particularly always think about this quote, in regards to both Noel and Cam as individual performers, but also when I think about their creative partnership:

As a writer, you feel secure writing a scene knowing they're going to knock it out of the park and they'll find things you didn't necessarily intend, so you find beautiful moments. It's exciting to see those dailies come back and saying, Oh wow, that wasn't even a moment in the script, but they've made it become a moment.

I know this is why we get so much Mickey in the first half of season 4. Not just that he needs to carry the torch for Gallavich by himself but because the writer's room knows they can give him that scene with the picture in the bathroom and the performance will convey how much Mickey misses Ian. This is also clearly when he essentially becomes a point-of-view character -- and he continues to be until he leaves the show in season six. So many key moments in those two seasons, particularly around Ian's illness, rely on the audience seeing Mickey's reactions and moments of realization. His confusion in 4x12. His reaction to the suitcases. His meltdown after Ian is hospitalized, where virtually his entire reaction is silent across two episodes. It's really great that they trusted him to do that. It's one of the reasons I think the story works so well.

Anyway. I find it a little jarring, when Mickey comes back, that he isn't quite the POV character he was. It improves in season 11 and we get more Mickey-centred storylines. But I feel consistently (particularly in the late seasons when I'm really not that invested in the rest of the story) that there was a lot more room to use Mickey the way they used to. But by then, it's a different kind of show.

[happilyfeatherafter]

Happilyfeatherafter’s ficrec Fridays

Back back back again, and I don't know guys, I think we should all just totally stab Caesar! Welcome back to a new fortnight of fics that I’ve read and loved recently.

If you want to find more you can see my previous rec lists here!

15 March 2024

Are You Writing From the Heart? by  @luckshiptoshore is now complete!! Congrats Luck! Full disclosure, Luck is one of my very best friends, but that just means I know not only how much of a talented fic writer she is, but also how much of her heart and soul she poured into writing this love letter to queer storytelling, season 4 Destiel as a romcom, meta text (and subtext), and finding out who you really are when society and your upbringing is fighting against you. Castiel is a ghostwriter for L.S. Shore's Supernatural novels about Neal and his brother. Caught in a storytelling rut, Cas finds himself adding the fallen angel character of Bel...what could possible go wrong? Meanwhile at his local writing coffee shop spot, he meets the handsome stranger Dean who is an up and coming standup comedian and Supernatural fanboy. They because firm friends, but that's definitely it because Cas is straight....right?! Following these two dummies as they FAIL TO USE THEIR WORDS is a total joy, as Luck's humorous and emotional writing paired with her eye for detail is so very on point, and I'm so excited more people will finally get to read this story in full.

Baker Six by komodobits because !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot tell you how goddamn excited I was to get this email notification and finally be back in 91w world, and to witness these early stages of Dean and Cas' relationship through Dean's eyes at last. This barely needs a rec because it's THEE 91w Dean, but komodobits hasn't missed a beat in getting back inside their heads and I was once again swept away by this iconic love story against the odds. Head the trigger warnings as always, this is truly on the front lines as a medic in a war zone. Baker Six was written for the very good cause of the fandom Palestine fundraiser, in support of the Palestine Children’s Relief Fund. Please donate if you can!

Truth & despair by @shallowseeker was a recent discovery and such a fascinating read! It's set in a post-15x18 verse, but importantly it features a fun Sam narrative perspective that delights in his lens by...being a bit of an unsympathetic oblivious dummy (affectionate). I really appreciate a crunchy Sam characterisation and oooboy does this pay off. Dean is steeped in his grief for Cas, and Sam is oh so concerned. He reaches out to Mia Vallens to understand his own grieving, and that leads to him making a discovery...Dean's memories of Cas' death aren't what he claims happened. With the unwelcome reappearance of Chuck (he lost...didn't he?) and LITERAL sinkholes appearing in the fabric of the universe, can they figure out what's happening to save Cas and save the world? This wip plays with physics, theology and narrative fuckery in such intriguing ways. I can't wait to see how it wraps up in the next two chapters.

