#and i really want to know what his whole deal with being a pacifist is

[the-kneesbees]

I thought we were gonna learn his secret I already knew he was gay what's the secret

[inbarfink]

Any analysis of how Undertale deals with Pacifism and how it tries to guide the Player towards it has to take a deep look at Papyrus. Because Papyrus is the one character in the game who will never kill, the one actual ‘True Pacifist’ in the game’s main cast. 

I mean, the Player can be an even bigger Pacifist. Papyrus does still FIGHT, and the Player can get through an entire run without draining a single sliver of HP. But… they can also be the world’s biggest murderbastard and literally stab reality to death. 

Toriel would very much like to not kill, but she is also fully capable of doing so.

Same with Asgore, but he has a lot more actual blood on his hands. Undyne and Mettaton are both fully 100% willing to kill to accomplish their goals. Sans is non-violent in most runs because he’s too lazy and depressed to do anything, and when he is motivated into actions - it is in the form of a FIGHT to the death. Alphys… the timeline is a bit fuzzy cause both she and Mettaton love lying so much, but it seems like she did sincerely add deadly weapons to Mettaton cause killing humans would make him more 'useful' and then had second thoughts once she developed a parasocial relationship with the Human Child and THEN she and Mettaton started hatching their little play-acting plan. I think??

With Papyrus there is NONE of this ambiguity, we know for sure - no matter what timeline or what may come - The Great Papyrus will always choose MERCY.

And the interesting thing about that is on a Meta-Sense, Papyrus is a very rare example of the game giving MERCY towards the Player. 

Because the game starts out being really obtuse with the Sparing mechanic and how it works. If you want to be a Pacifist in Undertale from the get-go, you’re gonna have to work for it. You're gonna have to figure it out on your own and commit to it and believe that it's possible. It's basically a test of your own belief in non-violence and your moral integrity. Then, the RUINS end with the Toriel boss battle - in a way, that’s probably the hardest Sparing puzzle in the whole game. And it’s very very easy to accidentally kill her. (I’d almost say that’s the intention of the battle, to try to goad the Player into Resetting so they can see how the game remembers across RESETs)

And then we have Papyrus, and it’s not just that his ‘Sparing Puzzle’ is something as simple as outlasting him and letting him run out of dialogue - and it’s not just that he’s the only boss that will just give up and let you continue if you lose to him enough times. it’s also that, just as Papyrus is the only boss incapable of accidentally killing the Player - he’s also the only boss that the player is incapable of accidentally killing.

(Okay, fine, to be pedantic, there’s also Asgore)

I mean, the Player can certainly kill him if they want to - but draining Papyrus’s HP just makes him skip through his battle dialogue right to the end of it. It’s designed in such a way that, no matter what Route you're on and no matter what approach you take with Papyrus - you will always end up on this screen.

Unlike basically any other Monster in this game, including the major boss battle just before him - you can’t kill Papyrus accidently. You can't kill him without also having Sparing him as an option. The game kinda treats killing Papyrus as one of the Worst Things You Can Do because killing Papyrus will always be a deliberate, considered action done to a person who will not kill you and who has stopped wanting to FIGHT and has extended a hand of Mercy. With the game clearly communicating what you need to do to Spare him at that moment.

And that means that - even if you killed before, even if you don’t have the patience of a True Pacifist, even if you spent all this time in the game without even trying to engage with the Sparing mechanic… as long as you don’t want to be a Huge Rat Bastard, the game is basically gifting you with the very very easy option to not be. Being a Pacifist in Undertale is usually a challenge - a puzzle to be solved, a test to pass. But as long as you aren’t intentionally trying to be the Worst Person - the game is basically giving you Papyrus. 

If you accept his Mercy, you are accepting the game’s Mercy. That sort of benefit-of-the-doubt assumption that maybe all of the LOVE you might have accumulated so far was all due to honest mistakes or panic or an attempt in self-defense. That you still deserve this one chance to prove that you are not intentionally, maliciously cruel - or at least not like the Worst Person in the World. Even if you did kill before, you still deserve at least one friend.

And Sparing Papyrus leads you to his wonderful Hangout/Dating Sequence and to his Phone Calls and they all add so much wholesome charm to the Undertale experience and no matter what happens Papyrus will always think the best of the Player and he will always trust them and it also makes Sans also kinda your buddy by default. And more than just adding a little bit of wholesome charm into even the more LOVE-filled Playthroughs, I think this is meant to try and incentivize these players into trying out the Mercy mechanic a bit more.

Whatever it’s, like, for future playthroughs or Resetting the game right there to try a True Pacifist Run right there and then or just trying to be a little kinder for the rest of this current playthrough - especially since there’s an emphasis about the close friendship Papyrus has with the upcoming boss Undyne, and to a lesser extent with his idol and next-next boss battle Mettaton. It’s like “well, if you didn’t figure out how to spare before, this is how you do it? And isn’t it nice to have a friend? Isn’t it nice to not have to kill this lovable skeleton man? You should do this more often wink wink nudge nudge!”

And it’s like… all of Papyrus’ loved ones care about him so much but they also look down on his pacifism. They see his inability to kill and desire to make friends as simple naivete and that’s why all tend to hide the truth from him all the time. About what will happen to the Human he will capture, about what his new Human friend might’ve done, about the fact that they view him as so naïve. 

They admire it on some level, that’s why they want to protect it, but they also see it as a weakness which is why they want to protect it by lying to him all the time. But, you know, Undyne says that if Papyrus goes into battle he’ll be ‘ripped into little smiling shreds’ and that is certainly what happens every time a Player chooses to refuse Papyrus’ Mercy and the game’s Mercy and press that FIGHT button…

But have you thought about all the times that doesn’t happen? All the careless or violent players who were offered that skeletal hand of friendship, accepted it and then carried that offered kindness forward for the rest of the game? All the players motivated to do good for the sake of their buddy Papyrus? All the Murder Routes stopped because the player just didn’t have it in them to kill someone who believes in them so earnestly?

Like, no, it’s not a surefire thing - especially since Papyrus has so much less narrative power than the Actual Unkillable Time God that is the Player. But it happened, and it happened many many times to many players. Papyrus offered Mercy, the game offered Mercy. And much like Frisk’s Pacifism, it comes from a place of seeing the honest goodness in your ‘enemy’ and can inspire them to become a better person - this little sparkle of goodness being passed forwards. 

And I think that’s beautiful, even if it didn’t happen in every timeline. Any potential future where Papyrus’ kindness can have such an effect on the Player and thus the entire trajectory of the Underground validates his kindness and pacifism on some level - even if there are also always the potential worlds that it backfires completely. 

And there’s also one other way in which the Great Papyrus Proves Pacifism Pays. One that is a bit more practical, perhaps. And one that Papyrus himself is not even aware of. 

Papyrus’ boss battle can be a surprisingly challenging one specifically because he is the only one who doesn’t kill the Player.

Like there is a reason why Papyrus will just offer you to skip his Fight after you lose to him three times, because if he didn’t do that - there’s an honest risk that the Player can get stuck in a much stuckier way than anywhere else in the game. 

Because, like, for basically any other character in the game, being killed is the Worst Thing that could ever happen to them. For everyone except the actual Player Character because we are an Actual Unkillable Time God and dying is nothing more than a minor annoyance that sets you back to your last SAVE Point. So, leaving aside Papyrus’ admirably kind intentions - there is not much material difference from the Player’s perspective between getting Captured and getting a more traditional GAME OVER. Except…

Except getting Captured does not undo everything that happened in your inventory during the battle. In every other Undertale battle, if you use all of your items but still lose - the GAME OVER at least means you get your stuff back. But because Papyrus doesn’t kill you, any healing item you’ve used during the battle is still used. I have watched so many Undertale Let’s Players waste all of their valuable items on their first Papyrus battle and then have to face him again without them and thus do even worse in their second go… and then their third go... and thankfully then Papyrus offers them to skip the fight.

And while that technically can be circumvented by just manually closing the game and opening it back again on their pre-battle SAVE Point, a lot of players are gonna reflexively Save over it if they pop over to the Shop or the Snowed Inn before their second attempt at the battle. If Papyrus didn’t offer that chance to skip his battle, it could’ve easily become a softlock situation for a huge chunk of players - because he doesn’t kill the Player.

Most of Undertale deals with the value of non-violence from a standpoint of morality and kindness and personal connections. Since most people do die when they get killed. But when dealing with an Unkillable Time God like the Player, Papyrus proves that not-killing might actually be the most practical solution.

Of course, it doesn’t seem like Papyrus is aware of any of this. From his perspective, he is just offering genuine mercy to a being just as ephemeral as he is. But it accidentally turned into one of the most effective methods of blocking the Player’s way… at least he didn’t offer us an opt out so soon after that. 

And it’s interesting when comparing him to how his brother Sans - one of the few people actually aware of the existence of SAVEs and RESETs - deals with the Player. Because the Sans boss battle at the end of the Murder Route is entirely based on the concept that death is nothing but an annoyance to the Player. Sans is less trying to kill the Player (the way Undyne the Undying did), he is simply trying to annoy the Player into a ragequit. But he is still killing the Player.

Now imagine a Sans battle where he has all of his usual annoying tricks, but also instead of killing you - he captures you just like his brother would’ve in a happier timeline. And while it’s not a fool-proof plan to stop the Player in their tracks - he could very easily stick them in that sort of softlock situation where they have to battle him again and again without any Healing Items. Forcing them to either abandon the game or RESET the whole world back the way it was - just like Sans wants them too. 

