#and i just feel like a scared helpless kid
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pleasedontcareaboutme · 7 months ago
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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry
( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)
(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)
#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him#I always knew he was a parental figure for me#but now I connected the dots#How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life#that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so#and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life#ofc ud become attached#i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him#he occupies most of my thoughts honestly#But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life#i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an#bloom and be free#and that's what ill try to do#but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness#its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired#somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea#how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi#g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if#lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways#sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay#yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le#go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk#how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate#my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t#me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol#so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest#y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t#ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti#ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd
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smolsix · 2 years ago
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-blows dust off this blog-
So
Little Nightmares III, huh???
I was trying to avoid being excited about it because no solid release date and 2024 could be a few months from now or a year from now and Idk how long I can handle being so fuckin hyped for this game YEEHAW
BUT I CAN'T, I KEEP THINKING ABT THE GAME AAHAHHGAGA
so here are my thoughts, if you wanted to know
FIRST OF ALL, i am so glad that after we saw LTNM II we thought it'd be co-op but it was just an AI, that we finally get co-op! AND ONLINE TOO, i spent the first day worried it'd be shared screen same room situation since i wasn't trying to get my hopes up but then I realised I can just.. google it.. AND IT IS!!! ONLINE!! IDK WHO I AM GONNA PLAY IT W FIRST AAAAAAAA
anyways, you can definitely tell it's a new studio working on this game, the world feels mostly the same but the character designs themselves are definitely stylistically similar, but not the same. With Six especially, the MC designs were very simplistic and realistic but used colour (or for Mono, a single design quirk being the bag) to stand out against their backgrounds and against the enemies which are largely neutral colours. But these new ones feel... "over designed"? On their own they definitely aren't, but in comparison to Mono, Six, Seven, and even NPCs like the flashlight girl, they have a lot more going on (especially the little wrench kid, Idk which one is Alone and which one is Low yet btw OOP)
Despite it being a new studio and you can tell, new puzzles and environments, they're still doing their best to have the OGs vibes and whatnot to feel familiar, namely in the trailer they bring back the fuses, and the additional gameplay video there's a short scene with an environment with all the shelves you can find in LTNM 1s gnome section (the one with the cart that is affected by the Maws swaying).
But regardless, it still feels different enough my brain is still nervous about it. I also feel In A Way about Tarsier having LTNM II explode and their franchise getting the attention it deserves, only to have it stuck with Bandai and now it's going to likely explode again and they aren't involved. Idk how anyone on that team feels about it, but if it were me omg.
Also the only boss we've seen so far (i hope they add more and i def want some to be a surprise so im not gonna assume this is the only one for now) feels... out of place? it has the design qualities of a LTNM boss, but the size of it makes it more of a spectacle than a warped/corruption of an adult. All the previous bosses fit in their environment, we are the small ones and they are scaled to the world around them. This is the first time, outside monster Six who imo is a bit of an outlier anyways due to her circumstances, we're getting a boss who is this huge and doesn't even fit their own environment. I hope we get a lore reason for this in some way, because currently the boss doesn't have the same vibe as the others and it's throwing me off a bit. Don't get me wrong, it'll be terrifying, but looking at the picture as a whole they are sort of out of place for me rn. I don't hate the bitch either, I'm not gonna be like omg get rid of it or change it, but it does strike me as odd seeing it for now.
And yes the tall man is too tall for a lot of things, but he's not THAT big. He's more like yer tall guy who hits his head off doorways, which happens irl anyways LMAO
Little Nightmares primarily tries to capture the feeling of being a small child and how everything is big and scary, but a doll that huge is out of the realm of reality set up for us already. It's gone from scary corrupted animal to godzilla, if that makes sense.
OH AND THE MIRRORS ARE VERY LTNM COMICS OF THEM TEE HEE < 3
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martyrbat · 2 years ago
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batman and superman vs vampires and werewolves #2
#feeling fucking insane about this actually#bruce talking out loud to jason's memorial case—sharing the events of the night with his robin—with his son.#dicks response..... that lightheartedness before being slightly snarky at the realization....#‘havent been called that in a long time’ before realizing bruce was almost hoping for it to be jason despite how illogical it may be#‘have room for one more?’ ‘might as well throw a ghost in the mix’ AND BRUCE REACHING FOR HIM BUT STOPPING HIMSELF!!!#like yeah jason coming back is cool and all (hate most of his red hood character lmao) but!!! this!!!!#haunting the narrative and influencing bruce and being a driving force in bruces still despite his death!!!!!#HELL MORE BECAUSE OF IT EVEN#bruce experienced the greatest lost of his life twice. the first as a kid and his parents deaths and how it was a driving force to make him#dedicate his entire life to fighting crime and helping others. but then he experienced it again but now as the parent#he now knows firsthand the other side of that coin. he knows both sides of grief and mourning and lost#first as a helpless child. then as batman. he became batman to prevent this from ever happening yet he still couldn't prevent it#making him push himself more and more because he still wasnt good enough. he still failed.#he still has only himself to blame for all 3 murders.#like losing jason was the thing that tipped him over on he cant ever have that civilian life hes yearned for and wanted#because there's always going to be scared little boys with blood on their hands that needs help. just whos blood it is can and has differ#anyways. bruce talking to jason still while working and trying to help others..... man.#c: batman and superman vs vampires and werewolves | i: 2#crypt's panels#batman#bruce wayne#dick grayson#nightwing#jason todd#robin ii#bruce & dick#bruce & jason
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tchaikovskym · 2 years ago
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Whenever a life change I worked for and looked forward to is going to happen: oh no!
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holeforzenin · 3 months ago
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𝜗𝜚˚⋆ GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI!
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Tw - STEPCEST, cheating, age-gap(early 20s n early 40s), anal play, daddy/dad kink, oral, some really inappropriate and gross stuff. Stepcest isn’t blood related. Not proofread.
A/n - “Toji wouldn’t do th-“ I don’t give a shit, goodnight.
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GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who secretly rubs your little pussy through your thin cotton panties from underneath the blanket while you're having a movie night with your family in the living room.
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who tells your clueless mother that he’s taking you on a daddy-and-daughter bonding trip for a few days so the two of you can spend more time together and get to know each other more which only ends up with his hefty cock being stuffed deep into your innocent pussy— filling you up to the brim in some random hotel not too far from your house.
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who instantly gets rock hard whenever you'd call him “dad” or “daddy”. He just can’t help when a sweet young thing like you is innocently batting your eyelashes up at him and asking him for his assistance. God, you’re so helpless, you can’t do anything without the help from your dad, not even cumming. :(
Which is why he has to sneak into your bedroom dead at night and skillfully poke his stepdaughter’s g-spot with his fat tip till you can finally cum and make a big mess on his cock.