The Leap by @friendofcarlotta started reading this one when Tina reshared it on Leap Day...because of course. I'd actually read it before but it more than lived up to the reread. 'Castiel Krushnic is a police officer in Soviet-occupied East Berlin. He is also gay, in a city where that’s a dangerous thing to be. One night, he meets Dean Winchester, a mechanic from the American sector. Their mutual attraction is instant, and a convenient hookup quickly turns into a passionate love affair that defies all rules and expectations.' Meticulously researched, emotional, heartrending and thought provoking. I highly recommend taking the leap on this fic!

See you in two weeks and OMG it's @deancaspinefest time!!!! I'm so excited *clears calendar*

Tag list under the cut - let me know if you'd like to be added to be notified of future recs!

@dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you

[suchine-toki]

hello! I read your Tae meta from last year and just wanted to say it was great and really gets to the bottom of the problems with how Sorachi handled Otae. My (unasked for ;)) two cents is that I think he was going for GinTae endgame but then changed his mind somewhere before Lesson 238 which I read as his way of giving a 'this is how it would happen but I'm not going to do it' resolution for GinTae. And it's fine to drop the romance but knowing he's not going to make any couples endgame and 1/2

Hi! First of all, thanks for reading and taking your time to send this to me, I really like hearing other people's thoughts! I hope you don't mind that I combined both asks, given that they've points in common and I already had a draft of the one I received a while ago 🙈 This made me realize that I hadn't thought about it too much before… Even if I've talked about this topic with other people before, usually, the conversation ends with us agreeing and moving on to other topics lol so I think this is the first time I'm analyzing it. I'll try to do it from both the characters' perspective and Sorachi's intentions as the story's author. Before continuing, I want to clarify that my intention isn't to convince anyone to stop liking it, I just wanted to explore this topic and wow, did I explore it, because it ended up being much longer than expected 😂

That said, I think one of the biggest reasons why many of us thought Tae was going to be Gintoki's main love interest is because of the setup. Tae is the first woman from the main cast to appear in the series, and her dilemma kickstarts the story and allows for the formation of the Yorozuya as we know it. Moreover, she's Shinpachi's older sister and also develops a strong bond with Kagura, so it was expected that she would also develop a strong romantic bond with Gintoki, connecting her to the main trio of Gintama.

However, as I mentioned in the previous post, things started to change with the introduction of Kyuubei, which solidified the Kondo-Tae-Kyuubei love triangle, and then with the introduction of Tsukuyo. I watched a video by Abbie Emmons titled "7 Deadly Romance MISTAKES Writers Make ❌ avoid these chemistry killers!" to help identify some points in the relationship between Gintoki and Tae, although I must mention that I don't think these were mistakes on Sorachi's part, quite the opposite, they were very conscious decisions. I won't go point by point; instead, I'll summarize the intent of the message.

Half of the video is about the development of intimacy between two characters. I think most of us can appreciate that at least until the Benizakura arc, it was clear that Sorachi still had in mind to develop the relationship between Gintoki and Tae romantically because they'd a scene where they were alone, had time to talk, and showed that they cared a lot for each other. However, as the series progresses, we stop seeing these kinds of scenes between them, as well as scenes where they're seen thinking about each other or having physical contact.

And although at the beginning of the series Tae participated more actively in the Yorozuya dynamics, after the introduction of Kyuubei, they're seen spending most of their time together, even when they're with the others. Tae remains an honorary member of the Yorozuya until the end, but it's clear that Sorachi wanted her to represent stability, emotional support, the place they can return to that will welcome them with a smile. So, even though Gintoki and Tae still care a lot for each other, their interactions will continue to be framed within the context of the Yorozuya for the rest of the series.

That said, I couldn't say exactly when Sorachi stopped considering a romantic relationship between them. I'd to look up chapter 238 because I didn't remember what it was about lol (for reference, it's the one where they're at a stall and there're only speech bubbles, in which other characters who look like Gintoki and Tae confess they're in love), and I think your interpretation is certainly interesting. The placement also makes sense, which is shortly after the arc introducing Tsukuyo, and it also follows the trend of other characters being the ones who tease them, and not themselves.