But instead, by killing the Player, he is just allowing that perfect second-third-fourth-fifth-sixth-try where they get all of their Stuff back. And he does actually knows that. And why doesn’t he do that? (Speaking here from an in-universe character study perspective. Obviously the Doylist answer is that the game doesn’t want to Softlock you even in the most deliberately-frustrating part of the game).

Maybe, even though he intellectually knows that killing the Player will be of no help - he still does it because he wants to. Because he just wants to get back at the evil murderous monster that took his brother from him and destroyed his entire world even if he knows it’s actually ineffective. And this thirst for bloodshed is, ironically, blinding him from a new exciting way to actually practically stop that murderous bastard who is themself motivated entirely by bloodshed. 

Maybe he just can’t do something like that. Reducing an enemy to exactly one HP and then stopping is not a feat anyone else in the game is capable of pulling off - even the ones who would obviously use such a thing (like Toriel or a Player with a Pacifist intentions). Maybe it’s something that requires a lot of hard practice and discipline and carefulness, that Sans never thought to put in because he didn’t see it as a useful skill the way Papyrus did. 

Maybe that wouldn’t have worked anyways. After all, and that’s something I kinda touched on in a previous Overly Long Rambly Hot Take - Sans’ War of Attrition against the Player is greatly helped by the fact he can’t remember every single previous try and so he can’t get exhausted the way the Player can get. Obviously, without a GAME OVER induced RESET that will not apply. Which is especially notable because… Sans’ laziness is literally what brings him down at the end of that Boss Battle. 

So maybe, while Papyrus, as long as you decline his offer to skip the battle, is capable of offering just the same Battle as before over and over and over again.... It’s possible that Sans just won’t be able to pull off two or three or more battles of the same intensity and difficulty in a row without a RESET to undo his own exhaustion. 

But I think it’s at least worth considering the option, y’know? That after all this time of viewing Papyrus’ kindness as sweet-and-yet-kinda-foolish-naïveté - that exact viewpoint made Sans overlook the perfect solution to dealing with his little Murderous Time God problem. Cause he just never considered that while killing might be fully morally justifiable in this situation and very very satisfying, that does not necessarily mean it is actually the most practical solution. And that maybe, in a weirdly twisted way, Pacifism WAS the answer.  

[homelanderbutbig]

Hiiii it's me again 😌 so I was reading that one fic you did where y/n convinces homie not to kill a rude coworker and was wondering about the whole pacifist. I understand wanting to be a peaceful person completely but as someone with anger issues I also feel like pacifism can only be done to a certain extent. So I was wondering, what would be the thing to make y/n crashout? And how would homie react? Would he be mad that they got into a fight? Would he be proud bc his s/o just beat up someone that is bigger than them? Id love to know your thoughts on this.

If I can give a bit of an explanation here, I'll try not to go on too long lol. I was abused for about 10 years of my childhood, which is why I connect so strongly with Homelander. And it's also why I reflect my own experiences when I write my Homelander x Reader fics.

But for myself in terms of how I deal with stress, I'm the opposite of Homie. He reacts externally and aggressively, his go-to is to threaten and to commit violence. I don't get mad when I'm stressed, I react internally. I go silent, shutting down and dissociating because it's too much for me to handle. I was hurt as a child, and never want to enact that hurt onto others. Meanwhile, Homelander does.

This dichotomy is what I like to reflect with Homelander and the reader. They are not the type of person to get angry and lash out, regardless of what happens in a tense situation. They want to use their logic to avoid aggression at all costs. That's why I label them as more of a pacifist. They're also a mediator, which is why their relationship with Homie involves them being the one to calm him down when he's on the edge. I kinda envision them being two sides of the same coin; they've both gone through trauma in their childhoods, and although they deal with their issues differently, they understand each other all the same.

I apologize if this wasn't really the answer you were looking for, but hopefully this explains my reasonings well enough! I'm also including a little goofy doodle to visualize their dynamic. 😂

[profounddefendorcrusade-blog]

I feel bad for Starlo. (pt. 9)

Star's the Papyrus (both are idealistic & seen as naive) of this game (Martlet is another possible parallel), even though he's got similarities with Undyne too. No matter how broken Ceroba seemed he asked himself WHY she did what she did and I think that's SUPER important.

Ceroba didn't do this. Her first instinct was to be harsh (after being harsh with him even BEFORE he attacked Clover):

called his personality "damaged" before this scene

... you never asked yourself WHY he did the whole sheriff act.

.... you never asked WHY he didn't want to grow up. If it was a coping mechanism, if he wanted to help his community in a way he couldn't as a farmer? It was never on her mind.

Yes he has baggage but he's dealing with it all while uplifting others, Ceroba has baggage but is well taken care of by Star and at least has him, he has no one but himself and his optimism to pull him out of negative feelings, and still gets insulted.

Yeah Ceroba's been through stuff but apparently it's been some time since Chujin passed and Kanako fell down, she should have at least started to support Star emotionally like he's been supporting her (sure, he did so with distractions, but as he said "aren't distractions what's best for all of that?" He did his best). Problem is she DIDN'T realise he was ever struggling with self worth and only assumed he was goofing off. Either that or she did nothing about it aka was too occupied with her own problems (which are valid but still... she should have tried at least a little) Cer's character flaw is being too stubborn and devoted to Chujin. She trusted him blindly and wholeheartedly. Everything else came in 2nd place. This is clear as day.

It hurts knowing Ceroba could never respect Starlo the way she still does her husband. Not saying she shouldn't admire Chujin, but the way she sees Star as a goofy manchild whose lifelong passion can go "too far," the way she sees all this Wild East stuff as him "just having fun," the way she thinks that only someone whose brain isn't developed would ever consider dating him just... ticks me off, tbh. That's why I think the guy needs someone who will be gentle and patient with him, even if that other person is going through tough times.

She DID call Starlo the best sheriff she's ever known (honestly the only sweet moment between them in pacifist, but it is very brief, especially in neutral where he just gets cut off; also I hope she was being genuine here) and said how everyone adored him (but hated his persona, which I've already covered: basically they either hated 'North Star' as a whole, which I hope isn't true, or just how excited he was to meet Clover, which makes no sense to me; already covered it as well)

Bonus: Dina didn't know who Star really was or what he looked like, not before the end credits rolled (when he shows up as himself & she's also seen there; makes sense that he finally came clean to her):

So he's literally been playing this role 24/7, ever since she became the bartender; ever since this town started to exist. It's impressive how he could keep up an act AND use this fake accent for so long

Bonus #2: Star was SUPER worried about Clover's safety; that's what REALLY upset him (he cares about that child sm). THAT's what drove him off the edge (unless he naturally has a temper, i don't think this is it tho). Either way, he was way more patient w Ceroba than I think most would have been in that situation. Sure he snapped a few times, but there was a good reason to. He still TRIED to reason with her. Why did he attack? Worried for Martlet & Clover. I honestly think Star's the type to only get super angry if someone he loves is in danger (minus the stuff that happened which led him to cracking)

[the-puppet-bracket]

Spamton propaganda:

"You know someone had to do it.

This guy's whole thing is not wanting to be a puppet anymore, but uh-oh-spaghetti-o! Dude now has physical puppet strings!"

"Making a [SPECIL] deal by placing his [#1 SALE SYSTEM] into a [CLASSIC!] body, Spamton believed he could be more than [HYPERLINK BLOCKED]. But the strings told him otherwise. He lunged at Kris in [LIMITED TIME OFFER], trying with all his [50% OFF!] to be more than a puppet."

"Spam email bot who was exposed to something that drove him mad and he spent the whole rest of his existence trying to cut his strings, only to die (maybe?) when he finally manages it."

"He is the most tortured dumpster man alive. Also, not literally a puppet, but metaphorically!!! There's some mysterious outside force controlling him and limiting what he can say and god, he desperately wants to break free, trying to kill the protagonist (his only friend in years) for the chance of ""being let loose from his strings"". In his secret boss battle, he thinks he'll be free after getting a new body but he isn't, as his new powerful body has literal strings attached. You fight him, because he thinks your soul (long story) will gain him access to freedom. During the pacifist route of the battle, you cut his strings until there's one more left, he's ecstatic, being able to break free from the narrative of the confines of the game. He decides to break his own last string, and he falls to the ground into pieces. It turns out he relied on the strings after so long, and couldn't recover without them. Afterwards, he's deshevaled, hung up by vines in the dark basement that resemble his old strings and he says ""It seems after all I couldn't be anything more than a simple puppet."" This ties back to how Kris, the protagonist of the game is feeling the effects of being controlled by the player and really shows the core focus of the game and it's characters. And that's why I entered him into this poll!

