#and i really really want to have at least one nativity scene available at the christmas market so im trying really hard not to fuck this up

[mystichistoria]

Still painting

[from-a-legends-pov]

Star Wars Legends Highlight of the Week: Dorset Guards the Fake Falcon

In this feature, a fan will share one thing they love from Star Wars Legends — a book, a comic, an author, a character, a scene, an event, or anything else they want to highlight — and tell us more about it.

If you, too, love Legends, follow @from-a-legends-pov and check out our From a Legends Point of View fanfiction event, where we’ll be bringing together writers (maybe you?) to build a collection of Star Wars Legends fanfiction set during the time of the Original Trilogy. Writer signups are open through June 2 — use our Signup Form to pitch your story concepts (Signup Guidelines available here), and please encourage your favorite writers to participate!

Today’s Legends highlight is a scene from Aaron Allston’s novel X-Wing: Solo Command in which Polearm Squadron pilot Dorset Konnair is guarding the Millennium Falsehood in battle (after working with the Falsehood to mimic a YT-2400 freighter), and we’re talking with WraithFourteen.

Tell us about your Legends highlight. What is it? What’s it about?

My highlight involves a scene in X-Wing: Solo Command where Wedge and other characters are flying a fake Millennium Falcon as bait to lure forces of the main villain, Warlord Zsinj. There’s several notable elements, including a protocol droid wearing a Han Solo mask and clothes because Wedge can’t speak the Wookiee language to Chewie, but my focus is on the single fighter assigned to guard the fake Falcon (called the Millennium Falsehood) here - and how baiting the enemy in this case meant taking on two full squadrons of TIE Interceptors.

What makes this a highlight for you? What do you love about it?

This scene stands out for a few reasons, but especially because it involves Dorset Konnair, a more minor character from the Wraith Squadron trilogy, flying an A-Wing to escort the Falsehood. Dorset was in just three scenes before this — two in Wraith Squadron flying with Kell Tainer, and one in this book depicting her a small, quiet woman with a star-flare tattoo around her right eye and others that are unspecified but also varying shades of blue.

During this scene, Dorset logs at least two kills and outflies the other enemy pilots despite their numbers. Since Rogue Squadron ace Tycho Celchu previously flew an X-Wing in the Falsehood escort role, it’s also subtly impressive that Dorset was selected in the first place. This implies to me that Dorset is a capable minor character who doesn’t brag about it, sort of like Wedge was in the OT movies.

Fellow pilot Myn Donos had interpreted her quiet nature to be a sign she felt out of place as a native of Coruscant, the former Imperial capital. That and her tattoos created a bit of mystery around her even when I first read the novel as a kid.

Do you have a favorite detail or moment?

Going back to the bit where Dorset’s A-Wing detaches from the YT-1300, it reminded me, even when I first read the book, of how small planes would be dropped from a larger one in the late 1940s through mid-1960s. That was mostly done with test planes (like the first supersonic flight depicted in The Right Stuff) but also attempted unsuccessfully with a tiny fighter jet. It helped that I’d seen both that tiny jet and the larger plane that carried it at a museum as a kid.

The YT-2400 shell being dropped away as well also reminded me of how the Apollo program’s rocket had lower sections and rings that were detached along the way to the Moon - an image of that inspired how I envisioned the book scene. (As you’ve probably noticed, I was really into stories of air/space exploration as a kid, and so the pilots were what drew me into Star Wars. I also had a hand-drawn image of the first supersonic plane being released on my wall as a kid, similar to the “you can’t look dignified when you’re having fun” OP.)

To learn more…

If you’d like to read more about Dorset and the Millennium Falsehood, check out X-Wing: Solo Command at your library or favorite bookstore, or read the entry on Dorset Konnair or the Millennium Falsehood on Wookieepedia.

And be sure to check out @from-a-legends-pov and our From a Legends Point of View fanfiction event. Writer signups are now open — access the Signup Form (step-by-step Signup Guidelines available here) as well as our Event Overview and FAQ.

[fancoloredglasses]

Ewoks: the Battle for Endor (Space diabeedus)

(Thanks to Video Detective)

[All images owned by 20th Century Fox Disney and Lucasfilm Disney. Please don’t sue me]

This is the second of the “Ewok” TV movies. The first was Mace’s “coming-of-age” (or at least “learning not to be a prick”) film. This one, for reasons you’ll soon learn, was very much Cindel’s story. This one did not have Burl Ives explaining what is going on, because in the time between The Ewok Adventure and this film, Wicket has apparently learned English Galactic Common (which is why I said these movies must take place after Return of the Jedi)

If you would like to watch the film, it’s available on Disney+.

We open to discover that the family have repaired their cruiser and will be leaving Endor soon. Cindel tries to explain the concept of “good-bye” to Wicket, to which Wicket decides “Good-bye not good”. I can’t really argue with that logic.

While the pair head to the Ewok village, Wicket sees and smells smoke. They arrive to see...

...the village ablaze and strange humanoids capturing the Ewoks! What’s more, Cindel’s life monitor winks out on the area showing her mother (meaning she’s dying) She rushes to the hut to where the family is staying to see Mace with his blaster out, warning Cindel to run. She does so, but...

...HOLY SHIT this got dark really quick for a kids’ movie!

With Mace and Catarine dead (and Wicket captured) Cindel rushes to Jeremitt. However...

...the raiders’ leader (Terak) has decided he wants the power core of the cruiser (or as he calls it “the Power”) and tears apart the cruiser to find it. Once Jermitt sees Cindel approaching, he fights back and flees, getting a glancing blow from a blaster. With Jeremitt and Cindel fleeing the scene, Terak’s pet witch Charal plays with the ring on her finger, transforming into a raven-like creature and flying after them.

[OK, gonna stop right here for a moment. First, where was Terak and his raiders during Jedi? I’m assuming they’re native to Endor as (with the exception of Charal) they dress very primitively. However, they speak English Galactic Common. I would mention the high-tech firearms they carry, but that could easily be written off to raiding the Imperial outpost for anything the Alliance New Republic left behind. Also, magic doesn’t exist in the Star Wars universe (unless you count the Force) None of this seems to fit in with what we know from Jedi.]

While hiding from Terak’s raiders, Jeremitt tells Cindel to find the Ewoks and stay with them while he provides a distraction. I’m pretty sure you can guess what happens next.

With her family killed, Cindel runs as fast as her little legs can carry her. However, Charal flies to her and transforms back to normal.

“There’s no escape for you, my little one.”

Charal takes Cindel back to Tarak and some pretty badly rendered stop-motion beasts towing cages full of Ewoks. (Industrial Light & Magic they ain’t...

...well, okay then...)

Somehow Cindel winds up in a cage with Wicket as the beasts jerkily move out.

Wicket does his best to raise Cindel’s spirits by reminding her the Ewoks will look after her, starting with getting out of the cage. The Ewoks manage to pry a loose board from the bottom of the cage, but most of the Ewoks are too large for the gap...except Wicket (and Cindel, but she’s not an Ewok) HOW CONVENIENT! Also convenient that the raiders are too dumb to notice a human and an Ewok scurrying from under a prison cart.

Unfortunately, one has a flash of observation and notices, taking one of his fellow raiders to chase down the escapees.

Fortunately, they aim about as well as your average Stormtrooper. Wicket spies a nearby crag (wonder if it’s the same one his siblings were stuck on in the last movie?) and climbs it with Cindel (why would you go to a point that you can be cornered? I mean, that’s horror movie survival 101!)

(Thanks to Creagan Dow)

Sure enough, the goons scale after them, firing their blasters as they go. Wicket finds a small cave for then to hide in as the blaster fire causes a rockslide...

...with predictable (if badly greenscreened) results. Unfortunately, the cave mouth is now blocked. However, Wicket is confident there’s another entrance somewhere, so off they go deeper into the crag.

Sure enough, Wicket finds another entrance, but it’s awfully high up. However, Wicket conveniently finds some bones and tanned skins. Remembering the last movie, he makes...

...a skin glider!  He just needs one final piece to support the frame. He finds the prefect bone and goes to pick it up, but...

...another badly animated creature wasn’t done with it. At least that explains the bones, but what about the tanned hides? The creature jerkily chases Wicket back to camp. Wicket tries to fight it off but...

...it grabs Cindel and jerkily flies away. Well, no time like the present for the maiden voyage of the skin glider! Fortunately, Wicket managed to do a passable job of construction. Wicket manages to overtake the creature (that must be some tailwind!) and drops a rock on it, causing it to drop Cindel (what did he think was gonna happen?)! Wicket dives and gets under her, catching her with the top of the glider. Unfortunately...

That’s gonna affect the glider’s aerodynamics. Wicket manages to safely crash on the forest floor out of sight of the creature. Of course, now neither of them have any idea where they are. Wicket finds a hidey-hole to camp for the evening.

 The next morning, Wicket awakens to discover...

...a furry sneak-thief going through his pouches. The creature runs off (almost faster than we can see) far enough to taunt Wicket, but Wicket eventually catches him. However, Cindel wakes up and tries to befriend the creature.

The creature (Teek) agrees and takes them to...

Given the size, I kinda doubt Teek built this.

The three enter as Cindel and Wicket begin exploring. The place is so filled with debris you’d think Fred Sanford lived there.

(Thanks to Classic TV Rewind)

Since the place seems to be abandoned (except Teek), Cindel suggest moving in.

Then the owner shows up.

If he looks familiar, then you’ve likely seem him on TV

(Thanks to TheClassicSports)

Yep, that’s Wilford Brimley, who most of you will know from “diabeedus” ads and the movie Cocoon.

Anyway, the man (Noa) yells at Teek for inviting them in and promptly throws Wicket and Cindel out. Noa then helps himself to the food Wicket prepared, but feels sorry for the pair and deliberately turns his back so Teek can sneak out and give food to the trespassers.

That evening, Wicket makes camp near Noa’s house since it’s at least free of danger (if not free of grumpiness) Wicket builds a fire to keep warm, but...

“What are you two little wood rats trying to do? Burn down the whole forest?” (I love the fact that Noa’s lines sound like how I would expect a space version of Wilford Brimley to talk)

After screaming at them, Noa invites them in for the night...with the condition that they head out in the morning (yeah right)

That night, Cindel wakes up and hears a commotion behind the front door. She gets up to see what’s the matter and finds...

Then she wakes up screaming from her nightmare. Noa immediately wakes up and comforts Cindel, letting her sleep next to him for the evening. Yeah, they ain’t going anywhere in the morning!

The next morning as Noa leaves to forage for the day, he and Wicket have a heart-to-heart that Cindel and Wicket need to find their way home, which Wicket takes to mean they need to rescue the Ewoks.

Meanwhile in a castle that even the Empire shouldn’t have missed when they commandeered Endor, Charal is trying to use her magic to activate the power core (note that it’s not hooked up to anything. She’s just waving her hands and chanting over it) You can imagine how well that’s going. Tarek is growing increasingly impatient with the lack of results, threatening to kill her if she can’t do it (typical Evil Overlord behavior. Maybe his second-best witch will do better?)

Tarek eventually suggests (under pain of death) tracking down Cindel, as she obviously knows the power core’s secrets.

Later when Noa returns home, he discovers Wicket and Cindel actually left (are you surprised? You pretty much threw em out!) After saying how much he didn’t want em around, Teek discovers he brought home two bedrolls (one the size of a human child and the other the size of an Ewok) Noa claims he made them for Teek, but no one’s buying it.

Then the “unwanted guests” return from their own foraging, and Noa just grumps at em (but doesn’t throw them out) After Cindel and Wicket make dinner, Noa tucks them in for the night (yeah, they ain’t going anywhere)

The next morning Noa lays the law down, saying Cindel and Wicket have to keep the house tidy while he’s gone (Why? It’s not like Noa kept the place tidy) As Noa wanders off, Cindel suggests following him to see where he goes.

Teek knows this is a bad idea

[Quick note: Teek’s facial expression doesn’t change throughout the entire film. Almost like the makeup people didn’t know how to make a working mask]

After following Noa through the forest, eventually they come to...

...a spaceship. While Wicket is wandering around the perimeter...

...he runs afoul of one of Noa’s traps to keep prying eyes away. Noa comes out and frees Wicket and tells his story.

On his first mission out of the Academy (was he a pilot for the Empire or the Old Republic? He doesn’t say), he and his co-pilot crashed on Endor (and the Empire didn’t find him when they initially scanned the moon?), damaging their power core. His co-pilot went off in search of replacement parts and never came back (I’ll admit that when I first saw the film I thought his co-pilot would be revealed to be Terak, who was driven mad in the wild)

Later that evening, Noa and Cindel share a Moment talking about Cindel’s family before everyone goes to bed. But outside...

Not entirely sure how Charal found Cindel. Probably deus ex magic.

The next morning, Cindel wakes up hearing Catarine’s voice and wanders out looking for her. Later Wicket wakes up to find Cindel gone. He tries to wake Noa up, but he’s fast asleep, so he gets desperate (in a bit of comical revenge from earlier in the film)

Catarine’s voice lures Cindel deeper into the forest (with Wicket and Noa in pursuit) It turns out Catarine’s voice is Charal in disguise. I can’t find a video clip of this scene (or really any clip from the film) so I’ll use a similar clip from another Star Wars-adjacent film to convey what happens next...

(Thanks to Curtis Jordan)

Noa and Wicket arrive just in time to see Charal ride off with Cindel.

So there are horses on Endor too? So many things Jedi forgot to mention!

Noa and Wicket race back to the house to prepare a rescue, with Noa dressing in what I’m assuming is his old uniform (since it’s not Stormtrooper armor or Imperial green, I’m assuming he was an Old Republic pilot) Noa and Wicket (with Teek zooming after) then head out (how does Noa know where Tarek’s lair is?) 

Later, Chanal returns to the castle and drags Cindel before Tarek, who demands Cindel release “the Power”. Of course Cindel has no clue what Tarek is talking about, so he orders Cindel put to death, as well as Chanal. Chanal tries to transform and escape...

...but Tarek takes the talisman that allows her to transform, then sends them both to the dungeons with the Ewoks.

Meanwhile, Wicket, Teek, and Noa have somehow found Tarek’s castle.

In the dungeon, Chanal tells Cindel that they encountered Noa’s co-pilot, who was looking for “the power of the stars” (a power source for the star cruiser) and was killed by Tarek for it.

Outside, the rescue party has reached the castle, but there’s a moat surrounding it (of course! Every good castle needs a moat, even it it’s nothing but a long drop) Wicket tries to swim across before Noa stops him and sticks a branch in the water, showing Wicket what would’ve happened.

...the ultimate in weight loss! They never show exactly what is in the moat, but it’s obviously hungry!

Instead, Noa has a grapple gun he fires at the ramparts. Once checking the grapple is secure, he sends Teek speedily shuffling up the line. Then Wicket makes his way up. However, a guard approaches before Noa can start his ascent (the guard makes slightly less noise than a landspeeder, allowing Teek and Wicket time to hide) Fortunately, before the guard can pick Noa off (or something sensible like sound an alarm)...

...Wicket ties the line to the guard and sends him over. The guard’s falling weight is enough to pull Noa (who was tied to the other end) up. I guess those guards are heavier than they look. At least whatever was living in the moat got a main course after the salad Noa fed it.

Once inside, they make their way to the dungeons to look for Cindel and the Ewoks. Just one problem...

...Terak’s audience chamber is in the way. Fortunately (?) Teek has an idea.

He steals the rags outfit of one of the goons, then everyone hides under it with Wicket being the face of this new recruit as they cross the chamber. When they reach the chamber, they see two guards being very alert and attentive...

...to their card game. Teek rushes over to steal the keys, but the guard adjusts himself, sitting on Teek’s hand. Teek snags the keys, but is still trapped, so he slides a card up the guard’s sleeve. Inevitably, it falls out, making it look like he’s cheating.

Well that escalated quickly! With both guards dead, Noa and Wicket free Cindel and the Ewoks. Charal calls to Wicket to free her as well, but...

...Cindel stops him, throwing the keys into a sewer drain.

Wicket leads the escapees to the way out (how exactly does he know the way? The only path he knows is through the audience chamber, down the ramparts and into the belly of the moat monster) However...

...oops! Someone shoots the goon in the foot (I don’t see who, but who the hell let an Ewok have a blaster?!) and he runs off to sound the alarm, with the Ewoks scurrying the other way.

With Our Heroes trapped in the dungeon, Noa shows the ingenuity they taught him in the Republic Academy...

...by using explosives to make a way out!

Meanwhile Wicket and whatever Ewok has the blaster are holding off Terak and his goons to give Noa time to figure a way past the moat.

Noa uses the grapple to make a zipline across the moat and the Ewoks shimmy their way across. As the Ewoks make their way through, Cindel explains to Noa what happened to his co-pilot. Cindel also shows Noa the power core (why did Terak leave it with Cindel exactly?) Noa grabs it and they make their escape as the rear guard retreat back to the dungeon and make their way as well.

Unfortunately, Terak’s goons start their way across as well. However, that Ewok still has a blaster and shoots the grapple.

The moat monster’s gonna have one hell of a breakfast!

Chanal pleads with Terak to free her, as she learned from Cindel about Noa’s ship and promises to find it for Terak. Terak frees her, giving her back her ring. She immediately transforms into the raven and flies off to follow the escapees.

...but not before Terak takes back the ring (meaning she has to return successful or stay a bird forever) Terak mobilizes his forces as he puts the ring on a cord around his neck (I’m sure that’ll be important later)

Noa leads the Ewoks deep into the forest where Terak’s forces are hindered. Eventually they have to give up their banners, horses, and claymation lizard mounts and continue on foot. Eventually Noa brings the Ewoks to the ship. Noa plans on using the power core to fire up the ship. While he does so, he puts Wicket in charge of holding off Terak’s forces (shouldn’t be too hard, given what the Ewoks did to the Empire)

Noa plugs in the power core and hits the switch, but nothing happens (to be fair, I’m sure power core technology has advanced quite a bit since he crashed on Endor; there could be comparability issues), causing him to drop an actual F-bomb on a TV Movie aimed at kids!

...unless you had the sound off and the closed captioning on.

While Noa tries to swear the power core into being backwards compatible, Terak’s forces advance on the ship and Wicket mobilizes his team. Then the battle begins!

Noa desperately tries to power the ship up as the battle outside goes about as well as you’d expect.

Then the Ewoks get a hold of blasters and the tide starts to turn. However, Terak has numbers on his side and eventually reaches the ship (would it be wrong to call it Noa’s Ark?) Just then Noa finally gets the ship running...

...and he’s letting the Ewoks man the cannons?! Apparently it’s enough to send Terak’s forces running (lord knows it I saw a murder bear with a gun I’d run too!) However...

...Wicket once again runs afoul of one of Noa’s traps (how did none of Terak’s forces run into any of them?), causing Cindel to rush out to help. I’m sure you can guess what happens next.

Terak sends Wicket to Noa with his demands: he will trade Cindel for “the Power”. Noa arrives with a counter-offer: Release Cindel and they’ll fight for it. Somehow Terak thinks this is reasonable (to be fair, Terak is a warrior who likely fought his way into leadership while Noa is a washed-up ex-pilot with diabeedus)

Noa fights valiantly, but Terak is too powerful. Noa basically does a fighting retreat, trying to keep Terak’s attention. Eventually, Terak knocks Noa down, but just as he prepares the killing blow...

...Teek jumps into the fray! Terak throws him off, but it’s enough of a distraction for Noa to recover, though not enough to get up. Once again, Terak prepares the killing blow, but this time Wicket is on hand with his sling...

...hitting the ring (remember that?) The magic inside the ring is released...

...killing Terak. Noa is saved!

Too bad for Charal, as she’s now stuck in her bird form.

Later, after the Ewoks help Noa clear about 30 years of growth off his ship, it’s time for Noa and Cindel to return to space. Cindel bids farewell to Wicket with a callback to the beginning of the film...

(Excuse me, I have a bit of melancholy ending in my eye)

And with that, Noa’s Ark flies off and we fade to black.

[thephantomessoftheopera]

Notes on Gaston Leroux’ “The Phantom of the Opera” - Chapter 6: “The Enchanted Violin”

<< Previous Chapter

Artwork by @coatntails on deviantart

“The Enchanted Violin” introduces us to the childhood friendship of Raoul and Christine - but first, we learn that Christine did not continue to triumph at the Opera, but only sang once more in society at the invitation of the Duchess of Zurich and, after that, cancelled everything including a charity concert. She was apparently terrified by her triumph during the gala night, and didn’t “recognize herself” anymore when she sings. Before, she was emotionally distant and indifferent because she had shut everything out so she could cope with the grief of her father’s death. The amount of passion and feeling that Erik’s lessons had to rekindle in her must have felt terrifying and perhaps even painful to her. Plus, baring your heart and soul on stage like she did is, by itself, something that can indeed feel terrifying! In this chapter, we learn that Raoul has indeed been watching her performances at the Opera for some time, but also felt that she seemed indifferent to everything and everyone - until her soul finally came alive again with her gala night performance.

Philippe de Chagny has even tried to further her career with the managers to please his little brother, but Christine does not wish for him to do so. Raoul tries to seek her out, but without success. One morning though, Raoul receives a letter from Christine, assuring him that she has not forgotten the “little boy who fetched her scarf from the sea”, and informing him that she will be going to Perros-Guirec to visit her father’s grave on the anniversary of his death. Perros-Guirec is a seaside village in Brittany, quite far from Paris.

Raoul doesn’t lose time and rushes to the Montparnasse station to follow her, but fails to catch the morning train and has to wait all day for the night train (Raoul tends to have a bit of bad luck following him around).