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who's obsessed with you sitting on his face, your warm dripping pussy nestled in his mouth while his eager tongue skillfully laps at the essence of your arousal from your glistening entrance. His nose presses into your rim purposefully, causing your adorable hole to wink against his nose in playful response to his inhales and breathing. He needs you on his face at least once a day :(
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who you coincidentally encounter in the bathroom, late at night while he’s pissing so that quickly escalated with his girthy cock now being shoved down your throat and he's thrusting it rhythmically in and out your mouth. Your eyes begin to well up with tears which only fuels him even more to use your mouth to his favor as he deviously grins down at you when he notices how you're helplessly playing with your drenched pussy with your fingers.
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who gets off from being risky, especially when your mom is dozing off on the couch and he has you forcefully bent over the cold marble kitchen counter with one of his muscular hands pressed firmly against your lower back so you won't escape from his hold. His fat thumb is clogging your ass and his veiny cock is stretching your little pussy apart around his shaft while his angry tip is exploring the depths of your cunt.
He'd be such a mean man and force his thumb deeper and deeper into your asshole just so he can get a cute reaction from you and hear you whine while you desperately claw at his beefy forearm for him to stop :( He only chuckles and laughs at how scared you are as if you don't love it as much as he does.
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who loves referring to himself as Daddy while he's balls deep into your slippery hole. Your trembling knees are knocking against your soft, bouncing tits and you're desperately gasping for air while your nails are sinking into his strong hand that's encircling your neck. "Shh shh c'mon be a good little step-kid f'daddy and take my cock". He whispers, trailing a thumb up to your glossy lips before inserting it into your mouth for you to suck on.
His cock is crammed into your tight pussy, and the way you keep sucking him in deeper and deeper every hazy second makes him not want to pull out anytime soon. He just can't get enough of your pussy. "That's it, that's baby, yer making daddy feel sooo good".
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who has developed a habit of sniffing your cunt and ass, he just can't help it :( he just loves your natural scent and can't get enough of you when he's bending down behind your small figure while you're engrossed in cooking dinner for the family and pulls your shorts down to bury his pointy nose in your moist pussy.
A plague of worries clouds your head when you feel his nose prodding into your tight entrance in the open. "T-toji! n-not here, she'll see!", you pleaded as you attempted to push his head away from your rear only for him to clasp both of your hands into his larger ones with just a chuckle rumbling against your cunny. soft whimpers escape your lips when you hear his loud whiffs of your pussy.
GRIMY STEP-DAD TOJI! who loves nothing more than licking his step-daughter’s little pussy at any given chance he gets :(
It's so prohibited and “taboo” and the older man is very much aware of that but he just can't help it when he's quietly slipping into your bedroom late at night to run his salivating tongue over the sapping mound— He’s been practically thinking about it the entire day.
His clothed cock immediately starts twitching uncontrollably every time his grimy thoughts clouded his vivid imagination, all he could do at work was discreetly palm his hardened bulge and give it a hard squeeze for friction and temporary relief.
He barely could wait till everyone was asleep to taste your delicious pussy again.
A deep involuntary groan leaves his lips from the taste of your creamy pussy melting on his tastebuds. The sensation of the sticky slick clinging onto his tongue stirred a desperate throbbing in his cock, yearning for more. God, every fiber of his being ached to plunge his hard cockhead into your warm, virgin pussy and ravish you until you painted his shaft with your cream but he won't... at least not yet.
Luckily for him, you were sleeping on your stomach and the tranquility of your slumber allowed him to cautiously lower your adorable panties down, gently resting it at your lower thighs, and parted your plush cheeks using his thumbs to peek at your delicate pussy. The glossy sheen veiling your folds glistened in the dim light, making his fat cock throb with urgency.
“Fuck, so pretty” he whispered breathlessly, sticking his tongue out to lap at your messy folds, his tongue flickers back and forth, licking up at your wetness and replacing it with his spit and intertwining saliva. Unfortunately for him, you weren’t a heavy sleeper so the sensation of his soft, wet tongue wiggling against your most intimate place was enough to stir you awake.
Your eyelids flutter open weakly, giving way to the heavy fog of slumber that still clung to your countenance. Sleep is evident in your features as your tummy tingles from the continuous sensation of the stimulation. Your vision was clouded with fuzziness but you could still make out the muscular silhouette of your step-father.
He was huge and muscular, he wasn’t built like some ordinary man so there was no mistake that it was him.
“Daddy?”You mumbled innocently, rubbing your eyes in hopes of having a clearer view after.
“W-hat are you doing?”
“Shh shh, go back to sleep doll. Dad’s gonna take care of ya” he lightly chuckled before caressing your ass and placing a few wet kisses on your soft cheeks.
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35gofbeansprouts · 1 year ago
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💭.
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griffinkid · 11 months ago
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I don't want to be treated like a fragile helpless baby, I want to be treated like a little one just learning things for the first time
I want to get the level of praise and encouragement that little kids get that nobody gives you as an adult
"Great job! You did so well with this."
"I know you're scared but I'll be right here with you."
"It's alright, everybody makes mistakes, you can always try again."
"Even if you fail, I'll still love you."
"It's tough learning new things, isn't it? Nobody gets it right first time, don't be discouraged."
"You did your best and I'm so proud of you."
Edit: you know what, I didn't actually think as many of you were going to relate to this, but since this is getting notes:
I'm proud of you. I think you're doing great.
You don't need to compare yourself to others. I like you just the way you are.
I know you feel alienated sometimes, but I promise, you're always welcome here.
Yes, you've made mistakes. I've made them too! I still like you and so does everyone else!
Life is tough, but not all of us are. It's alright to be soft. Stay soft.
You will be just fine. We all will be just fine in the end.
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I'm so sorry I had to add this
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ari-ana-bel-la · 29 days ago
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Hi my love please please please could you write for any driver but preferably Charles or George with a daughter who was born really early and with a heart condition so they were super worried but once she’s older (like 15) she’s really sporty but she still like faints sometimes and gets really sick and dizzy and just her dad and honorary uncles helping her out a couple times in the paddock cos their all so used to it
Stronger than you think
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George had always known he would be a protective dad. He wasn’t ashamed of it. From the moment Yn came into the world too early, too fragile, with a heart condition that had left him and Carmen sleepless for weeks on end, he had promised himself he’d always be there.
And he had been. Every hospital visit, every late-night fever, every dizzy spell—he was there, holding her hand, reassuring her, sometimes pretending he wasn’t terrified himself.
Yn was fifteen now, and she was stubborn. She had fallen in love with tennis when she was ten, and despite everything—the fainting, the exhaustion, the doctor’s warnings that she had to be careful—she refused to give up.
George admired that about her. He also hated it. Because every time she stepped onto the court, he worried. Every time she insisted she was fine, he doubted it. And every time she got dizzy, he was reminded that his baby girl was still fragile, no matter how strong she tried to be.
Which was exactly why he was on edge every time she joined him at a race weekend. The heat, the long walks, the excitement—it was a recipe for disaster. And George, along with her honorary uncles, had long perfected the art of handling it when things went south.
It happened in Saudi-Arabia.
Yn had been fine all morning, sipping on the electrolyte drink her mom had packed, chatting with Lando about some ridiculous show they were both watching. George had kept an eye on her, as he always did, but she looked good. Healthy.