Also he is genuinely so fucking hilarious bro just play Deltarune already what the fuck are you doing the chapters that are out rn are free dawg (play Undertale first though, it's like ten bucks or something you'll be fine)"

"Spamton best blorbo. Very good blorbo. Exquisite blorbo even. He's sad and adhd and insane and weird and I love him and you should too. Pipis"

"he spamt"

"[[NUMBER ONE RATED SALESMAN 1997]]"

"he's living in a goddamn garbage can. let the big shot win. it'll be funny. does he deserve it? that is up to viewer discretion. but he is our beloved tumblr sillyman and as such we need to pay him respect in some manner. <3

(iirc spamton is a puppet? probably. oh well if he doesn't count ignore this i'm not read up on

my deltarune)"

"frankly i'd be surprised if he's not one of the most submitted. anyway his whole Deal is about being a puppet and having other things control him and so he seeks to regain that control through either manipulating the player into murdering half the city or to take the red soul and use it to become a god. yet in his super powerful NEO form he still has strings attached to him (that he won't even notice if he succeeded in the player manipulation thing) and in either case he ultimately becomes an item you use just for stats. guy really isn't a fan of puppetteers"

"you propably knew this was coming lol

Tumblr's favorite awful little puppet desperately fighting to get rid of his strings

the pinocchio references are strong in this one

HA HA HA ... THIS POWER IS

FREEDOM.

I WON'T HAVE TO BE JUST A PUPPET ANY MORE!!!!

...

OR... so... I... thought.

WHAT ARE THESE STRINGS!? WHY AM I NOT [BIG] ENOUGH!? It's still DARK... SO DARK!"

"Tries to become a real boy, ends up as another puppet look guy. He's shady, he's a scammer, he's got cringefail swag and I love him"

"He's just a little fucked-up little guy"

[cliozaur]

- There’re new facets of Éponine revealed in this chapter. Also, Thénardier is back, and he irritates me even more than usual. There is so much going on here that I don’t know where to start!

- Probably, Éponine was the last person Patron-Minette expected to meet at the Rue Plumet. But I think it was not a coincidence that she was on watch near the house. We don’t know for sure, but probably she somehow learned about the planned raid. It was the first time she followed Marius to the house (because, unlike him, she does not stalk people), and what a coincidence! It was the night of the raid! Although, with Hugo, you never know, maybe it was a coincidence after all.

- When she said, “There is a dog,” the first thing I thought was that she is talking about herself, and it turned out that I was right! Her monologue about being a daughter of a wolf, but at the same time being a dog herself, is absolutely stunning! (We already know about one “dog son of a wolf” in the Brick.) Well, after some thinking, I am not surprised that Hugo makes such a big deal out of comparing criminals to wolves. After all, even in the nineteenth century, wolves were part of French people’s day-to-day horrors and nightmares. (I will write more about it when I have time.) She is full of determination to become a “dog”—she even stopped using argot. In the same monologue, Éponine once again mentions her suicidal tendencies: she is extremely brave in this situation only because she is not afraid of dying; in fact, she wants to die, as we already know. And the way she declares: “There are six of you; I represent the whole world,” is a sign that the ideals of the barricade boys are not so foreign to her. Some descriptions related to her physical state are again heartbreaking: she is coughing her lungs out (reminding me of Fantine before her death). and this depiction of her hands “small, bony, and feeble as that of a skeleton” brings tears to my eyes!

- Patron-Minette also deserves some discussion. (Just look at them in the illustration below—aren’t they amazing?! What is it that Brujon holds in his hands? It looks like a huge screwdriver!) It’s so curious that none of the original quartet behaves as a leader here. At the beginning, it was Thénardier who led the group and insisted on breaking into the house, despite Éponine’s threats, and at the end it was Brujon who had the last, decisive word. I really like how the personality of each of them shines through their interaction with Éponine. The fucking Thénardier once again did not recognize his child and then was extremely rude to her¬. However, closer to the end of the chapter, he tried to manipulate her (as he used to do in the past), saying that the robbery would provide them with the means to exist, but this time, he did not find any sympathy in Éponine.

- Montparnasse is also extremely rude and ready to use violence against her—to grab and hold her, and even to cut her throat. (I think that there is a big chance that this is how their relations could have ended if they had continued them.) But Babet is surprisingly pacifistic: “I don’t hit a lady.”

- At the very end, they are retiring to the sewers! It’s so intriguing: “‘Where shall we go to sleep to-night?’/ ‘Under Pantin [Paris].’ / ‘Have you the key to the gate, Thénardier?’”

[stephenjaymorrisblog]

Benjamin Netanyahu

The Menace to World peace

Stephen Jay Morris

April 14, 2024

©Scientific morality

            The world would be better off with pacifists than with avenging angels. What religion has taught us is not to trust the followers of any religion. They always put a square peg into a round hole. They twist God’s words to fit their own agenda. If God is so fucking omnipotent, why does he need Christian soldiers, Jihadist warriors, or the I.D.F. to levy his punishment upon evil doers. I suspect he doesn’t really exist. Even common sense will tell you that God doesn’t need an army to implement mega-universe domination.

Sounds kind of primitive, doesn’t it?  It is. Simpletons have this fear of so-called evil. They make the fatal mistake in feeling that the only way to deal with evil is to destroy it. That is a gigantic fallacy. Evil will always replace itself. Someone once told me that there will always be good versus evil. That I do not accept. What is evil? That is a subjective question.  What may be evil to you is good to someone else.

            Ever since the 60s and 70s, I was told that the older generation sends the young to war to fight the gerontocratic political schemes. One thing about narcissistic old men is that they know their time on earth is almost up. So, they want the whole world to die with them. The phony good is really the true evil. Or maybe, just maybe, there is no such thing as good and evil. There are people who have mental disorders, or angry people who have personality maladies. They need healing, not punishment.

Then, those who think violence solves everything will give you an example of “what ifs.” “What if someone is raping your wife? Would you give the rapist a therapy session?” We are talking about the long term, you dumb fuck! Not an immediate, singular situation. Of course I would do anything to stop such an act!  Prevention of evil is wiser than revenge.

            If we are going to have World War Three, can we at least wait until the NBA playoffs are over? It only takes one leader that suffers from a messianic complex and thinks himself a Jewish prophet: Benjamin Netanyahu, the not-ready-for-prime-time minister. He wants to drag the United States into war with Iran. The Likud Party initiated it when it bombed an Iranian consulate in Syria. Of course, Iran wants to retaliate. So, they launched hundreds of missiles and drones toward Israel. And, of all those fired, just one missile penetrated. One? After spending millions and billions on Israel’s Iron Dome, you’d think all missiles would be deterred. Can the IRS refund my tax money, then? I need it for some plumbing work in my bathroom.

            Benjamin Netanyahu is not my leader. I didn’t vote for him to be pope of the Jews. What he has done for Israel is to apply a permanent scar in history. What he has done and is doing to the Palestinian people is genocide. Repeatedly spewing the details of Hamas’ horrific attack on October 7, 2023 is not justification for that genocide. The question really is, with Israel’s technological and logistical advances, where were the border police that day? Was the Iron Dome turned off?  I know I won’t get any answers to these questions.

            Being opposed to Revisionist Zionists does not make me Anti-Semitic, it makes me pro-humanitarian!

[lookismaddict]

Lookism: Rendezvous 🔞 (Ch. I) || Gun Park x Fem! Reader ♡

Author’s Note: Hi, I hope everyone is doing ok! If you’re reading this right after the Intro, I’m so sorry that I wrote such a long part for just an introduction to the story. I just wanted to provide the MC’s backstory so that it’ll help you guys understand where the story is going. But I do hope that you guys enjoyed the Introduction, and I hope you’ll like Ch. I as well!

NSFW Warning: Violence, strong language/cursing, and light sexual content (?).

Story Summary: You traveled abroad to help support your mother who is sick, back home in Japan. However, once you reached Korea, everything went downhill until you met a stranger who offered you a deal that could benefit you. But who knew that this special encounter would turn your whole life around…

“I’m sorry… what was that? You want me to be your what?”

Gun leaned against the wall that was next to him then lit his cigarette once more. “I said that I’ll turn you into one of my greatest masterpieces. You got potential to be a great fighter. If you get proper training from me, then I’ll make sure that you’ll develop into a pure unstoppable force.”

You crossed your arms while you scoffed to the side. “What? So… what are you implying? That I LIKED fighting? Haha sorry to burst your bubble, but I only did that by chance just to survive. Hell, that was actually the first fight I had. I’ve never fought in my life. I’m not a thug.”

Goo crossed his arms sternly. “Sooo… you mean to say that you’ve been a pacifist until now? I don’t believe that one bit sweetheart. You better be honest with us now or else I’ll have to find out through my OWN way.”

You took a step back wearily while holding both of your hands out in front of you towards Goo, trying to stop him from coming any closer to you. “I swear! Why would I even lie about that? Besides now I have another problem. I don’t know where the hell I’m at right now. I just lost everything that I had. And plus, I have nowhere to go, and now I’m stuck with you two lunatics!”

Goo was just nodding while listening to you rant away. On the other hand, Gun’s face remained expressionless. His mind was wandering somewhere else, trying to put the pieces together in his head. Like he was trying to calculate some sort of big equation. “Hey.”

You stopped blabbering your issues to Goo as the both of you turned to Gun who seemed to finally get what’s going on. “You weren’t a fighter from the beginning. Yet, you somehow knew how to fight. So, if you didn’t have prior knowledge about fighting, then you must’ve gotten them from somewhere. Have you been exposed to someone doing some type of martial arts training recently, or have you watched some type of show or documentary on it?”

You thought about it for a minute until you realized…

Yes, I have.