The other half of the video is about how the characters' relationships with the rest of the cast are shown. It's highlighted that there needs to be an emotional reaction from a character to the idea of the other being interested in someone else, something Sorachi showed in many different ways but not with Gintoki and Tae. In her case, at most, she was shown getting annoyed at Sacchan, but only when she was provoked first. When it came to Tsukuyo, there was no reaction. Similarly, Gintoki has no reaction when Kyuubei or Kondo demonstrate their love interest.

The last point of the video, but not less important, is when characters have more romantic chemistry with other characters. In Tsukuyo's case, I think Sorachi was already a more experienced writer who knew his characters better and knew what his story needed. In particular, I think he wanted Gintoki to have someone close with whom he could relate but who wasn't directly connected to his past, among other things. And as I mentioned before, most of Tae's emotional energy in the series is with Kyuubei, followed by Kondo.

But why Sorachi didn't continue developing Gintoki and Tae's relationship romantically? The most obvious reason is simply because he didn't want to lol, but the explanation behind this, I think, is due to two main reasons. The first is that he wanted to keep the relationships within the Yorozuya platonic, and since Tae is an honorary member of the Yorozuya, it felt wrong to establish that there were romantic feelings involved. By comparison, it would be like confirming a relationship between Kagura and Shinpachi. And yes, Sorachi did some ship-teasing more than once between them too, but at the end of the day, he chose not to pursue it, and I think maintaining the familiarity is a cause.

The other reason is that as he wrote the story, he realized that Gintoki and Tae didn't fit well together. Tae can give Gintoki a sense of stability, but what can he offer her? Tae clearly values stability as well, hard work, having money. But Gintoki, due to his circumstances, doesn't meet those standards. If you think about it, the only two occasions when Tae unequivocally showed interest in Gintoki were when he lost his memory (Memory Loss arc) and when Hijikata was in his body (Soul Switch arc). Two occasions where Gintoki wasn't himself. But she liked that he seemed more serious and diligent, which implies that Tae's type is different.

It's also worth mentioning that Gintoki isn't shown making the same gestures towards Tae that Kondo or Kyuubei, the other two characters who are canonically in love with her (which is why I think they're a good benchmark) do. For example, while Sorachi chooses to show Gintoki teasing Tae about her breast size, in contrast, he shows Kondo buying her a kimono that will look good on her regardless, you know, like a supportive partner would. Even with all this, I understand that het shippers might've felt uncomfortable with the idea of pairing Tae with Kondo, and the other viable option was Gintoki. I think Sorachi was also aware of this, which is why he decided to develop Kondo and Tae's relationship in the final arcs.

While we're at it, I prefer kyuutae by faaar. As I've also expressed before, although I think Kondo is a great character, his persistence doesn't sit well with me. But whether it was due to heteronormativity or because Sorachi identified with him as a fellow gorilla, it's clear to me that he decided to emphasize Kondo and Tae's relationship much more. Even when gintsu and kyuutae were stagnating, he continued developing kontae as much as he could (probably because he'd already done the heavy lifting with the other two ships, tbf).

Sorachi didn't plan many things in his story, which I think is both a strength and a weakness. One of the things that reflect this is, for example, that Hasegawa was originally going to be part of the Yorozuya, an idea he later abandoned, but the remnant of Hasegawa's presence in the series remained. In the same way, I think his initial idea was to pair Gintoki with Tae, but eventually, he didn't. It seems that he also had the idea at the beginning to end the series with certain couples, but later decided to leave an open ending in that sense, although some of his inclinations were clearer than others.

I've seen people say there're subtle hints throughout Gintama that they fell in love, and while I don't want to say those interpretations are wrong, I think Sorachi is quite straightforward when it comes to these kinds of things. Even with unrequited loves, like in the case of Katsura and Ikumatsu, he showed that there was love. However, in the case of Gintoki and Tae, during the 15 years he wrote the manga, he didn't, probably because he felt it no longer fit the story after a certain point. That said, I think their relationship works just fine without the need for any labels.