This chapter also gives us a short biography of Christine Daaé. In the novel - contrary to the musical - she is described as blonde and blue-eyed, slender and somewhat short-sighted, which would presumably give her a bit of a dreamy, unfocused expression if nobody hands her a pair of glasses (I guess Erik wouldn’t mind her short-sightedness either!). She was born in the village of Skotelof near Uppsala in Sweden. Her father (who does not have a name in the novel) sang in the church choir and taught Christine to read music before she could read books. He also had a well-known reputation as the best violinist in Scandinavia, and was often requested to play at social gatherings. Christine’s mother died when she was 6 years old, and her father became a travelling musician and took Christine around the country. They were discovered by Professor Valerius and taken to Götheburg, where Christine received her training. His wife, Mama Valerius, treated Christine like a daughter. When the Valerius family moved to France, Christine and her father accompanied them. Papa Daaé did not adjust well to life in Paris though, and often found solace in his music only, locking himself in his room for hours at a time. The only time of the year he enjoyed was their yearly trip to the seaside town of Perros-Guirec, because the ocean reminded him of his native Sweden. Missing his nomadic lifestyle, he decided to once again to spend some time every year as a travelling musician with Christine - which is how Christine came to meet Raoul, who was then staying with his aunt - the one that kindled his love for the sea. Raoul heard Christine sing and was so utterly captivated by her angel’s voice that he started following her around with his governess. One day, at the bay of Trestraou, the wind was so strong that it blew Christine’s scarf into the sea, and Raoul ran after it fully clothed and rescued it. They became friends that summer and played together often, and Christine’s father also gave him some violin lessons.

Bay of Trestraou, where Raoul rescued Christine’s scarf from the sea (image from france-voyage.com)

Both Raoul and Christine loved listening to ancient tales and legends, especially the ones that Papa Daaé told them. Among those stories is the famous “Little Lotte”, who loved listening to the Angel of Music while she fell asleep. It’s a little funny that while they listen to the story, all Raoul does is look at Christine’s golden hair and blue eyes, imagining her as “Little Lotte”, and Christine’s thoughts are focused on how lucky Little Lotte was to hear the Angel of Music. So Raoul dreams about Christine while Christine dreams about the Angel of Music, which kind of foreshadows the setup of the love triangle in the novel.

To be honest, I can’t really blame Christine for thinking she was indeed hearing the Angel of Music in her dressing-room, since the description given fits Erik perfectly:

“No one ever saw him, but he made himself heard to those predestined to hear him. It often happened when they least expected it, when they were sad and disheartened. Then they suddenly heard heavenly harmonies and a divine voice, and they would remember it all their lives. People visited by the angel were left with a kind of flame burning inside them.”

I guess her father couldn’t really find the Angel of Music in heaven, so he sent her the next best thing that was available… Erik might not have been a heavenly angel, but the effect he had on her amounted to the same that is attributed to the Angel of Music in her father’s stories.

After their parting following the first summer that they spent together, Christine and Raoul saw each other again three years later, when they were “no longer children” - perhaps 13 to 14 years old, which would put their first meeting at about age 10 to 11. Professor Valerius has died in the meantime, and Christine’s father has started suffering from a cough. Raoul and Christine’s meeting is a little awkward this time - both seem to be developing tender feelings for each other, but are also very reserved. Their current relationship has now outgrown the sweet and carefree friendship of childhood. Raoul is quite infatuated with her, but he is also badly affected by his jealousy plus the unresolved issue of a peasant girl like Christine not being a suitable choice as a wife for a Viscount - and Christine being acutely aware of that. So yes - it’s complicated between those two. Afterwards, she tries to forget him and dedicate herself to her career instead. But when her father finally dies, her soul and her voice die with him, and even though her talent is still enough to gain entry into the Paris Conservatory, she cannot not bring any more enthusiasm to her studies, and just goes through the motions to please Mama Valerius.

Christine apparently travelled to Perros by herself, staying at the “Auberge du Soleil Couchant”. Raoul is looking forward to speaking to her alone without interference. Despite having sailed around the world, Leroux describes Raoul as “pure as a virgin” and overwhelmed by his love for Christine, who occupies his every thought - in fact, Raoul seems to obsess over things a lot in the novel, not just about Christine. When he finally meets her as she returns from mass, he jumps straight to the point and tells her that he loves her and cannot live without her - which is unfortunately not “what she wanted to hear”. Their conversation goes totally wrong and as his jealous temper gets the better of him, he behaves terribly and they get into a fight (over Erik, of course) to the point where she runs off and locks herself in her room.

Raoul, saddened by the way his meeting with Christine turned out, wanders off towards the graveyard to pray for Christine’s father, and finally sits down, looking out over the moor where he and Christine used to look for goblins when they were children. He never saw any, while Christine always saw lots despite her lack of proper eyesight - which shows that despite both of them being described as “dreamy”, Christine’s imagination is a lot more lively than Raoul’s. She finally comes out to make another try of confiding the secret of the Angel of Music who speaks to her to Raoul, but when she feels he doesn’t take her seriously and questions her virtue, she storms off again, truly angry this time and refusing to come down for dinner.

At night, about 11:30 pm, she finally sneaks out to visit her father’s grave at the Perros graveyard and meet the “Angel of Music” (aka Erik) there. This is obviously the scene which inspired “Wishing you were somehow here again”, though the original context is a little bit different. Raoul climbs out the window and follows her to the graveyard. Raoul’s account of the graveyard scene is given via a transcript of Raoul’s testimony to Commissary Mifroid a few weeks later, after Christine’s abduction. The use of this “source” is one of the things that have given rise to the theory that this is a “detective novel”, however Leroux uses it more like a historian would use a source - it’s just one of different documents that he uses (or claims to use) to prove that his story is indeed true.

Christine doesn’t notice Raoul following her. Her rendez-vous with the Angel of Music is supposedly taking place at exactly midnight at her father’s grave, so Christine is in a bit of a hurry to get there in time. It is still winter, so the graves are covered in snow and lit by the clear moonlight. Christine, who apparently has nerves of steel since she has no qualms about going to graveyards at midnight and then sitting down calmly next to a pile of actual skulls and bones, kneels down to pray when divinely beautiful violin music is suddenly heard, but no player is seen anywhere. The sounds of the piece,  the “Resurrection of Lazarus” are so enthralling that Raoul himself is reminded of the legend of the Angel of Music.

When the music finally ceases, Raoul hears a sound from the pile of bones, and assumes that the invisible musician might be hiding there. Christine leaves, and suddenly the skulls start rolling towards Raoul, and he sees a shadow enter the church. He chases after him and manages to grab his cloak, and when the shadow turns around, he sees a terrifying death’s-head with burning eyes which shocks him so much that he faints. I assume that Erik was not wearing a mask here, and that his unmasked face was weapon enough to take Raoul out without any further need for fireballs or swordfights.

The next morning, Raoul is found half-frozen in the little church, and Christine and the landlady of the Inn both take care to revive him.

Historic images of Perros-Guirec from phantomstheater.weebly.com

Artwork by CoatNTails on deviantart

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[immaturityofthomasastruc]

IOTA Reviews: Miraculous World: New York - United HeroeZ

So... with the recent announcement that Seasons 4 and 5 of Miraculous Ladybug will air on Disney+, with one episode set to air around March 27th (and it's out of order because of course it is), I figured I would try something new with this blog.

While I'm sure Astruc will be more active while the new season is airing, I figured I'd take a stab at reviewing new episodes of Miraculous Ladybug when they come out, as I already have a Disney+ account that I only really use to watch Star Wars and other Disney Channel cartoons I've never seen before. Well, that and the gloriousness that is Mech-X4.

And I was thinking that since a certain special is already available on Disney+, I'll review it now. Consider it my, uh...

279 Follower Special. Yeah, that’s it.

Miraculous World: New York – United Heroez is the first in a series of Miraculous Ladybug specials with the premise of having our heroes travel around the world. Because I guess that's what you do with your show when you run out of ideas for things your characters can do. Just ask Ash Ketchum and Thomas the Tank Engine.

The special is somewhat polarizing among the fandom, with some loving it, and some hating it. If you've seen some of my earlier posts, you probably already know how I feel about this.

Anyway, let's take a look at Miraculous World: New York – United Heroez

We start off with a logo letting us know this is going to be the start of a series of specials called Miraculous World.

Yeah, I'm sure that'll be remembered among other great cinematic universes like the Dark Universe and Ghost Corps.

In all seriousness, this is actually a pretty decent opening. It has some nice visuals that inform the audience of the globetrotting gimmick seen in the special, and the orchestral cover of the Miraculous Ladybug theme sounds pretty badass.

The special truly starts off in the middle of an Akuma fight, where we see that Mr. Pigeon is taking inspiration from Startrain's plan to escape to the one place that hasn't been corrupted by capitalism... SPACE! Apparently, this is the 51st time that Ladybug and Cat Noir have fought him, which makes you wonder if Hawkmoth is either running out of ideas, or if he just wants to see how insane Mr. Pigeon's plans can get for the hell of it.

Ladybug and Cat Noir transform into their new space forms that they've obviously had for a while, given Alya's familiarity with their names... even though those forms probably would have been useful when they were fighting Startrain. And this is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of things this special retcons.

We get a few interactions between Ladybug and Cat Noir to give new viewers an idea of what the Love Square dynamic is like, with Cat Noir fawning over Ladybug after she leaves, and Marinette gushing over a new poster Adrien is in. I'll get back to this later,

After that, we see a brief clip from a student film teaching the audience about the real life friendship between George Washington and Marquis de Lafayette (the latter actually becoming one of Washington's close advisors during the Revolutionary War), and how it lead to the completely made up, “French American Friendship week”, which is basically an excuse for Marinette and Adrien's class to go to New York for a week.

Their teacher, Ms. Bustier isn't going with them because she's having a baby (God help us if the writers resort to pregnancy jokes next season), so the only other teacher in the school, Ms. Mendeleiev, will be supervising the class instead.

Adrien isn't able to go to New York because his father won't let him, and even he lampshades how predictable this is. But as soon as Lila suggests spending time with Adrien, Marinette immediately declares she will try to get Adrien to come on the trip with everyone, because he's her friend... and then Alya mocks her for saying that in the very next scene.

And here is the first problem with this special: The way Marinette's crush on Adrien is portrayed.

We're supposed to see Marinette as being in denial about her feelings for Adrien, but when you think about how Season 3 ended with Marinette realizing Adrien and Kagami (who will make an appearance in this special later on) are happy together, it makes sense that she wants to do this. She wants to move on from her crush on Adrien and try to be friends with him.

Unfortunately, her “best friend” Alya isn't willing to let her move on, which is extremely hypocritical when you remember how often she teased her for her behavior around Adrien, to the point where her other “friends” made bets about Marinette's hesitance to confess to him (Cat Blanc). Does she even know about Adrien and Kagami?

And throughout this special, rather than acknowledge Marinette's decision to move on, she constantly teases Marinette about how she still has feelings for Adrien, instead of simply leaving her alone. She reaches salt fic levels of unlikable in this special.

It doesn't help that Marinette's anxiety around Adrien is cranked up to twelve in this special, with her constantly stammering, or fidgeting around to the point where she struggles to get through a door. Twice. And as always, this behavior is only going to be played for laughs, because the showrunners are running out of ways to make Marinette suffer for comedy. And it only gets worse from here.

While watching a news report about a necklace and sabre George Washington had given to him by Lafyette, Nathalie, bedridden from the events of the season finale, tells Gabriel that the necklace in question is actually a lost Miraculous.

And as soon as Marinette arrives, Gabriel tells her that he's going to let Adrien go on the trip. His reason?

Gabriel: Letting Adrien go to New York will be simpler than hiding my absence here from him. Besides, this will allow me to continue keeping an eye on him.

Yeah, he seriously thinks it's a good idea to send his son to the same place he's planning to attack as part of one of his plans. At least you could make the argument that whenever Adrien is endangered during an Akuma attack, he's simply caught in the crossfire because he's in the wrong place at the wrong time, like with “Style Queen”. Here, Gabriel is intentionally letting Adrien go to New York, while claiming that he will be able to monitor him while he plots to attack the city. This is like if Grand Moff Tarkin let his son go to Alderaan for vacation. And again, it only gets worse from here.

Though Gabriel waits a day to tell Adrien he's going to New York, because of he did, we wouldn't get any scenes of Adrien moping around about how much his life sucks. Well, that and a scene of him and Kagami, where the latter kisses him. This is Kagami's only scene in the special, and she isn't mentioned again after this.

As Ladybug, Marinette tells Cat Noir she's going away for a few days and trusts him to guard Paris as long as he alerts her of an Akuma or Sentimonster. What will happen to the Miracle Box Marinette inherited from Former Master In Name Only Fu is never explained.

To Adrien's credit, it's Plagg that convinces him to go on the trip even though Ladybug trusted him, and even then, it takes a little bit to convince Adrien, showing he still takes his job seriously, with him coming up with a plan in case an Akuma attacks. It's not perfect, but it's something. That all goes to hell later on, though.

We then see Gabriel once again talking to Emilie's corpse about his plan.

Gabriel: Blah, blah, blah, Emilie. Blah, blah, blah, blah, I'll get Ladybug and Cat Noir's Miraculous this time for sure. Blah, blah, blah, blah, I'm such a good father and sympathetic villain.

Oh, sorry. That's how I hear most of his monologues to Emilie these days. My bad.

The next scene features something I bet you've never seen before, Marinette being late for something. Thankfully, Luka gives her a ride to help her catch up, hoping that the trip will “give her some clarity”, most likely referring to her conflicting emotions. Marinette then kisses Luka goodbye and gets on the bus. This is Luka's only scene in the special, and he isn't mentioned again after this.

On the plane, it turns out that Adrien is conveniently sitting next to Marinette, prompting Alya to tease Marinette yet again while making this face.

Alya: (smirking and talking in a very smug tone of voice) Awesome, Marinette! Go and sit next to your “friend”! So you two can enjoy a nice flight together! A very long flight.

Alya continues to relentlessly tease Marinette and makes fun of her crush for no real reason, suggesting Marinette get off the plane because “New York is the most romantic city in the world after Paris”. And this gives her a goddamn panic attack where she frantically tries to run off the plane. Remember kids, if someone has some kind of anxiety or social awkwardness, it's perfectly fine to tease and make fun of their behavior, and even exploit it for your own amusement.

And after some unfunny hilarious slapstick involving Marinette on the plane, Alya continues her streak of treating Marinette like her plaything.

Nino: If only this trip could help Adrien finally come out of his shell.

Alya: And if only it could help Marinette be more honest with herself and clearer about her feelings!

Nino: Operation New York?

Alya: Operation New York!

Nino: Let's help them loosen up!

Alya: After all, isn't the United States the land of the free?

Well, the only thing you actually got right about America is forcing others to do things they don't want to do. Just ask the Native Americans.

It's scenes like this why Alya is portrayed so negatively in salt fics. And this happens throughout the special. Now, while I'm not really a drinker, I'm guessing there's at least one person reading this post right now who is. So I have a little idea for a game. Every time Alya acts like a terrible friend to Marinette, take a shot. I'd just have a donor ready in case one of your kidneys gives up on you.

After an admittedly nice scene of Adrien thanking Marinette for convincing his father to let him come (undercut by Marinette creepily commenting on Adrien's cologne as they hug), another problem with this special rears its ugly head, as a man with oddly-colored skin arrives on one of the plane's wings.

Alya: Oh, no! That's Techno-Pirate, the supervillain who steals technology!

Yeah. This is happening. The special is just casually introducing this new supervillain, Techno-Pirate as well as some other superheroes, neither of which had any buildup before, not even a throwaway line They're just here now.

So some of the American superheroes are to save the day, now, I guess. Majestia, the Superman knockoff, helps steer the plane back into position, her robotic daughter, Uncanny Valley, helps fix the plane's broken wing, while Knightowl and Sparrow, the Batman and Robin knockoffs, deal with Techno-Pirate. And everyone just treats this like a regular occurrence.

Marinette: Wow! That all happened so fast! I didn't have time to transform or help out!

Adrien: Good thing the American superheroes were here. I couldn't have transformed here. I'm supposed to be in Paris!

Plagg: Relax, Adrien! Let the local superheroes handle their own problems.

I have so many problems with this plot development. Just how common is the knowledge that there are other superheroes besides Ladybug and Cat Noir in other countries? How have they never been mentioned until now? Why is everyone just accepting the fact that there are other superheroes?

I get that these characters weren't conceived around the time the show started, but the way they're just thrown into the story is just so confusing and does so many things to hurt the narrative instead of helping it. In other episodes, Majestia and Knightowl were only seen in comic books, and Ladybug and Cat Noir were seen as the only heroes in the world because the world itself was fairly down to earth, barring some more advanced technology (the police's weapons in “Origins”, Hawkmoth's lair, Max's robot, Markov, the space dumpsters in “Reverser”, and the AI in Startrain).

The fact that New York is apparently filled with all kinds of superheroes for very mundane things like directing traffic and selling hot dogs just makes the Miraculous seem less important. If there was more work done to better integrate them into the story, like maybe making them an American secret or something, it could have worked. To quote a character voiced by Jason Lee...

And the sad thing was that Power Rangers was able to pull something like this off far better in 1995. During the third season of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Master Vile had successfully reversed the Earth's rotation, turning the Power Rangers into children (yes, it runs on Superman logic, just go with it). Because of this, the Rangers are unable to morph, with the villains free to attack the city. In response, Zordon sends out a distress call to another team of Power Rangers from the planet Aquitar.

Now I know what you're thinking. If Zordon had the ability to contact another team of Power Rangers for help, why did it take him so long to do so? The episode immediately answers the question by pointing out that Aquitar is a planet made entirely of water, so it's incredibly dangerous for them to head to a planet like Earth, making their intervention a last resort. And even after they come, a major plot thread is finding ways to keep the Alien Rangers hydrated, which only gets worse when the Alien Rangers' enemy, Hydro Hog, arrives to drain Earth's water while teaming up with the main villains.

The integration of the Alien Rangers into the story generally feels natural, and there is a clear explanation as to why they haven't joined the battle until now, and even then, still place some hurdles for them to overcome. Here, the special just wants the audience to immediately accept the fact that there are hundreds of superheroes in New York.

So as Marinette and Adrien's class arrives in New York, we see Sparrow watching over them, referring to them as “the little croissants”. That's another thing the special gets right about America: casually making racist comments.

Uncanny Valley's civilian form, Aeon, sees Marinette and Adrien, and, of course, she says that they're “made for each other”. If only the writers actually bothered to give us evidence of that fact that everyone loves to say for some reason. Though we do get the only instance of sanity regarding the Love Square in this special, where Sparrow's civilian form, Jess, calls out Aeon for thinking of getting them together.

Aeon: Those two are made for each other.

Jess: Seriously, Aeon? Not again!

Aeon: But I am programmed to help people, Jess!

Jess: Just stop meddling with people's private lives!

Also, I had already mentioned the unfortunate implications of Aeon being programmed to “help people” in an earlier post, but I still want to reiterate that I don't think any of that was intentional at all, and I definitely don't think a single writer on this show is actually racist. Everyone got that? Okay, moving on.

Jess and Aeon are assigned to watch over the Parisian students while they sneak out to a party on the rooftop of the hotel they're staying at, where they meet another superhero, Hot Dog Dan. He gives random people magical hot dogs that give them temporary superpowers. Marinette and Adrien share one, and they both start flying before Adrien offers to slow dance with Marinette.

Okay... It's clear they they're trying to reference an earlier episode, “Despair Bear”, by having Marinette and Adrien dance to the same song they danced to in that episode. The problem is that the context isn't right.

Adrien is dating Kagami, and he's offering to do this... why? What makes him so interested in Marinette all of a sudden? I get that he doesn't realize Marinette has feelings for him, but if someone says they only see you as a friend, do you offer to slow dance with them? Especially if their reaction to your offer is recoiling in fear?

I'm sorry, writers, but you can't try to recreate some of the magic you had in earlier episodes with Adrienette when you have clearly established Lukanette and Adrigami as official relationships at the moment. And don't give me any of that “that's not the point of the special” crap. The season finale showed Marinette and Adrien getting together with Luka and Kagami respectively, so it's natural that a lot of people were looking forward to seeing how they worked as couples. I'll get back to this point later on.

Meanwhile, Gabriel has made his way to New York, and decides to akumatize the arrested Techno-Pirate into Technolizer, asking him to steal Lafyette's sabre from the museum instead of the necklace.

Back to the museum, Alya and Nino decide to send Marinette and Adrien into a room alone where they're locked in and attacked by the supervillain Solutide...'s hologram, which was all part of Jess and Aeon's plan. In a city where there is a superhero and supervillain on every street. They seriously planned on giving Marinette and Adrien a near-death experience to get them to realize their love for each other.

That's... pretty fucking demented.

What if Marinette and Adrien did something reckless in their attempt to escape? They could have seriously gotten hurt. Hell, what if the scare gave either of them a heart attack? And let's say either of them found out what the plan was (which would be pretty easy, given “Solitude” is a hologram). Do you think either of them would be happy with Alya and Nino, even if they confessed their love for each other? And none of them even think to apologize for what they did, and this scene is never mentioned again. To quote a certain internet reviewer. WHAT WERE THEY THINKING!?

Though to be fair, the scene before was the only scene where Alya gets to use a brain cell in this special by pointing how wrong that plan is... for a second before she goes along with it. So close, Alya. So close...

So after Adrien gets a news report revealing that Robustus is attacking Paris (even though Markov is with them in New York), while Marinette isn't contacted by Cat Noir. The situation only gets worse when Technolizer attacks, getting the sabre in the process.

Sparrow and Uncanny Valley try to fight him off, but are quickly overwhelmed, with some of the latter's technology getting stolen by Technolizer. Marinette and Adrien transform and help out the two heroes, naturally being confused by the other's presence.

But while the four heroes chase after Technolizer, Hawkmoth shows competence for once and steals the necklace in the process, while revealing that the Robustus attacking Paris was actually a Sentimonster created by Mayura.

During the fight, rather than focusing on stopping the already dangerous supervillain powered up by Hawkmoth, Ladybug decides to trash talk Cat Noir instead. I get that she's angry at him for not following through on his promise, but can't she wait until after the fight?