“Ah, well… Back in my hometown, I used to work part-time at a small karate school. My job there was to just bring materials during class. Like wooden boards, and planks, and all that. I didn’t really get to participate physically, but I always watched the students being taught by the head master. I’ve always found it really fun just to be there, and watch how karate was taught by professionals.”

“Then that’s all I needed to know.” Gun smirked, making his way back towards the exit of the alleyway until he paused at his tracks. “Oh I almost forgot to ask.” Suddenly, he turned his head back towards you. His gaze was so sharp that it pierced right through your whole body, which sent shivers down your spine.

“What’s your name?”

Your eyes, barely hanging onto his gaze, didn’t blink once. “It’s (F/N) Sasaki.”

“I see.” He turned his back towards you once more before continuing to exit out of the alley. “Come on, I’ll drop off Goo first before I figure out what to do with you.”

Goo raised an eyebrow. His eyes switched from Gun, to you, then back to Gun again before chasing after him. “Hey, wait up! What was that just now, you checking her out or what?” You heard his laughs bounce off the walls around you, as you stood there still trying to process what just happened.

What’s going to happen to me now?

You sighed as you willingly followed both of them out of the alley. It’s not like you had a choice to go with them anyways. When the streets were finally in view, you saw Gun and Goo both hop into the front seats of a black expensive Rolls Royce car parked on the other side of the street. You looked both ways before crossing the street, heading over to where they were at.

You got in the backseat of the car, shutting the door behind you. You buckled up and let Gun take the wheel to drive to Goo’s supposed destination. You leaned against the side of the car door next to you, staring at the street lights passing by. At the same time, you listened in on Gun and Goo’s conversation as they exchanged words in hushed voices.

“Gun, what made you decide on taking her under your care? I’m guessing it wasn’t just because you think that she’s a good fighter. Right?”

“Well, think about it. She said that she’s been watching people do karate for a while. We don’t know how long she’s been doing it for, but we now know where she got her new skills from.”

“And? What does that have to do with your verdict?”

“You’re not thinking any harder dumbass.”

“Hm…” From the right side-view mirror, you watched Goo close his eyes. He was pinching his own chin in between his two fingers, trying to concentrate.

The car filled with a long minute of silence until his eyes shot open like a light bulb just lit up above his head. He then turned to Gun with a mischievous smirk saying, “Ohhh, I get it now. She reminds you of Daniel Park, huh?”

Gun’s mouth curved devilishly, returning a smirk back to Goo’s realization. “That’s right.” His eyes seemed focused on the road in front of him, but his mind was somewhere else. Both of his hands were steady and firm on the wheel, like he just had a clear goal in mind and now he is willing to fulfill it no matter what.

Daniel Park? Who’s that?

“I did confirm that Daniel had the Copy Ability, like Johan Seong, the Copy Genius. Both of them would have turned into monsters if they were to have accepted my offer, but no matter. At least now, I have a secret weapon in my grasp. I got lucky this time.”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk. What are you saying? I was the one who found her first. She’ll be besties with me in no time. Right, (Y/N)?”

You jumped in your seat and quickly pulled your eyes away from the two of them, pretending that you just didn’t get caught listening in on them. Your eyes became so focused on the window, staring intently at the plain street lamps above you while the car drove by.

Crap. I wished I accidentally fell asleep in the car instead of eavesdropping on them like this.

Goo chuckled to himself knowing that he had been watching your movements ever since you got in the car, from the side-view mirror on his side.

As the expensive luxury car sped through the night, your eyes started to close little by little, drifting off to a long and lulled slu-

“We’re here.”

Not this time Satan.

Thank god, you were alarmed by Gun’s call. While you were rubbing your eyes to cease the sleepiness, you looked out the window until your jaw dropped. You couldn’t believe your eyes as they trailed up towards the top of a very large building. Large letters that said, “One MCN,” stood at the front of the building’s entrance. You wondered what type of company owns the building in front of you and what business does Goo have to be going to such a place.

Goo stretched in his seat then whipped around to turn to you. “(Y/N), have you thought about what we talked about?”

Is he talking about the “secret friend” thing?

You slowly nodded. Goo smirked and leaned in closer to you while clinging onto his seat. “So what will your answer be? Will you accept?”

You thought about it for a second, but you already know what the right answer would be.

You leaned in closer to him then whispered into his ear…

“No.”

Goo clicked his tongue with slight annoyance. “Ah, so that’s your response huh? What a shame. I hope you won’t regret it later on in the future.” He gave an ominous smile to you before turning back to Gun. “Well I’ll see you whenever, regardless of what comes up in my schedule. I’ll be looking forward to what you have in store for (Y/N).”

Gun clenched the steering wheel in annoyance that you could’ve sworn that you saw the veins from his hands popping from high blood pressure. “Yeah, yeah, just get out of my car already. And remember, you owe me next time. I already repaid you just by being your driver for today. You know how much I hate being in Gangnam.”

Goo grinned at Gun while slamming the door right in front of him, silencing Gun’s nagging. “That bastard.” Gun muttered under his breath. As he switched the car’s gear stick to drive, he hit the gas and sped away. Startled, you turned your head around and watched Goo’s figure getting smaller and smaller as he stood in front of the building’s entrance waving goodbye at you. Your heart was still palpitating quickly from Gun’s acceleration, but you swore that you caught a glimpse of Goo’s eyes for a split second. His eyes gave off such an uneasy vibe that you didn’t stare at him for too long, so you turned back towards the front of the car.

What did he mean when he said that I might regret my decision in the future? Was that an actual threat from him?

The thought of crossing him again made your palms sweat nervously. Well now, at least you don’t have to deal with two intimidating men. Now it’s just down to one. Although you were relieved to see Goo go, Gun’s presence still made you a bit uneasy.

However, just watching him drive seemed to have calmed you since your eyes have been scanning him for a while. You checked out his face from the backseat through the rear view mirror, looking as sharp as ever. Since you were closer to him now than when you guys were outside, you can smell a whiff of his musky cologne that must’ve been expensive. Your eyes moved to his broad shoulders and his muscular build underneath the multiple layers of clothing he had on was visible, which surprised you. This made you wonder how strong could this man be if he were to remove each layer, piece by piece…

“Have you eaten yet?”

“No, I hav- . . . Eh?”

Your words seemed to have gotten stuck in your throat until you realized that those words that he just spoke weren’t in Korean. They were in Japanese.

(Now speaking in Japanese)

“EHHH?! Did you just speak to me in Japanese???”

“Yeah, why are you so surprised?”

“Well, I didn’t know that you’d actually speak in Japanese. You caught me off guard! But wait a minute. How did you know I was Japanese?”

“You told me your name, remember? Your family name is obviously Japanese. Plus, no Korean woman who’s a local around here would be at that place where we found you, at this time of night. Unless, you’re a prostitute…”

Your cheeks flushed in deep scarlet, making you cross your arms and looked away in embarrassment. “A PROSTITUTE?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?! No way! And even if I was a prostitute, what kind of prostitute would beat up her own customers?”

Gun flinched from the loud tone of your voice just now. Afterwards, he shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly while his hands were still on the steering wheel. “Alright woman, I get it! You didn’t have to be so loud. But I don’t know, you tell me.”

You were so furious that you were about to retort back at him, until you were reminded of your belongings still back at that shady bar. “We need to go back...”

“What?”

“I said, we need to go BACK! That asshole still has my luggage bag!”

“What asshole? The hell are you on about?”

At this point, you gave a brief summary of what happened, to Gun. You explained what started the fight you had with one of the two maniacs in the first place and what your first experience was like when you first arrived in Seoul.

Gun suddenly hit the brakes in the middle of an empty street. Good thing there weren’t any cars around during this time. His head turned around to look at you, with such intensity. You weren’t sure if it was due to irritability from having to go back and get your stuff, or anger from the assholes who happened to manage to pull something off like that. At that moment, you didn’t want to question him any further.

“Where’s the place at?”

You tried recalling what the bar was called from your memories until you remembered, “Venus’s Paradise.”

Gun stepped on the gas, as he made a sharp U-turn back towards the place where you first arrived in Gangnam. The U-turn was so sharp, that you could feel the force from the acceleration weigh down onto the side of your body, squishing you onto the side of the car door that was next to you.

About ten minutes later going about sixty-five miles per hour through the empty streets of Gangnam, the two of you finally pulled up in front of the dirty bar. Gun immediately unbuckled his seatbelt then turned to you, making sure you understood his instructions carefully.

“Stay here. Whatever happens, don’t get out of the car.”

And with those words, he slammed the door right behind him and made sure that the car was locked. You anxiously watched him walk into the bar alone, worried that he might not come out of that bar alive.

Fifteen minutes had passed and you were starting to worry even more. Your hand nervously pressed against your chest, feeling your heart hammering through your chest. At that point, you were debating to yourself whether or not you should go into the bar to retrieve him. You hugged your knees inside the car then laid your head onto your knees sighing. “I hope he’s ok.”

All of a sudden, you heard yelling getting louder from inside the bar. “What’s going on in there?” The front door suddenly bursted open, as a guy came running out from the bar full of blood from head to toe. You realized that the guy was actually Tae. His face was all bruised up as his left eye looked swollen and his bloody nose was left crooked sideways. His uniform was ripped almost to shreds. The stitching on one of his arm sleeves seemed to have been torn right off and one of his pant legs was barely hanging on. Your eyes widened at the sight of Tae quivering in fear on the ground next to the car that you were in.