That lasted until just before qualifying.
George was getting ready to leave the hospitality area when he caught Alex’s eyes widen slightly, glancing toward Yn.
“Uh, mate?” Alex’s voice was calm but urgent.
George turned and saw it immediately. Yn had gone pale—too pale. Her hands gripped the counter, her breathing quickening.
“Yn,” George was at her side in a second, his hands on her arms. “Sweetheart, talk to me.”
Yn squeezed her eyes shut, shaking her head. “Dizzy,” she whispered.
Alex had already moved, pulling a chair over. “Here, sit down.”
George guided her onto the chair as Lando appeared, kneeling in front of her. “Did you drink enough?” Lando asked, voice softer than usual.
“She did,” George answered for her, brushing a few damp strands of hair from her forehead. “It’s just the heat, probably. You’re okay, love, just breathe.”
Yn nodded, gripping his arm as if grounding herself. “Sorry,” she muttered.
Lando scoffed. “Don’t be dumb. It’s fine.”
Alex reappeared with a cold towel, pressing it against the back of her neck. “You’re doing great, kid.”
Yn huffed a weak laugh. “I hate this.”
George’s heart clenched. “I know, sweetheart,” he murmured. “Just let it pass.”
Yn leaned against him, and George felt the tension in his chest loosen slightly when her breathing evened out. It was always like this—a scare, a moment of helplessness, and then she’d be fine again.
But that never made it easier.
It was Saturday in Silverstone when it happened again.
Yn had been feeling good that morning—excited even. Charles had promised to take her to the Ferrari garage and show her the car up close, and she had been buzzing about it for hours.
But excitement, George had learned, could be just as dangerous as exhaustion.
They were halfway through the tour when Charles suddenly reached out, catching Yn’s arm as she swayed slightly.
“Woah,” Charles steadied her, his grip firm but gentle. “Yn, you okay?”
Yn blinked rapidly, exhaling sharply. “Uh. No. Not really.”
George had been walking just a few steps behind, and his heart nearly stopped when he saw her expression.
Charles didn’t hesitate. “Come, sit down.”
He led her to a small bench, guiding her down as George rushed over.
Yn let out a shaky laugh. “This is so embarrassing.”
George crouched in front of her, checking her pulse. “You feeling faint?”
Yn nodded. “Yeah. A little.”
Charles had already grabbed a bottle of water, twisting off the cap and handing it to her. “Sip this. Slowly.”
George exhaled, rubbing a hand over his face. “This keeps happening,” he muttered.
Charles patted his shoulder. “She’s okay.”
Yn made a face. “I don’t feel okay.”
Charles chuckled. “I know, but you will.”
They stayed there for a few more minutes, Charles and George keeping a careful watch over her. Eventually, the color returned to her face, and she sighed, leaning against her dad’s shoulder.
“Sorry,” she mumbled.
George kissed the top of her head. “Stop apologizing, love.”
Charles grinned. “Yeah, you’re just keeping us on our toes.”
Yn groaned. “I hate being the fragile one.”
George’s grip on her tightened slightly. “You’re not fragile,” he said. “You’re stronger than anyone I know.”
She looked up at him, eyes bright despite the exhaustion. “Really?”
George smiled. “Really.”
It was the summer break, and George had thought Yn would get a much-needed rest.
But no. She had been training for an upcoming tennis tournament, and by the time she arrived at the next race weekend, she was already drained.
It didn’t take long for Lando to notice.
“Alright, what’s up with you?” he asked after she sat down with a little too much effort.
Yn blinked at him. “Nothing?”
Lando raised a brow. “Right. And I’m an astronaut.”
Yn rolled her eyes. “I’m just tired.”
Lando turned to George, who sighed. “She’s been pushing herself too hard.”
Yn scoffed. “I have not.”
Lando narrowed his eyes. “You’re a terrible liar.”
Yn groaned, rubbing her temples. “Can you guys stop treating me like I’m made of glass?”
Lando grinned. “Never.”
Yn groaned louder, but before she could argue more, Lando pulled out his phone.
“Okay, we’re gonna play a game,” he announced.
Yn blinked. “What?”
“A game,” Lando repeated. “Distraction tactics. I ask you questions, you answer them. No thinking too hard.”
Yn sighed. “Fine.”
Lando smirked. “Alright, what’s the worst movie you’ve ever seen?”
Yn frowned. “Uh. That one you made me watch. The one about the talking dog.”
Lando gasped dramatically. “That movie is a masterpiece!”
George chuckled, shaking his head. “She’s right, mate. It was terrible.”
Yn grinned. “See?”
Lando pretended to look offended. “Unbelievable.”
Yn laughed, and for a moment, she looked like she wasn’t exhausted. And that was all Lando needed.
George sent him a grateful look. Lando just shrugged.
This was their routine. And they were damn good at it.
That night, after the race, George found Yn sitting outside, staring at the stars.
He sat beside her, nudging her knee with his. “What’s on your mind?”
Yn sighed. “I just… hate that this keeps happening.”
George stayed quiet, letting her speak.
“I hate that I still faint. I hate that I still get dizzy. I hate that everyone worries about me.” She exhaled, eyes glassy. “I just wanna be normal.”
George’s heart ached. He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close. “Yn, listen to me. You are normal. And you’re also strong. And brave. And kind. And stubborn as hell.”
Yn snorted. “You say that like it’s a good thing.”
George smiled. “It is.”
She leaned against him. “Thanks, Dad.”
George kissed her hair. “Always, sweetheart.”
And he meant it. No matter how many times she fainted, no matter how many times she got sick—he would always be there. Because that’s what fathers did.
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♥︎♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Authors Note: Hey loves! I hope you enjoyed reading this story. My requests are always open for you.
-🩷🎀
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luveline · 11 months ago
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Hiiiiii!!!!!!! I recently got back into criminal minds and devoured all ur hotch fics like a MANIAC (you write. So unbelievably well. Im also in love w ur tasm peter stuff, you are just such a good writer thru and thru) and that one request where Jack calls reader mom for the first time really stuck w me so I was wondering if maybe I could request smth of the opposite? Like not-so-single mom!reader and hotch have been dating for a while and her lil girl calls him dad for the first time :3 ��🖤
thank you for requesting! 💌 —your daughter calls Hotch dad for the first time. fem, 2k
“Come in, come in!” Hotch says, the door held ajar by his arm, forcing you to squeeze in and save the heat. “Quickly, honey, please, get out of the rain.” 
Sarah bursts in through the door and away from the rain, her vinyl coat covered in raindrops, her boots wet with mud. “Aaron!” she says, pulling it into something softened and excited at once, though her ‘r’s are weak, closer to ‘w’s. “I missed you.” She jumps from one foot to the other. 
He makes sure you’re safely inside before he abandons you. It’s not very kind to you, but he can’t help himself. “Sarah,” he says, without your daughter’s sweetness but heavily fond, “I missed you more, honey. How many days has it been?” 
“Four!” she says, holding up four fingers as Hotch grabs her by the waist. 
