#and i don't cry often
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#neg /#i want to be here to write but i can't yet#i cried like three times today#and i don't cry often#i just . am so overwhelmed and sad#and i can't bring myself to do as much as i'd like work-wise#i have no energy#sorry for the vent i just . would rather scream into the void about my stupid little feelings right now#thank you for being patient with me . and kind and gentle#and thank you for wishing me well last night#i will personally thank you all soon
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making myself sad by drawing arthur
#rdr2#barghestland#arthur morgan#i don't draw him often#tbh.. that's like.. my second time drawing him or something?#not because i don't like him (i love him so much ok)#but drawing him just makes me extremely sad#im on chapter 6 again im not ready for this#i wanna hug him and tell him he's a good man:(#i also need a hug as well this shit is depressing#if ya wanna have a crying session invite me or something
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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Another thing that makes kaladin so painfully relatable is how much his mental illness hides his personality, because between depressive episodes and trauma he's this sarcastic little shit that smiles a lot at his friends and then the depression gets to him and all that disappears
#I'm dreading book 4 so much#my depression got worse while reading it the first time 😭#also I don't remember exactly what but multiple times he says stuff that i think too often and having a fictional character say that l#ridiculous stuff caused by mental illness made me feel even worse#it helped! because it hit me how stupid it is and that i should avoid that type of thinking at all costs! but didn't i feel like shit for a#while#now i almost finished book 1 and book 2 has Shallan's past 😬😬😬😬😬#can't wait to read again about her horrible childhood locked home with a violent father that take out his rage at her on others#that won't make me feel horrible at all!#it's not like i wasn't almost crying just at her getting an anxiety attack at the beginning#....these books feels awfully aimed at me fjskdks#the stormlight archive#cosmere
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I'd be lying if I said I haven't been having a hard time lately. It's been a very tough year. Rainy reminds me it's ok to cry. If I cry, I'll cry, but I'll still keep going, I just need to take a moment to cry.
#weather friends#vent art#crying#tears#my oc#sunnyaliceart#my art#rainy#it's ok to cry#you're not alone#I have a wonderful wife and amazing friends that support me#let the feelings flow#I don't vent art often but it felt good to express myself this way#hang in there#keep going
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I wince every time I see the documentary Disclosure celebrated as a great description of transness in media. It just hurt me too much to watch that for a trans studies class only to feel unseen and be told that transmasc invisibility is a "privilege" compared to what trans women get. Yeah, it's such a privilege that before 2006 I could only find exactly 9 depictions of transmasculinity and basically every single one is problematic in some way, including painting us as freakish and violent. How about considering that both situations are problems.
#transandrophobia#looking for analyses of trans history and this just keeps coming up ugh#I say basically because I'm not familiar enough with boys don't cry except for the media reception & one film's problem was just the bindin#some examples include painting us as girly in several old TV shows & as (often sexually aggressive) murderers in some old movies & CSI#disclaimer that the 9 are only the ones in english I could find/access#mine#disclosure
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lineart canceled i can't draw a fucking shoulder
here's the sketch. whatever. im going to sleep
#im going to cry ive been trying for two hours fuck me and fuck drawing shoulders. fuck all anatomy actually#the terror#Mine#thomas jopson#jopzier#Because i said so#I don't give up on projects often but man... This one really almost made me cry#Im done with it. Never touching it again#GoodDAY SIR
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CQL's crybaby Nie Mingjue appreciation post
I always see people talking about CQL's Nie Mingjue crying constantly, and they're right to do so, but I haven't seen those scenes compiled so I thought it would be a good idea to do it, since it's one of my favorite things about this version of NMJ.
*I'll consider the times he was tearing up too because I think they're important, but i'm only considering "full crying scenes" the ones where there are actual tears falling down his face.
*It's all in chronological order.
Episode 41 - defending Meng Yao
Why is NMJ crying? Crying is his response to everything, okay? NMJ is very emotionally invested in everything he does. He's very mad these men for saying terrible things about Meng Yao while benefiting from his labour. He's so emotionally invested in everything he does.
Is it a full crying scene? No, he tears up the entire time he's scolding the cultivators but those tears don't leave his eyes.
Episode 10 - being threatened by Wen Chao
Why is NMJ crying? Wen Chao is being very disrespectful, as he often is. And it's understandable, NMJ is hurt, his home was invaded, some of his soldiers are dead and it's overall a terrible time for everybody. To be honest, though, I think he's tearing up out of pure rage because Wen Chao just mentioned what Wen Xu did to the Cloud Recesses.