Ladybug: (mockigly) “Just go and rest easy! Yeah, leave Paris with me!”

Cat Noir: I-I didn't know I was going to leave! It was a last-minute decision, that's all!

Ladybug: Do you realize that because of you, there's no one in Paris to protect the city?! Why didn't you tell me that you were leaving?!

Cat Noir: I was afraid you'd get angry!

Ladybug: And you were right, because as you can see, I AM angry!

To quote our recently inaugurated president, will you shut up, man? People say I'm too harsh on Cat Noir for the way he acted during episodes like “Syren”, but this is basically the same thing. Ladybug is prioritizing her own feelings over stopping Technolizer. Yes, she has a right to be angry at Cat Noir, but all she has to do is wait until after the battle to chew him out.

And during the battle, Ladybug outright says she can't trust Cat Noir anymore, making the latter flinch, so Technolizer throws him into Uncanny Valley with his Cataclysm activated, killing her.

In her anger, Majestia punches Technolizer through several buildings before Hawkmoth recalls the Akuma inside him before helping the villain get away. Ladybug casts her Miraculous Ladybug, fixing Uncanny Valley, but that's not enough. Knightowl is pissed, and orders Ladybug and Cat Noir to hand over their Miraculous, not listening to why they're so important, so the two run away.

To make things worse, the two find out about Hawkmoth's plan, and Ladybug explains she can only use Miraculous Ladybug to fix damage caused by a specific villain, and since the Sentimonster is gone, she can't do anything.

In his grief, Cat Noir admits that everything that happened is his fault, so he renounces Plagg and hands over his Miraculous to Ladybug before running away.

So... this scene.

This. Scene.

Where. Do I. Begin?

First of all, this is what causes Ladybug to lose trust in Cat Noir? Not the multiple times he disobeyed her orders because of his own personal feelings? Not the constant flirting and unwanted advances even though she's made it clear she doesn't see him that way? Not the time he trusted an evil doppelganger of Ladybug over the real one? It's this? Cat Noir leaving Paris alone while a Sentimonster attacked?

Okay, let's say that Cat Noir decided to stay in Paris after all. What was he supposed to do when Robustus attacked around the same time as Technolizer? What was Ladybug supposed to do when she found out about Robustus in Paris? Was she supposed to abandon New York and head back there or focus on helping the American heroes?

Second, who does Knightowl think she (yeah, she's a woman, I'll get to that in a bit) is ordering Ladybug and Cat Noir to hand over their Miraculous? What authority does she hold over them? Why should they listen to her? Why can't they simply explain why their Miraculous are so important, and that they can't give them up? Why doesn't Ladybug just explain that she's now the Guardian of the Miraculous? In fact, why does Majestia go along with the order? Ladybug still saved her daughter's life! If anything, she should be sticking up for the two.

There's actually a Superman comic where Captain Marvel storms a police station to interrogate a criminal who killed his best friend so he can find out who hired him. Though he comes close to doing it, Captain Marvel ultimately doesn't kill the criminal's boss, but still flies over to Mount Everest to grieve his friend's death.

Enter Superman, planning to call out Captain Marvel, but instead, he sees him crying. He explains that the boy killed was his best friend before revealing his identity as Billy Batson. Superman's response?

He goes to the wizard Shazam and demands to know why he did this to Billy, furious that a child was forced to go through stuff like that. While Shazam can't take back the powers he gave Billy, he encourages Superman to reach out to Billy, leading to him revealing his identity as Clark Kent to the kid.

I'm not saying that Majestia or Knightowl should have called out Master Fu or ask who made Ladybug the Guardian (as awesome as that would have been), but the point I am trying to make is in that comic, Superman made the effort to understand what Billy had been through, and understood what happened. Majestia and Knightowl made no effort to do anything like that. In fact, they never even knew Hawkmoth existed, which I call bullcrap on, given that he once MOVED THE PLANET AWAY FROM ITS ORBIT. Were you all asleep that day? Why didn't you do anything to help Ladybug and Cat Noir fight Hawkmoth? Were you expecting them to just fight this magical terrorist on their own? They don't have the same support system the American heroes have, and they could really use the help.

And third, Cat Noir. Yeah, just because I'm calling out Ladybug doesn't mean Cat Noir isn't taking any heat either. Again, I have to ask, this is what makes him give up? Keep in mind, when he was Aspik in “Desperada” and saw Ladybug get captured by an Akuma, he reversed time 25,913 times to try and save her before he threw in the towel. At the same time, he was willing to quit in “Syren” because he claimed Ladybug didn't trust him. The level of Adrien's willingness to keep going is incredibly inconsistent, and this doesn't really help his reputation as a character.

And then there's the fact that he's bailing on Ladybug when things are at their absolute worst. Yes, Marinette also briefly gave up in “Origins”, but that was after her first battle, and she was overwhelmed by her screw-up endangering countless lives in Paris in addition to being a nervous wreck even before she got her Miraculous. But here's the difference: She took responsibility. She realized people were in danger, so she jumped into action to save Alya and Cat Noir. Even then, she acknowledged her failure and felt unsure of herself, with Cat Noir helping to reassure her, showing the emotional support their partnership has.

Adrien, who has been a superhero for months, and has faced some pretty stressful situations, as soon as things head south, he immediately gives up and leaves Ladybug to fend for herself while two separate cities are in danger. And he knows that she has no other allies, because Master Fu ran away at the end of the last season, and Miracle Queen exposed the identities of the other temporary heroes. She has nobody to go to for help. He doesn't even show Ladybug her civilian form to apologize, just so he can't get any flak in his regular life. He just gives Ladybug his ring, and literally runs away.

A wise man once said “With great power, there must also come great responsibility.” Adrien has shown no responsibility at ALL in this special, barring the one moment I mentioned earlier.

It's nothing more than a forced emotional moment that has no buildup. This is basically the same with basically every time Miraculous Ladybug tries to be emotional. The writers think that despite never really having any tension or character arcs in their story, they can just have their characters cry out of nowhere, and suddenly, it's a deep moment? That's not how writing works, idiots!

Back at the hotel, Jess and Aeon are getting chewed out by their mothers (Who are the civilian identities of Majestia and Knightowl), and have a conversation about being superheroes... less than a few feet away from the French students. Though at least Barbara, the civilian form of Knightowl (again, I'll get to that later) calls out Aeon and Jess for their stupid “fake supervillain plan”, so there's that I guess.

So we cut to a press conference where the President of the United States, Camilla Hombee (An anagram of Michelle Obama's name, because Astruc has made it clear what his political views are) advises everyone to stay inside while Techno-Pirate is still an active threat. Why does this seem so familiar? And then she... transforms into a superhero too.

Oh, for the love of-- THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES IS A SUPERHERO?! The person in charge of the country and relations with foreign nations is a superhero too?! If she's the president, why didn't she do anything to stop Hawkmoth?! I get that America doesn't really care about news from other countries outside of America, but you would think that the frickin president, WHO IS A SUPERHERO, would at least acknowledge the existence of a supervillain in Paris as a threat!

GOD, this is stupid! And it only gets worse...

Gabriel sends a car to pick up Adrien, realizing the city was too dangerous (I still don't get the point of sending him here in the first place), causing him to tearfully say that he “wouldn't have minded being stuck here a little longer with a friend like her” before leaving. And then Alya...

Alya: What is wrong with you, Marinette?! Couldn't you see that he was just waiting for you to tell him to stay?!

Marinette: What-? But I...? He...? He made his choice. What did you expect me to do?

Alya: It doesn't matter what I expected you to do! Who's Adrien to you?! A friend or more than a friend?! There will never be a better time to be clear with yourself, Marinette! Do you want him to leave or do you want him to stay?!

NO. You do not have the right to say ANY of that! It doesn't matter what YOU expected Marinette to do? This whole special, you've been teasing her about her feelings for Adrien, and forcing her into uncomfortable situations with him all because you want your OTP to be a thing. And now you're saying Marinette had a choice the whole time? Marinette expected herself to get over Adrien and start to see him as a friend, AND YOU WOULDN'T LET HER DO THAT! For three seasons, Alya has made fun of Marinette's crush on Adrien, while at the same time, has constantly pushed her into situations where she was clearly uncomfortable around him to the point where she discouraged Marinette for trying to move on in a previous episode (Frozer). And then in this special, she trapped them in a room with a fake supervillain (which is this world's equivalent to pretending to be a terrorist) just to get them to confess their feelings for each other. AND THE WHOLE TIME, IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE MARINETTE'S CHOICE???

If Obilvio didn't make me stop caring about Alya, this was the moment that actually me despise her.

And the worst part? The narrative frames her as being right. This is somehow enough for Marinette to run out in the pouring rain while a supervillain is lose in New York, with nobody even trying to stop her, to chase after Adrien's car, where she tearfully confesses that she still loves him after the car gets away.

What is the point of this exactly? We already knew Marinette liked Adrien last season, her nonexistent character arc was learning to get over him, and now she's supposed to learn she's still interested in him? What about Luka? Are we just going to ignore Luka? What about the fact that Kagami is already in a relationship with Adrien? None of these questions are never explained.

Gabriel finds the lost Miraculous, the Eagle Miraculous, which represents Freedom, and gives it to Techno-Pirate, turning him into Miraclonizer. Using the Eagle Miraculous' power, Liberation, he can undo any mental boundaries someone has, but since he's using it for evil, it basically drives several heroes crazy without their own moral codes. And while I claimed it was an original power in one of my earlier posts, the more I think about it, Liberation is really just a different version of Reverser's airplanes. All they did was just phrase the explanation a different way.

So despite being a city full of superheroes, Miraclonizer manages to drive every hero crazy in a matter of minutes, with the exception of Jess and Aeon. So do none of the other heroes have sidekicks? Is there not even a Young Justice or Teen Titans-esque team in this city? I'm just saying, if they have a hot dog superhero, there should be at least more than two sidekicks in New York.

Aeon goes to search out Ladybug and Cat Noir, and because of some technobabble stuff, Aeon can easily figure out their identities. Again, this was something I already talked about in an earlier post, so I won't harp on this scene. It's a dumb retcon in a special full of dumb retcons, what else can I say?

So Aeon goes to find Adrien on his private plane to give him back his Miraculous... even though wouldn't it make more sense for Aeon to use it instead to save time? I didn't mention this, but right before this scene, Majestia was pushing the moon towards the Earth. Time is kind of the essence here. It also would have saved us more of Adrien's whining.

Uncanny Valley: Cat Noir, New York and Ladybug need you!

Adrien: (looks at where his ring used to be) I'm no longer Cat Noir.

Uncanny Valley: To err is human, apparently!

Adrien: My mistakes are unforgivable. I couldn't bear to see the disappointment in her eyes.

“i'M sO tOrTuReD. fEeL bAd FoR mE, dAmNiT!”

Cut it out with Angstdrien Depreste already, writers. It's gotten old.

And despite making a big deal about how much he failed Ladybug, he immediately jumps back into action as soon as he hears a recording of Ladybug saying she needs him. I know it's supposed to be a heartwarming thing by showing him wanting to support his lady, but to me, it just comes off more like he needed an ego boost. He was fulling willing to let Ladybug save the day on her own, but as soon as he heard how important he is to Ladybug, he's more than willing to become Cat Noir again. Because it's not like he could regret his decision to abandon his partner, and realize it isn't too late to make up for his mistake, right? That would imply Adrien is motivated by anything other than his feelings for Ladybug. Then there's the fact that as soon as Cat Noir returns, Ladybug instantly forgives him, despite saying earlier that she didn't trust him. It's almost like that whole debacle was only there to eat up about fifteen minutes of the special's runtime.

Hawkmoth issues an ultimatum to Ladybug and Cat Noir. Miraclonizer is ready to fire a nuclear missile (though the dub calls it a rocket, let's be honest, it's not), fully intending to start World War III unless Ladybug and Cat Noir give up. He's seriously willing to risk making The Day After a reality all for his wife. But remember, you're still supposed to feel bad for this literal war criminal.

Ladybug, Cat Noir, Aeon, and Sparrow manage to get to Miraclonizer's hideout, the Statue of Liberty, and take back the Eagle Miraculous, with Sparrow taking it and transforming into Eagle.

And then there's the design of the new hero's suit. While I'm glad it isn't another skintight jumpsuit, and the wings are a nice touch, people have raised some questions regarding Eagle's design, and how it feels like the animators really want to remind the audience that Jess is Native American. I mean, it looks like what Zack Morris wore in that one episode of Saved by the Bell barring the headdress.

And this might be because I'm a history major, and I just brushed up on this subject in class last semester, but I'm a little uncomfortable with the fact that someone actually thought it was a good idea to give the Native American girl the Miraculous of the Eagle, the symbol of America which represents Freedom. I don't want to go too into detail about this, but, uh... let's just say if you know about the history of the relationship between the Native Americans and the colonists, you'll get why this raises a couple of red flags.

Does this mean I think the showrunners are racist? No, it was an honest, albeit questionable mistake. Do I think this is the worst Native American representation on TV. Oh, hell no. Chakotay from Star Trek: Voyager was a walking amalgam of every Native American stereotype in the book, and was featured in an episode that said, with a straight face, mind you, that Native Americans used to be backwards savages, so a group of white aliens genetically altered them so not only could they survive the Earth's harsh weather, but so they would become more creative, leading to the birth of Native American culture. I apologize to any Native American human being who had the misfortune of learning about that for the first time. But over all, Jess is far from the bottom of the barrel of poor Native American representation.

So Jess uses her powers to calm every superhero down, while Ladybug and Cat Noir de-evilize Technolizer. And of course, Hawkmoth assumes that since there are other lost Miraculous, “they will be his”. Maybe focus on getting the two Miraculous you originally set out to get first, buddy.

So Knightowl and Majestia apologize for their behavior, and we learn that apparently Knightowl and Sparrow have been around for at least since the Wild West, and that the Knighowl and Majestia we've been following have been keeping up the illusion that the original duo are still alive for several generations.

Was this special written in the 1950's? Why make a big deal out of this? Why is it so important that Knightowl and Sparrow both have a Y chromosome? The president is a woman and a superhero, the strongest superhero on Earth is a woman, and you were just saved by a female superhero all the way from Paris. I don't think people will be afraid of getting cooties from this Knightowl. Hell, we live in a world where if you don't like a female superhero, people automatically hate you. Just ask the people who didn't like Captain Marvel.

We see that Alya still learned nothing, as she continues to tease Marinete for daring to call Adrien her “friend”, as our special mercifully ends with the class sending a picture of a banner to Adrien to show their support... but not before a brief scene where a Guardian tries to take Eagle's Miraculous, before she makes him instantly pull a 180 as soon as she suggests he help to “create a new generation of heroes together”.

I'm guessing this is meant to be yet another tie-in to yet another Miraculous side project that will go absolutely nowhere. You might as well have had Nick Fury, oh, I'm sorry, Mick Flurry, recruit Eagle and Uncanny Valley for the ZAG Initiative.

But it doesn't matter, because the special's over, and once again, I never have to think about it ever again.

So... what else can I say that I haven't already said. This special sucks.

While the animation is honestly some of the best to come out of ZAG, and the action can get pretty good at times, it honestly doesn't really mean much when the story surrounding it is just so abysmal. Basically the only thing I liked about the Season 3 finale was the idea that the status quo was shifting in terms of Marinette's feelings for Adrien, and this special just ruined this interesting idea by the end faster than you can say “the series finale of Quantum Leap”.

Alya is at her most unlikable here with everything she does in this special. Almost everything she says to Marinette is either some catty comment or making fun of her trying to get over Adrien. Because God forbid she actually try to grow as a person and not let her life revolve around a cute boy. It's stuff like this that I genuinely wonder why Marinette even bothers to stay friends with her when all she does is tease her and force her out of her comfort zone. And according to co-director Wilfried “Winny” Pain, Alya is meant to be like Jiminy Cricket to Marinette's Pinocchio. I don't know which version of Pinocchio he read as a kid, but clearly, it's not the version we're mostly familiar with.

I'm still glad they didn't have Cat Noir revert back into his Ladybug-simping self we all knew and loathed in Season 3, but that doesn't mean he's still enjoyable in this special. The angsting about how sad Adrien's life is stopped being interesting years ago, and it's only done as a way to get the audience to care about him, but it comes off more like the writers are holding the audience at gunpoint and demanding they sympathize with him for bailing on the world when they need him the most.

I thought Aeon was a pretty likable character. Maybe it's because I'm a sucker for socially awkward robot characters like Data or Penny. I just wish we got to know her more, and why exactly her mother felt the need to play God by create her instead of just adopting like what Olympia and Barbara presumably did with Jess.

As a matter of fact, despite being played up as a big deal, there's still a lot about the American heroes that we don't really know about. How were the “United Heroes” formed in the first place? How did Majestia get her powers? What exactly is the origin of Knightowl and Sparrow? Why are all the American heroes so open about their identities to the point where the President's identity as a superhero is so well-known she can casually transform on TV? Hell, Ladybug and Cat Noir barely even interact with any of the heroes, and that includes Uncanny Valley and Sparrow/Eagle.

Generally, the special feels very rushed at times, with a lot of ideas not really being utilized. According to Astruc, there was actually a lot of things cut from the special, including a deleted subplot with Chloe and Ms. Mendeleiev. Although, given Astruc's track record, I don't think it would have been a good one given Chloe is involved.

This leads into a personal theory I have regarding this special, that I want everyone reading this to take it with a huge grain of salt. As much as he claims that he can't change anything he's already written, I personally believe that Thomas Astruc rewrote part of this special so Adrienette could get more focus to renew interest in the ship.

Hear me out on this. During Season 3, there were a lot more shipping debates between Adrienette shippers and Lukanette shippers, with the latter gaining more traction that season. It was also the season where other ships like Felinette, Kagaminette, and even Maribat became more prominent. And all of these ships were featured in post-Chameleon salt fics bashing Astruc's sunshine child, Adrien.

So, given how Astruc already dedicated an entire episode to bashing Felix fans, why wouldn't he use something like the New York special to convince the shippers to have more faith in the Love Square? After all, aren't Adrien and Marinette made for each other? Astruc has already said so on his Twitter.

Unfortunately, right now, I like to describe the Love Square as “Shrodinger's Relationship”. While the show can claim that Adrien and Marinette would make a great couple, they simultaneously show no real chemestry happening between the two in favor of Love Square shenanigans. And yes, I'm actually thinking of talking about the Love Square in a future analysis post.

And then there's the fact that Astruc himself said that everything that happened in this special is going to lead into the events of Season 4. What do I have to say about that?

Bring it.

I already talk about Miraculous Ladybug itself on this blog almost as much as I talk about its creator, and since I have a Disney+ account, I might as well subject myself to everything Season 4 has to offer. I've already seen one of my favorite shows go to hell, so why don't I chronicle another one of my favorite shows going to hell as well?

So yeah, as soon as a new episode is officially released on Disney+, expect a review from your boy IOTA.

I survived Season 3, so let's see if the number 4 is as unlucky as some countries say it is.

[sokkas1mp]

I gonna break in this acocunt with me being angry about something that doesn't really matter (very fitting for tumblr if you ask me), this article.

First: "And I’m sorry to open with this, but part of that is due to the age difference between them. Two years is hardly worlds apart (I’m personally working with four), but a 12-year-old boy and a 14-year-old girl are. Especially the way these two are drawn. Not to be too voyeuristic about Y7 cartoons, but Katara has clearly gone through puberty, while Aang hasn’t. There is something just…off, about a sixth grade boy having a full on make-out sesh with a high school girl."

This argument is one of the most stupid ones if you ask me, because it blatantly ignores the culture we have been presented by the show. I can understand why people find this weird, but we have to try not to look at it as if its our society, because its not. In A:tla, specifically the water tribes, 16 is marrying age. Right there, our "age norms" (idk what else to call it) are very different. And there are no divisions between ages in their world like we have with middle and high school. To me, two people are fit to be together based on their maturity, not their age. That's why 45 & 40 is not the same as 15 & 10, or 20 & 15. This is the same for Kataang. They have very similar life experiences and matured together, literally side by side, so a two year ago gap is irrelevant.

Second: "...Katara took on a very maternal role with Aang. Sure, she’s a caretaker and sort of a “mom friend,” but it’s a bit more than that. She served as his literal guardian during the show’s run—there’s just no other way to look at it. By the third episode, she called herself his “family,” and later even went on to role play as his mother to get him out of trouble at school. Aang, meanwhile, was… Well, I wouldn’t say “immature” for his age, […] However, Katara is 14 going on 25, while Aang is just, Aang."

There's a compilation of Katara doing thing with Aang that if someone saw a mother doing with her son they would call it incest:

Katara definitely acts motherly towards Aang, but that is just her nature. She is more than just motherly with him. And some people like to call the check kisses familial (which is kinda weird imo), but we know Katara herself doesnt think that:

"Easy there, big brother" She pushes Sokka away. Not to mention, this was about a scene or two before she kisses Aang on the check.

Calling someone close to you your family does not mean you see them in the same way you see your parents/siblings. And Sokka played Aang's father in that scene, but we aren't sitting here using that as evidence to call him Aang's paternal figure.

Something Aang haters forget (or chose to ignore) is that being lighthearted and goofy does not equal immature. Yes, Aang does some juvenile things, but that shouldn't take away from his growth and maturity.

Third: "In fact, in the last season, Katara was shown to be uncomfortable each time Aang kisses her, and even went as far as to tell him to back off with the romantic stuff in the episode before the finale, because she was confused about how she felt. [*new paragraph*] Yet, in the end, she just trots up and blushes at Aang, than happily makes out with him when he goes for it,"

Katara initiated 2/4 of the kataang kisses (not including the check kisses). The kiss in The Cave of Two Lovers and the kiss in the finale. Yes, she's the one that "goes for it" in the finale (she also initiates the hug). She only pulls away once out of the 3 times we see a kiss end (this would be excluding the kiss in The Cave of Two Lovers). She wasn't confused about her feelings, she didn't want to have to worry about a relationship when they were nearing the end of the war.