He doesn’t mind her wet coat, working an arm around and beneath her to shuck off her muddy shoes. They topple to the ground to unveil damp socks. 
“Oh, no, your socks are wet. I did all the laundry while we were waiting, I have some warm ones for you in the dryer. Should we get you out of this coat?” 
“Where’s Jack?” you ask. 
“Eating. He was starving, couldn’t wait.” 
You kick your shoes off and gather them with Sarah’s to line up by the door. Hotch takes off Sarah’s coat with some one-armed manoeuvring, aware of her smiley gaze following his every move. 
“I,” you say, pressing a swift kiss to his cheek, cold lips to his rough skin, “am gonna go to the toilet really quickly. Hi, handsome.” 
He savours your kiss and watches you go. He owes you a better greeting, he missed you just as much as he missed your girl. For now, he wipes the cold from Sarah’s cheeks and stations her comfortably on his navel. 
He loves her like his own. He’s privileged to get the opportunity, and it’s hard not to feel that low level of awe whenever she’s around, because she loves him the same way. Sarah waits for him to smile before she wraps her arms around his neck, long enough to twine her fingers in the short hair she finds there. 
It’s funny to love someone you had no hand in bringing into the world, but no less real. He’d do anything for Sarah. I miss you doesn’t cover it, but it’s a start. “I missed you,” he murmurs, not well-versed in baby talk but always willing to try for his kids. “It’s so nice to see you. Jack missed you too, should we go see him? I can change your socks.” 
He ushers her back enough to see her. She has such loving eyes, not shy at all as she nods her head. “Can you make crackers?” 
He beams. “Oooh, yes. Crackers and cheese and apple slices, I know what you want, honey. It’s ready for you in the kitchen.” 
Things weren’t easy at first for either you nor Hotch. He works too much, and you both have priorities that can’t be shifted, but the connection between you was easy. Love, undoubtedly, pretty much the moment you met, even if it scared him. He never thought he’d get a second chance and he’s not sure you thought you’d find yours either, and yet loving you has been as helpless as loving your daughter. He doesn’t have a choice and he doesn’t want one. 
In this time, you’ve found routine. He’s introduced the idea of moving in together and you’re excited for it, though concrete plans haven’t been laid. There’s a lot of questions and no need to rush into answering them yet. He has no intentions of letting you go now —Hotch will do anything it takes to keep his small family. 
Today, right now, that’s crackers. 
“Sarah!” Jack says when he sees them, jumping off of his chair to climb on top of it. He holds his hands out and Hotch leans down with a loving laugh to let his son hug her. “You’re back!” 
“I’m back,” she agrees. 
“Do you want some of my sandwiches? Daddy made me two.” 
“Yes!” she says, wiggling to be put down and given what he’s promising. 
Hotch fights to take her to the sink and wash her little hands, to her horror and whining. He says, “Okay, okay, I’m sorry, sweetheart, but you gotta wash your hands before you eat.” 
He puts her in her own chair, and it is Sarah’s chair, outfitted with a big pillow so she can see the table and marked by a pink star sticker, putting a placemat in front of her. Jack quickly pushes one of his sandwiches towards her. “There you go.” 
“Thank you, Jackers,” she says. 
Hotch smiles. Despite their different interests and ages, they’re quick to get along. 
He shouldn’t pry while you’re in the bathroom, but he worries about you. “Honey?” he calls up the stairs. 
“I’m just changing!” 
“Yeah? Can you bring some socks for Sarah, please?” 
You shout back something incomprehensible. He returns to the kitchen, where Sarah looks over the chair with pleading eyes and asks, “Crackers?” a piece of lettuce stuck to her chin. 
“Ah,” he says showfully, turning to the fridge to grab the plate of crackers, sliced cheese, and apples he’d Saran wrapped an hour ago. He peels off the wrapping and places it in front of her. “Here, sweetheart. Do you want anything else? Maybe some chips?” 
She laughs and grabs a piece of apple without answering him. 
“What about you, sweetheart? Drink?” he asks Jack. 
“Yes please, daddy.” 
Hotch makes Jack a cup of orange juice and Sarah a sippy cup, hers diluted some with water. He places them down in front of the kids, crouching between their chairs, intending to stay and chat. “How’s that?” he asks, tilting his head to the side to listen for your light footsteps on the stairs.  
“Thanks, daddy,” Jack says. 
“Thank you, daddy,” Sarah echoes, reaching for him. Hotch offers his hand, startled, not quick enough to hide it. She doesn’t pay any mind to his expression, pleased to have her hand held and her big plastic plate of crackers to munch on. 
“Why’d you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” you ask, passing him Sarah’s socks, and rounding the table to stand by Jack's other side. “Hi,” you add, ruffling Jack’s hair, “look at you, gorgeous, you got your hair cut.” 
Hotch rubs Sarah’s knuckles, trying to phrase it, not sure how to tell you with the kids still there. Will Sarah feel embarrassed if he brings it up so swiftly? Will she feel like she’s done something wrong? Will you? 
“What’s wrong?” you ask. 
He decides to present you with the situation. He’s not manipulative, but clever. “Mommy got your socks, too. Can we take these cold ones off, is that okay?” 
“Yes, please,” Sarah says.
You watch in confusion. Hotch gives you a quick look. Trust me for a second. 
He eases the socks off of her feet, laughs when she laughs at his tickling, even if he’s not quite sure how to feel. Happy, he gives her toes a squeeze and bunches a sock up to pull it over her heel and up to her ankle. “One,” he says, repeating the process with the same tenderness. “Two. There we go, all warm again, Sarah.” 
“Thanks, daddy.” 
You breathe in. 
Sarah puts some cheese on a cracker and offers it to Hotch, who eats it while you summon him away with silent parent talk. He kisses her forehead and wipes it clean as he goes. 
“Did she do that when I was upstairs?” you ask quietly. 
Hotch knows you. Loves you, but knows you intrinsically. He knows just by looking at you that you’re happy, but you’re worried about something, and it’s not hard to guess what it is: he might not want Sarah to call him daddy, and telling her not to might break her heart, and yours too. 
“She did.” 
“She’s never… expressed that interest to me.” 
“Sometimes they think about things more than we know.” Jack still surprises him as he did when he was a toddler.
“She just loves you,” you say. 
“I love her. She can call me whatever she wants to.” 
You hold his wrist, taking a step closer to him. “Are you sure?” 
“Of course I’m sure.” He murmurs now you’re close, ducking his head to yours, two halves of the same heart looking at one another’s hands. “I love her more than anything in the world. I want to make her crackers for the rest of my life.” Hotch puts his index finger to the soft skin under your chin. “Maybe by tomorrow she’ll forget she called me daddy and she’ll never say it again, but… I want her to. Is that okay?” he asks. 
You lean up to kiss him and you nod into his lips, which makes it hard but not impossible to kiss back. “She loves you so much,” you say quietly. You’d only wanted a quick peck. 
He might’ve said he loves her more than anything, but there’s a level on which he holds her and Jack where you sit too. He loves you. You made Sarah who she is all by yourself, and you’re so lovable standing in his reach. You’re perfect. 