Is it a full crying scene? No. I almost didn't include this one because it's very subtle but his eyes look too shiny to be ignored.
Episode 10 - expelling Meng Yao from the Unclean Realm
Why is NMJ crying? It's a very emotional and conflicting moment on top of a terrible day, on top of a very stressful period of his life. He was betrayed by his friend who saved his life right afterwards; his home was invaded and they're at war! He has every right to cry as much as he did.
Is it a full crying scene? Hell yes, and it's glorious. They even end the episode with his miserable little crying face.
Episode 41 - Everything, really
Why is NMJ crying? Everything sucks, he's defeated and hurt in front of the man who killed his father. He didn't get his personal revenge and he didn't free the world from Wen Ruohan's tyranny either. Instead, he watched helplessly as his men were murdered and now he has to watch his former deputy mock his father's death and threaten to have Wen Ruohan damage Baxia like he did with his father's blade.
Is it a full crying scene? No, only because he's being very brave about it. I have no idea how those tears didn't fall.
Episode 41 - confrontation at Jinlintai
Why is NMJ crying? Very difficult topics being discussed here. People who are way better with words than I am have already written amazing meta on how having his worldview challenged like this affects NMJ emotionally, so I won't go there. But between the song of turmoil making him more emotionally unstable and the disdain with which JGY talks about the men he killed, evoking this very traumatic moment I just mentioned on the previous crying scene; I think it's very understandable.
Is it a full crying scene? Yes! Most of the time he's holding back tears, but you can see the one dramatic tear running down his nose (on the outside of it) on the second gif!
In conclusion: he has so much to cry about, it's surprising he didn't cry more, it must have taken so much strength (or he was just crying offscreen, which is plausible, because sadly this isn't The Nie Mingjue show and we don't see him all the time)
Anyway, I am not here to claim he's not a crybaby because he absolutely is, but on the actual show we only have 2 full crying scenes. They were so impactful it feels like much more crying happened. Fatal Journey is it's own thing so I made a separate post for those tearing up, crying and emotional breakdown lovely scenes <3
#nie mingjue#this isn't meta this is me discovering the joy of making decent gifs#cql#long post#kinda#despite often being at the crime scene i won't tag jgy or nieyao because i don't go there and i'm not a fan but yall do whatever you want#i just wanted to look at his pretty crying face and have more than just screenshots of it#like look at him!! how can you say mean things to him or in his general vicinity knowing it will make him cry?#monsters all of them#the zoom on the second to last gif makes it so funny though#anyway i hope my gifs aren't horrible to tumblr standards
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saw drawing requests were open and all I want to see is Dev and Peri hug because they deserve happiness
Hope you enjoy! I haven't drawn Dev until now, gave me an excuse to.
#I feel like Dev should get to cry a good cry okay#like yes he is a pos but damn his life sucks emotionally#I don't think he would cry often. just kinda one of those scenes where he's just overloaded with emotion. like horse in centaurworld.#I request reblogs bc i spend time on lined and colored drawings. but ik ppl usually ignore that lol#peri fop#fairly oddparents#the fairly oddparents#fairly oddparents a new wish#peri fairywinkle cosma#dev dimmadome#fairly oddparents poof#fop fanart#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents fanart#fairly oddparents peri#fopanw#fop#dev and peri
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I cry at every single haiku mini-game in ghost of tsushima. the beauty and importance of art during brutal invasion gets to me.
#especially in the eyes of a ukrainian artist#personal#ghost of tsushima#the music when haiku is finished....ah#the concept is so beautiful#really teaches you to be more observant#I don't cry often lately cause I'm a bit bottled up#but they just open something within me
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He's making sure dice's sacrifice isn't in vain (or so he claims)
#today on shitposts i spent half the day on#the cuphead show#probably someone already drew it but i didnt see it so i had to satisfy myself now thst i know how to draw this man#i NEED to see him be a cry baby more often in the show#the cuphead show devil#i don't remember if he cries on the show and is shown with red tears or other colored tears#the devil cuphead#king dice cuphead#technically#and#devildice#because i suppose they'll enjoy it#the cuphead show fanart#im an og fan yet this is my first piece of fanart. historic#my art
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"Not I," I said, "I love you."