A loud bam was heard as the door to the bar swung open violently. Another guy flew out through the door then landed flat on the ground, now unconscious. That man had on a brown leather jacket and underneath was a long sleeved cheetah-printed polo shirt. Golden chains were wrapped around his neck and the sight of him reminded you of Ryuji, since they both looked alike. His body was also covered in bruises and stains of blood.

Who could have done this? Wait, it couldn’t be-

The bar’s front door suddenly flew open once again, as you saw someone kick the door open. Outside, came Gun walking out of the bar without a scratch on him. However, a bit of blood splatters was stained on his clothes, his face, and on his hands. While making his way back towards the car, you noticed that he successfully managed to get your luggage back!

Tae’s eyes widened at the sight of the unconscious, bloodied man in front of him being stomped all over by Gun. His body was being walked all over over by him without remorse like he was just some insect. Even while he was rolling your luggage bag behind him, the man on the ground remained unfazed when his body was being violated by your big luggage bag. Tae slowly backed away from Gun as much as possible, until his back met the car door where you were sitting behind it, watching their every move through the tinted window.

Gun stopped in front of Tae. His eyes glared down at him with such a threatening look that it almost caused Tae to urinate in his pants. “Move.”

Tae quickly nodded as he scurried away down the street, yelping like a scared chihuahua. Gun then took your luggage bag and stuffed it in the back trunk of his car. Afterwards, he made his way back to the driver’s seat then closed the door on his side before starting the car.

You were curious about how he managed to even get your belongings back so you asked, “How did you do that?”

Before he started driving again he lit a quick cigarette, with a soft exhale of smoke escaping through his lips. The smell of smoke filled the inside of his car, making you cough a bit but you didn’t mind.

“I just went in there, and spotted that big suitcase of yours from across the bar. That last guy that I just saw was holding onto it while he was talking with his buddies, so I went up to him and just beat him up. It wouldn’t change a thing if I just asked them to hand it over.”

He then switched the gear, then started driving off, heading back towards the direction that he was supposed to go to before he got side-tracked. You just sat there in the backseat trying to process what he just explained. “All you did was just beat him up? But what about the rest of the guys that were with him? Wouldn’t they have done something to you too?”

“They tried to, yeah. But I had to take care of all of them as quickly as possible, since I got other important matters to take care of. There wasn’t much that they could’ve done though. They were all weak in the end anyways.”

“W-what…?”

They were all weak? Who is this guy? And what incredible strength he had. How could he have beaten all of them at once? He was up against so many guys, yet he came out of that alive?

“Then, what happened to their boss? Did you have to fight him too?”

Gun sneered, as he took the cigarette out of his mouth then extinguished it onto the ash tray that laid next to him. “Did you see that other guy that was laying outside of that bar? He made such a good carpet.”

You gasped, clasping your hand onto your mouth in shock.

That was HIM?! Who the hell is this guy, Iron Man? Or- THANOS?!

You weren’t aware of it, but Gun was watching your reaction from the rear view mirror while he was driving. For a split second, he couldn’t help but smile in amusement from your animated facial expressions. “What an amusing woman.” He whispered to himself before his smiled faded back to his original stern face.

The tinted Rolls Royce car sped throughout the night, zooming past every obstacle that couldn’t dare touch Gun’s beloved car.

Finally, the two of you arrived in front of a large modern-styled mansion as he drove through an iron gate that automatically opened on its own. The driveway to his house was very wide and openly convenient. There were short marble steps that led you up towards the door of the mansion, which was accompanied by small traditional Japanese trees on the sides of the steps, that were probably imported from Japan. From above, there was an outdoor balcony that overlooks the open surroundings of his house with a nice view that was probably to-die-for.

The architecture of his home made you gawk widely, fascinated by how large his home was as he parked the car right in front of the driveway. His garage was already filled with other expensive luxury cars, so he decided to park his favorite car in front of his house.

Wide-eyed, your eyes enveloped the scenery of such a lavishly polished home. “This place is so stunning…” you murmured in awe as you exited the car. Gun got your luggage bag from the back trunk then handed it to you, for you to stroll yourself. “This way.” He said in a commanding tone while walking towards the door.

You followed him, still starstruck at how amazing his place looked. You halted right behind him, when he stopped in front of the door to unlock it using a touch-screen passcode lock. When he heard the small door beep a few times, he opened the door to let you in. “Excuse me…” you politely said as you entered the house.

Mother. Of. God.

And you thought the outside of his home was marvelous? Oh, no honey. That was just the cherry on top. The interior was on a whole other level.

It was wide in space. The floor was made out of smooth wooden mahogany planks. A simple wooden staircase stood on the side of the wall, that led all the way up towards the second floor with a steel railing following alongside it. The balcony of the second floor was completely see through, made out of tempered glass, one of the strongest glasses ever made. If you were to look below from the balcony, you could see almost everything from the top floor.

Further down from the front door, there was a lounge area. You would be greeted by a mini bar with high quality alcohol displayed in glass shelves behind the counter. Fancy glass cups were suspended above the counter, glittering spotlessly. Right next to the bar were two pool tables centered behind a big leather sofa surrounding a flat screen TV.

As you made your way past the lounge area, a long rectangular dining table with 12 seats surrounding it stood there in the dining area. A few meters away, was the kitchen. Everything was mostly covered in black and white. The counters. The high-tech stoves. Everything was sleek and clean.

After Gun gave you a tour in the first floor, he took your luggage for you then made you follow him up the stairs. The man was literally carrying your suitcase over his head like it was nothing, which impressed you. He did seem like a gentleman at first, but you couldn’t help but remember that he is still a very dangerous man.

On the second floor, he guided you into an empty room that didn’t seem to be touched at all but was still kept clean. There was a big queen-sized bed with a huge window next to it where you could view the scenery. However, the window was covered with dark curtains that could be pulled back anytime. There was a small wooden bedside table on both sides of the bed, with two lamps on top of them. Right near the door, was a slide-in closet. Across the room was a door that led you into a personal bathroom, which you find very convenient.

Gun set your luggage down next to the closet, then leaned against the wall while crossing his arms. “Alright, time to discuss what you’ll be doing for me while you’re here.”

You sat on the side of the bed, while you curiously stared at him wondering what he had planned for you.

“Tonight, I will work on the contract that I’ll be giving you later on. However, I’ll lay the rules out for you right now. While you are here, make sure you follow my rules, and MY rules alone. No one else’s. Since I have accepted you into my own house for the sake of making you stronger, consider yourself lucky. I wouldn’t have done this in the first place if I thought of you as a nobody, so don’t waste my time. I believe that you have what it takes to be one of the strongest, if you polish your skills the right way through my guidance. While living here temporarily, don’t be loud, don’t annoy me, and don’t cause any trouble. In addition to you staying here, you are not allowed to leave this place unless I give you permission to do so. There will be times when you will be fed breakfast, lunch, and dinner everyday, so make sure to be awake at those times or else you won’t be getting any meals at all. Make sure that you are ready when I get downstairs for your training sessions, which will always start at seven in the morning. Also, don’t let anyone into this house unless I inform you to do so. There will be times when I won’t be home, so even if they do say that they’re associated with me in any way, don’t let them in. And one last thing. Don’t touch anything that belongs to me, except for when you’re in the lounge area, when you’re in the dining room where food will be given to you, or anything else given to you by me. Lastly, don’t ever tell anyone about what happens in this house. Never tell anyone about what you’ve been doing and what our plans are. If you break any of these rules, always expect that there will be consequences. By tomorrow you will receive a physical copy of the contract from me once it has been finished. You’ll have to wait for it so it can be signed properly. Any questions?”

You yawned while nodding.

“Hmph. What is it then?”

“What if I get hungry during times when it’s not even breakfast, lunch, or dinner?”

“Then control your hunger.”

You pouted, while crossing your arms. “So I’ll just starve?”

“You’ll get used to it if you don’t rely on your appetite whenever you have a sudden urge to eat. It won’t be good if you eat regularly whenever you’re not hungry since it’s just going to ruin your appetite.”

“Oh okay. Oh and I have other questions. So, you already know right? The reason why I’m in Korea in the first place was to make money. How can I earn money in Korea if this will be my life temporarily? And why do you want to take me in so badly? Like what’s in it for me? You literally just forced me to be here.”

Gun smirked before closing the door behind him. “Wouldn’t you like to know ‘so badly’?”

Slowly, he made his way towards you in such a sly manner that he made you back up immediately into the bed even further. As he stood closely in front of you, he leaned in closer to you. Both of his arms now pinned onto either side of you on the bed, while trapping you in between his arms. You could feel almost feel his hot breath touch your skin, which smelled of nicotine. He took off his glasses revealing what lied underneath, and your eyes finally met his.

Underneath his glasses were pitch-black orbs with white pupils centered in between each eye. There was a huge scar that ran across his eyes, which must’ve hurt greatly from the looks of it. Stunned, you were left speechless. You couldn’t get a word to escape from your mouth as you stared up at him. It was like you were caught in some kind of spell. You were so drawn to his eyes that, unconsciously, your hand reached his face and touched his cheek. But with fast reflexes, it didn’t even take a few seconds until he grabbed onto your hand then pinned it over your head. Your other hand laid dead still and you felt that hand starting to sweat onto the bed. His right knee was also pinned in between your legs, trapping you under his body.