Thank you again for stopping by, if you've another point that you would like to discuss feel free to message me or send another ask 🤗

[mamawasatesttube]

this is like a kinda weird pair but what do you think kon's thoughts on/relationship with bruce is?

the hardest part of this is, i think, deciding on how on gods green earth to nail down a bruce characterization when he's been written so wildly inconsistently across so many comics. generally i try to characterize him as like... a good man, overall, but incredibly emotionally constipated and prone to really putting his foot in it now and again because he's got like control issues and whatnot. i think in a lot of comics he turns into more of a plot device (and white male power fantasy, conflict driver, etc) than a consistent character, so it kinda makes it hard to be like "man i wish he wasn't an asshole" but also i just dont think he can be a total dickwad and still be a hero bc imo that makes the entire meta fall apart. heroes have to be good (can be incredibly flawed, but have to be good) for the genre to work, i think. otherwise its like oh boy thats just cops.

so that being said...

i think bruce cares for kon in the way of any awkward-but-well-meaning parental figure with their child's best friend. i also think he's absolute godawful dogshit at making that clear at any point. i don't think he particularly has any reason to dislike kon other than when writers try to make him racist against metas or play him into misogynistic "my daughter can't have friends who are male!" tropes, which i just kinda. tend to throw out personally, so i don't really think they have that sort of conflict, but i do think kon doesn't really know what to make of him because he knows bruce has pulled some shit with tim (like tim's 16th birthday fiasco, which is imo the kind of thing thats like. in character for a bruce-esque fuckup. literally wouldve been fine if he'd just told tim like hey this is a practice exercise i want you to take seriously. tim wouldve happily larped about it with him like cmon man), AND with cass, two people kon definitely cares about. but kon adores clark and bruce and clark are pretty close, so i think to kon he's in the nebulous space of like "weird distant uncle-ish figure" or something.

i DO also think bruce is fond of kon in a distant but anguished way because he saw firsthand just how badly losing kon affected tim, and quite possibly cass if we kinda just. throw out the stupid mind control arc and let her like. have a storyline that isn't whatever the hell that was. also there's something to the fact that an alternate universe kon was his robin. he probably learned about that when kon reported back to the jl after hypertension arc. i think he probably had at least one (1) emotion about it but didn't tell anyone.

the comedic version however is that bruce finds out that baby kon wanted parents so bad, is deeply affected because he is NOT immune to a little guy who wants parents, and keeps really awkwardly trying to dad at him but he's so weird and awkward and distant about it that kon straight up has no idea what he's doing. who the hell just bought him a new oven to replace the one in his apartment he complained to tim about one (1) time??? tim swears it wasn't him so what the hell??? bruce is pleased with himself, kon is so fucking confused, and clark meanwhile will be laughing his ass off about it all.

[decepti-thots]

do you wanna talk about your opinions re: Drift in fanfiction, maybe?

I think fanfic Drift is something of a game of fandom telephone tbh. There's a core that has been steadily whittled away by fanon repeating itself enough it seems shallow. The thing is that a lot of IDW1 canon has been subject to this directly, because it wasn't of much interest to folks writing fic while the MTMTE stuff was ongoing, tbh. When Dratchet became a focus in the LL run, stuff got reevaluated about Drift in shipping terms, rather than as character analysis, I think. And it became more abstract through that, and it encouraged Fanon Drift TM.

A lot of fanfic-Drift does not incorporate pre-MTMTE canon for him. This is understandable, because in its own right, that stuff is not very good tbh. But much of what we see now in fandom is... a clear reaction to fanon that sprung up independently, and so is trying to pose a counterpoint to things that only exist in fanon, and the whole thing becomes a mess of self-referential shit if you take it only on its own terms. Drift often only exists as a discussion of those issues in fandom, and where the writer falls on them right now, or when the fic was being written. (Much early Dratchet fic treats Drift as something of an afterthought and Ratchet as the obviously identifiable protagonist, lbr.) Fanfic-Drift is more a litmus test for fanon than a character in his own right, even when he's being written more strongly in canon, I think. He's a cipher. What fandom decided to make that cipher mean is interesting.