Fourth: "The post-canon comics only furthered the lack of exploration of her feelings in this relationship"

Fifth: "[referencing a scene in The Promise in which Katara is jealous of a fanclub being around Aang] "I'm sorry, this amazing, adult communication is blowing me away"

The are both still teenagers, who have zero previous relationship experience. Also, Aang had no ill intentions and Katara recognized it.

Sixth: [refencing Katara's role in The Legend of Korra] "Did Katara want to do anything other than sit in a healing hut and be known for having Aang's kids?"

This is another argument that just pisses me off. You can not use Katara's lifestyle in her 80s (she is 85 in s1) as judgement for her adulthood. It's purely assumption based. Constantly this author assumes that because she is in a relationship with Aang, Katara would drop her whole personality. What? Katara would not and could not be forced to do something or conform to some label and Aang wouldn't let it get to that point either. He would squash any idea that she is just "The Avatar's wife" or "The mother of the Avatar's children" the minute he heard it.

Seven: [comparing Katara's reaction to Aang The Desert to Aang's reaction to Katara in The Southern Raiders] "You'll spend a long time looking for her condescending tones. "Anger won't help, Aang," Katara never said, because she got that he was processing something painful and needed to sort it out himself. This difference in behavior is something that would be really fitting for a twelve year old boy to learn and understand. There's just no indication that he ever did."

Maybe I'm remembering wrong, but I don't remember Aang being condescending towards Katara. He was offering his advice because he knew her and knew that she would regret doing what she thought was right when her judgement was clouded by anger. And guess what. He was right. He never forced anything on her, either. Sure, he was a bit more pushy than he could've been, but in the end he let her go on the trip with no complaints. He even agreed that this was something she had to do.

Eighth: [referencing The Ember Island Players] "When the actor says 'Wait! I thought you were the Avatar's girl', Aang agrees. Katara is his."

You know damn well Aang doesn't see Katara as just his. And she's give him PLENTY of reason to believe that his feelings are reciprocated (which they are).

Ninth: "It's the story of a woman who swallows everything lest the man she's interested in has to learn anything about his behavior that violates her boundaries."

Ha! You said she was interested in him.

But in all seriousness, you mentioned how Katara stood her ground and told Aang that she was confused, but apparently now she's swallowing her feeings.

Tenth: [talks about the cloud babies daddy issues]

I don't disagree with what is said here, for the most part, but I don't think it is a reflection on Aang and Katara's relationship.

Eleventh: "... given what what we got with Kataang, it's completely unsurprising that Aang and Katara's parenthood/adult life was defined by a lack of communication and availability, at least from what we can tell. This also puts Katara's choice to immediately moved to the South Pole once Aang died in perspective; perhaps the city he poured all his energy into, at the cost of his family, held some bitter memories."

Once again with the lack communication. We can't use the early years of their relationship to determine their whole relationship. Also, there wasn't consistently a lack of communication, you just pointed out one time and ran with it.

We don't know at what point Katara moved back to the South Pole, but there are plenty of reasons for Katara to leave Air Temple Island:

a) Her son moving in/or planning to move in with his family.

b) She was no longer needed in the city and thus had no need to stay.

c) She wanted to go back to her native home for comfort after the love of her life died at a relatively early age.

d) The next Avatar was discovered and she came home to train them.

That's all. Thank you for reading my unnecessary rant if you made it this far, and I just want to close out with a few things:

- There were some things in the article that I did not include for the fear of this becoming a novel of me repeating myself.

- I agree with most thing said in the final segment of the the article. Most, not all.

- I appreciate the author for not trying to shove Zutara in just because Kataang wasn't there. That is becoming increasingly uncommon, so it was nice to see.

[rootsrockweirdo]

The September issue of Honky Tonk Times is available now at thehonkytonktimes.com. This month I interviewed Mario Carboni and Norm Hamlet, who served as Merle Haggard's bandleader and steel guitar player for over 49 years. These interviews are a dream come true!

Carboni, Hamlet carry on Bakersfield tradition of music and kindness

Mario Carboni might be the nicest guy you’ve never met. From the start of our half-hour-long interview, Carboni exhibits the personality traits not of a traveling musician but of a man who genuinely concerns himself with the happiness of those around him. The 35-year-old piano and trumpet player extraordinaire is driving across Alaska in a van purchased specifically for runs in The Last Frontier. A mix-up has caused him and his lone bandmate to miss their hour-long set at the state’s largest festival. Instead of dogging the head of the event, Carboni simply says: “They’re busy. They have so many acts in there it’s understandable.” It’s not the reaction I expected, but as our conversation continues, it becomes clear that perhaps his heroes have not only influenced his music but his attitude toward life as well. A native of Oregon, Carboni’s lifelong affair with music began at 9 months old when he started playing the piano (yes, you read that correctly). By the age of 10, he added the trumpet to his repertoire. “I started out playing ragtime and improvising,” he says. “I ended up playing the trumpet in various school bands, then figured out how to play the two of them together when I was about 20. I ended up going from there, starting to play shows – I did a year of college, and it was not at all what I wanted to do – so I went over to Bakersfield and started meeting folks I considered to be my heroes and met Red Simpson in 2015.” One of the originators of “truck driving country,” Simpson rose to popularity as both a recording artist and songwriter in the mid-1960s, scoring hits such as “Roll, Truck, Roll” and “Hello, I’m A Truck.” The Bakersfield native remained a permanent fixture in the area's music scene, coming to the aid of many aspiring musicians until his death in January 2016. “Red was always helping younger folks and kids,” Carboni says. “He’d record a record with somebody in their little home studio, mention them in a radio interview or tour with them. He toured with me; he didn’t have to do that. The two of us recorded two records together; they were the last two records he ever recorded.” Following Simpson’s death, Carboni received an invitation to play at Buck Owens’ Crystal Palace, where a chance meeting with Norm Hamlet would change the trajectory of his career, forming an unlikely duo billed as “The Rebel and The Stranger.” As a member of Merle Haggard’s Strangers, Hamlet served as bandleader and steel guitar player for nearly 50 years, playing on more than 30 No. 1 hits and performing in some of the most recognizable concert venues in the U.S. Upon Haggard’s death in April 2016 and despite his age at the time, Hamlet too found himself wondering what would come next. “We were both hired to play in a band at Buck Owens’ Crystal Palace, and we started talking that night,” Carboni recalls. “I asked him if I could have his number and eventually called him up and told him I’d like to shoot a video of the two of us playing three songs; I’d pick my three favorite songs that he’d recorded on. We filmed this series of videos and put them out. I think there was one of ‘No Reason To Quit,’ another of ‘The Roots of My Raising,’ and it was really special to me because he’d played on the original hit with Merle in the ‘70s. I told him I could never afford to pay him what it was worth, and he was very nice to do that for me. “We put them out on social media and turned around a week later, and they’d hit 600,000 views each or something like that. I called him up and said, ‘Hey, this is significant. We should start a project.’ We started talking a little more about it, touring a little bit more and more dates started coming our way. It seems like the more stuff that we do, the more stuff people want to hire us for, and it just snowballed from there to the point where we’re touring the country.” For 86-year-old Hamlet, whose career began nearly seven decades ago and whose resume also includes working with Rose Maddox, The Farmer Boys, and once as part of a band opening for Hank Williams, the decision to return to the road

seemed like the natural course. “Mario had such a charisma about him,” Hamlet said. “When he played music, everybody loved his singing and playing, and I thought the same thing. It had been a long time since I’d seen a piano player that plays as good as he does, so I thought, ‘Well, I might still try to go out there and play a few things.’ This turned into a good job. At my age, I didn’t know how long I’d be able to go out and do it. As long as I can do it health-wise, we’ll keep going out there.” In addition to their busy tour schedule, the two recently completed their debut album, "Hello Heartache," a collection of 10 songs recorded aboard Carboni's tour bus, affectionately dubbed "Ol' Red," on the streets of Bakersfield. Of the 10 songs, eight were written by Carboni and Hamlet. “Most of the songs are upbeat in the Bakersfield sound, traditional style, with a slight twist of the piano being the rhythm and bass instrument instead of a traditional instrumentation,” Carboni explains. “. . . The album also features dobro played by Norm on one track called ‘Miss the Mississippi and You.’ We brought the instrument out of the museum in Nashville to record the album. The last time it was on a recording session was in 1969 on Merle Haggard’s ‘Same Train Different Time’ album.” For now, the album is only available at the pair's live performances, which Carboni says features a mix of songs made famous by some of Bakersfield's heavy hitters, including Haggard, Buck Owens, and Simpson. "They call it a second career when somebody does what Norm's doing, I guess," Carboni says. "He helps me out by playing with me; we help each other out. I get to be his rhythm section, and he lends his incredible reputation to what we're doing, and that's a really special thing, that's important." The pair has several dates scheduled for September. To view their complete schedule, visit www.honkytonkrebel.com. As for the aforementioned festival performance, Carboni and Hamlet were given a time slot for the following day, proving once and for all that nice guys don't always finish last. At least not the ones from Bakersfield.

[mxtxfanatic]

You’ve talked before about reading multiple translations of the mdzs novel. I’ve only recently seen the untamed and I’m interested in reading the novel now as well and I’m curious; what are the differences between the official mdzs translation and the exr version? I’m leaning toward reading the official version but I was curious if people preferred one or the other, I really haven’t seen much discourse about it.

Sorry, but I am not the person to ask that 😬 I didn’t mean to give off the impression that I’ve read multiple translations in full, as the exr translation is the only one I’ve read and that’s completed so far and I likely won’t read the official until it’s also completed and they fix the translation issues in it. A lot of people I trust who’ve talked about the differences seem to prefer the exr version, but only because of the aforementioned translation errors from the official, some of which seem to give a misleading understanding of characters and story themes. As for exr’s translation, before the official was announced, multiple different fan translations were beginning to crop up, and I’ve seen many people prefer those over exr (but those have since been either locked or taken down completely out of respect for the author).

A translator who goes by fanyiyi has a translation they’re working on that people have spoken highly of, though it’s again currently incomplete and you can only access it if you show proof you’ve purchased the official (last I heard). So when I talk about translation comparisons, I’m talking about comparing how exr translates certain scenes against how other fan translators have translated those same scenes, as though there’s only one complete translation, many popular scenes have been translated by different individuals on here to parse out nuance that the exr translation may have missed or that are just difficult to translate to English from the native language.

So yeah personally, with what’s currently available, I’d read both exr and the official, but I’d start with exr’s to get a better understanding of the story before jumping into the official, at least until they fix their stuff (don’t know what the status on that is with what’s been going on at 7seas). If you only want to read one, then it’s about what you prioritize since both have their critiques: get the official as money goes to the author or read exr which lacks the more egregious narrative-changing errors the official has and is complete but clunky for some.

[usergreenpixel]

JACOBIN FICTION CONVENTION MEETING 2: The Black Book (1949)

1. Introduction

Welp, here it is, Citizens.

Welcome to the second meeting of the Jacobin Fiction Convention. Please, enjoy some snacks and drinks and get comfortable because we’re in for a pretty wild ride.

The review of “The Black Book” is finally here. Initially released under the title “Reign of Terror” in 1949, it acquired its second (and more famous in our community) title during its rereleases, as far as my research could tell me.

Now, before we proceed, allow me to give you some background info on the way I found this movie.

I have seen @frevandrest ‘s posts referring to it. A few other people too, but I simply don’t remember the usernames. Still, I immediately got the impression that it’s a rather infamous movie in our community so I decided to review it simply out of morbid curiosity, just to see what the fuss was about.

I found the entire thing on YouTube so it’s available for anyone curious or masochistic enough to check it out.

Let’s just say that I dropped the movie several times and the reasons for this awful impression are going to be listed below.

2. The Story

The story reeks of propaganda, which is to be expected.

Basically, The Evil Misogynistic Gay Pigeon Boi Not Yet Dictator ™️ Robespierre wants to become, well, the dictator of France.

Problem is, apparently only Barras can appoint him as the dictator and that guy is in hiding, refusing to comply. And to make things worse, the titular book, Robespierre’s personal death list of sorts, has vanished.

Robespierre believes that he cannot control the Convention without the book and summons Duval, the butcher prosecutor from Strasbourg, to locate the death list in 24 hours. Unbeknownst to him, Duval gets replaced by one Charles D’Aubigny, who is eager to stop Robespierre...

Yes, Citizens, they attempted to make a thriller/detective story of sorts, which isn’t a bad idea. If my prompts are any indication, there’s a lot of genres that fit the setting of the French Revolution. In fact, I would love to read a good detective story set in this era.

The keyword here is ‘good’ though, and, unfortunately, this movie simply didn’t cut it for me as a detective story.

(Spoilers ahead!)

In all honesty, it’s actually quite predictable in its execution. Personally, I predicted rather quickly that the book wasn’t actually stolen and it was a distraction move.

The complete lack of logic in the actions of this Robespierre and the ridiculous levels of seriousness also were really painful to watch and kept breaking any potential immersion on my part.

For instance, Robespierre’s method of controlling the Convention is not telling who is and who is not on the list.

Now, in Real Life ™️, this hardly stopped the Thermidorians but apparently that’s not the case in the movie! Nobody even tries to speak up against him or, you know, quietly assassinate him to prevent him from getting all the power, which is hardly realistic if you ask me.

I also feel like this plot line of Charles and Madelon (the female lead) being these bitter exes is boring and really done to death. It’s actually one of my least favorite tropes and I would rather prefer them to simply have a professional relationship (because yes, men and women can have platonic relationships), like old acquaintances who went on a spying mission that one time or something similar.

This romantic subplot was really shoehorned into the story in my opinion and I do believe that it would’ve been more tolerable with only the main plot left in the final script, but oh well.

3. The Characters

Once again, boring is the best adjective I can come up with. Fouché felt less out of character than the others though, which is not a good sign.

Madelon is the femme fatale mixed with damsel in distress and Charles is the stereotypical single detective character. That’s about it. They’re both just walking clichés.

Anyway, since the OCs are kind of archetypical and blander than oatmeal without milk, let’s discuss the historical figures.

Robespierre is once again stereotypical, but I find it funny that his HQ are connected to a bakery and his scene with pigeons near the beginning is surprisingly accurate in the sense of the “he likes pigeons” tidbit. I don’t know if the creators did any research on this but it’s a nice detail nonetheless.

And now let’s talk about Saint-Just in this mess. He is ridiculously and cartoonishly evil, kicks kittens to prove it, giggles and grins like me when I write something funny in my chapters and is incredibly dumb. Also, he sounds and acts like he belongs in a Western, not in this kind of movie.

Fouché is...well, Fouché, believe it or not. Opportunistic, cruel, a backstabber and he turns on Robespierre so he is not as out of character as the others. He also makes a face similar to an owl or that “You don’t say” meme. His almost friendly banter with Charles is pretty entertaining though, I’ll give him that.

4. The Setting

The authors didn’t do their homework here properly. I’m not an expert but most outfits don’t fit that epoch and a lot of names are butchered when they’re pronounced. Danton and Marie-Antoinette in particular suffer from that, but so does SJ.

I know that the Internet was not a thing yet but it baffles me that apparently the creators couldn’t bother to consult native French speakers? Dig up information about the time period in archives? Look at portraits? Read books? You know, the usual parts of ❇️ research ❇️. Apparently, they couldn’t and it really shows.

The backgrounds are better in this department, but nothing particularly impressive here either.

5. The Acting

A+ for effort I guess. Look, guys, people trash actors a lot but I think that here they tried their best with what they had so props for that. The over-the-top acting and the extensive seriousness even made this boredom fest kind of funny to watch at times so I’m going to give it credit where credit is due.

6. The Conclusion

All in all, a pretty bad and boring movie filled with propaganda, clichés, flat characters but also occasional unintentionally funny and cartoonish moments sprinkled in.

If you’re into bad movies, I won’t stop you from watching it but I highly recommend you to do something else with your free time if you’re looking for an actually good movie.

This concludes today’s meeting of the Jacobin Fiction Convention. Stay tuned for updates, Citizens, and stay safe!

Love,

- Citizen Green Pixel

[yumeka36]

The ending of Frozen 2...a year later

I try to stay away from touchy subjects like this, at least here on Tumblr. But since @greatqueenanna @the-blue-fairie and @vuelie-frost have recently written inspiring posts on this topic (which you can read here, here, and here), I wanted to give my two cents (well, more like a thousand cents because what I thought would just be a few paragraphs ended up becoming a mini-book!)

Just to be clear, my intention here is not to argue with anyone or invalidate their feelings about the end of Frozen 2. It's quite the opposite, actually. In my view, when we're presented with a beloved hobby that has disappointed us, we have a couple of options: one is to simply stop partaking in that hobby and move onto one that brings us more pleasure (no doubt some ex-Frozen fans have done that), or keep sticking around the fandom despite constant negative feelings about it which, I can't imagine, is that enjoyable. But there's another option too: when presented with something we don't like but won't divorce ourselves from and yet have no power to change – in this case, how Frozen 2 ended – what we can change is how we view it. The fact that people who disliked Frozen 2 are still part of the fandom even a year later shows just how strong the Frozen characters and their world are…that despite dissatisfaction, fans are still not willing to give up on the franchise and leave it in favor of another fandom. And if they're not willing to give up, but still can't help feeling let down about it, I'm hoping the reasoning I present in this post can possibly offer a fresh and, hopefully, more appealing perspective. My intention here is to help alleviate hard feelings, not entice arguments.

I also want to mention that I'm only discussing the ending of the movie, specifically the fact that Anna is queen of Arendelle and Elsa is living in the forest. I've addressed most other topics of theorizing and criticism in my Frozen 2 analysis book “Seek the Truth,” which you can read here. While I did discuss the ending in detail in the last chapter, I didn't expand on it nearly as much as I will in this post.

To make things easier, I'm going to address the most common griefs about the ending one at a time and offer my input:

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Anna and Elsa were separated for 13 years so they shouldn't be separated again.

I definitely agree that it would be tragic if they were forced apart again, unable to have a relationship like they did for most of their childhood. But the more times I watch Frozen 2, the more I just don't see that in the ending. To me, a separation is when both sides are split up against their will, unable to get together again. That's not the case for Anna and Elsa. I admit the epilogue of the movie was rushed, but out of the many loose ends it could have touched on, the filmmakers made sure to include Anna's letter to Elsa about charades night, which to me shows that they want us to know that the sisters still get together regularly (that's the feeling I get from the movie; I'm not including the questionable canon of the storybooks/comics in this, which I’ll discuss a little later). We could still infer they get together even if they didn't show the letter, because we know the forest is free again and Elsa can ride Nokk to Arendelle whenever she wants. But the filmmakers chose to show the letter to make it clear that there's nothing keeping them apart.

So then the point becomes "spending only 3 years together isn't enough." What number is enough, then? 5 years? 10 years? Any number is arbitrary for a case like this. But the length of time doesn’t matter because, to me, Frozen 1 showed how strong of a bond Anna and Elsa have despite hardly ever being in physical contact…a bond of love strong enough to thaw a frozen heart. So to think that now they could never be happy unless they're physically together 24/7 does an injustice to that bond that transcends physical boundaries. They suffered because of their separation in Frozen 1 – that was a true separation, because they wanted to have a relationship but were forced apart against their wills – and at the end of the movie, they could finally have the relationship they were yearning for. And at the end of Frozen 2, not only was their love cemented further from the epic adventure they shared, but they can continue to see each other as a family as well as live out the new roles bestowed upon them. Unlike a movie with an actual separation ending, like Toy Story 4 for example, where Woody and Buzz would never be able to see each other again except by some crazy coincidence, there is literally nothing stopping Anna and Elsa from continuing to have adventures together in future stories, while also satisfying their new duties and enjoying their lives both individually and as a family. That sounds like a very fulfilling life to me.

But the "Anna sans Elsa" book proves that they barely see each other and Anna misses Elsa a lot.

This sentiment comes down to whether you want to consider the relatively few post-movie storybooks as true canon or not. I consider them loose canon at best because no one involved with the creation of the canon Frozen movies/shorts had any involvement in their development and probably even knows they exist. There's also the fact that they're having such a minimal release – just one or two European countries have been getting them, and they're not even being released in English, which is arguably Disney's largest market. There're also conflicting implications between the stories, for example, the "Anna sans Elsa" book implies that Elsa hasn't visited for a long time, but the German comic where Elsa visits for charades implies that she does visit regularly (from @bigfrozenfan‘s translation here, she says "I wouldn't have missed an evening of charades with you for anything in the world!"). Then there's the "Explore the North Book" which shows Queen Anna visiting Elsa in the forest. Just because this book isn't a story is no reason to disregard it, especially when you consider the fact that it was the first book released to show the sisters interacting post-movie, plus it was actually released in larger markets, like the US and Japan. Even Anna's letter within the movie canon itself, telling Elsa not to be late for charades, is not written in a way that implies she hasn't seen Elsa for a long time. If anything, it implies the opposite to me…that these visits occur regularly. So what we can conclude from this is that Disney's publishing branch is releasing a few post-movie stories to limited markets to make some extra earnings, but obviously the book/comic authors are restricted with the kinds of stories they can depict; as in, they can't have stories that would affect the lore and canon, like showing Elsa's role in the forest or how Northuldra/Arendelle relationships are progressing. So they're going with safe side-stories like Anna doing familiar things in Arendelle and Elsa visiting for charades – things that can be inferred from the movie's ending but don't continue the narrative past that. This could also be why these books are having such a small release. Perhaps because the English-speaking market is so large, anything brought to that market could be seen as having relevance and clout, and Disney doesn't want that for these stories (because there's really no reason to not bring the books to other markets when children's book sales are soaring thanks to the pandemic). The "Anna sans Elsa" book is even getting a re-release with new pictures, again, only in French, which to me further illustrates the limitations on post-movie stories currently going on. So ultimately, I would not take details from these books/comics that are available to only 0000.1% of Disney's worldwide market as the "word of god," especially when they're inconsistent with each other and canon implies otherwise.