“What are you trying to do now? Seduce me?”

You quickly shook your head in response.

“You know, I’m starting to think that bringing over a stranger might be bad for me, so listen closely.”

He leaned in very close to your ear, that the side of your heads were parallel from each other. Your heart started beating quicker and quicker every minute that you think that even Gun could hear it from where his face was at. He tucked a few strands of your hair behind your ear for you to listen carefully.

This position…

His forearms were pinned on the sides of your head. His scent made you feel light-headed. His chest was barely touching yours and you felt his breath even closer to your ear that it made your body tingle all over. You could even feel his leg graze slightly against your private part in between your legs, which made your legs all stiff. This was the first time that you’re on a bed with a man that it made your cheeks hot and red like twin tomatoes.

“Think of it as kind of a. . . You-Pay-Me and I-Pay-You situation. The outcome will be Win-Win if we both cooperate with each other. You will help me bring down four of the major power groups in Korea. In exchange, I will grant you anything you want. It can be money, fame, designer clothes, you name it. I’ll turn you into an unstoppable beast. You will even be known as a legend in Korea too.”

“I don’t really care much about all of that, except for the money. But… how will that benefit you?”

He stared deep into your eyes then smirked. “Money and power is all it takes to become the strongest. Once I have destroyed them all, there won’t be anything left for them in which I will be the one to rise to the top. I will shape you into one who’s worthy of fighting. My ultimate secret weapon. They won’t even know what will hit them. Once you have become one of my greatest masterpieces, money won’t be a problem for you anymore.”

Again with the “greatest masterpieces”. Will this really be the best option to help out mom?

“If that’s the case, then you can count me in. I’ll become one of your greatest masterpieces.”

“Finally, then it’s been decided. I’m glad we see eye-to-eye. We’ll negotiate on how much you’ll be given each month tomorrow after our first training session.”

He leaned back and retreated from the bed, leaving you to stare up at the ceiling in a daze. He retrieved his glasses then put them back on. While making his way towards the door, he stopped in front of it while he grasped the door knob.

“Oh, and one more thing. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask. I’ll mostly be in my room, so knock if you need to. Also, give me your phone for a second. I need to give you my number.” He let go of the door knob as he returned back to you.

“Ohhh… right.”

You quickly sat up from the bed then took out your phone from your pocket. You unlocked it before handing it to him, so he could add his number to your contacts. “I’ll need your number too.”

“Ah… alright.”

After the both of you exchanged numbers he said, “Contact me if there’s an emergency.” You nodded when he handed your phone back to you.

Right when he was about to leave the room, the last words he said to you that night was, “Go ahead and get some sleep. It’ll be a busy day for you tomorrow.” Then shuts the door behind him.

Exhausted from everything that has happened that day, you collapsed back onto the bed and sighed.

Ah, I’m such a fool.

Out of nowhere, your belly started grumbling. You forgot that you haven’t eaten anything yet since you arrived in Korea. You sat up once again, then stared at your phone in your hand.

“Is hunger considered an emergency…?”

[End of Ch. I]

[comicaurora]

I heard you mention Kekkai Sensen/Nightow on the Guess that Tune stream and since I’m currently in the throes of a Trigun addiction, I wanted to know if you’ve seen Trigun (98 or Stampede), and if so, what are your thoughts on it?

Also is Kekkai Sensen good? all I know about it os that its ending song SLAPS

Yea, you know, that one manga with the dopey-looking goofball protagonist who's actually concealing untold eldritch power he can't really control that hurts him when he overuses it, who grapples with intense guilt over his role in being passively complicit with something terrible that happened to a woman he loves even though she doesn't hold it against him and in fact made an active self-sacrifice to protect him, and now he hangs out with a crew of extremely cool people even though he's basically non-combat, and they all live in a world that's built a workable life and civilization out of the remnants of a literal apocalyptic nightmare event. That one manga by that one guy. Fun stuff!

I think at this point I've finished every form of Trigun media, although I read through the manga a while back and don't remember a lot of the details. I like it a lot! I really respect any story that unpacks the true depth and difficulty of being a pacifistic hero, and how it can take more strength and sacrifice to not hurt people. I think I liked Stampede a lot, although it took me a few rants to come to that conclusion.

I watched the first season of Kekkai Sensen and liked it, but I honestly couldn't tell you much about why. I just had a nice time with it, I really liked the protagonist's whole Vibe and the character designs were top notch. I'm also a sucker for urban fantasy in general, so "New York experienced a lovecraftian apocalypse and everybody just kinda Deals With It" was perfect for me. Also I was so used to "anime character has their eyes always shut" that I legitimately didn't clock that anything was weird about the protagonist's eyes until he busted out his Crazy Powers - I even had a false memory that he'd opened them earlier and they were normal, it's just such an invisible trope. I thought that was cute!

[raincandyyy-u]

Ceroba’s Flaws pt. 1 (revised)

(slight uty pacifist spoilers)

(before i even start this i’d like to clarify two things, 1: i don’t ship staroba. i don’t think that ceroba was obligated to date starlo AT ALL especially considering that starlo doesn’t even confess to ceroba. 2: i understand that ceroba is grieving over chujin at this point and it’s the reason why she treats starlo and everyone else distantly, especially considering she knows that continuing chujin’s plan was hurting her. hence the “don’t you think i know how far gone I am!?” line in her pre-fight dialogue.)

Ceroba doesn’t really try to understand the reason WHY starlo is doing all the Wild East stuff and why he always has his North Star persona on. And now, obviously, Ceroba is dealing with her own problems especially by the time that Clover falls into the underground. But Ceroba and Starlo are best friends; plus the fact that Starlo was the only friend that Ceroba had after Chujin and Kanako died. So why doesn’t she try to understand Starlo? She tries to hide her annoyances with Starlo sometimes to spare his feelings, but doesn’t most of the time. She kinda treats Star like a little brother who needs to be babysat. “What the hell are you doing?” “I apologize for Star’s antics.”

(And now, I also have to address that Starlo is reckless and immature. It’s the reason why the Feisty Five breaks up in Pacifist and the reason why Starlo fights Clover. It’s his whole character arc. I’ll probably end up making a post about Starlo’s immaturity at some point too, cause I do have grievances with him as well.)

Starlo also mentions that he tried to help Ceroba out using the wild east’s distracting capabilities (i don’t exactly remember the quote but it was something like “I tried to help her take her mind off things. Aren’t distractions what’s best for that?”) but Ceroba doesn’t seem to notice Star’s efforts.

Ceroba mentions in the steamworks that she once considered dating Starlo when she was younger but chalks it up to her being young and naive. “Well, perhaps at one point I considered it.” “Back when I was young and naive, kind of like you.” “Hey, it’s science. Your brain is still developing.” her reasoning for not pursuing starlo being “I wanted to grow up and.. Star didn’t follow.” JEEZ ceroba, you didn’t have to be that cold 😭😭

i’d also like to add on my grievances with Ceroba and Clover. Starlo points out in Pacifist that “When I fought Clover, I was ‘reckless.’ But when YOU want their soul, it’s ‘for the greater good?’”, to which Ceroba replies saying that she already knows how far gone she is, but I still think that Starlo’s point stands. Yeah, In Starlo’s encounter with Clover he was in fact being reckless, due to him not being right in the head at that time. And yeah, you could also say that Ceroba wasn’t right in the head either during her pacifist fight (to which i agree). But the problem is that Ceroba keeps trying to justify her attacking Clover because it’s “for the greater good” and “for the future of monster kind��� when in fact, she was being as reckless as Starlo was.

[christian-oc-tournament]

Elysia Autumnbrook propaganda!!

I never realized it before but come to think of it, her story is all about redemption. Elysia Autumnbrook (nicknamed "Junebug" by her father, because her birthday is June 1st) is the second oldest among her several siblings. Growing up, she was always a kind and curious girl, but not without her fair share of mischief. (Thank her best friend Domitius for being a bad influence on her, lmbooo) Though she never had ill intent, this did lead to serious trouble a couple of times. With this and her love of animals combined, she set her sights on becoming a Tamer, one of the most respected and noble positions in her whole village. She felt the need to make up for her wrongdoings, and more so, she wanted to be someone her family could look up to and be proud of.

In the peaceful, pacifistic village of Mapleshire, it is absolutely forbidden to take a life, especially an innocent one. This includes the lives of animals. Being nestled deep in a forest though, it isn't unheard of for wild animals to pose a threat. Thus, to protect the people, the role of a Tamer is to deal with the animal nonviolently. They do this with their magical instruments, which they are trained to use, to enchant the animal and send it away.

But one fateful day, when Elysia was still a young trainee Tamer, a wolf attacked the village's shepherds and their flocks. She was the first one to reach them and tried to tame the wolf, but failed. In a panic she fought with it, and ultimately killed it. There was no hiding what she'd done, and when word reached the Ram and his Bighorns (the leaders of Mapleshire) of what had happened, they banished her. They branded her forehead with the mark of Pluto, so that anyone that met her would know of her sin and the danger she is.

She spent long, horrible, lonely years trying to survive, all on her own. She grew distrustful, unable and unwilling to rely on anyone, or even speak to anyone if she could help it. (That is, until she got roped into the d&d plot she was made for lol) She wears the skull of the wolf she killed to hide her face, her shame, and in some ways, as a self-punishment. It wasn't until Domitius finally found her and convinced her to come back to Mapleshire to save her family from a new danger (a long story for another day), and she found that her family still loved and long forgave her for what happened, that she finally left the skull behind.