I have a whole post I could make about how people's ostensibly anti-regressive takes on 'was Drift a [metaphorical] sex worker, and if so what are our ideas about that' are still fundamentally bound up in anti-SWer ideas and fandom conversations more than canon, because it's all just a reaction to fanon fundamentally based in terrible ideas about what sex work is. (By which I mean I have one post idea I have repeatedly junked bc uh. Don't want to listen to people get shitty about sex work.) But at base level, a lot of fandom's idea of Drift is basically rooted in this idea of the 'theoretically sympathetic addict who has extenuating circumstances we need to articulate for him to be sympathetic, but who is still Abject bc of all that' which I think go so against what we see of him in pre-MTMTE media. Here are some things I think fanfic is bad at engaging with: Drift is an addict, and not the kind of addict a lot of fanfic wants to talk about. Drift is isolated in a way that is not easily explained by people being unfair to him. Drift has strong political opinions that inform both him joining and defecting from the Decepticons. If Drift was a sex worker, metaphorical or otherwise, that is clearly the least important thing in any shame he has.

But more important than those nuances, I think, is that Drift just isn't... allowed to be based on his canon stuff period? It feels honestly slightly irrelevant in the face of just. How much fanon Drift stops being based on extrapolating from his canon actions and starts being a character who exists purely to serve other characters. I think a really interesting take on him needs to do something with that sense he is someone who has deliberately buried what he wants to get what he wants. If you don't go a little meta with it, you get nowhere; and if you do you get something far more interesting than the 'ummmm sad SWer ig, ratchet kindly saves him' idea. See also: his most interesting canon relationship, and I say this as a dratchet shipper, is STILL Drift and Rodimus, because it dictates way more of WHAT THEY DO that Dratchet doesn't manage. Dratchet is great but canonically mostly exists as a culmination to a plot we are filling in behind the scenes; Rodimus and Drift exists as an ongoing discussion outside that. tbh.

tl;dr: sex worker drift would be great if anyone writing fic understood it has Zero to do with canon and approached it as such. it's not canon and people only think it's canon bc of bad opinions about what sex work is. either way i love drift. none of this is coherent sorry. we have discussed some of this before, and i have sharpened my opinions ig?

[andreal831]

Love all the meta's, they're the next best things to updates on your fanfictions!

My current question is, what do you think of the relationship between Davina and Elijah? And what direction would you have taken it in, if you were in charge of the originals?

First, I promise I will update soon!

Now, onto the question. I've always thought the relationship between Davina and Elijah was underrated and a little confusing.

Elijah is the first Original that Davina really meets. Even though Marcel is holding Elijah hostage thanks to Klaus, Elijah doesn't attempt to escape. He has multiple opportunities to escape but he never attempts to overpower her. Instead, he wants to talk and let her make her own decisions. Elijah always prefers diplomacy first if it can resolve their issues. This is incredibly important for Davina because no one has given her that power in her life, not even Marcel. Elijah allows her to take control of her own life by making a deal.

What I never understood about their relationship was where it went wrong. Elijah holds up to his end of the bargain and brings Davina pages of Esther's grimoire. Yes, he controls the first spell to save Hayley but then offers to let her pick the next. Elijah teams up with Marcel to protect Davina from Klaus, knowing he would do something reckless. He even feels guilty that he didn't anticipate Klaus targeting Tim. Davina takes out her anger over Tim's death on all three men. I always felt like her anger toward Elijah was a little unwarranted. At this point, he hadn't done anything against her. I think a lot of her anger at Elijah likely came from the writers wanting to create clear divides in the warring factions.

Their relationship after this clearly only gets worse, but again, a lot of it is simply Davina's anger at vampires in general as she and Elijah do not have a lot of contact. She is a teenage girl trying to find her place and being used by a lot of different people, so I don't necessarily blame either of them.