Anna isn't fit to be queen.

I'm not really sure what (canon) examples there are of Anna showing traits that would hinder her ability to be a good queen, or at least not as good a queen as Elsa. Is the reason for this because of her naivete about Hans? There's no evidence that shows she hasn't learned her lesson from that…it's not like she rushed into marrying Kristoff right away. If it's something about her personality being too reckless or something, Elsa has exhibited recklessness too, doing things without forethought like running away to live alone in an ice palace and risking her life to dive into Ahtohallan. But despite having these very human flaws, Elsa still turned out to be a good queen, so why would Anna be the opposite? Anna has proven herself to be brave, noble, and outgoing with people…all of which are great qualities for a ruler. Plus she's lived among royalty her whole life, and no doubt helped Elsa during her reign as queen, so she's not going into the position as a total novice. We barely see Elsa doing queenly activities in the Frozen canon, so how can we assume she's so much more fit to be queen than Anna? Again, I think this is another sentiment that stems from an aversion to something unfamiliar: fans want Elsa to remain queen because we've been familiar with that for years, but that doesn't mean Anna can't be a good queen, too. Canon-wise we haven't yet seen Anna do anything in the way of ruling, so why not give her the benefit of the doubt and a chance to prove herself?

The first Frozen established that Elsa shouldn't live in isolation and yet she's doing it again in Frozen 2.

In the first Frozen, Elsa isolated herself out of fear and refused to even get near anyone. What evidence is there that this is happening at the end of Frozen 2? I've heard assumptions that she's living in Ahtohallan now, but we don't know that for sure. The last scene of the movie shows her heading in that direction, but she could be visiting too. But regardless of where her actual place of dwelling is now, there's no reason to believe she's shutting herself off like she did in the first movie. The epilogue shows that she's happily interacting with the spirits, the Northuldra, and makes visits to Arendelle. Home is more than just a physical place where one dwells and sleeps; even if the forest is where Elsa does this now, Arendelle is still her home in all other regards.

An offshoot notion of Elsa living on her own in the forest is that it's somehow akin to the idea that "people who are different should live outside normal society." I don't understand this because to me it implies the person in question is being shunned; that they want to live in normal society but normal society doesn't want them. That is definitely not what's going on at the end of Frozen 2. As I'll explain in the following paragraphs, Elsa stays in the forest because she feels a newfound sense of freedom and is thrilled to explore this new world she found, but she can freely go back to Arendelle whenever she wants, and there's no indication that anyone there loves her any less (they should love her more actually because they all witnessed her save the kingdom from the tidal wave!) At the end if the movie, no one's being ostracized for being "different." Everyone's doing what makes them happy and can freely come and go as they please.

Why does Elsa need to stay in the forest? Why can't she stay in Arendelle and visit the forest?

A large majority of the hard feelings about Frozen 2's ending comes from the fact that it didn't clearly show what Elsa's role in the forest is. I definitely admit that the ending would have benefited from expanding on this, even just another line or two. But to me, it still leaves enough information for us to make reasonable inferences about what she's doing. We don't see the Northuldra or Arendellians interacting in the epilogue, which makes sense since they hated each other for decades and it'll take time to mend the relationship between them. When Elsa says to Anna "we'll continue to do this together" conveys to me that she knows they still have work to do as far as making amends between the kingdoms���she and Anna can serve as dual queen ambassadors between the two sides, a bridge, so to speak. Then there's also the fact that the spirits were angry for decades and it'll take time for them to return to the peaceful coexistent they had with the Northuldra, something Elsa can certainly help with (again, we don't see the spirits interacting with the Northuldra in the epilogue, only with Elsa).

On top of that, there's the fact that Elsa spent her whole life believing she was the only magical being in the world, and now she's discovered this whole new land of magic just waiting to be explored. As I explained in my analysis book, if we consider Elsa believing for years that her powers were a curse and no one but her possessed magic, and suddenly she's brought to a place where other magical beings exist, as well as a group of people who live in harmony with them, plus the fact that she's somehow a bridge between both magic and humans, it makes sense she'd be ecstatic and want to spend time indulging in this new land. The reason she doesn't just visit the forest while living in Arendelle is because being queen is a full time job that requires her to be present as much as possible. Trying to stay on top of all her queenly responsibilities while going back and forth to the forest all the time wouldn't amount to the kind of quality she wants for Arendelle royalty. But having someone like Anna who's already familiar with royal activities and loves Arendelle with all her heart, would be perfect for the role. Elsa never indicated it was her dream to be queen of Arendelle. She was born into the role and accepted it, and if the events of Frozen 2 never occurred, would have probably lived out her life happily in that position. But happiness isn't necessarily a final destination and sometimes things come along that alter the status quo, but also enhance what we thought was already a good life. What we can infer from Frozen 1 is that she doesn't want to live in fear and have to constantly suppress her powers and that she wants to have a relationship with her sister again. None of this is taken away from her at the end of Frozen 2: she's not living in fear but in freedom, she can use her powers without restraint and in brand new ways with the spirits and Ahtohallan, and she can not only continue to see her sister often and foster their relationship, but she can grow her relationship with herself and this new realization about the origin of her powers. And still another reason, perhaps the true purpose of the fifth spirit is more than a single task and Elsa is trying to discover what it is: what more can she do with her amazing powers now that the forest is free, both for the benefit of the Northuldra, the spirits, Arendelle…maybe even the world? There's a wealth of possibilities for future stories, and I believe this ties back to the fact that the post-movie books/comics can't touch on what her role in the forest is because it's too closely tied to continuing the canon story, and until the heads at Disney decide what direction to take it, all spin-off content will be limited.

And yes, it's true that these are just my theories, but they're theories based on many hours of rewatching, analyzing, and thinking critically about the movie, which I think is better than just dismissing the idea that Elsa has a role to play in the forest simply because it wasn't explicitly shown. Just because Elsa's new lot in life isn't spoon-fed to us doesn't mean it doesn't exist, and I think it's much more logical, and imaginative, to assume she's doing the kinds of things I just mentioned as opposed to doing nothing of significance in her life now. I prefer to be logical and imaginative, so I’m going with these reasons unless canon shows otherwise.

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After reading all this, you might think I'm in love with the ending of Frozen 2 and think it's perfect, but that's not the case. While I love Frozen 2 overall, I admit that the ending was rushed and it wasn't my first choice of an ending for the sequel I was anticipating for years. But at the same time, I'm open-minded, especially in regards to the fact that the story and characters I'm invested in are not my personal creations. They’re the products of someone else’s experiences, values, and beliefs, and I have to recognize that this is what makes them interesting even though I may not agree with everything. But who am I to say that my vision and headcanons for Frozen are somehow better than those of the filmmakers? I don't think so highly of myself as being more of an authority on Frozen than the creators themselves or even my fellow hardcore fans. But I have spent many hours of my life these past 7 years examining and analyzing the franchise and its characters, so I'd like to believe my words have at least some weight to them. That's the wonder of fiction…that someone's ideas can be interpreted and appreciated in a variety of ways by a variety of people. But that's also the tragedy of fictional stories that continue on with long gaps in between, like the gap between the two Frozen movies. During that long time, we can't help but build and prop up our headcanons and develop the feeling that we know these characters inside and out, what is and isn't good for them, how they would and wouldn't react in all situations, etc,. But two and a half hours (which is about the length of time of Frozen 1 plus the two shorts) is not enough time to show so much of a characters’ personality that we could really know them as much as we’d like (especially Elsa, who got relatively little screentime in the first movie). So when we're presented with the continuation of the story and find that the creators had a different view, a view that didn't return to the status quo we were familiar with, it can be very jarring. But that's the risk of falling in love with someone else's creations. And thankfully, the beauty of headcanons is that they're all our own and can be adjusted. Even though the outcome of Frozen 2 was not what I was expecting, it was a minimal effort to adjust my headcanons because I don't feel the ending was so outrageous and far removed from everything I loved previously about the franchise, for reasons I hope I explained clearly in this post.

If you still can't feel any better about the end of Frozen 2 despite all I've discussed here, I'm sorry…I really tried my best. All I can say now is that I hope future content will rekindle your appreciation for the franchise. I know it's been over a year since Frozen 2, which seems like a long time to go without any announcements of new material, but we have to remember that that's not a long time at all by Disney standards. The recent Disney investor's meeting proves how long it takes to churn out new content, especially on the animation side of things, as it took years for Princess and the Frog, Zootopia, and Moana to finally get new content. Disney immortalizes all their popular franchises and could go back to them months, years, or even decades later (The Lion Guard series came out over 20 years after The Lion King for example). Unlike other Disney franchises like Marvel and Star Wars that have their own production teams and studios, Frozen has to share resources with all of WDAS's other projects. So a year is still too early for the studio to go back to Frozen again, especially if you consider that it's technically only been a few months since we got new Frozen content in the form of Once Upon a Snowman. Patience is the key now and we don't know what the future holds. But I'm someone whose opinions will change with new information, so maybe tomorrow we could get an announcement about a new Frozen YA novel or Disney+ series that shows Anna and Elsa rarely see each other and Anna misses Elsa and Elsa's doing nothing noteworthy in the forest and everything I've said here can be tossed out the window. I don't think that will be the case though, so as long as we don't know anything for sure, I want to go with a positive outlook because, at the end of the day, your fandoms should lift you up instead of bring you down. Frozen is a juggernaut for Disney so I'd rather they take their time with the next installment for the franchise. It's not so much a question of "if" as much as "when" and "in what form"? So until we have those answers, I wish you all well…don't let the hope die out.

[omoi-no-hoka]

Hello! I'm sorry if this has been asked before, but how do you become proficient at handling conversations in Japanese/handling grammar very well? I read your post on the JLPT, and it addressed issues I have been tip toe-ing around--indeed, passive actions such as listening or reading are easier than the active ones. How did you go about that? Did you write a bunch of sentences daily? Did you have a conversation partner? What would you rec. to someone who lives outside Japan? Thank you!

This is an excellent question, and one that I get asked a lot irl by Japanese people in particular. Let’s talk about gaining fluency and the ways we can go about it!

How to Gain Fluency in Japanese (and Other Languages)

Speaking Fluency versus Accuracy

Language proficiency is divided into two separate categories:

Fluency: Although there are no widely agreed-upon definitions or measures of language fluency, someone is typically said to be fluent if their use of the language appears fluid, or natural, coherent, and easy as opposed to slow, halting use. In other words, fluency is often described as the ability to produce language on demand and be understood.

Accuracy: Correctness of language use, especially grammatical correctness and word choice.

By the above definitions, a “fluent” speaker may make grammatical mistakes, but they can speak without having to stop and think too much about conjugations, word choice, etc.

An “accurate” speaker can speak with nearly zero grammatical/word choice mistakes. However, the speed of their utterances isn’t generally taken into account, so it could take an “accurate” person twice as long to articulate the same idea as a “fluent” person. 

Ideally, you need to strike a good balance between these two qualities when speaking. I have a boss, God bless him, who is 100% fluency and 0% accuracy and…man is it hard to understand what he’s saying sometimes, but he can generally get his point across just barely. I have another coworker who is 100% accuracy and takes about 3 minutes to form a sentence because he wants it to be perfect. 

How to Increase Speaking/Writing Accuracy

First, let’s talk about the easiest thing to improve, which is accuracy. It’s also (in my opinion) the least fun thing to improve, because it means grammar books and vocabulary memorization. 

You can only use a language accurately if you know what is correct and what is incorrect, and you can only learn that by studying grammar and vocabulary (or if you’re a native speaker and picked it up innately, you lucky bastard).

So here’s some things you can do to increase your accuracy:

For example, if you’re having a hard time using the passive, you need to review that part of your textbook and find some exercises to drill it into your head. 

Say the correct thing aloud. Lots. Sometimes I just walk around my apartment and narrate everything I see/do like a crazy person, but that’s good practice. 

Write example sentences using the grammar you’re struggling with and say them aloud too. 

There’s a bunch of cool apps that connect you with native speakers that can help correct you too! I used to use HelloTalk, I think. 

If you’re a creative soul, when I was studying for the JLPT, I took 1 grammar point and 5 vocabulary words from my JLPT study books and used them to write a 2-page short story about the adventures of ネギ, a stray black cat that smelled like green onions because she napped in an onion field. Then I had a Japanese friend check it over for me and mark mistakes. I hand-wrote them to improve my abysmal handwriting at the same time. It was really fun! I sometimes think about doing it again just for funsies.

When someone corrects you, don’t feel like your entire life is over and you’re a failure and you’ll never get it right haha. I’ve seen people fall into that hopeless mindset, and that’s just nonsense. It’s a good opportunity for learning and nothing more! Say the correct thing you’ve just been taught out loud, then write it down if you can. And, if possible, find a chance to use it in conversation asap.

How to Increase Speaking/Writing Fluency

Now this is the hard one. Especially for those learners who do not have native speakers nearby. 

I’m going to be dead honest with you. I started formally studying Japanese at uni, and I had a Japanese roommate/best friend since year one. I had a 4.0 GPA in my Japanese classes (and only my Japanese classes lol) because I was and still am a MEGA NERD about it. 

...But it wasn’t until I studied abroad in Japan my 4th year of uni that I gained fluency. 

There are a lot of things that can hold us back from fluency. An interesting thing I’ve noted is that Foreign Language is perhaps the only subject in which a student’s personality can directly affect their progress. To gain fluency, you have to go forth and speak, but if you are naturally a shy person, that is going to hinder you. If you are the kind of person who takes mistakes/failures poorly, you will be less likely to take risks and try to say harder sentences. In contrast, you can get full marks in math regardless of the above personality traits. 

I’m not saying that you have to be an outgoing explosion of a human being in order to gain fluency. But what I am saying is that you have to be willing to seek out conversations, and you have to be willing to take chances. Get out of your comfort zone. Use that new word you picked up the other day. Try to explain something that is difficult for you. 

My problem was that, while I lived with a native speaker who would have happily taught me anything I asked, her English proficiency was much higher than my Japanese proficiency. And when I struggled to say something in Japanese, I’d fall back onto English. And when she told me something I didn’t understand in Japanese, she’d repeat it in English instead of Japanese, because that was easier for us both. The same thing happened when I was in Japanese class as well. I always had the assurance that I could fall back on English.

But when I elected to study abroad in Japan for 3 months, I knew that this was my big chance. So on the host family form in the “other requests” area, I wrote that I specifically wanted a host family that could not speak English. I was setting fire to my crutches, and I was scared but excited to see them burn. 

By the end of my three months in Japan, I had gone from “Chotto matte kudasai” and needing a minute to form my reply, to “Okay, yeah I see that movie too and I liked the action scenes, but I didn’t care for the story little.” (I’ve underlined mistakes that I would have made in Japanese, to show you that I sacrificed some accuracy to obtain higher fluency.)

So, in short, the easiest and quickest way to increase your spoken fluency is to throw away all the crutches you can and use the language as much as possible. Every single day. Even if you’re just having an imaginary conversation with yourself! And like I said, there are a bunch of cool apps that connect you with Japanese people who want to learn English and you can do language exchanges with them. I had a lot of fun with those in the past. 

As for increasing writing fluency...well. That’s a tough question with Japanese, because I can type Japanese at like 100 wpm, but my Japanese handwriting fluency is at a 10/100. I can read and type at the level of a native Japanese high school student, but I can only write the kanji that 7 year old can write. That’s no exaggeration.

The big reason for that dichotomy is that my work is paper-free. 100% of my work is done on screen, so about the only time I have to write out something is when I’m filling out a form, which includes my name (katakana), address, and maybe occupation. 

If you want to increase your Japanese handwriting speed, just keep on writing. Write those little short stories about ネギ like I did, or find some writing prompts (I just started a side-blog with writing prompts yesterday btw) or keep a little diary. Make opportunities to write. 

How to Have Nice Handwriting in Japanese

Okay, full disclaimer: I am the absolute LAST person qualified to talk about this, because I have awful handwriting in Japanese. 

Unless you have prior experience with a different language that uses kanji, or you lack the keen eye of an artist, you will likely struggle to develop neat handwriting. 

Personally, I really like using this app called Japanese Kanji Sensei. It’s on Android (not sure about iOS), and if you pay just a few bucks you can make your own kanji sets and stuff. Anyways, it will show you how to write the characters prettily. It gives you a good frame of reference for what nice, pencil/pen-written characters (versus calligraphy characters). It has hiragana and katakana on it too!

I get a stylus and write out the characters on this app for the muscle memory, so my hands remember the sensation of writing a certain character. (The muscle memory is different if you only use your fingertip.) This muscle memory and repetition is how Japanese people learn how to internalize kanji as well. I really enjoy and recommend this app. I’m sure that there are others out there like it too.

Summary

TL;DR: Review your textbooks, take risks, use every resource available or make your own, and just have fun with it! 💗

[answers-of-a-pokemon-researcher]

Professor, what pokemon did you originally go on your first journey with?

Oh, those are some fond memories. When I was growing up my birth region of Johto was recovering some substantial wildfire damage, so I was sent to Kanto for my own journey when I was ten. All the Pokémon who were with me are all still alive and well, though most of them have dropped out of the battling circuit. Not that I battle much at all anymore!

My first Pokémon was Bulbasaur, on the entire boat ride to Kanto I made sure to stay wide awake so sleep wouldn’t hold me back from picking first, just to make sure I got a Bulbasaur. Turns out it probably wouldn’t have mattered as that species wasn’t as popular back then, but I wanted one bad. That Bulbasaur was old Maxwell, my first Pokémon. I thankfully have a small country home in Johto out by the Ilex Forest, but with a rather large yard so I don’t have to worry about space, and most of my Pokémon who aren’t active teammates anymore have that as a base to linger around and roam, including him. Maxwell’s a big lug and he’s really slowed down with his age now, but he’s fiercely loyal. We’ve had good fights together. The window in my study faces my yard, and old Max comes by periodically to rest his face on the windowsill and watch me write reports. He’s near the end of his life, near 70 years, but that old Venusaur has lived a good one and I’m making sure his golden years are comfortable. And that some of the... younger upstart Pokémon I took in give the old man some peace once in a while.

While camping in the Viridian Forest on my first night on the road, a Weedle crawled into my sleeping bag! I was honestly lucky to not get stung by accident thanks to the close quarters, but I figured it was a sign and took him with me. That was Hubert, my now-Beedrill, and though bug types are generally not long lived, Hubert is going on 20 now. Beedrill at their oldest tend to reach mid-thirties, so I have plenty of time with him. Hubert is my ambassador for the greatness of the bug type! Quick evolving bugs like him are often disregarded as beginner species, but he remained on my team as I collected all eight gym badges and contributed a lot. He’s pretty friendly for a Beedrill, but I’ve always made sure he was well socialized. He’s made his nest on the top of my wardrobe and always freaks out visitors because he’s so possessive of me.

In Mt Moon I got lost a lot, like, a LOT thanks to all the twists and turns, but I found a Paras on one dead end I hit. I’d always loved bugs and was in love with those big, cute eyes, so he came with. That was France, the now Parasect still wandering around my house. He’s pretty docile and usually stays inside, but as I warned before, it’s important to watch out for spores with a Parasect in the house. He was a pretty formidable battler for his calm nature, but I think he was happy to leave the battling scene. A lot of trainers who see him get concerned if he’s even alive thanks to all the misinformation about Parasect, but make no mistake, he is alive and fully alert! Lethargy is just part of the symbiotic relationship Parasect share with the mushrooms they carry thanks to a mixture of energy sharing, but most importantly, consistent exposure to sleep-inducing fungal spores.

I remember trading with a boy who was desperate for an Abra because he hated the psychic type he was given and thought it was scary. A Mr Mime! That was Marcel, and he was only 10 when I got him, not to mention most psychic types are super long-lived, so Marcel will be around for a very long time. He might not have liked Marcel, heck, most other trainers my age didn’t like him either when we were around, but Mr Mime has always been my type of Pokémon. I did contests and most prominently theater for a long time, and still do, and have been trained in clowning a lot, so I appreciate such a silly clown Pokémon! Mr Mime are great friends, they’re radically intelligent, you just have to be ready to manage such a smart and often mischievous Pokémon. Marcel has toned down the pranks now since I’ve established countless times I don’t have an appreciation for being tripped over invisible walls, but that doesn’t stop him from pestering other Pokémon sometimes. For all his troublesome behavior and a bit of a rough start with an unappreciative trainer, Marcel was a hard worker during my first journey and he never fails to make me laugh at least once a day.

Then there was Jane, an Elekid I found who washed up on the river by Rock Tunnel, probably from the nearby Power Plant. She was and still is quite the spitfire! Jane isn’t really used on the occasions I do battle, but she hasn’t been dropped from the battling circuit quite yet. I can’t bring myself to evolve her into an Electivire, though. She’s very content as an Electabuzz and I don’t see much of a reason to. Her and Marcel are a bit of a troublemaking duo but I love them both dearly. I do occasionally loan Jane out to people in need of a temporary Pokémon companion for things like trips through treacherous terrain with unfriendly wildlife. It’s good enrichment for her, which she constantly needs. I don’t think I would ever want to raise another Electabuzz, they’re far too high energy for my liking, but Jane is my special exception.

The last of my first Pokémon is actually the only one who’s still in the team I now regularly use for battling on the rare occasions I do it, but mostly for the sake of outings. Post is my Dragonite, which is probably the only Dragon type species I consider myself capable of handling. He‘s a retired mailworker, if you couldn’t guess by the name, haha! That was back when Dragonite were used much more commonly as postal service Pokemon, before breeders from Hoenn helped make the much more efficient Pokemon Pelipper more widely available outside its native region. He’s a kind and gentle soul, as most Dragonite are. There really aren’t many other dragons (besides the lovely Drampa or perhaps some Altaria) that can match Dragonite for its inherent friendly and loving nature. I use him for travel, as he does miss his delivery days, so we both win in that situation. I get a way to travel quickly for my research, and Post gets his exercise!