Sorry this is really long, I love her lol 👉👈 You can find plenty more art of her here, but be warned - all of it's old and lots of it is angsty/bloody :p But please vote for my beloved girl!! <3

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[radio-wavelengths2]

I literally just remembered one of the ones I sent that got deleted. Not word for word but here's the whole thing:

Do you remember a little while back when u sent those pet play asks? The one with the really god bot and the really bad one humvee was training. I faintly remember something about the bad pet wanting to submit but struggling really hard. Let's expand on that, but instead of pet play it's brat taming flavored.

A really rude, abrasive bot with a tendency to blow up over little things gets tamed into the sweetest little thing by humvee. Maybe not a pacifist, but more likely to control their anger and speak politely to people. How did humvee do it? Well, it started when he noticed that this bot seemed really frustrated with themselves every time they got into an argument. He sees them struggling so hard to pull themselves out of it, and he can see a tinge of sexual frustration behind it all. Humvee, seeing the perfectly well-behaved sub under all the aggression, gets to work immediately.

He has to tie them down, not just as a sexy thing, but genuinely for their own safety and to help them slip into the right mind set. He probably gags them, he can deal with the vulgar language and sarcasm later, it's all about establishing a dynamic for the first few nights they spend together. When they try to forcefully get what they want despite the bonds, he pulls away. He doesn't even attempt building them up until they calm down. Attempts to yell despite the gag will result in delayed overloads. Only when they're holding still and whimpering prettily do they get to climax.

Then, he ups the anti. Just their hands are tied during full sessions, and the gag is lost. Misbehaving will result in more and more time spend being edged, and any aggression gets a physical reprimand like pinching their node or gripping their spike a bit too hard. This is where he starts mixing in demands with his already established expectations. Swift, eager, and mostly correct attempts to comply will get them several back to back overloads.

Then, he extends this outside of the bedroom. Any misbehaving in public gets them spanked. If he complies with demands, a vibrater attached to their spike and/or node will go off. It'll be a shock if they don't. They aren't allowed to touch themselves until humvee is ready to dish out another lesson. Eventually, this slow and stead approach wears them down into a more complaint, happier mechanism who gets into fewer fights. They seek rewards activity, and even admit to misbehaving willingly knowing it'll be a punishment because they know it's what's expected of them. Turning the bot from the worst brat cybertron had ever seen, into the perfect little sub, humvee has once again saved the day.

I LOVE THIS SO SO MUCH I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THAT OLD ASK

And ough,,, if only he could do this with Noxious. Sure he turns that bot from a "top" to a full sub but he's still a selfish, annoying asshole. I think this kind of training would be perfect to fix his attitude and make everyone like him more

And, if he continues his good behavior, Humvee might just call in his team and let them all have a go at this perfect little sub

[bonetrousled]

please please please please gawd tell me more about ur pap being the knight theory OR if u would so pls direct me to where u talked abt it before. u have truly GRIPPED me w this

OH GOD I HAVE SO SO MUCH OK. so i DO have the papyrus powerpoint HERE which has a section on that a little more in-depth and i will say i am not the first to come up w this idea but personally it's the only option that makes Complete sense w no holes to me. this is all going off the concept that papyrus is likely younger here bc sans asks kris to hang out w him. my ramblings under a cut bc im about to go fucking CRAZY

the knight, by people that have seen him already, is always referred to w he/it pronouns. papyrus and sans are the only characters that fit the he/it bill (both of them are referred to with it/its in the lost soul fight, nobody else is referred to this way)

there is NO way that kris OR susie could have made the dark worlds in chapter 1 and chapter 2. the dark world had to have been opened AFTER noelle and berdly got to the library (since their books and stuff are open) but BEFORE kris and susie arrived, crossing all of them off potential dark world opener lists. also up until this point kris didn't even Know how to open a dark world

there's the closet in the library that states that "a very large person could easily fit inside". papyrus could have potentially been hiding in there and waiting for others to come to open the fountain. additionally in ut he says that there's no skeletons in his closet- except him sometimes

but then the question of motive comes up. Why would he do that?

so far from what we've seen in deltarune, papyrus is an asocial shut-in. given that the main core of other characters hasn't really been altered, we can also assume what he wants MOST is to feel important and be liked, like in undertale. combining these two aspects leads us to someone who can't bring himself to socialize with others in the real world, but DESPERATELY wants to feel necessary and admired.

the whole deal w the dark world is wish fulfillment, at least as i see it. susie gets a cool outfit with spikes and makes friends, she has her own room with her own style, etc. berdly gets a cool, nerdy sci-fi outfit and is put in charge, and even gets to have a heroic moment towards the end of chapter 2. noelle gets to tell her true feelings to a mother figure and gets to spend time with susie. so if you get what you want most in the dark world, it would make COMPLETE sense for papyrus to not only be spending time in them, but opening more fountains to spend as much time in them as possible.

plus, what have we seen the first two chapters thus far? EVERYONE important and in-charge LOVES the knight. all they do is talk abt him and how awesome he is. double tying in this aspect of wish fulfillment to the weird, perfect nature of hometown- people who didn't really get a chance at life are still alive, everyone is happy, that sort of thing. papyrus is the ONLY main character out of all of undertale that NEVER gets what he wants. every other character gets some sort of completion to their arc, some sort of resolution and closure, they meet their goals, they achieve something. by the end of true pacifist, papyrus doesn't get ANYTHING. his friend count is still stagnant, he never proves himself, or gets any sort of important role (he only becomes the ambassador if you DON'T want to). putting two and two together here, it would make perfect sense for papyrus to finally get his moment- by his own hands.

plus, and this is just a little obvious here, but if you become what you want the most in the dark world, and papyrus wanted to be in the guard- what would you call a member of a royal guard? a knight.

alongside the weird, vague hints that papyrus must have had SOMETHING happen to him in his past and that he wasn't always a great guy (very adamant about how people can change, the "I'M A PRETTY BRUTAL KIND OF GUY" line, the way he admits to you in aborted no mercy that he was going to blast you to smithereens) and we NEVER get resolution/explanation for that (or any of the other weird shit he says [see powerpoint]) i feel like there's just too much setup here for any other option to make sense to me. papyrus is also just very obviously toby's favorite character from ut, he's the only one he ever commissioned art for just to have and he clearly really enjoys writing him and doing stuff w him. anyway ummm im insane :) *grins*

[andreabandrea]

i really love post-game headcanons where frisk refers to flowey, either jokingly or seriously, as their best friend. their dynamic is so interesting to me, like. flowey feels like anyone who sees him and knows his secret will only want to have asriel back, but frisk never knew asriel. on the other hand, they know flowey - and flowey is the only other one who knows what it's like to save and reset.

and that gives frisk a connection that they don't have with the rest of their friends and family. even though in the true pacifist ending, things are all fine and dandy now, there could very easily still be trauma of like - every monster trying to and succeeding in killing them (except papyrus, who just beats them near unconscious and throws them in a shed). and if they did any neutral routes, they might have killed also, and nobody knows about it or remembers it except them. even despite killing and being killed, just the trauma of resetting and being forgotten and starting over several times could weigh on a person - granted, frisk is a very determined person, but still.

i think the concept that frisk doesnt want to change flowey, but instead meet him where he is, would be intriguing to flowey - and in some circumstances, i could see that being enough to convince him to come to the surface - and this has always been more interesting to me than "saving asriel"-type endings. some things can't be taken back. trauma can't be erased - but you can still move forward with your loved ones by your side.

i think frisk and flowey would help each other heal. frisk initially tried to run away from the surface for a reason, and maybe not a good reason - asriel implies maybe they were trying to end their life by climbing a mountain nobody returns from. flowey has a whole load of trauma that i surely don't need to elaborate on - but i will anyway.

a lot of flowey mischaracterizations stem from the reader taking his words at face value. in new home in the no mercy run, flowey expresses that he's emotionless and nothing but a heartless killer. a lot of fics tend to write flowey as nothing but a perfect calculating killing machine because the readers believe him. but his actions tell a different story; flowey loses his patience with the whole "i'm here to teach you about love" act if you dodge his bullets three times - it's childish, in a way, because he is a child and he's mad that he's not winning at this game. flowey clearly expresses sadness, anger, and in the no mercy route just a bit after new home - fear. (the way i've written it in the past is that he's constantly disassociating from himself and the world by portraying his death and trauma as part of a game, and the way he deals with emotions is filtered through this ptsd-like view, but i dont want to act like i'm the best flowey writer in the world or anything, i've also made a lot of mistakes).

regardless, flowey is, at the end of the day, also a child like frisk. he wants to seem scary to them, and in the no mercy run, he's trying to sound cool and appeal to "chara" - that's why he acts the way he does. it's like a child trying to scare another child or act tough for a beloved sibling.

flowey has also done terrible things to frisk; they're not exempt from the list of monsters that tried to and succeeded in killing them. and although i think all the other monsters can and would be helpful and healing toward frisk and flowey, there's something valuable about a bond like - "we went through this together." if frisk can forgive someone like asgore who succeeded in killing 6 humans, killed them a handful of times, and also made them kill him, i think frisk can forgive flowey.

this comes down more to headcanon, but i think the way that frisk and flowey would interact in this post-game scenario is that, like. flowey would never admit weakness directly. he would feign disinterest in the surface and its denizens, but only because he's afraid. afraid that people wouldn't want him around. afraid because he doesn't know what happens next and if he deserves to see it. afraid of what he could do. but if he, soulless that he is, ever did try to do anything harmful, frisk is the one person who could easily stop him. (not that they would have to - flowey only killed out of boredom, not out of a real enjoyment of it; with so much to do on the surface, and no reset as a failsafe, i can't imagine flowey starting to kill again).

i think frisk would be able to read between the lines about when flowey is hurt and upset and try to comfort him without making him feel weak. we see frisk's kindness and mercy scare and upset flowey once (post-photoshop flowey fight), but those aren't normal circumstances - flowey hadn't grown as much then as he has by the end of the true pacifist route. i think, with time, flowey could come to accept he deserves to exist as he is and accept kindness, and show it in his own way

without the ability to reset (barring the true reset), anything that happens from now on is permanent. flowey in the game relies heavily on his knowledge of past resets; without that, he's forced to admit (albeit if only to himself) that he's not as smart and powerful as he likes to claim. it's a scary new world, and the future isn't written, but i think flowey would be willing to face it again with frisk - someone he always wished he had as a friend.