Yet when blood was on your face I knew you not.
"Would you follow me, my child? Even in the dark?"
But when the light blew dim I fled.
You told me of the future, and of a joy to come
You loved me and you taught me
"I know your heart, my child."
When you were weak and weary where was I to comfort?
When you cried out for the Father I hid my face.
I saw you. I saw your eyes and anguish.
O how it pierced me. How could I abandon you?
"Not I," I said, "I love you." But how could it be true?
I turned and left my lover.
Weak and twisted is the heart that claimed to live for you
How can it be, how can I live? I wish to love you.
Yet it is a dead heart that saw your face among the crowd.
A light flew across the distance. On the wings of your suffering.
O how it pierced me. My eyes have opened.
I don't deserve to be here, to sing and see the dawn
Lord let me live and love you
How I was meant to all along
#poetry#poem#poems on tumblr#poemblr#easter poem#salt and light#easter thoughts#text#writing#my writing#mini ramble hold on#growing up i heard the concept 'if youd been there youd be in the crowd cursing him and spitting on him' kinda deal often#and not that i think its Wrong exactly. or that it cant be good for meditation. but i don't know if it worked for me#it just really confused me like. but....i know jesus why would i suddenly go Evil...what about the people who knew him...they weren't#what about mary who was crying while everyone else cursed him?#as i got older i realized that i felt myself much more it Peter's place. being one who knew jesus. who loved him. who said you'd follow him#and yet... keeps messing up. so these are just my thoughts on that
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You guys have no idea how much they mean to me.
I love these disasters so freaking much.
Separate pics on invisible bg if you'd like to use them as reaction memes or something.
Have fun!
#donatello rottmnt#leonardo hamato#leonardo rottmnt#donatello hamato#disaster twins#disaster duo#save rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt art#rottmnt fanart#luxtoony#my art#unpause rise of the tmnt#they literally make me cry#I think ab them way too often#and you will see them on this blog many many times bc I won't shut up#to whom it may concern#doc oc donnie is in the making I didn't abadon this idea don't worry
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how/where do you like to get slapped?
HARD IN THE FACE
#it does make me cry though which throws a lot of people off. so I don't get to get hit very often :(((#im not a huge masochist tbh it's more about the shock and complete lack of control (and a little bit the pain also)#idk man I need somebody to use me until I break#in the full “sobbing and begging” way#and i need them to get off on it also. thats very important#bitts answers
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What am I doing in the jayvik ship tag I DON'T EVEN SHIP THEM-
It's the art
It's always the goddamn art
#especially the season 2 one#cuz I'm a sucker for this type of religious (can I say reverent? etheral? transcendental?) art#might sound weird but it's also connected to sailor moon if you think about many of the images especially from the manga#it's just so freaking good#just so we're clear I don't mind the ship#I don't really have any in arcane so I'm fine with most of them#and whatever's happening with these two is so messed up well-written and great it makes me cry inside#I know the art is often intended as romantic first and foremost but the form is just *chef's kiss*#so it's kinda more important to me than the fact a ship is involved (I'm justifying it as if it was sth bad XD)#also yes it's probably beacause it's mainly viktor fanart; I have my favourites#also also I have like 2 presentations to make for uni WHAT AM I DOING AT 2 AM LOOKING AT THE SHIP I DON'T SHIP#anyway#my point is: god bless artists#people are so talented#jayvik#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane season 2#mine#you know what I mean
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youtube
#Sleep Token#Youtube#i don't#i don't cry from music often#and i guess i still haven't considering what this was#but the intro monologue to this performance#made me burst into tears in under 60 seconds just now#first it was slow#just teared up a little bit... i didn't even realize what it was saying.. much less that it was from HIM#and then he said something and it was full on sobbing#I'd go check again to tell you what it was but I just pulled myself back together and I can't like do that again#what the frick...#like vessel doesn't talk during performances ever bc y'know he's possessed by whatever gave him some of the coolest music in existence#so this monologue like touches all the more... he's SPEAKING to US#THANKING US#for listening to the music that he -in this case- put so much of his pain into#he knows we're thankful for them#but he's also thankful for us#and then like as the song goes on he just pounds those keys and screams those lyrics and the vesselette has to go check on him at the end#like frick if that doesn't mess you up... aguuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh#...#I just wanted to see what a live performance of bloodsport was and apparently I clicked on the worst one bc nowhere else does this play#sleep token thank you
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