[brightbeautifulthings]

My Heart Is a Chainsaw by Stephen Graham Jones

"No, she can never be a final girl. Final girls are good, they're uncomplicated, they have these reserves of courage coiled up inside them, not layer after layer of shame, or guilt, or whatever this festering poison is. Real final girls only want the horror to be over. They don't stay up late praying to Craven and Carpenter to send one of their savage angels down, just for a weekend maybe. Just for one night. Just for one dance, please? One last dance?"

Year Read: 2021

Rating: 3/5

About: Jade is certain that her small, Idaho town of Proofrock is being stalked by a slasher killer. The only problem is that she's the "horror chick", a social outcast obsessed with the slasher genre, and the more she tries to explain what's happening to the local law enforcement, the guiltier she makes herself look. Positive that Letha, a new girl from the rich neighborhood being built across the lake, is the Final Girl, Jade tries to convince her of what's happening before it's too late. But getting close to Letha means giving someone else a glimpse into who Jade really is, and her secrets may be just as dark as whatever's stalking their town. I received a free e-ARC through NetGalley from the publishers at Gallery Books/Saga Press. Trigger warnings: graphic character deaths, suicide attempt, rape, pedophilia, incest, gore, racism.

Thoughts: There are quite a few things I liked about this book, and I think it will work well for most slasher fans. Jade will be easy for most horror fans to relate to, since she thinks in slasher films. They're how she sees and understands the world, not just a hobby but almost a religion, at least if we think in terms of things that save us. If you've ever been comforted by monsters or serial killers, or if horror ever gave you something to hold on to when you most needed it, then you're in this weird club with Jade and me, and I think that's really what this novel does best. It's a love letter to the slasher genre, with more references than even an avid horror fan like myself could follow.

There are other things to like about Jade. She's both gutsy and vulnerable, with a teenager's penchant for doing things that aren't always in her best interest, and I constantly wavered back and forth between ‘let's be friends’ and ‘someone please protect this child.’ (She just wants someone to listen to her talk about horror movies! For the record, I'm always available for that. Lay your nerd knowledge on me.) She's also half Native American, which brings some much-needed diversity to the slasher genre. The side characters are interesting, and I think purposely edge toward stock with the town sheriff and the Final Girl. Things are always more interesting when Jade is interacting with one of them, and it gives us the most clues to what's really happening. (That confession scene? Masterful writing.) One of the bigger flaws of the novel, for me, is that this just doesn't happen that much. Jade is a loner and spends most of her time in her own head instead of interacting with people. It's relatable and even understandable given her background, but it's pretty devastating to the character development.

In terms of setting up its own slasher plot, the book isn't quite as strong there either. I like the way the novel keeps us guessing about what's really happening. Jade isn't the most reliable narrator, and there were plenty of times I didn't trust her to interpret what was happening correctly. There are a number of people dying in ways that could almost be coincidental, and the book is constantly walking that knife's edge of tension on is there/isn't there something more going on here. While the clues are there, I didn't feel prepared for the direction Jones actually took with that, and it felt a little like he went for the shock value solution instead of the credible one. (More on that after the spoilers.) All in all though, this book is bloody good fun, and I hope they make a movie out of it. I think it would translate really well to the screen.

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS. TURN BACK BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.

Huh... Okay, I wasn't expecting the book to take a dip into the supernatural. I guess I should have been, since there's precedent in things like Friday the 13th Part 2 and A Nightmare on Elm Street, but when I think "slashers" I'm not usually thinking that there's no reason Jason Voorhees should even still be alive in these films, just that he's hacking people up with a machete. Jade touches on the subject of the Lake Witch a number of times, so I suppose it shouldn't have been a surprise that she turns up as the town killer. It felt less like the best answer to this mystery and more like an excuse to have an absolute bloodbath at the end, which is fun but sometimes hard to follow. But, whatever. It's creepy that she walks on top of the water, and I like Jade rising to her full Final Girl status. She’s a worthy addition to the ranks of Laurie and Sidney.

[ugly-anastasia]

Not Ready to Make Nice | Sinnie + Tonee

Annie takes Simba up on an invitation that he really didn’t offer her, and some other guests overhear...

@simba-bonfamille-lyons @inperfection-ashlee @foreverydinger

Date: 19 July 2021 TW: A brief (not graphic) mention of murder

ANNIE:

So... there had been a lot more behind that "Wow! Yum!" on Twitter. Honestly, Annie wasn't sure she was even supposed to be engaging with Simba. For, like, legal reasons or whatever. But she was kind of pissed at Mummy anyway for getting herself in enough trouble that she couldn't give Annie more financial help, and she also didn't really care about whatever shit had gone down between Mummy and Simba. Simba was popular and well-liked in town. Annie needed to be on his good side.

So she called the babysitter to look after the kids for an hour (their cuteness could be useful, but the risk factor of them completely trashing Simba's house was too high), stopped by the Moon Market and picked up a prepackaged steak and kidney pie, transferred it to a cute little ceramic dish, and drove over to the address she had managed to wrestle out of an old classmate. Easy.

"Hiya!" Annie said in a chipper, and very American, voice. "I was in the neighborhood and I just couldn't resist. That food on Twitter looked so yummy."

SIMBA

Simba had been cooking all day. Well, most of the day. He'd taken a trip this morning to the local mosque in NTO to deliver meat that he'd bought from the butcher's and to attend prayer with his mum. But, after that, it had been an all day cooking affair. It was holidays like these that he missed Nala most, but he was grateful for all the friends and family he did have.

He was looking forward to seeing everyone later. It was always nice how many people showed up to his Eid gatherings. The show of support from the community was always bolstering. Especially right now, with the Blackwells hanging over his head.

At first, Simba didn't recognize the voice. Or the face. (Was there something off about it? Or had it just been too long?) He had a smile on his face as he turned from chatting with Ashlee, reaching out to take the dish so that he could put it with the rest of the food, but then he recognized who it was and he stopped dead.

"What are you doing here Anastasia?"

TONY

Did Tony celebrate Eid? No. Did Tony like food, especially free food? Yes. Plus maybe he could get in Ashlee's good graces again if he just made himself available to her. It was hard seeing the lack of recognition there in her eyes but there was little he could do about it aside from just... replace it with new memories.

So he sat in Simba's house with a plate of food, on his way to make conversation with Ashlee and Simba, when he heard the voice ring out into the room.

It couldn't be...? Anastasia fucking Tremaine?! What was she doing her?!

"Uh-oh," he mumbled, glancing Ashlee's way.

ASHLEE

Ashlee both kind of hated the open invitation to the house and enjoyed it? She didn't like to seem like she enjoyed it. A lot of the time if people did come it was people she didn't know or didn't like and after socializing and eating for a bit she'd escape either to her room or out with the girls.

She was getting used to it more and more though.

At least until Simba froze in his tracks and the half smile she had on dropped as well. Bristling quickly. She didn't know who this person was but there was very few people that made Simba react like that. Infact she wasn't that sure if she had even since him not interact with a smile for someone that showed up.

And she didn't like being confused.

"Uh-oh what?" Ashlee questioned hearing the kid that walked up to them. What did he know that she didn't?

ANNIE

Great. She had an audience. One thing never changed about Swynlake: nobody could mind their own business. Ever.

But having an audience meant that everyone could see how goddamn gracefully she would handle this. Including the random-ass teenagers watching from the sidelines. Anastasia glanced at them uneasily before she put on her biggest, sweetest smile for Simba.

"Aww, you don't have to be so formal! I actually go by Annie now. Way easier to say." She winked. "But to answer your question, I had a bit of a disaster in my personal life, dunno if you've heard, and I thought I really ought to come back to my roots. Leave the big city, come back to this cute little town and reconnect with the people who made me who I am, you know? I'm so glad you threw this little party. I'd love to catch up."

Maybe those random kids could help her. "Hey there!" she said, waving. "Y'all know Simba?"

SIMBA

Simba's nostrils flared slightly and he had the horrible, irrational instinct to step in front of Ashlee and keep her away from "Annie."

It wasn't, necessarily, fair to Annie. After all, she hadn't even been in town. Already left for college by the time her mother helped cover up his father's death, but her proximity to Rodmilla Tremaine made him uneasy. He had trouble trusting lawyers these days, but he was pretty sure everything that he'd done with InterPride was wrapped up in a neat little bow.

His arrangement with Rodmilla was much less official. He would not be surprised if she'd sent her daughter to try and make amends. To soften him for her own return.

Honestly, he had no idea how much Annie even knew. That didn't make him feel any more hospitable.

"It's not a 'little party', it's Eid. A religious holiday and celebration," Simba bit out. "And this is Ashlee Tomassian, my--" Simba actually wasn't sure what to call her, considering everyone in town already knew her situation "--daughter. And her friend."

TONY

Eesh, the whole room was starting to feel tense. Tony remembered Annie from secondary and, if his memory served, she was not exactly the best companion to most of the school. It had made for some good stories but Tony wasn't sure those were the types of stories that belonged in Simba's adult home.

Now her little American lilt and smile was... unnerving. He glanced at Simba's face and then Ashlee's. Yeah, definitely not a good situation in front of them.

"She's actually a--" Tony stopped his explanation that she was a native to Swynlake both because she answered that herself and then when she turned her sights on the pair of teens.

Y'all know Simba?

Tony grimaced at the question. "Uh... Yeah.. He, uh, taught at the secondary school for a little bit and he's... um... Simba? How do you not--"

Just shut up, Tony.

ASHLEE

There were so many things Ashlee wanted to comment on.

A little party - she didn't celebrate Eid but she knew better than to call it a little party. Especially when she knew how important this was to Simba. That's after all why she was here and why she tried to learn about it.

The causality of 'y'all know Simba' Of course Ashlee knew Simba, she was insulted for a moment this woman didn't even know who she was.  How did anyone in this town not know Simba.

Her lackadaisical mannerism. For someone who put Simba on guard, that was what bothered her the most.

And not that Ashlee ever slouched but she stood taller, a cat ready to hiss. That familiar defensiveness that caused her to lash out, to fight (with words at least).

But just for a moment Ashlee's defenses fell glancing up at Simba's introduction of her. It wasn't a word they ever used but she wasn't mad at it. She softened just for a moment. But then it was back up again because who was she truly? To walk in like this.

"I don't think there's anyone in this house that doesn't know Simba." Ashlee agreed glancing at the guy trying to place his name. He was her friend as per Simba and she would keep face and go with it better to not disagree with the person you were fighting with.

ANNIE

Anastasia could sense the hostility. She wasn't oblivious. Even the more subtle callout coming from the kids. Well, fine, she thought. she would just have to kill them with kindness. After all, what did a couple of uni kids know about her?

Unless Simba talked about her. Jeez, could that be possible?

High road, Annie, she told herself.

"Riiiight, my b! Who doesn't know Simba?" she laughed, maybe a little too loudly. "Good to know you run this town just as much as ever. A regular Mr. Mayor, aren't you?" Anastasia looked around at the rest of the crew. "Allllrighty then, are we gonna hover in doorways like vampires at a cookout or should we get this party started?"

SIMBA

Simba had glanced at Ashlee, feeling weird because they'd never really discussed that and it was kind of a big thing and he didn't want her to think he was trying to replace or erase anyone in her life. It was just--he cared about her as more than a ward or a responsibility. It wasn't as easy as it was with Kiara, who was and always would be his cousin. Though their relationship was obviously more complicated that.

Yallah, this was not what he needed to be thinking about right now.

Instead, he watched this Tremaine try to take a step further into his house and he felt himself bristle.

"I think it's best if you left, Annie," Simba told her firmly, though he kept his voice low. He didn't want to make a scene, but he also did not want a Tremaine in his house. Simba had spent the last four years trying to learn forgiveness and finding it almost impossible. Not that he blamed Annie, but he had no idea what her motivations were and he would not take any risks.

TONY

Tony wondered if Anastasia had ever learned how to read a room because her current behavior pointed to no, not really.

Simba was clearly tense, a sight that wasn't common here in Swynlake, and Tony couldn't help the messy teen energy inside him that was a little intrigued by that.

What? No one ever said Tony was mature!

"Hey, Ashlee, isn't this holiday about community? I, uh, don't know if bringing bad energy in here is a good idea, do you?"

ASHLEE

Okay maybe this kid was okay, she really did need to figure out who the hell he was? Maybe in Nemo's grade? Maybe a new transfer? That was something to worry about later.

Smirking Ashlee grinned at him and then up at Annie "I wouldn't think so. I'm already feeling the mood drop in general. Instead of coming in it might be better to head out and get fresh air. Plus if *My Dad *doesn't think it's a good idea for you to stay I imagine a lot of people in here might think the same. Don't you?" She really wished she had his name at the moment that would be helpful.

Ashlee also probably didn't need to throw that title in there but it worked.  And Ashlee knew the power of words and there was nothing that this woman could say that would change her mind as long as Simba wanted her out of the house.

ANNIE

Anastasia looked from Simba to his two little minions and back to Simba. Well. She had at least expected him to be polite, maybe a little passive-aggressive. So the comments caught her off guard, and for a moment, Anastasia's jaw dropped.

But just as quickly, she put on that same sugary smile as ever.

"I'm not gonna lie, I'm mighty hurt. I guess I got a little too used to southern hospitality," she said, then giggled in that tinkling tone of hers. "Y'all enjoy the pie, alright?"

SIMBA

Simba, honestly, wished that Ashlee and her friend weren't here. If they weren't, he could've handled this a lot more firmly. Told Annie exactly why she wasn't welcome. Made it clear that if she approached his husband or Ashlee or any one else in his family, or went snooping around InterPride, he would make it his business that she left Swynlake as soon as possible.

Also, he didn't need kids sticking up for him and getting caught in the crossfire. He remembered how cruel and cutting all the Tremaines could be with their sharp tongues. Simba had underestimated them for petty once before. He wasn't going to do it again.

This also meant that her smile caught him off guard, some of his anger deflating. He hated when people messed around with people like this. It made him feel like he'd overreacted, or was making things up.

Also, he was pissed that he couldn't enjoy the fact someone had called him Dad and meant it. (Kiara used to do it, but mostly as a joke.)

His eyes stayed hard. "I'm sorry you feel that way," he said, his voice betraying that he didn't feel that sorry at all. "Ashlee, go put the pie on the table, please. I'll escort Annie out."

TONY

Tony couldn't stop his own grin from spreading at Ashlee's quick and sharp tongue coming out. It felt like forever since something like this had happened.

This wasn't to take away from the clearly strong familial moment that was happening with the pressure of this situation but Tony felt like it was probably better not to focus on that given... not his circus not his monkeys, you know?

"Someone was real quick to forget how Swynlake works," Tony chuckled at Annie's confession of feeling slighted. "I can help you with that, Ashlee."

ASHLEE

Poor thing. Not.

"Someone was real quick to forget they are not entitled to someone's forgiveness or hospitality." Ashlee agreed daring Annie to say something about it for just the second Ashlee had left in this conversation while she took the dish from Simba. If only they could just toss the food but that wasn't what Eid was about. So fine she would put it on the table.  "Bye bye Annie."

Nodding her head for the guy to follow with her.

With just enough distance. "Sorry what's your name again?

ANNIE

This was going to be a lot harder than Anastasia had thought. Maybe she had jumped in too quickly. Maybe she should have started out small, rather than chasing down the lion's den (heh) from the start. Anastasia didn't get it. Should she not have made the vampire joke? These Gen Z kids were so particular about that stuff nowadays...

Or maybe it was just that they trusted Simba.

She waited for the kids to leave before narrowing her eyes at Simba. "Simba Lyons, I have been nothing but pleasant and kind to you," she said simply. She wasn't going to beg for him to let him stay. Anastasia had a little bit of pride left. But she felt the need to point that out. "I'll be going soon, I promise, but we really can't let bygones be bygones?"

TONY

Tony snickered as he stood from his seat. Honestly, he'd missed being a petty teen sometimes. Stretching his Mean Kid Energy for just this moment felt refreshing.

When was the last time he'd gotten in a fight? Had it been Phineas? Damn, that had been awhile.

"Later, Annie!" He called over his shoulder as he fell into step behind Ashlee. His heart gave a pang at the question despite knowing it was coming.

"Tony, Tony Rydinger. I'm an upper sixth form."

ASHLEE

That made sense and why Ashlee didn't really recognize him. She wouldn't if she was about two years ahead of him.

"Ashlee Tommassian. Though it sounds like you already knew that. Thanks for jumping in and helping there. I don't really know the story but if she pissed off Simba, she deserves whatever she's getting." Ashlee mused setting the dish on the table among the many many other dishes. "Did you want to grab something or maybe try to listen in some more?"

SIMBA

"It's Bonfamille-Lyons now," Simba corrected her swiftly.

He kept his body blocking her from being able to walk off the dias. Simba didn't often use his larger frame to intimidate. He knew that he was tall and broad and that he could easily look threatening to others. (Not to mention how some people might just assume it based on the color of his skin.) He always walked tall and proud, but his movements were always loose and easy.

They weren't now. He was drawn up to his full height, shoulders straight and lowered. His arms were crossed over his chest.

"And no, we can't. I would prefer if we just stayed out of each other's way, if you are planning on being in town for an extended period of time. And stay away from Ashlee and my husband. And especially my mother. She doesn't need any reminders about what your mother did." He kept his voice low, away from prying ears.

He didn't do this for Anastasia either, but because he didn't want everything that had happened dragged back up. His failures, how blind he had been, how easily manipulated.

TONY

"Right, uh, you're friends with Nemo and Ian. Ian's my roommate." He explained swiftly. It was the easiest way to wave away the odd fact he knew about her. He had connections.

"It's nice to actually meet you, though. They both have a lot of nice things to say about you." He glanced at the food on the table then shook his head. "I mean, I definitely wanna find out what Simba and Annie are doing out there. She's gonna be a menace I'm sure!"

ASHLEE

Ashlee nodded at the names, for a moment she actually felt bad she didn't know him or even of him, after all if he knew Nemo and Ian, the latter enough to live with him. Then again Ian was friends with Eilonwy and Ashlee was still struggling on her insistence of being friends. It made her bristle feeling like Eilonwy wanted something more. That her kindness was fake.

At least Tony had a little mean streak in him.

"They better or they would get an earful from me for spreading lies." Ashlee grinned. "If we want to be sneaky it's best to head around the back and just listen from the side of the house."

ANNIE

Anastasia couldn't keep this up much longer. It was so much easier to fight with people online like this, where they couldn't see your face, or to fight with the other moms at playgroup back in Nashville. At least everyone had the sense to pretend like they were being nice while, underneath, they wanted to rip you apart.

But there was only so much of Simba's direct approach that Anastasia could take.

Her voice dropped a few octaves, and her old accent crept in slightly as the facade dropped. "You leave my mother out of this. You and your little company already succeeded in ruining her life, so you don't need to go ruining mine, too by turning this town against me." Anastasia stuck her chin in the air stubbornly, her expression shifting to an ugly scowl. "Fine, though, I'll stay out of your way. But I would appreciate if you would have the decency not to humiliate me in front of the children. Seeing as I'm not going anywhere. I live here now, and I'm going to get my life back. You're not getting in the way of that.”

TONY

Tony nodded, glad to follow Ashlee's lead. It was nice not to be the one in charge of a situation. He'd been befriending way too many introverts as of late. Spending time with Ashlee and her friends was a whole different experience to what he was dealing with here.

"Oh Ian's anything but untruthful," Tony chuckled. "Perfect. You show me the way and I'll keep quiet. I feel like this town is so boring sometimes for drama."

ASHLEE

It had been a long time since Ashlee had snuck around. Unlike her old home Simba and Berlioz gave her the freedom she needed as long as she was vocal with them and she was, never feeling the need to not be. Anything she asked or brought up they listened. Even if it was far inbetween. And she was still nervous to do so.

"You're not making the right type of friends if you're looking for drama. Secondary has probably gotten much duller as of late."

But that didn't mean she wasn't good at it. Quick and light on her feet and everyone was busy talking to really pay attention to two kids slipping out the back.

TONY

"You're telling me!" Tony sighed wistfully. "Honestly might need to stir some shit myself if I want to stay awake in school this year," Tony complained.

This was something he couldn't really complain to Ian about because his more soft-around-the-edges friend was not the type to understand this feeling.

He leaned close to the wall as they both headed to where they could snoop on the feuding adults in peace. He winked over at Ashlee conspiratorially.

SIMBA

Ah, there it was.

Simba didn't feel even a little bad, In fact, he was relieved that she was showing her true colors. It made all this so much easier for the both of them.

"I won't get in the way of it as long as I don't have any reason to," Simba told her. After all, he could recognize that Annie might have had nothing to do with everything. She had been young when Mufasa had died. Hardly even an adult. And it wasn't like Rodmilla to involve her precious daughters in her criminal dealings.

"But let me make one thing extremely clear: your mother ruined her own life when she knowingly covered up a murder, so don't blame me for her moral failure."

ASHLEE

Ashlee settled herself against the corner of the house, she didn't need to turn around to know Simba's voice though for a moment she did think she needed to double check he was the one talking.

She knowingly covered up a murder? Ashlee mouthed to Tony. What the fuck had actually happened, who covered up what and were they in jail was the important piece.

TONY

Tony's eyes widened at the words. Honestly he had some... guesses... but also this was Swynlake and shit happened all the time so trying to guess who was murdered seemed like rushing to conclusions.

He shrugged at Ashlee, just as confused and concerned about what could be happening.

ANNIE

Jeez. Well. If Simba was going to just put it out there like that, Anastasia wasn’t going to hold back either.

She didn’t like the word “murder.” It was so dramatic.

“She did what she had to do,” Anastasia said vaguely, because she wasn’t sure if people might overhear and wouldn’t that be the final disappointment, for Anastasia to land Mummy in jail. How fitting. And... Anastasia didn’t really know the details anyway. But corruption and scandal was part of the Tremaine family history, like any other core value. “You don’t know what it’s like to be her. Or me, for that matter. Life isn’t all sunshine and roses, and sometimes when an opportunity presents itself, you gotta take it. And I’m sorry people got hurt, but that’s... life.”