If I was in charge of The Originals, Elijah would have actually had storylines and connections that didn't revolve around Klaus. I would have loved to see Elijah play a more protective role in Davina's life, especially after Rebekah left town. Elijah was protective of Marcel as a child and we see him often wanting to save people he views as innocent (Elena, Marcel, Katerina). Elijah was initially protective of her, refusing to drink her blood when he was first released, trying to protect her from Klaus, being concerned when she disappeared. Davina's character was often used as a prop to further issues and the fact that she was a teenage girl who had lost her entire life was forgotten. I think this is partially because the show wants to age up characters so it's not creepy when they start dating super old vampires. But she was just a teenager and for the most part had no one helping her. Sure, Marcel, Vincent, and Cami would be there occasionally, but they would also abandon her for months and only pop back up when they needed something.

Elijah had a very paternal character. To me, he was the only Mikaelson that truly showed a desire to have children. It would have been nice to see him take Davina in and protect her rather than spending all of his energy on Klaus.

I hated how they often put Elijah in the position to make the hard decisions to save the Mikaelson family and Hope in the later seasons. Everyone loves to say Klaus would do anything to save Hope and will forgive his every action, including trying to kill Davina in Season 1. But as the show attempted to redeem Klaus, they still needed conflict, so they sacrificed Elijah's character. It's ironic because a lot of the things that, to me, seemed out of character for Elijah to do in Season 3 and 4 wouldn't have happened had Klaus not been so controlling of Elijah. All of this to say, if Elijah had been able to develop a better relationship with Marcel or Davina, I think he would have acted differently. Although, Elijah is pretty pragmatic and his family was running out of options.

Davina and Elijah have a lot in common and both deserved better from the writers.

Thanks for asking!

[horse-girl-anthy]

The Rose Bride: Power from Passivity

when I was first seriously trying to understand RGU, I struggled the most with how to understand Anthy. I was seeing a lot of people frame her as the mastermind behind all the manipulations in the show, yet somehow, this didn't feel right to me. on the other end, I would see people who defended Anthy's innocence in the events of the story, either by selective reading or blaming Akio as the cause of everything. I also couldn't quite accept this view, though I did feel it was important that Anthy not be condemned. through a lot of time and thinking, I have come to my own conclusions about Anthy, her powers, and her role in the narrative.

in an interview, lead writer Enokido describes Anthy as a personification of when reality enters a drama. going further, he states that because he and the other writers do not know everything about reality, they cannot know everything about Anthy, either:

Enokido: Because even us creators can’t understand Anthy’s inner thoughts (*note: naimen = inner feelings, interiority, true self). We created her while in search of that.

–. You can’t understand anything?

Enokido: That’s right. After all, there are things about “reality” that neither I nor Ikuhara can understand. Like you know how in this world we live in, there are things we think are absurd or things we can’t confirm.

from these statements, it's clear that Anthy was designed as a character it is impossible to fully grasp.

Ikuhara echoed Enokido's description of Anthy as reality in this interview, going on to call her "a rare sort of character." there are many reasons why she could be considered unique, but I want to focus here on something else Ikuhara said about Anthy in the same interview:

Ikuhara: As for whether Anthy's character herself is venemous, I don't know the answer, and while I depict her in ways that make you suspect she is, I plan to never show you whether that's out of ill will or not.

the ambiguity of Anthy's character is very important. she always has plausible deniablity; her worst deeds are implied from a clinical distance. further, Ikuhara brings up the question of intentions. even when it's unambiguous that Anthy is doing something (for instance, helping Akio to poison Kanae in episode 32), there's usually not much indication of what Anthy is feeling or thinking. it's like she's not even there.

I've always been struck by this little scene from the beginning of episode 23, when Anthy is employed at being Mamiya. she's totally alone here. if Anthy is doing Akio's bidding with full consciousness, then why do we get this scene? but on the other hand, can I say that Anthy doesn't know what's going on? of all the characters in the show, she has the best idea of what's really going on in the social system. again, contradiction and cognitive dissonance.