Maybe he’s feeling sweet because Sarah called him daddy. 
“I think Jack confused her,” he says. 
“Maybe. You are, you know, her dad. You do everything a dad would.” 
Hotch slots his leg between yours and leans back to force you into his favourite kind of hug. You laugh slowly, hug the same, your arms sliding up over his shoulders to wrap behind his head, your hand cupping his hair. 
He closes his eyes and feels your waist. 
“You don’t have to worry,” he says. 
“I don’t worry about you and Sarah, I know you love her. I guess I just worry about us. Not that you don’t love me, Aaron.” 
“Big changes,” he guesses in a whisper. 
“Big changes.” 
He encourages you away to hold your face. He hopes that waiting with you in quiet for a while can explain it better than words. 
Your shoulders finally relax. 
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sepublic · 10 months ago
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I cannot imagine being Camila Noceda because so much of her arc starts around her being scared for her child, wanting her to do well and succeed and being afraid she’ll get hurt. And then right under her nose, her daughter has disappeared on some adventure in another world but at least she seems fine, right?
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But you still let yourself break and you end up saying things you might regret. And then it’s only when you begin to worry about her that she comes back and she is scarred. She’s hurt. There’s a cut on her eyebrow and you realize it will never heal. It always reminds you of how you weren’t there for her, you couldn’t protect your daughter from those who hurt her, and if you’d been enough for Luz then maybe she wouldn’t have needed to come to the isles to begin with and be injured. You see how she’s begun to loathe and hate herself, because of things and people entirely outside of her control, and you couldn’t have been there to comfort her when she needed it. So now it’s built up for Luz into this horrific trauma that she hasn’t even yet begun to unpack.
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Camila is stronger than everyone because if I’d seen my kid come back like that, I’d have broken apart asking what happened, are you okay, etc. But instead she remains strong because she can see that Luz and her kids are scared and they really need an adult who can be strong for them. Camila probably thought about what happened in Yesterday’s Lie afterwards, and come to regret her outburst; She must’ve guessed how it hurt Luz and made her feel terrible and alas she was right! So she vowed not to make that same mistake again and be even stronger next time, and she was!!!
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But man that must’ve been so scary and helpless and painful, seeing what happened under your watch. Being unable to provide a fix in getting her back home, so of course Camila goes along to the Demon Realm once she gets that opportunity, because this all started because she wasn’t there for her daughter when she needed her most. Of course she supports her in coming out, as well as in staying in the isles; She won't blame Eda for giving Luz what she wanted and needed, as Eda herself couldn't be a hypocrite by telling Luz to stay with her mom. Camila won’t let Luz face this stuff alone like last time, not when she knows and Luz feels better about trusting her (or had to, anyway) and it’s what saves Luz!!! Because when Luz relapses after failing against Kikimora, it’s Camila who’s there to pick her back up and tell her everything she needs, which leads to Luz’s palisman String Bean finally emerging!!!
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But then Luz dies and just. That scar must’ve reminded Camila that she wasn’t there to protect her daughter from anyone that might hurt her. And despite helping a little against Kikimora, it still happened again. Permanently. Man I wish Camila had a “GET AWAY FROM HER YOU BITCH” moment to get back at Belos for all she did her to child. But Camila had to keep going because after Yesterday’s Lie, she knew she still had other kids to look after. She was strong for Vee during Yesterday’s Lie, only to let herself drop right afterwards in front of Luz. But not again. No time for self pity, you just have to move on after a death and keep living, just as you did with Manny. And in the end, Luz IS all right, and she’s better than she’s ever been and there’s some huge relief.
Just augh Camila Noceda. Luz went on an isekai adventure, but maybe so did her mother? And I don’t mean with the Boiling Isles, I mean with the U.S. Camila might have been an immigrant, and not just the child/descendant of one. And even if she wasn’t, she still moved to Gravesfield. So in general so much of her life has been about going to another world and trying to survive and feel comfortable in it. As it was for Luz, too; But they survived along the way and found what fellow “weirdoes” they could, with Camila meeting Manny, who could’ve also related to her as a fellow Dominican American. And now she’s found others who can relate to Camila in other ways, as Manny also related to her as a huge nerd.
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milkamel · 17 days ago
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Ahem. Hi.
I know I've drawn a lot of shadowvanilla stuff recently and yapped about how much I love it when actually… I was lying.
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I HATE IT WITH BURNING PASSION!!!!!!!!!!!! I only drew it cause it was.......... ugh, popular 🙄🙄
You people love abusive ships huh what's wrong with you like actually how can you ship something that has such a big power imbalance?? Are TOXIC relationships a joke to you?
Thinking that I'm being stupid and that this ship isn't an abuser x victim?? Well, let me show you proof.
(ALSO PLEASE REBLOG TO SPREAD THE AWARENESS!!!!)
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Look at Truthless Recluse here, he's clearly distressed and angry. Not like how Pure Vanilla would act, as he's nice and sweet with everyone. BUT NOT WITH SHADOW MILK...........
You know what they say.............… abusers only show their true selves with people they abuse and here he is screaming at the poor Smilky Twinky like an angry feral animal!! As you can see 'Pure' Vanilla isn't actually THAT pure…. he's a heartless monster who torments the poor little guy...................... (I bet he throws beer bottles at Shamil too)
Next point!
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A lot of people lately have been spreading an absolutely inaccurate headcanon that Pure Vanilla is 'minor coded' which is a blatant LIE.............. It has been proven that Shadow Milk is the one who's minor coded and has been unfairly attacked.
Here we see him turn into a kid specifically when PV is around. You know why? Correct, he's scared of Pure Vanilla. He feels small around him, helpless, like a child so he literally becomes one. Not so funny now, shadowvanilla shippers? (also the fact that he's a jester!! kids like toys and flashy stuff!! minor coded behavior!!)
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Now the manipulation.
The whole 8th episode has been nothing but a cruel masterplan created by Truthless Recluse designed to break Shadow Milk's heart..... How cruel must you be to lie to someone who's just lonely and wants a friend? Just peak psychopathic behavior on PV's part. (He even says that he did that to make Shamil to lower his guard!! He doesn't even hide that and admits his crimes!!)
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Just look how sad and desperate he's here… no one deserve this…....
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And after that betrayal, stab in the back, Pure Vanilla attempted to BEFRIEND him? This is manipulation too. He tries to act like he isn't the bad guy, as if he didn't just break Shadow Milk beyond repair. But how can you befriend someone who deceived you? I don't blame Smilk for refusing this offer run my boy, don't let him trick you!!
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(look at how heartbroken and hurt he is after P**e V*****a beat him up,, talk about 'friendship'...........)
So as you can see this ship SHOULDN'T BE SHIPPED at any point. Pure Vanilla is the abuser, manipulator, gaslighter and a lot more. While Shadow Milk was his poor puppet he played with him for his own amusement. This ship is the worst thing I had yet witnessed in this life and if you ship it uhhhhhh- I hope both sides of your pillow are hot.............................gross..... be better.
.......
...................