Not exactly the idealistic, cheery image Anastasia put forth online. But cynicism didn’t rake in the money or influence the way her optimistic go-getter attitude did.

ASHLEE

Ashlee actually felt like she was going to be sick. To speak so casually of murder, to chalk it up to that's life it reminded her too much of her own Dad. Who cared about who was hurt if it meant the end result was what you wanted.

And maybe that was hypocritical of her considering her own past and her part in what she had done with the girls but this was just frightening. But there was a difference, Ashlee at least liked to think there was a difference, she wasn't as bad at this woman. (Who sounded different? Was that in her head?)

SIMBA

Simba's hand clenched into a fist by his side. He felt his anger spike--a wild thing inside of him, so loud it was almost frightening. It made him want to reach for a drink. Thankfully, there wasn't any inside and he couldn't disappear from his own party.

Besides, he wasn't going to break his sobriety streak for a Tremaine.

Nor was he about to get in a physical altercation on his door step. Though, he wanted to. No doubt.

How could she--

That's life? People got hurt? His father had been murdered. Taken away from him and he had blamed himself for years because of Annie's mother. She had ruined his life just as much as Taka had.

"Get off my property," he snapped at her, his voice rising up enough that he was sure people through the open door behind them could hear it. He refused to shout, but it wasn't far off.

He had plenty of more choice words for Anastasia Tremaine, but it was a holy day and he had a family and friends and community to celebrate. Even if this conversation had put him in a black mood and he just wanted to go upstairs and lock himself in his room.

TONY

Tony felt anger flare in his own chest at Anastasia's words. He couldn't imagine anyone saying that that was just life. Excusing literal murder! He thought back on anything he knew of Anastasia or her family. In truth he had paid little attention to the girl in secondary and now he was seriously regretting it if he was missing this information.

This can't be happening, right? He mouthed to Ashlee. Tony couldn't help but feel a little frightened. If they were dealing with someone that unhinged was it wise to leave Simba alone with her? Was it wise to be eavesdropping on her?!

ANNIE

Anastasia knew Simba hated her family’s guts. But she only knew it in a vague sense. All the shit with Taka had gone down while she was back in Nashville, and it had only affected Anastasia in the sense that now Mummy couldn’t take the whole family on vacations to Nice and Aruba and Switzerland anymore because of her stupid new nonprofit job. The way Anastasia saw it, the details didn’t really matter, but the reality was that Simba had taken something from her that she believed she was entitled to.

But Anastasia wasn’t good in confrontations the way Drizella was. Anastasia’s style of fighting was subtler, quieter. If Drizella were here, maybe she would have a cutting line or a scary threat. All Anastasia had was her practiced ability to shut down her feelings.

She took a step back and stared at Simba, nodded, and then smiled. “Enjoy the party,” she said, the twang returning to her voice. “I’ll see y’all around.”

And with that, Anastasia turned on her heel and returned to her car, hoping Simba didn’t notice the slight tremble in her gait.

ASHLEE

Ashlee wished she didn't know, she wished she could have gone on believing this was some stupid petty drama, it was as simple as a 'my fam doesn't like this person so i don't like this person'. But this ran so much deeper than she could have thought.

Shaking her head Ashlee struggled to form words. I don't know but we should go. it was just go where? Simba would come in soon, Where was Berlioz, hopefully he could help Simba cause that was heavy and Ashlee was not the one with the ability to help. They could escape to her room? Yeah that was probably best. Grabbing Tony's hand she pulled him back toward the back door and swiveled up the stairs quickly. "What the hell was that????"

TONY

Oh his head was reeling at this whole experience. He blinked when Ashlee grabbed him but allowed the tug to lead him inside once again. He hadn't been to her room in Simba's before so it was somewhat of a jarring moment of him realizing this was a big deal.

"I don't know! I knew she was from Swynlake and her family had some beef with people but not that!" He admitted. "She was known as kind of a bitch but not a murder-excusing bitch!"

ASHLEE

Ashlee didn't even know what to say, she really wished they hadn't done that. It kind of gave her the creeps and it was way too close of a comparison to her Baba for her.

"We can't say anything. We don't know what the hell any of that meant or how it effects Simba." Tony better not open his mouth and spill unless they knew more.

TONY

Tony took a deep breath to try to steady himself. When he had said this year was going to be boring he hadn't considered finding out about literal murder. And now Ashlee was expecting him to keep this between them?!

"Jesus, yeah, I get it. What are we gonna do, though? Are we just, what, waiting to find out what's going on?" He shook his head. "You okay?"

ASHLEE

"Nothing, Whatever that was is old and dark and does not need to be touched by us." Maybe not even that old considering she was maybe Simba's age. But she knew they knew too much. Maybe she would find out from Simba at some point, or maybe not but she wasn't letting Tony in much. What she knew was that Simba was good and she trusted his judgement on whatever the hell that was. 

TONY

Tony frowned at Ashlee's words. It seemed like the sort of response that was, well, responsible and adult... and Tony, despite all of his efforts, wasn't really either of those things. He wanted to investigate, wanted to do something to get to the bottom of.

"I... guess so... I mean.. I s'ppose we're still... young." Don't think about how long you've been on Earth, Tony. "Jesus.."

ASHLEE

"It's not about being young, it's about getting involved in whoever covered a murder. I'm a performance major, you're a secondary kid. We're not equipped to handle that. And I already went through one shit storm involving the courts. I sure as hell don't want another. Not to mention Heresay, the fact we don't have the whole story and its not like we can just walk up and ask someone." Maybe she could, but she didn't think she had a right. "It's not like I believe Simba is part of a massive cover up." (Hopefully) "So it might already be dealt with, you know." 

TONY

Tony didn't like the response, didn't like the way he knew Ashlee was right. He took another steadying breath because, really, she was entirely correct. They were kids despite... every complicating part of Tony's life and curse.

"Yeah, right, of-of course.. Yeah, um, Simba's resourceful and-and powerful... If he had any way of settling this he would. We just gotta... trust the adults." Sure, that wasn't Tony's strong suit but he could try. "Are you okay, though? Like, is there.. anything I can... do for you?"

ASHLEE

Ashlee really hoped it was as simple as it was already taken care of. She really really did. Flopping down on her bed Ashlee sighed covering her eyes. No more spying for her. It wasn't worth it, if this was the outcome. Especially considering she didn't know if she could hid it on her face when she eventually faced Simba.

"It's fine I'm fine. we should just wait a few and head back down. Worse comes to worse they think we're making out or something up here." Which no but it was the lessor of a few evils right now.

TONY

"Gotcha..."

Tony sat down on the floor beside the bed so he wouldn't crowd her. This was ridiculous. Swynlake constantly churned out so much drama! He supposed he shouldn't be freaked out but it was.. jarring.. to see people he'd gone to school with involved in such heinous things.

"Well I would hope Simba has more faith in you than that," Tony laughed softly, a little forced. "But I can see where the concern comes."

ASHLEE

"Probably if only cause I've had a few dates with Michael since prom." And Ashlee was not the cheating kind or even had enough people she was interested in anyway.

Ashlee sighed looking up at her ceiling. Did she ask Simba or not was the question now.

[erekiosuncreativeideas]

The Guilt Imprisonment - Chapter 01

Summary : "Guilt really was an awful feeling. Lurking in the darkness, always waiting for the worst moment to attack its host, this terrifying emotion could have so many destructive effects on one’s mind. The damage was even worse if said person’s mental health was already in bad shape after hundreds of years passed in absolute isolation.

Other factors could play a role in that as well and, for Moonjumper, it was mostly jealousy, hatred and resentment. All of them had been directed towards one particular person: his other half. While the latter had managed to escape from Vanessa’s basement, Moonjumper had woken up in this nightmarish dimension, one he ended up calling the Horizon."

Moonjumper feels extremely bad about his past actions. His mind cannot help but remember them constantly, trapping him in a prison of guilt. However, he learns that he's not the only one feeling that way...

Also available on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/24665326/chapters/59601370

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Guess the sequel of "Reliving An Old Nightmare" is here ! Hope you'll like it !!

If you haven't read "Reliving An Old Nightmare", I highly suggest you do so before starting this one, as you'll probably don't understand this story otherwise. If you like this story, please don't hesitate to tell me !

Also, English is not my native language, so there might be some grammatical mistakes I'll need to correct. Don't hesitate to tell me about them if you find one !

Happy reading !

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Chapter 01 - A New Beginning

Guilt really was an awful feeling. Lurking in the darkness, always waiting for the worst moment to attack its host, this terrifying emotion could have so many destructive effects on one’s mind. The damage was even worse if said person’s mental health was already in bad shape after hundreds of years passed in absolute isolation. Other factors could play a role in that as well and, for Moonjumper, it was mostly jealousy, hatred and resentment. All of them had been directed towards one particular person: his other half. While the latter had managed to escape from Vanessa’s basement, Moonjumper had woken up in this nightmarish dimension, one he ended up calling the Horizon.

He had never been good with names. Coming up with one for this place had been quite hard, given how desert and empty it was. After all, this dimension was just a seemingly infinite void, white everywhere, with small floating islands. Some of them were bare of any element, others had trees and bushes, while certain were full of rocks.

However, only one had a magical pond, and it was the one he was on most of the time. Now that he had gained the ability to float rather than having to crawl on the ground, he had been able to explore the Horizon, discovering what the other islands had to offer. Well, the answer was “not much”, though it was still better than being restricted to a single island. Considering the infinity of this place, Moonjumper tried to use his strings to connect the islands together, as a way to find his way around. It was like a giant map, where he had to follow the strings and their directions to find back his original island. Most of the time, it worked pretty well! Other times… The ghost had to search for it for what seemed hours to him.

Well, time couldn’t be measured here anyway.

His inability to find good names could also be seen in the way he chose to call himself. After coming to hate his other half and what the latter had become, the undead spirit didn’t want to have anything to do with him, and that also covered the person they both used to be. Thus, just like his other part did with his own name, Moonjumper thought of another identity he could use. The process had certainly not been easy and he had had to see which name fitted him the best, which one made him the most comfortable. He had tried to find something related to one of the things he liked the most and, eventually, the name Moonjumper came to him.

The Moon had always been something he had loved, watching it at night. Some people loved to stargaze but, as for him, he always had prefered to admire the beauty of the Moon. Choosing a name based on it seemed like a good idea and he had liked the sound of it.

And then, an opportunity had presented itself to him, an opportunity to leave this cursed place. Moonjumper had not hesitated a single second, manipulating Vanessa during her sleep to contact her. If he had to be honest, he wasn’t even sure how he did that, even to this day. It was before the Time Piece affected his body, his appearance and gave him his… Abilities. But maybe he already had gained some powers after his death, but wasn’t aware of it. Even today, the ghost still didn’t know. What he did know at the time, however, was that a small child had fallen from the sky in the mortal plane… A hatted little child, who had brought with her a lot of powerful artefacts, some sadly lost in Subcon Forest…

All he had had to do afterwards was to find someone desperate enough to listen to him. Someone easy to manipulate, someone who would do anything if promised the impossible… And soon, a plan had appeared in his mind. It was flawless! He had passed so much time planning everything so it would be perfect, so he would finally leave and get his revenge at the same time! What a wonderful opportunity!

Except it wasn’t. Because he had killed a kid in his attempt to get free.

Leaning on a tree, back in the Horizon, he closed his eyes. A lot of things had changed since then and, one of the biggest difference was that he was now able to go in and out of this dimension as he pleased. The spirit’s face winced as he remembered the scene. So much blood, so many tears and cries, the little girl’s body sliding against the ice as gravity pulled her body closer to the floor… It has been so awful, so horrible… And something the ghost had never wanted to do in the first place.

… Well, this wasn’t entirely true. He did try to kill her once, shackling her in the cellar, next to his unconscious other half. The truth was that, even if he had considered her as a threat to him because of her magical hats and knowledge regarding other dimensions… Moonjumper was not a killer. Contrary to his other half who had named himself The Snatcher, the spirit had never killed anyone voluntarily, let alone a child. When he had to get rid of her… He had chickened out, unable to murder her. All he had been able to do at the time was to lock her somewhere, hoping the collapsing rift would kill her instead, taking away the dirty work off his hands.

And it had been the same with Snatcher and Vanessa: it had all been hot air, bluff, lies, empty threats! Anything so he wouldn’t have to kill them himself. Using the hatted child as a hostage had given him the perfect escape scenario! Snatcher and Vanessa hadn’t been able to attack him while he was holding the little girl, just like he had planned. However… He hadn’t planned said kid would risk her life to get free. When the spirit had pushed her away, trying to avoid her attack… He had never meant to kill her. It had all been a huge accident!

The ghost curled up, taking his head into his hands. He could feel the sensation of his claws scratching his head, leaving marks as he brought them down. It made an awful sound. Silence was everywhere around him, making his thoughts even louder in his mind. Guilt was an unbearable feeling. Every day, every hour, every minute, every second… This was all he could think about: how he had murdered an innocent kid.

It hadn’t been a definitive death, but still.

After his other half broke the Time Piece, he had woken up in the attic, just like he was before being teleported outside the Rift. Next to him were the unconscious bodies of Snatcher, Vanessa and… The hatted kid’s. Since there hadn’t been any ice pillars in this version of the attic, the child had been lying on the floor, safe and sound. A sudden wave of relief had engulfed him as he had realized that she was still alive. He had tried to float closer, wanting to be sure, though Vanessa had woken up, trying to attack him.

He barely escaped that day.

The spirit had been free since then. Yet, he didn’t feel like he deserved this newfound freedom, especially because it had happened thanks to a child’s -temporary- death. Eventually, he had learnt that his body had been much more affected by the Time Piece than what he first thought.

First, the ghost was now alive and dead at the same time. It was extremely weird to him, in a lot of ways. One of them was that he could feel and smell things, contrary to his other half, who apparently couldn’t. Another one was that, while he didn’t need to eat, he felt the need to sleep. He could also feel pain, though he wasn’t able to heal his injuries, the ones caused by Snatcher. The latter had ripped the Time Piece out of his ribcage, breaking bones and bruising some organs in the process. Now, some time had passed since then, probably a few months from what Moonjumper had been able to tell, but… His body had remained unchanged, still as damaged as before. Since he didn’t have any healing magic, the only thing he could do was tying his chest up, in order to keep it closed. He had thought about closing it definitely by sewing his own skin, but… The very idea made him extremely uncomfortable. Considering he could feel pain now, this was not something he wanted to do. Thus, he had chosen the least painful solution, hoping that one day he’ll have the courage to do more than this.

He knew he wouldn’t, though.

The spirit let out a huge sigh and lifted his head back up, his eyes reexamining his surroundings: nothing ever changed in this place, it always remained the same. Just like him, in the end.

Moonjumper materialized several red strings, tying them between his fingers as he started to draw forms with them, mindlessly playing as his thoughts kept on wandering.

He couldn’t say he liked going back to the Horizon. Yet, even if he now had the possibility to leave and explore the world he had yearned so much… It was -oh- so overwhelming. The mortal plane was so lively, so noisy, so full of sensations he had lost the habit of feeling… At first, Moonjumper had been so happy to leave the Horizon, but soon his senses had been submerged, hit by a wave of sensations he had forgotten the existence.

Plus… There were a lot of people staring at him, judging him from afar… But who could blame them? It wasn’t every day one could see a literal living corpse! Though, all those stares and scared glances made Moonjumper feel even worse about himself. His new appearance was a reminder of what he did, of the bad things he had done just to be free… Of the death of an innocent child. It was too much.

Eventually, he couldn’t help but come back to the Horizon, where it was calm, where there was no one else but him, where no one would judge him. He did that very well on his own anyway. He still liked to leave this place, of course! Just… Not too long and only when it was late in the mortal plane. In that case, there wouldn’t be too many people staring at him.

It was really ironic! He had wanted to be free, to get out of there so much… And now, he was trapped again, trapped by his own loneliness. He did try to talk to people, but most of them were either scared or really uncomfortable by his presence. In the end, his situation was even worse than before. Yes, he could leave, but now his inability to socialize was his own fault. When he was stuck in the Horizon, he had his other half to blame for that… Now, he had no one else to blame other than himself.

It was a very different matter.

Moonjumper made the strings disappear and he stared into space. He needed to take his mind off all of this. Maybe a walk at night would help him? It had been a long time since the last one. He had been focusing on staying outside longer and longer. The mortal plane was overwhelming, but it was becoming easier to bear all those new sensations. It was a slow process, but it was progress nonetheless.

The ghost lifted himself from the ground, using his new floating abilities to move. He flew higher and higher, getting farther off the island he was on. Then, he extended his hands in front of him, grabbing empty space with them. But there was still something, even if it wasn’t visible. Clenching his teeth, the spirit started pulling the reality apart, separating it with his hands as he tried opening a window to the mortal plane. It was hard, and Moonjumper could feel his arms getting tired quickly at how difficult it was. But, after a few seconds, he managed to open a passage. The sight of a city greeted him, a town plunged into the darkness of the night, with no one outside. It was apparently a calm city surrounded by water, with tall buildings. An island, perhaps? But it mattered little to the ghost: all he wanted was to go on a stroll without catching anyone’s attention.

And this place seemed perfect for that. Before leaving his dimension, he examined the city once more, smelling the sea air as he passed his head through the crack. It was a messy town, with garbage and graffiti everywhere. There were a lot of scaffoldings, as if the city had gone through major changes. Many crates were scattered around. There was a beach, though it seemed just as messy as the rest of the island. Several hot-air balloons were settled on the sand, all empty. A huge geyser was coming out of the centre of the town, holding up a sort of platform on which could be seen a building.

Moonjumper let a small smile appear on his features, something he barely did nowadays: this was going to be a promising stroll, he thought, as he entered the new dimension, the crack slowly closing behind him.

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Hope you liked that first chapter ! :D

See you soon on the next chapter ! Take care in the meantime !

=> Chapter 02

[melancholydreadfuldream]

Dreamer File 07

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing: 13th Doctor x Reader

 Summary: The Doctor and fam found themselves in a dangerous place. The Doctor met a former companion who is supposed to be dead.

 Warning: ooc, angst, plot holes as usual, mention of violence, death, a possibility of dark!doctor.

 More warning: English is not my native language and I suck at it but I wanted to write for DW so please pardon the mess.

 A/N: I'm running out the fuel to write fanfic. I wanted to make a short and to the point fanfic with specific scene that I want to write but I kept driving myself with madness about how to fit the puzzle for the beginning and ending and then I ended up not writing at all. I thought about postpone posting this fic at least until I could start and finish one more fic but like I said I'm running out the fuel to write. It's weird because I finally have some time for myself due to the lockdown and for the life of me, I couldn't apply my butt to chair and write. I suck at this. Ugh!

    The Doctor had no idea what happened. She and the fam were on one of their routine adventure when thing got wrong very quickly. As usual, they ran into trouble and the Doctor intended to fix it. But, of course, the random villains of the weeks were unhappy of the Doctor's interference. Next thing they knew, they were sucked into a mysterious portal.

 The Doctor and the fam woke up in some woods in the middle of nowhere. With the Tardis out of reach, the Doctor had no choice to explore the woods in hope to get some help and explanation about their current whereabouts.

 They saw a young man and woman from a distance and they stupidly called out to them.

 "Oh, look at that. Newcomers." The woman glanced at them with a sinister smile. She got a gun and armed with knives.

 "Hello, there. I'm the Doctor. And they are my friends, Yaz, Ryan and Graham." The Doctor explained once they were within hearing. "We got lost, you see, and we would appreciate it if you can..."

 The woman shot at Ryan right at his stomach before replying coldly, "don't care."

 Ryan looked shocked, his mouth hanging open. He looked down at his injury before he lose his footing and fell to the ground.

 Yaz quickly tried to catch him and lessen his fall.

 Graham is frozen, unable to comprehend what just happened. When he regained his bearing, he quickly bend his knees near Ryan.

 Yaz tried to stop the bleeding but she knew his injury is fatal.

 The Doctor is enraged that her companion is injured. "Why would you do that?!"

 Yaz screamed at the Doctor to help with Ryan's injury. "Doctor, do something!"

 Graham hold Ryan's bloodied hand as the young man looked up at him as if he want to say something but couldn't.

 The man pulled out a sword from his person and grinned. "I love newcomers." He walked toward them threateningly.

 The Doctor quickly used her sonic screwdriver to throw his sword away from him before returning to fuss over Ryan's injury.

 The man looks annoyed but also amused. "Interesting choice of weapon." he said.

Yaz and Graham started sobbing as Ryan wheezed some more before he stopped breathing altogether.

 The Doctor froze in her helplessness as she just watched her companion got killed right before her eyes.

 "It's not fun when they don't run." The woman said, stopping the man. "Run, newcomers, run. The others are coming and you lot are fair game."

 The Doctor glared at them coldly but when she realized what the woman is saying, she quickly grabbed Yaz and Graham to run despite their reluctance to leave Ryan's body.

 7777

 The Doctor realized the woods is a place of hunting and they are the prey. If what the woman said was true, there are others, most likely armed and they won't lend a helping hand to them either.

 They finally found a hiding spot after a long while. Yaz and Graham were still shocked from the sudden loss of Ryan. The Doctor walked back and forth, wrecking her mind for a way out of the cursed place.

 Graham finally snapped and he said he wanted to avenge Ryan's death. Of course, the Doctor quickly tried to talk him out of it. Yaz insisted that they have to find weapon defend themselves against whoever come next at least.

 They had to leave their hiding spot when they heard a group approaching nearby. The woman who killed Ryan was not with the group. But, the Doctor overheard them talking about how Maeve managed to nail one of the newcomers. Now, the Doctor know the name of the woman who will unleash the wrath of the oncoming storm. But, for now, she reign in her temper and focused to keep Yaz and Graham out of harm way.