[redbuddi]

How will you handle the characterization of characters like Sam and Tucker? Danni?

What are some of the biggest changes to the overall story you are looking forward to exploring?

*cracks knuckles* alright here we go!

Sam and Tucker are extremely important to the series, more important than I think people tend to give them credit for, and that importance would be retained in Redux.

Tucker would be more or less the same as the OG Tuck, he's still a big tech geek, still loves meat, is still simultaneously the comic relief and the voice of reason depending on the situation, etc. I mostly plan on just making a few subtle tweaks to his character to flesh him out a bit more than the show was willing to.

Now is the time to mention that Redux will take place the same year the OG show came out, 2004. So the tech that Tucker salivates over will be tech that's dated by our standards, he still uses a PDA like a cell-phone, and carries around a lot of big chunky gadgets like portable CD players and such. While he is mostly a programming guy, he will build and invent things, and will help Danny do the same. He invented Danny's goggles and co-invented the Thermos with Danny.

Tucker is the most emotionally available of the trio, he doesn't always have solutions but he's willing to hear people out, and with his weak constitution he is the least fond of fighting, tho not purely pacifistic. He is the most outgoing of the group as well, but doesn't desire popularity, he's pretty satisfied with his lot in life. He's just a pretty amicable guy and likes to talk a lot. Like in the show, he's been friends with Danny for the longest, and knows him the best.

"Time to hack the mainframe..."

*swats away computer*

"Hello! This is the front desk, right? Sorry, I'm new and no one's told me the company password yet..."

I'd also take out his more wannabe-casanova traits, cause it's just kind of uncomfortable. I see him as more of a jughead-type, commenting on the drama and romance from the sidelines while never himself being too interested in it. He'll still joke about ladies loving him, but it'd be more tongue-in-cheek and self-aware.

Overall he tends to try to outsmart or talk his way out of situations, which can be a huge help, but also sometimes makes things worse. His smooth-talking has a 50/50 success rate.

He has a pretty good relationship with his parents, but can be kind of distant with his Dad, who is pretty overbearing and really wants Tucker to follow in his footsteps as the Mayor. It would be a running joke that Tucker is so disinterested in being the Mayor that he often times doesn't even justify his dad with a response. He will literally just leave if he can tell that that's where a conversation is going.

Sam is probably the character that would be overhauled the most. The OG Sam isn't terrible, but is very obviously an attempt at a counter-cultural character by people who know nothing about counter-culture.

The biggest change I'd make is that she no longer comes from old money. I get what the OG show was trying to do, but even as a little kid I couldn't really buy it or her whole rebellious thing. Not when she still greatly benefited from her family's money.

Instead, she comes from a well-off upper middle-class house, and she hates her parents. Not just because they don't understand her, but because her parents are actually horrible. Her Dad is a lawyer who is always looking for loopholes to get the rich out of trouble, and her Mom runs an MLM selling cheap clothes to desperate housewives (Think LuLaRoe). Her parents don't not love her, but they are deeply terrible people who, at the end of the day, only really care about themselves. Sam has sworn to do everything in her power to not be like them. The only reason she hasn't run away is because they're not home often enough for her to have to deal with them too much.

Danny: "Ow! Watch where you're poking!"

She tries to do as much on her own as she can, up to and including making basically everything she wears out of discount clothes and thrift shop purchases. While she does get an allowance, she doesn't spend any of it, she's saving her money so that she can leave home the moment she turns 18 and never look back. She is more interested in fashion than she often lets on, and dreams of running an eco-friendly fair trade boutique. After destroying capitalism, of course. She designed and made the alterations to Danny's jumpsuit, with the help of spectral thread that Danny had invented for her birthday.

In this series, Sam isn't just a holier-than-thou goth girl, she's a full-on anarchist punk-rock bitch, and she's proud of it. She will always speak her mind when she feels an injustice is taking place, and unlike in the OG series, Danny and Tucker will usually be there to back her up. That said, there's plenty that she gets up to on her own, she has had her brushes with the law, she's gotten into fights, she does not protest peacefully, and she usually doesn't involve Danny or Tucker because she doesn't want them to feel obligated to help her and then get hurt because of it.

She is strongly antisocial, and generally pretty closed off. She is the type of person who will listen to everyone's problems but won't speak about her own unless pushed. She is deeply loyal to and protective of her friends, sometimes to the point of being a little overbearing.

As for Danni, I certainly have thoughts, but I haven't settled completely on how she would fit in to the overall story. I do want her to be in the series, I just need to figure out what her deal would be.

EDIT! Completely forgot to answer the second part of the question!

The biggest change I'm looking forward to is giving Valerie more screen time, haha.

[smolstarthief]

Another Maruki analysis: His literal Mask

I kinda wanted to do an analysis on his literal mask since this was a realization that hit me really. Now I agree that it looks absolutely silly and I wonder what Atlus was thinking with his overall outfit but... I can't help but think of something here...

Now "Masks," both literally and figuratively, play a primary role in P5 in regards to its characters. They hide who they really are because of either pressure to meet societal expectations, fear (Ex: rejection), dealing with various forms of abuse, and of course trauma. Especially as way of coping with said trauma. It is also a thing in Psychology known as, "masking" which is basically the description I just gave. Masking is basically, as an example, someone performing in a way that it is considered, "acceptable." But it can be at the expense of expressing who they really are, hiding their true selves. It's never fun at all as someone who deals with this on occasion and can even hurt the individual deep down. It can even worsen their mental state as well.

I always feel bad for those that had to go through it for one reason or another. But back on topic. When the MCs awaken their Personas, they literally tear their own masks off (with an exception or two). It's framed as painful but then liberating. They feel free and are done with all the bs they had to deal with. Each mask also has a unique design for every Thief and it's all unique to them and even symbolic of either their true selves or even just overall personality.

So, what about Maruki? While it does look ridiculous... As I've mentioned in a previous post, it almost resembles a shield. A large one at that. Now you could argue Makoto's does as well but it's short and is more like a knight. It also reflects her more tough personality. In Maruki's case though... It covers his whole head and top part of his face (minus his eyes 'cause he needs to see somehow). I also mentioned that it's ironic that "Throw Away Your Mask" is basically his thought process and mental state and yet he is hiding behind his own mask.

Now the "shield" thing can be a double meaning: He doesn't want to hurt the Thieves at all and can be considered a pacifist unless pushed and even while fighting he tries to reason with them and mostly uses Azathoth/Adam. But at the same time, it can also be his own mental defenses coming to the surface. He's hiding behind a metaphorical shield and running away from everything. The truth, his true feelings, his trauma, everything. He gives a calm and serene/gentle demeanor ("Gentle Madman") which is genuine but also puts up his defenses. Even when everything around him is falling apart, he refuses to believe that "his way" was ultimately wrong and harmful even when he knows or realizes it.

Then it gets damaged, and Adam is destroyed which is when he starts to fully break. His barrier is falling apart. He starts to show more of how he really feels. He has awareness and is regaining it at the same time and the cracks remain.

Then he fully removes it and later his godhood outfit changes to his white attire albeit torn up, damaged, and dirty. He's completely vulnerable. No barriers... No mask.

He's not hiding anymore, and we see who he really is: A sad, traumatized, and broken man who gave up everything for a dream that was ultimately not gonna help anyone... Not even himself. He wanted to do good so badly but went too far and about nearly lost himself in the process. It was unhealthy and self-destructive... Like the story of Icarus, hubris got the better of him and flew too close to the sun. All because of things that were out of his control and led to him making impulsive and downright harmful decisions. It's being human and understandable. But he still needed to be stopped, otherwise... Things will turn out for the worse for everyone, including him. Now I wonder what other character this can remind people of...?

So, joking and small fandom jab aside, a TL;DR version: Maruki's mask can represent a barrier he put up for himself to hide and run from it all and once it cracks and it's fully taken off, he shows his true feelings, coming to terms with himself and the truth. It's only then he starts to take steps towards healing and starting over on his own two feet. No hiding, no mask, no barrier. Just him and whatever reality will throw at him, and he'll try his damndest to get better and even redeem himself.