Anthy is magic, not of this world. can I, as a normal human being, imagine what it would be like to one second be there, and then the next to vanish out of my clothes? it's impossible.

then the question becomes, what is the nature of Anthy's magic? she is called a witch for her crime of taking the prince away from the world. that was her last free act: I would argue that Anthy's magic as a witch is not actually something that she uses as a free agent. this was first put into words for me by Alice on the Imagine Me & Utena podcast (I believe it was their focus episode on Anthy)--after listening to others debate on if Anthy truly has bad intentions or not, Alice asked, does Anthy use magic, or does magic work through her?

similarly, in his episode commentary for episode 23, Ikuhara wrote:

People’s happiness or unhappiness shouldn’t be determined by struggles over the device called “the Rose Bride.”

I find the term "device" to be an interesting one. from a meta perspective, Anthy is a device for the writers: she is used within the narrative to acheive the story's aims. she is a device for Akio: a thing to be used. in a parodoxical way, Anthy's disempowerment is her power, and her passivity allows the world to take shape around her.

Anthy became the Rose Bride through the trauma of the Swords of Hate. they left her empty. in episode 38, she says, "I thought I was just the Rose Bride, just a doll with no heart." the emotional core of the story is the search for her true self, Utena's desire to reach the heart that Anthy had forgotten she once had. however, Anthy plays her role as the Rose Bride to the end, even after she has shown her true face to Utena.

how exactly do Anthy's powers as the Rose Bride work? as a device, a mechanism, I believe that the Rose Bride simply responds to the social environment of Ohtori, with the final aim of bringing about the "End of the World." this is getting kind of esoteric, so I will use an example from the show to illustrate: a reading of Miki's early interactions with Anthy.

did Anthy go and play piano at the end of episode four in order to manipulate Miki to duel in the next episode? or is she simply manifesting what is in his heart? watching how Anthy interacts with others carefully, she operates as a projector screen, becoming whatever someone is fixated on. further, the way that they view her can radically affect the way she is portrayed from episode to episode. while Anthy becomes a demure angel for Miki, she is a two-faced schemer in Juri episodes.

the process doesn't stop here. next, the Rose Bride brings reality crashing down on characters' heads.

during Miki's first duel with Utena, Anthy suddenly cries out in support of Utena. this action seems wildly out of character for her supposed role in the duels. again, I believe Anthy does this because of a truth buried within Miki himself. the falsity of his pursuit of the shining thing is what Anthy exposes, revealing that the object of his affections might not be what it seems. as the Rose Bride, Anthy repeatedly destroys other characters' self-images, their worlds.

of course, Akio does appear to be pulling the strings behind Anthy's machinations throughout the narrative. perhaps this is because Akio is the End of the World, a harbringer of the death of the self. however, Akio seems incapable of riding out the process himself, staying stuck within the system, its enforcer and slave. and although he subjugates Anthy, he is tormented by the fact that she is beyond his grasp no matter what he does.

Anthy must have gotten some satisfaction out of Akio's torment, but she is more tormented than he could ever imagine. in a way, I feel as though Anthy is somewhat prideful of her position as Rose Bride; she feels that it is unchangable, a fact of life, and her adjustment to it is what allows her to keep surviving. thus, accepting things without complaint is wise. Utena is the one who challenges that, threatening Anthy with change, which can be terrifying even when what you know is endless suffering.

Anthy stabbing Utena is one of the only times that she acts out of her true feelings and her role as the Rose Bride in unison. here, I don't want to parse out all of the complex interpersonal reasons Anthy the person had to stab Utena, but instead point out that it continues to fit with the Rose Bride's purpose: she brings reality to Utena. this was always going to be the ending to her desire to be a prince, cemented when Utena takes the swords for Anthy.

the true sickness of Anthy's passivity is on display with her acceptance of the Swords of Hate. although the Rose Bride is the greatest instrument of power in Ohtori, it does nothing for Anthy herself; it comes at the cost of her sacrifice. that it is why it is difficult to frame Anthy as a mastermind. it was never going to be as easy as Anthy just making different choices, since sacrifice is demanded by the swords. she was only getting out of her position by someone taking her place, so she resigned herself. that resignation made her the subaltern base of Ohtori, able to take any form within it but her own. she must exit to be a real person.