 The Doctor instructed her remaining fam to follow her and to be super quiet to get around the group. However, unfortunately, Graham accidentally missed a step and make a noise that alert them to their presence.

 "Run." The Doctor ordered.

 They barely able to dodge bullets and arrows that sorta rain down on them once the group are aware of the prey within their reach. Yaz got separated from the Doctor and Graham in the process.

 The Doctor is at least relieved that Yaz with her police training might be able to maneuver her way out of danger. Now, her focused is on the grieving Graham. He still wanted revenge and the Doctor know he will be reckless about it when next they meet Maeve.

 However, a man managed to get the drop on them and took Graham hostage. The Doctor tried to reason with the man who held a knife on Graham's neck. But there is no reasoning with the man, the Doctor realized in horror, for the man is insane with the lust to kill.

 Graham was helpless as he stared at the Doctor in fear as he could feel the knife inches away from his neck.

 A shot was heard and the man was shot right on the head dropped dead.

 The Doctor's eyes widened in shock at the dead man before her before looked up to see a figure in red hood a few feet behind the man and Graham.

 Graham touched his neck in relief before weakly reached out toward the Doctor. His body is trembling in fear mixed with shock.

 The figure in red hood put down the gun and walked toward them.

 The Doctor stood in front of Graham protectively.

 The figure pulled down the hoodie revealing a young woman underneath. "Come on, newcomers, let's get out of here before the rest of them come."

 The Doctor's eyes widened again in disbelief. "(N-Name?)"

 (Name) glanced at the Doctor in confusion. "How do you know my name?"

 The Doctor look confused. "Are you really (Name)? (Name) (Last Name)?"

 (Name) frowned. "Do we know each other?" she asked. "Never mind. We need to leave. Now. Follow me if you want to live." She ordered before turning to leave them.

 The Doctor grabbed Graham and made to follow her.

 Graham was quiet the whole way. He didn't even bother to ask how the Doctor know their saviour.

 "I came here with another friend, Yaz, she got separated from us." The Doctor explained. "We have to find her."

 "Don't worry, Jace and Lolo are on it. We heard that there are three of you. I told them to help out when they can." (Name) said as she motioned them to follow on her.

 They arrived in some clearing when (Name) suddenly turned around and pointed her gun at the Doctor.

 The Doctor and Graham back off in surprise.

 "Now, tell me which group did you join with?" (Name) demanded.

 "W-what?"

 "You know my name. That's meant one of the groups told you."

 "I don't know what you are talking about, I have no idea what group are you talking about, believe me." The Doctor said, raising her hands in placating manner. "I know your name because we have met before. It's me, (Name), the Doctor."

 (Name) froze. "Doctor..." she whispered in disbelief.

 "I know I look different. I regenerated." The Doctor explained. "Surprise, I'm a woman now."

 "Doctor, you know her?" Graham finally asked.

 "She was my companion." The Doctor said with a sorrowful expression. "But she was lost to me a long time ago." She moved toward her. "How can you be here?"

 "Prove it." (Name) took a step back, still pointing the gun at her.

 "What?"

 "If you are really the Doctor, prove it to me."

 "I have two hearts, you are welcome to check." The Doctor said.

 (Name) scoffed. "You could be the Master for all I know."

 "Ok, fair point but the Master wouldn't have companion."

 "He once had a wife for companion."

 "Yeah, okay, that happened too." The Doctor thought about it. "Oh my sonic screwdriver. See." She pulled her sonic screwdriver proudly.

 (Name) didn't look impressed. "Tell me what was the last thing I said to you. If you are the Doctor, you would know."

 The Doctor was silent for a while. "You said..."

 "(Name)!! Incoming!!" A man suddenly rushed toward them with Yaz in tow.

 "Yaz!!" The Doctor ran and hugged Yaz in relief to see her safe and sound.

 "Doctor!" Yaz hugged her back.

 (Name) observed the interaction. The Doctor's identity is confirmed by the reaction of her companion. She stepped forward toward the man to deal with whoever coming.

 The man, Jace, ordered the Doctor and the rest to hide themselves as he readied himself for a fight.

 The Doctor, for once, obeyed the order and gestured her companion to do the same.

 The Doctor watched in a bit of fascination and horror as she watched her former companion disposed the threats in cold blood using every available weapon on her person.

 7777

 (Name) led the Doctor and friends to her group's domain. There were other people within domain, both human and alien alike.

 The Doctor stood close near her fam, awkwardly trying to comfort or grieve for Ryan with them.

 "Why are you lot looking like someone shot your puppy?" (Name) asked.

 Graham snapped at her, told her to show some compassion, they just lost one of their own.

 (Name) observed the Doctor's silent but fury expression. She knew that expression, the oncoming storm expression. She chuckled. "Well then, this is your lucky day. No one in this world stays dead for long."

 The Doctor frowned. "What does that mean?"

 "Right, I forgot that you are newcomers. Don't worry, Doctor, your friend will be fine. He or she will resurrected again at the end of the day." (Name) said.

 The Doctor exchanged a confused but hopeful look with Yaz and Graham and they demanded explanation some more.

 "I don't know much despite being here for long..." (Name) replied with faraway look.

 The Doctor flinched at that but she didn't noticed.

 "We didn't know where we are. We just called this world; prison world. As the name implied, there is no way out. People just keep adding, appearing out of nowhere, but we couldn't determine the way in or out. It is like we are in a some closed time loop or something. Every night the day reset and people who died today will be alive again. Found out about it the hard way actually the first time I came here." (Name) said with a sigh.

 "Wait, so the people that you and Jace killed earlier and Ryan, our friend, they will all come back to life again soon?" Yaz asked for confirmation.

 "Unfortunately." It was Jace who answered Yaz. "The day repeats and the hunting begins all over again. Everyday, we killed or be killed, over and over and over again."

 The Doctor kept her eyes on (Name) who remained silent, crossing her arms, with a look that the Doctor can't quite decipher. "I'm so sorry, (Name), I didn't know." She whispered. Had she known that (Name) survived, her previous incarnation would have never stop searching. Unfortunately, the Doctor had believe in her death, grieved for her and moved on.

 (Name) blinked at her apologies. "I know. Wasn't your fault that I ended up here. Surprise to see you, though. Never thought I would see, well, meet you again." She observed the Doctor. She knew her as a man before. It was, she dare say, a pleasant surprise to see the Doctor regenerated into a woman.

 Yaz stared at the Doctor and (Name). "Do you two know each other?"

 "She was a former companion according to the Doc." Graham replied. "She saved us from one of the crazy lunatics who had me at knife point."

 The Doctor still stared at (Name) with almost a longing look that made Yaz a bit jealous. "I still don't know how you ended up here."

 "That's because I didn't know either. I was fully expected to die that last time I saw you. But, this portal suddenly sucked me in and the next thing I knew, I was here..." (Name) said.

 "That's exactly what happened to us as well." Yaz exclaimed. "Isn't that right, Doctor?"

 "Yeah." The Doctor murmured softly. She took a step toward (Name). "How long have you been here?"

 (Name) shrugged. "Time doesn't exactly work right here so I don't have the slightest clue, feel like it has been forever though. I have been killed so many times here during the early months enough to start to fight back. I grew tired of being prey." She said with a cold look.

 "Wait, the last time you saw the Doc, you were expecting to die?" Graham asked.

 "(Name) sacrificed herself to save 90 people." The Doctor said softly with almost a hint of pride and a bout of sorrow.

 (Name) snorted at that. "I wouldn't recommend doing that." She said at Yaz and Graham. "It was not worth it. Never be a martyr, especially not for strangers. At the times, I thought I would be welcoming death and be at peace and shit, instead, I got this hellhole." 

 The Doctor flinched at that. She was feeling guilty.

 Jace moved to stand beside (Name), putting a hand on her arm as a gesture of comfort.

 The Doctor noticed how (Name)'s eyes softened at the sight of Jace and wondered if... But, she put a stop at that thought.

 "The things we had to do to survive... We have to kill and be killed so many times we lost count. Some of the people out there are very creative in their torture and killing methods. So, we have to learn to adapt, be the predator instead of the prey." Jace replied, staring at (Name) with obvious fondness.

 (Name) turned to regard the Doctor. "Right. I suggest we find your missing friend as soon as possible. I would hate for him to end up with Homer."

 "Homer?" Yaz asked. "Who is he?"

 Jace wrinkled his nose in distaste. "That man is a real psycho."

 Graham snorted. "Thought everyone here are all bonkers."

 Jace snorted. "Well, you are not wrong." He shared a grin with (Name). "But, Homer is a sadistic bastard. He is also a loner with a disarming look that could fool you into believing he is harmless. Unlike the others who left their victim of the day's bodies alone, this shit would keep them and wait them to resurrect to repeat the process again."

 "You said new people keep appearing here and you saved them." The Doctor said to (Name) with a proud tone.

 (Name) shrugged. "Only did it to get more people on our group. Safety in numbers and all that jazz."

 Now, the Doctor's expression looked like someone kicked her puppy.

 "Yup." Jace continued. "Can't let the other groups gets to them."

 (Name) asked for Ryan's description to which Graham showed his picture via his smartphone.

 The Doctor gazed at (Name) with a sad look. She wanted to catch a glimpse of the familiar girl she known before but she is beginning to wonder if the old (Name) has gone completely. She knew that (Name) had to adapt in order to survive in this harsh place and she can't judge her for her actions but to see the warm and kind girl she knew before turned into this cold and calculating woman is a bit too much.

 7777

 The Doctor ordered the fam to stay there while she goes with (Name) to fetch Ryan. They wanted to come too but the Doctor refused to risk their life.

 The Doctor followed (Name) trailing around the woods. She kept making conversation that fell flat because her former companion refused to open up with her.

 "(Name), I promise you, I will get you and the others out of here." The Doctor grabbed her and made that promise to her face. "I will save you."

 "Don't make a promise that you can't keep, Doctor. I knew better. I have travelled with you long enough to know the Doctor can't save everyone. At least, not always." She replied.

 The Doctor knew there is truth in what (Name) said but she is determined to save (Name) at all cost. She will not abandon her again.

 They were ambushed and the Doctor, once again, had to watch how (Name) killed their pursuers in cold blood. She noticed (Name) didn't falter at all and dare she says, it almost look like her former companion enjoyed the killing. The Doctor knew the people that (Name) killed will be resurrected again but the Doctor can't help feeling ill at the level of violence that her precious (Name) can muster.

 7777

 Yaz and Graham hugged Ryan when he returned with the Doctor and (Name) the next day. They were relieved to finally see him, as promised, alive.

 Finally getting her fam back, the Doctor can finally breathe easier and now she can focused more on the world around them. She started to interrogate (Name) and her group. The Doctor noticed the tower over towering the wood and deduced that they have to go there to investigate.

 However, (Name) and the group were very reluctant to go to the tower. In fact, they almost didn't acknowledge the existence of the tower. The Doctor realized there are a huge amount perception filter surrounding the tower which make the prisoners of this world steer clear of it. She reckoned the warden of this elaborate prison resides over there.

 It took some convincing but (Name) finally agreed to go to the tower after the Doctor dared her to. She was pissed at the Doctor for mocking her and took the bait.

 7777

 As (Name) feared, despite making sure to travel in small group and to tread lightly, they ended up got ambushed by various groups.

 The Doctor managed to garner their interest with her promise to get a way out of the prison world. "I am the Doctor. I am a time lord. I am two thousand years old. And I am the man, I mean, woman who will get you all a passage out of here. In fact, I am the only person smart enough to pull this off. All I need is your cooperation to cease fire and help to get to the tower." She said.

 (Name) rolled her eyes in fondness at the Doctor's familiar action. It reminded her when she used to travel with her Tenth incarnation.

 Some didn't believe the Doctor but some found amusement in her and decided to see what happen if they get along. One of them is a woman called Maeve and the Doctor recognized her as the woman who shot Ryan the day before.

 Graham and Ryan were understandingly wary of her especially with the way the woman being dismissive of her former victim.

 Yaz walked toward the Doctor and expressed concern. "Are you sure we should help them, Doctor? They were killers. Rescuing them and unleashing them in the real world after they got taste for murders doesn't seem right..."

 "Don't worry, I will hand them over to UNIT and Torchwood to rehabilitate them." The Doctor reassured her.

 7777

 The tower in question has a layer of protection. It was a good thing the Doctor has armies in her disposal to counter the tower's attack upon intruders.

 The Doctor found a room with complicated machinery which she deduced to be responsible for the time loop upon the world where nobody stays dead.

 There is an old man there, a watcher, he prefer to be called to counter the Doctor claimed that he is the warden. The man has some connection with the machine that causes both time loop and ensure the imprisonment of everyone there.

 "Why are you doing this? Why kept them prisoners?" The Doctor asked.

 "I had orders." The old man replied.

 It was then Jace found a room filled with monitors. It was a live feed of each person inside the prison world, showing the life of the prisoners.

 The Doctor pulled her sonic screwdriver over the live feed and realized it was broadcasted outside the prison world and to her ill feel, as some form of twisted entertainment of the galaxy out there.

 It was Maeve who snapped in fury and she broke the warden's neck.

 "Why did you do that? Dead within the tower is permanent!" The Doctor yelled at her in anger.

 "Good." Maeve said as she glared at the dead body of the warden.

 The machinery started bleeping suddenly and the Doctor rushed toward it to see what is going on. She was able to manipulate the energy from the machine to create a portal to call forth the Tardis. But, the dead of the warden as well as the manipulation of the energy caused the world to become unstable.

 The Doctor realized the warden is the anchor to this world and someone need to take his place or this world will quickly crumble out of existence.

 Maeve immediately threaten them to volunteer to be the anchor already. She took Yaz as hostage and demanded the Doctor to fix it so that she can get out of the cursed place.

 The Doctor tried to placate her. "I will get you lot out but you have to let Yaz go. I will not have you kill one of my friend again." she said with a hint of the oncoming storm in her tone.

 "Better hurry then, Doctor, like you said death within the tower is permanent. You wouldn't want to lose her for good." Maeve said with an evil smirk.

 A loud alarm sounded from within the tower causing Maeve to get momentarily distracted and the Doctor moved quickly to pull Yaz away frm her while (Name) stabbed Maeve, twisting the blade, to cause her more pain before dropping her to the floor.

 The Doctor glanced at Maeve's dead body and then toward (Name)'s blooded appearance with mixed feeling.

 "Go. Do your thing, Doctor." (Name) said flatly.

 The Doctor quickly moved back to deal with the machinery. She still need someone to be the anchor long enough for her to safely evacuate the rest of the people within the prison world and so far no one seemed to be volunteering. She can't stay as the anchor as she need to drive the Tardis later on.

 Shortly after, they all heard the wheezing sound of the blue box.

 (Name) couldn't help but smiled at the sound.

 The tower suddenly shook in tremble. The Doctor recognized that the world is still crumbling all around them.

 (Name) sighed, realizing that she has to take one for the team, despite her not really eager to be a martyr.

 "Not you, (Name), not again." The Doctor suddenly said, surprising her.

 Jace volunteered. "So, I have to the anchor long enough for you to get everyone to safety and then you will come and get me, right?" He asked for confirmation.

 "Yes." The Doctor replied, avoiding eye contact altogether as she busied herself with the machine.

 (Name) refused to let Jace to be the anchor. "No. You are not doing this. I told you not to be a martyr especially not for a bunch of strangers." (Name) grabbed one of his arms, pleading him.

 "But, you are not a stranger, (Name)." Jace replied causing her to be speechless.

 "You are an idiot."

 "But loveable idiot, right?" Jace asked cheekily.

 A shot was heard and Jace laid death on her feet. (Name) is stunned at the sudden turn of event. She numbly stared at Jace's death body and then at the new arrival of idiot people.

 The Doctor tried to diffuse the situation, trying to convince the group to cease fire and let her work out escape for everyone. She promised to give them a second chance if they leave their weapon out of the Tardis. But before she could convince them some more, (Name) went ballistic on most of them, uncaring of the injury she sustained in the process.

 "Why would you do that?" The Doctor is upset with (Name) killing people within the tower.

 "They don't deserve your second chance, Doctor. Not when those who deserve it, won't get it." (Name) said as she gestured on Jace's dead body.

 The Doctor told the fam to go aboard the Tardis. Yaz led some of the group that come earlier with them to come in, providing they agreed to shed all their weapon aside and they did.

 "Hook me out then."

 "What?"

 "You need an anchor, don't you?"

 "No, not you, (Name)."

 "My choice. And it's not like you have any other volunteer."

 The Doctor is silent but recognizing the truth in her words. So, she worked on her without words. After she made (Name) the anchor, she went inside the Tardis but before she closed the door, she gazed at her and said, "I will come back for you. I promise."

 (Name) sighed with a tired smile. "Do your best then, Doctor."

 The Doctor faltered. There is a crack in her mask. And (Name) knew then. The Doctor lies.

 "I guess this is goodbye." (Name) sighed.

 The Doctor looked like she was being slapped.

 "It is alright, Doctor, I wouldn't know what to do with your second chance anyway. I have been a killer for so long I wouldn't know how to be normal again...or how to be the (Name) you used to love."

 The Doctor knew she had to let her former companion to sacrifice herself once again but she is unwilling to let go. But time is running out and she has no choice but to abandon her again once more.

 7777

 After the Tardis disappeared from sight, (Name)'s knees buckled down as she let herself fall to the ground, defeated. She knew the moment the Tardis vanished from the prison world completely. She sat there for what seemed like hours before she made up her mind. The world has stopped crumbling but her heart still feel like it is about to shatter.

 (Name) didn't bother to find out if there are still anyone in this world, if the Doctor get them all to safety. She didn't care. She stood up and set to destroy the machine utterly, continuing the process of destroying this cursed world. She give herself a dead sentence and she welcomed it. She can only hope death will be permanent this time.

 7777

 The Doctor had put everyone to sleep via the sleeping gas inside the Tardis. She recognized the dangers of having this many potential killers on board the Tardis and she will not risk her fam's life. She contacted UNIT and Torchwood to deal with the people she rescued and left.

 She dropped the fam at their home as she said she wanted to be alone. Yaz is reluctant to leave her but the Doctor didn't give her a choice.

 She stood there at the console, alone and sad and tried to come to term with what happened. She shook her head and pulled a lever on the console and moved all around the console pushing some buttons.

 7777

 (Name) laid on the floor inside one of the cozy room within the tower, nursing herself a wine she found in there. She didn't like the taste but beggar can't be picky. She watched from the balcony the crumbling world outside absentmindedly.

 "(Name)..."

 She turned around when she heard that voice. "Doctor...?"

 There, stood in the middle of the room, an astral projection of the Doctor. She was staring at her with sorrow and regret.

 She took a few step forward toward the Doctor. "You are not really here..."

 "No." The Doctor said with clear regret. "I made use of tiny opening within the world you are in to send my astral projection here."

 "Why?"

 "I have to see you."

 She sighed. "Doctor..." She stared at her with fondness. "Why do you made yourself unnecessarily suffer right this?"

 The Doctor glanced at her sadly before replying, "because you are worth it."

 "I am really not." She said. "I am a monster. I saw how you look at me when I killed Maeve and the others.... I am not the old (Name) that was your companion."

 The Doctor didn't reply at that. She noticed the crumbling world outside but didn't comment on it even though she knew what it meant. She turned to look at (Name) with glassy eyes. "I am so sorry that I couldn't save you...again."

 "You are saving me. Before you came here, I didn't even know permanent death is possible. Now, I don't have to be a killer anymore." She said with a watery smile.

 The Doctor reached out toward her wanting to touch her before realizing she couldn't.

 (Name) smiled genuinely for the first time after so long. "My Doctor... Thank you for still be my doctor even for a short a while."

 "You will always be my (Name) no matter what."

 She shook her head. "Some part of me wishes you never laid eyes on this part of me. I would rather you remember me as the (Name) that was kind and innocent, not this Me, this ugly version of me."

 "You are not ugly. Never to me. You will always beautiful in my eyes." The Doctor said.

 Tears started to fell from (Name)'s cheek as she nodded gratefully. Even if it was a lie, she was glad to hear it from her Doctor. She wanted to say she loves her and that she always will but she feel like it would be unfair to her. So, she didn't.

 "You better go now, Doctor." She said as she noticed the tower is starting to fall apart around them. "I would rather you are not here for this part. Allow me some dignity."

 The Doctor gazed at her longingly before she pulled a stone from her pocket. She kept her eyes on (Name) before took a step back and push the button on the stone and with a blip, the projection is gone.

 (Name) smiled before turning to face her end.

 7777

 The Doctor bend in front of the console. Her face is clouded with sorrow as she stared at the monitor. The monitor show the recorded feed of (Name) from the moment she first arrived inside the prison world until their painful goodbye.

 The Doctor, after she left (Name) to her death, tracked down the link to the broadcast to see who set up the prison world. She found the recorded life of the prisoners instead. She took the entire drives before blowing up the station that broadcasted it. She has not found the real culprit yet but she will. And when she did, it is only a matter of time, she will make them pay dearly for taking (Name) in the first place, for taking a companion from the Doctor.

 She paused the record to a face of her former companion. She touched the face within the monitor longingly, letting her sorrow and the righteous fury of the oncoming storm to wash over her again.

       When love was untamed

Two burning hearts are dared to break, remember

Nobody said that it would last forever

-Lewis Capaldi, Forever

    A/N2: Well, this fic kinda inspired by the prison world of Legacies and the tragic love between Sebastian and Lizzie so I decided to make one but with the Doctor and Reader. I'm a sucker for angst, after all. Legacies is one of my favorite witches show and I was thinking about making a DW x Legacies fusion fic in which the reader is a witch. I read plenty of DW fic on tumblr before with the reader being a witch or any other supernatural creatures and I want to write something similar to them. But, the problem is I have to write them first before posting it and it's hard I just wanna cry here.

Anyway, please leave like/comment/reblog if you like this fic, maybe? Thank you for reading till the end.

And thank you for everyone who read all my fanfiction and has leave like/comment/reblog before. You are all my sunshine.