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but ngl I think them kissing isn't that bad yk a little bit toxicity in the ship doesn't hurt anyone!!!
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Happy April Fools btw <3 (expect more shadowvanilla art in the future I need them to make out <3)
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ashwhowrites · 9 months ago
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HII, LOVE YOUR WORK. Can you do Eddie Munson x popular reader that he has hopelessly in love with. One day, the reader is trying to avoid this guy who’s been asking her out so she kisses Eddie but from then Eddie thinks they are dating. Not knowing how to tell him to not hurt his feelings but he finds out and feels stupid. WITH HAPPY ENDING!!!
I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻
Jumping ahead
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Eddie had been in love with Y/N ever since high school. He always thought she was cute but she entered high school as a woman, and boy she was a woman.
He felt his mouth go dry whenever she was near him. He barely kept his eyes to himself, finding her anywhere he could. His ears were always perked up to hear her voice and laugh. He worshipped the ground she walked on; she had no idea he existed.
Well, that was until Friday night. Eddie never went to parties but he heard some kids wanted weed. So he went to make fast money. He ignored everyone, letting people come to him.
He heard loud voices come out of the house, and the argument quickly grabbed his attention. He turned to the noise, standing up once he saw Y/N marching outside with a pissed-off look.
Even pissed off she looked beautiful. He watched in case he needed to step in, disliking the way the boy followed her and gripped her arm.
She tried to shove him off but he wouldn't let go. Eddie packed up his stuff and put it underneath the table. Then puffed out his chest and made his way over.
"Let her go," he growled, he was very intimated by the tall and muscular jock but he'd do anything for the girl in front of him.
She looked at him with soft eyes, pleading for help. He gave her a quick glance and glared at the boy.
"This doesn't concern you," the boy argued, his grip still on Y/N.
"It does," Eddie replied, his voice deep as he stepped forward. Eddie wasn't muscular by any means, and he knew he'd definitely get his ass kicked. But the way Y/N was looking at him, so scared and helpless, the bruises would be worth it.
"How so?" The boy asked, letting go of Y/N as he shoved Eddie hard. Eddie stumbled back, almost losing his balance. But he grounded himself to the floor, his hand clenched in a fist as he prepared to throw the first hit.
"Because of this," Y/N said
Within seconds Eddie felt sticky glossy lips pressed against his. His eyes were wide as he looked at her. Her eyes were closed, her hands were in his hair and her tongue slipped in his mouth.
Eddie unclenched his fist and closed his eyes, wrapping his arms around her body. He shoved her against him, shivering at the way she moaned against his tongue.
Was he dreaming? He feared he'd wake up in his bedroom with wet boxers. It felt like they were the only two in the world. He imagined fireworks shooting in the sky.
Y/N was shocked by how much she was enjoying the kiss. His lips and control were so firm, locking her in place. And she liked the way his arms were around her, refusing to let her body move away.
She pulled away, desperate for air. Her eyes locked on Eddie as she felt the afterwaves of the kiss. She never knew much about Eddie, just his name and face. And well now how he tastes.
Y/N turned around to see the boy gone, a relieved smile on her face as she turned to Eddie.
"See you Monday," she said with a flirty smile. She walked away and gave him a wave, a flirty one as her fingers wiggled.
Eddie smiled at the ground, he shoved his hands in his pockets and tried to make his jeans comfortable again.
~~~
Monday rolled around and Eddie had never been so excited to go to school in his life. He walked on cloud nine, a swag in his step as he felt confidence oozing off of him.
Y/N kissed him. She picked him and she made out with him. Then made it clear they were going to see each other again. She never paid attention to him in school, but now she would.
Y/N was putting her lunch in her locker when Eddie appeared next to her. She gave him a polite smile.
"Hey, Y/N," he said with a bright smile. She couldn't help but smile brighter herself as she looked at him.
"Hi, Eddie," she closed her locker and turned her body to face him.
She was stunned when he leaned in and pressed another breath-taking kiss on her lips. She melted and kissed him back, her arms lopping around his neck.
He pulled away, a shy smile on his face. She blinked a thousand times as he simply walked away.
~
Eddie already raced to tell all his friends about the kiss with Y/N. And how they were definitely seeing each other. She kissed him twice, she had to be interested. And boy was he interested in her.
Y/N felt bad for overhearing Eddie's conversation with his friends, but she felt even worse that he believed they were dating after their kiss.
She didn't want to hurt his feelings, but how the hell was she supposed to clear the air?
He was very cute, and he knew how to kiss. She was very interested in getting to know him and open to letting that lead them to dating. But she didn't know anything about him and now he's telling people he's her boyfriend.
She walked away fast, trying to think of how to bring this up to him.
~~
Two weeks passed and she never quite figured out how to say it. He talked to her all the time, held her hand in the halls, and was never shy to place his lips on hers. She really liked all of it.
They did go out on some dates, and she enjoyed his company. Over the two weeks, she had a fat crush on him and wanted to be his girlfriend. So, she figured what he didn't know wouldn't hurt him. She'll gladly be his girlfriend.
But she was so lost in her little relationship that she forgot her friends were snakes. They were quick to gossip and that boy who never gave up on her was making his way back in.
~
"Yo, Eddie. I heard you and Y/N are actually together. Is that true?" Luke asked the name Eddie finally figured out after that party.
"Yes," Eddie said, quick to walk past him but Luke grabbed his arm.
"Now hold on, Munson. Because I heard after she kissed you, you thought you guys were together and she didn't know how to tell you that it was just a kiss."
Eddie felt the color draining from his face. He shook Luke off his arm and made an escape. He racked his brain and felt embarrassment rushing through his body. He was an idiot. He moved way too fast and didn't check to see where she was with all of it.
He also felt terrified. What if she didn't even like him? Just didn't know how to say no so she only went along with it.
He sat in his van, patiently waiting for her to jump in. He heard the door open and she slid in, planting her lips on his cheek and then closing the door.
"Ready?" She asked, he nodded and started the van. She seemed excited and happy to see him, but was all of that an act?
He waited until they sat down at the small restaurant before he questioned her.
"Luke told me something today and I want you to tell me the truth," Eddie said, swallowing nervously.
Y/N sat up straighter, a twist in her stomach. "Of course," she replied with a small hopeful smile.
"Did you mean anything from that kiss? Or was it just a kiss and I got way too ahead of myself?" He asked, she frowned at his sad eyes. She took a deep breath before she spoke.
"You want the truth so I'll give you that. It was supposed to be just a kiss. Something to throw Luke off of me. I'm sorry for using you like that. It was wrong and very wrong to not consider your feelings." She watched as Eddie's shoulders fell. "But" he perked up slightly, looking at her through his lashes with his head down. "I've loved every second we've spent together."
She reached over to softly hold his hand. "I really like you and I'm sorry I didn't say anything. I understand if this changes things, but I'm being honest that I want this with you, for real."
Eddie felt himself smiling at her words before he understood what she said. His stomach fluttered with her hand in his.
"I'm sorry for jumping far ahead without even communicating. I think I got so excited that I didn't even think." Eddie laughed, she giggled with him and rubbed her thumb against the top of his soft skin. "I want this too."
"Really?" She asked, a huge smile broke across her face, and felt excitement in her stomach.
"Have you seen you? Never letting you go." Eddie joked but yet meant every word.
"Can you ask me officially?" She raised her eyebrow with a small smirk on her face.
"Y/N, will you be my wonderful and beautiful girlfriend?" Eddie asked, he already knew the answer but still felt himself getting nervous.
"Absolutely," she said, leaning over the table as she placed a soft and gentle kiss against his lips.
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Tags!
@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlxt @ineedmentalhelp123
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ellesthots · 3 months ago
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iiiii have a one shot prompt!! (if that’s okay)
Bruce and reader in a long term relationship and one day they hit him with “I want a baby” and scare the living Christ out of him?? (the idea came to me in a dream)
u don’t gotta write it if you don’t wanna I jsut thought I’d try to suggest :)
“with you”
bruce wayne x reader
words: 1.3k
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“I want to have a baby.”
The statement fell out after feeling Bruce’s gentle hands on you as he maneuvered to the cutlery, his soft laugh lilting in your ear. You couldn’t hold it in anymore. You’d already almost cracked the night before when he opened a new box of condoms. Your words echoed across the suddenly silent kitchen, and his hands dropped from your waist.
The only indication he’d heard you—or that he hadn’t disappeared—was the breathy, nearly inaudible “What?” a foot behind. You turned to look and he took a step back. His face was ghostly pale, eyes wide. In four years together he’d never looked so petrified, let alone of you.
He prayed he hadn’t heard you correctly. He never prayed. Maybe you wanted to start babysitting, simply have babies around. Surely you didn’t mean…
You cleared your throat, wondering if he truly hadn’t comprehended it. “I want to have a baby with you.”
You’d anticipated some apprehension, sure, it was why you’d wanted to wait until after dinner when you were both relaxed. But Bruce loved kids, and kids loved him. Every holiday with your family all the little cousins, nieces, and nephews flocked to him like a shiny new toy, pouting when he’d have to leave. On your second date (after realizing he was more than just a pretty face—and damn was it pretty), you’d asked the usual questions to filter out mismatches.
“Do you want kids?” You crossed your fingers under the table, conjuring the power of the universe to make this perfect, perfect man be in total alignment.
“Someday, yes. Absolutely.” He smiled, directed the question to you (‘Yes’, and by this point you were absolutely swooning), and the date continued without a hitch.
Now he stared at you like you’d asked him to bury a body.
The pit in your stomach morphed into a boulder as he stumbled out of the kitchen toward the hall. “I need a minute.”
He didn’t hear you say anything else, so he took off down the hallway. Then turned back around, his body buzzing. You stared limply at the bags of groceries adorning the countertops, your eyes flickering up to his in surprise.
“A baby?” The words felt foreign on his tongue. Already the responsibility tore at him, making the edges of his vision white out.
“You said you wanted kids.” Your eyes narrowed when you noticed the shallow heave of his chest. Was he scared?
He wheezed a nervous laugh and leaned against the hallway entrance. He had no clue how to articulate that it was still true with the wind knocked out of him. Not in any way that would be convincing. But so soon? Four years was… not nothing, but he suddenly felt like a helpless child.
He had panic attacks sometimes, and this looked like the beginning of one. As you left the kitchen to close the distance between you, you ached to think that you wanting to start a family would induce such a state. Your voice was softer, tentative. “Do you not want to have one with me?”
Your somber gaze met his like a caress. “Of course I do.” Your face, your eyes, your heart… he couldn’t imagine starting a family with anyone else. The thought was outright blasphemy. He’d thought he wanted kids—no, he knew he wanted kids, but the way you said it made it not only feel real, but within reach. It brought all his fears to the surface.
‘Of course I do’, but he looked devastated, frozen. His hand was quivering when you took it, and when your fingers interlaced, he squeezed. Staring at you with unblinking, timid eyes that broke your heart. His mouth opened but nothing came out. You released his hand, upset you’d even brought it up. “Let’s make dinner, okay?”
Ten minutes prior, the kitchen was full of whistles, jokes, and the crunch of snacking on groceries. At present, the hollow sound of knives slapping wood cutting boards filled the space. You lamented on the terrible timing of your ask, kicking yourself for not taking greater care. Talking about getting pregnant, about having and raising a child, starting a family, it wasn’t something you could be so flippant about. No wonder he’d reacted like that.
Dinner was tense. You ate in silence, punctuated only by an occasional scrape of metal on ceramic. Bruce was so kind, probably preparing how to let you down easily. Ask to push it back a few years. Promise to be ready by then, apologizing for making you wait.
He got up abruptly, leaving to where you could only imagine was the Batcave. You put your head in your hands. Or he’d changed his mind, and was about to break things off with you. You shoved your plate away, tears springing to your eyes. You knew it was too good to last. It would always end up here eventually.
Bruce didn’t come back for hours. You tried to distract by vegging out on the couch to a show, but your stomach swam with tight, jumbled knots. On a constant loop were memories you’d never experience again. Last holidays together, last nights sleeping in the same bed, soon to be last hugs. Hopefully he’d at least give you a kiss goodbye. You pulled a blanket over you as a chill swept your bones. It didn’t warm you.
By the time you heard movement in the house, you’d migrated to your shared bedroom and tucked under the covers. How would you explain it to your parents? That the man you loved more than anything in the world would now be relegated to pictures stowed in their attic? His footsteps drew closer. You held your breath. This is it.
He stood in the doorframe, illuminated in the night by a single bedside lamp. You’d miss this. You’d miss him. So much.
You spoke at the same time. “I’ll get my stuff.”
“Let’s do it.”
Your ‘what’s stacked atop each other. His brow furrowed as he stepped into the room, crouching beside the bed. The air had been removed from your lungs. “I thought…” You searched his face, dizzy. “With the way you were acting,”
He shook his head, horrified he’d left you like this so long. “I’m so sorry,” he took your hand and drew reassuring circles along your palm. He’d come up as quickly as he could get a reign on himself, get his body to stop shaking and his mind to stop racing. He’d wanted to ensure this moment would be a good one, not ruined by his anxieties.
“It made it feel tangible when you said it, and…” he trailed off, thoughts swirling again. He swallowed hard. “I was nervous. I am nervous. I don’t have experience with it, of even being parented.” The rumination he’d tried to leave in the cave came back to him. “What if something happened to us, or something happened to them?” He struggled to blink away the sting in his eyes. “I wouldn’t be able to handle it.”
And everything clicked into place. You cupped his cheek with your cold, clammy hand, soothed by the heat off his skin and the roughness of his stubble. He leaned into your touch. For a minute you both sat in the tenderness, soft waves of wondering how you could convince him he had nothing to worry about. That even if he did mess up, or something did happen, he was persevering, loving, and everything good in the world.
“But I want to try." As his panic had subsided, he'd been left with a thought so hopeful and persuasive it threatened a sob: he didn't want the possibility of tragedy to stop him from living.
"I’d do anything with you. I want this.” He wore his earnestness on his sleeve, his words mushy and saccharine, if a little shaky. Looking into your glowing, radiant face, imagining it mirrored. A small smile tugged up his lips. “As long as they have your eyes.”
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a/n: this was such a cute idea!! i can imagine him becoming overwhelmed almost thinking he's a living curse, down there freaking out about potentially traumatizing someone like he'd been traumatized, or the fear of having his heart walking around outside of his body. thanks so much for the prompt!!! <3
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letters-to-lgbt-kids · 5 months ago
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(Content warning: US election/politics) 
My dear lgbt+ kids, 
Over the last few days, the phrase “Hope for the best but prepare for the worst” came to my mind a lot. 
My post with safety tips (things you can do now that may potentially help when project 2025 comes) got a lot of notes, and many people added on their own advice or ideas. I wrote that post when I was still very much in the initial stage of shock over the election result. I wrote it because I felt really helpless and enraged and scared and heartbroken… and I just felt like I had to do something, anything, to help before the world goes to hell. I guess that’s a feeling a lot of us had or are still having. 
I didn’t want to - or maybe I just couldn’t at that stage - talk about hope in that post. How could I watch a fascist criminal become one of the most powerful men on earth and then go on my silly little blog to ramble about hope? In fact, I told you that you don’t need to feel optimistic, but you need to take care of yourself. You need to be kind to yourself. 
What I didn’t say (and should have said) is that taking care of yourself IS hope. 
None of the safety tips I shared or the ones you guys added would matter if it wasn’t for hope. We need to believe in a future to prepare for it. To fight for it. 
If we didn’t have hope, we wouldn’t make appointments to get an IUD or a flu shot. We wouldn’t share advice on which health products to stock up on. We wouldn’t remind each other to check in and connect with each other. We wouldn’t share advice and resources and ideas with each other. If we believed we are all doomed and there’s no future, we’d do none of that - because you wouldn’t fight for a future if there wasn’t one. 
Every time I see that post popping up in my notifications, I am reminded that there is hope. Because hope isn’t just a feeling. It’s an action. And I see you taking that action.
We are here and we are queer and we are willing to fight for our future. And as long as that’s true, there is hope. 
With all my love, 
Your Tumblr Dad 
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childrenofcain-if · 2 months ago
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Ignore this if you've answered this ask before but if the ROs or MC got pregnant while they are in university, will they keep the baby or not?
if MC is the one who got pregnant (it ultimately depends on the MC btw):
CÉDRIC LACROIX: cédric will be very against the idea at first but once he sees that you don’t want to give the baby up, he’ll support you regardless. you’ll also have the duration of the pregnancy to see how he has a turnaround and actively tries to be a good dad before the kid is even born. i’d say that out of all the ROs, he’s the one who’s going to be overbearing and going all out on his fatherly duties.
VANCE NÆSHOLM: vance would be supportive from the get go about keeping the kid. if things get too hard, he’ll offer to drop out and be a stay-at-home dad and get an online degree instead. he’ll just be happy to be having a baby with you and make sure he’s always there for you both.
WILHELM OSTENDORF: all that breeding kink accounted for something, i guess? either way, billy will be overjoyed. yes, he knows the timing is very bad but he truly believes you can both get through it. good luck getting him to stop talking to the baby in your belly and telling them stories about you two.
DUMITRU DIACONU: oh hell no! dumitru will very much want you to delete the baby, but if you insist on keeping them, he’ll disappear for 2-3 days without a trace. when he returns, his dramatic ass will literally be on his knees and telling you that losing you is so much worse than being a dad (what a charmer) and beg for you to give him one more chance. to his credit, he matures a lot in the duration of your pregnancy and gives up a lot of his vices. you’ll even find him singing a song he wrote for your future baby to your belly when he thinks you’re asleep.
MAXWELL WHITLOCK-SINGH: maxwell will strongly object to you keeping the baby, but he is helpless to do anything if you do not agree with him. the royal family will disown him over the fact that he had a baby out of wedlock with a filthy rich commoner, but he also doesn’t want to lose the love of his life and their child. in the end, he’ll tell his immediate family about the situation and marry you before the baby is born.
if the ROs are the ones who got pregnant:
CÉLINE LACROIX: shocked. confused. scared. céline doesn’t want to terminate the pregnancy but she’s very young and she wants to accomplish a lot before even thinking about having kids. she’ll get an abortion but will be very traumatised by the whole experience.
VANESSA NÆSHOLM: vanessa will keep the baby. and it’s not because of religious reasons, surprisingly. she just feels an instant connection with the baby growing inside her and would want to keep them. she dreams about how they might look and grow up to be and is just happy that they’re a part of you both.
WILHELMINE OSTENDORF: considering billie’s health currently, the baby would likely be miscarried. this is especially devastating because she would like to keep them. she has always wished for a family with you and it’ll be a cruel outcome for everyone.
DUMITRA DIACONU: dumitra is getting an abortion as soon as she’s able to. she is not becoming a mother before she even graduates college! besides, she isn’t exactly fond of the idea of ever having kids at the moment. although she might change her mind in the future if you talk to her.
MAXINE WHITLOCK-SINGH: not only is it gonna be a complete scandal which will make the royal family turn upside down, maxine will 100% get disowned by even her parents if she keeps the baby. she also isn’t a huge fan of experiencing motherhood before she even graduates from law school so it’s a no from her, love.
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cloudysonder · 2 months ago
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UGH reading the S-classes I raised and this actually
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Makes me SO emotional—
The fact that yj’s little brother feels helpless in trying to help yj bc he KNOWS that yj still sees himself as his parent, who has to protect him, who’ll never share his burdens with him
And yj is such a kind person and a caretaker at heart that he keeps adding unloved people to his family that he swears to take care of, bc he’s the one person who isn’t scared of them and sees them as the kids they are
EXCEPT ☝️ that fucking bitch sung hyunjae
Has never needed yj’s protection
Is the only person that yj really doesn’t understand/trust
Is the only person that can instantly pick up on whatever scheme yj is cooking up
Is the only person sensitive enough to realize that yj turned back time and thus, becomes the only one yj can confide in about his grief for his dead little brother in a broken timeline:
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LIKE???? SORRY THIS IS THE MOST ROMANTIC THING IVE EVER SEEN
The slight bitterness sung hyunjae has that he never had someone to care about him and grieve him the way yj did for his little brother… the sinking in of Just How Much yj loves yoohyun and Just How Far he would go for yoohyun
The realization that yj doesn’t realize yoohyun and the rest of his found family would do the same for him, and moreover, yj WOULDNT L E T them ever do the same for him, bc he should’ve died in that timeline, this is stolen time he got through the death of his little brother, why would he ever deserve to be protected
So it’s in this moment sung hyunjae realizes, oh. I need to protect him. I’m the only one who can, because I’m the only one he doesn’t need to protect.
He is the only one who has ever seen hyunjae for who he was, and hyunjae will pay that back for the rest of his life. No. He needs to.
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